#oh my GOD i'm so angry
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Hey able bodied people SHUT THE ACTUAL FUCK UP AND NEVER TYPE THIS SHIT TO A DISABLED PERSON
#disability#disabled#youtube#comment#don't want to fucking respond#just rage#cpunk#cripple punk#ableism#able bodied#discrimination#oh my god I'm so angry#soooooo angry#also I'm a wheelchair user those parking spaces are not solely for us
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hi. unlabeled person here. i consider myself a part of the LGBTQ+ community. i don't identify as queer. come at me, bro.
#i am SO SICK of the way everybody has to fuckin' gatekeep EVERYTHING#even among a community that's meant to be about feeling safe and finding support for those of us who don't conform to a “norm”#but it gives some people out there some kind of sense of superiority to FORCE other people into labels they are NOT COMFORTABLE WITH#for no other reason than it makes you feel you're in the RIGHT#listen. i'm a science person. i understand the urge to want to categorize everything.#but people's IDENTITIES are not something that fit neatly into boxes#let alone a single specific box#some of us have really good reasons for not identifying as queer and those reasons should be respected#and fuck. even if we didn't. THAT STILL DOESN'T GIVE YOU THE RIGHT#just FUCKING ACCEPT PEOPLE AS WHO THEY TELL YOU THEY ARE#just nod your head and move the fuck on#plus as i have said a bajillion times and i'm sure will say a bajillion MORE times: CELEBRITIES DON'T OWE YOU THEIR SEXUALITIES#CELEBRITIES DON'T OWE YOU SHIT#STOP ASSUMING YOU KNOW THEIR LIVES AND THEIR REASONS BETTER THAN THEY DO#oh my GOD i'm so angry#i'm gonna stop tag-ranting before my head explodes#thanks for coming to my TED talk k bye
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Old redraw of an even older drawing ☺️ They are the father and son ever. To me (please don't tag as ship!)
#hetalia#hws america#hws england#aph america#aph england#myart#tea dad n coffee son#atlantic bros#that's the tag for their platonic relationship i think? delighted there is one 🥺#technically a repost since i originally posted it on my main 5 years ago but i deleted the og bc i got an angry ask for posting hetalia LOL#so figured i'd properly post it again here! i'm very fond of this piece still...#father/son england and america is my fav relationship in hetalia 😭💖 they are everything to me#this time it was hetaoni that dragged me back but they're often what gets me rotating hetalia in my mind again all of a sudden :')#this redraw is from 2019 and the original was from 2014.... the og's 10 years old now oh my god. time flies#even this one is 5 years old already.... mayhaps i should do yet another redraw of it. i will consider#on an unrelated note i finally got around to making my mobile theme a little nicer :) maybe i'll make an intro or something sometime
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its so funny that all minute—the guy who once upon a time hoped to redeem zam—'s team has accomplished is getting him to consider giving up his remaining honor in order to match the level they're playing on ?
#m#lifesteal#i can't stop thinking about minute&co dismissing the argument about how they've encouraged players#to ban themselves and thus contradicted their own stated goal#the way 'peaceful ending' warped into 'it doesn't matter what we do so long as we can flip a switch at the end' but what the fuck happens#in a scenario where you unban everyone who you've pissed off ? are they happy? is that peace? and you won't even defend the choice!#what the fuck is happening here!#you laugh at zam for saying he's won but you won't have the argument that you know you'd lose ^_^#none of this is angry in tone i'm having fun. thisis my bread and butter. i'm happy lifesteal is weird and tense again#enjoying that it's looped this far around into the ACTIVE dismissal of rp-logic where zam&co are having to say 'okay then#we'll win This game too!'#them acting dismayed that mapicc wouldn't walk into that obsidian box. like oh my god#and it's so different from the weird tenseness of s4 it's something different entirely. new meta conflicts just for me !????#we'll see how it all ends.... they might make me mad again but we'll cross that bridge#it's so different from the Vitalasy Incident even though both involve people functioning in opposition to lifesteal's 'storytelling rules'#for vi it was because of his emotional investment. it manifested in nothing but endless 'character-level' debate in the lead up and#plenty of emotional roleplay from vitalasy in the aftermath#vi's primary effect on season 4 through the wormhole was to render lifesteal's gameplay obsolete#pb&j's primary effect is instead to focus intently on Winning that game while everything else falls by the wayside
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I did not just see someone claim the SA scene in DanDaDan is fanservice because Momo is half-naked... What- What do you think a SA scene is supposed to look like????
#ALSO YOU ARE THE ONE SEXUALIZING HER OH MY GOD SHUT UP 😭😭😭😭😭#i already posted about this yesterday but it makes me so angry i'm sorry#dan da dan#momo ayase
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Can I be real for a second? I don't think L giving a foot massage to Light was very in-character of him. Like manga!L would've totally scoffed at how pathetic anime!L appeared when he did that.
I like the rain scene bc it's really pretty (also Light MOANS bc of L? *sighs* yeah i ship lawlight) but I'm always so ?? at anime!L's behavior? The anime made L way too melancholic and y'know self-deprecating kinda guy. In contrast, manga!L (whom I love to death) is so so confident in doing what he's doing and has the time of his life during the Kira case as he's intellectually challenged (by Light) as he figures out the case little by little.
I don't get where the anime creators got the idea that L is a very sad character who cares about justice so much so that he's actually Justice itself? Manga!L enjoys solving cases. I'm not saying that L doesn't care about justice at all- just that he cares more about winning.
So, the anime creators looked at a character who cares about winning (& his own ego) than everything else and decided to... make him give a foot massage to his nemesis (surprise surprise bible symbolism featuring L as Jesus *🤮* coming up) apparently due to accepting Light's (boy's first debut as Judas) 'betrayal' how can there be betrayal when there was no trust between them in the first place and saying "It is the least I can do to atone for my sins"...
The only way I could've made a little sense of this is if L was mocking Kira with that line but the anime just had to go above & beyond to make it (L's actions) seem too genuine for that to be true. which is. so. FRUSTRATING
Manga!L wouldn't have done anything like that. Not even ironically (he'd have thought it to be below him for pretending to be accepting his defeat mockingly to Kira). Even Manga!L's not enough of a bastard to try to compare himself with Jesus (and just after knowing (god knows how) that he's going to die)- like that's too stupid omg: even for a mockery.
Does he actually think that Light would pick up on the (him as Jesus) symbolism and be like 'oh no! L is too noble like Jesus to die by my betrayal i'm such a bad judas how come i NEVER NOTICED THIS BEFORE'... and decide to spare L's life? Or embrace his inner Judas like the bad bitch he is and finish L for that godawful mockery of Jesus?
Whenever I think about Anime!Light's in-character reaction I crack up as it would be smth like 'wow this guy who graduated summa cum laude from torture university is pretending to be Jesus? lol what a real piece of work. would've expected better from you L: so pathetic lmao i hope rem kills you soon i'm so done with you rn- rip 💀'
Manga!L (if he knew he were going to die (don't know how that's possible in the anime; still we're talking about how the anime creators seem to see L as Jesus so ~anything is possible~) that is) would never go 'guess i'll die' accept his defeat offering a foot massage to his enemy and inwardly throw a pity party being all "… It'll be lonely, won't it?" GIRL you were the one going on & about how you'd EXECUTE Kira once you catch him on live tv (also saying that you'd bring Kira's head to the task force) I REALLY doubt you'd feel lonely if either one of you were to die- that (killing each other) was the point!!
Manga!L is a selfish character: he values his victory above all else so the anime making him accept defeat that easily + gracefully doesn't sit well with me.
#death note#l lawliet#light yagami#manga vs anime#manga!L#anime!L#anime!Light#the rain scene#the foot massage scene#yes i ship lawlight; no i don't think the rain scene was very faithful to L's character in the manga; yes we exist#as you can see i rlly RLLY don't like anime's take on L: i prefer the og manga!L :)#anime!L just isn't my cup of tea#manga!L's confidence in his assholery is much rather appreciated#i keep thinking about how i don't like certain parts of dn anime: the first of which being this rain scene#the second being how the anime handles Sayu's kidnapping and Light's reaction to it#but that's a can of worms i'll open later#i can't shut up apparently so here's a teaser: Light wouldn't have MURDERED Sayu OH MY GOD READ THE GODDAMN MANGA#in which he bends over backwards to protect her! and succeeds!! (at the cost of losing the death note to Mello) would you look at that??#yeah i'm aware anime!Light doesn't kill Sayu but the way he's shown seriously considering it#(and choosing to let her live only so as to not increase suspicion)#leaves me so ANGRY#SAYU MEANS A LOT TO LIGHT OK?#he would not fucking do that#aaaaand....end rant#p#my meta#sorta#100
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You're telling me Villyth is fourteen and was dating a 17 year old. You're telling me the person that I've seen being bashed all this time is FOURTEEN, a fucking pimpsqueak in age. You're all joking right? Are you people fucking deranged beyond basic human decency??? A fourteen year old does something wrong about important real life topics and you guys JUMP them before educating them — and this isn't the first goddamn time either! I get the sentiment if defending your moral standpoint, but the execution is distasteful, diselegant, pitiful, it puts you next to people who send death threats over different opinions — WHICH HAS HAPPENED WITH YOU LOT. Do better, especially considering they've dodged a BULLET of a relationship. And for crying out LOUD, stop ganging up on Villyth's friends. Have some decent fucking common sense at ONCE in this rotten community. Jesus!
【 See tags for additional rambles if you'd like. 】
#not defending their bad wording/actions. but some of you are WAY older and know WAY better than this#Grow the fuck up and stop dogpiling on YOUNG people for struggling with words or making mistakes or not caring about discourse (syscourse)#Or choosing to not be involved in certain things#I'm gonna fucking stab myself THK boss style. You guys... Oh my god this fucking sucks.#Also#The 17 year old is NurseDollie#Im so glad this person has me blocked for petty discourse. What a fucking weirdo. Imagine dating a fourteen year old at SEVENTEEN#That's a monumental maturity gap. That's a INSANE maturity gap. I was that age when my 16>17 groomer was with me.#A red flag if I've seen one. At all#buhgposting#buhggytalk#hissy bug tag#<- for when im angry. if youd prefer to hide it#𓏵⠀unsorted trinkets⠀♡#editblr
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I don't like the way you guys talk about Palestinians asking for donations. I don't like it.
I had to see someone make MULTIPLE posts bitching and moaning about how people need to stop sending them asks asking for them to reblog their donation posts, that they'd just be blocking them from now on, and that they didn't care if they were vetted because they still found the act of sending asks to get reblogs on their donation links suspicious, even if they were in a dire situation. They even went as far as to say that they got an ask, deleted it, and then they got another ask from the same person, and accused the person of sending another ask to purposefully "get under their skin"
I don't know man, have you considered that being a victim of ongoing genocide will make you ask for help in whatever way you can? And sometimes that involves sending random blogs asks to see if they can donate or at the very least share your donation links? A Palestinian reaches out to you multiple times because they need help and your response is to whine about getting donation links in your inbox? I wish I had your problems
Also the thing about "getting the exact same ask from the exact same blog multiple times"... uh, duh? First of all, they're probably reaching out to dozens of blogs daily, do you think they're gonna type up a new paragraph for each blog they reach out to? Second of all, maybe they reached out to you multiple times because a. They really really really need the help and b. What, do you think they're gonna see your URL/blog and be like "oh! I already reached out to this blog, I'm not gonna send them another ask"? Or do you think they'll be like "this person has been reblogging other people's donation posts, maybe they'll reblog mine too"?
Like I understand being suspicious about getting sent donation links to your inbox, but literally all you have to do is check if the blog's been vetted by other bloggers? It's as easy as searching for their URL on tumblr sometimes, it literally takes less than a minute or two. And that's what bothers you? That's what you're complaining about? Find a real problem!!!
#if you recognize the person i'm specifically talking about in this post please don't harass them but i got SO angry when i saw their posts#last night they made a post saying that a scammer reached out to them so i looked up the 'scammer's' url and they were vetted by more than#one blogger so i commented on their post to let them know that#and today i remembered that and was wondering if they saw my comment so i went to their blog and found they deleted the post and instead#made like four posts about what i just described. what the actual fuck is wrong with some of you people. get a real problem oh my god!!!#i'm not mad about them deleting their original post btw i'm mad about the other shit they posted#if they had. idk. been nice in their posts i mayyybe would've let it slide but no they were FUMING they were so mad. that's what really#upset me. like genuinely how dare you#it's really not that hard to check if the blog that reached out to you is a scam or not. like literally palestinian bloggers on this site#have been working day and night to let us know which blogs are real and which aren't. donate to the fundraisers share them and get a real#problem or shut the fuck up about donations for the rest of your life#palestine#free palestine#cat rambles#i said this on discord but decided i wanted to talk about it here too so i reworded a bit of what i said on discord but it's mostly the same
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𝗠𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝗚𝗮𝗹𝗲'𝘀 𝘃𝘂𝗹𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗿𝗮𝘃𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗽 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘂𝗺𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗲𝘀, 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗠𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗽𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿. This lengthy headcanon will refer to canon dialogue from mostly Gale, sometimes others. Reader's discretion is advised. There will be in depth explorations into grooming, emotional abuse, heavy manipulation, and suicide.
First, let it be said that Gale, a mortal man, will always be the powerless one in his dynamic with Mystra. Of course, nearing forty years of age, he remains entirely responsible for his own actions, his own blunders and every hurt he'll cause, but it's important to remember who formed much of who he is: his goddess, his deity, and egregiously, his lover.
Mystra is power. Mystra is possibility. She knows what sway she holds over her Ioyal, vulnerable, and entirely mortal followers. In all ways that matter, they are but lambs she can steer and herd as she sees fit. She knows they can't deny her and knows they'll never want to. Gale's sheer servitude and complete devotion. Mystra, knowing that, used him to filth.
Gale: I was just... practising an incantation. Player Character: No, there's more to it than that. I know devotion when I see it. Gale: What can I say? She's—she's Mystra. I can't describe it, the need I sometimes feel to see her - to draw the filaments of fantasy into existence... Mystra is all magic. And as far as I'm concerned, she is all creation. Player Character: I didn't realize the depth of your devotion. Gale: Magic is... my life. I've been touched with the Weave for as long as I can remember. There's nothing like it.
Gale, orb in his chest, doomed to be eaten by the very thing he loves the most, still speaks so reverently of the goddess, of his lover that has left him to die. He conjures images of her memory—and she is all the while forgetting about his.
Minsc: Gale reminds me of vremyonni of my homeland. The man-mages of Rasheman. While the girl-folk go on to rule as wychlaran, Weave-touched boys were hidden away. Trained to work their craft in silence and secrecy. It is an old custom, not well-observed. In truth, I thought it born of caution after some catastrophe of wizardly men-folk of old. Now, I wonder if it was not done to hide them from Mystra, and the snares she sets for young and prideful boys, hm?
Tales of Mystra's treachery spreads far, leaving those familiar waters surrounding Gale's tower in Waterdeep. They whisper her name, afraid to utter it one time too many, suspecting, perhaps, that she'll show in their mirror like some Faerûnian Bloody Mary.
Talent rouses Mystra. She can see who uses the gift of the Weave and feel them, sampling whatever delight sings their veins as they pull from her domain. Not unlike a spider, she'll follows every tremor that strikes her as just a sliver more profound; and Gale, a prodigy, plucked the Weave's web to so garner her focus. And like some black widow scurrying, she surged down that ripple to prey on a boy. There, Gale, so impressionable, was just a mite older than twelve whole summers. He sat so stunned, beholding Mystra as she lured him into the cradle of her Astral domain. Bathed in her magic, pleasantly coddled within that glittering cosmos, Gale felt blessed in a way he'll struggle always to recount, no word, no language, fit to describe it. He felt chosen. He felt seen. And potently, to a child, he felt loved. Now, imagine a child experiencing something like that. Imagine what they'd think, how brilliant they must be when stood beside the rest. She told him he was gifted, made his heart swell not unlike a child's appetite for praise. She knew what she was doing by offering these morsels, by preying on a child's most delicate mind, and Gale, child prodigy, was already so awash in the idea that his value was in magic. Unfortunately, Gale, susceptible, had no way of squirming out of his goddess' grasp.
Reality: She's laid down the seeds to creep into his heart. When he's just old enough—seventeen's sufficient, she thinks—she stakes her claim and makes him hers.
Gale: My virtuosic talent once caught the eye of the goddess of magic herself, Mystra, who named me her chosen and her lover.
Gale is stunned when she takes him to bed the first time. (Is this really happening?) Mystra claims his mouth in a kiss, taking everything she knows he offers so willingly. Mystra, of course, is not so stunned.
Dream Visitor: An elder brain... one of the cruelest and most powerful creatures in existence, enslaved by mere mortals. Gale, tasked with Mystra's missive to sacrifice himself: This is it... I must do as Mystra commands.
Gale has worryingly low self-esteem beyond his magic. As already explored, his entire worth as a man hinged on and was built entirely off his talent as a wizard. He fought tooth and nail for any crumb of affection Mystra would offer his way, something she only gave him at all seeing his gift as a child. He wants her forgiveness. He desires it genuinely. He believes so firmly that he has wronged his goddess, buying into the idea that sacrificing himself will right his wrong. She holds such dominion over him, making him reduce his confidence in himself into a mere, trifling pittance; after all, she wasn't just his lover, but the patron deity he prays to. And regardless, Gale is a people pleaser, his initial acceptance of her missive coming as no surprise.
After all, Gale, at times, goes to incredible lengths to appease his audience. This habit, compulsion, impulse, whatever you want to call it, is a quality that was relentlessly exacerbated in his relationship with his immortal paramour. He wanted to content her, felt all he did was never enough, for as a matter of principle, he was oceans, leagues, and entire galaxies beneath her. Gale figures: well, how can a short-lived dalliance satisfy a god? He had to make her happy. Indeed, he'd done everything she'd ask. He'd bedded her how she liked, kissed her how she wanted, and of course, even said those words she'd said tasted best. She was his lover, a lover that never tended to his own needs and pleasures, and he fooled himself into thinking that's enough. He won't bend backwards for everyone, mind you, but if you're of the ones he would, he would stop at nothing to make you happy. After all, people pleasing is a way to keep oneself safe, a trauma response to sidestep discomfort, and though it achieves only a direly tentative peace, when that is all you've been fed, you will pursue it.
Gale did not want to lose Mystra; he couldn't bare the sting of it. And so, when Elminster visited him, Mystra's call for his death offered oh so callously, Gale, heartbroken, felt that part of him kick up. He couldn't endure the guilt, was so hungry for a chance to let his weighty heart breathe, even if it meant dying in the process.
At least this way, he'll finally do something right. At least this way, Mystra will forgive him, and all his friends will survive.
Gale: After I was afflicted with my condition, I locked myself in my tower for an entire year. I was inconsolable, wallowing in my self-inflicted tragedy. I'd given up on myself.
As a byproduct of people pleasing, Gale, too, is all too quick to accept all guilt. He self-deprecates, gaslights himself to a venomous degree, and twists his reality in so cruel a way as to make him the villain Mystra'd led him to believe. He self-flagellates himself, the first one in the world who will throw Gale of Waterdeep a mental punishment. Mystra's a goddess, after all, seen as utterly faultless, and twined so tightly with a being so mighty in esteem, Gale slipped into the role of the guilty often. When tied with anyone with grandeur like this, so immeasurable in their own self worth, it's important to keep in mind this: you are nothing but a prop in which to fulfill their ego. Gale was not Mystra's, not by a long shot. Rather, Gale was a tool, simply her mortal extension.
And he took every blow meant for her... a common and terrible habit for many people in imbalanced, ego-fueled relationships.
Gale's life beyond her wasn't something that interested her. She took most of Gale's devotion, manipulated his life to be her sole mantle of attention, for Mystra is not a goddess that shares very happily.
Indeed, long before his self-imposed isolation, this jealous deity did well at keeping him isolated.
Player Character: Picture kissing him. With tenderness. Then, with passion. Gale: I... I didn't think— Narrator: You perceive quick-fire embarrassment, trepidation, and finally... elation.
And so, cheated out of love, so reduced in his value as a man and lover both, suffice to say, Gale's slow to believe he can ever be loved. That's what happens when you're with someone so cold, consistent only in their infinite lack of respect. Gale looks at fondness, and he feels—confounded, to be sure. He thinks, is this truly mine to have? He doesn't know what to do, is nearly forty in game, and despite having lived decades devoted to one relationship, he feels, at the same time, entirely out of depth. To be frank, he greets it with embarrassment, like he's been caught red handed with something not his at all. He's like a child caught rummaging with his hand in a cookie jar, all this isn't mine to enjoy, not mine to indulge in, but he thinks, startled, but god, do I want. He wars with disbelief, uncertainty, and need, and in so many ways feeling utterly starved, with just a glimmer of affection, he falls fast into love.
Scenario: (And if properly romanced, it changes his world.)
Gale: In her (Mystra's) likeness, I used to read a thousand stories. She was beauty, wisdom, elegance, power... she contained universes. But now... it is hard to see any redeeming qualities in a lover who condemned you to death. I'd much rather gaze into your eyes than hers. Yours are capable of tenderness and feeling... No god could ever compare.
He says it with sincerity. There is such wonder, such love, and such awe in his eyes. He makes the act of kissing him feel like you've just reached into the trenches to but pluck him soundly from his ruin and despair. You think, Gale Dekarios, how unloved have you been all this time?
Gale: To know you love me for the man I am, and not the magic I command… none have loved me so purely before.
The answer is: entirely.
For so long, Gale thought love was simply being chosen. He knew nothing of being favored for the quality of his character, to be cherished and accepted even in those ways he fumbles and lacks. Again, his needs were seldom met, often treated with utter indifference by Mystra herself, and to meet someone so eager to treasure him, dote on him in a way his heart, his body is somberly new to, raptures his spirit and captures his soul. He's seen for who he is. He's... loved, desired for his silly quips, his easy smiles, and his growing affections. He bares himself to them, and in turn, they cradle his heart like something entirely precious. Gale thinks this has to be dream. He says, at times, you are more than I deserve.
Scenario: (But sometimes, he hopes too strongly and loves too greatly. As it always does, then, like he's once more wanted too much, he watches something beautiful slip right through his fingers. Of course, Gale Dekarios. Of course it does.)
Player Character: I didn't know you felt so strongly, Gale. Gale: Perhaps I should have done more. Been more charming, more flattering, harder to reach... but I was only myself, and sometimes that isn't enough.
They don't love him anymore. It breaks his heart. He hurts so much, so profoundly and deeply, and he doesn't realize that he breaks their heart in turn.
Unable to ever voice his feelings with Mystra in any way that amounted to much, Gale's a tendency to wallow, expressions coming off as potentially 'guilt-tripping' and even, on occasion, passive aggressive. Firstly: Gale NEVER means to manipulate emotions, and he's no intention of twisting anyone's arm, either. Fact is, Gale, never taken seriously when he'd bared his vulnerabilities to the Mother of the Weave, can end up saying just a little too much. He feels very deeply, and for most his life, seldom had an outlet for these weeping sentiments. He sometimes lets slip raw words and oftentimes heart-wrenching expressions; all the same, it's not so pitiful as to shepherd an outcome, but rather, is a gesture taken by a man so desperate to be heard. It may feel like scheming, but the truth is far, far greyer: feeling as though he's no right to share the depth of his heart, Gale simply lets it geyser out in a way he can't cork up. In ways he doesn't realize, he's adapted to this ache, passively reacting so his feelings can at least be seen and recognized—no matter how pitifully unwhole. With someone who values so little his thoughts... well, when he slips into these moods, one can hardly feign shock.
Situation: (And if no one shows him trust and tenderness, any true care in his character or worth, Gale gets swallowed up by how wronged he was.
He thinks: Let me be a god. Let no one hurt like me anymore.)
Gale: They only want us to serve them, pray to them...and ultimately, to die for them. But what if we didn't need them? What if we wielded their power instead and helped ourselves in all the ways they refuse to? I could make that happen.
Gale is not above anger, and as stated, he is not above pettiness; however, more than that, he is not above righting himself whatever wound he was struck. Gale, if not offered much by ways of affection, understanding, is made to believe that one idea that's lived growing in his mind: Gale Dekarios is far from sufficient; he has to be more. He has to be better. Gale, in such an unkind ending for himself, sips too desperately—and perhaps greedily, too, but desperately serves as a far better word—at that idea that he needs power. And so, wresting the Crown of Karsus for himself, he spites Mystra in his own way, becoming a god he feels is leagues better than she will ever be. Damn her thoroughly. Damn her ego, her power, and her endless indifference. He will serve the people, protect them, and in ways Mystra never could, better the world.
Situation: But as a god, he loses all sense of his kindness. Humanity. All who loved him leave him, and even Tara spurns the image he's become. With power, he's gained the respect he thought he always wanted... but in turn, he lost in even greater measure all the love he's known.
Endnote: But healing, knowing to forgive himself and knowing he's deserving of care simply for being Gale Dekarios will remain, always, the best path for him.
#HEADCANON.#Oh... anyway. This. Was. A lot.#And it was a lot for me mentally and emotionally to write.#So much of this hit home.#Gale isn't perfect. He can be petty and immature—a byproduct of not being all too good at venting his frustrations when#it gets to a point. He has very bad self esteem. He is not forgiving of himself and is too forgiving of Mystra.#He endured FOR DECADES the cold indifference of a goddess he called his lover.#I know people dog on him because he's a grown man with these hurts and traumas and responses#but just because his trauma manifested in ways you don't find palatable or hot or sexy#doesn't mean they aren't scars left by trauma buddy!!!#And quite frankly that bit about God Gale sounding vindictive and angry#yeah! SOMETIMES people who have so cold and uncaring and belittling a partner#end up angry. You shoved someone into a corner and hounded them for SO LONG. Don't start crying when they rear back on you and bite#I have a deep connection with godhood Gale. But obviously a healed Gale that finds love and acceptance in himself is so much healthier.#I'm rooting for you Gale (always).#So much of this was typed up with a lot of first hand experience so... to say this was a Gale exploration#as much as a way to navigate my own trauma is an apt one.#No two tales of abuse are alike of course. Gale's experience isn't my experience. But I can sympathize a great deal.#TL;DR: This meta post means a lot to me. K. Thanks.
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I've reached season 5 on my CSI rewatch and I'm a few episodes past "Swap Meet", where a woman is murdered after attending a swing party with other couples from the neighbourhood. Near the end of the episode there's a moment that made me jump from my seat:
(Grissom walks up to Sara and takes the seat next to her. He's holding two cups. He hands her a cup of tea.)
[INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT - BRASS' OFFICE]
Erin Brady: Everybody fantasizes about other people. (She glances at Grissom.)
Even you, Mr. Grissom. A neighbor, a friend ... girl at the office.
[INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT - HALLWAY]
(The door opens. Paul Brady walks out of the hallway. Erin Brady walks out into the hallway. Sara is sitting in the hallway chair watching them. She watches as they meet and kiss.)
(Grissom walks up to Sara and takes the seat next to her. He's holding two culps. He hands her a cup of tea.)
LIKE!!!!!!!
Right after Erin ends her sentence with 'girl at the office', the first time Sara and Grissom meet again, he brings her tea. This might be an innocent interaction but to me it seemed like a nod to this relationship they have where both are into each other, know about the other's feelings, but can't/won't do anything about it (although Sara has kind of given Grissom an ultimatum). I don't know if it was intentional - I'm guessing it is, because I picked it up immediately. I might or might not have squealed in delight.
#csi#gsr#i'm very Normal about them btw i don't think about them 50 times per day or anything#need to talk more about these two here#because im obsessed about them in a Normal way#sara is like. my dream wife. i totally get grissom being in love with her for years and barely holding it together#i would not though#i'm 1000% sure she's bi. but the writers have been cowards so far#also she and i dress THE SAME. yes i love 2000s clothes so what#i could talk about her forever she's everything to me#and grissom. oh grissom. i also get why she's been in love with him forever#i mean what the FUCK went down in san francisco did they hook up and sex was so good it scared them#and now they have to live with that tension and they're scared of crossing that line#nah i'm guessing with these two they just REALLY clicked. like. they were an instant match and they knew it#but grissom didnt want to lose focus on work or whatever and they lived in separate states you know#but oh my god i totally get sara. grissom is such a silver fox. he's like one of the hottest old men i've ever seen in my life#you know what i 100% get tumblr sexualizing old men it's completely valid i'm in this now too#he has this LOOK. whenever he's angry at a suspect. and he looks angrily at them. i'm chewing on my keyboard just remembering it#and his smirks#AND THE WAY HE LOOKS AT SARA#im losing my mind#i love all of gil grissom but seasons 4-5 jesus fucking christ#ok enough with the sexualizing i love him as a character SO MUCH. he's absolutely fantastic#one of the things i love the most about him is that he doesn't judge people. whenever the team is confused about someone#or this persons' lifestyle#he's always trying to understand them and not judge them#like a true scientist he wants to understand the nature of things and people#and he's such a sweetheart i love him so much#like there are so many things i love about him i can't fit them all in the tags. same for sara#they're a perfect match for me
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Since we got news about modern adaptation of C&P, I started to think about "What these characters in 21th century would think about the fact that some random book from 19th century completely copies their life to the minor of details" and these are just some little doodles that came into my head
#my art#digital drawing#doddle#war and peace#crime and punishment#fathers and sons#eugene onegin#natasha rostova#rodion romanovich raskolnikov#rodion raskolnikov#raskolnikov#evgeny bazarov#bazarov#arkady kirsanov#vladimir lensky#lensky#sonya marmeladova#avdotya romanovna raskolnikova#dunya raskolnikov#I'm so angry that some people shit on natasha for no reasons and natasha herself would shit on natasha#not blaming her for not reading the whole thing she would be disappointed#rodya would be just sick from everyone. nothing new#bazarov just ignores that he has a copy of himself in a 19th century#I needed a way to introduce onegin so vladimir could just piss his pants#like “this from the novel is so shitty I'm so happy that he's not real OH MY GOD”#and dunya ready to kill anyone who hurts sonia. nothing new
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... what kind of ignoramus designed the EA app. Was this designed by a committee of corporate twits with too many business degrees and a complete dearth of common sense? Having to GO ONLINE to enable OFFLINE MODE is the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard of in my life. Do you know when I need offline mode? Do you, incomprehensible moron from planet idiot who designed this feature? WHEN I DO NOT HAVE GODDAMN INTERNET ACCESS.
In conclusion I hope the fuckwit(s) responsible for this step on a lego and fall down a (short) flight of stairs in front of three people they respect and acquire a RAFT of bruises to both their bodies and egos both, amen.
#like my internet came back in short order but oh my fucking god#this is among the stupidest and most user-unfriendly features I have yet encountered#just. how are people this stupid.#steam will try to boot in online mode and then automatically go into offline mode. that makes sense.#because it is a store yes but it is also HOW I ACCESS A GAME LIBRARY and it is AWARE of that secondary purpose#and so when one aspect of it wont' work it's like 'hey that's offline but here's your games'#it's fascinating how reading Scum Villain and falling in love with SQQ made me feel entirely free to be an angry bitch sometimes#I'm just like 'I know he displays angry internet troll tendencies maybe twice in the series while talking to another transmigrator'#'however; I love him regardless and he's fictional so people who really love me will not be upset if I rant occasionally'#I'm sure in desperation I could go find where the games are actually installed and launch them from there#but this is still SO STUPID I am somewhat aghast the people responsible are employed#there are so many people on this earth with sense#and somehow whoever inflicted this on the world has a job
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just a kind word for all of you lovely folks out there: if you say the r-slur or you don't call out your friends for saying it then i hate your guts :)
#melonposting#i'm writing my piece for the ada's open letter in our school newspaper. and oh my god i am so angry!!!!!!!!!!!! :D#like to kill an ableist reblog to kill an ableist. you know the drill#ughhhh my school is supposed to be super progressive and it is in a lot of ways#but hmmmm no punishment for saying the r-slur? people using autistic and sped and disabled and bipolar and psychotic as insults 24/7?#forgive me if my math is wrong but it just doesn't add up! :)#and don't get me started on people throwing around the term 'intrusive thoughts' like it's soooo cute and quirky#dude. i literally get intrusive thoughts. please leave the school building and never come back. expel yourself#'tee hee i let the intrusive thoughts win!!' and i will win in hand to hand combat against you. shut up#if you reading this are someone i know at school who did something like this don't come groveling to me#it doesn't help. if anything it just makes me feel guilty for calling you out#and for goodness sake you know i can't stand up for myself. please call people out for their sick bs when you know i can't#thank you :'D
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my family was just robbed of two thousands and my grandmother was denied a permanent residence card despite her daughter and grandchildren having lived here for 20 years and despite her being 80, so she can only spend a total of 90 days here in the next 5 years, and we can't visit her because we'll be arrested as soon as we cross the border, all this together meaning she will probably die alone there. and how are the rest of you all doing
#i'm so fucking sad and angry with all this#i made 10k last year but my family doesn't know so i'm considering taking the 2k from it to give to them like#'oh look he returned it after all how lucky how nice of him!!'#but God. like it's not my fault AT ALL that we're missing those 2k and i worked so hard for them...#also we're not criminals it's just belarus. we protested lukashenko out on the streets and we're in photographs.#you get jailed for even Liking an anti-lukashenko post on social media#and in terms of my family we're talking Writing anti-lukashenko articles#so... yeah#it's over#as soon as we cross the border#and people die in those jails! just recently a family friend was beaten to death#he was a painter#i'm. SO fucking tired of this#i am also not doing so hot but that'll have to wait fucking... forever because my father is retiring this winter#and my only access to healthcare was through his company health insurance#so 💙#mine
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hey oh my god i just found some of ur old batfam art and it's like so cool like seriously so cool, i figured ur probs not super in the fandom anymore but i still wanted to say you kinda altered my brain chemicals a little so thanks i love you
aaa tysm!!! you're right that i'm not really in the fandom anymore, but i'm glad you like my stuff from my time there, i actually learned so much from that little era (notably: improved my understanding of anatomy since so many of them wear spandex, got better at differentiating faces bc SO MANY dc characters have dark hair and blue eyes)
also i'm still pretty proud of a lot of the batfam stuff i made, especially jason getting interviewed, badcore, the infamous leverage reference people are always reposting from pinterest, vampire jason, "guy outside titan's tower says he's gonna goon your ass", and duke steps in
#splashasks#anonymous#what i have learned from compiling that list of 'past art of mine i still like' is i'm consistently happiest with comics. noted.#anyway yea batfam was fun#probably would have stayed longer if the fandom as a whole wasn't so like. angry#they weren't even angry at *me* i would have liked that better the baseline attitude was just generally kinda miserable#man i remember literally like a WEEK into my batfam fixation i had this moment of profound realization where i was like oh my god#the relationship between the nose and brow ridge is the key to differentiating faces#it makes SO MUCH SENSE if you think about it#bc it's a central structural feature that stays relatively stable no matter what expression someone is making!!#so your brain uses it as a reference point!!#and BECAUSE your brain uses it as a reference point people tend to not consciously notice it
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The meaning in a name: Oh-Bee-Toe
SO THIS HAPPENED. Yeah,,, I've been on a binge of drawing these two recently (I need to post some of the Actual Stuff but this took priotity for obvious reasons)...
ANYWAY, CRACK AU TIME
(Yes I know this doesn't work in the original Japanese. Yes I am choosing to put a Might-Guy spin on his name. No I do not regret this)
SO in this AU, Obito is named Obito bc his mother's first words upon his birth were "Oh! Bee-toes!"
His tragic backstory in this AU is that his toes stung his mother the first time she held him, and she was horribly allergic to bees.... She died holding him....
He was raised in his little years by the granny next door who happened to be a bee keeper...
#kakashi is realizing things about himself...#this is so cursed oh my god#this is what happens when I create as a coping mechanism...#same backstory for The World's Salvation lmao#I genuinely really like some of these panels lol#like. Obito asking whether Kakashi would rather he didn't wear shoes. and his little shocked/'that's kind of personal' expressions.#my favorite is the little angry/threatening kakashi. he's so smol. and the little “I'm in danger/bi” Obito.#nurt#kakaobi#naruto#obikaka#kkob#obkk#kakashi x obito#tobito#bee-toes#chearts#tumblr murdered the quality :(
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