#only in my lucid dreams

[crescent-yoon]

I finally uploaded Chapter 6 of oimld 😅 sorry for such a long wait everyone and thank you for being so patient!

[crescent-yoon]

only in my lucid dreams

part 5

"i don't believe you." the driver scoffed as he turned around in his seat to face me. "you really expect us to believe that you don't know where your mother or the money is? then how is it that you afford to go to Saebom High School in that uniform of yours, huh?"

i could hear the impatience in his voice as it was slowly but surely escalating.

"i can't help but say it again but i don't know where my mother put or has possibly spent that money and all i know is that she's not here in Korea."

"just tell us where she is!!" the man in the passenger's seat yelled, causing me to put my hands up to my ears in shock.

"i don't know!! i'm sorry, but i don't know!"

how did i manage to find myself in this situation?

as i thought this to myself, the man in the passenger's seat turned around with something shiny glistening in his hand as the drive kept his eyes on the road. it was a gun.

and just as the gun had cocked, i had woken up.

Seojun pov

Y/N and i were walking home from school as the day was already done with. Gowoon and i were discussing what we should eat for dinner as y/n was lost in thought. we thought of turning to you to settle our argument, i turned and saw that you were gone.

i turned and looked around only to find two men dragging you into a dark looking van and before i knew it, i was yelling at Gowoon to run home and i began to chasing the car.

i felt myself getting farther and farther away from you before i felt myself waking up.

i arose from my bed, sweat matting my hair as i turned to my bedside table to glance at the time.

3 am. thank god, that it was only a dream. but.. what if it does happen?

needing to calm my racing heart, i walked into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water. all my thoughts were racing in my mind and a moments later, there you were. you were walking out of Gowoon's room and into the kitchen. something in you, it seemed like there was fear and there was sadness.

i guess that you hadn't even noticed me because you had bumped directly into my chest, causing me to grab the small of your back and forget that i had that glass in my hand.

"oh! i'm sorry!" your eyes had widened as you began picking up the glass. taking a second to realize what had just happened, i hadn't realized that you had cut yourself on accident because you weren't being careful.

i bent down on your level, gently reaching for the hand you had cut on the glass and took the pieces of the shattered cup you'd collected out of your hand.

"don't worry about it." i softly spoke, glancing between your puppy eyes and bleeding hand. "i'll clean it up. you just go in my room and wait on the bed."

after receiving a soft nod from you in response, i watched you walk into my room and xlose the door.

i let out a soft sigh.

at least you were okay for now.

i grabbed the broom and cleaned up the glass shards from the floor. after i was done, i grabbed the band-aids, ointment, q-tips, and the rubbing alcohol from the hall bathroom and entered my room to see you glancing at your hand.

were you lost in thought or were you just waiting patiently for me? i wondered what went on in your brain at times.

you slowly looked up at me as i walked closer to you and grabbed the hand of yours that wasn't injured.

i walked you into the bathroom in my room and sat you on the toilet as i set the items on the counter.

i grabbed a rag from a shelf in my bathroom and wet it in the sink. then, i gently grabbed your injured hand and began wiping of the blood. you sat there silently as i did so and i wondered if your hands were always this small compared to mine.

"what are you thinking about?" i asked, partially to distract you from the fact that i was about to use the rubbing alcohol and partially because i was curious.

"just.. a nightmare." you looked down, eyes avoiding mine as you winced time to time from the rubbing alcohol.

"a nightmare?" i placed the ointment on your hand and carefully placed the bandage. did you dream the same thing as me?

"mm." you looked at me again as i finally released your hand. "i don't think that i could sleep again after that."

i looked at you as i grabbed your hand once again and walked into my room.

"here." i nodded towards my bed as i gently laid you down under the covers. "you can sleep here for the night and i'll watch over you."

"i can't take your bed." you began to sit up before i pushed you back down onto it.

"just rest." i nodded again before grabbing your okay hand while i sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing circles with my thumb on the back of your hand until you had fallen asleep.

i turned and looked at the clock. 3:30. when i was sure that you were asleep, i quietly tried to remove my hand from yours to go sleep on the couch. as i tried to let go of your hand, you held on tighter.

"stay here, Seojun." you mumbled, i was unsure if you were sleep talking or if you hadn't actually fallen asleep.

"okay." i whispered as i lay on the other side of the bed, drifting off to sleep as i kept your hand in mine.

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i had woken up to the sound of flashing. i had slowly blinked my eyes and saw that you and i were closer than we were when we had fallen asleep. my arm was wrapped around your shoulders as your head had rested on mine. our hands still remained intertwined. your eyes were closed, seemingly content. it was clear that you weren't the source of the flashing. i turned around to look towards the door and sure enough, Gowoon was there as the source of the flashing, taking pictures of us sleeping.

"i was wondering where she went." she smiled as she kept taking pictures. "you two would make a good couple."

"delete it." i groaned, loud enough for Gowoon to hear but not enough to wake you up.

"later." she smiled as she left my room and i knew that she wouldn't but i didn't have the energy for this.

i looked at the clock and saw that it was time for us to start getting ready for school anyways.

"Y/n?" I spoke, voice laced with sleepiness.

i received a "hm?" and you wrapped your arms around the back of my neck, causing me to accidentally move closer and our lips to be too close to touching.

"school! we have school." i yelled out in panic as i had woken you up.

you sat up and looked at my alarm clock. you scratched the back of your neck before mumbling a soft, "i see." and leaving the room to get ready.

as you left to get ready, i wondered if your heart raced as much as mine did.

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Y/n pov

the school day was strange. it began with Gowoon, Seojun, and i walking to school and the whole time we were walking, Seojun kept glancing around us like he was paranoid of something.

Gowoon had even asked him if he was okay and he insisted he was as he kept glancing around suspectingly.

then at lunch, he made Sujin get up from beside me so that he can sit there.

i asked if you were okay but you insisted that you were and wrapped an arm around my shoulders as you continued to glance around.

it really worried me because you didn't eat anything and seemed like you were scared of something. you had made my heart race in concern but also because of the moment you wrapped an arm around me.

what were you so afraid of?

you had even walked me to every class and if you couldn't do that or you were busy with something, you had your friends do it which left me scared that you were doing something bad or were in danger.

i even tried to ditch your friends and go to gym class by myself but instead you even scolded me.

Gowoon had to stay for choir practice so it was just the two of us walking together and again you looked paranoid and it began to annoy me.

"Han Seojun!" i stopped walking and looked at you with annoyance written in my face. "what is wrong with you? all day, you've been looking around like someone is out to get you."

"i'm sorry." you said as you rested your hands on my shoulders and looked me in the eyes. "i'm just a bit worried that something bad might happen today. especially to you."

"oh." i said, unsure of what exactly to say to your honesty. "well, i'm okay right now, right?"

it was a statement that was half true. when you had spoken what was truly on your mind, my heart had raced the same way it had earlier.

did yours ever beat like this around me, too?

"i guess you are." you smiled back but i could tell that it was still an unsure one as i grabbed your hand. "so what should we eat today?"

i laughed at the question as we continued walking, thinking of all the things we could eat today as we playfully pushed each other and cracked jokes along the way.

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5 part 6

[crescent-yoon]

only in my lucid dreams

Part 4

"so why are we here, Seojun?" you had asked, you had been looking in every direction except for mine. were you uncomfortable? i wanted to look at your eyes. i wanted to look at those gleaming eyes whose gaze had looked so delicate in contrast to my own.

"you can't exactly go home." i scratched the back of my head bashfully, nervous of what was the best thing to say. "there's a lot of debt sharks at your house."

"my house?" i was semi-new to this school. remembering this made me realize that i probably sounded more suspicious than intended but you seemed to dismiss it.

"you should probably stay here for a while." i looked at the ground, not sure if it's comfort you or create an awkward atmosphere. "it's probably the best choice for you since i... i don't really trust that you'll be safe alone."

alone. something about that word seemed to trigger something within you and those puppy dog eyes.

maybe i had accidentally touched a nerve.

you had been so lost in thought that you hadn't even noticed when your phone had began to rang. i snapped in your face to but it hadn't seemed to do anything, until i tapped the underneath of your chin.

"earth to Y/n."

the familiarity brought me warmth and comfort.

"your phone, it's ringing." i tapped on your phone screen once i had gained your attention.

i had listened to the call as you had put it on speaker and the conversation felt awfully awkward.

anyone could immediately tell that you and your mother weren't close. if anyone had heard or seen you two interact, i'm sure that they would've thought that the two of you were co-workers or some sort with the cold environment.

it was if you had remembered that we had been sitting in silence when i had decided to break it. "it's okay if you stay here. i'd rather you be safe than in danger. you can sleep in Gowoon's room and as far as clothes, i'm sure she wouldn't mind you borrowing some of hers."

"thank you." you smiled graciously at me before comfortable silence had filled the room. it stayed like that for a moment before an obnoxious rumbling noise was heard.

"was- that your stomach?" i stared at you, eyes wide from the shock of the loudness.

"ah, no." you quickly said, shy and full of embarrassment. "it must've come from outside somewhere."

liar. why can't you just admit that you were hungry?

we both sat there in embarrassing silence before the rumbling was heard once again.

"ah, well." you looked in a random corner of the room, embarrassed causing me to chuckle a bit.

"come on." i smiled, grabbing another jacket seeing as how you were still wearing mine from earlier. "let's go eat somewhere."

we left the house and i couldn't help but hold your hand as you walked alongside him. you looked at me when i did so and i couldn't help the embarrassment and hesitation that had shown on my face.

"it's cold out, that's why i had reached for your hand." i said as i released your hand from mine. "i can let go if you'd like."

"no, it's really okay," you smiled as you held onto my hand once again. "it's warm. besides, we're friends now aren't we?"

"i suppose we are, huh?" i smiled back as we continued the walk for food in silence.

the silence was unbelievably comforting. the feel of her hand in mine was unbelievably warm. this moment had felt unbelievably...

real.

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"you can't really handle spicy food can you?" you laughed as i was trying to keep my cool despite my mouth burning.

"what do you mean?" i raised my eyebrows at you with a slight lift of my head. "of course i can."

this only made you laugh at me more.

"you're such a bad liar, Seojun. i can see the sweat forming on your forehead."

"i don't know what you're talking about." i crossed my arms as i tried to put on a cool front.

"you're so stubborn, Seojun." you shook your head with a smile as you switched our meals around. "you don't have to act cool in front of me."

to be honest, it caught me slightly off guard.

i mean, i didn't even know that you could handle spicy food and the fact that you switched your non-spicy food with my spicy one, made me feel... warm inside.

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"thank you for the food, Seojun." you smiled, swinging our hands back and forth.

"i was hungry, too." i looked away, knowing that i was blushing. "it was no problem."

i kept glancing between our intertwined hands and the smile on your face when i saw it light up even more before you excitedly tugged my hands in a direction full of light.

"can we look around ?" you looked at me with a pleading smile. it was like looking at a puppy or a little kid with a look that gave you the impression that you couldn't say no.

"wow. isn't it pretty, Seojun?" you gasped, it was full of surprise and wonder, causing me to look up away from you.

the garden of morning calm lighting festival? had you never seen it before?

"one hour. we have school tomorrow." i sighed, once again trying to play it off coolly but it only made your smile grow bigger as you saw through my disguise.

even though there were so many things, so many lights to look at, my gaze remained only on you. seeing all your reactions, emotions, and just observing the little things you do.

your creasing eyebrows when you were overly concentrated on something, your puppy like face when you were confused, and the crease of your eyes when you smiled.

i observed it all and kept it in mind as my own smile began to show.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

[crescent-yoon]

Hey, everyone. I have some things going on at home so tonight's episode of only in my lucid dreams will be up either Friday or Saturday at 11PM MST ♡

[crescent-yoon]

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[crescent-yoon]

What do you guys think of "only in my lucid dreams so far? Whether it be your thoughts (or questions on part 2 or yesterday's upload?

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only in my lucid dreams

Part 3

★ Seojun's POV ★

all i could hear beneath my feet was the crunching of snow. it snowed heavily the previous night, making it difficult for me if i had chosen to ride my bike. i was finally coming back to this school after so long and i was nervous. nervous to see you outside of these dreams.

your eyes were just as i had seen them every night - dim yet warm and full of life - as you had set your eyes on me with that brightness that was only shown to me. your hair down and eyes full of wonder as always. when i saw you in these dreams, you had always looked as beautiful as ever. even if you were just simply wearing a pair of ripped jeans and an oversized hoodie. ever so rarely wearing something out of the ordinary for you.

even last night you had worn the clothes that seemed to give you the most comfort, while i had wanted so desperately to show you my uniform. the colors that should've been recognizable to both you and i, sparking your curiosity. sparking that wonder in your eyes.

"why are you wearing that?" you asked as curiosity had played on your face. "it's... a bit different from your usual attire, Seojun."

i couldn't help but to mentally adore how that expression made you look so.. cute.

"yes, well, my mom is a bit sick so my sister and i need to switch schools." i tilted my head to the side just a bit, hoping to give off the cockiest of smirks only for a mix of sincerity and playfulness to show in my expression. "why? are you happy that we're going to the same school, Y/n?"

"so happy i could have a heart attack right now from the overwhelming joy that i'm feeling right now?" you playfully rolled your eyes at me as i gave you a light shove in response, just as we had always done whenever we were enjoying each other's company.

"yeah, yeah. no need to go overboard." i laughed as i took your hand into my own. your hand was cold yet comforting at the same time. it had always been this way as i had kept my thoughts, wondering if you had seen me as a man. "besides, i used to attend this school but things got crazy in my life so i had to move away."

"makes sense, i suppose." everytime you always had little to say, but you never strayed away from me. you did zone out constantly and always made me wonder about the gears turning in your head.

"i know that it's a bit strange but.. do you see me as a man or just a figment of your imagination?" i had asked, truly curious. unfortunately for me, you were so zoned out that you hadn't heard a single word.

"earth to Y/n?" i playfully and softly tapped the bottom of your chin to gain your attention as i had always done. "clearly you weren't listening but i asked you if you-"

you disappeared as i was going to ask again and that had only meant that you had woken up. i was going to get ready for the day too when another dream had started.

i saw you in our school uniform, presumably on your way home after school. you were walking alone unsuspectingly when two huge men had grabbed ahold of you and tried to shove you into a dark looking van. i couldn't hear anything in this dream but one of the guys lips had read, "whether we have to threaten her or threaten you, your mother owes us money and we'll just keep hold of you until she finally pays up."

immediately without hesitation, i felt my feet running. of course i'd run to you. i had to save you. but just as i got close, the ringing of my alarm clock had sounded and i had to get ready for school, that dream set in my mind.

the sight, the feeling, the sounds. all of it felt unbelievably... real.

snapping out of my thoughts, i had walked past the snow covered trees towards the school gates. until i had seen... you. i'm glad that you were still okay which had only meant the event was something that would happen in the future, keeping this in mind, i would discreetly keep an eye on you. even as i remembered the dream before that.

the feel of your hand in mine, the racing of my heart, the curiosity on your face. every bit of it felt so surreal. why is it you, y/n? why do you keep appearing in my dreams like this? at first... at first i thought that you were only meant to be a figment of my imagination. someone that i had made up in spite of my loneliness.

but then the dreams had kept occurring and it all felt too real. especially when i had seen you in real life, in the real world. you hadn't noticed me as you had that zoned expression on your face, unaware that you had brushed my shoulder. that familiar warm, tingly sensation had been felt all over my body. it was really you. and i knew your weren't my imagination when i had heard you lost in thought mumbling the words of "who are you" and "why are we connected, han seojun?".

even now, you looked exactly like you did in my dreams. there was no way that this could all just be... an eery coincidence. but when our eyes met, i knew. i knew that we were connected somehow.

should i approach you? no, i'd look strange. should i pretend as if i had never seen you before? but i had seen you before, in person and in my dreams.

then i had noticed it.

i noticed that unlike me, you weren't wearing a winter coat, though the snow continued to gently land on your eyelashes and melt on your cheeks and nose, a slight shiver coming over your body.

those same warm eyes, they were filled with familiarity and they made me wonder. do you recognize me? you seemed to.

i was going to muster up the courage to approach you until a friend had dragged me away with the ring of the bell.

snapping out of my thoughts and out of the cold weather, i'd been dragged to 2b and there our gazes met again.

i don't know what you were doing but suddenly i had seen you put your hands to the temples of your forehead. at first i had thought you had gotten a headache until i realized. you were concentrating really hard on something. i realized that you're acting just as i did when i realized you were real, probably thinking you had some sort of super power and that thought was so funny that it had me holding back laughter.

"um.. are you okay, y/n?" Suho had asked you as Jugyeong felt your forehead to check your temperature. Their concern had made it even harder to hold back my laughter.

"ahaha, yes, well." you had looked down until you had turned around and saw me laughing.

"so weird." i shook my head, genuinely trying to stop laughing but you looked so much like a confused puppy that it was hard to stop. "what are you even doing, Y/n?"

"huh?" your head tilted in confusion. "how do you-"

i hadn't even realized that i had let your name slip from my mouth. of course i shouldn't have been able to know your name without ever truly meeting you, right? trying to find my way out of the situation, i had remembered that every student had to wear a plated name tag on their shirt.

"nametag." i pointed at the silver plated pin on your jacket. creating a quiet atmosphere before looking out into the hallway from the classroom window with a clearing of my throat.

suddenly i had felt a hard pinch on the back of my neck and it hurt badly. it was almost as if you were trying to make sure i was real. i wanted to ask you why you did that in a calm manner but it had hurt so bad that i had scolded you with a stern and slightly raised voice saying, "why? what do you want so bad that you have to pinch me on my neck like that?"

not realizing a had lowered the volume of our chattering classmates, their eyes all turned in our direction. you very quietly and quickly apologized as you headed back to your seat. i has realized that i had probably embarrassed you. i wanted to apologize but before i could, our teacher had walked in and began class. even with the teacher starting class, my eyes only lingered on you.

the day had been over with and as the students began piling out of the building, i noticed that the snowfall had gotten worse and thought about how you hadn't worn a jacket to school today. amongst all my thoughts, i had also remembered that dream. the one where you had been in danger and i don't think that i could've allowed you to walk home. especially because you had told me once in a dream that you had lived alone.

when you had began taking a step forward, i decided to stop you and had pulled you into my chest.

"Han Seojun?" you looked up in surprise at me, those sparkling eyes staring at me once again. "what's wrong?"

"i know it's a bit weird of me to request something of you when we just met but i need you to trust me." i frowned, taking off my jacket and wrapping it around you seeing as that i couldn't stand to see you cold, teeth slightly chattering. "don't go home today. i need you to come with me."

i didn't really expect you to go with me. after all, you only knew me inside of these dreams we shared. who were you to trust a stranger. but then i saw this determined nod you gave and i felt my heart racing as you had told me-

"i trust you"

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

[crescent-yoon]

oimld update 2

Hey, everyone. I'm not feeling all too great emotionally and mentally (and slightly physically) at the moment. And I don't think I will be for a while. This may affect the uploading schedule of oimld just a bit. I'll still continue to work on the story of course, but just please understand if future parts get uploaded a bit late though I'll try my best to upload them on time first.

This week's post will be up tomorrow as scheduled. This post is also to serve as a reminder that the upload time of oimld has changed to Wednesdays at 11 PM MST (timing may very depending on your location). If you don't go by MST just base it on your time zone.

Thank you

- 🐰💞

[crescent-yoon]

What are your guys' thoughts on "oimld" so far?? I'm curious ☺!! What do you think?

- 🐰💞

[crescent-yoon]

OIMLD pt. 2 update

"only in my lucid dreams" pt. 2 will be out at 11am MST today as scheduled. Please keep in mind that starting next week (March 10th, 2021), oimld will be posted on Wednesdays at 11 PM MST due to school because this is most convenient for me and feel as though the series will be more comforting to read at nighttime. I'll be posting it at 11 PM MST (my time zone) unless you guys can recommend more of a convenient time (at night during my time) to post the chapters. Let me know if the time frame that I've chosen is inconvenient (recommend a better posting time) or if this time frame works for you and please enjoy today's chapter of oimld later on and let me know what you think!!

- 🐰💞

[crescent-yoon]

OIMLD (update)

I'm working on the update for "only in my lucid dreams" and my computer had died during the writing process and i now have to restart all my writing for part 2. it will still be up at the scheduled time (Wednesday, 11 am MST) but it might not be up to expectations or as good as the draft that i had previously written but OIMLD (only in my lucid dreams) will be posted as schedule.