#once i get my energy back i might expand on this (not promised)

[cathymee]

How do you think Mr. Boatman will react about El Filibusterismo?

anon friend…i spent 5 minutes staring at this ask because i wasn't sure who mr. boatman was…i'm sorry if you weren't referring to elias, but i'm going to talk about elias lmfaoo i'm so sorry i am an idiot

** spoilers for noli and fili!! but i won't go into that much detail for each and every plot points in the book

i'm very curious about that myself!! especially since rizal apparently regretted killing elias off (can't remember the specific letter but i'm sure googling it would yield the source! i am just very lazy atm) because he was sure he wouldn't be able to write a sequel. if he was in good health as he wrote the last parts of noli, what would've changed? what role would elias play in the fili? would simoun still exist? i wish jose would've gone to detail on what he originally planned

but one thing we could be sure about though is that elias would be so fucking pissed. the man he sacrificed his life for, for reason/s we aren't even sure about — is it selfless love? is it a sense of brotherhood? a sense of "you and your ignorance are a danger to my country - you need to leave and stay away before you cause more damage to this already twisted system" or of "you deserve happiness and you wouldn't achieve it here, you need to leave - you cannot rot in here like the rest of us would"? both? all of this? — just ran around doing the opposite of what elias would've wanted to achieve and had been striving to achieve before he even came along. plotted a revolution rooted in hatred and vengeance, a revolution that pays no mind to the actual people of the country, only driven for simoun to play out his revenge and hurt those who have hurt him.

and elias understands vengeance. he understands loss and fear, of having everything get taken away from him. he understands the motivations of crisostomo, why he did what he'd have done - it had always been cris who had had his eyes closed and his ears covered, who refused to understand what elias stood for from his place of privilege - but what the fuck, you know? because in the end all the suffering simoun had caused were for nothing. he didn't get to save maria, nor change something in the system like he 'wanted' to. nothing, not one positive effect. those who were in power still remained in power, but he made his people suffer even more to enforce his miserable, tyrannical beliefs.

but i also feel like he knew that it would've been inevitable. from their conversations on elias' boat, from the fact that crisostomo refused to be swayed from his ignorance. so i feel like letting himself die there under the balete feels like a loss of hope — a sense of giving up and letting crisostomo be, without any semblance of hope that crisostomo would do the right thing. instead he passes this hope to basilio instead, the figure of the youth — and it was the youth in the form of isagani that foiled simoun's plans in the end, and the opposite of vengeance - love - that motivated him to do it.

so tl;dr: he'd slap the shit out of crisostomo (but would still forgive him) and would fistbump isagani in the afterlife /hj

ETA✨: i forgot that mc&i kind of expanded on this!! & only kind of because of klay's influence!! even then i feel like the writers did well with how they wrote elfili!elias — he absolutely hates simoun's guts but his devotion for him still hasn't worn off at all. this attitude still fits on bookcanon!elias i think!

[etherfabric]

How the Universe provides for you + Songs

Choose a pile by which picture you resonate with the most.

If your mind is too busy to clearly decide, take a few deep breaths, and use the finger of your non-dominant hand to hover over the images. One will give off the most subtle yet prominent signals, like tingles, a magnetic pull, or temperature. This is your pile. Multiples are also possible.

You are the ultimate authority over your life. I merely provide my perspective. Sometimes the Universe lines you up with something that doesn't resonate with your truth, so you have contrast to find out what does. Never give away your power.

Pile 1

Strength, 3 of Pentacles

You have loyal allies in your challenges. A lot of unforeseen inconveniences you can't seem to avoid are in your energy, but this time, you feel the support - be it physical incarnations of kindred spirits, or those from the other realm connected to you. Yes, your heart is pounding and your knees are shaking, and these instances definitely aren't what you would've put on your wish list in a million years - but you surprise yourself with your bravery amidst it all. You thrive in collaboration with likeminded people, even in the face of your antagonists. The Universe is sending you storms so you can see how well you build your structure, and feel like the badass boundary expert your past self dreamed they could be.

This was a test, and you passed with flying colors. All your hard inner work is tangibly paying off, and you feel elated and proud - rightfully so.

Pile 2

Queen of Pentacles, The Fool

You finally stopped caring so much. You figured out where (or with whom) you lose the energy you so desperately missed all this time, and despite the struggles of letting go, you are now light as a feather. But in contrast to the past, where you were simply too scared to attach fully, so what else is there to do but float... you can now fall back on and draw from the deep roots you grew in fertile ground. Nourishment tailored to your needs is in constant supply, and plenty of opportunities to extend that generosity onto are emerging on the horizon. But this time, you know what to look for to have it reciprocated.

There might be people you still deem generally lovable you had to leave behind, and trust that hearing their criticism or seeing the effect of your absence on them will never truly stop hurting - but you know your worth and needs better than ever, and are determined to ultimately look ahead to the promising future. The Universe provides for all, and not just through you.

Pile 3

7 of Wands, 7 of Pentacles

The Universe is fueling your fierce protector side. You respect your own time more than ever, and see the value of patience with yourself. Your vulnerability is no longer a source of shame, it has become your most precious inspiration. Outside disturbances can't faze you out of your serenity with your true self. You worked hard for where you are, and you are not letting anyone counterproductive get close to it. Take the various toxic coping mechanisms projected onto you as the compliments that they are - you trusted in your balance, followed what felt right, and are reaping the rewards, while others still cling to the very same mindset that starts itching once you are around.

You understand the delicate relationship between healthy aggression and egotistical overkill, and are a role model for those wanting to follow you. The blessings you have already received are shining brighter than ever, and it's only the beginning. Isn't it so worth it being seen as the bad guy? Your people love you for what you are doing for them. No one can take this away from you, because you know how to keep it - becoming more authentic every chance you get.

Pile 4

2 of Swords, The Hermit

I can imagine you clicking on this particular reading with a kind of scoff. "Oh yeah? Providing for me? I see fuck all." Dare I recommend to expand your understanding in which ways one can receive...? I see you clinging onto promises you kind of already know aren't very, well, promising. But for some reason you only want it that way, almost to try to prove a point no one even challenged you on. Your idea of what you need and what you want have no space for differences inbetween. This might not sound pretty or comforting - I feel awfully confrontational saying this to you actually, and my Cancer Mars is shaking like a leaf - but I see the Universe providing you with an ultimatum.

Drop the rope if you truly want happiness (and not just validation for how great all of your ideas are), or be stuck in the frustration eating away at you. Look at what you already have. Yes, it's not the ultimate dream, but you have to first step inside of you to be able to receive. Because inside of you is where you will feel the love that's on its way to you - not craning your neck out as far as you can, desperate for a crumb to roll by.

[alice-angel12x]

Life + Death is a Balance

Death Au + Origin Au

In the beginning, there was only Time and Space. Space created a realm for them to exist in, but Time was not satisfied with just that. Time asked Space for Something to Happen, but she was content with simply existing and sleeping. Time was tired of the unchanging darkness, so gathered some of his power and poured it into a small being.

The antlered being opened his eyes, revealing emerald pools.

"W-what am I?" the new creation asked Time.

"I shall call you... Life. And you will fill this void with anything and everything. Whatever your little brain can imagine," Time said simply.

Life looked around and saw nothing about empty darkness. So letting their magic flow for the first time, Life focused all his power in one spot. When suddenly it exploded and created a Big Bang!

And light filled the void for the first time. Space awoke to the sudden brightness, and questioned Time what he had done.

"You would not entertain me, so I made my own entertainment. I promise not to bother you anymore. As long as Life is around and all that he creates," Time bargained with a smirk.

For a while, Space didn't see anything wrong with this arrangement. However, as things went on the Void started to fill with all of Life's creation, and Space complained to Time about the tight space.

"Well I can't stop him, I guess you're just gonna have to make more Room," Time said simply.

"Can't you control your own creation?!" Space growled.

"Well, I wouldn't have had to make him if you did more with your energy. So do what you were meant to do and Expand," Time said coldly.

So she did just that and made more room, but Time made no attempt to retrain Life. So the young begin kept creating, forcing Space to create more room. Soon Space had to make dimensions and an alternate universe to contain everything.

Space eventually had enough and decided to do something to something to get back at Time. So she two made something. Something stronger than Life.

"Who am I? And what is the purpose of my creation?" The new being asked.

"You are Death, and You are going to destroy all Life," Space ordered. "Destroy everything."

"Of course," Death bowed.

And thus the long war between life and Death. Death would senselessly destroy all life World by world. At such a rate that Life couldn't keep up. So much room was reclaimed, finally giving Space time to rest.

Life had enough and laid a trap for Death. When Life finally got Death where he wanted them, he sealed away a large portion of Death's power. Death could no longer destroy the world in one blow like they used to.

With Death's power weakened, they had to become smarter. So they created the pledge, Monsters, and disasters. But to really spit in Life's face, Death twisted Life's creations. Animals began to eat one another, and humans and other intelligent beings turned on each other.

Life had enough of Death and planned to finish this war once and for all. The two fought, destroying things around them in their battle. Sadly a small elf caravan was unfortunate enough to be in the line of sight of the beings.

Death saw them in the distance, and Space's words echoed in their ear. Death with all their might shoved Life to the ground and pinned them with their sword.

Life noticed what Death was about to do, and cried out for the Elves to run. He begged For Death to leave them out of their fight, but they slaughtered them all without an ounce of pity.

Life watched with pure horror as Death ripped through the mortals. "Your A Monster!" Life cried out in sorrow and rage.

Death Just stared down at Life and ran off to cause more Havoic. But Life would not just let this go, so he cursed Death to be feared and hated by all things that live. So to spite Life, they created the underworld. To hold all the souls they collect and take from Life.

Life tried to create other godlike beings to aid in the fight with Death, but it did little to help. Other than serving as eyes for Life, they mostly liked ruling over the mortals of their surviving worlds. Some even ally themselves with Death, some by choice and a few for other reasons.

With some helping hands, Death was able to spread destruction at a faster rate. So in one final attack Life, managed to trap Death and impression them deep and a lifeless planet. Of course, this also greatly weaken Life too, as he retreated to his home to recover.

Time didn't want his fun to end, so after a while, he weakened the barrier just enough. As he did so, he whispered promises in the underworld gods' ears, that they could become the strongest if they could take Death's power. Only one Underworld god did not buy into those words, and that was Hades.

But when the others freed Death, the god immediately attacked the weakened Death. Luckily, Death managed to escape but was left badly hurt and vulnerable.

________________________________________

After managing to escape to another world, Death sat down in a lone forest and winced in pain. But Death knew they were not alone. Though they knew they can't be killed, they were so weakened a mere human could overpower them in this state.

So they sat and glared as the bushes began to shake and rustle, only to stare in confusion as a human child stepped out. What Made Death even more confused was that the child wasn't frightened by them.

They were scared of something behind them, as the little girl ran and hide behind Death. Before Death could even possess what was happening, two vicious wolves appeared from the bush. The leading one jumped and bit down on Death's arm. Death glared and grabbed the wolf by the throat and used it as a club on the second wolf.

With a pained cry from the wolves the two beasts quickly ran, tails between their legs. the Little stared in awe as Death turned to look at this strange child.

"Your... So... COOL!!" The girl awed as she hugged them.

(Death.Exe has stopped working)

Death didn't know what to do, think, or say at that moment. The warm feeling in their chest was something foreign to them.

"Ah, your hurt! Don't go anywhere, I'll ask mommy for healing potions. I'll be back as soon as I can," The Little girl promised as she dashed off the way she came.

Death still hadn't said anything as they just watched in confusion.

"What...was that?" Death asked themselves as they placed a hand over their chest. the source of the warm feeling came from.

And as the girl promised she returned with some healing potions. Sadly before Death could even turn down the offer, the little girl shoved a bottle into Death's mouth. The girl smiled proudly as she believed she was saving someone, but Death eventually spat the bottle and the potion.

"Wha! No, You have to drink your medicine!" The little 9-year-old scolded.

"No," Death smirked as the little one huffed in frustration.

"I don't want you to die! Please take the medicine?!" The girl began to cry.

With a sigh, Death decided to be nice for once and pretend to consume the potion. The little girl smiled as sat next to them and began to talk about everything and anything.

"Oh, what's your name? Sorry I forget to ask sometimes," The girl smiled.

"I don't have one, call me whatever you like," Death said simply.

"Okay! Hmmm, I'll call you Y/n," The girl hugged.

And long after Death got better, the little girl continued to seek them out. Death watched as the little grow, and as her friend she showed everything the world had to offer.

For the first time ever, Death would down and smell the roses. And when the little girl would leave for the night, death would continue to explore and observe everything.

One day, the girl didn't come. So Death snuck to the edge of the village to see what was happening. As they got close they could feel a wave of sadness throughout the village. With little power, they recovered and transformed into a Nightingale. From the wall, they could see a parade of injured warriors.

The little girl later would explain how there was a bigger town nearby, trying to "Bully" them into giving them all their food. Sadly things got bad and now they were fighting. Her father went out to fight and died.

A heavy and cold feeling tightened inside their chest. Later that night the girl and Death walked along the hollowed grounds of the burial. Many know widowed wives were still at the graves, crying over the soil of their loved ones.

Death soon saw the little girl do the same. With a new pair of eyes, for the first time saw the consequences of what they brought. The wails and cries of the mournful filled Death's ears.

'Am... Am I ... Am I Evil?' Death silently asked themselves. 'My master said that this was necessary. She said to destroy everything.'

"What's wrong Y/n? Is your dad buried here too? Or other loved ones?" The little girl asked.

"Loved...ones?" Death asked. "No, I have no such thing. And... I don't deserve to be loved."

"Well!" The little one jumped up and hugged Y/n. "You have one know. And Mommy says everyone should have at least one."

Death slowly and hesitantly patted the girl's head, but the girl had to let go eventually. Cause Death had no body warmth whatsoever.

As the "little" Girl grew older, she would share her dreams and wishes with Death. Y/n smiled slightly as they watched her grow older, found a loving husband, and eventually formed the family she always dreamed of.

As Death wandered the forests, the once little girl called out to them. She had her newborn daughter with her. She said she wanted to Y/n to meet the new member of Y/n's loved ones. Death stared down at the new mortal, and the baby stared back.

Daughter-like mother, the baby laughed and reached out to death, wanting to be held. Death cringed a bit as they stepped back a step, but the girl handed the baby to Y/n. Death held the baby and was stiff as the baby reached up to them.

They were internally panicked when they felt a pair of tiny hands on their cheeks. Death looked down to see the baby smiling as examining them. As they stared suddenly their vision started to blur as something fell from their eyes.

"W-what is this," Death panicked as they handed the baby back to its mother.

"Oh my, I don't think I've ever seen you cry before," The woman gasped as she tried to wipe Death's tears.

"I don't understand what's happening?" Death gasped as they tried to get rid of their tears.

The woman just smiled and pulled Y/n(death) into a warm hug. This time Death was quick to reciprocate, but they did have one question.

"Why aren't you terrified of me?! I was cursed to scare everyone away?" Death sobbed.

"I'm not sure. It's probably My unique magic, which protects me from curses," the woman answered with a shrug. "And you could have hurt me all these years, but you didn't."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Sadly Time had other plans. While Death was roaming the world, taking in the beauty of it all. When they suddenly felt a sudden large amount of flaming life being snuffed out.

Death tried to get back to the town, but a lesser being of the underworld blocked their path. Yet, Death made quick work of it and ran towards the town. As they got onto the familiar path toward the town.

"Y/N!" the woman cried as she ran, covered in soot and blood.

She was running with her child in her arms, fear in her eyes. But upon the sight of Y/n coming to her aid, she smiled as she reached out for them. When an arrow to the heart snuffed out her candle flame of life.

Death reached out and caught her and the baby before they could hit the ground. Death looked down in horror as the woman lay lifeless and her baby cried out for her. The soldiers that were hunting the two froze in their tracks at the sight of the stranger, a wave of terror washed over them as Death slowly looked up at them.

Yet before they could even scream, Death had finished them off. Sadly this was not enough to quell their blazing fires of wrath. They hunted down the enemy soldiers and went on to the village itself. When Death's wrath finally went out, nothing of the enemy village remained.

As Y/n returned to the woman's village, they saw the great damage to this once-peaceful town. The only survivors were the children of this town, whom the enemy was planning to enslave.

Y/n knew that they couldn't help with their curse as strong, and Life was never going to lift it. So they had no choice but to plead and beg to Time and Space.

Space simply chastised her creation for suddenly deciding to slow down on their purpose. She tells them because of this, the void is starting to fill again. So Y/n turned to Time and pleaded for his help.

Time uncharacteristically of him decided to help Y/n this once. So he made a pendant that would repress the curse for about 3 decades. Though once time is up, the pendant will need to restore itself for at least a century or two.

So with this tiny aid, Y/n quickly returned to the village and rounded up all the children. They helped them mourn by burying the dead and staying for the day.

But Y/n knew what would happen if they stay for too long. After some convincing Y/n managed to get the children to follow, and far away from the enemy and their allies.

And they found this place, which will later in the future be called Harveston. Y/n would stay with the children and raise them as best they could. Teaching them, raising them, Playing with them, and even giving the children each individual attention.

As the children and town grew, and Y/n's time was about to end, the woman's daughter, now 29. Meet with Y/n at the edge of the apple orchard.

"Y/n, you've been distant lately? What's wrong?" The girl asked.

"I'm dying?" Y/n lied.

"W-what! No, you can't die. We all still need you, I need you," The girl teared up. "Is that why you made Pierre mayor?"

"He is a kind heart boy, with a good head on his shoulders. I know he will do whatever it takes to protect you all," Y/n explained.

"We all lost our parents. And You show up, give a chance at life, and being a parent to us all," The said, getting choked up.

"I wish your mother was here. She was a good friend and dreamed of having a family, an amazing daughter," Y/n reminisce.

"What was her name?" The girl asked.

"Her name... Was Reine Felmier. So your full name is Marie Felmier," Y/n smiled.

"W-would I be everything she hoped if she were here?" Marie asked..

"You would surpass what she could have ever hoped for," Y/n said gently.

A week later Y/n "Died". Leaving the town's people devastated, but when the dust cleared Y/n quickly left the town. With 30 years of new experience, Y/n new things had to change. So the first thing they did was erase the underworlds, and either let souls wander their world, or turn them into stars to light up the night sky.

Life noticed the sudden lights in the vast darkness of the void, and could only stare in wonder. As he stared out into the void.

"Look Out! It's Death!" The Jerrys cried out for their boss.

Life gasped as he got into a fighting stance, but Death just stood, not even raising their blades. The Jerrys gathered the souls and ran away from the scene

"Sir Life, I have not come to fight. Simply to apologize and discuss some things," Death said, but Life quickly tackled them and pinned them down to the ground.

Sadly Life was not too keen on listening, not after the many time Death had tried to trick them in the past. He quickly began to press the end of his staff at Death's neck.

"Don't you dare attempt to fool me again!" Life growled. "And Even if this was genuine, I would never accept it. Not after all the terrible things you've done."

"I know. I corrupt your creations, I create things to make them suffer, and for I time I took without thinking. And I understand that you will never forgive, and I am truly sorry. I simply wish to discuss an important matter with you," Death tried to reason, but Life teleported Death far from his home.

Saddened but not surprised, Y/n was left with no choice but to continue on. And to attempt equilibrium, to sadly kill off to make room for new life. Yet this was difficult since Life just kept making more and more without restraint.

Space hated that her creation was becoming docile and soft. So she called to the remaining once underworld gods and granted them powers on pare with Life and Death. She commanded them to pick up the slack.

So the 6 gods turned their sight on the tree of Origin, at Life. So, like a hurricane, they stormed the home of Souls and Life.

---------------------

(200 years later

Life hung by his wrists as sharp chains of obsidian bound him to the ceiling. The gods of chaos stormed the tree, destroying the little souls that had yet to live. Captured life and dragged him to a long-dead world, deep in its cold core.

The Obsidian chains dug into his tan olive skin as ichor ran down his arms. The cruel beings tortured the god of life. They whipped and ripped at his skin, hammered off his antlers, and forcibly possessed his body. Forcing him to create an abomination of destruction, and releasing them on worlds.

Life could hear the horrified screams of the mortals as they are snuffed out. He tried to call for help from Time, but he never answered. Life hung his head as he tried to think of another way out, but the enchanted chains blocked his powers. The other gods turned their back on their creator. Wanted some sort of selfish gain out of his death.

His aids at home didn't have the strength to compete with beings like his captors. As he hung there a terrible and sad thought came to his mind.

'If I were to die, Time could simply make another... Another being of Life, so why waste his efforts. I knew Time only saw me as a tool for his own amusement. Space hated me, and never told me why when I asked her. Instead, she just created someone to destroy me. I'm valued by no one,'

As he was about to give up, the scream of bloody murder caught his attention. A god of chaos lay dead at... Death's feet. Death slowly approached Life, as he quickly shut his eyes waiting for the worst.

When suddenly with a crack, he felt his body fall. Only to suddenly feel a pair of cold arms catch him before he could hit the ground. Life looked up to his enemy, but black spots filled his vision as he eventually passed out.

____________________________________________________

Pt. 1 ends here

to be continued. Part 2 here

[crusherthedoctor]

What's your WIP?

Prepare for cringe, and make 'em twinge.

What if: Paper Mario... but with Eggman. :D :D :D

I promise it's not as dumb as it sounds... okay maybe it is. But hear me out, I didn't bash non-matching LEGO bricks together mindlessly, there's some comprehensive logic behind it. :<

A while back, during the weekly groaning about Eggman being undermined and treated like shit, I pointed out that when you think about it, he would actually be a very serious problem if he were inserted into other works unrelated to Sonic. I said this mostly out of humor, but it's a what-if that I've thought about more seriously from time to time, including very recently, where I wondered out loud if Eggman would be more respected in-media and out if he were from literally any other franchise. Because as much as I hate to say it, it does feel that way sometimes...

Meanwhile, as you've no doubt gained from my recent posting, I've been more Paper Mario-pilled than ever before, due to how much the TTYD remake gives me passion during a time where I've been sorely needing it, as well as just remembering how much I love TTYD and the original N64 game in general. This happiness inspires me to do something with it out of celebration, so I think to myself "Hey, all my works so far have been strictly Sonic, but I'm currently having a down period with the series due to my ferocious apathy towards most of the current stuff, so how about I expand my horizon and experiment with something that doesn't have that confounded hedgehog in it for the time being? Maybe having something else would also keep me rejuvenated with Stellar, since I could bounce between different projects! But what can I come up with for Paper Chris Pratt?"

Then I think back to the first point, and… yeah. Does what it says on the tin, doesn't it. In an effort to make it sound less Now That's What I Call Mid-00's Fanfiction.Net Vol. 1, think of it like the anti-Storybook: instead of Sonic being catapulted into an unfamiliar world, and having to help out with what's going on… Eggman gets catapulted into an unfamiliar world, takes advantage of the fact that Sonic isn't there to stop him like the opportunistic bastard he is, and the (Paper) Mario universe is forced to deal with a threat that they have no context for.

Yes, I know it's very fanfic-y, but at this point, between this and Sonudis, I think my entire selling point(?) might be taking the most fanfic ideas you can think of (short of killing off canon characters or dumping them in a high school AU, because not even I would do that), and playing them as authentically and respectfully to the source material and official characterizations as possible. What kind of trouble would Eggman be able to cause in a world with no Sonic or Chaos Emeralds around? What scheme would he come up with? What would this very different cast of characters make of him, and vice versa? Is this just an excuse to write for Vivian to cope with the fact that she'll probably once again not appear in later games? (The answer is yes.)

If I decide to actually create this Frankenstein abomination of an idea, it probably won't be uploaded on this site since I'm not sure how many Mario fans I have in the audience so to speak. Then again... @beevean seems to have carved a place for herself in the Castlevania fic community on here, so maybe I should?

(Also, this would NOT lead into a full-on Mario and Sonic crossover, or some convoluted cinematic universe nonsense. It would just be a unique character study, nothing more. Plus, just the idea of a traditional Paper Mario adventure where the villain is inexplicably Eggman is my kind of shitpost energy.)

[pahrak-the-sinnoh-slizer]

Games in 2023: One Piece Odyssey

The announcement of a brand new One Piece RPG tapped into some sort of childhood instinct in me, the kind where you hear two things you love are being combined into one thing and gasp in awe.  Child Pahrak would be pleasantly surprised to learn that I’ve finally gotten caught up on One Piece, a dream that always seemed just out of reach, up there with completing the Pokedex. (Which I’ve also done!  He’ll be so impressed.) But this isn’t about him: I’m an adult now, and I have to pay for my own anime RPGs.  Odyssey doesn’t exactly reinvent the wheel, but it does deliver what it promises, and I found myself having a lot of fun along the way.

The game sees the Straw Hats shipwrecked on a mysterious island named Waford, where a less-than-friendly meeting with one of the island’s inhabitants results in them losing most of the strength they’ve built up over their journey.  Obviously they’re going to need that back, so it’s time to scour the island and conquer its trials in order to get back out there searching for the One Piece!

You’re able to run around the overworld as Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Chopper, or Robin, and can switch between them with great ease. (Even once Franky and Brook join the party later in the game, they can’t be controlled in the overworld.  Unfortunate as this is, I can see why both of them would have some unique logistical concerns, so I won’t complain much.) All of them have some unique action(s), but not all are unlocked right away, and the game expects you to main Luffy to use his stretching powers to grapple across very frequent gaps and use Observation Haki to scan for hidden items and enemies with EXP bonuses.  Chopper is small enough to fit through narrow passages, Zoro can cut through metal doors, and there are certain items that can only be retrieved using Usopp’s slingshot; Nami, Sanji, and Robin all have unique items that only they can see, though they will remark if you approach one while not playing as them.  And, while you can’t run around as Franky, once he joins back up with the crew he can build bridges to open new areas.  It can feel a bit uneven, but…I was probably going to mostly play as Luffy anyway, so I can’t say it’s a huge flaw.

Battles involves fighting enemies in multiple areas at once, exploiting rock-paper-scissors style weaknesses, and tagging crew mates in and out of your 4-person active party.  Personally I like it!  It’s not too complex to understand, but does add its own extra layer to combat.  Part of me wonders if you could expand this to have the whole crew fighting across the various areas, but that might be a bit too unwieldy.  Fans will see plenty of familiar techniques at their disposal: Usopp has a mix of long-range explosive techniques (only 1 Pop Green, sadly) and gag techniques that only work if the specific enemy is dumb enough to fall for it; Chopper obviously is your healer, but he also gets a decent variety of attacking skills, including the ability to activate Monster Point for a few turns; Franky has a lineup of high cost but high damage group attacks that can really wreak havoc if you manage your TP (tension points) right.  I do feel like Zoro’s many, many available techniques are a bit samey, though, and Sanji doesn’t really have anything that stands out.  Despite having a long list of techniques, Luffy’s are just different enough to feel like a decent variety, and I really like that they turned Gear 2 into its own mechanic. (You can activate it either by itself for a mere 5 TP, or by using any of several “Jet” skills, and increase Luffy’s strength and speed for a few turns; I always try to keep it on.) Why they didn’t do this for Diable Jambe is beyond me.

Back at the story, the only inhabitants of Waford (aside from the monsters) are two humans: another shipwrecked pirate named Adio, who is able to summon massive energy gauntlets with his Grab-Grab Fruit powers; and a girl named Lim, who has some inherent connection to the island and is the one who took away the Straw Hats’ powers.  I found Adio pretty interesting, and was never entirely sure how much I should trust him until everything was revealed at the end.  Lim is an emotionless character who gradually warms up to the crew and comes out of her shell as the story goes on.  Again, not reinventing the wheel, but I like her well enough, and she’s involved in some interesting plot developments later on.  It’s Adio who convinces Lim that they should help the Straw Hats regain their powers, which have now been scattered all across the island in the form of special cubes.  Defeating bosses on the island gets you cubes, restoring more abilities and enhancing the ones you’ve already restored.  Some (most?) skills gain slots which can be filled with Cube Fragments you find scattered around the overworld; each fragment is tied to a specific character, and you can equip them to any available slots through the skill menu. (They can also be unequipped and rearranged at any time.) When a skill has 3 slots filled, it levels up, which usually means dealing more damage.  Seems pretty straightforward, right?  Well, here’s the catch: in order to fully absorb the cubes and regain all of their lost abilities, the Straw Hats need to venture into the strange dimension known as Memoria, a world made from their memories that asks them to relive their past accomplishments to process the cubes.

Basically, the game alternates between chapters where you explore a dungeon on Waford, and chapters where you relive a past One Piece arc; specifically, you go through Alabasta, Water Seven, Marineford, and Dressrosa.  I think how one feels about this particular facet of the game will go a long way toward determining whether or not they’ll enjoy it as a whole.  Anime games have always made a habit of retracing their source’s story arcs, and while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, it can get a bit…tiring at times.  That we’re explicitly “revisiting” these memories rather than simply advancing through the base story as the game’s main plot is something that might muddy the experience for some; Lim tells us off the bat that “memories are fuzzy” and some things might happen a bit differently, but there are scant few occasions where this plot point feels put to good use.  If you were expecting timeline shenanigans akin to the Dragon Ball Xenoverse games, you’ll have to look elsewhere.  It’s a bit disappointing, even frustrating at times: I was really looking forward to an interaction between Robin and the memory world’s Crocodile, but even when they’re in the same room, neither says a single word to the other!  I don’t want to admonish the game for not fulfilling my specific expectations, but that one…we can all agree that one is a notable oversight, yes?

Still, I want to judge the game for what it actually does rather than what I wish it did.  And what it does is lead us through some delightful new environments alongside a number of old favorites; Alabasta, Water Seven, and Marineford are some of my favorite arcs, and I know I’m not alone in that opinion.  It was nice to see Vivi again.  It was nice to see Iceberg and Tyrannosaurus.  Marineford is the one place we do see Jimbei, and crucially, the game capitalizes on the fact that this time, the Straw Hats are there to help Luffy through what just might be the single worst day of his life. (Though you STILL don’t have Brook for this part.  So it rings just a tiny bit hollow with him absent.  You’d think it’d be the other way around with all the hollow space between his bones, YOHOHOHO!!) And there’s one particularly good moment in Dressrosa that I think most fans will enjoy, but I don’t dare spoil what it is.  It was nice to see so many interactions big and small shared among the crew, especially the handful of sidequests that take 3 of them seemingly at random and see how they solve a problem without having the full crew to rely on.

Right, the sidequests!  So many sidequests, be they those limited crew stories, hunting down other pirates to claim their bounties, or more standard RPG fare like “kill these enemies” or “bring me these items”.  The game is surprisingly packed with things to do, with an in-game Objectives menu that rewards you for almost every single one (a total of 182!).  It’s, well, a full RPG!  I’ve got around 80 hours on my file and I’m still a few collectibles short of the Platinum.  Even that doesn’t track the bestiary, which I’d like to fill just for my own sake, or that last Zoro Cube Fragment I’m missing, or seeing if I can get the characters to the maximum level.  I got this far before the remaining tasks got grindy enough that I took an extended break.  This might also be the time to mention that there are locked treasure chests all over the place, giving you plenty of incentive to figure out how to get your hands on the key that opens them. (I won’t tell you how, but it was something I was already doing because it’s fun in its own right.) There’s also mountains of hidden lore if that’s your thing: several journals you can find scattered about, as well as extra snippets unlocked by picking up those special items only Robin can see.  This is a meaty game for sure.

I don’t want to spoil the story, so I’ll just say that despite some…misgivings regarding the endgame, I’d still say I like the plot overall.  It’s got enough of that distinct One Piece feel to it that I couldn’t help but enjoy it.  That’s true of every part of the game, really: you could go on all day about how certain things could’ve been “done better”, and there’s some merit there, but the game still does a fine job of everything and distinguishes itself by fully embracing One Piece’s unique charm.  Will it be GOTY?  No.  Do I recommend it?  Absolutely!  And I eagerly look forward to what comes next, be it DLC, a direct sequel, or a separate game done in the same style.  Even if none of that comes to pass, though, One Piece Odyssey is an entertaining and very filling experience, and one that’s yours for the taking.

Shortlist of things I want in a hypothetical follow-up:

-More Franky and Brook, ideally playable in the overworld.  I’d like to see Brook get a field action, maybe running across water?  Or something musical.

-Playable Jimbei!

-Faster overworld movement.  Maybe it’s just that the plot setup reminds me so much of Sonic Frontiers, but I wanted to get around MUCH faster than I was able to. (Though you do get fast travel relatively early on, and that does help.)

-More costumes would be nice (bring back Robin’s hat 2k5ever)

-If we stick with the Memoria concept, I’d like to see events play out way more differently than in canon.  I think it’d also be best if they used an entirely different set of arcs to avoid being too samey (the one I’d want most is Whole Cake Island, Skypeia probably has good odds, you could do a whole game that’s just Wano…)

-Let other characters who have Observation Haki use it in the field same as Luffy

-I do love that Conqueror’s Haki is a skill in battle, but I’m also curious about it as a field action that either stuns or removes weak enemies.

-Diable Jambe really should be a full mechanic

-Maybe a meter for Armament Haki you can expend to augment your attacks?

-There’s a whole slew of more techniques I want to see: more Pop Greens, General Franky, have Nami using Zeus, etc.

-Going on a bit of a tangent about Gears, I’d like more Gear 3 techniques for sure (Odyssey only has Gigant Pistol), and ideally the Gear 4 forms would last a little while like Gear 2 already does.  One thing they could maybe try is, when leveling up Luffy’s skills using Cube Fragments, you can choose to apply a Gear to it?  Like, when strengthening Gum-Gum Pistol, you have the option to make it Jet Pistol, or Gigant Pistol, or Kong Gun, and each would have their own unique benefits.  Though, that might be too complicated…still, fun to think about.

-There are a few techniques in Odyssey that deal extra damage to enemies with certain Devil Fruit types, and I think it’d be neat to see more effects that take this into consideration.  In that event, though, it would probably be best to have a more even spread of the various types: the Zoan buster move isn’t super useful when there’s only 2 Zoan bosses in the game, especially compared to there being 5 Logia bosses.

-I like the Bounty system, but I think it’d stand out more if they were minor characters from the anime/manga, maybe even some filler characters.  Let me hunt down Foxy and get paid for sending him to his death.

[self-proclaimed-chaotic-good]

Batman's Future Sidekick | Bruce Wayne x Reader

Prompt: Single Parent(s)

Words: 1198

Fandom: The Batman

A/N: Had this idea in my head for a while now and if I feel like it, I might expand on it more. Dick Grayson’s a preteen in this one. It’s mostly just a breakfast conversation.

Summary: You’re best friends with Bruce Wayne and Batman’s sidekick. When you came back from a business trip, you found that there’s another stubborn and reckless boy you have to help look after.

-

You knew practically every route to Wayne Tower, the drive over was merely through muscle memory. It had been a year into Bruce’s endeavor as the masked man of Gotham when you found out about him. As much as he wanted you to be far removed from Batman’s business, after you had helped solve a big case of his, there was no convincing you from staying away.

You were crime fighting partners, now, so you both made a promise to tell each other everything. Which was why it came as a shock when you came back from a business trip to see a little boy sitting on top of the stairs.

The boy perked up once he saw you and gasped. “Bruce! They’re here!” he shouted, stomping away to find the man.

Alfred appeared, shaking his head as he watched the boy run up the stairs towards the rooms. “Welcome back. I trust that everything went well on your trip?” he greeted, giving you a friendly hug.

“Everything went smoothly, Al. I’m just glad to be back,” you said, “Who’s the kid?”

“Ah!” He nodded, as if he just remembered about it. “I see Bruce hasn’t told you. That boy, I swear. I told him to tell you as soon as he decided to take him in. You’ve heard about the Flying Graysons incident?”

You nodded. “It was horrible what happened. So, he’s…”

“The only survivor, yes. Richard Grayson, though he insisted we call him Dick,” Alfred said, leading you over to the round table.

Dory came out of nowhere with a plate of cut fruits and tea. “I know you’re exhausted, dear, but I don’t want you sleeping on an empty stomach.”

“Thank you, Dory.”

She hummed with a smile, then made her way back to attend to her other duties. Alfred sat down next to you, sorting out his paperwork, then sighed, looking up towards the staircase ahead. As you popped a sliced apple into your mouth, you heard a ruckus coming from said stairs and saw Dick dragging a sluggish Bruce down, the gap between their energy levels was astonishing but not surprising. Bruce finally lifted his head and smiled at you.

“You’re back,” he said, ruffling Dick’s unruly hair before scooting him aside to get to you.

“I am,” you said with amusement, “And you have some explaining to do.”

Bruce grunted, lazily looking over at the small boy who noisily sat between you and Alfred, stealing some of your fruits. There was a small fond smile on his face as he sat down next to you, watching the boy 

“Richard is my new ward,” Bruce simply said, also picking at your fruits. 

Dory tutted at them, placing down two plates of pancakes, one chocolate chip with banana slices for Dick and one blueberry with extra blueberries on the side for Bruce. They muttered their thanks before digging in. Your eyebrows raised to your forehead as you observed them and how the young boy drowned his pancakes in syrup before taking a large bite while Bruce poured a little bit of syrup and took one modest bite.

“He eats like how you used to,” you pointed out to Bruce with a smile.

Alfred hid his chuckle behind a file, avoiding the empty glare from Bruce. “This is rather tame in comparison,” he said.

“Ah, right. Bruce used to spread an overflowing amount of whip cream between each pancake layer and then drown it in syrup.”

“That sounds amazing,” Dick said through his mouthful of pancake.

Bruce redirected his glare to you and you had the decency to act sheepish. “See, you’re giving him ideas. If you’re here to bully me and be a bad influence on my ward, you can leave.”

You gasped, holding a hand to your heart. “No! After all we’ve been through?”

Dick looked between you two and grinned. “So, you two are dating, then. Bruce said you guys weren’t but he talks about you a lot. I mean, he barely talks in the first place, but when he does, it’s about work or you.”

Bruce suddenly needed intense concentration on eating his breakfast, turning away whenever he needed to sip his coffee. After a moment, he said, “He’s exaggerating. He wants me to ground him so he doesn’t have to come to the soup kitchen today.”

“Soup kitchen? You’re doing volunteer work now?”

Bruce nodded. “It’s… kind of nice to help out like that. And it’s not like Richard’s going to do any heavy lifting.”

“I don’t mind helping,” Dick corrected him, “It’s just that I want to help in some other way. After they come to the kitchen, they still have to go back to their lives out there at some ratty place with all those bad guys running around. It’s not fair that I get to come back home to a place like this when they can’t. Soup’s not going to defeat bad guys and make them safe, superheroes are.”

You exchanged a look with Bruce. “Superheroes, huh?” Dick nodded excitedly, humming. “Well, not all heroes wear capes, as the saying goes. Help where you can and don’t lose sight of what matters the most. A hero’s purpose isn’t to fight bad guys, it’s to protect people from the bad guys.”

“Eh, what’s the difference?” Dick scrunched up his nose in confusion.

“Heroes inspire hope. Hope spreads like wildfire and burns the darkness away. If you let the hate for the bad guys overrule your will to protect others, it will swallow you up. For example, if a bully pushes down a kid at school, what do you do? Do you go after the bully or do you help the kid up?”

“Go after the bully, of course! If I go after them, they won’t hurt anyone again.”

“But you should make sure the kid is okay first before you go running off,” Bruce interjected.

Dick frowned. “I mean, I guess. But, what if the bully gets away?”

“They won’t get away forever and if you help the kid, it might inspire others to help, too. Bullies target the vulnerable, but if everyone’s working together, they can’t hurt anyone so easily.”

“I think I get it now. So, like Batman or the new mayor, from what I heard. The mayor’s always saying that if the people worked together, the city would become stronger. Is that also why Batman doesn’t work alone anymore? They said there’s another masked person with Batman now.”

You hid a knowing smile. With how the conversation was going, this boy might catch on faster than you thought. You wondered how Bruce had done it, sneaking out of the tower and making sure that the boy was fast asleep in his own bed and not wandering around the halls or looking for him.

“One of the many reasons.”

“Huh. Cool. I want to be his other sidekick!” Dick jabbed his fork in the air with enthusiasm.

Bruce snorted, shaking his head. “Maybe when you’re older, I’ll see if I can get in touch with him.”

You patted his arm in sympathy. “It might come sooner than you think,” you whispered.

“That’s what I’m worried about.”

[just-my-fandom]

Heartache (Shouta Aizawa x Pro-Hero! Reader)

A/N: Ooo-kay, finally back from my month long, needed break from writing. I’m kinda attached to MHA at the moment, so that is what I am taking requests for.

Summary; The two times where two of UAs teachers nearly lose their lives to protect their students, mindful of the child they have at home.

Request; Can we have some pro hero love where reader (pro hero) and Mr. Aizawa have a daughter and Thirteen who is readers best friend is said daughters god mom while Present Mic is the god dad plz

Akari- Japanese name meaning “Light”. Readers quirk is the ability to send large waves of energy a selective distance, and shield herself with said energy.

Two months prior- U.A.

“Alright, everyone,”

Shouta Aizawa seemed well too calm this early morning. Too calm despite the fact that he is holding a child on his hip, who looked all too like him.

“Today’s lesson is simple. Based on communication,” He starts, “Communication when it comes to citizens. This lesson will teach you how to comfort an injured or scared citizen during an attack, specifically women and children,”

“Uh, Mr. Aizawa?” Denki Kaminari was first to speak up, hand half raised in confusion, “Why do you have a baby?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Mina leans forward, eyes wide and gleaming happily, “That’s Mr. Aizawas and Neutron Shields baby! She looks just like him,”

“Lets not jump to conclusions,” Shouta hums, but the barely visible smirk on his lips lets his class know that the toddler is, indeed, his own, “I brought Akari here today for the lesson that will be taught. You will all need to learn and know how to comfort a child during an attack if the child has been separated from its parents,”

“Only, however,” Shoutas eyebrow raise causes his students to watch as his daughter leaned against his shoulder and glanced outward to the class, “Akari does have a quirk. It is similar to her mother’s, as Mina predicted, Neutron Shields. Meaning if she were to get defensive, you would have to calm the child from harming herself more, or you,”

“So we’re fighting a little brat,” Bakugou mumbles, rolling his eyes so when he looked back up to his teacher, said mans hair had raised and his eyes glowed red,

“Insult my daughter again,” Shouta threatens, instantly dropping his intimidating act when Akaris hand reaches up to pat his face. With a deep sigh, Shouta looks away from his daughter to his students, “No. Youre not fighting her. Simply consult her into comfort so she knows you’re not a threat. Akaris been taught how to control her quirk on demand,”

Lowering the toddler onto the floor, Shouta steps back as soon as his daughter began to tear up, twisting to reach for her father with quiet sniffles.

“Well?” Shouta eyes the students, when Akari hiccups and looks back to the teenagers, “She’s distressed,”

“I got this,” Kirishima is first to push out of his desk, hands out and steps slow as he approached the child, “Hey, Akari, it’s okay,”

Akari is swift to shake her head and twist her upper body away from the red head. On cue, a purple bubble surrounds herself, Bakugous brows pinching as Dekis mouth dropped, hand reaching over to pat Todorokis shoulder in amazement.

The bubble then expands to hit Kirishima and throw him off his feet, landing hard on his back so Akari blinked and giggled, loudly, the bubble then vanishing.

“Me next!” Mina exclaims, Akaris eyes flicking from the red head and to the pink skinned girl, who knelt down next to Kirishima and opened-closed her hands.

Hesitantly, Akami leant forward onto her hands and knees, ready to crawl up to the girl, but instead blinked so a bubble formed around Mina, the bubble suddenly shrinking so Mina shrieked and pressed her hands to the sides in an attempt to stop the shied like bubble from crushing her.

“Akari,” Shouta speaks up, his daughter blinking so the bubble vanished, her eyes shifting to her father before looking back to the class, Mina exhaling in relief and backing away.

“Come on, shit for brains,” Bakugou scoffs, standing to his feet so Akari stared at him, “We’ve trained with Neutron Shield before. The brats no different,”

“Akari is a child,” Todoroki reminds, on his own feet and stepping forward so Akari instantly reached up, the fire and ice powered male pausing to stare at her.

Her whine when he makes no move to pick her up causes him to do so, Shouta smirking as Akari stared at Bakugou and stuck her thumb into her mouth.

“It seems she has a favorite,”

USJ Training Facility

You weren’t sure what happened. As soon as you were in line of view, two of Shoutas students- Uraraka and Ashido- immediately began to panic from where they knelt down next to Thirteens collapsed figure.

“Mrs. Aizawa!” Mina cries, tears in her eyes as her hand rests on Thirteens shoulder, “Thirteen- she took a hit-!”

You are quick to move next to Ochaco, hand opposite of Minas so Thirteens head turned and her eyes weakly looked up at you,

“Thirteen,” You call, softly, “Hey. It’s okay,”

“I tried to protect them,” Thirteen murmurs, and you nod, sliding your arms beneath hers to heave her to her feet, Mina and Ochaco quick to stick their hands out in case she fell,

“You did,” You promise, “You did amazing, Thirteen,” Your eyes flick to the class, “Where’s Iida?”

“Getting help,” Mina heaves, shakily, “What- what’s going to happen to Thirteen?”

“Shes going to be okay,” You reassure, and shift Thirteens arm around your shoulders so she fell slump against your side, “I’m going to make sure of that,” Your eyes shift to your best friend, “Do you hear me, Thirteen? Akari needs her godmother in her life,”

“I’ll always be here for that angel,” Thirteen breathily laughs, watching as you looked over in alarm at the sounds of fighting, “Eraserhead. He stayed behind,”

“He can hold his own,” You murmur, but the doubt in your tone causes Thirteen to grasp the back of your suit,

“Go help him,” Thirteen demands, extending her free hand for Mina to drape at her shoulders, “I’ll be fine,”

You hesitantly peel away from the pro-hero, glancing between her and where the fighting could be heard, before you sprint down the steps, looking up in time to see Noumu, Shigarakis weapon, on top of your collapsed husband.

“Hey!” You call, raising your hands so a bubble surrounded you, expanding in a rush to hit Noumu so he stumbled off his feet, a good distance away from Shoutas figure.

Protect him. Protect him now.

With quick steps, you throw out a hand that forms a bright (Favorite/Color) bubble, which you slide under and next to Shoutas collapsed form so the bubble shielded both you and him.

“I always wondered when I would get to fight the famous Eraserhead and Neutron Shield at once,” Shigaraki speaks, your eyes shifting over your shoulder where he stood at one end of your bubble, while Noumu stood opposite of his leader,

“But defeating them both?” Shigaraki chuckles, “A dream come true,”

The first punch Noumu sends against your bubble creates severe damage to your shield. It cracks beneath his fist, giving the monster the confidence he needs to continue punching and clawing at the barrier,

“Mrs. Aizawa can’t take them both- not on her own,” Midoryia heaves from his spot in the water, where he, Mineta, and Asui hid a good distance from the battle.

“She has shields!” Mineta reminds, shivering in a panic, “She’ll be fine!”

“Ribbit, her bubble can only take a certain amount of damage before it breaks,” Asui states, “And the damage her shields take, her body takes,”

Where’s All Might when you need him?

With a weak breath, you slide your hand beneath Shoutas head, resting it in your lap as your muscles screamed for you to drop your shields.

“Honey,” You call, pleadingly, free hand resting over Shoutas chest- thankful to feel a heartbeat, “Baby, wake up. Please,”

Looking up, you watch as the top of your bubble cracks and shrivels in defeat, Noumu stepping back enough for the shield to drop and leave not only you, but now Shouta, vulnerable.

With a startled gasp, you raise your hand as Noumu then lunged at you, the shield only protecting your face, so the punch Noumu sends forces you feet back, tumbling backwards and onto your front, leaving Shouta out in the open yet again.

Fingernails grabbing at dirt, you moan out in pain, forcing your arms to push you to sit up, raising your head in time for Noumus claws to latch at your shoulders, shoving you onto your back, his weight forcing you to gasp for air at the pressure of him on your chest,

Raising a hand that clawed at his arm, you are quick to throw a shied, the edge slicing Noumus face so he only jerked back then growled down at you.

With wide eyes, you look over to Shoutas form, then up, at a distanced- “I am here!”

Noumus weight lifts as he departs, your lungs expanding as you gasped, coughing as you sit up, slowly moving up to Shoutas form.

“Help me get him up,” You demand, when Tsuyu and Mineta rush next to you, “Please,”

“Mrs. Aizawa- you’re bleeding!” Mineta stammers, your hand raising to your mouth where blood dripped.

Shaking your head, you allow All Might to take your hand and help you stand, “I’m not worried about me. Get him out of here,”

Camp Attack

Why were you struggling so hard to fight a girl with a knife? Maybe it was because you just couldn’t stomach the thought that your students- your husband were still somewhere in these woods, being attacked by someone else.

Your breaths are shallow by the time you pull yourself from your thoughts. With a hand grasping Togas wrist that held the knife, your eyes wildly search behind you, landing on two of your students,

“Asui, Uraraka, go,” You heave, grunting when Toga shoves at your front, “Go, now!”

Uraraka gasps in fear when Togas foot skillfully hooks around your ankle, jerking so you fell on your back with a pained grunt. Toga is quick to pin over top of you, knife held against the skin of your neck.

“Aren’t you supposed to be a pro-hero?” Toga grins, voice high as you narrow your eyes and suck in a deep breath through the nose, “You’ve gotten weak after having that stupid baby of yours,”

“Do not ever mention my child,” You heave, raising a hand so a shield formed, that instantly vanished when Togas knife slid across your neck, startling you to gasp in quick breaths,

“Mrs. Aizawa!” The two students shriek, your eyes pinching shut as you form a small bubble around you, successfully pushing Toga off of you so you could sit up and cough, hand covered in dark red blood.

You look over and form a bubble around Asui and Uraraka, looking back up at Toga when she giggles, dragging the blood covered knife across the bubble,

“You think a small bubble can stop me from getting what I want?” With a quick jab, the knife plunges into the bubble so you flinched and raised a hand to your neck.

Vision blurry, you blink, the bubble shattering so Toga giggled and lunges forward, not before a tongue shoots out and wraps around her, tossing her to the side and into a tree nearby,

“Mrs. Aizawa!” Uraraka quickly moves next to you, eyes wide as she watches you slowly lower back onto the dirt in defeat, “Mrs. Aizawa, stay awake!” Uraraka looks to Asui, alarmed to find Toga gone, “Tsu, go get help!”

“Uraraka, Asui!” The two girls look over, to find a group- consisting of Midoryia, Todoroki, Bakugou, Shoji, and Tokoyami- rushing towards them, “Come on! We’re heading back to the Camp!”

“Our pace will be slower with two injuries,” Todoroki states, eyes flicking to Midoryia on Shojis back, before he moves to help lift you up, your arms around his and Urarakas shoulders, “We need to find Mr. Aizawa, first and foremost,”

“They said we can use our powers to defend ourselves, and now we have two injured, one being a teacher,” Shoji states, “So don’t let anyone stop you,”

Present

“You shouldn’t be moving around so much,”

You hum through a light laugh, lifting your head from where you rocked back and forth on your feet, your daughter curled against you.

“I’m not dying, Shouta. I’ll be fine,” You feel Akaris hand graze across the stitches at your neck, as you turn to face your husband.

“That’s nothing to joke about,” Shouta steps up, sliding his hands under Akaris arms to peel her away from you and against his own shoulder,

“Just thought I’d give a little pay back for the heart attack you gave me during the USJ incident,” You shrug, frowning at Shoutas glare, “Okay. Sorry. But honestly, honey, I’m okay. Recovery Girl said I should be fully healed by next week,”

“Until then you should be resting,” You roll your eyes at Shoutas statement, turning to then pluck a shirt from your pile of laundry to fold,

“Take your own advance, honey. You haven’t slept a full night in three weeks,” You turn, hand at your hip, “Why don’t we call Hizashi and let him take Akari for a day or two? Give us time to rest?”

“If you want another kid, just ask,” Shouta smirks, your lips parting as he moves around you, laying Akari in her own bed in the corner,

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it,”

“Do I, though?” Shoutas hands rest at your hips, and you smile, hand at his jaw to pull his lips against yours.

“Seriously, though,” You hum, “Hizashi would love to see his god daughter. I promised Thirteen I’d help her with her own recovery,”

“I swear you love Thirteen more than me,”

“Oh, definitely. No questions asked,”

“Fine, go ask her for another kid,”

“Nah, I like my kids to have your attitude,”

“Oh, sure,”

“Really!”

[purpleshaded15]

Percy’s Reflection

A/N: A little over TLOVM S1 Ep 12 aftermath (but before the dragon attack ending.) Obviously the show won’t be able to delve into Percy’s struggle in the aftermath, but here’s my take on it. 

-----

It was quite a sunny day when Vox Machina returned to Emon. Finally, they got to sleep, rest and have a moment of peace to themselves. In just a day, Pike have returned to the Keep as well. And now the full team was together again!

Percy, as usual, had kept to himself again - only appearing on their dining area just to let them know he's still alive. Sometimes he smiled and joined in with their silly antics but most of his time was just spent in his workshop. The others were worried, but they knew to give him time.

It isn’t easy... to suddenly just move on.

He should be happy, and deep down he is. Whitestone is saved, Cassandra is alive, and he's free. But is he really...?

It's there whenever he's alone without distractions. It's there at the back of his head. Gnawing at him. Trying to claw its way out.

Who is he?

He tried to keep his brain busy to keep these thoughts at bay. He wasn't ready to know. He might not like the answer. Sometimes, when his mind wandered free, his thoughts returned to Vex. He was pointing the gun at her. He felt weak and helpless to stop it. His eyes shed tears he didn't notice, but his mouth curved into a sinister smile.

He snapped himself out whenever he gets flashbacks. He worked himself to exhaustion so his mind wouldn't have the energy to dream.

He still has nightmares.

And the list has just been expanded...

Percy laid out the iron parts that have already cooled, and started to fit and assemble the pieces that would fix the gun he named 'Retort.' Once he saw the gun, he knew Ripley's error immediately, and fixing it was easy. He just needed to create new parts that would fit since any parts spared from 'The List' no longer fits.

Ripley's design is terrible, he thought.

Knock, knock...

Keyleth sheepishly opened the workshop door and popped her head in, "Percy?"

"Yeah?" Percy turned to her in acknowledgement.

"Need help?" Keyleth obviously with spare time has been stopping by on his workshop and offers help. But it just was an excuse to check up on him. She let herself in and looked worried at the gun he's holding. "That's not gonna be cursed, is it?" 

"No. I'm just repairing it." 

"Anyway... uhh, can you come with me?" she fidgeted with her thumbs. 

"What is it now?" he scowled.

"We are kinda worried. So... we're having an intervention." 

Percy sighed. He put the gun down and shelved it along with the parts he needed to assemble. He knew it would be best to get this over with.

He followed Keyleth back into the dining room. The whole party's there, playfully bantering with each other. 

"Hey Percy!" Pike waved as soon as they enter the room. 

"Hey Pike. Glad to have you back," answered Percy with a smile. 

"So uhh... they told me what happened after I disappeared. A demon huh?" Everyone else was quiet, as if they were talking about a touchy subject. It certainly had crossed their minds throughout the days after, but never thought of bringing it up. They're all still dealing with the aftermath, and knew Percy has been trying to escape dealing with it through work.

Percy looked at her and said reassuringly, "It's gone. Believe me." 

"I need to see." Pike offered her hand out. "Or we can always bring you to a temple, like you promised." 

Percy sighed again. "Okay." He knelt in front of her like he did way back in that dungeon.

Pike did her divine magic to detect evil on his soul. Her eyes flashed in divine power, as she peered into Percy's soul. This time, there was no dark entity shrouding him, no unwanted presence other than Percy himself. But his soul is not as clear as others...

She could still see black smoke that wreathe out of him, from his mouth, his eyes, and the dark scars on his soul. His right shoulder covered in dark claw-like hand from when it tried to convince him to take one last shot. Both of his wrist covered in darkness from its controlling grasps. The darkness spanned from these spots like cracks on his soul. The shoulder scar expands to his torso and his neck. While the wrist scar expanded to his hands. And then his eyes, glowing in unnatural yellow with black sclera. 

It no doubt tainted his soul. 

"It's... gone... But..." Pike muttered, unsure of how to say it out loud. "Let me try something. Hold out your hand." 

Percy gave her his right hand. Pike took out some components and cast Greater Restoration on his wrist covered in black. The spell was cast successfully and light glowed towards his hand. 

The light fades, but the dark scar still remained. "It didn't work..."

"What is it dear?" asked Vex curiously and sat next to her. "Is everything okay?"

"Percy, your soul is... tainted. Maybe we should get you to a temple...?" 

Percy's face was crestfallen but he already knew that would be the case. Harboring a demon for years that's trying to corrupt him, wouldn't exactly leave his soul in good shape. He composed himself, stood up, and walked away from Pike's magic. 

"It's too late. The damage is already done," he said coldly while walking out of the door. "I'm going back to work." 

They all stared at him in worry.

When he got back to the workshop, he was seething. He felt this anger and rage boil up inside him. And he didn't know what to do. So he thrashed his place, a bit, until he saw a mirror on the wall. 

"You..." he said as venomously as he could muster. He punched his reflection in the mirror so that it shattered into pieces. His right hand started to bleed from the cuts. But it didn’t matter. It didn’t feel like anything compared to the utter hatred he felt towards himself. 

He sat by the corner of that wall, broken glasses in front of him. He cupped his head with his hands, the right side smeared his white hair with his own blood. His suppressed thoughts started to race.

What have I done? Have I condemned myself? I deserve this. Why doesn't it feel better? I feel worse.  Empty.  Lost.

Without the demon, he felt unbalanced. For without a doubt, its (unknown) fuel & influence on his vengeance had given him a goal and reason to live, at least for most of his miserable past 5 years. Now, he was unsure of himself. He looked down at the broken mirrors. Which are his pieces, and which are the demon's?

"Who am I really?" 

He caught a glimpse of himself in one of the small shards. He lifted it up with his bleeding hand and saw the reflection of his right eye, staring back at him with a yellow glow enveloped in black sclera. He started to notice the black smoke enveloping him like a blanket comforting a child. He knew. He was left with nothing but his own darkness. 

"So be it."

[patchworkstudies]

advice from a friend in recovery

[part II: the depression edition]

since my last advice post is somehow still getting traction despite having been posted almost three years ago, i thought it might be a decent idea to expand it into a series! when i wrote that post i was dealing with the aftermath of traumatic events, experiencing a developing post traumatic stress disorder for the first time. what i needed most out of recovery was a way to build moments of solace and joy into my daily life, so that’s what that post focused on.

three years down the line, my recovery goals have changed quite a bit. my focus right now is on learning strategies to cope with major depressive episodes and figuring out how to pick up the pieces after days or weeks of barely being able to get out of bed. here’s what i’ve got down so far!

does waking up (and staying awake) in the morning feel like an insurmountable hurdle right now? same. it’s rough.

make your alarm impossible to ignore. turn the volume all the way up and set it to a song you can’t physically resist screaming along to (or a song you hate so much you would do literally anything to turn it off. either works). bonus points if you know you’ll have to sprint to turn it off before it wakes up others in your household.

you will feel worse if you turn the alarm off and crawl back into bed. trust me. you will. if you hit snooze, you’ll feel groggy and annoyed in ten minutes. if you turn the alarm off entirely, you’ll wake up in five hours and still feel like shit anyways.

make it as hard as possible for yourself to get back into bed. keep your alarm across the room from your bed, behind an obstacle course. the more things you’ve had to do before you can turn the alarm off, the easier it will be to just get up instead of going back to sleep.

if you can, use an app like this that sets your alarm to only turn off when you scan a certain barcode. set the barcode to something you keep on the complete opposite side of your house.

better yet, set the barcode to your tube of toothpaste. by the time you’re able to turn your alarm off, you’ll already be in the bathroom holding the toothpaste. while you’re still on half-asleep autopilot, it’s much easier to say “fuck it” and brush your teeth before you can think twice.

having a hard time with personal hygiene, but your own body odor is making you feel a thousand times more depressed? yeah, i’ve been there.

get yourself some really strong deodorizing soap. drag yourself into the shower, spend ten seconds lathering the parts of your body that smell the worst (armpits, groin, anywhere you sweat a lot). rinse and repeat twice. the smell will be completely gone with minimal effort on your part.

don’t have the energy to shampoo, but greasy hair also making you feel gross? just use the bar soap on your hair too. yes it will dry your hair out, but it’s effective and you can always condition later if you feel better.

don’t have the energy to get into the shower or turn it on? if your pits are sweaty, just take the bar of soap and rub it in the sweat until it lathers. wipe off the soap residue. it will smell a thousand times better. (if your pits are not sweaty enough for this, a splash of water works great too).

your bedroom is such a mess that you can’t even imagine how you could start cleaning it? i know the feeling.

pick a corner. designate this your “clean corner.” literally shove the clutter away from this corner until you have a space big enough to sit down in. cleaning is less overwhelming when you have somewhere to retreat to.

personally, the bulk of my mess is usually dirty laundry that i have been putting off washing. forget about washing it right now. if you have a separate closet, pick up every piece of laundry on the floor and throw it into that closet to be dealt with later. close the door.

if you don’t have a separate closet, stuffing it into trash bags is another way to collect your dirty laundry and make it less visually overwhelming. trash bags can be stacked better than individual items of clothing, leaving you with more empty floor space.

the next easiest thing to get rid of is trash. if there’s so much trash around that picking up all of it at once is daunting, start with food waste. it is easy to identify and probably making your room smell.

out of sight, out of mind. the more you can shove the clutter into boxes, bags, closets, etc. to deal with later, the better. you can sort through it, pile by pile, when you have the time.

you don’t have to be perfect all of the time. or any of the time, even!

depression making it impossible for you to do the dishes? if you’re able to stock up on paper plates, cups, and disposable utensils, just use those instead. i promise, you are not singlehandedly destroying the environment by doing so.

out of clean clothing, but can’t muster up the energy to do laundry? spray your clothes with febreeze. wait a minute and then shake them out as hard as you can to air them out. congrats, you now have a single outfit that smells more like car air fresheners than body odor. (please do not do this with underwear. if you need to reuse underwear, turn it inside out).

cheat on your assignments. for fuck’s sake, if it won’t get you in trouble, just do it. academia is a sham, you have more important things to worry about, and you can always learn the information later when you’re not working against a deadline.

know that sometimes it is all you can do to stay alive. every breath you take is an accomplishment. on the days when you can’t even stand up, rolling over to the cooler side of the pillow is an accomplishment.

you are quite literally winning at life, by sheer virtue of not being dead right now. congratulations!

i’m proud of you.

[thechekhov]

So glad you decided to play Undertale! I think it would really suit you so I’m so happy you got into it! Could I have your thoughts about the game? I would LOVE to hear them. I’m ALL for long essays and rants, that’s my jam, but even just a small review from you would make me ecstatic!

Alright alright alright alright. 

I am ecstatic that someone asked because I have a lot to say AS ALWAYS. 

I’m gonna try to keep this readable, I swear. Will add pictures in between to keep things interesting. 

However, due to the length this will SURELY achieve, AND due to spoilers (and yes, laugh at me all you want, the game has been out for 5 years) I’ll put this under a cut. Read at your own (f)risk.

Metagaming - the game plays YOU

When I first started Undertale, I ‘knew’ these things:

there’s a stabby one with a knife, their name is chara

there’s a flower everyone hates

something something sans something something

and the last, and perhaps most important thing

you can spare your enemies to avoid killing them

The thing is. The THING IS. 

I did not realize how pervasive this strategy was. My thought at first was ‘okay, so I don’t have to kill EVERYONE.’

I had no idea that the reality was that I didn’t have to kill anyone.

I’m sure many others have already said this, but Undertale kind of changes the way you think about other games. It forces to you examine simply fighting your way through the RPG by introducing completely non-murder-y ways to resolve issues. This conversation-based combat style is not the first of its kind, I’m sure, but it’s also incredibly well done. It ties into the story, it ties into your decisions.

It ties into your decisions SO MUCH that it changes everything else in the outcome.

Undertale is a game well known for breaking the 4th wall. However, it does so in a strangely eerie, heart-wrenchingly real way. It teaches us that there are other solutions to conflicts - and it really... it really TEACHES us, you know?

Which is funny because to be honest, it took me a while to get the lesson.

(You may already be fully aware of this but yes, my first True Neutral Route was extremely organic. I legitimately had no idea that there was even more than one ending. I was just stumbling about er... killing. Out of habit.)

The beauty of this is that the game drives home that point even more effectively because I was fully unaware of my own bias. I had assumed that some enemies would require killing - DESPITE TORIEL SPECIFICALLY TELLING ME TO TALK TO THEM, and the entire Ruins tutorial being about Mercy. I killed the Dummy on accident (granted, it was due to me pressing the key too fast a few times) and didn’t think much of Toriel’s disapproval. I killed a few monsters because I saw my level was low and decided to automatically grind a little bit. 

By the time I got to Toriel, I was still not comfortable with the mechanic. I knew I could Spare her somehow - after all, she was a kind monster, and clearly an important character - but the Spare option didn’t yield promising results the first few times I chose it. I ran out of patience and decided that maybe... maybe it was like pokemon! 

Maybe I had to get her health down to a certain level before she would allow me to pass through.

Funny thing though.... you know what happens if you attack Toriel one too many times? Even if she has most of her health left? 

Yeah uh... it activates that one-hit-KO thing from No Mercy Route.

So of course, what happened? I hit her one too many times... and killed her! And of course, immediately panicked and reset. 

I got back to my previous save, Spared Toriel PROPERLY this time, and walked out of the ruins only to be confronted with my own reliance on the magical ‘redo’ button which was... apparently... not that magical.

Because it WASN’T a clean redo. Flowey apparently remembered. 

The idea that the game would KNOW about my previous attempts beyond the save file snapped me out of my casual Undertale playthrough. I realized that something was up - this game was not going to be like the others.

I think it was from this point on that I tried to be more careful, but again - I still hadn’t quite gotten the memo about not killing. I took down a few monsters around Snowdin. And when I got to Papyrus, I grew frustrated about not being able to beat him (I ended up losing several times and coming back to try again) and went off to grind SOME MORE because I figured that could raise my HP and increase my chances of holding off long enough to Spare him. 

(The incredible thing about this game is that actually, raising your level gives you only a slight advantage. You can be level 1 and carrying no items, and as long as you’re relatively proficient at dodging the bullet hell style projectiles you will have no issues.) 

Anyway, the point is that I realized I could spare the big monsters and did so readily - but I didn’t bother to spare many of the smaller ones. 

I figured it didn’t matter. 

And then I successfully evaded Undyne, gave her a cup of water, etc... and then went to her house to meet Papyrus, fully expecting her to befriend me anyway. 

And you know what happened?

“She said she won’t hang out with a murderer.“

I think that probably hit me the hardest at that point in the game. 

I had a bit ‘....oh’ moment at that point because I realized that the game would punish me for killing even the ‘not-important’ civilians of the Underground. It wasn’t about just sparing the ‘boss monsters’. My actions had consequences beyond just the ‘elite’ characters that we all tend to focus on.

Because yes, it made sense. It wasn’t about just Undyne - why WOULD she randomly be my friend after I killed tons of living beings?

From there on, I spared everyone, but didn’t reset. I decided to see how it would unravel.

The thing I want to talk about, which is a little difficult, is that...

It took me that long to learn that kindness was the answer. And that, in itself, ends up being a metaphor. 

It’s difficult to be kind if you have not been show how to be.

It’s difficult to change the way you behave (in a game or out of it) if all you know is using other methods.

It was hard enough to spare Toriel before I realized I had to just be very patient and trust that her attacks wouldn’t hit - though at first I thought she would just kill me! 

It was hard to avoid Papyrus’ attacks and I had to die several times before I successfully got through it. 

It was near impossible to fight Undyne because I legitimately had no idea Fleeing was an option. I struggled for ages at her stage, and I had to ask for help to understand what I could do.

And that’s actually honestly very true to life as well.

Being kind takes risk. Being kind takes effort. And sometimes, being kind means asking others HOW to be kind. 

When you choose to be kind, you risk being hurt, and you risk being trapped (Toriel). When you choose to be kind, you need to expand a lot more energy to succeed (Papyrus). When you choose to be kind, you need to sometimes reach out to others to show you how to properly do it (Undyne).

The rest of the playthrough probably went about as you expect. I completed the game, didn’t kill any Boss Monsters, fought to the end and... got that really unsatisfying Neutral Ending which felt strangely bittersweet. 

And of course, after I was done, I was prompted to go back and do a proper Pacifist Run. Which I did. I learned about the background of Determination, about Chara and Asriel... and about how everything came to be the way it was.

The thing that gets me the most about this game is how it serves as a direct parallel to how we use videogames. In fact, Undertale is a videogame... about videogames. 

Chara appears to be a direct metaphor for the people that use videogames to escape - to cope with whatever happened to them in The Overworld. Bad family life, or bad relationships or whatever we suffer - escapism through games is not, in itself, a new theme. 

Chara arrived in Undertale by dropping themself down a hole in the mountain, perhaps even seeking to end their life. They dropped into a world which offered them comfort and companionship, a new family and a new life - but in the end, their nature was destructive because their means to finding a solution inadvertently used other people as fodder. Asgore, Asriel - they used everyone else to complete their plans. It wasn’t about forming connections - it was about Completing the Quest. 

I wonder - did Chara even HAVE access to a MERCY option? 

Was their world one without the option of sparing someone? Did they only have the choice of acting - and was Mercy in the hands of whoever attacked them? I wonder how difficult it might have been for them. I wonder how that, in itself, shaped their perception of the world. 

I wonder if that’s why, during the No Mercy run, people recognize you as Chara? If they come back and attach themselves to your resonating DETERMINATION?

If this is true, was MERCY perhaps created later, brought into existence once Asriel himself made the choice to NOT fight, to turn back and flee, even after being attacked by humans in the Overworld? 

(It would be a nice parallel to Asgore DESTROYING the Mercy option when you enter the fight with him...)

...

In the end, I think Undertale is about many things, including video games. 

But it’s also hurting - and being hurt. 

It’s about how trauma can shape us, how we deal with feeling grief, and loss, and depression - and not being able to feel anything.

It’s about how we focus on goals and use DETERMINATION to keep going - even when whatever it is that’s driving us no longer has any SOUL. 

It’s about how our action have consequences, but they also carry the weight of a choice, and how powerful those choices are, and how powerless we feel when we aren’t given a choice - not to fight back, nor show mercy. 

I think that’s probably the reason this game resonated with so many people. It really brings something we love about videogames to the forefront - that ability to fight back, to have full and total control of our own lives...

And it also shows us how having that endless loop of repetitive grinding and fighting with zero consequences can lead to an incredible hollowness and make us numb to how we interact with real-life people. 

Anyway. 

Good game. 

[jimlingss]

Maybe Baby Retreat

➜ Words: 12.7k

➜ Genres: 50% Fluff, 50% Smut

➜ Summary: In an attempt to conceive, Taehyung discovers a five day retreat dedicated to help with the impregnation process but you're fairly certain that the entire thing is a scam.

[Day One]   Taehyung should be fucking you.   It’s a bit crass to be grumbling that he’s not sticking his sperm in you, but your fertile window begins today and if he really wants a kid as much as he says he does, you wouldn’t be on a godforsaken bus.    The yellow school bus jumps and jolts as it goes down the jagged, unpaved road. Every bump is felt in the back by ten folds as you’re rocked from side to side on the seat and not on your husband’s dick. Said man is too busy singing along with the guide that’s living it up with a mic in hand and his voice on the intercom. He’s trying to bring up the morale, but you’re not having it.   Instead, you turn to the window and stare out at the empty countryside that stretches across the horizon. There’s not a car in sight and if you swear to god if you’re being shipped to a serial killer’s farmhouse, you’re dragging Taehyung down to hell with you.   “You’re frowning, sweetheart,” he says while leaning over to you, flashing a blazing grin much to your chagrin. “You know stress isn’t good for the baby.”   “It’s not like it matters. There is no baby.”   “Not yet.” Taehyung throws an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into him as you scoff. You’re aware being a Debbie Downer isn’t going to help anyone but it’s hard to loosen up when you’re so on guard and skeptical about this whole thing. When you’re surrounded by noisy strangers who are all too overfamiliar.   You suppose it was your fault to begin with.   All those nights of staying up to read about tricks and tips of conceiving led Taehyung to discover the Baby Retreat. A five day sanctuary that ensures people will be able to conceive.    The moment you saw it, you were certain that the whole thing was a scam, but your sweet summer child husband was wholly convinced and no matter what you said, it wouldn’t change his mind.   “Who knows, it might actually work, right?! And if it doesn’t, then it looks fun anyway! When was the last time we had a vacation together?”   It’s also your fault for being so soft. You couldn’t shut Taehyung down when he was so enthusiastic, so here you are. You took off a week off work and on your fertile day, you’re shipped onto a school bus out into the middle of nowhere.   “Oh! Looks like we’re here, folks!” The vehicle slows as it turns into the gravel parking lot and the guide smiles as he peers out the windshield. “Welcome to the Baby Retreat! I hope you leave with a few buns in the oven! And if not, then don’t worry, you can still eat for two here!”   There’s a few snickers and once the bus parks, everyone gets up, slowly shuffling out and stretching their legs.   The air is sweltering hot and the sun beams down onto the back of your neck, making it uncomfortable to breathe. You’re panting with sweat built on your hairline as you drag your luggage through the grass. But no one seems bothered by it. Maybe because they’re excited that they’re here, they have the energy to fill the field with their chatter.    Even Taehyung is grinning and he’s a certified whiner when it comes to hot weather. The guy blasts the air conditioner during summer until it feels like it’s winter. Though you have an inkling it’s just a tactic so you can cuddle up to him for warmth before bed.   “Come on, slowpoke!” Taehyung breaks through your train of thought and then abandons you by running ahead like a hyperactive five year old.    “I’d be faster if you helped me!” Taehyung doesn’t hear you. You wonder if you married a child — but you suppose that’s why you called him the light of your life during your vows. Like Yoongi once said at the dinner reception, Taehyung’s excessive energy is indeed a double-edged sword.   You follow the stream of people to the center building, a modern wooden structure in the middle of the fifteen yurts that form a circle. It surprisingly looks alike to the advertisements, each with a porch and steps up to the door. The grass is verdant and pliant beneath your feet, the numerous trimmed trees around providing some nice shade and the flower beds give bright splashes of colour to the place. If this retreat wasn’t oddly centered around impregnation, you would’ve been convinced that it was a fancy camping resort.   “Welcome everyone! Welcome to the Baby Retreat! I hope the trip here wasn’t too bad!”   You finally join Taehyung’s side and look towards the stage in front of the main building. There’s a man with a half-moon smile and chubby cheeks in a loose tunic and taupe pants. He stands next to a woman in a baggy poncho holding a ukulele for reasons beyond you.   “I see some familiar faces here! To all those already familiar with the Baby Retreat, welcome home. I’ll try to keep this short and simple, so you’re not too bored.” He claps his hands together with a bright smile. You look around at the crowd to see elated expressions. “My name is Park Jimin and this is my girlfriend, Song Hyunjin. A little about us, we’ve been together for over ten years and yes, we have an open relationship with each other, but that does not mean we aren’t in love with each other.”   He draws her in, nuzzling into her without shame and she giggles. “To our new faces, trust me, you’ll find out soon enough.”   Jimin pulls away with an enormous grin. “We haven’t had any children ourselves, but don’t worry. We’re reproductive endocrinologists with proper training and medical degrees. But we started this retreat four years ago to take a more unconventional approach to reproduction. And for the next five days, we have the honour of hopefully helping you ladies conceive and you males impregnate your partner!”   There’s some exchanged smiles and Taehyung looks at you with hopeful eyes. It feels better to hear these people aren’t uneducated and talking out of their ass, but you’re still unsure how to feel.   Hyunjin laughs. “Not only that, our goal is to help you relax and truly deepen your relationship with your partner. While we can’t promise a hundred percent success rate, hopefully you’ll leave this place feeling more refreshed than you did before. With that being said, please feel free to come up and ask us any questions. We’re very open people who are more than happy to help you in your process of expanding your wonderful families. There is nothing more beautiful than pregnancy and birth.”   She jumps off the stage and grabs a wooden crate. With a smile, she begins passing out packs.   Jimin continues, “For the next five days, we’ll be helping everyone improve their diets and exercise habits while getting plenty of vitamin D. What my lovely Hyunjin is handing out now are your survival kits!”    “For men, fenugreek supplements are given to improve your sperm counts and for the ladies, there are prenatal vitamins and folic acid. There’s also a guide to the activities provided around here and a map, some sunscreen and other knick-knacks to remember your time here. Don’t worry, we won’t bombard you with any pregnancy pamphlets or information. I’m sure you’re tired of hearing about that.”   It’s a bit refreshing to hear. You’ve been neck deep in research about conception that it’s been hard lately — another reason that you agreed to Taehyung’s whims.   “Are you the Kim family?” Hyunjin asks and when you confirm it, she hands both you and Taehyung cute pouches. You reluctantly take it, but when you thank her, she happily smiles. “Welcome to the Baby Retreat.”   The introduction drags on for a bit more before Hyunjin admits that it’s hot and that everyone’s probably tired, so the meeting ends and you open your pouch and find information on your yurt.   “Not too bad, right?”    Taehyung can tell by the look on your face as you gaze up at your white-tented yurt.   “We’ll see,” you mumble and he takes the luggage, following behind you. “I thought we were going to spend five days in an orange tent, so I guess this is better by default.”   “An orange tent?” He laughs. “But I showed you the commercial! Did you not pay attention?”   “People lie on advertisements all the time, Tae.”   But to your surprise, the interior of the yurt is even better than expected. It looks like a cozy cabin, wooden panel walls that separate the full kitchen from the full bathroom and provides some privacy to where the queen sized bed is. Light comes in from the top, filling the space with luminescence. There’s a mini-fridge filled with goods, plush towels set on the table with a personalized welcome card, down duvets that are soft to the touch.    And it’s wrecked the moment Taehyung jumps on the bed with his arms and legs wide open like a starfish. He rolls over and props his head up with his hand — in the position where he often asks you in a breathy voice to paint him like one of your french girls. And he uses the same voice on you now while wiggling his brows, “Wanna ruin the sheets with me?”   You burst out laughing, but it sounds all too tempting. He could probably dump a load in you within five minutes, though you’re not sure if anyone could hear you from the outside. “Didn’t they say there’s planned activities in an hour? What if we don’t show up.”   “It’s fine. People come here for one reason anyway.” There’s a pause. “To fuck.”   You roll your eyes, setting your suitcase next to the bed and you look at the nightstand to notice mineral oil lubricants. You’re mildly impressed at the details. “Thanks, Captain Obvious.”   “They won’t miss us.” Taehyung’s own attention is taken to a wooden basket on a shelf of the irregular shaped bookshelf and he comes over, only to grin when he sees what’s inside. “Honey. I think we should have some fun tonight.”   You turn around, wondering what he’s up to now. But any snarky remarks die on your tongue when you find a leather whip in his left hand and a ten inch, neon pink dildo in his other hand.   “Is that...even sanitary?!”    You can’t imagine how many people have used it.   “We can find out.” Taehyung fiddles around with it, pushes a button and the dildo begins to rotate, making the both of you laugh. “Honey, we gotta give them five stars on Yelp! They have a communal sex toy bin for us to use! We can’t get this anywhere else.”   “Oh god. I’d rather not share my sex toys with anyone.” The two of you are interrupted by muffled folk music that begins to leak inside and it persuades you to go out. “C’mon, we should go check out what they have. If we have to spend five days here, we might as well meet some other people too and be social or whatever.”   Taehyung grins, tossing the dildo back into the basket and joining your side. “You’re liking this place, aren’t you?”   “No. I just think the yurt’s half-decent.”   Taehyung can see right through you, but it’s a bit too early for the ‘told you so’ spiel so he holds back and the both of you step outside of the yurt. There’s a few people hanging around and the weather is more bearable as the sun slowly begins moving and setting over the horizon. You meet friendly newlyweds who are surprisingly having their honeymoon here.   “We just can’t wait to have kids,” Rose, the young twenty three year old, says as she embraces her husband, Hoseok. They’re no strangers to publish displays of affection, openly kissing up on each other. It would make you a bit uncomfortable if not for how touchy Taehyung is as well.   When you first got together all those years ago, your friends teased you about it but it’s been years since. No one’s a stranger to how you plop yourself down on Taehyung’s lap or how he might kiss you and then steal your food right off of your own plate.   “When we saw that the retreat offered a honeymoon package, we just couldn’t resist,” Hoseok says, but you’re not sure if he’s talking to you and Taehyung or his wife with how much he gazes at her. It’s a sweet sight though. You remember that honeymoon period.   “Remember when we were that young?” you ask as you leave to the other side, giving the couple some much needed privacy. It was obvious they weren’t up for more conversation with the way they’re shifting and staring at one another.   “When you were still hot? Yeah. I do—” Taehyung bursts out laughing when you jab him. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding! You’re still hot, okay? The hottest chick here and you’d make the hottest MILF too.”   “Damn straight.”   The pair of you also run into another couple that’s older and appears a lot more comfortable with the place. “Oh, this is actually our second time here! The first time gave us the four year old troublemaker running amok back at home.”   You blink in surprise, suddenly more interested in the conversation. “This place...worked for you?”   “It sure did.” The woman, Dahyun, smiles. “Some people didn’t have as much luck as we did, but we had so much fun last time that we knew we just had to come back. We were actually staying in your yurt last time.”   She points and you swivel your head over, intrigued. “Huh.” Taehyung raises a brow, noticing how engaged you are and the corner of his mouth tugs.   Her husband, Seokjin, chuckles heartily. “We thought it was time to give our son a younger brother, so here we are! Tonight’s the welcome party and just a word of advice, I really recommend getting some of that grilled salmon. It’s absolutely delicious.”   “Just let them eat whatever they want, Jin,” his wife sighs in exasperation.   “I’m just saying! I would’ve liked to know last time — I would’ve gotten two plates before they ran out.”   “This is why the doctor told you to eat less of everything. You ate more than I did when I was pregnant with Youngjae.”   “I can’t help that I’m eating for three! For your information, I’m carrying the entire family on these broad, broad shoulders of mine. Soon, I’ll have to start eating for four.”   Dahyun turns to you and Taehyung who are amused at their bickering. “I’m sorry. Please ignore him.”   It’s not a bad place, at least not so far. You weren’t sure what you were anticipating, but on the entire way here, you were worried that it was a scam your poor husband fell for. Luckily though, it seemed like the accommodation is good and the people around are friendly and welcoming, coming from different kinds of backgrounds and walks of life. It makes you feel better about not having internet connection or being murdered in the middle of the night.   The welcoming party turns out to be fairly nice too, and like Seokjin said, the food is delicious.   It’s a buffet style with tables set out, full of what Jimin declares is antioxidant-rich foods. He and Hyunjin go on a tangent about the benefits, how soy and estrogen foods have been limited, how there’s an emphasis on fruits, vegetables, carbohydrates, proteins and folic acid, and you’re sorely impressed at the attention to detail they provide.   “Oh my god. The salmon is amazing and have you tried these beans, Tae?!”   Taehyung laughs as he watches you eat, eyes lifted to look at you across the rounded table. “I thought you hated beans.”   “I do. But try it.” You lift your fork and he happily leans over, taking a bite. He swallows it down and smiles at how you stuff your cheeks.   After dinner, the pair of you gather with the rest to watch a few performances held on the main stage. Jimin introduces other staff members who sing, dance and Hyunjin even does a number with her ukulele, belting out some indie songs while standing bare feet.   It’s bizarre and a bit surreal to be sitting back in a lawn chair and watching some chick with flowers in her hair jump around and try to entertain you, but it’s not completely unwelcome. If anything, you were sort of having fun. The sun had set, making the weather milder. The breeze was warm against your cheeks and the fairy lights strung above were twinkling.   The whole atmosphere lulled you and with your head leaning on Taehyung’s shoulder, every blink became heavier and heavier. “This is nice,” you mutter and he catches it.   Your husband turns his head with a tiny smile. “Yeah?”   “Mhmh...”    You feel a wet kiss being planted at the top of your head and you decide to indulge, closing your eyes for just a moment. But the next time they open, you realize that the crowd has thinned, they’ve put on music on the stereo and Taehyung’s windbreaker is draped on top of you as a makeshift blanket.   “Hey there, sleepy head.” He grins at you when he notices your lashes fluttering. “Want me to carry you back to the yurt?”   “I’m fine.” It takes a second to get up and you stretch your arms out before the both of you make your way back to the yurt. There were a few younger couples lingering around and still taking in the scenery, but the years were catching up to you quickly and all you wanted was to dive into the sheets and satiate the rest of your sleepiness. “How long was I out for?”   “About half an hour?”   Taehyung fishes for the key and opens the door. “I didn’t even realize I was so tired.” You manage to kick off your shoes and beeline to the bathroom to brush your teeth.   “Of course, you were tired. You didn’t even sleep on the bus and for the past few days you’ve been up late doing research.”   You mumble incoherently, not having enough energy to argue with Taehyung and he grins, nudging you aside so he can grab his own toothbrush.    In the next ten minutes, it’s lights out. You’re rolled onto the bed, tucked into the warm sheets like a burrito, and Taehyung’s settled in as well. You hear his exhale and you allow your muscles to relax in the comfortable darkness. The exhaustion that’s been built from the entire day washes over you. But before you can drift off, in the quietness of the room, you remember.   And you reach out, arm stretched, feeling for your husband.   Taehyung hums when you tap his shoulder. You feel him shift and mumble, “What’s wrong?”   “I’m fertile,” you mutter with your eyes closed. “You need to stick your dick in me.”   He bursts out laughing and his arm slings over your abdomen. “It’s okay if we don’t have sex tonight, you know.”   You sigh, too fatigued to get up and do the job yourself. “We’re gonna miss our opportunity, Tae.”   A soft kiss is pressed to your temple, and you feel yourself losing the fight to keep your consciousness. “We’ll have other chances. Relax.”   “Relaxing….isn't gonna give us a baby.”   “No, but it will keep my current baby sane.”   After being together for so many years, Taehyung knows how to make his words sound sweet and enticing. And before you can even damn him for always catering to you and babying you, you’ve fallen asleep in his arms.

[Day Two]   Breakfast is as incredible as dinner was. There’s a full fruit platter that’s apparently all organic and a number of carbohydrates to fill yourself all the way to lunch. But you begin to regret eating so much with the scheduled activity that follows.   “Couples yoga is a way to build intimacy and trust with your partner.” Hyunjin and Jimin smile brilliantly and you wonder if they’re happy go lucky all the time. It must be fucking exhausting.   “Taehyung.” You nudge the man beside you who’s intently listening and he turns his head. “You know I’m not flexible at all.”   “Don’t worry.” He flashes a blazing grin. It’s way too early for this. “This is just for fun and I’ll catch you if anything.”   “No. Last time I tried doing yoga, I pulled a muscle in my thigh—”   “Oh look. They’re doing the first pose!” Your husband excitedly lugs you down and you’re forced to comply, crossing your legs and facing him.    It’s simple at first. There are basic poses with him leaning against you. Although it is hard to find a good balance considering how tall Taehyung is and even for being lanky, he’s quite a bit stronger than you are. But when Hyunjin and Jimin begin to twist themselves around and Jimin holds her up by the feet with a single hand, you know it’s impossible.   Unlike Taehyung, you never did cheerleading or any acrobatics.   “You’re going to drop me or I’m going to snap your spine, Tae!”   “Don’t you trust me?”   You look at your half-monkey, half-clown of a husband. “Do you really want to know the truth?”   The both of you collapse into a heaping mess before he can confirm or deny. He laughs and starts tickling you for not being able to listen until you’re begging him to stop before you look more like an idiot than you already do.   There’s a few couples who do a good job and you giggle when Taehyung mutters passive aggressive comments on how they’re teacher’s pets or that their form is awful. But there’s the fair share of other pairs who do as bad as you, namely Seokjin and Dahyun, the old couple from last night, bickering at being unable to do any poses.   You can’t say that couple’s yoga is particularly relaxing, but it’s silly and you find yourself having fun.   Hyunjin leads the cool down exercise and Taehyung nearly whacks you in the head with how he stretches. Your glare gains his exaggerated pout then cheesy smile. “Now as the very last cool down exercise, we’re going to take our partners by the hand.”   You mimic her and clasp Taehyung’s hands, awaiting further instructions.    “And we’re going to gaze into their eyes.” What? “Focus into the colour of their irises, how brown or blue or green they might be, or even the pattern of them. Sometimes we don’t truly look at one another like we should.”   “What are they even saying?” you mutter and the corner of Taehyung’s mouth twitches. In spite of how bizarre it is, you follow and stare into Taehyung’s rounded eyes. They’re brown. Like they’ve always been.   But you must admit, when the morning sunlight catches his irises at particular angles, the colour is a lighter shade than usual. They’re quite bright too.   “They say if we gaze into the eyes of someone we love, our heartbeat synchronizes together.”   What? Your brows furrow skeptically and you’re about to turn away, but suddenly Taehyung grabs a hold of your chin. “Don’t look away,” he commands with an authoritative voice and you swallow hard.   “Okay.” You focus your eyes to enlarge and focus. “I’m looking.”   You wonder if this is a staring contest, but even with his wolfish smile and being married for so long, Taehyung’s intent stare starts to make you feel vulnerable. You wonder if he’s always looked at you so affectionately. More importantly, you realize that even with all his dumb antics — like deciding to paint the fence green and then stopping halfway or ripping out the cabinets in the kitchen and never replacing them like he intended — you still love this sweet and kind dummy.   “Alright. Everyone can relax now,” Jimin announces softly as he claps and you finally blink a few times, eyes stinging from how you forced them open. “That’s the end of this session. Thank you for joining everyone.”   Yet, Taehyung holds your gaze a moment longer. And before you can pipe up and tell him it’s over, the man leans in and presses a soft kiss to your lips. He smiles when he pulls away. “As much as sweat is a good look on you, I think it’s time to shower, Mrs. Kim.”   You scoff and he holds your hand with an enormous grin, dragging you back to the yurt.   The two of you hop into the shower together, a habit that Taehyung insists is to save water for the good of the environment, but you swear half the time, you end up wasting more than if either of you do it separately. You’re sure that right now is one of those times.   “Hey.” You turn around as he’s lathering up his shampoo.   “Hey, yourself.” He smiles and shifts towards the stream of water before screaming at how hot it is. Taehyung quickly adjusts it, dissipating the fog on the glass. “Why do you like bathing in molten lava, woman?”   “You always make it too cold.” You scoff, but don’t dwell on the argument as you lean into his backside. “Listen, should we get a quickie in?”   Taehyung frees himself of the soap and looks at you. “If we do, we’ll miss lunch and then the hike.”   “We’re going on a hike?!”   “Yep, so hurry up cause if we don’t get lunch, we’re not gonna make it!” He gets out of the shower, leaving you to be bludgeoned by the ice, cold water. You sigh in exasperation.   The purpose of coming here is to conceive, not go on a hike. But with how enthused he is, you begrudgingly join.   Afternoons are the worst out here. The sun is sweltering and there isn’t an ounce of a breeze or a wind. As a result, the heat stifles and lingers without dissipating, causing sweat to dampen your clothing and stick to the back of your neck. The weather exhausts you and you feel your creamy lunch pasta up your throat again as you lug your legs up the steep, rocky incline.    No matter how much you try to keep up, you fall behind from the group.   Taehyung twirls around with a big grin, mouth perfectly symmetrically. “Are you okay?”   “W-What does it look like?” you pant. It’s unfair that Taehyung works out once a year and treats his body like a candy trashcan but is still more fit than you are.    “I can carry you if you want.”   “You’re going to snap in half carrying me.” You pass him as he laughs.    You hear him catch up, feet skipping along like he’s playing hopscotch. Then suddenly, you feel yourself being lifted off the ground and you shriek, arms looping around Taehyung’s neck. You’re scooped up in his arms like he’s about to kick down the door into the bedroom, but instead, he starts sprinting up the path like a maniac.   “Taehyung!” you squeal and he laughs again.   “Isn’t this better?”   “Aren’t you tired?”   “If I say yes, you’re gonna think I’m trying to tell you to lose weight, but for the record, I like how soft you are.”   You roll your eyes, embarrassed as you pass a few couples, but none of them seem to find it bizarre and they even smile warmly at you and Taehyung. Yet, he starts to slow down tremendously after a few minutes, panting and sweating profusely. You ask him if he’s going to put you down yet, but you underestimate just how stubborn your dear husband is. Taehyung refuses until you’re up at the top of the trail, making it to where Jimin and Hyunjin are by the waterfall.    There, you’re finally on set on your feet again.   You pass him your water bottle. “Drink it before I’m the one dragging you down.”   He grins and downs it.   Up here, it’s much more refreshing and easier to breathe. There’s a tiny waterfall coming from the higher mountains and there are trees around to provide shade. When you squint, you can see the campsite at a distance with all the yurts.   “We should take some pictures!” Taehyung declares when he steadies his breath and pulls out his selfie stick from the hideous fanny pack that you still won’t admit is pretty convenient.   “Your mom is gonna want a copy so don’t pull any ugly faces, Tae.”   “My face is never ugly.” He tugs you beside him and snaps a few shots before reviewing them carefully. Taehyung always had an eye for these kinds of things. “We didn’t get a good angle of the water.”   “I can take it for you.”   “What’s the point if we’re not together?” His thick brows are furrowed, lips lopsided, sighing.   A matronly and friendly voice pipes up next to you, “Do you need any help?”   Dahyun is smiling with Seokjin beside her and Taehyung appears relieved. “Yes, please.”   She takes his phone as he folds back his selfie stick and she stands off to the side, capturing you and Taehyung smiling with his arm around you. “One. Two. Three. I’ll take another one.”   Dahyun changes the angle a bit and Taehyung leans over to pull on your cheek while you feign a glare at him. The second picture is taken while the woman and her husband laugh, endeared. “There we go. You can check them to see if they’re good.”   The phone is handed back and by Taehyung’s expression, it seems acceptable. “You two are too cute. When did you get married?”   “Oh, I think three years ago? Yeah. Three.”    It’s much longer than it actually feels. It seemed like it was a week ago when you first met in class and thought he was annoying. Like yesterday, he was supposed to propose at a fancy restaurant but failed when you found the ring box the night before — how he screamed at you to stop, but it was too late and he ended up going with it. They’ve all become memories that you cherish.   “We met back in school and dated a while before getting married.”   Dahyun smiles. “Have you decided how many kids you want yet?”   You hitch a thumb to Taehyung. “He wants four, but I’m fine with two.”   “The bigger the family, the better, right?” he says, looking up from the screen of his phone.   “Wait until you have kids, you’ll end up wanting more,” Seokjin chuckles, “That or you’ll want to give them all away, but personally, I could raise a whole football team if she’d let me.”   His wife jabs him in the ribs. “Yeah, because you’re not the one who has to give birth to them.”   “And that’s why you’re the boss of the house.” He pouts at her while the corners of his mouth tickle up into a smile, and she relents.   “Let’s be honest, the real boss of the house is our little troublemaker. I swear he took after all your bad traits.”   Seokjin gasps. “Excuse me, Youngjae is my most masterful creation...even if he painted all over our leather seats and popped our car tire with his batman toy.”   She shakes her head with a light sigh, but it’s hard to hide her beaming expression. “I should’ve known he would give me trouble when he went past the due date for two weeks.”   “T-two weeks?” you sputter.   Dahyun nods, finally having the sympathy she was trying to fish out of her husband. “My stomach was as big as a watermelon and I was in labour for fourteen hours before I ended up getting an emergency c-section and he came out a whopping ten pounds.”   Your head is swirling as you try to imagine a ten pound baby in this petite woman.   It almost seems like a horror story that’s waiting to be picked up by Hollywood.   “But honestly, the hardest part wasn’t the whole pregnancy or birthing process. It was afterwards.” Her exhale is long and fatigued. “Suddenly there’s another human being you’re responsible for and you have to take care of them while you’re still in recovery. I remember when Youngjae couldn’t stop crying in the middle of the night. I always had an idea that having kids was a lot of work, but you really don’t have time for yourself once they’re born, and not to mention my bladder was completely done for after the whole thing.”   “Alright, alright.” Her husband pulls her close. “I already know you’re a woman warrior. I saw it with my own eyes.”   Dahyun smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes and she turns to him, deadpanning, “No, you didn’t. You passed out half-way.”   “I was there in spirit,” Seokjin insists humorously.   Dahyun scoffs while Taehyung grins at their back and forth that’s reminiscent of his own dynamic with you. “But were they worth it?”   “Oh, a thousand percent,” Dahyun responds without needing a second to consider, expression softening. “Enough that I would want to do it all over again.”   She doesn’t get a chance to say much else when Jimin’s voice pierces through the chatter and everyone gathers together with the last stragglers who have finally made it up. “Thank you, everyone, for coming all the way up here. This is Serenity Falls that was actually…”   But his voice drowns out.   You linger on what Dahyun said, about child rearing and birthing, and there’s nothing that can be done to the uneasy emotion swelling inside of you.   The walk back down is silent. Done without a single complaint from you about the hot weather or how your feet ache. Taehyung notices, glancing at you several times. He doesn’t say anything until you’re back at the yurt.    “What’s wrong?”   You look at him from across the room. “Nothing, why?”   “You’ve just been quiet.”   “I just….” You inhale and decide to divulge him. “I was just thinking about what Dahyun and Seokjin were saying. Do you think we’re cut out for this, Taehyung?”   His head quirks to one side. “Why wouldn’t we be?”   “You and I can barely take care of ourselves.”   “That’s not true.”   “We forget to buy food all the time.”   “That makes midnight snack runs fun.” He grins.   You exhale an unsteady breath and Taehyung approaches you. He doesn’t mind how sweaty you are and wraps his arms around your waist. “We’ll figure it out. You said it yourself, right? One step at a time.”   “But what if it’s too much and you decide you don’t want to do it anymore? Or that...you don’t want to be with me?” He opens his mouth, but you keep going before he can jump in. It’s not just about you being self-conscious or needing reassurance. You’re simply trying to imagine the worst case scenario as realistically as you can. “Like when I’m still bloated like a whale and in a bad mood and the baby’s crying and no one knows what to do.”   “I’ll still love you no matter the changes,” Taehyung murmurs earnestly, searching your expression. “Even if you’re bloated like a whale and in a bad mood and the baby’s crying and no one knows what to do. I’ll use google to figure it out and get the baby to calm down and I’ll get you some chocolate and I’ll rub your feet.”   You scoff lightly. “You make it sound so easy.”   “Maybe because it won’t be as hard as you think. I’m great with kids and we got killer teamwork, you know, plus this baby’ll be the best project we’ve ever done together.”   “A project that’s gonna last us eighteen years.” You smile.   Taehyung laughs, the sound mellifluous in the room. “Which isn’t that long considering how fast time moves.”   You hum and encircle your arms around his neck. Taehyung gets the hint and leans in to seal your lips against his, slotting them together to kiss you the way he knows you like it.   It’s slow, comforting, an opportunity to revel in the softness of his lips. Taehyung gives you courage — he always has and when you break apart, smiling against each other, you feel worlds better than before. “I’m gonna start a bubble bath. You can join me if you want.”   It’s less of a suggestion and more of a demand, one Taehyung fully recognizes and makes him smile in amusement as you saunter away. Taking advantage of the tub in the bathroom, you lower the stopper of the drain and dump in the soap they offer. The water gets filled three quarters way with a layer of bubbles and you strip. You sigh as you get comfortable in the tub.   “Is it warm?”   Your husband leans against the doorway, arms crossed and the corner of his mouth curled.   “Uh-huh.” You loll your head on the edge of the tub and lift up your foot, watching the way the water cascades off your skin. “Are you not going to get in?”   “Maybe later,” Taehyung surprisingly replies. He rarely rejects any chance at jumping your bones when you’re being this forward about it. There’s no hike or lunch to catch that’s preventing him from having fun with you either. But as your husband walks out, you catch him unceremoniously stealing the clothes you have prepared and the stack of towels by the sink.   “What are you doing?”   “There’s no point in covering yourself up if I’m gonna strip you anyway.” He flashes a mischievous grin and you sigh, relenting in his antics. You simply lay back to enjoy the water, muscles relaxing and your brain that’s constantly in overdrive empties.   After ten minutes, your skin begins to wrinkle, so you drain the water and get out. But the moment you stand up, the cool air conditioning slams into you and your body starts to shiver.   “Taehyung!” you shout and hear silence. “At least give me a towel!”   Fortunately for you, there’s a smaller one on the rack he missed so you swipe at it and wrap your shoulders to protect yourself. But you’re still dripping wet and in need of your clothes, so you stomp out to find your ridiculous partner who’s apparently five years old and—   “HA!” Said man you’re searching for bursts out of the closet and you scream, startled half to death, nearly falling to the ground. Taehyung starts to laugh like a maniac.   “Are you serious?!” You gawk at him. “How long did you even wait there for?”   “Like five minutes ago.” The bastard wolfishly grins. “Worth it though.”   You cock a brow at him, sighing. “So that’s why you didn’t join me in the bath?”   “No. I didn’t join you, so I could do this.” He yanks the towel where your breasts meet, leaving you nude. Goosebumps rise all over your skin and your nipples harden in the frigid air.   You screech, arms trying to cover yourself. “Taehyung, it’s cold!” “I can warm you up,” he says but then runs away when he reads the glare on your face, giggling boyishly. It’s completely childish. If anyone was watching, you’d be mortified, but it’s been a long time since there was any shame in your marriage, so you stomp after him while nude.    You hunt the man down while he tries to evade by rounding the coffee table. It’s no longer about grabbing clothes or covering yourself up, it’s time for revenge.   Luckily, the yurt isn’t big enough to have a game of tag. You manage to reach him and you steal the opportunity to yank his pants down. Taehyung, mid-laugh, trips on his feet and stumbles on the carpet. You burst out giggles, looking at his ass in the air and he giggles too from the infectious sound bubbling up your throat.   “Oh, you’re gonna get it now,” He mutters in a low voice with half-lidded eyes and you scramble away with another shriek.   “You started it!” You jump onto the bed and Taehyung kicks off his pants. You don’t ask why he’s skipped out on wearing boxers, but you notice he’s already half-hard and that only makes you laugh louder.   He chases after you as you duck and steal his own tactic of rounding the coffee table. But unfortunately for you, Taehyung has always been destined to win with his longer legs. He catches you within two strides and snatches you as you scream. You’re thrown over his shoulder like you’re a sack of potatoes and he smirks. “Caught you.”   “Taehyung! People are gonna hear!” You laugh in spite of being the one who’s making most of the noise and he tosses you onto the bed. Usually, you hate to be manhandled, but your husband’s the only exception to the rule.   “Let them hear.”   He hovers over you and the laughter dies down. Taehyung stares earnestly into your eyes and your breathing becomes shallow. But you don’t like to lose and as his wife of three years, you know his one, true weakness.    Your fingers lift to Taehyung’s armpits and he seizes when you start tickling him. You laugh when he does and once he doubles over, there’s an opening to the left, a perfect escape route. You steal the opportunity while you still have it and start to climb off the bed, but he regains his breath and grabs your ankle, tugging you back to him in one swift motion without even needing to try.    Taehyung grins. “God, you’re such a brat sometimes.”    “Yeah, and I know you like it.”   He grabs your wrists before you can make another tickle attack and pins it above your head. You can tell that there’s no more time for jokes or any more playing around, not when you can feel his hard cock against your stomach.   “You smell good,” he sighs into your neck, inhaling deeply. “Cherry blossom? Peony?”   “Strawberries,” you answer. “You smell like sweat.”   “You’re gonna end up like me anyway.” Taehyung smiles and leans in to kiss you. It isn’t shy or chaste. His tongue licks into your mouth and you exhale, a strangled moan muffled against his lips as you melt against him. He finally has you where he wants and you let him take control.   The pair of you swap spit for a few minutes until he releases your hands, allowing you to curl your fingers into his shoulders as he caresses your waist.    Taehyung eventually breaks away with a playful glint in his eyes. “You wanna try the toys?”   You both look at the basket half across the room and he rolls off of you. You get to your feet to inspect it for yourself and discover an array of colourful gadgets, some that you’ve tried before and others that you’re sure needs to have an instruction manual with it.    “I’m not putting any of these dildos in me, Tae. I don’t know where they’ve been.”   “I know.” He lays with his head propped up by his hand and you eye something at the bottom of the basket. You pull out a leather whip and look at him. “Ooh, a classic pick there, sweetheart.”   A whip seems more sanitary considering it doesn’t have to go in anyone’s orifices.   “Is it?” You approach with a tiny smile, staring down the innocent man. “Roll over.”   “What?”   “I’ll whip you.” You grin and he blinks at you. More often than not, you’re the more submissive one in bed, but the idea of having Taehyung crying out and the idea of you cackling at his pain has him immediately rolling face down in intrigue and you stepping up on the bed.   He turns his face to the side. “Do you know how to do it?”   “How hard can it be?” There’s a pause. “But tell me if it hurts.”   “The point is to make it hurt, Y/N.”   “Yeah, but I don’t want to hurt you-hurt you.”   “I can handle it.” Taehyung smirks and you scoff.    Even in this position, he’s trying to maintain his dominance.   You grip it tightly and don’t count. Simply, with a flick your wrist, you slam the whip across his backside. It makes a loud cracking sound and you hear Taehyung sharply inhale. His teeth grit and you freeze, watching his expression carefully.   “How was it?”   “Is my back split open?” he asks, trying to look over his shoulder.   “No.”   “I think I might have to go to the ER.” He sits up completely, overdramatic in the way he fumbles around and his tone filled with some mischief. “I think there’s internal bleeding. Or my spine is broken. I wouldn’t be surprised.”   “It’s fine, Tae.” you laugh. So much for telling you to go for it. But you already had an inkling Taehyung wasn’t one for receiving pain. After all, he’s still your whiny baby who only eats vanilla yogurt. “Not your thing?”   “Not my thing.” He takes the whip from your hand and tosses it across the room. “I have a better toy in mind.”   You’re about to remind him you’re not gonna put any of those communal toys inside of you, but he instead walks over to his suitcase and starts tearing some clear packaging open with something pink inside. You read the label — it’s a remote control vibrating egg.   Your brows furrow. “When did you get that?”   “Two days before we left. Amazon prime, babe.”   “So that’s what you were looking at when you told me you were doing some online shopping?”   “Precisely.” Taehyung grins and you’re not sure if you should be pleasantly surprised or in dismay since the two of you have already made a pact not to buy anything else online. The treadmill bought on an impulse is still taking up half the space of the living room.   Before you can think too much, Taehyung gets it open and comes over. He nudges your thighs to open and you lay back, leaning against the headboard. You’re not that wet yet, if at all, but it doesn’t stay that way when his long fingers rub against your clit in circles.    With his other hand, he strokes against your slit and then sinks his index finger in knuckle deep. You throw back your head, moaning his name at the intrusion while he remains silent, intently watching your pink cunt squeeze. Taehyung curls his finger and swallows hard. The sloppy sounds of your cunt fill the room and he hums in satisfaction.   “Okay. Ready?”   “Uh-huh.”   The head of the cold egg meets your folds and it slowly enters. While the toy might not be big or long, the girth stretches against your warm walls and you keen. Taehyung makes a low noise, encouraging you to take it. When it’s in, he smiles brilliantly. “Good job, sweetheart. You did it.”   “Now what?”   “This, of course.” Taehyung dangles the remote in front of you and then like a psycho, he ramps it up to the highest possible setting. Intense vibrations are felt through your body instantaneously and you cry, head knocked back against the headboard as your velvet walls squeeze and tremble.   “T-Taehyung!”   “Good?”   “I-It’s too much!” You’re completely at his mercy and he takes advantage of it, drinking you in with a wolfish smile. You’re unable to muster a glare at him, reduced to a complete mess while your center leaks and drips onto the sheet. Still, you try to reach over to the remote.   He dodges when you lunge at him. “Nu-uh.”   Luckily, you get a hold of your husband and climb over to him. His arm is extended straight up, laughing as you try to snatch it from him. He waves it inches away to mock you while enjoying the sight of you quivering on top of him. “T-Tae!”   “Okay, okay.” He laughs and transfers it into his other hand, about to turn the setting down a notch. But right at the moment you’re about to snag it for yourself, the remote flies out of his hand. It falls through the gap between the wall and the headboard.   It clatters to the ground.   “Oh shit.”   “Taehyung!”   “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He rolls off the mattress and looks underneath the bed before abruptly standing. “I’m going to need a long stick or something.”   He starts to look around the room, searching for a tool to grab the remote that’s out of reach, and you don’t know if you should suffocate him with a pillow or facepalm yourself hard enough to get knocked out into a coma.   You can pull out the egg yourself, but the violent vibrations were beginning to thrum pleasure through you, so as your useless husband goes fishing for the remote, you finish the job. Your fingers play with your clit, rubbing the bud as your slick drips down your thighs and you come hard on the toy.   The same moment light flashes beneath your eyelids and your toes curl, Taehyung grabs the remote with the help of a rolled brochure and shuts it off. The both of you are winded for different reasons.   “You know, I'd say that was pretty hot if not for how stressful that actually was.”   “You’re an idiot.” You tug the toy out of you and bat him over lazily, feeling spent on how hard you came. “Now dump some sperm in me, idiot.”   Taehyung has a cheesy grin and climbs over you. Despite the struggles of grabbing the toy’s remote, he’s fully hard from the noises you were making. “I’d tell you to ask more nicely, but I’ll let it go.”   He aligns the head of his weeping cock to your swollen cunt and leans his weight into you. He starts to push in and you whine, gripping his forearms. As wet as you are, Taehyung is still well-endowed — less girthy than the toy, but there’s a considerable length to him.    When he bottoms out, you can feel him all the way to your throat.   He tucks sweaty strands of hair behind your ear and kisses you. “Sorry about earlier.”   “’t’s okay. It was fun,” you admit and he smiles, starting to work up a good rhythm. You feel hot in your face with the pressure of his body on top of yours, hardened nipples brushing against his chest. Your cunt pulses and squeezes around his length. It draws Taehyung’s groans into your neck.   “F-Fuck. You’re so tight.”   It feels good and you know he’s reveling in the pleasure too. His eyes are shut tight, the scrunch made between his brows and it entices you to reach up and kiss him to which he sweetly indulges you. Your tongues twine as you pant against each other and Taehyung starts to lose his pacing.   He bends your knee, hitting you at a deeper angle as his strokes become increasingly frantic and quick. You egg him on and he groans once more before he thrusts himself as deep as he can go and cums. Ropes of white paint your walls, the head of his cock against your cervix and filling your cunt and womb up. You can feel some of it dribbling out, seeping past your folds and when Taehyung’s about to withdraw, you quickly grab his forearm.   “Wait. Just stay put for a second. I have to keep it in.”   He nods and kisses your lips. “Okay.”   Taehyung nestles into you, nuzzling into your neck and you hope this is the one.

[Day Three]   There were lots of activities and amenities offered and advertised by Jimin during the introduction of the retreat, but you realize you might’ve missed over the most important one of all.   “How does that feel?” the massage therapist asks as she works a knot out of your shoulders and smooths your skin with the oil.   “Amazing,” you murmur from the corner of your mouth, melted against the table.    Couples massages were something you always scoffed at, but holy shit, it’s absolutely paradise. With the breeze blowing through the pitched tent and the glowing humidifier releasing a fresh scent, you’ve never been more relaxed as all the stiffness is worked out of you.   You open your eyes to see Taehyung enjoying it as well — though not as much as you are since he’s quite ticklish. Sometimes, he squirms a bit too much and his massage therapist is at a loss of what to do.   But when it’s all done, you feel like you’re in a new body. “Oh my god. I think I’m more flexible than before. Look, Tae!”   You stretch your leg and he giggles at how happy your mood is. “If I knew you liked it this much, I would’ve signed us up for one at the spy near the gym.”   Your eyes are wide, catching the sunlight. “Do you think they’re as good as this place?”   Taehyung grins. “Probably.”   “We should go when we get back then. Oh, do you wanna check out the library?”   “Sure.”   You grab his hand, lacing your fingers together and he smiles to himself.    It’s a free day without many planned activities, giving you both an opportunity to look around the retreat for yourselves and take it easy. And the pair of you take full advantage of the opportunity. Since morning, you were lazing around the yurt and after breakfast and the massages, you decide to lay in one of the hammocks by the trees while Taehyung naps with you.    Said man hasn't seen you this stress free in a while, so he happily indulges you in all your wishes. Even when night falls and you step away from the stage where Hyunjin is performing again to stargaze. It’s an odd activity for you since mosquitoes love to especially swarm around you when given the chance and on numerous occasions, you’ve been a moth landing spot.   But tonight, the breeze is soft and gentle, and you don't feel any tickles on your skin that isn’t Taehyung’s hand grazing against yours. The grass is pliant beneath your feet and the fairy lights twinkle far away enough that its luminescence doesn’t obstruct. You knock your heads back to view the horizon, allowing the darkness to engulf you and the stars to emerge.   “Remember Bali?”   “When you lost your passport?”   “When we went stargazing with the tour group,” Taehyung corrects. “It still wasn’t as beautiful as this.”   “You think everything in front of you is the most beautiful thing you’ve seen. You said that about the Eiffel and then Tokyo Tower.”   He laughs. “Hey, my mind doesn’t change that often. You’re still the most beautiful thing I’ve seen.”   You scoff, looking away from the sky towards him with a pout. He always knows how to lay on the sappiness without needing to blink. Your dear husband has always been shameless in that aspect and you adore him for it. “So I’m a thing to you now?”   “You know that’s not what I mean.” He wraps his arms around your waist. The both of you stare up at the sky. “Is that the big dipper?”   You look at where he’s pointing to the large clusters of stars. “I can’t see it. Maybe that’s scorpio.”   “Nah, I don’t think so.” Taehyung tries guessing, “It might be taurus or gemini. Or libra.”   “Aren’t you just naming astrological signs now?”   “Maybe.” He grins. “I’m a capricorn.”   “Yes, I know.” You two of you clearly don’t know anything about constellations or how to find them, but it doesn’t make the moment any less enjoyable. Yet when your necks start to ache, he takes your hand and strolls down the path through the trees. “Taehyung. What if we get lost?”   None of you have your phones or any flashlights. There’s only the crescent moon giving off its light. “Don’t worry. I have a great sense of direction.”   “You and I both know that’s not true.”   “You have a great sense of direction, so we won’t get lost,” he says and you sigh without putting much of an argument up. Not when you knew he was headed to the lake you had peeked at earlier in the afternoon, and now it was shimmering with the moonlight, reflecting the starry horizon in its water.   There’s a certain kind of peacefulness, a serenity that you would never get back in the city or even the suburbs. Certainly not without light pollution or the occasional car whizzing past. Here, there is none of those noises, none of those distractions, just you and Taehyung savouring the view⁠—   “Hey.” But of course, your mischievous husband has to have ulterior motives for coming all the way here. And you know there are ulterior motives by that glint in his eye and the sly smile he has.   “What?”    “Wanna take a dip?”   Your brows shoot to your hairline. “Are you crazy? It’s probably freezing! What if we get hypothermia and die?”   “For the record, you’d make one beautiful angel. But I’ll warm you up before it gets to that point.” Taehyung grins and starts stripping, tugging his shirt right off his head. It’s always been like this — him proposing something out of your norm, you try to voice your concerns, and then you’re the one who’s diving head first into it without hesitation and end up having more fun than he does.   “God, it’s so cold!”    The moment the water touches your toes, you recoil. But you brace yourself and continue onward with your entire body shivering. It’s your first time skinny dipping ⁠— something normally reserved for rebellious teenagers and most certainly not for late twenty-some year olds. Yet neither of you have qualms, even if you’re shrieking and Taehyung is laughing and following behind you.   “It’s freezing, Taehyung!”   “Come here.” He pulls you to him so your backside is pressed to his front and you wonder how Taehyung can be so warm all the time. The pair of you get waist deep into it and you turn around to grip him. Your husband smiles and holds onto you, eventually going far enough that the water reaches your shoulders. “See? Isn’t this nice?”   You hum, gazing up at the stars and the moon, the sight reflected on the water and how you’re pressed to Taehyung. “Seems like the beginning of a horror movie.” He laughs and your feet try to reach down to find stability, but you realize you can’t touch the ground anymore and your grip on him tightens. “Walk back a bit, Tae.”   “Why?”   “You know I can’t swim.”   His mouth curls. “But I like how you’re holding onto me. I won’t let go,” he adds after a long pause, “if you beg me not to.”   Your arms immediately come to loop around his neck and your legs wrap around his waist, latching onto him in a vice grip like a koala does to a branch. “Taehyung! I’m not kidding.”   “Oh...oh!” The bastard pretends that he’s gonna let go of you and actually does for a split-second. He laughs at your panicked expression. “I’m kidding! I’m kidding!”   You feign a pointed glare that turns out to be more of a pout. “You’re lucky I like you.”   “You only like me?”   “Yeah and if you keep going, I’m going to demote you from husband to friend.”   Taehyung makes a pained, sharp sound. “Can’t let that happen then.” He suddenly hoists you up higher, grip secure on your thighs and smiles brilliantly while you scoff.   You savour the view and the warmth of his body heat, but you’re slightly distracted. “Do you think anyone’s gonna steal our clothes, Tae?” You squint at the small pile near the shore.   “Who would?”   “I don’t know. What if a bear comes from the bushes and takes them? We’ll have to walk back naked.”   “I’m pretty sure there aren’t bears here, Y/N. Stop overthinking it.” Taehyung suddenly grabs a hold of your chin and turns your head for you to look only at him. Then, he kisses you in a soft and gentle way before the tip of his tongue meets the seam of your lips. You happily oblige, parting them and allowing him access to your tongue and giving him a taste of you.   The man hums in satisfaction as soft smacking noises fill the surroundings. You lean into his firm frame while Taehyung’s large hands slinks from your thigh to the curve of your ass. You feel his thumb probe against your folds.   “T-Taehyung.” His hard length is beneath you and you grind down on him, feeling empty. It draws a groan from his throat.   After a moment, you get his cock inside of you. The stretch soothes the itch you had, filling your cunt deliciously. But unlike the movies, it’s not enough for you. The water washes away the lubricant, each stroke rough and the glide slower than you’d like. So you beg him and the both of you are dragged up onto the shore again.   You turn on all fours. The pebbles uncomfortably dig into your knees, but it’s a distraction that blurs into the background when Taehyung pounds into you. You feel all of him, his body heat against yours, each thrusting movement flicking off the droplets of water from your skin. And when Taehyung turns your head to kiss you while rubbing at your clit, you cum around his cock.   He finishes as you beg for it and Taehyung’s sticky fluids leak down your thighs on the trek back.

[Day Four]   Taehyung blinks blearily, slowly coming to consciousness. He scratches his bed head and groans at how his muscles ache. But when he turns his head, the other side of the bed is cold and empty. His eyes widen in confusion and he feels more awake than before. �� He checks the time and realizes he slept in, a total of ten hours, which isn’t a surprise considering how last night’s rendezvous continued and was more intense than usual. What is unusually, however, is that you’re gone.   But he soon finds you outside. Bathing in the sun. Laying in a hammock. Napping with a book next to you.   Your eyes flutter open as his shadow covers your figure. The corner of his mouth pulls.   “Morning.”   You sheepishly grin. “Morning.”    “What time did you get up?”   “Like an hour ago. The breeze was nice so I thought I’d do some reading, but I guess I accidentally fell asleep.”   “Looks like you’ve gotten comfortable.” Taehyung’s enormous smile aches his cheeks. You’ve fallen in love with this place more than he has, but he doesn’t mind whatsoever. He loves watching you have fun.   The two of you have breakfast, inhaling in the food, and then head to a meditation class on the grass led by Hyunjin. Typically, Taehyung has to convince you to take part in such a session and you’d usually wave it off as a waste of time. But there are no qualms or an ounce of hesitation in your expression when you head over.   “Now breathe in, and out, a steady stream of breath. Think about all that you are grateful for. Everything that has made your life amazing, and let that positive energy surround you as the negative energy releases.”   But while you’re eager, Taehyung, on the other hand, finds out that meditation is not cut out for him. He’s bored out of his mind from the lack of stimulation. Time feels like it’s dragging on slower, each second a minute and a minute is an hour. Somehow, meditating makes him feel even more exhausted than before and his mind ends up wandering.   Taehyung thinks about how he’s really craving some fatty burgers instead of the organic oatmeal and yogurt he had — how hot the weather is — how it’s hard to breathe — how sweat sticks to his skin.   “Hold your breath for three seconds and release for three seconds.”   He sighs and peels back an eye to see you with your hands pressed together, concentrated in following instructions. The corner of his mouth tickles into a smile.   As bored as he is, it’s worth seeing you happy.   //   The more excited you are about something, the more you run around from place to place and Taehyung’s resorted to looking for you. Luckily, the resort is small, so he finds you in front of the main building, chatting to a certain brunette with a half-moon smile and chubby cheeks.   “—heard that doggy actually works for some people, but for me, it doesn’t feel right...like…”   “The head of the cock isn’t right up against the cervix?” Jimin hums thoughtfully. “Have you tried angling your leg better? Sometimes you need to bend a bit and he needs to be leaning towards the side rather than just hovering straight on top.”   What.   Taehyung’s brows lift and he quickly approaches. Your face lights up when you see him. “Oh, hey.”   “I was looking for you.” Taehyung throws his arm over your shoulder and subtly tugs you into his chest. He looks at the other man, eyes narrowed in on him which he doesn’t seem to notice.   “Sorry, I was just caught up with Jimin.”   “What were you talking about?”   “What position is best for conception.” You blink innocently like it’s not a big deal you’re exploiting the details about your sex lives to another guy, and while he’s not embarrassed whatsoever, it was a bit too much information being shared for Taehyung’s liking. “Turns out elevating the hips might not help as much as we thought it does.”   “Huh.” Taehyung deadpans, “That’s interesting.”   “I know, right?” Your expression is bright, oblivious to his turmoil. At the same time, Hyunjin exits from the building in yet another flower crown and flowy skirt. She smiles at the both of you and joins Jimin’s side, planting a sweet kiss on his cheek and holding his hand.   “Hope I wasn’t interrupting anything important.”   You smile at her. “No, it’s okay.”   The woman nods and looks to her partner while her voice drops into a more private tone. “Just wanted to let you know that Taehoon and I are done.”   As if to validate her words, a timid yet tall man exits the building and they wave goodbye to one another before he walks off towards the parking lot. Jimin smiles. “Did you have fun?”   “Yeah. It was nice.”   Both you and Taehyung exchange expressions. He wonders if you’re thinking what he is or if he’s understanding the insinuations correctly.    As if they catch the inquisitive looks on your faces, they smile in a relaxed way. There’s no need to explain anything to either of you when you’re strangers, but they’re open enough and Hyunjin says, “Taehoon’s my second partner.”   “Second...partner?”    “Hyunjin and I are in an open relationship,” Jimin clarifies in a friendly manner. “It’s not really traditional, but it works well for us.”   “Oh.” Taehyung and you wordlessly bob your heads. He’s pretty sure they mentioned it during their introduction but it slipped his mind. They must get asked a lot of questions too since Hyunjin answers what he’s thinking, telling the both of you there’s not a lot of jealousy involved since they trust each other wholeheartedly and communicate a lot. And rather than finding it bizarre, you’re left intrigued. Taehyung notices as you walk away.   “Do you want an open relationship too?”   “You know it would never work for us.” You lean over, hugging his arm. “I’m too possessive for that.”   He laughs. “Then what about talking to Jimin about our sex positions?”   “He’s a professional.” You shrug. “I thought I could get helpful advice. Why?”   “Nothing, it’s just kind of weird.”    Jimin doesn’t look like a professional. He looks like just some dude in khaki shorts and a white shirt, obnoxiously bulging biceps, probably has rock hard abs, and he’s in an open relationship and clearly doesn’t mind chatting up you, aka Taehyung’s wife.   “Are you jealous?”   “What? No.” Taehyung scoffs, suddenly defensive and you give him that look like you know him better than that. “I just don’t think we don’t need to ask for help yet, and at least not about our positions. We’re gonna have a baby one way or another, Y/N. We just have to be patient.”   “Tell that to my dying eggs.” You walk off and Taehyung grins.   “My sperm’s strong enough that it’ll rescue your dying eggs.”   //   Evening eventually comes and you try to revel in the surrounding sights, the atmosphere of the entire place and the very cozy yurt you’ve grown to adore. It’s sad knowing that tomorrow you’ll have to depart from the resort. You regret not coming here with a more open mind. That way, you could’ve enjoyed and embraced this place much sooner.   “Actually, I’m kind of glad. I’m getting sick of them serving the same food.”   You’re shocked at your husband’s apathy. “But it’s antioxidant-rich—”   “I just want some fried chicken or a burger.”   You scoff. “That’s why the doctor told you to lower your blood sugar and you’re not even over forty yet.” But still, you’re taken aback that he’s not in love with the resort. “Out of everyone, I thought this would’ve been your haven. I was expecting you to beg me to build a cabin here or something to stay.”   Taehyung hums, leaning back into the chair. “I’m not saying the resort is bad. As long as I get to spend time with you, I like it. And I like that you like it.”   “Psh.” He always knows how to say the right thing, especially when he’s doing it absentmindedly and not trying to get something out of you. You lean over, hand lifting to squeeze his cheeks together and you turn his head to kiss him. Taehyung smiles at the soft and affectionate gesture. But you look at him with half-lidded eyes that mean more. “Wanna ditch?”   It’s the final celebration that Jimin and Hyunjin are happily hosting, but you don’t mind leaving for some more quality time with Taehyung, and he happily agrees.   The both of you sneak out of the crowd, stumbling back into the yurt, giggly and giddy like you’re still teenagers trying to be stealthy at midnight. Taehyung kisses you silly and soon, your back is hitting the mattress. He almost rips your dress with how hastily he tries to tear it off your head and you’re stuck for a moment until you manage to get it off.   But in spite of how childish your antics are or how Taehyung blows raspberries on your tummy, each one of his touches is intimate and loving. He holds your hips down and eats you out until you cum twice. Then you’re flipped onto your stomach with him on top of you — his cock is dug into your pussy, every draw and thrust delicious. Your walls pulse along his length and you moan his name and clutch the sheets with tight fists.   You relish in the pressure of his body pressed on top of yours as he pounds into you. It only takes a few minutes before he’s releasing into your womb, cumming hard enough that you feel it too.   He rolls off of you, spent, but you gather your energy and hold him down for a second round.   You’re a woman on a mission and you’re going to make sure you leave this resort with Kim Taehyung’s baby inside of you.

[Day Five]   The final day of the resort has arrived much to your dismay, and you feel sad enough to cry.   “Thank you so much for all you’ve done.”   “It’s our pleasure.” Hyunjin grins, her arms wrapped around Jimin’s. “We just hope you had a great time at our resort.”   “Yes, I really loved it.”   “Our doors are always open,” Jimin affirms. “If nothing’s stuck, you can always come back or if you’re ever looking for more siblings for the little one, you can come again too. We’re happy to welcome anyone that’s family back.”   You’re moved by their words and much to Taehyung’s dismay, you give a brief embrace to each of them. You also manage to see the newlywed couple, Hoseok and Rose, who are still smiling and somehow look even more in-love than when they arrived. Dahyun and Seokjin, as well, wish you luck on your adventures.    “We might be coming back real soon.” The woman sighs, hitching her thumb over her shoulder. “That husband of mine is planning to book another trip next month.”   “So soon?”   Dahyun nods with a long exhale. “I think he’s hoping I’m not pregnant so we can come here again.” Your laugh spurs on her own and you’re able to resonate with the hopelessness of husbands.   Everyone is boarding the same bus, but this is the last opportunity to gather when people are getting dropped off from different places. So you make sure to savour the moment, get your last goodbyes in, and Taehyung pulls out his phone to snap several pictures of you for keepsakes.   Then, the two of you board the bus with your luggage and settle in your seats.   “You know,” you pipe up and Taehyung turns to you. “Even if we didn’t conceive, it was still fun.”   He smiles while taking his hand. “Yeah? I’m glad.” Taehyung laces his fingers with yours and you lean your head on his shoulder as he, too, leans his head on top of yours.   The bus pulls out of the lot and onto the road. Jimin and Hyunjin wave with brilliant grins, and together, you and Taehyung watch the little resort become a particle in the distance.

[Epilogue]   This is terrible. Unexpected and spontaneous.   “I have bad news.” You’re leaning against the door frame of Taehyung’s office and at your tone of voice, your husband looks away from the computer screen with wide eyes.   “Are you divorcing me?”   “No.”   “Did you lose your job?”   “No.”   His entire body deflates in a sigh of relief and he leans back, hands grasping the armrests of his swivel chair. “Thank god because I just bought those new shake weights that were shown on TV.”   “Yea— wait. What?”   Taehyung’s bubbling laughter comes from his chest. “What is it?”   He doesn’t notice the stick in your hand, so you throw it at him. Luckily, Taehyung’s reflexes are still in good shape and he claps his hands together, catching the stick before it hits his head. But then his brows furrow in confusion.   “You’re probably going to need to wash your hands after that. I peed on it.”   He doesn’t answer. Your oblivious husband instead takes a long second to inspect the stick and his pupils dilate. He finally realizes what it is and looks carefully. In the meanwhile, you hitch your breath, feeling unsettled. But then the most enormous smile stretches into his cheeks.    It almost looks like his smile is about to break his face.   “You’re pregnant,” Taehyung murmurs.   “I sure am.”   He looks at you. And then the stick. Then he looks at you again. Taehyung searches your expression in alarm as your words echo back to him. “Why is this bad news? D-did you change your mind? Do you not want kids?”   You shake your head. “No. This is fantastic news. I just wanted an excuse to go to the retreat again.”   He laughs and exhales a long breath. Taehyung scoots his chair over using the heels of his feet and comes to you. He throws his arms around your torso in a secure embrace while his ear is pressed gently to the flat plane of your stomach that’ll soon swell in the coming months. “God, you’re going to be the death of me, woman.”   Taehyung’s brown eyes are lit with mirth and you ease into his hug as your fingers comb through his dark locks. Finally, you’re going to be parents. After waiting and hoping for so long, it was now on the horizon. There’s a sense of fear in you both, but you’re overwhelmed with euphoria and excitement.   “We can always go back for the next kid.”   “I haven’t even had this one yet and you’re already thinking of another.”   “I can’t help it.” Taehyung grins, looking up at you and you lean down to kiss his smile.   You have a feeling this baby’s going to be loved beyond belief.

[sugiwa]

small dreams

It took one 27 second long video for Keigo to fall in love

The video looped through every news cycle, and each reaction varied from outright derision to almost mythical awe emerging. On YouTube, it was viral in fifty-three different countries and Starburst—a name derived from a candy company that the pro-hero was fond of—jokingly tweeted that she was more famous than All-Might.

And she might have been thanks to the reporter that not only caught her decking the father of a girl she just saved but also recorded the subsequent twenty-seven seconds it took for three police officers to pull her off him and pull her away. The peace sign Y/N threw up as the police led her into a car probably didn’t help, nor did the live stream of her twenty-four hours in a holding cell while they investigated her claim of the man’s abuse and finally released her.

Though there were news outlets that tried to pin Starburst down as a hero on the edge of villainy, her public reputation hadn’t taken any damage. It was hard, after all, to claim that she did the wrong thing when they heard the girl’s testimony and pulled her medical records. But, Starburst—or L/N Y/N—still faced punishment from the Hero Public Safety Commission despite all this.

Attacking an unarmed civilian was apparently a big no-no—even if he was an abusive asshole. She was spared having her license revoked until she retested the simple principle that she had refrained from using her quirk. Her sentence was lessened to a month-long suspension with a strict patrol schedule in some city near Tokyo.

Y/N could work with it. She could put up with the Commission’s inane chatter for the sake of her job, but she drew the line at issuing an apology. It took three hours to wiggle her way out of a press conference to address the event. By the time her meeting with the Commission and sentencing was done, Y/N retweeted the initial video with the caption: Totally worth it.

Keigo was slightly in love with Starburst. Maybe it was the way she strolled into the Hero Public Safety Commission building fresh out of handcuffs and bluntly told them that she wasn’t apologizing and would rather become a vigilante than listen to ten more minutes of them debating the future of her career.

Or maybe it was the video which he’d seen a hundred times over, where she looked like a hero. The kind he’d always dreamed of as a kid, the kind who swooped in and beat the bad guy and then offered you stickers and candy and told you everything would be alright because it was exactly what she’d done for that little girl.

Either way, L/N Y/N was a hero who deserved a little rest, which was why he was currently tailing her patrol route and taking care of the problems before she could move. Her quirk was right out of a comic book too. The golden energy that left her capable of issuing an instant KO.

“Will you leave me alone?” she snapped, finally turning around to glare at him. She had a warm face, not made for anger which was probably why the glare fell away a moment later, replaced by a smile. “I appreciate the help, but I’m not offering any fanservice in exchange.”

“Who said I was a fan?” His wings flapped, feathers flying back toward him.

“You regularly stalk girls mid-air? That sort of thing does not fly with me.” Y/N laughed, nose scrunching at her own joke. “Get it…cause we both fly….”

He smiled innocently, “Thought of that all on your own?”

Y/N groaned, twisting her earring, “Just because I didn’t go to a fancy-ass hero school like Wet Jeanist and Flameo Hotman doesn’t mean I’m dumb.”

Slight insulted by the nickname she gave his favorite hero, he asked, “Flameo Hotman? You mean Endeavor-san?”

“Ohhh, that’s a man-crush voice.” Her eyes tightened with mischief, “I’m gonna have to dip since I got a hot date with my credit card. See you later, Chicken Little.”

He watched her go in slight awe because Y/N really was as crazy as the stories said. Starburst was a hero that had a bit of a cult following. She wasn’t high enough in the rankings to be wildly popular the way he was—up until she went viral, that was. A graduate of Ketsubutsu who went on to attend college before actually becoming a hero, she was on a watch list with the Hero Public Safety Commission.

Apparently, non-conformity was an issue…who knew.

A rain of confetti fell over Keigo’s head, brightly colored and all covered in specks of glitter. He inhaled deeply, turning to see Starburst’s grinning face as she eagerly clapped. Endeavor, like always whenever he was forced to be in Starburst’s proximity, turned around and stalked down the hall. Her confetti burned in his wake. Y/N’s voice followed him, offering an empty congratulations to the hero.

“How’s my precious senpai doing?” she asked, turning her attention to him.

“You really know how to annoy him, huh?” asked Keigo staring at the empty hall. If you gave Y/N too much attention, she ran with it. “What’s the deal?”

Y/N shrugged, rolling her shoulders confidently, “Some people are not equipped to handle true talent.”

“Yeah, right,” snorted Keigo.

“I may or may not have drunkenly confessed that I had no idea who he was to a bunch of reporters during last week.” Y/N made a rude gesture with her hand. “I mean, if you’re not Number One, then do you really matter?”

“Harsh,” he ruffled his wings, freeing the last of her glitter confetti and letting it rain on the ground. “You all good with the Commission now?”

“All thanks to you! I owe you one, you know that?”

“Nah,” Keigo waved her off, resisting the urge to laugh as she made her bright eyes as wide as possible. “It was pretty brave of you. Plus, I think anyone would have done the same thing.”

Three months out of trouble, Y/N once again made headlines for ‘accidentally’ dropping a child trafficker off a building. She caught him before he hit the ground, but apparently, the authorities deemed the emotional damage a little extreme.

“They probably would have been a bit smarter about it, though.”

“Well, don’t worry, no one expects you to be the brains.”

Y/N pouted. “True.”

Keigo laughed. “What are you doing here anyway? You’re not in the top ten.”

“Is bullying the new rage these days?” Her pout grew, arms crossing over her chest, “Everyone’s got something snippy to say to me. Where’s Rumi when I need her?”

“Gonna hide behind her?”

“Fuck yeah.” Y/N nodded emphatically as she reached into her pocket for a pack of gum. She offered him a piece. “Let’s see how your chicken wings stand against her legs.”

Keigo looked at the gum and then her. The words slipped out of his mouth before he could stop them, “Wanna get something to eat?”

Her smile looked like the sun, “Thought you’d never ask.”

“So, what’s the deal with you and Dragonbreath?” asked Y/N, sprawling across his couch. It was the third time this week she was here. He should tell her to leave, but the words die in his throat in his mouth every time he tried.

There’s too much risk. Dabi’s listening in on everything he does these days, and he doesn’t want her anywhere near them. Not when he’s aware of what they’re planning. Not when he knows how Y/N would react.

She was rough and improper in everything she does, but there’s no one brighter or better when it came to genuine goodness.

Keigo dodged the question with his own. “Endeavor again?”

“Ran into him last week and got yelled at for ten minutes for getting in his way. The guy was in my path, and I’m the one getting yelled at? Next time, I’m drop-kicking him off his skyscraper.” She kicked her leg in the air, reminding him that she was scarcely dressed.

Was this what having a girlfriend like? Constantly jumping between fondness and horniness? He wasn’t complaining.

He heard this threat a million times. “Still mad about the fact that he has one?”

“I’m a simple country girl. I’d be happy with a peach orchard and some chickens.”

“Come here,” he crooked his finger at her. Y/N got up instantly, crossing the room toward the balcony where he stood. Her hands wrapped around his waist, slipping under his shirt, across his skin, over his chest. Too much and too little at the same time.

“You’ll get cold out here,” she murmured. He could sink in the warmth she offered.

“It’s nice seeing the world so still.”

A noise left her throat, wet and worried, “Hawks, whatever it is, whatever they’re making you do, I’ll be here. I promise.”

People joked about Y/N being dumb—he did it too often to count, but she saw more than most people did when it mattered.

“Why’d you become a hero?”

“Saved a cute boy once, and he gave me a kiss,” she said. He’d heard that story before. She offered it in every interview, never expanding on what boy or how she saved him. It was also a glaring lie.

He didn’t push her. He lied about too many things to count.

Keigo took her face between his hands—the urge to kiss that tiny speck by her eyes thrummed through him. It would take a thousand-thousand years for him to forget her face. Y/N turned, her lips skimming his palm, cold and warm at once.

He loved her because she was Y/N. Because in her, he could love himself and not grow cold from it. Because the numbness he’d always known leaked out in place of affection. He loved her boundlessly—above, below, and across—unhindered, without ill will, without enmity.

It was with her that he was Takami Keigo and not the current Number Two.

His hand cupped her neck, fingers tangling in the curls of her hair. Her lips opened under his. A trail of fire burst across his lips, and for a moment, he only knew the sweetness of her mouth. He drank her in, each breath, each hushed sound leaving her throat.

He would do what they asked and make the choices no one else could.

It was worth the world he dreamed of.

[thisisawonderfulusername]

feelings

klaus hargreeves x reader

requested: anon

prompts: 165- “this might hurt” 291- “is that blood?” 300- “i can take care of myself” and 302- “i can’t breathe”

summary: when trying to save vanya and the world, you get a bit hurt

warnings: cursing, tooth rotting fluff babyyyyy

word count: 2k

a/n: holy shit i uploaded something! anyways, the requestor gave me an option between five and klaus and i had to do klaus because i haven’t written anything for him yet and i want to so baaaad so thank you anon

also @generouswombyrat , yours is next i promise lol

it’s loud, and the flashing lights would have made you pass out if you hadn’t made it to the cover of the counter to protect yourselves while you thought of a plan.

“vanya’s in the room at the end of the hall.” diego has to raise his voice to be heard over what the woman was causing.

allison has her hands on the sides of her head, you assume to block out some of the noise that is threatening to rip your hearing away from you. “how do you propose we get to her?”

“you can count me out.” klaus says from beside you, defeated and with a flask held in his hand. when the two siblings look at him in disbelief, he tries to defend himself, “what? you guys should save her. you’re great at all the hero shit.”

after allison reaches over to slap him, he leans against your shoulder while you roll your eyes. “listen, listen, vanya would understand ‘cause she has realistic expectations of what i am. and what i am, is sexy trash!”

“you’re a big pussy, that’s what you are,” diego tells him in annoyance.

“guys, this is not the time,” you speak over their small argument.

“why, because i don’t want to die? who does?” klaus questions you, waving his hand around in front of you, “and martyrs aren’t around to enjoy the victory party, ‘cause they’re dead!” he ends his sentence with a shout and you roll your eyes.

diego crawls over to where klaus sits, grabbing onto his shirt, “you are going out there,” the other grabs at his arm to push him away, complaining, “or i’m gonna beat you!”

“that’s my cue.” your head whips away from the argument and to allison as she moves from behind your only cover. the others stop fighting and the three of you shout at her to stop, but she’s already began to fight against the wave of energy flowing from the room vanya was being held in.

after hearing her yell out for the woman, there’s a thump on the other side of your cover, and you suck in a breath.

“alright, i’m going.” diego tells the two of you after peaking out from behind the wall.

“no, wait, wait, wait, wait,” klaus grabs onto his arm to stop him from going.

the other looks at him in annoyance, “what?”

“if you don’t make it back, there’s one thing that i need to tell you.” diego was beginning to wave him off, since you didn’t exactly have time for a heart to heart. “you look like antonio banderas with the long hair.”

you slap a hand to your forehead as diego looked at him as if he told him the most sincere thing. “thanks, man.”

“my god,” you groan, crawling over klaus in order to peak around and watch as the man digs his knives into the floor. as he begins to slow, you bite your lip, “keep going!” you shout, “you can do it!”

“i’m not gonna make it!” he shouts back to you, and you shake your head as you look back to klaus, who was still curling in on himself. “you guys have to do it!”

he pulls on a tie holding some sort of rope coiled, and it comes flying towards you. a second later, you feel another thump against the wood.

you take a deep, shaky breath. you have to do this. “okay, klaus.” you glance over at him as you reach up towards the rope, “if i die, just know...” you think for a moment as you bite into your lip, wondering if it’s the best idea to pour your feelings out at a moment like this.

“no,” you sigh, “i’ll make it.”

“wait!” klaus yells as he grabs onto you, “what do i need to know?”

you shake your head, “it’s not important.” you make sure your grip is tight, enough for you to make it. “i’ll see you on the other side!”

“don’t die please!”

when you pull yourself from behind your protection, the force of the wave vanya was sending was much stronger than you expected it to be. your eyes were watering as you tried to look forward, into the flashing lights, but they were already giving you a headache.

you hear klaus shouting at you, but you can’t hear him over the energy. just as you were getting closer to the door, your strength was weakening, but you continued moving one hand at a time to pull yourself forward.

when you pull your eyes away for one second to look away from the lights, your hand misses the rope, and your eyes widen as you lose your grip and go flying back, straight into the wall.

-

your head feels like it’s spinning when you wake up, the lack of the whooshing energy making your ears ring. it feels like the air has been knocked out of you, and it probably was. “oh god, i can’t breathe.”

“are you okay?” the one who caused all of this runs to the four of you.

“vanya,” allison breathes out from beside you.

you groan as you push yourself up, ignoring the dizziness you felt. “physically or emotionally?” klaus questions as he holds himself up on his elbows.

diego pushes himself onto his knees, looking up to her with a smile. “you’re alive.”

“did we save the world or what?” klaus questions as he finally sits up.

you run your fingers through your hair, “i think so. the building’s still here.”

the ticking of diego’s watch catches your attention as you look to it. “kennedy’s a few minutes away.” he points out, quickly getting to his feet, “i can still save him.”

allison calls to him as he begins his way down the hall, following after him in an attempt to stop him.

“is that blood?” you look to klaus as he questions you, and it’s only then that you notice the metallic taste in your mouth.

reaching up to touch your lip, you flinch when you realize it had somehow split open. you cringe at the slight sting the contact brought. “nah, it’s ketchup.” you chuckle as you wipe the blood from your lip.

he rolls his eyes. “we need to patch it up. i’m sure there’s some sort of medical kit stashed away around here.”

“no need,” you wave your hand in the air, “i can take care of myself. we have some more important things to worry about.”

shaking his head, he pushes himself up off the ground before holding his hand out to you. “we already saved the world. everyone else can deal with diego.”

sighing, you take his hand and he helps you up off the ground.

after searching all nearby rooms, you eventually find a med kit. being in an office, it was easiest to hop up onto the desk to let klaus take care of the wound.

once he had opened the kit and grabbed everything he needed, he stepped in front of you. “that was an interesting experience.” he comments about the whole ordeal you just went through.

“that’s our lives.” you respond with a sigh.

nodding, he grabs a paper towel that had been soaked in water. you both decided it was the best way to clean it, at least a little bit.

“this might hurt.” he tells you softly, carefully grabbing your chin to press the paper to your lip. he’s right. it felt like it was burning from the slightly rough texture, but you were able to ignore it. you had gone through worse, after all.

after a second of dabbing at the cut, he pulls the towel away with a smile. “there we go. all clean.” he throws the towel to the side and grabs one of the surgical tape strips, carefully using it to close the wound. “hopefully that works.” he claps his hands together.

you smile, quickly stopping when you feel the tape and your cut trying to pull open. “thanks.” you hum, before you notice the blood that had poured from his nose.

without saying a word, you grab the wet towel. after folding it over to avoid the part covered with your blood, you grab his chin to pull him towards you. “what are you doing?” he questions.

“blood.” you tell him simply, wiping away at the already drying liquid. your eyebrows furrow as you tilt his chin, “how did you get some on your neck?”

he simply shrugs as you clean it up.

shaking your head, you look him over to make sure there wasn’t anymore blood on him. you still hold his chin as he looks at you, a small grin on his face. “checking me out?”

“for blood, yes.” you chuckle, releasing him and tossing the towel into a nearby trash can.

he’s still looking at you, and you let your shoulders fall slightly to release some of the tension in them, “why are you staring at me like that?”

“i’m glad you didn’t die.” he tells you.

you let out a soft laugh, “well, i’m glad you didn’t die either.”

he grins, glancing to the side for a second, “what were you going to tell me?” he asks.

“hm?” your eyebrows raise a bit.

“before you tried to make it to vanya,” he expands on his question, “you said you wanted me to know something.”

you knew exactly what he was talking about, but you thought about just acting clueless. apparently you didn’t think enough before sacrificing yourself earlier.

sitting up slightly, you shrug, “i... i don’t know. it doesn’t matter.”

“what are you talking about? of course it matters.” he hops up on the desk to sit next to you, his legs swinging slightly. “just spit it out. you know it will feel better.”

looking to him, your shoulders slump slightly. “it’s hard to say.” you sigh, running your hand down your face, and beginning to feel that your heart is beating just a little bit faster than before. “okay, i’m just gonna say it. i like you. i might even be in love with you, i-”

you’re not able to finish your rambling about your feelings, since the moment he had heard you admit to them he had leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours.

your heart felt like it was soaring as your eyes closed, and you could feel the slight sting in your lip but it didn’t matter because shit, klaus was kissing you.

you’re not sure how long it lasted, but it didn’t feel long enough once he pulled away. it took a moment for your eyes to open again, as you were relishing the moment. but a smile is on both of your faces when you look at him, and you know then that you are definitely in love with him.

taglists

main: @horrorklaus @megasimpleplan4ever  

tua: @rasberrymay @noodlextrash @atomicpillar @malfovs  @andreasworlsboring101​  

klaus: none yet

it was also requested that i tag @theumbrellaamattemy​

[thed4rkhand]

Kim Taehyung Nakshatra

Kim Taehyung and his Nakshatra analysis.

I got this really cool request about Kim Taehyung and him potentially being a Vishaka rising, and I really wanted to analyze it. So here is what I came up with, hope you guys enjoy this as much as I enjoyed poking about.

Let me make it clear right off the bat, that since I’m not a professional astrologer, some things may not match up, further since we’re not super sure of his birth time, it’ll definitely affect the reading. What I can be sure of is that I’ll do my best and I’m completely open to constructive criticism from you all!

Now lets get on with some basic stuff, for those who have not yet read the post with Namjoon’s moon analysis, I’ll again reiterate some principles of Vedic astrology! In the scenario that you’re still confused with all this jargon, feel free to reach out and I’ll be more than happy to help you out.

Starting out, we have to note that while western astrology is usually more advisory in nature, Vedic astrology’s main purpose is to predict. Also, we usually go a sign back from western astrology in Vedic astrology, so according to that for example, if you’re a libra rising, you become a virgo rising in Vedic astrology and so on and so forth. All planets will also shift back a sign, so a Capricorn Mercury will become a Sagittarius Mercury.

Since this is the first ‘only nakshatra analysis’ concerned posts on this blog, ill pre-explain some other facets of Nakshatras too. For those of you who don’t understand it still, you can refer to my post dedicated to explaining what nakshataras are through the master-list.

Now a person may display qualities other than that of their ascendant nakshatra, or moon or sun, because sometimes people have stellium or maybe an exalted planet or maybe a really strong planet in another Nakshatra, or maybe a lone planet in a certain Nakshatra is aspecting the lagna or even a stellium, that would all alter the degree to which the nakshatra would individually affect the person. So for this analysis, we will check the ascendant only, and other than that, we’ll check any aspects and lastly the nakshatra lord, and the dispositers.

So for this reading, we’ve taken the birth time as 4:15am on 30th December 1995, and birthplace is set to daegu, south korea (even if this isn’t where he’s born, rest assured since south korea is fairly small, it wont matter much).

Now on with the actual reading part-

So his ascendant is at 29’37 degrees in libra in the Nakshatra of Vishaka, within the third quadrant, where quadrant ruler is Mercury through Gemini. Vishaka’s ruler jupiter is in the third house, conjunct sun and mars in sagittarius, (i.e mooltrikon for jupiter). Jupiter itself sits in mula nakshatra and within the second quadrant of this.

Now onto the really cool stuff, since this stuff is being introduced for the first time, i’ll create a proper post explaining it, post it before this so you guys can check that out too. So keep cross checking it, otherwise i'll have to add it before each Nakshatra analysis.

His nakshatra here is vishaka, misra in nature, caste is mlechh, guna is sattwic, gana is rakshasa, purpose is dharma, deities are Indra and Agni, element is fire, gender is female, animal is tiger, Nadi is kappha and sign is libra.

So now getting on with the actual interpretation of the Vedic jargon above is here-

Firstly, lets get started with the main Nakshatra here, Vishaka. This falls between libra and scorpio, with the first 3 quadrants in libra and the last one in scorpio. Vishaka is represented by two forked branches, reprinting the constant inner battle inside the natives. They may appear very orthodox at times, very stubborn and fixed in their views and traditions, however such people are also extremely progressive and accepting. Due to this weird polarization, some natives have extreme trouble putting forth their views on many subjects here, and tend to observe others for a long time before making up their minds about something. Since the sign is inherently ruled by fire, such people are extremely intense and intimidating to others and love being in the spotlight while being surrounded by loved ones. However due to this intense nature and love for the spotlight, these people have a hard time maintaining friendships. Jupiter is their ruling planet, and you can see that influence in them, too. They are some of the most unconventionally intelligent people you will meet. Add to that their beliefs of spirituality and non-violence, and you’ve got the perfect person, however They are prone to addictions like drugs and alcohol, and they are also overly self-conscious. Instead of enjoying what they have, they will always concentrate on what they lack, therefore being called ‘the star of purpose’, for they’re always searching for a new purpose.

It is often believed that the lover of lord Krishna, Radha was born under this nakshatra. Thus it is believed, such natives have immense charm and beauty, while being innately pure within. They have people falling for them one after another, but once they find someone or something they like, they’ll remain devoted to it. Such people have a ‘Je ne sais quoi’ about them, one can’t very well point it out, but something so magnetic is present. They’re often said to be in direct connect with the divine (lord Krishna was after all a god), and are blessed by god for good fortune.

The native of this nakshatra might be interested in astrology and art.The natives of this nakshatra are good-natured and likes fair-judgement. They have a interest in religion and love the religious rituals too. They speak softly and due to which they easily impress others. They usually don’t speak harshly. Due to the effect of Jupiter they are always ready to learn and teach others. They are ambitious and don’t believe in following the societal rules. They work hard to achieve their ambitions and due to which they receive success also. The natives are wealthy, powerful and have an impressive nature and therefore people get easily impressed by them. The person is compassionate and confluence of ethics, rites and good qualities in the person. Due to the combination of all these qualities the native becomes financially sound also. The native believes in saving money due to which they never face financial crisis. They can influence others with their word. However on the flip side, They like showing off and are a bit arrogant by nature. Vishakha nakshatra is the nakshatra of Jupiter, that is why they have a mild behavior. But they are short tempered also. According to their behavior they are always ready to fight with others. (see how jin and tae, and vmin always fight, in-fact he was named as one of the members most likely to pick a fight)

Something I found very interesting is how Taehyung’s ascendant falls in the 3rd pada or quadrant of Vishaka, which corresponds to the sound ‘Te’ as in pronunciation wise ‘Tae’, and being named taehyung is thus extremely auspicious for him. This is rare among people unaware of Vedic traditions, and no wonder it has worked so well for his fortune and luck.

Now Jupiter through vishaka Rules Lower Abdomen, Bladder parts, kidneys, pancreatic glands, Genitals, Rectum, Prostate Gland, Descending colon. Thus the natives are prone to nose bleeding, renal stone, dropsy, rupture, prostate enlargement, fibroid tumor, urinary trouble.

Now he’s born under the third quadrant. These natives are light-hearted and curious. They enjoy learning and acquiring knowledge on diverse topics. However they may be afflicted by anxiety and often struggle with conflicting emotions regarding work and love, material and spiritual realms and so much more (remember that gemini is two faced, and vishaka itself is branched). Since it falls under gemini, such people are social butterflies, amicable, smart and communicative.Due to their warm and altruistic personality, they can easily make friends with others. Their diversity of personal interests also helps them to form friendships with a wide variety of people. Thus they have no issue maintaining an active and vibrant social life. They are extremely wise for their age and have a natural insight into the workings of the world and of human nature. They are truthful and devout, and are naturally-inclined toward spirituality. They bring energy and enthusiasm to whatever tasks they undertake.

Now we’ll brush over the nakshatra lord quickly, and then move back into really fun nakshatra stuff.

Jupiter as ruler of vishaka is in the 3rd house, conjunct sun and mars, with no aspects.The natives are good planners (3rd house is short distant journeys). Besides, they are highly curious and enjoy making connections with others. They feel happy to share ideas. They are able to see the larger picture and often turn to others for advice and suggestions.  Also, they easily put the people at ease in social situations and have higher mental capabilities. They can become intuitive as Jupiter will expand their mental power, so they can even grasp new information quickly and comprehend things effortlessly. The placement of Jupiter in the 3rd house will also help the natives in education. The natives are likely to excel in writing and literary fields( his degree is in communications and broadcasting I believe). Since this is also the house of younger siblings, people have great relationships with their siblings here.Since the 3rd house is also a upachaya sthana (house of growth) the native will have good growth of career and wealth, and with its aspect on the 7th house, marital bliss is also guaranteed. Aspects on the 11th and 9th houses promise a powerful social circle, and gains through foreign land as well as fame.

However, despite all these great results from sitting in its mooltrikon, Jupiter is still afflicted by sun and mars. Such people with age (upachaya house moves with age) speak less and less because they think twice before they speak and choose their words very carefully. With this conjunction of 3 masculine friendly planets thus when together in a house, makes people highly influential. The native tends to enjoy a good financial and social status. This conjunction is often found in the horoscope of influential and high-ranking individuals such as politicians. When Sun, Mars and Jupiter are housed together in a horoscope, the native earns a lot of wealth, fame, and respect in life. Such people live a prosperous life for the most part and do not have to work hard to make it big, as they have unpaid karma they receive in this lifetime. Moreover, these natives tend to be very loyal and straightforward.

Now onto dissecting the nakshatra even more, let's get into the characteristics of vishaka.

Being of Misra nature, they are of an extremely fiery temperament, are actually prone to being pyromaniacs too. I have noticed that such people also have great metabolisms. They are quiet in large crowds, and prefer one to one conversations and are also extremely philanthropic. Great organizers, extremely interested in art and technology, and absolutely brilliant at getting rid of bad habits (fire purifies).

Vishakha is a monstrous nakshatra. People in this group are generally intuitive, strong-willed, and assertive. They may be prone to anger and violence. However Libra natives possess excellent taste and good judgement. They are friendly, learned, and dignified, but may be prone to arrogance as persons born under the star of Vishakha have a wide sphere of influence. For this reason, they do well in social and political arenas. It is said that that the natives under vishaka have vyapana shakti, or the power to “Achieve and Make Manifest, Power to Achieve many and various Fruits of Life” (remember how he always talks to his angels?)

Now he’s a mleccha caste, which according to Vedic traditions means an outsider or an outcaste (as these people did not follow societal rules, or fit into the Vedic practices as they were of foreign origin). This could honestly be why we talk about his 4D personality, because of the caste. He has an unconventional way of doing things and thinking, which don’t fit into the broader spectrum due to this. Also we can see that it follows the dharma nakshatra, so he is inherently concerned with principles, morals, duty and finding his life’s purpose. This can make his very spiritually inclined and intuitive, also very restless and prone to depression. Now coming to his dosa of kaphha, (the Water quality). This makes a native very philosophical, calm and patient, sometimes so much so that other’s perceive them as lazy, and simply ‘lucky’. With his sattwa qualities here, with Jupiter, a rajas planet, he can often has a duality between rajas qualities with fiery temperament and passion for everything and then an extremely calm and cool quality of sattwa, where one is not concerned about the consequences of their actions and are concerned with being in the moment.

The yoni of the nakshatra is a male tiger (tae tae?). This means the natives have attributes similar to those of tigers.Tigers are handsome and powerful people with an innate self-confidence and elegance. There's a sense of immediacy and an aura of electricity that surrounds it, and when it walks into a room, it feels like something is about to happen. Once a tiger has found its groove, it will focus on its goal with a brightly burning intensity. In social situations, the tiger is an excellent host and there is no such thing as a casual party in its home. Guests can always expect a memorable occasion with an extravagance of food and drink, and yet, there is a distinct coldness to its den. Having sacrificed comfort for style, the tiger outfits its house with austere and modern furniture, and comfortably worn easy chairs are replaced every few years.But their emotional detachment should not be confused with a desire to avoid tenderness; for intimacy is the tiger's greatest sensual tool. Offering its lover some deeply held secrets adds another dimension to both platonic and romantic relationships for a tiger. They are fiercely independent and always on the move, so it can be quite hard to discern such people.

And lastly coming to the deities of the nakshatra, the two deities, Indra (Lord of Lightning) and Agni (Lord of Fire), are known to rule this nakshatra. Hence, Vishakha witnesses the relay of characteristics of both of these ruling deities. Since both of these deities exhibit some characteristics which are not in accordance with the other, Vishakha becomes a mixture of different kinds of characteristics. Lightening tends to have similar impact with the forcefulness of the light, and the destructive power to do what it sets out to do. The energy of Agni however, is more cleansing. Agni is the God which takes our oblations offered to the Gods to them. It is the energy that gives us the opportunity to cook food and nourish ourselves. It creates ashes from all that is offered making it pure and able to clean any impurities. The natives can have a lot to do with justice, social righteousness and causes. There could be a lot of intensity here especially to do the right thing and a lot of righteous principle because of these two deities.

Finally, a shortened version of Vedic tradition story associated with the nakshatra-

Indra, according to Vedic Mythology, is known to be very goal-oriented, and who is often insecure about losing his throne to someone else. In an attempt to keep his throne intact he commits many deeds that can be bad karmas according to Vedic Astrology. For example, Indra once tried to kill the pregnant wife of demon Hiranyakshipu in order to stop him from worshipping Lord Brahma and getting great powers as a result of his worship. Indra feared that Hiranyakshipu will gain powers and then attack the heavens and remove him from his throne and in order to save his throne he tried to disturb the worship of Hiranyakshipu by every possible means. Though he did not succeed due to the intervention of DevRishi (Sage) Naarad who was able to influence the higher Gods to stop Indra from committing such a heinous deed. This goal oriented nature of Indra is relayed through Vishakha and accordingly the natives under the strong influence of this nakshatra are very fixated on their goals and they are always in a danger of engaging in bad karmas in order to achieve their goals.

Indra is also known for his deep interests in drinking, women and enjoying other pleasures and these qualities of Indra are also relayed through this nakshatra and accordingly the natives under the strong influence of this nakshatra are likely to be fond of materialistic pleasures of all kinds. Agni on the other hand is seen as the ruling deity of Fire according to Vedic mythology and he is portrayed as the one with a good character. The influence of Agni on Vishakha brings sufficient energy to this nakshatra which can help the natives achieve their goals.

An incident is quoted in Vedic mythology where a demon prayed to god Agni to protect him and then after assurance from Agni, he started worshipping lord Brahma for gaining powers. Indra, seeing it as a threat to his power came to kill the demon but Agni who had promised the demon to save him, came in the way and fought Indra and prevented him from killing the demon. It should be noted that Agni fought with Indra in order to practice the right deeds despite the fact that Indra was his king. So the influence of Agni on this nakshatra brings positive qualities of Agni and how a particular native under the influence of Vishakha will behave is very much dependent on which of these two ruling deities is controlling Vishakha in his horoscope.

Anyway, this was my analysis of the nakshatra, hope you guys enjoyed it! Let me know about other stuff too, and ill be more than happy to help!

[noneatnonedotcom]

the art is by @exp1016 and it was so good that i decided to write a story for it. this was edited by @thatorigamiguy

Business and Pleasure

Jaune was somewhat disillusioned with being an adult. Not that he hated his life or anything, It was more that he had come to understand that ninety percent of life was bullshit to fill the time; the other ten percent was screaming in terror as you tried to stop the cock up cascade that had just started before it hit critical mass and destroyed a town.

Married life was not too dissimilar though the most significant change was that Jaune knew that Yang was there for him despite everything. It meant that there was a level of happiness that Jaune could never truly dip below. It also meant the high points of his life were significantly higher.

This is why it wasn’t too hard to focus on the paperwork in front of him. He and Yang both made money through the protection of the town as their resident Huntsmen, with their payment typically coming in the form of food and board with a little pay when the town had sold their harvest.

Jaune had since added in a few techniques for homesteading his dad had taught him as a boy, and as it  turns out, he would have made a damn good farmer if his heart wasn’t set on being a Huntsman. Since most of the techniques to improve the harvest were by their nature passive, it means the town had a lot more time on its hands and a lot more food and money to go around. This, of course, was not without its drawbacks. 

More food and money, meant more commerce to their town. More Commerce meant more people flocking to their town, settling down, and either becoming farmers or starting their own trade. More hard working people meant more output, and with more output came an economic growth. So then, what exactly was the drawback of having more people, more workers, and more commerce?

Well for starters, idle hands are the Devil's favorite playthings. With the townsfolk having to work less hours, that meant it was time for them to cut loose and have fun. And “fun,” often meant either having one to many down at the local tavern and acting like a drunk idiot, starting fights with people and causing property damage; or it meant that the local youth liked to go around causing trouble for others through either mild, but annoying pranks, or through going around and breaking things and acting like complete hooligans.

 With less time spent on working hard to distract them, now they spent that time hardly working and acting like complete menaces around the town.

Then, there was of course, less pleasant folk that started coming around as if late. These were the undesirables, miscreants, thugs, and other would be thieves that came wandering into town thinking they could make an easy profit by robbing the people of their hard earned coin. Why bother to put in the work, when you can just take it off those who've already done it for you? So, the town had decided that they were in need of a Sheriff, and Jaune had all but been given the title through an all around unanimous agreement from the townsfolk.

Now, to say that Jaune was less than pleased with this sudden responsibility would be an understatement, but not for reasons you might think. Jaune was more than happy to take the role of Sheriff for the town, they needed one after all and Jaune found that he fit into the position quite well. No, what had really annoyed Jaune was that the townsfolk had also decided he was the best fit for the towns Headman position as well, something that was quite unexpected and one that Jaune found to be a pain in his side more than anything.

In other words, Jaune was basically handed two of the most powerful positions of a rapidly growing and expanding township, with all of the unfortunate responsibilities of both words to go along with it. 

The only upside of Jaune's sudden shift to a leadership position was that he and Yang were moved into the Headsman house, which was more of a manor than a simple house compared to the rest of the townsfolk’s lodging. Jaune and Yang would later learn that the community had been started by the servants of a long-dead noble household that used to tend to the manor, and their descendants have been living within the town ever since.

So Jaune found himself spending less time in the field, and more of his time spent in the office filing paperwork and guiding his deputies around to do most of the legwork for him. Was it the most exciting thing in the world? No, but Jaune found that he enjoyed the work and was quite content knowing that he was providing for Yang and setting up a strong foundation for their family when they got around to making one. 

Jaune's thoughts were interrupted when his secretary came walking into his office, and she instantly caught his eye. She was a knockout with long blonde hair, a shirt clearly too tight for her that he could only assume was combat certified with the force those poor buttons were under. A pencil skirt clung to her hips, and as she looked at him through her glasses, Jaune knew that today he was going to have quite a bit of fun at work. “Mr. Arc, I believe that is all for today,” she began, “maybe it’s time you took a break?” 

Though her tone was light, she spoke with an air of confidence as she slowly approached his desk. The approach was slow, her hips swaying from side to side in a mesmerizing manner, while she had a light, almost mischievous smile on her face as she kept eye contact with him. She wasn’t merely approaching him, no, she was stalking towards him like a big cat eyeing up her prey, all feline grace and confidence. She knew what she was doing to him, and she was reveling in it. Jaune stood, smirking at the challenge, and walking around his desk. A lot of seduction was posturing, non-verbal communication and like most forms of communication, the more you did it with someone, the better you were at it. He and his secretary were no strangers to this dance, but he still loved every second of it. Just as much as he loved his wife. “Then do you have a suggestion as to what I could do instead,” he asked, letting his voice go lower. Something you would feel more than hear and she, for her part, tilted her head down and looked up at him with her eyes. Making her seem so small, so vulnerable, but the apparent lust in her eyes only served to enhance the image. “Well, I’ve got a few things in mind,” she said with a smile, her hands trailing  absentmindedly across her body, making his eyes follow her curves, “there are three things, in particular, I’m going to have you do.” “Miss Xiao-long, what would my wife say if she heard you,” he gasped out in false shock. She only smirked at his question, before her hand came up to his chest, pushing him back lightly till he was leaning against the desk. She kept her hand on his chest, caressing his pecs in a soothing manner while she reveled in the feeling of hard, corded muscle hiding beneath his work shirt. “Mrs. Arc will never know sir, I promise,” she stated in a reassuring manner, before she leaned in and placed a slow sensual kiss on his lips. He felt the hand on his chest unbuttoning his shirt in a well practiced manner, exposing his bare skin for the world to see. Her eyes lit up at the sight of his toned body and defined muscles, before she started to lay down a trail of kisses starting from his chest and ending with her on her knees by the time she had made it to his abs.

“So why don’t you let me help you relieve all that pent up energy,” she said from her kneeling position, lilac eyes fogged over with lust as she began to slowly unbutton and unzip his pants, “it seems so wrong to keep something like you caged up.” “Something like me,” he asked with a raised eyebrow. “An apex predator, an animal,” she said with a lusty smile, before gasping in awe at the size of the now freed cock she held in her hands. Her mind was clouded over with lust as took in the sight of the member she held in her hand, her mind unable to formulate a proper response. “I look forward to being devoured,” she all but whispered out, unable to take her eyes off his member.

Jaune only smirked in response, before he wrapped her silk-like blonde hair around his hand, and forced her mouth down his shaft, groaning in pleasure as she took it all in.

By the ancestors, he loved his job.

Hours later, Jaune and Yang found themselves laying on the office floor, bodies covered in a sheen of sweat as they held their naked bodies in one another’s arms. Usually, the furniture tended to be obliterated in the process of their fun(and at one point, the whole office when they both activated their semblances), but this time was more about the seduction and worshiping each other than it was about the act. That wasn’t to say that they didn’t enjoy getting rough with one another still, but as they got older, they had started to develop more refined tastes into their lovemaking. That, and it was less money spent having to replace everything that was broken in their fun, and less embarrassing having to explain to the repairmen how everything had been broken in the first place. Jaune couldn’t stop the smile spreading on his face as he looked down upon the sleeping form of his wife, before he leaned down and planted a quick peck on the top of her forehead. He was slowly drifting asleep himself, until eyes shot open as he felt a small hand trail down his body towards his member once more. He slowly felt his eyes drifting back towards his wife, only to be greeted with her smirking visage as her hand was wrapped firmly around his member, slowly getting ready for another round. “I heard you were with that Xiao-long slut you call your secretary again.” Jaune tried to fake a denial, but Yang only chuckled in response, “I don’t mind, you’re a strong man, more than enough for the two of us. But I do need to remind that whore just who belongs to who.” Yang slowly arched a leg over him, letting him feel her smooth skin as she carefully positioned herself on top of his now hardened member, “So why don’t we teach that slut just who’s the Wife…”Jaune let out a pleasurable moan as she lowered herself onto his shaft, gritting her teeth as she took him in, inch by inch, before she fully sheathed herself against the base of his groin. She let out a sigh of pleasure, before leaning over to give him a faceful of her large, warm, breast, a sensual smile on her face as her lilac eyes once again fogged over with lust. “...And who’s the Mistress.” As Yang readied herself to keep going, she found her concentration ruined when Jaune, breaking character for a moment, lowered her down so that he could plant a loving kiss on her lip.

“I love you so much, you know that,” he said with a happy smile on his face. This caused Yang to break her own character, as she began blushing harder than a schoolgirl lusting over her crush, before she covered her face in embarrassment.

“JAUNE,” She screamed, “YOU JUST CAN’T DO THAT WITHOUT WARNING!” Jaune only laughed in response to his wife’s overreaction, before he thrusted up into her with a determined look on his face. Yang, clearly caught off guard, screamed his name in surprise, pleasure, and still a fair bit of embarrassment from the earlier unscripted affection. The older you got, the less magical the world became, and it started to become clear that not everything is as good as it can be. It becomes clear that life is full of ups and downs, and a never ending cycle of trying to balance responsibilities to keep yourself from crashing and burning too soon. but it was small moments like these that could only make Jaune think one thing:

‘I love being an adult…”

[mothmannnnn]

Hello sexy beautiful awesome cool swag mutuals, Gar asked me to finish a fic they wrote and we wanted to share :p Read at your own risk <3

-

If luck—a notion he’d only allowed himself to entertain after meeting James Kirk—really did exist, then it was only logical to assume its opposite existed as well. Bad luck. 

Spock couldn’t think up the logistics of the situation he and Kirk had found themselves in: why he was injured on a too-cold planet, how they had lost their communicators, how they had run into the sort of intelligent life they weren’t supposed to interact with—why they now sat, shoulders pressed together, inside a hollow alien tree. In his current, less than stellar state, he wondered if it was statistically possible to have this much bad luck.

They were able to elude their assailants through Kirk’s resourcefulness. He had eyed the hiding place while they were running from their assailants, an area near the roots they had just been able to squeeze past and fit inside. Spock vaguely wondered if the tree had rotten out, or if a creature similar to the earth woodpecker inhabited the planet and had once called the space they now sat in its home. He wondered why the wood on this planet was a pale shade of blue, the trees even more massive than the redwoods, and how this miraculous life could happen somewhere so cold. He wondered about the probability of his survival. Spock ghosted his fingers over his bloodstained abdomen. 

“Spock . . . Spock.” Kirk had his hand on his shoulder and was looking into his eyes, and Spock had to rip himself from his own mind. “You’re shaking,” He said. Spock was suddenly aware of the almost violent tremor of his own body, of the biting cold on his ears and hands and everywhere except where Kirk had his leg pressed up against his. 

“I’m very cold, Captain, and I believe—” he had to stop himself, he had to stop shaking, he had to gain back some control. He took a breath—too deep—and pain blossomed in his side, time tripping over itself. It was so cold out. “I believe I may be bleeding internally, from the injuries I sustained.” he said. 

Kirk was leaning over him then, eyes wide as they searched over him, one hand on Spock’s shoulder and the other hovering hesitantly over the blood stains on his uniform. “How bad is it? is there anything I can do? Are you—“ Spock grabbed Kirk’s wrist before he could flood him with more questions, before he could touch him and defile his hands with his blood. He didn’t like to see Kirk like this, anxious, and he especially didn’t like that he was the cause. 

“I can do something about it but . . . I must focus all my energy on healing myself.” Spock said, finally meeting Kirks eyes. He nodded, his mask of cool command back on. 

“The healing trance?” Kirk confirmed. 

“Yes but I—” There was too much going on, the cold, the bleeding, the hiding (James Kirk’s thigh pressed against his, hand in his, his worry) “I can’t regulate my body temperature while in the trance, I need some external method of—” Kirk pulled his hand away from Spock’s grip and went for the hem of his own shirt. He’d had it half way up his chest before Spock was able to catch Jim’s shirt and pull it back down. “No captain, you can’t-” Spock started, taken completely off guard but beginning to catch on to what Kirk had been thinking. 

“The extra clothing will keep you warm Spock, please just let me—“

“Your body heat is sufficient, Captain,” Spock insisted. Although he knew it was not logical, as Kirk’s body was better equipped to withstand the cold and therefore he would be able to spare the cotton shirt, Spock felt hesitant prioritizing his captain’s comfort below his own. 

Kirk looked thoughtful for a minute, his brows furrowing and his hands absentmindedly rubbing his jawline. 

Spock was getting delirious—he knew it was due to the increasing loss of blood in his body. He must begin the healing trance as promptly as possible, but a strange, illogical thought wormed itself into his mind. What will Jim do while I am gone? 

If they were to be revealed by their assailants, it would be highly unlikely that Jim could fend for himself, and it would be too dangerous to pull himself out of the healing trance. 

Before Spock could think of a solution, he felt warm hands around his waist, a strong chest against his, and the point of Jim Kirk’s chin on the crook of his neck. 

“Captain, you’ll get blood on your uniform.” 

“Tough luck,” was Jim Kirk’s eloquent reply. “We’ll have to be in close proximity for my body heat to do anything for you.” 

“Well, I . . .” Spock’s words trailed off, and he was, for perhaps only the second time in his life, at a loss for words. 

He found something akin to courage in his deliriousness, pulling away so that he might look Kirk in his eyes. “I do not like showcasing my . . . differences, as compared to you, Captain.” He motioned to the greenness of his blood, slowly darkening and expanding across his abdomen. 

“Spock, that is perhaps the most illogical thing you’ve ever said.” Astonishingly, he heard amusement in Jim’s voice, despite their current situation. When he looked over, eyes barely able to open, he saw that his captain’s lips were pulled into a ghost of a smile. His eyebrows, however, were still furrowed with concern. “What does it matter if your ears are pointed or your blood is green? Why would it ever matter to me?” There were unspoken words within that statement, even Spock was able to identify that. But he was not quite able to extract the meaning. Why would it ever matter to me? 

“I know it is not logical, but I have always envied the redness in your veins, Jim.” If Kirk had noticed the slip in formalities, he did not reveal it. “Red is the color of vitality, of passion. It is something I will never possess beyond a medicinal diagnoses. But green . . . green is the color of cowardice. Of envy.” 

“You’re not speaking any sense, Mr. Spock.”

“There are many things I do not have the courage to tell you, Jim.” 

If the silence that followed was indicative of disgust, Spock might have felt shame. But Kirk only lifted one gentle hand to Spock’s cheek, and wiped a tear that he had not known had fallen. 

“I’ll be here when you wake up, Spock,” Kirk reassured, prompting him to fall into his healing trance. He could not hold out for much longer. “We’ll get through this, I promise, and . . . when you’re awake, maybe you’ll feel a little more courageous.” 

Through their connection, both physical and emotional, Spock could feel the tug of emotions in Kirk’s chest. Stress, worry, regret and surprisingly—the last thing he felt before slipping off to unconsciousness—affection beyond platonic admiration. 

He slept. 

-

As promised, Jim was there when he awoke on the Enterprise again. He was still a little bruised, and his lip was split, but other than that, Spock could not discern any permanent physical harm.

“You’re awake,” 

Humans had an interesting habit of announcing something that was not in need of announcement. 

“I am,” Spock nodded, noticing that he had been relocated to a corner cot in the medical bay. “How long was I in the healing trance?”

Before Kirk could reply, a voice interrupted from the doorway. A booming, slightly southern accent that Spock recognized immediately, despite the state of his foggy memory. “A week,” Doctor McCoy said. “And what a hell of a week!”

“Hello, Doctor,” Spock greeted the newcomer. 

McCoy went on as if he had not heard him, muttering, “I thought Jim might go mad and strangle me! Waiting in here like some wartime widow, what a hassle!”

He went on like this, spewing good-natured insults until he exited the room, holding Spock’s file (which he presumed was what McCoy had originally came in the room for). 

Kirk looked at Spock, the tips of his ears red. This blush, which creeped up his neck, was what prompted Spock to remember the last conversation they had. 

The color of vigor. Of passion. The courage that Spock had lacked, until, in a lapse of judgment, he had admitted his best-kept secret: his feelings for James Kirk. 

“I’m glad you’re awake, Mr. Spock—even if Bones isn’t,” the tone of his voice was light, nothing remarkably fond, but his hand reached down and gently held Spock’s. 

The action was innocent enough, Spock knew. He had seen many humans hold each other’s hands for comfort, for solace. But to himself, a Vulcan, the intimate action made his own ears glow green.

“It’s okay if you don’t have the courage right now, Spock,” Jim continued. He smiled, and Spock found himself wanting to do the same. “You were very brave on that planet.” 

In a rare show of physical affection, Spock lifted Kirk’s hands to his lips, and kissed the soft palm. 

Understanding the meaning of this action, Kirk in turn lifted Spock’s hand to his own mouth, pressing a warm kiss on the back of his hand. 

“When you’re ready, Mr. Spock,” Kirk smiled, “I think we should take a long shore leave—somewhere warmer, preferably.” 

Spock squeezed the hands still holding his, hoping that this seemingly modest reaction could begin to express all the feelings he had for Jim Kirk. That perhaps Jim might feel, through his own human senses, Spock’s unfailing devotion to him. 

“Yes, Captain,” he said. “I would like that very much.”