Tumgik
#only moots can refer to him by she / her
sleptting · 2 years
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ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ୨୧ ㅤㅤSHUJI ㅤㅤTSUSHIMA
ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤthe
ㅤㅤ ㅤ ㅤㅤDEMONㅤㅤㅤㅤ PRODIGY
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sturniqlo · 1 month
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You're You- C.S
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summary: after finding out that they're both twenty year old virgins, both bff!chris and bff!y/n decide to take each others virginity.
cw: cursing, SMUT; unprotected p in v, pull out method, oral!f&m!receiving, making out
an: thank you to this anon and @monroesturnns for the idea
masterlist | join my taglist
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"Chris! Shh, I can't hear the movie." Y/n puts her hand over Chris' mouth who just can't stop talking. Chris' voice turns muffled and he licks her hand making her pulls her hand away. "You animal!" She gasps, wiping her hand against his shirt.
"You were asking for it, putting your hand over my mouth like that." He pinches her side lightly. "Well you don't ever shut the fuck up while a movie is clearly playing." Y/n points her hand to the movie. "Okay, okay. I'll shut my mouth for the rest of the movie." Chris holds his hands up in surrender. "Thank you, Chris. Now hand me the remote, I missed some parts."
"That's his first time? Doesn't seem like it." Chris says through a mouthful of M&M's, referring to the sex scene that is currently playing. Y/n only giggles, stealing a few pieces of chocolate from Chris' hand. "You never told me about your first time now that I think about it. We've been friends all these years and you never told me." Chris turns to look at her and she feels her face turn hot.
"W-what?" She stutters. "Your first time? How'd it go?" He shrugs as if this is something people talking about in a normal conversation. "I- I haven't- you know." She mutters but Chris couldn't quite hear her. "What was that?" Y/n covers her face. "I haven't had sex yet!" She says, peeking through her fingers to look at his reaction. Although it was totally okay to be a virgin, she still felt a bit embarrassed about it.
"Y/n-" He starts. "I know! I know! I'm almost twenty one and haven't been fucked yet, laugh all you want." She looks at him, dropping her hands in her lap. "Hey, 'm not gonna laugh. Since we're being honest here, I still haven't fucked anyone either or gotten my dick sucked." Y/n furrowed her eyebrows. "You're just saying that to make me feel better." She looks back at the movie, the two main characters were still going at it.
"I'm not, I'm being serious, I'm still a virgin." He grabs her chin so she can look at him. "Really? I mean how? You're- you're you!" She says finally meeting his eyes. "I could say the same thing about you." He leans in closer to her, their lips inches apart. "Are we really doing this?" She whispers. "Only if you want to." He brings her closer.
"Yes, I want this." She nods, moving her face closer to finally connect their lips. Their lips mold together perfectly. Chris holds the bottom of her jaw and nudges her face up so he can get better access. Y/n gasps and Chris takes the opportunity to stick his tongue in. She can taste the faintness of the M&M's they had both eaten a few minutes earlier. "Get on my lap." He pulls away gasping for air.
Y/n giggles, she can't believe this is happening right now. "Should I take this off?" She tugs on the hem of her shirt as she gets situated on his lap. "Please do. Wanna see you." He runs his hands up her thighs. Y/n places one last kiss on his jaw before removing her shirt, her bare breasts now exposed to Chris.
"Look at you." He moves his hands up her bare torso, placing a kiss on the valley of her tits. "Please, Chris." She whimpers. "Patience, baby." The pet name falls easily from his lips. Soon enough, Chris gives in and gives her what she wants. He kisses from her neck down to her right breast and sucks her nipples into his mouth, kneading the other with his hand.
"Oh!" She gasps at the sensation, feeling a wet patch form on her panties. "Does that feel good, hm?" He mutters against her nipple, looking up at her through his lashes. "So good." She nods, gripping his hair at the back of his head. Chris' moot comes off her nipple with a pop and gives the same treatment to her other.
Y/n pulls Chris' head away and reconnects their lips. Panting against their lips, Y/n pulls away and starts kissing down his jaw, bringing his shirt up. "Off, please." She mumbles, rolling her hips against his, making him groan. He soon gets his shirt off and flips them, now he's on top of her. He licks, sucks and nips against her neck and collarbones. Chris' kisses her lower and lower and he find himself pulling Y/ns' sweats down her legs chucking them to the floor.
"So wet already." Chris presses a finger on the wet patch and Y/n tries to close her legs. "Hey, it's okay." He coos, going back up to be face to face with her. "Are you sure you want this." He looks at her, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. "Yes, sorry. I just, you know. Never been touched there by anyone else." She leans up to give him a kiss. "Okay, if you want me to stop just tell me and we'll stop, alright?" He kisses her cheek before going back down to meet her covered cunt.
"Can I?." He puts her legs over her shoulder and kisses her inner thigh. "Yes." She nods. Chris moves her panties to the side and stares at her glistening pussy. "I've never done this before-" Y/n cuts his off. "It's okay, do what you think is natu- Oh!" She moans when she feels his tongue lick up from her hole to her clit. "Is that good?" He looks up at her while tonguing at her clit. "So good." She nods and sighs with pleasure.
Chris continues to suck on her pussy and slurp her juices. "You taste so sweet." He presses one last kiss to her puffy clit before coming up to kiss her, his chin wet with her arousal. Y/n can taste herself on his tongue. "Can I suck you off?" Y/n says through kisses, running her hand down to his hard on. "You want to?" He closes his eyes when he feels her squeeze his cock. "Yeah, same as you, I've never- you know." Chris chuckles. "I'm sure you'll be incredible."
Y/n now flips them over and Chris is sitting against the headboard, Y/n on his lap, kissing, nipping, and sucking on his neck. Like Chris, her kisses get lower and lower until she's on her knees face to face with his clothed dick. "Can I?" She asks. "Please do." Y/n lowers his sweats down and pulls him out, holding him in her hand. "So big." She kisses his pink leaky tip. "Oh fuck." He whispers. Y/n sucks on his top and leans in more until he's hitting the back of her throat.
"Shit!" He groans, gathering her hair into makeshift ponytail. She bobs her head up and down sucking his dick and she feels a string of her saliva go down her chin. "I'm- I'm close!" He tugs on her hair and brings her off his cock. "You don't want me to-" He shakes his head. "Wanna come with you." He smiles, bringing her to kiss him on the lips.
"Are you ready?" He refers to finally having sex. "I- yes." She nods, kissing him once more as he flips them and she's back against the mattress again. "I'm gonna go slow okay? Don't wanna hurt you." He kisses her forehead. As he grabs his cock to align himself to her hole, he remembers. "Fuck!" He groans, but not in pleasure. "What's wrong?" She says, coming up to lean on her elbows. "I- I don't have a condom. I can try to pull out- I will." He corrects himself. "Sounds perfect."
"Ready?" He slides his dick up and down, wetting his cock with her arousal. "Mhm." She nods. Chris stops his tip at her hole and slowly pushes in. "Oh." Y/n falls onto her back, feeling herself become full with Chris' cock. "You doing okay?" Y/n nods. "Yes, keep- keep going."
Once Chris is fully in her, he stops for a few seconds before pulling back and thrusting back in her. "Shit!" They both moan. Chris brings his thumb to her clit and draws 8's on the swollen nub. "Just like that- oh my god." She cries out, arching her back at the immense amount of pleasure. "You feel so good around me." He groans into her neck. "Fuck, Chris. Keep going." She whimpers.
"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I'm cumming." Y/n feels the imaginary rubber band snap in her lower belly. "I'm almost there, baby." He keeps thrusting in and out of her. "Shit- I'm almost. Fuck!" He pulls out and cums on her stomach, some landing on her tits. Y/n moans at the sight, feeling his warm spurts land on her body. "Holy fuck!" He lands on top of her, not caring at the fact that he's now got his cum all over himself. "How's that for a first time?"
"Better than I imagined it." She giggles, kissing his lips.
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heartkaji · 27 days
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[ 𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐂𝐔𝐏𝐈𝐃 ]
★ ── selfship event
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❤︎ WHAT’S CAPTAIN CUPID ?!
hihi hello ! welcome to my selfship event where I, MARS, assign scenarios & headcannons to your selfships !
❤︎ HOW DOES THIS WORK ?!
easy ! all you have to do is send me an ask describing you (or your oc’s) personality ! it’s similar to a matchup event except you’ll specify what character you’re being shipped with. my job as cupid will be to assign a dynamic & scenarios based on you & your fictional other’s personality !
you’ll select a maximum of three questions ( or four for moots ) you’d like me to answer about your selfship, and i’ll do my best to answer based on my idea of what your relationship would be like !
❤︎ WHO CAN I BE SHIPPED WITH ?!
your fictional other should be a character from wind breaker, haikyuu, mha or blue lock only.
note that all characters will be written as adults (18+) by default (everything is still sfw !)
only one f/o per person
❤︎ ANYTHING ELSE, CAPTAIN ?
here are some guidelines when requesting :
anyone is free to join ! you don’t have to be a follower or mutual to take part.
on that note, all scenarios & hcs will be sfw or at best lightly suggestive, so everyone of all ages is free to join
you can send your requests on or off anon. i recommend sending it off so you’ll be notified, but it’s all up to you ! edit : if requesting on anon, feel free to assign yourself a name or emoji !
don’t be shy ! i feel like a lot of self shippers are shy when talking about their self ships because they may feel cringy or embarrassed. trust me i’m not judgy at all. i love reading selfship posts so describe yourself or your oc in as much detail as possible !
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❤︎ PICK A QUESTION, ANY QUESTION !
note that before answering questions, i will provide a description of what dynamic i think your selfship would have !
if using an oc, please provide their name !
starred questions (*) have potential to receive slightly suggestive answers
remember you can only pick a maximum of three while moots pick four !
how did you first meet ?
who confessed & how ?
who fell first & who fell harder ?
first date ?
what do others (ex: parents/friends) think of your relationship ?
toxic things they do ?
toxic things you do ?
what do you often fight over ?
why/how did you break up ?
at what moment did they fall in love ?
at what moment did you fall in love ?
what do they not like about you ?
what do you not like about them ?
what do they love most about you ?
what do you love most about him ?
how was your first kiss like ?*
their favorite activity to do with you ?
their green flags in your relationship ?
how did they propose ?
what’s having a family with them like ?
❤︎ HOW TO REQUEST ?
to participate, you must first reblog this post then send me an ask following this template. starred (*) questions are optional. any requests that do not follow instructions will be deleted !
pronouns
*gender + any relevant information regarding gender identity (ex : perhaps you don’t wear certain clothing, or use she/her pronouns but prefer to be treated as male. this is to avoid me making you uncomfortable in descriptions
*sexuality (if unanswered, i will assume you are attracted only to the same gender as your f/o)
f/o + their fandom (refer to list of accepted fandoms)
what questions you want me to answer (3 or 4 max)
a description of you/your OC’s personality
*a description of you or your OC’s appearance (this is to make more specific & personal hcs, ex: them loving you/your OC’s freckles)
your perception of your f/o. everyone has different perspectives on different characters; so i’d like to see your f/o through your eyes in order to make more accurate hcs !
that’s all ! please remember i can only take a limited number of requests. i can’t guarantee requests will be answered on a first come first serve basis, but i recommend requesting as soon as possible ! when requests are closed, the prompt below will go from “start” to “end !”
TAGGING : @kaiser1ns @seneon @seumyo @caelivir @y2kuromi @17020 @megutime @bloodswrd
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[ 𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐂𝐔𝐏𝐈𝐃 ]
end.
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© ─ heartkaji ; do not steal, copy, edit, translate or reupload
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getvalentined · 6 months
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I've talked about the Nibelheim Doom Triangle many times, but I'm not sure I've ever actually put into words why I believe Lucrecia made the choice she did, at least not in a public forum. Given that Vincent has reentered the public consciousness with Rebirth, it's probably a good time.
We are not going to subscribe to the statement in the Ultimania that Lucrecia married Hojo out of pity because nobody in the company respected his work the same way nobody respected her thesis, because that's not only entirely out of character, but goes directly against what actually happened. Hojo was the lead assistant on Project S, like Gillian was on Project G; Gast selected him, his ideas, his theories, as being the best option after Project G failed. No one else was given this opportunity. After Sephiroth was born, Hojo was then moved (with Lucrecia and Hollander, but not Gillian, who had left the company) to work on Project 0—Shinra's single most important attempt at forcing humanity to progress as a species. Hojo was respected, and Lucrecia may be callow but she's never been the kind of woman who would marry someone out of pity. With that out of the way, we can get into my take on her decision.
I want to be explicitly clear: I don't believe it has anything to do with how attractive Vincent is versus Hojo, and I don't believe that it should. Asserting that Vincent's level of attractiveness should have been the key deciding factor in Lucrecia's decision does a disservice to her depth of character. Period. That isn't even addressing the fact that we're comparing a man who is eternally twenty-seven years old and was in peak physical condition at the time of his death to a man who is in his early sixties and has clearly not taken particularly good care of himself. We've never actually seen what Hojo looked like when he was young, since SE only ever uses one model for him in all modern iterations, so this is a moot point.
That said, Vincent's appearance was a mitigating factor in Lucrecia's decision—and it worked in Hojo's favor, not Vincent's.
We're almost twenty years out since the release of Dirge of Cerberus, so I feel like I can confidently state that Lucrecia was almost certainly in love with Grimoire Valentine. It was unspoken, unrequited, and doomed from the start, but the affection she had for that man was every bit as intense as the affection Vincent had for her—in fact, on the official relationship chart, Lucrecia's feelings for Grimoire are described using the same word as Vincent's feelings for Lucrecia. This is a repeating pattern, and that's part of the tragedy. Lucrecia adored Grimoire for his intellect, his drive, his passion; Vincent adored Lucrecia for the same reasons. Vincent refers to her as "the beautiful Lucrecia," yes, but he also describes her as the woman he respected most.
Knowing that Lucrecia loved Grimoire makes sense of how she was so torn between Vincent and Hojo.
Vincent looked like his father, he had his eyes, his nose, his brow. He probably had a fair number of his mannerisms, body language inherited and learned via his upbringing. They probably spoke almost the same way, their voices were similar, they had the same stories and the same sense of humor and the same idiosyncracies. But Vincent wasn't his father—he wasn't even a scientist, he didn't have that academic drive that drew Lucrecia to Grimoire in the first place. He was younger than Lucrecia by a few months, he couldn't be her guide or her teacher, and while he'd been assigned to be her protector, it wasn't the same. It could never be the same.
Hojo, meanwhile, looked nothing like Grimoire. His dark eyes and wide mouth and narrow shoulders were nothing like the man Lucrecia loved and lost through her own mistakes. But his drive, his passion, his determination—my god, it was just like him. Hojo's single-minded certainty, his confidence in his own comprehension, his intellectual unquenchable thirst to understand those things beyond his reach, it was all the same. His body language was different, his speech patterns were different, his research itself was different—but not, it turns out, too different, as Grimoire is indicated to be the first Shinra scientist to propose using foreign material on a child in utero in an attempt to produce something in-between man and god that could be communicated with on a human level. This theory, found amongst Grimoire's body of research after his death, may have actually inspired the direction of the Jenova Project (after working on adults in the Howling Fang failed to produce a functional result), and is directly responsible for the creation of Nero.
Vincent would never do that. Grimoire wrote it down, so we can assume that he would have, if he'd had the chance. Hojo did.
Lucrecia may have seen Grimoire in Vincent with her eyes, but she saw him in Hojo with her mind, and that's the part of him that she loved. That's the kind of man that she loved. That's the part of Hojo that she loved.
Before long, I can't imagine she was seeing him as an echo of Grimoire. Hojo was so different, but he was exactly what she wanted, exactly the kind of man—she thought—with whom she could spend the rest of her life. Working side by side as equals, two scientific minds ready to change the world together in ways that they never could alone.
Vincent, though? Vincent looks so much like his father, Lucrecia never stopped seeing his ghost. Every time she looked Vincent in the eye, she saw his father. Every time he spoke, every time he moved, every time he laughed or grimaced or sighed, she saw his father. Even at the very end, when she believed she'd failed to save him and left him in that tank for Hojo to find, she didn't see Vincent, she didn't see Chaos. She saw Grimoire.
"Did you know your eyes are just like your father's?"
Lucrecia chose Hojo because she had so much love left in her, and the echoes of Grimoire she saw physically in Vincent weren't enough for that love to find a home in him.
Lucrecia chose Hojo because he was alive, and she was tired of loving a ghost.
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markantonys · 2 months
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Was talking with a moot and they were saying how they don't feel like the show is doing a good job of explaining the lore. How right now we don't know what being the Dragon actually means, what ta'veren are, what the Dark One even is, what does he want, why does the Dragon fight him, how all of these mythologies are built into the worldbuilding in the books but aren't as clear in the show/feels disconnected. Idk I feel like the show is just introducing these things at a slower pace than the books did and that's not necessarily a bad thing
i just don't get these arguments because most of these lore points literally have been explained in the show???? do these book fans just miss it when lore is incorporated via natural dialogue or via Showing Not Telling instead of via somebody sitting us down to do an infodumping monologue for 5 minutes? i swear to god so many readers just don't pay attention to the show and then whine that it's missing stuff it did in fact include.
dragon stuff: this has been abundantly explained in both seasons, meanwhile in the books the concept of TDR wasn't even introduced until book 2. we will get more specifics at the same time rand does in upcoming seasons, just like in the books. at this early stage we don't need to know any more than "the dragon is a chosen one figure whose purpose is to fight the dark one and lead the last battle."
what the dark one is: a bad guy (duh) but otherwise left intentionally vague to build up mystery, just like the books did. we don't have the slightest conception of what TDO actually is until his first onscreen "appearance" in book SIX.
what does he want: to break the wheel and end existence. ishy's literal entire season 2 storyline was about this, and it went into way more detail than books 1-3 did. i'm not sure we got much of this stuff in the books until moridin came on the scene.
ta'veren is the only one i'd agree the show hasn't gone into much (though it DID explain the concept in 1x08), but, again, do we need to know that much about it right now? we know that our EF5 are Special, and that's enough if you ask me.
(i also wonder if the show might go a bit lighter on ta'veren than the books. idk, some of the stronger Main Character Energy stuff like plot armor and convenient coincidences and people blurting out secrets around them might come off a bit silly, and as for the stuff relating to the pattern controlling ta'veren's paths, it's interesting but it's pretty deep lore and the story doesn't really change whether or not we're explicitly aware that the events that happen to our gang are predestined. like, we'll obviously get plenty of predestination stuff with rand's dragon prophecies and min's viewings and likely the finn, so how necessary is it to also go into great detail on ta'veren predestination?)
having watched both seasons with my show-only non-fantasy-literate mom, i can attest that there is SO MUCH information for newcomers to wrap their heads around and i think her brain would have exploded if these seasons had tried to squeeze in any more than they did. she made me take down notes she could review between episodes! you should've seen her poor eyes glazing over at all the lore & worldbuilding stuff getting thrown at her in 2x05! this also goes for stuff like the whining about the show not yet using the words saidar & saidin - if they'd been throwing those around constantly since day 1, my mom would've had no fucking clue what they were talking about because she really struggles with remembering fantasy jargon, whereas consistently referring to it as "the male/female half of the source" in these early seasons is way more intuitive and way more effective at teaching her how this magic system works.
at the end of the day, the show simply is not ever going to flesh out the lore and mythology as deeply as the books do due to limitations of this different medium, and people need to accept that. it will explain as much lore as is necessary to understand the story and not much more than that, and that's absolutely fine. show-onlys are understanding the story just fine with the information the show is choosing to include, and lore nerds can knock themselves out rereading the books anytime they want.
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chaotic-on-main · 1 year
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Chapter 8 June - Part 5 [Final]
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☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world
☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.
☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, romance, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse, smoking and alcohol abuse mentions, domestic violence, light assault, eventual smut
☾ Author's note ➼ brb I'm sobbing. Mainly because look at my little characters and my story... I DID THAT. But also, because I actually finished something. Can y'all believe that?? Anyways. I hope you all like this chapter and I hope y'all enjoyed my story as a whole. I had a lot of fun thinking up this little world. I'm sure I have places where I can improve but considering this was my first fanfic in like, 10 years?? I'm taking it as win. Thank you to anyone who has spent their actual time to read my delusions, I appreciate y'all so much. I couldn't have finished without the support of my friends, moots, and you, my readers. Okay that's enough being mushy. I'm gonna go watch One Piece now. See y'all around hehe :3
☾ Word Count ➼ ~8.5k
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The first thing you’re greeted with the moment you stir awake is the smell of clean laundry laced with traces of pine. The sound of seagulls squawking away in the distance comes muffled through Levi’s bedroom windows and you can feel the gentle morning sun that filters through caressing your skin. You keep your eyes closed, reveling in the moment of peace you find yourself in.
As each of your senses wake up with you, you can’t help but smile softly into the raven hair tickling your face from underneath. Levi is fully tangled with you and the sheets, legs sprawled all over the bed. His strong arms wrap around your waist and hold you close as he breathes deeply into your chest, the warmth of his body begging you to fall back asleep. You lift your hand and delicately rake your fingers through his soft hair, but he doesn’t rouse. He’s dead to the world in your arms.
The memories of the night before pop into your mind slowly like bubbles rising in the ocean – none of them unpleasant. Levi made sure to clean you up before dressing you in one of his shirts and pulling you into the bed with him for the night. Not much was said during this but as always, there never was any need for words between the two of you. His intentions all night were clear.
The phantom pressure of Levi’s lips on yours sends warmth up into your cheeks. You were not expecting an outcome like this, yet you were not disappointed in the slightest. Flashbacks to the things he did to you fly through your mind and you can’t help as your legs shift under the sheets at the thoughts.
“Mm?” You hear from your sleepy companion.
You allow your eyes to flutter open, having to squint initially at the pale light pouring in through the glass – the sun just broke through the horizon. You can tell it will be another beautiful day out just from the sight of the fluffy white clouds that drift lazily in the orange sky.
You attempt to pull away to sign something but it’s of no use as Levi only tightens his arms around you and pushes his face more into your plush chest. Your face was already warm enough, but this ensured it would not go away any time soon. A small, amused huff escapes your lips, nevertheless.
“No.” Levi mumbles against you. His voice is thick with sleep.
You nuzzle into his hair with a smile as you’re not sure what else to do at the moment. You needed to get up before Hange or Erwin did, but you weren’t ready to say goodbye to this haven you both created – and neither was Levi.
“Don’t leave… want you to stay.”
You like this sleepy and clingy Levi, another version of him that you feel must be reserved just for you. You place small kisses on the top of his head in response, holding him closer into your chest as you do. There’s a heavy sigh from him, a telling one that sounds content. His warm hands slide under your shirt and up your back as he continues to hold on to you for dear life. Your blinks start to slow and suddenly you’re drifting off again.
You’re not certain how long you were out, but the next time your eyes open, the light trickling through the windows is brighter. Your arms still wrap around Levi, this time around his chest as you rested on your side and he on his back. An arm circles your waist, holding you close, with his hand sitting gently on your hip. You don’t know how you both moved so drastically, but you still appreciate it because now you can see Levi’s sleepy face.
His porcelain skin contrasts greatly with his tousled hair, miles away from his usual style and yet one of your favorites on him by far. Dark, long lashes sit on his soft cheeks and his pale-pink lips form into a small pout. He’s so at peace when he sleeps, leaving you wondering what he might be dreaming about. You hope it’s full of nothing but good things.
Slowly, you pull your hand up and trail your fingers down the side of Levi’s face, feeling the slight roughness of his stubble poking into your skin as they pass. His eyes don’t open but you can tell with the shift in his breathing, he’s waking up again.
You hook a finger around his chin and tug it down gently so that you can see his sleepy face better. Dark gray eyes open in slow blinks, staring into yours. Pulling his chin down more, you press your lips onto his, your movements slow and lazy and with little urgency. It sends tingles down your spine and into your toes – something you believe you won’t ever get used to.
When you pull away, Levi’s quick to place his hand on the side of your face to hold you still so that he can steal one more kiss. His fingers then tuck away rogue strands of your hair behind your ear before running his thumb across your bottom lip which is now pulled into a smile.
“How do you get more beautiful every time I see you?” He whispers down to you, voice husky from sleep.
You respond back with an eye roll and a shrug, but his words echo in your mind. You stare as his soft skin glows in the warm, morning sun. He’s one to talk, you think. Levi trills his lips as he exhales heavily, pulling you more into him with his arm.  
You take this opportunity to place your free arm around his stomach and rest your head against his warm chest, the steady rhythm of his heart reverberating through your skull. Leaning down, he places a gentle kiss on the top of your head. His lips linger against your scalp as he talks, coming muffled through your hair. It tickles.
“I suspect the idiots will be up soon if they aren’t already.”
As if on cue, you hear the faint clinking of metal out in the kitchen. Someone was up and working on getting breakfast ready. A sinking feeling comes with the realization that you would have to face your sister and Erwin about last night. You pull away slowly, sitting up so that both hands are free to sign then turning towards Levi. He shoots you a subtle pout at the absence of your body, and you don’t stop the soft laugh that escapes you.
‘What do we tell them?’
“We don’t have to tell them anything.” He sits up on his elbows and furrows his brows, a steely resolve deep seated in his gaze.
‘They’re going to ask questions.’
“You don’t have to answer anything.” He reiterates. “We can just go out there and ignore them.”
‘You know Hange, that won’t-‘ Levi reaches over with one hand and closes it over your moving fingers, making you stop. His hand then trails up your forearm before wrapping his fingers around it and pulling you down – making you collapse onto his bare chest. He then wraps his arms around you and holds you in a vice grip, despite your silent giggles and squirming.
“I’ll handle it. But let’s get you some pants, first.”
.
The moment you step out of the bedroom, the smell of cooked bacon hits you full force. Hange and Erwin are in the middle of talking as they stand by the stove, turning to look at your already flustered face at the sound of the door opening. You take a few steps out of Levi’s room and sheepishly wave at them. Erwin raises an eyebrow but Hange, on the other hand, drops the spatula they were loosely gripping. It falls into the pan of cooking meat, splattering oil everywhere.
“Whaaaaaat??!” Hange runs over to you with bugged eyes, leaving Erwin to clean up the oil splatter before it starts a fire. Their hands reach up and cup your cheeks, squishing your face in the process as they squeal more.
“I was wondering where you’ve been! Canoodling with Levi was not my first thought, I admit.” Your face begins to heat up more in embarrassment. You knew this was inevitable, but you were still not prepared in the slightest. Levi brushes past you and Hange towards the kitchen but Hange shoots a hand out and grabs him by the arm, their other hand still against your face.
“Oh no you don’t, we’re talking about this!”
“Let go of me, four-eyes.” Levi demands.  
“Hange, they just got up. Give them a moment.” You hear Erwin muse from behind your sister. You flash him a look of gratitude as Hange drops both hands and sets you and Levi free with a huff.
Erwin had outdone himself with the feast he prepared for everyone. Crispy bacon, fluffy eggs, and bouncy pancakes. But despite the delicious food, the palpable awkward silence and dense tension that followed was stronger. You ignore the burning stare aimed directly at the top of your head as you dug into your plate, knowing full well it was from Hange. The only noises that filled the space were the clattering of utensils and soft chewing of food.
It doesn’t go unnoticed how Levi chose to sit next to you this time, something he hadn’t done prior to this morning. You dare to look up for a second in his direction, catching his eye as he sips his morning tea. There’s a small smirk pulling up the corners of his mouth as he looks away and back to his breakfast.
“I can’t believe the festival is tonight. This trip has gone by so quickly, don’t you think?” Erwin pipes up after wiping his mouth carefully with a napkin.
“Did you both make up?” Hange blurts out.
“Hange, come on.” Erwin gives them an exasperated glare.
“I deserve to know. She was so upset yesterday and now she’s not and I need to make sure they’re okay!”
When you look back up to your sister, you can tell right away they are bursting at the seams. Eyes wide, face almost purple, and their fingers clenching their fork so tightly the knuckles turn white. Not much has been eaten off their plate, which shakes gently from their knee bouncing under the table. With a heavy sigh, you lean back in your chair and glance over to Levi. There’s a brief pause as he considers it, but then he nods ever so slightly.
“What do you want to know?” He grumbles, arms folded over his chest as he also leans back.
“Are you both on good terms now? Did you sleep together? How was it? Were you safe? You know, I have a whole bag of condoms in my bag if you need more!” Hange’s eyes bulge out of their face with every question, and you feel your face heat up more than it already was. You sink down in your seat further and hide your face behind both hands. Of course, Hange would go straight to those questions.
“Yes. Pass. None of your business. I do not need to know that and why do you even have that many?”
“Just in case! You never know.” Hange picks up their fork and shoves a bite of pancakes in their mouth before talking again, voice muffled. “You can’t answer the questions like that, Levi! Be serious.”
“I have nothing else to give you. It’s none of your business.” Levi shrugs as he goes for another sip of his tea.
“Fine, I’ll ask my sister. She can’t say no to me.” You feel something hit your shin under the table and you jump up with a squeak. Peeking through your fingers, you see them staring hard at you.
“Spill.”
Hange was right. You were bad at hiding things from your sister. Eventually you always relent. Like the time at the spa, or the day after the ball so many months ago. But this time, you find yourself not wanting to share. It was your memory to keep, and you didn’t want anyone else to know. Your fingers clenched into fists as you think about what you want to say, Hange’s stare burning holes in your face the whole time.
“Oi, would you leave my girlfriend alone and let her finish her breakfast first?” Levi sighs as he pokes his fork into the last of his eggs. Hange chokes on their water.
Your head whips in his direction at his words, but he’s staring out towards the ocean with his mouth moving slowly as he chews. Girlfriend. You and Levi didn’t discuss what last night meant for the relationship. After everything, you were sure there was more to you and him than just friends. But to say that term so brazenly… it gives you goosebumps.
“Gir-?!” Hange starts out but is then cut off by Erwin, thankfully.
“The weather looks like it will be nice all day, so we need to make sure we dress appropriately. Look at all of these activities. According to this article, the fireworks display is the best show on this side of the coast.”
Your eyes shift over to his blue gaze, which peeks above his phone that he was scrolling on. You mouth a thank you and he winks back before going back to the webpage he was reading off. You feel Levi’s hand reach over from under the table and squeeze your thigh gently, his attention still on the ocean.
Girlfriend.
You liked that.
.
After that morning, you had all gotten dressed and ready to celebrate what the town had been preparing for all week – the summer festival. It was like if you had taken the energy from the past few days and then combined them all into one night and multiplied that by ten. The streets were crowded all day and straight into the evening, only getting more intense as the night went on. Sometimes Hange and Erwin would break off from you two and you don’t know if it was intentional or not, but you were grateful for it regardless.
With everything so new, you weren’t sure how Levi felt about PDA outside of leading each other where to go, but as always, he answered that for you. He wasn’t shy about taking your hand and lacing his fingers in with yours. Nor did he hesitate to grab your waist and pull you into him while walking or waiting in line for something. It felt as if he wasn’t letting anything get in the way of what he wanted anymore.
As sunset approaches, you and Levi meet up with the rest of the group at the beach where people were preparing paper lanterns. According to Erwin, Liberio’s lantern release is one of the main attractions for their summer festival, right next to the fireworks show which took place about an hour after. You’ve never taken part in anything like this before, so you were very excited.
When you and Levi step up to the table that your sister and Erwin were standing around, you notice that they’re writing something on the sides of their lantern in black marker. You can’t make out what it says, so you tap your hyper focused sister on the shoulder to get their attention. They turn to you with bright eyes and an even brighter smile.
“There you are, my little strawberry! You better hurry up and get your lantern, it’s almost time.” They jerk their head backward towards the shoreline and you look over to see people standing with their lanterns lit as they chat away in wait.
‘What are you writing?’
“The locals say to write your wishes and dreams for the future. They say that once you release them, they fly into the sky and the gods above pluck them up and grant them when the time is right. Isn’t that fascinating?? And get this! I had to ask around but they’re biodegradable! A lot of people were a little offended that I asked, and I think it has to do with them really believing they got plucked out of the skies! How silly of them, but who am I to tell them otherwise.” Hange looks like they’re having one of the best days of their life and you just smile back. They reach over to ruffle your hair before going back to the paragraph they were writing on their lantern.
Looking over to Erwin, you notice he had written a singular line, but of course you can’t make it out. He stands tall, lantern in hands, as he stares out to the setting sun. His blue eyes trail over to you before smiling at you softly, the sea breeze blowing through his fine hair.
“This place is quite lovely, don’t you agree?” He asks.
Nodding back, you hum in agreement. Despite the intense moments, you can’t help but feel grateful for this trip and everything that accumulated to get you to where you are now. If it meant going through the anxieties of the unknowns to get here, you would do it all over again.
Levi says your name and when you turn in his direction, you notice he’s holding out a blank lantern. Golden hour is in full swing as it casts soft shadows on him, highlighting the sharp angles on face. There's a glint of something in his eyes as he watches you, though the rest of his expression gives nonchalance.
‘Thank you.’ You sign before taking the lantern and marker from his hands, your fingers lightly brushing against his as you do.
“Hm.” He picks up his own lantern from the table and scrawls something on it as he uses his hand to block you from seeing it. You force yourself not to pry though it killed you to not know what was on his mind. You figure he might tell you what he asked for later down the road. As for yours though, you write what you hoped wouldn’t be a one-time thing.
More days like this one, forever and ever. With the ones I love so dearly.
When you look up in satisfaction at your wish, you notice your friends staring back at you with what you can only assume is love in their own way. A sense of warmth lights through your veins like the sunshine on your face and you find yourself smiling so brightly that it scrunches your eyes and hurts your cheeks.
As Levi steps away from the table, he holds his hand out to you – his own version of a smile tugging on his lips as he waits for you. Fingers clasping over his as you secure your wishes in the other hand, you’re led down to the shoreline with everyone else.
You never saw it even as he released it above him, but if you did you would have seen that Levi’s lantern had one simple sentence. Something so full of conviction and confidence, written in neat letters so that if there were gods, they would be able to see it so easily and hopefully grant it without hesitation.
To spend the rest of my life with her.
That night, you didn’t fully intend to return to Levi’s room but as you passed by it on the way to your own, his arm had shot out and latched around your wrist to hold you there. He didn’t offer much in terms of words, but it was there in his metallic eyes. Unspoken.
Stay.
So, you did. And that night after, when you were all spent from your last day at the beach and Liberio as a whole, Levi didn’t even have to ask, nor did you have to look at him to know. You followed him like you always would as long as he wanted you to, right to his bed and straight into his arms.
.
Before you know it, you’re on the long flight back home with soft music flowing through your earbuds. You watch as the early morning clouds float by from down below, casting various shadows on the dark blue water of the ocean underneath. Your head sinks into the stuffed strawberry that sits sandwiched between you and the wall of the plane. Your hands, however, find themselves preoccupied in Levi’s fingers. Levi is half-asleep with his head resting against your shoulder, his warm breath tickling the skin that is exposed from your tank top.
You always assumed he didn’t sleep much, so to see him pass out so easily as he held onto you was a welcome surprise. In the past few days, Levi’s energy had shifted. It was different and you couldn’t explain how, but it was there albeit subtle. Those prominent dark circles under his eyes were still there, but they didn’t cut into his skin like they used to. And his ever-present scowl rarely made an appearance, at least from what you saw.
Erwin and Hange saw it too. They didn’t say anything, but you could tell Hange was just begging to say something to Levi.
“When are you two getting married?” Your sister had joked to you while you were both waiting in the security line at the airport.
At that time, you rolled your eyes at it. It’s not like it wasn’t on your mind, since they were the ones that brought it up in the first place. But now, it felt so real. There was an actual chance for it.
To be honest, you never gave much thought to settling down with someone. The language barrier proved difficult for the very few suitors you’ve had in your life, and they were always gone before you knew what happened. So, the prospect of marriage wasn’t something you thought to worry about.
Then Levi came back into your life.
Levi cared for you in ways that no one else did. Levi was patient and put in the work for you instead of adapting to what was. You never had to ask with him – he just knew. And as always, he made everything easy.
Without looking over, you gently squeeze his hand a few times. A few seconds pass and you think he might be in a deeper sleep than you thought, but eventually his fingers reciprocate with the same pressure and your smile reflects back at you from the window.
Even though Levi had promised he wouldn’t leave, you still hope that whatever life had in store for you that he would indeed be a part of it for as long as you lived.
.
About a week had gone by since the small plane touched back down into Jinae’s local airport. Hange hit the ground running, staying at the lab late at night to catch up on what they missed. Erwin and Levi were quick to get the café back up and it was surprisingly busy – a lot of regulars equally worried and interested to hear about where they’d been for the last week. And whenever Levi wasn’t at work, he was with you.
 While making dinner together at your apartment one night, Levi threw out the suggestion of going to see his mom with him sometime over the weekend. You hadn’t seen her since before you both had left for Liberio, so you were eager to accept the offer. Whether it was your quick response to going or the genuine smile that graced your soft lips as you were signing away about how excited you were to see her again, Levi found himself pulling you away from the lettuce you were chopping and into his arms before kissing you so deeply that you saw stars.  
You never knew, but Levi’s brain clicked, and a decision was made right then and there.
When Saturday comes around, Levi swings by the apartment to pick you up that afternoon. You had offered to drive but he was quick to decline and that was that. You won’t complain though, you liked watching him from the passenger seat. The way his bottom lip would jut out in focus, how his eyes would flicker between each mirror every once in a while. His hand resting against your thigh and squeezing it gently.
After pulling into a space at the front of Riverside, Levi puts the car in park and glances over to you. In both hands, you hold a large bouquet of flowers that you had picked out specifically for Kuchel. Giving them a big sniff, you gaze over to Levi with a smile.
“She’s going to love them.” He says as he reaches over to touch your face softly. You don’t hesitate to lean into his warmth. “Ready?”
You nod before unbuckling yourself and sliding out of the passenger seat. Levi does the same and makes his way to your side, his fingers finding your hand as he locks the car with a few clicks of the key fob. His thumb rubs against the side of your palm while he leads you through the wide doors and into the facility.
According to the staff, it was a really good day for Kuchel. A fleeting thought of what a bad day might look like flashes through your mind, but you’re quick to shake it aside. Levi guides you down a couple of different cozy hallways that lead to the side of the building that held the patient’s living suites.
Like the hallways that led to the outside courtyard, the ones you walk down are just the same. Various acrylic paintings pass by in colorful blurs as your hands fidget with the plastic that holds the bouquet together. Even before Levi had warned you that his mom might have trouble remembering you, anxiety gnawed at you. The need to be liked by someone so important to Levi was ever present. He glances over to you at the crinkling of plastic and squeezes your hand a few times in reassurance.
Eventually, Levi stops in front of a white door with a hanging sign decorated with various colorful flowers and a cursive letter A in the middle. He knocks gently and through the heavy wood, you hear a muffled ‘Come in!’
When he opens the door, your mouth opens slightly in surprise.
Kuchel’s room looked as if it was taken out of a Victorian cottage catalog. For a moment, you forget that you’re in a medical facility as you take a few steps into the room – Levi closing the door behind the two of you once past the door frame.
First, you notice the soft bed on the right side of the room, fitted with tan sheets adorned with floral patterns. There are a few decorative pillows propped up against the backboard. Along the walls are sketches of people that are too small to make out, but from what you can see they are drawn beautifully well. The window in the far back is wide open, letting in the afternoon summer breeze that makes the sage green curtains dance on each side. A dresser sits under the sill that houses a couple bottles of what you think might be perfume and a few glass trinkets.
Then your eyes drift over a pale woman in the corner of the room.
Kuchel is sitting in a plush lounge chair with her feet up on an ottoman, a charcoal pencil between fingers and she’s sketching away on a pad. Her dark eyes snap up from her paper as you walk in, greeting you both with a big smile. Carefully, she places her things on the table next to her and pushes herself up from the chair, the leather squeaking at the shift in weight.  
“My little Levi.” She sighs happily.
“You don’t need to get up.” Levi scolds as he walks over to help her. She’s frailer than you remember her being, but her eyes and smile remain the same – bright and full of life. She wraps her arms around Levi and holds him close as she mumbles how it’s been a while since he last came to visit. He pulls away and gives her a smile, but there’s sadness in his eyes. You know that she was the first stop for him when he got home about a week ago.
“I’ve heard you’ve been drawing again.” He says, craning his neck to the sketch she was working on. An eyebrow raises at it and then his gaze flickers over to you.
“Mom, I don’t know if you remember…” He holds his hand out for you to take as he calls your name.
Kuchel turns her attention to you now, and at first, you’re wondering if you would need to reintroduce yourself but there’s a small flash of recognition in the same eyes she shared with Levi. She studies your face as well as your hand that holds onto her son’s. After a moment of thinking, your name finally comes tumbling out of her mouth in a question as she makes her way over to you. She wraps her arms around you in a tight hug, squishing the bouquet you had brought in the process.  
“Oh wow, look how much you’ve grown. I haven’t seen you since you were just a little thing.” She says softly. You hug her back carefully, aware of how much smaller her frame is to yours. Her hugs are so good you want to cry again, but you hold them back and instead relish in her warm embrace before pulling away with your own beaming smile. Levi reaches over to take the flowers from you, a handful of petals falling to the vinyl flooring as he does and sets it on Kuchel’s nightstand.
‘It’s nice to see you again.’ You sign, Levi interpreting for you as you go.
“Oh, are you deaf honey?” She watches you with intrigue. You shake your head no.
“She’s mute, but she can hear you just fine.” Levi pipes up softly. He looks to you as if to apologize but you smile back in reassurance. There was nothing to apologize for.
“Oh dear me. What happened?” She places a soft hand over yours before leading you to one of the chairs next to the one she got out of just moments before. Her eyebrows furrow at you in concern, the same way Levi’s does – it makes you laugh.
“I don’t think we should take up this whole visit with such a long story.” Levi suggests, shooting you a nervous glance again. You wouldn’t mind explaining the situation at some point but truthfully, you didn’t have the energy to dive into it right now. Especially when there’s only so much time to be with Kuchel and you would rather shift the attention something more pleasant. Levi picks up on this.
“What have you been working on lately?” He points to the piece of paper that Kuchel was currently sketching on, and she starts talking animatedly about her newest project.
The visit with Kuchel goes well into the early evening. The time was spent talking about Levi when he was younger, which surprised you a lot, but you remembered him mentioning how people with dementia can have a harder time recalling recent memories compared to older ones. Levi, of course, was not thrilled to be the topic of conversation but he didn’t fight it.
From her anecdotes, you learned that the moment they moved to Jinae, Levi had done everything he could to help supplement their income so that his mom didn’t have to work as much as she used to. That meant doing odd jobs here and there – working late into the night sometimes and at such a young age. It makes you sad to think of such a young Levi losing parts of his childhood to survive. But you get the sense that Levi would do it all over again if it meant being where they are today. Despite the struggles, they did what they could - together.
You were having such a wonderful time getting to know more of Levi’s past as well as Kuchel’s life that you barely register him squeezing your hand to get your attention.
“We need to get going soon. It’s almost time for mom’s dinner and we have one more stop to make.” Levi says gently, pursing his lips. He wasn’t ready to leave either. Squeezing back, you nod to Levi and stand up slowly from your chair. You offer Kuchel a small smile and lean down to hug her again so that she doesn’t have to get up.
“Go ahead, I’ll be right behind you. There’s something I need to talk to my mom about.” Levi says, nudging his head to the door behind him. Nodding in understanding, you then reach up to touch his face gently before turning on your heel and starting for the door.
“Wait, dear. Take this with you.” Kuchel calls out to you. She goes over to the wall closest to her and pulls down a sketch. She considers it for a moment then stretches it out for you to take.
When you grab it from her fingers, your eyes widen at the different sketches that filled out the paper. There are a few drawings of flowers growing out of empty space, some with little bees or butterflies hovering from above. There’s one of what you assume is a teenage Levi as he straddles a motorcycle, a scowl shooting straight through you. Finally, there’s a smaller sketch of three kids sitting on a porch step as they eat ice pops together. Levi, you, and your brother.
How wonderful of an artist Kuchel is, you think. The lines are crisp and so full of detail, you can easily feel yourself transported back to when these memories were made. You don’t remember much about your brother, but you feel like that day was a good one. A feeling of warmth travels through your body as a blast of blind nostalgia hits you. You told yourself you weren’t going to cry but you already feel the heat in your eyes as they threatened to make an appearance.
Instead of saying anything, you throw your arms around Kuchel, almost knocking her over in the process. She laughs softly as she holds onto you as tight as she can, her hand rubbing circles on your back affectionately.
“I’m so glad you found us again.” She whispers as she pulls away from you. Her eyes sparkle as she looks up at you, smiling so much so that her eyes crinkle in the corners. “Don’t be a stranger.”
With that, you squeeze her in one more hug. Pulling away, you mouth an ‘okay’ with a toothy grin before turning on your heels and out the door, closing it with a click behind you.
“Something on your mind, Levi?” Kuchel turns her focus on her son who hasn’t moved an inch from his seat. Levi props his elbows on his knees and folds his fingers together to rest his chin on it.
“Mom, what do you think about her?”
“Well, I’m not the best person to ask about that.” She chuckles as she leans back into her soft recliner.
“I know, but-“ Levi’s leg starts to shake with anxiety.
“I think she’s lovely. She’s grown into quite the woman, reminds me a lot of her mom. From what I can remember, you know.” Kuchel teases. “Why do you ask?”
Levi’s fingers unlink from each other, and he starts to fidget with the fabric of his jeans as he looks away shyly.
“Mom. I’m going to marry her.” Levi whispers quietly.
“Oh honey, I know.”
“You know?” Levi glances back up to his mom incredulously.
“Yes. I’ve known since you were both kids. I’m pretty sure she even exclaimed at one point that she was going to marry you when she was old enough, to which you scoffed. It was very adorable.”
“Mom, I don’t know whether to be embarrassed or surprised that you remember something like that. It’s just something kids say.”
“The way you look at each other now is the same way you did before. Stars in your eyes, like nothing else mattered.” Sitting up, she reaches over and places her palm over Levi’s busy fingers. “Do me a favor. Go to my nightstand and grab that blue box inside the drawer.”
As always, Levi does what he’s told and makes his way to the wooden nightstand by her bed. He expects something decently sized but instead, he is met with a small pale blue box. A ring box. He picks it up carefully and turns it around to his mom with it pinched between two fingers, leaning back so that the drawer closes behind him.
“What’s this, Ma?” Levi asks as he brings it over to his mom’s awaiting hand.
Kuchel pops it open and turns it to Levi. It’s something he’s seen once, many years ago; A bridal set, one that was passed down from her mom. In the middle of a gold band sits a dainty oval ruby surrounded in “vines” that are beset by smaller diamonds in the shape of leaves. An engagement ring and wedding band – fitting together perfectly. Kuchel had shown Levi the set when he was really young, but she never wore them – which he suspects was to keep it safe from his father’s clutches. The gemstones sparkle brightly off the sunset that floods through her window.
“Mom…”
“Now listen here. I won’t be around forever – don’t look at me like that. I want you to have this now. I’m not saying to get married right away or even propose, but it would make me feel better if I knew you had this for when the time comes. And I trust you way more than I do Kenny.” With a snap, she closes the lid and shoves it in Levi’s direction.
He takes it reluctantly, not really sure what else to say. The thought dawns on him that his mom might not be around for his wedding day whether it be mentally or physically, and an ache shoots through his chest. But just like him, his mom’s decision was made. And there was no going back.
“Okay, mom.” He says back finally, closing his fingers around it tightly before standing up to slide it in his jean pockets.
“Don’t disappear on her again.” Kuchel stands up as well and places both of her cold, delicate hands on each side of Levi’s face as she stares hard at her son. “Promise me.”
Cupping his own hands over hers, he nods back as he says, “I promise.”
“Ms. Ackerman? It’s time for dinner.” A voice rings out from a staff member that stands in the open doorway of her room. It seems they have come to collect Kuchel to take her to the dining hall. 
“Yes, one moment.” Kuchel wraps her arms around Levi once more and holds him close for a moment before letting go. “I’ll see you soon?”
“Of course Ma, I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He says quietly then leans over to kiss her warm cheek.
“Can you get her a vase for those flowers, please?” Levi asks as he steps towards the staff member currently blocking his path.
“I’ll see to it, Mr. Ackerman.” They bow slightly and move aside.
As he brushes past, he sees you leaning against the wall as you scroll through your phone with his mother’s drawing pinched between tight fingers in the other hand. The golden rays from the sunset reflect off the white building and through the windows, sheathing you in a shower of sunlight like a spotlight. You are blissfully unaware of how breathtaking you are to him.
“Are you ready to go?” Levi asks, startling you from the video you were silently laughing at. You lock your phone and slide it into your back pocket before stretching a hand out to him to take. Your smile never fades as he laces his fingers through yours without hesitation and leads you out of Riverside Assisted Living, mumbling about where he would like to go for the evening.
.
That night, Levi surprises you with a picnic date.
By the time Levi pulls into his apartment, the sun is all but gone – leaving indigo and navy blues behind it. He told you that he wouldn’t be long and to stay in the running car. A few minutes go by until you see him again, bounding down the steps with a large blanket roll in one arm and a picnic basket in the other. As the overhead lights pop on while he opens the back door to unload what was in his arms, he shoots you a small smile. Then he holds something small out to you.
“Will you hold this for me?”
You hold your palm out for him, and he places a small box in the middle of it. It’s black with mesh wire on each side and a few little buttons on the top. It’s a bluetooth speaker, you surmise. When Levi hops back into the driver’s side, you raise an eyebrow at him.
 “I figured you wouldn’t want to eat dinner in silence.” He says as he reverses out of the parking spot then heads for the main road.
It doesn’t take very long to get to Jinae’s downtown – just minutes away from their café. But instead of turning down the street that would lead to it, he keeps driving until he gets to the park that once held the Sakura Festival so many months ago. The trees are all but green now, not even a small trace of pink hanging from the branches.
After parking in a small lot provided for park goers, Levi takes your hand and leads you down the subtle hill towards the bank of the river. It’s a lovely evening where the air is just warm enough with a light breeze. Fireflies start to flicker in and out of the whole park, illuminating whatever happened to be near it in a warm, yellow glow. And the only noises you hear are distant crickets and frogs coming from the river – which flows so gently that it doesn’t even look like it’s moving. The city lights reflect off the water like its glass.
There aren’t that many people out tonight as well, which is surprising given the time of year. But what surprises you even more is the one single tree lit up with a string of lights that encircle the trunk and up into the branches above. There’s nothing else next to it but you know it was meant for you.
This was the same tree you and Levi sat under while you waited for your friends at the festival back in April. Where the urge to kiss him was burning through your whole body. Where you felt your feelings for him concrete themselves into your mind.
Levi hands you the basket before letting go of your hand to roll the blanket out under the tree. In mere moments, his shoes are removed and placed neatly in the grass. He beckons you to join him as he stands in the middle of the blanket, the soft glow of the tree lighting up his face.
Kicking off your own shoes, you then step over to Levi with the basket dangling in your fingers. As he reaches over to take it back from you, he takes a step forward to plant a gentle kiss on your lips – one that lingers even when he pulls away.
“Is this okay?” he asks. At first, you think he’s referring to the kiss, but you realize his eyes are bouncing around you. There’s a subtle hint of anxiety in his gaze that wouldn’t be detectable by most people.
‘This is perfect.’ You reassure.
Despite how small the basket looked from the outside, you find out quickly that it held more than you thought. Once you and Levi settle down, he starts to unpack a myriad of items, mostly all food related. A plate with what looks like chicken salad sandwiches comes out first, all cut into small triangles. Then comes a small bowl of chopped up melon, a bag of chips, and a tall bottle of amber liquid – apple juice, Levi assured you. Finally comes out a small pillow that you recognize from Erwin’s couch. You can’t help but laugh as you sit up straight to get a better look at everything.
“What?” Levi asks with a frown.
‘It’s nothing. When did you prepare all of this?’ You inquire before picking up the chips to inspect what kind they were.
“Earlier this morning.”
You look up to see Levi eyeing you warily. Behind that façade of nonchalance, you see a very anxious man waiting for what you thought about all of this. You never took Levi to be the type to care about what other people thought, which means he really cared about what you had to say.
‘This is fantastic. Thank you for putting in all the effort.’ You lean over to give him a chaste kiss on the cheek. With a light blush, he hums back in response as he looks away to fiddle with something on his phone – at a glance, it looks like a music app. That reminds you about the speaker you had shoved into your bag before leaving the car, so you reach in and pluck it out. Levi takes it from your hand and a moment later, soft rock plays through each side of the box. Despite the small build, it sure is mighty in sound.
“There. Hungry?”
‘Starving.’
As Levi watches you nibble on your last piece of melon, he can’t help but think how perfect you are to him. Vulnerability wasn’t something that came easy to him but when you walked into his café and back into his life, it was like a scab that had been reopened. As uncomfortable as it was, he found the rawness that came with it very refreshing. What would it mean to stay by your side forever, he wonders. To wake up next to you for the rest of his life.
These thoughts raced through his mind earlier as he packed the basket and you waited in the car. The ring box burnt a hole in his pocket as he stood by his desk contemplating his choices. Tonight would be a perfect time to propose to you but still, something held him back. This was new to not only him, but you as well. Were you ready for something so life-altering? Was this even something you wanted? These were not topics that are generally brought up in casual conversation after only a week of officially dating.
No, he would know when it was time. For now, he was content with what he had, and he would wait for as long as you needed him to.
“Are you happy?” Levi leans back on a hand as he looks over to you.
You glance over to him in surprise at the question. Just as quickly, it dissolves into a big smile that lights up your eyes. Popping the rest of the fruit in your mouth, you sit up so you can sign easily.
‘I am. Are you?’
“I guess. It’s nice here.” He smirks at you, remembering that this is what he said to that same question months ago. “With you.” But he never got to say that to you then.
“You told me a while ago that words were not always needed to convey intent.”
‘I did, yes.’ Your face scrunches in confusion at the sudden statement.
Levi sits up before reaching into the basket with his left hand. For a moment you think he’s about to bring out dessert of some kind but instead he takes out a small paper bag, no bigger than three inches in width. He turns it upside down above his palm and out comes a gold chain necklace. A small cherry blossom pendant dangles off the side of his hand, glinting in the lights next to you. You scramble up on all fours as you inch closer to get a good look at it, knowing full well what it was.
“At first, this was bought as an apology. But now, I think this was also my way of saying that I love you, without me realizing it.” Levi mutters softly. Your wide eyes flicker from the pendant over to Levi’s face, lips parted in amazement. The necklace looks as if it was never broken, much less worn with the fresh polish it had received.
Before leaving Liberio, Levi had snuck away to a jeweler in town to see what they could do to fix it. In terms of damage, fortunately it was minimal. ‘For something so delicate, it sure is hardy.’ the jeweler had told Levi as they inspected it. He knew the jeweler was talking about the chain, but his mind drifted to you instead.
‘You fixed it for me.’
“It was important to you. I couldn’t leave it behind.” Levi gets up on his knees and scoots so that he’s behind you. Gingerly, he loops the chain around your neck and a few seconds later, it’s locked tight. You pinch the small metal pendant in between two fingers as you sigh in relief at the familiar weight hanging on your neck once again.
‘Thank you, Levi.’
You turn to face Levi and throw your arms around his neck as you lean in to kiss him. He startles at the abrupt movement but is quick to reciprocate as he places both hands on your waist and pulls you closer into him. He can feel you smiling into the kiss as it deepens.
As you both break apart, breathing heavily from the lack of air, you don’t lose your smile. Your hands raise to cup Levi’s face, your thumbs stroking his cheeks as you stare into those slate gray eyes of his that you loved so much.
“I don’t really have much else planned for tonight, so I can take you home-” You’re quick to cut him off with a shake of your head, much to Levi’s relief. He wasn’t ready to let you go either.
“Okay.” Levi muses. “We can stay here until you’re ready.”
The night carries on as you both lie on your backs, Levi holding you close in one arm. At some point, he started humming along to some of the songs that flowed through the speakers. The fireflies had gone to bed soon after. With your head resting on Levi’s chest, the gentle beating of his heart threatens to lull you into sleep.
As sure as the twinkling stars drift above, Levi Ackerman loves you.
And oh, how you love Levi Ackerman back.
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☾ Previous Chapter: June Part 4
☾ Next Chapter: TBA
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spicerackofblorbos · 8 months
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Chapter 8: June - Part Five [Final]
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☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world
☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.
☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, romance, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse, smoking and alcohol abuse mentions, domestic violence, light assault, eventual smut
☾ Author's note ➼ brb I'm sobbing. Mainly because look at my little characters and my story... I DID THAT. But also, because I actually finished something. Can y'all believe that?? Anyways. I hope you all like this chapter and I hope y'all enjoyed my story as a whole. I had a lot of fun thinking up this little world. I'm sure I have places where I can improve but considering this was my first fanfic in like, 10 years?? I'm taking it as win. Thank you to anyone who has spent their actual time to read my delusions, I appreciate y'all so much. I couldn't have finished without the support of my friends, moots, and you, my readers. Okay that's enough being mushy. I'm gonna go watch One Piece now. See y'all around hehe :3
☾ Word Count ➼ ~8.5k
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The first thing you’re greeted with the moment you stir awake is the smell of clean laundry laced with traces of pine. The sound of seagulls squawking away in the distance comes muffled through Levi’s bedroom windows and you can feel the gentle morning sun that filters through caressing your skin. You keep your eyes closed, reveling in the moment of peace you find yourself in.
As each of your senses wake up with you, you can’t help but smile softly into the raven hair tickling your face from underneath. Levi is fully tangled with you and the sheets, legs sprawled all over the bed. His strong arms wrap around your waist and hold you close as he breathes deeply into your chest, the warmth of his body begging you to fall back asleep. You lift your hand and delicately rake your fingers through his soft hair, but he doesn’t rouse. He’s dead to the world in your arms.
The memories of the night before pop into your mind slowly like bubbles rising in the ocean – none of them unpleasant. Levi made sure to clean you up before dressing you in one of his shirts and pulling you into the bed with him for the night. Not much was said during this but as always, there never was any need for words between the two of you. His intentions all night were clear.
The phantom pressure of Levi’s lips on yours sends warmth up into your cheeks. You were not expecting an outcome like this, yet you were not disappointed in the slightest. Flashbacks to the things he did to you fly through your mind and you can’t help as your legs shift under the sheets at the thoughts.
“Mm?” You hear from your sleepy companion.
You allow your eyes to flutter open, having to squint initially at the pale light pouring in through the glass – the sun just broke through the horizon. You can tell it will be another beautiful day out just from the sight of the fluffy white clouds that drift lazily in the orange sky.
You attempt to pull away to sign something but it’s of no use as Levi only tightens his arms around you and pushes his face more into your plush chest. Your face was already warm enough, but this ensured it would not go away any time soon. A small, amused huff escapes your lips, nevertheless.
“No.” Levi mumbles against you. His voice is thick with sleep.
You nuzzle into his hair with a smile as you’re not sure what else to do at the moment. You needed to get up before Hange or Erwin did, but you weren’t ready to say goodbye to this haven you both created – and neither was Levi.
“Don’t leave… want you to stay.”
You like this sleepy and clingy Levi, another version of him that you feel must be reserved just for you. You place small kisses on the top of his head in response, holding him closer into your chest as you do. There’s a heavy sigh from him, a telling one that sounds content. His warm hands slide under your shirt and up your back as he continues to hold on to you for dear life. Your blinks start to slow and suddenly you’re drifting off again.
You’re not certain how long you were out, but the next time your eyes open, the light trickling through the windows is brighter. Your arms still wrap around Levi, this time around his chest as you rested on your side and he on his back. An arm circles your waist, holding you close, with his hand sitting gently on your hip. You don’t know how you both moved so drastically, but you still appreciate it because now you can see Levi’s sleepy face.
His porcelain skin contrasts greatly with his tousled hair, miles away from his usual style and yet one of your favorites on him by far. Dark, long lashes sit on his soft cheeks and his pale-pink lips form into a small pout. He’s so at peace when he sleeps, leaving you wondering what he might be dreaming about. You hope it’s full of nothing but good things.
Slowly, you pull your hand up and trail your fingers down the side of Levi’s face, feeling the slight roughness of his stubble poking into your skin as they pass. His eyes don’t open but you can tell with the shift in his breathing, he’s waking up again.
You hook a finger around his chin and tug it down gently so that you can see his sleepy face better. Dark gray eyes open in slow blinks, staring into yours. Pulling his chin down more, you press your lips onto his, your movements slow and lazy and with little urgency. It sends tingles down your spine and into your toes – something you believe you won’t ever get used to.
When you pull away, Levi’s quick to place his hand on the side of your face to hold you still so that he can steal one more kiss. His fingers then tuck away rogue strands of your hair behind your ear before running his thumb across your bottom lip which is now pulled into a smile.
“How do you get more beautiful every time I see you?” He whispers down to you, voice husky from sleep.
You respond back with an eye roll and a shrug, but his words echo in your mind. You stare as his soft skin glows in the warm, morning sun. He’s one to talk, you think. Levi trills his lips as he exhales heavily, pulling you more into him with his arm.  
You take this opportunity to place your free arm around his stomach and rest your head against his warm chest, the steady rhythm of his heart reverberating through your skull. Leaning down, he places a gentle kiss on the top of your head. His lips linger against your scalp as he talks, coming muffled through your hair. It tickles.
“I suspect the idiots will be up soon if they aren’t already.”
As if on cue, you hear the faint clinking of metal out in the kitchen. Someone was up and working on getting breakfast ready. A sinking feeling comes with the realization that you would have to face your sister and Erwin about last night. You pull away slowly, sitting up so that both hands are free to sign then turning towards Levi. He shoots you a subtle pout at the absence of your body, and you don’t stop the soft laugh that escapes you.
‘What do we tell them?’
“We don’t have to tell them anything.” He sits up on his elbows and furrows his brows, a steely resolve deep seated in his gaze.
‘They’re going to ask questions.’
“You don’t have to answer anything.” He reiterates. “We can just go out there and ignore them.”
‘You know Hange, that won’t-‘ Levi reaches over with one hand and closes it over your moving fingers, making you stop. His hand then trails up your forearm before wrapping his fingers around it and pulling you down – making you collapse onto his bare chest. He then wraps his arms around you and holds you in a vice grip, despite your silent giggles and squirming.
“I’ll handle it. But let’s get you some pants, first.”
.
The moment you step out of the bedroom, the smell of cooked bacon hits you full force. Hange and Erwin are in the middle of talking as they stand by the stove, turning to look at your already flustered face at the sound of the door opening. You take a few steps out of Levi’s room and sheepishly wave at them. Erwin raises an eyebrow but Hange, on the other hand, drops the spatula they were loosely gripping. It falls into the pan of cooking meat, splattering oil everywhere.
“Whaaaaaat??!” Hange runs over to you with bugged eyes, leaving Erwin to clean up the oil splatter before it starts a fire. Their hands reach up and cup your cheeks, squishing your face in the process as they squeal more.
“I was wondering where you’ve been! Canoodling with Levi was not my first thought, I admit.” Your face begins to heat up more in embarrassment. You knew this was inevitable, but you were still not prepared in the slightest. Levi brushes past you and Hange towards the kitchen but Hange shoots a hand out and grabs him by the arm, their other hand still against your face.
“Oh no you don’t, we’re talking about this!”
“Let go of me, four-eyes.” Levi demands.  
“Hange, they just got up. Give them a moment.” You hear Erwin muse from behind your sister. You flash him a look of gratitude as Hange drops both hands and sets you and Levi free with a huff.
Erwin had outdone himself with the feast he prepared for everyone. Crispy bacon, fluffy eggs, and bouncy pancakes. But despite the delicious food, the palpable awkward silence and dense tension that followed was stronger. You ignore the burning stare aimed directly at the top of your head as you dug into your plate, knowing full well it was from Hange. The only noises that filled the space were the clattering of utensils and soft chewing of food.
It doesn’t go unnoticed how Levi chose to sit next to you this time, something he hadn’t done prior to this morning. You dare to look up for a second in his direction, catching his eye as he sips his morning tea. There’s a small smirk pulling up the corners of his mouth as he looks away and back to his breakfast.
“I can’t believe the festival is tonight. This trip has gone by so quickly, don’t you think?” Erwin pipes up after wiping his mouth carefully with a napkin.
“Did you both make up?” Hange blurts out.
“Hange, come on.” Erwin gives them an exasperated glare.
“I deserve to know. She was so upset yesterday and now she’s not and I need to make sure they’re okay!”
When you look back up to your sister, you can tell right away they are bursting at the seams. Eyes wide, face almost purple, and their fingers clenching their fork so tightly the knuckles turn white. Not much has been eaten off their plate, which shakes gently from their knee bouncing under the table. With a heavy sigh, you lean back in your chair and glance over to Levi. There’s a brief pause as he considers it, but then he nods ever so slightly.
“What do you want to know?” He grumbles, arms folded over his chest as he also leans back.
“Are you both on good terms now? Did you sleep together? How was it? Were you safe? You know, I have a whole bag of condoms in my bag if you need more!” Hange’s eyes bulge out of their face with every question, and you feel your face heat up more than it already was. You sink down in your seat further and hide your face behind both hands. Of course, Hange would go straight to those questions.
“Yes. Pass. None of your business. I do not need to know that and why do you even have that many?”
“Just in case! You never know.” Hange picks up their fork and shoves a bite of pancakes in their mouth before talking again, voice muffled. “You can’t answer the questions like that, Levi! Be serious.”
“I have nothing else to give you. It’s none of your business.” Levi shrugs as he goes for another sip of his tea.
“Fine, I’ll ask my sister. She can’t say no to me.” You feel something hit your shin under the table and you jump up with a squeak. Peeking through your fingers, you see them staring hard at you.
“Spill.”
Hange was right. You were bad at hiding things from your sister. Eventually you always relent. Like the time at the spa, or the day after the ball so many months ago. But this time, you find yourself not wanting to share. It was your memory to keep, and you didn’t want anyone else to know. Your fingers clenched into fists as you think about what you want to say, Hange’s stare burning holes in your face the whole time.
“Oi, would you leave my girlfriend alone and let her finish her breakfast first?” Levi sighs as he pokes his fork into the last of his eggs. Hange chokes on their water.
Your head whips in his direction at his words, but he’s staring out towards the ocean with his mouth moving slowly as he chews. Girlfriend. You and Levi didn’t discuss what last night meant for the relationship. After everything, you were sure there was more to you and him than just friends. But to say that term so brazenly… it gives you goosebumps.
“Gir-?!” Hange starts out but is then cut off by Erwin, thankfully.
“The weather looks like it will be nice all day, so we need to make sure we dress appropriately. Look at all of these activities. According to this article, the fireworks display is the best show on this side of the coast.”
Your eyes shift over to his blue gaze, which peeks above his phone that he was scrolling on. You mouth a thank you and he winks back before going back to the webpage he was reading off. You feel Levi’s hand reach over from under the table and squeeze your thigh gently, his attention still on the ocean.
Girlfriend.
You liked that.
.
After that morning, you had all gotten dressed and ready to celebrate what the town had been preparing for all week – the summer festival. It was like if you had taken the energy from the past few days and then combined them all into one night and multiplied that by ten. The streets were crowded all day and straight into the evening, only getting more intense as the night went on. Sometimes Hange and Erwin would break off from you two and you don’t know if it was intentional or not, but you were grateful for it regardless.
With everything so new, you weren’t sure how Levi felt about PDA outside of leading each other where to go, but as always, he answered that for you. He wasn’t shy about taking your hand and lacing his fingers in with yours. Nor did he hesitate to grab your waist and pull you into him while walking or waiting in line for something. It felt as if he wasn’t letting anything get in the way of what he wanted anymore.
As sunset approaches, you and Levi meet up with the rest of the group at the beach where people were preparing paper lanterns. According to Erwin, Liberio’s lantern release is one of the main attractions for their summer festival, right next to the fireworks show which took place about an hour after. You’ve never taken part in anything like this before, so you were very excited.
When you and Levi step up to the table that your sister and Erwin were standing around, you notice that they’re writing something on the sides of their lantern in black marker. You can’t make out what it says, so you tap your hyper focused sister on the shoulder to get their attention. They turn to you with bright eyes and an even brighter smile.
“There you are, my little strawberry! You better hurry up and get your lantern, it’s almost time.” They jerk their head backward towards the shoreline and you look over to see people standing with their lanterns lit as they chat away in wait.
‘What are you writing?’
“The locals say to write your wishes and dreams for the future. They say that once you release them, they fly into the sky and the gods above pluck them up and grant them when the time is right. Isn’t that fascinating?? And get this! I had to ask around but they’re biodegradable! A lot of people were a little offended that I asked, and I think it has to do with them really believing they got plucked out of the skies! How silly of them, but who am I to tell them otherwise.” Hange looks like they’re having one of the best days of their life and you just smile back. They reach over to ruffle your hair before going back to the paragraph they were writing on their lantern.
Looking over to Erwin, you notice he had written a singular line, but of course you can’t make it out. He stands tall, lantern in hands, as he stares out to the setting sun. His blue eyes trail over to you before smiling at you softly, the sea breeze blowing through his fine hair.
“This place is quite lovely, don’t you agree?” He asks.
Nodding back, you hum in agreement. Despite the intense moments, you can’t help but feel grateful for this trip and everything that accumulated to get you to where you are now. If it meant going through the anxieties of the unknowns to get here, you would do it all over again.
Levi says your name and when you turn in his direction, you notice he’s holding out a blank lantern. Golden hour is in full swing as it casts soft shadows on him, highlighting the sharp angles on face. There's a glint of something in his eyes as he watches you, though the rest of his expression gives nonchalance.
‘Thank you.’ You sign before taking the lantern and marker from his hands, your fingers lightly brushing against his as you do.
“Hm.” He picks up his own lantern from the table and scrawls something on it as he uses his hand to block you from seeing it. You force yourself not to pry though it killed you to not know what was on his mind. You figure he might tell you what he asked for later down the road. As for yours though, you write what you hoped wouldn’t be a one-time thing.
More days like this one, forever and ever. With the ones I love so dearly.
When you look up in satisfaction at your wish, you notice your friends staring back at you with what you can only assume is love in their own way. A sense of warmth lights through your veins like the sunshine on your face and you find yourself smiling so brightly that it scrunches your eyes and hurts your cheeks.
As Levi steps away from the table, he holds his hand out to you – his own version of a smile tugging on his lips as he waits for you. Fingers clasping over his as you secure your wishes in the other hand, you’re led down to the shoreline with everyone else.
You never saw it even as he released it above him, but if you did you would have seen that Levi’s lantern had one simple sentence. Something so full of conviction and confidence, written in neat letters so that if there were gods, they would be able to see it so easily and hopefully grant it without hesitation.
To spend the rest of my life with her.
That night, you didn’t fully intend to return to Levi’s room but as you passed by it on the way to your own, his arm had shot out and latched around your wrist to hold you there. He didn’t offer much in terms of words, but it was there in his metallic eyes. Unspoken.
Stay.
So, you did. And that night after, when you were all spent from your last day at the beach and Liberio as a whole, Levi didn’t even have to ask, nor did you have to look at him to know. You followed him like you always would as long as he wanted you to, right to his bed and straight into his arms.
.
Before you know it, you’re on the long flight back home with soft music flowing through your earbuds. You watch as the early morning clouds float by from down below, casting various shadows on the dark blue water of the ocean underneath. Your head sinks into the stuffed strawberry that sits sandwiched between you and the wall of the plane. Your hands, however, find themselves preoccupied in Levi’s fingers. Levi is half-asleep with his head resting against your shoulder, his warm breath tickling the skin that is exposed from your tank top.
You always assumed he didn’t sleep much, so to see him pass out so easily as he held onto you was a welcome surprise. In the past few days, Levi’s energy had shifted. It was different and you couldn’t explain how, but it was there albeit subtle. Those prominent dark circles under his eyes were still there, but they didn’t cut into his skin like they used to. And his ever-present scowl rarely made an appearance, at least from what you saw.
Erwin and Hange saw it too. They didn’t say anything, but you could tell Hange was just begging to say something to Levi.
“When are you two getting married?” Your sister had joked to you while you were both waiting in the security line at the airport.
At that time, you rolled your eyes at it. It’s not like it wasn’t on your mind, since they were the ones that brought it up in the first place. But now, it felt so real. There was an actual chance for it.
To be honest, you never gave much thought to settling down with someone. The language barrier proved difficult for the very few suitors you’ve had in your life, and they were always gone before you knew what happened. So, the prospect of marriage wasn’t something you thought to worry about.
Then Levi came back into your life.
Levi cared for you in ways that no one else did. Levi was patient and put in the work for you instead of adapting to what was. You never had to ask with him – he just knew. And as always, he made everything easy.
Without looking over, you gently squeeze his hand a few times. A few seconds pass and you think he might be in a deeper sleep than you thought, but eventually his fingers reciprocate with the same pressure and your smile reflects back at you from the window.
Even though Levi had promised he wouldn’t leave, you still hope that whatever life had in store for you that he would indeed be a part of it for as long as you lived.
.
About a week had gone by since the small plane touched back down into Jinae’s local airport. Hange hit the ground running, staying at the lab late at night to catch up on what they missed. Erwin and Levi were quick to get the café back up and it was surprisingly busy – a lot of regulars equally worried and interested to hear about where they’d been for the last week. And whenever Levi wasn’t at work, he was with you.
 While making dinner together at your apartment one night, Levi threw out the suggestion of going to see his mom with him sometime over the weekend. You hadn’t seen her since before you both had left for Liberio, so you were eager to accept the offer. Whether it was your quick response to going or the genuine smile that graced your soft lips as you were signing away about how excited you were to see her again, Levi found himself pulling you away from the lettuce you were chopping and into his arms before kissing you so deeply that you saw stars.  
You never knew, but Levi’s brain clicked, and a decision was made right then and there.
When Saturday comes around, Levi swings by the apartment to pick you up that afternoon. You had offered to drive but he was quick to decline and that was that. You won’t complain though, you liked watching him from the passenger seat. The way his bottom lip would jut out in focus, how his eyes would flicker between each mirror every once in a while. His hand resting against your thigh and squeezing it gently.
After pulling into a space at the front of Riverside, Levi puts the car in park and glances over to you. In both hands, you hold a large bouquet of flowers that you had picked out specifically for Kuchel. Giving them a big sniff, you gaze over to Levi with a smile.
“She’s going to love them.” He says as he reaches over to touch your face softly. You don’t hesitate to lean into his warmth. “Ready?”
You nod before unbuckling yourself and sliding out of the passenger seat. Levi does the same and makes his way to your side, his fingers finding your hand as he locks the car with a few clicks of the key fob. His thumb rubs against the side of your palm while he leads you through the wide doors and into the facility.
According to the staff, it was a really good day for Kuchel. A fleeting thought of what a bad day might look like flashes through your mind, but you’re quick to shake it aside. Levi guides you down a couple of different cozy hallways that lead to the side of the building that held the patient’s living suites.
Like the hallways that led to the outside courtyard, the ones you walk down are just the same. Various acrylic paintings pass by in colorful blurs as your hands fidget with the plastic that holds the bouquet together. Even before Levi had warned you that his mom might have trouble remembering you, anxiety gnawed at you. The need to be liked by someone so important to Levi was ever present. He glances over to you at the crinkling of plastic and squeezes your hand a few times in reassurance.
Eventually, Levi stops in front of a white door with a hanging sign decorated with various colorful flowers and a cursive letter A in the middle. He knocks gently and through the heavy wood, you hear a muffled ‘Come in!’
When he opens the door, your mouth opens slightly in surprise.
Kuchel’s room looked as if it was taken out of a Victorian cottage catalog. For a moment, you forget that you’re in a medical facility as you take a few steps into the room – Levi closing the door behind the two of you once past the door frame.
First, you notice the soft bed on the right side of the room, fitted with tan sheets adorned with floral patterns. There are a few decorative pillows propped up against the backboard. Along the walls are sketches of people that are too small to make out, but from what you can see they are drawn beautifully well. The window in the far back is wide open, letting in the afternoon summer breeze that makes the sage green curtains dance on each side. A dresser sits under the sill that houses a couple bottles of what you think might be perfume and a few glass trinkets.
Then your eyes drift over a pale woman in the corner of the room.
Kuchel is sitting in a plush lounge chair with her feet up on an ottoman, a charcoal pencil between fingers and she’s sketching away on a pad. Her dark eyes snap up from her paper as you walk in, greeting you both with a big smile. Carefully, she places her things on the table next to her and pushes herself up from the chair, the leather squeaking at the shift in weight.  
“My little Levi.” She sighs happily.
“You don’t need to get up.” Levi scolds as he walks over to help her. She’s frailer than you remember her being, but her eyes and smile remain the same – bright and full of life. She wraps her arms around Levi and holds him close as she mumbles how it’s been a while since he last came to visit. He pulls away and gives her a smile, but there’s sadness in his eyes. You know that she was the first stop for him when he got home about a week ago.
“I’ve heard you’ve been drawing again.” He says, craning his neck to the sketch she was working on. An eyebrow raises at it and then his gaze flickers over to you.
“Mom, I don’t know if you remember…” He holds his hand out for you to take as he calls your name.
Kuchel turns her attention to you now, and at first, you’re wondering if you would need to reintroduce yourself but there’s a small flash of recognition in the same eyes she shared with Levi. She studies your face as well as your hand that holds onto her son’s. After a moment of thinking, your name finally comes tumbling out of her mouth in a question as she makes her way over to you. She wraps her arms around you in a tight hug, squishing the bouquet you had brought in the process.  
“Oh wow, look how much you’ve grown. I haven’t seen you since you were just a little thing.” She says softly. You hug her back carefully, aware of how much smaller her frame is to yours. Her hugs are so good you want to cry again, but you hold them back and instead relish in her warm embrace before pulling away with your own beaming smile. Levi reaches over to take the flowers from you, a handful of petals falling to the vinyl flooring as he does and sets it on Kuchel’s nightstand.
‘It’s nice to see you again.’ You sign, Levi interpreting for you as you go.
“Oh, are you deaf honey?” She watches you with intrigue. You shake your head no.
“She’s mute, but she can hear you just fine.” Levi pipes up softly. He looks to you as if to apologize but you smile back in reassurance. There was nothing to apologize for.
“Oh dear me. What happened?” She places a soft hand over yours before leading you to one of the chairs next to the one she got out of just moments before. Her eyebrows furrow at you in concern, the same way Levi’s does – it makes you laugh.
“I don’t think we should take up this whole visit with such a long story.” Levi suggests, shooting you a nervous glance again. You wouldn’t mind explaining the situation at some point but truthfully, you didn’t have the energy to dive into it right now. Especially when there’s only so much time to be with Kuchel and you would rather shift the attention something more pleasant. Levi picks up on this.
“What have you been working on lately?” He points to the piece of paper that Kuchel was currently sketching on, and she starts talking animatedly about her newest project.
The visit with Kuchel goes well into the early evening. The time was spent talking about Levi when he was younger, which surprised you a lot, but you remembered him mentioning how people with dementia can have a harder time recalling recent memories compared to older ones. Levi, of course, was not thrilled to be the topic of conversation but he didn’t fight it.
From her anecdotes, you learned that the moment they moved to Jinae, Levi had done everything he could to help supplement their income so that his mom didn’t have to work as much as she used to. That meant doing odd jobs here and there – working late into the night sometimes and at such a young age. It makes you sad to think of such a young Levi losing parts of his childhood to survive. But you get the sense that Levi would do it all over again if it meant being where they are today. Despite the struggles, they did what they could - together.
You were having such a wonderful time getting to know more of Levi’s past as well as Kuchel’s life that you barely register him squeezing your hand to get your attention.
“We need to get going soon. It’s almost time for mom’s dinner and we have one more stop to make.” Levi says gently, pursing his lips. He wasn’t ready to leave either. Squeezing back, you nod to Levi and stand up slowly from your chair. You offer Kuchel a small smile and lean down to hug her again so that she doesn’t have to get up.
“Go ahead, I’ll be right behind you. There’s something I need to talk to my mom about.” Levi says, nudging his head to the door behind him. Nodding in understanding, you then reach up to touch his face gently before turning on your heel and starting for the door.
“Wait, dear. Take this with you.” Kuchel calls out to you. She goes over to the wall closest to her and pulls down a sketch. She considers it for a moment then stretches it out for you to take.
When you grab it from her fingers, your eyes widen at the different sketches that filled out the paper. There are a few drawings of flowers growing out of empty space, some with little bees or butterflies hovering from above. There’s one of what you assume is a teenage Levi as he straddles a motorcycle, a scowl shooting straight through you. Finally, there’s a smaller sketch of three kids sitting on a porch step as they eat ice pops together. Levi, you, and your brother.
How wonderful of an artist Kuchel is, you think. The lines are crisp and so full of detail, you can easily feel yourself transported back to when these memories were made. You don’t remember much about your brother, but you feel like that day was a good one. A feeling of warmth travels through your body as a blast of blind nostalgia hits you. You told yourself you weren’t going to cry but you already feel the heat in your eyes as they threatened to make an appearance.
Instead of saying anything, you throw your arms around Kuchel, almost knocking her over in the process. She laughs softly as she holds onto you as tight as she can, her hand rubbing circles on your back affectionately.
“I’m so glad you found us again.” She whispers as she pulls away from you. Her eyes sparkle as she looks up at you, smiling so much so that her eyes crinkle in the corners. “Don’t be a stranger.”
With that, you squeeze her in one more hug. Pulling away, you mouth an ‘okay’ with a toothy grin before turning on your heels and out the door, closing it with a click behind you.
“Something on your mind, Levi?” Kuchel turns her focus on her son who hasn’t moved an inch from his seat. Levi props his elbows on his knees and folds his fingers together to rest his chin on it.
“Mom, what do you think about her?”
“Well, I’m not the best person to ask about that.” She chuckles as she leans back into her soft recliner.
“I know, but-“ Levi’s leg starts to shake with anxiety.
“I think she’s lovely. She’s grown into quite the woman, reminds me a lot of her mom. From what I can remember, you know.” Kuchel teases. “Why do you ask?”
Levi’s fingers unlink from each other, and he starts to fidget with the fabric of his jeans as he looks away shyly.
“Mom. I’m going to marry her.” Levi whispers quietly.
“Oh honey, I know.”
“You know?” Levi glances back up to his mom incredulously.
“Yes. I’ve known since you were both kids. I’m pretty sure she even exclaimed at one point that she was going to marry you when she was old enough, to which you scoffed. It was very adorable.”
“Mom, I don’t know whether to be embarrassed or surprised that you remember something like that. It’s just something kids say.”
“The way you look at each other now is the same way you did before. Stars in your eyes, like nothing else mattered.” Sitting up, she reaches over and places her palm over Levi’s busy fingers. “Do me a favor. Go to my nightstand and grab that blue box inside the drawer.”
As always, Levi does what he’s told and makes his way to the wooden nightstand by her bed. He expects something decently sized but instead, he is met with a small pale blue box. A ring box. He picks it up carefully and turns it around to his mom with it pinched between two fingers, leaning back so that the drawer closes behind him.
“What’s this, Ma?” Levi asks as he brings it over to his mom’s awaiting hand.
Kuchel pops it open and turns it to Levi. It’s something he’s seen once, many years ago; A bridal set, one that was passed down from her mom. In the middle of a gold band sits a dainty oval ruby surrounded in “vines” that are beset by smaller diamonds in the shape of leaves. An engagement ring and wedding band – fitting together perfectly. Kuchel had shown Levi the set when he was really young, but she never wore them – which he suspects was to keep it safe from his father’s clutches. The gemstones sparkle brightly off the sunset that floods through her window.
“Mom…”
“Now listen here. I won’t be around forever – don’t look at me like that. I want you to have this now. I’m not saying to get married right away or even propose, but it would make me feel better if I knew you had this for when the time comes. And I trust you way more than I do Kenny.” With a snap, she closes the lid and shoves it in Levi’s direction.
He takes it reluctantly, not really sure what else to say. The thought dawns on him that his mom might not be around for his wedding day whether it be mentally or physically, and an ache shoots through his chest. But just like him, his mom’s decision was made. And there was no going back.
“Okay, mom.” He says back finally, closing his fingers around it tightly before standing up to slide it in his jean pockets.
“Don’t disappear on her again.” Kuchel stands up as well and places both of her cold, delicate hands on each side of Levi’s face as she stares hard at her son. “Promise me.”
Cupping his own hands over hers, he nods back as he says, “I promise.”
“Ms. Ackerman? It’s time for dinner.” A voice rings out from a staff member that stands in the open doorway of her room. It seems they have come to collect Kuchel to take her to the dining hall. 
“Yes, one moment.” Kuchel wraps her arms around Levi once more and holds him close for a moment before letting go. “I’ll see you soon?”
“Of course Ma, I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He says quietly then leans over to kiss her warm cheek.
“Can you get her a vase for those flowers, please?” Levi asks as he steps towards the staff member currently blocking his path.
“I’ll see to it, Mr. Ackerman.” They bow slightly and move aside.
As he brushes past, he sees you leaning against the wall as you scroll through your phone with his mother’s drawing pinched between tight fingers in the other hand. The golden rays from the sunset reflect off the white building and through the windows, sheathing you in a shower of sunlight like a spotlight. You are blissfully unaware of how breathtaking you are to him.
“Are you ready to go?” Levi asks, startling you from the video you were silently laughing at. You lock your phone and slide it into your back pocket before stretching a hand out to him to take. Your smile never fades as he laces his fingers through yours without hesitation and leads you out of Riverside Assisted Living, mumbling about where he would like to go for the evening.
.
That night, Levi surprises you with a picnic date.
By the time Levi pulls into his apartment, the sun is all but gone – leaving indigo and navy blues behind it. He told you that he wouldn’t be long and to stay in the running car. A few minutes go by until you see him again, bounding down the steps with a large blanket roll in one arm and a picnic basket in the other. As the overhead lights pop on while he opens the back door to unload what was in his arms, he shoots you a small smile. Then he holds something small out to you.
“Will you hold this for me?”
You hold your palm out for him, and he places a small box in the middle of it. It’s black with mesh wire on each side and a few little buttons on the top. It’s a bluetooth speaker, you surmise. When Levi hops back into the driver’s side, you raise an eyebrow at him.
 “I figured you wouldn’t want to eat dinner in silence.” He says as he reverses out of the parking spot then heads for the main road.
It doesn’t take very long to get to Jinae’s downtown – just minutes away from their café. But instead of turning down the street that would lead to it, he keeps driving until he gets to the park that once held the Sakura Festival so many months ago. The trees are all but green now, not even a small trace of pink hanging from the branches.
After parking in a small lot provided for park goers, Levi takes your hand and leads you down the subtle hill towards the bank of the river. It’s a lovely evening where the air is just warm enough with a light breeze. Fireflies start to flicker in and out of the whole park, illuminating whatever happened to be near it in a warm, yellow glow. And the only noises you hear are distant crickets and frogs coming from the river – which flows so gently that it doesn’t even look like it’s moving. The city lights reflect off the water like its glass.
There aren’t that many people out tonight as well, which is surprising given the time of year. But what surprises you even more is the one single tree lit up with a string of lights that encircle the trunk and up into the branches above. There’s nothing else next to it but you know it was meant for you.
This was the same tree you and Levi sat under while you waited for your friends at the festival back in April. Where the urge to kiss him was burning through your whole body. Where you felt your feelings for him concrete themselves into your mind.
Levi hands you the basket before letting go of your hand to roll the blanket out under the tree. In mere moments, his shoes are removed and placed neatly in the grass. He beckons you to join him as he stands in the middle of the blanket, the soft glow of the tree lighting up his face.
Kicking off your own shoes, you then step over to Levi with the basket dangling in your fingers. As he reaches over to take it back from you, he takes a step forward to plant a gentle kiss on your lips – one that lingers even when he pulls away.
“Is this okay?” he asks. At first, you think he’s referring to the kiss, but you realize his eyes are bouncing around you. There’s a subtle hint of anxiety in his gaze that wouldn’t be detectable by most people.
‘This is perfect.’ You reassure.
Despite how small the basket looked from the outside, you find out quickly that it held more than you thought. Once you and Levi settle down, he starts to unpack a myriad of items, mostly all food related. A plate with what looks like chicken salad sandwiches comes out first, all cut into small triangles. Then comes a small bowl of chopped up melon, a bag of chips, and a tall bottle of amber liquid – apple juice, Levi assured you. Finally comes out a small pillow that you recognize from Erwin’s couch. You can’t help but laugh as you sit up straight to get a better look at everything.
“What?” Levi asks with a frown.
‘It’s nothing. When did you prepare all of this?’ You inquire before picking up the chips to inspect what kind they were.
“Earlier this morning.”
You look up to see Levi eyeing you warily. Behind that façade of nonchalance, you see a very anxious man waiting for what you thought about all of this. You never took Levi to be the type to care about what other people thought, which means he really cared about what you had to say.
‘This is fantastic. Thank you for putting in all the effort.’ You lean over to give him a chaste kiss on the cheek. With a light blush, he hums back in response as he looks away to fiddle with something on his phone – at a glance, it looks like a music app. That reminds you about the speaker you had shoved into your bag before leaving the car, so you reach in and pluck it out. Levi takes it from your hand and a moment later, soft rock plays through each side of the box. Despite the small build, it sure is mighty in sound.
“There. Hungry?”
‘Starving.’
As Levi watches you nibble on your last piece of melon, he can’t help but think how perfect you are to him. Vulnerability wasn’t something that came easy to him but when you walked into his café and back into his life, it was like a scab that had been reopened. As uncomfortable as it was, he found the rawness that came with it very refreshing. What would it mean to stay by your side forever, he wonders. To wake up next to you for the rest of his life.
These thoughts raced through his mind earlier as he packed the basket and you waited in the car. The ring box burnt a hole in his pocket as he stood by his desk contemplating his choices. Tonight would be a perfect time to propose to you but still, something held him back. This was new to not only him, but you as well. Were you ready for something so life-altering? Was this even something you wanted? These were not topics that are generally brought up in casual conversation after only a week of officially dating.
No, he would know when it was time. For now, he was content with what he had, and he would wait for as long as you needed him to.
“Are you happy?” Levi leans back on a hand as he looks over to you.
You glance over to him in surprise at the question. Just as quickly, it dissolves into a big smile that lights up your eyes. Popping the rest of the fruit in your mouth, you sit up so you can sign easily.
‘I am. Are you?’
“I guess. It’s nice here.” He smirks at you, remembering that this is what he said to that same question months ago. “With you.” But he never got to say that to you then.
“You told me a while ago that words were not always needed to convey intent.”
‘I did, yes.’ Your face scrunches in confusion at the sudden statement.
Levi sits up before reaching into the basket with his left hand. For a moment you think he’s about to bring out dessert of some kind but instead he takes out a small paper bag, no bigger than three inches in width. He turns it upside down above his palm and out comes a gold chain necklace. A small cherry blossom pendant dangles off the side of his hand, glinting in the lights next to you. You scramble up on all fours as you inch closer to get a good look at it, knowing full well what it was.
“At first, this was bought as an apology. But now, I think this was also my way of saying that I love you, without me realizing it.” Levi mutters softly. Your wide eyes flicker from the pendant over to Levi’s face, lips parted in amazement. The necklace looks as if it was never broken, much less worn with the fresh polish it had received.
Before leaving Liberio, Levi had snuck away to a jeweler in town to see what they could do to fix it. In terms of damage, fortunately it was minimal. ‘For something so delicate, it sure is hardy.’ the jeweler had told Levi as they inspected it. He knew the jeweler was talking about the chain, but his mind drifted to you instead.
‘You fixed it for me.’
“It was important to you. I couldn’t leave it behind.” Levi gets up on his knees and scoots so that he’s behind you. Gingerly, he loops the chain around your neck and a few seconds later, it’s locked tight. You pinch the small metal pendant in between two fingers as you sigh in relief at the familiar weight hanging on your neck once again.
‘Thank you, Levi.’
You turn to face Levi and throw your arms around his neck as you lean in to kiss him. He startles at the abrupt movement but is quick to reciprocate as he places both hands on your waist and pulls you closer into him. He can feel you smiling into the kiss as it deepens.
As you both break apart, breathing heavily from the lack of air, you don’t lose your smile. Your hands raise to cup Levi’s face, your thumbs stroking his cheeks as you stare into those slate gray eyes of his that you loved so much.
“I don’t really have much else planned for tonight, so I can take you home-” You’re quick to cut him off with a shake of your head, much to Levi’s relief. He wasn’t ready to let you go either.
“Okay.” Levi muses. “We can stay here until you’re ready.”
The night carries on as you both lie on your backs, Levi holding you close in one arm. At some point, he started humming along to some of the songs that flowed through the speakers. The fireflies had gone to bed soon after. With your head resting on Levi’s chest, the gentle beating of his heart threatens to lull you into sleep.
As sure as the twinkling stars drift above, Levi Ackerman loves you.
And oh, how you love Levi Ackerman back.
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☾ Previous Chapter: June - Part 4 ☾ Next Chapter: Epilogue
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saltygilmores · 7 months
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THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: SEASON 3/EP 7: DANCE MARATHON EPISODE PT.2 (A VERY SHORT ONE SO WE CAN GET TO THE FUN STUFF ASAP)
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So several moots who are way smarter than me explained this joke to me. Paris is calling JayMonaise/Jamie Mayonaise a parrot because he is repeating himself so Paris says he should find a pirate's shoulder to sit on. Yeah okay fine that's valid but my Sit On A Pirate's Hook is still what I'm running with. Jumping back to the Gilmore residence, Rory has retreated to the kitchen where Lorelai grovels for her daughter's hand in dance, leaving Dean and Lane together in the living room. Why would you do that to Lane, Rory? I thought she was your friend.
Lorelai persuades Rory to become her dance partner, dashing Rory's dream of taking Dean's Dance Marathon Virginity (while Lorelai's dream is that sentence with the words Dance Marathon removed) and bullshitting with him on the sidelines (hey, that’s my job, except the Dean part). Rory will also have to cancel her plans to work on the boring-ass newspaper with Paris, Madelyn, Louise, and the rest. Who cares.
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Will you marry me?
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My queens. M&L love 35 year old undercover reporters sent on assignment to pose as high school students. Rory: You can't stop smiling. Paris recapping her date with Jay-Monaise: We went for coffee. He said he had a great time and that he finds me fascinating and he thought about me all the time.
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"I find you fascinating" has some real serial killer undertones. Paris then correctly refers to him as a Ted Bundy clone. But this episode only has room for one murderer, and he's still waiting in the wings.
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Yeah, I mean...he is kinda barking up the wrong tree here. Paris: Don't tell Madelyn and Louise, the second they find out I'm dating a guy they'll start singing the Trojan Man jingle. Rememeber the days when cheeky ads for condoms and erectile dysfunction pills aired shamelessly on tv? Those days, they sure were days. Rory promises to keep Paris' secret, continue to pledge her undying love to Paris, and enter "what is Trojan Man?" into Ask Jeeves later. This scene was wholly irrelevant except to further establish that Paris Geller's heterosexuality is hanging on by a piece of dental floss. Now let's get to the good stuff! In another post. I will need to push the boundaries of Tumblr's 30-Screen-Shots-Per-Post limit for this episode.
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tamaruaart · 9 months
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Hi :)
₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊
Questions:
About me ★ :
I mostly go by Tam or Rua but I also go by a LOT of other nicknames! (Tamarua, Tamari, Tama, Tamachi, Ruma, Tammy, Tamithy, etc... I'm on par with Mr Jalapeño fr 😼) I'm a digital & traditional artist and I mostly draw my OCs or characters I like.
I'm in A LOT of fandoms (LMK, JTTW, The Great Comet, Blood Meridian, Greek Myth, EPIC, Hamilton...). This blog respects and supports the LGBTQ+ community :> (WHERE ALL MY ACE BUDDIES AT??).
My preferred pronouns are She/They but I don't mind if you refer to me as a they/them or he/him. I'd say I don't usually get mad, and my humor is very... Uh, what's the word? Questionable? Yea, very questionable- I speak English and Croatian (🇭🇷)!
What art program do I use? ⁠★ :
I use Clip Studio Paint and Ibis Paint (If you want to know what brushes I use feel free to ask!)
Socials ⁠★ :
-Twitter: (@TamaRuaArt)
-Pixiv: (@Tamachi)
-Reddit: (@TamaRuaArt "Tam & Rua✩")
-tiktok: (@/tamaruaart "Tam✩")
(but I literally don't post anywhere else so- 💀)
Rules? ⁠★ :
-No offensive comments on certain groups
-No NSFW in my asks or replies
-No politics
-Keep your comments relative to the post
-No heavy-religion based topics (Unless that's what the post is about)
-No racism
-No sexism/misogyny/misandry (This is not a safe space for radical feminists who hate men)
-No homophobia or transphobia (nor hate to any other sexuality), this is a safe space for LGBT!!
If you don't follow these I'm just going to block you :D
What is this blog mostly about? ⁠★ :
OCs!! Well, I mostly use it to talk about my JTTW/LMK OC Zhaoyan (or just Zhao).
Zhao is a Celestial Witch who was brought along to the journey (against her will) as a healer for Tripitaka. Basically, she has the power to heal any wound, illness, disease etc. And general sorcery.
Besides that it's just whatever this stupif mind of mine is currently hyperfixating on
Notes on your OC's story? ⁠★ :
For now my tumblr blog is the only place where you can find out about her.
I do 100% plan to write an AO3 fanfic regards her one day (because she honestly has so much lore that isn't even jttw/lmk related). But not any time soon, I'm very busy with school and I still have to work her whole character out before I start writing. When I do publish the story I'll announce it here :D
Is this blog R18?⁠ ★ :
Not really, I'd say more 13-14+
Suggestions/requests? ⁠★ :
Sometimes? But only for close moots
Do I do coms? ⁠★ :
no
wewooweoweewowweee
yes
My Playlists:
Zhaoyan but as a ⁠★ Playlist ★ :
Quanshuǐ but as a ⁠★ Playlist★ :
Concept Cabin:
The Vengeance AU ⁠★ :
Fandoms:
-Greek Mythology (Hades/Hades II, The Odyssey and The Iliad, Paris: The Musical, EPIC: The Musical)
-Lego Monkie Kid
-The Prince of Egypt
-Wolfwalkers
-Hamilton
-The Great Comet of 1812
-Blood Meridian (I'm adopting kid idc)
If any of these things sound right up your alley, feel free to stay! :D
I mostly post about Greek Mythology, Blood Meridian and LMK on here though-
OC related things:
-OC introduction (Outdated, currently working on a new one!)★ :
-OC chibies ★ :
-OC (Zhao's) family tree ★ :
-OC ages ★ :
Free chibi OC commissions (closed):
TAGS:
OCs ⁠★ :
#lmk oc; Zhao- Any posts about Zhao
#lmk oc; Yueliang- Posts about Yue
#lmk oc; Quanshuǐ- Quanshuǐ posts
#lmk oc; Yuǎn'ān- Yuǎn'ān posts
Miscellaneous ★ :
#tam rambles- Pretty self-explanatory. Just me rambling~
#tam answers- Answering asks
#my art- Art made by me! :D
#Polly & Olivia- Posts about my cats!
ALT account: @tam-and-her-bullcraps (beware for it's a mess there-)
And that's basically all you need to know about me
buh-bYEEEEE 👋
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johannestevans · 1 year
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straight people in bdsm spaces are always so wild to me bc it's like.
bc of straight people's Thing about the gender binary, one of two things happens
either the woman is the submissive, and coincidentally the whole power dynamic just replicates misogynistic abuse
esp bc like, me and my bf were talking about it the last day, about how the dynamic between straight couples often continues outside of the bedroom and/or is not negotiated in the broader context of their relationship dynamic
like they'll confidently talk about it in other spheres or want to advertise how In Charge he is and how much she's submissive to him in the home and the domestic sphere - often he'll present it in a praising way but it's just. unequal labour disguised as kink
like yes, some ppl really get off on doing household labour and doing the domestic tasks, i know some ppl who are into that as kink and like, esp w the gender play that goes with it
but you have to understand your whys and whats, and crucially, cis men NEED to study it
they need to understand
a) what those tasks involve, and the amount of work and effort they realistically take their sub
b) how to do them themselves, bc if they're not capable of doing them to the same degree as their sub then. "oh it's just kink" is a moot point
bc if she's doing it anyway and you're going "Oh well, she gets off on it" like :/ ok, does she really? or were you gonna have her do it anyway, and you're just trying to make it into a kink thing bc you suck?
it makes me so mad too bc like. one of the most important things about bdsm is being able to relax into the dynamic and trust your dominant to take care of you, and to take care of the situation you're in
and like. how as a woman are you meant to relax and assume this man can take care of things when like… you can't trust him to wash a pan
like. i don't care if he's done 1000 hours of workshops and tutorials and read all the bdsm safety books in the world
if you refer to him looking after your shared child as "babysitting" or you have to write step-by-step instructions for him on how to defrost the meals you prepped for him before going on an overnight trip somewhere, how can you trust him to dom you responsibly lmao
and then the OTHER side which is like…
oh well, the woman is the dom, and that's female empowerment
and it's like. ok so now she's doing all the work, and also you only respect a woman when you can wank over it. and that doesn't really count, champ
like i hate it when people say that bdsm is inherently misogynistic because it's honestly not that, as evidenced by when queer people engage in diff forms of bdsm play
but like. a thing that's OFTEN inherently misogynistic, without both parties (and esp the cis man) going to the work to recognise and address it, is a heterosexual relationship between a cis man and cis woman
putting a whip in either of their hands doesn't automatically fix it
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sleptting · 2 years
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Could you be my first time ?
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤeat me up like apple pie
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤmake me not wanna die
love me rough and let me fly
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beevean · 9 months
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I've seen stans claiming issue #67 gets to take place after Frontiers and so there was a huge time skip of months based only in the fact Sonic called Amy to lunch as they apparently spend a time without meet each other (???) (Is not it some long running gag in the games that the characters can take long weeks or months to see each other again, thus being already used to this?)
But why?? Why is it so important to set this passage of time?! Do they are really desperate in make the link between games and comics? Because that really makes the comic's narrative sound and look pretty worse:
1- It would mean then that Surge and Kit has been a far more time hidding in Eggman's abandoned base than you would expect, that makes them look even more lazy losers than they already do and clash a lot more with the image of Thirsty For Revenge the comics insist in pass, since they moved NOT a finger in almost half a year (???) (Idk the exact time they want to claim and much less I care) But it makes the arguably near 0 effort of them become a surely negative effort.
2- So then, Blaze is still in vacation in Sonic's world??? Really? She just forgot her kingdom? Are the Sol Emeralds just in Sonic's world as if there was no risk of the universe to collapse (okay, that's a more overkill than what the game really states) if the Chaos Emeralds are reunited and put close to them? Just like that? As if she wasn't all afraid of get some vacantion in the start?
3- Then Mimic has already gone in missions with the DC for real, right? He's bonding with them, right? Surprisingly, there were NO real volunteers after all this time before Surge and Kit finally met Clutch, heard his plan, came to accept his conditions and just gone to the Restoration HQ by the front door, (assuming any of these step even passed by Surge's father head) right? Or, if had, then they left... Geez, guess a bossy rude bitch with a rock hard head can't be a inspiring leader after all, what a surprise, no?
4- The only positive thing of this time skip ideia is that it explains why everyone is so chill of the drooling psychic walking around as well as make no objections to him about use his powers... And why Silver is so chill after the whole fiasco... Buuuuuut, now he's acting Just Exactly the way Lanolin accused him to act when she made the scandal to kick him out the Diamond Cutters (Not only the absence of security helmets or vests, he's playing with the food of the thousands of hungry kids he meant to help, Ian Flynn, a master of self sabotage)
Btw, sorry for this rant, feel free to just ignore if you prefer... And sorry for bringing the Lanolin discourse all over again...
Now that I think about it, it's been a year since Frontiers came out and IDW still hasn't referenced it. Even considering that it takes multiple months for issues to be finalized, I'd say enough time has passed that anything Flynn and Stanley have written since, say, December 2022 has been released. So huh, not even a small reference to that talkative moon, or anything to reflect the supposed new life goal of the gang. It's like it's not canon after all :)
Anyway. Time skips in IDW are indicated. This is how we know that the camping arc takes place months after the beginning of the MV arc because the apocalypse lasted the whole winter, and how we can say that it's complete bullshit because Sonic should have been dropped dead from exhaustion. No time indication, no significant time skip. This is a moot point for me, so I don't have much to add.
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thatiranianphantom · 1 year
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No, but it really is going to be okay, a rambly Nancy Drew/Nace meta
I'm just closing my eyes and picturing this:
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I feel like you can sum up my thoughts on 412 as this:
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But should you be in the mood for a brain dump (hopefully a reassuring one?), click that cut, my friend.
Okay, let's get some disclaimers out of the way to begin with.
I only read the subtitles, and watched certain parts, didn't see the entire episode. So there could very well be nuance here that I am missing.
I, too, am frustrated with how this season has shook out. Being disappointed that they are literally leaving things to the finale is valid. I would never have done the season like this given the chance. And being let down by that is okay! Goddamn, there was a lot of lobster boy in this season, and they, as of now, inexplicably expected the viewers to be emotionally invested in him?
I could end up being the world's biggest clown, and be 100% wrong on everything, or again, there is nuance here I didn't see or consider, leading to me being wrong. I am accepting that as a real possibility.
HOWEVER,
Here is what (to my understanding) the show would like me to believe:
Due to something maybe involving the pickled curse, Ace had to choose to save Captain Thom or the captain Alice, and he saved Thom but couldn't save Alice. Captain Thom and Ace are alive and do not remember, and yet Alice is still dead.
Ace was riddled with guilt and called Nancy, who on her own, erased this, mooting the conversation we saw in 408. This only erased the memory of the sin, not the sin itself. Nancy didn't undo the sin, she just erased the memory. We know this, because Alice is still dead.
Ace and Nancy are no different in 408 than they were in 409, the only thing that changed is the events of the night of 408, which they do not remember, thus it wouldn't have altered their behaviour.
George, Nick, Bess and all of the crew were unaffected, memories and behaviour wise, by anything that happened. There is nothing supernatural coming between Ace and Bess, nothing that is making Nick push Nancy towards Tristan, nothing that is making Bess and George particularly close.
The Nancy of 409-411, the one who referred to Ace as a "relationship" and her "ex", is no different from the Nancy of before 408, who was pining hard over Ace. Again, the only thing that changed, neither of them remembered.
Ace and Nancy are cold and bitter to each other in a way they've never been in 4 seasons. He didn't want her at the Seder, so much to the point that Bess panics when she shows up, despite inviting both her dads and her dad's girlfriend. And yet that relationship, which, again, is portrayed quite differently in 409-411 than before, is enough for Nancy to abandon the entirety of her morals and belief system to save and protect Ace. Instantly.
Nancy and Ace have some memory of being something to each other, enough for them to acknowledge them both not having moved on, but the actual interactions they are referring to are and have been extremely vague since 409.
Ace, the person who knows Nancy better than anyone, is attached enough to a ghost that he will yell at Nancy repeatedly and ask her why she has to solve something. A ghost he met what was canonically probably no more than a few days ago.
Tristan, who has been in 5 episodes, and the ghost, who has been in 3, are just as significant as love interests as the 4-season buildup to Nace.
George is moving away from Horseshoe Bay, and completely supports Nick's relationship with Jade (this one may be real, but my Fanson heart doesn't want it to be).
Very little from early on in the season connects to later in the season in a significant way.
The connection Nancy and Tristan have (a relationship 5 episodes in the making) is stronger than the connection she feels to Ace (a relationship 4 seasons in the making).
Look. LOOK. Look.
Maybe some of this is true. Maybe indeed, Nancy and Ace have truly just moved on, they are different people, they are interested in different people. Maybe platanchors can't platanchor forever, and they truly did intend to do away with 4 seasons of character development (How very HIMYM of them).
But in Nancy Drew, a show that nearly always lays out its mysteries with explicit, agonizing detail, and centers itself around the fundamental concept of love being the most powerful thing in the world, capable of spanning time and space, that is a lot to ask me to swallow at face value. All of this together makes very little sense, given what we've seen, not only in the past season but the past year.
And these are a few things that I find, at best, extremely fishy about the whole affair.
Why hasn't Nace or anyone mentioned the curse since 407? Nick is pushing Nancy to Tristan despite having a despondent Ace grieving over Nancy at his doorstep two episodes ago?
How am I expected to buy that between 408 and 409, Nancy and Ace just up and moved on, decided they were nothing to each other, and jumped right in with their whole asses to their love interests, if the sin that was erased only changed the events of one night, which until now, neither remember (and Ace still doesn't). The fights also really seemed to show that what they remember and what we, the audience, saw, is fundamentally different.
The mystery seems so lackluster. I don't know how to explain it except that the writing on the mystery seems so lazy in a way it never has before, unless there was a twist that upends the entire thing that they've been laying hints for this entire time. I believe we still don't know what started the fire in the first place. We know that in order for the Sin Eater to erase a sin, you have to pay a toll. What if the toll was Nancy and Ace forgetting what they were and Nancy being bound to the Sin Eater? That would explain both the forgetting and the connection with Tristan. We still don't know what Chief Lovett and Nashua's connections are. Via Kennedy, we still don't know Tristan's full importance.
The ND writers are very well aware of what the fandom wants. They are extremely interactive with the fandom. The writers are still talking to the fandom. I just have so much trouble envisioning a scenario where they essentially say "lol just kidding on that nace thing, enjoy the chronicles of nancy and lobster boy" in the penultimate episode, unless there is a twist we weren't expecting that brings the whole thing back to Nace.
Openly admitting this is thinner and more subjective, but I feel like Kennedy has been about as reassuring as she is allowed to be, the writers have been tweeting things like "there is nothing to be afraid of", and this episode has been described as setting the bases for 413's home run (or something to that effect, I don't sportsball).
It almost seems like they want us to take this at face value, to set it up for the Nace twist at the end. ND loves its ending twists.
And all of this (so close to shutting up I promise) brings me to the 413 description.
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Few things here. While it is possible that Nancy figuring out the sin she erased was the "most shocking discovery yet" I have some...pretty severe doubts. And if it wasn't, we haven't gotten to that revelation yet. And we know based on this description that this revelation has something to do with Ace. Again, it is possible that this is Nancy finding out about her sin, but it almost feels like that's been dealt with in 412? Are they going to...rehash it again in 413? I doubt it. This lends a lot of credence to my theory that there is a twist yet to be had. One that will bring us epically back around to Nace.
Now, could I be wrong about all of this? Maybe. I haven't seen the finale, I am but a clown on the internet. And again it is valid to be disappointed in the way the show has chosen to approach this. I do think there is a conversation to be had about the somewhat aggressive way we consume media, especially when given access to artists via social media, but that is an entirely separate conversation. But do I think Nace is over and done for good and we should just give up now? All I can say is
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ruiyuki · 1 year
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Aight folks, I went to watch Providence with Japanese subs TWICE in three days now and after the initial emotional anechoic chamber it put me through, I can finally recount the movie and make sense of its plot and themes. So here is a ⚠️‼️ VERY SPOILER HEAVY RECAP ‼️⚠️ of the whole movie (literally very long, scene-by-scene of everything I can rmbr) & some commentary under cut.
The movie opens with a group of assailants raiding a cargo ship. Seems like their target is a woman aboard named Professor Stronskaya who's accosted in her room by a man with red dreads and a blond man. Over the ship we see Kougami flying on a plane with Frederica over the radio. They're there to rescue the Professor. Kougami drops down to the ship (in only what I can call, a flying squirrel suit) and there's a shoot out. He finds the Professor's room but she's dead. He's attacked again and hears somebody speaking to him an excerpt of the bible. Things are exploding on the ship and Kougami escapes to safety by jumping into the ocean.
Cut to Nona tower after the OP credits. Akane is speaking at a meeting of Directors about Japan's upcoming decision to abolish the legal system now that judicial proceedings are more or less moot with Sybil in place. We meet Atsushi Shindou, Director of Welfare who tries to keep the peace among the members and he says a guest was suppose to join them but did not make it to the meeting. Akane gets an urgent call from Mika and excuses herself from the meeting.
Mika tells Akane about the attacked cargo ship that's sailed up to Japan's port and tells her to "stop playing politician and get back here already" lol. Shindou approaches Akane and accompanies her to the cargo ship. Turns out it was Shindou that invited Professor Stronskaya as the guest for the meeting and that she is a global researcher who wrote a document called "The Stronskaya Papers". They have a discussion in the car ride where Shindou tells Akane he has high hopes for her, but also, maybe she shouldn't piss off people that could help her in the long run. Big oops mood but also, nice to see our classic Akane still, haha.
Akane and Shindou arrive at the site of the cargo ship where we find Mika being difficult to Frederica to say the least lol. Frederica is with the Director of Foreign Affairs (who I honestly forgot his name so I'll just refer to him as "DFA"). Shindou calls up Kasei and she instructs Division 1 to hand over the case to Foreign Affairs. There's a funny moment after of Mika badmouthing the situation and Shindou sneaks up on her telling her to watch what she says cuz the DFA has a really special hearing aid LMAO.
Division 1 recaps to Akane what they could find on the ship in the short amount of time while Akane also fills in her team abt Professor Stronskaya. Gino mentions they found the Professor dead but confirming it would be difficult bc she was decapitated. Hinakawa says the Professor sent one last message out before she died and it was to Jouji Saiga (👀‼️).
Akane calls Saiga-sensei in the privacy of the MWPSB car. Shindou knocks on the window and joins in on the call. Turns out Shindou and Saiga-sensei know each other from their university days where Shindou was Saiga's senpai (again another 👀‼️). They talk abt Prof Stronskaya but Saiga says he wants to speak to Akane alone about it.
Akane meets Saiga-sensei in his isolation unit and they talk abt how he knows Shindou, Prof Stronskaya and the Stronskaya Papers. Saiga tells Akane the papers are about Sybil and its impact on society and that they could very well change the stability of the world and Japan. He confirms the last message he got from Prof Stronskaya is the location to a P.O. box in Dejima, Kyushu where the papers are kept. Akane asks if Saiga would help her retrieve the papers, ofc Saiga agrees.
Before they head out to Dejima, Akane meets with Kasei alongside Mika, Frederica, and the DFA. They debrief on the assailant group and its here we learn of the main baddie of our movie: a man call Tonami who was part of the Japanese military group, the "Peacebreakers" formed by the MOFA. The Peacebreakers were active overseas 5 years ago on behalf of the MOFA, but all its members including Tonami went rogue. Now that they're back in Japan, its decided this will be a joint operation to reign them in. Kasei says smth along the lines of "you cant hunt feral animals with dogs so what better way but with bloodhounds, make good use of him" referring to you know who !!!!
Cut to Division 1's office. Gino's livid and ready to start a fight at the sight of Kougami back in Japan (he's really yelling "how dare you show your face here again"). Sugo breaks them up as Akane, Mika, and Frederica enter the office. Kougami greets Akane with calling her "Inspector" (🥺) while Akane (tries to?) keeps a poker face.
Akane, Gino, Sugo escort Saiga with Frederica and Kou to Dejima while Mika, Yayoi, Hinakawa and Shion stay in Tokyo as support. They discuss Tonami again on the plane where Gino asks a question and Kou tried to answer but Gino retorts a petty "I wasn't asking you" LMAO. They arrive at one of the MOFA buildings for their stay and it's noted that Dejima is where all the refugees/immigrants live in Japan while they await naturalization.
Saiga looks into profiling Tonami and the Peacebreakers. He and Kou discuss it over liquor and Saiga-sensei gives some more dad advice to Kougami (he tells Kou to apologize to Akane while he still can 😂). Kou calls up Akane on the balcony a while later and they talk about why he's returned. Akane hangs up on him when he says he doesnt regret his decision (and his face is priceless 😂😂😂) cuz she was also hoping he would apologize but he didnt. Frederica meets with DFA for something and he tells her dont let Kougami or Saiga know of their plan.
The next morning the team goes to retrieve the papers at the P.O. box and there's another Saiga-dad moment where he teases Kougami for "[he] couldnt do it, huh" while Kou plays dumb (😂). The P.O box address was a fake, Prof Stronskaya didnt leave the document in there to be safe. Turns out DFA also planned Saiga to be a setup: there was a leak in the MOFA to lure the Peacebreakers targeting Saiga-sensei for the papers. Now the Peacebreakers—including the dreads guy and blond guy (now named Kai) from before—are attacking, and its a matter of keeping Saiga safe.
Akane, Kou, and Frederica try to evacuate Saiga to the extraction point while Gino and Sugo fend off Peacebreakers on their own. They find out the Dominators dont work on Peacebreaker soldiers bc of (artifically) low Crime Coefficients and have to resort to brute force or guns. Kou's group is attacked by the man with red dreads shortly after walking past some bodies with bomb traps (where Kougami FUCKING RAN to protect his wife shield Akane from one that set off... gouchisousama deshita 🙏). Kou gets trapped in a shoot out with other Peacebreakers while Frederica engages the red dreads guy but gets overpowered. The red dreads guy ends up holding Saiga hostage at knife point but Kou manages to shoot the dreads guy in the head (literally mere inches from Saiga-sensei, Kou that's insane. Saiga calls him out on it lol).
But the red dreads guys isnt down yet (?!?!) Or at least, he is suppose to be very dead but his body still moves and talks like he's possessed by something. Kou engages him again but Saiga gets slashed and starts to fall off a ledge of the atrium they're at. Akane runs to catch him but she can't pull him up. Saiga-sensei looks up to Akane and puts his faith in her, tells her smth along the lines of "justice and truth can be seen by those high above and he believes she is capable of reaching there". He lets himself slip out of her grasp and falls to his death, crashing into the fountain under the atrium.
I asked where was Saiga-sensei in S3 but I didnt want the answer to be he fucking DIES 😭😭😭
Akane runs down to the fountain as Kou still tries to handle the dreads guy. Eventually Frederica takes over as Kai and the Peacebreakers make their retreat now that their target expired and Kou chases after Kai. There's a Kougami vs Kai 1v1 in a holo room while Frederica, now with Gino, fights the possessed dreads guy (there's a lot of hand-to-hand combat sequences in this movie) also Sugo got shot but he's ok. Kai manages to escape from Kougami, but not before monologuing at him another excerpt from a book and leaving Kou a dagger with a tassle stuck in his shoulder. Gino punches a hole through the dread guy's torso with his prosthetic arm just as the dreads guy sets off a grenade in suicide. Gino thankfully disconnects his prosthetic in time and jumps back to safety.
In the aftermath, Frederica finds out the DFA is missing bc of the Peacebreaker attack (he was initially observing their whole decoy plan from a surveillance room). Akane chews her out, but Shindou suddenly appears in Dejima and says he'll handle the clean up. Akane starts to get suspicious of Shindou at this point but there is nothing she can do since no one wanted Saiga-sensei to die. Kougami and Akane share an elevator ride where Akane's starting to cry over losing Saiga-sensei, and Kou gives her a pep talk of "keeping calm, she can cry after the case is over" (a callback to the pep talk he gave her after Yuki died by Makishima in S1 🥺).
Once Kou is back in his room, he thinks about the monologue Kai gave him and runs a search. The excerpt was from a book called the "Great Aso". He calls up Shion for the forensics result from the tassled dagger and she says the tassle was made of horse hair. He asks her to do a search of horses location restricted to Aso, Japan while the conversation moves to cognitive and scientific theory of body possession (makes sense given that Shion is a physician), and more specifically—possession of a body by a god?
By morning we get a scene of Shindou meeting with Arata, Kei, and Maiko in Dejima. If you've been paying attention to the names you'll realize Maiko is Prof Stronskaya's daughter. Shindou is there delivering the news of her death to the young'uns. On top of that, he mentions Kei's older brother—Akira—might be able to return for Kei and Maiko's wedding happening shortly after Lunar New Year. Shindou and Arata leave and stroll through Dejima as the immigrant residents prepare Lunar New Year festivities in the district.
There's a scene change to now watch the Peacebreaker side of things. We follow Kai as he walks through their secret base. He stops to observe Tonami speaking to Peacebreaker soldiers like a religious cult leader and it is revealed they kidnapped the DFA and are water torturing him. We follow Kai for a bit longer to his quarters where he struggles with body convulsions, takes some pills, then smash his reflection in the mirror (looking hot doing it). He gets a call from Tonami telling him to handle the DFA again as Tonami is now leaving to meet with their leader called The General.
Back to Akane's crew: Mika, Akane, Frederica have now found the Peacebreaker's secret base located in Aso, Kyushu thanks to Kougami's search. They request a raid with the use of traditional guns from Kasei who allows it. There's a really nice sequence of Kou and Gino partnered up being the vanguard of their raid. They get stuck in a gun fight against turret drones though and have to hide behind stone pillars until the drones are suddenly disabled. But by whom?
Surprise! It's Kai, who has extracted the DFA. Turns out Kai is an undercover agent for the DFA and Shindou, and his real name is ‼️ Akira Vasily Ignatov ‼️ Kei's brother!!!! Now it all makes sense—dropping the monologue and tassle dagger as clues.
Akira tells Kougami and Ginoza to restrain him and take him in before Tonami finds out about the base. DFA is recovered but needs medical attention, so Akane, Frederica, and Kou escort them both by heliplane back to Dejima while Akane leaves investigation of the Peacebreaker base to Gino. Aboard the plane, Akira reveals the details of the Stronskaya Papers: its actually a formula for a simulation using Sybil's Crime Coefficient concept to calculate society's likelihood of disagreement and unrest—a Conflict Coefficient. The Conflict Coefficient could be used to settle wars or elevate them which is why Tonami wants the papers. Akira reveals the data is stored in a chip implant in his brain, but also says there's a second implant in his brain from the Peacebreakers called "The Divider". The Divider can negate negative thoughts and emotions by sharing it to another entity, which is how they fake Crime Coefficients read by Dominators, and it's also how Tonami possesses a soldier's body.
When they reach Dejima, they're greeted by Shindou. Shindou thanks Akira saying it must have been hard on him. Akane requests to talk with Shindou, Frederica tends to DFA and Kou takes Akira in for his statement. Akira reveals he was the one that killed Prof Stronskaya to protect the mission (and it hurt him to do so now knowing their familial ties 😔) and that Tonami can possess members of the MOFA bc each MOFA agent already has a brain implant for translation, while Shindou explains why Akira was undercover in the first place. Akane questions Shindou on why everything he does seems to have no flaws, like things are perfectly laid out for him; he's about to answer when they're interrupted by Kougami's urgent call. Kou's and Akira's questioning was interrupted by Tonami possessing DFA who locked Frederica in the elevator and shot Kou in the leg. He's hijacked Akira's body and making a run for it, trying to escape with the Stronskaya data.
When Akane and Shindou catch up to the Tonami-possessed Akira, Akira tries to overcome the body possession and struggles pointing a gun at himself to suicide. He manages to shoot himself in the chest and chucks the gun at Shindou, pleading to be killed so Tonami can't get the Stronskaya data. Shindou obliges (but not before Akira asks him to look after Kei) and shoots Akira dead as Lunar New Year fireworks go off in the background and Akane and team watches on. Kasei arrives in Dejima to speak to Shindou.
We get to the interlude before Act 3 of the movie now. Akane visits Kougami in hospital bed recovering from the leg injury regretful that he couldnt prevent the loss of Akira. Akane reminds him that they're a team, and they'll get Tonami next time (🥺 again, it's a nice call back to S1). Kasei meets with Shindou in his car in the middle of Dejima's Lunar New Year festivities, where Shindou addresses Kasei as "Sybil System". They discuss the events and Shindou taking responsibility for it. Kasei leaves Shindou with "a parting gift" and exits the car. Not long after, Shindou calls Akane to meet him, still in the midst of festivities and explains Kei is getting married very soon and he requests for Akane that news of Akira's dead not made public til after the wedding. He then invites Akane to attend the wedding too.
Shindou and Akane arrive for the wedding where they're greeted by Arata. Arata walks Maiko down the aisle and Kei and Maiko are really cute at the altar. Shindou gives a speech at the reception (that really is more cryptically directed to Akane and Arata, I think 👀) then immediately disappears after the speech. Arata and Akane notice Shindou's gone and go searching. He's in his car, looking at a photo of him with his wife and a child Arata. The parting gift from Kasei is a gun. He shoots himself. Arata and Akane find him.
At the morgue, Arata, Kei and Maiko mourn Shindou. Arata, distressed, tries to get answers from Akane to make sense of the events but Akane doesnt know either. The joint investigation between MOFA and Division 1 is called off and Division 1 is ordered back to Tokyo. Akane meets with Kasei who shows her a video message from Tonami. The Peacebreakers have relocated to the northernmost islands (the Kumail Islands? Or smth, I forgot the name) of Japan declaring independence with The General as their leader. Apparently Sybil has conversed with this General of theirs and agreed on the terms, and wants Akane to deliver the Stronskaya Papers to Tonami (as a peace offering I guess?). Kasei basically tells Akane to shut up and go with it, Akane will be out of MWPSB soon anyway as Sybil will have her take Shindou's place as the new Director of Welfare.
Ofc, Akane's never gonna "just shut up and go with it" lol. She reviews the notes Saiga-sensei came up while profiling Tonami that concludes with "God?" and calls up Kougami asking him to join her in solving this case. He says he was going to go with her regardless if she asked (🥺). Frederica overhears Akane's call and she agrees too to "finish the job their boss failed to do".
So the team assembles at the office. The plan is for Kou, Frederica and Gino to arrive at the islands to take down as many Peacebreaker soldiers before Akane arrives via MWPSB heli as the decoy for Tonami with the Stronskaya Papers. Sugo takes care of the transportation issue, and Mika, Shion, Yayoi again work logistisical support. We learn that the Peacebreakers have a satellite in the stratosphere which is how they do jamming and control The Divider devices, so Sugo will fly a drone within its airspace after dropping Kou's team off for Hinakawa to hack it. Akane makes a point that they'll operate by MWPSB standards and by that will mean use of Dominators, and she's already arranged for Kou and Frederica as temporary users.
I really like her speech of "if we are going to enforce the law, we will do so as MWPSB detectives" 🥺 bc that brings me back to her learning what it means to be a detective in S1 from Kou and Masaoka.
Everyone divides into their assignments. Kou's team loads onto the boat Sugo has arranged with the JDF submarine. There's a snarky tsundere-Mika moment as she gives Gino a new Dominator she's had R&D work on. Akane sees Kougami & co. off, though not without Kou tell her to not do anything reckless as the decoy and she replies "I can't guarantee that.." / Kougami: "Oi. 😑" / "So make sure you get there (to me) quickly".
On the boat, Gino and Kou have a heart-to-heart finally with Gino asking again why Kougami's come back. He says he's trying to do the responsible thing and Gino think it's at least an improvement. They share the thought that they are the reason for Akane tying herself down to her job as an inspector, and want to protect her for it.
I really loved this part bc you can feel the friendship is still there between Gino and Kou, and although they now see each other in different roles with respect to Akane (metaphorically, Gino being a "shield" for her, and Kougami as her "sword"), the shared guilt and understanding of their motivation ever since end of S1 is there which is what makes the team so great.
Kougami & co. get to the islands, setup, and start infiltrating the Peacebreaker base. Sugo flies the drone to the satellite after but is met with laser defences trying to shoot it down. (There's a whole CGI sequence for this part and the jury's still out on whether I like it or not 😂). Akane arrives at the base where Tonami greets her. She says the Stronskaya Papers are now in her brain from Akira's implant and that she wants to meet the General before handing them over. It's revealed that the General is a medical AI (the Bifrost in S3) that was initially created to support latent criminal rehabilitation within the Sybil System, but the project was scrapped and later repurposed by the MOFA for the Peacebreakers. Essentially (for what I can interpret at least), the Peacebreakers were created to do the MOFA's overseas dirty work where the implant in their brain would transmit negative thoughts & emotion to the medical AI as a sinkhole for the soldiers to stay.. unburdened (is the best word I can describe? Somebody pls correct me if I understood this wrong lol). Tonami and fellows resented that, the hypocrisy of them being used like that, which prompted their defection and subsequently trying to claim the medical AI as their own system to elevate world conflict through the addition of the Stronskaya Paper's simulation algorithm with religious rhetoric. Tonami tried to added Prof Stronskaya's decapitated brain to The General in place of the papers, but it didnt work which is why he's still after them. Akane debates that AI systems like Sybil and The General cannot replace the will of humanity but Tonami will have none of that and shoots her in the thigh.
Outside, Kougami's team is fending off Peacebreakers while Sugo drone-piloting is trying to hold out long enough for Hinakawa to hack the satellite. They cut it very close with Hinakawa excitedly exclaiming when they're finally hacked in. (I am so proud of him this whole movie cuz there were small moments where Hinakawa openly voices his thoughts on the case and his hacking capabilities: "if the enemy is using this type of thing, then I should be able to hack it"... it's a mile growth from the meek enforcer we met in S2!!). Shion & Yayoi use the hacking to shut down the Dividers creating fake Crime Coefficients and to put the Dominators online for Kou, Gino, and Frederica. The next bit is a nice sequence of Kougami initializing the Dominator's start up UI with the PSYCHO-PASS theme playing (more callbacks to S1, god I missed these moments). Gino's new Dominator from Mika is apparently a multi-target lock on Dominator, and Frederica's gets a new railgun Dominator with a multi-shot Destroy Decomposer. Once they get mostly control of the battle, Gino shouts at Kougami to "get to Tsunemori!" (he actually says "Tsunemori ō mamoru!" in Japanese which made me keel over cuz that can be translated as "go protect Tsunemori" 🥹), and Kou bolts.
Things are looking alright until Shion, Yayoi & Hinakawa realize the satellite isnt stopping its motion and is actually on course to crash into the Peacebreaker base as a fail-safe for being hacked. At this point, Mika actually suddenly left the operations room to go to Kasei. She argues to Sybil that Akane is too valuable to let die, so Sybil pulls the strings to get the JDF to shoot down the satellite before it crashes into the base. (I do appreciate that for all her attitude, Mika does respect Akane and see the importance she has in her role. We see another moment of this later on too. This movie finally moved me from negative opinion of Mika to neutral lol). The debris from the shot down satellite fall onto the base where Gino & Frederica are fending off the last of the Peacebreakers and they take cover. We finally catch up with Akane and Tonami.
Akane's handcuffed by Tonami and bleeding from her leg profusely but she's still fighting back. She crawls far enough to reach her Dominator that has fallen on the ground and chucks it to the terminal that controls The General. Seems like she actually hid the Stronskaya data in her Dominator and the contact with the terminal updates The General's AI. Akane says she places faith in the system that The General's AI will choose to opposite outcome that Tonami wants, where the AI will choose reducing conflict with the peace Sybil brings to society. The AI does just that and assimilates itself once again with Sybil, updating itself to remove Tonami's influence within its system and shutting the base down. Tonami is ofc, livid at Akane's ideologies and shoots her again in the abdomen. She gets held at gunpoint with Tonami standing over her just as Kougami arrives. There's more debate between Tonami and Akane about the nature of using AI systems in society, with Kougami listening on, gun in hand (honestly his facial expression looks really unimpressed with what Tonami is saying during this part, I couldn't help but laugh LMAO). At the end of Tonami's spiel, Kougami shoots him in the head just when it looked like Tonami would shoot Akane again, and Kougami says that its true, he agrees with what Tonami is saying. Akane deflates saying she "promised she wouldnt let Kougami do that (kill/break the law) again" but Kougami explains that although he agreed with Tonami, he believes in Akane's sense of righteousness, and for that he also needs to be judged (by her and the laws upheld by their society with the Sybil system). He unlocks Akane's handcuffs (and there was someone that posted about him cuffing himself to Akane as they get up, symbolic of her arresting him, but I didnt catch that 😔) and bridal carries Akane out.
The case's aftermath is a recovered Akane meeting in Sybil's brain room. Gino and Sugo had gotten approvals to transfer from Division 1 to MOFA, while Kougami was placed in a cell as his punishment for breaking the law (I guess), but he's not there for long since Sybil deems him useful enough so he'll be approved to go back to MOFA soon. Sybil reveals the roles DFA and Shindou had with the case and that it will be buried with their deaths as Akane soon accepts her new position as Shindou's replacement. Sybil says Akane will walk the path of Atsushi Shindou as they've prescribed as Akane leaves the room (which didnt click to me until my second watching here that the reason there were never any flaws in Shindou's "moves" was bc Atsushi Shindou knew the truth about Sybil, considering that Arata is criminally asymptomatic. Shindou went along with everything he did with no flaws bc it was already arranged by Sybil.. in order to protect his son..). Shion, Yayoi, and Hinakawa comment that things will be different in Division 1 now that so many members have left, but now it's time to watch Akane's promotion ceremony broadcasted on live TV.
While the broadcast is happening, Kougami reads a letter from Akane in his cell. She writes about her thoughts on the case and tells him she now knows what she needs to do to question the nature of justice in their society, and its something that only she can do. Kougami realizes immediately what she intends and responds to that with a pained expression calling her an idiot (mirroring his letter to her in S1). At the ceremony, Akane dressed in uniform goes through the delegation, but when she's about to accept the promotion from Kasei, she pulls out a gun and shoots Kasei on stage with a blank expression. Mika, running security at the event points her Dominator at Akane where it reads her Crime Coefficient at 60. Akane leaves Mika with a bittersweet "please take care of Division 1" and Mika angrily says she cannot accept this. The news broadcasts that Akane committed a crime live on air in public but her Hue remained clear, bringing forth public questioning on the Dominator's judgement and that the dissolution of the legal system that was in dicussion at the beginning of the film is now halted. Akane is arrested and converses with Sybil in the MWPSB paddywagon, resolute in her decision. The film ends with Akane brought into her isolation cell where she can finally breakdown crying while Kougami leaves his cell promising to get Akane out.
👏👏👏 and that's it. Hopefully this will help anyone having trouble following the film (or aren't able to watch) bc I certainly missed a lot on first watch. Personally, I loved this film as a cumulation and celebration of the 10 years of this franchise. I have a few extra thoughts on how themes in this movie would fit with the rest of the franchise, but I actually haven't watched First Inspector yet and feel the need to rewatch S3 with a new perspective now. Hopefully enough people will get to see the film with international release now so maybe we'll get a S4. Prayer circles in the meantime I guess 😔🙏
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sasoxichomoshi · 3 months
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lately i have been chewing in my mind this specific question as to why did godslayer choose the sun sword
cause think with me, he could choose between the bow and sword, but he sought the sword, specifically
then i remembered the reverse au drawings my moot Ads (omg, my moot, what an honor) did a while back that partially answered it but after pondering a bit more i think i can develop the idea with a reference i have been orbiting around lately: the book Goddesses, a compilation of works from Joseph Campbell (damn him again)
so first let's put the cards in the table
tho the bow and the sword are what we see, they are here just as symbols of what they represent - the bow as the half moon and the sword as a sun ray, they are a part of the whole
diving more into the symbolic aspect, the (sun) sword is straight forward, its purpose is just to kill, while the (moon) bow on the other hand exists in duality - it's there, be it to war or hunting (and here, hunting means the extension/perpetuation of life)
both Godslayer and Hunter embodies these qualities in different levels
now addressing the celestial side of the weapons, i believe there's a reason (tho i cannot say it was the creators intention) as to why Godslayer is represented by the sun and Hunter, by the moon
in short, the sun and moon (the celestial bodies in real life, to make it clear), as explained in the book Goddesses, received throughout history religious and spiritual meaning tied with life and death (or eternity and time)
it's explained that the sun, initially, was a female symbol, and the moon a male one, but when the male centric religions started to gain dominance the roles inversed
"[...]It was from the period of his reign that the Babylonian epic of the sun god Marduk dates, whose victory over Tiamat, the old goddess of the primeval sea, marks the moment of a decisive transfer of loyalty in that quarter of the world from the universal goddess of nature to an assortment of politically established tribal gods."
here we can already trace a parallel with the game events, tho a bit shy - the main cult in the island is towards mother eagle and as time passes, her cult shrinks due to Godslayer overtaking
the parallels deepens when you take in consideration what the sun and moon are symbols for
"[...]The moon dies into the sun: the bull is pounced upon by the lion. The moon is the celestial sign of the sacrifice.[...]" "[...]What the moon, the bull, and the serpent represent is the power to throw off death and be born again." "[...]The sun always represents the killing, drying, desiccating principle and so the killer is always associated with the solar power.[...]"
Godslayer passed through the golden sun-door to eternity; and by lying his curse right in Sauro's plateau, not only he cursed the world but also took over the sun - now all his actions are holy, as it's all purified in the everlasting flames
Hunter then embodies the cyclical flow of sacrifice, hunter after hunter came to the island and all failed in stopping the curse - as the moon dies into the sun, it is also ready to rebirth
Austin in one of his videos talks about how Hunter is there for the ultimate sacrifice
"one of the narrative threads i had lashed onto early in the project was the idea that the Hunter doesnt initially know why she's being delivered to this island, why she has been sent there, and to me it always felt like a sacrifice. her civilization, wherever she comes from send her there hoping she might oppose the darkness, but they've sent countless hunters for time eternal and with no results to speak of: the darkness had continued to spread in the world, and so it had become almost a form of ritual sacrifice, like throwing... the young maiden into the volcano so to speak. and i thought i like the idea that she manages to do what none have done before her, but not just in actually defeating the darkness but even in learning what was going on there and even understanding her purpose, in that way the game, to me, feels very much like a metaphor for life itself. and so the song had to reflect all that, wrap all that together, and the specific idea that i liked the best was that her goal is to basically give her life in full, unhesitant service to others"
then, in the extended credits, Hunter is saved by the eagle - throwing off death to be reborn (this is one of the qualities of the hero), and this also happens with the Tall Ones since they are pretty much made up of moon-like qualities
"Selene, the moon, is associated with the art of Clio, the muse of history and historical writing. The moon is the planet that moves the tides of life, the tides of the ocean, and the tides of the menstrual cycle and is consequently the power that informs history. The arrow held by Selene in the sphere of the moon is held down, pointing us to the Earth and its history[...]"
the moon in the pathless takes a more human scale - it's gentler, but still conscious of the natural cycle, a natural path that repeats itself over and over and over again
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for me it seems that Godslayer pursued the sword (and therefore the sun) as a form of bringing himself closer to the position of a god above the gods; the moon represented exactly what he rejects, the pathless land
hence Hunter's affinity with the moon, and its image ever so present in her presence - she's the moon that dies and resurrects, moving like the river among the realm of the humans
Godslayer in the end would never choose the moon, or the bow, cause he had only one objective
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but here comes a small surprise: both the bow and the sword are described as sisters
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sun and moon are both female symbols, and are sisters (a bit like Apolo and Artemis), and even if Godslayer denies, they come from a single origin, a single truth
in the end, he also abandons his sword, cause she is unfit, tainted
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romeoeatzkorn · 1 year
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Introduction
Hey! I haven’t done a proper introduction soo here we are
Basic info
Name: Roxx
Age: 14
Gender: Genderfluid Nonbinary
Pronouns: They/it (my persona uses He/Him)
Sexuality: Butch Lesbian
Nationality (and ethnicity): Canadian, Scandinavian + Plains Cree
Realationship: QP w/@rainbowfriendsfanatic
Funfacts about me!!! I kin Roxie Richter
I kin Queen Barb
I make a lot of sex jokes (puberty is a bitch)
Please use tone tags when talking to me
I’m a Aquarius I use the term faggot and dyke a lot (I am queer)
I am Butch
Rare-pairs are my passion
I would like to go on T (Testosterone) one day
Sometimes I feel like a fem queen ❤️❤️
If ur my moot I’m gunna call u pookie
My other socials
Basic DNI:
Pro/comshippers
Facists and Homophobes
Kink blogs (y’all cool I guess but still I’m under the age of consent)
Full on porn blogs fuck off
Wallycest/Applecest
Individual DNI
18+ accs (nsfw or kink shit)
Wallaby/Barnly antis please block me so you don’t have to see my content
“Male” lesbians FUCK RIGHT OFF NOW
Transphobes feel like this one’s self explanatory
Gold star lesbians
Christans (love y’all just pls)
Asexual and Aromantic deniers
Racists.
Cishets love you guys just this blog is for the gays
Julie x Wally shippers (simply dislike the ship nothing against y’all)
Fujoshis y’all gross me out
Do interact
Lesbians pls
LGBTQ2SA+
Neurodivergent people
People underneath the Trans umbrella
Wallaby/Barnly fans
Cringe people
Other minors
Fellow Sapphics and NMLNM
Barnaby enjoyers
Poppy kissers
Jewish people y’all are safe here ♥️
Neo pronoun users
Trans trenders (people who identify with a gender under the trans umbrella but don’t feel gender dysphoria)
Neo gender users
Therians and furrys ♥️ I love you guys y’all are cool asf
Beginner artists
Two spirit lesbians
Trans woman Howdy truthers (I’ll die on this fucking hill I swear)
butch lesbian enjoyers
butch4femme enthusiasts
Huntlow enthusiasts
Roxie richter fans!!
Platonic Julie and Wally fans
Fandoms Im in
Romeo + Juliet (1996)
scott pilgrim (SPTO specifically)
Welcome home
The owl house (I’m only here for huntlow and Eda)
One piece
Strange Hill High
Tf2
DHMIS
Spiderverse
Warrior cats
RTC (Ride the cylcone)
Trolls (I am cringe but I’m free)
Music and Artists I enjoy
Rio Romeo
Cosmo sheldrake
Felix Colgrave
Sparkbird
ICP
Sodikken
sorry mom
Mitski
MSI (I don’t support the lead singer)
The crane wives
Sufjan Stevens
Megan Nash
The oozes
Hoizer
Will Wood
@winslow-arts
Myself
All of my moots
Dana Terrace
Ships I rly rly like
Wallaby (obvi)
Roxie x Kim (SPTO)
Ragatha x Pomni
Howdy x Poppy aka Powdy (trans fem howdy bb)
Frank x Eddie
Josuyasu (I love these dumbasses)
Julie x Sally
Huntlow (they have consumed my mind)
Barnaby x Wally x Frank x Eddie
Barb x Poppy (theyre so yuriful)
Tybalt x Romeo (doomed yaoi my fave)
Viva x Clay (I don’t ship broppy)
Branch x king trollex
More to come
Boundaries
I am comfortable with:
KYS jokes if we’re moots
Calling the characters I draw stinky as a joke
Suggestive and gore content of my AUs/Characters (u can tag me if u want idgaf)
NSFW content being created of the Trad Goth Wally AU same thing with the thriller AU (do not tag me)
Fics of my characters and AUs that have sexual elements (do tag me in fics but add a warning if it is suggestive or has sexual elements)
I am not comfortable with:
Being referred to w/ primarily She/Her pronouns
Calling the characters I draw sexy or sexualizing them
People DMing me (unless they are my moot or it’s for comms)
NSFW asks
Flirting w/me (unless I know you irl or we’re moots or you’re butch 😍😍)
Bye! Please be kind!
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