#on a more serious note I really did like how the episode handled it

[agentbluefox]

I feel like there is untapped comedic potential in the fact that Face’s only real serious girlfriend left him to become a nun.

[norrizzandpia]

can we get pt 2 of 34+35 where yn releases nonsense or positions, everyone is more confused because are we talking about the same guy?? in response all yn does is mention his thighs 💀💀

YES MAAM OFC I LOVE THIS STORYLINE

WHO IS OSCAR PIASTRI? (OP81)

Summary: Oscar and Y/n always loved to mess with the fans. Fortunately, the best way to do that is spill their sex life.

Warnings: sexual conversations, language

Note: THE THIGHS 😫😫😫😫😫 SO MANY WORDS NOT ENOUGH TIME 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

ynnn Nonsense out now! 💋

Comments:

osc81fan I- WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

piaosc ARE WE SURE ALL OF US ARE TALKING ABT THE CORRECT MAN?

- mclarenpiaandlan YEAH WTF HOW IS THIS OSCAR

mclarensgirlll SHE DID THIS LAST TIME AND WE NEVER RECOVERED

- landonorris ILL NEVER RECOVER.

oscarpiastri ITS ABOUT MEEEEEEEE 🤭🤭

- danielricciardo we are aware.

- maxverstappen i think youve said that enough

- charlesleclerc YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE LITTLE OSCAR 😰😰😰

- ynnn definitely not LITTLE oscar 😏

- alexalbon STOP.

——

ynnn maybe i lied? Lookin’ at him doesn’t have me thinkin’ nonsense, it has me thinkin…

Comments:

oscarpiastri my girlfriend everyone 😀

- mclarensgirlll hes probably giggling at his phone at this very moment

- landonorris and youd be right!

maxverstappen IM SO SCARED FOR MY LIFE

- danielricciardo WE CANT ESCAPE IT

- alexalbon HE PLAYS THE SONGS EVERYWHERE

- landonorris IT NEVER ENDS.

ln4andop81 anyone else curious abt what shes going to say on that podcast next week where theyre infamous for asking abt sex????

- oscpastry i bet you oscar will forever be changed for us

- mclarensgirlll he already is 🥲

——

TWITTER

ln4andop81 IN HONOR OF 24 HOURS BEFORE Y/NS PODCAST EPISODE, DROP THE MOST SHOCKING LYRICS FROM NONSENSE DOWN BELOW

- oscpastry “you said you like my eyes and you like the make em roll” SOOOO BASICALLY WHEN WERE THOSE WORDS FALLING FROM OUR BABY’S LIPS????

- mclarenpiaandlan REAL BECAUSE HOW DOES HE EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS 😭😭

- mclarensgirlll I THINK THE LYRIC “opposite of soft” LET US KNOW HE IS WAYYYY MORE EXPERIENCED THAN WE THOUGHT

- piaosc DOM OSCAR????? FUCKING HOW. IN. WHAT. WORLD.

- ynnn this world! 💋

- piaosc IS THIS SOME SORT OF GAME???

- mclarenpiaandlan THE PATTERN IS PATTERNING

- mclarensgirlll ITS SO ICONIC MY BRAIN CANT HANDLE IT

——

TWITTER

ln4andop81 hows everyone doing after that podcast….

- mclarensgirlll “WHO IS OSCAR PIASTRI?” trending on twitter makes me feel less alone after listening to Y/n’s tell all

- mclarenpiaandlan host: “whats your favorite body part of oscar’s?” Y/n: “his thighs” BY THEN I ALREADY KNEW WHAT WAS COMING BUT THE HOST HAD TO KEEP GOING host: *giggling* “why?” Y/n: “10 out of 10 for riding” I THINK MY BRAIN WENT DEAD FOR A SEC

- piaosc GIRLY KEPT GOING TOO host: “did you ask or, like, how did that come about?” Y/n: “well, he was just kind of sitting there, manspread ya know, and he caught on the minute he saw the way i was looking at him. Ive never see him so excited before.” *laughing* “i think he enjoys it more than me!”

- ln4andop81 no words. Host: “so he knows you like his thighs?” Y/n: “Oh my god, yeah! I hate him for it but he purposefully wears his shortest pair of shorts around the house so when he sits, that’s all I see. I’m telling you, Oscar knows how much I love his body and he knows EXACTLY how to use it.” Host: “what do you mean?” Y/n: “just that the shirtless photo i posted of him is one of many and the rest of them could not be up on the internet for longer than 5 seconds before being taken down because they’re borderline all pornographic” OSCAR???? BABY BOY??? WHO ARE YOU.

- mclarensgirlll BRO AND THEN host: “your new song, Nonsense, mentions things being more rough than soft. Is that really true with him?” Y/n: “Are you kidding?! The fans who think he’s super innocent and pure are in for some serious whiplash when i say that he is anything but that. He’s not Oscar when we’re in bed. He’s some alter ego who has no problem fucking against a random wall.” UHHHHHHHHHHH RUE WHEN WAS THIS????

- oscarpiastri now THAT is one thing i wont be answering 😊

- ynnn knowing myself ill probably reveal it in some song in the future 🤦🏼‍♀️

- mclaren maybe try and hold off on that one plz bestie 😙

- landonorris ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^🙏🏻

- danielricciardo ^^

- alexalbon ^^^

- maxverstappen ^

- charlesleclerc ^^^^

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

How do luffy nami and usopp react to reader saying they'd die for them

Hi Anon! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took so long. You didn't specify whether you wanted mini fanfics or headcanons so I went with the latter. Please note I am currently up to episode 574 (just finished Fishman Island Arc) of One Piece. I hope you like the headcanons!

Fandom: One Piece

Characters: Luffy, Nami, Usopp x gn! Reader (separate)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

How do the characters react when you say you would die for them?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I'll never let you be in that position. While I'm around, you'll never have to put yourself in so much danger."

Luffy is going to be the most serious you've ever seen his outside of battle. He has to make sure you know you're going to be safe when you're around him.

It means a lot to him that you feel so strongly but he couldn't bear to lose you, not after everything he's already been through.

In battle, he'll keep a close eye on his surroundings. He knows you can handle yourself so he just needs to make sure he's not in any danger and you'll be fine.

"Really? Aw, thanks! I'd die for you too you know. But how about we try to keep each other alive instead?"

Nami knows you're being serious but that it's also just a way of showing affection. She's willing to reciprocate the notion.

She's glad you're both open enough with your thoughts that you feel comfortable sharing that with her. It makes things a lot more comfortable both on the ship and in battle.

During battle, Nami will follow through with her words and help keep you safe. She knows you're helping her out as well so it's mutually beneficial.

"For me?! I mean, of course you would, I'm worth protecting with your life after all. Um, but please don't."

Usopp is deeply touched that you would be willing to die for him. He's got some pretty awful self esteem so your words mean a lot.

But at the same time, he's a bit overwhelmed but you bold statement. He doesn't want you to die and he wants you to know that, despite his "brave" facade.

Next time he's in battle, he'll try to stick by you as much as possible to make sure you're both safe. He's got your back if you've got his.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey, did you enjoy this? If you like my writing, please consider donating to my Ko-Fi page! This will allow me to make some money off my writing, something I enjoy doing.

ko-fi.com/justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms

Important Note: Please only donate if you are financially able to. If you are currently in a position where you can't donate, a like, comment or reblog will mean just as much.

[jellalism]

Wriothesley x GN!Reader fic: To soften the pain

You're in a depressive episode. Wriothesley comforts you.

Word count: 645

Genre: Comfort

Content warnings: Depression; mention of a meal.

Notes: Reader is gender neutral.

Read below or on AO3.

“Wriothesley?” You step through the large doors and move towards the stairs leading to his office. 

“Hi dear,” he responds before you’re even within his field of vision. When you’re high enough up the staircase, you look over the Duke’s desk. Wriothesley is sitting behind it, handling some papers, not looking up.

There’s a surprisingly large amount of paperwork that comes with running the Fortress. You once asked whether the amount of bureaucracy in the Fortress of Meropide couldn’t be reduced. After all, it’s an autonomous entity and is not required to follow the regulations of the Palais Ordalie. Wriothesley had laughed and explained that, even though it’s formally autonomous, the Fortress still collaborates with the Palais, and so must deliver the documents that it requires. Its bureaucracy is inescapable. You often find him in the position he is now, hunched over files.

He doesn’t look up as you enter the office. “What brings you here? Have something to ask, or did you just miss me?” His tone is light and teasing.

You’re not sure how to answer that. You did miss him, but it would be wrong to reduce the reason for your visit to just that.

At your silence, he finally gazes up at you and looks at your face. His expression grows serious and he stands up, walks to you, and places his strong hands on both your shoulders. “What’s wrong? You look exhausted.”

“I am.” You want to speak at a normal volume, but all your throat produces is a whisper. “I feel like shit.”

At those words, Wriothesley pulls you close. For a few moments, he doesn’t say anything; he just lets you soak in his warmth. He feels safe. “I’ll clear out the rest of my day for you. I want to be with you tonight.” He kisses the top of your head.

“Are you sure? You don’t have to go that far…”

“I want this too, you know. You’re not the only one who’s been missing their partner.” He holds you a little tighter. “Haah… I know it’s been only a few days, but I really wanted to hold you again like this.”

You smile slightly — something you haven’t done in a few days. “I missed you,” you mumble. Your voice is muffled as your face is buried in his chest.

“I missed you too, love.” His voice is soft and calming. With one hand, he plays with your hair. “Do you want to tell me what makes you feel so bad?”

You disentangle yourself a little bit from him so it’s easier to breathe and speak. “Not sure,” you mutter. “Sometimes, the depression just hits, you know? Well, maybe you don’t know. I hope you don’t know.”

“I don’t know, but I can imagine.” He still holds you in his embrace. “Is there anything I can do to make it easier? Anything, from a hug to the more practical things.” You’ve talked about depression with Wriothesley before, and he knows it makes it harder to take good care of yourself.

“Maybe… If it’s not too much trouble… You can help me clean the dishes?” It feels silly to ask for something stupid like this. What kind of pathetic loser needs help doing something so basic?

Instead of answering, Wriothesley lifts your chin and presses a kiss to your lips. “I see you talking yourself down. But nobody gets to insult my lovely partner. Not even you.” He sounds stern, but his smile is a teasing one. “I’ll help you clean the dishes and anything else you need. Later tonight. For now… How about we get something to eat above ground? I think you could use a good meal.”

You nod. He stands up, dragging you along with it. “Alright then. It’s a date night now. I promise you you’ll feel better by the end of the day.”

[vixymix101]

Why Bluey x Jean-Luc Works

So! Sense I've been in a Blueluc mood as of late, I'd like to make an extensive post on why I love this pairing, and why it works so well!

(Please note this is my personal opinion, and isn't meant to attack or shame other shippers who don't ship this pairing!)

Now! Let's begin!

First off, where did this pairing even begin?

Blueluc started after Jean-luc's first debut in the episode, Camping. His first and only major role in the show-- but this single episode was enough to spark one of the most popular ships in the Bluey fandom!

The first thing we learn about Jean-luc is that he speaks French and cannot understand English, but despite this language barrier, it doesn't deter these two from playing together and instantly hitting it off! They immediately start to connect without even understanding a word of what the other is saying.

It's just the fact that they connect and bond so fast and become such close buddies in such a short time span, if they get along that well in just a few days, who knows how much further their relationship could go and grow if they were able to spend more time with eachother.

A thing to take notice is we see the two build a little make-shift hut, and to me, feels like a metaphor of building a home together. Now it could be reachy but it's definitely something to take note of! They made something special together, something only for them.

But that isn't the only thing I'd like to point out--

Second case in point-- the touches--

These two are already so comfortable holding hands and making physical contact even after, what? A day or two? For most people it can take a few weeks, even months or years to be this comfortable with physical contact like this-- now yes, they are kids and kids usually don't really care but even so, it's still a big leap even for people their age--

Plus, it's just so adorable-- look at them!! Little bbys!! Holding hands!!

Another thing I'd love to point out is the tree and how it's a metaphor of their growing relationship.

While I could be reaching with the building-a-home metaphor, this one is undeniable meant to be a visual representation of their relationship with eachother, as it holds such a large role in the episode, but I'll go more into detail later after it's done growing!

For now, let's take a moment to point out why they get along so well, and how it'd work for any romantic relationship that may form for their future.

As we all know, Bluey is a bit bossy when she plays games with other kids-- that trait likely stems from the fact that she's a Heeler, a herding dog, which could explain why she feels the need to take charge.

And not to throw shade, but her personality type just doesn't mesh well with someone like Mackenzies-- they're both hard headed, stubborn and feel the need to take charge when they can. That headstrong attitude just wouldn't work well for a serious relationship.

But it does work for someone like Jean-luc, who was more than happy to follow along with her games, simply just wanting to play and have fun, not even being told what to do-- just saw that Bluey was collecting sticks and went to help her and play with her.

I'm not saying that he's a "follower" by any means, but I am saying is that he's willing to accommodate with her, a true gentleman I must say! Just a wittle sweetie!

(Plus again, they got so close so quickly and easily--)

And that's not to say Bluey doesn't do the same in return! Again, she can get pretty bossy when she plays, so I think it's worth pointing out how well she handled the minor miscommunications she has with Jean-luc is a pretty big thing for her-- instead of getting upset at Jean-luc or stop playing with them because they can't understand eachother, she instead shrugs it off, and comes up with a way where they can both understand eachother via the drawing on the rock!

She was willing to think of a different way to communicate and get over their misunderstanding so Jean-luc could get it. Most people don't do that, especially for someone they've only known for around a week--

Now, let's talk about THIS scene, now this? This just simply broke my heart on first watch, and even harder on rewatches--

It truly amazes me how they fit so much genuinely good chemistry between two characters in the span of a single episode that most shows can't even do in the span of 2 seasons--

The writers truly out did themselves, there's a good reason so many people cry at this scene and after--

Speaking of after! The time skip!

Now ik many debate if this scene is even canon but there isn't any indicator it isn't a flash forward, so I'd say it very much happened.

Now remember that tree I was talking about earlier? Here's where we pick up where that left off--

It shows that their relationship stayed strong even when they were apart, the tree fully grown and in bloom, symbolizing how their relationship only grew with time, even as they got older.

It's one of my favorite aspects about the episode, and my favorite piece of symbolism for these two.

I could go on and on about them and why their relationship just simply works, but I think just simply watching the episode will do all the talking for me-- that and the fact this is the most popular ship in the fandom lol--

But I think I've made all my points clear! If you'd like to discuss further, go for it!

Thank you for reading!

[valentineforlemonandcherry]

Joke's On You Part 23

When Fred Weasley carelessly bumps into you into the hallway, you decide to take him a notch down; not by berating him, but by showing him up at his own game of using your charm and intellect to get what you want. And it’s fine if the end result doesn’t leave everyone quite satisfied - in fact, that’s what you want…

[Fred Weasley x Reader.] [Warning: Story Contains Explicit Smut.] [Warning: Non-Consent.] [Warning: Manipulation.] [Warning: Humiliation.] [Warning: Light Bondage.] [Warning: Slight Voyeurism/Exhibitionism.]

Note: Part 23 does not contain any smut.

Note: This is the official last chapter for Joke's On You. The reason why it took so long to release this is because I couldn't stop writing more episodes of Fred and Reader one-upping each other and falling in love. I basically cut out about five extra chapters of their time together, but I felt for story purposes (pacing) that it was time to bring this story home. At some point, I will release the extra chapters, but for now, I really hope you enjoy the finale of Joke's On You. Thank you for sticking with the story, and especially to the original readers that encouraged me to keep going. How funny is it to think that it all started from a one-shot?

*Please do not repost or copy my work without my permission. Thank You!

⍟ Click Here for Joke’s On You Home Page (All Chapter Links) ⍟

As soon as you woke up the next morning, you felt a wonderfully light feeling in your heart. Smiling, you murmured, “Fred? Can you show me how to get to the kitchens? I loved those heart-shaped pancakes that they had yesterday, and I want more.”

There was no reply.

Maybe he already woke up and left. Although that would be odd. He never wakes up before me. You sat up in the bed and turned your head.

Sure enough, Fred was up. He was sitting on the other side of the bed and staring at the wall.

Confused, you waved your hand in front of his face. “Um, Fre - ?”

Fred grabbed your hand and gripped it hard.

You started, surprised. But sensing that this was serious, you quickly got a hold of yourself. “What’s wrong? Are you ill? I’m right here. I’ll help - ”

Fred shook his head furiously. “No, this isn’t about me.”

“Then what? Tell me.”

“You tell me – what is this?” Fred turned your hand towards you, so that you were looking at the back of your hand. Your heart jumped, for you saw that the bandage was half torn-off, and there was still the dark red scar, spelling out the words, I will repent for my irresponsibility.

Fred growled, “What the hell is this? Who did this to you? Just give me the name, and I swear to Merlin - ” You pulled your hand away and pressed the loose end of the bandage down.

Fred’s usual cheerful eyes were blazing with fury. His shoulders were extremely tense, his jaw taut, his mouth pulled into a serious frown that even you had never seen before. In short, his entire demeanor spelled murder for whoever had caused this.

You knew that Fred, much like yourself, did not respond well to being told what to do. So, you tried to defuse the situation by keeping your own energy as calm as possible. You kept your voice steady as you said, “It’s not a big deal - ”

“Not a big deal!” Fred suddenly exhaled, as if to stop himself from exploding any further. Still, his voice was angry enough as he exclaimed, “You’re hurt! What the hell happened?”

You fell silent. I don’t want Fred to know that it’s Umbridge. If I tell him, he’ll retaliate, and I don’t want him to get into any more trouble. What if Umbridge gives Fred the same detention she gave me? I couldn’t bear seeing these marks on Fred, and the thought that it would be my fault makes me feel physically sick. Finally, you said quietly, “It’s my right to decide whether to tell you something or not. This was something I could handle by myself, okay?”

Fred was completely taken aback by this. “What? You – You don’t want me to know?”

You saw Fred’s brow furrow, and an entirely different kind of anger – one that was shot through with hurt - began to take place inside of him. Oh no, he’s misunderstanding. He thinks that I don’t trust him. Trying not to hurt Fred’s feelings, but unwilling to confess what happened, you said, rather hesitantly, “It’s not that I don’t know want you to know, necessarily…” You reached out to him, trying to touch his face.

Fred avoided your hand. Drawing back, he looked at you with a complicated gaze. “Then what? I said I’ll keep you safe. Don’t you remember? I promised you. So why aren’t you telling me when something’s bad happened to you? When someone’s hurt you? What good am I if you can’t trust me right now?”

Your heart thumped painfully in your chest. You scooted up to Fred’s side. “I do trust you,” you said softly. “It’s just…” Your voice faded away, and you reached for Fred again, slowly, so that he could reject you if he wanted. But Fred, with a soft sigh, reached for you, too, and he pulled you into a tight hug. The second you were in his arms, you knew you were safe. You breathed out slowly. Oh my god… I’m home. Your heart kept thumping heavily in your chest, so much so that you wondered if Fred could feel it against his own chest. In your mind, you prayed, Please don’t let me hurt Fred. I know he’s only trying to help me. But this isn’t his battle to fight. Besides, he has his future already lined up for him – 93 Diagon Alley. That’s where he should go, and soon. And I can’t follow him there. I only want to make the sweetest of memories with Fred. I don’t want there to be pain between us. Please, Merlin, keep him from any pain. You whispered, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, and I’m really sorry it startled you this morning. But I wasn’t hurt, and it wasn’t a big deal. I promise.”

Fred loosened his hug just enough to be able to see your face. You managed to smile at him, but he could tell that you weren’t completely there. You saw a thousand thoughts flash through Fred’s eyes, but he chewed on his lower lip before he finally said, “Let’s go to the hospital wing.”

You cocked your head at him. “Why? It’s all healed. The scabs look awful, I know, but they’ll disappear in a week or so - ”

“I’d rather they be gone now,” Fred said, a tinge of his anger bleeding into his words.

You touched his cheek. “Please don’t be so angry with me,” you whispered. “It’s hard enough without you being mad at me.”

Fred blinked. ���Huh? I’m not - Why in the world would I be mad at you?”

“Then you’re not yourself.” You pressed your hand against his cheek. “Come back.”

Fred slowly let out a breath. You shifted forward, nestling back into him.

“I’m not mad at you,” Fred said, speaking softly now. “Sorry if it came off that way. It’s just that the thought of someone hurting you is – is kind-of unbearable. And the thought of you having that insane nonsense on your body is driving me a little crazy.” He blinked at you. “Don’t you want it gone?”

You hesitated. Of course I do, but I can stick it out. I’m past the worst of it, anyways.

Seeing you considering, Fred quickly negotiated, “If you let me take you the hospital wing, I’ll show you how to get into the kitchens.”

At this, you brightened. “Heart-shaped pancakes?”

“With strawberries.”

“Let’s go!” you cheered enthusiastically.

Fred gave you a half-smile, and he stood up from the bed while still holding you. In fact, he insisted on carrying you up to the hospital wing like a princess.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

When Madam Pomfrey spotted Fred carrying you in, she bustled out of her office at once. “What is it? Broken leg? Broken foot?”

“Er, no…” You held up your hand.

“Broken hand?”

“Not quite.”

Madam Pomfrey was very confused when you explained that your ‘injury’ consisted only of some scratches on the back of your hand because Fred had carried you in so carefully that anyone would have guessed that you had suffered a serious injury that hindered your ability to walk.

Madam Pomfrey cautiously suggested, “Well, if it’s healing fine on its own, then - ”

Fred cut in, “Could you just look at it?”

Madam Pomfrey looked from you to Fred, then back to you.

You gave her a small smile. “Please?”

Madam Pomfrey sighed. “Fine. Let me see.”  

However, when Madam Pomfrey peeled away the bandage and recognized the words on the back of your hand as dried cuts, her mouth turned into a thin line. “It’s healed nicely, but we can certainly do more to… complete the healing cycle. Just one moment, dear.” She left to retrieve a Potion.

As you settled down on the hospital bed, you noticed Fred glaring furiously at your hand. You slowly covered the scars with your other hand. Trying to keep the mood light-hearted, you reminded him, “Now, remember, you’re to show me where the kitchens are after this. I want those heart-shaped pancakes.”

Fred let out a hard breath. “Fine, yes.” He started to pace beside your bed, when suddenly, he whirled around. “Was it Malfoy? It was, wasn’t it? That greasy little git. That’s why he was pressing himself up all over you that one evening, whispering some stupid shit into your ear. I swear to Merlin, Godric, and all the holy ancestors, he’ll pay for this.” He sprang up onto his feet, with his hands already balled up into fists.

“No!” You hurriedly reached over and yanked Fred to you, pulling him down onto the bed beside you. “It wasn’t Malfoy. Stop jumping to conclusions.”

“I’m not jumping to anything,” Fred retorted. He started to say something else, but Madam Pomfrey had returned.  

“Weasley, step away,” she instructed. “None of that in my hospital wing.”

“We weren’t doing anything bad,” you said honestly.

“Well, you’re too close together for my liking,” Madam Pomfrey said, setting the potion down on the tray beside your bed.

“Is he?” you mused. Fred started to move away from you.

Knowing that Fred had every intention of finding Draco, you reached out and grabbed his hand tightly in yours. When Madam Pomfrey shot you a look, you smiled brightly at her. “I’m sorry, Madam Pomfrey, but I like having him near me. He’s my boyfriend, you see, and I feel better when he’s next to me.”

Madam Pomfrey shook her head and barely kept from rolling her eyes, but she let you hold Fred’s hand as she treated the scars on the back of your other hand. Meanwhile, you mouthed at Fred, “Don’t you go anywhere.” Fred sighed, for he recognized that you were keeping him from going after Draco, but he couldn’t help except to listen to you and stay there, letting you clutch his hand as Madam Pomfrey treated you.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Fred kept to his promise and took you down to the kitchens. You gasped in delight when you saw the tower of heart-shaped pancakes that the house elves had made. They were just about to send them up to the kitchens, but they were happy to shave a couple off of the top for you. In turn, the house elves were thrilled that you took such joy in them and they began to tell you about all of the other foods that they could make heart-shaped versions of.

“Chocolates, misses, and fruits!”

“Amazing! And what else?”

“Sandwiches, miss. We can make sandwiches all heart-shaped if we want to, miss.”

“That’s wonderful. How about cakes?”

“Oh, those are the easiest - cakes and biscuits and the like!”

“Well, that’s just delightful,” you said, and all of the house elves beamed at you.

A tiny, quite young house elf crept up to you and whispered, with his big eyes bulging, “Would missus like a heart-shaped cake?”

You smiled at him. “Oh no, that’s all right, I don’t want to trouble you - ”

“It’s no trouble! Breakfast is done now, and Kippy has a whole hour before lunch work begins.” With that, the house elf went zooming off.

You looked up at Fred with wide eyes. “I didn’t mean to make him bake a whole heart-shaped cake just for me.”

Fred chortled. “Yeah, you’ve got to be careful what you say to house elves.”

Only fifteen minutes later, you had a glorious heart-shaped cake in your hands, topped with luscious, whipped cream and garnished with pink and red heart sprinkles and fresh strawberries. You thanked Kippy so much that he burst into tears and Fred had to pull you away.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

After that cheerful breakfast, you and Fred headed back up to your dormitory room, where you set the cake carefully on your desk. You turned around to see Fred sitting on the edge of your bed, still looking a bit moody. You sighed quietly. He’s not going to let this go, is he? He’s trying to be considerate, but it’s really bothering him.

You walked up to him. When Fred looked at you, you ran your hands through his hair and then pulled him towards you into a warm, loving kiss. Fred put his hands on your waist and kissed you back, all the while pulling you into his lap. “Mm,” you murmured softly, as you traded kisses with Fred. Then, you whispered in a low voice, “Are you always so intense when you’re angry?”

Fred scrunched his face. “What? I’m not being intense. I’m holding back.”

“I know you are, but you’re still… very intense.”

“I’m just – I don’t want to pressure you but – What am I supposed to do if you don’t trust me?” 

You nuzzled his cheek with your nose, as you confessed, “I trust that you’ve got my best interests at heart and I trust that you’ll protect me, but I also trust that you’re going to fully lean into your pranking, thieving, and generally deceitful skills to get said justice - ”

“- Well, sure - ” Fred agreed instantly.

You tapped your finger on the end of his nose as you finished, “ - And I don’t want you to go and do something foolish just because of me. I would hate that so much.”

Fred lifted his eyebrow at you. “I think you underestimate my ability to be stealthy. Not everyone is as good at catching me in the act as you, hellcat.”

You laughed lightly. “True, but my point still stands.”

Fred sighed. “Morals are too inconvenient. When will you learn that?”

“Really?” you said, in a voice of mock innocence. “I find that morals are only ever convenient. Take repentance, for example – that’s an excellent moral value, and I found it very convenient on New Year’s Day.” As you spoke, you gently stroked his wrists, reminding him all too clearly that you’d had great fun tying him up that night and seeing him squirm all over his bed in his stupid little pajamas…

“All right, all right,” Fred said, annoyed.

You giggled and made to stand up, when Fred suddenly slipped his hands out, only to grab your wrists instead. Keeping you in his lap, he said, “Can I just ask you one thing?”

You nodded.

“Those words – you know they aren’t true, right?” Searching your gaze, Fred pressed, “I mean, those words didn’t actually affect you, right? You didn’t repent for anything, right?”

You hesitated. “No, I… didn’t repent for anything.” But even you could hear the uncertainty in your reply.

Fred growled, and he squeezed your wrists.

Ah, no, why did I have to sound so uncertain? you admonished yourself.

“Fred, no,” you said hurriedly, trying to rectify your slip-up. “I didn’t repent, okay?”You slipped your hands away and then quickly hugged Fred around his neck. “So don’t worry about it. Please.”

Fred could feel how tightly you were clutching onto him, and he realized that you were genuinely worried about what he might do if you were honest with him. I’m trying to protect her, but she’s getting anxious because of me. I have to calm down. He took a deep breath and tried his best to relax. “Fine,” he muttered.

“Good,” you whispered, petting him lightly at the nape of his neck. “Thank you.”

“But you listen to me,” Fred said. “You can keep me in the dark all you want, but I will find out about what happened, and then – it’s a free-for-all, all right?”

“No,” you stressed, and you bit Fred on the shoulder. “Bad boy.”

Fred winced slightly, but he muttered, “That doesn’t work on me anymore. Remember, I’m your boyfriend and not your boy toy.”

Laying your head on his shoulder, you blinked up at him and said softly, “Does that mean you’re immune to my pleas, then?”

Fred looked down at you, and his gaze fell on your honest, sweet expression – or so it appeared, anyhow. He could also recognize the glimmer of mischief hidden away in your seemingly innocent eyes, and he saw the cute little half-truths just waiting to fall from your soft, pretty lips. God damn it, why does she have to look like a fucking angel when she’s trying to manipulate me?

Your lips barely moved, as you whispered, “You didn’t answer me, baby. Does nothing I do charm you anymore? Isn’t there anything I do that still excites you or am I going to have to tie you up and spank you to - ?”

Fred cut you off with a sudden kiss.

“Mmpfh! Ah…” you moaned. Your head tilted back slightly, and Fred reached over and grasped the back of your neck, holding you to him as he kissed you fervently.

A long minute passed, and when Fred paused, you were both breathless. Fred muttered, in-between rather ragged breaths, “Shut up. You know I’m still head over heels for you, so shut the hell up.” He rested his forehead against yours, and you felt his breath pass pleasantly across your cheeks.

You laughed lightly, though your breath caught a little. “Wow, I didn’t expect you to admit it just like that. In fact, I’m a little disappointed.”

“What d’you mean?” Fred asked, opening one eye to give you a skeptical glare. “Weren’t you trying to squirm a confession out of me? Isn’t that what you live for, you little hellcat?”

“Mm, no,” you said honestly. “Actually, I was getting rather excited about the prospect of having an excuse to tie you up and spank you properly. I do miss having you on a leash, you know, and seeing you pant like a little puppy for me. You have the cutest little mouth when you pant.” You paused and suddenly pressed your thigh against Fred, and he let out a sharp exhale. You smiled sweetly at him. “Like that.” You gave Fred another kiss, ignoring his now rather icy gaze. “You’re so cute,” you whispered to him, kissing his cheeks all over.

“Whenever I think you’ve given up on your nonsense, it comes roaring right back again,” Fred sighed, shaking his head a little.

“As if you have a leg to stand on, with your stupid pranks,” you mumbled, still pressing kisses across his cheeks. “And may I point out that my so-called ‘nonsense, which is actually brilliance, is kept private, between two willing participants, whereas your dumb pranks implicate innocent bystanders, like the professors and other students.”

“Nope,” Fred said, rejecting your argument, while letting (and rather liking) how fervently you were kissing him all over. “In your case, I’m the innocent bystander getting sucked in.”

“That’s definitely not true,” you breathed out, as you nudged your way down to then press your lips against his neck. “I always ask for consent. The whole fun of it is watching you shamefully beg for me. That requires that you say ‘yes’… just, I prefer you on your knees, blushing and sobbing as you do it.” You sat up again and looked at Fred with an innocent gaze. “Is that really so bad?”

Fred’s eyes fell to your lips, which were quite pink now, from having kissed him so much. Feeling himself flush, Fred resolutely looked away from you.

Knowing that you had the upper hand in this argument by his silence, you smiled cheekily at Fred and you ran your finger teasingly down his chest. “So, you’re still head over heels for me, eh?”

“Shuddup,” Fred grunted, and then he all but shoved you off of his lap.

“Fred!”

 Fred got up, ignoring your grumbles about “being treated like a sack of potatoes.” Just then, he spotted something on your floor. He leaned over and picked up a tiny pink feather. “Oh look, from your glorious canary days.”

“Huh?”

Smirking, Fred waved the feather in your face. “You made for a good bird.”

You frowned at the feather. “I don’t recall any such horrendous event,” you said flatly. “

Fred grinned. “You really did squawk like one, it was great. Lee and George were highly impressed with you. They told me to offer you a position in our little crew – as our mascot.”

 You flicked the feather out of his hand. “The three of you could never handle me.”

“Well, not as a human being, no,” Fred replied immediately. “But that’s why we think that it would work out better when you’re a bird. The offer’s conditional on you being a bird.”

A mascot… For their shop. You absent-mindedly ran your fingers through your hair.

Fred paused, realizing how quiet you were. “What, no comeback? No witty retort? Finally ran out of them, have you? Took you long enough.”

“Only you would think that they were witty. It’s just normal conversation for me, Fred. I’m sorry you find it hard to keep up.”

Fred’s mouth fell open.

You giggled at how stupid he looked. You got up from the bed and stretched. “Let’s do something fun today.”

“Like what? Not studying,” Fred replied mockingly.

“No,” you said sincerely.

“Then what?”

You thought about it, tapping your finger on your lips. “Hm…”

“Do you want to pray or commit a conspiracy?” Fred asked, coming over and lowering his head to peer into your face. “With you, both are equally possible.”

You smiled at this. “And would you help me do either one?”

Fred grimaced. “I prefer the latter, but sure, if you insist, and if…” He ran his hands lithely along your waist and hips. “… you make it worth my while.”

You shrugged. “I can make you cum without even taking my clothes off, so that’s easy.” Annoyed, Fred started to retort, when you decided, “I want to learn how to make a firework.”

Fred paused, honestly surprised. “Really?”

“Yes.” You looked up at Fred, tilting your head. “Will you teach me?”

Fred grinned, and to your relief, you saw his usual, overly confident spirit flare up again. “Teach you? Yeah, baby, I was born for this.”

Good, you thought, I’ve distracted him from the marks on my hand. Thank Merlin.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Fred told you to go down to the grounds and wait for him. Meanwhile, he went up to his dormitory room to gather a few supplies. George and Lee were both there. When Fred entered, George said, “Good timing. Need you to sign a form.” He thrust a piece of parchment forward, and Fred caught it. It read, “Final Release Form for Lease for 93 Diagon Alley.”

“Once the owners confirm this contract, we can start moving in right away,” George said. “That gives us about two weeks to prepare everything. Sound good?”

Fred took the parchment over to his desk and signed it. “Yeah, that sounds… great.” He handed George back the parchment. Then, he started to gather items for fireworks and put them all in a big bag.

George and Lee exchanged looks.

“Fred,” George called.

“What?”

“How come you’ve got all that fireworks stuff?”

“I’ve got an interested customer.”

“In our raw materials?” George frowned, confused.  

“Yep.”

“What kind-of customer is that?” Lee chortled. “Maybe it’s someone interested in straight-up arson. Be careful, Fred.”

“Arson, blackmail, conspiracy – I’d say she’s already an expert in all that stuff,” Fred agreed. “Anyways, I’d better get going. Antsy customer, y’know. Don’t want her to change her mind.”

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

When you saw Fred coming towards you, you stood up and smiled at him. “There you are. I was wondering what was taking you so long – Fred? Fred! Fred!” You screamed as Fred lit up a firework in his hand and promptly began running towards you.

Fred laughed as he chased you with a firework. You were not in the least amused and dashed about, screaming, “Fred Weasley! You put that down! Down, I said!”

“You shouldn’t put a firework down,” Fred said smartly. “Else you’ll blow up the ground! Like you did, when you dropped that firework and stranded yourself in a tree, stupid.”

You flushed, and you meant to retort, but you were too busy dodging Fred, running this way and that. Godric, he’s fast! you thought, puffing as you reached the limit of your stamina. Guess he’s not a Quidditch player for no reason. Stupid, lanky Fred Weas - Aargh!

“Gotcha!” Fred reached out and grabbed your arm. You squirmed and tried to slip out of his grasp, but Fred, with a hard grunt, anchored you to his side. Finally, keeping you safely tucked against him, Fred let the firework go. It flew into the air and exploded in a puff of harmless smoke and sparkles. You coughed and flailed about dramatically as smoke enveloped you for a moment.

“Calm down,” Fred said, rolling his eyes at you. 

Instead, you rummaged in your pocket and pulled out a familiar piece of cloth.

Fred recognized it at once. “Hey, isn’t that the smoke-free cloth I used to carry around with me?”

With the cloth over your nose and mouth, you replied, “Yes. You gave it to me, remember? You set off those fireworks as an excuse to pull me aside.” As the smoke cleared, you took the cloth away and smirked at Fred. “And then you begged me to let you make love to me.”

“I don’t remember any such thing,” Fred replied.

You came over to Fred and playfully stroked the side of his face with the cloth. “Oh, but I do. You were so desperate, so needy. Your eyes were all bright with want, and I swear to Merlin that you were blushing, like some lovesick little puppy.”

“I was not,” Fred retorted, scoffing. He made a grab for the cloth, but you darted away, quick as a whip, and danced out of his reach. Shooting him a wicked, sly grin, you sang, “You begged me, you said, please, oh please, won’t you at least look my way? Won’t you let me make love to you?” Coming back to him, you slung the cloth around his neck and recounted brightly, “And when I said no, you cried.”

“You’re totally making this up, you loon,” Fred said, grabbing your hand to stop you from wrapping the cloth around his neck. “Anyways, c’mon, I’ll show you how to make a firework.” As he pulled you along, he looked back at you and remarked, with a merry glint in his eye, “And you better listen to me, else you might end up stranded in a tree again, kitty.”

You scowled. “Will you let that go, Weasley?”

Fred shot you a grin and chirped, “Nope. Not in a million, billion, trillion, bajillion years. Now, come along.”

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Fred led you into an open glade in the Forbidden Forest. The glade was large enough that the fireworks wouldn’t catch on any trees, yet the trees surrounding the area were high enough to ensure that any lit fireworks wouldn’t be seen by anyone at the castle.

“All right.” Fred pushed up his shirt sleeves and pulled out a number of items from a large bag that he’d brought.

Oh my, he has nice arms, you thought. You also found yourself admiring how bright his ginger hair looked as it fluttered about in the bright sunlight and light wind. Mm, he’s a cute one, all right.

“There’s some basic rules that hardly need saying…” Fred paused, as he caught you staring at him. With a proud smirk, he continued, “But I guess I’ll say them anyways, since I’m evidently so good-looking.”

“Hm?” you said thoughtlessly.

“Pay attention so you don’t blow your own head off,” Fred said, and he patted the ground next to him. “This is serious stuff, y’know. Not like studying.” You squatted down next to him and put your chin in your hands.

“First off, no matter what, don’t let the gunpowder mix with anything else and make sure the compartments inside the firework structure are tightly fitted. Second, don’t ever point the firework tip at yourself.” Fred looked over at you. “Got it?”

“Sure,” you said dreamily, resting your chin in your hand. “I’ll make sure to point it at you.”

Fred reached over and flicked your forehead. “Stop being a smart ass, I’m trying to teach you something important here.” He shook his head.

You hid your pleased smile behind your hand, as you felt ever so pleased with how seriously Fred took fireworks and how un-seriously he was taking you. Still, when Fred started to construct the first firework, you rolled up your own sleeves and paid close attention.  

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     * 

Three hours later, there was a pretty pile of fireworks on the ground, all of which you and Fred had put together. Working in the late afternoon sun, you were both sweating quite a bit and had all sorts of dust and powder streaking your hands and faces, but you couldn’t be happier.

At one point, your hair flew into your face, and Fred paused when he heard a loud, “thbwtt-tt” as you tried to spit your hair out. He came over and messily tied your hair back. You looked awful, with half your hair up and half your hair down, and your part all messed up, but you didn’t care one whit.

At another point, you noticed that you were running out of the pink coloring agent for your firework, so you went over to Fred’s bag and began to rummage around. To your confusion, you pulled out a top hat.

“Fred?” you called. “What’s this?”

Fred practically bounced over to you, excited as all hell, as he announced, “That’s my latest invention! Look!” He grabbed it from you and put it on his head. Then, he lifted it –

“Nothing’s there,” you said.

Fred held up a finger and then poked you in the cheek. “Patience, you.” He set the hat down and lifted it again. You gasped, as a rabbit appeared, blinking awake. It looked right at you and began to twitch its nose and whiskers. Fred set the hat down, and lifted it again – and the rabbit was gone. Your mouth dropped open.

“Nice, eh? It took a good bit of Charms work to figure it all out, and George, Lee, and I had a hell of time asking Flitwick for help without letting him know what we were up to.” Fred grinned at you and spun the top hat on his finger, clearly showing off.

“That’s marvelous!” you said, awed.

“Thought you’d like it,” Fred said, as he carefully put the top hat away.

“So, you’re not against cute inventions?”

Fred looked back at you, confused. “What kind-of question is that? A good prank’s a good prank – whether it’s cute or not, who cares?”

“Really?” You clasped your hands together.

“Yeah, really.” Fred cocked his head at you. “What’s going on in that head of yours, hellcat?”

“Well, I was just thinking...” You sidled up to Fred, putting your arms around his shoulders. “That you could develop a whole line of products centered around cuteness and love.”

“Whoa, whoa,” Fred said. “I said I don’t care about whether a prank’s cute, I didn’t say that I’d want to purposefully make stuff cute.”

“Just listen for a second,” you said, squeezing him in your hug. “Imagine a range of love potions, all decorated with sparkly charms and - ” you caught sight of Fred’s expression and quickly amended, “all right, forget the sparkly charms. But imagine love potions, only they’re hidden in chocolates, or else a love potion that seems to act fine, but then gives the drinker a comical voice. Or maybe daydream potions, where the drinker drinks it and they get to be in a little lovey-dovey world of their own for ten minutes, or – or – oh my gosh, you could sell Pygmy Puffs! Most pet stores don’t sell them because of how little and pesky they can be - ”

“Kind of like you?” Fred said dryly.

“But I’ve always wanted one! They’re so cute,” you said, now completely lost in your own thoughts.

“I don’t know if they would fit with the rest of our products, though,” Fred said.

You looked up at him and said softly, “For me?”

Fred meant to scoff, but he found himself pausing because, despite your exuberant voice and cheerful smile, your eyes were strangely… sad. He blinked. What…? He suddenly wondered, even though he knew it was nonsensical of him to think this - Does she know? Does she know that George and I are planning to leave in just a couple of weeks?

No, she can’t know, he thought quickly. The only way she would know is if she found our order form, but if she’d gotten her hands on one of those, she would have reported us already. And yet, there you were, with that soft knowing smile that told Fred that you would always be one step ahead of him. Shit, does she already know, and that’s why she’s being so soft today?

You tugged lightly at his arm. “Fred?”

“What?”

“I’m not saying you really have to do it. I’m just saying – if you’re ever bored, you could maybe think about it.”

“Uh, sure,” Fred replied. He tried to look once more at your face, but you ducked your head and instead placed a kiss on his chest.

“Anyways, a couple of more fireworks, and we should have a good show on our hands!” you said excitedly, and you bounded away from him and back towards the fireworks.

There was one tiny little mishap, however, when the hot sun began to heat up all of the fireworks, and your very first firework, which unfortunately had a tiny slit between the compartments, allowing the gunpowder and the other agents to mix a little, began to sputter.

Fred heard it first, for he recognized that soft spt-t-t-t sound all too well. He, George, and Lee had all heard it a million times before. He raced over to you and yanked you back from the pile.

“Fred - ?”

“Sh!” He looked carefully at the pile and noticed a tiny firework about to take off. He hurriedly pointed his wand at it. “Wingardium Leviosa!”

The firework rose into the air, away from the other fireworks. Then – POOF!  It went off in a cloud of pink fumes and sparkles. You shouted in surprise as Fred deftly held you in front of him as a shield. “AH!”

As you found soot raining down all over you, you suddenly realized, “Did you just use me as a shield?”

Fred immediately let go of you and ran swiftly to the other side of the meadow. You grabbed an empty bottle and threw it after him, but he was long gone. You yelled after him, “You jerk!”

“Hey, I saved you!” Fred yelled back breathlessly, still keeping a safe distance from you. “You were about two seconds away from having your top blown off!” He paused. “Although, I guess I wouldn’t have minded that too much. You do have a very nice set of tits – ouch!” A second bottle, courtesy of you and your fabulous right arm, had sailed through the air and knocked Fred right on his clever little head.

“Aw, c’mon,” Fred groaned, rubbing his head. “It was a joke – or a mistake – or whatever you want to call it, but don’t get mad.”

“I’m not.” As you spoke, you started to carefully set up a line of fireworks, all pointing towards Fred.

“Hey, hey,” Fred began, holding his hands up. “You just said you wouldn’t get all pissy!”

“And I’m not,” you confirmed. “I never get mad and I certainly do not get pissy.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Then what the hell are you doing now?”

Setting the last firework in place, you stood up and put your hands on your hips. Staring expressionlessly at Fred,  you said quite matter-of-factly, “Cool, calculated murder. Got a problem with that?”

Fred crossed his arms back at you. “You wouldn’t.”

“The situation says otherwise,” you supplied dryly.

“What would you do without me, hellcat?” Fred challenged you.

“I’d carry on per usual,” you said flatly. “How do you think I’ve lived after I’ve killed off all the boytoys before you?”

“The – The boytoys before me?” Fred sputtered, suddenly quite disarmed.

“Poor suckers. I killed them all, one by one. I had to, of course. For my reputation. No boytoy is worth my future.”

Fred paused, shifting back and forth on his feet. But then, he planted his feet firmly on the ground and said knowingly, “Nah, but I’m different.”

“Are you?”

“Yeah. You’d miss me too much to be able to kill me.” Fred smirked at you. “I’m the most fun you’ve had since you were born. I know you, you stick-in-the-mud, goody-two-shoes weirdo. You’d miss me for sure if you killed me. Like a hero without a villain, or an artist without a muse.”

You scoffed. “As if. Why would I miss you?”

Fred began to scowl, and then to pout.

Oh, I can’t tease him when he looks all upset, you thought. With a soft sigh, you relented, “I’m not going to miss you when I’m going to be waiting for you, right on the other side, silly. Did you forget that I’m an angel?”

Fred’s pout disappeared, as he realized that the only reason you weren’t going to miss him was because you were going to be with him there, too. You bit the inside of your cheek, trying to stop a smile from spreading over your face in reply.  

Just then, an unexpected voice sounded out. “Oh, was there a planned execution? I must’ve missed it on my calendar.”

You whirled around to see Lee and George strolling into the meadow. George was carrying an empty bag in one hand, and Lee was carrying - You gasped upon seeing the familiar creature in Lee’s arms. “I thought it was confiscated!”

“He,” Lee corrected you, lifting up the niffler. “And he was, but we got him back.”

“How?”

“Not important.”

George put down the bag and pulled out his wand. He pointed his wand at the fireworks, all of which moved to point upwards at the sky, instead of towards Fred.

“Thanks, mate,” Fred said, and he loped back towards you, George, and Lee.

“What happened to you?” George asked, looking you up and down, as you were entirely covered in soot.

“Better not to ask - ” Fred began.

“Him,” you cut in, while pointing a furious finger at Fred. “He happened to me.”

“And that’s why you pointed all those fireworks at him?” Lee guessed.

You nodded, and Lee laughed as he watched you glare at Fred, still annoyed.

“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” Fred scoffed. He reached over and pinched your cheek. “I did save you. Besides, you look like a grumpy old toad when you pull that face and I’m sick of looking at it.”

You let out a long breath. “Oh, fine.” You sidled up to him, as if to make nice with him, but instead, you just rubbed your face all over his sleeve, using his shirt to clean your face.

“So fucking petty,” Fred muttered, immediately followed by an “OW!” as you bit his shoulder hard in payback for his comment.

“Godric, you two are the same level of psycho,” Lee remarked. “Are you sure you’re dating?”

“Well, it’s the only way to keep her from killing me,” Fred muttered, rubbing his shoulder.

“That’s right,” you said proudly. “And don’t you forget it.”

Lee gave you an amused, if not impressed, look. “I thought you were just the upstanding prefect, until you started dating Fred. And then I just thought you tolerated him for some unknown reason. But you’ve got a streak of mischievousness, too. And pettiness.”

“I do not,” you said, brushing yourself off in a dignified manner and oblivious to the fact that Fred was slowly inserting twigs into your messy ponytail. “I’m simply handing out just deserts. If I seem mischievous or petty at all, it’s because it’s the only language that this numbskull - ” you jerked your head at Fred, and he quickly pulled his hand away “ – can understand.”

Lee thought this through, before pointing out, “But if you’re spending all of your time focused on giving Fred his just deserts, isn’t that you just chasing him around? Isn’t that just – dare I say it – an infatuation?”

Fred perked up, while your eyes turned into slits as you glared at Lee. “Yep,” Fred drawled, trying to hide how pleased he was at Lee’s comment. “Yep, yep, yep. That’s exactly what it is – an infatuation. She’s simply obsessed with me. Aren’t you, hellcat?”

You replied, in a short, tight voice, “The two of you are missing the point entirely. It is not infatuation by any means. It is simply justice. If you can’t see that - ”

“Yeah, yeah, let’s call a spade a spade, and get it over with.” Fred grinned as he slung his arm around your neck. “You love me, you want me, you can’t get enough of me.”

Rolling your eyes, you pushed Fred off of you. Fred chuckled at you as you walked away from him.

“Anyways, I wanted that top hat you were working on, Fred,” George interjected. “Going to make a copy of it for safekeeping. Don’t know what we might lose in the move.”

“Ah. Right.” Fred shot a quick look after you when George mentioned the word “move,” but you thankfully didn’t seem to hear George’s comment at all. Although, Fred thought wryly, that may be less because hellcat’s playing cool and more because she’s in yet another petty fight. The niffler had decided to latch onto your hair pin and you were having a hell of a time getting the niffler to let go.

“Stop it!” you said to the niffler. “Let go, now!”

“Grrr,” the niffler growled, refusing to unclamp its tiny claws from your sparkling hair pin.

“You grrr,” you replied angrily, sounding like a five-year-old.

As you tried to pry the niffler’s paws away, the niffler bit at your fingers. You called out, “Lee, a little help here?”

Lee chortled. “Nah, I think you’re handling it just fine on your own.”

“Her? Or the niffler?” Fred asked.

Lee shot Fred a wink.

Just then, the niffler managed to slide the hair pin out of your hair. He fell to the ground in a heap, but straightened himself out at once, and quickly shoving the pin into his pouch, he scampered away at once.

“Wha - ? You come back here!” you yelled. “Give that back!”

Lee clapped for the niffler, while George smirked at you. And, in a quiet voice that nonetheless was crystal clear to your ears, Fred murmured pleasantly, “Niffler – two, crocodile – zero.”

Fuming, you said, “Fine! Have it your way, then!”

You made to storm off, and Fred took that chance to turn to George and say, “Hey, while you’re down here, would you mind lighting these fireworks for us? I want to take her up the hill a ways, so she’ll have a clear view.”

George meant to sigh, but when he saw his brother’s expression, he instead put a hand on Fred’s shoulder and said, quietly and seriously, “Sure.”

Fred nodded his thanks and then he ran off to catch you – you, who were already stomping back towards the castle.

“Oi!” Fred called to you. “Wrong way, idiot!”

“What?” you shouted back, annoyed.

“The hill with the view is that way! You aren’t going to see anything from the castle!”

“See what? The three of you and the niffler making off with my family fortune? No, thank you!”

“No, all the fireworks that we made, you numbskull! We’re saving your family fortune for later!”

At this, you paused. “You’re going to set them all of the fireworks off, now?”

“Yeah!” Fred said impatiently, “Now are you coming to see them or not?”

You folded your arms and turned around to stare hard at Fred.

Fred tapped his foot impatiently at you. “What’s there to think about? Come down here!”

“I’m thinking about whether a fireworks show is worth my dignity,” you replied honestly.

Fred rolled his eyes. “‘Course it is! ‘Specially when it’s Weasley Wizard Wheezes’ fireworks show!”

You still thought it over. “How many did we make?”

“Seventy.”

You squinted at Fred, not trusting him. “Really?”

“No idea, but it was a lot.”

You sighed. “Fine! I’m coming. But I’m not coming for you, I’m coming to see the fireworks!”

“I know, I know, just hurry up!” Fred called. Then, he watched as you came towards him – first walking, then jogging, then sprinting full on, right towards him. He opened his arms and you sprinted right into him, knocking the breath right out of him, and he didn’t care one whit. Laughing, Fred took a moment to kiss you. Then, wiping the remaining soot tenderly from your cheek, he said, “C’mon, let’s hurry! George and Lee are waiting for us.”

You nodded. Fred took your hand and the both of you ran way, way up the hill, away from the castle, to get the best spot from which to see all of your fireworks – the pink pigs with wings, the nifflers with gold coins, the silver ones spelling out ‘POOP’, the violet ones spelling out ‘REPENT,’ the red canaries surrounded by sparkling hearts, the Cupid figures carrying little golden bows, and the huge crocodiles that opened their mouths wide and went snap! into an explosion of merry greens and golds – burst into the air in the most dazzling display of lights.

“I can’t believe how clear they are,” you said, in awe, trying hard not to blink as you didn’t want to miss even a second of this incredible display. “It’s broad daylight, but they’re all so clear! How?”

Fred reached over and pulled you into his side as he said, with a confident, happy smirk on his face, “That’s magic, baby.”

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Afterwards, as you were helping to clean up and pack things away back into the bag, Fred’s gaze briefly fell onto your hand again. Fortunately, the scars were now gone, but Fred still felt furious about it.

George swatted Fred on the shoulder with the top hat. “What are you thinking so hard about, huh?”

In a low voice, Fred told George about the scars on your hand. George’s mouth turned into a grim line.

“The last thing that I want to do is to push her,” Fred explained. “But Godric, it bothers me that someone did that to her and I can’t – I’m not doing anything about it.”

George sighed. “I know what those scars are.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, Ron and Hermione told me that Harry has scars just like that on the back of his hand. His said ‘I shall not tell lies.’ It’s what she does, apparently, to students who ‘break the rules.’”

Fred’s brow furrowed. “Who?”

“Umbridge.”

Fred’s eyes flashed.  

Lee, who had helped you get your hair pin back from the niffler, came right at the end to catch the tail of the conversation. “What, are we ganging up on Umbridge?”

“Yes,” Fred seethed. “We are. And not some tiny little prank, either. I’m going to kill her. I’m actually going to Avada Kedavra her right out of - ”

“Don’t Avada Kedavra her. I mean, c’mon, that’s not very original,” Lee said casually. “You can have much more fun than that. You’ve got the perfect opportunity to go all out on her if you want to, after all.”

“What d’you mean?”

“I mean, you two are out of here in two weeks, right?”

“Yeah. So?”

“So, let’s put our heads together and figure out how to destroy Umbridge on your last day, where you won’t have to face any consequences.”

Fred looked over at Lee. “But what if you get into trouble? You’ll still be here.”

Lee shrugged. “I can handle it. If you haven’t figured it out yet, you’re the weakest of all of us, Fred.” In his arms, the niffler squeaked in agreement.

Just then, your irritated voice broke into the conversation as you called, “Hey! How come you’ve got a map of the prefects’ hallway in your bag? And how come my and Percy’s rooms are marked with red ‘X’s? And how come you’ve marked the timing of our shifts? And – hey! Why is my room labeled ‘Satan’s Hellhole?’”

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

When you and Fred made it back up to your room, the two of you played rock-paper-scissors to decide who would get to shower first. Or at least, you pretended to indulge Fred in this little game. However, as soon as Fred stopped walking and put his hand out, you bolted for the shower.

“Oi!” Fred yelled, but you had already locked the door behind you.

“Why should I have to play for my shower?” you said loudly. Just then, you turned around and saw no less than six twigs sticking out of your hair. You let out an audible sigh.

“Something wrong?” Fred called innocently.

You ripped two of the twigs out of your hair before saying back, in as sweet a voice as possible, “No, honey.”

And Fred knew he was done for.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Sure enough, when you came out of the shower, all clean and blushy and soft-looking, you made a point to slip your towel off in front of him.  Crossing over to your dresser, you flung four or five panties over your shoulder and onto the bed, next to Fred, before you pretended to sigh and murmur, “Nothing cute enough. Oh, well, guess I’ll just go… bare.”

Before Fred could comprehend what was going on, you’d slipped up onto the bed, grasped his arm, and pressed yourself against him. Rubbing your thighs together slightly, you looked up at him and murmured, “Your turn.”

“I – uh – I think I’ll shower a bit later,” Fred said, gazing at you with nothing short of complete desire. His hand was already trailing up your thigh.

You frowned. “But you were so eager to take a shower. I showered quickly for you. I didn’t take my time as I usually do. I usually like to lather on a bit of a strawberry soap at the end to wash here - ” You gently touched your breasts and then let your hands float down your curves “ – and here. You know, just to have that soft…” You let your hands slide over your tummy and drift tantalizingly over your blushing thighs. “…touch… that you like so much.”  

“Yeah, uh, right, soft, uh - ” Fred was murmuring some absolute nonsense as he shifted closer to you.

You bit your lower lip, trying to hold back your laughter. “What, Fred?” you murmured.

“Um, I…” Fred slipped his hands on your hips and began to run his hands up and down. “Oh, Gods,” he moaned, feeling your pretty frame all over. He made to grab your hands, as they were resting on your thighs, but then, as smoothly as though you were made of water, you slid out of his hands and rolled neatly over on the bed.

Pulling the silk blanket up, you covered yourself. Resting on your stomach, you lifted your legs and crossed them, so that the silk sheet abruptly fell down your legs and onto the small of your back, revealing your hips, your ass, and your pussy. “Well, go on, take a shower,” you repeated, blinking softly at Fred.

With quite a hazy look on his face, Fred dumbly pushed himself up on his side on one elbow and he stared at you as you hummed, twirled your finger in your hair, and gently crossed your legs in the air.

Fred had to swallow, to combat his suddenly quite dry throat, before he croaked out what he thought was but a humble suggestion. “Before that, though, uh, maybe you’d like me to, you know, kiss you…”

“No,” you said at once. You sat up, and the front of the silk sheet fell too, catching for just a moment against your soft, perky nipples.

Fred moaned softly. But all you did was reach out with your foot and give Fred a gentle shove as you told him, “Get in that shower, Fred.”  

“But, baby - ”

“No ‘baby,’” you corrected him. “‘Baby’ is busy, Fred. She’s busy pulling twigs out of her hair.”

Fred suddenly popped up from the bed, and a scowl replaced his hazy look. “Is that what this is about?”

You shrugged. Then, you suddenly whispered, “Oops, I forgot about those…” and the next second, you got up from the bed, with your sheet still dangling around you, and you went around picking up the panties you’d thrown before. You quite intentionally spread your legs as you bent over the bed each time you had to reach down… Once, you made to reach down to grab your panties, but your hand kept going and you found yourself slipping your fingers over your pussy. Tightening your thighs around your hand, you lazily stroked your fingers against yourself and then, still bent over like that, you threw your head back softly and let out the prettiest little moan…

“Christ,” Fred growled.

Still bending over to show off the perfect heart shape of your hips and ass, you looked at Fred over your shoulder and whispered, “Go take a shower, Freddie. A long shower, and then, maybe by the time you come out, I’ll have forgotten about what an inconsiderate, pompous jerk you are and I may decide - ” reaching back, you gently spread your ass cheeks to show Fred your waiting pussy “- to let you have me. How does that sound?” 

Mind spinning, Fred hurriedly went to your bathroom. Grumbling, he closed the door and turned around, only to find that you had laid the twigs down in a perfect heart shape on the bathroom countertop and in the foggy mirror, you had written, “Weep and repent, Freddie boy.”

Scowling, Fred reached over and wiped the message off. He made to take off his clothes and hang them up, when he saw, already hung on the bathroom hooks, a pretty pair of your panties and a small tag on them, on which you had scrawled in eyeliner – Never for you.

Fred slammed his hand against the door and moaned loudly. He was so fucking hard for you, and it felt embarrassing, and worse of all, he now had to go into this stupid shower and go through the stupid process of washing up when you were just outside, prancing about all naked, with your stupidly perfect face and your stupidly angelic eyes and your stupidly charming voice and –

Fred suddenly yanked open the bathroom door and shouted, “Curse you, hellcat!” Then – slam! – the door shut and the shower turned on.

Outside of the shower, you fell over with laughter, clutching your sides and trying to keep your overflowing giggles to a minimum as you realized how perfectly your trap for Fred had worked. He’s so silly, you thought, wiping tears from your eyes. If he only had a shred of maturity of any sort, this wouldn’t affect him at all. Oh, Godric, he’s so foolish… and cute… You spread the silk bed sheet back onto the bed and then put the pillows back in place. You patted your pink pillow lovingly, knowing that Fred was going to sleep there tonight – if he doesn’t explode first, you thought happily.

You got dressed. Then, you quietly slid under your bed, meaning to give Fred a good scare. Only, when he came loping out of the shower, wrapped in a fluffy pink towel of yours, once he saw that you weren’t in the room, he ran over gleefully to your closet and hid inside.

You clapped your hand over your mouth to keep from making a noise, but you couldn’t help yourself – the giggles turned into wheezes and then into choked laughs and finally, Fred poked his head out of the closet and spotted you, waiting for him just as he had been waiting for you.

“You little rascal,” Fred said, coming out of your closet. He came over and pulled you out from under the bed. The two of you fell onto the bed, sitting up against the bedframe side-by-side.

You smiled up at him brightly and said softly, “Great minds think alike, huh?”

“Yeah,” he replied. But a second later, he added, “But no one ever talks about the flipside of that.”

“Which is?”

“That not-so-great minds must think alike, too. You know, since you’re not included in the ‘great minds,’ you’ve got to be on the other end, the idiot end, and they have to have a common factor amongst them too, by definition of them not being great.”

“Huh…” you said thoughtfully. “That’s a fair point.” You patted Fred’s cheek and murmured lovingly, “Some self-awareness at last.”

Fred rolled his eyes at you, and you smiled brightly back at him. “Fine, whatever, have your stupid little victory,” he mumbled.

In a soft voice, you murmured, “That’s all I ask.”

Fred slid down from the bed frame onto the bed so that while you were still sitting up, he was now lying down. Fred let his head slip onto your thigh.

You whispered, “You know I adore you, don’t you, Fred?”

Remember that, you thought. Please remember that once you’re at 93 Diagon Alley.  

“‘Course you do,” Fred said, yawning. “I’m brilliant.”

You smiled. Softly stroking his hair, you murmured, more to yourself, “I guess you can just think about pranks and pussy, after all…”

“Huh?” Fred mumbled out sleepily.

“Nothing. Sh… Go to sleep, baby,” you whispered. You lovingly touched his cheek, letting your warm fingers drift over his face…

Fred let out a soft, sleepy noise of content as he slowly fell asleep.

You quietly lifted your wand and Summoned your textbook. You read up on some chapters as you let Fred sleep on top of you.

But after a few hours, you realized that it was nearly time for your study date with Patricia.  

“Fred,” you said softly. “Let go of my leg.”

“Mm,” he mumbled, not opening his eyes.

You shook your leg a little.

“Sh…” Fred berated you, still holding onto you.

“Fred, I’ve got to get up.”

“Shush,” he murmured softly, “haven’t you ever seen someone trying to sleep?”

“But I have to go to my study session with Trish.”

Fred groaned. “Are you still on about studying, of all things? Merlin, do you never learn? It’s all rubbish.” While he spoke, you finally managed to pry Fred’s hands off of your thighs and you slipped away.

Fred sighed, but he let you go. Instead, he buried his face against your soft, pink pillow and as you left, he called out, “M’ gonna slobber all over this pillow while you’re gone!”

You laughed quietly as you shut the door behind you. Go ahead, Freddie, I consider that pillow yours, anyways. It’s your spot, on my bed, and I’d like you to be there always.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

“I’m so glad we aren’t fifth years,” Patricia commented, watching all of harried-looking fifth-year students poring over their books at the library. “O.W.Ls were the worst, weren’t they?”

You nodded in agreement, but you also looked at Patricia with an amused look. “You got eleven O.W.Ls, Trish.”

Patricia pulled a face. “Yeah, but they were hard to get. That’s what I’m saying.”

You smiled at her. “Come on,” you beckoned. “There’s an empty table over here.”

About an hour later, Kenneth and David joined you, and the four of you studied in quiet.

But then, a cocky voice floated out over your heads. “Ah, studying to be my apprentice?” A second later, a happy, freckly face popped up over your shoulder.

You shoved Fred’s face away at once. “Quiet, Weasley. I’m studying so that I can pass stricter regulations on your stupid products.”

Fred chuckled. “Do the Wizengamot know that your aspiration is to be a stone-cold dictator? ‘Cause last I checked, our form of government is a representative democracy.”

“Who cares?” you muttered shortly. “As long as there’s justice.”

A stunning silence followed your words, and David cleared his throat awkwardly.

Ah, shit, you realized abruptly, I forgot I wasn’t just with Fred.

Fred was smirking lightly at you, while David, Kenneth, and Patricia were all staring at you in earnest worry and disbelief.

“Er – a joke,” you said, cracking a pained smile at them. “I made a joke.”

“Oh,” Patricia said.

Fred grinned. “Actually, I wanted a word with you, hellcat. Got a minute to spare from staging your coup?”

You sighed and got up from the desk. “Fine.”

Fred walked away, towards the shelves in the back and you followed him. As you did, you realized that his shirt tail was sticking out. Just before he turned around, you reached out and grabbed it.

“Oi, what’re you doing?” Fred said.

“You should properly tuck in your shirt, Fred.”

Fred remarked cheekily, “But I like you holding onto me.”

You rolled your eyes at him as you tucked in the back of his shirt. “What did you want with me?”

Fred paused. The way you phrased it sounded so… “Well, that’s a long discussion,” Fred said, biting his lower lip.

You swatted him on the shoulder. “Don’t. We’re in a library.”

“What, I can’t have dirty thoughts in a library? What about when you hid under a table and sucked my cock for - ?”

“Shush,” you said, pressing your fingers against Fred’s mouth. “All right, I’ll rephrase. What did you come to tell me?”

Suddenly, the cheekiness disappeared from Fred’s demeanor. “Right,” he said softly, murmuring gently against your fingers. You let your hand drop away, only for Fred to reach down and grab it in his. He quietly ran his thumb along the back of your hand. You stood there silently, knowing that he was smoothing over the area where Umbridge had once etched those awful words on you.

“Fred, I’m all right,” you said gently.

“I know,” he replied. “I know you are.”

You reached up and brushed Fred’s hair back. “Are you all right?”

Fred took a moment before he nodded.

You gazed at him, realizing that it wasn’t quite true. You felt your heart slowly begin to sink… I always knew… But it doesn’t hurt any less. You leaned forward and rested your forehead against Fred’s chest, hiding your face from him.

Fred was silent, just holding you, and that was your biggest indication of what was to come.

“Fred,” you mumbled, with your eyes still closed.

“What?”

“Do you remember, when we were in the wardrobe and you were being a sleazy butthole and feigning your way out of a proper detention - ”

“It wasn’t a proper detention. You had some stupid chore planned for me.”

“ – you gave me a kiss that was kind-of soft, a teeny bit romantic, not at all like you… Remember that?”

Fred replied wryly, “Yeah, but if you were about to ask me to kiss you like that again, I think that last line ruined your chance.”

“Mm,” you said softly, with your eyes still closed. “Well, fortunately, I know just how to pick my chances back up.”

Fred scoffed, but then, you lifted your head and, getting up onto your tiptoes, you pressed yourself into him and kissed him. Grasping his tie, you gently pushed him backwards until Fred’s back thudded lightly against the nearest bookshelf.  You slid your hand onto Fred’s cheek and slipped your thumb into his mouth. He let out a soft breath and you paused for a moment, simply sharing that moment with him, before you pulled your hand away and kissed him again, softly yet quite tenderly.

“Ah,” you breathed out against his mouth. “Yes, I’ve wanted you like this. You’re mine, sweetheart. All mine…”

“I know,” Fred murmured back softly. “I know you love me.”

“Yes,” you agreed, barely whispering. Still, he heard you. You smiled a little, even though something in your heart was hurting rather badly. Don’t, you reminded yourself. Be strong. Be happy. Only good memories. Closing your eyes, you kissed Fred again, and you let your lips brush up against his softly for a moment before you turned your head and caught his lips in a deeper kiss. “Mm…”

Fred let you pin him against the shelf, but after a moment, he ran his hands lightly up and down your sides, admiring your shape and loving that he got to hold you. The two of you shared another lengthy, soft kiss that made both of you go slightly dizzy. If we go any further, I won’t be able to stop, you realized. I’ll become selfish, and I don’t want to do that. Settling back onto your feet, you murmured, “I’ve got to go back. Stage my coup.” In your head, you added, And you’ve got to stage yours, haven’t you, my love? You’ve got to figure out exactly how you’re going to leave me.

Fred fell back against the shelf again, catching his breath. For a moment, he wasn’t able to look at you. Staring up at the high windows of the library, through which the evening sunlight was coming through, he said, “Listen, tomorrow evening, around five o’clock, could you go to the Astronomy Tower?”

You looked at him curiously.

“Bring your anti-smoke towel with you and avoid Gregory the Smarmy’s corridor on the way up,” Fred instructed.

You hesitated. “Are you luring me into a trap, Fred Weasley? Out to catch yourself an alligator, are you?”

Fred smiled at you, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Then, suddenly, he grabbed your waist and he pulled you to him so strongly that he nearly swept you off your feet. You gasped softly as you tripped forward and and your hands flew to his chest as you caught yourself. Fred kissed you roughly, almost desperately. Holding you tightly, he whispered meanly against your mouth, “Silly. What do I need an alligator for, when I’ve got a mean old crocodile all to myself already?”

“Ah…” you moaned softly, as Fred bit gently on your lower lip before kissing you hard again. He touched you all over, with his hands flitting up your back and over your shoulders before he finally buried his hands in your hair and made you tilt your head upwards a little so that he could kiss you even more deeply. Your heart was pounding; you couldn’t breath when he was kissing you like this and holding you like this. Your entire body felt aflame and you suddenly forgot how to think. But there was no need for thought, as all there was was a tender, overwhelming warmth. You forgot where you ended and Fred began and you didn’t care to question it anymore – no, you didn’t even want to contemplate that there could be difference or distance between you. Never, you whispered fervently in your mind, as you let the fire of Fred’s kiss trail all the way down your spine to your very toes. I always want to be with you and be yours. Always.  

Finally, breathing quite heavily, Fred drew away from you and he set you down on your feet. You opened your eyes and stared up at him, wide-eyed. Your lip gloss was on Fred’s lips. You reached up, meaning to brush it away, but Fred shook his head. “It’s fine.”

“Oh…”

“Don’t be late tomorrow,” Fred murmured, and he gave you a kiss on the forehead before he walked away.

Tomorrow… Five o’clock… Astronomy Tower. You slowly made your way back to the table.

“What happened to you?” Patricia asked.

“Hm?” you murmured, as you sat down in your seat. “Oh, nothing.”

“But you’re blushing all over,” David pointed out, staring at you as though he’d never seen you before.

“Am I?” You pressed your hands to your cheeks, only to find that they were, in fact, quite warm. “Oh… I suppose I am.”

“You might want to - ”

“Hm?” You looked up at Patricia.

She pointed to your mouth. “Um, half your lip gloss is gone.”

“Oh.” You reached up and wiped your mouth. “Better?”

Patricia, David, and Kenneth traded looks, wondering if they should tell you that your hair was quite frizzy and that your shirt had been pulled out of the waistband of your skirt.

Finally, Kenneth cleared his throat and replied, “Yeah, all better.”

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Five o’clock. The Astronomy Tower. You held that promise in your mind for the rest of that day and all throughout the day the next day. You had never been so aware of time before, to the point that you found it difficult to focus on anything else. Tick, tick, tick.

Walking into Defense Against the Dark Arts at four o’clock, you noticed that Fred, George, and Lee were absent. You took your seat next to David. Tick, tick, tick.

“You all right?” he asked you. “You seem a little…”

You smiled at him. “I’m fine. Thanks, David.”

You kept your head down all throughout class, quietly jotting down notes as you usually would. Tick, tick, tick.

At four fifty, a loud BOOM! rang out in the corridors. Umbridge paused, looking up from her desk in alarm. Then, a series of pops and bangs went off and a few happy shrieks could be heard.

“What - ?” Umbridge began. At that moment, the door flew open and Filch hobbled in. He shouted loudly, “It’s them Weasley twins again, Professor!”

“Again? What have they done this time?” Umbridge cried, leaping to her feet and running to the door.

“Fireworks, ma’am - !” Filch began, but even as he spoke, a stray firework flew into the room and – BANG! Students shouted and dove under their desks, but you merely looked up and watched as a spray of orange and red sparks rudely spell out the letters “P O O” in the air.

“Get them!” Umbridge snarled. “This is the last straw!”  

“Yes, Professor!” Filch said.

Umbridge and Filch ran out into the hallway, followed by a mad dash by all of the students wanting to see what was going on. You remained calm and exited the classroom last. You stepped into the hallway just in time to see an enormous dragon, comprised entirely of green-and-gold sparks, clamp its glittering jaws directly on a screaming Umbridge. And you could see, a bit further down the hall, in Gregory the Smarmy’s corridor, that absolute pandemonium was reigning as shocking-pink Catherine wheels five feet in diameter whizzed lethally through the air, rockets with long tails of brilliant silver stars ricocheted off the walls, and large purple bats swooped ominously through the air, leaving behind streams of glittering black smoke behind them. You reached into your pocket and pulled out your enchanted handkerchief. Holding it to your nose and mouth, you quietly disappeared down the corridor and into the staircase. You looked behind you, and confirming that the staircase was empty and you weren’t being followed, you took off, sprinting as hard as you could all the way up to the Astronomy Tower.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

You hurriedly opened the door and ran straight out onto the open balcony. Sure enough, there was Fred. He was holding a broomstick in his hand. Behind him, you saw George waiting in the sky, hovering above the tower on his broomstick.

“Hi, hellcat,” Fred greeted you. "Punctual, as always."

“Hi,” you breathed out, stopping a few feet before him.  

George, seeing that you had arrived, took the opportunity to swoop down to the lower stories to chuck a few more fireworks in through the windows. Loud gasps and shrieks of laughter rang out as more fireworks exploded in the classrooms and hallways.

Fred tried to smile at you, but he couldn’t quite get himself there, and his expression was closer to a grimace.

Knowing that he was finding it difficult to find the right words to say, you decided to say it for him. “To 93 Diagon Alley, huh?”

Fred sighed heavily and dropped his head. “So you already knew.”

You gave him a small smile. When Fred looked up, he caught that soft, sad smile on your face and he also saw that soft, pink heart beating nervously in your chest, as it always was, only you wouldn’t let anyone see, anyone except him. And he knew that, he knew that so well, and so when he thought of having to live without you, he found that he couldn’t – he wouldn’t – “Come with me,” he blurted out.

Your eyes glistened as you whispered softly, “Oh, Fred…”

Fred dropped his broomstick, and it fell to the ground with a clatter. He crossed the few steps to you in a brief second and he grasped your hands in his. “Listen, I get it,” he said, looking at you with utmost earnestness. “The world needs people like you. The Wizengamot will be better off once you join, I know. You’ll protect and save people who sorely need protection. You will, I know it. Even your family – they need you to prove them wrong, to prove that the magical world is a legitimate world and that you have serious things to do here.” He squeezed your hands in his tightly as he continued, “But just because people expect you to be a certain way doesn’t mean you have to be that way. I mean, you’ve got a wicked sense of mischief, and it makes you happy to be silly. I know that about you. Only, you’re always hiding it, downplaying it, berating yourself for it, blaming yourself for it. But why? When it’s the part of you that makes you so spirited and charismatic and lively?”

You stood there, biting down hard on your lower lip and trying to stop your face from screwing up as you held back the sadness that was now bleeding out of every atom of your heart.

Fred’s voice was soft and honest, as he promised, “You could be great. No doubt about that. But if you – if you were to be with me, I would never judge you badly for choosing to be silly instead – in fact, I think I would kind-of love you for it. Because you would be happy, I think. And that’s what it comes down to. You don’t have to be great. You could be happy.”

You couldn’t feel the ground beneath your feet anymore. You felt strangely fragile and intensely vulnerable, like a single seed of a dandelion, about to be whisked away to an entirely different dimension by the slightest of winds. He saw so much of you. How? you wondered. How had Fred Weasley seen so much, when all of your close friends and family had not?

Almost as though he could read your mind, Fred murmured, “I’ve said too much, huh? But I mean it – you could be happy.”

Trying your utmost to hold it together, you replied, rather hoarsely, “I am happy, Fred. I’m with you.” You squeezed his hands back. “I think I lived a little bit because of you - ” Your voice gave out, and you felt a sudden sob escape you. You hurriedly held your breath, but it was too late.

Fred blinked, shocked. “Are you – Are you crying? Wha - ? Don’t cry.”

You laughed, even as your tears began to fall in earnest.

Fred rushed to hug you. “I said, don’t cry! Gods, what the hell am I supposed to do if you cry?”

Nestling against Fred, you wiped your eyes with your sleeves. Then, pressing your hands warmly against his chest, you looked up at him and said, calmly and warmly, “I’ll tell you what you’re supposed to do. You’re supposed to go out and light up the entire world. You’re supposed to fly off with your brother now and never look back. You’re supposed to live well and be happy, with or without me.”

Fred closed his eyes at your last words. So, she’s not coming with me. Of course not. She wouldn’t be my little hellcat if she did. He swallowed hard. “I wish I’d won that tic-tac-toe game.” Opening his eyes, he looked down at you and said fervently, “I would have made you come with me now. That would have been my wish.”

“I wish you’d won too,” you replied, smiling at him. But your smile faded and your hands slowly drifted down his chest and then fell away from him. Staring at his chest, at your favorite spot in the whole world, and wishing that he could feel in his heart how much you loved him, you told him, “Be good now, Fred. And mind you run a respectable joke shop. Who knows? If it’s respectable enough, maybe I’ll come visit it one day.”

Just then, George flew back up towards the tower. “Oi, Umbridge’s on her way up!”

Fred reached over and put his hand on your face and drew you in to kiss you one last time. At the same time, he slipped a piece of paper in your front pocket. He whispered in your ear, “That dragon firework eating Umbridge alive - that was for you, you know.”

You smiled. “I know.” You pressed your hands to his face, trying your very best to remember the shape of his handsome face against your hands. You gazed at him hard, etching this memory of him inside of your heart. For one moment, we can be each other’s. Just one more moment. Fred returned your gaze, and you both stood there, openly loving each other.

“Fred!” George called. “She’s nearly there! I can see her through the windows.”

And now it’s time to let go.

Fred's brow furrowed as you let your hands fall away. “Say you were trying to catch me," he told you. "Throw a few spells at me as I leave, so you won’t get into trouble with Umbridge again. Or else I really might have to come back and kill her.”

“Don’t worry about me,” you reassured him. “I know just what to do.”

Fred smiled, though his eyes were quite wet. “Atta girl.”

“Go,” you said.

You heard the door at the bottom of the tower burst open and Umbridge and Filch shouting loudly.

“Go!” you urged.

Fred pressed your hand to his mouth one more time before he dashed back to his broomstick. He had barely got on and kicked off into the sky when Umbridge and Filch burst onto the balcony.

“Professor!” you yelled. “There they are!” You pointed into the sky.

Seeing Fred and George on their broomsticks, Umbridge screamed, “You two get down from there at once!”

“You know what?” Fred said. “I don’t think we will.” He turned to his twin. “George, I think we’ve outgrown full-time education.”

George replied, “Yeah, I’ve been feeling that way myself. Time to test our talents in the real world, d’you reckon?”

Fred grinned. “Definitely.”

Furious, Umbridge raised her wand at the two of them – BOOM!  

A huge firework exploded on the ground, immediately letting off a huge plume of thick smoke. Umbridge and Filch coughed loudly and then blindly stumbled backwards. You cried out loudly, too, but in fact you had been the one to let off the firework, and you already had your enchanted handkerchief pressed over your face. When Fred had taught you to make fireworks, you had kept one of the last ones for yourself, sure it would come in handy sooner rather than later. As Umbridge had started to throw a spell at Fred and George, you had subtly thrown the firework onto the ground.  

Pretending to cough and struggle, you slipped off of the balcony first, and then, under coverage of the smoke, you hid behind the doorway. You waited for Umbridge and Filch to run out of the smoke and – whoosh! – you pulled a lever that you had installed yesterday evening by the doorway, and a huge net came down and swept up both Umbridge and Filch.

Umbridge screamed and Filch let out a wild cry. “What is this?” Umbridge yelled, thrashing in the net.

“Oh, Godric!” you yelled, pretending to be distraught. “Professor! Oh, no! Wait, I’ll go and get help!” You dashed out of the room and raced down the stairs.

You ran as fast as you had ever run, all the way down the staircases and down the long entrance hallway, until you came bursting out of front doors. Fred and George were still in the sky, hovering lower now as they announced their business loudly to the cheering students. Fred was yelling, “If anyone fancies buying a Portable Swamp or any of our fireworks, as demonstrated upstairs, come to number ninety-three, Diagon Alley — Weasleys’ Wizarding Wheezes! Our new premises!”

George added, “Special discounts to Hogwarts students who swear they’re going to use our products to get rid of Umbridge!”

Umbridge, who had managed to magick herself out of the net, shrieked from the top of the Astronomy Tower, “STOP THEM!” But it was too late. With a last salute, Fred said to Peeves, who was hovering in the air besides them, “Give her hell from us, Peeves.” And Peeves, who had never taken an order from a student before, saluted back.

Fred and George took off, then, swooping merrily in the air before flying straight off into the gorgeous spring sunset. A roar of cheers and applause rose from the students and even a few of the professors clapped as Fred and George began speeding away from the castle. They didn’t see you as you, on the grounds below, began to run with them. You ran as long as you could, deep into the Forbidden Forest, until you couldn’t see them through the trees anymore. You fell to your hands and knees, breathing hard. Your heart was beating so fast that it physically hurt, but that felt right to you. That felt… right…

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

It was Kenneth who came and found you. You were sitting calmly against a tree, gazing up at the night sky.

“Here you are.”

“Hi, Ken.”

“Are you all right?” he asked you.

“Of course. Never better.”

Kenneth offered you his hand, and you took it.

“How did you know I was here?” you wondered.

“I didn’t. I searched for you.”

“Oh.”

You both headed up to the castle together.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” Kenneth asked. “I didn’t really like Fred, but…”

You laughed lightly. “Of course I’m all right. What, you think I’d cry over a boy?”

The two of you entered the castle. Kenneth made to walk you to your room, but you said firmly, “No, I’d prefer to go up myself. Thanks, Ken. Really.”

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

You quietly closed your bedroom door behind you. Well, that’s that. It all played out exactly how I expected. So there’s no reason to mourn. I’m glad I made the most of my time with Fred. I have no regrets. So, I shouldn’t be sad. Right. Nothing to be sad about.

You stripped off your jacket when you felt a lump in your front pocket. Frowning, you reached in and pulled out a piece of parchment. Your eyes flashed when you recognized the title, written in your handwriting, which spelled out, ‘Petition to Fred Gideon Weasley, regarding the use of certain pet names.’ You saw that in addition to your requested nicknames of ‘Freddie’ and ‘Freddie boy’, Fred had scrawled on ‘Sir,’ ‘Your Highness,’ ‘Your Genius,’ ‘My Lord,’ and ‘Worshipped Entity.’ He’d signed it at the bottom, too, in his loopy, messy signature. And at the very end, next to his signature, he had scribbled, ‘Signed by your boyfriend, who loves his hellcat to hell and back because it’s the only proper way to love her.’

You burst out laughing, and you burst out sobbing at the same time. He really is so sweet. You hugged the paper to your chest as you thought to yourself, Fred, I tried to tell you at the end, but I don’t think you’ll ever know… how much I love you. And then, I never did really let you know, because I didn’t want to cause you any pain, how much I’ll miss you. God, I’ll miss you. I do, already. You slowly walked over to your wall and pinned the signed petition besides the drawing of a hellcat that Fred had done for you, and the page of notes that he’d turned into a paper airplane… Be happy, Fred. That’s the best world, really – not us together, but where you’re happy.

You remembered that you had once told Fred about your happiest dream. “It’s my favorite dream, to be honest. It makes me feel all warm for the entire day when I have it. You’re setting off a bunch of fireworks, and they’re all glittery pink hearts and they’re so brilliant and bright, exploding all over the sky. There’s a crowd of people clapping. I’m not among them, but I’m watching you, too. I’m so happy. I’m happier than I ever thought I could be. And so are you.”

You went over to your bed and sat down. Reaching out, you touched the pink pillow that Fred always slept on. Tracing the ruffles with your fingers, you let yourself admit one last time, Love you, Fred. Love you very, very much.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Three Years Later

“Look.” Patricia waved a flyer in front of your face. “Weasley Wizard Wheezes.”

You looked at the flyer, which had about a million different colors on it and screamed in bold orange font: “WHY ARE YOU WORRYING ABOUT YOU-KNOW-WHO? YOU SHOULD BE WORRYING ABOUT U-NO-POO! THE CONSTIPATION SENSATION THAT'S GRIPPING THE NATION!"

You bit back a laugh. The Wizengamot member next to you, Griselda Marchbanks, scoffed, “Could it be any more garish?”

“They’re making loads of money, though,” David murmured, while flipping through a stack of papers in preparation for the session on a new magical rights bill that you were all scheduled to debate and vote on today.

“Not just that,” Amelia Bones said. “We’re buying from them as well. They make excellent spell-repelling attire.”

“Well, that’s surprising,” Griselda murmured, “given that it’s a silly joke shop run by dunderheads who didn’t even graduate.”

Patricia looked at you. “Aren’t you curious?”

Kenneth, who had been sitting quietly and taking notes on what he wanted to say in today’s debate, looked up at you upon hearing Patricia’s question.

“Why would she be curious?” Griselda asked, glancing over at you. “You’re not into this sort-of thing, are you? Er – U-No-Poo?”

You smiled. “No, I’m not.” You turned to Patricia. “What I am curious about is why you’re comfortable talking to me about Weasleys’ Wizarding Wheezes, when I know you haven’t finished reading the proposed bill.”

Patricia quietly slunk away.

You grinned and you sat back down at your desk. But your gaze fell back onto the flyer that Patricia had left behind. You subtly slipped it into your stack of papers. Although, you didn’t need to look at it to know the store’s address, as it was still 93 Diagon Alley.

I once told Fred that I’d go see his shop once it became respectable, you remembered. Well, three years of being the highest-grossing joke shop and now the supplier of a ten-year government contractor – I think that’s respectable by any means. So it was that after the Wizengamot debate that afternoon, you quietly cleaned up your office and then Apparated to Diagon Alley.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

You stared up at the huge statue installed over the door of the shop. It was an animated statue of the Weasley twins, each wearing a black top hat. The top hat would lift up to reveal a cute bunny, then come back down, and then lift up again – only to reveal that the bunny was gone. You smiled. I remember that prototype.

You stepped into the shop, though with some difficulty, for the place was absolutely crammed – not just with products, but with customers. Wow. Congratulations, Fred Weasley.

A staff member, wearing a bright orange shirt, asked you cheerfully, “Can I help you find something?”

“No,” you said quietly. “I’m just… looking.” Even before you finished your sentence, you felt your eyes drawn up to the top of the staircase that was in the middle of the store.

There was Fred Weasley, looking stupidly jaunty and happy in his dragon-leather suit.

“Oh, Godric, crimson dragon skin? Fred, could you be any more unrefined?”

“You just wait, love. Once I have a bit of money to spend, I’m definitely gonna be worthy of the name ‘sir’. I’ll look so good, I’ll blow your socks off.”

You barely resisted the urge to shake your head at how ridiculous Fred looked. But it made you happy, really happy, to see him so clearly in his element. Yes, you thought warmly, I reckon I could call you a ‘Sir’ now. But you hardly need that kind-of affirmation anymore. You’ve done so well, Fred. So, so well. I’m so proud of you, and happy for you. Keep living well, my love. You turned around and began to leave.

However, you couldn’t help yourself, and just before you reached the door, you looked over your shoulder to catch one more glimpse of Fred. In that instant, Fred’s eyes met yours. The smile slid off of his face, and his eyes widened.

You smiled at him for the most fleeting of moments before you left the store, leaving Fred Weasley just as dazed and confused with your mere presence and in his own store, as you had once made him feel one late-spring afternoon in a secret passageway in Hogwarts a few years ago.

❧ The End

[yaboirezzy]

Any of you ever find a new thing you're interested in and you want to know and see more of it, only to find out that thing has been dead or gone for a while and the person/people behind it did something awful or got in some bad controversy?

Cause I have and it's with this:

So I was rewatching some old/classic web animations (mostly Eddsworld, SMB Z, and archived newgrounds animations) and I saw this in one of the playlist that has a bunch of those animations. I only watched it because it was next in the queue but after a couple of minutes I was kinda hooked on it and kept on watching, after a while I decided to watch it till the end, and well...I was really interested.

Sure it was REALLY dated with how it looks and feels, plus the characters and the concept or setting are really standard and could use some improvements, but I thought to myself while searching for more stuff about this series: "Eh, it's part of the charm with these old web animations. Also this was just the pilot episode so surely there's more to come, surely it'll get better from here, surely this'll be a good or at least fine series that'll have some charm and laughs with absolutely nothing bad happening to-" yeah that didn't happen and I wished it did instead of what actually happened.

Yeah so going over every unfortunate thing that happened would take like forever (I think based on what other people have said) so I'll just give you a short summary of what happened: The creator (animated james) canceled the series after two short seasons, he was exposed to have some questionable actions and/or interest which of course led to controversy, and he disappeared from the internet (wherever he is I hope he's doing well). Yup it's another "a classic content creator's downfall" situation...

Okay but you might be thinking to yourself: "What about the series itself and it's two short seasons? Is it any good, is it another case of separating the art from the artist, did it at least leave a bittersweet taste behind?" well....no. Yeah I'm very sorry to any C Students fans out there, I understand if you like this series and think it's really great or an underappreciated gem from the past, I get that and I respect it, but C Students is just really meh to me.

"Well what is C Students?" you might ask, well according to the wiki: C Students is animated web series centered upon a group of teenagers and their life and misadventures in Hartlane High School. Yup, that's all it is from the wiki, and it's actually fitting because that's is ALL this series is about, it's literally just another "teen high school - slice of life & comedy" series kinda like the ones you would find on Nickelodeon or Disney Channel back in the 2000s, except this time it's animated...which isn't really giving it much, like aside from the expressions, some of the movements, and a few things here and there you can have this series in live action instead and it would not be any different.

The characters don't improve or change even slightly from their basic one-note roles/stereotypes in the pilot, similarly the misadventures and situations they go on or find themselves in aren't that interesting or different compared to those from any other series in the genre, and the humor is...the same as those from any other series of this kind, not to say that it's all bad but it's definitely got a lot more misses than it does hits as the later episodes go on, hell even the mature jokes have all aged in varying conditions (both generally and based on the controversy). Speaking of which, that's kind of the overall problem I have with C Students: It clearly looks and feels like a comedic slice of life high school series, but it also tries to be serious and act like it has something important to tell, and it's obvious that it doesn't mix together or handled well. Like for example there's the music video "Creative Types" which is great to watch and listen on it's own, but when put alongside the actual episodes it feels out of place and doesn't feel like it's from the same series at all, which it is even if it's not canon to the main series' timeline. So TLDR: It peaked at the pilot and it slowly and sadly went downhill

However the thing that upsets me more than anything else about this series is...It could be good! It could've been better! I wish it could've been better! I wish it could've entertained us with something different or interesting to it's concept or genre in the same way as The Looney Tunes Show does to suburban sitcom, I wish it could've mixed/handled/balanced the more serious and mature stuff better like Smiling Friends, I wish it could've had some nice charm and laughs to it at least.

Which is why I'm planning on making my own take/version of C Students! Yes I know it's another one to add to my pile of "stuff I've planned out but never actually making", but that's the thing with me unfortunately: I'm good at planning or making ideas and not so much on actually making them come to life, I'm just one person and the idea of making a long running thing on your own without any help whatsoever is terrifying, I'm the one with the blueprints and I need other people to actually construct the thing. But anyways yeah, that was my personal thoughts on C Students (If you don't like or disagree with it then feel free to do so as it is MY opinion and you shouldn't feel obliged to agree with it) I'm PROBABLY gonna make my own take on this series sometime soon, hopefully we'll see how that turns out

EDIT: So I found out that the seasons I watched was a fan-continuation of the series not by the OG creator, but all my points still stand as it would've been more or less the same as canon (according to the creator and people in the comments)

[moony-2001]

Lore Olympus ep. 255 critique

Boy oh boy.

No remorse and tonal whiplash

We open this chapter with Persephone waking up not dead, total shock in Hades' arms, asking him if what happened was all a bad dream.

When Hades responds that what happened was not all in her head, we as the readers would expect Persephone to react with shock, remorse, something. Nope. Instead, we get this:

"Oh dear" with the most expressionless face ever. Our empathetic, caring protagonist everyone.

Now maybe I'm being too harsh. However, I feel like most people upon being confronted with the fact that they caused mass destruction would be pretty upset, if not incredibly so. But that's just my 2 cents.

We immediately transition into a party that's being set up for Persephone by all her friends and cohorts. We're then treated to this lovely image:

Thanks Captain Obvious.

While Hermes and Megaera argue over whether or not carrot cake is good, Thanatos pulls Hecate aside and notes about the massive uptick in incoming deaths which confirms what I said in my last critique post. While initially denying it, Hecate quickly realizes that something is very very wrong and that's when Hades and Persephone burst through the doors. Persephone bursts into tears and we get the most tone-deaf sentence ever:

Wow. Haha so funny. Comedy. Given the context of what just happened, this attempt at humor fell so flat.

I feel like the first third of this chapter kind of speaks for itself in terms of the writing and art, which is not good. There's just no emotion at all. I get the feeling that we're supposed to feel bad for Persephone and I just... don't. I don't have a whole lot more to say about this portion of the chapter; just that when I read it, I strained my eyeballs from rolling them so hard.

Hades tries not to make everything about himself challenge: Impossible

We transition into the post-party disaster cleanup where Persephone is hiding out in a greenhouse and Hades and Hecate are inside. Hades takes this opportunity to make everything about himself.

First of all, you're not and you're not.

But on a more serious note, this is not the first time we see Hades take a situation that has either nothing or almost nothing to do with him and make it all about himself. In fact, this is something he does frequently throughout the comic. Hades, in my opinion, very much has a "me, me, me, it's all about me" mindset.

One instance that comes to mind is this scene that happens in early s2 after Persephone opens up about her childhood and AOW. She barely has had time to share and process her traumatic experiences when Hades decides that this is the perfect time to dump 2000 years' worth of pent-up trauma onto a girl he's known for maybe 2 weeks at that point. Yet, he refuses to actively seek help during his time before meeting Persephone and even calls his therapist a hack.

Another instance is when Persephone confronts Hades about ripping out Alex's eye in s1 (when she was still somewhat empathetic to nymphs and whatnot).

Hades, when torturing Alex, very quickly shifts from the mentality of "you could've really damaged Persephone's reputation" to "I'm going to punish you because I view Persephone as my property and how dare you do this to me?"

Hades even outright admits it when confronted. He took a situation that had nothing to do with him and completely made it about himself.

Another instance is when Persephone tells Hades about what Apollo did to her and Hades flies off the handle and makes her trauma about himself. About what he is going to do even though that is not his decision to make.

It baffles me how conceited Hades is despite claiming to care about Persephone. I don't understand how you can look at a person who is going through a hell of a time and think "Let's make this about me". But that's a whole other post for the future

Zeus and Apollo

Skipping to the end of the episode, Apollo calls Hades (with Zeus' phone?) and tells him that he wants to take Persephone off Hades' hands.

Straight up, I don't like Hades and Persephone either as characters or together as a couple. I think they bring out the worst in each other. But Persephone is not some dog that needs to be rehomed and frankly, the whiplash Rachel is giving her audience in regards to Apollo's character is going to put me in a neck brace for life. She keeps flip-flopping between trying to make Apollo this sad, sympathetic anti-hero and the most egregious villain to walk the earth. You can not be both Zuko and Azula Rachel. You need to pick a lane and stay in it.

Apollo reveals that Zeus is in a coma and Hermes conveniently has the news up and running so we as the audience can be greeted with this:

"Attempted murder" you say? Of a being that literally can't die? Rachel, do you even know what attempted murder means?

"The defendant took at least one direct (but ineffective) step towards killing another person" and "The defendant intended to kill that person (malice aforethought)" -> California Law and Sentencing

While both of these are true in the fact that Apollo took the steps to kill Zeus and also intended to kill Zeus, they're gods. You can't murder a god. In order for murder to be attempted, or to even happen, the person in question has to be able to die. But then they're a human, not a god.

I feel like a more accurate report would be something along the lines of "Zeus has fallen victim to what seems to be a violent coup that has left him seriously incapacitated." Maybe that's not the best sentence to ever grace the writing scene, but hopefully my point is clear.

Also, how are people still oblivious to the fact that Apollo is, at the very least, incredibly suspicious right now. I mean his father has just been announced to be "dying" and instead of taking the time to mourn or even appear upset, he immediately slides into the position of power as King of the gods.

This chapter definitely wasn't as bad as 254, but it did make my brain hurt. Merry Christmas Eve and Happy Holidays to those of you who don't celebrate Christmas. See you all soon.

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Saturday lovely Fandom :) We’ve reached my favorite episode of the season. I explained in detail to that ask I received about my fav eps why I love it so much. Great follow up to the previous episode. So much good content in this one. Married moments galore, growth, all the goodies. The name on this one is apt. Makes me breakdown every time I watch it. Let's get going.

4x09 Breakdown

First off imma need more Lucy/Genny scenes in S6. Their banter and bonding makes me so happy. Idk what Tim was expecting with these two together again. Of course they were going to bond more and chat. Get off track while doing so. Genny trying to reminisce about the house. Asking Tim if he remembers their mom used to make them pose for pics by that window? Lucy jumps in because why wouldn’t she? Joining in saying her mom did the same thing. The smile on Genny's face. She clearly enjoys Lucy's company. Probably thinking why isn't Tim dating her?

Tim doesn’t look amused by this at all. Even huffing a little bit. They continue on like he isn’t there. Talking about wrist corsages they had to wear. Genny saying 'Why was that ever a thing?' Tim cuts off memory lane. Stating they’re just here to fix this place up and sell it. That’s it. Lucy therapy mode is activated by this comment of course. Stating they’re closing an important chapter in their lives. They need closure by doing things like this. Reminiscing and such.

Tim being so very over this turns on the saw. Trying to drown her out saying ‘What? LOL Such a little shit ha I love him so much though. (So does Lucy heh) Lucy screams 'You need closure!' again despite him trying to drown her out. He screams again 'What?! 'She is so flirty when calls him an idiot. Mixture of exasperated and flirty. Like he’s her idiot and I love it sfm. Also let’s note this is clearly Lucy’s day off. How is she spending it?

Renovating Tim’s childhood home and bonding with his sister some more. Not soulmate behavior at all… It’s crazy just like in S2 you forget he’s dating Rachel. It’s the same in S4 only their bond is even stronger now. Where is Ashley is all this? Not here... Their married vibes are insanely high in this moment.

Tim’s exasperated face when she calls him an idiot haha Epitome of Sunshine x Grumpy. All in front to Genny too. Like Grey I’m sure she also knew long before they did. If you needed a future depiction of their marriage this is it. Sister in-law and all in the mix. This is so domestic I cannot stand it.

As they continue to tear down the wall Lucy is telling them how much she wanted a sibling. She begged her parents for one. Instead they got her a turtle ha. Not really the same thing... Saying it was cute but a little smelly. Then Genny comes in with the hilarious sibling slam. 'Cute and smelly sums up Tim’s teenage years' LOL Saying she didn’t miss much at all. Tim returns the sass in full above. The cute family bonding getting me all in my feels. Lucy is so happy to be apart of this.

Written all over her face. Future sister-in law bonding as well it’s so great. Unfortunately while they’re tearing down the wall they find a gun. Tim goes from light-hearted and fun to serious at the drop of a hat. Genny asks how long that could’ve been in there? Tim isn’t sure. That it’s hard to say. He shows Lucy that the serial number has been filed off. Lucy says they need to run ballistics. Tim nods agreeing with her completely. They're so damn in-sync and just a well oiled machine with work stuff. Just comes together so seamlessly.

Genny panics a little. Says they don’t actually think it was used in a crime do they? Tim lets her know it’s THEIR job to find out. Not just him THEIR. I love it. Genny is upset they’re leaving. Wondering if anyone else can handle this? Tim promises they’ll be back as soon as they can. Genny scoffs and says she knew he’d find an excuse to leave. Tim tells her this is serious. They have to go.

Genny doesn’t fight him and tells him to just go. Lucy’s face when Tim exits the room. She’s torn between comforting Genny and rushing after Tim. Naturally she goes after Tim. He needs her more and is clearly so upset. She’s worried about him so he takes precedence. It’s like an instinctual pull to him in that gif above.

You can tell she wants to stay to help Genny but Tim needs her more. Before we delve any further. Let’s talk about seeing Tim in jeans during this. Phew lord. Tall drink of sexy in tight blue jeans. I am here for it. Break me off a piece. Those biceps in that t-shirt too. Trying to kill me good sir. This man can make the simplest outfits sexy af. How does he do it? It's not fair to be this attractive.

Once Lucy catches up to him she says Genny has a point. He could call someone else to handle this. That he still can. Tim gives her a good company line. Saying 'How a good Sergeant doesn’t create work for his officers. Even on his day off.' Lucy of course isn’t buying what he’s selling. Knows this man better than anyone else. Asks if 'It’s not at all about the emotions this house is stirring up?'

Tim not wanting to deal with his emotions says ‘It’s just a house…’ How you acted all of 4x08 would contradict that statement my love. *sigh* Oh my poor Tim. Lucy hit the nail on the head and he doesn’t want to face it let alone deal with it. Lucy doesn’t press him any further. She knows her boundaries with him. That doesn’t erase the massive worry on her face though. If she could hug him right now she would.

We rejoin them at that station. First off how can two people exude so much chemistry just walking next to each other? Tall/Smol gloriousness. The little to no space between them as they walk together. Personal space? Never heard of her. That word is foreign to them and it makes me giddy. How Tim is drawn to her as they move. Looking like he’s reading the file. When really he’s just magnetically drawn to her. He physically can’t help it at this point.

I can’t get over Tim being in street clothes in the station. Mmm. Not only that but being in jeans plus his badge showing? My god I’m a puddle. This man is my undoing and I welcome it. *Ahem* Their dialogue here is married af. It’s so god damn natural I cannot stand it. Lucy being on it with ballistics. Saying she got it already. Tim comments that was fast. Lucy stating above how she achieved said fast results.

Forever love that silent communication they do. He doesn’t even need to say thank you. That cute little smile does it for him in the second gif. It’s his thank you and she reads it loud and clear. Her buying cookies just to expedite this case? Tell me your ship is in love without telling me they’re in love. Gah this ep is doing things to me. It’s like when you see a cute puppy and are overcome with cute aggression. I’m overcome with amazing cute ship aggression LMAO

Lucy gives him the details she has from the report. Saying the ballistics match a 25 year old murder. Someone named Frank Ochoa. Tim freezes and says he lived down the street from them. He also mentions he was 14 when he was murdered. Lucy continues on and says the investigation resulted in a botched home invasion. Tim replies they can rule that out now that they found the gun in their wall.

Lucy asks Tim if he remembers anything from that night? Tim tells her he had football game. His mom took him and Genny. When they got back it was crawling with cops. That his dad hated Frank. Lucy tells him he had an alibi. Frank’s wife. This incites Tim’s anger even more. Saying he was having an affair with her. She was no alibi.

His mom didn’t know but he did. Ugh. Poor Tim having to live with that. To protect his mother’s feelings by living with it. You can see the hurt on his face. The anger welling up inside of him. So much so when Lucy tries to theorize with him he just says I don’t know. So overcome with emotions of his past. I wanna hug him this entire episode.

This next section we see protective/worried Lucy come out. Honestly she’s present most of this episode tbh. She finds Tim in the hallway headed towards interrogation. Asking what he’s doing? Tim lets her know Monica Ochoa is in interrogation. That he’s going to get to the bottom of this. Lucy stops him right away. Knowing he will go in there like a raging bull full of emotions. Tim shoots back she’s his father’s alibi.

She has the answer to whether it was her or his dad that killed Frank. He's so antsy to have answers. His anxiety coming off him in massive waves. Luckily Lucy is well versed in the ways of Tim Bradford. Knows exactly how to handle this. She agrees but says he can’t be the one to question her. That he will have an immediate bias towards her. Lucy does what she does best. Tells him what he needs to hear. Saying he can’t be the one to do this.

They need to do this the right way if they're gonna tackle this together. The best part is he agrees and hands the file over to her. No fight in him at all. My damn heart. I'm bursting. The immense amount of growth in this man. Seeing her reasoning right away, handing it over knowing she’s right and trusts her to interrogate Monica. The levels of growth for them and Tim as a person are off the charts. I adore him pointing to her then handing the file right over. Not giving it a second thought that she is right. Not only is he trusting her to do this correctly. It’s a family matter he’s letting her handle.

I cannot emphasize enough how huge this is. How far we’ve come from where we started. It’s moments like this where we truly get to reap the reward of all the build up. How Tim ‘I don’t talk about my personal life’ Bradford is handing over the most personal thing he could to Lucy. Saying you’re right, I trust you, let’s do this. To have this guarded man hand the reins over to Lucy is colossal. That wall of his with her is in damn near ruin at this point.

Tim watches from observation as Lucy handles questioning. Monica is defensive right off the bat. Dodging all of Lucy’s questions. Lucy gets her back on track though. Has her recite what happened that night. She says she was over with Tom (Tim's father) doing her taxes. He was a CPA so she went to him for help. When she got home their house has been broken into. Found Frank’s body in kitchen. Lucy tries to poke at the affair a bit more. Trying to get her to admit to it.

Asking if she was with the Bradford’s a lot? If so we're the kids there? Did Tom leave the house at any point while helping her? Monica gets even more defensive and gets up to leave. Lucy isn’t able to keep her in the room much longer. Suspicious af behavior. Tim can’t stand her up and leaving. He confronts her in the hallway. It goes about as well as you’d expect. If you think she was defensive with Lucy amplify that by ten with Tim.

When she takes off Tim says she’s covering for him. Lucy says maybe…but they can’t prove that. For first time he’s not looking at something with cop eyes. Thankfully he has Lucy who is. He’s so determined to see this the way he wants to. To nail his dad for something. If he does it’ll be cathartic for him. Almost likes forcing his father to atone for all his sins with this one crime.

Tim goes to see his father and it’s hard to watch. Tim has tears in his eyes from the moment he steps into that room. All his pent up emotions barreling out of him. He tries to keep himself in check and it gets the best of him. You can hear the hurt in his voice as he speaks to his father. I know that hurt well. His father joking the nurses love him. But not enough to give him a shot of patron. Tim is so irritated with him. Annoyed he always finds people to take care of his even when he doesn’t deserve it. Tom asks him if has something on his mind?

Tim brings up finding the gun, Frank Ochoa, his wife. His father denies knowing her cause he’s awful. Tim letting him know he knew about the affair. He tries to deny it further and Tim lets him know he caught them when he was 13. His father finally giving in with an 'Oh crap.' Then Tim says something that breaks my heart. ‘For some reason I still don’t understand. I lied for you. Lied to mom.’ You can see how that ate at him to do so. He was too young for such a burden.

I think the reason he doesn't understand is he wanted his dad to be proud of him. It sounds messed up but I get it. Wanted him to praise him for something. Anything. Give him an 'Atta Boy.' I so understand that. You’d think the relationship I have my own parents their opinion would mean nothing. Now it does less so than it used to. But there’s still something deep down inside me wants them to be proud of me. Praise me. Say I did a good job. Instead of being disappointed.

It’s some crazy DNA thing with your parents. Where even if you’re on bad terms there is still part of you that wants that acceptance. When really it should be the other way around. Tim wanted his dad to recognize what he had done for him. Even now he wanted that and all he got was emotional abuse as his reply. Belittling him and calling him ‘Poor little Tim-Tim’ I bet you Tim was a very emotional sensitive child like me and he was shut down constantly like I was. Hence that nickname. Ugh. I hate his father so much. Tim asks why he did it? Ruining one family wasn’t enough for him?

His father gets out of bed. Tim tells him to get back in. His father being defiant knowing Tim won’t lay a hand. Says ‘Make me.’ Tim can’t even look him in the eye and his father tacks on ‘That’s what I thought.’ This hurts my soul watch. Feels like a glimpse into how things were for him growing up. Anytime Tim stood up for himself or Genny. This was probably the reaction he got. Him goading him into a reaction. Then when he didn’t get it belittling Tim was the next step for not doing so. *sigh* Seeing the emotional abuse in action is hard to swallow. I hate seeing Tim shrink like he does in his father's presence.

That strong confident man we’re all used to reduced in an instant due to his father. Breaks my damn heart. His father confesses to killing Frank. Goes after Tim some more and says screw him. Calling Tim mockingly a ‘big man’ for dragging him away from his death bed. Tim tells him ' This isn't over..' tears threatening to spill from his beautiful eyes. I wanna hug him so much. His father tells him to get the hell out. *heart clutch* When a parent cuts you down like that and you’re too stunned to really reply. It's a helpless feeling. The rage I feel is a culmination for him and what I’ve dealt with myself.

We return to Tim at the station. Ready to write his father up. Man on a mission really. Lucy comes over to talk to him. Tim word vomits all over her. Coming out faster than Lucy can get a word in. Asking her a favor and getting the DA contacted for him. Lucy finally is able to tell him to stop. Let’s him know she brought Monica back in while he was away. Tim is confused and asks why?

One of the two things I adore about this scene is Lucy’s initiative here. She knew from very jump how emotionally compromised he was. He only saw one narrative and ran with it. Blinding him to any other possibilities this case had. Lucy was the one with cop eyes for him. Brought Monica back in knowing she could get more out of her solo.

The second thing I love is once again is the personal growth from Tim. He doesn’t question her doing this. Isn't mad about it. Hears her logic and her telling him like it is like she does best. Letting him know his judgement was clouded. That Tim couldn't see past the version he wanted. Tim doesn’t disagree. At all. She took charge of this case and he’s not upset in the least. Just curious and asks her what she’s found? I’m just so proud of him. It’s not easy to work on yourself and he has so very much. It shows so much in moments like this.

We cut to Tim back at his dad’s room. There is a finality in the air as he walks in. Gives his dad that shot of patron he has been wanting. Like Tim is giving him little something to gain passage into talking him. To say how he’s really feeling. Calls his dad out on what really happened. What he learned from Lucy. Frank was beating Monica. She lost it one night and killed him. Ran to Tom cause she was terrified. He helped her stage the house.

His father goes off saying she deserves a medal for what she did. That he was an abusive brutal bastard. This where Eric should win all the awards. He is so masterful in his inflections, The emotion in his voice, The tears in his eyes, His facial expressions, Everything. How he calls his father out for being the exact same thing. His reaction is the same as my mother is anytime I bring up something from our childhood. Defensive saying they’re nothing like what you’re bringing up.

Being defensive because they know it’s true. Or so deluded they truly think they did no wrong. Not sure which one is worse tbh. Tom trying to take credit for who Tim became. That he turned him into a man. His reply is so so good. The deep emotion’s in his voice as he tells him off. Saying he became who he was despite him. Yeah you did babe. As did I with my parents. His final words an amazing slap to his father's face. ‘Goodbye dad. I hope it hurts.' I hope it does too.

I would like to say first I adore her coming to hospice with him. Knowing he would need it after confronting his father. Knowing him so well. He would never ask for her support directly. Lucy recognizing this and coming for this reason. He needed her and she knew it. She watches him emerge from his father’s room so distraught. Immediately asking if he’s ok? Lucy looks like she wants to cry the minute she see's him. He looks so broken and sad. Melissa and Eric are just incredible in this scene. That look of intense worry on her face. my heart.

Tim telling her right away he sure as hell isn’t. Divulging his feelings and showing how deeply hurt he is. That his father protected Monica. The way his voice breaks as he tells Lucy this. How his father never did anything to protect him and Genny. All he ever did was tear them down. Physically hurt Tim on top of emotionally damaging him for life. The pre-tears in his eyes when he says but he didn’t think twice for his mistress. Broke half a dozen laws for her...

His reply a mixture of incredible anger and deep hurt. Lucy updates him saying Monica is being processed now. That they probably won’t go after his father. Since he’s on his death bed. Tim is so drained and resigned at this point. Says 'It doesn’t matter. He will get judged soon enough..' The worry is still coming off Lucy in waves. She knows he’s holding something else back. Something that is still hurting him. She is just waiting for him to share it.

Lucy is pleading him with her eyes above to share it. It comes shortly after this. The line that circles us back to the one Lucy said toward the end of 4x08. The 'Tim Test' line she let slip. One that has been eating at him ever since. A thought that no doubt was destroying his mental health further. Adding to his overall anxiety about the connection between him and his father. Worried Lucy viewed him the same way as his father. That she associated his tests with training to the abuse his father put him through. It’s heartbreaking to watch Tim say this to her. Almost begging Lucy to relieve him of his hurt. His deep seated anxiety about this.

To alleviate him of the bottomless worry that she’s made an association between how he was abused and she was trained. NEEDING her to let him know they’re not the same. Because if they are it’ll destroy him. To think he hurt one of his favorite people because he was just like his father. It's not a thought he can handle. The fear in his eyes thinking he had done to her what his father had done to him is breaking him. Tim is unraveling at this point.

It’s the way his body language is defense and guarded as he speaks his lines above. Like he’s bracing for impact. Waiting for her to give into his deepest fears. He’s expecting the absolute worst due to his damaged past. Lucy with all the empathy in the world splayed across her face says ‘I know. You’re nothing like him…I...’ Too stunned to finish her sentence. She's hurting right along with him. Because she is seeing the load he's been carrying and wanting to relieve him of it so badly. She truly believe's he isn't like him. Needs him to know this.

I mean back in 1x04 when she defended Tim to Nolan. When she was at the height of her tests. She said he was 'Calculating not cruel.' Lucy not once believed that of him. Always saw his good heart from day one. You can see Tim take a step back from her in the first gif. His body innately trying to protect himself. He looks so broken I wanna cry. He so desperately wants her to assuage him of his fears.

Yet when she does he can’t believe the grace she is extending to him in this moment. The way he steps back instinctively. Like he isn’t sure he can trust this. That last bit of his wall holding him back in this moment. His gut instinct to retreat from having any emotions. Especially this openly with someone. Lucy can’t stand him pushing away when he’s hurting this badly. Doesn’t waste anymore time and encases him in her arms.

Rushing to not only reassure him but to comfort Tim on a physical level. Giving him the solace he didn’t even know he needed. She does this because if she doesn't she'll start crying herself. She has never seen him this vulnerable. This open and its making her emotional too. Lucy is wanting to absorb his pain, his fears and most of all put him back together. She does so with this beautiful embrace. His beautiful sunshine human wrapping him up in her arms is just what he needed. Pushing away his dark clouds with this hug. He is stiff at first with the initial contact then gives in fully below.

Hands down my favorite hug of all time because of the emotions that go with it. She then reassures him once again. 'You're nothing like him.' We watch Tim melt into her arms fully giving into the comfort she is providing. That wall she’s been chipping at since S1. That’s gone now. Utter rubble after this moment. Lucy validating him is everything his soul truly needed. His person confirming he was a good man. Tim’s body finally surrendering and sinking into her embrace once she spoke those words again. Reaffirming it for him.

Her opinion mattering the most. This moment screaming that in every way. Hearing this from her was EVERYTHING to him. Absolutely everything. I remember when I first watched this moment I was in awe of it. How perfectly he fit into the crook of her neck. Once again they fit together like a perfect puzzle piece. I also knew we were headed towards our endgame. This was our pre-getting together season. The emotional depth out of this episode alone I felt it. The hug solidified that gut feeling.

One of the many reasons why this is my favorite episode of the season. These are the moments I love so much because they’re developing emotionally, as characters and their relationship as a whole. It’s why they work so well in S5 when it finally happens. The bond, the growth, the things they went through together before they got together. It’s what created this amazing base they’re standing on now in s5 and what we will get in s6. I love their journey so much. Wouldn’t trade a single thing in this slow burn. Not one.

Tim shows back up at the house. Looks like Genny has done a lot do work solo. You see the guilt splayed all over his face. He apologizes for not helping out more. Genny tells him she’s used to cleaning up messes by herself…Tim apologizes again for that and says he knows she is. He wants to be a better big brother. Genny compliments him says he’s not that bad. When he’s around....

Tim tells her that’s all gonna change. He’s going to visit for every holiday and call twice a week, and he’ll handle fixing and selling this house. That she should get home to her family. Genny replies sweetly and says he’s her family too. I do love their scenes a lot. I need more of this in s6.

She has them make a deal. That they’ll do this together and be done with it. All of it. I love this so much. There is a lot I don’t love about my childhood. But the one thing I’m eternally grateful for is the relationship with my baby sister. You can’t beat that bond. I am so happy for Tim to have it. Her asking about the gun was too funny LOL I imagine he would tell her even if it’s awkward af.

Side Notes-Non Chenford

Gonna be honest didn’t care about anything else in this ep. Other than Tamara owning Smitty’s ass repeatedly in this ep haha

Thank you forever and always to those who like, comment and reblog these reviews. Makes my heart happy. Shall see you all Monday with 4x10 :)

[dalesramblingsblog]

Yeaaah I know I'm not the first person to say this, but Wrongs Darker Than Death or Night really doesn't land its central themes too gracefully. I can understand, in the abstract, why Kira might react to the knowledge of what happened to her mother the way she did, given how strongly and unrepentantly she holds to her identity as a terrorist resisting Cardassian oppression, but in spite of Sisko's dissenting opinion in the final scene, the conclusion to the episode doesn't really manage to adequately capture the disproportionate and misogynistic response faced by women in the sort of situation faced by Kira Meru.

(Ironically, despite my generally finding Voyager to be an uncomfortably conservative show in terms of its politics, even The Killing Game's fleeting acknowledgments of the hostility shown towards Brigitte end up feeling more substantial than anything in Wrongs, and that episode is only really trying to be a fast-paced holographic blockbuster rather than a weighty and serious representation of the sexual coercion endured by comfort women. It's still not exactly groundbreaking stuff but it's... there, at least.)

I think, to state the obvious, this is partially influenced by the unanimous maleness of the DS9 writers' room, though it's also worth noting that perhaps Voyager's second most prominent female writer, Lisa Klink, was credited on episodes like Favourite Son and Retrospect during the only period of Berman Era Trek to be overseen by a female showrunner. So while DS9 definitely should have hired more women (God they really let Jane Espenson slip through the cracks), I think it's also fair to say that there existed pretty substantial and deeply-rooted failings in Star Trek's handling of sex and gender that also contributed.

(And to be clear, the lack of female writers is a part of those failures as well.)

[phantomoftheorpheum]

PLL: OS (Summer School) Finale Live Notes.

*Spoilers for the entirety of PLL Summer School

Okay friends, we've come to end of the season! I took notes throughout the episode, so here they are, plus some post-episode thoughts.

I knew Kelly wouldn't be dead! Faran had no reason to arrive so quickly if she wasn't going to be able to save her.

Okay, not important, but Kelly's hair always looks so good when they let it be wavy, I hope she'll get that style more in season 3 (assuming there is one), which would also set her apart from Karen.

Y'all, istg if the Ravenswood namedrop means they're taking an actual supernatural angle with this, I will be the one rioting.

"They just kinda showed up outta nowhere. I mean, doesn't that Christian guy make horror masks?" hkhjsdhfjk Heartbreaking: The Worst Person You Know Just Made A Great Point. Jk, jk, I promise I do not actually hate Jen or think she's the worst person in the show, I just really hate the love triangle trope and the way this storyline has been handled and this made me laugh, and while this feels like a big deflection, yet again (like... as did you?), she seriously does have a point, someone SHOULD be bringing up the masks.

I actually love the bickering when people start accusing each other’s SOs. I do like that the girls are supportive of each other, but they need conflict, too. Also interesting to see what comes out when people are getting defensive. 

Aaaaand there's another Scream reference. Tabby: Safety in numbers! but then Tabby, approximately 2 seconds later: Let's go individually investigate our suspicious love interests and then regroup! TABBY YOU ARE A HORROR NERD, YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER!

If Johnny is not involved, he really is the CHILLEST dude on the planet.

Confirmation that the Bloody Rose murders were filmed! That's so validating. At this point in the episode, I'm leaning towards Wes and not Christian in this aspect. They're (the girls) too worried about Johnny and Christian, which wouldn't make either of them a major twist, and they have been literally 0% worried about Wes (which I still maintain makes absolutely no sense, considering what Tabby and Christian found at his place. & the main reason he ever dropped ever so slightly on my suspect list [he was still very, very up there] was how ridiculously HUGE of a red flag that should have been that it felt like it could be a set up, but then Tabby didn't get suspicious [which was also my biggest red flag with Christian, but now she is suspicious of him] so...)

I thought it would be a stabbing and not her smashing him on the head (I also thought it might be a nightmare), but I WAS right about my “rule of threes” and my prediction that Johnny was going to fail to talk down Imogen, after successfully doing so twice before.

I'm not convinced he's actually an antagonist because if he were, why the fuck would he hide bodies at the place he works, like that is a ridiculously bad move, but also if this kills him & he’s not bad, that’s gonna be so fucked & also Imogen could definitely go to jail. So. Idk what to believe yet. 

Y’ALL, I swear to god these are my as I am watching notes & I absolutely did not realize how hilarious me calling Johnny “the CHILLEST dude on the planet,” was going to end up being. I know this scene is serious, but I just lost it, knowing how it related to my notes.

Okay, on a more serious note. Survivability is not looking great for Johnny. Also, Imogen, word of advice- when you find bodies in the freezer, LEAVE and call the police, don’t go confront the guy you believe murdered them!!! 

Okay, pause. Tabby just fell down the stairs at Christian’s (knew that was coming, obviously) after finding a Davie mask (not surprised), but since we have half an hour left in the episode, I’m guessing this means that the frame job I thought was happening IS happening and it’s happening to Christian (Wes hired Christian specifically to frame him?) and Johnny, meaning Wes is likely the mastermind. Also, this makes me VERY suspicious of Jen. She pushed the girls towards Johnny and Christian and now there’s the perfect evidence to turn Imogen and Tabby against them?

Right. So I did not have on my bingo card that Rose Waters would actually get her face carved off, that was honestly more brutal than I was expecting. 

The body on the altar is Pastor Malachi, which I’m a little disappointed about (in myself), but I did say he was the only one of the other victims that I could make any argument for being there, but I really thought it was going to be somebody important to Rose.

Okay, WELL, yes on Mrs. Langsberry and yes on Wes, but I did NOT expect him to take that mask off during the livestream. I really thought he was going to try to pin everything on someone else. I also don’t believe for a second he intends to let Tabby live, no matter what she says (though I do believe he would let her “seem” to live for the sake of the film, then kill her after). 

Did Christian not just say they should go to the screening room because there are no doors? But then immediately direct them out of some exit doors? I think this is just silly writing & not actually nefarious, but rofl.

“Mickey is a sick fuck who wants to get caught!" It really is Scream 2! It really is! Except Tabby didn't have a "wavering because I'm not sure if I can trust my boyfriend and maybe I shouldn't untie him," equivalent moment, really.

I know they all did self defense, but that last guy Tabby took out looked like a video game takedown, lol. I would have probably believed it more with Faran, but I get it.

Well, at least Faran got to punch Bloody Rose.

I AM SO MAD AT MYSELF. Tabby and Christian have that whole convo about their favorite horror movie deaths and she brings up the pitchfork, and at the time I even thought, “I wonder if someone is gonna get stabbed with a pitchfork,” and then I chose not to bother to type that up and I cannot believe I did not type that up! Of all the useless crap I typed up and that's the thing I didn't bother to ever post about? I'm disappointed in myself.

Y’all, maybe one of you should stay with Tabby, like maybe you don’t need 4 of you to go into the cabin to check the Wes situation. 

I do love the “they always come back” Scream reference with Wes’s death here.

Okay, but... why did he kidnap Dr. Sullivan? And why was Pastor Malachi on the altar? And we're not gonna talk about the tests? Like I get they were for the movie, but we're just not even gonna mention them? Because if Wes is using that footage for his film, then isn't it kind of a problem that they all survived because that very much does not make Tabby the typical sole final girl.

Uuuuummmm…. Like assuming we’ve had all the important reveals and not considering what they might write next season, Imogen really fucked up the Johnny situation, turns out that really was the chillest dude on the planet.

Whoa. Wait. After all that, we’re just getting it thrown at us that Dr. Sullivan is actually a total asshole?? It's wild that she was actually risking her license just to write a book and she hates all of them.

I mean, Archie not actually being dead is the least surprising thing ever. Obviously he was not actually dead.

So.... are the girls wearing the girls masks supposed to be the movie Tabby is imagining? Or are we actually supposed to be concerned about this?

Wow, okay, lots to digest.

Immediate Post-Finale Thoughts

I'm so tired and I stayed up super late to watch this, so I will probably do a "now I've had some time to think about it," post finale post later, but this will have to do for now.

Overall, I thought this was a fun finale! Personally I like this reveal much better than the Principal Clanton one.

However, there are so many loose threads, unresolved storylines, and randomly missing characters, so I'm gonna go over a few of those.

Ash just basically stopped existing. They say his name a couple of times, but him just not being in the finale at all felt weird.

Same goes for Greg, who I normally wouldn't miss, except they had all the Faran/Greg stuff last episode. I'm not sure why they cut most of that, but then left what they did in 2x07. It feels like maybe they felt they had to keep some of it because they wanted to show Faran missing Kelly's phone call, but they couldn't explain why Faran and Greg were out together if they didn't have their hookup earlier in the episode, but... I think it would have been cleaner to just cut all of that and just show Faran seeing the missed call without any explanation of why she missed it. I don't know. I think this was a pretty messy way to handle it.

-longest sigh in the world- you're telling me that the Shawn/Noa/Jen love triangle literally had absolutely nothing to do with anything and we spent that much time on it????? This kills me. I gave the writers too much of the benefit of the doubt on this one. I really, really thought they wouldn't do all of that and literally not have any of it matter. Is this really what they wrote? This isn't the edit? Blegh. This was such a waste of time of a plot point. Why did they bother to have Shawn in this plot line at all? You're telling me not only did I sit through 2 of my least favorite tropes (love triangle and infidelity) and you could have just written Shawn out between seasons and had the conflict be that Noa is enamored with Jen, but one (or more) of the girls don't trust her because she showed up out of nowhere (like she accuses Christian and Johnny of doing) and keeps lying about things? But instead they did this? And for what? So Noa can call someone to hot wire a car? Because we didn't even get any drama out of it (aside from Noa smashing Shawn's car and the little bit of bickering in this episode) because the girls were immediately supportive and Shawn's reaction was relegated to some angry weightlifting. What the fuck? This was a huge miss, imo.

So... It seems like a lot of Imogen's stuff was only there to set up her attacking Johnny. Like the whole babysitting Estelle sequence never comes back around (but this is the first time Johnny sees her panicking with a knife), and the stuff with her dad and Rebecca didn't matter, except for the fact that Johnny also talks her down when she has a knife. Hm.

So? How long were those bodies in the freezer and what was the point of putting them there if Wes wanted to get caught anyway? Because surely Johnny would notice if they'd been there a long time, but also they weren't trying to frame him (poor dude got hit on the head with a wrench by his girlfriend and then locked in a freezer with 3 dead bodies), so?

I wish we'd gotten a little more explanation of Wes's plan. I still don't really get why he kidnapped Dr. Sullivan and tied her up in the shack. Where was that going?

Am I just super sleep deprived, or did all this just not have any connection to the Waters family lore, aside from Wes killing Rose (I think she's dead) and appropriating the Waters family story for the film? Also, how does his reveal work, since he's just suddenly not in character? Like what the hell is Wes's film?

Who/what did the snake in Imogen's poster represent? WAS it Dr. Sullivan and Wes knew about the book? I can't think of why it would be there, otherwise. This stuff feels quite messy to me.

I have a hard time believing Mrs. Beasley is just not going to be an abusive piece of crap any longer, but it's nice to see Kelly with the other girls.

How did SpookySpaghetti get all the girl's new phone numbers? That was not made clear.

Do we think there was someone else we know who was involved (I mean that they've actually planned for, not that they will retcon in later) that didn't get caught?

So the three figures in the poster are Wes as Archie, Mrs. Langsberry as Rose, and Chip? as the skeleton? I assume?

I do feel pleased that I called the combo of "someone making a movie and a mother avenging her dead child," but I'm a little disappointed a love interest didn't get revealed as evil, and also I thought the "mother" would be a bit more unhinged than Mrs. Langsberry ended up being. Like obviously she is committing a bunch of murders at Wes' direction, so not a shining example of rational thinking, and she's in denial about Chip, but I thought the "mother" was going to be fully delusional, tbh.

Am I still a little sad that they didn't find a way to shoehorn in a musical moment for Antonio? Yeah, a little, but he's alive so there's always possibly next season. (To be clear, I do not want them to do a musical episode, like please no, I just was hoping they do karaoke at some point this season or something, though I had no expectation of that fitting into the finale).

Season 3 renewal announcement soon?

Okay, I'm sure there's more, but I'm super exhausted and I need time to mentally digest this.

As usual, if you have any thoughts/feelings you want to share, feel free to shoot me an ask!

[ineffableigh]

Timeline of Suspicious Events Brain Dump - PART 3

You know the drill at this point. Off we goooo! [Part 1][Part 2]

"Maggie and Nina are depending on me!" Azi's really drunk his own Kool-aid at this point, or he's putting on a complicated show to pretend this is a serious endeavor. Giving away a valuable book just to trick Heaven? Something's really not adding up.

Another weird noise for the logs: A bassy 'whoosh/boom' noise right after Mutt says he has anniversary dinner with his beloved spouse and the camera pans to Crowley. Not sure it means anything, but it did stand out to me lol.

Something that stands out to me a lot as well, assuming it was done deliberately (I don't know the actor) - Mutt seems to be having an awfully hard time handling the cards he's currently sorting. Like, after he says 'no' at first, I cannot figure out what he's trying to do with his right hand.

Also of note: The mysterious Bird Box is nowhere to be seen in the shop, even though MANY of the set items are identical to the 1941 scene. Where that bird at??

"Under no circumstances can I there be for tonight." ... what? This has to be on purpose, right? I'm digging, I know, but that's what we do here lol.

Big sad empty warehouse for the Demon Legions. Why on earth (or in Hell) is Hell so short staffed? Where them demons at?

DANGER...osity!

"I can only be there 'til 7" so that's a half hour window for the meeting, at least for Justine. Fair, she can only handle so much of Azi's painful French lol.

The metal barrier just outside the cafe is... awfully snake-y isn't it?

"Looking where the furniture isn't..." is definitely going to be VERY important. Crowley absolutely knows something about losing AND regaining memories and it's been telegraphed all season.

Michael has eye earrings! This feels like a huge tie-in with Maggie's all seeing eye necklace.

Skimming through the rest since I've gone through it multiple times through other posts, but quick takeaways include...

Ms Cheng looking at the Pub before she goes in. Suspicious given we know that's the Hellevator, but have no reason to believe she'd be looking for someone else coming from that direction as the cafe AND record store are the other way.

Mr Brown has to be suspicious because we HEAR him getting mulched by demons when he's taken, but he survives? WEIRD.

Maggie's main character moment as I mentioned in my 'Thoughts about Maggie' post.

Azi seems very genuine when explaining the Coffee Shop Love Plot to Nina, so maybe he really did believe he was helping. I don't get why they steamrolled past her already having a partner, both the lads knew it. It's weird for that much.

Maggie blankly standing by the open window in range of trash is weird, especially since she like Activates and Becomes Brave right after.

I do wonder... how does Shax know Maggie couldn't pay the rent? That seems awfully specific. Like REALLY specific.

Throne, Dominion or Higher Crowley - what a way to drop that info! That moment hits so hard lol.

"Institutional Problem" I wonder if we'll learn more about The Fall next season. What was it that actually triggered it (in this universe)?

I love that the archangels clearly interact with each other SO LITTLE that no one even knows if Gabriel actually has his own bloody desk lol. Talk about isolation.

Huh. I wonder why Shax didn't get discorporated by the Exploding Halo...

You know who else is wearing a damn turtleneck? SARAQUAEL. OOH. COVERT AGENT? HMMMM

No one looked at the damn box, I still can't believe it. Everyone was so busy Being In A Story that they didn't think of it lol.

Analysis of the last chunk of the episode has been done to death, so I'll finish by underlining that it's SO awfully convenient that Maggie INSISTED that she and Nina talk to "them" while Aziraphale was waylaid by the Metatron.

In fact, it's Very Fortunate that the Metatron made a point of going and sitting at JUSTINE'S CAFE out of sight of the bookshop AND Nina's Cafe. Otherwise Nina might have been like hey you, get in on this chat! Like he knew that was the plan...

Plus the fact that they do that even though Justine's cafe is clearly CLOSED. I doubt she'd be chill with that so I guess she's not around.

Anyway that's enough so here's the TLDR:

The Metatron pretty much just LETS Gabriel escape, knowing that the Archangels will go down and muddle about trying to investigate.

We still don't know why Michael thought they had the right to strike people from the Book of Life. The Metatron seems to think that's out of the question, so where did that idea come from in the first place? It was a major driver of the early plot this season.

It seems convenient that Maggie cried about Nina RIGHT before the Angels arrived to inspect the Jimbriel miracle, and then RIGHT AFTER THAT, Mr Brown (of Brown's World of Carpets) shows up to set up the venue. That alone, all happening in the span of maybe 15 minutes, is a LOT.

It really feels like much of the plot was specifically orchestrated to keep Aziraphale and Crowley apart and NOT TALKING to each other. They keep hiding shit from each other to protect each other, but just hamstring themselves.

[fraudulent-cheese]

I really wanna hear about the skave one(12.)

OH BOYYYY

I'll get this one out of the way immediately. I hate them as a couple.

Ok hate's a little strong? To me, wanting them to be a couple is missing the goddamn point, on top of being an insanely boring outcome and doing the exact thing the ship subverts in canon. No hate to skave shippers, i just dont like this ship as an actual couple.

HOWEVER. As the train wreck they are in canon? Ignoring Lies, Cries and One Big Prize for a second - they rule. Awesome, nearly no notes. I love that they're doomed from the start of their actual romantic advances, that their flaws prevented them from getting in a relationship, hell i'd argue the superficial nature of their crushes is a good thing here since it reinforces both how this relationship wasn't gonna work out AND it feeds into each character's main flaw: a lack of communication.

Neither Dave nor Sky are great at telling the other what they want, and endlessly run on assumssions based on their own expectations and narratives; Sky thinks Dave would understand the competition comes first but Dave isn't doing that, while Dave is convinced Sky wants him bad for half the season and pines very hard after her for multiple challenges. Hell, this lack of communication/ignoring boundaries on Dave's end is set up perfectly by the first actual conversation they have! Sky opens up about her family's history and why she's training for the olympics... And he hasn't listened to a word she said. And then U-turns the conversation to liking her (according to my own recollection, maybe im missremembering). They both have apparent "quirks" related to how they communicate/react to liking someone else that would inhibit good communication for fucks sakes! They were doomed! And i love that! They're both trainwrecks in romance (especially Dave dear god) and it's so, so satisfying to watch it finally grumble by episode 9.

I love how Dave's cockiness is born out of him following the advice Shawn gave him last episode to an extreme, again showing that he's just going off on the assumption on how a "winner" acts. And then! Sky! Tells! Him! Off! Literally my favorite moment of the episode. If reality TV wouldn't let them reconcile i am glad it let Dave pathetically try to get over/get back at Sky while the girl completely brushes him off and really asserts her boundaries. I also like Dave outright eliminating himself afterwards (i dont get why Sky was in the bottom 2 tho...) because like! He would do that! He's only staying here because he's got a crush on the idea of Sky and now it's been destroyed, ofc dude wants out!

...and then the finale happened. Ughhhh why did they do them like thattttt

Look, im still making the tdpi video, but it's been put on the serious backburner since i am in medical school and have very limited access to my computer. But i have an entire paragraph about how i dont like how skave was handled in the finale, i've yapped about it before on here, how it mischaracterises Sky, how the Boyfriend Back Home reveal sucks ass, how Dave's reaction feels like the writters being desperate for an antagonistic force in the finale when Chris is right here, ect... Im not going there again. TLDR, i really dont like it.

Uh if you want more thoughts about them in canon, i'd recommend reading this post by @/leonave since it's really good. Anyways

NOW FOR WHAT I WANTED FOR MY REWRITE.

Now the thing is that i dont think there's much wrong with the start of the season. This applies to the set-up of Sky and Dave's dynamic; Dave crushing on Sky because she helped him makes sense with the way he seems to view her, and the way their crushes feel so artificial (ESPECIALLY on Sky's end) is actually beneficial to the direction i wanted to go with them - namely, that Sky isn't really crushing on Dave and Dave realises how superficial his crush was. And wasn't as intense as he thought it was. Obviously the conversation is a little awkward - Dave still wouldn't take rejection well, but is also trying to be supportive because he does like talking to Sky and also he basically just came on international television by accident and Dave isn't that terrible of a person - and they wouldn't be on good terms for a bit, but they would resolve the conflict and actually become friends afterwards. Eventually. They're still not great at communication and are also dealing with confusing emotions on reality TV.

uhhh idk what else to add to this post so uh. Here's Sky and Dave friendship propaganda with some yuri added ontop lol

[idleglowingpixels]

talk about Collector

WHYYYYYYYYYY okay now that I got that off my chest let's get serious LMAO

Before I dive in too deep, to any other ppl reading, THIS IS YOUR FAIR WARNING IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ ANY CRITICISM OF TOH. Something that is really apparent in this fandom particularly is that a lot of ppl refuse to allow and accept genuine criticism discussions, dumbing it down to personal biases, misinterpretations of the text (or in this case, the show), and proclaiming "It's intentional that the show did that!" every time someone breathes something negative about it. This is ESPECIALLY annoying with the "Blame Disney/the shortening" nonsense -- a key skill in television writing is to be capable of working with the allotted time that the studios give you. After they were told Season 3 got cut short, they still had 11 22-minute episodes of Season 2 and all three 40+ minute episodes of Season 3 to conclude the story in a satisfying way.

Seeking and reading criticism posts outside of the general tags, ignoring warnings on posts that give forewarnings, then getting mad and upset that someone criticized your comfort show is generally an unhealthy behavior, especially if you're not in a good mental state. If you can't take people criticizing something you enjoy, and more-so if you deem it your comfort media, and feel the need to bother them because you made yourself upset reading their posts, you've got a lot of soul searching to do. That, or maybe you should log off until you can handle it.

Also, obviously, spoilers ahead for TOH, as well as Amphibia because these shows parallel a lot more than I want them to. :')

---

I have a LOT to say about The Owl House from a critical and writing perspective, and I feel like the show is EXTREMELY overhyped for what it actually is. I feel its sister show Amphibia executed much of the same/similar themes better, and that's not even a bias thing. Just from the way both shows are written, you can tell which one feels more competently structured from a narrative standpoint (and, let's be honest, which one is actually funny).

Okay enough about general opinion, let's get to Collector. From a character design perspective, GOD I love this little guy, both the reflection/shadow form and the actual form are distinct from the rest of the cast. I'm a big Sun and Moon design/symbolism enjoyer (Sun and Moon from FNAF, Sun and Blake from RWBY, Celestia and Luna from MLP:FiM, etc.) so these types of characters are always welcome. And while their voice annoys me personally it ABSOLUTELY fits them, so no matter how annoying I find it I don't think I'd want them to have any other voice.

But that, unfortunately, is the only props I can give to Collector.

The show is FULL of redeemed antagonists that range from okay (I'd like to think Amity was decent enough and Hunter was alright but definitely should have been introduced earlier so his redemption was a slow burn but this post isn't about them so I'll end this note here) to "what the actual fuck" (Idc what anyone says, there is no excuses PERIOD, Lilith's redemption was the absolute worst redemption arc I think I've ever seen AND I'VE SEEN CATRA'S), and Collector is very much on the lower end of that scale. We hardly see them overall and their character writing is rushed beyond belief -- and again, I'd like to reiterate that that is ENTIRELY on the writing team for the show. Disney and the shortening DID NOT DECIDE TO KEEP COLLECTOR IN. The writing staff were aware of the time they had left and made the decision to shoehorn them in and expect everyone to just be okay with it.

From a writing perspective, they bloat the story exponentially and 100% should have been left in the drafts or saved for future content like what Dana said she might do if she is able to through books and such. If we only get hints of the other Collectors, this one should have STAYED hints with them.

We have essentially no significant amount of time with them outside of Hollow Mind and the season 2 finale before season 3, and what we DO have of them in season 2B is so drastically different I'd consider 2B Collector and 3 Collector as two different characters entirely. And before you tell me, "They're different because sun/moon symbolism!" "They're different because Belos and King influence them differently!" etc. etc., don't waste your time. Yes, those are good explanations as to why they feel so different between seasons, but that does not make the writing of the character inherently good. Allow me to elaborate:

In S2B, of what little we see of Collector, they are extremely sadistic in nature, and while they appear childish the writing of that lack of care for others is ABUNDANTLY CLEAR. And it seemed that way even as Belos first encountered him as Philip in the flashback episode. There, they weren't yet "influenced" by Belos and his plans; hell, he hardly had an actual plan yet.

Skip ahead to Hollow Mind, easily the best episode of Season 2 imo, and Collector is taunting Belos, mocking him and his schemes. Saying things like "Ooh, you were mad!" and "I'm starting to think you make those [grimwalkers] just to destroy them. You have fun with it, admit it!"

I cannot find any reasonable explanation as to how or why Belos would influence Collector into doing such things. Why would he want a little pain in the ass making fun of him for hundreds of years? And by his response to Collector's taunt about the grimwalkers and Hunter, "Of course I don't, Collector. It hurts every time he chooses to betray me," he took offense to their words, but kept his tone from shifting to anger as he does with everyone else because of Collector's power.

Belos doesn't want Collector thinking he doesn't like them because of their abilities, but he does want to stay on their good side for information. For knowledge of spells. And he puts up with Collector's annoyances because of that.

Essentially, that wasn't something Belos taught them or influenced them to do. All Collector knows is to adapt to their friends' behaviors, yes, but Belos is like, over 400 years old. I don't know about you, but I doubt with the way he speaks and how he's written that he would taunt his underlings in the same childish vain as Collector, and do so enough for Collector to pick up and mimic that behavior.

Now to the finale, their appearance is pretty much just them getting duped by Belos and sent into the depths of the titan skull, where King ever-so-conveniently finds them, making the pinky swear that releases them.

They maintain that mocking attitude even after Belos betrays them, calling King "boring" for calling them Mr. Collector and feeling generally disinterested by King before he promises a game to play. And even after they're released, they continue the attitude further with the whole "I remember someone throwing me off a bridge...I'm not angry, though!" bit, only to send Belos to his "death" moments after, deeming it as a game of tag. They've seen Belos kill grimwalkers first hand, fully aware that their lives mean nothing, and replicated the behavior by returning the favor to Belos (or so they thought). Their lack of care continues when they nearly try to do the same thing to the Hexsquad, people who didn't even do anything to them, before King stops them, changing the subject before they can cause further harm.

After stopping the draining spell, Collector continues the destructive maliciousness they have all the way to the end of the episode, and that's the impression of them we're left with. They were sadistic, uncaring and childish, but only learned the behavior of killing from Belos -- even though Belos didn't actually die, the intent was to kill him, and they were fully planning to continue with the Hexsquad.

And then...We get to Season 3.

Just a side-note, I think it's a safe assumption to say the first 2 seasons of The Owl House took place between roughly 2 months, as Luz was outside waiting to leave for a summer camp after the school year ended before initially arriving in the demon realm. Going off of that assumption, in Part 1 Luz returned to school as she returned to the human realm, presumably in late August/early September due to her living in Connecticut. And since Part 1 takes place in the timespan of about 3-7 days, the last day being Halloween, the timeskip only brought us about 2 more months ahead. Keep this in mind.

After Luz and co. return to the demon realm in Part 2 -- objectively the worst episode of the season -- we already see King's influence on Collector since they turned everyone into puppets instead of actively injuring or killing them when they don't comply. Still bad? Yes. But from how it looks in Part 3 with the Hexsquad, it seems more like the puppets' consciences are just comatose or an alternative to sleeping, maybe in a REM-like state. But of course, the show didn't have enough time to explain that further over all the nonsense in Part 2.

Anyway, when we see Collector in Part 2, they're still being childish, which is unfortunately the only thing that stays consistent with this character. They then say two lines that were the most god-awful writing decisions I've seen in a hot minute, and this show is STOCK FULL of really bad "this is peak humor LAUGH" moments like this.

They say that Eda has this "cool aunt vibe" and such, which sounds like one of those "character dynamics/tropes" posts on social media like Tumblr and whatnot. It comes off as really pretentious in the writing, and was shockingly unfunny to hear for a show that calls itself a comedy. Another line that frustrates me, more-so for lore reasons, is when they ask Odalia to make pizza bagels, when it was previously stated that human food is inaccessible to Luz during her time in the demon realm. So not only is it contradicting that whole thing (Eda actively struggled to find food for Luz that she could eat), how would they or King even know what one is or how to actually make one??

It seems like a small point to get heated over, but it once again feels like one of those stupid one-liners that one of the writers thought was the funniest shit they've ever thought up and kept it in because they knew die-hard fans would just laugh it off and brush it off as a joke, and that the writers forgetting about Eda's maternal struggle to feed her adopted kid is Disney's/the shortening's fault because they're at fault for everything wrong with the show...and not the ppl who wrote it.

Regardless, this whole shtick is extremely out-of-character for the way they had spoken in Season 2, and from what I can recall (I'm not gonna rewatch the entire show for the sake of a single post), King never talks like this. Luz does around him, but he himself doesn't talk like this.

I've discussed with friends before about this, including Robin (the one who asked me to talk about this), but from Part 2 onward Collector gets the same Luz-like writing every character that gets redeemed suddenly dawns out of the blue. I started calling it luz-ification, but it doesn't just happen to Collector.

It happened to Hunter, where his more cocky and ego-centric dialogues from early 2A was dropped for a more "comedic" personality and an anxiety-ridden character, though it's later eluded to that his cocky attitude was him masking his true self, so I try to keep it to that perspective.

But this happened to Lilith as well, where she suddenly started acting like "Cool Aunt Lilith" IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING HER ADMITTING TO CURSING EDA AND ALLOWING HER CAPTURE. WITH NO CONSEQUENCES TO BE FACED OTHER THAN THE CURSE SPLIT WHICH IS HARDLY UTILIZED IN THE SHOW.

(Side-tangent: Characters facing little to no consequences for their actions is something that goes on so much in this show but this is long enough already and I really don't like talking about this shit for long 'cause I could be using my time on better pieces of media, I'm sure there's plenty of posts explaining this point elsewhere by ppl who enjoyed TOH more than me)

Hell, it even happened to Amity for a hot minute. For some moments in the show she's written really off-character and saying things that just completely contradict how she's typically written, but then goes back to the more sassy and balanced character later on.

This post has gotten WAY longer than I wanted it to be, but to keep me from spending even more time on this, Part 2 shows a drastically different Collector, to the point that they do not by any means have the same character writing as they had before. They got luz-ified. Using social media lingo they couldn't even have access to in canon, and being written to quite literally just sound like a mini-me of Luz with the more obnoxious undertones of the childish thing.

Point is, they mimic these behaviors of Luz that they wouldn't even have reasonable access to learning from, because she's in the human realm for almost all the time after their release. It only makes sense in Part 3, when Luz is actually there for them to see her behaviors in action, but even that is so contrived and rushed that it feels unrealistic and narratively unnecessary. Remember what I said before about the timeskip only being 2 months? Yeah, 2 months isn't nearly enough time for a character to fundamentally change who they are as drastically as Collector.

Now to the part where I talk about Amphibia really quick and mention how it did the whole "having an alternative threat acting as a mini-boss" thing a million times better than this shit ever could. King Andrias, paralleling Collector for this particular scenario, is shown relatively early on that he's an antagonist to the audience. It's later revealed as a plot twist not to the audience, but to the characters, who least expected it. They don't waste time trying to throw off the audience with red herrings or telling its audience "He's not a bad guy, he's totally not going to be evil later on." They just show the audience he's evil and keep the story moving.

He's given enough time to feel like this ominous, looming threat, and True Colors masterfully showed how messed up this guy is and the lengths he is willing to go to ascend to the Core and cheat death, just as the souls within the Core had. His motive to avoid death and return Amphibia to the world-conquering ideologies from centuries' past is what made him such a love-to-hate villain. And the motive to cheat death in a children's cartoon? Metal as hell. The Core also parallels Belos here, and further on in Season 3, being the one manipulating Andrias through his fear of death in order to make him do what they want him to.

In the third season, Andrias continues his work by the Core's demands, only giving up in the final battle when he's read a letter from someone he had considered a friend long ago, which admittedly didn't have much set-up but it was at least the focus of an entire episode prior to the big pre-finale.

At the end of the series, he's shown to have moved on, allowing himself to age naturally and to stop using technology to keep him in pristine condition for eternity. He accepted the natural cycle of life, and in turn accepted that he will come to pass one day. He wasn't a perfectly written character, but considering what it's being compared to? Leagues better.

Like I said before, TL;DR, Collector is the bloatware of The Owl House's plot. They were shoved in as a last minute addition because they were the writers' "precious bean silly goose little gremlin blorbo" that they couldn't just keep in the drafts with the rest of the collectors. So instead of maintaining what little integrity the show's writing had to begin with and follow through to the end with the Day of Unity plotline being the series finale (Which was VERY OBVIOUSLY WHAT THEY WERE GOING FOR), they essentially made a side quest distraction that dragged the story on for longer than it needed to, wasting the audience's time.

I'm not mad that the Collector exists, I just find that their inclusion in the series did more harm than good for the writing. The show has a serious issue with giving screentime to unnecessary characters like the miscellaneous Hexside students, giving characters too much screentime (The biggest offender for this is Amity, there's more episodes centered around her than Hunter, Willow and Gus combined) and not giving ACTUALLY necessary characters enough screentime (Looking at you, Emerald Trio).

I really want to rewrite TOH, and if I feel the need to rewrite a show, it's usually because there's too much fundamentally wrong with it for me to give it anything higher than a 6/10 overall. But I've already got a whole AU and a whole rewrite in the works for two other series I care wayyyyy more about, so that's gonna have to be left to other writers in this fandom.

---

If this post is how you've stumbled upon my page, hi :') Feel free to ask me about more or to elaborate on smth I said here if you want clarification, but if you check out my intro post and see another mutual interest we have maybe ask me about that instead of TOH please and thank you

[airlocksandaviaries]

Every Data Outfit Ever, Rated (pt 2)

^^^ HOLY FUCKING SHIT YOU GUYS. THATS A LOT OF NOTES. IT’S TIME FOR PART 2 ARE YOU READAYYYYYY

#13 - The Classic Yellow Uniform (S3 Version)

6/10

Oh to wear one of these bad boys. The later season design for the Starfleet Unifrom are *chef’s kiss*. It looks thicker and more substantial, which is stylish and functional. But unfortunately that does mean we get to see less of his glorious dobonohonkeros. Knocking off some points for that. (But before we move on I just want to take this second to admire how radiant he looks in this frame. Beautiful man).

#14 - Henry V Data

3/10

I genuinely want to know what was running through the costume designers’ heads when they allowed this to happen. Yes it’s a Shakespeare production, but that doesn’t mean you need to create this affront to aesthetics. Don’t get me wrong, the costume itself isn’t actually that bad! I mean, the cloak and doublet have some serious potential. I’m actually into this look. What I’m talking about is the HAIR. Speaks for itself. Absolutely fucking not.

#15 - Yarr Lives AU Data

6.5/10

Okay hear me out. LET ME FINISH. I know it’s the exact same as the normal s3 uniform but you’re neglecting to consider the fact that I am insane. The violent alternate timeline just had such good lighting, okay? He’s literally glowing. Adds just that little bit of extra spice it needed.

#16 - Barclay’s Holodeck RPF Data

4/10

Is it aesthetically pleasing? No. Is it attractive? Absolutely not. Is he holding an epeé? Yes he is and that’s all that matters. I physically couldn’t rate it below a 3 if I tried. The outfit is an atrocity but he’s holding a sword which begs the question what would it be like to fence him. I am dying to know.

#17 - Kidnapped Data

0/10

LOOK WHAT THEY’VE DONE TO MY BOY. That bitchass collector guy turned him into a sex slave and coerced him to wear this outfit by threatening to murder someone. Disgusting. And for a queer-coded villain, he didn’t even have good fashion sense. This is probably the worst outfit I’ve ever seen in my life. You couldn’t pay me to put it on. You couldn’t make me put it on if you threatened to kill someone. I’m not as sweet as Data. I would have said let that bitch die cause there aint no way I’m letting this eye crime anywhere NEAR my body.

#18 - Lore Swapped Their Fucking Outfits Again

2/10

Yikes. Lore must have been in a REALLY tough spot after he escaped the Crystalline Entity because there is NO WAY any self respecting gay man would have worn something like this if he didn���t absolutely HAVE to. The only redeemable quality about this is that it kind of resembles a sweatshirt which is kinda funny but other than that, Lore, come on. Get it together, girlypop. Ain’t no way you’re walking around like this.

#19 - Red Shirt Data

20/10

hhfhmghh. I am. I am lookingh respcetfuly. Holy oh my fuck. This is doing somethign to me. The fact that they only let this happen for ONE SINGLE episode, AND during one of Riker’s many hallucinations was a CRIME. But I understand why they did it. The world can’t handle Red Shirt Data. I can’t handle Red Shirt Data. I have to move on now before I stare at this forever.

#20 - Keiko’s Wedding

9/10

Everything about this. The flower. The skirt. The gender. He looks beautiful and I’d like to imagine he’d wear something like this to his own wedding. With Geordi. Adorable, amazing, perfect, I love my android boy. ALSO look at his little SMILEEEEE AAAACKK-

#21 - Friar Tuck Data

1/10

Costume designers. WYA. I just wanna talk. He’s too hot for this shit and YOU FUCKING KNOW IT. (insert Bernie Sanders meme: I am once again asking why you would give him this haircut.) Not only is it uglier than the last bad haircut you gave him, but you also put him in a friar’s robes. That’s just straight up homophobic. 

Well, folks, that concludes Data’s Outfits Rated, part 2. Yes I combed through the entirety seasons 3 and 4 for this, and hooooo boy were there a lot of outfits. But trust me, folks, the best is yet to come. We’ve barely scratched the surface. Once again, feel free to send in any you think I’ve missed. Come back and join me for part 3, out soon. (also thanks for the reblogs on the first one you guys, I’m so glad you like it).

Part 1

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: "Wings of the Master"

Hera focus this time 'round, let's go flying.

Technically not a Friendship Fetch Quest episode, at least in terms of allies specifically for the Ghost crew. We DO gain an ally, but he and his creation are really more useful to the wider Rebellion at large. That is also a major recurring theme of the show: Building up the Rebellion piece by piece, ship by ship, cell by cell, person by person.

Not entirely sure why Kallus is heading up an Imperial blockade, that doesn't usually seem his area of expertise.

I think we're supposed to understand that Empire learned about them trying to smuggle aid to Ibaar and enacted the blockade to capture/destroy them but... honestly they just seem really really petty about preventing this one planet in particular from getting food.

It's always weird when one of the background bit roles is clearly just Steve Blum or Freddie Prince Jr.

Hera taking control and barking orders at everyone one by one, a nice hint foreshadowing that she's our focal character for today.

Sad Hera makes the heart hurteth. :(

Oooh, really liking this 360 dolly shot around the briefing holodisplay and the way the harp notes almost seem like they're in time with Rex's steps.

Kanan volunteers Hera for the mission to retrieve the B-wing and booooooooy the bad takes I had to see about that. Fandom could not give the boys a break, always took some of the most reaching uncharitable interpretations of everything they did.

(Fortunately most of them went away after the Season Two finale, with occasional hiccups.)

All I'm gonna say is that it was clear from the action prologue and basically the entirety of how Hera'd been acting that she was tunnel visioning and needed to be broken out of that single-goal mindset, or at least redirected to go after the solution that would actively help.

I do wonder if the reason Hera was so unusually determined to blunt force her way past the blockade had anything to do with her Clone Wars experiences. Ryloth was blockaded and starved out as well.

You know, after the crap he dealt with last episode it's really kind of nice to see Ezra feeling and acting lighter, he seems much less stressed.

Also this whole exchange is hilarious. Love Ezra banging on Chopper's dome and then pretending he didn't do it.

A new cue starts up here, a bit akin to the "Victory" leitmotif, sounds like snare drums handling the beat there maybe. Makes it sound a bit more exotic.

This whole sequence has some great camerawork and blocking. Really makes you feel the speed and wind and hard turns.

I appreciate that they could have played Zeb's weight tilting the ship dangerously off the edge for laughs but didn't, they stayed very serious throughout.

Quarrie is obviously named after Ralph McQuarrie, one of the big concept artists for the Original Trilogy. A nice little homage.

There's this really pretty quality to how Quarrie's irises are painted. Rebels' eye models are always so detailed and vibrant and look like a lot of hard work to make so consistently lovely, I totally get why the animators sometimes went out of their way to avoid doing them lol.

I'm frankly still a little confused by Quarrie's initial refusal to let them take the B-wing. I guess he was doing a Secret Test Of Character and once he heard why Hera was motivated to fly he decided she was up to snuff?

The set design for Quarrie's shipyard is nice though.

A little bit of Hera backstory! Honestly, I never thought Hera as a character needed much explanation; What we get about her motivation and past in this episode is pretty much all we need. (We get more obviously when we meet her dad but that's kind of a bonus.) Hera is straightforward (passionate about flying, channeled her skills and passion into the Rebellion) and her character arc is nearly already complete by the time we meet her, only missing that reconciliation with her father.

She doesn't have as many character struggles but then she doesn't exactly need them. She knows who she is, what she wants, what motivates her, and there's something to be said for that kind of self-assuredness.

The show would shake up her foundations later, as things got more serious but for now this was just enough character exploration to satisfy.

Anyway, Hera's speech is what Quarrie was waiting for, apparently, and he lets her test fly the B-wing.

This beautiful sweeping cue I think might be Hera's theme. It first turns up in this episode and has played periodically throughout.

I know a lot of fans have praised this flying sequence so let me just add to the chorus, it's really good. You get a solid sense of the speed and maneuverability of the B-wing.

Lol Sabine and Quarrie spatting over who's going to modify and refine the B-Wing.

The Phantom gets a mid-season upgrade, now capable of hyperspace travel on its own, independent of the Ghost, a feature which gets puts to a LOT of use the rest of the season as Kanan and Ezra split off from the rest more and more.

Running a blockade stationed on one side of a planet might seem weird when there's a whole back half of the planet that's not blocked off but remember, hyperspace lanes are a thing, it takes more work and effort to chart new paths through hyperspace than it does to just use the existing lane, which will only let you out at a certain spot. All the Empire has to do is sit in front of that spot to prevent you from maneuvering around and outflanking them.

The new Rebel Alliance cue that we heard in the first season finale makes an appearance to herald Hera's arrival.

"Oh shit that's my wife, lol y'all screwed now."

And the B-wing takes out a huge chunk of one of the Imperial cruisers. This is why developing the TIE Defenders became so important, never underestimate the importance of fighter superiority.

The success of the mission prompts Sato to promote Hera officially to Phoenix Leader and everyone looks so proud of her. As they should lol.

This is one of my husband's favorite episodes. If we're consuming Rebels like comfort food it's one of the ones he tends to pick. The man likes starfighters and the B-wing is his favorite, what can I say?

It's not a very complicated episode but it's beautiful and leaves me feeling light and happy.

Sabine's turn for basic backstory and minor character development is next and... well I'll just comment about it when I get there.