#oh! maybe people trying to flirt with him for his money would… but most would feel that way in his shoes

[paimonial-rage]

DILUC AND 8 (their pet peeves) -- @milkstore

[Character Analysis Ask Meme]

What are Diluc’s pet peeves?

Lack of respect for service workers - Some may find it surprising seeing how rude Diluc is to the Knights of Favonius, but it’s true. Growing up on the winery, Diluc has seen firsthand the amount of work that goes into making wine and caring for the mansion. He understands the pride his workers put into their jobs. Not to mention his father raised him, not only to respect those under him, but to protect them as well. Is it really surprising then that he does not stand for those who harass his workers? To him, they’re the scum of the earth.

[blarshwritezz]

Yandere ceo × male actor reader. I imagine that the CEO is the owner of one of the biggest Hollywood agencies of all time and is a reference in entertainment, he is the cold type and gets to know you during an event.

The reader is an actor who appears in successful films and he is nice compared to the ceo.

I imagine Ceo would make indecent proposals to you and force you to marry him

Capital idea!

Yandere CEO x Actor Reader

Male yan x male reader

TW - general yandere behavior, slight NSFW abuse of power, manipulation

"What do you say, won't you be my husband? You know what will happen if you don't..." CEO!Yan whispered, his hot breath tickling your ear as his bruising grip on your waist tightened further. Is this really what your life has come to?

You never expected anything like this to happen when you met nearly two years ago. You were at a party hosted by your company to celebrate what a success your latest movie was.

It was your first time in a lead role, and you absolutely crushed it! It was a massive success at the box office, one of the greatest hits ever produced by your agency!

The CEO even showed up, much to everyone's surprise. You've seen him in the news and on interviews, but he was much more attractive in person. But also so much more intimidating, too. You swore just one gaze from him could freeze you over.

The first time you spoke was when he congratulated you on the role. Specifically, on using that role to fill his pockets with more money. He didn't seem genuine, not at all. He even made a few remarks about how, despite the massive success, you still could have done better.

You thanked him kindly and went off to enjoy your night. You wanted to keep that as your only interaction. Keyword, wanted. With other people, you enjoyed lighthearted conversations. You made sure to remind people that seemed to be giving you a little too much credit that it wouldn't have turned out even half as good without the entire team. You enjoyed a few drinks with your team, maybe a few too many.

Having gotten tipsy and way too brave, you approached the CEO once again. You just couldn't stop staring! He was hot, and you deserved some action after all the hard work you did.

You approached him, flirting a bit. Telling him how good he looked on that custom-tailored suit.

"You know, I look much better without it." He put a hand on your waist, sliding it down and giving your ass a good squeeze. "Why don't you come spend the night at my place? I can assure you, you'll get plenty more roles like this."

And the next thing you knew, you were waking up in his bed, your ass sore from the night before. Well, more specifically, you woke up laying on his chest with one of his arms holding you in place.

That definitely made you wake up. You couldn't believe it! Did you really sleep with your boss?! Sure he was hot and, now that it was coming back to you, really good in bed, but that wasn't what was important here! What if you lose your job over this?! And right as you were really starting to get a name for yourself too.

You carefully crawled out of his arms, trying to find your clothes so you could leave. You could only hope that he wouldn't remember the events of last night.

But oh he did. Like promised, you were soon offered a role in an upcoming movie. The lead role. And with it, a little note saying the spot was guaranteed to be yours...if you just stopped by his office. And if not, he'd ruin your career...

So it became something of a routine. You got incredible roles, and all at the price of your body...in interviews and when speaking to fans, you would always be congratulated and complimented. You really were an incredible actor!

But deep down you knew that you were most likely ruining someone else's chances. There were plenty of other talented actors in this industry that were actually putting in the effort to get parts like this.

But at the same time, he'd absolutely ruin your reputation and career if you didn't do what he said. He had the power and influence to absolutely end your social life, even if you left the industry.

Slowly, your encounters became more...intimate. More loving. He'd start taking you out on genuine dates, and on some rare occasions those dates wouldn't end with him pumping you full of his seed like usual.

He'd even visit you on set! The only issue was how touchy and clingy he got. He'd glare at anyone who got too close to you, even if it was for a scene. People definitely noticed, and rumors soon spread that you two were together.

You told him to tell the truth, to let everyone know that you weren't really together. And what did he say? "Why should I deny it? You're mine, and everyone should know."

Everyone definitely knew, and slowly they all resented working with you. They knew the only reason you got so many roles was because of your relationship with him. And they all avoided you like the plague, fearing what he might do if they got too close.

It kept getting worse and worse, leading you down a spiral of self hatred. He was the reason you were getting things you didn't deserve! But he was the only one who made you feel better, holding you tight and whispering sweet nothings in your ear. Telling you how much you did deserve it. How much you impressed him every day.

All that leading to this moment. Him holding you close as if he hadn't just massacred your throat, all while slipping a ring on your finger.

"Remember, if you say no, you won't have me to protect you from all those awful people. You deserve the world, my dear~"

And we got it! I don't know if you really wanted much nsfw or not, but I added some anyway.

[deadghosy]

Headcanon of singer user? Like they're in a popular band and the Slytherin boys are fanboys of them

A/N: hi Kai! Hope you like this one lol

Slytherin boys headcannons towards singer!reader

Ft. Mattheo riddle, Draco malfoy, Blaise Zabini, Theodore Nott, Lorenzo Berkshire

Mattheo riddle

He’s the type to like every thirst edit there is of you.

😕he’s a closet simp that soon takes pride into saying shit like “oh them? They’re hot.”

Literally will try to romance you, he’s a lover boy type of fanboy. But if you do notice him, he’s kicking his feet up and down when he gets back to Hogwarts.

Has a shirt that says “I 💗 [singer name]”

Tries to figure out what kinda men you like so he can just try to flirt with you.

He’s the type of fanboy to jokingly be like “I wanna be their microphone” every time you get up close to it.

He’s so silly!

Draco malfoy

Buys all the expensive merchandise😭😕

He would even rub it in a little girls face in Hogwarts, bragging how he got the best merch from your store

He buys a front row ticket and a back room permission as well😭😕

He’s the type of fanboy to be like “hm, they’re not all that…”

BUT LITERALLY HE WOULD RANT ABOUT HOW AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL AND HOW GOOD YOU CAN SING

His father had to scold him about using money

Blaise Zabini

When he’s walking in the halls, you best believe he has your songs playing already in his headphones.

Listens to your voice when going to sleep….

But honestly I feel him being a fanboy of you would make him save edits of you😭😕

Possibly Lorenzo had sent him a lot of your edits off of TikTok and it made Blaise fall inlove with you.

Definitely the type to just act like he doesn’t know you when literally he knows the next release of your next song and album.

Probably sings a song to himself when he’s bored.

He’s just built like that

Theodore Nott

OKAY PLEASE BEAR WITH ME, I FEEL LIKE HE WOULD TRY TO HAVE A Y/N MOMENT WITH YOU😕😕

I mean cmon reader, he’s hot, you’re hot. So why not hook up🤷🏾

Broski literally follow you on all platforms, mostly on instagram. See, if he never knew how to speak English. He would for you.

He’s gotta propose in some way in the future lmao.

He definitely stole of Enzo’s vinyl records

He’s not giving them back either

Lorenzo Berkshire

Number 1 fan! And fan boy!!!

He got your albums, discs, you name it.

Boy was hoooked when pansy had showed him your songs.

Goes to your concerts and of course not every one, he’s not that crazy…

But he definitely is the leader of your fan club, definitely wears it with pride

People worship you and him because you are the amazing singer, while he is the king of knowing so much about you.

He’s most definitely a narwar fan😭😭

WATCHES YOUR INTERVIEWS LIKE CRAZY

He probably has merch of you, maybe posters…

[daenysx]

Okay blurb req for old money!Aemond who is ALSO a model for really expensive brands and his gf is a photographer👀 inspired by the photoshoot and that one specific blue leopard print pic🙂‍↕️🤭

oh my god i hope i did well, thank you, rue !! <33333

modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader

cw; modern!aemond being a hopeless romantic, suggestive, kisses, no but he's really so in love it hurts, photographer!reader and model!aemond can be a new favorite wow

"are you sure this is professional?"

aemond has no shame, honestly. you don't think you can be expected to be 'professional' when your boyfriend looks like he'll ruin your entire existence by looking like the most charming being in the entire universe.

his blue eyes sparkle in the latest photos you take, a stark contrast with his platinum blonde hair. flowy strands make you want to pull aemond to yourself enough to give him a good kiss on his neck as your fingers travel in his hair. maybe you can do that when you get to be alone with him. oh, you'll definitely do that when you're alone.

"i believe i'm extremely professional." you murmur, holding his hand to make him pose the way you want. "if you stop being so distracting, it'll be even better."

he smirks. a small quirk of lovely lips, he's handsome and he knows it. he leans into your space and your hold on your camera tightens. you will not kiss him. you can't, there are other people here, and this is business. you take a step back.

"i'm only doing what you tell me to do." he says like he's the most innocent man. "you can't say i'm not being good."

you give him a small smile. he's in the mood for playing.

"i didn't say that." you say, quietly. "come on, a few more for me and we'll be done."

aemond fixes his posture, your one hand still holding his. "of course." he says, coolly. "you know i can actually be good for you. as many as you want, you'll have it."

you lick your lips to control your face expressions. not the time, not the place. just like you say to him, only a few more and you'll be done.

the clothes he's wearing make aemond look taller as if it's actually possible. you admire his poses, his confidence and his awareness of how good he looks. he turns his head for another picture, his eyes following your every move. it's like a wordless conversation between you two.

"can i get one with a smile?" you ask him, your hand directing his last pose. "not too wide, just- a subtle one, please."

"i'm afraid that's not possible if i'm going to give you a smile." he flirts. "maybe you should let someone else take the photo if you need a subtle one."

you hear two girls giggling at the corner. he really thinks he's so fun, doesn't he? it's his world here, he knows how to charm his way and he certainly knows how to be a flirt. you're thankful he's already yours, it would be impossible to handle him otherwise.

after another fifteen minutes, you're all done. you go next to aemond, leaving your camera. people around you move quickly to clean up the place, and fix all the mess that has been made. aemond takes your hand to brush a kiss on your knuckles. his eyes are warm this time, so clear under this lights.

"what do you think?" he asks. "good?"

you nod softly. "probably the best in a long time."

"kind of hard not to." he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you closer. "i had the best photographer."

you give him a kiss on his cheek but that's all. he's been teasing you all day long. "do you flirt with all your photographers like this, mr. targaryen?"

"absolutely not." he answers, cheekily. "my flirting skills are reserved for only one person."

"i think you owe me a drink." you tell him. "even working is easier than trying to deal with your incessant teasing."

"we'll have dinner first." he says, kissing the side of your head. he doesn't say, but he's tired. "think of what you want to eat when i'm changing, okay? i have a few options if you can't decide."

[myntrose]

ೃ⁀➷partners in crime ︻デ═一

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ft: Alastor x gn! reader

summary: It's another night at the hotel. Everyone is lounging around the shared space, or sitting at the bar. With a boost of confidence (and a few drinks) Angel finally asks the burning question everyone had : How did you and Alastor meet?

cw: demi! Alastor, established relationship(married), Alastor and reader meet when they were alive, reader is an assassin , killing and mild gore (it's alastor yall), a lot of petnames, no use of y/n, no beta we die like men

a/n: it's the way alastor got me smiling and kicking my feet. he got me to break my 1 year hiatus LMAO. also, I am aware that he's ace. I myself am somewhere along the demi spectrum, so this fic is purely for comfort n coping. if you don't like it, pls ignore :,D

wc: 1.5 k (1,469 words)

‧͙⁺˚･༓☾────────────────────────────────☽༓･˚⁺‧͙

The hotel common was filled with low gentle music and idle chatter. Vaggie and Charlie were on the couch, talking about everything and nothing. Nifty was running around chasing some poor roach. Even Cherri was here, with Sir Pentious attempting to flirt with her once again.

Husk was behind the bar, in ordinary fashion. Although he was mostly listening and doing his job, he would occasionally chide into the conversation the other two residents at the hotel were having. Angel was in the middle of telling you about how much of a headache Val was, while you gave him you condolences. It seemed like the only person missing was the radio demon himself, who was probably in his tower, making a new broadcast.

"Speakin of which..." Angel, who noticed Alastor's lack of presence, noted "I got a question for ya toots. How is it that tall, red and creepy managed to bag you as a partner? You're sweet and all, I get that. But how did you even meet-"

The loud slam of drinks caused the peace within the hotel to halt . Husk shoots a stern glare towards Angel, almost to warn him, be cautious about asking question's about Alastor and his darling, you never know if he's listening.

"It's alright, Husk" You send him a sincere smile. While he would never trust your husband, he can't help but believe your words.

"Well, Angel, let's start with this. If you've ever wondered why I'm down here in the first place, it's because of the occupation I had when I was alive. That's actually how I met Alastor."

Oh, maybe you were a thief and were trying to steal something from Alastor. Or maybe a detective that was on the case to solve his murders. Or maybe-

"I was hired to assassinate one of his targets."

oh.

You couldn't help but laugh at Angels' reaction. Sure, you were kind to those in the hotel, and definitely not as threatening as most overlords. He, and most people you met in Hell, just assumed you committed some mundane crime and got the unfortunate eternal punishment .

Taking a small sip of your drink, you start to recollect the unforgettable night that would define your current relationship.

It was supposed to be like any other job that you were given. Your employer would hand you a file, you would find the target, and get paid in return. Maybe it wasn't the most ethical way to make money, but hey, you knew how to kill so you made it work.

You had followed your target into the bar, while waiting away in the corner. Though your eyes were focused on them the entire night, you couldn't help but feel another pair of eyes on you.

It was probably some random patron in the bar, you guessed. It wasn't for another hour when you noticed that your target had left the vicinity.

The streets were dark, with the occasional street light every block or so. It was perfect place to finish your job. All you needed was for your target to turn into some alleyway, and as quietly as you followed him, you'd quietly go for the kill-

Quietly. Hold on, why was it so quite?

Looking up the street, you noticed that what was once where your target stood was now empty. There was no way he outran you, given that you would have heard his footsteps. To the right of you were the woods, maybe he took a detour?

No, everything felt wrong. Every single thought in your brain was screaming to run, to grab your gun that was hidden beneath your coat, to get out of here-

"Careful my dear, we wouldn't want you getting hurt now, would we?"

A cold blade found its way to your neck. Two very disturbing facts became known to you. First, was the fact that the blade was already stained red. And second, you were about to be the second kill of the night.

A million thoughts ran through your mind. Was this how you were going to die? How fast could you grab your gun? Would your employer be pissed off that you died in the job? With your eyes shut closed, you waited for the knife to make contact.

"Now now, there's no need to be so scared my dear! My, you look like a deer in headlights!"

...what?

Opening your eyes, you're met with the mysterious man who just had his weapon on you seconds ago. He seemed vaguely familiar, probably having seen him at the bar you frequent.

"It seems that I've caused you quite a scare. Do know that wasn't my intention. I just wanted to see for myself this new assassin I've heard so much about! You've caused quite the gossip, my dear. Makes good conservation."

You continued to stand in silence, with the initial shock of almost dying wearing off now. As mad as you were that you got caught, you were equally confused on just who this man was. With some more listening to his voice, the answer popped into your mind.

"You- you're that new radio host! Alastor, was it?"

Alastor's smile grew at the acknowledgment. "Indeed I am! Glad to know you've heard about me."'

Had anyone walked into the conversation you two were having, they would have assumed it was one between new acquaintances. In which one has a knife in their hand, while the other has a gun.

"You see, my dear, I've heard quite a bit about your line if work. While I am more than capable of... dealing with others, I propose that we work out some sort of deal. One where you can finally stop working for that employer of yours, and actually make a profit off your talents."

Alastor put out a hand, waiting, watching to see how you'd respond. It's been a long night for you, and you had a feeling that this wouldn't be the last time you saw. Plus, if working with him meant you'd finally have to stop answering to your boss, then why the hell not. You take his hand, before agreeing to this proposition.

"...and since then, we've been business partners. Our relationship kind of just happened after a few moths."

It was nice to look back to when you first met your now-husband. Looking around the bar, you noticed that you weren't just talking to Angel. At some point, unbeknownst to you, everyone at the hotel had come over to listen to your story time.

"Well toots, I figured you had to be some sort of crazy to date smiles, but I guess it takes one to know one." Angels says while taking a shot, still reeling with that fact that someone as kind as you was a killer. Head nods and murmurs of agreement spread within the group.

Before you could say anything, a pool of dark clouds appeared to your side. From the shadows, the very man you were taking about stood before you.

"Hey, Al."

He faces you with his signature grin, before turning to the rest of the residents.

"It seems that I've became the topic of conversion while I was gone! It's quite interesting to see how interested you all are in with me and my dear's meeting."

The hint of annoyance in his voice was entertaining, to say the least. You place a hand on his shoulder, barely hovering above it.

"Aww, come of Al! They just wanted to hear how we first met! Besides, it's a fun story to tell."

"If "fun" means almost killing ya for the first time, I'd hate to know what you guys did when you started dating-" "Shut up Angel!"

You answer a few questions that were asked before everyone eventually returned back to their previous endeavors. Husk and Angel eventually sit around with the others in the common room, leaving just you and Alastor at the bar.

"It's kinda funny, now that I look back at it."

Alastor doesn't say anything, promoting you to continue.

"That night, I almost turned down that job. I was painfully tired, and all I wanted to do was go home. It's crazy to think that we wouldn't have met had I not pushed myself to take the job."

Anyone who knew Alastor would know that him asking for a partnership was simply outlandish. Hell, Alastor himself questioned why he was seeking you out in the first place.

No, underneath he knew. He knew from the first time he saw you. It was a different time from when you both officially met. When he saw you, someone so seemingly innocent, skillfully take down a man twice your size, he knew that he had to meet you.

"Well, mon chéri, it's good that you did."

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny, on the run from the GIW decides to take shelter in Gotham because if the GIW have any sense they'd never set foot in there.

Even if Batman and the JL agree with thier opinion on ecto entities (as evidenced by their lack of speaking out against the anti-ecto acts) Batman was notoriously territorial and would have issue with a wildly incompetent government organization throwing missiles around his city all willy-nilly.

With that being said it was probably best for Danny to wear a disguise. Sure, they didn't know Fenton and Phantom were the same person yet but Danny Fenton suddenly turning up in Gotham after going missing in Amity is certainly going to raise some eyebrows regardless of the necklace he had that jammed his ecto-signature and made him untrackable.

Danny started off by going blond. Its something he's always wanted to do and now with ghostly shape-shifting powers he doesn't even have to worry about frying his hair or dying his eyebrows to match. After that all he needed to do was part his hair down the middle, add a lip ring or two and maybe a bit of make up.

Danny stared at himself in the mirror. He looked like a completely different person.

A completely different and very attractive person. He looked good. The newly blond man threw on a green jacket and went out to explore the town. He did not expect to literally bump into the Tim Drake. The Wayne adoptee just stood there mouth opening and closing comically. Did he offend him? Crap. He had promised Jazz he would stay off of the radar of the Waynes and the bats specifically and here he was angering one of them.

Danny decided to book it before it became a scene, ignoring the lovestruck Tim's crys for him to wait.

Back at his apartment Danny quickly changed his look to red hair tied back into a two inch low ponytail, green eyes and freckles that unbeknownst to anyone else was made up from the lesser known constellations.

The coffee at this Cafe smelled amazing! Too bad Danny wouldn't get to try it because the next this he knew freaking Red Hood was behind him asking to talk. Our favorite ghost boy wouldn't be embarrassed to admit he let out a small squeek before bolting out the door yelling, "I'm not even a criminal!"

It took Jason a few seconds to process that the guy he had tried to flirt with ran away in terror. Crap.

Day three and four were blissfully Wayne and bat free, though he did find out that Tim Drake and Red Hood were looking for his two false identities. Joy.

Day five he met the stabby Robin who very valiantly beat up two people who had been following him. Danny didn't even notice he was being followed and thanked the bird for saving him. Danny, who was shape-shifted into a very pretty girl at the moment, offered to buy him something to eat as a thank you. "Danielle" insisted and Robin allowed it. Danielle never noticed the slight pink on Damians cheeks as they went over to one of Damians favorite restaurants.

Day seven he had went out as blondie and got confronted by some girl named Barbara. She was nice and managed to convince him to come to a Cafe with her. He told her his name was David and he ran away from his parents with the help of one of his friends family members and that he was Jewish, which was true...except for the David part. He learned that if you wanna keep your story straight keeping to almost truths was your best bet. She in turn told him about Tim and how he's a friend of hers-uh oh- and that he's been looking all over for him.

Danny-David- tells her he's sorry but he didn't mean to offend Tim and doesn't want any trouble before laying down enough money to cover his half of the bill and the tip and booking it out of there

This repeats with most of the family trying to flirt with him or adopt him into the family when he's out as Danny.

Bruce Wayne approached Danny when he was waiting to board an elevator, "Hel-" was all the billionaire could get out before Danny cut him off "Hell no." And then he just got in the elevator and pressed the close doors button and was gone again.

[httpskuzuu]

Moral

I'M BACK

Yandere!Chuuya x Reader

English is not my mother tongue, sorry for the mistakes

summary: Chuuya is not a good person, and neither are you.

tw: angst¿, mention of murders, toxic relationship, low self-esteem, reader is not the best person

Day 4.

Night began to fall, and you saw yourself reflected in the windows of your favorite convenience store. To say you looked dead would be too kind. Your hair was in disarray, as if you had never combed it before, not to mention your dark circles and vacant eyes. If you were mistaken for a homeless person, you would understand.

This time with Chuuya was…. Well, difficult. Now you feel like a bit of an idiot for letting yourself be fooled, you should have been more careful. You're not oblivious to the bad people in the world, you just didn't think Chuuya would be one of them.

You were dating a mafia executive! And you didn't even know it. You only found out recently, when you saw those blood stains on the shirt you were going to wash. You wished it had all been a misunderstanding, that you were exaggerating and it had all remained an anecdote to laugh about in the future. You wished you hadn't trusted this bastard so much, but now look at you, half a year of your life down the drain. No home, no job, no money.

And you still miss him. God, you feel pathetic. You shouldn't have moved in with him soon after you started your relationship, nor should you have quit your job because he could support you. You try not to be hard on yourself either because, come on, the man “of your dreams” had offered you a life of luxury for literally nothing, you didn't even have to do housework because he was willing to do it so you could live like royalty.

Oh god, how you miss him.

You get out of the store before you get kicked out of there and go back to your friend's house, who you were stealing practically all the money from.

Day 7.

After your long day of looking for a job in all the existing stores, and having no luck in any of them, you arrive at your friend's house to find several policemen at the door. You fear the worst, and it is the worst.

Your friend is dead, or rather murdered. You are told that the scene appears to be the work of the Port Mafia and your blood runs cold.

After half an hour, the police call you because the Armed Detective Agency wants to talk to you, but you're already in a bar, and you don't want to talk to anyone. You hang up directly, even though it could get you in trouble.

Do you feel sad for your friend? Not really. You didn't have much of a relationship, he was a good person who had to get involved in your misfortune. Do you feel guilty? Hell yes, of course.

You know about Chuuya's questionable attitudes, you noticed them from the first moment. You weren't blind. As soon as someone flirted or even hinted a modicum of interest in you with your boyfriend (now ex-boyfriend, you remind yourself) present, you never heard from that person again. You always ignored him, what's more, you were flattered because, if he was that possessive of you, that meant he really loved you, right?

And who else would love you the way you are.

It was a bad idea to leave Chuuya, it was a horrible idea. You should have foreseen this situation, you didn't know specifically that it killed people around you, but that doesn't exclude you from your responsibility. Innocent people died for getting close to you.

If you had talked to Chuuya from the first day you noticed his behavior, maybe things would have been different.

You have another drink to take your mind off that part of you, hidden in the darkest corners of your head, that keeps feeling flattered by him. You'd like to say that thought is small and because of the alcohol, but you'd be lying to yourself.

Chuuya, the man you've loved the most, has killed for you. Sounds like the characteristic that any teenager with hormones going through the roof would wish for when thinking of my ideal boyfriend or girlfriend. Someone who will kill and die for you.

Chuuya would do it, without thinking about it.

No one has loved you like the redhead did. No one has treated you like royalty, nor cared as much about you, nor treated you with as much delicacy and love as he has.

Do you really care about the innocent lives he takes, or are you just faking concern to make yourself feel better?

Day 10.

It's foggy and cold. Perfect weather for the occasion.

You're on your way to Chuuya's house, all dressed in black. You have just left your friend's funeral. You still can't understand why his family invited you.

Your feet are heavy, and you feel that at any moment you will vomit up the nothingness in your stomach. The subject of barely having enough to eat because you spend most of your money at the motel where you are staying is not pleasant. You feel weaker and thinner, you remind yourself to weigh yourself on the scale in the bathroom at Chuuya when you arrive.

You miss the comforts your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend, for now) offered you. You put morals aside, you were never the best person anyway. The people who pointed you out as someone who is selfish and only cares about himself were right, they were so right.

You should have realized your nature earlier, instead of trying to focus on grief and guilt.

Sooner than you thought, you were planted in front of your man's door. You didn't want your hand to shake so much when you ring the doorbell, but it does.

Not even 10 seconds pass before you finally see Chuuya. As perfect as ever, with that captivating gaze that managed to distract you from any subject in just seconds. You regret not dressing up more for him.

He also has slight dark circles under his beautiful eyes. You feel relieved to know that you weren't the only one suffering from the breakup.

“Y/N?! How come you're here, I-” He interrupts himself with his own words, and you can't help but smile at the scene.

His hands want to touch you, to hug you and know that you're real, but he seems to regret it before he even touches you. Oh, if only he knew that you have the same desire to feel his hands again.

Chuuya gives a sigh and nervously averts her gaze, then returns it, her expression more serious and determined.

“Look, I'm really sorry for everything. I should have been honest with you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me, and you don't know how much I missed you, and-” You wonder if he's practiced his speech. Before he can continue, you pounce against his body to kiss him with your mouth open.

Chuuya doesn't take long to keep up with you, to trap you in his arms. It's clear to him, he won't let you go again, no matter what he has to do to stop you.

Oh, how you had missed him.

I thought about it ending up in something nsfw, but my asexual ass was afraid of success.

[redbatchedcumbermayned]

I have recorded different versions of my name, and the last time I was told it was Haynrix and I was like, really? Haynrix? - Interviewing Chris Tester part 3

We contiune talking about the transformative power of fanworks, a bit more about romancing Heinrix, how Heinrix is pronounced actually, what a dream come through project would be for Chris and why a stage production of Crime and Punishment was his most memorable work to date and his newly discovered interest in playing D&D.

Part 1 of the interview

Part 2 of the interview

This is the final part of the interview. Thank you so much for reading and listening! (the audio quality is not spectacular but tumblr limits uploads to 10MB). If you quote or reshare, please quote me as the original source.

F: It's very transformative. You take a game and you get your own stories after the game or with the people you interact with. It's very creative. Because Heinrix is very much an archetype, as you said, he has this duality about this very authoritative man with so much trauma underneath. There is a lot to explore, and that speaks for Olga's writing as well, because only a very well written character would draw you in like that into a story.

CT: I mean, it's a crazy balancing act, definitely. And at any time, it could close off, you shut him down, or he shuts you down. And you're like, Oh, okay.

F: And it was incredibly funny that the first romance lines straddled the line between workplace harassment and flirting. And he is so unnerved and then it doesn't like to cordon you off and say, well, you were too aggressive. Game over. 

CT: Yeah.

You can switch to this closeness path like in a real relationship, you are maybe very flirty, very teasy at the beginning, and then things get real and you get real and it changes. And that was very dynamic. I never experienced that before. BioWare writes great romances, but they are often very one note in their games.

CT: And there's still the kind of like, okay, so are we sleeping together? Yeah. Or we do not. All right. No, okay, great, fine. God, I had to go through all the different fucking options just to go like, Is this, is that, no, no, okay, fine, right, yeah. So in terms of nuance and dynamic, it's you've got your issues over there, but regardless, can I just say the right thing? Uh, or not, you know, or be pure, or whatever. Garrus was always a favourite for me.

F: Oh yeah, Garrus, Garrus is great.

CT: Yeah, yeah. I'll be honest I didn't really appreciate quite how subtly all of the pieces are put together until I played through bits of the game and watched bits of the game afterwards [this relates to Rogue Trader]. Because there are so many different moving parts, but also so much is recorded out of order, it's very difficult to get a full appreciation of the whole, and it's the credit of the directors to just be able to give you enough for you to get it in two or three takes, because we gotta move on because time is money is time. 

And so that's kind of crazy, where you've got to just act in faith in the moment and trust that the people who are listening on the other end feel as if they're getting what they need. Obviously the more you record, the more you get a sense of what the character is about and the palette and the playfulness and all of those kinds of things. But because there are such a multitude of choices anyway, no one can explain to you exactly the context of what it is because that's all such a movable feast as it is anyway.

F: That's a huge credit to voice actors to still get it right in three or four takes.

CT: Well, the aim is to give them options so that they can trial it out and be able to have a playfulness about things. It's always nice when you go like, I'm just going to try this different take on how this might traditionally be read as or something, and then you maybe hear that in the game and go like: Oh, okay, that's a little bit of whatever. 

Because quite often you'll probably be told to read a line no more than three times, and the first time that you read a line, that you read it out loud is the first time that you read the line at all. So, you don't read it in advance, and sometimes that goes in. It's normally the second or third take, I would say, but that depends very much on the voice actor. Because quite often, the whole point is to be quite good at sight reading, and sometimes there's a spontaneity in the reading of something for the very first time, which might give something a little bit unexpected, or a little bit fresher. 

And then you realise halfway through, there's a word I have no idea how to pronounce. Is it von Valancius? Von Valancius as it's written or von Valen and you're just like, the hell? Okay. And then you need to go back.

F: Or his name actually, because as a German, we have Heinrich as a first name. So is it Haynrix? Is this Hainrix? But we can say it's Low Gothic, so it doesn't matter.

CT: I have recorded different versions of my name, and the last time I was told it was Haynrix and I was like, really? Haynrix? Okay. Sure? But I've not had a definitive conversation about that, so I don’t know whether or not they change it or, or whatever.

F: I settled on, it's Low Gothic and not the German version and it's fine because that's a fantasy language. It doesn't matter. And I know from other voice actors that sometimes you don't get any directions on how something is pronounced.

CT: Quite often we're just taking an educated guess. I mean, they're very good in terms of some pronunciations, but if no other character is saying this word except you, then there's probably not a guide for it in which case you just make sure that you record it somewhere. So, it's consistent. So, if you're saying it more than once, at least you're saying it wrong consistently. So that becomes the new, right?

F: What was your most memorable work to date? Stage or voice acting?

CT: Stage or voice acting or whatever? God, I would say one was a production of Crime and Punishment. There you go. It was a three-person adaptation of the massive book really condensed into about 90 minutes, essentially. Quite a radical adaptation, but it was a beautifully written adaptation, and I think I did it probably about 2017, 2018. That was wonderful storytelling because it had so much of the original flavour in it and also this ambiguity of character. A much more ambiguous character than someone like Heinrix. Someone who is so eminently fallible and flawed, and yet trying to find a through line through it and a making of sense and the justification for the reasons why people do bad things. That is pretty iconic for me as an experience. 

I do feel lucky that a lot of the things that I'm able to explore in the video game or in the voiceover world generally are completely new and unexpected things. Whereas on stage, unless you're doing a lot of new writing, the vast majority of the time, it's a role that you're familiar with or have seen or have heard about. It's pre-existing. Whereas with some of these video games, you get to create that whole original world or character and that kind of stuff. Which is why if anybody asks me, what role do you want to play? I'm like, the role that I don't know exists yet, and Heinrix is very much one of those. Like, I had no idea and neither did I have any idea that it would develop in the way that it did. 

But the whole process itself is a lot of fun and you work with very cool people to tell a completely new and original story. But having that ambiguity, having that tension within the character, every actor has to find that for themselves anyway, just to keep creatively engaged and alive, but have that so vividly running as an undercurrent and for it to be able to go in different ways, that's such a cool kind of thing. I'm just so up for more of those kinds of opportunities. Maybe hopefully in the future, we'll see.

F: Has voicing Heinrix opened any doors? Did you notice an uptake in offers?

CT: I think it means that a few more people probably know who I am, and that's cool. A few more people. Yeah, it's definitely been referred to. Other than that, I don't know. But it certainly doesn't hurt being involved in such a high profile and well respected, well-loved game. I mean, for me as well, because I've done various different aspects of stuff in that world. That doesn't hurt. 

I love the whole Warhammer 40k universe, at the same time I don't want to just be like, I'm a 40k actor and that's all I do because that world also probably doesn't need just another white middle-class man in it, even if that is like 70 percent of the world. Like you say, they're trying to broaden it out and diversify it and necessarily if it wants to get to a bigger audience and have a healthier ecology on so many different kinds of levels. So, I don't want to go all in on just that, even if it's a very rich world. So, it was a real pleasure. 

F: Would you want to broaden your repertoire into radio plays, because I know on your LinkedIn, you write, you're the voice when Cumberbatch is busy and listening to you, there are undertones of Benedict Cumberbatch in your voice, and Benedict before he became really popular, he did something like Cabin Pressure, which is so fun.

CT: Yeah.

F: Would you be open to doing radio plays like that?

CT: Definitely. I've just recently come from a voiceover conference in the UK and did a couple of workshops and that reminded me of what the work is that I want to actively seek out. And there's a lot of audio drama stuff floating about, a lot of that is available via social media or is operated in the U.S. as opposed to in the UK., though there are some great ones in the UK. as well, and it's tricky to know why and how to validate some of those things. So, it's something that I would love to explore doing more of as well as, you know, you can do these audio drama things, which are kind of like shorter versions of audio books, almost essentially with not so many voices. And I think those medium and short form ways of storytelling would be lovely. It would be great because I'm not right for a lot of video games. 

I don't think I'll ever be actually a very prolific video game actor if that makes sense because I'm okay at shouting and I can play some monsters and I've got a couple of accents in the bag and that kind of thing in terms of doing voices. People will say it's about the acting Chris, it's not about voices, but doing some voices and being able to nail certain things there are people that are brilliant at that. But there are people who have probably a wider palette of voices than I will ever have. 

I never started out as a voice actor. I'm very much an actor who uses the voice, and I'm trying to broaden that out a little bit more as I keep on going. But I want to open myself up to more different types of stuff to be creatively fulfilled. The prospect of going into a recording session and screaming “grenade” and “bang” is not very fulfilling. I did that for a few games, and then I'm done with that. Like the money's not good enough for me to do that. I mean, never say never. If the money does become good enough, then we can talk. But you push your voice and it's a different kind of acting, I'll put it that way.

F: So, last question. What would be a dream come true project for you?

CT: A dream come true project? Probably something entirely original that I can't imagine. I would love to be able to work on an audio project where I'm working with other actors in real time. I would love to be able to work with most of the cast in Rogue Trader, for example, but I’d love it for us to be able to have dialogues where you're actually responding to each other as opposed to insert A, B or C here, that kind of thing. Because that's the one thing I kind of miss so much from the audio side of work is you getting something unexpected from the other person and then riffing off it. You have to self-generate as a voice actor that a director will go do you want to try it like this? Or maybe like this, it's supposed to be funny. Try it dead pan, that kind of thing.

But quite often that kind of spontaneous element of discovery only comes from when someone gives you a line in a way that you really didn't expect, and maybe it makes you laugh, when it's supposed to be tragic or whatever, those kinds of things. The biggest thing I miss about stage work is when you're working with an actor at the top of your game and they raise you up to their level. It's terrifying, but in the best way. Some actors can do that effortlessly because they're so in the moment, because they don't know what they're going to do next, even though they can find their light and make sure that the audience is still seeing their brilliant acting at the same time. Clever, clever bunnies. That feeling because they don't know exactly where they're going, you're kind alive to the moment in a way that quite often you're not, and if there was a way to be able to replicate that in an audio way and a long form storytelling way, then that would be cool. 

I've just started playing a little bit of D&D and I don't know if I'll ever get good at that, especially in terms of like, so I've got to come up with words. Oh my God. Whereas I will never watch a D&D playthrough for four hours on YouTube myself, personally, life choice, I can start to understand the appeal of that because there's an element of that spontaneity and playfulness, but in a group. So, if there was a way to do that with actually scripted drama, I'd be all in on that. That would be amazing. Or some kind of hybrid. So I don't know exactly what that is, but that kind of thing would be quite cool. 

F: That's what the BBC did with Cabin Pressure. I attended one live recording and it was just amazing. You have all the other actors [apart from Benedict Cumberbatch] that are household names. And to see them act and how little takes they actually need for the lines and everything is amazing.

CT: Yeah, there's an appreciation of the craft, but it's also the fact that it's not into a void. It's not like, okay, we've done three. Is that okay? We're onto the next. I think in many ways it can make the work much easier, because you're using your imagination, but in a different way, because you're operating with a stimulus. And that's always exciting.

F: And good D&D is just like improv theatre.

CT: Yeah, exactly.

F: Really good players are spontaneous. Just very creative.

CT: That should be celebrated and I think harnessing more of those kinds of things would be fun, because in all honesty, still probably about 60, 70 percent of the work that I do is in the corporate and business sphere. That's just because of how I sound. I didn't go out to court that work particularly, but in terms of the stuff that pays the bills regularly, that's the kind of stuff that I do. Even then, you're trying to find levels of playfulness or colour so that you're not just coming over with: “in a world where you can trust a big corporation to take your money.” So, there's any kind of nuance or subtlety to that, that will be a good thing. So that's the kind of stuff that I crave as a result.

F: Thank you for your time.

CT: Oh, my pleasure.

F: It went by so fast. We went over time; I still have a lot more questions.

CT: Oh, sorry.

F: No, no, no, no, no, no. That, that's, that's absolutely fine. Thank you.

[fumifooms]

Dandan x Asivia

Dubbed dansivia. Confused as to who either of these are? Here’s a Dandan comp and Asivia wise this post is close enough for now

There is a brave visionary on ao3 and they’re so right

Ok first of all let’s address the theory:

Dandan is indeed the only Laios party member not pictured here (besides Chilchuck himself but we saw he didn’t like her which would contradict this anyways). I keep wanting to add "that we know of" or some other caveat but honestly not even no, it’s never implied or mentioned they had yet another party member and that makes sense since we saw the party’s inception right up to its current party composition.

… So… Mystery solved right out of the gate? I dunno, it feels weird to me to claim Dandan hates Laios, but if he kept it under wraps enough or reasoned with himself about it I could see it. Laios and Dandan were coworkers from their gold peeling days, and so when Laios left to try a career in dungeon diving Dandan joined him.

They seem very standard coworkers that get along well enough to me, far from skulls emoji energy, but yeah there is a case to be made on both overt strong dislike and repressed strong dislike ends. But maybe the true beef started after he left the party even, especially if he fancies Asivia and kept up with the party’s drama that went down with her, though the chart does imply it was the work dynamic while he was still in the party because of context. But, believing that Dandan likes her and Asivia considered getting with him like the other men of the party, Asivia would have literally sidelined Dandan to pursue Laios. And Laios doesn’t even realize her attempts at seduction? Ok yeah the hate is plausible nvm. Also we can keep in mind that this is Chilchuck’s chart and he could have more insight on Dandan’s feelings than the average coworker since he’s his friend. It def fleshes him more out with implications. He’s professional he keeps unnecessary shit to himself. It’d be weird to me if the relationship chart was made without Kui thinking it through, or retconning it, it is the canon we get so it’s interesting to ponder. Kui giving us secret romantic drama for free <3

Speaking of what’s not free. Ok maybe Dan does dislike Laios, do business introductions really cost money… I mean I respect the hustle but. So Dandan is heavily implied to be the one to introduce Asivia to the party. The only other mage was Marcille and well we know how that went. "A real cutie". Yeah. I bet. 👀

This is the most interesting dansivia part to me, they did meet previously to the party, both doing what they do best, networking. Dan helped Asivia find a job, how did they meet and how did that go? What if she had an infamous reputation already, how much did they get acquainted… There’s a lot of leeway for fun here

Gorgeous hustling but lazy manipulator that seeks a fortunate husband x slight womanizer hustling & hardworking poor guy that’s been around in business for too long to be played… Both work a lot but like to take it easy when they can. Tavern flirtations and having met while networking and "I can hook you with a job" (staring and smiling too much) and "Oh Dandan, you’re so capable and knowledgeable about the Island, could you help me out~"

Manipulator hustler seductress x laidback hustler flirt… Social butterflies, streets smarts in different yet similar ways… Observant x observant………. She’s very harsh and drops people/her damsel act at the first second she can’t get something out of it anymore and I think he’d be so into that. Dandan liking strongminded women. Women who kinda play dirty. Makes him respect them and want to pursue them help…

And like, takes on Asivia differ nowadays but I do need her to mean this shit for this, this is what she's unabashedly about. She is just a woman trying to make it in this world but working people’s the name of her game. Whatever reason you give her, she was taking advantage of Laios and trying to get a marriage with any decent profitable guy she could. She knows what she’s doing and she doesn’t look the least bit remorseful. A girl who knows what she wants and chases it, rawr ⬅️ Dandan voice

They both fall for each other but neither can admit it because they know it’s just temporary, she’ll go look for a well-off tallman husband eventually. Messy situationship go. Can they even have a good ending together. It’s all only ever nice in the present moments… She’ll leave he can’t offer her anything but himself and a very humble lifestyle, she’ll leave she can’t settle for that she won’t, he knows that and it’s part of why he liked her in the first place. Oughhhhh

Ohhh to be underdogs, settling for a humble life & being content with that vs unapologetically ambitious and chases that life and comfort she seeks, which in turn makes him admire her…….. But even if she inspires him to chase what he wants, she can’t give it to him…………..

Putting this on blast bc they’re great thoughts

Because I’m me I’m trying to make them reach a happy long term ending together and it’s not working… Which is more fun tbh. I shall ponder this puzzle…

Casanova Dandan is so important to me now. Chilchuck’s in a separation slump & faithfulness oath to the wind but Dandan, good friend dandan? He’s living he’s thriving he’s pulling

I want fics of them meeting & networking. He’s very up to the news in the dungeon goer community… All I’m saying is I can see Dandan bartering for a shot with her in exhange for information or helping her out find jobs, knowing she’s after guys to marry too 🤭 I think they should flirt in a tavern. I think they should make eyes at each other over glasses and exchanging business convos and leaving it all in the implied and unspoken

Dansivia is getting too real to me

The fics are fun go read ‘em

[bree-cheesy]

Guess who’s in a mood again???

Jschlatt x reader

This was longer than I wanted it to be 😭 oh well, just more for y’all

Imagine also being a streamer and having a little crush on Schlatt. You say little crush, but everyone except him knows you’re like in love with the man.

Recording a game with him and a few other people, trying to hide your obvious staring at his camera. Kinda hard not to since he got a haircut that made him look downright sinful.

Blushing whenever he laughed at something or whenever he helped you with something in the game. You were filming with Ted and he definitely noticed how flustered you were because he kept sending you messages teasing you about it.

Schlatt was definitely not clueless. He could tell. After he died in the game, he decided to take the chance to send you a message. Nothing too raunchy, but definitely something to make you blush and smile.

Jschlatt: You look cute right now.

When you died you looked at the message and blushed a bright red. You covered your face, acting like you were just yawning and he quickly sent another, grinning.

Jschlatt: Make you blush? You’re adorable.

You excused yourself to the bathroom when the last person died. They said they’d wait for you. Schlatt frowned a little cause you hadn’t responded to any of the messages he sent. He thought he maybe overstepped a little.

Opening the discord app on your phone, you finally responded.

You: Stop making me flustered 😩.

You walked back to your office and continued on with the game. After the recording finished, you got a text.

Jay: Come over???

You: How would I do that?

Jay: Plane

You: You have plane money??

Jay: Yep

And that was that. The next weekend you were on a plane to Austin. He had some filming to do so he couldn’t pick you up, but he met you at his house.

Before you even had a chance to move your stuff into his spare room, he grabbed your bags and pulled them into his, making you follow in confusion.

“Didn’t fly you here for just a friendly visit, toots. We’re gonna do a lot more than what friends do.”

And he was very true to his word. That night he took you on a date to a very expensive restaurant that you were amazed he got reservations for. He even took you shopping before hand so you could get something nice to wear since you didn’t pack anything super fancy.

He looked so handsome. Navy blue suit, red tie, stupid grin on his face the whole night. You felt like royalty.

And oh how he made you feel even better when you got home. You were both a little tipsy so it was a lot of flirting and touching on the drive back home. Leaning over in your seat to give him little kisses on his cheeks and neck.

Getting home and getting pushed up against the wall so he could properly kiss you. He made you dizzy and had to practically hold you up.

Whispering dirty little things in your ear while pounding into you, eyes rolling back into your head as his cock hits just the right spot inside you.

After making you cum twice, he pulled out of you and jacked off while your mouth was wide open, tongue sticking out. His head was thrown back and he was letting out the most sinful noises.

Swallowing all his cum and finishing off with a make out session that may have turned into three more rounds……

Ending the night with ordered in dessert and wrapped in his arms while watching a movie. Little kisses to your face and head while he murmurs little praises to you.

— Bree <3

[krizariel]

Inspired on an episode from HIMYM - because is my background noise show:

Tim hooking up with Jason thinking he is a hooker because whoever introduced them (probably OG Bernard) was playing a prank on Tim for being a prude/too puritan and is not like Tim had much time to find a date for the wedding he had to go to. He is still friends with his ex but it hasn't been that long since the break-up and its awkward and now they have to go to the same wedding since they are within the same group of friends.

Bernard: You should totally bring a date

Tim: what? who am I gonna bring? I'm too busy as it is and I'm not going to bring a random guy from grindr

Bernard: Eh, just bring an escort

Tim: I'm not THAT desperate.

Bernard: Pfft, what's the big deal, no strings attached, get to show everyone you are doing just fine, no one has to know, you leave with your dignity AND a good time

Tim: You cannot be serious.

Bernard: Oh I'm so serious. What, Tim Drake can't hook up with a hooker now?

Tim: Just no, and seriously shut up. I'll see if I can find someone and I have nothing to prove I don't care to make Steph jealous. Plus I'm sure she won't bring a date.

Wedding comes, Tim shows up and Bernard is with his date and another very handsome man.

Tim pulls Bernard to the side because what?!

Tim: Who is that?

Bernard: Oh, you know, found you a date *wink*, thank me later.

Tim: With a hooker!?

Bernard: What, too handsome to be a hooker uh? No one would ever suspect anything

Tim: That's beside the point! I had said no-

Bernard: Geez, give it a try no one said to sleep or do anything with him? He is just a companion tonight, whatever else happens is up to you

Tim: I know that! But-

Steph: You guys ok there?

Steph and her date had joined Jason and Ariana (Bernard's date) and they had come looking for Bernard and Tim.

Jason: Hey, you are way cuter than described.

And he winked at Tim. He was way too handsome, towering the whole group.

Tim at first is kind of forced to go along but it would be awkward to reject Jason since he was already there, and it was not his fault plus damn he looked stunning. They hit it off just fine, in fact it was great, Jay was a total nerd, they spent most of the night talking, drinking and flirting, and Tim started to feel all giddy and more emboldened to just flirt back. Is not like he will see him again right?

The event was at a hotel and they were going to leave their own ways. At first Tim was reluctant because well, he has never done this before and maybe this is going to be really expensive but… what the hell, he hasn't been with anyone for some time and he really finds he likes Jason even if he is a hooker and might not actually like Tim. So he invited Jason to his room to which Jason just said: Was starting to think you were not going to ask. That would have been no fun.

They hook up, sex is amazing, 100/10 would do it again … , and Tim leaves a few $100 bills by the table and just leaves a note with his number saying call me. Tim thinks well… at least maybe this way he knows Tim is still interested to see him again. Tim feels crazy because what has his life come to… and no, is not like this will be a Pretty Woman kind of plot, Jason probably has other people to see and WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM!? He will totally not tell anyone about this and certainly won't tell Bernard how did it go.

Well, Jason never calls him, Tim doesn't have his number, so he can't call him. Not long afterwards Tim has an accident on his bike, the paramedics come get him and Tim sees Jason there. At first Tim thinks maybe he is hallucinating because he totally has a concussion but-

Tim: Jason? what are you doing here?!

Jason: My job?? Didn't Bernard tell you I was a paramedic?

Tim: WHAT? AREN'T YOU A HOOKER!?!?

Jason: What.

Jason has half the mind to not punch Tim because he is having flashbacks of having such an amazing time with this rich kid that seemed nothing like the rest but then he wakes up alone and with money by the bed table. So insulting.

Jason: I'm a fucking PARAMEDIC… now shut the fuck up before I fucking make your injuries worse and lose my license.

Anyway, they clear things up (and Tim cant look at any of the nurses in the eye because they start giggling). Bernard, Ariana and Jason work at the same hospital and Ariana and Jason are good friends. Bernard invited Jason with them, telling him he had a good friend of his who is really cute but pretty lonely and can't find a date since he barely has any time to get himself out there. Jason shot him down at first with thanks but no thanks, but Ariana (Bernard's gf) told him Tim is actually really nice. Since Jason didn't have any plans he ended up accepting.

Jason: So you slept with me…thinking I was a hooker?!

Tim: …. Listen I wasn't going to do any of it, I swear but you were so funny, witty, smart, loved talking to you and in just a few hours I found I really was starting to like you, you were amazing… and didn't matter what you did for a living. I genuinely wanted to see you again and now I'm babbling and not making any sense I'm sorry-

Jason: The fuck is wrong with ya?… after another string of curses

Tim: I- … I'm sorry, I know this is a mess and I understand if you don't want to see me again-

Jason: No, I was talking to myself because for whatever reason I find ya oddly sweet.

Jason: But first, I'm going to do something for myself and slash Bernard's bike tires :)

Tim: Oh, can I join you?

Jason: Sure. It's a date Timbit ;)

[viviennevermillion]

ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ᴍʏ ᴡʜᴏʟᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ, ɪꜰ ɪ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴀᴛᴇʟʟɪᴛᴇ

✧ ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: sampo koski, despite his flirty demeanor towards you, wasn't expecting anything when he tried to get you to help with his newest scheme. thankfully, you decided to be a little bold today.

✧ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ: sampo x gn!reader, flirty banter, first kisses, sampo going from suave scammer to being a flustered mess, reader is a menace, 4.9k words

✧ ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: satellite — nickelback

✧ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: making out (not intended as suggestive)

Sampo Koski was a difficult man to get close to. Despite his overly friendly, even flirty, demeanor; he always held his cards close to his chest. They say that still waters run deep but you found that with your unlikely friend and his questionable scams, it was the exact opposite. The more he talked, the harder it got to discern what was truth and what was merely a red herring. You knew there was much more to Sampo than he let on, yet, unfortunately, it was hard to even get a glimpse behind the facade.

His attempts at scamming you were always very on the nose, something you could never see yourself actually falling for. And although you weren't 100% sure of your hypothesis, you felt like he knew that. He knew he'd have to try harder to get you on board with his schemes but he didn't. There was a flicker of hope inside you that maybe that meant that somewhere along the way he had started to genuinely enjoy your company.

After the crisis regarding Belobog's future was resolved, most of your communication with Sampo happened over text; though he'd definitely seek you out when he had an excuse to. You wondered whether the longing was obvious in your eyes. Whether he saw that you waited for a sign that he felt the same.

Most of your friends would have lectured you that loving Sampo was a bad idea. That the only thing he wanted from you was your money. Perhaps some amusement when he felt bored. But you felt like there was more to him. The few moments where you got a look behind the mask, or at least were pretty sure that you did, made you curious for more. You couldn't deny there was some chemistry between you. Most people would have rolled their eyes at his continuous attempts to scam you. But you found that most of them were harmless when he threw them at you and you felt like he wasn't stupid enough to think they would genuinely work.

Whether there was any truth to his words or not when he referred to your companionship was still unclear to you but he had a way of making you feel like you truly were just joking around with an old friend. So why not play along and see where it goes?, you thought to yourself. Over time, you had started to indulge him a little; talking to him in the same way he did. You started to reciprocate his attempts at flirting and teasing; calling him a friend and terms of endearment whenever he messaged you. Ever since then, he had started to reach out to you more and more. You wondered whether, perhaps, below the shady exterior was a man looking for connection with someone he could be honest with. Or maybe that was just your wishful thinking that what you had now could evolve into something more.

"Hey fam. How are you doing? Would you be interested in a business proposal? 😇", you heard the beeping of your phone as you stepped out of the shower at your place, checking the screen to find that you had received a message from Sampo. You didn't even notice you had started smiling whilst reaching for the towel. As soon as you had dried yourself off and put on some fresh clothes, you typed a reply.

"Sampo, my dearest, I'm never interested in your business proposals, you should know that by now", you sighed and shook your head, "but feel free to tell me anyway. At least they're entertaining. 😁"

"Oh come on now!", you could clearly imagine the text in his voice, "this one I promise you're going to love! 😇" Somehow I doubt that, you chuckled. But it couldn't hurt to ask what it was.

"Well... uh... it's a bit of a doozy", he started and you already expected another wild idea of his, "but the details are as follows: I need you to smuggle this package out of the restricted zone!"

"And why, pray tell, would I do that?", you asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Look, I know you and Gepard are on good terms and you're friends with his sister so you have special connections~", he texted back, "it would be a lot easier for you to get into the restricted zone than it would be for me! You just need to frame it right! It's a valuable item and the profit is going to be BIG, I tell you that. 💸"

"I'm not interested in profit", you replied, "sunshine, you know I care about you, but I'm not sneaking into a military zone for you." This is usually the time when he starts getting desperate, you chuckle, watching the little 'Sampo is typing' notification on your phone. You were right.

"Oh come on! Pretty please? It's just a quick in and out...", you read his reply, "think of it like a date, except you're smuggling things instead of having dinner with me. It's going to be a great time!" You snorted and broke out into laughter. "How exactly is that like a date? 😂"

"Well, we're spending time together in a romantic location, full of excitement and with a little bit of danger and adventure!", he tried to reason, "we'll be bonding emotionally while doing something that's uh... a little bit of a crime; but no biggie! I'm telling you, it's going to be fantastic! ❤️"

"Your date idea sucks 😭", you replied, still chuckling. "Don't be mad", he begged, "please? Do it for me? Your old buddy Sampo? Your pal? I'll never ask for anything again ever, I swear it!" You smirked. "You said that the last 20 times and then you asked for a lot of things, honey", you reminded him. You didn't mind. It made him reach out to you over and over again.

"Okay, okay, fair point but I'm serious here!", he pleaded, "you know, the guards wouldn't even see you! I really thought this through! All you have to do is deliver this package to a mysterious man in a coat who will be waiting for you behind the fence and you'll be golden. It's easy and quick!"

"You know, 'mysterious man in a coat behind the fence' really does not make this better", you laughed at his silly proposals as you texted back, "actually that makes it worse. 😂" "Why?", Sampo asked, "I'm not saying it's not a cliché but if you think about it, the setting is really quite romantic? A dark secret alley perfect for kissing, a mysterious stranger, a night-time rendezvous... you can't deny that's the stuff movies are made of. 😇"

He's impossible, the smile wasn't going to leave your face anytime soon. "The stranger isn't even you though, so how is that a date with you?", you asked.

"Well, I never specifically said it was a date with me. Wait- does that mean you'd go on a date with me?!", you read his message, hoping there was some truth to his surprise about that idea, "either way, look, the stranger in the coat is going to give you this really cool thing called a... well, it's a really cool thing. And once I find out what that would be, it's totally going to blow your mind and you'll think it was worth it! Promise! For real!"

"Okay you made me laugh, I give you that 😂", you confessed, deciding to ignore his remark about the date for now. No reason to get this serious with him yet when he wasn't willing to meet you halfway. But as time went on, you felt as there really was no stranger in a coat at all and he likely made the whole thing up. The only question was, why? Was he waiting for a sign from you as much as you were from him?

"See? Now we had a laugh together and you feel much better about the plan! I just know you are! 😌😊", he sent the message. What you didn't know was that Sampo was smiling just as much on the other side of the screen. After all, making someone he cared about laugh was the highest honor for a fool like him, wasn't it?

"No. ❤️"

"Pretty please? 🥺"

"Let it go, darling. I'm not doing it. Find someone else to smuggle your package."

Sampo pouted. "How can you do this to me? When I really needed your help you just... turned away from me", he texted back, "and yet the next time I have a great idea I will be willing to share the profit with you again. You know why? Because you're my friend. But it's fine. I'm fine. I'm going to go sulk in a corner now... 💔"

You rolled your eyes and just sent him a teasing 'have fun! 😘'.

"You really don't care at all, do you? 😔", you read his reply. "I do, but we both know you're not going to sulk about a failed scheme", you reasoned, "if you want to, I can come over and give you a hug, but no crimes. ❤️" Your heart was beating faster as he was typing his reply. You wondered what he would think of that idea, even if he just thought that you meant it as a joke.

"...you would do that?"

"Or I'd show up with the Silvermane Guards. No telling, really 😇", you teased. "You wouldn't do that! We're best friends!", he whined.

"Only one way to find out! 🙃❤️"

"You're so mean... 😭"

Perhaps it was the fact that this had been going on for months now and you were both dancing around the idea of addressing what exactly was between the two of you to the point where it was starting to get embarrassing. He'd always message you, looking to scam you but never fully committing to it and he seemed absolutely delighted at the fact that you were still willing to talk to him every time. But this time you decided to push your luck with him.

"So should I come over or no?"

You waited in anticipation. He seemed to be hesitating for a moment; likely trying to gauge the probability of you actually dragging the Silvermane Guards to his doorstep and whether that was worth the risk. But alas, you had never done such a thing before, so why would you start now?

"...Yes. I'll be waiting", was his answer and your heart started beating rapidly at the realization that you were actually going to see him right now.

"Oh my... you're really willing to risk me bringing the guards just for a hug? I feel special 🥰", you teased. Sampo let out a disappointed sigh in his room at the Goethe Grand Hotel. "Just hurry up before I change my mind... 😔", he gave in, hoping you weren't already aware how much you made him weak in the knees and how he wasn't expecting you to ever go along with his silly plans; yet would be up for such a demand if it came for you. After all, he had snuck into a Silvermane Guard restricted zone before. He would do it again for you. Not that you would ever ask him for such a thing though. You weren't him, after all.

Sampo got lost in his thoughts so much, that he didn't even notice how the time passed. Only your knock on his door snapped him out of it. You were waiting for him outside, fully oblivious that he was a little nervous, his cheeks heating up as he hoped that you would not see it. His prayers fell on deaf ears.

You smirked slightly as he opened the door and you could see a faint blush on his face. "Hey bestie!", you greeted him with a joyful smirk on your face, "surprise, I brought no guards!" Sampo didn't think that you would hand him over to the authorities but he was relieved about the confirmation nonetheless. He gestured for you to come inside and shut the door behind you.

"It's nice to see you", he greeted you, this time being genuine. You could tell immediately, which made you think that there was something inside him that urged him to let you know this. You reached for his hand, gently pulling him into your embrace to give him that hug you promised him. Sampo froze up at the feeling of your sudden touch and you could feel his heart beating fast in his chest.

After a moment of getting used to the sensation, you could feel him relax and wrap his arms around you as well. He closed his eyes when you couldn't see his face, focusing on your fingertips running up and down his back. His heart fluttered. Who knew his little attempt at a scam could evolve into this?

"This is nice...", he admitted, his voice a lot quieter than you were used to, which caught you a little off-guard, "...I didn't think you'd actually come." He let go of you, secretly wishing he could make that embrace last longer without making things awkward.

"Did you think I was joking?", you wondered.

"...A little bit, yeah", he sighed.

"Why?", you asked, your nerves giving you a tingling sensation as you realized that this was new; that you had overstepped a line that had been separating the two of you for months and it might just change how you approached each other completely. "Well, I'm used to the rejection by now", Sampo chuckled. You rolled your eyes. "Rejecting your scams is a lot different from rejecting a hug with a friend", you reasoned.

"You know, you're right", he shrugged, "I hope you're not mad about the scam. It's a compulsion at this point." You laughed. "It was funny, so I forgive you", you winked at him, making his heart skip a beat.

"So anyway, about my newest scam-", he joked and you playfully hit his shoulder. "Don't test your luck, Sampo", there was a glint in your eye that was challenging him. "Wait, wait hear me out", he smirked and you could tell from his expression that he was hardly serious. You didn't know that it was because Sampo Koski was actually really nervous about the whole thing and using the topic he was most familiar with to try and distract you from how flustered he was. You were here now, you had hugged him, he had let his guard down in front of you; even if just a little bit... what happened now?

"I just really need you to smuggle that package..."

"You just tried that one, hun. Don't", you spoke softly and brushed a strand of his dark blue hair out of his face, your hand remaining on his skin, gently caressing his cheek, "why don't we just sit down on the couch and you can rest your head on my lap, hmm? Does that sound nice?" You had gotten this far with him already; you had gotten impatient without even noticing it. You were ready to place all cards on the table if Sampo was willing to follow. Besides, should he reject you, you could always play it off as a joke. Thankfully, he did not do that.

"I won't say no to that", he smiled back at you and let you take his hand as you lead him over to the hotel room sofa. His awkwardness when he placed his head in your lap didn't fly over your head. You started running your fingers through his hair, hearing him let out a relaxed sigh as he leaned his cheek against your stomach, still wondering how he could have possibly ended up here. At this point, he just let it happen. Your touch felt so comforting. "This is nice", he admitted, closing his eyes to enjoy the feeling of your fingertips carding through the strands of hair. "Do you deserve this much affection?", you asked teasingly, reminding him of the many times he had "tried" to scam you.

"Oh I know I don't", he laughed, a proud smile on his face, "but somehow I'm getting it anyway. Funny how that works out for me." You smiled down at him, thinking how adorable he looked laying in your lap like this, just letting you work your magic. "One of the many miracles of life, I suppose", you shrugged, letting out a chuckle.

He remained in your lap for a while, just focusing on the sensation of your touch. In all the times you met Sampo, he had never been this quiet for such a long time. He remained so still that you were wondering whether he had fallen asleep. You got your answer when he raised his voice again after about 15 minutes of this. "Can I say something?", he asked and you raised an eyebrow. "When do you ever NOT say something?", you laughed, "usually you don't even ask."

He chuckled. "Alright, yeah you got me there."

You were wondering what he had to say that was so different; perhaps so genuine, that he had to ask for reassurance that it was okay to say. "I just wanted to say... I'm glad you're here", he tried to keep his cool, not noticing how he was awkwardly fiddling with his fingers, "it's a little sad that you rejected my business proposal, but... uh... this is a... nice alternative. I don't really know what I expected when you said you'd come over, honestly." You smile down at him, noticing how difficult it was for him to keep his mask on when he was in such a close, vulnerable state with you and trying to say something he actually meant. You had no doubt about that now.

"Hey... I have a question", he continued, his eyes fluttering open to meet yours; heart beating fast when he saw you gaze at him with such a soft, almost loving, expression, "why are you so chill about the scams? You're the only person who never seems really annoyed about it. Everyone else is pretty much done with me when I try that. Which is fine, I don't need them to like me, I just need their cash... but you're different. Why?"

Your heart was growing warm at the fact that you were now close enough; comfortable enough; that you felt like you were really talking heart-to-heart with him, without any ulterior motives or distance between the two of you. "Well, I didn't really take the scams seriously", you shrugged and thought about his question, "and they were funny. I like talking to you... despite your questionable run-ins with the Silvermane Guards." He laughed softly.

"I honestly never had the feeling you were even serious about the scams when you tried them on me", you further admitted, "the ones you sent me just seemed a little too silly for you to actually believe they'd work on me."

"Heh. You're right about that", he sighed with a smile on his face as you started gently touching his cheek again, "with you, I guess I was mostly just messing around. Seeing what I could get away with. Getting to talk to you more..."

The last one was almost a whipser, but you heard it either way.

"So... uhm... can we stay like this for a while longer?", Sampo asked with a hopeful look in his eyes. You were worried that if you backed away now; he might decide that he should have never let you get that close and gotten so attached and you might not get another chance to be this close to him again. So you decided to push it a little further.

"I have a better idea", you suggested, gently removing his head from your lap so you could lay down beside him, "can I wrap my arms around you?" You were nervous too, though you were, surprisingly, keeping it together better than Sampo was.

"Y-you want to cuddle?", he asked for clarification; disbelief written on his face. You nodded and he opened his arms to you. You snuggled up to him, nuzzling his neck. "W-what are you doing? I- I mean... I'm not complaining", he stammered, shivering slightly. That was the moment Sampo's defenses broke. The mask had fallen and you could clearly feel the heat radiating from his cheeks. He was at your mercy now, just hoping you wouldn't ridicule him. How did I let it get this far?, he internally cursed himself, but making no attempts to back away. Curiosity got the better of him.

Meanwhile, you were having the time of your life. Seeing the usually so confident, "tall, blue and handsome" Sampo Koski like this was an opportunity you couldn't miss out on. "I didn't know you could lose your cool like this", you teased with new-found confidence, now sure you had the upper hand in this situation, "that's interesting, don't you think?"

Sampo was struggling to keep his heart rate down. "It's not like I'm nervous or anything!", he pouted, his head spinning from the unfamiliar sensation of holding you this close to him, "I'm just... uh... um... I'm just enjoying this. I'm enjoying it very... uh... a-a lot. Yes."

You had a triumphant smirk on your face. "That's good to know, Sampo", you purred and turn his head to face you by grabbing his chin gently. Your lips were now inches apart and Sampo just looked at you with wide eyes. He could feel your breath on his skin when you spoke. "I think I found a new method to turn down your scams", you chuckled.

The close proximity made his heartbeat skyrocket. "Uh... yeah... I'd say this is one of those... methods... as one might say", he replied absentmindedly. Wherever his mind was, it was certainly no longer on the conversation topic.

"What's wrong? Cat got your tongue?", you teased, your lips brushing his slightly as you spoke. The fleeting touch of your lips on his made his brain basically short-circuit. Sampo felt his limbs grow heavier and he tried to form words but he could only keep looking into your eyes.

You wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him closer. "Do you still want me to smuggle that package through the restricted zone?", you asked, referencing the scam from earlier. Sampo nodded. "P-please", the word was a mere whisper, his voice had cracked. "Please what?", you asked with a smirk on your face. Was this what they call Schadenfreude?

"Please... just... forget about the scam", he gave up, his breath hitching in his throat, "just kiss me." He looked at you with pleading eyes that made your knees weak and made you wonder how you actually managed to get Sampo Koski to completely lose his composure. "There we go", you whispered affectionately and smiled, closing your eyes. It's rare to hear him say 'please' about anything that isn't a scam, you thought. Your lips finally met his in a soft but also passionate kiss.

Sampo melted into your embrace, sliding one of his hands to your cheek to hold your head close to his as he kissed back. Your tongue clashed with his and you rested your hand on the exposed skin of his waist. Sampo pulled you closer to him, his muscles relaxing as he accepted this new situation. You smiled into the kiss, gently plucking at his lower lip with your own. You pressed a couple of soft kisses to the corner of his mouth, causing him to smile as well.

Sampo still had his eyes closed, trying to capture your lips again but you had instead decided to move on to his neck, gently trailing kisses over his skin. He shuddered, his hand traveling to your shoulder to draw circles on them with his fingertips. "How are you feeling, love?", you asked, your hand placed firmly on his chest so you could feel how fast his heart was beating in his ribcage. Sampo tried to gather his thoughts but the only thing he managed to get out was a faint "yes" he whispered.

"Well, that's not a feeling now, is it?", you smirk, repeatedly kissing a sensitive spot you found on his neck. His hand squeezed yours, holding it tightly within his own. "Please stop teasing me", he whined, trying to blow a loose strand of hair out of his eyes. He put a finger under your chin, lifting it so he could reach your lips again. He kissed you once more, losing himself in the sensation. You kissed back passionately, burying your fingers in his hair that was already messy from him having been laying here for a while. Every time you had to break the kiss to take a breath, Sampo was already pulling you in for another one.

"...love you", he whispered against your lips between kisses. You weren't even sure he noticed that those words slipped out of his mouth, but they made your heart flutter and caused you to pour all your love into the next kiss. Sampo's lips were trembling and he felt a tingling sensation in his stomach and his heart. He felt like he never wanted that kiss to end. "Don't stop", he whispered softly, moving in for another taste of your lips.

You indulged him for a moment, then pushing him away gently, still with a teasing smirk on your face. "You know? I'm actually quite hungry", you remarked, getting up to make your way over to the kitchen counter, "you got anything in the fridge?"

"...you're killing me", he whined but let out a desperate chuckle, holding his hands over his flushed face. His skin felt like it was on fire. He could hear you chuckle about his predicament as you opened the fridge door. You inspected the ingredients in there, your eyes falling onto a leftover slice of pizza with banana pieces on it wrapped in transparent foil. It's okay, we're not here to judge, you reminded yourself with a facial expression that indicated that you were most definitely judging.

"By the way", Sampo heard you call out to him, "I love you too." "Did- did I say that?", he asked, feeling another wave of heat rush through his cheeks. "Sure did. I just got to kiss you for the first time, don't tell me I'll have to ship you off to the nursery home", you laughed, "what do you want on your sandwich?"

Sampo waved you off, not interested in thinking too hard about your question. "I don't know, a vegetable or something", he mumbled, his thoughts still all over the place. You looked at the vegetable selection and found that you had teased him enough for today. The chili peppers would have been a bit too much.

You brought your sandwiches over to the couch and handed him a plate. Sampo looked at the food and noticed he was actually really looking forward to eat it. "You make the best sandwiches", he complimented you, sitting up and pressing a kiss to your cheek. "You haven't even tried them yet...", you raised an eyebrow and he insisted that he didn't need to try them to know that. He just trusted you with that. He's so sweet, you caught yourself thinking and mused that it was probably time to talk about the elephant in the room.

"So...", nervousness settled in your heart again, staring at the sandwich rather than looking him in the eye, "do you think we can... you know... make this official? Be a couple? Go on dates that like... don't involve sneaking into restricted military zones and committing crimes?" Sampo let out a laugh. "I thought the restricted zone was a wonderful date spot", he pouted, earning a chuckle from you, "but yes. I'd love that. I love you. I mean, I already told you that... apparently... that is a thing that happened..."

His thoughts trailed off again. Right now, Sampo's approach to everything was pretty much "you know what? sure." and you felt like Qliphoth could break through the window and start singing one of Serval's songs in Hook's voice and your boyfriend wouldn't even question it.

"Did you skip through the other 4 stages of grief or did I just not notice them?", you joked, taking a bite out of your sandwich. "I don't know, I think bargaining was quite prevalent", he chuckled and leaned his head on your shoulder, "but being with you could never cause me grief anyway..."

"So", you continued, "are you going to tell me about your newest scam?" He smiled at the question, finding it curious how you didn't mind hearing about his shenanigans. "If you don't interrupt me this time", he nodded and you shook your head, indicating a pinky promise with your fingers.

"You see, there's this ugly boot I found in an alleyway that I'm trying to sell as a powerful ancient relic..."

You listened to Sampo tell you his future "business plans" and as soon as you had both finished your food, he snuggled up to you, resting his head in the crook of your neck; his breathing slowing. You two just talked for a while, more honest than you had ever been with each other and it felt good to finally know that Sampo loved you back.

He fell asleep in your arms that night, dreaming of your kisses and the non-criminal dates you promised him.

[bloomingdarkgarden]

My unabridged and uninvited Bridgerton season 3 thoughts live as i binge-watched until midnight last night:

fuck this show is euphoric escapism soap opera and idk what whimsical crack they put in it but it always manages to make my heartrate go insane. My expectations were low, maybe because ive been starved for any tiny crumb of this whimsy idk but i feel atrociously fed so here we go:

colin u are acting like an instagram influencer and we all see thru u bye.

Nicola is the most stunning person on television 50 shades of aqua move over boys I'm first in line for her dance card.

I would sell my soul to satan to have a cigarette with Lady Danbury in her afterhours tea room.

ngl the resurgence of the season 1 orchestrals is BEAUTIFUL and hitting harder than the new covers.

cressida's hair needs a dedicated gallery space and im completely here for her humanization she is a ruthless sad hoe and i understand. creloise good morning.

pen and francesca bonding over being introverts>>>>

pen is the people's princess for real, bookish as hell and socially awkward until she has 3 glasses of wine and then she's real as fuck. mood.

OH MY GOD THE KISS THE NIGHT GARDEN THE SHEER STARVATION his hand on her cheek and he's looking at her like he just touched god fucking hell i had to rewind and watch three times.

Pen trying to impress Debling "I LOVE BIRDS' no she did not I spit out my wine. yes penelope yes. don't let anyone tell u you don't have game honey.

omg balloon drama lol what is this shit peak bridgerton nonsense.

benedict has the personality of a rug on someone's back patio, polite and unnecessary. the reason why his scenes are so offputting every season is because he has been depicted as Goofy from A Goofy Movie no i have not read the books but boy they are gonna have to pay me money to digest him as a love interest i swear to god.

ugh penelope is the most relatable female lead in this entire series i am rooting for her SO hard.

thank fuck lady featherington is willing to discuss penetration with her daughters they now stand a fraction of a chance of surviving the world. lady f for president.

i found francesca's placidity / passitivity about the next 50 years of her life v frustrating at first but she grew on me immensely and am looking forward to more of her screentime.

debling has kind eyes and i will be sad if he's truly jilted... bravo netflix for once again making me care about the beta characters.

this danbury man flirting with lady bridgerton hello sire you are gallant as hell, wake up lady b.

colin's entire world being ruined for penelope is actual nirvana.

THE CARRIAGE SCENE THE CARRIAGE SCENE I WILL NEVER STOP LOVING THEM I WILL NEVER STOP I LOVE THEM IM INSANE ILL NEVER STOP holy shit. colin asking if the carriage can just keep going and pen laughing because that's a gd ridiculous thing to say is peak friends to lovers i felt their friendship in that moment and im aching with it ugh they are besties with hormones GOD i will never. stop. loving. them idc idc idc.

can't wait to watch 75 more times goodnight.

[kookieminsuga]

The Wolf and his Coyote - Part 3

Part 3 for you! This one is a little longer! Enjoy :)

Summary; Jungkook is the leader of the biggest biker gang in Korea. He is never interested in people unless they can benefit him in some way. That is until he runs into a girl who is the only person who appears to not be afraid of him. New to Korea, Amalia is an artist who spends most of her days working on her comics at her friend Minhyuks diner who also happens to be Jungkooks favourite hang out spot. What will happen when Jungkooks, a man who's heart seems to be frozen in ice, interest is peeked for the first time since he can remember?

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

Pairing: Gang leader jk x Tsundere, artist Amalia

Rating: 18+ do not interact if you are a minor!

Word count: 2.5k

Genre: Biker gang bts, action, romance, there will be smut down the line, angst, violence, humour.

Warnings: Flirting, Mentions of past, Mentions of smut (if you squint), sex dream, biting, marking, bruising, poverty, immigration.

Amalias pov:

Big hands run over my body, starting from around my neck, down the side of my chest. I gasp as I feel the sensation of lips and cold metal on my navel, making it’s way down, lower and lower, ever so slowly.

I feel myself losing control as I beg for more, running my hands through fluffy raven black hair. All I can think of is the feeling of those plush lips on my skin. Not even the fact that I don’t know who’s lips they belong to. 

Then I feel it on my inner thigh, teeth sinking into my skin and bruising it. I yelp at the sensation, still confused about the situation but not caring one bit due to the overwhelming pleasure. 

Just as they start approaching where I want them the most, I suddenly jerk up, blinking the blur out of my eyes. A dream. That’s all it was. 

I sigh as I sit there, in my bed, covered in sweat. 

“It’s been too long Lia.” I say out loud to myself. 

After shaking myself awake, I finally get out of bed. My deadline is coming up and I didn’t get much work done yesterday because of that thug at the diner. Today is going to be different. I still feel bad for Minhyuk tho, getting attacked in his own place. Maybe I should bring him some breakfast to cheer him up. 

Finishing up my morning routine, I start cooking my breakfast, making sure to make extra for Min. I know how much he dislikes the food at his own diner, tends to find it too greasy for his liking. Home cooked meals are what he lives for.

I pack up the food once it’s done and start making my way out. It smells delicious, I hope this cheers him up at least a little. 

As I step out into the alleyway, I turn the corner and head down the street. I notice the owner of my favourite ramen shop outside setting up his signs for the day.

“Hi Mr. Park! How’s your morning so far?” I say stopping next to him.

“Oh Lia! Good morning! It’s going great so far, how about you?” He responds.

“Good! Same as usual.” I say with a laugh. 

Mr. Park has been kind to me since I arrived here. When I first got here, I didn’t have much money to my name so all I could eat for meals was food from the convenience store. I always stopped by the shop tho, the smell of the delicious ramen pulling me in. I would watch from the outside with my stomach grumbling, wishing for just one bowl. 

One day, I had been looking as usual when Mr. Park had been outside. I had no idea he was the owner at the time, he was just sitting at one of the tables. 

“It looks delicious, doesn’t it?” I had said as I noticed his eyes on me.

“Why don’t you go inside and try it for yourself? I heard it’s the best ramen in town!” He had said with a small laugh.

“I wish. Unfortunately, I just moved to the country and can’t really afford meals like this. One day I will tho!” I replied, while smiling back.

“Well, If you’d like, you can go inside and pick something you like. It’s on me.” He replied.

I stared at him in shock, wondering why some random man was suddenly offering me food. It had made me a little uncomfortable and I guess it had shown on my face because he immediately followed up by telling me he was the owner and had noticed me looking into the shop several times before. Although I tried to refuse, he said I didn’t have a choice so I graciously accepted. It was the most delicious bowl of ramen I had ever tasted. 

After that, Mr. Park had fed me a couple times a week. At first I thought there would be some kind of catch as I was not used to being treated with such kindness but turns out it was all out of the kindness of an old mans heart.

I spoke to him for a little bit before heading out again to the diner. 

“Minhyukshiiiii!”, I call out as I arrived. 

He turns to look at me, from the door as he switches the sign from “Closed” to “Open”.

“Good morning nuna.” He responds with a soft smile. 

“Good morning to you.” I say as we both walk past the door. 

I go to my usual booth and set down my bag. I unzip it and pull out the meal I prepared. 

“I have a surprise for you!” I say, with the packed up food in hand, spinning on my heel and presenting it to him with a wide smile. 

He looks down at it, then back up, and a smile spreads across his lips.

“You cooked for me?” He asks.

“I did! I hope you like it!” I say, pushing it towards him.

“Thank you, I will if it’s your cooking.” He says as he takes it. 

“You’re welcome! I thought you might need a little pick me up after what happened yesterday.” I say as I roll my eyes with the thoughts of that thug. 

As I'm thinking of that, for some reason, his face pops into my mind. Not the thug, but the other one. Jet black hair and two lip rings. 

“Nuna, are you ok? You look like a tomato, are you sick?” Minhyuk reaches out to touch my forehead. 

A tomato? Why am I blushing? Why did his face appear in my mind and make me think of…

No. I must be crazy. I can’t think of some stranger like that. Especially not some cocky gangster. If there’s one thing I despise, It’s cocky people. I mean, I have to admit, he’s very good looking but the cocky attitude is such a turn off. It really has been too long.

“No.. no I’m fine, it’s nothing.” I say as I take a step back towards my booth. 

He looks at me seeming unsure but then just shrugs his shoulders and sits in front of me. 

We enjoy our meal together, talking about everything and nothing. until the customers start showing up, he stands and attends to them. The rest of the staff arriving an hour later as per usual. 

Minhyuk likes working alone to open the restaurant. He wants things set a certain way and doesn't trust anybody to do it the way he likes so he always comes in an hour early to prepare on his own. I call him my rock or rocky sometimes because of his personality. I’m all over the place while he’s set and steady. I love our friendship. I couldn’t ask for a better best friend.

The hours flew by as I sat there drawing on my tablet. Working on this series is demanding but very fun. The fans love it so even if it’s exhausting, I work hard for them. There’s nothing else I’d rather be doing.

Jungkooks pov:

“Yeah, I’m headed there now.” I say to Yoongi on the phone.

“Ok, we’ll meet you in a couple hours. We have some things to take care of first.” He replies, knowing I know what “things” he means.

I hang up and get on my motorcycle. I start to head towards the diner for lunch. The fact that a member of the hummingbirds was on our turf is bad news. They all know we don’t step on each others land. Is he a rogue? Just doing it because he wants to? Is he a spy? Planted by Mr. Kim to keep an eye on me? Either way, I can’t just let this slide. My boys will take care of it. I haven’t eaten all day and I’m starving. 

I pull up to the diner and park my bike. Pulling off my helmet, I shake my hair to get rid of the helmet head. I sit there for a minute thinking of yesterday. Stop it Jungkook. You’re here for food. That’s it.

I step off my bike and head for the door, opening it and walking inside. Minhyuk greets me, as usual and my eyes just scan the place. They then fall on the girl, sitting in the same booth, seemingly lost in her thoughts, staring at the tablet on the table.

I smile and walk towards her booth. I stand next to her, her eyes not moving from the tablet. I take a peak and see beautiful artwork. What looks like a webtoon in the making. A guy with black hair and a lip ring being drawn. A speech bubble saying “And what if I said I love you?” Coming from this character that was half drawn. 

I laughed at the small resemblance and her eyes then shot up at me as she hurried to cover the screen.

“Well, hello again.” I said looking her in the eyes.

She just stared at me.

“I have to say, you draw very beautifully.” I say, meaning every word. 

She continues to just stare. 

“Is there something on my face?” I ask, bringing a hand up to touch my cheek.

“No, I’m just wondering why you’re talking to me.” She replies in a cold tone.

I pause, a little taken aback by her response. Should I really be surprised at this point?

“Is there a reason why I can’t?” I respond, feeling my lips pull up in a smirk.

“Apart from the fact that you don’t know me?” She questions.

“I mean, we can change that.” I say as I step forward and sit in the booth across from her.

“Hmm, I’m ok thanks. As you can see, I’m a little busy.” She says looking down at her tablet then back up at me.

This is the first time I’ve been rejected. 

“Well, how about when you’re not busy?” I say.

“I’m always busy.” She replies firmly.

Wow, gotta accept rejection Jungkook.

This girl is definitely interesting. I put my hands up in mock surrender.

“If you say so-‘ I stand and look down at her. ‘Have a nice day, pretty girl.” I say as I walk away to sit at another booth.

No means no. Even for me. However, this girl makes me want to keep trying.

Minhyuks pov:

I look from Jungkook, to Lia as they speak. I have no doubt that she won’t be interested based on how cocky Jungkook is. Knowing him and how competitive he is tho, he won’t just stop. However I also know he respects women, so it’s not like I have to step in. I watch her deny him just as I thought she would, and him walking away. From here I can’t hear what’s being said, however I do notice her blush as he walks away. I don’t like it one bit but it’s none of my business. She can do what she wants. 

My eyes follow him, my old friend, to the booth he chooses on the other side of the restaurant. I notice a smile on his face that looks different from his usual cocky grins. He looks deep in thought. Lia nunas attitude is not something he’s used to. 

As I look at him, I notice his eyes on me. He waves me over to his table. 

“What will it be Mr. Jeon?” I say taking out my pen and pad of paper to take his order.

“The usual, but also, sit I want to talk to you. Also, stop with the Mr. Jeon. We’re friends.” He says.

“We were friends.” I reply, emphasizing the past tense.

Jungkook and I grew up together. Our parents were close friends and so we also were friends growing up. Not just friends but brothers. Until that day. I can never look at him the same way.

“Common Minhyuk, I still don’t understand why you hate me so much. Anyways, just take a seat please.” He asks.

I sigh feeling resigned and take a seat across from him. I look back at Lia and notice her lost in her world of drawing as usual. I smile then look back at the man in front of me.

“What is it?” I ask.

“That girl over there, you said she’s your friend right?” He says.

“I did.” I respond.

“Is she always that cold?” He replies. 

This irritates me for some reason. Lia? Cold? Never. She is the warmest person I have ever met. Only to people she deems worthy however.

“That depends on who you are to her.” I simply say.

“So, no?” He catches onto my words quickly.

I stare at him unmoving. 

“Why doesn’t she like me? Am I not her type?” He asks me, sneaking a peak at her from across the restaurant. 

Actually speaking physically, he very much was her type. However Lia was always more focused on personality than looks. She might have liked the guy he used to be but she definitely would not like this version of him.

“Why should I help you?” I respond feeling annoyed.

“Oh common Minhyuk, I’m just asking as an old friend. You said she’s new to the area right? She must not have many friends. You know I’m not a bad person.” He said looking down at his hands on the table.

He’s right. Although I can’t forgive him for that day, I know that he’s not a bad person. He just does what he has to do. I can hate him all I want but Jungkook has been through hell and back. There is a reason he’s changed. Deep inside, that guy I grew up with is probably still in there.

“For the sake of our old friendship I’ll just tell you one thing Jeon. She hates your type.” I say honestly. 

“Oh now it’s just Jeon? How about Hyung like the old days?” He says smiling.

I stare at him unresponsive and he laughs.

“What exactly is my type?” He says a cocky grin on his face.

“The cocky type. The type that thinks they’re a gift to this world. She despises those type of people. Also, she’s not easy. She has high standards and doesn’t let just anyone into her inner circle.” I rise from my seat as I finish my statement and start to walk away.

“Minhyuk.” He calls my name.

I turn and look at him.

“You really think I’m like that?” He says looking at me. I see an emotion I haven’t seen in him in a long time.

“Look in the mirror and ask yourself that question.” I say with a cold tone.

He looks down, a sad smile on his face. 

“One last thing. What’s her name?” He questions, looking up.

“You can ask her that yourself hyung.” I say as I turn and walk away.

[themultifandomgal]

Harry Styles- Insecurities

Being the girlfriend of Harry Styles can come with many cons as well as pros. We’ve been together now for 3 years. For 2 of those years we kept our relationship quiet for a few different reasons. The first being Harry knew that I would have a fair bit of hate, which would be expected since his fans just want the best for him. I was worried that people (news outlets) would say I’m only with him for the money and fame. Harry is a private person just as I am and neither of us really wanted our relationship out in the public. We enjoyed our own little bubble. Unfortunately our own little bubble was burst after Harry’s phone was hacked and photos of us cuddled on the sofa and kissing were leaked. Harry’s PR team we’re amazing and during any interview about our relationship Harry always responds with “I’d like to keep that part of my life private”. Of course I love him and I know he loves me, but there are times when I can feel very insecure thanks to the media. I try not to look at it, but it’s everywhere.

Before Harry, I was in another relationship. It was toxic. He would often point out little imperfections of mine which caused me to become quite self conscious. Since dating Harry things did get better, but just like anyone you have good days and bad days.

Harry is currently on a break from tour, so I’ve come away with him and his family. Gemma and I are sunbathing while Harry went to get us some drinks. I smile as I watch Harry walking back to us. He’s then stopped by a woman who at first I thought was just a fan, and maybe she is, but when I see her flirting with Harry the insecurities start to bubble

"Are you ok?” Gemma asks, probably seeing my smile drop. She’s beautiful. Long flowing brown hair, tan long legs, and even from here I can tell her skin is so clear she doesn’t need any makeup.

"Look at her"

"Who the girl?"

"Yeah. Look she's so pretty nothing like me. Sometimes I wonder why Harry’s with me. I have stretch marks on my thighs, cellulite, my skin isn’t perfect. My stomach isn’t flat. I just can’t help but think he could do so much better than me” I turn to look at Gemma who’s become my best friend over the last few years.

"Oh YN. I know you struggled after your ex. He was an awful human. But you know just as well as I do that Harry doesn't care about all that. He’s not a shallow person. He loves you just the way you are. God he doesn’t shut up about you half the time. I’ve heard he whines most of the time on your asking when your arriving”

“Everythin’ ok?” Harry asks walking over to us frowning

"I'm going to give you two some space" Gemma gets up and walks over to Anne and Robbin. I a sit up and cross my legs looking down at the stretch marks staring at me

"What's wrong?"

"Why are you with me?"

"Because I love you. You know that" Harry says confused. I sigh "is this about that girl?" I nod my head "oh YN come here" Harry pulls me into him "yes she was flirtin but I told her that I had a girlfriend that I love very much. She then apologised and asked if she could have my autograph. I said no because ‘m on holiday and would like to enjoy m’self. You know I love you more than I ever thought could be possible”

“Even though I’m not a hollywood supermodel?”

“You are one in my eyes. You are smart, kind, and very sexy” this makes me laugh a little as Harry kisses my cheek

"I’m sorry. I try not the be so insecure”

“I know you do love. You don’t need to apologise. Your still learnin to love yourself after your ex and deal with the media”

“How did I get so lucky with you?”

“More like how did I get so lucky with you. Love you”

“Love you too”

[bliss-wily]

And Zarbon as a partner too. How would he be as a romantic partner?

Gender neutral, SFW and under the cut.

Now I know I’ve definitely written for Zarbon before. This will be more extensive than the ones I’ve written for Dodoria for…reasons. Obvious reasons if you’re even on this account for a mere second. As always I’m sorry if these overlap with anything anyone else has said. I promise it’s coincidental. Official media has given me much of this context so anime, manga, games, etc.

Now I don’t normally write - especially ‘romance’ but I tried.

Now let’s start with some context…

•I imagine his people have romance as a core value. This will be important for some of these headcanons.

•I think his people might also be cold blooded (literally).

•I’m a bit wary of saying this (as I’ve faced some backlash before) but based mostly on Xenoverse 2, I also headcanon that Zarbon is autistic. This might be needed as context for some.

Headcanons for his ‘normal’ form:

•He would love his partner ALMOST as much as he loves himself.

•Just give the man attention, he can be a bit needy.

•His s/o will become one of his favourite topics of conversation. Guess who Dodoria and Frieza will be hearing plenty about?

•A complete flirt and a charmer…maybe unintentionally at times. He’s a little oblivious.

•Flirting back may turn him into a highly flustered mess though. It’s one way to break that stoic exterior of his.

•He is going to vent a lot. He’s very high maintenance.

•Expect fancy dinners and classical ‘romantic’ dates.

•Oh and spa dates of course. He likes being pampered.

•Expensive gifts as the man has more money than sense…or so it may seem.

•He’s more emotionally vulnerable than he seems, be patient. I imagine being a right hand man to Frieza is difficult.

•Be prepared for public displays of affection. The would want everyone to know.

•Probably occasionally gets scolded if he’s being a bit of a drama queen.

•If he isn’t with his partner due to work then expect plenty of communication.

•Play with his hair, sure it’s likely a death sentence for most but not his partner.

•I don’t think he could handle silent treatment. He would grovel.

•He would be very animated when he’s excited or passionate. Especially if he’s talking about his interests.

•Expect this to be more amplified if he’s drunk, only on the finest wines of course.

•A clingy drunk who will absolutely cry over his partner. He strikes me as being very emotional at times.

•Also clingy if it’s cold, he needs heat. His s/o must provide him with heat! (Unless they’re also cold blooded then he’s screwed)

•He’s not going to be monotonous with his partner most of the time. His other half would see the truest version of himself.

•You will be fighting him to use the bathroom though. I expect the shelves would be lined with all his products too. The bathroom is HIS space.

•Don’t touch his scarf collection either, without permission anyway.

Headcanons for his ‘monster’ form:

•Cuddles now.

•He needs some reassurance. After all he feels ugly like this.

•Somedays he might just wake up like this and will absolutely refuse to be seen in public. That doesn’t mean he wants to be alone though. He needs his other half.

•Although the first time this happens he would probably be trying to hide or be very avoidant. He would be quite ashamed of himself for being like this.

•An oversized puppy.

•An oversized overprotective puppy.

•Did I mention cuddles?