#old show biz
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“On January 4, Jayne (wearing a leopard-skin cape, hat and muff) told Louella Parsons, “We are going to have a very quiet wedding and then we’ll fly to Dallas where my mother plans to give a reception for our friends there.” Then everyone had a good laugh and went to work on the real plans. The happy couple held another press event, showing off her ring and trousseau. They sent out one hundred invitations (on pink paper, of course). “This is one time I don’t want a lot of publicity,” Jayne unconvincingly told the assembled reporters and cameramen. (“It just happens that most of her friends are newspapermen,” said Jim Byron). Jayne and Mickey chose January 13 for the wedding date, “because Mickey and I met on the 13th. He won the Mr. Universe contest on the 13th and got his American citizenship on the 13th. I just love that number.” Jayne added, “I’m so happy. We’re both on a pink cloud.” Jayne picked the Wayfarer’s Chapel in Palos Verdes for the wedding – designed by Lloyd Wright (son of Frank Lloyd Wright) in the 1940s, it was a modernistic glass and wood building that looked like the skeleton of a church. Glass was the key factor here: people who couldn’t get into the wedding could still see it – and photograph it. The only concern being would they crash through the walls in a disaster of blood and shards? “I want the ceremony to be serious and serene,” Jayne reiterated. “It’s going to be entirely free of photographers. Except maybe just one, from the studio. Well, I don’t suppose I can keep the photographers away if they want to come.” Andrew Carthew of the Daily Herald wrote that Jayne described the wedding, “with some slight irreverence, as the Greatest Publicity Stunt in History.”
/ From the 2021 biography Jayne Mansfield: The Girl Couldn’t Help It by Eve Golden /
On this day 66 years ago (13 January 1958), quintessential show business couple Jayne Mansfield and Miklós "Mickey" Hargitay married. Their tumultuous on-and-off relationship would play out within the flashbulbs of international paparazzi. They would have three children together, perform together on film and onstage in Las Vegas, ultimately divorcing in 1964. (Mansfield would die in 1967, Hargitay in 2006).
#jayne mansfield#mickey hargitay#lobotomy room#sex kitten gone berserk#platinum blonde#publicity stunt#starlet#old show biz#kitsch#jayne mansfield and mickey hargitay#show biz couple#old hollywood#classic hollywood#glamour#wedding day#bride and groom#retro
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Pop a cork! Today (13 August) is National Prosecco Day! I call this photo “The Vices of Anita Ekberg”. (Look, I know Anita is inevitably drinking champagne here rather than prosecco, but work with me, OK?).
#prosecco#national prosecco day#anita ekberg#vices#hedonism#decadence#la dolce vita#lobotomy room#old show biz#old hollywood#sex goddess
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okay but lil Channie singing i still call australia home for a blip on the boat...
#oooh go on and give us a proper cover then 😇#i love that gay old song#and it is gay bc peter allen was gay#he was also married to liza minelli . thats just 50 yr old show biz history for you#trust liza to marry some random gay australian country boy from the middle of nowhere
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love the idea of Cali and Nevada preforming together as a show of entertainment states
and they both present entirely femme for it in different ways and its a beautifully constructed choreography where they flow seamlessly in and out of the leading and starring roles, they're leaning into each other so much to pull off some of these moves its hard to tell where one ends and the other begins, at some points they may as well just be having sex on stage
at the end well, Cal was a diva back in the day, he knows the character and story you present off stage is almost more important than the one you present on,
so as they take their final bows there is so much causal touching and palpable tension and you can almost follow each beat the Romance they're weaving with their eyes
and then they step out of sight and they are immediately the cattiest fucking bitches to each other
after a show all gloves are off in a way they are no where else
Performance skill? Looks? Politics? Decades old history? Relationship drama? Body issues? It's all on the table, they better get their mascara off before they start crying
#New York's knees and back are about to give out just watching them#old show biz grandpa<3#wttt#welcome to the table#wttsh#welcome to the statehouse#ben brainard#wttt california#wttt nevada
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In Memoriam: Italian sex goddess Gina Lollobrigida (née Luigia Lollobrigida, 4 July 1927- 16 January 2023) died one year ago today. Alongside her arch-rival Sophia Loren, in the fifties and sixties “La Lollo” would become (as film historian Ken Wlaschin put it) “as closely identified with Italy as spaghetti and opera” and (as author Shawn Levy put it) “a living vessel for a variety of ideas about Italy, female beauty and the Mediterranean temperament”. She also popularized the ��poodle” haircut! For what it’s worth, my favourite Lollobrigida movie is the bizarre 1968 giallo Death Laid an Egg (aka Plucked).
Gina Lollobrigida, 1958
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ok so update uhm we found another toy shop thirty minutes away and erm. here are some pics of it
ok so maybe some things happen for a reason.
#I will take a picture of the two ponies I got :3c#But ohmigosh they even had the Care Bears COUSINS#I wanted braveheart SOOO bad but my dad was questioning me of ‘since when did I like care bears’ and I was like be so fr …#One of my very first pictures is me six months old holding funshine bear.#Whatevs It’s ok i still got two toys so I am not upset. Still thinking about poor cafe ole though#All alone.#anyways erm the store was HUMONGOUS it had even vintage midge and skipper!!!#but my dad also had an attitude with me everytime I tried to show him a toy he was very upset with me.#I just wanted to show him the cool toys and tell him about it but it just bummed me out a lot#I even saw Chuck E. Cheese toy there. No sign of CEC pony tho. But like it was show biz era chuck toy#And rainbow brite and gremlins and just a lawt of great stuff both modern and retro#Btw this was just some of the shelves. There was like a lot of things it was like walking into a toys r us
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the way some of you guys don’t understand industries at all is astonishing
#olive.txt#‘the nfl is a terrible messy industry that uses xyz for profit’ like yeah! that’s because it’s an ✨industry✨#show business does that too#like a lot#but i don’t see people bashing on taylor for dating a guy in her own industry#y’all would shrivel up and die if you found out about old hollywood#it’s not cool that the nfl does that but like#it’s not nfl exclusive#show biz/the music industry is just quieter in their shittiness#which is objectively worse than being open about it
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On this day in show biz history 54 years ago (29 August 1969): fabulous bouffant-maned, white-lipsticked pop goddess Nancy Sinatra made her Las Vegas performing debut! The Nancy Sinatra Show - her 3-week residency at The International Hotel - included special guest stars The Osmond Brothers, The Blossoms and Mac Davis. I seem to recall reading in one of Sinatra’s album liner notes that her opening number was “Light My Fire” by The Doors, which she sang while gowned by Donnfeld and dramatically descending a spectacular staircase. Ah, for a time machine!
Nancy Sinatra
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On a seemingly random Tuesday night, a few members of the Bat Family are free to spend dinner at the manner.
Jason was benched by his fellow Outlaws for a nasty hit to his chest and got tired of Biz’s worrying even if it was appreciated at first.
Dick had been taking a small break after a particularly bad case with work that involved some hurt children and wanted to be back home.
Damian had only ever made threats to move about but the newley eighteen year old was still at home.
Tim had been using his free time while Kon and Cassie visited their families to visit his own while Bart and Barry dragged Wally on a bonding trip. The poor West boy had to miss out a concert of some sort.
Stephanie, Duke and Cass were all busy with a case and had pleaded with Bruce to take some time off because he was, quote, “Broodier than Hamlet”. He eventually relented when Barbie and Kate promised to keep an eye on them.
The group had decided to watch a movie instead of playing games, mainly because not games were banned, and settled on something that Tim paid no mind to.
The problem came that it was cold out and everyone insisted on having the fire as hot as it could go, but Tim naturally ran hot. Jason and Damian tended to get the coldest and while only Jason would complain, Damian could and would set anything he wanted on fire to get warm.
So, Tim didn’t complain and just said he was going to get changed.
He spent at least half an hour on one of the arm chairs by himself with his tablet playing RuneScape, when Dick inhaled so quickly everyone heard it.
Tim assumed it was something to do with the movie and didn’t turn, tapping away at his screen, completely ignorant to Dick’s quickly forming tears.
It was when Bruce also made a noise, this time a poorly pronounced ‘oh’ that he turned around, assuming it had to be a truely grand thing for Bruce to react so openly in the movie.
Instead he finds his foster father and brothers staring at him.
More specifically, his thighs.
Tim hadn’t realised his shorts would ride up and stop covering him to just above his knee and show the hundreds of scars littered over the outside and inside of his pale skin. They were mostly faded, but with the width of some of them they were always going to be visible, especially with the sheer amount.
Pulling his pant leg down, Tim doesn’t bother to hide a sympathetic wince and says, “Sorry, didn’t meant to show them. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”
He looks away again, assuming that was that and trying to remind himself that it wasn’t his fault that people were upset by his scars, just like Black Canary told him.
Instead he hears a sob and turns back to find Bruce holding Dicks hand as his oldest brother sobs into his hand. He sees that Jason is seemingly fighting to not match him even with his wide eyes and Damian is staring at him with confusion.
Realisation finds Tim quickly, which makes sense considering he’s supposed to be the ‘smart Robin’.
“You didn’t know…”
Dick stands up, dropping Bruce’s hand and comes to kneel before Tim, holding onto his own hands like some kind of follower to a god, “Why? I- I don’t- why?”
The desperation in his voice makes Tim feel sick, and he looks around at the others for help because surely he had talked to at least one of them about it? He had been open with his friends, and he hadn’t exactly kept it a secret, but he did avoid showing them…
Tim moves to hold onto Dick in return, “I’m sorry, I thought you guys knew-… okay, look, I’ve got a two year clean streak and I’m in therapy, okay? I’m so sorry Dick, I just assumed you knew cause I use the shower in the cave with you guys and… I’m so sorry.”
There’s a silence for a moment as Dick drags him into his arms and squeezes him as tightly as he can, not even being careful like he usually would.
“I don’t understand.”
Damian’s voice sounds uncharacteristic in how small it is. He’s staring at Tim’s legs like he might be able to catch a glimpse of the scars in genuine confusion.
Bruce seemingly can’t speak and so Jason tries his best to explain to the youngest Wayne boy, “Look, bra-kid, some times when people aren’t doing to well they… they hurt themselves. Tim…”
Giving his brother a smile, Tim takes over as tears finally break away from Jason. Jason was always the most emotional and that’s evident in how he actually lets Bruce pull him into a side hug.
“Dami, you know how my parents kind of sucked?”
Damian makes a scoff noise, “I know they were incompetent, yes.”
Smiling, Tim continues as his eyes grow wet with the sound of his families cries, “Well, I really wanted to good for them but they had impossible standards. When I found I couldn’t reach them, I decided I needed punishment. So…” he takes a deep inhale and moves a hand to Dick’s head to comfort him as he finishes. “I started to cut myself.”
Damian doesn’t get wide eyes or anything, and Tim thinks it’s so much worse that there’s an image understanding in his little brothers eyes that show he sees that as completely logical.
But it is quickly overcome, his first thought always what he was raised with and quickly followed by the ideals he’s learnt and now values. He doesn’t cry either, but he does have a look of a pure heart break in his sweet little eyes.
Bruce finally comes over and pulls his two sons into a hug, adjusting to fit Jason in and saying nothing as Damian comes up behind Tim and leans his head against the others back.
Bruce asks other a few minutes of holding each other, “You said you haven’t for two years?”
Tim smiles once again and presses a kiss to his dad’s cheek. “Yeah. I learnt that family, real family like ours, would never want physical punishment, especially for something we can’t control. That’s not how loving people work.”
Damian moves to wrap his arms around Tim in their first ever hug and by all gods and mighty beings is Tim glad he stuck around.
Hugs from his family was well worth it.
#batfam#tim drake#bat family#dc comics#batfamily#dc universe#dc#tim drake is red robin#tim drake is a menace#damian wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#bruce wayne#Tim Drake angst#tim drake centric#sh mention
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“Cary Grant has strong claims to be the greatest actor of the American cinema; he has starred in an astonishing number of classic films over a very long period of time and is a consummate master of timing and a performer of such naturalness that critics rarely think of him as acting (he never won a Best Actor Oscar). His screen persona is one of the glories of the Hollywood movie, much imitated but never equalled, always charming but never quite trustworthy, utterly debonair but exceedingly masculine, nonchalant but always aware, seemingly devil-may-care but suspiciously organised. He was the favourite actor of two of the great American directors, Howard Hawks and Alfred Hitchcock, and his 35-year career has featured him opposite most of the great female stars from Mae West and Jean Harlow to Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn- but especially Katharine Hepburn. He seemed virtually never to age and was even more charming in his fifties than he was in his thirties.”
/ From The Illustrated Encylopedia of the World’s Great Movie Stars by Ken Wlaschin, 1979 /
Born on this day 120 years ago: ultimate matinee idol and the personification of suave, Cary Grant (né Archibald Alec Leach, 18 January 1904 – 29 November 1986). Pictured: Grant in the 1950s with the fabulous Mae West (who regularly claimed to have “discovered” him and he was too chivalrous to contradict).
Stage and Screen Personalities from 1955: Mae West and Cary Grant
#cary grant#mae west#suave#handsome#matinee idol#leading man#old hollywood#classic hollywood#golden age hollywood#old show biz#lobotomy room#movie star
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“People, remember this name: Ann-Margret. Simple and easy, just like the girl herself. Ann-Margret, 19, is the girl who will become the biggest Swede in Hollywood since Greta Garbo and Ingrid Bergman. She's a sexy, beautiful, intelligent, ambitious, green-eyed brunette. She sings, dances and acts. Critics have said: "She moves like Elvis, we call her 'The Animal, her voice should be X-rated, she's filming with Bette Davis, she stars with Pat Boone and Bobby Darin.” Audiences have said: "She's what's happening in show business". One of her records has sold 1 million copies, and for a long time she's been on the hit lists. So, here's the advice one more time - remember this name: Ann-Margret. She's already big, and she'll be bigger still.”
/ The Swedish magazine Bild Journalen hyperventilating over hot new starlet-of-the-moment Ann-Margret in 1961, when her image was being pitched somewhere between “female Elvis” / “New Marilyn” (or “New Rita Hayworth”) and “America's answer to Brigitte Bardot”. (You can tell this article is early in her career because the most famous of devilish redheads is still a brunette!) /
Today should be a religious holiday: triple threat (actress, singer, dancer), Valsjöbyn’s finest export and quintessential sex-kitten-gone-berserk the fabulous Ann-Margret (born 28 April 1941) turns 82! Coincidentally, she recently dropped Born to Be Wild, a collection of rock’n’roll standards and her first new album in years. It’s as bizarre and kitsch as you’d expect from A-M – and merits a whole separate post! Pictured: Ann-Margret in 1968.
#ann-margret#sex kitten gone berserk#triple threat#american Bardot#lobotomy room#kitsch#old show biz#old hollywood#female elvis#fierce#kween#diva
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for @steddie-week day 5 | exes to lovers
fully and completely inspired by @emchant3d's divorced dad's post [x] from a few weeks ago bc i did not once stop thinking abt it
tags: modern day, artist!eddie, finance guy!steve, steddie as rich gay divorcees, sort of an accidental parent trap situation
They were too young, Steve thinks in retrospect – married at twenty-three, their daughter born when they were twenty-five, and then divorced before his twenty-seventh birthday.
He gets to think retrospectively because in a few years it’ll be a full decade since the papers for that last bit got signed. Now, Steve is thirty-four and sweating his ass off in a red polo and crisp jeans, the stiflingly hot July sun beating down on him as he scans the perimeter of a crowded playground for a familiar head of curly brown hair – not his nine-year-old. He found Rosalind already, wreaking havoc on the jungle gym. No, he’s looking for his ex (-husband, technically, but Steve usually stops at ex; the -husband part just makes him sad these days).
It’s custody swap day, which is either his favorite or least favorite day of the week depending on who the swap is favoring.
Today it’s favoring him which is why he’s slowly making his way around the edge of a playground in Bushwick, keeping an eye out for his ex, Eddie.
“Steve,” he hears from somewhere behind him. Steve turns towards the sound and sees not that curly head of hair he’d expected. Eddie’s hair is completely buzzed (which, for the record, was not the case last week when Steve dropped Rozzy off with him) and he’s wearing a paint-splattered white t-shirt tucked into old jeans and all that combined is making it reeeally hard for Steve to pretend he’s not crushing hard on the guy he divorced eight years ago.
“Dude,” Steve started, eyeing Eddie’s hair (or lack thereof) as he made his way to the section of fence that Eddie was occupying, “What–”
“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie rolled his eyes, “Rozzy already hit me with all the good zingers so you’re too late.”
“No, I don’t –” Steve stopped, “It’s…not a bad look, just…you know. Why the change?”
Eddie looked away.
“Long story,” he replied as Steve remembered (yet again) that he doesn’t get full access to Eddie’s world the way he used to.
Luckily for Steve, Rozzy runs up to them and spares him from having to figure out a response for that.
“We should get pizza,” she says. Steve’s eyebrows fly up.
“We should get pizza?” he repeats.
“Please,” she adds, her eyes shining, “At Dad’s? And we play Mario Kart? Dad said I’m getting good at 200!”
“He said that?” Steve asked, and he glances over Rosalind's head to see that Eddie is making a so-so gesture with his hand.
He’s never been all that good at saying no to his daughter (or anyone), so it doesn’t take much more convincing on Rozzy’s part for the three of them to head off in the direction of Eddie’s loft, with a pitstop planned for the pizza shop down the block.
They actually have a nice time.
It’s true that Rozzy is getting better at 200cc – good might be a bit generous, but Steve’s fine with that (he doesn’t know if his ego could handle getting crushed by a fourth-grader).
Just as they’re finishing their second grand prix (the Star Cup, because Rozzy likes the dolphin race), one of the other kids in the building knocks on the door and invites Rozzy over for a sleepover, which Steve agrees to because he remembers the illicit kind of joy in a summertime Monday night sleepover.
Eddie doesn't show Steve the door after Rozzy's gone. Rather, he pulls a bottle of wine from the fridge – an expensive Sémillon he says was given to him by a client.
“So the art biz is still going well, I assume,” Steve comments as Eddie pulls two vintage wine glasses out of a cabinet and pours them each a healthy serving.
Conversation about work manages to sustain them through the first few glasses (Eddie actually remembered that it’s been just over a year since Steve left his dad’s Fortune 1000 for a CFO position at a marketing company that had just graduated from small to midsize status). They work through the second quarter of the bottle talking about Rozzy, and the third vanishes even quicker while Steve spills some of the latest Harrington family drama.
While Eddie is updating him on how Wayne is doing, Steve finds that he isn’t really listening, distracted in the way he can’t help but notice how Eddie’s paint-stained t-shirt is actually more like an undershirt, and a size too small for him, the torso and sleeves tight around lean muscle, and there’s a thin silver chain around his neck and a scruff of facial hair around his jaw, and –
Steve doesn’t immediately realize when Eddie stopped talking. When he does, when his eyes finally unstick themselves from the buzzcut and drop back down to Eddie’s, he sees that Eddie is staring at him too.
Eddie’s tongue darts out to wet his lip.
“Ask me again why I buzzed my hair,” he tells him.
“Why’d you buzz your hair,” Steve asks, because he’s obedient like that (and because he really does want to know).
“Steve–” Eddie stops, a giggly, wine-induced hiccup of a laugh slipping out before he shakes his head, “An entire can of paint tipped ov–” He cuts himself off with another half-hysterical laugh, barely managing to say, “Spilled on my head,” before he was completely doubled over, and Steve is laughing too because he can totally picture it and because he had a bit more wine than he planned to and this is honestly the first time that he and Eddie have hung out without their daughter in…Steve doesn’t even know how long.
“Steve,” Eddie says again when they finally both recover, and his tone is completely different this time around and there’s a vulnerability in his eyes that wasn’t there before and something is happening, something is happening, “Please don’t kill me for saying this, but…fuck, it’s really kinda pathetic how badly I still want it to be you and me.”
Steve thinks he tries to respond, but then he was too busy kissing Eddie to do anything else, too busy scraping fingernails over Eddie’s scalp, too busy choking back a moan as Eddie sucks his bottom lip into his mouth, too busy tugging Eddie’s shirt out of his waistband to shove a hand up underneath and finding that he’s built more solidly than Steve remembers from the last time they touched like this, but something is telling him that’s true about Eddie – true about himself too – in more ways than one.
And if Rosalind comes home the next morning ready to ask how she’s getting back to Daddy’s house only to find that he’s already there, stealing Dad’s mug out of his hand for a sip of coffee when his own is right there…that’s a conversation for another day.
part 2
#i have SO MANY Feelings about this#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie week 2024#literally incapable of writing them as anything other than girl-dads srry
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DPxDC snippet/prompt:
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“John.”
Zantanna’s voice had that cadence to it. Faintly strangled. Forcibly calm. Her rising blood pressure and rapidly approaching limit for his special brand of excitement evident in every single letter of his name.
Felt like old times.
“Z.” He said, smoke curling out of his mouth and billowing towards the dreary grey sky above. The one nice thing about Gotham, it had the same gloomy dark ambience of ol’ London town. “Long time no see. How’s show biz been treating you?”
He saw the faintest of twitches at the corner of her eye. Could almost hear her counting to ten in her head. He smiled at her winningly, leaning back against the damp bricks of the alleyway as he waited. More smoke drifted upward from beside him in time with a bored sigh. Patience was running out on all sides it seemed.
“That’s a child.”
“Sharp as ever.” He said, taking another drag. He nudged the child in question beside him gently with his elbow, glancing down with a sly grin. “See this is why the Justice League pay her the big bucks. Nothing gets past our Zantanna Zatara.”
He got a cloud of smoke blown directly in his face for that, little shit.
“John.”
“Z.”
“Why do you have a child? Why is the child smoking?”
“Long story.” He said with a wave of his hand.
“I learned it from watching him.” The kid said, with the same cadence as that old American commercial. All dramatic and overwrought emotion. The gremlin swooned against John's side in an imitation of collapse, hand holding the lit bifter coming up to their forhead to really sell the melodrama. He nudged his ghostly companion off, grinning at Zantanna’s slipping patience as he did.
“Don’t worry about it. Kid's fine.”
“A child wandering around with you in a dark ally in Gotham smoking cigarettes is fine?”
“I mean, I’m already dead. And short. It’s not like smoking is gonna be able to do any worse to me.”
#dpxdc#dpxdc prompt#john constantine#zantanna zatara#dani phantom#danielle phantom#elle phantom#danny fenton#i wrote this with Elle in mind since I have an entire Paper Moon AU brewing in my head with her & John#but it absolutely could be danny instead#zantanna is already so done with all of this#she's having flashbacks of John smoking in the corner with baby Jason Todd when the kid was still Robin and Bruce losing his shit about it#she wants to say not her circus not her monkeys *so badly*#but very unfortunately John and his bullshit probably is her deranged little monkey in her very on fire circus#and now he's got a feral dead kid following him around this can't be good
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exactly one person asked and i’ve been DYING to make this, so here are all of my favorite long batman fanfics in general and for new readers @twisted-tales-told :)
cards on the table by @wesslan ! 69k, completed. this is one of my all time favorite fanfictions, it’s so funny and tim is a mastermind genius and a little liar <3 he basically pretends to be a fortune teller and gives scarily good predictions and advice by stalking the upper class and eventually gets involved with the batfam and has to maintain his lies while dealing with his issues :) 10/10, very found family, good angst, so much lying
Dark Matter by @mysterycyclone , 221k, ongoing. this is a batman fanfic rec, of course my bbg dark matter is going to be here <3 this is a MCUxDCU crossover where after infinity war (spoilers for that if you haven’t seen it!) peter parker gets sent to the DCU dimension with part of the soul stone and basically is haunted by the ghosts of the avengers while trying to survive in gotham and get back to his dimension. this is so well written i’ve read it at least three times, it’s still ongoing but trust me it is SO GOOD. i can’t properly describe it, but if you like spider-man and you are interested in batman, you’ll love.
Red is the Color of Sinners by @bluelotuswrites , series, 120k, ongoing, M. i want you to look me in my eyes when i tell you this is my favorite series on ao3. it is set after under the red hood and daredevil 3 where jason and matt meet in a church after jason loses his ability to speak following the events of UTRH. they keep running into each other both as matt and daredevil and eventually jason begins helping matt out with injuries and tech. it’s not finished yet, but there is something so compelling about their dynamic in this series as well as jason’s overall character and how he is portrayed. i’m a sucker for mute jason after UTRH and this series does so well giving him a fresh start and a place away from gotham to heal and build relationships. i cannot recommend enough.
buy back the secrets by @vinelark , 71k, ongoing, T. THIS!!! oh my god, so this is a timkon fic where kon still doesn’t know tim’s civilian identity, but whenever he’s in trouble tim calls for superboy which leads to them meeting without kon knowing. shenanigans ensure when kon starts spending more time with tim! it’s still ongoing but the author is currently working on the next part and it is so so worth the wait. chapter 4 ends on a cliffhanger though so be warned :))
Sales People Know (listening is the most important part) by Mayhem10, 77k, completed, T. this has the coolest urban magical realism ever. tim basically runs this magic shop that shows up places and people who need something find it in his shop :) it’s kinda a slow burn found family fic with magic themes and a smidge of angst!
Retrograde Motion by Lysical, 112k, completed, T. this is best de-aged kid fic ever. jason gets turned into a 7 year old and basically the outlaws, artemis and biz, join forces with the batfam to take care of him. but trust me when i say this is worth your time, it might sound tropey but in the best way possible!! and jason’s relationship with artemis is sooo important to me in this!
Hand in Unloveable Hand (a chokehold) by britishparty, 54k, completed, M. this is one of the best psychological torture/grooming fics i’ve ever read. pretty much what if while our taking photos of batman and robin, little tim gets kidnapped and black mask gets his hands on him and decides he’s the perfect size for a protege. years of psychological abuse and insane mind games ensue. also tim is a Badass™️
If He Had Come by bronwe_iris, 45k, completed, T. so i’m a little freak and i love the angst of arkham knight jason, but more specifically the aus where bruce saves jason before he becomes the arkham knight! this is an au where bruce finds jason and saves him from the joker after 9 months of torture and brings him home. focuses on his healing mentally and physically and rebuilding his relationship with his family
Banshee in a Well by liverobinreaction (bugbee), 43k, completed, T. veeeery good angst. basically what if tim couldn’t die? 43k of tim drake whump where he just dies a bajillion times and eventually his family notices <3
The Birds: Hatching a Family by Oceanera12, 81k, completed, T. this is like “what if the batkids weren’t adopted by bruce, but instead they were all foster siblings who can’t seem to stay out of gotham at night and batman happens to find them and decides obviously he can’t leave these kids to their own business, he has to stick his nose in it” and there’s some angst and heaps of found family
The Hellblazer’s Apprentice by @bluelotuswrites, 29k, ongoing, M. what can i say, im a simple woman, i love to see jason with literally any older male mentor :) basically in UTRH what if he took up an apprenticeship under constantine to learn magic to piss off batman! so good, i really love constantine so seeing him and jason interact in a long fic is so good. also ALL BLADES JASON TODD SAVE ME… ALL BLADES JASON TODD-
something in the static by bonerot19, 101k, ongoing series with three main completed works, T. this is a jason centric series where jason still lives in crime alley with his mom and dad and never stole the batmobile tires. it follows his life in crime alley with an addict mom and an abusive dad and one night when his dad is whaling on him nightwing finds him and the bats just can’t seem to leave him alone after that. steph is his neighbor and best friend also and their relationship is so good. this is a “what if jason took a different way home to the wayne’s” fic series and i love it so much <3
catch the asteroids that come your way by ThePackWantsTheD, 54k, completed, T. i don’t read a lot of ships in the batman fandom i’m sorry, but this kyle/jason one is sooo lovely. basically the two of them growing up together and falling in love and then dealing with the aftermath of A Death in the Family and finding each other again :) really sweet and nice!
hope you find something you like! i realized the majority of these are tim or jason centric, and i love them all dearly, but if anyone has any recs for long fics focusing on any of the other batkids lmk! and any other recs in general, i am a fiend for new fics
#batman fanfiction recommendation#batfam fic rec#batman fic rec#fic: cards on the table#fic: dark matter#fic: red is the color of sinners#fic: buy back the secrets#fic:salespeople know (listening is the most important part)#fic: retrograde motion#fic: hand in unloveable hand (a chokehold)#fic: if he had come#fic: banshee in a well#fic: the hellblazers apprentice#fic: the birds: hatching a family#fic: something in the static#fic: seventeen going under#fic: catch the asteroids that come your way#timkon#jaykyle#timkon fic rec#batman#batfam#jason todd#tim drake#dick grayson#damian wayne#bruce wayne#stephanie brown#duke thomas#cassandra cain
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"It's so unfair to the Rat Grinders that they are killed instantly and the Bad Kids get to roll death saves." SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUP
THIS IS LONG, AND HONESTLY FOR MYSELF, SO YEAH READ IF YOU WANT
I swear to god, this discourse is going to fucking be the end of me. Idk what kind of mind boggling spell Brennan Lee Mulligan wove into the fabric of the universe that spread through the data center of Dropout in order to absolutely hijack y'all's brains when it comes to Cocklord Assgape and her ragtag of character foils but whatever it was has made you Rat Grinder stans INSUFFERABLE in this site.
The levels of treating fictional characters as if they were real people have reached a level I honestly have never anticipated, to the point of y'all actually being mad AT THE CAST for "mistreating" them and ACTUALLY QUESTION BRENNAN'S CAPACITY TO DM. Do you not get how fucking insane that is?
We can't make fun of Copperkettle, one of the most pathetic, petty and incompetent villains in D20 history anymore (even though she is masterfully written and developed to generate this reaction from us) anymore because it's bullying apparently. I saw an account flip the fuck out because someone compared her rivalry with Kristen to Drake and Kendrick's beef. KIPPERLILY IS NOT A REAL GIRL. SHE IS A MAKE BELIEVE CHARACTER IN AN IMPROV SHOW SPAWNED FROM THE BRAIN OF A 36 YEAR OLD MAN
And then what truly pissed me off the MOST about this whole hell is the fact that, being chronically online avid consumers of this goddamn show, I would think you would have but a grasp of the main cast of characters' characterization.
Why the uproar about Riz saying they should chop Oisin's head off? The same Riz who tortured that pixie from Freshman year by shooting off their finger one by one? The same Riz who murked a disarmed and unconscious Coach Daybreak without battin an eye? The same Riz who ATE THE CORPSE OF KALVAXUS?
And the whole Fabian vs Ivy debacle MY GOD, THE GIRL WAS RACIST TO HIS GIRLFRIEND AND USED HER LAST BREATH TO CALL MAZEY "OBJECTIVELY UGLY". And the funniest thing is that is not even the most unhinged shit he has ever said.
And finally, Death Save Gate: THE RAT GRINDERS ARE NOT PLAYER CHARACTERS. THEY ARE NPCS! THE RULES FOR EACH WORK DIFFERENTLY, ESPECIALLY THEM BEING BOSS ENCOUNTERS. Imagine having to still hit Ivy or Oisin 2 more times to kill them when there is 14 foot tall Porter throwing legendary actions left and right, with Jace, and other 3 spell casters + Mary Ann and KLCK up and running. It's called balancing the fucking game. Also, game masters are entitled to break, mold and make up any rules they want if they find necessary in order to service themselves and their players. IF YOU PLAY WITH ALL THESE RULES AS THEY COME, GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR TABLE. THIS IS NOT YOUR TABLE.
Not only is Brennan DMing for his CLOSEST FRIENDS EVER, he is also shooting and producing an ENTIRE TV SHOW. So yeah, i think he knows wtf he is doing.
"But the Ratgrinders had no real development": True. But it wasn't for lack of trying from the players. Everytime they tried to know more, the dice didn't let them, so they decided to focus on the mystery. It simply do be like that sometimes.
"But they are just kids!": And so were Penelope, Dayne, Ragh, Zayn, the Bloodrush Players, Aelwyn and Biz. Why wasn't it a problem then? Because most of them were evil to some extent and were about to bring the fucking apocalypse to the world? Yeah, sounds familiar right? And the ones who were manipulated or had any sort of redemption worked their way into earning it, right? Yeah.
In conclusion, I fucking love the Rat Grinders, I truly do, and not unlike 90% of this website, i'm still holding on to hope that they have any sort of development and redemption in the last episode, because I agree, they ARE children and they WERE manipulated by Porter and Jace, but like, can we also agree that they are fucking assholes and had it fucking coming? Also, the BKs are children too y'know. SO STOP BEING FUCKING ANNOYING.
#brennan lee mulligan#dimension20#dimension 20#fantasy high#d20 fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fantasy high spoilers#rat grinders#d20 fhjy#d20#dimension 20 fantasy high#kipperlilly copperkettle#ivy embra#oisin hakinvar#dimension20 spoilers#ruben hopclap#mary ann skuttle#konic0 rant
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I don’t know if this will be ✨ controversial ✨ in anyway but I got some stuff to say about g13
Namely about the incel and evil stuff I’ve seen said
Let’s be real, he’s not either of those things
I get the cast and stuff have been calling him an incel just cause he’s greasy and good with computers but I’ve seen people comparing him to biz glitterdew from FH and quite frankly g13 is just an asshole and he’s definitely no where near as bad or gross as biz was
And sure I can see an argument for evil like “ohh he was hacking Usha” and “he’s was taking her over ohh how terrible and evil of him” but like
It’s his body? Personally I feel he kinda has a right to try to take it back after being forcibly shunted out so an old woman could take it over?
I mean if you had been living your life, it’s fake but you think it’s real and someone you refuse to acknowledge you care about is in danger and suddenly and without warning your removed from your body and an ancient woman fills it and immediately starts fucking stuff up for you
And I know I’m not touching on the whole “I want people” thing but I’m to tired when typing this and also this is a comedy show so like nothing actually matters lol this is literally just my two cents on the matter so take it all with a grain of salt
#personally I love g13 and think he’s so cool#unfortunately he is from the comedy absolute chaos season where the dm is making the craziest decisions of all the people at the table#dimension 20#d20#never stop blowing up#d20 never stop blowing up#nsbu#nsbu g13#g13
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