#oh boy he might be worse than klaus

[tamlindudley]

Okay the more I think about it, the angrier I am getting. Not only did Chuck Fuck blame Blair for Jack when she went to him despite him making her skin crawl, doing something so terrible just to get Fuck his dumb hotel back !!!! but but buttt he thought they actually slept together, that she actually did the deed FOR HIM and he's happily taken his hotel back with no regrets thinking she actually went through with it and THEN when he finds out she didn't actually sleep with him, he's grinning and telling her then its all ok !! It meant nothing !! And he's trying to buy her back with gifts ??? I am actually about to throw things ????

[immeasurablesaladagere]

love the headcanonss!! Could you write a fic about viktor getting upset over dysphoria and shutting down please?? :)) no pressure, just when you have time!! Thanks salad!!

Here you go! We're ignoring all of canon timeline for this to make sense, I just want them to be getting along and in the mansion so shhhh

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Word Count: 1136

Summery: Viktor is regressed and struggling with dysphoria. Klaus helps by giving him the boy-est of boy experiences: playing in the mud.

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Today was an icky day, Viktor decided as he looked at his reflection in the mirror of his bedroom. He knew he should cover it up with a blanket, that’s what big-him did when looking in the mirror made him feel bad, but he couldn’t help but stare at himself. He had woken up regressed and floaty, so he got into his comfy little clothes; a brown sweater with a puppy on it, black shorts, and mis-matching white and blue socks. He didn’t feel so floaty anymore. His legs looked too big in the shorts and he didn’t wanna wear his binder because it hurt, so he could see the faint outline off his chest under the sweater.

He didn’t look like a boy. Even his face didn’t look like a boy’s face. He didn’t really look like a kid either, he looked like a tired adult like Diego and Allison. His haircut helped a little, but it wasn’t good enough. 

Other people probably wouldn’t think he was a boy if they saw him. That made something in his chest hurt. He didn’t really know why, because when he was actually little he didn’t care about that, but it made him sad now. Did his siblings think he was a boy when they saw him? The thought of them not thinking he was a boy made him feel even worse, because he loved them and he cared what they thought way more than random people. 

He needed an answer. He tore his eyes away from the mirror and walked down the hallway, scanning doors for anyone who might be around. His sibling’s rooms were all open and empty, which meant they were either staying somewhere else or having breakfast in the kitchen, so he decided to stop there next. 

The rest of the mansion seemed to be empty on his way down to the kitchen, which made him feel a little nervous. What if there was no one to look after him or talk to? He supposed he could talk to Pogo or Mama Grace, but they wouldn’t understand him. Pogo was too old for that and Mama Grace was a robot, so she didn’t know.

To his relief, someone was home. Sitting with their legs swung up on the kitchen table and eating a piece of plain toast was Klaus, reading something on their phone.

“Um… Klaus?”

Klaus looked up from their phone, took one look at his outfit, and gave him a big grin. “Well good morning, kiddo! Wake up small?”

Viktor nodded. He stared at the floor and fiddled with the hem of his sweater. “Klaus, I… have a question.” 

Klaus turned to give them their full attention, smile turning into a curious look. “Sure buddy, go ahead. I mean, as long as it’s not about the Birds and the Bees I—“

“Do you guys actually think I’m a boy?” He blurted. He could barely bring himself to look at Klaus’ reaction. They looked surprised, and Viktor didn’t know if that was a good or bad thing. Hopefully it wasn’t bad. He bit his bottom lip to stop it from wobbling.

After a moment of silence Klaus snapped out of their stunned daze. “Oh buddy, of course we do! What mean thoughts brought this on, honey?”

Klaus seemed like they were telling the truth, but he still didn’t feel better. “I don’t… feel like a real boy. I don’t look like one, an’ I don’t really do boy stuff.”

Klaus got up from the table and bent down in front of him. “Well now that’s just not true! I’m looking at you and I see the handsomest boy in the world. And what’s “boy stuff”?”

Viktor thought about it for second, then shrugged sheepishly. “I dunno… playin’ with cars an’ in dirt or something?”

“Playing in dirt, hm?” Klaus rubbed their chin dramatically, like they were thinking really hard. “I have an idea,” They said with a cheeky grin, “How about you get your swim trunks on and a shirt you’re okay with getting dirty, then come meet me in the courtyard, ok?”

“Oh, um… Ok.”

-

When he went out into the courtyard, dressed in his fishy swim trunks and black rashguard, the sun was bright and warm. It had been sad and rainy for the last few days, so Viktor was glad to see the it come out. Klaus was dressed in their own swim trunks and had a sprinkler and hose in their arms and a big bag of dirt at their feet.

“What are we doing?” Viktor asked curiously.

“You’ll see! Patience, grasshopper.” They said. They connected the hose to the nearby faucet and turned it on, creating a little river in the grass. Next, they grabbed the bag of dirt and tore it open. Viktor’s eyes widened as they dumped the entire bag onto the ground. Were they allowed to do that?

Klaus began spraying the pile with the hose, turning the loose dirt into a soupy puddle. Once they were satisfied they connected the hose to the sprinkler. “You, my friend, are about to experience the boy-est of all activities! Playing in the mud!” 

Viktor shrieked as the sprinkler sprayed him with cold hose water and he scrambled away through the muddy puddle, getting it all over his feet. He stared at them, then up at Klaus. Was this okay?

“That’s the spirit!” They encouraged, and to Viktor’s shock, they dropped back-first into the mud without hesitation. “C’mon little bro! Join me, you know you want to!”

He smiled. It did look kinda fun. He inched closer to the puddle and squeaked in surprise as Klaus’ muddy hand grabbed his own and pulled him in with them. He gasped as the cold mud splashed all over him, getting onto his hands, legs, face, everywhere. 

A small smile grew on his face, because he was being so bad right now. Dad would have yelled at him for making a mess, for being so unladylike. The thought made him feel like he was full of electricity. He felt so free, so happy, sitting in a puddle of muck in the courtyard. He looked up at Klaus, grinning widely.

“Mud fight!” He cried, and splashed a handful of mud onto them.

“Oh, you’re on kiddo!”

-

Viktor didn’t know how long they spent outside splashing each other and making mud pies with rocks and leaves, but by the time they were finished they were both covered in mud from head-to-toe. It was in his hair, in his ears, under his nails, and he couldn’t have been happier.

“Alright, quick! Get in the shower before Pogo catches us!” Klaus hurried, and Viktor ran off with a giggle, leaving a trail of muddy footprints behind him.

“…Before Pogo catches us doing what, Master Klaus?”

[auxiliarydetective]

Kassandra Hargreeves' Scenes, S01E03: Extra Ordinary

These scenes are mainly about relationships, but they also give some insight on her powers, her feelings and her morals.

Turn her off?

“Well, if her hardware is degrading, then… We need to turn her off.”

“Woah, woah, woah, woah, wait”, Diego cut in, knife pointed at Luther’s chest. “She’s not just a vacuum cleaner you can throw in a closet! She feels things, I’ve seen it!”

“She just stood there and watched our father die.” Luther insisted.

“I’m with Luther”, Allison said.

“Surprise, surprise.”

“Shut up.”

Now, both Luther and Diego were staring at Vanya. Kassandra felt sorry for her, especially when she started stammering.

“I- I don’t-”

“Yeah, she shouldn’t get a vote”, Diego decided.

“I was about to say I agree with you!”

“Okay, she gets a vote! What about you, stoner boy, what do you got?” he asked, looking at Klaus.

Klaus turned wide-eyed. “Oh, so what, you need my help now? Oh, ‘get out of the van, Klaus!’ ‘Welcome back to the van.’”

“What van?” Allison scoffed.

“What’s it gonna be, Klaus?” Luther inquired.

“I’m with Diego, because screw you! And if Ben were here, he would agree with me.”

“What about you, Kassandra?” Diego asked.

Immediately, Kassandra’s blood went cold. Until now, she had not thought about what to say.

“I… I think….”

“Come on, spit it out. You agree with me.”

“I… I don’t know. If her hardware really is-”

“She's our mother”, Diego growled. “Don’t start with that hardware bullshit!”

“What if she’s a danger to herself and or other people?”

“So what, you think she killed dad too?”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying!”

“I can’t believe you of all people would even have any questions about this”, Diego hissed. Kassandra found having his finger pointed at her was just as bad if not worse than a knife. “You, oh-so-empathic Kassandra! Our little saint!”

“Diego, please!”

“It’s because you can’t feel anything coming from her, isn’t it? She might as well be another machine to you!”

“She’s my mother too!” Kassandra shouted.

Then, she turned around on her heel and left. She had to go, get far away. Within her chest, her heart was trembling. But she had to swallow it down. No tears. Control your emotions. When had Diego gotten so aggressive towards her? It had to be this topic… It hit him right in the heart. Kassandra knew how much he loved Mom. But what he seemed to have forgotten or maybe didn’t know was that she, too, loved her. It was true, she couldn’t feel her around like she could feel humans, but she adored her. All the conversations, all the words of advice, all those hours spent cooking and baking together couldn’t just be forgotten. Kassandra already regretted what she had said. There was no evidence of Mom being a danger to anyone. Kassandra had let herself be contaminated by Luther’s paranoia. But now was not a time to apologize. It would be impossible if she did it now.

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄✼▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

Intruders

Out of the blue, a cold shiver went down Kassandra’s spine. It was a very familiar shiver. Danger. Slowly, she took off her headphones. The music was good for helping her ignore the thoughts constantly flooding into her brain, but now she needed them. What was going on? That was when she noticed something: There were unfamiliar voices in her head, and loud ones too. These people were close. Carefully, she slid off her bed and peeked out into the hallway. Nobody there. Only Klaus, in the bathroom, the door was open. But she wasn’t paranoid, there had to be someone there. Someone had invaded the house. Quietly, she snuck out into the hallway and looked around. The voices were coming from the other rooms. Luther and Allison’s, it seemed. Had these intruders come in through the windows? Either way, she had to tell someone. But these people probably kept it a secret that they were here, so… how was she supposed to do that? That was when she saw Diego turn the corner.

“Diego!” she whispered.

“What’re you whispering for?” he scoffed. “Are you ready to apologize for what you said about Mom?”

“Yes, more than ready”, Kassandra said quietly, “but we have a bigger issue. There are-” The rest of her words got stuck in her mouth as her lips pressed themselves shut all by themselves.

Diego sighed heavily. “No, not this. I know that face. You can’t tell me.”

Kassandra nodded quickly. Urgently, she pointed in the direction of Luther and Allison’s rooms. Suddenly, she was staring into the faces of two large, round masks, looking like they had come from a children’s carnival. One was a dog, the other a blue bear. Their large, cartoonish eyes stared right into her soul. Both masked invaders were armed with guns. Immediately, Diego shoved Kassandra away from them, just as they started firing.

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄✼▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

A Liability

“Who were those people?” Vanya asked.

“I don’t know”, Allison said. “But we are lucky to be alive.”

“Thanks again for saving me, Kass.”

Kassandra smiled as she cooled the back of her head. “Always happy to help. Are you sure you’re not hurt too badly?”

That was when a wave of dread rolled over her. She could feel something terrible had happened, grief and even worse guilt. It was like a thundercloud looming over all other thoughts flooding into her brain, overshadowing them. Then, like rumbling thunder, she learned what the reason for all this guilt and grief was: Diego had turned Grace off. The man himself came into the room only seconds later, pacing about and breathing heavily, as if his feelings had wrapped themselves around his lungs, squeezing them together.

“Diego?” Allison called his name.

But Diego didn’t react. His mind was starting all evasive maneuvers.

“What are you still doing here?” he asked, staring at Vanya.

“I’m just trying to help”, Vanya said.

“No, you could’ve been killed”, Diego growled. “Or gotten any of us killed. - She is a liability.”

Silence. Kassandra wanted to say something, but she knew she would not be able to get her point across. Diego was keeping what he did a secret. She wouldn’t be able to call him out because it was also the reason he was being like this. He was turning all of his emotions into anger again and letting them out on Vanya. Unable to react properly to the situation, Kassandra just stared at Diego. But that Allison also kept quiet worried her.

“Allison?” Vanya asked carefully.

Still no response.

“I think what he’s trying to say is that this kind of stuff is dangerous”, Allison finally said. “You’re just-”

“Not like you”, Vanya completed the sentence.

Silence again. There was nothing to say. As much as Kassandra disliked it, Allison was right. She herself was not the best fighter and she knew that, but Vanya had no training at all. She was too vulnerable to stay here. Annoyed and disappointed, Vanya started to leave, even though Allison followed her.

“Let her go”, Diego grumbled. “It’s for the best.”

Agreeing with Diego was even worse. Especially about something like this. But he was right and Kassandra hated it.

[dizzydancingdreamer]

“Corn Syrup, Like in Carrie” | The Mikaelson Boys

Hey my lovelies this is my fic for @hellotvshowtrash​ ‘s March Prompt Challenge— I hope you all enjoy and especially you, Ash! I literally wrote this in a few hours so I hope it isn’t terrible; I wanted to make sure I actually submitted this month though because you put a lot of hard work into making fun things for us. I haven’t written for these boys in a while so this was nice :)

Description: Y/n drags Kol into a plan that is more dumb luck than actual planning— is it even a question that he would be willing to help?

Pairing: The Mikaelson Boys x Female!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of blood and death but in a casual, funny way (sadistic but funny), this might be the grungiest thing I’ve written to date

Word count: 1.99k (it’s literally 1999k, I pushed this as far as possible)

Tags: Fluff, a lil angst if you squint (squint is used loosely here)

Prompt: “This plan of yours is going to get us killed. Of course I’m in.”

Kudos if you get the picture easter egg!

“You want to do what now?”

She huffs but the wicked smile on her face carves through the annoyance— of course she isn’t actually exasperated with him.

“You heard me Kol— I want to scare him!”

The brown eyed vamp rolls his eyes but his own grin is just as cunning. She can see the spark in his eyes, that little glint that lets her know everything she needs to know— lets her know that he’s in.

All in.

“You know that’s impossible darling,” he toys, his smirk too coy for a man over a thousand years old. “Klaus doesn’t get scared.”

She laughs— that’s what he thinks.

Kol’s brows push together, the glint growing alongside his smile, his sharp teeth poking into his lip. “I know that look— that look is never good.”

She meets him where he leans against the countertop, hopping up beside him and wrapping her arms around his cool shoulders. “Oh it’s good alright, Kol-y. I think you’ll like it very much.”

He turns towards her, running his nose across her jaw, peppering a few kisses against her skin before tilting his face up. “Well out with it then, darling— what’s the plan?”

She giggles, pressing her lips against his quickly before pulling back, pecking the vampire’s nose when he scrunches it. She shakes her head at his puppy dog eyes— easily distracted, that one is.

She leans down, whispering her idea into his ear, her chest blossoming with warmth when he shivers against her lips. She can’t tell if it’s because of how close she is or because he likes her plan— both, most likely. When she finishes speaking she nips his ear, tugging gently before releasing him. He groans when his ear meets the cool kitchen air, twisting to push between her legs.

He leans down, pressing his lips against her again. She can taste the mischief on his lips, tangy and sharp— someone has been eating blackberries again.

“You’re a menace darling.”

“Hmm—” she hums her agreement against his berry lips— “I learned from the best.”

He chuckles and this time she shivers, his lips trailing down her neck. “Is that so?”

She pushes against his chest, trying to regain some of his attention. This is important. She slips her fingers into his soft hair, knitting them between the strands and tugging until his baby browns meet her gaze. He sighs, his smile less menacing and more longing than moments ago. He raises his brow, his eyes flitting to her neck before going back to her eyes— are you going to speak or can I go back to what I was doing?

She huffs.

“Are you in or not, Mikaelson?” She grinds out as he tugs against her hand, just barely nipping at her sensitive skin.

He groans when she pulls her throat away from his ministrations, finally standing straight again. His hands slide up the sides of her neck, smoothing against her jaw, fingers hooking behind her ears.

“This plan of yours is going to get us killed, darling.” His soft grin sharpens as he speaks, the glint resurfacing in his eyes. To her it makes him look beautiful. It makes him look dangerous. “Of course I’m in.”

** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **

“Alright,” Kol announces, his cheerful voice drifting from the entrance to the compound to where she lays in a heap next to the couch. “He’s coming down the street now— I can hear him on the phone. I think he’s talking to Elijah.”

She can’t see the vamp but she knows that the mirth in his voice is much too extensive considering what they are about to do. Oh well. She raises a hand— she can’t speak with the blonde who’s now on their street hearing— signalling for him to get into place—

—and for him to dump the bucket of corn syrup, red dye number five, and just enough of her blood to make it smell real all over her body.

It goes on warm and sticky, scarily similar to actual blood, drenching the t-shirt she has decided to sacrifice. It’s for a good cause, she has to remind herself. Her skin itches where the mixture clings to her and she has to keep from giggling, her shoulders shaking. This had better work.

Kol’s boot nudges against her butt, tsking as she swallows another giggle. “Get with it darling— he’s almost here.”

She nods, splaying her limbs out in a way she imagines a dead— or almost dead— body would look. She doesn’t have to imagine too hard.

“Good job,” Kol whispers. “Billy Loomis would be proud.”

She smiles quickly at the reference— part of her plan was making him watch Scream with her.

“He’s here— let’s do this—“

The end of his sentence is cut off by a yell— his yell. They have to cover the sound of her heartbeat somehow. She can only keep her heart so steady and she’s not trying to give herself away before the fun has really begun. Thank heaven Kol has a good pair of lungs— and that he doesn’t need to breathe.

“Yeah I just go ba— Kol?” Like with Kol, she can’t see Klaus but she can hear him and the way his voice falters in confusion.

“Brother—” the way Kol’s voice hitches at the end of the word makes her almost break character. Someone sign this man up for an Oscar immediately— “I don’t know what happened. I left to get some of that ice cream she’s always talking about and— and—”

Klaus doesn’t speak but over Kol’s scarily astute acting she can hear commotion on the other end of his cellphone. Elijah— jackpot.

A double prank.

“Elijah give me a minute— Kol, what happened?”

Klaus’ heavy boots thunk against the concrete, the vibrations radiating through her cheek where it presses against the ground. His steps are almost as thundering as his voice, both echoing through the open space.

Kol plays along with his brother’s anger, matching it with his own. “I just said I don’t know!”

“What do you mean you don’t know! Look at her and tell me what you see—” his words stop, the air punctuated by a loud crack, no doubt the sound of his Iphone shattering into a hundred pieces.

Oops.

Suddenly there are hands on her back, nudging her softly, pulling at the sticky fabric of her t-shirt. You’re going to have to do better than that to wake the dead, babe. His hands get steadily more frantic— and more slimy— dragging the blood concoction into her hair as he checks her scalp and neck for injury. She holds her breath as his hand wraps around her jaw, lifting her face gently.

“Fuck, Kol, why is she bleeding so much?”

Kol only screeches in answer— again, she almost loses it. Klaus must not like that answer very much because he curses under his breath. Well, under his breath is a relative term. She is sure the entirety of Bourbon street hears the F-bomb he drops. The word is accompanied by the sound of her shirt being ripped in two. Here we go.

She feels a whoosh of air against her now revealed skin, steeling against the shiver that creeps up her spine at the cold air. Soon there is another pair of hands on her, sliding down her slick arms. She can picture the dyed corn syrup staining Elijah's dress shirt and the glare in his dark eyes when he realizes she has teamed up with his brother to wreak mayhem.

“What’s going on? What happened?” His sultry voice is worse than the cold air— and much harder to stave off.

“I don’t know—” both Klaus and Kol speak in unison, Klaus taking over for the both of them— “but there isn’t time to find out right now.”

Before she has time to process his words her body is being flipped over, her back pressing into the icy, sticky concrete. It takes all of her strength not to squeal at the contact. She hears a noise much too juicy for her liking before a warm artery is pressed against the seam of her lips. Perfect!

“C’mon love, please—”

When her mouth fills with a thick, metallic substance she breaks, springing forward and coughing wildly, making sure to swallow a good amount before hacking the rest up. She runs an arm across her eyelids, trying to unstick them but only managing to coat her eyelashes even more.

When she finally manages to peel her eyes open, spitting the last of Klaus’ blood out of her mouth, she is met with the faces of two shocked vampires and one vampire who is laughing his ass off. Kol’s laughter is infectious— especially because she’s been holding back giggles since the start of their ruse— and soon she is joining him, laughing so hard she falls backwards again into the goo.

For a moment there is silence— only the sound of her and Kol’s laughter— before it gives way to Klaus’ deathly calm voice. “What the hell is going on here?”

She pushes herself up on an elbow, flashing him a scarlet drenched smile— she would give anything to see her crimson teeth right now. She runs her tongue over them to enhance the point.

“Did I scare you?”

His eyes flash with black. “Did you scare me—”

“Yes, you scared us!” Elijah’s red hands wrap around her forearms, hauling her into his chest without a care for his white shirt. “May I ask why?”

Elijah’s chest shudders, his arms curling around her waist. He wasn’t lying— he’s terrified. He smells like cooking oil and metal but she doesn’t care— he’s too warm for her to mind. His lips press against her forehead and she almost feels bad.

Almost.

A hand wraps around her hair from behind, yanking her back from his brother’s chest. “What Elijah means to say is can we demand why? Why you would try something like that?”

She dips her head further back, squinting up at the furious blonde. “Oh you already know why, love.”

He rolls his eyes, his jaw clenched but leaning down to brush his cheek against hers regardless. “Indulge me anyway.”

She tilts her head, skimming her tacky lips against his stubble. “To make a point.”

“Oh yeah? And what point might that be?”

“That I am fragile—” she pulls upright, turning in Elijah’s arms and dropping the cheshire grin— “that you can’t protect me all the time—” she pushes forward, crawling onto Klaus’ drenched lap— “that I need to be like you.”

He sighs, his forehead dropping against hers, his hands curling around her jaw. “This again?”

Her arms hook around his neck, fingers tangling in his blonde hair. “You know I’m right.”

Klaus’ shoulders slump, his golden eyebrows knitting together. “Does it have to be right now?”

“Your blood is already in my system.”

“You’re going to be the death of me, you know that?”

She smiles back at him, leaning in for what she hopes is one last human kiss. “Shouldn’t I be the one saying that?”

He only sighs, shaking his head as Kol laces his fingers with hers. She turns to the brown eyed vamp just in time to see him pass her a mischievous wink.

It is the last thing she sees before the world around her goes dark.

** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **

She wakes feeling significantly less sticky than she had when she blacked out— and significantly more hungry. She can’t remember the last time her throat was dry like this. Is she catching a cold? She shifts slightly, her elbow piling into a pillow underneath her. The pillow grunts.

Not a pillow.

Kol rises beside her, pressing a hand to her chest until she falls back against the mattress and then rolling on top of her, sinking his face against her neck. The words he mumbles into her skin make her dead heart stop in the best way.

“I told you that plan would get you killed.”

[pretend-writer]

Kids Of The Future (Chapter 6)

Mini-Series

Summary: After time traveling from the apocalypse in 2019, a surprise waits for Diego and Y/N as they arrive at Dallas, Texas circa 1960.

Pairing: Hargreeves x sibling!reader, Diego Hargreeves x reader

Word Count: 3.9k words

Warning: mention of violence, mention of death, gruesome violence, swearing

✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤

- Y/N's POV -

Five had left me by myself in The Handler's office, hunting for the briefcase as I read more of Belinda's files.

It was a huge mystery how she ended up in the 60s with us. She was only a baby when we found her in the alley, nothing made sense at all.

A loud creek shifted my thoughts, making me jump up. Staying in character, I spoke up thinking that it was probably someone from the commission. 'Who's there?'

'Ahh!' Diego screamed as he tackled me, 'You creep! It was you at the alley harassing my girlfriend huh? Who the hell are you exactly and what do you want with my daughter?'

'It's me, oh my- Diego, it's me!'

He seemed confused until the realization hit him; Diego's jaw dropped when he noticed that I was shape shifted into The Handler. 'Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't know this is what you were doing.'

'What are you doing here?' I turned back to my original form, slightly raising my voice at Diego. 'I told you it's just me and Five here today.'

'Sorry, I just got worried and-and I came here. I didn't meant to cause trouble.'

'But what if you got caught? We don't know what these people are capable of.'

'Well, I took the risk for you.' Diego bit his lips and shifted eye contact. 'I had to make sure you were okay.'

I sighed, frustrated but flattered at the same time that my stomach was filled with butterflies. He had called me his girlfriend, came all the way here to talk to The Handler about that night.

But I was far too focused because my baby was in danger; more importantly her history was revealed. I handed Diego the file that was in my hand, 'Read it.'

His brows furrowed, showed nothing but confusion as he saw Bel's name across the file. 'Where's this from?'

'It was in this desk. The Handler's desk.' I answered as he opened it and read throughly. 'It-it kind of answered our questions we've been wondering for the past three years.'

'This... this has got to be a mistake, right? I mean she's one of us then? But how?'

'I have no idea.' I was scared; scared as to how she got here in the first place. Scared about what was going to happen to us, to Bel. Scared that this whole thing could've been a set up and we never knew.

Diego grabbed my hand, 'This... this won't change the fact that she's still our baby.'

A small smile formed on my face, it was nice that Diego was giving me reassurance. In a way, I was glad he was here. He made me feel safe. 'Yeah. You're right.'

'You don't have to worry anymore. I'm here to protect you and Bel.' He smiled, it was weird for him to say such thing because this whole time we'd never talk to each other like that. Or in this tone, at least. He squeezed my hand, pulled me in as he wrapped his arms around me. 'You're safe with me, Y/N.'

As I smiled back at him, Five appeared out of thin air using his powers. With a briefcase in his hand, he stared at us. 'Guys, get a room.'

'We're already in a room.' Diego chuckled, 'You're the one that interrupted us.'

Five rolled his eyes, 'What the hell are you doing here anyway? This is supposed to be mine and Y/N's mission.'

'Sorry, I couldn't sit still knowing how crazy The Handler is. Didn't want anything to happen to you guys.'

'Well, we're fine. Now let's get back to the others and figure out what the hell we're going to do now.' We gathered around together closely, Five controlling the briefcase as we traveled back to our meeting spot, the Karate Gym.

Everything was fine, or at least we thought it was until we turned around and saw all our siblings tied up with one person standing around them while holding onto Bel; Lila.

'You really think you could impersonate my mother?' Lila laughed, 'Your acting sucks.'

'Stay away from Bel. Put her down.' Diego shouted.

'Ah, so that's where the cute one went. I was looking for you, Diego boy.' She grinned, 'What makes you guys think I'll give her back?'

'Give me my baby back, now. Or I swear I'll do harm to you far more worse than you can imagine.'

Lila raised her eyebrows, 'I'm not scared of you. What, you're going to morph into Frankenstein or something?'

'Ha, I wouldn't test it if I were you. She's pranked us with things scarier than that.' Klaus laughed softly.

'You see Lila, my power is such a great thing because you know why? I can turn into anything I've seen and I've read many books as a child. Many.'

Lila laughed, 'You guys are such idiots. I thought it was just Five but seems like it runs in the family.'

'Watch your mouth!' Five yelled at her.

'You Hargreeves aren't the only ones that have super powers, you know that right?'

The cheeky grin made me want to just punch her in her smug face. 'We already know Bel has powers. We went through The Handler's fil-'

'I'm not talking about her.' She flashed a smile as she stepped closer to Diego and I. 'Diego, I heard a rumor...'

Diego's eyes flashed glassy grayish white, completely freezing into place. My mind immediately was out of focus, noticing that somehow, Lila had Allison's powers. But I didn't have time to think, I had to get her before she got into his head then try to get Bel back also.

My eyes met with Five, knowing exactly what we needed to do. He disappeared into thin air, appearing back next to Lila as he quickly grabbed onto Bel.

Lila was distracted, not realizing I shifted into Luther as I used the strength to pull her up the floor.

'You can take their powers too?' Lila smirked, holding onto my hand as she tried to grasp for air. 'Thought it was solely just for design.'

'Why are you surprised? I'm a shape shifter, I told you I can turn into anything.' I threw her to the ground then shifted into Vanya, using my force field to try to hurt Lila. While my surrounding turned blue as my energy started to build up, Lila kicked me hard into the mats.

A scream came from the other side of the room as Diego charged towards Lila, throwing knives at her when she tried to get up. As he tackled her down, I grabbed one of his knives and held it only a centimeter away from Lila's neck.

'What do you want with Bel?' I yelled as I shifted back to myself again. 'And don't fucking lie to me.'

'I don't know, this was all mom's plan. Even if I did know, I wouldn't fucking tell you.' Lila giggled devilishly.

This time, I stuck the cold knife onto her skin, letting her bleed lightly to scare her but not hard enough to where she's severely injured. 'I appreciate you playing this "I'm a bad girl" act, but cut the shit or I'll really hurt you.'

'You wouldn't dare.'

I raised my brows at her as she tested my patience. It had been a while since I've "investigated" anyone but the thrill and the adrenaline just took over my body. It didn't help the fact that this girl was a part of taking my baby away from me.

As I took her hand off the floor, I snatched her index finger and this time, pushed the knife right under her finger nail. 'I'm not playing around, do you believe me now or should I keep going?'

Lila was terrified, breathing heavily as she shook her head. 'S-sorry.'

Five kneeled next to me, joining in on the conversation to try to get information out of her. 'So how did Bel end up here in the 60s?'

She rolled her eyes. 'You really are a kid aren't you? Story time is-'

I interrupted her as I pushed down the knife that Diego struck into her arm earlier. Screaming in pain while the knife dug deeper into her skin, I got closer to her face.

'Okay, okay. Don't mess with you or your brother, I get it now.' She said before I let go of the knife. 'Who are you people?'

'Couple of old roommates that had to play house with an old man that never gave a shit about us.' A fake smile formed on my face. 'That geezer taught us a lot of stuff, taught me how to interrogate people at the age of six. Sounds great right?'

She laughed, 'We would've been great friends.'

'I'd rather have my eyeball chewed off by a wolf.'

Five groaned, 'Will you guys shut up and let me know how this baby ended up here please?'

Diego chuckled, 'Oh no. Keep going. It's hot watching Y/N getting riled up.'

Klaus gagged from behind. 'We're only tied up you know? We can still hear.'

Lila sighed, probably fed up with the Hargreeves shenanigans that she had to deal with. 'Anyways, she was several months old when she started to discover her powers, poor baby couldn't control such powerful thing. Her ecokinesis energy collided with the lightning that was flashing that night, aligned with your timeline as you were traveling back in time. Then boom, alley. Crazy huh?'

'That is actually fascinating.' Diego nudged Five's shoulder as he nodded, interested in the story. 'What? Don't tell me you're not surprised as I am how that worked. That means lightning can somehow boost time traveling. Maybe that's why we're stuck here.'

'Or you just suck at time traveling.' Allison added.

I looked at Lila and smiled. 'So what do you say? You let us go and never ever see us again.'

'That's cute of you, really but I can't let you do that.'

Five cracked his neck and his fingers as he looked at me and Diego, 'Guys move out the way.'

Diego asked, raising his eyebrows as he was a bit scared of what might happen. 'Uhm why?'

'Just go untie them, please. I'll handle Lila.'

'Handle? What are you going to do to me?' She replied back as Five pulled out some weird item from his blazer. In a second, he made Lila shut up which I was thankful for. On the other hand, I was a little scared since I didn't know what the hell he did. Hopefully, it was a tranquilizer.

Making sure that Lila was no longer conscious, Diego and I walked over to our siblings. As I reached over behind Allison to untie her, she cocked her head. 'Ah. Well, Five left with that girl.'

'Can we please talk about the weird  but sort of cool transformation that Y/N did?' Klaus added as Diego helped him untie the rope. 'You turning into Luth-'

'Yeah, no let's not mention it.' Diego shook his head, 'Y/N don't ever do that again.'

Luther gasped. 'Hey! Honestly, I thought it was awesome.'

I laughed as I stood behind Luther after I was done with Allison, fiddling with the knot on his wrist. 'I mean, it worked right? I needed the strength and Luther was the first person I thought about.'

'Why couldn't you be like Hulk or Wonder Woman?' Diego complained, untying Klaus from the ropes from his wrist.

Just as I finished untying Luther, I heard the voice. Her voice.

'Majority of the Hargreeves in one room, very impressive.'

'Yup, did it all by myself. Are you proud or what?' I implied as I popped up from behind Luther, quickly shifting to Lila. 'Couldn't find Five or Y/N but asked the commission to keep an eye on them while I'm here.'

The Handler smiled, 'Good work. So tell me why everyone's untied except for Luther and Vanya?'

With Luther's hands still behind his back, he played along and kept his hands as if it were still tied. Vanya was still tied up from when Lila captured her, since Diego and I didn't have the chance to untie her yet.

Klaus, Allison and Diego on the other hand, stood still and stared at me. Thinking of some random excuse, I went along with the first one I could think of. 'I've rumored them to stay like that and to keep their mouth shut. They're harmless now.'

'Brilliant. Wow, Lila. You're more ready than I thought you were.' She walked over to me then "booped" my nose.

Oh, what I'd do to wipe the strong perfume off my nose. I just kept on talking to The Handler, hoping that it would distract me from the smell. 'So what should we do with this baby?'

'I'll take care of it. Raise it like I raised you, make it a warrior and hopefully become a powerful part of the commission.'

'She.' I corrected her. 'The baby is not a thing.'

The Handler chuckled, putting her briefcase down as she walked closer to me. 'Does it matter? Don't tell me you're attached to.. "her". Are you?'

'No, mom. Just wondering if you ever thought of me like you do this baby.' I was a bit proud of myself, thinking of a scenario and keeping Lila's accent as I fooled this woman.

'Oh, no darling. I could never.' She stood close to me, caressing my cheek and smiled at me. 'You will always be my one and only daughter. Always making me proud.'

'So you don't mind us taking Bel back then?' Allison stood behind her and smiled, knowing that she took The Handler by surprise.

Luther walked over next to Allison, grabbing The Handler's briefcase off the floor. 'Excuse me while I take this off your hand. You won't be needing this anymore.'

The woman's brows raised, confusion rushing through her brains as the rest of my siblings except for Vanya started roaming free. 'H-how did you guys-'

'Ha, it's just me behind my powers.' I revealed myself in front of The Handler, watching her jaw drop. 'My accent was pretty good wasn't it?'

'Way better than The Handler performance, to be honest.' Five popped out of nowhere, smiling and waving at the woman. 'Long time, no see granny. Did you miss me?'

Vanya stood up as Klaus helped her with the rope. 'Uh Five? What did you do to Lila?'

'I figured out that she can manipulate people's powers so I had to improvise.' Five grinned, 'Used my briefcase, zapped us to a time where she won't be able to survive. Now I'm back here.'

Luther stared at him, 'Wow. You're fucking evil.'

'Thank you, how kind of you.'

'You bring my daughter back right now!' The Handler stomped on the floor.

Diego gasped, 'Hey! You're going to ruin our mats. It cost us a fortune building this gym.'

'You only want your daughter back because you have no power when she's gone, right? Just like how you want Bel for her powers.' Five took a step towards her. 'You can't control and manipulate them anymore.'

'Letting you choose the easy way or the hard way.' I watched her squirm, looking around the room for a way to escape or perhaps a weapon that can hurt us.

Klaus smiled, 'There's no way out of here.'

The Handler huffed. 'The commission will come and hunt you forever if you kill me.'

'They already don't like you.' Five laughed, 'We'd be doing them a favor. And you know it.'

She slowly backed away from us, knowing this was the end for her. I would've felt bad about all of this but knowing that she only wanted to use Bel for her "personal project" and seeing how manipulative she was towards Lila, I didn't feel any remorse at all.

'This won't hurt. Maybe.' Five smiled as he inched closer to The Handler.

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

- Diego's POV -

Our gym was a wreck. I guess it didn't matter though because we were about to go back to our own timeline, leaving everything we've ever had here. It sucked that we had to leave this place that we called home for the past three years, it was even worse that it got turned into a crime scene all because of this woman that couldn't mind her own business.

I was always for beating the back guys and punishment but seeing how this turn out made my stomach turn a little. It had been a while since we did something as gross as this; not since we all left dad's mansion. But Five mentioned that a bullet through her brain wouldn't even stop her, so I guess this was necessary to stop her once and for all.

At the end of all of this, Bel, Y/N and the rest of the family was alright. That's what mattered.

'Wow, damn.' Luther spoke in awe as he looked around the room. 'This place is... uhm... I'm so sorry guys.'

'It's okay.' Y/N let out a soft laugh, 'Like Five said, we don't belong in this timeline. Nothing here will matter anymore once we go back.'

Allison took a deep breath, trying to catch up her breathing after long, hard work. 'Still, Y/N. This was yours and Diego's home.'

'Honestly I'm more worried about Bel watching us do what we just did.' I looked over at her, realizing that she had fallen asleep in the corner of the gym. 'Oh, well I guess I don't have to worry.'

Klaus got up from the mat, 'So you guys ready to go back home? I know I am.'

'Hold on, there's something I need to do before we go back.' Y/N said, then looked over at Five. 'Do you mind helping me with something?'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

The seven of us stood behind a bush, in front of a nice, suburban house after Five zapped us here with a briefcase. Five and Y/N haven't told us where we were yet, guessing that they didn't want to share whatever they were whispering to each other. Luther questioned them, 'Where are we?'

Both of them ignored him, continuing to mumble amongst each other. Y/N seemed sad, as if she was about to cry. I wanted to comfort her but decided to wait until she reached out to me.

Vanya nudged my side, grabbing my attention and looking at me then back to Y/N. 'You know what's going on?'

I shook my head in response as I was confused as she was. Continuing to watch over Y/N, she finally looked over at me and motioned me to come. With Bel in her arms, she held her tight and kissed her forehead. 'Everything okay, Y/N?'

She stared into my eyes, tears streaming down as she nodded slowly. 'You see the two couples inside the house? That's Bel's parents.'

My eyes fell to our baby, then back to her. Hoping that it didn't mean what I thought she meant, I clarified. 'We're not in the 60s anymore, are we?'

Y/N bit her lip and shook her head. 'Five took us forward in time. This is the year we'd turn three years old, where Bel would turn three too.'

'Wait so-' My mind was all over the place, I wasn't prepared for this at all. 'What are you trying to say?'

'You know Diego, you know.' She sniffled, 'Please don't make me say it.'

Y/N cried on my shoulders as I hugged her and Bel tightly, heartbroken that it had to be this way.

I didn't know what I expected when we took her in. I've never thought of the days where we would finally see the rest of the Hargreeves, or getting the briefcase to go back to where we came from. I didn't even imagine the days where Y/N and I would grow old together, raising Bel peacefully as we start our lives in the 60s. I just simply took it day by day, enjoying every single moment with the two girls that I loved so much.

But everything was different now, so different that I didn't expect any of this. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to Bel, I couldn't imagine being back to a "normal" life because my norm was being with her. I knew, however, that this was the right thing to do and I was sure Y/N knew that too. This must've been a tough decision that she had to make, I stood next to her and supported her choice even if it hurt so much.

'Don't cry, mama.' Bel giggled, touching Y/N's cheek and wiping away her tears.

A laugh escaped her mouth, smiling as she kissed the top of Bel's head. 'I'm sorry kiddo. I-I just love you so much.'

'I love you, Bel. More than you could ever know.' Belinda smiled at me as I said those words to her, grabbing me on my nose.

Y/N exhaled, 'You ready, Diego?'

'Yeah.' I said hesitantly, gazing at Bel for the one last time before Allison took her in her arms. 'You're going to say bye too?'

'Something like that.' Allison walked to the front door, guessing that she needed space from me and Y/N.

She mumbled words to Bel, making her eyes turn grayish white for a few seconds before it turned back to normal color. Y/N saw my facial expression change, holding onto my hand as she comforted me. 'It's for the best, Diego.'

Allison knocked on the door then left Bel on the front porch before she joined us back behind the bushes. The couple came out, gasping in surprise as they reunited with their baby once again.

'She's back with her family. It wouldn't have been fair for her to remember everything, you know? A normal life is what we want for her, right?'

I hugged Y/N and kissed her on the cheek as she wrapped her arms around me. We've loved Bel as if she was our own, took care of her for the last three years of our lives. Knowing how much Y/N loved her, it must of been hard to let her go. 'I love you, Y/N. I love you so much.'

'Aw, that is so cute. I love you all. I actually loved that little goofball too.' Klaus joined in on the hug, ruining my not-so-romantic moment with Y/N, although I wasn't slightly upset about it because Klaus was just Klaus.

Luther chuckled, 'Look at us being a family again.'

'Again? We were never a family to begin with.' Five cackled. 'This will be a start of something new, maybe. If you guys won't piss me off, that is.'

'That is the cutest and the kindest thing that's ever came out of your mouth, Five.' Allison grinned.

Five rolled his eyes. 'Ugh, never mind then. Let's just go home.'

'Okay, okay. Quick question though before we have this wonderful and fun time traveling back to 2019.' Klaus beamed, ear from ear. 'So when you turned into Luther, did you turn into Luther? You know, like your body everywhere?'

I hit him on his stomach, grossed out by the imagine in my head. 'Klaus, I swear I will leave you here in the 90s.'

'Actually, that doesn't sound too bad.' Klaus hummed.

[twoidiotwriters1]

Family (Five Hargreeves x Fem! Reader)

A/N: Hi, it's time for a ... Five Fiction, lol. Danny didn't appreciate my joke, but ok. Again this is a one shot, it's just me wanting to share my ideas, I hope you like it. - Val

Important announcement: We still have spots for you to request!

Another important thing: In this one shot, Five’s 19 years old and not 13  like in the series... 

Aaaaaand this is from season 2.

Words: 1,334

From the office of Sir Reginald Hargreeves,

To my Pursuers:

I, Reginald Hargreeves, request the pleasure of your company for a light supper on the 20th of November, 1963, at half past seven o'clock.

"Okay, we'll go," says Luther getting up from a chair.

At first, Luther didn’t want to go, but a little speech from Diego convinces him. Together with Vanya and I, we walked towards the stairs of Elliott's little apartment. Luther turns to look at me and stops me with his arm.

"Uh, what are you doing?"

I look up at him. "You just said we'll go, come on, we don't want to piss off Daddy Hargreeves!" I take another step, but again, Luther stops me.

“Y/N, I don't think you can go," he says looking at his siblings.

"Why not?"

“You're not part of the family, our father will get confused with all the info, your presence will worsen all.”

“Excuse me?" I say offended.

"What Luther is trying to say,” says Diego, approaching. "Is that, we know who we are dealing with, he’s not the best person.”

"I know that, you’ve told me repeatedly,” I roll my eyes. "Stop whining, all of you seven have powers, I'll be fine.”

"Yes, I thought that too and ended up stabbed,” he growls, “Listen, I just think it’d be dangerous,” he says unsure.

"We've been through worse things," I cross my arms.

“It's different.”

"I don't see a problem with Y/N being with us,” adds Vanya.

"Thank you!”

"Vanya has amnesia, it doesn't count," says Luther.

"What?" She complains.

"Anyway, Y/N you can't come, it’s not right.”

"Oh please, Luther, look around you, none of this is right," I complain.

He looks at me and makes a face.

"Don't make me do something that I might regret.”

“Luther," says Diego, but his brother ignores him.

"What are you planning to do, Ape brain?"

A very bad phrase towards a man with super strength to someone who has no powers. Suddenly Luther takes me by the waist and puts me on his shoulder. I try to avoid it by kicking and screaming, but obviously nothing works.

"Put me down!"

Luther takes me to the roof of Elliott's store where he has all his photography equipment, drops me to the ground and takes my arm and then handcuffs me -I did not know where those came from, and I do not want to know- one of my wrists, to a building’s pipe.

"You got to be kidding!" I screech trying to break free.

"It's for your own good," he says and returns to the building.

"Luther!" I shout. "Diego!" I wait for a few seconds without receiving an answer. "Son of a bitch…” I whisper leaning my head against the pipes.

Truth be told, this doesn't surprise me on Luther's part, but at least I thought Diego would do something.

“I'll avenge myself.”

***

While Y/N prepares her revenge on the roof, the other Hargreeves head towards the place where their father indicated.

The first to arrive is Five, who walks to the elevator and presses the correct button, but when the doors begin to close, Diego stops them. Little by little, the others arrive, but Five frowns when he does not see the girl.

“Where’s Y/N?" He asks, looking at his brothers.

"Tell him, Luther,” Diego mentions reproachfully.

"Tell me what?" says Five. "What the fuck did you do?"

"Not now, Five,” answers Luther and the elevator doors open, Five uses his powers to confront Luther.

"Tell me exactly what happened if you don't want me to use your ape hand to make a keychain.”

***

"I'm not one of the family…” I whisper through my teeth. "Stupid Luther, if it weren't for me, he'd be in a circus."

"Just when I thought you were the sane one of the team…"

I jump when I hear another voice. I turn to find Five walking towards me with his hands in his pockets.

"If you just come to tease, I'll throw you off the roof.”

"I don't think you can do much handcuffed to the pipes," He says, sitting next to me. I sigh.

We’re silent for a few seconds until Luther's words return to my mind. I look at the boy.

"Do you think I'm not part of the family?" I ask.

"You're not," He says shortly and I nod, looking down.

At this point I'm used to Five's cutting and sarcastic comments, most of the time I talk back, but what he says is true, I can't deny it and I hate that.

“I just wanted to go with them. I know that your father is something delicate and I know that he was a horrible person who did a lot of harm. I thought that, just being there as moral support, I could help somehow…”

He laughs at my words.

"Dinner would have ended very differently if you had…”

I frown.

"What happened?"

“We showed him our powers, he asked questions. Luther finally rebelled against him after being his puppet for years, Diego was traumatized by constructive criticism, Klaus acted weirder than usual, Vanya exploded the fruit, Allison used the rumor again and I- Well, I thought he could help me, but I'm still clueless.”

I analyze everything he tells me and it may sound strange, but I’m no longer surprised by the Hargreeves family reunions.

“Wow…”

“Yep," He turns to see me. "Let me help you with that…” he says lifting the handcuffs, he gets up and opens them.

I stroke my wrist as I get up.

"Come on, I've got a revenge on Luther waiting for me…” I walk up the stairs. "Diego also deserves it, he didn't do shit to help me.”

“Y/N?"

I stop and turn to see him a few feet away.

"Yes?"

"You may not be part of the family," He looks away. “But I think you are the most important person in the group."

I’m surprised at his words. Five is the least to express any feeling other than anger.

"You think?" I ask with a smile.

"Without you, we would be lost," he says, smiling a bit dryly.

"Awww, you're so sweet, Five!" He rolls his eyes and I laugh. I open my arms and nod, ”Come here…”

“Y/N,” Five complains, but I wrap him in a hug. He sighs and not long after I feel his arms on my waist, his body relaxes.

"It's just a hug, grumpy," I say over his growling. "Thank you…” I whisper as I step away, putting my hands on his shoulders. I smile and then kiss his cheek.

"Aw! Guys come here!” Klaus's voice makes us jump apart. The others follow him closely. "Luther, how can you say that she’s not in this family? She’s getting closer to being an actual sister!” He says pointing at us.

"What!?" I feel my cheeks burn and the others laugh.

"Ben says he hears wedding bells," Klaus adds, clapping his hands.

"Shut up, Klaus!" The boy and I say at the same time. I may be embarrassed right now, but I can't help but smile a little.

"Maybe I was wrong before,” says Luther and my smile disappears completely.

"Oh I'm going to show you how wrong you can be…”

"I don't like that look," Luther backs up a bit and then goes downstairs.

I laugh at his action, it’s not the first time that I carry out a promise, so I follow his steps without hurrying. When we get to the apartment, the others scatter around the place while I rejoice in Luther's agony trying to apologize.

"Who would say that such a small girl can scare someone like Luther?" Allison scoffs, then walks into the kitchen.

Then a blue light flashes behind me.

“That’s my girl…” Five whispers close to my ear and then teleports back to another location.

I feel my face burning again and I grin like an idiot, but that can wait for now.

[klarolinelibrary]

Hi KC Readers,

After a long break, we are back with our weekly releases! We apologize for the delay but we have reached the end of the week which means we have new weekly releases for you! The stories below were updated during the week of May 22nd - May 28th.

Happy Reading!

FanFiction.Net

Something Like Love (Chapter 8)

Author: Recklessnesspersonified

Rating: M

Length: 20,346

Summary: Klaus Mikaelson was a bad boy, the quintessential jock or so Caroline Forbes had thought until one night their paths cross in the school hallways. He was different, intense and she was falling for him, but soon she finds out it was all a sham. Will she forgive him or would they break up before they confess their true love? AU/AH

Date of update: May 23 2021

Klaus POV - The Trouble with Spells (Chapter 26)

Author: ilovetf

Rating: M

Length: 105,863

Summary: I think the title is self explanatory. The Trouble with Spells as seen through Klaus's eyes and his POV. Over the years, people kept liking this story and some even asked for Klaus POV, so I decided to give it a try. Hope you enjoy it. All feedback is more than welcome. Good or bad.

Date of update: May 23 2021

High Stakes

Author: stardancer10

Rating: M

Length: 4,105

Summary: When Klaus died something in Caroline broke. She could not take anymore of Mystic Falls and she left. In her travels she finds herself doing things that she knew others wouldn't agree with, but she did what she felt was right. It was a gamble she was willing to take, something she felt that she owed him.

Date of update: May 23 2021

Purgatory (Chapter 22)

Author: Scarletborn

Rating: M

Length: 333,312

Summary: Caroline Forbes always thought that evil creatures and demons belonged to Hell. What she did not know was that vampires belonged to Purgatory. A place worse than hell where the only thing that mattered was survival. A place where enemies turned into allies and foes into friends. [Klaus/Caroline AU story set mostly in New Orleans]

Date of update: May 24 2021

The Wolf II (Chapter 11)

Author: yokan87

Rating: T

Length: 4,718

Summary: The Guerreras' threat still looms over the Mikaelson house as Caroline tries to adapt to life as a vampire, away from her daughter. But an unexpected family reunion makes everything worse, taking away the little peace Klaus, Caroline and Elijah managed to find after the war that nearly broke them. [It's TO S2, but Caroline was a witch, had Klaus' baby and now she's a vampire]

Date of update: May 26 2021

Vampires suck (Chapter 4)

Author: Miss.Mystic.Falls

Rating: T

Length: 5,583

Summary: What would happen if Caroline knew about vampires way before the Salvatore brothers come to Mystic Falls.

Date of update: May 28 2021

Archive of Our Own

No Reservations (Chapter 3)

Author:  PumpkinDoodles

Rating: M

Length: 6,890

Summary: Caroline Forbes is having a tiny crisis: her restaurant partner and co-chef has disappeared again and isn't returning her calls. Caroline cannot function without Stefan. Her kitchen staff starts making jokes about getting her meds for irritability and she takes out her issues on helpless chicken breasts. It's not fun on a good day. But when tragedy strikes, Caroline's forced to work with a new chef. She doesn't remember meeting him in New Orleans--but Klaus Mikaelson remembers her.

Date of update: May 22 2021

Sibling Rivalry Redux - Adventures in Polyamory (Chapter 3)

Author: kcatdino

Rating: M

Length: 4,105

Summary: In which Klaus and Rebekah are both bi, their taste in men and women overlaps infuriatingly often, and they argue over their newest shared interest. In which Caroline feels like she might be a sugar baby, but no one’s dating her and she hasn’t gotten any in so long. Like, basically since meeting her new best friends, Klaus and Rebekah. Weird, right?

Date of update: May 22 2021

Darkness Becomes Thee (Chapter 6)

Author: BelleMorte180

Rating: E

Length: 32,424

Summary: Austria 1300s When Klaus met a young girl on a riverbank, he knew that he would one day come back for her. When he looked into her bright blue eyes, he could see a reflection of his own soul, a darkness that lingered inside both of them. When the young girl turned into a beautiful woman with a thirst for blood, his fascination with her turns into obsession. He wants not only her loyalty but her eternity, a possessiveness that is equally returned. or my "Caroline is the serial killer Elizabeth Bathory" au.

Date of update: May 23 2021

The Big Bad Wolf (Chapter 9)

Author: MorningStarGirl666

Rating: M

Length: 66,087

Summary: He was the Big, Bad Wolf of this story, there was no doubt about that. But Caroline? She was the light to his darkness, the moon that shone brighter than even the stars in a sky of endless void. Like every wolf, he fell in love with the moon, and every month, he was destined to cry for a love he would never touch.

Date of update: May 23 2021

Klaus vs the Soulmate Goose

Author: kcatdino

Rating: T

Length: 2,129

Summary: Klaus has met his match in the form of a goose as immortal and obstinate as he is: The Soulmate Goose of Enforcement. Will he succeed in killing the magical creature or will it force him to accept what’s in his heart?

Date of update: May 23 2021

Louder Than Thunder (Chapter 28)

Author: khaleesiofthewolves

Rating: M

Length: 179,641

Summary: All Hell was about to break loose. After dying while protecting a grieving Klaus, Caroline finds herself sent back in time, and she's not who she once was. She's more. Back in Mystic Falls, something else is stirring. After the arrival of a mysterious figure from Klaus' past, it all comes to a head. It really is louder than thunder.

Date of update: May 24 2021

We are young (Chapter 17)

Author: kcatdino

Rating: T

Length: 20,572

Summary: Basically, Klaroline flirt in front of their kids who they are barely older than, and Landon is appropriately confused. Edit: Now a series of one-shots! Edit 2: Oh my god, this has plot now!

Date of update: May 24 2021

Our Time Now (Chapter 4)

Author: perfectpro

Rating: M

Length: 52,838

Summary: Caroline is going to spend her senior year getting into the law school of her choice, leading the cheerleading squad to a nationals title, and passing her sorority presidency to someone who will continue a legacy of excellence. She doesn't have time to figure out what's happening with her relationship with Klaus - not that it's much of a relationship to begin with.

Date of update: May 24 2021

I See Dead Cheerleaders (Chapter 4)

Author: PumpkinDoodles

Rating: M

Length: 7,865

Summary: When Caroline saves Jenna from Klaus's sacrifice ritual and is killed instead, she vows to haunt Klaus Mikaelson forever. Never underestimate the determination of Miss Mystic Falls.

Date of update: May 25 2021

Finding Out the Truth in a Year or Even in a Century

Author: klarolineshipperxoxo

Rating: G

Length: 1,348

Summary: Caroline goes with Stefan to New Orleans in search of Klaus 18 years after the events of TVD 5x22 and TO 1x22 but things don't go as planned and buried feelings are unearthed.

Date of update: May 25 2021

Klaroline Returns (Chapter 2)

Author: kcatdino

Rating: T

Length: 8,010

Summary: The savior of Gotham, Catwoman, is Caroline Forbes, flighty heiress by day. But what happens when her worlds collide in the form of reporter Klaus Mikaelson and her worst supervillain, The Hybrid?

Date of update: May 25 2021

witchy business (Chapter 4)

Author: MaddestMaid3n

Rating: M

Length: 13,783

Summary: "A little birdie told me you might have a book or two that might pique my interest,” “Well, that depends on your interests," Caroline's just trying to survive Marcel's New Orleans. Colluding with an Original was so not on her to-do list.

Date of update: May 25 2021

Klaus’ Thousand Year Plan to be Her Last (Chapter 3)

Author: anncatherine

Rating: T

Length: 4,022

Summary: So these are some missing Klaroline scenes from my Elena/Elijah soulmate fic that I couldn’t include because they either didn’t fit or needed to be form Klaus or Caroline’s pov. I think it would be helpful to read at least the first couple chapters of that for background, but basically at twelve people’s soulmate’s birthday shows up on their wrist.

Date of update: May 26 2021

what a wave you have made

Author: sekretny

Rating: T

Length: 3,413

Summary: “Do you really hate me this much?” She shouts in frustration. Klaus looks her in the eye, their gazes locked in a battle of fiery tempers. “Hate you…” He repeats with every ounce of venom he can muster. After ransacking the contents of his backpack, he removes a sketchbook Caroline has never seen before. He starts to flip furiously through the pages, “You have given me more than enough reasons to hate you, sweetheart,” he spits while he looks for a specific page. He finds it and turns the sketchbook around to show her. Klaus makes his feelings for Caroline visibly clear.

Date of update: May 26 2021

The Concept of Time (Chapter 3)

Author: BelleMorte180  

Rating: E

Length: 19,640

Summary: Pairs, France 1864 After learning some distressing news, Klaus seeks out the advice of a friend in the middle of the night and meets a mysterious woman who leaves him with more questions than answers. She hands him a journal filled with the mad ramblings about time by a man named Lorenzo St. John and sees a curious date tattooed on her shoulder. Klaus can think of little else after their first meeting and tracks her down at a burlesque club in the wrong part of the city. Klaus begins to wonder if he can solve the mystery of Caroline Forbes or simply be lost in what has deemed to be impossible.

Date of update: May 26 2021

Revenge of the Fifth - TVD Edition (Chapter 3)

Author: kcatdino

Rating: M

Length: 6,168

Summary: A star wars AU for vampire dairies for May the Fourth Be with You! Caroline, Bonnie, and Elena are padawan learners at Luke Skywalker’s new Jedi training academy, desperate to prove themselves by taking down some of the new Sith Lords that have popped up. The problem is, those Sith Lords are the Mikaelsons, and each girl has a Mikaelson brother obsessed with them, unwilling to let them come to harm. Will that make it harder or easier for them to triumph over the Dark Side?

Date of update: May 26 2021

Smoke Signals

Author: misssophiachase

Rating: T

Length: 3,017

Summary: "You, you must have been looking for me...sending smoke signals" Professional photographer Caroline Forbes and firefighter Klaus Mikaelson keep running into each other. It’s either the universe playing a joke on them or Katherine’s ‘accidental’ matchmaking. Or maybe it's a bit of both?

Date of update: May 27 2021

Reasons Not to Date a Mikaelson (Chapter 8)

Author: kcatdino

Rating: T

Length: 15,851

Summary: Bonnie and Caroline gain a new roommate for their freshman dorm when a vision leads them to tracking down a pregnant Hayley in the Rockies. Also, Bonnie may or may not have raised a certain dead Original instead of Jeremy and Klaus takes a job at Whitmore teaching, to be annoying. He’s very good at it. This is a season 5 rewrite where the Originals never leave for New Orleans. But you know, with comedy. And increasing angst with every chapter.

Date of update: May 27 2021

if you want me to fall (Chapter 2)

Author: FeyresUnbecoming

Rating: T

Length: 1,807

Summary: Caroline and Klaus scramble out of bed before Rebekah can find the two of them, lest she find out they've been sleeping together.

Date of update: May 27 2021

Good to you - Side Stories and Prompts

Author: originalhybridlover

Rating: T

Length: 801

Summary: So this is going to be a set a side stories or prompts related to my Klaroline story, Good to You

Date of update: May 28 2021

Genuine Beauty: Klaroline Canon-ish Drabble Collection

Author: Klauscarolove

Rating: M

Length: 30,884

Summary: Klaroline Drabble Collection: Close Canon, Canon Compliant, Canon-ish, Canon Universe....... basically if they are vampires in the drabble, it will go here.

Date of update: May 27 2021

Klaroline Storybook (Chapter 44)

Author: misssophiachase

Rating: T

Length: 63,904

Summary: A new selection of Klaroline drabbles

Date of update: May 28 2021

Lost Through Time (Chapter 7)

Author: Life_is_a_fantasy

Rating: Unavailable

Length: 4,173

Summary: What will happen when Hope, Landon, Lizzie and Josie fall through a time portal? Will they change things, even if they don't mean to? How will Klaus react to knowing his daughter has a boyfriend?

Date of update: May 28 2021

When your family is too nosy.... (Chapter 3)

Author: kcatdino

Rating: Unavailable

Length: 4,349

Summary: Klaus’s plan to get back at Rebekah by staying friends with Stefan backfires spectacularly when Stefan and Stefan’s ex-girlfriend Caroline convince him to fake a relationship at his family’s get-together at the beach. Sure, Rebekah will probably assume Caroline’s a prostitute and the rest of his family are too nosy for his own good, but what could go wrong? (I will add a rating later when I decide how explicit the smut will be)

Date of update: May 28 2021

LITTLE TENSE (Chapter 4)

Author: wincefish16

Rating: T

Length: 4,462

Summary: Klaroline's life together as they work in Mikaelson and co. Different snippets of their life. HUMAN, FULL OF FLUFF AND LITTLE BIT OF ANGST.

Date of update: May 28 2021

Like snow we melt, like rain we fall, like the sun we burn, in love. (Chapter 3)

Author: BlackRaven475932

Rating: M

Length: 4,088

Summary: after episode 5x11, Klaroline sex scene. Klaus and Caroline have a secret relationship. Teasing in public, a lot of smut, no one knows. WARNING, this story contains a blood kink in later chapters. If you don't like this then I advise you not to read it. It will occur in later chapters and I will give a warning before the chapter.

Date of update: May 28 2021

The Allure of Darkness (Chapter 2)

Author: Loveyou3000Klaroline

Rating: M

Length: 5,127

Summary: “Anything that’s worth anything is dangerous.” Or... Klaus Mikaelson is the big bad hybrid, but he is the only one who can make Caroline’s world stable. Especially after the lie of her life gets unraveled.

Date of update: May 28 2021

That Pesky Phone

Author: timetravelercat

Rating: T

Length: 1,029

Summary: "What was that?" he asked her curiously. She looked at him, embarrassed— —Wait, Caroline Forbes? Embarrassed?" Just Klaus," she answered simply, not giving him anymore details and averting her eyes. Huh, suspicious.

Date of update: May 28 2021

Ok, Cupids

Author: timetravelercat

Rating: T

Length: 795

Summary: Klaus and Caroline sign Stefan into an online dating site.

Date of update: May 28 2021

Available On Both Websites

FFN: The Traitor and the Coward (Chapter 6)

AO3: The Traitor and the Coward (Chapter 6)

Author: Uppity Bitch

Rating: M

Length: 10,677

Summary: Klaroline AU supernatural multi-chap - Original!Caroline has spent lifetimes running from her lover and his family. Despite the centuries of loneliness, she regrets nothing. Soon, she'll bring an end to this madness. Or bring the madness full circle.

Date of update: May 23 2021

FFN: What You Always Wanted

AO3: What You Always Wanted

Author: Eliliyah

Rating: M

Length: 2,646

Summary: After waiting a thousand years for her husband to break his hybrid curse, Caroline realizes Klaus neglected to mention that his next step was to build an army. Furious, she leaves him alone in Mystic Falls. Knowing there's only one way to make it up to her, Klaus shows up on her doorstep with the one person who can get him back in her good graces: their old friend, Stefan.

Date of update: May 26 2021

[phalliwellz]

A small rant on Forwood (and why I don’t like it as both a Tyler and Caroline stan.)

(Before I start I should say I very much like Tyler more than Caroline, so it honestly might show in this rant. Regardless, it’s not an attack on her character, more so how poor writing makes Caroline worse than she actually is. Anywho.) 

I legitimately cannot say one good thing about forwood. Except what @/hizziemikaelson actually made me realize was that it was Caroline’s best ship, but Tyler’s worst. Since the show likes to portray Caroline as everyone’s emotional savior, they very much knew what they were doing with getting them together. Ty was the patient, Care was the therapist. ‘Tyler has ‘anger issues’? perfect! Caroline will now be his entire rock because that’s her job and we don’t know how to write this character without EVERYONE falling in love with her in someway because we’re WEIRD!’ Like. lmao what? They made Caroline get so carried away with that shit that it turned manipulative. She subconsciously wanted him to be so dependent on her because someone wanting her for once? So unrealistic! (I say that sarcastically because it’s bullshit, but this is a forwood rant, not a Caroline rant.) and you best believe she used that to her advantage till the very end. She wanted Tyler to be nothing without her. And in the show’s eyes for a very great while, he was. Everything Ty did from s2 to s5 was ‘cause Caroline influenced it or wanted him to, unless it was related to his pack and even then he had to fight to be able to do that on his own. (Remember when she didn’t give two shits that his pack member died? (Inherently cause of Elena and Caroline wanted him to help her save her, might I add.) they made his happiness rely on her. Like I said, he was nothing without Caroline Forbes. Literally. Who swooped in when he was going through his father passing away? Caroline. Who was there when he found out his uncle died? Caroline. Who was DEFINITELY there when his mother died? Caroline. Which isn’t necessarily a TERRIBLE thing, but in this context it’s not cute/healthy, it’s dehumanizing. Because instead Tyler’s grief turns into her grief. We can only focus on Tyler if Caroline is mentioned/in the shot. It’s so fucking annoying, especially as such an extreme Tyler stan. I want to know about Tyler Lockwood, not Caroline Forbes and her werewolf boyfriend. But that’s what they did. That’s what they made forwood. They turned it into in the relationship only Caroline can excel at. He loved and cared for her and at most all she did was like his body and like the fact that he cared about her. I mentioned this before in a rant of mine but Caroline only started dating him because he actually listened to her yap all the time and showed her more attention than Matt ever did. (Without a fight atleast.) other than that, what else did they have? Vampire and werewolf, we’re to believe they despise each other and Caroline and Tyler are mystic fall’s answer to Romeo & Juliet? Fuck outta here. I know Caroline never cared about that boy because instead of actually being furious at Damon for killing him, it was, ‘He was my first love. *Conflicted but ready to get this over with frowny sad face*’ and my favorite ignorant bullshit line that she told KLAUS, ‘You were never the villain in my story.’ Oh, we know. We figured that out when you fucked him in the woods while you were supposed to love Tyler but you know, semantics :). 

It’s fucked because I could see the appeal? Like genuinely. Especially as someone who wanted THE BOTH OF THEM to be happy, it could’ve been the relationship where both of them shined, not just Tyler being Caroline’s boy toy and Caroline being propped up as ‘a soft uwu baby next to a bad boy with a mean temper and she has to calm him down all the time despite not being his registered therapist.’ They also wanted forwood to be the one good unrequited ship on the show and Caroline’s first great ship but that’s the problem, it was hers, not Tyler’s. Basically it was Caroline’s world, Tyler was simply living in it.

I feel like nothing defines forwood more than the scene where Tyler finds out Caroline slept with Klaus because everything from that is just them in a nutshell. Tyler trying to calm himself down/diffuse the situation because he doesn’t want to blow up, he knows it’ll hurt Caroline by doing so but he’s hurting, he needs an outlet. Caroline, who’s used to always being his outlet, is instantly threatened and actually doesn’t feel like she should be in the wrong for fucking Klaus, so suddenly she’s nervous and now she’s even more nervous because she can’t calm him down this time. Stefan, with his fat headed ass, instantly only sees Caroline being threatened and can’t even process being mad at her, he tries to defend Care, almost gaslighting Tyler into feeling like he’s the one that should be either apologizing or not taking it so hard. It was such a mess of a situation and such a pivotal moment I don't know how they even survived after that. It showed that forwood was so one-sided. No sex/grief scenes or declaration of love could’ve changed that. He fell in love with Caroline because she was all he had. She fell in ‘love’ with him because she was horny and needed a lap dog to heal her insecurities/wounds. No other reason. 

Personally I think they could’ve been more than what they were and could’ve been a great way to show Tyler’s development, Caroline’s development and even that julie & co. actually can make good relationships/have good writing. But unfortunately, none of those things happened except showcasing that Tyler Lockwood never mattered to anyone in the tvdu long before his death and Caroline Forbes is figuratively and literally the golden girl of tvd, despite them trying so hard to make her seem like she’s not. Tyler never stood a chance in that relationship.

[tickle-bugs]

hargreeve sibs and how they react to finding out someones ticklish? 🥺👉👈

Just for you anon. Mwah. Under the cut because this is long:

Luther

- He’s a bit awkward, as expected. Assuming he accidentally tickled his lee, he’ll probably chuckle out an apology but not really do anything right away. He has a monopoly on accidental tickles actually. 

- If he stumbles on his lee later in a more private setting, he might sneak in a poke or two in an attempt to be playful. Perhaps a full tickle or two. But he’s not really one for initiating tickle fights.

- If he finds his lee in another tickle fight, however? is there really anything wrong with him joining in? Especially if he knows some great spots? Absolutely not. 

- Luther is absolutely not above picking his lee up for tickles. Strong boy. 

Diego

- Complete 180 from Luther. Diego is mean. If he hears one (1) squeak or giggle? Run.

- Everything goes out the window--suddenly nothing is as important as finding his lee’s spots and taking full advantage of them.

- He’s mean but he’s playful, ok? King of turning little pokes and squeezes into a full-blown tickle fight within seconds. 

- He gets teasy about his lee’s sensitivity to draw away from his own (if the lee knows about it). If his lee is trying to make fun of him he just turns red and tickles more until they’re laughing too hard to tease him. 

- He loves manhandling. Rough-housing is ingrained into his very being. This means throwing his lee onto couches, throwing them over his shoulder, etc. Everyone gets endorphins, not just the lee. It’s free real estate. 

- He doesn’t often initiate random tickles, but he will always respond to provocation. Always. It’s so easy to bait him (He knows he’s being baited, by why turn down an opportunity for fun?)

Allison

- Just as mean as Diego, if not worse. Do not let her beautiful smile fool you.

- Very much an “Oh? Are you ticklish?” kind of person. But after that initial poke or squeeze, she doesn’t let it go. 

- She’s so annoying (affectionate) because one of her favorite teases is “How are you so ticklish?” and its fabled variation “Maybe if I keep tickling you, you won’t be ticklish anymore.” Mean. 

- Nails. Nails. 

- Y’know when someone tickles down your spine or drags a nail across your neck to hear you squeak? Allison. 

- She adores learning new things about a lee. If you snort or make a noise she’s never heard before, expect her to chase you down until she hears it again and figures out how to draw it out of you. 

- Oh my god, she’s so teasy. Every tease in the book is hers. She just knows how to get to the center of a lee and fluster them so badly but it’s all in good faith, which somehow makes it worse?

Klaus

- Shares the “Oh?” reaction with Allison, but often pairs it with “How cute!”

- He’ll chase the lee with sorta gentle tickles to see their reaction/how they’re feeling and stop if they seem uncomfortable. 

- Very adept at spotting a lee who likes being tickled, and while he won’t embarrass them, he’ll give them a very obvious wink like “I know. Now you know that I know. We both know ;)”

- Will deadass just. Namedrop spots. And while you’re sitting there like >:O he’ll enact a live demonstration.

Five

- His eyebrows will raise a little and you’ll literally see him catalogue the information. But he doesn’t act on it right away. He wait until his lee has forgotten that he knows and just. ruins them. Usually during stupid arguments. 

- If his lee is coherent enough to see him, they’ll see him probably at his softest. Just this amused little smile. 

- His teases are the opposite. He is so goddamn mean. He and Allison are the CEOs of teasing actually. Very much “Oh, you’re a squirmer? Is this a bad spot? Good to know.”

Ben

- Surprisingly (to everyone but Klaus) mean! He’s super perceptive and matter-of-fact, and sometimes that’s worse than being creative and flowery a-la-Allison. 

- Ben’s reaction to someone’s ticklishness varies on how annoying they are to him. If they’re a pest? He’s so mean about it. If they’re nice? more light-hearted “Aww, this is adorable.”

- No but hes so mischevious actually? Only Klaus can see him so he abuses the whole being invisible thing so much. Whispering in ears, tickles that start gentle and turn evil, little squeezes that make the person jump, etc. 

- Overall he’s not super intense because like. He gets picked on so much for his sensitivity that he’s kinda learned not to start fights that he can’t finish (and Klaus is an asshole who’ll rat him out for amusement)

Vanya

- Beloved <3

- Not the most persistent ler on the planet tbh. She’d probably laugh softly and poke the person a few times, but she’s not doing anything dramatic tbh.

- If there’s some kind of group tickle fight going on, she may throw her hat in the ring, but she’s more likely to sneak a few squeezes in passing and flee. 

[justatiredghost]

The Cost Ch4

Based on this idea by @serikyl, in which Klaus is able to bring Dave back to life, but there’s a cost; he also gains the ability to see the dead.

Just getting dressed in the clothes Klaus had found him felt like a huge undertaking to Dave’s tired muscles. By the time he was done, his arms were shaking from the exertion and he collapsed back onto the bed to rest a moment. He felt suddenly nauseous, itchy all over, and his entire body felt sore and drained completely. And the horrible ache in his chest was back, like he’d been punched in the sternum. Or hit by a cannonball.

It seemed like Klaus was feeling some of the same things, because when he glanced over, he saw him scratching his back and arms and everything else as he pulled on his own clean clothes. Or, at least, cleaner. He’d just grabbed some from off the floor, doing a quick smell check before shrugging and pulling them on.

Dave couldn’t help but smile as he watched him, loving any time he got to be so himself, in all his messiness and chaos and joy. Their hire-ups tried to stifle any personality out of all of them, but they never could get to Klaus. And getting this look into his childhood, his room? He felt so lucky to be able to get this peek into his life.

He wanted to look around more, maybe examine the writing and doodles on the walls, but his head was getting so heavy and fuzzy, and he was having trouble focusing enough to even make out the words, so he let his head fall back onto the bed and closed his eyes. He was just so tired.

“Dave? Dave, can you hear me?”

Klaus’ voice broke through, bringing him back to the present, and made him realize just how close to falling asleep he’d been. But there was a fear and urgency in Klaus’ voice that he had rarely heard, and somehow that hurt more than any physical ache.

“Yeah, yeah, all good here,” he said quickly, trying to sit up a little, reaching out to blindly pat Klaus’ arm. A habit they’d picked up, a way they could show some physical comfort and reassurance even when surrounded by fellow soldiers.

“Sorry, you were just so still,” Klaus began with a shaky sigh before he seemed to pull himself back together, voice taking on a teasing tone. “I probably should have let you sleep. You look like shit.”

“Ouch,” Dave chuckled. “Hit a guy while he’s down, why don’t you.”

“Oh, don’t worry, you’ll be as good as new once you get 30 or so hours of sleep,” Klaus said with a grin.

Klaus had left the door to the bedroom open. It was a habit of his, not wanting to feel trapped, which Dave could understand. Still, if he’d been paying more attention, he might have at least asked to close it while they dressed. But then, they hadn’t seen anyone since they arrived and he was beginning to wonder if the place was completely abandoned despite how many siblings Klaus was supposed to have. He was wrong, though, and the sound of someone pointedly clearing their throat caused them to flinch apart.

“You good?” a boy, probably in his early teens, asked, one eyebrow raised as he glanced between the two of them and the bloody pile of clothes they’d left on the floor. He studied Dave with an intensity that made him feel like he was looking right through him, like there was nothing he could hope to hide from him.

“Five, hey,” Klaus exclaimed, and at least he didn’t sound upset to see him. He shrugged casually like this was all completely normal. “Yeah, fine.”

Klaus had, of course, told Dave a bit about his siblings, and Dave frantically tried to get his foggy brain to recall anything he could about this brother.

“Where do you want to begin?” Five asked, turning his full attention to Klaus, like Dave held no more interest to him.

“What do you mean?” Klaus asked innocently.

“Well, there’s the blood, the new tattoos, the man in your bed--”

Horrified, Dave shot up and scrambled off the bed to his feet. He could feel his face burning. Maybe he was overreacting, Klaus had mentioned his family didn’t caring that he was pansexual, but he didn’t exactly want to test that. Especially when the consequences of discovery not too long ago would have been severe, if not fatal. That initial fear response wasn’t something he was going to be able to overcome easily.

“Oh, no, it’s not—” Dave began, stumbling over his words and with no real idea what he was going to say, just that he needed to give Klaus some sort of out if he wanted it. Thankfully, he was interrupted.

“It’s fine, sit down,” Klaus said, waving a hand dismissively at him, like this wasn’t anything to worry about. To an amused Five, he continued, “It was just a crazy night, don’t worry about it.”

“More than one, by the looks of it,” Five said knowingly. He gestured towards Dave. “What about him?”

“I’m Dave, nice to meet you,” Dave said quickly.

“He’s with me,” Klaus said defensively. He dropped down into a chair, rubbing at his temple like his headache was getting worse. Dave let himself slump back down onto the bed, itching absently at his arm.

“Fair enough.” Five said, shoving his hands in his pockets as he studied the two of them. “You know, I can recognize the symptoms. And you’re both having them”

“What?” Klaus asked, sitting up to look at him, clearly ready for an argument.

“Jetlag, full body itch, the headache that feels like someone shoved a box of cotton up into your nose and through your brain,” Five explained, voice surprisingly sympathetic. “You gonna tell me about it?”

Klaus sighed and leaned back in his chair, glancing at Dave briefly before giving in. “Your pals, when they broke into the house and couldn't find you? They took me hostage instead.”

“And in return you stole their briefcase,” Five guessed, a slight grin tugging at his lips like he was impressed or proud.

Dave had heard some of the story and was worried Five was focusing on the wrong part. Yes, he was glad Klaus had managed to get the briefcase and escape, but if Five really did know these people that had been after him, he should know what they were capable of. What they might have put Klaus through.

“Yeah, I thought there was money in it, or I could pawn it, whatever.”

“And then, next thing you knew you were-- where? Or when?” Five asked excitedly.

“Why do you care?” Klaus said, standing up and turning away, suddenly defensive, and Dave knew he wasn’t going to tell him what else he’d been through.

“1968,” Dave filled in quickly when he saw the annoyance flash across Five’s face. He earned a glare from Klaus, and maybe he was overstepping, but he could tell when Klaus was ready to start an argument just to end a conversation. It was what he did when he felt too vulnerable, and maybe this way he could at least get the attention off of him. And, perhaps, avoid a fight between the two brothers.

“Thank you,” Five said pointedly to him. “Now, please tell me you’re from this time and just happened to accidentally get caught up in all this.”

“Um,” Dave said, glancing between the two, not sure what to say. Klaus shrugged unhelpfully.

“Klaus, you didn’t,” Five groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You can’t just— pull people out of their timelines like they’re souvenirs! Do you have any idea what his absence could do?”

“Don’t worry, he was already dead at the time,” Klaus said much too casually.

“Oh, great, you faked his death too?” Five said, exasperated.

“Didn’t need to,” Klaus said simply.

“I guess that means I was already absent from my timeline if you think about it,” Dave chimed in, earning a glare from Five. It was surreal to be talking about his own death like this, but he did his best not to think too much about it. Whatever drugs he’d taken earlier were helping with that at least.

“I— don’t have time to unpack what that’s supposed to mean,” Five said absently, beginning to pace. “Just tell me what you did with the briefcase. One disaster at a time.”

“I don’t know, I threw it in a dumpster,” Klaus shrugged.

“Where, Klaus?” Five snapped, spinning to face him, clearly running out of patience.

“In the alley behind the bus stop on 6th,” Klaus said, hands raised defensively.

“Fine. Don’t go anywhere,” Five snapped. “Just tell the others to stay put too.”

“Yeah, like they'll listen to me.”

“We’re not done talking about this,” Five spared a pointed glare in Dave’s direction before disappearing in a blue flash.

Dave just stared at the place he had been for a long moment, trying to figure out if he’d really just seen that. Sure, Klaus has talked about his family of superheroes, but it was still jarring to see someone literally vanish in front of him.

“Well, I think that went quite well,” Klaus sighed, dropping onto the bed beside him, sprawling out.

“Yeah?” Dave asked doubtfully, gingerly laying down beside him. “If that’s going well, I’m worried what going poorly will look like.”

“Blood, violence, for sure knives, there’s no getting around that one,” Klaus said cheerfully.

“You’re not helping,” Dave couldn’t help but laugh, gently shoving Klaus’ arm. But then he took his hand and squeezed it. Whatever weirdness he was going to go through, at least he could go through it with Klaus. “Are you doing okay?”

“What? Yeah, sure,” Klaus said. His voice was casual, like the answer was obvious, but there was no missing the way his eyes slid to the side, avoiding eye contact.

“Should we have told him about the whole coming back to life thing? If he knows about the briefcase, maybe he knows what happened.”

“Maybe later,” Klaus said. “He has to go save the world first.”

“Oh.”

“Come on,” Klaus jumped to his feet and hauled Dave up with him. “Let’s go raid the fridge and get some real food while we still can.”

[panic-at-the-fiction]

Hello Darling

Summary: (y/n) is the Salvatore younger sister and she is low key in love with with one of the originals. You know which one. That’s basically it.

Warnings: just harmless flirting

A/N: I’ve been in love with Kol Mikaelson for 3 days now. I’m being forced to watch vampire diaries with my mom and Kol and the rest of the original family are like the only reason I’m still watching it. Also I know the title isnot great but it’s what I could come up with so shut up.

It had been a long week in mystic falls. Hell, it had been a long year. You had only moved back to your hometown after hearing rumors that your beloved older brothers were alive and living in the small town you grew up in after all these years. You had been told they were shot by stray bullets during a battle in 1864 when you were only 15. It had hurt, especially since shortly after that your father had died after an animal attacked him. About 4 years after the deaths of your family, you had a run in with a vampire that didn’t go too well. After that, you spent years traveling from city to city just enjoying your life as a vampire.

When you finally landed back in your home town looking for your brothers, you were shocked to see that they had fallen in love with the same girl. Not only that, but a human girl who seemed to be attracted to trouble. You never liked Elena Gilbert and she never seemed to like you. She had a problem with making everyone do things her way or no way, and she always seemed to take it personally when someone made a decision on their own. You hated that your brothers were in love with her and did anything and everything she said. You had quite the temper like your brothers and Elena had a tendency to draw out the worst from you; when your idiot brothers signed over the deed to their house to Elena and she didn’t invite you in, you nearly burnt down the whole city. You had been stuck living in a small apartment, not far from the mystic grill ever since.

You tried to stay out of their drama-- you were only in town because you were worried about your brothers. Stephan had gone off the rails and was only just now starting to fix things. You had though found unlikely allies in Matt Donovan and Jeremy Gilbert. You spent a lot of your free time drinking at the mystic grill and for a while both boys had worked there; though you would never admit this to them, you had begun to consider them friends. Matt didn’t like getting involved in the vampire drama either, and you found it refreshing. Jeremy understood what it is like to have your siblings try to control everything you do. Sadly, Jeremy had been forced to leave town by none other than Elena, and of course your brother helped, which only made it worse. You hated that they had compelled him to leave. It was wrong to make his decision for him and they knew it.

You had gone to the mystic grill bar for a couple drinks. You had been invited to a ball hosted by the Mikaelsons. You thought it was pretentious that someone in the 21st century would host a ball, but you had missed the elegance of old fashioned parties like you used to attend before becoming a vampire.

You were busy in your own thoughts when you heard Caroline Forbes walk through the doors. She seemed upset, but to be honest, you didn’t care. You noticed she was looking at someone by the bar. You recognized him easily, Klaus Mikaelson. Caroline seemed angry at him, and efore you knew it she was yelling at him and storming out the door. Klaus quickly followed behind.

It was only then that you noticed the man who had been sitting next to Klaus. You didn’t recognize him. He saw you staring across the room at him and he gave you a flirtatious wink. You looked away and rolled your eyes.

Your glass was empty and you decided to walk over to the bar to get another drink. You sat down and waited for the bartender. The young man you saw earlier approached you.

“Hello, darling,” he said, taking the seat next to you. “I couldn’t help but notice you staring earlier. Like what you see?”

To say you didn’t find him attractive would be a lie, but you could tell he was cocky and arrogant: exactly the kind of guy you don’t want to be around right now. Yet, there was something familiar about him. “Yeah, no, I’m not playing this game with you,” You said turning away from him.

He walked around you so you were facing him again. “What game are you referring to?”

“Oh you know, the one where you see me across the room and we flirt and we drink and you use that smooth arrogant accent to talk your way into my pants. That game.”

“Why, I would never. I merely wanted to buy a lovely lady such as yourself a drink!” You laughed at his mockery as it was obvious his intentions were not pure.. “I’m Kol, Kol Mikaelson.”

“(Y/n) Salvatore.”

“Oh, you're a Salvatore. I hear our brothers don’t get along very well,” You laughed, he obviously didn’t care about the drama between your two families.

“No, they really don’t.”

“I do hope that unlike our brothers , you have no interest in killing me,”

“No, Kol Mikealson, I have no interest in killing you or being apart of any of my brothers stupid plans.” You took a swig of your drink. To be honest you were jealous of all the time your brothers put into defeating the originals and protecting Elena. They had thought you were dead for over a hundred years and they didn’t even seem to care that you moved back to town. In fact, they seemed to only think of you as a problem these days. A threat to their precious Elena’s safety. It made you furious to even think about it, hence your day drinking. You set down your glass.

“Well then, in that case, (y/n) Salvatore, why don’t you be my date this evening to my mother’s ball? It would surely piss off both our brothers,” You basically laughed in his face, but Kol just smiled and stood there.

“You want me to be your date to your moms fancy ball? You don’t even know me,” You were completely lost. An over confident guy flirting at you while you're at the bar was typical, but a thousand year old vampire you don’t know asking you to go to a ball was more than strange.

“Oh come on, (y/n), it could be fun. I’ve been told I know how to have a good time. Though, that was in 1910. I might not be as fun as I used to be, but I’m sure I will work it out.” He leaned in closer to where you were sitting. You were staring him dead in the eyes now.

“It would piss off Stefan and Damon, and I’m still mad at them for brainwashing one of my only friends in this town. Sounds like it could be fun., but let’s be clear: this is not a real date. I am simply accompanying you to your mom’s party.”

“Well, I’ll take that as a yes, then. I’ll see you tonight (y/n),” He winked and walked to the door where his brother Klaus was standing. He seemed angry, like he was mad at Kol for talking to you. What could you expect? Your brothers hated Klaus, why wouldn’t he hate his own brother talking to you? You still had a hundred questions left for the young original. You hadn’t even been sure you wanted to go to the ball, let alone with a date. There were a hundred reasons as to why you should not go, but of the few things Kol had gotten right was that it would piss off your brothers, especially Damon. Besides, it could be fun.

To be continued...

@hellish-ramblings-of-an-emo thanks for all the help on this one. You’ve been such a kind friend and theirs no one else out there like you.

Update: You can find chapter two on my blog!

[spritewrites]

inhibitions (or, high five)

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy

Characters: Vanya & Five

Word Count: 2062

Warnings: drug use, mentions of alcohol abuse

“Ahem.”

Slam. “Ow.”

“What are you doing?” Vanya asked, peering around the cabinet door to where Five was cursing and rubbing his head.

“Nothing.”

Vanya raised her eyebrows. “Doesn’t look like nothing.”

“Yeah, well, it’s nothing, okay?” Five snapped, sticking his sore head back in the cabinet.

Well, that’s bullshit. “You sure?”

Five huffed. “Let me assure you, I am one hundred percent certain that I am doing absolutely nothing of interest to you right now.”

He briefly pulled his head out (carefully avoiding the top) to see Vanya giving him one of her soft smiles. “Rooting around in the back of a cabinet is pretty interesting to me.”

A long, low exhale. He was eyeing her carefully, the same way he did the first day he came home. Like he didn’t know who to trust. “Fine. Do you happen to know where dear old Dad kept the alcohol?”

The crease between Vanya’s eyes deepened. “We have a whole bar, Five.”

“Yes, yes, I know, but we’re… uh, out. Did the old man have any backup storage?”

“I think he got rid of it all when Klaus started drinking.” She put a gentle hand on Five’s shoulder, startling him. Instantly, the hand was back at her side. Right. The touch thing. “Are you okay?”

He sighed, running his small hand through his hair. “Yep. Fine. Great. Just… need to take the edge off.”

Everything went still.

“Five.”

“What,” he snapped. “Are you going to lecture me about the long-term effects of alcohol on my goddamn pre-teen body like everyone else? Because trust me, I’ve calculated exactly the blood alcohol content that –”

“No, I – no. I was just going to say…” She swallowed hard, then met his gaze, her kind eyes and his blazing ones. The corner of her lip tugged upward. “I’ve got something that might help.”

*

Honestly, Vanya never thought that her birthday gift from Klaus would ever be anything more than a joke. “So you don’t blow up the moon again,” he’d said with a wink, “now that you’re off your pills and everything.” But now, sitting on the floor of her childhood bedroom ripping open a package of laced gummies with her 58-year-old brother, she was so, so glad she had it.

The circles under Five’s eyes had gotten worse over the past few weeks, and even though she knew he’d never say anything, it was clear that putting down the staggering weight of the apocalypse after forty-five years of carrying it was proving difficult for her brother. She saw the way he startled at his reflection, the way his fingers flexed absent-mindedly toward his hip, right where a holster might be, the way he counted the people in the room, the way he would talk too quietly or too loudly, or left out details in stories, as if he couldn’t gauge how much of a given conversation was supposed to happen in his head.

He’d taken to drinking, of course – he’d been drinking since he got back. But now he seemed to rarely be without a glass in his hand. And Vanya saw the way his shoulders relaxed when he took a sip, the way his tapping foot and twitching eyelid settled.

Vanya was used to watching. She knew how to see things.

She’d been saving the candy especially for him, for when he needed it. Tomorrow she’d go to the liquor store for him; she knew better than to recommend he go cold-turkey. Five was smart. With the right support, he’d slow down on his own, when he was ready. That was her job, being the right support.

Therapy would probably be good too.

“I don’t like sweets,” he reminded her, and for a second her heart lurched for the thirteen-year-old boy who was once caught with a half-empty can of cake frosting under his bed.

“These’ll help. Just trust me?” It was a request, an olive branch. Slowly, he nodded.

“Okay.”

*

“—It wasn’t even the most dangerous situation I’d been in that week! Dolores was furious at me for days, of course, but at least I got some wine out of it,” Five said, tipping his head back to stare at the popcorn ceiling. Vanya was giggling at his story, watching the faint smile dance over her brother’s face at the memory.

“I thought the apocalypse would be, just like… shitty forever.”

Five sighed. “It was. But you know. You can’t be unhappy for 45 years straight, your body doesn’t work that way. There were good times.”

Vanya giggled again. She couldn’t seem to stop doing that. “I can’t do anything straight.”

For a beat, Five studied her, his expression unreadable. Then he broke into a surprisingly bright smile.

“That was a joke.” It wasn’t a question.

Vanya gave her brother a light shove. The way a sister might to a brother. “Of course it was, idiot.”

He shoved her back, smiling wider than Vanya had seen in a long time. “Don’t call me an idiot. Idiot.” The twitch in his eyebrow was gone. Vanya suddenly went quiet, the light feeling in her core spreading throughout her chest at this realization.

“Five?”

“Hm?”

“I love you a lot.”

Five was quiet too, then, but not unusually so; Five was always quiet, when he wasn’t yelling. His eyes traced patterns in the ridges and dips of the ceiling plaster.

“I love you too.” He turned to look at her. “I missed you.”

“I know, Five,” she replied, because she did. “I missed you too.” Because she does. Did. Does.

His face split again, into that same bright, open smile. “You know what I would think about? Out in the apocalypse?”

“What?”

“When we would stay up all night sometimes talking. Remember that? Jesus, we must’ve been… ten? Eleven? And we’d be up for hours… I don’t even remember what we talked about. Math, probably.” Five shrugged. “I had conversations like that with Dolores, after. Or sometimes you.”

“Me?”

He smoothed out the fabric of his shorts. “Yeah, you were there in the apocalypse with me. I had your book, remember? Closest I could get to someone talking to me.”

Vanya tried to meet his eyes, but he was gone somewhere. A gentle hand found his arm. He flinched a little, but didn’t pull away. “I’m here now.”

He nodded, and when he spoke, it sounded strangled somehow. “Thanks.”

A passing truck honked its horn. Vanya thunked her head back on a bedpost, sinking into the floaty feeling that had settled right around her sternum. She got why Klaus did this. It felt like she could say anything, or do anything, and everything would be okay.

Five made a kind of whining noise in the back of his throat. “I want donuts.”

Vanya closed her eyes, smiling. “Shit, donuts sound great right now.”

“The jelly-filled ones from Griddy’s.”

“Yeah, when you get there at like eight p.m. and they’ve just finished the last batch of the day so they’re, like, fresh and shit.”

“Fuck,” Five sighed, pulling the back of his blazer over his head and slouching. “I want donuts.”

Despite herself, Vanya started giggling again. “You look ridiculous.”

“Excuse you,” Five replied, wrinkling his nose. “I am a trained assassin of the Commission, licensed to travel space and time with an assault rifle. I never look ridiculous.”

“You look like a Founding Father.”

The look that Five shot Vanya sent chills running down her spine. But like, in a fun way.

“Take that back.”

“No.”

“You asshole, take it –”

“No, you look like Benjamin goddamn Frank – hey!” Before she could so much as blink, Five had pounced, swatting at her arms when she laughingly brought them up to protect herself. “Go away, you know I’m right!”

Five was grinning too, slipping his fingers past her weak defenses to mess up her hair and poke at her cheeks until she had to hold her stomach in laughter. “Take it back, I said!” he crowed, sounding like he was on the edge of laughter himself. He managed a lucky strike when blunt fingernails skated over the crease of her neck, and she scrunched her shoulder with a squeal.

“No – no, fuck, Five –”

Vanya’s flailing hands struggled to gain any sort of advantage against Five’s skilled assassin reflexes, to no avail. She was horribly ticklish at the best of times, but now the ruthless pokes that were attacking her nerves overwhelmed her, and she curled up into a ball of giggles on the floor.

Through wet lashes she could see Five’s grin as he methodically took her apart, relentlessly tickling all the places he knew were torture – ears down to collarbone, and then jumping down to squeeze at her sides, making her shriek. His skinny teenage fingers were unfortunately perfect for tickling at her ribs and sneaking their way into the crease of her neck.

Vanya was laughing the hardest she’d laughed in a long time, maybe ever. Nobody in recent memory had known her like this, known her well enough to completely eviscerate her the way that Five always, always could. Damn him. This was definitely cheating.

Her laughter hit a fever pitch when Five got a hold of one of her kicking feet. Shit.

“Please, I – fuck! Okay, okay, I take it back, mercy!”

Five stopped, smirking. “Assassins don’t show mercy, except to ticklish sisters.”

A few residual giggles escaped through Vanya’s nose. “Shut up.”

“Me, shut up? Me? Excuse you, you called me a fucking Founding Father –”

“I didn’t say you were a Founding Father, I said you looked –”

“Vanya, I don’t think you understand that I am still holding on to your ankle, and strategically – hey!”

Swiftly, Vanya scooped up his own ankle and held it in her lap, a mischievous smirk on her face. She had completely forgotten about Five’s thing with unanticipated touch, but his eyes were just as bright as hers. “Oh yeah?”

Five’s smirk didn’t waver. “Nice try, I’m not ticklish.”

“Is that so?” She tugged on his leg, tucking it under her arm and hovering her fingertips over his knee. Five nearly choked.

“Wait –”

A squeeze was all it took for Five to collapse into hysterical laughter, squirming and flailing, but more squeezes couldn’t hurt. Vanya was grinning, digging in mercilessly. Served him right for attacking her, he wasn’t not the only one who remembers ticklish spots. It occurred to her that she was maybe being a little cruel, going right for his weakness immediately, but the loud, bright cackles pouring out of her brother’s mouth were worth every kick that he landed.

Five pounded a fist on the floor, mouthing something resembling words, but he couldn’t manage anything coherent through his helpless laughter. All right then, mercy it is. She graciously released his leg, which shot up into his body as he curled in on himself.

“F-fuck you,” he panted.

Vanya chuckled. “Oh come on, surely assassins are familiar with the concept of revenge?”

He said nothing, but his smile, weak from tickles, widened. She wrinkled her brow. “What’s that for?”

“S’nothing. Hic.”

“Are you… are those hiccups?”

“No.” Hic. “…Fuck off.”

Vanya burst into another fit of laughter, earning her a light shove. Five tried to school his face into an angry expression, but he was laughing too.

“I take back everything I said, I didn’t miss you, I don’t love you, you’re an asshole –”

She giggled and shoved him back. “You’re an asshole, but we love you anyway.”

The faux-anger melted away. “I know.”

For a long moment, a comfortable silence fell over the siblings, the kind that they used to fall into around four in the morning when they had both squeezed onto Five’s bed for the night to talk about training and music and math and family.

Five yawned despite himself. “M’fuckin’ sleepy,” he grumbled.

Vanya smiled. “You sound like a kid.”

“I look like one, too,” he said, and at first Vanya thought he might be angry. He usually was when he talked about his body. But then he smiled again. He kept doing that. His eyes were shining. “I’m sorry it took me so long. The calculation took years.”

Vanya shifted to face him. “Talk to me about it.”

Five’s smile grew, and Vanya knew, somewhere in her chest, that they would be okay.

[thegoldendawn]

Golden Dawn when one (or some) of them catch a cold please, if it's possible. I really really like you headcanons ♡♡♡

It’s time for love and care hours, hell yeah. 

Hamon cooks for whoever is sick. It’s delicious and heavenly and warm. The problem is that everyone else tries to pitch in and the soup is suddenly a disaster and it looks suspiciously green.

Langris begrudgingly offers them a cherry tart and threatens them with a “get better soon or you will suffer.”

Mimosa leaves plants and flowers around the room that help with sleeping and recovery. She also provides some medicinal herbs which, frankly, taste terrible.

David is a chaotic bastard and makes the sick person laugh so hard they end up coughing even worse. David is forcibly removed from the premises.

Letoile studies up on colds and shit and does her best to make the sick person comfortable. Blankets, pillows, ice packs, whatever it is they need, she’s got ‘em covered.

Yuno sends in cool breezes here and there, as well as offers tatoes. The person with a cold tactically disposes of the tatoes.

Alecdora awkwardly offers to paint for them because he doesn’t know what else to do. Depending on who they are, the sick person either tells him to leave or humors him while miserably sneezing and coughing.

Siren, being the stone-cold, silent guy he is, just tells them to get better.

William shows the sick person his bird journal. There are many lovely birbs in the journal. Although he has to do this from like six feet away to avoid getting his journal dirty. He occasionally comes in to check on his sick squadmate to make sure they’re doing alright.

Klaus. Oh boy, Klaus. This man absolutely showers the ill person with care. “ARE YOU OKAY” “DO YOU NEED MORE BLANKETS” “YES YOU NEED MORE BLANKETS GIVE ME LIKE THREE MORE LETOILE.” He checks in on them every two minutes and frets over them insanely. Constantly asking if you’re feeling better or if you need something. It’s cute at first, but then you cough, and at 2 am, Klaus drops in from the vents with some more cough drops and gives you a heart attack.

Bonus:

“What the hell do you mean everyone except me got sick?”

“Sorry-*cough*-Langris, but could you-*wheeze* get me some water?”

The next day, in the news:

Salty Vice-Captain Tries to Help His Squadmates Recover From a Cold and Fails Miserably, Base Gets Set on Fire

“Those pompous assholes might just be worse than us,” -Yami Sukehiro, Captain of The Black Bulls

“It was beautiful in its own catastrophic way,” -Kirsch Vermillion, Member of The Coral Peacocks

“So it turns out I am better at him at something,” -Finral Roulacase, Member of The Black Bulls

[yeah-klave]

A Short History of What Happened - Chapter 4

Written, with love, for EnKlave Fest 2021.

Catch up with the story so far: Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3

Prompt: Omegas aren’t allowed to join the army, but then Omega!Klaus gets dropped into Vietnam and has to pose as a Beta. He manages quite well, right until he goes into heat. Alpha!Dave is protective and incredibly aroused/horny.

Genre: Omega verse, smut, developing relationships, slow burn, undercover, misunderstandings, secretly in love.

Word length: This chapter: 2.1k

Warning: Implied, canon-compliant abuse. The entire work, when posted, will contain explicit sexual content. (Also, my knowledge of the Vietnam war is almost non-existent. I’ve tried to keep historic/military references throughout this fic to a minimum, but I’ve had to take a few liberties in this chapter to provide the right context for this conversation. Please just roll with it.)

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of The Umbrella Academy characters or settings.

***************************************************************

Fate, that fickle mistress, dealt a blow the following morning.

The unit had been redeployed and were heading out to a new location that day. Most of their airborne unit were to be dropped in directly. A select few, however, were required to provide ground support to the convoy of trucks. Dave had been selected. And so, as it turned out, had Klaus.

Most of the men were to ride in the back of the trucks, ready, in case of an ambush. 

Dave – less than enthusiastic at the thought of several hours caged up in a hot, metal tube – had offered to act as rear guard and follow the convoy on foot as it made its way through the marshy, inhospitable landscape.

He had already turned to begin checking his pack, when he heard a light, musical voice volunteer to join him. Head bowed, large, strong hands pausing in their methodical inspection of his rifle clips, Dave felt a physical thrill run through his entire body, a tingling jolt that started in his stomach, then radiated out to his fingers and toes and the tips of his hair.

As the trucks began their slow progress, Dave took his position next to the small man in the borrowed clothes. Keeping a reasonable distance from the convoy, they began their hike.

Dave focussed hard. He tried desperately to keep his mind clear of the intoxicating scent and not let himself become distracted by the most beautiful face he had ever seen. He held his gun at the ready and kept his eyes on the landscape around them, vigilant of the dangers.

Klaus was not as diligent. He held his gun loosely in his hands, as though it was a weight he was unused to carrying. In his peripheral vision, Dave noticed that Klaus looked around him with wide eyes, a look of curious wonder on his face that any significant amount of time in the field would surely have dampened to a resigned acceptance.

Dave took a deep breath, holding the conversational ball close to his chest for a final moment, before readying himself to take a swing and serve it into Klaus’ court.

“You’re lucky, you know,” he said quietly. A thwack of rubber against taught lattice strings. He kept his eyes forwards, watching the terrain and his words and the progress of the ball.

Klaus looked over at him. Dave shot a glance his way and Klaus immediately lowered his gaze, then looked up again shyly through his long, dark lashes.

“And why’s that?” he said, his voice light and breathy. He raised one eyebrow slightly, eyes twinkling and the corner of his mouth curling up into the beginning of a smile. Slowly, he parted his lips a fraction and gently bit his bottom lip. Dave could see the tiny, white press of pressure as Klaus’ teeth slowly dragged over the blood darkened skin. Still looking up into Dave’s face, Klaus opened his mouth a little more and gently ran the tip of his tongue over his bottom lip.

Dave swallowed hard and snapped his eyes forwards again. He cleared his throat, took a deep breath that smelled like something sweet and musky and unfamiliar, and replied, “Well, out of all the units you could have stumbled into, you managed to pick the one made up entirely of betas.” He paused, then added as an afterthought. “Well, except me, of course.”

Dave heard Klaus give a snort and turned his head quickly to catch Klaus swotting at a mosquito.

“Shut up,” he said in an undertone, “he isn’t.”

Dave eyebrows crinkled in confusion. “Pardon?” he said.

Klaus bared his teeth, hissed and swotted again.

“Got it?” Dave asked.

“What?” Klaus said distractedly, looking back over at Dave. His brows were knitted together and he had a pained expression of concentration on his face. His eyes wandered over Dave’s shoulder.

“Fuck tests!” he said abruptly.

“Klaus?” Dave said, concerned, “are you okay?”

Klaus snapped his eyes back to Dave’s face. “Peachy,” he replied, but it still sounded a bit sad. Or sceptical.

“I think,” Klaus blurted suddenly, “I think you mean you’re lucky.” If those words were a creature, they would be something with a sting.

Dave frowned again, suddenly feeling as though there were more balls in play than he had originally thought.

Dave tracked the conversation back, then frowned deeper. “But… that’s… what I said.”

“No, no, no,” Klaus waved his hands in frustration. Dave’s eyes followed the movement of Klaus’ arms and the purple shadow of bruising that ringed his wrists. Dave’s stomach churned and he felt the prickle of anger take root in the base of his skull.

Klaus’ eyes were raking over Dave’s face. “No, you think you’re the lucky one.” He paused, then added with a little shrug. “All betas means no competition for you.” He paused and frowned, his nose scrunching adorably. “I mean,” he added, “no competition for me. Over me. Lucky old you.”

Dave could hear his heart pounded in his ears.

“So, big boy,” Klaus held Dave’s gaze, “which one of these trees are you going to pin me against while you wrap your hand around my throat and fuck me so hard I’ll barely be able to walk?”

The pounding in Dave’s ears turned to a roar. In a sickening rush he thought of bruises and bloody towels and wide, scared eyes and a fear so strong and deep he could smell it.

“Oh no,” he said firmly, “no, no. Just no. That’s not… I’m not like that.”

Crash. Bang. There it was. The slip of the tongue. The fork in the road. The miscommunication.

Klaus’ face had turned to stone. His expression was unreadable, but the air around them had soured. If Dave hadn’t been so preoccupied, he might have recognised it as the bitter smell of disappointment.  

Dave ploughed on. “We’re not all aggressors, you know? Not all egocentric pricks who think the world owes us sex and submission.” He wasn’t sure Klaus was listening. His eyes had slipped over Dave’s shoulder again.

“Oh,” Klaus said in a small voice. “So, you’re just being kind to the queer, little omega freak out of the good of your heart, are you?”

Dave felt his stomach twist and a pang of guilt washed over him. Beautiful, he had thought. Heartbreakingly beautiful. This was going so wrong. So utterly, completely wrong.

“It’s,” he started. “I mean… Some of us are just decent, you know? We’re not all dicks. I mean, really, the primary role of an alpha is as protector and caregiver.”

Klaus snorted again. It smelled like sadness and derision and disbelief.

“Yeah,” he huffed under his breath. “Well, not in my experience.”

And Dave’s heart clenched again. Clenched for every bad thing that had ever happened to this man to make him react like that.

“I’m not like… that.” Dave said, slowly and clearly. Whatever, that was exactly. He just knew he wasn’t. He would never be the type of alpha who would make any omega scared or uncomfortable. Or worse. “I just want to help you,” he said simply.

Klaus turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow. “Really?” he asked, the scepticism thick in his voice.

“Really, really.” Dave said earnestly, holding Klaus’ gaze. He determinedly ignored the butterflies of desire in his stomach and resolutely refused to register the utterly enchanting shade of Klaus’ green eyes.

Klaus held his gaze for a moment longer, his brows furrowing slightly his questioning stare flicking between Dave’s eyes, as though trying to read something behind them.

“I don’t think I thanked you for the clothes before,” he said slowly.

Dave breathed a sigh. Of relief? He wasn’t sure. “No problem,” he said instead. “Although,” he added slowly, “I should probably ask you why you needed them.”

Klaus looked him straight in the eye and deadpanned, “Because all I was wearing was a towel.” He held Dave’s gaze. It felt like a test.

“Really,” Dave added composedly. “I hadn’t noticed.”

Klaus’ face fell. Dave had thought that was the right answer, but at the sadness in Klaus’ eyes, he still felt like he had failed somehow.

Klaus took a resolute breath, then added with a straight face, “So used to following your nose, did you forget how your eyes worked?”

Klaus appraised him stonily for approximately three seconds before his face cracked into a small, lopsided grin. It still looked a little sad, but the tension broke between them.

“Very funny, smart ass.” Dave huffed, grinning back. He was definitely not thinking about how dazzling Klaus’ smile was. “Get in there quick with the big, dumb alpha jokes. Typist humour. Very witty.” But there was no bite to his words. They were like the roughhousing of an old, familiar, family dog – more fluff and licks than nips and barks.

“Sometimes you guys just walk straight into them,” Klaus smiled, giving Dave a quick wink. Dave’s stomach flipped over.

“Yeah, yeah,” Dave rolled his eyes, playing along, “that’s why they make us so big, right? Extra cushioning for when we’re so dumb we bump into things…?”

“You said it, not me!” Klaus giggled. Actually giggled. The butterflies in Dave’s stomach did a few somersaults.

Quite settled around them like a blanket. But it was comfortable silence. Warm and weighted. An old familiar blanket that got brought out, year after year, to chase away the bite of winter. The kind of blanket you wanted to keep in your life forever. A patchwork that only improved with age.

After a while, Dave turned back to Klaus. “So,” he ventured tentatively, “do you want to tell me why you were only wearing a towel?”

Klaus sighed deeply and looked down at his fingers which had started fiddling distractedly with the strap of his gun.

“That’s a long story,” he sighed, “and I’m not quite sure how to tell it.” He went quiet and Dave thought he might have lost him. Shut him down. Pushed him too far. Stupid, Dave thought. Just as he was starting to relax around you. You went and pushed too far, expected too much.

“Would it help if I tried to fill in the blanks a bit?” Dave asked gently. “You could just answer yes or no?”

He smelled the relief on Klaus before he saw it reflected in his eyes. Distantly, he wondered when his sense of smell had developed so much. He couldn’t remember ever being able to smell emotions as clearly or as strongly as this from any other omega. It must be because I haven’t been around omegas for so long, thought Dave. He must just smell extra strong to me now, or something, because of prolonged lack of exposure.

“Yeah,” Klaus croaked. “That’s probably a good idea.”

Dave took a deep breath and began. “Were you running away from someone?”

“Yes.” Klaus replied. Dave’s brain filled in the blanks, supplied a series of images of an amorphous ex.

“Were they hurting you?” he asked.

“Yes.” Klaus confirmed. An abusive amorphous ex. The images got progressively darker. The prickle of anger at the base of Dave’s skull grew teeth.

“Are they gone for good?” he asked.

Klaus swallowed. “No.” He paused for a long moment. “I don’t think so.” Another pause. “I don’t know.”

“Do they want you back?”

Klaus snorted. Ahead of them, one of the trucks revved its engine and Dave almost missed Klaus’ answer. But, under his breath, Dave though he heard Klaus mumble, “Nobody wants me.”

Dave could hear his heartbeat again. It was hammering a drumbeat rhythm in his ears. He was almost convinced Klaus must be able to hear it.

“Is here better than… anywhere else?” Dave paused. “Wherever else you have?”

Dave watched Klaus considering his question and weighing up his answer.

“I don’t know.” Klaus said eventually. “I mean… I am, what I am, where I am. But really… here, there, anywhere. It’s all the same really. I have about as much connection here as I would anywhere else.”

Dave nodded. A fresh start. He could understand that. He could understand that more than anyone.

“So,” he pitched his voice low and calm, his kept his eyes forwards, “do you want to stay?”

Dave could feel Klaus’ eyes on him, but he didn’t look over. He gave Klaus the space to study his face.

Finally, Klaus replied. “Yes,” he said simply, “Yes, I think that maybe I do.”

Dave tried to suppress a smile. He failed.

************************

Yeah-Klave Master List

[ticklishpeter]

oh, diego (diego/basically everyone)

SELF-INDULGENT FIC HELLO!! i truly had lots of fun writing this and i’m,,, just so soft for this boy. i hope y’all enjoy!!!!

summary: there were two things diego just never grew out of: his love for knives, and his unbearably ticklish tummy.

word count: 2,776

7 months.

Seven months of the seven tiny superpowered babies living in Reginald’s household. Grace, of course, couldn't comprehend that fact; and Reginald was always too “busy” to. Making her rounds through the halls, she found herself stopped outside of the master bedroom, suddenly attentive towards a familiar sound. 

“Oh, Diego,” Grace muttered over the sound of his loud crying coming from the second crib in the lineup of seven. He’d always been the loudest crier.

“Hey, silly,” she smiled, reaching into the crib to hold the baby. Bouncing him up and down, she hummed a little song.

His dark eyes stared at her, within seconds he'd quieted down, even beginning to smile a bit.

“There's my boy.” Grace wiggled her fingers lightly on his tiny stomach, chuckling at the bubbly laughter that the action produced.

Tummy raspberries always had done the trick for Diego. He could be crying one second and squealing with sweet laughter the next, which is exactly what happened that night; he got all tickled out.

“Goodnight, silly.”

No more tears left his eyes that night, as he dozed off alongside his six siblings.

4 years.

“Oh,” Grace hummed, noticing the warm glow of Number Two’s Batman lamp through the crack of his door. She opened the door further, only to find him twirling a slightly rounded, tiny, ‘child-safe’ knife that he'd gotten for his birthday; purely for practice purposes. “Diego, sweetie, it's time for bed.” Her voice was soft and sweet, much unlike Reginald’s. 

“But I don't want to,” he whined, typical for a four year old, as he sat up in his bed, back resting against the wall and his legs sprawled out in front of him.

Grace thought for a moment, looking at the floor with a small smile, before looking back up at her clearly sleepy son, “Well, what if I told you…” She sat at the edge of his bed with wide playful eyes, “that the tickle monster says it's time for bed.” 

“No he didn't,” Diego crossed his arms, holding his chin up high towards her with a knowing smile.

“Yes, he did,” Grace corrected him, “and he's right here!” Growling playfully, she grabbed at his tiny thighs, pinching up and down.

A loud squeal escaped Diego's mouth, “No! M-m-mama,” he giggled, instinctually twisting and turning his body to and fro.

“Sh, sh, shh,” his mother chuckled jokingly, “You don't want to wake the others, do you?”

Diego slapped a hand over his mouth shaking his head, attempting to stop the flood of giggles, only to squeal again, perhaps even louder, when he felt Grace’s mechanical tickling fingers move their way up to his tummy. 

“Mama,” he giggled, arching his back and kicking his little legs.

“Who's ‘mama?’ I'm the tickle monster, remember?” Her deep, gruff, pretend-voice mixed with the teasing made little Diego laugh even louder. She took advantage of his PJ shirt riding up slightly, slipping her fingers underneath it, poking curiously at his belly button, “What's this? A tickle button?”

Diego screamed the highest-pitched scream you would ever hear out of a little boy, “NO,” he hiccuped, curling up his body and attempting to roll onto his stomach in defense, “No more tickle monster! Tickle monster, go away! I'll go to sleep! Promise!” he laughed, slapping at Grace’s hands.

As soon as Grace let up, Diego settled his head back onto his pillow, wary about any additional tickles that would ensue if he didn't.

“Goodnight, Diego,” she laughed, placing a kiss to his temple and tucking him in under his matching Batman blankets.

He slept with a small smile throughout the night.

7 years.

It was sparring time; everyday from nine to noon. Diego hadn’t slept well, as it was his first night without a night light, which he never admit to the others. With the lack of sleep, and the totally unfair matchup of him and his super strong brother, he was a bit slow today. 

Luther and Diego tussled on the floor, surrounded by padding and soft mats in case of any throwing around. All had been going as it always did, until the wrestling ceased,  “Oh!” Luther yelped at the super sudden movement and wince beneath him. 

“Diego, are y-?” Thinking he had hurt him by accident, his eyebrows furrowed in surprise when he saw a grin on his smaller brother’s face. Noticing Diego’s firm grasp on his wrist, in addition to the fact that his hand was pressed to his stomach, everything clicked.

Diego practically saw the lightbulb in Luther’s brain turn on, and he began to squirm. “N-No,” Number Two whined, a strain in his voice as he tried hopelessly to push the strong hand off of his middle.

A chortle left Luther’s mouth as he began to wiggle his fingers. The screech that followed made a few of the other siblings stifle their own laughter. 

“Stop it! No -” he growled, trying not to laugh, twisting his body around as he pushed as hard as he could at his brother’s tickling hand. “Dad! One’s ch-che-...cheatihihing! - AH!” 

Why wasn’t his father doing anything? Was this fair? It sure didn’t seem like it.

Luther’s tickles were relentless, and surprisingly light, which only made things worse. The high-pitched scream that escaped him made him blush as he squeezed his eyes closed, “S-s-stop it! Sh-shut up!” He could hear his siblings laughing at the probably pitiful sight.

His legs kicked and drummed at the matted floor beneath them as he reached an arm out to smack the floor, tapping out. “Stop, stop! O-Okay! I give.” 

He stood, pout plastered on his face, as he bumped Luther with his shoulder and made his way over to his siblings.

11 years.

“Oh,” Five scoffed and crossed his arms, “Diego, c’mon! We don't have all day.” He stood alongside his four other crime-fighting siblings, in line for their monthly physical exams. 

“Sh-shut up. I-I can … d-do-do it,” he muttered, readjusting himself on the paper-covered table. The scowl on his father’s face made him want to cry, so he closed his eyes, gripping the sides of the table in anticipation.

“Diego, sweetheart, you have to relax your stomach, dear.” Grace stood over him, on the other side of the table, opposite Reginald. 

He relaxed his muscles as much as he could, before tensing them back up with a sharp gasp when he felt his mother’s cold robot hands touch his stomach. “No!” Squeezing his eyes closed, he whined and turned his head away, trying his hardest to focus his mind on something other than his poor ticklish middle. 

Mere seconds after the examination continued, Diego was sitting straight up, covering his middle, and looking at his father with puppy-dog eyes, “Ca-c-can I have a b-...break, please? M-m-m-...maybe Five can go?” His stutter always became especially prevalent when he was nervous. 

“No,” Reginald snapped, “Number Two, we don’t have all day, and three of your siblings still have yet to be examined. We need to be wise with our time.” 

Diego closed his eyes again with a nod as he settled back down onto the table. 

“I'll try to be quick, sweetie,” Grace said to him over the squeak that left the boy’s mouth when she placed her hands back onto the hypersensitive skin.

Diego’s lips formed a straight line as he tried to keep his laughter at bay, but as soon as his mother reached his lower tummy, he broke, drumming one foot on the table. A stream of uncontrollable giggles, punctuated by snorts and squeaky hiccups, flowed out of his mouth as he grabbed at the table, ripping the paper in the process.

He held onto her wrists as she finished up the examination, as if it would help him feel more in control and therefore, less tickly, to no avail. Trying his very hardest not to pry them away, he wriggled and screeched at the feeling of each finger prodding into his belly.

“Aww, what’s the matter, Diego? Ticklish tummy?” Klaus laughed, elbowing a giggling Luther. Allison laughed as well, glancing over at Five, who was trying not to smile, and Ben, who was shifting his weight from one foot to the other, almost.. Nervously?

“Okay,” Grace’s kind voice piped up, seemingly a millisecond before Diego was on his feet and storming away, arms crossed and face red.

18 years.

Klaus caught Diego stealing another piece of their birthday cake, “Hey, you already had your piece,” he tattled, pointing at him, which directed Allison and Luther’s attention to him. Sighs and scoffs from the both of them only made him want to steal the cake more; he loved making his siblings mad. 

“Oh, Diego,” Allison exclaimed in an almost warning tone, “We’re 18 now, and you're… well…being a little bit of an ass,” she chuckled, turning to the rest of them, “I think he's deserving of 18 minutes of tickles, don't you guys?”

“N-no - hey,” Diego grunted, feet suddenly lifting off the ground before he could run, “P-put me down! Luther!” He kicked and writhed as much as he could within his brother’s strong hold, his arms flailing at his sides.

Luther had picked him up from his underarms, which had made his shirt ride up, and Diego imagined it looked absolutely pathetic.

“Oh, look Klaus! You remember how ticklish he was here, right?” Allison poked at his exposed tummy once, before laughing at the way he thrashed.

Diego’s eyebrows furrowed as he frowned, still using all his might to escape the situation, “No, I-I… I’m not,” he growled.

“Really,” Allison mused, her voice dripping with mischief as she crossed her arms and looked at him.

“Timer’s set! - It’s showtime.” Klaus stood and cracked his fingers with a smile before wiggling them teasingly towards Diego’s torso. 

Number Two silently cursed at the giggle that had bubbled up in his throat. Looking at those goddamn fingers and knowing how much they were about to tickle was enough to make him squirm like mad. “St-stohop,” Diego kicked a leg out, as if he could push his two menacing siblings away, but they just kept coming closer.

Diego let out a strangled noise and his smile grew bigger as they moved towards him. Why could he already feel it? … Or at least, he thought he could, because the second he felt ten brutal nails touch down on his stomach, and ten more fingers wrap around his sides, he was done for. He yelped and twisted fervently, “F-f-fuck OHOFF -” he guffawed before his laughter immediately went silent. 

“Sorry, Allison, did I hear him right? He said he’s not ticklish?” Klaus inquired, an eyebrow raised as he squeezed expertly up and down his smaller brother’s sides. 

“That’s what I thought he said too. But look at him now! He’s so giggly and squirmy! Looks pretty ticklish to me.” Allison smiled with a shrug, poking all ten of her fingers into the flesh near his waistband. 

“Shut up,” he squeaked, definitely trying to sound intimidating, but he ended up sounding just like he did when he was seven years old, which made him blush at himself, attempting to hide his face in his shoulder. Falling into a fit of snorts and cackles when Allison and Klaus burst into a cacophony of “tickle, tickle, tickle”s and “kitchie koo”s did not help his case in the slightest as he felt his face heat up and he kicked his legs around helplessly. 

“Aww, isn’t his laugh just the cutest?” Klaus cooed, skating his fingers around to his stomach. Allison nodded as she shook her hands into either side of his belly button.

Diego’s eyes wettened and his struggles became weaker, “Shut up,” he mouthed through silent laughter. A loud hiccup made him whine and hide his face again.

Needless to say, Klaus and Allison took their sweet time; 18 full minutes of unbearable torture. 

Some birthday, Diego thought, about an hour later when he came to. And he never even got his extra cake.

25 years.

“Oh, Diego,” A blissful sigh left Patch’s lips as she plopped down onto the bed next to him, “You're so fucking good at that.” Her hand traced over the scar on the side of his head and down to his chest.

“You’re so fucking good at all of it,” he hummed, slapping the other’s butt before moving his hand up to hold her waist. Their lips found each other’s, both sighing into the kiss. That is, until Diego angled his head away with a sharp inhale. He just couldn’t help but notice Patch’s nails tracing little shapes right below his chest. A gulp.

Patch’s eyebrows furrowed as she moved her head back to look at her boyfriend.

The corner of his mouth twitched as he squirmed ever-so-slightly.

Not slightly enough.

“No way,” Patch grinned, “Are you ticklish?” She spidered her fingers over the side of his stomach. 

“N-Nohoho,” he pressed his lips shut after the unfairly cute giggle slipped out. The eye contact seemed to make it three times worse. 

“It sure sounds like you are,” Patch only smiled bigger as she continued to scribble her nails around Diego’s toned stomach, laughing at his dramatically violent reactions.

He laughed louder than her though, cackling when she pinched the area right below his belly button. He flung his legs up, getting his knees as close to his chest as possible… but god damn it, her hands were still there. His curling up ultimately made it more difficult to get away from them. “S-stop,” he whimpered between bouts of laughter, letting his legs kick back down, only exposing his worst spot more, “Eudorastopit!” Rolling onto his stomach, he managed to push her wrist away.

“You are never gonna be safe now, you know that?” She propped herself up on her elbow, smirking down at the blushing man as he tried to recollect his breath.

“I know,” he mused, unable to help but smile as he turned his head away from her.

30 years.

It had been so long. Diego’s days in the 60s, upwards of 80 days, to be exact, had not been ideal. Of course, he’d met Lila, which… well, he wasn’t complaining about; but he wouldn’t say he was thankful for the asylum experience.

So when he’d gotten out and found himself residing at Elliot’s loft with his siblings, he was… happy? Even more so when he saw Klaus & Allison walk in the front door alongside Five.

He’d greeted Klaus with a mere “Oh, you are drunk.” Hardly even a greeting.

Allison noticed this. “Hey, Diego! Can’t say hi to nobody?” she later exclaimed across the room.

“Hi, Allison,” he muttered unenthusiastically, turning towards the stairs and away from his sister.

“What was that?” she called over to him, only for Diego to respond with a snarky middle finger and another indistinguishable mutter under his breath.

Allison cleared her throat, almost in warning, before opening her mouth when Diego still didn’t pay her any mind. “Hey! I heard a rumor that you stopped in your tracks,” she smirked knowingly. 

“Dammit, No! — Allison,” he growled, fearing that he knew what was about to happen, according to his previous experience with getting stuck by her rumors.

She made her way over to her brother, who was struggling to move his legs. Crossing her arms, she stood next to him.

After poking experimentally at his side, she relished in the giggle that left Diego’s clearly reluctant grin. “I missed you, Diego.” Allison moved to his stomach and dug all ten fingers into it, knowing that his tough-guy front wouldn’t last for long.

“Shit! Fuck!” He squeaked out a variety of expletives and let out another small giggle before cursing at himself and falling into hysterics, in and out of silent laughter, “Okay, stop! S-stop it,” he growled, opening one eye to glare at her, which had perhaps been the least intimidating glare Allison had ever seen.

“You know what to say to make me,” she smiled, raising her eyebrows, and continuing to wiggle her fingers over any part of his belly that she could reach.

“ACK! — H-Hi, Allison,” he choked out through his laughter before tripping backwards over a step, now able to move.

“Thank you!” Allison couldn’t hold back a chuckle at her ticklish brother.

“Jesus,” he muttered, shooting his still-grinning sister another glare as he made his way weakly up the stairs.

“Sure didn’t miss those manners,” she called behind him as she followed him upstairs, not without noticing the snickers from the other siblings, who’d been watching the whole time.

“Oh, Diego,” they thought to themselves. Oh, Diego.

[badsext]

A Comedy of Errors: Nathan Young x Female Reader

This was a combination of a request from my friend @elliethesuperfruitlover for a story where Klaus and reader are exchanging horny messages all day, then go crazy on each other when they finally see each other. That is combined with an anon request I received for a Nathan fic wherein the reader notices his boner and they have dirty filthy sex with loud moaning, biting, etc. I took some liberties and changed a few things to fit the narrative. I hope you like it 😚 Warning: Smut (of course)!

——————————————————

‘I had a dream about you last night.’ You knew a spicy little text like that would get a reply, even at 9:00 AM. And it was true, you’d had a filthy sex dream about Nathan Young and woke up horny as hell.

You pictured him zipping himself into that orange jumpsuit, then checking his phone and grinning like a jackass with his imagination running wild. He responded immediately, begging for details. But you loved teasing him. You were going to make him work for it, dropping hints and innuendos all day long.

As soon as the probation worker sent him home, Nathan headed for your place. But first a quick stop for something to spice up your evening for less than 20 quid. Double cream, a jar of maraschino cherries, a (stolen) bottle of vodka and ultra thin condoms that claimed to provide a tingling sensation. Nathan was very pleased with himself and optimistic about the evenings events. He became so distracted daydreaming about your naked curves that he ran smack into another pedestrian, sending the contents of his grocery bag toppling onto the sidewalk.

Nathan immediately let out a series of swears until he realized that this human obstacle was a wisp of a woman old enough to be someone’s gran. The impact had knocked her to the ground. He apologized and tried to help her back up, but his clumsy effort only made matters worse. The old broad was mortified. Help!,” she shrieked. “This man is molesting me!”

Nathan panicked, grabbing whatever was on the ground and stuffing it back into his bag so he could get the hell out of there.

After getting on the bus he noticed the cherry juice leaking all over everything in the bag and instead of condoms he had taken the old lady’s rash ointment. He sighed, abandoning the whole sticky mess and cutting his losses. He patted the bottle of vodka still safely tucked into his pocket. ‘Fuck it,’ he thought, sneaking a quick swig, then took a seat by the window.

By this time you knew he had already left the community center, so you sent him some extra motivation.

‘Hurry, I’m so wet!’ 💦

Nathan started to get hard and the fact that he was on public transport made no difference. His lust knew no such limits. ‘On the way’ 🍆

He looked out the window to see what street he was on and it suddenly dawned on him that he was headed in the wrong direction. He had gotten on the wrong bus! How could this get any worse, he thought, signaling the driver to get off at the next stop. He exited the bus like a shot and ran haphazardly across the street, his boner leading the way like a divining rod.

A car smashed into him going about forty miles an hour, enough to snap several of his important vertebra. Nathan heard the loud crunch of metal against bone before hitting the pavement and losing consciousness. Shocked onlookers started to gather and emergency services were called. Nathan expired in a pile of gore and debris just seconds before the ambulance arrived.

The paramedic examining him couldn’t find a pulse, so she administered CPR, but it was no use. He was pronounced dead on the scene. She had already called the coroner, placed a sheet over his body, and began filling out the paperwork when she noticed it. A conspicuous lump forming under the sheet. She dismissed it as nothing but a post mortem involuntary spasm until he sat up and threw off the sheet with a loud gasp. The paramedic stared back at him in shock. Nathan looked down at his erection, then back up to her and winked. “Thanks, love.” He got up and dusted himself off. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta get home to my girl, so I can fuck her brains out.” Priorities!

He arrived at your door panting and sweating. “Jesus, Nathan! You look like hell,” you teased, pulling him inside by his shirt. Your mouths converged, tongues fighting for dominance like a couple of territorial moray eels.

He tasted pleasantly of cherries and vodka. You pried your mouth away from his to playfully admonish him. “You’ve been drinking already I see...and why are you so sticky?,” you said, tracing your thumb over his lips and chin.

“I’m gonna make you sticky.” His breathy retort tickled your ear as his hand crept under your t-shirt to play with your nipple. You could feel yourself getting wet at his touch.

“Mmm.” You grabbed his stiff cock through his jeans.

He groaned, peeling your shirt off and eagerly cupping your breasts. “You wouldn’t believe what I went through to get here. A fucking quest!” Then he whipped his shirt off dramatically for emphasis, mussing his curls.

“Ooh. Did you slay a dragon?” You unbuckled his belt and pulled it through the loops with a snap, dominatrix style.

“No, but I died.”

You learned of Nathan’s immortality soon after meeting him. Following the initial shock you discovered it was a huge turn on. “Oh, fuck,” you gasped, gliding your hands down his chest. Nathan cracked a sly smile as you drew closer, kissing and nibbling his neck. You pressed your cheek to his to body to listen to his beating heart. “Was it painful?,” you asked, gazing up into his eyes, deep green pools of chaos.

“Excruciating.”

You looked back at him as if to say ‘no more fucking around.’ You led him back to your room and made him sit on the edge of the bed. You knelt down between his legs. “It looks like you need some T...” You unfastened the button on his jeans...”L” You unzipped them...”C”....You pulled them off along with his boxers. You began stroking his stiff cock gently with your fingertips. Nathan struggled to keep his cool. He propped himself up on his elbows to watch you work. His ragged breath betrayed him as you began to nuzzle him, dragging your lips and nose over his smooth, sensitive flesh. You licked his length and lapped playfully at the little drop of pre-cum at the tip. He whimpered. His eyes shut tight and his hands grasped the sheets.

Nathan let out a helpless moan as you took him into your mouth, bobbing slowly up and down, savoring him. You became lost in the act until you noticed Nathan’s breath change. “If you do that any more I’m gonna come,” he said with desperation in his voice.

You released his cock and raked your fingernails down the length of his thighs before standing up and sliding your panties to the floor. Nathan’s green eyes studied you, hazy with lust. He latched his mouth to your nipples, suckling each one them ravenously as his hand crept between your legs.

“Oh, no,” he said suddenly, his voice muffled between your breasts.

“Oh, no what? What’s wrong?”

“That old lady has our condoms.”

“Nathan, what the fuck are you talking about? I have an IUD....birth control. I got it a month ago.”

“So I get to fuck you raw?....unenCUMbered?” He smiled, and wagged his eyebrows.

You nodded with a giggle at his enthusiasm...”Wait, Nathan, was that a pun? You know that’s grounds for PUNishment.” He bit his lip, trying to hide his excitement.

You climbed on top of him, kissing him roughly, forcing his head into the pillow. Then silk ropes were used to secure his wrists to the bedposts crucifixion style. Nathan flicked his tongue at you defiantly as you straddled his face. “I’m going to teach you a lesson,” you said, lowering your most sensitive flesh onto his open mouth. You gasped at the exquisite feeling of his warm tongue on your clit. You ground your hips against him over and over, the rush of adrenaline filling your head. Using him the way he liked to be used. In this moment he existed only for your pleasure, your insatiable need. Your breath grew heavier, building to a sort of primal growl. Then the sudden pulse of your muscles, echoing the pleasure radiating from your core to every inch of your body.

After coming back to your senses, you realized you were squeezing the poor boy to death with your thighs. When you looked down Nathan was still. His neutral expression started making you nervous. “Nathan? Nathan?! “ You shook him. “Nathan?”

He opened his eyes. “What, love, I was just quietly basking in the afterglow,” he said, innocently fluttering his long eyelashes.

You hit him with the nearest pillow. “Jesus, Nathan I though you were...you know! I thought I might have...”

Nathan laughed. “You thought you smothered me to death with your fanny?”

You were embarrassed, but you had to laugh at the absurdity of the situation. “You are such a little shit,” you said with your hands covering your face.

“Yeah, but you love me anyway. Now, let me fuck that juicy little fanny before I go mad!” Nathan rolled on top you and searched your eyes for reassurance. Then he lined himself up with your entrance and moaned as he delved into your silky softness for the first time without protection.

You grabbed him by the ass and shoved him in as far as he would go. He started achingly slow, so you bit his chin and raked your fingernails over his shoulder blades. Nathan was always encouraged by a little bit of pain. He drove into you over and over, with vigor and purpose. You felt yourself unraveling once more. Your voice rang out at the peak of orgasm, then mumbled unintelligibly into his neck as you savored the rush of dopamine that flooded your brain. You watched his face contort as he came inside you. Nathan’s body suddenly tensed, then twitched. He made a new sound, vulnerable and uninhibited. He sighed contentedly and it looked like he wanted to say something. Of course you knew exactly what he wanted to say. You almost said it yourself. If he can’t bring himself to say it, here comes a joke, you thought, but Nathan just smiled shyly and laid down beside you. Then his hand crept nervously under the covers to hold yours.

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