#one on right is chip ! do NOT call him a shrimp he is a king prawn. prawnling

[demento]

spits my splatoon ocs at you

[afterartist]

Have a headcannon dump of a LU!centaur Au that’s been cycling in my brain for a week, I’m quite possibly going to write a fic/do more art,

You’re free to leave ideas or suggestions for this Au as well

(Wild doodle to go with at the end)

•–•Au Basics:

-this is heavily based off the @linkeduniverse Au by @jojo56830

Basically it’s the same but every character (even side characters but they’re not important) are Centaurian, this is finicky and involves things like Cervitaurs, mermaids and whatnot,

This is hevily based on living conditions and most races are born with natural legs, ie; hylians are born with two hylian legs, and their secondary legs will grow in around the age of four depending on the food and lifestyle they’ve had until then, the secondary traits are usually set in by the age of six where they will no longer have their original legs.

—-

Now the headcannons (this is just the links cause idk much about the Zelda’s so I have to do more research)

—-

•–Time•

- The old man is a Stag, no I will not take criticism on this

Time started off his journey a young deer cervitaur, barely grown into his fawn limbs before coming into contact with Fi,

Deer are often seen as prey animals and weak, but we all know Time is seen as the leader for a reason,

My man got mad strong horns and has kicked, impaled and stomped on more Moblins then any sane person should, while deers are often seen as weak you would have to be blind, deaf, three years old and an idiot to think Time any less then the powerful stag that would lay his life down for his family

-

•–Sky•

-Loftwing… kind of a no brainer for this one

Oh yeah, our sleepy king has butt wings and you can’t stop me,

Sky was literally found in a Loftwing nest and the majority of Skyloft secretly think he’s a Hylian Centaur instead of the other way around,

Learning to fly was the literal worst, his wings took a few more years to fully develop so he got to flying later then most, the fact that his wings sit at an awkward place on the base between his hylian torso and his Skywing back doesn’t help that fact

Yes he’s still perfected the art of flying while asleep, not even other Loftwing hybrids know how he does it

-

•–Twilight •

-He’s… hes a Wolf… it’s… it’s twilight… literally what else would he be?

He was actually a wolf hybrid before his adventure started and is honestly not sure how it took so long for the chain to even start to theorise his connections with Wolfie,

Wind guessed they were long lost brothers,

Fun fact, Twi is allergic to fur, it took him embracingly long to realise, ‘Oh, I thought the air was just meant to hurt’

Legend likes to call him a husky and watch as Twi goes on a rant about how they are completely different, this went on for months before time brought a stop to it

-

•-Legend•

-Pegasus… is this because I love the Pegasus boots? You’ll never know

The only reason sky knows how to preen his wings is because legend literally sat on him one day and showed him

In the ‘Not quite horse centaurs’ club with Wild

His tail was unfortunately docked in his third adventure, Wind used his ‘ Customary Pirate Rope tying skills’ to fashion him a fake tail out of foe hair (yes it’s pink) and braided him a new tail,

Legend won’t admit but that was the day he started trusting the rest of the chain

Likes to cuff Wars over the head with his wings, he quickly found out Wars’ wings hurt a lot more to get hit by then his

-

•–Warriors•

-DragonDragonDRAGONDRA-

His scales are literally brighter then the chains future (admittedly not hard to be)

Learned the hard way that his claws are sharp and for completely non related reasons has a wooden backscratcher he won’t tell anyone about

Runs hotter then the others Links, thus why he always wears his scarf, Legend jokes he’s as cold blooded as his blood,

legend regrets.

Has an unhealthy obsession with shiny things, his time in the army has helped him restrain from stealing freshly polished swords and amour but four swears they had a freshly cleaned dagger right next to them and now it’s gone-

-

•–Four•

-Minish?? More like biggish (that was bad I’ll see myself out-)

Still Has four legs like a mouse instead of the two that minish usually have, but has the fluffiest tail in existence

Actually wasn’t sure what Minish were before meeting them so was super confused for the first few years after developing

When Wind was confused on how to use their pronouns (they/them) correctly they told him to just picture four mice in a Trenchcoat (it helped Wind a lot)

Paints their claws/nails, each foot is one of the four colours, the blue nails are for some reason always somehow chipped, Warriors ends up lending them some of his nail Polish which is sturdier

-

•–Hyrule•

-obsessing over the idea that Rules’ Hyrule is basically Australia so Rule is a kangaroo

Kangaroos are evil deer, Rule is the exception

Kangaroos are terrifying and could be hit by a truck and walk it off, lest to say Time had a mini breakdown after watching Hyrule get punched into a tree by a Hinox, stand up, then carry on with his life without so much as a scratch

They still suck at cooking

If you say ‘shrimp on a campfire’ he will ring your throat until you meet Nayru face to face,

‘I may not know how to cook but I know they’re called prawns.’

-

•–Wind•

-Salt water croc for my salty pirate

Changed from lobster because I personally hate lobsters

Has claws and knows how to use them, preferably on the back of legend’s legs but has learned hooves hurt to take to the face

Has 3rd eyelid to be able to see underwater, so he likes to sleep like that sometimes and creep out whoever is on watch

Wild has attempted to eat him at least twice, both times Twi had to stop the because Wind was also curious

Sky only has two legs? Boo loser, Wind has 4 and a big tail that could snap your spine (it took wind several years to learn how not to trip over and he still can’t walk for long periods of time)

-

•–Wild-

-Lynel… Time is not surprised

In the ‘Not quite horse centaurs’ club with Legend

Honestly thought he was a horse until Flora mentioned ‘no Link, horse’s don’t grow horns out of their head’

Isn’t sure if he’s a gold Lynel or just blond (they’re just blond)

Also has a hint of orange in his blue eyes, eyes that glow red on bloodmoons

Unlike their hair they actually like to style their tail a lot, went they went to Gerudo town he was taught how to braid and bun it but can’t do it on his own so let’s Wind do it when he’s bored

Has small horns that Time had to teach him how to take care of, cause who knew horns need maintenance

Literally no one knows how his glider is able to hold him up… or how he climbs literally anything with ease even with his equestrian limbs

Was also one of the first to use Four’s pronouns correctly as they themselves use all pronouns (likes he/they the most tho)

—- Quick sketch of Wild cause I love them with all my heart

Anyway, it’s just a poorly thought out Au and I’ll probably work on it more but have this info dump for a second as I try to figure out what I’m doing with my life,

If y’all have any suggestions have at it,

I just hope my ideas aren’t as jumbled as I think they are

[kanonsarchivedblog]

Heat Waves Been Fakin’ Me Out-

(Can’t make you happier now). ━━━━━━━━━━━━ Word Count: 1679 TW: Anxiety Attack Author's Notes: This was inspired by that trend on TikTok when people reminisce to the chorus of Heat Waves by Glass Animals, and I realized that wow, this trend really fits Kisuke and the massive guilt he has. Let's exploit that. ━━━━━━━━━━━━ The sweltering summer heat settled across the city of Karakura, making it’s citizens suffer from the moment they opened their doors to leave their houses to the moment they reached their (hopefully air conditioned) location. Children played in the splash pads or in public swimming pools, dipping their feet in the rivers and streams, or crunched happily on flavored shaved ice. Anything to beat the heat, realistically.

Sweat slowly trailed down between tense shoulder blades as Kisuke listened to Rojuro sing along to the radio. The shop did have central air, thankfully, but even that didn’t seem to give a blessed respite from the heat that rolled in through the door every time it opened. He never had been good at handling the heat; had always suffered in the summers of Soul Society when he’d been young. Yoruichi used to tease him about it, despite being just as miserable at the time.

Thankfully, as the sun began to dip below the horizon, the heat began to lift and a sweet summer breeze danced through the air. It was then that they were able to function as Tessai and Kensei worked on dinner. It was weekly, this little get-together, planned carefully to avoid detection or an accidental brush with someone from Soul Society- or someone with stolen powers and a horrible case of hero syndrome.

“Ne, Shin- hand me that cup, would you?” HIyori asked, not bothering to sit up from her sprawled position on the tatami. Kisuke couldn’t blame her- she suffered almost as badly as he did.

“Get it yerself,” Shinji stated even as he reached over, taking hold of the cup before handing it off to the other. She hummed her thanks and placed the bottom of the cup on her forehead, sighing at the feeling of the cool perspiration settling on her skin. Lisa let out a snort at the sight as she reached into her own cup, plucking out an ice chip to pop into her mouth. A moment later, she crunched down on it.

“That means you have an iron deficiency,” Hachi commented as he fanned himself, eyes closed. “Perhaps you should purchase some supplemental tablets.”

“Maybe,” Lisa murmured, gaze not lifting from the book she was engrossed in. “Or maybe I just like the way it feels when I bite down.”

“You always did like biting,” Rose mused with a smile as he brought in a fresh tray of drinks. “I remember watching you fight- you almost took a chunk out of Kyoraku-taichou.”

“I wonder if he scarred?” Mashiro questioned, her gaze darting about the room.

“Probably,” Kisuke hummed, grimacing at the way his haori clung to his skin. Gross. Even so, his mind began to drift. This was nice- seeing them all together, no one really arguing- hearing the laughter drift from the kitchen as Tessai tried to do an onion volcano, only for it to fail in a tiny puff of smoke. Love had settled in a chair, his feet propped up on Hachi’s leg, while Lisa leaned against the leg of the table. Hiyori lay away from them, trying to stay as still as possible to avoid any unnecessary movement. Mashiro wasn’t bothered- but she never had been bothered by the heat, especially not now. Yoruichi laid on the front porch, for once not in her feline form, enjoying the cool northern breeze.

Shinji was watching him, Kisuke noted belatedly- his brow raised, a question posed within his gaze but not spoken aloud. He waved him off idly, a lazy smile curling his lips but coming nowhere near his eyes. His head dipped, the brim of his hat settling low over his eyes.

This was how it used to be. Kensei and Tessai would work together in the kitchen with Mashiro “helping”- more often than not, they’d all gather in the Twelfth. It had the most room back then. Shinji would sit with him and Yoruichi, sharing in any news he’d heard recently; Lisa would arrive later, having been with her Captain, even if she denied it. Hachi would bring sweets that he graciously picked up from the Western Rukongai, and Hiyori would bring drinks-

Along with Aizen.

The mere thought was enough to cause a weight to settle in Kisuke’s stomach like a stone tossed into a shallow pond suddenly. The waves rippled throughout, sending out spikes of anxiety and guilt that settled in the palms of his hands and the back of his mind. His heart skipped a beat.

Silently, he rose to his feet and slipped away into the depths of the Shoten. The weight was back, settling across his shoulders, draping itself across him as if it were a thick blanket, suffocating him. His breath began to come quicker, his heart beginning to race in his chest, causing his palms to sweat. He almost stumbled when grabbing the handle for his bedroom, all but shoving himself inside before carefully, quietly, closing the door.

Breathe.

This was familiar, the anxiety. It happened more often than he’d like to admit. But by the Soul King, he couldn’t breathe. It felt like hands had wrapped around his throat and were squeezing, cutting off his air supply. His eyes closed, and all he could see was chestnut brown hair, a smile that was nothing more than a facade, and dark brown eyes. A gasp escaped him as he opened his eyes-

And found himself alone.

Alone.

Outside, they all sat. His friends. But this wasn’t where they belonged. They belonged back home, back in Soul Society, but that could never happen. Not with how they would be killed on sight if ever seen. How he himself had a kill order placed upon his head for a crime he didn’t commit.

But it was his fault, wasn’t it? All of this was his fault. His fault for bringing up the question of what would happen if a Shinigami became a Hollow. His fault for beginning research- he wanted to know what Hollows were like. He didn’t want to experiment. But he’d planted the seed, and unintentionally, watered it, causing it to grow into the beautiful flower it had become.

It was his fault Aizen started his experiments, he was certain of it. How else could it be explained? Why else would Aizen target Shinji? Target any of them? It was his fault, and then he’d been too fucking late to save them.

He should have been the one. He should have been the one who became Aizen’s experiment. It was his fault. His fault they had all essentially been killed, his fault they all now suffered with the Hollows that took up residence within their minds and bodies, his fault that they were no longer seen as Shinigami. His fault.

His fault.

All his fault.

His breaths came in choked sobs as he sank to his knees, reaching up to clutch at his chest. Calm down, Kisuke, calm down. Your reiatsu will spike if you don’t- the voice was soft, a croon in his ear. Benihime, his benevolent princess.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

He swallowed roughly as he forced himself to calm down. He couldn’t afford to break- no, he needed to stay strong. He had to stay strong, stay sharp, stay ahead of the game. If he slips up, they could all die. He can’t do that. He already fucked their lives up once. He can’t let that happen again. Not again.

They can never return to what they once were- and it was his fault for that.

“Kisuke?” Shinji called softly, knuckles rapping on the wood of the shoji. “You okay?”

“Fine,” Kisuke croaked, grimacing at himself for how awful he sounded. “Just got- choked. ‘M fine!”

A sigh settled in the air as Shinji opened the door, stepped in, and closed it. “You’ve always been a shitty liar,” he murmured as he came over, settling down beside Kisuke. “What’s gotten into you, huh?” Voice soft as he questioned the other. Carefully, he reached up, brushing the remnants of tears away from flushed cheeks. “You look so broken when you cry.”

“Just the… Damn heat wave,” the excuse was weak. “I’m fine.”

Shinji didn’t respond; instead, he reached over to tug the other blond close, arms wrapping around him. “Damn cry baby,” he muttered as Kisuke laughed in a broken sort of way- almost bordering on a sob as he settled into his arms.

“Just the heat.”

“Sure it is.”

Kisuke fell silent, listening to the slow beat of Shinji’s heart. Alive, somewhat. He still wasn’t completely sure how it worked, the hollowfication. The impact it had on the body. Rose’s heart barely beat, while Mashiro’s sounded like a hummingbird’s. Strange.

“I miss it, too,” Shinji admitted after a moment. “We all do.”

“I know.”

“It’s not yer fault.”

“Right.” Liar, his mind whispered. He pulled away carefully, wiping at his face. A shower would be nice, but dinner came first. “Let's go eat,” he rose to his feet, holding a hand out for Shinji, who took it and let Kisuke pull him up.

“Kisuke?” Shinji called as the former captain made his way to the door. Kisuke paused, head tilting, yet he didn’t face him. “Y’know we love you, right?”

“I know,” you shouldn’t love a monster. “C’mon, my stomach’s growling and I don’t wanna miss out on Kensei’s coconut shrimp.”

A laugh escaped Shinji as he brushed past him, walking ahead of Kisuke, who hesitated for a moment, his head tilting back to study the bedroom. It felt as if something had shifted in that moment.

As if someone had done something.

Thunder rumbled overhead, a summer storm rolling in suddenly.

Strange.

“Kisuke! Get yer ass in here!” Hiyori yelled, startling him from his thoughts. A laugh tittered free as he finally joined his group once more. Even so, something scratched at the back of his mind.

Someone had just arrived in the World of the Living from Soul Society.

“Let’s eat!”

Here we go again.

[woodstockbtswriter]

Voyagers

Genre: Fluff/Headcanon

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader (Female)

Summary: A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to join BTS on a Bon Voyage adventure leads to once-in-a-lifetime love.

Author’s Note: Okay, I just have to say, watching the boys try to filet a fish and not being able to tell them that they were using the wrong knife was painful for me. 😄 Anyway, hope you enjoy this latest installment! 💕

GIF Credit: MONOSUGA

Part Sixteen

Back to Civilization

At the conclusion of your fishing trip, you returned to your campsite to meet up with the rest of the boys, pack everything up, and head to Queenstown

You watched the sun fall lower and lower in the sky from the passenger’s seat as Yoongi drove into the city

By the time you reached your accommodation, the night was completely black

For the last two nights of your trip, you’d be staying in a rental, and though it was hard to see in the dark, you could tell just from the outside that the large, modern house was luxurious

As soon as Yoongi parked the SUV and Jungkook parked the camper, everyone grabbed their suitcases and headed inside

The second you walked in the door, you and the boys were amazed, and the interior designer in you geeked out just a little bit

The house was open-concept, with the living room, kitchen, and dining room all in one large space, and the whole back wall was floor-to-ceiling windows

The design was clean and contemporary, featuring all neutral colors and mixed materials like glass and stone

It was a far cry from the cabins, tents, and camper you’d stayed in the last few nights

And as several of you admired the incredible view of the twinkling city skyline, you agreed it was nice to be back in civilization

Collapsing onto the sofas after bringing in all the luggage, food, and supplies, the boys began discussing how to decide rooms

There were five bedrooms to choose from: three would have to be shared and two would be private

Jin suggested you play the bottle cap game, and Hoseok cleared off the coffee table in preparation

After a quick round of rock-paper-scissors, it was determined that Yoongi would go first, and he casually flicked the plastic bottle cap a little over halfway across the table

Surprisingly, his mediocre shot was enough to win, as everyone else - including you - either overshot or came up short

Having won first pick of the bedrooms, Yoongi chose the private room with the twin-size bed

Which allowed you, as the runner-up, to choose your own room with a full-size bed

Then the rest of the boys scattered, checking out the remaining bedrooms and picking their spots

Jin and Hoseok claimed the room with the king-size bed

Namjoon and Jungkook chose to share the room with the queen-size bed

And Jimin and Taehyung naturally wanted to room together, so they decided on the room with the other full-size bed

Once you were situated in your rooms, everyone began taking turns washing up, and you enjoyed a long, hot shower

Dinner Prep

When you were dried off and dressed in comfy clothes, you made your way to the kitchen

You found a freshly-bathed Yoongi there at the counter, attempting to cut up the salmon you’d caught that afternoon

He appeared to be struggling, so you asked if you could help, but he said the only thing he needed help with was peeling garlic

Jin, Jimin, and Jungkook were already seated around the kitchen table with a half-peeled mound of garlic bulbs between them, so you joined them

Though you had really hoped Yoongi wanted you by his side

You watched him from the table as he continued to wrestle with the fish until he finally admitted defeat

You were about to get up to assist him, but Jin insisted that Yoongi let him try

Jin had some trouble cutting up the fish too, but soon figured it out well enough to prepare passable sashimi

When you and the other garlic peelers finished your task, you moved to the counter to watch Yoongi and Jin work, standing ready if either of them needed your help

Eventually, after putting a pot of water on the stove to boil, Yoongi asked - without looking at you - if you could toast some bread, and you happily obliged

Dinner and Dessert

When the salmon, garlic shrimp, and pasta were ready, everyone took their place at the dining table, and you ended up seated between Hoseok and Taehyung

As you and the boys began filling your plates, Hoseok commented that you all had only one more day of the show left, and the unwelcome reminder made your stomach clench

You couldn’t stop yourself from glancing at Yoongi, hating the thought of your time together coming to an end

Especially after the way he’d been so distant all day

To your surprise, Yoongi was looking directly at you, but quickly turned his gaze toward his lap when he noticed your gaze on him

Then Hoseok lifted his drink, toasting to enjoying the experience until the last moment, and you joined the others in clinking your glasses and bottles together

It was a fitting toast, and as you started on your dinner, you hoped you would be able to enjoy every last moment of this experience

While you ate, the boys began discussing dinner for the next night, saying they’d like to have Korean food

But it suddenly dawned on you that if it was the final night, it would be your last opportunity to make your traditional food for them

So you spoke up, and offered to cook them all dinner the next night

The boys liked the idea, agreeing unanimously and enthusiastically, and you started planning your menu in your mind

After dinner, Jungkook brought out a box of mint chocolate chip ice cream cones and handed them out

Jin lamented that he hated mint chocolate, and Namjoon agreed that it was like mouthwash

Unwrapping his cone, Yoongi said food was food and he wasn’t very picky

You agreed as far as ice cream goes, enjoying your own cone and saying you’d yet to find a flavor you didn’t like

BTS UNO

When you finished your dessert, Namjoon, Taehyung, and Hoseok took charge of cleaning up dinner

While you waited for them to finish, the rest of your group relaxed in the living room, and Jin started shuffling a deck of UNO cards

It was getting late, and as soon as the production crew set up a ring of GoPro cameras in the middle of the coffee table, they wrapped filming and said goodnight

As they left the house and headed for their own accommodations, you and the boys encircled the table and Jin dealt everyone cards

It wouldn’t be a game with BTS if there wasn’t a penalty, so it was agreed before play started that the loser would have to wake everyone else up in the morning

Though you were all tired after a long day, the game was lively, with everyone singing and dancing and laughing as they played

Taehyung wasn’t familiar with the rules, but you grew up playing UNO with your family, so you and Jimin coached him each time it was his turn

But a heated debate occurred when the boys tried to make Yoongi draw ten cards

You immediately came to his defense, telling them they couldn’t stack +2 and +4 cards

Jimin and Jungkook insisted that they could, and you went back and forth until you pulled up the official rules on your phone

They weren’t happy about it, and grumbled as they drew their cards, but you were right

And though Yoongi kept his focus on his hand, a smirk was curling his lips

“At least now I know who’s on my side.” He said, playing his card onto the center pile, and you couldn’t hold back a self-satisfied grin

Play continued for a while, the game lasting longer with so many players, until Jin was finally the first person to go out

The remaining players kept playing, going out one-by-one, until it was down to Yoongi, Jimin, and Taehyung

With only three players, the game went much faster, and Yoongi and Jimin both went out one after the other, leaving Taehyung in last place

Unsurprised, he humbly accepted his defeat and his wake-up penalty, and everyone decided to call it a night

Another Late Night

As the boys dispersed, you hung back, taking your time heading to your room, but it was quickly apparent that Yoongi did not have the same idea

You’d been waiting all night, anxious to finally get an opportunity to talk to him without the cameras

He’d been giving you mixed signals all day, and you were dying to know exactly what he was thinking and where you stood

But as Yoongi disappeared into his bedroom, closing his door behind him, your heart dropped to the floor

Taking a deep breath then exhaling shakily, you entered your own room, trying your best to stay calm

He was just tired, you told yourself

You’d had a long day, and he probably just wanted to go to sleep

That’s all

There’s no reason to freak out

It’s late anyway, and everyone should go to sleep

Reflexively, you pulled your phone from your pocket to check the time and convince yourself of the lateness of the hour

But before you even saw the clock, your eyes were instantly drawn to the notification banner waiting on your screen

You had one unread message from Min Yoongi

You couldn’t tap it open and read it fast enough

Not sure you read it right, you read it again

And again

And again, reading it one word at a time

You then racked your brain, deciding how to answer, before finally sending a casual response

Shoving your phone back in your pocket, you hurried into your bathroom and brushed your teeth as fast as you could, your heart now racing in anticipation instead of sinking in disappointment

As soon as you’d rinsed your mouth out and checked your face in the mirror, you found the small camera mounted in the corner of your bedroom

You gave the lens a bright smile and a cheerful goodnight, then firmly pushed the power button, ensuring the recording light was off

Crossing the room, you smoothed down your clothes and lowered yourself onto the edge of your bed

And your leg began bouncing as you sat

All you could do now…

...was wait

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Taglist: @bucky-thorin-winchester @yvemoon @serpentiinequeen @neilpoetssociety @narcissism-iskey

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #343

“i slither like a viper and get you by the neck  /  i know a thousand ways to help you forget about her”

What's your favorite kind of bear? I don't really know. I just like bears. Have you ever sent a FWD because you were afraid? Ha, yup, as a little kid. Would you ever date more than one person at a time? Nooooo sir. Have you ever rebounded... or been someone's rebound? No. What’s the biggest argument you’ve ever had with a family member? Did things ever go back to how they were beforehand? My grandmother cursed me the fuuuuck out one night as a kid because I was in a mood and didn't tell my mother goodnight. I still remember being called an ungrateful bitch with her like an inch from my face, and admittedly, I was being rude because I wanted to go home, but it kinda scarred me for life. For the remainder of her life, I was always sort of on edge around her and was convinced she didn't like me. Have you ever experienced some kind of natural disaster? I've been through lots of hurricanes. None that massively affected my life, though. If you have pets, do you feed them human food or do they just get regular pet food? If they do get human food, what’s their favorite thing to have? Venus is a snake, so she obviously doesn't get food meant for humans. Roman is very well-trained to not beg or make a move for people's food; he tried once as a kitten, and giving him a pop taught him right away. Have you ever been in a physical fight? Who won? No. What’s the mode of transport that you take or use the most? The car. Mom's, specifically. Have you ever had a zoo keeper experience or anything where you’ve been able to go behind the scenes and look after/feed the animals? No, but I wish. :( Would you ever want the responsibility of being a politician or a similar position of power? NOOOOOOO. What’s something your parents do that really annoys you? Mom is *always* right, pretty much indisputably. And she WILL have the last word. Dad, meanwhile, can be pretty rude to people. I don't think he realizes it half the time, but still. It's not an excuse. What is your main source of anxiety? Social interactions. What’s your favorite 90s cartoon? Pokemon. Describe the moment you realized you were falling in love with someone. I'd rather not. What’s your favorite sparkling water brand/flavor? I've never tried sparkling water. What’s your favorite makeup brand/brands? I don't have a favorite, considering I don't wear it nearly enough and have never even bought my own. I just use whatever Mom buys. What are some female names you would name a baby? Alessandra is my favorite for sure. I also love Anneliese, Justine, Evelyn, Chloe, Evangeline, Quinn... There's a lot. What about male? Severin is my favorite, and I also like Damien, Vincent, Victor, and Luther. Do you have any subscription boxes? No. What fictional creature would you like as a pet? I want a dragon, goddammit. Idc if it can breathe fire ok I want a dragon. Ewoks are also the one and only thing I enjoy from Star Wars. What kind of dwelling do you live in? Just a one-story house. Is there anyone you work with that you don't get along with? Why? N/A Do you have an opinion on adopting/purchasing a pet? PLEASE adopt, especially with cats and dogs, given the number of strays. Purebreds tend to have so many underlying issues, and besides, it's just a LOT of money for an animal that probably wouldn't outlive a mutt. Don't feed the machine if you can. What's your favorite chain restaurant? The Cheesecake Factory or Olive Garden. Why were you last pulled over? I’ve never been pulled over before. What was the last thing you've done on the water? Just kinda swam around a bit in the ocean. It was so warm, totally like a bath. I do NOT miss that sun poisoning, though. Are you cool with swimming in a lake? I think I'd do it if someone invited me to, and the lake didn't look filthy, of course. Do you have a drone? No. What's your favorite hole-in-the-wall restaurant? We have this tiny, local Mexican place that's really good. I don't know the name of it, and I wouldn't share it for obvious reasons. What do you order from there? Chips and salsa of course, along with a shrimp and cheese quesadilla, and finally their cheesy rice. What's your favorite ice-cream flavor? Depending on my mood, it bounces between vanilla with chocolate syrup or just plain chocolate. Do you have any t-shirts from any local businesses? No. Do you listen to any talk shows or podcasts? I used to listen to Mark, Bob, and Wade's podcast, but I'm like... ten months behind, haha. What's something someone calls you that you find endearing? I like "love" a lot. What's your favorite children's book? I loved books like The Rainbow Fish, The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Stellaluna, 10 Minutes 'til Midnight, What Makes a Rainbow?, Chrysanthemum, etc. Is there a new season for a series you're excited to come out? Meerkat Manor comes back this summer, and I am fucking HYPED. How old are you? I'm 25. What is something unique you enjoy about the one you like/love? I tease her about it all the time, but it's really cute that she keeps all of her snakes' good sheds in her room. Proud reptile mom. Are you more liberal or conservative? I'm close to the middle, but I lean towards being more liberal, and I seem to go more that way with time. Do you watch American Horror Story? I used to. I saw the entire first season and really liked it, and then I almost finished the second, but I lost interest. The story got a bit stupid imo. I'd be willing to watch other seasons, though. Does your hometown have any urban legends/scary stories? None that I’m aware of. The people there are scary enough. What's the scariest nightmare you remember having? Let's not talk about it. Are you medicated? Uh very. Are there any apps you're addicted to? Nah. Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? It was initially a bunny holding a polka-dotted blanket, then it become a moose I got from Cabela's when in Ohio. Do you still collect stuffed animals? Only meerkat ones. Have you ever stolen/borrowed clothes from an ex? Haha I've worn Jason's pj pants before and they just kinda... became mine, lol. What's the last movie you watched at home? The Shining, I believe. What's the last movie you watched in theaters? The CGI remake of The Lion King. I still don't get why it was received so badly. Have you ever had eggs cooked over a campfire? I don't think so, no. If you do drink, what's your favorite alcoholic beverage? Margaritas, generally. However, Sara's dad made me this absofuckinglutely incredible chocolate drink before that tasted like a milkshake. It had like, no alcohol flavor, which worked out well for me considering I very much dislike that taste. Are there any songs you've been listening to repetitively lately? There's a new one every day lately, haha. Today it's Halocene's cover of "Love Bites (So Do I)." Cereal, granola, or oatmeal? Cereal. What TV shows did you grow up watching? You gotta gimme an age group... but I'd say the typical stuff for kids of that time. What does your phone case look like? It's just a boring purple that came with it. What were your favorite toys to play with as a child? I looooved playing with my "family" of a father crocodile, a mother deer, their two "children" (a fawn and smaller croc), and "friends" that were little Pokemon figurines. Then there was an evil t-rex with two stupid sidekicks, haha. I can't remember what dinosaurs they were. What's the most embarrassing thing you can ever remember doing? Hold on, lemme find my book. Do you remember what you dreamt about last night? I only very faintly recall dreaming about my cat Roman. Have you ever done anything embarrassing in a dream? Thank FUCK they're just dreams. Do you vape? Nah. What was a song you loved as a child? So uh. Apparently. I loved "Dookie" by Green Day. It's an undying story from Mom about how it came on once at a putt-putt place and I apparently started yelling "dookie!" and dancing. Do you enjoy the Arctic Monkeys? Yeah, I love some of their songs. Are you going to see Finding Dory? You bet your sweet ass I saw it. I've cried everytime I've watched it. Have you ever been horseback-riding? I have not, but I would love to. When was your last piercing? Whenever I got my tragus done, which I can't remember. What did your first crush look like? I don't remember my puppydog love first crush, but I can talk about my first REAL crush, Sebastian. He's a skinny dude with short, brown hair and a lip piercing... I can't remember which kind. He dressed in an emo style, and Facebook pictures at least suggest he still kind of does, I think. Is your body more curvy or flat? Well, I'm not at all skinny, so... What's your least favorite holiday? Probably Christopher Colombus Day, honestly. You didn't discover shit. Don't pretend to me it's worth celebrating in a clean conscience. if you’re having a boring day what do you usually do? If I'm rock-bottom bored, quite honestly, I normally nap, even though I know I shouldn't. Do you turn to food when you're upset? Ugh, I'm admittedly an emotional eater. I got way better about it, and then I started up again. Is your bf/gf good with your parents? I don't have an s/o. Do you think soda should be served at school? Vending machines are fine I suppose, as I don't believe they should be free seeing as they're nothing but sugar content, and I feel schools shouldn't just hand that out to kids at lunch or something. Do dogs have feelings? They sure do. Are you afraid of snakes? Oh no! I adore them. I respect snakes and am going to give wild ones their space for sure considering I don't recognize every native venomous one, but nevertheless, I'm not afraid of them. They are so vital to the ecosystem and are incredibly fascinating animals that deserve our protection. On that note, PLEASE do not kill any snake you come across in your shed or whatever. Call someone to relocate the terrified thing. Favorite snack? It depends on what I'm in the mood for, really. Ever seen The Notebook? Read the book, seen the movie plenty of times. Do you think cussing is trashy? No. Who is the most famous person you’ve met, if any? Nobody. Do you own any animals that aren’t domestic? No. Have you ever feared that you would lose a body part? No. Do you like gore? Yeah, generally. Do you like to drink water? Ugh, I really don't. I wish I did. Have you ever had a wax? I used to get my eyebrows waxed. Do you have any sets of matching bras and underwear? No. Are you any good at improv? Not at ALL.

[lowkeyaesthvtic]

Evil Karma - Chapter 5

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Word Count: 2,096

Summary: Basically the first scene with Uma in D2 but with a little extra

Pairings: Harry x Uma x OC, platonic!OC x Gil, platonic!Harry x Gil

Rating: T

Warnings: just swear words I think

Tags: @descendantofthesparrow @newtshairdryer @kirbiejayhook @amityravenclawelf

From then on, the crew knew that the three of us were not to be messed with. We never came right out and called the three of us a ‘couple’ per se, but they knew that being ‘first mates�� had a special meaning to it. Before us, dating was never really a thing on the Isle. At least, that’s what Harry had told me. “Our parents told us all the time that love was a weakness, and you can’t have weakness if you want to survive here.” Uma brought a tray of pickled egg yolks and grilled fish bits to where Gil was sitting before joining us at our usual spot at the long, wooden table in the back of the restaurant where I had met Uma my first day on the Isle. Only six months have passed since I arrived here, and man oh man have I gone far. After news of Daughter Gothel’s death spread across the Isle, lost boys and girls outside of Uma’s crew finally started to know my name. But it wasn’t my name that made our relationship the ‘exception’ to the supposed rule of love equaling weakness, it was Uma’s.

“Since when did we want to be just like our parents? Since when did we care about what they’d try to teach us? Even Gil hasn’t spoken to Gaston in months and he’s doing fine.” The three of us glanced over at Gil chugging down egg yolks and telling one of the pirates his ‘first time sword fighting’ story for the millionth time. “I mean, for evil’s sake, Sofi sent her father six feet under and arrived at the Isle on her own. Look how she’s doing!”

“Devious as usual,” I responded as she danced her fingers through my hair. Harry smirked at my response as he stood up and walked to where we were sitting, squatting down between us to keep eye contact with his girls.

“Are you feeling devious enough to run a quick errand then, duckling?” Harry asked. Since becoming a first mate, Uma often sent Harry and I on certain ‘errands.’ I never like the use of the word because it makes it sound like some kind of chore, like I don’t have any fun doing it. In reality, any time I get to cause some chaos with my favorite people is time well spent. “The kitchen’s running out of fish and I’m in the mood for a bit of money grabbing. Care to come with?” I look to Uma, silently asking permission. When she nods, I quickly stand from my seat and take Harry’s hand into mine.

“I’ll grab my dagger on the way out.” As we’re walking out of the Chip Shoppe, Harry grabs his sword from the ‘sword check’ barrel by the front door and places it in his sheath.

“You know we should get you a sword too, right? You may not be able to get close enough to use your dagger everytime.”

“Uma said she’s working on it. Apparently Scar’s armory is having some kind of shortage of metal so the only weapons they’re selling are bows and arrows, staffs, you know, all the primitive shit.”

“That damn lion never knows where to get the right shit, does he,” Harry teased. We finally made our way into the bazaar. With dried up fruit stands on our left and cash filled bakeries with molded bread on our right, the opportunities for us were endless.

After about an hour and a half of robbing marketstands, helping ourselves to some fish for the Chip Shoppe, and fighting off street rats trying to graffiti over some street tags that our crew had previously planted, Harry and I made our way back to the Chip Shoppe. People stared, as usual. Harry and I would push them off or threaten them with our weapons, again, as usual. But the pirate territory was not too far from the bazaar we had been stealing from, and everybody knew that if they tried to mess with us, Uma wouldn’t hesitate to throw them to killer sharks.

“Home sweet home,” I hinted towards the broken down green doors and the dilapidated sign above us. I gripped the arch of Harry’s rusted silver hook as the two of us strutted inside. Harry slipped his dark black encased sword into the barrel while I took a quick stroll to the kitchen to place my jade and gold dagger into its private shelf. Other than the obsidian chain that I carried with me everywhere, this dagger was the only weapon I had on the Isle until Uma could get me a sword. It took a little bit of begging to Uma and quite the argument from Ursula herself, but I managed to get my own place for it.

By the time I was done placing my dagger in its home, Harry was close to that table that the three of us had ruled before we left for the bazaar. He pushed a rookie pirate out of the way before climbing on top of said table and laying his hook down. With his now unhooked hand, he turned a tiny knob and switched on the tv. I quietly growled and rolled my eyes when Mal’s face was the first to come onto the screen. With her purple hair replaced by a bleach blonde and King Ben now always attached to her hip, she had faded even more into the fake princess poser act. Just the thought of it alone made me sick. This bleached out, boy crazy bimbo not only gets away with killing an entire island’s worth of innocent young boys, but gets called a hero for it and is on her way to a crown.

Almost immediately after the TV switched on, Uma walked out with a tray of broiled crab legs, small grisly pieces of fried salmon, and tartar sauce that looked like a five year old had wiped their fingers through it. Harry started to chow down, slightly moving his right arm downward to give me room to take a few bites. Uma nudged Harry’s other arm before grabbing a piece of fried fish and chucking it at the screen with an angry shout, aiming directly for Mal’s face. “Poser,” she muttered.

“Traitor!” Harry shouted and chuckled mischievously in response.

“Fucking murderous bitch…” I growled, throwing another piece of fish at the screen. Seconds of silence pass before Uma turns to the rest of the crew sitting at the table with a dangerous glare.

“Hello?!” Uma shouts, causing a storm of screams and flying pieces of fish to fly towards the television. I strut up towards the screen and wipe off a piece of crab with my finger before taking it into my mouth.

“I’d do anything to see her get what she really deserves…”

“Wipe those smiles off their faces...you know what I mean?” Harry finished my previous thought with his own little blurb, leaning his elbow onto the table and returning to the crab on his tray. Uma’s glare seemed to fixate on Gil, who continued to shove pickled egg yolks down his throat as if they were the last thing he’d ever eat.

“Gil.” He looked up at Uma like a confused puppy. “Do you wanna quit choking down yolks and get with the program?” His eyes grew wider in realization.

“Hmm? Yeah, what they said,” Gil mumbled through the food in his mouth.

“That little traitor. Who left us in the dirt.” Uma turned to her crew, riling them up in anger just as she had been since getting with Harry and I.

“Who turned her back on evil,” Harry and I simultaneously added as I swiped a piece of crab from his tray.

“Who said you weren’t big or bad enough to be in her gang!” Only the squawk of a parrot could be heard as Gil practically shouted his response. Despite the tens of glares aiming at him from Uma and the crew, Gil kept going. “Back when we were kids. Come on, you guys remember. She called her Shrimpy and the name just kind of…” Gil’s words began to drift when he made eye contact with Harry, shooting him a scowl strong enough to kill. “..stuck.” Uma sighed and turned to me, placing her hand on my arm.

“That snooty little witch, who grabbed everything she wanted and left me nothing.”

“No, she left you that sandbox, and then she said that you could have the shrimp --” I swiftly interjected Gil’s response, gesturing toward the front doors of the shoppe.

“Do you really want to finish that sentence, Gil?” After switching his glances back and forth between me and the broken green doors, Gil shook his head and continued eating. Harry momentarily stopped eating and gestured toward the restaurant, then the TV.

“Look, we have her turf now. They can stay in Bore-adon--”

“Harry, that’s her turf now!” Uma stomped toward the TV and switched it off, finally ridding our eyes of the bimbo’s plastic face. “And I want it too.”

“She’s got a point, Hooky. We shouldn’t be getting her leftovers. We deserve more than that. We should be over on that island wreaking havoc while she should be here begging the street rats for rotten apples!” Uma smiled before wrapping her arms around Harry, Gil and I.

“Son of Hook, Daughter of Pan, Son of Gaston, and me, most of all, Daughter of Ursula!” I could sense what was coming, and I loved every second of it. Uma turned to me and gently placed her fingers under my chin. “What’s my name?”

“Uma.” My response glistened with admiration and obedience, something I didn’t show often but something I knew she loved. Uma turned to Harry and gripped the arch of his hook, which had since been placed back onto his right hand.

“What’s. My. Name?”

Harry swept off his pirate hat and got down on one knee, as if hailing to his Princess of the sea. “Uma..”

The three of us turned to Gil, hoping he would know the right answer. “What’s my name?”

“Mm. Uma?” Gil was once again caught choking down yolks, but he realized what he was supposed to do.

Uma was an amazing singer and an alluring dancer. So when she brought up the idea to turn her name into an anthem for the crew, I had never been more intrigued and honestly felt a little aroused at the idea. The crew quickly loved it as well, especially Harry. The two of us even made up this little verse that said ‘yeah she’s the Captain and everything, but if you mess with her, you mess with us..and that’s lethal.’ This time, like the other times, the anthem had ended in laughter. The crew was riled up and a bit angry, but in the best way. We were all quickly startled when a long, purple tentacle came railing across the table. We all ducked as Uma jumped to prevent being swept to the ground like a pile of dust. “Shut your clams!” That voice was all too familiar to this crew.

“Mom!” Uma grunted, showing the small part of her that was still young and still a rebellious teenager.

“These dishes ain’t gonna wash themselves!” Some of the pirates, Harry included, were ready to grab their swords from the barrel when Uma shook them off, quickly changing back to her powerful self.

“It’s fine. It’s fine. Cause when I get my chance to rain evil down on Auradon, I will take it! They’re gonna forget that girl and remember the name --”

“Shrimpy!” Gil shouts with excitement, pounding the table. After a slight nod from Uma, Harry looks to Gil and begins to lead him out of the restaurant. This had become a usual punishment for when Gil said something a little too dumb, so none of us were too worried about his well being. As Harry led Gil out, I extended my hand to help Uma down from the table.

“Have you thought of it yet?” I walked with Uma to the kitchen, planning to help ease her work load on the dishes.

“Thought of what?”

“Your plan to rain evil down on Auradon, have you thought of it yet?” She shrugged her shoulders and let out a short laugh.

“Maybe not yet...but I’m guessing you have.” I smiled and turned to her, leaning close to whisper to her.

“What if I told you..that we could give the Isle of the Lost a taste of Neverland magic?”

[panikki]

So Many Ways to be Wicked

The Core Four are heading to Auradon, but not for the reasons their parents think. Sure, they'll be grabbing the wand but it definitely won't be for a bunch of washed up has-beens. With powerful children of the villains by their side, Mal, Jay, Carlos, and Evie will take over Auradon. Long Live Evil

~~~~~

My first fanfiction for this fandom. I initially posted it to AO3 but I thought maybe I should try posting it here for feedback.

Pairings: Jay/Carlos, Mal/Evie, minor Ben/Mal

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Child abuse, implied and referenced rape/non-con (nothing detailed at all), possibly a panic attack but I can’t remember, gore and blood later on

No beta, we die like socially anxious nerds who don’t know how to find betas.

Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 1

Maleficent stood tall and proud in front of the four children, a smirk on her thin lips. The woman was thin, even more so than she had been in her glory days. Behind the four children stood three other villains, Grimhilde, Jafar and Cruella de Vil.

“You’ve been summoned to Auradon, as you all know,” Maleficent gestured to the four identical pieces of fancy parchment that had been crumpled and thrown to the ground in anger. “I expect you to retrieve the wand from that disgraceful faerie who protected Cinderella. You will go to Auradon and do anything you must to get me off this Isle. You do not want to know what I will do, what we,” she gestures to the sneering villains around the room, “will do to you should you fail. Dismissed.” Maleficent twirled around, her staff clutched in her hand with Diavolo perched on top. She did not allow anyone to protest, whether it was the children or the adults. She disappeared into a room, slamming the door shut. Instantly, the adults in the room began talking, arguing with each other, although they would never try to argue with Maleficent when she was so obviously on a power trip. The kids were all frozen in place, different thoughts running through their head, although they all were generally the same; what the absolute fuck.

“The mutt will not be going!” Cruella’s shriek shook the teens out of their stupor. They all looked at each other before they all locked eyes onto Carlos, Cruella’s son. Their eyes held well-hidden apologies and anger on behalf of the boy. His dark eyes were blank, freckles standing out against his pale cheeks. “Who would take care of the chores for me? What’s the point in having him if he can’t do something useful?” With long strides, the woman had made her way beside Carlos. She grabbed him by the dark roots of his white hair and yanked. Carlos fell to his knees, though he didn’t struggle against her. The three teens next to him, Jay, Evie, and Mal tensed, knowing if they tried to intervene it would make things worse for the boy. A boiling, dark anger gripped at their hearts at seeing the youngest of their group at the mercy of the madwoman.

“You will not go to Auradon, do you understand me, mutt?” The woman hissed, spit flying into Carlos’ face. Carlos barely flinched, having dissociated a while ago. Like a robot, the boy whispered a quiet ‘yes ma’am’ that satisfied Cruella. She let go of his hair, shaking the clump she had pulled out off of her hand with a sneer. Carlos slumped forward, a hand slowly going to the back of his head. He drew his hand back sharply, though he didn’t make a noise of pain. His fingers came back with a bit of blood on it and he knew without having to look that his friends were livid.

“Jadid cannot go either,” Jafar threw in, always wanting to put in his own two cents. Jay rolled his eyes before turning to face the man, keeping his face carefully blank. Even the slightest twitch of his face could set his father off, yelling and screaming about how Jay was useless, a bastard child with no talent, how everything would be better if Jafar had tossed Jay off the edge of the Isle and let the sharks have at him. “Jay has tasks that need to be fulfilled, my shop needs to be stocked. Even if his wares are abysmal and disappointing, much like himself.” Jafar sneered at the tall boy, crossing his thin arms over his chest.

“Well, Genevieve will be happy to go. She’s a princess, that is where she belongs. With a handsome prince that she can marry. Not too mention the amount of money she will inherit once that handsome prince dies suddenly,” Grimhilde smiled wide, a faraway look in her dark eyes. Evie walked to her mother’s side, her mother grabbing her slender wrist.

“Yes, and once he is out of the picture, I would send for you, mother,” Evie said in a gentle voice. Grimhilde’s smile grew impossibly wider and her long nails cut into Evie’s wrist.

“That’s ENOUGH,” Mal shouted, fed up with everyone talking and arguing over something that could not be changed. Mal’s eyes flashed an iridescent green, the only hint that she possessed Maleficent’s heritage as a faerie. Begrudgingly, the elder villains stopped talking to themselves and muttering threats to their child (at least in the de Vil’s case). “Unless you want to be chopped up by the goblins and thrown into the water or fed to the beggars, I suggest you remind yourselves that this plan was made by Maleficent, someone much more powerful than the three of you combined. The plan will go into play and there is nothing you can do to stop it. No one will care if the creep in the shop, the hermit from the old castle and the insane puppy skinner (oh I’m sorry, you never actually were able to go through with that were you?) suddenly disappeared.” The three children of said villains stepped away from the parents slightly, expecting an explosion. There was none, not yet anyway.

“Come, Jadid, we must go,” Jafar said, his skeletal face turned into a sneer, an evil look in his black, beady eyes. 

“He will go nowhere. If you don’t remember, Jafar, but we must plan and you don’t want to cross Maleficent, right?” Mal smirked. They had one week to plan, enough time where they can hide out in Carlos’ hideout or in an abandoned room in Grimhilde’s castle. The kids had things they needed to do and Mal needed every one of them at their best, especially if they were to approach a certain gang on the Isle. Jafar grimaced and disappeared, his ratty cloak sweeping out with him. Cruella had devolved to talking to herself and her fur coat and Grimhilde hadn’t heard a word, too busy fussing over the wrinkles she had gained. Mal took advantage of the situation, beckoning the three other villain children to follow her. They made their way out the back door of the castle and through the streets.

“What’s going on Mal?” Evie whispered, smiling coyly at a middle-aged henchman while Jay swiftly took what he had been holding and what had been in his pockets. They swiftly danced around any potential threats and broke any hands that tried to pickpocket them.

“Mal, where is it we’re going?” Carlos asked, barely looking as he twisted the wrist in his hands until he heard a cry of pain and a snap. He threw the elder villain’s arm away from him and caught up with the others.

“To the hideout, where Maleficent won’t be able to use her nasty little spies to listen to us talk about our plan for Auradon,” Mal finally answered. They were in a more abandoned part of the Isle, so she thought it okay to finally speak. However, she caught the sight of a shadow moving in an alley. She froze, a hand coming up to stop the rest of the gang. She then pointed down the alley. Jay and Carlos broke out of formation, being the strongest and quickest of the bunch. They peeked around the corner to see Gil Legume hurriedly rushing towards the peer.

“Fuck,” Carlos whispered before sprinting after the man. He easily jumped and ducked under obstacles that gave Gil trouble, meaning he caught up with the teen quite easily. Jay was close behind, backup in case Carlos needed it. Carlos perched atop a pipe that ran from building to building before pouncing down, landing nimbly on his feet right in front of Gil. Gil startled, backing up into Jay. Carlos smiled charmingly.

“Now where do you think you’re going?” He asked in a smooth, quiet voice. It sent shivers down Gil’s back, and not pleasantly like the shivers running up Jay’s back. 

“Um-I was just, ya know, heading to the shop to, uh, talk to Uma,” Gil stammered out, eyes widening when he looked behind Jay to see the two girls walking towards them.

“And what, evil tell, were you going to talk to her about?” Evie asked sweetly. Gil perked up, a goofy grin plastered on his face.

“I was gonna tell her about you talking about Auradon and your plan!” He exclaimed, giddy like a small puppy. Mal stepped forward.

“Let him go Carlos, Jay. Legume, tell Shrimpy I want to talk. The Pirate Queen, I hear she calls herself. Obviously a bad parody of the Dragon Queen, but whatever sinks her boat,” Mal sneered. Carlos stepped out of the way and they all watched as the Legume boy stumbled his way to the Fish and Chips shop Uma and her little pirate crew worked at.

“This is going to be great, much better than expected,” Mal sing-songed before turning on her heel and heading back towards the hideout.

Once inside the graffitied walls, they all crash landed onto the closest bed. They were all completely overwhelmed with what had to be done, but they also had to come up with a game plan for whenever Uma got the message.

“We’ll be going to the shop tonight,” Mal said from her spot squished between Evie and Carlos.

“Why do you need to speak with Uma anyway?” Evie asked, resisting the urge to furrowed her brow. Wrinkles were unsightly.

“The shrimp may be a bitch but she’s been able to round up an entire crew and get them to follow her and her alone, without the use of her mother,” Mal spat out, grinding her teeth. “We could use someone like that when we take over Auradon. When we are the kings and queens, we can’t have those pirates working against us, now can we?” 

“What?” Carlos asked, sitting straight up and jostling Jay with his bony shoulder. “We aren’t gonna get the wand and free Maleficent?”

“Evil no Carlos, get with it,” Mal said, though there was little malice in her tone. “Why would I give the wand to a bunch of pathetic has-beens who didn’t even get it right when they had the chance? No, we will steal the wand but not for them. We will become rulers of Auradon! Us and all the other VKs stuck on this hell of an Isle. We’ll see who’s laughing, then.”

[italianfish]

Here’s some things that I’ve overheard recently

- That bridge was created by erosion

- Holy tolino that’s a nice tree!

- Ivy! There’s the guy we don’t like (Trump in a car)

- Why wouldn’t you want to be king? You could get corgis, they’re adorable

- That’s not an allergy, that’s a life choice

- Are you that one guy? Are you DongleMc DongleSon?

- Woooo! CHEMEX!

- THE FURIES ARE COMING

- I NEED A BOYFRIEND AND A SWEATSHIRT

- I wonder what animal that is? Oh wait, it’s a log

- Just a cone, no ice cream. I don’t like ice cream

- My chicken BLT came without the chicken!

- I should have kept the headband from the tampons

- You’ve been reduced to a codename

- Hug, Marry, Exile, the Brucified sleepover game

- It’s just the toes

- Parf Tarts

- It’s crispy?!?!

- When I’m like, 60, I’m going to do drugs

- What really is life without watching Bob Ross?

- 13 YEARS!!!

- Stacy’s mom is Parker’s grandma~

- EmBruce it

- It’s not a water break, it’s a hydration break

- That bird is using a crosswalk!

- I don’t know any colleges in Massachusetts!

- What even is frick without frack

- I’m emotionally offended by your haircut

- That’s like a cat fart

- Someone just shat

- I’M NOT A CHILD PREDATOR DEANNA!!!

- I’ll sue that movie, they stole my idea (Just finished watching Hotel Transylvania 3)

- See, Amanda. That’s your noise

- My mom told me that if you sleep with your phone under your pillow you get fat

- If he were gay he’d be adorable

- He’s racist to chairs

- Flarion is my boob

- Don’t throw the ball at the referee, it’ll hurt his feelings

- Fuck yeah, your name’s Keith

- Can you deep throat a firecracker?

- Your earlobe is soft

- I would sell my toes for my old hair

- It’s like eating a period, NO

- What a funny looking animal (Giraffe)

- Giraffes are the most ridiculous animals

- Ew, keep your ebola away from me

- Look at that glass shard, that must be uncomfortable

- Do sloths have ears?

- Lip jellies freak me out

- A: I have three boobs (Sloth in shirt) B: I have uh.... Arthritis

- Instagram knows I’m lonely

- Knock on any Nonna’s door and tell them you’re Jewish and they’ll pity you and throw you a feast

- But this time it’s just the nose

- I want Granny panties

- Why do we only have confidence when our shirts are off?

- Why is an 8 year old twerking on my leg

- She has curves, you have rectangles

- I’m depressed, give me your water

- Dude! I look like a freaking lion!

- My loofa unraveled...

- I’m eating ramen with a singular coffee straw

- These walls better be soundproof (Amanda loudly singing in the background)

- I’m ready for my 4am Taco Bell runs

- Wifi in Spanish is wee-fee

- I didn’t see the body

- We should crochet together

- Yeah! I was a baby model.

- I don’t know if he likes me or if he’s just the gay best friend

- Have you pooped this week? You need to poop

- You’ve got all your limbs and you’re ready to go

- I need affection

- Diego’s eating rocks again~

- Wait. You’re instagramming my dog?

- I love letting people know what I’m up to

- It’s so funny, it’s like the ying and the yang

- You’re in my world now Grandma

- Two nipples? I don’t need nipples

- You are one gassy fellow

- You’ve got a lot of nerve showing up on our side of the bus

- I can never tell if you’re just depressed or listening to music

- I’ve got a photo shoot coming up for a calendar, for hot teachers with 6-packs. I’m October

- 38 on rotten potatoes!

- I’m hungry, I’m delirious

- DON’T PINCH MY CHUB

- I love clapping thighs in the evening

- Dude, I’m so ready to mingle

- Do you have a magician book

- Let’s taste those minerals

- The sauce is forever

- Why is everything so straight

- The right nipples don’t deserve rights

- We used to have a zebra and he was vicious

- Very important, I forgot shoes

- You look like a lumber snack

- A: I’m the only one here who looks like a hobo B: Really? Say that again A: We can be hobos together

- Woah dude! Can we take a picture of you? *Truck next to the bus*

- What were you guys doing? Bathing yourselves in the toilet?

- I want to be those people in Wii sports (The background characters that make the noises)

- Then we can have a dance party in a prison cell!

- Most of the bible sounds like gay fanfics

- It’s Frozen all over again!

- I have my metal bus on the straw

- My mom told my Dad to not be a weenie

- I’m going to build my house doors really short so you can’t come in

- Do you want to be black with me?

- Are you the black man?

- How did chutes and ladders go sexual?

- What if there was a rotisserie chicken hanging from the ceiling

- No one said Californians are smart, they’re just hippies who smoke weed

- Stop losing me in airport bathrooms

- What’s with those muscular kneecaps

- Queers doesn’t shake hands

- I’m drowning! I’m not even in the water

- Is this baptism?

- Breakfast doesn’t deserve grace

- It’s not just airport bathrooms

- Ice Age, watch it, absorb it

- I call first waz

- If you’re saying waz you’re not fancy

- I have so many bodily fluids to get rid of

- Don’t eat the lotion samples

- Why are our shoes not curved

- I’m just a fat guy so everything is delicious

- My name is Gay Fieri

- *Monotone iCarly theme song*

- I love Chipoodle

- The others are just Bat-ships

- You ever tie a banana to a tree?

- Can we have a fashion show?

- I’m gonna waz myself

- That’s the Death Star again

- Why do you have glitter on you?

- I smoke the mara-ja-wanna

- I have a gelato emergency

- This is our entertainment for the day (Watching a (probably) crazy man dance)

- I have a lot of questions about pottery

- Ever since I was a small child I have found myself goo-goo-ga-ga

- There are too many cans

- We need to stop canning beans

- Forks are way better than spoons

- I hate spoons

- Do you not want two hours of smooth jazz

- A man just stole my nut

- That’s a really bad name for a gay bar

- Is your tongue comfortable in your mouth

- I’m a penguin enthusiast

- He kept force feeding me marshmallows

- Why would you judge a girl by her neck?

- Are there shampoo bars?

- Why would you want a shampoo bar?

- Don’t burn down the house

- Halloween is my day

- You want to be hydrated?

- Are you kidding me? Right in front of my salad?

- We can still cartwheel into a fiery ball

- It’s your last day of camp, why are you trying to land a plane

- There’s a scale from dude to bro to sir

- Gotta vacuum the bird

- I’m teaching my rabbit spanish

- Ok, who got the cheese on a bun???

- I feel like a wet lasagna

- You can get a star for Jazz???

- I have 3 bottles of hand sanitizer

- A- We make children cry! B- NO WE DON’T

- A- Can I have chicken on a plate? B- Chicken on a plate? A- Chicken on a plate

- I want to go to band to get sweaty

- Proactive, it helps your face

- The cult meeting is next week from 2-7

- This is so vegany

- I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THE SONG! NOT THE BEATLES!

- I have shrimp for later

- It burns my eyes, I love it

- It’s not that we hate you, it’s just that sometimes we can’t stand you

- Locked and loaded for a photoshoot first period

- This chalk keeps following me

- Kinda like a Starbucks atmosphere

- How dare she learn how to drive

- You have to sing our anthem with us

- It fits right into the squiggle

- I’m immune to hot sauce (Downs little cup of hot sauce)

- How was fake meatloaf?

- Can you train a fish?

- I haven’t worn pants in a year

- It smells like yogurt

- I have ties for every holiday

- There’s no laws on the moon, so like, you could kill someone???

- Optional means I don’t do it

- I’m gonna cook your dog!!!

- Is that where we almost went to park jail?

- We don’t condone sporting

- I want to turn orange

- Let’s make a buzfeed quiz that tells you what bridge you are

- (In Spanish) Where is the milk?

- If silence is gold, duct tape is silver

- A: So, what are you guys doing? B: Drugs.

- Young successful jewish boy

- A: I’m fun size! *Friend laughter* B: I’m just short...

- A: Where’s my medal??? B: Up your ass

- I’m a leech

- If anyone’s getting salmonella, it’s going to be me

- Does it involve backflips?

- I get to see all the little children getting confused as you disappear into a chair

- I think someone stole my balls by now

- A- A plastic knife can cut another plastic knife B- Why did you cut a plastic knife? A- Dedication!

- A- Oh my god! B- What does this have to do with god? C- *Whispering* Everything

- You’re probably going to die of liver

- I’m a five year old! You can’t have that profanity in here!

- Hey kids get in the van, we’ve got free wifi

- That’s worse than 10 babies hanging from a tree

- Are you from the piggers of creation???

- A- You’re like an old married couple B- (From the distance) He started it!

- I am a Jesus Christ in a person!

- YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MANY CHROMOSOMES THAT COST ME!!!

- I will implant a chip in your ankle! And you won’t know which one!

- I’M AN AVATAR! AIR! (Nothing happens) AIR! (Still nothing)

- When I was on a plane, we started dropping 200 feet at a time, the funny thing was that half of the plane had just gotten their drinks so half the plane was soaked

- Is Christianity a cult?

- A- Do you have experiences with holes B- (Very Unsure) Yes

- I’m her bitch, not your bitch

- He has the IQ of half a ferret

- A- Did you read the game manual? B- The gay manual??

- I want the pleasure of whipping you

- One time I poured a glass of apple cider vinegar and I drank it

- I changed my name to Johnyay West

- Too much damage done to the duner

- On a scale to 1 to Bill Cosby

- Ariana Grande is a criminal

- A- It’s sticky B- Can I take that out of context? A- No

- YOU ZIP TIED HIM TO A CHAIR?!

- It’s half past a freckle

- I need the crotch

- I don’t have imaginary friends. I don’t have friends.

- It’s like a mini fridge for pillows

- You hurt yourself with a stationary elbow

- My parents met at Burger King

- A- What’s the capital of Ohio B- Arkansas...?

- A- What do you do after school? B- Eat C- Sleep D- Cry

- Ask for cocaine, not Coca-Cola

- HOW HAVE YOU NOT TOLD US YOU MAKE STAINED GLASS?!

- You stole my meme bro

- A- Where you the one who drank chocolate sauce? B- (Seemingly proud) Yes.

- OW! MY CALVES!

- The Kardashians are necessary in our society!!!

- I feel like a homeless prostitute

- Ya wanna share a fork

- Now you have a pile of hot cheese

[i-kaiwen]

13. “I dare you to kiss me.” (do you want me to send you more because i will and i love you)

((I’d say yes, but you already sent me a bunch to work on xD I love youuuuu and hope you enjoyed this one (≧◡≦) ♡))“Whose stupid fucking idea was it to play Truth or Dare anyways? What are we, fucking five?” Bakugou barked out, arms crossed after being shoved into the circle of idiots who called themselves his ‘friends’.

“Dude, have some chill,” Kirishima grinned, slapping Bakugou on the back and earning a growl in response. “It’s just a fun way to pass the time.”

“...With vodka?”

Sero piped in next. “Hey, it was better than Kaminari’s idea - he wanted to play Kings. Last time we did that, we lost Midoriya for two days after he ended up with the King’s Cup.”

“I told you that was a bad idea, but noooo,” Midoriya grumbled, Ochako patting his shoulder reassuringly from his left side. He seemed to already be a little bit tipsy, freckles popping against cherry-red cheeks. “It was all ‘Let’s give the lightweight the giant bottle of mixed alcohol and hope he doesn’t die!’”

Todoroki shook his head from the otherside of the green-eyed boy. “I’m strangely glad I wasn’t here that weekend… Where did you end up going, Midoriya? I don’t believe I was ever told the full story.”

“I somehow ended up in Kyoto…” Midoriya replied, shaking his head as he slumped in his spot. The blush on his face only seemed to deepen as he explained what happened. “I guess it was because we started early enough that I somehow managed to disappear from the common room, catch the last non-stop train in nothing but my boxers and Uraraka’s tank top -”

“Which I still have no idea how he got!” Uraraka chimed in.

“ - And end up three and a half hours away from school without a phone. People thought I was a hobo!”

“Aw, Deku, it could have been so much worse!” Ashido laughed. “At least you made it home in one piece and Iida found you before anything serious happened!”

“Yes, we must be thankful for the fact that I had decided to visit family that very weekend!” Iida shouted in drunken delight, chopping his hands vigorously through the air. Apparently, no one told him the punch was spiked.

“Oi, Deku, that’s fucking stupid - even for you.”

“Kacchaaaaaan!” Izuku whined, pouting before taking another a sip of his drink. He shuddered at the taste before continuing. “It wasn’t my fault!

“You aren’t nearly as bad as Kaminari screaming ‘shrimp heaven now’ at a bag of potato chips…” Jirou grumbled.

“Alright, alright everyone. Let’s get back to the game. Bakubro, since you just joined, rules are easy - you pick truth or dare, do the thing. If you decide to not do the thing, you get to take a penalty shot from this surprise drink that Sero made,” Kirishima explained, Sero giving thumbs up as his name was mentioned. “After you’re done, you get to pick the next person and have them go. The game ends… well, probably when someone gets bored or if one of us ends up setting off the fire alarm again. You got it?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m not a fucking moron. I know how it works,” Bakugou sneered, reaching for the can of coke Kirishima handed him. “Can we just fucking get this over with?”

“Who went last anyways? I totally forgot,” Kirishima questioned, scratching the back of his head sheepishly.

“I believe it was Ashido.” Yaoyorozu answered, braiding her hair from her place next to Jirou.

“Ah, yeah, that was me!” Ashido turned to look around the room before picking her next victim. “Tsu, truth or dare.”

“Hm... I’ll go with truth this round.”

Ashido grinned. “Alright, not gonna make it easy on you. Have you ever made out with someone here?”

Asui raised an eyebrow before pointing at Uraraka seated directly next to her. “Considering we’ve been dating for two years, I’d say yeah.”

“Oh, uh… yeah. I guess I forgot about that?”

Jirou snorted, yawning into her hand. “Good job, Ashi.”

“I wasn’t thinking, okay?”

“Clearly.”

Before an argument could break out, Asui jumped in. “Hey Midoriya, truth or dare?”

“Oh!” Midoriya jumped in surprise, green eyes blinking owlishly. “ My turn. Uh…”

“Deku, don’t pussy out and pick truth!” Bakugou jeered from across the circle.

“I-I wasn’t going to! Dare!”

Finger to her chin, Asui seemed to ponder for a moment. “Give someone your phone and let them send one text to anyone in your contacts.”

“W-what?! You can’t be - Tsuyu!”

“Hand it over, Deku,” Uraraka grinned, grabbing his phone from his hand before pulling up his contacts. “Don’t worry, I won’t make it that bad.”

“Unless you’d rather take the penalty shot?” Kaminari jumped in, eyebrows wiggling as he gestured to the mystery drink sitting innocently on the coffee table behind him.

Remembering the last time he had some sort of unknown beverage, Midoriya sighed in defeat. “Just… please don’t make it that bad.”

“Done and sent!” Uraraka cheered, handing the device back to its owner.

“Do I even want to know what you wrote...?” He mumbled, trying to pull up his text messages to see what was sent.

“Nope, and I’ll never tell - I deleted it after I sent it,” the brown hair girl cackled, Midoriya shaking his head in response. “Deku, it’s your turn now!”

Breathing deeply through his nose to try and work through the effects of the drinks in his system, he looked around the circle before emerald eyes met crimson. He grinned oddly, an almost evil glint in his eye as he found his victim. “Kacchan, truth or dare.”

“Psh, what do you think? Dare, of course. Give me your fucking worse, shitty Deku.”

Midoriya was clearly a bit more drunker than he was letting on as he smirked in Bakugou’s direction. “I dare you to kiss me.”

Kirishima barked out a laugh, slapping his friend on the back as Bakugou choking on the soda he decided to knock back at that very moment. The rest of their classmates stared in shock, unsure in what direction this would go.

Gathering himself after a moment, Bakugou wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he glared at his childhood friend. “Are you serious right now?”

“Nope, dead serious!”

“I am not fucking doing that. No way in fucking hell.”

“Well, I mean… I guess you get to do the penalty drink then,” Midoriya shrugged, nonchalantly staring down at his nails as he tried not to shiver in glee. He found this tiny bit of revenge comical, knowing that Bakugou would never go as far as to do it - and therefore he’d have to take the penalty.

“No way, I’m not drinking that cat piss. Who knows what the fuck is in that?”

“Wow,” Kaminari whistled, shaking his head. “Never knew Bakugou to be a chicken.”

“Who said I was a chicken, Pikachu?!”

“I’m actually a little surprised something a simple as a little kiss would get him to back down,” Ashido whispered to Jirou, earning a nod of agreement.

“I swear to god, I will murder all of you!”

“Oh, how the mighty have fallen!” Kaminari continued to egg on dramatically, falling over to land in Sero’s lap with a wave of his hand.

“Oi, you don’t think I can do it? Fucking watch this!” Bakugou growled out before diving across the room, calloused hands grabbing roughly at flushed cheeks before dragging the others lips to meet his own.

The reactions from the group ranged from shocked gasps to cheers, with Kirishima oddly enough yelling ‘my OTP!’ amidst the chaos and screaming. After a few moments, the noise tapered down to the classmates laughing amongst themselves as they expected to hear the curses being thrown from Bakugou and the stammered apologies of Midoriya.

Except… they were still going.

They both seemed to be very much into it, one of Bakugou’s hands threaded through Midoriya’s thick curls, the younger’s hands gripping tightly to the fiery blond’s hips, lips continuing to meet in a quick succession of touches.

Eyes meeting from around the circle, no one spoke up for half a minute before Ashido hesitantly decided to speak. “Uh… guys? You… you know you can stop now… right?”

...

Across the campus, staying late into the night to finish grading papers, a cell phone chimed with a new message.

Problem Child (22:24): This is a mass text: Does anyone know where I am?

Aizawa blinked in surprise for a moment before groaning loudly, forehead meeting his desk heavily. “I swear to God, if this kid ended up in Kyoto again…”

[httpwarmth]

girl almighty // chapter one

words: 3769 a/n: my oc is daughter of gaston, gatsby legume. a little long for a first chapter but i hope you enjoy! :)

----

The Isle of the lost, it was home sweet home to many. That was after the king decided to ship off anyone that was interesting to the gloomy island surrounded by not only water, but a barrier too. There was no way that you could get off this isle, unless you were invited off the island. Like some kids were about six months ago. Carlos who was the son of Cruella de Vil, Mal who was the daughter of Maleficent, Evie who was the daughter of the Evil Queen and the worst one of all, Jay, the son of Jafar. The thief that could steal everything, including your heart if you left it out on a silver platter, which too many girls have done way too often. The group of four were chosen by Prince Ben to go to the preppy school that is Auradon to try and fit in. The first step of Prince Ben’s plan to reunite Auradon and the Isle of the Lost. One day they were here and the next they were gone, without a single goodbye. Gatsby Legume often tried to push the memories that held remnants of the time she spent with him. He was gone and the only way she would ever see him again was if by some miracle, she made it to Auradon. She doubted the Prince Ben, who was now king, would ever think of choosing her to go to the prep school. She was, after all, the daughter of Gaston. The man who pined after Ben’s mother for so many years until she finally fell in love with a beast out of all people. Talk about Stockholm syndrome. Taking the steps two at a time up to Ursula’s Fish and Chips, Gatsby was only here for one reason. She didn’t want to spend any extra time in the restaurant that smelled like it was bathed in the sea water with an extra hint of a strong fish smell that always came from the back where the gross food cooked. Ironically, Ursula opened up the restaurant to serve any type of sea food to the residents of the isle but as time has gone on, Ursula began to focus more on the interesting soap operas that played on the dingy television in her office, rather than her money making shack. Now, her eldest daughter Uma took over most of the shop, becoming the one to work the most out of all of Ursula’s workers. She didn’t get much money out of it but it was a great place for her crew to meet up. The restaurant was always over flowing with Uma’s pirate crew and Gatsby’s knew that she could find what she needed to in the midst of the pirate crew. Though, she wasn’t raised by a pirate, she managed to work her way up the ladder to where she was the captain of their little gang. Harry Hook, son of Captain Hook, was her right hand man and her second in command. The rest were just part of the crew, always backing up Uma in any type of situation. Her older brother, Gil, was part of Uma’s crew. Though he wasn’t always the smartest cookie in the tin, he still had a somewhat heart of gold, which was more than Gatsby could say for the rest of Uma’s crew. Gil always found the adventures that the crew went on and how evil the crew could be to be fun and as Gil always said, who could say no to Shrimpy? Gatsby. Gatsby could always say no to Shrimpy. Pushing open the saloon type uneven blue door, Gatsby entered the restaurant and was immediately hit by the horrible smell. Scanning the restaurant, she was just met with different patrons who sat at various tables. They all had one distinguishable feature though, they were all dirty. In this area of the isle of the lost, it wasn’t common for those who spent most of their time around this part to be clean. The one time they do get clean is if they ever decide to just take a swim and dive off the pier, which wasn’t very common. Most of them sported tangled hair, missing teeth and tattered clothes and while Gatsby has had her fair share of tattered clothes, she couldn’t help but wrinkle her nose in disgust at the mixture of smells that surrounded her. She was Gaston’s daughter after all. “Uma?” Gatsby yelled into the restaurant, still standing on the platform where the door was. As she scanned throughout the restaurant, looking for Gil or Uma or anyone that she recognized. The long table in the back of the restaurant that sat in front of the small television that always played news of what was going on in Auradon sat empty except for one pirate that picked at his food. For the first time in a long time, Uma wasn’t having a meeting with the people that obeyed her every words. Out of the corner of her eye she could see an older lady looking at her, missing her two front teeth and with wild curly hair that seemed to stick out in any possible direction and when Gatsby turned to look at her, the lady focused her attention back on the pile of mush that sat on her plate. “Shrimpy?” Gatsby yelled another nickname for Uma, one that she preferred over her actual name. It was given to her at a young age because of the fact that she always seemed to smell like shrimp. The nickname stuck because of Gil always calling her it on accident and it rubbed off on Gatsby at one point. Gatsby saw Uma walk out of the kitchen, with an annoyed look on her face. She rolled her eyes when she saw Gatsby standing near the door. It wasn’t a secret to anyone on the isle that Uma preferred the older twin to Gatsby because Uma always thought that Gatsby was too smart for her crew. “Hey Shrimpy,” Gatsby started with a tight lipped smile. She walked down the two steps to the actual floor of the restaurant before stopping at one of the round tables. She grabbed a fry off of the random’s man plate and munching on it. “Where’s Gil?” Uma threw the plate of fried clams and some sort of meat substance in front of a waiting customer before shrugging her shoulders. “I think I saw Harry and him down by Pirate’s Bay.” Gatsby rolled her eyes. “Of course they are.” She turned to leave, knowing that she’ll probably be late to the dinner. She told Gil every single week that he needed to make time in his practically empty schedule to go to dinner with their Uncle Lefou but week after week, he seemed to suddenly be super busy and send Gatsby on a wild goose hunt throughout the isle because she knew that her older brothers didn’t care enough to go find him. “Gil!” Gatsby yelled once she reached the bay. The entire dock was completely made up of wood with twists and turns of ramps and stairs that led to the gigantic pirate ship that was docked. It was the Jolly Roger, Captain Hook’s ship and it was always docked there because where else would Hook take the ship? With the barrier up, there wasn’t very much room for sailing. Harry was the first one to look up between the two while Gil was oblivious to his younger sister’s yelling. He hit the front of his boot against Gil’s leg causing the blonde to look up, slightly confused. Gatsby stopped at the bridge that separated those who sat on the pier to entering the pier. She put a hand on her hip while raising an eyebrow at Gil. “Do you know where we have to be right now?” She asked. She saw the sheepish look on Gil’s face and knew that the boy probably forgot this time. He probably got tied up with fixing the Jolly Roger with Harry and lost track of the time and date. Suddenly, her anger melted away at how much of an airhead her brother could be. Her once annoyance that she would be late to the dinner was replaced with the words that she would use to explain to her uncle as to why the two were late. Lefou always took extreme measures trying to find some type of food that the two sets of twins would all like. She waited as Gil began to clean up. She looked across the way at the kingdom that was Auradon. She wondered what the old villain kids were doing and she was sure that it was way better than what was going on in the Isle. She heard rumors that Auradon was filled with beautiful enchanting lakes, trees that grew up and touched the sky changing colors when the seasons changed and large castles that were changed into prep schools when certain men became kings. It was a beautiful kingdom and while everyone on the isle seemed to want to trash any single poster put up about Auradon, Gatsby just wanted to see the beauty with her own eyes. “You’re looking absolutely ravishingly today.” Gatsby heard a certain Scottish accent say in her direction, dragging her attention away from Auradon. She faced her attention back on Harry and a scowl crawled onto her face. As much as she hated to admit that Harry was gorgeous, probably the most gorgeous on the Isle with such high cheek bones and a gorgeous accent, but she just could help but to hate him. He was the Isle’s second biggest flirt, behind Gatsby of course. Right after Jay and the rest of them went to Auradon, Gatsby wanted to forget everything about Jay so she went after every single bachelor on the isle. Every single bachelor except for Harry and it started out because he was Uma’s second in command but as much as she tried to push him away, he just kept following her like a lost little puppy, always trying to flirt with her at any single, possible moment. As much as Gatsby loved being noticed and complimented by attractive guys, she never saw herself being with Harry. He was always with Uma and Gatsby wasn’t the closest with Uma. “Harry,” She gives him a fake smile, crossing her arms over her chest. “I see that you still don’t know where your waterline ends.” She motions to her own clean line of black eyeliner that was swiped along the inside of her lower eyelid. The boy always wore copious amounts of eyeliner around the icy blue eyes that he sported. Gatsby remembered that his bright eyes that were surrounded by the dark makeup was the first thing that she noticed about him and she thought that it made him different than most guys on the isle. Many of them didn’t think that men should wear makeup but Gatsby guesses that pirate’s just did it differently, especially Harry. As it seems that as the day progressed, he would only put more eyeliner on until he resembled a raccoon. Harry took a few steps closer to the girl who was only a few months younger than him. “Well then dearie, maybe you can teach me how to do my makeup just like you do yours.” He lowers his voice as he got closer to her, whispering in her ear. The close proximity to someone of the opposite gender should’ve been familiar to Gatsby but his thick accented words still managed to send a shiver down her spine, as much as she hated to admit it. Goosebumps appeared on her smooth arms and she wished that they would go away. Instead of doing anything that her body screamed for her to do, she instead scoffed and pushed the taller boy away from her. The thick winged eyeliner that she managed to figure out how to do after watching the Auradon news for so long. She often admired the girl’s who went to Auradon’s makeup and wanted hers to look like that. Makeup in the Isle was often times, cheap and messy and it took Gatsby so long to figure out how to make her lines clean and to stretch out past her eyelids. She spent way too long in front of broken mirrors, wiping off the dark eye makeup and starting again and some days, she almost looked like she was trying to copy Harry’s way of doing makeup. “In your dreams, Hook.” She responds to the boy’s wishes. A chuckle emitted itself from the boy’s throat as his smile grew. He took a step to close more of the space between the two again. He moved strands of the dark hair that framed her face away from her face with the hook that he always seemed to carry around. “You’re always in my dreams, lassie.” He stared down at her. “Gats, you ready to go?” Gil asks, appearing next to the two and Gatsby has never been more excited to see her doofus of a brother. He stopped her from doing whatever it was that her subconscious wanted her to do. She was always supposed to hate Harry but he wasn’t making it very easy that’s for sure. Gatsby nods and takes a few steps away from Harry before turning around, her black hair flowing out behind her. “I’ll see you in my dreams.” Harry called out after her. Gatsby rolled her eyes but continued to walk with Gil. She knew that if they made it to their uncle’s house soon, they might be some food left. It was really a hit or miss on whether or not Lefou could manage to hold down the older twins down. The Gaston’s usually ate anything that was placed in front of them. Their father always lectured towards his children that they should always eat anything that was placed in front of them because one, it would cause for them to grow up big and brawny, just like him, and two, you don’t know where your next meal is going to come from and if there is another meal. Gaston might’ve not been the most caring father but he knew how to teach his children how to survive on the isle and Gatsby was thankful for that. Mostly because neither Gil nor her spent much time at their house but she knew that her twin would be safe. His skull might be a little thick but he knew to take care of himself. As the two made their way through the marketplace, Gatsby listened to the blonde ramble on about what happened when he was fixing up the Jolly Roger with Harry and how Harry almost hooked someone earlier that day. His conversation was interrupted and suddenly, the boy next to her was quiet. He had bumped into someone which wasn’t uncommon in the isle. No one ever moved for anyone else. You had to move out of their way or else you were going to bump shoulders. Gatsby learned the hard way of who she should move out of the way of and who was going to move out of her way. She stopped walking once she realized that her brother had stopped too. “Hey man!” Gil said with a grin on his face, like always. “I think I know you.” Gatsby puffed out her cheeks and rolled her eyes . At the speed they were moving now, they were never going to make it to this dinner and even if they did make it, there would be no more food left, for sure. Gil was a happy person, unlike most of the residents on the isle and who know how long he would keep this conversation going with his so called, friend. “No, I don’t think you do.” An unfamiliar voice responded and Gatsby wanted to see who Gil had suddenly made friends with. Gatsby had recognized the four almost automatically and Gil was still trying to convince the man in blue that the two were ago old buddies. “Yes, you totally do. Here, I’ll give you a hint.” Gil motioned between the himself and his younger twin. “Our dad is quick, slick and his neck-” He then went to motion at his own neck “-Is incredibly thick.” He references to the song that Gaston and Lefou used to sing in Gaston’s tavern before he was considered a villain. The song about how amazing Gaston was and how everyone in the town loved him. That is, before they all turned on him after the beast became man once again. Gatsby’s eyesight made it’s way over to the one person that she wished she hadn’t seen again. It was like seeing a ghost, she didn’t know if he was real or not. He was sent to Auradon to have a better life and he was the one who left her here to rot just like all the other villain kids. Jay, son of Jafar. The worst villain kid of all. He still looked practically the same, maybe only a little buffer. Long dark brown hair that Gatsby always loved to braid. She would sit him down in a random chair in Curl Up and Dye and start working on his long locks. She would braid it and try to see how many little trinkets it could hold and how she could twist it into other hairstyles. She always wanted to be able to put flowers into the little crevices of the braid but this being the home to all villains, it wasn’t exactly the best place for flowers to grow. The large arms that often held her when they were all alone were covered in a leather jacket. She remembered how much he loved to show off his arms and thought that they were a symbol of how tough he was. Gatsby always loved to point out that he was tough on the outside and ooey and gooey on the inside. Along with Jay was Carlos, Evie and King Ben out of all people. Decked out in what seemed to Gatsby to be a matching outfit with Evie. Gatsby had guessed that Evie was the one to dress the young king up to travel to the island. She remembered all the time Evie tried to dress her up too, in either way too much leather or dark dresses that seemed to be fit for a princess instead of Gatsby. She didn’t think she would see the three of them again. They were supposed to stay in Auradon and live their best lives. Gatsby was furious that they seemed to forget about her after they went to the prep school but what she was more furious was how much her heart seemed to yearn for Jay. She had taught herself to not care about men after she was done with them. After all, romance was usually frowned upon on the isle but Jay was her longest relationship that she managed to keep. Not only that, but he was her first love. Gatsby had noticed the poster behind the group. It was referencing to the Cotillion that was supposed to be taking place in a few days. She had no idea what a cotillion actually was but the news made it seem that it was just some sort of super fancy dance. The drawing was of King Ben with his love, Mal by his side but somebody had spray painted over the drawing. The black spray paint read about how Mal was this princess and she had become a good girl ever since Ben’s coronation where the four had chosen good over evil. They obviously didn’t want to have any fun in their lives anymore if they chose good. Elbowing Gil in the ribs, she pointed to the poster behind the four. “Does he look familiar now?” She asked him after nodding her head to Ben. She made eye contact with Jay just in time for her to see him looking at her with a pleading look. Well, if he wanted to choose good, that didn’t mean that she had to choose good. He wasn’t her boyfriend anymore and he hadn’t been for the last six months. Him returning, whether it be temporary or permanent, was not going to affect Gatsby in any way. And that was one of the most convincing lies she had told herself in a long time. “Oh!” Gil gasped, his smile growing, as he put two and two together. “You’re King Ben!” He pointed to the boy who tried to mask his appearance with a midnight blue leather jacket and matching beanie. Gatsby started to pull Gil away before he could make anymore noise. She knew how hated the four that were sent to Auradon were here and how even more hated Ben seemed to be. If everyone in the marketplace were to find out that these students were back in the isle, it wouldn’t end up well. “The dinner, Gil.” She gritted between her teeth, pulling on the boy’s beefy bicep. To Gatsby, it seemed to her that she had been trying to get Gil to this stupid dinner for an hour. The things she does for her family. As the twins went one direction and the group of four went the other way, Gatsby shot one more look over her shoulder. She was met with another pair of eyes staring at her. Jay, the biggest one of their group was pushing the rest of them farther into the marketplace. She knew where they were going to, Mal’s hangout. When they were all together and Gatsby was part of their crew, they would often spend all their time together there. Memories ran through Gatsby’s brain as she remembered all the times they spent there together. As Evie used Gatsby as a model on one of her ridiculous fashion choices that Gatsby could never pull off or the first time Mal let her spray paint something on the wall and she decided to spray paint a red heart in a small corner with the initials G and J next to it. Mal could only look at her two friends with disgust, wondering what the two ever thought was amazing about falling in love. Grabbing the can from the girl’s hand, Mal told Gatsby that she was losing her villainous touch and Gatsby could only respond with loud giggles. Everything was so much more simpler back then. They were just rebels without a cause.

[travelingtheusa]

FLORIDA

5 Mar 2020 (Thu) – We drove into Panama City for lunch at Los Antojitos Mexican Restaurant.  It was excellent!  The chips were light and crispy, the margaritas were delicious, and the food was very flavorful and filling.  We took leftovers home.  

     After lunch, we drove to Panama Beach City and enjoyed a flight at the Panama City Beach Winery.  It is the only certified fruit winery in the U.S.  We bought 3 bottles of wine and some items as gifts.  Afterward, we drove around looking at the historic district. Panama City Beach was on the edge of the hurricane and only suffered light damage.  On the way back to the campground, we stopped for fuel and then shopped for groceries at WalMart.

 4 Mar 2020 (Wed) – We packed up and left Perry at 9:15 a.m.  It was a 3 hour drive to Panama City on route 98 along the coastline.  When we got to Port St. Joe and Mexico Beach, we saw devastation from Hurricane Michael, a category 4 storm that hit the area in October 2018.  There are still many houses with severe damage, tarps covering buildings, and scores of broken and downed trees.  It brought back memories of Super Storm Sandy.  That was awful.  I imagine this storm was, too.  

     We arrived at Tyndall AFB FamCamp Raptor Ranch Campground at 2 p.m. (actually, 1 p.m. with the time change).  We saw that the base had also suffered hurricane damage.  The base housing had been destroyed and many of the soldiers are camping here in the campground.  We got a space in overflow.  Even though it has full hookups, the sites are very tight.  We will only be here 2 nights.

     After set up, we drove to Wewahitchka for lunch at the Reel Time Fishers. Paul got breaded crab claws that turned out to be mostly corn meal.  It was terrible.  I had a bang bang shrimp basket with only six shrimp in it.  Good but not enough.

 3 Mar 2020 (Tue) – We packed up, dumped, and left Homosassa at 9:15 a.m.  The drive was uneventful and we arrived in Perry at 1:00 p.m.   We are camped on the grass next door to the Elks Lodge.  The lodge didn’t open until 4 p.m.  When we went in to pay, there was only the bartender – an old woman who couldn’t hear very well.  There are two more RVs parked out here with us.  They have electric and water hookups and a dump station.  

     We spent the afternoon calling campgrounds, trying to line up our next set of places to stay.  Several were full and we discovered that next week is spring break.  We finally got the next two stops secured.  We have to find a third and then we’ll be in Atlanta, GA.

 2 Mar 2020 (Mon) – We did the laundry today.  While the clothes were washing, we walked next door and wandered up and down the aisles of Harbor Freight.  Picked up a few things.

     We went over to visit with my cousin, Larry, and his sister, Lori. I got information for the family tree. It’s sad when families fall apart. Larry hasn’t talked with his two daughters for years.  He couldn’t tell me their husbands’ names or the names and dates of their children. Lori was in the same situation. In addition, they haven’t been in touch with their brother and sister either.  

 1 Mar 2020 (Sun) – We went to lunch at Fat Daddy’s Road House. It seemed to be the local hangout. There were two sheriff’s cars parked outside.  The place was pretty full inside although there were seats out on the patio that we couldn’t see.  There was only one waitress handling about 17 tables.  While she was very busy, she did not appear to be rushed or frazzled.  She handled everything with great attentiveness and got everything right.  The food was good and reasonably priced.

    After lunch, we picked up groceries at Winn Dixie.  Paul made a quick stop at Home Depot to pick up some parts to fix his lounge chair. The cable that pulls the foot rest out broke and he is going to rig up a replacement cable.  Mr. Fixit at work.  lol.

29 Feb 2020 (Sat) – We went to WalMart to pick up some groceries then to the Biscuit Barn for lunch.   I had a vegetable omelet with hash browns and rye toast.  Paul enjoyed a gravy on biscuit and a sausage biscuit.  The portions were very big.  We enjoyed the meal very much.

     I have been trying to get hold of a cousin in Crystal River.  The first attempts did not go through.  Since it was the day after heavy thunderstorms, I assumed the lines were out.  On the next day, the call went through and I left a message on the answering machine. Today, I tried again and my cousin, Larry, finally answered.  He is going to see if he can get hold of his sister, Laurie, and we will get together tomorrow.

 28 Feb 2020 (Fri) – I returned the remote control to the office this morning.  When we checked in, I got a clicker (with a $40 refundable deposit) for the gate. They lock it at 10 p.m. each night. They gave the deposit back.

     We packed up and left KARS Park at 9:40 am.  The traffic (as usual) was heavy.  It was almost four hours to Homosassa.  We are camped at Moose Lodge 2013.  They have four sites on the side of the building with 50-amp and water hookups. They say they have a dump site. That would be very convenient.  

     We went into the lodge to get lunch and pay for camping.  The kitchen doesn’t open until 5 pm.  We got a pretzel and drinks.  Camping is just $20 a night.  Good deal.  (KARS was only $10 a night)

 27 Feb 2020 (Thu) – It was a busy day today.  We went into Cocoa for lunch and ate at Pub Americana. It was an interesting building with a somewhat attentive waiter.  I did not care for my salad or the onion soup.  Paul seemed to enjoy his meal.  Then we ran errands.  Got propane, fueled the truck, picked up dog food at PetCo, and shopped for cat food and groceries at WalMart.  

     At 5:30 pm, we went over George & Linda’s.  We all drove to Brooklyn Pizza for dinner.  The food was good and the compay, as always, as very enjoyable.  They gave us a gift of margarita mix, Jose Cuervo, and Cointreu.  We will enjoy our drinks around the campfire!  After dinner, we returned to their home and enjoyed some time around the fire pit.

     I am very annoyed with KARS Park.  The water went out on Tuesday afternoon.  They’ve been doing construction around the park and we thought they either cut a line or turned the water off to make a connection. We went to the John Tesh concert that night.  When we came home, the water was back on.  The next morning, we went about our business – washed dishes, brushed our teeth, etc. using the park’s water.  Then we went out to run errands.  When we came back that afternoon, we found a note on the door advising that they had broken a water line and NOT to use the water for fear of a bacteriological contamination.  WTF??? Why did they wait so long?  We used the water to cook, do dishes, brush, and so on.  We could have been terribly infected if there was something in the water.  I called the office and was told they won’t know anything until tests come back on Friday.

26 Feb 2020 (Wed) – My medicine arrived at George’s business today so we drove over there to pick it up.  We all drove to Jabbers Bar & Grill for lunch.  Paul and I enjoyed a salad and pizza.  When we got back to the shop, we found another package that I ordered had arrived.  It was goat’s milk for Bonnie.  Her diarrhea has stopped but the goat’s milk will help in the future.

     At dinnertime, we met George & Linda at Preachers Bar where they were offering a wine bar for $10 from 6 to 8 p.m.  We ordered meals and drank wine till we were full.

     The medication I am on has changed my hair.  Instead of the thin, wispy old lady hair I had, I now had thicker hair and curls.  When I pointed it out to the oncologist, he said Imbruvica doesn’t do that.  How can he say that?  Just look at me!

 25 Feb 2020 (Tue) – We went to the Maxwell C. King Performing Arts Center with George & Linda tonight to see John Tesh.  I was not that familiar with him as a performer and was surprised to learn that he was not only a song writer and singer but a news anchor and news caster.  The show was very entertaining.

 24 Feb 2020 (Mon) – We went to the movies today and saw “The Call of the Wild.”  The movie loosely followed the book (they left out the dog fighting).  We felt they gave the dogs too much human emotion but otherwise it was entertaining.

     After the movie, we went to the port and had lunch at Grills right on the water and sitting under the shadow of a huge cruise ship.  Two ships left while we were in the restaurant, blowing their horns and easily moving out of their dock space.  

     We went in the Exploration Tower, a 7-story museum right at Port Canaveral.  A 20-minute video told the story of all the activity and organizations involved in keeping the port going and the cruise ships serviced.  There are certainly a lot of actors that make the port work well.

23 Feb 2020 (Sun) – We went food shopping today.  Stopped at a local coop to pick up a few things, then at WalMart to pick up everything else.  Had lunch at a pizza place.

22 Feb 2020 (Sat) – We drove to my cousin, Denise’s, house who lives about 3 minutes down the road. She drove us over to my cousins, George and Linda.  They were watching their grandson, Ryan.  The six of us went to lunch at Cheddar’s.  They served margaritas the size of small bathtubs.  I had a salad and a vegetable platter of four vegetables.  Life was so much easier when I ate anything.  This vegetarian “thing” can be problematic.  I hope I can get comfortable and happy with it soon.

     After lunch we went to George & Linda’s daughter’s house. Diane and Chris were away this weekend (that’s why George & Linda are watching their grandson).  We took a look around their home then drove to Home Depot where George picked up some weather stripping and a door knob.  He and Paul replaced the knob on Denise’s screen door off her back porch and put weather stripping around her door.  

     When the project was done, we drove back to KARS Park with George, Linda, and Ryan (Denise stayed home).  We showed them around the RV and visited for a while before they left.  It was a pleasant day.

     When we got back, Bonnie had crapped on the rug.  She has been suffering from diarrhea the last three days. Apparently, we stayed out too long and she couldn’t hold it.  I tried to clean the rug but it was ruined and I wound up just throwing it away.  We will have to shop for a new one.  Sheba has also been having diarrhea but at least she’s got the cat box.  

 21 Feb 2020 (Fri) – We packed up and left the Moose Lodge at 10 a.m.  The day was drizzly, dreary, and cold with gusty winds.  We drove 35 miles to KARS Park on Merritt Island.  We camped here December 2013, the first year we hit the road.   They have improved the campsites along the Banana River – put down stone on the river bank and installed new electric and water stanchions.  We parked in a spot back along the woodline.  Our campsite has a 30-amp and water hookup.  When we arrived, Paul dumped and I sat on the campsite to save the space.  Sure enough, someone came along and wanted the spot.  Good thing I held it for us.  

     We had to buy a membership to the KARS Park.  The Park is owned by NASA and was, at one time, quite the place. They had parties and activities for hundreds of employees.  Then, when NASA closed, the park degraded so they opened it to retired military and DOD civilians.  Now, NASA is back in business and they are improving the campground and expecting a resumption of the parties and barbecues.  Ipaid $20 for a membership card and also got an additional card for a guest which I gave to my cousin, George.  He likes to fish and he says the fishing is good in this part of the Banana River.

     The day was unpleasant.  We turned on the fireplace, made soup, and stayed in for the day.

 20 Feb 2020 (Thu) – We went to lunch at Wendy’s then to the laundromat to wash the clothes. While they were drying, we drove to WalMart to pick up water.  While there, we picked out a clothes hamper.  The one we have is very inconvenient to use.  Hopefully, this one will work better.

     At 5:50 p.m., we met Pat & Fred, friends from church back home. They are vacationing in Orlando and we were able to catch up with each other for a very pleasant visit, made nicer by having dinner together at Sweet Tomatoes.  That place is great!

     We spent the last two days trying to find a campground further south and on the east coast.  There are no spaces available at any place!  It is so frustrating.  We wanted to explore the Keys this winter but we just can’t find a campground in that area. Bummer.  We will move to a campground in Cocoa where we have stayed before.  It is restricted to NASA employees, DOD civilians and retired military.  They have a first-come, first-served policy so we couldn’t make a reservation.  The clerk said they are only about 90% full. Campers can only stay 14 days so rotation is faster than in other campgrounds.

19 Feb 2020 (Wed) – I’m baaaaaack!  It was a great visit to New York and I got to do and see everybody and everything I wanted to.  The oncologist said my bloodwork is normal (I go back in 3 months for a CT scan).  I got a colonoscopy and had my teeth cleaned. I visited with my children and grandchildren; my brother, Dennis; my cousin, Claude; and a new cousin, Guy, and his wife, Mary.  Our grandson, Hudson, celebrated his fifth birthday and I attended the party.  My sister, Susan, was kind enough to let me stay at her house and use her car.  Susan is a vegan while I am a new vegetarian.  She made good meals and I learned a lot about healthy food choices.

     Paul and I went to Universal Studios today.  There were a lot of people there but it wasn’t too crowded. We went on two rides.  The Hogwarts train from one park to the other is a great ride.  We really enjoyed that.  Daigon Alley was very interesting to wander through.  The sun was hot and the sky was cloudy.  We left at 3:30 pm and stopped at the Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. for a margarita and snack on the way out.

7 Feb 2020 (Fri) – A vicious storm rolled through last night.  I was wakened about 12:30 pm with winds and pouring rain.  There were warnings about possible tornadoes.  Thank God, we never had that.  But the storm continued for several hours.  

     We packed up and left Winter Haven at 10 a.m.  The dump site was a little tricky but Paul managed to back into it and get the tanks emptied.  It took us two hours to drive the sixty miles to the Orlando Moose Lodge. The traffic was awful.  This lodge has eight campsites; two don’t have working electric.  There are currently two campers here (I think it’s the same two that were here when we camped here about a month ago).  

     We got set up and then ran several errands.  Went to WalMart for various items, got fuel in the truck, did the laundry, went shopping at The Florida Mall, and had some lunch.  We got back and I tried to finish up things in preparation for my trip to New York tomorrow.  I will be gone for ten days.

 6 Feb 2020 (Thu) – It was a light day today.  We hung around the campground until noon.  Went in and paid for two nights lodging then drove to a nearby American Legion Post for lunch.  My member card was expired.  Somehow I did not have the new card.  I called Roby Johnson back home and left a message but the clerk at the post looked my membership up on line and verified I am a current member of the American Legion. We had lunch and drinks, then returned to the lodge.

 5 Feb 2020 (Wed) – We packed up and left Moore Haven at 10:30 a.m.  The drive was over two hours to Winter Park.  We are staying at a Moose Lodge.  There are ten spaces on the grass in back of the lodge with 30-amp and water hookups.  There is a questionable dump station that looks like it would be difficult to get to and on an incline. Eight campsites were full and another RV came in after us. The other campers were welcoming the couple like family.  As we looked at the license plates, most of the folks here are from Michigan.  We don’t know if they are family or friends but they all seem to know each other.

    After set up, we drove to Publix and picked up some groceries.  After we got back and were watching TV, a terrible odor floated in through the windows. Paul was looking out the window and saw a group of the other campers passing a joint around.  That happened three times tonight.  Paul was planning on staying here while I go back to New York but he’s changed his mind.  We will look for a new campground tomorrow.

4 Feb 2020 (Tue) – We had a pleasant day today.  While walking the dog at the campground, three boats came through the lock.  Paul went over to watch while I had a delightful conversation with an engineer who worked with the Corps of Engineers.  

     We left the campground at 11:30 a.m. and drove to Fort Meyers.  It is a very nice town with palm trees lining the main street (Fort Meyers is called the City of Palms).  We found out later that Thomas Edison planted palm trees along a mile of roadway in an effort to beautify the area.  Edison’s wife, Mina, was a great horticulturist and there are over 700 different species of plants on their property.  They’ve counted over 1,900 plantings!

    Thomas Edison and Henry Ford lived side by side in their winter homes in Fort Meyers.  The two of them, along with Harvey Firestone, formed a company to research rubber sources. They were worried about not have access to rubber for their tires and other equipment as the military went to war. They found that goldenrod was the best source.  However, synthetic rubber was invented and their research never really discovered an easy, inexpensive way to produce rubber in the U.S.

     The largest banyon tree in the Continental United States is on the property.  A banyon tree starts with a single trunk.  As the limbs branch out, they grow vines that reach back down to the ground and form new roots.  The vines transform into branches.  It’s an amazing thing to see.  Hawaii has the second largest banyon tree covering one and a half acres (Edison’s tree is one acre big).  The largest banyon tree in the world is in Calcutta, India and covers three and a half acres.  That’s a damn forest!

                                         this is a single tree!!

     At 4:30 p.m., we drove to Rib City and had dinner with SMART friends. We met Alan and Judy on the Canadian Maritimes caravan.  Judy’s sister and husband were visiting from Pittsburg.  The meal was very good.  Afterwards, we all drove to Alan and Judy’s house on the Caloosahatchee River.   It was a pleasant end to a pleasant day.

3 Feb 2020 (Mon) – We packed up and waited for the clerk to fill our propane tank (we ran out during the night) before we could leave.  It was an hour and a half to Moore Haven to an Army Corps of Engineers campground.   It is a delightful site.  Our campsite is on a concrete pad.  We have 50-amp and water hookup.  There is a dump station.  The campground is on a canal with a lock right next to the campground.  The skies are wide open and beautiful.  We are pretty far from the nearest city so we are expecting the night sky to be wonderful.

2 Feb 2020 (Sun) – We drove to Punta Gorda to tour the Muscle Car City Museum.  It was basically a Chevrolet Corvette museum.  There were many, many vets and other Chevy cars on display.  All the vehicles had been restored to beautiful condition.  We enjoyed lunch at La Fiorentina (an Italian restaurant). The place was packed and we had to sit out on the patio.  It was a little chilly with the wind and we were glad to have a heater going.  I had a bowl of minestrone soup and a panini. Paul enjoyed lasagna.  Then we settled in and watched the Super Bowl.

1 Feb 2020 (Sat) – It rained most of last night and today.  When it wasn’t raining, it was overcast, cool, and generally nasty.  We packed up and left the Fun-N-Sun Resort at 11 a.m. and arrived at the Big Tree RV Resort in Arcadia at noon.  This campground has 400 campsites.  The sites are tight but we got in fine.  We have full hookups and will be here for two nights.

       After we were set up, we drove to Ona to tour Solomon’s Castle. It was way off the beaten track out in the middle of nowhere.  It was a destination in itself, not a place you would pass by casually.  Basically, the place was built by a talented kook. The artist used parts of old discarded items to make all kinds of things, including his castle and other outbuildings around the 93-acre property.  Solomon worked with metal, wood, glass, and all kinds of materials to make some of the most interesting sculptures, pictures, and decorations. We had lunch in the Boat in the Moat; a galleon built in a depressed area with water surrounding it.  Solomon built it because he was bored.  He sure had a lot of time on his hands.  

31 Jan 2020 (Fri) – We visited with my cousin, Patricia, today (she is Fred’s sister and daughter of my father’s sister).  It was an hour drive to her home in Valrico, a pleasant retirement community.   She lives alone and uses a walker to get around because of a hump back condition.  Pat was a delight to talk to.  She had a box of photos her mother left her that she did not know who the people in the pictures were.  I was able to identify some.  Others were marked (Pat has macular degeneration in one eye and no retina in the other so she has difficulty seeing things) and I was able to point them out. I took many pictures with me.  I will have to go back to Fred and see if he can recognize some of the folks.  All in all, it was a very pleasant visit.

     On the way back to the campground, we stopped at Cracker Barrel for dinner.  It was a little odd to order four different vegetables and vegetable soup but I am working hard at staying on a plant-based diet.  The food was good but I sure missed the roast beef Paul was eating.

     I got a call from the doctor’s office this afternoon.  My bloodwork came out fine and I was instructed to resume the chemotherapy.  I was a little disappointed.  I had hoped that the week or two I have been on a vegetarian diet would have cleaned up my cancer and made it possible to stop the medication.  What a fantasy world we try to live in.  Oh, well.

 30 Jan 2020 (Thu) – We spent almost an hour this morning calling campground after campground looking for a campsite for 3 nights when we leave here tomorrow.  Finally, one campground had two nights available, not the 3 we wanted.  So, we took the 2 days and extended for one more night here at Sun-N-Fun.  We are coming to dislike Florida very much.  The traffic is horrible and all the campgrounds are packed during the winter.  My cousin said the traffic used to be bad only during snowbird season but that’s changed. The traffic is bad all the time now. That verifies Paul’s story that he heard a news story that said 130,000 people a month are moving to Florida.  

    Lunch was at the Bonefish Grill. We have driven past that restaurant many times and each time, we tell each other we need to stop there.  We finally did today.  The Bang Bang Shrimp was as good as we remembered it was.  The rest of the meal was ok.  Before returning to the campground, we stopped at Staples to pick up paper and printer ink.

29 Jan 2020 (Wed) – We drove to the Florida Maritime Museum at 10 a.m.  It was a small former school house turned museum on the first floor, contained in just two rooms.  There were pictures around the rooms showing fisherman in the 1800s. The museum was mostly dedicated to recounting the days of the fishing village of Cortez.  I don’t think it took 20 minutes to go through everything. There was a cultural center next to the museum but it is only open on Saturday.  We walked through the nearby woods and came out upon a boatyard with a seafood restaurant.  There were many American white pelicans floating in the bay.  We have seen them in the northern states so they must have flown down south for the winter.  So, they are really snowbirds.  😊

      We had lunch out on the deck looking out over the Sarasota Bay and watching the white and brown pelicans.  I had shrimp tacos and Paul had lobster mad & cheese.  The food was good and expensive!  On the way home, we stopped at Publix for groceries and PetCo for pet food.

 28 Jan 2020 (Tue) – We potsed around the RV this morning.  At noon, we left to go to the Florida Maritime Museum.  Unfortunately, when I pulled up the GPS, we found it would be 45 minutes to museum.  That would mean 45 minutes back, leaving us only a half hour to explore the place. We decided to put it off until tomorrow.

     We stopped at the Mellow Mushroom for a pizza.  The service was soooo slow.  The pizza was ok but not New York style.  We returned to the campground, fed the animals, then drove to Bradenton to visit with my cousin, Fred.  His mother, Aunt Tuddie, was one of my father’s sisters.  Fred and I had never met so it was a pleasure to spend time with him, his wife, Marge, and their son, Fred.  After talking about family and what we spent our lives doing, we enjoyed a delicious dinner together.  It was a good visit.  While we were there, Fred called his sister, Pat.  She is the oldest of the siblings and might know more about Grandma’s family than either of us.  Her mother gave her lots of pictures which Pat said she does not know who the people are. I promised to stop by to get the pictures and try to identify some of the people in them.  She lives about 80 miles north in Valrico.  Ironically, we were in Valrico for a few days before going into the Tampa RV show.  We’ll have to go back that way.

 27 Jan 2020 (Mon) – We drove to the Gamble Plantation Historic State Park.  It was an antebellum house built in 1843 by Robert Gamble.  He lived there 13 years trying to manage a sugar plantation but went bankrupt and finally left in 1856.  Different folks lived in the house over the years and it stood abandoned to the elements for years as well.  The Daughters of the United Confederacy tried to restore it but a hurricane ruined the place and they turned it over to the state.  Florida restored the mansion and now run tours through the house.  There were 22 people on the tour – way too many for the size of the house.  It was interesting construction with a hallway down one side of the house rather than down the middle of the home.  The house was built over a 3-year period with 3 separate additions.  The tour was about an hour long.  Afterward, we wandered through the small museum to read the story of the property and ownership.  It was interesting.

26 Jan 2020 (Sun) – Well, we had a bit of an adventure today.  I called the Elks Lodge in Bradenton yesterday to see if they had a campsite available.  They have two sites and the manager told us they were both open.  Unfortunately, when we got there, both sites had RVs in them. We then drove to the Elks Lodge we stayed in Sarasota but found 3 of the 4 sites full.  It wouldn’t have mattered so much except that our tanks were full (the last place did not have a dump site) and one of the RVs was parked on top of the dump station.  I called around to a couple of places in the area.  There was an RV Resort just a mile away so we drove there.  No one was answering the phones but it was a large campground and we expected we would at least find a dump station (if not a campsite). We got there to find the campground to be more of a mobile home park.  It was also gated.  When we pulled up to the keypad, we found there was no call button for the office. You entered the code or you didn’t get in.  Now we were stuck in front of gates that didn’t open and a short driveway off a main road.

     I got out and walked in back to redirect traffic turning into the driveway where there was also a busy gas station.  Paul backed up a little but wasn’t sure he could fit in the gas station (stations have overhead covers, many of which are too low for RVs and trucks). Next to the gas station was a one-way road that led to the back of a Jack in the Box and a Taco Bell.  I walked down the narrow road and saw a sign at the end that said it was the express exit to I-75.  It was a pretty busy roadway, too.  I stopped the traffic, turned people away (they were NOT happy about that), and held them off until Paul drove the wrong way down the one-way narrow road and passed in the back of the restaurants to get back on the main roadway.  

     I finally got through to an RV Resort nearby and found they had one spot available for our size trailer.  It is a huge place.  The Sun-N-Fun RV Resort and Mobile Home Park has over 1,400 sites.  It is a typical Floridian trailer park with hundreds of park models and some RVs.  And it cost almost $100 a night! Ouch.  That’s the problem with snowbirds in Florida.  The cost of staying here during the winter is very high and it is getting more and more difficult to find spots.

 25 Jan 2020 (Sat) – We went to the movies today and saw “1917.”  It had some great camera shots of the landscape.  Long, single pans of the countryside.  We enjoyed the show very much.  We had lunch at Sweet Tomatoes (I really like that place).

     We took Bonnie for a walk at twilight.  I love that time of the day.  The sun has gone down and a purple haze is on the horizon as the light slowly fades away.  There is a stillness in the air.  The daytime animals are returning to their dens and settling in for the night and the nighttime animals are waking, stretching, and getting ready to go out foraging for the evening.  There is a peaceful quietness that enters the soul.

 24 Jan 2020 (Fri) – We ran errands today.  Shopped at Pet Smart for Bonnie’s food, picked up vegetables at Sprouts Supermarket, then went to Publix to pick up “regular” food (because Sprouts is a health food place, it doesn’t carry a lot of non-health food items).  We had lunch at J.F. Kicks Bar & Grill.  I found a lab and had bloodwork drawn for Memorial Sloan Kettering.

 23 Jan 2020 (Thu) – We drove over to meet our friends, Brenda and Rick, in St. Petersburg (near Tampa).  We drove into town, stopping at the Green Bench Brewing Co. for drinks before going to lunch at the Oak and Stone.  It was a fun visit.

22 Jan 2020 (Wed) – The day started out a little uncertain.  I had the UPS tracking number and the webpage said my medication would be delivered at 10:30a.m.  At 9:35 a.m., Paul looked out the window just in time to see the UPS truck pulling out of the driveway.  We missed him!  I guessed I would have to wait for a note from UPS on the non-delivery.  Then, at 10:30 a.m., the UPS truck returned.  He had seen Paul running after him but he had to get other signatures.  The driver also said he was scheduled to make his delivery at 10:30 so he was coming back at that time.  So, I got my medication (not without a little bit of angst).  Now I have to call the doctor and arrange for a blood test before I resume the chemotherapy.

     We went out to a laundromat today and did the laundry.  While the wash was going, we went to lunch at Sabor A Mexico, a Mexican restaurant.  The food was pretty good.  I was a little concerned about being able to order something without meat but they actually had a section on the menu listed as Vegetarian Options.  The food was good.

      At dinner, I cooked mashed cauliflower and roasted Brussel sprouts with a green salad.  I’m still working on a menu plan that’s a little more appealing.  I’ll get it sooner or later.

 21 Jan 2020 (Tue) – We drove two hours to Ocala to get two tires for the trailer.  It seemed like that was the only place in the entire state that carried K9 tires.  I sure hope they hold up.  While waiting for them to put the tires on the rims, we went to Big Rascal BBQ for lunch. Everything was good.  On the way home, we stopped at Winn Dixie and picked up a few things.

     I called Memorial Sloan Kettering to see about having my medication shipped to me.  I’ve been off the Imbruvica since January 10th.  A nurse told me that the doctor wanted to make sure I was not taking Vitamin E with the medicine.  Apparently, it thins the blood.  The refill was authorized and I called the MSK Pharmacy to arrange to have the meds shipped by UPS.  Now, I have to make sure I am here when UPS delivers it tomorrow so I can sign for it.

20 Jan 2020 (Mon) – Paul put a light strip up on the side of the rig.  The RV was designed with a light on the awning.  The only time it works is when the awning is fully extended. You often want to put the awning out just a little or high winds make it impossible to put the awning out at all. That makes that light unusable. The light strip now gives us light under any condition.

     I called around to tire companies today.  We have been trying to find the same brand tires that we bought in Ocala just before going into Disney World.  K9 seems to be some kind of mystery brand.  I have talked to several tire dealers and no one knows the name. I finally called the place we bought the first two tires from in Ocala and ordered two more.  It will be over an hour drive there but I don’t see how we can do anything different.

     At 2:30 p.m. we went to Sweet Tomatoes for a late lunch.  I sure wish they would go to New York.  We love that place.  After lunch, we went to the movies and saw “Ford vs. Ferrari.” It was good.

 19 Jan 2020 (Sun) – We went to the service this morning.  Rather than a minister, they had a young woman with a sweet voice singing hymns.  They were nice but we didn’t recognize most of them.  Also, her voice was just a little too high.  We prefer a bass or alto to a soprano.  But it was pleasant anyway.

       All the Vilano owners bid one another good bye and we left at noon. It was a 13-mile drive to the Moose Lodge in Valrico after a quick stop at the Elks campground to dump.  After set up, we went in to the lodge and paid for a week.  It was only $10 a night.  THAT’S a great price!  We have 50-amp and water hookup.  We will have to go hunting for a sewer when we leave.  The bartender gave us a free drink as new visitors and another customer bought everyone a round at the bar.  We each ordered a small pizza for lunch/dinner.

 18 Jan 2020 (Sat) – At 9 a.m., we met at the Tiffin display and took pictures with Leigh Tiffin. Leigh is the grandson of Bob Tiffin. His father, Van, and he started the Vanleigh line of fifth wheels in 2015.  They grew the line from Vilano and added the Beacon and the Pinecrest models. Last year in 2019, Bob Tiffin brought the Vanleigh line back under as a division of Tiffin.  The fourteen of us took pictures this morning with Leigh Tiffin and Freddie Swinney, Regional Sales Manager.  How many people can say they know the person who manufactures their RV? We never even got an answer from Montana when we tried to communicate with them.

     The show ends tomorrow and we will be moving out.  We drove over to the Elks Lodge to check out space there. Sorry.  There is no room at the inn.  All 28 campsites were full.  The camp host said he would call tomorrow morning if something opened up.  A good many of the campers looked they are there for the entire winter season.

     We then drove over to the Moose Lodge, also in Brandon.  There are five spaces and no campers.  We walked around the lodge, talked with a guy sitting out on the patio, and checked out the hookups.  It looks like that’s where we will go tomorrow.

      On the way back to the fairgrounds, we stopped at Publix and picked up a few things.  Poor little Sheba is going stir crazy!  She couldn’t go out in Disney for 7 days.  Now she can’t go out here for 5 days.  Things will be better tomorrow.  We’ll have to give her some extra outdoor time to make up for her involuntary incarceration.

     At 6 p.m. we went over to the pavilion with our contribution of canned food (we gave 25 cans yesterday and 22 today).  For each can you give, you get one raffle ticket.  With all the tickets we had, we only won one bottle of cleaner.  Each time they pulled a ticket, we were conflicted.  You wanted to win but at the same time, we didn’t want any more “stuff” in the RV.  What a spot to be in!  The entertainment for the evening was a group called Malt Shop Memories.  They sang mostly doo wop songs.  They weren’t that good.  But, hey, they could sing and we can’t so that puts them up there.  Some couples got up and danced in the aisles. Young souls in aged bodies moving to the memory of songs long passed. 

17 Jan 2020 (Fri) – I am slowly getting better.  I have a big sore on the knuckle of my left index finger.  It really got to looking awful and the doctor said I had a bacterial infection in it.  My throat still hurts a little to swallow but it is at least tolerable.  The juicing is a big job every morning. I sure hope we can find a way to make this process easier and more convenient or it just won’t last.

     At noon, we went into the show and picked up a light strip for the outside of the rig.  We wandered in and out of a few rigs.  Looked in on a $2.4 million motor home.  We weren’t really impressed.

     At 6 p.m., we went to the pavilion and saw a show by Matt and Dave. It was a kind of oldies show where the two brothers sang songs from the 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s.  They were funny and entertaining.  After the show, they had raffles again.  I won a bottle of cleaner.

     My stupid watch!  My fitbit bit the dust on its 13th month (the warranty was good for 12 months).  After some kibitzing, I decided to get another watch but not the same make (who wants a product that barely lasts).  I bought a Garmin Vivosport.  I noticed last night that I picked up an extra thousand steps. Turns out the watch was recording the movement of my clapping as steps.  Dumb thing!

 16 Jan 2020 (Thu) – We went into the show this morning.  I bought a clever holder.  It has a magnet on a tab as well as in the pocket.  You put the tab over the waistband of your pants so it sits inside and the pocket hangs on the outside.  The magnets stick together and you have an extra pocket.  Pretty neat.

     At noon, we Vilano owners caught up with one another and had lunch at one of the outdoor eateries.  The sun was beating down hot on us and I sure was glad to finish eating and get back indoors. We wandered through a few Montana fifth wheels.  Our first fifth wheel was a Montana so it holds a special place dear to our hearts.

     We returned to the camper and drove into town to get groceries. Because of the severe reaction I had, I am determined to get off the chemo.  In order to do that, (I believe) I have to move to a vegetarian diet (plant-based is the new buzz word).  So we had to pick up loads of veggies and fruits.  

     After dinner, we walked over to the pavilion and saw Kenny Evans put on a show.  He is an entertainer who performs annually at Pigeonforge (near Dollywood) in Tennessee. He was a phenomenal performer with an incredible range of vocal notes.  The songs were mostly golden oldies with a few country songs thrown in for good measure. After the show, they had a raffle and gave away some goodies (like we do at the SMART rallies).  When we returned to the camp area, someone brought out their propane fireplace and we sat around the fire until 11 p.m.  It was very nice.

 15 Jan 2020 (Wed) – We went into the RV show today.  FRVTA claims to have the biggest RV show in the country.  Hershey, PA, makes the same claim in October.  Needless to say, they are BOTH very large with thousands of RVs on display.  

     Our SMART friends, Rick & Brenda (who live in St. Petersburg), drove over and joined us.  Together we toodled around the rigs and supplier tables.  There is so much out there for camping.  At 4 pm, we went back to the camper where I prepared a big salad, then we joined the other Vilano owners for a pot luck meal.  Everything was quite good.

 14 Jan 2020 (Tue) – We packed up and drove 3 hours to the Tampa Fairgrounds.  We will be here for 5 days attending the Florida RV Trade Association (FRVTA) Show.  We met up with 6 other Vilano owners and were parked together as a group.  There are starting to be enough Vilano owners that we starting to show up in groups.  Very exciting.

 13 Jan 2020 (Mon) – I went to the doctor today.  I am apparently having a significant melt down.  I stopped taking the chemo on Friday.  Called Sloan Kettering this morning and was advised to get myself clinically evaluated.  My tonsils were so swollen and my throat so raw that I could barely swallow.  There is a canker sore on the side and front of my tongue that keeps rubbing on my teeth, making it very painful to just talk.   My teeth have been bleeding and just plain hurt, in general.

     We stopped in at an emergency room.  The doctor (who was younger than my son), followed by an even younger assistant who looked like he just woke up, said my lymph nodes were enlarged, not my tonsils.  He prescribed a mouth swish and augmentin (an antibiotic).  Sloan Kettering advised me to stay off the chemo and finish the antibiotic, then call back to arrange for bloodwork before I resume the Imbruvica.

12 Jan 2020 (Sun) – We went into the lodge this morning for breakfast.  It wasn’t bad and only $10.  After breakfast, we gathered up the laundry and went in search of a laundromat. What a job that was!  The Garmin GPS listed two that were no longer there when we arrived.  We finally found one and threw the laundry in.  We sat in the truck until the wash was done.  When the clothes were secure in the dryer, we went out to find a supermarket.  Again, Garmin sent us to a Stop and Shop that was no longer there.  Ironically, after all our driving around in circles following false directions, it turned out a Publix was across the street from the laundromat.  We picked up groceries, stopped at a GNC for a few things, and found a Pet Supermarket to pick up Bonnie’s food.  Then it was back to the campground where we collapsed.  Being sick makes everything seem like such a big deal.

 11 Jan 2020 (Sat) – We packed up and left Walt Disney World at 10 a.m. dragging ass all the way. We drove 40 miles to a Moose Lodge in Orlando.  They have a small area for RVs.  There are 8 sites but 2 have no working electric. There are only 30-amp and water hookups.  No sewer and no dump station.  We set up then slept for a couple of hours.  We forced ourselves to go into the lodge and pay for our camping.  The rate is really good.  Only $10 a night.  We will be here for 3 nights until we move to the Tampa RV Show.  We ran out to CVS to pick up medications, and searched around for a tire center that had the kind of tires we want.  Paul is trying to match the two K9 ST trailer tires we bought in Ocala but nobody had them.  In fact, nobody ever heard of K9 tires.  It’s making me a little nervous.  We’ll have to call the tire place we bought them from and ask for two more. We returned to the camper and zonked out.

10 Jan 2020 (Fri) – Ugh.  We have both been so sick.  We spent Friday sleeping and didn’t get to interact with Caiden, Miranda or Kenny all day.  At 8:00 p.m. we met at the Polynesian Resort for the Spirit of Aloha Dinner Show. Poor Caiden was so pooped that he basically passed out.  They didn’t really have any food he would have eaten anyway.  My throat was so sore, I couldn’t swallow so ate very little. Paul has a dry cough that’s making him miserable.

9 Jan 2020 (Thu) – Wow! It has been a very busy week.  We went to Universal Studios on Monday, WDW Hollywood Studios on Tuesday, WDW Magic Kingdom yesterday, and WDW Animal Kingdom today.  The lines have been insane (there are thousands of people here for a marathon). We waited one and a half hours this morning to get on the new Avatar ride.  I guess Virtual Reality rides are now the thing.  I found the ride to be very intense and had to close my eyes when my stomach started reacting to all the swooping and diving.

     You really need a minimum of two weeks, and preferably three weeks, to enjoy everything Walt Disney World has to offer. With just a week, lots of crowds, and four different parks, we have focused on the big stuff and had to pass on the small stuff.  It’s still been lots of fun.  How can it not be?  This is Disney!  Tomorrow is a laid back, sleep-in, take it easy day.  We will give Caiden time to really enjoy the pool and playground. That’s probably most of what he will remember about this trip anyway.

5 Jan 2020 (Sun) – It was something of a frustrating day.  Paul and I went to Hollywood Studios intending to meet Miranda, Ken & Caiden at 8 a.m. We got there at 7:45 a.m. and all the spaces on the Millennium Falcon were already gone.  That ride is not open to Fast Pass access so we couldn’t figure out how everyone got a spot on the ride when the park only opened at 7 a.m.  We signed Caiden up for Jedi training (after some confusing directions to get to the sign-up desk).

     The kids had some difficulty figuring out the bus schedule. Kenny and Caiden arrived at almost 9 a.m.  The park was packed and we couldn’t find any rides open.  We walked around the new Star Wars theme area until our Fast Pass for the Tower of Terror opened at 10:40 a.m.  After that, we again wandered around until our lunch at Hollywood & Vine at 11:30 a.m.  Miranda still hadn’t joined us.  She got stuck on the slow bus to nowhere and took almost an hour to get to the park. At any rate, she missed the character buffet lunch.  Kenny took a couple of pretzels for her.

     After lunch, I went to meet Miranda at the ticket booth and the guys went to get Caiden’s Jedi training.  Because I had gotten the admission tickets through the Army, I had to be there with everyone who had tickets.  The agent verified my military status, entered the tickets into the system, and matched our magic bands to the tickets.  The magic bands are a kind of digital key.  It opens the hotel door, grants admission to the parks, and lets you charge anything you buy in the park.

      At 1 p.m., the group of young Jedis (about 30 of them) marched through the park to the arena.  Both Darth Vadar and Kylo Ren fought their opponents as each child was given a chance to personally battle the dark side.  It was cute.

     We again wandered around until we caught the Indiana Jones Adventure Show at 3:15 p.m.  Our final event was at 3:40 p.m. on the Star Wars ride.  It was time to get back to the campground to feed the animals and walk Bonnie.  We parted ways and caught the bus back to Fort Wilderness.  After dinner, we searched high and low for Caiden’s ticket to Universal Studios.  We will be going there tomorrow and I was checking everything over.  We have one voucher for two one-day tickets and another voucher for two four-day tickets.  We will turn them in at the customer service desk for tickets.  We also had a ticket for Caiden which the agent at MWR had warned me to keep safe because it was unplaceable.  Guess what we couldn’t find?  We tore the place apart searching for that ticket but couldn’t find it anywhere.  Looks like we’ll have to buy another ticket for Caiden tomorrow.  Ugh.

4 Jan 2020 (Sat) – We bid Margaret & Rich good-bye and left Hernando at 10:40 a.m.  It rained almost the entire drive to Lake Buena Vista where we arrived at Disney World Fort Wilderness around 1 p.m.  We were checked in quickly by a perky young woman but then had to sit for about 20 minutes because the RV in front of us just sat there.  I guess they were having a problem checking in.  Finally, they opened another lane and let us drive around them.

     At 4:30 p.m. we drove over to the Port Orleans – French Quarter Resort to meet Miranda, Kenny & Caiden.  Unfortunately, their flight left Islip 20 minutes late because of the weather. Then the plane was held up on the tarmac when they arrived in Orlando.  After waiting about a half hour for the Disney Magical Express, they had to ride for an hour and were the last stop of the drop-offs.  In the meantime, Paul and I wandered around the resort; had an appetizer and cocktail at the Scat Cat Lounge; poked around the gift shop; picked up a 2020 ornament; explored the area around the lobby; looked over the pool.  They finally got in around 6:30 p.m.  They got checked in.  We took Kenny and Caiden to the restaurant to get something to eat.  Miranda was not feeling well and had to lay down.  We took Caiden to the pool for a half hour swim. Although the water was heated, the air was chilly and he was shivering by the time we called him out of the pool. He had a great time and is looking forward to more swimming.  We promised to go in with him next time.

     Unfortunately, Disney only brought two of their three bags to the room. At last word, they were trying to find her bag.  It has her medication and other important items in it.  Bad way to start off the vacation.  Bah, humbug.

3 Jan 2020 (Fri) – I did laundry today.  We certainly don’t want to have to do it in Disney World so we washed the few pieces that needed washing.

     We went out and did some errands today.  We put fuel in the truck, picked up pet food, shopped for groceries, and bought a Sun Pass (a prepaid toll card).

     While working around the RV this afternoon, Rich spotted a flat tire. Oh, No!  That makes two and now we have no spare.  So we called around and found a place in Ocala (about a half hour away) that had similar tires to what we have on the trailer now.  So Paul got two.  We’ll have the two on one side and the two tires we have now on the other side. Not the best of situations but we didn’t have much choice.  When we finish at Disney we’ll get two more of the type we bought today.

    Margaret cooked salmon tonight. Everything was good.  After dinner, we watched Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.  We’ve been watching those shows just about every night.  That music sure gets in your head.  Paul and I saw a special on TV last night where they were interviewing Alex Trebek.  We heard how he got started on Jeopardy and where the music came from.  The show was started by Merv Griffin, who (I think) is now deceased.

2 Jan 2020 (Thu) – We went into town this morning to mail off some items and get cash at the ATM. When we returned, we rode with Margaret & Rich to Chiefland where she shopped for gourds.  She makes the nicest animal sculptures out of the gourds. Margaret goes to 5 or 6 shows a year. After she bought about 20 gourds, we drove to Cedar Key.  It was a very beachy town and was quite crowded. We couldn’t find a parking spot so we left and drove back to Crystal River for lunch.  Later, Margaret cooked hamburgers for dinner.

 1 Jan 2020 (Wed) – We kept it easy today.  At 3:30 a.m. we went to the movies and saw the new Star Wars movie.  It was OK but I sure hope it’s the last of the Star Wars movies.  They are starting to become boring.  Margaret cooked chicken in wine with mashed potatoes and broccoli.  Um um good!

 31 Dec 2019 (Tue-New Year’s Eve) – The cat threw up on the bed last night.  The vomit went through the comforter, blanket, and both sheets.  I pulled everything off and washed them in Margaret’s machine today.  It was nice of her to offer.

     We took Bonnie and Sheba to the vet this afternoon.  Bonnie has been having trouble getting up lately and we were looking for something to make her comfortable.  And Sheba has been unusually hungry.  I thought she might be experiencing a thyroid problem.  Bonnie has a urine infection and a slight decrease in the space in her hips.  The vet gave us an antibiotic and something for pain when needed.  Sheba’s bloodwork was fine and showed nothing.  We’ll keep an eye on her.

30 Dec 2019 (Mon) – Paul was up and out at 6:30 a.m.  He was headed to WalMart to get an oil change on the truck.  Unfortunately, he went to the wrong WalMart where they had no auto center.  He then had to drive to the other one we were at the other day.  Four people were already on line in front of him and he had to wait a couple of hours.  He didn’t get back home till after 9:00 a.m.

     We took a ride with Margaret & Rich around the neighborhood stopping at Matt’s house.  Matt was also a coworker of Paul’s at DOT.  He and his wife are having a house built nearby.  They bought ten acres and Matt plans to build a drone racing track. We watched him run a drone through a small track.  That thing sure moved fast!  It sounded like a sick bird.

     After toodling around, we stopped at Oysters for lunch.  It was Rich’s birthday on Christmas Day (bummer) so we treated them for lunch.  The service was very slow but the food was good.  Margaret & Rich went out to dinner with Rich’s sister and husband to celebrate both of their birthdays.

 29 Dec 2019 (Sun) – During the party last night, we got to talking with another couple about New Year’s Eve plans.  He suggested we go to Crackers Bar & Grill on the water.  So we went there for lunch today to check it out.  They were busy and we ate at the bar so we wouldn’t have to wait.  Service at the bar was slow so it probably wouldn’t have made any difference to get on the waiting list.  The food was good.  Afterward, we strolled on the boardwalk in back.  We could see about four boats out in the marina with tour groups.  They were all doing scuba with the manatees.  

     We went in the house at 7:00 p.m. and watched “The Irishman” on Netflix. It was about crooks and how Jimmy Hoffa disappeared.  Interesting.

 28 Dec 2019 (Sat) – We went to Sabina’s Diner for breakfast.  It was a very interesting place with a large selection of unusual items. I had chipped beef and Paul had sausage gravy and biscuits.  Everything was good.  Then we did our laundry at the laundromat.  Margaret yelled at us for that.  She offered her machines for our use.  I felt it would be a burden given that she was having a holiday party tonight.

     We did some shopping at WalMart and Paul checked out the auto center to see about getting an oil change for the truck.  We went into Margaret’s at 6:00 p.m. for her holiday party. About 20 people came.  It was fun.

 27 Dec 2019 (Fri) – We packed up and headed out to Hernando to stay with our friends, Margaret & Rich.   Paul used to work with Margaret at DOT. They have two covered RV spots in the back of their house.  Their RV is in one and we are staying under the other one.  We have full hookups with 50-amp service.  Just like the best campground!

    Margaret made manicotti for dinner. It was delicious!

26 Dec 2019 (Thu) – We went to The Ringling today.  It is a collection of buildings once owned by John and Mable Ringling of the Ringling Circus. There is an art museum (we did not go in it), a visitor’s center with rotating art displays (they had glass art on exhibit), a restaurant and café, a circus museum, and a beautiful mansion.  The Ringlings had called their home Ca’D’Zan, which is Italian for John’s house.  It served as their winter home.  We took two tours of the mansion – they offer three: one unguided tour of the ground floor, a paid docent led tour of the second floor, and a paid docent led tour of the third and fourth floor.  Talk about soaking the tourists for all they can!

     The museum was fascinating.  I thought I had been to the circus but I have never seen anything like what was on display in the museum.  There was a 3,800 square foot model depicting the American tented circus in its Golden Age from 1919 to 1938.  The logistics of the size and movement of the circus is mind boggling.  As a former logistics officer, I can appreciate the work involved in moving 1,300 workers and performers and 800 animals (they were a traveling zoo), with all the equipment needed to put on a performance.  Every aspect of the circus was displayed in the model.  There was the Big Top where the shows were performed in three rings.  Many other tents housed the workers and performers, served as a large dining hall, was used a changing rooms, and allowed the staff to live and sleep.  There was also a large tent where the animals were on display.  The circus could travel up to 15,000 miles and perform in 150 cities in just one season!  Imagine pulling into town on the train (that set up is another story!), parading through the streets, putting on the show, then moving on in just one day. Incredible.  

     After the museum, we drove around looking for a place to eat.  We wound up driving through Keys – Casey Key, Longboat Key, etc.  The traffic was heavy and we got stuck going over the bridge.  Luckily, we found a restaurant and after a little struggle to find parking, we went in for dinner.  The weather was lovely and we sat out on the patio.  The food was good and I tried their featured drink – a Fizzy Cocktail.  It really wasn’t that good.  The check was a whopper $101!  Ouch. Well, we were in an exclusive area.

 25 Dec 2019 (Wed – Christmas Day) – We went over Greg & Potsy’s house at 11:00 a.m.  Their daughter, son-in-law, and grandson were there as well (Kathy, John & Little Johnny).  We exchanged gifts and visited for a while then went over their son’s house. Tim & Brittany have two boys – Sage and Phoenix.  Phoenix was born in May this year as was Little Johnny.  Sage is four and a half.  Greg’s other son and wife, Gregory and Kat, joined us as well.  It was full day of visiting, eating, and playing with the little ones.  It was a wonderful day.

     We left at 4 p.m. and returned home to feed the animals.  At 6 p.m., we drove out to the Sarasota Mall to see the Christmas lights.  The mall is huge and all the palm trees had been trimmed with white lights on the trunks and green lights in the palms.  There is also a large lake next to the mall where they have skull racing. There was a light show along the walkway around the lake.  It was all very festive and beautiful to look at.

     We drove around looking for a place to eat.  Everything was closed.  It was maddening!  Then we stumbled on Miller’s Ale House.  It was packed.  Probably because it was the only place open for miles around.  We were seated immediately in a bar area with the windows open.  Although we had to wait 25 minutes for our food, everything was good.  It was a pleasant ending to a pleasant day.

24 Dec 2019 (Tue) – We tried to find a tire place today to replace the tire we took off the trailer yesterday.  No luck.  Goodyear said they would have to send to Orlando for it and it wouldn’t come in until Friday.  We are leaving then.  Guess we’ll wait until we get to Orlando.

     We met Greg & Potsy and Kathy & John with little Johnny at Gecko’s for lunch.  Their margaritas were terrible!  Their homemade potato chips were delicious!  After lunch, we went over Greg’s to see his new house and visit for a while.

     There is a flock of 3 sandhill cranes wandering the large field we are parked in. When Paul went out with Bonnie this morning, they clacked their bills, screeched, and flapped their wings.  This evening, they just stood and watched her every movement but didn’t act as threatened.  Guess they figured out she is not a danger to them.

 23 Dec 2019 (Mon) – While packing up this morning. We discovered one of the tires on the rig had a bubble in the sidewall.   We pulled out of our campsite and into the parking lot where Paul changed the tire.   I looked up the record and saw that we have about 18,000 miles on the tires.  We bought them in February 2018.  Looks like it’s time to buy new tires.  Ugh.

     We were finally on the road at 9:45 a.m.  There was traffic at some of the chokepoints along the way and it rained on and off.  We arrived at the Elks Lodge in Sarasota a little after 2 p.m.  There is a large grassy field in the back of the lodge. There are water and electric hookups along the side of a Tiki bar.  A small pond sits off to the side.  Just as we finished setting up, the skies opened up and it poured.

     We put up the Christmas tree tonight.  As always, it was a trip down memory lane.  As we travel, we get Christmas ornaments from each town and attraction.  We have a couple of boxes full of ornaments from all over the country.  Each one we put on the tree prompted a comment about the place we were at when we bought the ornament.  It’s always an enjoyable experience to share those special memories.

     At 5:30 p.m. we went into the lodge for dinner.  Every Monday, they have a “Depression Dinner.” It started out a few years ago when officers of the lodge volunteered to cook dinner.  It evolved into a tradition that now has the officers cooking dinner every Monday.  The meal consisted of chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, succotash, and gravy.  There was also pie for $2 extra.  Everything was very good.  The lodge is very nice – large, bright, and airy.  They have something going on every day.

 22 Dec 2019 (Sun) – We went out for breakfast at the Causeway Diner.  The corned beef hash was cooked perfectly!   The place was crowded but we were able to get a seat right away. The food came fairly quickly and was very good.  The waitresses all smiled and were friendly despite the crush of customers in the diner.

     After breakfast, we drove to Titusville to pick up food for Bonnie. Then we drove to the American Police Hall of Fame & Museum.  It was quite interesting.  They had descriptions of famous criminals, and lots of displays of police equipment – handcuffs, pistols, rifles, the electric chair, a straight jacket, a jail cell, fingerprint apparatus, vehicles (cars, motorcycles, ski doo, bicycle, snow mobile, and segway), and hundreds of PD patches.  In the center of museum was a chapel and next to it was a large circular room with all the names of police officers who have died in the line of duty etched on the wall.  There were tens of thousands of names on the wall along with pictures, flowers, and mementos at the base of the wall.  It was very moving.  

     As we were heading home, we stopped at a development that advertised model homes to see.  But the office was closed and we couldn’t get into the homes.  That was a bummer.  Next stop was at PetCo for dog food, Publix for cat food and groceries, and a gas station to fuel up for tomorrow’s move.

 21 Dec 2019 (Sat) – We went to the Brevard County Military Museum this morning.  The brochure we had said the museum opened at 8:30 a.m. but when we got there at 9;00 a.m., we found it didn’t open until 10:00 a.m.  So we walked around the grounds looking at the monuments and then over to an open field where they are planning to develop the area.  By the time we were done, it was quarter to ten and the door was open.

     It was a small museum but jam packed with great information and displays. They had uniforms, artifacts, equipment, and weapons from every conflict since the Revolutionary War.  Placards described various wars and personalities. We enjoyed the museum very much and spent almost two hours there.

     After the museum, we returned to the campground, walked Bonnie then went to George & Linda’s for their open house.  We stayed until almost 5:00 p.m.  It was a long day.

20 Dec 2019 (Fri) – We got up at 6 a.m. this morning so we could watch a launch.  The Boeing Starliner blasted off at 6:36 a.m.  The Atlas V Centaur was an unmanned mission to bring supplies to the International Space Station.  It was a test.  This launch and the next are to test the rocket.  If they are both successful, then we will be able to transport our own astronauts back and forth to the space station rather than having to rely on Russia. Unfortunately, the rocket failed to reach the proper orbit and the mission was considered a failure.  At any rate, it was really cool to watch.  We stood in the parking lot watching the horizon where the trees stood.   A glow appeared on the horizon behind the trees and quickly grew brighter and brighter.  Then a bright light rose into the sky.  It looked like somebody shot off a bottle rocket.  We watched it rise into the air until we couldn’t see anything any more.

       At lunchtime, we drove to Port Canaveral and had lunch at Grills Tiki Bar. We tried shark kabobs, which weren’t bad, along with coconut shrimp and rice.  It was good but the drinks were watery.  The restaurant was right at the port.  Right behind us was a Royal Caribbean cruise ship in the dock.   A Carnival and a Disney ship were docked as well.  There were pelicans everywhere!

     After lunch, we drove over to the other side of the port.  We could see what looked like the Space-X booster rocket on a barge and we wanted to get a closer look.  When we got over there, we found an Air Force base.  The guard turned us away when we tried to enter. He said entry was limited to authorized personnel only.  Next to the gate was an Air Force Air & Space Museum.  Inside was a large room with pictures all around the wall.  Each one had a display about a particular launch site.  There are 47 launch sites around the peninsula where NASA fires off its rockets.  Each launch site has a story about what type of equipment was launched there, who was in the rocket if it was manned, and statistics about the event.  It was pretty interesting.  They even had a small gift shop where we bought items for the grandsons.

     We returned to the campground and took naps.  Afterward, we went over my cousin Denise’s house.  She had a small Christmas party with three of her neighbors and us.  The food was very good.

 19 Dec 2019 (Thu) – We hung around the campground for the most part today.  We ran out to Publix to pick up a few groceries and the liquor store to get some wine but returned to the lodge right away.  We went in to the lodge for lunch and had their sandwich special.   At 6 pm, George, Linda, and Denise met us at the lodge and we had wings and a bucket of beer for dinner.  It was fun.

 18 Dec 2019 (Wed) – We left Mayport at 9:30 and drove to Merritt Island where we are staying at the Moose Lodge.  They do not accept reservations; it’s first-come, first-served.  When we pulled in, we found there was only one spot left of the 15 or so that are here.  The lodge is undergoing a lot of renovations.  They were hit with the last hurricane and are taking advantage to do upgrades.  We stayed here almost three years ago.

    After set up, we called my cousin, George, to let him know we were here.  My medicine had arrived and he had signed for it.  So we drove over there to pick it up.  Later, we had dinner with George and Linda at El Leoncita.  The margaritas were very good.

17 Dec 2019 (Tue) – Kevin & Joy left early this morning.  Ships came and went all day.  We even saw a submarine come in and leave within the hour.  We figured they were probably stocking up supplies.  

     We ran errands today – did laundry, finished up the Christmas cards, went to the post office, picked up pet food at Pet Smart, got groceries at Publix, fueled the truck, and picked up tickets to Universal Studios at the ITT Office.  We move on to Cocoa tomorrow.

16 Dec 2019 (Mon) – The laptop suffered a catastrophic failure last night.  The battery reached the end of its useful life.  It is a Dell where the battery is inaccessible.  We can’t change it.  Best Buy can’t change it out either.  The laptop has to be mailed back to Dell and maybe – MAYBE – they can save the computer.  It is ancient by tech standards.   We bought the laptop 7 years ago, just before we hit the road.  It is a high-end piece of equipment.  We got that because we were going to be on the road and we wanted to protect it from bumps and jars during our travels.  *sigh*  Luckily, we have the new laptop we bought last year.  Now I’ll have to move everything over.

     The gremlins are in the machines.  My fitbit watch also stopped working.  I can feel it vibrating when the phone rings (it is linked to the cell phone) or when I hit my steps goal.  It’s just that the screen face won’t light up.  Ugh!!!  I want to get another one but I don’t think I want to buy a piece of crap.  We only bought that watch 13 months ago.  The warranty, of course, was only for 12 months.

     We went to the Jacksonville Zoo today.  It is a very, very large zoo. Lots of animals were out and about.  All the cages seemed to be roomy enough for their occupants and were clean and well kempt. The mama gorilla was not happy.  I think she is depressed.  There was the silverback male, the female, a juvenile, and a baby.  Maybe she has post-partum depression?  At any rate, we got lots of walking in and the weather was pleasant.

     After we got back, we sat with Kevin & Joy to watch the Navy ships in the river.  Three large ships, a small ship, and a Coast Guard ship all left port today.  The tug boats went back and forth all day long.  

     After dinner, we sat down and wrote out our Christmas cards.  I ordered cards from an organization a couple of months ago.  When we started addressing them, it turned out we were shorted on envelopes.  I HATE that.  Christmas card envelopes are a special size.  You can’t just run down to Staples to pick up more.  Guess we’ll have to buy another box of cards.  Ugh.

 15 Dec 2019 (Sun) – It was a kind of laid back, relaxing day.  The sky was clear and the temperature was a bit nippy (nothing that a long sleeve tee shirt couldn’t fix).  We spent the day walking the dog, kicking back in our camp chairs, and watching the amphibious attack ship depart.  After one long blast of its horn, three tug boats led the ship past the campground and out to sea.  It was cool!

     At 3:30 p.m. we left with Kevin and Joy for dinner at Maggianos. It was an Italian restaurant that offers a special.  You buy two meals – one you eat at the restaurant and the other is to take home. The food was very good.

 14 Dec 2019 (Sat) – We pulled up stakes and left Savannah, GA close to 10 a.m.  The ride was easy and the weather was clear.  We pulled into Mayport Naval Station around 1:30 p.m.  Kevin & Joyce (friends from the Utah trip) were here. They took us to Freddy’s for dinner. The burgers were really good.  I think we have found a new favorite place to eat at.  After dinner, we took a nice long walk on the beach.  There was a sailboat that apparently beached in the sand.  Probably happened in the last storm.  It still has its sails and roping and lots of stuff inside. Seems like such a waste to leave it there.  I am sure that someone with a boat could use that stuff.

     The campground is beautiful.  There are 59 campsites all looking out at the water.  Palm trees and exotic birds are everywhere.  We spotted dolphins swimming right off the shore. Since this is a Naval station, there are several ships in the dock – an amphibious assault ship, a missile destroyer, and two battleships.  When the ships come and go, they go right past the campground.  We were here a couple of years ago.  The ships will sound their horns to say goodbye or hello (depending on which direction they are headed in).  The weather is marvelous!

[theolivechickken]

Spring Break pt. 1

March 8

Bussed to Salzburg airport, snatched the window seat even though my assigned one was an aisle, and flew EasyJet Airlines out to London Gatwick Airport! When we arrived, we spent a lot of time trying to contact Michaela to see if she wanted to ride the train with us into town. While we were waiting, we stopped inside the convenience store at the airport and picked up some salt and vinegar chips (crisps?) to snack on. She made it to the airport not long after we did, but got caught up in customs and passport check so we wished her luck and hopped on the train to head into the city. Helloooo expensive transportation (and everything else in general). We checked into Safestay at Elephant and Castle and unpacked our bags in our purple room.

Afterwards, we had a late lunch/ early dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant next door. We all ordered chicken pho and drank mango black tea with passionfruit boba. Super cozy for this rainy day. We explored the Asian market connected to the restaurant and I fangirled at any food that I recognized. There was still some light out, so we walked down the street of our hostel to see what was nearby. We ended up turning down East Street Market which was nestled in a black community. Several individuals were closing up their street shops, but a few were still opened for business. Aubree went in to see if she could find some natural hair products for her curly hair. Patrick and I continued down the street and eventually made our way back to the crew. He went on to visit Sharon across the river, so Raine and I stayed with Aubree as she excitedly went in to get her eyebrows threaded for a cheap price. Turns out the lady nearly ripped a chunk of her eyebrow hair out but hopefully it grows back quickly.

It was lightly drizzling outside, but the wind really made the rain fly at all directions. We went back to the hostel to rest and try to decide what we wanted to do for the rest of the night. It was a hoot and a half to find a place that sold oyster cards for public transportation. Finally, we hopped on a double-decker bus and rode it to the CLF Art Cafe. Raine discovered the place via google and was expecting live music/ a DJ with some good night life. But it was pretty dead in the area and the art club was located in a multiple story building tucked in an alley behind scaffolding. I guess we showed up too early but got free admission (??) to the art club lounge/bar area downstairs. We told Patrick to come through and waited around for him to show up. It was cool and lively in the room, and then people started moving furniture around to create a dance floor.

Definitely an interesting scene. I kinda liked that everyone was being weird and dancing to some off-brand 80s inspired synth music, but it wasn’t really the scene we were looking for tonight. Patrick eventually made it, but he couldn’t find the entrance to the place. Aubree went out to look for him and they both got stuck outdoors since you needed a wristband at this point for entry. Raine and I went upstairs to try and hear the kind of music the DJ would be playing, and we ran into two girls coming down the stairs telling us “IT’S SO DEAD DON’T GO but you should totally go in with us.” We had a quick conversation with these fellow Americans and then dipped to find our friends.

Chicken Soup McDonald's for the starving soul. We were on another level of being starving, delusional, and overall confused from the whole night, which lead to us dying of laughter in the McDonald’s and back out on the streets to the bus station. Don’t know why everything was especially funny, but I swear I nearly peed my pants from laughing so hard.

March 9

Why do our roommates hate us? They’re so loud in the morning :(( One guy was trying to pack his bag, and the other was blowdrying his hair IN THE ROOM while we were still trying to sleep. Oh well, I guess it got us to wake up and start our day. Hopped on the tube from Elephant and Castle and took it to Borough. Super excited to stroll through Borough Market for some free samples and street food! I love the hustle and bustle of this big city, and I absolutely love markets. Patrick and I got some hot tea with ginger, and Raine and I got prawn wraps. They did not hold back on the shrimp either. It wasn’t one of those sad seafood wraps where they throw in two pieces of shrimp and call it seafood. NAH. Oodles and oodles of shrimp (with lettuce and sweet-spicy Thai sauce) piled into this warm tortilla heaven. Also got some fresh cherries to share (which reminded me of home and the cherries that my Lola always puts out on the table).

Next, we rode the tube to Buckingham Palace. Our stop was right at Green Park, so we made ourselves comfy on the muddy grass (rip my jeans but I managed to save them by rubbing out the mud with saliva) before walking to the Palace to meet up with Amy and her roommate Victoria. We shared the cherries and sat in the company of some good ol’ Beatles tunes.

AMYYYY wow I missed you. We had fun walking around with our new additions to the squad. At the park, we squared up with a GIANT goose and also saw a majestic swan in the river. We made our way over to Westminster Abbey and Big Ben (but rip Ben since he's under construction till 2021). Aubree and Raine went back towards the hostel to meet up with Ollie and Tom (the Londoners we met in Prague). Meanwhile, Patrick, Amy, Victoria, and I spotted a telephone booth, a guard on horseback, and a police squad investigating a suspicious car. We paused by the London Eye and ventured out to the London Tower and London Bridge. The bridge was really neat! The floor had a section made out of glass, so you could see the traffic driving through underneath. Trippy.

We made our way back to Borough and had dinner at Honest Burger - honestly one of the best burgers and rosemary fries I've ever eaten. We all went back to our own hostels to rest for a bit before going back out to meet Aubree, Raine, Tom, and Ollie at Spoons. Later, Pat and I walked through Chinatown and joined Sharon, birthday girl Madison, and Michaela and her Redlands volleyball friends at O’Neills. Perks of being small at the club: no perks. Just elbows to your face or drinks nearly spilled on you, and you're too short to see anything half the time. All in all though it was a fun night, and then Sharon lost her phone so the mood turned sour. BUT then the girls found her phone since someone turned it in! It was a wild rollercoaster ride. We all walked to the tube and went our separate ways. Our connecting metro was closed, so Pat and I ended up walking the rest of the way to our hostel through the light rain and a quiet neighborhood.

March 10

Aubree and Raine came back to the room at 4am to discover Christmas music being blasted on Pat's phone and me drowning out the sound with my snore. Morning came with a hot mess and a crime scene: we think Pat's phone was stolen by the girl who slept in the bunk above Aubree and checked out early that morning. She also managed to leave her red panties in place of Pat’s phone. Weird flex, but okay. Pat was bummed, but he also handled the situation really well. We still went out to brunch at Spoons with Sharon and tried an English Breakfast. Unpopular opinion but it was kinda bland and sad.

Holy wind batman. Almost Vienna status but not as cold. Pat and I went to the British Museum and literally traveled through time and history. People are amazing and crazy and how did we manage to come so far in such a quick span of time? We viewed so many arts and artifacts in the 3 hours that we were stuck in a time machine. My feet are feeling it man but I'm still out here having a good time.

Took the Tube to Camden Market to meet Aubree, Raine, Matt, Cousin Sam, Jack, Will, and Milky. We went to a bar that had a DOG! And tried the somewhat citrusy Punk IPA. We also went to the Blues Bar for burgers and live music. Had a great time hanging out with this jolly group of guys. At one point, Milky was telling us the story of how he saved his fish that was swimming upside-down. The trick? "I feed my fish peas. But not a whole pea cause that’s too much.” Someone please test this out and let me know if this is true.

March 11

Checked out of Safestay Elephant and Castle and went down the street to Bagel King for breakfast. It’s definitely not not what we thought it would be. The bagels were weirdly fluffy and the cream cheese just didn’t seem right.. But the mango-guava juice was pretty tasty. Patrick and I said our goodbyes to Aubree and Raine, and headed to to the train station. We managed to pool our our coins together for one ticket (how was it exact??? AMAZING luck) and then paid for another with a card. Yay for getting rid of the pounds in my pocket.

Things seemed to be working out, but the train we needed to be on was delayed. Actually, all the trains are delayed??? We rushed to find a platform with a train that would take us towards Gatwick. Hopped on one train which detoured to East Croydon and hoped for the best. The cards were in our favor and the time was too since we had plenty to check in, get through security, and even eat lunch at Nando’s.

Barcelona we're coming for you :)))

So we arrived in the evening and waited around for Pat's bag to finally roll out to baggage claim. Managed to catch the sun setting as we rode the bus into the city. Barcelona makes me feel like I'm back home in LA. Maybe because of the smog, traffic, and large open freeways, or the desert scenery, trees, and beach?

Walked from La Plaza de Catalunya to HelloBCN Hostel. Hello major tourist street with people trying to sell you random souvenirs. Poor Pat has reached his limit. Apparently our hostel reservation never went through. Luckily the reception guy was really cool and they still had two beds open for us to stay for our planned days.

Stressed, but he still had the spirit to go out into the city for some food. We found a casual restaurant nearby that had tapas. Not the dinner I was really expecting, but it was still fun to try some tapas. We had Patatas Bravas (basically french fries with a creamy spicy dipping sauce), chips and guacamole, and Moroccan chicken skewers to share.

[meepface]

Evens for the ask thing!

thank you this was fun and extremely time consuming (which is good because i have nothing to do ever)!!

200: My crush’s name is:

Caitlin!!

198: I am really:

gay

196: My eye color is:

green

194: My ring size is:

uhhh @ caitlin: mine is a 5 right

192: I am allergic to:

shrimp i think, possibly red wine also, the fake metal they put in earrings, cedar pollen, also i’m lactose intolerant which i’m assuming counts here

190: My 1st job was:

TCBY frozen yogurt

188: My bed is:

the only place i can really fall asleep and Stay asleep

186: My best friend:

is the cutest look at us!!

184: Xbox or ps3:

xbox but i’ve never played ps3 so i’m biased

182: In my pockets:

they are empty

180: Marriage is:

not something i Need but if my partner wants it i will get married, i just don’t believe i need to get married to be committed to someone for life. it’s just never been as big of a deal to me as it is to most people but i would marry Caitlin in a heartbeat

178: My mom:

is the kindest most accepting and supportive person i know!! she is so great i love my mom look at her

176: Last YouTube video watched:

i sort of started this one by Miles Mckenna but i stopped to do this lmao

174: Do you have any siblings?

one brother!

172: Are you taller than your mom?

no

170: What did you do yesterday?

yesterday i worked until 3 and then visited Caitlin and then went home and saw my family for a bit and then went back to visit Caitlin at her work again until she got off and then her and i went and got a cinnabon and she talked to my boss about getting a job at my work and he basically interviewed her and guaranteed her the job on the spot and then i took her to dairy queen so she could get a blizzard and then we kissed a lil and went home!! a good day

[ I Believe In ]

168: Luck:

yeah i guess

166: Yourself:

honestly?? yes i have really started to!!!

164: Heaven:

idk i like to think it’s real but i feel like i logically think it isn’t but i also feel like who knows you know

162: God:

i believe there’s probably some sort of God but i don’t necessarily identify with really any religion and never really have so i think sure there’s probably something up there helping us out but who knows what lmao just be good to people and respect everyone’s beliefs and we’ll find out later

160: Soul mates:

i don’t believe everyone has just one i think everyone has multiple soulmates in multiple different fields (like platonic, romantic, etc) and i think that everyone has several people in each field that they could really click with like idk i refuse to believe there’s only one soulmate for everyone and too bad if you don’t find them

158: Gay Marriage:

absolutely. this is just common sense. i’m not big into the concept of marriage but i know damn well i don’t want that right taken from me if i choose to marry

156: Orbs:

idk no tbh 

[ This or That ]

154: Hugs or Kisses:

uhh i love both a lot but i’m always down for hugs n cuddles

152: Phone or Online:

online??

150: Blondes or Brunettes:

i’ve always liked brunettes but then Caitlin came along and changed the whole damn game for me so now i really don’t know. blondes but like, only Caitlin and nobody else

148: Summer or winter:

winter

146: Chocolate or vanilla:

boring, give me mint chocolate chip

144: Oranges or Apples:

oranges

142: McDonalds or Burger King:

i don’t really care for either but burger king i guess bc their chicken fries are good

140: Mac or PC:

mac just bc i’m so far up apple’s ass

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor:

sweet and poor lol? 

136: Hillary or Obama:

obama

134: Singing or Dancing:

i like to sing because sometimes i can sing well and whenever i dance i look like an embarrassing dad chaperoning a middle school dance but trying to be cool and dancing along

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks:

who

130: Wal-Mart or Target:

target is my second home

128: Manicure or Pedicure:

manicure ig

126: Your Birthday or Christmas:

christmas!! i love givin people gifts

124: Disney or Six Flags:

six flags

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War:

stop (but sometimes it’s necessary)

120: Gay Marriage:

again, it’s common sense lol marriage is for everyone who wants to get married

118: Abortion:

it’s the person with the uterus’ choice

116: Reality TV:

i dig it ngl

114: Back stabbers:

dumb

112: Facebook:

it’s nice but people who use it excessively are obnoxious and people who excessively share/comment their opinions on it are also obnoxious. take a break live offline a little

110: My Neighbors:

i have nice neighbors one of them is wealthy because he’s the drummer of a famous christian band so they’re always either throwing parties of out of the country and then my other neighbor lives alone with her annoying dog Chewy who roams the roads of our neighborhood and chases cars and almost dies and then my Other neighbors have an annoying ass kid named Sabrina who set loose one of my pet bunnies when i was little and i never forgave her. also one of my neighbors used to have a meth lab here but he got caught 

108: Designer Clothes:

rock those clothes if you can afford them

106: Sports:

i don’t get into them but i don’t hate them either. i used to want to be in softball or tennis or basketball when i was in high school but i never tried out

104: The future:

bring it on (gently)

[ Last time I ]

102: Last time you ate:

i had some froyo about two hours ago

100: Cried in front of someone:

i cried in front of my therapist a little last Wednesday

98: Took a vacation:

my family and i went to NYC for a few days right before Christmas last year

96: Changed a diaper:

i never have honestly

94: Went to a wedding:

oh man it’s been years but it was my cousin’s wedding and he has two kids now and my other cousin got way too drunk and disappeared from the reception and we found her at a starbucks eating dried fruit that she bought

92: Got a piercing:

forever ago BUT i think i’m finally going to pierce my ears for the second time on Friday!! i hope i stop talking about it and actually do it

90: Texted: 

i texted Caitlin like 20 minutes ago and i need to text her back but i keep doing this (sorry babe i love u i see ur texts give me just a minute ok)

[ MISC ]

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is:

my brother, my dogs, my parents, the comfort of my comfy bed and my big room, my dad’s cooking, no neighbors close by so it’s always nice & quiet

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most:

figuring out what i want in my life and getting myself there, my music fest this summer, pride, my friend’s 21st bday, seeing my girlfriend tomorrow, learnin how to love myself even more, therapy next wednesday (no particular order)

84: People call me:

elyse, that ginger girl

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket:

i have not!! one time a cop pulled me over when i was going 10 over with Caitlin in the car and my insurance was months expired and he asked where we were going and we had to tell him we were just going mini golfing. he set me free with just a warning

80: The first person i talked to today was:

well i texted Caitlin first thing in the morning but i spoke to my mom, so

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from:

Caitlin probs, she can always tell when something’s wrong

76: Right now I am talking to:

well i would be talking to Caitlin if i would pause this for a second to text her back (i am so sorry babe i am on a roll please forgive me)

74: I have/will get a job:

i have a job at TCBY frozen yogurt right now but i am planning to get a second job (maybe at target or petsmart?) and test it out and use TCBY as my fallback just in case they don’t work. TCBY is such a chill happy job so i don’t wanna give it up quite yet. plus i get employee of the month all the time because my boss loves me, sooo

72: Today:

i had work until 4 and i was super duper productive so that felt really great!! i got a compliment from a customer and my boss!! and i made $7 in tips which was a lot considering how slow it was!! and then i visited Caitlin for like 5 minutes maybe and then i went to therapy and got froyo at menchie’s with my mom and then came home it was a good day!!!

70: Next Weekend:

i have no plans that i’m aware of yet. i am probably working though

68: The worst sound in the world:

a fork or knife scraping against a plate. my entire body shivers

66: People that make you happy:

caitlin, my mom, all my friends, my brother, my dad, my grandma, a few of my coworkers, my regular who always compliments my eyebrows, the guy who makes me breakfast tacos at this food trailer nearly every morning, my internet friends, my therapist

64: My friends are:

so great and supportive and positive. i love all of em so much

62: My School:

its so nice!!!! it was great going from a high school in an all white conservative small town in texas to a very diverse and liberal and happy college. i love it there and the campus is beautiful and i’ve made so many lovely supportive friends and i see my girlfriend every day!! and my classes have all been good (except modern biology 1300)

60: I lose all respect for people who:

are ignorant and disrespectful to others for no good reason, people who are rude to their waiters, people who can’t seem to mind their own business, people who slut shame, people who are racist/homophobic/xenophobic/etc,

58: Your hair color is:

red !! look at how cute i am 

56: Favorite web site:

runescape HIGHKEY

54: The worst pain I was ever in was:

physical was probably when something was seriously fucked with my stomach last year and it was Cramping and the doctor said it was a stomach bug but it felt like i was actually dying, emotional i do not want to talk about publicly !

52: My room is:

a disgusting depression cave and i should clean it now that i’m feelin good again

50: Where would you like to be:

with my girlfriend or maybe in iceland (or both)

48: Ever been in love:

currently

46: More guy friends or girl friends:

as a kid i had more guy friends but as i’ve grown i have more girl friends! this bitch learned

44: One person that you wish you could see right now:

my girlfriend !! also it would be nice to see my grandpa and grandma again i miss them a lot sometimes :( 

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die:

i have!! one of my best friends and i are gonna go skydiving after we graduate college so soon i will get to check something off so that’s exciting to me

40: Last person I got mad at:

one of my parents, i think it was my dad most recently

38: I wish I was a professional:

psychologist 

[ My Favorites ]

36: Vehicle:

i don’t have one lol hondas are nice bc i have one and it is nice

34: State visited:

i really loved oregon and south dakota and montana!! california would be nice to revisit because i hardly remember it but i’m sure i’d love it there too. and i loved ohio for sentimental reasons 

32: Athlete:

venus williams

30: Actress:

shit i don’t know probably Emma Stone since she’s my real mom

28: Band:

twenty one pilots because i’m a fake deep emo loser and i hate myself :/ 

26: Grocery store:

HEB (only texans get this like if u agree)

24: Movie:

probably either The Secret Life of Walter Mitty or Silver Lining’s Playbook 

22: Animal:

i love bears and also bunnies

20: Holiday:

Christmas

18: Sport to play:

tennis and basketball and baseball are fun!!

16: Book:

the entire Junie B Jones series

14: Beach:

i don’t have one i hate them all (a beach in Hawaii would be really nice to go to though since the water isn’t like…. gross there)

12: Thing to cook:

i can’t cook don’t get me near a kitchen or the house will burn

10: Restaurant:

Hunan Lion, it’s a lil chinese food restaurant that like nobody knows about or cares about or goes to but it’s SO GOOD and i could eat there every day

8: Yankee candle scent:

shit i don’t know whatever smells like christmas

6: Flower:

sunflowers & daisies

4: Talk show host:

ellen degeneres & seth meyers & jimmy fallon

2: Dog breed:

i like border collies and golden retrievers and french bulldogs

(OKAY I WILL TEXT YOU BACK NOW CAITLIN I LOVE YOU)

[myjaebutt]

#blessed

Yoongi x Jimin [Yoonmin] + Jin x Namjoon [Namjin] Word Count: 3911 Genre: Crack/Fluff Summary: “are...are you…” yoongi has to stop and take a breath. is he even allowed to ask this? jimin stops giggling and stares at yoongi expectantly, “am i what?” “are you…are you an angel?” (or sugamon get wasted af and yoongi suffers. yoongi always suffers.) [AO3]

to say yoongi is done is an understatement. he’s sure his brain has melted and the sloshing sound is from the mush moving around in his skull rather than the soju he’s carrying. he’s also sure the strange smell he keeps on getting whiffs of as he walks is coming from him and not the strange puddle of what he thought was turd earlier.  

the wary and slightly alarmed looks he keeps getting from passersby also confirms that he looks as shit (if not worse) as he feels. he can’t seem to remember the last time he took a shower let alone change his clothes. with a sigh he furrows into his (jimin’s) hoodie and rushes to namjoon’s apartment. showers can wait. right now yoongi needs to get wasted. he needs to fuckin celebrate surviving finals week. namjoon can deal with a little smell.

***

“hyung you have the alcohol?” namjoon opens the door looking all types of clean and put together yoongi hasn’t felt in days, weeks, ever.

“of course i have the alcohol. do i look like hoseok to you” yoongi pushes his way into the apartment and falls unceremoniously onto the couch. he could really use a nap, for like two years, maybe even three.

“two feet too short to be hobi hyung” namjoon snorts to himself , walking into the kitchen to receive what yoongi hopes is some sort of sustenance. his stomach feels emptier than his wallet after valentine's day (jimin is more high maintenance than he ever expected and no this does not make him whipped thank you for your unnecessary opinion kim taehyung).

“i would kick your ass for such disrespect but i don’t think i can get up” yoongi glares at the younger boy who shuffles back into the living room, arms piled high with various greasy and fattening snacks. perfect.

“if you could reach my ass” namjoon mumbles to himself and yoongi really would and could kick his ass but he’s much too preoccupied stuffing his face with shrimp chips. ass kicking could wait till later.

***

5 bottles of soju later, namjoon and yoongi are what jungkook would label “wasted af”. yoongi would care to disagree because he’s fine, totally fine, except for the small fact that namjoon keeps on spinning in front of his eyes and he doesn’t know how to make it stop.  

but other than that he’s fine, peachy, still stuffing his face with shrimp chips and trying to not look at namjoon for too long. which is kind of difficult when namjoon keeps on trying to get his attention to tell him about something his dog said. wait, his dog can’t speak. right?

“hyungggggg are you even listeninggggg” when yoongi doesn’t reply namjoon latches onto his arm and starts pulling to get his attention.

“listennnnnn to meeeeee”

yoongi would smack namjoon for pulling on his arm but all that comes out of his mouth is, “joon your dog can’t speak….right?”

a silence spreads around them and namjoon slowly backs away from yoongi, eyes wide and mouth scrunched up, almost as if he was trying not to cry.

“i.... i don’t know hyung. can he?” namjoon whispers to yoongi, looking all types of confused.

“it’s your dog namjoon how the fuck would i know?” annoyed for some reason he can’t understand yoongi starts opening another bottle. he’s too sober for this conversation.

“should i call jin hyung and ask? would he know?” namjoon mutters to himself, squinting at his phone.

yoongi leaves namjoon to his confusion and wanders off to hoseok’s room, bottled cradled in his arms like a newborn baby.

the stench of weed hits him through his drunk stupor the moment the door opens and yoongi remembers why he moved out in the first place. hoseok; resident sunshine, part-time best friend, notorious screamer in every and all moments of life and the campuses very own...weed king. yoongi doesn’t care for the fact that his friend likes to spend 80% of his week high or semi-high, even though he himself isn’t that big of a fan.

what prompted him to move out in the end was jimin; current boyfriend, has the nicest ass yoongi’s ever laid eyes on, an actual cinnamon roll and notoriously sensitive to just about everything. all it took was one off-hand comment 2 months into their relationship that the smell of weed hurt his head and yoongi moved out the next month (yoongi swears he’s not whipped though you can shut your mouth hole kim taehyung).

yoongi’s aimlessly walking around the room when namjoon pops his head into the room with a goofy smile on his face.

“jin hyung said rapmonnie can’t talk”

“that’s good?” yoongi’s like 95% sure dogs aren’t supposed to talk anyways.

“yeah. hey. hobi hyung said he got a new stash earlier this week. something special. wanna try it?” namjoon has a mischievous glint to his eyes and yoongi knows they’re both too drunk to do something stupid like getting high, but he can’t help it. it’s been a long week, and even longer month.

so without another thought yoongi finds himself nodding along and making way for namjoon to clamber into the room. he gets a weird knot in his stomach when he sees namjoon scoot under the bed. this is not going to end well.

after stumbling around under the bed for a few minutes namjoon tries to back out and ends up bumping his head on the edge. yoongi snickers from his place near the end of bed and makes no move to help his clumsy friend, this is what the punk gets for making fun of his height.

namjoon glares at him once he emerges from under the bed but yoongi’s too busy staring at the box in his hand to mind the younger boy, not that namjoon’s surprised.

without a word yoongi promptly turns away and walks back into the living room, bottle still cradled in his arms.

with a roll of his eyes namjoon follows behind and falls onto the couch, facing yoongi and tucking his long legs under him. he places the box between them and stares at yoongi.

“what the fuck you looking at?” yoongi turns and mimics the younger’s actions and places the bottle in the space between his legs.

“open it” namjoon pushes the box closer to yoongi.

“why do i have to do it?” a scowl appears on yoongi’s face, what game was namjoon trying to play.

“cuz hobi hyung won’t kill you when he finds out” namjoon uses his long ass legs to push the box against yoongi and yoongi’s scowl deepens even though he knows namjoon is 100% right.

“fine whatever” he plucks the box off the couch and swats namjoons leg away, curse namjoon and his abnormally long legs.

he spills the contents in front of him and with finessed fingers wraps up a good sized joint. the whole time namjoon watches him with enlarged eyes, amazed by yoongi’s lithe hands at work and yoongi can’t help but smirk.

***

an hour later and the joint long gone, namjoon and yoongi are definitely what jungkook would call ‘wasted af’.  

yoongi can make out namjoon speaking, some philosophical bullshit about how humans lack happiness because they care too much about others definition of happiness, but yoongi easily blocks him out (the nerd quotes socrates on a good day). instead yoongi focuses on the object in his hand (or tries to, he’s kind of worried why everything keeps shaking like all of those homemade videos taehyung likes to make of his dog). he knows it's his phone, namjoon’s own is precariously hanging off the edge of the couch, but he’s not so sure who it is on his lock screen. it has to be someone he knows, since it is his phone after all, but he can’t seem to place a name to the face and honestly it’s pissing him off. the dude on his lock screen is Hot with a capital h and yoongi is kind of in love.

“hey joon, ya know who this is?” yoongi leans over and shoves the phone into namjoon’s face.

“uhhh…. a-a-a friend?” namjoon stutters, eyes going cross-eyed as he stares at the phone.

“you are useless” yoongi grumbles curling back into his side of the couch, phone clutched to his chest.

“and i quote, ‘it’s none of my business what people say of me and think of me’” namjoon looks at yoongi, a faraway look in his eyes.

“joon, don’t you dare start this” yoongi warns.

“i am what i am and i do what i do”

“namjoon.”

“i expect nothing and accept everything”

“kim namjoon.” yoongi leans in. namjoon gulps. “shut up before i shut you up forever”

“haters gon’ hate and playas gon’ play. mufuckas keep mufuckin all day” silence engulfs the room as namjoon clasps both hands over his mouth, eyes going wide as he waits for yoongi to do something. anything.

and really yoongi could, and most definitely should, kick namjoon’s ass right about now (he may be “smol” as all his assholes friends like to remind him every single fuckin day but all those years of taekwondo weren’t for nothing).

however just as yoongi’s about to make his way over to teach namjoon a lesson about shutting the fuck up when your elders tell you to, yoongi’s phone vibrates with a message notification. and really a message wouldn’t usually stop yoongi from ladling out a well deserved ass whooping but said message is from the totally hot boy on his lock screen and yoongi scrambles to unlock his phone.

he momentarily stops to wonder why hot boy is saved in his contacts as jibooty. like what does that even mean. but all is forgotten when he opens the message and is greeted, read blessed, by a selfie from said hot boy aka jibooty. a blindingly cute picture in which his eyes are closed into crescents as he smiles widely at the camera. yoongi gasps, free hand coming up to clutch at his chest, how dare totally hot boy also be totally cute too.

from the corner of his eye yoongi sees namjoon start to move and turns to glare at the younger boy again, all was not forgotten. namjoon quickly retreats back to holding his mouth and yoongi nods once before turning back to his phone. namjoon should be thankful to this jibooty guy, he practically saved his life.

yoongi’s still staring at his phone when he hears the front door open and a shrill voice speak out, “oh my god it stinks in here.”

another voice, slightly softer, laughs out, “hobi hyung is gonna be so mad.”

the second voice sounds strangely familiar and yoongi turns to namjoon who simply shrugs his shoulders, hands still clasped over his mouth. yoongi doesn’t even know why he bothered. all a wasted namjoon do was quote dead guys.

with a roll of his eyes yoongi turns back around and instantly freezes the fuck up. because right there, a few feet away stands the totally hot dude aka jibooty aka the dude with the cutest fuckin smile yoongi’s ever been blessed to see and he’s not sure what’s real anymore (there’s another totally gorgeous guy next to jibooty but yoongi’s a loyal type of guy).

yoongi looks down at his phone and back up, and then back down and he’s not sure if this is some wet dream of his but he’s totally down. jibooty is even more hot in person. “fuck me.”

and then the most magical thing in yoongi’s whole life happens (well maybe, he can’t actually remember anything before this morning so who really knows, not yoongi for sure). totally hot dude let’s out the cutest giggle ever and yoongi’s whipped af, for a fuckin giggle. he would gladly give up his entire life savings, his house, his parents, heck he’d even give up his cat (if he had a cat) to hear that giggle again.

then totally hot boy strikes again. the cutest fuckin smile yoongi’s ever seen in his life returns, all wide and way too big with his eyes turning into crescents and yoongi feels attacked. his heart is racing, his palms are sweaty and honestly yoongi  feels as if he’s run a marathon and he's not sure if he should curl up into himself or fling himself at the boy (he really wants to fling himself at the boy). thankfully yoongi has some sort of control and crawls towards namjoon instead. he's still thinking about flinging himself into the arms of the boy though. he's pretty sure he could catch him because damn those arms though (yoongi wills his entire existence to not to think of those thighs because god help him he's gonna lose it).

“pstt. joon. i think the hot guy from my phone just came to life” yoongi whispers towards namjoon, eyes still trained on the guy. his heart almost stops when he sees the boy blush and hide a shy smile behind his hand and yoongi realizes much too late that his whispering is fuckin useless if it can be heard across the room.

“omg hyung. he even brought a friend” namjoon whispers, read screams, back at yoongi.

yoongi rolls his eyes at his friend and whispers, or so he thinks, “shhhh joon. they can hear you”

“but hyung. he’s hot. like really hot.”

“well im glad you think so” the taller guy smiles sweetly as he walks over to the couch and sits next to namjoon.

yoongi watches in shock as the guy carefully picks up the phone hanging on the edge of couch and dumps it in namjoon’s lap. he then slowly smooths back namjoon’s hair, still smiling way too sweetly.

“im flattered that you find your boyfriend to be ho.” he says with a smirk as he leans back against the couch.

“my boyfriend?!” namjoon chokes out the same time yoongi screeches,

“his boyfriend?!”

the guy just rolls his eyes and resumes petting namjoon’s head.

“what the fuck” yoongi deadpans before turning to stare at jibooty who’s trying really hard not laugh out loud, and failing miserably.

“what the actual fuck”

“ho--how?” namjoon stutters, unconsciously moving closer to the tall guy.

“how what?” the guy asks, an amused smile on his face.

“how did i get so lucky?” namjoon asks with all seriousness, staring up at the guy as if he was afraid he would disappear if he blinked.

“oh my god. jin-hyung i think namjoon-hyung just fell for you again” jibooty gives up on holding back his laughter and almost doubles over at the force of his own laugh.

“i wouldn’t laugh so hard jimin. the first thing yoongi said when he saw you was and i quote, ‘fuck me’.”

yoongi watches in awe as jibooty, aka jimin, stops laughing and starts spluttering as he flushes bright red. the flush spread all the way across jimin’s face and down his neck and yoongi can’t help but wonder how far down it goes (yoongi isn't a pervert he swears).

jimin’s face gets so red yoongi can’t help but wonder how hot his face would be if he touched it right now. so yoongi does what any sane person would do, totally. he slowly walks over to jimin, who simply watches him with a slightly amused looked.

and then when yoongi gets close enough he reaches out and places his hand on jimin’s cheek. totally normal, yup. jimin jumps slightly at the contact and flushes even more.

“wow. you’re really hot.” yoongi deadpans as he cradles jimin’s warm cheek in his palm. (yoongi also screams internally at how soft jimin’s cheeks are but no one needs to know that).

he can hear namjoon and the jin guy laughing, obnoxiously loud, in the back but he doesn’t really care. not when jimin is smiling at him, all big and wide and yoongi’s heart does that weird pounding thing when he runs after taehyung for eating all his cereal.

“i am?” jimin raises his eyebrow at yoongi and yoongi finally realizes what he said. fuck yoongi and his lack of brain activity when wasted.

still cradling jimin’s cheek yoongi tries to amend the situation. “well yeah. your face is like really warm and red right now. but you’re also like hot, like hot hot not warm hot. ya know?”

a moment passes as jimin stares at yoongi and yoongi wonders if he fucked up with the totally hot hot guy. his asshole best friend and his new, supposed to be old, boyfriend laughing like this is the comedy sketch of the century isn’t helping either.

then something wonderful happens and jimin starts giggling. he fuckin starts giggling like yoongi said the funniest thing ever and yoongi needs to fight his mom for telling him angels don’t exist. because she’s wrong. dead wrong. yoongi is like 300% sure jimin is an angel.

“are...are you…” yoongi has to stop and take a breath. is he even allowed to ask this?

jimin stops giggling and stares at yoongi expectantly, “am i what?”

“are you…are you an angel?”

the room is so quiet yoongi can hear namjoon gulping for air as he tries to stop himself from hyperventilating, and failing miserably. good. yoongi hopes he chokes on air.

jimin’s staring at him, a look that’s so sweet and intimate yoongi has to retreat his hand. he can feel the beginning of a blush spreading across his own face.

then jimin starts giggling again and the two idiots in the back are back to laughing way too loud and yoongi’s sure namjoon’s about to choke any second (serves that asshole right, he was supposed to be yoongi’s best friend wth). but none of that really matters because yoongi is now 400% sure jimin is an angel.

“can i see your wings?” yoongi softly asks, hands coming up unconsciously to grasp at the air between them.

with a smile jimin holds yoongi’s hands in his own and yoongi has to literally stop himself from cooing out loud. jimin has to have the smallest and cutest hands yoongi’s ever seen. holding his hands feel like a blessing. jimin the angel has blessed poor min yoongi’s sad life. he is cured, he will prosper, he will never be sad.

#blessed

yoongi has to force himself to look up from jimin’s hands when he hears him talking again.

“only my boyfriend can see them”

what kind of bullshit is that, yoongi thinks grumpily.

“but...i wanna see…” yoongi grumbles, lips pursing out into a non-pout, because min yoongi does not pout. ever.

“sorry. it’s the rules hyung” jimin squeezes yoongi’s hands in what would be a comforting gesture but all yoongi can think about is seeing some angel wings.

“can’t you like, you know...break up with him. and like, you know...be my boyfriend?” it’s a great idea. min yoongi is a problem solver. a genius. his mother would be proud.

“break up with him?” jimin is smiling at yoongi weirdly and maybe yoongi should know by now that this is a bad idea but he like really, really, REALLY wants to see them angel wings.

“yeah. i’m a great catch, i swear. i can’t cook, but i don’t burn my ramen’s so that’s pretty good. i haven’t graduated yet but i have a part-time job and i rap and people say its good. also i don’t break everything like namjoon. and im like super low maintenance. like all i need is cuddles and a couple kisses a day and im good….yeah” yoongi kinda wishes a black hole would spontaneously appear and suck him away. it would be probably less painful than the embarrassment he feels right now.

“hmmm. maybe i should.”

screw embarrassment. yoongi was getting himself a man. “yes. call him right now. do it.”

to yoongi’s delight jimin takes out his phone and starts dialing.

“get it hyung!” namjoon cheers from the back and yoongi smiles despite himself. he was definitely getting it.

a vibration in yoongi’s pocket startles him and he reluctantly lets go of one of jimin’s hands to take his phone out of his pocket.

“why are you calling me?” yoongi looks up at jimin incredulously. “you’re supposed to call your boyfriend so you can date me.”

jimin laughs before hanging up. “well you see hyung. we’re kind of already dating.”

“wait. are you like, you know, for real right now?”

“very”

“holy shit”

yoongi slowly turns around to look at namjoon.

“joon. im fuckin dating an angel”

“holy shit hyung”

jin and jimin break out into laughter and yoongi whips around to stare at jimin. he’s dating an angel. min yoongi is dating an angel. a totally hot and totally cute angel. min yoongi is truly blessed.

#blessed

***

yoongi wakes up the next morning feeling like he’s been left out to dry in the sun and then continuously pounded in the head with a bucket. his throat is drier than namjoon’s hair after a bleach and his eyes, once he prys them open, feel as if someone's been blowing into them. overall yoongi feels like shit. absolute shit.

just when yoongi thinks it couldn’t get any worse he feels someone stirring next. in a state of panic yoongi freezes up and prays to all gods out there that he didn’t fuck things up more than he already thinks. he slowly look down and lets out the biggest sigh when he realizes it’s just jimin. thank fuck, yoongi really didn’t wanna die today. and trust him, there was a long list of people who would gladly kill him if he fucked up. even though he knows just taehyung and jungkook are enough to kill and dispose of his body without anyone finding out.

he’s just about to relax when everything from yesterday floods back and yoongi groans. “fuck me.”

“wow hyung. you’re really asking for it again” a sleepy jimin smirks at yoongi. and yoongi would totally tell him to shut up, but he’s weak for sleepy bed-haired jimin (he’s weak for jimin in all and every state tbh).

“im gonna kill namjoon and then myself” yoongi deadpans running a hand across his face.

“it wasn’t that bad hyung” jimin giggles into his neck and yoongi can already feel himself melting.

“i called you an angel and then told you to break up with me so you could date me. just so i could see your wings”

“well... it was pretty bad”

yoongi groans. “im never drinking or smoking or even going near namjoon again. our friendship is over. im never fixing another door for him again”

yoongi hears jimin shuffling next to him and then next thing he knows jimin's straddling him and smiling all wide and beautiful and yoongi can’t help but smile back. he never can. he’s weak. sue him.

“it’s okay hyung. you were very cute. i totally fell for you again. total boyfriend material. would date. 10/10”

“oh shut up”

“hey don’t be mean. i won’t show you my wings otherwise”

yoongi rolls his eyes before pulling jimin down for a kiss. fuck hangover/morning breath. yoongi was gonna kiss his angel if he wanted to.

min yoongi may make stupid choices, and have friends who make even stupider choices. but he knows an angel when he sees one, and yoongi was definitely dating an angel named park jimin.

#blessed

[jacobsonofalltrades]

Day 11 - Rice Terraces, Temples and a New Resort

It dawned on us at this point of the trip that we had only scratched the surface of all of the amazing things to see in Bali.  Visitors can literally spend weeks going on day-tours to incredible destinations on the island, be it ancient temples, rugged volcanoes, underwater exploration of shipwrecks, etc.  We had been taking it relatively easy, but it was time for some sightseeing.

We hired a driver for the day to take us to some of the bucket-list spots in the area surrounding Ubud.  We had come to embrace the magic (and infinitely more comfortable temperatures) of early morning exploring, so we started out around 7 a.m.

Our first stop was the almost impossibly picturesque rice terraces of the village Tegalalang.  The secret is out on this one, and it tends to get very crowded with visitors as the day progresses.  The local landowners are no dummies, and they have taken to charging the tourists who plod through their fields on a quest for the perfect photo.  Knowing that we would do the exact same thing in their situation, we had no issue paying the small donations along the way.

The purpose of these terraces is to cultivate rice, not leisure hiking, and the pathways were pretty steep and narrow.  Since I was dressed for temple visits,  my outfit was wholly inappropriate for this endeavor.  While letting Matt walk past me on one of these pathways, I slipped ankle-deep right into the thick black mud.

One of the men in charge of this particular swath of rice terrace took pity on me, and expertly washed off my sandals and muddy extremity in an adjacent stream.  Based on his nonchalance and speed, it must happen all the time.

While I did give the guy a tip for helping me out, I was not feeling a ride on the rope swing he was running.  Instagram is chock full of videos featuring glamorous girls on rope swings over the rice terraces, but I learned my lesson five years ago on a different swing in Mexico.  On the last day of that trip, we were at a swimming hole in the middle of nowhere, and I sprained my wrist on a makeshift rope swing before plunging into the water.  The swing at the rice terrace looked a touch more sturdy than that, but I didn’t feel like spending another summer in a brace.  

Speaking of glamorous Instagram girls, we were very entertained by a behind-the-scenes look at how all those beautiful photos are taken.  In the photo below I was watching a hilarious scene unfolding a few terraces below us, which involved a girl in a flowy red dress playing set director while her sweaty boyfriend/husband/manpanion lugged around a large camera, tripod and backpack full of gear.  Without fail, the girls would artfully pose for a few seconds, march back to their guy to review the photos he had taken, make a face, and tell him to do it again.

I typically play photographer on our vacations, but Matt really stepped it up this trip (aren’t these pictures lovely?).   Hopefully I was nicer to him than some of my counterparts on the terraces.

The terraces are truly a feast for the eyes, but a bit challenging to navigate in soggy leather sandals.  It was time to move on to our next stop.

Pura Tirtha Empul is one of Bali’s most important temples, and Hindu visitors from all over Southeast Asia make it a point to stop here.  The most unique feature of this temple is the natural hot springs, discovered in AD 962.  The water is believed to have magical powers, and priests come to the springs for holy water.  The springs bubble up into a large, crystal-clear pool within the temple, and gush out through waterspouts into a bathing pool just outside the temple walls.  Visitors are welcome to bathe in the pool, where each spout has a different spiritual purpose, but we had a long ride ahead of us and preferred not to spend it in wet clothes. 

Our driver informed us that the large modern house above the temple is where the president of Indonesia stays when they visit the region.  While on the topic of presidents, the Obama’s also happened to visit this temple during their visit to Bali last year.

Our next stop was Goa Gajah, which translates to “Elephant Cave.”  Elephants are not native to Bali, so the origins of the cave and its name are uncertain.  It is estimated that the cave dates back to the 11th century.

One note for women traveling to Bali - women are asked not to visit temples if they are menstruating, pregnant, or have recently given birth.  I had read about this ahead of time, but it was still a bit jarring to see the “no menstruating” signs.

The rock carvings outside of this cave are the real attraction, as is entering the doorway through the mouth of a demon.  The inside of the cave is T-shaped and bare for the most part, though there are fragmentary remains of the lingam (phallic symbol of the Hindu god Shiva) and its female counterpart the yoni.

The cave is surrounded on one side by souvenir vendors, and on the other side by lush jungle and remnants of historic fountains and pools.  Guess which side we spent more time exploring. 

The last stop on our whirlwind tour of sights around Ubud was the Tegenungan Waterfall.  We were very glad to see it, but it was also a real schlep to the bottom (over 200 steep stairs down the side of the cliff).  We felt very accomplished when we got there.

However, that meant we also had to walk 200 steps back UP the side of the cliff.  By this time it was almost noon, and it was brutally hot in the strong sun.  We were overheated, tired, thirsty and cranky.  I stopped into the scenic overlook to try out my best Ethan impression, as my baby brother has a knack for expressing exactly this feeling in the most beautiful places.

The map below is a big fat liar, and it took closer to two hours to drive from the waterfall to our next hotel, as traffic can be very unpredictable and our driver decided to save the ~85 cents on the toll road.  I didn’t mind too much, since I am an expert at car napping.

After snoozing through most of the “rush hour” traffic on the drive south (sorry Matt!),  I awoke to our swanky new hotel in Nusa Dua and immediately made myself at home. 

I settled under a beach umbrella, made friends with the bartender, and enjoyed somebody else’s beachfront wedding in the comfort of my bikini.  Ah, paradise.

The piña coladas in Bali were so refreshing and not overly sweet like they typically are on this side of the world, as they are actually made with fresh pineapple and coconut rather than bags of syrup.

It’s been way too long since I mentioned food, so let’s cut to lunch at Spice, the hotel’s Southeast Asian fusion restaurant.  Whole 30 was a distant memory for me at this point, so I ordered the grilled king prawn and avocado wrap with tomato and avocado salsa AND a heaping pile of french fries.  I also went to town on the basket of prawn crackers (or shrimp chips as I called them), which are commonly found in Bali and other parts of Southeast Asia.  As my dad would say, I’m on vacation!

Matt ordered seafood kwe tiaw - wok fried rice flatted noodles with seafood and vegetables. When I say seafood I mean JAM PACKED with seafood, including mussels, prawns, tuna, and squid. Matt was in heaven and repeatedly questioned how they could fit this much seafood in this one dish.

Matt also was impressed with his first white/green colored mussel!

We had to wait until 3 p.m. to check into our hotel room, and my oh my what a hotel room it was.  When the porter brought us up with the bags, the first words out of my mouth were - it’s bigger than our apartment!  And it was.  Matt’s travel rewards points voodoo magic at it again.

This monstrosity is apparently known as a “Hollywood King” - two queen beds smushed together.  Perfect for avoiding your spouse on vacation ;)

To cap off a marathon day, we enjoyed high tea service poolside.  Matt was new to high tea in general and fell in love with the fresh clotted cream that accompanied the scones. After that, we managed to keep our eyes open just long enough for some sunset cocktails and amuse-bouche, followed by channel surfing on our hotel room couch and an embarrassingly early bedtime.

[golflakeridgegc]

Lake Ridge Weekly Newsletter Jun 26, 2017

Congratulations to Brett Hahn for getting his first ever Hole-in-One on hole #6 using his Gap Wedge on Saturday Jun 24. The 135 yard shot was witnessed by Kori Hahn and Josh and Sarah Kucera. It only took 30 years for the GolfTEC instructor to finally hit the perfect shot. Great shot Brett “ACE” Hahn. Did I mention he works for GolfTEC? Well, if you need help with your game, give him a call on 402-905-2990. Hope you like the plug Brett…

The Junior Clinic continues this Tuesday Jun 27,  at 11:00 am and runs every Tuesday until Jul 11. The clinic is free and is open to all juniors. The clinic will cover golf etiquette, rules, chipping, putting and driving. And mark your calendars for Tuesday Jul 18 when  you can put your skills to work and  play in the Junior Tournament.

The Plattsmouth Lions Club 18 hole 4-person scramble has been rescheduled for Saturday Jul 15. Shot gun start at 8:30. Please sign up in the pro shop or call for more details. This is always a great event so please get a team together and help support the Plattsmouth Lions Club.

The Monday morning Senior League continues every Monday at 9:00. Any Senior wanting to play please meet at the club house every Monday morning,  weather permitting.

Booking a tee time has never been easier. Just go to our new and improved website at https://golflakeridge.com. Not only can you book your tee time online, but you can view all the upcoming events for the season in the events Club Calendar. You can view our menu, order gift certificate’s from our online shop and keep up-to-date with the latest golfing news with my online news blog. It even links you to our Facebook and Twitter pages.  So please take a few minutes to check it out and add to your favorites list.

Come take advantage of our UNLIMITED GOLF SPECIAL. The $24.50 golf package includes all your golf, cart rental and a cold sandwich with chips and is available Monday – Friday. However due to changes with our lunch schedule the $29.50 package that includes golf, cart rental  and a hot  lunch  from Fairways  Restaurant will only be available on Fridays.  Please note this golf special does not include weekends or holidays and all golfers must stop playing at 4:00.  This allow us time to get setup and ready for the evening leagues.

UPCOMING GOLF OUTINGS

JUL 2  –  2ND ROUND OF THE MEN’S MATCH PLAY CHAMPIONSHIP

JUL 15 – PLATTSMOUTH LIONS CLUB 4-PERSON SCRAMBLE / 18-HOLES 8:30AM

JUL 18 – JUNIOR TOURNAMENT / 9-HOLES 11:00AM

AUG 5 – LADIES INVITATIONAL  / 18 HOLES 9:00AM

AUG 13 – RYDER CUP  AGAINST TABLE CREEK / 36 HOLES 9:00AM

AUG 26 / 27 – CLUB CHAMPIONSHIP

UPCOMING EVENTS  

We will be hosting a “SIP AND SHOP” party on Thursday Jun 29 from 7:00 – 10:00 in Fairways Restaurant. LipSense, Skyz Boutique Clothing and Isabel Chloe Jewelry will be the featured vendors. So why not stop by, have a few drinks and pick up a few great gifts for yourself or that special someone in your life.

All you Karaoke Kings and Queens, the qualifying round for this year’s annual Karaoke Fall Festival Contest will be held in Caddies Lounge this Saturday July 1 starting at 9:00. So mark your calendars. This is a fun competition and is open to the public. More details to follow but those wanting to complete need to sign-up  in advance.

We will be having a Conceal and Carry gun class on Sunday July 30. Registration begins at 8:00 am  and the class starts at 8:30 am and is schedules to run until 4:30. Cost is $100.00. You will need to bring a firearm of any caliber with a holster that can be concealed. We recommend a belt holster on the outside of the pants and a jacket or button down shirt to conceal the gun.   Most of the qualification is drawing from concealment, but there are no time limits.  Please do not bring any ammunition into the classroom portion; you may, however, bring an unloaded and cased weapon  if you would like.  Training material and handouts will be provided for the classroom portion.  Also, you will need range  protective gear as well.  Eye protection and ear protection is required.   100 rounds of manufactured practice ammunition should suffice. Officer Brian Hayes will be the instructor. Spots are limited so please contact the pro shop if you would like to sign-up.

Need to plan an event? Well look no further. Whether it’s a golf outing, retirement party, birthday party, class reunion or any social event, we look forward to working  with you to plan and host your event and make it an enjoyable and memorable experience for all. An up-to-date schedule has been posted on our website at https://golflakeridge.com and has also been posted to our Facebook Page.

And speaking of Facebook, feel free to “like” and follow us on the  Lake Ridge Country Club’s Facebook Page. Keep up-to-date with all the events and daily specials Lake Ridge has to offer.  Please click on the link fb.me/BeaverLakeRidgeGolf. If the link does not work, simply cut and paste the link into your address bar on your web browser. Please feel free to rate us and give us any feedback that would allow us to better serve you.  

FAIRWAYS RESTAURANT 

Open for dinner from 5 – 9 seven days a week and now open for lunch from 11 – 2 Friday’s  Saturdays and Sundays.  Whether you want to dine in the restaurant, Caddies Lounge or out on the deck, we are committed to providing quality food at a great price in a very comfortable setting. In a hurry or don’t feel like cooking, call us in advance for takeout orders.

Like breakfast? The Dormant Club meets every 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month at 7:30 for breakfast in Fairways  restaurant. This is open to the public so why not treat yourself to a nice breakfast and get your day started off right. What a great way to start your day, sitting on the deck and enjoying the view of the golf course.

HAPPY HOUR MONDAY – FRIDAY FROM 4 TO 6

Enjoy discounted prices on beer, wine and spirits in Caddies Lounge.

DAILY SPECIALS

MONDAY – CHEF’S CHOICE 

TUESDAY – TACOS TACOS TACOS  

WEDNESDAY – CHEF’S CHOICE 

THURSDAY –  CHICKEN QUESADILLAS  

FRIDAY – STEAK AND SHRIMP  

SATURDAY –  RACKS OF BBQ RIBS 

SUNDAY – CHEF’S CHOICE          

Sundays are Members Appreciation night. All members get 20% off their food order. So come on out and take advantage of your membership for some great food at a great price.   

DARTS            

Darts anyone? Come on up and enjoy a few beers, play some darts in Caddy’s Shack and listen to some of your favorite songs on the Jukebox. And for all you music fans, download  the AMI Jukebox app to your phone and play the jukebox from your phone. Just do a search for AMI Jukebox under your APPS store and download the app. Once you have downloaded the app, select Caddy’s Lounge as your location.  It’s quick and easy to setup.

KARAOKE

We have Karaoke every Friday and Saturday starting at 9:00. However, if you ever want to practice your skills, once the kitchen closes, we can fire up the Karaoke and let the singing begin.

   Todd Berry

Director of Golf

Lake Ridge Golf Course

Phone: 402-235-4653

lakeridgegolf@spiralfiber.com

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