#ok. done waxing poetic for now

[unnonexistence]

i should be Doing Tasks instead of sitting here waxing poetic about math but i do think graphs (the discrete math kind) (not this kind 📊📈📉) are the most elegant and beautiful mathematical object

[geekyanglophile]

Dude heard that lobsters are “biologically immortal” because they have a little bit of telomerase going for them and thought that meant death is unnatural lol. You realize many animals have shorter lifespans than humans? In fact, for many species the norm is to live only as long as it takes to reproduce.

And really the argument about whether telomerase would ever be an effective “anti-death” solution is completely irrelevant to the original post (and even if we could be immortal… imagine how quickly we would completely overrun the planet… I mean we already are). The anti-aging argument isn’t really about whether ppl are dying or not… we are literally all dying… every last one of us. Anti-aging products are about beauty standards (which is why they are primarily marketed towards women). These products aren’t actually about stopping aging (you’ll notice none of them contain telomerase). Their only purpose is to cover up, reverse, or minimize the physical signs of aging. And by all means, if those features make you sad or uncomfortable, then use whatever products work for you. But people (and women specifically) should not be expected to use these products to cater to beauty standards. Using these products will not improve your lifespan or overall health (other than sunscreen but I don’t consider that an “anti-aging” product).

scrunching my face real hard rn

[brandwhorestarscream]

If d16 was carrying in the movie that could have saved him.

OOH I HAVE. THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS

Part 2 here, part 3 here, part 4 here!

Hear me out, ok. Sentinel Prime heavily, heavily advocates for chastity. He very publicly denounces casual intimacy, waxing poetic about how it's a very special thing that should only be shared with someone you truly love and trust. To give yourself away to a stranger in a one night stand or even casually to a friend is one of the greatest disservices one can do to themselves. Interfacing should only be done with your bonded mate. While it's certainly not illegal, their Prime's warm concern and insistence that they're all special and should be treated as such keeps a lot of mecha's panels closed. The vast majority of them are saving themselves for their conjunx endura.

Now, the real reason Sentinel doesn't want them having sex? He doesn't want them breeding. Specifically the lowest of society, he doesn't want his cogless servants sparking each other up and having babies with t-cogs. It would raise too many questions, and while he has no qualms about taking a newspark's cog out before they're presented to their parents, accidents happen. People slip up. Some sparklings come before their parents can get to a hospital. Some nutcases want home births because it's "more intimate and natural". Some just plain don't realize they're carrying until they start having contractions. Cogless bots popping out babies with cogs will only cause problems, so the best way to prevent such a thing is to convince them that chastity is their best option. Most of them die before they can find someone they want to be with forever, and even among those that do, they struggle to save up enough money for a bonding license. Keeping them repressed and chaste is just another means of his control.

Now, as for sweet D-16 >:) he practically worships Sentinel Prime. He has such blind adoration and trust in him. Orion adores him too, of course, but not quite on the same level. He doesn't look at Sentinel with the same stars in his optics, though certainly has boundless respect and admiration for him. When they're visited by the Prime post-Iacon 5000, they're invited up to his personal suite 👀

Consider: instead of getting immediately jumped by Darkwing, they actually do get escorted up there. It's grander than anything either of them have ever seen, a shining and spotless penthouse with a 360° view of the city, expensive chaises to lounge on and bottles of the finest, smoothest high grade, even a jacuzzi! Sentinel Prime meets them there, and, placing a gentle hand on each of their faces, purrs that he wants to reward them.

"I've never seen anything like what you two did today," D-16 whimpers at his praise, beaming sunshine, and Orion is awestruck. "Come... sit with me."

They follow their Prime obediently and he relaxes onto one of the lounges, pulling the two cute little miners down on either side of him. They talk--or rather, Sentinel talks and they hang onto his every word, each tucked under one of his arms and nestled close against his chassis--and eventually he pops a bottle of champagne and pours them each a glass. Neither Dee nor Orion have ever had such high quality energon before: it goes down thick and smooth and warm, sending a blast of heat through their little bodies that pool in their tummies and make them start to squirm and feel woozy. Sentinel prompts they drink the whole thing, each of them, and by the time they're done they're gasping and swaying. So strong! Too strong!

The Prime's huge blue servo slides onto D-16's face, admiring his dazed expression. His optics are flickering, shutters at their halfway point, and he's visibly flushed, mouth dropped open and pretty lips parted as he pants. Swaying gently back and forth like that, Sentinel can't resist. He leans down and kisses him, gentle but controlling, and D-16 makes an honest-to-Primes squealing noise.

As soon as Sentinel pulls back, Dee wavers and collapses back against the chaise, optics blown wide even as an uncontrollable smile splits his face. He starts giggling, covering his face and rocking back and forth as euphoria bubbles out of him in uncontrollable, adorable laughter. "Oh my stars-" he gushes. "Oh my stars omistars omistars wow...!" His first kiss has left him breathless and elated, barely able to speak, worship and the greatest joy imaginable shining in his optics.

Sentinel Prime has them, both of them, in his suite, over and over and over again. They're both virgins, have never touched another mech or been touched in turn, and their leader takes great revelry is breaking their seals. Fucking their tight little valves until they're wailing and cumming in his lap, sobbing in ecstasy into his neck, clumsily kissing at his plating and swearing that they adore him, they love him, please more, more, more! He frags them on the furniture, against the wall, on the floor, even in the hot tub. He has them both on their knees in front of him on the lounge, licking and sucking at his spike and pushing each other to lap up drops of his transfluid, asks them to use their mouths on each other while he watches. He even asks them to bear their sparks and they do: he doesn't share his own but he's glad to tease at theirs, and it reduces them to mewling little piles on the floor, twitching and rocking and moaning as they crash through overload after overload. Such beautiful little pets, so eager to please, he could definitely get used to having them around for awhile.

When their time comes to an end they've started to sober up, snuggled against his sides on one of the lounges, still whimpering and panting high on pleasure, excess charge making them woozy and giggly even though the high grade is nearly out of their systems. Airachnid arrives and doesn't even give them a passing glance, informing the Prime that it's time to depart. He sends them back to their home in the mines, promising to see them again soon, just as soon as he returns from his next crusade to the surface.

D-16 and Orion stumble home giggling and shoving each other, still adjusting their armor and poking at the paint transfers spattered all over them. They're euphoric, there's no other word for it, high as a kite on pleasure, on the knowledge that Sentinel Prime wanted them and they were able to satisfy him! No longer virgins and instead claimed by the Prime!

Their batchmates welcome them home with a cacophony of cheers and hugs and jostling--MINERS! In the RACE! Their very own brothers, in the Iacon 5000! And- wait, why are you two all wet...?

They weren't intending to tell everyone, but the way they look at each other and blush and start snickering and struggling to explain is telling enough. Ratchet is already approaching with a wrench to scold them, they know better than to let a moment of excitement cloud their judgement-

"Uh, w-well-"

"Sentinel Prime wanted to-"

"SENTINEL PRIME?!" The entire room screams out in shock at once, before the cheering resumes tenfold. Their batchmates got the attention of THE Sentinel Prime?! Sentinel Prime made love to their batchmates! A couple of miners got the attention and affection of their Prime! If they thought the Iacon 5000 was inspiring that's nothing compared to this: before you know it the entire sector is mining energon at a lightning fast pace and they've hit their quotas before shift is even a quarter of the way done.

Orion and D-16 happily get to work as well, eager to do their best so that when their dashing Prime returns to them, they can tell him about how hard they worked and how much energon they mined and how well everyone is going to eat because of them!

When Sentinel Prime suddenly returns and orders triple shifts, they're surprised. Very surprised. It's not like him at all! Pretty soon the miners are running on no sleep and little fuel, some are injured and being denied time for repair and seek medical treatment. And D-16, despite his best efforts, is starting to fall behind after several weeks of the brutal demands. He's getting dizzy which he attributes to the lack of recharge. His servos keep dropping things even when he's sure he has a tight grip on them. He's nauseous, all the time, and multiple times a shift stumbles away from the rest of his crew to gag and vomit in a corner of whatever energon vein they're currently working in. Orion tries to get him to slow down, to stop, because he's clearly sick and needs medical care, but Dee isn't willing to stop. "Sentinel Prime needs us, Pax! We can't stop now!"

It all comes to a head as they're dragging themselves out of a tunnel with a full load of raw energon to be refined. D-16 suddenly stumbles, clamping one servo over his mouth and running off to the side. Orion hurriedly follows him after making sure Ironhide and Jazz have got the minecart.

"Hey, easy, easy-" he comes to rub his back as his best friend bends over, servos braced on his knees and body already rolling with slow, threatening heaves. He moans that he doesn't want to, he's so sick of purging, it hurts, please Primus, not today! "C'mon, just, let it out. You'll feel better once it's out, Dee."

D-16 groans and hunches over further, arms wrapping around his middle. "No... Primes, please- hgk-!"

"OI!" A miserably familiar voice suddenly bellows behind them, and Orion's sympathetic expression drops to sheer annoyance. Oh, no. "YOU TWO! Whaddo you think you're doin'?!" Darkwing is storming up to them. "Sentinel Prime wants his energon, so GET BACK TO WORK!"

"Darkwing, please," for once Orion is polite, one servo still braced on his friend's back. "D-16's sick, he needs-"

"I don't CARE what you think he needs!" Their superior roars, grabbing them both by the shoulders and forcing then around to face him. "I said, get back to-"

Dee promptly hurls all over the slagger's pedes.

He can't hold it anymore, but he tries, clamping both servos over his mouth even as he purges again. Half-digested energon splashes through his fingers and sprays all over Darkwing's chassis, who roars in disgust and backpedals away from him. Dee crumples to his knees, gagging, both servos planted on the floor before he throws up one final time, emptying his already meager tanks and ejecting a puddle of digestive acid that burns at his throat. It dribbles out of the vents on his neck and nasal ridge, and he sobs. Primus, he feels so sick!

Darkwing's response, naturally, is to grab them both and throw them down to sublevel 50 😌 there they meet B-127, and the plot kicks off, though a bit later than before. They make it to the surface and set out to find the Matrix. The journey is significantly longer with D-16's condition, constantly having to stop so he can rest or purge. Orion, at one point, offers to carry him, and Dee is too miserable to protest. Let's Orion gently hoist him onto his back and promptly passes out with his helm on his shoulder. He's overly warm, Orion notices: feverish, surely a sign that he's getting worse. They need to find the Matrix, soon. Maybe it can help cure Dee's sickness! And if not, well, once energon flows again they won't have to mine, and D-16 will be able to see a doctor as soon as they get home. They'll get him the medicine he needs and he'll be just fine.

When they finally arrive at the Grave of the Primes, D-16 is in bad shape. Shaking like a rust rattler, dry heaving because there's nothing left in his systems to throw up, and very hot to the touch. Orion nor Elita nor B-127 have ever seen a mech in quite such a miserable state, and they're all very worried. Orion sits him down on a rock and tells him to rest, and D-16 just hunches over, helm between his knees and arms folded over his head, the epitome of misery. Whimpering softly and praying to the Primes to please, please, make it stop. Whatever this virus is that's tormenting him, please just make it stop!

Then, they find and awaken Alpha Trion.

The Prime notices Dee's condition. Immediately. He can see it, an invisible aura none but the divine can see: this young mech hosts a precious newspark inside of him. Before he tells them the story of what happened, he opts to examine the little one. He's so young, probably too young to be a carrier yet, but he's undeniably sparked. A few decacycles along.

He tells them what's going on, why D-16 is so grievously ill. "Your sparkling is starving," he tells him seriously. "You are not receiving enough donations. Their protoform is cannibalizing your body, that is the root of your sickness. Where... is the sire? He or she should be caring for your needs."

All four of them are staring at Alpha Trion with their mouths open. D-16 is carrying?! He's pregnant?! But who-

Elita one punches Orion in the face as hard as she can, sending him sprawling into the dirt with a cry of surprise. "OW! What the-"

"You slagger!" She plants one pede on his chassis and presses down til she hears metal creak and he goes 'ow ow ow!'. "It was you, I know it was you! Who else would be so dumb?! You got him sparked up and haven't been taking care of him?! You worthless deadbeat! I should rip your fragging denta out with pliers! One at a time! I should!"

"Omigosh, Dee," behind her, B-127's voice has gone airy and light in excitement. He comes up to the silver mech's side, grabbing his servo to squeeze. "Congrats, dude! You're gonna be a mom!"

D-16, for his part, is sat there in shock. Shoulders dropped and loose, mouth hanging open, staring at Alpha Trion with his optics so wide they're at liberty to pop right out of the sockets and need recalibrating. "I'm..." his voice is barely above a whisper, shaking servos drifting toward his tummy. "You mean- I'm-?!"

He's starting to smile, joy bubbling up in his chest. Excitement, too. And terror. And a million other things that he can't name because he's too shocked, but suddenly despite how sick he feels he can't help but start to laugh. Delight blooms in his chest and forces it's way out of his throat as he starts to giggle and chuckle, and before long he's doubled over holding his stomach and laughing with tears of joy streaming down his face.

"I'm- I'm having a-" he jumps up to run over to Orion, shooing Elita off of him and throwing his arms around his friend. "Pax I'm sparked! I- I can't wait to tell Sentinel, he's gonna be so excited!"

"Sentinel?" Alpha Trion's voice goes cold and harsh behind them.

"Yes! Oh- Oh yes, Sentinel Prime, he-"

"He is NO PRIME!" The old mech bellows, and all four of them turn to look at him in confusion. "He does not bear our name!"

"...WHAT?!"

The grand reveal is even more sour this time around. So, so much more sour. The betrayal runs so much deeper, and D-16 is horrified and sickened. Watching the mech he adores and admires so much bowing to the quintessons and giving away the energon that they worked so hard for. It was already bad, but now? Now, he's carrying that monster's offspring. A sparkling conceived under false pretenses, under coercion, under lies. This baby hadn't been created by love and mutual respect, it has been made by a mech that lied to their faces to get them into his bed, to get access to their bodies to use for his own pleasure however he saw fit.

D-16 feels disgusting. Violated. Worthless. He feels tricked and used and abused. He stares down at his body feeling more nausea already roiling in the deepest pits of his tanks. Sentinel had touched him everywhere. There's not a single inch of space anywhere that's clean of that mech's touch.

No one is surprised when he suddenly folds to his knees and screams. Screams with all the force of his anguish, his shattered trust, his broken and reviled body. Manic, he claws at his chassis with feverbright optics, wailing at them to, "Get it out of me...! GET IT OUT OF ME! I don't want it, I don't- I don't want it, GET IT OUT!"

Orion is at his side in an instant, yelping, "Dee, no! Stop, you'll hurt yourself!" As he forcibly grabs his friend's servos to stop him from tearing himself apart. D-16 shrieks a wordless noise of agony, and then collapses forward onto Orion to begin sobbing violently into his shoulder. Clutching onto him like a lifeline, wailing with all the devestated force he can. Bawling against Orion and falling to pieces, brokenly asking what he's going to do.

...

Ok im gonna cut this here cuz it's getting long, like really long and my hands are tired. I can barely move my left side today lmao. Poor poor Dee 😌 hope you enjoyed this nugget of angst! If ya'll wanna see a part 2, you know what to do. The box is open uwu

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

Let There Be Hotel Complaints

Based on a post request by @rayslittlekitten I really hope you like it, I have no idea if it fits but I tried hard.

Title based on: Hozier - Dinner & Diatribes

Contains: Fluff, Ray being Gomez Addams, mentions of periods/period symptoms, smut (fingering, oral sex M and F receiving, P in V, breeding kink, possessive Ray, scents and smells, aftercare) Not beta read.

3.5K words.

Ray's feelings for you are as wide as the ocean, and his love is second only to his desire.

The hand that wrapped around your body felt like hot coals on your already heated skin, and you fought the urge to shrink away from Ray. "Raymond, I've been put in the garden working, can you let me shower before you hug me?" His arms only tightened around as you felt his chest expand against your back as he pressed his nose into your sweat-damped neck. "Ray! I'm covered in sweat."

He checked, and the sound reverberated through your body like the first rumbles of a thunderstorm. "I don't mind, Dear, you smell wonderful." His face moved to the top of your head as he took another breath, admiring how your conditioner mixed with a hard day's work. It drifted into his mind like the reaching of a siren song, slowly bleeding away his other thoughts.

His lips found your neck, and he smirked against your skin as your head tilted to make room for him. A quick glance at the clock let him know you'd have enough time to enjoy each other before the fancy business dinner tonight, and he found himself slowly unlacing from the hug as he brought one hand to your breast.

He gained more access to your skin, and you rested your head back onto his shoulder and pushed yourself into his touch, but he was pulling his hand away a second later when he felt you stiffen as he tightened his grip around your soft flesh. "Sorry, Love."

"It's ok, I'm just a little sore." There was no explanation needed as to why, you knew he knew why, he always seemed to know.

His hand moved lower, rubbing the skin of your ribcage in long, soothing strokes as his lips moved from the dome of your shoulder up your neck. "Allow me to make it up to you?"

The offer was the definition of temptation, but there were things to be done and places to be. "Tonight, if all goes well at the dinner. I have to finish with the garden and then get ready for tonight."

The teeth against your skin were not in retaliation for your conditional refusal but a promise of things to come. "Then let me help you?"

"Of course." Your reason was wholly selfish, motivated by rolled up sleeves and rippling muscles at his instance of lifting heavy bags of soil. You finished your glass of water and went back outside, not missing how Ray's eyes followed your arms as you placed your sun hat back on your head. He smiled at you, it was earnest and filled with warmth. "What do you need me to do, Gorgeous?"

You couldn't help yourself, there was something in his desire to aid you in every need that sparked something in you. "Many things, My Darling, but right now, I need help with the tea roses."

He smiled and took two steps to close the distance between you before brushing his lips on your ear. "Your wish is my command."

****

The rest of the afternoon swam by in a haze for Ray. It was the kind of torture that the training he had received many lifetimes ago could not prepare him for, and with each passing moment, his thoughts grew more debauched until he was waxing poetic in his head like a madman.

As you finished your makeup, he could not get the image of you licking the strawberry juice from your lunchtime dessert off your lips out of his head. Breathing through his nose had become an affliction; top notes of your shower gel and the underneath of you were one thing, but there was the faintest hint of him there that made him want to sink his teeth in your bare skin so many times that the hotel's tofts would look away in shame the moment they saw you.

By the time you slid into the car, pressing your legs to his as Bunny drove you to the hotel, he was afire with need. He laced his hand with yours as the vehicle travelled down from the lush countryside to the bright lights of the city and leaned in close, his nose brushing your temple as he told you more about the guests at the party you were heading to.

There were already people milling around when you arrived, handing their bags off to the Bellhops so they could enjoy their complementary night in luxury. Ray was less willing to relinquish the bags and simply blinked as the hotelier became insistent. Nevertheless, the man still walked to your room on the sixth floor, smiling saccharinely as he told you to enjoy the complimentary champagne before the party started.

The opulence of the room and the expensive champagne sat ignored by you and Ray as he steeled himself for a night of making nice and glad-handing when he would rather be doing something far more enjoyable. He took your hands and drew you to the middle of the room, wrapping his arms around you as his nose returned to your hair for the millionth time that day. "You look beautiful as always."

You smiled and placed your hands on his chest. "And you keep sniffing me like some weirdo."

He took it in stride, chuckling softly as he yanked you to his chest. "I can't help it, you smell exquisite, it's driving me insane."

You sighed, enjoying the warmth of his arms around you. "I know what you're thinking, but we promised Mickey."

He mirrored your sigh as he broke the embrace and extended his hand. "I know. We should head down there now, the sooner we go down and mingle, the sooner we can leave."

His hand found your lower back as you took the lift to the grand hall and stayed there as you met up with Mickey and Rosalind and made introductions with the upper class lucky enough to receive invites. Of course, the reason for your invitations was the massive underground white widow super cheese farm under the hotel's private golf course.

It was painfully dull, standing around making small talk about the weather and wallpaper while eating tiny pies that only served to make you more hungry. Ray stayed stuck to your side, practically dragging you around with him while he did business for his boss.

"Your wife looks lovely tonight." Ray's arm tightened around you as you spun towards the voice.

"She looks lovely every night, Dave." If Dave had plans to say more, they were defeated by Ray's harsh glare as he pulled you away.

He moved to a quiet corner of the room and placed your hand on his ample bicep. "What's gotten into Ray? You've just about ripped the heads off anyone who's talked to me tonight. I get Dave, but the Simon's are nice."

He moved into your space, pressing you against the window as he took your chin between his thumb and forefinger while he leaned in close enough that your noses were brushing. To outsiders, it would have looked like a private moment between lovers, but Ray's eyes were fixed on with a look so lustful it would have made the whore of Babylon blush. "What's gotten into me? I have spent the last two hours watching these pigs look you up and down while acting like I don't want to rip their arms off for even daring to speak to you."

You blinked, he was in a mood tonight. "Well, Dear. How about you stick it out for another hour so we can eat dinner from this stupid menu then, I'm all yours for the night?"

He swallowed and exhaled before pressing a quick kiss to your lips. "Of course Darling." His tone had shifted; it had taken on that gravelly tilt that created a flutter of excitement in your chest, and you eagerly headed back into the fray as Ray finally composed himself.

You pressed a kiss to his cheek as he leaned into your touch. "Thank you, Dear."

****

The dinner was the typical mess of rich people's food that had too many flavours and not enough on the plate, but Ray gave you all his cheese twirls and made sure to pick you the biggest slice of chocolate cake off the platter when dessert came around. All was going well until the tables were cast aside again for the wine course, and you were split from him as one of the tofts Mickey looked after pulled him away to talk about security.

His eye kept drifting over to you, and he grew ever more aggravated as he watched the sommelier try and fail to flirt with you. He dismissed the man he was talking to with the promise to call later, that he was tired and wanted to enjoy his hotel room and all but stormed over to you. "Are you enjoying the wine, Dear?"

You shook your head. "I've told the sommelier that I'm not interested in that variety, but he's being very insistent."

The man smiled and turned to Ray. "We have some of the best wine in the country here, your girlfriend…"

If looks could kill, Ray would have ended the man there and then. "My wife isn't interested, and I don't appreciate your tone or your attitude. I will be speaking to your employer in the morning to deal with this in full."

His hand was back on your lower back as he marched towards the lift, and between his puffed chest and his expression, no one dared to join you as the doors opened. The second the doors closed, he was on you, pressing you against the wall as his lips found yours. The grip he had on you was almost painful, his fingers digging firm into your skin as he held you in place for a searing kiss that stole the air from your lungs.

He finally allowed you to breathe when the doors opened on your floor, and he all but dragged you to your room as he shut the door and pressed up against it. His lips were on yours again, and his hands slid around your body until his fingers were curling around the fabric of your evening dress and ripping it open with the pop pop of fancy buttons.

He shoved the dress down, breaking from your lips for a moment to take in the lingerie you were wearing. "Fucking hell y/n." That went next, and his lips didn't give you the chance to admonish him about what he had paid for the now ruined fabric lying at your feet.

He once again broke from you and knelt on the floor, removing your shoes one by one before kissing his way up your legs, swapping legs with each kiss, getting closer and closer to your centre with each one until he slowed at the crease of the thigh. He was once again inhaling like he was suffocating, and you wove your hands into his hair as your frustration grew. "Can you do something instead of sniffing me?"

His teeth sunk into your skin in retaliation, and he was standing up to his full height with eyes full of threat. "Don't rush me." His hand cupped you, his fingers running your rapidly gathering wetness as he all but growled at you. "This cunt is mine, I get to take all the time I want, understand?"

You almost wanted to act out to see what it would make him do, but the poor man already looked pained enough. "Anything you want."

He locked you in another kiss, his teeth smarting at your lip as he made his wants known with a gentle pressure on your shoulders. "Get on your knees."

He kicked your ruined dress under you to soften the ground as you sunk down, and you pulled at his belt to free him. He helped you, shoving his trousers and boxers down in one go just far enough so his cock could spring out and you could grab his perfect ass unencumbered by fabric.

He looked down at you as you kitten licked around the head and felt another rush of this heated primal positiveness that he had been feeling the whole night. A hand found the back of your head as you took him into your mouth, and his free hand shot out to rest on a side table to steady himself as pleasure filled his senses.

He stopped himself from bucking his hips in order to focus on the vision of you sucking him like a lollipop. It was outright pornographic, and all he could think about was that you were all his and his alone. "Fucken 'ell, Love." You moaned around him, and he used every ounce of self-control to pull you off of him and to your feet. "Get on the bed."

His hands were all over you as you made your way to the bed, and he ran his hands up and down your sides while you spun around to face him so you could lay on your back on the plush mattress. You settled on the pillows as his lips met yours, and he finally began to remove his clothes.

Bare skin hit bare skin as his lips started a journey down your body until he was lifting your legs over his strong shoulders and onto his solid back. He kissed the bend of your knee, his lips soft as his beard brushed your skin. He locked eyes with you and smiled softly as he continued his journey upwards, finally arriving with barely there kisses that had you pushing your hips towards him. "Tell me you're mine."

"I'm yours." A hot, wet heat enveloped you as he licked you from the entrance to clit in one firm, wide lick before sealing his lips around your clit. Ray had always been a man who prided himself on his attention to detail, and your bedroom was no different; it was like he had committed precisely what you needed to memory so well that he didn't even need to try, and tonight was no different.

He seemed more desperate tonight; accuracy swapped for the burning desire to consume your whole, and it didn't help that he was moaning against your flesh like he could somehow feel what he was doing to you in his own body. The chorus of his name from your mouth only served to spur him on, and a forearm pressed your hips down so you couldn't move away from him as he used his free hand to slide two fingers inside you.

With his rough fingertips bullying your G-spot, you didn't stand a chance, and he was far too strong for you to twitch away for a reprieve as the waves of an earth-shattering orgasm took you like the undertow of a raging river. Your chest heaved as he pulled away, and he wiped his mouth on the back of his hand before bringing his soaked fingers to your lips. You licked him clean only to have him kiss away the taste like you had slighted him by taking him up on his offer, and then he was slotting himself between your spread wide legs and grinding his cock against your sensitive skin. "Tell me me you're mine."

"I'm yours." You marvelled at his self-control, his face buried in your neck as he continued teasing you. "I'm yours, please Ray."

He took his cock in hand and notched it at your entrance. "Who do you belong to?"

"You." Your reply was desperate, your hands on his heated chest with fingers curled in a threat should he persist in his game, but he didn't, and seemly satisfied with your declaration, he slid inside you with one confident push. The fullness of it stole the air from your lungs, and you lifted your hips up to take him in faster as he bottomed out.

His hand found your hip, and his fingers dug in with force as he began to move, taking a steady pace that had the head of his cock brushing your G-spot with each pass. One of your hands wove into his hair while the other clutched at his back, and he pressed his lips to yours in a scalding kiss as he picked up speed. Mercifully, before he suffocated in the air stealing a kiss, his lips moved to your neck, and then his teeth were out, marking your skin like he was trying to prove a point about his ownership over you.

He pulled away for a moment and took in your blissed out face, faltering as the vision brought him teetering to the edge of oblivion far sooner than his ego would allow, so in a mix of the desire to uphold his pride and the need for more skin to mar he pulled out of your for a fleeting moment only to flip you over then slam back home as his teeth found more skin. He was overwhelming at this angle, and your fingers curled around the pillow as he slid a hand between you to rub your clit.

Ray would often tell you that you were good for his ego, that he could walk into a room where all the men would turn their heads to look, and he could smile knowing you were his alone. But this was something different, you writhing under him, stuck between frantic begging and breathless need made him feel like a God with you as his ever willing offering.

He captured you in another kiss as the edge neared, and you shuddered as, with one more precise circle to your clit, you fell over it. His hips didn't slow, and he growled into your mouth like a hungry animal as he chased his own high. "You're mine, I own you, understand?" All you could do was nod as your vision began to grey at the edges, but he must have accepted your answer because he all but roared as he came inside you.

His strength failed as it hit him full force, and the possessive beast inside him was finally satiated, knowing he had marked inside and out. He was mindful not to crush you, but he couldn't find it in himself to move away just yet, he couldn't let his hard work slip from you just yet. His lips were once again gentle as they kissed the marks his teeth had made, and you sighed as he brushed the stray hairs from your face.

His nose found its family home on the back of your neck, and his chest expanded against your back as he inhaled. "You must be intent on trying to kill me, My Dear."

You didn't have a clue what he was talking about, and rather than ask, you kissed him in hopes he would tell you anyway, but he didn't, and the weariness in your bones forced you to speak. "What do you mean?"

He finally rolled off you, and you laid on your sides facing each other as his hand ran up and down your side. "I can't understand how someone can smell so intoxicating, it truly is torture."

You reached up to lay a hand on his cheek, and he tilted his head to press his lips to your palm. "You get like this every month, I thought you'd be used to it by now."

He shook his head, sleepy. "Never, how can someone get used to being on fire."

"I suppose that's fair." There was more you wanted to say, but it was getting hard to keep your eyes open, and he could tell. Despite his own feelings, he was getting up to clean himself up before returning with his arms loaded. He brought you a glass of water and used one of your damp face cloths to cleanse away your makeup before using another damp cloth to remove the mess from between your legs, although he did pause to watch the evidence of your shared sin drip from your body and onto the expensive sheets as another wave of possessive filled him.

With his duty done, he disposed of the unclean fabric in a pile and climbed into bed next to you, wrapping you in his arms as he pulled you to his chest. "I love you y/n."

You relaxed into his arms and dropped a kiss on his chest where his heart lay. "I love you too, Ray."

In the morning, he would awaken you with ginger tea, a heating pad, and ibuprofen before climbing back into bed with you and soothing away your aches and pains until check out finally came. Room service would find no evidence of the mess Ray had left in the aftermath of your coupling, just a pile of towels already in the dirt laundry bin when they collected the cart at the start of their shift. He did, however, get a dirty look and a snide comment from the hotelier about what kind of establishment he was running. As you checked out, Ray took it in stride.

Fin

[djungelskog-oblivion]

i’m so fucking stupid about shihoann and i’m sad it’s usually a background ship cause the power you could give these fucking lesbians is unreal

these are two CSA survivors, traumatized by one man who tried to use their bond for his own sick purposes, trying to divide them, to make them keep his secrets to protect each other.

and then he's gone. and they heal together. ann helps shiho through her physical therapy. they change together, mourn the people they used to be together. refusing to let kamoshida tear them apart any more, for their pain to separate them, they remain stubbornly together.

it's fucking beautiful, that they could find love together in the face of cruelty, that they love as an act of joy, love as an act of defiance, love in the face of guilt and invasion and pain. it is queer love between two abused girls who find solace and revenge in being together

it is exactly as radical as persona 5 likes to pretend it is.

ok whatever im done waxing poetic. more yuri...... NOW

[musicallisto]

hiiiiiii if possible can i please also request a 🐚 with formula one? i am a (suffering) woman in stem (biomedical engineering) and although i can be introverted in situations w big groups i love spending time with my friends & making them laugh. i have no gender preference and i cannot wait to see what you come up with <33333

oookay lisa, it is high time i told you about this random ship/association that has been living rentfree in my mind for a while now... i can't keep quiet any longer, and i will wax poetic about you two, because clearly your one true f1 match is lewis hamilton.

okay first of all let me get the obvious out of the way: this man is absolutely gorgeous and oh so lovely oh my god. out of all the drivers on the grid he is the one i would be RACING to introduce to my parents. my mom would never ever reprimand me for anything again if i brought a guy like lewis home.

lewis is such an attentive guy, so he would most definitely try to keep up with your studies/work the same way you do his. it's only fair, and besides, he loves it when you nerd out about engineering; the way your eyes twinkle and you trail off because you get a little self-conscious. he thinks it's the most adorable thing ever, because guess what! he is a little bit of a nerd too!

also he loves asking you for input from an engineering perspective, which you've told him time and time again that you're in biomedical, you have NO idea how his car's aerodynamism or mechanic stress work, but he still values your expertise which is, obviously, the highest of praise coming from someone who is basically The Expert himself in his domain.

and you may act humble and like the mercedes engineers' jobs are way out of your league, but you do know your stuff about thermodynamics and fuel chemistry and composite materials, and lewis is blown away every time by your off-handed commentary, as if your observations were self-evident truths. certainly to you they are, the same way he's got an almost carnal understanding of his car's behavior on the track, and that's why you make such a fierce team. you're the theory, he's the practice <3

that's probably how you would meet by the way. and they were coworkers... oh my god they were coworkers... WAIT NO what if you were lewis' RACE ENGINEER ok ok i'm backtracking!!! you DO know your racing stuff actually. ohhhh good shit

because you know lewis is a cocky bastard (honorary, he's earned it) and when he's still high off the adrenaline of the race, perhaps when he's just scored a podium, he relentlessly flirts with you over radio. tells you he never could've done without you, right, sweetheart?, in that suave voice of his. on LIVE TELEVISION??

oh the twitter girlies are eating that up. and you are fumbling over your words, trying to congratulate him in a way that doesn't give away how putty in his hands you are.

but you're the one he runs to as soon as he's off the podium and free from the clutches of journalists and cameras, without fail.

planet F1 practically implodes after saudi arabia 2021, not only from the actual race which is already a good enough reason to go crazy tbh but also because lewis hamilton, breathless after racing past the checkered flag, seemingly asks you out point blank.

"congrats, lewis! you did it! that's first in the world again!" "... i believe this means i've won my bet, and i can finally take you out?"

we won't talk about the grand prix that followed, lol. he may have lost the world championship but at least he won the girl of his dreams, or something <3

you guys are so silly together it's actually disrespectful to the whole paddock. like there are people working here, loves. doing their 9 to 5. stop giggling and taking the piss at toto wolff in hushed whispers like school children!!

but you won't, and though they may not say it... all the other drivers love you two together <3 less so when knowing you are watching seemingly gives lewis wings during shootouts, however...

[scapingthebottomofthebarrel]

Potions Mix Up (Neville Longbottom x Reader)

The request: In Potions class, the Reader accidentally brew a love potion, but instead of it working on someone else, it reveals Neville's hidden feelings for the Reader

You sit ramrod straight in your seat as Snape slowly makes his way around the classroom handing back your latest assignment. You’ve always done alright in potions, but Snape never gets any less unnerving. You hold your breath as he sets the scroll down in front of you. You decide not to check your grade until you’re in the safety of your dorm. The second the bell rings your out of your seat and make your way to the nearest court yard to breathe some fresh air after all that time in the dungeons.

“Will Snape ever not be terrifying?” You friend sighs from her spot next to you on the grass. You let out a small grunt and flip back onto the ground

“Thank Merlin we’re done and it’s Friday.” You say happily.

“Yeah, and it’s a Hogsmeade weekend!” She cheers. “What do you think yo-“ she cuts herself off with a gasp as a tall body topples over and lands directly on top of you. The wind is knocked out of your lungs and you let out a squeak. The person immediately scrambles off of you.

“I am so sorry!” A voice that you’d recognize anywhere rushes out.

“It’s alright Neville. No harm no foul.” You say with a wide smile. Neville Longbottom has got the be the sweetest boy you’ve ever met. Since you were made partners in charms last year you two had grown incredibly close.

“Seamus pushed me.” He says just loud enough that the other boy who was laughing like a mad man with Dean over on a bench would hear.

“Now why on earth would he do that?” You say just as loud.

“Cause our darling Neville was waxing poetic about-“ a look you didn’t think Neville could give crossed his face and Seamus instantly shut up.

“I’ll uhh I’ll send you umm later.” Neville says as he stand up and gives you a nervous smile.

Once the three of them are out of earshot your friend gives you the same smile all your friends do after you interact with Neville. “Promise me a good seat at your wedding.” Is all she says before standing up. “Come on, we need to go turn in our extra credit to Flitwick before we forget.” You can’t help the small smile on your face as you follow her back into the castle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monday rolls around far too fast and you find yourself back in potions class. Snape is explaining the importance of carefully examining your ingredients to get the potion right. You diligently take notes out of fear of your professor. “Alright. Now, go to your cauldrons and start the potion on page 376.” Snape says flatly before turning away and walking to his desk. Everyone quickly gets to work. Your partner goes to get the ingredients while you prepare the cauldron.

After two hours you find yourself looking at a potion that is most definitely not the assignment. “I don’t know how you did it, you seemingly followed the instructions but with the wrong ingredients and ended up with amortentia.” Snap says with the faintest hint of surprise in his voice. Your face feels hot under the stares of your classmates. Note to self, never let you or partner get the ingredients again. Snape shakes his head and mutters under his breath as he walks away.

“I’ve done far worse. At least you have a functioning potion.” Neville says coming to stand next to you. You give him a small smile.

“Wanna smell it?” You joke. Neville looks nervous but shrugs and takes a sniff. His expression goes flat and the tips of his ears turn red. “You ok Neville?” You ask curious as to what smell is causing this reaction.

“I’m fine.” He squeaks out before returning to his seat.

Your friend makes eye contact with you from their seat two tables away and mouths “Mrs. Longbottom.” All you can do is blush and look away.

Before Snape can take the potions at the end of class you and your friends sniff it. You’re not sure why you did it as you already knew what it would smell like. As you leave the dungeon you and your friends are discussing what you smelled.

“You know what we should do?” One of your friends says excitedly. “We should give some to George Weasley. I know how cute you think he is and I’ve seen him looking at you.” As you roll your eyes getting ready to tell your friend to knock it off you hear a thud behind you. You all turn around to see Neville frantically trying to pick his things up

“You guys go ahead.” You tell your friends before going and helping Neville collect his things off the ground.

“Umm th-thank you.” He mumbles out.

“Of course.” You give him a soft smile as you hand him a book. “So…you never said what the potion sme-“

“You’re not really going to use it on George are you?” He asks in what seems to be a moment of courage. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to eavesdrop it’s just well I umm-“ You decide to put Neville out of his misery and shake your head.

“My friends are just being ridiculous. We would never do that. Besides, they already know who I like.” You give Neville a meaningful look as if you’re trying to communicate with him telepathically.

“Oh. Right. Of course. Thanks for the help.” He’s practically running away before you can say anything else. You heave a sigh before picking up your own bag and going to find your friends.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’re sitting at lunch the next day when you feel a tap on your shoulder and your friends look ready to explode. When you turn to see who it is you’re treated by the extremely red face of Neville. All he does is hand you a small box before speed walking away to a cheering Seamus and Dean.

“Open it! Open it!” Your friends whisper scream at you. You slowly take the lid off the box and inside is a small plant and a note.

I’m not sure I could say this to your face so I hope this will suffice. I can’t stay quiet anymore. The thought of you trying to go out with George Weasley made me sick to my stomach. Not because George is a bad guy, but because I want to be the one to take you out. Would you go out with me?

All your friends begin cooing and awwing.

“They would love you!” One of them shouts at Neville. He looks startled and looks to you for confirmation. You nod a blushing mess and smile broadly. Seamus and Dean start shaking him and letting out their own cheers.

[aftontired]

coming back to the supernatural fandom for the first time like i did in 2017 is wild for me.

like the first time, it consumed my life. i saw references everywhere and it infected how i spoke and interacted with the world. i was also fresh from moving to a new country and i was homeschooled so i had no friends. i was lonely and depressed (even if i didn’t fully grasp that was what that weight in my chest and eyes was at the time) and i found comfort and solace in this show and in these characters and in these actors and in this world.

and now, i’m in a drastically different place. i moved several more times but i have friends, a girlfriend. yeah, there’s more distance between myself and my family then there was at the time and that’s ok. i’ve discovered my queer identity and where i stand on a political and religious level. i’m still depressed but that weight is familiar now and it doesn’t feel so world ending now.

but the traces are still there. in how i throw my head back and laugh like jared. or how i make faces into any camera i see like jensen. or when i giggle i scrunch my whole face up like misha. or how little things make me laugh. it’s in the jokes and references i have made since i heard then the first time around. how i can’t listen to heat of the moment on tuesdays. it’s in how i wanna learn to drive stick so i can feel like dean in baby. it’s in my need to research and plan and journal. (it’s in how i still list a 1967 chevy impala anytime im in a convo about cars)

supernatural has changed my life and i will always be grateful to the cast and crew who worked on it and made it into what it was and still is. (except for all the queer baiting and the lowkey sexist writing. not cool CW. not cool)

any ways i’m done waxing poetic. back to lurking.

[lesbianlenas]

what is supercorp? I tried to google it, is it the ship name for alex and maggie from supergirl?

the way that i said supercorp is supergirl and lena luthor and ur like is it maggie and alex 😭 no as i said it is supergirl aka kara danvers & lena luthor. so basically kara is supergirl obvs & lena is the younger sister of lex luthor who is superman’s archenemy obvs but she wants to do good to fix her family’s name after what they had done. so everyone at first thinks lena is evil anyway but kara looked into her eyes and could tell she’s not (real quote) and becomes bffs w her bc she is the only one who believes in lena no matter what even when she’s framed and everyone thinks she worked w her mother who is evil like lex to create a device to kill aliens. but kara never stops believing lena is good even when lena doesn’t believe in herself…..so kara is like obsessed w lena and lena loves kara bc kara is the only one to not treat her like a luthor and kara also loves lena bc lena is the only one to love her so much as kara and not as supergirl bc lena doesn’t know she’s supergirl. and as time goes on kara realizes she’s missed her chance and now lena will never forgive her for not telling her bc lena will think kara didn’t tell her bc she didn’t trust her when in actuality by the time kara was ready to tell her lena & supergirl had a falling out and then after that kara was too afraid that lena would hate her forever if she told her she was supergirl and she would lose her. so then lex tells lena that kara is supergirl and lena decides she is going to brainwash the whole world not to feel emotions anymore so no one can ever hurt the way kara hurt her but not before she hurts kara back first! so when kara finally does tell lena she is supergirl lena pretends like she’s ok w it (and she doesn’t reveal kara’s secret like she planned bc she loooooves her) and then eventually lena reveals her plans to brainwash everyone and kara tells lena that this was the biggest mistake of her life and she’s so sorry but lena doesn’t care. and everyone tries to convince kara that lena should be treated as a villain now but kara still insists lena is NOT a villain and she can get thru to lena. but lena doesn’t want to speak w her and kara tries to alter the past by telling lena she is supergirl at different points throughout the show but no matter what it always ends badly. so then at the end of the season lena realizes her plan was bad and they’re forced to team up to stop the bad guys and they make up w each other and then kara is sucked into the phantom zone for like 8 eps or smth bc melissa benoist was on maternity leave??? i think was the reason???? but after she comes back they are basically just gfs who wax poetic to each other abt how brave and amazing the other is every ep and then there’s a whole bit abt lena being a canadian witch that we ignore and they end the show w neither of them having a love interest and having an emotional speech to each other abt how they changed each other forever….

also there is a plot line where kara gets cloned and her clone has none of her memories and is taken in by lex in russia and all she remembers is the name alex (kara’s sister) who she thinks is lex and also who lena is….and she is obsessed w lena from lex telling her abt her and when she goes to national city (where the show takes place) she reads kara’s diary abt lena does not care abt seeing alex and goes and finds lena and pretends to be kara and stares at her like 👁️👁️ and when she decides to ignore what lex told her and lex is furious at her she says “this is abt lena” and lex says “i thought you were stronger” implying kara’s clone is in love w lena meaning it is such an intrinsic part of who kara is she remembered it over everything else ❤️

that being said they were never canon despite being insanely in love and they tried to shoehorn in male love interests for them both at different times but none of them stuck bc supercorp is superior. also melissa and katie are two of the hottest women ever. supercorp endgame 🤩 classic case of them corping right here

[mclarenyaoi]

thank you to the wonderful @st-leclerc for the tag!! i love tag games

are you named after anyone? like a real life flesh-and-blood person who may or may not still be with us? no

when was the last time you cried? last tuesday from 5:15-5:52pm

do you have kids? imagine if i said yes lmfao... teen dadmom simon?? sheesh my condolences to that hypothetical offspring

what sports do you play/have you played? i played on a school soccer team when i was 8 for maybe 3 weeks at most (i was very bad at it which is hilarious in retrospect) and i've done nothing sport-wise since then. i'm actually not big on sports which is ironic since, hello, motorsport sideblog. but obviously i've grown to respect sports-doing a lot more in recent years

do you use sarcasm? only with people who i believe do/can understand my psyche and/or established persona. otherwise i get scared </3

what is the first thing you notice about people? for random strangers it's physical appearance and clothes. for specific strangers it's usually something they've said

what is your eye color? black! now this could be metaphorical or symbolical or something of that nature, but my eyes are genuinely just a shade of brown so dark they're, for practical reasons, black. chinese genetic heritage 💯

scary movies or happy endings? happy endings all the way. firstly bc i enjoy things turning out ok and secondly i genuinely can't do scary movies or honestly anything with suspense — if you need a gauge for this i once had a full-on panic attack watching it 2 at a movie night because pennywise ate a kid, which is his whole gig, so... obviously i did not end up finishing it 2

any talents? looking good and feeling gorgeous

where were you born? someone cue born in the usa by bruce springsteen

what are your hobbies? i draw, i wax poetic when unnecessary, and i indulge in various hedonistic acts on the daily 24/7. these days my hobbies are nothing particularly concrete lol

do you have any pets? 1 dog (turtle) (red eared slider) (his name is tucker) (he's 22 and he hates me but he lets me hold him like a hamburger) (that's a lie he scratches me so much; i love him in spite of his bloodlust bcos he is just an animal and does not understand human things and also for a turtle that hates me hes rather gentle)

how tall are you? depending on who you ask or who i'm standing next to and what they say their height is, i'm either 5'6" 5'7" or 5'8" (167-172cm). in my heart i'm 5'8" but in my mind i'm 5'7" tho i'll usually tell people i'm 5'8" regardless. wouldn't mind an extra two inches or so, but alas...

favorite subject at school? i guessssss art or english. but that's pushing it since i for real and for serious feel virtually nothing positive towards my academic studies

dream job? minecraft youtuber. just kidding i genuinely have no fucking clue LOL. tho tbh if i could make it as a mcyt-er i'd actually go for that. you (all encapsulating) didn't know this about me but i love minecraft

no pressure tags @box-box-blorbos @oscah @solitaire-enthusiast @roosterhouse and! if anyone sees this and wants to do it consider this me tagging u 👍 wheeeee :3

[bleaksqueak]

Sometimes I go back through your old deviantart scraps to remember the good ol’ days of Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy brain rot, and gosh your art has always had such vibrant expressions and elasticity. It’s been a blast watching your style shift and grow, and I would love to see more “unfinished” sketches from your current projects. Your lineart has a wonderful energy and line weight that I’ve been very inspired by.

I know I’ve waxed poetic to you before but it’s really cool having one of my favorite artists still putting stuff out there on the internet. And I appreciate you so much! And I hope you are having a wonderful day and take all my positivity!

Ok I’m done rambling now <3

Weeping tears of joy and gratitude!

You aren’t a rude bird at all! The nicest bird in the tumblr inbox, I’d say!!

Thank you so much… 🐦‍⬛✨

[milkmynk]

ORV Fic Concept - Spiritual Isekai KDJ

OW = Original World (where KDJ is from, modern civilization) MW = Medieval World (where KDJ spiritually isekais to)

KDJ wakes up one day isekai-ed as a noble in MW. But he quickly realizes that it is spiritual isekai, because whenever he falls asleep he isekais back into OW, and vice versa (poor KDJ literally can't sleep now, he's always working either in OW or MW...)

Original MW!KDJ has a fiancé (YJH), whom he's told "he" is obsessed with but our KDJ couldn't give a rat's ass about, he's way too busy for romance ok??

Until one day he hears that his fiancé has been exiled from his own noble family for... indiscretions. Anyway KDJ picks him up from the garbage, like a big angry stray cat UwU

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Ex)fiance YJH heavily disliked KDJ due to original KDJ strong-arming him into an engagement (cause he was obsessed and not above a little blackmail). So like... in the dream that sparked this, the reason why YJH had been exiled was cause he got an STD from visiting the pleasure district LOL OOC my dude XD

KDJ cures him by using medicine from OW (he can bring items across worlds by holding them in his hand when he goes to sleep). So eventually KDJ had to tell him the origin of the medicine and his secret.

Anyhow, YJH having no other place to go and (reluctantly) intrigued by our KDJ decides to stay and be employed by KDJ. But before he realizes it, he loses his heart to oblivious!KDJ. 😘

Angst starts setting in because he starts worrying; what if KDJ stops isekai-ing into MW one day?

He only truly realizes that he doesn't want to lose KDJ when, for the first time, KDJ doesn't wake up in MW for three whole days.

He begins to panic, what if KDJ really did find a way to stop his spiritual traveling? What if he never gets to see those bright eyes and that wide smile again?

(Insert YJH waxing poetic internally about KDJ, it's all very angsty, Alexa play Despacito)

KDJ eventually wakes up with a massive headache, to see YJH dozing in a chair by his side. Warm feelings that KDJ immediately represses the hell out of ensue; KDJ thinks so loud he wakes YJH up

YJH grabs KDJ’s shoulders and goes ballistic at KDJ like, you were asleep for 3 days!!! You didn't go to sleep in OW for 3 days???

And KDJ is like. “Firstly, I have a big headache right now, please stop rattling me like I'm a baby rattle”

And, “Secondly, yeah?? I had a project deadline coming up, I needed to get the work done!”

Poor YJH stares at him, wild-eyed, before letting go and slumping back into his seat. He echos, “... You needed to get the work done.”

“Or get fired, yeah”

YJH drags a hand down his face, then pinches the bridge of his nose for good measure. “So you didn’t sleep... For three whole days.”

"Red Bull gives you wings," KDJ agrees, helpfully.

YJH thinks to himself, I’m in love with a suicidal idiot, and despairs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Interlude where YJH gets so terrified of losing KDJ + "someone needs to take care of that idiot and it sure isn’t going to be KDJ" + he's interested in the advanced civilization of OW That he asks whether, since KDJ could transport items by holding them in his hand when he goes to sleep... If, y'know, for science, if they held hands while KDJ slept... Would YJH be transported as well?

And KDJ immediately shoots him down. Cause KDJ, despite being a suicidal idiot, has a good head on his shoulders and knows that cross-contamination of populations could cause widespread destruction and death of both populations (Pathogens that one population is adapted to might be devastating for a population that is not adapted to it, etc.) Anyway that's the end of YJH isekai-ing aspirations lol /end Interlude ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

KDJ eventually finds the way to stop isekai-ing.

It’s simple, really. He doesn’t know why he didn’t think of it before. The basic theory is that his soul is compatible with both bodies and hence flits between them when one body goes to sleep.

So, in order to stop the spiritual traveling, simply put... If there's only one body alive... well, nowhere to flit to.

He, of course, does not divulge this information to YJH. But he does start making preparations for his eventual departure. You know, like an uncommunicative asshole 😊

But YJH can sense it, like there's an urgency and finality to KDJ now; like he's tying up loose ends.

They're having dinner together one night and that suspicion/feeling peaks so hard that the words in him are about to burst.

Why?

Why are you doing this?

Why aren’t you telling me anything?

Are you going to leave me?

When KDJ beats him to it.

KDJ sets down his cutlery, wipes his pretty pink mouth, and looks at YJH with the stars in his eyes and a trickster's smile on his lips.

"Hey, YJH. Shall we get married?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

YJH, to his utter horror, opens his stupid mouth and says, "Yes."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They do actually get married, but they don't consummate the marriage (because KDJ is an emotionally repressed/avoidant POS).

Basically KDJ's thought process was like :

1. If I die now, there won't be a successor to my duchy, this would cause power wars and unrest. It would be best if I could get someone competent to take over my role... Hey YJH is right there let's sic the job on him 👍

2. This way YJH can be assured that he'll have a home / job / position even after I leave

(Insert happenings / angst / sweet pain cause I haven’t actually thought of the in-between. But, I have thought of TWO endings.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>>> THE BAD ENDING, IT MAKES ME SO MAD (The one that actually happened in my dream WHICH IS WHY I’M AWAKE AT 4AM FROM ANGST.)

KDJ takes poison in MW and lies down to sleep for the last time. As his consciousness dulls and fades, he hears his door open.

He hears familiar footsteps walk closer, before a scarred, calloused hand slips into his own, and holds on tight. Searing warm, against his rapidly cooling skin.

"... You dumb bastard," KDJ sighs, before the world fades completely.

The implication is that YJH was transported to OW with KDJ... And it would have been a happy ending if it’d ended at this point.

Except.

REMEMBER THAT INTERLUDE??? YEAH!!!

MY DREAM DIDNT ACTUALLY SHOW ME THE SCENE, BUT I WOKE UP KNOWING THAT YJH DIED CAUSE OF THAT CROSS CONTAMINATION THING!!!!!!! (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ 

Like, the thing that gets me so mad about this ending. IT FITS.

1. It parallels canon!!!!! KDJ tried so hard to give 0th turn a good life, but 0th turn said haha no I choose suffering 😊

2. YJH wanting to meet be with KDJ, no matter the cost

3. It ties in with the interlude??? Hello my brain why are you smarter asleep than when you're awake???

4. It also ties in with that odd power KDJ has to transport items between worlds, which was originally introduced like a goddamn gimmick to ingratiate himself with YJH via the power of modern medicine???

Like. LIKE!! IT FITS!!! SEAMLESSLY!!

BUT IT’S A BAD ENDING!!!

I’m legitimately so upset about this QAQ

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>>> The Good Ending, a fix-it for my own dream, this tastes like betrayal tbh

KDJ decides that he loves MW more than OW and stayed in MW with YJH instead. Happily ever after.

GRUMPS.

[rawrmeansilyindinosawr]

dear you,

you're 26 now and the weight of the world is still on your shoulders. the drugs keep taking up so much of ur life and u don't want it to stop because it makes life more interesting and gives u perspective so what the hell. sobriety's a joke and if you're holier than me you can get the fuck out. you're tired of being small, confused, addicted. to loveless lies. pisces men. staying up all night. you love sleeping in and also having a bedtime. being boring. normal. craving a sense of peace. you're still erratic and wear what you want based on how you want to feel and impulsive but now you count how much everything costs because u knew what it was like to have nothing at all. just a few months ago. and everything's still twisted and sick and sick and twisted but it is what it is and that's exactly how u like it.

you're braver and louder and more rustic and darker. not just the tattoos or the way you dress. everything consolidated into a dark feminine energy, sensual flair, romantic elegant gothic. all black. you don't take another second to wonder if someone down the street needs to get told to shut the fuck up. you want to read more and collect information in ur brain about everything there is to learn about the world and emerge and rly hope you get into that poetry program. there's so many ways that you can choose to go backwards. there's so many easy ways to betray yourself over and over and over again until you feel like there's nothing left.there's so many ways to continue to rot in the molded peach pit of your January lover, waxing crescent, wanning gibbous. some things are not meant to be and you have to accept that. somethings that hurt that feel good when they hurt doesn't mean it's actually good. somethings that U find endearing and poetic to feel don't mean they are feelings that u ought to feel forever. they're just familiar.

last year at 25 you promised yourself to stop smoking cigarettes. you lied. but you don't blame yourself. they feel like ur first love still. and outside of those child like eyes at 26 u realize promises r always gonna be held loosely. n pinky promises can still be broken. like marriage and babies and running away in fast cars with just a jar full of change.

you're still scared of food but you're done romanticizing your youth. scraped skinned bloody knees from falling on cement just to prove u bled. like shedding skin meant transformation. you'll still romanticize passing trains that light up polluted skies, 11:11 wishes, getting tucked in at night, and ring pop proposals that mimic wedding bands, though.

you're ok with sitting in silence and being alone. ok with not having to talk and entertain the crowd, the room. you're confident in how u make a statement either way. you know you're here to open the hearts of others. to make them feel. cuz if there's one reason 2 be alive it's to write. about romance, beauty, memories, love. the eternal things. the things that could break you down, build u up, make u cry.

you're confused why 26 feels more like a commitment to be alive and have a future and that makes u feel neutral. but like u have to kind of swallow that lump in the back of ur throat that says ur gonna do it all wrong or gonna fuck it all up. you flashback now to the time when you were 13 looking in the mirror when the clock stroke midnight and u were waiting for a visible change on ur birthday. it's funny now to think that's all that was to think about change.

you're being more comfortable with who you are, and wanting to share that with others; whether that is dramatic, expressive, way 2 depressive, aggressively over exaggerated....you are never gonna try to make urself small for the comfort of others. shallow u could never be. an ocean u will embody when u reach a million more of these days of birth, these happy birthdays. it feels unreal to have made it another year. I hope it continues to feel good rather than dreadful. I won't blow out my candles this time wishing I was dead, I'll wish for peace of mind. and the strength to live day by day by day by day one day at a time.

[mibkid]

a ramble about an inspirational artist

Ok i’m gonna wax poetic? Uh well maybe more like talk about this one cool artist I really liked a few years back, I’m saying a few years back because sadly the artist is not here on tumblr anymore. 

One of the persona fanartists that I was absolutely obsessed with was an artist called sunflower-frog. They were so cool! Like they had a comic, and a bunch of au’s and everything. What was even cooler was that they had different art styles!

I just felt so inspired by them back then, and weirdly as a fellow artist i felt seen because of that they had different styles. It totally made me feel more confident in trying different things and trying to develop my art while not feeling as pressured with having a one and done style. 

Granted i do still struggle with that idea and i did back then to(probably more than i do now but anyway). Now that is not to say that they didn’t have an art style because they did, it was just that one was more stylized and sharp while the other one was a little more rounder and soft. 

They were just the coolest! 

Wether or not this artist changed names and continued to draw other stuff or not, i do not know, but i hope that whatever this artist is doing now that they’re having fun and hopefully know that they probably inspired a lot more people than just me. 

[adagaium]

Words of Affirmation

does your muse like giving compliments? 

how easy is it for your muse to say ‘ i love you’?

what is one compliment your muse is dying to hear?

what is something your muse loves being praised for?

does your muse like giving compliments? 

honestly, it depends. ardyn isn't very straightforward with things, and in terms of romance, he's rather stunted with anyone not aera- but he will give compliments where they are due. often, he will praise skills rather than physical things, because honestly, he's also willing to butter people up- but only for things that are true. he's not going to compliment people just for no reason, and not for something untrue.

how easy is it for your muse to say ‘ i love you’? ( also asked by @aceparagon )

uh. not easy lmao. and that's for multiple reasons. one, ardyn likes waxing poetic- three words isn't going to do it, he needs to come up with the most extra way to say he loves someone- he also loves hearing himself talk so the more he can say the better. the second reason is ardyn has trust issues. even with his relationship with aera, it wasn't love at first sight- they were children when they met and they hated each other and fought rather adamantly against the arranged marriage, because they both wanted to fall in love naturally. they did, and that's great, but this point remains true. ardyn needs time to warm up to someone- a lot more now that he's also so bitter about everything.

what is one compliment your muse is dying to hear? ( also asked by aceparagon! )

ok ardyn isn't really ... ever expecting compliments? as he is currently, he thinks they'd be mostly people trying to kiss ass, and in the past, he wasn't doing what he did so he would get compliments? so he's not really sure what he'd want to hear on that front...

what is something your muse loves being praised for?

this ties in with the above, ardyn isn't doing things for praise, be it as the healer of the people or as the harbinger of darkness. but, deep down, he'd like to have someone tell him that what he's done is enough- that he doesn't have to break himself for others- he wants a form of security. he'll never say that out loud, ever.

[sydneyofalltrades]

wooooo so building off the stuff i said before he would probably wax poetic about how sad he was before actually learning how to be mentally stable (some what) and then with a huge twist of shakesperean tragedy him and most of his loved ones are now dead. i imagine that his lament would sort of be like a reverse of what the world needs plus noel being dramatic. very artsy and all that good stuff and just super playing into the novelist and poet vibes but also clinging to that thing of noel to be honest not seeming really upset about dying (just my personal views on his character) during the musical and just framing it as an event from a book or one of his fantasies because no matter what he will never be functional.

ok im done ranting idk if i explained this well but my idea :]

Ooh I love it. The full details of this could deffo be explored and I absolutely adore this idea thanks! :D