#ohhh why isn't it next week already

[summerfullofsnow]

oohhh the timelines... the timelines are converging...

[ckret2]

Chapter 77 of human Bill Cipher being a prisoner with terrible fashion sense: beach episode!!! Well, lake episode. Close enough.

And a few other people come to town.

Just after dawn, a sleek, nondescript black government SUV, now dusty from a long drive, parked in front of the Gravity Falls Police Department. Three agents in sleek, nondescript black suits stepped out.

As they left the car, Blubs came out to meet them, Durland trailing behind him. "Agent Powers, Agent Trigger! Good to see you again." He shook Powers's hand, then glanced at the new agent. "And you are...?"

"Agent Dale!" The rookie shook Blubs's hand next, beaming. "Very pleased to meet you. I was just saying in the car—you have a beautiful town here, just beautiful."

"Wouldn't stop talking about it," Trigger muttered.

Blubs chuckled. "Why, thank you. We're quite proud of it ourselves."

Durland said, "Say, Agent Dale—don't you agents usually have tougher-sounding codenames?"

"Agent Clyde S. Dale. Like the horse."

"Ohhh. Yup, that'll do it."

"Sheriff Blubs," Powers said. "I trust you have the requested materials?"

"Right inside," Blubs said. "We've got the readings on last week's gravity anomaly from McGucket's scanners, and reports on this weekend's power surge."

"No overlap between the incidents?"

"None anyone here detected."

"Hmm. Has anything else strange happened since we were last in town?"

Blubs hesitated. "Well—never mind all that." He quickly shifted topics, "Say, I like your 'honk if you want to be arrested' bumper sticker." ("Oh is that what it says?" Durland asked.)

Agent Powers said solemnly, "I can get you the contact information of the shop where I bought it. It's a very nice small business run by art students."

"Would you? That'd be delightful."

Powers paused before following the cops and his agents into the police department, glancing out at Gravity Falls' town square—the modest little main street shops, the town hall, the statue of the town founder, the distinctive water tower with the faded muffin graffiti, and the familiar mountains surrounding the little valley town.

And then he let out a long, frustrated sigh.

"Fine," he muttered grumpily, glaring at the town as though it were an old rival as annoyed to see him as he was to see it. "Let's just get this over with."

He followed Blubs into the police department.

####

"Attention, everybody," Stan said, standing in the entryway with his fists on his hips, Soos beaming behind him. "I've got some great news!"

Abuelita and Bill glanced up from one of Abuelita's soap operas; Mabel and Dipper craned their necks to see Stan from where they were having dinner at the kitchen table.

Stan announced, "It's finally time!"

Dipper and Mabel blinked. Bill said, "Great. I'll get the ritual daggers, you can set up the blood red candles. Dolores?"

Abuelita said, "I will put out the good sacrifice altar." Bill laughed in delight.

"Yeah, yuck it up, you two," Stan said. "We're going fishing tomorrow! I've got the bait, I found everyone's rods, Soos and I patched up the old boat, I even—" He paused at the sound of the vending machine opening. "Hey! Ford!"

Ford ducked in from the gift shop. "What?" 

Stan chucked a hat at him. "I made you a fishing buddy hat! See, it's got your name! That's pretty good!"

"Oh." Ford inspected the letters haphazardly stitched onto the hat. "Why?"

"Fishing tomorrow! Half the summer's gone by, and we haven't gone fishing once! The guys from the lodge probably think I'm too ashamed to show my face. But it rained this weekend, the weather's just cleared up, now's the perfect time for fishing!"

"Oh," Ford said again, trying to drag his thoughts from magical tapes to fishing. "If you'd let me know earlier, I'd have built another fish-summoning beacon like the one on our boat." (Bill glanced curiously at Ford at the mention of an invention he didn't already know about; then stubbornly refused to be interested and dragged his gaze back to the TV.)

"No beacons! This isn't fishing for survival, this is about the sport! Asserting our manhood! Just the skill, strength, and patience of three men—and some women and children—against the lake!" (Soos beamed at being included amongst the men.)

Ford considered that. He didn't assert his manhood very often; usually he just sort of let his manhood hang around minding its own business, like an old cat that wants to be in the same room as you without socializing. It sounded like an intriguingly novel experience. "Okay, great. What time?"

"I want everyone on the road tomorrow morning! By six thirty at the latest."

The kids groaned.

"C'mon, dudes," Soos said encouragingly. "It'll be fun! After about three hours, once you're awake enough to think."

"No griping, we've gotta be there early to get a prime fishing spot," Stan said. "Tomorrow's a lodge fishing day. We're going home with a haul so big they'll be embarrassed they kicked me out!"

Dipper asked, "You mean the lodge for the Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel, right? Why'd they kick you out?"

Stan sighed, "Once the town found out about Ford, they realized I'd spent the last thirty years attending lodge meetings under his membership. Since I'd never undergone the—" He rolled his eyes and made finger quotes, "'sacred angler initiation rites,' they booted me. And they said I can't try to join again, just because of that one dumb little white lie! And my extensive criminal record."

Ford hurriedly crossed the living room to avoid blocking Abuelita's TV view. (Bill looked through him like he wasn't there.) "Stan got a lot more out of my membership than I did—once I'd finished my initiation I probably only ever attended three meetings. I tried to petition the Mackerels to let him rejoin."

"How'd they respond?" Mabel asked.

"They kicked me out too."

Bill scoffed. "Big deal! The Fishmasons and all their subordinate organizations are just a big boring social club that got you hotel discounts three hundred years ago. The mystique around them is more interesting than anything they actually do."

"Figuring that out is why I stopped attending after three meetings," Ford said. "I joined to learn about the dark secret underbelly of Western politics—not sit around eating charcuterie and fancy nuts while everyone talks about baseball and makes fun of me for not knowing what a fly ball is. It's a stupid term! Doesn't the ball always fly?"

"Really, they aren't even worth joining," said Bill Cipher, the only person to have ever been kicked out of seventeen separate Masonic lodges in seventeen separate bodies.

Reminded of the fancy nuts he was missing out on at this very second, Stan set his jaw in determination. "Yeah, well, they're a big boring social club that'll rue the day they kicked out Stan Pines! Out the door, six thirty, on the dot!"

"I don't have an alarm," Bill said. "Hey star girl, wake me at five."

Mabel shuddered at the thought of setting an alarm that early. "No way. You can borrow my radio."

"Hold on, I didn't say you're invited," Stan said. "We've already got a full boat! Me, my brother, the kids, and Soos and his girl. Nobody wants to sit on the lake with you for eight hours."

"I wanna sit on the lake with Bill!"

"Nobody but Mabel wants that."

"Relax! I don't want to sit on a boat with you underpainted clowns either," Bill said. "I just want to sit on the beach! I miss sunlight! Sunlight without being forced to hike through half the valley on no food or sleep."

(Ford decided that was his cue to make himself scarce. He scooted into the guest room.)

"Well," Stan said, "we're not staying thirty feet from the shore, we're not leaving anybody behind, and we don't trust you to stay put on the beach without your dumb magic bracelet—so how do you expect that to work."

"I'll just stay with Dolores."

Stan and Soos stared at Abuelita. Soos said, "Abuelita? Do you want to come?"

Abuelita considered it. "Sure. The weather is nice. I can catch up on my reading."

"Yes!" Bill hopped off the couch. "Then it's a plan!"

"Hey, hold on," Stan said as Bill breezed past him, "I didn't agree to—"

"Hey star girl!" Bill leaned into the kitchen. "Need your fashion services! I need a swimsuit before tomorrow."

Mabel gasped in delight. "What kind?"

"Whatever exposes the most skin without getting me arrested. I'm absorbing as much sunlight as possible."

"With sunscreen, right?" Soos said.

Bill turned and gave him a blank-faced stare.

Soos hopefully repeated, "With sunscreen?"

"Don't need it."

"You totally do, dude. Not many people talk about this? But having more melanin doesn't totally protect you from sun damage, it just slows it down," Soos said. "Trust me on this. When I was like eight, I went to this water park—

"Uh-huh, and three days later you were peeling off flakes of your own dead flesh," Bill said. "It's cute how you think you know more about humans from 23 years of passively being one than I do from 500,000 years of actively studying them."

"Oh."

"C'mon, star girl! No time to waste!" Bill grabbed Mabel's hand and tugged her off her chair.

"Wait, my sandwich—!" Mabel grabbed the rest of her dinner off her plate and shoved it in her mouth as Bill dragged her upstairs.

Abuelita shot him a dirty look as he passed, but turned back to her soap opera.

####

Just past five in the morning, Bill crept by the guest room door. He glanced through the wall as he passed; good, both of the Stans were in bed and sound asleep. Bill wouldn't have had a chance to get up to his mischief if Ford had decided to sleep downstairs.

He snuck behind the vending machine; paused to squint toward the future and confirm that when he looked at the stairs, he could only see himself using them anytime soon; then down to the elevator; and down, down to Ford's study.

Bill sighed in relief when the elevator slid open and he saw that Ford had left his study door ajar. He crept into the room, feet socked, hands gloved—Ford was the kind of paranoid to actually check for prints if he suspected anything, and Bill's triangular whorls were very distinctive—and looked through the objects piled on the shelves and furniture for any concealed sensors or cameras. The coast was clear.

He idly scanned the nearby shelves for any sign of his stolen time tape, didn't find it, but didn't expect to. That wasn't what he was here for.

He knelt in front of a half-disassembled filing cabinet, flipped through the files in the removed bottom drawer until he found several folders together about curses and hexes, and flipped through them until he found the one labeled "Curses & Hexes (w/ ingredients)". Good old Sixer, left everything exactly where Bill remembered it.

He rifled through the pages—"aha!"—until he found the paper he was looking for and pulled it out. Handwritten at the top of a ragged-edged piece of notebook paper were the words "Reverse Sunscreen". Bill read through the list of ingredients—"Oh, pepper juice, not pepper flakes, right."—then put the paper back.

He glanced back and forth between the past and present to ensure he put the files back exactly where he'd found them—again, considering Ford's paranoia, he might notice any difference.

And then he returned to the elevator and headed upstairs.

The whole time he was in the study, Bill didn't let himself glance at the back of the room where Ford's shrine to him used to be.

####

"Heya, pal," Bill said. "It's been a while! Where have you been hiding all summer?"

Gompers blinked up at Bill.

"I guess we both look different than we did the last time we met, huh? I think your makeover went better than mine, though! You didn't fall as far as I did." He didn't have as far to fall.

Gompers accepted the backhanded compliment with utter indifference.

"But hey, why talk about the past! Let's let bygones be bygones. Here." Bill knelt, pulled one of Ford's nutrition pills from the folds of his beach towel, and held it out. "A peace offering! A little snack for you."

Gompers eyed it warily.

"Come on, you've eaten worse things than this."

He delicately ate the pill out of Bill's hand.

"Thaaat's right. Tell me how you like that thing later."

Leaning on his car, Stan—the only other person who'd actually been ready to go at 6:30—looked over Bill's shirt and trout slippers, and asked warily, "You didn't forget that humans need to wear pants, right?"

Bill got to his feet, shoved his makeshift umbrella-cane under the same arm as his beach towel, and pulled up the hem of the puma shirt he'd stolen from the gift shop to reveal his bikini bottom. It was teal with little puffy gold triangles painted on. "Cover-up dress. Your arbitrary fashion rules are different for beaches."

Stan considered whether a t-shirt counted as a dress, decided he didn't know enough about dresses and he might as well give this one to Bill, and grunted. "Fine, you're legal."

"Am I free to go, officer?"

"Never compare me to a cop again."

"Stop acting like one!" Bill trotted off to his ride to wait for the other humans to assemble.

There wasn't room for all eight beachgoers in one vehicle; the Pines piled together in Stan's car, while the Ramirezes (including Melody—honorary future Ramirez—and Bill—magic braceleted to Abuelita) took Soos's truck. So that Abuelita didn't have to squeeze past the front seats into the back, Bill and Melody were assigned the back bench; when Bill greeted Melody and she only responded with a vague mumble and an averted gaze, he scooted closer to the middle of the bench, spread his knees to take up more space, and smugly pretended not to notice how Melody squeezed herself against the door.

By the time the Ramirez vehicle parked at the beach, the Pines family was already out of their car: Stan was glaring up the beach with his fists on his hips, the kids were unsuccessfully searching Mabel's supply bag for Dipper's sunscreen, and Ford was lingering back at the car, pretending to check the contents of their tackle box but actually trying to shake the sudden memory of weightlessness and water in his throat. As Bill passed, Ford muttered, "I'm surprised you wanted to get this close to the lake so soon. Considering." It had been less than a week since their joint near death experience.

"Why not? Nearly drowning was the most fun part of that hike." (Ford wondered whether that was a red flag, an underhanded comment about how unfun the rest of the hike had been, or just Bill being Bill; and, for his own peace of mind, decided it was probably the third thing.) "Looks like you got something fun out of the trip, too." Bill snapped the shoulder strap of Ford's waders.

Ford shoved Bill's hand away. "As long as I have them, I might as well use them."

When everyone caught up with Stan, he was scowling at four men, ages ranging from 50 to 80, wearing fishing vests and hats with the Holy Mackerel's distinctive stylized fish symbol. "Eugene," Stan muttered. "Eugene and his goons wanted to kick me out of the lodge for years. Just because I have a grating personality and am generally unpleasant to be around! And tried to get the lodge to pick a local affordable housing fund as our charity for fundraising one year!"

Ford gave Stan a surprised look. "You never mentioned you worked with an affordable housing charity."

"Yeah. The Compassionate Angel's Fund For Gravity Falls Tourism Business Owners Who Are Behind On Their Mortgage Payments."

Ford snorted. 

Bill said, "I think you should've gotten away with it just for being funny."

"Don't even look at them," Stan instructed the group. "These jerks aren't worth it." The collected group studiously avoided looking at the Mackerels, except Bill and Abuelita, who didn't care.

As they walked up the beach toward the pier and veered around the Mackerels, Stan suddenly stopped, turned straight toward them, and said loudly, "Why, Eugene! What a coincidence! I almost didn't notice you!"

A tall, elderly man with a fishing rod over one shoulder and a black wooden cane in his other hand glanced over at the Pines/Ramirez party. "Oh," he said, with a voice like he'd found a fly stuck in gum on his cane. "Hello, Stan-ley. We haven't seen you out on the lake this summer."

Stan laughed loudly, as if Eugene had told a hilarious joke. "Oh, that! I was just waiting for perfect fishing weather! I'm not about to waste my time out on the lake on a bad fishing day!" He gestured behind himself, "Besides, I had to wait until my whole family was free to come along."

(Soos elbowed Melody and whispered excitedly, "He called us his family!")

Stan clapped his hands proudly on Dipper and Mabel's shoulders—who looked like they hoped the sandy beach would swallow them whole—and said, "I don't see your family, Eugene, where are they?"

"Dead." With mournful dignity, Eugene said, "I outlived my wife and all three of my children. Remember? You ate potato chips during my daughter's funeral."

Stan opened his mouth, shut it, and said, "Was that the really boring one that went like an hour?"

Ford, who didn't always have the best social instincts but could tell when Stan had screwed up, started shooing the rest of the family away from the scene, elbowed Stan, and said, "Let's get to the boat. You wanted to get a prime fishing spot, right?"

Eugene looked at Ford. "Ah. You must be the real Stanford Pines?" he said. "So I'm assuming, anyway. Apparently it's hard to tell you two apart."

Stan scowled; but before he could retort, Bill pushed past him to butt into the conversation. "Is it ever! Listen, take it from someone who's made this mistake—you've got to count the fingers on these two, every time."

Eugene huffed sardonically. "So it seems." (Ford self-consciously hid his hands in his pockets and shot Bill a dark look as he shuffled off with the rest of the family.)

"Say, while I've got your attention—name's Goldie, by the way—I couldn't help but admire your cane!" He tapped the tip of his umbrella against Eugene's cane. "I'm in the market for an upgrade from this substitute I've been using! That's no blackwood, right? That looks like true ebony."

"Good eye," Eugene said, surprised. "Yes, genuine Gaboon ebony."

"Must've dropped a lot of gold on this thing," Bill said appreciatively. "You've gotta tell me where you got it."

"I'm afraid I don't remember off the top of my head..."

"That's fine! Look it up—" (he twisted around to speak over his shoulder as Stan grabbed his arm and dragged him away) "—I'm sure we'll meet again!"

About fifteen feet away, Stan growled, "What was that?"

"Networking. I've got plans for that guy," Bill said. "Hey, did you hear him? Gaboon ebony?" He laughed condescendingly. "Easiest way to make a guy look like a moron, start talking about 'true' ebonies. Didja know the word 'ebony' comes from Egyptian? And when they talked about ��𓈖𓏭𓆱, they were talking about African blackwood. Wood so hard it sinks and you have to tool it like a metal! Gaboon ebony is a flimsy usurper!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"But you don't pretend you do, and that's what makes you better than that guy." Bill tugged Stan down by the shoulder. "Listen, Fisherman. I can't tell you where the fish are biting but I can tell you where they're swimming. It'll give you an advantage, but you'll need to do the rest."

Stan squinted mistrustfully at Bill. "What's the catch."

"The catch is you have to accept my help. Do you want it or not?"

"And why are you offering?"

"Because I think these lodge guys are a bunch of snobs. And they should've chosen your charity. It was funny."

That, plus Stan had been the most reluctant to let Bill live; Bill had to convince him he'd made the right choice.

Bill gave Stan directions to a bunch of fish he could see underwater by the Island Head Beast's right earhole; and then, his good deed for the day done, he headed off to claim a spot on the beach.

Ford had gone into Tate & Backle's to properly purchase the clothing they'd borrowed after the eclipse, and Soos was helping set Abuelita up with a low beach chair and a large umbrella. Bill smoothed out a patch of sand about ten feet from Abuelita so he could lay out his beach towel and dump his supplies for the day beside it. While Mabel and Melody got the boat ready, Dipper wandered around looking for sunscreen to borrow. He saw Bill's tube, snatched it without asking, and generously coated his arms, legs, and face. Bill fought back a grin and pretended not to notice.

He tossed aside his t-shirt and fish slippers, settled down on the towel in his bikini, carefully squeezed several horizontal lines of reverse sunscreen across the front of his abdomen and thighs, and drew a few vertical lines in between to break them up.

Ford trudged over from the bait shop to tell Bill, "I thought you'd like to know those ridiculous fish slippers were thirty dollars."

Bill laughed. "Whoa! Seems like a lot of money for some cheap novelty shoes! It's too bad you decided to trap me in a position where I'm too destitute and powerless to make my own purchases, isn't it?"

"All right, all right." Ford's gaze caught on the bruise-blue line discoloring the skin from Bill's left shoulder to his right hip—had he gotten injured during one of his hikes the past week? Or had that always been there? Ford didn't think he'd ever seen Bill's body shirtless, maybe it had always been here—but then he noticed Bill's lines of sunscreen and barked a laugh. "I suppose you're not planning to rub that in."

"Brilliant observation." Bill began smoothing down the lines with a finger, maintaining the pattern he'd drawn.

"You wanted to come out here to suntan? I'm sure you're already aware of the cancer risks from tanning."

"If I'm in this body long enough to get cancer, I'll welcome it." Bill lay down, laced his hands behind his head, and gave Ford an obnoxious smile. "Anyway, basal cell carcinomas are delicious. There's something kinda romantic about them, you know?"

Ford ruminated on that with thoughtful bafflement, shushed the voice in his head trying to point out that Bill was waving ever more red flags, and concluded that perhaps humans weren't meant to comprehend the romanticism of skin cancer. "Fine."

"What's everyone standing around for?" Stan asked, trudging up to Soos and Ford. "C'mon, we're burning daylight! Let's..." He trailed off, staring at Bill.

His bikini top consisted of two triangular red cups. Each cup had an enormous staring eye.

"See something ya like?" Bill asked dryly.

Stan quickly looked away. "Ugh. That's indecent."

"What is?"

"That—design!"

"What's indecent about eyeballs?"

"It looks like...!" He gestured vaguely but emphatically.

"What? What does it look like? Tell me what it looks like, Stanley."

"Never mind!" He turned away with a huff and muttered to Ford, "Can you believe him?"

"I honestly didn't notice anything until you pointed it out." Ford waved back at Bill dismissively as he followed Stan toward the boat. "Enjoy your sunburn."

"I will! I haven't had a good sunburn in centuries! That's one of the best features of earthling bodies!" Bill got comfortable and shut his eyes.

Soos finished getting Abuelita settled, headed toward the boat—but hesitated as he passed by Bill. Bill opened an eye a crack to glower up at him. "What?"

Soos mumbled, "You could've just told me you wanted to get sunburned. I mean—yesterday."

"But you didn't ask if I wanted a sunburn," Bill snapped. "You just assumed I didn't know how they work. And that's the point: you assumed I was stupid instead of considering that maybe you didn't know my plan."

"Oh. Uh... sorry." Soos rubbed the back of his neck. "I didn't mean to make you feel stupid."

Bill's irritation flared higher. He sat up. "I didn't say you made me feel stupid," he hissed, voice low, talking fast. "There's nothing that you could do to make me feel stupid. But that doesn't mean you aren't treating me like I'm stupid, does it?"

"Whoa—!" Soos raised his hands defensively. "Chill, dawg. I didn't mean—"

"What's the phrase, do ut des? 'Do unto others'? Your species's phrase. Don't treat me like I'm stupider than you and I won't have to return the favor—sound like a fair deal, Question Mark?" Bill stared up at him challengingly, brows raised.

"But th— I w— You..." Soos's protests that he'd been doing nothing but trying to do-unto-others Bill got jumbled all around under the force of Bill's spotlight glare. His shoulders slumped. "Sure," he mumbled. "Sorry."

"Good." Bill lay back down. "Get out of my sun."

Soos trudged away; and Bill took a deep breath, tried to get in a meditative mindset where he could shut off his mind, and focused on the feeling of sunshine on his body.

He'd just about managed to drop into a proper trance when Abuelita called sweetly, "Bill? Would you grab a bottle of water for me?"

His face twitched toward a frown as he was dragged back to full consciousness. Hadn't Soos left them close enough for her? Some grandson. 

"Bill?"

He tried to think of an excuse to stay where he was; then growled in irritation and sat up. "Okay, okay." He couldn't afford to offend the chef with access to the poisons.

The bag with the water bottles was right behind Abuelita's elbow; but maybe her joints were stiff. Bill knelt to unzip the bag. "Another bodice ripper?" he asked, glancing at her book. 

"A powerful sorceress queen has been captured by her enemies. She just learned they are led by her former apprentice."

"I can sympathize with that." Bill dragged the bag up next to Abuelita's knee so he wouldn't need to grab another bottle for her later. "Who's the love interest—guileless guard? Heroic rescuer?"

"The apprentice."

"Sympathy's gone." Bill glanced toward the boat to see what the rest of the household was up to.

They'd already reached the spot Bill had indicated and started fishing. Soos was excitedly reeling in his line; the boat listed to one side as everyone crowded around him to see what he'd brought up. Stan dipped a net in the water to scoop up his catch.

It was a boot.

Everyone's faces fell in disappointment.

Except for Ford's, who gleefully snatched up the boot he'd kicked off during the eclipse when he fell in the lake. He dumped the water out of his boot, switched places with Soos, and began fishing the same spot.

Abuelita said, "My grandson has been very nice to you."

Bill looked at her warily.

"Hasn't he?" She had a polite smile and daggers in her eyes.

He had the oddest feeling that this was going somewhere dangerous. "Yeah yeah yeah, sure he has," Bill said. "Nothing but nice. I think I'll take a little stroll, stretch these legs! See ya!" He stood to escape.

He only got a step away before the enchanted bracelet pulled tight around his wrist. He turned around to stare in amazement.

Abuelita had wrapped the slack of the bracelet thread around her hand.

Bill had made a severe miscalculation.

"So," Abuelita said. "Why are you being mean to my grandson." It was a trap all along. She'd agreed to be handcuffed to him so she could corner him for an interrogation.

"Whaaat," Bill said. "Me? No way! I'd never!"

Abuelita stared at him patiently.

"I don't even talk to him," Bill said, trying to think of a conversational escape route.

She raised a brow.

Got it. "He's just too nice, you see! I don't know how to talk to a guy that nice," he lied. "Makes things awkward!" How could any grandmother complain about her grandson being called too nice? "Yeah—not Jesús's fault at all. I don't hold it against him."

"Ah," Abuelita said, "you aren't used to people being nice to you?"

Sure, they could go with that, try to get him some pity. "Yeah! You know how it is. King of Nightmares, scourge of the multiverse—I'm not a popular guy."

"But you have friends, don't you? The scary ones you brought with you to town last year? Are they not nice to you?"

Bill hesitated, trying to figure out his story now. "Sure—they're nice to me. They're my friends! They love me! They'd do anything I say!"

"Oh. So, you're only comfortable with people being nice to you when you can control them." Abuelita smiled sweetly.

Swift, efficient, and brutal. Bill gaped at her.

"I'm glad you have nothing against Soos," she said. "And that you won't be rude to him."

Bill snapped his mouth shut. "Of course not." He gave Abuelita a tight smile. Played like a fiddle. Even though he'd been lying, she still managed to make him look like a loser. How embarrassing. "If you don't mind, I've got a sunburn to get back to."

"I'm not stopping you." She let the extra thread on the bracelet cuffs unwind from her hand and drop to the sand.

Bill trudged back to his towel, snapping as he went, "I hope this is one of those books you hate where the couple only gets hitched because they've got a baby coming."

"The sorceress has magical birth control."

"Course she does."

Bill flopped onto his towel again and stared at the sky. Ouch.

####

(I've been promising Agent Powers AND a beach episode for ages, and we finally get to them both at the same time. Let me know what y'all think so for!)

[kkatastrophic]

Danganronpa Characters Watching a Move (at the cinema)

Eats all their food before the movie starts:

Akane - Foodie

Aoi - No self control when it comes to food

Hiro - Somehow accidentally eats it all

Kaito - Trips while walking up the stairs and spills it everywhere.

Nagito - Eats it during the trailers

Cries when the supporting character/animal dies:

Chihiro - Cries when the dog dies

Gundham - Also cries when the dog dies

Himiko - ALSO cries when the dog dies

Kaede - "They were such a supportive character *sniff, sob*"

Mikan - (She cried because the opening was too loud)

Peko - She cried when the dogs were separated in the street

Sakura - "What a loyal character"

Sonia - Cries when the dog dies

Monomi/Usami - "They didn't deserve that" <- Animal and Character

Nekomaru - "They took one for the team... that's loyalty... *sniffling*"

Throws Popcorn/Food at People:

Fuyuhiko - He hits the couple infront of him while they're kissing

Hiyoko - She dumps it on the people being too loud and laughs at them

Kokichi - Throws from far away, Kaito gets blamed and escorted out

Leon - Incredible accuracy, hits the screen when the characters talk, often lands "in their mouths"

Mondo - Throwing popcorn with Leon, missing most of the time, but still having fun.

Monotaro - Dumps it all on his siblings

Gets kicked out of the cinema:

Junko - Already got a permanent ban from it, escorted out on sight.

Kazuichi - Somehow accidentally does something really bad and has to be escorted out, he leaves with Kaito.

Mukuro - Saw the prices of her favourite slushie go up by 50c and threatened the cashier with a hunting knife.

Teruteru - He was innapropriate to the female worker/s.

Monokuma - Escorted out on sight, left right after sneaking in with Junko.

Talking the Whole Time (mostly gets popcorn thrown at them):

Angie - I don't know why, but I think she would.

Ibuki - Extremely loud and constantly gets "shushed"

Hifumi - Rambles about the actors and their voice overs in different anime.

Sayaka - Accidentally unaware, always notices easter eggs

Kiyotaka - Unaware socially and doesn't realise it's wrong

Tenko - Screams at the screen whenever a male comes on, gets shushed constantly and is escorted out to the lobby to wait for the movie to finish.

Monokid - He's just really loud.

Watching the Movie in Peace:

Imposter/Twogami - He's chill about the movie, eats his food quickly and constantly gets up to get more.

Chiaki - Relaxing, fell asleep after the first song/instrumental

Kirumi - Picking up rubbish/popcorn from the floor to help the workers. Stays late to assist with cleanup.

Korekiyo - Occasionally comments, but enjoys the movie nevertheless.

Kyoko - Still and silent, making sligh "huh" "ohhh" noises when she realises plot twists are coming up.

Monodam - Tells everybody to get along, sits with Monomi/Usami and tells the people around him to shush.

Shuichi - Done with everybodies shit by the end, but tolerates it for the other viewers sakes'.

Rantaro - He got no development, I didn't know where to put him.

Ryoma - Sits at the front because he can't see over the seats, quiet and isn't bothered by the others.

Spoils it on Accident:

Keebo - "I read an online forum" and then spoils the majority of the movie.

Mahiru - Searched all the actors on IMDB, watched trailers, found many full movie essay reviews on the movie before buying tickets, went on rotten tomatos for reviews. She wanted to get her moneys worth!

Makoto - Already seen it before because it was trending a week prior, accidentally spoils it but the people next to him don't mind.

Tsumugi - Got spoilers by Mahiru, was already in the fandom, came in cosplay and spoiled a bunch of it while rambling.

Gonta - "Gonta heard (spoils entire plot, then starts talking about the bee movie)"

Monophanie - "Hm I watched a movie like this... (<- It was the movie they were watching and she spoiled it all.)

Hajime - "Oh no... I'm a failure!" "Yes Hajime, a reserve course student hanging out with the Ultimates... you should be a stepping stone!" (<- He then gets mad at Nagito and spoils it to him purposefully, others hear though.)

Spoils it on Purpose:

Byakuya - Ruins the fun for his own enjoyment

Monosuke - Just wants to be annoying

Celestia - Somebody annoyed her because they took too long to order tickets, she got mad and spoiled it for the rest of the cinema loudly when she walked out of the movie.

Miu - Does it for shits and giggles

Toko - Depending on her mood. She gets mad at somebody next to her and yells at them.

Maki - Was in a bad mood when she walked in, only spoiled it because Kaito was escorted out due to Kokichis bad behaviour.

I LOVE MAKING THESE TELL ME YOUR OPINIONS BELOW!

[obeymematches]

Leviathan reaction when mc confessed they love him when they thought he was a sleep.

Ps. I love your work. \(^^)/

Ohhh that's adorable thank you for requesting 🩷 ily anon ily ❤️‍🔥

Leviathan x you (gn)

The thought of being seperated from him is difficult for your fragile human heart. You've lived with your crush for a year but now you must leave; the chance of meeting him again is slim.

The chance to hear his voice, share a laugh, remind him to brush his teeth, playing for hours without a break might be the last ones today.

Yes, you are aware Leviathan isn't perfect. Why would he have to be??? Loving him came to you so naturally you only noticed when it was already too late; every time he texted you butterflies appeared in your stomach, you were anticipating game nights and talking about animes became one of your favourite parts of the day.

Okay, sure, you did enjoy animes and games before meeting him, however His personality gave everything a new meaning; as you watched your anime you were already thinking of what to talk about with Leviathan. At first he didn't really care about what you had to say but as the weeks turned to months passing by, he started to listen to you. It took a rather long time you have to admit, but you grew a little crush on your demon best friend.

And now you have to go back home. Isn't that great- just when you started to really enjoy being here- It must be a gut feeling but you are sure he is going to be missing you two; it's 4 AM, just a couple of hours are left before you must leave. Your crush is doing his best to stay awake and play your favourite game with you. He doesn't even like this one so much; he likes to pretend he does though.

Maybe to impress you? To prove to you he is worth it?

His charater stopped on the screen.

That was when you heard very quiet snoring coming from next to you. Did he fell asleep???

You couldn't help yourself; you must admit he looked adorable, eyes closed, his controller almost falling off his hands. How could you not smile at such a sight??

"I love you so so much Leviachan... if only you knew how much tonight meant to me...." you murmured oh so quietly, letting out a sigh as you got up to get him a blanket.

If only you knew I love you just as much.

AN: aaaaa what is going to happen now how can he say goodbye like this---- pls Levi be brave you got this---

[midnight-songbird]

As much as we all love Scorpio, there's no denying he deserves to get told off at least once. Maybe more.

This takes place in Scorpio's route, a little after the prologue. The gods have been on earth for a few weeks at this point.

Gender neutral mc, no gendered language used. I am using my own name here, though.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sting Him Back (Scorpio x MC)

I really don't know why I chose him. He's never been anything but rude to me. I try to be nice, but I'm really getting sick of it. He won't even call me by name! He just refuses. It really is infuriating, now that I think about it. If I have to sit through another round of his insults-

"Hey! Stupid human, can't you hear me?! I said get over here and help me!"" Scorpio barks out, startling me out of my thoughts.

Deciding that I've had enough of him, and of being nice, I fire back, "I DO have a name, you know." 

"There's no reason for me to use your name. Stupid human."

"Oh, I've got a reason. It's called respect!"

"Why should I respect a filthy human like you?!"

"Because it costs you NOTHING to be polite! Absolutely nothing! You're making a big deal out of this for no reason!"

"Tch... Who do you think you are, talking to a god like that?" As he speaks, he flashes his upturned sneer at me. Holy hell it pisses me off when he does that.

I have an idea, just to spite him. I've already turned around, my back to him. Standing with my arms crossed over my chest, I pretend like I don't hear Scorpio. I casually make eye contact with Leon and show him a confident grin to silently communicate my plans. He catches on and is unsurprisingly thrilled to play along.

"That Scorpion is stubborn as ever, isn't he," Leon comments.

"Hmph, you're telling me. He's unbearable," I reply back.

"HEY! FILTHY HUMAN!"

I stare at nothing in particular, arms crossed, like I'm deep in thought and didn't hear him.

"Stupid human, look at me when I'm talking to you!"

I give no response. This is about to get fun.

"...Hm? Say something, Scorpio?"

"Yes, I told you-"

"Oh, silly me, must be hearing things."

"DAMMIT HUMAN, YOU BETTER ANSWER ME OR EL-"

Sounds like a good time to have at him.

I whip around to face him, speaking with a mocking tone, "Ohhh, was that supposed to scare me??? Why should I fear a scoundrel like you with no decorum whatsoever?"

"EXCUSE ME?!" comes his indignant screech.

With a sickly sweet smile, a honeyed tone, and a falsely sincere hand to my heart, I say to him, "Oh, of course, you're excused!" My sweet grin turns wicked.

Oh yeah, Scorpio's ticked. Realizing he won't win this, he yells, "UGH!"

And with that, he stomps away, dramatically slamming the door shut behind him.

"Aww, you don't wanna play anymore? That's too bad," I purr out. I'm quite satisfied with myself, if I'm being honest.

With his signature smirk, Leon praises, "I'm impressed, Goldfish. You've got quite the backbone."

Ichthys is shocked, and it shows on his face. "That. Was. AWESOME, WINTER!!!" Now grinning, he adds, "You tooootttallllllyyy told Scorpy off!!!" After his cheers of delight, Ichthys couldn't help himself from sticking his tongue out.

Teorus squawks in agreement, "Yeah! Who knew Goldie could get scary!!!

Dui chimes in next, beaming, "No one can say you aren't brave, Winter."

Huedhaut pipes up with, "I must admit, I admire the snark. Well done."

I play along with Huedhaut, my smile present in my voice, "That's quite the high compliment, considering it came from you."

~~~

Later that evening, I'm still hanging out at the mansion. Scorpio hasn't come back out since he stormed off.

I'm chatting with Dui when I hear something. Scorpio has come back to the living room, presumably thinking I'd be gone by now. The moment he sees me, he stops dead in his tracks and actually growls. I can't say I'm surprised. I am a little amused, however...

Now, Scorpio and I are just staring at each other. Breaking the silence, with heavy sarcasm in my tone, I ask, "What, are you back for more?"

He just scowls, turns on his heel, and walks right out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is my first fic ever, and I really had fun writing it!

And it wouldn't feel right if I didn't thank @fateinthestars , @star-crossed-mid , @pyxianox , @izaberu-chann , and @eclipsegalaxy ! They all helped me out in writing this! Thank you guys <3

I think I'll have a little epilogue to this at some point, I have no idea when.

[therhythmafterthesummer]

Rhythm, how would couples react to a pregnancy scare?

Thanks, hope you'll have a good day😘

ohhh, this was sooo fun to think about.

my Thoughts™ under the cut.

Listen, Chris is down to have children. the mere thought of his girl being pregnant makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside, he's just Ready, and when Pretty tells him she's late, he's honestly kinda hopeful... that is, until he realises how distressed she looks. "it'll be fine, pretty. with either scenario, it'll be fine", he'll tell her. to which she'll simply reply, in the quietest voice you can imagine, "i don't think i'm ready right now, though..." and even though it saddens him a bit, he understands. after all, it'll be her doing all the heavy lifting (meaning, growing the baby--or babies?), so he simply offers his support. when she gets her period the very next day, before she could even take a test, she's immensely relieved, and Chris is just happy that his girl is happy, regardless of how much he wants to be a dad. there'll be time for that, he doesn't want to if she doesn't want to, you know?

Minho has a few minutes of panic when Kitten tells him her period's late. two weeks she said. "you're two weeks late and you didn't say anything?!" to which she'll just reply "i thought it'd come! i'm telling you now!" they both panic for a bit. there'll be a few minutes of silence while Minho paces around the room and she just sits on the sofa, nervously chewing on her lip. after a while, he'll just take a deep breath, ruffle his hair, go crouch in front of his dearest kitten to hold her hands and look up at her. "if you were pregnant... would you like to keep it, or...?" and after a few moments of consideration, she'd just be like "...yeah. yeah, i'd like to keep it. but only if you want to, too", and Minho realises then that even if it scares him a bit, he does want to. so when the test came back negative, they both had mixed feelings. "at least we have more time to prepare now... we need to figure out how we'd want to raise our children first", he'll say, and she'll just wholeheartedly agree.

"i think i might be pregnant", Ginger tells Changbin, while he was brushing his teeth. he chokes on his spit. "holy shit, are you serious right now?" and she'll just nod. Changbin will practically start vibrating with excitement, meanwhile she already is vibrating with excitement. they weren't trying to get pregnant, but they both are happy with the idea, which is why, they're both bummed out when she takes a test and is negative. they'll stare at the stick on the sink, arms crossed over their chests, silent, thinking... until Spicy Gingerbread says "i can't believe we're both moping about a negative pregnancy test..." and Changbin just laughs and hugs her and mumbles a "maybe we should start planning..."

The chances of Hyunlix's partner (let's call them.... Moss) being pregnant are very slim, but never zero. They've got a uterus, and having a uterus when you're being sexually active with two people with penises will always pose a risk, no matter how careful you are. The three of them will just sit in complete silence on the sofa while they wait for the test results. Hyunjin would be ready to take care of pups if it came to it, and Felix, although isn't beaming with excitement, he supposes he can be a good dad, but after the silence stretches out for too long Moss just drops a "hope you guys know that if this test is positive i'm going full on Fetus Deletus" which will make both Felix and Hyunjin snort, and the three of them will just enter a fit of laughs. when the timer goes off and they check the test to see it's negative, the three of them heave a sigh of relief, and they'll reach a compromise to be more careful moving forward, since honestly neither of them actively want children.

[mischief-lies-and-stories]

Loki Episode 4 Incoherent Thoughts

I know we have two more episodes. I know it's (probably) gonna be fine. But goddamn, guys.

I hope this episode doesn't completely disprove the end of my fic so soon.

Also the word Heart in the title is turning me into more of an absolute Fool

This intro is making me very upset

HOW DID THIS RECORDING GET BACK TO THE TVA IN THE WAR ROOM

OH SHIT

OH FUCKING SHIT

NO YOU'RE NOT, YOU DOUCHE

Welp, already. Before the title card. Damn.

Why does the door stay open at the end of the last episode for Loki and Mobius, but close immediately in this one though?

Sylvie!

Wait no Heart is in the title.

I SWEAR TO GOD IF RENSLAYER AND MINUTES END UP TOGETHER AND THE ONLY GAY REP WE GET IS THE VILLAIN LADY AND THE ANIMATED CLOCK I'M GONNA LOSE IT

Loki being soft and gentle is KILLING ME

You didn't need to give me that long of a shot on that screen. I know the future's approaching.

B15 I WOULD DIE FOR YOU

Fucking hell I love this. I want the end of this so bad to be lokius and Sylvie as my trio but not a throuple.

Gaybies!

His number two fan!

LOOK AT CASEY BACK THERE SMILING LIKE A PROUD BOYFRIEND I'M SORRY I SHIP THESE TWO SO BAD

ANOTHER REASON WHY HIS NAME IS OUROBOROS I'M DYING

OH MY GOD HE SAID THE THING OB YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THE THING I'M SCREAMING

OH MY GOD THIS IS KILLING ME

SYLVIE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M SO HAPPY YOU'RE HERE

OB YOU MADE MINI-FIGURES?!

STOP I HAVE TOO MANY THINGS TO WRITE I CANNOT WRITE A FIC WHERE OB DMS THEIR DND CAMPAIGN

OB'S NOT SO SUBTLE LOOK AT SYLVIE WHEN HE SAYS "When someone killed He Who Remains" AND HER RESPONDING LOOK OF PRIDE LIKE 'Thank you, and I'd do it again' AND LOKI LIKE 'Not in front of the variant, please' IS FUCKING SENDING ME

"And ruined my life" OB YOU'RE MY FAVORITE OFFICIALLY

THE BICKERING IS BACK BABYYY ALSO IT'S ABSOLUTELY YOUR TURN LOKI HE'S RIGHT

CASEY AND OB JUST IDLY WATCHING THE BANTER I CANNOT WITH THIS EPISODE OH MY GOD

SYLVIE JUMPING INTO THE BICKERING OH NO OH NO (this is an oh no for me, maybe I'll explain what oh no means in reaction posts later, if anything comes of this one. God I hope not)

Loki is a very fast runner

VICTOR

But also please do not come in the way of Casey and OB

Ohhh fuck

I thought she was gonna restore his memories without permission, I really did

[I just paused typing the reactions because I thought of a theory OH MY GOD]

LOKI DON'T GO AFTER HER YOU KEEP CHOOSING MO STOP

OH FUCKING BRAD AGAIN

WHY ARE THEY ALL IN THERE THAT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA

THIS IS ABOUT TO BE A PRISON RIOT

B15 NO YOU CAN'T TRUST THEM

They're for sure gonna go for it AND THEN TURN ON YOU WHEN IT'S TIME

NO THAT'S THEIR PLACE

Lord please don't kiss

Loki you're doing great sweetie please don't try to kiss her

LOKI STOP I'M GONNA WRITE A POEM IF YOU KEEP SPITTING WISDOM

SYLVIE YOU'VE SEEN WIZARD OF OZ??!!

Don't you DARE FUCKING kiss her

Oh thank god

FUCK YOU RENSLAYER

FUCK OFF BITCH

BRAD THAT'S A BOLD FACE LIE

MINUTES GO FUCK YOURSELF (Timely's not gonna do it, after all)

EEEWWW

MINUTES YOU FUCKING BITCH YOU'RE SMILING THAT'S DISGUSTING

BRAD YOU BETTER TURN ON A BITCH

THE TEMPAD ISN'T WORKING??!!

This is weird

WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS WEIRD SHIT

BRAD YOU MOTHER FUCKER DON'T! FUCK

MOBIUS WHAT DID YOU PLAY? I BET IT WAS CANDY CRUSH AND AMONG US

FUCKING HELL I HATE THIS SO FUCKING MUCH FUCK THIS

TIMELY OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD SYLVIE

FUCK MY BRAIN IS MOVING FAST AND GOD I HATE IT I KNOW WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN I PAUSED IT

SO IT MIGHT NOT HAPPEN TILL NEXT WEEK BUT: So they're separated, Sylvie gets up, pries open the elevator doors in time to see past Loki get pruned but thinks it's current Loki. And she's very upset about it. Then current Loki shows up and they reunite and she kisses him for real this time. GOD PLEASE NO I'M GONNA BE NERVOUS FOR THE NEXT SEVENTEEN MINUTES MINUS WHENEVER THAT HAPPENS.

ON THE OTHER HAND IF YOU JUST HUG HIM I CAN HANDLE THAT

THERE'S PAST LOKI SHIT HERE WE GO

ELEVATOR BROKEN. I MIGHT START CRYING PREMATURELY

IF I GET THIS RIGHT I'M GONNA BE SHOCKED I NEVER PREDICT THINGS RIGHT EVEN IF THEY'VE BEEN HEAVILY FORESHADOWED.

I DON'T WANT THIS TO BE THE MOMENT I CHECK OFF THAT BINGO SQUARE PLEASE NO

SYLVIE GOOD GIRL OH MY GOD YOU'RE SO SMART THIS IS WHY YOU ARE THE SUPERIOR VARIANT

WAIT WE STILL DON'T KNOW WHO'S ON THE PHONE THOUGH

WAIT PAUSED AGAIN. WAS I ORIGINALLY RIGHT, DOES FUTURE LOKI PRUNE PAST LOKI? OKAY EVERYTHING ABOUT MY PREDICTION IS THE SAME EXCEPT SHE'S ONLY UPSET UNTIL PAST BOI DISAPPEARS BECAUSE CURRENT BOI IS RIGHT THERE. OKAY PRESSING PLAY AGAIN

RIPPING OPEN THE DOOR, CURRENT LOKI WITH PRUNE STICK Y'ALL AS SOON AS I FIGURED OUT HE ACTUALLY GOT PRUNED FROM BEHIND I SAID IT WAS LOKI

DO IT LOKI MOBIUS NEEDS YOU

OH RIGHT YOU NEED TO SEE SYLVIE RIGHT. I forgot you understood this shit better than I do.

There's a guy in another apartment yelling ARGH, and that's a BIG MOOD right now dude lol.

"I promise you this will make sense." You're killing me Loki PLEASE DON'T KISS HER

ANSWER THE PHONE

STOP YELLING RANDOM DUDE IN MY BUILDING, EVERYTHING'S OKAY (FOR NOW)

FUCK YES DO IT, OB

ALSO THANK GOD NO KISS YET

This man is still yelling and it's been like 3-5 minutes.

I AGREE WITH LOKI AND SYLVIE LOL

YEAH DIE BITCH

OH SHIT I WAS GONNA FUCKING SAY NOT AGAIN BUT SHE SAID HER PIECE HOLY SHIT

GET HIM

YES

YES FUCKING DIE

Thanks V

TELL HIM LOKI

NO TIMELY I WANT LOKI TO TELL MOBIUS AND I DON'T TRUST YOU THAT MUCH

AND LOKI'S FOR SURE A FASTER RUNNER

I DON'T LIKE THAT WE THINK WE'RE GONNA FIGURE OUT-- FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

OH NO

NOOOOOOOOO IT'S THE SHOT NOOOOOOOO

WAIT WAIT DID HE TIME SLIP OR TURN INTO BLACK HOLE SPAGHETTI [Pretty sure it's the second one]

wait. Why are there pictures of the episode including the last scene in the files at the TVA? (I know it's the credits but I'm choosing to accept it as canon)

It all comes down to Brad I guess??

I. Need to go like. Stare at a wall for a little bit or something.

[hemlocksandfoxgloves]

Has anybody heard of "It Was All Just a Game" by write_me227? It's the very beautiful and talented untold story of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. Set during the years between 4th year and 8th year, it's the complete retelling of Harry Potter, the way it should've gone. Now if you don't like JK Rowling but you love Harry Potter/Drarry, this is the story for you. This is the author for you! This story is so beautifully written, down to the descriptions, every last detail, a complete character study of Draco and Harry.

During the Goblet of Fire, Draco Malfoy comes up with this miraculous plan to make a fool out of Harry Potter by making him fall in love. Draco didn't count on his plan backfiring and falling for Harry himself, and harder. They go on to have a beautiful, beautiful and loving relationship. Until of course, Voldemort finds out about their relationship. The heartbreak, the torture, the secrets! (Ohhh, I'm crying just thinking about it!!)

Now I must warn you this story deals with some heavy, heavy themes, some to note are: a severe eating disorder, body dysmorphia, emotional abuse, manipulation, physical abuse, PTSD, grief, suicidal ideation.

I will note myself she writes an excellent graphic description of a panic attack. I have panic attacks myself and it was very spot on.

Just keep in mind this isn't a story you should be reading if you're not in the right state of mind, especially 6th year.

"Safe is with me." (Totally not crying)

One of my favorite scenes:

Draco entered the Slytherin Common Room the next morning as Pansy and Blaise were getting ready for breakfast.

"Long night with Potter," they asked.

"It was nice," Draco smiled softly. "Best I've slept in a few weeks."

"Oh, we're glad you're not fighting," Pansy said.

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Why would we be?"

Blaise straightened his tie. "We figured after you heard about the Chang kiss, you'd lose your head."

"What Chang kiss?" Both Pansy and Blaise closed their mouths. Draco's eyes narrowed between the guilty looks on their faces. "What Chang kiss?"

Which was how Draco found himself waiting outside the Great Hall for Harry to come down from his shower before class. He leant up against the castle wall, his arms crossed, fuming.

He watched as Harry descended from the seventh floor alone. Granger and Weasley must've been eating already. When Harry arrived at his landing, he looked up at him, and then looked around to make sure the coast was clear. "Hey you."

"Forget to mention something, Potter," he gritted.

Harry pulled a look of confusion and then, as it hit him, his eyes widened in the realization. "I'm so sorry." Draco pushed past him, charging down the stairs towards the dungeons, and Harry followed. "Wait, please let's talk about it!"

Draco ignored his plea, and continued towards the common room, but Harry grabbed hold of his wrist and pulled him back into their usual broomstick cupboard. Harry locked the door behind him and cast a silencing charm.

"You have five seconds to convince me not to commit murder. Five. Four. Three. Two—"

"If you're in Azkaban, then you'll miss our Friday dates."

Draco's eyes narrowed. "You're allowed visitors in Azkaban. I'm sure we could find a schedule."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Harry rushed.

"You didn't think to mention it while we slept next to each other, or did you just want to snog from anybody that stops by?"

"Would saying 'the kiss was so bad that I forgot about it' help?"

"No, not really," Draco sneered. "It happened. You saw me twice yesterday. You didn't care to mention that you kissed someone else. I had to hear it from Blaise and Pansy who heard it from ten other people."

Harry frowned, dejected. "I'm such an arsehole. I deserve it. Go on, yell." Draco stared at him. "Why aren't you saying anything?"

"Because I really don't want anything like the Quidditch incident. I don't want to do anything stupid. I want to think rationally... but it's really hard to." Draco swallowed. His chest burned. "Why aren't my kisses good enough for you?"

"They are," Harry said. "I promise they are, they're amazing."

"If they were, then you wouldn't kiss anyone else. I'm gonna go," Draco's voice cracked.

"No! Please don't," Harry stepped in front of the door.

"Harry ... I want you to have friends. I want you to have your own life, but the thought of someone else kissing you. And then you didn't bloody tell me about it. We spent the night together. We had hours to talk about it."

"You had a horrible break, and I just wanted to make you feel better. I didn't want you to be angry."

"Oh, we're well past that! Furious sounds much more accurate. You cheated on me and then didn't tell me about it? I thought we were supposed to come to each other about cover-ups. I reckon if it was a cover up you would have told me instead of hiding it."

"I'm sorry! I tried looking for you on the train, I couldn't find you. I don't want to lose you," Harry cried. "I'm so scared that the rug is going to be pulled out from under me. That someone is going to take you away. I didn't want to do that to me."

"So you lied to me and hurt me more?"

"Draco." Draco moved towards the door but Harry stepped in front of it. "Wait, no please! Hear me out. It was a mistake. We were in the Room of Requirement, she was crying, it was right before we left for holiday—"

"And you let her say Happy Christmas by shoving her mouth on to yours!?"

"No! Please, just listen to me," Harry said as Draco turned around, heading to the door. He pulled on his arm. "It meant nothing. It was just a few seconds."

Draco's eyes narrowed even worse. "A few seconds? You didn't push her away?"

"I didn't know what to do!"

"Push her away!"

"She was crying, I didn't want to hurt her."

"So you chose to hurt me instead." His jaw poked out.

"That's not how it was. She just did it. I didn't even realize she was doing it. When she was, I thought someone was watching, and it'd be a good cover up, but no one was there and—"

"So she just went up to you? I'm going to kill her for touching you."

"No no no no," Harry grasped his hand, shoving his wand back into his robe. "No, you will not! If anything, take it out of me."

"Oh yes, I will take it out on your bloody arse, Harry Potter! You prick! I can't believe you'd let this happen! And then you didn't tell me about it!"

"It was awful, if it helps at all."

"Of course it was awful! She's not me."

Harry winced. "It didn't mean anything, I promise!"

"I'm your boyfriend. I'm the only one who's allowed to kiss you. She can't kiss you. You're mine, I'm yours. We mutually agreed to be in a relationship together. That means we don't kiss other people because we want to kiss each other. If we want to kiss other people, then we break up. That's how that works."

"I didn't want to kiss her! I want to kiss you so much right now." Harry took a step forward, but Draco took a step back.

"Hell no. Who does she think she is going at you like that?" Draco grabbed his wand. "She can't just kiss you if you don't want it! Hell, she didn't work hard enough for it! I had to fake my way into your heart, then get a bloody nose before you even kissed me, and she walked right on up to you and just did it and got away with it!"

Draco turned away from him, defeated. Harry expected him to act like this, though it still hurt. "This wasn't supposed to happen to you. I'd expect it from anyone else but you. You're good. You're a good person." He bit his lip. "I would have at least thought you'd have the sense of pushing her away."

"She was crying," Harry argued.

"Yes, and you have a boyfriend," Draco turned to him. "Even in secret, you have a bloody boyfriend. You should have stood up for me, for us, Harry. You couldn't have at least lied?"

"I-I... I didn't know what to do. I was shocked—"

"That doesn't matter," Draco growled. "You didn't tell me about it!"

"I'm sorry," he cried, reaching out to touch Draco's cheek. He didn't push him away, but he glared at him, sneered at him, made the point that Harry wasn't welcome like that to him.

"Whose boyfriend are you, Harry?" Draco growled, standing closer to him.

"Yours."

"What's my name?"

"Draco."

Draco pressed him back against the wall. "Whose boyfriend are you?"

"I'm yours. I'm Draco's. I'm Draco Malfoy's boyfriend."

"And whose boyfriend aren't you?"

"I really want to kiss you right now."

"Whose boyfriend aren't you?"

"Cho Chang's," Harry swallowed, looking Draco dead in the eye, then down at his lips.

"Wrong answer," he bit, "Hey, up here."

Harry's eyes snapped up to Draco's. "I'm not Cho Chang's boyfriend, I'm Draco Malfoy's."

"Both true, but not what I'm looking for."

"I-I don't understand."

"The correct answer is 'nobody else's boyfriend.'" Harry nodded, but Draco wasn't satisfied. "Say it."

"I'm Draco Malfoy's boyfriend. I'm nobody else's boyfriend."

"Good. Now, if you want to go around letting other people kiss you, then you'd better break up with me. Cheating isn't something I accept, especially after we laid out the terms and conditions before we even started dating."

"No, I could never break up with you. I don't want anybody else. I'm your boyfriend, you're my boyfriend. I love that you're my boyfriend."

Draco turned cold. "Hm, do you now?"

"Draco, please don't be like this," Harry urged, but Draco turned cold.

"My boyfriend was kissed by someone who wasn't his boyfriend and you want me to not be angry. Here, let me congratulate you on getting some action while I couldn't provide," he snapped before turning away from him and heading for the door.

"Wait," Harry rushed in front of the handle, denying access to it. "I didn't mean it like that. I just want you to be happy."

"Then maybe the next time someone comes within an inch of your mouth, you'll push them away. Move."

"No," Harry stayed firm. "Damn it, Draco. I said I'm sorry! I knew you'd be angry, but hell. It was just a few seconds. Nothing more. What else can I do to make it up to you?"

Draco crossed his arms. He hadn't realized he was breathing heavy. He couldn't help it. It hurt. Harry hurt him. "What do you think, Harry? What do you think you should have to do to make up for you cheating on me? What would you do if the roles were switched? What would you do if spent the entire night with me and I didn't tell you about it?"

"I... I don't know," he looked at the floor. "I would think that you were scared and nervous and didn't want to lose the best thing that happened to you."

Draco frowned. "Even so, I wouldn't hide this from you."

"Draco, please! I don't want you to be angry anymore. I'll do anything."

"You didn't answer my question. What would you do if the roles were switched?"

Harry opened his mouth, then closed it. He stepped aside and gave Draco access to the door as he looked down. "I would break up with you," he swallowed. "You're right. I should have pushed her away. I should have told you."

Closing his eyes, he waited for Draco to leave, to think it over, or he could just do it now. It was up to him. Looks like we aren't going to make it a year...

After a few moments of silence, Harry waiting, Draco, rather than leaving, strode to him. Harry opened his glossy eyes and looked directly into his. "I shall expect a new pair of dragon hyde gloves from Borgan and Burkes, the ones with the purple scales that just came out designed by Bruno Murano, in my mailbox by tomorrow morning, along with a top quality back and neck massage as well as a bouquet of nice-arse roses—white, not the red ones, we have to cleanse our relationship—and you're not allowed to go near that Chang girl for a week so she gets the message. If she tries talking to you, you walk away. You can explain it to her later, and if she asks questions, tell her your boyfriend, Draco Malfoy, is ensuring nothing like that will ever happen again."

"You're not breaking up with me?"

Draco breathed before answering. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, too. You're right. It was just a few seconds. It's not worth it."

The boy nodded. "It will never happen again."

"Damn right it won't ever happen again. That being said," Draco grabbed Harry by his shirt's collar, pushed him against the wall, and advanced onto him, making sure their bodies were pressed together. "No one is allowed to be this close to you."

"Yes," Harry said.

"If they are, they're too bloody close. If you can feel their breath on your mouth, too close."

He nodded. His eyes were dilated, and he didn't really hear what he was saying because Draco just looked so...

"And," Draco continued, "If anyone so much touches you below here," he put a hand on his shoulder, "I'll find them and hex them."

"Please do."

"And if anyone so much as," Draco leaned down, gracing his lips against Harry's delicately, "I swear to Salazar himself, I will murder them." Harry laughed. "You think I'm joking?"

"Oh, I know you're not," he looked him directly in the eyes.

"And then I'll hex your arse as well. Did you hear me?"

Harry nodded.

"You're sure?"

"Yes."

Draco whispered in his ear. "I'm not sure you do."

"I do," Harry looked back at him with wide eyes. "I promise."

"Don't lie, Harry," Draco hissed. Pressing the lengths of their entire bodies together, he kissed his neck and bit it. "I'm only allowed to do this. I'm the only one allowed to kiss you." Harry moaned, suddenly feeling so hot. Fuck, it felt so good. "I'm the only one allowed to make you blush." Draco turned back and looked at him. "I'm the only one allowed to touch you like this."

"Draco," Harry moaned.

"You're mine and no one else's. I'm yours and no one else's. Have a problem with it? We break up. I'm jealous and possessive. If that's baggage you can't deal with, we can end this now."

"I want you," Harry's eyes dilated. "So much."

Draco captured Harry's lips to his own, kissing him hard. Biting his lower lip, then sucking it, passionately, lovingly. "You're mine."

As Draco's hand slid down to Harry's hips and he kissed Harry's neck, the bell rang, causing them to jump.

"Damn it. We have Potions," Draco said, noticing how red Harry's lips were, and how warm he felt. Harry was breathing heavily. "We can't both be missing from it."

"Y-Yeah... yeah potions..."

"Do you want to go first?"

"Hm?" Harry realized Draco's hand was still on his hip. He quite liked it there.

"Leave first, or do you want me to?"

"I don't want you to leave." He didn't even comprehend he said it, it was an automatic response.

Draco couldn't help but smile. "That's my boyfriend. But really. I have class."

"You go," Harry said, looking away, unable to keep from blushing, "I need to take care of something."

It took Draco half a second to realize, and he forced himself to the door. "I'll see you on Friday."

"See you Friday."

Draco didn't go to class. He instead went to the closest bathroom because he had to take care of something, too.

Also, if you didn't notice, I like making book/fanfic covers. Those are my thing. So if you like them and you'd like me to make one for you, just ask me, and I'd be happy to do it!!

[auroracalisto]

isn't it funny how 'writers' like you complain about this like every week or month? dude if you don't want to write then don't do it, no one is obligated to praise you or congratulate you for your writings. i never get why people like you write, is it for others or yourself? if it's for others then it makes complete sense why you're bothered when you don't get reblogs or comments or whatever but shouldn't you write for you? haven't you outgrown the entitlement from childhood? boo hoo, no one wants to comment on your work so you claim mental health issues because you've made yourself so sad about it that it actually HAS affected you. you're letting complete strangers dictate whether you write or not. you're not getting paid so why does it matter if people interact or not? so i ask again, do you write for you or for others? and no, 'both' isn't an answer. take the break, reassess why you're here and how you'll move forward.

this is also to @imaginearyparties bc she was complaining the same thing like in november or something. & all other 'mutuals' with this same ridiculous overplayed complaint. either write for you and enjoy that, be fulfilled with it or leave the app/site and become an author that way you're obligated to accolades. enough with the silliness. have a good break.

ohhh i love how you're back in my inbox.

i actually do have mental health issues? i need to take a break because my already on-edge mental health issues are struggling as is, and i would benefit from it. so sorry i want to take care of myself for a minute?? like what do you even want me to say??

should i be offended? like i'm so sorry i'm giving people a reason as to why i'm taking a break.

also, i don't understand why it's such a big deal to you? like you obviously have come into my inbox more than once, along with @imaginearyparties' inbox. why do you care so much? if we're just 'writers' who obviously don't write for ourselves, why do you fucking care?

i do write for myself. i have tons of fics that i've written specifically for myself and i've never posted. i write for enjoyment. but when you've been on tumblr for a while, you realize that it's not the best website for fics. i guess that's my fault for choosing a medium like this, but hot damn. i'm not going to sit here and be told i'm full of shit for wanting a fucking reblog on a fic.

you do not know me, and you do not know my life. i don't know why you still fucking follow me if i bother you that badly for saying i want to take a break for my mental health. are you so far up your ass that you can't even realize that not everyone has peachy-keen mental health and simple things get to them?

i genuinely don't understand why you feel so strongly about this, seeing as i shouldn't say anything about what's bothering me?? like why are you so worked up over it when you didn't have to say anything at all?

thanks for reminding me to turn off my anon messages. maybe you should come off of anon next time you want to say something.

[walkingstackofbooks]

TNG 6x10 and 6x11 Chain of Command, Part 1 & 2 thoughts (rewatching, so possible future spoilers for DS9 too)

I’ve temporarily paused my DS9 re-watch after 2x20 Maquis Part 1 to go through all the Cardassian episodes in TNG to get a better picture of the build up: 4x12, 5x03, 6x10, 6x11, 6x20 and 7x15.

6x10 Part One

Watching Jellico on 1.5x speed makes him even more aggressively brusque

I can't remember if Jellico's genuinely good at his job or if he's very, very bad

The trouble is, he wants people to work for him. Picard has people work with him.

Once again, I had kind of forgotten till I re-watched just how much I liked Picard

(I just looked up what the Ferengi was called to make my next comment, and genuinely hadn't caught on that he was Solok, who they were looking for! I was wondering why he was so dedicated to calling Solok extraordinary XD)

(Huh, another fun fact - Solok was supposed to be Quark, but DS9 was a few weeks too late in airing for there to be a crossover!)

Daimon Solok kind of looks like Pel?

I don't mind woman using their charm, and that ear stroke wasn't egregious as some... but still, I hate ear stroking ferengi to get your way with them

I cannot tell if Jellicoe is an idiot or very clever

"If the Cardassian Union truly wishes to discuss peace, they can send someone who can negotiate in a civilised manner." Fuck OFF, you're hardly being civilised!!!

Ok, so there was some strategy...

"Well, I'll say this for him. He's sure of himself." "No, he's not." Oh fuck, that's concerning

IT'S A TRAP

That gul looks far too pleased with himself

Action scenes are VERY silly on 1.5x speed XD

Ohhh the next one will be the torture episode right? 😬😬😬

6x11 Part Two

Oh gosh, I was not expecting him to divulge information like Beverly's involvement straight away!

Any action Picard took should be said to be his own, not on behalf of the Federation - Isn't that the defence you should be using?

Yes, it's nice Will's worried about his captain, but tbf the Federation shouldn't withdraw from the sector for Picard. He knew the risks.

Data in red is so damn weird

Madred's child just casually being there is so chilling. Jesus.

Cardassian history is interesting, once being a peaceful people with a rich spiritual life before the military took over

They've discovered the plan!

I don't trust this "you can go" routine

Ohhhh

Oh no

That is the way to torture him. Mention Beverly

Picard walking back to the chair is so similar to Sisko walking back the box in Paradise

Jeeez, the breaking of the egg next to Picard bald head sure is kind of visceral

"Ah! You called me Picard."... "You are six years old. Weak and helpless. You cannot hurt me." What a king!

Crew sticking up for crew :) Geordie pushing for Riker to pilot the mission. :3

This exchange though - go go go Riker!

>>Jellico: "Let's drop the ranks for a moment. I don't like you. I think you're insubordinate, arrogant, wilful, and I don't think you're a particularly good first officer. But you are also the best pilot on the ship.

>>Riker: "Well, now that the ranks are dropped, Captain, I don't like you, either. You are arrogant and closed-minded. You need to control everything and everyone. You don't provide an atmosphere of trust, and you don't inspire these people to go out of their way for you. You've get everybody wound up so tight there's no joy in anything. I don't think you're a particularly good Captain."

"Do I wanna know how close that was?" "No." XD

Ohhhhhh. Oh Picard. Oh, you poor poor thing. He's going to say five isn't he?

JUST IN TIME gosh it's weird being grateful for Cardassians

"There are four lights!". You hero.

"Welcome home, Jean-Luc... Just the way you left it, maybe a little better." Oh, fuck off already Jellico. Though thank you for being involved in Picard's rescue, I guess.

Immediately meeting with Troi, yes, good idea, you definitely need counselling

Oh, Picard <3

These are good episodes. Jellico is infuriating and it's harrowing to watch Picard, but it's a damn good story.

[eusyram]

ໃ royals undercover working in konbini or smth

Send me a ໃ and an AU and I’ll write a random headcanon/drabble/scene about that version of our muses

"Your change will be ¥5.25."

"Thank you for shopping at FamilyMart, see you next time~!"

Princess Mariko Arisa Ryoko Yolanda Sakura Umi Enomoto waved merrily at the customer leaving their kobini before a long sigh made her turn back.

There was her partner, brother, and fellow cashier moping at the window again.

"What's wrong, onii-sama?" Mariko skipped over and rested her chin on his shoulder. "Are you feeling tired again?"

Eiden Enomoto, eldest prince of the Klein Kingdom, only shook his head and ruffled her hair with a smile. "No, it's...don't worry about it, okay?"

"Mou, how could I not worry? You've been down in the dumps ever since okaa-sama moved you from your private shop to part-timing with me at the convenience store!" Mariko pouted and grabbed him by the arm. "Ne ne, what's so special about that shop anyways? Doesn't it just sell items for 'true love'? Why won't you ever let me visit?"

Now Eiden's expression turned stern. "Hey now...you're not old enough for that yet, all right?"

"Onii-sama is being a meanie! I'll be old enough to drive a car next month!" Mariko complained. "Besides, okaa-sama told us to work to learn more about the commoners, but we hardly get any customers here! But I did hear a lot of them come to your shop, so—"

"Where did you hear that?!"

"Hmm? All the other noblemen's daughter gossip about it all the time. Especially after one of their servants saw a weird hooded hobo sneaking into it after hours! They say he was built like a giant, with blond hair and brown eyes and a giant white rat on his shoulder—"

"That's not a hobo, that's the prince of the Forest Kingdom and his royal ferret Topper," Eiden hissed back. "Mari-chan, if our parents heard you calling them that—"

"But what was Prince Quincy doing at your store at night, onii-sama?" Mariko interrupted with big, blinking eyes. "Isn't it closed by then?"

"H-he...he had a private request," Eiden sputtered before adding hastily, "But it's personal, so you can't pry into it, okay?"

Mariko narrowed her eyes, but soon clapped her hands in realization. "Ohhhhh, I get it! He must be buying a secret present for his fiancée!" Her expression turned pleading as she tugged at his arm again. "Can you tell me what he got? I promise I'll keep it a secret! Pleeeeease, onii-sama?"

She was so excited that she didn't even see the glum expression return to her brother's face.

That's right, Eiden sighed. Quincy's supposed to marry Blood Kingdom's Princess Nikoretto next month...

Why did I fall in love with a guy who was already taken in the first place?!

"Stop shaking my arm, Mari, I'm not gonna spill."

"That's not fair! You're always keeping secrets from me!"

"I'll—I'll set up a tea party with you and Duke Octavius next week, all right?"

"Huh? Really?!"

"Yeah sure, 'cause his knight owes me a favor."

"Onii-sama you're the best!" And Mariko went straight into a back hug as she kissed him affectionately on the cheek.

Ring-a-ling!

The door opened. Mariko was still embracing Eiden as she welcomed their newest customer.

"Ohhh! Good afternoon and welcome to FamilyMart, Mister Commoner Customer!"

"Hehe, how may we help you today? P.S. there's a special sale on bottled tea!"

Eiden was still trying to pry her off him as he turned to face the door. "Enough Mariko, let go—"

And came face-to-face with a very familiar blonde man with brown eyes, dressed in very nice (but completely ordinary-looking) shirt and slacks. There was an inscrutable emotion storming in those dark irises as the male took in the sight of them both.

"Quin—" Eiden started but stopped. He knew better than anyone how much Quincy hated to parade his royal status around the city like some of the lesser nobles.

In this case though, it was closer to an admission of guilt. Quincy's eyes rested on his stricken face, then on Mariko's innocent expression, before turning on his heel and opening the door.

"Sorry, wrong store," he grunted.

Eiden was suddenly reminded of the fact that his parents had guarded Mariko so tightly since birth that her appearance was still a mystery to most of the world. We don't exactly look alike either. Hugging each other like this, did he think she was my...girlfriend?

"Have a nice day!" "Wait!" Both siblings chorused at the same time before Eiden shook Mariko off and started running after the male.

"Dammit Quincy, it's not what it looks like!"

[yichimi]

Hi <3 i will like to request like- how would the dorm (or just Azul, Vil, Kalim and Leona(Andjustifyouwant Ace and Deuce but it's not important at all)) will react if you said with an angry face "I know what you did" and insist until the character confess something, it could be anything but something, and don't worry, English it's not my first leanguaje as well, feel free to take your time or decline <3!

✨Thank you for your request and patience✨

"i know what you did" - with Deuce, Ace, Leona, Azul, Kalim and Vil

DEUCE SPADE:

Stares at you along time

He really tryst to remember what he could've done

He started to get so nervous about it and also started to make things up in his mind

Situations that never happened but he now believes are real

That's how nervous he is-

"Was it that bad?"

You jokingly nod trying to stay serious and then he lost it

"Whatever it was! I'm so sorry please let me make it up!"

And then he kinda continues about date ideas or buying you sweets and stuff just to apologize (for something that never happened)

In the end when you told him everything he was more than relieved but also said you should never prank him like this again because it fluffing damn gave him a Heartattack-

ACE TRAPOLLA:

he knows he does shit

And he's done a lot of it too

But recently he didn't do anything! At least HE thought he didn't

Then you stood up the morning and chose violence-

"I know what you did" you said trying to keep a straight face

"EH?!"

Thinks real hard but can't find anything in his memory that could've made you mad-because he apologizes always afterwards if you were involved

"I-I don't know-i really don't know! Was it because i ate your yogurt 3 weeks ago??? Did you found out now?"

Well the yogurt was new but-no it isn't something to he mad about really

You told him the truth and now he's mad at you-like how dare you scare him like that

But hands down, that was awesome!

Good job he's proud of you

But don't you dare ever do THAT again ON HIM

LEONA KINGDSCHOLAR:

well the only thing he really does is sleep when you two actually had a date or he was a bit way to honest with you

But you already are used to that

You still wanna pay him back so

Why not like this?

He just woke up 5 seconds ago because you threw a pillow right in his face and you said, "I know what you did"

He's thinking the best he can in a situation he just woke up-

Didn't really work

"what are you even fucking talking about?"

Fully believes he's innocent, which he is

But actually also has a clean mind-

After you told him the truth he ready-

You're standing beside his bed and he will grab you and use you now as a pillow if you want it or not

You gonna lay there for hours

"so troublesome, but i still love you"

AZUL ASHENGROTTO:

well-panic attack-

Was he not spending enough time with you?

Don't you like his presents???

DO YOU FEEL LIKE HE DOESN'T LOVES YOU?? Because he really does-

The angry look on your Face-Damm breaks his heart honestly

"I-I cant remember what i did-"

Because he literally didn't do anything he's such a sweetheart-

Ohhh i swear the comfort you have to give him is gonna be big-

Thinks real hard and can't find ANYTHING in his memories-

"it's a joke-!" You bubbled out and damn is he reliefed-so happy that he didn't do anything

But you did-and what you're gonna do next is cuddling and giving out the explanation why excatly you did this for his poor soul

KALIM AL-ASIM:

Oh bless his innocent soul

Besides all the partying and mess he does by accident, innocent

He does nothing wrong in your relationship except keeping you entertained and sporty

But a small little prank? Maybe-maybe it would be funny to see his reaction

And his reaction was that he started to laugh, no way he did something that bad. He didn't do anything in the last hours so it can't be it

But when you didn't laugh like he did...he worry's. Was really everything ok? Did he maybe hurt you by accident?

Panic

Starts to apologize so much you can't even understand him anymore

Jamil watching: (ಠ_ಠ)

"Kalim, I'm sorry! Its a prank!"

And then he's all happy again

A prank, of course it was one! He never does something bad!

VIL SCHÖNHEIT:

no one can shock this beauty that he starts to stress

Nothing and no one

But you can-and you know exactly how

Besides the 'make up is running out' situation or one of his brushes broke. Chill

But the moment you stepped into his room angry saying "I know what you did!" He was: ????

Tells you to calm down and tell him wHaT mR pErFeCt dId WrOnG

Nothing-

But you wouldn't tell him that

You kept on looking at him angry and he then and there starts to worry a bit

...what could he done wrong?

Spaces out a little so you gonna snap him out of it, "Prank-" you simply said-

You got kicked out-youre wasting time??!! Is make up honeyyyyy, it's more important than a prank

But not as important as you---

TWISTED WONDERLAND MASTERLIST

MAIN MASTERLIST

[aithusarosekiller]

CAT REG!!!!

Now, I know what you're thinking, 'Von, why did it take a week to write 800 words' but you see, there is this thing called procrastinating over absolutely everything you do

So it took a while

And isn't that great

But at least it's out of the way now

James ushered his friends in from the cold, shutting the door behind them and walking through to the living room.

“You lot want any drinks?”

“Yeah, sure, what have you got?” James thought for a moment, then shook his head and gestured for them to follow him through to the kitchen.

“Can’t remember for the life of me, the shopping came in earlier but I was out so Re-…the neighbours brought it in so I can’t remember what I ordered and what was substituted so it's probably best if you come and see for yourselves.”

They followed him and Pete jumped up onto the counter, sitting down and looking around at the countertop opposite. “You got any of that vanilla tea from before?”

Nodding, James opened the fridge and listed off what they had to the others, Remus decided quickly but Sirius decided to take their time, eventually getting distracted by a small black mass of fur trying to sneak out of the kitchen.

“Oi, Prongsie, I didn’t know you had a cat! How could you get a cat without us knowing? We were here two days ago!”

The cat froze and so did James, Peter looked between them, taking a bite of an apple he had grabbed from the fruit bowl to his side and looking very amused. Remus seemed to be trying to decode Pete’s look but it was to no avail.

James stood still for a few moments, looking almost petrified. “Ohhh, yeah. he isn’t my cat, he belongs to the neighbours, I just said I would watch him today because he’s new so they can’t leave him alone and I wasn’t expecting any guests so…”

Sirius nodded and stepped forwards, reaching out to stroke the cat, barely reacting when it hissed and dug its feet into the ground.

“Yeah, I thought as much. Can probably smell Padfoot from the walk here. Ah, well, cute little guy though.”

Peter snickered and James shot him a warning glance that heavily resembled his mother. Pete looked down and used his hand to muffle the laugh but it had already caught the attention of the other two.

“What? What is it?” Sirius stepped towards Peter, their face a mix of confusion, curiosity and disappointment. “What do you know that I don’t?”

Peter shook his head. “Nothing.” Sirius turned her head to James and raised an eyebrow.

“Dunno, don’t ask me. Pete’s probably just in one of his weird moods.”

“I don’t go in weird moods! I’m perfectly fine, thank you.”

Remus was looking between them all, seeming very confused and slightly wary, casting a few small glances towards the cat in suspicion. He had an idea of what could be going on but just couldn’t put his finger on it yet.

They all stood around as James went back to making the drinks, moving on the conversation swiftly.

As they all forgot about what had just happened, the cat seemed to give up on sneaking out and leapt up onto the countertop next to James, watching as he sorted out everybody’s drinks.

James instinctively gave the cat a small nudge towards the edge of the countertop. “Regulus, get off the count-” He only realised what he had said when he heard the others stop talking and go silent, staring at him with weirdly blank expressions, like it was still sinking in. The cat seemed to notice at the same time and slowly sat down on the counter, giving James a hard glare.

“What?”

He slowly turned around to face Sirius, offering an awkward smile and shrug. “What?”

“Why does your neighbours' cat have the same name as my brother?”

James stood with his mouth hanging open for a few minutes, desperately trying to make up an excuse.

“I mean Regulus does mean the heart of the lion, no? And a cat is a small lion so…”

That only seemed to make Sirius more suspicious. He narrowed his eyes and crossed her arms.

“Why have you been analysing the meaning of my brother’s name?”

James didn’t have an answer for that and Remus noticed what was happening.

“Ohh!”

Peter started to chuckle and the cat grew larger at James’ side, morphing into a young man with black hair that fell just past his shoulders and a smirk on his face. He had his legs crossed and an elbow on one knee, a hand holding up his chin.

“Well, this is going to be interesting. James, love, can you make me a cup too? Not decaf, I need the caffeine to get me through this argument I can sense approaching. Thanks, dear.”

He put emphasis on the pet names, eyes flickering to Sirius each time to try and spot her reaction.

“James…”

“Yes?”

“Why is your neighbours' cat my brother? And why is he calling you love?”

“I believe we may need to sit down for this.” He put an arm around Regulus’ shoulders and leaned closer to whisper into his ear.

“I actually hate you so much right now.”

“I know, darling, I know.”

[pigeonwhumps]

In Memoriam

Sanctuary masterlist

Whumpcember day 8: faked death

And

AMOW day 3: getting a letter in the mail

Taglist: @littlespacecastle @whumpymirages @flowersarefreetherapy @whumpcember @amonthofwhump

Finn calls his sister after she gets a leaflet through her door.

695 words + art

CWs: presumed dead, mentioned kidnapping, whumper pov, non-con, creepy whumper

Finn scowls at the picture of a flyer his sister's sent him. In memory of Samantha Young. Well, that's one way of ruining his appetite. He presses call.

"Do you like the photo?"

"What the fuck, Ashley?"

"It's your little Romantic. Isn't she cute?"

"I know what it is. I want to know why you sent it to me. And how the hell you have it."

"A rather upset young man put it through my letterbox. Apparently it would've been her thirtieth birthday on the 27th of July. I thought you could add it to your scrapbook of her."

"I have far better photos now. You remember the Christmas ones."

"Oh I do." She pauses, clearly thinking about it. "You know, I'd quite like that young man as a pet. Any chance you could..."

"No, Ashley. You know I don't go for men. Anyway, they wouldn't let you buy a pet who used to live in your city, you know that. Not unless it's a special order, with lots of money."

"Spoilsport. I bet he's related to your Romantic. Oh! Or he might be a boyfriend." She sniggers. "Imagine that little Romantic having a boyfriend."

He sighs impatiently. "Ashley. The girl on that flyer, Samantha whatever, is dead. Dead. She has been for over nine years. The Romantic I'm training now might look like her, but she's not. She's a pet. She doesn't have any friends or family, certainly not a boyfriend, and she's going to her new owner next week. She doesn't even have a brain anymore, her head's just full of obedience and ways to fuck well. Are we clear?"

"So that's why you're so grumpy. You're losing your favourite acquisition."

"Ash..."

"Fine, fine. I wasn't calling her a person."

"I know that. But better safe than sorry." He doesn't want anything to happen to his sister, after all.

"Hmm. Who's your Romantic's new owner?"

"A young Sri Lankan girl. The one who owns 065."

"Ohhh that's gotta be fun. Owning a bonded pair when one's forgotten the other. She must be some kinda sadist."

"What I don't get is why you'd give your Romantic another pet to possibly bond with. I mean, you'd think she'd want 643 entirely focused on her. I certainly would if I was her owner."

"I imagine there's plenty of fun to be had with multiple pets."

"Mm." There is, to be sure, but it's usually not as good as a pet's sole focus being you. "Anyway, I need to actually eat before I go to 643."

"Yeah, right. Enjoy."

"Oh, I will."

He cuts off and peels back the foil covering his limp ham sandwich. It looks... distinctly unappealing. He's not even hungry, really, not for this.

He knows what would be appealing though.

Finn shoves the sandwich back in his bag and jumps to his feet, a smile already spreading. Oh, he knows exactly what he's hungry for.

He strides down the corridors until he reaches 643's room and holds his keycard against the lock.

643 is kneeling beside the bed, wrists crossed behind her back, and she looks up at him demurely through her lashes as he enters. He hasn't seen her today, too busy with paperwork, and blood rushes to his cock at the sight.

"Good to see you can hold a position, 643. As you know, it's final checks this week. I need to ensure you're ready for your prospective owner. Position 22."

643 sits on her heels and tilts her head up, opening her mouth.

Finn nods approvingly. Technically this isn't a position she's likely to need with a female owner, but... maybe this Miss Anita Ranjit has a boyfriend. Or maybe she'll like to watch her pets fuck. Finn's job is to prepare 643 for anything her owner might give her, and that certainly includes a cock.

Finn unzips himself and inserts his cock into 643's gaping mouth. She's like a little bird, so eager for something to fill her up.

"Go on, suck it. Show me what a good girl you are."

643 starts working on him, and oh yes. This is a much better lunch than his ham sandwich.

[enhypia]

JW ; bestfriends to lovers

bestfriends to lovers answers questions with the choice of drinking instead of answering

pairings: yang jungwon x gn!reader

genre: fluff, angst if you squint

words: roughly 1.1k

masterlist ⸺ series masterlist

~guides and warnings~

italics - reader speaking

bold - jungwon speaking

[enclosed] - interviewer speaking

italicized bold - both reader and jungwon speaking

[enclosed bold or italics] - question (depends on who's speaking)

heavily inspired by: rec.create lie detector games, cut truth or drink

warning: contains and mentions of !!! drinking, swearing

i don't promote underage drinking, save your livers

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

hi i'm jungwon

and i'm (y/n)

and we're bestfriends besties

okay one more time

we're bestfriends to lovers!

*they high-five

[you guys were invited here today as bestfriends turned lovers for a fun little drinking game, you guys aware of that right?]

we were

i had to convince jungwon a little bit because he's a lightweight

i am not

you can just answer the questions instead of drinking anyway

i hope you get hard ones so you get drunk

*(y/n) :P

[okay, for this game, questions will be asked and if you refuse to answer, you drink, it's that simple. should we start?]

*both nod

[how did you guys become bestfriends?]

our parents forced us, we were threatened

*they laugh

no, our parents are friends and they had this little get-together and they brought their children with

yeah, that's why we were forced to interact

it was better than listening to our parents and not relating to anything

and they got so happy seeing us interacting that we were just always brought to their hangouts

[what was your first impression of each other?]

that jungwon wouldn't hesitate to kick my ass

you weren't wrong

i know. his eyes are very expressive, and i thought he hated me the first time we met

i did

sucks to suck then cause you're dating me now

*jungwon sighs deeply

*(y/n) :O

i thought they were shy

I AM ?!@#

uh huh keep telling yourself that honey

*(y/n) !!??!?

[how about we officially start the game now?]

*both nod and played rock paper and scissors to determine who gets to ask first, jungwon wins

*jungwon ohhhs after seeing the question

[was there a point where you wanted to end our friendship?]

why are we starting heavy already? gosh

sooo??

i'm answering. there wasn't?

WHY AREN'T YOU SURE??

becaUSE I HAD FEELINGS FOR YOU??? of course i didn't want just friendship, isn't that technically ending it? but from my understanding is end the friendship like completely cut ties off?

*interviewer nods

then no, there wasn't

*(y/n) quickly picks up the card and immediately laughs after reading the question

what? what is it

oh you better answer this cause even i don't know

[when did you start having feelings for me?]

*jungwon blushes and starts to pour a shot

yah!

i'm still answering! i just need this drink

*(y/n) laughs

i started liking you around prom....

*jungwon refuses to meet (y/n) widened eyes

that was almost 2 years ago?!@!

*jungwon ignores the claim

so you're telling me that we could've been together already two years ago ?!

*jungwon eyes widen and smirks

*(y/n) realizes their mistake

[so you already had a crush on me back then too?]

*(y/n) takes a shot sporting a blush and gives a pointed glare, then smiles innocently

i've liked you way before that darling, you just didn't notice

*jungwon.exe has stopped working

okay! next question

[have you ever been jealous of anyone who hit up on me?]

oh god, you wouldn't believe how much time i wasted constantly reminding myself that i have no right to be jealous

*jungwon laughs

what do they even see in you ugh

*he rolls his eyes

you're literally dating me

and what about it??

*jungwon :P

[have YOU ever been jealous of anyone who hit up on me?]

no why would i be?

damn thought for sure the reason you distanced yourself from me when-

*he clamps his hand on (y/n) mouth

we do not speak their name

*(y/n) laughs and pushes jungwon's hand off their face then picks up a card

[question for both: was it scary falling for your bestfriend]

*both share a look and takes a shot

it was terrifying. because you're risking this once in a lifetime friendship and bond you know? that's why i tried really hard to suppress what i was feeling because i couldn't stand the idea of loosing all those just because i liked the person.

*jungwon takes a shot making (y/n) laugh

it was super scary since we've been beside each other for years and i'd rather deal with the unrequited love?? because not having them by my side would be more painful than that

*(y/n) drinks

*both giggle because they're getting tipsy by drinking even though they still answer the question

[who confessed first? how did you guys get together?]

i confessed first. my parents were thinking of moving and i was panicking because i'd have to leave everything behind and in my head i didn't want to leave without jungwon knowing what i felt for him, so i just went 'fuck it, i wont see him again anytime soon anyway' and confessed.

and then they RAN straight home right after, i couldn't even reply??

I WAS SCARED GIVE ME A BREAK

yeah but they forgot that i literally have a key to their house, so i just went there and confessed as well.

and it turns out, we weren't moving, so tada, here we are

we got together after like a week since the confession

jungwon got jealous of-

*he puts a finger to (y/n) mouth to shush them

no❤️

*(y/n) chuckles

what's important is that i love you, you're mine and i am yours, period.

*(y/n).exe is malfunctioning because of jungwon's boldness and drinks

sorry, he gets more straightforward when intoxicated

im intoxicated, not drunk, so my words are true

*(y/n) can't fight the heavy blush appearing on their face

i swear if you don't shut off i will fight you

no you can't, you love me

*(y/n) deadpans and suddenly stares at jungwon lovingly

*pokemon jungwon is paralyzed!

i do, i love you so much.

*he squeaks and tries to hide the blush on his face

*(y/n) bursts out laughing

[last question, how does it feel being in a relationship with your bestfriend?]

it's amazing and kind of scary actually, jungwon knows me so well, and too well, so i can't escape anything from him. whenever i don't feel the best he just knows already without me saying anything. i'm thankful honestly, because he's always there ever since, the bonus now is just i get unlimited kisses and affection

*jungwon rolls his eyes

it's,,, comfortable ?? it's like the safety and comfort home brings. i just feel so understood and loved, sometimes i wonder if i really deserve all these but like (y/n), i'm just grateful that i have them with me.

*everyone in the room aww'ed making them laugh

*jungwon and (y/n) takes one last shot and waved to the camera

and CUT!

»————-　♡　————-«

bonus: youtube comments

a/n: im so hapi that the series masterlist is getting notes huhu tysm <33 i hope you like this one, ive always imagined jungwon as someone who flusters people but you can easily fluster him back, esp if you're his s/o, i'll try to create the rest of the members' as quickly as i can :>>

[peachyysugaa]

strawberry

― mukbang youtuber!nishimura riki x gn!reader

riki's at it again, and by it, i mean microwaving foods.

genre: humor, fluff, established relationship

wc: 1.2k

warnings: cw food/eating

part of my youtuber enhypen series, the 2nd upload! feel free to read on its own~ ♞──────────────────────────♞

"y/n! i'm warning you, i'm going live!" riki shouts from the living room.

"alright! i'll stay here, let me know when you're done!" his s/o replies in the same volume.

"okay!"

this was a frequent occurrence: you come over to riki's place, the two of you hang out, he needs to film something for an hour or so, you give him space, he finishes, and the two of you cuddle after. while some of your friends question your boyfriend and your lifestyle with him, you really wouldn't have it any other way. 2 and a half years of dating riki, you've been through it all together, so there's no push for a something different or more.

"okay... let's wait for a while, yeah?" riki directs to his audience, watching the chat feed slowly increase in comments. when it seems like enough people have shown up, a smile breaks out on his face. "hey everyone, it's me again!

"you probably already read the title, but yea, imma do it." he points the camera down to the array of strawberry items that will soon be put in the microwave. "i don't know how people eat cold strawberries—they have no flavor to them!"

you scoff to yourself when he says that, shaking the digital trees on your island for fruits to sell.

"try one to see if you like it?" riki reads out loud. "eyyy, if i don't like it, i don't, but i'll prove it to you anyway if there's anyone new watching."

true to his word, the cold strawberry goes right into his mouth, and he makes a face, the camera picking it up. you don't need to watch the live to know that your boyfriend's nose is all scrunched up right now, making you giggle at the thought of it in the next room.

"now that you know," he continues, holding up a plate of strawberries. "i'll be microwaving these now."

the microwave opens and shuts before making its beeping noises as riki presses the numbers and heats them up for a couple of seconds. when they're ready, he's quick to get them out and show them to the camera before enjoying the taste of the warm strawberries.

"mm!" you roll your eyes at the sound of his satisfaction. his dog bisco has made its way into the room and plops next to your side, you gladly petting the curly fur at some points.

after a couple minutes, it seems riki has finished the warm strawberries, because he's moving onto the next item: tanghulu-style strawberries.

"you all said that you wanted me to eat this, and since it's already—" he takes this moment to tap the crystal sugary shell. "like this, i guess i'll just dive right in."

the sounds of delightful crunching can be heard, not unnoticed by bisco, whose head tilts at the eating sounds. you chuckle lightly, scratching its head and making the dog lay its head back down.

"ohh, i know why you all wanted me to eat this," riki acknowledges. "it's like asmr, okay, okay."

he lowers his voice and starts speaking like the asmr videos he's seen with you. "i think i'll microwave it just to taste," he whispers into the mic.

with that, the same microwave sounds of beeps and doors are repeated. "oh shoot, the sugar is making it stick to the plate," riki comments with a laugh, making you snort quietly. "i'll just..." he trails off, using a fork to free the sugary treat from the plate before plopping it into its mouth.

"oh! i like this better too! sorry, no crunching sounds for you," he laughs at the disappointed comments who wanted to hear the satisfying crunch of the tanghulu. "alright, next up... strawberry jam!"

instead of the usual glass jar it resides in, riki lifts up several small packages taken from food places as condiments. "i didn't wanna buy a whole jar—the tanghulu was expensive for no reason! plus, these are free, what can go wrong with free things?" a lot, apparently.

as by routine, he lifts up the wrap of the packaging and punches the back of it to immediately taste the jam. "hmm... it's alright, i guess."

riki lifts his head to read a comment. "huh? what's wrong with taking it straight like that? you know, jay hyung does worse, right?"

you giggle to yourself at the mention of one of his youtuber hyungs as you continue multitasking and listening.

"oh yeah, that reminds me. he did a video with his s/o, it was soo funny!" the youtuber laughs. "poor hyung, he said the manuca honey was so bad, he didn't want to eat honey for a week! go check out his channel after this and watch the video.~

"well, jay hyung needs to thank me for his free promo or whatever. it's time to microwave this noww," riki continues. it's going like normal: the microwave door opening and closing, the beeps of setting the time. but then it isn't. after a couple of seconds of heating, some loud pops are heard, and riki is shouting and laughing at the same time.

you and bisco shoot up and immediately rush to the scene. "riki! what is going on?!"

he turns around with a sheepish smile just as the microwave beeps to signal its end. pointing at the microwave, you notice the stains of strawberry jam on the door and groan out. you walk towards the kitchen and open one of the cabinets to take out the cleaning supplies, failing to notice that you had walked in front of the camera.

the comments go crazy with questions, and riki realizes he hadn't turned off his live, connecting the dots. he's quick to pull you into the frame with a beaming smile on his face. "well, this isn't the best way to go about it, but since you accidentally revealed yourself, i guess i'll say it: this is my s/o y/n, everyone!"

you blink owlishly, clutching the clorox wipes close to your chest with riki's arm around your shoulder. "huh?" you ask before the lightbulb in your head goes off. "ohhh! oh my gosh, hi?!"

you and riki had talked about the subject of your reveal before, but the how was always the reason you had never done it. with the accident, you guess this was the how now. you're laughing with riki at the whole situation as the comments flood with how cute the two of you are together. "riki! we need to clean the microwave before your parents come back," you playfully scold.

"oh right," he agrees before turning back to the camera. "well, two-in-one, everyone: strawberry mukbang goes wrong and my s/o revealed! see you next time!"

the two of you wave to the camera as the audience wishes you farewell and riki finally shuts off the live.

"you're a mess," you tease him, getting an eye roll in response.

"yeah, yeah, let's just clean up, okay?"

"how does this even happen? what physics is this?" you wonder aloud, opening the microwave to start cleaning.

"huh, maybe i have jake hyung's next idea for a video."

a/n: i wrote this in 20 minutes how 😀 i hope you all enjoyed this it's been a while since i wrote for riki hehe but i still judge him for warm strawberries LOL