#oooh i just got so many characters im obsessed with

[mostlikelyshutup]

-> describe yourself ONLY with pictures you have, you CANNOT search or download new pictures!

tagged by @crime-wives ty darling friend

no presh tags: @horsetailcurlers2 @knifebucket @emily-prentits @coratatum @secret-mafia-boss @shortangrybisexual @dirtbagdefender

[captainshyguy]

6 bc im curious and 9 bc i wanna see ur hit list /hj

aaa ty belle!!

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

hmmm, not to my knowledge! the closest has been somthing ve been neutral bout/thought was kinda silly like melli and ingo lol, like i didnt hate it, but was neutral, and now i think its hilariousKJDSNGSDJ

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

(if these end up in characters tag i apologise but i aint censoring every single damn name! im not tagging and that should be enough)

oooh im gonna expand this bit beyond my regular fandoms bc there are some little fuckers out there i really hatein othe thinhs gkgjd, lets do regular fandoms first though

hollow knght: tpk, lurien, tiso. tpk for obvious reasons (plus i dont really like a lot of high up characters in general like focusing on tpk in fics kinda makes me eyes roll when the vessels are right there. lurien for reasons :). tiso because people went through a stint where he was just silly himbo and kept shippig him with quirrel nd i fucking hated that lol. his design slaps though

tcw: the bad batch lol fucking HATE them. tech is tolerable, and i dont even count echo one of them, free him!!! but the rest are condesceding assholes sorry idc if they get better in their own show like sorry you sold them to me as 'ooo arent they soooo cool theyre so much better than those Regulr Clones Boooo, look at them!!! like fuck off lol. you will never be captain rex

pokemon: not a big fan of 'hehee im a cutesy quirky little girl!! chracters, like sabi or poppy like. theyre fine i guess but eh. not for me. otherwise swordbert and shieldbert were also annoying kjgskgj

off the top of my head i cant really think of many for mario besides like...idk cranky kong specifically in the mario movie? awful voice perfromace. i guess waluigi too sorry, i m not a fan of like..idk, more basic mario chracters who dont really show up in non mulitplyar games, bc they end up beign sooo known and its like. bro they didnt even put him in wonder or 3d world or anything. like if u want him to be a staple mario character to me then put him in other games too, or i'll just roll my eyes that he's taking up space where someone like cpatain toad or peasley could be taking it lol

undertale/deltarune: detanged one but ice-e. ex went through a period where he as weirdly obsessed with him and thought he'd be super important and it annoyed me :)

ok now outside of my regular fdoms, characters i still loathe include

ralph from the flash- he was this stretchy dude who was awful abt women and like sure he kiiiida got over it but it felt weak and i hated him and the actor ended up being shitty anyway.. in the same universe i didnt like either oliver or barry's daughters from the future, both were very annoying lol

mon el from super girl. i hate him. kill him.annoying boring no chemistry love interest. kill him

eric sparrow from tony hawks underground- though i will concede that like the hollow knight characters, he contrbutes in really important ways to the story. like your'e SUPPOSED to hate him thats the point, they do a very good job with it. like he's written fantastically, and i want to kill him. i alway think of this article i read about him that was like 'eric sparrow is my best friend and he wants to hurt me' like yeah thats it thats the character. like i LIKE WHAT THEY DID, which sets him apart from almost everyone else here, its just what they did makes you hate him lol

ross from friends. miserable, insecure little creep. kill him

there are little charcters i loathe more than peter griffin family guy. kill bite explode

[swordfaery]

Hiii i was tagged by @protectoroffaeries

Rules: shuffle your ‘on repeat’ playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then list 10 songs you really like, each by a different artist. then tag 10 people to do the same thing.

i wanted to talk about everything so im putting it all under a readmore

on repeat:

good girls don't get used by beach bunny (ok so i listen to a lot of beach bunny. like a lot. i dont know why but it has that bpd swag and literally no else feels this theyre like its just cookie cutter straight girl music and Maybe It Is but i like. big fan of sports also would not surprised if that also crops up)

crooked teeth by death cab for cutie (this is my current favourite song. literally i hear it n im like hehe my song, n idk why i dont really like any of their other stuff)

steady, as she goes by the raconteurs (this is just bcos i like indie rock)

what went down by foals (ok. ok. this FUCKING album i have so many emotions about im like wow this album is literally about me for real and it is not in the slightest but anyway if you also like it talk to me about it im always like i am going to ANALYSE THE SHIT out of this album n ill get to like. birch trees n realise i dont know shit about music i just like the way the repeating motif combines with the sense of regret and going back to ur roots n shit)

up to no good by the hoosiers (literally i just love the undulating instrumentals in this ESPECIALLY the intro)

like sexy dynamite by orion expirience (im such a slut for orion expirience i love all their jazzy stuff n again. feels bpd coded n idk why potenially just the art of writing a song about being obsessed with someone and all the emotions in music are kinda close to how my intense bpd times feel. sorry ive been trying to tone down my bpd talk bcos i think its not helpful or fun for anyone but w music its like. oh this is bcos im boarderline this is bcos im boarderline. this post is gonna be so long im so sorry i will tag it)

chevvy thunder by spector (im just a big fan of this it goes so hard n the. suicide fakeouts w the enjambment really fuckin. i just love it)

goodbye mr a by the hoosiers (again. hoosiers got a great sound)

curses by the crane wives (musically very intersting i love the up n down of it idk how to explain it but it feels like sort of. a bobbing kinda dance)

little dark age by mgmt (i tried to get into dubstep bcos of donnie from rise tmnt. i do not know what dubstep is. it isnt this)

like all by different artists. this doesnt have to be different from artists in the og list right? i hope not

dance music by the mountain goats (i discovered this song like yesterday and oooh boy)

supermassive black hole by muse

lonely hunter by foals (again. what went down album. iconic. this one has the line love is not a gun in your hands though and aughhh)

i dare you by the regrettes (literally just a delightful love song that isnt about being gay but i think it is)

the main character by will wood (bpd)

cold weather by glass beach (bpd)

oh girl your the devil by mika (the no place in heaven album is fucking. chefs kiss. im obsessed with its like being gay, religious trauma, pop but with a funky style. incredible)

bad idea by girl in red (im just gay and make bad sexual decisions)

i dont care by fall out boy (bpd)

moth man by dirty bynam (this one is just fun)

okayyy im tagging @phantomxblood @teddybear-tebbydear @lemondoddle @alfredolover119 @lasilhouetteinbianco @jamesspidercat @kirkwords @thatsrightzoeyeyye @morgan-is-here @bookshelpwithmysocialanxiety

[blkkizzat]

Haiiii babes!!!! Hope u been well 😙

(Literally just came from rereading plug choso once again to keep it fresh in my brain hehe) istg i love him so bad but….nicki was right, trauma is the way. Him sharing that blunt with gouda bitch has me steaming every time smh. I would fuck cho infront of her but she dont deserve to see the dickk!

Venus in gemini and mars in aries HELP HSJKSKSK NO OKAY U and toji would be so good for each other 😭 yall can play games and he drag u back in so u dont get too bored hehe. My mars is in leo and my good friend studies astrology and she deadass do be saying thats the corruption kink placement hehe, plus i got some virgo in there too so my shit is obsesseddddd with corrupting purity whoops (and obsessive + possessive AF like i wanna be someone's first and their everything) which is so true cause i be fucking with ppl to make em obsessed with me and ion even want them jdksks. I js cant do virgin reader bc i have a SA trauma which sucks bc there are so many virgin reader fics and i gotta sit em out which is why i flock to shit like otaku!gojo where the man is a virgin like that heals me so much u have no idea lmao (even tho this pussy can squirt by itself, i would show virgin gojo all the tricks hehe) Yes ma'am i do fuck w astrology, and recently tarot a lil bit 👀 got me a lil reading and erthing hehe

Tbf i dont feel like u have a truly irredeemable character because they all have some sort of bg story (okay lets ignore reader from gf!choso literally killing a man bc DAMN when i say the dialogue you gave him had me stressing tf out, like i almost had an angry cry when he was airing out shit at the party. The bat scene from there was so iconic tho) like even plug choso, reader is a brat but i rlly feel like its bc shes an overachiever which i vibe w soooo hard. She's the definition of "honey u need to get some dick and RELAX" bc she trying to do it all and none of it is for herself. Im similar so i see her bratiness as a defense mechanism iykwim. Ngl the ending of pt 2 had me scared bc like i can dish it out, but i cant take it LMAOOOOOO like choso shared a blunt w some other bitch and i was already in tears istg he gon have to make that up to me smh. YESSSSSSS i love with the characters are still downbad for the reader even when she's a bitch like, thats the kinda ride or die i wantttt.

I feel u bc i cant do angst that effects the reader lol.

Guestprofessor yooooo i love that dynamic!!! I rarely read gojo (or geto too) bc i rarely find a version of him that doesnt turn his charisma into fuckboyness like it just aint for me, but w.e the girlies enjoy :p

Ohhh i do need to check out those websites even tho i have nowhere to go rip. I love me a gown but they almost never reach past my shins 💀 got that damn amazoness genetic smh

LMFAOOO ur so real for that. Tbh cho could be a virgin and id still talk to him like a two dollar hoe 😭

Sending u all the good vibes frrrrr its always fun chatting w u too kali babes 😚

🍒 anon

Awe you are so sweet reading it again. I hope I can get the next part out tonight for u, I’m getting 2 people to read so once they are done I will make changes and post. 

LMFAO im crying cause you are like the 3rd person who told me that part had them heated. But hehe funny you should mention fucking him in front of her…. *shhhh*

Yeah no I would need the games to keep me interested lmfao. Oooh corruption kink!  you know until Choso I never had one of those but I just want to ruin him dskhfkjhdkHSa. But relatable, sometimes you just flirt because you can LOL

Oh no, im so sorry to hear about your SA trauma. I completely understand. While I don’t necessarily have drama, I think another reason I lean towards bimbo!reader is I don’t like how society places a woman’s value on virginity. It’s a totally different thing that wanting to be someone’s first or even corrupting, cause im into those kinks too. I don’t like when it seems like the whole value of them is their virginity if it makes sense. 

I actually own a tarot deck too! But I haven’t studied it enough to do it on my own. I’ve had mine done by friends before though!

Lmfao yeah gf!choso reader is also a bit crazy, when I eventually do the p3 to that, it will go into more of how she doesn’t have bloodlust like choso, and actually wants him to slow down a bit so he doesn’t get caught (gf!choso finds himself not needing to kill as much bc he has reader as a stress release). But she doesn’t have qualms with blood or the fact he’s a serial killer lolol. She kinda slow lowkey lolol. Her mind: “killing is bad. But I love Choso and he loves me so Choso is good too.” I mean she joined his major cause she watched Dexter so she aint the brightest bulb. jhdfkhdskjfhsd. <3 Unlike plug!choso sorority bimbo tho, she is never ashamed of Choso and wants him to come to frat parties as her date (which he reluctantly goes to because he’s whipped and jealous as all hell). Ahhh I rambled about this too much lol

Oooh how tall are you if you don’t mind me asking? Im 5’7 and some of the gowns I got from there drag a bit so maybe you’d have more luck with them!

Mwahhmwahhh babes <3333

[misqnon]

ranting about the dragon prince under cut (and by ranting i mean. criticizing it)

Season 5 of the dragon prince comes out soon. and I'm gonna watch it, bc I'm genuinely interested in the story and (some) of the characters but Bro.

This show could have been SOOOO GOOD and in my opinion it is just so. so held back by all these weird avoidable flaws

like, the extremely childish humor. like bad

the weird writing, the odd pacing, the strange focus on humor bits that aren't funny and literally take away precious time from the VERY INTRICATE PLOT THEYRE TRYING TO TELL BUT NO LOOK AT THESE PASTRIES GETTING ON PEOPLE'S FACES HEHEHE FART JOKE AS WELL

and the conflicts are Extremely Obvious and on the nose. like that episode between the sun elves and the human camp

I know this show is inspired by avatar but that's like the perfect example of how to make a show for kids that isn't excessively Childish. they've made like 4 kinda tryhard avatar references so LEARN FROM THE SHOW U KEEP TALKING ABT BRO 😭😭

now that I think about it the entirety of the dragon prince feels like of all of atla was under the same writing vibes as the great divide episode. like epic plot, epic characters (aaravos, the dragons, rayla and the moonshadow elves, viren, ezran as a child king!) But then they have the most threatening character in the entire show do shit like nose booping for a funny haha. but it's so cringe

or when they made that weird joke about claudia loving the smell of her boyfriends farts bc they smell like petrichor?? HELLO????

I could also mention the elephant in the room of how aaron eehasz got allegations for having a semi-abusive work environment (especially towards women) during like seasons 1 and 2 I think?? Idk where that went cause its been such a long time and I don't follow anything about the show aside from watching it

And this is less of a thing about the actual show but. The Fandom. Is so.

I feel bad saying this cause they aren't even problematic necessarily its just very weird and annoying and kinda. Kinda dumb

I see so many tdp posts on my dash just from following the tag of people obsessing over rayla and callum like its the deepest het ship in existence when its two teenagers who have known each other for like a year and have very basic chemistry

and it follows the same weird Fandom phenomenon that royai does where you have a perfectly healthy and equal het ship and the fandom takes it and goes OOOH LETS PUT GENDER ROLES ON IT AND CALL IT CUTE <333

also people commenting about how deep the show is when it's really?? Not?? They paint it with flowery language and dramatics in these pretentious tumblr posts about the show and then it's really not that at all? like don't get me wrong the world building is obviously intricate and you can tell they went full in and had fun with it (behind the scenes) but how much of it really made it into the show. and also...worldbuilding =/= emotional depth.

there ARE really good moments and the coin thing with raylas family is cool and so it claudia's journey but even some of these are cut down by the random shitty humor that's always ruining everything including tense scenes, moods, and screentime

also the other day someone posted an AI generated image of a dude who barely looked like callum with actual random circles on his face from AI distortion, tagged it, paraded it off as fanart, and there were like FORTY PEOPLE IN THE NOTES SAYING LIKE "great fanart :3" "love the idea!" "nice art!" And I commented that it was AI and they blocked me like YOU GUYS ARE SO....STUPID

kay im done sorry

[lindszeppelin]

Elvis and Austin!Elvis Ask game

The incredible @aconflagrationofmyown has created a list of questions regarding Elvis and Austin!Elvis. Behind the "read more" are my answers! Thank you so much for creating this <3

Here's a list of all the lovely people I wanna tag to answer this. We all probably tagged eachother but I don't wanna miss anyone lol.

-> a link to the original Qs to copy+paste [x]

@powerofelvis @ash-omalley @bisexualwvtson @succsessions @butlers-bitch @mamaspresley @himbocampus @stargiirl27 @pennyroyalcreep @loving-elvis @eliseinmemphis @deke-rivers-1957 @bcofl0ve @fantuhsise @elvisstyles @missmaywemeetagain @heartbrake-hotel @elvisabutler @asrealasadonut @sapphirescripts@carnevol @sassy-ahsoka-tano @if-i-can-dream-of-elvis @troubleinapinksuit @karamelcoveredolicity

•When and what was your first exposure to Elvis Presley? I knew about Elvis from a young age, but it was nothing too serious. Full House was my most consistent exposure because I loved that sitcom, and Jesse being obsessed with Elvis was his running gag but I correlated Elvis to John Stamos forever lol. Another jumping off point for me was in Lilo and Stitch. Devil in Disguise became one of my favorites strictly because of that film lol. And then in junior high i had a friend who's step dad was literally obsessed with Elvis. Would play his music loudly every single time i went over her house. My nana also would make reference to marrying my grandpa because he looked like Elvis. But my biggest exposure to Elvis was from the Baz film of course. So he's been around me for a long time, but I never took it too far until this film.

•And what was your first impression? I thought Elvis was nothing more than a gimmick. He's been so overly parodied in his life and in death that I grew to roll my eyes at those "uh huhhh thank ya very much lil mama" type of deals y'know. I was like ugh please...I saw him as very novelty and I never saw past those parodies.

•Lace shirts or jumpsuits? Oooh come on now!! Lace shirts are so slutty but honestly, those jumpsuits get me hot under the collar.

•You can steal one of Elvis/Austin’s outfits, what’s it going to be? Im assuming this is in the context of stealing an outfit so i can wear it. Since I can't choose just one i'll give 2, one for Elvis and one for Austin

There's something about this outfit that I know I could rock if i could alter it to my body. maybe make the trousers into hot pants lol. tie the shirt up. but yeah i love this one

and then one for austin. lace and pink with black is a killer combo

•C’mon, we know you’ve been watching/reading old interviews and random footage of the man, so what’s your favorite random Elvis quote? Lol you're so right though lol. Honestly though that man has waaaaay too many perfect quips and funny one liners. Like...i'd have to do a whole dissertation on my favorite Elvis jokes. But this one is fresh in my mind...i rewatched Aloha From Hawaii last night and when he's singing Suspicious Minds he leans down into his deep side lunge and sings "I hope this suit don't tear up baby". I fucking died

•Did you find Austin Butler’s lips distracting despite them being in a movie about the King of plush upper lips? (Be honest now) LOL. sis yes, like the man has such plump lips i just wanna kiss them. i've got big full lips too but i think his are even bigger than mine lol

•What’s an aspect of Elvis’ character you wish more people appreciated? HIS HUMOR *i scream into the void*. the man had a wicked sense of humor like...people need to see it. But also his generosity.

•You meet Col. Tom Parker for the first time, forewarned with the knowledge of what a scumbag he is, what do you do?: A. nothing, you’re a coward who doesn’t care about abused golden-hearted men B. you give the Colonel a stern telling off C. you encourage Elvis to leave him and break the contract E. you slap a legal document against that fat suit and declare “Mrs. Claus is bringing you a lawsuit” F. you waste no time with formalities, it’s a letter opener to the juggler for that piece of trash HAHAHA wow all of these are such great answers but i think the one i would genuinely pick if i had the power to go back in time and do this...would be option C. I would be like Elvis baby...the man has gots to go i beg of you. I think in my delusional mind he'd listen to me. ain't nothin gonna work if i talk to the Colonel himself except maybe if i give him a firm slap across the mouth

•What was your favorite aspect/scene from the Elvis 2022 movie? i have so many but i really love the Vegas Rehearsal scene. It's so so so good and so hot. like goddamn who told Austin he could be that hot and authoritative

•You can choose only one song or piece of media to convince someone to become an Elvis fan, what is it going to be? that's really hard because i have to think of this practically. if i show someone one of Elvis's many films, i don't think that would do the trick. it would be too cheesy for a non-fan. And then the 68 Comeback Special is a good option however with all the musical numbers in there i again don't think that would 100% win a non-fan over without context.

I would probably show them the That's The Way It Is film doc that shows funny rehearsal footage and then the live concert from 1970. It's perfect because it shows Elvis's dedication to the musical arrangements, his humor, and his talent.

•How many children would you give Elvis Presley from your own -or theoretical- womb? (listen to the beast in ya, your feminism won’t serve you here) I genuinely am terrified of the idea of pregnancy and labor because im not about pain and suffering with a changing body for 9 months. But for Elvis...damn i'd give him maybe like 2-3 kids. But this is a hard question because we know the man wasn't a fan of women who gave birth/had children soooo...if I could give him children and he'd still want to fuck me then thats a win Lol.

•Where are you hanging out with EP, his bedroom with the teddy bears, Club Handy, his private jet or Graceland? oooooh...Club Handy sounds perfect. He can let himself be as free as he wants and we can dirty dance to all the amazing music. Then we can kick it in Graceland ;)

•What is the peak Elvis era? warning, this says an awful lot about you… here I go! 68-72. he was *chefs kiss*

•How long have you been an Austin Butler fan (be honest now, God is watching) okay this is so funny to me because obviously i knew nothing about him or his existence until this film. HOWEVER...the man has been in all of my tween sitcoms. Like, i had a massive crush on him from iCarly and Zoey101. that blew my mind when i found that out.

•What kind of Elvis chick are you? -a 1950’s prospective wife material that he’s already sampled, a 1960’s filmset fling or a Vegas torrid backstage affair? oh fuck. hmmmm this is so hard. im torn between 50s prospective wife (because this was in his early days and i could get with him earlier before cilla and any Colonel dramas) and Vegas affair (it would be fucking hot and dirty and im weak thinking about it). if I choose Vegas affair i don't really want a drugged out Elvis, but thats the risk i take by being a slut for the guy. soooo...also my toxic trait tells me that i could fix him in his Vegas years LOL.

•Is Austin Butler an honorary southerner now? Answer options: A. hell no, California can keep his sweet cheeks. B. hell yes, he’s practically been possessed by the soul of the King of the South option B. my Cali man has been blessed with the southern soul

•Pick your poison in the fan-fiction realm: angst, fluff, smut, fluffy smut, angsty fluff, angsty smut?…or is reading about Elvis Presley an acknowledged health hazard? SMUT. all the way.

•Spit or swallow for this man? (And if you don’t understand this question move right along) fucking listen...swallow. i usually would be a spitter because i've had some dank guys in the past that give me the chills thinking about it, so im traumatized Lol. but for Elvis, i'd swallow.

•Would Gladys approve of you? Take your above answer into consideration I hope she would! I mean i'm a nice girl I would try to talk with her and listen to her concerns and make sure she's okay. Let her know i'd be there for her son. I think she'd like me. I ain't a hussy (in public anyway ;) )

•Which of Elvis’ cars is your favorite? pink cadillac

•What are your odds for besting this man at karate? omg he'd whoop my ass. i took karate as a kid and i only made it as far as purple belt. he could dominate me any time of day

•If you could meet Elvis and have enough composure to tell him something, what would it be? I would probably pour my heart out to him and make sure he believed that we loved him and his legacy would impact the entire world for generations to come. like, i need him to seriously understand how important he was.

•What’s a hobby or pastime of yours you wish you could share with Elvis/Austin!Elvis well I already love music and collecting vinyl, so i would have seriously loved to have talked music with Elvis. listen to some records and dance or something.

•What’s the Elvis 2022 quote you’ve been mumbling to yourself ever since you heard it? "You Blood-suckin ol' Vampire. You bleed me dry and yet you still want more?!" is so fun to say. And i also say "I've always wanted to fly".

•What are your top 3 go-to Elvis songs? my answers today are Polk Salad Annie, Heartbreak Hotel, Power of My Love

•If you could spare him one tragedy what would it be? the death of his mother. I think he would be a drastically different person, in a good way, if she wasn't dead.

•Is there a modern artist that sorta scratches for you the itch that Elvis’ absence leaves? absolutely not. Elvis is always there and no other modern or past artist could compete with what he did. ain't no way.

•How did you react at the end of the movie when In the Ghetto started to play A. I got up and fixed a snack because I have no soul, B. I left feeling alarmingly horny, C. I was impressed but didn’t realize how affected I was until days later when it was still with me D. I cried buckets they had to bring in a mop E. I may have appeared emotionless but in fact my soul was leaving my body and I don’t think it’s returned quite yet option E lol

•If you’ve got a favorite gif or photo insert it here and bless us all

this one is definitely top tier.

[theyarebothgunshot]

ROSE I AM FREAKING OUT HAVE YOU SEEN THE PREQUEL STUFF???? WHAT IS GOING ON, my god... I was literally about to go to sleep, decided to check Tumblr one last time and see this.... what WHAT!! WHATTTT!!!!!! I don't even know if this is good bad or what but just JENSEN IS PRODUCING A SUPERNATURAL PREQUEL AND DEAN'S GONNA BE THE NARRATOR OR Sth LIKE???? -🐸

YEAH i am normal about this <3 (jk i am also freaking out) welcome to: people screaming to me in my inbox about prequelgate ft. j/2 fallout theory. let's goooo!

Another copypasta and suddenly chaos machine is full on gay I love this prophecy

you know whats funny i just checked the j/2 tag and i feel like for the first time in a long time they are starting to realise that maybe THEY should be the ones who are "gutted" *sips tea*

ROSE HOLY SHIT ROOOOOOOOSE ITS HAPPENING HOLY SHIIIIIT

YEAH

Nevermind just read prequel and well good luck I guess but just you know kind of bleh who wants to watch John Winchester well let’s have hope anyways

i know a lot of people are bummed out but i am kind of very excited actually?? i trust robbie and even though yeah j*hn winchester turned into a nasty abusive bastard, it can be interesting to explore how it all started (imo). it's just the first of many stories they can tell.

I can only accept this circus if it’s Dean telling the stories to his and Cas’ kids and then we have a revival to show that the whole finale was in fact the end Chuck wanted there Jensen I fixed it

i would not say no to this

heyloo bee anon here

um- wtf is happening?

jackles prequel series?? why? i want to be excited about this but sheesh im scared

because supernatural is never dead <3

okay, but, jensen... john winchester ≠ jdm, you don’t have to go /that/ hard for him 🙃

true true... though i am waiting for jdm to comment on this, please i need it

WAIT A SECOND J2 FALLOUT THEORY TRUE??

LMAO HELL YEAH BESTIE

Rose you really picked the worst time to sleep for real

bestie it was literally 4 in the morning, what do you expect from me sdfjsfhsf

I can’t literally can’t we were all right LMAO j2 fallout theory is real and cockles (Misha supporting Jensen) is [gunshots] I’m just laughing cause what the hell is this timeline we’re living LMAOOOOOOOOOO

we would always end up here <3

Do we have the copypaste anons to thank for JP basically confirming the J2 fallout? lol 🦚

yes, everybody say 'thanks annoying idiots!'

ROSE, WAKE UP, COME HERE,

THERE'S A LOT GOING ON FFS

YEAH I KNOW BUT I NEEDED SLEEP

Anticipating that there's going to be a lot of yelling about the prequel on here: I am cackling, but also, I mean, the first time Dean got a look into his parent's past, Cas was the catalyst: literally entered Dean's mind and catapulted him to the 70s. So idk, it's not completely unreasonable to expect some Cas cameos, maybe setting up a parallel timeline since Dean is narrating. What I'm saying is, this is Jackles, he's getting JDM and Misha in on this lmao -Honeymoon Anon

you were right lmfaooo also i fully agree. misha's tweet further cemented that thought for me. he knew about this prequel and i dont think he is cas-baiting us, i think he'll be involved. i'd also be obsessed to see jensen and jdm act together again (though idk who jdm could play seeing as it's a prequel and he is way too old to play young j*hn)

longlivethetribbles heeft gevraagd:

Heyyyyyy bestie, are you SEEING the absolute madness going on right now holy shit

well a little late but I SURE AM BESTIE

bestie wake up pls s16 finale just dropped.

- 🍯

and WHAT a great one it was

I love coming home from work to see all of the chaos unfolding on Tumblr and Twitter. I'm absolutely buzzing right now. I'll probably still be here by the time you wake up and check tumblr 😂 - 🐢

lmaooo and were you still awake?? did you see my freak out??

Oooh bestie wake the fuck up, I know you’re gonna be excited for this one jsnsjsj

god i had SUCH a morning like. it's 12:00 now and all i did since i woke up is check tumblr rip

short summary: jen and dee gain the rights, they post on ig/twitter about a prequel ft john and mary that no one asked for, the fandom loses its everloving shit as usual, they trend on twitter thanks to the beloved twt intern who missed us, misha qt’s jen about cas possibly benefiting from being in the prequel, then j*red qt’s jensen abt how his feelings got hurt by him not being told about a prequel his character as no involvement in & he initially throws a tantrum, and the rest is history - 🦋 anon (ps: i hope this helps a little, i’ve been scattered brained trying to keep up with it all night lmao so pls let me know if i missed anything, bug crew !!)

thank you so much darling i figured it out eventually but this is a helpful summary!!!

I hope you enjoyed waking up to all of this XD -🐢

i sure did!!! also that answers my question about you being awake lmao

I WILL NEVER EVER EVER FORGIVE MYSELF FOR SLEEPING THROUGH ALL OF THIS DRAMA AND NOT EXPERIENCING IT IN PERSON I DIDN'T NEED THIS SLEEP - tea anon

well the party was still going strong this morning so im not TOO "gutted" see what i did there lmaooo

Now that you are caught up with the news... So idk if you remember this but...didn't jarpad tell jackles he was up for a reboot in an online panel? And jackles answered that this was news to him??

-🍯

yeah i think you are right but he was clearly joking and didnt expect jackles to actually be working on something already

J2 anon spare more of those anons let's finish this - tea anon

please, we're having a ball in this bitch

I saw a post on tumblr where someone said now that Kripke gave J&D the rights, maybe they’re starting with a prequel just to end on a reboot in years time and honestly ? I wanna believe that so badly. This is tinhatty but what if this is all calculated in a way that makes it so that Jensen is slowly starting to fix everything that was wrong with spn - now that he has the rights and he’s slowly making spn his own story ?! I mean he did say in his ig post he wants to ‘fill in the rest’ - and maybe Mary and John’s story is only the beginning of spn related content from J&D to come ??? Maybe he wants to give spn the justice it deserves ?? Thoughts ??

i dont think this is tinhatty at all i think this is very possible and not that much of a reach. i could see this happening yeah for sure

want to hear something funny. I found out I had a ruptured blood vessel in my eye because I was sending my friend a video freaking out when the prequel news dropped and I noticed the corner of my eye was red af. and when I got back online jared had tweeted.

DJFHSJD ANON THE CHAOS OF IT ALL, HELP, are you okay? <3

rose.. bestie... how are you feeling about The News? nsfshsf being european is a curse </3 🐞

i feel GREAT im living for it i feel on top of the world tbh (and yeah it really is dsjfhs)

What am I waking up to I can't WHAT I rested my eyes for like 5 minutes help *hits reblog button* - anon anon

yep yep essentially djfhs

“Jensen and Misha are Co workers who barley talk”

I can’t be sure of course but I’m fairly certain that this is the copypasta that brought the j/2 fallout theory back to life. Who’s apparently ‘barely talking’ now? skansjsjsj. It’s almost prophetic, these j/2 anons have superpowers I’m telling ya.

-poker face anon

next time we get one of them we should be thanking them lmaooo

ok, but are we gonna talk about the "When Daneel and I formed Chaos Machine Productions, we knew that the first story we wanted to tell was the story of John and Mary Winchester [...]"-quote because the way this is phrased implies they formed CHAOS MACHINE Productions with the intent of telling this story (first), i haven't been in this dumpster long enough but the name just tickles me in that Misha way, isn't it so sus??? am i missing something???? i mean with this announcement they SURE lived up to that name... 🧩-anon

you are absolutely right, chaos machine SCREAMS misha and we are all here for it!!

hey hey hey. joining the clownverse, there's no way THEE cas girl danneel doesn't know just how much the fandom loves misha and cas. so 2 + 2 = misha in the spn prequel!

AGREED

So I think I finally managed to catch up on wtf happened while I was asleep and my brain melted. What a shit show to wake up to.

Anyway thoughts.

I don't hate the idea of a Mary&John sequel. I think it has the potential to be good (It has the potential to be really bad too, so I'm kind scared).

🕯️🕯️🕯️ manifesting Mary being badass and John being kinda useless🕯️🕯️🕯️

As for the Jensen and J*red thing.

I can see Jensen not telling J*red even if they are still friends, because J*red is kinda good at accidentally telling Secrets. He could have told him right before he announced it so, so that J*red didn't have to find out from twitter. He was on the show for 15 years, he is bound to get asked about it. The public twitter meltdown was really unprofessional so. Like you have Jensen's number J*red. You could have sorted that out in private like a normal person, but instead you choose to act like a toddler throwing a tantrum.

Is it weird that I'm actually going to be kinda that for them if the actually had a falling out, even tho I don't like J*red all that much. They seemed to be really important to each other and while I thought before that the might have triefted apart a bit, I didn't think that the where actively fighting.

- 🐌 anon

the thing is, the polite/normal thing for jensen to do was text him before announcing it on twitter. it's weird he didn't, and that makes me believe that maybe yeah they did have a falling out. especially with the way j*red responded to it on twitter. if he had no other reason to be this upset (no prior beef or falling out) you'd think that he wouldn't be responding like this. on the other hand, the man is a mysterie to me so who the hell knows. i'm not gonna mourn about it if they did/do grow apart because j*red is just.... awful imo.

[normal-thoughts-official]

Oooh yeah the first time I was playing as a female mc because I wanted to romance ava and I usually go male mc if I want to romance a man and female mc if I want to romance a woman (and I think there was one book with where mc could be non-binary so I picked that one but I didn't finished the book), and Stacy's brother felt Hetero™ in a way, like Hollywood ish (? Honestly like cinematographicly bad hetero) but I ended up really loving Andy too, and Stacy felt a little flat but also I really liked her potential, like go crazy girl, and the mom issues.

Apart but holy shit you're 10000% right about that teacher like who inmediately threatens expulsion just like that for something not violent ??? And to an honor student with way too much on his plate ??? Obviously it would have been bad with any student, but you have literally the reason of why he's doing it and as a teacher HE LITERALLY COULD HAVE HELPED WITH IT ??????? Like something teachers can't really help students because it's a family thing only or is a financial struggle or etc but it was literally because of school (and his family, but the teacher could have heloed him with the school part)

(Identity thief anon (also I go by any pronouns ahhshs))

ur valid! that's lowkey what i wish i'd do (picking female MC if my fave LI is female and the other way around, i mean) but unfortunately i always go into the stories blindly having no idea what i'll find </3 so i cant really do that doiajdiosa and then i get attached for the MC i picked so i feel bad about changing their gender/name/appearance when i replay. so what i usually do is that i pick a male MC when i get the option because A- u don't always get the option, so i end up being male half the time and female half the time either way; and B- i feel slightly more comfortable with a male identity than a female one. like i'm still nonbinary and i wouldn't consider myself male aligned or within the gender of Man, but like... when i first came out i went by any pronouns but then because im afab everyone was like "cool, she/her only it is" so i was like fuck that and stopped using she/her. so i feel slightly more comfortable with a masc MC and end up going with that

there's also the fact that it always feels slightly genderfucky to have a male MC because choices is so sexist and also always writes the stories assuming ull pick a female MC, even when they give u the option not to. so when u pick a male MC he's very like not toxically masc and some things they add to make a QuiRkY MC that are very white woman and would feel annoying are actually kind of subversive for my black and brown male MCs. so like another win for queerness /j

ILITW MC in particular i feel has HUGE nonbinary vibes like no reason at all he just does <3 maybe it's just that for once the male clothes for ILITW actually fUCK. i wanna dress in that goth outfit <3 so gorgeous ugh. i love him even tho he's a fucking dumbass

also there's a book where an MC can be enby? worm? ive only ever read one book in choices with any enby characters at all (america's most elligible, books 2-3) but they weren't even a LI which is disappointing cuz they were a billion times superior to any of the LIs. sorry america's most elligible LIs fans

also oh connor IS the epitome of white cistraight man even when u play as a man tbh, like he was just so cistraight to me daouhdsaojdasij he kind of annoys me but also i forget that he even exists until he shows up onscreen and choices starts trying to push me into his lap and i'm just like, ugh, not again

and yeah i think i feel a similar way about stacy. i don't dislike her as a character and i don't feel like she as a character felt flat, her growth was very interesting and i loved seeing her start to challenge her mom like YESSS GO GIRL GIVE US EVERYTHING, she just felt flat as a LI to me ig? like idk i didn't feel chemistry between her and my MC personally, but also like, stacy girls are valid u know

right exactly. like i don't think ppl really understand that a school that doesn't drive people to cry during finals week and feel absolutely crushed by having to be there and that makes ppl feel like they're stupid, not enough, and overwhelmed IS IN FACT POSSIBLE and actually pretty easy to make when we stop treating students like statistics that will get the school more clients/funding (depending on whether it's a private or public school). and like as a teacher getting my degree in brasil it just feels completely surreal to me that anyone would see a student who's so overwhelmed by the amount of extracurriculars and responsibilities he feels like he has to take that he starts taking drugs to help his performance despite it affecting his health, and see that as like... something morally reprehensible? like it is bad that it happened but it's not the student's fault, what's morally reprehensible are the circumstances that led to his decision, not his decision

and like it is very much a systemic problem, more and more kids are taking focus pills to be able to survive the pressure of school and have a shot at a future, either on their own or because we are actually medicalizing not existing to be productive. and if it's a systemic problem then the fault is at the system?? and like holy shit i legit don't understand why choices gave us options like being like "it still isn't enough" when lucas gets rid of his pills, what do you mean it isn't enough??? enough for what??? to FORGIVE him???? for something that only hurt himself??? for something that is very much a systemic problem and therefore NOT HIS FAULT????? literally what the fuck even is this, lucas doesn't have to "make up" for a single thing, he needs to be HELPED is what he needs

like idk i know that the school system in the US is...... extremely backwards lmao which is not a term i like to use because it usually implies imperialistic views but the US is the height of world imperialism so like actually idc. brasil has a pretty progressive constitution and as a teacher my whole education was focused on being critical of the school system, particularly the productivity obsession, and drilling into us again and again that we aren't supposed to just be teaching subjects, we are also supposed to be teaching how to be a citizen, be a critical human being, work towards building a better future, and learning and growing AS A PERSON to be healthy and happy are values of the school system

like that's easier said than done when schools are under insane amounts of pressure by companies in practice to be productivity-driven, and most teachers who actually want to do a good job end up having to live at the edge of the knife and constantly fighting back outside pressure, but at least it is very much a mandatory part of our education to become teachers and also like literally part of the constitution. so i just... i can't fathom reacting the way mr cooper did? like as a teacher i felt BETRAYED, i felt like he shat all over my profession because that is the opposite of what we should be doing, this is a kid who needs help

and just like hOLY SHIT HE DID NOTHING WRONG, what are you punishing him for??? it's not even a like, stealing bread to feed your family situation, because what he did HAS NO VICTIM OTHER THAN HIMSELF, and therefore HE IS THE VICTIM NOT THE CULPRIT. he doesn't have to repent or atone or answer for a single fucking thing, he didn't victimize others, he doesn't have to apologize, there's nothing to punish him fOR??? like i don't believe in punishment anyway cuz im a prison abolitionist but doDAUSDJADASIJDAS???????????? HE DIDN'T. HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG. WHY IS THIS WHOLE GAME ACTING AS IF HE WAS IN THE WRONG. OH MY GOD

it's like saying that someone needs to be forgiven for self harming????? like how is it that someone has been hurt continuously until it led them to hurt themselves and then they have to? make up for it to a bunch of other ppl? my god it makes me so mad and i genuinely don't understand the logic, like usually when i see someone doing fucked up shit i can see the logic but i don't agree with it, but this time i genuinely DON'T SEE THE LOGIC. my USan friends said it was because he was technically doing drugs but like i legit still don't understand

anyway any school that drives a student to do something like that needs to rethink their entire curriculum and the psychological effect it's having on kids, because lucas is 1- not even the first one according to mr cooper; 2- even if he was, that'd be the only one who got CAUGHT; and 3- even if there was really only one singular student who went tHIS far, i doubt the others weren't feeling that same pressure and dealing with it in other similarly unhealthy ways

i know that's probably easier in brasil than in the US even if it's by no means easy here because here at least in public schools the curriculum and political-pedagogical plan has to be agreed on by the school community (teachers, parents, students, workers, and anyone who lives in the area of the school) and it's updated every year, so like, you have more means to do something to change the school in a deeper way, altho of course that still has to mean swinging the rest of the community, but still. but at the very least he could have looked for counseling for him? tried to find a way to take some of the workload off his shoulders? given him some more time on assignments? motioning for all the clubs he was the president of to have co-presidents so he was less overwhelmed?

like there was just daodsao he could have done so many things and he justs DIDN'T he chose to not only punish him instead but quite literally THREATEN HIM WITH DEATH because that's what calling the police on a latino student over a drug charge is. like he might've survived but the possibility that he would fucking DIE was very much there, and i know choices didn't think of that because they'd rather die than think about the racial implications of anything but holy fucking shit. and im not even getting into how mr cooper is BLACK because then ill just start biting people like thanks for putting that threat on a black character's mouth choices. if u need me ill be foaming at the mouth

anyway SORRY god why is it that i always get to the salty part within 2 seconds of joining a fandom i promise that i actually like it lives and the way they handled most of their plot, i genuinely think it's a very well written and actually worth ur time story but i just doadosaida like i said particularly as a teacher in the context where i'm being taught, plus with all my political beliefs, i just can't let it go aaaa

also ty for telling me ur pronouns! idk if i assumed them at any time, i don't think so but i might have done so without realizing and if i did im really sorry. also sorry for the gigantic salty reply daojdsaojdaisjsajdoadsaodasj rip me i never shut up

[shrinkthisviolet]

Author Interview Tag!

Tagged by @maipreciation, thanks for thinking of me! This looks really fun :D

(Note: I’m keeping this as a running list, so if you’re ever wondering what fics im working on/brainstorming, make sure to check here! Last update was on 12/12/2020)

Name: Lavi! As of 12/5, I’m no longer going by my real name (see this post)

Fandoms: so many 😂 check my bio, I think I have them all listed. I’ve posted fic for Hamilton and ATLA, and then there was a huge Inktober compilation I posted last year with a whole host of fandoms. Currently, my major fandom is ATLA, and probably Kipo as I’m starting to move through S1

Where you post: I have an AO3 (lavi0123)! I used to have an FFN and a Wattpad, but I don’t use either of those anymore :/ tbh, I’m embarrassed of anything I still have up there ����

Most popular one-shot: Most definitely we’ll give the world to you (and you’ll blow us all away), one of my contributions to Maiko Week! I’m not surprised it’s an ATLA fic, but I find it interesting that a fic with Izumi in it blew up so quickly. But hey, if y’all want more Izumi content, you won’t be disappointed 😉

Most popular multi-chapter fic: ...I’m really embarrassed to say because I don’t think I’ll ever finish it...but En Hamilton Heights is the only multichap fic I’ve published so it’s gotta be that one 😂 hopefully soon I’ll have another fic to add to that, since I’m working on one (sorry EHH fans but it’s been too long and tbh I don’t remember where I was going with it :/ I’m thinking I might orphan it)

Favorite story you’ve written so far: you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong) for sure! It’s super niche but it’s something I wrote out of love for a movie I discovered this Halloween and absolutely love. Though all you’ve got to do is want something (and then let yourself have it) is a close second. Basically, anything I write that sounds absolutely bonkers as a concept is one that I love 😂 (and it’s no coincidence that both fics are Mai-centric! I love all my Mai-centric fics nearly equally)

Fic you were nervous to post: Is there an “all of the above” option? 😂 I’m always nervous to post. But in particular, I was nervous for if you ran away (come back home), because it was Mai-centric and longer than any one-shot I’d written thus far, and also you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong), because it’s Mai-centric and a Coraline AU, which makes it BONKERS as an idea

Why was I nervous to post Mai-centric fics, you ask? Two reasons: 1) Mai is very different from who I am as a person (I vibe a lot more with Aang and Ty Lee, sometimes Katara and Sokka), so I didn’t want to upset the Mai stans by writing her incorrectly. 2) Mai is generally not well-liked in the fandom at large, so I especially didn’t want to attract antis who would accuse me of writing Mai as too emotional and loving (which is why I tried to justify that in my tags). Luckily, my comments have all been lovely, and I’m far less afraid to post fics about her now that I’ve written three fics with her as the focus! And the shoutout from @nonbinary-crafter-aang praising my portrayal of her?? I was touched 🥺 still am

How you choose your titles: Song lyrics or movie/book lines that speak to me, occasionally a pun. Remember that post I rb’d about how authors title their works? My tags pretty much say it all 😂

Do you outline: Ehh...define outlining 😂 for my one-shots, nope. But for my upcoming multichap works (see below) and Nanowrimo work (original fiction, so I won’t talk about it on here, but send an ask if you’re curious), YES ABSOLUTELY!

For my Nanowrimo work and one of my upcoming AUs (a Soulmate AU), the worldbuilding is so complex that it’s an absolute necessity. For the other upcoming AU (a time travel AU), there are just too many things that need to happen at certain times so as not to interfere with canon events, and things I want to change from canon and things I want to keep...I think you get the idea 😂

Complete: Basically my entire maiko halloweek series! Check it out if you want some fics about the most underrated canon ATLA couple :)

In-progress: ...En Hamilton Heights again...but not for long, sadly. Still trying to decide between a quick conclusion and just flat-out orphaning it. Still haven’t made up my mind, but either way, it won’t be what I originally planned, unfortunately.

I’m also counting my ATLA Soulmate AU on the basis of forever in my mind (only you), which has the worldbuilding and fits into the AU without much problem (the AU is going to be a series of one-shots, not a multichap fic, because there won’t be enough deviations from canon imo to justify multiple chapters. And one-shots are just less pressure for me 😂)

[EDIT 12/12/2020: added another fic because I’m an idiot and forgot about this too 🤦‍♀️😂 it’s a year-old idea that I started writing but I’m picking it back up thanks to the Heist banter in MatPat’s St Jude stream!]

-A fic series combining Escape the Night and Who Killed Markiplier (Heist and Date are part of it too, but only tangentially at the moment. Depends on how involved I want DA Y/N to be). Tentatively titled A Heavy Cost, and definitely won’t happen in any of Mark’s projects, but in a way that’s actually for the best 😂 the canonicity for me stops at ETN S3 (with some S4), then it’s canon divergence

Coming soon/not yet started: OOOH YESSS HERE WE GO

Okay okay sooo we’ve got two main things:

–An ATLA Soulmate AU, featuring platonic and romantic soulmates! I know I called it in-progress, and I stand by that even though I haven’t actually set up the series on AO3 yet, but this AU is about to be SO MUCH MORE than just a few Maiko moments. Because...drum roll...it’s gonna be entirely Aang-centric (with maybe one or two exceptions)! Like Mai, Aang is a character that doesn’t get as many -centric fics as he should (and being an Aang stan also isn’t unanimous for some reason??), so I’m gonna fix that. Plus I want to dive further into his mind, and I think I’m more equipped to do that than I was with Mai, since Aang and I are very similar in attitude.

–Bumizumi time travel AU, which can be read as platonic until the last couple chapters (it’ll be multichap) but definitely has a romantic agenda throughout. So just. Be warned if you don’t ship them. It’s gonna be chock full of comedy and antics! Also A LOT of platonic affection between Izumi and teen Zuko (and just between Izumi, Bumi, and the Gaang in general), because platonic affection is underrated and also I can :D I’m also probably gonna make fun of how some elements of affection have become solely romantic territory, because...um, no, hugging and holding hands and cuddling can be done between friends, thanks! (Maybe it’s the ace in me talking. But regardless)

There are also vague concepts I’m spitballing, like:

-Zukaang telepathy AU (Platonic Zukaang, the only romance I’ll ever write in ATLA is for the canon ships, prompted by a dream because apparently ATLA lives in my head rent-free forever now 😂)

-Evil Zuko AU (Azula doesn’t exist, mostly prompted after watching Aang make fun of Zhao and realizing that if Zuko had been in any position of power during the War...the Gaang would have stood no chance at all)

-Bumizumi Arranged Marriage AU (Bumi and Izumi both think the other is hotheaded/reckless (Izumi @ Bumi) or uptight (Bumi @ Izumi). So Kataang and Maiko (along with Sukka, Ty Lee, and Toph because...duh) set them up in an arranged marriage, with the presented reasoning being that they already know each other’s families, it’ll be a great symbol of unity, and this way Izumi doesn’t have to worry about suitors. They both agree to it (it’s arranged, not forced), and over time, they warm up to each other...and maybe even...fall in love?? Prompted because we need more arranged marriage fics! On that note, I’m gonna plug shadows and steel by @dearestpartnerofgreatness because arranged marriage needs more rep and this fic does it and with Maiko to boot!)

-Zukaang as Brothers AU (I saw a fic about this, but it wasn’t complete. If it’s not done by the time I get to this concept, I’m gonna write it, because just...imagine the possibilities! Zuko and Aang are already basically brothers in canon anyway, this is just making them brothers in blood as well as in their hearts. This is especially vague because I have no concept of how this is gonna work 🤷‍♀️ I’ll get to it eventually)

(Can you tell I’m obsessed with Zuko and Aang’s friendship? Because I am!)

[EDIT 11/25/2020: I’m adding two more because I forgot these have been swirling around in my head too 😂]

-A fix-it fic based on May You Always Be Satisfied, a backstory fic for Who Killed Markiplier by @blackaquokat! I recently reread it and remembered that I was gonna write a fix-it for that fic. Not because the fic sucks, it’s actually amazing! I’m just a sucker for the main (requited unrequited) pairing, and there’s at least five ways to make that pairing canon and avoid the mess of Who Killed Markiplier. And THEY ALL DESERVE TO BE HAPPY OKAY

-A Finnrey fix-it for the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy (this one is especially vague, and I probably won’t write it since a bunch of these already exist, but it’s fun to think about. Maybe if I ever run out of WIPs 🤷‍♀️)

Upcoming story that you’re most excited to write: I’m equally excited for the Soulmate AU and the Bumizumi Time Travel AU! I’m also excited for my Nanowrimo work to be finished, but that’s more so in-progress than upcoming

Tagging:

@nonbinary-crafter-aang @dearestpartnerofgreatness @ohsalamanders @blackaquokat (no pressure ofc, only if you want to! But please tag me if you do, I’d love to see it!)

[gracefulweather]

pls why did tumblr put the pic in such a weird place lol 😭 i was seriously laughing so hard he was really holding it for dear life

omg yes i have !! i love alice in borderland ! i wish it got the same hype as squid game is bc it's so good !! and the games omg 😨 seriously was on the edge of my seat the whole show ! like the bus one was insane :O i hated how they left it on a cliffhanger but i saw its getting renewed for s2 :D i was really obsessed w it when i first watched, i looked up all of the character profiles and how it differed from the manga + future games and the ending but i still have so many unanswered questions 👀

i love psychological thrillers and shows like those ! wbu???

haha yes 😭 txt really made a whole short film lol

yes 😭 i saw those comparisons and how ppl were bringing up what sunwoo said abt the character comparisons to the members and im ready for PAIN 🥲

cinematic mvs >>>>

drink it halloween dance practice would have been spectacular :")

i don't really collect pcs ,,, idk i just get the ones that come w the albums and put them in a lil card organizer lol but i've never traded or bought any wo an album

omg no 😭😭😭 i hate when things sell out so quickly

haha we love that ! they're all so lovable tbh, it's hard to chose a bias 🥺

yeah ! i am a sunwoo enjoyer :D & my bias wrecker has gotta be eric 🙃 he is constantly coming for my throat..heh when did u start stanning?

THE HIGHLIGHT MEDLEY 😭😭😭 WAS SO GOOD ! as soon as the announcer thing came on i was so happy, they're really going all out ! haha omg 😂 maverick is definitely an intense lil song but i feel like i alr love it ! yes the songs all sound so nice n spicy i'm so ready

LMAOOO tumblr putting the pic there makes it even funnier :') died laughing ngl. and ikr borderland was so good, though i feel like it was a little too scary for it to have the hype factor? oh i totally forgot about the bus one until you mentioned it!! yeah that was so intense... omg also the one with the hanging electric pole things with rising water?? oooh i'll have to check out the manga but yeah hopefully s2 gives us all the answers (unless netflix chooses to drag it out... knowing them, that might happen 😭). and YES!! i also love psychological thrillers!!!! not so much straight up horror, but i love suspense and mind games 😍 do you have any faves or recs?

we're all ready for pain :') and at the same time tbz be playing red light green light in such a cute and funny way in their mcountdown teaser?? they're gonna give us whiplash from this :')))

ohh i see, yeah i heard that sunwoo was one of the umm expensive/sold out pc members LOL but i hope you pull him if you do decide to get the album!!!

maknae line!! eric has been... very bold lately so i hope u survive this comeback hehe. i started stanning towards the end of last year!! i was eyeing them during stealer era but their MAMA 2020 performance convinced me 😍 wbu!! and who are ur biases from the other groups you stan?

yeah omg the chanting in maverick is kinda catchy!! i can see myself looping it until i'm numb 🤡 ALSO MV TEASER??? THOUGHTS? i thought the other one counted as mv teaser already so definitely didn't expect this one, but hopefully it's a sign that we're getting like a full on story and plot and everything 🤩

[imbellarosa]

thanks to the inimitable @cowboylarries (<3 <3) for the tag i LOVE these games (lmao look at me im OBSESSED with myselffff) 

rules: answer 20 questions, then tag 20 bloggers you want to get to know better

1. name: Bella 

2. nickname: technically Bella IS a nickname but my family calls me Yeya or Jay...some friends have called me Bells before? That counts! 

3. zodiac sign: Gemini

4. height: 5’7

5. languages: english, spanish, proficient french and some ASL 

6. nationality: American

7. favorite season: Fall

8. favorite flower: roses or sunflowers 

9. favorite scent: the ocean

10. favorite color: blue or red or a deep forest green or pastel yellow...a LOT clearly! 

11. favorite animal: hey I’m a big fan of bees too! or cats or birds! 

12. favorite fictional character(s): hmmmmmm too many? my fav book is Aristotle and Dante so both of them, then Quentin Coldwater from the Magicians, and also Dean from spn and Emma Swan from OUAT and Nile from the Old Guard and and Crowley and Aziriphale from Good Omens and most any version of Sherlock Holmes and John Watson (but Lucy Liu might be my fav here). oooh! idk give me a badass woman who stands her own and i’m gonna be in love with her

13. coffee, tea, or hot chocolate?: coffee!!!!!

14. average hours of sleep: 6-8 hours i think?? 

15. dog or cat person?: catsssssss...mine is my BABY

16. number of blankets you sleep with: one duvet and two smaller fuzzy blankets because my feet are always cold.

17. dream trip: hmmmm i got asked this last month and i said El Salvador but now i’m IN EL SALVADOR RN can you BELIEVE!!! And before that I would have said in Brussels with @belgianreader2 and @asmicarus but i’ll BE THERE IN FIVE MONTHS!!! So idk maybe I’ll say Amsterdam w @dependsonwhospitching bc we’re gonna do that in two years we just ARE! 

18. blog established: i’ve had this blog since 2016 i think!! can you BELIEVE?

19. number of followers: enough :)

20. random fact: hmmmm i tell stories really well. Idk why i just have a knack for it! 

okayyy who am i tagging i think @whatagreatproblemtohave @portraitofalarryonfire @lascitateognesperanza @homosociallyyours and anyone else who wants to! 

[jametartt]

interview tag ! ✨

the rules are to answer questions and tag some blogs you are contractually obligated to know better :)

i was tagged by @leondaltons ty flor 💕💕💕 i did this yesterday but on sieblog so i’m doing it again and changing answers to spice things up 💅🏼😂

gender: female

star sign: taurus sun hello im boring chill <3

height: 1.76 m (i swear everytime i convert it i get a different result lmfao it’s either 5′8 or 5′9?)

time currently: 12:20pm

birthday: april 21st

favorite band/group(s): i don’t really have a fave since one direction are no more DJFKS anything classic rock/grunge and pop-rock/pop is cool and,,, i guess,,,,,, BTS,,,,, (flor you are not allowed to say anything.)

favourite solo artist(s): easy peasy it’s hozier <3

song stuck in your head: MIC Drop and that cool wellerman song i keep seeing on dash

last show you binged: bridgerton, but last night i speed-rewatched a couple fairy tail arcs

when you created your blog: oooh i think somewhere in 2013/2014? 

last thing you googled: “how much is 1.76m in feet” ASHJDK does that count? otherwise it’s “jungkook blonde”

other blogs: bobbymckenze (interactive fiction & visual novels), katsukibakougo (animanga), daenyara (writing advice and multifandom fanfiction), darcyelizabeth (just a personal archive, untagged and messy af lmao), fabulaeinteractive (another main; for my original story and characters)

why i chose my URL: i like to change url every so often to reflect my current obsession lmao so yea stan seojun

how many people are you following: 661

how many followers do you have: 818

average hours of sleep: anything between 3 and 10 nkjd normally around 7

lucky number: 13? not lucky, i just think it’s cool

instruments: ik like,, maybe 10 guitar chords. and yeah flute too, i always forget that’s an instrument SDJKFHKJD anyway it was mandatory in school so everyone plays it 😂 i uh guess i’m a decent singer? but i’ve got no range

favourite food: anything with spices or cheese or meet jfgjkg idk right now i’m really in the mood for gobi manchurian but i’m too lazy to fry :/

favourite song: any song from shrek will do

dream trip: anywhere in Asia, don’t care where exactly. and new zealand. and canada. 

what i am currently wearing: sweatpants and a t-shirt and a fluffy robe lolll my lockdown look is sexy ik 

dream job: wife of a rich person <3

nationality: italian

tagging @simplerat @the-canary @capfalcon @benhargrieves @zavens @spiderrpcrker (you don’t have to do it but HI FRIENDS 💖💖💖 hope you’re all doing okay!)

[prismed-tears]

imagine the dr surviving cast watching a mystery movie. they would be the WORST

trigger happy havoc

there's kirigiri who figures it out from the set-up (please. its chock full of cliches.) you don't know when byakuya figures it out, but he's just smirking at random close-ups and snorting snidely. (while he has a good idea, he's definitely just waving his dick around to keep up appearances too). makoto is the absolute worst. he's muttering the entire thing through, practically spoiling the entire movie as they go along.

there's asahina she makes for good audience, she's just vibing and gasping dramatically, giving the right reactions at the right moments. she's also practically strangling makoto lmao. there's hagakure, who makes bizarre and random guesses (conspiracy theorist) that happen to be right like.. twice (actual functioning clairvoyant, surprisingly). he also tries to fall asleep, but makoto is so damn loud. makoto and hagakure are a two-man class trial, them disproving and arguing both of their theories. touko's just there because it's teeeeechnically a date with her beloved white knight, but you bet your ass that she can enjoy good storytelling and plot devices. she's basically cinema sins as she mutters "huh. narration. cheap tactic." kirigiri is silently nodding along, and eventually, they're both discussing the cliches and the utter bullshit in it, lmao. touko doesn't quite figure out the mystery, but she's pointing out plot holes as they go.

makoto eavesdrops and uses it as truth bullets in the makeshift class trial. eventually byakuya joins in, by the halfway point, they're all drowning out the movie completely. asahina's just bummed out and wondering how did they think this was a good idea. kirigiri hasn't officially joined, but she's basically dropping hints to makoto as they go along. touko does the same thing to byakuya. hagakure cries out that it's unfair, he doesn't have a sidekick. kirigiri tries to pry out touko's knowledge of cliches, touko cries out that kirigiri's a traitor for betraying her trust by using their earlier discussion, etc etc.

by the end, asahina's just happy that the characters got what they deserve. kirigiri's right, of course, but hagakure predicts an unforeseen plot twist that's just bad writing in the movie, touko is practically ranting how the fuck did that happen, there were so many plot holes for the twist to happen, but he's right nonetheless. makoto gets it wrong, actual investigation skills doesnt work in a movie, he keeps attempting the movie to apply real life logic. and as for byakuya? he's just smirking and laughing all the way through. is he correct? is he just waving his dick around? that's the real mystery.

goodbye despair

(technically they're all surviving, but i'm just counting the awakened ones at the end of the game, because... that's a lot of people lmao.)

(+ nagito and chiaki because we need actual detectives in here, and they're barely detectives as it is.)

let's start this off with— chiaki is asleep. she's down for the count. hajime keeps trying to wake her up but she's out. that leaves nagito and hajime. hajime is just eyeing/glaring at nagito, nagito knows, he's just 💞😄🖐🍿 as for the actual mystery, hajime actually knows how to keep his mouth shut... for the most part. he's muttering out half-formed syllables at random times, or shaking his head. sometimes, nagito asks him to elaborate, and hajime reluctantly does. when nagito isn't doing that, he's watching the movie, going "huh? but..." which makes hajime go crazy. elaborate. what do you mean. but WHAT. sometimes nagito laughs at random times and hajime's practically boring his eyes into nagito's skull, wondering what the fuck he's thinking. chiaki wakes up at random times, points out random things, hajime's shaking her, what does she mean he didn't quite catch it, but she's already gone. hajime obsesses over the slurred syllable that he heard.

and then there's kazuichi, who... isn't quite following? that's the detective dude, right? what do you mean that it's a common trope in movies? that doesn't make sense, he's working for the police, why is he trying to get arrested— and there's akane, who's just cackling at the dead bodies and hollering at the crime scenes as she wolfs down her popcorn. why aren't you freaked out, fuyuhiko asks. you aren't acting like this in the game, fuyuhiko says. of course akane knows how to differentiate fiction from reality. fuyuhiko understands the sentiment, both of them go apeshit at the crime scenes, fuyuhiko wants the detective to lose because he doesn't like the police much, mafia and all. meanwhile, there's sonia, who already watched 70 other movies with practically the exact same plotline, but she's basically freaking out at every turn. she's ooohing and aaaahing at every plot twist and kazuichi is like. oh PLEASE, he already saw that coming. he stretches his arms very unsubtly, sonia primly stands up and moves ten seats away. you're right, miss sonia, this is a better spot. kazuichi says, appearing out of nowhere. sonia moves away. this is a vicious cycle.

she finds her way eventually to hajime, who's five seconds away from an aneurysm. he's trying to pick the brains of two people while trying to figure out the plot of the movie. nagito looks very strangely pleased. sonia is unfazed, randomly saying that "oh, you know x is actually stole x, right? but that's only one facet of the grand plan, which is currently in motion." hajime's about to cry. thank fuck. an actual conversational partner. they calmly swap theories, kazuichi desperately trying to join in the conversation but he really isn't keeping up. fuyuhiko barges in, basically going what the fuck are you all on, are you saying that this movie is gonna have a happy ending? hell no, it doesn't work like that, fuyuhiko should know. this is what would actually happen—

it's an actual class trial now, akane dropping in and all. she asks for clarifications every once in a while, but she doesn't really care. kazuichi is practically kissing her feet. nagito has gone 💞😄🖐🍿🧏🏼‍♂️👀💞 at this point. fuyuhiko is very much concerned. hajime doesn't see jack shit. what does hajime see, you ask? hajime sees that nagito isn't opening his mouth to share his thoughts. hajime asks him properly. nagito answers with his own question. hajime is about to pop a vein. why does he even bother. sonia calmly says that y is dying. chiaki wakes up. red bracelet. passes out again. hajime shakes her shoulders to no avail. hajime hinata is about to cry. kazuichi, out of all people, tries to calm him down. this makes him feel worse.

sonia is practically a clairvoyant as she predicts what's going to happen 5 seconds before it does. nagito goes 💞😄🖐🍿🧏🏼‍♂️👀💞 😄🖐🍿🧏🏼‍♂️👀💞 does nobody else see this, fuyuhiko says. i do, kazuichi says. they are both unable to do anything. for the very first time in a long while, hajime is blindsided in this mystery, and sonia was about to figure it out before he did. his mind is working on 5x speed now. he knows he shouldnt be competitive. its just a movie. he cant help himself. he find a red bracelet on the assistant detective. sonia doesn't say anything about it. hajime is now unlocking 50% of his brain (not literally. no kamukura in this post lmao, im not gonna put my hands in THAT).

final fight scene as the assistant tries to escape. fuyuhiko is on the top of his lungs, pointing out the many different ways he could knock out the detective. akane's joining with him. kazuichi's just joining in the fun at this point. the mystery gets solved. hajime fucking called it. sonia is genuinely caught off-guard, she was too used to movie tropes, but it's a pleasant surprise. fuyuhiko's just pissed that the detective won. "i didn't see that coming :)!" nagito says. what the fuck are you talking about, hajime says, and all traces of victory are gone. nagito says that he isn't a fan of the mystery genre. hajime's eye is twitching. he knows, deep down, nagito is truthful, but also, why does it feel like bullshit. i called it too miss sonia, kazuichi says. everyone knows that he's lying. sonia suddenly lost the ability to hear. chiaki wakes up. summarizes the case. how the fuck do you know that, you were out cold, hajime says. i was spoiled by a redditor, chiaki says as she blinks the sleep out of her eyes. hajime doesn't feel victorious at all. kazuichi, once again, sympathizes. right before hajime can storm off altogether, fuyuhiko joins in the pity pile, and hajime actually finds the hope to live again. what a hopeful sight, nagito says. no hope here, hajime realizes, just despair. akane is sitting beside 5 empty tubs of popcorn. hajime is half-tempted to shove his head in one.

(sidenote: nagito can probably solve the mystery if he tried but he really doesnt care that much + it was fun to rile hajime up lmao)

[riskeith]

good morning love! (or afternoon for you hehe)

deku vs kacchan part 2 is my favorite ep of the entire series actually. i’ve watch that ep so many times as well it’s just perfect. i got into them when i watched that episode actually! the voice acting god..... literally shivers. now that i think about it it might even be my favorite anime ep of all time help. i just love how bakugou lets it all out and we get to see that side of him.. the insecure scared child he tries to hide. god i could ramble about it forever idk just love it. OH YOU WATCHED THE MOVE RIGHT AFTER? a scene with bakugou and todoroki is guaranteed a good time.. and they work so well together. haha that’s such a nice coincidence tho their dynamic is great in that movie even if it’s mostly kiribaku sjsksjk. what do you think about kiribaku btw?

RIGHT!!! at least we have a couple days to decide hihi.... paimon no longer emergency snack.. only seelie. 🥴 oooh? what kind of thing have you envisioned? (if you wanna share ofc!)

i’ve seen so many people mention that!! like one of the worst parts of the game is that in the higher level you get the less there are to do.. ssjksjdk at some point all you can do is grind domains and try to level up shdkdfhdj

LEVEL 40 INTO A LEVEL 70+ FIGHT ok that’s honestly hilariously brave doesn’t she like die right away 😔 oh yeah you’ll be leveling up Again soon *praying for you*... can’t believe they don’t keep the easy bosses anymore sjdkfh that’s so rude. this game is just grind grind grind. WE NEED A BENNY STORY SO BADLY. like imagine a story with him wanting to seek out diluc because he wants to learn how to fight from a master or something like that. i saw it in a comic and i can’t stop thinking about it 😭 all of them deserve stories!!! there’s so many ways they could make it happen pls mihoyo... chongyun x xingqiu story... <333

shfkjdskdjhf nope right now i’m playing with noelle as my main damage dealer, traveller, lisa and barbara actually. so i think i have a pretty good balance atm.. 2 long range 2 short range-ish. i usually trade out barbara for another character if i have to tho, hehe. that’s only combat though ^ benny is with me when we explore. mood is me having a 5 star and not even using her... i still need to think of ways qiqi could fit into the group yk. is your group still looking the same as before? ooooh if you could rank the elements what would your ranking look like?

172!!!!! that’s a bit short though when you said tall i thought like... 190 or something sjksjdxk. wait how tall are You?

oh i just meant like... people bashing others for spending too much money on the game vs those that bash people for not spending money and complaining that they don’t get 5 star etc? idk yt comments can be so ugly though so it’s a good thing that you don’t read them sjdjdjdkd

that’s super smart!!! you just follow along the plan and delete when you come to the part. must feel so satisfying too i imagine. haha, what little notes i have i put in the notes app and just check up on when i need to. sometimes i even forget they’re there shdkdhsks. my notes are filled with half-assed dialogue or random one words notes that don’t make any sense to me anymore.. nskdhddjdj

you’re right!! so you write at night? sometimes i just open docs on my phone and write a bit before i sleep and when i wake up it’s either a grammatical mess or just... super bad hskshd the brain is simply too tired to create anything shakespeareian

nooo i’ll def check these out and let you know what i think. i’ve seen halsey being in pretty much every klance playlist on spotify so i imagine she portrays their vibes pretty nicely. doesn’t she have a song she sings about being blue and red or something... shdjfhdj such a bad description but i see it being used in edits a lot. also now that i think of it melanie has a song called pacify her that i really like!! do you like it?

THATS SO CUTE YOU ARE A CRYBABY. 🥺 same here tbh i actually like crying sometimes... sjskdjdjd like you said it just feels nice to get it all out. i cry to almost movie or series or book i read i’m a super emotional person but i also think it adds to the experience? you feel more immersed in it that way.

RIGHT??? ITS SO BEAUTIFUL!!! and it’s our boys 😭 and they’re cuddling 😭 under the sun 😭 ssjdjdhdjdj 😭

can’t wait to hear from you again <3 yours, ma <3

good night! more like ahhah

:o!! that’s so legendary of them wow.. <33 and yeah honestly the voice acting is phenomenal.. and all the implications behind the fight too? bakugou finally opening up? midoriya understanding that what he needs is to fight him? ugh. kiribaku is fine! fhdsjfks my brain is so full of todobaku that any other ship is really just... in the background hfskjfs but i can appreciate the relationship they have! with kiri being the only one bakugou has really acknowledged and seeing as being on the same level, that iconic hand clasp when bakugou was being rescued... i have a kiribaku fic in my drafts but idk if i can ever get to it ahha. you like them a lot right?

ikkk also i didn’t know we had to wait until the very end to buy? i have more than enough to buy it rn but when i clicked it said ‘must explore area 14 first’ and i was just... bruh. AHAHAH. okay so in my mind it’s like.. chongyun at a funky angle we’re kinda looking up at him and his body is like bent down towards us fhsdkjs idk how to describe it but i can picture it very well but i also cannot put it to paper/screen. and then his clothes are just black instead of white! HAHAH. tho i kinda wanna see if i can draw a xiao first to offer up to the gacha gods hfsdjkfs (and if i can i’ll do a version w a dark outfit too for u hehe)

legitttt im literally just logging in and grinding the talent domains every day fhsdkjfhskfhjd there are some artifacts i want as well but the domain is literally SO difficult for me fuck.

i just go in and use her skill then heal a bit and switch right away fhsdkjfsd it going alright! and then i go ham with my other 3 charas and switch back to her to heal again fhskfjd. OMGGG that’s so cute please... i miss diluc too... come back!! i wish we had a way to replay the old quests even if we get nothing out of them like i just wanna experience it again ya know.

oooo! that’s pretty nice. hfskjd you could switch barbara out for qiqi! since she’s a healer as well. omg wait you have lumine right? so your combat team has no males? legendary 😩 we love fighting queens! ya! traveller, chongyun, xiangling, fischl. and then i switch depending on the domain/boss i’m gonna fight. hmm elements I think would go: anemo, cryo, electro, pyro, hydro, geo, dendro? LMAO i reckon if i had diluc tho pyro would be higher... i also almost forgot to add geo to that list lmaooooooo oops, hbu??

I JUST SAW THE LINK.... AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! the bestest boys look how cute they’re sjdkfjdjjdd i’m obsessed. the picture where benny has his back turned sjdudjdjddnd stop. 🥺 they’re so neat. 🥺 also NO ARE YOU SERIOUS? that’s so upsetting are you gonna try it out nonetheless or do you think it’s too risky?

they’re SO neat!!! and bennett facing the other way was so fhskjfd yeah cute <3333333 I KNOWWW IM SO SAD :((( and no...... im not gonna try 😭😭😭 i told my brother about it too and he asked how many rolls i was at and i said 70 and he was straight up ‘you can’t try then’ and i was like ‘i know 😔😔’. @ xiao... i am giving up xingqiu rate up for you 😤😤😤😤 ugh i hope i can still get xingqiu in xiao’s banner tho even tho the chances will be shit. are you gonna roll ganyu’s banner?

FHSKJFSD NOOOOOO don’t tell me 172 is average for you wtf... (apparently the average male height in japan is 160cm! for reference ahah) and i myself am. one hundred and. fifty something cm hfsdjfhskjdfhskdjfhw9uehdsifhwsdkjfhsdkfhsd 😔 big sighs lmaoooooooo. how tall are you? (im assuming much taller 😔😔😔😔😔)

ooh notes app? nice ahaha. fhdkjfhskfsk hdthat’s the mood tho! if i don’t have my laptop with me i’ll write out everything on notes first then transfer to my laptop~

AHAHAH yeahhh i think mostly i do? bc during school times i’ll only write after i’m done with my work which = night time. for a while Peak writing time for me was like 1am lmfao but i do that in a like half-asleep half-conscious state so when i come back the next day at a “normal” time i run into the same issue as you fshdfkjshfs

she does!!! it’s called colours 😩 but i think the one i related to voltron most is control! there was this really good shiro edit with that song i still remember it to this day <3 yeah i do!!! i like most of melanie’s songs actually ahahah. i think my favourite for a while was show and tell~

it totally does!! like it’s satisfying as well you know... like the characters have gone through so much and you experienced that with them so it’s natural to get emotional about it. that reminds me, what kind of books do/did you read? did you read all Those YA novels ahah talking about crying has reminded me how i cried reading those..

<333 i wanna be there with them 😩 actually no i want to BE them 😩😩😩

eager for your response <33 love, c.r.

[norcumii]

Reblogged from the prior tumbl, originally posted 02/04/2016. Question submitted by @makiruz. Slightly reformatted to avoid a readmore cut and whatnot.

In Full of Sith, they always ask new guests how they got into Star Wars. And you know? That's a good question, how did you got into Star Wars?

HEH. Oooh, that’s a bit of a loaded question. So I’ll give you the short answer, which I suspect would fit the thing you mentioned what I haven’t heard of; and then because I’m a wordy bastard what overshares, the long answer which is more accurate and has content warnings for self harm and suicide.

SHORT ANSWER

It was the 80’s. I was young, in single digits, though I couldn’t tell you exactly what age. I was already dealing with an irregular sleep cycle, though all I knew was I had a flashlight, a pile of books near/on my bed, and a thick pound puppies duvet to read under.

I don’t know if I was in my room or on my way to/from the bathroom, but I could hear my parents watching something downstairs. Swooshy noises, a shrill screee, and some thwoom bzzts.

Of course I went downstairs.

I don’t know if it was episode 5 or 6. I’ve a fondness for 6, but carbonite left a HUGE fucking impression on me, and my parents have always approved of muppets, so Yoda.

I knew I loved it. I didn’t have any toys, though I think somewhere there was a print edition of A New Hope running around. I do recall multiple sleepovers at my grandmother’s place – a tiny house on acres and acres of woods – and she’d sometimes pull out Return of the Jedi and we’d watch it together on her tiny TV. Later on I’d be in bed, staring out at woods and trees that I knew, but seemed huge to a little kid, and I’d dream of Ewoks.

RotJ was Gram’s favorite, and for many years mine, too.

I like Ewoks.

VERY LONG ANSWER

TW: mental illness, depression, self harm, suicide, abuse

In late elementary, early middle school, my brother and I were basically reading ANYTHING we could get our hands on. He sometimes dove into books that didn’t interest me, so I’d read the first of something and then be bored and he’d keep going.

Star Wars EU was one of those. It was too grim for me. I think I didn’t run into any of the really good writers. It was all Han and Luke and Leia on the covers, so take that for what you will. There also was no Wookiepeia, so I was depending heavily on the writers’ abilities to convey things to someone very visual, yet pretty impatient with descriptions, so it never took.

I was in high school when The Phantom Menace came out. Mine honorable brother was off at college, so it was with great excitement on my part, and bemused tolerance on my parents’, that they and I went off to the theater.

On the one hand, I was dazzled.

On the other, there was Jar Jar. There was the fact that I hadn’t been impressed with the re-release of the OT – Han shot first. FITE ME. There was the fact that TPM didn’t feel like Star Wars, which was darker and grittier and…simpler to me.

So I wrote it off. Packed Star Wars away as “one of those things” that I’d been into, but felt like I was moving past. I was obsessed with Gargoyles, I was looking at going to college, and I would keep m’damn ewoks without needing to try to extend that vision with gungans.

College sucked. I went in, not sure if I wanted to go into English, for writing, or Psych, because I had always been what I’d now call The Mom Friend. I met a nice guy who tried, but things never really clicked between us, and there was an interesting bit that he was mad about Star Wars and insisted that I read the Rogue Squadron books.

That was a Good Decision. Dating him, not so much.

I had a huge assortment of Life Issues. Got into an abusive relationship that would end up lasting 14 years. Transferred schools. Got the fucking Psych degree, though literally only by the grace of a professor who didn’t want to see the kid not graduate just ‘cause she couldn’t numbers and I did go in and try. Talked to him and still couldn’t with the maths but the effort was there to bump me a few points above failing.

I was burnt out. I was depressed. I tried killing myself a few times – not very good at it, as you can see. Took up self-harm as a coping mechanism. Failed in the still never successful search for a decent therapist in Pittsburgh. Got a job slinging food, because needed some kind of income, and people without pressure was nice. The keeping on a schedule thing failed, leading to an average of 4 hours sleep a night. Losing contact with family and friends because I couldn’t stand the pressure of “how are you?” and “what’s going on in your life?” Clinging to Warcraft because repetitively farming was better than clawing open my back or neck again, and the people there were ok with some rando dropping out of sight on a dime, and only a persistent few had the grace and spirit to make it past some serious defensive issues of mine.

I stopped writing. Stopped caring about Gargoyles, stopped being able to see into that AU I’d made for myself of a crazy clan and the weird human who survived cancer with them.

Stopped going on IM, for the same reasons I stopped talking to people.

I still kept track of some folks via LiveJournal. A handful of the Gargoyles folks who were determined, gods know why and thank you, since I know several are here on the tumbles and I genuinely love you to bits.

I quit my job after five years, because enough was enough between the fact that it had all the hallmarks of an abusive relationship and I was fucking tired of being a manager without any actual authority, and the endless hamster wheel of hiring and people quitting because it was a nice, but highly dysfunctional place.

I missed the customers, though. Several of them are here too, and it’s kinda funny ‘cause I know in at least one case I talked to them about Star Wars. I still hope they’re not too shellshocked that I kinda went down the rabbit hole pretty deep.

Started getting more sleep. Not less anxiety, not less depressed. Tried out a few depression medications, with very mixed results.

Then one day @dogmatix came into the LJ area I still hung out in. Enthusiastically recommending to all and sundry that if there is even a shred of interest in Star Wars, THERE IS THIS THING YOU SHOULD READ.

She drew a Wookiee. That was a character?

I’d always liked Wookiees.

And I needed something to read.

Star Wars was one of those things, from back in the day before things went to shit. Low investment, since if I didn’t like it or didn’t care, then eh. Whatevs.  Dogmatix was one of the Gargs holdouts still in my circle (or whatever it is that I was hovering at the edges of), and in the past I’d liked her recommendations more often than I disliked them.

I’m also endlessly weak to her art.

Wookiee.

So I did that thing. That so many of us here have done. It took me about 2 weeks to get through Re-Entry. It had trouble taking root in the depression, but Obi-Wan going crackers was something I could empathize with and appreciate.

There was the hope that had been missing from the EU novels I’d tried reading back in the day.

There was Wookieepedia, which meant I could stop and see what a Nautolan was. I had tabs open for DAYS so when someone named Adi or Gallia who were apparently the same person? I could see who that was. I got stupidly distressed that Abella didn’t have an entry, until I twigged and checked for a Chitanook, and holy shit I could never tell what character was going to crop up as canon, obscure EU character, or home brewed.

I honestly expected to set it aside, get updates as they happened, and gradually step away because that’s how things were going at the time.

But I still needed something to read, to stave off empty hours when my brain was too full of screaming.

On Ebon Wings. I’d loved The Crow when I’d seen it back in high school, and that story tapped into the powerful visuals and the lovely message I’d adored and in ways I still don’t quite understand it somehow validated that I could be mad and still be ok. Maybe. Maybe not now, but someday.

Maybe.

So I gave in and got a Tumbl. I’d been a stubborn holdout, regularly checking the same half dozen feeds daily because dammit, I don’t wanna go through the trouble and I was close to giving up on LJ and another journaly thing? That was stupid. But I wanted to follow Flamethrower and Dogmatix, and it made it infinitely easier to follow several blogs (and oh GODS one of those is a mutual and holy fuck I swear I screamed the day that happened and it’s still a high to realize).

Dogmatix wrote Möbius and Accidental Timeshare, wherein Venge goes universe hopping. That’s also a weakness of mine.

I’d been kvetching IRL about the treadmill and wanting something to watch, and someone mentioned in Dogmatix’s feed The Clone Wars – which conveniently was on Netflix. So I figured what the hell. I was disinclined to like clones – ‘cause yeesh, they’re the reason the Jedi all died, and yeah, ok, the Order was SERIOUSLY FUCKED UP, but.

I still had never seen Episodes 2 or 3.

I turned on the Clone Wars movie, and within ten minutes I nearly fell off the back of the treadmill due to crying.

THIS was the Star Wars of my youth. THIS was what I remembered. A little grim. Lots of quips.

That sound. Lightsabers igniting. A-wings rumbling overhead. Blasterfire, and that music.

I had to stop and calm down and for the first time in ages WRITE [, because I just had to ramble about how it all hit me in the feels]. I had no idea I’d missed this.

By the end of the movie I’d decided ok, I wanted more. Wasn’t sold on these clone fellas, and damned if I could tell one set of armor from another (this is ALSO due to the treadmill screen being calibrated to be a compromise of a very short person – me – and a very tall person, which means neither person gets a decent view but that’s not what the treadmill tv is for).

I’d been told there was an order to the episodes, but I didn’t care. Continuity is for those who think about the future, and I was still regularly suicidal.

So the first episode I watched was Yoda romping around a planet, playing with droids while three clone troopers tried to babysit his mad little ass.

They had me, all in one episode. I loved these guys. They had individuality, I could tell them apart by the voices (which is sometimes just as important to me as visuals) even if I couldn’t name them, and the personalities –

They were loyal. Their primary concern was old batty Yoda which I had adored as a child because MUPPETS. They were willing to die to keep him safe and there was this lovely reciprocity in taking care of each other and all of them, clones and Jedi alike were doomed to extinction and I don’t think I knew yet HOW the clones were except they weren’t in the OT so there was shit going down.

Tragic figures, loyal found family, incredible voice acting, Batty Old Yoda who OH YEAH FUCKING KICKED SO MUCH ASS I COULD NEVER GET ENOUGH.

I wanted to keep those three clones. I was willing to keep them all.

Final blow, that knocked me into the fandom so hard I’ll be surprised if I ever leave?

THIS.

The origins of Balance. This is the post that started a simple notion, to try to write something when I’d gone….anywhere from 7 to 10 years of not writing A SINGLE. DAMNED. THING of substance – and that was after thinking I might try to get a degree related to it.

Darth Wraith was a tentative idea. I was scared @deadcatwithaflamethrower would be irked I wanted to play in her sandbox (oh my gods I was inserting myself into a conversation with her this amazing person who wrote blindingly well and so damn much and how the FUCK was I daring to speak up about a silly half DREAM I’d had because once again I couldn’t sleep).

Then, because I was trying to break out of the depression, the cycles of mental ill health, and if I was on this tumbls thing, fuck it, I’d try the IM thing again.

I’d been gone long enough that pretty much no one on my contact list was still there. That…was ok. There wasn’t the pressure.

And Dogmatix popped on, asking if I wanted to share details about this Sith Qui-Gon thing.

I had A SCENE. ONE. SCENE. And she was spinning it off into this EPIC, which at first I was gleeful because she had neat ideas and I couldn’t wait to see what she would do with it and then wait, she’s not talking about writing it herself, this is more about something WE could work on.

Thank gods it was IM, because I had a little panic about commitment to a project when I regularly was sure I wasn’t going to see tomorrow and if I didn’t wake up one morning that’d be MORE than ok.

Still. There was that itch. The visuals in my brain. The characters I’d started to like in Flamethrower’s universe, which had formed my mental voices for them.

The only sound in my head for so long was just screaming.

Writing down that scene in Knock On Effect, where Venge meets Wraith – that felt good. It never changed much from the first draft to what was posted. The rest grew, and quickly. It was clear if we were doing this, then there were multiple stories, spanning in universe years.

And then there were spinoffs. Wonderful ideas and plots spiraling away from this one notion, and gods I wanted to write about those glorious clones.

How’d I get into Star Wars?

Chance. One strange little step at a time, and a bunch of miracles and horrors that kept me bleeding but not dying. Damn good fic. The kindness of friends. The generosity of strangers.

The tragedy of a once great order of space monks, and their allies-forced-to-be-betrayers clones.

One little picture, of Qui-Gon Jinn with Sith eyes.

[jewpacabruhs]

I was reading your tags and please, for the love of God, write a Mafia AU. I haven't been able to find any good ones.

i wanna so bad! i find organized crime fascinating, & i’m also a big movie nerd, with crime films being my fav genre, so im super into that sorta thing. definitely would love to see it, but o boy, maybe ill jus write it myself?? gotta do everythin myself haha

i’d def go the historical route, so it’d be interesting to try to both apply characters that are firmly rooted in 90s/2000s behaviors & beliefs, and stick them in the 1900s. oh, boy, writing historical stuff is a pain. so much research. worth it tho, if it’s done well. aye, and it’ll be cool to try to keep it as nonfictional as possible. like, attempting to insert the kids (as adults, obvs) into crime history. i wonder if i could do tht? it’d be fun. it’s definitely uncharted waters. there’s a lot of potential there.

but, hmm, i think mafia aus are so rare in fandom (not just the sp fandom, but across the board) bc they contradict everything that’s popular in fanfic. mob aus would feature violence, business, finances, and corruption. whereas fics prefer cuddles, leisure time, a world where money aint an issue, and wholesomeness. and considering the majority of fic is written by horny and/or love-starved teenage girls who dont know or care about the aforementioned subjects, it makes sense. kinda a bummer, but understandable. in the defense of like everyone, lmao, those sorta fics take a lot of planning, & aint nobody got time. so i get it.

oof i think a major thing too is how gay-centric fic/fandom is, when the mobster world is undeniably a heterosexual one. thats an issue. shit, i wonder how many gay characters i could get away with while keeping it realistic. i mean, im sure there were gay mobsters, in fact i’ve read about a couple, but the lifestyles did not go hand in hand, lol.

IM STUPID NO ONE CARES ABT THIS DUMB SHIT HERES IDEAS

i’m thinking 1940s new york. im inclined towards kyman, as u probs kno, but again, the gay thing. huh. maybe i can figure it out. maybe theyre young bachelors, and theyre business partners & fuck around sometimes. we’ll see. anyway. if we’re gonna include all characters….

cartman would pull a goodfellas - he’s of, what, german descent? hell, considering his parents, he probably wouldn’t even exist in this universe. eh. well. he’d def be from yorkville, manhattan, cuz tht was a german neighbourhood. anyway he’d weasel into the italian mob, bc he’d be into the idea of 1) exorbitant amounts of money, and 2) being feared/respected. his authoritah! psh. and someone would notice how smart he is & mentor him, regardless of nationality. he’d quickly make enemies, though, because he’s rude & brash. he’d also quickly become one of the most respected young dons (would he reach that level, without a family? doubt it. he’d have to become a made man, which i believe is reserved exclusively for italians ….. ehhhh ill figure it out. maybe he’d branch out, start his own crime family. that’d be interesting. ooo.) damn, ukno, i think the 40s would make a real interesting character out of cartman. huh. yah, that’d be cool to explore, how that time period would shape him. like i said, he likely wouldt even exist. did the denver broncos exist back then? doubt it

kyle would get wrapped up in the jewish mob (which existed, and which i’d personally l o v e to be a part of lol - if i was born 100 years ago), maybe while trying to protect ike from getting involved? that’d be cool. maybe he’d demonstrate his brains & be offered a job as an accountant or an attorney, and he’d be forced to comply, either bc 1) his fam was threatened if he declined, or 2) his fam was doing bad financially & needed it. maybe both. hell, maybe he avoids the jewish mob & gets involved with the others. MAYBE IKE IS THE ONE IN THE JEWISH MOB & WANTS HIS BROTHER BACK FROM THE ITALIANS. OOOOOOOOO also they’d be from brooklyn, likely, bc that’s where jews were primarily located back then. u kno there was 400k jews in new york in 1899?? including my great great great grandparents. that’s a shit ton of jews lol. lil fun fact for ya. 

wait ok so oof this is hard now, bc the mob was primarily divided into three chunks - the italians, the jews, & the irishmen. there was also the puerto ricans, but that was, like, a different division. i’m mentioning this because nationality was important to mobsters, to all organized crimes groups actually, but south park doesn’t make a habit of mentioning what countries each character’s ancestors came from, lol. so it’d be a lot of writer interpretation. and that’s cool and all, but doesn’t give me much to work with, considering most of the kids are white and likely german/england-descended. 

i could make kenny & butters irish. that’d work. i think kenny’s last names irish, actually. they could be from hell’s kitchen, which had a p hefty irish-american population. maybe i could make stan irish, too. wendy might be able to pass for italian (little italy manhattan??? maybe the bronx??? im tryna think geography lol. for scale.). that’d work, if i wanted to put some stendy in there, bc i love making stan the token het guy, haha. maybe wendys dad marries her off to stan to form an alliance between the italians & irish. that’d be interesting. maybe cartman was rallying to get wendy to marry him, bc he needed to marry someone bc of, like, societal expectations, & she was the only girl who caught his interest. maybe he declares war on stan, to win back the bride he wants. maybe kyles best friends w stan, tht happened somehow, & interjects. goes to meet cartman to discuss a way out - ohhhhh theres my kyman babay!!! oooooo!!!

omg. plot forming. this is def an interesting concept. maybe i can use it as a chance to write a plot-oriented fic that doesn’t rely heavily on ships. that’d be awesome. i’ve wanted to do that for ages.

maybe we can squeeze christophe in as a french immigrant, maybe an associate of someone. same with gregory, but, like, british. that’d be fun. craig & tweek can be somewhere in there, too. associates of cartman or something. maybe they own a brothel. oooh. who else. bebe! maybe she can be a cabaret dancer who someone falls for. nothin wrong w hetero nonsense if it’s done right & if it aint nonsense. yah? maybe she can be ken’s love interest. also maybe token & nichole can be in there somewhere, from harlem?

this sounds fun as fuck, though, def. im really obsessed with new york right now, so maybe writing this could be a love letter to its history. that’d be dope. ooh, and im from las vegas actually, born & raised, so maybe i could do a chapter set there, considering the mob was very influential in the strip’s development. that’d be rad. holy heck. im excited abt this now. gotta finish oboitd asap & get into this, haha.

o shit. i jus realized, like, just how much research i’d have to do. like, not only about organized crime, abt 40s slang & dress, abt new york, abt everything. oooh boy this is a Project

ill get on that eventually haha, im into it now. it’s 4am rn tho so ima sleep, gnite anon