#one of my favorite things about lando is how deeply loved he is

[papayafiles]

i'll believe in you, still your number 1 fan x

(lando norris - the last one by maisie peters)

[ln444]

1D songs as f1 drivers prompts

included: lando norris, oscar piastri, charles leclerc, carlos sainz, lewis hamilton, george russell, max verstappen.

cw: slight angst.

note: i spent days making this omg 😭 i'm so glad it's finally out bc i'm a huge fan of one direction's songs (had my directioner era lol) i really hope you guys enjoy it ! also i was thinking about making it a serie, let me know if you're interested by any of the prompts !

click on the title to play the song!

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lando norris ☆ stole my heart (bestfriends in love)

“under the lights tonight, you turned around and you stole my heart with just one look, when i saw your face, i fell in love„

lando really tried. he attempted to bury his feelings as deeply as he could, but you make it so difficult. the way you're the only one who laughs at his silly jokes, the way you try not to miss any of his races (and send him a good luck text when you can't be there), the way you randomly smile down at him – he could talk about everything you do for hours because he loves and knows every single details about you. sometimes he hates how you make him feel because he just wants to say, 'fuck it,' and kiss you for hours and hours. he can't even count the number of times he's thought about kissing you or the countless times the three words almost slipped out of his mouth out of nowhere. but the thought of losing you forever hold him back everytime, he can't even imagine his life without you. he doesn't know how, but lando has fallen for you, really, really hard and it just keeps going, he just can't get enough of you.

oscar piastri ☆ 18 (teenage love)

“i have loved you since we were 18, long before we both thought the same thing, to be loved and to be in love„

oscar initially watched you from a distance, even memorizing your schedule to see you as often as possible. he'd daydream about finding excuses to start conversations with you, sometimes getting so lost in thought during class that he'd lose track of the lesson. then, one day, he finally gathered the courage to talk to you, pretending to need notes from a shared class. since that day, you began exchanging daily messages, making oscar dumbly smiling. you started having study sessions, eating lunch together, sitting together in your shared classes and he'd even wait to walk you home. and just like that, oscar start falling for you. he found himself daydreaming about you more often, imagining how it would feel to hold your hand and how your lips would feel on his. those thoughts would fluster him, but deep down, he hoped they might come true.

charles leclerc ☆ summer love

“you were my summer love, you'll always will be my summer love„

midnight swims, picnics, sneaking out to watch the stars, late-night talks, sharing earphones while lying on the beach, biking, taking pictures of each other with your old camera, whispering sweet words to each other when no one's watching. that's what makes summer your favorite season, because you get to be with charles. but why does being in love with charles have to be so complicated? why do you have to part ways when the summer ends? most importantly, what makes you hold onto this love, so complicated? maybe the fact that charles always promises to be there next summer and keep this promise — or the fact that you're madly in love with this boy—. the craziest part of all of this is how your love for each other never fades, to the point where charles promises to marry you and get a beach house where you can spend all your summers together when you grow up. charles always keeps his promises.

carlos sainz ☆ change your ticket (long distance)

“you should probably stay, probably stay a couple more days, come on let me change your ticket home, don't go, it's not the same when you go„

you never imagined that having an f1 driver as your boyfriend would be so challenging and that you'd have to spend half the year far from him. at first, it wasn't a big problem, and you got used to it quickly. but at times, it really tugged at your heart. carlos always makes sure to call you when he is free and send you texts at random times of the day to ask how's your day going and tell you how much he misses you, but it's not the same. carlos had asked you more than to join the venture, assuring you that his income would be more than enough for both of you. you thought about it—a lot—but the idea of making such significant changes held you back. now, when you think about it, you realize that losing carlos over a simple matter of distance would be a mistake, especially when there's a solution within reach. perhaps traveling the world with your f1 driver boyfriend isn't such a bad idea after all.

lewis hamilton ☆ heart attack (bestfriend's sister)

“got your voice in my head, sayin' «let's just be friends» [...] never thought it'd hurt so bad, getting over you„

lewis doesn't even know how he fell in love with you. perhaps it was the way your smile warms his heart or how you effortlessly make the most boring conversation so captivating. it seems so absurd that, out of all of the people, he fell for his bestfriend's sister. lewis never imagined that it will be this hard to fight his love for you and act like his mind is not filled with thoughts of you 24/7. how could he possibly get over you when just being in the same room as you drives him crazy? he thought about telling your brother, he really did but the thought of losing his long time friend and you along the way held him back. so he decided to bury his feelings deep in his heart and keep his thoughts in the back of his head. yet, with every echo of your laughter from the next room or just the sight of you, his heart would go crazy.

george russell ☆ loved you first

“i've been waiting all this time to finally say it but now i see your heart's been taken, and nothing could be worse, baby i loved you first„

george can't help but think about the stupid mistake he made a few months ago— not confessing his love for you. he had so many chances to do it, to tell you that he fell hard for you and he can't stop thinking about you. but the day he finally decided to do it, he didn't expect to find you arm in arm with another guy, totally breaking his heart. he just couldn't take it anymore, seeing you with him every day and acting like it was fine, as if the looks and smiles you gave him didn't warm his heart and make him want to take your hand and run as far as he could. because george, he's deeply in love, and it's getting deeper every single day. it's so unfair��� he was there first, he loved you first. the worst part is that you know how george feels, and you might even feel the same way. george loved you first, and he's going to make sure that you know that.

max verstappen ☆ still the one (ex lovers)

“you're all i think about baby, i was so stupid for letting you go, you still the one„

max tried to date other girls, multiple times. however, it never felt the same. how is he supposed to move on when he's consumed by thoughts of you 24/7? he can't even engage in meaningful conversations with his dates because his mind always drifts back to you. he spends countless nights trying to erase you from his thoughts, to convince himself that it's truly over. yet, deep down, a flicker of hope for your love still lingers. max thought about the endless nights he's spent replaying your conversations and wondering what went wrong. he's haunted by the way your smile lit up his world and the warmth of your hand in his. even though he's tried to move forward, the heartache is still here, reminding him that sometimes, love refuses to fade.

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requests open!

[mecachrome]

omg k i just saw ur top 3 landoscar moments post from october 2023... any changes/updates since then? new moments made it onto the list? or if not... favorite moment of 2024 so far? (i just like hearing (reading?) ur thoughts it's like reading an intellectual (but still sappy in my fave way) bedtime story 🥰)

hklsdfhlsfhd naurrr... this is so embarrassing why am i still deeply landoscarpilled 6 months later 😔

but honestly i have been thinking about this and the sheer volume of crasyinsane material and lore we've accrued since last year because now i'm like how would you even begin constructing a top 3....... the possibilities are endless!!!

in terms of pre-october content that i might have missed before, i'd say most of this ask still holds (lando's biggest fan dot mp4 will NEVER lose its insanity to me. quintessential landoscar meta as far as i'm concerned) but now i also desperately need 2 shout out portrait painting challenge...... when it came out i was of course susceptible to the "you look beautiful" bantz though mostly just wrote it off as shipbait and since then i've looked back on this video multiple times and been like ?! why was oscar's deference to lando so insane actually.... i've alr mentioned this b4 but 1) oscar taking lando's intro in stride and immediately responding i am ready lando norris 2) oscar playfully acquiescing and letting lando use purple after he'd already chosen it 3) >like 5 seconds later. "you like purple don't you?" "uhhhh... i can do now" (who says that.) 4) another stunning display of lando Nooticing and fixating on oscar's hair swoop and last but not least 5) the way oscar FOLDS OVER and giggles helplessly when lando tells him i've just done you all pink ??? like. OKAY. cheers

looking @ recent content..... personally i find 814 so fascinating because while there are many Discrete Moments i can point out that make my brain explode i also feel like to some degree the reason we (? or maybe just me. again i apologize for the nonsensical drivel i create) love to make parallel gifsets of them is because they have such an understated dynamic built off many minute unspoken habits and wordless exchanges and essentially Patterns so there is less of like... a need for spontaneous intimacy.... if that makes sense. it's about the consistency of reciprocal comfort... iterations..... palisades palisades......... ok this is totally not related to the ask i've just been rotating it in my mind

anyway 10 personable favs !!! arranged chronologically

finish the lyrics (oct 2023): a deeply obvious one but you can't Not include it 😩 i can't believe this came out a week after i answered that because seriously what da hell. @ OSCAR PIASTRI WHAT IS WRONG WITH YEWWWWWWWW. there are sooooo many things i could mention here that i feel have already been exhaustively expounded, the most obvious of course being the classic ojp Heart Eyes moment(s) (Many such cases......but also specifically the love story one) (like i'd argue silverstone was mostly responsible for getting 814 off the ground BUT this video was when their dynamic became the most "mainstream" and accessible to fandom as a whole... the amount of non-f1 fans i saw qrting reups of that clip!!!!) anyway but then you also get 👉 whatever the inside joke they have about old town road is. oscar saying "i reckon you'd be unreal in a karaoke bar in japan" which i still think is such a Line... just me ??? the way he verryryryyyy softly sings "yes" with lando at the end of their love story karaoke and the insane camera angle of him just out of focus. like. really in general there is just such a soft and lighthearted and Fun air to their dynamic in this video that makes me ;__; AND this is another prime moment of lando narrating oscar's firsts for him (singing on camera at mcl!!!) . ALSAURR lando tapping oscar on the bicep while sarcastically complimenting him. once again for two guys who never touch it compels me... actually i could go on about this video tbh like how oscar nearly falls off the couch giggling at lando playing the songs together and then it cuts to the next one and he's suddenly all flushed and his bangs have gotten all fucked up. he's so... they're so... let's move on.

splunk sim city challenge (nov 2023): many classic lines such as "i haven't even distracted you yet!" + oscar knowing his podium year and lando saying "you're a nerd!" + lando going ":) :o are you okay?" and so on... general setup of this challenge was crasy tbh. how it revolves around disrupting the other person's focus and the visual asymmetry of one being sat higher and having to lean over to distract them and how oscar just giggles goodnaturedly when lando sticks his cue cards in front of his face instead of getting annoyed and—SO ON. also forever obsessed with how oscar wordlessly lifts his eyebrows at lando at the end lol

that one sticker video (nov 2023): this video is insaaAAANEEEE to me. ANYONE ELSE??? first of all oscar and lando gingerly standing across each other on either side of the flower bed (while zak brown assumes a power stance directly on it lmfao) is already so visually overwhelming but then the way oscar glances up as he's removing the sticker from the cap, how you can seeeeee him calculating the move the entire time and being adorably pleased about it, @__@ the way lando grins at him afterward... (also crying at zb glancing at them and being equally charmed by their antics) wahhh TT__TT the vibes of this clip... immaculate

oscar thanking lando in their final post-race message (nov 2023): honestly the entire message in general but :__) one of my fav 814 moments OAT is oscar including lando in his thank you speech and lando not really expecting it and being genuinely touched by the gesture. lando is so endearingly fidgety the entire time honestly and the way he perks up a bit and wrings his hands together and playfully smiles at oscar when he mentions him... okayyy. anyway 2 me it's reminiscent of yes/no challenge "am i the funniest teammate you've ever had?" "(shyly) yeahhh... you're up there" (said in the same baby-ish voice as "so... lando?" UGH. UGHHHH) and how lando genuinely gets a bit awkwardly flustered by it like!!! god. wait ALSO i don't have the space for this so i'm throwing in end of season awards MMMM debatable + how gleefully lando threw oscar under the bus and in general just the incredible expression work going on for both of them during this exchange. God [2]

si rapid fire questions (dec 2023): this video was crucial in determining that oscar... well. is obsessed with accommodating and mirroring lando. many things we already knew (aka listening to whatever music lando listens to; insert prema lap "maybe i should move to an english team because the music's better" moment here) but equally important is oscar "stealing" lando's dinner, how lando presses him on the back to the future question until oscar just changes his answer to his, and of course as you know per my blog title NO I'M GOING TO KEEP YOU HAPPY is in my eyes top 5 most insane things oscar piastri has ever said. likeee... lando showing a bit of jokey remorse over enforcing his rules (don't even get me started about lando and game/challenge rules...) but oscar being sooo determined 2 honor his teasing 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 :melting_face: x100!!!

need to split this into two lists because apparently there's a div character limit 😔 continuing on

hilton spa ad (feb 2024): of course this pained me because of This Moment (specifically lando bringing his hand back down when oscar tried to lift it from beneath him 😮‍💨) but that is neither here nor there. obsessed with the salmon at the engineering table anecdote because the most logical explanation for oscar Not doing that anymore is because lando didn't like it... or he just eats different things now but we already know that he's adopted lando's preferred meal b4 so that's equally a lot 2 digest !!! also >the callback to their one million LOOK AT YOU/HIM moments >how they touch shoulders exactly Once when they sit down and then never again despite lando continuously leaning into oscar's space to get to the button... eugh. also just top tier oscar faces + hair 🥰

opening title behind the scenes (mar 2024): thinking about all the hilarious gifsets of this moment that i ate up deliciously 🧡🧡🧡 this was such a significant reminder of how 814 have just gotten like, exceedingly comfortable around each other & have learned 2 communicate via the most inscrutable expressions and noises and gestures that somehow suit Them perfectly x__x although i doubt they will ever really become ~effusive~ with each it's frankly even more devastating that they both help each other care less about maintaining appearances / how they often get so sucked into their interactions (see next bullet point) that everything else kind of just fades away in that instant.... all right ⚠️⚠️⚠️ maybe that's a bit of a stretch but we can pretend for the rpf lens!!! see also my tag spiel in this beautiful tuva gifset.

photo day antics (mar 2024): do you ever just...... what went on in bahrain. honestly. more from this weekend in a second but this video plus the accompanying photo encapsulate their dynamic so perfectly it makes me scream... how 814 are not only so annoyingly focused on each other all the time but also stand SOOO UNNECESSARILY CLOSE while every other teammate pairing is spaced out normally. yuki and checo glancing at them alksfdhdf 😭 truly so ridiculous that the poor photo person tried to get lando's attention and they pretended to comply for two seconds before oscar was lifting his foot to show lando his boot again. also why did it take oscar a million years to step away from lando and put a more appropriate amount of space between them...?! and even then it was barely that much........... (10 paragraphs of speaking later) I prefer really not to speak.

accidental waist grab (mar 2024): this gave me psychic damage so bad i should be lobotomized. we've already spoken about this perhaps erm excessively but why did lando feel the need to stand JUST as close to him if not closer after they broke apart. there was truly no need...... honestly the way this ship will have us looking up driver cams and staring at esteban ocon's ass as he gets out his car just for a single glimpse of their parc fermé dynamic.

bahrain post-race interview antics (mar 2024): You already knowwwww. the sky sports "he follows me everywhere" moment is equally important but the f1tv interview giving us horrifically natural banter (juxtaposing this with their previous interview moments...), lando's dumb faux australian accent and oscar playing along as always, and most of all them HIJACKING THE INTERVIEW & commiserating on camera together ❓❗️ lichrally the grid photo all over again. often when i have emotions over an 814 moment i worry that i sound overly He_Only_Got_Two_Eyes.jpeg but truly sometimes two people are just objectively insane. plus land of piastri/lando piastri.....

also runner up is the f1tv interview with lawrence aka lando's cooing noise @ oscar discussing lily (anyone else frame by frame color pick oscar's face to see how badly he flushed... no? just me?) + the beautiful self-aware surfacing of the CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATIONS of their relationship...... !!! love when 2 guys expose and confirm their own sincerity in trying to verbally resist it. hem

is this anything. sorry eve LKSFDHLDHSF thank u for the ask & pls lmk what ur fav moments are too 🧡

[its-all-papaya]

for the ask game :

👗 put away clean laundry (a trope you’d like to see me write)

what about accidental marriage landoscar or a trapped in an elevator fic ?

okay i got two of these (thank you deeply, i've been fishing everything out of The Pile for the last few days and it sucks) so i put away HALF of the laundry and i'll do the other half after this and answer the other ask after that.

↠ please make me do my chores

trapped in an elevator landoscar is fascinating to me because i feel like depending on when it is, the vibes would vary so incredibly wildly. my first thought was like after a mid qualifying or a bad race, trying to get back to their rooms and lando is just a Bitch because he's moody and wants to be face-down in bed and this so incredibly inconvenient and he just. can't be here. oscar's being mild and trying to joke to make lando feel a bit better, and lando's trying to be kind bc that's his boy fr, but eventually he's like "this is a fucking joke, are we ever going to get out?" not sure where it would go from there, but feels like eventually they'd either Talk About It or Oscar would go anybody, nowhere mode and be like "if you sit in my lap and i rub ur back for a bit and you can put ur nose in my neck, would that help you chill out until we're free?" i'm partial to that one but i can't just write the same landoscar narrative over and over you know? maybe i can. who's to say.

the other option kicking around in my silly brain is Drunk getting-together Landoscar in an elevator bc i think we are all aware of lando's favorite post-drinking activity of finding a man to hang onto. so oscar trying to get him home to his apartment or hotel room but then they get trapped. and lando is like plastered to oscar's side already (probably oscar's been holding his hand since they left the club or whatever so lando would stop looking so sad) so when the elevator stops he's amenable for a bit. leaning into oscar's side with all his body weight so oscar HAS to put his arm around lando to keep him from collapsing. and when it's been long enough, eventually, they're sat together on the floor, lando's head on oscar's shoulder, "osc, can you play with my hair? i like when people touch my hair" and oscar is like "is that true?" bc lando is like. kind of neurotic about it sometimes. and lando is like "yes, of course! not at work, you muppet, that would be crazy" (even though oscar's totally touched lando's hair like a dozen times at work and lando's only ever grinned at him about it) "only when it's the right time. like when i'm sucking someone off and they pull my hair, that's the right time for sure." and oscar is like... oh! okay! cool, that's such a fun fact about you! and who knows where lando's drunk ramblings would take them from there!! (fuck me this feels so strongly like another fucking wip i need to lay off the microsoft word 'new document' button so baddddly)

accidental marriage landoscar.... (almost forgot the second half of this bc got distracted thinking about drunk lando telling oscar he looooooves it when men call him pretty). okay... idk how this would even happen and i need to sell things to myself to make the fic work, like it's got to be at least distantly very abstractly believable to me... but you know they'd be a disaster. it's not speaking to me the way trapped in an elevator is, but i love domestic shit so i could probably make this work if i thought about it longer than like 35 seconds... i'd probably make it kind of fake dating-y in theory like forced proximity...rings...that lando tottttttalllly doesn't get sooooo attached to why would you even ASK him that?? anyway.

[the-starry-seas]

Heyyy~ For the ask game: B D E J R X with the choosen ship of yours <3

mwah <3 also this ask game has made me realise that I don't actually know what rarepairs are in my fandoms LOL but this one is for Han and Lando!

B - What's your favorite thing about this ship?

They simply annoy the ever-living fuck out of each other constantly. Like you can absolutely see them arguing with each other as foreplay, My Cousin Vinny style. They're both that 'scoundrel with a heart of gold' sort of type of character and I simpy love that in a ship.

Also they have history! Such history! And I love when you can have an 'old friend' dynamic like Magneto and Prof X. Also I really need Han to know that Lando's full name is *checks notes* Landonis Balthazar Calrissian. Who did that.

Bickering like an old married couple, constantly tricking each other, the custody arguments over the Falcon are legendary, they bring up so many past misbehaviours to one-up each other, but at the end of the day... they're stealing from each others' hotel rooms and leaving a note signed with a "be better next time <3", and I love that for them.

D- Is this ship an OTP or do you also multiship these characters with other people? If the latter, is it your favorite of the multiships? Why or why not?

I don't ship Lando with anyone else. But alas Han/Lando cannot beat Han/Leia... I simply love Leia too much.

E - Do you have any favorite headcanons for this ship?

Whenever they hook up, they steal the Falcon from each other. It's just an expected thing at this point.

Lando is a snacker and keeps getting crumbs in the bed and Han is ready to stab him every time because food! goes! in! the! kitchen!

They have matching tattoos. Yes they were drunk. No neither of them have ever looked into getting it removed. (They're tramp stamps of the Falcon.)

Lando always brings champagne to their hookups even if he doesn't have any notice. It lowkey annoys Han because where does he even get it from???

They always go to the same hotel and never have use the same name or credit card. The desk staff is all well aware of what's happening and think they're funny.

Han showed up with a beard once and Lando reflexively shot at him.

Han likes flipping poker chips in the air when he's bored. It drives Lando nuts because Han uses the metal chips that are shiny and catch Lando's eye and distract him.

Once they accidentally set a hotel room on fire by knocking over a table with candles on it. They both say the other did it on purpose.

They always go halves on dinner/date costs while snarking at each other the whole time about freeloading and handouts and sugar daddies. They've confused so many waiters.

J - What kind of dynamic(s) does this ship have or do you imagine it would have (friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, A fell first B fell harder, etc.)?

Oh this is absolutely enemies to lovers LOL Plus some slow burn, I think... they're snarky and eyefucking but they don't realise it's what they're doing for... a while. Everyone else does, it's fine, and are so deeply annoyed with them. They're both the kind of people who flirt with everyone so it's a while before they realise they're serious about each other and not just angling for a one night stand like they would be with anyone else.

R - Are there any songs you associate with this ship?

Ooh! Yes! For more general vibes, I looove Always Gold by Radical Face. And they said you were the crooked kind / And that you'd never have no worth / But you were always gold to me

Devil's Backbone by The Civil Wars - Don't care if he's guilty, don't care if he's not / He's good and he's bad and he's all that I've got

Baby by Bishop Briggs - My baby's misunderstood / How could something so bad look so damn good / Yeah he's still my baby / Yeah he's fuckin' crazy but he's still my baby

After the whole 'sold Han out to Vader' thing, you have the sad love song called Never Love An Anchor. With this heart of mine that's guilty, not remorseful / There is love that doesn't have a place to rest

Minefields by Faouzia & John Legend - Maybe I'm just a fool / I still belong with you / Anywhere you, anywhere you are / These minefields that I walk through / What I risk to be close to you

Also, while not a song, there's a poem with the line: I do not want to see him go up in flames the way all heroes end up martyrs. And hm. Yeah.

X - What are their primary love languages and how do they prefer to express their love for each other?

Is 'annoying each other' a love language? Acts of disservice, perhaps? Jokes aside I think they share gift-giving and words of affirmation and neither of them will admit it. They have an inordinate amount of trinkets, however. Mutual praise kink, woo!

[fear8not1]

FIC WRITER INTERVIEW

thank you for the tag @its-all-papaya and for reviving my dead tumblr

How many works do you have on AO3?

i currently have nine works on this account and i had about 11 on an old one

What's your total AO3 word count?

115,450 jesus who wrote so many words????

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

anything you ask i do (for you) - 1 496 (wtf) - Formula 1 RPF

let's take a breath (before we go, go, go) - 758 (???) - House MD

that's the speed - 672 - Formula 1 RPF which might get a chap 2 and 3 before the end of the year .... ???

i wanna hear you say my name - 668 - One Piece

except you (you can stay) - 572 - Formula 1 RPF

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

yeah, i do ! i respond to all comments except hearts (because i'm not sure they're really meant to be answered). i think it's really important to thank people who take the time to leave comments, whether they're entirely fleshed out analysis of our works or just keysmashes.

i most likely will never be an actual writer, but writing on ao3, exchanging with people about the dumb little things i write is the closest to being a proper writer. it's really nice and i want to give back as much joy and happiness as i receive :)

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

i just realised i don't write a lot of angst at all. i do have a couple of angsty drafts but i never feel good writing angsty ending... i guess song of myself would be the closest thing to an angsty ending in all of my works ? maybe ? but it's a dead poets society fic so of course it's kinda angsty. maybe i'll try to finish those angsty drafts one day, i'm not terrible at it it just makes me :(

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

i like getting together ending so pretty much all of them outside of song of myself LMAO

Do you write crossovers?

no, never tried

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

back in my fanfiction.net days yeah but nothing bad

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes! i write a bit of everything for smut, although i haven't dabbled in uncommon fetishes and kinks (don't know if i ever will but it'd be good practice). i find it rather easy to write smut because a lot of it is focused on emotions and feelings, which is what i prefer writing.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

don't think so no

Have you ever had a fic translated?

no

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

back in the days yeah but co-author ghosted me LMAOO and then like soph, a lot of roleplaying so a technical yes ig

What's your all-time favorite ship?

oh that's a tough one. honestly this may sound a bit dumb but probably landoscar ? i've written a lot of ships, been a fan of even more than what i've written, but i just can't seem to let go of landoscar at all. i think it's half because i truly enjoy their personalities and dynamic and half because i feel so close to oscar. we have a very similar personality and way of doing things that makes it soooo easy to write him. so the process is not difficult usually

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

as soph said, all of my WIPs LMAO i have over 30 drafts just for landoscar stuff. there's one that i absolutely love but know i most likely won't finish it (and since i won't, i'll share a bit with you) ;

it's a color soulmate AU. you live life in greyscale up until your soulmate touches you.

lando is a very famous painter who sees in greyscale as he has not touched his soulmate yet. oscar works at a museum where lando is granted access because he's struggling with his most recent painting. they spend a while together analysing paintings and techniques and everything, getting to know each other through art. lando still deeply struggled with his painting ; no matter what he does, it feels wrong. his background is painted, but the middle stays empty. after a while, at a party, oscar briefly touches lando who regains his color gradually. he doesn't know who touched him, obviously, and has a major freak out where he ditches oscar for a few days. he finally sees his paintings in color for the first time ever which makes things even worse. he refuses to see his works for a bit, tries to figure out who the hell could have touched him (obviously fails). finally, he grows some balls and goes back to the museum and oscar is just observing his favorite painting, one he has master copied while oscar was watching, and it hits him like a brick. oscar is what he needs to add to his painting.

anyway. the thing is entirely fleshed out in my head but i have so many drafts, so many things to write that even the tiniest bit of research is too much atm. maybe one day...

What are your writing strengths?

i think i'm good at dialogue and emotions. a good number of people have told me they've cried reading some of my other stuff, which is always good, and i think i have a high understanding of how people work mentally so it makes writing emotions, dialogue, characterisation in general a bit easier.

What are your writing weaknesses?

i really suck with descriptive pieces. i always forget to set the location and include spatial points for the reader to cling onto. i don't think i'm great at action scenes either because i'm too deep into emotions and feelings to really give a proper view of everything.

more than everything, though, i have a huge, huge problem with motivation and inspiration. im always inspired, i have a concerning amount of drafts, but most of them are around 3-4k. that's when i generally forget about them or move on to another idea. i try to fix that by going back to one of them every time i write my main idea but i only end up adding 500 words before going back to my main idea. which sucks.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i think it can be useful if the reader is meant to be alienated, but it never works fully unless its a made up language. other than that, i don't mind it too much but i think outside of tiny words here and there (pet names in mother language, national name for a town etc) it's not that useful. a bit of a pain in the ass if you're a native english writer (i'm not, but still), and a bit of a pain in the ass if you're the reader.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

funnily enough, same answer as soph. i used to write a lot of one direction back in the days. technically, the first ever fandom would have been warrior cats which is . something. so i'm gonna stick with one direction, the second fandom i've written for. after that it'd have been harry potter or teen wolf.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

for ships, i have a few loscar drafts and a few logan/alex/george ideas. i don't feel entirely comfortable writing alex (specifically), but who knows. for fandoms, i have a few shield fics that i absolutely love (WWE team) and want to get to soon, a few friends fics that i think would be nice to post, some mentalist/the office/hannibal ones, too. i tend to always be too into whatever i'm watching so that makes a lot of fandoms in the end lol.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

i'm satisfied with all of them, but i really like anything you ask i do (for you) because i don't usually write getting together stories without a side of smut, so it felt a bit different. it also was purely because i love fake dating and wanted more for landoscar. except you (you can stay) is also a favorite of mine because it was my way of coping with being sick far from my family and the idea of someone washing my hair for me honestly carried me through it LMAO.

i'm gonna cheat a little but i'm also gonna add vampire landoscar, my current WIP, because it has been very fun to write even though i kinda forgot about it for like, six months.

not tagging anyone but please do this if you feel like it !! <3

[qqueenofhades]

Since when does fandom seem to think Han Solo is dumb? Is it the Solo movie? Backlash? The special edition not having him shoot first??? I always found him resourceful and good at thinking on his feet, just uneducated.

Couldn't tell you, as I have neither watched Solo nor am I actively involved in the (often batshit insane) Star Wars fandom. I just sit in my corner and reblog pretty pictures and have my feelings, but since Han was one of my Original Blorbos back from lo many years ago, I obviously have Opinions on him. And frankly, the "Han is dumb har har har!" seems like it comes in the vein of the other popular fanon about Han: that he is some suave, ultra-smooth, love-'em-and-leave-'em ladies' man who has left a trail of broken hearts across the galaxy. And like, yes, '80s Harrison Ford is indeed very hot, but Han Solo is a walking disaster of a human being who can barely talk to his crush without insulting her, runs screaming at an entire squad of stormtroopers in the Death Star and then promptly runs the other way ALSO screaming, and his best friend is the shaggy weird guy with whom he smuggles pot in their broken-down old VW bus. This man is a loser, is what I am saying. Zero suave detected anywhere. Just see how terribly he fails at playing it cool when Lando is flirting with Leia in ESB. There is practically smoke pouring out his ears. HAN SOLO NO LIKEY!!

Likewise, that is why Han Solo in the sequel trilogy is just bad fanon Han Solo, and nothing else. In the sequel trilogy's zeitgeistian haste to make the whole thing as avant-garde grimdark Dark Sci Fi as possible, they forgot a) the goofy, playful element of SW, and b) how deeply the original trilogy main characters were motivated by love, NOT cynicism. Han is a wisecracking, sarcastic smartass whose idea of flirting with Leia is arguments in the middle of the corridor on Hoth while the rebels just go around them like "welp, Han and Leia bickering again, must be Tuesday." But he is also the guy who says, "I know," trying to comfort Leia as he is about to be frozen in carbonite and quite possibly die, and tells Chewie to stop fighting, giving up any chance to save himself, so that Chewie can protect Leia. Then in ROTJ, he is ready to step aside if Leia loves Luke, only to be totally shocked to find out that they're siblings. (Han's face journey in that whole scene is one of my favorite things.) Like. That is not some suave galactic Don Juan unparalleled in his wooage skills and confident that his crush would pick him. Han Solo is a dork. The end.

Honestly, I don't care if Harrison wanted Han to get killed off. Who on earth was like "oh yeah Han would totally abandon Leia and their son and go back to being a Broody Loner because we think this is very sophisticated and postmodern storytelling?" If they absolutely had to do the Kyle plot, since it involved likewise butchering Luke's character, Han would charge out there, grab Kyle, be like APOLOGIZE TO YOUR MOTHER!!! and then ground him from using the Falcon for two weeks while trying desperately to stay mad at him. Either that or he and Leia would be the ultimate bantering-but-still-crazy-about-each-other middle-aged power couple fixing it TOGETHER, and that is (and remains) the only canon I will ever accept.

[sauntering-down]

it's Monday and i did not wake up in a good mood, so i cheered myself up by rereading that time i experienced the first book in the New Jedi Order EU Star Wars series and liveblogged it to @cassiopixie. yes, that's the book where Chewie dies. no, she did not warn me. in case you want to experience the Nonsense™ for yourself...

well, i'm just diving into Vector Prime with absolutely no knowledge of the larger EU, so we'll see what happens

can't believe that run-on got published

…in what universe would Threepio's voice be considered "melodious" Leia. honey. are you okay. blink once for yes and twice for no.

if Mara's eyes sparkle or twinkle one more time i'm gonna riot

Mary: I was suddenly slammed with the memory of how there's a whole side plot in the EU with Luke falling in love with a Force Ghost who possesses another body and is from the planet CHAD me: ...what the unholy fuck

jfc i hope "Wurth Skidder" isn't a name because it's a fecking terrible one

hm, getting the impression Nomnom might be a bit of a douchebag yeah, he and his buddies just stoned a pit full of droids to death

tell me what's wrong with this, Mary. prove you're better than whoever edited this novel. also they're all young, in case you forgot. in case you forgot Danni is a young woman… she's young.

ah yes, he happily removes his disguise and surveys his "ornamental disfigurements" like a split eyelid and torn mouth, because that's totally a normal thing to do

THEY FUCKING COMMUNICATE THROUGH LUMPS WITH EYES THAT THEY STROKE A LOT MARY I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS

the thing turns itself inside-out and resembles the head of the dude he's talking to. what. the. fuck!

ah yes, recreational organ transplants, my favorite activity

this Wookiee's name is Triebakk and i s2g i keep reading it as Trebek so this Wookiee is Alex Trebek, the beloved host of Jeopardy gets really funny when the dude howls in protest imagine someone getting a Jeopardy question wrong and Alex Trebek just screaming wordlessly at them

politics are boring. i hope Jacen goes full Darth Brayden on them soon and stabs somebody

me: how much younger is he than the twins? Mary: Like…three years younger, I think??? Mary: So obviously he's not a baby, but a BABY all the same me: the wiki says a year and a half lol. so he'd be between 14 and 15, since the twins are 16… me: not QUITE a baby. a senior baby, perhaps. (aka the reason Anakin Solo is referred to as 'Senior Baby' frequently for the rest of this thing)

this story is going to be an ordeal

okay yeah Anakin's 15 and fucked up the Falcon by trying some flashy flying lmao gosh i love reading about characters who don't, you know, get off on MUTILATING THEMSELVES

HAH Anakin insults the Falcon and Chewie threatens to bite the kid's lightsaber in half. this is why the sequels sucked. none of this tomfoolery.

Lando invented an asteroid-dodging game that's only MODERATELY dangerous and somehow i'm not surprised at all

Mary: God do these guys ever RELAX and NOT TORTURE EACH OTHER

me: that'd be a no Mary: I…are we just reading carefully disguised hentai? me: very possibly

Mara's sick, the ~mysterious illness~ aka what's probably like mutated YV sperm or something, these sick fucks, is attacking her uterus and she's afraid she won't be able to have children… got some news for ya, lady you'll have a Ben eventually. he's MUCH better than the one we have now, i'm sure…

Jacen's in a Mood so he goes to annoy his little brother, a relatable sentiment

oh god Jacen is in top "i'm older and i know best so let me lecture you" form

YES THEY'RE GONNA LIGHTSABER BATTLE FUCK EACH OTHER UP a proper non-masochistic beatdown fuck yeah

Han's still fixing the Falcon and in the process gets annoyed at Chewie and zaps him in the ass with a live wire. i think this is flirting.

HAN AND LEIA ARE STILL DEEPLY IN LOVE SO FUCK YOU SEQUELS

point in this book's favor, Leia occasionally feels a little jealous of Mara's mentor-student relationship with Jaina, but overall the two of them get along REALLY well and it's just nice to see. no bitchiness or nonsense. good female friendship.

Yomin Carr, sabotaging a ship: ew ew ew i have to touch this filthy technology with my pure mutilated Yuuzhan Vong hands

i'm glad you're my copilot on this adventure. i think otherwise i would've quit right around the time the sadomasochistic rituals started…

k we're starting off at a dock on a planet called Reecee. i initially read that as Reeeee and wondered why anyone needed that many Es

Lando: hugs Han Lando: hugs Leia LONGER Han: >:||||| Lando: gives Mara the ULTIMATE HUG Luke: hell yeah my wife totally deserves this

this rando Jedi named Kyp has the top time when it comes to racing through the asteroid belt and Jaina reeeeeally wants to beat him lol Jacen crashes Anakin does better and then faceplants into a giant asteroid Jaina finally crashes after 27 minutes, more than doubling Kyp's time Anakin hasn't come back so i'm just gonna assume he's still floating around out there until i'm told otherwise

MAYBE I'D RATHER READ ABOUT JAINA BEING BADASS THAN PEOPLE GETTING CLEAVED OPEN WITH AXES, YOMIN CARR. EVER THOUGHT OF THAT

lmao Kyp's squadron leaves while blasting music through the loudspeakers and showing off their cool flying

okay, so far Jaina is all awesome all the time, Jacen won't quit philosophizing, and Anakin's the only one who acts like a normal teenager

Kyp's squad is called the Dozen-and-Two Avengers and ngl that does not roll off the tongue at all

OH BOY now Lando wants Han to go to Sernpidal, aka the next target of ol' Nomnom and Luke and Mara are going to the planet Yomin Carr just climate-changed to death Leia tells Han to take their least exciting Senior Baby son with him

and Kyp figures out a way to make it to Sernpidal. DON'T DO IT THE YUUZHAN VONG ARE GOING TO HAVE PAIN ORGIES THERE AND THEN DROP A MOON ON THE PLACE

sweet, it's Miko! he's going to be fed to a tentacle beast shortly, but hey, he's alive for now what with all the hentai and sadomasochism so far, i guess vore was next on the board

Nom Nom and Da'Gara: wow can't wait to mentally break this Jedi before we toss him to the tentacles!!! evil chuckling

every time Anakin and Chewie are in the same room, they pick on one another lol Chewie, you're like, 300 years old. stop stooping to a fifteen-year-old's level

welp, apparently in seven hours the moon's going to crash into the planet. THANKS NOM NOM

they've figured out SOMETHING is pulling the moon down. i can tell them right now it's disgusting because the YV thrive on that shit Anakin's gonna go find it while Han and Chewie evac as many people as they can… look at Senior Baby, finally getting to do something

god dammit Artoo you're supposed to lay off the rum i bet you haven't been going to your AA meetings again

me: this stuff would be really cool if it wasn't the fucking Yuuzhan Vong Mary: It would also be cool if it wasn't ONE WHOLE SENTENCE

#relatable

MARA SHANKS THIS BITCH FUCK YEAH press F to pay respects to Yomin Carr? I DON'T THINK SO

oooh, Miko's still alive! i guess they're torturing him by tricking his brain into thinking he's being repeatedly vored

Anakin Solo Has Two Dads

Chewie just fucking YEETS Anakin at Han lol

me: OH MY GOD WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK me: WHAAAAAT THE FUUUUUUUCK Mary: …I didn't want to tell you that this was the infamous book where Chewie dies, but… me: CHEWIE NOOOOOO .__.

like, okay, getting an entire moon to the face is a badass way to go, but OMG WAS THAT REALLY NECESSARY??????

now i feel bad for Senior Baby. he is baby. someone give him a hug

well, at least Anakin Gets Shit Done, rescuing the x-wing while they're being attacked by insects and he fries them with some electricity, which even Han is happy about. i am also happy because the last couple interactions between them were difficult to read lol

me: oh good, Jacen's not being a dick to Anakin about what happened to Chewie me: awwww Jaina is a good sister, hugging him and all Mary: They're good sibs me: too bad about that death and Sith thing

maybe you should lend Mara to your sons for a while, especially Senior Baby

let's EAT while reading about the fucking Yuuzhan Vong jerking off to pain

i have to revise my earlier prediction, i kinda love them all might be ride-or-die for Senior Baby, surprisingly. he's growing on me

Anakin: alright Jaina's the good pilot let's do some wild telepathic mind-joining shit so she can kick ass and take names through us! Jacen: welp, okay

we were deprived of Darth Aiden and got Darth Jaiden instead. tragedy.

anyway, the sibs do amazing for a bit, but then Anakin gets overloaded and loses the bond then i think he blasts off into hyperspace to escape the asteroids before he goes splat, but blacks out in the process nobody has ANY idea where he went, but Han and Leia go after him anyway. good luck dudes

meanwhile, Anakin's chilling out in dead space like "well, if my sibs are okay, that's cool, i don't mind dying. if they're dead, i'm gonna fucking riot"

Da'Gara: maybe i should be worried about the lack of communication from Yomin Carr? nah lol gonna focus on glory and shit instead

Han: WHERE did these idiot kids get their recklessness from????? Leia: wow. much wonder. very surprise.

Lando: the pilot was wearing a mask we think connected her to the ship, but nobody's tested it. Luke: aight hold on a second

oh thank GOD Han's stopped being a dick, actually hugs his poor kid

Jacen gets to put on the creepy YV living pain suit and creepy YV living breathing apparatus such fun

Miko… goes down taking two more YV with him. godspeed, dude

Jaina, Consummate Badass Pilot, catches the iceborer and skips off into hyperspace in one gorgeous movement

the war council convenes and pretty much decides they are SO fucked …so they're gonna like. evaporate as much moisture off the planet as possible, cool it down so the volcanoes quit working and the entire thing freezes. that doesn't sound right but i don't know enough about science to refute it

Senior Baby getting all excited about physics over here

…there are NINETEEN books in the NJO series how many different ways can you have the Yuuzhan Vong fetishizing pain and destroying entire planets

Mary: Thank you for letting me come with you on this wild ride hahaha me: no problem, my dude me: i will never ever touch anything from the EU ever again me: fucking Yuuzhan Vong Mary: Any EU book is better than Crystal Star, where Luke is sad because he can't feel the Force because a sun exploded near them, so he joins a cult that worships a giant golden blob me: that's just an average Wednesday afternoon for me

[milfglupshitto]

Shadow of the Sith review

spoilers for the book below:

I’m not sure how best to format this, but I’ll try and list positives first, then negatives, and lastly summarize my final thoughts.

things I enjoyed:

- Luke and Lando as a team! the pair have a vastly underrated dynamic we don’t get to see often.

- ironically enough, Ochi of Bestoon. maybe it’s because I haven’t been keeping up with the comics which I’ve heard have been inundated with his presence, but I thought he was a perfectly miserable character and I had fun seeing him fall apart.

- the TIE Defender my best friend the TIE Defender. the implications of the ship being designed from the beginning to mimic Sith architecture are deeply fascinating to me.

- also on the subject of Sith designs: I really enjoyed the presence those artifacts had in both the narrative and the actual prose. the seeing stone sequence was particularly well done.

- Rey’s family. While some parts frustrated me (more on that below) I enjoyed Dathan and Miramir as characters, and even knowing where their path ended I was still kept in suspense wondering how they would get there.

things I wish were better executed:

- This book was very cameo-heavy. Not necessarily a problem, but if a reader can’t identify if information about an object is being given because it will be helpful later in the book or if it’s meant to remind them that they know this thing already from another source… let’s just say I got a few things spoiled because I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to know them already or not.

- Some of the dialogue and characterization choices felt very… off to me. The guard droid on Polaar spoke in a very human way that had me checking dialogue tags frequently, and many of the elements of Zargo Anaximander’s description and speech patterns had me skeptical at best of authorial bias. The whole scene from Mico Haswell’s perspective where he details prejudices against most of his colleagues and then in the next scene Luke senses all the love and concern those colleagues have for him came off as just too over the top (and at least to me, slightly reminiscent of the “Walk Up Not Out” campaigns they introduced at my school and others to prevent gun violence by encouraging students to approach peers who seemed isolated, blaming horrific violence on mental health issues and placing the onus on the students to solve it rather than the adults who ought to be responsible for the minors in their care), especially given that it’s never made clear if the student he attacked under the influence of the Sith artifact actually survived?

- Lando’s treatment by the story. One of my favorite aspects of the post-ROTJ stories in the EU was the way that the team from the films was able to come together for new missions, unlike in Disney’s sequel trilogy. When I first began reading these stories I was pleasantly surprised by the way that Lando was included just as fully as Han, Leia, and Luke, with his strengths and insights allowed to flourish, which I had unfortunately rarely seen in most of the fanon for that era. While I thought it made since for Lando to be jaded and off his game in this story, after the tragic loss of his child, it seemed that too often he was simply along for the ride, with his contributions dismissed or rendered unimportant by the characters with higher training or more powerful abilities. The idiot’s array scene near the end of the book was refreshing, but I wish he had been able to have more of those moments throughout, moments that make it clear his instincts are correct but in his grief he’s terrified of being wrong and allows doubt to hold him back.

I’m sure there are other positives and negatives I’m forgetting, and I’ll add those later if they come to me. Overall, I enjoyed this novel, and can appreciate what it was trying to do in terms of leading into the sequel trilogy. However, there are certain elements of the story which simply sat the wrong way with me. If I had to rate this book I would say maybe 7/10? As always I’m happy to provide more detailed information and answer any questions for anyone considering whether or not they should read this book.

[levitatingbiscuits]

Bail Organa for the character asks!

my favorite thing about bail is his love for and absolute faith in leia. she was nineteen in rogue one but he had total trust in her and her capabilities. when i was nineteen my dad didn’t even trust me with his car lmao

least favorite thing about him is that during order 66 he just kind of watched zett jukassa die. no attempt to help this sixth grader fighting for his life, he just yells in dismay then flies away. i understand that bail is more of a politician than a fighter but cmon, he raised leia to be a rebel spy, there’s no way he doesn’t know how to use a blaster. but i think it’s an unfortunately realistic reaction for that kind of scenario, and the guilt and horror canonically haunted his dreams afterwards so i don’t hold it against him. and later on he was the victim of a very similar genocide, ALSO because of vader, so it’s not like he can’t empathize with the kid

favorite line is “I would trust her with my life” in rogue one uwu <333

brOTP is him and obi-wan, of course!

OTP is him and queen breha. the girlboss to his malewife <3 (OT3 is them and obi-wan because they strike me as a sexy swinger couple, but not like the gross kind that hunts unicorns on space tinder. they COURT obi-wan. they have wine and roses and everything. i don’t think they’re in love with him but they both care deeply for him and he kinda-sorta gave them their daughter so they joke that he was their surrogate.)

i don’t really have a nOTP for him? unless people ship him with jar jar or something. i certainly hope they don’t

random headcanon is that he and lando would’ve gotten on like a house on fire if they ever met. they’re both responsible leader types, lovers over fighters, and share an appreciation for capes

i don’t think i have an unpopular opinion about him but i think it would be funny if he was a girldad with a bunch of internalized misandry and that’s why he didn’t want luke. he’s a pickme boy.

song i associate with him: for some reason the first thing that popped into my head was long black veil by lefty frizzel. yeah i don’t know what my thought process is either

favorite picture of him: i hope it’s not cheating to have a couple!

the last one always cracks me up. he looks like he’s not even bothered. obi-wan looks like his disgruntled house cat being taken to the vet

[starwarsforcestuff]

Can you do number 4?

Number 4 was fave/least fave character. So I believe this needs to be divided up into Movies (Prequel, Original, Sequel), Books, Games and TV shows. Star Wars is such a vast universe that breaking it down like this actually helps me.

Prequels

Obi-Wan Kenobi is my favorite prequel character, hands down. Part of it is his sass but, the biggest reason is his persistence and will to stand up for what he believes in, be that the Torce, Anakin, Democracy or his promise to his dying Master to train Anakin against the wishes of the Council. Obi-Wan is a person you can rely on.

I didn’t really have any specific character that was my least favorite, but if I must I’ll just post them and you all can attack me. 

Jango Fett. Hyped over nothing. The only thing remotely interesting about him is the fact that he was the clone template. Even Mandalore was like “We don’t know him.” 

Now I know what you’re thinking. Why Darth Maul? How could you? Maul is the coolest! You’re not wrong, but you are also probably allowing the comics and TV shows to enhance this character. This is purely based on what we see in The Phantom Menace. He let his arrogance get the best of him and Obi-Won kicked his ass. That is all. However, his story and Dathomir and the Nightsisters are pretty cool. If you don’t know anything about it I HIGHLY suggest you look it up. It is equal parts interesting, cool, and tragic.

The Original Trilogy

Yoda is my favorite. He may be my favorite of all time. Through the entire Skywalker Saga Yoda has been wise and powerful. He is deeply devoted to the Force and is wise enough to admit when he was wrong and learn from his mistakes. While I was not a fan of The Last Jedi I thought having Yoda come back and tell Luke to learn from his mistakes because failure is the greatest teacher was just very profound. In a way, Yoda was also telling Luke to learn from his (Yoda and the old Jedi Order’s) mistakes. 

I don’t have a character that is the least favorite for me. I think all the characters for the OT were influential and interesting and original for the most part. That being said Lando Calrissian would have to be one of the characters I just don’t particularly care about. My thoughts are neither overwhelmingly positive or negative for this character.

Sequels

Rey. She is not a very original character. Most of her journey is remarkably similar to Luke’s, but then again, Luke is not the most original character. They both follow the Hero’s Journey as illustrated in Joseph Campbell’s book The Hero With A Thousand Faces. (If you are unfamiliar with the Hero’s Journey please click the link. It will bring you to a very short youtube video that explains it really well with examples.) Either way, Rey makes her own mark in the Star Wars universe. She is powerful, motivated, and fights for the light despite the tragedies that have surrounded her.

General Armitage Hux was a character I absolutely could not stand. Part of it was a devotion to The First Order, part of it was he was just an unlikeable person. That being said, I loved that I hated him. I was really disappointed when he died. So anti-climatic, I wanted a better death than to just be shot. Maybe a full-on execution or maybe he could have gone out Kamakazi style trying to sabotage Kylo Ren’s plans. 

Books

Vi Moradi from Black Spire by Delilah S. Dawson is a complicated character that fights her own inner prejudice to help establish a resistance base on Batuu while helping a former First Order officer, CD-O922 “Captain Cardinal” aka Archex recover and adjust to life in the resistance after torturing her in a previous book (Phasma). That being said, 

Captain Cardinal aka Archex. Another complicated character who sometimes struggles to shake the brainwashing of the First Order and recover from an injury received by Captain Phasma. He is one of my favorites due to his self-sacrifice. To ensure that the First Order believes there is no resistance on Batuu, he sacrifices himself to blow up a First Order ship after sending an all-clear message to the First Order to make them think it was a malfunction.

There is no picture for him, but Winshur Bratt from Resistance Reborn by Rebecca Roanhorse was truly a terrible person. He kicked a girl close to near death and didn’t even care. He was power-hungry and had some major childhood issues he needed to resolve, but thought that joining the First Order would have helped that. 

Games

Cal Kestus from Jedi Fallen Order. A Padawan during Order 66, he survived due to the sacrifice of his master and has lived in secret ever since, until he is discovered by the inquisitors. Cal relearns the ways of the Force and meets new friends along the way. What I like most about him is how he stood by the principles of the Jedi even when he had nothing to lose from going to the dark side.

Carth Onasi from Knights of the Old Republic. I just think he is really annoying. In all fairness, I’ve actually not finished playing the game so I can’t say much, but I just find him annoying most of the time. 

TV Shows 

The Child aka Baby Yoda. That’s it. We don’t know much about it other than he is 50 and it is Mando’s job to take care of him, but he is so cute. 

Like Darth Maul, cool, but ultimately I just don’t like her. The Jedi Lost book by Cavan Scott really kinda ruined her for me for some reason. 

Well, this lasted much longer than I anticipated. Let me know if any of my answers match yours!

[onwardintolight]

My initial TROS thoughts

I’m still on cloud nine from last night. Not only did I get to fulfill a dream of trooping at a local premiere with the Rebel Legion, but the movie. 

THE MOVIE. 

It was so much more than I’d hoped for. It was an incredible end to this saga. 

I have a lot of thoughts, and it’s still all kind of jumbled up since I only just saw it last night (I know I’ll have a crazy amount of thoughts and theories and meta after I’ve seen it a few more times and had more time to digest it all) but I just wanted to get some of this out right now because I can hardly bear keeping it all in.

I will keep this spoiler free initially, then delve into spoilers under the cut.

First of all, I haven’t felt this way watching a Star Wars movie since I was a little girl watching Return of the Jedi. I seriously felt like a kid again. I felt that “Star Wars” feeling, that magic. I felt completely immersed in the story, led on a wild ride with no clue where it would lead. I felt the enormous stakes, I felt the camaraderie and love between the characters, I felt the depth and the meaning of the story that was being told and how it was both incredibly personal and galactic in scope.

Everyone has their own Star Wars, and I’m of the opinion that it’s all valid. Whether you’re primarily an OT fan, a prequels fan, a sequels fan, strictly old EU, or whatever else you may be, I’m here for you enjoying Star Wars in your own way. So please understand that when I say that, to me, this movie is the Star Warsiest Star Wars to ever Star Wars since the OT, that’s my perspective, and I respect your right to disagree (and I know many probably will). 

But to me, this movie felt like coming home. This was, once again, my Star Wars, the Star Wars I fell in love with as a little kid.

When I say that, I also say that as someone who is a fan of the entire saga. I’ve grown to love and deeply appreciate the prequels. While I was initially disappointed by them, I’ve grown to love and appreciate the sequels, too. Rogue One is one of my all-time favorite movies, and I adore Solo. But TROS will likely be among my top Star Wars movies of all time, right up there with ESB and ROTJ.

I know this movie has divided a lot of people. Many people who had specific hopes had those hopes dashed. And I acknowledge that there were some problems that should be critiqued. If you didn’t like this movie, your feelings are valid.

But right now, for the most part, I don’t want to think about all that. I just want to celebrate something that I love and that has already meant so much more to me than I could have possibly guessed.

Before I go to the cut, I just want to urge you not to continue reading if you haven’t seen the movie and haven’t heard all the major spoilers. There are some pretty huge moments and reveals in TROS. I managed to avoid all unofficially released spoilers, and I’m so glad I did, because it wouldn’t have been the same. Seeing the facts laid out on a page is not the same as watching the journey. If I’d seen the facts, I may have scoffed at some of them. Instead, I let the story lead me, and I believed in it and I was invested in it with my whole heart. Unless you have your heart absolutely set on a specific outcome and you know you will feel devastated if it doesn’t happen, I HIGHLY recommend going into this movie with an open mind, free from spoilers.

AGAIN: DO NOT READ ON IF YOU DON’T WANT MAJOR, MAJOR SPOILERS. THIS IS YOUR LAST WARNING

Okay, now for some random spoilerific thoughts! This is by no means comprehensive (and rather OT-character heavy, though I feel a lot too about the ST characters), but just a few things I wanted to get out.

First of all, they did my OT characters so right. This was a better ending than I could have imagined. I do wish we’d gotten to see all three of them on screen together one last time, and I also wish Han and Leia had never broken up before TFA. But those objections feel pretty small now. The books made Han and Leia’s separation much easier to bear (it was clear it was only for a few years, and they still loved each other). And despite not being physically all together, I felt almost as if they were together in this movie in spirit. Each of the three got to play a part so magnificent and meaningful, I can still hardly believe it. 

HAN!!! HAN APPEARING TO BEN!! I HAD NO IDEA HE WOULD BE IN THIS MOVIE BUT HE WAS AND IT WAS SO INCREDIBLY GOOD!! I want to cry just thinking about it. I know Ben said he must have been projected from his memories, but I think maybe, just maybe, it might be something more. Either way, it was one of the most powerful moments in the film and I wept.

LUKE. Luke got to prove that, as Yoda said, “the greatest teacher, failure is.” He was such a strong, benevolent, encouraging figure in this movie. I have no objections to where Rian Johnson took his character in TLJ—we all spend our lives learning and relearning the same lessons, after all, in deeper and deeper ways, and I felt it made sense for his character, AND it was a meaningful and powerful message/representation for those struggling with mental health—but I was also incredibly glad to see this Luke in TROS, “more powerful than you can imagine” as a Force ghost and just as much the Jedi he was when he threw his lightsaber away in ROTJ—and more, because of all that he’s grown through and how much wisdom he’s attained since then.

And OMG LEIA.

THEY DID MY PRINCESS RIGHT.

JEDI MASTER LEIA. LEIA TRAINING REY. LEIA’S LIGHTSABER!!!

I started sobbing the moment it became clear that she was going to use her last strength to try to reach Ben (more on that later). The sobbing continued when her lightsaber was given to Rey, and then that AMAZING FREAKING TRAINING FLASHBACK scene happened, and I was sobbing so hard from pure happiness, just processing all the joy, that I hardly noticed any details and had to ask someone later what color her lightsaber was and what was said.

This was, truly, Leia’s movie, just as it was always supposed to be, just as TFA was Han’s and TLJ was Luke’s. I couldn’t believe that they managed it. It was so incredibly meaningful and it was an incredible tribute to Carrie and to my favorite character.

Back to Leia reaching out to Ben. Over the years, I’ve slowly grown to be pro bendemption. That might surprise a few people on here since I haven’t written much about it—not for lack of wanting to, but just because I never really got around to it. I know many people who fervently aren’t a fan of the idea. I could write a whole essay on this, but it’s late so I’m gonna leave it at this for now: to me, it became so clear that he still had light in him, and the potential to turn back and atone. Plus, it hurt too much to think that Han and Leia’s son, and the Skywalker legacy, could fall and end in such evil and ruin. I wanted the Skywalkers to ultimately change the galaxy for good and bring balance and all that, just as was promised. I wanted this family to ultimately be this vast force of Light, despite all the evil the Dark unleashed through some of them.

Well, I feel like I got that in this movie. And not only the Skywalkers, but the granddaughter of Palpatine, too. It was as if everything that was dark and evil got overturned from the inside. It was so triumphant. The Skywalker legacy lives on in the best way.

But yeah, Leia being the one to really reach out and help bring Ben back to the light, and Han helping, was just everything my heart could have wanted. 

Gaaaahhhh there’s so much more, and it’s getting late and I need to go to bed, but a few short things before then:

- THAT FINAL CONFRONTATION HOLY CRAP. I have so many questions but also I just loved it

- I even loved the kiss.

- Ben crawling back to help Rey 😭

- LANDO LANDO LANDO

- FREAKING WEDGE

- the whole dynamic between the new cast was just perfect

- the one thing I’m mad about and probably always will be is that Rose was horribly sidelined :(

- however I’m not mad, like a lot of people are, that Rey isn’t actually a “nobody.” I’ll write more on this later but for now I’ll just say that, while Rey being a nobody is a powerful story, I never felt like it had to be that way, because we’ve already got Anakin’s story. And, tbh, many of the Jedi. Star Wars, while revolving around a certain family, has never indicated that lineage is everything or that people can’t be heroes from anywhere.

- And FINN

- OMG FORCE SENSITIVE FINN I JUST WANTED TO JUMP UP AND DOWN AND CHEER

Okay this is really enough for tonight. Can’t wait to see it again tomorrow!

[mecachrome]

Do you have any wag oscar headcanons/fic ideas? That trope is also my fave thing lol.

Just imagining uni student Oscar coming along to races when he can. Does get the occasional feature on lando jpg. Fans obviously hunt down the guy always following around lando and the only thing they get from their internet stalking is old articles of Oscar winning school competitions and an inactive facebook.

omg yes anon you have absolutely perfect taste!!! honestly my favorite "tropes" are all things that lend themselves perfectly to wag aus (mixed media, outsider pov, established & secret relationship) so it's impossible for me to not be obsessed with them 😭 also i find the voyeuristic fandom 4th wall angle sooo entertaining and intriguing despite not actually caring about wag drama irl in the least! it's just hilarious as a narrative tool LOL like i love studies in cross-platform behaviors/attitudes and seeing how authors navigate the kind of inherently unreliable nature of structuring a narrative through these microblogging microcosms. ok sorry i'm rambling

i highly support the lilyfication of oscar piastri because i truly think that would basically just be him if he weren't a driver!!! 🧡 i had an old concept of oscar being lando's longtime secret bf and like a normie programmer who takes up baking over quarantine but i think i privated the post because i didn't like my style anymore and now i can't find it... t__t nevertheless my vision was VERY similar to yours! like he has an inscrutable private ig page with 35 followers and his facebook pfp is a photo of him from when he was 12 and fans figure out that he's australian because they hear his voice on stream a few times but other than that he remains a mystery...

another hc i have is that in general if oscar weren't a professional athlete then he wouldn't be one of those corporate go-getters and instead would be perfectly satisfied with having a normal, low-responsibility job that's well-paid but not like in a high managerial position. because oscar is lazy and expends only as much energy as he needs to sustain himself!!! HLKSFDH so in my head he's perfectly satisfied with being lando's wfh househusband... brings cookies to quadrant shoots and somehow gets roped into being a model for their upcoming merch drop in which he looks absolutely terrible because he has never posed in his life. maxf is like mate these are ridiculous but ofc lando is still obsessed with him.

i feel like at some point he'd get hard launched in a proper stream or quadrant video except no one introduces him as lando's actual boyfriend so everyone like 1) is obsessed with oscar's dryness and the way he teases lando and 2) immediately ships them to lando's amusement and oscar's bemusement. help NOW YOU'RE GIVING ME FEELINGS!!! i feel like this is nothing on my end so i apologize deeply but i'll keep thinking things up and see if anything else strikes my inspiration 🥰

also love this real canon wag lando image but that is not the prompt here 🧡

[itshansolo]

My review of The Rise of Skywalker

Spoilers aplenty under the cut

I can fully acknowledge that my opinion on this movie is heavily influenced by what I care about in Star Wars. Han and Leia are my favorite characters and I just wanted to feel satisfied with how they ended up. Was it ideal? No. But given the choices made at the beginning of this trilogy, it could have been worse. Number one on the list to satisfy me was the redemption of their son. I had little doubt that Ben would turn back to the light, but I wanted it to be meaningful as well. Falling down a pit never to be seen again was definitely not it. His final act was beautiful and selfless and Adam Driver sold the shit out of it. What a fantastic actor. He did the most with few lines and his entire demeanor changed when Ben left the dark side. A moment that I haven’t seen many people refer to was when he said to Rey “You can’t go back to my mother. Neither can I”. His voice was choked up. In the beginning of the movie, when he touches Vader’s helmet and interferes with Rey’s training, you can see that the visions of Han’s death shook him up and the change in Adam’s facial expression was incredible. The scene with Ben and Han was everything I ever wanted since The Force Awakens. The main reason why people seemed reluctant to accept his redemption was because he killed his father and that baffled me. Han would want him to be redeemed! Both text and subtext showed that he deeply regretted what he did. So yeah. I’m very glad that scene was there. Ben loved his father. Period. So let’s address the elephant in the room. Reylo. It’s no secret that my preferred scenario was for them to be siblings. Back in 2016, I wrote 40 pages on why it could and should happen. But it didn’t and I got over that two years ago. Though I never shipped them per se, I thought there was undeniable chemistry and I never quite got all the pearl-clutching over the concept. It’s fake and in space after all. Everything about them in this movie made me feel things, in no small part thanks to Adam and Daisy’s phenomenal acting. I understand why Reylos wanted Ben to live, but let’s be real. Redemption followed by a life of atonement, though immensely interesting, requires way more time to be told as a story and they were trying to wrap things up. Not to mention it’s the definitive way to bring closure to the Skywalkers, making sure that no future writers will do anything else with the members of the family. Don’t get me wrong, the powers that be didn’t HAVE to end the Skywalker story, but it’s what they wanted. I appreciate that Leia played a role in Ben’s redemption (again, phenomenal acting from Adam), but I don’t quite like how she died. It seemed random. Why did she decide to reach out to him all of a sudden in that particular moment? There was no build up, she just felt weak and dropped dead. If they had showed from the beginning that she was in a fragile state, it could have worked. After a lackluster characterization in The Last Jedi, I finally connected to Rey again. I loved her struggles and her fears. Daisy’s acting was vastly superior this time around. Though her bickering with Poe felt forced, Finn’s relationship with both characters was a highlight. I’m not sold on the dynamic of the trio, but the humor mostly worked, especially from C3PO. He was the MVP of that part of the story. Speaking of Finn, I’m confused as to what his arc in the movie – if we can call it that – was heading towards.  He wanted to tell Rey something, maybe about his Force sensitivity, but it went nowhere. His past as a stormtrooper wasn’t really explored as promised, just briefly addressed in what I suppose was a bonding moment with Jannah. I’m not exactly sure why John Boyega was so satisfied this time around. As for the new characters, they were definitely a miss for me. Jannah and Zorii added very little to the story and General Pryde could have easily been replaced by Hux if Rian hadn’t turned him into a comic relief. Lando’s return was completely neutral. I felt nothing. He was there to deliver smooth one-liners meant to get people cheering. Everything critics have been saying about the pacing is true. There’s absolutely no room to breathe. Some people claim JJ was rushing to overwrite what Rian did and I couldn’t disagree more. There was one particular moment that felt like a middle finger to The Last Jedi and that is Luke catching his lightsaber and saying it should be treated with more respect. Aside from that, the biggest difference between TLJ and TROS is the tone, not the story. Even Rey Palpatine kept the message that Rian was trying to convey: there are things more important than blood. If I’m being quite honest, I much prefer Rey Palpatine to Rey Random, because it at least connects Rey to the previous trilogies. I still don’t like Rey Fauxwalker, but I ran out of fucks to give at this point. So why was everything so rushed? It’s just the nature of the story that JJ tried to tell. He wanted an adventure with the heroes and lots of action and that’s what we got. He’s not a very imaginative man. Although I – to quote Mark Hamill – fundamentally disagree with a lot of Rian Johnson’s decisions, I have much more respect for him as a filmmaker. While I agree with the critics about the pacing, I’m at loss as to why they think there is so much fan service. What the hell are they talking about? Ewoks? Indistinguishable voices from random past Jedi? Like I said before, if anything this movie has the potential to displease practically every fan. Ben dies, Reylo happens, Luke’s role is very brief, Anakin was nowhere in sight and a case could be made that his sacrifice was disregarded. The discourse surrounding this trilogy has poisoned the debate. People are now seeing digs at Rian and fan service everywhere. The most glaring issue with this film – bar none – is Palpatine’s return. He’s back just because. He’s back because Rian didn’t get the memo that if anything was settled from the beginning of this trilogy is that Kylo was not the big bad. So in a way, the biggest problem with this movie wasn’t even its fault. It’s the fault of everyone involved, for not mapping out the story. Once the space battle started, I tuned out. I have no idea what happened there. I’m not sure why Finn and Jannah split from the group and I honestly don’t care. I’m trying to understand why Anakin and Ben weren’t in the final scene with the twins and… I’ve got nothing. I still don’t know where the film ranks in comparison to the others and I won’t know for a while. Overall I think the mixed reactions are fair. As a final random note, I can’t believe Jodie fucking Comer is Rey’s mother!

[metalgearkong]

Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker - Review

12/20/19  ** Spoilers

Directed by JJ Abrams (Lucasfilm / Disney)

Among the current social media and the 24 hour advertisement cycle, if you wanted, its possible to piece together much of the plot of this movie, or any big blockbuster these days. Its for this reason I avoided every single piece of media about Star Wars: Episode IX The Rise of Skywalker before I saw it. Even when bombarded with Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, TV ads, and movie previews, I successfully dodged all snippets of the movie in order to be as surprised as possible once I sat down to see it. That night was tonight, and it’s felt like a long and arduous two years since The Last Jedi. Once again I have deeply mixed feelings about a new Star Wars movie, but I enjoyed myself more in The Rise of the Skywalker than I did in The Last Jedi, but not necessarily for shakesperian reasons.

The fans were worried about how The Rise of Skywalker would turn out, and as release day approached, reviews were already negative. I accidentally saw a Rottentomatoes critics score in the mid 20′s, and several videos were already uploaded to YouTube giving away that broad opinion of this film. This concerned me, as even critics liked The Last Jedi, which is one of my least favorite Star Wars movies. I let all of the negativity brush off me like a blaster bolt on Beskar armor. I went into The Rise of Skywalker rooting for it and looking to find every positive it could bring being the ninth main installment of the Star Wars saga. I was also ready for this trilogy to be over so everyone whining online could move on and obsess over something else. In an odd, semi-genuine, and semi-ironic way, I had tons of fun in The Rise of Skywalker, even acknowledging its horribly messy and rushed script.

Each of these Star Wars movies to me is like how a new chapter in the Bible would feel for a Christian, and the theater is my house of worship. The series’ trademark title blasted onto the screen among roaring trumpets, and I was ready. My auditorium applauded as the Star Wars logo shrunk to the background and the opening crawl appeared at the bottom of the screen. Seeing a new Star Wars movie in the theaters is always a holiday for me. Each film is a new addition to the lore of my favorite movie universe of all time, pulling from years as a kid before I can even remember the first time I saw it (thank you parents). This movie had me grinning from ear to ear, bringing out that inner child in me that Star Wars always used to do, something The Force Awakens partially did, and what The Last Jedi failed to do completely.

JJ Abrams continues his pension for fast paced scenes, but somehow still containing a ton of charm. We finally get to see Poe Dameron (Oscar Isaac), Finn (John Boyega), Chewie (Joonas Suotamo), C-3PO (Anthony Daniels) all working together on the same mission. The characters have a ton of charisma between them, and it inspires me to think of the potential for them having been together more often in this trilogy. I enjoyed their quips and didn’t think it got out of control or relied too much on bathos. The first half of this movie moves like a racetrack, as our heroes move from one location to another pursued by the First Order enough to almost make me dizzy. This would turn out to be a running issue with the movie, and if JJ Abrams and the editor would have let each scene go a little slower and last a little longer, it would have been more appreciated.

Kylo Ren (Adam Driver) is the Supreme Leader of the First Order, having murdered and usurped Snoke (Andy Serkis) in the last film, and is on a personal quest to track down what may be the resurrection of Emperor Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid). The movie opens on this note, and having none of it spoiled ahead of time for me, found it to be intriguing and exciting. The Emperor is one of the best and most fleshed out characters in Star Wars, and I was curious to learn how he resurrected. Unfortunately the movie barely gives an explanation and we are simply left with the spectacle of what I call Necro Palpatine. However we do have it explained that Snoke was a mere puppet of Palpatine in some capacity, but we aren’t told to what extent, or any other kind of logical backstory. It both answers and raises more questions simultaneously, about both dark lords.

The Rise of Skywalker also goes out of its way in several places to help explain some of the more controversial elements of the prior film, and I appreciated it as a fan of the series who felt toyed with in The Last Jedi. It’s obviously a wink wink to the audience, but I’d much rather have it than not. Greatest of all was Luke (Mark Hamill) being redeemed, as he admitted he was not only wrong to go hide on the island, but toss his father’s lightsaber over his shoulder. The movie also tries to shoe-in more explanation of what Luke was doing after his Jedi Academy was destroyed, which included trying to find the Sith Wayfinder along with Lando Carissian (Billy Dee Williams). It’s not a great explanation of why Luke disappeared, and I wish this was clearly the plan from the beginning of the trilogy. The Wayfinder is basically a key to get to Exegol where Palpatine is hiding. It becomes Rey (Daisy Ridley) and her friend’s mission to find the Wayfinder, through various means and mcguffins. 

John Williams and the London Symphony Orchestra returns one final time scoring a Star Wars movie. I heard a dozen of his old tracks throughout the film and I had fun naming as many as I could. For how much I love his leitmotifs and listen to his music ad noaseam, whether its giving me an emotional rush during a run or driving on the highway, I couldn’t recall any new music heard in this film. The first thing I did when I got home from the movie was try to download the soundtrack from Spotify but it wasn’t available yet. I still give this movie a big thumbs up for its soundtrack because although it isn’t new, the way Williams’ music is used and where it’s placed gave me goosebumps every time. Hearing Rey’s theme in just the right moments made me happy, and identifying other leitmotifs and variations of them were great to hear.

The acting all around was excellent for a Star Wars movie. Daisy Ridley as Rey is as great as she’s ever been, and the same goes to Adam Driver as Kylo Ren. All the side characters and comic relief did a good job as well. The banter between Finn, Poe, and C-3PO was a treat as well. Tony Daniels continues to be one of my favorite actors in all of Star Wars for conveying as much personality as he does without facial expressions and very limited movement. McDiarmid as Necro Palpatine gets very little screen time, but he’s hamming it up as the evil Emperor he’s always been, and I loved every second of it. I also deeply appreciate that the movie seemed to rely on puppets again, and one of the stand out side characters was a tiny engineer named Babu Frik (Shirley Henderson) who should have had more time in the movie.

The only “yikes” moment I felt was any time we saw Leia. It’s such a tragedy that Carrie Fisher passed away so unexpectedly, and least of all not able to finish this Star Wars trilogy. I listened to her audiobook The Princess Diarist and she seemed so excited, yet nervous, to be yet again the role that made her famous, and to complete episodes 7, 8, and 9. Her face seems to be animated on a stand-in actress, and her only lines were from old footage that was never used in Episode VII or VIII. This means Leia has very little to say in this movie, and probably had a lot less to do in the plot than she deserved to. The CGI simply wasn’t convincing for me and is the only aspect of the movie that put a lump in my throat for all the wrong reasons. On the flip side, Han Solo’s cameo was a terrific scene that also had me teary-eyed. It was a great call back to The Force Awakens, and served a purpose for Kylo Ren’s character. Harrison Ford did a perfect job, and it was just the sort of scene I didn’t know I wanted.

While much The Rise of Skywalker feels hastily cobbled together, and relies on way too many conveniences for the plot to keep moving, I found it to be a very satisfying time. You know that feeling when you’re extremely tired and almost feel drunk, and everything seems hilarious and flippant? That’s how I felt during this entire thing. I could see ridiculous script elements that either contradict or ruin lore left and right, but I think something inside me was just so happy to finally get this trilogy over with. I let the fan service envelop me even if it didn’t make sense or feel justified. Yes Rey is still a Mary Sue, yes we still got an underwhelming lightsaber duel (that she wins), yes there are too many characters, yes the plot and details can be nonsensical, yes this movie needed way more time to bake in the oven. But unlike a Jedi’s weapon, this movie may not be elegant, but it is a cathartic and satisfying experience, which is all I every hoped it would be. Now can we all take a breath and move on?

6/10

[qqueenofhades]

so…now that we all know what you DISLIKE about star wars (and 400% fairly so, you have my full support here)…

what drew you into the universe, what keeps you around?

favorite characters, ships (OTPs or actual spaceships lol), overall themes, do you have a favorite random weird creature or robot that you adore? whatever you wanna talk about!

go off honey (again, but supportively 💖💖💖)

tax paid: the very nerdy star wars punk vest i made and the even nerdier matching vest i made for starsky

Lmaooo, entirely valid. You were like "star wars?" and I was like the drunk person at the bar who can't stop shouting about how much their ex sucks. But now that I have gotten all that off my chest, let's talk about why I love it (since if I didn't love it, I wouldn't have such strong opinions). Basically my feelings on the OG SW trilogy are similar to my feelings on the OG LOTR trilogy, as that tumblr post floating around somewhere put it: sure, they have flaws, but also, they're perfect. I have a complicated relationship with the prequels, as do we all, since George Lucas cannot write dialogue or direct actors to save his life (stick to what you're good at, George, hire other people to do the rest), but even they have their moments. Like. Hit me with that "Across the Stars" love theme, John Williams. Gahh. Just like that.

Because... Star Wars wasn't actually this omnipresent corporate global entertainment monolith when it started out. It was a dorky low-budget indie sci-fi film in the 1970s which everyone thought was going to bomb. But it told a simple and compelling story in an interesting way, everyone agrees that ESB is one of the best films/sequels ever made, and then ROTJ gave it a happy ending while it was still okay to do that. My main thematic gripe with the Disney trilogy (I will try to keep those to a minimum, lol, but I have to bring it up to compare) is that it very clearly fell into the "actual happy endings are naive and unrealistic and a cynical postmodern audience won't accept anything less than things being Bad" trap that, yet again, we have GOT to thank for. It obviously existed to some degree before that, but GOT blew it up to huge levels, where the only valid situation or character is that which is Grimdark and Depressing. Which, in my view, misses the heart and soul of what SW is all about??

Like. ESB is genuinely dark. ANH was this fun plucky little sci-fi film where the scrappy good guys won the day against the Nazi stand-ins, as they were supposed to, and then ESB comes along (speaking of John Williams, let us all chant together, DUH DUH DUH DUHDUHDUH DUHDUHDUH, DUH DUH DUH DUHHHH DUHHH DUHHH DUHHHH) and things go... wrong. Leia and Han are on the run for most of the movie, then get captured and tortured by the Empire and and betrayed (however unwillingly) by Lando. The Rebellion is attacked on Hoth (I tell you, those fuckin AT-AT walkers were SCARY when you see it as a young kid for the first time), and forced into hiding. Luke loses his hand, doubts Obi-Wan and Yoda and realizes that his mentors are fallible, makes dumb mistakes, and of course gets hit with The Most Famous Line In Movie History. But it's also just adrenaline and excitement. THE ASTEROID FIELD! THE HAN-LEIA BANTER! THE FIRST LUKE-VADER DUEL! THE FACT THAT YOU HEAR TWO FRICKING NOTES OF THE IMPERIAL MARCH AND YOU'RE JUST LIKE OH YEAH OH YEAH OH YEAHHHH!

But also then... Return of the Jedi. It gets shat upon for the Ewoks and reusing the Death Star as the Big Bad and being supposedly cheesy and not as Thematically Dark as ESB. Which is all kinda silly, in my opinion, but also, can we talk about Luke Skywalker's character arc and how he chooses possibly the most radical compassion ever demonstrated by a hero in an action movie, let alone a space opera. He insists that Anakin Skywalker is still in there somewhere and puts his own neck on the line to prove it. Luke doesn't save the galaxy by being a Badass Jedi. He saves it by throwing away his lightsaber and saying "I will not fight you, Father." He saves it by trusting that even in the depths of darkness, Anakin can come back from the charred ruins of Darth Vader and finally do what he was supposed to do all along. He can end Palpatine for good and all (we don't talk about "Somehow Palpatine has returned" because it's nonsense, obviously). Anakin can avenge the Jedi and what was done to him and all the lies he believed and the pain he wreaked on the galaxy, even then. It's not too late. It's not too late. Like. I don't care if this is Lightweight or Childish or whatever. It makes me CRY every time I watch it. Especially the moment where Luke takes off Anakin’s helmet and sees how ruined he actually is under there, and yet the downfall and death of the trilogy’s chief villain is not triumphant at all but instead utterly heartbreaking. “You were right about me Luke... tell your sister... you were right.”

Excuse me, I need to just /CRIES INTENSELY/

Luke won't be tempted to the dark side for his own sake, but Leia's ("If you will not join me, then perhaps she will"). I likewise hold firmly that Anakin/Vader is one of the best movie villains/antiheroes of all time and likewise have many feelings and Strong Opinions about his arc, prequel writing clumsiness and eye-rollingly tepid love story aside. (See: he and Obi-Wan were deeply in love and in a way they still are, don't @ me. I have no problems with Padme and obviously stan Natalie Portman at all times, but Anakin and Obi-Wan’s relationship is the real love story, the heart of the prequels, and in some ways even the subsequent movies, the end.) And “so this is how democracy dies, with thunderous applause” is... raw af as a line. For being in a Star Wars prequel movie. What?? (Also, the Revenge of the Sith novelization had no business being as good as it was. If only that dude had also written the movie.)

Anyway, my point is: the OG trilogy had plenty of moments of staggering emotional weight and where things genuinely sucked for the good guys and the outcome wasn’t entirely clear. The difference is that it didn’t choose to dwell on them, and it allowed for a transformative fictional space where a happy ending, fiercely fought for and squarely earned, was the right outcome. We didn’t need to go back thirty years later and make everything suck for fear that a cynical modern audience couldn’t connect with it otherwise. (Like I said, we didn’t need the new movies at all, but Disney heard that Cha-Ching of the Almighty Dollar). Star Wars was sci-fi, sure, but it also had the fantasy elements that allowed a happy ending to be the right choice for what we saw the characters go through and the philosophy that carried us through the original trilogy.

Likewise it’s just... Peak as far as dynamics go. C-3PO the fussy metal butler who worries about Everything and R2-D2 who is the droid embodiment of YOLO? Flawless. Sassy scruffy space pirate and badass politician warrior princess bicker constantly, butt heads, drive each other crazy, and then fall in love? Iconic. (And has shaped my ship tastes for... all of eternity, oops.) The above-discussed transformation of Luke Skywalker, whiny ordinary teenage kid, to the truly great man who fulfills what Obi-Wan, Yoda, AND the rest of the entire Jedi order couldn’t manage to do, because of their own flaws and blind spots and black-and-white moral views that didn’t know what to do with a man who loved as passionately as Anakin Skywalker, for better or for worse? The guy who managed to save the galaxy with love? STAN.

So... what? The Disney trilogy decides to retcon all that, throw everything that they’ve fought for out the window, make Han, Leia, and Luke miserable and rejecting the roles they grew into in the original trilogy, and die without ever really reuniting or seeing each other again as a trio? The underlying message was that “these happy endings aren’t satisfactory/realistic/sophisticated enough” and idk, maybe it’s just the shitshow of the last few years, but I’d like to see some entertainment that had the cojones to tell me that despite all the darkness and despair, maybe there’s a chance for hope. (”Rebellions are built on hope,” thank you Only Valid New Star Wars Movie Rogue One.) And Rogue One worked so well, despite being utterly GUTTING as all the heroes died one by one, because we knew what was coming next (A New Hope) and that their sacrifice was going to be worth it. I don’t care if that’s “realistic” or not. As I’ve said before, that’s what stories are for, and if I only wanted things that were Real Life, I would only read the news. Besides, the idea that happy endings never happen in reality is equally bullshit. We as a culture need to accept that more, instead of finding reasons to tear everything down.

So just... yes. The original trilogy might have flaws, but also, it’s perfect. And do I want to rewatch it all now? Kinda.

(Anyway. I warned you this was gonna be long. Oh look, it’s long, and I’m sure there is even more I could say, but still. Ahem.)

sleepover weekend asks