#oh~ I love you Joong

[joongdunking]

Jealous Joong?? 😆

[gunsatthaphan]

4 boys, 1 braincell 😌🧎🏼‍♀️

[xiaohuayaos]

guy who is t-minus 9 episodes away from confessing his love to the dirty haired Candy girl ^^

[nnnn99999]

Dunk singing My Starlight in the school tour makes me miss simm so much. Not that I wasn't missing simm before. But now I am missing it so much more. Oh how I miss my comfort show. I amount of love I have for KluenDao is not normal. They really are my comfort couple. Sometimes you just need that sugary sweetness in your life. Should I just do a quick simm rewatch? I will finally have some time. But I have other shows I wanted to get to. But a simm rewatch would heal me. To simm or not to simm is the real question.

[yundeob]

the parent trap | KHJ

part 1 of the Night in Hollywood!series

☆ trope: exes to lovers!au, divorced!au

☆ pairing: producer!hongjoong x designer!reader, dad!joong x mom!reader

☆ warnings: nsfw (mdni), swearing, mentions of food, mentions of food poisoning, female desc. reader, drinking, suggestiveness, smut, slight!breeding kink, oral sex (f. receiving), overstim, unprotected sex (wrap before you tap!) nipple play, titty sucking, marking, praise, slightdom!joong, blond!joong bc that itself is too much for me, mentions of (early) pregnancy, you’re both in your early thirties and make an unbelievably stubborn couple in this!

☆ synopsis: AS DIVORCED PARENTS to two twin daughters, you and hongjoong have your fair share of work cut out. Driving to piano lessons, cheering at hockey games, drop offs at each other’s houses, it can all be a little much. But could a relaxing summer retreat as a whole family possibly rekindle past emotions you’ve swept under the rug? . . .

☆ word count: 18.1k

☆ playlist: soulful strut by young-holt unlimited, l-o-v-e by nat king cole, just the way you are by billy joel, slipping through my fingers by abba, this will be (an everlasting love) by natalie cole

☆ a/n: it’s finally here. I can’t believe I’m writing this and saying it’s finally here oh my goodness. first off, thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone who has supported me with the series so far (shoutout to @kitten4sannie , @byuntrash101 and especially @desirehorizon for being amazing!) everyone’s sweet comments have been greatly appreciated, and I just hope this silly little fic brings a smile to your everyday lives.

ty for making writing worth it as a writer. now cue the opening credits!

“ABSOLUTELY NOT” Hongjoong says.

“But dadd,” she whines, clutching the wrinkled pamphlet closer to her chest. Eunseo’s small hands are covered in purple doodles her sister drew using a glitter pen. 

“Why not?” the girl complains, shrugging her shoulders. 

He sighs, pushing his glasses up with one hand as he continues typing away at the important document the producing company sent him on his laptop. He tries his best to reason with the child.

“Because, baby…” pausing to think for a moment before responding. “It would be hard for your mom and I to find a time that fits into our schedules. I’ve got work, and she must be busy as well.” 

Eunseo glares at her father’s excuse. 

Okay, yeah, the man knows it’s somewhat of a lie, himself. 

She continues to protest by shoving the advertising pamphlet in her dads face and blocking his view of the screen. Thankfully, Hongjoong is used to these sort of work distractions, expertly avoiding her by craning his neck sideways and continuing to type away.

“But dad, it’s an amazing cottage resort! They’ve got a lake where you can go swimming in, a forest hiking trail, a bonfire to roast marshmallows and even a diner less than fifteen minutes away! So if you end up burning the camp food like last time, we can just order and eat in! Isn’t that great?” She beams. 

He stops typing for a second, fingers hovering over the keyboard as he gives his first born a look that makes her immediately break into a sweet smile, batting her lashes and flashing him a look of innocence. 

“Please?” She begs, standing on the edge of her feet as she gazes up at him. “The last time we went was when Eunbyul and me were toddlers.” 

And how on earth could any dad’s heart not melt at the sight of his daughter trying to convince him about one harmless vacation? 

Hongjoong wheels his office chair back, turning so he could look her in the eyes properly and tuck a stray hair behind her ear. 

“Listen honey, I’m sorry, I really wish I could, but…” he trails off, looking back at the open tabs and file documents displayed on his computer.

Turning his head around and upon seeing a frown form on his daughter's face, he quickly reassures her. 

“Once you finish your final piano recital tomorrow and your mom picks your sister up to take her to her hockey game, how about we go fishing the weekend afterwards?” he suggests, brows raising. “That’ll mean I have just the two of you all to myself.”

Eunseo mumbles under her breath, quiet but insistent enough that he catches it. 

“But we’re supposed to be a family of four.” 

She sulks, thinking of how that would leave you, her mother, left out of their plans. The arms holding the pamphlet up, ultimately fall down in defeat. 

He places a peck on her forehead, patting her on the back. “You know, if you can get your mom to say yes, then I’ll think about it” he chuckles, knowing the highly unlikely probability of the event.

Adjusting his glasses, the producer goes back to his work, peeking his daughter slugging away from the corner of his eye. 

Eunseo slumps her shoulders in defeat as she walks out of her dads office, turning the corner to see her twin sister, Eunbyeol, pressing her ears near the door with her neck outstretched. Clearly she’s been caught in the middle of trying to overhear their conversation. 

The twin younger by fifteen seconds quickly rushes over, waiting expectantly.

“So? What did dad say?”

Eunseo exhales, throwing the information pamphlet away on the wooden floors and slumping against the living room couch. 

“He’s totally not buggin. Said he wants to take us fishing next weekend instead. Just us three.” she grumbles. 

Eunbyeol scrunches her nose at the idea. 

“But dad sucks at fishing.”

Her sister groans, kicking her small feet against the couch in frustration. “I know!” Eunbyeol starts to worry, coming to sit beside her.

“Then how on earth are we going to get mom and dad to get back with each other again? They haven’t been in the same room since we were like, five!”

Her twin sister scoffs, “First, we gotta get them to have a proper conversation with each other. They barely even talk when they drop us off at each other's houses.”

Nobody truly knows why you and Hongjoong had divorced so suddenly when the girls were young. Not even themselves.

All they were used to were cold stares and one word replies shared amongst their parents, refusing to find harmony in their co-parenting.

Frankly, your girls have had enough of the performance you were both trying to maintain, looking past your expressions to realize you and your husband still held feelings for the other. It was only a matter of time and place in order to set you two up together, thus, the idea of an intimate, family getaway came into their minds. 

After a few moments of letting her words hang in the air, Eunbyeol’s eyes widened to the size of saucers. 

“That’s it!”

The older twin looks up quizzically, watching her sister jump off the couch and gaze at her excitedly. 

“We’ll just have to force them to meet each other! We can always guilt trip them for dropping us off at their houses and making us play alone!”

Eunseo rolls her eyes at the idea. “Right, and how are we going to do that dummy? The only reason they’d do that, was if it was an emergency.”

Whoever said twin telepathy wasn’t a thing was a liar, because the second Eunseo catches onto what her sister is saying, the twins share a look of pure mischievousness, the gears in their brains working together as one. 

With hushed whispers and quiet giggles, the twins immediately begin conducting their plan in secrecy near the corner of the living room, backs turned and in the middle of discussion when Hongjoong walks out of his office with an empty coffee mug. 

“What are you guys doing over there?”

“Leave us alone! Family man traitor!” Eunbyeol shouts, holding a slightly hostile grudge to her father before turning back to whisper to her twin. 

Hongjoong shakes his head, sighing as he heads into the kitchen. 

“Then it’s perfect! I’ll stay here with dad once my piano recital is over, and then when Mom picks you up for your hockey game tomorrow, we’ll try convincing them together!”

Eunbyeol nods her head in agreement, eyes lighting up with excitement as she whispers in a hushed tone. 

“And once both events end, we’ll pretend to be so sick that they have to take us to the nearby hospital.”

The other twin smirks. ”Where we’ll end up guilt tripping them into taking us to the cottage.”

They double high five in victory at their flawless plan, already waiting for tomorrow to come as soon as possible.

“A summer cottage?” you repeated, brows raising at the idea as you made a left turn onto your street. 

Eunbyeol nods eagerly from the back seat after getting picked up, having ranted on and on about the ad in the pamphlet since the moment you saw her.

“It's an amazing establishment mom,” She boasts, making you laugh at her words while parking the car and unbuckling your seatbelt.

“They have everything you could possibly think of!”

“Oh, really?” You say skeptically, opening the door for her. 

Eunbyeol is lost in the middle of passionately describing all the relaxing activities you could do by yourself, or rather per se, with a special partner together. 

“There’s couples hiking retreats, couples canoeing, couples yoga… did I mention couples hiking retreats?” She confuses, retracing her words. 

You roll your eyes and smile, keys jangling as you walk through the entrance of your apartment flat while balancing the bags and items in your hands.

Being a wedding dress designer and yet picking up your daughter from your ex-husband's house could’ve been ironic to some people. But after having split with Hongjoong since the girls were so young, you came to grow fond of having some independence as a divorcee, channeling your main focus into setting up your own bridal shop downtown.

It was through that hard work and focus that you did it all by yourself with no additional help.

You’d be lying if you said you haven't opened a bottle of red wine some nights due to loneliness as a divorced single mother, but at least that was what you had your daughters for.

You made sure to work just as hard as you did enjoy playing and spending time with them. After all, they were the light of your life and purpose for living.

Balancing the pizza you picked up on the way home, you set it down on the kitchen island, telling Eunbyeol to go wash her hands in the sink. The girl doesn’t stop ranting.

“There’s usually only two rooms in the cottage, so you’ll have to sleep together with dad, but I guess you won't mind, would you? After all, you were once married” She rolls her eyes, reaching for the soap.

You shake your head with a sigh. ”What is up with you and getting me and your father together in the same room?” you muttered as you took out the plates and utensils. 

Eunbyeol eventually walks back to you, wiping her hands on her baggy jeans before sitting on the kitchen stool. 

“It’s not that I’m obsessed, Mom. Actually, Eunseo and I are just dying to get away this summer now that school is over.”

Turning around from plating the pizza and salad, you chastise your daughter, telling her to sit with her bum flat on the stool so she doesn’t fall. She immediately listens, carrying on with her persuasion. 

“We just want you and dad to get the chance to relax as well, that’s all!” her mouth full from a bite of hot, greasy pizza. 

You smile, wiping your washed hands on the kitchen towel and coming over to wrap your arms around her affectionately. 

“Spending time with you and Eunseo every week is how I relax,” you assured her, smothering your baby with kisses on her cheek.

Byeol lets out a squeal of annoyance, taking another bite of her pizza. “You’re squishing me!” She tries hiding her smile, failing when you lean in closer. 

You pull back in laughter, ruffling her hair as you walk away while reminding her.

“Oh! Don’t forget you’ve got your hockey game tonight!”

Byeol chews faster, munching on the soft crust and counting down the hours on the kitchen clock. 

She smiles to herself. 

“Don’t worry, I know!”

“What do you mean you need to go to the hospital?” Hongjoong asks in a worried voice, standing against the women’s washroom stall. He holds Eunseo’s congratulatory flower bouquet for first place in hand, feeling the stares of multiple women passing by, clearly judging him for being in the ladies room with them. 

“Honey, is everything all right?” He asks worriedly. A string of groans come from behind the door.

“You need to leave!” one old lady thrusts her walking cane at the father, lips pursed in dissatisfaction. 

Eunseo did such a phenomenal job tonight for her piano recital, that Hongjoong was shocked to see his daughter clutch her stomach first thing after running down the steps of the stage, dashing to the washrooms.

He whips his head back. “My daughter’s having a bit of a situation in here, okay miss? Have a bit of understanding!” He barks frustratedly out loud to the onlookers before speaking softly back to the stall door. 

“Eunseo, baby, talk to me, is everything alright in there? Are you sure you need to go to the hospital? Is it that bad?” 

The girl continues her acting performance, letting out fake groans while typing furiously on her cellphone. 

“Oh the pain! I think I might have food poisoning, dad!”

Seolie: How far along are u

Byeolie: Mom’s outside, banging to come in. 

Seolie: same, I told dad I needed to go to the hospital.

Eunseo lets out another groan of pain, causing Hongjoong to worry even more. 

“That’s it, Eunseo. Let me in and help you” he decides, searching his bag for a painkiller or at least some sort of medication for relief. 

The girl frantically checks her phone, eyes lighting up at the new message. 

Byeolie: Mom’s getting the car to take me to the hospital. I’ve got her convinced to call dad soon.

Eunseo types as fast as her small fingers can move, even faster than when she performed her piano solo from before. 

Seolie: Then what do I do????

Hongjoong gets slightly suspicious at the lack of sound coming from the stall, calling to his daughter again.

“Eunseo? Everything alright?”

At the next notification, the girl makes up her mind, getting the signal from her sister. 

Byeolie: play dead. Mom calling soon. See ya there.

The actress gets into character, gaining her composure before unlocking the washroom stall and holding her stomach as she stumbles into her dad’s surprised arms. 

“Eunseo!”

She wails, falling limp. “Oh, dad! Please! Take me to the hospital, it hurts too much!”

It’s truly a mystery which parent she got her acting skills from.

But she doesn’t have to tell him twice at that point. The man is already piggy backing his fainted daughter and sprinting out of the ladies washroom, reassuring her with soothing comments as he makes a beeline for the parking lot.

“Stay with me baby!” He huffs, unbeknownst to Eunseo who peeks one eye open. 

Only after he straps his daughter in the backseat and is turning on the engine does he receive a sudden phone call from you, pressing the speaker for the whole car to hear your panicked voice. You break the news to him first. 

“Eunbyeol’s severely sick. She fainted right after her hockey game.”

Hongjoong’s eyes widened. “What?”

You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “She was holding her stomach saying she ate something wrong. Is Eunseo okay?” 

Hongjoong puts the stick into drive, backing out of the parking lot and replying in a hurry.

“She’s hit with the same thing right now. I’ll meet you at the Hospital in ten” he grunts, sweat forming on his brow as he speeds through traffic, not caring if he gets a ticket. 

Had he looked in his rear view mirror, he would have seen Eunseo sagging near the car door, clutching her stomach with a small grin on her face.

You never liked the hospital. 

The sounds of babies crying and hospital beds wheeling become the background noise, shifting nervously in your seat that was in the emergency pediatrics unit waiting area. 

Hongjoong has his eyebrows furrowed, hunched over one seat beside you as he hangs his head in his hands, knees bouncing up and down. A middle aged nurse nasally calls on the next family waiting from the front desk, boredom laced in her voice. 

You sigh, uncrossing your legs and choosing to bite at the fingernail on your right hand once realizing you’ve already done the same to all the ones on your left. 

“It’s all my fault.” Hongjoong confesses, suddenly sitting still. 

You glance to your left, watching as he sits up slowly. 

“Last thing they ate together would’ve been at my house. I probably made them sick with something I fed them,” he dejects, hanging his head down in shame. 

“It’s all my fault, god I’m so stupid!” He beats himself up. 

You have half the mind to snap at your ex-husband, anger already filling up inside you earlier when you heard Eunbyeol suggest it was something she ate at her dad’s house. You really did want to yell at him for being so bad of a chef that he sent his own daughters to the emergency pediatrics unit, undeniably relieved that Seonghwa was working tonight’s shift. 

But those cruel words sitting on the tip of your tongue are thrown away when you glance down to see your ex-husband missing a shoe on one of his feet. 

Hongjoong rushed over here so fast with Eunseo that he left his shoe behind like some sort of fairytale, Cinderella. He hasn’t even realized he wasn’t wearing one right now.

You exhaled, knowing that if there's one thing you’ve learned while parenting, it was that to have patience and understanding was a virtue. Even for your ex-husband.

“It’s not your fault,” you sighed, staring at your hands folded in your lap. 

It feels awkward when Hongjoong stops tugging at his blond locks to look at you in surprise, continuing to speak as you place a gentle hand on his thigh. 

“That could’ve happened to anyone. We don’t know yet if it was because of the food. Let’s just pray and wait and see” your voice being a sign of reliability to him. 

The man is a little shocked at your supportive nature to tell you truthfully. He delivers all the things he needs to say through his grateful gaze alone, reciprocating a small smile. 

“Didn’t think I’d see you guys tonight.” Seonghwa chuckles, walking in before Hongjoong has the chance to reply. He comes from the patient's room wearing his dashing, white doctor's coat. “Together, at that” he mumbles under his breath before looking up and flashing you a polite smile while giving his worried friend a soft pat on the back.

Hongjoong holds his breath when he asks: “How are they?”

“Better,” he tells him, flipping through some papers on his clipboard. “But it was a big shock to their bodies. They need some rest at the moment.” 

The pediatrician tries not to show his smile, standing in front of you and Hongjoong while hiding his expression behind his clipboard as per his niece’s request.

To be fair, if someone had told Seonghwa earlier that evening that he would receive a fifteen minute pep talk from his best friend's twin daughters that day in the emergency unit, he would’ve laughed in their faces. 

Alas, life was always filled with surprises. Here’s what went down thirty minutes earlier in the hospital room:

“We’re trying to get them back together,” Eunseo announced confidently, sitting next to her sister on the hospital bed. 

Eunbyeol nodded, eyeing the dumbfounded medical professional standing in front of them with his clipboard tucked under his arm, hands in his pockets. 

“So.. you guys don’t need an IV drip?”

“It’s this whole entire thing, Uncle Hwa, we’ll explain to you later.”

It took a minute before Seonghwa reclaimed his composure as an adult, chastising the twins for pulling a false alarm over something like this. He made sure to make them promise him they wouldn’t do something stupid like this again. But after that, of course Seonghwa is immediately pairing to help them with their plan on getting his best friend back together with his ex-wife. The man is just tired of watching Hongjoong beat himself up half the time about missing you. 

“So you essentially want me to lie about the fact that you guys don’t have food poisoning, and were just faking this whole thing so your mom and dad would have a reason to see each other.” 

The twins nod, one of them pointing out. “And make sure to tell them we’re fine of course. Maybe throw in we’re like, really sick, but that we’ll live so it’s best if we get rest.”

“At like a cottage or something” the other chimes in, wiggling her eyebrows at the hint. 

The doctor sighs, scratching his neck sheepishly. 

When Seonghwa leads you and Hongjoong into the hospital room, both of you feel awful seeing your babies laying in their beds, dressed in the children’s gowns. 

Eunbyeol peeks open her eyes first, voice hoarse (she practiced). 

“Mom? Dad? Is that you?” she groans, pretending to clutch her stomach in pain. 

Both you and Hongjoong rush to each child, grasping their hands and stroking their heads softly with sympathy. 

“Hey baby, I’m here” you coo.

“I’m so, so sorry girls, it was probably all my fault. I should’ve never cooked for you guys earlier today.” their dad cries out painfully, looking down in shame.

You come to stand beside him, reassuring them both. “But what’s important is that you guys get better now. We want to make sure you get the rest you need” you say, making eye contact with your ex-husband. 

Seonghwa clears his throat, crossing his arms as he flashes a wink to the girls behind your backs. 

“They seemed to have been mentally exhausted as well,” He asks on purpose, watching as you and Hongjoong share a look with each other. “Have they been receiving proper familial support at home?” 

“I can’t even remember the last time I saw my parents in the same room together.” Eunseo weakly admits, showing a faint smile. 

As parents, you and Joong feel the most amount of guilt anyone could ever feel. You realize how exhausting and stressful the pickups and drop offs to each other's houses could’ve been, especially when you two were so busy with your respective jobs to spend time with your daughters now that it was summer break for them. 

Hongjoong smiles, holding both their hands and making a promise to them. 

“Make sure to rest you two. Tell me, is there anything you guys need right now? Anything you guys want I'll make sure to get it for you.”

”Do you guys have crunchy ice?” Eunbyeol blurts out loud, breaking her weak facade. 

Eunseo almost wants to shoot a glare at her sister but she realizes both of you are still looking at them. 

“I can get you some ice!” Seonghwa quickly assures you and his nieces, mouthing to them good luck for support as he shuts the door behind him. 

You sigh, coming over to stroke Eunseo’s hair and caress Eunbyeol’s hand. 

“Well? Is there anything else you guys need from us?” Hongjoong states, eyes soft in sympathy. You nod, waiting to hear their response.

“Let us know girls, anything at all.”

Eunbyeol and Eunseo finally take their chance, sharing a hesitant look before speaking at the same time. 

“We want to go to the cottage”

“Together,” Eunseo says.

“As a family.” Eunbyeol adds in.

You and Hongjoong share a silent look. 

Later into the night, the twins are finally discharged from the hospital, deciding that they would stay at Hongjoong’s mothers apartment which was closest nearby, considering they were both tired and immediately needed a place to rest. 

The car ride home is awkwardly silent, even as the kids are (what you think) to be fast asleep, hockey gear and a bouquet of flowers riding with them in the backseat.

It was at their request for you to drive them to their grandmother's house, wanting both their parents with them till the ride home. Hongjoong settled on driving your car and dropping all of you off, planning to take a taxi back home and pick up his own car in the morning. Despite your protest on how inconvenient that was, he insisted as he didn’t want to disappoint the twins.

But suddenly the man begins to regret his offer, currently driving in complete silence on the highway, eyes facing forward and shoulders tense. Quiet FM nightly jazz plays from the radio. 

You’re sitting passenger seat up front with him in what feels like forever, looking solely at the reflections in the window, the street lamp lights scattering across your face as you travel through the nighttime traffic. It’s awkward being together like this.

You hear him clear his voice, speaking softly so he doesn’t wake up the girls.

“So, are we really considering that cottage retreat?” he glances back at you. 

You sit up, straightening your back and exhaling as you secretly wanted to have avoided that topic of discussion.

“We can’t Hongjoong,” you reasoned, shaking your head. “I couldn’t possibly take a whole vacation from the dress shop. Not unless I had someone take care of it for me, which my staff probably aren’t ready to do.” you explained, voice tense.

Hongjoong nodded, understanding your point of view. “I realize that. I’ve got a few projects I have to record and demo with Eden.” he tells you, an arm placed on the wheel with his sleeve rolled up. His veins become perfectly outlined as he passionately tells you about his producing job.

He’s so hot like that.

Jesus what were you thinking? Cursing your mind as you clear your voice and try to change the topic.

“How’s everything been going then?” you say stiffly. He nods, still awkward with sharing conversation with you. 

“Um, it's going good. You?” he asks.  

“Fine.” you swallow. 

Silence prevails. He’s first to speak again, building the courage to say the next thing in his mind. 

“I’m willing to put things on hold if I need to.” He confesses. 

Hongjoong continues to drive normally after having said that. Now it becomes your turn to stare at him now, watching how he glances at the side mirror, switching lanes swiftly like the pro-driver he was. 

“What do you mean?”

“Honestly, I think it would be good for the girls,” he admits, calling you by your name. Even hearing him call you your name feels weird. It feels foreign, like it almost wasn’t yours. 

“Hongjoong-” you warn, shaking your head at the warry possibility. 

“Just hear me out, alright?” He states firmly, making you quiet. 

He glances back into the rear view mirror, watching your girls peacefully asleep with their heads leaning against each other. 

“It’s been almost seven years. Seven years since they’ve last seen their parents speak to each other without breaking into a fight. Tonight was the first time they saw us together without having to plan a drop off and pick up in god knows how long.”

Hongjoong licks his lips, gripping the wheel as he emphasizes. “Seven years since they’ve gotten a goodnight hug and kiss from us at the same time in one place.”

You scoff, turning to face him properly this time. “I don’t know why you’re acting as though we can make this request of theirs come true Hongjoong. This is a big deal-”

“It is a big deal!” he exclaims, trying to get his point across. “I can see how badly our daughters want us to both be in their lives more, to acknowledge the fact that the other still exists after splitting apart.”

He sighs. “Us, not acknowledging each other’s existence at all is worse than if we had to see each other regularly.”

You bite your lip, getting angry. “So what Hongjoong? You’re saying you want to suddenly play family with them at the cottage?”

You shrug your shoulders. “Do you really think we can pretend to be normal parents to them without fighting like we are now? There’s a reason why our current schedules work. Don’t make me seem like the bad guy for not wanting to take them.” You glared, pointing a finger at him. His jaw locks. 

“You fully knew the lifestyle changes we would need to make as a couple when you signed those legal papers—”

“Well then did you also predict everything that happened after you brought me those papers?” He spits like venom, gaze hard as he clenches the wheel.

You blink your eyes at his words, pressing your knees together at his sudden attack. 

You don’t remember clearly if you even meant what you said at the time when you threw those papers at him seven years ago. But all you still know is that Hongjoong was just as stubborn as you were, making up his mind to sign them in the end regardless.

Looking in the rear view mirror, you muttered to him quietly. 

“Don’t raise your voice. The kids are sleeping.”

Their dad scoffs, muttering a sure, under his breath as he switches lanes. 

The kids were in fact, not sleeping, and very much awake. Eyes closed but ears wide, as they were listening in to the first real discussion their parents were having in so long. Or perhaps it was an argument?

At the right turn into his mother’s apartment’s underground parking lot, Hongjoong shuts off the engine, getting out of the car without another word and shutting the door in your face. 

You pinched the bridge of your nose, hear the back door open. 

You watch in the corner of your vision as his demeanor immediately changes, softly caressing Eunseo and Eunbyeol’s hair. 

“Hey girls, we’re here now. You gotta wake up.” He coos.

They yawn theatrically, pretending to stretch their arms. 

“So soon?” Eunbyeol mumbles.

A few feet ahead, you see your mother in law walking out from the elevators, a knit cardigan wrapped around her small frame. You smiled, getting out of the car and greeting her first. 

“We’ll leave Eunbyeol’s hockey gear with you for the night if that’s alright Mom-” 

Hongjoong’s words are cut off as the woman who birthed him walks straight past him, ignoring him and immediately taking you in her warm embrace, eyes forming crescent moons. 

“How are you my dear?” she asks, causing you to smile and hug your mother in law affectionately. “It’s been so long, I’ve missed you so much!”

Despite the break up between you and Hongjoong, you were thankful for one thing, and that was the fact that your relationship with Hongjoong’s family stayed strong, especially with Mrs. Kim.

“I’ve missed you too” you tell her genuinely. “I’ve been good, I’m just sorry for dropping them off so suddenly at your place,” You say, feeling apologetic for waking her up late into the night. 

“We had a bit of a situation,” you explain, watching as Hongjoong collects their things. 

She shakes her head, reassuring you. “Nonsense! Why would you be sorry for that.” she grins, turning her head at the car. “And where are my girls, may I ask?”

At the sound of her voice, Eunbyeol and Eunseo dash out from the back seat and into their grandmother's welcoming arms, pressing soft kisses to her cheeks.

Hongjoong is the only person that stands all alone, awkwardly holding the bouquet of flowers with heavy hockey gear and a duffle bag perched on his shoulder. 

“Oh, how I’ve missed my little squirrels!” she exclaims using their signature pet name and happily reuniting with her grandchildren. 

She turns her head, face falling at the sight of her son and lips pursing into a frown. 

“And where on earth have you been? Not giving me a call!” she snaps, slapping her son on his back. Eunbyeol laughs out loud while Eunseo tries to keep her giggles in. 

You hear your ex husband protest to her while you close the back seat door. 

“OW! I’ve been busy alright?” he mumbles, massaging his sore arm. 

Your mother in law takes both the twins hand’s on each side, nodding her head to you. 

“Leave all the kid’s stuff to Hongjoong, he’ll take care of it darling” she smiles sweetly, sending a glare to her son to take a hint and be more of a gentleman to you. She walks away with her smiling granddaughters, exchanging light-hearted giggles and excitement. “Bye, mom!” The twins wave back. 

Hongjoong cranes his head up, sighing at the ceiling before taking Eunseo’s piano bag that you were holding in your hand in one swift motion, walking reluctantly behind the three. 

“Stay here. I’ll drop them off.” he briskly walks away, leaving you stunned. 

Hongjoongs words from before can’t help but replay inside your head as you wait for him to come back down. 

Before you guessed it, it was already the ride back home, and the car was painfully silent once again. In reality, you were each thinking deeply to yourselves about the possibility of the cottage retreat. Could you really be a mom and dad together as a couple to your kids?

“Are you giving your plants enough water?” He brings you out of thought, the car slowing down as he turns onto your street. 

You look up, giving him a confused look. 

Hongjoong nods in direction, following his eyes to look at the measly, dying flower pot perched on the steps of your flat’s entrance as the car stopped to a halt. “You know, it’s really hard for plants to die when they’re outside.” He says in amazement at your shit gardening. 

You scowl at him, asking him when he became such a plant expert all of a sudden. 

He continues to poke fun at you, smirking when he undoes his seat belt. Hongjoong suddenly leans over to help you unbuckle your own, face dangerously close to yours as he lowers his voice. 

“Unless their owner just really sucks at taking care of them.” 

His eyes gaze into yours for a split second, feeling your face heat up from the proximity. You let out a tiny gasp for air when he leans back in his own seat. 

“Fuck off” you replied harshly. 

“You should give them some more care,” he suggests, ignoring your swearing. 

You don’t reply to his stupid comment, refusing to look at him as you get out of the car. 

“I can go in by myself” you press, adjusting the strap of your purse on your shoulder. You didn’t think it was necessary to draw out your time with this man any further.

Hongjoong straightens his dress shirt as he moves to your side of the car, shoving his own car keys in his trousers as he locks your doors and hands over the keys. You take them hesitantly, watching as he rests against the car door, strong arms crossing against his chest. 

“Think about it at least.” he mutters to you. 

You look at him, eyes shutting softly when you realize he was still talking about the cottage getaway. Sighing his name is exasperation, you run a hand through your hair. 

“Hongjoong-”

“Would it kill you to spend a week with me and our daughters?” He scoffs as he asks you straight up, looking at you in a way that makes you hesitate to say your next words. You observed one hand come to shuffle with the silver lighter in his trouser pockets. 

You stayed silent for a moment, genuinely thinking back to your daughters and what this meant to them if you went. What this would mean for you two as well. 

Finally, you look up to him, returning his gaze.

“I need time.” 

He nods, face serious. “I understand.”

“Let me think about it.” You mumbled. 

And with that you turn around, walking up the steps to your front door. At the sight of your flowerpot, you quickly remember his comment and snatch it in your hands, slamming the door shut to Hongjoong as he finally lets a soft grin break out on his face. Letting his back come up from leaning against the door, Hongjoong nods his head, satisfied enough at that answer, as he walks silently down the road while opening his Uber app. 

At least you’d give it some thought. 

Okay, maybe now you’ve given it too much thought. 

Sipping your fifth glass of wine of the night, you’re sitting, back hunched over with your knees tucked into your chest on the breakfast table chair, zoning out as your best friend Sophie continues barking at you and your inconsistent commitment. 

“I don’t even understand why you’re considering going! Does the man realize what it takes to leave your own shop for a full week?” she fumes, adjusting her royal jelly sheet mask while cursing at your ex-husband for pressuring you into going to the family retreat. 

“Not everyone can just pack their bags and go swimming at the cottage, Jesus Christ” she rolls her eyes. 

“He didn’t pressure me,” you told her pouting. “He wants to do it for the kids” you mumbled looking down as you defended him. 

You invited your best friend Sophie over to your apartment that evening for your weekly slumber party, a time you each looked forward to dedicating a bottle of wine and chardonnay over some gossip, spilling all the uneventful drama in your lives. 

Perhaps you revealed too much drama to your best friend tonight. 

“I don’t think I would mind going, to be honest” you hiccup, words slurring. “I haven’t had a vacation in so long, Sophie, and the girls really want to go! I would feel bad for leaving them with nothing to do this summer.” confessing through the alcohol. 

Cheeks flushed, you sigh as you play with your silk robe mindlessly while Sophie shakes her head at you, one hand coming up to snap at you and bring you back to reality. 

“Hello? Earth to Ms. Divorcee?” She sighs, rolling her eyes in frustration. “You said you wanted to set boundaries with him! To cut the line straight and keep your distance so you could get over your feelings for him! Show him who’s boss!” 

“He said he’s willing to put his music projects on hold for us,” you muttered quietly, the thought making your heart weak as you smiled at the memory of Hongjoong teasing you about your flower pot. Your chest blossomed with warmth now. 

Sophie sighs, shaking her head as she thinks just how differently you were feeling four wine glasses ago.

“Listen, honey, I’m just warning you in advance” she sips the golden liquid in her glass before placing it on the table. 

“Take it from a girl who’s had three divorces. I mean look at me! I’m still somewhat young, I’ve got no kids, no responsibilities, filthily rich, and not once have I had to pay for my own divorce settlement fees!” 

You nod mindlessly, eyes blinking softly under the bright kitchen lights. 

“What you need is a provider, sweetheart,” she crooned, caressing your head. 

“A guy who won’t leave you stressed and unimpressed like Hongjoong does.”

You continue mindlessly nodding your head at her words, ears perking up when you hear small footsteps come down the stairs. 

“Hi mom, Hi aunt Sophie.” Eunbyeol greets, eyes glued to her iPad that Eunseo trails after from behind, whining how it was now her turn to play Super Mario.  

“Hi girls,” Sophie replies like the cool, hot aunt she is, eyes shut as she’s concentrating on giving herself a collarbone massage right now. 

“Hey sweetheart,” you mumbled, smiling at your daughters standing near the fridge getting a glass of water. 

“Say, did your dad tell you guys anything about the cottage?” You blurt out loud, avoiding the look that Sophie gives you. Eunbyeol looks up from the glowing screen, ears perking in interest. “No, not much, why?” 

Eunseo snatches the iPad from her twin, coming over to you. “Did Dad say we’re going?” She asks enthusiastically, eyes widening. Sophie is quick to assure them. 

“Now of course not girls, your mother here was just-”

“Oh fuck it, why not?” you say confidentially, shining a bright smile. “Let’s go to the cottage!” You exclaimed in drunk excitement, all three girls staring at you with their jaws hanging at your sudden profanity as well as your final decision. 

Oh, how dangerous the effects of a bottle of wine were. 

Eunseo and Eunbyeol immediately embrace each other in a passionate hug, squealing in excitement that their plan actually worked. You and Hongjoong were now both convinced. “Oh my gosh, we’re going to go as a family!” They cried in happiness. You giggled at their joy, reciprocating their enthusiasm.  

Sophie leans back in her seat defeated, shaking her head with pursed lips as she picks up the whole Chardonnay bottle and sips it. 

“Oh whatever. . . This isn’t my problem anyways.” 

When Hongjoong drops by the next morning to pick up Eunbyeol and Eunseo from your house for the weekend, he can’t lie but be a little heartbroken at the way his daughters ignore his kiss to them first thing. They instead, immediately shove the cottage advertising pamphlet in his face with victorious grins. 

“See! We told you mom would say yes!” 

“Say yes to what?” He pouts, avoiding the paper and obsessively trying to peck a kiss to each of his daughter's cheeks. The idea of going to the cottage almost slipped the busy man’s mind after almost a week of no news from you. 

“What’s so important that you guys don’t even say hi to me anymore?” he sulks.

Eunseo giggles, fighting back her laughter when her dad tries to tickle her with his kisses. 

“We’re going to the cottage!”

Hongjoong stills himself, leaning back to make sure he heard her correctly. 

“We’re what?”

Eunbyeol, taking after her mother, has a cheeky expression on her face as she places her hands on her hips and sasses her father. 

“Pack your bags and swimming shorts, daddy, we’re going on a family vacation!” 

In perfect timing, you manage to stumble out your front door, coffee mug in hand and mid-yawn when you realize Hongjoong is already staring at you in shock. 

“What?” you snap, still grumpy from your slight hangover. “You’ve never seen a woman wake up before?” You replied, asking your kids if they packed all their stuff. 

The twins watch as their dad stands up from his crouched position. 

“You’re going to go to the cottage?”

At Hongjoongs words you freeze, everything coming back to you all at once. The wine, the twins, the promises, it hits you like a moving truck. 

“Well…”

“No take backs mom! You said it yourself last night that you were excited to go to the cottage!” One of the twins pointed out. 

Hongjoong doesn’t take his eyes off of you. 

“I-I did say that, didn’t I?” You chuckled sheepishly, toes curling at the rookie mistake you made in parenting 101: saying yes when you should’ve said no. 

Your ex-husband quickly tells the kids to put their things in the trunk, promising he’ll be right with them after talking to you. As Hongjoong dashes up the stairs in his white polo golf shirt, you feel slightly exposed being in only your silk slip dress and robe. 

“I didn’t realize you’d be here so early” you mumbled, looking down at your toes. 

He ignores you. “So I’m guessing we’re going then?” He smirks, looking at you with an expression of undeniable cockiness and peaked interest. 

You shrug nonchalantly. “Let’s surround the focus of this trip towards the kids” you remind him, straightening your back.

Hongjoong nods, agreeing with you wholeheartedly. “Of course, that was my intention from the beginning,” he smiles. 

You swallow the lump in your throat, unnoticing his stare drop at your breasts perking up from the cool morning air. You jump in surprise as you hear the honking of the car. 

“Come on, love birds! We gotta go back to dad’s to get our swimming stuff!” Eunbyeol cackles, leaning from the backseat into the driver's seat window. Eunseo already begins journaling in her hello kitty note book, an organized list of what she’ll need to bring to the cottage.

Hongjoong looks back at his daughters, before looking back at you with a smile. 

“Let’s keep in touch about details, alright?”

You nod silently, gripping your mug. At the sound of your nextdoor neighbor coming out, Hongjoong contemplates for a moment before quickly leaning forward, shielding you from their view with his backside. Clearing his throat, Hongjoong nods his head to the inside of your house, leaning forward to whisper to you. 

“Think, um, you should get inside, it’s getting cold,” he mutters, his dimples faintly showing. You glare up at him, “I’m going to say goodbye to my own daughters”. Still clueless to what he was referring to. He grins, shrugging his shoulders before looking at you. 

“If you insist. Just thought you wouldn’t want your neighbor to see what I can see, would you?”

You gasp at his words, looking down at your chest to see what he means before wrapping your robe around you. You quickly waved goodbye to your girls before you shut the door in Hongjoong’s smug face. 

It’s now become the second time you’ve done that.

Thankfully, the next time you see Hongjoong you’re wearing a much more appropriate outfit. In a white cotton blouse and casual jean shorts, your effortlessly chic vacation outfit was the only highlight today, considering the day you had been internally dreading for so long was finally here. 

You tried to take deep breaths while scurrying all over your house and finishing some last minute packing. Reassuring yourself that a family getaway couldn’t kill you. 

Right?

Reservations at the cottage were made over the phone last week, booking a house with the perfect lake side view, access to the forest trail and close proximity to the offered activities. It would only be a seven day stay, both in your respective rooms, (you clearly emphasized you and Hongjoong had to have separate ones) while the twins would lodge together. You had no intention of interacting with your husband alone together on this trip, apart from the quote on quote, ‘family bonding times’ you promised your daughters. And yet why were you here sweating nervously like a sinner in church?

“What a hot lady!” Eunbyeol wolf-whistles at your outfit when she walks through your bedroom doors. You jump at the sudden entrance, realizing Hongjoong was already here to pick you up with the girls.

A pair of black designer sunglasses slightly too big for her sat perched on her nose. Eunbyeol smiles before jumping onto your bed of clothes. You already know Hongjoong must’ve spoiled her and her sister with those, buying them a pair each.

“C’mon Byeol, off the bed” you quipped, packing your toothbrush as she reluctantly slugged off the covers. 

Your suspicions of Hongjoong buying them designer items are correct when Eunseo walks in, classily perching her matching white ones on her head before chastising her sister's tasteless compliment. 

“Elegant. She’s Elegant, Byeol. You don’t just go around wolf-whistling at people.” she rolls her eyes. 

“You look very pretty by the way, mom”

You smiled, nevertheless pleased at both their compliments and thanking them before going back to doing a last minute check of your things. 

Sun cream, clothes, makeup bag, swimsuit…

At the thought of your swimsuit you immediately blush, thinking back to how Sophie forced you to borrow her yellow bikini that left very little to the imagination. Despite your protests that you wouldn’t be needing it, she insisted. 

Hongjoong is last to walk through your front doors, swinging his car keys around his index finger and calling to his three girls from the downstairs foyer of your apartment. The man is clearly excited for the trip, he can’t lie. 

“Come on ladies, we’re gonna miss the chance to swim in that lake if we don't leave soon!” 

Hongjoong is your typical dad, except for the fact that he does not mess with dad!fashion. The producer is dressed classily from top to bottom in a loose-fitting designer button up with a pair of reformed denim pants, his pearl earrings and gold piercings complementing his outfit perfectly. 

Kim Hongjoong didn't play when it came to fashion. Even as a father. 

“Coming!” You exclaimed, ushering your kids out of your bedroom and making your way down the stairs with your suitcase. Seeing that it would only be a week at the cottage, you tried to pack light, though you may have to reconsider that thought with the way you struggled to lift the case properly. 

“Need some help?”

A strong hand comes to help you, immediately inhaling the scent of Hongjoong’s cologne as he brushes his knuckles near yours. “Here, I’ve got it” he assures, making you step back and admire your undeniably fine husband. 

Ex-husband. You meant Ex-husband. Scratch out the fine as well. 

You watch from behind as he struts out the foyer, smiling and joking playfully with his twin daughters, carrying your luggage out the door with them. 

What was this trip doing to you?

Once you’re on route to the cottage resort and the GPS is set, the car is blissfully quiet, each and every one of you surprisingly at peace. Jittery excitement still lays deep in your daughters' minds as you overhear them talk about what they want to do first once they arrive. 

Hongjoong’s 2000s soft rock and ballad playlist is playing quietly throughout the speakers right now, relishing in the music as luscious, green trees flash by you from the passenger window. 

While Byeol and Eunseo distract each other on their own, Hongjoong turns to talk to you. 

“I’m not going to lie, it’s been forever since I’ve been on a road trip” he smiles.

You copy him, feeling good in the moment. “Same, I don’t remember the last time I went to one.” you confessed, thinking only of all the times you had in the past when you were a child and as a teenager. 

Even back to when you were a young college student, wide eyed and so innocent to the chaos of your first college retreat with Hongjoong. That was the summer you two began dating, and boy were you fools in love. You cautiously look to your husband driving, bringing up past memories.

“Do you remember that one college retreat we went on during second year?” 

The corners of Hongjoong’s lips are already grinning upwards, smiling as he reciprocates your expression. 

“Right, like I could forget that summer” he replies sarcastically, gripping the steering wheel. 

It’s an easy memory to digest. A time when you were both so young, filled with nothing but dreams and passionate love for one another. Love so deep, that you remember the nights you’d spend locked up with Hongjoong under the sweaty bed sheets inside your cabin, blissfully making love until the sun would rise and he would finally kiss you to sleep. Perhaps, it was that summer when you realized you were going to marry and be with Kim Hongjoong forever someday. 

Though it’s too bad, someday already passed. 

“Do you remember when Seonghwa got so drunk he ended up confessing to Jieun in front of all the girl’s sleeping cabins?” Hongjoong snickers, relishing in the embarrassing memory his friend always hates him for bringing up. You laugh out loud, remembering the memory. “Oh my god, yes!” You turned to face him, shaking your head. “In nothing but his underwear, right?” 

Hongjoong nodded, smiling with one hand on the steering wheel as he drove.

“Didn’t he end up jumping into the lake afterwards? With you having to go in and save him as well?” You share your laughter with one another, catching up on past memories as your twin daughters listened attentively in the back, reliving them with you together.

That's what makes the hour and half drive from the city into the wilderness feel so short, finally pulling into the graveled parking lot of the vast cottage resort. White suburban cottages lined along one another, a good amount of distance in between each for every family staying. 

As Hongjoong parked the car, the view outside was so glorious you had to hold your breath. Glistening clear blue waves in the lake reflect the bright sunshine from above. A light breeze is present today with the way the willow and oak trees swayed gently. 

“It’s beautiful” you gasped from as far as you got out of the car, stretching your upper body with eyes closed as you inhaled the fresh air. 

Hongjoong stills his movements, shutting the door before replying with his gaze caught at your backside.

“Yeah, it is” he smiles.

Both of you turn around at a loud voice coming from behind. “We’re gonna explore the campsites and souvenir shops first!” Eunbyeol shouts as she runs away with her sister's hand in hers, towards the wooden cabin that's settled further away. 

“What about lunch?” you call to them. 

“We’re not hungry!”

Hongjoong tells them to be safe, and to stick around nearby. You smirked, helping him unload the trunk as you told him. “They’ll be fine. They’re probably too excited to even think right now” you giggled, bumping shoulders with him. 

You feel the tension that was once so strong between you two fade slowly, walking up the wooden steps of your lodge and exchanging conversation with each other.

“Hey, I just want my babies to be safe” he admits, a grin on his face as he holds the cooler in his hands. You chuckle, shaking your head at his protectiveness. 

“Here it is!” he exclaims, setting the suitcases in the front foyer as he opens the door. “Lodge number 1117”

The two story cottage is larger than it appears from the outside, having a modern yet rustic interior that you and Hongjoong admired. It had everything you would need, from a well designed kitchen area to a cozy living room space.

“It’s perfect, the kids will love it” you beam, looking at the hanging hammock chair in the corner of the living room and the gray stone fireplace. It fit perfectly for your family. 

Hongjoong smiles, sunglasses perched on top of his head as he sets the luggage down near the kitchen. Walking up beside him, you help him unload the cooler and ice boxes first, settling into your new home for the next few days. 

“I’m guessing you still drink?” you ask, looking in his direction as you unloaded the case of beer you saw him bring from the trunk.

He gestured to the booze. “C’mon, it wouldn’t be a vacation without it, would it?” 

You wholeheartedly agreed, placing a few in the fridge before you shut it closed. 

“Hopefully, this time we won’t end up shit faced like we did back in college” you laugh, turning to face him. 

“I can already picture that time we got so drunk from that bottle of tequila my friend brought, we snuck out of the campsite and went to the forest and got lost.” you spoke, the memory a little foggy but nonetheless fresh in your mind. 

Hongjoong smiles, listening as you speak.  

“There wasn’t anything but trees and bushes in that forest!” You exclaimed, shaking your head. “What did we even do there?” 

Hongjoong replies nonchalantly, folding the cardboard box in his hands.

“I’m pretty sure we fucked.”

You momentarily freeze at his words, before letting out a soft awkward laugh, causing him to look up. 

“No we didn’t, Hongjoong” you immediately deny, not believing his words. But your brows began furrowing at the foggy memory, starting to realize you really couldn’t trust your alcohol tolerance, now as an adult and even back when you were a college student. Did you guys have sex? In a forest out of all places?

Hongjoong leans against the kitchen counter, across from you as he crosses his arms in front of his chest and smirks smugly. 

“Nope, I distinctly remember it” he recalls, taking a step closer so he was now in your space. 

“I held your hand in mind as we walked up that trail by the cliff. And gosh, were we horny that night, because I remember you complaining about all that dirt you got on your knees from giving me the greatest head i've ever experienced in my entire life-” 

Slapping your hands over his mouth to stop him from going on, you blushed as you glared at him. 

“Jesus christ,” you mumbled, rolling your eyes before confessing.

“I get it, we fucked.”

Suddenly, you and Hongjoong break out into giggles like varsity sweethearts again at the story. Though embarrassed and cringing internally from the way you acted as young adults, it was nice to share them together now. At the proximity in which you’re standing in, you can't help but stare at each other softly. A hand wraps around your waist, making your breath hitch as he pulls you closer. 

“What are you doing?” you grin, watching him.

He looms over you, able to tell that something sits right at the tip of his tongue that he hesitantly decides to say. “I’m pretty sure,” he mutters, staring at your face and cautiously grazing the skin under your blouse. You feel your breathing speed up. 

“I also held you like this in my arms as you were leaning against that tree” his grip gentle and immediately transporting you back to the scenery that night. His sharp tone contrasts his touch. 

“Yknow, the one we fucked against?” he teases to you one more time.

The scent of burning campfire. A cold, midnight breeze. The feeling of the rough cedar tree against your back as Hongjoong thrusted inside you with every delirious snap of his hips, holding you close while he fucked you to oblivion with only the forest animals standing witness to your sinful actions. The film replays like a cheesy R-rated romance movie in your mind. 

“Did you, now?” You gulp, looking up at him as you adjust to the foreign feeling of his touch on your hips. 

“Yeah. I remember it all” he states, smirking down at you with an intense gaze.

The memory dies down when you catch yourself staring at his lips, arms finding their way around his neck as he dives down to whisper softly to you.

“Do you remember too?” He asks.

How he held you in his arms. How he whispered in your ear while you came around his cock, drool and traces of cum littering the corners of your mouth while Hongjoong didn’t care if you were stretching his flannel from how hard you were tugging at the material.

You nod. “I do,” you muttered, lashes fluttering as you felt as though your heart wouldn’t stop beating. “I remember you kissed me on the lips,” you confessed. 

Perhaps you wanted him to do it again right now. 

He looks in your eyes, searching for your approval that you desperately give, breath hitting each other's faces as he slowly leaned down to try and connect your lips. His chest is pressed against yours, and you begin to realize you haven’t shared the same breath like that in so long. You were so close to kissing right then and there.

If only you leaned in closer…

“We’re back!”

You push Hongjoong across the kitchen, shoving his hip painfully into the marble counter and ignoring his high-pitched groan of agony as you immediately look away to avoid suspicion, continuing to grab the beer from the icebox in front of you.

“Girls!” you exclaimed, voice wavering. 

Of course, Eunbyeol and Eunseo walk in with matching postcards and goodies from the souvenir shop in their hands, their sunglasses perched on their heads as their eyes lit up with excitement. They were still oblivious to the fact that they almost caught their parents about to make out in the kitchen.

“Dad, this place is amazing!” Eunbyeol deadpans, telling her father. “They even have jet skiing on the other side of the lake! We gotta go now!”

Hongjoong clutches his hip, pursing his lips as he hides his expression of pain and surprise. 

“Really? That's great sweetie”

Eunseo however, is quick to catch on.

“What were you guys doing?” she looks at you suspiciously. Her words hang in the air for a moment. 

“Were you guys about to kis-”

Hongjoong and you frantically scurry to find a plausible excuse, shuffling awkwardly. 

“I was helping your dad unload the cooler” 

“I was helping your mom get something out of her eye”

Both girls stare at you meekly. Eunbyeol scrunches her nose. “Huh?”

Plastering on a fake smile, you briskly leaped over the luggage nearby, ushering them upstairs before they had the chance to ask anymore questions.

“I think it’s time to unpack your things.” you watched their eyebrows quirk at the way you pushed them out the kitchen.

“We can do it on our own, mom! It’s really no big d-”

You clamp Eunbyeol’s mouth shut with your hand, blushing profusely as you walk away with them. 

Hongjoong stands there alone in the kitchen, rubbing his hip and wondering what the hell just almost happened.

The next few days, you and Hongjoong don’t discuss the incident between you two. Rather, the beginning of the trip after that event has become a painful performance trying your best to be eerily polite yet distant to each other in front of your children, as if that would make you forget the fact that you two almost kissed in the kitchen.

“Could you pass the sunscreen, honey?” Hongjoong would say awkwardly, turning his back to flash you a cheery smile on the lake deck as Eunbyeol and Eunseo watched you interact while floating in the cool, summer waters. 

You passed the bottle to your ex-husband while maintaining awkward distance. “Of course, darling!” 

“Thanks honey!”

“No problem sweetheart!”

This resulted in Eunbyeol and Eunseo looking at their parents in horror, the youngest twin muttering under her breath as they discussed an urgent change of plans.

“We have to get them to stop being weird.”

Apart from that, the ‘family bonding time’ promise to your daughters was maintained, and each day was an adventure for all of you in terms of what you would do together next. An accumulation of forest trekking, water-skiing and outdoors barbeques on the patio of your cottage made everyday feel more and more special for your girls, seeing how they relished in having both their parents with them at the same place and time. It became moments of peace and resolution that eventually became special for you and Hongjoong too. 

“I hope we stay here forever,” Eunseo blurted out one evening after a blissful day near the lakeshore, watching as the sun began to go down. She was busy licking the sticky sides of her melting ice cream cone in one hand, the other one held in yours. 

Hongjoong and Eunbyeol were a few feet ahead, laughing loudly and holding hands as they compared their fruit popsicles with one another to see whose was bigger. 

“You and Byeol would eventually get sick of going to the lake all the time” You smiled, the corners of your mouth turning up before her next words made the strings of your heart tug. 

“Sure, but at least you and dad could be together with us too.”

You watched as she ran up to her sister and dad, joining in on their fun as she began boasting that her ice cream was better than theirs. Hongjoong’s smile is the biggest you’ve ever seen it to be, looking down at his girls with a golden tan from the past few days spent outside, and hair slightly damp from swimming. 

Any person could tell the love in his eyes was as pure a father’s love for his girls could be. 

Her words stuck with you until that very night, where after dinner, board games, and much pacing back and forth in your own room before getting into bed, you decided to cautiously approach Hongjoong’s room on the opposite side of the second floor.

Bare feet padded across the wooden floors as you peeked through the sliver of the open door.

He's wearing an oversized sleep tee and blue pajama pants, getting in some nighttime reading before bed. His glasses are perched on his nose, intently reading his paperback novel. He looks as domestic as a husband gets. 

At the sound of your steps though, he sits up from his relaxed state on his bed, one arm that was supporting his head coming out as the other hand settles the book down on his abdomen. He looks surprised to see you. 

“Hi” he states, looking at you. 

“Hey”

Hongjoong’s expression immediately softened at your figure, watching as you shuffled awkwardly in front of him. The room is quiet. 

“Can I come in?”

“Of course,” He nods, setting his bookmark in the spine of the cover and turning his attention to you, offering you to take a seat on his linen covers. You see his polaroid camera with photos taken of Eunbyeol and Eunseo perched on a desk nearby. 

You don’t see the ones he secretly took of you, as those are in his drawers. 

“Don’t tell me you can’t sleep by yourself” he gently teases before watching as your smile doesn't reach the ends of your eyes. You wrap your silk robe closer to your body, feeling sort of vulnerable. 

“How do you like the resort so far?” He asks, watching as you played with your fingers absentmindedly. “Is the room okay?”

“It’s wonderful Hongjoong, better than I could ever have hoped for.” You spoke up, telling the truth.

It’s hard to arrange your thoughts in your head when it’s just the two of you in his room. The kids were already fast asleep. Now was your chance to just tell him how you felt. Why were you hesitating so much?

“Hey, look at me.” Hongjoong’s soft voice calls out to you, a protective hand coming out to caress the back of your head in habit. He can tell you want to say something, and the gesture makes you emotional, remembering how he always used to do that to ease your nerves when you were younger. 

“What’s wrong? Am I making things uncomfortable on the trip?” he worries about the boundaries you established with him at the beginning, watching as your lip begins to quiver and the emotions suddenly overcome you. 

“I just wanted to tell you I’m sorry.” you sniffled, tears forming near the brim of your eyes as you looked up at the father of your children. 

Hongjoong’s eyes widened, shifting through the covers over to you. “Woah, hey, shh that’s alright I got you” he coos, immediately going into dad mode and embracing you in his arms, letting your head rest against his chest. 

The action is natural, no longer foreign or weird, and you silently thank him for leaving reassuring circles on your back. Husband or not, Hongjoong would always be your best friend first. You had forgotten how much you missed this comforting side to him.  

“Tell me what you’re sorry about” he states, chest tightening at your wet cheeks before he slowly raises your chin to look him in the eyes. 

“For being mean to you for so long” you sniffle, a weakened state of emotional guilt eating away at you. You let him watch you carefully.

“I’ve been thinking about how happy the girls have been during this trip. A-And it kills me that we’ve been fighting for the past seven years, and that they’ve grown up seeing such bad parts of ourselves, of my own self” you ramble, confessing how you felt. 

You look up. “They’re happy because we’re together Joong. Because we’re not fighting or avoiding each other like we used to do before.”

He watches as you look up at him with tears forming in your eyes. 

“You’re such a good dad. And I realized you deserve to hear that.”

At the sounds of more sniffles, Hongjoong finally speaks, smiling as he brushes stray hair from your face. 

“I wouldn’t want anyone else but you to be the mother of our children, I hope you know that”

His truthfulness throws you off guard.

“I’m sorry too” he sighs, letting you sit up straight and look him in the eyes properly. “I haven’t been the best partner either, baby. We were both mean to each other.” he says, brushing a tear away from your face.

“I’m pretty sure you’ve thrown a hair dryer at me once before as well” he attempts to make you laugh, affection blooming in his chest when he sees he succeeds, wiping your tears. 

“But I already knew how you felt, sweetheart. I always know” he smiles, eyes mirroring a weak ache in his heart.  

“Married or not, we were once friends. And now we’re family” His voice turns deep, strong and dependable like the father he’s become.

“We can start over” you tell him, smiling as he folds his hands over your palm. “We can always do better from now and going forward. For ourselves, and for Eunseo and Eunbyeol.” 

Hongjoong nods, hesitantly for a split second before he leans over to press a soft kiss to your cheek, showing a gesture of affection that you longed for so long.

You shut your eyes, the kiss making your heart flutter. 

“Friends again?” He whispers, though silently wanting something more. 

You sighed, pulling him in closer to embrace in a hug. “Friends” you nodded while inhaling his comforting scent. 

The next morning, and for the rest of the remaining trip onwards, you and Hongjoong’s relationship dynamics did the equivalent of a 180 degree turn. 

It’s hard to believe you two really just wanted to be ‘friends’

Eunbyeol and Eunseo could tell by the way you talked to each other more, noticing you share more secret glances and fleeting touches that were innocent to the eye, but concealing a longing that you both tried to hide. You knew you couldn’t get carried away. You and Hongjoong were simply resolving a rough patch in your parenting. Not getting back together in a relationship. 

But after spending more time together while Eunbyeol and Eunseo became occupied on their own, it was hard keeping the interactions to a justified amount. Long walks in the forest, evenings spent cooking together, even cuddling together on the couch during family movie night. Thinking your kids were too busy watching the vintage Disney movie play on screen, when in fact, the real love story they were more invested in was happening right in front of their eyes, watching their parents falling in love again.

This led to the last event in their plan that they hoped would finally seal the deal. 

On Saturday night, the last night of your trip before you had to go back to the city, you and Hongjoong are surprised to find mini invitations left on your beds, scribbled in glitter pen and cursive handwriting reading out the following:

Gourmet Dinner Date for 2

Time: 7:30 pm

Location: Outdoor patio 

Dress code: Formal and Classy

You and your husband chuckled at the cards left on your beds, suddenly finding a twin each by your side and ushering you to get ready. 

“Do you and your sister even know how to cook dinner, Eunbyeol?” You questioned as your daughter rushed to push you into your walk-in closet, forcing you to get ready. 

She huffs, placing her hands on her hips looking offended. 

“At least my cooking skills don’t take after Dad’s, mom.” She mumbled, choosing your shoes for you. “Have some trust in a girl!”

Meanwhile, Hongjoong gets pampered by Eunseo in the other room, though in reality, her blunt critiques on her dads fashion are bruising his pride at the moment. 

“Dad, you have many normal clothes to wear. You have to chill with the ripped baggy jeans.” she demands, trudging through his closet to find something formal for him to wear. 

He begins to protest but his daughter shakes her head. “You’re supposed to look good for mom!” she huffs, searching on her own. At Eunseo’s words, the man starts to slightly worry, scratching the back of his head. 

“You and Byeol are gonna join too, right?”

She stops for a second, looking back to her father as she avoids the question and instead retorts back. 

“It’s just a date, Dad. Relax”

Back to what was happening in the other room at the end of the hallway, you huffed in frustration when you walked back into your closet after Byeol rejected another one of your outfits for the dinner date. 

“I have nothing else to wear, sweetie, these are all the clothes I have.” you came to terms with a hand coming to your forehead after having searched in despair. 

The ten year old shakes her head before pushing you out of the way and digging deep into your suitcase. She reveals a delicate piece of material you didn’t even realize you packed. 

“We got some help from Aunt Sophie and Uncle Hwa to pack you guys clothes that you could wear for a special occasion.” she wiggles her eyebrows, a smug grin on her face as you gap in shock. 

You inspect the dress, lips parting in disbelief as you feel the material. 

“I haven’t worn this since I was in college.” You uttered softly to yourself. 

At one longing look of the short dress, you shake your head, walking back into the closet to find something else. “I-I can’t wear this Byeol, what would your dad think?“ you asked nervously.

“Dad said he thinks your boobs looked hot in this dress so Aunt Sophie and I picked it specially” she looks up at you, proud of what she just said.  

You whip your head around, mouth hanging open in shock.

“Byeol! Where did you hear that from?” 

She sighs. “Dad had one too many drinks this one time and started talking about you guys back in college” she explained before shoving the infamous black dress in your hands. 

“Talked a lot about how pretty you were,” she draws out her words in a teasing voice. You curse your husband for his mistake.

You bite your lip as you stare down at the fabric in your hands. 

It was undeniable. You knew you looked amazing in this dress. You could testify from the amount of times Hongjoong ripped it off of you after countless night out’s filled with sexual tension and playful flirting. For god's sake, Eunbyeol and Eunseo could’ve almost had another sibling thanks to that dress.

“Fine.” you muttered bashfully, turning away as you walked into the closet to change. 

“But I’m just gonna try it on.”

Thirty minutes, one mental breakdown and too many outfit changes to count later, you walk down the stairs wearing the dress Eunbyeol had successfully persuaded you to wear. 

What do you know, the kid was right. Your boobs looked amazing in that dress. 

Not just your boobs, your whole body looked incredible with its strong curves and the beautiful fill it gave to the dress, making it slightly tighter than when you wore it as a twenty year old, but still all the more mature and sophisticated. You really did look hot.

Eunbyeol rushes down the stairs before you, catching up with her sister to inspect her job on their fathers preparation. 

“Well?” She says expectedly, looking at her dad. “Let’s take a look!”

He sports a simple yet timeless white collar dress shirt, the first few buttons undone as he wears a form fitting black dress-vest that accentuates his waist, dress pants paired to go along with it. Though simple, his silver rings pulled the outfit together, making him just as good looking and sophisticated as you were. 

Hongjoong’s back faces towards your front, watching as the man nervously shuffles his hands in his pockets.

“How do I look guys?” He gulps, adjusting his collar and sweeping his blond hair back. 

Eunseo rolls her eyes, a grin on her proud little face. “Do you even have to ask, dad?” She’s more than confident in the outfit she and Seonghwa coordinated together. 

He chuckles, shaking his head as he nervously tells them. 

“I want to look good for your mom, you know what I mean? She's a difficult woman to impress sometimes.”

“I’m difficult?” You tease, walking down the last few steps of the stairs. 

The man turns his head around, losing his breath at the sight of you standing there in front of him, wearing that dress that he hadn’t seen you wear for so long, looking breathtaking in every possible way. 

“Hi” you grinned softly, feeling sort of shy.

The way you fit in that dress made an insatiable hunger fuel inside Hongjoongs chest, eyes gazing at the way you strutted over in the black, lace covered material with your hair tied back and glossed lips turned upwards as your dimples showed. He breaks from his admiration when you quirk a brow at him, making the man almost fall to his knees and stutter uncontrollably. 

“I-I No I didn’t mean that-“

You giggle as you bravely take Hongjoongs hands in your own, shutting him up as you turn to your daughters standing in front of you, starstruck at your aura. 

“Outside, right?” you winked at them. 

“Right this way!” Eunseo enthusiastically leads you out back to the outdoor patio, a perfect view of the garden and lakeside coming into effect. Hongjoong slips his hand from yours, and slides it across your waist, pulling you into his side. 

“My parents are too cool” Eunbyeol sighs under her breath, watching from behind in awe.

Your ex-husband makes you swoon when he leans in to whisper softly. “You look breathtaking, sweetheart.” feeling an immense sense of pride at how lucky he was to make you the mother of his children. 

You blush, turning to him to whisper playfully back. 

“Not bad yourself.” 

You both look forward when you come to a stop at the patio steps, sheer amazement at the full preparation your daughters did for this event. Fairy lights were hung around the area, a table with two chairs on either side placed with a white table cloth and a bouquet of freshly hand picked flowers from the forest, battery powered candles that were sold at the souvenir shop lit in the middle and glowing softly. 

Eunbyeol dashes to the door when it rings, making you and Hongjoong furrow your brows. 

“Is someone here?” he asks, watching Eunseo fold a napkin over her arm like the pro waiter she was. The other one walks out, an oily fast food paper bag in her hands as she smiles. “Dinner is served!” 

“Turns out that diner 15 minutes away also delivers!” She chuckled, helping her sister plate the two cheeseburgers, fries, and vanilla and strawberry milkshakes. 

You and Hongjoong continue to watch in stunned amazement as the girls prepare the not exactly gourmet(?) but still impressive meal in front of you, their small hands working swiftly. 

“You guys prepared all of this?” You asked, getting a little emotional. They grin proudly, nodding their heads. “We called the place earlier and planned it all by ourselves!”

You pressed a kiss to each of their soft cheeks, thanking them both as Hongjoong did the same. 

“What did I do to get so lucky with my girls?” he smiles, ruffling their heads. 

“What about you guys?” You asked, watching as they slowly backed away to give you two some privacy. 

“Natalie and her mom invited us over for dinner and a sleepover tonight at her cottage,” Eunbyeol smiles. At the mention of their newly made friend that they had gotten close to over the week, Hongjoong looks at you then back at them. 

“What? But- ”

She cuts him off, rolling her eyes. “Her mom said it’s totally fine with her. She’s only two cottages down, and she’ll make sure we’re back in time again for tomorrow when we leave!” 

The two girls smile in excitement, though the both of you have your parental instincts kick in. 

“Please?” they begged, wanting you to let them go so that they could do this for you guys as much as they wanted to do it for themselves. “She’s waiting for us now!”

Hongjoong feels guilty. “C’mon, you guys should still join us!”

Eunseo immediately shakes her head, declining the offer. 

“Tonight is all about you guys. We don’t want to intrude” she chuckles, bumping shoulders with her sister who chips in.

“We’ll text you guys in the middle to let you know everything’s good of course” 

You and Hongjoong smile, a feeling of immense proudness overwhelming you from seeing your daughters act so grown up. There wasn’t anything else you felt grateful for more. 

“Thank you girls.” you muttered softly, watching as they flashed you a wink before hurrying out through the backyard door. 

“Don’t get all kissy in the backyard!” Eunbyeol teases, making cheesy smooching sounds with the back of her hand as her sister rolls her eyes and shoves her out. 

Before you know it, you’re left standing with just the sound of smooth jazz playing on the patio speakers and the buzzing of the summer cicadas. 

“She takes after you, I hope you know that” You told Hongjoong softly.  

He chuckles, “Not as much as you.” He gestures to the table. “Shall we?” 

And that’s how the next few hours seem to pass by without even realizing. 

You see, there was a reason why you fell in love with the man sitting in front of you, and you’re just beginning to remember it now. Being with Hongjoong felt as if the moment was everlasting, and you could testify that from the amount of laughter and deep conversation that was shared over dinner, bringing you to sit on that patio until the sun had set. Every so often you’d smile again at the thought of the twins preparing this all for you. 

“I don’t remember the last time I’ve been on a date like this” You blurted out after laughing about something, taking a sip of your strawberry milkshake through a straw. 

“Oh, so we’re going on dates now, are we?” Hongjoong grins, making you roll your eyes at him. 

You lean forward on the table cloth, watching as a glimmer passes through your husband’s eyes while he sits back in his chair, cocking his head to the side as he clears his voice. 

“But you’ve gone on dates after we split, haven’t you?” he asks, leaning forward in interest now, letting his chin rest on his palm. 

You shook your head slowly.

“Nope. Not since signing those papers” you revealed. 

Hongjoong furrows his brows in surprise. “And why’s that?” 

You suddenly didn’t have an answer. “I-I don’t know, I just…” You began, watching how he looked at you with an unreadable expression. You smiled, looking down and suddenly feeling embarrassed. 

“I guess I was too focused on running the bridal shop, I couldn’t find the time to.” You use as a cliche excuse. 

“Bullshit” he retorts back immediately. 

“It’s true!” You protested, throwing a fry at him that he dodges, landing on his finished plate. 

“You always did say back when we were younger that you wanted to be a designer. And look at you now” he admires, letting the candle lights shine a youthful glow to your face. 

“You always said you wanted to become a music producer and write your own songs.” you reciprocated, smiling as you soaked in the presence of one another. “And here you are now.” 

You think for a moment before asking the same question. 

“How about you?” 

Hongjoong silently shakes his head as his answer, though silently thinking about something else. The music changes to some old Billy Joel song in the back. You don’t realize it, but Hongjoong smiles to himself when he realizes the girls added it to the playlist. Of course they had to, it was one of the songs you played at your wedding. 

“What were we thinking when we got married like that?” You asked out loud, looking at how far you’d both come. You definitely skipped some of the order of the stages of a normal relationship. 

“I mean, we had no money, no prospects. Hell, we didn’t even have a car, Hongjoong!” you realized.

Your husband laughs, sitting straight and letting some skin show through his unbuttoned collar. 

“We were young” he justifies. 

“Yeah, and stupid too,” you pointed out, feeling the summer breeze pass by. It felt good to sit here like this with him.

You wondered, could sitting here like this with Hongjoong be a regular thing? After this trip, would you be able to walk back into each other’s lives again like this? 

As both parents and lovers?

Hongjoong brings up something you wouldn’t have expected him to. 

“Do you remember when we first found out about Eunseo and Eunbyeol?” he questioned softly, looking at you. 

You blink, taken aback. Suddenly you’re back in your college dorm washroom, sobs wracking through your body as Hongjoong who had only just sent his first few mixtapes to recording stations and companies nearby, pulled you close into his chest, eyeing the two lines left on the counter while he caressed your back. Only twenty years old and figuring out what you wanted to do with your lives, you were suddenly stuck in a sudden situation that had made you feel like your dreams would have been given up on completely. 

“I do,” you told him, pulling yourself from the memory. 

“I remember because in that moment I felt like the whole world was caving in”. You laughed, though it wasn’t fully cheerful.

“I don’t regret it, though” Hongjoong replies after some thought, gazing at you with truth in his eyes. 

You shook your head. “Of course. Neither do I.” 

It was a blessing to have two beautiful daughters as the product of your love.

“I don’t regret you either.” Hongjoong states.

You lock gazes, unable to take your eyes off of his face. 

“I loved you when I first met you and I still loved you when we divorced,” he says all at once, making your breath hitch and heart waver. 

“Don’t say that.” you tell him, looking away and suddenly reminding yourself you’re still divorced from the man sitting in front of you. 

How could he still love you after all this time? How could you feel the same about him?

Hongjoong continues, shaking his head as he bites back the lodge in his throat and makes up his mind. He has to tell you. 

“Truthfully, I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you.” 

Don’t do this to me you begged silently.

“I’ve hurt you just as much as you’ve hurt me.” He swallows, thinking back to the times you already knew he was referring to. The times where you fought to the point where there wasn’t even anything worth fighting for anymore. 

“But you have given me the greatest gifts of my life.” He smiles, holding his tears back.

“And for that I will always love you.”

You push your seat from the table, suddenly feeling overwhelmed and wanting to avoid him.

“I can’t do this anymore.” you dejected, walking away from the patio and from Hongjoong.

There wasn’t anything else you could fake anymore. You couldn’t bear to hear the man you once loved, possibly even still love, say these things like he had a dagger lodged in his heart. Didn’t he know he was only going to do the same to you?

Hongjoong is quick to catch up, holding onto your wrist and turning you around, that your back collides with the nearest wall inside, pressing your fronts together and closing the distance.

“Why do you always run away from me? From the possibility of us?” He exclaimed, voice breaking. His heart crushed at the way you turned your head, hot tears already clouding your vision. 

“Because ‘us’ can’t happen again, Hongjoong!” You cried, staring up at the man you once promised your life to.

“Don’t you get it? Us going on this trip isn’t a sign to get back together. What would we do seven years after breaking up?”

“We could do it” He states firmly, staring you down, both your chests heaving.

You bite your tears back again. “No we couldn’t, honey. We would be pretending to think we solved our marriage. What would we do about our daughters? After putting them through our constant fighting— ”

He slams his lips to your own, shutting you up as you painfully resist his touch. Your hands came up to push him away, but at the sudden gesture, you’re already giving in and sobbing softly, letting him hold you for just one last time. 

Your lips mold so perfectly, it almost hurts how much you missed this feeling. To have him slot his arms around your waist, pull you in close, and cherish you. You almost forgot this feeling. 

He pulls away softly, watching your lashes flutter, pleading to you for a chance as he leans closer, making your breath hitch. 

“We could be together as a family again,” he states firmly, your name leaving his lips in a desperate plea. “We never know if we try—”

You drown out his words, looking up with tears falling as you cut him off. 

“Seven years ago I gave you those papers to sign, thinking that you would’ve chased after me,” 

Hongjoong holds his breath, watching as the next words stumble from your mouth. 

“I realize now, how stupid I was to think that.”

“I didn’t know you wanted me to chase you”

Shoving his chest away while mustering the last of your strength you uttered. “Of course I wanted you to chase me.” You let go of his hands. “It’s too late either way”, walking away from the defeated man.

Hongjoong stands alone near the patio entrance, watching his tears fall to the wooden floorboards. Holding the ring he had kept hidden in his trouser pocket, he plays with it in his fingers, silently wishing he had given it to you sooner. 

It rains the next morning on your departure back to the city. Perfect, considering it reflects the sudden storm of utter depression that falls upon your family. Long gone are the cheerful giggles and longing stares that were shared between you and Hongjoong during the ride to the cottage. 

There was no room for that, not after last night.

Eunbyeol and Eunseo sat slumped in the backseat, rain hitting the roof of the car as they mindlessly played on their cell phones. Really, they were peeking from behind every so often and watching their parents sit in the front seat with tension so thick, you could’ve cut it with a knife. 

What had they done wrong? They planned the trip, the activities, the dinner— it was all perfect. And yet why were you still fighting with each other? 

These questions racked in their brains, baffled to have witnessed the sight of their parents refusing to talk to each other after walking back from their friends' sleepover. 

Eunbyeol and Eunseo felt as useful as matchmakers without a couple, feeling their efforts all gone down the drain. 

At the sudden ring of your cell phone, you pick up, answering at the voice of your assistant. 

“I’m driving back up right now”

Hongjoong continues focusing on the road, the occasional wiping of rain from the windshield wipers on the front window. 

“Yes. That’s okay, I'll take care of it.” You muttered, glancing at the rear view mirror for a moment. Your twin daughters immediately sigh, having an idea of what to expect when you say those familiar words. 

“Thanks for letting me know.” 

You hang up the phone, 

“One of us isn’t going with you, are we?” Eunseo asks, making you look back at her with a sigh. 

“No, you’re not” You confess, apologetic. ‘I’m sorry honey. I really am.”

You look back facing the front, swallowing as you told Hongjoong. 

“You’ll have to drop me off at the studio. Some things aren’t working out with the client so they need me to come in and take care of it.”

He nods, unphased as he continues to look straight. 

“Will you be fine with the girls?” You asked carefully, watching them as they were slumped in the backseat.

Hongjoong grips the wheel before turning to you. 

“I‘ll be fine. Don’t worry about it” sending a small smile, though it doesn’t fully reach his eyes. 

The twins thank god that at least neither of them had to choose to go back home with either parent. 

They would’ve hated that more. 

After barely being able to depart and say goodbye to your daughters in front of your studio, holding them close for a warm embrace and thanking them for an unforgettable weekend, Hongjoong drives off with his daughters, an empty feeling cascading his thoughts. He puts on a smile still, trying to cheer up his girls. 

“What do you want to do first when we go home? Want to unpack and then eat? We can eat and then unpack. Or we could- ”

Eunseo crosses her arms, having been fed up for far too long.

“Dad, you must be out of your mind.” 

Hongjoong stills, furrowing his brows and peeking at the first born who crosses her arms, holding an attitude. 

“Eunseo, what are you- ” 

“You’re telling me you and Mom just spent a whole entire week together at the cottage, had the best time of your lives since separating with one another, and now you’re just going to go back to not speaking or talking to each other again?”

Hongjoong blinks at his daughter’s sudden outburst, already making a turn into the driveway of his house.  

Eunbyeol now reciprocates her twin, looking at her dad as she slouches beside him, coming near the front seat area. 

“She’s got a point dad. Do you really just not love mom anymore?” She worries, looking up at him genuinely concerned. 

Hongjoong doesn’t know how to answer these sudden questions right now, stuttering to reply.

“Me and your mother are fine!” He lies, trying to reassure them. “That trip wasn’t just for us, it was also for you two to enjoy— ”

Eunseo asks the million dollar question. 

“If you still love Mom, why are you letting her go a second time?” 

With the engine turned off, it's gone silent. Two pairs of eyes staring at their father, awaiting his response. 

“Well? Are you going to chase after her or not?!” Eunbyeol groans, her fathers lack of response making her pull her hair. 

They were right. How could he have made the same stupid mistake twice?

Hongjoong struggles to put the keys back in the engine, telling them to put their seat belts back on. Their eyes begin to glow with hope.

“Do you girls mind staying at your uncle’s for a bit?” He asks hurriedly, punching into his cell phone to call his brother for a favor as he pulls out of the driveway. Eunbyeol squeals, hands clamping over her mouth as her sister speaks on behalf of them both. 

“Dad, if you don’t drop us off and get your butt over to mom’s right away, I’m gonna report you to child services.” she threatens, watching as he steps on the accelerator, heart pumping so fast as he smiles through the rear view mirror.

You sighed, holding up your cellphone to your ear. 

“Call me once she approves the design then,” you told your assistant through the receiver, one hand looking over the sheets of paper, highlighting the changes to the new blueprint. 

“Alright then, bye.” 

After hanging up the phone, you rubbed your temples, head pounding as you tucked the files back into the folder. 

The clock in your studio showed the hands about to reach seven pm. A few hours had already passed since coming back from your trip to the cottage, trying to forget everything by burying your focus into the new dress prints a client of yours requested, remodeling them after the original was rejected. 

Fingers worked away swiftly, comparing textiles and fabrics as you looked at the piles of papers and messy sticky notes in front of you. But yet the gears in your mind seemed to churn achingly slow, sighing as you repeatedly told yourself the same thing. 

Just focus on the dress, focus on the dress, focus on the dress.

Don’t think about him. 

The task is impossible. Your mind can’t help but slip back to what your relationship has become with Hongjoong, and what you were going to do now that those seven days were over. For so long you had deprived yourself from indulging in your love life, prioritizing taking care of Eunseo and Eunbyeol while juggling your job as a designer. Had you been doing it all wrong? 

Hongjoong’s words repeat in your head like a broken record player. 

I will always love you

Lies. That promise couldn’t be kept. Your divorce was a clear outcome of it. You and Hongjoong were two people not meant for one another. You were too different, all you would do is hurt one another, make life an unbearable living hell—

And yet you missed him. You missed Hongjoong so much. 

What was fucking keeping you from loving him? Was it your stubbornness? Was it really the fact that he didn’t chase after you? Or was it none of that and just your own self being stupid?

The front door of the studio opens, pulling you from your thoughts as you got back to the sketches. You called up from your desk as you worked quietly. 

“The studios closed for the- ”

Heavy breathing. The man who just walked in catches his breath from dashing out of his car and up the three flights of stairs, driving through almost an hour of traffic in pouring rain to be here in this moment with you.

“Hongjoong?”

He’s drenched, making a mess on the floor of the studio as the droplets fall softly one by one. 

Suddenly he's striding over to where you’re sitting in long steps before slamming his lips against yours. The kiss throws you off guard, the shock of his cold hands cradling your face makes you close the gap unknowingly. 

Linking your arms around his neck while kissing back passionately, you let your hands rest on his shoulders, pulling back for air as you panted heavily, catching your breaths and looking at each other with pure love and lust. 

“Why are you here?” you asked, feeling dumb because your heart already knew the answer. His hands wrap around your waist, desperate as if you would leave him again. 

But he’s just so fucking tired of that now. He just wants to love you now.

“I lost you once.” He breathes, eyes watering.

“I’m not going to lose you again”. 

Suddenly, everything that kept you from being with each other is thrown away. 

That hate, that fear, everything is gone because you realize you still needed each other. You’re still the same twenty year old couple standing in that dorm washroom, holding each other close and knowing it’ll be okay because at least you had each other. 

You grasp onto his damp shirt, pulling him down with such force that your lips meet again, taking charge as you finally allowed him to have you. 

“You’re a fucking idiot” you whined between kisses, curses escaping your lips when he softly bites the flesh of your neck to test the waters. “I hope you know that”

He agrees wholeheartedly, nodding as if he was already getting pussydrunk.

“I’m an idiot” he mumbles to himself, letting it escape his lips like a mantra. Well, he was stupid enough to only chase after you this late, so if his wife told him he was an idiot, then so he was.

“Let me prove how much I love you,” a hand comes to graze near the collar of your shirt. 

You gasped, watching as Hongjoong lifted you from your seat and rutted his hips against your core pathetically, your ass digging into the edge of the table.

“Here?” Your eyes widened, watching his expression turn dark. He presses kisses on your collarbone, making your hands grasp the wood for support. “Hongjoong wait,” you exhaled in a deep breath, heart beating against your chest.

But he doesn’t give a shit. He’s tired of waiting. 

“It’s been too fucking long” he protests, ripping your top off. You’re dizzy from how abruptly he’s stripping you, latching onto his shoulders for support as you wobble from him unzipping your jeans and pushing them down, exposing you in nothing but your underwear and bra. 

And like the good little whore you are, you immediately spread your legs, letting Hongjoong get a view of the embarrassingly wet patch leaking through your panties as he’s crouched down to let you step out of the denim near your ankles.

Holy fucking shit

You stand bashfully, toes curling from how exposed and vulnerable you were being the only one naked. 

“Please?” you asked nicely, letting your foot rest on his shoulder as your pussy was now on full display for him.

You don’t have time to even finish the last word before Hongjoong dives in, lapping at your soaking cunt and humming in pure ecstasy at the taste. The muffled vibrations make you throw your head back, tugging on his locks to shove his face further. 

Hongjoong’s hands press into your thighs that cage his head in, leaving a grip that you guarantee with littering the flesh with red splotchy bruises. Did you mind? Not at all.

When his tongue pokes at the gummy flesh of your walls, you let out a full moan, echoing throughout the studio as the air begins to smell like sex. 

“Right there, yes” you urged him, leg beginning to shake from how weak it was getting. 

He's so invested, you fear he might suffocate any longer if he doesn’t pull back for air. So you grasp his head, pushing him away from his meal while you both gasped lightly.

You watch him wipe his slick covered chin with the back of his hand, not breaking eye contact as he stares. 

“You were just begging to be fucked for all these years, weren’t you sweetheart?” He teases. 

Though you wanted him to lap at your juices until you came, you knew you needed to still feel his cock inside after so long. 

Your fingers played with the hem of your underwear, smiling back at your husband. 

“And you were just begging to get a taste of this pussy, weren’t you, Joong?” wiping that smug grin off his face.

”Lay down for me” he demands, getting up so that one hand finds its way to the back of your bra to unclasp it. The other clears half your desk covered in wedding dress blueprints and sketches, making sure nothing would make you uncomfortable before he fucked you on that mahogany surface so all you’d remember would be his name. 

And people said romance was dead. 

When the bra slides off and your bare back hits your desk, you suddenly realize what Hongjoong’s intention was when he ordered you to do that. 

Soft mounds spill out as your breasts take their natural form, giving Hongjoong the perfect view of your tits. Pervert. 

He immediately latches his tongue on a nipple, taking his hand and playing with the other, twisting painfully. 

A cry escapes your lips, parting them open as you let him play with them as much as he wanted to. He smiles against the motherfuckers, knowing that shut you up perfectly. 

“Are you ready for me to fuck you now?”

“Please, Joong, I need you” you whined, submitting yourself to your husband. He already knows you’re in need of one last kiss, coming up to give his wife what she wants by slotting his lips against yours again, this time much harsher. 

“Tell me so that I treat you good, baby” he mumbles, pulling back and making you clench your thighs together. He undoes his shirt in the meantime, unbuckling his belt and pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek when you sobbed. 

“Fuck me, please” 

His fingers slide your panties to the side to press his aching tip to your wet core. 

“Like this?” He teases.

“Inside, Hongjoong” you emphasized, meaning what you said with the way your nails dug into a pile of papers nearby. Biting your lip from how sensitive and needy your cunt was. 

“I know, I know,” he murmured, smiling to himself after messing with you. 

“I just missed this pretty cunt” before in one strong thrust, Hongjoong’s bulging tip enters inside your walls, giving you a stretch you forgot how much you loved. You whined softly. 

“Shit” he curses, relishing how the buildup finally led to this moment. 

The man is ravenous, but he’s genuinely trying his best to ease the painful stretch as you adjust to his thickness, nipping your neck in a trail of hickeys and love bites posessively.

With every thrust he makes, you arch your back, pencils and papers shuffling near by you. 

“Fucking look at my wife” he admires proudly, watching the woman he loves bounce her tits at every thrust of his cock. 

“S’too much” you caved in, shaking your head at the stimulation. 

You claw at his arms, head turning to the side as your eyes roll back from pleasure. 

“I know, mama, I know” 

He grabs a tit in his left hand, the right one coming down to play with your clit, pressing slow circles near where you were connected. 

“Fuck, I missed these” He rasps, savouring the feeling of your soft flesh in his hand, making you throw your head back. 

“Missed how they looked when you were pregnant” he says, thinking of how ethereal you looked when you were knocked up with his kids. 

“God, at this point I’m gonna get you fucking pregnant again” Hongjoong grunts, snapping his hips deliriously back and forth. He envisions you round and full, fulfilling his inner fantasy. 

“Shut up.” You spat, breaking the mood as you bit your lip to suppress a moan. He almost laughs when you then crane your hips back to give him easier access to keep penetrating you. The desk shuffles. 

“Your mouth is saying one thing, honey, but your body is saying something else” 

After hearing his words, you suck him in further, both of you now getting close. 

“M’close. M’so close!” you whimpered, sitting up so that now Hongjoong could hold you in his arms, caging your body so his cock could stuff you better. 

Your mouth hangs open in silent bliss, hands scratching his back. You leaned into his ear, making the final chord inside him snap. 

“Make me cum, daddy” 

And just like that, you’re clenching around Hongjoong’s massive cock as a creamy white ring begins to form. Hot ropes fill you up inside, tangled in a sweaty mess as he purrs, caressing the back of your head again in habit. 

“So fucking good, sweetheart. You did so good for me”

The sounds of your breathing fill the studio, a pencil or two rolling quietly away on the ground from being shoved off the desk. He shakes his head when you try to pull your sweaty bodies away, hair sticking to your neck but feeling the way he refuses. 

“Just let me love you,” he mumbles into your shoulder, dick softening inside you. “Just for a moment.”

You’re too tired to say anything back, so you finally give in. 

Seven years passed by you two without even realizing how much you still loved each other. Though you wouldn’t be able to get that time back, for once, there was something that you and Hongjoong agreed upon. 

You had no intention of wasting that time any more. 

𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄:

Months later, and it still takes everything in Eunbyeol and Eunseo hearts to not scream at the sight of their parents when they walk hand in hand, smiling happily in public as they pick their daughters up from the first day of school. 

The girls jump into their parent’s embrace, eying the two silver rings they now wore proudly together. 

“How was school, darlings?” Hongjoong asks, pressing a kiss to Eunseo and Eunbyeol. 

“It was fun! We watched a documentary about lovebirds” she smiled, looking back up. You laughed softly.

“Which reminded me to tell you,” she grins, watching as you, her sister, and father all looked at her. 

“I hope you know that getting you and dad back together was my plan from the start.” she confesses, smirking at Eunbyeol who scoffs, crossing her arms. 

“Nuh uh, this was my idea first!” 

Before her sister could yell at her twin, you jumped in. 

“Plan? What plan?” You asked quizzically, both you and Hongjoong standing there confused.

“To get you guys to fall back in love again, of course!” Eunseo smiles, both her and her sister now giggling softly together.  

“How am I just finding out that there was a plan?” Hongjoong mutters, scratching his neck in confusion. You turned to the two girls, stopping in your tracks on your way to the car

“When did you two even think of all this?” grinning in astonishment as you felt Hongjoong slot his hand and intertwine it with yours. It felt natural now.

“Yeah, I'm curious too” he states, leaning close and becoming intrigued.

Your daughters look at each other before smiling. 

“It’s a long story.”

But at last, time is something you finally now have as a reunited family of four, walking back to your car, holding hands with a twin on each side.

Listening carefully, as your daughters start from the very beginning.

taglist: @vent-stink @dazzlingstarrs @vcutparis @xpixie @potatos-on-clouds @showingmafandomlove @bibbleypoof @kpop-will-kill-me @avantalem @beabatiny @gabrielle-brugger @nsixns @amaranth1ne @stayminho @myblovedjyh @kkeshia @rebekah-reads @yoonbroom @4kwp @butterflydemons @iwaizumiismybae @soobinsputnik @stayatinykatsy @atitties @justconniez @kitten4sannie @ghostskilledmyaddiction21 @cheolsthicthighs @morethingsfandom @geminiml95 @byuntrash101 @quailbagutte @syubseokie @newworldwritings @urmom26john @sleepy-kat-here @pearltinyy @hjshyhyssnmgwyjh @cursedeastern @starryunho @piratekingateez2001 @jiminbility @paumll @drinkingrumandcocacola @roomsofangel @channies-bbg-room @meanaonthemoon @teeztopia @pommelex @kiln9z @sanhwalvr @youresolivlie @edawg77 @a-0206 @summer-gyu @bvidzsoo @yoongzsmile28 @tournesol155

[kookinglikeachef]

How ATEEZ members tell you that they’re horny

Pairing: ATEEZ x Reader

Warning: YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CONTENT YOU CONSUME! [🔞, mdni]

━━━

kookinglikeachef: This was not requested but please start requesting more even though I have a bunch of unanswered ones that are half written and nowhere near completed. 😬

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Hongjoong:

Joong is a bit tricky. Maybe through words of affirmation or giving you gifts. No physical contact needed. Just simply through suggestive looks, body language, or conversation. He would feel a strong sexual attraction to you, but doesn’t necessarily want to engage in sexual activity. He prefers the anticipation and build up of desire than the act itself.

Seonghwa:

Hwa is like a very gentle and nurturing person. So when he’s “in the mood”, he’d take care of you more often than he normally does. Uses terms of endearment and loving phrases, indulgently. However, he’d try to hold himself back, like he’s afraid of making you uncomfortable. Doesn’t want to come across as perverted. HOWEVERx2, if your feelings are reciprocated he’d definitely finish what he started. Like sweet romance. Take you slow and deep.

Yunho:

Oh, Yuyu. I think he’s someone who’s multifaceted. He could be the least likely member to tell you that he’s horny because he doesn’t want you thinking he only wants sex. Would rather give pleasure than receive it. He could also be the one to tease you the most. Purposely pulls away from a heated kiss when he sees that you want it just as bad. Or he might also be very direct and palms you over your underwear while you’re *not* watching Spider-Man or something.

Yeosang:

Sweet baby just observes you. Won’t openly tell you so you kind of just figure it out yourself when he’s unable to take his eyes off of you, and would particularly stare at certain parts of your body he wouldn’t normally focus on. Subtly adjusts himself in his pants to be more comfortable. If asked, he wouldn’t be opposed to receiving intimacy from you.

San:

Straightforward pt. 1. Physical touches. Like holding you firmly by your hips, pressing your pelvises together so that you’d feel exactly how horny he is. He’d work you up with some ‘sexual-light’ talk. Calls you cute and stuff. Tugs on your clothing, fingers hooking the waistband of your underwear. Hands sliding down to squeeze your butt.

Mingi:

Becomes extremely whiny, needy, and clingy. Follows you around like a lost puppy. Tells you countless times how fine he thinks you are. Licks and bites his lip whenever he’s watching you. If you’re still not giving him the attention he’s craving, he’ll resort to kissing you on your lips, face, neck, chest, breasts—dry humping—LOOK, this big teddy bear just needs you. NOW!

Wooyoung:

Straightforward pt. 2. He would just straight up tell you that he wants you. How he wants you. Where he wants you. And when. But not before cooking your favorite meal for you. He’ll patiently wait until you’re done eating and tells you to take your time. Takes his time cleaning up afterwards. Takes his time walking you to the bedroom. Takes his time undressing you. Takes his time to touch every part inside of you. Even if you’re begging for him to go faster. Seriously, what’s the rush?!

Jongho

He’s shy about his feelings so he’s not telling you a single thang. But he would spend quality time with you. Just enjoys being in your presence and should he become physically affectionate, he’d touch your hand or cuddle to fulfill his needs.

[everyonewooeverywhere]

BACKSTAGE DRY HUMPING W/ HONGJOONG

pairing: hongjoong x female!reader

rating: 18+

content/warnings: female reader, sex toys, implied exhibitionism

notes: this isn't very long or good 💀 but i needed to get it out of my head and i didn't even try to edit it🧍‍♀️also this is in the same universe as behind closed doors~

NSFW 18+ | MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED

"Joong, you go on stage it fifteen minutes," you whisper at him as he hurries you down the hall.

"We'll be quick, baby. I promise," he pats your ass to move you forward, "I found an empty green room, so no one will bother us."

When you reach the unlabeled door, he opens it swiftly, pulling you in after him. And within seconds you’re on his lap on an old tattered couch in a green room that this venue clearly hasn't touched in months.

He groans when you roll your hips over the growing bulge in his jeans. “Fuck, baby. You look so good.” 

You let out a breathy moan when his lips latch onto your neck, shivering when his teeth nip at your skin. His hands wander to your ass, palming you over the little denim shorts. They were his favorites. The stars embroidered over your pockets made for perfect targets for him to slap discreetly when you hung around the band. Discreetly enough that your brother or his other bandmates wouldn’t notice.

He fumbled with the studded belt you wore around your waist with one hand, lips still attached to your neck. Flipping it open expertly before unbuttoning and unzipping the shorts with ease.

You choked on air when his finger brushed over you through your panties, “Joongie, please hurry we don’t have time.” And you nearly whimpered when he pressed his fingers against your clit.

“Oh baby, we’ve got plenty of time.”

“No we don’t,” he pulled his fingers out of your pants, smirking when you whined. He shifted around before pulling something out of his pocket.

Waving the toy in front of your face, he smiled at you, “I wanna try something a little different.” He pressed the little power button, loving how you ground your hips against his thigh when it started buzzing in his hand. You were getting all worked up already. He lowered his hand back into your pants, this time with the toy between his fingers. 

You forward into his chest when the vibrator slipped into your panties. “Oh god…” you breathed into his shirt. Groaning when he left it tight against your clit before zipping up your pants and re-buckling your belt. 

“Now…I can control this little thing with the remote in my pocket, okay?” The vibrations only made you grind on him harder, and he let you. Lifting his hips to meet yours. Letting the denim you both wore create friction between you. “You think you can wear it all night?”

A small whimper rose from the back of your throat.

He kissed your lips softly, “For me, baby? Can you do it for me?” He grabbed your ass again and rolled your hips against his crotch, causing you both to moan.

“Yeah,” you whined, “I think I can.”

He bit his lip, “Good girl.” 

You smiled at his praise.

“Wear it the rest of the night, and cheer for me real loud. Alright, baby?” He leaned in and pressed his lips to your ear. “And if you’re real loud,” he reaches into his pocket and turns up the vibrator to the max, “maybe everyone in that crowd will get to see how pretty you are when you cum.”

general taglist:  @swimmingkpopblog @oddracha @drinkingrumandcocacola @minaateez @funnyvxlentine 

@sunnysidesins @skzdust @princelingperfect @seomisaho @bigboymoozz

ateez taglist:  @certifiedmoa @wooyoungmybelovedhusband @curiousgworge @hyukssunflower @hotteokisms 

@sushiinmidnight @atiny-dime-p1ece @mismatchfluffysocks @vic0921 @vampzity 

@breadpuddingboys @woolysium @desirehorizon @im-ovulation @pommelex 

@dancingwithdeities @maidens-world @jycas @kirbrary @aftertherain-atr 

@staytinyinmybpack @m4n4-s4m4 @jjcanwrite @yvnhoos @uninterested-ghost 

@yizhou-time @shinyj3lly @kyeos4ng @prettygirlslietoo @miriamxsworld 

@tiny2018 @ttdogsworld @kejingken @fandom-freak-geek @painted-hills 

@minkioswoo @bkimrose @strawbshrtcks @dwcljh @linearities

[vcutparis]

good lord. rubs chest in consolation. good lord.

SO MANY FEELINGS SO MANY THOUGHTS. NO PERFECT STRUCTURE THEY'RE JUST INCOHERENT BABBLES. I WANT TO SPEAK OR I'LL COMBUST IN THIN AIR LIKE CONFETTI

i have no complaints with ending it's all part of the grand scheme BUT how i wish like joong, how i WISH he wouldve GOTTEN THOSE HUGS AND KISSES FOREVER. (there's always an evil eye in everyone's relationship AND BRO HOW I WISH TO GAUGE THAT EYE RIGHT NOW. (drops to knees and howls in pain) mingi...boy im sorry captain ate you up, why was he literally outside his bedroom GSHJNFNJKFM????? SIR GTFO

smh this was mingi, but from the description of his part i believe boy is going through his own grief and turmoil. so excused. MY JJONG BOY!!!! LITERALLY THE ANCHOR IN EVERY SCENE!!!!! BIG HUGS FOR MY GUY. best part? hongjoong's injury marks being scratches of desperation. idk i just like the thought behind it? it's certainly unique and a scar to actually hide(?) injuries full of desperation to live, the same ones his mother clawed the same arms for. absolutely loved how you described the change in each character's gazes. your utmoust detail to eyes warms me because UGHGFHF im a sucker for eyes. i LOVE LOVE LOVE IT. hwa giving the best advices to cap joong, oh i love my matz dynamic. never separate my matz when it's angst. genuinely ngl i was expecting much more cruel ending but thank YOU. TRINKETS FOR LOVED ONES???? BABY THAT'S THE BEST THING YOU CAN GIVE TO SOMEONE. my eyelashes were heavy with the tears. you explored joong's emotions well, enough to be atleast be justified in a reader's head. my heart really really melted when he couldnt even say sorry to her passed out self and proceeded to clean her tote bag....like that's the core essence of my joong 😭thats my joong 😭😭😭😭😭 oh god every moment felt so genuine i wanted to rip out my heart and give it to them. LIKE damn just take another heart and love each other more. this wasnt the normal case of stockholm syndrome and OH LORD OH LORD WHEN he begged and was in disbelief.....i

"anything you want. it's yours." jesus christ. i hyperventilated eyes rolled back almost ascended to heaven. IS THIS A MAFIA LEADER? OFFERING HIS PRESSED MARIGOLD FLOWER BOOKMARK? GRRRRRRRR THIS GRADUAL REDEMPTION ARC clawing my walls as i frantically heave, my snot and tears mixed running down my chin. all of thi probably wont make sense BUT I HAVE!!!! TO TALK!!!! looking for any glimpse us in the halls, like SIR THAT'S A CRUSH UR FEELING CMON my softie captain feeding chicken soup! changing our bandages! mama....i almost dressed up as a wedding pastor and wished to be teleported to that exact scene (too extreme nvm) im intrigued by the said man cheering on my beloved like that BUT mhm lets begin the game! THE LAST DINNER TOGETHER AND THE WALK AT NIGHT OH DUDE....I WILL ALWAYS EAT UP A QUIET WALK IN NATURE IN FANFICS LIKE FUCK CANDLELIGHT DINNERS, LET ME MERGE SOULS WITH MY BELOVED AMONGST NATURE AND MOON AS OUR SOLE WITNESS. The roughness of his palm contrasted sharply with the fragility of the charm as you placed it gently into his hand. His fingers curled around it instinctively, the same hand that once had only known destruction now cradling something so delicate with utmost care.

"good treat it with care" "you made it all right, joong."

i wish i could let this fic marinate in my head for a while but if i did i would burst out crying. GIVE ME MY BOY EVERYTHING!!!! FUCK WHOEVER THAT MAN IS DOING (he's doing something right maybe? but ZONT. ZONT PLEASE.)

01. The Captain — By Order of the Black Pirates

An 'Ice On My Teeth' Comeback Special Series

Pairing: gang leader!Hongjoong x fem!reader

AU: gang au

Word Count: 18.1k

Summary: The Captain of the Black Pirates—respected, feared, and unmatched in strategy—lives by his sharp mind and unshakable resolve. But his carefully constructed world begins to crumble when a grave mistake leads him to torture an innocent suspect nearly to death. Haunted by guilt, his quest for redemption takes an unexpected turn, awakening a part of him he never thought existed: a desire to protect and care for someone.

Genre: angst, hurt/comfort

Trigger Warnings: violence, torture, abuse, blood, scars, mentions of murder and SA, language, contains dark themes in general

SERIES MASTERLIST | ATEEZ MASTERLIST

The dim glow of lantern light flickered across the room as the gang leader held the letter between his fingers, turning it over with a scrutinising gaze. His brow arched slightly, the ivory wax seal bearing the unmistakable insignia of the White Serpents—a gang notorious for their cunning and deception, their pristine image masking venomous intent. Silent but deadly, serpents poised to strike. And Hongjoong knew them well.

"Well?" His voice was calm, almost amused, as he studied the coded message in his hand.

Yunho exhaled sharply with a shake of his head, frustration etched across his face. "She's stubborn. Won't admit to a thing. Twenty-four hours, and still nothing."

The Captain's smirk widened, dark amusement playing in his eyes. "Really? Even with this treacherous letter in her possession?" He tapped the envelope lightly. "Twenty-four hours… that's impressive. No dog has ever lasted that long." His tone was laced with mock intrigue. "Perhaps she's an especially loyal one. How interesting."

He leaned back, nodding toward the heavy iron doors leading to the basement, his voice low and confident. "A tough one to crack, no doubt. But they all crack… eventually." The distant echo of chains rattling and the creak of the doors opening sent a chill through the air. The game had only just begun.

Let's see just how long you can last.

The room was dim, suffocating in its silence, the air thick with tension and the metallic scent of damp stone. Your breath hitched as consciousness clawed its way back, and the cold, unforgiving chill bit at your drenched skin. You blinked through the sting of icy water clinging to your lashes, your trembling gaze rising to meet the source of the voice that shattered the oppressive stillness.

"Congratulations, miss!" The sudden, mocking boom made you flinch, fear coiling tighter around your chest. "You're the first to last a full day in these chambers. How very impressive!"

The man before you was smaller than the one who had been 'questioning' you earlier—a tall, lanky figure whose blows you could still feel—but this one's presence was far more terrifying. Cold authority radiated from him, his smile a twisted mockery of warmth. He stepped closer, his sharp eyes gleaming with dark amusement. "I trust my boys have treated you well."

A shiver tore through you, body wracked with uncontrollable tremors—whether from the bitter cold or the malice in his voice, you couldn't tell. His grin widened, and the false politeness only made it worse. "Fear not, my lady," he purred, his tone soft and deadly. "I'll treat you even better… until you decide to be honest, of course."

Your heart sank into the pit of your stomach, despair crashing over you. You tried to shake your head, but your body was too weak and cold to offer feeble resistance. And yet, you knew—this was only the beginning.

Squeezing your eyes shut, you wished for the thousandth—no, the millionth—time that this was all a nightmare. The cold seeped into your bones, but it wasn't just the chill that made you tremble. It was the gnawing fear, the hopelessness that clung to you like a second skin.

How did it come to this?

You replayed the events over and over in your mind, searching for an answer, but all you found was confusion. Just a day or two ago, you had been weaving through the bustling port, arms laden with imported goods for your employer. The crowded streets were alive with noise—merchants shouting, sailors hauling cargo, smugglers slipping through the shadows. You had only wanted to return to work, unaware that fate had already marked you.

Then it happened. A sharp turn into an alley. The sudden grip of rough hands. Black-clothed men cornering you like wolves circling their prey, eyes sharp and merciless. Their accusations—espionage, treachery—made no sense. You tried to explain, voice trembling, but they didn't listen. Not until they tore through your belongings and fished out a letter—one you had never seen before.

The blow came swiftly, a fist to your face, and the world went dark.

Now, here you were. Broken. Bleeding. Trapped in a nightmare you couldn't escape.

"P-please… I d-don't know who the Wh-white Serpents are," you stammered, forcing your swollen eye open to meet the man who seemed to command the room, his presence suffocating. "I s-swear…"

Hongjoong's tongue pressed against the inside of his cheek, his irritation barely concealed behind a mask of feigned calm. "You know," he said, his voice laced with a dangerous softness, "I was really hoping you wouldn't say that again." He exhaled in a mock sigh, his patience wearing thin. "Now you've left me no choice."

With deliberate steps, he moved toward the glowing embers at the far side of the room. The fire crackled, and your breath hitched when he wrapped his hand around a hot branding iron, its tip glowing ominously.

No, please...

Panic surged through you, and tears spilt uncontrollably down your cheeks. You didn't even have the strength to sob anymore. You could only watch in frozen terror as he turned back, the iron in his grasp radiating heat and menace.

"Come on," he cooed, voice deceptively gentle. "I'd really hate to ruin such pretty skin. All you have to do is be a good girl—tell me what this blasted letter says. Tell me the name of your boss." His grin was sharp, dangerous, but beneath it, you sensed his patience was threadbare.

The White Serpents. The name alone ignited his fury. Their faces were always hidden, their identities a mystery. Even their leader remained a ghost, a phantom in white. And that infuriated him more than anything—an enemy he couldn't see, couldn't predict.

And now, you were his only lead.

The room seemed to shrink under the weight of his frustration. The dim light flickered over the cold stone walls, shadows dancing like spectres of every soul that had suffered here before you. His grip on the branding iron tightened, the metal searing hot in his hand, glowing with menace. He didn't want to take this step—truly, he didn't. But the memory of how they found you replayed in his mind, solidifying his certainty.

You were guilty. You had to be.

He clenched his jaw, recalling the chaos at the port. The Black Pirates were in the midst of a crucial covert operation, tensions strung taut like a wire. They had been waiting for the White Serpents to make a move, for the elusive spy to slip through their defences. The streets were crowded, the perfect cover for deception.

Then there was you.

A simple girl, or so it seemed, navigating the busy market with unsuspecting ease. Unbeknownst to you, the real spy—the one they had been hunting—moved silently through the crowd. In a calculated move, the informant slipped the coded letter into your bag and vanished into the sea of bodies before anyone could catch him.

Hongjoong's men, sharp-eyed and vigilant, saw the handoff. They reacted swiftly, believing they had caught the elusive spy. You were cornered in the alley, fear etched across your face as you begged for understanding, your confusion only cementing their suspicions. The letter was damning enough. Evidence was evidence, and the Captain trusted his crew's intelligence.

But now, staring at you—broken, trembling, tears staining your bruised cheeks—he felt the edges of his certainty fraying. You persisted in your pleas, clinging to innocence with a desperation that should have crumbled by now. And yet… you hadn't.

"Last chance, woman," he said coldly, his voice like a blade drawn slowly from its sheath. The heat from the iron radiated, the threat palpable. "There will be no going back from here. I'm sure you know that."

He meant the words as a warning for you, a final offer before he left mercy behind. But deep down, perhaps they were a warning for himself, too—a foreshadowing he didn't yet grasp.

You shook your head weakly, trembling from exhaustion and terror. Still no confession. Still the same maddening persistence.

Hongjoong raised the branding iron, holding it close to your battered face. His eyes burned with something dangerous, something teetering between anger and frustration.

"Well then," he murmured, his voice low and dangerous, the finality in his tone sealing your fate—or so he thought.

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The air in the torture chamber hung heavy with the acrid stench of scorched flesh, mingling with the damp chill of the stone walls. His cold, calculating gaze never wavered as he watched you, unconscious and crumpled on the floor, your body trembling even in unconsciousness. The mark of the Black Pirates seared into your back, raw and angry, a testament to the brutality you'd endured.

"That'll scar for life," one of his men muttered, a mix of awe and amusement in his voice.

Hongjoong let out a low, humourless chuckle, his eyes dark with unrelenting resolve. "For life?" he echoed, tilting his head slightly. "How optimistic. I doubt she'll live long enough to see the next sunrise if she continues to be this stubborn."

His voice was void of emotion, laced with a chilling indifference that sent a shiver through even the most hardened of his men. He didn't enjoy this—not exactly—but he had no patience for weakness. If you wouldn't talk, you were nothing but a liability, and liabilities were dealt with swiftly.

He turned away for a moment, tossing the branding iron back into the fire with a careless flick of his wrist. Embers exploded in every direction, but he paid them no mind. "We've wasted enough time on her," he said, voice cold and final. "If she doesn't confess after this, end it. Finish her."

The room fell silent, save for the crackling of the fire, the finality of his words hanging in the air like a death sentence. One of the guards nodded, his expression stoic. "Of course, boss."

Hongjoong motioned toward the bucket of dirty water beside you, its murky surface rippling with the slightest movement. "Wake her," he commanded, his voice devoid of mercy, anticipating the agony that would soon follow.

The guard lifted the bucket with ease, the liquid sloshing dangerously close to the rim as he approached. Without hesitation, he tilted it, the filthy water cascading over your battered body. The moment the contaminated water hit your wounds, especially the fresh burn, your body convulsed violently.

A scream ripped from your throat, raw and guttural, piercing through the oppressive stillness. It wasn't the kind of scream that came from fear—it was the sound of pure, unfiltered agony.

The Captain didn't flinch. He stood tall, arms crossed, watching with a detached curiosity as you writhed on the floor. "That's better," he muttered, almost to himself. "Now, let's see if you're ready to talk."

He crouched down beside you, his face an unreadable mask. "Final chance," he said softly, almost tenderly, as if mocking your suffering. "Who sent you?" His voice dipped lower, dangerously calm. "Or would you prefer to die in this filth, unloved and forgotten?"

The only response was the ragged sound of your breath, broken sobs wracking your body. His patience was wearing thin, and though he was a man known for his control, he was ready to end this.

A shuddering breath escaped your lips, each gasp searing through your lungs like fire. The icy water clung to your battered body, every drop seeping into your open wounds, amplifying the unbearable pain. Your vision blurred, the dim room spinning into shadows and smoke, but you clung to the fragments of your thoughts, the last remnants of who you were.

This is it, you thought, the realisation settling over you with a strange, hollow calm. This is how it ends.

You didn't know why these monsters had dragged you into their nightmare, why they believed you were a spy. You didn't understand the cruel fate that had brought you here, only that it had. And now, there was no escape. The man before you, with his cold eyes and cruel smirk, had made that clear.

Your body trembled violently, not from the cold but from the acceptance creeping into your heart. Death will be a mercy, you thought. Better this than more agony.

Closing your eyes, you let the numbness wash over you, a strange kind of peace taking root beneath the layers of fear. You thought of your friends—the laughter shared over simple joys. You thought of your family, their faces blurred by memory but still holding warmth. And you thought of your employer, the one person who had seen worth in you when the world turned away. You prayed they would not grieve too long. You prayed they would find solace.

I'll watch over them, you promised silently. From wherever I'm going.

The wet, acrid air filled your lungs, heavy and suffocating. Every second stretched into eternity, and you waited for the final blow, the one that would release you. Your heartbeat slowed, the frantic rhythm giving way to a dull, distant echo.

And then, the room grew deathly quiet.

Hongjoong remained crouched, studying you, his iron grip on control unwavering. He didn't speak immediately, and that was almost worse. The silence pressed down, a suffocating weight, as if the world was holding its breath.

"Still nothing?" His voice was soft now, eerily gentle, like a predator savouring the last moments before the kill.

You didn't respond. Couldn't. There was nothing left to say. You were ready for the end.

And then, with a slow exhale, you heard him murmur almost to himself, "What a shame."

The gang leader let out a long, slow breath, his head shaking slightly, a humourless smile curving his lips. His eyes lingered on your broken form, slumped over, trembling and soaked, but utterly still, as if you had already crossed into death's grasp. Your eyes fluttered shut, the last spark of defiance extinguished. With a heavy sigh, he rose to his feet, dusting off his coat with deliberate care, and with a curt nod, gestured toward his men.

"Finish it."

The words were cold and final, slicing through the room like a blade. One of the guards stepped forward, the metallic click of his gun cocking echoing in the dim space, followed by the low scrape of his boot on the wet floor. Hongjoong turned his back on you, jaw tight, waiting for the shot to ring out, waiting for the moment to pass so he could move on from this wasted effort.

But then— footsteps. Quick and urgent, echoing down the stone stairway.

"Wait."

The voice was calm but firm, cutting through the tension like a sudden gust of wind. The room froze, the guard's finger hovering over the trigger as all eyes turned toward the stairs. Yeosang emerged from the shadows, his usual cool composure replaced by something unsettled. His sharp gaze darted toward your barely conscious form before locking onto his captain, his face unreadable, but his unease unmistakable.

Hongjoong's brow lifted in mild curiosity, though his patience was wearing thin. "What is it, Yeo?" he asked, voice clipped as the Phantom strode forward, his expression grave.

Yeosang leaned in close, his voice low but firm as he murmured something into the gang leader's ear, too quiet for the others to hear. Whatever he said, it landed like a blow. Hongjoong's entire posture shifted. His jaw clenched, his fists curling and uncurling at his sides as he processed the whispered words.

The room held its collective breath.

After what felt like an eternity, the Captain straightened, his eyes dark with a new kind of frustration, though there was no mistaking the glimmer of something else—regret? Anger? It was impossible to tell.

His voice, when it came, was sharp and decisive. "Release her."

The room erupted in a flurry of confusion, but no one dared question him. The guard with the gun hesitated for only a second before lowering it, stepping back. Another moved to untie the chains binding your wrists, the cold iron clattering to the floor as your limp body crumpled forward.

Hongjoong's gaze never wavered, his face carved from stone as he watched you collapse. His men obeyed without question, though their confusion was palpable, the tension still thick in the air.

As you slumped to the ground, barely conscious, he let out another breath, slow and controlled, his eyes narrowing in thought.

"Take her to the infirmary," he commanded, voice icy but steady. "And keep her alive."

His men exchanged uncertain glances but quickly moved to obey, lifting your frail body with care as they carried you out. He remained rooted, his eyes lingering on the bloodstained floor, his fists clenched once more as Yeosang watched him silently.

"I hope for your sake," Hongjoong muttered under his breath, "this wasn't a mistake."

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The heavy oak door to his office slammed shut behind him, the echo reverberating through the grand but cold space. Hongjoong paced across the dimly lit room, the fire in the hearth casting flickering shadows on the walls, but offering no warmth. His hand shook slightly as he poured another shot of whiskey, the amber liquid splashing over the rim. He didn't care. He downed it in one swift motion, the burn doing little to drown the bile rising in his throat.

Wrong person.

His brother's words replayed in his mind like a curse, each syllable a dagger to his pride.

"Hyung, we got the wrong person. She's not the spy—the real one escaped. This woman was just... there. A scapegoat."

He squeezed his eyes shut, his jaw clenched so tightly it ached. The whiskey glass slammed down on the desk, the sharp crack of glass against wood making his men just outside the door flinch. But none dared to enter. They knew better.

His fists balled at his sides, trembling with suppressed rage—at Yeosang, at his crew, at himself. The sight of your bloodied form flashed in his mind, the raw agony in your voice as he pressed the searing iron into your skin. He could still hear the echoes of your pleas, the desperate, broken words you had whispered over and over: I'm not who you think I am... please...

He should have known.

How could he have missed it? The way you had looked at him, not with defiance or guilt but with pure, unfiltered fear and confusion. He was Kim Hongjoong, the Captain of the Black fuckin' Pirates—his instincts had never failed him before. Yet this time, he had been blinded by rage, by the need for control, and it had led him to commit an unforgivable mistake.

His knuckles whitened as he gripped the edge of the desk, the polished surface groaning under the strain. No amount of wealth or power in this city could erase the image of your battered, broken body lying on the cold floor. The branded mark he had burned into your back would scar, not just on your skin but in his mind, forever.

The Black Pirates were ruthless, yes, but not reckless. Innocents were not meant to be collateral unless there was no other choice. This... this was different. It was unacceptable.

He let out a low, bitter laugh, hollow and laced with self-loathing. "How could this happen?" he muttered to no one, his voice cracking. "I'm the one who doesn't make mistakes."

But this was a mistake. A fatal one, if Yeosang hadn't intervened.

The storm inside him raged on, unrelenting. No amount of whiskey could drown it, no fire could warm the cold knot in his chest. For the first time in years, Kim Hongjoong felt something foreign and unwelcome searing through him.

Regret.

He sank into the leather chair behind his desk, elbows on his knees, head bowed. His hands covered his face, shaking as if he could scrub away the guilt, the shame. But it was branded on him now, just as deeply as the mark he had scorched into your skin.

After what felt like hours, he remained in his office, standing by the window, the golden light of the waning sun casting a sharp contrast against the deep shadows in the room. His gaze pierced through the glass, locking onto the tall, black gates of their mansion—gates that symbolised power, control, and security. Yet today, they felt like bars of a prison. He imagined how those gates must have looked to you, cold and foreboding, as you were dragged inside, far from the life you knew, thrust into a nightmare you hadn't earned.

He clenched his jaw, fists curling at his sides as the weight of his guilt continued to press down on him. One mistake. One mistake. That's all it had taken to bring you here. A mistake from his men, from him, and it had led to your torture. His throat tightened as those cruel memories clawed at him: your ragged pleas, your broken body, and worst of all, his voice—cold, detached, ruthless—demanding answers you didn't have.

Remorse surged through him, an agonising tide that refused to ebb. His own words echoed in his mind, venomous and unforgiving: "Be a good girl and tell us what this blasted letter says." His stomach twisted, the taste of bile bitter on his tongue.

He turned away from the window, squeezing his eyes shut as he clutched his head, fingers digging into his scalp as if the pain could drown out the memories. But it only intensified the haunting vision that consumed him: his mother's lifeless eyes, staring into nothingness, wide with fear and betrayal. She had died for nothing—used, discarded, and left to rot by men who saw her as collateral damage. All for debts that weren't hers to pay.

He had been just a boy—useless and powerless—as he watched her lifeblood seep into the dirt, all because of his degenerate father, who had left them behind with nothing but mountains of debt. The loan sharks had spared him, a mistake they didn't live to regret. Hongjoong had spent years rising from the ashes of that helpless child, becoming the monster who hunted monsters, the leader who swore to tear down anyone who preyed on the innocent.

Yet now, here he was, no different from the men who had taken his mother from him.

He slammed a fist onto the desk, the sharp crack splitting the heavy silence. His breathing was ragged, uneven, as his mind spiralled into the past. He had sworn not to harm the innocent.

But he had failed. He had repeated the very sin that had shaped him.

They weren't heroes. The Black Pirates were thieves, smugglers, outlaws. But they lived by one code: never harm those who didn't deserve it. They stole from the corrupt, the greedy, those who exploited the powerless. They were not saviours, but they were not supposed to be butchers either.

And now, because of his blindness, you lay broken and scarred—an innocent woman caught in the crossfire of his rage.

His hands trembled as he dragged them through his hair, staring blankly at the dark wood beneath him. His reflection in the glass across the room looked unfamiliar—haunted, lost, and consumed by a regret that would never fade.

How can I ever make this right?

The oppressive silence in the room was broken by a familiar deep voice, one he always sought when the weight of leadership became too much. "She's stable," Seonghwa said, his tone calm yet sombre.

Hongjoong exhaled a breath he hadn't realised he was holding, relief flooding through him like a tide that couldn't quite wash away the guilt. "Stable," he echoed, the word offering little solace.

His brother stepped closer, the soft creak of the floorboards the only sound between them. "They've patched her up... but I don't think some of the scars will ever go away." His voice dipped into something quieter, almost apologetic. "Especially not that mark."

The gang leader winced, his fingers tightening into trembling fists. The brand—his brand—seared into her back, a permanent testament to his cruelty. "The mark," he muttered, voice hoarse with regret. "She'll carry it because of me."

Seonghwa leaned against the edge of the desk, folding his arms, watching him with a measured gaze. "Because of us," he corrected, though the words offered no comfort. "But this isn't like you. You don't make mistakes like this."

Hongjoong let out a hollow, bitter laugh. "And yet, I did. I fucked up. She begged, Hwa." His voice cracked, raw and ragged. "She begged, and I didn't listen."

The eldest's face softened, but he didn't look away. "Regret is pointless if it doesn't drive change," he said quietly. "We can't undo what's been done. But maybe... maybe we can still make it right."

Hongjoong looked up, his eyes hollow but desperate. "How?"

Seonghwa met his gaze, steady and unwavering. "By giving her a choice. Her freedom. Protection if she wants it. You can't erase the scars, but you can make sure she's never harmed again."

The Captain's jaw clenched. "And if she wants nothing from us? If she wants nothing to do with the Black Pirates?"

"Then you let her go," Seonghwa replied simply, his voice steady. "With the assurance that she'll never have to fear us again."

Hongjoong leaned back in his chair, tension coiling in his shoulders. "I don't deserve forgiveness."

"No," the Gentleman agreed softly, his voice firm but kind. "But it's not about what you deserve. It's about what she does."

The words hung in the air, heavier than any weapon, cutting deeper than any blade.

Hongjoong dragged his hands through his hair, the tremor in them betraying the turmoil within. "Tell them to keep her comfortable," he whispered, voice barely audible. "And... let me know when she wakes up."

Seonghwa inclined his head, moving toward the door but paused before stepping out. "You may never forgive yourself, Joong," he said, his voice softer now, "but that doesn't mean you can't try to do better."

As the door clicked shut behind him, the leader was left alone with the echoes of his guilt—and the faintest, most fragile glimmer of hope.

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The quiet hum of the infirmary filled the air, broken only by the soft rustle of sheets and the faint crackle of the oil lamp on the bedside table. Hongjoong stood frozen in the doorway, his eyes locked on your still form lying on the cot. The sight twisted something deep inside him, the sharp pang of guilt slicing through him once again.

"Hyung?" Jongho's voice pulled him from his reverie, soft but laced with surprise. "Why are you here?" His brows knitted together in confusion as he stepped closer. "Seonghwa hyung said to only inform you when she's awake. She's not—"

The gang leader cut him off with a subtle shake of his head. "I had to see if she's okay... for myself." His voice was low, almost a whisper. "You're dismissed. I'll take over."

Jongho hesitated, his eyes searching his leader's face, filled with concern and something unspoken. "Hyung..."

"I won't..." Hongjoong's voice faltered, his throat tightening. "I won't hurt her any further, Jongho."

The youngest sighed softly, the tension in the room heavy between them. "That's not what I—"

"I know," Hongjoong interrupted, closing his eyes and swallowing hard. "It's fine. Just... go thank the doctor for me."

Jongho lingered for a moment, his gaze lingering on the Captain's worn expression. Finally, he gave a respectful bow of his head. "I'll be nearby if you need me."

With that, the Anchor left, the door clicking softly shut behind him, leaving Hongjoong alone with the stillness once more.

He stepped forward, the floor creaking beneath his boots, and sank into the chair beside the bed. His hands trembled as he clasped them together, resting them on his knees. He could barely bring himself to look at you, the bandages wrapped around your body stark against your pale skin, the ghost of the agony he had inflicted still lingering in the air.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, the words breaking like fragile glass. "Fuck, I'm so sorry."

The apology felt hollow, inadequate, but it was all he had. He sat there, staring at you, hoping that somehow, even in sleep, you might hear him. But the only response was the steady rise and fall of your chest, the rhythmic proof that you were alive.

Alive, but not whole.

He leaned back, his head tipping against the wall, the weight of everything crushing down on him. For the first time in years, Kim Hongjoong—the feared Captain of the Black Pirates—felt utterly powerless.

His eyes, unwilling to linger any longer on the bandages covering your wounded body, drifted downward. There, beneath the cot, something caught his attention. A crumpled, dirt-streaked tote bag sat neglected, its once vibrant fabric marred by careless fingerprints—his men's fingerprints.

He furrowed his brows and leaned forward, retrieving the bag with careful hands as if it might break apart at any moment. The stitching was amateur but charming, the drawings simple yet endearing. Scrawled in bright, cheerful lettering at the centre were the words Marigold Gift Shop.

It looked so out of place here in the dim and sterile infirmary, like a splash of sunlight drowning in shadow.

He set the bag on his lap and gently pried it open. The contents were jumbled, chaotic, but it was clear that everything inside once held meaning. Trinkets, small souvenirs from the port—a handful of seashells, a hand-painted keychain, and a delicate glass charm in the shape of a flower. These were not the belongings of a spy.

He reached deeper and pulled out a tiny notebook, its edges worn from use. His fingers brushed over the cover before flipping it open. The pages were filled with neat, dainty handwriting—simple lists:

Small wooden carvings

Candles (lavender & sea breeze)

Handmade bookmarks

Seashell jewellery

It wasn't just a list of purchases—it was a routine, mundane, innocent.

Hongjoong's throat constricted, and his hands trembled as the realisation struck him anew: you had been working. You had been on an errand for your job at the Marigold Gift Shop when they dragged you into their nightmare.

His vision blurred, his breath catching in his chest.

You had no idea who they were. No idea what danger you had stumbled into. You were just there, in the wrong place at the wrong time, and it cost you everything.

Hongjoong squeezed the notebook shut, resting it against his forehead as though it could somehow absolve him of the crushing guilt. People must be looking for you—your friends, your family, your employer. The ones who had sent you on this errand, trusting you would return safely.

And now, what could he give them? A broken, scarred version of the vibrant soul they had lost. How could he face them? How could he return you to them like this?

He sat in silence, the only sound in the room the steady rhythm of your breathing and the occasional drip of water from the infirmary's ceiling. His gaze lingered on the crumpled tote bag resting on his lap, its cheerful colours muted beneath the grime. His fingers traced the fabric absentmindedly before he noticed the bucket of clean water and a spare rag near your cot.

For reasons he didn't fully understand, he stood and reached for the rag, dipping it into the water. The cloth came away damp and cool, and he squeezed out the excess with slow, deliberate movements. It was a strange sight—Kim Hongjoong, feared leader of the Black Pirates, bent over a bag, carefully wiping away the dirt and grime.

He worked in silence, the world narrowing to this singular task. Each stroke of the rag against the fabric felt like an apology he couldn't utter aloud. Slowly, painstakingly, he cleaned the tote, rubbing away the stains until the bright colours began to peek through again. The cheerful drawings and stitched patterns reemerged, fragile yet resilient beneath the care of his steady hands.

Piece by piece, he began to arrange your belongings. The trinkets were cleaned and carefully set back in place—each seashell, the delicate glass flower charm, the hand-painted keychain. He smoothed out the tiny notebook, the pages no longer crumpled but straightened with the same precision he reserved for the most critical of plans.

As he worked, he felt a strange lightness settle over him. He hadn't noticed the small smile tugging at the corners of his lips until it faded, replaced by the weight of reality as his gaze shifted back to you.

The bag, now pristine, sat neatly on the table beside you, a quiet testament to his care—a care no one, not even his brothers, had seen in years.

He stood there for a long moment, staring at you, at the bandages wrapped around your broken body, and the regret clawed at his chest again. His smile had vanished entirely, replaced by the grim determination that only guilt could bring.

How could he make this right? How could he even begin? Would you ever be able to forgive him, or himself, for what he had done?

The questions lingered unanswered in the stillness as he sat back down, elbows on his knees, hands clasped tightly together.

He didn't know the answers. All he knew was that he had to try.

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The world swirled in an agonising haze as your consciousness began to claw its way back. Every inch of your body screamed in pain, each bruise, cut, and wound making itself known like fire crawling beneath your skin. It was almost impossible to grasp the full weight of the agony—how could anyone describe the sensation of pain this overwhelming? It was a deep, suffocating thing that made every breath feel like a battle.

You tried to open your eyes, but even that small movement was an assault on your senses. The brightness behind your eyelids was too much, the pressure of it sending a wave of dizziness crashing over you. When you managed to blink, your eyes watered uncontrollably, the effort alone nearly too much to bear. The burn on your back, the curse of that mark—his mark—lingered like a red-hot brand, the pain compounded by the memory of it being tainted with filthy, contaminated water. You couldn't even tell if the pain had dulled or if it was just the agony of everything else making it seem like the worst of it. Even if you didn't die from your injuries, you were certain that infection would claim you before long.

Slowly, with a whimper that barely escaped your cracked lips, you arched your back, instinctively trying to relieve the burning pain from the mark. The movement was weak, your body screaming in protest, but the sensation was a small reprieve. As you forced your eyes open again, blinking over and over to get your bearings, your vision began to sharpen, and the haze of confusion began to recede, bit by bit.

The white ceiling above you was a sharp contrast to the hellish basement you had been trapped in. A sterile smell filled the air, the kind that only came from a medical facility. You were no longer in that filthy, oppressive place. Were you safe now? Had someone rescued you? Was it the authorities? Or perhaps your friends, your family, or your employer had noticed you were missing and raised the alarm? Had they found you in time?

You desperately hoped for any answer that could bring you some sense of peace, but the sight before you shattered that hope in an instant.

Turning your head slightly, you froze. The tears that had started to retreat at the thought of safety now rushed back with full force. There, sitting in a chair beside your bed, was the man who had nearly ended your life.

His face was shadowed in exhaustion, his posture slumped slightly as if he'd nodded off in his seat. His presence hit you like a blow to the chest, a knot of raw fear twisting in your gut. The man who had tortured you, who had burned you, who had broken you was right there. The man who was responsible for every inch of pain you'd endured.

Your breath hitched in your throat, and despite your body's desperate need to remain still, the fear surged within you. You couldn't help but tremble, a silent cry of terror rising in your chest.

But even in your panic, something else stirred—a strange, foreign confusion. He was here. In this room. But he wasn't hurting you. Was he... watching over you? Was this some new kind of torment? A psychological game? The thought made your head spin.

Tears fell down your cheeks as you tried to shift, but your body refused to obey. You were broken in every sense of the word, and now, trapped by your own fear and pain, you couldn't make sense of anything. All you knew was that the man who had caused all of this—the man who had dragged you into this nightmare—was right there, inches away from you.

And you had no idea what it meant.

Your attempts to keep your sobs quiet failed, the soft, broken sounds escaping against your will. Each tremor in your chest seemed to echo in the sterile room, and despite the pain, your body recoiled in fear as you saw him stir. His brow furrowed, eyes fluttering open slowly, the grogginess of sleep fading as he registered the sound—and then, his gaze locked with yours.

Panic surged through you, your breath hitching violently as his dark eyes met your own, wide and trembling, your irises blown out with terror. You wanted to scream, to run, but your body betrayed you, too weak and broken to do anything but sink further into the thin blanket covering you. All you could do was shrink back, the ache in your body drowned out by the overwhelming fear coursing through your veins.

Hongjoong froze, his expression unreadable for a heartbeat. Then, he sat up straighter, slowly, deliberately, as if trying not to startle you further. His jaw clenched, and for a second, the silence stretched unbearably between you. He raised his hands carefully, palms facing you in a universal gesture of peace, his movements measured and cautious, like one might approach a wounded animal.

"Hey," he began softly, his voice low and careful, as though it might shatter you further. "It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you."

You didn't believe him. How could you? The fear in your eyes deepened, your body curling instinctively beneath the covers, though every movement brought fresh waves of agony. Your eyes darted around the room, seeking escape, seeking anyone else—but it was only him.

He sighed, a heavy sound filled with something that almost resembled regret. He stayed seated, keeping his hands up, as if showing he was unarmed would make any difference to the scars he had already left on you. "Nobody will hurt you again," he said, and his voice trembled, just barely. "That... that includes me."

You watched him, breath ragged, your body trembling with the effort to stay still. He swallowed hard, the guilt written in every line of his face as he continued, his tone thick with something you couldn't name—shame? Guilt? Desperation? "I know this is all very confusing, and you have no reason to trust me, but we made a mistake. I made a mistake."

He paused, his throat bobbing as he swallowed again, struggling with the weight of the words. "You're not who we thought you were. And for that—for everything we... I put you through—I'm sorry."

His apology hung in the air, but it did nothing to ease the terror in your heart. It sounded sincere, but sincerity didn't erase the pain, the scars, the nightmare that still lingered in your mind. It didn't change the fact that this man, who now sat before you looking so remorseful, had been the one to destroy you.

Tears continued to stream down your face, and all you could do was stare at him, disbelieving and broken, the word sorry echoing hollowly in your mind. He had taken everything from you, and now he expected that word to make it right?

The silence stretched between you, fragile and suffocating, as you lay there—shattered, terrified, and unsure of what came next.

As if your body had decided to break the unbearable silence itself, your stomach let out a loud, insistent growl. The sound was jarring in the stillness, so absurdly out of place that it caught both of you off guard. You gasped, clutching the thin blanket tighter to your face, cheeks burning despite the pain radiating through your body. Humiliation and fear clashed within you. Would he be disgusted? Would he regret sparing you? Was this the moment he'd change his mind?

You couldn't help but brace yourself.

But instead of anger or disdain, he simply blinked in surprise before his lips parted, and he mumbled softly, "Oh, right. Stupid me. You must be starving." His voice carried a gentleness that was almost foreign, as if the words were meant more for himself than you.

The wooden chair scraped lightly against the floor as he pushed it back, the sound startling in the quiet room. He stood slowly, the motion casual, almost hesitant. "I'll bring you something to eat," he said, the words so ordinary, so kind, that they felt unreal.

And then, just like that, he walked out of the room, the door closing quietly behind him.

You lay frozen, staring at the spot where he'd been moments ago, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Your mind spun in confusion, trying to reconcile the man who had tortured you with the one who now spoke softly and promised food. Was this some twisted game? Was he really going to bring you food—or was it laced with poison, a final, cruel trick?

But if he wanted you dead, why not just finish it when he had the chance? Why tend to your wounds, only to kill you later? The questions swirled relentlessly.

You bit your trembling lip, tears pricking the corners of your eyes again. He could have killed you. You had seen it in his eyes that day—the moment he gave the final order. You had accepted it then, surrendering to fate, your body succumbing to the darkness.

Yet here you were. Alive.

Still shaking, you turned your head to the door, trying to comprehend the reality before you. Was this real? Was he truly changing—or was this a prelude to something worse?

The confusion and fear gnawed at you, but beneath it, a glimmer of something unfamiliar lingered.

Hope.

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"Here," he said softly, holding out a spoonful of chicken soup to your lips. The aroma was heavenly—rich and savoury, exactly what your starved body craved after days without food. Your stomach clenched painfully in response, desperate for sustenance. Yet, despite the temptation, you frowned and turned your face away.

He sighed, his hand lowering slightly but not withdrawing entirely. The bowl in his other hand trembled ever so slightly as if he wasn't sure what to do next. Finally, he set it gently on the table beside you, the warm liquid inside rippling quietly.

Eyes trailing after his movements, you caught sight of your bag resting there. It wasn't in the state you remembered—no longer a crumpled, filthy mess. It had been cleaned meticulously, every stitch visible and tidy, the fabric now free from dirt and grime.

His voice interrupted your thoughts, soft and almost hesitant. "Oh yeah, your bag. I... got busy while you were sleeping and cleaned it up."

You clutched the blanket tighter, sceptical. Him? Cleaning your bag? It was absurd.

"Everything inside too," he added, a small smile pulling at his lips. "You have some pretty cool stuff."

Your eyes widened, heart racing. He touched your things? Against your better judgement, you reached out, wanting to verify the state of your belongings, only to let out a sharp cry as pain flared through your body with the movement.

He was beside you instantly, his hands hovering, unsure whether to touch or retreat. His face twisted in something that looked suspiciously like hurt when you recoiled, sinking back into the bed to avoid him.

Clearing his throat, he asked, voice soft, "You want your bag?"

You nodded timidly, watching him closely. His small smile returned, gentle and relieved. "Let me help you," he murmured, pulling his chair closer. He placed the bag on the bed between you both, unzipping it carefully for you to see inside.

For the first time since waking up, your eyes softened. Everything was as he said—clean, neatly arranged. Trembling fingers reached out for the glass flower charm nestled inside, your favourite trinket. But before you could touch it, your stomach betrayed you again with a loud, desperate growl.

Humiliated, you drew your hand back, shrinking into yourself.

He chuckled softly, reaching for the bowl again. "I know you don't trust me, and you shouldn't," he admitted, his tone gentle and sincere, "but I can assure you, this is safe to consume." To prove it, he scooped a generous spoonful and took a bite himself, letting out an exaggerated hum of satisfaction.

You swallowed hard, the sight and smell tormenting you. Still, you hesitated when he held out another spoonful.

"If you won't eat it," he said with a sigh, "then I'll finish the rest." He raised the spoon toward his own mouth as if to follow through.

Before he could, you opened your mouth quickly, and his grin softened. Gently, he fed you, the warm broth sliding down your throat like liquid gold, soothing and comforting. The flavours were simple, yet after days of deprivation, it felt like the most luxurious meal you'd ever had.

He remained calm, every action slow and deliberate, offering care despite your fear and mistrust. His patience was unsettling, yet... somehow, in that moment, the terrifying man you had known felt like a distant memory.

But the pain in your body lingered. And so did the scars.

Hongjoong felt a warmth he couldn't explain swelling in his chest as you finished the final spoonful, the empty bowl resting between you both like a fragile truce. His eyes softened as he watched you, vulnerable yet still defiant, the faintest remnants of tears glistening on your lashes. He reached forward, hand poised to wipe the corner of your lips, but before he could, a sharp knock on the door shattered the moment.

He blinked, and it was as if a mask fell into place. The softness in his gaze vanished, replaced by the cold, commanding demeanour you knew too well. He set the bowl on the table, the clink of ceramic against wood too loud in the heavy silence. Straightening in his seat, shoulders squared, he uttered a firm, "Come in."

You shrank back into the bed instinctively, your body curling as far from him as your injuries would allow. The door creaked open, and another man stepped inside—his brow raising slightly when he noticed you were awake.

"Hyung," he said, his tone both respectful and urgent, "you're needed at the meeting. To discuss our next steps, now that the..." He hesitated, casting a brief glance your way, as if unsure how much to say in your presence. "The actual spy remains at large."

Hongjoong nodded, the authority in his posture unwavering. "I'll be there. Thank you, Jongho." His voice was clipped, businesslike, a stark contrast to the gentle tone he'd used with you only moments before. "Summon the doctor. Have her checked thoroughly and ensure she's comfortable."

The man named Jongho gave a short nod and left without another word, the door clicking shut behind him.

For a moment, the Captain remained seated, his back straight, tension radiating from him. Then, as if reminded of your presence, he turned to you once more. His expression softened, just for a second, as he offered the faintest smile—fleeting but genuine. "It's okay," he murmured, his voice so low it was almost a whisper. "No one will hurt you again. I won't let them."

Before you could react, the smile vanished, his face hardening once more as he rose to his feet. Without another glance, he strode to the door and exited, the soft thud of his boots fading into the distance.

You lay there, staring at the closed door, heart racing, mind spinning. The man who had nearly destroyed you had just promised your protection. And despite everything, a single, terrifying thought whispered through your mind:

I believe you.

The room felt unnervingly quiet after his departure, the air still heavy with the remnants of his presence. You stayed frozen for a moment, listening to the silence, your pulse still thundering in your ears. Slowly, cautiously, you shifted beneath the blanket, every movement sending fresh waves of pain rippling through your battered body.

But you endured it, your gaze locked on the bag resting beside you. Trembling fingers reached out, brushing against its fabric, now pristine compared to how you last remembered it—torn, dirtied, ruined. Carefully, you pulled it closer, clutching it to your chest like a lifeline, tears welling up as you stroked the surface. Your fingers traced over the familiar stitches and doodles, remnants of happier times, of days spent working, laughing, living.

Were your loved ones searching for you? How frantic must they be, wondering if you were still alive, hoping, praying for your return? The thought broke something inside you, and you wept silently, the tears streaming down your face as you reached inside the bag.

Piece by piece, your belongings greeted you, neatly arranged—your keychain, your tiny souvenirs, even the little trinkets you'd collected on that ill-fated day. None of them bore the grime and cruelty you had last seen, each one painstakingly cleaned, cared for. Despite yourself, a hollow sob escaped your lips, and you hated how much it affected you.

At the very bottom of the bag, your trembling hand closed around the familiar worn edges of your notebook. You pulled it out, your tears falling freely as you held it close, opening the cover with a sniffle. Flipping through the pages, you found the list you had written, the innocent to-do list that had led you into this nightmare. Your thumb traced the ink of your handwriting—dotted with tiny stars and hearts—and you almost smiled through the pain.

But it wasn't your handwriting on the newest page. You froze, blinking through your tears as you stared at the words, scrawled in a neat, unfamiliar script:

I'm sorry. I will make it right again, I promise.

Your breath caught in your throat, a sob escaping that you couldn't suppress. He had written it. The very man who had branded you, broken you. And yet here, in this quiet, fragile moment, his apology was inked into your most personal possession.

It wasn't enough. It could never be enough.

But it was something.

The notebook fell from your hands, landing on your lap as you curled around it, weeping not just from pain, but from the deep, agonising confusion that tangled with it. You didn't know what to feel anymore. Hatred? Grief? Or some terrible, unbidden hope that his words weren't just lies?

As the tears blurred your vision, you whispered brokenly to no one, "Why does it hurt more now?"

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The days stretched into a haze of silence and uncertainty. You hadn't seen him since that moment when he fed you soup and scribbled his apology into your notebook. In his absence, Jongho became a constant presence—a quiet sentinel, always bringing what you needed but never lingering too long. Aside from him, the kind doctor, with her gentle hands and soothing voice, tended to your wounds, her care meticulous and soft. But it was always just Jongho and her. Never the Captain.

At first, you felt like a prisoner, wondering what the end of this strange hospitality would bring. Would they let you go? Was this kindness a façade before some darker fate awaited? But as the days went on, your thoughts turned inward, your hands finding comfort in writing. You filled parchment after parchment with letters—letters to your parents, your best friend, your employer. They were full of reassurances you weren't even sure you believed. I'm alive. I'm safe. I will come back. But the ink soothed you, even if you knew they might never be sent.

Today was no different, except for the soft murmurs between you and the doctor as she changed your dressings. Her hands worked deftly, the cool air brushing against your skin as she peeled away the layers of gauze and replaced them with fresh, clean bandages. You let your mind drift, thinking of the promise he had scrawled in your notebook. He said he'd make it right. But how? Will I get to leave? Will I ever see my old life again? And if I do… will I ever be the same?

The faint creak of the door interrupted your thoughts, and you looked up instinctively, expecting Jongho's usual unhurried entrance. But it wasn't the Anchor.

It was him.

Your breath caught, and you froze, eyes wide as you met the gaze of Kim Hongjoong. He, too, stilled in the doorway, his expression unreadable, but his eyes betrayed a flicker of something—guilt, perhaps? Regret? His gaze fell to your back, to the horrid brand etched into your skin, and you saw the way he flinched.

He wasn't the only one.

Your body trembled involuntarily, an instinctive recoil from the man who had caused you so much pain. The doctor, blissfully unaware of the tension thickening the air, glanced up with a warm smile. "Oh, you're here! I'm almost done, just give me a minute."

The gang leader nodded stiffly, but he didn't speak. He quickly averted his gaze, turning away as if the sight of you was unbearable. Perhaps it was. Perhaps it should be.

But not for the same reasons as before.

You watched him from the corner of your eye, clutching the edge of the blanket as the doctor finished her work, her hands light on your skin. She hummed softly, her presence a soothing balm to your raw nerves. But your focus remained on him—on the way his shoulders tensed, on the way he refused to meet your eyes again. When he did chance a glance, he caught your gaze, and you saw it clearly: shame.

His lips parted, but no words came. You wanted to demand answers. Why are you here? What do you want from me? But your voice remained trapped in your throat.

The doctor stood, packing up her supplies with a satisfied smile. "There we are," she said brightly, glancing between the two of you. "I'll leave you to rest now." She nodded respectfully to Hongjoong before quietly excusing herself, leaving you alone with him.

The door clicked shut, and the silence between you thickened. You stared at him, your heart pounding, as he stood there, still and unsure. He finally spoke, his voice low and rough, as if it hurt to say the words.

"I didn't mean to... interrupt." He looked down, hands clenched at his sides. "I only came to see how you were."

You didn't know what to say. Under normal circumstances, perhaps a thank you would have been appropriate—but this wasn't normal, and he didn't deserve that. So you kept quiet, your lips pressed into a thin line, your hands fidgeting with the edge of the blanket.

He sighed softly, the sound barely audible, before clearing his throat and moving to sit beside you, just as he had that day with the soup. He settled into the chair with a quiet grace, attempting a small, hesitant smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. His gaze flickered to the books, papers, and pens scattered across the nursing table beside your bed.

"I hope Jongho managed to get you everything you asked for," he said gently, his voice low and careful, as if afraid to startle you. You nodded, but kept your eyes downcast, focused on your wringing hands.

His gaze followed yours, landing on the letters you had written—the stack of parchment covered in your careful handwriting. For a moment, you tensed, waiting for the inevitable backlash. Would he order his men to burn them? Would he scold you for daring to think of leaving, for daring to hope?

But instead, his voice was soft. "Would you like me to deliver them?"

You froze, lifting your head slowly, your wide, disbelieving eyes meeting his earnest gaze. He gestured toward the letters with a slight movement of his hand. "The letters," he clarified. "I could send them for you."

Your disbelief must have shown on your face, the way your brow furrowed and your lips parted slightly in shock. He saw it. He felt it. And it cut deeper than he expected. Of course, you still saw him as a monster. Why wouldn't you? He had given you every reason to believe that. If he wanted to change that, he would need to do more—much more.

He closed his eyes for a moment, steadying himself, before looking at you again with an expression that was raw and unguarded. "Look," he began, voice heavy with something that felt dangerously close to regret. "You're not trapped here, in case you're wondering. You're free to leave whenever you want."

You blinked, your heart racing at the words. Could you believe him? Could you trust that freedom was within your reach?

"It's just that…" He trailed off, searching for the right words. "After everything we—I've done to you, the least I can do is help you heal. To nurse you back to health, to give you what you need. I need to make it right. That's all I want. For you to get better, to return to yourself. And if there's anything you need to make that happen… just say the word."

His voice dropped to an almost pleading tone. "So tell me—do you want those letters delivered? Is that it?"

You stared at him, searching his face for any trace of deception, any hint of insincerity. But all you saw was honesty. Whether or not it was real, you didn't know. But the sincerity in his tone, the earnestness in his eyes—it was undeniable.

And you couldn't lie to yourself. The letters were what you wanted. To set your mind and heart at ease. To reassure your loved ones that you were still alive, still here, even if only barely.

So you nodded.

He exhaled slowly, as if relieved, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you saw a glimmer of something softer in his expression. "Okay," he said simply. "I'll make sure they're delivered."

You struggled, the words stuck in your throat like stubborn stones, not fear this time—but something else. Something unfamiliar and unsettling. You nodded again, the gesture small and hesitant, and to your surprise, he seemed to find it… endearing. His smile softened further, and though you wanted to resent him for it, there was something disarming about the warmth in his expression.

Noticing the way you hesitated, as if wanting to speak but unsure how, he shifted in his chair, intertwining his fingers and leaning forward, careful in his every movement. He stopped just short of your space, close enough to offer comfort but far enough to avoid overwhelming you. His eyes, soft and patient, held yours, and the corners of his lips tugged upward in that same gentle smile—a silent reassurance: I won't hurt you. It's okay.

He seemed aware of how much he was smiling, almost as if surprised by it himself. His eyes glimmered with something that felt out of place in a man like him—genuine kindness. It struck you then, how foreign that smile must have been on his face, as if it had gone unused for too long. You wondered who he had once been, before this life of cruelty hardened him. And you hated that part of you, the part desperate for softness, wanted to know.

"It's alright," he said softly, his voice gentle and warm. "You don't have to be afraid. Just tell me—what do you want?"

The tenderness in his tone felt unreal. This was the same man who had once stood over you, cold and unyielding, ready to snuff out your life. And yet here he was now, speaking to you as if you were fragile, precious even. It was maddening. Confusing. And yet, damn you for being nothing more than a frail human aching for kindness, your guard cracked, just a little.

You didn't know why you asked it, why this question had been sitting in the back of your mind, waiting for its chance to escape. But when you finally spoke, your voice was soft, barely above a whisper, trembling with vulnerability. "Your name."

He blinked, caught off guard. For a moment, silence stretched between you, his expression shifting from surprise to something softer, almost regretful. And then, in that quiet space, he realised the truth: from the very beginning, through everything he had put you through, he had never once told you his name.

He sat back slightly, exhaling a breath he hadn't realised he was holding. "Hongjoong," he said, his voice steady but tender, as if offering you something sacred. "My name is Hongjoong."

Your lips parted, and though you had imagined feeling hatred for this name, it didn't come. Instead, all you felt was the raw ache of everything left unsaid.

"Hongjoong," you repeated, tasting the name on your tongue like a fragile thing, and the way you said it felt like the start of something neither of you could yet name.

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Hongjoong had made it a point to visit you every evening, just before the world outside your room fell silent for the night. At first, you dreaded those moments, unsure of his intentions or what he might say. But as the days turned into weeks, those visits became routine. He would sit beside your bed or across from you at the small table, his demeanour always calm, his tone soft and steady, and slowly, piece by piece, he unravelled the mystery of who he was, what this place meant, and how you had been drawn into their world.

His name, you learned, was more than just a name. He was the leader of this place, a sprawling mansion that served as the heart of a powerful syndicate—a gang, as you quickly realised. The people here, the ones who moved with deadly precision and cold efficiency, were his crew. Not just criminals, but men who had pledged their loyalty to him and each other in the face of a world that sought to destroy them.

You had been caught in the crossfire of a feud between two factions, mistaken for an enemy spy in a moment of chaos. It explained the brutality with which you had been treated, the mistrust that lingered until the truth emerged too late. "You weren't supposed to be hurt," he told you one night, voice thick with regret. "I didn't know who you were. If I had known..." He never finished those sentences, leaving the unsaid to hang in the air like a bitter aftertaste.

And now, the pieces fit. The puzzle you had struggled to solve finally made sense, but with that clarity came an unsettling reality: you were surrounded by criminals. Even if Hongjoong had promised safety, you were in a den of people capable of murder, of violence, of unspeakable acts committed in the name of survival and loyalty. It went against everything you believed in—your sense of morality, the honest life you had led until now.

Yet, despite your fear and discomfort, you knew you had no choice. What had happened could not be undone. The only hope you clung to was for a swift recovery, a chance to leave this world behind and return to the life you had once known.

As your injuries healed, you grew stronger. The sharp, constant pain dulled to a distant ache, and with the doctor's meticulous care, you were soon able to move around. Hongjoong had a proper room prepared for you—one more fitting, spacious, with large windows that let in the light. It was more comfortable than you dared to expect, but you knew better than to interpret it as anything more than a gesture of atonement.

Still, you couldn't deny the strange, unspoken connection that had formed between you and him. You wouldn't call it friendship—you couldn't. He was still the man who had brought you to the brink of death. But there was something. Something fragile, a bond woven through shared guilt and reluctant trust. You found yourself relying on him in ways that shamed you. You hated it, hated how you felt a strange sense of calm when he was near, as if the very person responsible for your suffering was now the anchor keeping you steady.

It was complicated. Confusing. And worst of all, it made you question whether the lines you thought were so clear—between captor and captive, between right and wrong—had begun to blur.

Unbeknownst to you, Hongjoong wrestled with the same confusion—especially about the emotions that had begun to surface lately. He couldn't shake the persistent need to be near you. It gnawed at him like an unrelenting tide, wearing away the walls he had built over the years. He told himself it was duty, responsibility. After all, he was the reason you had nearly lost your life. If he hadn't acted so quickly on false information, none of this would have happened. He reasoned that it was only right to take full responsibility, to ensure your recovery—physically and otherwise.

That logic gave him something to hold on to, but it didn't explain everything. It didn't explain why his eyes instinctively sought you out whenever he walked the halls or the strange calm that washed over him when he saw you safe. It didn't explain the warmth that bloomed in his chest when he heard your voice or glimpsed your rare, hesitant smiles. No, it wasn't just responsibility anymore. It was something deeper, something he wasn't ready to name.

After another gruelling meeting filled with discussions of crisis management and strategies to track down the elusive spy, the Captain's head buzzed with tension. His face remained a mask of cold authority, his steps measured, his shoulders squared. He passed his men without sparing a glance, his thoughts elsewhere. Always on you. The dining hall was empty, your room vacant, and the painting room—where you often sat doodling, lost in thought—was deserted. A strange, unwelcome worry tightened in his chest.

Relief only came when he pushed open the heavy library doors and saw you standing there. You stood in a sunlit aisle, the golden light streaming through the tall windows, bathing you in a soft glow. The light illuminated your features—now mostly healed, the bruises reduced to faint shadows, the cuts mere whispers of what they had been. You were beautiful, he realised, and the realisation ached in a way he hadn't anticipated. He closed the door quietly behind him, the sound muted, careful not to startle you. His steps were slow and deliberate as he approached, his heart inexplicably racing.

You were focused on a pressed flower bookmark tucked between the pages of a book, your head tilted slightly as you admired it, your fingers gently brushing the fragile petals. The scene was simple, ordinary. Yet it stirred something in him, an unspoken truth he wasn't ready to confront.

"Marigold," he said softly, his voice low to not disturb the tranquillity. "That's my favourite flower."

You looked up, startled at first, but your expression softened when you saw him. "Really? It's mine too," you replied, your voice steady, though a hint of curiosity lingered in your tone.

A small smile tugged at his lips, softer than usual, though it carried the weight of everything left unsaid. "It is? Then you should keep it," he said, nodding toward the bookmark, surprising even himself with the offer.

"But—" you began, gesturing toward the marked page.

He chuckled quietly, shaking his head. "I never had time to finish the book anyway. Can't even remember what it's about. Just take it. It's yours now."

Anything you want, it's yours.

For a moment, the silence between you stretched, fragile yet profound, like a delicate thread holding more than either of you dared admit. Hongjoong didn't know what this feeling was, only that it was growing. And being near you eased a part of him he hadn't realised was broken.

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The evening air was still, and the faint glow of the lamp in your room cast a soft halo beneath the door, a beacon that drew him to check on you one last time before retiring. He knocked gently, expecting the usual soft response or even a brief acknowledgement, but there was only silence. His brows knitted in concern, and he knocked again, the sound a little firmer this time. Still, no answer.

Then he heard it—a muffled yelp.

Panic surged through him. He couldn't wait. "I'm coming in," he called, his voice urgent but not harsh, and without hesitation, he pushed open the door.

The sight that met him stopped him in his tracks. You were sitting on the edge of your bed, your shirt halfway unbuttoned, exposing your shoulder and part of your back. The fresh bandage you had been attempting to wrap around yourself lay unravelled on the floor, a tangle of gauze mocking your efforts. Your face was flushed with embarrassment, and the moment you realised he was there, you scrambled to pull your shirt back up, your movements frantic and clumsy.

He didn't look away, not out of disrespect, but because he couldn't ignore the mark on your back. That cursed brand. Every time he saw it, it felt like a punch to the gut, a cruel reminder of his failure. If he could change one thing in his life, it would be that—undoing the moment that left such a permanent scar on you. He swallowed hard, his throat tight, before finally speaking, his voice softer than you'd ever heard it.

"Do you need help?"

Your immediate response was a firm shake of your head. "I'm fine," you insisted, though the tremble in your voice betrayed you. He could see it all: the mess of your hair, the exhaustion etched into your face, the slight tremor in your hands. You had been at this for a while, stubbornly trying to do it alone, and it was clear that you were anything but fine.

Hongjoong sighed quietly, stepping closer, each movement deliberate and gentle, as if afraid he might scare you away. "You're not," he said softly, without accusation, without pity, only quiet understanding. He knelt in front of you, eyes level with yours, and held out his hand, palm up, an unspoken offer. "Let me help."

You hesitated, biting your lip, your pride warring with the exhaustion. But eventually, you let out a shaky breath and nodded, your eyes downcast. He reached for the discarded bandage on the floor, his movements slow, deliberate, as if trying not to disturb the fragile air between you.

Carefully, he unbuttoned your shirt just enough to reveal your shoulder, his fingers never straying more than necessary. The moment felt intimate but not in the way that made you feel vulnerable. It was gentle. Respectful. As he wrapped the bandage around you with practised precision, his hands were steady, careful not to brush against your skin more than needed.

"You don't have to do everything alone," he murmured as he fastened the bandage, his voice like a balm. "I know you're strong, but you can let someone help you."

You didn't respond immediately, the warmth of his words sinking in as you sat in silence. Finally, you whispered, "Thank you."

He gave a faint smile, one you didn't see but could hear in the softness of his voice. "Anytime."

You finally turned to face him, your breath catching when you realised just how close he was. His face, so much softer now than the man who had once been your captor, was mere inches away. As if more modest than you, he quickly moved to help button your shirt, his fingers deft but gentle, avoiding your gaze as if giving you privacy in a moment that was anything but private. Your eyes, however, couldn't stop following the sincerity etched into his expression, hating the way it made your heart race. How could your body betray you like this, reacting to someone who had once been so cruel?

You swallowed hard, trying to banish those thoughts, and lowered your gaze. That's when you noticed his wrist peeking from the rolled-up sleeve of his shirt. It was the first time you saw them, the scars that twisted from his elbows to his wrists like angry, jagged reminders. Your brows furrowed, curiosity—and something deeper—propelling you forward. Without thinking, your hand reached out and grasped his as he pulled away, holding it gently.

"H-how'd you get these?" your voice trembled, more from the vulnerability in the air than any fear.

Hongjoong stilled. The small smile on his face faded, replaced by a haunting stillness. He pulled his hands back gently, as if realising for the first time he had no right to be near you, no right to touch you. He placed your hands carefully back in your lap, almost reverently, and turned toward the window, the fading sunlight casting shadows across his face.

A humourless chuckle escaped him, low and bitter, as he glanced at the scars on his arms before shifting his gaze to the darkened horizon. "Let me tell you the story of a boy," he began, his voice void of emotion but heavy with pain, "who had everything taken from him. Not that he had much to begin with—only a mother who loved him more than anything." His voice cracked, almost imperceptibly, but you caught it. "Even that wasn't enough for fate."

He didn't look at you, eyes fixed on the darkening sky, as if it held all the answers. "My father was a worthless drunk with a gambling problem. He left us with nothing but debts, and my mother… she worked herself to the bone, trying to keep us afloat. But it was never enough. The loan sharks came one night." His hands clenched into fists at his sides. "I was too young to understand what they wanted, why they were shouting at her. But I remember… I remember watching them beat her to the ground."

His voice dropped to a whisper, but it cut like a blade. "I watched them strip her, violate her, and when they were done, they slit her throat as if she were nothing." He exhaled shakily, his jaw tightening. "They left me there with her body. Taunted me. If they had known what they created that night… maybe they wouldn't have left me alive."

You sat motionless, your heart aching at the raw truth of his confession. Suddenly, everything made sense—how he had become this way, hardened and cold. You could understand now, even though it hurt to. Perhaps you would have become the same if you had endured such horrors. No one is born evil. We are all blank canvases, shaped by what we experience, by the pain life forces us to endure.

His eyes fell to the scars on his arms, and a bitter smile tugged at his lips. "These," he murmured, flexing his fingers as if feeling the memory burn anew, "are souvenirs from that night." His voice grew colder, distant, as if reliving the moment. "I remember their nails clawing at my arms, desperate to cling to life. But it didn't matter. Those bastards were never going to escape."

Despite the chilling edge in his words, you felt no fear. Instead, you saw the boy hidden beneath the armour, a boy the world had broken too soon. He turned back to you, his eyes no longer cold but filled with a deep, aching regret. "And that's why," he said, voice trembling with emotion, "I wish I could undo what I did to you. I swore I'd never harm the innocent, never become what they were. But I failed." His voice cracked. "I'm sorry. God, I'm so sorry. Nothing I do will ever make this right."

To his surprise, you reached out, your hand resting gently on his shoulder, offering comfort where he expected none. He turned to you, his eyes glistening with tears he refused to let fall.

"It's okay, Hongjoong," you said softly, your voice unwavering yet gentle. "Everyone makes mistakes."

And then you smiled—a small, genuine smile, brimming with forgiveness. It shattered something within him, but it also healed something far deeper, a part of him he thought was long dead.

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Things had shifted significantly between you since that fateful night when he first bared his soul, revealing the shadows of his dark past. Your understanding unlocked something in him, and in turn, you also began to open up. Little by little, you spoke more, smiled more freely, and allowed yourself to be vulnerable in his presence. Hongjoong, too, had changed. What once were brief visits to check on you became shared meals, quiet conversations, and the gentle ritual of him changing your wound dressings daily. It had become a routine—a comforting rhythm filled with tender moments, lingering touches, deep gazes, and countless almosts.

Almost kisses. Almost confessions. Almost something more.

Just a little longer, he told himself, fighting the constant urge to feel your lips against his. He needed to earn your trust fully before daring to take that step. He knew he didn't deserve you—but the heart wants what it wants.

But of course, just as he allowed himself to believe things were finally settling, reality reminded him otherwise. He should have known better than to think peace could last in his world. You and he had grown closer, but the life he led was never one to offer tranquillity for long. Conflict loomed on the horizon. An important meeting was fast approaching—a meeting arranged long before you had entered his life.

The Black Pirates, an organisation that had always operated with an exclusively male force, had struck a delicate negotiation with the Red Room, a renowned spy training facility specialised in producing elite female operatives. Though both syndicates had thrived independently, they saw mutual benefit in an alliance, especially as the shadowy threat of the White Serpents continued to grow. A treaty was in the works and was supposed to be one of Hongjoong's top priorities.

Yet, things had changed. You were here now, and part of him refused to leave you. The thought of being away, of leaving you vulnerable even for a moment, gnawed at him. So he made a decision: Seonghwa would attend the meeting in his place. The eldest, the Gentleman, was their best negotiator, and if anyone could secure a favourable outcome, it was him.

"It's set then," he said, his tone final. "Seonghwa will represent me for this." He leaned back slightly, eager to conclude the meeting and return to you.

But he should have known better than to expect it would be accepted without protest.

The moment the words left his mouth, Mingi's hand slammed onto the table, the force reverberating through the room. "Really, hyung?" he spat, his voice heavy with frustration. "You're going to send someone else on your behalf for something this important? I was already fed up with this nonsense, but enough is enough!"

The screech of the temperamental member's chair echoed as he shoved it back, rising to his feet, the fire in his eyes blazing. Yunho reached out, gripping his arm in warning, but Mingi shook him off, his glare fixed on their leader.

"No!" he growled, his voice rising. "When will this madness stop?! I'm sick and tired of you being distracted by her. At first, I understood—you felt guilty, like you owed her something. But now? You're letting it go too far! You've been wasting precious time hovering around her, growing soft! And now you're putting our work at risk. When does it end, huh?"

The room fell into a tense silence, the air thick with the weight of Mingi's accusation. Hongjoong remained seated, his fingers interlocked on the table. He met the taller man's gaze with a cold, unwavering stare.

"Sit down, Mingi," he said quietly, his voice calm, but the authority in it was unmistakable.

Mingi didn't move, his jaw tight, defiance radiating from him. "Answer me," he demanded. "When does it end?"

The room seemed to hold its breath.

"You think I'm neglecting my responsibility," Hongjoong said, his voice low, even, and far colder than before. He rose slowly, pushing his chair back with a deliberate grace. "You think I'm growing soft. Maybe you're right." His eyes, sharp and cutting, bore into Mingi's. "But everything I do is for this gang's survival. Including ensuring her safety."

Mingi scoffed, disbelief written across his face. "Her? She's not one of us. She's a—"

"Enough," Hongjoong snapped, the steel in his voice cutting through the room like a blade. He stepped closer, towering over Mingi now. "You question my judgement again, and it won't be this quiet." His voice softened, but the danger in it was palpable. "I trust Seonghwa to handle this. And I trust you to remember your place."

For a moment, it seemed as if Mingi might push further, but his best friend, the Enforcer's hand tightened on his arm, a silent plea. He growled in frustration and, after a tense beat, finally sat down, seething but silent.

Seonghwa's calm voice broke the heavy quiet. "I'll handle it, Cap. You've made the right call." He shot a glance at Mingi. "We all want the same thing: to be stronger, united. Let's not lose sight of that."

Hongjoong's shoulders relaxed slightly, though his eyes never left Mingi. "Good," he said, his tone final. "Then it's settled."

As the others filed out, Mingi lingered near the door, shooting one last glare at his leader before leaving without another word. The Captain remained behind, letting out a long breath, the weight of the confrontation pressing on him.

He should have known peace wouldn't last. But as his thoughts turned to you, one question echoed in his mind.

How much more would he have to sacrifice to protect you before it all fell apart?

Fortunately—and unfortunately—you had already found the answer to his unspoken question.

"Hongjoong," you whispered, your voice trembling as it cut through the stillness of the dimly lit library.

The soft glow of the lamps cast gentle shadows over the shelves, wrapping the room in an intimate quiet. Across from you, he sat, his eyes warm and attentive, watching you with that familiar, close-lipped smile—the one that always made your heart stutter. His expression was gentle, full of a quiet tenderness that you both craved and feared.

But tonight, that smile felt like a dagger. It broke something inside you, making what you were about to say hurt even more.

"Yes?" he responded just as softly, his voice a soothing balm you didn't deserve. He leaned forward slightly, the care in his gaze evident, as if you were the only thing that mattered in the world.

You swallowed hard, your fingers trembling as they clutched the delicate bookmark he had given you, your lifeline in this moment of unbearable heaviness. "I'm… I'm all better now," you began, the words sticking in your throat. "I wish to leave. I want to go home."

The change in him was immediate. His smile vanished, and his hand shot across the table, grasping yours before you could pull away. His touch was warm but trembling, desperate. "Wha—where is this coming from?" His voice cracked, panic threading through every word. He hadn't known how long he'd have you by his side, but he never imagined losing you this soon. He wasn't ready. "Was it Mingi? Did he say something to you? I swear to god, if he—"

"No," you interrupted, shaking your head firmly, your voice steady despite the ache in your chest. "He didn't do anything." You squeezed his hand, trying to draw strength from the contact. "I just… I think it's time. Time for both of us to return to our own lives."

His grip tightened, his eyes wide with disbelief. "No," he whispered, shaking his head as if refusing to believe your words could make them untrue. "You don't have to do this. You don't need to leave yet. The doctor—I'm having her work on something for the mark. You're not healed, not really."

You bit your lip, his raw emotion tearing through your resolve. You wanted to stay—God, how you wanted to stay—but the memory of that argument was too fresh. You had stood outside the meeting room earlier, waiting for him to finish, only to hear Mingi's voice raised in anger, accusing him of neglect, of weakness. And you had heard Hongjoong's silence—heavy, burdened. You couldn't be the reason for his pain. You couldn't be the weakness he couldn't afford.

"I heard it all," you confessed, voice trembling. "The argument. I know how much I'm complicating things for you." Tears blurred your vision, but you blinked them away. "It's not fair—to you, to them. We're from different worlds, Hongjoong. You and I… we were never going to work." Your voice softened as you finally named what had been unspoken: the feelings between you both.

His face crumpled, the pain etched into every line devastating to witness. "Don't do this," he begged, his voice breaking. "Please… don't."

You closed your eyes, trying to steady your breathing. "This is how we make things right," you whispered. "You wanted to fix what you did, to give me a chance at freedom. This is it."

Silence engulfed the room, thick and suffocating. Slowly, he let go of your hand, as if releasing it would break him entirely. His head bowed, shoulders slumping under the weight of your decision.

"Oh…" It was all he could manage, and the raw pain in that single word nearly undid you.

For a long moment, neither of you moved. The quiet of the library, once a sanctuary, now felt suffocating. You had made your choice, and you believed it was the right one.

So why did it hurt so much?

"I'm sorry," you whispered, standing from your chair. You hesitated, wanting to offer some kind of solace, but knowing it would only prolong the pain. "Goodnight, Hongjoong."

With every step you took toward the door, it felt as though pieces of your heart were left behind. And when you reached the threshold, you heard it—his broken, whispered plea.

"Don't go."

But you didn't stop. You couldn't. Because sometimes, love wasn't enough.

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As if running from you could change the inevitable, Hongjoong buried himself in work, pouring over plans and strategies like a man determined to forget. Meetings stretched longer, tasks multiplied, and he worked late into the night, ignoring the hollow ache growing in his chest. But no amount of work could silence the truth—or erase the memory of your soft, breaking voice.

He could only run for so long.

One day, the quiet was broken by Jongho's hesitant knock on his office door. The youngest cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably under the Captain's tired gaze. "What is it?" he sighed, leaning back in his chair, trying to mask the weariness in his voice.

Jongho straightened, his eyes darting to the barely open door behind him. Hongjoong followed his gaze and froze. There, framed by the narrow gap, was the unmistakable outline of your back.

"It's her, hyung," Jongho said softly, his tone more hesitant than usual. "She... she asked the doctor to give her one final check. To make sure she's fully healed." He paused, as if reluctant to continue. "She expressed her desire to leave."

The words struck like a blade, sharp and final. For a long moment, Hongjoong said nothing, his eyes locked on the empty doorway as if he could will you to return. But deep down, he knew there was nowhere left to run.

He had been a fool to believe that anything could make you stay. He put himself in your shoes for a fleeting moment, imagining what it must be like. You had a life beyond these walls—a life waiting for you to return. And even if you chose to stay, how long could he truly keep you safe in his dangerous world? How long before the life he led consumed you, too?

And even if, by some miracle, you stayed—would your loved ones ever accept him? A gang leader with blood on his hands and sins too deep to cleanse?

No. The answer was clear.

As much as it tore him apart, he knew this was the mercy you deserved. He couldn't chain you to his darkness, couldn't selfishly hold on when letting go was the only way to truly love you.

"You're right," he whispered, more to himself than anyone else. "You have a life of your own. I can't ask you to stay."

The Anchor remained silent, watching his leader with a rare softness in his eyes.

Men like him were never meant to love. Not after all the sins he had committed, all the lives he had taken, all the wrongs he could never make right. He didn't deserve you—not your kindness, your laughter, or the warmth you so effortlessly gave.

No matter how much he wished otherwise.

With a heavy sigh, he turned away from the door, his voice steady but hollow. "Thank you, Jongho. I trust you to make the proper arrangements for her departure."

The youngest hesitated for a moment, but when he met the finality in Hongjoong's eyes, he nodded and left quietly, the door clicking shut behind him. Silence settled over the room again, heavy and oppressive—until the door creaked open once more. The gang leader's head snapped up, irritation flashing in his eyes, but it melted away the instant he saw who it was.

You stood hesitantly in the doorway, peeking in like you weren't sure you belonged there anymore.

He shot up from his seat, his movements hurried. "O-oh, it's you. Come in..." His voice softened, and you offered a small, tentative smile as you stepped inside. He gestured toward the worn leather couch. "Please, have a seat."

But you shook your head. "No, I shouldn't stay long. I just… came to thank you for respecting my decision."

He exhaled, a bitter sound escaping his lips. "Don't thank me for that." His voice was low, laced with frustration, though not at you. "It shouldn't have taken me this long to agree. You were right." His lips curved into a smile, but it didn't reach his eyes. The pain there was unmistakable, and it clenched your heart painfully. "This… it has to end eventually. After all, I'm the one who did this to you. I can't possibly expect you to return my feelings—"

"Stop," you whispered, closing your eyes, shaking your head as if to ward off the self-loathing in his voice. Too late. You already had returned those feelings, and hearing him like this shattered you. "No, Hongjoong, don't say that. I just..."

He stilled, his gaze searching yours as you opened your eyes and met him, resisting the desperate urge to reach out and cup his face, to pull him into the comfort you knew he craved. But you couldn't. So instead, you smiled, soft but trembling, and extended a hand toward him.

"I'm feeling a little hungry," you said gently, your voice trembling just enough to betray your emotions. "Want to have dinner together?"

For a moment, he simply stared at you, as if unsure if he had heard correctly. But how could he possibly say no? Besides, this could very well be your last meal together. Everything else could wait—damn it all.

Until the moment you were safely returned home, you were all that mattered to him.

Just until tomorrow.

Jongho had arranged your ride back tomorrow.

Hongjoong couldn't pretend anymore. He knew this would likely be the last time he'd have you like this, in this fragile peace. So, tonight, he let the walls fall. He no longer resisted the urges that had haunted him for weeks. When he reached out to feed you, gently wiping a stray bit of food from the corner of your lips, you didn't flinch. When he tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, his fingertips brushing your skin with a tenderness that made his chest ache, you didn't pull away.

And you didn't say a word. You just let him.

By the end of the meal, when he saw the glimmer of hesitation in your eyes—knowing you were preparing to retreat to your room—he acted quickly, grasping your hand before you could leave. His touch was firm but not forceful, and when he spoke, his voice was soft, almost pleading.

"Would you like to… walk with me?"

You looked at him for a moment, your eyes searching his as if trying to memorise everything about this moment. Then, wordlessly, you nodded. He led you through the grand halls of the mansion, out to the sprawling, maze-like garden, where the soft glow of lanterns illuminated the paths.

Your hands remained entwined the entire time.

The garden was silent except for the rustle of leaves in the breeze. He guided you to the centre, where a marble fountain stood, the gentle sound of water trickling into the basin adding to the quiet serenity. Clearing a spot on the cold concrete, he shrugged off his blazer, laying it down carefully before gesturing for you to sit. You did, settling beside him as the horizon stretched before you, bathed in soft, silver moonlight.

"This is nice," you murmured, breaking the silence, your voice almost lost in the cool night air.

He smiled, his gaze softening. "It is, isn't it?"

For a while, neither of you spoke. The dim lanterns cast a golden glow, wrapping you both in a warmth that felt almost unreal. Slowly, as if afraid you might slip away, he placed his hand over yours once again. This time, your fingers intertwined naturally, effortlessly, as though they had always belonged that way.

No words were necessary. Every touch, every glance, spoke of everything you felt but couldn't say.

Your heart raced as you turned toward him, only to find he was already watching you. His eyes were dark, filled with emotions you didn't dare name. He leaned in, bit by bit, closing the space between you. Your breath hitched, trembling, but you didn't move away.

"Just for tonight," he whispered, his voice rough and raw. "Can we be together? Just for tonight."

Your eyes burned with unshed tears, your heart aching with the weight of the unspoken goodbye. You nodded, your voice barely above a breath.

"Please."

And then, there was no more distance between you.

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The morning light streamed softly through the curtains, painting the room in golden hues. Hongjoong stirred awake, the weight of sleep heavier than usual, but a comforting warmth grounded him. Instinctively, he snuggled closer, burying his face into the inviting scent that had become his solace.

It took only a moment for the realisation to hit him. The feminine scent, delicate and intoxicating, filled his senses. His heart skipped a beat as he opened his eyes to find you still in his arms, your back pressed against his chest, your breathing soft and even.

For a long moment, he stayed still, simply taking you in—the way your hair spilt over the pillow, the peaceful rise and fall of your shoulders, the warmth that radiated from you. Leaning closer, he pressed a tender kiss to your bare shoulder, the memory of last night rushing back like a tidal wave.

Kisses. Endless, intoxicating kisses, your lips against his as if you were trying to fill every unspoken word between you. His fingers tangled in your hair, your hands gripping his shirt, neither of you willing to let go. The clumsy, desperate stumbling through those kisses until you landed on the expanse of his king-sized bed—so often feeling too big, too empty for just one.

Articles of clothing had been shed piece by piece, carelessly scattered across the floor. And then… pure, unrestrained bliss. The feel of your skin against his, the soft sighs and whispered names, the way your bodies moved together like they were meant to fit. It was a night he would never forget, and one he knew he could never have again.

He swallowed hard as reality settled in. It was bittersweet, finally knowing what it was like to have you this close, only to face the cruel truth that he would have to let it all go soon. His gaze fell on the mark on your soft skin, the one that started it all, and he sighed deeply.

It was the right thing to do.

He repeated the mantra in his head, clinging to it like a lifeline. You deserved more—someone who could give you the kind of life you were meant to have, one without fear, without shadows. Someone who wasn't him.

But for now, just for this fleeting moment, he allowed himself to be selfish. He tightened his hold on you, his arm curling around your waist as if he could stop time by keeping you close. He etched every detail into his mind: the way your warmth seeped into him, the way your presence calmed his restless heart, the way this morning felt like a fragile dream he never wanted to wake from.

Because soon, it would all be over.

And he would have nothing left but these memories.

His temporary haven shattered with a jarring intrusion. The door to his bedroom flew open, and Jongho rushed in, his expression a mix of concern and urgency. "Hyung, she's not in her room—"

The Anchor's voice faltered mid-sentence as his eyes landed on you, curled up in his leader's embrace. The man sat up quickly, pulling the blanket to cover you to your neck, his glare sharp enough to cut steel. Jongho froze like a deer caught in headlights, his usual composure obliterated by the scene before him.

You stirred at the commotion, blinking yourself awake. It didn't take long to realise what had happened. Your cheeks flushed a deep red as you scrambled to free yourself from the blanket and darted off to the attached bathroom. "Excuse me," you mumbled hastily, your voice barely above a whisper, before closing the door behind you.

Jongho stood awkwardly, visibly cringing under Hongjoong's icy glare. "I didn't mean to—"

"Out," the Captain growled, his voice low and dangerous.

The youngest didn't need to be told twice. With a quick bow, he fled the room, muttering apologies under his breath.

Hongjoong exhaled sharply, rubbing his temples as the weight of the morning settled on his shoulders. Deciding to give you the privacy you needed, he rose from the bed, grabbed his robe, and slipped it on before leaving the room.

As he stepped into the hall, he was greeted by none other than the Firestarter, leaning casually against the wall with a smirk plastered across his face.

"Had fun, Cap?" Mingi drawled, his voice laced with mockery. "Hope that pussy was worth everything."

Hongjoong's expression darkened instantly, his eyes narrowing into a glare that could rival a storm. "Speak for yourself, Song," he shot back, his voice steady but laced with venom. "Come mock me when you don't need an exiled noblewoman to save your ass time and time again."

Mingi's smirk faltered as Hongjoong took a step closer, his words cutting like daggers. "Don't think I haven't heard about your multiple near-failures. At least I haven't fucked up anything critical. Also," he added, his tone dropping into something bitter and final, "she's leaving today. I hope you're happy."

The weight of Hongjoong's words left Mingi speechless, his cool façade crumbling. His jaw tightened as he struggled to muster a response, but nothing coherent came to mind.

Clearing his throat, he straightened and forced a shrug, attempting to reclaim his composure. "About damn time. Good riddance," he muttered, though his voice lacked its usual edge. Without another word, he turned and stalked off, leaving the gang leader standing there, his chest tight and his mind racing.

As much as he loathed the confrontation, he couldn't help but feel a bitter sense of satisfaction. At least now, Mingi might think twice before throwing careless words around. But the victory was hollow, his thoughts quickly returning to you.

With a deep sigh, he leaned against the wall, his fingers tracing the edge of his robe. The hours ahead loomed like a storm on the horizon, and he knew they would be some of the hardest he'd ever faced.

ـــــــــــــــﮩ٨ـ

The air was thick with the weight of unspoken emotions as the black car idled behind you, its engine a soft hum against the gloomy backdrop. The overcast sky seemed to mirror the heaviness in both your hearts, the grey clouds threatening rain at any moment. You stood before Hongjoong, your trusty tote bag slung over your shoulder, dressed simply but beautifully, your hair pulled into a messy yet endearing style. You tried to smile, but it trembled at the edges, betraying the storm within.

Neither of you spoke right away, the silence filled with everything you wanted to say but couldn't. Instead, you reached into your bag, pulling out the glass flower charm—the delicate token you had cherished for so long.

"Give me your hand," you murmured softly.

He stepped closer without hesitation, his hand extended between you. The roughness of his palm contrasted sharply with the fragility of the charm as you placed it gently into his hand. His fingers curled around it instinctively, the same hand that once had only known destruction now cradling something so delicate with utmost care.

"For you," you said, your voice steady but laden with emotion. "It's no marigold, but—"

He cut you off with a bittersweet smile, the pain in his eyes unmistakable. "I'll cherish it," he promised, his voice quiet but resolute, as though the words themselves were a vow.

He didn't let go of your hand, his grip warm and steady. You nodded, returning his smile. "Good. Treat it with care," you said, stepping closer, your proximity making his breath hitch.

The scent of his familiar cologne wrapped around you as you leaned in, pressing a lingering kiss to his cheek. Your lips brushed against his skin as you whispered, "You did it, Joong. You made it all right."

His eyes fluttered closed, savouring the moment, the warmth of your presence etching itself into his memory. But then, as much as he wanted to keep you there, you pulled away gently, slipping out of his grasp.

Your backward steps toward the waiting car felt like a slow unravelling, each step tugging at the threads of his heart. He fought every instinct to run to you, to pull you back into his arms and beg you to stay, but he knew he couldn't.

As you slid into the car and shut the door, he stood rooted to the spot, his chest tight, his fists clenched at his sides. He watched helplessly as the car began to roll forward, taking you further and further from him until you were nothing but a distant blur.

"It's for the best," he whispered to himself, though the words felt hollow. "You did the right thing."

The sound of approaching footsteps broke through his haze of sorrow. Turning, he found one of his men standing hesitantly nearby. "Boss," the man said carefully, "we received an update from Seonghwa. His visit to the Red Room is going to be extended due to... undisclosed circumstances."

And just like that, Hongjoong was thrust back into the chaos of his world. He nodded, his voice cold and detached. "Got it. I'll speak with the others."

He turned and strode back toward the mansion, his steps purposeful despite the turmoil inside him. His men watched him carefully, unsure if the heartbreak would erupt into anger, but he remained composed, his demeanour unreadable.

Once inside, he glanced down at the delicate charm still resting in his palm. It caught the dim light of the hall, glinting faintly like the remnants of a dream. His grip tightened around it, not enough to damage it, but enough to ground himself.

It hurt—god, it hurt—but he found solace in the fact that he had been able to love again, even if only briefly. He didn't know how long it would take for the ache to fade, perhaps it never would, but one thing was certain: he would never forget you.

ـــــــــــــــﮩ٨ـ

The dim light of the room cast long shadows across the walls, the flickering of a single desk lamp providing the only illumination. The figure leaned back in his chair, his gloved fingers tapping rhythmically against the polished wood of the table. Before him lay a folder, its contents an intricate web of intel painstakingly gathered. At the very top, clipped securely, was a photograph of the Black Pirates.

The leader's face was circled in white ink—a mark of vulnerability disguised as power.

"Seems we've secured the Captain's weakness right from the start," the figure murmured, a sinister grin spreading across his face. His tone carried a disturbing mixture of amusement and certainty as he flipped the folder shut, the sound of paper against paper breaking the tense silence.

A subordinate stood nearby, his posture stiff, his eyes darting to the file with barely concealed curiosity. "Should we proceed then, sir?" he asked, his voice low but eager.

The figure chuckled, a sound devoid of warmth, and shook his head. "There's no hurry," he replied, his gloved hand resting atop the closed file like a predator savouring its next move. "Time is what we've got. Let them believe they've found their footing. Let them think they're safe."

He pushed the file to the side, leaning forward, his grin widening as his eyes gleamed with cruel intent. "We'll gather them all, one by one. No need to rush—it's always better when the prey doesn't see the trap until it's too late."

The subordinate nodded, though a hint of unease flickered across his features. "Understood, sir."

The figure reached for a glass of whiskey sitting untouched on the desk, swirling the amber liquid as if it contained the answers to every question. "Patience," he said, almost to himself, his voice low and reverent. "Patience wins wars. Let's see how far the mighty gang can go when their carefully constructed world begins to crumble."

He raised the glass in a mock toast, the light catching the golden liquid. "To the Black Pirates. And to the beginning of their end."

The room fell silent again, the only sound the faint creak of the leather chair as the figure leaned back, eyes fixed on the file. Somewhere, far from the machinations of this dark plot, Hongjoong might have felt a shiver down his spine. But for now, he was blissfully unaware, the weight of his loss still fresh, the memory of your departure his only torment.

And so, the game began.

Would you believe it? About 90% of this was drafted in a sleep-deprived state HAHA the first thing I do as soon as I get home from work is write this, so I genuinely hope this met expectations!

Are you or are you not surprised by the lack of a happy ending? If you know me well (especially readers who have been here since TWTHH), you probably saw this coming🤠

As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3

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[joongdunking]

JoongDunk cut from First THK OST MV, My Fuel

Seeing FadelStyle so happily in love makes me so so so happy 🥹🥹

[nateezfics]

PRETTY PINK

PAIRING — hongjoong x reader

GENRE — romance, smut, pwp, established relationship, boyfriend!hongjoong, softishdom!hongjoong, sub!reader, fem!reader, reader is so whiny cuz joong likes to tease :’))

WARNINGS — no plot just smut, unprotected sex//creampie, oral (f receiving), fingering, edging, overstimulation, squirting, pet names (joongie, baby, sweet girl, pretty girl, little girl), praise with degradation, some dacryphilia, lots of teasing, sexual language, intentional lowercase and small font, intentional word abbreviations, uhhh this isn’t really proofread oopsie

WORD COUNT — 2.1k

SUMMARY — you pulled at his pink hair to kiss him again. you exhaled. “i love you too, joongie.” and you really did. even if he enjoyed teasing you just a bit too much.

you huffed and your lips puckered into a pout. you grabbed a handful of pink strands and tugged, hoping that maybe if you yanked just enough you’d finally get what you want. “joongie…”

there was a laugh. hot breath blew against your sensitive sex. you knew he wasn’t going to budge. “such a pouty baby,” hongjoong teased and if you weren’t so desperate to cum, you would’ve squeezed his head off with your thighs. you didn’t bother to lift your head to look, his tone was enough to tell you that he was enjoying this; enjoying your torture. “joongie, joongie, joongie. is that all you know how to say?”

he was mocking you. your face was hot in both embarrassment and frustration. you opened your mouth to speak but words died in your throat when he suckled your clit again. your eyes rolled, your hand that was holding his hair growing tighter. your orgasm was just within reach. you could taste it. your nerves were heightened and your clit throbbed pitifully. but your oh so sweet boyfriend had been denying you of it for some time now, leaving you frustrated and desperate. the need for release was growing borderline painful.

hongjoong laid between your legs comfortably, your knees thrown over his shoulders, your heels digging into his back. he pulled back from you, releasing your achey bud with a lewd pop!. your pitiful little mewl reached his ears and he smiled while his thumbs spread your lips apart. he watched your leaky hole closely, admiring how pretty and swollen it was for him. “such a pretty pussy. so cute and pink and messy.” he leaned in to kiss your clit before swiping his tongue through your folds. he hummed in delight as your slickness coated his tongue.

you lifted your head to peer down at him. through the pink fringe that covered his face you could see his eyes; they were on your pussy, and a serene expression rested on his features. he looked so peaceful, so calm. everything you were not. he was in no hurry it seemed while you were quickly losing patience. not that you had much to begin with. “joongie,” you breathed, “please, i need to cum. so bad it hurts.”

he casted his eyes upwards while his tongue swirled around your throbbing clit. “i know, pretty girl. i know.” you wiggled and squirmed and your heels dug into his back. “you’re just so cute when you’re all pouty. but you can trust me, right? my pretty girl will get to cum soon.”

you all but sobbed. you were so close, his tongue doing just enough to get you to the edge, but not enough to push you over it. a symphony of moans fell from your lips as he continued his sweet torture on your clit. you wanted to buck your hips, to grind into his face for more friction, but his hold kept you rooted to the mattress. he worked you up to the edge yet again, and just when you thought he was finally giving in, his tongue left your clit.

hongjoong kissed your clit again and chuckled at the way you sobbed. “my sweet girl’s so close. gonna make you cum, baby. make you feel so good.”

you whimpered, wiggling against his hold. “joongie, please, i can’t! need to cum. please!” your breathing was growing frantic, your eyes watering, and cunt clenching around nothing. pleas and sighs of his name resounded off your tongue until you sounded like a broken record, both of your hands tangling into his fluffy locks.

“you can, sweet girl,” hongjoong encouraged. he licked your clit. “just wait for me a little more.”

your head shook side to side. tears spilled down your cheeks. you were so desperate, so dumb to anything other than the raging need between your thighs. you were on the verge of exploding. he had worn you down to this whimpering mess, had broken you down into his little whiny girl that depended on him for release. you moaned while he licked and sucked, silently praying he wasn’t going to deprive you yet again.

“you’ve been so good for me, baby. come on, go ahead and cum for me.” hongjoong lifted your thighs and pressed them flat into the mattress, spreading you out perfectly for him. he feasted on you, lapping and sucking on your swollen bundle of nerves until he felt your legs shake in his hold.

with his permission you were catapulted off the edge. finally. your orgasm erupted within your body, flooding every vein and overwhelming every nerve. you shook from the force of it, nerves so heightened from the pent up desire that the sensation was almost too much to bear. just as you started to come down, you felt two fingers slip through your folds. your back arched off the mattress at the overstimulation. “oh, j-joong, fuck!”

hongjoong hummed in delight, removing his mouth from your sex to watch his fingers work in and out of your slippery hole. “didn’t that feel good, baby? you always cum so much harder after i toy with you a little bit first.”

his fingers were quick to find the sweet gummy spot nestled within you. “‘s too much!” he’d worked you up for so long before letting you cum. your nerves were fried; it was all so much.

“after all that whimpering and crying to cum, i’m just giving my sweet girl what she wants.” his voice was sickeningly sweet. his actions were a stark contrast, his fingers reaching in and brushing against your sweet spot repetitively and making your cunt make the most unholy squelching noises. “silly, whiny little girl. just lay back and take what i give you.”

his switch up could’ve given you whiplash. going from taking to giving. this was hongjoong, and fuck it all, you loved the way he worked your body. the way he so expertly controlled your pleasure, like he knew your own body better than you did. his fingers were precise and with your previous high still lingering, you weren’t going to last much longer. “joong! ‘m gonna cum! gonna cum!”

“oh yeah?” hongjoong smirked while he thumbed your clit, offering a few smooth circles before replacing it with his tongue. “cum for me again, baby.”

his tongue flicking your bundle of nerves while his fingers plunged in and out of you was a lethal combination that had you wanting to escape yet hoping he would never stop. you came hard, even harder than before, body shaking as the pleasure wracked your body from head to toe. he milked you so good, continuing what he was doing until you were pushing him off you. “o-oh, my god, joong. please, i can’t!”

hongjoong pulled his fingers out of you finally. he laughed when you sighed in relief before trailing kisses up your tummy. “what? too much for my pretty girl?” you nodded and whimpered and fuck you looked so adorable. how was he not supposed to make a mess of you when you looked like this? he paid attention to your pebbled nipples, sucking on them while his hands gripped the underside of your breasts. you were beyond sensitive, body jerking under his touch. he lifted himself onto his elbows to watch over you, pink hair messy from your hands and chin shiny with your slick. “look how messy you are. so cute.”

you huffed at his teasing tone. he looked a mess, too, though the sight of him in this state was enough to make desire reignite between your legs despite coming twice already. “please, joongie. stop teasing…”

hongjoong kissed your pouty lips, offering you a taste of yourself. “again, you’re so cute when you’re all pouty. i just can’t help but tease you.” he kissed your blushy cheeks before he found your lips again. this time they lingered, kissing you fully and deeply.

you moaned into his mouth as you tasted yourself. your hands found his hair again and tugged to pull him in, deepening the kiss further. “you’re so annoying, you know that?”

your words lacked any weight. hongjoong rolled his eyes. “yeah, i’m so annoying even though i just made you cum twice.” his hips rolled as his your lips reconnected, grinding his neglected bulge into you. he swallowed up your pretty moan and released one of his own, cock throbbing with need for attention. “gonna make you cum a third time, too. around my cock.” a groan. “wanna feel you make a mess all over it, baby.”

“joong…” you whined. he was so damn hard, and it wasn’t until now that you thought about how much he was depriving himself this whole time. “i’m so sensitive, i —”

“you’re going to take it,” he huffed out while working his cock out from his sweats. once freed, he rubbed his cockhead against your slippery folds, mixing his precum with your juices. his tip was warm, red, and leaky. he pushed himself in, just a little, and it was enough to make him throb. “fucking take all of it.”

just the stretch from his tip alone was maddening. your poor little pussy was so sensitive. you mewled and cried as his cock toyed at your entrance. “oh my — fuck, joong!”

hongjoong slipped himself in inch by inch until he was fully settled in your snug cunt. you were wet and warm and tight; so perfectly his. you were made for his cock. “god,” he groaned. “‘m never gonna get over how fucking perfect your pussy feels. fuck.”

he was allowing you time to adjust, but you were so overstimulated just the fullness of him was enough to have you squirming and writhing. fresh tears welled in your eyes before spilling down your cheeks. too much, too much, too much. “i’m gonna, fuck, i’m, ahh!”

hongjoong chuckled at your stuttering, pride swelling in his chest as he watched the tears fall down your pretty face. his thumb rose to your cheek to swipe a stray tear away. “so pretty when you cry,” he kissed another tear just as it fell, “cry for me.” he pulled his hips back painfully slow before thrusting back in sharply. he repeated this again and again before he found a rhythm.

your eyes squeezed shut and even more tears fell. your hands clutched at his cotton candy pink hair. you needed to hold onto something. if you didn’t, you were certain you would’ve flown away from the force of his thrusts. your jaw was slack and mouth agape, silent moans escaping you uncontrollably.

your cunt was taking him in greedily, slick dripping out of you every time he sunk back in. the lewd squelching sounds filled the air, accompanied by the slaps of his hips colliding with yours. it was a nasty symphony. “your pussy is crying too, baby. crying from how good i’m fucking her.” he nibbled at your jawline, teething at the flesh until you whimpered.

his cockhead brushed against your g-spot and your tear filled eyes rolled backwards. you were positive you looked like a disaster, but you didn’t care. not when he was fucking you so good your toes curled. “shit. you feel so good, joongie. s’good!”

hongjoong watched your face. you were so pretty, all fucked out for him. “yeah? i’m makin my pretty girl feel good?” a hand snaked down your body towards where you were joined together. his thumb pressed to your clit and your reaction was immediate. he groaned at the way your walls squeezed him.

“oh god!” you were shaking. you felt like every nerve was on fire as he thumbed your clit at the same pace of his hips. he was drilling into you with practiced precision, hitting your gummy spot over and over and over.

“c-cum, baby, cum for me,” hongjoong encouraged, voice breathy as he fought back his own release. he didn’t let up, circling your clit with his thumb and fucking your tight cunt until you were screaming. “make a mess on my cock.”

you came with a rush, screams of his name filling the room while white hot pleasure overwhelmed your senses. you did as he said, making a mess of yourself all over him until the sheets were soaked in your release. his name fell from your lips uncontrollably.

“shit.” hongjoong, urged by your own release, fell apart above you, hips coming to a halt as he spilled himself inside you. he filled you up until a mix of his seed and your juices began to leak out of your cunt. he leaned down and kissed you as you both came down from your highs, sweaty bodies pressed together. your breaths mingled as your lips slotted together sloppily. your hands remained in his hair. “fuck, baby, i love you.”

you pulled at his pink hair to kiss him again. you exhaled. “i love you too, joongie.” and you really did. even if he enjoyed teasing you just a bit too much.

AUTHOR’S NOTES — idk. like i really don’t. just head full of pink joongie <3

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ALL FICS ARE THE ORIGINAL IDEAS AND WRITTEN WORKS OF NATEEZFICS. DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. REPOSTING WITHOUT CONSENT FROM THE AUTHOR NATEEZFICS IS PROHIBITED!

[holybibly]

I think we do not talk enough about Hongjoong getting pussy drunk. So here are the unholy thoughts of the day, my sugar bunnies.

All of Hongjoong's stress from work on the new album will melt away as soon as he is drunk on your pussy. Or your sexy, grumpy boyfriend has had a very stressful week and there is nothing that can relax him more than the taste of your pretty pussy on his tongue.

"Mmm, angel, you're such a sweet little thing". Hongjoong purrs in a sultrily way, greedily licking the soft, thin skin on the inside of your thigh. "I'm going to eat this pretty princess-pussy until you squirt all over my face." His dark, feline eyes not even for a second leave your lovely, flushed face as he begins showering your sweet mound with short, airy kisses. Hongjoong's hot, wet breath washes over your sensitive folds through the thin silk fabric of your panties, causing you to shiver from pleasure and squirm a little in your seat.

' Joongie...' You sob softly, biting your plump lower lip and tangling your fingers in his dark, soft hair, pulling at the long strands with a gentle tug. A thrill of pleasure runs down your spine as he pokes his pretty, pointy nose into your plump little pussy and takes a deep breath of your rich, creamy scent. Hongjoong rubs himself up against you like a cat, enjoying the warmth of your cunt and the rapidly growing wetness on your silk panties.

The luxurious milky silk is perfectly wrapped around your cunt, clearly outlining the shape of your plump, sticky with your honeyed secretions labia, digging slightly between them, and Hongjoong can't hold back a loud moan when he sees it. Your excitement seeps through the thin fabric to form a large, wet patch on top of it, and he sticks out his tongue to lick a thick, wide strip on your pussy from your throbbing hole all the way to your swollen clit.

His dark, feline eyes never leave your face for a second as Hongjoong runs his tongue over the smooth, slippery with your viscous, sweet mucus fabric, pushing it deeper between your labia as he lathers it generously with his saliva until it's almost transparent.

Damn it, Hongjoong could spend the rest of his life between your legs, and even that wouldn't be enough for him. He was already so intoxicated by your lovely princess-pussy. Even those tiny kitty-licks were enough for him to get his mind completely fogged with the desire to devour your pussy, to slide his tongue inside to caress the tender folds and feel how your luscious juices were pouring into his mouth. 

Hongjoong whispers something inaudible before he begins to run his tongue quickly and jerkingly up and down the length of your slit, stopping his feverish caresses only to leave a hot, slobbery kiss on your swollen clit.  His fingers dig harder into the plush flesh of your thick thighs, which makes his massive rings scratch your soft skin, leaving angry scarlet marks on it. He cups your puffy buttocks with his hands before lifting you over the table and drawing you even closer to him, burying his beautiful face completely in your juicy pussy.

"It feels so damn good..." Hongjoong's voice is nothing but a vicious series of sweet cooing and pussy-hungry wheezes and sighs. 'Tiny, honeyed pussy all dripping and sticky and mine alone."

'Oh my God, Joong!' You squeal, your voluptuous thighs clenching around his head as your gorgeous boyfriend's voluptuous, warm mouth fully engulfs your tender mound, and you hear the faint, slurping sound of wet silk sucking at his mouth.

You wiggle your hips weakly, trying to match the rapid movements of Hongjoong's greedy tongue, causing his soft, plump lips to press directly against your swollen clit, stimulating it in the most delightful way through the thin, sticky tissue. Your quivering little hole shrinks around nothing, spurting out a new flood of sweet, viscous fluid as Hongjoong's perfect teeth cling to your sensitive bud, causing you to squeal loudly and pull his soft, darck hair roughly.

Hongjoong lets out a velvety, panting moan that sends vibrations straight to your heated centre and presses his mouth even harder against your cunt as he continues to slobber and suck on your dirty, juice-soaked panties that were the only thing separating your boyfriend's insatiable mouth from your sweet, plump cunt.

Your thick, plush thighs tremble slightly, and you squeeze them tighter around Joong's head, literally burying his handsome face between your legs as a sweet, almost euphoric feeling of pleasure rushes through you like a jolt of electricity.

You keep letting off tiny, airy sobs, barely audible above Hongjoong's nauseatingly loud, slobbering lapping at your silk-covered cunt. His chiselled jaw is working hard as he sucks roughly and greedily at your panties, as if he's starving to death and you're the only thing that can satisfy him.

"Please, Joongie... I need you so badly. Please give me more, Daddy. Please, pretty please, Hongjoong." Your tone is so terribly whiny, and you can feel his trademark devilish grin spreading across his vicious lips as he rubs his nose against your pussy, still holding your panties in his mouth. The gliding of the wet silk over the sensitive folds of your pussy sends a shiver down your entire body.

Hongjoong spits out the disgustingly wet material of your lingerie out of his mouth and, instead of that, sinks his teeth into the inside of your thigh, causing you to squeal once more.

"Look at you, Princess. You're already such a slut to me, aren't you? Your pretty little knickers are all sticky and wet from the slime that is leaking out of your needy cunt. Would you like the feeling of my tongue being deep inside you? To make you squirt, my baby?" Hongjoong's voice is so dark and deep as he runs his fingernail lightly over your clit through the silk and you cry out, your body starting to shake a little and your cunt clenching around nothing. ' You want this, don't you?

'I'm in need of more, please... Fuck me, Joongie. Let me squirt on your tongue." You start to whimper, looking up at him with your big, pleading eyes and flapping your fluffy eyelashes in a sweet, innocent way, knowing full well that this behaviour of yours is driving Hongjoong insane.

As soon as the words have fallen from your swollen lips, Hongjoong's fingers cling to the silk of your panties before he pulls them aside and gives you a light blow on your pussy. He lets out a soft moan as he admires your beautiful pussy, so wet and swollen. It's moist and pink, like ripe fruit—so sweet and delicious, and he's on the verge of tasting it.

"Pretty, tiny pussy of my beautiful princess." Hongjoong's mouth fills with saliva, and he growls through his teeth as he sees a thick, viscous drop of your slime dripping from your cute little hole. He swallows noisily before he sticks out his tongue and licks it to finally get a real taste of you. A smug grin spreads across his red, wet lips as you scream softly and your hips shake weakly from the intense stimulation. "Daddy's got his baby girl all sticky and wet, perfect for me to eat." The words were almost purr as he spoke them. The syllables were interspersed with an impatient hunger, an almost desperate growl.

"That's it, Princess; dinner is served for Daddy.".

[byuntrash101]

realistic sex with san

san x f!reader fluff | smut | mdni a/n: welcome to this series. where i'll try to imagine how each member would actually fuck, as ✨realistically✨ as possible. happy sannie day. enjoy ♡ disclaimer: i say realistic but lets be honest this is pure delulu behaviour and total fiction. everything is solely based on the vibes the boys give off.

i feel like san isn’t the pursuing kinda guy. he’s really shy at the beginning, especially if he’s crushing on you. since he’s a cancer baby ♋ he would actually avoid you/ignore you. 

At first you would just think he just does not care about you, not necessarily hate you because he would seem so laid back about it but in reality his heart is racing when he sees you and it’s just easier for him to avoid you

so why doesn’t he just go for it? what??? no! you’re crazy? what if you weren’t interested? he would never be able to accept the rejection. so he’d rather have this crush stay as it is. unless you take actions into your own hands? (spoiler it's what you’ll have to do to score this man)

at some point the others are tired of seeing san snob you when you’re around then gush about you when you’re away so one of the member just spills the tea (spoiler alert it was either joong or woo because they were sick of it or yeosang but he didn’t mean to)

so with that new knowledge you’ll just have to make your move

i think he has a careful/cautious nature so he doesn't fold immediately because you could be playing games we never know but he definitely doesn't take long before he gives in because he’s head over heels and can't resist you

after a while, if your actions and words are consistent things change. he gets confident and he’s all over you all the time.

he’s pda line with mingi and woo

he just loves to have you near him, he wants to feel that you are near.

if there’s people around he wont care he just wants to hold your hand or for you to sit on his lap (if he’s feeling naughty he will even sneak his hand on your ass, give a light quiet little spank or just squeeze it in his large gym rat hand because this man just loves your ass)

he’s perfectly fine with you doing your own thing. he doesn't require to be doing every single little thing together but he wants to stroke your thigh when you’re reading and he’s watching his cheesy romantic kdrama. because yeah san is a whole ass romantic. the hopeless kind.

but he’s also realistic. he knows loves comes from trust and communication and oh boy he just knows how to talk to you. even if he’s a little susceptible sometimes (i think he is a sensitive boy thats who’s hiding being the muscle mountain) he always communicates with you effectively. and that's because of his nurturing nature (cancer baby ♋)

At the end of the day san wants to coddle you, cherish you, LOVE YOU.

he has so much love to give. i mean he said it himself he grew up receiving a lot of love so he knows how to receive it and give it

speaking of it love isnt san’s only infinite resource 

i feel like san has also a lot stamina probably the highest out of all of them doesn't mean he has the highest sex drive (that’s probs mingi or joong) but when he’s in the mood he can go for a looooonnng time he is tireless, he is relentless

for instance he never taps out first. when your body is exhausted and your shivering and trembling and he’s came thrice already you have all the rights to assume he is done but then he folds your legs up on your chest again and you whimper because you don’t know if you can take it anymore so he whispers “please baby i just need one more, okay? will you be my good girl, just one more time?” you moan and arch your back as he slides in and he shivers from slight overstimulation. but nonetheless you look up to him through your wet lashes and nod. so he instantly starts to sharply snap his hips against yours, making you whimper meekly. “that's right baby. I knew you could do it, you’re doing so well” he whispers as he gently holds your chin up to bend down and kiss you.

that would be a common occurrence if he’s domming BUT! san is a switch especially with you he likes to hand out the reigns once in a while because he trusts you.

and if he subs that stamina becomes your greatest ally. you can just tie him up and work him with a fleshlight for hours, milking him so many times that the last orgasm has his cock twitching but nothing coming out anymore. You make him cum so much that you both lose count at some point. if he finishes and he softens a little sloppy kiss, a little teasing of his nipples (i feel like he has sensitive nipples idk why kdslmfkdfdmlskf) and then boom he’s hard again. that man just can’t resist you. and he whines for you to stop, to continue, he’s not sure. you can just make him go insane and he loves that.

ok so i teased it in yunho’s part but i think san has a size kink. big one. 

the reason behind it i think is actually an insecurity of his. i don’t think he’s satisfied with his height you can kinda pick up in his body language that it’s a sensitive subject whenever it’s brought up by the other members and i think it’s also part of the reason why he works out so much. sure he will never be tall tall but he can definitely be big. so i think san would be into a partner that’s smaller than him (rip us tall girlies)

so he loves to tower over you, he loves that he’s able to hide you behind him, completely conceal you.

if he’s fucking you missionnary he loves to really emphasize that. “look at you, so small down there?” he loves taking the overly sweet and condescending tone when he doms (it makes you melt every time). “you’re doing so well for me baby. your tiny little body is taking my big cock so well” and he would lay his weight on you, really making you feel small.

also quick side note regarding 🍆 size. i don't think san is really long i think he’s average BUT he’s definitely girthy. He’s got some width to him and i also think he’s slightly curved upwards and god does he take advantage of that. if he fucks you missionary the angle is just devine and he loves to push down on your belly making sure you really feel him (dont mind me screaming rn because of san’s secret bulge kink)

he also loves when you tend to his size kink while he’s subbing. that could sound counterintuitive at first but hear me out

if he’s lying on his back on your shared bed and you are riding him and edging him he would keep his hands to his side not to influence your rhythm. he goes absolutely insane when you say “look at you big boy?” giving a particularly harsh bounce. “you’re suffering quietly? why aren’t you flipping me over and taking me exactly how you'd want” at this point he would beg and squirm so perfectly. “i know why because you know you must not. because you’re a good boy and you’d anything keep it that way right baby?” maybe teasing his nipples a little bit making him grit his teeth. “yes yes i wanna be good for you. i wanna be your good boy. p-please. ah fuck… pleaseplease”. so there you turn around and aim for the finish line he just can't get enough of seeing your perfect ass bounce on his cock. it’s his favorite position he just loves it whether he doming or subbing he loves it and it doesn't take long before he collapses and stuffs you full of pipping hot cum with grunts interspersed with small whimpers.

then when sexy time is done i feel like san is the kind of guy that has to hop in the shower he doesn't stand being sticky especially to bed. if you’re too tired it’s okay because he’s strong and he will carry you to the bathroom and wash you and then he’ll tuck you in bed and spoon you 

he’d rather be the little spoon because he’s a big pouty baby after sex. but he’ll settle for anything if he gets to sleep curled up with you

bonus: i think san’s special kink would be recording you, making a sex tape with you. then watching it together. he would actually love to see more clearly how good he makes you feel or how small you actually look next to him. something he cant really see when he’s in the heat of the moment. he would also definitely tease you about it. “look at you, love. you’re shaking. i guess i must be that good” he would get so cocky about it but if you retort anything his wits go from 100 to 0 real fast. “what about you? look at you fucking moaning and worshipping my pussy? you really can’t get enough of it can you?” then he pouts for a second. Then he wraps his strong arms around your waist and pulls you close to him. “you’re right i can’t get enough of your pretty little pussy.” gives you a kiss on your nape and breathes heavily against your skin “i love how wet you get for me.” an other kiss and another sultry whisper. “can you show me again?” (circle back to the stamina thing… he’s INSATIABLE 😵‍💫)

IF U WANNA HELP ME PLEASE REBLOG WITHOUT USING THE COMMUNITY LABELS 🖤

a/n: finally back with this series! san was so fun to write actually. who will be next jongho, yeosang or hongjoong? just request them in the comments hehe <3

realistic sex with seonghwa, with mingi, with yunho, with wooyoung

ateez masterlist | navigation

[crimsonbubble]

im sorry but I can't stop thinking about mean and sadistic dom joong 😞

he loves to tie you up and tape a vibrator to your thigh at just the right angle to hit right where you're most sensitive. he’ll tie you up with the prettiest silk ties just to make cute bows when he knows the knots are secure. I just know that he also loves to make some home films. that said, he sets up a camera to look back at them when he's away from you.

he always keeps the toy on a low speed at first, enough to feel pleasure but never enough to have you tumbling over the edge. he makes you beg for it. god, he just loves to hear his pretty baby beg for it. loves when you start tearing up bc you can't come like this and you want to be good for him. he's the type to completely ignore your begging with a smirk on his face while you whimper and cry for him.

on another note, when he starts getting ’bored’, he’ll turn the toy up all the way. he’ll push you through orgasm after orgasm, pressing the toy harder against your sensitive spots just to see you shake and buck your hips against it. he just keeps pressing and pressing as you keep coming and coming. oh, he also loves to take pictures of you; before, during, and after. seeing you go from all put together and flushed, to a fucked out and blissful mess, before coming back to your hazy-eyed and boneless puddle on his bed.

[kitten4sannie]

HOT TO GO!

pairing: boyfriend! hongjoong x fem! reader

genre: smut

summary: poor hongjoong always ends up fighting demons when he’s up too late in the studio. he has no choice but to facetime you in hopes that you’ll help solve his dilemma.

w.c: 1.5k

warnings: soft dom but slightly subby! hongjoong, sub with some dom tendencies! reader, phone/facetime sex, teasing, pet names, dirty talk, some instruction giving, tit play/sucking requested by joong (they match each other’s freak okay), mutual masturbation, brief breeding kink

a/n: oh captain my captain~~ oomfs let me know about this wonderful prompt and i simply couldn’t say no 😵‍💫💕 there’s something about a nasty facetime call between two people that are extremely desperate for each other that drives me insaneeeee GOD. enjoy lovelies <3

song rec: cyber sex by doja cat

“Come on, let this be the one,” Hongjoong sighed to himself, listening intently to the track he was in the process of crafting. After hours and hours spent hunched over his monitor, something still wasn’t right. “Fuck, man…”

He rubbed the pads of his thumbs into the bridge of his nose once he removed his reading glasses, pinching it slightly. He glanced at the bottom of the monitor with his bloodshot eyes, noting that the clock had just struck 12, before looking down at his phone screen, tapping it gently, a breathtaking photo of you popping up and almost making him forget where he even was. He couldn’t believe he had to be away from you for so long, stuck inside his studio instead of being being stuck between your trembling thighs, wishing he could listen to the lovely sounds you produced for him rather than the artificial ones he made with his keyboard.

The longer he thought about what you were possibly doing in bed without him, the more he began to squirm in his plush computer chair, grabbing at the crotch of his baggy sweatpants. Maybe if he could just release some tension, he’d finally figure out how to finish the song. And maybe, just maybe, his baby wouldn’t be opposed to helping him out a bit. 

Hongjoong propped his phone up against his monitor and hit the call icon next to your name, biting into his chapped bottom lip, feeling more and more like a pervert the longer he listened to the dial tone drone on, figuring you were probably just trying to get a good night’s rest. And, here he was, trying to get his nut off. “Goddamn it,” he mumbled to himself, resting his head in his hand just as his phone made a familiar chirping sound. It was then that your sleepy voice rang out through the phone speaker.

“Hey, how’s my baby doing?” You smiled at the sight of your slightly disheveled boyfriend on your bright phone screen, kicking off your warm covers. “Are you making sick beats?” 

“The sickest,” Hongjoong replied softly, his lips curling up into a feline-like smile, his tired eyes sparkling at the sight of you. “I’m good now that I’m seeing your pretty face. I missed you today.” 

“I missed you too, Joongie.” You rolled onto your side in your regretfully empty bed, resting your phone against the edge of your pillow, one of your loose tank top straps sliding down your shoulder. “Still in the studio, huh?” You pouted at your boyfriend, batting your eyelashes. “Why aren’t you at home yet? In bed with me?” 

Hongjoong gulped, unconsciously wetting his lips with his tongue, trying not to fixate on the way your tits were squished together, your tank top barely concealing what was hidden underneath. “I wish I was in bed with you right now…so bad…I, actually, couldn’t stop thinking about you before I called. I couldn’t concentrate on my music.” 

You giggled softly, knowing him well enough to know why he was having a hard time keeping eye contact with you, pressing your tits together just a little more, watching your boyfriend’s mouth open slightly. “Oh, so it’s my fault you couldn’t concentrate, huh? Should I take responsibility, Joongie?” 

Hongjoong squeezed his ringed fingers into one of his thighs, biting back the groan he wanted to let out. His baby was always such a tease. It pained him that he couldn’t be there with you physically to tease you back in the way he wanted, knowing he would have you flushed, soaked, and begging for him to be inside you. For now, he would have to make the most of this late night facetime call. 

“You should, babygirl. You’re always so naughty for me when I’m home, always making me think dirty things when I’m in the studio. Just look at what you’ve done to me,” Hongjoong answered huskily, slowly leaning back against his computer chair, allowing you to see the way his stiff cock was pressing into the thin material of his joggers. He squeezed around the base of it, jerking himself off in an agonizingly slow manner, knowing it would drive you insane. “Mm, make it up to Joongie, yeah? Take your tits out.” 

As you obediently tugged your top down and allowed your tits to spill out, much to Hongjoong’s satisfaction, he tugged his leaking cock free from its confines, causing you to begin to drool almost as if on command, having to swallow it all down to keep it from spilling out, wishing your boyfriend was on the bed next to you so that his heavy cock could plug up your throat. For now, you would have to settle for watching him touch himself on your phone screen. “Now what, Joongie?” you asked, bringing your free hand up to your tits to grope and squeeze at them. 

“S-suck on them…” he requested perversely, a bead of sweat dripping along his temple. 

Propping your phone against one of your plushies, you brought both of your hands to the undersides of your tits, slowly bringing them up near your mouth. “Joongie’s a little pervert, huh? Wanting to watch his baby suck on her own tits like this….” 

“I-i am…wanna see you be naughty for me…” Hongjoong blushed heavily, pulling at the strings of his hoodie in an act to conceal himself, his dilated eyes still focused solely on you, his hand squeezed tight around the base of his cock, feeling it throb persistently. 

Humming, you brought one of them to your mouth, idly licking around and over your nipple until it hardened against your tongue, sucking it into your warm mouth and moaning, before giving your other tit the same treatment, occasionally looking up at your boyfriend with hazy, half-closed eyes, wishing your wetness was leaking out around his moving cock, instead of soaking into your panties. “Baby…stop for a second…” you whispered, squeezing your thighs together. 

“Yes, princess,” Hongjoong obeyed breathily, taking his hand off of his length and instead grabbing at his thigh, his stiff cock twitching upwards like it had a mind of its own, sticky pre-cum pooling from his tip and dripping down the side. It looked like he was going to bust at any given second. 

Licking your lips at Hongjoong’s pitiful state, you sat up on the bed and faced your phone, opening your slick covered thighs, pulling your panties to the side and spreading yourself open to show your boyfriend the way your pretty pink hole fluttered around nothing.  “Can you please fuck me? I’m so empty, I wanna cry…” 

“Oh my godddd, baby,” Hongjoong groaned, watching closely as you rubbed your fingers over your cunt, able to hear just how incredibly wet you were for him, eventually tugging his hood off of his head and running his fingers through his hair, gripping it for a second to keep himself from tweaking. “I wish I could fuck you dumb right now…You have no idea how bad I wanna fill you up…” 

“Guess I’ll have to get the job done myself until you get home, huh?” you sighed playfully, just as you easily slipped two fingers inside yourself up to the knuckles, adding a third because you could, before fucking them in and out of you, the obscenely wet sounds your cunt made each time sending Hongjoong into a deeper state of need. “J-joongie, please cum inside me…I need it…”

Letting out a whimper, Hongjoong resumed his desperate act of self pleasure, quickly collecting his abundant pre-cum to slick up his twitching cock each time his closed fist moved near the shiny, red tip. “Gonna cum, baby, gonna cum so hard for you…” 

Keeping your eyes locked on your boyfriend’s half-lidded ones, you quickened your pace, your fingers beginning to cramp, curling them up just enough to pound them into your g-spot, causing your gasps to turn into whiny moans, a few tears starting to spill from your eyes, similar to the arousal that was spilling out of your pulsing cunt. “I’m cumming, Joongie, fuck– Fill me up, please, please, please…!” 

Hongjoong threw himself back into his chair, emitting a few soundless moans, before he began to let out one long groan, desperately bucking up into his closed fist, until a stream of milky, white liquid shot out.  “Fuck, I’m gonna knock you up, princess….There’s so much…” he sighed out, tossing his head back, milking his aching cock with a shaky hand, a few beads of cum spilling out onto his skin. 

The both of you grew quiet as you came down from your highs, simply panting and trying to catch your breath, still gazing at one another through your phone screens. 

You picked up your phone and brought it closer to your face, batting your lashes at him once again, whispering, “You better finish up that song and get your ass home, Joong. As much as I love watching you make a mess of yourself, that wasn’t nearly enough for me.” 

After practically melting into his chair, Hongjoong sat up and nodded his head obediently, biting his lip at the implication that the both of you would be going at it all night. He pushed some of his sweaty hair back just to let it fall into his now narrowing eyes, making sure you were looking at him when he guaranteed, “I’ll be sure to ruin you later, princess. Wait up for me, yeah?”   

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© kitten4sannie, 2024.

[lifeless-firefly]

I am a Kant truther through and through and i am sooo in agreement with the statement above. Kant hate is so beyond making any sense. like people are not looking at Kant from every angle and aspect. this is a man not doing things out of his own will, this is a man in constant turmoil, this is a man wanting to pull away from the situation but literally having no way out. this is a man i so deeply love.

I knew media literacy was down while watching We Are and people were hating on Fang for not being as lovey dovey as Tan. Incapable of seeing that Fang had his own form of "lovey dovey" in his actions versus Tan and his words. So people watching dramas like The Heart Killers and straight up missing very obvious points doesn't shock me. I'm not making fun of people by any means, I just think too much of the QL media world lacks some form of literacy while watching these shows.

People are bad mouthing Kant like he's some sort of supervillain or antagonist. You don't even need knowledge of Taming of the Shrew to understand the dynamics between the four mc's (though if you want some, there are people on here diving into that). My point is, Kant, Style, Bison, and Fadel are not meant to be squeaky clean characters. I mean two of them are manipulating the other two, sleeping with them, and lying to them. While the other two are literal murderers. You aren't supposed to think these guys are totally upstanding. But the emphasis on Kant hate is bizarre.

Especially since Kant has always had most to lose in this. Style only really has to worry about his own safety but he already knows Fade! won't kill him.

Bison/Fadel could easily kill both boys or get "mom" to fix their issues. So they don't have ways out regardless of both being in love. But Kant has always had no way out. So much of this story is a conversation about what people will do when they are desperate with backs against the wall. Outside of Style, the other 3 had lives they had no control over.

There's so many layers and social issues at play in this that I cannot fathom people focusing on hating Kant. But that's just me.

+Don't even say that I am a firstkhao Stan which is why I'm saying this because this is actually only the second time l've watched them. The only other time was OF and I didn't even watch that for them. So this has nothing to do with bias.

[makeitmingi]

The Babysitter Club [From: Our Shared Melody]

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Wife!Reader, Daughter (Kim Hwayeon), IdolHusband!Hongjoong, IdolUncle!Ateez

Summary: When your work requires you to travel, Hongjoong insists that he is fine taking care of your daughter on his own, with the help of her chaotic uncles. You were hesitant at first, considering he has never really taken care of your daughter on his own before. But what's the worst that can happen... right?

Word count: 11.4K

[A/N: Sort of Part 2 to 'Our Shared Melody' But it can be read as a stand alone too!]

"Baby?" You spun around in slight surprise, seeing a half asleep Hongjoong shuffling out of your shared bedroom. He finds you standing in front of your open on board bag, gathering what you need last minute for your flight.

"What are you doing up? You should go back to sleep." You scolded softly. But he shook his head, shuffling all the way to you and wrapped his arms around you.

"Did you really think I wouldn't wake up to send you off? You already wouldn't let me send you to the airport." He mumbled.

"Because it's 4 am and you have work tomorrow, Joong." You chuckled, resting your cheek on his shoulder.

"You all packed and ready?" He asked, stroking your head. It took a while for you to answer. Well, you didn't really answer him, you just let out a small, barely audible hum.

"What's wrong?" Hongjoong knew you too well. He knew that something was wrong. It was written all over your face.

"I don't know if I should go... You know, maybe I should just tell my boss I can't make it." You pulled away from the hug to meet his eyes.

"Baby... It's fine, it's okay. Melody and I will be okay. It's only 2 days." He said, hand tucking a loose lock of hair behind your ear, as he spoke to you gently. Hongjoong didn't make fun of you for worrying, he understood you and comforted you, trying his best to soothe your worries and hesitation.

"But I've never been away from her before... Since birth." Your voice wavered slightly. It's not that you didn't trust Hongjoong. He was a great dad and was great with his daughter.

"I didn't expect me to have separation anxiety but it's really killing me." You whimpered.

"Oh, baby. It's okay." Hongjoong brought your head back down to his shoulder as he rubbed your back.

"She'll be the same in 2 days, I promise. I know it's not easy for you to leave." He murmured, planting little kisses along your cheek and your jaw line.

"I know but-"

"This is a great opportunity for you. Your boss is giving you this great responsibility and you'll be able to network there. We both know you've worked hard for such an opportunity." He said.

You usually work from home but your boss had asked you to take a short trip to Hong Kong to represent the company at a conference. This was the major break you needed in your job. But you've been stressing over the thought of leaving your daughter.

Hongjoong was the one that convinced you to go when you were leaning towards turning your boss down. He wanted you to look good for your boss and the company.

"You shouldn't be late. Your car is arriving soon. Go say bye to melody." He encouraged.

"Okay." You nodded, leaving Hongjoong's embrace. He stood in the living room to wait for you and give you some alone time.

Entering your daughter's room, you were careful not to disturb her rest. You leaned over the floor mattress she was sleeping on, pressing your nose to her cheek.

"I love you. I'll see you in 2 days." You whispered, inhaling her familiar, comforting scent before giving her a kiss.

"Aww, baby." Hongjoong pouted, cooing at you when you exited the room with tears in your eyes.

"It'll be okay." He patted your head. He cupped your cheeks, wiping your tears with his thumbs before giving you a kiss.

"I feel like you're teasing me now." You frowned.

"Wouldn't dare to. I'll bring melody to pick you up from the airport when you get back, hmm?" He rubbed your arm. You nodded with a grateful smile, throwing your arms around him to hug him tight. You knew you needed to leave or else you would never leave. While wearing your shoes, you saw Hongjoong wearing his slides.

"You don't have to walk me down. She could wake up and need you." You told Hongjoong but he was stubborn as ever.

"I'm taking care of my first baby. There's no way I'm letting you walk out on your own. It's so dark." He said, ignoring you and wheeling your luggages out to the lift lobby to wait for you.

"Thank you." You slipped your hand into his.

"That's my car." You checked your phone, pointing to the cab that was waiting.

"Good morning." The two of you greeted the driver. Of course, Hongjoong loaded your bags into the boot, not wanting you to do any of the lifting.

"Goodbye, baby. Have a safe flight and don't worry, okay? Call me." He hugged you tightly, giving you a long kiss.

"I will. Thanks, Hongjoong. If you need me, you know I'll come right back." You said.

"I know you will but it'll all be okay, I've got things covered. Good luck during the conference. I love you." He stroked your cheek with a smile of adoration and love. Gosh, Hongjoong really loves you so much and you love him too.

"I love you too, Joong. So much." You smiled. He opened the door to the backseat for you to enter. Once you were in, he closed the door. You blew him a kiss and waved to him as the cab drove off.

"Bye." He waved back, standing there until the cab disappeared down the driveway. After that, he went back up to your daughter.

Your daughter, Hwayeon, is now 18 months. She was everyone's princess, having everyone wrapped around her finger. And until now, Hongjoong still calls her 'melody'.

"Eugh..." When Hongjoong entered the house, he heard Hwayeon's soft whimpers and rushed over immediately.

"Shh, shh. It's okay, melody." He was by her side instantly, patting her tummy to soothe her.

"Appa is here." He laid beside her, propping his head up with his free hand, continuing to comfort her until her whimpers died down and she was lulled back to sleep.

This was a common occurance now with Hwayeon waking up in the middle of the night to look for you and Hongjoong. She was still getting used to sleeping on her own, in her own bed and in her own room. So usually, you or Hongjoong would go comfort her in her bed instead of bringing her to your bed.

"It's okay..." Soon, even the rhythm of the movement from Hongjoong patting her tummy made him fall asleep too.

-

"Hongjoong ah?" Seonghwa called out as he entered the house, looking for the captain, who has not been answering his phone since the morning.

Scratching his head, Seonghwa went to your bedroom, hoping to find the captain there but the bed was empty.

"Bah!" Having heard the soft, familiar voice of his goddaughter, Seonghwa went to her room.

"Oh. My love." Seonghwa saw the little girl sitting up on the mattress. She shakily toddled to Seonghwa and he immediately scooped her up into his arms. That was when Seonghwa found Hongjoong fast asleep in his daughter's bed.

"Yah, Kim Hongjoong. Wake up, you're late." He nudged the sleeping male with his foot. Hongjoong frowned slightly and peeked open an eye, seeing Seonghwa standing over him.

"Oh, Seonghwa... You're here..." Hongjoong yawned, stretching his arms over his head.

"I'm here because you're late. I've been trying to reach you the whole morning!" Seonghwa scolded. Now, that woke Hongjoong up,

"What?! My phone was left in my bedroom, I didn't hear my alarm or the calls come in." He shot up, running his fingers through his hair as he woke himself up.

"Don't curse with my godchild in the room." Seonghwa reminded. Hongjoong slapped a hand over his own mouth, nodding.

"Go get ready. I'll handle Hwayeon." Seonghwa said as he exited the room.

Luckily, Seonghwa knew what to do, having helped you and Hongjoong care for Hwayeon from the moment she was born. Since they've met and Seonghwa carried her for the first time, he's been such a fool for her. He claims that he didn't know the true meaning of love until Hwayeon came into his life.

And although the hanja characters of the 'Hwa' in their names are different, Seonghwa still liked to think of her as 'baby Hwa' like she was really his daughter.

"What a cute bunny." Seonghwa cooed as he dressed Hwayeon up in a fluffy bunny jacket that he bought.

"I knew you would look cute in it." He chuckled, even if she didn't understand him.

One more thing, Seonghwa loves to spoil Hwayeon, something you and Hongjoong discourage but Seonghwa says that Hwayeon was born for him to spoil. It was hard to argue with him.

"Bah!" She babbled, as if repeating after him with a bright smile.

"That's right, cutie" Seonghwa tapped her nose. With her resting on his hip, Seonghwa put together a bag for her.

"Shall we get you some snacks too?" He stood at the fridge, grabbing a yoghurt pouch for her then grabbed random snacks from the cupboard. He also filled a water bottle while Hongjoong grabbed a spare set of Hwayeon's clothes.

"Ah! Wait, a minute. Where is that-" Hongjoong disappeared into his work room, tripping over his own feet and almost falling, making Hwayeon laugh.

"Even your daughter is laughing at you." Seonghwa chuckled with a shake of his head.

"Alright, alright, we're already late. Let's go, melody." Hongjoong said, slipping his shoes on and holding Hwayeon for Seonghwa to wear his shoes. He carried her down to the carpark.

"I'll strap her in." Seonghwa said so Hongjoong could start the car. He climbed in to sit beside Hwayeon.

"So, she left last night?" Seonghwa asked. Hongjoong knew who he was referring to.

"Yeah. Almost didn't want to leave but I managed to convince her. I think she has more separation anxiety than melody. But I don't blame her... I just hope that melody wouldn't just look for her randomly..." Hongjoong sighed as he drove. Even saying your name might remind Hwayeon of you so he avoided it.

"Yeah, let's hope then. And it's a mother thing, Hwayeon was practically a part of her for 9 months." Seonghwa said, completely understanding you.

"Here you go." He handed Hwayeon a yoghurt pouch since they didn't have time to give her breakfast.

"I've got to get to my meeting when I arrive. Can you look after her first? I'll come get her when it's over." Hongjoong asked.

"Of course. Just text me later." Seonghwa replied, too focused on smiling at Hwayeon eat the yoghurt. Anything that she did, Seonghwa would find cute.

"Okay, we're here." Hongjoong parked the car.

"I love you, melody. I'll see you later, appa has to work. Be good for Hwa, alright?" He showered his daughter in kisses.

"Thanks, Hwa! Bye!" Tossing the keys to Seonghwa, Hongjoong ran into the building.

"Your appa is seriously something else." Seonghwa chuckled, shaking his head. He helped Hwayeon out of her car seat and retrieved her baby bag. Slinging it over his shoulders, he locked the car and walked into the lift lobby.

"There we go. Stay close, lovey." Once they were safely inside, Seonghwa put Hwayeon down to let her walk. Not having to worry about the cars.

"Seonghwa hyung! Did you manage to find Hongjo- And who is this adorable bunny?" Yunho grinned, bending down.

"Yu!" Hwayeon giggled and slowly waddled over to Yunho. She gripped onto the material of his sweats to steady herself.

"Hi~" Yunho cooed. When Hwayeon made grabby hands at Yunho, the taller didn't even hesitate, hoisting her up into his arms. The Ateez boys were all fools for the captain's little girl.

"Hongjoong was still asleep when I went to look for him. I think he slept with Hwayeon somewhere in the night so his phone was left in his room." Seonghwa explained.

"Oh yeah, I forgot that captain's on his own for the next few days." Yunho said, remembering the note you sent to the group chat.

"Mhmm, she left last night. So for the next two days, we'll need to help Joong out." Seonghwa nodded.

"Well, of course. We'll always be willing to take care of the little angel." Yunho laughed and tickled Hwayeon, making her giggle and squirm in Yunho's hold. Seonghwa smiled softly, seeing and hearing Hwayeon's laugh. Her happiness was just infectious. The 3 of them took the lift up to the artists' lounge

"Yunho ah, put her down. We should be encouraging her to walk more to build strength." Seonghwa said to the taller male.

"Hyung, please let me have this. Sooner or later, she's going to refuse to be carried by us. At least now, she still wants us so let me savour this moment." Yunho pouted.

Hwayeon had just learnt to walk so you wanted to try to encourage her to walk to build strength in her legs.

"You're unbelieveable." Seonghwa clicked his tongue.

Yunho continued to make funny face at Hwayeon. Even if she didn't understand what was going on, she laughed, holding onto Yunho's cheeks.

"Who else is here?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho shrugged. He balanced Hwayeon in one hand as he pushed open the door to the artists lounge and pantry.

"Is that my princess?" San, who was having his meal, stood up upon seeing Hwayeon. Yunho put Hwayeon down and he patiently waited for Hwayeon to make her way over to San. He picked her up and she wrapped her arms around San's neck.

"I've missed you." San carried her, speaking in a baby voice as he showered her in kisses. That sent her into another round of laughter. Hwayeon really was loved by all her uncles.

"You should continue eating." Yeosang said, bringing Hwayeon to his lap to sit so San could eat.

"She might still be hungry since we rushed out." Seonghwa said, opening a pack of snack puffs for Hwayeon to pick at.

"Can I have 1?" Yeosang asked. Hwayeon grasped one in her hand and placed it in Yeosang's hand. The male cooed and kissed the top of her head before eating.

"Is there anything else we can give her? She seems hungry." San asked.

"We only have snacks until Hongjoong gets her lunch." Seonghwa said. He

"Hongjoong's in a meeting so we have to watch her until he's done." Seonghwa informed, taking a cup of juice for himself from the fridge. He filled Hwayeon's sippy cup with the juice as well before handing it to her. Of course, Hwayeon had a sippy cup in the KQ pantry. She was there so often.

"Hey, everyone. Hey, bun." Mingi entered, having finished his workout session with the trainer in the gym. He went straight to get some cold water from the cooler.

"Mi." Hwayeon made a grabby hand at Mingi. Mingi chuckled, putting the water bottle down to lift Hwayeon up.

"He's sweaty." Yunho crinkled his nose.

I'm not sweaty. I changed my shirt after the workout was done." Mingi scoffed, taking another sip of water then closing the water bottle so he could carry Hwayeon properly.

"Hongjoong hyung's not around?" He asked. Seonghwa shook his head.

"Mam mam." Hwayeon pressed a fruit puff against Mingi's lips to let him eat it. He happily ate it, even if there wasn't much of a taste.

"That's my bun." Mingi chuckled. Their bond was close, Hwayeon having grown up in Hongjoong's studio with Mingi always around. Mingi wasn't a fan of children at first, not knowing how to act around them but Hwayeon was too cute to resist.

"You guys, stop carrying her so much. (y/n) said that Hwayeon is supposed to be walking more to ween her off being carried by us." Seonghwa scolded.

"Soon she won't even want us to carry her already, hyung. Let us have our moment." San said.

"That's what I said." Yunho agreed, poking Hwayeon to tickle her again. She laughed and tried to hide in the crook of Mingi's neck.

"Looks like Hongjoong's meeting is running late. I might need to head to my vocal lesson soon." Seonghwa said, checking his phone to see the text Hongjoong sent.

"Why don't you go ahead, hyung? We got it covered, we'll take her to Joong hyung later." San offered.

"Fine but no stealing her and running off elsewhere. She has to remain in KQ. If Hongjoong finds out and can't find her, he'll kill all of us. I'm serious, guys." Seonghwa threatened them. They have tried to take Hwayeon out before, which ended up in the news with reporters thinking Hwayeon was their kid, not Hongjoong's.

First, it was Seonghwa having Hwayeon's picture as his wallpaper and showing it to ATINY at the airport, gushing over how adorable she was. That made everyone think Hwayeon was his daughter.

Then, Wooyoung calls Hwayeon his 'baby' which made everyone think he had a daughter and was a single parent.

The last instance was Mingi being pictured holding Hwayeon while recording and he posted it on his social media, captioning 'my bun'.

So basically, Hongjoong got fed up and jealous that people thought Hwayeon was his member's daughter and not his so he didn't allow them to bring her out alone.

"Says the one that has been trying to kidnap her since she was born. You even tried to hide her in your jacket once as if (y/n) and Hongjoong hyung wouldn't notice." Yeosang pointed out.

"Hey, I can't help that my goddaughter is the cutest baby ever." Seonghwa shrugged, not even denying it, reaching out to pinch Hwayeon's cheeks. Hwayeon giggled shyly, placing her own hand over Seonghwa's.

"Be good for samchons, okay? Appa should come soon." Seonghwa smiled at her, running his fingers through her hair.

"Papa?" She tilted her head, not knowing what Seonghwa was saying.

"Yeah. I'll see you later, my love." Seonghwa hugged her, showering her in kisses while she clutched onto the material of his hoodie. He put her down and she climbed back onto Mingi's lap.

"Hyung, you're only going for vocal lessons. You're acting like you're not going to see her forever." San laughed.

"Shut it." Seonghwa whipped his head around to glare at San. But he waved to Hwayeon with a sweet smile and left. Hwayeon was not really sure what was going on.

But Hwayeon's bottom lip quivered, sending the remaining boys there into a panic. San picked her up, stroking her back to soothe her. Luckily, Mingi shook his wrists and successfully distracted her with the jingling sound of his bracelets. San set her back down in Mingi's lap as she fiddled with the bracelets around his wrists.

"See? You're okay, bun." Mingi comforted, patting her back as she leaned against his body like he was a chair. After that, San, Yeosang, Yunho and Mingi brought Hwayeon with them to the dance studio.

"There you go." Yunho set her down on the couch, giving her some toys that Seonghwa brought.

As the boys practiced, they all made sure to keep an eye out on Hwayeon, watching her through their practice room mirror.

"Take 5." San panted, laying on the ground and catching his breath. Hwayeon, who was bored of her toys, slipped down from the couch and stood over San, tilting her head in confusion.

"Sannie samchon going night night, bun." Yeosang chuckled while Yunho laughed.

"Wanna dance, princess?" San sat up, encouraging Hwayeon with a soft smile. Mingi played the music and Hwayeon bounced on her knees. The four uncles swooned, clapping and bobbing their heads with encouragement. Yunho had his phone to video the moment.

"Go, bun!" Mingi, the hype man, cheered Hwayeon on. Hwayeon smiled, looking at the three with excitement, jumping up and down. She held onto San's hand, being a little wobbly.

"Little dance prodigy." Yunho stroked her hair.

"Hongjoong hyung's done with his meeting. I'll bring her up to the studios since I'm meeting Eden hyung." Mingi said, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

"Pack her stuff first." Yunho said, putting all her toys and belongings back into the baby bag.

"Aww, bye, princess." San opened his arms and Hwayeon gladly walked into them, he gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"We'll miss you, pretty princess." Yeosang smiled, hugging her too.

"Bye, princess. Yuyu will see you later." Yunho gave Hwayeon a hug too. He tapped his cheek and Hwayeon leaned in to give him a peck, making him grin.

"Let's go, bun." Mingi called. Hwayeon walked in front of Mingi as they headed up to the studio floor. They took their time, Mingi slowly walking beside Hwayeon, not wanting to rush her.

"Look who is at the studio today. Hello~" They ran into Maddox. Maddox was another familiar face to Hwayeon. But she shyly clutched onto Mingi's pant leg. Mingi continued to lead her to Hongjoong's studio. He knocked on the door.

"Ap... pa!" Hwayeon beamed, happy to see her dad come to the door.

"Hello, my melody." Hongjoong bent down to pick her up. Hwayeon immediately wrapped her arms around Hongjoong's neck. No one beats her dad.

"Thanks for looking after her and bringing her up, Mingi ah." Hongjoong said, taking Hwayeon's bag from the taller.

"No problem, hyung. We're always happy to take care of her. She had fun at the dance studio." Mingi grinned.

"Did you?" Hongjoong asked Hwayeon, tickling her.

"She might be hungry though, hyung. We didn't give her lunch but Hwa hyung gave her some snacks. Although it's not enough for a meal." Mingi informed.

"Alright, I'll order her some food before going back to work. Thanks, man. Say bye to Mingi samchon, melody." Hongjoong told Hwayeon. Hearing that another one of her uncles was leaving, she pouted and whined, shaking her head. She tried to reach out to Mingi again but Hongjoong held her away.

"Aww, bun. I'll be back to see you later, alright? I promise." Mingi pouted at her sad face, feeling guilty for leaving her.

"Mi." Hwayeon began to cry. Mingi grew conflicted but Hongjoong nodded at him to just leave.

"I'm sorry. Bye, bun." Mingi tapped her cheek before leaving to his meeting with Eden. Hongjoong closed his studio door with his foot as Hwayeon whined.

"Aww, melody. You just wanted to play with Mingi samchon?" Hongjoong cooed, wiping her tears.

"It's okay, melody. We'll see him later at dinner." He comforted her as he set Hwayeon's bag down in the corner.

"Appa is here, sweet girl." He whispered, kissing her temple. Sitting back down in his chair, He che let Hwayeon's body lean on his as he opened the delivery app.

"Let's get you some food and then a nap. You're probably tired, melody." Hongjoong brushed her hair back.

The food came and Hongjoong tried his best to feed Hwayeon so she wouldn't make a mess in his studio. It was rather successful actually, Hwayeon was too hungry to try and steal the spoon form Hongjoong. But he knew you would kill him if you knew.

You were trying to help Hwayeon develop more independent skills, as recommended by the paediatrician. But Hongjoong liked his little girl depending on him and didn't want her to grow up.

"You eat so well~" Hongjoong praised, wiping her mouth as she ate the last bite.

When she chewed, Hongjoong took the opportunity to take a bite of his food too. He wasn't that hungry since he was focused on her.

"All done!" Hongjoong cheered, making Hwayeon laugh. While watching her, Hongjoong began to clear up the area, throwing the trash into the plastic bag.

"Let's go." He lifted her up to bring her with him to put the trash outside.

"Alright. You can do some doodling." Hongjoong set up Hwayeon's drawing pad and crayons for her to doodle.

He let her draw and play with her toys until he noticed her showing signs of sleepiness. She rubbed her eyes with her hands and yawned as she doodled. Plus, this was the time she usually had her first nap of the day. But like every other child, Hwayeon wasn't a fan of being told it was nap time.

"Melody~" Hongjoong called out softly. Hwayeon lifted her head to look at her father. Hongjoong wheeled his chair over to her and patted his lap.

"Come to appa." He offered, lifting up the stuffed puppy that she has slept with since she was a baby.

"Mmm." She nodded, opening her arms so Hongjoong could lift her up onto his lap. She grasped the puppy, hugging it to her chest.

Another trait Hwayeon, fortunately, inherited from her father is his ability to sleep anywhere. So in a few minutes, Hwayeon was passed out in Hongjoong's hold, her body leaning against his.

"I love you." He kissed the top of her head softly. Hongjoong kept her there for a while, wanting to hold her close, before laying her on the couch.

'HOW'S MY BABY?! - (y/n)'

'Hello to you too, wifey. I'm doing great, thanks for asking. - Joongie'

'Good to know. How's my baby? Is she okay? - (y/n)'

'Yes, baby. Melody is fine, I just put her down for her nap after she had lunch. She's been great, soaking up the love and attention as the princess of KQ. Honestly, I think her samchons are having a greater time than she is. - Joongie'

'That's great to hear. I knew you could do it, Joong. And I was kidding, I miss you too. A lot. - (y/n)'

'I know. I miss you too, baby. But we'll see you in a couple days. I'm gonna work until melody wakes up. All the best for your conference. - Joongie'

"Hu..." Hwayeon fussed, whimpering in her sleep. Hongjoong put his headphones down and rushed to Hwayeon.

"Shh, it's okay, melody." He rubbed her back but she still continued to squirm around.

"Come here, melody." Hongjoong moved her to his lap again, adjusting his chair so he was in a leaned back position. He rubbed her back until she was soothed and back to sleep.

With the sleeping child on him, Hongjoong tried to wheel himself as close to the table so he could reach around Hwayeon to his keyboard.

'Let yourself in later. Melody is sleeping on me. - Hongjoong'

'Need me to take over? - Seonghwa'

'I'm good for now, I'm just working on my own stuff. But when Maddox comes for guide recordings, I'll need you to take her for her second nap if that's okay? I'm worried about the noise - Hongjoong'

Seeing Seonghwa react with a thumbs up emoji, Hongjoong put his phone down and went back to work. He was really grateful Seonghwa could help him, the latter was better with children than Hongjoong was. Seonghwa was proactive but knew Hongjoong too, he knew when to help and when to take a step back.

"Ap...pa..." Luckily Hongjoong only wore his headphones over one ear so he could hear Hwayeon slowly wake up from her nap.

"Good morning, melody. Aww, it's okay." He cooed and picked her up, rubbing her back to soothe her. Hongjoong felt Hwayeon bury her face into his shoulder while his hand cradled her.

"Mama..." Hwayeon whimpered.

"It's alright, melody. It's appa, it's okay." He comforted. Hwayeon frowned a little, recognising her dad.

"See, it's appa?" She wrapped her arms around his neck. He hummed and walked around his studio until she was calm. She yawned, resting her chin on Hongjoong's shoulder.

"Let's go wash up a little, hmm?" Leaving his things, Hongjoong grabbed the baby bag and went to the bathroom.

"Did you sleep well, my melody?" He cooed as he wet one of her baby towels to wipe her face. She grinned at Hongjoong in reply. Hongjoong smiled, kissing the top of her head. Then he changed her diaper and gave her fresh clothes.

"Since Hwayeon didn't want to be let down yet, Hongjoong held her in his arms.

"Is that my baby?!" A loud yell was heard in the hallway, making Hongjoong turn around and Hwayeon lift her head.

"Ah! My baby!" Wooyoung grinned excitedly.

"Wooyoung, she just-" Before Hongjoong could say anything, Wooyoung took Hwayeon into his arms. Wooyoung was another one that children just naturally liked.

"Ooh, you missed Wooyo samchon? I missed you too, my baby." He snuggled her and kissed her cheek.

"She just woke up so she may be fussy." Hongjoong sighed, patting Hwayeon's back as she latched onto Wooyoung.

"Nonsense. My baby is never fussy." Wooyoung scoffed. He followed Hongjoong back into his studio, sitting down on the couch with Hwayeon in his lap. Even if he acted playful, Wooyoung was also very attentive and careful when it came to caring for Hwayeon, as well as her growth and development.

"Mmmmm." Hwayeon whined, tired of Wooyoung's hold on her. Hongjoong smirked proudly and moved Hwayeon onto his lap, rubbing her back to soothe her.

"There, there, melody." He kissed the top of her head. But Hwayeon was restless.

"What's wrong, melody? Hmm?" Hongjoong asked her.

"Baby, shall we go find the other samchons?" Wooyoung sat forward, offering to help Hongjoong with the fussy child. Hwayeon peeked an eye open to look at Wooyoung, seemingly interested.

"Hwa's coming to get her soon before my meeting with Maddox." Hongjoong informed.

"I heard the baby bear was here?" Jongho poked his head in.

"Look who it is, melody. Jongho samchon." Hongjoong patted Hwayeon's back to try and get her excited but Hwayeon was just not in a social mood. She buried her face into her father's chest, as if wanting to hide from everyone.

"It's okay. Did she just wake up?" Jongho asked, stroking Hwayeon's back to comfort her. Hongjoong nodded in confirmation, still trying to settle Hwayeon.

"Alright, alright." Hongjoong stood up, walking around the place. Wooyoung took a video.

"I'm sending this to (y/n)." Wooyoung giggled.

"Send it to our group chat." Jongho leaned in. Hongjoong leaned in to see Wooyoung's phone, realising that there was a group chat with a title he has never heard of.

"Wait, are you guys in a group chat with my wife, without me?" Hongjoong's eyes widened as he paced with Hwayeon.

"Yeah, there are multiple." Wooyoung admitted with a shrug. Jongho punched his shoulder.

"Multiple?!" Hongjoong tried not to yell. He didn't want to scare Hwayeon.

"They're just group chats, captain. There's one with me, Seonghwa hyung and (y/n). Then there's one with all of us and her, without you. That's the most active one." Wooyoung tried to remember off the top of his head. He enjoyed seeing Hongjoong annoyed while Jongho sighed with a shake of his head.

"You're gonna hate this even more. There's one with her, San and Yunho called '(y/n)'s favourites'. The rest of us have been trying to get into that chat forever." Wooyoung smirked.

"That... is true. It is highly coveted to get in. Yeosang hyung was a temporary member before." Jongho conceeded and nodded glumly.

"If Hwayeon wasn't here now..." Hongjoong threatened.

"Yeah, (y/n) said no cursing around baby, hyung." Wooyoung teased. Jongho laughed. Hwayeon was soon soothed, leaning on her father's shoulder but clutching his shirt.

"Is this... normal for her?" Jongho asked with worry, gesturing to Hwayeon's behaviour.

"Separation anxiety starts around 18 months so that's about now. Plus she just woke up not too long ago. It's normal." Hongjoong said.

"Ah, well I've got to go for dance. I'll see you at dinner, baby." Wooyoung kissed Hwayeon's hand. Despite clinging to her father, Hwayeon still managed to shoot Wooyoung a tiny wave, making the male coo and wave back at her.

"Alright, I'm here. Hi, my love." Seonghwa entered the studio. He stopped when he saw her clutching tightly onto Hongjoong's shirt as the captain paced along his studio.

"Separation anxiety." Jongho explained. Seonghwa nodded, you have told him about this before.

"She was like this when Mingi dropped her off too. I think it's hard on her with all the goodbyes." Hongjoong said.

"Aww, my sweet love" Seonghwa pouted and kissed Hwayeon's head. She lifted her head and looked at Seonghwa, who smiled softly at her. She babbled at him, as if greeting him.

"Hi~" He smiled.

"Stay with Hwa for a bit, okay melody? I'll come pick you later." Hongjoong said, starting to peel Hwayeon off him.

"Euh..." Hwayeon began to whine, clutching onto Hongjoong tightly when Seonghwa tried to take Hwayeon. Hongjoong had to gently remove Hwayeon's grip on him, making her burst into tears. Seonghwa held onto her in case she fell from his hold but it broke Hongjoong's heart to see her reach out for him.

"I can't. I'm sorry, melody." Hongjoong took Hwayeon back into his arms but she was inconsolable.

"Sorry, Jong. Why don't you go ahead with Maddox? Tell him I'll reschedule and catch up with him later." Hongjoong frowned slightly, starting to feel stressed.

"Sure, hyung. Don't worry about it." Jongho sent a small smile and left the studio.

"Shh, shh, melody. It's okay, it's okay. My sweet melody." Hongjoong held Hwayeon as she continued to wail.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry." Hongjoong continued to bounce Hwayeon in his arms to soothe her. It made his chest ache at how Hwayeon cried and how he didn't know what to do.

Seonghwa watched Hwayeon cry, feeling his heart break as well. He wanted to help Hongjoong but he didn't want to overstep and make Hongjoong more stress or even risk making Hwayeon more stressed. But also, he didn't really know what to do.

"Appa is here, melody. Papa Hwa is here too, it's okay." Hongjoong said. Seonghwa took that as his cue.

"Oh, my love, see? It's papa Hwa." Seonghwa said, stroking Hwayeon's hair back as it stuck to her forehead from the sweat. He wiped the tears from her face.

"My sweet melody." Hongjoong kissed her temple, feeling her calm down. Her cries reduced to soft sniffles and heavy breathing.

"Here, my love." Seonghwa held the waterbottle out to Hwayeon and she sipped from the straw.

"Good girl." He smiled softly. Even with Hwayeon calmed down, Seonghwa didn't attempt to move Hwayeon to his hold, both her and Hongjoong needed to calm each other down.

"Papa." Hwayeon grasped Seonghwa's hand.

"Take 5." Seonghwa squeezed Hongjoong's shoulder as Hwayeon moved into his hold. As Seonghwa moved out of the studio to let some fresh air in, he walked up and down the hallway with Hwayeon in his arms. From the corner of his eye, he watched Hongjoong bury his head in his hands.

"Love, look at papa." Seonghwa said and Hwayeon lifted her head to look at him. He pressed his hand to Hwayeon's forehead, letting out a sigh of relief. At least she didn't cry herself sick.

"Come on." He brought her to the bathroom to wipe her face and to cool her face down.

"Oh, that's cold! So cold~" Seonghwa playfully pressed the cold towel to her cheeks, making her cackle and squirm.

"Let's go find your appa." He put her down and she walked in front of Seonghwa, somehow knowing the way to her father's studio.

Seonghwa saw the red rimming Hongjoong's eyes, evidence that the captain shed some tears of his own. It would have been stressful for anyone, having your kid wail and cry for nearly 30 minutes.

"Good?" Seonghwa asked.

"Yeah, thanks." Hongjoong took a deep breath. He would always put a smile on for Hwayeon. She toddled forward, holding her father's calves, as he stayed seated on the couch, and burying her face against his knees.

"You were overwhelmed, hmm? It's okay. Me too." Hongjoong smiled softly, carrying Hwayeon onto his lap. Seonghwa went to fix a snack plate for both father and daughter.

"There we go." Seonghwa placed the fork into Hwayeon's hand to train her to feed herself using utensils.

"No, my love. Like this... I swear you're gonna hold your fork like your father." Seonghwa sighed.

"Hey!" Hongjoong exclaimed, offended.

"Your studio is soundproof but I swear I could hear bun crying from next door." Mingi poked his head in. He bent down in front of Hwayeon, giving her a little wave.

"She had a little moment just now. But it's all good." Hongjoong spoke softly. Mingi nodded with a small hum.

"Hey, bun. Told you I'll be back." He tapped her cheek, making her squirm shyly. Hongjoong guided Hwayeon's hand to stab a piece of banana and she clumsily brought it to her mouth. When she successfully put it in her mouth, all 3 adults present cheered and clapped for her.

"My bun is a genius." Mingi praised. Hwayeon smiled, happily soaking in all the attention and praised.

"Papa." Hwayeon grasped one of her vegetable crackers, holding it out to Seonghwa like she did with Mingi earlier. Seonghwa gladly ate the cracker, stroking her head.

"Thank you, love. You're so kind." He grinned.

"What about me, bun?" Mingi pointed to himself. Hwayeon grinned and grabbed one, putting it against Mingi's lips.

"Yah! Stop stealing my daughter's snacks." Hongjoong scolded, using his fingers to push Mingi's forehead until he fell down from his squatting position.

"Hyung, no violence around bun." Mingi wagged his finger.

"Bun!" Hwayeon exclaimed, raising her fork in the air. Seonghwa, Hongjoong and Mingi stared at each other with wide eyes. Even though Hwayeon had said her first words and could say simple words, that was the first time she said 'bun'.

"That's right... You're my bun..." Mingi smiled softly as he felt tears start to form in his eyes. Seonghwa held Hwayeon's plate and Hongjoong put her down on the ground.

"Go give Mingi samchon a hug." Seonghwa whispered. Hwayeon giggled and toddled forward, falling into Mingi's arms.

"Bun!" Hwayeon giggled as Mingi wrapped his long arms around Hwayeon.

"The power melody holds over all of you." Hongjoong shook his head with a laugh and went to sit in his chair.

"Don't say it like you aren't one of us." Seonghwa rolled his eyes. With Hwayeon in a much better mood, Seonghwa and Mingi were able to lead her away for Hongjoong to get some work done.

"Look who is okay and happy." Wooyoung came over, cooing.

"You guys have a little bit of time to play before her second nap." Seonghwa said.

They went back to the artists' lounge to play with Hwayeon. And of course, Yunho made sure that there is a box of Hwayeon's toys kept there. They did simple puzzles and played with blocks. Only when Wooyoung noticed that Hwayeon was showing signs of being tired, he read a story to her.

"Let me set up a place for her to sleep." Seonghwa said and Mingi helped him. Hwayeon comfortably settled in Wooyoung's lap as he read to her.

"We should put her on the couch. It's the softest, even if we put floor mats down." Mingi told Seonghwa.

"Uh, I think that won't be necessary anymore." Wooyoung said softly.

"She's asleep?" Seonghwa asked. Wooyoung leaned down slightly to check and saw Hwayeon fast asleep, clutching onto her stuffed puppy. He hadn't even made it to the middle of the book.

"Just leave her like this, hyung." Wooyoung told Seonghwa. Mingi draped a blanket over her.

"Hey, guys-"

"SHHHH!" Seonghwa, Mingi and Wooyoung scolded San, who was taken aback at the sudden reaction. That was when Wooyoung pointed to the sleeping Hwayeon in his hold.

"Oh, sorry." San apologised. One by one, the other Ateez boys came to join, except Hongjoong, sitting together in the dark and eventually falling asleep. Even though he was asleep, whenever Wooyoung felt Hwayeon stir, he would pat her back to soothe her back to sleep.

So imagine Hongjoong's surprise when he came to look for everyone and found his members fast asleep, but in places around his daughter, as if protecting her.

'Look at them.'

Hongjoong took a picture and sent it to you. Just as he sent it to you, Hwayeon whined and woke up.

"Hi, melody. Did you have a good nap?" Hongjoong went to take her from Wooyoung's hold, hugging her to let her wake up.

"Yah, everyone. Wake up." Hongjoong said to the rest, turning on the lights as he went to the bathroom to change Hwayeon's diaper. He could hear the 7 groan at the bright light.

"Your silly samchons." Hongjoong chuckled. Hwayeon didn't understand but smiled, seeing her father laugh.

"Kim Hwayeon, why are you so cute? Hmm? Why are you so cute?" He cooed in a baby voice and tickled her, making her squeal with laughter. After putting her down, he washed his hands and walked with her back to the lounge. Jongho lifted Hwayeon up, raising her in the air, sending her into another round of laughter.

"Baby bear~" Jongho spun around and held her on his hip.

"You guys were supposed to be watching her. Not sleeping." Hongjoong scoffed, rolling his eyes. He showed them all the photo he took to send you.

"Aww, that's a cute photo though." Yunho giggled. Hongjoong checked his watch.

"It's a little early for dinner..." He thought out loud.

"It's okay, Hongjoong ah. I'm sure we can all eat now. Besides, little one should eat early and sleep early." Seonghwa said. The other boys nodded in agreement.

"What are we eating?" Yeosang asked.

"We should eat baeksuk. Hwayeon will like it and it's better for her." Wooyoung suggested, still mostly paying attention to San playing 'airplane' with Hwayeon.

"Okay, let's go everyone." Hongjoong clapped his hands. However, no one moved, too busy playing with Hwayeon to listen to the captain. Hongjoong let out a tired sigh of despair, marching forward and taking Hwayeon away.

"I'm confiscating melody! Since no one is listening to me." He glared at the boys who jeered back at him.

"Aww, party pooper." Jongho gave a thumbs down. Hongjoong rolled his eyes and ushered everyone downstairs. He put Hwayeon in her car seat.

"I can take one person in the back seat with melody and one person in the passenger seat. The rest, take the van." Hongjoong said.

"Ack! Hyung, no shoving!" Wooyoung yelled as Seonghwa shoved him and ran forward.

"Mingi?" Seonghwa blinked, surprised to see Mingi already in the backseat, playing with Hwayeon when he opened the door. Hwayeon was busy babbling at Mingi.

"You snooze you lose. I was already here the moment Hongjoong hyung put bun in her car seat." Mingi shrugged. Seonghwa sulked and sat in the passenger seat. He obviously wants to sit with his god daughter and 'being in the same car' is not enough fro him. The two watched the other members climb into the van.

"Okay, let's go. Ready, melody?" Hongjoong asked as he sat in the driver's seat and buckled his seatbelt.

"Ouh!" She cheered, raising her fists up, and Mingi copied her in cheering. She gave him a toothy grin, making Mingi melt.

"Why are you so cute, bun? Hmm? Why?" He lifted her stuffed puppy, playfully waving it around. Hwayeon let out a loud laugh and wrapped both arms around her puppy.

"She really loves that thing, wouldn't let (y/n) take it away to be washed..." Hongjoong chuckled.

"It's definitely seen better days." Seonghwa laughed.

"Pup-py. (멍멍이)" Mingi tapped the puppy's head. Hwayeon stopped hugging it, holding it an arm's length away to look at it. Mingi repeated the word again.

"Meo... meo-i." She tried her best to pronounce the word. It wasn't the most accurate but it was good enough for Mingi and the other two in the car. Seonghwa and Mingi clapped for Hwayeon and she clapped too.

"What a smart bun." Mingi cooed.

"You're never going to stop calling her bun, aren't you?" Hongjoong scoffed, shaking his head.

"Until the day I die~" Mingi replied, still playing with Hwayeon, letting her play with his rings. Hongjoong and you didn't only conceive your daughter but you conceived Ateez's daughter.

"Please don't talk about dying in front of her..." Seonghwa sighed.

"Why? Death is normal and inevitable." Mingi blinked in confusion, resulting in Seonghwa facepalming.

"Okay, we're here." Hongjoong pulled into the parking space. But as he was going to come out, Yeosang closed his door, trapping him in the car.

"Come on, baby." Wooyoung stole Hwayeon out of her carseat and brought her to the restaurant. They could hear Hongjoong yelling.

"Let him out, Yeo!" Wooyoung said once they were practically in the shop. Yeosang moved away and Hongjoong came out, yelling at the boys in disbelief. Hwayeon just blinked, tilting her head as she stared at Hongjoong lecturing and scolding the boys for trapping him in the car, stealing her and leaving him behind.

Hwayeon's bottom lip trembled before she burst out crying, burying her face in Wooyoung's chest, shocking all the boys and making Hongjoong stop his scolding.

"No, no, my love. He's not scolding you. It's okay. Come to papa." Seonghwa took Hwayeon into his arms to comfort her.

"Yah, look what you did, hyung!" Yunho frowned. Hongjoong gulped as he faced Hwayeon's angry uncles.

"If you guys didn't play around-"

"You scared bun!" Mingi pouted, seeing Seonghwa bringing Hwayeon outside to comfort her. Also, so her crying doesn't disrupt the other diners in the place.

"Ah, just go get the table." Hongjoong sighed, pinching his nose bridge as he went outside.

"I'm sorry, melody. I wasn't scolding you... Appa was too scary, right? I'm sorry." Hongjoong gently placed a hand on Hwayeon's back. Hongjoong gestured to Seonghwa to move Hwayeon to him. The taller male nodded and lifted Hwayeon off his shoulder.

"There we go. I'm so sorry, melody. I wasn't scolding you. You're a good girl, my sweet melody." Hongjoong put his hand on her head, guiding her to rest her head on his shoulder.

"I'll go in first." Seonghwa said softly. Hongjoong hummed.

"Appa..." She grabbed the material of Hongjoong's shirt in her fist. Hongjong hushed her, swaying from side to side.

"I'm right here, melody." Hongjoong whispered, turning his head to kiss her temple.

After Hwayeon calmed down and Hongjoong was sure she was okay, he brought her into the restaurant. He ignored the guilt that made his chest tighten.

"Baby bear." Jongho smiled as Hongjoong sat down with Hwayeon in his lap. Now, she just wanted to be as close to her father as possible.

"We've ordered for everyone already, hyung. So don't worry about it." Yunho said. Hongjoong nodded, still rubbing Hwayeon's back. San poured him a cup of cold tea. Everyone could see the mental and emotional exhaustion on Hongjoong's face so they all wanted to help him with even the small things.

"Here is the food." The servers brought the bowls of hot chicken soup and rice. Seonghwa portioned out some soup and added half a bowl of rice, tearing some chicken into it.

"I'll put it here to let it cool." He said.

"Thanks, Seonghwa ah. Look melody, yummy food." Hongjoong pointed and Hwayeon sat up.

"Mam mam?" She looked up at her dad, who nodded with a smile, smoothing her hair back. After touching the spoon to his lip to check the temperature, he fed Hwayeon.

"Aigo, my love eats so well." Seonghwa cooed. Wanting more praise from her uncles, Hwayeon took another mouthful.

"You like this, melody?" Hongjoong asked and Hwayeon nodded her head. He smiled and wiped her mouth.

"One spoon for melody. And one spoon for appa." He chuckled, watching how Hwayeon looked up at Hongjoong as he took his bite of food. She giggled, watching her father eat. Hongjoong was unaware of San videoing the moment.

"I'm going to send this to (y/n)." San whispered to Yunho.

"Mmm, send it in our group chat." Yunho leaned over to reply. Hongjoong watched Hwayeon eat her portion and even asked for more, he was happy to see her eat.

"You really love this, hmm? You're eating so well, melody." Hongjoong said, giving her the final spoonful.

After dinner, everyone returned back to the dorms since Hwayeon sleeps early. Seonghwa followed Hongjoong to help him.

"I'll run the water." Seonghwa said and ran to the bathroom to get Hwayeon's bath started. Hongjoong removed Hwayeon's shoes and undressed her.

"Bath time~" Hongjoong sang. Thankfully, Hwayeon was fine with baths since there were toys.

With Hwayeon in a good mood after her bath, Seonghwa took over in dressing her and getting her ready for bed while Hongjoong went to take a shower. Because there was no way he would be able to without someone watching Hwayeon, he would be too paranoid that something happens to her.

"Thanks for all your help today, Seonghwa. And all the boys too, wouldn't have been able to do it myself." Hongjoong said as he emerged, towel drying his hair.

"No need to thank us. We're always more than happy to be around Hwayeon. Besides, we wouldn't have left you all by yourself."

"It's not easy, I wonder how (y/n) does it on her own." Hongjoong fell onto the couch.

"Mothers are heroes, that's how. And (y/n)'s pretty amazing, she's a great mother." Seonghwa said, playing with Hwayeon who was perched in his lap.

"She is..." Hongjoong smiled softly.

"I think I'll work for home tomorrow or even take the day off to stay in. Spend some time with melody." He told his best friend.

"That's a good idea. Maybe we'll drop by for a meal. Or if you just need something, let any of us know." Seonghwa said and moved Hwayeon to stand up so he could stand up to leave. He leaned down to give Hwayeon a kiss on the cheek.

"Goodnight, my love." He smiled and waved to her.

"Thanks again, Seonghwa ah." Hongjoong waved and Seonghwa nodded before leaving to head to his dorm upstairs.

"Alright, time for bed, melody." Hongjoong brought Hwayeon to the room to start to put her to bed. He laid beside her in her bed until she fell asleep.

"You must have been tired, hmm?" He whispered, seeing as to how Hwayeon she fell asleep so fast.

"I love you." He kissed her forehead and left the room. Entering your shared bedroom, the first thing he did was text then call you.

"Hi, Joong." You came into view, leaning against the head board of your hotel bed. Just seeing your face and hearing your voice call his name, Hongjoong felt tears well up in his eyes. He covered his eyes with his hand as he let out a shaky breath. Your eyebrows furrowed as you registered the fact that he was crying.

"Joong? Are you okay? What's wrong? What happened?" Worry was evident in your voice as you sat up in your bed. Hongjoong reached for a tissue to wipe his tears.

"Nothing happened... I just... Gosh, I miss you so much, baby. And I'm sorry for all the time I've taken you for granted." He rambled.

"Taking me for granted? Where is all this coming from, Joong? I've never once felt that you've taken me for granted."

"It's not easy taking care of melody on my own. I don't know how you do it but I now know it's not easy. I feel so guilty, I did so many things wrong today." He shook his head.

"Ah, so that's where this is coming from. Tell me what happened." You spoke patiently and gently.

"I don't even know where to begin..." Hongjoong sighed but began to tell you all the events of today. You listened and didn't interrupt.

Hongjoong was a soft hearted, sensitive soul. He seems fierced and strict as a rapper and the captain of Ateez. But you knew him as Kim Hongjoong, the one who feels guilty easily and always wants to do his best for others.

"Joong, listen to me. I wasn't perfect from the start and probably never will be but that's okay. I'm still learning about this whole parenting thing too." You smiled softly.

"It's okay to make mistakes. I make mistakes too. And trust me, Hwayeon doesn't hate you. She still loves you deeply." You giggled.

"It broke my heart to see her cry so much. And twice in one day." Hongjoong pouted.

"It happens, we're her parents but we're humans too. And she had her wonderful appa there, her godfather and 6 goofy uncles. I'm sure she was fine after that." You said. Hongjoong nodded.

"I miss you, baby. So much." Hongjoong said.

"I miss you too, Joong. The bed feels cold and foreign without you here. And it's almost too quiet without Hwayeon." You shrugged.

"Just one more day and one more sleep, baby. We can do this, hmm?" He gave you a lopsided smile. You nodded, wanting nothing more than to hug Hongjoong. You knew he felt the same, he wanted to shower you in kisses. It was never this hard, being away from each other before Hwayeon was born.

"You're going to suffer when you go on tour." You commented with a chuckle. Hongjoong groaned softly, still hyperaware and listening out for the cries of Hwayeon.

"I'm just going to have to fly you both to every destination with us. Problem solved." He smiled victoriously.

"Well, I have to work but Hwayeon will be more than happy to go see her dad and uncles." You laughed and Hongjoong agreed.

"Won't you be excited to see us too?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Joong, our dating and married life has always consisted, and will probably continue to consist, of me being backstage with you and watching you on stage. If I wasn't excited about it, I wouldn't have went to every performance and concert you have." You pointed out with a chuckle.

"That's why I love you." He grinned.

"I love you too." You said. Reluctantly, you and Hongjoong had to end the call because Hwayeon started fussing and Hongjoong needed to attend to her.

"Shh, shh, melody." He whispered as he lulled her back to sleep. Although you wanted to see Hwayeon, you were worried that your voice and/or your face would remind her of you and make her cry.

"You miss her? I miss her too." Hongjoong spoke to his sleeping child, smiling endearingly at her.

"Thank you for being patient with me." He added as he laid down beside her.

Hongjoong was glad you both decided against an actual bed for Hwayeon. You had those soft mattress pads with two futons put over so you and Hongjoong could sleep with her comfortably.

"Sweet melody." Like the night before, Hongjoong patted Hwayeon's back to keep her asleep, until he too fell asleep, exhausted from the day before. Hwayeon ended up scooting close to her father, pressing herself against his chest.

It was a good decision to stay in because Hwayeon was extra clingy to Hongjoong from the moment they woke up.

"Are you hungry?" Hongjoong asked. He felt Hwayeon nod her head but still hold onto his shirt. Even when he was working, she wanted to sit on his lap.

"Alright, you can walk beside me." He placed her down. Hwayeon held her father's hand.

"Want this?" Hongjoong held the bag of granola bites.

"Eung!" She nodded. He gave her that with some fruits and yoghurt. The father and daughter love yoghurt. Adjusting her on his lap, Hongjoong put the spoon in Hwayeon's hand.

"Eat up, melody." He smiled, watching her try to feed herself. Hongjoong leaned back slightly to text Seonghwa. He updated him on how Hwayeon was and that all the boys shouldn't come over since it may overwhelm her like yesterday. The only person that Hwayeon might be okay would be Seonghwa.

"Papa Hwa's coming over, okay melody?" Hongjoong tucked his daughter's hair behind her ears. Hwayeon actually nodded.

"Papa!" She raised her spoon with a smile. Hongjoong couldn't help but laugh, finding his daughter absolutely adorable. He would gladly be the number 1 fool for her.

"Why are you so cute, Kim Hwayeon?" He playfully pretended to bite her, making her squeal in laughter.

"Appa, noooooo!" She giggled, holding Hongjoong's cheeks.

DING DONG

"Papa?" Hwayeon tilted her head. Holding her in his arms, Hongjoong went to open the door to let Seonghwa in. Thankfully, Hwayeon willing went into Seonghwa's arms.

"Good morning, my love." Seonghwa smiled as he showered her in kisses.

"Hold her. I've needed to use the bathroom for the longest time!" Hongjoong ran to the bathroom. Seonghwa laughed, shaking his head. Holding Hwayeon at his hip, Seonghwa cleared up her empty yoghurt bowl and wiped the table.

"Mmm, yeah." Seonghwa nodded along to whatever Hwayeon was babbling about, which was a mix of short words she knew and made up gibberish.

"She's always so talkative with you, ever since birth." Hongjoong said as he came back.

"Especially when she was 3 months old." Seonghwa chuckled. He sat down at the dining table with Hwayeon in his lap.

"I made Hwayeon some soup and food so we can just order for ourselves." Seonghwa said, nodding over to the food containers he brought down with him.

"Okay. You're so lucky, melody." Hongjoong tapped Hwayeon's nose. They sent the order in for their lunch.

"Since I only have you here for lunch, distract her while I finish up chores." Hongjoong said. He wanted to do the laundry and clear up the house as much as he could so you wouldn't have to do it when you come back, he knew you would be tired from travelling and having to unpack.

"Uh, do you want me to help with the cleaning instead?" Seonghwa raised an eyebrow. Having lived with Hongjoong and sharing a room with him, he knew Hongjoong's cleaning skills...

"I can do it. Believe it or not, I'm good at cleaning now." Hongjoong rolled his eyes. And just as he put a load of laundry in, the food came.

"Lunch time!" Seonghwa lifted Hwayeon up from where she was sitting with her toys.

"Hands." He instructed and helped her wash her hands.

"Be careful, my love." Seonghwa supported her butt as Hwayeon tried to climb into her high chair herself. But she still couldn't really get her leg over the table top so Seonghwa helped her.

"Appa~" Hwayeon whined when she realised she was alone, Seonghwa having left momentarily to get cutlery.

"I'm right here, melody." Hongjoong came to the table, tapping her cheek. He unwrapped all the food, laying it out on the table. Seonghwa put Hwayeon's bib on and placed the plate of what he cooked fro her.

"Alright, melody. Here you go." Hongjoong placed the spoon in her hand. She was content, with her dad on her left and her godfather on her right.

"Mmm, is it yummy, my love?" Seonghwa smiled, watching Hwayeon feed herself.

"Yum!" She cheered.

"Good girl, eat your vegetables, unlike someone..." Seonghwa cleared his throat, raising his eyebrows at Hwayeon's father, who was picking the vegetables out of his rice.

"What?" Hongjoong blinked. Seonghwa shook his head with a soft sigh, turning his attention back to Hwayeon.

"Let me help you, melody." Scraping the last few bites on her plate, Hongjoong fed them to Hwayeon.

"Want more?" Seonghwa asked. Surprisingly, Hwayeon nodded her head. Seonghwa stood up to get her more rice, putting the remaining soup into the bowl. He shredded the last piece of chicken that he cooked for her and mixed it into the rice and soup. Hwayeon kicked her feet happily when she saw more food.

"Your appetite is so much better today, my love." Seonghwa stroked her head.

"I think she's just happy to sit and eat with us now." Hongjoong smiled dreamily at his daughter. Watching Hwayeon eat always made him feel so full.

"To think, it feels like just yesterday I found out our baby was going to be a girl." Hongjoong said fondly.

"Don't start crying." Seonghwa chuckled.

"I already want the cry at the thought of her and boys one day. If I could, she'll never get to be around any boys. You don't need any boys, don't you, melody?" Hongjoong cooed.

"Eung!" Hwayeon nodded, even if she didn't understand what her dad was saying to her. Hongjoong laughed, nodding in approval.

"None of us accept any boys that's less than perfection for our princess." Seonghwa scoffed. He didn't like the idea of his 'one, true love' potentially having a boyfriend and even getting married one day. That'll be his death day.

"See? You're thinking about it." Hongjoong burst out laughing, seeing the deep frown on Seonghwa's face and the defensiveness that was evident in his posture.

"I'll take her and run away before she can start dating." Seonghwa said.

"You're worse than me." Hongjoong scoffed. Hwayeon looked between her father and godfather, waving her spoon happily.

After lunch, Hongjoong cleared up the area and did the dishes while Seonghwa played with Hwayeon. They did some reading, knowing that Hwayeon would have her first nap soon.

"Hwa, you can go if you need to. I'll take over." Hongjoong said from the kitchen.

"I'll wait for her to fall asleep then leave." Seonghwa replied, looking down to see Hwayeon yawning and rubbing her eyes.

When Hwayeon was showing signs of sleepiness, Hongjoong came to cradle her to sleep. She still sleeps best with her father so she fell asleep in his arms quickly. Hongjoong carefully moved to her room to place her down in her bed and Seonghwa gave her a kiss on the head before he left.

However, Hwayeon didn't stay asleep for long, starting to fuss and whine. So, Hongjoong stopped doing his chores and stayed with her, laying beside her.

"Shh, shh..." He rubbed her back to soothe her, knowing she was still tired and needed to nap more.

"Mama..." She whimpered in her sleep. It dawned on Hongjoong that Hwayeon's fussiness could be attributed to her missing you but not realising or understanding it. He looked down at his sleeping child.

"She'll come home to us tomorrow." He whispered, closing his eyes to rest with Hwayeon.

"Joong?" You pushed open the door.

After finishing your part of the conference, you told your boss you wouldn't stay on and wanted to come home. Luckily, your boss understood and let you leave early.

"Baby? Joong?" You left your luggage in the living room and went around looking for your family. There was a possibility that they were out. But when you pushed open Hwayeon's room door, you saw the two laying together in Hwayeon's bed.

"Mama...?" Hwayeon sat up, evidently awake while her father was asleep. You smiled and crept over to pick her up.

"Hi there. Oh, I missed you so much, my baby." You hugged her. You moved out of the room so you wouldn't disturb Hongjoong. Hwayeon buried her face in your chest.

"My good girl." You patted her back.

"Were you a good girl for appa and samchons?" You giggled. Inhaling her scent really comforted you.

"Hold on." You put Hwayeon down just go lay a blanket over Hongjoong's sleeping figure. Right after that, Hwayeon climbed into your arms again.

"Appa brought you to play with papa and samchons, huh?" You spoke to Hwayeon, who listened and babbled back.

When Hongjoong woke up, he noticed Hwayeon wasn't in the room with him. Panic shot through him as he heard rumaging outside. He was worried Hwayeon would hurt herself. Jumping to his feet, he rushed out of the room. But he froze in his tracks. There you were, standing in the kitchen with Hwayeon at your hip.

"Oh! Look who it is." You smiled, talking to Hwayeon.

"Appa!" Hwayeon grinned. You laughed and nodded. Hongjoong rubbed his eyes, he was dreaming, right? Because you were only supposed to be back tomorrow.

"You're not dreaming, Joong. I'm back a day early." You chuckled, knowing exactly what your husband was thinking.

"Here you go, baby." You put Hwayeon in her highway, giving her a small bowl of her crackers.

"Joong, I-" You were interrupted by Hongjoong engulfing you in a big hug. Now, Hongjoong's scent was home. You felt his face pressed against your shoulder.

"I missed you too, Joong." You spoke softly.

That was when you felt the dampness on your shoulder. Hongjoong often makes fun of you, saying you're his baby before Hwayeon is. But there were times when Hongjoong was like your son before Hwayeon was your daughter.

"Please don't ever leave me again." He cried. As much as you wanted to comfort him, you couldn't help but snort.

"Leave you? You were the one telling me to leave!" You exclaimed amidst your laughter.

"I know and I regret it." He sobbed. You knew that Hongjoong was really going through it so you stopped laughing at him and really comforted him.

"You did good, Joong. It's not easy doing it alone, hmm?" You patted his head.

"Not just that... I just missed you... I didn't like coming home and you not being there." He said in between his sobs, making you melt.

"Appa...?" You heard a whimper and looked up to see Hwayeon looking horrified at her father crying.

"Oh, no, no, no. My sweet baby girl. Appa is okay. Don't worry." With Hongjoong still stuck to your waist and refusing to let go, you shuffled over to pick Hwayeon up, balancing her on one arm while to other was still around Hongjoong. You sighed with a shake of your head, comforting your upset child and crying husband.

"It's okay, Hwayeon." You pressed kisses to her head to comfort her since you couldn't use your other hand to soothe her.

"You both... seriously..." You sighed with a shake of your head. Hongjoong lifted his head, cupping your cheeks and pulling you in for a deep kiss.

"Excuse me, your daughter is right here!" You slapped his arm. Hongjoong just hugged you again.

"I'm taking you both with me on tour. No negotiations." Hongjoong declared.

"Joong, no." You sent him a flat look.

"But baby~" He whined. You have been with him long enough to not be swayed by his whining anymore. Once Hwayeon was calm again, you set her down on her high chair to continue eating.

"Think about it. It'll be good for melody too, she can travel and experience things overseas. And she won't forget me." Hongjoong said as he pulled you onto his lap so you could both sit with Hwayeon as she ate. You sat across his lap, legs dangling on his side.

"She won't forget you, drama queen." You scoffed, slinging an arm around his shoulders as he leaned his head against your chest.

"Please~" He whined.

"Stop that, I don't want Hwayeon picking up on your whining." You scolded. Hongjoong pouted at you with a small frown, his last resort was always a tantrum.

"No promises but I'll think about it, okay? Let me speak with her paediatrician and stuff." You gave in.

"Okay!" He smiled, pressing a kiss to your cheek, his arms tightening around your waist.

"So, what did the two of you get up to while I wasn't around?" You asked, smiling at Hwayeon, who smiled back at you, her cheeks puffed slightly from the snacks she was eating.

"The usual, her ruling KQ like the princess she is. Her uncles and godfather spoil her too much." Hongjoong clicked his tongue.

"Coming from you?" You raised an eyebrow.

"She's a mini you, she was literally born for me to spoil. That's different." Hongjoong reasoned, rolling his eyes. You laughed, Hongjoong and Ateez would always be fools for Hwayeon, she'll never know the power she has over the 8. She'll always be Ateez's daughter, princess, baby, love and bun.

"You guys are unbelieveable. I can't believe she has all of you wrapped around her finger and she's not even 2. So much for pirate kings." You snorted in disbelief.

"Oh, please. We knew we were doomed to moment we found out our baby was going to be a girl." Hongjoong stated.

"Well, I'm glad you all had fun and bonded more. She's one lucky girl." You giggled.

"Mhmm. I think melody had fun too. But baby, I wanted to ask you something I learnt about. What's this about a group chat called '(y/n)'s favourites'? And why am I not in it?" Hongjoong finally asked.

"Ah... About that..." All you could do was send him a sheepish smile.

~

Masterlist