#oh wait whoops I didn't mean to post this yet

[royalarchivist]

Phil: And then we put one there... Perfect!

Missa: That's good enough.

Phil: Come to bed... uh, partner *loses it*

Missa: *cracking up* Sure thing, bro.

Phil: [deep voice] "Sure thing, bro, thanks." Right next to our son, to keep a watchful eye.

Bonus:

[restinslices]

I really liked your post for LKBS parents. Can I request more HC about them as parents?My main idea was what they would be like with a girl or boy who tends to behave quite badly, but you can do it however you want if you decide to answer this :3Thanks in advance. Your blog is very entertaining :D

Here you go bookie. Also I broke a thumb nail and my typing is so off now😔

May the Elder Gods give him strength-

Bi-Han has such low patience and a kid that acts bad would drive him insane 

Especially if this child is the first born and therefore has to be the next Grandmaster? Oh boy 

Imma be real with y'all, I can see him whooping his kids-

Y'all know how people debate on whether or not whooping your kids is okay? I think he's on the pro whooping side. Not ABUSE tho. There's a line there 

“give me my belt” type shit. Very much a black mother-

If his kid wanna act up, then he's making life terrible 

He's pulling all the stops. They ass ain't going NOWHERE. 

Oh they wanna sneak out? Aight. He's boarding up the window. He's boarding up the front door. He might even take their own door off 

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes 

He's already a strict dad, so acting out will really get him heated 

Kids are assholes but I think there's a difference between regular kid shit and making life way more difficult than it has to be 

The type of parent to make his child sit next to him for the whole day. He's not playing with them 

He's escorting them to school and escorting them back home 

They legit have no freedom until they're over this phase 

And cursing at him? Absolutely not. 

This man does not argue with children at all. The going back and forth shit ain't happening. If you wanna act like a toddler that needs to be watched, then he'll treat you as such 

“I don't wanna be out here anymore” the teenager next to him sulked with their arms crossed and their mouth in a deep frown. Wrinkles spread from their frown and their pulled down eyebrows. How they hadn't gotten a headache yet, he was unsure of. 

Bi-Han ignored them, so they repeated themselves louder. “I don't wanna be out here anymore! Did you hear me?!”. 

Bi-Han didn't spare a glance at them. He turned a page in his book and said in a dangerously calm voice, “control your emotions before I let mine loose. What you want is irrelevant now. If you don't want to sit, then stand”. The teenager huffed and slouched more in the seat. 

“Is there something you'd like to say?��� he said in response to them mumbling something under their breath. They knew better than to repeat themselves, and stayed silent. 

Not dealing with that shit at all 

Do I think he has more patience than Bi-Han? Yes 

Does that mean he'll deal with disrespect? Absolutely not 

It's not even the rebellious acts that bother him. He knows teens will be teens. It's the disrespecting him that pisses him off 

He's also not going back and forth with nobody 

Arguing isn't happening. At some point he's just finna start handing out groundings 

Since they have so much energy when they're doing all that extra shit, he has them train more 

Keeps them incredibly busy so they're too tired to do anything stupid 

Not entirely foolproof but it works 99% of the time

Has no problem taking away their door if they're always up to bullshit 

Lowkey I can see any of them pulling up to the school if his kid is acting up there too 

Will forbid them from seeing any of their bad acting friends 

He cannot wait until this phase is over. He is EXHAUSTED 

The teenager collided with the hard ground under them and winced. Their breath was knocked out their lungs and they glared at the older man that knocked their feet from under them. 

“Again” Kuai Liang said sternly and stepped back. The teenager stayed on the ground and crossed their arms over their chest in defiance. 

“So I can get knocked down again? No thanks! And you can't make me!”. Kuai Liang rolled his eyes. He put his hands on his hips and looked down at the teenager, that acted more like a toddler with each passing day. 

“You're right. I can't. Well if you won't do this, then I won't give you any of your privileges back-”

“Wait-!”

“No no” the older man walked towards their house with the teenager quickly jumping to their feet to catch up with him. “You can tell me all about what I can't make you do over dinner”

Exhausted 

He just wants to live life without hearing bullshit in his ears 

Tries to figure out what the problem is but when he finds out they're just being a brat to be a brat, he's at a loss for words 

He assumes that maybe he said or did something and the acting out was a result of that 

He didn't know they're just in an asshole phase 

He has hope that this phase will end soon, so he doesn't react immediately 

Once the week is up he's like “they're still going? Damn. Now I gotta be strict”

In one of the dialogues he said his mom was no nonsense and tough as nails so I can see him trying to embody her spirit and do what she would do 

It probably surprised his kid that he starts actually being strict with them and raising his voice

He's the most chill parent out the 3 so the strictness is a switch up they weren't expecting 

Groundings getting handed out like coupons 

They're losing any privileges they have 

He doesn't enjoy making life miserable for them but he can't NOT parent them 

Hoping the phase ends soon 

“What?!” The teen exclaimed. “You can't ground me!”. 

“Why not?”. The teen had no answer. They just stammered nonsensical sentences that Tomas didn't care to hear. He kept trying to be patient with them, but everyone has a limit, and he had reached his. 

“I keep trying to hear you out but you don't wanna talk-”

“We can talk now!”

“You're right! We can talk after you hand over all your electronics and anything else you've been hiding in your room! Now!”. 

By the end of the day Tomas cleared their room of anything that resembled fun. Needless to say, his kid was far from pleased. It was fine though. They'd look back on this time soon enough and be embarrassed by their actions. 

Or so he hoped. 

[stargazing15]

Now that we meet again

Bradley Bradshaw x you

Summary: For five summers you were Bradley’s summer love (aka each others first love), until he joined the Navy. What would happen when you two stumble unto each other at the Hard Deck 15 years later?

Warning: no use of y/n, mention of alcohol consumption, teasing, smut, oral (f receiving), p in v, protected sex, adult banter. Minors DNI 18+

A/N: saw this post from @roostersforevergirl and got the idea. This is long, whoops, I am not sorry at all

Enjoy! ❤️

You had to blink twice, after your initial thoughts got confirmed by hearing the name.

“Bradshaw, you gonna take the shot or what?” Bradley had noticed you too and started to make his way over, after shoving the pool cue in the blond haired man’s hands.

“It is really you. Wow, long has it been? You look good, no, you look fucking great Bubbles.”

“About 15 years I guess. B, you aged well too. Where did that cute babyface go?” The hug was more than welcome. “God I missed you.” As you were about to tickle him, you weren’t feeling the soft belly under your fingers that you were used to feel, but rock hard yummy abs.

“Liking what you feel?” Oh Jesus that smirk combined with those puppy eyes, he still knew how to get to you. Definitely no alcohol tonight as you wanted to make sure to remember every single second clearly.

“Hell yeah, the scruff too. These muscles and the fact you didn't coming back during the next summers, does that mean you did it?” 

“Yup, Lieutenant Bradshaw at your service.” He said after taking a sip of his beer, of course letting a droplet beer escape and drip down his lip, to his chin, down his neck, okay, you were a goner already.

“Hmm, you know I like men in a uniform, care to introduce me to those hunks over there? Seems my colleagues already ditched me.” He smirked at your first remark.

“One sec Bubbles, just so I know I wouldn’t cross a line. Since I don’t see a ring, any boyfriend I need to watch out for?” He actually was right to ask that as you were about to flirt shamelessly with each other for the rest of the evening.

“Nope, still waiting for you B,” you teased. “And on your side? So my eyes wouldn’t get scratched out.”

“Same, I was searching for you. Let me introduce to that bunch of idiots I call friends.”

“Bradshaw, since you brought the lovely lady over, apology accepted. Hangman is the name, but you can call me Jake.” The blonde one winked.

“Hangman, stuck in kindergarten?” He had never expected that answer from you while displaying your cutest face.

“Callsign darling. Please don’t tell me you’re his sister or something?”

“Ew no.”

“Bagman shut it.” Bradley introduced you to the group and vice versa.

“B, you have a callsign too?” Everyone told you theirs, but Bradley stayed awfully quiet next to you.

“He hasn’t told you yet? It’s one close to his father’s, to honor him and he's always the first one up, Rooster.” You choked on the water you were trying to drink. They all knew now with certainty, that was not the complete story behind his callsign.

“You’ve got to be shitting me B.”

“Darlin, you know the real story?” The blonde one asked you. You looked with a little mischievous smile at Bradley. Trying to warn you, Bradley signalled you with his eyes.

“Oh come on B, don’t give me that look, don’t they deserve to know?”

“Bubbles, pretty please?” And like that puppy eyes appeared again, but you were enjoying this way too much knowing his mind and dick were about take a little trip down memory lane.

“Wait, you’re THE Bubbles?” Natasha, the only girl in the group you learned, asked you/ screamed for the whole group. “Tell me ALL the juice. But you can start with his callsign.”

“I’m gonna get a drink before I die from embarrassment.” Bradley excused himself from the group. Just to stand at the bar a couple of feet further, still able to hear everything.

“Okay, one evening, we had a couple of drinks, he was telling me about his father’s job and about callsigns. I knew about his desire to become an aviator. So we were trying to find one fitting for him. And Bradley with his big dick energy, do I need to tell more?”

“Oh my god, you two fucked?” Mickey as you remembered right, shouted.

“Bubbles, it was your favourite hobby during the summers as I remember right?” If he wasn’t shameless anymore, you were definitely not going to hold back anymore.

“Oh B, you know I love your massive dick.” The group was in awe on your reaction.

“S-so, how did you get your nickname, Bubbles?” The most innocent one of the group asked you, trying to chance the subject. He did not know, you were about to corrupt him further.

“Lost a bet and got Bubbles tatted on my butt, I always liked her.” You immediately noticed Jake eying your butt, as if he could see through your jeans. “Wanna see cowboy?”

“Hell yeah darlin.”

“Oh hell no, over my dead dick, uh body.” Bradley took a sip of his glass from embarrassment. You went closer to Bradley and stood in front of him, blocking the view from the others.

“Don’t tell me you already jerked off in the bathroom?” You whispered in Bradley’s ear while slowly letting your fingers trace down from his abs to your favourite merchandise in his pants and of course giving it a soft squeeze, making Bradley grunt.

“Well, your fault for looking this good.” After your little stunt he placed one leg between yours, letting his thigh touch with your clothed core, making you wanted to grind on him already. The moment your pelvis shifted a little to feel some friction, he removed his leg and joined Bob and Micky on the other side of the pool table, leaving you behind already hot and bothered. "Dickhead." You growled

“So, tell me more about younger Bradley, sorry, but we are in desperate need of blackmail material.” You were joined by Natasha and Rueben, after Bradley ditched you.

“Ooooh, I still have pictures on my phone, I think they’re somewhere in my cloud. One sec.” You kept your pictures together always close, let’s be honest, because he was and still is the love of your life. Only for five summers you got to call him yours.

Your face lit up the moment you found the pictures you were looking for. “Here, this was I think 16 years ago. And here, this one, from our last summer. This babyface is the same Bradley as the one standing over there.”

“I never imagined him being a little, chubby? But good chubby. You know he talked about you when we were deployed? When we are deployed, we all get sappy.”

“He was the cutest, too sad we lived so far away from each other during the rest of the year back then. What did he say about me?”

“It was always, back then Bubbles this and Bubbles that. And I don’t know if I should say this, but he referred to you as the one who got away. You were not just his first love, also the love of his life.”

“Nat is right. He was never able to keep a girlfriend, there was clearly always someone else on his mind.”

“Guys, I just met you and you two seriously trying to make me cry?”

***

“Rooster, man, you two are too obvious.” Mickey patted on his back.

“She’s ... really hot, I knoooow.” Bradley slurred.

“How many did you have already? You’re drunk and dumb. You two are so in love with each other. You realize that right?”

“Yeah.” He sighed.

“Come on, Rooster, this was your chance, why did you fuck it up by getting drunk?” Bob tried to make him aware of his mistake. Bob signalled you to come over with a sad expression.

“I’m so sorry your reunion night has to end like this, but he’s too drunk to keep him here, it’s been years since he’s been this drunk. I'm so sorry he's like that."

“You don’t have to apologize for his actions Bob, you are too kind. Can you help me with his address, I’ll drive his car, I came by cab.”

“I don’t think that’s possible, no one else but him can drive his Bronco.”

“He still has that thing? Don’t worry, I’ve driven it before. Ain’t that right B? I helped a bit with fixing it back in the days.”

“What? My Bronco gets to touch you first, I’m mad at her.” Bradley drunkenly grumbled.

“Jesus B, shut up before you’re about to embarrass yourself further.”

“Can you handle him on your own darlin?”Jake asked, coming out of nowhere.

“Not my first ride with drunken Bradley. It was nice meeting you all. Probably till a next time!”

After they helped you with loading Bradley in his Bronco and typing in the address, you were finally alone with him. Alone, with drunk Bradley, or so you thought.

“This was not how I imagined our reunion would end B.” You mumbled quietly. Not wanting a quiet ride, you put on one of cassettes you found on the dashboard. “Still the same music? Not much has changed apart from your appearance B.” Bradley hummed in response.

“Almost there, just don’t get sick and puke in your own car.”

“Never.” He sat up, stretched himself and suddenly did not look and sounded drunk at all.

“What the fucking hell! Dipshit, we left your friends because of you, they were all so nice.” You smacked the back of his head, making Bradley hiss in return.

“Eyes on the road Bubbles.”

“But what the fuck B, why this stunt? What were you drinking all night? You’re an idiot!” You were done raging by now.

“Feeling better?” You nodded as you parked his Bronco. “Penny, the nice bartender, she’s a good friend of us, she asked about you. And then noticed that you were having a nice time with the group. I might have said something about how always took care of me when I had a little too much to drink and she might have helped me with giving me apple juice.”

“Oh my god, you want me all for yourself. You didn't hear this but I love selfish Bradley. Come on, lead the way.”

Bradley’s house was unexpectedly … cute and cosy. “B, I love this place.” Oh god, he sneaked up behind you, just like the old days. His scent has changed, this was better, more manly, even more intoxicating than it ever was. His hands now on you waist, re-exploring the form of your body, his lips already planting kisses on your neck. The outline of his hardened dick already noticeable on your back. 

Bradley hurriedly turned you around and pressed your back against the wall, taking your face in his big hands. His nose was touching yours as he was staring in your eyes.

“I missed you so much.” Before you got the chance to say anything back, his lips were on yours, his tongue immediately demanding entrance. Your arms sneaked around his head, occasionally gripping on his locks. You both got flashback to those hot summer nights, making out in one of your bedrooms. Those memories and your bodies being pressed together made you moan, loud.

Bradley heard you and let go of the kiss, only to start attacking your jaw and neck with needy, wet kisses while hurriedly trying to discard your blouse, but he was stuck somewhere. You placed your small hands on his big ones to make him stop destroying your clothes.

“B, stop, take a breath.” He looked so lost at your words, eyes still blown with lust. He was doubting himself on the inside. Was he wrong to think you wanted this too? You two were flirting non stop with each other the whole evening. And when he kissed you, you definitely kissed back, he was sure you were enjoying it a lot.

You placed your finger on his lips and let your other hand that was still on top of his, slide in his hand. Slowly you guided him to his sofa while walking backwards, not breaking eye contact. Once Bradley was seated, your finger let go of his lips. “You really look cute confused B.”

“But I am Bubbles, I thought that you l-”

“Stop thinking and start feeling.” You seated yourself on his lap facing him and placed his hand on your heart and so did you with your hand on his heart. “Let’s do this again.” This kiss was not hurried, it was slow and tender. You and Bradley had kissed a lot in the past, and was passionate many times, but never like this. Every kiss, every touch, every time you and Bradley fucked were burned in your memory. Your heart had never be able to let go of him and tonight you were going to let him know. When you broke off the kiss to catch your breath, you noticed how wet you got from just kissing him. Yes, you wanted him to take you here and now, but you had waited so many years for this, so this moment had to be the most memorable one.

“But I don’t want you to leave after tonight Bubbles, I’ve been so dumb for not coming back or searching harder for you after not coming back-“

“You really only think with that big dick of yours? Have you not listened tonight?” Bradley shot you the same confused look as earlier, but with a slight smirk at the mention of his dick. “I” kiss “was” kiss “at” kiss “the” kiss “bar” kiss “with” kiss “colleagues” kiss, you tried to deepen the kiss, but Bradley backed his head and kept looking at you confused.

“Colleagues? Work?” You hoped those words would start to make sense.

“I really am not getting it Bubbles.”

“Jesus B, you are stationed here right?”

“Yes, permanently.”

“I work in the city. I live here too B, since 10 months and I am staying here, permanenly.”

“Oh”

“I’m not going anywhere B.”

“Never going to let go of you again.” He lifted you up with him and walked with you clinging onto him to his bedroom. “You are not allowed to leave this house for the next two days.”

“Uh, underwear?”

“If I remember right, you look good in mine, but I doubt you will wear anything during those two days. Because we,” he threw you on his bed, “are going to make up for all the time we lost.”

Bradley still being the big tease he is, slowly got out of his shirt and tossed it somewhere on the ground. Your mouth fell open at the sight in front of you, you had already felt it, but seeing him being this ripped, looking at you with his sinful eyes and sweet jesus that massive stick visible in his jeans, you were officially done for any other man.

Bradley crawled on top of you, opening your blouse button by button and kissing the newly exposed skin before opening the next button. When the last one was opened you helped him get rid of your blouse. Next he opened the button and zipper of your pants, letting it slowly lower on your legs. “Have you got any idea how beautiful you are? You’re so fucking perfect.”

Bradley returned to pepper kisses all over your body while his hands roamed over the rest of your body. He made this moment feel so intimate and perfect. When he was satisfied with his kisses on you, he turned his attention to your boobs, letting his fingers trace over the lace covering them. “As much as I like it, I think I might like more what’s underneath it, can I?”

“Please B, your lips feel so good on me.” He didn’t need to be told twice to remove your bra and toss on the other side of the room. He started to kiss each boob first before turning his attention to your nipples. He skilfully took one bud in his mouth and let his tongue make love to it, the sensation going straight to your already dripping core. He had only just begun and you were already a moaning mess under him.

Bradley sat up after taking care of your other nipple too, admiring your needy look under him. You never used to like this quiet moments, but with Bradley, he made you feel like a goddess.

After contemplating for a minute what to do first, Bradley decided something was missing on you and he went back to kissing your neck and collarbone again. His kisses weren’t going to give him the result he wanted so he started sucking your skin in between kisses right under your collarbone to leave a mark he will be able to admire the rest of the weekend.

“B, please … something.” you moaned under his touch and kisses.

“Enlighten me Bubbles.”

“Your mouth, on me, lower, ooh.” He yanked your panties off, your sweet moans were now making it impossible for him to keep up the slower pace he was trying to maintain.

“Fuck you’re so wet for me babe. So, so perfect, all for me.” He settled himself comfortably between your thighs, letting his hot breath ghost over your wetness. After a needy whine escaped over your lips, he stopped admiring you and kitten licked your slit first and your clit a couple of times. He let his tongue explore what you liked and found a good rhythm softly circling your clit, making the heat inside your body rise more and more, getting you closer to your pending orgasm. Deciding not to let wait any longer for your high, Bradley gently inserted two fingers in your needy core. He moaned when your walls already started to clench around his fingers. You were so lost in the trance Bradley had put you in, that you couldn’t hold anything back anymore. You started to buck your hips a little to make his fingers hit the spot that made you see stars immediately. The little movement of your hips added more pressure from Bradley’s tongue on your clit, what made you scream out his name. As soon as he increased the speed of his fingers in combination with the circling motion of his tongue on your clit, you felt the heat building up in your belly reach its high and the muscles in your butt and abdomen tense. And then, it all exploded, your insides squeezed the hell out of Bradley’s fingers, a firework went off in your belly and your mind was on the fluffiest cloud possible.

Bradley pricked your wonderful bubble open by starting to kiss the Bubbles tattoo on your butt. "Missed you beautiful girl. Only you." Good thing his obnoxious smirk betrayed his intentions.

“You dick.”

“Hear that buddy, she loves you.” He said to his proudly erected dick.

You put up your biggest eyes and a pouty face "You want me to lick your lollipop B?" You licked your lips in the process.

"Oh yes please."

Your expression changed to an apologetic one "Too bad I'm not in the mood for a lollipop, I think you only look good between my thighs." You took his dick in your hands and teased him by pumping in an extreme slow motion. He threw his head back when he felt your hands on him and groaning at your slow speed. "You only get to enjoy when you're inside me" you winked, "punishment for not searching for me harder."

"Fuck Bubbles, come here." He closed the gap between you with a sloppy kiss. His hands back on your boobs as soon as you laid on your back. Maybe your heads hitting each other for a second when you landed on the bed. You couldn't hold back a little laugh as Bradley was still clumsy when he wanted to hurry something.

"Remember we have time B, no hurry or one of us might get injured." You joked with a little mischievous smile. "But I've got to admit can't wait to have you inside me."

"Fuck Bubbles. Got mouthy over the years. I like that." He moaned in between kisses. He started to lower his kisses to your neck, to your boobs and eventually to your stomach while gripping your thighs with his wonderful hand throughout his kissing-spree.

"God, B. The scruff feels wonderful, thought the Navy wouldn't allow that." It did tickle your stomach lightly.

"Unfortunately not, thought to try it on my time off. Will keep my stache. That will never disappear. Do you want me to grab a-" He said while signalling to his top drawer of his night stand.

"Maybe, yeah, I think I'm clean, I always have been careful, but I don't want to risk, you know for the Navy. Sorry for being a little party pooper. Going to make an appointment first thing in the morning." During your sudden rambling Bradley had already taken a condom and torn the package open with his teeth. He rolled it over his very erected dick and started to position himself in front of your entrance, until he noticed you suddenly changing attitude.

"Don't go all shy on me now Bubbles."

"It's not that, might sound weird, but I just got this nostalgic feeling. I wanted to cherish it for a moment."

"Good, but we're going to make it better." He positioned himself in front of your entrance and slowly pushed his cock inside you.

"F-fuck B, so big, easy p-please." You panted, trying to adjust to his size, a small tear appeared on the brim of the eyes.

"Had any decent dick after me?" He started to play with your boobs again to make the adjustment somewhat easier.

"Fuck no, your lovestick is the best." One thing your learned during the years you and Bradley fucked: praise his big dick, the more you fuel his ego, the lovelier it gets for you.

Your remark unleashed his ego and he accidentally bucked his hips, making you moan loud in the process. "Shit sorry Bubbles."

"Keep going, fuck it feels so wonderful. Oh." You didn't mean to, but the sounds escaping your mouth sounded like a needy little bitch. That was the effect Bradley had on you, make you loose complete control.

Bradley started to thrust, deep and slow thrusts. Only grunts and moans were escaping your mouths, even Bradley managed to keep his dirty mouth shut. All because you were both enjoying this way too much. For the first time in your history with Bradley, he was making love to you. If he had done it like this the last time 15 years ago, he would have probably snuck you into his bag when joining the Navy.

His thrusts were still slow and deep, but he managed to go a little harder the second he managed to hit your spot. You were getting close again, very close. You moaning his name over and over again as you were meeting his thrusts while bucking your hips slightly.

"Close too Bubbles, fuck, you're so, ah, so good. Let go." And you did exactly as he asked, he sped up lightly and made your orgasm hit you like a truck. Just like that, your body fell limp due to to intense contraction of all of your muscles. It felt weird this intense, yet so wonderful. Seconds after you Bradley came too, screaming your name, not Bubbles. Hearing your name roll over his lips like that, damn. You were still in a haze from your own orgasm, but hearing was as icing on the cake. Life was perfect now.

Two minutes had passed and you were both still laying knocked fucked out on the bed, your hands had found each other and intertwined. "Wow, I always thought they exaggerated in movies after the mind blowing sex that we never get to see. But now I understand. I'll be right back." Bradley took the condom he had removed after collapsing on the bed and came back a bit later with a warm washcloth to take care of you.

"Thanks B, I don't think I am able to walk for a bit." You smiled shyly.

"That good huh?" He joined you again on the bed, giving you your panties and one of his his large shirts after getting in his boxers. He kissed you softly before laying down in front of you, so you could stare at another.

"Hmm, let me think, did I have better? Oh maybe that one ... nah, oh bit a couple years ago, he was good .. but nah. Oooh fifteen years ago, that guy was something. Oh wait. Just kidding B, you have always been the best for me and this was the best yet. No one has made me cum with his dick only."

"I love you." Bradley blurted out, he was shocked at his own words. He was planning on telling them, just not yet. He wanted to bring up some good memories first, talk a bit, cuddle, spoil you, maybe make you confess first. But the words were out before he knew it.

You moved closer to Bradley and laid one hand on his cheek while planting your lips on his. "I love you too B, always have."

A little tear appeared in his the corner of his eyes. "B, are you crying? Is something wrong?"

He quickly wiped away the tear and smiled. "Fuck no, everything is alright, even more than alright. Hearing those words, I can get used to hearing them .

"Bradley, I love you too. I love you. I love you. I love you." And you ended your mantra with a peck on his lips.

"Hmm, in for a treat sweetheart? Spoiling me like that." Bradley already disappeared under the sheets, holding your hips down, ready to go down on you again. This was going to be the most memorable weekend of your life and finally the start of Bradley and you.

Taglist: @mrsjaderogers @mavrellover91 @cycbaby @bradleybeachbabe @iamdannyday @rhirhikingston @luckyladycreator2 @xoxabs88xox @mak-32

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Let me know what you think!

[mariyekos]

So this headcanon is of the crack treated seriously variety but-

Lately I've been thinking about Trish accidentally forming a demonic contract (bond of servitude) with Dante post DMC1 without either of them realizing it at and the shenanigans that would produce.

The idea is that post DMC1 Dante takes her on as an actual employee at Devil Never Cry to get her used to the human world. As part of his attempts to keep a semi-legitimate business for the non-demon hunting front, he has her sign some typical employee contract stuff. Except as it turns out Dante is apparently demon enough for it to trigger the sort of bond of servitude that is normally formed when a demon swears themself to a higher demon, which neither of them even considered as a possibility when they signed away. If you wanted to go further for it, you could say that Dante also nicked himself while preparing the documents and didn't feel like reprinting everything so he just left the page with the bloodspot in the packet, which Trish didn't notice because she doesn't really care about human formalities and immediately flips to the page she has to sign. But a drop of blood is still blood, meaning the contract is a blood contract, and oh will that bite them in the butt later on.

Like I said before, they don't even realize what's happened at first because Trish has always felt weird around Dante from a combination of the Sparda-pizzaz and potential Eva influence Mundus might've put into her. Her feeling a different sort of weird around Dante after signing the contract- maybe she feels some sort of pull or extra loyalty- she'd just chalk up to a potential side effect of being modeled after his mother. It's not until Dante tells her to go do something neither of them want to do as a joke and she actually does it without hesitation that the two pause, go "wait what" and start to investigate. Because Trish did not want to do that, but did it anyway. Because she felt compelled to in a way that overrode her personal desires. Which results in them realizing that oh, Trish can't actually disobey anything Dante orders her to do, and that is Not Normal.

Trish is, unsurprisingly, not happy about this. She's the one that brings up the contract thing, which Dante tries to deflect from by saying he didn't realize anything would happen, it's just a standard human practice! I think if Trish brought up the "well normally it needs a blood contract" thing Dante would twitch in just the right way that has her grilling him for more information, leading to the reveal that oops! She did sign a blood contract! Dante's laziness lead to Trish ending up as a servant yet again!

Dante would promise to never use it and never order her to do something, but I think it would take Trish a while to get over it. It really was an accident. He didn't mean to do that; doesn't want that kind of control over her or anything. He's sincere and means it when he says he will never ever tell or even ask her to do something again if that's what needs to happen for the contract-enforced servitude to activate. Eventually Trish would accept his apology with a grumble, but I see that as part of what would have her leaving DMC/DNC between DMC1 and DMC4 to do her own stuff. She's her own person and her own master. She doesn't want to be anyone's pawn anymore. Even if Dante says he doesn't plan to ever take advantage of the bond, she doesn't want him inadvertently doing anything to her or for herself to unconsciously follow. The contract should weaken with distance and time as long as they don't renew it, so she'll do her own thing most of the time, help out on the occasional mission, and eventually it'll all be in the past. By DMC5 the bond would definitely be broken, though I'm on the fence about whether in this verse it would be completely gone by DMC4 or just mostly gone.

But yeah! Basic idea is whoops Trish gets bound to Dante on accident and decides to peace our between DMC1 and 4 because neither of them really want that bond to activate and for Trish to get stripped of her will, even for something minor.

[sunberry-strawflower]

#curtissonweek2023

I have no excuse for being hella late. I was just procrastinating throughout the whole day😭😭I finished it thoo

This work is, like the last three, an entry for @blue-fanlady's curtisson week!

This one is just little over 1k words domestic curtisson where they literally share a house and everything and yet they're not married?? 🤨🤨 yea I'm gonna have to call bullshit (but yea I didn't make them married in this story sorry)

ALSO I'm just as tired as them in this story rn and I'm not gonna lie I wrote parts of this fanfic half asleep so‼️‼️whoops ‼️‼️I'll proofread once I wake up cause a little after I post this I'm going to bed (at...7am HEDJHFJR)

Word count: 1.2k

Curtisson Week Day 4: Sleeping

Burt was sitting on the couch in the living room of he and Sven's shared house with a book in hand. He had it open, but wasn't really paying too much attention to the story. It was mostly just to pass the time as he waited for Sven to come home from work. He looked back at his watch. 9:43pm. That's around the time Sven got off, so he should be home soon.

Burt was lucky enough to be sent off of work early. Though he was kind of upset at the same time because usually he and Sven got out of work around the same time (Sven getting out about 30 minutes after him), so he never had to wait too long for him. This time, though, he was sent off three hours earlier than he usually was. He wasn't sure why, but he didn't question it. Time off work is time off work.

Though…maybe he should've offered to work the three hours anyway. Just so he'd have something to do.

Sven and Burt had moved in together fairly recently, so while all the necessary stuff were set, such as cooking supplies, a bed, a couch, dressers, etc, etc., they were still lacking some things that they were planning on getting once they had the time.

For now, though, most things involving entertainment weren't present. Aside from like, his phone and a few books. Which he was usually alright with. He was content just sitting there, drinking his morning coffee on their porch. "Like an old man." Sven would say. But it wasn't morning, nor was it really the time for you to be chilling out on your porch. Way too cold at night.

He was feeling a little tired, but he didn't want to sleep without his boyfriend in his arms, and chances are Sven felt the same way. Though, maybe doing a relaxing activity such as reading wasn't helping his case much. But eh, nothing much else to do that'll keep him distracted.

He decided that he might as well take a shower while he waited, so he set the hardcover down on the coffee table and went into their bedroom to pick out pyjamas. A loose orange shirt and pants fit nicely. He added some matching socks there too, for extra comfort.

Once he got in and out of the shower, he put his comfy pyjamas on, and went back into the living room. He sat back on the couch and tried to read the book again. It wasn't a bad story by any means, just not what he was in the mood for. Which he finally realized and decided to just scroll through his phone instead.

A few minutes later, he heard the front doorknob rattling and assumed that it was Sven. He turned off his phone, putting it on the coffee table in front of him, and looked towards the front door expectantly. He let a gentle smile appear on his face when he saw Sven walk in, closing the door behind him. “Oh, welcome back,” he said. “How was work?”

Sven moved to sit next to Burt on the couch. “It was fine,” he sighed. “How was yours?”

“The usual,” Burt replied. "Are you up for dinner?" He asked, tilting his head over at Sven.

Sven shook his head. "Too tired…can we just go straight to bed?"

Burt smiled softly at that and nodded. "Of course." He then stood up, expecting the other to follow him to their bedroom, which he did. They walked in and Burt turned on the lights so they could see better.

Sven flopped down face first on the bed, groaning as he hit the sheets, letting said sheets suppress his voice a little.

"Hey, hey, you have to at least take a shower first," Burt chuckled, gently lifting Sven up from the bed. The other grunted once more, but reluctantly agreed. He'd feel a lot more comfortable after a shower anyway. "I already took mine, so I'll just wait for you, yeah?"

Sven nodded, and waited for Burt to leave the room so he could have some privacy.

Burt patiently waited outside of their bedroom door, letting Sven finish doing his thing.

About 10 minutes later, he heard the clear. "Okay, you can come in now."

Burt opened the door and stepped back in, greeted with Sven looking much more comfortable. And adorable. "There you go. Let's get to bed, then." Ah, yes. The moment they've both been waiting for.

Burt turned out the lights and took Sven with him on the bed. He took his headphones and top hat off, putting them on top of the nightstand. Sven had taken off his own hat right after getting out of the shower so he didn't worry about it. They were both under the covers, lying next to each other. They were pretty close together already, but apparently that wasn't enough for Sven and he slid closer to Burt, before mildly gripping onto his shirt.

"Someone's clingy." He teased, leaving the other flustered. Burt couldn't help but snicker at this. His boyfriend had always been easy to tease. He never overdid it, though. Just whenever he really wanted to see his reaction. And Sven delivered every time.

Sven looked up at him, his cheeks pink from the proximity and the teasing. He stopped gripping on his shirt for a minute, instead just laying his palms on top of his chest. He kept letting his gaze wander to Burt's lips, and couldn't resist kissing him right then and there.

Burt was taken aback by the sudden kiss, but he wasn't complaining. Not at all. He closed his eyes and kissed back, letting his hand slide up into Sven's hair, twirling it around his fingers.

Sven found Burt playing in his hair to be very relaxing, and kept the kiss going for a little longer. He loved nights like these, where he could just lay down, cuddling and kissing his boyfriend after a long day of work. Without a care in the world. It felt amazing.

Unfortunately, the kiss had to come to an end eventually. Especially whenever a thing called oxygen existed. They both pulled away, letting out a soft breath as they did so.

Burt had stopped running his fingers through Sven's hair, now just resting his hand on his head. Sven buried his face into Burt's neck. "Can you…keep doing that?" He whispered into the crook of his neck.

Burt raised an eyebrow. "Doing what?" He asked.

"Combing your fingers in my hair…" he replied. "It feels nice."

Now it was Burt's turn to get flustered. Thank God Sven couldn't see the pink in his face, but perhaps he could tell anyway and he was just too sleepy to care or say anything.

"Okay…" he obliged and started to run his fingers through the others' hair again. His hair was always soft and well-kempt, making it nice to play with.

Sven relaxed even more than he already was, which was good for both him and Burt. It was nice seeing him not so tense.

Sven then placed a soft kiss on Burt's neck. Then another, and another. At first Burt tensed up from how sudden it was, but he slowly relaxed himself. Sven planted one more soft kiss onto his neck before nuzzling into it.

They both felt themselves begin to drift off. Neither of them tried to fight it. They let themselves fall into a deep sleep.

_______________________________________________________

So sleepy 💤💤 sleepy bfs :]

[scripted-downfall]

I was thinking about the movie Olympus Has Fallen recently --- if you haven't seen it, the basic concept is Die Hard in the White House... and if you haven't seen Die Hard, I'd look up one or both --- and my recent ATLA fixation decided to intervene. (I still haven't finished the show, but we don't talk about that; I know some things, and the rest are just details... right? Right?)

Anyway, I'm just thinking about something like this happening post-canon --- some kind of assassination attempt, or perhaps a coup intended to unseat Fire Lord Zuko and replace him with Azula or Ozai --- except it all self-destructs within two seconds because a) buddy's been putting his Blue Spirit skills to good use and b) he's been clamoring around on the walls outside to sneak around the palace anyway, just to get some free time.

He should have been in his office or something, but he wasn't, and so now no one knows where he is. His personal guards just sitting around like wtf do we do. we. have lost. the fire lord. this has never happened before. wtf. what do we do.

Instead of big, exciting fight scenes and sacrifices and hostage negotiation and stuff, everyone's just chilling in the room they're being kept in, utterly confused and 20 seconds away from busting out a deck of cards or something.

The entire plot is the bad guys sitting around staring at the shadows. wtaf. i swear something just moved there. oh wait, it's just a mask on the- wait wtf

The plan just entirely went to pot after two seconds, all because they apparently didn't register that an 18-year-old is not actually very inclined to be where he's supposed to be. Much less the rebellious banished prince of the Fire Nation who has had, simultaneously, a minimum of five "dead or alive" warrants placed on his head. By his own country.

Bonus points if Zuko is just kinda rolling with it, completely forgetting that people might be looking for him? That maybe he shouldn't just run head-first into battle? The first time he runs into a friend, they're still concerned because he went MIA in the middle of a coup, and he's just giving them the surprised Pikachu face. ("What are you doing here?" "Looking for you, idiot!" "...Why?" "Because there's a coup going on and people are trying to kill you?" "Yeah, but like. why?" "What do you mean, why?" "...The siege ended, like, fifteen minutes ago? I've been trying to find you." "... *facepalm*")

I don't yet know if I'm going to actually write this or not, but I find it funny so I have Absolutely No Choice but to ramble about it here... whoops :)

[dietraumerei]

Weekly Writing and Reading Update

Hello, the start of the Long Dark is upon me, which means I just want to sleep and read and then sleep some more in my dark little apartment. I'm not unhappy, just...restful. Which is great, but also I need to go grocery shopping and just, ew. Work was also exhausting this past week, so I am hoping the coming week is better, and I will feel like getting up and about a bit next weekend. (Also I'm getting a tattoo done next Sunday, so that'll be cool to look forward to!)

All of which is to say that in all ways but physical I am a small piece of moss on the forest floor, and I'm not mad about it.

Writing

Honestly I did nothing this week. It feels like overkill to say I burned out, but I simply...did not want to write, so I didn't. My mojo is starting to creep back, but it was awfully nice to just read the New Yorker of a morning.

That said, I finally posted the first chapter of Yet Another New AU, and I'm really pleased with this ranging story. I think I'll post updates once a week or two; I want to take my time writing this, and it's been nice feeling like I have time to proofread and rewrite as I go; I already had to start over once because I accidentally made Dily unlikeable, lol.

Anyway, here it is:

Beginnings

Reading

I finished When the Angels Left the Old Country after @lesbrarian recommended it and it might be my favorite book I've read this year? Top five, certainly -- it's tense and beautiful and funny and full of love and very Jewish, and it just filled me with joy to read, even the sad parts. The comparisons to Good Omens are unavoidable, but really I find it a very different story in a lot of ways, although certainly with connections. I adored it, and it's one of those books I can't wait to re-read. Also every time I think about the angel too much I want to cry, but in a good way.

I also -- finally, after many breaks -- finished The Path the Power, the first volume of Caro's LBJ biography. Oh my god, this book. THIS BOOK. The next time I do this I'm going to update every week on what I learned that week because there is just so much in this tome. I want to visit the Pedernales, but not in summer. The description of grass-growing was riveting. The descriptions of the lives of the farmwives before electrification was riveting (and horrific). The play-by-play for elections in the forties literally kept me up past my bedtime. And I have not even touched on Pappy O'Daniel (a real person!! who was apparently toned down CONSIDERABLY for O Brother Where Art Thou) or Lady Bird or how Caro more than once makes sure to mention that Johnson had a dumptruck ass.

Anyway, Lyndon was a vote-buying absolute fucking weirdo from birth and his mother was just as weird and his father was fascinating and I'm a little in love with Sam Rayburn. Do not let either the Old White Man History or the fact that this book is a fucking doorstop stop you, this is a masterpiece and I see why it won a Pulitzer. (whoops, looks like it was another volume that won the Pulitzer) I cannot wait to read the other volumes, which I estimate will take me about a year per book, but worth it!

[slashmagpie]

okay . okay. hello, hope you're going well! please excuse me doing this instead of commenting on lost boys, but i wasn't logged in on my phone and i am.. very lazy sJKCBGFDJKS

. i didn't realise you could add a 'keep reading' to asks? but uh. man i hope this brings you some joy, at least skjgbcfds

okay . oookay . okay head in my fUCKING hadns

i just went and reread the entire series, because i . CANNOT get this off of my mind. and i have SO MANY MORE QUESTIONS . AUGHGKFDJ

who is the queen? what happened to her? why was the moon an egg? what was the moon? what the fuck is etho? WHERE DO THE ALIENS COMEF ROM .NHNGJKFDS this featured in my DREAM last night, okay . you're sending me INSANE

i'm genuinely so so obsessed with the way you do buildup. i mean.. man, i've read the whole thing, but on reread i kept having to put my phone down and make (quite frankly inhuman) noises because the way you structure this entire series is so, so insanely talented and well-done and . aUGHHHGDFKJGBS I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY EXCEPT THAT I'M GOING INSANE ,. yeah. y eah.

. you're honestly an artist dude, this is so so well-developed, the worldbuilding is an insanely unique idea (the QUINTESSENCE ??? DUDE . even if etho has become its god, just the very concept of a world without sapience?? one that doesn't have purpose, doesn't have /meaning/, and yet was so hungry for a creator that it dragged etho into it?)

(NOT TO MENTION THE CHOKEHOLD THAT YOUR MAGIC SYSTEM HAS ON ME. tunguskite being the origin of magic (or not really magic at all), and then incorporating it into the blood of 'mages' to allow them to perform '''impossible''' tasks… man . m a n) (i'd also like to mention the etho/other etho dichotomy, and then the realization that it was always him after all? . gOD)

i can't stop thinking about how etho described demons as 'beings that can do magic without blood,' followed by pearl describing the reds as demons?. like ,, okay it might be coincidence. it might be accidental phrasing, or just a throwaway line, but i. i DON'T KNOW ANYMORE . GHH

. aughgHGHHHH I AM NOT A PATIENT PERSON THIS FIC IS DOING THISNGS TO ME . <- dramatic, please excuse me sKCJGBFDS

..anyway uh! i'm so sorry it's like three in the morning and i can't make this any more legible but i, uh. i hope you don't mind. this entire serious is absolutely wonderful, and i'd just like to thank you for the honour of being able to share in such wonderful writing and worldbuilding :)

-@crimson-roots (since i can't send asks from my sideblog, whoops :"D) . uhh! yeah! sorry again for rambling in your askbox, and i hope you have a good night!

🥰🥹😊❤️❤️

...No wait that's not Enough. Hang on.

There we go, that's a pretty good representation of my emotions rn.

So it turns out you can't actually put a readmore in an ask, but I'm gonna put one before my answer because otherwise oh boy this post is gonna get long.

So many questions!! A lot of them will get answered in the text ("what happened to the queen?" well I'm glad you asked—) but as for the ones that probably won't (or, if they do come up, won't be super plot-relevant or that important so I can answer):

The Egg is basically where the aliens are "born"; it's near a black hole, it's got some natural tunguskite reserves, and it's basically hollow save for the pulsing mass of the hivemind. It's also, y'know. A moon. It's orbiting some sort of planet somewhere. (Probably actually the planet the Hermethius was returning from, now that I think about it.)

"What the fuck is Etho?" I'll do you one better: why the fuck is Etho? (Okay, but actually: Etho was a mortal mage, and is now an immortal... something. He's not quite a god on the same level that Bdubs is, but he's more than just a regular [redacted] like [redacted] or [redacted].)

The demons thing: Etho is a person who attempts to explain magic with science, and Pearl is a person who attempts to explain science with magic. Generally, Etho's definition of "demon" (person who can do magic without blood) and most mages' definitions of "demon" (in this case, as a synonym for the Reds) don't overlap, except for when they do (for example, in the case of New Tenacity, [redacted], or [redacted]). Fun fact: False generally uses Pearl's definition of "demon" to refer to the aliens (or any other sort of person-who-isn't-a-person, like Hels) rather than Etho's, since her whole thing is being a "demon hunter." If she were using Etho's definition, that would technically make her a demon herself. (Essentially: "demon" is a catch-all word magical people use for "thing/being I don't understand." It has a lot of uses and now that I think about it that's probably kind of confusing, oops.)

And then to address some of the other comments:

I have genuinely had so much fun setting up all the dominoes in this story and I am just as excited to watch them fall as you all are. Honestly, the set-up I've done for LLAU is some of my favourite technical writing of mine ever, in the sense of narrative construction and structure. This was also a pretty good time for a reread, because in a few chapters we're going to get to a scene in which a LOT of this stuff's gonna pay off. (I don't know how many chapters because every time we get close I have to revise my mental outline and add another chapter for pacing purposes but we're So Close we're closer than we've ever been I've been excited about this plot point for FOREVER.)

Honestly, I think a lot of the coolness of the worldbuilding and story construction here comes from the original source material, i.e. the Lifeline games. The Lifeline series consists of like 8(?) games, all of differing genres and with mostly different casts, and over the course of the games more and more of its central worldbuilding is revealed and builds up into the metaplot, which is of course the aliens' attempt to take over the Earth. However, Lifeline got discontinued before it could conclude, and many of its mysteries will remain mysteries (even the one game that came out post-discontinuation, Beside You In Time, doesn't seem to answer any of the questions from what little I've played of it). Because of this, it meant I got to take the pieces I'd been given, throw out what I didn't like, add in new things that I did, and tie it all together to make sense. (There's definitely some Early Installment Weirdness in the series because of this, because I started writing this AU on a whim and it took me a While to nail down the specifics of the magic system, how the aliens work, etc.)

For an example of this: "magic is a lie" is a line that reoccurs throughout the games and is Never explained. It's vaguely implied that magic actually has something to do with tunguskite, so my solution to this is that the energy tunguskite emits is what mages call "magic." So mages have tunguskite in their blood. It's like microplastics! But probably significantly more cool.

And then there's the way it incorporates the Hermitcraft lore and characters—Bdubs' whole thing was my attempt to fuse together two different characters from the original games, because Bdubs Had to be both Captain Aya and Clepsydra, and how could I explain him both being in space and an ancient time monk at the same time? And The Bdubs Thing is one of my favourite parts of this AU because the way those two things came together is just so delightfully weird. Constructing this story and its world has honestly been such a blast, I don't think I've ever enjoyed the experience of writing a fic this much.

(When the story is done I might potentially write a post explaining how I took the Lifeline game lore and changed it to work for this fic, because right now some of that stuff is spoilers but I think it's a very fun topic and would love to do a deeper dive into it.)

Anyway, enough of me rambling, thank you so much for this ask!!! It honestly made my day lol. (Also this fic is very much a passion project and definitely the most self-indulgent thing I've ever written so I'm always delighted whenever I get the chance to ramble about it and my writing process.) I should probably go get working on the next chapter instead of procrastinating by answering this ask. (In my defence, Grian and Joe are causing me anguish. Send help.)

[voasprofile]

vil with an s/o who is a singer and love music from their orig world

I could probably shorten the title but eh I'm new cut me some slack

being brought to whole other world without knowing anything about it can really take a toll in our little readers hearts

luckily they have their phone with them, music really brings comfort to people. especially because it was the only thing familiar to them. what's in it? well yk only the most heart swelling, gut wrenching, eyes watering, hair pulling music you could ever think of

either that or the most back arching, eyes rolling, butterfly giving music

or yk like a psychopath like me, both. on shuffle

ok neways

vil had known of the prefect, not very hard to

they were the talk of the school, from being magicless, to defeating what like 4 overblots, or being in trouble like every other hour

they were rather infamous to put it nicely

what he didn't know them from is their music

like holy hell, how tf did they get so popular? when did this happen?

well tbh he didn't find out until he saw people discussing about a new underground artist

after that he forgot to search up their name whoops

until he saw a vid from twistedtok raving abt this artist

so he was like eh why not and searched them up

it was yuu(pun not intended) he was kinda surprised like weren't you just fighting jamil 4 weeks ago?

browsing to yours list of song was like browsing through a teenagers diary

angst, angst, oh a horny song, and another one, and another one, and oh wait this sounds like- nvm it's angst

and it was just yuu recreating their fav songs and publishing it cause their phone died and twst doesn't have the same charger things

not me promoting but think somewhat this playlist of mine

you had garnered a lot of attention, for someone who plagiarized /j

don't tell anyone, but vil would totally listen to your music

i mean come on

but he wont admit it, that little bitch

during vdc camp, he would wear them small ear phones and would guard his phone with his life, like no one needs to know abt this

except rook knows, he always knows

and epel, because he once barged in vil's room for smth idk he seems like the type to do that

you only found out because vil asked you to play the song they were supposed to be practicing on. which was supposed to be the most recent one

but when you clicked play it was your song. let me put something totes not embarrassing for the both of you, hmm let's see

i wanna be your slave by maneskin yuu

the song was the next song as the practice song just ended a few seconds prior

silence engulfs the room your voice singing the most vile things anyone from here has ever heard you say

you kinda just froze like what were you supposed to be feeling?

why does it have to be this song?

so you were internally freaking out still frozen as rook puts it on himself to save two prideful beings egos. and walks to you and slowly gets the phone from your grip before pausing the song

while vil was witnessing the end of his life his career with an open mouth

"so you like my songs eh?"

"shut up literally shut up"

wow what a non-toxic way for the beginning of a beautiful bloom of a relationship

there was a lot of songs that reminded you of vil yet you only realized at like 2 months into the relationship

so you began dedicating love songs to him and only him cause like duh he's your so

but like the songs that are erotic and sad like real sad are literally dedicated to no one

cause your a moody little bitch who when even the slightest bit sad release a whole ass song with the most heart breaking lyrics

when asked in an interview on who hurt you, yuu were like

"haha myself"

or like abt those sussy songs

"i was feeling down so i had to cheer myself up"

or those songs dedicated to vil

"i am madly in love"

you two were almost the epitome of a picture perfect couple

almost(i thought abt making an angsty ending but i decided against it)

that bitch rook always steals your thunder

you were performing a new love song to vil and asking his thoughts about posting it

and rook comes up and recites a poem right. in. front. of. you.

you almost grabbed him by the neck and not let go for 30 minutes. by accident of course

so it was like a competition to the both of you

and the vibes were like yuu being like

"homewrecker"

and rook being like

"lmao what you talking abt neways. your skin as fair as snow and as smooth as porcelain-"

cue you throwing a vase at him

overall 10/10 would be a cute relationship

[carlyraejepsans]

Forgive me if this is something you've talked about before but, why do you think Papyrus wasn't in chapter 2 of Deltarune? I still find his exclusion so odd, after Sans forces the hang out on us in chapter 1 and so many people were looking forward to finally seeing him.

I remember seeing posts back when chapter 1 came out speculating that perhaps Sans's brother in DR might not be Papyrus (since Sans didn't and still hasn't referenced him by name) and now I'm kind of concerned of the possibility. Toby wouldn't do that right?? He must know how beloved Papyrus is...

and there it is, the million dollar question.

to make a very very long answer short(er), yeah. I DO think papyrus will be in deltarune. I sincerely hope he shows up, because he's one of our most beloved characters, but my wanting to see him isn't what drives my reason (... alright maybe it does. just a little)

if toby didn't want him in the game, he would've given him a one off "hey everyone it's me papyrus deltarune!" scene per chapter and that's it. he wouldn't have made an explicit effort to dangle him in front of your noses and go "whaaaat meeting papyrus are you crazy? that's gonna have to wait. oh you waited? whoops still not here sorry. nothing to worry about ;))". i think, with things as they stand now, it's much more likely it's SANS between the two of them who will be left behind by the story.

it's building up anticipation for something, we just don't know what yet.

you mentioned being worried that sans' brother will be an entirely different person. i think it's possible! it worries me a little. after all, the river person warned us of "the man who came from the other world". not men. man. it could be explained by the fact that papyrus is never a threat to our life, but still, it's peculiar.

in the end, even if it's not papyrus, there are two outcomes: we will ALSO meet papyrus in-game anyway, though in some other contest, or this new person will "become" him if we go full "papyrus is gaster" theory (even though i think it's pretty unlikely). in one way or another, papyrus exists in undertale. he's sans' brother there and he "showed up one day and asserted himself" alongside him. at some point or another, their paths are going to converge, whatever paths they might be.

what i think will happen, and what would explain sans' weirdly overprotective behavior that otherwise borders on ooc, is that papyrus IS there, he IS sans' brother, he hasn't been mentioned by name the same way mtt hasn't but we all still know it's him, and that he's likely just... young! I'm hoping he's the same age as the gang, but it's possible he could be even younger. it wouldn't be normal if sans went "hey, random 15 year old kid i just met, do you want to hang out with my 20 year old adult brother who has no friends in town yet". he calls him "little brother" a handful of times too, though that could be explained as toby clarifying their ages in english as well, since unlike japanese there aren't any single words that mean "senior brother". and if he's the same age as the gang, it's even MORE likely he'll take part in an adventure alongside them! he is among the someones "very very wonderful" you're about to meet mentioned in the goner maker sequence, after all ;)

hope this eased your anxieties a bit! I'm a bit worried too, all things considered, but i trust toby with his own story and characters (especially one he very clearly loves writing for)

[fics-n-stuff]

Affluenza | Pt2

Pairing: JJ × Kook!Reader

Summary: Y/N celebrates her birthday with a party that she didn't want to throw and finds out a sad truth about the boy that's not quite her boyfriend, but being in each other's company makes things at least a little better.

Warnings: Mentions of abuse and descriptions of injury, reference to drugs

Word Count: 3.5k

A/N: I'm so happy that so many people liked pt1!! It means the absolute world to me that people are reading and enjoying my work 🥰 Pt3 might take a little longer to get out, but I'll try to post it asap.

Taglist: @alotbnouf @fairypitou @305weasley @thecraziestcrayon @sofamochi @arvinrussellseggplant

Thanks for reading guys ❤

Pt1 here | Pt3 here

“Why didn’t you tell me it’s your birthday on Saturday!?” JJ exclaimed, letting go of your hand and sitting up from where you had both been lying on the deck of your boat.

“I didn’t think it was that big a deal.” You replied with a laugh. “I kinda just forgot to mention it.”

“But what if I wanted to buy you a present?”

“I don’t need a present from you JJ.” You smiled, reaching up to cup his cheek and pulling him down for a kiss.

The two of you had been dating for a couple of months now, and although you very much considered yourselves to be together neither of you had said the words ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend’ yet. The time you spent together was private, you kept it a secret from everyone; you didn’t want your family to know and he was hesitant to tell his friends, exactly why you weren’t sure but you didn’t want to pry. It wasn’t as if you were sneaking around, you were just being careful.

“I have plenty things already, your company is enough.” You said, pulling away from the kiss and sitting up yourself. “But unfortunately I won’t be able to see you on my actual birthday. Mom’s making me throw a party and every teenager on Figure Eight will be there, so I doubt you’d want to come.”

“I wouldn’t be welcome even if I did want to.” JJ chuckled. You hummed in agreement.

“That’s why I wanted to celebrate today.” You chirped, getting up to retrieve a cooler that you had brought with you.

“What’s in there?”

“A special birthday picnic.”

“Oh, I see.” He grinned as you took your seat opposite him again. “And what does that consist of?”

“Well, let’s have a look.” You opened up the cooler and looked in at what you had packed with a smile. “Of course the standard picnic items; sandwiches, fruit, some baked sweets.” You listed as you took them out of the cooler. “And then, as I learned from my mother, a young lady cannot celebrate her birthday without a bottle of champagne.”

“Fancy.” JJ nodded, taking the bottle from you.

“Not as fancy as these.” You said, taking the glasses out. “Crystal champagne flutes. I snuck them out of the cabinet. We only use them for the most special of occasions and my mom loves them so we have to be careful.”

“I can be careful.” JJ poured the champagne, and you clinked your glasses with a smile. “Happy early birthday.”

“This is a much better celebration than my party will be.” You sighed, finishing your sip and setting your glass down. “I don’t understand why my mom insists that I have to have one, I’m not actually friends with anyone that’s coming.”

“But I thought you said every kid on Figure Eight was going? You’re not friends with anybody?”

“No, not really. They’re all just so fake, I can’t stand it. I genuinely don’t think that any of them are really friends with each other and they’re just constantly pretending, but I can’t be bothered to pretend.” You rolled your eyes and JJ laughed.

“Sounds exhausting.” He smiled.

“What are your friends like, J?” You asked, genuinely just curious. He told you a bit about them, stories of the crazy stuff they had done, but you never got in depth about it. You felt like it was probably because he wasn’t ready to integrate the two parts of his life.

“They’re good.” He nodded. “I mean, we’re basically family. They’re just not the biggest fans of Kooks.”

“Well, neither are you.” You giggled.

“You know what I mean. I think you’d like them, I’m just worried that they wouldn’t want to give you chance.”

“How much do you bet I could win them over just like I did you?”

“I wouldn’t love it if you won them over exactly the same way as me.” He smirked, gently taking hold of your chin and pulling you in for a kiss, which you both laughed into. “I'm gonna get you a birthday present. What if I come by on Saturday just for a minute to deliver it?”

“You know I’ll be happy to see you, but nobody else at the party will.”

“Eh, who cares.” He shrugged, and you grinned broadly.

“Okay, if you insist.” You conceded. “Now let’s eat this picnic that I so painstakingly curated.”

+ + +

Your birthday party was in full swing, the ground floor of your house teeming with teenagers. People were drinking, dancing and jumping in the pool and you weren’t enjoying any of it.

Your mother had gifted you a particularly ugly necklace that was basically just a tangle of gold chain, and Nicholas had openly bad mouthed your father for only getting you a few books, even though that’s what you had asked for. The detest that you felt for him was justified. Your dad was actually supposed to have arrived back on the island the day before, but it wasn’t unusual for him to get held up with work.

You pushed past a group of boys having some loud conversation on your way into the kitchen and poured yourself a strong drink. You threw the drink back in one gulp and slammed the plastic cup back down onto the countertop with a loud sigh.

“What’s wrong, birthday girl?” Topper asked over the music, his arm slung around Sarah’s shoulders as they came up beside you.

“I’m fine.” You shrugged.

“Did your dad get you a good present this year?” Sarah asked with a smile. “A new car maybe?”

“I already have a car.” You replied with a flat chuckle. “He got me some books that I asked for.”

“That’s kinda boring.” Topper commented. You rolled your eyes and Sarah smacked him in the side.

“I think that’s sweet. What kind if books?”

You told Sarah about the books you had gotten, actually kind if enjoying the conversation. Sarah was actually pretty easy to talk to, you felt like the fact that you weren’t putting on an act made her kind of drop hers, and it was a refreshing break from the way that the rest of the teens on Figure Eight were constantly pretending to be the perfect versions of themselves.

Your explanation of the premise of one of your books was interrupted when you felt your phone ringing in your pocket. You took it out and saw that it was your dad, and you smiled.

“I gotta take this.” You excused quickly before rushing outside to get away from the music. You answered the call excitedly, greeting your dad with a bright tone.

“Hey, Pumpkin, happy birthday!” He exclaimed. “I’m sorry I didn’t call this morning, I got caught up in meetings. You know how it is.”

“I know, dad. It’s okay, you’re calling now. Are you done with work? Do you think you’ll get here tonight?” You questioned eagerly. You heard him let out a sigh, and your smile fell.

“About that, sweetheart, I’ve had a few bumps in the road.” He began. You felt your heart sink and you were already scolding yourself for getting your hopes up before he could even tell you what the reason for missing your birthday was. “My meetings haven’t gone as well as I’d hoped and it looks like I’m going to be held up for a few more days.”

“Oh, right, okay.” You nodded, keeping your voice steady even as your eyes welled with tears. “Hope things get better then.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N, I really did want to be there. I promise I’ll make it up to you when I get back; we can have a movie marathon night, completely your pick.” You let out a chuckle despite yourself. He might not be around much but he still knew you well, and movie marathon nights were one of your favourite things to do with him.

“Sounds great, dad. I can’t wait.”

“I hope you’ve had a good day, at least. What have you been getting up to?”

“I’m having a party, actually.” You replied. You didn’t need to tell him that you didn’t want to have the party and weren’t actually really enjoying it.

“Right now? I’ll let you get back to it then.” Your dad smiled down the phone. “Have fun.”

“Thanks, dad.”

“Love you, Pumpkin.”

“Love you too.”

You said your goodbyes and ended the call, and you tucked your phone back into the pocket of your shorts. You just stood there for a few moments, the loud music and whooping of partying teenagers emanating from the house, before tears began to fall. You shook with a silent sob and had to take a seat on the concrete of your driveway.

You sat there, with your legs pulled up to your chest and your head in your knees, for a few minutes. You sniffed, wiping your tears away on the back of your hand, when you heard a shuffle of footsteps and looked up quickly.

“JJ.” You acknowledged quickly, furiously wiping at your eyes as he walked up the driveway.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” He asked, his voice edged with concern. You were ready to brush away his concerns, but as he got closer you saw the bruising on his face and suddenly you had some worries of your own.

“What happened to you?”

“I asked first.” JJ countered. You watched him as he came to sit down next to you, lifting your hand and softly placing it just below his purpled cheekbone, inspecting the fresh bruising around his eye and the split in his lip, then noticing the discolouration around his collarbone. He took the hand away gently, intertwining your fingers, and you saw that there was no bruising on his knuckles; these weren’t injuries earned in a fair fight. “Why are you crying?” He repeated.

“No, that doesn’t matter.” You shook your head. You weren’t trying to downplay your upset anymore, you just knew that whatever had happened to JJ was more important. “Who did this to you, JJ?”

“I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.” He smiled, but there was no joy or amusement behind it. You hesitated for a moment before conceding.

“My dad missed my birthday again.” You told him. “The last time he actually made it home for my actual birthday was when I turned eleven, and yet somehow I still get my hopes up every year. I hate this party, there are at least three different types of club drugs being taken in my house right now, I’m sad. You’re turn.”

JJ sighed. He looked down at your joined hands, pausing to think for a moment before looking back up at you. He let out a short breath of soft laughter, lifting his free hand and smoothing his thumb over the crease that had formed on your brow.

“Promise not to freak out?” He asked.

“Okay.” You replied shakily. You could try to limit your reaction at least. “But you have to tell me the truth, J.”

“My dad hits me.” JJ said quickly, and you felt your lips part in shock. “I stay with John B most of the time, I try to stay out of his way when I’m home, but it’s not like I can avoid him completely.”

“Wha- Why don’t you tell somebody?” You stuttered. “Call the police or protective services or-?”

“I don’t want to.” He interrupted. “I’m happy here with my friends and if I get protective services involved then they’ll ship me off to the mainland. I can deal with my dad.”

“This doesn’t look like dealing.” You muttered softly, pushing the collar of his t-shirt to the side to get a better look at the bruise that it was partially covering. “When is this from?”

“Yesterday. I went home to get some money so I could buy you this.” JJ shifted to reach into his pocket and pulled out a small, flat box. “It’s not much but it’s all I could afford.”

You took the box from him curiously, unlinking your hand from his so that you could pull off the lid. Inside was a small silver necklace, a thin chain with a small circular pendant. When you lifted it up you saw that the pendant had a map of the world etched into it. The necklace was simple and sweet, and you felt a big smile take over your face.

“You didn’t have to get me this, J.” You simpered.

“I told you I wanted to.” He smiled back. You handed the box back to him and turned to face away, and JJ eagerly fastened the chain around your neck. He struggled a little with the tiny clasp, making you giggle. His hands ran over your shoulders before he dropped them, and you turned back to him with the smile gone from your face.

“You went through that just so you could buy this for me?” You murmured. JJ's smile faltered but didn’t fall, and he nodded slightly.

“It’s not your fault, Y/N. It’s just what happens.”

You sat silently for a little while, but your peaceful moment was interrupted by a loud round of cheering from inside. You looked over your shoulder towards the house with a groan, but then lightened up when you got an idea.

“You wanna get away from this bullshit?” You asked, gesturing towards the party.

“You wanna leave your own birthday party?” He asked with a chuckle. You shrugged.

“Nobody will notice that I’m gone. I’ll just have to come back at, like, midnight to kick everybody out.”

“Okay, then let’s go.” JJ smiled.

“Alright. Give me one minute.” You giggled, getting up quickly. “Just wait here a sec.”

You ran back into the house and pushed past all of the people to the stairs, heading up to your bedroom. You had kept the door locked to keep out horny couples. You rooted through one of your drawers until you found a set of keys, switched out of your party sandals to a pair of converse, and grabbed your car key off of your vanity before heading back out, making sure to lock your door behind you again.

You paused on the stairs to scan the crowd until you spotted Sarah, and pushed past the bodies towards her.

“Y/N! Where’d you go?” She shouted over the music.

“Just outside. I’m gonna disappear from the party for the bit, can you call me if something major happens?” You asked. Sarah frowned.

“But this is your birthday party.”

“I know it’s weird, but I’ve got some other stuff going on right now and I just need to get away for a bit.”

“Okay, I guess that makes sense. I’ll call you if anything happens.” She nodded, though the confusion was still clear on her face.

“Thanks. I’ll see you later.” You smiled, before heading back out.

JJ was stood at the side of the driveway waiting for you when you came back out, slamming the front door shut after yourself. You grabbed his hand and pulled him after you to your car with a smile.

“Where are we going?” He questioned as you started the engine and began backing out.

“My other house.” You answered.

“Sorry, did you say ‘other house’?”

“My dad’s house. He hasn’t been home in eight months and I haven’t been there in about five, but a cleaner comes by every two weeks to maintain it.” You explained.

“Jesus you’re rich.” JJ mumbled. He had a teasing smile on his face but the comment made you feel a little guilty.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to show off or anything. We don’t have to go to my dad’s if you don't want-"

“Y/N, it’s fine.” He laughed. “You didn’t choose to be born into a rich family the same way I didn’t choose to be born into a poor one.”

“I know, I just don’t want to be... insensitive isn’t the right word. I just don’t want to seem like I take it for granted; I don’t want you think that I’m that kind of person.”

“I don’t.” He assured you. “You don’t treat me like I’m any different for being poor, so I don’t care that you’re rich.”

It wasn’t long until you were pulling into the driveway of your dad’s house. It was grand and expensive looking, but it was still smaller than your mom’s; she had kept the house after the divorce and since your dad wasn’t even home most of the time he’d decided that he didn’t need quote so much space.

The inside was modestly decorated, no elaborate sculptures or outlandish wall decorations like so many of the other houses on Figure Eight. The furniture was very nice, and the few paintings and things that were on the walls were expensive, but your father was a man of simple taste. He didn’t even have any fancy chandeliers.

“I expected something more opulent for the richest man in the Outer Banks.” JJ commented as he looked around.

“Since when was opulent a word in your vocabulary?” You questioned with a giggle. JJ gasped, and pinched you in the side with a frown.

“I’m not completely dumb.” He objected.

You laughed, grabbing his hand and dragging him after you into the living room. You flicked on the light before dropping yourself onto the sofa and pulling JJ down with you.

“What kind of movies do you like?” You asked him as you picked up the remote and switched on the TV.

“Uh, I don’t know, action and horror.” He shrugged.

“What kind of horror? Slasher? Psychological? Paranormal?”

“I don’t know.” He chuckled. You gave an exaggerated sigh, going into the horror section on Netflix.

“Fine, I guess I’ll pick.”

You ended up putting on The Blair Witch Project after discovering that JJ had never seen it, and the two of you settled down. You were thankful to be away from the crowded mess of your birthday party and just have a quiet night with JJ.

“But I don’t understand how they managed to make it scary, basically nothing happened.” JJ perplexed after the movie ended.

“Yeah, that’s why it’s genius.” You grinned up at him. Throughout the course of the film you had ended up lying across the sofa with your head resting on his lap. “All of the horror is in the fact that you know that something this out there but you never see it. Modern horror movies could never.”

“That’s crazy bro.” He said, making you laugh. He looked down at you with an amused smile and a sparkle in his eye that made your heart jump.

“Do you wanna stay here for the night?” You offered once your laughter subsided. “I’m sure my dad has some stuff in his closet that you can sleep in.”

“Are you sure? I mean, don’t you have to go home?”

“Nah, my mom and Nicholas are staying at a hotel tonight so that I can have my party so they won’t know that I’m not there.” You shrugged. “You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to.”

“No, I’d like to stay.” He smiled. You let out a relieved breath that you didn’t realise you’d been holding.

“Cool. I need to go and kick everyone out of my house but we can watch another movie when I get back if you want?”

“Sounds good to me. Do you want me to come with you?”

“Probably best if you don’t, you know, with the whole ‘every Kook on the island is there’ thing.” JJ laughed lightly at that.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” He nodded. “Can I have a shower while you’re gone.”

“Sure.” You chuckled as you sat up. “You can use my en suite and I’ll get you something to change into.”

You took him upstairs, grabbing a t-shirt and a pair of gym shorts from one of your dad’s drawers before showing him into your room. It was plainly decorated like the rest of the house, but you had posters and photos tacked up and covering almost every inch of the walls.

“This is nice.” JJ smiled, looking around.

“Don’t go snooping around while I’m gone, a person’s bedroom is their kingdom.”

“I’ll mind my own business.” He agreed with a salute that made you grin.

“And make sure you dry off properly, I don’t want you dripping all over my nice carpet.”

“Jeeze, any more rules?”

“Uh, nope. I think that’s it.” You chirped. “I should be back in, like, half an hour. I’m pretty sure I left some chicken nuggets in the freezer last time I was here, you can have those if you get hungry. Or maybe I’ll get takeout on my way back?”

“Takeout sounds good.” JJ nodded, beaming, and pulled you in for a kiss before you left.

[theabominableblogger]

"The Legend of Vox Machina" S1E1-3 Reaction

THAT'S RIGHT- IMMA DO THIS

I do wanna get a few things out of the way though: as a "new" Critter, I am actually not that familiar yet with the first campaign. I do know a lot of the major beats for things through the Briarwood Arc (which this first season is covering) and beyond, but episodes 1-24ish I don't know of so please don't spoil that for me in the replies.

For this reaction series, I will be using the hashtag #purvan's reaction post stolen for the ages so if any of you guys want to find more reactions to this specific series, you can click on the tag in my blog.

On with the show!

AN:  I managed to record my reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

"The Terror of Tal'Dorei" Part 1

Found out LAST NIGHT [when I recorded this] that Amazon made a big whoops and released the episodes EARLIER than the allotted time slot. I don't if it was a legitimate mistake on their end or an intentional move. Who knows.

Literally wasted time last night watching Matt rage playing Monopoly with Game Grumps and Sam's Battle Royale. Ez cool.

*smiles when Matt begins to narrate about Tal'Dorei*

Is the wizard Liam?

*jaw immediately drops when the group gets instantly killed*

This animation is really good, holy snot!

The Murder-hobos!

"Do not rest until you bring me the greatest band of mercenaries in all of Tal'Dorei!" Ehhh, varying opinion on that...

They even sound drunk, I'll give them credit!

"Are you offering to help?" *shuts down*

The tabaxi meowed!

Wait, we're starting it off like this?!? Oh wow.

*cracks up at Percy not even trying to dodge*

Did he [Vax] just rob them [the other customers]?

*loudly grimaces when Keyleth vomits in the dog-person's mouth, making them vomit*

"Why does this happen every time we go drinking?!?" Wonder why...

TRINKET!

*gasps when Percy's gun misfires*

*full jaw drop when we cut to Scanlan and the naked woman in bed*

"What is that gnome doing with my daughter?" "It's probably best you don't know." *incomprehensible shocked laughter*

"Does that mean... we've been kicked out of every tavern in Emon?" First world problems?

How did they get their name?

"Pike, ethics are a luxury we can't afford." Oh give her some credit!

"Vex and Vax only care about themselves." "Well [expletive] you." *laughs*

Oh my God, they didn't really have to show that [Scanlan peeing]

"What's the matter with you?!?" That's Matt!

Mercenaries... line line line line line REWARD!

*groans and covers screen when Scanlan's pants drop* I'm didn't see that

That is a giant bear

*Grog loudly belches* Euggh, I don't like that

"It's a rather clever play on words-" "Honestly we don't care." *wheezes*

"Allow me to give you a proper introduction." Oh no we're getting a song?

"He's Vax." "She's Vex." *laughs*

*laughs awkwardly as Scanlan starts rapping and mutes it*

AN: I did go back and listen to the entire song. It rocks. I also have the twin part stuck in my head for the past two days.

Why did I get like... vibes of Galavant and "The Morning Report" from The Lion King in that song?

Yes, get the bear, get the bear! I see you, Khary Payton!

"He got his hand cut off in a bar room brawl." "Oh shit." *laughs*

*Vex senses something mentally in the room* What was that? What was thaaat?

The backgrounds look really pretty

Isn't the Shale Steps like three miles away from Emon though? Is it just a power move to use the skyship?

*laughs* She's [Keyleth] just started talking to the tree!

Matt is literally playing every NPC in this show

"Are you a wizard?" Next campaign

*Keyleth and Vax share a look* Oooh... oohh...

These backgrounds are so pretty!

*gaps when the dragon stomps on the lamb in front of them*

*pretty much in shock for the entirety of the dragon fight*

This is awesome!

*Keyleth starts to summon lightning* Oh let's go, let's go girl!

That is a really intimidating design, oh my gosh.

No, the episode can't be over already!

"Grog, you're hurt." "Nah, it's just a flesh wound." *wheezes*

"This is why I hate traveling with holy people." *wheezes again*

Oh, so her ranger ability is a Spider-Sense? That's awesome.

This music is awesome

*Grog picks up Pike and puts her on his shoulders* Aaww

They're not gonna end the episode there. Nuh uh.

*still fangirling about the animation*

*gasps when they find the town in ruins*

*gasps when Vax finds the family they spoke to earlier dead*

"That was... actually well stated, Grog." "What was?" "Nevermind." *laughs*

*gasps* The silver piece!

"The Terror of Tal'Dorei" Part 2

[Nudity, violence, foul language] No way!

I like the different designs for the background tieflings

*jaw drops when the Captain is DISINTEGRATED VIOLENTLY IN FRAME* They didn't need to show that!

That was just the intro?!?

Oh this opening's gorgeous

Let's go!

They're setting up for the Conclave at the end of the season, aren't they? $500 says so.

"Doom? We don't know the meaning of the word!" *chuckles*

Look at them [the guards] loving Trinket!

*laughs when Vax flicks Pike's ear on their way down the stairs*

*smiles when Gilmore enters the scene*

Was that Sprinkle?

"Why if it isn't the mysterious Vax'ildan?" Did they just do the "love interest" panning shot on Vax?

*leans back in my seat as Vax and Gilmore flirt and then CONTINUE* I feel like a fourth wheel!

*wheezes and face plants at Tusk Love*

*laughs at Gilmore's disappointed gasp at the silver pieces*

There's a triceratops skull on the shelf

He [Gilmore] just slaps the page. That's awesome

"If we survive this, I owe you dinner." "You owe me more than that, my handsome half-elf." *leans back in seat again* Yeah like chocolate, about 500 gold.... that ass...

"All right you two, foreplay's over." *laughs*

Is that the same Matt NPC? That poor guy.

*cackles as Grog rolls behind the ale cart* Nat 20 Stealth!

"Dreadful taste in art." Wait they said dragons are egomaniacs and Krieg has a portrait of himself in the staircase. It's literally him. He's the dragon.

*gasps when Sir Fince gets freaking impaled*

Oh, the rug! The rug!

"Look for some kind of fulcrum." "Wait, a [expletive] room." "I mean, that's what I heard." *laughs*

*laughs at Vex being salty at Vax complimenting Keyleth*

"Look, they're in the booty!" *laughs* They're so immature!

"Seems excessive for a council member." "Seems excessive for anyone." Percy, you literally have like a Scrooge McDuck vault! Don't talk to me!

*leans back in shock at the GIANT GREEN EYE looking back at Keyleth* What was that?!?

He [Krieg] is the dragon!

*jaw drops at Krieg transforming into his dragon form* THAT WAS SO BALLER!

"Vax, did Gilmore give you any insight on how to kill this thing or did you two flirt the entire time?!?" "Shit! Right, right, uh..." *laughs*

*Brimscythe wipes out the group* It's an illusion!

*jaw drops at the ominous chanting in the soundtrack*

*giggles at Percy Naruto running*

*Vax running around the falling rocks* Oh, slow-mo! Let's go!

*pretty much silently loses her mind as Grog decides to rage*

*laughs* She's [Vex] stealing an armful of gold!

"We got 'em, kid." Aaww...

Who's on the Council of Tal'Dorei? Who's on the Council?

*chuckles at Keyleth ruining the moment between the twins*

*gasps* The Briarwoods!

OK, Sylas, whatchu got?

Whaaaaaat?

*episode ends* WHA-

"The Feast of Realms"

*gasps when we open with a flashback to the De Rolos*

What's with the dog?!?

You can't just open it like that! Are you kidding me?!? I don't even know if I wanna sit through the opening because I want to get to the opening!

*Establishing shot of Greyskull Keep* Oh that looks so pretty!

*laughs as Grog sneak attacks Vax with ball tag*

*Allura walks into the keep* Oof, this place is a bit of a fixer upper

"You have my word nothing will go wrong." Absolutely everything will go wrong

*Scanlan's codpiece* Why?

*wheezes at Grog and Vax's curtsises*

Matt!

"Ahem!" Scanlan, don't.

"What?!? You wanna get freaky with me?!?" Oh no

*gasps when the Briarwoods are announced*

Why are they giving him [Percy] the anime fish eye lens? I don't like that

*silently and openly ogling Vax in his formal wear good lord here's my money sir*

"The safe word is... chenga." *laughs*

*Percy realizes that they have to sit across the Briarwoods* Oh no

Ohhhh nooo

"Shit's about to get real!" Oh no

OH God... are they just pretending that they don't know each other?

"Percy, I [Grog] say you walk over to the Briarwoods, say hello to break the ice, and then punch them in the face." That works.

Oh God, I wanna see that dinner go down, are you kidding me?

OK, Vax, I see you with the little cow lick. I see you, man.

I wonder if Sylas has been feeding off Desmond.

*gasps when Vax uses his snake belt to distract the guards*

Why is she still wearing her gloves while she's eating? C'mon, Delilah, etiquette!

*gasps when Sylas charms Sovereign Uriel*

Oh mah God!

C'mon, Percy, say something.

"Have we... met before?" Oh no

*gasps when Percy breaks his glass out of anger*

Did they really just make a bead joke? Are you kidding me?

Vax, what are you doing? I do not like this.

"LIARS!" Percy!

Percy, Percy, Percy, Percy!

Oh no... Vax... Vax, get out of there! Vax!

*gasps when Vax finds mention of the Whispered One*

You gotta get outta there!

"Gosh, you're a handsome couple.." *wheezes with laughter*

*jaw drops when Sylas charms Vax*

"I'll distract them. You go." Scanlan, I do not trust anything- no

*jaw dropped for pretty much the remaining 7 minutes of the episode*

*laughs when Grog hurls NPC Matt out of the weapons closet*

C'mon, Vax!

"Would you look at that, dear?" LINE! PER! LINE!

I forgot about Craven Edge!

"Thanks, Pike!" Radiant weapon!

*Allura facepalms at Scanlan's song* Same!

*Percy goes after Desmond* Oh no, ohhhhh!

*pretty much in shock for the entire Orthax smoke sequence*

"You fool. Now your soul is forfeit." Oh my God, stop, stop!

NO! No, no no no... NO! YOU CANNOT END IT THERE! NO!

[fluffyglass]

WELCOME TO DILLYDALE! (UPDATED!)

The updated cast is finally here!

Y'know how I mentioned my sister and I were working on a project? Yeah, this is that.

Welcome to Dillydale! is a fanmade Reboot of The Mr. Men Show, thought up by two teenagers who have absolutely nothing better to do.

With a much more story-focused narrative aimed at slightly older kids, Welcome to Dillydale! features numerous small story arcs starring all your favorite little misses and mr. men!

Full Cast + Extra Info below the cut

Mr. Tickle - You know him, you love (or don't love) him, he's the absolute classic.

Mr. Greedy - Your friendly neighborhood chef, taste-tester and gourmet all in one!

Mr. Happy - Dillydale's favorite constantly-smiling TV host!

Mr. Sneeze - Achoo!

Mr. Bump - The accident-prone little dude himself.

Mr. Small and Mr. Nosey - that one gay couple who everyone knows and yet nobody seems to remember how they met

Mr. Messy - The filthiest resident of Dillydale.

Mr. Fussy - The least filthy resident of Dillydale.

* Mr. Clumsy - While not a resident of Dillydale, he occasionally pops by to visit his cousin, Mr. Fussy!

Mr. Nervous - Dillydale's paranoid jelly man. Don't startle him, or he'll melt into a puddle before your eyes!

Mr. Lazy - Possibly the second-most brilliant inventor in Dillydale - if only he had the motivation to act on his ideas.

Mr. Mean - Probably deserves Mr. Stubborn's catchphrase more than he does.

Mr. Bounce - Boing! Boing! Boing! Boing! Boing! B

Mr. Strong - If anyone in Dillydale had to be the most fitness-obsessed, it would have to be Mr. Strong. That's like - his thing, y'know?

Mr. Quiet - Can't hear you, next please!

Mr. Grumpy - Getting too old for this entire town's nonsense.

Mr. Skinny - Was incredibly easy to fit in this character list!

Mr. Cool - Whatever he is, he's too cool for you.

Mr. Rude - At this point, he's more tired of everyone's stupidity than actively rude. He's still rude though, don't get me wrong.

Mr. Scatterbrain - Can probably bend reality. If he could/can, he'd use it to make himself a sandwich.

Mr. Stubborn - May or may not be an alien. He's totally an alien.

Mr. Crosspatch - Violence incarnate.

Little Miss Bossy - Karen

Little Miss Naughty - A criminal

Little Miss Sunshine - Dillydale's favorite female constantly-smiling TV host! After all, they can't just pick between her and Mr. Happy!

Little Miss Tiny - Just you wait until she grows up! (She never will)

Little Miss Helpful - She is not helpful. But she sure does try to be.

Little Miss Magic - (⊃｡•́‿•̀｡)⊃━⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿

Little Miss Shy - Barely anyone knows her, because she barely leaves the house. Poor girl, honestly.

Little Miss Splendid - Can afford to live in a way fancier city, but stays in Dillydale because she knows she can flaunt her wealth better there.

Little Miss Late - Her description was late, it'll be here in a few hours. Or days.

Little Miss/Mr. Twins - Which is which? Why, if they swap their bows, nobody could tell!

Little Miss Chatterbox - Oh, Little Miss Chatterbox is such an interesting character! Y'know, while I was drawing her, I remember thinking to myself "oh, Miss Chatterbox has such an iconic design!" and thus she ended up being one of the characters who's design didn't change at all, oh, speaking of characters who didn't change, I also-

* Little Miss Stubborn - Lives on a farm out in the countryside. Still pissed that an alien stole her identity.

Little Miss Fun - Can't sit still for more than 3 seconds at a time.

Little Miss Somersault - Good at basketball, probably

Little Miss Scary - RAWR!!!

Little Miss Whoops - Probably the clumsiest resident of Dillydale, much to the dismay of her brother, Mr. Bump.

* Little Miss Calamity - Disappeared from Dillydale years ago. Her whereabouts are still unknown.

Little Miss Princess - Wait, wasn't Dillydale's monarchy overthrown?

Little Miss Hug - *Hugs you*

Little Miss Inventor - The actual most brilliant inventor in Dillydale.

* Little Miss Daredevil - She moved to the moon, but visits home often. Why did she move to the moon? She's Miss Daredevil, that's why!

Wow, what a lovely group of characters!

BUT WAIT, THERE'S EXCLUSIVES!

(Aka ocs we put in for funsies)

Little Miss Autistic - Dillydale's resident "if you ask me about this book series I will tell you every fact about it known to man" girl.

Little Miss Gleeful, Little Miss Rampant, and Mr. Witty - Miss Bossy's three little tyrants.

Mr. Fancy - Prettier than you.

Little Miss Perfect - Perfect, perfect, perfect.

Little Miss Purity - The purest diamond around. Or so she'd like you to believe.

I reached the image limit for a tumblr post, so the remainder of the characters shall be in a reblog! See you there!

[ice-cream-writes-stuff]

¤~°Ghost Marriage: Lovely Bride To Be?!°~¤

"Please.. Marry me!"

"Just pay attention to me. Let's get married!"

"Would you please.. Choose me as your groom."

"Beautiful you. I want to become your "love servant" forever and always."

"I am not a princess!!"

¤~Once upon a time...~¤

A young ghost flew around and about in the mortal world. No guards around to keep watch of him because they still lurked under the ground. It had been many years since he had actually explored the land he once walked on. Smiling sadly, he decided to check out the venue he would stay at before he would find his bride. Floating into the Night Raven college grounds. The undead prince found himself at the abandon mansion.

Yet... The area felt somewhat lively then how it was last time he visited. Analyzing his surroundings, the prince saw a tiny patch of soil besides the mansion. "Is someone planting flowers here?" He whispers quietly to himself. Curiously, the prince found himself going inside the building.

"Did they (Mr. Crowley) clean up the place before me and my family would arrive..?" The once broken furniture he once saw was nowhere to be found. Only three wood chairs, one couch and a little coffee table. The walls were not rotten with mold and stains. Now with fresh light brown wood. It was renovated.

Flying up to see the rest of the mansion. He was now in a room- "*snore*"!!! -That was occupied? The young prince was quiet as a mouse as he followed the loud snoring. Elias expected it to be some college student boy who fell asleep there because he was kicked out of his dorm.

Instead...

The Ghost Groom saw a lovely young woman laying on a rusty bed. With a odd cat creature sleeping next to her pillow. All curled up into a fluffy ball. But Elias was more focused on the female than the cat. 'She's... Beautiful..' The prince thought to himself as he watched the "princess" sleep.

The young "princess" had (h/l) (h/c) that messily spread out all over the place. Her soft looking (s/c) skin shone brightly from the moonlight. Her lips were cute and plump like a peach. With small button nose that twitched from time to time to let out tiny breaths. Everything about her was perfect! Though the young undead prince didn't realize that the woman was waking up as he admired her.

"Ugghh.." (Y/N) groans out a groggy yawn. Sitting up from her sleeping position. Unaware of her ghostly visitor that floated right in front of her. Rubbing her eyes with arm. She finally sees her unknown guest.

The male ghost froze as his and (Y/N)'s eyes lock together. "....Uh...hi?" (Y/N) greets, not sure how to react to this situation. Some ghost she didn't know was in her room and was just staring at her. Was this dream?? Is this ghost going to harm her!

As her mind raced with possibilities, (Y/N) glares at the ghost. Not knowing if he was friend or foe. The young ghost gulps when he sees her glare and tries to speak. "I-I, *ahem* excuse me. But I mean no harm!" The ghost explained, putting his hands out in surrender to prove he meant it.

Surprised by his actions (Y/N)'s narrowed eyes had closed, taking a deep breath of air. She sighs out through her nose with a slight hum. "... Alright. I believe you, I guess? You mind explaining who you are and why are you here." The female asks quietly, looking over her shoulder to see Grim sleeping with a slight purr.

Focusing her attention back on the ghost, she waits for him to explain.

'Oh no! I can't tell her. It's too soon, I need to win her favor before the season comes. But with a princess like her, I bet she has suitors left and right! I need to court her and win her hand!'

"...You see, I'm not from around here. I just wanted to explore this place. I've never been here before." The ghost fibbed a little. Deciding it was his best course of action than telling her the truth. "Huh.. Okay, but why here? There's other places around campus that are much cooler looking."

(Y/N) tells him as she gets out of the bed quickly and quietly. Gesturing for him to follow her. The young woman walks out of the bedroom with her new spooky acquaintance floating behind her. Carefully treking down the stairs, she goes to the kitchen. Looking around, she spots a brown bear mug and a black cat mug.

Smiling, she takes the mugs out of the cupboard. Happy that she got a good deal for those mugs at Mr. S shop.

Getting some water in the mugs, she holds out the cat mug for the ghost. Expecting that the ghost would decline. Instead he takes the mug and thanks her. (Y/N) nods and drinks out the bear mug while her guest takes a sip too.

(Y/N) puts down her mug and leans on the kitchen counter. "Look, ghost pal. If you want to see the campus, maybe you should go outside than be in here." (Y/N) tells the ghost with a sleepy yawn at the end. "I would but... I don't think that would be a good idea. What if one of the students of the college try to attack me!" The prince said with worry, not seeing (Y/N)'s pitting expression.

She knew most definitely that some of the students would attack the poor ghost in fear. (Y/N) did the same thing when she first met the ghosts of the Ramshackle dorm. But then she got to know them and they were really nice! So she came up with some comforting words for her spooky pal.

"Well.. If that happens, I'll protect you." (Y/N) said with a wide smile to hopefully bring comfort to him.

The prince froze at the woman and her sweet words. Elias knew at that moment she was the one for him. Everything about her was lovely to him. It settles it then, she will become his bride! Now all he needed was her name. "Pri- I mean! Miss, what might be your name?" Elias asked boldly as he waited for the female to answer.

"It's (Y/N). What about you, what's your name?"

"Prince Elias, princess (Y/N)." Elias states, placing a hand on his chest as he bows. "That's a nice name! Also you don't need to bow?" (Y/N) told Elias with a awkward smile. Though realized what he called her. "Princess..?" The (h/c)-nette told herself, starting to laugh quietly at Elias assumption. "I'm not a princess." (Y/N) giggles out, though Elias just smiled at her.

"Your right. You will become my bride and then become a princess."

"Huh?"

(Y/N) could feel her skin turn cold after what Elias said. "Your joking right?" (Y/N) blurted out with fear creeping into her soul. Elias just kept smiling as he placed his cup down on the counter and goes closer to (Y/N). Taking the bear mug from her paleling hands. The Ghost Groom placed it next to the other mug. Elias almost translucent hands holds (Y/N)'s gently.

"No. We will be married twomrrow, my dear princess!" Elias said sweetly like honey. (Y/N) could feel herself grow faint as she falls into the Ghost grooms hold. Then the last thing she could see was her mugs before sleep consumed her body.

(Whoop! This is from my book on another site and I wanted to post it on here. I will try to make a Masterlist and more stories in the future. Part 2 is out.)

[unkownknowledge]

Genshin characters and their spider s/o

A little crossover HC post between terraformars and genshin.

Basically the reader is the result of a messed up experiment and now they look like a monstrous humanoid spider, like this guy:

Except you have no human skin or hair, just pure chitin, extra legs out the back, and mandibles(like a turian)

Also: request are still open, feel free to request!

Including: Jean, Xinqiu, and Razor

_____________________________

Jean: hollow knight

_____________________________

Jean had been receiving reports of frightened merchants and townsfolk, all of whom had been found on the road ranting about a giant spider.

Jean was sure it was nothing more than hilichurls or hoarders or abyss mages and the people were merely suffering panic induced hallucinations, this was supported by the clear signs of such dangers at the scene of the crime.

But still, neither any of the knights nor adventurers in the guild reported saving these people, nor did Diluc claim that he did when she asked him.

So Jean decided to investigate, after all not only is there a chance of finding camps of the three above dangers, but also the chance of finding a new ally.

When she saw you in a clearing you looked like a normal human, until you turned your head in an inhuman manner and looked at her with eight red glowing eyes.

You screamed at her and used your geo vision to grow eight giant legs out your back, which you used to run away.

Jean, being the persistent woman she is, wasn't about let you go until she confirmed if you were a friend or foe.

She chased you through the forest for a while, and unfortunately didn't notice a group of hilichurls hiding behind some trees.

One swung out and struck her from behind, knocking her to the ground.

At the sound of this you turned around and saw Jean on the ground.

While she easily could have beaten the hilichurls, she didn't have to. This is because you were immediately next to her, sword drawn and slicing through the monsters like a hot knife through butter. Your geo legs acted like extra blades that parried any attack directed towards the knight.

Because you're other legs were busy, however, you were unable to block the attack from a crossbow that shot right through your knee.

You fell down and were beaten senseless by the hilichurls, the last thing you remember was the sounds of a blade and the monsters turning to dust before you blacked out.

You woke up on a soft bed inside an unfamiliar building. You tried to get up but your knee had a large hole in it, luckily for you your ability to feel pain was long lost.

Jean entered a minute later with some food, "good, your awake."

"Where am I?" You asked.

"In my home, the guest room to be exact."

"Why did you save me?"

"Because you were in danger."

"Yes but why? Aren't you afraid of me?"

"Considering how you saved me as well? No, not at all."

Jean poured some tea for both of you, "now onto-"

You felt your eyes water, something you didn't realize you could still do.

"What's wrong?" Jean asked.

"It's just, it's been so long since anyone was...nice to me. My appearance isn't exactly very welcoming."

"And yet you still help people, the same people who call you a monster?"

"Of course! I might be an abomination, but I'm not a monster. In fact, before I became...this I had always dreamed of joining the knights."

"Well, that makes things easy."

"What do you mean?"

"While I cannot officially make you a knight, I can make you an honorary member of the knights of favonius."

"REALLY!?" You said, a child like excitment on your face.

So you joined the knights, of course not everyone was happy about this.

But noone doubted the acting grand master's decision, after all she never once failed the city.

After a while the city warmed up to you, even hailing you as a hero thanks to all you've done!

But the city's attitude towards you wasn't the only thing getting warmer.

Infact, a certain person's cheeks seemed to grow red as Amber's ribbon at the mere mention of your name.

Lisa and Kaeya were the first to notice Jean's infatuation with you, and they were quite intent on helping her.

It would be easy for them to set it up: you were cold blooded, so you had a heater in your room during the winter, and thanks to a 'freak lightning strike', your house was under renovations for the whole season, this caused Jean to let you stay in her home until yours was repaired.

Now all they had to do was sneak in an 'cool it' down.

You awoke in the middle of the night due to the temperature suddenly dropping. You tried turning on your heater but that didn't work. You went downstairs to make some hot tea, unaware that Kaeya swapped the labels on Jean's coffee and your tea. After making the beverage you sat down in the warmest corner, covered in blankets, and with a warm drink in hand.

Fun fact! Spiders get hella drunk off caffeine.

You are a spider.

One sip of the coffee and you felt funny, you couldn't think straight and felt wobbly.

Kaeya and Lisa giggled watching you.

"So, how DID you get them drunk? You couldn't exactly have spiked their tea could you?" Lisa asked.

"I swapped the labels on their tea and Jeans coffee. Spiders get hella drunk on-" Kaeya noticed Lisa worried face, "fuck, what did I do this time?"

"Kaeya, spiders don't get drunk on caffeine like humans do with alcohol."

Lisa pointed Kaeya towards the window

"Whoops"

Caffeine doesn't make spiders drunk the same way alchohol does a person, which is what Kaeya expected.

Caffeine makes spiders hyper, very hyper.

When Jean heard skittering and clanging she thought someone was robbing the house, so she was reasonably surprised to see you lying in the center of the kitchen, crying, and with webs all over.

When she asked what happened you just rolled over and mumbled out gibberish about how you can't catch any flies.

Jean picked you up to take you to bed, but you wrapped your arms and legs around her and caused her to fall.

"(Y/n), please let me go." Jean pleaded.

You shushed her, "nap time" and fell asleep.

Your grip was to strong for her to get out, and with your weight she couldn't get up in this position, so she just had to wait for you to get up.

The next day Jean got up the same time as you, she would have said something if you didn't kiss her and pet her head.

"I love this dream." You said, nuzzling into the crook of her neck.

Jean was shocked, what dream? You were clearly awake.

"I wonder if Jean is this warm in real life....I wish I could find out..."

"(Y-y/n)" she stuttered out, "you're not dreaming."

You shot up with all your eyes wide as saucers.

You immediately thought of running. But where would you go? The forest? Yeah, that works, just go there a-

You felt a warm sensation on your cheek.

"So (y/n), how does this dream usually go?" Jean said with a suggestive wink.

.

.

.

"(Y/n)?"

404 error, reader.exe has crashed

After that rather unconventional confession session, you both started dating.

Jean was concerned about not having enough time for you, but that proved to be very unfounded. Thanks to your many years alone you didn't know what dating was, so to you simply working together was fine.

On every mission out of the city you would bring gifts or a picnic for when the sun was setting.

On days where you both had paper work you would make tea and buy little cakes or biscuits and sit on her lap as you rested on eachother's shoulders and fed each other snacks, under the excuse that "sharing a chair saves space".

On the rare occasion Jean gets to have a day off, she showers you in affection.

She'll make you breakfast in bed(it's not good 80% of the time, but you don't tell her), she'll cuddle with you all day, she'll even read to you if you want. She wants to give back to you for all the time she couldn't give you her full attention.

_____________________________

Xingqiu: it's like one of my Inazuman graphic novels

_____________________________

Your meeting with the guhua geek was far more coincidental.

You were just minding your business, catching some animals to eat, when some weird guy just walks by you, not noticing you at all, as he reads his book.

You were rather suprised and, by extension, curious about this boy.

Was he blind in peripheral? Was he that brave? Was he an idiot?

A bit of colum B, mostly colum C.

Xingqiu sat down on a rock and continued reading, given how he was reading aloud you figured you might as well take advantage of his lack of notice and learn to read.

But he did notice.

"Ah shoot, spaces out again." Xingqiu cried, "now I have to start all over."

Xingqiu started reading the book all over again, much to your joy.

You could easily match his words to the page thanks to your speed of comprehension.

When the boy noticed it was getting late he decided to head home, while you were upset you didn't try and stop him. In fact you immediately darted away before he saw you.

The next day he came back, and read from the same spot.

And again

And again

This went on for quite some time.

Xingqiu knew someone was watching him, but he never was able to catch a glimpse. He just figured it was someone who wanted to read legends of the shattered halberd but couldn't find any copies, and so the chivalrous thing to do would be to read it for them.

One day he finished the fifth book and proclaimed it was the last one, which made you rather sad.

Until he spoke to you.

"Well my secretive friend," he turned around, "shall w-"

You screamed

He screamed

For about five minutes.

After which you both just stared at eachother.

He pointed a shakey finger at you, "you're-"

You turned away, 'a freak I know' you thought.

"SO COOL!"

"What?"

Xingqiu immediately ran at you and started inspecting you.

The whole time he had such an amazed look on his face.

"Woah!" He said as he grabbed your mandibles, "are these real?!"

"Ye ey are, a ah ee e ah a" you said hoping he would understand that you need them to talk.

"Oh. Hehe. Sorry." He said releasing them.

"Aren't you...scared of me?" You asked.

"Why would I be? If you wanted to kill me you would have. It's not like I was particularly on guard when I was reading for you."

'Y-you knew I was there?"

"I knew someone was there, and I knew they were watching me read. Since you showed such interest in my book I thought the only chivalrous thing to do was to keep reading."

You were shocked, most people just ran and screamed upon seeing you.

"Now, shall we go look for the sixth book?"

After that you and Xingqiu became fast friends.

He used some of the money he made from the scam he pulled on that scammer to buy out the forest you lived in, making it officially private property so that people won't go after you.

He kept coming back with books for you both to read, you absolutely loved it!

And while you never realized it, you also loved him.

He however, did know he loved you.

Being the menace to society he is, Xingqiu decided the best way to confess was to just kiss you.

You're sitting on a stump with your head on Xingqiu's shoulder.

"This book isn't as good as the others." You say.

"Ah don't be like that, fairy tales are the foundation of all those 'knight in shining armor books' you love."

"Yeah but this is boring."

"True, true. But I think it has a great ending." Xingqiu turned to the final page, "and then the knight told the (royal title) how much he loved them, and to seal his love he placed a kiss on their cheek."

"That wasn't good."

"Why? It was very realistic."

"In what reality does someone confess by kiss-"

*smooch*

It took you a solid five seconds to process what happened.

Xingqiu smirked at you like the bastard man he is, "this one I believe."

Your mandibles hung slack as your face got a dark shade of blue.

"Uh, (y/n)?"

"Clothes off, now."

Xingqiu stumbled out the forest four hours later. Chongyun, who was protecting his privacy, asked him what's wrong.

"Absolutely nothing." He responded with the largest grin a human could muster, before his legs gave out, "can you carry me home?"

Your relationship was more steady than just that bit though.

Xingqiu spent as much time with you as he could, he even learned how to hunt so he could be with you while you hunted for food.

You never left your forest though, you were far to afraid of people and especially the vigilant yaksha(which Xingqiu tried to convince you was friendly).

Of course, not everything goes so simply.

Xingqiu was skipping through the forest, far to enamoured at the idea of you to notice someone following him.

You sat calmly on your rock and awaited your boyfriend of two years, today was his birthday so you made him a beautiful silk picture of his favorite scene from 'the legend of the broken halberd'

You felt the boy drop into your lap, "hello my love!"

You wrapped your arms and extra legs around him, "hello my little knight, I have a wonderful gift for-"

"XINQIU! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!"

You both turned around to see a man who looked oddly like Xingqiu.

"H-hey big bro..." Xingqiu said, clearly nervous.

"You're his brother?" You asked, "nice to meet you! I'm your future sibling in law!"

His brother looked surprised, then angry, "Xingqiu, a word."

"No," he responded, "anything you can say to me you can say to my (s/o)."

"Xingqiu, this is not a game."

"ANYTHING," Xingqiu said, far more aggressive, "you can say to me, you can say to them."

His brother sighed, "you can't date them."

"I believe I can."

"XINGQIU! ME AND FATHER HAVE TOLERATED ENOUGH OF YOUR CHILDISHNESS! YOU ARE AN HEIR OF THE FEIYUN COMMERCE GUILD, YOU CANNOT DATE THAT-THAT THING!"

Xingqiu shot up into a fighting stance, "care to repeat that?"

Xingqiu stared down his brother with murderous intent.

"So you wont back down?"

"Never, I love (y/n) to much!"

"If you don't leave them, you'll be disowned by father, all your wealth, power, and influence will be forfeited. All for an inhuman freak!"

"Xinqiu please," you tried telling your beloved, "I won't let you sacrifice-"

"Sorry darling, but I don't give a damn." He interrupted you before turning to his brother, "I will NOT abandon my beloved (y/n)! They are the most precious thing in the world to me! So go ahead! Strip me if my title, my riches, of my very skin! My heart will yearn for nothing else but the cold hard touch of love that is my (s/o)!"

Xinqiu's brother smirked

"So, you promise to always be with (y/n)?"

"Yes!"

"Through both sickness and health?"

As smart as he was, Xinqiu couldn't see what was happening, "with all my heart and soul!"

"And you would take (Y/N) as your contractually bound spouse?"

"I would sooner bite my arm off than live another day without them as such! In fact!" Xinqiu turned to you, "(Y/N)! WE'RE GOING TO GET MARRIED RIGHT NOW! COME ON!"

"Hold it!" His brother demanded, "(Y/N)! Would you stay with my brother, Xinqiu, through sickness and health, through rags and riches?"

You nodded, "forever and always!"

"And would you take him to be your contractually bound husband?"

"E-even if I had to fight Rex Lapis himself!"

Two burly hands grabbed the couple and pushed them together, "You may now kiss the bride!"

Without thought, you two kissed each other, not thinking to question the cheering, clapping, and crying-

You both pulled apart, "what the abyss is happening here?!"

The burly arms, now wrapping you both, was an older crying man who also looked like Xinqiu.

Xinqiu's Brother was crying and clapping.

Chongyun was blasting off party cones(🎉🎉these things)

And several other of Xinqiu's friends were there celebrating.

"W-wait..." Xinqiu started to remember that his brother, as a high ranking member of a commerce guild, can officiate marriages.

The older man, Xinqiu's father, cried and said, "finally! Grandchildren!"

(If you can't have babies, adoption exists and is perfectly normal)

Needless to say

404 error, Xinqiu.exe and Reader.exe have stopped working

_____________________________

Razor: the big bad spider and the itsy bitsy spider

_____________________________

(Please understand that my knowledge of Razor is based on his quest, I know of his special vision but it won't be brought up for this. I will be sure to read the wiki page for him if I write him again)

Razor knew something was wrong.

His wolf side told him something was wrong with the forest, and his human side told him it should be either avoided at all cost or destroyed.

Because it had stayed away he had largely tried to just avoid it and keep his lupical away from whatever IT is.

Until a foolish pup decided to try and defeat whatever big bad monster had their protector so scared.

Razor ran faster than any lightning bolt upon hearing the news.

Razor didn't know what he was seeing: giant webs strewn out covering entire trees, boars and Hilichurls wrapped in webs and frozen in a sickly green.

And at the center of it all was a giant, monstrous creature with eight leg like roots coming from it's back, feeding off the life of all the creatures stuck here.

This is what he was afraid of, the beast that every inch of his primal self screamed to get away from.

But he couldn't, not until he found the pup!-

"Hello." You said calmly to the strange man coming into your home, "is this your's?"

You outstretched your hand and a sleeping pup drifted towards razor on a flower.

"He caused lots of problems, so I made him sleep. Don't worry, it's nothing permanent, give him an hour or two and he'll be right up."

After Razor left, you assumed that would be the last disturbance for a while.

But it wasn't.

Razor's wolf half still feared you, was still mortified when he pictured your spider like face, your towering body, everything.

But his human half...teembled.

Not in fear, but in a different way.

He couldn't stop thinking of you, and his primal upbringing did little to quell the less romantic thoughts about your gem like eyes, the way your mandibles clicked and moved when you talked, the overwhelming nature energy that you radiated.

But he still knew good enough to get to know you better.

Just not HOW to do it.

"Why are you spider?"

Is not a good first thing to ask.

But you explained regardless: you were taken as a kid and experimented on by some rogue students from Sumeru academy.

Then some purple lady rescued you, and while you were grateful you much preferred living out in the wild.

"Yes...wild is good! Wolvendom, especially good!"

Someone please help him.

"Purple lady....ah! Shockey wizard lady from knights?"

You nodded

"Razor good friends with her and honorary knight! Do you know red flamy girl?"

"Klee? Oh yes! I love her! She's such a nice kid!"

"Yes, Klee is like lupical! Even if she...burns down forest from time to time."

Lucky for him, your shared familial love for the pyromaniacal minor helped bridge the gap between you two.

Eventually he even got you to leave your grotto(?) And meet his lupical!

He introduced you to the wonders of actually eating rather than just sucking the life force out of animals.

You both love and protect the forest of wolvendom, and if any large threat arises to it then you both will fight fang and claw to protect your home!

Neither of you know what love is in the human sense, but you both feel it to each other and act upon it: giving each other a portion of your food, taking blows in battle for each other, and cuddling more intimately than just friends would.

You are his lupical, and so much more.

_____________________________

I started this near last year's end, it took me till now to realize I should only do 3 characters.

(Paging: @golden-wingseos, @storytravelled)

[jisvnq]

[ 20:25PM ]

title | interruptions

genre | fluff, humor, best friends to lovers but it's what happens after the confession

warnings | none; probably just bad spontaneous writing shdh

word count | 1.5k

requested | by anonymous

description | where jisung knows the moments after his best friend confesses to him that she likes him back aren't supposed to be this awkward, and that just maybe, the third time's the charm ♡

z.txt | idk if i'm happy with this or not lol like it's just a 2am coffee-induced brainfart at it's best have fun reading more brainfarts (the text for the header kinda crapped up but alr sjdhs) watch me post this and dip JSJKSDJ

Jisung let out a deep breath, sneaking a glance at the side of your face as you nervously fiddled with the hem your shirt. He knew you felt the same way as he did, but why was he still so nervous?

"So, uh..." Jisung cleared his throat, breaking the thick silence that fell upon the room. He scooted just a bit closer to you, but you did the same, resulting in your knee bumping his lightly. "Wh- what now?"

Years of watching idiotically romantic movies and binge-watching impossibly unrealistic dramas with you left him with some sort of experience when it came to this love thing, and he just knew that the moments after confessing your love for each other were not supposed to be this awkward.

A thousand thoughts ran through his head. Maybe he did something wrong? Or maybe he said something wrong? What if now wasn't the right time for him to confess? But you had told him you liked him back, so why weren't you doing any—

"W- we could kiss?" you suggested quietly, cheeks warming up at your own suggestion.

"We could wh- what now?" Jisung repeated, feeling as if his ears have fooled him. Did you actually want to kiss him?

"K- kiss," you muttered, looking away from him. "But n- nevermind. I completely understand if you don't want to—"

"But I want to." The words come out of his mouth quicker than his brain could process them, his face slowly growing hot once again.

He clamped his mouth shut when he heard your small giggle, his heart beating at a pace quicker than he had ever thought was humanly possible. Maybe he should take Hyuck's advice and really do think before he speaks...

Your face slowly neared his and he sucked in a breath when he felt yours fan his face. He closed his eyes when your nose touched his and he felt just about ready to faint when your lips lightly brushed against each other—

Then you pulled away. What?

Did he somehow do something wrong this time? No, he doesn't think he did. You initiated it... whatever that was.

Did his breath smell like shit? No, he almost choked on his mouthwash earlier when he heard you knock on his door.

Did he smell like shit? He didn't think so, at least. He took a shower and changed into your favorite hoodie of his as soon as you told him you were coming over. Maybe he should've asked Jaemin to wash the hoodie though...

"Y/n?" he asked concernedly, opening his eyes to see you place a hand over your face. Did he really smell that bad? "Is there anything wrong?"

"I- I just feel like—" you cut yourself off with a sneeze and Jisung jumped a bit. You giggled. "Sneezing. Sorry."

"You scared me," Jisung huffed, heaving out a relieved sigh. "I thought I smelled bad or something there."

"I never said you didn't," you said, biting back a giggle when he makes a face at you. "Kidding! Kidding. You smell like you always do. Like... you."

"And that's a good thing, I hope?" he asked, scrunching his nose at you, finally getting a giggle out of you.

You nodded, scooting closer to him on the couch and giving him a small smile, face right in front of his once again. "Yes. That's a very, very good thing."

"Good," Jisung said, eyes flickering down to your lips. He inhaled and looked back up at your eyes. "So... uh... no more sneezing?"

You shook your head with a chuckle, leaning in even closer to him. "No more sneezing."

He mirrored your smile, closing the gap between you slowly despite his brain screaming at him to hurry up. With you, Jisung had all the time in the world. Besides, it was your first kiss together and it just had to be perfect, right?

Well, not necessarily.

"Well, fucking finally!" someone exclaimed as the door burst open, making you and Jisung fling yourselves to the opposite ends of the couch, cheeks flushing red at the sudden interruption.

"Chenle, you idiot," Renjun sighed as he pushed the younger boy into the hallway.

"Oh, whoops," Chenle grinned sheepishly, catching Jisung's glare. "Sorry."

"Don't mind us~" Jaemin hummed, pushing Haechan and Jeno into the hallway with Chenle and Renjun before any of them could interrupt any more. "We'll be in our rooms if you need us."

An awkward silence once again fell over the room as soon as all the doors closed, both of you refusing to look at each other in the eyes.

Jisung let out a little huff of annoyance and embarrassment. Why hasn't anything gone his way today?

The articulate and carefully worded confession he had prepared for you at least months before today, somehow vanishing as soon as he opened his mouth.

The comfortable atmosphere he had tried his absolute best to set up, disappearing into thin air after you had clumsily voiced out your own feelings for him.

And the perfect first kiss he had originally wanted to give you, left as a passed opportunity as each of your two attempts ended up in unexpected and completely uncalled for interruptions.

He didn't even want to think of anything else that could possibly go wrong.

"Third time's the charm?" you had suggested hopefully, turning your head to look at him.

"A- are you sure you still want to, uh, you know..." Jisung mumbled, looking down at his feet. "Kiss me? Even after everything that's gone wrong?"

You took initiative and slid over to his side of the couch, giving him a soft smile that never failed to melt his heart every single time. "Jisung, I still wanted to kiss you even after you pretty much blew up the whole Chemistry lab in ninth grade."

You chuckled, taking one of his large hands in both of yours. "You smelled like dog piss, your hair was standing up stiff, and you had toxic powder and whatnot all over your face. I don't think anything can top that, and yes, I still want to kiss you, you idiot."

Jisung couldn't help but laugh at the memory, shaking his head when he remembers the disgusted look on your face as you dragged him to the nurse's office, cleaning him up when even the nurse herself didn't dare go near him.

"Even if I'm no good at kissing?" Jisung asked, looking up at you.

"Even if you're no good at kissing," you laughed. "And don't worry, I'm probably just as bad as you are at this stuff. We both aren't single for no reason."

"Maybe we can change that?" Jisung asked, mouth working quicker than his brain once again, his reddening ears making it more obvious. "No, I mean—"

"Actually, I'd like that," you giggled, a wide grin spreading across your face when you see his sheepish smile. "I'd very much like that. So... you're my boyfriend now?"

"I'm your boyfriend now?" Jisung echoed, feeling as if he was in a daze, smile getting way too big as his cheeks began to hurt. Did he just get upgraded from best friend to boyfriend? "That sounds very nice..."

"Yes, yes it does," you said with a chuckle, witnessing the boy's brain turn into complete mush in front of you. "Now... do I get to kiss my boyfriend yet?"

His heart fluttered when you brought your hand up to his jaw, turning his head so he fully faced you. "Maybe, if we don't get interrupted again."

"But if we do get interrupted again?" you hummed, lips against his once again, the awkwardness suddenly gone as you were both filled with giddy excitement from the recent relationship upgrade.

And as if the god of interruptions was listening in on your conversation, just as Jisung opened his mouth to respond, his best friend's timing was impeccable.

"Oops," Chenle snickered, entering the living room once again. "I forgot my airpods—"

And without letting the other boy finish, nor let you shy away from him again, Jisung took a hold of your chin to gently keep you in place as he finally pressed his lips to yours, his brain a few steps late as he let his actions get ahead of himself once more.

"Shit, sorry, Y/n," Jisung apologized with wide eyes and red cheeks, realization of what he's just done hitting him like a brick. "I just— mmf!"

But instead of letting him splutter out an excuse for his spontaneity, you roll your eyes, capturing his lips in another, proper kiss. Until a sneaky little idea popped into your head.

You pushed him further into the couch, making the other boy watching feign retching sounds in the background as the two of you patiently waited until he left, only parting for air when you hear his footsteps finally leave the room.

"You think that'll stop him from interrupting us again?" you asked, giving him a cheeky grin, laughing when you see the dazed smile left on the boy's face.

"I don't know what's kept me from kissing you all these years," Jisung breathed out with a laugh, heart causing ruckus in his ribcage. "But I don't think even Chenle coming in screaming and holding up a bazooka will be able to stop me from kissing you anymore."