#one day i’ll find out how...
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Repair day
#day 3 for vashtember#prompt was robot arm so I wanted to draw something softer#djdjdkdoe I was supposed to finish this on the third but unfortunately life happned and I couldn’t be bothered to post it yesterday to uhhh#but yeah I like how this turned out lol#it got so lazy toward the end rip#if yall say anything abt that janky ass hand I’m going to eat you#like I spent so long shading them face and hair but when I got to the pants I was like man fuck this#the goal for these drawings is to try and help me find a new rendering style since I was really not happy with my last one#still don’t rly know what I’m doing but I’ll get there lmao#Trigun#trigun maximum#trigun manga#Vash#vash the stampede#my art#trimax#Vash Trigun#Trigun Vash#vashtember#Trigun art#Trigun fanart
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[start i.d.: a drawing of lark and sparrow oak done in yellows and blues. in the foreground, in their soccer uniforms, they lean back to back with their arms crossed. they’re smiling, colored in yellow and framed by a gold explosion shape. behind them, faded in the color of the background, are their adult selves looking out vacantly. end i.d.]
you’re just a boy you are no man and nobody you know will understand
#dungeons and daddies#dndads#lark oak#sparrow oak#my art#digital art#this palette and kinda style was inspired by someone on tiktok but I can’t find it :[#I’ve been relistening to odyssey and mannn I miss them#would love just a big document explaining what happened to the kids between s1 and 2. how did we get here#one day I’ll figure out a good halftone technique
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#tried to post this 7 TIMES#and it’s not even how I intended it dear lord#I wanted to talk about those times you open tumblr and you see people talking about de and you’re just like this meme#but I literally could find the words to make this meme the way those people would#I literally became a meme IN THE MEME#so just so those people know: y’all put me in awe and I’ll suck your knowledge out of your brain one day#enjoy#disco elysium#notice the little heart with Kim on the cover btw
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Hey!! So turns out a video I made between a certain “well beloved but highly sensitive/emotionally reactive T.V” and an “orange haired inkling-turned-human” has managed to sweep my YouTube channel and accumulate 100k VIEWS!! THAT’S A LOT OF PEOPLE ACTUALLY?? My most widely viewed video EVER to exist in this moment in time?? AAAAA?? Not even mentioning the various comments and staggering increase in subs! It’s so much more then what I expected or even prepared for—might even be the most impactful thing to happen for me this year <3
…aside from graduating high school + the social connections I’ve been fortunate to make lol
BUT THE POINT IS I’d been closely monitoring the YouTube growth through the entirety of October. It’s make me smile like a dork, gawk in astonishment, dance frantically in my room from the energy boosts, and grow courage to stop being so selective/self-conscious with what I wish to share with the world! It’s kept my ambitions going!
I needed to find some way to celebrate the occasion and express my thanks—because I can’t NOT acknowledge this milestone jksjskp. Typically I try to avoid getting tunnel visioned focusing on the metrics/numbers. Mr. Puzzles had already demonstrated how much those things can mess with the minds of creatives. Caring too much about chasing views or placing your artistic value in attention seeking gets damaging. But at same time…it’s hard to deny the sense of pride the 100k achievement has filled me with. I understand that reaching 100k views doesn’t immediately make me any “better” or “worse” then I was before. I’m still just me! It only helps me feel seen by others—and that’s all I really needed. To hear some nice words & receive reminders that my ideas are cared about. So thank you SMG4 fandom for that, seriously thank you.
Please accept this Mr. Puzzle drawing as a way of sharing the happiness around. He’s so entertaining. Love him for simply existing. So glad we can all collectively be super attached to him (and the rest of the SMG4 cast of course). Can’t wait to see more incredible artworks from the fandom :)
Just incase anyone is confused by my vague description over which “animated video” I’m referring to here—hopefully this photo will help clarify lol. It’s this one!! Sorry about not outright stating the title at the start, I got carried away with writing!!
I’ve been in an odd place mentally when thinking about it. Wondering to myself if any of the attention is deserved considering it’s not even fully colored and could be dismissed as “low effort” content (despite taking several days making it). It’s easy to get into a trap of comparing yourself to others and questioning how much of the videos success is based on your skills, sheer algorithm luck, or only because you used popular characters and catered to a specific fandom. And then judging yourself by looking at other peoples videos. I’ve seen several artists post higher quality works then my own but it somehow gets less views. So why did mine succeed when others (who should have gotten just as much attention if not more) didn’t? Sometimes you feel like you’ve unfairly robbed them of that chance to be seen. However I’ve realized that I can’t ever expect views to be consistent—and comparing is pointless. So why worry about it or feel inadequate? I mean it’s pretty common for funny cat videos to go viral, so who am I to question the system lol. “Popular” YouTube videos can range from a passion project which took 7+ artists…to a clip of Toad singing Chandelier or a nonsensical Vine sketch. Anything can happen when it’s the internet! And just-so-happened my video was chosen. I should stay glad about that and get rid of all the overanalyzing. So that’s what I’ve chosen to do :)
#OKAY SO SO SO actually started doodling this once the video was around 98k this morning#it wasn’t even meant to be art specifically designed to celebrate the milestone at first#I just wanted to draw the funky fella who makes me laugh#but as you can see that changed up fast jksjksp#I was under the impression that my video wouldn’t reach near 100k until December UH?? WHAT HAPPENED MY PREDICTION THWARTED??#seems I’ve severally underestimated how long the traction would continue for geez wow uh#people sure do enjoy comedy gotta love ‘em laughs and giggles#I CAN’T BELIEVE WE REACHED IT THO. THAT’S INSANE TO ME—ALL THE SUPPORT AND COMMENTS AND SUBS#thank you SMG4 fandom I would’ve never fathomed the algorithm to carry it so far like this#you wanna know the real kicker?#things would have gone so differently for the channel if I didn’t wrestle with my anxiety & post there#because there was a point during that day where I fullheartedly figured it would cause me to loose subs#I was kinda terrified ngl#this goes to show that you should never hold yourself back from sharing different aspects of your interests#you don’t need to confine yourself to just one thing#or to strive only to make the most high quality videos ever (I put that pressure on myself a bit too much nowadays)#sometimes it’s the simple ideas that manage to charm people#and those who see the effort will stick around to support you. You just need to trust yourself during the process and take that chance :)#EWWWW MUSHY GUSHY SENTIMENTALITY CLOGGING UP THE ATTENTION HERE#whatever happened to keeping the focus on ✨the star✨ who made it all possible to begin with huuuu??#show a bit more gratitude to the charming TV who boosted the viewership in the first place…don’t be so self absorbed with morals lonesome 😒#what is this some sort of My Little Pony episode oh pleaseeeeee 🙄#<- all of that was a simulation of Puzzles interjecting and nagging a bit lol. I’d imagine he’s tried of my nonstop nonsense#….yea the Puzzle brainrot is reaching maximum severities. So there’s high chance I’ll be animating him more down the line :3#stick around to find out!!#hplonesome art
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sometimes i’m fine. and then other times i’m thinking abt meg’s death scene
#the way phil is holding her hand to comfort her as she’s dying despite them having#a bad relationship through the whole film :(#and then how hercules just holds her when he finally gets there :((#one day i’ll write a longer post about my deep and unasked for thoughts about#megs relationship with death#because i find it so interesting#* ━━ out of character.#but MAN#she deserved so much
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Sorryyyy for dropping off the face of the earth; got kinda shy after that last post but mostly I’ve just been writing though I cannot guarantee that any of that will ever be finished (also I’m very insecure about my writing AAAH). Figure I might as well post the valentines I had done (like two months late lol); interestingly this turned into more of a hand lettering exercise than I was expecting lol
#len’en#yabusame houlen#suzumi kuzu#tsubakura enraku#haiji senri#art#digital#there was one more but I’m not confident it’s like. funny? and I have stuff I’d eant to change abt it#and these four have pretty good comedic timing as a set so I’ll just leave well enough alone#also had plans for a Kuroji and uhhh Xeno a but those haven’t panned out#you’ll have to excuse me I’ve been going off the rails and also have not fixed the meds situation (I’m completely out atm)#started like four fics; yes they are all suzutsuba and there is. so much sex (not described/on screen but STILL)#didn’t manage to stay away from Hamal Cine Bad End either jfhshsjfb#too nervous abt talking yo pol rn to leave comments but zaranthropy if you’re reading this I owe you my life#also I think I said I was inspired on something by dissociation constant and then when chapter 2 came out I relized it was something I had#completely misinterpreted but I’m too embarrassed to actually go and check lol……#*talking to ppl sorry I had to turn off my autocorrect cause it was being compeltely unreasonable#OH YEAH also this Haiji design was a little bit inspired by a redesign of them from uhhhhhhh who was it. idk most of their blog is gone but#I’ll go check my likes#anyway I like how they tuned out also that joke came to me several days after valentine’s and gave me the idea for this whole thing#edit: can’t find the post anymore for some reason but I think yhe name was like chiosu or something?#did somebody go delete their blog while I wasn’t looking
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So I finally found the time to read Chapter 5 + the Hades event of What in Hell is Bad? and AAHHH LEVIATHAN?!! God, his character is so interesting and I can’t wait to see more of him.
Idk I just find his personality and cold attitude towards MC quite refreshing. Not to mention that he has such a lovely voice and beautiful appearance…….aaahhh he’s so intriguing <3
AND LEVIATHAN’S H SCENE?? Let’s just say that my inner sadist was very happy with how it turned out. Honestly, we need more characters who are masochist + power bottom ψ(`∇´)ψ
#jessamine rambles#spicy warning#mdni#i’ll be honest tho. i may be the only player who was relieved/ neutral about whb’s uncensored stuff being limited to the erolabs version#if only bc i rlly dislike looking at errr…..certain body parts in both 2d and irl. idk i’m more of the ‘let’s artfully cover this body part#with angles or a random item covering it.’ mayhaps it’s one of the little aspects of me being somewhere on the gray ace spectrum#but that’s a topic for another day skskk#re: leviathan’s attitude towards mc. i just find it delightfully realistic in the same way that twst handles mc’s relationship with the cas#i.e. the twst boys don’t fall head over heels for yuu nor become close to them#idk i used to play obey me! and got burnt out by how the focus on romance affected the story quality + how some characters were written#so maybe that’s why whb’s leviathan appealed to me. that and it simply makes for an interesting dynamic between him and mc#and i do hope that whb gives us more sub! or masochist! characters bc AHHHH WE NEED MORE#as an S. i was fcking delighted with leviathan’s scene#anyway that’s all from me re: whb xD
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I hate when something sad happens and all I want is to go spend a week out in the country away from where I heard the bad news like somehow being away from home means the Bad Things can’t reach me. It’s literally just running away. I want to lay at the bottom of a moving river (not dead, not drowning, a secret third thing)
#venting and loathing#he had two days of being married. two.#I’m so tired and I keep getting these waves of anguish and anxiety and I can’t find music CHILL and SOOTHING enough everything is too FAST#my joints ache so much lately too. I feel dreadful.#sometimes I feel like I take my anguish and misery and out it and myself into a glass case. and then put that case in a public space.#isolated. but visible. I have such a hard time showing emotional pain around others (even and especially loved ones) that it just ends up#being like this. I’m leaving post it notes in the hallways of my blog.#in time I’ll find this post again maybe and I’ll cringe at my own vulnerable state and how I bled personal things all over my space.#my hip hurts so much. but I’m alive. I’m alive. I’m alive.#I can’t give up today. because tomorrow might be the best day of my life.
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I’m like Johnny Truant in the tags of every goddamn post I make or reblog on this site and I’m not apologizing. If you want me to apologize come over to my house and you can talk to the minotaur about it
#House of leaves#im literally going insane these days I should go back to journaling but I’m also afraid of how far off the deep end I’ll go#Literally I am losing it and I’m being serious#I’m so fucking tired of being lonely and being left out and not being able to make connections#Sometimes I feel as if im doing things without realizing and no one is telling me about it#Other times it feels like I must have something incredibly wrong with my face or body and no one will say anything#People make plans and don’t bother to ask me if I want to join and then when I find out there’s a group chat that all my friends are in#Except me and when I asked if I could join I was given a bunch of reasons that were frankly bullshit why I couldn’t join#Are they talking shit about me? I know everybody there it’s not like I am a stranger#Am I just a stranger in this world as I unllikeable? I try my best to be nice and charitable but what am I missing?#Do I black out and say things and do things? Am I more mentally ill than I know?#The only reason (or one of the very few) why I stay alive is because of my horses because I know they would miss me and I already feel bad#Not seeing them everyday#I’m tired of being the odd one out I’m tired of being entertaining when necessary#I don’t want my only friends to be horses because it further alienates me from the rest of society and I just want to be accepted I’m not#Looking to fit in I just want connection and friendship and I can barely seem to manage that#Maybe I’m just not worth it.
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I love the sims 2 because it will completely wreck your shit right when you’re least expecting it
#i’ll set the scene for you: i’m doing the prosperity challenge (basically a challenge where you create a number of completely randomised#families and you play them in rotation. rules vary but generally the goal is to make all your sims as successful as possible#and it’s meant to add some variety and drama to the game)#so i’ve played through the first four families which were all some variation of either grandparents or teenagers looking after kids#just because that’s how my rolls fell. so i got to the last house which was just one adult man and i was like okay.#i JUST need an heir out of him. just ONE. and things were going great! he already had a boyfriend (the random uncle of the first family#i played realllly liked him and i was like ‘this might as well happen’) so i had them try for baby. then his dream job (slacker lol)#came up in the newspaper on the FIRST DAY and he kept getting promoted! i also had him adopt a stray dog i thought was cute#his pregnancy went unbelievably well. he only passed out while eating one time. i allowed myself to be lulled into a false sense of security#and then mans ✨WOKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND GAVE BIRTH TO QUADRUPLETS✨#look this is honestly on me for downloading the triplets and quads mod. i don’t even know why i do it. just for the risk factor?#regardless there was only a 3% chance for this and yet it STILL happened. on the first birth in the neighbourhood no less!!!!!#bear in mind this man is living in a 2 bedroom starter home; has one paycheque (GROCERY STORE CLERK) AND he’s just spent a bunch of money#on his new dog. and we can’t exactly sell the dog’s stuff because it’s essentials#i managed to find the money for 4 cribs and a nanny fucking Somehow. and then carnage ensued#i don’t think this man bathed for 3 days. i got the dog a job and then realised it got weekends off so wouldn’t be going#aging them all up into toddlers aged ME. i think they’re technically classified as some being a day older than the others but idc#i’ll rectify it at the next birthday. or at one of their birthdays anyway#it was just SO messy. next rotation should be better though??? i had him marry the kids’ other father (who is an elder so will probably be#around approximately 5 minutes) who bought in exactly £5 but at least there’s an extra person to change diapers and get bottles#i see a lot of nannies in these kids’ future i fear#personal
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It’s not that I’m concerned about my job performance, I consistently get good feedback, always finish my tasks, have taken initiative on a couple projects…
But my coworker is always talking about how much of the online training he’s doing once we hit the mid-afternoon quiet period and I’m slightly worried they’re going to be like ‘hey why does [redacted] have so many hours clocked on [redacted training platform] and you have like, none?’
And I’ll have to be like. Well. I was writing star wars fanfiction.
#yea this is the same coworker who’s always complaining about being bored#well run out of our to do list and just be running out the day or whatever#and he’ll be like ‘well time to watch training videos’ and I’m like oh well#I’m going to write#no one’s ever mentioned like ‘why aren’t you doing these training videos’ so im sure it’s fine#also like…yeah I know how to use excel so#obviously I wouldn’t actually tell them I’ll find a nice HR friendly like ‘thank you for bringing that to my attention#I’ll be sure to invest more hours to that specific task’#but no until someone says something I’m writing fic#or reading it on my phone lol
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I was thinking about Dilton’s insane garage laboratory again, and I got an idea for a comic. I would draw it, but I draw so slowly that it would take forever to finish a 6+ page comic, and I have too many other ideas to work on. So all you get is a written summary:
— Dilton’s dad hears from the other parents (or the newspaper) that multiple cars have been broken into or stolen in the past few weeks, and he decides the family needs to keep their car safely in the garage instead of the driveway, at least until the perpetrator is caught.
— He informs Dilton that this means Dilt needs to clear all his science stuff out of the garage to make room for the car.
— “You want me to dismantle my lab? Dad, please, don’t do this to me! Anything else!”
— “This isn’t a punishment, it’s just how things have to be for the foreseeable future. Your lab was our garage first, and we need a garage more than we need a lab right now.”
— “But how can you expect me to transport all of my equipment within the day? Where can I possibly store it all? How can I continue my experiments under these conditions?”
— “Why don’t you ask those friends of yours for help? I’m sure they’d be more than happy to lend a hand. That boy Moose, especially, should be useful in carrying your computers around.”
— So Dilton asks the gang for help, and they agree to help him clear out his lab, as well as each taking a portion of his science stuff to look after (there wasn’t enough space in Dilton’s room for all of it). They also agree to keep Dilton’s experiments going themselves, in small ways like taking notes on observations, or adding three drops of such and such to this concoction each day… etc. They’re all excited, thinking it’s going to be fun to try their hand at mad science for a while.
— Next comes a series of little Disasters caused by Dilton’s science in the hands of his inexperienced friends over the next few days.
— One of his friends ends up drinking some sort of potion (or multiple), either on accident or on purpose, and there’s some kind of weird effect—I’m not sure what yet, but almost definitely a minor transformation of some sort, on the same level as turning green or growing a tail or only talking in parrot squawks. This causes humorous problems in their life. (Jug wouldn’t drink unknown potions on purpose, because he has common sense, but Archie has none, so it would make more sense for him to do it intentionally.)
— One of his friends has to look after some animal test subjects, like mice in cages or something, but it turns out the animals have been made superintelligent, and they break out and start sabotaging the character with clever plots. The character fights back, mostly unsuccessfully, and things descend into Tom & Jerry territory. (I think this would be funny with Jug, especially since Hot Dog could be there too, animal vs animals.)
— One of his friends (maybe Betty?) has to look after a robot, and all seems cool and fine until it malfunctions (not her fault) and turns evil or chaotic and starts destroying things. (Its glowing eyes turn from green to red, so it’s clear that it’s evil now. This was an intentional design choice on Dilton’s part, as a warning sign in case of malfunction, and because it looks cool.)
— Veronica is given something she doesn’t need to observe or use, just store somewhere and not mess with. But at a fancy party, she tries to show off to her rich friends that she’s smart as well as beautiful and wealthy by showing off ”””her””” cool new invention, and she turns it on. She immediately loses control of it, whatever it does, and it causes a Disaster. This one’s working correctly, but Veronica doesn’t understand how it works or how it turns off, so it’s still causing a problem. (Hmm… maybe a weather-creating machine? Imagine a blizzard packed into a ballroom.)
— (Midge and Moose also helped Dilton, so I need to think of two more disasters. Or maybe, since they’re closer friends to Dilton, they know a thing or two about science and following instructions, so they don’t do anything they’re not supposed to, and they happen not to meet with any malfunction-type accidents. Everything goes fine with them.)
— The comic ends with Dilton’s dad reading in the newspaper that the crook who was breaking into and stealing all these cars has been caught and put in jail. He says to Dilton that this means their car is safe (because problems are very simple in this world), and so Dilton can have the garage back for his lab. (Let’s say it’s been like a week since the start of the comic.) Dilton is excited, and says he’ll go find his friends right away and tell them, and get his science stuff back. He rushes out the front door, only to find all his friends running up his sidewalk together, all carrying the science stuff he gave them and begging him to please take it all back! (Dilton is surprised, because he had no clue about all their problems, but everybody else looks like a wreck from their individual ordeals. This is all in stark contrast to how excited they seemed in the beginning to take on the science.)
— The end! That last scene was the punchline and final panel.
#I think this plot would fit really well into the way these comics are written#so much so that maybe they’ve already done a similar plot and I’ll look like a copycat#whatever#archie comics#dilton doiley#I love how Dilly has these massive computers and advanced robotics equipment and etc etc with no explanation of where he’s getting it all#like is he rich???#I don’t think you can find this sort of stuff at a thrift store#it’s just one of those things that works on cartoon logic and never gets explained#sure he has more computers than nasa#sure he casually invents groundbreaking technology over the weekend#sure he could whip up a conspicuously glowing potion that can do literally anything#this is just what every A+ student is like#totally#this is part of why I like The Day Riverdale Turned Green so much#because he somehow has like a whole huge batcave of science hidden under the town#walls of colorful vials? sure. dinosaur skeleton just hanging out? why not.#but for some reason the fact that he just suddenly had a jetpack near the end took me completely by surprise#jetpack jumpscare!#guys I’ve gotten my 4.0s and my A+s so where’s my jetpack?#i want to mix some vials of mysterious liquid together and make invisible paint!#I want to create impossible things#(…guess that’s why I’m an artist…)
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Hrrrmnnng I have so much to do but I’d rather be playing and hanging with friends and drawings and organizing things I see into different aesthetic categories…,,…
#and sleeping honk shoo….#but no I wanted to apply to a new job so now I have to figure that shit out 😒#it’s so wild how I’m the laziest person ever but I’m also a perpetual motion machine that won’t stop finding things today even when I’m#*to do#fully given time to do nothing but rest#also applying for insurance or whtvr#and if I do get the job I’ll have to go on demand and that’s already so 😵💫#and then the actual training process for the new job mannnnn#I could be doing fuck all rn what’s wrong w me#I also wanna get the global entry or pre check or whatever I feel like that’ll be rlly good for the future#and I finished cleaning up my room but it’s not as clean as it could be…… I need to be hit with a tranquilizer#and then talking about moving not just out on my own for the first time but eventually potentially out of town/state….#let me sleep please I’m begging#like I know it’s necessary to progress in life but man cmon#maybe one day with my riches I’ll pay someone to make and carry out these life changing decisions for me#*takes a long drag from cig incorrectly*
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It’s strange, I’m used to hyperfixating hard on things like HARD (beats my 2yr long beetlejuice musical obsession back with a stick) but Starbreaker- not even fantasy high itself took me over to the point of feeling like a teen about. Like I haven’t had this much fun in fandom in years. I haven’t like- interacted with people this much in fandom in years (which is still not enough but if I beat myself up about social interaction again I’ll jump off a cliff)
But there’s never been a concern of like “this obsession won’t fade for a while but it’ll lose popularity” and that’s fine and surprisingly it hasn’t. But it is different. It’s like adapting to it constantly as the thing itself changes even when there are aspects that you’d like to stay the same. Like that ‘I don’t go to this school of thought, but I’ll still take the class bc it’s interesting’ sorta thing.
And then there’s that feeling of WANTING to contribute but the thing has become such a beast that it’s like oooh I’m so out of my depths here.
Also like constantly having to look myself in the eye and be like ‘bitch you don’t have to talk or contribute to EVERYTHING’ and the sooner I accept that and accept that it is what it is, ill miss things, I won’t get enjoyment out of every aspect and every aspect isn’t for me and that that isn’t a bad thing, I’ll stop having moments of feeling weird and out of place. I have my lil corner and that’s okay
#ngl I think the biggest ‘culture shock’ ig about being in fandom is that tagging systems have changed so much or something bc I’m used to#walking in a tag and that’s where you find everything#but now it’s different#things are tagged wayyy differently and it means missing things or setting aside time to go down a list to check every blog#I dunno#I always feel a little weird about main tagging sb stuff now bc I’ll check the tag and it’s like oh? things are slowing down#but it’s like nooo bc of tagging and different lanes entirely I’m just missing stuff#idk what this is I’m just talking but it’s strange#I think I’m bad at fandom and that defeats the purpose of it bc it’s recreational#it’s supposed to be fun.#it’s /supposed/ to be fun#I saw a post the other day of someone that’s in this purely for Jace and having similar feelings of being out of the loop and it got me#thinking bc on some part I’ve contributed to it and I’ve probably clogged tags#but the lizard part of my brain that gets the dopamine boost from getting a note is like if I don’t main tag it won’t be seen#but truly either way I am mostly talking to myself lmao#so yah know? idk it should be fun#idk what this is and idk if I’ll fully ever commit to a different/quieter tagging system#bc tumblr is the place I got to scream and be annoying without being told it’s too much and some how I’ve convinced myself that on my own#blog and fandom spaces I enjoy that I’m just annoying#and I don’t wanna think that#I think I’m tired. like hyperfixation hasn’t died but the part of me that’s hungry for being completely consumed by it is tired#my one fear is that I’ll be so annoying that my fic will finish and no one will care#which isn’t true bc I’ll care until the bitter end lmao#idk I’ve talked so much that I’m like oh I’ve done the thing again I should shut up#also this is too like- self focused way too self focused#which just makes it worse bc then I’m like that’s what got me in this mess#but goddamn there’s just so much shit I’m missing out on and interactions I’d like to have but about things that I’m out of my depths on#so it made fandom a little lonely and a little secular#feeling like a kid on the outs#I want that feeling to die especially about the things I love
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i decided to try to 100% mondstadt’s areas and i’m honestly starting to believe that 100%ing starfell valley is impossible i have been searching for HOURS
#genshin impact#it’s going to be 98% forever i give up#im so annoyeddddddd#how do people have the patience for clearing regions like this it’s driving me nuts#i have been massacring every single thing in the area for days trying to figure out what chest or whatever is eluding me#i am waving my white flag#giving it all up#the secrets win😔#maybe one day i’ll go back to spend 8 hours on it to find one chest and get to 99%#rip
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there are two wolves inside you
one spends most of its time around reasonable, decent dudes who you get along with. it’s sometimes repulsed by people who hate all men and demand a women only world because that’s cruel and unfair
the other goes to work and wants every single man you work with to die immediately. all of your shifts with women only are fantastic snd wonderful but the second a man is introduced he causes a million problems.
#in literally ANY OTHER SPACE i can find a reasonable dude. but work. WORK.#i found one guy i got along with and she came out to me as a trans woman the next day#being a trans man is really funny when you also hate men#they gotta put me on tv i’ll make the republicans see how much it isnt a choice#do you understand what i would give to feel happy doing girly things with girls#no. instead i gotta wish to chop wood and look like a triangle
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