#okay i met someone on hinge

[mysticvenus]

💀

[noiriarti]

The Winner Takes it All: Anakin Skywalker x Reader (Enemies-to-Lovers Modern AU) | Chapter 2

NSFW! Minors DNI!!! Summary: The moment the thesis competition was announced, you knew your biggest threat. Anakin Skywalker, golden boy of the engineering department. He's the only other person smart enough to beat you, and the only other person insane enough to stay in the lab until midnight every night. He's also an asshole, but you're starting to think maybe he's not as bad as you thought he was... Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x Fem!Reader CW: mentions of masturbation WC: 6.9k AN: hehehehehe this chapter was so much fun to write and i fear i have added a bit of a plot to this pwp fic. next chapter will get even wilder! as always, asks and requests open <3

Ch. 1, [Ch. 2], Ch. 3, Ch. 4, Ch. 5, Ch. 6

Chapter 2: Testing

Anakin stumbled to his room on unsteady feet. When he entered, it was 1:43 am, but he had never felt more awake. He couldn't have slept even if he had wanted to, because you were haunting him. The wood of his door as he unlocked it felt like the lab bench under his fingers. His lips felt phantom kisses from you. Your angry voice echoed in the creak of the hinges. His pillows were soft like your clothes, like your skin.

The more he thought about it, the harder he got, which he wasn't sure was possible, really. His cock was pressing against his jeans so hard that he was relatively certain he could get off just by thrusting into the material a few times. Anakin rocked his hips experimentally against the rough material, and a shiver of pleasure ran down his spine. Jesus. He was definitely sensitive enough to cum like that. But he shouldn't. He really, really shouldn't. It would be weird and creepy, when you told him you didn't want to do more of this. He shouldn't. He resolved to sleep it off, but found sleep was still evading him about an hour later when he lay awake in bed. Fuck my life. Fine. If he was going to be up, he might as well get some work done. So, he spent the night typing at his desk, which he distinctly had to try not to imagine kissing you against.

Anakin didn't hate you. Far from it. Okay, maybe not that far from it. But if he hated you, he something-else-ed you with equal measure. He just wasn't sure what that something else was. Did he like you? This wasn't like any crush he had before. You were so rude sometimes, but he would snap right back, and then escalate. Anakin didn't love that personality trait in himself, but it came out in spades around you. In freshman year, your name on the posted top homework of the week was exhilarating. Finally, some competition. Someone who loved engineering as much as he did. Someone who understood the fire that got him out of his backwater town and into the world. Then he met you, and that exhilaration turned a thousand times stronger. You weren't just a peer, you were a challenge. Every jab you threw at him, every time your bot would beat his in the traditional end-of-year tournament, he'd feel like he was suddenly on fire, electricity shocking through his very being. It was the same feeling he chased in taekwondo, that edge where he wasn't sure if he'd win, but he was so, so close. It was easier to interpret it as anger, as hatred, as fuel.

Even though he thought you could be a know-it-all, he had to admit that he always had a sort of begrudging respect toward you. You worked on a group project together, three times, once per year on average, and he could consistently rely on the fact that you'd never be a slacker. Others on the team would sometimes ghost, which annoyed you both in equal measure. The two of you would butt heads over what to do in the projects, but you were always 100% dedicated. He respected it about you, even if you were critical of his admittedly shoddy handwriting or the logical jumps in his proofs.

By senior year, he was unknowingly nursing what could affectionately be called a crush, though it was masked under layers and layers of frustration and competition and anger. Anakin wasn't very self aware, but it was beginning to dawn on even him that, perhaps, he liked you. There were several signs. Late nights in the lab were torture for him. He'd sit there, trying to focus on something, anything, but he kept seeing that piece of hair that fell into your face when you bent over your bench and your deft hands wiring capacitors. Sometimes, when you passed him and he caught a whiff of your smell, his heart would speed up. When he heard your voice in class, he would start smiling. It was honestly kind of embarrassing.

In retrospect, it was surprising he hadn't broken and kissed you earlier. But, now that he had, all he could think about was kissing you again. As he sat at his desk thinking, the next steps for his thesis slipped through his hands like grains of sand. At practice the next afternoon, his technique was sloppy, which his teammates riffed on endlessly. In class, the professor could have said the secret to traveling faster than light, and it would have gone in one of Anakin's ears and out the other.

You had said it couldn't happen. Why? Did he do something wrong? At the time, he was clouded with arousal, joy, and exhilaration, so he didn't ask any questions, just agreed mindlessly, but your statement was haunting him. We shouldn't do this again. Why not? His body was screaming for it, at the very least, and so was his heart, but he chose to ignore that.

Anakin was pondering this issue over a piece of tech for the Jinn lab, where he worked part-time during the semester, when Obi-Wan walked in and headed straight for him. Though Obi-Wan was technically his supervisor, being a third-year graduate student advised by Professor Jinn, Anakin considered him a friend. Though he was usually pretty serious, Obi-Wan appeared thoroughly amused today and looked a bit like the cat who got the cream.

"Anakin," Obi-Wan said by way of greeting as he passed by his chair.

"What's up?" Anakin asked as he tried to get a particularly annoying screw tightened.

"Were you in the thesis lab last night?" Yes, he was, in fact. He was making out with you, but he didn't need to mention that.

"Yeah, working on some hardware for my next prototype, why?" Obi-Wan's smile spread further, if possible.

"Did you know there's cameras?" The blood froze in Anakin's veins. The suggestion in his voice was unmistakable.

"What?" His voice came out like a whisper.

"Good thing you were simply working on your prototype. You should warn other students to take… dalliances elsewhere," Obi-Wan said, winking.

"I-um-fuck--I." The words died on Anakin's tongue. Holy fucking shit. "I didn't see cameras."

"They're small. Qui-Gon had me install them this year. Nevertheless, things happen," Obi-Wan said, pausing, then quickly added, "Good luck." Obi-Wan patted Anakin on the shoulder and walked into his office in the back of the lab, leaving Anakin frozen in his chair.

Later that evening, once he'd worked (read: sat in shock) for four hours at the Jinn lab, finished two assignments for his gened, and led a practice for the TKD team, Anakin dragged his tired ass to the thesis lab. He was still restless since Obi-Wan's revelation. There was a video of the two of you, and he found himself wondering more than a few times if he could get it. For safekeeping, of course. No other reason.

He nodded at Barriss, who was on her way out, on complete autopilot. Seems she's getting in gear for the competition, he would have thought had he been mentally present in the slightest. He was the only one in the lab, a relief considering the fact that all his brain cells tended to leave the building as soon as you were near him, so he could get some work done. Get some tests in, make some actual progress. Maybe he could even pull a win on the competition, if not just an A on his thesis. He'd written some code during thermo lecture that he loaded onto an Arduino, turning over the device and its sharp pins in his fingers before disconnecting it from his laptop and shoving it into a breadboard. It looked ugly, clunky, and inelegant, but it was just a temporary setup for the test run before he attached the Arduino to the current motherboard. Sometime midway through the code running, the door to the lab clacked open.

It was you. Who else would arrive to the lab at 8pm? You looked gorgeous today, which hit Anakin like a punch to the gut. Cool, cool. This was normal. He could handle this. The cold had darkened your lips and cheeks a bit, so subtle he wouldn't have noticed if he wasn't staring. But he was, and he looked away quickly, back to his computer, and choked out a "hey." Anakin heard the tell-tale smack of your backpack on the floor, then each layer you shed (thump for coat, gentle taps for gloves, barely a thunk for hat). His eyes were fixed intently on the screen, even though there was nothing to look at there. When he looked up, you were right in front of him, close enough to touch.

"Hi," you said. Your eyes were gazing up at him earnestly and he could almost see his reflection in them. Fuck. You were standing incredibly near him, much closer than anyone else in his life would.

"Hi," he breathed. Was this it? Were you going to tell him that, actually, you wanted him? That maybe you could go on a date, or, at least go back to your place? Just going back to yours for sex wouldn't be exactly what he wanted, but then again beggars can't be choosers. And he was definitely a beggar right now.

"I need the small pliers." You reached out your hand expectantly. Oh. Okay.

"Yep." He handed them over, then watched as you walked back to your table.

Awesome. So Anakin was still horrendously awkward around you. He knew how to speak to you after the past several years, where he'd found himself getting little kernels of knowledge about your life and thoughts. It was more that he didn't know what he could say that wasn't a confession that he really really wanted to kiss you again.

The dark had already fallen outside hours ago when you began to put away your prototype. All of the world was asleep, the hallway outside the makerspace dark. The only light outside the lab were the streetlights glowing through the open windows, casting shadows over the sidewalk. Time was fictional in those moments, stretching and shortening and contorting until a minute passed in what felt like an hour, or the other way around. Nothing made sense in those moments. His calculations. The unease he felt. Least of all, why you didn't want to kiss him again. Why he didn't just tell you that he couldn't stop thinking about you. But you were already putting your coat on, slinging your backpack over your shoulder, and--

"Wait," he called out desperately, gesturing with his hand toward you. He fell silent. What was he going to say? He'd ask you to talk, to explain that he actually really enjoyed yesterday and that he'd really really like to do it again. He'd tell you that he didn't hate you, actually. That he'd actually enjoy going on a date, maybe to dinner or a movie, he wasn't picky. The words were on the tip of his tongue.

"Can you just stay for five more minutes while I use the drill press?" Close enough.

You looked at him and simply nodded. You kept an eye on him while he used the drill press, and his hand almost slipped three times under your scrutiny. But then he was done, and you both went through the paces of closing up the room. Vents off, machines off, check printers, check laser cutters, lights off, leave.

On the walk home, Anakin looked up and saw an empty sky, so different from the one on the farm at home. No matter where he turned there, he saw constellations and different worlds. Here, between the tall buildings and under all the light pollution, it was just black. You walked home wordlessly again.

The next day, he was determined to be more normal, and immediately asked you how your project was going. He could tell you were guarded based on the wariness in your eye, but you still answered. That you were dealing with a test not working. He offered to take a look at it, but you shot him down.

Later, you asked him if he knew how to deal with an issue with your CAD model, which he did, and he helped you extrude text on the curved surface. Anakin tried not to notice how close your body was.

The normalcy returned within three hours between the two of you. Sure, there was an elephant in the room (or, really, a herd of elephants), but you two were getting comfortable again, casually chatting about class and boasting about your projects. You revealed the thermo midterm hadn't gone so well, and he confessed that it hadn't for him, either. He was very worried about the class, actually, but the thesis was his priority. When he told you, Anakin couldn't figure out what your expression meant. Surprise? Anger? Sadness? Sympathy? He shrugged it off. Probably was a shock to realize he wasn't always perfect.

An hour later, he was thinking about going home, but then he saw you staring at your computer with your headphones in.

"Whatcha watching?" He hoped the question sounded casual. You paused the video and looked up at him.

"An old Criminal Minds episode," you responded with a hint of a smile. His heart leaped.

"Can I join? I'm waiting on a print, and I need a break anyway." Was that smooth? He couldn't tell. You nodded, and he pulled up a chair. He was endlessly thankful you were using wired earbuds today (you had explained you'd forgotten your usual wireless ones at home), so that he had an excuse to sit near you. It was just how far the cord reached, not how badly he wanted to press himself against you. That was all.

"Oh, it's totally the teacher," he remarked at one point, midway through the episode. Your legs had gotten closer, almost pressing the sides of his thigh to yours. That did not make his heart race. It was probably the tension in the episode.

"Obviously, dumbass," you chided, smacking your leg into his, but there wasn't any bite to it. It was affection, and he reveled in it the whole way home.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Ahsoka Tano wasn't stupid. She had eyes and a capability for critical thought that she thought two particular people in her life lacked. When her roommate came home from the lab one day in mid-November, dead silent with hair mussed and lips still swollen from making out with someone, Ahsoka knew something had happened between you and the only other person who would be in the lab that late. Finally. But there was a clench in your jaw, a hard set in your eyes, that told her it wasn't all positive. But it was progress.

The first time she met met Anakin was when she was a freshman and joined the Coruscant U taekwondo team. She'd seen him around the competitive taekwondo circuit, of course; he was national champion two times running in the 16-18 division. Anakin was precise, vicious, and powerful. By the time he was a freshman, he was about to reach the fourth Dan, a feat which took most people years. He was just that good.

When Ahsoka met him, she was certain he'd be the kind of arrogant that could only come with prodigy status. And, though he was a bit full of himself, she was surprised to find him to be kind. Not nice, necessarily, all quips and snipes and sarcasm, but definitely kind to the younger students, and to her. When he asked her to be his vice-captain, she said yes immediately. There was no one better she could learn from.

The first time she noticed the tension between you was at the first competition she was in, when you came to watch her. At some point, Anakin's name had been announced, and you looked like you'd smelled curdled milk. When she asked you about it later, she hadn't expected the total word vomit that spilled out of you about how annoying and horrible and infuriating Anakin was in class. Your actual issues with him were fairly minor, she thought: 1. He gloated (definitely true), 2. He sabotaged other people's projects so he'd do better (probably not true), 3. He was always getting praise from the professors (probably true), and 4. He always assumed you didn't know what you were doing (probably true).

But Ahsoka saw a side of him you didn't. At a competition in her sophomore year, in the dead of night at the Airbnb the team had rented, she saw him frantically sewing his expensive competitive dobok, heavy with embroidery befitting his dan, when one of the seams tore mid-match the day before. It took some digging, but he confessed that he didn't have a backup. He couldn't afford a new one right now. Anakin didn't talk about home much, and, when he did, it was in clipped sentences saying that yes, he had a mom and a new stepdad. Yes, he was from a small town. As vice-captain, she had access to the list of students who the team was sponsoring at competitions because they needed the financial aid. Anakin was on the list every time. Ahsoka didn't mention it to him, ever.

Over the past three years, she had watched the spark between the two of you ignite into fights and frustration. She'd heard Anakin ask about you in a way he thought was subtle, but was actually glaringly obvious. She'd heard you complain that he was so annoying enough times. Now that something had actually happened between you, that was it. She was going to do something about it.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"A taekwondo party?" You had asked.

"Yeah! At Rex's," Ahsoka had said. To be honest, you kind of needed a break. Or, at least a night to not think about circuits. You were beginning to see that Anakin was smart, even smarter than you had thought, and it was creeping up on you that, maybe, just maybe, you wouldn't win no matter what you did. Maybe he was just too brilliant. You wanted to forget that, and getting drunk seemed like a great way to do just that. "Anakin will be there," Ahsoka's voice echoed in your head. Why did she say that? The peace you had settled into with Anakin was tenuous, but there. Did she know about what happened between the two of you?

You still weren't sure when you arrived on the door of the brownstone. Tau Kappa Delta wasn't an actual frat, but it was a house full of the TKD team competitors who called each other "brothers," so the nickname stuck. It was a bit out of the way of campus, but it was the prime place to hold parties if you wanted to get raunchy in a safe place. You and Ahsoka had gotten dressed up, you in some kind of short black silk dress she shoved in your hands, and her in a strappy ensemble that looked a bit like battle armor. There were straps around the arms that extended into fingerless gloves and some kind of tactical belt was slung low over her hips. Her halter top showed off her strong arms, and, for an instant, you wished you played sports for the university. How she wasn't shivering in the cold air, you'd never know.

The door swung open and the warmth indoors hit you, thick with bodies and sweat and beer, and some guy ushered you in while Ahsoka gave him a hug. This must be one of the team members you had met, some sturdy guy with an accent. You couldn't quite place if his name was Cody or Vaughn, but it was one of them, you thought. The room you entered was full of coats and bags, as well as a few people standing and chatting with drinks in their hands. Through the doorway, music blared in what was probably the living room. You couldn't make out any furniture through the dancing crowd.

Ahsoka reappeared with a shot in each hand, offering one to you with a wink.

"To a good night where you can relax, because God knows you need it," she toasted, bumping her shot glass against yours and downing it in one go. The tequila burned as it went down your throat. You coughed for a bit, then asked her for another. Might as well get the party started right. Another shot went into you, and then Ahsoka dragged you to the dance floor. The lights in the room were flashing all kinds of colors--red, purple, blue--and the music was loud enough that you could feel it vibrating through your organs. Ahsoka pushed her way past some people, closer to the center of the room, and then found enough space for the two of you and started dancing. The rhythm flowed through you, and you were just drunk enough not to care if you looked stupid. It was perfect. The two of you danced for three, maybe four songs, before Ahsoka went to get you both another shot, and then another. Some of Ahsoka's friends had joined you, not that you knew them, but you were in your own world, having fun. People bumped into your shoulder, leg, elbow, whatever, but you were on cloud nine. The bass felt like one heartbeat connecting all of the strangers on the floor to you, like you were all one beast. Dancing with your friends like this, going to parties, that's all that you cared about. This would be one of those memories you treasured, you were sure of it.

And then you saw Anakin. Much to your annoyance, he looked particularly good that day, his hair still as touchable as it was every day in the lab. He was wearing light-wash jeans (like that night, a small part of your brain reminded you) and a black, comfortable t-shirt. Oh, and there was a woman with him. Like that wasn't the first thing you noticed. She was shorter than him by a good bit, standing in front of him so you couldn't see her face, just her annoyingly shiny chestnut hair and perfect neck. Cool. Fine. They were in the corner of the room, with him leaning against the wall and her standing in front of him, shouting conversation over the loud music. Anakin shot her a warm smile, the one he rarely turned toward you, and then she put her hand on his chest. It was the alcohol that flipped your stomach, you were sure of it. And anger at seeing him, nothing else. You tapped Ahsoka and got close to her ear.

"Who's that?" You asked. She turned closer to you, her eyebrows drawn.

"Huh?" She half-yelled back. You lent in closer, trying to get to her ear.

"The girl?" You could barely hear yourself over the noise.

"What?" Oh, fuck it. You full-on yelled, but it didn't even come close to the level of bass in the room.

"Who's the girl with Anakin?"

"Oh," Ahsoka yelled back. "That's his ex." Awesome. Whoop-de-fucking-do. There was, objectively, no reason why that should have annoyed you. But it did. The girl waved to Anakin, then left, leaving him looking incredibly hot up against that wall. Your eyes took in the width of his chest, the muscles and veins in his arms. And then he was looking at you.

He had caught you. Fuck. He gave you a little wave with a smirk, then left into the next room. Shitfuckmotherfucker. Ahsoka grabbed your shoulder, shouting something about how the two of you should get some air. You nodded and let her pull you out of the dance floor, then to a room down the hall, where you could hear voices talking, laughing.

You recognized a few of the people. Jesse, Echo, the one whose name you'd ascertained was actually Cody, Fives, and Fox were all there, and, of course, so was Anakin. They were sitting in an uneven, horrible circle that was really more of a convex shape around the couch. Some girls you'd seen before around campus but you hadn't really met and some other team members were strewn about the room, sipping beers from their red cups. Anakin greeted you both with a wave.

"Hey, come join us, we're playing truth or dare," he yelled across the room. Ahsoka grinned and almost pulled you down with her to the floor.

"C'mon, let's play," she said as she grinned up at you. Truth or dare and other party games had never really been your thing, and you kind of were feeling the number of shots you had taken, so you decided you were out.

"Oh, I'm not sure--" you started.

"What, gonna chicken out?" Anakin's voice called. That motherfucker.

"Never," you shot back, plopping your ass down. You weren't sure there was a way to win truth or dare, but you were going to find it, goddamn it.

"Okay, Rex. Truth or dare?" Jesse started. You'd only met him once, but he had a nice voice and a glint in his eye that made you like him immediately.

"Dare," he responded gruffly. Some oohs peppered the room as they watched their intrepid assistant captain about to get loose. Jesse thought for a moment.

"Take two shots!" The crowd chanted as Rex sighed, poured himself two shots of tequila, and downed them with only a small wince. After he was done, it was his turn.

"Ahsoka, truth or dare?"

"Truth?" Ahsoka crinkled her nose.

"Aw c'mon Snips. Bo-oring," Anakin teased. Ahsoka shot him a look that said if I weren't across this circle, I would smack you right now.

"Only 'cause y'all can't think of a better dare than drinking," she said. Chuckles bubbled through the room.

"Fine, then, have you ever kissed Lux Bonteri?" Rex's question apparently hit the nail on the head as all the color drained out of Ahsoka's face.

"I changed my mind. Dare." Ahsoka's eyes were wide, and you knew why. She and Lux had kind of had a thing going, but he was on another school's team. She'd come back home after matches with stories about what he said, asking if you thought it was romantic or platonic. But she'd never admit to doing anything with a member of their fiercest competition. Rex rolled his eyes as people booed, Anakin especially loudly.

"Fine, fine. I dare you to… call your ex," Rex conceded. That was easy enough for Ahsoka, given that her only ex was Barriss, who she was still good friends with. Barriss had broken it off to focus on work over a year ago, and it had been hard on Ahsoka at first, but they got over it and were back to just being a little bit awkward. With an eye roll and a scoff, Ahsoka pulled out Barriss's contact and pressed the call button. The phone rang out on speaker, just getting Barriss's voicemail. "There, ya happy?" Ahsoka asked, then turned to someone else.

The game went around and around, questions about the last time someone had sex and dares to kiss someone else flying across the room as the team members who obviously knew each other too well publicly tortured one another. Eventually, someone said your name.

"Truth or dare?" It was Echo, who Ahsoka had told you was finally competing again after tearing his ACL. He had kind eyes, and the room seemed electric, so you made your choice without much thought.

"Uh, dare?" Echo smiled in a way that seemed apologetic, and you realized that perhaps this was a terrible idea. Was the room holding its breath, or was it just you?

"Okay, I dare you to straddle Anakin for three minutes." The room erupted, cheers and hollers coming from every player in the nearby vicinity. "Get it, Cap" came from somewhere on your right, and a whistle came from your left. Anakin looked white as a sheet, and you noticed he was staring at Echo with murder in his eyes. They'd pay for that in practice, most likely. He was leant back on his arms, legs criss-crossed, but the position suddenly looked tense. A muscle in his jaw bulged. The chants weren't stopping, and you decided to get it over with.

Whether it was the alcohol coursing through you or some newfound bravery, you weren't sure, but you started moving over to Anakin, who was three seats to your right, near a wall. He made eye contact with you, his gaze softening, and you could practically hear him asking you if you were okay with this. You were, you realized. It was probably the alcohol talking. The wolf whistles of the other players faded away, and sitting on his lap suddenly became the only thing you wanted.

You hitched one leg across Anakin's body, then sank down so that you were sitting on him. The rough material of his jeans slid against your bare thighs, and you cursed your choice not to wear pants. Your stomach was pressed to his chest, and you noticed that, even though your cleavage was in his eyeline and you always thought he was easily swayed by tits and ass, his eyes were intently staring into yours. In your shadow and the dark light, they were blown wide, the black almost consuming his blue irises. A world away, someone yelled that they had started a timer.

Somewhere behind your back, Ahsoka slipped Echo five bucks. You wouldn't have noticed if she had done it in front of you, because you were too busy trying to slow the beating of your heart. Or was that his? You couldn't tell. Everything was a bit fuzzy. In this position, you were above him for the first time, looking down at those eyes that were casting you a look that churned something inside you. With that look, you were back in the lab, and he was telling you to jump up onto the table, and his hands were all over you. You'd lose yourself in that moment, if you could.

Anakin's eyes traveled down your figure with a hard gulp that bobbed his Adam's apple. His gaze lingered on your low-cut front, tracing over the seams, then reaching down to your thighs. In your drunken state, you hadn't noticed the amount of skin that was exposed when your dress rode up. He definitely did. You felt something slowly changing beneath you, and it took you a second to comprehend that he was getting hard. Because of you. You rationalized it as the reaction any person with a penis would have to being straddled like that. Right?

His heavy breathing seemed to confirm it, and Anakin mouthed 'sorry' when he felt himself press against you subtly. You distinctly did not mind. His eyes flicked down between your legs, where the skirt had ridden up so that one wrong--or right--move would let him see what was underneath it. Him seeing you didn't bother you one bit, actually. You kind of wanted him to put a hand to you, press his fingers inside you. Maybe he could take you upstairs to one of the rooms and fuck you furiously. Or maybe you could shove what you were feeling against your legs into your throat. Or maybe one, then the other.

His gaze met yours again before sliding down to your lips and staying there. The same energy that he had when he was one-upping you, confidently answering a question in class, or telling you to re-solder your work grew in his eyes. That intensity. That fierce desire for success. You found it incredibly attractive then, but now, it was irresistible.

The timer beeped, and you thought of the 3D printer that night in the lab. Cockblocks, the both of them. The others in the room cheered as you got off him instantly, then slinked back to your usual seat. Now that you were sitting on your own, it became obvious that the heat between your thighs was not entirely from his legs warming you up. You pulled the hem of your skirt down just a tad. The adrenaline of the moment hadn't stopped, even though you were reminded of the existence of the crowd that had just watched you. You didn't want it to end. You'd give anything for the room to be empty right now, like the lab at night. You pulled out your phone and sent a message to Anakin, your fingers wobbly on the keyboard.

Upstairs. Follow me in 3 mind, the text said. Fuck. Maybe you were a bit drunk. *Mins, you corrected. Anakin checked his phone almost instantly, his eyes still locked on you from before, and quickly typed something back. k. You waited two more rounds of questions before getting up.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom," you said to Ahsoka, who was absorbed in some kind of debate with Fives and Cody. She nodded at you, and then you were off. You weaved through people, up to the floor with the bedrooms, which was much less populated than the downstairs. There were a few rooms that seemed either occupied or locked, but one at the end of the hall sat ajar. You entered, leaving the door cracked so Anakin would know where you were, then sat down on the bed. It was a twin, in a decently clean room that had a bunch of posters for bands along the walls. Whoever lived here really liked Pink Floyd, apparently. It was actually nice up there; the music was pumping through the building, but it was a nice backdrop this far from the speakers. The window was open, so the cool breeze was flowing.

A few moments later, the door opened. The second you saw Anakin, you pounced on him. He let out a slightly surprised mmph, but then feverishly kissed you back. Anakin tasted like alcohol and orange juice, but you didn't mind. As long as he was kissing you, he could taste however he wanted. One of his hands scrabbled behind him to find the door handle and shut it, while the other came up to your jaw. Whatever desires he had downstairs, he was clearly showing them now. His hand went down to grab your ass, his fingers pressing into the soft flesh. You pressed yourself against him, just like you were downstairs, your whole bodies melded together until you didn't know where he began and you ended. The way Anakin kissed you was intoxicating, more so than any of the shots you had taken that night. More than any drug you would ever take. That fire, that anger-desire-passion-whatever that burned in you intensified until the music downstairs and the unfamiliar surroundings faded away, and all you could feel was him.

You rocked your hips forward, just to test his response, and he growled into your mouth with a ferocity you didn't expect, but loved anyway. Fuck, you'd do anything to hear that again, to hear it all the time. He pulled your hips into his, grinding against you in the process.

Suddenly, he twisted around so he was pressing you against the door with his body enveloping you. Anakin trailed down from your lips to your jaw to your neck. The little nips and wet kisses were driving you wild, so you decided to return the favor and snaked your hand down his chest, which was shockingly hard and muscular, until you reached the hem of his shirt. Your fingers toyed with the edges where his skin met the soft cotton, and you could feel his ragged intake of breath when you trailed even further up. He pulled away, his breathing still heavy. You thought and hoped he would take his shirt off. To show you what you'd seen on the rare times his shirt had ridden up while he took off a hoodie or jacket. Instead, he just looked at you and stopped.

"Fuck me, please," you whispered into the room. For a moment, he looked like he was strongly considering it, and you found yourself praying he would say yes.

"How many drinks have you had?"

"I don't know, like four? Does it matter?" You shrugged. "It doesn't change that I want you," you whispered in a way you hoped was seductive. Anakin got off you so quickly that you were almost hurt, but he still remained close enough that it soothed the sting.

"I'm sorry. It's going to kill me to say this, but we shouldn't do this now. I've only had one drink and you're clearly not thinking straight," he said. His eyes were so full of concern that you almost didn't get mad at him. Almost.

"No, I'm thinking very straight. I'll say the alphabet backwards if you want," you offered, getting closer to him again. He took another step back.

"I'm talking about your decisions. I don't want to have sex, and then have you wake up in the morning and regret it. Just--let's go back to yours." He caught the look in your eye, which clearly meant that yes, you would indeed like to go back to your place, then hurried to add more.

"Not like that. You go to sleep. I'll stay in your living room. In the morning, if you still want to do this, I'll fuck you right then and there." Anakin rumbled the last words out so intently, so full of promise, that you finally conceded.

"Fine, let's go. But as soon as I wake up, I'll take you up on that. And then I'm going to the lab. I've gotta get back to work," you said, letting him past you to open the door for you. Anakin chuckled.

"Maybe you're more sober than I thought." The two of you went back down the hallway, past the other closed doors to the staircase, which was somehow even sweatier than you remembered, then past the living room to the entrance. Anakin's hand was clasped around yours the entire time, to make sure he didn't lose you, and you found that, actually, you didn't mind the contact. You wanted to do it a lot, even sometimes outside of sex. But that was the tequila talking. In fact, the tequila was doing a lot of talking right now, and the world was a little bit wobbly and fluid. Your head was heavy, and you found yourself stumbling a few times in your impractical heels.

Somehow, in all the chaos, Anakin found Rex by the entrance. You couldn't hear every word he said, but you caught "too drunk," "going home," and "make sure Ahsoka gets home safely." The 15 minute walk home passed by in a blur because you were a bit too distracted by the smell of Anakin's jacket around your shoulders. You really were stumbling around, and Anakin had to catch you a few times, but you made it back to your dorm in one piece.

This time, instead of going to the west elevator, Anakin followed you to the east, then up, up, all the way until you got to the tenth floor. Your key scraped against the lock, and you could hear Anakin's impatient sigh as you missed the hole again. You finally got it in, then got into your apartment and immediately flopped face-first onto your bed. Everything was a muddled mess after that. Anakin helped you take your shoes off, though not without making fun of you for being so drunk first, and then handed you a makeup wipe. You slapped it across your face a few times, then tossed it to the side. With a quick "good night," Anakin was about to leave your bedroom to crash on the living room couch.

"C'mere," you called, sitting up and stopping him in his tracks. He approached the bed, then sat down next to you until you put your head on his shoulder. This was bad, you knew, but it felt, for a moment, like that didn't matter. "Stay." Your voice was so small, so quiet. Vulnerable.

"I want to, but, no, I really should--" You interrupted him, still a little drunk and groggy but definitely annoyed. Could the bastard stop trying to be chivalrous for one second?

"If you don't stay, I am gonna dunk your Arduino in water. After you've soldered it." The threat was slightly diminished by the way you nuzzled his shoulder, but it worked anyway. Anakin was always a sucker. His deep sigh confirmed it.

"Fine. Just--oh God this is weird--let me take off my jeans if I'm going to sleep in a bed." You nodded and watched as he stood up, then unbuttoned them and pulled them down so he was in loose boxers and his t-shirt. His strong legs were on display, and you filed the image away for later as he crawled in behind you on the tiny twin bed. Your bed was shoved into the corner of the room, so he had to smush himself between you and the wall, but he managed it with only minimal complaining. He was so warm, so big and comforting. Maybe this was the relaxation you needed tonight, not a stupid party. Maybe you could do this more often. Anakin put his arm around your stomach, pulling you into him. Yup, you definitely had to do this more often. His breath tickled the back of your neck delightfully, and his bare legs felt incredible against yours.

"Is this okay?" You didn't have time to answer with anything more than a mhmm before you fell asleep. It was the most restful sleep you had in months, but that wasn't because of Anakin. Maybe it was. Maybe, just maybe, he wasn't so bad. Maybe you liked him a bit, when he wasn't being an ass. But that was probably the tequila talking. It was the tequila, really.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Tag List (let me know if you'd like to be added!): @skywalkercinema @throughparisallthroughrome @anak1ns-wife @radiantvader @eloquenceinpurple @rosekillerdaughter @doblasftcisco @mistress-amidala @mortalheartache @sunnytotheend @olivia091108 @aniiuv @sotal3rsa @springnaiad @bettysgardenswift @rhiannonhippiegirl @xorilixx

if the tag didn't go through, it might be a tumblr setting issue, so message me if you'd like to find some other way to be notified :)

[charliemwrites]

screaming just imagining (woof! Woof!) Johnny trying to convince reader to call, well, him. But in the dumbest ways imaginable because he’s, well, him.

A (not-so) little wolf dog running around the house secretly causing more problems than you’ve ever had before. Firmly in the mindset that you’ll eventually cave and call up the big strong man you met at the bar to fix them for you!!!

And it’s so confusing for poor you. Before everything went wrong you considered yourself pretty handy. It takes a lot to live on your own but you’ve managed exceptionally well, thank you very much. But now all of a sudden there’s your door coming off its hinges (definitely not because someone loosened the bolts behind your back), a leak in your sink (definitely not because someone messed with the pipes), and your cocking has been mysteriously peeled away overnight (Definitely not because someone was picking at it).

It escalates to holes in your fencing, low water pressure, and god damn it your electricity is on the fritz now, too. (That last one actually wasn’t him. Promise.)

You blow off steam at the bar and lo and behold there’s Soap waiting for you again. Stating you down in an uncomfortably tense manner. Like every muscle in his body’s pulled taught ready to heel at your side if you called for him. You elect to ignore him because honestly you just need a drink or three after the week you’ve had. Isn’t it hilarious that COINCIDENTALLY your not-so-secret admirer is so knowledgeable about wiring? That his hands are so steady and he’s just so hand(s)y in general? Dw, he’s good with explosive personalities, too.

lost steam towards the end and I apologize for the bad pun but you get the vision? Insane about this literal dog of a man 🤭

Normally I’d put you in jail for the pun, but I love this concept so much I’ll allow it.

You wake up in the middle of the night, wondering where your precious snuggle buddy is. Find him in the kitchen, sniffing at your fridge that mysteriously isn’t working.

You could scream!

And normally you wouldn’t spout about your issues to a stranger - or sort-of-stranger — like soap, but you’re jussst tipsy enough when he asks what sorrows you’re drowning. When he offers to help, you know you should say no…

But he’s been so attentive and understanding. Saying all the right things and making the right faces (okay maybe you’re more than a little tipsy to notice that his tone is off and his grimace doesn’t reach his hungry eyes). And besides, these repairs are going to be expensive and you’ve already got a big boy to feed!! Soap is willing to help for a beer and good company, he said.

So yeah, you give him your address, take a taxi home, and drunkenly leave kisses all over your pup. Tell him to be soooo nice to the guy coming over tomorrow, you can’t handle an ER visit on top of everything else.

But he’s mysteriously gone the next morning when a bright-eyed Soap knocks on your door, tool kit in hand.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

You seem like an incredibly well read person, plus someone with a lot of insight into intimacy because of your work. So, in light of your romance book reviews, which are an absolute highlight on your patreon, do you have any insight into what is needed/suggested for a good romance novel?

g o d this is so fucking hard and also really fun to chew on. I want to preface this by saying this is ENTIRELY subjective and based completely on what I *PERSONALLY* find that I enjoy in a romance. this isn't, like, an objective guide on how to write a romance that doesn't suck. that doesn't exist because people like different things, and I'm speaking from one perspective.

also I should say that my preferred flavor of romance novel is solidly contemporary. I haven't read many historicals, certainly not enough to opine well on them, I don't do those mafia dark romances or whatever the fuck, and I've barely dabbled at all in any kind of fantasy romance, whether they're full high fantasy or witchy urban fantasy stories. (although I'm about to do one of the latter next month, you can vote for a book on my patreon rn!)

having gotten all of those caveats out of the way, here's some shit I like and dislike:

there are exceptions to this but broadly, I prefer a POV for everyone involved in the relationship. to me a romance where we're only seeing events from the POV of one member of the relationship automatically makes it seem like one person matters more in a dynamic where everyone should be of equal importance. also, god, if the plot's really going to hinge on not knowing what's going on in one partner's head suggests that miscommunication is going to be a pretty critical part of the plot, and I hate that shit. TALK TO EACH OTHER. I'LL KILL YOU.

on that note, there needs to be an actual compelling reason why the characters can't be together, okay? the #1 driving tension of every romance is "why the fuck can't they be together yet" and you BETTER have a good answer. whether it's interpersonal or external forces, if there's a very easy solution to what's keeping them apart then your characters look dumb and I'm bored. one of the most frustrating romances I've ever read involved two characters who were mutually attracted to each from the JUMP, who refused to act on it because they were coworkers (neither of them in any position of authority of the other, nothing unprofessional or inappropriate about it) and they were "only" living in the same state for A YEAR. A FULL YEAR !!! shut up. get a grip and kiss each other.

now, having said that: whatever your bullshit reason is for these two characters to be interacting with each other, you need to COMMIT to that shit so hard that I, the reader, will feel silly for even questioning the logic. the worst offender I've ever seen on this front is D'Vaughn and Kris Plan a Wedding, which pulls its protagonists together via a reality TV competition and then just... promptly loses any interest in really dealing with the actual realities of being filmed 24/7? it's insanely distracting how little the book engages with its central hook, and was a huge point deduction for me. whereas you have, like, The Bride Test, a book with a premise that skirts dangerously close to a little bit of human trafficking but embraces the whole premise so wholeheartedly that you completely forget about the potentially horrific elements in there. who cares that Esme was bribed here with the promise of a green card if she seduces a man she's never met? there's whimsy happening! we've moved on! it's literally fine and she's in no danger except the danger of a BROKEN HEART.

this one is going to seem SO obvious but like. I need them to be actually like each other. I'm not saying they can't be mutually bitchy while they grow to like each other or anything, they don't have to always be NICE to each other, but there are so many M/F romances where the dude is just flat out fucking MEAN and condescending to the girl until he decides he wants to fuck her. and sometimes even after that! stop it! after a certain point I don't want her to fuck him I want her to run him over a car!!!! there's suuuuch a line between "guy I butt heads and exchange banter with but could fuck if we just got to know each other" and "man who hates me and is for real fucking bullying me."

"kisses only," "doors closed," whatever term they use for a romance novel without any sex scenes on page, I don't like it. listen: I know that they're not everybody's cup of tea, and I FULLY recognize that a lot of romance novel sex scenes are unfathomably cringe. and yet, I need them. partly because they're funny, but also because if this book wants me to be invested in the developing relationship between two adults who are supposed to be WILDLY sexually attracted to each other, then I want to see the damn sex. no matter how many bad similes or unfortunate adjectives it entails. and if you're not going to show me the sex, don't you dare have the characters gushing about how great it is. I'll be the judge of that, thank you very much. (I'm looking at you, Sorry, Bro.)

related: there's this thing that I call "Horny Wolf Syndrome," which is derived from this tweet:

initially I used it to refer to when previously sweet-tempered male romance protags inexplicably started talking like horny wovles during sex scenes - "LET ME SEE YOUR PRETTY CUNT ON MY COCK" and the like - but now I more generally use it to refer to scenarios in which characters of any gender completely dispense with their established personality while they fuck in order to fulfill a more broadly appealing, one-size-fits-all sexual fantasy. I hate that shit; if your characters act like completely unrecognizable people during sex, you didn't write very strong characters. one of my favorite things about writing sex scenes is that it's so SO interesting to see how their the characters' personal quirks translate into a setting that's very different from most other contexts, and it's deeply disappointing when authors take the easy route in favor of some pornhub dialogue.

one of the things that actually won my most recent read, Raiders of the Lost Heart, a HUGE amount of points with me was how frank the female lead was about initiating sex for the first time. it was completely in character for her and felt really different than any other book I've read, and honestly? it was a breath of fresh air.

[avocado-writing]

bowser x gn!reader

1.6k words

part 1 of ?

rated: T (for now)

summary: you’re happy with your lot as nanny to the koopalings... until a chance encounter with the king sets your life off in a very different trajectory. 

Few people like their jobs, but you’re lucky enough to count yourself among them. 

Sure, there were places to work that weren’t as covered in lava. A little less rowdy and loud. But you’ve lived in the Dark Lands for so long they’re home now, and how you couldn’t imagine a day without needing to dodge a spit of errant fire from the ground. 

Well, maybe you could. But you know now how to listen out for the telltale crack before an eruption, so you’re much less flammable than you used to be!

Maybe things would have been different if you didn’t get the job so… normally. Several years ago you saw a “help wanted” flyer advertising for a royal nanny, and, with Bowser’s reputation, people weren’t exactly chomping at the bit to apply. But you’d always had a way with kids so decided to give it a shot. This has been back when it was only Ludwig and Morton, and they’d only been young - not the eight terrors nowadays. It wasn’t so much a trial shift as a “try not to let them kill you” challenge, and when they didn’t you were hired immediately by a snivelling little man you’d later come to know as Kamek. 

You never grew to like Kamek, exactly, but you loved the Koopalings. Your original duties hadn’t been too taxing. Mostly just some gentle discipline and education, as well as keeping them from maiming each other. They were rowdy kids. But they quickly grew fond of you and you of them, and it wasn’t long before the kids were acting like you’d always been there: a trusted adult who they could rely on to look after them. 

Nowadays you can truly say that they’re sweet kids. Boisterous but with a soft side buried beneath - a lot like their father in that way. 

Ah, Bowser. You can still remember the first time you met him. All those years ago. You’d been employed for a couple of weeks, and were hard at work cleaning up the playroom when a pitter-pattering of tiny feet let you know someone was approaching. And when Morton entered the room in tears and ran to hug you, instinct kicked in and you held the little tyke close. Ludwig had been going through a phase of teasing him about his star-shaped birthmark and Morton hadn’t been taking it very well. It led to fisticuffs almost certainly and tears more often than not. 

“Oh honey, don’t listen to him,” you hummed, rubbing his shell soothingly. From his sniffles you knew you’d hit the nail on the head, “I like your star.”

Morton had pulled back enough to study your face, try and scrutinise it in search of a lie, but when he found you were sincere managed a wobbly smile. 

Then Bowser threw the door off of its hinges.  

“Morton-?!”

His eyes were wide, confused, a little angry as he took you in. As if trying to work out why his child would be in the arms of a stranger. Then his face softened as he put the pieces together in his mind. 

“Uh, new nanny Kamek hired, right?”

“Yes sire,” you replied, a bit dazed from the splintered wood you just had to dodge, and not wanting to untangle from the distressed child to bow so instead choosing to nod deeply. Bowser looked at how Morton clung to you, his little muzzle buried into your clothes for comfort. 

“Morton, you okay, little buddy?” he asked, more gently than the rumours about him led you to believe was possible. Morton nodded but stayed in your arms. Bowser let out a sigh.  

“Okay, well… good.” He looked up at you. “You uh, keep doing that.”

So you did. 

It was strange, seeing such a gentle side to Bowser from the offset. You’d heard he was a fearsome and fierce ruler - and, well, he was - but he also was a devoted father, too. And as more Koopalings came along to pad out the pack you found yourself growing happier and happier with your work. You were paid very handsomely, you were safe in the castle, and the children loved you so much that you were practically part of the family. 

And… Bowser. Well, so what if your heart had a funny fluttering feeling inside it when you saw him sit down to have a tea party with his kids? That didn’t have to mean anything. Anyone would feel that way about a strong, handsome king. Besides you were certain he saw you as no more than a friendly face, a trusted confidant. Someone who’d been a rock by his side for years. He didn’t need to worry about his children when you were there to corral them.  

You were content with your lot in life. 

And maybe things would have stayed that way if you hadn't happened upon Bowser after that fight. 

It’s been a normal day. After a rowdy lesson which turned into less violence than you thankfully expected, the kids had headed off to do some kart racing. Now you’re just off to tidy the nursery - though perhaps the children are a little too old to call it that, it’s mostly referred to as the “games room” where their more expensive electronics are kept - before retiring to your quarters for the night. You expect to just have to clean up a few abandoned snack wrappers… so the breath is knocked out of you when you see the trail of blood. 

Immediately you assume it’s one of the kids. Nanny instincts kicking in you take off down the corridor, round the corner, and - 

See Bowser there. In the games room. He’s digging through one of your cabinets, muttering to himself. In fact he doesn’t even notice you approach him until your foot catches an abandoned controller; it goes skittering across the room and bumps against the wall, making the king jump and spin around to face you. There’s a nasty gash along his arm and he winces when you notice it - you’re not sure if it’s because of the pain or the fact you’ve caught him with your first aid kit in hand, trying to bandage himself up.

“Are you all right, sir?” you ask, quickly gathering your wits. Bowser huffs.

“Yeah, just got beat up is all.”

You frown. You’ve helped raise his children for long enough to know when he’s hiding something.

“It was that plumber again, wasn’t it?”

Another wince, but this time followed by a nod. You hold out your hand and motion towards the kit he’s clutching like a lifeline.

“Here, give that to me. I’ll clean you up.”

You’re using your ‘no-nonsense’ voice and it works a charm. Bowser sighs and complies easily, heading to the nearest beanbag and planting himself down on it. He mutters a little in irritation as the spikes on his shell pierce the fabric and a few beans spill onto the floor.

“Don’t worry about that. I’m used to patching those up for the kids,” you state, kneeling in front of him and opening the first aid box. Bowser watches you in intrigued silence as you clean the wound thoroughly before beginning to bandage it.

“Hey, can I ask you a question?”

His voice is gentle enough to make you stop what you’re doing and look up. You’re not sure you’ve ever really noticed the colour of his eyes before. They’re a sort of dark red-brown. It’s nice. 

“Anything you want, my king.”

“Look, just ‘Bowser’ is fine, okay? We’ve been friends long enough.”

His admission of this surprises you, and sends a warm feeling through you that you don’t have time to dissect.

“Alright… Bowser. Fire away.”

“Do I scare you?”

Carefully you tie off the bandage before sitting back on your haunches to face him.

“Not really.” He seems surprised. “Oh, uh, sorry - do you want to scare me?”

“Well, no, I guess not. Just I’m kinda scary looking, y’know? The spikes and the fire and all that. That doesn’t freak you out?”

To add to this he begins to summon flames in the back of his throat. They dance against his teeth. He’d certainly seem menacing if you didn’t know better.

“Nope, not at all. I’ve looked after most of your children through their terrible twos, being three-nagers, and you would not believe how well equipped I am to deal with fire. If any of the kids even try that with me they get a time out. Don’t make me give you one, too.”

You say that last part as a joke, but don’t miss the way Bowser’s jaw visibly clenches at the idea. You’re not sure if it’s because he’s annoyed or… for some other reason. Flustered a little you decide to try and move on.

“There, all done. If you get hurt again just come straight to me, I don’t mind patching you up.”

You go to put the kit back, assuming that will be the end of things.

“Uh, thanks for doing all this. You’re… you’re nice to talk to.”

His voice is small, like he’s telling you a secret. It elicits a genuine smile from you as you turn around to face him. He’s looking at his claws, a sure sign of shyness - you know because Junior does it too.

“You’re nice to talk to too, Bowser.”

The way his face lights up makes your heart begin to race.

Hmm. You might be in trouble here.

lmk if you’d like to be tagged for future parts!

[undead-supernova]

HIGH TOLERANCE

Only 10mg / Masterlist

Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5

warnings: so much angst, a night gone wrong, more (derogatory) Steve, Gertrude (extra derogatory), Delta-9 gummies

pairings: modern!bestfriend!Eddie x bisexual!fem!reader

plot: dates aren't always what you want them to be...let alone with people who you don't really want to be on dates with

wc: 4k

song inspirations: VOID by Melanie Martinez, We Are Nobody Else by Lady Lamb

“What do you mean you haven’t seen any movies this year?”

“I mean, I’ve seen movies. I just haven’t found anything I thought was interesting in the last eight months.”

“What do you watch then?”

This morning you actually found someone on Hinge named Gertrude and by the afternoon you were on a lunch date. And you’d thought they were cute when you met up at Grub Burger, like really cute, with thin-rimmed rectangular glasses and a long dark braid down their back. They had a soft voice and an even softer smile…but it was quickly starting to go downhill.

Every question they threw at you felt like an investigation where you were wrong every single time, as if your preferences weren’t good enough. Even the lack of movies you’d seen.

In your defense, you usually went to the movie theater if Eddie asked. He was really good at guessing when a movie’s going to be worthwhile (and you weren’t). He never once disappointed. He’d also never taken you to a movie without at least giving you something of the cannabis persuasion and buying a large popcorn for you to share. 

Sometimes he even bought your ticket.

Which you always pretended were dates like the desperate woman you were.

“Yeah, I really like 2000s movies,” you replied, shrugging. “I’ll pop on a Seth Rogan film every once and a while. Like, I know they’re a little outdated or whatever, but they’re fun. Oh, especially if you smoke some weed. Then it’s super funny. Like, This Is The End? It’s just cool to see all these actors—"

“I mean, they’re, like, super problematic,” Gertrude interrupted.

You nodded. “No, I know,” you agreed, scratching at your neck. “I know. It’s not the best, but like, I recognize that. I don’t think it’s all funny. And it’s not just Seth Rogan, there are other genres like dramas and fantasy and horror. Have you heard of the movie The Invisible? It’s about this guy who dies and is a ghost and can’t talk to anyone and finds out he—”

“I just thought because you’re queer, you’d have better standards for the media you consume.”

Pausing, you felt yourself deflate. You shrugged again, wondering how this conversation was turning into something else entirely. “I mean, I think you could argue that every piece of media is problematic, depending on the way you look at it. If you acknowledge that the media you like is flawed, you’re still allowed to enjoy it. It’s not that hard.”

Gertrude gave you that judgmental look again, pushing their fork around their French fries. “Agree to disagree. Anyways, maybe you should ask me a question now.”

As if I had had any chance to ask anything since we sat down.

“Uh, okay. What’s your favorite color?”

Gertrude finally smiled for the first time since you’d greeted each other. They really were pretty. There was just something so grating about their attitude…

“I think I like a soft yellow, something bright and cheery.”

You nodded, trying to seem more interested than you were. Some part of you even felt like laughing. “Yeah, yellow’s a good color. Very vibrant. Makes you happy.”

“What about you?”

“I don’t know. Maybe black? Red?”

Steve sighed, scratching his bare thigh before going back to his cherry and goat cheese ice cream. Eddie merely stared down at his cream puff flavor, unsure as to why he thought this date would be a good idea. He’d suggested they go out to get ice cream (definitely not to distract himself from what was probably happening across town with someone who he definitely wasn’t thinking about). 

But Steve didn’t remotely hesitate, making Eddie think that maybe that was a sign. He was in it now. They were getting somewhere…

If only it hadn’t started going downhill just from asking basic questions that they somehow hadn’t thought of in the last however many years of knowing each other.

“Ah, come on, Eddie. You can’t say red!”

Eddie’s eyebrows furrowed, trying not to get irritated. “Why not?” he asked. “It’s a color. That was part of the assignment.”

“I just feel like it’s a little stereotypical for you.”

“Why, ‘cause I like metal?” Eddie guessed with a sigh sitting in the back of his throat. He was careful not to release it.

“Uh, yeah,” Steve replied. Like it was obvious. Like it was stupid. “Precisely.”

“Okay, then what’s yours, big guy?”

“Probably red or green,” you answered. “Not a soft green. More like a deep emerald?”

“Like Christmas?”

You shook your head. To give them credit, it was a common question you got whenever anyone cared enough to ask.

Well, except for one person...

“Well, no. I wouldn’t consider myself someone who likes Christmas all that much.”

“Let me guess, your favorite holiday is something weird, like St. Patrick’s Day.”

What the hell was this person even talking about? Were they hearing themselves talk?

You successfully suppressed your sigh before you decided to answer honestly. “Uh, my favorite holiday is Halloween.”

“Next you’re gonna tell me your favorite holiday is Halloween.”

Eddie raised an eyebrow. “Uh, because it is.” What was Steve even talking about? Why was he suddenly being so fucking judgmental? “Let me guess, your favorite is Christmas,” he bit back.

Steve laughed, oblivious to Eddie’s venom. “Yeah, the lights are cool. The hot chocolate with the peppermint in it. Oh, and the snow. You can layer everything. I mean, it’s cute. Plus,” he stopped, clearly trying to make his next sentence sound less rude. “I just think Halloween is a little…meh.”

“Meh?”

Steve shrugged. “Yeah.”

“What beef do you have with Halloween?”

“It’s just a little overdone, don’t you think?”

You shook your head, appalled as to why they didn’t get how important the holiday was. 

“No, I think it’s about expressing yourself and becoming something more than what you are. It gives kids a moment of exploration of themselves and creativity. Not to mention its importance for queer people and how they can have one night where they can be themselves—"

“—without the scrutiny of the public. We could walk out in drag or anything feminine whatsoever and it’s not considered threatening, even if that’s shitty in and of itself. But it’s still that opportunity.” Eddie smiled to himself. “That chance. It’s bringing a sense of fucking safety that’s otherwise missing.”

Steve nodded before he shrugged, scraping at the bottom of his cup. “Yeah, you make a good point. I guess I haven’t really thought about it like that.”

Eddie forgot that he and Steve never really had conversations like these. It was usually you who he could talk to for hours on end, deconstructing what it meant to live and how everything was about perspective. Inebriated, sober—it didn’t matter. Like those days at the aquarium, you were able to see the bigger picture at the end of the day. You talked about stuff like this without even having to be asked.

That ticket still sat in his wallet. He always took it out whenever he needed a pick-me-up. It gave him a spark of hope that life could change for the better if someone like you existed.

Steve kept talking, but Eddie was pulling out his wallet and running his fingers over the ticket like it would bring you here and he could have you here instead. 

As you and Gertrude fell into silence, you put your hand in your skirt pocket, feeling the smoothness of Eddie’s yellow pick. Tracing the edges, you wondered what it felt like for him to run it down his strings. How it fit in his fingers. 

How he was doing.

Where he was.

If he was available.

You looked at Gertrude, watching them scroll through their TikTok feed, volume up, before you stood and grabbed your purse.

“I have to go.”

Eddie watched Steve reach the very bottom of his cup, hoping there was a way for him to slip in a reason to leave. Because, holy shit, this was a piss poor excuse for a date.

He looked back over at the long line forming at the door, knowing you would die to have a cup of the wildberry lavender flavor. You were a big fan of Jeni’s Ice Cream and always gave him grief whenever he went without you. It was kind of funny how your face would screw up as you yelled at him for being a traitor. He nearly chuckled at the memory. 

And it suddenly hit him that he was way more concerned with his thoughts of you.

How your date was going.

Where you were.

If you were available.

Fuck having a good enough reason to leave.

“Can we go?”

You basically sprinted to your car, barely registering how rude you had just been. You didn’t say goodbye, didn’t even give them an excuse. But you argued to, well, yourself that telling them some shitty excuse would be ruder than not saying anything at all. 

All you wanted was to talk to Eddie and tell him about how awful your date was. How mean Gertrude was and how confused you were about what the hell you’d done to deserve their scrutiny.

Sighing, you scrambled into the front seat and tossed your phone onto the passenger seat.  Pulling out Eddie’s guitar pick, you tried to calm yourself down. You studied the brand, the tiny tortoise outline with the shell replaced with the Tortex brand name. It read that it was a Dunlop, 50mm. Smooth. Thin. The kind Eddie always said he preferred, always said it hit the strings so magically. Said it rang out the bottom E string, like it was trying to reach the heavens and got there every time. 

And there was your eyeliner, ruining it.

You shook your head, resigning to the fact that you probably should just go home and isolate yourself for a while. Try and figure out how the hell you were supposed to be normal around Eddie and Steve the next time you saw them together.

Is that how it’s going to be now? you wondered, feeling nausea pool in your stomach. Are they going to be a package deal? Is that something I could survive?

For how long?

Before you could even start your car, your phone started going off. As soon as you saw Eddie’s picture pop up, you let out a sigh of relief.

“Hey,” he breathed, sounding as exhausted as you felt.

“Hey, hello,” you replied, trying to calm yourself down. “Hi. I was actually about to call you.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah. I just had the worst date ever,” you grumbled, trying to rub the eyeliner off the pick.

“Me, too.”

You sat up straighter, shoving the pick back in your pocket. “Really?”

“God, yeah. I’m never going to Jeni’s without you again.”

“You went to Jeni’s without me?” With Steve, you felt like adding. 

But you were going to be good. Just this once.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Like I said, I’m never going without you ever again.” You let out an irritated huff. “Listen, Weirdo, would you mind if I came over and we took some edibles and, like, watched a movie?”

Thank God.    

“Yes, please.”

“See you in twenty?”

You smiled. “See you in twenty. Traitor.”

Eddie had gotten back to your apartment at the same time as you, both fighting for the closest parking spot with playful honks. You may have almost hit his van. And he could (maybe) admit that he almost deserved it.

“That’s rude,” he said as he hopped down from the van. “That’s just—”

He stopped as he finally got a look at you. Because it wasn’t even fair anymore, the way you just being you flustered him. Just standing next to your car with a simple Joan Jett t-shirt tucked into a short skirt and black Converse. Some sword earrings. And fishnets. Fucking fishnets.

Did he mention that you were wearing a different pair than the night before?

How many do you fucking own?

“That’s just what?” you asked, looking confused.

Eddie had to get a grip. He couldn’t keep doing this, couldn’t keep losing his focus whenever you were around. Hell, he was already losing his focus when you weren’t. When you were looking like this, it made everything worse. Much, much worse. 

He shook his head before poking your shoulder. “Extremely rude.”

You rolled your eyes and swatted his hand away, starting the short walk up to your apartment. “Hey, you asked me to hang and then you tried to steal my favorite parking spot? Where are your manners?”

“I think we both know I lost those years ago.”

“Okay, weirdo,” you said.

“Uh, what did you just call me?” Eddie asked playfully, clasping his hand over his chest. 

A giggle escaped your lips as you ascended the stairs, making his smile widen.

“You heard me!” you exclaimed as you quickened your pace up the steps. “And I will not be taking it back!”

The two of you bickered like always, going back and forth with seemingly no end to each bit that you started and never truly seemed to finish. Sometimes it felt like he couldn’t help himself around you, always excited to hear what you had to say or what you wanted to do. Anything you wanted, because any opportunity to be around you was an opportunity worth taking.

You decided to heat up leftover soup for you both, maneuvering around the kitchen while you complained about the weather and your upstairs neighbor who was taking all the warm water these days despite the scorching heat.

Eddie wouldn’t admit it, but he was having a hard time paying attention to your words. How could he when your hands were waving around the air and putting your hair up? How in the hell was he supposed to pay attention when you decided to run chapstick over your lips? Or when you bent down to take your shoes off, skirt riding up just enough to reveal the lining of red underwear? And how was he supposed to feel normal when you were wearing the cutest fucking socks, with black cats sporting witch hats next to a brewing cauldron? 

“I’m gonna go pick out a movie,” Eddie said suddenly, backing away from the kitchen.

“Oh, yeah,” you said absentmindedly as you fiddled with the microwave. “That’s a really good idea. What’re you gonna put on?”

“No idea,” he lied. “Absolutely no idea.”

After you finished the chickpea and sausage soup, you and Eddie popped 10mg Delta-9 gummies and decided to chill on the couch. As soon as Eddie pressed play on your remote, you immediately knew it was the opening to When Harry Met Sally. Like always. 

But it wasn’t like you were paying attention. If anything, you were talking over it like you were in a crowded room. Small talk here and there until you were unable to keep your questions to yourself.

“So, you said your date with Steve didn’t go well,” you said. “Do you want to maybe talk about it?”

Eddie groaned, throwing his hands over his face. You may have taken the opportunity to stare at him, how his tattoos were visible. He’d shown up in his jean jacket but discarded it as if he was taunting you with only a black tank top and jeans. His guitar pick necklace around his neck. Rings. Threaded bracelets and watch. That fucking nail polish…

Focus, you told yourself. Just focus.

“I don’t know…” he trailed, biting his lip.

“I’ll share mine if you share yours,” you suggested.

A sigh left his lips before he gave in. “He thought it was predictable that I liked black and Halloween.”

“Has he even met you?” you asked, scoffing. “Of course you do. That’s, like, your whole thing. It’s not predictable, it’s just who you are.”

“I know! It was so weird. We’ve known each other since high school. I don’t know how he didn’t know that already. Rob knows more than him, apparently.”

“She’s extremely observant,” you noted.

Too observant.

“That’s a good...observation.” Now it was your turn to groan, making Eddie laugh before he added, “Now’s your turn, Weirdo.”

Well, I couldn’t stop thinking about you the entire time. So what does that say about me?

“I got absolutely slammed for my shitty 2000s comedies.”

“But Michael Cera is a visionary…” he trailed, confused.

“Well, apparently they’re all problematic and I’m damaging our community.”

Eddie shook his head, rolling his eyes. “Whatever. So is everything else. Besides, you don’t even laugh at the bad stuff. It’s like eating around a bad food you like. It’s not like the whole plate is bad, right? Most of it’s good.”

“That’s what I’m saying!” you exclaimed, throwing your hand up. “It’s like eating at Waffle House. You know it’s not going to be the best meal you’ve ever had, but damn if those waffles don’t hit the spot every time. Especially when you’re fucked up.”

“You get it! You may be the smartest person I’ve met.”

“Or maybe the dumbest.”

“Nah, you’re pretty intelligent…when you want to be.”

“Ouch!” you said, grabbing one of your throw pillows and whacking him with it. “Take that.”

Before you could take another shot, he took the pillow from you and hit you back. “You deserved that one, Weirdo.”

You fell into gentle laughter, shaking your head at him before you sighed and leaned your head on the back cushion. Eddie readjusted, also leaning his head back so he could make eye contact with you. He wrapped his arms around the pillow, hugging it to his chest.

For a moment, you just kind of sat there and looked at him. Watched his eyes flicker back and forth between yours while you did the same. Studied the brown, the way his pupils dilated as you kept staring at each other. You couldn’t say how long that lasted before you finally said something.

“I just don’t think it’s supposed to be this hard.”

 “What, dating?” he asked, tightening his grasp on the pillow.

“Yeah.”

He nodded, letting out a hum. “I don’t think so, either.”

You looked away from Eddie’s gaze to find him fiddling with the pillow’s black fringe, clearly anxious about something. It was exactly how he played with his lighter or tapped his leg. Rapid, incessant. Finding his bearings through the texture as if it could keep his attention longer than a few seconds.

And then he said your name, bringing your eyes back to his.

“Should I keep seeing Steve?” he asked.

This time you were the one readjusting, feeling yourself scoot even closer to him. Your legs were touching, the blanket seeming to slip halfway off you two. But neither of you moved to fix it. 

“Does Steve make you happy?”

“I…I don’t know.” He let out a staggered breath. “I think so.”

And you tried not to, but your leg was slipping further down his calf. Blanket be damned—you were already starting to burn.

“Tell me something. Why do you always put When Harry Met Sally on?” you asked, trying to steer away from the subject of Steve Harrington. Trying to distract yourself from the heat building inside you. Trying to distract yourself from thinking something stupid. “I thought the second Lord of the Rings movie was your favorite. The Two Towers.”

He shrugged. “No, yeah. The Two Towers is my favorite. I just think I’ve just always related to When Harry Met Sally. Always missing my chances, opportunities. Always just one step away from getting what I want.”

Was Eddie getting…closer?

You raised an eyebrow. “Missing your chances?”

And why was he staring at your mouth?

“Yeah.”

But weren’t you also staring at his?

“Are you, um, Harry?” you asked, trying to keep yourself from doing something stupid. “Or are you Sally?”

Why was he so close to making you do something stupid?

“Depends on the day,” he said, softer this time.

And why was he leaning closer, searching your eyes for some kind of confirmation that this was okay?

And why were you about to let him?

“What do you want?” you asked, barely above a whisper.

Eddie didn’t answer, the hum of Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal being the only sound left in the room other than your shared breathing. 

“What has she done? She makes desserts.”

It was growing heavier the closer he got to you, maybe the closest you’d ever been since you met. And it was so strange, the way he affected you.

“You all went to a Met game together?”

Your fingers reached out, searching for his. Found it on his thigh, also reaching for yours. Fingers touching, itching to twine. And it was so strange, the way he moved you.

“But Sally hates baseball.”

And there Eddie was, leaning in more and more, his breath seeming to intoxicate you the more it fanned over your face.

“Harry doesn’t even like sweets.”

But it was dangerous, the way he could break you.

His lips just barely brushed yours before you pulled back.

“No,” you said.

“What?” Eddie asked, leaning back. “Are you okay?”

All you could think about was Steve. Eddie literally just told you he was happy with Steve and then he was going to, what, kiss you? What business did he have doing that? And what business did you have being a homewrecker?

“I think you should go,” you said sternly, throwing the blanket off and standing.

Eddie looked up at you like he was confused. As if he wasn’t just trying to do something incredibly stupid.

“What? Really?”

You walked over to the opposite end of the living room, desperate to stay the hell away from him. Because there was some part of you that was wondering how stupid kissing him would really be. But maybe if you stayed as far away from him as possible, you wouldn’t be tempted. You couldn’t be. 

“Yep.”

Eddie shook his head, standing. “What just happened here?” he asked. “Like, seriously.”

You shook your head. “I just want you to go, Eddie. Okay?”

“No, not okay. Jesus H Christ,” he huffed, throwing the pillow on the couch. “You can’t just kick me out and not even tell me what I’m doing wrong.”

“You should figure that one out for yourself. You’re probably too high anyway,” you said, maybe a little too bitterly.

“It was only ten milligrams,” he emphasized. “And maybe, just maybe, I need to be given some clear fucking communication.”

“You’ll figure it out.” 

He gave you a hard stare. “Really? Is this really what you’re doing right now?”

“What?” you pushed. “What am I doing?”

Say it, you thought. Eddie, please just say it.

“Maybe you should figure that one out for yourself,” he mocked.

And before you could figure out how to respond, Eddie turned away from you. He stomped over to the kitchen counter, grabbing his keys and wallet before walking towards the door.

“For the record,” he said, turning back to look at you in the eye. “I’m completely sober. You of all people should know I have a high tolerance.”

Eddie opened the door and slammed it right behind him.

Eddie couldn’t stop his thoughts firing at a rapid pace as he nearly sprinted to the van. He was going to pass out, he was so sure of it this time. Hell, he was dying. He had to be dying. There was no way he was going to survive this.

The kiss. The fucking kiss. He was going to kiss you. He was actually going to do it.

Eddie’s fingers trembled as he tried to unlock the driver’s side. But the keys slipped from his fingers, clanging onto the asphalt. 

“Fuck,” he whispered, barely able to fight against whatever was grabbing hold of his throat and tightening its grasp. Shaking his head, he leaned his back against the driver’s side door. “Shit.”

Eddie clutched his chest for real this time, feeling his heart race. The panic was flooding his system, tears pricking at his eyes as he tried to focus on the breeze. The white noise of it moving through the trees. The stupid fucking squirrel nearly getting run over as someone barreled through the speed bumps. Your fucking Halloween socks.

This was going wrong. All of it. Every single last scrap of dignity he had was gone. He blew it. He fucking blew it.

If he was stronger, he would turn back around and bang on your door. Demand that you talk about this and tell you how your shared avoidance was going to be the death of any and all chance at a relationship. Kiss you the way he knew he could, knew he would. 

Because there was no way, no way, that nothing was happening between you two. 

He knew it. You knew it.

If only he was strong enough.

And it was occurring to him that he didn’t feel this way about Steve. If anything, he could never feel this way about him. And, frankly, he was starting to truly understand that it had nothing to do with Steve. It was everyone. He would never be able to feel this way about anyone else.

This time, Eddie couldn’t shake that off.

This time, Eddie knew that something had to change.

You couldn’t help but hope he’d turn back. That he’d walk right back in and kiss you the way you knew he could, knew he would if he wanted you like that. And maybe he did want to kiss you, you couldn’t say. But why would he continue to see Steve, bringing him up in nearly every conversation if he wanted you? What would be the point of that?

You were more confused than ever, finding yourself haunted by the scene playing on the TV behind you.

“What’s the matter with me?” Sally exclaimed.

“Nothing,” Harry said softly.

“I’m difficult!”

“You’re challenging,” he countered.

You fell back on the couch, sobbing as you listened to Harry and Sally go back and forth, nearly taunting you with how fucking accurate it was. How fucking accurate everything around you was, from music to movies and back again. 

“No, no, no! I drove him away!”

This was your fault, and now you had to live with those pesky little consequences you hadn’t thought of. You drove Eddie away and now you had no idea how much longer you had before he would fade into a stranger, a fever dream of what once was. And a reminder of what could’ve been.

[msschemmenti]

hinge - a potential series

eventual melissa schemmenti x reader

synopsis: melissa joins hinge. who will she match with?

a/n: hello yes i know i’ve been gone for over a month after saying i was going to finish some things. my job got SUPER busy! but i’m trying to get back into writing and with that in mind i wanted to do a little writing exercise that i thought could be fun. so basically this will be a one shot series where melissa matches with different readers each installment. i was thinking if you all were interested i could open my requests for descriptions of readers you’d like to see melissa chat with and date! this is just an introductory piece to the vision, but let me know if you all would be interested in submitting readers for this. if not that’s cool as well ahaha! but either way, i hope you enjoy this chaotic prologue.

“You know, you should really get back out there Melissa.” Jacob’s voice floated over Melissa's shoulder. The older woman felt the tension between her eyebrows tighten as she slowly turned to address the young teacher. Not only had he been listening in on her conversation with Barb, but now he was giving advice. She knew they shouldn’t have let him stay for the Christmas dinner, now he thinks he’s a part of their circle. 

"What are ya talking about?" Melissa glared. Jacob had the sense to look a bit squeamish under her gaze but still cleared his throat as if to speak.

"I just mean, it's been months since Gary stopped stocking the vending machine. And kind of disappeared off the face of the Earth. And you're a beautiful woman, who deserves to be treated well. I'm sure there's a sea of men just waiting to make you their wife." Jacob rambled as his face grew red.

"First of all kid, I had nothing to do with Gary's career change and if you tell anyone different we'll have a problem. Second of all, I know I'm hot. I'm a Philly 11. I don't need no man making me his wife. I'm perfectly fine with the way my life is right now. Not that it's any of your business." Melissa scoffed with an eyeroll.

"Well that doesn't mean you can't see what's out there." Janine piped up from her seat next to Jacob.

"Oh you're one to talk, what does that even mean?" Melissa asked.

"Well, I'm not looking for a relationship right now because I'm working on myself. But that doesn't mean I don't want to see who's out there. Or even get a little validation from knowing someone wants me."

Melissa listened curiously, "and how exactly do you do that? Are you going to bars and turning down drinks or something?"

"No! Dating apps. People see my profile and like me but I don't have to say anything back." Janine explained.

"Oh yes! Before I met Zack I had a profile on all of the apps, just to make sure I wasn't missing any of the validation." Jacob added in causing Janine to nod.

"I think that could be good for you." Barb hummed before taking another bite of her salad.

"Not you too!" Melissa groaned before Ava walked through the door swiping on her phone.

"What we talking about?" Ava grinned looking around the tables.

"We're trying to convince Melissa to get back out there. On a dating app."

"Oh you should definitely do that. There's a market of men you're missing out on. Get you a young thing to get all up in that Italian Dressing." Ava said wiggling her eyebrows before reaching to make her coffee.

"Okay. None of that." Melissa groaned as she and Barb shook their heads in disappointment.

"No, you don't have to start out doing that. You can just start out seeing who's out there. Getting some likes, giving some likes, and then if you want to you can move it to chatting. It's all at your own speed." Janine tried to explain.

Before Melissa could even try to continue disagreeing, Ava had finished dumping sugar in her mug and had snatched Melissa's phone from the table. "The question is, what app do we get her on. I think Tinder is out if she's not gonna let any all up in her business. Bumble is dead and boring. What else is there?"

"How about none?"

"Oh Hinge! That ones really good." Jacob volunteered and Ava nodded moving to download the app on the older woman's phone.

"You are insane! Give me back my phone." Melissa tried to lunge at the taller woman.

"Stop fighting girlfriend. Just let it happen." Barbara appeased placing her hand on Melissa's shoulder in an attempt to calm her.

"Oh not you too!" Melissa sighed.

"Give in Schemmenti. I'm already creating your account." Ava grinned flashing the phone toward the older woman.

Seeing the phone, Melissa just shook her head. "I hate all of yous."

Ava took a seat in the middle of the table and smirked over her shoulder at Melissa. "Alright so let's get these questions and pictures together. Gotta show every how hot you are!"

Melissa scoffed but only rolled her eyes in response.

"So I got all the basics, now who are you looking for? Just men? Or are you down for a lil lady action? You seem like you'd know your way around the lady parts." Ava asked.

"Oh my god. You are the WORST!"

"That's not answering my question. You know what, I'll just put it as bisexual for now. Keep your options open. Let's find pictures for the prompts. You have any nudes in here I should be worried about seeing?" Ava asked shielding her eyes playfully.

"No? What kind of lady do you think I am?"

"I don't know. I'm just saying. Okay I already did the first one now the next one is 'As seen on my Mom's fridge', how about this cute picture of you and your blonde sister?"

"Yes that would be cute!" Janine smiled.

"Oh put this picture I secretly took of her crocheting on there. People love crafts!" Jacob said air dropping the photo to Melissa's phone.

"Why are you secretly taking pictures of me?" Melissa glared.

"Oh hush, it's helpful now. Oh a writing prompt, what are your simple pleasures?"

"Food, wine, and the Eagles." Melissa answered quickly.

"Let's say Cooking, wine, and the Eagles. People like cooking." Janine amended.

"Another picture, let's do this cute one with me in the back. That'll really get you some likes. I'm pretty well known around this app."

"Last prompt, the key to your heart?" Janine asked.

"A clean kitchen and an empty stomach." Melissa spoke with a shrug.

"Oh cause you like to cook for people. You're so good at this. Yes." Janine swooned.

"And with that, you're live. Now you just wait for the local baddies to match with you."

As Ava handed the phone, Melissa had no choice but to scroll. Well I guess this is what we're doing now.

"If this ends poorly, all of yous better watch your back."

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

Tonight, Forever, Then, Here And Now - Nikolai Lantsov

Summary: Nikolai Lantsov x Reader circa King Of Scars, at a party, pretending their feelings for each other can be ignored.

Content Warnings: Not Beta/Proof Read.

So like, I stopped writing fanfic content and imagines and stuff a few years back because Wattpad wasn't serving me well and Quotev had drained my morale. The last two years I've been posting fanfic on A03, and that's really just been for me and bestie, and this account was really just so I could post Tolya content for bestie. But I'm like very glad you are enjoying my nonsense the same was she does, and I shall continue to take requests and post my random bs because who knew there was such an audience for it xx

Genya smiles looking you up and down. "You clean up nice," Genya says. You give her a look, and she pretends not to see it. "Please try to look like you're happy to be here."

"I did not ask to be here," you remind her. She gently leans closer, bringing her drink to her lips, to try and hide her whispers.

"We both know there is at least one reason you would like to be here," she whispers.

"Don't," you warn her.

"I haven't seen him yet," she continues, "but from what Zoya said-,"

"I do not want to know what Zoya said about Nikolai," you say a little too quickly. Genya smiles, that knowing smile. "I will tell David that you don't like the new hinges, that you preferred the other ones despite the fact they were less functional, because they were prettier."

"No, you wouldn't," Genya says, but she thinks about it. "Oh you might."

"Yes," you tell her, "I might."

You love Genya, she keeps you sane during such fancy and often long functions, but today she wants to talk about Nikolai, and you cannot talk about Nikolai. You're not sure your heart can take it. You've never been able to hide your feelings for him, not from her at least. But today your feelings feel like they could boil over.

"I hoped you'd look my way eventually," comes a voice you don't know. You realise that in your absentmindedness you must have been looking at someone, and rather than admit you were somewhere else entirely, thinking about Nikolai, you try to conjure a smile.

"Have we met?" You ask, you hate small talk, especially with men like these, the type that will ask you to dance. You really do not feel like dancing.

"May I have this dance," you go to say no, but you realise when the confusion crosses the strangers face it isn't he who asked. You play the question back in your mind, and you know the voice, you'd know it anywhere, you'd know it in a crowded room, you'd know it tired, to quiet or pretending to be someone else, and you know it now.

"Your Highness," you give a curtsey, it's a little joke that no one but Nikolai and Genya seem to understand. Nikolai tries to make his smile look more humble, but the smugness lingers. He offers you his hand.

"Shall we?" he asks. You stare at him, like waiting would make it make more sense. He takes your hand with a smile and throws the stranger a gentle shrug. "I have a tendency to make them short of words." You follow him as he pulls you along, trying to ignore the smirk Genya has. "Dance with me."

"We shouldn't be seen together," is the first sentence you manage to put together. Nikolai just gives an indignant sigh.

"Just, take my arm, and don't look so stiff," he says, pulling you in. You let him, having him hold you close takes away some of the attention from the fact you do not wish to be dancing, for understandable reasons. You don't even want to be here at all.

"I should warn you that I am a terrible dancer," you tell him. He chuckles and you can feel his breath against your skin, and you try not to let your thoughts linger on it.

"It's okay love, no one's going to be watching you," he teases.

"By all means, don't waste your pleasantries on me," you respond. He places a hand on your hip and you try not to jolt from the shock. You'd intended on avoiding him, you'd hoped you could spend the whole night, not having to share a word with him, and now his hands are against you and it's like he has filled up all your senses.

"My eyes are up here," Nikolai whispers, bringing himself close to your ear. You step on his foot and he bites his tongue pretending to not notice. "Ouch," he whispers. "Put your hand on my-,"

"No," you say quickly.

"Can you at least pretend you like spending time with me?" he asks.

"I like spending time with you," you say, looking up to meet his gaze. "But I hate parties, I hate... all of this and people are looking at me, I don't want them looking at me, and we know why they're looking at me, because I am dancing with you. Something else I did not intend to do."

You see one of the court members leaning into whisper to someone you don't recognise and you fight off the groan. Nikolai follows your gaze. "Ah, the rumour mill's already started," he observes.

"Sound less pleased with yourself," you tell him. His grin turns mischievous, and he looks more like the Nikolai you know, underneath all the royal attire and façade. You wish you could smile and just be happy in his company, you wish it was that easy. But it's anything from that easy, and as each day passes it gets more and more complicated. "I've heard the rumours about you."

"Who hasn't?" he asks, tone still filled with good-humour, in spite of how quickly he could have misinterpreted that comment.

"I mean... the other rumours, about you and Zoya," you're teasing him and he knows it.

"Yes, that's why she is so set on finding me a wife," he lets slip the tiredness in his tone.

"Oh, that's why you're insisting on dancing with me," you say, letting him pull you closer. "Not because you couldn't find a date in time."

"You think I couldn't find a date in time?" he asks, mock offended.

"No, I know you could have dates lined up out the door," you say, "so it made me wonder, why you wanted to bother me."

"I'm bothering you, am I?"

"Shut up Nikolai," you look away trying to stop yourself from blushing. He always acts like this, and you always react like this, you should know better.

"I wasn't expecting to see you here," he admits. It sounds like a confession, but you've got not a single clue what he is confessing to.

"You weren't supposed to find me here," you admit, equally honest, equally confessional, but at least you know what you're confessing to, even if he doesn't. You feel your throat drying up as Nikolai pulls you in even closer. "Strong grip," you whisper. He laughs and you can feel the breath moving in his chest as he does. "Anyway, how is the whole wife thing going?"

"Oh please, I had hoped I would be free of that, at least with you," he says.

"Why would I free you from conversing clearly the most important decision you're yet to make as royalty and ruler?" you tease.

"I knew you'd turn on me one day," he whispers, "but this betrayal, this stings."

"Well, Your Majesty, I am just concerned for the royal line," you say, dipping your head in a subtle bow.

"Mind if I cut in?" Zoya asks, approaching the two of you.

"Yes," Nikolai groans but keeps a smile on his face.

"A word," Zoya says, eyeing you.

"When I have a moment?" you ask.

"After your dance?" Nikolai inquires.

"I am not cutting in for you," Zoya tells Nikolai directly, "and no," she looks to you, "not when you have a moment, now."

Zoya pulls you aside. "Now I don't know what I've done to incur the wrath of General Nazyalensky, but I assume I am about to find out," You say, not liking quite how hard the grip on your arm is.

"He needs to find a wife," Zoya states flatly.

"I know," you reply.

"He will not find a wife, with you around taking up his time," Zoya points out. If Zoya were someone else, you'd think this was coming from a place of jealousy, possessiveness, or her own interest in Nikolai. But anyone who knows Zoya enough, knows her one true loyalty, the thing she loves above all else, is Ravka. That is where her intentions lie. She wants what is best for her country, it isn't personal and you know it.

"He sought me out," you tell Zoya.

"And he will do that," she tells you, "over and over, and it gets him no where, he will chase you and it will mean nothing except act as a distraction from what he must do."

"Please, Sobachka or not, Nikolai isn't some... love sick puppy, he is a romantic, and these proposed arrangements do not interest him, but even if there was a deeper reason for that, it would not be me," you state.

Zoya's laugh is tired, and in its own way, cruel. "You exhaust me," Zoya admits. Zoya was all kinds of beautiful, and you know her to be beautiful even in her cruelty, in her viciousness. Zoya was so beautiful in her anger, even in her war, that even as the Storm Witch her beauty is what people remember most about her. You assumed she looked right through you, but she was staring at you now, right at you. And that was the most terrifying. "I suggest, you put aside your naivety and take a walk. Let me do what is necessary, what is best."

"For Ravka?" You ask, tone bleak.

"And for Nikolai," she states, "your own feelings aside, that is what you want, isn't it?"

"You know nothing of my feelings Zoya," you say, more venomous than you'd originally planned.

"I think it is you that knows nothing of your feelings," Zoya says, "now you need some air, don't you?"

"I need some air?" you ask. Zoya looks to the archway leading out of the festivities and into the gardens.

"You need some air," Zoya says again, "or do I need to physically remind you."

Zoya would not use her small science here, not like this, but the threat was filled with a level of sincerity. "I need some air," you reply and take your leave. 'What I really need is a drink,' you think to yourself as you make it past most of the crowd.

"Quick, while no one is looking," comes Nikolai's voice as he pulls you into the shadows.

"What... are you doing?" you ask, biting back any sounds of shock.

"You help me, I help you, isn't this how this goes?" he is being himself again, that Nikolai you know so well, all mischief and planning. You knew Nikolai could escape almost any situation if he wanted to, and if he put his mind to it. Clever as a fox. Sly like one too, you'd often thought.

"I need some air," you say, trying your best to oblige Zoya and her better intentions.

"Mind joining me for a walk in the gardens?" Nikolai asks.

"Would I mind you joining me," you correct him. He smirks.

"You wouldn't mind," he places an arm around you, resting a hand on the lower of your back, "I am such a delight to be around."

He is uncharacteristically quiet as you walk down the path and around the garden. "I am sorry for Zoya," he says finally.

"It's futile to apologise over her," you say, "no one could control her if they tried."

"Perhaps not, but... I do not like the way she talks to you," he says.

"She talks to everyone that way."

"But she shouldn't talk to you like that," he says. You want to ask about why you deserve special treatment, about why he is seeking you out knowing there are things he needs to be doing. But something else catches your thoughts before you can ask either of those questions.

"Were you eavesdropping?" you ask.

"Can royalty really eavesdrop?" he asks, trying to pull that charm he has to cover his tracks.

"Nikolai," you say, sighing.

"Call me Kolya," he says, "like you used to."

You think your heart might just stop in your chest. "I... there is a lot of things I used to say, that it's best if I don't say anymore," you manage, looking up at the sky instead of at him. It's cloudy and dark, the stars barely managing to shine through all the fog.

"Why not?" he asks, genuine, needing to know.

"Because things can't be how they were Nikolai, not anymore, not now," you say, "and you know that better than I do."

"I don't believe that," he says, leaning on the wall. You look at his waistcoat, wondering how it would look if he were to return to the party with the dirt of the garden on his good clothes.

"You need to," you say, stepping to stand beside him, resting your arms on the wall, hands just out of subtle reach of his. He would have to reach for you, intentionally, knowingly, noticeably to take your hand in his. Part of you wants him to, part of you knows he really shouldn't.

"You're really trying to sound convincing aren't you?" he asks.

"I am allowed my fantasies, you cannot afford them," you admit. He smiles, but you can feel the sadness thinly veiled by the smugness.

"So you have fantasies about me?" He cocks his head to give you a look.

"You shouldn't keep them waiting," you say, not giving in to him, as much as you want to.

"I'm royalty, I never keep anyone waiting, they're just too eager," he says. He moves his hand over, just a small amount, considering it as he edges across the stone of the wall. You remind yourself not to hold your breath.

"Nikolai..." you whisper. "You can't do this." You want to tell him that it is not fair, to have loved him all this time, and always known he could never be yours. With him this close the idea that he could, even for a moment is filling your brain with desires and thoughts you've tried hard to bury.

"But what if we did anyway," he asks. "Tell me like I am not what I am, but just who I am, forget the titles and the obligations. If it was not about the rules and Zoya and the parade of princesses and diplomats that I am expected to smile at and charm. If it was just you and I, tell me like it was that."

"Why?" you ask. "What is the point?"

"So I know," he says, "I need to know if I am truly going mad, or if maybe, my dashing charms have won over even you."

"My feelings for you have nothing to do with your charms Nikolai," you smile to yourself, "I fell for you long before you became so boyishly handsome."

"And my heart belonged to you long before I ever thought I could be king," he admits.

"But you did get handsome, and you are King," you say.

"What if," he takes your hand now and the warmth of his hand engulfing yours makes your breath hitch, "we just didn't care about it. What if I told Zoya that she needn't worry with her matchmaking because there is no one I would be willing to rule with that isn't you?"

"I'd say you're a fool, and that only Kings in bed time stories marry for love," you say.

"And I would remind you once said every prince in every fairy tale made you think of me."

"Saints I really used to say things didn't I?"

"I always loved that about you."

"You still say things."

"Say you'll have me," he says, "if you will have me, I will sort the rest."

"And have to dance with you in front of people, I don't think I could do that, you misstep," you tease.

"You stepped on my foot," he chuckles. You look at him, and those eyes are staring right back at you, into you, like he could see exactly who you are at a glance, like he has always known. Like every breath, ever step, has always been leading here, to this moment. "You're leaving me without an answer."

"Nikolai," you whisper, "you're not supposed to make this choice."

"But I want to make it anyway," he says, "I am King, no one will argue with me."

"Zoya will," you say as his hand brushes your cheek.

"Let her try," he says. "So... is that a yes? All I ask is that you say yes if you want to, not because you should or shouldn't but because you want to, and you speak to me as you always have, and call me like you once did."

"Kolya," you whisper, and the softness in your voice is answer enough, but you tell him anyway, "yes."

[mymoonagedaydream]

Part 3

Pairing: Mob!Bucky x y/n

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Language

Part 1 / Part 2

—

The sky was darkening by the time the two of you reached your apartment, streetlamps illuminating one by one and melding with the warm glowing light that spilled from the windows above you. Bucky released the arm that had been firmly anchored around you and took a step back while you rooted around in your bag. He obviously figured that, after the absolute shitshow the last twenty-four hours had been, there was a pretty good chance he wasn’t going to be invited in. You pulled out your keys, letting him sweat right up until the last second.

Before you could unlock the door, however, it swung open to reveal Lily, jarringly backlit by pale, fluorescent bulbs. She looked disappointed.

“Oh, my dear, you’ve just missed them.”

“Who?” You glanced back at Bucky and gave him a reassuring smile, knowing this interaction was bound to put him on edge. “Have your family been visiting?”

“No, your friends. They only left a few minutes ago.”

“My friends?” 

“Yes, the young men with the birthday cards for you. Very sweet. I sent them upstairs but my word they were noisy, they must have had some trouble working out how to use the letterbox.”

Well, now you were on edge too, partly because your birthday wasn’t for another three months and partly because you didn’t have a letterbox.

Before you had the chance to respond, Bucky charged through the gap between you and sprinted up the stairs, swiftly disappearing out of view. You asked Lily to lock the door before racing after him, pausing halfway up the stairs when it hit you that entrusting security detail to her might not have been the best idea. You weren’t even sure if she could remember who did and didn’t live here anymore.

After inwardly deliberating for a second, you shrugged and carried on, deciding that you’d actually quite like to see someone try messing with you while Bucky was nearby and this irate. Might even cheer you up a little.

You were out of breath by the time you reached the top of the stairs, but the sight you were met with somehow still managed to pull the last dregs of air from your lungs. 

Your door was hanging off its hinges. There were splinters of wood littering the hallway and holes of varying sizes punched into the drywall. A vague path of cigarette burns in the carpet led from where you were standing to the spot where your doormat should have been.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in the back of your throat, you slowly approached, tears welling in your eyes as they scanned over the inside of your apartment. It was worse than you could have imagined. The couch had been torn to pieces, the TV screen was smashed, the curtains had been ripped from the wall and strewn over the floor. You dreaded to think how the rest of the place looked and you weren’t sure you had the emotional capacity to find out right now.

Thundering footsteps approached from inside and Bucky stormed into view, his voice more deep and stern than usual as he addressed you.

“They’re gone. I can’t see anything missing but you should check around too.”

“Buck-”

“Fuckin’ cowards, man,” he kicked a nearby couch cushion and stuffing exploded out of it, “couldn’t even stick around to face us.”

“Buck, please.”

A warm tear spilled onto your cheek. He seemed to soften when he spotted it, quickly moving over and pulling you into a tight embrace. You buried your face in the shoulder of his suit jacket, letting a few more drops soak into the rough material, choking back hiccuped breaths. His hand smoothed down the hair on the back of your head.

“I’m sorry, baby. Take as long as you need.”

You turned your head to the side so your voice wasn’t muffled. “Is it bad?”

“It’s fixable.”

“Are you lying to make me feel better?”

“A little,” he took hold of your hands and gently prized them away from his chest, squeezing them firmly as he moved into your eyeline, “but we’ll do it together, okay? S’gonna be alright. C’mon.”

With a deep breath, you finally stepped into your devastated apartment and looked around. Some things were fixable. Most things weren’t. Slowly, tenderly, Bucky led you from room to room and helped you find all your valuables. Your laptop was still in your bedside drawer, camera still on your desk, even the emergency twenty dollar bill you kept in the key bowl by the front door was still there. It was bizarre, but you were actually starting to feel a little relieved- that was, until you walked through to the kitchen.

You spotted it immediately. Your grandmother’s necklace, the one that had hung from the corner of her picture on the wall ever since you’d moved in, was gone. You were in disbelief. It wasn’t even valuable, it was just a brass locket with a photograph of your grandfather inside, why the fuck would anyone take that?

You spun round and pointed it out to Bucky. If you’d been in a less disoriented state of mind, you might have noticed how his face dropped into something resembling dread, how his jaw suddenly clenched and his eyes squeezed shut, but you were far too busy spiralling. 

“Christ, I haven’t even called the cops. I don’t even know what crime this is. Destruction of property? Vandalism? Shit burglary?” Your shaking hands pulled your cellphone from your pocket. “Who the fuck would even do this? You think it could be that guy that was following me before?”

“No.”

“It makes sense, I mean he must have been working for someone, maybe they-” Your train of thought came to an abrupt stop as you realised what he’d said. “What d’you mean, no? Buck, do you know something about this?”

“No, I swear. It’s just- something my brother said earlier. It’s been bothering me. ”

“What did he say?”

“I might be overthinking it.”

“Buck. Tell me.”

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “Most of the conversation was fine, really, I just told him about how much of an ass I’d been and how guilty I felt and he nodded along. But after we’d spoken, just before he left the room, he said, doesn't she know it’s a dangerous city for a girl all on her own?”

You felt the blood turn cold in your veins. 

Bucky’s brother had only ever been to your apartment once, a long time ago, when he dropped off your invitation to his wedding. The hairs on the back of your neck stood up as you vividly recalled him sipping coffee from your favourite mug and asking about the picture of your grandmother hung up in the kitchen. He listened intently while you reeled off all the reasons you idolised her, even putting a comforting hand on your shoulder when you told him how much you missed her. A pinprick of white hot rage started in your stomach, slowly expanding and filling your whole chest.

“That motherfucker.”

“I can’t believe he’d do something like this,” Bucky looked genuinely shellshocked, “I thought I could trust him. I’m so sorry, I-”

“Jesus, would you stop fucking apologising?" 

The air between you stilled. It seemed like neither of you had been expecting such an abrupt snap, but you knew he needed to hear this, so you swallowed back your hesitation and continued.

"You know who they are. You know what they do. How the hell is this a shock?”

“They also know how I feel about you. This isn’t how we treat family.”

“Oh, come on.” You were doing your best not to scream at him. “How many fucking times have we been told that I’ll never be accepted as part of your family? Well, now we’ve been shown, too. I don't feel like waiting around to find out what's next.”

“Nothing’s next, cause I’m gonna sort it out.”

You scoffed. “You’re gonna stand up to them?”

“Of course I am.”

“Whatever.”

You walked out of the kitchen, quickly wiping away your frustrated tears before he saw them. You needed to busy yourself or you’d end up doing a Bucky and punching the fucking wall. Dodging shattered pieces of table and couch, you made your way over to the TV and crouched down, starting to gather shards of smashed screen from the floor. He appeared after just a few seconds. His face was flushed and every visible muscle was tensed, a few beads of sweat starting to form just below his hairline. 

“I’m gonna make this right, I just need to think.” 

“The fuck is there to think about?”

“Well, y’know, I need to, to figure out- Fuck.” 

He let his arms go limp at his sides, looking utterly defeated. Noticing what you were doing, he picked up a blanket from the floor and shuffled over, crouching beside you and emptying the sharp pieces from your hand into the soft material. You didn’t look at him.

“I don’t know what to do. My head feels like it’s falling apart. I’ve got a helluva lot of shit to sort out, I know that, but for now all I care about is that you’re not safe here.”

“No shit. What gave it away, the lack of a front door or the visits from your insane family?”

He placed the blanket down. “Look, I know you hate me right now, and you have every reason to, but I need you to stay at my apartment tonight.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“You don’t have to talk to me or even look at me, just let me make sure you’re somewhere safe.”

You spent a minute thinking about it whilst picking tiny splinters of glass out of your palm, but eventually gave a reluctant agreement. What the fuck else were you gonna do? You couldn’t stay here with no door and an increasingly unhinged downstairs neighbour, and you sure as hell couldn’t afford a hotel room for any significant length of time. Besides, even with him there, Bucky’s apartment would probably be the only place you’d feel secure enough to actually sleep.

He called a cab while you packed, collecting all your remaining valuables and yanking your clothes out of the wood pile that used to be a rickety chest of drawers. Both of you stayed quiet during the journey. The city rolling past the window became gradually less and less dilapidated, crumbling apartment blocks replaced by upscale residences and gleaming metal infrastructure, a whole different world than the one you were used to. Bucky’s world.

You hadn’t been to his apartment for a while, but it was still just as ridiculously opulent as you remembered. You dropped your bag on the floor and glanced around. Between working and seeing you, he never really spent any time here, so obviously never felt the need to properly decorate. It was sterile, like an overpriced showhome. 

He set you up on the squeaky, white leather couch, flicking on the TV and wrapping you in a blanket before ordering takeout. You listened to him rushing around out of view, marching between the bedroom and the bathroom, running water and spraying cleaning products. You let slip an exhausted chuckle at the cacophony of panicked noises. 

One thing you didn’t hear, however, was him picking up the photograph of him and his brother that he kept propped up on the bedroom mantelpiece. You didn’t hear him fold it in half and you didn’t hear the heavy breath that escaped from his lips as he tore it into two clean pieces.

He eventually reappeared and collapsed into the armchair to your left. The TV was blaring but he somehow managed to ignore it, instead staring at the wall all night, deep in thought and slowly tapping his fingers against the leather upholstery. 

He was definitely planning something, you just hoped to god it was something rational.

---

Story taglist: @mdpplgtz03​

Permanent Taglist: @touchstarvedforbuckybarnes​ @sjsmith56​ @supraveng​ @thewackywriter​ @coffeebooksandfandom​ @littlemiss-yeehaw​@buckystevelove​ @happinessinthebeing​ @steeph-aniie​ @nialiuwanderlust​@froggyloora​ @nervousstrangersandwich​ @i-loveyoubutyourenotmine​ @pono-pura-vida​ @crzyplantladyvibes​ @vickie5446 @cremebruleequeen​ @wthisbucky​ @marvel-wifey-86 @alesabisou @blueraspberryreader @casa-boiardi​

Untaggables are italicised, will be removing after a few attempts so let me know if spelling is wrong.

—

[realisticjupiter]

Hii :)

can I request some domestic fluff? I would really like to read Chishiya as a dad and married to the reader, there's barely any Chishiya!Dad content 😔

I LOVE UR WRITING SM BTW, I've read all your work, and I love the way you write Chishiya <333

Hope you have a good day :)

Summary: Chishiya tries to learn to never take his family for granted.

Pairing: dad!chishiya x mom!reader

Genre: Fluff , slight angst

Warnings: angst (it's barely noticeable! I couldn't help myself..), the daughter doesn't have a specific name (I never liked naming kids in fics) lmk if anything else

Word count: 731

a/n: thank you so much for requesting!! I don't think I've ever actually seen dad!chishiya so this was fun to write :). I hope this is good enough to your liking and I'm glad you like my work--have a good day!!!

Chishiya walked into the door as quietly as he could, his keys clinking together as he shut the door behind him.

Of course he didn't want to make either of you wake up, for many reasons. One of them being that he solely just, didn't want to deal with it.

He found himself staying later at work because the thought of coming home almost made him a type of sad he couldn't explain. It made his stomach hurt as if he needed a hug but the thought of someone's touch made his head dizzy.

Home was supposed to be an escape from work, but work turned into an escape for home. Chishiya wasn't sure how he did it, or how he managed to convince himself work was better. It wasn't.

The creak that was made from the rusted hinges on the bedroom door made him cringe. His sock covered feet rustling against the carpet as he made his way inside, looking towards the bed, taking a double take to look at the bodies laid underneath the covers.

Your body lies still next to the smaller one, a hand placed on the small of the child's back as your other hand continues to fidget with the short locks of hair.

He watched your hand make lazy movements against the child's scalp, making him smile at the endearing sight before him; unable to pull away his gaze nor his thoughts.

You peeked open a single eye to look at the figure standing in the darkness. "You're home." You whispered softly.

"Mhm," Chishiya hummed in reply, finally turning away his gaze to walk away. Wanting to change into more comfortable clothing.

You pulled away from the small girl beside you to sneak out of bed, following Chishiya towards the walk-in closet.

He raised a brow when he heard you closely behind him, confused why you'd rather be around him than to peacefully sleep.

"Is everything okay with you?" You whispered, flicking on the light as he removed his white coat.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" He answered, letting his coat fall to the ground with the clink of his name tag.

"I don't know.." You shrugged, walking towards him with uneasy steps.

He turned around to face you as you slid your palms through the opening of his untucked shirt, his breath hitched at the touch but his entire body melted into it.

"You've been distant, Chishiya." You admitted, avoiding eye contact as you looked down at your hands that hid beneath the blue scrubs.

He thought about his next words, afraid of any negative reaction you could give him by just two simple words.

"I'm sorry." Two words he never said often; often as in ever. Maybe once or twice through your relationship but never as meaningful as the way they slipped past his lips in the softest whisper he could.

Your eyes met his glassed over ones, unsure if it was because he was exhausted or about to cry.

"It's okay." You assured him, bringing your hands away from his stomach. But, before he could miss the soft touch, your hands rested on either side of his face.

He wanted to speak but kept his silence to linger in the moment with your thumbs tracing light circles on his cheeks.

"Daddy?" The young girl voiced from behind you, obviously tired by her tiny yawn and her fingers that clawed at her eyes.

He looked at you, as if to ask for permission to pull away from the addicted touch. You smiled at him and pulled your hands away to turn around and watch the young girl run towards Chishiya with open arms.

He bent down to bring her into his embrace, picking her up to hold her against his chest. "Tired?" He hummed to her, but his eyes on you as if the question was also aimed at you.

You nodded before the young girl could disagree with a mumbled no against his shoulder.

You laughed as she attempted to fight off her sleep, but when he passed her over to you so he could finish changing; she was passed out in your arms.

The smallest interaction with his family made him realize how much he missed your soft touch. The realization he hasn't felt your hands around his skin in what felt like ages made his heart hurt.

Nevertheless, he'd never take you for granted again.

reposts and comments are appreciated <3

[xypherz]

Six Rooms

Details: Cole Cassidy x Reader, GN!Reader, fluff, 1.2k words

Warnings: A single curse word, mention of anxiety and reader insecurity, not proofread.

Being a recalled Overwatch hero isn’t easy. Omnic crises and vigilantes are enough to burn anyone out. Though you’re trained to handle situations like these, you need an escape. Some respite to ease your constant stress. 

This is not what you had in mind. 

You planned for a night in. A night all to yourself with no distractions. Sure, there are the other heroes around, but no mission, no omnics, no expectations, is all you wanted.

You planned to have your own room. Your own bed.

You did not account for someone being shoved into what you thought was your escape.

In the bathroom when it happened, you were just setting up essentials like your toothbrush and soaps, when you heard the door to your room being opened, followed by a deep grunt, and a small British voice.

“6 rooms, 7 of us, sorry!!”

The door slammed shut before you could even process what little information you were given. 

Contemplating if you wanted to sleep in the bathtub to preserve your mental solitude, you decided to check who invaded your space, voluntarily or otherwise. The hinges of the bathroom door made an uncomfortable squealing noise as you opened it to the rest of the room.

This is a sick joke.

Not only were you met with the man who had tripped your hopeless romantic heart down the stairs, but he was dressed down.

Cole Cassidy in a t-shirt and jeans? This was simultaneously the best and worst day of your life.

“Hey there, sorry to intrude, I wasn’t given much of a choice in the matter. You’d think I have some advantage on Tracer, but damn, she is stronger than she looks.”

You nodded, voice getting caught in your throat. You’d talked to Cassidy plenty of times, hell, you consider him a friend, but this is too different. You’d never really spoken with him outside of work in private. It’s always on a mission or with others.

“I can sleep in Reinhardt’s room if you’re not comfortable,” he said, voice seeming gentle when not muffled by commands and gunshots.

“No,” you replied, a bit too fast for your liking, “I’m okay with you staying in here, I just wasn’t expecting visitors.”

“Sorry for that, I wasn’t told about the room situation until a few minutes ago. I offered to stay in Reinhardt’s room in the first place, but Tracer insisted.”

“Not your fault, don’t worry about it,” you said sheepishly, eyes trailing to the elephant in the room. Cassidy’s eyes follow yours to the bed. Singular. 

“I’ll sleep on the floor, don’t worry your pretty head over it,” he said, offering a small smile while making his way to the open spot in front of the bed with his bag.

“No, I can’t let you do that, there’s no way that’ll be comfortable.”

“I’d rather the discomfort over yours.”

“I’ll be fine, really,” you said. Though you were aware of Cassidy’s chivalry, you didn’t want him to be in physical pain for your sake.

“I’m not letting you sleep on the floor.”

“Well…” you trailed off, knowing the two of you were too stubborn to let the other be uncomfortable, “We can just share.”

His expression morphed into that of surprise, “I wouldn’t want to intrude more-”

“Cassidy,” you cut him off mid-sentence, “It’s okay, really.”

He resisted the urge to ask for reassurance again, “Okay, then. But if you need me to leave at any point, you can push me onto the floor,” he joked, lightening the awkward tension.

“You got it,” you smiled and walked to your bag, grabbing a set of pajamas and walking to the bathroom. Suddenly the weight of what you had proposed settled in when you looked in the mirror. You were going to sleep in the same bed with someone. Cole Cassidy, no less. The man you’ve been silently, or maybe not so silently to the other heroes, pining over for however long you’ve known him.

Maybe you did want to sleep in the bathtub.

You finished changing, brushing your teeth, and silently calming your anxieties and left the bathroom to see Cassidy was already changed. Any thought of how good he looked in jeans was replaced by how good he looked in boxers. He passed you as he walked to the bathroom while you approached the queen bed in the center of the room. Sitting under the covers, you decided to distract yourself until you were tired enough to sleep.

It was hard to distract yourself when Cassidy joined you in the surprisingly small bed. Maybe it was just the difference between it and his stature that made it seem small. Maybe it was your anxiety closing in on you.

“You sure you’re okay with this?” Your thoughts were interrupted by Cassidy’s concerned question. 

“You’d be pushed on the floor by now if I weren’t,” you joked, though truthfully, it wasn’t far off. Had it been anyone else, you’d have been completely okay with them sleeping on the floor while you enjoyed your personal space. But it wasn’t anyone else.

He smiled a bit at your statement, though it seemed unsure. He leaned over to the bedside table and turned off the lamp.

“Goodnight Y/N.”

You were still sitting up in the bed, staring into nothing as he laid down, his back turned to you.

“Hey, Cassidy?” Your voice came out before you could stop it.

He turned a bit to look at you, “Yeah? You okay?”

“Yeah, I just…” you trailed off, “Sorry, I’m just thinking too much.”

“What’s on your mind?” He sat up fully, staring into the darkness with you.

“Why are you so nice to me?” Though you couldn’t see it, you felt his eyes turn to you. The anxieties you’d been staving off seemed to catch up to you. “I mean, I guess you’re nice to everyone, but… I don’t think I deserve it.” 

“I think if anyone deserves it, it’s you.”

You turned your head toward him, knowing his eyes were on you as well, but the space was too dark to see.

“Why?” The question held a lot of weight. Why had he asked you so many times if this situation was okay? Why had he refused to let you be uncomfortable? Why was he willing to sacrifice his own comfortability just for yours? Why did he always stay by your side during missions? Why did he help you through broken limbs and bullet holes? He didn’t need to do any of it.

So why?

He didn’t respond for what felt like too long.

“You think too much,” he said softly, lightly grabbing your jaw and pulling you closer to him. 

He waited. He waited for you to pull back. He waited for any signal that what he was doing wasn’t okay. Instead, you leaned forward, placing your hand at the back of his neck before pressing your lips against his. The kiss was sweet. It was slow with no expectations.

You pulled back a bit, the darkness making it easier to find your voice, “I definitely think too much.”

----

Your bag seemed way too heavy so early in the morning. 

You walked out the door ahead of Cassidy, turning the corner to head to the lobby. Reinhardt and Tracer were in front of you, halfway there already. A door opening made you turn your head, Mercy and Genji walking out of a room. 

“Didn’t we have 6 rooms?” you thought, when the realization dawned on you, “Well played, Tracer.”

[missdawnandherdusk]

The Auror

The Case The Defendant The Witness

Summary: How did your end of course trial get to tangled up with the people you knew through school? And why the hell was Harry Potter the one it depended on?

A/n: Okay, so you guys have a choice bc I have the next chapter ready... do you want it now or in a couple days? It's more Draco and a little more angst... Love you guys and let me know that you think!

I walked into the Auror’s office of the Ministry and talked briefly with the secretary at the front desk before being told two office numbers. One of Nymphadora Tonks, one of Harry Potter. 

I knocked on her door and heard a fumbling before I met a smiling face and wild pink hair. 

“Y/n? What are you doing here kid?” Tonks asked. “It’s good to see you!” 

“It’s good to see you too!” I smiled brightly. “I’m here on a case. I need the ballistics for Draco Malfoy’s wand. And the wand if you still have it just to confirm anything.” 

“Oh, you’re the one that got the Malfoy case,” Tonks said. 

“If I had a galleon for every time I heard that,” I joked. 

“Oh I’m sure. The case has been a total mystery. Glad they finally found someone to take it. Come on in kid, I’ve got the file around here somewhere.”

“Thanks,” I shut the door behind me.

Her office was both neat and a mess. Tonks had trinkets everywhere and scattered maps and memories lying about but her desk was completely orderly. She was rifling through an old filing cabinet, her arm reaching down into a space that physically wasn’t there, but with magic, existed. 

“So Malfoy huh?” She asked. “He’s a looker isn’t he?” She grinned. 

“Tonks,” I laughed. “Absolutely not. This is a job that’s all.” 

“It can be both.” She mused. 

“I’m not going to fancy a potential murder,” I clarified. 

“So you think he did it?” Her face became serious. 

“I don’t know. It’s why I need the balliectis. Something just isn’t adding up and it’s driving me crazy.” 

“Yeah, I never did hear why the case was never closed. I thought the wand results spoke for themselves.” She finally pulled out a folder and a long slim box. “Here we are.” She opened the folder, setting the box on her desk. “Here we have it. This wand did not cast any Unforgivable Curses. Not now, not ever.” Tonks handed me the file. 

“You’re sure?” I glanced between her and the paper, trying to make sense of all the numbers and words of jargon that I didn’t quite understand. 

“Clear as day darlin’,” She nodded. “This wand did not kill Dumbledore.” 

I stared at the hawthorn wand, held captive but areas of grey, missing it’s wielder. It begged me for freedom. 

“Actually, I think it says it there somewhere, but Draco was disarmed by Potter some years ago and hasn’t had the wand ever since.” Tonks stole the papers from my hands. “Yeah here. 1998 at the Manor… looks like Easter of that year,” 

“Easter? At the Manor?” I frowned. 

“Yeah, is that important?” She asked. 

“It keeps coming up,” I mused. “So Draco hasn’t had this wand since?” 

“As far as I know, he hasn’t had any wand since,” Tonks said handing the file back. “You keep this. Does more good for you than it does me, sitting here collecting dust.” 

“What about the wand?” I asked. 

“I can’t sign that off until the case is closed.” She said. “Sorry kid,” 

“No, this is… this is more than enough,” Hope fluttered in my chest. “Thank you Tonks,” 

“Any time kid,” She grinned. “And hey, don’t be a stranger,” 

“I won’t,” I promised. “But I do have another meeting to get to,” I said.

“Yeah, yeah, get outta here,” Tonks laughed. “And say hi to your folks for me,” She called as I went down the hall. 

“I will!” I waved, rounding the corner. 

I followed the halls for a bit, searching for the office number that had the person this entire case was hinging on. 

“Auror Potter.” I held my hand out and Harry shook it. “Thank you for meeting with me.”

“Of course. I heard that you’re on the Malfoy case.” He led me into his office and we sat surrounded by strewn papers and growing piles of books and various magical items that’s looked semi dangerous. 

“I am.” I said, moving a few files off the spare seat in the room. I set them precariously on another stack of papers that threatened to tumble. 

“So, he’s guilty then, yeah?” Harry said, hopeful. 

“Um.” I said. “Never mind that. Tell me, what do you have invested in this case. I didn’t see a witness statement or any official documentation. But Dr. Dresden said you were the reason this case wasn’t closed.”

“I am.” Harry said confidently. “Because Malfoy killed Dumbledore.” He said it so confidently, like a lion strutting about. 

“Okay,” I pulled out my notebook and quill. “Did you see him kill Dumbledore?”

“No.” Harry didn’t seem less confident despite the fact. “But I was there.”

“How could you have been there and not seen Draco kill Dumbledore?” I asked. 

“I was just below. We were in the astronomy tower you see, and Malfoy was there. I heard him and Dumbledore talking. Malfoy said ‘I’m going to kill you.’ Then Bellatrix and a few other death eaters rushed in and they insisted that it was only Draco who could kill Dumbledore and those were the orders from the Dark Lord himself. Then Snape was there and Dumbledore was dead.” 

“Okay so there was intent.” I mused. “But that doesn’t mean Draco actually did it.”

“How could it not have been him?” Harry said getting heated pushing back from his desk standing. “Do you think I’m lying?”

“No,” I said calmly. “Please, sit.” Harry simmered down, his eyes narrowed in skepticism. “Did you hear Draco cast the killing curse?”

“Malfoy killed Dumbledore.”

“That’s not what I asked.” I said firmly. “Did you hear Draco cast the killing curse?"

“Are you daft!? Malfoy killed Dumbledore! I was there!” Harry stood abruptly, causing a cascade of clutter. I stood as well, seething. 

“Auror Potter if you cannot conduct yourself in a proper manner we are done here and all of your words will be stricken from the record and you will not be relevant to this case.” I said coldly. “Now would you like to answer my questions or are we done here?” 

Harry fumed with rage, locking his jaw. He looked downright dangerous but I wasn’t afraid. I had a job to do. 

“No.” Harry bit out. 

“No what?” I asked. 

“No. I didn’t heard Malfoy cast the killing curse.” He spat the words like acid at my feet. 

“Thank you.” Was all I could say. 

“If you acquit Malfoy—“ He began to threaten. 

“I’ll be freeing an innocent man.” I vowed. “Otherwise he is guilty.” My eyes narrowed. “And I intend to find out which.” There was nothing else I wanted from him. “Thank you for your time.” As I went to leave I heard his voice. 

“He’s a killer Y/n. Don’t let him fool you.” 

I turned back, pensive. There was something in his eyes. A heavy fury. A cold weight. 

The man in front of me was a killer. He had destroyed Voldemort. 

“I can see quite clearly.” I said, storming from his office. By the time I had calmed myself down, time snuck up on me. It was a quarter past noon. 

I had told Draco I’d be there at noon. 

“Shit.” I took breath and drew my wand, aperating to the Manor. I flew up the front steps and knocked on the door. Draco was there waiting for me. 

.

The Confession

.

masterlist

.

@coffee-addicti @msmcsmutt @ravn-87 @artemismohr18@whygz@crazywritingbug @bitemebro522 @zombiesnips-blog@savingdraco  @akari180 @slytherin-emerald @queenfeatherwings @fanficflaneuse @go-whovian-universe @spicyshenanigans @darling-im-not-okay-i-promise @katsukink @takemetothekingdom @strangerr-things @tmnt-queen@hxneybgb @belcvayelena @moviesbooksandfandoms   @cocochanelthepupper @ninacotte @braelynn-johnston  @jiggllyy @darcypotter-blog  @thiccheerioss@lottie289 @beautiful-pegasus@tceedlmao @anonymous034 @bi-andready-tocry @dragonsandbread @the-queen-of-hell-things @alienmotel  @oh-itsnothing @sunflowerxsadnessw @fattycooter @fanficsigottaread @gweaslvy @strawberriesonsummer @gaysludge @ray-of-sunrise @artist-bby @shadowsingeraxolotl @quillsareforwriting @wollymalfoy @lilpieceoftoast @paper-cats @floweryjh @hufflautia @livize75 @annie-mcl @riathearora @dudeimnotgonnakms @auriuswolve @carolineesnell

[wooahaes]

mm, i got a really big problem...

pairing: non-idol...? mark lee x fem!reader

genre: comedy? fluff.

word count: ~0.7k

warnings: an apartment door nearly gets knocked off its hinges based on how loudly it was opened.

daisy’s notes: haha! you thought this was over! now its over for real i promise. (its midnight for me hehe)

At exactly midnight, the door to your apartment was probably broken now.

To paint the scene more clearly: you, the birthday girl of the day, had been curled up in your bed... alone, because your boyfriend had been away for work. Despite the way he had pouted at you the day before he left (”I can take you with me, just hide in my luggage, they won’t know--” after his attempts to fly you with them separately didn’t work because you also had work), Mark had grown more... okay, in a sense, that he wouldn’t physically be there with you for your birthday. The two of you had already decided you’d have a make-up date after he came back (which was supposed to be tonight, since midnight had struck) and rested up. It genuinely didn’t bother you at this point: his work was important to him, and he wasn’t the one in control of when he had to leave and come back. Hell, he was supposed to be back on your birthday, the birthday date being later was because you knew he’d be exhausted.

So when your apartment door suddenly burst open with the force of someone trying to break in, your first thought was, pretty reasonably, “Oh, fuck, someone just broke into my apartment, I should get ready to run and call the cops.”

Except thirty seconds later, your bedroom door flung open to, and you were met with the face of your panicked boyfriend. “Did I make it?! It was, like, two minutes to midnight when I got here and I, like, booked it up the stairs, bro.”

You merely stared at Mark at first, processing what the hell just happened. Because, truly, what the fuck just happened.

“Baby?” He said amidst all the huffing and puffing--how fast did he book it up the stairs? “Did I miss it?”

All you could do was look at your phone, time clicking on to reveal it was not only past minute, but barely a few minutes past midnight. Wordlessly, you held your phone up, and saw the devastation on his face.

“No! Oh my god. I thought we had time,” he made his way over to you. “I got an earlier flight and everything. Aw, man...”

Finally, you found your voice. “Mark... What the hell?”

He sat down at the foot of your side of the bed. “Okay. So... We got an earlier flight. Or, well, I mean I did... and so did a couple of the guys to make sure I didn’t die on my way here, although Donghyuck said he’d be there to comfort my widowed girlfriend if I did die on my way here--” Sounded like him. His flirting with you (and your boyfriend, to be fair) never stopped since you and Mark had never been bothered by what was clearly a joke. “--and I was gonna come surprise you and be like ‘I made it!’ but I didn’t, so now the surprise is kinda ruined even if it does mean I’m back here now--”

Instead of letting him continue to ramble about how he missed you, something he always did when returning from trips, you just pulled him in to kiss his stupidly cute face. He merely smiled into it, kissing you back immediately. When he drew back, you could see the way his eyes were glimmering.

“Hi, baby,” he giggled. “I know I’m late, but happy birthday. I’m home.”

“Mark, you nearly broke the fucking door!” Someone called from the living room. The two of you shared a look, and he grew more flustered.

“Also... I may have ditched my bags on the stairs. And I think Chenle was already following me up since I forgot some of my shit in the car, so...”

You giggled, planting a quick peck against his lips. “Go take care of things,” you said. “I’ll be here when you get back.”

He started to move, only to turn back, smiling as he kissed you one more time. “I love you,” he said. “I’m glad I’m home.”

You were, too.

taglist: @twancingyunhao​

[thatorigamiguy]

Vacuum

Nora: "Hey Jaune-Jaune?"

Jaune's dog ears perk up, and he looks up from the sword fencing book he was studying to look at Nora.

Dog Faunus Jaune: "What's up Nora?"

Nora: "So, I know you tend to get scared during major thunderstorms, but do you get upset when someone uses a vacuum? and I'm only asking out of genuine concern, I swear!"

Jaune snickers at Nora's nervous look, before giving her a reassuring smile.

F! Jaune: "I knew what you meant Nora, and I'm not offended."

At this, Jaune tilts his head to the left as he thinks her question over.

F!: Jaune: "Mmmh the vacuum huh? I don't have to much of an issue with it to be honest. Most Canine Faunus don't really either, at best we get annoyed at the constant humming but other than that we tune it out."

Nora: "Great! Because I'm getting ready to run one real quick since it's been a couple weeks and I just wanted to make sure you're okay with it!"

Jaune waved her off with a go ahead as he went back to his book. Nora quickly set the Vacuum up and as she stepped on the pedal it roared to life. It was at this moment that the door to their dorm room was blown off it's hinges as one Ruby Rose bursts in holding Crescent Rose in her hands with a death grip. He wolf ears were twitching, her silver eyes filled with fear and panic as she started shouting.

Wolf Faunus Ruby: "WHO HAS ACTIVATED THE DEVILS INSTRUMENT?! THE HUMMING! THE MADDENING HUMMING! THEY FILL THE AIR WITH THEIR INUMANE SHRIEKING! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"

At her mad ramblings, Ruby began to wildly fire into the room as she tried to snuff out vacuum from the safety of the doorway. She nearly caught Nora with a stray round before Jaune had dive tackled her to the floor and they both crawled behind the kitchen counter. Nora peaked out over the counter in terror, before looking at Jaune with questioning look. Jaune met her look with an indifferent look and a shrug.

F! Jaune: ""I did says that 'most' Canine get annoyed at 'best."

F! Ruby: "DIE MONSTER, FOR YOU DON'T BELONG IN THIS WORLD!"

[yunjardi]

my heart bel♡ngs to daddy [series]

[young sugar daddy jake x fem.reader au]

--------------------------------------------

click here for this series's masterlist to read previous chapters, general warnings, and playlist

[‼️chapter warnings‼️: smut [mdni], angst, DADDY KINK, angst, crying, unprotected sex, jake being a bit pervy, car sex, oral, fingering, riding, cockwarming, mentions of food/eating, pls lmk if i missed anything!]

*sorry for any grammar errors

--------------------------------------------

-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-

chapter 9: the healing process

"since when was it october?" you asked yeji as you fiddled with your black bunny ear headband that became a part of your work uniform that "updated" itself into a black skin-tight mini dress instead of the regular low-cut shirt. since halloween was just around the corner, they wanted every woman employee in a slutty halloween costume to 'attract customers.' "since a week and a half ago, y/n. jake really is warping your sense of reality, isn't he?" yeji joked as she pulled on a strand of your hair, causing you to swat her hand away in playful yet mildly annoyed manner. "okay fine," you sighed in defeat, "i'll admit that he's been distracting the fuck out of me lately, especially since we had our first argument not long ago. i mean, we kinda made up but it's still fresh in my mind." yeji tapped her nails on the marble counter of the bar with an evil smile on her face.

"you know, if he was really fazed by you being with any other guy but him to the point where you two literally had some kind of argument, maybe you should A. just become a couple or B. ditch his ass for being too protective over you. but i say you go with A," yeji remarked as she tossed a dishrag into the basket of dozens of other dish towels that were waiting to be put in the washing machine. "ugh," you groaned, "you see, it's not as easy as it seems." yeji raised an eyebrow at your response. "how so? he's clearly in love with you and we all know you also love-"

"hush!" you snapped, "don't say the 'L' word, yeji! that's not a thing! especially not with jake and i! he's just doing his job as a sugar daddy while i hold up the other end of the bargain. you know how that stuff works." she sighed sarcastically and tapped her nails on counter again. "denial," yeji said in a singsong tone, "someone's being moody again today."

yeji always noticed how moody and snappy you became when she brought up how you and jake should make things official, but she noticed changes in your mood in general lately. she figured it was just the nerves getting to you about your whole situation with

"okay, i'm sorry." you sighed again, "i didn't mean to snap at you. i just haven't been able to think clearly since jake and i fought. it's supposed to be a good thing that we have a bit of a wedge in between us because i don't wanna get too attached, but why do i feel so bad? like i said, i think we already kinda made up and everything. i literally haven't seen him since then, but it feels like it's still haunting my mind and it hurts so bad."

yeji played with strands of your hair as you rambled. "you told me not to say it," yeji said sarcastically. you groaned and rolled your eyes.

"ugh, and i shouldn't even be thinking of him right now! we have fall exams coming soon and i cannot let jake distract me," you realized in the midst of your blabbering. yeji groaned at your mention of exams as she let go of the strands of your hair.

just then, the bells that were attached to the top hinge of the door jingled, signifying that someone just walked in. "oh," yeji said as she looked over at the door, "speak of the devil; your little 'distraction' is here." before you could turn your around, you were already met with the sensation of being hugged from behind.

"y/n... i've missed you so much," jake said softly as he cozied his cheek on your bare shoulder, his cold skin from the weather outside sending shivers down your body. "i still feel really bad about how i treated you that night," he admitted glumly, "can i make it up to you?" he placed a kiss on your cheek as a shy smile formed on your face. though you didn't exactly know what he entailed when he said he wanted to 'make it up to you,' you, as much as you desperately wanted to deny it, really wanted to spend time with him.

you couldn't help but notice the customers looking at you and jake's close interaction, thankfully most of their eyes being fixated on jake's face rather than yours; they looked at him in a way that you'd look at a familiar face. did some customers know him or something? maybe that's just how rich people are; scoping out "competition."

either way, the two of you seemed like a fake couple who looked married from the perspective of the general public, which made you feel all sorts of mixed emotions that you couldn't even begin to understand. seeing him and feeling his touch for the first time in what felt like ages only made you more confused about your feelings. you couldn't lie; you still felt a sting in your heart when you looked at him because of what happened between the two of you but at the same time, you still felt glad that he took time out of his day to see you.

"my puppy. so sweet as usual," you couldn't help but gush unintentionally as you snaked your arm around him to play with his hair, "but i'm working right now, jake. my break is soon, so i promise i'll spend time with you then." you felt his face turn pouty against your shoulder when you told him that you had to work. heck, he literally came to visit you at your job.

"i'll sit here and wait for you to be done," jake said with a smile as he sat on a barstool, sitting and waiting there the way a puppy would wait for its owner. you let out a satisfied sigh as you subconsciously smiled, yeji elbowing you with a cheeky grin on her face, making you shoot her a wide-eyed look that screamed 'hush!' and then continued work as usual as if jake wasn't sitting off to the side waiting for your break to come.

customers came and went, ordering simple menu items like rounds of soju shots, spirits, and various wines, but jake always seemed to have his eyes glued to you when you fake-flirted with customers in order to seduce them into giving you tips; it made his jealously perk up again though he didn't want to admit it.

you may have a sugar daddy, but you still couldn't put away your pride and just let him handle all the things in your life that involved money. you wanted to prove to yourself that you weren't completely reliant on him; that you only wanted him for the material things that he gave you and not because you were desperate for money or the attention of a man. if anything, you didn't even have to work or go to school at all anymore with all the money he gives you for simply existing and spending time with him. but still, you held onto your bartending job just in case things fell apart, which they nearly did a few days ago.

jake's eyes were fixated on you whenever you used the boston shaker to make a customer their drink. he watched the way your hands would grip the shaker and move it up and down, shamelessly getting riled up by your seemingly innocent actions. your skimpy outfit wasn't helping the 'situation' in his pants either. it made him feel like he should watch you work more often.

after what felt like ages, you were finally able to take an hour long break from working, and you decided to rest in jake's car with him since it had nice, comfy seats that you could recline. when you mentioned to him that you just wanted to spend time with him in his car, he, again, got a little riled up.

you two exited the front doors, jake putting his arms around you to try and keep you warm before you arrived to his car, and it didn't take you long realize that jake was leading you to a car that looked unfamiliar to you.

"new car?" you questioned as you looked up at jake. "not a new one, just my other car," he said nonchalantly as he opened the car door for you, letting you sit down on the seat that you were not yet familiar with considering that you'd never been inside this car before.

'rich people,' you thought to yourself as you internally rolled your eyes.

but still, you reclined the seat as far back as it could possibly go before laying your head down on the headrest of the seat after placing your bunny ear headband on the dashboard, closing your eyes and trying your best to shield your face from the sunlight that lightly beamed on you from the windows.

"is it too bright, princess?" jake asked as he shielded your face from the sun with his big hand, "the windows in this car aren't as tinted as the ones in my other car."

you nodded, admitting that you thought it was too bright, but you told him that you'd be okay as long as your face was covered. at that, he reached over to the side of the seat, pulling out a foldable windshield cover to block the sun, making sure you were fully shaded from the bright beams.

you let out a content hum in response and as you finally closed your eyes to rest, you couldn't help but have underlying thoughts of doing 'things' with him in the car. you wanted him at the most inconvenient times. you were trying to sleep for fuck's sake, but your stomach was beginning to heat up; the pit in your stomach only grew bigger when you realized that you and jake haven't fucked since the day of your argument. you needed to feel him, and you couldn't bear even a second more of not having him inside you.

"jake?" you asked as you looked over at him, him face toward you immediately and giving you all of his attention. "hm? what's wrong, princess?" he responded, reaching over to you and putting his hand on your thigh. his touch only made you even more nervous to ask him if you guys could move to the backseat.

"can we maybe..." you said softly as you looked behind you. jake chuckled at your shyness as he began to gently run his hand up and down your thigh. he could tell by your needy eyes that your request to move to the backseat was not one of innocence.

"move to the backseat? why is that, princess?" jake instigated teasingly although he already knew exactly what you wanted. you pouted as you let your head fall onto the seat's headrest again, your cheek cutely squished against the surface which made jake giggle and place a kiss on your forehead.

the two of you quickly climbed into the backseat and comfortably situated yourselves before ending up all over each other in a matter of seconds. you fiddled with the buttons on his silk shirt before eventually beginning to unbutton it from top to bottom. jake locked his lips with yours, smiling into the kiss as you continued needily unbuttoning his shirt until his toned abs were on display for your viewing pleasure.

getting on the floor between his legs, you teasingly ran your hands down his torso until you got to the waistband of his trousers. flashing your needy eyes at him once again, he gave you a look of approval, biting down on his plump bottom lip before you pulled his pants and boxers down in one go. you moaned quietly at the sight of his hard cock on display for you, spitting on his member before beginning to stroke it.

"shit," jake cursed lowly as you gently kissed up his shaft, slowly stroking him at the same time. eventually, you started to suck on as much of his length that you could fit in your mouth, jake groaning and biting his lip as you pleased him. you pumped the half of his member that didn't fit in your mouth as jake whimpered and gripped onto the edge of the seat so hard that his knuckles began to turn white. watching jake's legs tremble from overstimulation as he moaned out for you was such a cute sight in your eyes.

you swirled your tongue around his tip and began to suck on it, which made jake go absolutely insane, his chest rising and falling slowly as he tangled his fingers in your hair.

"wait," jake panted, "i don't wanna cum yet; i wanna cum inside you." his comment made the fire in your stomach grow, your panties clinging to your entrance as you got more and more wet.

you two switched places, jake now being in between your legs and sliding your panties down eagerly as you played with his hair. immediately after placing your panties off to the side, jake pushed the skirt part your dress up to your waist and began to work wonders with his lips and tongue against your entrance, making you moan out loud for him. he sucked on your clit while skillfully pumping his fingers in and out of you, groaning against your sensitive entrance.

"jakey," you moaned quietly, "n-need more." he swirled his tongue on your clit one more time before looking up at you from in between your legs and reaching over to recline the seat you were in.

he got off the floor of the car and positioned himself in front of you, already beginning to tease your needy pussy with his tip.

"please?" you begged with glossy eyes. "have i ever said no to you, my princess?" jake asked as he inched himself inside you, causing you to gasp out and let out a quiet mewl.

you held onto his shoulders as you felt the slight burn of his girth stretching you out when his tip passed your entrance. it hadn't been that long since the last time you had sex with jake, but it'd been long enough to where you'd have to get used to his size for a little bit before letting him go all the way in.

he hissed at the way your walls were already starting to pulse around him as you let out a moan, his tip resting right in the spot you wanted him the most. he groaned and bit his plump bottom lip as he began to gently thrust in and out of you, the two of you moaning in sync as the rhythm of his hips became more steady. your eyes were fixated on his handsome face as he pounded into your sensitive entrance which began to grow sore.

"aw, my princess can't stop looking at me," he cooed before trailing kisses along your neck, "you love looking at daddy while he's making your pussy feel good, huh?" you nodded, eyes teary from the immense amount of pleasure that he was giving you.

"m-mhm," you managed to respond, "so handsome. w-wanna ride you." you stuttered out, making jake smirk and swiftly change his and your position so you could comfortably sit on top of him. the feeling of sinking down onto his thick cock made you let out a lustful moan as you fully settled down into his lap, taking as much of him as you possibly could in the position you were in. "daddy makes me feel so good."

"mhm, princess. i'm so deep inside you," jake groaned lowly, kneading your ass as you began to roll your hips against his, the two of you moaning and close to orgasming.

"i wanna cum s-so bad, jakey," you mewled out while bouncing softly on his rock hard cock, wanting so badly to feel him deeper despite being slightly overstimulated.

"let loose, my princess. i've missed having your cum all over my cock."

and at that, you let your arousal run down his length, moaning his name all throughout your orgasm whilst his cum spurted inside you and filled you up.

staying on his lap for awhile to relax, you looked jake in his pretty brown eyes. you two finally felt like you officially made up after car sex of all things, which was pretty on-brand considering your relationship with him. jake drew a little heart on the fogged up window, giggling afterward as he looked into your pretty eyes.

you never knew that fucking and unintentionally making up in the process felt so damn good until jake introduced you to that concept.

"let's put all this petty shit behind us, y/n," you heard jake's soft voice in your ear, "being without you is... really weird, honestly, you know, because we spend a lot of time together, like jeez, you were all i was thinking about before i came to see you." jake admitted as he chuckled.

you nodded your head though you tried desperately to not let him know that you shared the same emotions.

"no more fighting," you agreed with a light laugh, "after all, how could daddy be mad at his princess?"

--------------------------------------------

you don't remember going home from work last night, but all you knew right now was that you have a good 30 minutes to get ready to catch the underground train to get to school.

springing out of bed, you quickly threw some clothes on, washed your face and brushed your teeth, threw your school stuff into your backpack, and sped over to the kitchen counter to put some fish flakes and a vacation feeder in perry's tank for good measure. but before busting out of your front door, you remembered something important: you needed to give jeongin his suit jacket back.

with the thought of all the trouble it caused between you and jake, you picked it up, opened your front door, locked it behind you, and began to make your way toward the underground train station.

surprisingly, you made it to the lecture hall with quite a bit of time to spare, so you scoped out a nice and quiet spot for you, yeji, and jeongin to sit for the duration of the day's lecture. you hung jeongin's suit jacket on the chair next to you to save one of the seats next to you for him.

now that you knew for sure what you and him had was platonic, you were no longer antsy to see him whenever you had class together; it was a colossal relief and weight off your shoulders to know that he was simply a close friend.

just then, you were snapped out of your thoughts by someone plopping into one of the chairs next to you. it was jeongin.

"hey, y/n!" jeongin smiled warmly, "it's been forever since we've seen each other! how've you been since the ball?" you smiled back at him. "ummm, just a bit stressed over school as usual," you responded, slightly guilty about the white lie since you knew that he was genuinely curious about how you were feeling, "oh yeah! your suit jacket is hanging on the chair if you didn't notice. thank you for giving it to me that night. it was super sweet of you."

he turned around and looked at his suit jacket that he hadn't seen in a little while and smiled before grabbing a notebook and some pens out of his backpack, getting ready for class to start.

"is yeji coming today?" jeongin asked as he ran his fingers through his hair with a chuckle. you checked the time on the clock then looked over to the door. "she's probably just running late as per usual," you chuckled back just as she bursted into the lecture hall.

"i'm here! i made it, guys!" yeji cheered as she pranced over to where you and jeongin were sat. "congratz on making it here before the lecture started, yej," jeongin said sarcastically, making yeji roll her eyes.

"at least i showed up today," she huffed as she plopped into her chair just in time for the beginning of class.

the boring professor started his lecture with a speech about how everyone now has to work harder than ever at this homestretch before graduation and blah, blah, blah.

in the middle of his speech, yeji leaned in closer to you to tell you something.

"psst, you know there's gonna be a halloween party at the choi frat house the day before actual halloween, right? we have to go!" she whisper-yelled, "this might be one of our last frat parties ever, and it's gonna be super fun!" you let out a quiet sigh as you looked over to the side of the room where one of the choi frat house members, yeonjun, sat.

"yeji, you know we have to prepare for finals, right?" you said with a raised eyebrow.

yeji grabbed your arm and shook it gently. "oh come on," she whined, "it's one party. i promise it won't literally make you fail all your exams." she said with sarcasm.

"y/n, the two of us are going to that halloween party at the choi frat house next weekend. it'll be so fun, and there's gonna be loads of cute guys there," yeji said with a grin on her face as she held both of your hands, "plus, i already planned our costume; the classic angel and devil. better be ready at 8PM sharp so that we can enjoy the whole party, you know, if you decide to stay long enough to possibly get some action from a guy who'll try to convince you to wipe your memory of jake for just one night before you freak out and remember how much you 'L-word' him and realize that you don't want anyone else touching you but him."

you nervous smile before slowly nodding in agreement, but not before you smacked her on her arm because of her slick and snarky little comment.

"okay, fine," you sighed, giving in to her proposal, "but only because i know you won't stop pestering me until i agree." a cheeky grin formed on her face as she shook with excitement in her seat.

'a halloween party? really?' you thought to yourself as you plunked your head into your hand, rubbing your forehead as you realized what you'd just agreed to.

your halloween party conversation ended just in time because now the professor was finally going to begin talking about things that pertain to the class.

"all of that talk about graduation being said, i am now going to present to you all part one of your final project assignment for my class," your professor announced as he switched the slide on the screen and began to explain the assignment, "this project is a partner activity and will be a showcase of what we've learned the entire year. i'll give you all the privilege to pick your partners; choose wisely and begin working before your first progress check rolls around. i recommend that you review this semester's and last semester's material independently before jumping into the group work."

you, yeji, and jeongin immediately exchanged looks, which solidified the fact that you all would be partners for this stupid project for this stupid class.

"well, i guess we better start looking over the stuff from this class before jumping into the group work," jeongin shrugged, mocking the professor as you and yeji snickered.

just then, your phone buzzed, startling you. you reached into your pocket to pull out your phone to see texts from jake.

your heart fluttered at the thought of being absolutely spoiled rotten by jake. so naturally, you texted him back, agreeing to go out after class.

you couldn't help but get nervous about your bold text as you awaited his reply.

your stomach flipped at jake reciprocating the flirty-ness that your threw out, making you even more excited to see him as much as you hated to admit it. after all, you agreed not long ago to go to a party where there will be "loads of cute guys" to try to forget about him for just one second, so why would you even be excited to see him at all if you were trying so hard to not like him.

'how fun,' you thought to yourself as you put your phone back in your pocket, 'more conflicting feelings.'

--------------------------------------------

after waving goodbye at yeji and jeongin once class ended, you sighed as you walked out of the lecture hall, stressed with the weight of a group project that rested on your shoulders. although you were working with your two best friends, it didn't fully change the fact that you hated group work.

still, you tried to shake it off as you looked around for jake and found him sitting on one of the benches outside, looking as handsome as ever, of course.

you waved from the other side of the street to steal his attention away from his phone where he was most likely watching dog videos. seeing something abruptly move from side to side, he looked up to see you smiling a bit shyly at him as you waved your arm in the air. jake immediately hopped off the bench, looking left and right before crossing the street, which you found cute for some reason. once he was close enough to reach out for you, he instantly pulled you into a tight hug. after letting go of you, he looked into your eyes and cocked his head.

"you look so stressed, my princess. what's wrong?" he frowned as he put his arms around your waist before placing a chaste kiss on your cheek.

"oh, it's just school stuff, that's all," you replied, trying your best not to let out a stress ridden sigh, "i have to review old material for a group project that i need to start working on asap."

he felt as if there were other things weighing you down, but he took your word and just nodded his head.

jake trailed one of his hands up to your back and rubbed gentle circles around it, showing you that he understood the stress you were under. the pda you two were displaying felt amplified for some reason, making you become more shy with every circle jake rubbed on your back.

"here," jake said as he tilted your chin up to look at him, "we can go to a nice cafe, and i can help you study. does that sound good, princess? we can go out and shop some other time." his proposal made you smile and nod your head eagerly as he began to lead you to his car.

he drove to a cute little cafe and looked over at you in a way that he was waiting for your "approval" of the place. you smiled at him and then peered out the windshield, admiring the cute and neatly groomed plants that surrounded the small building. jake opened the car door for you then took your hand to lead you inside.

the door jingled when jake opened it, a barista giving you two a warm smile upon your entry.

"go ahead and sit down. i'll go and order for us," he smiled as you sat down and began to take your notebooks out to study. you felt a sense of calmness now that you were in the peaceful and beautifully decorated cafe.

soon, jake came back with two cups of tea and a small variety of pastries for the two of you to snack on for the duration of your visit. you smiled as you took a bite of one of the soft pastries, later washing it down with some tea.

"let me help you study, princess," jake smiled as he picked up a highlighter and a pen, "tell me what you need help with, and i'll get right to it."

you went on to explain the basics of the material whilst jake listened intently, occasionally glancing at your face while you talked; your beauty causing a distraction for him.

"sorry that my explanation was a bit rocky; i'm not very good at articulating stuff," you admitted sheepishly as jake quickly gathered himself to look as if he wasn't staring at you.

"no, no, it was fine, princess. don't be so hard on yourself," he reassured you with a chuckle stroking your hair as he began to highlight some of your notes, still trying to play things off. which he, of course, succeeded at because you remained mildly stressed, causing you to be less attentive than usual. "you'll be able to go home and rest in no time," jake smiled whilst you also began to make notes on the material that you just explained to him.

you'd be lying if you said that you weren't feeling comforted by him, but there was also some underlying uneasiness at the thoughts of what he said to you that night.

'just forget about it, y/n,' you scolded yourself mentally, 'you already "made up" with him, so just fucking focus on what's important.'

"zoning out?" jake asked with a sheepish laugh as you snapped yourself out of your thoughts, nodding in honest agreement. "yeah a little," you responded with a weak smile.

"let me take you home then."

--------------------------------------------

jake finally pulled up to your house after what felt like forever considering that you were exhausted. he took initiative and carried your school bag for you as you trudged to unlock the front door. once you walked in, you instinctively fed perry before walking to your bedroom, jake locking the door for you then walking over to place your backpack next to your couch.

walking into your room felt like heaven on earth. you didn't even want to change into comfy pajamas before flopping onto your bed, but you decided to quickly change so you could reach the maximum amount of comfort you could possibly feel.

jake walked in while you were in the middle of changing, his face immediately turning bright red at the sight. you sensed his presence and turned around in a slightly startled manner. "s-sorry, i can get out-" jake said as he pointed at the door behind him. "jake, you've seen me naked before," you chuckled before pulling your pajama pants up, "you're silly." his lips formed a pout as you giggled.

he walked over to your dresser drawers and opened the one that he stored some of his clothes in, similar to the way you did at his house, and found something warm comfortable to change into.

watching him undress himself only to put on different clothes kinda turned you on, but you felt too tired to act on those feelings and urges so you opted for just innocently lying on the bed with him.

before he crawled into bed with you, you heard him plop on the floor next to a pile of plushies you had in one of the corners of your room. "i missed you guys so much," jake said, his words muffled from the fact that he plunked his head face-first into their soft fur. jake was very fond of soft and fluffy things, so you could practically sense the happiness radiating off of him now that he finally got to be with your plushies again. you smiled lightly at how cute he looked whilst choosing which one he wanted to bring over to the bed. once he finally settled on one, he hopped into bed with a little 'whee!' and snuggled up next to you, hugging the plushie.

"someone's comfortable," you chuckled as you brushed his hair with your fingers, "so cute, puppy."

you hated admitting that you loved his touch. you loved when he was close to you. you loved the feeling of his body against yours. even though you adored his touch so much, your heart was still twisting itself into knots, still not being able to forget the harsh things he said that were still eating away at your heart.

jake must've sensed that you were feeling uneasy because he randomly decided to shimmy up close to your face and look you in your eyes. you swore that jake's sixth sense was knowing if there was something on your mind.

"my pretty princess," jake said with a cute smirk, "something on your mind?" he asked.

'shit. he knows,' you thought to yourself as your brain scampered to find a response. you didn't want to tell him directly how you were feeling, so you just let words spill out.

"i-i just, i really," you stuttered, "i really need to be close to you right now." you didn't even exactly know what you meant by that, but you felt like it was the only way you could express yourself; by just letting words fall out of your mouth. you didn't know if it would make you feel better to push him away or to let him hold you so tight that he probably physically wouldn't be able to let you go, so you decided to try the second option for the time being.

your hand snaked itself down to palm him through his sweatpants as he started to kiss your face gently. everything happened so naturally that you almost didn't even realize what was happening.

jake soon locked his lips with yours, kissing you slowly as he put his hands in your shirt. you snuck one of your hands past the waistband of his sweatpants and began to feel his hard through his boxers until you worked up the courage to slide your hand into them. jake gasped into the kiss at the feeling of your hand on his sensitive cock.

you freed yourself from the kiss, you and jake positioned yourselves in a comfortable position where he could easily slide into you. lining his tip up to your needy entrance, he gently entered you, both of you gasping at the feeling.

"is this what you meant when you said you needed to be close to me?" jake asked with a cute smirk to which you became bashful. "maybe," you responded to him as you pushed your hips down further, causing you both to let out quiet moans again. you tried to stay still and just cockwarm him, but you subconsciously started to squirm and move around to feel him more. you heard him suck in breaths whenever you moved around, his arms seeming to hold you tighter.

"aww, is my princess needy? do you want to feel daddy even closer?" jake cooed as you nodded. in this moment, you felt like you didn't have enough self control to only cockwarm him; you wanted, no, needed, more because you just wanted to see if it would be the solution to your heartache caused by the fight.

jake chuckled at how cute you were whenever you were needy for him then proceeded to gently position you onto your side so he could fuck you just the way you wanted. lifting up your leg for easy access, he lined his tip up to your entrance and pushed himself in, earning a few quiet moans from you once he started fucking you slow.

the gentle sex started to remind you of the night you two fought since that was what you two were doing before the whole altercation, but you tried to push it out of your mind and pay attention to the pleasure. you let jake kiss you slowly as he slid his cock in and out of you at a perfect pace; not too slow, but not too quick. losing yourself in the kiss, you were soon able to forget for a second why you were feeling gloomy in the first place. jake's lips hypnotized you along with his strong thrusts. jake didn't fuck you from the side that often, but whenever he did, you couldn't help but become completely lost in pleasure.

you whined out for him as your thigh trembled in his hand, making him chuckle sexily as he left wet kisses on your neck. it seemed as though you became overstimulated earlier whenever jake fucked you slow than if he were to be rough.

"is daddy making you feel good?" jake asked with an amorous tone as he watched you grip onto the sheets. "mhm," you nodded slowly, your legs trembling, "so good, daddy." you whimpered.

jake suddenly and slowly pulled himself out of you, rolling you into your elbows and knees as you arched your back for him. he let out a groan, turned on by the fact that you knew exactly what he wanted you to do for him.

jake's nails dug into the soft skin of your ass as he pushed his cock back inside your leaking pussy, your walls immediately tightening around his length.

jake wanted to keep his pace and fuck you slow, but he always found himself losing his self control when he would fuck you from behind. he subconsciously began to thrust into you harder, making you moan into the bedsheets. his hands traveled all over your back and torso as his tip poked your cervix.

"aw, we forgot to turn your poor little plushies' heads around," jake teased, "now they know how much of slut their mommy is, don't they?" he asked as he landed a hard spank on your ass. you let out a whimper in response while jake continued to please you from behind. "m-mhm, i'm daddy's slut," you mewled out subconsciously as jake slowed down his pace, ready to change positions again. chuckling at how cute you were being, he gently lifted you up and sat you next to him.

"get on top, princess," jake commanded with a gentle tone as he patted his lap. naturally, you followed his order: straddling his thighs before letting him reenter you.

slowly, you sunk back down onto his length, letting him stretch you out once again. jake grabbed onto your hips and helped you set a comfortable riding pace, helping you reach your high as you quietly mewled for him.

"that's right, baby," jake praised while you slowly began to bounce on his cock, "just like that. my good girl." he let his head fall back while he groaned and clawed at the soft skin of your ass.

"w-want daddy's cum," you whimpered as you looked at him with your pretty eyes, rolling your hips against his and trying to get him to reach his high.

"i know, princess. daddy's close, okay?" he reassured you breathlessly as he held your hips down, beginning to thrust into your pussy in order to poke at your sweet spot. "fuck," you whined out with a small squeak, "mmh, right there."

the two of you moaned in sync as you reached your highs. you felt jake's thighs tremble as he filled you up with his cum, a mixture of yours and his arousal ran down your inner thighs.

you got off of him then proceeded to rest on your side for a second; it didn't take long for you and jake to collect yourselves and clean each other up after the deed. you quickly got comfortable again, jake holding your waist from behind and cozying his chest against your back.

he let out a content hum as he held you close. you, on the other hand, were feeling a hodgepodge of emotions that you didn't even know if you could describe.

all you knew in this moment was that you still felt hurt; your heart beginning to twist itself in knots again as your head became clouded with the, very slim, possibility of jake leaving you. you were trying to drill into your head and convince yourself that you didn't want him, you wanted his money.

you suddenly felt yourself squeezing on his arm that was wrapped around you. squeezing and holding him as if you were trying to keep him in place; keeping him in place as if he was trying to leave you. soon, you felt your face become wet with tears that stared to subconsciously fall from your eyes. you didn't even know when you started crying, you just knew that you probably wouldn't be stopping any time soon.

jake already felt slightly alarmed at your sudden tight grasp on him, but a siren blared loudly in his head when he felt a tear roll off the soft skin of his arm.

"baby, what's wrong?" jake asked with concern while he held you close, gently helping you sit up so that you could breathe. you covered your face and sobbed into your hands. you physically could not hide your hurt feelings anymore, so you just let everything out right then and there.

why were you so emotional lately? it shouldn't even matter anymore, but why did it feel as if your world was crumbling over one, teeny tiny situation? why were you so sensitive over anything that had to do with jake?

jake wrapped his arms around you and began to gently rock you back and forth to try to comfort you as you cried. at this point, jake knew why you were crying. he knew that what he did really fucked you up, and it was eating him alive that you were still in pain over something he did. he had a feeling that you were hiding how you felt, but he didn't want to pry so he just left it alone.

"i-i'm s-sorry," you hiccuped as you frantically tried to dry your tears which only made jake's heart break even more knowing that you didn't think your emotions were valid, "i just n-need a s-second."

jake could feel pieces of him breaking when you calmly stood up to walk out of your bedroom, sniffling and hiccuping through tears and out the door, closing it to create physical space between the two of you.

'why am i even crying?' you internally scolded yourself as you walked into your bathroom to look at yourself in the mirror. your eyes were red and puffy, cheeks stained with tears.

it's as if the more you tried to block out your emotions, the harder they came.

you looked over your shoulder to see your bedroom door begin to creak open, prompting you to quickly grab the door handle of the bathroom door and pull it shut.

the sound of the door being shut made jake feel a physical pain in his chest, now hyperaware of the still ongoing effect of when he lashed out on you.

the thin walls didn't make things any better; he could hear your sniffling sobs even through the closed door. still, he slowly approached the closed bathroom door. you could feel his footsteps on the ground where you sat with your back against the door. all you could do was bring your knees up to your chest and let yourself keep crying; you didn't have the energy to keep it in anymore. not even the embarrassment of showing your vulnerability to jake was enough to get you to shut up.

"y/n," you heard jake's soft accent through the thin wall, "baby, please don't lock yourself in there. please let me in." hearing his voice made you body stop everything that it was doing; a full-body reaction to the simple sound of his voice. did his voice make you feel everything or nothing at all?

you did want to let him in, yes, but you physically couldn't push yourself off the floor to open the door for him. "g-give me a s-second," you said for the second time tonight as you took deep breaths in attempt to gain a sense of calmness before facing him again. with a final deep breath, you managed to get yourself off the floor.

slowly opening the door, you were met with jake's tear-stained face and still watery puppy-dog eyes.

it was not-so silently established that you hated seeing each other cry once you practically fell into each other's arms, both emotional, crying messes. the scene was enough to make perry raise an eyebrow and wonder what the hell his owner was doing at this hour of the night.

"i promise i'll never do it again, my princess," jake declared with a quiet whisper, "i'll never raise my voice at the girl i care about the most ever again."

you felt a small chunk of your heart heal, but just for emotional safety, you vowed to try to push him away again.

well, maybe not a push. maybe just a nudge.

and the halloween party would be perfect for that, right?

--------------------------------------------

a/n: hi gang, i'm finally back with another chapter! i've been working on lots of stuff lately, but expect another chapter this month :)

taglist: @axartia @jjhmk @valiantwastelanddelusion @jayroseyy @ayohahaha @asaheyow @lhsng @i-dalso @bunhoons @red-xherry @duolingofanaccount @lix-freckle3 @l0st-h0p3s @leeis @muffinminnie @green-orangeade @imbaeksbae @sunghoonmybeloved @sjakewrld @markleeisdabestdrug @futuremodeldiary @jeondolly @lil-iva @lalalalawon @noirgray @jckeplanet @teddy-lhj @meinapricity @jjkshies @bubbleseo @cherryunie @mqndnolia @bently-baby @fluffypiesstuff @ihrtk1ve @wonkiluvr @teti-menchon0604 @lovienikitty @rjsmochii @omgjwon @sunshine-skz @wy1999t @lv4rin @oceanyocean @jakeswhore

side note: before being asked to be added to the taglist, make sure that you set up your tag settings! i'd hate for you to miss out if you asked to be on the taglist only to not see your tag :(

[unproduciblesmackdown]

furthermore going like okay not Sure of timeline things But. concerning bonus material Atlas's Actual Shirts deal

a) that bonus material is bonus material but this sure seems to fall into the [could be canon] &/or [basically is, but unseen within the main material b/c there's not really a place for it there] realms

b) both acknowledging the Marriage(tm) with a critical deconstructing lens huh. the girls & the gays. fucked up that someone might for example have an ongoing Gayce Moment (presumably aro as well, hardly irrelevantly) where their transactional associations must hinge on math, murder, etc

c) appreciating like okay mordecai would've lost everything but the clothes he was already wearing when he had to impromptu hightail it out of nyc, so that's when atlas must've given him his own clothes; this is Definitely Years Later (edit: definitely Months! Perhaps years! plausibly like a year or two! and apply that throughout the rest of this post)

d) when i) mordecai can surely have afforded to replace all the lended clothes & ii) his fumbling to argue the Practical Reasoning behind currently(!) wearing atlas's clothes still means it's Not for practical reasons. years later. while dodging & glaring at & competitive with & needling at atlas's wife. Oh You Know

e) and what a choice on atlas's part to give mordecai his own clothes. sure, that could've been the quickest way to give him Anything to wear (not now bloodstained, for instance) but buying new clothes would be like some possible Next Day shit, or, i dunno, asking around for Other people's secondhand clothes, both of which account for: this being several years prior to when this conversation could've happened, mordecai was how old when he met atlas? 16-18? 21 while we have it that:

this, after the fray at the lodge (noticing for the first time mordecai still has marks on his face from that here. it's been seventeen years Still noticing brand new things. like wick in volume one looking at a group photo in the café ft. the only characters known to us being mordecai, atlas, & viktor. what are you interested in about that hmm???) wherein, with the band on the stage, mitzi with a ukulele, & the dialogue suggesting as much amidst the context that atlas didn't really start being allied with marigold until after the lodge fray proper slaughter, atlas seems to be in the earliest stages of Meeting His Wife here. with his Ferocious Little Shadow. who i also note is looking Entirely Away even as prior i've simply interpreted this as Keeping An Eye Out &/or general disinterest in Anything going on at the speakeasies. competitive to near-homicidal relationship with atlas's ever-present wife....which, remembering what i was getting at in the first place. if atlas's shirts are noticeable big on mordecai at that point, surely all the more so originally. and he kept them! and kept wearing them! for Emotional Reasons Only Actually. goodness gracious.

f) where's the walking on sunshine mitzi & mordecai shopping montage? which did apparently happen, unless instead mordecai then rushed to get new bespoke shirts himself to avoid others Perceiving him judgmentally and the walking on sunshine montage specifically. she gives him a makeover (from buttonups to buttonups. whaddaya gonna do) she asks him for begrudgingly familial makeup touchups....she shares intimate exclusive secrets with him concerning my firm [they were both in on atlas's death, and so would atlas have to have been too] stance....Girl,

g) "atlas and i discussed that" what???? who???? when & why???? mitzi kicking her legs like so tell me about your Ferocious Little Gay Little Two Steps Ahead Shadow. did atlas volunteer mordecai's Entire Backstory as he knew it? did he provide it upon Request? did mitzi ask "why's ya boy wearing shirts that don't quite fit" and atlas goes "oh yeah that's because they're my shirts. i have noticed this without saying anything. for years" like imagine. what's going on around here

h) i forgot how i planned to work in this image of "i love this shot of & Look for mordecai." disheveled freshly wounded undershirt towel suspenders now as fashion accessories over pants Annoyed Sideeye & it Does help that elsa, real fave tertiary character, is here serving as well with the waist pants & putting her hair up & they're both always serving anyways. You Better Not Be Cunty Mordecai when i get over there to fish the shotgun pellets out of your body, Said No One!!!

anyways recap atlas giving mordecai his own shirts (at all genuine or All about trying to spam the [benefactor] key so mordecai sticks around & shoots people for him?) mordecai accepting and continuing to wear them for years until thwarted by atlas's wife whom he is Competitor with and now in one of those classic duos of "do we hate each other? well maybe, but also no of course not. we also share an understanding we can't have with anyone else. which is a secret about the same guy who neither of us wanted to die but were both involved in his death" mitzi Knowing things about mordecai, oh i know all about you wearing my husband's shirts years later, mordecai is at atlas's funeral nobody else we know but mitzi & asa are there obviously mitzi would have to know about this too like. transcendent. fluorescent. head in hands. happy pride