#on this day 24 years ago you were birthed and the world was never the same

[downtherabbitholewithlucy]

When you're at your lowest, this friend will always be there to lend a hand...

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA For telling my partner I'd like to bring my ex into our relationship?

I'm copying this over from r/relationship_advice, because the responses are giving me the impression they don't really get what polyamory is & I'm hoping tumblr does. For reference: there's me (29M), my ex (28, Trans Man), and my partner (30M).

My ex and I were best friends in high school, went to the same college, & dated through the tail end of undergrad, for about a year and change. We ended things on very good terms, the only reason we broke up was a difference in life paths: I stayed in the city to get my Master's, he traveled constantly for his work (he's a sculptor who makes these huge custom multimedia pieces, they're genuinely some of the most beautiful things I've seen). We fell out of touch for the most part, but I'd see him popping up on social media occasionally, or he'd text me when he was in town and we'd hang out, along with some other school friends.

The last time I saw him before our present situation was about 3 1/2 years ago today. We went out for drinks, he came back to my place after, and we ended up hooking up. He stayed in town for about a week, and we hooked up a few more times, and then he left again. He sort of dropped off the face of the earth after that, but he'd always been pretty sporadic, especially when he had a big project, so I didn't think much about it.

Not long after that, I met my current partner. He's truly one of my favorite people in the whole world; he's incredibly thoughtful, and earnest, and passionate about his morals & principles (he's an environmental lawyer), and more than anything, he's someone I never feel like I have to pretend with. He asked for my number, we had our first date a few days later, and ended up staying awake the entire night just talking about anything and everything, so we went ahead and got 5am pancakes and called it our second date. We've been together for a little over 3 years now, we've been moved in together for about 2, and while we've had the occasional fight or rough patch I can definitely say I love this man, and I plan to spend the rest of my life with him.

So, the big change.

About a year ago (~2 years since seeing my ex, my partner and I have lived together for about a year at this point), my partner and I are having a night in, and there's a knock at the door. It's my ex, looking absolutely ragged, holding a 15 month old baby. As in, a baby who was conceived 24 months before then. Yep, it's pretty much what you're guessing. I let them both in, we had a sit down in the kitchen, and he told me everything he'd been doing in the past 2 years in between me cussing him out for keeping it all from me in the first place. I really do want to keep this as short as possible, so to give you the super condensed version:

She's my daughter, he's completely sure about that, there's no one else he's been with the math is even close to correct for

The second he found out he was pregnant, he more or less panicked. He's got a whole Thing about feeling like he's irresponsible/not a "real" adult, and this really set him off, so telling me felt like "admitting to fucking both our lives up" at the time. His OB/GYN said some pretty awful shit to him about not being more careful as a trans man too, which just made it all even worse

Because of all that, he'd genuinely planned to just never tell me I have a daughter & raise her completely on his own, but a few things compounded to force his hand:

The birth was really rough on him, and his recovery was slow enough he was having trouble going back to work, to the point where money was getting tight

On top of that, our daughter has celiac disease, and between paying out of pocket for blood tests & spending more on baby food she's safe to eat, things got desperate enough he went and took out a really dodgy loan from a scummy payday company

He was at our door because all of this had finally spiraled to a point where he'd lost his apartment, they'd been sleeping in his car for about a week, and he couldn't think of anything else to do

I think I was probably feeling every human emotion in existence at the same time through all of this, but the thing I remember most from the whole conversation was the way my partner kept drifting right back to the baby, and the soft way he looked at her. We put my ex & daughter up in a hotel room for the night and told him we needed to talk, and we'd discuss our options in the morning, but I think even then I kind of knew what our answer was going to be.

Sure enough, for the last year and a half we've been co-parenting our little girl, all three of us. We didn't want to juggle who's got her, or force my ex to find a place to stay, so we've turned my partner's home office into our daughter's room, and redid most of the downstairs layout so my ex could move into an actual bedroom, rather than just sleep on our pullout couch in perpetuity. We finally succeeded in convincing him that rest and recovery was more important than trying to contribute to the house finances right away, and it's been magical watching all that stress and terror slowly fall off him. It's like he's a little more alive again every time I look.

Which is where my question comes in.

I'd like to restate, I love my partner 100%. None of this changes that whatsoever. If I ask, and he says no, that will be the end of the discussion for me completely. But I have eyes. My ex is, objectively, a very attractive man. I know we work well together, and I have to admit I'm very curious to see where that same chemistry could lead now that he's not on the other side of the country half the time. I've also been noticing these little moments between him and my partner. Nothing I'd consider crossing a line, but I've caught my partner checking my ex out several times, as well as vice versa, and they get along remarkably well. Sometimes I'll go to enter a room, and see them both sitting there laughing and chatting and playing with our baby, and I'll just hang back to watch because it makes me so happy.

Add to all that, we're pretty deeply ingrained in each other's lives now. My partner and I don't often go out on dates alone anymore, but the last few times we did it felt as if my ex was missing from the table. We watched a movie together last night, and my ex sat in the middle of us with his feet in my partner's lap and his head on my chest, and it felt just as natural as my arm on my partner's shoulder. It's not about just having sex with him, and it's not that I'd want to invite any old person into our relationship. I know we already all love each other, and I think there's potential for that to become romantic between the two of us and my ex.

It just feels as though we're all holding our breath, waiting for someone else to say it first. My ex certainly isn't going to bring it up when he's living rent free in "our" home (it's his home too, but he doesn't seem to see it like that yet). My partner grew up sheltered enough that I'm not sure he's ever heard of polyamory at all, so he's not going to bring it up. That just leaves me.

My problem is, if I'm wrong about what I think I'm seeing, or if I bring it up the wrong way, I can't take it back. I don't want my partner to feel insecure or betrayed, I don't want my ex to feel pressured or put on the spot, and I definitely don't want my daughter to lose any of us, which I know could happen if we aren't all on the same page. Or worse, if we do all date and it goes badly.

Should I just keep this whole thing secret? Is that even worse? Would I be the asshole for opening this can of worms on everyone else?

Help!

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Running From The Flames {Epilogue 1/2}

Pairing: Pierre Gasly x OFC Warnings: parenting - that should be a warning lmao, sexual themes

F1 Masterlist || Previous Chapter - Epilogue 2/2

There was only one word to describe my life and that word was: chaotic. That being said, I still wouldn’t change it for the world.

The family calendar on the fridge was completely full and colour coded so we could all see where we were needed on any given day. Even so, I still lost track of my husband or our kids at least once a week. 

“Sydney, honey, have you seen your father?” I asked the spitting image of Pierre who was in the race simulator. He was always in the machine, practising for his upcoming debut into Formula 4 now that he had turned 15 and could move up from karting. 

“Picking up Addie from the airport.” He barely looked away from the triplet of screens in front of him as he answered with all the attitude of a teenage boy being interrupted in life. “It’s on the fridge.”

I looked at the calendar and realised I was looking at the completely wrong day. “Shit.”

“Ha,” he laughed loudly as he navigated the virtual track of the Red Bull Ring. “You forgot.”

“I didn’t forget,” I said as I scanned over the correct day and saw I had a board meeting to prepare for tomorrow. “I just thought it was Tuesday today.”

“Whatever you say, maman. You can tell me I’m your favourite, I won’t say anything.”

“I don’t have a favourite, I love you all equally. Now, can you finish that game and go do your homework? You still need to pack your bag for the weekend too.”

Addie was coming home from London for the week, taking a little break from her own busy schedule, to watch Sydney’s first race with us in Austria. 

It had been difficult to let her leave home at 18 but she had worked hard to get a place in the Arsenal Women’s Under 21 team. I had left home at the same age and Pierre had left even earlier, so we were hardly the exemplary figures to deny her. All we could do was make sure she stayed safe and she knew she could call either of us 24/7 if she needed help. It was also never that long between visits, making plenty of stopovers in England as we travelled. 

The travelling for work was tiresome but so far we had yet to miss a football match on Saturday or a karting race on Sunday. It did help being our own bosses so Pierre and I could manage our schedule around the kids. He had been running Strauss Fashion for the better part of the last ten years, after Granny finally retired properly, while I had been the Chief Technical Officer at Alpine, which Grandpa had purchased. 

When Harry passed away three years ago I found myself suddenly thrust into the ownership of the team and though there were plenty of offers to sell it, I decided to take the leap of faith and see where the journey would take me. I hadn’t looked back and so far we had two Constructors' Championship wins with our seasoned pilots, Gabriele Minì and Oliver Bearman.

We had come so far, it was hard to believe until I saw the wisps of grey hairs among the dark strands. 

“Maman!” I was pulled from my reminiscence and looked at my watch to realise how quickly the afternoon had gotten away from me as Clare bounded through the front door and leapt into my arms. “Maman, look!”

Clare had been a wonderful surprise that completed our family two years ago. After Sydney’s unexpected and frightening early arrival Pierre had been reluctant to try for another child, though he had always wanted three. I thought maybe he would change his mind after the terrifying memory faded with time but then a few years passed, we both got caught up in work, and after that it seemed too hard to imagine returning to sleepless nights with a newborn. 

But, the universe had other plans for us. What I thought was a long-enduring hangover, after celebrating the rebranding of Alpine into Gasly Racing, actually turned out to be morning sickness. Those final weeks before her birth were stressful enough to send Pierre to his doctor for a vasectomy but thankfully her arrival went exactly to plan and he could breathe calmly once again. 

“Hello my Clare-bear, wow, you have another bracelet.” You quirked an eyebrow at Charles as he arrived with Clare’s backpack on his shoulder and her spare carseat under his arm. “Uncle Charles has absolutely spoiled you.”

“Of course. A princess deserves it,” he stated proudly as he placed her belongings down and nodded his head to the simulator. “Is he all ready for the big day?”

“He is, I’m not sure I am,” I admitted as I put Clare down and she immediately went to interrupt Sydney by climbing onto his lap mid-race. If it was anyone else they would have received an earful but he just paused the game and listened as she told him all about her day at Uncle Charles’ house. “God help me when he gets to Formula One, I think I’ll have to revert the car back to a slower predecessor for my own sanity.”

Charles laughed but I wasn’t completely joking. The cars were so much faster than they were when he and PIerre raced. Though the safety features improved along with the technology that made them rockets on wheels it was still difficult to imagine putting my little boy inside one and sending it off. 

“You could keep him as a reserve driver,” Charles offered before shaking his head at the thought and taking a seat at the kitchen island. “But he’s stubborn like his father, he’d just find another team to race for.”

“No way, I can at least trust my own team to keep him safe. Same goes for Marc.”

Charles chuckled at the mention of his son who at 8 years old he was already a junior karting champion. “He said someone called him Il Predestinato after his race last weekend.”

“Yikes, I’m sure they meant it in a good way.”

The front door opened again and Addie blew in with all the gusto of a tornado, whipping around the rooms to greet everyone before she was up the stairs to her old room. Entering a little more sedately was my husband, his arms laden with more suitcases than anyone needed for a week away, especially when she still had a wardrobe full of clothes upstairs. 

“You are lucky you only have sons,” Pierre said to Charles as he kicked the door closed behind him. “I don’t work out enough anymore to be carrying this shit.” 

He dropped the suitcases in front of the elevator and hit the call button rather than carrying them up the stairs before pushing them inside as the door opened. After a few bad winters, where not even the central heating could keep the aches of my bones at bay, Pierre had made the call for the elevator to be installed and it had been a godsend in moments like this when heavy items needed to make it to the floors above.

Sticking his head up the staircase he called out, “Addie, your entire life and everything but the kitchen sink is heading your way.”

“Thanks, dad!”

“What was that about?” I asked after he joined us in the kitchen while the coffee machine churned out our usual drinks. “I thought she outgrew the ‘I’m too cool to hangout with my parents’ phase.”

Pierre's lips pressed together and he took a seat next to Charles, picking up Clare who had left Sydney to return to his practice. “Elias.”

“Vettel?” Charles asked, his eyebrows lifting when Pierre nodded and pushed his mug away so Clare couldn’t reach the hot liquid.

“They have been out on a few dates, apparently. I’ll have to ask Davis about it, assuming he went with them, it’s not like it’s his job or anything. Did you know that?”

I shook my head at the news, cradling my mug in my hands as I leaned against the bench and wondered if she had ditched her bodyguard once again. “He’s a sweet boy from what I remember, much like his father.”

“I don’t like it. I don’t care who his dad is,” Pierre grumbled before repeating, “You are so lucky you only have sons, mate. Teenage girls are stressful.”

“Ah, but I have two boys who think it is funny to have a competition to see who can fart the loudest,” Charles said as he took a sip of his drink.

“I mean, that’s kind of funny,” Pierre said with a smirk.

Charles sighed deeply and rubbed his forehead. “Not when one always pushes too hard to win.”

The sip I was taking went the wrong way and I spluttered as Pierre laughed, “It’s all shits and giggles, until someone giggles and shits.”

“To think my poor mother went through this too. Drives me insane, mate. Bet you’ve never had to worry about that?”

“Thankfully, no,” I answered after recovering from choking on coffee. “But it also wasn’t bad enough to stop you from having another.”

“And on that note, I should get going. Mia won’t let me back in the house if I don’t pick up her favourite carbonara on the way home.” He smiled as he thought of his wife’s pregnancy cravings. It was the same one she had when she was carrying Marc and Antonio so it came as no surprise at the gender reveal when the backyard was splattered with blue confetti. “Thank you for letting me borrow Clare.”

“Any time,” Pierre chuckled as he clapped his friend on the back. Charles had been busy reinstalling all the baby gates and safety locks in his home, despite the baby boy not even being born yet, and wanted a toddler to help test his craftsmanship. “I won’t complain about a little free babysitting.”

Charles placed his empty mug in the sink and before kissing the top of Clare’s thick wavy hair. “Bye petite chérie, I’ll see you on Sunday.”

“Bye Uncle Charles,” she said with a wave, but it sounded more like Unk Cha and made him laugh as he approached the simulator.

I saw Sydney pause the race and Charles crouched down beside him, sharing a few quiet words of encouragement for the upcoming debut race. I couldn’t help feeling incredibly lucky to be surrounded by so many supportive people and my smile grew as a pair of arms wrapped around my waist. 

I turned to meet his lips over my shoulder and the magnetism that attracted us was still evident even after 17 years. Of course, like any relationship, there had been times when stress led to arguments and I would find him hours later in a spare bed, wide awake because he couldn’t sleep without me beside him. Those fights never lasted long enough to even remember what they were about and forgiveness came easy.

I turned in my husband’s arms and draped mine around his neck to admire him. Pierre was truly like a fine wine. Age had made him even more handsome and the small wrinkles at the corners of his lips and eyes were a testament to a life that was full of smiles and laughter. 

“Addie said she’ll watch the kids tonight,” Pierre whispered in my ear as he gently swayed to the melodic tune of his voice and I hummed with contentment. “And I got us a table at L'Ambroisie. You’ve been working so hard I thought we could do with a night away, just the two of us.”

“You think I don’t know your game, baby,” I whispered back, all too aware Charles was still chatting with Sydney and imparting some real world advice. “Wine and dine, pretty words, a hotel room. There’s only one thing you want.”

His lips curled into a smile against my cheek. “You know me too well.”

“You would actually get a full night’s sleep if you put your foot down.”

Pierre looked over at Clare who had helped herself to a banana from the fruit bowl and as if sensing she had been caught she looked up with an innocent smile. “How can I tell her no when she looks like that?”

“Mhmm, and that’s why she keeps climbing into our bed. You are a big softy.”

His smirk was flirty and fun as his arms tightened around me, pulling our bodies flush together. His breath was hot on my neck as he hid his face in the curtain of my hair. “Not tonight, ma femme. Tonight you will see just how hard I can be.”

Pierre backed up with a smirk but not before he sucked at the sensitive skin above my racing pulse. He knew exactly what he was doing and the smugness showed as he whistled a little tune on his way to help Clare peel the banana.

Shaking my head, I made my way to the stairs and said goodbye to Charles with the message to remind Mia that our plans for a spa day had been booked - but that didn’t mean he could slack off from the ankle massages he was giving her each night. He gave an amused salut but I didn’t see it as I pressed the button for the elevator. He was well used to the reminders by now, it wasn’t his first rodeo.

Knowing my evening plans had changed I went to my office and shut the door to silence the music drifting down the hall from Addie’s room. As CEO of Gasly Racing there was an endless stream of paperwork to be checked and signed, especially with the new expansion plan for the factory about to break ground. On top of that were the invites to attend fundraisers or speeches to prepare for the various charities I was ambassador for such as Women's Refuge.

When I finally emerged with my inbox up to date I could hear the laughter of all my children from where they lounged in front of the tv and the sound never ceased to make me smile. I had missed the sound since Addie moved out because it was rare to have all five of us here at the same time and I was reluctant to leave even for just one night when it came time to pack an overnight bag.

“We are allowed one night away, mon amour,” Pierre said as he stepped into the master bedroom to see me hesitating to step inside the wardrobe. “You and me, no interruptions.”

I relaxed into his embrace and sighed as he brushed my hair over one shoulder before kissing my collar. “And what were you planning that was so important it couldn’t be interrupted?”

His chuckle sent a shiver of delight down my spine and his fingers trailed down my ribs to the hem of my shirt before they slipped underneath the material to caress the soft skin over my stomach. I had to take a shaky breath when his thumbs caught the waistband of my skirt and I held it as I waited for them to hook underneath.

His lips brushed the shell of my ear and my lips parted in anticipation of his dirty words. “To sleep.”

“Huh?” I blinked twice, peeking over my shoulder to see his green eyes sparkling with amusement. 

“To sleep. Why, what were you thinking?” He tried to look innocent but when he drew his bottom lip between his teeth and his hand slipped down beneath my skirt he let the truth show. “Did you want me to tell you how I am dying for a taste of you? How I can’t wait to have these sexy legs wrapped around me when I make love to you tonight? I don’t need to tell you, baby, I’ll show you.”

I knew he could feel how damp my panties were for him from the smirk on his face and I almost whimpered when he withdrew his hand from where I needed it. “Now pack your bag, and make it quick, I’m absolutely ravenous.”

I bit my lip at the depth of his tone and knew exactly what it was he was dying to taste. I didn’t even look at what I was packing, tossing the first items that touched my hands before he stopped me and grabbed one dress instead. 

“This one,” he said as he held a colourful sundress that I rarely wore anymore, a soft smile warming his eyes. “It’s my favourite.”

Click here for the final chapter. 🥺

Tagging: @my-only-way-tocooperatewithlife @prrttysposts @alwaysclassyeagle @dr3lover @adalynneva

[wonwoonlight]

everything and more; chapter 1 / choi seungcheol

➝ Seungcheol x single mom!Reader (feat. original characters, Jisoo, Jinyoung, Jeonghan, etc.)

➝ best friends to lovers // single mom!Reader // slowburn // fluff // angst // slice of life-ish

➝ wc: 5.2~k

➝ chapter warning: character death (its literally the plot sjhdfhsjbf), curses, cliche probably lol, not entirely proofread, nothing more that i can think of

➝ everything and more masterlist

[✾✾✾]

You used to say you wanted at least three children growing up.

But then your sister gave birth to one beautiful son, a nephew you love with everything your heart can offer and more, and, after seeing the hardship she went through, you decided motherhood isn't for you. You had never thought motherhood was easy, but seeing someone so close to you going through it was another experience altogether.

The thought of being the aunt that spoils their nephew to no end definitely seems like the better choice. Given, your sister's journey is probably harder than most because the father isn't in the picture and God knows how cruel the world can be to single mothers, especially those out of wedlock.

Still, you had lived with her for the first three months after she gave birth to help her around, and you’re 99% sure (the 1% you keep around just in case your words will bite you back in the ass) you would never be able to care for a child 24/7. Even babysitting during the day was hard, but she had to care for Seungyoon during day and night and you don’t even dare to imagine the amount of patience it took her to do that.

“Seungyoon is… how old now?” Jisoo asks as she bounces your nephew on her lap. You’re on babysitting duty today, as Yuri has a business trip to Suwon and you’ve convinced her to let you babysit Seungyoon. That sister of yours can be too hard headed for her own good when it comes to her son, which you understand to a certain point, but you don’t see why she should bring her toddler son to a business trip when you don’t even have work today and you’re her sister for a reason.

It’s always been you two; three now, with Seungyoon. You don’t have any other family and it’s okay as long as you have each other. You’ve found a lot of family along the way in other people: like Jisoo, your best friend since high school, and Seungcheol, another best friend of yours from university. Not to forget Jinyoung, Yuri’s only and closest friend who’s basically your big brother. You’re happy with this family and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

"He's three next month." You grin as your nephew giggles uncontrollably on Jisoo's lap, the way Seungcheol is poking his belly making his giggle louder by the seconds.

"Already?" Seungcheol exclaims, his mouth turning into a small 'o'. "Wow. Felt like it was just yesterday we visited Yuri after her labor."

"Right?" Jisoo sighs as she hugs the kid closer to her. She has always had a soft spot for him, to the point where she was probably more excited about Seungyoon's birth than you were almost three years ago. "Now this brat can already talk back if we try to make him eat his carrot."

Seungyoon scrunches in distaste at the mention of the vegetable, frowning at Jisoo like she has personally offended him. "Auntie. No carrot."

"Why do you not like carrots though?" Seungcheol intercepts, indulging him.

"Yuck." His frown deepens, followed by a yawn that makes its way out of his small lips. 

"They're good for your eyes, you know." You poke his cheek to gain his attention and, just like that, the little kid turns to you and extends his arms so you'd take him to your lap instead. It's something he often does when his mom isn't around; seeks for your warmth when he's sleepy or uncomfortable. Because you're you and you're always there together with his mom that his mind already registers you as another safe place for him. It's something that Yuri has taught him too, to find you or Uncle Jinyoung if she's not there.

"Sleepy?" You take him into your arms and whisper with a soft kiss on top of his head, the way you endlessly caress his hair lulling him to sleep. "We'll go home in a bit, okay?"

Seungyoon doesn't answer, simply buries his face in your chest as sleep overcomes him bit by bit.

Almost an hour goes by just like that, with the three of you quietly continuing the discussion in the cafe, talking about work and whatnot as your fingers absentmindedly comb through Seungyoon's hair even if he's already asleep at this point.

"Hey, didn't you go on a date or something last week?"

Seungcheol looks at you, nods, then shrugs, not giving any details until Jisoo prods, prods, and prods. You're thankful she does it for you, because you're actually also curious but don't really have the heart to force it out of him.

Seungcheol is a romantic. Has always been particular with the girls he wants to date. If he's not interested, then he wouldn't spare them a glance. If he's only remotely interested, he'd still be skeptical and find a hundred reasons not to agree on a date. There's just something bothersome about going out with someone he doesn't know without anyone else present.

You and Jisoo have been encouraging him to go on dates though, if only because it's been too long and you recognize the longing in his eyes everytime he sees his friends with their partners. He claims he's not currently looking for a relationship, but it's also been quite some time since he even goes out with anyone other than you two, and that's why you've been telling him to be more open at least for the first meetings. If he doesn't want to continue from then, then it's up to him. But how would he find someone–anyone if he doesn't even want to go on the first date?

"It was okay… but, nothing special. She's nice and we have some common interests but…" His gaze falls on Seungyoon on your lap, then caresses his head as if seeking some sort of comfort from the little boy. "Not interested in a second date."

Jisoo is about to argue, probably meaning to convince him to tell more, but her phone rings and she immediately picks up when she sees her fiance's name. Jeonghan rarely calls when she's out with you both, that's a rule they've decided together: to respect the time they spend with their friends. So she knows it must be important if he calls her instead of leaving a text.

You see her panic the longer the call goes, hand already busy packing up her stuff as you barely hear Jeonghan's faint voice calmly speak through the phone. 

"Jeonghan’s sister got into an accident." Jisoo relays the information once he hangs up, voice shaking, and worry floods over you despite not knowing the girl personally. "I… I need to go. She's being taken to the hospital now."

"Want me to drive you?" Seungcheol offers, but Jisoo shakes her head and says she's going home first, that she'll go with Jeonghan because the accident isn't in Seoul and, even if he didn't mention it, she knows he needs her with him.

"Update us?" You try to be calm for her, your palm caresses her arm in comfort.

"I will." She bites her lip in worry, looking at the map on her phone that indicates the location of the taxi she's just ordered. "She's… she's on a trip with her friend and she's supposed to come home today. But there's an accident on Seocho and it's quite a big one because a loading truck caused it."

You blink at the location, the transition between your heart dropping then speeding up as the worst case scenario goes through your mind is a matter of seconds. Yuri would need to go through Seocho too on her way back from Suwon. 

It's only 3PM now. If she's on a business trip, surely she would go home later in the evening, right? Fuck, your phone is in your bag and you can’t take it without waking your nephew. You just had to put it on ‘do not disturb’ too, though you’ve made sure to let it ring if a call goes through.

Your tendency to spiral into worst case scenarios makes it hard to convince yourself everything’s fine because it hasn’t rung. You’re dying to just call Yuri and listen to her calling you dumb for worrying; because she’s okay and she’ll be home in a few hours. That you need to calm down because she promises she’s okay.

Jisoo doesn’t seem to notice the shift in your mood due to her own stress, but Seungcheol does and he doesn’t address it until Jisoo bids you two goodbye along with a soft kiss on Seungyoon’s head. He shifts closer to you, his palm reaching your shoulder before he asks if you’re okay.

“Can you get my phone, please?” You say instead, the tremble in your voice worries him. He goes through your bag like you ask him to, then hands you the device as he notices the way your arm tightens around Seungyoon.

You’re so tense that he almost reminds you to breathe, he sees you scroll but it seems like you find nothing by the way you’re biting your lip. Then he sees you type, another sigh escapes your lips as you anxiously stare at your screen. Before he can ask if something’s wrong, you bring your phone to your ear, an endless ring greeting your ear because whoever you’re calling isn’t picking up.

“Okay, talk to me.” Seungcheol finally says, his voice soft but firm. The way you’re looking at him isn’t helping at all, and he sees you gripping your phone like it has personally wronged you. “What’s wrong?”

“Yuri is in Suwon.”

“Okay?”

“She–she’d need to go through Seocho to go back to Seoul, right?” He nods, finally grasping your worry. “She’s not replying to my texts nor my calls and I’m–I don’t know, I’m freaking out.”

He doesn’t want to brush off your worries, because he knows how much Yuri means to you and he understands how your train of thoughts might’ve gone in the short span of time between Jisoo’s news and your current condition. But he’s not sure how to calm you down without sounding like he’s downplaying your worries; so he takes the one route that he knows would at least remind you that you need to get it together.

“Hey. Breathe, okay? You’ll wake Seungyoon up.” He whispers like it’s a secret, and you take a long, deep breath as you nod. Seungcheol has always had that effect on you; to make you calm down and be your pillar when you need someone to be. Jisoo is a little blunt and harsh at times, another type of friend you’re glad you have in life because you definitely need someone like her to knock senses into your head. But that means you don’t always go to her when you’re looking for comfort and validation. That role is Seungcheol’s and, while he can be strict at times, he’s better at sympathizing with your feelings (or everyone else’s, really) than anyone. “Maybe Yuri’s in a meeting and she’s not with her phone?”

He’s probably right, but the feeling inside your gut is starting to root deeper and deeper within you the more time passes by, it’s ugly and it’s unpleasant. Like you can feel something is going entirely wrong though you can’t tell if you’re making things up or not at this point. You try to find comfort in Seungyoon’s sleeping form, his cheek pressed against your shoulder and his arms limp on his sides. 

It works along with the deep breath Seungcheol reminds you once again to take, and when your phone does ring thirty minutes later, it’s Seungcheol who takes it because Seungyoon squirms in your arms at the sudden noise.

It’s an unknown number, but the way his jaw tenses at whatever he’s hearing is making your heart twist with worry. You can’t even try to understand what they’re saying, because Seungcheol doesn’t say anything but ‘yes’, but it must be important if he’s still listening, and the last thing you heard before he hangs up is not a sentence you wish to hear in midst of your worry. We’ll be there as soon as possible. Thank you for informing us.

The way he looks at you makes your throat tightens, you can probably feel dread at the tip of your tongue. You hold Seungyoon tighter for the sake of your sanity, the toddler has fallen back to sleep. When Seungcheol speaks, your eyes blur with tears and you hate the way you already know what he’s saying before he even finishes his sentence.

The one time you wish you were wrong, you just have to be right.

“Yuri’s in the hospital. She’s in the ICU and we need to get there immediately.”

You’re trying your best not to bawl on your way there, thankful for Seungcheol as he drives as fast as he’s allowed to, Seungyoon no longer asleep but cluelessly plays with your hair as he obediently stays on your lap. It’s like he knows you’re not okay, knows not to throw a tantrum and not to ask to sit by himself at the back like he usually would. 

Like he knows you need him with you to keep you sane.

Seungcheol looks calm, but the way his palm grips yours obviously indicates otherwise and you try to distract yourself from all the worst possibilities in your mind by thinking of how lucky you are to have him with you of all people. You know he’s worried out of his mind too, but he still takes your hand because he knows you need it, knows that it helps to keep you grounded even if you have your nephew on your lap.

It doesn’t last for long though, and you don’t know what to think of Seungcheol’s lack of explanation. Yes, he confirmed that Yuri is also involved in the same accident as Jeonghan’s sister, but he didn’t say anything else. But does he really need to when he’s already said Yuri is in the ICU? If she had been okay, she would be in the ER at most; but they felt the need to take her to the ICU and that must be saying something.

Did the speaker not say anything to him? Or does he simply not want to give you empty hopes?

“Hey.” His voice brings you out of your trance and you squeeze his hand out of reflex. “I’ll be here, okay?”

You tear up again and nod, your arm that’s around your nephew tightens.

Seungyoon shifts at this, buries himself in your neck and wraps his arms around your neck like he knows you need it more than you do.

[✾✾✾]

Jinyoung is already there when you arrive, and he hugs you tight like he’s preparing you for bad news, like he needs to calm you down because whatever follows after isn’t going to be pleasant.

Seungyoon is in Seungcheol’s arms, breaking the older man’s heart by asking why they’re in the doctor’s place over and over again. Seungcheol assures him he’s not going to get shot when the toddler almost cries saying he doesn’t want to see the doctor today, promises to buy him ice cream later on if he doesn’t cry and stays in his arms.

“Is… is it bad?” You manage to choke between your tears. Jinyoung is rarely unkept, but he’s disheveled and if he’s like this then you don’t know if you want to hear what he has to say. You’re sure the doctor has filled him in on something, Jinyoung is registered as both your and Yuri’s emergency contact and if he’s here before you do, they must have told him something.

He takes a few moments to compose himself and arranges his words, his hands holding yours like it’s his lifeline.

“They aren’t sure she’s going to make it.”

More tears spill out of your eyes, though you try to contain your sob because Seungyoon is right behind you with Seungcheol, though when Jinyoung gives your friend a look, he’s quick to take Seungyoon somewhere out of sight so you can finally cry, cry, and cry until your tears dry out.

Yuri might not make it. You swallow the words like needles between your throat, your lips trembling as you stubbornly try to contain your despair. But when Jinyoung pulls you once again into his chest and whispers words of comfort you wish you could tell Yuri who’s by herself in the operating room, the dam breaks and you grip the front of his shirt like it’s the only thing you know how to do.

You don’t want to think of the worst case scenario. Don’t want to think of a life without your sister. But how can you not when you’ve been there in front of the OR for two hours? How can you not when your consciousness is going in and out of your head and the only thing that reminds you you’re awake is Seungcheol’s soft breath and the steady pattern of his heartbeat?

“Drink something?” He asks, his voice hesitant. You haven’t talked at all since Jinyoung told you Yuri might not make it, and you’re thankful Seungcheol doesn’t force you to either when he comes back with your nephew in tow. Jinyoung fills him in quickly between whispers before taking the kid with him and Seungcheol doesn’t waste a second to hold you because you look like you’re seconds away from fainting.

You shake your head even though your throat is dry and you honestly feel like you’re about to pass out any moment now. The only thing that’s keeping you here right now is Seungcheol: he’s basically plastered to you and he refuses to let go of you since earlier, which you appreciate so much because you don’t know if you even have it in you to sit straight without him by your side. You’ve just been spacing out in his embrace for two hours straight, his arm around you and your forehead on the juncture of his neck.

“Mommy?” Seungyoon’s voice brings you out of your trace, and you find him with Jinyoung, though the boy immediately lets go of his hand once he sees the state you’re in. Seungyoon only calls you that when he thinks you’re sad, a nickname that Yuri has always encouraged him for because even if he doesn’t have a father, she makes sure to let him know that he has two mothers who would do everything for him and you’re one of them.

He calls Yuri Mama, and he usually calls you ‘Mi’ because it’s easier than ‘Mommy’. He very rarely calls you by the latter because no one refers to you as such and he’s not used to it most of the time. But he knows you usually smile when he does it, which is why he only calls you that way when he thinks you’re upset. 

“Mommy okay?” He climbs into your lap, making your eyes water once again. God, this precious child might lose his own mother and he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know a thing and you pray once again to every deity in existence that you wouldn’t need to tell Seungyoon he wouldn’t be able to see his mom again.

He frowns when you don’t giggle like you usually would, though you do force a smile as you pull him into a hug.

“I’m sorry I left you with Uncle Jinyoung.” You say instead, not wanting to lie to the kid when you’re obviously not okay. “He’s boring, isn’t he?”

His small giggle warms you a little, but then he shakes his head and tells you Uncle Jinyoung is fun today and he buys him food earlier. You hum as he continues to blabber, mouthing a ‘thank you’ to Jinyoung when he catches your eyes.

“Yoon, will you tell Mi to drink water?” Seungcheol hands the bottle to your nephew, knowing full well you can’t resist him. You pretend to glare at him, aware that Seungcheol knows how grateful you are with him by your side. Seungcheol has just texted Jisoo that you’re both in the hospital for Yuri, and she promises she’ll drop by as soon as possible after informing him that thankfully Jeonghan’s sister is okay even though she has a minor concussion.

“Mi, water.” He repeats after the older man, his hands can barely hold the water bottle straight.

You thank him as you take a gulp, only now realizing how thirsty you actually are. Seungyoon shifts to play with your hair, still blissfully unaware why you’re all in the hospital, though he’s just happy in his bubble to be surrounded by you and his uncles.

For a second, you let a little bit of hope pass through you. You hope it can stay peaceful like this, with Seungyoon in your arms as you pretend you’re waiting for Yuri to come home.

Yeah, you’re waiting for her to come out, aren’t you?

Right–you’re so going to give her hell for all the worry and tears she made you shed. For making you lose it in front of Seungyoon and making you cry in front of Jinyoung, of all people. Yuri is in for a lot of nagging once she wakes up. Sick or not, you’re still going to scream at her and you’re going to hug her tight because it doesn’t make sense how deep the dread she makes you feel right now.

Yeah, that’s what you’re going to do.

She’s going to make it. She might not wake up immediately after the surgery, but you’re going to do all that when she wakes up and–

Min Yuri’s family?

And you’re going to lock her in a headlock like you usually would when she’s being annoying–

We’re sorry…

And you’re going to bawl into her chest like you used to when you were six–

…tried out best… 

And she’s going to laugh at you because she never knows what to do when you cry–

…too weak and…

But she’ll still hug you back because that’s what sisters are for–

…we’re sorry.

Because you only have each other.

Only have each other.

Had each other.

Your eyes get more and more blurry by the seconds, everything came crashing all over your body from head to toe, it’s getting harder to breathe, someone is holding you and—

You don’t know what happened after.

[✾✾✾]

On your eighteenth birthday, Yuri gave you a silver band and said you’re not allowed to take it off unless someone she approved of proposed. That you’re only allowed to take it off on your wedding day where she’d definitely be your maid of honor because who else would?

It’s a promise that I’ll be with you until I’m sure someone else will take care of you as well as I do.

You have never taken off your ring since then, never had any intention to, either. But now that you stare at it as you pack her belongings in her place, you want nothing but to rip it off your finger like it burns.

Didn’t she promise to be with you until then?

Didn’t she promise to make sure that whoever’s going to marry you is worthy of taking her ring off for?

Didn’t she fucking promise you she wouldn’t leave you behind like your parents did?

“Hey. Maybe it’s time to rest?” You look up at Seungcheol who’s hovering on the door. He looks only a little better than you are, but who can blame him when he hasn’t gone home at all since that day in the hospital? He’s been with you since then; Jisoo and Jinyoung take turns going back and forth, even Jeonghan stays for a bit when he has the time. 

Seungcheol was with you when you spent that night in the hospital, when you cried next to Yuri’s body before they closed the coffin, when you went home with Seungyoon to your place because you couldn’t bear to go to Yuri’s place just yet, and now, when you finally gathered the courage to go to her place and pack her stuff because who else will?

“Don’t you have work?” You ask instead, feeling bad that he’s been with you basically 24/7 the past week.

“You know my work allows me to work from anywhere.” He smiles a little before taking the seat next to you on the floor. “Let’s get lunch? Seungyoon says he wants jjajangmyeon.”

Seungyoon. Your poor child. You don’t think he really understands what’s happening. Jinyoung had kindly taken over your role to relay the information to the kid, but he had simply asked if his mom was going somewhere when Jinyoung said he wouldn’t be able to see her anymore.

You’re sure he would’ve cried seeing you bawl if not for Seungcheol quickly pulling you with him and holding you in his arms as you tried your best to block your sob, barely making out the conversation between the two.

Mama is in heaven now.

“Is it nice?”

Hmm. The best. But you won’t be able to see her anymore.

“Even if I miss her?”

Yes. It’s too far and if she has to come here, she’ll get very tired and might even get sick. We don’t want that, right?

“But what if I want see Mama?”

Then you’ll have to wait until the sky turns dark and the stars are visible. Mama is one of the stars now. Is that okay?

“But… there are so many…”

Seungyoon is smart, though. Aren’t you?

“Hmm..”

Then I’m sure you’ll know which one is Mama?

“Mmm… Want Mommy… Where’s Mommy?”

“Mommy?” Seungyoon has been calling you that often now. You’re not sure if he’s simply too confused or if it’s because you’ve been looking too upset these days, but his small voice always makes your heart clenches in the most painful way possible because it sounds like he knows he can’t call his own mom anymore. It’s getting harder and harder to hear him call you anything of the sort because it reminds you that his Mama is no longer around. “Hungry.”

Jisoo looks at you in apology from the door. She’s been with Seungyoon earlier, telling him they have to pack his toys because he’ll be moving with you and no longer live there. The boy has been more quiet these days, and you feel bad because you think he’s quiet because he’s tired and he doesn’t know what’s happening; why you barely talk and why his mom is not here.

“Uncle Cheol said you want jjajangmyeon?” You say as you take him in your arms, the boy suddenly shy as he nods and buries himself in your neck. “Do you want to eat outside or here?”

“Out okay?” he asks, almost hesitant. Then continues to make your heart hurt when he says his next words. “Mommy always inside these days…”

“Oh, baby.” You bite your lip and murmur an apology against his forehead. The way you hug him is more for you then it is for Seungyoon, but he tightens his arms around you also and asks once again if it’s okay to eat outside. “We can. Let’s go with Uncle Cheol and Auntie Choo, yeah?”

Seungcheol opts to go to the jjajangmyeon place you used to go to during university instead of the one nearby. It takes almost an hour to get there, but he thinks you need it and he’s sure the owner of the jjajangmyeon place near Yuri’s apartment would definitely be asking about her–which you definitely don’t need.

It’s been quite some time since Seungyoon went anywhere too, so he figures he could at least give that to the kid.

“Been some time since we went here, huh?” It really has. The last time was probably a year ago or something, because life gets in the way and even though you’ve been saying you wanted to come here again, the both of you are always too lazy and the university seems too far away even if it’s not really.

Still, the owner recognizes you two and happily takes your order which hasn't changed since the time you were in university.

Apparently, the old lady hasn’t changed either, because her eyes sparkle with interest as she sees Seungyoon in your arms. You dread her question already, knowing what she’d ask before she even does.

But as much as you expected her words, nothing prepared you for her whole sentences.

“Oh my. Is this your kid? He looks so much like you. I knew you two would get married one day.” She says as she addresses you and Seungcheol, way too excited to notice the horrified look you share with your best friend, nor Jisoo who’s trying her best not to laugh at the sudden turn of events.

You don’t even get the chance to deny her statement, because she already turns back to the kitchen then returns just as quick, giving Seungyoon a pack of jelly that’s supposedly her grandson’s.

“What a nice kid.” She smiles at Seungyoon who thanks her with a cheeky smile, the boy clutches the jelly like you’d take it any moment now. “My grandson used to cry all the time at his age. What a nice mom you have, hmm? She’s brought you up really well.”

“Mommy the best.” Seungyoon replies cheekily, which concludes the conversation because that seems to be enough for the owner to leave your table.

Once again, you’re thankful Seungcheol is beside you as you exhale a deep breath and try to swallow your tears on his shoulder. This is just a taste of what you’d need to deal with more in the future; people mistaking you as Seungyoon’s mom and you’ll somehow get the credit for everything Yuri did to make sure Seungyoon grew up well.

It’s not fair.

Nothing is and you hate that there’s nothing you can do about it.

“Mommy?” Seungyoon tugs softly on your hair to catch your attention. “Feed me?”

You tear up again at this, because Seungyoon has actually been insisting on eating by himself the past few months, saying he’s a big boy and that he can manage eating by himself. Does he know? That you need him to depend on you? That you need something to distract you?

“Want Mommy to feed me.” He repeats, his voice faltering at your lack of response. How long have you been neglecting him? How selfish can you be, drowning in your own sorrow like Seungyoon hasn’t lost his own mother? He’s probably even more lost than you are, with Yuri gone and you disassociating for a whole week.

You’re lucky Seungyoon has always been a nice kid, that he simply accepts that his aunt and uncles were to take care of him for the week. 

How fucking selfish can you be? 

“Yeah.” You square your shoulder and drop a kiss on his head. It’s not only you that needs him, you remind yourself. Seungyoon also needs you and you’re going to give everything you have and more if it means he’s happy and healthy. “Mommy will feed you, okay?”

[✾✾✾]

A/N: i hope you enjoyed this aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa pls do send me your thoughts and feedbacks through ask or anything bc i'm still a writer that needs ur words to continue writing lol<3

series taglist: @cheolctrl @nap-of-a-starr @shiningstar-byulxx @itsveronicaxxx @shuahoshiscoups

➝ taglist is open, pls send me an ask instead of replying to the post so it's easier to keep track of the taglist!

[I don’t allow any reposting or translation, so please do tell me if you find anyone reposting my works. You can only find me on tumblr or my Ao3. –wonwoonlight.]

[violetganache42]

Ooooh, boy. This has been an announcement I have been dying to share for almost a year now, and I think this is the perfect time to make it because I'm not joking when I say this:

I'M GOING TO LAS VEGAS AND CALIFORNIA FOR THE FIRST TIME!

Okay, so there is a funny story on how that happened. One day during the spring last year, Mom was looking at dates for us to go see Garth Brooks in concert again and saw that he currently has concert residency in Las Vegas. Despite the initial debate on whether we should go or not considering the huge distance between there and our home, she ultimately bought the tickets for it because we've never been to Vegas before. And that's just only the beginning. lol

Later that same year, during the summer, Mom and I were running errands and talking about our upcoming trip to Vegas. She mentioned how this was gonna be the closest she'll be to California; it's her birth state and the last time she was there was a few decades ago, so she couldn't not go visit there again. Not even a second later, I simply replied, "✨Disneyland~.✨" Pizazz and all. XD She immediately said that she didn't even think of that at all, which had me laughing, and it quickly led to our trip becoming full-fledged family vacation plans. The planning was a gradual process because at the time, we were more focused on our second Orlando vacation in September and me staying with my older sister in Milwaukee from late December to mid-January while Mom was in London and Paris. With all of that out of the way, we've been finalizing our Las Vegas and California plans for the past few months; now, I can officially say we'll be on vacation from Apr. 24 to May 4.

I still cannot believe this is actually happening! I never thought I would end up going to the other side of the country for anything. And lemme tell you, there are a number of things I am already looking forward to checking out: the sights of Las Vegas, the Grand Canyon, going to Toontown and Super Nintendo World, possibly visiting Mom's birth town! I am super excited!

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

From the Ashes Pt. 29

Pairing(s): Pairing(s): Rhaegar Targaryen x Lannister!Reader, one-sided!Jaime Lannister x Lannister!Reader, Jaime Lannister x Cersei Lannister

Warnings: slow burn fic, changing povs, Tywin/Cersei POV

Words: 3065

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 3.5  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35

Book Two of Dārilaros hen ōrbar se perzys (Heir of Ash and Fire)

Out in the training yard an eight year-old Aerys Targaryen and a ten year-old Tywin Lannister commence their swinging of swords. Tywin went easy on the young prince as he was also trying to display form to an even younger six year-old Steffon Baratheon, Prince Aerys’ cousin. The little page watched entranced and listened to every word that Tywin told him. Admiration kept his attention pierced on the older boy. Even though Tywin was King Aegon’s page, the king allowed him to play with them. It felt good to still be able to feel like a child. Tywin had always been a serious one and only got out of his shell when he was with Aerys and Steffon. He hadn’t seen his own brothers in quite some time so he unconsciously adopted the two.

Steffon claps, thick black hair that had the tendency to get leaves stuck in it. “I want to try!”

Aerys chuckled as if he knew all there was to the world. “You are too young. Perhaps in another year or so.”

“Watching is good enough for you right now. Watch and learn.” agreed Tywin, going to ruffle his prince’s silver-blonde hair.

Violet eyes glanced up at him. Once upon a time, Tywin would have fought for him; maybe would have even died for him. Once upon a time, Aerys had even been Tywin’s brother in arms.

Now he hardly recognized the man that people call the Mad King. He was a complete stranger now who had cut off all ties to those that had once loved him dearly before the Targaryen madness ate away at his brain. The gods always flipped a coin when a Targaryen was born; unfortunately for Aerys, it landed on the wrong side. Tywin could still remember a time when Aerys had been normal and even slightly charming. That was the prince he had grown up with. Hot-tempered, he had always been, but back in those days Aerys had been the most generous person Tywin had known. A tragedy really how things ended up. Now Tywin hated to recall those happy memories of Aerys dancing during events with a carefree grin. If he allowed such a thought to continue to plague him, he would grow morose. The lord of Casterly Rock couldn’t afford such emotions. There were more important things to take care of then remembering times long ago.

Since the disappearance of Tyrion though, young Aerys’ laughter was starting to come back to him. Tyrion had had no friends close like Aerys and Steffan had been to him. The boy had no chance. When he was first told that Tyrion was missing, part of Tywin thought it a blessing. Tywin dreaded looking upon his deformed son’s face. Such a face didn’t deserve the name of Lannister, yet Joanna had given birth to him. He was a part of her as much as the Western Warden hated to admit it. It was like Joanna was still alive in some way, reminding Tywin to be kind to Tyrion. That’s what she would have wanted. His darling Joanna. The children that had destroyed her health so much were the ones he knew she loved the most. If she had lived. . . Most certainly Joanna would have adored Tyrion. That was how beautiful her heart was. She would have been so proud how smart he was and how eloquent his speech pattern as he already talked like a little lord. A little lord that he would never truly be.

Drifting thoughts lead him to Jaime.

Jaime.

That boy always did whatever he pleased despite his father’s wishes. Where had Jaime gone? A small part of Tywin had hoped that perhaps the Kingsguard would straighten his son out, make him develop some morals to live by. It had only made Jaime more cocky than he had already been.

Now he was left with only. . .

“My lord.”

The steward held out a rolled up piece of parchment. “A raven from the Red Keep has delivered this message. . .” There was uncertainty in the quiver of his voice. What insults were written inside?

Tywin unfurled the parchment with his fingers and reads. The steward waited for further instruction from his lord. Poor boy jumped when Tywin, the normally stoic lord with a cold demeanor, made the closest sound to a laugh that he had ever heard him make. Rumor was that only the late Lady Joanna was able to genuinely make her husband laugh. And that had been but three times in public.

He covers it easily with his hand. Pale green eyes flick to the young boy who had been patiently waiting. “Tell my brother that I request his presence.” Gaze returns to the dried ink. It was Aerys’ own handwriting, although a bit illegible. The lines and curves of his words were shaky from the king’s hand tremors that he now suffered from. How dare Aerys’ have the audacity to demand of Tywin help in defeating his own son. After all the king had done to him, now he demanded his former Hand send an army to protect King’s Landing. At least the last missive that he had received from the capital had been more of a request. Tywin knew though that his army would not really be protecting King’s Landing, but King Aerys. The king must now have realized that he was not as indestructible as he had previously thought. Rhaegar had defeated the troop the king had sent after setting wildfire loose near Tumbleton and the Blackwater Rush river. It had stalled Rhaegar for months. Even worse was the news of the former Lord of Winterfell and his son. Brandon and Rickard Stark had been burned alive. Maybe the news of the northern troops retreating back to their lands had made Aerys cocky enough to try and eliminate Rhaegar then and there. He forgot the raw power of Robert Baratheon of Storm’s End and the wild fighting skills of the Dornish. Onlookers of the battle said it was finished within three hours.

And now King Aerys’ was tipping over the edge, spiraling quickly down to his own demise. Soon he would hit the ground with a splat. He could sense even now those that had once swore fealty to him were moving to Rhaegar's side. After the stunt with wildfire, even those who benefitted from his reign were now drawing back. Not helping matters, since the land near King's Landing was scorched and untraveable, no goods could be transferred in or out of the capitol. People would soon begin to starve.

He had done much to humiliate and insult Tywin, a man who would have done anything for him when they were kids. Aerys had made a vulgar rumor about taking Joanna’s virginity before Tywin. Accepted Jaime into the King’s Guard, forbidding him from marriage and from becoming the next Lord of Casterly Rock. Worst of all, Aerys had orchestrated the marriage between Rhaegar and (y/n).

That had been the end of everything. The death of any kind of attachment that Tywin may have had left for Aerys.

“You no longer want her to be a queen? But you have been talking about your dreams of (y/n) becoming a queen when she grew up.” Tywin reminded his wife who had been acting strange for the past few days. Worry made her already pale face ashen. When she looked upon (y/n) who was but four years old, Joanna’s eyes would grow red with tears that wanted freedom.

Tears filled her eyes making her turn away from her husband. She knew how silly it was when she said these things out loud. Joanna didn’t know what else to do but confide in Tywin who was the best confidant she had ever known. Always grounded, Joanna had wanted Tywin to tell her that these were all just silly dreams that meant nothing. They had originally made her feel great joy. Dreaming of her daughter becoming a regal queen. Not the daughter Tywin had expected, but the one that had nearly died at birth. Unlike Cersei’s great beauty, there was nothing extraordinary about (y/n). She was a basic child but she did have the tendency to hide any wounds she may have acquired during play or when she experienced one of her “accidents” which Joanna knew Cersei had to be involved in.“I know. But if she becomes queen. . . oh Tywin. I know all of this sounds strange to you. The dreams I’ve had. . . they can’t just be random.”

Tywin didn’t like entertaining dreams. But he loved Joanna and it ached to see her so scared. “What will happen if she becomes queen?”

Joanna shakes her head. “No, she will. And that will be the beginning of the end for her. . .”

That’s all they had been: silly dreams. (y/n) hadn’t even made it to becoming queen. She was still a princess when she died in the tower fire, but not a queen. Thinking of it put a stone in his chest. At least now mother and daughter were reunited in the afterlife. That gave Tywin a bit of comfort.

A brief knock and his study door opens to reveal his younger brother Kevan. Clean cut with magnificent scarlet clothes, Kevan bows to his brother whom he revered highly.

“You called?”

“Sit and read this.”

Obediently Kevan does so. Thick heavy brows crinkle in the middle as he advances in the letter. The slight trembling of his hand told Tywin that he thought this equally ridiculous. He reads a part out loud:

“Failure to attend to the Ruler of the Seven Kingdoms will result in a siege of your estates and the stripping of your title.”

His face was red with indignation. Kevan looks up at his older brother. “Is this real? He can’t possibly think this would make you take action. . .”

“Threats are all he knows now. He fails to remember that threats such as this don’t work on me.” Tywin smoothly replies but pleased that his brother’s reaction aligned with his.

“What will you do? Has the time come to send our men out to Rhaegar Targaryen?”

Leaning forward on his elbows, Tywin regards his brother. What had he told Cersei?

Caution.

When playing the game, one had to act cautiously. Don’t throw yourself head first into battle.

“Tell our men to be prepared for travel at any moment.” Tywin riffles through his desk drawers before placing a piece of parchment on the surface. His ink pen, he began t0 write in scratchy letters. “And tell Cersei to come to my studies.”

Kevan nods yet hesitates when he was supposed to leave. “Forgive me for speaking out of term, but what about Tyrion?”

“What about Tyrion?”

“He’s still missing. Would you like me to send some men to search the surrounding area of Lannisport? He couldn’t have possibly gotten far and I don’t believe we’ve searched there yet. He could be hiding out in an inn, unbeknownst to anyone. He’s small and cunning. I wouldn’t put it past Tyrion to smooth talk his way in.” Tywin’s younger brother had always had a soft spot for his dwarf nephew.

His hand pauses mid-stroke. There was a slim chance that Tyrion was still alive. It had already been a month since he had escaped Casterly Rock. When his septa had informed Tywin that she could not find the young boy anywhere, Tywin had sent out a customary search party. No one found any sign of the boy having passed through.

As if Joanna’s ghost was looming over him with disapproval in her spectre gaze, Tywin sighed. “If you must.” He knew if Tyrion didn’t want to be found then he wouldn’t. All the misfortunes the young boy had faced did nothing to dull his mind. Tyrion from a very young age proved to be incredibly astute, far more than Jaime had been at the same age. If only things had been different. There was no way that Tywin could allow Tyrion to take his title, no matter how smart the boy was. No one would respect him because of his deformity. He could potentially turn into another soft ruler, much like Tywin’s own father Tytos. And Casterly Rock could not survive another Tytos.

Tywin went back to writing, ears waiting for the closing of his study door.

Cersei’s stomach was twisted with knots. She didn’t like the feeling.

No word from the darkin. Absolutely nothing to show that he had finished the deed. What if what she had seen had been wrong? But how could she deny witnessing herself the tall man blending into the shadows before completely disappearing. He wasn’t a fake, that was certain. Certainly Inniros Orelelion would want to get this task over and done with to receive the other half of his payment. It had been quite some time since the two met, surely a man of his pedigree could easily kill someone like (y/n). Unless Jaime was protecting her, which Cersei had a high suspicion of. Even Jaime was no match for a darkin.

All she could do was pace the courtyard, unable to burn off the uneasy feeling that something wasn’t right. Something had gone wrong if the darkin hadn’t returned. Jaime couldn’t have possibly killed Inniros. Cersei worshipped her brother’s fighting skills. There was no one in the world like Jaime. His sword was an extension of his arm. He was still a regular mortal though.

Then she stopped, another chilling thought: what if Inniros had accidentally killed Jaime?

She gripped at the lacing of her front bodice.

What if in protecting (y/n), that pathetic creature, Jaime had died fighting Inniros?

If Jaime was dead, surely she would have sensed something through their bond as twins.

The thought lingered though and made it difficult to breathe in any fresh air that might soothe her frantic mind.

Her father had requested her presence. She had to compose herself. And compose herself she did. Taking a deep breath despite the constriction she felt inside, she went back inside the castle. The winds from the sea tried to pull her back out, tugging gently on her blond hair as it swept by.

“Sit.” Her father instructed once she stepped in, his head tilted down as he continued to scribble something important she surmised by the furrow of his brow.

Cersei wants to look at the parchment, see what has caused her father such an expression. From her angle she was unable to see anything except Tywin’s speedy hand moving from line to line of his letter. The hair on top of his head was thinning badly opposed to the thick gold sideburns that framed his jaw. His long face held no youth, having been bled of it years ago. Joanna had loved to run her hand along the length of Tywin’s face, brushing her fingertips against his sideburns made him melt against her. What had she seen in this cold and callous man to make her fall in love? True it had been an arranged marriage, but no one could deny that Tywin and Joanna were genuinely head over heels in love with one another. It made sense that Tywin would succumb to the beauty of Joanna, but what made Joanna love this gnarled lion? She would never know.

“I have been told we are short in our vaults. Someone has been stealing from me.”

Steady green eyes hold her father’s gaze.

“Do you have an idea who it might be?”

“How would I know? I have no need to go to the vaults.” Her reply rolled off of her tongue easily. Lying had become second nature to Cersei. And she was quite good at it. She got better and better at lying the older she got. The trick was convincing yourself that what you said was true. Most people would let their conscience get the best of them and crumble under their resolve. Cersei was made of stronger stuff. “Is this all you called me in for father?” She stood to leave but the door opened suddenly revealing two men in Casterly Rock armor. Panic was not allowed inside of her. She squared up these men then turned to Tywin.

His eyes haven’t left her. “Your maid has told us otherwise, Cersei. What would you need all that gold for?”

That stupid wench.

Acid rose in her and she wanted to rip that maid’s throat open for snitching on her. “As I have told you, I didn’t go to the vaults. She must be mistaken. And even if I did, that gold is Lannsister gold. Are I not a Lannister? Do I not have a right to it?”

The low creak of his chair as he stands sends a flutter of wariness in her chest. “That’s precisely it my dear. You won’t be considered a Lannister for much longer.” he motions for the men to step closer. Cersei takes two steps back. She was starting to feel cornered. “Which is why I’m sending you to Dorne to get acclimated to your new family and customs.

There was a silence before the storm made Cersei’s face redden. “I will not go.”

Tywin raised an eyebrow. “It’s not up to you, Cersei.”

The two knights were closing in on her. “I will not go to Dorne, father.” Her voice was trembling with hostility. She felt her eyes wildly searching everywhere in Tywin’s study for a way out, something that would help her. There was no Jaime to tell Tywin that Cersei should stay.

Cersei narrows her eyes at Tywin. “I’m not going! You can’t treat me like. . . Like I’m (y/n)!” Hands were clamping down on her shoulder and arm, now she was thrashing. Her full fury took over her. “You can’t treat me like I’m (y/n) father!!”

It was most unbefitting to watch his normally prim and proper daughter become unhinged. Emotionless, Tywin stands right in front of her. “Oh Cersei. What had I told you? Caution. Watch where you step when you play this game with me, Cersei. And at least your sister was able to make herself into a princess all on her own.”

That comment sent Cersei screaming as the knights dragged her away.

She would have been queen had it not been for (y/n).

Taglist:

@boywivlove

@esposadomd

@domoron

@yentroucnagol

@enchantingcupcakecollectionfan

@bregarc

[modestvm]

PENNY, 24, GMT; SHE/HER. | if you’re hearing VIENNA by BILLY JOEL playing, you have to know GABRIEL MOORE (HE/HIM; CIS MAN) is near by! the THIRTY-FOUR year old HISTORY PROFESSOR has been in denver for, like, THREE YEARS. they’re known to be quite OBSTINATE, but being ALLOCENTRIC seems to balance that out. or maybe it’s the fact that they resemble JACOB ANDERSON. personally, i’d love to know more about them seeing as how they’ve got those WANDERING EMPTY MUSEUMS, THE GLOW FROM A LAPTOP SCREEN and ROLLED-UP SHIRT SLEEVES AND V-NECK JUMPERS vibes. and maybe i’ll get my chance if i hang out around the DOWNTOWN DISTRICT long enough! 

full name: gabriel isaac moore. nicknames: gabe, abe. gender and pronouns: cis man, he/him. age: thirty-four. sexuality: bisexual. date of birth: july 15th. zodiac sign: cancer ( loyal, creative, sensitive, insecure. ) place of birth:  bristol, england. occupation: assistant professor of history, university of denver.

born and raised in bristol, the youngest of three with two older sisters. as a diplomatic service officer their father was away more often than not, so gabe was raised by his mother and sisters.

his interest in writing, reading and history was a curveball. aside from his father, the rest of the family's interests were firmly rooted in stem. they were ( perhaps justifiably ) worried that gabriel's interests would not give him much success in life. but he was determined to pursue his passion and after graduating top of his class at bristol uni for undergrad, went on to get his master's and phd in history at st andrew's.

moved to london after graduation wondering what to do with himself and fell into teaching. completed his teaching qual and sought out a role teaching history whilst continuing to research and publish occasionally on the side to keep up with developments in the academic world.

( tw: car accident, injury, depression & ptsd ) was cycling to work as per usual one day when he was hit by a drunk driver at a crossing. he woke up just short of a week later to a shock. gabe had been lucky, really. at least, that's what everyone said -- at the time he couldn't only think that was a cruel thing to say. his right leg had been amputated, originally below the knee but complications did not go his way and so shortly after he became an above knee amputee. otherwise, he was pretty much unscathed - scars here and there the only thing to show of his ordeal now.

slightly reeling and with nothing to really do during his recovery, gabriel turned back to the work he loved. this was something of a relief to friends and family as, not unexpectedly, gabe was diagnosed with ptsd and depression immediately following the accident and suffered during much of his recovery. by no means have either of those things become a non-issue in his life, but they have dissipated and significantly and well, when all else fails… there’s always throwing yourself into work or looking after someone else. he wrote a monograph, a social history of black africans in renaissance england that was eventually published just under five years ago now.

riding on the back of the book's success, a desire to return to academia and for a change of scenery he began applying for jobs. the offer from the university of denver came through and he took it and uprooted to denver. this was where his family’s relief was dampened; they thought it was a rash decision ( they weren’t wrong, but gabe was never one to change his mind once it was set and they knew it ) 

gabe has been in denver for three years now, comfortable in his position at the university but also keen to engage with as many people as possible. he runs a sort of 'history 101' evening class at the community college for anyone to attend.

wanted connections page ! gimme literally everything pls.

[gildcdglory]

APPLICATION.

*     ◟    :    〔   adria arjona  , demi woman    +   she/they    〕      juliana león,  some say you’re a thirty-two-year-old lost soul among the neon lights. known for being kind-hearted and naive, one can’t help but think of soft to be strong by MARINA when you walk by. are you still a medic at the executioners and a nurse at media + medical community, even with your reputation as the lamb? i think we’ll be seeing more of a tired smile after a long day’s work, the scent of floral perfume lingering in the air, and laugher brightening up an otherwise empty alleyway although we can’t help but think of ted lasso from ted lasso, snow white from snow white and mary margaret blanchard from once upon a time when we see you down these rainy streets.  (  alyx, 24, she/her, est)

FILE.

full name: juliana león

age: thirty-two

gender / pronouns: demi woman, she/they

orientation: pansexual

affiliation: medic for the executioners

occupation: nurse at the local hospital

family: julio león (father, deceased), luisa león (mother, deceased), antonia santos (cousin, alive)

faceclaim: adria arjona

inspiration: ted lasso (ted lasso), mary margaret blanchard (once upon a time), snow white (snow white)

Pinterest

BIOGRAPHY.

DEATH TW, GRIEF TW

Your childhood wasn't anything close to perfect, but it was everything you could've asked for. You grew up in a small town in the heart of Arkansas-- the kind of place where everyone knew each other and individuals rarely branched away from their humble life.

Your mother died shortly after giving birth to you, so it was always just you and your father against the world. Your father used to always try to get you to think beyond your small town, insisting that the world had more to offer you than just the same shops and families that often littered the town, but you always ignored his pleas. After all, why did you need the outside world, when the person you cared for the most was right in front of you?

After a while, he learned to accept your stubborn ways and stopped trying to push you away from home. Instead, you chose to attend classes at the local university and work to become a nurse for the town's clinic. You always had a desire to help others, and you saw this as an opportunity to make a difference in your small town. You knew it wasn't the most glamorous job, but you were never one to demand much-- just a friendly smile or light conversation was enough for you.

You somehow managed to graduate college and obtain a job at the clinic, but it wasn't long before you were forced to put that position on hold. Your father had been showing signs of exhaustion for months, but every time you asked about it, he insisted he was ok. It wasn't until it got worse that he finally admitted the truth he fought so hard to hide from you--- he was dying of heart failure.

The news broke you. This was your best friend, your family, and he hid his pain from you all this time. You began to question your career path, wondering if you were truly worthy of the title of 'healer' if you can't heal your own loved one. When he finally passed away in his sleep, those doubts began to creep in more, leaving you to shut yourself off from the world.

Months passed before you were finally able to pull yourself away from your grief. You knew your father wouldn't want you to spend your life in isolation, but every corner of the town reminded you of him. It wasn't until you found an old family photo that you realized what you needed to do. You needed to follow your father's advice and branch away from your small town, and your cousin would be the one to help you do that.

Although your family chose to remain in the small town you grew up in, your cousin's family moved away to NYC shortly after your cousin learned how to walk. You remembered the letter she wrote to you months ago, offering her place in a time of need, and decided to take her up on the offer. You never thought you'd be packing your life up and moving away from your small town, but when you boarded the flight to JFK, you knew there was no turning back.

The move to NYC was frightening, and the thought of being practically alone in a big city made you want to run back home. It wasn't until you stumbled upon an injured EXECUTIONER that you realized you might be where you belong. Healing the injured member not only brought back your love of healing but also allowed you to form a connection with the group. This chance encounter dragged you into the world of vigilantes, and though you may not understand the violence or brutality of the underworld, you know one thing: you'll be there to patch up everyone's wounds and bring a bit of light to the city's shadows.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

Salvation: Gimme the executioner who brought Juliana into the fold. This person would've gotten injured during one of their missions and gotten patched up by Juliana. They would've realized her talent for healing and willingness to help an injured stranger and brought her to meet the rest of the team. Juliana would hold this person in high regard-- viewing them with a slight adoration since they helped give her purpose in this new world.

Manipulator: Juliana's fatal flaw is her trusting nature. She came from a small town where everyone helped everyone, so she isn't used to the shady and disingenuous nature of the underground. This person would've noticed that weakness and chose to exploit it for their personal gain. Maybe they're trying to bring down the Executioners or one of their members. Maybe they're trying to get her to do their dirty work for them. Whatever the reason, their relationship with her is nothing more than a means to an end.

Work friends: When Juliana's not helping out the executioners, she can be seen working at the local hospital. I would love some people who either work alongside Juliana or tend to visit her frequently due to injuries. Doesn't even have to be friends-- it could be grumpy coworkers or someone who knows they're going to get a look of disapproval the moment Juliana sees them. Anything involving the hospital works for me.

I’ll probably add more ideas later but honestly down for anything :)

[justzawe]

Zawe Ashton Rewrites Regency-core

The "Mr. Malcolm's List" actress on finally being invited to the table of period pieces, and her upcoming Marvel debut.

Zawe Ashton is back in her favorite city, New York, sitting in a room at the Plaza Hotel having just finished a long day of interviews. Her latest film, the Regency-era rom-com “Mr. Malcolm’s List,” will open in the U.S. on Friday (at the premiere on Wednesday she’ll reveal to the world that she and her fiancé, Tom Hiddleston, are expecting a baby), before an August premiere in the U.K., but she’s relishing this moment in the Big Apple, marveling at the film’s birth.

“It’s surreal that it’s coming out at all,” Ashton says, feet tucked underneath her as she sits on the room’s bed. “This film is a low-budget film; it was a labor of love for so many people. Everyone who came aboard did it for the passion, not for the paycheck. And so I knew that we’d made something really lovely, but I didn’t ever expect that we’d be here in New York with the costumes displayed at Saks Fifth Avenue and there being this kind of real buzz around it, you know? It’s lovely.”

“Mr. Malcolm’s List,” which was shot in Dublin during the second lockdown of 2021, is in many ways a little movie that could; it originated as a proof-of-concept short film a few years ago but struggled to find funding to be made into a feature. Then came “Bridgerton” and everything changed.

“I think that created green lights going off across so many different production companies and [‘Mr. Malcolm’s List’] was one of them,” Ashton says.

She was a last-minute addition to the casting, after a few other actors dropped out due to scheduling.

“I got a phone call saying, ‘there’s the script from ‘Mr. Malcolm’s List,’ it’s part of this exciting new wave of Regency work and they need an answer by tomorrow morning,’” Ashton recalls. “It worked really well for me because I’m prone to overthinking and I just had to zone straight in on all of the very primal elements of the project. And the meeting of rom-com and Regency romance, two genres that I love, the intersection of the two of them is even more delicious. The character, the ensemble that was assembled, the opportunity to amplify a first-time female feature director were all green flags. And so in 24 hours I was headed to Dublin.

While doing a Regency film might seem like a given for a British actor, Ashton says it’s not been the case for actors of color until recently — and she’s been eagerly awaiting her chance.

“I grew up like so many British people reading and studying the Jane Austens and the Brontës and the Dickens of the world, and those landscapes are part of your DNA in a way, and you do imagine yourself inside of those roles and inside of those landscapes. I was always aware that there was a real chasm between where my imagination could go and where the scope of the filmic interpretations were,” she says. “So it’s always been quite sad that I’ve never really been invited to the table to partake in the Regency-core and the period drama scene that dominates so much of our TV and film in the U.K. I don’t know, if it takes a lockdown and Shonda Rhimes to change that, then fantastic.

“But I think it was already starting to change,” she continues. “I had really enjoyed ‘David Copperfield’ with Dev Patel. I was extremely excited to see Jodie Turner-Smith taking on a role like Anne Boleyn, and now we have ‘The Gilded Age.’ So there were rumblings, but you need the juggernaut. It’s like with ‘Black Panther,’ we hadn’t necessarily seen a huge Marvel movie with that level of representation and the fact that it not only was a wonderful story, but it made money has opened so many doors. It’s a shame we’ve all had to wait so long. I know myself, Freida Pinto and Ṣọpẹ́ Dìrísù, who were all in the movie and it’s our first ever period piece, all feel the same: there’s a sadness in it having taken so long, but also a real pride in being able to create this work now.”

Her character, Julia, is one you can’t help but root for, even as she makes several less-than-earnest choices along the way. Ashton delights in playing an antihero, she says, and will once again take on the trope when she makes her Marvel debut next year in “The Marvels,” playing the villain in the Nia DaCosta-directed film (the first Marvel movie from a Black female director, who will also be the youngest Marvel director ever.)

“I’ve loved it. I’ve loved every single second. I did not expect it to happen,” Ashton says of joining the Marvel world. “It came out of an opportunity inspired by a real connection with Nia DaCosta, again another fledgling female director. And I just had an intentionality, I think from the end of 2019 where I just thought, ‘I just want to be of service as much as possible in my work. And one of the ways I can do that is to amplify fledgling female filmmaking talent.’”

She and DaCosta Zoomed at the height of the pandemic and bonded, oddly enough, over their love of period pieces and Jane Austen.

“I just threw everything at it,” she says of the role. “I don’t have any expectations of what it will or won’t be. I just know that I’ve played the female antagonist in a fantasy movie. And that feels like a real tick off the bucket list. And I’ve helped the first ever Black woman direct a Marvel movie. And that feels satisfying enough for now, you know?”

And playing a Marvel antagonist is rather fun, it turns out.

“It’s such a theme in my work: I’m never the romantic lead, I’m always just like the edgy one on the side,” she says with a laugh. “I love it. I love an antihero’s journey. I’ve always been drawn to those characters in literature and in film, and in art generally. I would prefer to love someone despite their flaws than be led into the more obvious likable characters. And to play, you get to leave your ego at the door. You get to not worry about being liked. You get to just really play the truth of someone’s experience, and people are messy. Life is messy. I feel like a real sense of achievement if I’ve managed to create a character with deep flaws that people still end up rooting for.” (x)

[frostyreturns]

End Times/False Prophets

It bothers me to no end when I hear Christians with such a nonchalant view of the world, who think preparation for hard times is silly and dismiss people like me as conspiracy theorists. I mean lets see what Jesus has to say when he was asked about the end times.

Matthew 24

Jesus answered: “Watch out that no one deceives you. 5 For many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah,’ and will deceive many. 6 You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. 7 Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. 8 All these are the beginning of birth pains.

9 “Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me. 10 At that time many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, 11 and many false prophets will appear and deceive many people. 12 Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13 but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. 14 And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.

It's why it also drives me nuts when I hear preachers talking about the coming days with excitement about how God is going to show up and topple the government and establish his own kingdom on earth and overthrow the evil politicians and their system so don't worry we're about to be winning...they're reading a different Bible. The amount I have to hear about how Gods going to use Trump to fix everthing makes me sick.

There's a bunch of people like this woman Julie Green cough* putting these ideas out there that are basically just qanon for Christians. Sit back do nothing and don't worry the booms are coming, don't worry about the house on fire God will put it out so just stay there dont move, leave the fire extinguishers alone its all good. And don’t worry Ms Green is definitely a Christian and her prophecies are definitely from God...fresh prophecies every day just in time for her broadcast, God on a schedule so convenient. And of course they’re all this pure Americanist Christianity garbage where America is God’s country and all his concerns are about America and America is Gods chosen country. 

And she makes prophecies that are either impossible to be disproven because they are so vague like ‘famous person that’s always in the news will be in the news for something’...or it will be something that’s already long ago happened but is just something normie church ladies dont know about. Like she predicted a month or two ago that John Mccain would be exposed as a traitor...lol yeah thanks I knew about him since 2008 and not because God told me. and qanon popularized it years ago during Trumps presidency, its a well known fact. Even if it werent why would God be concerned about exposing a single dead politician?

 Or she’ll do psychic cold reading style things like saying “a wolf will be in the news for a surprising reason.” so in order for this prediction to be wrong then from now until the end of time there can never be any news stories about wolves, and no matter what the story is she can claim its what she was talking about and define what she means by surprising after the fact. It’s all con artist shit. Like she predicted Trump would win the 2020 election which for a con artist is a safe bet he was obviously way and wildly more popular so at worst it was a 50/50 gamble but he prediction didn’t account for cheating, and so she tried to walk it back and say her prediction didn’t come true because Christians were being punished for not doing what God wants. 

She also preaches pre trublulation rapture which again looks like telling Christians what they want to hear to reassure them and make them feel safe and comfortable and also means she didn’t read Matthew.

29 “Immediately after the distress of those days

“‘the sun will be darkened,    and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky,    and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.’

30 “Then will appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven. And then all the peoples of the earth will mourn when they see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven, with power and great glory.31 And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of the heavens to the other. 

Notice the use of words like “then” and “after”

God is real prophecies are real...but that doesn’t mean you should just listen to anyone who claims to be a Christian and who claims to have a word from God without analyzing it thinking about it critically and weighing it against scripture.

[sarifinasnightmare]

Hey , it's me again. Can I get a combination of 24 and 1 from the arranged marriage prompts? And you already know I want Sarah bucky. Please if it's not too much to ask. And if you can't do a combination just 24 or 1 you pick.

Okay, @ivorylei this one was HARD because I wanted to keep it short. It'll be in three parts instead. I am so tired, so I'm going to bed now. 😴

I have Found Better (Chapter 1)

Warnings: Danger, Gun Violence, Possessive Behavior, Violence, Kidnapping, Possessive Sex

Alternate Universe - Steampunk (vaguely)

Alternate Universe - Royalty (yup)

The world discovered steam-powered machinery, science was no longer witchcraft and technology made the near impossible possible. Men and women of all nations sought educations that would lead them to be a part of the bright future before them. As countries adapted to the changes, wars and alliances were made. The Archduke James Buchanan Barnes of Pârâul (Romanian) and the Baroness Sarah Ríodorado (Moor Spain) had been promised from birth to be married. It had been partially to access trade and partially out of friendship. She was supposed to have been sent to Pârâul at the age of thirteen, so she’d become accustomed to the land and the court before being married to her intended at nineteen but just as she was being prepared for her journey, her sixteen-year-old groom went into battle and disappeared….

….Ten years had passed until he was found and when he was found he was not the same.

_________________---

Sarah watched the clouds float by as the dirigible flew her over to Pârâul, her stomach in nerves. She had not thought of her first intended for years and even though the families had been upset by the loss of the alliance these things happen. Heirs died unexpectedly, wars broke out, alliances fell apart, royal families were sacked-it happened. With all the inventions created the world had become more connected, more diverse, more mechanically driven and more dangerous. Adaptability was a must.

In ten years, she had been engaged and un-engaged four times over and now at twenty-three her first fiancé suddenly emerged from the dead, and his mother was eager to get her out there as fast as possible. Given the choice between an old Prince looking for a nursemaid/wife and the rediscovered Archduke, she quickly chose the former. Baron Samuel had his doubts but the alliance would be beneficial and economical, so he hugged his sister goodbye and promised to write to her often. However now as the airship sailed towards her new home she felt her misgivings grow.

The ambassador to Pârâul had come bearing a letter from the Grand Princess Winnifred, the mother of the Archduke that initially was welcoming but now smacked of desperation.

Dearest Sarah,

I hope this letter finds you and your family well. I wanted to assure you that the rumors are true and that my darling James has been found and returned to me. The Viscount Rogers never stopped searching for him and with the will of God, he brought him home. He was so ill when he came to us but now is doing better. Although my kingdom still has sweet Rebecca, everyone at court believes James should be married quickly and produce heirs. You know I have always been fond of you, and it must be God’s will that you are still free. It would put my heart at ease to have you come and fulfill the arrangement made a decade ago. The people and the court greatly desire your presence. James has been made aware of my choice and he is in agreement. The alliance will be honored, but the dowry need not come. A grand wedding is being planned and all arrangements for your stay have been made. Bring what you need, my dear. Our family eagerly awaits your inclusion to our home.

Sincerely,

Grand Princess Winnifred of Pârâul

The flight took three days and two layovers but once she arrived the greeting was as warm as promised. The Grand Princess and Duchess Rebecca greeted her as did the court who all seemed very happy to see her. Sarah behaved graciously but once alone with the family she finally asked.

“When will I meet the Archduke?”

Winnifred, a petite woman with iron gray hair and blazing blue eyes gave her a comforting smile. “In just a moment but I wanted to explain something to you.”

“What is it?”

“James had been captured by the enemy. He’d been tortured and changed to become their soldier….their assassin.”

Sarah frowned. “Has he been disfigured?”

Rebecca, a beauty of twenty-one shook her head. “Not facially, but his left arm-”

“Shush, Becca!” The older lady interrupted. “He is whole, but he is confused and needs a gentle hand which is why I asked you to be his bride. You’ve always been kind, patient and intelligent and he needs a wife who have those qualities in abundance.”

For a moment Sarah wondered what she had agreed to, but she’d soon find out. In a drawing room she was sent to finally meet James with Rebecca in attendance. First thing she saw was Viscount Rogers, his childhood friend but then she saw the Archduke.

His hair was dark and long falling loose over his face. The suit was a richly made black, trimmed in silver. Her eyes widen when she noticed that his entire left arm was of metal. The blue eyes that stared back at her seemed to reflect cold curiosity but little else. Vaguely she remembered him from childhood but she had to admit he was handsome in a beastly sort of way.

Sarah curtsied. “Archduke, I’m Baroness Sarah of Riodorado.”

James glanced at Steve who smiled encouragingly. “She’s going to be your wife. Treat her gently and be polite. You’re not the Winter Soldier anymore, you’re Archduke James Bucky Barnes.”

He didn’t know what to think. He’d been the Winter Soldier for Kaiser Johann and his doctor Zola but now he was a ruler. It was too much to take in but so far everyone had treated him nicely and there had been no pain, no blood, no screams. He had a mother and a sister and a friend who took great efforts to teach him who he’d been before, but it was difficult changing from a soldier to a lord. Lords commanded and received whatever they wanted, so it should not have surprised him when his mother gently suggested a companion; someone pretty and sweet to keep him company. He had glanced over the women of court, but they were all frightened of him. Unapproachable and unpredictable he’d been called. Yet now this beauty was before him seemingly unafraid; she was supposed to be his wife? He approached and studied her, dressed in an elegant yellow and lace dress, the bustle and corset accentuating her curves nicely. She looked…soft.

Sarah gasped when his hands cupped her face, and he moved in closer. Everyone jumped at the suddenness of his action. The curious gaze had deepened, and he appeared to be studying her, sizing her like a wolf about to pounce. She didn’t know whether to look away or fight him, so she wrapped her hands around his wrist and squeezed a little.

“Do you mean to kiss me, lord?” She whispered.

Her skin was soft and flawless; it seemed to have an inner glow that was pretty. Darkness usually meant cold but her brown eyes were warm, deep and inviting. A hunger seized him, and it made him want to take her, touch her, claim her. Pleasure curled around him and purred for more. Her lips were plump, moist and-

His lips were on hers and it caught her by surprise by how possessively he kissed. Determined not to be cowed by his dominance she kissed him back, her own tongue darting in the tease him and he seemed to approve, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her tight against him. A fire swept through her and she shivered in pleasure. Suddenly she was swept off her feet and it looked like he meant to carry her away somewhere.

Steve quickly stopped his friend. “Buck, you must marry her first. Put her down, she isn’t your wife yet.”

Rebecca quickly went to tug her brother’s arm. “Not yet Jamie. You have to say your vows first, put her down before you frighten her away.”

James looked over at Sarah who didn’t appear frightened just concerned. The kiss had been delicious and the pleasure felt wonderful flowing through his veins. Is that what came with having a wife? He must have more of that sensation. He’d only met her for a moment, but he knew he liked her and that he wanted her so frightening her away wasn’t what he wanted to do. Gently he set her back down.

Sarah smiled in thanks but the moment she was ushered out immediately sought the Grand Princess.

“What in the world happened to him? He just kissed me and meant to have his way with me right then and there!” She demanded. To be honest the kiss was delightful, and he was easy on the eyes, but questions still needed answers.

The elegant woman became genuinely upset and she burst into tears. “Forgive me! I didn’t mean to withhold the whole truth, but I am desperate to save my son.”

Through her tears she explained that James had been brainwashed to see himself as a soldier, to follow orders and do as he’s told. It took weeks to convince him that he was free from his oppressors and that Steve and everyone else were his friends not his handlers. He had been tortured and had terrible nightmares. The doctors believed he’d been isolated and that a gentle but firm companion could draw him out of the protective mental box he’d stored himself in. So far most of the ladies of the court had found him intimidating and aggressive.

“I thought of you…” Winnifred murmured. “…of your spirit and intelligence and I thought perhaps you’d be the one to bring back my son.”

“So I’m to be a nursemaid to a sick man.” Sarah sighed in exasperation. “Your Highness, I don’t know if I can be his savior.”

“Oh but you are! Look at how you reacted to him. You didn’t draw away! You’re braver than any lady at court. Is my son so repulsive? Please be honest.”

No, he wasn’t repulsive, in fact his kiss still made her lips tingle. “I’m flattered but-”

“Let me make a bargain with you, a promise. If he gets better then let the marriage stand, but if he doesn’t then just produce an heir. A boy or girl, it doesn’t matter. If he becomes a danger then I will guarantee your protection on the Cross, I swear!”

 Sarah decided to think about it, and she did, pondering the benefits of marrying a man who looked like an angel, kissed like the devil and needed care. Later a servant brought the contract with the Grand Princess’ signature and seal; all it needed was hers. Leaving it unsigned she went to prepare for bed. It was good to get out of the corset after a long day and felt much better in nightgown.

She was looking for her silk bonnet when her eyes caught a glint of metal and turned in surprise to see James suddenly in the room! Looking for her robe, she went to grab it and put it on only for him to stop her.

When she hadn’t come back, he’d become anxious and wanted to find her. Steve assured him she was still in the palace but it wasn’t enough to soothe him so he went on the hunt. Fortunately, she wasn’t too far away and even better, she was barely dressed. Pulling her back into his arms again, he kissed her once more.

God, he was really good at this, she thought, as she wrapped her arms around him. Again, he swept her off her feet and carried her to the bed. He laid her down gently and hovered for a moment, admiring before swooping down for more.

Sarah briefly wondered if she ought to just let it happen but could already hear the disapproving voices in her head. He was gorgeous with his long hair over his face, and she felt the first stirrings of desire, but she had to be a good girl. Gently she drew their lips apart. “James, stop.”

He frowned. “Why?”

“Because I’m asking you to respect my boundaries. I’m not ready to be intimate with you yet, so please stop.”

She firmly pushed him back and he sat up, obedient. “Have I done something wrong?”

“Not yet.” She said soothingly. “I just got here and I’m tired. You seem very enthusiastic, and I like that, but tradition demands that we get married before we do anything more. If we get caught I will be in trouble and sent out of the palace.”

His gaze went cold. “I don’t want you to go away.”

“Good and neither do I.” She surprised herself by saying that. “Can we talk a little instead? Before I sleep?”

He nodded and so they talked. She spoke of her family in her country or her likes and dislikes. He revealed the carnage he’d unleashed as the Winter Soldier. It was frightening, but he seemed sad about it, and she felt pity for him. What had happened to the sixteen-year-old youth to make him such a hard-edged soldier? What torture and abuse had he been subjected to? She asked him if he was glad to be free and he said that he was, but it was lonely and the nightmares were terrible.  He was damaged without a doubt, but he was also good at heart, eager to know her and seemed determined to do better. She liked the way he looked at her too with his blue eyes tracing over her and delighting in every peek of skin her nightgown allowed him. The way his tongue darted out to lick his lips made her shiver and truly she wondered if she could find better or handsomer than her first betroth? She kissed him gently and urged him back to his bed and was pleased when he offered no protest.

The next morning, she signed the contract. It may all end in disaster, but maybe not. He intrigued her and she couldn’t resist.

________________---

To Be Continued...

[callofthxvoid]

Please welcome VALERIA "VAL" MORENO (SHE/HER) to Huntsville, WV. They are a 24-year-old VISITOR who lives in TOWN. You may see them around working as a RANGER AT THE SOUTH STATION. Poor unfortunate soul. We’ll see if they survive.

quick facts

Title: The Hurricane

Name: Valeria Annabeth Moreno

Nickname: Val

Date of Birth: October 13, 1999

Age: 24

Place of Birth: Chicago, Illinois

Hometown: Chicago, Illinois

Languages: English, Spanish

Faceclaim: Maia Reficco

Pronouns: She/They

Sexuality: Polyamorous Pansexual

Relationship Status: In an open relationship with Cain Barlowe

personality

Myers-Briggs: ISTP - The Virtuoso

Enneagram: Type Six - The Skeptic (6w5)

Moral Alignment: True Neutral

Occupation: Forest Ranger at South Watch Tower

Role: Hunter

[+] quick, independent, street smart, devoted [-] temperamental, insubordinate, withdrawn, resentful

Character Inspirations: April Ludgate (Parks and Recreation), Yang Xiao Long (RWBY), Maya Hart (Girl Meets World), Kate Bishop (Marvel)

background

TW: Parental Neglect, Abandonment, Alcoholism

Valeria has no real memories of her parents. Her biological father was never in the picture, and what she remembers of her mother is a woman who was far too flippant, flighty, and irresponsible to raise a child. As a result, she was often left with her uncle without warning, and ultimately ended up being raised by him once her mom left for good - which, all things considered, was probably the best choice for her. Sure, he drank a little too much, and he never talked about what he did for a living, but he cared for her well enough to provide her with a largely decent childhood.

Everything changed when the life he never talked about finally caught up to them.

One night, someone broke into their apartment and a fight ensued, ending with Val getting severely injured in the crossfire. As she recovered in the hospital, an agent and a federal prosecutor came to see her and told her everything; her uncle was a professional hitman, he had decided to testify against his employer, and in spite of her vocal protests, they were both being placed into witness protection for their own safety. To say that she was extremely unhappy about it would be an understatement. She didn't think it was fair that she had to uproot her life, assume a new identity and never see her friends or her girlfriend again when she hadn't even done anything wrong, and things only got worse when en route to their new home they ended up stuck in Huntsville along with the Marshals accompanying them.

Arriving halfway through her freshman year, Val spent her entire high school career keeping to herself out of sheer spite, as if settling in and making new friends would be a betrayal toward the life she left behind. She stopped caring about school, and started spending her days exploring the woods around town because at least there, she could have her solitude without anyone expecting her to engage in conversation. And even though she didn't want to blame him for what happened, the combination of her uncle's excessive drinking (which only got worse the longer they remained in Huntsville) and her bitter resentment inevitably led to a rift between her and the one reminder she still had of who she used to be, other than her own name.

It's been almost a decade, and it's only in the past year that Val has slowly started opening up and actually making real connections to other people. Her job as a ranger, which seemed like a natural fit after spending most of her teen years in the forest, is perhaps the most responsible for her coming out of her shell - it helps that many of her coworkers are, to put it nicely, also not good with people. But even as she settles into life in Huntsville, there is a part of her that's still waiting for this whole nightmare to end so that she can go back home and pick up where she left off - even if deep down, she knows that ship sailed a long time ago.

misc

She has a tremor in her right hand, but she's not sure if it's psychological or a physical result of the injuries she sustained. Either way, she has basically become ambidextrous as a result of having to use her left hand more.

Val loves singing and songwriting. She hasn't played much since her injury, but she still brought her guitar and ukulele to Huntsville just in case. She has gotten better at playing with her left, but she doesn't have the right instruments for it.

Before her injuries, Val was a promising track and field star at her old school. Her dream was to go to the Olympics. She chose not to continue when they moved to Huntsville.

[merrock]

CHARACTER INFORMATION

face claim: Idris Elba

full name: Marquis Owusu

nickname(s) / goes by: Marcus 

pronouns & gender: he/him/his and cis man 

sexuality: heterosexual 

birth date: November 24, 1973 ( 50 years old )

birth place: Saint-Germain-en-Laye, France

arrival to merrock: 2011, twelve years ago. 

housing: the coast and pier

occupation: Owner and CEO of Le Marquis Business Consultancy and Investments Inc  

work place: 

family: deceased mother and father, deceased wife of eight years, one older siblings and two younger siblings, three children: Charlotte “Lottie” Rose, daughter born October 2017 and twins Finn Dion and Sienna Alexandra born August 2018

relationship status: Widower / Single

PERSONALITY

He’s got a face that people often takes him to be incredibly serious, and when it comes to work, he plays no games. Marquis can often seem cold and aloof, aside from when he is with close friends and family. There, another side of him comes out, a more charming and caring side of him comes out. He knows his fault is shutting people out after so much loss in his life but he tries his best to not come across as harsh or standoffish but it’s something he knows that his personality comes with a fault and is something he continually is working on to just not be the ‘business man’ that he often exudes when in public. 

WRITTEN BY: Bri (she/her), est.

BACKGROUND / BIO

triggering / sensitive content: tw parental death, tw parental loss, tw death mention, tw spousal death, tw childbirth, tw death, tw infertility, tw early term pregnancy

Born to Omari Osuwu and Penelope Osuwu in Saint-Germain-en-Laye, France life with the Osuwu’s was relatively normal. Well, as normal of a life could be for a household of six. Being the second born child came with less challenges, at least that was his mother always alleged. When she welcomed Marquis into the family she was expecting him to be the rebel son, the hot-headed tempered child, much like her pregnancy had been. Hot and cold the entire time, but from the moment he popped into the world he was the levelheaded peaceful child of the bustling bunch. 

Despite the challenges that came with his father always working, his mother made the best home for them. They didn’t go without, his father providing for the family financially while being the disciplinary in the household. For the most part he ruled with an iron fist, but that was just due to the fact he liked order. It was never too much of a power trip, or nothing his mother couldn’t manage to smooth over if she felt he was being too particularly difficult with any of the children. Still, as most people saw it, he was a man attempting to raise a family of four children and keep a happy wife. Sometimes that meant having things more strict and set at times than others. Still, if you asked him, there was no doubt that his mother was the shining star of their Owusu family. She made sure they got to live their best childhoods possible. There were trips to Paris, day or weekend long excursions to neighboring countries, and endless activities that pepper his memory. One thing his mother was determined o do was raise well-rounded, worldly children. For this, from the moment they were just starting school, each child was enrolled by their mother into multiple language lessons. 

By the time Marquis was thirteen he was fluent in French, English, Spanish, and German. Given both his parents were well-versed in multiple languages themselves, his father always appreciated the love and care that his wife put in to making sure the kids would have the best opportunities for their future, starting with being fluent in other languages and enrolling them in a top accredited school for their primary and secondary education. In his father’s eyes this would give them the best advantage when going out into the world when they became adults.

To Marquis, by any other standard, the Owusu’s lived a normal life with his family. When he turned seventeen he started interning with his father at the bank he worked at, and it was the first lightbulb that went off in his head that things made sense. He caught onto patterns faster than his father, started to build client relationships, and before he knew it he had caught the eye of the local bank president who decided to make him a personal project and take him under his wing as a mentee. With a new mentor leading him distance grew between his father and him. After finishing secondary school, and with glowing recommendations from his mentor he entered a business school in Paris. Part of him wasn’t expecting to excel as well as he did but each time he turned around he was catching the eyes of several professors — and the women on the campus. 

During his university years he was know as a bit of a lady’s man, wining and dining them, but never was in the mindset to settle down. If anything it was just the little bit of fun he needed while building towards whatever future career he was planning for himself. To him, a relationship wasn’t needed to him to be happy. To him his goals were always more career oriented, much like his father. Setting his eyes on someday being a president of a local bank in France, living a comfortable life, once all the things fell into place. It wasn’t until one of his professors approached him and told him he could do so much more with his skill set. That aiming for just working in a bank was well below what he could do. While back to interning with his father, he signed up for all different classes at his university that his new mentor suggested from accounting, investing, human resources, project management, and more. This was where he got the first taste of the world of investment. 

When he graduated university he accepted a position in an investment firm as an entry level advisor. At the beginning it was mostly just paperwork and mind-numbing dribble. There came a point he almost gave it up, starting to think this wasn’t the career path for him. But, stubborn like a bull, he stuck it through and started to gather his own clientele and a name for himself within the business. 

Over the next few years Marquis continually raised through the ranks learning every bit he could about proper investing in companies, start-up businesses, and people. In his mid twenties, his father suddenly passed due to cardiac arrest leaving his mother well off financially. Though no amount of money can prepare a person for losing the love of their life. While his father had never been overly affectionate, his mother always said he loved her beyond measure at all times of the day. Something Marquis didn’t fully understand since he had never felt a love that powerful. What could he comprehend? His mother passing away only six weeks later. Doctors said it was respiratory failure but Marquis knew his mother died of a broken heart and couldn’t continue to live without the love of her life. Once the estate was settled each sibling was left a considerable amount of financials from everything from trusts to properties, something Marquis hadn’t even been aware they had. 

For awhile he floated lost in the world, losing both parents so close together and both of them prior to him turning thirty years old. He attempted his hardest to be a sounding board for his younger siblings when needed while still attempting to try and figure out his own grief and life — mainly how to move forward after something that rocked his life upside down. Anger, sadness, and grief started to consume him little by little so he threw himself into his work, storing his portion of money he had inherited into investments while he continued to work. 

After being overlooked and several promotions came and went with someone with less experience were brought up over him, despite the massive clientele base he had brought into the business, he decided to reach out to the one person he felt like he still had for his own sounding board. His old mentor and father’s old boss, this is where the budding idea started of opening his own investment firm in France. He wanted a mix of business consultancy and investments. Little did he know how good he’d be at running his own business, investing others money into proper channels and consulting for others to build their own businesses taking a percentage of profit to help up and coming business. For the next decade Le Marquis Business Consultancy and Investments Inc opened two more brick and mortar businesses in France, one in London, one in New York City, one in Miami and one in Los Angeles. For Marquis this was all about building his empire, building his legacy, and taking a no holds barge approach. 

Some considered him ruthless with the way he came in and built a company of seven offices around the world, but he was building something for himself, and no one else. His siblings, however, bugged him about settling down but it truly never crossed his mind. With the amount of travel and meetings to keep the expanse of businesses he had running who had time to think about settling down. It wasn’t that he didn’t date, he just didn’t let it get any further than a few fun nights in bed before going their separate ways. It wasn’t until he was home one Christmas at thirty five years old did he meet the new next door neighbor to his eldest sibling. It was here he understood the meaning of what it was to meet your other half and feel like you were struck by lightening all at once. Eleanor was confident, had a tiny business making jewelry and his idea of sweet talking was offering to invest into her business. What truly shocked him was the blunt way she told him to kick rocks and move along. 

It was no immediate love story, though he was captured by her immediately, but mostly it started off as bickering but slowly developed into more. Marriage followed nearly two years later after dating and they started talking about him slowing down as Eleanor wanted children. With a promise of opening one last firm, what he would coin his ‘retirement’ firm where he’d work most exclusively out of, would be what lead him to Merrock where Eleanor’s parents were local from. After finding the perfect building for his business they spent the next several months settling into Merrock life. 

Going from massive cities, constant traveling, and endless business meetings to small town life wasn’t easy for Marquis at first. It left him restless but his wife was patient with him. It was at 38 years old did both Marquis and Eleanor start trying for a family of their own. With his wife at only 32 years old he didn’t think it would be as hard as it was, but one year turned into two and they were slapped with potential infertility issues. With the help of medication and lots of patience, at 44 years old Marquis and his wife welcomed their first born daughter into the world. 

They were supposed to be on cloud nine, and it wasn’t supposed to happen, but twelve weeks later they got the news that after one night of celebrating, Eleanor was 5 weeks pregnant, and to bigger surprise came then when they found out she was pregnant with twins. Being that his wife was nearly 39 years old now she was placed in high risk. Marquis took every precaution possible once he heard those words, money was no object and he sought out the best medical care to bring to Merrock. At only twenty eight weeks along Eleanor went into labor delivering two premature babies, a beautiful baby boy and baby girl. They were small and needed time to develop in the NICU but they were strong, however his wife wasn’t as lucky. Due to the high risk pregnancy she suffered two embolisms in her lungs and by the time they caught it, it was too late and she didn’t survive through the night. 

At nearly 45 years old Marquis was now not only a widow but caring for three babies, an almost one year old, and newborn infants. His siblings came to Merrock and with the help of Eleanor’s parents to help him settle in as best as he could. Five years later he still regrets waiting so long to start a family. Part of him blames himself that if he hadn’t been so stubborn and worried strictly about his business, if they had tried earlier, she wouldn’t be gone. Not to mention the regrets he has not being careful enough after she had given birth to their first daughter. It’s a blame he hasn’t let himself forgive himself for, and not sure he ever will. 

At the end of the day, business doesn’t stop for anyone when you are running a global company. To be close to his wife’s roots and her family he decided to stay in Merrock, though his family suggested him coming back to France. After hiring a nanny to hep with the kids in between, he has done everything he can to be as devoted of a father, attempting to give them anything and everything they could want. It means learning how to balance the business that he hopes to someday pass onto his children, and spending time with his little family. Though if you had told him in his twenties he’d never thought at fifty years old he’d be a widower raising his six year old daughter and five year old twins. But something he’s learned several times in life, life doesn’t always go as planned. 

[zaceouiswriting]

Life

Good sad day my friends!

I would’ve never thought that I would write a message like this. But here we are. Today we are getting a bit personal, maybe even a bit more than most of you are comfortable with.

I’m a 24 year old dude. As many of you might already have guessed gay. But there is also a very dark side of me, despite all my creative work. Since as my therapist believes, my birth, I suffer from manic depression. To top this all off, I got hit by a truck when I was nineteen. It almost ripped my left foot from my body. 

After getting into a hospital it took two weeks, before doctors could save it, in an operation that with some complications took over twelve hours.

Up to this point in my life, I was hyper focused on school. I had to learn a third language, because I didn’t do it when I was younger to finish school, which seemed impossible for me. After this accident, every little thing took a backseat.

My mental health fell into a dark pit, worse than anything I had encountered before. The worst thing was, that no-one around me seemed to really care, except for my father who tried everything to keep me going. But something in me died that day. As I was laying on the street, after getting hit by this truck, on my way to school, on my bicycle.

I couldn’t hold myself together. Went less and less to school, until the point, I wasn’t able to finish it anymore. After the school year ended, I was able to leave the house for two-three more months, before this was impossible for me.

Since then I have developed a fear, a panic to leave my home.

You might asked yourself: „Why is this dude on the internet on Tumblr of all places, who writes stuff, telling me all of this?“

Well my answer is a sad one. Since that day, I of course needed something to cope with. To keep me afloat. Because I am actively trying to get the only talent I have, telling stories, to finance a future for myself. It is also the only thing, that is keeping me actively alive.

But there are things, that keeps my head from the more darker thoughts. And as silly as this might sound, it is mostly youtube gaming content.

Im a gamer, when I'm not writing, which is a big part of my life. Today a news, that shocked my world broke to me trough.

I don’t know how many of you are gamers themselves or watching gaming content, But there is a guy his name is „Technoblade“, who is a beacon for me. Someone who could make me laugh, at the darkest of my moments, giving me a hand, to help me on a ledge to get out of the darkness to at least exist without the hopelessness, my head wants me to feel.

Today I learned, that he died. After as it seems a long hard battle with cancer. Which hit me extra hard, because a couple of years ago, when I was seventeen, I was at the side of a childhood friend, until her passing away from the same illness. I told her stories to keep her head off of things. But we all knew that she was going to die.

When we were kids, I promised her that I would be there, when she passes on. Then, neither of us knew what that meant. But I kept my promise. And hold her until her very last breath. Before she passed on, she told me that she loved me. She knew that I could never reciprocate her feelings, but I loved her too, not in the same sense, she did me, but it was enough to tell her that I loved her too.

I hoped, to never get trough an experience like this, at least not, until I was better myself. Even without knowing Technoblade personally. He saved my life countless of times. Not only he, but other content creators as well.

It hurts deep down, that everything I can get help from, are now only old videos of him, things I already watched, love but already know. To be aware of the fact, that he is gone, hits so much deeper, than I ever thought was possible. At the end of the day, I and so many others, did not know I’m personally, but he still was a part of our lives. A bright one at that.

Im angry, at the audacity of life to let someone, even younger than me, go trough this, to die such a horrible death. I’m sad for his family and everyone who got impacted by his humor, wit and friendliness. But I’m also happy, that he was a part of my life and so many others too. His death might be a great loss, but his memories are treasures we all should keep in our hearts.

We should take an example of his strength, his will and mental fortitude. 

And to the unasked question, why I telling this on Tumblr? To be honest I don’t have any other meanings of doing this. As I had said, I was hyper focused on school and after my accident, had not the strength to build anything else up. Just now years later, I slowly come out of my own shell. But I have no experience with Social Media, or Youtube or such. So this is really the only place I can tell a part of my story and tell people, how much Technoblade helped me get trough a lot of the darker times.

I just hoped, I could’ve keep his spirit alive. But as incompetent as I am at social media, more than this post, most likely will not happen. Which is sad, because for the impact he had, he would’ve deserved so much more from me.

Thank you for reading all of this, I just hope, enough people get to read this. And sorry for the ramble, when I’m under mental stress, I tend to jump between the things I want to tell.

Rest in Peace, Technoblade.

Have great day, you beautiful people, even with this news and these circumstances. I will take this day off from any work and will rewatch most likely all of his content.

We see us tomorrow hopefully under more heartwarming circumstances.

[maguro13-2]

Darkness Reborn ~ Origins of the Ink Final Chapter Pt. 24 ~

"It all happened at the end of the show before studio shaft went to make the movies."

"Drawcia, Head of Drawcia Family Science Corporation, discovered on her research that the true ruler of the cosmos isn't Shinigami, but acclaims to be a goddess that was unveiled by the eye of truth."

"Shinra thought that he created a entity made from Adolla Burst to keep truth out of it, but a Goddess still remains as the cosmos' true ruler. This Goddess that rules the universe is none other than Madoka Kaname, or perhaps that the name Madoka is Godoka."

"Before Godoka's birth, Godoka was the giver of earth hope's along with Angel Vibe that gifted Shinra to destroy Demon Vibe's creation, the Evangelist, in order to save his world from being fallen by the despair gifted by the one-winged man himself, the true giver of humanity's despair was none other than Sephiroth."

"After Death and the manifested Soul World was created, the Time-traveling and destroyer of universe, called the Time Eater, came and annihilated Shinra and his people, including his beloved Iris. Following this after the execution of Inca Kasugatani, the goddess that gave Shinra hope fell into despair that became a victim to her own heart and that despair gifted from Sephiroth would be the fault of Demon Vibe, knowing that it was all part of his dream of bring galactic conquest and would cover the galaxy in an the everlasting reaches of darkness."

"With the help from Truth, Godoka and Angel Vibe manages to prevent the despair that was actually a key to open the Door to Darkness and stopped Demon Vibe from ever conquering the galaxy. And after his defeat, he was banished to a mysterious world known as the Shadow Realm."

"Thus, Godoka was no longer being controlled by the despair and restored hope as the gift of light itself. But suddenly, Godoka herself disappears."

Homura Akemi : And after Soul World was created as a facade to Shadow Realm, why on earth would Madoka be the goddess of another universe to rule? Please, Madoka! It's me, Homura!

Tabuu : So a human girl that is literally goddess that rules the cosmos and is the one reponsible for giving hope to Shinra! You gave Hope as a gift to the devil with Angel Vibe! I heard the stories about you being long gone for real, but I never imagined that you were truly are the ruler of the cosmos!

Godoka : ...for the last and 412th time that I keep telling everyone, there is no such thing as Ruler of the cosmos, only me that rulers of the multiverse and you a ruler of your realm aren't welcome to destroy the planet that I once protected a long time ago, along with Angel Vibe.

Homura Akemi : So you worked with Angel Vibe a long time and gave a man named Shinra hope from you. Why didn't you save him and his people before he and his beloved Iris was killed by the Time Eater?

Godoka : You hardly recognized that my friend, I knew that I saw the Time Eater came to the Ohkuboverse on day in 1000 years. Time Eater knew that Shinra was given hope to his people and his newly manifested world to bring heroism by spreading his influence, so your brother killed him and his beloved Iris, along with his people in order to stop the influenced that he spreaded from real world.

Homura Akemi : What? The Time Eater's...my brother?

Seto : So I guess the Time Eater's is not the father...but a brother to Homura Akemi?

Homura Akemi : Maybe you're right. So the Time Eater is, my creator and brother, uses a disguise that looks alike me, I know it's tough times for a girl to make myself popular one day. But I'm gonna change the subject with the usage of these.

Sonic : Hey, what are you going to do with those Chaos Emeralds!?

Homura Akemi : To re-arrange the events of the 2010s, I must make proper use that the Time Eater told me that i was going to fix everything. Now witness the power of a magical super that you have never seen before. Here goes, it's time for me to re-arrange the events!

Tabuu : You fool! What's gonna happen is that everything will be resetted! If you do that, then what's gonna happen to this universe...!

Homura Akemi : Is why that I born to recreate history, it's time for me put the past.

Time Eater (as Homura Akemi) : This should be worthy enough to erase these shenanigans of theirs. I will make great use of them. (The time stones appears around him)

*DBZ SFX : Energy Glowing*

Homura Akemi : Chaos...

Time Eater : Chaos....

Tabuu : YOU INCOMPETENT BRAAAAT!!!

Homura & Time Eater : [together] CONTROLLL!!!

*DBZ SFX : ENERGY CHARGING+WAVE*

[Is it Right? - Tai-Hey]

Homura Akemi : D...Did I do it? Am I going to fix everything that is right?

Time Eater : This is what I consider this a gift to you, I offering to save the Real World and rewrite history, we are not destined to meet each other in the next time, all these events that appeared will be re-written and re-arranged them into new events that are canonized to the excursion of saving the planets, the Galaxy, and the universe itself. I suggested that you Homura Akemi, younger sister of mine, has decided that you will become the next ruler of the universe, and smite the lies from Demon Vibe being ruler of the Ohkuboverse, I despised him for making the devil's influence spreading all over the world.

Homura Akemi : You would reconsider that as a term that whether there will be darkness in hearts of all, or there will be light within the hearts and souls for power. That's why you wanted Destroy the Ohkuboverse, the Ohkuboverse that was created was nothing more than a facade, a lie that was once existed within the Shadow Realm. Shinra and people were killed by you because of his influence, that's why Maka Albarn was the hero of the story of Soul World. She had been nothing more than a puppet on a string to Shinra's Kind the entire time. So what's gonna happen to Shinra and what's gonna happen...to all of those that live on earth!?

Time Eater : Speak to yourself. You know what's gonna happen when events of 2011 will be re-arranged and all of them shall make War of Shadow Realm exist as a conflict ever again. Rewrite the stories, retconning the plots, all of 2011 will be re-arranged and I'll be waiting for you. Just meet you to draw your last breath in the year 2013 A.D.

Homura Akemi : Okay, wish me luck. I'll see you there, Time Eater. But before you go, I want you give me one last request, I want you battle me! I want you to fight me in order to proven that who is best time traveler! So that's why I wanted to see you fight for real!

Time Eater : Okay! You have my word. Very Well, I will give you the challenge if you really wanted a challenge, then come and get me, Homura Akemi! I've waited for this a long time, a battle between two time-traveling relatives, and the winner shall be victorious to become those who traveled through time and space in each of the universe! With all Seven Emeralds, Seven Time Stones, and Seven World Rings, the hero will finally reach the end of his or her tale! (converts into it's disguise form as Homura herself) Come, Homura! And face your relative in the ultimate battle!

Homura Akemi : Bring it on, Time Eater! Let's get this over with and save 2011 for good!

"THE BATTLE BETWEEN TIME AND SPACE HAS BEGUN!"

~ 104th Scene : Battle For the Generations ~

[gloomycrayon]

Blog entry 04, 19th of January 24’

Darkness

falls upon the land.

Have you ever really and I mean, really really, thought about nothing. And I mean really, really submerged in it, into the infinite lack of everything, into the void. Have you ever, even for just a second, grasped the concept of the end of time, not just humanity, but the solar system, the milky way, our entire universe. Each and every single star and every constellation. Even further than that, the end of every universe ever and whatever more there is to it, the lack of e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. When there will be no one there to perceive, but also nothing to be perceived, when time won’t and will never be again? Have you? Because sometimes, if I really, really concentrate and try very hard to, for just the glimpse of a second, I begin to understand. Naturally, given the limited capacities of the human brain, I loose hold of it immediately and yet for that very glimpse of a second, the weight of it suffocates me.

Is this what has been discretely dressed (elegantly masked) with the euphemism ‘eternity’ throughout history? Would it even be of sense to use a word which postulates the existence and presence of ‘time’ for an entity which, by all means, lacks it completely? I once heard someone explain that time is merely a conceptual word used to describe and explain the changing of things as we know, or, knew them. However, following up on this definition, it would make time something that exists outside of the human and animal (while in my opinion there is no difference) experience. Naturally there would be no one there to actually perceive the changing of things from how they were to how their ought to be but nonetheless, it would still occur. According to the 2nd law of thermodynamics in modern physics, matter enclosed in a system undisturbed by impact of energy will always strive for higher entropy, meaning, the greater chaos. To live is to oppose this. We, as living beings, have been soldiers in an ongoing war against the greater chaos ever since the birth of the first life form 3,8 billion years ago and every day since then, we have won. Nevertheless, this is unimportant. As I said in the beginning, eternity experiences an utter lack of time, as it encapsulates the ceasing of both matter and light (energy). Change will not occur, as there is nothing to be changed, thus, time looses its meaning. This is a greater question than the question of death. However they share one very important quality: Both will, inevitably, occur. One to us, one to, well, everything.

Maybe this is the point and thereby final trajectory of this entry. We have to remember the doom of the universe: Eternity. This idea might already be familiar to you, but it is important to note that we are only able to grasp ideological concepts by the existence of their counterparts. We only understand presence because we have experienced lack, we only know to love because we have learned to hate, and we know to admire beauty because we have defined ugliness. I say this because if you have never allowed yourself to (even just for the glimpse of a second) grasp ‘Darkness’, how are you to cherish Light?

The monotony of life: the 4 walls of a living room, the dirty black windows of an old tube, empty coffee cups. Always the same, rigid, old routine. It is as though urbanisation and industrialisation have led us to forget an ancient song intrinsic to us, the lullaby Existence used to sing us to sleep to all but 3,8 billion years ago.

The entity i attempted to introduce you to in the beginning lacks both energy and matter. Lacks anything, everything really. And yet that is why we need it so desperately, that is the reason we mustn’t forget it. Because if we do not realise eternity, we fail to grasp existence, and the wonders of our world remain all but a mundane standard, all but simply there. Always have and always will be. Life will pass us by without meaning and we will never realise that wonders beyond our wildest imagination were right in front and within us the entire time. A single grain of sand holds the universe within its shell.

In its imperial mortality, all the universe asks of us in our mortality is to look at it. To see it, live it, marvel at its burning glory before it ceases from existence for evermore, just as we will to follow.

Love, A.l.