#one boyfriend making the other boyfriend beg

[reader6898]

@rexxdjarin

Look at our boyfriends 😭

lovers

[pacofprunes]

DARK / TOXIC SQUID GAME REACTIONS TO YOU TRYING TO LEAVE THEM

CONTAINS — namgyu x reader, thanos x reader, myungi x reader, inho x reader, sangwoo x reader, saebyeok x reader

WARNINGS — toxic relationship, domestic violence, baby trapping, manipulation, guilt trip, prepare yourself for namgyus that’s the worst probably, mentions of suicide (thanos)

masterlist

THANOS / PLAYER 230 / CHOI-SUBONG — manipulates you / would let you leave and crawl back to him

doesn’t take it well at all. he’s going to laugh and think you’re joking, but after realizing that you’re not, he’s quickly going to scream at you. telling you that you’ll never find anybody better than him.

“do you really think anybody else will want you? if you leave me you’ll never find anyone else. you’ll never find anybody better!”

he’ll start breaking shit. punching walls, shit, he’ll even break your own phone if it’s in arms reach. if you still insist on leaving he’ll say he’s gonna overdose. he tells you that he’ll kill himself if you step out that door while pressing a blade up to his arm. if all else fails, he’ll totally act like he didn’t just beg you to stay and scream at you to go then and not to come running back.

“fine bitch, go ahead and leave! but don’t come running back to me for nothin’.”

in reality, he’s definitely stalking your socials, making fake accounts you haven’t blocked him on, stalking your friends accounts to see other photos of you, visiting the club every night (not that he didn’t already do that) to try to see if you’d show up. after about a month or so of doing this and going out and fucking other girls to get over you, he can’t do it anymore. he’ll send you some fake heartfelt text that he probably used ai to make and call you while making himself sound like he was crying, trying to make you feel bad and convince you that he’s changed and that he can be a better boyfriend. if you fall for it, you’re doomed. the relationships only going to be a million times worse than before. instead of knocking glass over and breaking shit, he might slap you. in public, he might grip your wrist ten times tighter, scared you’ll run away. when he finally lets go, his fingers will be embedded in your skin. he might even guilt trip you into getting a matching tattoo with him. “if you really loved me and forgave me then you would.”

if you really don’t go back to him though, no matter how many times you block him, you’ll get a new video sent to your phone from some unknown number of him fucking a new girl. he sent you the videos in hopes of making you jealous or something. he’s not going to stop for a long time. if you don’t go back to him, he’s going to harass you for the rest of your life. and if you do go back? you’re in for a world of hell.

NAMGYU / PLAYER 124 — would threaten you, would actually harm you

“you’re one funny bitch. you know how much shit i got on you?”

he finds it admirable, honestly. but still, fucking hilarious, that you, you, think you can leave him. what? when did you grow some balls? yeah, no. you just hurt his ego and that’s about the stupidest thing you could ever do to him. he’s not very empty with his threats. if he says he’s leaving? he’ll leave. (for like a week…) if he says he’s gonna hit you? you’re gonna be bruised for a while. if he says he’s gonna kill you? well, you haven’t gotten to that point yet. but keep this up and you sure will.

he keeps every nude and threatens to release it. sure you’re his and all, but that doesn’t stop him. so what if some other guy sees your body? he could care less. now if another guy touches you? let’s not think about what would happen. threatens to send the pictures to your family and threatens to send every sex tape of you two that he filmed behind your back.

“what the fuck is wrong with you namgyu? when the fuck did you film that?”

don’t raise your voice at him. once he hits you and you fall to the ground, he’ll keep kicking at you with his foot over and over until he thinks you’ve had enough. don’t speak up to him, don’t speak against him, and don’t piss him off. just sit there and be pretty, okay? he’s going to be bolder now. next time you two have sex he’s just going to shove the camera in your face. he’s going to manipulate and force you to take nudes for him since you don’t want to anymore after he threatened to send them out. sometimes he’ll force you to strip and then he’ll just take the pictures himself. all in all, sometimes he might just say no and leave it at that. but if you keep pushing, he’s going to threaten you. and if you still keep pushing, he’s going to go through with those threats. you really are just some whore to him, don’t think he’s above killing you.

MYUNGI / PLAYER 333 / MG COIN ★— would let you leave and crawl back to him (except he’s the one who crawls back), babytrapping

“really? fine, if that’s what you want then leave.”

he acts like he doesn’t care because he thinks his annoyance will make you turn right back around to him. he acts like he doesn’t care because he’s trying to not get so bent out of shape about it and move on quickly. but when he hears your footsteps disappear and the door shut, he immediately balls up his fists. you seriously left? he didn’t expect that, but whatever. he doesn’t need you.

he tries to move on but after barely even a week, he can’t do it. he contacts you, but when you block him, he makes more and more numbers. he thought you’d be running back to him, not the opposite. he sends you pictures of you two together in hopes you’d change your mind, but when you just keep blocking him, he’s knocking on your door demanding you open it up. he tries being nice but when you don’t open it, he starts banging on the door. really? you’d been together for months and you’d already gotten over him? no. no no no. you don’t get to just move on! what the hells wrong with you? when you still don’t open the door, he leaves and goes back to his place and sits on his bed while he ponders his next move. he decides for now just to stalk your page and harass you from more and more numbers. he’s not going to stop until you at least respond. oh, you’re gonna get a restraining order? you’re funny. you think that’ll stop him? don’t go back to him. if for some reason you give in, the next time that you two have sex, he’s going to make sure that you can’t leave. he’s sure that you’ll look so pretty with your stomach swelled up.

INHO / YOUNGIL / PLAYER 001 — straight up says no / baby traps / makes you feel like you’re going crazy

straight up, no. you want to leave? no. he doesn’t even care for an explanation on why, you’re not leaving. completely ignores your words and changes the whole topic. everytime you try to say you’re leaving he just completely overrides you with something different.

“inho, i’m serious. i’m leaving you! i’m packing my shit right now and i’m not coming back, i swear to you.”

“what did you want for dinner again? i have to go back out to get some groceries so there’s not too much…”

maybe it’s on purpose, maybe it’s not. but it makes you feel like you’re losing your mind. then he will deliberately go out of his way to make it seem like you’re crazy.

“i’m leaving because of what you’ve been doing behind my back, inho. it’s fucked up and you’re insane.”

“baby, you could follow me around tomorrow. i’ve got no idea what you mean.”

and he says it all with that stupid small polite smile that he gives everyone. you just want to strangle him. if somehow he can get you in bed with him after you just got so pissed, he’ll be more passionate than ever. he’ll treat you nice, focus on your pleasure before his and then quickly when you’re blissed out, he’ll pull out of you, slip the condom off and slide right back in. you don’t notice at all, but he makes sure to tell you like the cocky fuck he is. but he does it while he’s thrusting and when you can tell he’s about to cum. poor you, it’s too late to stop him :(.

“i’m about to fuck a baby in you — agh, i — i took the condom off. gonna have a beautiful—fuck—fucking baby with you.”

how could you leave now? do you have enough money to take care of a child without him? and would you really deprive your child of their father? you’ll get an abortion? he’ll find a way to keep you locked up in your house. you’re still going to leave? he’s going to guilt trip you to the max. and if that still fails? once again, he’s just going to find a way to keep you locked up in your house. he’ll figure it out as you go on, but for now, have your happy little family with him.

KANG SAE-BYEOK — straight up says no

she’s not going to entertain you at all. she might not even say no, opting to just stay silent instead. if you get in her face about it because she’s ignoring you, she’s just going to push you away. if you keep nagging her about it, she’s going to slap you. if you decide not to drop it, she’ll drag you by your hair and lock you in a room. are you stupid? don’t start this shit first thing in the morning.

“saebyeok, this isn’t working. we should go our separate ways.”

“no. did you hit your head or something?”

you should just drop it and move on with your day. nothing you say is going to convince her and if you piss her off too much, like said before, she’s just going to lock you away until you stop sounding ‘crazy’. she’s very cold, but she’s generally pretty nice to you still though. she’s a good girlfriend to you, just a little possessive, but it’s never gotten out of control. you just didn’t think the relationship was working and that it just wasn’t the right time. all in all, if you don’t push to much, you won’t see the shitty side of her that she never shows you. however, if you keep pushing the idea, she’s going to give you a real reason to break up with her.

SANGWOO — would let you leave and crawl back to him

“you want to break up? fine.”

it leaves you shocked at the sound of him not caring. it was as simple as that. you want to break up? bye then bitch! it hurt. it almost made you want to change your mind and say never mind and just stay with him, and that’s exactly what he wanted. that’s exactly why he said it like that. but that didn’t work and you just walked out the door. that’s fine though, you’d come back to him, he knows it.

he makes sure to post old photos of you two on his Instagram. not ones with your face in it, duh, but he posts the photos that you took of him where you’re behind the camera or ones where your arm or your hand is slightly showing. he knows you still stalk his socials. he’s posting these knowing that it’s going to hurt your little heart and make you crawl right back. he leaves every photo of you two up on every platform, not deleting a single thing. for a little while, he even keeps his pfp the same. you two holding hands. whenever he posts something, he always makes sure to put something in the caption that he knows you love. you liked tulips? he’ll put a tulip emoji in the caption. you loved cats? he’ll put a cat emoji in his bio. all these subtle things where you won’t know he’s doing it on purpose, but it’ll be so much of a coincidence that you’ll think this is a sign to run back to him.

he’ll tell his friends to ask about him to you whenever they talk with you.

“how are you and sangwoo doing?”

“oh he talks about you all the time.”

he tells them to act like they don’t know that the two of you have broken up. he makes sure to get in your head and eventually? you’ll come running back. if for some reason you don’t, he might have to pull some strings. spread some rumors about you so that your friends want nothing to do with you and so all that you have to run to for comfort is him.

[svetamillss]

Headcanons: their reaction to the fact that you asked them to obey you during sex🫦

Featuring: Cho Hyun Ju x Reader(f), Park Min Su x Reader(f), Thanos (Su Bong) x Reader(f), Gang No Eul x Reader(f), Nam Gyu x Reader(f)

Warning: NSFW

A/N: It was written in classes at the university!😭

🫦🫦🫦

Cho Hyun Ju

Usually your girlfriend is the main one in bed, but it happens that you really want to be the main one. When you ask her to obey you tonight, Ju doesn't resist, she likes to watch you control her embarrassedly and incompetly. Ju like when you try to flirting to point her out.

- Baby, your face is so cute, I can only cum by looking at it. - the girl teased you when you ordered her not to cum.

- Ju, stop embarrassing me! Because of you, I'm leaving my role!

- I'm silent, I'm silent, baby.

Still, you like it better when your girlfriend orders you, so you rarely offer her to change roles.

Park Min Su

Your boyfriend is literally a timid rabbit, he is very shy and gentle in relationships, so you take the main role, both in ordinary relationships and in bed.

It doesn't bother both of you, because the guy literally has a fetish for you to order him to do something, but without any humiliation! You two don't like it at all! Everything is nice and very tender with you!

- Honey, do you know how you can please your beloved girl?

- What should I do?

- Give me a cunnilingus, and then I'll reward you.

You never force him to do something against his will, if he doesn't like something, he'll tell you right away.

Thanos (Su Bong)

No, no, no. Don't even think about asking him to obey you during sex, he will refuse you with a laugh. No matter how much he loves you, he's not going to agree to such an adventure.

He believes that a man should not lay in front of a woman, even if he has a strong love for her, so don't even think that he will agree.

And if you suggest, he will bring you to five orgasms, after which you will forget about your idea.

- Now I'll get this fucking dope out of your head, baby. So that you don't offer me to obey you anymore. - he said almost always when he stuck his dick in your pussy.

Gang No Eul

With her, also don't think that she will allow you to subjue her. She won't respond to your request with laughter, but will only show who is really in charge by fucking you well.

No Eul is not used to obeying anyone, no matter a girl or a guy, no matter she loves much or not, she will not allow herself to be subordinated to anyone.

And she herself understands that you like it better when you humiliate yourself in front of her, and all your ideas are just a small performance.

- My love, I love you very much, but let's be honest, you like to be humiliated by me and you like to beg to let you cum. So don't make an iron lady out of yourself, but let me give you real pleasure. - these words are enough for your panties to get wet, she knows you too well.

Nam Gyu

Your boyfriend is a good manipulator, he doesn't let anyone get to him, let alone allow himself to obey someone.

He is a very respectable man, the owner of the club, he is used to other people running in front of him on their hind legs and almost whining, as long as he would pay attention to them. And he only laughs at how pathetic they are and he will never descend to such a point.

But you are his exception.

You are the only girl, and in general, the only person in front of whom he himself can kneel and beg to pay attention to him.

So he does not refuse your offer to be a master in bed, on the contrary, he loves diversity in your sexual life, so he is ready for you to put a collar on him and give commands, he is ready for anything for you.

- Good boy. Good Gyu.

🫦🫦🫦

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

[2:24 pm]

(cw: f!reader, suggestive, profanity, written on my phone so expect some typos)

“Baby, are you sure your big gave you permission to drive his car?” You asked fratboy!Jaehyun, eyes on him as he drove.

“Sweetheart, he basically begged me to take this baby for a spin! He asked me to water his plants, feed the dogs, and asked me to make sure the car was alright! A car like this needs to be taken out on a regular basis!” Jaehyun explained, his eyes not leaving the road ahead of the both of you.

Earlier today when Jaehyun had told you to come to the frat house, you hadn’t expected anything out of the ordinary. Even when he’d told you to make sure you were dressed up, you didn’t question it. It was pretty safe to say that you definitely weren’t expecting to see your boyfriend waiting for you while leaning against a Maserati! A sleek and shiny luxury car that had you wondering if cars were actually sexy like guys always talked about.

“Please don’t tell me you took out a loan for this. I know guys find cars sexy, but you’re smarter than this. Did you mix alcohols last night?” You asked with concern clear in your tone.

Jaehyun waved you off with a laugh and explained that his big, a major donor to the frat, had asked him to house sit for the week. That’s how you’d gotten here, in the leather passenger seat of the fanciest car you’d ever been in and on your way to a restaurant equally as fancy.

This restaurant Jaehyun had insisted on taking you to was about half an hour from campus, so while he focused on the road, you were in charge of directions. At least you were supposed to be, but how could you possibly focus on the screen of your phone when your boyfriend looked absolutely scrumptious behind the wheel?

He was in a crisp dress shirt, a bow tie around his neck with one hand at the top of the wheel and the other pinching his bottom lip gently while he hummed along to the song on the radio. “How far away is the exit, sweetheart?” He asked, looking at you from the corner of his eye.

“Huh? Oh, um…” you looked at the screen of your phone in your hands, “oh shoot. It’s rerouting. The next exit is in 3 miles.”

“Alright, thanks, Sweets. I made a reservation for this place so we can’t be too late,” he tells you, leaning over to give your thigh a gentle squeeze.

With his touch you feel your heart pound even faster, face growing hot. Did he even know what the hell he was doing to you? Touching you, taking you on a spontaneous date, looking like a model right off the runway, and just being the best boyfriend ever. He was everything you’d ever dreamed of, everything any girl dreamed of.

This effect he had on you was something else completely. So strong and intense that you’d now missed the exit you were supposed to take and the next 4 that followed. You even make him accidentally take the wrong exit a couple times because you glance at the screen right after you miss the exit you’re supposed to take and panic as you tell him to take the next one, even if it’s the wrong one.

Jaehyun groaned, trying to keep himself calm despite how frustrated he was feeling,“Sweetheart, we have 5 minutes before we lose our reservation and we’re 15 minutes away. What is making you so distracted?! It’s not hard to look at your screen, Sweets, we do it all the time.”

You flush with embarrassment, “baby, I’m distracted!”

“Distracted by what?! Sweetheart I’m going to have to break a handful of driving laws to make it to this restaurant on time,” he sighs tiredly, trying to hide his frustration with you.

He was trying to be spontaneous! How often did a couple of college kids get to go to a restaurant this fancy? Never. Since his big was paying him pretty handsomely for house sitting, Jaehyun had figured he could treat you by taking you out to the nicest dinner both of you had ever shared. This was a big step up from the usual diners and small food shops you usually went to.

“But you just look so fucking good right now! How am I meant to be looking at a phone when I would so much rather be looking at you? Seriously, babe, you look so sexy. I don’t know if it’s the dress shirt or you behind the wheel but something is doing it for me,” you confess with hot cheeks.

It’s Jaehyun’s turn to flush now, was the car hitter or was it just him? And then the next words that leave your lips have him wishing for the earth to swallow him whole. Very sweetly, very calmly, you ask, “do your think your big would know if we had sex in here?”

Jaehyun swerves the car, hearing multiple honks from his fellow drivers on the freeway. He swallows hard, eyes wide, “Sweetheart, you can’t just ask a guy that when he’s driving!”

You pout at him, reaching across the center console to hold his hand, “but you’re not just a guy. You’re my guy, you’re my boyfriend.”

“God, you’re going to be the fucking death of me, Sweetheart,” he sighs under his breath, then his back straightens and a smug smile comes over his handsome features, “I’m that distracting in a bow tie, huh?”

“Don’t let it get to your big head, take this exit,” you instruct with a playful roll of your eyes.

So that’s how you and Jaehyun find yourselves sitting across from each other with the finest food you’ve ever eaten. You have a happy smile on your face while you take another bite of the delicious food on your plate, and Jaehyun who sits across from you and wishes he’d never chosen a restaurant so far from home and chosen some looser dress pants. The things he does for you…

[amoristt]

the night falls like heaven

「 ✦nam-gyu/reader ✦ 」 tags: sfw // hurt/comfort, pining, nam-gyu's pov, lots of angst in an edgy way, very light drxg mentions,

a/n: this'll be a 2 part mini series! so excited to get this started ugh tysm to anon who requested this word count: 9.2k | songs i listened to (x) (x) original request (x)

・❥・Nam-gyu was not a man of many regrets. 

If he had to count, he could fit them all on one hand. Mostly from when he was a teen. Younger and somehow even more impulsive than he was now, drinking through money like water and getting into fights he’d never remember. The worst of them all, however, was one he hadn’t thought would really eat at him. It was unlike himself to get hung up over a girl of all things, but good lord, he was hanging. Strings and all, like a marionette, bleeding and sore at the joints. 

Tough to swallow couldn’t even compare to the feeling of when that specific regret suddenly pops up in the same room after years of abandon. If he hadn’t been so down bad, the sight of you would have only ruffled up his feathers enough to remind him of a better time, but in God’s honest eyes, those feathers of his had been ruffled since the dawn of the very instant you left. The door hadn’t even had a chance to hit you on your way out, nothing but dust and tears in your wake. He was stuck fast, left to his own devices, bouncing between wondering why he let it go so bad and whilst also begging God himself to make you stop being such a bitch. 

But the worst part, the worst part is that even now you still carry this aura of over it all around you. Self-respect colliding with the want to be loved was never an easy tango to dance, all steps just pulling and pushing and trying to snuff out useless feelings and red hot passion. But you twirled until he did what he did best and nudged you to the brink of your breaking point. All that sweet, sweet adoration drained from your face and he saw it- dignity. He saw it on you on your  way out of his apartment, storming past him with biting tears in your eyes. And now, years later, he gets to see it again from across the room.

You’re sitting on a high, high bunk you’ve claimed as yours, people watching. Other than the initial moment you’d seen him in the bubble of people, you haven't bothered sparing him a second glance. It was a beautiful moment- your eyes widening, stopped dead in your tracks before you were on the move all over again. He’s sneaking glances through the corners of his eyes, watching you over his shoulder, and you can’t even give him another second of your day. And the thing that really bothers him is that he knows he can’t stop. 

Out of everyone in this room, your distant presence is a fiery beacon in the darkness and he’s an angry, bitter moth. It’s in his very nature to circle and flutter one step behind, seeking the light, burning at its touch. Singed wings and an endless sneer. If only he could just stop touching the heat, he would surely move on. But he just can’t, and the fact that you can pisses him off so much it makes him lose his breath at times. 

He wished, with the very core of his entire being, that you were weaker. Or, at least, stupider. Maybe then you would have lived up to his expectations and showed up to his door, or at his club, teary eyed and lonely without his superior presence around. He could see it behind his eyes at night, the waver in your voice when you’d beg him to come back into your arms, and more importantly, back into your bed. 

I told you so, he’d say, with that shit eating grin and a hand on your waist guiding you out from the cold.

A forlorn, guideless sheep in need of your shepherd. He could be that for you. If only the word boyfriend didn’t make him shudder with every last fiber of his being. If only that specific little thing wasn’t your breaking point. Your face haunted him- that halo around your irises fading into something far away and charred when he’d had the nerve to actually laugh at you for it. You were grabbing your things and leaving, and he sat watching every moment in clips. It wasn’t anything, back then. You were just mad, in a few days you’d be right as rain climbing into his lap and peppering kisses along his throat. You’d be back, he was sure of it. 

But then the days turned into weeks. And then, to his distaste, those weeks faded into months of silence. He started to catch himself looking for you in crowds, visiting places you’d frequented at just to linger around like an awkward ghost in case he spotted you through the shifting crowds. But you were gone- vanished.

Fine. You’ll never see me again, asshole. 

Those words had been etched into the very walls of his cranium since they’d left your lips in a scathing hiss. Such nasty words, but they shook with every consonant. 

Among your pride was a healthy blend of honesty. You had been true to your word- he really did never see you again. Wiped your slate spotless of anything Nam-gyu.

And it drove him fucking crazy. It made him sick to his stomach in a way he did not think was possible. It was out of control- he couldn’t stop thinking about you, you, you. He missed you more than he didn’t, and he was angrier at himself than he’d like to admit. So instead of admitting, he funnels all that anger into the very shape of you. Drags in the idea of you, his memories of you and shoves them down, down, down, until he truly did think he hated you, after all. 

Until he’s clenching his fist so tight he’s drawing blood and telling himself he’s better off now, without some whining bitch in his ear begging him to stick that boyfriend pin into the thinness of his skin. Thinks that without you hanging on his arm all the damn time, he could really go out and have some fun. He thinks, and he thinks and he thinks until he’s thought too much and suddenly he loves you again and he misses you so bad it’s crushing him under the sheer weight of your absence. 

So, Nam-gyu does what Nam-gyu does best once again, and he drowns himself out with the bitter taste of drugs on his tongue and the sear of alcohol in his blood. 

It all stops.

For a time, anyway. 

You always found ways to seep back into his mind one way or another. Songs that would only make it a second in before he was mashing the skip button. A tv show you’d watched together surviving on the screen roughly a whole minute before it’s switched off. Sometimes it was when he saw something he knew you’d like- a shitty video or meme. Other times you came to him in whispers while he laid out on his own living room floor, out of his mind watching the blank ceiling above him twist and writhe under his spotty vision with a needle poking out of his arm. 

But, most times… Most times you would slither your way to the forefront of his mind just before bed. The touch of you, the smell of you. 

The shape of you underneath him. Hands and quiet breaths. He could still hear the noises you made ringing in his ears, stored away in his memories just to taunt him when he was indisputably alone. Soft skin, even softer thighs. Always so warm, and so wet. So willing. You would come to him while he curled over himself in bed, drunk on porn and memories. 

And afterwards, when Nam-gyu had finished, he would throw his head back onto his pillow and ignore the way it felt like there was a lump in his throat. And that would piss him off even more, because fuck, you should be there with him. Laying by his side running your hands through his hair until he’s falling asleep balancing on the fine line of afterglow and dozing off. 

But you aren’t. You’re doing fuck all with who knows in places he’s never been to, places you probably begged him to go but he couldn’t even remember the name of. You hadn’t answered a single one of his texts, you hadn’t picked up a single call and everytime he hears the first couple seconds of your stupid voicemail he wants to crush his phone in his hands. Vexation was a slippery slope into the fires of fury- rage was like a parasite under his skin, eating away at what little rational thinking he had. 

Voicemail after voicemail. Text after ignored text. Anger was the hardest stage- rage grew horns on the crown of his head and it turned him into something he couldn’t recognize. Or, something he refused to recognize- desperate and heartsick. 

It was supposed to be you. Not him. 

He filled the endless gaps of you with drugs often and women when he could. For a short time it would work and he would wonder why he ever let someone else get him so, so low. But then the drugs would wear off. The random woman in his room that he never bothered to learn the name of would grab her clothes and saunter out the door. He stopped letting them stay the night. He could never sleep, stared at the ceiling until 5am wondering why he still felt like shit. He would be right back where he started, sitting on the couch, staring at the door watching you leave over and over again.  

You stopped updating your socials, quit hanging out with the few people that bounced between his and your crowd, successfully scrubbed him of your life entirely. After a year, he resorted to asking around if anyone had seen you. The answer, as always, was a firm no. It was a corrosive feeling, a constant churn and thrum within the cage of his ribs. It made him even more unrecognizable to himself. Made him invite women into his lap just to shove them away when they didn’t smell like you, or sound like you. Or laugh like you.

It had been so, so perfect before. It was fun, and it was hot all the time, and sex with you felt like heaven was a place on earth. Why couldn’t you see that? Why did you have to go and ruin it with your words and pleading eyes? Nam-gyu doesn’t roll like that. You knew that. He’s a free spirit, he tells himself. No chains, no labels. No holding him down. Even if it was at the feet of this gorgeous, gorgeous body and a honey sweet voice that just always seemed to know what to say. Beautiful eyes that always watched, a smile so saccharine, whispering words against his ear so dirty it made him shiver just to think about. 

The world was too vast to be held down. 

But, truth be told, he was held down. 

He is held down. 

When you walked out of his apartment those years ago, he never left that spot, chewing his nails and anxiously spinning the ring on his finger, watching you go. He started seeing it behind his eyes. Replays it, changes the course, wonders where he’d be right now if he’d just said something different. 

Finding you at the games was like divine intervention. It had to be. Some higher power had crossed his path and plopped you right in front of him. With rolling eyes and a deadpan stare at anything except for him, sure but you were there and you weren't going anywhere anytime soon. God had heard his drug induced prayers of stupor. 

Now it was all about waiting. Waiting for the right moment to dive in and recapture you within him and he’d be right back to drinking you in at every chance he had. He’d do it differently this time, do it right so you’d cling to him and wonder why you ever wanted to leave at all. Make you wonder why you were so stupid to have been so stubborn when everything you could ever need was in the palm of your hand. He was sure of it. That strong, bullheaded expression would blitz is something vulnerable in his hands. A lurch of excitement riveted under his skin among the nerves. 

For now, he waits, and watches. Your presence could never go unnoticed by his dark eyes. 

It’s unfortunate for him that Thanos takes a notice to you, too. It’s hard not to, really, when every time he follows Nam-gyu’s locked line of sight it always leads back to you- this little sweet thing perched up at the peak of the bunks alongside the back, watching the room with this bored stare between mundane yapping with other players. 

“Someone you know?” Thanos’s voice had this subtle drip to it, this underlining excitement that Nam-gyu picks up on almost instantly. His expression stays cool, mostly uninterested despite the way he can’t seem to pry his eyes away from you even as he answers.

“Yeah.”

“Who is she?”

And then he’s stuck. Because his mouth opens for a split second to say, my ex, but he can’t quite say that, now can he? But he also can’t say an old friend either, because you simply weren’t. What you two had was something else entirely- a new plane he struggled to navigate, lovely when things were good, a hellscape when they weren't. The lines were always so blurred, fuzzy with sex and warm laughter.

He decides on something mostly true. “Someone I used to hang out with.”

“Girlfriend?” Thanos’s brow raises with his chirp, leaning forward with clear interest. 

“No.” It comes out quick- too quick, and too heavy. Tinged venom with more baggage than even he could handle at times. Thanos catches it on impact and whistles. 

“I see. So you won’t care if I go chat her up? Hm?” 

“Don’t bother. She’s not like that.” Nam-gyu’s scoffs before he can stop himself, this unsettling seed of jealousy planting itself in his chest. 

“Hm… I guess we’ll see, huh?”

You’re dismounting from your bed and climbing onto the stairs when Thanos jumps to his feet, and Nam-gyu can already feel that itchy panic starting to blotch away at his skin. His hands, his cheeks. That seed takes its place within him bearing vicious roots. 

“Man, don’t bother,” He’s touching at Thanos’s sleeve, his shoulder, anywhere he can to try and gather his friend’s attention. “She can be kind of a bi-”

All it takes is a swat to Nam-gyu’s chest to stop him dead in his tracks, words dying his throat. Shut down, watching his friend take quick steps to you, Nam-gyu following close behind to witness.  If only he could be firmer, never demanding, always suggesting. Always rolling over and showing his soft underbelly at Thanos’s whim. Instead, he lets his lips press into a tight line and let’s it all happen right before him. 

You’re on the bottom step and taking a seat, and you see the rapper approaching before he gets a word in, but your eyes skip over him entirely and settle onto Nam-gyu’s. Distress is building in his muscles, but he’s making damn sure to keep himself in check. 

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing all alone? You want a friend?”

Up closer now, sharing your space, he sees all the things he’d been missing so deeply throughout the years. You still look just as he remembered- still bearing this expression of bemused coolness, still having these all seeing eyes that seemed to cut right through him. 

“A friend?” you hum, and your voice threatens to pull him in like gravity. “You wanna be my friend?”

If jealousy could sprout through his skin, it’d be an ugly beast of horns and claws. But it can’t, so instead, it takes shape in the way Nam-gyu’s eyes are flicking between yours and the rappers, hands wrapped up in his sleeves. 

“Stick with me, yeah? I promise to keep you safe. My number one priority.” And Thanos is patting his chest, flashing those painted nails. Makes Nam-gyu’s chest tighten, his stomach growing sicker by the second. 

Damn, you can see it, too. There’s no denying the way he’s cringing behind that distant smirk, and he doesn’t think to hide the way he’s twisting his rings on his fingers. When you click your tongue, he knows what's coming. 

“Stick with you, hm… Sorry, but I try to work alone. Partner’s tend to, how do I say…” Those eyes of your slice through him all over again, honing into him when you finish your sentence. “Disappoint me.”

Fuck. Disappointment. Oh god, how that sears into Nam-gyu’s skin. The way you look the rapper up and down, visually sizing him up, would make his heart leap into his throat if he were under that same scrutiny. He never understood how you could always be this intense with such a sweet, sweet face. Kindness was certainly a luxury and he missed it, that never ending fire that kept him warm.

“I can change that for you,” Thanos sings.  “I’m a legend here for a reason.”

“Legend? I’ve never heard of you.” Your brows raise in amusement. 

“You will. Thanos.” He puffs his chest out and nods, a half cocked grin playing over his lips. “Guy’s like me, we don’t disappoint.”

The man actually finds the nerve to reach down and pluck your hand, bringing his knuckles to his lips. Nam-gyu feels red hot scorching through his face but he’s locked in place, watching it like a car crash. Relieved when you yank your hand free and shove it into your jacket’s pocket. It’s the only good thing out of this entire interaction, he finds, especially so when Thanos’s smirk falters into a tight surprised line. 

“Don’t go and do all that. Guy’s like you will always disappoint me.” You lean back against the wall of the step, vexation evident over your features. “How about you talk to me again after the next game, yeah? Maybe I’ll feel different. Thanos.”

You always were so good at slamming the door in people's faces, always brought Nam-gyu joy to witness you shut down the advances of some poor loser trying to gain your affections. Thanos knows he’s been hung out in the cold, too. Barking up the wrong tree in the wrong neighborhood in the wrong country. So, he takes a loose step backwards and shrugs. 

“Your loss.” He sighs, and Nam-gyu follows him all the way back to his bunk in brooding silence. 

Wringing his fingers, he can’t help himself when casts a glance over his shoulder to find you one last time before you’re obscured behind metal frames and moving bodies. When he does, he feels a rush of heat in his cheeks when you’re already stuck fast staring right back, watching him go. He’s silent when he sits down at his little corner of the dormitory, silent when Gyeong-su is harping praises at Thanos. Silent, even, when Thanos says he’s determined to bring you to his side of the map. 

However, he noticeably tenses when Thanos mutters, “What a babe, huh? I should go visit her after lights out.”

Almost immediately there’s hands on his shoulders, pushing and nudging him, demanding his attention. The deepest of sighs leaves the rapper, ducking his head to find Nam-gyu’s eyeline. 

“Come on, man. Don’t be pissed, it’s in my nature, boy. Be honest. You into her?”

“Me and her…” Nam-gyu swallows. “We used to mess around.”

“Lucky you.” Thanos’s is shoving Nam-gyu’s shoulders again. “You cut her lose?”

No, she cut me loose. But Nam-gyu can’t bring himself to say that, the words lost and barred at the tip of his tongue. In the silence, Thanos takes it as confirmation. 

“That’s so cold. If I had her, I’d never let her out of my sight. Sheesh.”

Nam-gyu can’t even form words at all, anymore, irritation and envy wrapping tendrils around his throat and snuffing him out. Your earlier words spin through his brain like a carousel- come find me after the next game. Were you being serious? Were you just saying that to mess with him? He knows you- he knows your tone better than he even realizes, but he suddenly can’t decipher what’s honesty and what isn’t anymore. Jealousy blinds him, thick lenses leading him in all sorts of binds. 

He should have talked to you. He should have made the first move and made sure the first time he was breathing your air was alone. Now he’s anxious, he’s resentful, and he’s humiliated for some reason he can’t quite place. It doesn't help when he can’t resist the urge to look at you one last time, just one for the road, and you’re chatting idly with a man lounging on the other side of the steps you’re currently sitting on. There’s a five foot gap between your bodies but Nam-gyu doesn’t care- the anger that rips through him is blind, you may as well have been fucking the man right in front of him. 

It’s all he can see, tunnel vision encompassing him all the way until the moment lines start to form for lunch. Stewing in his jealousy, a bitter taste blooming over his tongue, he doesn’t jump in line because he’s got an appetite, but simply because you were rather eager to fill your belly. He tails you, matches every step and still has to jump out in front of a random player from taking the spot directly behind you. 

You notice him with a fleeting look tossed over your shoulder, eyes darting from the corners of your eyes and then forward, still as a statue. Desperate to not interact. 

Nam-gyu can’t help himself.

“You into Thanos?”

You audibly laugh at him, and the sound makes him shred the inside of his cheek.

“Maybe. What’s it to you?”

Everything. It’s everything to me. 

You look up at him over your shoulder, watching him through your thick lashes with scorn written all over those beautiful irises. There’s a flash image of you- a memory, tangled between the bedsheets, looking up at him with those gorgeous eyes and tear stained cheeks with his hand wrapped around your throat. It’s quick but it hits him like a sucker punch right to the gut. He sucks in a sharp breath. He wants to touch you- he almost does, but the line moves forward a beat and you’re moving with it away from his hesitating fingers. 

“I’m just asking.” He’s trying to be coy, but you can see right through him. 

“You worried, Nam-gyu?” 

That hits him like a sucker punch too. He’d forgotten how his name sounded on your tongue, how it rolled off so perfect and pretty even when you were pissed at him. Sometimes specifically when you were pissed at him, this bubbling anticipation running through him in waves, your passion always the spark lighting the fire in his belly. 

“I’m not worried.”

“You are.” Clocked him, again. Peered into the windows of him and saw that angry ocean of spite and regret behind his eyes. “I know you are. I can see it on you.”

“Not worried.” Nam-gyu shrugs, but he can’t meet your eyes anymore. 

Another sigh ghosts from your lips, but it’s quieter, defeated, almost. 

“I’m not interested in your friend. I’m not interested in anyone.”

And then, he says it. Quietly, as if he doesn’t want you to truly hear.

“...You seemed interested.”

“So you are worried.” You’re crossing your arms and he stares down into your hair, shoving his hands into his pockets. “What if I was? You clearly had nothing to say about it. You were right there- you didn’t tell him we had history? Or did I mean that little to you?”

You’re mad. Holy shit, you’re still so mad at him. But then his brain scrambles to tell him the good side of things- anger is not indifference. So in some ways, maybe more than others, he’s still in that little dome of yours ratting around amongst your thoughts. Means that if he does this right, it would mean something to you to be better this time. 

His lips press into a tight line. He should have talked to you, and now it’s biting him in the ass. It seemed like everything always bit him in the end. And he always let it happen, watched and never interfered. You drive the nail you’d plunged into him even deeper when you throw his words, from all those years ago, right back in his face. That last thing he had said to you before you, or the idea of you, had become a black hole.

“You know what, Nam-gyu? What was it you had said? Oh- uh, why don’t you focus on yourself and I’ll focus on me, yeah?”

It stings. It stings so bad that he physically recoils from the sound of his voice on your tongue, words spilling that just don’t seem right coming from you. Bitter resentment rises in his throat, this reflexive coping mechanism to bite back overtaking his senses. He wants to say I shouldn’t have said that. He wants to say, hear me out. But what ends up leaving him is just as ugly as the rest of his feelings. 

“Jesus. You’re still a bitch.”

The very instance those words tumble from him, he’s already regretting it with every fiber of his being. Even more so when you pluck your bento box from the guard and spin on your heels to glare absolute daggers into the very pits of his soul.

“Get over yourself. I’m glad we had this talk, it was very refreshing.”

This time he does jump to stop you, shaking his head and squeezing his eyes shut. “Just listen-”

“No.” 

He doesn’t hide the way he watches you scamper off to your little ledge, hopping up onto your bed and enjoying your vantage point above all else, focusing on your meal. The man you’d been chatting with earlier is in the bed next to yours and that’s just fucking great. The guard has to pry his stare off of you, and a bento box is practically shoved into his chest, urging him out of line. 

Nam-gyu hates the stone anchoring in his guts. Almost as much as he hates how his appetite never quite returned. All food tasted the same when you left, nothing compared to what you’d used to make him. 

The bento box was no different. 

That night, sleep avoided him. There was something keeping him awake- buzzing under his skin no matter how many times he’d rolled over and shifted himself into a new position. Of course he knew what it was- it never really left him, after all. The fact of knowing you were across the room, all alone in your bed, was this incessant knock in the back of his skull tapping him back into reality whenever he found himself comfortable enough to doze off. His mind was stuck on you, as always, wondering what you looked like right now. 

Did you sleep the same as before? Laying on your side, hair messed over the sides of your face and splayed over the pillow, those heavy lashes of yours kissing along the bone of your cheeks. He always told himself that it was you who was attached, that he was some great being and you simply touched the stars through him. How wrong he had been to think that, when the entire time he’d fit so perfectly against you, he a piece to your puzzle. 

How wrong he had been, because when he’s staring up idly at the ceiling, he thinks of the better days in his life. Always, always, it was you. Thinking of you sitting pretty in his passenger seat, watching out the window as the world blurred by in rushes. The wind blowing through your hair, your necklace catching the glint of the sun. You’d feel his eyes on you and you'd turn and smile at him so darling, so lovely, that he thought it could heal. Remembering when you’d walk into a room, shining like a beacon just for him. You’d find his lap, find his hair, find his lips against your own and you’d cry his name like a prayer. 

He was an idiot to have thought he was the something in the nothing- it was you. 

Even when he finally drifted off into sleep were you still infecting the very membrane of his mind. In his dreams, you were just as warm as you had always been. Bated breaths, hanging onto every word that left his lips, fingers that longed to touch and stroke and feel. His heart slowed to a peaceful beat, and his body curled into his pillow and blanket, trying to recreate the shape of you in his arms. For a time that evening, it worked. 

But then he woke up, and Thanos was leaning over his bed asking him if he was dead, and all those wonderful moments he’d relived were gone in a rush of bright lights and endless chatter bouncing off the walls of the dormitory. Like an addiction, the first thing he thought of when he sat up, was you. Thought about you all the way through the winding staircases and into a giant room with rainbow’s painted over the hard floor. So lost in thought that he almost misses it when the speaker starts instructing them- a 5 player minigame race. 

Teams of five. Okay, he could do that. Easy. Gyeong-su, him, Thanos. That was already three. 

It’s natural instinct when he starts to search for you in the bubble of people, his fourth member, even though he’s more than sure you’re all too excited to send him packing. The way you had looked at him at dinner the day before, he wasn’t sure if you’d even entertain a conversation with him at all, let alone join their team. But this is beyond an argument- beyond him trying and failing to lull you in, this is life and death. 

“Hey, there’s your girl again.” Thanos spots you first. He follows Thanos’s line of sight and sure enough, there you are, standing with your hands shoved into your pockets with this far away expression he can’t quite read. 

His girl. It would make him shiver, if he wasn’t already on the brink of tweaking. 

“Let’s go see if she’s changed her mind.” 

Thanos is running his hands through his hair and popping the collar of his tracksuit, a particular bounce to his step when he bounds right for you. Just as the first time, always on the lookout for yourself, you spot him coming before he gets to you. Already you’re annoyed.

By the time Nam-gyu slithers up beside him, you’re already turning Thanos’s first wave of advancements down, a snark to your tone and a glint in your eyes. 

“I’m good, thanks though.”

Thanos blinks, looks left and then right. “You’re good? I don’t see a team?”

“I’ll find one.”

“You got one right here,” He pats his chest again, before he slings his arm over Nam-gyu’s shoulder haphazardly. “Come on. You’ll be safe.”

The intensity in which you roll your eyes is fierce- an expression Nam-gyu really had only thought he could draw out of you. To make matters worse for his friend, you don’t even bother with saying no again. Instead you merely wave a dismissive hand and turn on your heels, meandering into the crowd. 

“You were right, Nam-su.” Thanos’s face drops and he unwinds his arm from Nam-gyu’s shoulder. “Not getting anywhere with that one.”

Nam-gyu is so focused watching you, that all he murmurs is, “It’s Nam-gyu.”

“Yeah. Nam-su, Nam-gyu. Look over there.” He has to force himself to look away, following Thanos’s point in the other direction you’d gone. A girl with short black hair stands off to the side, eyes traveling and sizing up all her potential team mates. Thanos pops his collar again, a hound dog chasing a brand new scent. “Let’s go see what she’s up to.”

For the first time, Nam-gyu doesn’t follow him. He says, you go, you go, and lets Thanos wind himself up all on his own before watching him go. He’s much more concerned with you and your team, this sense of anxiety starting to bud in his gut. 

He finds you like a moth to flame. Your shoulders slump at the sight of him, tired and irked. 

“Not this again.” You groan. “What, do you think you’re gonna come sweeten me up and I’ll say yes? I’m not playing on your damn team.”

Nam-gyu shakes his head and steps in front of you when you try to turn away again. His nerves are on the rise, and so is his temper. You draw it out of him like nothing else, he can’t stop himself. 

“Why not?” He asks, looking down at you with furrowed brows. You cross your arms, barring yourself from him. 

“Because I’m not.”

“This is no time to be stubborn. You don’t know what the next game is. You might need guys on your team.”

“I plan on it. There’s other men here other than you and whatever the hell his name is.”

Other men. Nam-gyu’s mouth dries up, his fingers already wringing in his sleeves. His jaw tenses with his temper, teeth grinding. 

You didn’t need other men, not when he would do anything under the sun to keep you safe. Anyone else may just let you die. Can’t you see that? 

“Why are you being-... Being like-...” He stops himself. Holy shit, his brain actually fires off the warning shot and he stops dead in his tracks staring at you in bewilderment. You adopt this expectant glare, a spiteful uptick to your lips that darkens your eyes. 

“Say it.” You sneer. “Go ahead, say it. I’m being a bitch, right?”

The word fights against his lips to get out. You’re waiting for it, at the edge of your seat, fully ready to take it in and chew it up and spit it out right back at him. But he bites it back and he swallows it down into his chest because this means something to him. Because it might mean something to you. 

“Being like this.” He stammers. “I’m trying to keep you alive.”

Your eyes widen just a fraction. “Keep me alive?”

“Can you really trust anyone here? You know me.”

“I do know you.” A flash of something provoked and somber rivets within your eyes. Anger mounting, your heart colliding with your brain in real time right before him. “That’s exactly why I won’t be on your side.”

If he’d had his foot in the door before, you were properly shoving it back outside. He doesn't know what to do, so he does the first thing he can think of as a creature of impulse, and unfortunately when it came to you that meant he was all hands. 

“Wait-” He catches you just as you’re turning away, tries to bulldoze over your defiance and smooth out all the harsh edges of your protests with the broad flats of his palms. Fingers clutching your tracksuit at your shoulders and then he’s realizing that he’s touching you for the first time in years. Your skin from underneath your jacket is just as warm he remembers, your eyes are just as doe-like at his touch too. Stubborn and ornery but overflowing with passion and static energy that settled into his bones. He needs it, he needs it. The obsession of you hits him in waves of yearn. 

He needs you more than air, he thinks. 

“Get your hands off of me, right now.” But you aren’t tearing him away- so maybe that’s progress. 

“Come on.” He ducks his head, shoulders slumping, and it physically hurts him to feel this desperate. “Stay with me.”

Oh, you don’t like those words one bit. They hit your eardrums and your eyes narrow in slits, and then yeah, you’re reaching up and catching his wrists in his iron grip before ripping his paws off your jacket. It takes a long moment for you to speak, but when you do, he swears he can hear the devil amidst the heartache. 

“You know that I can’t stay with you. Never again.”

His hands twitch to touch you again- anything to keep you there for a moment longer. 

“Come on.” 

Sadness like pits swirl in your eyes, drags your lips into a frown. “You gotta’ stop Nam-gyu. I can’t do it.”

An awful, awful mass grows in his stomach when you turn your back on him. Gets bigger with every inch you build between you and him, threatens to take over entirely and swallow him whole right in the middle of that room. If it did, and he was to be gulped up by the void, perhaps he wouldn't have to feel like this any longer. And he wouldn’t have to watch you disappear behind all the moving bodies. 

He was weaker than he was three years ago. You made him weaker. Back then, if you’d been so sure of yourself he found it rather easy to deter you. A beastly way about him when he would have just ripped you by the hand and brought you over to his team and made you sit the hell down and just stay with him. Something possessive, something under his skin at the thought of you sharing the same air as anyone other than him. You used to be so malleable in his hands- but he knows, now more than ever, that that was truly never the case. You let yourself be pliable. You let yourself fall to him. He could never, not even now, make you do anything. Not really. 

That’s the part that burns him to the peaks of his soul. That strength about you. You’re so much stronger than him, with an energy iron so it’s like running headfirst into a wall when you’d no longer graced him with your softness. Such a double edged sword, that will of yours. That attitude and the passion made him feel alive. Cold and disposed after you’d properly slammed the gate right in his face. No leverage, no space for him in your heart any longer. 

It’s cold, Nam-gyu finds. Lonely without you. 

And then Thanos goes and invites some random girl with a poor attitude (that isn’t yours) and an even weaker buddy. He tries to tell him- remind his friend of the potential disadvantage but like always all it took was a dismissive wave to get him to screw his lips shut. Rolled over, tongue caught in his throat, weakened. 

He spends a majority of his time waiting for his teams turn arguing with Se-mi and tossing gazes over his shoulder to keep a very keen eye on you, only to find a sneer growing on his features after seeing you chatting with the same player as earlier, the man with the bed next to yours. Laughter and smiles roll from your lips as natural as breathing air, and he’s nudging you with his arm and you’re letting him with this expression of pure amusement. 

That should be him. 

That ugly face of betrayal peeks through the cracks all over again, with guilt and anger and regret following in tow close behind. Sitting on his shoulders like little devils, spinning and racing through his body in waves. If you saw his face- you’d never suspect it, but his hands shake in his lap. His jaw tenses so tightly his teeth could burst into powder. Squared shoulders and an endless drag to his lips. Something in the sight of you enjoying that guys presence is reminding him of all these shitty feelings he’d been faced with when you two were together- well, no, not together, he remembers- and then he’s even angrier. Angry at you, angry at that random ass player you were talking up, angry at himself for letting it get here in the first place. 

Thanos pops open his necklace beside him and draws a fun little pill from its contents, and Nam-gyu makes it a mission to get his hands on one of those sweet little pick-me-ups. The pill is bitter on his tongue but he swallows it down in delight. And it works, too, because the moment the colors start to glow and fuse together and all sounds become this echoing fishbowl of noises, you’re vacated from the corners of his fuzzy mind. For a time, he’s at peace all over again, lost in the blurry joy. 

By the time he comes down, he’s already back in the dormitory. 

Though it takes a moment for him to realize it, he’s taking inventory of all the surviving players. One by one, watching them fill the room and find their creaky beds or their little groups. Most were distraught, though some were particularly perturbed. It takes a couple teams before he understands that what he’s really looking for, naturally, is you. He’s always searching for you, even when he knew you weren’t searching for him back. 

That’s the change, and it dawns on him like a rapture. He’d never had to care before- you were always this constant in his life, something that would always bounce right back if he tossed you aside. He didn’t give a damn if it upset you, he didn’t give a damn if it ate away at you like termites through wood. But now he does, and he gives so many damn’s they’re driving him crazy. 

Any moment spent sober and lucid were moments entirely taken up by you.

Any moment now you’ll come strutting through those doors, head held high and gunning it to make sure Nam-gyu knew exactly how much you didn’t need him. 

But then ten teams turn into twenty, and twenty five into thirty. 

“How many teams were there?” Nam-gyu asks with a voice steadier than even he expected. Thanos doesn’t need to question anything, watching the doorway all the same. 

“Fifty-six.” Se-mi hums from her spot, leaning back against the steps. 

Thirty eventually turns to fifty. 

Too much time has passed, and you’ve still yet to pop out through that doorway. He double checks those who’d already shown their faces, hoping to find you through the cracks of them, but you’re simply not there. There’s a shovel digging pits and moats into his stomach. Another wave of players trickles in and he scans them all over the same, only to feel that hollowness inside him grow once more. They saunter to their beds, to their little groups, taking up space and taking up air that should belong to you. 

Where the hell were you?

“Only two teams left,” Thanos hums. “Where’s that girl of yours?”

Nam-gyu can’t force himself to answer this time around. So, instead, he presses his nails between his teeth and nervously shifts his weight from left to right. Though he shrugs, the anxiety within him was palpable, all lines and tension that he tried to bury with nonchalance. But it wasn’t working, and felt like he was being ripped apart from the inside out.

Mind racing, thoughts circling him like birds over fresh kill. The final team walks through the doorway, slow as zombies, shifty eyed and hurriedly rushing to their beds. His eyes sit on the door, waiting, waiting. 

No one comes through. 

His shoulders fall limp. 

You didn’t make it. 

“That’s a shame.” Se-mi sighs, the sound swimming in Nam-gyu’s ears. 

Loss, real loss was a foreign feeling within his chest. He’d seen it described in the movies, in songs, this soul eating all consuming weight that blanketed over bodies and crushed, but nothing could have ever prepared for the blistering moment it wrenches itself within the confines of his heart, within the deep ache of his bones. It didn’t settle properly in his throat- his body trying to force the alien ripple of dread stitching itself right between his ribs. It hurts- his lungs can’t take in air. His breath wheezes past his lips in shallow pants, unable to tear his eyes away, like at any moment you’ll suddenly materialize right before him. 

He presses his lip into a tight line and digs his nails into his palms, anything to release a fraction of the agony festering within his body. 

Brain on fire, shaking hands and the image of you dead in a thousand different flashes, a sting to his waterlines that has him scrambling to shove his fingers against the thin skin. 

Don’t fucking cry. Don’t fucking cry.

“Bad luck. Sorry, boy.”

All the skin on his body has flushed red and sticky. He ducks his head down towards his lap, desperate to hide within himself, even more desperate to hide this part of himself from the watchful eyes of his group. He should have just made you join them. Should have thrown you over his shoulder and wrapped an immovable grasp around your arm and held you hostage until everyone had a team and then you’d have no one else to turn to. No one else, nothing else except for him. 

He can’t even hear his friend’s counterfeit empathy over the swell of his heartbeat in his ears. His body is too heavy to hold up, his arms dragging as lead, his head even heavier on his shoulders. Uncanny urges to tear at the skin of his face overcome him and he has to bury them into his hair in release, roughly running his digits through the black locks, trying to breathe and breathe and breathe. A lump the size of a boulder burrows into his throat.

Cracking his eyes open to peek down at his lip, squeezing them shut when his vision is wet and blurry. His lower lip trembles until it’s caught in his teeth, biting hard into the skin. 

Don't fucking cry.

Why did you have to be so stubborn? If you’d have just let him take care of you this one fucking time, you would be alive right now. You should be alive right now- pissed and glaring fury in his direction but breathing and taking up space and existing-

“Ah, they made it. Here I thought they were all goners.”

Se-mi’s casual tone barely reaches him, but it’s got him frantically flicking his gaze back up to the archway, his hands falling from his face, trying to see through the blotches in his sight. A handful of players take soft steps into the room, all shaken up, all bewildered.

There you are. His racing heart stops entirely.

You’re sauntering into the dormitory like a wounded animal, all hands wringing out in front of you and lines drawn into your frown. For the first time, in Nam-gyu’s eyes, you look small. Frightened. Every step you take has a weight to it he’s never witnessed you bear. And even from across the room, even with rigid tears trapped in the corners of his eyes, he can see the grip of fear on the flat of your throat. 

All those jumping thoughts settle into a tunnel vision, you at the epicenter of his quaking nerves simmering down into stillness. He forgets how his chest had twisted as if a knife had been planted between his collarbones, and he forgets how he had almost lost his lunch right there on the floor. All because you’re standing there in the middle of the room hugging yourself, white as a ghost, even paler when you lift your head up and see the way Nam-gyu is trapped in your line of sight. 

Nam-gyu see’s it. No hate, no dejection. 

Relief- this instant where your widened eyes soften, your frown lifts into a slack-jawed breath of solace. It rocks his world when it hits him and it lights a flame so hot under his skin it’s burning through his veins. All the air trapped in his lungs leaves him at once and he can pinpoint the exact moment all the tensions in his shoulders and back melt away in nothingness. The tears dry, his lower lip released from his gnashing teeth.

The man you’d joined earlier pats your shoulder and offers you a pathetic, wavering thumbs up. You can’t seem to return his dull enthusiasm. In fact, you look worse than Nam-gyu’s seen you thus far. Changed, all wires sticking exposed and sparking. There’s this lifelessness to your body when you climb up the stairs and have to heave yourself up into your bed, crossing your legs and resting your chin on your palms propped up over your knees. 

When your eyes meet his, he expects some sort of sign of contempt, or perhaps maybe you’d refuse to meet his gaze entirely. Instead, for the first time since you’d arrived, you find him first. 

You offer him a pitiful open palmed wave. 

The pearly gates crack open and Nam-gyu feels it again- warmth. Even just a little bit, like lighting a match in a snowstorm, huddling around the flame. He half cocks a smile, and he waves back. 

--

Lunch came quicker than he’d anticipated, and much to Nam-gyu’s dismay, you weren’t exactly thrilled to hop into line. In fact, ever since you’d let him jam his fingers back into your closing door, you’d hardly acknowledged anything other than your lap. Even more so upsetting, that player you hung around tapped your mattress to gather your attention, pointing to the line, sighing in defeat when you’d shook your head. 

Jealousy seeps into his wounds all over again, quiet, but equally as simmering. Don’t act like you know her. Little devils tapping away at his psyche. She doesn't need you to check up on her.

But then again, he realizes, maybe you do. 

His mouth dries when the sound of his thoughts footsteps come running up on him. His greed. His innate ability to leave you unchecked and grappling. That was among the sea of problems Nam-gyu had been struggling to grasp. Here he was, trying to drag you back into the tar pits of his hold and he hadn’t even tried the basics of kindness. The step one of it all. Always taking, taking, taking and demanding more at every swipe. Always expecting, never building. 

So he jumps into line before he can second guess himself, and he takes his bento box with a grateful nod and he doesn’t waste a second before he’s chasing the trail of you to your bed. From your high point, perched and unmoving, all he can do is climb the stairs and rest his hands over the corner of your mattress. Your far away gaze lifts from your lap and settles down to him. 

The air is different. The landscape of you has changed. 

“What is it.” Your tone is uncannily flat, but it’s void of its bite, its drive. 

“Can I come up?” 

It’s a simple request, but it leaves a shake at the end of his sentence. It’s only natural when he mentally prepares himself for you to slap no onto his forehead, but you scoot over, and he takes the spot so quickly you wouldn’t even have the chance to say no if you thought about it too much. He hoists himself up and over, fills the gap at your side, just as he should have done days ago. He sits the bento box at the crest of your lap.

“What’s this?” Blinking down at the food, you make no effort to pick it up. 

“Fish and rice.” Nam-gyu shrugs. “Looks like an egg, too.” 

“I can see that. I meant, what are you doing giving me this?”

“...You didn’t get anything.”

As your fingers gingerly touch the container, eyes scanning over the contents, Nam-gyu feels he can breathe easier. This is a win for him- you aren’t fighting him anymore. Still on the edge, always ready to run, but the look in your eyes isn’t pure hatred or outright hurt. A swell of pride overcomes him when you pluck the chopstick and murmur, thank you. 

You’re pliable. Now, more than ever. 

You eat in silence. He lets you eat in silence, even though peace isn’t exactly one of his virtues.  Partly because he doesn’t know what to say to you, but mostly because he’s got this innate fear that he’s going to say something shitty and you’re going to hate him all over again for it. A million words are always shoving and pushing against his lips and he fumbles with navigating them. So, silence, it is. 

But it doesn’t bother him. Silence meant that you were simply just there, existing, the one thing he had longed for over the years. He knew, deep in his heart, he’d fucked up when he began to miss the very presence of you. No sex, no drugs, no push or pull, just you. And now he gets to take whatever you’ll give in micro doses, greedy and starved for you. Fighting the urge to pull you into himself where you could never climb out. He refrains- he forces himself to just be there. 

No longer could he be the creature he had been all those years ago. He had to be different- not all rough edges and clawing hands, ripping and taking. Or dark eyes watching your every move, or jagged words cutting your flesh with the highs and lows of his tone. Something better, this time. Something for you. 

Tomorrow would be a new beast entirely. And, in less than a few hours, the lights would flicker off and bask the dormitory into hues of red and blues. You would lay alone in your all-too-large bed and he would sink into his mattress drugged out of his mind thinking countless thoughts of you, you, you. The distance would feel like miles- he needed you right there, right then, always. Anything other than what he had sitting beside you was a vast ocean. 

The bento box appears in front of his lap, half eaten.

“You’re not going to eat it?” Nam-gyu’s brows knit.

“You should eat, too. What, scared of my germs now?” You murmur, and when he meets your eyeline, he sees something familiar in those hues. Something nurturing, sweet. Tender. 

Nam-gyu picks up the chopsticks, and he eats.  For the first time in years, his food tastes like food.

[hxrsheykisses]

Hi again Hershey!!! I absolutely LOVED how you wrote my last request abt the hopeless romantic! reader!!! Sorry if this is abrupt, but I wanted to know if you could write about the ETC boys accidentally coming across a love letter addressed to them from the reader?

Like—they would see a letter on the reader’s desk at school, get curious and open it, only to discover that it’s the reader confessing their feelings!!!

It sounded cute in my head ^///^

Anyways!! Take your time writing this and I hope you’re having a good day!!! ^3^

I’m so glad you liked it!! That request was honestly really fun to do and I enjoyed it’ It was honestly so sweet♥️♥️♥️ Rhank you again for requesting!!

It’s been a good couple of weeks after the boys countless attempts at wooing you over and trying to get you to realize what you’re needing is RIGHT here in front of you. But they were losing so much hope because their efforts arent working! It wasn’t you be ungrateful, they know that (hopefully). It’s just that it’s such a shame that you struggle to see it.

One day, at school, the boys always had a routine of walking you to class together. You shared some classes with them and others not so that was the routine. They also waited outside of your class after dismissal.

However, your class was already empty and you weren’t in there—just your stuff at your desk. They were confused as to why you weren’t there anymore since you never leave your class without them. They gave each other some confused looks before making their way to your seat where all of your stuff was laid out. But their eyes caught on a discarded letter and a pencil beside it—which sparked them to be snoopy…

As they took the note from the envelope, they felt their world come to a COMPLETE stop.

BILL’S ROUTE

Bill never felt so high off of cloud 9 before when he snatched the note, reading every word that was neatly written on the piece of paper, his heart skipping with each word.

He would lowkey brag on his friends about it, saying how you are so into him. He claimed proudly that his efforts made through while there’s didn’t. He had finally got you where he wanted you and that’s all that truly matters right now.

He would tease you as well, waving your love letter in the air—saying how he humbly accepts your confession before dragging you away and leaving his friends behind in their sorrows.

JERRY’S ROUTE

Jerry was in utter shock, staring with his jaw dropped as he got finished reading the letter. He ignored his friends groans and complaints as he reread the note over and over and over again. Oh, he just couldn’t believe that you had chosen him.

He would tried to comfort his friends, saying how it wasn’t serious and how it’ll be okay. But they weren’t exactly having it, leaving Jerry feeling a little bit guilty but he still was happy that you had chosen him. Deep down, he believed that his friends wouldn’t treat you like how he would.

Jerry would force his friends to keep the fact that they snooped through your belongings a secret, begging them. He didn’t want you to change your mind about him so he told you the truth on his own terms, he was really anxious about the confession and he apologized. But he’s happy that he won you over!

PETE’s ROUTE

As soon as he saw that the letter was directed towards him, he just went all the way to 100 REAL quick. This boy was literally doing cartwheels around the classroom because he knew that he had won your heart. He is also very braggy to his friends, shoving the middle finger in their face, and other crap. Like he’s so freaking stupid at that moment.

Pete wouldn’t hide the fact that they did in fact were nosy with your items, that wasn’t on his mind when he saw you walking into the classroom. He was just so enthusiastic about being your beloved boyfriend because who wouldn’t? He’ll be a pretty decent boyfriend to you anyway—I mean he proved it to you while he was trying to win you over!

A day never goes by without Pete telling his friends ALLLL about you. He knows that they are pissed and jealous and shit but he doesn’t care. All he knows is that he has fine shyt by his side so nothing else matters💔

JOSH’S ROUTE

Josh shoving EVERYONE out of the way once he saw his name written. He would wave the letter in the air while loudly announcing how his friends are pathetic ass losers who can’t pull any girls and how he basically won the lottery. He’s laughing in their faces while Bill lowkey starts cussing him out (which he pays no mind too)

I swear bro Bill will try to fuck Josh over by loudly shouting at you about how Josh was snooping through your shit to somehow make you reconsider. You don’t. You scolded Josh for a bit, and the others before letting Josh give you a giant bear hug! After, he walked you home—leaving the boys in the dust.

He loves poking a shit ton of fun at Bill because he’s last resort was so desperate that it’s laughable. He made a fool out of himself! This will most likely have Josh kicked out of the club for a day but during that “off” day, he just spent his day with you because who cares about what that dipshit thinks or does?

[arkhamsbrat]

Okayokayokay imagine gk! jason taking care of you when you’re sick! he’s such a sweetie pie I wouldn’t know what to do with myself…

SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SHUTUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

gk! jason coming to your place with your favorite soup from that takeout place on the corner of your street… just cause you texted him to let him know ur ill… it was actually you telling him to stay at his own apartment for once because you didn’t want to get him sick. that man doesn’t listen.

he also doesn’t like being away from you but that’s besides the point. yes, hed face 1000 illnesses for you… worry about that when you arent sick.

jason’s standing at your door, takeout bag in hand. he cracks a crooked smile when you open the door wrapped in an old quilt, tissue in hand. “told y’i was sick, dummy.” youre glaring at him. its easy for him to read past it, jason knows its because you care about his health more than he does.

“yeah. and im being your boyfriend. gonna let me in, or…” he dangles the bag in front of you. “should i take this to my apartment?” the soup sloshes against the plastic container, almost begging you to down it all in one go. “bastard. c’mon. your fault if you catch a cold.” the wooden floorboards of your apartment creak as he pushes the door open further, grin widening.

jason: 1, you: 0.

“it’d be worth it if i did.” he eyes the makeshift nest youve created in your bed. your apartment is freezing, no wonder you need all those blankets. rifling through the cabinets doesn’t comfort him any further. half the medicine is expired and the other half won’t do anything. “you are…” he trails off, seeing you still glaring at him. “yes?”

“if you are about to judge my medicine cabinet, i will kill you.” he nods once, holding back a laugh as he raises his hands in defeat. “alright, alright.”

it’s a little dance you two do. jason couldn’t care less if he lived or died, but you? he needed you to take care of yourself. you felt the reverse. both of you in a never-ending battle of who would “win”. both of you far, far, FAR too stubborn to admit that you liked when you got babied by the other.

“can i at least go getchya somethin’ that’ll actually make you feel better?” you grunt in response, practically nose deep in the soup he brought you. it was, in fact, helping. “whens the last time you ate, huh?” your eyes peer over the container and you send him a nervous smile. “haven’t felt okay enough to eat?”

jason walks over to the table and kisses your forehead. “call me next time, my stubborn, stubborn girl. i’m stayin’ til you’re better.”

[whoopsyeahokay]

Boyfriend Wally Clark (NSFW)

Wally Clark x fem!reader

___________________________💦

Wally is exactly the type of romantic who sweeps you off your feet. He's goofy, charming, affectionate. Always finding ways to touch you when you and he are with your friends. Holds you close and keeps you in his arms, on his lap, against his body on the couch that you and he usurp for yourselves at Movie Night. He's all about forehead kisses and laced fingers and cradling your cheek as he tells you how much he loves you. Brushes your hair out of your eyes and smiles at you like you're the only person in the world he can see.

Wally is exactly the type who soaks up compliments like a sponge, has both an ego and an insecurity that needs attention. He revels in your praise and devotion. He's attentive and loyal, there when you need him at the drop of a hat. Pulling up in his Mustang, ready to dote on his passenger princess, hand on your thigh as he drives one-handed, fingers digging into your flesh while he watches the road. He's into sweet gestures and reassurances. Respect. Thoughtful gifts just because and more thoughtful actions when you're not feeling well.

But Wally is also the type to whisper dark promises in your ear when you and he are surrounded by people in the hall, pressing against your back as you rummage through your locker, his hand roaming under your shirt to smooth up your stomach, fingertips teasing the edge of your bra. He wields his self-control like a weapon off the field as much as on it, grinding his hard cock into your palm through his jeans, his hand tight around your wrist—"Do you like what you do to me, baby?"—after he drags you into an empty classroom because he spent lunch watching Jackass Jake Tremblay flirt with you for your vote. "You like how hard I get just for you?"

Wally is also the type to get possessive, hard bites on your neck, sucking a necklace of bruises into your collar that you can't hide under your shirt. He wants everyone to know you're his. He makes you remember with his fingers in your pussy, dragging them in and out as he nips your ear, "No one else gets to touch you like this. No one else can see you like this." And you whimper and beg, writhing beneath him, legs spread wide to accommodate him. He eats you out, lips and tongue and light grazes of teeth, staring at you through his lashes, memorizing every sound you make as he edges you for longer than you can handle, fucks you with his tongue, tastes you like a feast made just for him.

Wally is exactly the type to fuck you until you scream. He starts slow when you're already on the brink, cock thick and heavy, teasing himself against you as he kisses your breasts, sucks your nipples, one hand on your throat—a reminder, a promise—while he strokes himself with the other, flushed tip against your entrance. "You need me right here, don't you baby?" And then he rocks into you in one deep, grinding motion, stuffing you so full you might burst. "I'm gonna fuck you 'til you scream my name, baby girl." It's rough, hard, he grips your thigh tight enough to bruise as he bites your bottom lip, licks into your mouth, makes you squeeze around him. "So tight, baby, so good for me. You want me to make you come? You think you earned it?"

Wally is definitely the type who fucks like an animal after he sees another guy talk to you, but he's also the type who gets off on making you wait for that sweet release when it suits him. But even he has his limits, begins to pant and groan, hips moving faster, hands around your wrists where they're pinned above your head, his other hand between his body and yours, spit-wet thumb rubbing your clit as he watches your face, wants to see the moment you fall apart for him and when you do, "Good girl, baby, fuck, that's it, let me feel it, baby, make me come" and you convulse around him, your pussy gripping him so tight as you come that it milks his climax from him. He moans, lips crashing against yours.

Wally is exactly the type to cuddle after sex. Gentle touches and soft kisses and loving words, fingertips grazing your cheek as he stares into your eyes in the afterglow. "I love you, baby," in a low, husky voice, forehead pressed to yours, his hand gliding down your body to your side, waist, hip, ass. He pulls you tight against him, already half-hard again, because, Jesus Christ, he's insatiable when it comes to you.

💦___________________________

[papercranesandinkstains]

Without a Trace (A Veronica Mars Inspired OBX SMAU): Masterlist

Summary: You had it all. A seemingly perfect life, a great group of friends, and amazing boyfriend... Until your best friend is found murdered in her backyard. All it takes is the death of Sarah Cameron for your world to come crumbling down. Friendships are breaking up left and right, you and your now ex-boyfriend can't be near each other, and your best friend's boyfriend is so convinced you know what happened that he has made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell. After siding with Kie when her dad accused Ward Cameron of killing his own daughter, you find yourself the biggest social pariah at Kildare High. So, you and your friends make a website exposing the Kook's for everything they are, which increases your stock value with your peers. Until your ex-friend John B comes to you begging you to help prove his dad is innocent. Of what crime, might you ask? Oh, the death of Sarah Cameron.

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader/ JJ Maybank x Reader (undecided)

Prologue

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight

Part Nine

Part Ten

Taglist is currently open!

[thevoicefromanotherworld]

"YES?"

We all know Dave is obsessed with boobs. I mean, we all saw THAT scene in the movie, so I wrote a fic about it

Hope you like it!

Dave was trying to concentrate on reading the comic he had in his hands, but the fact that you kept teasing him to pay attention to you wasn't helping at all.

More than once he had looked up from the colorful pages to see the tempting shape of your nipples showing beneath the tight black t-shirt you were wearing. It was no secret that Dave loved boobs, but specifically his girlfriend's, meaning yours.

You knew perfectly well the effect you were having on him. When you woke up that morning, you decided that you wouldn't put on your bra.

After all, Dave had already seen you naked a few times, so you left it stored in the drawer of your nightstand.

You turned your head towards him when you felt him looking at you. He quickly turned his head back to his comic.

“Dave, are you okay?” you asked, he nodded without taking his eyes off the comic.

“Perfectly,” he answered in a squeaky voice, making you smile.

You stopped what you were doing and sat on his lap slowly. He pushed the comic away in the same way to look at you, while a blush spread across his cheeks.

You smiled because despite everything you had shared together, the fact that he still retained that shyness was something that turned you on more than you were willing to admit.

“What are you doing?” he asked in a shaky voice.

“I'm taking care of my boyfriend,” you smiled, leaving a soft kiss on his lips, before looking into his eyes, his glasses fogging up for a moment. “That's what good girlfriends do, right?”

-I guess so - he murmured, sketching a nervous smile - you know you're my first girlfriend, so I don't have much experience in that

-I know - you smiled -

You saw how his gaze went down to your chest again. You made a gesture with your index finger towards your face.

-My eyes are up here, Dave - you reminded him, he tilted his head before looking at you attentively -

-Yeah… sure… I'm sorry… it's just that… I… - he stammered, you shook your head from side to side -

-You don't have to apologize - you whispered - I know exactly what you need

-Yes?

-Yes - you said reaching the hem of your shirt between your fingers -

You put the garment aside, and your breasts were in front of him. He looked at them for a moment, before looking up at you.

-Shit - he cursed making you smile, he brought his hands closer to them - Can I…? –he asked, you nodded-

-Yes –you said- please touch me –you almost begged-

His deep blue eyes connected with yours, before he caught your breasts in his hands. You gasped at the touch of his cold skin against your warm one.

They felt heavy in his palms as he ran his thumb over your nipples, making goosebumps rise all over your skin. His gaze focused on your face, taking in all the sensations that ran through it.

-Don't stop… -you gasped- please…

Dave leaned forward to capture your lips in a soft kiss, before moving his lips down your neck, until he caught one of your nipples between his teeth, while massaging the other with his hand.

You brought your hands to his curly locks, tugging at it with each little bite and swipe of his tongue.

-God… -you gasped- if I knew you were so good at this, I would have stopped wearing a bra a long time ago

-You don't need them -he said making you smile- for me you can burn them all

A couple of passes with his tongue made you cum like a teenager.

You didn't care in the least, not when you saw the smug smile your boyfriend had on his lips, and the way his blue eyes shone with a special glow.

[concretejunglefm]

I think all 4 boys have a submissive side to them, some more than others however how do you think they would like ‘come into’ their submissive side? Like what makes the realize they might be into being submissive with you? What ignited that flame and how did they let you know?

I love how you think anon and i love this question and even more than that i love love love my subby boys.

For Noah it's all about trust. If he doesn't have that connection and trust with you, then he's not going to be vulnerable in that regard, however when it's there you'll know because even before there's anything sexual about it, he's already giving you the puppy eyes, so willing to do anything and everything you ask. You toss him even an ounce of praise he is preening over it. The words 'good boy' are an easy set off, but he also loves being called your sweet boy, that makes him melt and especially in relation to instruction or praise. How he lets you know is definitely not by asking, not at first, the sweet boy is far too shy for that. Instead he's dropping hints, calling you miss or goddess, or when you do start to move things along, he's taking your hands to hold his wrists or moving them to his throat just to make you squeeze it, even a little. He wants to feel you have power over him but he's too shy to ask. Eventually you coax it out of him with soft praises and assurance until he's down on his knees and begging to be your good little puppy.

Letting the word pup or puppy slip out around him is an instant head turner, I'm surprised his tongue isn't already out his mouth from the panting and drooling being called that can triggers.

When it comes to Ruffilo, while he's used to being the one in charge, worshiping you and being completely soft as he takes charge of your pleasure, he finds himself enjoying when you toss him a lighthearted mean remark every now and then. Your sweet and attentive boyfriend, who will do anything for you loves it when you degrade and humiliate him. Honestly it surprised him more than it did you. From a light hearted mean comment to calling him 'useless' and even 'pathetic', he was already down on his knees and ready to beg for a crumb of attention from you. His favorite thing becomes when you don't even let him fuck you, but you make him fuck between your thighs because he hasn't earnt the privilege, yet.

He also loves complete sensory deprivation and being turned into nothing more than an object for your pleasure.

Is there any surprise that Folio would want nothing more than to be your good boy? He's always been overly eager, always willing to please. You say jump and he's already halfway over you, spreading your legs and holding them back while he dives between your thighs, except you need to teach your eager puppy patience and that's the hardest part. He never realized how much restraint he had in him until you literally had to restrain him. It's a slow process to release him from them, because he hates it, but you love to watch as he struggles with being unable to reach and touch you, the muscle memory of doing so too prominent. When he finally learns he's the most obedient pup boy you could ever ask for.

Sometimes he loves to purposely misbehave and ignore any of your requests purely to be punished. His favorite punishment is being over your lap, his cock milked and his ass filled with whatever little toy you choose to treat him to today. Instead of teaching him to be patient, you're teaching him the benefit of it by completely overstimulating him to the point there are literal tears in his eyes he's so overwhelmed with pleasure.

Jolly is a force to be reckoned with, but that man on his knees for you is a sight to take your breath away. It starts with him wanting to worship you, and while usually he holds the power, a complete control and dominance, you can feel the power exchange when he's down on his knees and looking up at you with soft eyes, wanting nothing more than to feel you take charge. Your fingers wrapped around his hair, you pull him to you and he likes it when you get rough, when you tap into your own little sadistic side and give him a taste of his own medicine.

Sometimes it becomes two doms fighting for power, but he's always quick to relent because he never wants to steal it from you, he just wants to make you work for it and he loves when you finally get that light in your eyes as you deliver a slap, grab his face or pull his hair.

Including Matty in this for my own enjoyment because the way you discover this man has a submissive side is when he is beyond stressed. Usually he takes out his frustration on you, pulling you into some nearby room before having his way with you, being rough and unapologetic. You love him like that, when he just grabs and takes what he needs, finding his release and clarity in you. Except one time it does little to actually take his head out of things, so you try something different. You take charge, tying him up and blindfolding him while teasingly stroking him. Naturally he starts to get a little bratty, a little too mouthy and impatient. You solve that with your hand over his mouth as you work your hand on him until he's seeing stars, even surpassing that because you're not stopping, not until you've gotten another out of him and he's completely forgotten about whatever he was in his head over.

The addition of toys to this really become his favorite, especially if you choose to keep him tied up while you play with and overstimulate him.

Which one of them is most likely to have a voice kink you can use and exploit? Especially when they're on tour and you're apart.

[cute-firelight]

I liked Caitvi in Season 2.

That said, that doesn’t mean I think their development is perfect.

For me what failed and felt kinda underwhelming was how the reuniting was done. It felt like as nothing had happened and they were like: oh! Well, You are here. And also Cait hiting Vi there again was not ok after what had happened. Like, that reuniting would have worked if the separation between them was less dramatic.

But for me, the rest of the development was handled very well and compensated that (the wording here is critical: FOR ME, if for other people is not enough is fine).

I liked the rawness of the impulsivity of what Caitlyn did, because honestly Cait was sooo bad but in general all their interactions after the bombing were really one sided from Caitlyn’s part, things were wrong since the start. The hit was just the culmination of all of it.

She convinced Vi to join the enforcers even with how hard was for her, then Vi begs her not to change, clinging to how Cait used to be when they met; but she now was in a complete another headspace.

You know, in the past I had a pretty bad moment psychologically, where my personality changed a lot. I felt like a genuine monster, I am not kidding. I never hit anyone but my behaviour still was totally not ok with my bf. I went to therapy, my boyfriend supported me and understood me, for my surprise, and now we have a very healthy relationship where I am a very supportive partner and we are both very happy with each other. It was all originated form insecurities and trauma, and because of that experience I can understand that ironically Cait felt powerless at that moment.

My interpretation of it is: she felt that the suit was big for her, but she had to wear it anyway to solve her mistake. In this mindstate she forces Vi to be an enforcer because she thinks is the same she is doing: wearing a suit she doesn’t want, and even if she doesn’t feel like it, because the situation requires to. Her dad did a hideous job at making her feel more guilty and more obligated to answer to it. Ofc I know you will say: but Vi’s trauma with enforcers is different than Cait’s with her mother and yes that is true. But is part of Cait blindness to the situation because of her mental state.

Then, Vi becomes an enforcer because she feels pressured to (this also probably needed a little bit of more showing and justification but I don’t see it unlikely).

They are hunting people with gas and all what it takes to solve everything is Cait to capture Jynx, this is a lot of pressure, she is dealing with the duel and everything at the same time. That moment of weakness and aggression from Cait was framed in a very specific situation when all the things that were pressuring her collapsed in one instant. Yes, her hitting embodied that privilege, and brutality but wasn’t that what they were already doing? I feel that is kinda the point? Cait there was perpetuating the system in where she was in by trying to hunt Jynx and by making all this gassing and stuff, and she felt forced to do it because of duty and guilt, and also that made her feel powered against her pain. Idk I liked that they dared to be so raw and harsh. (Basically, what I want to say here is that what you said about not being just a normal betrayal but a symbolism of their privilege difference and oppression I think that this was intentionally intended, I don’t understand the American lens comment bc I am not from the US)

What I would change of that scene maybe is the way the hit was done, because honestly the first time I watched I thought that she had broken a rib and let Vi injured. Sooo, maybe, not having Cait hit Vi at all and just to push her away and run. Then Vi would try to run after Cait again and in that moment Cait would threaten to hit Vi with the gun, then Vi would froze because that would remind her of her trauma and Cait would tell her about not wanting to see her again or hate her or something and to take the chance and run away (this scene could work both if the hit happens or not).

I wouldn’t rate her dark ark/redemption as perfect. Those are very very difficult to do but is not the worse I have seen. Again, if for you was enough or not is something more personal in my opinion.

Lastly, the ending of their arc makes a lot of sense. Cait said: fuck it. If she releases Jynx I don’t care, is not only Jynx’s fault but also my fault because I also couldn’t handle the situation between us properly. If there are more consequences I will face them.

Ambessa was a bigger threat than Jynx and I made her grow and she made the conflict worse. So basically: we both are the same. Cait trusted Vi’s judgement, something she didn’t do at the beginning by being super patronizing and saying how wrong she was, what was right to choose for her to do etc.. here she acknowledges Vi’s agency and lets her choose, with that Vi sees that the Caitlyn she fell for was still there. Caitlyn in general was very humbled down by the entire situation and she got to really grasp the power behind her privilege and how she affected things for the worse being even worse than Jynx in terms of consequences.

I want to say here, that I think that a lot of people wouldn’t have forgiven Cait, and that is valid. But Vi’s personality is like that. I think she is a person that is forgiving by nature, and she also has done terribly bad mistakes and this is why she forgives her. I know this would be less polemic if they were equals and that the show’s handling of inequality could have been way better. But I still liked it. I think their relationship will always have this inequality element ingrained with it; but the value of it is that they are able to see who each of them are beyond that. Also, I don’t see their relationship perfect after everything ended. I think that they still are going to need a lot of work to build a relationship.

Is sad that they didn’t let the writers of S1 be here as well, because I think that it would have helped to have more opinions of ways that some of the scenes could have been interpreted and dissected, besides the way they intended and I think that very small modifications to all of it would have improved it a lot. Because honestly the base of all of it is pretty solid and I feel that most people grudges about it are for details that feel too much or are out of place.

I feel that fans that defend Cait’s actions are also not ok, because the point of Cait’s arc is that is a dark arc. Characters that make mistakes are the ones that make a good dramatic story about how everyone’s context determine the way they act and how no matter how they try they can’t undo it. This traces back to Season 1 themes as well and is clear it was intended since the start. The execution and delivery are the reasons why it doesn’t work for everyone in my opinion.

for my own sanity, i try to stay away from caitvi discourse, but it’s truly baffling that some people still actively defend caitlyn hitting vi and are "dumbfounded" that it is enough for people to stop shipping them and voice their discontent about their relationship in s2.

one of the most common and dumb defenses i’ve seen is that caitlyn only hit vi once, as if the frequency of the act changes its nature. even a single instance of violence is still violence. highlighting that it happened only once does not negate its significance. it still happened, and it still matters. really, it's simple ...

but the dumbest attempt to defend this moment is comparing caitvi to other ships in arcane, when no other relationship in the series has a similar dynamic. in other pairings that involve physical conflict, both characters fight back or retaliate in some way, whether it’s jinx and ekko, viktor and jayce, or even vander and silco. but caitlyn hitting vi is entirely one-sided. vi does not hit back, and it is not framed as a fight. this moment is not a confrontation between equals but an instance of caitlyn exerting power over vi, someone who has already been through a lot of trauma (years of imprisonment and being beaten by enforcers), which caitlyn is very aware of.

but that’s if you watch arcane as a whole and not just for the relationship, because caitlyn hitting vi is a moment charged with systemic inequality. caitlyn represents the very institution that destroyed vi’s life. when she strikes her, it's not just an individual betrayal, it echoes the violence of an entire system that has oppressed zaunites for generations. it’s impossible to disregard that the historical and social power imbalance makes the scene feel so disturbing if you actually watch the show with your eyes open.

and it’s a major red flag. for caitlyn to hit vi, knowing what she has been through, is not just an act of violence but one that disregards the weight of vi’s suffering. she fails to see vi fully, not just as somebody willing to help her, a potential partner, or a fighter, but as someone wounded by her past.

also, i take back what i said about the dumbest attempt to defend this scene being comparing caitvi to other ships. the dumbest one is when people minimize caitlyn's action by defending the enforcers in general ... because no, the idea that the backlash against caitlyn hitting vi in arcane is simply a matter of an “american lens” is dumb asf. a lot of what's in the show mirrors the kind of systemic violence seen in many parts of the world, not just in the usa. y'all are not exceptional. class struggles, institutionalized oppression, and the abuse of power by those who hold privilege aren't exclusive to america. please wake up. these are themes that transcend national and cultural boundaries. vi’s trauma from imprisonment is not an american experience alone. the psychological and physical toll of being incarcerated is universal. how dumb do you have to be to actually think otherwise?

anyway, even if i don’t like that arcane didn’t frame caitlyn’s action as a serious issue and that it is treated as just another moment in their relationship, the willingness to ignore or rationalize it says more about the fandom’s biases than the actual content of the show imo ...

[potatomountain]

FFF- Day 8

FFF Masterlist

Prompt: Experimental/nipple play

Member: Hongjoong

Word Count: 924

Warnings: 18+, implied smut, no specified gender, use of the color system, switch Hongjoong though he is more subby here.

> Minors/blank blogs will be blocked!<

Banners and dividers made by me!

“Come on Joongie, you promised.” With a whine you held up the spiked chains connecting to two nipple clamps. “This is what I want to try- I did that thing for you last time. Please?”

Your boyfriend and you had an agreement that anytime one of you wanted to try something new, you two would try anything once. If it worked out, it was a new thing to toy with in the bedroom- if not, the two of you talked it over whether or not to try it again or not. Sometimes you did and it worked out, sometimes not.

Last time you tried something out of your comfort zone that he had wanted, you enjoyed it, and you just knew he would like this.

Still he eyed the nipple clamps warily. “Why clamps? Why do I have to wear them? Where did you even get the idea?”

Slowly you grinned, ready to make your case. “Your concert. Baby it was so obvious how perky your nipples were through the shirt I just wanted to play with them. And I know the guitar strap rubs them, makes them so sensitive. You don't dislike that either.” It was all you could think about after yesterday's concert. The way he looked playing the guitar, the strap rubbing against the pebbled peaks the white fabric couldn't contain at all. Thinking about it now had your mouth salivating.

He sighed, a sign he was relenting. “Fine, but if I don't like them I'm using them on you.”

“I'm okay with that.” With a giggle you took the clamps to the bedroom, climbing onto the bed first and patting the center. “Strip big boy and come sit.”

Grumbling, still a little hesitant, Hongjoong did. Clothes tossed aside he climbed onto the bed and sat on his knees in front of you. Despite his grumbling, his half hard cock and red ears was enough to tell you that part of him did like this idea.

You couldn't hide your excitement, reaching out and running your thumbs over his little peaks and observing his reaction. He reacted just as you expected, the softest change in his demeanor. “I knew it- they are sensitive.”

“Just use the clamps-”

“Nuh-uh, I have to work you up to it first, baby. Get them nice and hard so I won't have any trouble putting the clamps on.” He loved playing with yours, now you could return the favor. And you did.

Pinching both of them you gave a slight pull, happy to see his cock twitch and his pupils dilate. His hands were on his thighs, gripping them to keep from touching you. He would have plenty of opportunities to do that soon, but first you got to have your fun. It only took a few more gentle pinches and twists before it was more than obvious he was enjoying it, cock at full mass and a bead of precum just sitting there begging to be tasted.

Instead you latched your lips around his nipple, looking up at him through your lashes to see how he reacted. The whine he let out went straight to your head. Pressing your tongue against the bud you flicked and sucked, letting out a moan when his hand pressed your head closer.

With a giggle you pulled away, smiling up at him as you moved your tongue to the other neglected nipple. “Color baby? How do you like it? Does it feel good?”

“G-green. Really good. This how it feels for you?” He panted out, gaze a little hazy when he met your eyes.

“Mhmm. Feels s'good when you play with me.” You mumbled against his skin before tugging on the peak with your teeth. “You're going to look so good in those clamps when I put them on you.” 

The whimper he let out just had you further convinced this was going well. Maybe he'd let you play with them more often? You couldn't be certain until the clamps were on.

While you sucked and flicked the now hardened bud, you reached for the clamps. Moving your mouth back to the first peak, you brought one clamps up, watching him through your lashes as you latched it onto his title.

The cry he let out, body jolting beneath you, and the way his dick twitched and leaked- all of it had arousal pooling through you.

He was still reeling from the first clip when you latched on the second, taking advantage of his surprise and pushing him back down on the bed. He was trembling, cheeks flushed and a heated glaze to his beautiful dark eyes. “Look at you baby, I knew you would like it. And the spikes suit you so well.”

His hands gripped your thighs tightly, eyes meeting yours as you tugged on the chain. “Fuck it hurts but-”

“You like it don't you? Admit it baby, I was right.” You cooed out, a smirk on your lips.

He bit down on his own, being defiant in the end. Until you tugged on the chain again, light enough his back arched and he let out another whimper of a cry.

His grip on your thighs was bruising, but it just added to the beautiful picture he was. “I like it. Fuck I like it.”

Showing some mercy you leaned down and kissed his swollen lips, wondering just how you were going to take advantage of him like this. One thought won over: would the chain jingle with each thrust?

You were determined to find out.

[probablysimpledreams]

Surprise Valentine (Dabi x reader)

a/n: a little early v-day treat for you cuties<33 I'm still working on a Keigo piece for valentines day so that should be out soon (hopefully) lol I was working on it then went out and when I got home the idea for this fic washed over me so crazily I was like I HAVE to write it ahhh enjoy lovelies <33

wc: 1096

"I don't need a babysitter!" Toga huffed as she skipped down the dimly lit street, refusing to face Dabi who was following close behind. 

"I find that hard to believe," Dabi rolled his eyes. "I'm here for my own reasons, so just shut up and keep walking. We're almost there anyway." Toga stopped in her tracks, a wicked grin spreading across her face as she took in his words. Dabi was joining her to steal Valentine's Day treats and items from the store on his own accord? It could only mean one thing.......

"I knew it! You are in love!" the young girl beamed, completely invading Dabi's personal space as she danced around happily. "Love love love!"

"Ohmygod will you shut up?!" Dabi snapped back, looking down at his feet as he kept walking. He didn't want to admit it but Toga was right, he was in love with you. So much so that he wanted to be the sweet boyfriend who surprises you with cute gifts, despite his claim to dislike this and any other holiday. God love was embarrassing. 

"You didn't deny it," Toga teased, dodging the small flame he threw her way. Dabi just groaned in response, silently begging she'd leave him alone so he could grab what he needed and get out. 

After a few more steps and teasing remarks by Toga, the pair finally made it to the closed shop. Dabi swiftly cuts out any security cameras and locks, allowing the two to enter the shop. The isles were filled with a massive assortment of heart shaped candies, plushies, flowers, and other everyday items in pink or red to make buyers want to grab it. 

Though he wouldn't admit it aloud, Dabi was overwhelmed as he browsed the store. Everything felt so flashy, so forward, so lovey dovey. But none of it felt like him. If he was going to do something for you, he was going to make sure you could see the thought and love behind it. He may not be the most romantic man or the best with words, but he always made sure his actions told you exactly how he felt. Exactly how much he loved you. It had to be perfect. He needed to be the best boyfriend. He needed your love. He needed you to never leave him. He needed- 

"You're overthinking this dummy," Toga's voice snaps Dabi back to reality as she approaches him, hands full of heart shaped chocolates and little plushies. "I know you know what ______ likes, so just pick something and stick with the decision." 

Though it annoyed him, Toga's reassurance eased his thoughts. He took a deep breath, rubbing his eyes before looking at the isles again with a new, refreshed mindset. This time a black cat plushie with a gold heart collar caught his eye. He chuckled as he remembered the countless times you'd say he reminded you of a cat or he had "black cat energy," whatever the hell that meant. As he went to grab it, his eyes began trailing upward and landed on a plushie that happened to be your favorite animal and color. A small smile tugs at his lips as he examines the item, noting it slightly resembled you as well. He decided to grab both plushies, snatching a pack of your favorite snacks before heading out with Toga. 

Once back at the hideout, Toga immediately began showing off her "shopping" haul to the rest of the League. This allowed Dabi to go unnoticed as he snuck out, headed straight to your apartment. He wakes you up by knocking on your window, blue eyes shining as he stares through the glass. 

"I'm begging you to use the front door," you sigh as you open the window, allowing him to climb into your room. You were still trying to catch your breath after he scared you wide awake by arriving here at 2 am without any prior warning.

"Mmm no can do sweetheart, gotta keep you on your toes," he grinned. 

"Why are you even here?" you yawned, urging him to join you on the bed. "Not that I'm complaining or anything, just isn't like you to show up without some kind of heads up. Everything okay?" His heart swelled at your concern. The way you loved him so gently, so purely made his head spin. That feeling only intensified as he remembered why he even came over in the first place. 

"I-uh-I have something for you." His eyebrows furrowed as he mentally scolded himself for sounding so nervous. Your eyes widen with excitement at his words. 

"For me?" you smile, looking at him. You could tell he was nervous which only made you smile grow. God he's so cute.

"Just take it," he grumbles. While it came off coldly, you knew he was just nervous. Everything about his relationship with you was new to him, and that scared him. Because of this you were always patient, and knew his actions showed his true emotions. That's why your jaw almost dropped when he handed you the plushies and snacks. 

"Stopppp is this us as plushies?" you happily asked as you examined the plushies. You already knew the answer though, smiling ear to ear as you hugged the soft and fuzzy items. 

"Thought you'd be into some corny shit like that," he chuckles, nerves slowly dissolving seeing you so happy. He hid his still trembling hands from your line of vision as he pulled you into his side, kissing the top of your head. "Happy Valentine's Day baby." 

"AHHH I love you!! I love you!!!" you cheered, pulling him to lay down on the bed with you. You moved to lay on top of him, covering his face with kisses before nuzzling into his neck. His arms tightened around you as you cuddled against him, smile still painted on your face. "Thank you for my gift." 

He hummed, small smile tugging at his lips as he rubbed your back gently. "Glad you liked it." 

"I have something for you too but," you yawned, "I'll give you it before I head to work in a few hours." Your eyes start falling shut as the warmth from Dabi's body lures you back to sleep. "Mmmmm good night, I love you."

"I love you too baby." Dabi leans down to kiss your lips before adjusting the way you're laying on him so you both could fall asleep comfortably. His arms tighten around you once again, reminding you he's not going anywhere as you both drift off to sleep.

[rosy-hollow]

When your boyfriend is the main character of the story the vessel of Sukuna, it's really hard to get downtime.

But every time, without fail, Yuji always makes sure to spend time with you—more specifically, he loves to go hiking with you.

It started with small strolls around campus when the two of you first started dating, but eventually, as the two of you got older, you went on more hikes together—the trips you would take turning into weekend-long camping trips in the mountains.

It made your heart warm—seeing the big bright smile on Yuji's face as you guys trekked up various trails and talked about everything and nothing together. Being the vessel of Sukuna was taxing, especially on top of being a jujutsu sorcerer. But here, in the mountains with you... he felt so safe, so happy—like everything else just washed away.

This time was no different—Yuji had just gotten off a mission and had finally gotten approval to take the weekend off, and your pink-haired boyfriend practically tackled you with puppy eyes and a pouty lip, begging for a camping trip that weekend.

"Yuji, it looks like it might rain—"

"It's only a possibility! Plus, we can just bring umbrellas!"

"I don't think that's how it works..."

"Please please please please pleaaaaseee?? My gorgeous, beautiful love of my life who loves me equally as much because I would die for you and I want to spend time with youuuu?"

"..."

When that doesn’t work, Yuji gives up and starts peppering your face with kisses until you give in.

"Ack—okay, okay, we can go, Yuji! Hey, cut that out! It tickles! Yujiii!"

When you finally arrive at the mountain you usually go camping at, Yuji’s beyond ecstatic. He finally gets time off to spend with his baby—who wouldn't be happy about that?

After unloading your gear from the car and double-checking to make sure you didn't forget anything, the two of you start on your hike, enjoying the forest around you.

The trees were tall, looming over the both of you, still allowing sunlight to peek through their leaves. To some, it felt ominous, but to you, it felt sheltered—safe. The familiar crunch of stray twigs and leaves under your boots ground you a bit as the crisp mountain air fills your lungs.

You felt... at peace. Happy, with Yuji by your side.

It was about an hour and 15 minutes into your hike when you felt it.

A small raindrop hitting your nose.

Followed by another, and another, and another—until you both were caught in a ceaseless downpour, the two of you bolting along the path and finding a place to set up camp that wasn't too shabby for the time being—forced to pitch a tent in the pouring rain.

Once the two of you were safely inside and changed into warmer, dry clothes, you send a halfhearted glare at him, opening your mouth to reprimand your boyfriend, only to pause when you saw the guilt-ridden expression on his face.

"Oh, Yuji..." you say softly, sitting down on your sleeping bag and opening your arms out for him to cuddle into you.

He obliges, like he always does—the pink-haired boy never turning down the opportunity to be the little spoon.

You stay like that for a minute or so, with Yuji's face buried in your chest, limbs entangled with one another, woven so tightly you didn't know where you started and he ended—just soaking up each other's warmth.

"Mmmh... baby...?" Yuji mumbles, his voice muffled by your shirt.

"Yeah...?"

"I love you. So much."

"..."

"I love you too, Yuji."

A/N: I need to protect this boy from all harm istg shrfkejkjalwk

[ivelle-serenity]

Skateboard 16

Wind breaker

fem bodied reader | smut | action | pwp | jayjo/fml | vinny/fml | wooin/fml | joker/fml | hyuk/fml | owen/fml | enemies to lovers | angsty | the other woman (?) | reverse harem | fluff | SLOW BURN! | all characters featured are 18+

author's note: hi everyone! i'm sorry for ghosting you for months. school has been so stressful that i didn't even get a chance to read updates from wind breaker. BUT I'm back! thank you all for reading my story!

✧˖° — windbreaker men

✧˖° — mdni, smut, description of not safe for work content.

✧˖° — this is a story not one shot.

I slowly opened my eyes, feeling a strange tightness in my stomach. It was like I was about to throw up. I glanced around, trying to figure out where I was, and then looked down at where I was lying. I was on a soft mattress on the floor, my black shirt lifted slightly, exposing my stomach. My joggers were barely hanging on, the drawstring untied. I held my head and turned to the side.

My eyes widened. "What the—" I quickly covered my mouth, afraid of waking the person next to me. He was lying on his stomach, facing my direction, deep in sleep. His arms were wrapped around a pillow.

Why am I alone with Jay?! Panic surged through me. Even though I was dizzy, I managed to sit up. I frowned when my foot hit something—like a body. I felt a wave of relief when I looked down and saw June sleeping at our feet. Shaking my head, I fixed my hair. My gaze fell on Jay again. He looked so peaceful, fast asleep. Unlike when he’s awake—he’s intimidating, unapproachable.

My heart raced again, and I quickly averted my eyes, rubbing my temples. Did I do something terrible last night while I was drunk? I bit my lower lip, struggling to remember what had happened.

We already know.

I know something they don't.

Can you stay away from me from now on? Please?

"Holy shit. Oh, please don’t tell me—" My eyes went wide, and I scrambled off the mattress, trying to be careful not to wake the two of them. Once I was out of the room, I saw Dom sleeping on the floor, clutching Yuna in his arms. Aria was also fast asleep, mouth open. I scanned the room for Minu and Mia, but when I spotted them, I was surprised to see they were already awake.

Mia was making coffee for herself and Minu. They hadn’t noticed me yet, too busy chatting and smiling. What a lovely couple. When will I ever experience something like that? I sighed and immediately looked for my stuff.

"Demitra, you're awake!" Mia’s sudden voice startled me. I forced a smile and nodded, still searching for my bag, which Dom had apparently slept on. "Come join us. What do you want? Milk? Coffee? Or milked coffee?" she asked cheerfully.

"Water is fine," I said, giving her a small smile.

"Water in the morning? Are you an alien?" Minu joked. I chuckled and shook my head, pointing at my stomach.

"If I drink any of what Mia mentioned, I'll end up in the bathroom," I said, making them both laugh.

When Mia handed me the glass of water, I caught the two of them exchanging glances. It was as if they were communicating silently. These friends really had a habit of doing that, even when it was so obvious. After taking a sip, I set the glass down on the counter and crossed my arms, leaning against the sink.

"I know you two know something. You’re way too obvious," I joked, raising an eyebrow at them.

Mia looked flustered, her eyes darting to her boyfriend, as if silently begging him to speak for her. "W-Well, yesterday, Principal Nick told us something about you. About you being a professional rider—"

I burst out laughing. "Professional? Please, did Nick really say that?" I asked in disbelief. "I’m not. Let’s just say I’m an expert."

"But it's the same thing!" Mia jumped in. I just shrugged.

"It’s not," I said, still chuckling.

Minu suddenly grew serious, putting his glass down. "Why didn’t you tell us you're famous in England? As the underground princess? And that you’re friends with Owen from High Calvary!" he said, catching me off guard. Did Gramps really tell them everything? At this rate, I wouldn’t be surprised if he also mentioned my favorite food.

"Ew, don’t ever call me that again," I cringed. "And I’m not friends with him. I just know him." I avoided their gazes, just as I noticed Yuna stirring awake, probably overhearing our conversation.

"That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever heard in my life."

"Minu!"

I laughed as Mia scolded him. She gave me an apologetic look, clearly embarrassed by what her boyfriend had said. "You can ask him if you want." Please don’t.

"You beat him once," Yuna chimed in, despite just waking up.

"I don’t remember that," I replied, playing dumb. She just scoffed at me. "And, going back to what you said earlier, I’m not famous. I was just known in the underground. And that was years ago, so yeah, I’m not relevant there anymore," I said with a laugh, brushing it off.

"Stop being humble, Demitra," Minu said, and I just shot him a glare. "But the main point is, you're stronger than everyone else. I don't even understand how you lost to Jay. No offense to my best friend." He added, but my eyes widened when I saw Jay standing by the now-open sliding door.

"You're overthinking it," I replied, picking up my bag. "Even if you say I’m strong, biking isn’t my thing anymore. I’ve already told you that. I only got back into it to help you guys out." Everyone went silent at my words. "I did have fun helping you, though. Just make sure you explain things to your friend Shelly when she finds out about that video circulating. She's going to freak out seeing her 'clone' on the screen." I glanced over at Jay, who was standing with his arms crossed, leaning against the wall, watching me closely.

"Why do you sound like you’re leaving us after this?" We all turned in surprise to see Dom awake, scratching his head and clearly just having woken up.

"We still want you to be our friend, Demitra," June said softly, his eyes gentle, making my heart ache a little. I laughed to mask the emotions stirring inside me.

I knew they wouldn’t understand, but I needed to keep my distance. Nick already knew I was in Korea, and it wouldn’t be long before he told Shelly. The last thing I wanted was to run into her at school. Call me bitter, but I was only trying to protect myself. I couldn’t afford to get hurt again, especially not after being betrayed by my old friends.

"I appreciate it. We’re still friends, you know. And I’m not leaving." At least, not yet.

They made sure I had breakfast before I could even mention going home. As expected, Dom wouldn’t stop pestering me about how it felt to be famous in England, even asking for tips on how to beat international competitors, knowing I had beaten plenty in races before. Mia and the others, on the other hand, kept trying to pry into how I knew Owen, but I kept dodging the topic. The whole time, I could feel Jay’s eyes on me, and it was driving me crazy. Our conversation from last night kept replaying in my mind, making me avoid him even more.

"Last question, how did you learn to ride a bike?" Aria asked, stopping me in my tracks. The face of a man who had been absent from my life for so long immediately flashed in my mind. His earrings were the one thing I always remembered whenever he crossed my thoughts.

"From my dad," I said, half-truth, half-lie.

"Damn, I wish your dad could teach me!" June exclaimed.

"Never again. I’ll never take lessons from dads again. The last time I did, I nearly died from how hard Shelly’s dad pushed me," Dom said, practically on the verge of tears. I feigned surprise, though I knew all too well how strict Mark could be.

"Oh, Jay, where are you going?" Aria asked when she saw him stand up.

"Home," he replied shortly, not even glancing in my direction.

"Why don't you and Demitra leave together? So she has someone to walk with," Yuna suggested, and I nearly choked. Out of all the people who could’ve said that, it had to be her. I quickly shook my head.

"Then let’s go," Jay said coldly, addressing me directly. My mouth fell open in shock before I glared at him.

After saying my goodbyes to everyone, I hopped on my bike. I saw Jay already outside, waiting for me. I sighed before riding over to him. He was adjusting his helmet when he spoke.

"You should have told them you're leaving," he said, catching me off guard.

"What?"

His tired eyes looked straight at me. "You lied to them. Don’t just disappear without saying goodbye," he said before pedaling away.

My jaw dropped as I quickly followed him.

"What makes you think I’m leaving?"

"You literally said it last night."

I clenched my jaw, trying to think of an excuse. Hurry up, Demitra! Think of something. "I have no reason to leave, Jay," I lied, but he didn’t seem to care. His indifference made me even more annoyed. "Maybe you didn’t understand what I said last night. Why would I leave? I don’t have any enemies at Sunny High."

"Do you really want to talk about this?" he asked, his eyes locking onto mine. A chill ran down my spine.

"Yes! Tell me, Jay. Why would I leave?" I fired back. If you really don’t know anything, prove it. You’re hiding something. I could tell last night when you tried to act like you didn’t know. I’m not stupid.

He shook his head and sighed. "Stop asking me questions only you can answer," he said coldly. "If anything, I should be asking you that. Why are you leaving? Is there someone you’re scared to run into?"

His words struck a nerve.

"What the hell is your problem?" I snapped, making him stop. "I’ve had enough of your riddles, Jay. Just tell me what your issue is with me. You keep dropping hints about things you think you know, and it’s driving me insane. You keep looking at me like you’re waiting for something, and now this? Agreeing to walk me home after I literally told you to stay away from me?"

His expression shifted into something unreadable. "I don’t have a problem with you—"

"Then stop messing with me. If you know something, just say it. Tell me, what exactly did you hear from Nick?" I demanded, stopping my bike and glaring at him. His jaw tightened as he took a deep breath.

"I only told you what I heard last night, nothing more." He was lying again. What the hell? I nodded slowly, scoffing in disbelief. Ignoring him, I pedaled faster, trying to get away. Why does he keep messing with my head? What does he really know? From the way he talks, it's as if he knows everything about my secret.

I veered off the main route, taking a different path to put more distance between us. Thankfully, he didn’t try to follow. I wasn’t in the mood for another race with him. It took me 30 minutes to reach the park. I parked my bike and dropped myself onto the grass, frustrated. I held my head in my hands, trying to shake off the haunting memories.

"Is it true, Nick? Shelly’s engaged to Owen?"

"Yes, Demitra. Why? Didn’t Owen tell you? Aren’t you two close?" Nick had approached me, but I stepped back, covering my mouth. My body trembled at his words. After all this time, Owen is engaged to my friend? And Shelly knew? They both kept this from me?

Tears, which I had been trying to hold back, finally spilled over. "Demitra, why are you—" Nick began, but I cut him off.

I gripped my hair tightly, burying my face in my knees as the tears streamed down. I couldn’t understand why I still felt so much pain after all these years. I should’ve moved on by now. I should’ve forgotten them, but why was this happening to me? Why do the people I’ve been trying to forget keep coming back? My heart tightened painfully in my chest.

"I didn’t let you go just to see you cry."

I froze at the voice. Lifting my head, I saw Vinny leaning against his motorcycle, hands in the pockets of his leather jacket. I quickly looked away, wiping my tears.

"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the race?" I changed the subject.

"It seems you really don’t care about the Sabbath, huh? The race ended a while ago," he said, lighting a cigarette. He even offered me one, but I shook my head. He raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised I wasn’t smoking.

"Did they find out?" I asked quietly.

"See this?" He pointed to a bruise on his cheek. "That's your boyfriend’s doing," he said before tossing the cigarette, even though he hadn’t taken a puff.

"I don’t have a boyfriend," I shot back, giving him a glare.

"Wooin is a smart guy. No one can fool him," he muttered, staring straight ahead at the road. "They’re pissed. Not just at me, though."

I sighed. "I’m sorry. You fought because of me," I apologized, feeling guilty.

"We were already fighting long before this, even without you," he said casually, lying down on the grass. "So tell me, why are you here? Did Hummingbird finally kick you out after using you?" He looked at me sharply.

"You know your friends aren’t like that," I said, meeting his gaze with equal intensity.