#ooc. this is the final version with all the sound effects | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mochidreambubble · 2 years

Text

Desire to Take a Bite out of You

Something about a Beauty taming a Beast… You could call it a cliché but it happens time and time again for a reason, no?

[didn't post it here originally but here, my self indulgent Reese fic cause when the newest update released I had lost my mind. AO3 version here.

Spoilers up to Episode 4 of Scarlet Hollow Episode 4 has me in a chokehold. Also probably OOC for Reese because I’m trying to hold back on purple prose but that is asking a lot from me. Almost all dialogue is lifted directly from in-game text (This was torture for I had to keep referencing in game dialogue lmao)]

With the doc fussing a great deal in the clinic above, Reese just stares into the ceiling as music blasts through his speakers. His phone that rests next to his head, sharing the lumpy space, has lit up with activity a great deal the past several hours. It’s from Stella. He should be keen on reading what she has to say, being the only friend for a long while that keeps in touch with him at all but

he’s

just so

tired, down to his very bones

and those bones are yelling at him, screaming to move and to stretch but into what he doesn’t know and he just wants to keep laying there but he needs to get up he’s just stuck here

Reese relents, at last, to read the wall of text Stella’s messages had accumulated to. Calls were one thing, but Stella tended to text more intensely - message after message if she could, in terms of her updates.

Almost all of it, in between what could almost be strung coherently like a B-grade horror flick plot, was about the only other Scarlet apart from Tabitha to currently walk the Earth. He actually can’t tell if she’s just excited to make a new friend or if there are some hints of a developing crush because she does seem taken with the guy.

Stella did have a history for dating Scarlets, even if the only one prior was Tabitha - that and she didn't tell Kaneeka or him. But he didn't think they were hiding it that well. Though comparing him to his cousin, from what she’s been explaining, he pegs the new guy in town as a lot less sour - heck, even friendly. There’s this odd sense that she’s skirting around talking about what this guy looks like for whatever reason. He tries to paint a picture in his mind of haunted eyes amidst a friendly face, but every Scarlet he got the chance to meet or see past pictures off were all so dreary. Maybe, despite being from out of town, or maybe because they were a Scarlet born out of Scarlet Hollow, that they morphed into looks so unearthly that no words could describe them. And Stella was just too nice to speak of it?

It would be interesting, Reese concludes, something worth getting up to see if he had the chance to. Stella talks quite extensively of him but has yet to offer up a picture of any kind after all.

He sleeps, dreams of finally leaving this prison of a house.

* * *

He gets his flippant wish, and part of him wishes to turn back time if only to make one with more serious thought

a key for his cage maybe

but he’s ecstatic - even if he can only express it in the mildest way possible - to see Stella and Kaneeka again; to finally have company aside from just his mom and the silence of the ever-changing guests at the morgue. His mom had told him that they were dropping by for dinner with said Scarlet stranger. He tells her his name is Ashe and gives the most noncommitted sound of acknowledgement she can. He supposes maybe she doesn’t think it’s worth remembering for long, since he was only here till the funeral before he likely dips for good, never to return to this sorry state of a town.

He tries not to be glued to the entrance, the doc fussing how he’s going to wear himself out and that the outside warmth would swelter him and the dozen over effects of why and how and everything. But he’s close enough to hear when they arrive.

“..What if Doctor Kelly yells at us?”

And he stifles a laugh. He hears Stella good-naturedly reply to Keneeka, even giving his own mom the benefit of the doubt that it was all fine and dandy that they were here a little early because they were there to hang with him after all. Makes him feel a little guilty them for delaying looking at her messages and updates. She really was a good friend.

He opens the door just as Kaneeka interjects, and he holds back the already rising laugh - he’s actually not sure the doc would react well if it devolves into a coughing fit. It would end the night early and he would hate that after he finally gets the chance to see other people again.

“Hey!”

He makes sure to take in the sight of both his childhood friends, holy hell it feels like it’s been too long, and…

Oh.

Oh fuck.

He takes the few insane milliseconds that quickly tick by that his friends used to greet him back to go through an inner state of panic cause what the fuck Stella how hard is it to tell him the new guy was a siren on land, a work of art a little warning would have been nice actually fuck he should say something

“You must be Ashe, right?” He offers a small smile and Ashe immediately retaliates with a bright one. “I’ve heard a lot about you. Stella’s been relentless about making sure I got all the Ashe updates.”

Gretchen starts getting huffy in Stella’s arms, her owner gently trying to calm her nerves. The poor pup never really liked coming here, and he’s a little surprised Stella still brought her along. His mom never lets pets in the house - near him especially.

“Hope she’s been saying good things,” Ashe gives a small laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.

Reese gets the feeling Stella would nudge him if she wasn’t trying to calm the restless Gretchen in her arms. “Please, I’ve just been thorough on our misadventures, and if those include unsavoury details about you, that’s on you, dude.”

She throws a wink his way and Ashe laughs with a little more vigour. Kaneeka rolls her eyes and gives Reese a pointed look, doing her best to

His mom rushes to the door at last, clearly in a worried and displeased huff that they were early.

Several minutes of tense small talk between his friends, the stranger and his mom, the visiting trio found themselves in his basement room. He tries not to just focus on the newcomer; his friends whom he hasn't seen face to face in forever were visiting after all. Who knows when the next time this would happen would even be. But he still peaks at Ashe from the corner of his eye, the teen who dressed in sleek monochrome studying his work so intently. It makes his heart dance and tremble. Perhaps he should have laid out his best work…

Stella pulls him back, she and Kaneeka spending minutes in conversation with him. You told them to make themselves comfortable while the newcomer continues to study Reese’s works. He's happy that his friends are here of course. Of course he is, but there's this great impatience there too. He can only be disappointed in himself but

hunger just a bite. you deserve it you want to sink your teeth into his pale neck and to lick the wound close and have him curl against you to rely on you wouldn't that be nice to be all he needs

“Your art…”

The three of them turn to Ashe who was meeting their gaze, his eyes in some form of contemplation as he gently brushes his fingers against the frames of the canvas. “I feel the emotion you put into these… They’re writing, just behind the paint, radiating pain and anguish.”

Oh. Oh he understood.

behind the paint, they yearn to pull him in, drag him so he remains here, forever immortalised

He walks over to the lithe young man. “I know what you mean. I feel it, too.”

Part of him wants to slap himself. Of course he would know, these were his paintings after all. He continues, if only to quickly pretend he didn’t say that. “When I’m working on them it's like I’m channelling whatever’s plaguing me into the paint, and when they’re done I feel like I’ve been emptied out, and all the vile things inside of me have been sealed away in the canvas.”

Ashe turns to him now, investing, transfixed even by his words. Kaneeka and Stella seem to browse around his room, trying not to interfere. So Reese continues. “It’s why I make so many of them. Sometimes, when I return to a piece, it’s almost like I’m offering an invitation for those feelings to slither back under my skin…”

The newcomer looks slightly mournful as the words pour out from Reese. “There are some pieces I can’t even look at. I hide them until I forget they exist. I’d rather not let those particular feelings back in.”

Kaneeka chimes in, a reminder that it was not just the two of them in the room. “Sounds kind of like… Therapy? That seems… Healthy, probably…?”

“Yeah, art therapy!” Stella’s chipper voice joins in. “Sounds like it does you good. Being empty must be better than being full of bad thoughts, right?”

“I think so. It works for me, at least.”

There’s a glint in Ashe’s eyes, slightly playful and enticing inviting. “If you ever need a model, I’m here ‘til Monday.”

It was like his heart was suddenly caught in his throat. “Th-That would be amazing. Though I should warn you, I work odd hours… I don’t usually pick up a brush until late at night.”

He doesn’t seem deterred by Reese’s words, and he feels confident to ask, trying his best to sound… Flirtatious? Hopeful?

“But if that’s not a dealbreaker, it would be incredible to have such a…” He tries not to fluster or blush, it would be so obvious on his pale visage. “Captivating model. I look forward to the company, and I hope I can do your likeness justice.”

“Late hours don’t bother me,” Ashe smiles, and Reese can understand why foolish sailors were drawn to drown by mermaids or to follow enchanting but dangerous beauties into the woods. “I’m something of a late owl myself, so I don’t mind if it’s alright for me to be over so late.”

Whatever elation you feel is sharply shattered when Stella interjects. “Maybe we could all come! Wouldn’t that be fun?”

Keneeka finally turns back at them from her corner, a little awkward as she reads the mood. “Uh…”

Ashe simply laughs good naturedly and the conversation lulls to other things. Reese tries to focus on the fact that things seem to be looking up for him.

Of course, he just had to fall ill at dinner, and his friends and the newcomer had to be chased out of his home…

He readies himself to be despondent on not seeing Ashe before he had to leave on Monday…

* * *

…Except whatever that seemed to be looking out for him finally threw him a bone. Reese was staring into the darkness, the chill of the morgue drowning him. Then, the lights clicked on.

Ashe was just as surprised to see him. Well, slightly funny as Ashe was likely trespassing out of the blue. He’s not disappointed though. “Ashe? What are you doing in the morgue?”

Clearly caught off guard, Ashe actually seemed a little flustered. “Uh,” he cleared his throat, trying to regain composure. There’s an odd look to his face, as if he was not used to being so flustered. “H-Hi…”

It was an adorable contrast to the cool countenance from yesterday.

and the hunger stirs deeply

“H-hey…” Of course, he shoots down any chance to be the cool one for a change. He scrambles to his feet to meet Ashe. “Sorry, this must look kind of weird. I promise I’m not secretly dead already or something. Sometimes I just come down to… Practice. Rehearse.”

Ashe steps closer, that playful gleam returning like from yesterday. “If you are a living corpse,” he pauses as if to ponder, then adds jokingly. “That wouldn't be a dealbreaker.”

“That’s good to know. I’m still not. But I’m glad I haven’t managed to scare you off, it’s not often I get to meet new people.”

Reese crosses his arms, trying to hide his nervousness, but unable to meet the eyes of the other, to fear his tells giving him away. “Especially new people I, um… Would like to get to know better.”

He sees the slight delight at those words, but Ashe was suddenly drawn to something else. The wall it seems. He didn’t mind. Not when it started a chain of exciting events. And well, it certainly helped that…

The retrieval of the axe gets slightly halted from the Doc’s quick return, and now Reese finds himself in the closet (Ha! Like a bad metaphor for the ages) with Ashe. He feels Ashe come closer to gaze out the small crack of the closet door, Ashe’s hand brushing against his. His reflex has him involuntarily twitching away, a quiet gasp escaping his lips. He tries to keep his voice steady in his whispers. “S-Sorry, I didn’t mean to bump you…”

“It’s okay,” His voice was so so gentle. How long was it that someone spoke to him this way, his own mother even. “I don’t mind.”

“Oh…” Reese relaxes slightly, though the whole affair made him anxious as he was excited. With a small smile back, Reese speaks up again, but he feels a blush colouring his cheeks. “Th-Then if you need to lean in, that’s okay. I don’t mind, either.”

He wonders if it was possible to feel regret and elation all at once in such intensity, especially since Ashe does lean in again. Reese does so too, trying to keep his eyes out into the office. He knows Ashe could likely hear the erratic beating of his heart and his shallow breaths, though Ashe himself makes no further comments on it.

Once they were in the clear and free to explore the office once more - Reese trying to not look like he was hurrying out, Ashe does give a soft laugh and it was like music. “Aw… I was having fun in there.”

He pauses in his search for the keys, heart once again caught in his mouth and a quick glance back to Ashe, cheeks dusted pink again. He could swear Ashe was all too pleased. It was like a hope, a swansong, this direct interest. He tries to search intently, unable to meet the other’s eyes. “...We could always… Spend more time together later. Once we’re done sneaking around.”

Reese shifts to another cupboard, trying to look too preoccupied to return his focus to Ashe. “If the doc hasn’t kicked you out by then.”

Though just like a mocking force enjoying his suffering, whatever joy that built up was shattered by haunting revelations. He was only grateful that Ashe let me use the axe to ruin that drywall. And maybe he was… Slightly happy to carry Ashe once whatever that stone… slab thing knocked him out. The carvings were so intrinsic, if the doc wasn’t on a warpath and a sleeping beauty wasn’t literally sleeping in his arms, maybe it would be interesting to sketch down.

Ashe certainly didn’t seem to mind when the revelation came up that Reese carried him down to his room and laid him on his bed.

“Wish I’d been awake while you carried me…”

Maybe Reese should mark the calendar for today for the most occurrences that blood has rushed to his face. “I could always put on a repeat performance… If that’s the sort of thing you’d like.”

Ashe seemed more concerned about him and his current circumstances than wherever occurred upstairs. He even scored an invite to… To live with him. Well, him and a pet cat of sorts. One may think they were moving so fast but…

“It’s an exciting thought. Living… With you.”

Anywhere was better, so long as they were away from her, a place where he could keep Ashe safe

can you? so long as she lives, can you keep him safe?

They discuss plans and theories of that woman, but it eats at him, something itches beneath his skin.

Ashe offers the most enticing distraction before more anger could build. “You could always… Draw me.”

Reese tries not to think of the frenzied painting of Ashe he did last night. It was all wrong when he tried, unable to being forth the captivating features and the life in those eyes. He dreamt that the painting of Ashe came to life and…

It doesn’t matter. He ruined it somehow. Tore through the canvas.

This was a chance to redeem that.

“If you’re sure you’re okay with sitting for a portrait… I’d love to draw you.”

He gets Ashe a chair, energised and excited at the prospect. He feels more alive than he has in years. Bolder even. After some rough lines, he decides to ask, “May I… Touch your face?”

His art model laughs, and every time Reese hears it, it’s always like a symphony that he wants to repeat. “You don’t even have to ask permission.”

He really is so… Calm about this attention. It shouldn’t be that surprising. People like Ashe… They are hardly the type to have a sparse dating history. He had mentioned offhandedly yesterday he wasn’t in a relationship now, but it just meant he had a history. There is that itch beneath his skin again, a gnawing feeling. He ignores it, pushes it down as Ashe gave him permission to touch him.

He feels the need to be gentle as he tilts Ashe’s head slightly to the side. He was so close he could smell the wisteria and jasmine on Ashe’s skin. Ashe was watching him from the corner of his eyes. Reese memorises the long lashes and gentle gaze.

“Perfect,” Reese says as he pulls away, missing the soft touch of the other’s skin on his fingertips as he pulls away. He doesn’t withdraw very far, eyes locking with Ashe who hasn't broken his own gaze from him. Ashe takes this chance to gently take his hand, bringing it to his cheek.

“Maybe you could study my face… More closely.”

He is pulled closer, and a flurry of words come to panic because he could swear he was about to get a-

Ah. But what was that and the constant theme of things not going his way? It was only natural perhaps, that it all went to hell.

That voice. That man, creature, whatever that ghoul was. He just has to interfere, had to be a thorn at Ashe’s side. It didn’t matter. Him. The doc. They would all be dealt with now, wouldn’t they?

* * *

It was like a sudden breaking of a curse. The anger. The hunger. It all snapped and tore away.

“She loves you Reese,” Ashe doesn’t recoil from him, a gentle hand on his face. “Leave now.”

He hears the plea, so torn, so heartbroken. For him.

“Before you do something you regret.”

“I’m not… a monster…”

The gunshot that came after that tore through him did not hurt as compared to the horror he saw flash in Ashe’s eyes. It hurt even more, the longing to be with him…

He flees.

#scarlet hollow #reese kelly #my writing #my fic #my self idulgent bullshit i am dying here #my oc: Ashelia #lots of copious in game text #anyways i am screaming to the hills until the next episode still

12 notes · View notes

mirajane-strauss · 2 years

Text

How I would have written Gruvia

Disclaimer: if you are passionate about the ship you may not like some criticisms of the canon, but it made no sense to use the anti gruvia tag since I’m talking about the ship, its potential and the things I like. Read at your discretion.

Intro is perfect, Juvia having a crush on Gray at first sight despite being her enemy is funny, and her falling in love with him when Gray shows her the sun for the first time is really touching, so yeah, perfect.

Juvia trying to get closer to Gray was good. While I understand that some people might be bothered by Juvia's "stalker", I also think they misunderstand her. I recognize that Juvia has questionable behaviors, but this is not one of them. It's not about her spying on Gray, it's about her trying to get close to Gray, but due to her insecurity she can't. It makes sense for her to do this since she was an enemy of Fairy Tail. And their second meeting at the tower of heaven is perfect. Finally, she can talk with him, Gray is glad to hear that she will join Fairy Tail, and Juvia saves him. I also think Juvia’s jealousy of Lucy isn’t bad, but it would have been more interesting to see the inner conflict of Juvia who on the one hand wants to get close to Fairy Tail and be accepted by everyone, and on the other she’s jealous of Lucy. Also, I would have avoided the scene of her shrinking Lucy's bubble, not for a matter of 'Juvia is a bitch' (objectively if Juvia wanted to hurt Lucy, she would have done it without difficulty) more because that scene sounded OOC, given that Juvia wanted to get into Fairy Tail at any cost, it would have made more sense for her to do anything to please them. But it doesn't matter.

Juvia finally entering Fairy Tail and approaching Gray is so good, the little initial moments between them are super cute, they eating together and starting to go on a mission together were nice panels, even if they are small and few moments, I think that here we are at the most beautiful point of Gruvia.

Tenrou Arc. Here Juvia started acting weird, I find it a bit demeaning that she wanted to leave the S-class promotion trial just for Gray. She is a powerful wizard, she must have been happy to have that position, as if she had extra recognition from her guildmates. It's okay that she was worried about fighting Gray, but not so worried as to abandon the evidence. Luckily it was a cheap comedy scene.

GMG. Ok here there are many things that bothered me.

One, what is that naval battle, Juvia should have won or not take part in it.

Two, what is the triangle Lyon Gray and Juvia. It doesn't make any sense.

Three, what is that ridiculous battle between Juvia and Chelia.

Four, what is that scene where Gray dies because Juvia is distracted during a battle (look, I usually ignore comic scenes, because they're usually just blatantly OOC for the writer's amusement. But in this case, I can't, since it had an effect on the plot).

Five, above all, what the fuck is that ridiculous version of Juvia at the ball and Gray rejecting her.

Okay, I would have done:

Juvia does not participate in the naval battle at all. So, we avoid that ridiculous scene that debases Juvia. Then, during the Juvia vs Chelia battle, Juvia fights and wins. That’s all, there’s nothing else. She just wins. And after, in case, we can see her already tired fighting against Lyon (who doesn't have a crush on her), and Juvia is in trouble because she has already fought against Chelia. Gray arrives and they do a great teamwork.

Then, during the battle against the dragons, ok, let's put in that scene that pisses me off. Juvia gets distracted and Gray dies. AFTER that scene it would have been nice to see a change in Juvia, and a decrease in her comic scenes. It would have been nice to see her feel guilty, even though Gray is still alive. It would have been nice to see Juvia grow, she realizing that her adoration of Gray has gone too far. Instead of that ridiculous scene at the ball, Juvia should have been worried about Gray, and he should have assured her that it wasn't her fault. And Juvia should have said that she doesn't deserve Gray's love and that she won't bother him anymore. And here instead of that rejection from Gray (which made no sense at all and made it seem like he really wasn't interested in her), it would have been nice to see him wrestling with his words to tell her that she didn't annoy him. Juvia thus realizes that Gray likes her but that he’s not yet ready to reciprocate her feelings, and in the end, things remain the same (with fewer comic scenes and with zero jealousy because now Juvia is sure of Gray's feelings, and so also Juvia would have a character growth).

(Oh, and let's eliminate that Juvia scene full of Gray puppets, as I said the comic scenes are mostly OOC but there is a limit to everything. Honestly, a poster was enough).

Tartaros. So much potential misused. Juvia fighting Keyes? Yes! Juvia having an inner struggle about killing the necromancer or not? Yes! Gray using Iced Shell and seeing Juvia? Yes! Final scene of Gray and Juvia meeting at their father's grave? Yes, But. The scene was sweet, I liked the fact that Juvia was ready to give up everything permanently, but I would have liked to have seen it developed better. Like, Juvia who seriously turns away from Gray thinking she doesn't deserve him, Juvia who at the same time cares about him and wants to help him, and therefore she has contradictory behaviors. Gray sees that she is acting weird and tells her he needs her (because he's not fine of course), and Juvia says that's not what he wants, since she's the one who killed her father. So, she finally admits it, and here is the sweet moment of the manga.

Avatar and Alvarez. At this point, my versions of Gray and Juvia would be different. The two here would already have a kind of unspoken relationship, they would constantly take care of each other, they would both have matured. Gray would have understood that he deserves to be loved, Juvia would have learned not to behave like a fan anymore.

Basically, I mainly want Juvia with more personality and growth, since what I see of her is just 'she simp around Gray', which in the long run is boring and heavy, and very static for her character. I also want to see that Gray shows before Alvarez that he romantically cares about her. The scene on the terrace where Gray tells her that after the battle he will tell her how he feels didn't even make sense, especially since Gray didn't do it afterwards. It would have been better to see him telling her that he loved her (in a more or less subtle way) and that after the battle he would finally give her the love story she deserves. In this way, even the impact of her death would have been greater.

#gray fullbuster #juvia lockser #look if you don't like criticism of your ship this post is NOT for you #I think the ship is nice #and it has so much potential #but I would have preferred to see it developed in another way #gruvia #fairy tail

36 notes · View notes

sokkalore · 3 years

Note

You're probably tired of people whining about this to you but I HAVE to get it off my chest, I've finally found my people. My God, I was starting to feel like I was insane for not liking the manhua (like at all). I genuinely feel bad when I'm in the minority, I feel like there's something wrong with me. I've felt like this for months and I really tried to force myself to change the way I felt towards the art because it's everywhere and I can't even interact with the fandom without it hitting me in the face constantly. There's this other BL manhua "Here U Are" and I remember literally being addicted to the way it was drawn for some reason but the TGCF manhua makes me feel weirdly overwhelmed (by all the colors and the detailed backgrounds, it's perfect for separate art pieces but when it's supposed to be a comic it's like... where do I even look) and extremely uncomfortable (with the faces especially and the ooc stuff) and I know how dramatic this sounds but it's the truth and I feel like it has even affected my perception of the story and Hualian and kinda ruined them in my eyes. It's more about the way the fandom treats their manhua version I guess, it's canon after all but like... How do you not notice the inconsistencies and the ooc stuff? And why do they have to treat the donghua like that "donghua hc is crying rn/could never" "manhua x would wipe the floor with donghua x" and so on. (this bothers me because it's a large majority of people saying this). It's especially frustrating to me because I love the donghua and the way it potrays xl and hc and just the whole story. And I'm sorry but hc's manhua potrayal lowkey disgusts me. Also no I don't hate starember but they're literally the official manhua artist... And look, I don't care if a gay ship consists of a super feminine shy petite guy who only bottoms and tall sexy dominant guy who only tops, as long as these are their canon characters then fine. It's not a bad thing, people like this exist irl. But my god when you change the way characters are/behave canonically to fit this criteria it's just like... Uhh. And I still can't get that post from STARember with the glasses and "the top should be a top and the bottom should be a bottom" (or instead of "should be" it was "look like a" something along these lines, they used the chinese slang for it the numbers 1 and 0). Dude... Is this all these characters are good for? For real? Anyway this is long as fuck, I can say even more things but whatever, I'm just tired

sorry this is from the other day and i just got to it but like yeah seeing how people are reacting to my tweets about the new art, there are a lot of people it seems who don’t like starember and are uncomfortable with their art but don’t say anything because it feels like the majority of fandom will dogpile them which sucks a lot..

however in that vein, me talking about it on twitter led to a lot of people also talking about how they were uncomfortable but didn’t know how to/were scared to say it and even people who praised it earlier and are now like …….. oh wait what the fuck (not excusing the latter i think it’s kind of pathetic to have to be Told something blatantly racist is… in fact racist but the point being here that i guess people are capable of listening if people point it out). idk i’m not gonna shut up about it if it has Any effect at all in making the fandom aware of starembers blatant colorism/racism bc rn… it’s not. not openly at least

21 notes · View notes

melancholydreadfuldream · 4 years

Text

Going Under Part One

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: 13th Doctor x Reader

Summary: An accident during a routine adventure made your life spiraled out of control with only the Doctor as the anchor. Will you ever find your way back to your Doctor again?

Trigger Warning: ooc, angst, plot holes as usual, attempted suicide, dark!doctor, death, insanity, etc. You have been warned.

More warning: English is not my first language so beware of the headache you will receive upon reading this.

A/N: Ok, this is going to be a very disastrous story and to tell the truth, I have no idea how to wrap it up in a pretty bow. For this particular story, I put the song Going Under by Evanescence on a loop to get in the mood hence the title. As usual, this story probably filled with lot of plot holes, but that is to be expected in my fanfiction. I'm very afraid to post this actually. It would be very me to ended up writing a bad fanfiction that no one care to read. I have finished part two, actually, but I will post it on queue. Ugh, I'm throwing myself into the usual circle of hell of wondering whether writing this worth it or whether this is trash. Wish me luck, guys!

Part Two is here

I fell to the ground after I was shot by that light beam. I thought I was a goner. From the concerned sounds of the Doctor and the fam, they thought the same.

It was our usual routine adventure that almost always followed by a crisis that only the Doctor can solved. This time, the crisis involved human experiments. The Doctor is righteously pissed at the perpetrators. And one of the scientists shot at the Doctor using his experimental weapon and I pushed her out of the way.

The Doctor and the fam fussed over me.

I felt pain and then nothing. I think I lose my consciousness for a bit. I woke up to the sound of sonic screwdriver insistently scanning me. I forced myself to open my eyes and saw the relieved faces of the Doctor and the fam. I groaned. "What happened?"

The Doctor and the fam shared a chuckle at my respond.

"Don't ever do that again." The Doctor said with a firm tone.

Seeing her serious expression, I sighed. Eventhough she would have done the same as me if she was in my position, the time lady doth protest too much, methinks. But I'm not in the mood to argue, so I replied, "I won't."

The Doctor gazed at me with indecipherable expression. "We should go back to the Tardis. I have to scan you some more. I don't know what that weapon is, seem to malfunction, you are very lucky, (name). But just in case, I need to do more test on you."

"Whatever you want, doc."

"How are you feeling?" Yaz asked me as she helped me up.

"Like I was electrocuted? But...now I feel kind of okay." I said.

"You scared all of us." Ryan said.

"Sorry. But I'm fine, see?" I decided to do a dramatic spinning and I regretted it when I lost my balance.

The Doctor catches me before I fall. "Not so fine after all..." she murmured. She is surprisingly very strong.

"Okay, I might need a rest." I admitted.

The Doctor made Yaz and Ryan led me back to the Tardis as she had to deal with the scientists.

7777

Yaz and Ryan took me to my room back inside the Tardis. I thanks them for their help before hugging one of my stuffed animals pillow on the bed and blissfully fell into a deep sleep.

I woke maybe a few hours later. The room is cold. I felt so uncomfortable as I forced myself to open my eyes. I was surprised to find myself on the floor in a very dark room. I reach around my pant for my smartphone and turned on the flashlight. I found the door and got out. I could hear the voices of the Doctor and the fam in the console room so I went over there.

"Guys, how did I ended up on the floor in some random room?" I asked loudly.

The Doctor and the fam froze as they saw me.

The Doctor quickly approached me and demanded in a very scary tone, "Who are you? How did you get on board of my Tardis?"

I was confused. "What do you mean?"

"We are inside the time vortex. How did you get here? And when did you even get in?"

I stared at her in confusion. "Doctor, what are you talking about?"

"Y-you know who I am?" The Doctor asked. She look at me in skeptical.

"Of course I do. Duh. We have been travelling together for a while." I said. "Ryan, is this one of your prank? Did you get her to play along?"

Ryan look very confused. "Err, you know me?"

"Ok, this is not funny, guys." I complained. "I'm so tired after our latest adventures. I mean, I did get shot. I'm really not in the mood for whatever prank this is."

The Doctor and the fam exchanged a look at each other.

They were making me nervous now.

"We don't know who you are." It was Yaz who replied.

"That's not funny, Yaz." I said. "Just stop it, guys."

"How did you know my fam? Who are you?" The Doctor demanded as she grabbed my wrist in warning.

"Doctor, you are hurting me. What is wrong with you?" I yelled angrily as I tried to pull my wrist free of her strong grip.

"Err, doc, I think we all need to calm down some." Graham said.

The Doctor released me grudgingly.

I massaged my wrist. "Had I known you would act this way, I would let that scientist shot you."

"What scientist?" The Doctor asked.

"You said you were shot? Where are you injured?" Yaz asked.

I sighed. "Are we still playing this? You are all there when he shot at the Doctor and I pushes her out of the way." I glared at the Doctor. "Don't worry, doc, I won't shield you again next time." I said sarcastically.

The Doctor pulled her sonic screwdriver and scanned me. "Human."

"Of course, I am human! Guys, I'm so..." I trailed as I finally take a good long look at them and realized they really have no idea who I am. "You really have no idea who I am?"

The fam nodded in unison.

I could feel myself start to panic. "Oh God, is this the side effect of that shot? Did it makes you guys forgot all about me? I mean it was experimental weapon. And, doc, you promised to do a scan on me in the Tardis to see if there is any other...damages..."

"I don't know who you are and what your plan is but if you are planning to..."

"I'm not! I am not the enemy, okay! Just chill!" I yelled at her when I noticed she is about to give me her oncoming storm rants. I quickly pulled my smartphone.

The Doctor raised her sonic screwdriver at me warningly.

"I have proof, okay?" I placated. I went through my phone and to the gallery. I showed them our many selfie group pictures. "Here."

The Doctor grabbed my phone and took a few step back. The fam goes to see the pictures in disbelief.

"How is this possible?" Yaz asked the Doctor.

The Doctor observed the pictures and then she stared at me. "What is your name?"

"It's (name). (name) (last name)." I replied weakly.

The Doctor nodded and went to the console, pushing some button. The monitor suddenly turned on and show information on me. While at it, the Doctor performed a scan on me via the Tardis. She also cloned my phone so that she can investigates the pictures. I think she suspected it was fake photoshop picture or something.

"Satisfied yet? I'm not lying, okay."

The Doctor hummed. "We will see."

I groaned in annoyance.

While the Doctor busy consulting with the Tardis, I sat on one of the stairs. I watched the Doctor and the fam stay far away from me and whispered really quiet. I sighed.

The Tardis suddenly bleeping loudly and the Doctor run around the console and then stopped in front of the monitor, reading the information provided by the sentient ship.

The Doctor look awed, her mouth dropped open. She turned to look at me.

"What is it?" I asked.

"According to this, you are from an alternate universe." The Doctor replied. "But how did you even ended up here?"

"You are asking me? I have no idea. Last thing I remember is sleeping in my room at the Tardis and then I woke up here." I said.

"Tell me exactly what happened before. You said that you were shot...by some scientist?" The Doctor asked.

So I told her exactly what happened.

7777

While The Doctor is busy figuring out what exactly happened to me, I sat alone at the kitchen's Tardis. At least the way to the kitchen is still the same. I made myself a coffee and sat staring at my cup absentmindedly.

Ryan come in and sat with me for a while. He was curious about the other Ryan and asked me to tell stories about my own adventure back in my universe.

I sighed. It seemed I have come to accept what is happening to me. I am indeed in twilight zone where I have never met the Doctor and the fam thus never boarded the Tardis. I was kind of sad so to distract my mind, I relented and tell him whatever he want to know.

Eventually Yaz joined us. We started talking about our respective adventures and about the Doctor. We got a laugh over the Doctor being pretty much the same in any universe.

I don't know how long we talked but I was grateful for them for easing my loneliness. I finally noticed the Doctor is standing leaning against the doorway, watching us. A small smile touched her lips as she watches us.

"Doctor." I called out. "Did you find anything?"

She shook her head. "I'm sorry. Unless we found the weapon they used on you, I can't exactly figure it out."

"So, we have to go to the place where the scientists are? Okay. Let's go." I said, eager to get this over with so I can go back to my Doctor and my friends. "I mean, I guess we should find your version of the scientists who did this to me, right? So that you can take a look at the weapon?"

The Doctor look impressed with me.

"Then what are waiting for?"

"Tomorrow." The Doctor replied. "We are all tired. You look tired."

I wanted to protest but she shushed me.

"Come on I will show you to your room." The Doctor said.

7777

The Doctor left me in my new room. The room is just ordinary without any of personal touch. I felt the loneliness come back. I laid on the bed, trying to hold back my tears. I pulled my phone and swipe on the pictures of my Doctor and my fam. I hope to God that I could return back to them as soon as possible. "Please don't let me be trapped here." I whispered. I fell asleep soon after.

I woke up to the concerned voices of the Doctor and the fam. I opened my eyes in confusion. I wasn't in my room. The Tardis med-bay, my mind supplied.

The Doctor and the fam looked at me with troubled expression.

"Doctor? What happened?"

"You're awake."

"How did I get here? I was in my room."

"The Doctor is checking on you and she found you in a seizure." Yaz replied. "You really had all of us scared out of our mind."

I smiled a little. I felt bad for intruding on them when they didn't even know me. I frowned. I didn't remember getting a seizure though. I looked up toward the Doctor. "Thank you for checking up on me. You saved me."

"We are even then..." The Doctor said.

"Yeah."

The Doctor gazed at me. "Do you feel any pain right now?"

"Not really, just really really tired." I trailed. My eyes widened suddenly as I look at the Doctor. "we are even?"

The Doctor looked confused. "Yeah, you did saved me first, by pushing me out of the way."

"You know me!" I yelled suddenly. "You know me, right?" I asked her and then turned to the fam. "You guys too? Yaz? Ryan? Graham?"

The Doctor and the fam stared at me as if I had gone insane and exchanged a look with each other.

"err, did she get a concussion, doc?" Ryan asked.

"Hey!!" I yelled. "Focus!! Who am I?"

"You don't know?" Graham asked.

"Of course I know who I am. Do you? Come on, guys, work with me here!" I said as I forced myself to get up despite their protests. "Who am I?" I barked at them. If the situation is different, I would have laugh at how angry I sounded but I was desperate for them to make sure they do know me.

The Doctor stared at me and then replied, "You are (name)."

"And?" I urged. "Did I travel with you and them in the Tardis?"

"You know you do, (name)." Yaz said. "What's gotten into you?"

I sighed in relief at their confirmation. I laughed. "I'm back!" I laughed some more as tears suddenly fell into my cheeks.

"(name), are you alright?" Graham asked cautiously.

"You guys won't believe what happened to me." I said. And I told them what happened to me earlier.

7777

I sulked. They don't believe me. At all. Because according to them, I have been sleeping in my room that whole time. Even the Doctor said what I'm experiencing is probably a nightmare. In a way, it made sense. The Doctor and the fam never knew me? My greatest fear.

I sat on the stairs on the console room. After what happened to me, regardless whether it was real or not, I don't feel like to be alone so I sat there, watching the Doctor at the console.

The Doctor noticed me and decided to join me at the stairs.

"So, a seizure, huh? Was it because of that weapon? Have you figure out what that weapon are? Did it meant to give the victim a nightmare and a seizure?" I asked the Doctor.

The Doctor look troubled.

"Doctor?"

"Don't worry, (name), it will be okay."

"So there is something to worry about?"

"Of course not."

"But you just said..."

The Doctor surprised me when she suddenly grabbed my face. I blushed at the close proximity.

"Just trust in me, (name)." She said as she put her forehead over mine. "Just trust the Doctor."

"I do trust you, Doctor." I said softly.

I feel dizzy all of sudden and fell to the floor, unable to balance myself. "Ow, what the hell...? That is some headache..." I looked up and frowned when I realized I was alone. "Doctor?"

7777

My eyes widened as I take in the console room. It was different from what I used to. But there is no one in the console room. Fear nagging on the corner of my mind. Have I gone insane? Or did I somehow travel somewhere else again?

I know the Tardis is not in mid-flight, it was already landed somewhere so I got out of the Tardis to check it out. As I opened the door, I saw the beach and a man in a trench coat was there, nursing a banana daiquiri. He had his ties tied around his forehead and a black sunglasses covered his face. He was drunk as a skunk. With no one in sight, I had no choice but to go to him for information.

"Hello." I greeted.

The man glanced at me and smiled brightly. "Why, hello there. Where did you come from? No one go to this beach this time of the years..."

"Yeaah...about that...where am I...exactly? I'm kinda lost...?"

He beamed. "I'm good with lost thing. Oops, where is my manner? Hulla there, I'm the Doctor."

My jaw dropped in shock. "W-what? You? You are the Doctor?" I asked.

"Yeah, do you know of me then?" He asked in dopey manner.

"But...you are a man..." I said dumbly.

"Of course I am a man. What else I could be?" He asked almost like I insult him.

"Right. She said she was once a Scotsman before. It was a time lord thingies, was it?"

He sobered up almost immediately. "How did you know that?"

"I'm not the enemy, okay? Everytime!" I yelled, pissed at his tone that is almost accusing. I admitted I was being dramatic. It was only one time but I just hated being questioned of my intention. But then again, this version of the Doctor never met me so of course he will be suspicious.

He frowned at me.

"Look, Doctor. I don't know what is happening to me. I keep waking up into different Tardis than the one that I know of. My Doctor said everything is alright but as you can see, the fact that I'm here instead with her means something is wrong. I knew she is holding out something on me. Trust in the Doctor, my ass!" I ranted.

He blinked at me. "Soo, you are a future companion of mine then? And I will be a Time Lady in the future?"

I blinked back at him. "You are taking this surprisingly well. I thought you would give me the oncoming storm speech. Considering I have no proof that I am indeed your future companion..."

"I feel like you are quite genuine to fake it."

"err, thanks?"

He grinned a boyish grin at me. "Right then, off to the Tardis we are!" He said as he grabbed my hand toward the Tardis.

I pulled away from him. "Bit forward, aren't you?"

"What? Didn't your Doctor grab your hand and told you to run?"

"Noo. She told me to get off my ass and help her barricade the door."

"Oh."

"We were under alien attack, you see, it was my first time to see alien so I was kinda out of it."

"Right. That sounded like interesting story which we can continue on the Tardis. Come on."

I followed him obediently.

7777

I told him what happened to me, about the shooting, about the alternate universe.

The Doctor hummed as he pushed some button on the Tardis as he made the machine scan me.

"So, am I in the past or am I in some random alternate universe?" I asked.

The Doctor frowned as he observed the monitor containing information on whatever it is he is working on.

"What is it?"

"Nothing." He said as he tried to pulled the monitor away from me but I was faster this time and I saw it.

"Ooh..." I was understandably shocked. Because according to the Tardis database, I don't exist.

"Different universe yeah?" He said as if trying to console me.

"Yeah." I nodded numbly. "But... you believe me?"

He nodded. "Course."

I sighed in relief. "Can you get me back home?"

"I will most certainly try."

I nodded gratefully. "Thank you."

He smiled at me. "So, since you are from alternate universe, it meant whatever you tell me will not be spoiler. So tell me about your Doctor. I have never regenerated into a woman before. What was I like?"

"Well, you love to talk, I guess you are always like that, huh?"

"Love talking." He said cheekily.

I described my Doctor to him. He gave me an amused smile. "What?"

"Sounded like you fancy her..."

I blushed. "Shut up. She is my best friend, okay."

He grinned.

My stomach choose that moment to protest in hunger much to my embarassment.

He chuckled. "Come on, let's go to the kitchen."

I followed him gratefully. "Doctor, where are your companion?"

His smile vanished. "I wasn't taking anyone currently."

"Ooh." I felt bad for bringing that up because it sure ruined his mood. "I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For whatever happened to you or your companion."

He look surprised.

"You have that sad eyes, like my Doctor. Before she met me and the fam, she lost someone too."

He smiled sadly. "Yeah that tends to happened." He sighed and then he stared at me. "The fam?"

I shrugged. "It is what she called us."

"Blimey how many companion did she have right now?"

I told him about the fam happily. He was lonely, I can tell. I wonder what happened to his companion. But I know better than to ask that. So all I can do is tell him about my funny adventures to ease his loneliness. We entered the kitchen and he started preparing a light snack and tea for me.

7777

I woke up on the floor...again.

"err, how did you get here?" A young man suddenly waved me for attention.

"W-what? Where am I?" I asked in confusion.

"You are in the Tardis kitchen but how did you get here?"

"Are you the Doctor?"

"No. I'm Rory, my wife and I travel with him." He said. "Are you alright?" He look concerned.

"My head hurts." I said. "Can you get me to the Doctor please?"

He nodded. "Wait here." He quickly left and yelled for Amy and the Doctor.

My head hurts really badly. I felt like I'm about to throw up. I forced myself to stand up and walked out of the kitchen and fell.

7777

"DOCTOOOORR!!" A young woman screamed loudly making me wince. "Hey, are you alright?"

I groaned. "I'm not okay. I think I'm dying..." I said.

"DOCTOOOORRR!!"

I groaned. "Please stop yelling at me. God, I'm in hell..."

"Sorry."

"Clara, what's with all the yelling?" An old man dressed like a magician suddenly appeared.

"Look at her."

"Who is she? Did you invite a stranger without my permission?"

"I did not! I found her in the corridor like that." Clara said with a glare.

He sonic-ed me. "You looked like hell."

"I'm dying..." I said almost petulantly.

"She kept saying that..." Clara said.

"Get her to the medbay."

Contrary to my belief, I was not dying. Apparently I was dehydrated. The Doctor gave me some infusion. I felt so much better now.

The Doctor and the young woman who identified as Clara stared at me curiously as I devoured some food they gave me.

"Right, you want an explanation." I said.

"That would be great, yeah." Clara said.

"Well, what did the Tardis tell you? Am I at least exist here?" I asked.

The Doctor frowned. "How do you mean?"

"The last universe I was in, the Doctor told me that I didn't exist. The one before that apparently never met me. I'm so tired. I just want to go home to my Doctor and my friends." I said tiredly.

"Tell me exactly what happened to you." The Doctor demanded suddenly.

And so I did. Again.

"So, ever since the shot, you have been crossing all over the universe?" Clara asked in awe.

I sighed. "That, or my Doctor is right and this is all just happening in my head. A nightmare of some kind. Though I didn't think so. Even I wouldn't be able to conjure so many detail about the Doctor."

The Doctor told me that the Doctor I met in the beach is his tenth incarnation and that he was the Twelfth one.

"Yeah, I think my Doctor is after this you. She mentioned that she used to be a Scotsman before." I replied.

"Wait, your Doctor is a woman?" Clara asked giddily. "Oh, I have to meet her."

The Doctor gave Clara a look.

"What? I am curious. You as a woman." Clara said with a grin at the Doctor. "Tell me what she look like." She asked me.

"Am I allowed to tell her?" I asked the Doctor. "Am I in the past or...?" I'm almost afraid to ask.

"You are in an alternate universe. And you did exist here." The Doctor said.

I nodded.

"Well? Tell me please." Clara urged me.

I grinned at her and told her what she wanted to know.

The Doctor pretended to be busy with something else but both Clara and I know he is secretly listening. He asked me for some blood sample and I let him. I trust him.

The last words my Doctor left me...trust in the Doctor. So I did.

7777

I woke up alone in the Tardis medbay. I sighed, resigning myself to be in another random place of universe. I wonder where I ended up right now.

I got out of the medbay trying to find the Doctor. For once, I recognized the Tardis interior. My hearts swelled with hope that I am back at home. I walked as fast as I can to the console room hoping to find the Doctor or the fam. I found none.

I got out of the Tardis. I was in some alien planet. Without thinking for my safety, I stepped out of the Tardis. And then I saw her. The Doctor. My Doctor. But does she know me?

The Doctor stood alone, looking so lonely. My heart ached for her.

"Doctor?" I called out.

The Doctor turned around and her eyes widened as she saw me. "(name)? Is it really...you?" she stuttered my name.

I gave her a hesitant smile. "It's me."

She hugged me and she actually burst into tears.

I hugged her back but I was confused. "Doctor, what's wrong?"

She pulled out of the hug and put both of her hands over my face. She smiled sadly. "My (name)..."

I felt uncomfortable. I like her so much. In fact, I could actually admitted that I have a crush on her. But the way she called my name, it's almost like we are lovers which I know we are not.

"I missed you so much." She said with a sob.

I was floored. The Doctor? Doing emotion? Something is wrong with her. "Doctor, where is the fam?"

She sobered up immediately. A dark expression crossed her features.

"What's it?"

"I lost them...to the cyberman."

I blinked. "Jack's warning..."

She nodded sadly.

"What happened?"

"I failed them." She only said that, not wanting to relive the painful memory.

I wanted to cry. I can't believe it. The fam can't be gone. "How long have I been gone?"

She didn't answer. Instead she turned around and walked toward to a bunch of stone. I followed her and I froze when I saw it.

It was my graveyard. The stone has my name carved on it.

I shook my head. "This isn't it. This isn't home." I whispered.

"She said that too." The Doctor said. "You, she died in my arms. She died in pain and she kept screaming that she wanted to go home."

I was shook to the core. Is this my future? Did I just give myself a spoiler?

"I never understand what is happening to her. I tried to make sense of it. It sounded like she was being torn apart from the inside." The Doctor said with a forlorn look.

I shook my head in disbelief. I ran back toward the Tardis. I screamed while I was inside. "Please, please take me back home! I'm done with this! I'm done!!"

The Doctor entered the Tardis. Her eyes looked sad.

I ignored her as I broke down in tears. I bend my knees on the floor and cried.

She also sat beside me and hugged me close.

"What is happening to me? Please fix me, Doctor." I begged her. "Please..."

The Doctor nodded weakly. "I will. Of course, I will."

I stared at her. "Promise me." I demanded. I know I was being cruel. "I want to go back to my Doctor and to my friends."

"I promise."

The Doctor lies. That's what the Master once told me when we met. She won't lie, would she?

I made the mistake to gaze at her and I saw something frightening in her features.

7777

I blinked and froze when I saw Twefth Doctor and Clara again. I was in a different console room again.

They stared at me.

"You are back." Clara said.

My whole body just trembled mixture of fear, shock and relief.

"I just found out I will die a painful death." I blurted as I wipe my tears off with my sleeve.

The Doctor and Clara blinked at me.

"I'm so tired of saying this. But for the love of God, please help me, Doctor." I begged him.

The Doctor stared at me and nodded. "Your blood sample come back. You are indeed dying."

"Doctor!" Clara shouted in warning.

I nodded and laughed harshly. "I figures as much."

"There is something changing your DNA and it made you into a personal time machine. One that seemed to anchor yourself to the Doctor. Any Doctor. Any universes." The Doctor said. "And you are only human, your body can't take it. You are dying a slow death."

I sighed. "I guess the good thing about this is it was me instead of the Doctor." I said softly. If I had not pushed my Doctor out of the way, it would be her in this predicament. The thought of the Doctor dying, I shuddered. The universe will be screwed.

The Doctor looked like he was being slapped. "She would not want that. I, she would not want you to die in her place."

"I didn't want to die either. But..." I stared at Clara. "You would do the same for him, wouldn't you?"

Clara stared at her Doctor solemnly. "In a heartbeat."

The Doctor gazed at Clara.

"Right, okay? Is there a way to at least prolong my life?" I asked them, broke them from their loving gaze.

The Doctor replied without looking at me, "Working on it... Would be easier if you led me to the scientists so I can take a look at their project."

"Right." I tried to wreck my brain to remember what planet the Doctor took me that times. I was at loss.

He rolled his eyes. "Human. Pudding brain."

"Hey!!" Both Clara and I yelled at him.

He grabbed me and told me to put my hands on the Tardis telepathic circuit. He told me to focus on my memory of that planet. So I did.

7777

I was in a middle of a town square. The town sign told me it was Christmas. I groaned. "Now what?"

I heard the unmistakable sound of a sonic screwdriver and a man in bow tie is wielding it at me.

"Hello, there, I'm the Doctor."

"I know. The sonic screwdriver kinda gives you away."

"You know me then?"

I sighed. "This is bullshit. Doctor, I'm a future companion, okay? I traveled with your Thirteenth incarnation. But I might be from another universes. It has been happening a lot lately. And I'm dying apparently."

The Doctor glared at me and let out a harsh chuckle. "Nice one. But I am on my last regeneration and I don't have anymore. So, who are you, really?"

I stared at him disbelief. "You have got to be joking. I don't have a proof, okay? But I wasn't lying."

"Yeah, you are not lying about dying, are you?" The Doctor said as he read the result of his scan from his sonic screwdriver.

I fell silent to that. "Fine." I said. "Don't believe me for all I care. I won't be here long anyway. I probably gonna disappear to another universe, another you again soon." I crossed my arms, well aware that I'm sulking.

He frowned at that. "You are from another universe." He stared at me as he circled me around.

"Oh now you are curious, are you not?" I mocked him in my anger. I shuddered in cold.

He sighed and he pulled his jacket and gave it to me much to my surprise.

I took it and murmured a small thank you.

He took me inside a tower.

"Soo...you believe me?"

"You can't tell a lie here. There is a truth field in this planet. So, yeah, I do believe you." He said as he gave me some hot tea. "So, tell me about what's been happening to you. Sounded like you have a tough day."

"You have no idea. And honestly, I'm tired of having to tell it over and over again to every version of you. I never stick around long enough to get some answers." I said solemnly.

"Tell me anyway." He requested.

And so I did. Again.

7777

I felt dizzy. "Oh great..." I moaned without opening my eyes.

"Found you." Someone suddenly grabbed me from behind and hugged me.

It was the Thirteenth Doctor but from her voice, I could tell immediately she is not the one.

I tried to move away from her but she kept me still. "Doctor?" I called out.

"My (name)..." She whispered and then she put some sort of a collar on me.

I struggled against her but it was futile. "What the hell is this?"

"I found a way to keep you from splintering again." She said as she released me.

I fingered the collar. "This?" I asked as I turned to face her. I noticed she was dressed differently from her usual clothing. Everything about her feels different.

She nodded solemnly.

"Splintering?" I asked.

"Basically you tearing every atom in your body by traveling all over the alternate universe."

"So, as long as I wear this, I can stay here."

She beamed. "Yes. With me."

"But, if you are from my future, wouldn't this be a paradox or something?"

She smiled at me chillingly as she caresses my cheek. "Don't worry your pretty face about it." She said. "There, I keep my promise. I fix you, my dear."

I forced a smile for her despite feeling really uncomfortable and also I can't help that bad feeling nagging in my gut. Instead I said, "But does it have to be a collar?"

She laughed in delight. "Would you prefer a ring instead?"

I blushed at that. "Maybe." I muttered. "Because this collar isn't really me at all."

She smiled at me in fondness. "Then I will work on it for you." She pulled my hand. "Come on, you must be tired and hungry."

I followed her to a room. I didn't recognize it.

"This is my room." She said.

I blinked in surprise and took a look at the room. "It's nice." I said lamely.

She grinned. "Come, sit with me. Tell me all about your adventures."

I stared at her warily but did as requested. She gave me plenty of food and drink and it was all my favorite. I smiled at her.

7777

I must have fallen asleep. I blinked for once realizing I'm still in the same place. The collar did work after all. But the Doctor is nowhere to be found.

I walked out of the room and take a glance at the corridors. I decided to go find some food in the kitchen when I heard voices in the distant followed by some bleeping light on the corridor. Almost like the Tardis is trying to guide me somewhere. So I followed it.

I wish I didn't. I can't believe what I saw. The Doctor. She had a hostage on board of the Tardis. I distinctly recognized the scientist that shot at me. The Doctor is torturing him.

I felt like I was being punched. I was so scared. I wanted to confront her, to demand her for explanation but that bad feeling in the pit of my gut come back full force. I decided not to risk it. I slowly left the place, hoping she didn't notice me.

As soon as I was a safe distance away from the Doctor, I pulled on my collar wanting to rip it free but realized in horror that I couldn't.

"Nooo. This can't be happening. What is happening?" I muttered to myself, shaken in fear.

I touched the wall and hesitantly speak toward the sentient machine. "You purposely show me that. What do you want me to do?"

There is no answer. I felt weak in my knees. I let myself fall to the floor, hugging my knees and cried.

A hologram suddenly appeared before me. It was the hologram of the Thirteenth Doctor but it was wearing the original clothing. It was staring at me in somber.

"Tardis?" I asked.

"Run." It said.

"What?"

The hologram suddenly vanished as the real Doctor suddenly showed up. She was staring at me with a look I can't decipher.

"You should have stay back in my room, (name)." She said solemnly.

"Why did the Tardis tell me to run from you?" I demanded.

She shrugged. "She is just confused. My old girl."

"She is warning me about you." I said.

She rolled her eyes. "Come on, (name), be reasonable."

"Reasonable? I'm not the one who has been torturing people!" I snapped.

I know I did something wrong when a dark expression crossed her feature.

"You saw it, didn't you?" She said in resignation. "Oh, well..." She moved toward me.

I stopped her. "Don't."

"Don't be afraid of me, (name), I would never hurt you."

"You just going to keep me as your pet, is that it?" I asked.

She blinked at that. "I promise I will change that collar into a ring soon."

"This is not about the damn collar!" I yelled.

She didn't look bothered by my outburst.

"Actually, yes, this is about the collar." I recanted as I tried to pulled it off. "Why can't I take it off?" I demanded.

She smiled chillingly. "I have to make sure you will stay with me."

I shook my head in denial. "Who are you? The Doctor I know wouldn't do this to me."

She snorted. "You don't know me that well, (name)."

"You are right. And right now, I don't want to know you."

She look like she was being slapped. She growled at me. "Stand up."

I glared at her. "No. You go away." I said petulantly.

"(name) (last name), do not test me."

"Leave me alone." I said as I closed my eyes, covering both of my ears. "Just leave me alone!"

Silence. And then I felt her hands pulled my hands away from my ears as she put her forehead over mine. And then she whispered, "Never."

I opened my eyes to look at her and stunned at her sorrowful expression. Part of me almost wanting to comfort her.

And then everything went to black.

7777

When I woke up next, I was hoping to be somewhere else. The one time I wish I could leave, I got stuck. I woke up in a room, not the Doctor's room from earlier. I was alone. The Doctor is nowhere to be found. I realized in horror that this particular room does not have a door. I can't tell the way out.

The Doctor never showed her face to me for the next few hours? days? I don't know. At first, I didn't care. I did wonder if she is planning to starve me as she has not given me any sustenance. Strangely enough I did not feel hunger or thirsty. Heck, I didn't even need to go to the bathroom which is probably a good thing as it would be embarrassing if I have to pee or more all over the place. Though it did make me wonder if I was already dead. Why else would I not require sustenance?

There was nothing to do in the room. I was alone with my thoughts. And I was never good at being alone. I refused to let her win though. I know she is punishing me, a silent treatment of sort. For a time, I was fine with it. I thought of my favorite stories, my favorite scene in a movie, a favorite song, anything to get my mind off the loneliness.

"Tardis?" I called out hesitantly. "Can you...talk to me?"

Nothing.

I sighed as I sat on the floor, hugging my knees close. I was bored out of my mind. I started wondering if this will be the end of me.

Eventually the Doctor did visited me but she always appeared out of nowhere. I tried to be vigilant on her next visit in hope I could catch a glimpse of the way out. No such luck.

She gave me some book to read and an ipod containing music. She even brought some flower and put it on a small table.

I was curious about how long I have been here and how it is I remained alive without sustenance for so long.

"This is a time vault. It basically forcing you to stay alive." She explained. "Like the flower I brought in, it won't require water to remain blooming. This place sort of paused your time, I suppose."

"Why am I here?"

"It is for your safety."

"So, this is a prison."

"It doesn't have to be. I just need you to accept your reality."

"And what is my reality, Doctor?"

The Doctor stared at me. "If you have to ask, that's meant you still didn't get it."

My eyes widened as I realized something. "I'm still dying, aren't I?"

The Doctor flinched immediately and I know I was right.

"Even with the collar, I am still dying. It just stopped me from...splintering away." I said as I stared her down.

She didn't reply.

"I was right, wasn't I? That's why I am here in this...Time Vault. You put me...on pause."

She smiled solemnly at me. "500 points for (name)." she said, her joking tone fell flat.

I shook my head. "This is insane. This is all wrong. You have got to let me go."

"If I do, you will die."

"Maybe that's what I want!"

"You didn't mean that."

I didn't reply. I know it's pointless to argue with her, so this time, I'm the one who give her silent treatment.

She sighed and then she left. She left me alone for so long. The next time she come in, I almost felt relieved, craving for any company.

I know she did this on purpose. She wanted to put that Stockholm syndrome thing on me. But I won't let it come to that. It was a time like this that I wish I could actually do some meditation to clear my mind and stuff.

I think I go insane for a bit. I started talking to the shadow created by my slowly deteriorating mind. The books laid scattered on the floor, torn apart. So does the flowers and the vase and the table. I didn't destroy the ipod. Yet.

I started laughing at the song 'Sweet but Psycho'. It reminded me of the situation I'm in for some reason. And then I started crying. Then I threw away the ipod across the room. My emotion is all over the place lately.

The Doctor came in once in a while and she was nice and friendly one minute and shut me down next. I begged her to let me out of this room. I begged and promised I won't run. But she didn't believe me. I hated her so much at that moment and I yelled it at her. She left again.

I screamed and I cried. I demanded the Tardis to talk to me, to help me. But, of course, she didn't respond. Needless to say, I ruined the room again. I know the room will clean up by itself again later on, no matter the damage.

One day, the door suddenly showed itself. I had to blink my eyes a few times to make sure I wasn't dreaming.

"Run."

I heard the word in my mind and I did. I bolted out immediately. I have no idea the surrounding around me but the small light appearing on the corridor guided me somewhere to a another room....where a single hanging rope and a medium chair is waiting for me.

I frowned and then I giggled. I guess I did lose my mind because I walked toward it. I stood on the chair and fingered the rope that is fitting around my neck. I guess this is the only way I can escape. I kicked the chair and almost immediately the breath is knocked out of me as I struggled against the rope. It was painful and it took so long for me to black out completely.

Suddenly an alarm ringing loudly as I was about to black out. I could heard the Doctor screaming at me or the Tardis?

The Doctor pulled me down and laid me on the floor. She was crying. I almost feel sorry for her. She took off the rope and the collar.

Oh. So, that's why the Tardis did this. I suddenly having a realization. I wanted to laugh but I couldn't.

The Doctor pulled some injection and hit it on somewhere on my body and I gasped really loudly and coughed hard. She laughed and cried in relief at the same time. She hugged me tight. "Don't ever do that again, (name)! I can't lose you!" she begged me.

Whatever that injection is, it was a very good drug as I could feel the pain is gone. My hand rubbed the rope burn mark on my neck. I realized if I ever could have any control over the splintering, now would be the good time. As much it pained me to left her behind, I know my presence here is bad for her.

I could feel myself being ripped away right at that moment.

The heartbroken look on the Doctor's face seared forever in my mind.

7777

I stumbled down and someone caught me in their arms. I could see a visible blond hair and my blood ran cold. What if I was still with her? I screamed.

The owner of the blonde hair also screamed, more like in surprise than anything. It was then I realized it wasn't the Doctor.

I pushed the woman away from me and I ran blindly into another person who grabbed me firmly. "Let me go! Just leave me alone!" I screamed.

The man calmed me down. "It's okay. You're okay. You're safe." And somehow, I did calm down some but I was still sobbing.

"Doctor, who is she?" The woman I pushed asked. "She appeared out of nowhere."

"Doctor, I think she is hurt." Another voice said. It was a man. I recognized that voice. It was Jack Harkness, I think. "Look at her neck..."

The man who grabbed me pulled my hair aside and frowned when he saw the rope burn around my neck. "Who did this to you?"

I laughed hysterically. "I did this. I have to get her to take it off." I said. "well, I had help, isn't that right, old girl?" I looked up toward the ceiling

"Take what off?" Jack asked.

"Are you talking to the Tardis?" The Doctor asked in the same time.

"I guess she wouldn't know me, different Tardis, different Doctor." I said. "The Doctor, my Doctor...She has gone insane. I am too, I guess. She wanted to keep me even though I already died." I laughed again. "i'm going to die in pain, she said. I'm scared." I whispered. "The fam is dead too. She said she failed them. She put me on pause." I said and giggled at how ridiculous that sounded.

I know they are probably confused with my incoherent babbling but I really don't care. I told them about the collar and the Time Vault. Their Doctor is probably the only one who can put the pieces together from my rambling.

"Wait, I'm confused, some woman that has the same name as you did this to her?" Rose asked.

Jack's eyes widened as he glanced at the Doctor. He know a bit about Time Lord from his time as a Time agent so he knew about regeneration.

The Doctor nodded at Jack. "She is from the future. My future." He look troubled, probably feeling ill when he realized I'm a future companion and as I babbled on, spoiler that his future-self has gone insane.

I chuckled. "I might not. I could be from alternate universe. That has been happening to me, always alternate universe, always another Doctor. But never the correct Doctor. She said I should trust in the Doctor. I tried. But her future-self is torturing people even if she did it to the person who shot me. I can never go home." I said and I cried, wailing actually.

The Doctor awkwardly trying to comfort me. Of course, he wanted to know the mystery behind me even though I'm sick of telling it to the Doctor. But before I could, I finally recognized the somewhat tingling feeling as I was about to be ripped away once more.

7777

I dropped on my knees and coughed blood. Well, this is new.

"(name)? (name)!" A man rushed toward me. "Are you hurt? Where are you hurt?" He demanded as he check me for injuries.

I looked up to see the Tenth Doctor and he wasn't alone. He recognized me which I'm grateful because I think I'm going to throw up if I have to repeat everything again.

"Doctor, I think she is sick. She is coughing blood. And look at her neck! Is that...? Did someone strangle her with a rope?" The woman fussed over me.

The Doctor introduced me to Martha, a medical student. He pulled up my chin and asked with a very serious manner, "Who did this to you?"

I wanted to answer but I coughed up again and then I fainted.

7777

I was expecting to be pulled into another place but I woke up to the Doctor and Martha fussing over me at the Tardis medbay.

I have a clearer mind now. I guess my nervous breakdown has dissipated now. Plus it seemed I got a good rest from that fainting despite the blood bonus. I coughed up again. When I saw the blood, I chuckled. "So, it's finally happening..."

The Doctor stared at me. "What happened to you?"

"A lot. And frankly, I'm tired. I'm dying, I'm sure you know from the scanning." I said. "I went to the future, my future, and my friends are all dead and the Doctor is insane." I was being brutally blunt now.

Despite my words about his alternate version being insane, he seemed to be taking it well. "How can I help?" The Doctor asked instead as he took one of my hand in a gesture of comfort.

"A cure would be nice. A cure for what did this to me." I said. I told him to investigate their version of the scientist who did this to me. Chances are they would also developing the weapon used to shot me with. Hopefully.

The Doctor agreed with me.

"Tell me your finding when or if we meet again..." I said.

The Doctor and Martha looked at me in confusion.

I smiled weakly and waved goodbye at them as I felt myself being pulled to another place in another time.

A/N2: Ok, it's great if you read this till the end despite how bad this is. Just wanna say thank you for reading. Also thank you for those who follow my blog and has leave likes/comment/reblog on my past stories. I hope you will still stick around for some more painful reading.

#thirteenth doctor x reader #13th doctor x reader #thirteenth doctor imagine #doctor who x reader #doctor who fanfiction #doctor who imagine #dark!doctor #shiefenwrites

83 notes · View notes

cooltrainererika · 4 years

Text

Alt-talia Double Feature: A Prodigy and An Underachiever

YEEESSS I FINALLY FINISHED A FIC FOR @historical-hetaliaweek ! YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH-

I just hope people are still watching this blog!

So this is a double feature for Mirror, featuring Germany and Italy respectively. ...Yes, I write Germany way too much. While the Italy one was intended to come first, it turned out much longer than intended, as is common for my fics. But I thought this prompt could be utilized pretty effectively for both of my versions of them. A bit ironic. While they don’t have the same relationship they do in canon in my universe, comparing and contrasting them can still be extremely interesting IMO. Though the Germany ones is... a bit underwhelming and it isn’t much of a contrast. But I want to get these done.

I’m just glad I’m really starting to become engaged with my version of Italy’s character though! At first I thought his incoherence would as a country would be an issue preventing that, but it actually potentially adds to his character a lot.

Oh yeah, this is a semi-AU. Characters are pretty different, and everyone treats it as a normal thing. Special OOC warning for Prussia.

Also, while a “Veneziano” and “Romano” are mentioned, they are not North and South Italy. Yes, despite not being in the fandom for too long, I think, it does still look a bit weird to me, but they are completely different characters with different appearances. The “Italy” who is the main character here is simply Italy. Not North Italy, not Italy Veneziano, just Italy. This is extremely important. Also, for those who have read “Italy’s First Christmas”, I just want to say here that his relationship with South Italy (or Mezzogiorno) isn’t set in stone, so “Italy’s First Christmas” isn’t an accurate representation as of yet. Also, Italy has a sliiiightly different appearance. Mainly, his skin is more a tan, if not too dark, olive tone than super white, and he has somewhat more muscle definition; basically he resembles the Italian stereotype a bit more, but not too mannish either, probably. This is very relevant too.

I have debated using Italy’s human name, but yeah... this probably fits for now.

Also, Italy’s fic may have themes that aren’t suitable for all readers. While I do want to say what, I feel it might ruin the fic a bit, so I’ll just say discretion is advised.

Hall of Beginnings

“Deutschland?”

Those were the first words he had heard.

“Deutschland. Can you hear me?”

A strict voice, but clearly trying its best to sound gentle.

Something rough behind the softness that surrounded him.

His eyes fluttered open.

The first thing he saw was the face of a silver-haired man, his blood-red eyes staring at him as he held him in a way that struggled with delicacy. On his head was perched a fearsome, majestic black eagle, quizzically dipping its head down to see his face.

He looked around. There were so many people, all staring at him, their eyes wide. One stood behind the red-eyed one, his left eye covered by a monocle which the man flipped open to get a better view.

At the foot of the steps, a tired-looking man in white sighing in relief, and nearing to look at him was an old man with a distinctly regal air despite his widened eyes at seeing a child, one that was not there before, wrapped in the blanket in his nation’s arms.

And around them, stood many others that he sensed were like him and the monocled man and the man holding him.

The crowd dramatically stepped away, lowering their heads, allowing him a better look around the place.

The world he saw now was so beautiful; so much gold, so much pretty colors, so bright and shiny. And reflected in the walls, he saw himself, cradled firmly, surrounded by his kind and emperor and chancellor.

The silver-haired man was looking as well, as if taking the sight in.

The silver-haired man... his father.

Their eyes met again.

“Your name… it will be Ludwig. Welcome to the world, Ludwig Beilshmidt. Young Deutschland.”

“...Vater?”

His father held him close, tightly, his voice only enough for him and the monocled one to hear, shaking ever so slightly.

“Thank God… Thank God. I’ve fought so hard, just to see you born...”

His father looked like he could barely hold back his tears; the joy of a father, felt by few nations, for which he was fortunate enough to experience, overwhelming even to him.

The cheers of humans and state echoed in the hall.

“HAIL DEUTSCHLAND!”

————-

Germany and Prussia walked into the hall, the long table of nations, diplomats, and heads of state sitting, waiting for them.

Germany remembered this place; his first memory, surrounded by light and fanfare.

Now, he trudged to his table, trying his damnedest to keep a stoic face.

His archenemy limped to him on his crutches with conviction of a man who may as well had full use of his legs, the most evil, terrible grin on his face, the eye not covered by the bandages around his head shimmering with a sadistic, vindictive blue cocktail of wrath, pain, and contempt.

“You do know why I chose this place, right, Le Prodiget?”

“We agreed to sign a treaty. Let us get it over with.”

His father had raised him well with years of discipline; his voice was stoic, cold and emotionless, betraying none of what laid beneath.

“France, please don’t-“

France seemingly didn’t even hear England’s voice as he roughly, or at least as roughly as he could in his state, shouldered his hands off him, too busy savoring what he could from his rival’s defeat.

Germany remembered this place; it was his first memory. And the man in front of him knew that all too well.

France scoffed; his smile - he was not exactly a smiling man, even if more than Germany or Prussia - forced and barely holding back decades of condensed fury.

England looked on warily, shaking his head at his longtime rival, his children speaking among themselves nervously now that the glow of being given spots on the table had - at least somewhat - subsided, Scotland with an expression that spoke of him expecting his childhood acquaintance’s behavior.

Italy, the nation a mere decade older than him, fidgeted with his hands - was he nervous? Impatient? After all, he had already claimed his spoils of war, though it apparently wasn't enough from how he grumbled incessantly of his supposed lack of promised reward. At least he was on the winning side.

“You thought you were clever, didn’t you Papa chéri? Using my palace for the birth of your little brat? Well well, look at where we are now. I hope it was worth all the Parisians who starved and died to your cannons and bayonets. But how appropriate; this palace also used to be home to a certain man and society that I rightfully rid myself of. Papa chose well.”

Japan, the rising nation who had come to his lands to learn from him and his father mere decades ago, lacking much personal stake in the matter as he too had already claimed his spoils, yet seeming somewhat sympathetic at their state - or was it mock sympathy, as it was him who stole Tsingtao and those islands from him - sat quietly, his pen scratching against his notepad. At least the Oriental had returned his prisoners happy and healthy.

“So where did that Place In The Sun go, mon wunderkind? You thought you could be an empire? I admit, you did well. Papa chéri raised you well! ...For half a century.“

Prussia’s scowl deepened.

Poland, appearing stronger than he had ever known Posen now that he was one again, and currently the most joyous nation in the hall, silently goaded France, snickering, clearly just barely suppressing the desire to join in himself.

“You even were strong enough to beat up on a lady. Yes, he sure raised you well!”

Belgium looked on in silence as other stares directed themselves to her. Wallonia sat next to his country, the ferocity of his glare second only to France.

“Well... He has a point, sport.”

America pointed his pipe at her direction and winced empathetically; she was hardly in better shape than France.

England nodded; the reminder of what was done to Belgium was enough to let some disgust creep into his expression.

Germany grit his teeth. But he knew deep down they were right. She was just convenient. She had done nothing wrong. He resented that.

“Consider yourself lucky, wunderkind. Consider yourself lucky that because of certain allies of mine and spineless diplomats, I couldn’t make this the place I gave the upstart brat that is you what you really deserve!”

Alongside a restless Croatia and Slovenia, eyed resentfully at by Italy, a heavily injured Serbia from his wheelchair watched intently, if tiredly - while he too lacked stake in this treaty, the man's admiration of France could only be matched by his admiration for his giant cousin to the east - Bosnia sitting beside him.

Germany wished to scream it wasn’t him who shot the Archduke.

“Okay, that’s enough! Let’s not start another war here, okay? Okay!”

America, his cheerful voice cutting through the tension, finally managed to get his arm in front of France and usher him back to his seat, the man still glaring hellfire at the young nation.

The mirrors which the room took its name from reflected father and son, and their pathetic, defeated forms, surrounded by enemies, state and human.

But unbeknownst to his them, what they didn’t see reflected in the defeated nation’s tired eyes was the smolders of a wicked fire that would threaten to consume the world once more.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chi Sonno?

Italy finally finished buttoning his new jacket, taking it in as he gazed upon himself in his mirror.

He puffed his chest out, kicked up one leg, then the other, feeling the air against them, now without a long skirt or baggy pantalettes blocking them.

He caught himself about to stumble, but stopped himself before he snagged his new jacket and trousers on something. Whew!

He grinned. He felt so grown up!

Grown up…

His smile faded.

Staring back at him, who did he see?

He placed his hand on the mirror. His reflection did the same. The stray Italic curl bobbed by the side of his face. Staring back at him were his chestnut brown eyes.

Who did he see?

It was obvious; this was him. The Kingdom of Italy.

It started to dawn on him how baggy the jacket seemed. Strange, it should have been tailored to his proportions…

His eyes were drawn to his now half-exposed legs and knees; all the bruises, his bandaged right knee. Nations were supposed to heal quickly, he had heard.

No matter, they would be covered as soon as he put his boots on.

Just outside, the rest of his family waited. But yet, he felt like he heard their voices, their presence, their stares just behind him, like a dark miasma he couldn’t shake.

“It took you long enough.”

“Wonder how long it’ll take ya to mess it up.”

“Shit. Maybe shouldn’t ‘ve used good fabric!”

“Yuw cal this a navy?”

“No, no, I put too much hop’pe in ya. Just gonna need some time away at this Am’merica kid’s place since it's not like I’m gonna be gettin’ any less broke here. Just for a bit. C’ya.”

“Italia?”

Piedmont’s cool-tempered, but soft voice snapped him out of his trance, and he whipped around quickly.

A soft knock.

“Italia? Vhat is taking you so long? You neet help?”

“N-no, I’m fine!”

He sat, pulled on his boots, and gave himself one last look. His reflection stared back.

This would do for now.

————

Italy straightened his back, pulling on his Savoyan blue ascot so it was neat and taut. He couldn’t get the damn thing to not look uneven.

But he was a man now. It took him long enough; Germany was barely half a decade old and he had overheard Prussia talk about breeching plans.

But never mind that. This was his moment. And from what he knew of Prussia, it was much like him to go forward with the process so quickly.

The boy scrutinized everything with the finest detail, meticulously smoothing out every wrinkle and crease, combing through his hair, taking the utmost care to not snag the teeth in his Italic curl as he held it in his small, shaky hands, re-adjusting his scarf.

Thanks to his heritage, he had an eye for detail. Yes.

This would probably do, for the scarf. He picked up the stick pin on the stool, turning it over in his hand, carefully, slowly, for he didn’t want to stab his hand with one of these again.

The pin was a simple, but elegant thing, a humble silver star. He knew the symbol very well; a Stella D’Italia. It was an appropriate first pin, for his bright future would surely come, eventually.

He stuck it in, admiring how it shimmered.

Who was he?

The boy who stared back at him looked awkward in his adult clothing, no matter what he did.

The star seemed to shimmer so brightly; too brightly, as if it didn’t fit what it was attached to.

His face looked too effeminate. His arms were too thin. His light olive skin looked too pale; he wished he had inherited Mezzogiorno’s skin tone. He wasn’t standing straight enough. His voice was too high.

There was one incident, from a few years ago now, that stuck in his mind even now; as he often did, he was flattering a girl, not much older than he was at the time. Her response was a giggle and a joyful “You’re pretty too!”.

“Pretty”, like a woman. It was just an innocent mistake, he knew, and according to the boys from that school he had joined playing in the street later, she wasn’t known for being particularly bright, but…

He wished that when he looked into the mirror, he could see the grand empire whose blood ran through his veins staring back, not the effeminate, impotent coward who he was now seeing.

He shook his head, shaking off the feeling, pulling on the boots Piedmont had given him.

It would be fine. Everything would be fine. The fact that he had survived this long, unlike his predecessors who had faded away, stillborn, it had to prove he wasn’t a complete failure-

Then, he stumbled.

For those few fractions of a second, his arms flailed in the air for anything to hang onto, his room swirling around him.

CRACK

He yelled and jumped back as his mirror fell and shattered, fragmenting his visage with it.

“What was that?!”

“‘Nother broken thing? C’mon!”

He trembled, staring at his shattered reflection until he started hearing footsteps, and began cleaning it up.

Of course he messed up again.

————

Italy stepped in front of the mirror, finishing the last button on his shirt.

He looked nice in black, if he had to say so himself; it was a powerful, strong color, a jet black like a proud Arditi soldier’s fez.

Perhaps he could wear such a fez with this as well? He should definitely suggest it sometime. He would write it in his sketchbook before he forgot it.

He stood up straight, puffing his chest out. He felt stronger already.

Who did he see?

As he stared into the mirror, he thought he saw his visage change and morph, swirling and distorting to reveal his true self. His slender toned arms became more muscular, his bone structure thickened, his eyes grew sharper, his chest swelled, his skin tanned, his hair grew darker, swirling into espresso-colored curls, his Italic curl being replaced with two on different parts of his head, his simple uniform transforming into golden plates of armor. Magnificent, beautiful, yet so rugged and powerful.

He was the inheritor of Imperium Romanum. No, he was Imperium.

So many had tried to repeat his success, his glory, his prestige, but never had a rightful claimant to the throne risen to the occasion. Until now.

He would show them. They would regret betraying him, for mutilating his victory in front of his very eyes for all their sweet lies about him being a fellow great power.

And Romano, Piedmontese, Veneziano, Fiorentino, Lombardo, Genovese, Siciliana, Valdostano, even Mezzogiorno… he could finally be the temple of humanity, the utopia they wanted him to be. One who could convince Sarda that this was home, who could bring pesky little Bolzano to heel, who could be the home of all rightful Italian land, who could make the other Great Powers once again respect his might.

The Stella D’Italia would shine brightly from now on, finally leading the lost, starved sailor that was him to his destiny just as he had lost all hope.

It scared him. Surely, the Entente wouldn’t be willing to give away their precious power to an effeminate brat like him.

He cursed himself at the fear and the shiver the word “war” invoked. It would be gone soon.

Oh sure, he shouldn’t rush. That was going to be years down the line, probably decades. But one day, he would become the image in the mirror. Just like he was destined to be.

Who was he?

He was Ancient Rome. He was the Renaissance. He was this continent’s cradle of civilization, he was Italia.

He gave himself a satisfied smile, and made his way to the door in an almost skipping manner, singing a little tune.

He stumbled once, but it didn’t matter. He suppressed a wave of self-pity. He didn’t give a damn.

Or at least, there would come a day he wouldn’t. For, in this glorious dawn of a new era, it was finally within reach.

“♫Me ne frego

me ne frego

me ne frego è il nostro motto…♫”

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Some explanation for the characters (for those unfamiliar with Alt-talia) and historical stuff. Just don’t expect these for all my fics, at least not immediately:

Prussia: A strict father. ...So basically a lot like canon Germany, except probably less prone to loud anger. He’s basically where Germany gets his strictness from. Also, Gilbird is a full-grown eagle now. Yes, that’s Gilbird. Or “Kreiger”, as he’s known here.

Germany: He’s about... physically 1 - 3 years old in the first scene maybe? I liked of the idea of him being known as a “prodigy” or “wunderkind” due to him being so successful from the outset, and yeah, it sums up my interpretation of him pretty well. Also, hopefully I’ll be able to reuse my post title for a fic which actually contrasts him and Italy...

Monocled Man behind Prussia: Brandenburg. Since apparently monocles were a stereotypical Prussian thing for British people, and I can’t imagine Prussia having one constantly, I gave Brandenburg one.

Tired man in white: Otto von Bismarck. I read somewhere that apparently by the time of the ceremony, he was so tired and just kind of wanted it over with.

Regal old man: Kaiser Wilhelm I, obviously.

The two scenes depict the Proclamation of the German Empire and the Treaty of Versailles that ended WWI in the Hall of Mirrors in the Palace of Versailles, though I’m pretty sure everyone interested in history enough to be reading this knows. Then again I’m pretty sure the Germany fic was pretty straightfoward in general. Though this brings me to...

France: People tend to forget that as much as France and England’s rivalry is a central part to their character dynamics in canon, in this era France and Prussia/Germany were massive rivals for each other. He would hate this guy with a burning passion, and the fact that Prussia decided that he should be born in the Palace of freakin’ Versailles did not help whatsoever. He’s also extremely beat up from the war, as France’s land was massively scarred by the whole ordeal, and it lost as much as 4.29 - 4.39% of its population. Though I thought he would have a bandaged head and shoulder only, since most of the damage was in the north, I gave him crutches to emphasize it, as a reminder that he has a very good reason to be mad and as spiteful as he is. Honestly if he had it his way and he could he’d probably be strangling Germany here. I’m glad I’m finally getting to actually show the rivalry these two had, even if it is just a little bit at the end, instead of just the aftermath.

Oh yeah, IDK why the Bad Touch Trio is a thing. They allied and fought on the same side like once. Once. If anything, these three were often rivals. RIVALS. If they were competitive “friends” I could maybe forgive it, but they get a freakin’ song together? What? Spain was even Hapsburg for a while, I.e. the family that had a huge beef with the French royals. And Prussia? As you can see well for all of their modern relationship they did not get along whatsoever. Even during the pre-modern era, ever since the Reformstion Prussia was Protestant and France Catholic. Do you see the problem here? England and Portugal were the exception, not the rule. WTF is this BTT business about? If those three were best friends the continent of Europe would have been dominated with that monster of a triple alliance. I don’t understand.

Now, onto the less straightforward stuff:

While not conveyed fully due to POV bias, what France says here is true; Germany got it easy. Compared to what France got in 1871, what Germany got was extremely merciful. Britain and America and the others took pity on him and didn't go too hard. It's just that Germany was too high on nationalism (and on a character level, too young and naive to have any frame of reference) that he wasn't able to see that, especially by the 1930s. He and Prussia escalated the war, starting with brutalizing Belgium so bad the invasion and occupation was called the Rape of Belgium and he objectively violated her neutrality, others also suffered, and France, again, was beaten up severely and has a right to be pissed. France would have killed Germany if he got his way, or at least stripped him of so much he couldn't come back to start WWII.

Wallonia is the French speaking area of Belgium. Especially because of the status of women at the time, I’d imagine he often accompanied Belgium to official gatherings like this.

Japan is a bit detached from European Drama but he’s more just happy to be there sitting at the table with the other empires. Also unlike in WWII WWI Japan actually treated his POWs very well. Like while yeah they were prisoners I can imagine it was like heaven after getting out of being shot at on the muddy, grimy battlefield, because they obeyed humane standards on POWs to the letter. It was run like a summer camp, basically. He also took a lot of inspiration from Germany in nation-building, so I thought that despite basically opportunistically yoinking his territory while he wasn’t looking, maybe he feels a bit of pity for Germany here.

Posen was the fragment of Poland Prussia took. As of now the HC is that he was literally split into three people instead of just dying. I’d imagine he was treated as a punching bag by the German family and he got his territory cut up so of course he’s spiteful.

Croatia and Slovenia are restless because they didn’t really get what they want out of Yugoslavia; Serbia got the best deal, because he was liked the most by the Allies or something. Meanwhile Serbia is in a wheelchair because he lost anywhere from 16.7% to 27.8% (!!!) of his population. He absolutely got his teeth kicked in.

As for the second fic:

And then we have Italy. He’s less of a ditz, but much more of a klutz and can still be a bit scatterbrained and unfocused, especially before WWII. Also he has massive identity issues. I was a bit surprised to find how he somehow can come across as even more pathetic than his canon incarnation at times. Ironically he kind of is starting to look like a deconstruction of the canon version of the character. It’s also a bit surprising how his very boyish appearance actually kind of worked in my favor here.

He’s a klutz because the Kingdom of Italy wasn’t the most stable of nations, with regional identities pulling at the seams and the government a bit of a mess. His confidence issues are because Italian nationalists often were critical of their people, calling them effeminate and cowardly, i.e. they basically thought of their fellow citizens as a bunch of canon!Italies. It doesn’t help that he embarrasses himself with his clumsiness and that what with the failures in Ethiopia. A lot of people also still had strong regional identities and were skeptical of the United Italy experiment, so as soon as things started experiencing issues, i.e. immediately, they were also pretty critical of the idea. Hence his family being so toxic. Compared to Germany, so much just went wrong with Italy.

This started to be broken by victory in WWI, but that was when Italy learned he had to compromise. He was not happy. Hence Mutilated Victory. Despite what Hetalia will imply, Italy was as power hungry as any. As the first fic implies as he glares at Croatia and Slovenia, he wanted Yugoslavian land but got none. So just when his confidence was finally high enough he gets shut down, or so he thinks; again, like Germany, he's kind of high on his newfound nationalism and has no frame of reference. Then again Italy didn’t want to go to war in the first place, and he only did because of the supposed handsome land reward he’d be getting if he won. Yes, that is why Italy “switched sides”. Not cowardice, but because of good old fashioned “land, my dear boy!”. Not to mention the Triple Alliance was supposed to be defensive.

Changing clothes was seen as a huge part of childhood development; as the kid got older, he took on more adult clothes. At first kids wore dresses called frocks, before getting breeched when the parents decided he was old enough to wear them. As for breeching, to quote Wikipedia, "Breeching was an important rite of passage in the life of a boy, looked forward to with much excitement, and often celebrated with a small party." Italy in the first segment is getting breeched, in somewhere in the mid 1860s, where he's probably physically about 8. It’s also a bit symbolic, what with him going from a feminine looking piece of clothing to a more at the time masculine one. The second takes place in the mid 1870s and I'd say Italy is about in his preteens to early teens here, and Italy is a bit envious of how fast Germany is growing. In the last one he's an adult, about to march on Rome. So yes, the content warning at the start was referring to fascism, if that wasn't apparent. Manliness was a huge important thing in fascism and in general at the time. So Alt-Italy, also being a nation known for its machismo, wants to be a real man, not a boy. He can't grow up fast enough. Unlike canon Italy, he resents his perceived femininity and how he thinks the world sees him as that.

And oh yeah if you can't tell by that description if you're a GerIta fan you may dislike my fics lol.

Fascist Italy deemed itself the second Roman Empire and sought to re-create it. I mean imagine being the descendant of Ancient freaking Rome, that would be a lot pressure. While I still depict Italy as jolly and outgoing, his insecurities run very deep.

Italy's family in true Italian fashion is huge. The regions BTW are still alive today (I mean South Italy is a staple character after all), though the family is probably a lot less toxic now (but it's still divisive). Technically Piedmont could be considered Italy's dad in the way Prussia is Germany's dad, but in practice it's just a huge mess and he's functionally another uncle with somewhat more authority. Especially when Not-Lavinio-Romano joins. And Bolzano is South Tyrol; it was of course a bit of a thorn in Italy's side, and he never really considers himself part of the family because he speaks German. He (or I think he's a he?) probably still insists on his surname being Edelmann at this point, though no one in the family calls him that. Sarda is Sardinia, Piedmont's probable wife, but in reality she's pretty left out of this and doesn't get acknowledged by her husband much in favor of caring for Italy, despite the kingdom often being called Sardinia. So yeah, again, this family ain't healthy.

I ended up turning both stories end on the nation's reaction to the end of WWI and I just realized that.

#historical-hetalia-week2k20 #aph italy #aph germany #hws italy #hws germany #hws chibitalia #aph chibitalia #alt-talia #hws france #hws England #hws america #hws belgium #hws wallonia #hws japan #and others

16 notes · View notes

timetravellingshinigami · 5 years

Text

Warning! I've Watched The Movie!Endgame Spoilers ahead!!

I'm putting This warning because some of ya'll are mean saying "If you leak spoilers you deserve no rights!" F off!! If you read these spoilers and then get mad you deserve no rights!!!

Endgame review and rant starts from here.... Don't mind it starts out as a rant....

You would think!!!...

reading Endgame spoilers, writing Endgame essays and then watching the movie, would lessen the shock factor. Nah! You wrong af!....I watched the cam version of the movie today and when I saw Thor i was like..

And the worse! thing is he ain't fat because he was depressed. NO! He is fat because The Russos! wanted him to be funny! That was the only purpose for Chubby Thor!

Even in that video i could hear the audience laughing!!!! The little kids found it hilarious and i was sitting here at home and crying!!!!

You could see Thor's pain and anger when Banner said Thanos name but...

The Camera focused on his belly so much like "LOOK AT IT ITS FUNNY!!"

and I'm in floods of tears going "😭😭😭😭😭 NO it's not!!! Leave me alone please! 😭😭😭" It was painful!!! How could that they do this to him!

And he gives a little speech that he's fine and that he has no wish to be involved in helping the Avengers and he tells Rocket and Prof. Hulk to leave...but then Rocket says "there's beer on the ship" and Thor ups and goes with them????? Huuuuuuhhhhh!??????

And then for most of the movie the focus is on his beer belly and making him sound like an idiot!!!

Should Thor be depressed? of course!!! After everything he's gone through of course!! Should he gain weight being depressed? Yes! I GAIN WEIGHT WHEN I'M DEPRESSED!!! Being depressed and using junk food, alcohol, playing games all day will have this effect on you. But is him gaining weight!!! Something to laugh at??? NO!!!!

And Valkyrie???? In Ragnarok she went through the same situation Thor is in now. She was depressed and drowned her sadness in Alcohol. And then Thor came along and gave her her purpose back. Made her realise she can do so much more than wasting away on the Trash Planet.

And now Thor is in the same situation as her and...what? Valkyrie has been helping the Asgardians settle in Tonnsberg while Thor was drinking and eating junk food and worried about cable!!

But you know what Thor was never a dumbass!!! After what happened in the first Thor movie he was everything a good king would be. The reason he didn't want the Throne of Asgard on TDW was because he felt he could protect the nine realms better when he's not sitting on the Throne of Asgard. But when peace reigns he will gladly take care of his people.

What was all that character development in Thor 2011 and Thor: The Dark World and even in shitty Ragnarok all about?!!!! Actually i blame partly Ragnarok for Thor ending up.like this. Ragnarok was what started Thor as a comical character. The Russo just went "Its free real estate" and renovated on it and gave us Chubby Thor who couldn't even speak a complete sentence properly.

And that's not even it, what bothers me is that in the 5 years no one was helping Thor get better. Korg and Meik were pretty much enablers. Looking at things Valkyrie most probably tried to talk to him but he didn't bother to listen. And after a while she let him be hoping he comes out of his grief on his own. But, You know what pre Ragnarok Thor would listen to her. Pre Ragnarok Thor would not hide away and pretend nothing happened! Pre Ragnarok Thor would be grateful that he has people who care about him. He would do his best for the Asgardians he has with him now. Valkyrie and Korg and Miek are his closest people and he has their shoulder to cry on!! Especially Val. She does understand! and the entire time he was shutting himself away from the world, she helps the Asgardians get used to this new place. She also has hopes Thor will heal in time. She hasn't given up hope. I mean when all the Avengers were giving Thor looks of "oh, that is sad", she in the end has confidence in him. The movie never showed her thinking Thor is lesser of a man and king than he was before. She actually hopes for him to finally do right by his people.

What pisses me off is that Thor just goes off onto another adventure leaving Valkyrie with more responsibility than she already has (considering that now the whole human population is back and recovering from the IW events you can guarantee a whole host of problems are going to arise for the Asgardians. Considering how humans are you can bet on that.) The only way I can forgive Thor is if they give us a Thor 4 where he comes back to Earth with the remaining Asgardians (Hulk does say "we can bring them back") and finally decides to do some good for his people. Helps them have a better life, navigating human culture, learning new skills.

The Russos make Thor's grieve look like a joke! LIKE THOR DOESN'T EVEN CARE!!! RESPONSIBILITY??? NOPE THOR DOESN'T KNOW ANY OF THAT! you don't even feel sorry anymore or sympathise with Thor. You just feel ANGRY!! At the Russos and at Thor himself!!

Other things that hurt me...

Tony's death. It hurts just thinking about it! I feel it was unnecessary. There's no need for him to die. The Russos with all their imagination should have given him a happy ending! Natasha's death broke me first! Yeah you're gonna be a weeping mess after this. Steve was...*sigh*!!! It was sad and bittersweet. Did i like that ending for him? Not really 😢

Wanda doesn't get back Vision. Recently Elizabeth Olsen gave hints that the WandaVision series will be set in 1950s. I don't even know how that works out 😐

And Loki!!! You know how we thought he was ooc in Ragnarok? Nah! The Loki we see in Endgames New York 2012 is competing side by side with Ragnarok Loki on who is more ooc . I mean! He actually shape-shifted into Steve to mock him. He waved bye bye at the Hulk!! What??!! And then he just disappears and you're sitting there like "what the hell happen???"

What was good about Endgame?....

The rest of the movie was good. The humour was great when it didn't involve Thor. I'll never get over Scott in ant size sticking his ass out and saying "Flick me" at Tony😂 There were a lot of ass jokes. But it was find. Rocket and Prof. Hulk are my faves.

Thor meeting his mother was very emotional. Since she's a witch she immediately knew he was from the future. She doesn't judge him at all. She's just happy to see him.Their reunion was very sweet. A lot of tears and hugs. 😢In the end Frigga gives him a hug just before he leaves tells him in her sweet motherly voice "eat a salad" 😂😂 The only thing that was irritating here is Thor calling her "mom" 😕

For those who have been asking, there's a reason Thor had to sneak pass Loki 'cause of the time travel thing he can't allow himself to be seen by anyone. And Loki would definitely know this is Thor from the future. That would mess things up a lot.

Thor looked sort of better at the end when he was fighting Thanos. It would seem him summoning his armour, Mjolnier and the lighting also took care of his beard and hair. It's still long but braided 😕 He fought good. He was cool at the end.

Gamora is alive (Gamora from the past entered the 2018 timeline because of Thanos) !! 😄 And Quill is looking for her (He gotta make her fall in love with him all over)

And of course the fighting was epic as is expected. Cap wielding Mjolnier! When everybody showed up through Strange's portal!, Steve's "Avengers Assemble", Tony and Pepper fighting together!!! Wanda!! The Ladies of Marvel!! Captain Marvel!! 10/10(Tbh, Carol does look a little impatient the few times she was in the movie. Like she needed to be somewhere. I guess she has priorities. Other planets to protect. The moment she was sure Earth was safe she was gone.)

Not gonna lie, Endgame is epic and it is brilliant and amazing even with its flaws.

What's interesting is according to the Ancient One, if you move the stones from their proper place in the timeline it would result in a parallel reality being created. And of all the stone only the Space Stone has been moved from its place..by Loki. So that could mean a new alternate reality/universe has been created. And you know what.....That is actually scary. I wonder if the present universe Thor even knows that this other reality even exists where Loki is most probably alive. But even if he knows he wouldn't be able to do anything anyway.

Watching the movie, and seeing everybody fight together side by side, makes me miss Loki. It's like that scene where he takes the Space Stone and vanished sealed his fate somewhat. He's no longer connected to the timeline or universe we know. A new story exists for him. He's completely separated. And He's different now. He's probably still somewhat a villain with no redemption. He was never meant to fight side by side with the Avengers in this universe at least. Who knows how he turns out in the other universe. As matter of fact i wonder how everyone in the other universe turns out.

Looking at things i feel if Loki had been alive after IW, he will never be able to just settle down on Earth. And now Thor is the same too. They will probably just up and leave and travel. 'Cause for Loki especially, he's never going to be able to adjust with humans. The restrictions on him would be huge. I see him as the type who would leave through a hidden portal to other worlds.

I do feel like everybody's story hasn't really ended. Especially for Thor. He calls himself and Quills team as "Asgardians of The Galaxy" and if I'm not wrong there's a comic book of that name. Aside from that he, Quill and the team need to find Gamora and other Asgardians and return to Earth. And there better be a movie for that.

*Insert The Avengers theme song by Alan Silvestri*

102 notes · View notes

queenmorgawse · 6 years

Text

transmigration for dummies

mdzs scum villain au, chapter two. read chapter one on tumblr. fic on ao3. as always, credits for the og idea to @lee-luca.

Here’s a life lesson from yours truly : if you don’t give yourself time to think about it, you won’t worry about it.

Getting into Gusu Lan’s white robes is so much of a hassle that, as he struggles with the unholy number of layers and conventions, Jingyi has no time at all to mull over the OOC function or how to get rid of it as soon as possible. To think he used to complain when his mother wanted him to wear a dress shirt and a tie to family events — if she could see him now, she’d probably tear a muscle laughing.

Fortunately, Sizhui seems to take it all into stride. Or, more accurately, he thinks Jingyi’s still too out of it to properly function, and therefore sees nothing wrong with having to walk him through the process of putting his own clothes on step by step like he’s a toddler learning about shoelaces for the first time. He imagines the original would feel humiliated, but Jingyi himself is all too glad for a plausible excuse to ask for help to care. The System grants him this one favor, and stays mercifully silent as Sizhui secures his hair into a high ponytail and shows him the proper way to tie his forehead ribbon (I really can’t do it for you, he says, and Jingyi understands. There’s no helping the virginity ribbon.)

Speaking of hair, he’s got to figure out what to do with his. He hasn’t had a chance to look into a mirror yet, but he knows that this body’s hair reaches his waist. From the looks of it, it’s lustrous and well-cared for, but it’s still a huge change from Jingyi’s style, trimmed whenever it threatened to grow past a finger’s length. His head feels heavy.

Right as Sizhui pats a speck of dust off his shoulder and declares him ready to go, the chime of a bell echoes through the Cloud Recesses, which Jingyi guesses means breakfast is served. Oh, well. His hairstyle’s a problem for tomorrow-Jingyi.

Their dorm’s disciples make their way to the common hall in orderly fashion. In Jingyi’s opinion, they look like a row of ducklings toddling after Sizhui, to whom the younger boys cling to like he’s their father, mother and brother all wrapped into the same person. Truly worthy of being the protagonists’ son! Perhaps in someone else, he’d dislike the model student, can-do-no-wrong attitude. In Lan Sizhui, though, it’s endearing — admirable, even.

They reach the dining hall before Jingyi can elaborate on that train of thought. On the doorstep, he has to take a moment. The donghua’s version was gorgeous, but even it pales before the real thing. The hall is all dark wood, draped in blue and white and delicate silver, the cloud patterns of Gusu Lan running across the banners. There’s something engraved on top of the doors, which Jingyi assumes is the sect’s motto, Be righteous.

One of his fellow disciples squints at him and he realizes, belatedly, that the original has probably seen this place a million times before and wouldn’t bat an eye at the scenery, no matter how enchanting. He immediately puts on the most dazed look he can manage, letting his eyes go blank, until the other boy turns away with a shrug.

Damn right, I’m a weirdo! Leave me alone!

The most anyone here seems to open their mouths for is to exchange quiet greetings, and Jingyi’s not quite comfortable enough with his surroundings to attempt it. What if he accidentally offends someone important? That’ll be the end of him for sure. Instead, he busies himself with trying to identify characters among the gathered disciples.

As it turns out, the task isn’t much of a challenge at all. The main branch of the Lan clan sits at the same table, though it does not particularly stand out among the others save for the cloud-patterned banners hanging directly above it. The guy in the middle must be Lan Xichen, Jingyi guesses, if only because of the respect others address him with, obvious even though he can’t hear their voices from where he stands.

From what he can tell, the unsmiling man sitting to Lan Xichen’s right is Lan Wangji, the main love interest. The intuition is further confirmed when Sizhui excuses himself from their group and flits to his side. Father and son barely exchange a few words, their dark heads bent together, but Jingyi could swear he sees Lan Wangji’s eyes soften a little.

He really does look sad. It’s not like Jingyi didn’t know, having read an entire novel about it, but seeing it for himself still makes his heart tighten in his chest a little. Worry not, Hanguang-Jun! he wants to say. Your future husband is coming back real soon! But of course, the System would probably nuke him instantly if he tried to, so Lan Wangji will have to be miserable for a little while longer.

“Come sit with me,” Sizhui’s voice says, and for the second time in less than two hours, Jingyi snaps himself back into reality to come face to face with the other junior’s kindly face.

It’s pretty wild how much effort Sizhui puts into being nice to him. Is it because he was there when Lan Jingyi was hurt? Does he feel responsible for him now? It’s not like the original was exceptionally pleasant to be around. He really does have to do something about it ⎯ or at least, he’ll take care of it when the System’s no longer on his ass about remaining in-character.

When Sizhui doesn’t seem to come to his senses and retract the offer, he hesitantly settles into the seat on the other’s left. Hopefully, everyone will just chalk up the delay in each of his movements to typical post-traumatic event confusion. What even happened on that night-hunt?

The silence that reigns in the dining hall is eerie, only disturbed by the clink of chopsticks against ceramic bowls and the occasional whispered thanks when a dish is passed down the table. It reminds Jingyi of an exam session, which does nothing to help his nerves.

He’s in the middle of his second bowl when the alert chimes in his head.【OOC behavior detected : -10 points. Current balance : 90 points. 】

What the hell? I didn’t do anything!

【The original Lan Jingyi never manages to stay silent during meals, effectively breaking Gusu Lan Sect’s two hundred and fifty-third rule. Points were deducted accordingly. 】

Was this even mentioned? Now you’re just pulling canon out of your ass! When the System doesn’t answer, Jingyi adds, plus, he’s sick, he doesn’t feel up to talking. It’s weird to refer to someone who’s technically himself in third person, but he can’t help it. He and the other guy probably wouldn’t be friends if they met, nevermind body roommates!

【... 】For the first time since Jingyi arrived, the System sounds somewhat irritated.【Objection considered : +5 points. Current balance : 95 points.】

A wide smile worms his way onto his face. So he can negotiate, huh? Jingyi’s always been pretty good at debate ⎯ he verbally wiped the floor with Huan Hua High’s team last competition, okay? He can definitely duke it out with an omniscient AI!

...Put like that, it sounds a little more daunting than before. But if he doesn’t want to end up booted off into a potentially dead body, he doesn’t exactly have a choice either.

Out of sheer spite, Jingyi finishes the third and last bowl of his breakfast in stubborn silence.

He shouldn’t have underestimated the soporific effect of a never-ending lecture. God, and he thought two-hour classes were bad. It's been three, and his soul feels like it's going to throw itself out of the reincarnation cycle.

Jingyi steals a mournful glance towards the window. The sun is shining outside, dammit! This is no time to keep children indoors! Yet Lan Qiren drones on, pacing back and forth in front of them and reading from one of too many foot-long scrolls, seemingly oblivious to his students’ boredom.

Why does he even have to be here? He was born a Lan, he’s supposed to know these things already! Jingyi conveniently ignores the fair point his brain raises (how the original must have known, but Jingyi himself could only recite a handful if he tried) in favor of complaining that, if pointless, is at least relaxing.

One of the Jiang guest disciples is dozing, head strategically propped up and brush in hand to give the illusion of attention. Lan Qiren hasn’t noticed yet. God, I wish that were me.

As if to offer convenient narrative contrast, Lan Sizhui and perhaps a couple others are making a valiant effort to stay focused on Jingyi’s other side, dutifully taking notes. Even Sizhui’s eyes have started to glaze over, though, and when their gazes meet (the umpteenth time Jingyi lets his sweep over the room in an attempt to spot something of interest before he bores himself to death), the other boy actually slumps a little before sitting up ramrod-straight again, just in time to look pristine when Lan Qiren’s eyes sweep over him.

It’s kind of reassuring, to see that even the Lan clan’s resident golden boy is a little imperfect.

Just as Jingyi glances down at the dregs of his notes, wondering if it’s worth it to pick them up again, chaos erupts on his right. Random-Jiang-Extra’s steadfast elbow pose has finally failed him, sending him crashing onto the table. Ink spills everywhere, drenching his notes, the lapels of his robes and even the hem of his neighbours’. Jingyi saves his in extremis by scrambling back, almost knocking over his own desk in the process.

The guest disciple blinks, like he doesn’t realize yet the magnitude of Lan Qiren’s wrath about to descend upon him. There’s a rather large smudge of ink on his chin. From a distance, it could pass for Lan Qiren’s goatee.

Jingyi snorts before he can think that decision through.

Beginner’s mistake. Lan Qiren turns towards him, eyes narrowing, and his laughter dies in his throat. “Do not laugh at others’ plight,” their teacher fumes. “Three thousand and fourth rule, Lan Jingyi! I postponed the punishments for your previous offenses on the grounds that you needed time to recover, but since you’re obviously well enough to embarrass our sect again, you won’t need that delay after all!”

I don’t even know what the other guy did! Jingyi almost protests, but since that objection just sounds like it’ll get him hit with another rule about not telling lies or whatnot, he keeps his mouth shut. Instead, he bows his head and says, “Sorry, Teacher. I’ll try my best not to do it again.” Screw his pride! Anything to escape copying rules! Especially not while doing handstands!

Not to the original’s credit, Lan Qiren looks, for a moment, genuinely surprised. Not for the first time, Jingyi feels a small stab of resentment towards Lan Jingyi. He’s been trying not to, given that he has no idea what happened to the guy’s soul and he may be in a worse situation than Jingyi is right now, but why couldn’t he have been a good, well-behaved student like Lan Sizhui?

...In retrospect, maybe it’s just as good that he wasn’t. Jingyi would have gotten way too many points deducted just because he couldn’t sit still in class.

【OOC behavior detected : -10 points. Current balance : 85 points. 】

Ouch. Must be for the apology. Well, if it saves him from the dreaded handstand copying, he can make up for the loss later.

Against all odds, it works. Lan Qiren rubs the bridge of his nose, stifling what Jingyi is fairly sure is meant to be a long-suffering sigh. “One copy of our sect rules, to be done in the Library Pavilion. Lan Sizhui will supervise you...after his guqin lesson, is that right?”

“Yes, Teacher.” If Sizhui’s annoyed to have to take time out of an assumedly free evening to watch him butcher calligraphy, he doesn’t show it. From the look in his eyes, though, it may not be the first time.

Jingyi tunes out of Lan Qiren’s next tirade, directed at the hapless Jiang boy, who’s still staring at his ruined notes as his martial brothers make sympathetic noises. Can’t say this day started out all that well, but it’s not that bad for a beginning. It definitely could have been worse.

Then Lan Sizhui gives him a tiny smile that carves a dimple into his right cheek, and maybe today really is going to be a pretty good day after all.

strolls in with starbucks almost a month later,,, hello, i haven’t abandoned this fic, mini exam period just punched me harder than expected. i hope this chapter wasn’t boring - i’m trying to set things up before the actual mdzs plot kicks in, but we’re in for some zhuiyi fluffTM. also, i made a twitter! feel free to follow me over there for random au ideas (but mostly crying). still taking questions + prompts, both here and there. and finally, would you guys read a more serious / plotty / angsty fic with ljy x jl as the main ship (though romance would probably take a backseat to the plot)? i wrote a small premise over here, but i crave feedback and validation.

#mo dao zu shi #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #mdzs #lan jingyi #zhuiyi #kim's fics #transmigrator!ljy

111 notes · View notes

chwrpg · 5 years

Text

Mom! I'll be right behind you in the hearse!

A NOTE FROM ADMIN R: Again, we had quite the battle of the CHW all stars for this character but in the end, I had to give Arden to miss Tiff. You put everything into this application and I loved that. I have such a clear vision of who this character is going to be in your hands and I am so excited for everyone to get to interact with this incredible being you’re putting onto our dash. Thank you Tiff for this application.

OOC NAME/ALIAS, PREFERRED PRONOUNS, AGE & TIMEZONE:

It’s Britney bitch, she/her, 25, CST

DESIRED CHARACTER:

Arden Atkins

HOW ACTIVE WILL YOU BE?

7-8

SECONDARY CHOICE:

DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER:

From the very second she entered the world the odds had always been stacked against Arden. Unlike most of the people she rubbed elbows with on the streets of Rosewood she hadn’t been graced with the good fortune of being born into wealth or power. There was no trust fund for her to fall back on or family business to take over. No, all Arden had to look forward to inheriting somewhere down the line was a pile of clothes from Goodwill and a beat up old trailer home that barely fit one person, much less the three women who currently lived in it; that was if they managed to even pay it off. Though who knew how long that would take since they could barely afford it as it was; based on her grandma’s disability checks, her paycheck from her job at Mallrats, and her mom working as a hair dresser. Still, for as unfortunate a hand as she was dealt, Arden never once showed or expressed dissatisfaction about having less than others. The way she saw it there was always someone out in the world who had it worse than her. Someone with even less privilege than her. And besides what was the point in wasting time whining about things when she could go out there and make it happen for herself? Some would attest her outlook on life to naivety, they liked to write her positivity off on the fact that she was still a child who hadn’t yet had a chance to see the world for what it really was. While others just believed she was a stereotypical blonde airhead who never had a care in the world. But in actuality it was because of the things she had grown up seeing, the hardships her family had lived through, that Arden chose to always bear a smile instead of putting up a wall or having her fists held up to the world. She just preferred to believe that all of her trials and tribulations could be turned into positive experiences; lessons to be learned, things that would help mold her into a stronger and more intelligent person. No, her life wasn’t perfect by any means, even when her family was whole. But she would be damned if she let herself become a victim of circumstances.

Just because she was content with what she had didn’t mean she was willing to settle. As much as she appreciated everything her mom had done and overcome to get their family out of the hole her dad had dragged them into she didn’t want to follow in the woman’s foot steps. Because she grew up with practically nothing that she wanted everything. In an ironic turn of events, that she didn’t like to dwell on too much, her drive for more sometimes even mirrored her fathers gambling habit. Except instead of placing everything she had on risky hands she chose to play them all. Odds were that the more doors she opened the more chances at success she would have. Arden didn’t believe in dumb luck, that went out the door the same day her dad and his bullshit did. What she believed in was creating her own luck. After all, as the great Oprah Winfrey herself said “luck is a matter of preparation meeting opportunity.” And she was more than prepared to do whatever it took in order to achieve her dreams. While other doors were closed to her others opened and she came to soon understand that the pageant circuit was somewhere she could get a foot in the door to propel not only her career but herself personally.

SAMPLE WRITING:

It’s lonely at the top…

It was something she had heard a couple of times in those melodramatic teen dramas growing up. One of those lame one liners that she would always find herself snorting over because from the outside looking in the solutions to their problems were literally right in front of them. But as cheesy as it felt quoting and comparing herself to a CW protagonist it seemed that what her life had started to become since beginning her pageant reign. The more titles she racked up the less and less it seemed like people wanted to be around her. And everyone seemed to have an opinion. Some welcomed her with open arms. Mostly the judges and sponsors who were looking to mold her into their ideal spokeswoman for whatever flat tummy tea or hair care vitamin they were trying to push on Instagram. Her competitors though? Not so much. She wasn’t from their world. As far as they were concerned she didn’t belong.

The blonde had come from nothing. Her family had no connections, they had no money, they barely even had a home to call their own. It probably didn’t help that to this day, with several competitions under her belt, she still showed up with handmade evening gowns and press on nails from Target. Others had been entered in pageants from the moment they could walk. They paid thousands of dollars for pageant coaching, and dance classes, hair pieces, spray tans, make up, and even fake teeth. While the most experience she had was binging a couple of seasons of Toddlers and Tiaras and watching Miss Congeniality with her mom at least once a month growing up. Walking in like a dollar store Barbie was a slap in the face. How dare she think she could just waltz in and act like she was hot shit?

Those were some of the nicer things that were said about her.

Yes, Arden was aware of the murmurs behind the scenes about her. There wasn’t any gossip around town that her mom’s best friend Loretta wasn’t in the know about. So it didn’t take very long for them to find just how vicious not only the fellow contests, but also surprisingly their mothers, could get with just their words. They were like vultures who searched for any scraps of their prey they could find to dish out. And she was an easy target for them. A hot topic that had spread like wildfire backstage was her family’s past. Her father’s history of unsavory habits wasn’t hard to track. The man had racked up a debt so large and conned so many people in Rosewood out of money that he saw no other choice than to run from his problems before they caught up to him, effectively leaving herself and her mother caught in the crossfire.

But Arden wasn’t one to sit back and concede because things got tough for her. No, she was the girl who made dream boards and hung them up on her walls so every morning she could be reminded of what she was working for. She was the girl who not only made goals but came up with a game plan on how she could achieve them. And made back up plans and back up plans for her back up plans. People could say whatever they wanted about her all that mattered was that she stayed true to herself, that her family would be proud of her, and that she put her all into everything she did. Maybe that was why she excelled at pageants from the minute she first stepped onto the stage. The way her mother recalled the moment it was like a hurricane storming her way through the rest of the competition.

There was, however, a tougher hurdle to cross and that came in the form of Beverly Leon and her mother. If Arden was a hurricane then Beverly was a whole damn tsunami. She wasn’t sure what she had done to get on their shit list but ever since she had walked in to first compete they had gone out of their way to knock her down at every turn. And . their fire only seemed to be further fueled the night of the Miss Windy City pageant. The night she finally managed to ‘snatch’ the first place title from Beverly’s hands, the rightful owner as the girl’s mother had so eloquently told her in that sickly polite tone she used in front of the other moms and even some judges when she was letting them know she wasn’t pleased. How someone could manage to make underhanded threats sound like simple backhanded compliments kinda scared her. But in a weird way also excited her. If the top of the food chain thought of her as a threat that meant she had to be doing something right.

The Q&A portion had gone smoothly. They always asked the same questions like where the girls saw themselves in ten years or what they would do if they were President for the day. And as she was still learning the answers never really strayed far from ending world hunger or ensuring world peace. There was a specific set of do’s and don'ts. Things the judges like and don’t like to hear. It was this portion of the competition that Arden felt she truly played it. She felt like she knew what the judges were looking for. They were looking for someone who could become America’s next angel. The poster girl for what it meant to be all American. Or at least their old school version of America. That much they made clear when they announced the theme cor the pageant would be Land of the Free. While they tried to be progressive in some respects there were clearly other aspects of pageantry that were behind on the times. Still. it was somewhere Arden felt like she could make a difference. It was where she could flex that 4.0 GPA that she had worked her ass off to maintain. Where she could show that she was as well spoken as Diane Sawyer and as insightful as Oprah. Where she could prove that yes she had the looks but there were brains behind those looks as well.

Her question that night? Who was her greatest inspiration?

“My greatest inspiration would have to be my mother. A God fearing woman who has learned to bring herself and her family out of less than favorable circumstances with hard work. Her strength to work full time but still be a diligent homemaker is what is a true testament of what women can accomplish if we truly set our minds to it. I hope to inspire people the same way she has inspired me be it with a child of my own or any child in need…” There was more to her answer but she could barely remember all the fluff she spewed.

What she didn’t mention in her response was that while her mom inspired her it wasn’t only through her hard work. But in the way that Arden was constantly reminding herself not to walk down the same path as her. Her mother gave up on her dreams for a man. She let herself be defined by his words and actions. And when she had been left with nothing but broken pieces of a family she had to pick up and glue back together on her own. She loved her family more than anything, she was proud of where they had ended up after everything. But she didn’t want to have to go through anything like what they went through ever again. It was exactly why she had cut off communication with her dad all those years ago. It took a while but she got past

Afterwards, while she was fixing her dollar store lashes from falling off she was caught off guard when a soft voice called to her from a couple of feet over. “Hey. I really liked your answer up there. You know, about your mom being your inspiration. I especially like how you added in the part about the children in need, total tearjerker.”

“Thanks. I almost went with Black Widow because you know, everything now a days is an Avengers reference.“ She teased, flashing a sincere smile at Luna. Though by now she knew that talk of her family had spread around the pageant circuit. Those who didn’t look down on her like she was garbage looked at her with pity. And she couldn’t help but reactively defend her mom and grandma. “I meant what I said up there though. It isn’t easy to rise back up from nothing. I believe that those who make something out of nothing are the real heroes.”

“Hey, girl, you go out there and live your truth. Personally I’m more of an X-Men gal. At least you didn’t get stuck with a shitty question like what’s your favorite season. They say there’s no such thing as wrong answers. But you know they’re deducting points if you don’t automatically say summer. Because, you know, independence and what not.” She shrugged coolly.

“You know, when I started I heard a rumor there was a frontrunner for a pageant who got all of the top scores. And the only reason she didn’t win was because she was an Aries. Is that for real?“ Arden asked.

“She was a Gemini actually.” Luna retorted jokingly.

Arden chuckled, happy she was able to talk to someone who didn’t seem like her life only revolved around the competition or winning.“So what about you? Who would you have said your greatest inspiration was?” She knew that Luna was probably just making small talk, maybe even trying to judge her competition. But Arden was genuinely curious about this girl. Luna was beautiful, seemed lively, and had the same air of determination she recognized in herself.

For the next twenty minutes until they had to go back on stage they sat there and chatted. It had just started out as small talk but the longer it kept on the more they divulged with each other. Each others reasoning for entering the pageants, their lives, their interests. It was just so easy to talk to Luna. She even told Arden about her brothers move to New York and how she wanted to someday follow in his foot steps. Talking to her was almost comforting. It felt like they had been friends all their lives.

That was the same night Beverly had “accidentally” tripped her on their way backstage to change into their outfits for the talent portion of the show. The same night she began to realize just how vicious these competitions could truly get.

ANYTHING ELSE?

1985

#accepted #submission

2 notes · View notes

sanrionharbor-blog · 5 years

Text

For Everybody Still Worried About the Leaks

Clues from the Cast Interviews, GRRM Hints, and My Own Gut Feelings

Disclaimer: Hey, nobody knows nothing, but life’s too short to stress about things we can’t control, and stories are supposed to be maps to help us learn more about ourselves and about life in general–not hair-pulling inducements. So I’m going to enjoy all the speculating that I can regarding the GOT season finale, and want to share some thoughts on why I think certain “leaks” are most likely bunk.

I’m mostly focusing on the pervasive “Does Tyrion die by trial?” leak, and everything that links to that, including any betrayals or major deaths.

Tyrion’s Ending and The Ending, In General

First, let’s quote Peter Dinklage himself:

I had all these ideas in my head and a version of one of them is how it ends up [for Tyrion]. David and Dan have a brilliant version of what I had. If I use any adjectives it will give it away. But I love how it ended up. And how it ends up for everybody. They had a beautiful gentle touch with some, and a hard touch with others.

But that’s just on Tyrion’s ending. Before I get into what that quote tells us, let me quote what other people have said about the Overall Ending of Game of Thrones:

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau:

I’ve never read anyone who got the whole thing. And when I read it the first time, I was blown away.

George R.R. Martin:

So many readers were reading the books with so much attention that they were throwing up some theories, and while some of those theories were amusing bulls*** and creative, some of the theories are right…At least one or two readers had put together the extremely subtle and obscure clues that I’d planted in the books and came to the right solution.

What the above quotes tell me is:

No one has guessed the ending completely–but parts of the ending? Yeah, they’ve been guessed. Which just goes to show how much this show and its themes have resonated not only with GRRM, but with his audience. Because,as a writer, I can tell you that no storyteller tells a story alone. There’s something guiding us and we can’t put a finger on it but it’s often the source of our best ideas. And it’s the same ineffable something that stirs all of us when we’re creating, sharing, and participating in stories. It’s the reason you see the same patterns in stories over and over. In short, the fact that part of the ending CAN be guessed is NOT a bad thing. It’s natural. Some postmodern storytelling theories have taught us that tricks and surprises are where it’s at–but a story isn’t true unless it can surprise us and, in retrospect, give us the only answer that makes any sense. You can see a pithier version of this kind of storytelling in Ye Olde Riddle–for example, the Sphinx in Oedipus Rex could tell us the answer to her riddle is orange, and that would throw us for a loop, but it would tell us nothing and mean nothing and add nothing to the story and thus would be forgotten. Surprise doesn’t count unless it has a ripple effect. So, about-face turns and OOC arcs may shock and subvert, but they’ll ultimately end up as dross and not as gold. (But hey, more on my thoughts on what can and can be accepted as canon in the last blurb below!).

Now, has anybody assumed that Tyrion would betray Daenerys and end up dead simply for 1) loyalty to the Lannisters, 2) suddenly losing faith in humanity?, or 3) suddenly wanting to usurp power himself? No. This is not a popular theory by a longshot. Tyrion dying? Sure. Somebody betraying Daenerys? Sure. Tyrion as a ruler? Sure. But this very specific, shoehorned version of the story is simply too contrived to have been picked up by fans organically.

The leaks so far have painted nothing but harsh endings for ALL the characters. Don’t tell me those leaks are pro-Stark. Those leaks point out backstabbing, loneliness, and emotional stagnation–forget what characters live, think about what these leaks have said about these characters. Not only does this not jive with the “bittersweet” aspect of the ending, it doesn’t jive with Dinklage’s assertion that, while some characters will go down harshly (R.I.P. Missandei especially–at least Edd and Jorah and Beric got heroic deaths and funerals), others will be treated gently. A heartbroken Brienne? A cold, lonely, manipulative Sansa? A suddenly hopeless, headless Tyrion? I don’t think so. (I also don’t think that means that Brienne and Jaime will necessarily ride into the sunset–but I do think we’ll have Jaime’s feelings for her confirmed, along with the completion of his redemption arc. I also don’t think that means Tyrion definitely won’t die–but I don’t think he’ll be character assassination, either. And I also don’t think that Sansa WILL end up in a canon relationship–but, logically, they can’t leave all the Stark’s COMPLETELY UNABLE TO LOVE, and um, somebody has to be willing to have legitimate heirs to the Stark House. Ok, just to continue this aside, but it seems theoretically impossible to me that the Stark House, which is all about the continuation of the Starks and the independence of the North, would not be given any canon marriages/alliances at the end of their arc. Arya’s already rejected marriage, Bran drove Meera away, and Sansa’s always wanted a happy marriage, even if she’s got very understandable trust issues right now. Anyhow–).

Peter Dinklage was able to guess how his character arc ended. What are the odds that Betraying Somebody He Cares About Without Good Reason (Daenerys–I could see him betraying her reluctantly, but not easily)/Being Betrayed By Somebody He Cares About (Sansa)/Dying Guilty After All The False Trials His Character Has Been THrough were in the mix? I don’t think so. Dinklage has gone on record multiple times to say how much he admires Tyrion and thinks he’s a good person. He’s also gone on record stating that Sansa and Tyrion’s relationship is full of true affection. Even if Tyrion dies and/or he and Sansa don’t end up as a couple, betrayal just seems so far out of the scope of what these characters’ storylines have been building to. And again, I can’t see that being even one version of one of Dinklage’s headcanons. What I think is most likely? A) Hand to the Ruler, B) Part of a new council that replaces or supplements the King/Queen, C) the King himself, or D) a heroic death.

How Long They’ve Planned the Ending:

They had talks with GRRM in 2014

They’ve been planning the ending for five years

They’ve known it was Arya who would take out the NK for three years

So some decisions weren’t set in stone, even by GRRM (such as who would take out the NK…an interesting thing not to know, actually, but that just points out how inflated the importance of the Others/White Walkers was–do I still think it will be handled better by GRRM, yes, but that’s another story), and even if D&D’s execution feels more like “here’s an outline of what’s happening” rather than “here’s the organic progression of that storyline,” I can only imagine that if core pieces were given by GRRM AND they’re not completely winging it, then there will be a certain amount of narrative cohesion once this comes full-circle.

Let’s not forget, we still have a third WTFudge moment that was came straight from GRRM himself, with the other two shockers being Hodor’s origin and Shireen Baratheon’s death. Could this third twist be Dany going completely mad? Maybe, though it doesn’t fall into the same category of completely-unexpected-but-honestly-possible, like Shireen and Hodor. Only because the foreshadowing for Dany’s madness was heavy-handed in the last few seasons (taking away the ‘unexpected’ bit), and is now quite uneven here in Season 8.

I think the third twist will likely be a specific action (a la Shireen’s death) or another origin story-type twist (a la Hodor). Some people have speculated that “Tyrion’s Trial” would make for that final twist, but here’s why I don’t think so:

The Nature of the Leaks

It’s very interesting to me that this leak, supposedly this Huge Most Important Leak, was one of the very first ones released. Like, months ago. While the rest of the leaks, the ones that have actually been accurate, are usually only released at the max a few days before each episode airs.

It’s also interesting to me that HBO has not done more to shut down this particular leak.

And, I would not put it past HBO to have actually filmed one entire fake-out scene. Most of the Dragon Pit/South scenes were filmed after the first three episodes, so they probably knew that they had the time and money to just throw fans for another loop. Sound tinfoily? Perhaps, but the idea that this big twist–and a twist that so far doesn’t make much sense given what we’ve seen in what is now ⅔’s of the season–was such an easy leak just makes me suspect.

Another possibility? Tyrion IS on trial, but is pardoned. Or Tyrion thinks he’s on trial, but it turns out to be somebody else’s funeral (a la that Littlefinger Fake Out 2.0.). I’m not saying any of this makes for the best handling of his character or for a particularly compelling scenario, but considering we haven’t seen it, I can’t say for certain.

GOT’s Recent “Plot Twist” Pattern

D&D have switched to information-withholding tactics in the last few seasons. Just look at Sansa and Arya’s arc and the Littlefinger Fake Out. Were these well-written? Not entirely–but they don’t make for the worst entertainment either. Yeah, we had better quality storytelling in the first four seasons, but soap opera can still be fun.

And how long have they been teasing Dark!Sansa without actually delivering? And let’s not forget–show-Sansa’s arc is still, broadly, based on book-Sansa’s arc. Book-Sansa remains far more in tune to the archetype of the Lady/Maiden, while show-Sansa is slightly blended with Jeyne Poole’s arc (and, unfortunately, a dash of Pop Feminism). But the fact remains that whatever meeting D&D had with GRRM back in 2014 contained information based on the broad trajectory of Sansa’s arc as GRRM has been writing it. (I’m writing a character arc meta on Sansa that’ll be out…soonish).

And let’s just say I don’t see Dark!Sansa hinted very well in the books at all. Sansa learning to pull strings like Littlefinger and Cersei and Margaery? Heck yes. But Sansa will do it Sansa’s way.

So, given that D&D usually try to shock us by hinting at a character’s worst possible tendency AND by withholding information AND by trying to get us to see one scenario while giving us another (another example being Jon Snow vs. Night King actually being Arya vs Night King), I can very well see them turning Sansa into a reluctant last-minute ally of Daenerys, Tyrion being pulled out of hot water at the last minute, Jaime’s running to Cersei being about taking out Cersei not making out with Cersei (yeah sorry/not sorry about that one), and heck, maybe Dany won’t go mad–she’ll just realize she doesn’t want the Iron Throne anymore, or the Iron Throne shouldn’t exist, or she dies tragically but not as a monster. Time will tell.

Who We Haven’t Seen So Far That Can Introduce New Complications

1. Edmure Tully

Tobis Mennzies (Edmure Tully) has been confirmed to return this season. Could it just be a cameo? Maybe. But I wouldn’t put it past Sansa, Arya, and Bran to be planning a back-up plan to help out Jon (and thus Dany). Arya is probably planning on killing Cersei, Sansa can rally what’s left of the Tully’s, and Bran will hopefully do something Three-Eyed Ravenish (or regain some of Bran’s humanity–which would be a twist worth waiting for).

2. Khal Drogo

Motherhood is an important theme in Dany’s life. I think ultimately, book and show wise, it’s what’s truly important to her. She just doesn’t realize it. In this way, Dany is a very interesting parallel with Cersei. Both of these women are tempted to replace their intimate losses with power. They believe power will protect them and their own. And that mentality can slowly shift into the classic Mother Bear conundrum: Us vs. Them.

Now, Khal Drogo not only represents a happy time in Dany’s life where she was both powerful and protected, but where she was a mother. After her losses, she gained her dragons. She truly loves her dragons as children, but they are also a liability to everyone but Dany. Interestingly, Dany’s human child with Khal Drogo was a liability to everyone but the Khalasar. The priestess from season 1 knew this, and so she prevented it. It doesn’t make the loss any less of a tragedy, however.

Will we see the same thing play out here in the final act of Game of Thrones? I’m not sure, but Khal Drogo’s presence will be heavily symbolic. Either Dany will meet him in the afterlife or reject death another time–but perhaps she’ll realize that her true desires were always for belonging and motherhood (just not at the expense of her own free will).

And, as an aside–I’ve really come to see Dany in a different light this season. I’ve always been anti-Daenerys as Ruler, but Daenerys as a character is truly fascinating. So what I see implied in her final arc is truly heartbreaking (and I hope it’s handled better overall than it was, in snapshot, here in 8x04). [Dany’s also my dad’s favorite character, haha, and I respect my dad’s opinion almost more than anyone else’s, so she gets props for that too lol].

3. Robin Arryn

I have a feeling this will be a cameo, but honestly the worst-case scenario for me would be Sansa being engaged to him lol. It would certainly be a Margaery Tyrell move on her part (knowing she won’t have to marry him for some time and he’ll be easy to influence), but the Knights of the Vale are already dedicated to her and I’m a Sanrion shipper so you know where I stand on any other Sansa ship. ;-)

Regardless, the Vale could become an important wrinkle in the plot, and I’m all for us not having a complete Doomsday scenario.

And In The Worst Case Scenario

The worst case scenario is that the leaks are legit. Bran as an emotionless king? The Starks are forever alone? Tyrion’s character assassination? Bleh.

But I’ve already hinted at my philosophy on canon storytelling.

Look, most fanon is crap–but so is most fiction. There are millions of stories out there, but it’s hard to find (and tell) one that resonates across all borders of sex, ethnicity, age, and epoch. You know what CAN exist in both fanon and canon–and what actually matters as canon in the end? The stories that are true.

If characters don’t act true to themselves, if deep-in-the-bones themes suddenly drop off, if crucial scenes that are present in every single successful outline are missing (don’t go postmodern on me–just read The Story Grid), then that story is incomplete. And it’s a lie.

Madeleine L’Engle once said “All truth is God’s truth.” She was trying to make the point that fantasy, and fiction in general, is important because it tells the truth. It’s not about the facts (dragons aren’t real! This is just a TV show! Etc.). It’s about the truth (dragons can be beaten! There is wonder in the world! We are united by our mythologies!).

So no, fanon can be a lot more than making heterosexual characters gay or inserting fluff without dealing with the consequences of character actions or erasing parts of canon. Fanon can be more true than canon when the author is on the tail of the actual Story.

Steven Pressfield does a much better job of explaining this in The War of Art. Madeleine L’Engle does a much better of explaining this in Walking on Water. Shawn Coyne does a much better job of explaining this in The Story Grid.

So don’t just take my word for it.

For me, then, I’m excited to see how the show plays out. And I’m fine if certain things that I only WANT don’t happen–but if the story doesn’t have what NEEDS to happen, then I’ll sadly and reluctantly reject it, and wait for GRRM’s books to come out, or simply contribute to the ASOIAF lore as best as I can. Hopefully not as wish fulfillment, but simply to respect the core of the story itself.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

11 notes · View notes

hanaxjeong · 6 years

Text

Birth of Velocity

(( OOC: so I'm gonna do a little preface to this whole self-para thing. Caus I don't know all the potential trigger warnings I should include, this is kind of the warning before the full thing.

Plus I wanted to tag people in CCPD and Team Flash so that those in the CCPD, if they want to do an investigation into Hana's place while she is missing they can get details in this.

Team Flash people will be tagged because of the end of the story. Also because this whole thing kind of effects them. I will probably also tag Main just so the admins can make sure not to miss the story.

Also Hana has been missing since December 3rd (since I said it was a week til Barry and Iris' wedding which was on the 9th) and I figured Hana might show back up either on the 19th or potentially later but still within December.

Also also for the Admins I decided to change the potential speedster name for Hana. Slipstream sounded weird and clunky the longer I thought about it. So title gives the new name!

CCPD: @detectivechristiansingh , @detectivexspivot , @struckbylightningflash

Team Flash: @viberamon , @speedsterxs , @lightningtotem , @elcngation

Main: @centralcitysfinest-rp

Hopefully that is everyone that needs to be tagged. If I missed someone let me know and I'll fix it! Enjoy!))

Hana sat at her desk and let out a soft sigh as she looked at the invitation before her. Barry Allen and Iris West Wedding. She was happy for the Forensics Scientist, but part of her felt awkward since she didn't really know her co-worker well enough to be invited to his wedding.

Running a hand though her hair she figured she would RSVP to the event, even easier to hand it over since the Forensics Lab was just a short walk away. Taking the invite to Barry's office she noticed he wasn't there.

"Must of gone home early." She said to herself as she placed the RSVP on his desk. Hana knew she would have to go get some fancy clothes, but she still had plenty of time, the wedding wasn't for another week or so.

Heading back downstairs to her desk she had noticed Joe missing as well. She had chalked it up to him helping Barry, or Iris get ready for the wedding. Taking a seat she looked at her case before her.

Missing people from the mall, and unlike those that had died, these were humans. They had no powers yet they still went missing. It was odd, but she had worked missing persons cases before.

Looking over the case a few more seconds she closed it. She wasn't going to get any answers looking at what little info they had. Storing the case in her desk she made her to the Captain's office to let him know she talked with him a bit before heading home.

Once she was home she, Hana ran a hand through her hair before heading to kitchen she opened the fridge and grabbed a beer. "Home sweet home." She muttered to herself as she popped the bottle cap off.

Taking a seat on her sofa she turned on the news, but quickly changed it from Channel 52. After she finished her drink she went to take a shower. Letting the warm water rush over her body Hana heard the sound of breaking glass.

Her mind started to race, but she calmly got out of the shower grabbing a towel. Hana left the water running. Walking over to her bed she reached behind the nightstand to pull out a hand gun.

Checking her house, she noticed a baseball sitting on her kitchen floor with broken glass. Letting out a sigh, she walked back to the bathroom to turn off the shower. After drying off and getting dressed she put the gun back where it belonged.

Grabbing the baseball, she headed to her neighbor's house. After talking with them for a while, she headed back to clean up the broken glass. Once it was cleaned up she headed to her bedroom.

On her wall was a copy of a case file from Coast City Police Department. The center of her web of the casefile was a picture of her father. Taking a look over the information on the wall, her lips pulled to the side. The information was getting jumbled with her current case. She needed sleep.

The next morning Hana looked over at her phone. The display read 5:45 AM. Early, but she was used to it. Getting up she got dressed to go jogging.

As she looked through her closet she noticed her surfing suit. "Why did I bring you to Central?" She questioned as she looked at it. Pushing it aside, she grabbed the jogging outfit.

This time she had hoped she wouldn't run into a criminal like she had a while back when she ran into Snart, or at least a version of Snart. Looking at the time she let out a sigh. 6:05 AM. She was running behind on her usual schedule.

Putting in her earbuds she turned on her running mix, which amounted to the sounds of the ocean. It helped calm her and helped her think things through. There was plenty on her mind she needed to think through.

Setting out on her route, Hana let her mind wander through everything going on. As she jogged her mind thought of everything that had been going on since she moved to Central City. The Revelation of Flashpoint, Metas, The Flash, the Attack on Central City Mall, Missing people. It was all so much.

Pre-Flashpoint. Her mind focused on that. A timeline that no longer exsisted. A time when her father lived and she was a meta. Not only a meta, but a superhero named Snapshot.

Her focus was ripped from the sounds of the ocean, of a timeline long since past, of a hero that didn't exist. Looking at who she bumped into, she looked at the man. He looked familiar, but she couldn't place it.

The man bothered her and she pulled out her cellphone to get ready to call the cops. She heard a scream and she looked over at the direction. It was just a few kids playing.

Lowering her phone she had forgotten about the man behind her. Taking a step forward her mind snapped back to the man she bumped into. Of course she couldn't get one jog without bumping into a criminal.

Turning around Hana found that she had more than Norvok to deal with. She didn't get to far before metal clasped around her mouth and her phone shattered by a metal fragment. Amunet Black. The only meta bold enough to kidnap someone in broad daylight.

Hana couldn't move, at least not without risk of getting killed. Her vision started to blur, the world felt out of synch. The last thing she could focus on was Amunet, at least until everything went dark.

When she finally woke up she was in a concrete room. At least she woke up in a bed, but she noticed her shoes were missing. "Well great." She commented. Looking around she didn't see much.

A single door, a light, the bed she woke up on, a toilet, a swirling symbol painted on the wall and no windows. She had seen solitary rooms in prisions that were homier than the room she was in. Getting up she walked around the room.

A camera in the corner. "Good. No privacy." She said as she saw the camera. Rubbing her temples she knew one simple truth that it had to be at least the same day. "Who the hell are you?" She asked looking at the camera.

Pacing back and forth for a bit she sat back down on the bed. Eventually a slat opened in the door and a tray of food slid in. Looking at it she was weary of it. "You really expect me to eat that after you drugged me already?" She asked.

"Why am I talking? No one is gonna respond." Hana said to herself. It wasn't long before her stomach growled. She cursed to herself about not having eaten before her run. She was weary of the food, but she needed to eat.

Cautiously making her way over to the food tray, Hana inspected it. Finger foods. Who ever gave her the food wasn't going to risk her storing away a utensil, even the tray was made of paper.

"Great. You might as well just get me Big Belly Burger if you're gonna be cheap." She said. Though she knew it was useless. Hana could hear muffled talking just outside her door, but she couldn't make out what was being said.

For now she had to survive. She needed to set up a routine to track time. She couldn't lose track of it otherwise she would lose sense of how long she had been missing.

After she had eaten she looked around, her eyes once again settled on the camera. It was too high up for her to mess with, and her bed was bolted to the ground. Letting out a sigh she sat back down on the bed.

It was easy for her to fall into a routine, each day she spent exercising. Each day she was served three meals, at night they dimmed the lights. Despite her best to keep track of how long she was missing, Hana was slowly losing track of time.

As she was doing situps, the door started to unlock. Standing up she watched as the door swing open. Right in front of her was a scientist with two guards behind her. "You've been keeping in shape." The woman said.

"It passes the time." Hana said as she took stock of the guards. "So you clearly kidnapped me for a reason." She added.

The scientist gave a soft chuckle. "Kidnapping is such a terrible word. We needed test subjects and you're the perfect specimen." The scientist said.

"You had Amunet Black kidnap me, locked me in this room and now you want to say that I'm what.. a test subject?" Hana asked. "You can go fuck yourself if you think I'm a willing test subject." She added.

"If I thought you were a willing subject then I wouldn't have these guards. We know that you have the potential to be very rebellious." The scientist said. "However it is your turn finally, so come along. I'd hate to have these two drag you out." She said turning to walk away.

Hana stayed where she was. "Ugh hit her with the Sonic blasters." The scientist said. The two guards raised their guns at her. Hana fell to the ground covering her ears.

"That's enough." The scientist said. The sound faded, but the ringing still filled her ears. The two guards walked over and dragged her away from her cell. The world was out of focus, she couldn't make out anything that was being said, or where she was being taken.

By the time her vision focused she was strapped to a table. Above her was a massive machine, a heart monitor beeped next to her. "Where ..." She barely managed to say. Hana had noticed that there was no one around.

The machine above her sprung to life. The orb end gathered electricity that danced around it. As she watched the electricity, Hana recognized it. It was the same as when the Flash ran.

"How did...." She tried to speak. Hana was cut off by the bolt of lighting that struck her. Her scream of pain was muffled by the lightning. As the bolt dissipated, the sound of the heart monitor grew louder.

Beeping. Beeping faster. Then a rush of scientist trying to stop her from dying, but Hana didn't feel like she was dying. Sure her whole body felt like it was on fire, but things seemed to of slowed down. Or had they?

"She is crashing! We need to stabilize her right now damn it!" One scientist shouted. Everything started to fade again. The heart monitor beeped faster and faster til a flat line was heard.

When Hana had woken up, she was in an alleyway, her body hurt like hell. How did she end up where she was. "Ugh ..." She groaned. Trying to stand up was a bad idea as she fell back to her knees.

"Hey you okay?" Someone asked her. Looking up she rubbed her forehead. "Uhm. Yeah. Just to much to drink last night." She lied.

The person had moved on with their day. Hana saw a nearby thrown away paper. She had been gone for some time, she had missed the wedding, she had missed worked. As she tried to read the paper she felt it shaking.

Looking at her hands she noticed it vibrating at a fast pace. "What the?" She asked curiously. She gripped her wrist trying to stop it. "No no no. Please stop." She said letting out an exhale trying to calm herself.

"Think Hana...." She said to herself. "Where can I go? Work wouldn't understand. The Flash. I need the Flash." She said aloud. Closing her eyes she tried to think of where he might be. S.T.A.R. Labs popped to mind. Taking a step forward, her body reacted on its own.

In an instant she was in the cortex of S.T.A.R. Labs. Though it was a less than graceful entrance. She had practically tripped as she tried to stop. Looking around she saw no signs of anyone being there. The only good thing was the Flash suit before her.

Standing up, she brushed off her damaged jogging outfit. She was surprised it hadn't been burned to a crisp when the lightning hit her. Looking down she noticed her shoes had been returned. "Where are you Flash?" She asked herself as she felt her hand vibrating again.

#ccfcentralcity #self-para #tw: kidnapping #tw: gun #tw: death

2 notes · View notes