#ok thanks for coming to my ted talk about to go lose my mind !!!!

[wexhappyxfew]

you don’t know pain until you’ve finished reading the last book in one of your favorite childhood series and are in a copious amount of tears and unbridled nostalgia

[ashbye]

Ok I'm sorry but if I see one more story labeled x reader and when I go to read it your fugly ass OC named 'nicole' or 'bridget' are in there IM GONNA LOSE MY FUCKING MIND! THAT IS NOT X READER! I know some of you could say "well just switch it out with your name"

NO I WILL NOT! ITS ABOUT THE PRINCIPLE OF FALSE ADVERTISING! STOP IT!

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

And if you are one of the people that does this... I will find you and it will not be pretty

No hate to you if your name is nicole or bridget those re just examples

[everseens]

PSA below along with just a dumb rant lol!!! i might delete this later jksdfkjhdsjfsd but to sum it up basically i'm going to drop a big chunk of my threads again. more clarification below but basically plots that aren't rlly going anywhere or i'm just not interested in i won't interact with anymore. this blog will also probably be more selective with replies from now on :) please reach out to me if u wanna start anything new though, always open to trying out new stuff!

this is kind of a rant but my muse is starting to get at an all time low and i'm realizing it's because of the lack of direction in some of my threads. this isn't necessarily a reflection on anyone else but i tend to lose muse easily if there's not mutual interest in a plot or if the other person isn't putting effort into the thread or plot (or even if the thread doesn't seem to be developing at all whatsoever). if your preference is not plotting and random one line starters/threads, thats ok!! i don't mind starting there, but it's always so much more fun for me to develop the story with the mun rather than be in the dark the entire time about how they might develop. i love developing backstories for plots and sending muse posts back and forth, and i feel like lately i haven't really found that with writing partners here. which is totally fine, like i said whatever u prefer is up to u but for me a lack of direction or development makes me lose muse heavily. anyway this is a dumb rant i might delete later but i think overall it rlly sucks putting a lot of effort into a plot just to not get that back! like when i get excited about a pairing but there's not much of that excitement in return idk makes me feel a bit silly tbh sfdjskhfjkds like whys it lowkey embarrassing? DSJKFSDJKHFSDJK anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk

[euclydya]

CHARACTER BINGO FOR THOSE MARKERPLIER CHARACTERS MAYHAPZ

YOUUUUU DIDN'T SPECIFY SO WE DID A LOT HAHSSJDHDHSHDHFH

So before we start these r all very Much biased bc plurality . we tried 2 stick to how we feel abt the source characters but uh.... ANYWAYS,

all under the cut let's go

where DO i even start. ok. he's Lirerally just a dude (... Debatable. /joke) and that makes him So Funny . New Guy Just Dropped: literally just a haunted house's Angry Humansona. He's on a mission to Kill (justified) but he's gotta do a trillion side quests first and they're all Be Gay Do Crime. Before WKM and therefore His Lore™ dropped i think all we knew abt him was what happened in ADWM which is even funnier. 3 fuckign people get trapped in a meatsuit and they're like "what's the bEst way 2 get revenge" and apparently the first step is to go seduce people about it. Gay Rights 😃👍!

Our take abt Dark is that Mark did a Damn Good Job At Accidental Plural Representation! This Man Is A Fucking System!! Litcherqlly the trauma-endo system OF ALL time thnk u fr coming 2 my Ted Talk .

woulj not want 2 meet irl on account of would also probably fucking kill us <3

HE...... THEE BUBBLEGUM BASTARD OF ALL TIME.

ok after everything in WKM literally he deserves to kill too. Man fucking lost all his friends and got blamed for one of their deaths (which . Listen to me. Not his fucking fault but we'll get into that Later,) and watched as the DA fuckin g fell to their death and then GOT UP. AND WALKED AWAY*. Like. Listen to me.

If my fuckign life went from being pretty cool to absolute hell within the span of like 2 days i too would lose my mind and then change my identity completely and be convinced that everything is a joke. I too would be pink abt it btw pink is gender as hell.

(*by this point it wasn't Exactly the DA but Dark but whatever THE POINT STILL STANDS!)

Now we would absolutely not want to meet him if he were real IRL . Shit would go fucky and we'd be dead almost immediately. no thank u HFJDJSJDN

THIS FUCKING GUY!!!!!!!!!! OK,

So The Host has like zero canon whatsoever. And. That sucks. BuT! What very very few appearances he has are very cool and he looks cool and we think he's neat. Also he should get to kill too I think almost everyone should get to kill :3c

I would not want 2 meet him bc he can narrate shit into existence and that is terrifying. God blees. <3

THIS!!!!!!!!! MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!

the man the myth the reason why dark exists the reason why wil is the way he is etc. etc. etC.!!!!!!!!

he scares me. JEHWJDJFDJJSJFDIDISI. he's a huge jackass canonically and literally planned his death like What on god. But anyways!!! From a character standpoint he's so cOOL!!!!! like hello!!! literally did all that shit bc his wife cheated on him with his bestie iirc which WHAT the fuck <3. ok <3. Divorce exists but gO off dude!

So this is where shit gets... Less abt The Canon Character and more very biased sys-wise. Cuz our Actor is the funniest fuckign guy ever I think and I don't think he realizes it. Dude fucking exploded something in the headspace once and just said "Clown for the dount" before leaving front for 1-2 months straight and that lives rent free in our head forever.

Like. We all think he's gr8 here lmao he's helped us a lot so far with day to day shit. But he's also way fucking different than source!Actor is so ?? dhajKxjfjsn.

Anyways we would not want 2 meet source!Actor bc he'd probably also try to kill us <3. tl;dr he's a WONDERFUL villain and a well written character tbh. I want to canonically see Dark rip him 2 shreds.

:D so this uhhh. So this is 10000% system bias. Uhhhhhhhh. Ummmm.

I can't explain this one except I'm gay and literally our Google fictive is my bf in-sys LMFAO -Marvin✨

wait actually i Can explain a bit hold on.

I/we think people forget tht he's like. Mainly a hater. Dude popped into existence and was almost Immediately bitter about everything. He Is A Sarcastic Jackass. He Is Not A Helpful Man. He literally wants one thing and that is to destroy mankindJFJSKSKFJFKDJ

With that being said if canon!Google existed irl anywhere near us we r running away. He Would Kill Us. JSHSJDJFMFFJJDJSJF

[angstandhappiness]

INTERESTING

OP's tags @imminent-danger-came #THINK OF THE TRADGEDY#Wukong seeing MK act a little bit evil in 1x09: uh hold up no stop that#When he realizes it was just MK trying to be good enough: :0

@mythicalmagical-monkeyman #THINK OF THE TRADGEDY#< prev tags#to good to leave out#Yes!#exactly#thank you for putting my tiny strains of thoughts into actual word

@imminent-danger-came #wish I could be normal about anything ever#instead I write an in-depth theory post on why I think MK was fucked up in his past life#COME ON s4 SPECIAL. PROVE ME RIGHT#GIVE ME CRUMBS#THIS WOULD SLAP SO HARD#DO IT FOR ME#this ain't even mentioning the god damn curse#Cause like bro. The curse reacting to MK (being a part of MK?) the way it does is so fucking weird#Why did MK get a flash of it in 4x03. Why#''harbinger of chaos'' WELL MAYBE HE WAS ONE. MAYBE HE WAS.#eamk theory

@imminent-danger-came #YEAH ELDRITCH HORROR MK IS SYNONYMOUS WITH MONKEY DEMON MK#Tis the same thing. MK is a Monkey Demon and nothing can change that#Some good points here teehee#I think I'm on team ''pre-stone MK was a complete force of utter chaos'' but like.#A pre-stone MK being controlled and curated as a weapon is a really fun idea#Would have great Samadhi fire Mei parallels too#''Don't use the flame Mei...be the flame!'' ''You don't use a weapon! You are a weapon!''#''What if I fail everyone? What if I...lose control?'' ''Actually no no—the chaos and destruction that we'll bring upon the world will make#Wukong's past look like nothing''#Like at the VERY least MK was someone in a past life right. Like#It would be weird if he didn't. Literally every other member of the gang does#And everyone in this show is living past the end of their myth one way or another#anyways I'm so sorry tumblr ate your post#I've lost good men in tumblr drafts

@its-leethee #ok so i had this rb window open since yesterday cause i needed to sleep on it but nope time did not calm me down#my brain soundtrack stuck on eeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEE#always wondering where did mk's power come from & what they put in the baby monkey stone and like y'all are so smart eight steps ahead of m#sealed monkey demon/eldritch horror mk alright alright i'm in 100%

@mythicalmagical-monkeyman #...#what if he's the thing that killed the pilgrims#he would have been powerful enough to#and it would help explain why Wukong was involved#and why mk would be friends with their “reincarnations���#/descendant#because parallels

@ghostenluvs #prev#OH MY GOD#ur brain#but omg that would be so angsty #THIS WHOLE THEORY IS CRAZY BUT IN LIKE AN OMG WAY#LIKE MAN I'M HAVING THOUGHTS NOW#i love these long theory posts they get hte brain thoughts going#IT KEEPS GETTING BETTER

@i-am-a-fan #Do you think that’s why Mk is only part monkey demon? Because i can two schools of thought on that#one. he’s part SWK and part something else (probably celestial if i’m honest) but that would explain why he’s able to wield the staff#it also makes sense since the staff is has been said to only be wielded by swk himself#there’s no trials or anything of being worthy like thors hammer. you either are swk or you aren’t#Or TWO. MK WAS another celestial monkey#i say WAS because he might have been defeated and the put back together as seen in the frames shown above#Mostly because i really do think MK when broken down is actually really evil#I WILL ONCE AGAIN USE THE CLONE EPISODE AS EVIDENCE#you’re telling me that every clone made of the guy#that are supposed to be perfect imitations of the creator (mind you)#all of them. turned evil?#yeah that kid is fucked up#wow i had wayyyy more to say than i thought i did#welcome to my ted talk

@void-multimuse #stuff like this makes my brain go brrr so I wanna add it to my MK portrayal

@mythicalmagical-monkeyman #saw this on twitter#but this goes with inky going#"your friends will turn on you. seeing you for the monster you will become. they will DESTROY you#harbinger of chaos.”#because if MK killed them in their past lives#why would they keep him around if he could do it again#(I know they wouldn't though)

@wilyzombie #yall i just wanted to watch a cartoon with fun animation#it’s been only 2 weeks since i first started watching monkie kid#and now im obsessed

@newcyber-demonslayer#YO#WAIT#THIS IS ACTUALLY SUCH A GREAT THEORY#probably cause I’m a sucker for eldritch beings cause it fascinates me#especially the possible design options out there

@demigod-of-the-agni #op this was a DELICIOUS READ#i will now retreat to my cave and wallow#monkerkidd#SO MANY THOUGHTS.... SO MANY.......

@shiwinu #SOMEONE SAID#“CRAZY THEORY”#???#I'M IN#AHHAHAHAJAJA

Eldritch Abomination MK Theory

OKAY. @the-punning-ubus

I just want to say reading these tags are SO validating, because I have my little "MK was an eldritch abomination thing pre-hatching from stone" theory and seeing someone else come to pretty much the same conclusion feels good.

I've been meaning to write a proper theory post on this for a while, so now is as good of a time as any!

Obviously we have Wukong's "Not just anyone can wield my staff, but you did" from A Hero is Born and "The staff's just a big 'ol stick bud! It takes someone special to wield it" from 3x03, but there's also something in 1x09 Macaque:

Macaque: "Your staff kinda gives you away dude, not just anyone can wield that thing."

-

Macaque: "Ohohoh no, can't you hold the magic staff anymore? Well, you know what that means—there really isn't anything special about you. You're just a kid with a heavy stick."

-

-

The sweet irony of "There really isn't anything special about you. You're just a kid with a heavy stick!" followed immediately by MK lifting the staff again is not lost on me.

So, from s1 it was pretty obvious that Wukong didn't "give" MK any form of power, but we knew that already with MK being a monkey demon and all. I just think it's particularly intriguing that all of this was laid out in the same episode where MK proclaims "I am the weapon!". In all honestly, he probably was/is.

One of the main questions coming out of s4 is "why was MK created?"—Monkey King's stone was used to form another, but for what purpose? To what end? What reason was MK at the center of all these stories?

Well, here's my current theory:

MK was something in a past life, and that something needed to be contained—and so, to put a stop to past life eldritch abomination MK, he was then sealed away in the stone.

I think this scene in particular raises some alarm bells:

The stone cracks open, bursts with light, and then it closes—like something was put inside it. The scene could of course just be an aesthetic choice, or chosen to be this way for another reason we don't know yet, but it just feels so deliberate. A ball of light appearing from the stone, then another ball of light in the mystery woman's hands being revealed to hold a monkey, and then the stone reforming around the ball of light. I just can't help but feel there's something there.

Next I want to discuss the two key things that make me feel this theory has merit:

1.) MK has made a habit of breaking out of things he shouldn't be able to (the calabash in 1x05, the trigram furnace in 2x00, the scroll in 4x07, Destiny itself in 3x14) and the stone would be no exception.

2.) Every antagonist in this show has been sealed away in some form, then being released to resume their plans from before being sealed. Here's a list:

DBK was sealed under the mountain, and after being released continued his plan of world domination.

Spider Queen was metaphorically trapped in her fallen empire, and after being given the chance to rule the above world once again, immediately takes it.

The Lady Bone Demon was imprisoned in her tomb, and after being released prematurely (before learning the error of her ways), she continued her plan to destroy the world and create a new one.

Azure Lion was imprisoned in the scroll, and upon being released (by an unknown 3rd party), immediately worked to free his friends and then end the Jade Emperor's reign.

Now, I love foils, so MK breaking out of the stone he was sealed in, yet coming out an actually changed being unlike everyone else in this show, would be DELICIOUS:

Lady Bone Demon: ”No backup and no weapon? So, you’re plan is to fist fight a child?” Sun Wukong: “We both know that’s not what you are.”

(3x11 This Imperfect World)

-

Lady Bone Demon: "STOP! Have you forgotten? Destroy me and you destroy the host! Have you become so desperate to end me that you would sacrifice this blameless innocent child?" Sun Wukong: "You're giving me no choice! All the time you spent locked away, and you haven't changed a bit! I'm going to finish you, like I should have done a long time ago! I told you—you should have stayed buried."

(3x11 This Imperfect World)

-

Subodhi: "I have not brought you to your master. Although this is the stone from which Sun Wukong once sprung, it appears overtime, it was used to form another. A simple creature, with no past, no family, and no name. There is a reason you were at the center of these stories—a reason you can harness the power of the Monkey King himself!"

(4x06 Show Me the Monster)

-

(If you want extra fodder for this, please see this parallels post :3)

So, if MK were to hatch out of the stone—where *he* was sealed away—and he actually came out of it a "blameless innocent child" with "no past, no family, and no name", it would work exceedingly well. Wukong's not above giving people second chances, but if you use that second chance to try and destroy the world, you force his hand.

(Side note: it could also be the case that the stone was used to "reset" whatever MK was in his past life, and Wukong was originally meant to destroy whatever came out of the stone—which could be the reason he stayed at Flower Fruit Mountain for hundreds of years. However, when an child came out, a new being without a past or the memories of what it was before—Wukong choose to let it go. He choose to let it live a normal life—or even ensuring it could live a normal life—and it then found it's way to Pigsy. This definitely gets into real crack theory territory, but I did want to bring it up.)

Now, none of this is even mentioning the suspiciously MK shaped figure in the mural from 3x13:

Now, the figure in this mural is only shown when MK is also on screen, which is framing that drives me insane. Perhaps this is when they first caught MK's past life, then finally able to subdue him and seal him in the stone.

And so, if MK really was this terrible chaos driven abomination in his past life, what does that mean ✨thematically✨?

Well,

Sun Wukong: “Point is, mistakes happen, but so long as you leave the world in better shape than you found it, then it’s all good. Right?”

(4x01 Familiar Tales)

-

SWK: “ENOUGH! I’ve never let anyone dictate my destiny in the past, and I’m not about to start now. None of us are! We can’t change who we were yesterday or in a past life, or a hundred life times ago! We live with the choices we’ve made, for what matter is the choices we make RIGHT NOW! Only we decide who we are and what we do with the power we have.”

(4x07 Pitiful Creatures)

-

MK can't change who he was in a past life. He can't change that the roads all lead to pain. But you know what he can do? He can try. He can try and get a little bit better every day. He can try and help people. He can try and make the world better than he found it.

Maybe in a past life, MK caused just as must chaos and destruction as Wukong did in his past. Maybe he caused even more problems than he has as the Monkie Kid. But that also doesn't undo the good he's doing now.

Anyways, that's my "MK was an eldritch abomination thing pre-hatching from stone" theory. Hope you enjoyed

[jaeewon]

:^/

[supernaturalgirl20]

Love to Hate you

Part 5

Pairings: Max Phillips x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, explicit, unprotected sex, oral (both receiving), angst, mentions of drinking blood, cursing, enemies to lovers.

Summary: You and Max have been working together for the last year and there is only one thing you have in common - you both hate each other! Now you are both in competition with each other for Ted’s job. Who will win? Who will lose? Will you both realise that’s there’s a fine line between love and hate?

Part 4

Comments and reblog really appreciated 🥰

Co-Written with @misspearly1

Max insisted on driving and honestly, you were grateful - your anxiety was becoming overwhelming and you would not have had the focus to drive safely.

Fidgeting with your fingers - something you did to try to calm yourself when you were like this, you closed your eyes briefly and took a deep breath inwards, trying to calm your racing heart. Please let this day go off without an incident from Dad.

Max threw a sideways glance at you, a worrisome feeling settling in the pit of his stomach with what he had just heard in your mind - he’s never seen you like this - and it wasn’t something he wanted to get used to either.

“Everything ok, toots? You seem a little on edge.” Opening your eyes and looking in his direction, you gave him your best fake smile. “I’m fine, promise.”

“Hmm, and if I believed that, I’d believe anything.” Max narrowed his eyes on the road and insisted that you share what's on your mind without trying to pry it out of you. “Come on, you can talk to me, Toots. I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye but I care about you and I want to help if I can.”

“I appreciate it, Max, I do, but you can’t help me. My family - more specifically my father - is a fucking pain in my ass and he hates me.”

“Come on he doesn’t hate you, parents don’t hate their kids - they can get angry, sure, disappointed, but not hate.”

“Ha, you don’t know my father. I’ve never been able to do anything right, not in his eyes anyway.” The words spilled from your mouth like it was normal, it was normal and it shouldn’t be, but it’s something that you’re used to now.

“Then why don’t we just say fuck it and not go. I’ll drive us anywhere?” Max countered with a different idea, a much better idea than attending this wedding that you’ve dreaded for months. If only it were that easy.

“I can’t. The irony of it all is that I'm constantly seeking his approval and if I don’t show up - I’ll be disowned.” Shooting down the suggestion, Max reaches over and places his hand on your thigh, giving it a quick squeeze. “I could just kill him?”

Erupting into a fit of giggles, it really shouldn’t have been funny but your emotions were all over the place. You’re laughing so hard that you could barely see Max through your watery eyes. God, I love you.

The laughter died off with that thought, amusement had been replaced with another worry. You were so caught up in the moment that you forgot that he can listen in if he wants to, so the question was, did he hear it?

Max is frozen. He definitely heard it and he kept his eyes straight ahead with doubt circling his mind. Did she just say what I think she said?

***

Arriving at the venue - an overpriced hotel with too many sparkly chandeliers - you take a deep breath before exiting the car. Max appears at your side, wrapping an arm around your waist as you both make your way inside.

Fake smiles and formal greetings are made as you pass distant relatives and family friends; people that you only ever see at events like this. Max can already hear your heart begin to beat fast again and he leans down to whisper in your ear, “it’s ok, breath, I’ve got you.”

Fuck! If you didn't already love the man, you certainly would after that. A simple yet meaningful gesture of reassurance in a time that you really needed it made you feel weak in the knees. You smile up at him with appreciative eyes. “Thanks, for coming with me. I’m glad you're here, Max.”

There’s that flutter in his chest again and he battles with himself silently. Say it! Say it now before you lose your nerve. “There you are, you're late.” Max’s thoughts of saying what's on his mind were halted as he followed your gaze to see an older man approaching - small, slightly rounded stomach and the only resemblance you have to him are your eyes. Those gorgeous eyes that Max loves so much.

“We're not late, half the guests haven’t even arrived yet by the looks of it.” You defended yourself and Max to your Dad, but he fired back. “Don’t take that tone with me-” Your father stopped mid sentence, looking at Max with scrutiny, “-and who is this?”

Immediately taking action, the vampire moves his hand from around you and goes to shake his hand, making sure to squeeze tight. Your fathers face scrunches in pain a little before you nudge his side. “I’m Max Phillips, Y/N’s boyfriend. It’s a pleasure to meet your sir.” He doesn’t say anything as he turns his gaze back to you. “Your boyfriend can’t sit up front with us.”

“Why not?” You realtialted, to which your father retorted. “He isn’t family.” Your blood boiled with the audacity of this man and you fought back, again. “Max is my boyfriend, he’s my family.”

“He still can’t sit with us,” your father states before getting distracted by some guests, turning away from you and ending this discussion. I’m going to fucking kill him. You try to storm after him but Max wraps his arms around your waist, stopping you. “He isn’t worth it baby. How about you go sit with them and I’ll find a seat at the back.”

“Hell no! I’m sitting with you, come on.” You wrap your hand in his and pull him along to the back where you take your seats. Max can’t help the smile that spreads across his face. I am so fucking proud of you.

***

The ceremony is beautiful. Your sister is a stunning bride and her husband Gerry absolutely adores her. Even though you’ve always been the shadow in her light, constantly compared against each other, you're happy for her. “Ever thought about it?” Max whispers in your ear as you make your way to the reception hall.

“Though about what?” You asked. Turning to face him as he jerked his chin outwards with his answer, “This. Marriage?”

“Hasn’t every girl at some point.” He gives you an incredulous look and you roll your eyes with a half smile on your face. “Ok yes, I’ve thought about my wedding. Happy?”

“Yup.” He turns his attention away from you to the sign displaying the seating arrangements. What the hell, why is he asking that? “Have you thought about it, Max?”

The man laughs, sounding shy. “Not until recently.” What? He grabs your hand and leads the way to your table. Even though Max doesn’t need food to survive - for obvious reasons - he still has a few mouthfuls. I need to blend in sometimes toots he’d said, and you couldn’t help but smile at the concentration on his face as tried to act like a regular sociable human.

I could get used to this, you thought and ducked your head, forgetting once again that he can hear you. Though, Max looked at you, as if he were about to say something but a voice cut him off. “Y/N! There you are, I’m so happy you came. I know this was hard for you so I appreciate it.” Your sister - the bride was the voice that cut him off.

Pulling you in for a tight hug with a bright smile, she’s breath-taking, always has been. “Claire, this is Max my..”

“Her boyfriend,” he speaks for himself with a wink before pulling Claire in for a hug too.

“It’s lovely to meet you Max,” She beams, then pulls back to look at you, “my sister failed to tell her little sister she was dating. Don’t pay any attention to our father, he can be…well difficult. Anyway, better go mingle. Don’t leave without saying goodbye, ok?”

“I won’t.” Max nodded as the bride walked away. “She seems nice.” You glared at him then. “Well she’s married now, so hard luck.” Max looks at you with a confused expression. Without questioning it, he simply listens to your inner monologue instead. Everyone always thinks she is better than me - funnier, smarter, prettier. Of course Max would think the same.

“Yeah she’s pretty, I’d be lying if I said otherwise but in a cute way.” Acting quickly, Max tells you what you need to hear, “Definitely not my type. You are my type. You’re not cute, you’re gorgeous, you don’t put up with my shit and put me in my place, and you are amazing in bed. You do this thing with your…”

“Ok enough.” You say putting your hand over his mouth, a blush on your face. “Thank you.”

As the day progressed, your nerves slowly easing off with Max’s soothing presence and reassuring gestures, you started to actually enjoy the celebratory atmosphere and put your own worries aside, to be there for your sister.

Occasionally she and Gerry would lock eyes with you, raising their glasses with a nod and almost every time, your father would scowl. When dinner was served, you and Max just enjoyed your own company, giggling at his remarks about your dad. The champagne helped a bunch too, loosening up the tension in your body and mind.

“I need to take a leak, toots,” Max kissed your cheek and pushed his chair back to stand, “I’ll be back shortly.” Sitting alone with just your thoughts, you concluded that this day wasn’t all too bad and you were thankful that Max accompanied you, he made it better in every way possible.

However, with a quick glance over to the head table and noticing that your dad was not there, you instantly sighed with a plea under your breath, “Please Max, if my dad is in the restroom, don’t cause a scene.” Using his absence as an opportunity, you stood from your chair also and walked over to chat with your sister and brother in law.

“Hey, you. Getting lonely over there?” She leaned up from her seat, opening her arms wide for another hug. “Yeah, you could say that. Max is in the restroom,” you smiled and leaned in, kissing her cheek. “Please tell me Dad is at the bar?”

Pulling back and greeting Gerry, the look on your sister's face confirmed your worries and you immediately started fidgeting with your fingers again. “Stop that,” Clair noticed your anxiety straight away, she always does, “and don’t worry. I’m sure Dad won’t cause a scene on my wedding day.”

It’s not Dad that I’m worried about. Nodding to her, you put on yet another fake smile and kept looking to the gents restroom, dreading for Max to reappear with blood dripping down from his fangs, but to your absolute surprise, the men walked out together - laughing?

Both you and Claire shared a look of concern, and even Gerry voiced his opinion on the sight, “Huh. That’s weird, a minute ago he wouldn’t shut up about Max now they’re best buddies.”

“Oh that’s good old Max. He has a way with… charming people,” Laughing to the couple nervously, you made an excuse to leave and go back to your own table while Max and your father stood at the bar, ordering a round of drinks and being rowdy about it. This can’t be good. What have you done Max?

The man turned to look at you with your thoughts, winking with a cheeky smile before turning his attention back to your dad. Clearly he has glamoured him, put him under some sort of compulsion. Though, you can’t complain considering how happy and laid back he looked, so Max must have said something right.

A couple moments later, Max came to join you at the table again, your father walking past with a waving smile and a glass of whiskey in his hand. No, you certainly can't complain about the compulsion, he’s in a better mood.

“You’re not going to ask about your dad?” Max sat down and leaned into your side, placing a chaste kiss to your cheek. “No.” keening at his touch, your hands roamed the expanse of his thigh beneath the table cloth. “Don’t need to know, just really grateful for the result, Max.”

“Oh yeah? How grateful?” He smirked. Tensing with the touch of your deft fingers trailing up his thigh, Max hummed deeply and whispered sweet nothings against the shell of your ear, drawing out a soft sigh to escape past your lips. “I’ll show you later in the bedroom,” you say, biting your lip. “I’ll do that thing that you love.”

Max groaned eagerly, his gaze was intense with impatience for the night to hurry up and come to an end. You gave his thigh a quick squeeze before retracting your hand at the sounds of a microphone being tapped excessively, followed by someone speaking into the thing. “Can everybody hear me ok?”

Marc, the best man, prepared his speech. You and Max paid little attention as his hand kept sneaking up your thigh now, payback for your actions mere moments ago. Marc went on to talk about his younger days with Gerry, specifically of the time where he first met your sister and how he knew that his buddy was in love at first sight.

You did finally pay attention when your father made snide remarks here and there, fueled by alcohol no less. Or was it? As Max nipped a path of kisses along your neck, without a care for who sees, your eyes narrowed in on Gerry, on his red angry facial expression.

When he snapped his head to the side to reprimand your dad quietly, you knew something else was going on. It wasn’t just the alcohol. “Um, Max?” Tilting your head with a quiet whisper, you now want to know exactly what the vampire had done. “What did you say to my dad in the restroom?”

“Told him to relax, have a good time…” Placing a wet kiss to the back of your ear, your eyes threatened to roll shut as his hand inched closer to your heat. “...Told him to squash whatever quarrels he has with you and let bygones be bygones.”

“Uh-huh.” That didn’t sound too bad. However, it didn’t explain why your dad was being a bit of a dick about the best man's speech, so you persisted with Max. “Anything else you might've said to him that you’re not telling me?”

“Hmm,” Max smirked against your skin. “Let’s say it’s my gift for you. A little payback.”

Just as you were opening your mouth to protest, you stopped to gasp when the man had made contact with your core, finding your panties hot and damp. Max’s touch had a much more prominent effect on you, far more than you yourself anticipated it would.

A broken whisper of his name bubbled up from your throat as he started to pull your panties to one side. Your cunt clenched around nothing as he slid a digit through your slick folds with ease. “Look at you, toots. So wet for me and I barely touched you.” Max degraded with a dark chuckle, pulling his hand back, you whimpered with the loss as he brought his finger to his lips and sucked the evidence of your desire.

At the sound of music filling your ears, you tore your eyes away from Max’s dark taunting smile and looked to the dancefloor. Claire and Gerry were rising from their seats and walking out hand in hand. It was the first dance and it couldn’t have come at a better time, Max was becoming feral. You’ve seen that look in his eyes before.

Max wrapped an arm around your waist, resting his hand to your hip with a grabbing squeeze and you leaned into his touch with a question. “Are you finished teasing me now?”

“Not even close, baby.” The man laughed. Looking at the dancefloor as cool as a cucumber, like he hasn’t just had his hand between your legs then tasted a sample of your juices off his finger, Max jerked his chin outwards, “But first we have a show to watch.”

“Don’t you mean the first dance? It isn’t a show Max,” You corrected him, jabbing a finger into his ribs playfully as your own little payback for him playing games with you. Giggling to yourself when he jolted with the action, he repaid the favour by tickling your sides, causing your hands to reach out onto his chest with a plea, “Ok-ok. I yield. Please stop that.”

Granting your wishes, Max resorted to just resting his hand on your hip again, but he brought his other hand up from under the table to look at his watch, sparking your intrigue, “What’s up?”

“I told you, we have a show to watch,” Max replied nonchalantly, “Patience, babe. Your gift is coming any minute now.” Instantly turning your head to face the head table, your father was not there and your stomach dropped with dread. Oh God, Max what have you done?

***

The sound of a mic tap draws your attention and you look up to see your father on stage looking around nervously. “Stop! Stop right now.”

Everyone gasps at your fathers interruption. Gerry is being pulled back by Claire who whispers something to him. “That’s it Claire, tame that beast of a husband. Bloody sham of a wedding. Cost me a fortune, ungrateful bitch. I need everyone to quieten down, I have something I want to say to my daughter, Y/N.”

You can feel people's eyes drift to you and a worrisome feeling settles in the pit of your stomach. Max’s hand - the one resting on your thigh - squeezes gently in reassurance and you meet his gaze for the briefest moment before turning back to your father. Max hopes he’s done the right thing. That you won’t hate him after this.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the way I’ve always treated you. For making you feel like you were never good enough and always comparing you to your sister Claire. You are far better than her in every way. You’re beautiful, strong willed, independent and amazing at your job and any man would be lucky to have you.”

“John!” You hear your mother gasp out in outrage. The only thing you can focus on though is Max. How these are his words coming from your fathers mouth and how you want nothing more than to grab his face and kiss him hard. I love you. You let the words linger in your mind, knowing full well he can hear but you don’t look at him, you don’t want to see the rejection on his face.

Suddenly your father drops to his knees and starts barking. Barking! He begins to move around on all fours, licking himself and sniffing some of the guests' asses. He throws himself onto his back and waggles his arms and legs in the air - looking for a belly rub?

Your hand shoots to your mouth and Max looks to you now, worried he’s gone too far but then he feels you shake beside him. Is she laughing? You can’t control it anymore, the laughter falling from your mouth as you hold your stomach. Max feels a sense of relief. “Did I do good?”

“That was amazing. I love you…” You gasp, having realised you said it out loud. It’s out there now and you can feel him stiffen beside you. Tears form behind your eyes threatening to fall at any moment. Well done, you’ve ruined it all now. Max’s hand grabs your chin and suddenly his lips are on yours, kissing you passionately. “I need you, now.”

“Let’s get out of here.” Max stands and reaches for your hand, leading you out to reception. “I need a room for the night.” What is he doing? Max leans into you - his breath hot on your skin. “I want you to fuck you so hard, everyone in that reception hall knows who you belong to.” A shiver runs through you and your cunt is aching with anticipation. Oh yes please.

Part 6

Permanent tag list: @lunaserenade @anaaaispunk @maievdenoir @elinedjarin @seasonschange-butpeopledont @alberta-sunrise @dihra-vesa @pintsizemama @athalien @loserrlauraa @thorins-queen-of-erebor @pascal-rascal424 @ikinmahlen @pascalisthepunkest @dindjarinneedsahug @almaeunice @jediknight122 @prostitute-robot-from-the-future @colorlesswhispersunknown @stevie75 @rosie-posie08 @hauntedmama @greeneyedblondie44 @prettylilhalforc @giselatropicana @phoenixhalliwell @sherala007 @its--fandom--darling @donnaa @javierpinme @luxmundee @littlemisspascal @hayley-the-comet @ezras-channel-rat @misspearly1 @writer-darling @misspearlssideblog @sara-alonso @loonymagizoologist @harriedandharassed @faithiegirl01

[voidtoufu]

woo! being waiting for this

so here me out, it's like cheese and maggots

(non derogatory, i love being a little worm)

sometimes when u make cheese u get maggots

it just happens sometimes but theres things u can do to swing this or that way distrasticly, but also ways where things are already swayes

not everyone who eats cheese likes maggot and/or maggot cheese and viceversa

some go "WTF, WHY!"

and others are fine with it, might even enjoy it

some might rather just have some cheese, or skip it and go straight for some lovely brain worms

personally i know that being in something greater than myself that is so unique which i get to understand so intamately which understands me the same way is good for art

and even tho my entire existence has been with "overgrown mind"s i know also that life is inherently more complicated this way

i want to be able to write, draw, sing, create and let it just be that, im amazed by plurality everytime it reveals more of itself to us,

but if my creativity comes with the prize that it has to be channeled thru this unfortunate thing that is me and my mind's tendencies, fine

if the universe wouldn't let us just be without the darkside of stars murmuring pantheons into our souls, fine

if i can't feel loved and seen with the gaze of those that are beyond conventional physical, wounderful

but selfishly, i wanna control my life, there is a want to control who i meet, who i have to live with, and maybe thats valid

there will always be more of me for the ones i care for, but only so much for myself

all my ideas learns to speak back when i ask them, but only we are sapient, and nobody can really control who exactly we are

the conversations r some of the most day to day events for us now but thinking about it makes it eary in comparison to convention (and pretty funny)

"so why did u blow up the big corpo sky scraper"

"idk something about losing lov-"

"areyousapient"

"no"

".... cool cool"

its kinda hard to exprience senarios where u had no say of entering and having to discard of them when they feel so real, and i guess some people don't

but Imma be a "destrwawer of univwerses" cus u know, i wanna focus on my ACTUAL HEADMATES, AND MY ACTUAL LIFE

don't get me wrong creativity buzzin bussin

but if it screws us over, imma make it a corpearl form so i can say "f@ck u" with my finger in their face (yea no, im on that heavy compium, they're kicking my ass)

i think if there's gonna be more of us, that fine, whatever way the come and why, doesn't really matter

but pls can i just do an ao3 and not change the trajectory of ourlife pls

at the end of all this, whether u don't really need to think of this or u just let it be or u are a war criminal in system guilty of mass murder (jk, jk, JK!)

do the thing where u love everything, makes thinking easier

or not i don't like giving advices

thanks for coming to my TED (today's existencial delerium) talk

ps, this individual ramble prone brain worm also exprience psychosis and intrusive thoughts so that probably has to do something about it all, plus shaking hands and a disconnected that process so really thx for reading all that

ok im done pouring my heart out imma go curl into a ball

Please reblog, I don't have many followers so very few people will see this. I've been struggling with writing lately because sometimes the ocs and alters get confusing. Anything anyone wants to share would be helpful!

[woahajimes]

the batfamily is stupid as hell and they're self isolating because SOMEBODY got covid (steph) and then SOMEBODY (cass-- who also has covid bc uh stephcass) sneezed on tim who drank from jason's cup without knowing it was jason's cup and anyways everyone in the manor got covid so ✨self isolation for 2 weeks✨

ANYHOW they were all bored out of their minds and jason was about to throw damian out the window bc siblings right

SO BASICALLY cass came up with the big brain idea of a competition (prize being complete immunization of sibling interaction UNLESS they ask for it-- eg. "hey can you open this for me")

teams were made (just two people per team-- duke/damian, jason/cass, steph/harper, dick/tim)

there were "rounds" and these consisted of

round 1: person a has to feed person b a whole jar of peanut butter and they could switch places ONCE (team to finish last was disqualified)

round 2: they had to recreate this picture and had ten minutes to do so, at the end every team compared pictures and alfred decided whose was the worst and that team was out

round 3: they had to run five laps around the manor with their team member on their back, first person to get through the finish line (for the fifth time, there was a picture taken each time they crossed it) won.

simple, right?

WELL NO

first round basically went like this:

jason: NO FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID PEANUT BUTTER cass: jason: okay okay ill go first

tim went first, harper went first, and duke went first (duke didn't want to go first but he lost to rock paper scissors so)

tim puked in the first two minutes but alfred had forgotten to clarify that if you puke you're out so basically he kept eating

cass and jason were the first ones to switch

dick and tim switched immediately after (they were waiting for someone else to switch)

steph and harper fucking DIED

"im never eating peanut butter after this"

"by GOD EAT FASTER ITS NOT EVEN A SOLID"

"CAN YOU NOT SHOVE THAT SPOON DOWN MY THROAT"

"IM NOT GOING TO LOSE IN THE FIRST ROUND FUCK YOU"

duke and damian finished first and when ppl asked how (they're the youngest ones, people were sure they couldn't handle it) damian was like "i simply moved all my internal organs to the side" and duke was like "tf you literally ate two spoons and a half"

STEPH AND HARPER LOST and tim laughed (his team got to the next round by literally a second) so harper and steph both threw him the containers and spoons

second round:

tim thought he had a big brain for calling dibs on being on the pool mat but nOOO (duke was on the pool mat, damian was the lightest so yeah--- jason was on the pool mat solely because cass called dibs on jumping and crushing him-- imagine all the chaos)

literally they(jason/cass) took 14 pictures total and all of them were fucked up because of jason (his hands weren’t in the right place, both his legs were picked up)

duke and damian couldn’t do it skjdfhskfh they were D Y I N G (every two minutes you heard a really loud scream/groan with a sudden splat and yeah)

steph and harper had never laughed harder

cass was so done with jason she literally shoved him off the pool mat

tim was literally dead they had taken the shot around 20 times and none of them looked good it was horrible (dick didnt even apologize for crushing tim 90934757894 times -- not every shot was decent so they deleted around 40)

when the timer went off, alfred carefully took all the phones (jason’s phone was somehow at the bottom of the pool and jason was tired(tm) so he asked cass to get the phone pls and cass just got in the pool and shoved the pool mat over (and then got out)

after around 20 minutes of alfred going through the pictures, he decided that the best ones were dick and tim’s (how i have zero idea but)

and then the worst ones were duke and damian’s (so jason and cass made it to the third round)

cass asked alfred why theirs weren’t the best, and alfred said “well master jason’s arm looks very off and he looks genuinely scared” and cass was like “GODDAMNIT JASON” and lost her shit 

LAST ROUND: 

so they did think this through and basically cass on jason’s back and tim on dick’s back

jason: HA! YOU’RE NOT FASTER THAN I AM! dick: i don’t need to be??? you’ve got CASS on your back. you know what that means? jason: .... you wouldn’t.. tim, on dick’s back: *snorts* YEAH OKAY

cass: what are they talking about?  jason: NO NOTHING jason: you might want earbuds or something to like... block the sounds... they’re gonna be wanting to distract you cass: yeah well. I’m not distracted easily

the timer goes off, tim on dick’s back, and they’re pretty even for the first two laps, but then tim’s shoe falls off and tim’s like “WAIT MY SHOE” and dick goes “WHAT THE FUCK” 

and tim is like “whoa youre right KEEP RUNNING” 

cass on jason’s back: HEY STEPH CAN YOU PASS ME THE PRETZELS

update: cass does get pretzels and gives jason a few  jason: CASS THATS MY NOSE cass: OH OOPS LOL

dick: tim i think its time to pull out our secret weapon tim: yeah you’re right tim: tim: HEY CASS *starts humming to ‘levitating’ by dua lipa* tim: 🎶 if you wanna run away with me-  🎶

jason: NO  jason: NOOO CASS COVER YOUR EARS DONT LISTEN TO THEM cass:  🎶 IF YOU WANNA RUN AWAY WITH ME I KNOW A GALAXY WHERE I COULD TAKE YOU FOR A RIDE  🎶

(you may ask how this distracts jason but it just DOES)

dick takes this as a head start and runs faster (theyre on their third lap now- both)

tim gets a bit too excited and leans too much and makes them both fall over (they were abt half a lap ahead)

tim: GET UP GET UP dick: THIS IS YOUR FAULT TF YOU MEAN 

cass:  🎶 YOU WANT ME  🎶 jason:  🎶 I WANT YOU BABY  🎶  *runs past them*  dick: HOW jason: JUST DONT FIGHT IT 

karma’s a bitch (and dick paid steph) and jason slipped, causing them to fall almost the exact way that tim and dick fell

dick and tim have now caught up to them, as jason and cass pick themselves up

jason: we should switch cass: yeah alright do you want me to momentarily kill you so we can distract the others and then you wake up and we run jason: ...no cass:  jason: ... maybe

*two seconds later*

cass: HE’S DEAD! MY POOR BROTHER HE’S DEAD! steph: YEAH WE KNOW YOU MOMENTARILY KILLED HIM GET UP cass: ok jason lets go stand up 

they keep going and dick stops for a second (theyre ahead)  dick: hey its your turn now tim:  dick: yeah i know you cant cmon climb on

COMEPLETE HEADCANON jason and cass won anyways thank you for coming to my ted talk

[fiction-is-god]

Warning: spoilers for Jujutsu Kaisen 0

Alright, so I just watched jjk 0, and I have a couple of theories for what Gojo’s last words to Geto were. Which, by the way, WHY DIDN’T THEY SHOW USSSSS

well I suppose it leaves more room for theories

Keep in mind I am mostly completely just sprouting bs produced by my 1 am brain and awful memory

Also I heard somewhere that his words were hidden in the manga somewhere so I’m gonna be making some manga references.

Ok so I’m not going pay attention to the animated lip flaps too much because I don’t know Japanese and I don’t even know if that was animated correctly, but that does offer some guidelines. What Gojo said appears to be rather short, so that narrows it down.

Option 1: “I’ve missed you”

I mean, it makes sense? It’s short, and according to google, it’s relatively short in Japanese as well. I think this also matches Geto’s reaction, where he laughs and says something along the lines of “you could have at least thrown some curses at me”.

Later in the movie, Gojo (indirectly) talks about how Geto was his only best friend, and it is evident that Gojo still cares for him. It would make sense that Gojo missed Geto for all these years.

Option 2: “I had faith in you”

Drawing some manga parallels here, so there’s gonna be spoilers. When Gojo gets sealed, he states that he has faith in everyone, and everyone he pictured is someone he cares about. He obviously cares a lot about Geto, so he probably had faith in him too. Then, when Geto left, Gojo lost most of the faith he once had for Geto, hence the ‘had’.

Only problem is that Geto probably won’t laugh at that.

Option 3: “Goodnight, Suguru”

Credit goes to my discord friend Winter for this one! (Also manga spoilers btw)

When Gojo is about to get sealed, he says “maybe it’s goodnight for me, but it’s about time you wake up”. After that, Kenjaku loses control of Geto’s body for a while, so these words could have been what triggered it. This shows that these words hold at least some significance to Geto. Additionally, Kenjaku also said “goodnight, Satoru” right before, and he mentions to Mahito how he has Geto’s memories too, so maybe that subconsciously slipped out because of its importance.

It also seems like something Geto would laugh at.

Bonus option: for all you Geto and Gojo shippers out there, there’s also the classic “I will always love you”, also provided by Winter

Thank you all for coming to my TED Talk

[ayankun]

sorry, just finished the Japanese dub/sub of this ep (3x01) and I'm losing my mind

Context: When I rewatched S1 and 2 in Japanese as part of my hyperfixation last year, they did not have the Japanese subtitle option. Not sure if that has been added since then, but S3 does have both dub and sub options.

The subtitles are, generally speaking, more straight-forward translations of what's being said in English. The dub is way more localized and also attempts to capture the spirit of the speaker while nodding to the original performance while also trying to match the visual cadence of the line(s).

Not knowing anything about what I'm talking about, I imagine the subtitles could have been translated directly from a script, you know, text to text, because they're missing a lot of nuance that the dub goes out of its way to contain. HERE'S AN EXAMPLE.

In English, Ricky crashes EJ and Gina's convo about how nothing/no one is going to get in the way of their perfect summer, saying "Do you have room for one more?"

Of course, in English, this means is there still space for him at the camp, to which Ricky has arrived late. However, in context, his timing and his framing h e a v i l y imply that he's at least a red herring for an obstacle standing between EJ and Gina's relationship.

(also, in English, one might accidentally get OT3-baited by such a line and framing. Gina has TWO HANDS.)

Ok, so here's the Japanese subtitle:

"客宿に空きあります？" Which covers the literal sense of his question, "Any room for me at camp?"

But also, is Ricky one to speak so formally to EJ and Gina? I doubt it. Subtitles were generated without context, I think. (this isn't the only example of it)

Ok, can't get a screenshot for this so just believe me, in the dub he says "べっどは。。。ひとつ空いてる？"

(Note the supreme casualness of this line compared to the subtitle. Not only is it informal (drops the -ます form) but also uses the colloquial "てる" instead of "ている". There's also the loan word "べっど" replacing the serious-looking kanji compound "客宿".)

So, the two approaches to this sentence have the same meaning and general structure:

The notion of "at camp:"

客宿 - lit. "guest house" i.e. hotel/inn/lodging

べっど - lit. "bed"

The notion of "any room:"

空き - noun, space/room/vacancy

空く - verb, to be empty

So the subtitle is "does the camp have any room [left/for me]?" and the dub is "is there a bed free [for me]?"

In conclusion. The dub cares about translating Ricky asking EJ and Gina about "room for one more" in both its literal and figurative senses OT3 confirmed thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[the-better-rainbow-unikitty]

scrolling down on your blog I found the LOVE RUN ASK GAME and I must KNOWWWWW!!!

1.What song from Love Run did you first fall in love with?

11.What is your favorite performance by Madeleine?

12.What is your favorite performance by Joey?

14.What's your favorite ending of a song in the album?

I know I'm, like, kinda late to the game but you have to answer lol I wanna know

Ok wow, thanks for including the questions so I don't have to look them up!

1. What song from Love Run did you first fall in love with?

That was definitely Pray. It got me good 😁

11. What's your favourite performance by Madeleine?

"The cracks you made I filled with mortar, a broken pot can still hold water. Symphonies and sweat and sex mean nothing when you are obsessed with sin and soil and strength and song and all the words that came out wrong and him" in Pray. ❤️

AS WELL AS

"I don't know how to reach you when you get like this, I've been waiting for you to come home" in Little Miss Why So. Breaks my heart ❤️ (also the "yeah, but why?"s)

BUT I also love "Tear me up and burn me up and rip me up and leave your hand on the wall as you go" and "I cannot find the words to keep you" in New York Torch Song.

And "don't be yellow-bellied" and "Where is go, ma? Where's the vodka?" in Not Yet/Love Run.

Aaaah it's impossible to choose just one, she sings everything so wonderfully!!! (I also constantly have to remind myself that this is about performance, NOT line, otherwise the answer would stretch on and on and on)

12. What's your favourite performance by Joey?

Oh boy. Oh no....

"Because love does not exist here, in this garden there's no feeling, and you say the words so often that I barely know the meaning" in Elsa's song. Something in the way he sings the word barely makes me lose my mind. So that's it - my favourite performance by Joey is that one word.

Then there is also his performance in Two Minutes. The whole song.

And of course there is "That youuu, youuu can't sleep" in Not Yet/Love Run.

14. What's your favourite ending of a song in the album?

Not Yet/Love Run has the most amazing ending!!

So that's it, thanks for coming to my ted talk and feel free to ask again nex time I guess lol

[bonvoyagenoona]

The most g-rated questions ever (not): 1. Cums inside you? 2. Cums ON you? 3. Wants you to swallow? 4. Swallows for you? ....Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

Roomie!! I had fun with this one!! Your brain always sends me to crazy places!

OK peeps. Buckle up. This one’s kind of a (ahem) long one…

Q: Cums inside you? A: Hobi, Namjoon

Hobi loves it when he can disappear into you. He loves sliding his fingers into your mouth, and even more, gliding past your other set of lips. He loves watching his dick get surrounded by your flesh. And he loves feeling spurt after spurt shoot into you as he pumps. He loves sending his grunts into your mouth when he bends over to kiss you. And he loves the way his whisper echoes down your throat when he tells you, “There. That should keep you full for quite a while.”

Namjoon loses his mind whenever he’s with you. How can he think about an exit strategy, or any strategy for that matter, at a time like this? He’ll bend you forward and grip your torso with his beefy biceps to make sure you’re still enough to collect every single drop of the juice that you’re squeezing out of him. You’ll clench shut, letting nothing drip or fall, until Namjoon drags his cock up your ass cheek, like signing his name. “You were thirsty, huh?” he’ll ask.

Q: Cums ON you? A: Jin, Jimin, Tae, Yoongi

Jin isn’t typically seen as desperate, but that’s exactly the look in his eyes when you slide your wet hands up and down his shaft. He lets out moan after moan as you pulse your grip. By the way he’s pushing his back against the headboard and fisting his sheets, you can tell he’s close. He just needs a little nudge. Your dancing tongue on his slit is just the right invitation to let go. When he comes all over your fingers, he’ll sigh, smile, and say, “OK. Now let me show you what my hands can do.”

Jimin loves the feeling of running his cockhead over your lips, biting his plush lips so hard that your eyes widen in fear that he’ll tear them open. When you do, he’ll loll his head back and groan as he releases, your lips shiny like gloss. His heavenly sighs float out of him when you run your mouth around him, licking his raw muscle and gently pulling him down from his cloud. But he won’t let you suck him dry. He’ll pull you close to him and kiss you, licking your mouth and chin. “Be nice and share,” he’ll grin.

Tae is a painter, after all. He’ll lay on top of you, breathless, drawing little shapes on you, eyes getting wider and, well, spunkier, as he notices himself less dripping and more sticking. He likes running his fingers over your belly and pulling his hand away to show you what he’s made. “You like it?” he’ll ask coyly, before rubbing himself into your skin, trying to get himself into your very pores. Things are so much better when you let him under your skin.

Yoongi needs to see it. Sure, he likes the feeling of emptying himself into you, pouring everything you make him feel back into your chalice. But there’s something special about seeing those ivory white splatters against your smooth ass and back. It mesmerizes him. The way it catches the light. How it glistens. How natural it looks on your form. How beautiful, this art you create together. “Pretty,” he’ll croak, as he falls next to you and rubs your back, “so pretty.”

Extra Q: Both? A: Jungkook

Jungkook wants to experience everything. When you’re grinding slow and sweet, he’ll want to fill you up for that extra satisfaction, whispering sentences that could be ballad lyrics into your ear. But when it’s a quick fuck before work, or a playful fuck before bed, he’ll stretch those eyes open and ask excitedly, “Where this time, noona?” He loves seeing all the different angles and patterns that splash across you, like nectar on your face, almost as cloying as the proud, flowery kisses he presses against your lips.

Q: Wants you to swallow? A: Namjoon, Jin, Tae, Hobi

No bones about it. Namjoon loves it when you swallow. But he needs to be invited in. “Will you?” he’ll ask hesitantly. You swallow your own drool, warming yourself up, showing him. And you present your tongue like a welcome mat. As soon as you wrap your lips around him, he’ll start to pump and lose control, and as you gain it, you smile. He’ll open his eyes, disoriented until he finds you. “Let me see first,” he’ll ask, smiling with satisfaction at the tiny rivulet of cum that you let escape before you swallow him down, like one of his protein shakes, strong and filling.

Jin, on the other hand, will tell you exactly when to swallow. He wants you to eat him up like you would one of his dishes. He wants you to give you that sensation that he loves, the feeling of a satisfying bite of food in his gullet. His eyes are hypervigilant as he watches the mass travel down your chamber, and he’ll start mimicking your swallows, the taut muscle seemingly working smoothly. He watches for even the slightest grimace, but it never appears. “Open?” he’ll ask. When you do, and happily display your empty mouth, he’ll sigh proudly. Jin the Chef, always preparing a great meal.

Tae loves it when it’s just between you two. Quiet moans. Whimpers and whispers. Fingers over your mouth to keep you from making a sound. Or his dick in your mouth, like now, to keep you silent. He loves a secret. When he comes, he’ll expect you to leave no trace. “All of it,” he’ll tell you firmly, though his eyes are soft as he watches you oblige. He’ll sigh as you finish and rise to him for a heated kiss. He’ll run his hand down his length for the final assessment. If he feels so much as a bead, he’ll send you back. “I said all of it, noona.”

Hobi loves cleaning. It’s an act of care to him. So he really loves the way you eagerly lap him up, leaving no morsel unaccounted for. He’ll moan and run his fingers through your hair, telling you how good it feels. How warm. How kind. You’ll gaze up at him in this rare moment, having just seen a supernova explode into a spiraling, black hole. But bit by bit, you lick him back to life, and he shines brighter than ever when you show him that you ate up every last bit.

Q: Swallows for you? A: Jimin, Yoongi

The only person Jimin loves more than himself is you. So, to get to experience himself through you is a real gift. He’d say that he’d suck you dry, but the way he cleans you out while also massaging your clit with his soft fingers ensures that you won’t be dry anytime soon. You’ll ask him why he loves doing it so much. He’ll say something wistful about vanilla ice cream on a summer’s day. For respite, you’ll get a scoop each. And as you watch him lick his treat, that bright tongue digging into the delicate sugar cone, you’ll ache a little, his knowing smirk letting you know that, yes, that’s exactly what he looked like when he was enjoying you. 

Yoongi is meticulous. He’s afraid of losing everything he’s created. And he’s always nervous about overstaying his welcome. That’s why you think he slurps himself out of you so carefully, and kind of quickly, though he always makes it a point to send you flying with another incredible orgasm as he does it. You ask him about it, and he tells you with a smirk that that’s not why he does it at all. It’s because he loves the way you taste together, the perfect balance of milk and honey. (And it’s because he wants to hurry and start over again.)

Extra Q: Both? A: Jungkook

Again, Jungkook wants to experience everything. At first, he’ll want you to swallow every last dollop as he’s standing above you, body still rolling with each remaining shiver, eyes carefully watching as the folds in your throat take parts of him deeper and deeper inside. The ripple down your neck will make him curious. What does it taste like? You seem to like it so much? So the next time, he’ll make sure you lie down, and as soon as he comes, he’ll fall to his knees and slurp himself out of you. He doesn’t think much of himself. But with your taste mixing in on his tongue, he’ll tell you that he’s definitely getting the sweeter end of the deal.

[blueskittlesart]

i am in a sad. how about some hc characteristics for link and zelda

this is so long because i have so many feelings and half of this is more analysis of their canon characters than headcanons but its IMPORTANT so i cant omit any of it but i dont want to make a super long post analyzing video game characters so it’s under the readmore hgfdfghj

SO link was always a very quiet kid even before the sword and everything. He wouldn’t speak unless spoken to and was shy enough that he had trouble socializing with the other kids in his village. However i dont think it really would have bothered him that much?? he found his own ways to have fun, climbing trees or shield surfing down the hills around hateno. Even as a kid, he was very independent and had a tendency to want to resolve problems on his own without going to anyone else for help, so he’d come home with two skinned knees insisting that he was fine and he didn’t need his mother’s help bandaging them up. (yes this drove his mother crazy, yes mipha also had to deal with this shit and that’s what made that cutscene between them so intimate, it was her telling him that he’s allowed to trust her enough to let her help and that she will always be there to heal him as many times as it takes. dont talk to me) Through his memories we see that zelda thinks, or thought, that he unquestioningly accepted his duty as the hylian champion and never had any struggles with his place in the world, but zelda tends to take things at face value and i find it hard to believe that link never had any regrets about his position. He was put into training as young as twelve years old, essentially taken away from his family and his life in order to serve a higher destiny. I think it probably lead to link placing all his value on how he can serve others. As far as he’s concerned, his only worth is contingent on his ability to protect and serve zelda and the other champions, which is why we see so much of him getting hurt or being reckless in order to protect others; he believes on some level that if he fails to be a good soldier he will not matter to anyone anymore. his only worth in his mind is based on how he can be “useful.” On a less depressing note tho i think hes very good with animals, espc horses! he finds them easier to interact with than people. dogs are the same, theres a reason it only takes like a minute of him standing in front of a dog for it to follow him wherever he goes. He also likes to cook and that’s not even a hc have you seen the little graphics for all the different food he can make? the PRESENTATION. he’s very deliberate in little things like that because it MATTERS to him that what he makes looks good! not for any particular reason, not to impress anyone but because he’s made it for himself and he wants to take pride in what he’s made. thanks for coming to my ted talk 

Ok now on to zelda. She has a lot more canon personality than link which like. she’s an npc and link is the player character so that’s to be expected BUT i still have a lot to say about her character. She’s headstrong and stubborn and emotional and it gets her into trouble. She has a tendency to take things at face value and she lets her emotions take over very quickly, which puts a strain on her relationships with others. Due to her status and the prophecy she was supposed to fulfill she was incredibly isolated as a child. she hardly ever interacted with anyone her own age, which is why she treats link the way she does at first; she doesn’t have any experience with anyone who isn’t required to be around her. She’s used to being condescended to while simultaneously being expected to be perfect in everything she does, and it’s made her... mean. she deliberately pushes people (read: link) away because she believes that no one really cares about her outside of her status and her supposed power, and what we see of her father’s actions only reinforce that perspective. she and link are very VERY similar in that regard, in that they place all their self-worth on their importance as hyrule’s prophecized saviors. the difference between them is that zelda fails, she is unable to be the perfect princess she is expected to be, and she has a support system in urbosa (and link, and as far as im concerned mipha too even tho they aren’t shown to be friends in canon) that allows her to recover from the trauma that forced her into that mindset. she learns to be more empathetic, she stops pushing people away and begins to consider how her actions affect others. she doesn’t necessarily lose the idea that she has to be useful completely, but she becomes aware of it and makes an effort to not take out her frustrations with herself on other people. Ok thats most of my Thoughts out of the way so onto the less depressing stuff, Zelda is INCREDIBLY smart. like child prodigy level intelligence. Her mind is very mathematically oriented, which is partially why she’s so drawn to sheikah tech. it’s something she understands very easily and can break down to its most bare functions in a matter of minutes. she was instrumental in getting literal ANCIENT TECH to work again and was respected by sheikah scholars. She is also very very curious, which helps her out in certain situations, but can be... problematic in others. she doesn’t know when to leave well enough alone. shes essentially always turned up to 11. She’s interested in animals, like link, but her interest is from a much more scientific standpoint than his. She has trouble with animals that require a more empathetic approach, like horses, because she prefers to think of animals and plants in terms of their benefit to her: a horse is transportation, a frog could be used in an elixir or a dish, etc etc. her curiosity and willingness to learn help her out a lot post-calamity when she finds herself traveling hyrule with link. though not very adept with weapons, at least at first, her quick thinking makes her a good strategist. she’s adept at finding weaknesses in enemies that may be less obvious to a common soldier (cough cough she literally highlights ganon’s weaknesses in the final battle of botw and i want them to keep that motif in botw2 because it makes so much sense for her nintendo PLEASE)

HELP THIS IS SO LONG AND IT CAN BARELY EVEN BE CONSIDERED HEADCANONS IM SO SORRY I JUST. HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS ABT BOTW LINK AND ZELDA DONT TALK TO ME

[jenmyeons]

Favorite Fics 2019

hi hello it’s me your local mess. ok so this hit me on my way to work the other day and since it’s friday i feel like today is a good day to hopefully make someone’s day/night/weekend a little brighter? 

i love reading fanfics. periodt. there are lots of incredible writers out there on this site and other platforms who take time to write beautiful fics about the real people and characters and their emotional support kpop ladies and gentlemen to show their love and appreciation so i want to dedicate this to my favorite fics of this year. these fanfics are of varying lengths and genres but they all have two things in common 1) they were posted this year 2) i love them.

(most of these are exo but i have some other groups sprinkled in there too)

other favorite fics of mine can be found under my fic recs tag!

A Decade of Midnights by @chogi-wae 

queen of noir! grumpy chenneth! sexy detectives! murder mystery! do i even have to say anything else? oh yes! we also get coroner!baekhyun 

ps: jae has a sequel started for this with two parts already having me at the edge of my seat. i love all of jae’s writing but this one takes the cake

Enough by @yeoldontknow

anything kat touches turns golden and holy mother of everything that is self-love and reflection. this is a fic for all us sexy ladies with a body that doesn’t conform to what society has decided is “beautiful”. i can’t call myself plus size in any way but i do not have a flat tummy or legs for days or perky titties. quite the opposite; i’m a short lady with love handles, saggy tits and stomach rolls (yes we’re going tmi here but it’s important ok). park chanyeol is the opposite of that and he’s the best fucking man ever in this fic. he’s a muscle man but he’s a man with the biggest heart and he says “you have a cute butt” which is enough reason for you to read this. when i feel bad about myself, i think about enough and i become a little happier

Empty Vessels 

another yeoldontknow masterpiece! i stand by the statement that this is the best fic i have ever read. probably read this five times already and i think about it almost daily. junmyeon is a witch from salem and that’s only one of the many reasons for you to check this out and hopefully fall in love with it as much as i have. it’ll rip your heart out and stomp on it. dub me professional empty vessels promoter already kat!! 

Dichotomy by @kyungseokie

dia hurts you in the best possible way with this fic. bawl my eyes out every damn time i read this because fucking hell this is emotional investment and hearts broken and everything hurts and this is not your average love triangle where one guy is obviously worse than the other. NO! this can go either way and you just want everyone to be happy and baekhyun needs a hug!

Teacher’s Pet by @suhoerections

teacher junmyeon getting called daddy “threatening” to bend you over his desk and fuck you hard is a lot for a suhoe stan such as myself to think about but i’m not mad, just jorny.

Clouded by @mayrubyy

uhm yes do you want to cry some more? this is an emotional rollercoaster, you have been warned! this fic has great potential and it’s maya’s child and when the next part is posted you know shit will go down and ashjgff i have no words only love for both the author aka my baby and the fic itself🥺💖

Familiar Stranger by @myforeverforlife

love love love love LOVE familiar stranger! a beautiful story about reader losing all memories of the last five years due to an accident which includes her entire life with fiancé kim jongdae. dae is an angel, we all know that, but he’s somehow even more angelic as the most patient person ever in familiar stranger. this hits right in the feels (can you tell i love to read angst ahjdsf) and it’s not your usual wham bam thank you ma’am all-memories-recovered-in-five-seconds kind of situation either and i’m praying for another update of this because this is not just one of the best fics of this year but one of my favorites period.

Sunny Side Up by @dreaminghaos

i love everything fee writes with a burning passion y’all

this fic is everything everything everything!!! i can’t get enough of this fic and i probably never will get enough of it either because i love this pairing and i’m in love with struggling writer!jeonghan 

Magnetic by @softyexo 

did anyone say ceo!myeon? this is a recent love of mine. i read it just the other day and have been thinking about it non-stop since. absolutely in love with oc’s and junmyeon’s dynamic in this one and it feeds all my lovesickness for this man made of pure husband material. thanks for coming to this ted talk.

Hold on to silence by @dropsofletters

amazing! show stopping! incredibly unique! absolutely astonishing! idiots in love! omg i LOVE this one! yixing as chanhun’s manager is everything i didn’t know i needed and holy crap this is such a lovely story please read it and experience the feels™

Neon Moon by @kyungseokie

they were roleplaying! ROLEPLAYING!

Trauma by @baekwell--tart

dad and secret mafia man!byun falls in love with his babysitter after being an absolute asshole to her and oh my god i am so invested in this masterpiece. whenever bella updates trauma i yell. i’ve re-read this many times already and i continue to find new reasons why i love this story with my whole entire being

Mr. Byun

bella once again proving that she writes the most amazing bbh fics. angst and smut combined i swear i was a whole lot worked up with all the spice in this one and then i cried like a baby when it ended. have i told you that i’m a very emotionally stable person?🤡

Bedazzling Heart of Gold by @baekonsforbreakfast

i love this song! baekhyun gets dumped and falls in love with oc who runs one of the biggest hostess bars in all of sk and holy crap you just love everyone in this fic. even that one character who you feel like you should hate but kind of still empathize with on a deeply emotional level. no? just me? ok then. i love you belle and i hope you know how much i enjoy your writing💗

Mr. Muscles by @chogi-wae

short and sweet drabble about oc biting jun’s bicep. no but for real i’ve read this one countless times and i just love a domestic jun so go ahead and read duality and dyson as well because nobody writes cute domestic fluff like jae ilysm

Money Makes Her Smile by @ninibears-erigom

mrs gom has written one of the dirtiest but also loveliest smut series of 2019. jongdae’s part was posted yesterday and holy fuck i have never read better jongdae smut ever i think

Business Before Pleasure by @pcychedelic

actor minseok! i repeat: actor minseok!

they get down and dirty in like the second chapter and i’m in love. not because of the obvious spiciness but because the amazing portrayal of minseok in this fic. love a strong female character? then you will love oc too!

High Voltage by @skyesins

SIN! THIS IS SIN! I LOVED EVERY SINGLE PART OF THIS FIC AND PART TWO IS EVEN BETTER!

there’s also the original ofc version on asian fanfics for those who aren’t into reader inserts and it’s just as good! 

Literally every single aesthetic that @kpop-daze has written but some favorites include exo as broken love / exo as ephemeral tenderness /  exo as fleeting heartbreak 

Unfitting by @heechulhamster

SOLDIER MINSEOK SOLDIER MINSEOK SOLDIER MINSEOK that is all

no wait... this has real descendants of the sun vibes and i love it so much can i have a soldier!xiu por favor

Fire and Frost by @writing-exo-things

queen of drabbles! i love every single one of them but this one is next level™ i cried like a baby this is truly amazing!!!

Take Care by @omyeol 

 g o d i felt this fic on a deeply spiritual and emotional level 

False Hope by @pastel-kpop

i hate you and i love you for writing this it still hurts reading this like YES MAKE ME HURT AYESHA THEY ARE IDIOTS 

Mocha by @stainandscribble  

the whole café series is lovely but mocha and espresso really stuck out to me i’m so soft for the whole aesthetic of these! 

ever imagined that jackson wang is your date to your brother’s wedding? well @softseunies did and it turned out fucking amazing! what i love the most is that it’s very open for interpretation and of course jackson is always a mood when will he be my date and mayhaps potential bf at the wedding of the brother i don’t have?

little forest by @myforeverforlife

I LOVE THIS! DO YOU HEAR ME?! L O V E THIS!

not his to love by @boogerines

can you hear me sobbing? this hurts so much let me go back to crying over this again after i re-read this for the nth time

this blurb right here is adorable @sprinklesofktrash did that!

wild valley by @fairyyeols

wild valley is that bitch™ and that’s all i have to say i live and breathe for this installation of exo customs my favorite, in fact

blossoms in the wind by @marshmallow-phd

don’t @ me but this goblin!au with junmyeon as the goblin and baekhyun as the grim reaper is more intriguing than the drama and that’s saying a lot but i cry with every new chapter ohmygoddddd

wrong number by @yeoldotcom

i’m a hoe for fake texts and zee makes the best ones🥺🥺🥺🥺

also love love love bf!jun in food buddies

break up with me by @exoangst

don’t mind me i’m just crying in a corner as i read this for the millionth time and cry over how well written oc is and how fucking amazing that breakup scene is like has anyone done it like that before? maybe, idk but this is the only one that counts 

[jean-despacito69]

I have nothing to lose, life has no meaning. So there it is, reasons why you should consider Descole/Desmond x Dimitri

1. Personality wise, they match.

Ok so, you may remember Dimitri as serious and somber, but man he kinda IS dramatic. Remember that scene where he speaks to Layton in the Pagoda? I mean- do i have to remind you about "An impressive deduction, does anything ever get pass you Hershel?" ? With THAT voice? The delivery of that line...MAN it gives me the chills. We don't have to discuss about Descole/Desmond's personality since we all know he's a drama queen but can be calm and collected. Dimitri and Des would play off each other nicely and have stuff to talk about, but we're gonna discuss about that stuff in our next point.

2. They have similar interests.

So, remember what Descole said in Eternal Diva? Yes, he's not only mr drama queen, but apparently also mr humble scientist. Who else is a scientist? Dimitri. Oh yeah. Ok seriously, they both like science and building machines. They have something in common to talk about. We could talk about disguises but it was something they both did for their schemes, we don't know if it's part of their hobbies.(In any case, Descole would definitely make fun of Dimitri's disguises)

3. It's deslay, but there's no incest.

You heard me folks. What makes deslay truly deslay? The main things that come in my mind are "enemies to lovers" and "Claire complex", which I'll explain how they can both work in this non- incestuous couple I'm ranting about : how to make them enemies to lovers? Aus are there for a reason (I'll explain the au idea I have in another post if needed). But what is the "Claire complex"? Well, it's a quicker way to say "trying to move on from Claire's death". Herself suffered a lot from losing his loved one like that, and in some deslay fanfics Des would help him move on with a fresh start with someone else. Who else suffered a lot from that same loss? Dimitri (and Don Paolo too but this ain't about him). Hershel and Dimitri may not have the same experience with Claire, but to the core her loss was a lot for them. Plus, the differences with their relationships with her are good! New ideas! More concepts!.

4. Their pairing name sounds nice.

Desmitri. It's nice.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk I hope y'all changed your mind and considered this pairing now I'm going back looking at descole's ass bye