#of my romantics and that was it. it was never because of the character themself

[catras-breakup-song]

i’m not gonna lie… i’m lost here. is this supposed to be an 4nt1/cr1t1c4l post? if so, i genuinely don’t understand the point being made.

is it that playful banter is a bad thing? is it that being too hands-on violates unspoken boundaries? the message is so unclear to my autistic ass…

oh, wait, OP provided tags:

so aside from the fact that they are absolutely not sisters by default, least of all canonically (even if you do interpret them that way somehow), nor was it ever intended by nate stevenson, i’m still having trouble figuring out how this is problematic.

in which ways is lighthearted touch totally contradictory to passionate kissing/caressing? why can’t partners who are dating do both, especially in different cultural environments such as the horde where intimacy is discouraged and friendly sparring with familiar peers is a safe expression? if it’s so different, what are we as the audience supposed to interpret from their style of physical affection by the final season? side note, but aren’t we supposed to consider the latest version of anything in general as the most accurate?

now i have a question lol, did you take this moment literally at her word, and all the other times she repeated it?

also, my friend just pointed out that this is the classic homophobic talking point of "they seem to just be very good friends! they were roommates!" lmao. i've never agreed with accusing anyone who cr1t1c1z3s catradora of lesbophobia, which i'm not doing necessarily, because that's simply not how it works, however i found this funny and partially true so i'm keeping it in.

the lip bite was included unintentionally 👀

anyway, as i’ve discussed on this blog before, i’m very arospec and it’s inseparably intwined with my identity itself; i also project that onto catra. something we often bring up in that community, is romance-favorability (as its own spectrum of range all the way to blatant repulsion btw) — which is a personal preference that’s defined as exactly as it sounds like and occasionally revolves around fictional depiction as separate from one's own reality — and arguably more importantly, amatonormativity — which is an arbitrary set of rules for romantic expectations set up by an alloromantic society. this is typically thought of as common denial of the idea that someone could actually want to separate themself from needing a life partner in marriage, but can very much be applied to an annoying list of what draws the line between romantic & platonic relationships. that line is very individualistic and is to be decided on such a level only, and it doesn’t even get into what queerplatonic means, a concept saved for another day!

my point is, the OP seems to be trying to claim that catradora objectively cannot be read as romantic because their dynamic growing up & early-on in the story doesn’t perfectly meet socially-constructed standards of what that should look like. i say we need to eradicate those standards altogether! it’s up to catradora to decide what they are, if anything specific at all, not us as the audience — assuming they could’ve had the words at their disposal to knowingly describe it. going back to my earlier paragraph above about how limited they were in the fright zone, i’ll borrow a quote from a comment i made on one of my recent reblogged posts (which is a great meta on how their mutual desire was uh... definitely not platonic):

"Catra and Adora’s desire for one another is shown in a variety of ways, mostly indirect. There are a lot of glances - until season 5, not the kind of open leering at one another that we’d seen between other characters. Mostly it’s fairly playful - wiggled or cocked eyebrows, glances at each other while smirking, that kind of thing, or really intense and somewhat angry glares when they’re fighting."

it's really bothering me that i can't recall where i read this from before, but someone analyzed before how, growing up, catra & adora didn't have a good sense of how to label their relationship with accurate terminology despite being subconsciously aware that they, whether they knew the other reciprocated or not, loved each other "like that." unfortunately, they couldn't further explore it because such love & affection was seen as a punishable weakness in the horde, so they resorted to the only safe option they seemed to have, which was subtle body language and play-fighting as [testudoaubrei-blog] described above.

also, since this screenshot is included in that post... i would be amused to read an explanation of how THIS LOOK from catra is "platonic with a capital P", because i'm not even sure if it's up for debate to be quite honest with you:

ESPECIALLY with the "i always have!" line (which 4nt1s like to doubt, but i don't care, it's official!):

[coderooster]

Part of me really hopes that Eddie stays single until the show inevitably ends. It doesn't even need to be an asexuality/aromanticism storyline (although that would be very cool), I just think that not everyone needs/wants a romantic partner, ESPECIALLY when they've lost one already.

Despite many attempts, he's never truly gotten over Shannon, and maybe that's not a bad thing. Disregarding the dysfunctionality of that relationship, he clearly loves her and will only ever compare a new relationship to what he had with her. If he is unable and unwilling to move on from her all these years later then there's not really much point in trying anymore. It'll either happen or it wont at this point and its been leaning towards not for a while. Maybe I'm biased because my parent is widowed and has shown no interest in dating again/is happy by themself, but romance isn't the be all end all and I think that every form of media falls to the idea that it is.

Eddie never really showed a want for a romantic relationship after Shannon died. Yeah, he may have been flustered over Ana, but Carla and Bobby had a big hand in persuading him to pursue her, and the only reason he started trying to date again after that was purely because Pepa basically pushed him to. He even expresses how much he dislikes dating. If he hates it so much, why do we keep forcing him to do it? Especially when both relationships have crashed and burned in spectacular fashion.

Chris leaving and Buck being less available is SUCH a good thing for Eddie because he can finally learn who he is without any external influences. But it also provides the opportunity for him to find out how fine he is to be alone and that he already has everything he needs in his existing family.

I just think it would be a great option for Eddie, especially when it's a very rare for a character to accept that they're happy outside of a relationship.

[bananablossoms06]

Anything on the topic of the two wives? (Mrs. and Mrs. Em) I've seen your designs and art with them, but never really anything where they were interacting with each other or just by themself (or maybe I just don't remember)

(Long paragraphs ahead sorry)

I did have old art where William and his first wife somewhat interacted and had character sheets for William's wives (In my opinion he had more than 1 or no wife at all - hence why I have too many AUs)

And in that case I wanted to show kind of the dynamic between Will and his spouses vs. Henry with his spouse because its a whole thing in 3/4 of my AUs. I wont go into full lore (unless someone wants to know) about the main AU but basically William had 3 different marriages where each one of them failed (he killed his first wife despite actually having been in love with her and also killing his second wife). Henry on the other hand was very much in love with his wife but he had a previous romantic relationship with William before meeting her making him have this "stuck" mindset between wanting to be with William and his current wife, he didn't realize he was bisexual and he eventually had an affair on her with William and theres more but to keep it simple...Main au is crazy

In the Beatrice AU its bit different

There is no actual marriage between William and "Clara" they were just romantic partners because William forced himself back into his homo-closet when Henry was very obviously happy with a woman (in this au Henry never had an affair on his wife but still did have past romantic...hints at William though never s3xual like in the main au). William basically never was himself with "Clara" because- even though he's pansexual he has more romantic feelings towards masculinity and (for the most part) biologically born men...Until dating Jack!! But William will always have an obsession over Henry...especially after haven't seen him for a whole decade and they get a bit... "hot and steamy" if y'know what I mean- and despite after Henry haven't been with Elena for almost the same amount of years, he still loves her. He loves her, both William. He's a very complicated man tbh

[purge-samauwu]

I👏🏾NEED👏🏾MORE👏🏾LAIOS X SENSHI👏🏾CONTENT!!!!

It's not fair😫😫

They'd be so perfect bro. The autism duo who understand each other. Out of everyone who Laios is shipped with he's the only one that has never looked at him like he was subhuman! (I love the cast but they be making my boy feel lonely sometimes) the only thing close to that that Senshi does is give him the fluoride stare but that's just how he is most of the time so it isn't personal. (I'm looking at you chilchuck with your 16,000 stank faces)

And you can't even deny, out of all of the possible combinations, Senshi is the only one with a 0% chance of saying a single ableist thing to Laios. Partly because he knows the struggle but also because he doesn't operate on society's expectation of normalcy. He doesn't feel like how people talk, walk, and/or act should be dictated by the norms other individuals set and thinks it's foolish to think of people as inhuman simply for something like a difference in behavior.

NOW ONTO THE SHIT THAT MAKES THEM ALIKE IN WAYS I EAT FOR BREAKFAST.

Laios as well as senshi confirmed geek over the monsters and the different ways to prepare them. So if Senshi ever wanted to initiate anything romantic-like he'd woo Laios with that good monster food. But realistically if they ever had crushes on each other neither would really know because they themself's wouldn't even really sus it out.

So Chilchuck would be in the room looking at them and with his 75 years of experience(joke) he'd say some shit like: kiss already😑 while lazily and haphazardly sharpening one of his lil daggers. And then once it clicked it would be "mind activation" for both of them. Then they'd start the awkward mating ritual. This of course being painful to look at for Marcille, runs away everytime she even thinks they're going to interact.

Said mating ritual involves: talking about anything that comes to either of their mind with each other until they're throats get so dry they can't physically speak anymore(I got autism and I'm very comfortable with one my friends so this actually happened)

Doing the complete opposite and being able to sit in complete and utter silence while still looking like they're communicating (they on that telepathy shit)

Understanding immediately when one or the other isn't up for something or if they don't feel like talking to the others but don't know how to voice it.

Imagine other people in the dungeon look at the two and think they're acquaintances because of how nonchalant they talk to each other only for one of them to do some the most romantic shit out of nowhere then go back to being chill.

The looks of bewilderment would be insane.

(Genuinely I don't think I'm that good of voicing my opinion of characters and ships so if you can help me reword parts that feel weird to you feel free to comment because I wrote this while having a random spark of inspiration at the dead of night.)

[avoicebehindthestars]

How much Aziracrow can we hope for? (I did the maths)

tl;dr It's 17 minutes.

I went over both seasons of Good Omens over the past few days and I wrote down how much screentime Aziraphale and Crowley have in them. Then I did some maths…

*Btw. I've rounded my equations for clarity because I reckon tiny fractions don't matter that greatly. I have a whole excel chart with the scenes length counted in seconds and meticulous calculations based on that if anyone wants to see.*

I'll start with season 2 because it has spoiled us rotten. The season (without the opening and ending credits - though I did include e6 credits up to the point where their faces blur out) lasts 259 minutes. The scenes with Aziraphale and Crowley take up 118 minutes of that. That's 45.5%. If you apply that number to the 90m, you get:

90*45.5% = 41

Forty one minutes of Aziraphale and Crowley's shared screentime. Depending on how you take it, it doesn't sound like much (in fact it's 21 minutes less than all their screentime in the minisodes), but it's like an entire season 2 episode made up entirely out of their screentime.

Except…

Over a half of their screentime (62 minutes to be exact) in s2 is in the minisodes. And, let's be real, we're not getting any of that with just 90 minutes to tell the story of another Armageddon't. So! Season 2 minus the minisodes is reportedly 142 minutes. 56 minutes of that are taken by Aziraphale and Crowley in scenes together, which gives us 39.5%

90*39.5% = 35.5

That's roughly 35 minutes 30 seconds. Still doing okay with that? You'd better, because we're about to leave our sweet delululand.

Season 3 was never supposed to be like season 2. That was our "gentle, quiet and romantic" intermission, a backdoors prologue to the final season. Season 3 was always supposed to be like season 1: another mad-paced stop-the-apocalypse narrative. Just like the majority of season 1 focused on Adam and a plethora of side characters that had a role to play in stopping the Armageddon, the 90m will have to tell the story of the Second Coming and show how those characters move across the board towards stopping it (let's remember that Shadwell is low-key confirmed to return, so yes, we are getting thost side characters and each of them will need screentime); as well as the child of god themself, of course.

So, let's look at the numbers for s1 instead. Season 1 lasts a little over 306 minutes (again, minus opening and ending credits). The scenes with Aziraphale and Crowley take up 73 minutes of that. That's 23.8%.

90*23.8% = 21.5

Twenty one minutes and thirty seconds. Ouch.

Unfortunately, we're not done yet. 30 minutes of Aziraphale and Crowley's shared screentime is in the first half of e3 (the much-loved through-the-ages sequence) and the second half of e6 (the body swap plotline) - both of which only found their way into Good Omens because there was time left. The scenes in total last 56 minutes (btw I decided to count in the whole epilogue, minus the Ritz, even though a lot of it shows the aftermath for other characters - if I'd counted that into the "main" season, seeing as a lot of it is in the novel, the numbers would look even worse), leaving 250 minutes of the actual season 1. The scenes with Aziraphale and Crowley now take up a bit under 48 minutes. That gives us 19%. So, ready for the final equation?

90*19% = 17

Seventeen minutes of Aziraphale and Crowley's shared screentime.

That's less than 2/3 of the through-the-ages sequence. It's roughly as much as there is of them in s1e1 (only the episode itself is 47 minutes long - it's the second most Aziracrow-heavy in all of s1).

And just so we're clear, when I jotted down the scenes to include, I took ALL scenes that have both Aziraphale and Crowley in them - not only those that are about them, when they are talking or otherwise interacting, focused on each other, but also e.g. when Crowley talks to Gabriel and Aziraphale stands in the background, or when they bring back Job's children. I did that because MS and DT are brilliant actors and I firmly believe they can saturate each such scene with love and longing so much that it'll leak off our screens. See? I can be quite the optimist.

So yeah, enjoy your New Year and the upcoming 6 weeks of filming, I guess.

[damnfandomproblems]

Fandom Problem #4680:

Outrage over shipping (or lewding) canonically aromantic and / or asexual characters.

I definitely understand the frustration of people just refusing to recognize or acknowledge their identity, since there's so few of them already. But i also see a lot of inflexibility in NOW aro / ace people are viewed or expected to behave. (Mostly either naiive and childishly innocent, awkward quirky teens, or cold robotic and unfeeling). And being aroace myself I rarely see any that actually resonate or feel compelling. Not to say those can't exist ever or that aspec people who ARE happy with them are "wrong" in any way, but I wish the perception what or how an aro / ace person can be wasn't so limited (and honestly---boring).

More of my characters than not are SOME flavor of aspec and all of them have very, very different ways of experiencing it. (And it's not all just "for the representation!!" they just feel natural to the characters and a lot of them are experiences I personally relate to) This includes:

a clout-obsessed social climber who uses relationships as a way of getting what she wants and to boost her ego, and nothing more

someone who's obsessed with the IDEA of romance and really really WANTS to fall in love with someone but it just never happens

someone completely repulsed with sex and romance althogether

an asexual person who wants to try it just to know what it's like but that's all

a sex worker for whom sex is quite literally just "showing up to work" for her, not awful or traumatic or anything, mostly just kinda boring

an aroace person who is so codependant with someone (who's allo) that they basically just form a relationship (along with all the things that usually go with it that the ace person doesn't mind going along with for their sake) I guess what people may call a QPR but that's not a term I personally like to use or find any use for it's okay for others though

someone who's still figuring themself out who hasn't really landed on any specific labels but also isn't really stressing on it that much

someone who takes longer to realize they're aro because for so long what they assumed were romantic feelings was really just feeling flattered, so thought they were "in love with" anyone who was nice to them

aliens whose anatomy includes no sex organs

And sometimes, characters are hot. And characters that are hot get shipped with other hot characters, often with no rhyme or reason other than "hot". Regardless of their canon sexualities. It kinda just comes with the territory of fandom.

(And again I'm really really tired of people using us a a shield to hide their ship hate and sex negativity. Seriously, don't.)

[bilehwit]

Just read your Bilehwit Au on Ao3 and was greetes by the amazing ref for the lamb here on tumblr!

And yes i absolutely love it when people explain clothing choices in character design especially since you wrote Lamb culture is based on the Old English pls do ramble 🙏

Well hello!! This my first ask from someone I've never met before, so I'll ask you to please be patient with my wild trails of thought.

This will be a long one, but I'll focus on two main outfits - the daily wear and the ritual outfit, as they have the most symbolism.

The easiest one is obviously the leaf outfit - cute, I love it so much!

The leaf was chosen for its symbolism in English mythology. The tree itself is well beloved as a symbol of strength and a symbol of fertility - acorns are often depicted as lucky, and an oak full of acorns is a good sign of fertility!

I also chose oak because I think they're very beautiful trees - they can live for up to 1,000 years, and they can grow to 30 meters wide in their leaves. That's amazing to me. They also smell nice, and I remember climbing them when I was little, so it's nice to share the oak with my lambsona.

Next, let's talk about the sacrifice outfit - it's oddly bridal, no?

Well it's intended to be!

The use of white/silver to denote Purity is an old concept, but white wedding dresses in England were only truly popularised after Queen Victoria wore the colour to her wedding - previously a mourning shade.

I chose silver satin as the fabric, and a simple design, as I wanted a bridal look but also something that felt sleek and pure. Bilehwit is a virgin (virgin sacrifice in all ways) and it's a cruel trick to play.

Also, Shamura in my fic struggles to see/differentiate between objects, so having an all white lamb made it easier for them to stay focused.

So while this outfit feels bridal to us, the symbolism in fic is more that it was easier than dying fabric, just raw spider thread spun into a dress.

Shamura did make the veil themself, though, for reasons you will see later ;3

Now, we get to the heavy hitters! First up, the daily outfit.

Now, Anglo-Saxons were all about those layers! So this outfit actually has more layers than you'd even think.

Under the base dress is a thin cotton chemise, or under dress, made to soak up the oils of the skin and sweat, changed most often. Bilehwit would use these as pyjamas in the summer months, too, to keep cool while covered and decent.

The next layer is the linen, with the thin dark band. This would be a slightly tighter layer to the body, and would be long sleeved to offer protection from the sun and the cold. Linen would be the lighter colours, as they'd be protected more, and linen was used as a middling layer to hold heat in winter. Air would be trapped between layers and keep people warm, and also it protected them from any scratchy wool. The woven ribbon at the bottom is decorative.

The next layer is my favourite. This is the red layer, the thicker dress, made often from wool or from linen again. This is made from wool, using a technique called naalbinding, which is what the Anglo-Saxons would have used, as they didn't knit like is common today.

Anglo-Saxon embroidery and weaving was actually really well known in Europe for its fine work and was gifted to Emissaries and Kings. The weaving and sewing business in England went hard as hell, and it's where most people would be employed for personal use or as gifts.

The embroidery of flowers on the cuffs of the red dress, as well as the colar, are those of Achillea millefolium, or 'Red Velvet', flowers. These tiny buds are native to Europe, western Asia and North America, and are small blooms that self seed and explode into colour. I chose them after seeing the flowers on a sketch, and decided that I had to include them.

Red in flower language is always to do with romance and passion. I wanted Bilehwit to show that desire, as they are a hopeless romantic at heart, and they also just feel a deep-seated loneliness that they want filled. The red flowers are the only flowers they've ever been given, and they've spent hours tracing the embroidery threads and staring silently at the sky.

The final apron layer is just that - an apron. It's a thin, boxy piece of fabric that is played on top to ensure the front of the dress stays somewhat clean, and there is a secret pocket behind it that they store honey-sweets in for children (and themself). Just a length of plain cut cloth!

Tied together with a woven belt, this outfit is my second favourite - I love every detail, and when I can talk in fic about it, I will spend thousands of words trying to detail what it means to me, and probably failing.

The final outfit now, one that definitely won't be seen in fic for a good long while - the Fancy/Ritual set.

Look at ittttt ahahahahagahqabqgagagquipqguqugjv

Okay, keysmash over, serious time!

Now, this outfit is interesting, because not only does it have embroidery and styles of old English culture, it also has mixes of Indian influence too!

"Well, that's random to add," I hear you murmur, and you're right. Why would I add that?

Well, because originally I was going to make Narinder have a more Egyptian vibe! I thought; ah, perfect, he'd do great as a Sphynx cat, the Egyptians loved those cats.

See, as it turns out, Narinder is actually a Sanskrit/Hindu name. It's a form of the name Narendra, a masculine name that means "Lord of Men". It's a very formal name, and one I immediately knew I had to switch things around for.

Following this, I was also able to determine the domains and cultures of each other Bishop, by tracing back names and meanings! That's a whole other post I fear.

Back to the dress!

The outline is far more recent than Old English, medieval style dresses, and that's because, uh... I wanted it. (This one is not very historically accurate. Forgive me.)

I wanted a mix of English style embroidery and Indian embroidery styles. Will come back and edit in which style I went with specifically, but I wanted the ritual set to be a touch more dedicated to Narinder, with darker colours, and more Indian fusion embroidery.

The black is velvet, the red is silk, and the white is linen - why? Again, it looks cool.

I can't lie, I have very little explanation for this besides the fact it looks bangin'.

But yes!! That's all my explanations at this current point in time for outfits! However, if you have any further questions, please ask away, and I will happily detail everything and anything about my AU and fic! Thank you for joining me on my rambling!

[cephydeluxe]

most Simeon/MC fics r kyute as hell, but a lot of them focus simeon's reason for "falling" (aka: disobeying father's rule of never extending a human's life by stealing the ring of light) as solely because he loves mc,

and like..... that's ok 😐 and all, but I feel like it kinda narrows simeon's character a bit ((but the following thoughts below r my interpretation so take this more as appreciation than a criticism of any other interpretations of simeon))

Simeon, regardless of whether or not it's reciprocated, still feels brotherly love for the brothers. They were once his brothers, and when it came time to wage war against them in the name of their Father, he refused to fight them and was demoted.

His love for his family made him refuse God's orders because the idea of harming his family was worse than the disapproval of God.

"ok well what does this have 2 do w the ring of light" shut up ill get 2 that >:(

I'm not gonna recap much cause my phone's at like 8% idgaf srry 😒. The only important parts is that mc's existence and pacts w the brothers is highly unstable and causing chaos in the three realms, and the only ways to fix it are to either kill lucifer with the night dagger, or to obtain the ring of light from the celestial realm.

So it's either trade lucifer's life for mc's, or steal the ring from micheal. The ring is immediately ruled out because demons can't enter the celestial realm, and it would probably (most definitely) cause a political shitstorm if a demon did steal it.

So the only option left is to kill lucifer, and right as mc is given the choice of killing him or themself, here comes Simeon, fresh from the celestial realm with the stolen ring of light in tow

Now, most fics tend to depict these events as simeon risking his status as archangel (an already unstable position given his refusal to fight during the war) as a huge romantic sacrifice because of his love for mc.

And that's,, cute ig but there is so many more things going on in that scene (2 me at least, solmare isn't really known 4 their writing 🫢)

Simeon's sacrifice in stealing the ring, in potentially incurring the wrath of God, in committing the same sin Lilith did to be disowned and even killed by their shared Father, and in risking his home he was raised and lived in for his entire life,

was both for his family that he has missed for thousands of years and for the person who healed them when he himself was unable to.

The TSL series (written by Simeon before the exchange program) are a retelling of the events between the avatars and mc. Even after they are cast out of heaven for treason and simeon is demoted for not wanting to hurt them, he still cares about them and wants the best for them, writing stories about them and their "Henry".

Even if the brothers treat him coldly and distantly, he still cares about them deeply enough that the prospect of killing lucifer? Their eldest brother?

The one who constantly does everything in his power to keep the rest of his family safe after the death of his sister?

The one who traded his loyalty to the demon prince after just landing after being thrown out of his home?

It's completely unthinkable to Simeon.

So that just leaves MC, then. The reincarnation of Lilith and the friend of all seven brothers, even after being violently killed by one of them,

(belphie, cough cough)

Still accepts all of them and keeps them together, and at this point in the story, is practically welcomed as a fixture in their messy yet tight-knit family.

For MC to sacrifice themself for the brothers would be to break them, to leave another unfillable void in their hearts like Lilith did so many years ago. The moment things would return to normal and Lucifer regained his memories would be devastating, knowing that yet again he failed to keep his family safe and whole.

Grief for MC's death would be felt far and wide, Simeon included.

Both outcomes of using the night dagger are unthinkable to Simeon, both causing unimaginable grief for everyone.

So the ring of light is all that remains.

It's a no-brainer, really.

Angels aren't restricted from the celestial realm, and if the ring is stolen by an angel, it has a way less likely chance of falling back on the devildom, on the fragile peace him and many others have worked so hard to facilitate between the three realms.

So what if the consequences will primarily fall upon Simeon alone, it matters little to the certain disaster either outcomes of wielding the night dagger will bring. Both Lucifer and MC will be unharmed, and the chaos will end.

But could you imagine the feelings he must have felt?

In the chamber where the ring of light is kept, having just snuck past Micheal, a twist in his gut from breaking the most basics of holy disciplines he has spent his entire life embodying, just staring at the ring of light in its container, the last momento of a father's love for his favorite child before disowning him.

It's a warning, a sign that tells Simeon that he will be next to fall if he takes this ring.

He takes it anyway, throwing his loyalty to God away if it means saving Lucifer, saving his family, saving the peace they've obtained without him.

A penance, maybe, for his inaction in the war, when perhaps one seraphim could've made a difference, if not win the war, then at least could've spared Lilith's life.

Can you imagine how he must have felt, standing in front of MC with the ring in his hands?

Lilith's sin that started the war wasn't just that she fell in love with a human, it was when she extended the life of her lover because of it. A clear defiance of Father's will, to negate written fate for the sake of her selfish love was what got her killed.

And here Simeon stands, staring into the eyes of her reincarnation as he offers them the ring that will save them, extend their life, and doom Simeon to walk the same path their angelic ancestor died on.

The ring is a promise, of the disownment that Simeon faces, of the pain he will endure in defying God's word as an angel (whose sole objective, down to the very fabric of his being, to the very purpose of his creation, is to embody and enforce), of the corruption of his very soul that paints his ivory feathers black.

It's also a promise of devotion, of commitment to this deadly sin, this selfless sacrifice, to the human he's fallen in love with, and to the family he longs to be close with again.

It's a vow, for all the atrocities he's willing to commit for the sake of protecting those he cherishes above all else.

It's a vow, for the deeply rooted love for the human, one who's very existence is the result of the tragic end of the angel who came before him and paved the doomed path he now walks.

Like Oroboros eating its tail, Simeon's love for the demon brothers and MC is never-ending and inevitable.

When asked, he says he wishes he could've fought with the brothers in the war, so he could "stay the same as them" and that the war weighed heavily on his mind from time to time.

Ever since he watched them be cast down to hell, he was destined to fall with them someday, too.

.

.

.

(christ, this got so out of hand, this is probably a huge mess to read, srry I'm not a writer or a media analyst, this is just ramblings of someone who's got some really dramatic art to make.) simeon 4ever bby <3

(also I could make a separate post from solomon's pov where he's willing to sacrifice a pact with lucifer, something he's worked for years for a chance, just to save MC, but im sleepy goodnight)

(most of this post was written while I was listening to elden ring ost, thank u bayle the dread for making this post way more dramatic than it needed to be)

[thelien-art]

For the idea ask game, would you do Mîm and Maedhros, please?

This got a bit long... ups, but thanks for the ask :) <3, made me think about the dwarves as a whole a bit more

Mîm:

First impression: Something is fundamentally wrong with this guy for forgiving his son's murderer and simping (?) over said murder...

Impression now: I hate him so much okay? Like that little bastard tried to kill Finrod in his sleep! AND!! And betrayed Túrin and Beleg!

Favorite moment: The three hunters original!! No, never mind, he betrayed them because of his dislike for his son's murderer´s situationship… - I think it´s a bit funny that he was so jealous of Túrin´s love I believe it was a platonic obsession born from the need for control for Beleg, he might just be one of the first "if I can´t have you no one can"

Idea for a story: Redemption Túrin gets to kill him, instead of Húrin, right before dying as he takes Mîm in trying to claim the treasure for himself, and Mîm´s course gets so much more fucked up because it gets mixed with Túrin´s own.

Unpopular opinion: His curse wasn´t swag enough. I love angst okay? It would have been so cool if we had more stories about the cursed treasures, more than just the Nauglamír.

Favorite relationship: Death :) I would like to know more about the petty dwarves, so I guess his family ties...?? Although, I think it was a bit... complicated... with his sons at least...

Favorite headcanon: Upon his death Glaurung let some of his power out which Mîm somehow got maybe because he was the most wicked near?? that made him able to cast such a precise and powerful curse.

Maedhros:

First impression: First born of a "mad" king? I know to many fairitales to know how this is going to end, but I do like tall ginger dudes with long hair :)

Impression now: Favorit depressed ginger elf I want to throw against the wall as a bouncy ball. He´s a horrible guy, but man I love his tragic story and his tries for redemption (?) before realizing it´s all hopeless... I love him so much, one of my favorit.

Favorite moment: "A king is he that can hold his own or else his title is vain" like this little fucker grew up in a political world, and he has seen so much shit and he will not take any more!! I just love how ready he is to mock people and call them out on their BS. - although I think the quote carries a bit more than that, I don´t think Maedhros is mocking Thingol, even though that is who he speaks about. Thingol IS Lord of Beleriand, as all Sindar heed him, so I think Maedhros with his little speech managed to both get people over on his side, questioning Thingol, while still acknowledging his Lordship, and mock Morgoth, all in the same breath.

Idea for a story: An AU where he didn´t give the crown to Fingolfin. Maybe they shared kingship to prevent a civil war, or maybe Fingolfin thought that as long as he at least could be the right hand of Maedhros he would do everything to prevent a civil war as none of them would survive a civil war with Morgoth still there. I don´t know, I just see a lot of potential in this kind of AU :)

Unpopular opinion: Maedhros did grow up in a politically tense environment, although I´m not sure how much he felt of it as little, and I think it affected a lot of how he sees the world and how low he is willing to go for things he wants. I don´t think he´s a nice guy, and I´m not sure I ever believe he was a nice guy, I think he´s willing to lie and kill (as is seen) to get what he wants, although he prefers the... cleaner way. I see his story as a story about how someone can fall and what reasons are behind it and what pushes the character to their actions. Just make it as tragic as possible. He´s a tragic hero to me, one who did so much, yet still failed.

Favorite relationship: Platonic or romantic, either way, Fingon. From one day I see them as platonic the next as romantic, but I love their relationship so much, like they WILL, one HAVE, save each other both from themself but also from straight up hell!

Favorite headcanon: The closest brother to him is Caranthir!! And they got even closer after Angband where Caranthir was the one to help him teach him to use his left hand, here he also learned how to sew for the first time, as he needed to do something he hadn´t been good at before to show that he wasn´t bad he just needed practice!

My impression of character...

[pinchinschlimbah]

On "Coming Out" and Noel Fielding

I mentioned forever ago that I had this post in mind and then never got around to it, but now with the new interview quote I was yelling about recently it feels like a particularly good time to get it out of my brain and onto the page! tl;dr: musings on the concept of "coming out" as it has evolved over time, whether it's something that should continue to be necessary or expected of queer people, and why Noel is particularly inspirational to me in that regard since this is, after all, my brainrot blog. This may be extremely long and a bit disjointed but I hope some of y'all will enjoy it!

So a while ago myself and several friends were discussing the concept of coming out. All of us are some flavor of queer both in gender and orientation, but each is in a different place along their self discovery and identity journey, with some being long since out and proud, and others just starting to dip their toes into exploration past the expected cishet.

This discussion actually was prompted by a different discussion about Noel, spurred by comments we'd come across slamming him as being homophobic/transphobic on Bakeoff for making comments suggesting he has romantic or sexual attraction towards Paul, referring to himself with female-centric terms, playing female characters in the skits, and a particular moment where he brings up Old Gregg while talking to KimJoy and says "he was a sea transsexual....quite a demanding role for me" while laughing to indicate that that last part was said in jest. Hey fellas, is it homophobic/transphobic to be a little bit gay and trans? This got us talking about how the current culture of queer identity has evolved to the point where "coming out" feels more like something the public feels they're owed in order for them to view one's expression as valid, rather than its original purpose as something one does for themself in order to live most authentically. I don't think I need to go into detail about how many artists have been harassed by their "fans" into coming out before they were ready because people wouldn't accept the validity of that person's work without knowing exactly how that person identified, there've been plenty of articles and video essays and better written tumblr posts about that, but it's definitely a concerning trend. It can be particularly dangerous when it comes to people who aren't feeling confident or safe enough to come out, who end up being criticized and shunned by the queer community as being somehow problematic for not being able to fully articulate to a group of strangers the ways in which they're experiencing their identity. In this situation, the people who are struggling the most end up with the least support. Forcing people to either declare an identity or get out just leads to more people staying closeted out of fear of doing it "wrong" and never getting the chance to explore the most authentic and joyful versions of themselves, or even worse, feeling the need to out themselves before they're in a safe place to do so and suffering the resulting consequences. Questioning or cautious people deserve space in the community to experiment even if they haven't yet or maybe never will come out! My high school's Gay Straight Alliance was comprised entirely of "straight allies" when I was there. There was not a single "out" person in the school at the time. Nearly all of us in the GSA ended up being some flavor of queer or trans years later after graduation. But whether it was intentional closeting or just feeling an innate affinity towards something we couldn't quite pinpoint at the time, we all knew we belonged there and made that space for ourselves and others like us. Back when "coming out" first became a concept in the public consciousness, it was during a time where cishet identity was not just considered the default, but the only option. By coming out, queer people were giving genuinely revolutionary representation for themselves and others like them by telling the world that, as the old saying goes, we're here, we're queer, get used to it! Nowadays, we're lucky to live in a culture that is much more cognizant of queer identities being a thing, so in many cases coming out has become less about having to explain to those around you the basic concept of queerness existing, and moreso about which specific identity you fall under, and that's where things get messy.

My friends and I shared our own thoughts and experiences. One is currently identifying as "unlabeled" because they haven't found a term that feels correct yet, and therefore hasn't come out because they wouldn't know what to say. One spoke about how when they first came out they were much more insistent on what terms or pronouns people used for them but as time has gone on they've grown to find joy in being inscrutable and letting others wonder what they're perceiving. One expressed that given the state of the world they've been retreating somewhat back into the closet for safety reasons rather than being super outward with their queerness like they used to and is working on learning to embrace those parts of themself again. One said they felt like they'd already been existing as queer and expressing that queerness "before I even had the terms to come out to myself" and is now working on catching up on the conscious end of figuring out what's what. I myself never really had an official "coming out", I just became increasingly visually/socially/vocally queer as I became more and more confident in who I was and what I wanted to be and who I had on some level always been, and decided if people didn't get the hint that's their own problem. I came into consciousness of my queerness during the early 2010s original tumblr MOGAI microlabel boom, where there was a ton of focus on figuring out the hyper specific identity labels that exactly described what you were experiencing. I did a lot of digging and soul searching and experienced a lot of unnecessary stress trying and failing to find my perfect labels and landed on clumsy terms like "full time drag queen" because it was the closest I could get to what I was feeling about my gender, only to be told it was problematic for me to call myself that as an AFAB person because drag "belongs to cis gay men" (don't get me started on that statement, that's a whole other essay lol) It was a real wake up call once I distanced from these aggressively labeled and segmented online spaces and made my way into real world queer communities where I was relieved to find that in fact no one there asks to check your membership card before letting you in, if you feel like you belong there you're welcome no questions asked.

I had other people in these communities referring to me as "queer" and "fag" and "gay" and "queen" before I felt comfortable doing so myself based on online Discourse I'd experienced over who is Allowed to use certain terms, and having these community leaders I respected recognizing those things in me and welcoming me in like that gave me the confidence to really find my own footing in ways that attempting to find my exact correct identity label so that I could officially proclaim it never did. Once I could answer the question of what I was with a shrug and "queer I guess!" things became so much easier. Microlabels can be incredibly helpful and liberating for some, don't get me wrong if it works for you that's great, but let's not pretend that everyone is going to have the same experiences.

So anyway, back to Noel. Noel has never, to my knowledge, ever had any sort of official “coming out” or explicitly referred to himself as queer. So I know there are people out there who will disagree with me considering him to be queer. But so much of what he’s said and done throughout his several decades long career has indicated to me that this is clearly someone of queer experience navigating the world as such, and just as the queers in my local community welcomed me as one of them before I knew to do it myself, I extend that welcome forward. 

Let’s take a look at some of the facts. In the public span of his career, Noel has.....(in no particular order, also if anyone wants to add additional instances of note in the reblogs or comments please feel free, this is by no means a fully comprehensive list) -repeatedly called himself "the woman of the Boosh" or Julian's/Howard's "wife" in ways that suggest that's how he actually felt about it rather than it just being a punchline that he was mistaken for female in the show [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] -referred to himself at the GQ "Man of the Year" awards as "never been a man" and "a sort of girl, he/she" -been referred to by Sandi Toksvig as being "on the cusp" in regards to gender, to which he reacts with amusement and acceptance -consistently expressed excitement and appreciation when others refer to him with feminine terms or say he looks like a girl [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] -said "I love being a man-woman, it's much more interesting than being one or the other" and expressed that the loved shooting the Boosh Electro episode for this reason -referred to Vince Noir (a character who he's been pretty open about being based on himself) as "wasn't seemingly one gender or the other" -expressed that he felt most free and happy when presenting femininely [2] -had Julian, one of the people closest to him, express that Noel and Sandi (an out lesbian) may have "real sexual chemistry" because Noel is "all over the shop, he's a different sex" -used the "Confuser" line of "Is it a boy? Is it a girl? I'm not sure I mind" to refer to himself rather than Vince, and express that he's had to work to find new ways to feel as androgynous as he'd like now that he's older -referred to himself as a lesbian [2] -said that he "sometimes looks in the mirror and sees a woman", in the same interview that Julian implies that Noel is in fact a girl -referred to himself as a "girl/boy" -consistently referred to himself with feminine terms on panel shows and bakeoff -made a joke on bakeoff about not being a testosterone-based person -responded positively when asked about the ways Boosh had influenced queer and nonbinary youth -has said he's "quite obsessed with the man/woman mixup thing" -has said if he was an animal he'd want to be a seahorse because the males get pregnant -Had Lee Mack, who Noel used to live with, refer to him as "the little transsexual one, yeah I think she's fantastic" in a Boosh documentary and "a young lady who came out here happy to be herself" in response to Noel's Wuthering Heights drag performance -had his own mother refer to him as "the daughter I always wanted" -described his own appearance as that of a "transsexual witch" and when an interviewer attempted to make fun of him for calling himself "a transgender witch" by showing Noel a drawing the interviewer clearly found repulsive, Noel responded that the interviewer was "holding up a mirror" and called the image his passport photo

And I'm not even going to bother citing sources on the countless times he's made comments suggesting romantic or sexual attraction towards men. Literally just watch any non-character appearance he's ever done, it's kind of his whole thing??? Not to mention his penchant for picking up explicitly queer and gnc character roles, and also just [gestures vaguely to everything Noel and Julian have said about each other suggesting romantic and sexual tension between them and how they used their characters as an excuse to explore those feelings in a less scary way, again that could be a whole other essay on its own but ooh boy] I also think there's something interesting to explore in the idea of Noel repeatedly referring to his appearance as transgender or transsexual rather than identifying himself as such- at what point does the appearance of something become reality?

It all begs the question- is it even a joke anymore if it's that consistent? Either it's not a joke and it's an authentic expression of his real feelings and experiences, or he for some reason really really wants everyone to believe that he's queer when he's not, with this behavior spanning back to a time before the concept of queerbaiting was on anyone's minds and when being publicly queer could mean the end of your career. Which scenario do you think is more likely? And, does someone who’s been conducting themself like this for their entire career really NEED to come out? Honestly, I find this level of simultaneous authenticity and inscrutability aspirational.

In this Velvet Onion interview from 2012, Noel compares his penchant for dresses to both Grayson Perry and Eddie Izzard. This is interesting because those two people represent pretty opposite intentions behind their presentation- Grayson identifies solidly as cis male, and for him the shock value of crossdressing is the point, saying “I signed up for a gender and I want them to be very clearly delineated so I know I’m dressing up in the wrong clothes.” This doesn't seem particularly in line with where Noel is coming from given him famously referring to himself as "the Confuser" and stating in that same Velvet Onion interview that he "never even bothered giving it a label, I never went oh I'm a transvestite, I just went yeah if I fancy wearing a dress I do, never really thought about it really" Eddie on the other hand has famously said "They're not women's clothes. They're my clothes, I bought them." indicating that they were a genuine part of her authentic expression rather than a crossdressing costume, and has subsequently over the years identified more and more solidly as transfemme. I find Eddie's trajectory particularly fascinating because it's been so non-linear. In the 90s when the language for transness was much less public knowledge, she referred to herself consistently as a transvestite- a cishet man who enjoyed dressing as a woman, as well as using terms like "male tomboy" and "male lesbian" and "a full boy plus extra girl". Despite doing most of her standup shows in femme looks, most of her acting jobs were male-presenting, and there was a period of time in the 2010s where she dropped the femme presentation entirely in an attempt to be taken more seriously as the "crossdressing" was seen by many as a gimmick. Swinging back around more recently, Eddie has been explicitly identifying as genderfluid and transfemme, and in recent years has made the decision to "be based in girl mode from now on", and use primarily she/her pronouns. Since this announcement, in her trans advocacy work Eddie has described herself as being "out" as trans since the 1980s despite all of the above. She always knew who she was, it's just she's gotten access to more accurate terms over time to describe what she was experiencing, as well as feeling more safe to do so the more that transness became a known and accepted concept in the public eye.

The interview I mentioned at the very start of this post isn't really a coming out from Noel. And I don't think we'll ever really get one from him. In my opinion Noel has spent the past several decades conducting himself as someone who is in fact already out- it’s pretty clear Noel knows and is proud of who he is regardless of how he chooses to describe that identity. At this point, making some sort of official statement would just be for the benefit of others looking for clarification on their own perception of him and people who want to be able to put him in one box or another, and that’s not what coming out should be. The statement in the new interview is not "I am genderfluid", its "I've always been genderfluid", simply putting an accurate name to what's always been publicly visibly true now that he's got the terms to do so.

[taradactylus]

Been off from tumblr a bit but I just wanna share my general thoughts about TSAMS, especially today's episode...

‼️Quick warning for suicide and self harm mention‼️

I feel betrayed. I legit cried. Out of embarassment, betrayal, and pure but well-reserved anger.

I'm not going to be quiet about how to show handled Sun's problem. Not one fucking media type ever dares to normally bring up suicidal problems, the people who suffer from this, the amount of kids and adults who DIE from such thoughts. This isn't about the overly edgy teenagers who want to normalize cutting yourself is okey and cool. This is about the people who suffered for months and years with such conditions while the world made fun of them or ignored their calls for help. Ignored the signs.

USA doesn't have much of a public transport where the show is going on. But here we do. And a lot of trains are late every day. Late for hours because of "mechanical issues". 8 out of 10 times the mechanical issue is a local kid who jumped front of the train. A teenager fed up with life. An adult who lost their way. An ederly too impatient for death.

I have waited months. Months. To see how Sun deals with it. A character I fell in love with not in a romantic sense, a character who shared way too many of my own problems from hallucinations from abuse till betrayal. A character who was pushed and pulled their entire life around people who slapped you then said they love you. I wanted to see how he heals out from it.

The signs were there. Everywhere. Sun said it out loud once that he at least fantasized about death. EVEN OLD MOON KNEW ABOUT THIS! He literally told New Moon Sun would be capable of doing it.

So why... why through Miku, the character used as the "weird fandom girl" symbol do they bring up such a delicate topic? A topic that is not delicate because you have to tip toe around the people who live with self destructive thoughts day and night, but delicate because it matters to be properly heard out AND NO ONE LISTENS!

Not one fucking media listens. A lot of us out there rely on fandoms. Stories we can escape to because the world never listens. And call me a self-projector all you want dear creators or whoever writes the story, but you either just pulled the cheapest and most dumbest way to close off a story line with solving Sun's problems off-screen, or you just legit don't give a fuck about people who "self-projected".

Honestly, what if I did? What if in a sense, I saw myself in Sun? A Sunshine of a character ruined and changed by the things that happened to him. Am I not allowed to relate to him? Am I an annoying "fan-girl" for caring about how he heals because I myself have no idea how to do it either? Or am I like Miku for hoping someone calls out on his behaviour because that's something I've wanted my entire life and never got?

And here I am, still somehow hoping Sun is lying. That he is in denial. That there is more to what was shown... but honestly? How long should I wait and hope while the character I started to like is now becoming a bit too toxic?

And with all due respect, I'm taking this episode personally. The creators watch the fandom. Probably have their secret accounts to see what the people theorize. And if Sun is not lying, and suicide is an annoying topic and we are self-projecting too much onto Sun, with all due respect, dear creators... grow the fuck up and educate yourself.

I don't need the world to pity my ass for having self-harming habits, wishing to die and even attempted suicide before (I'm getting my ass to therapy in the meantime so do not worry about me), but all I want from content creators to fucking educate themselfes before bringing up such topics. TO CARE A BIT MAYBE?!

I have survived my worst times, but not everyone does (it's not about who is weaker or stronger, only utter guilt held me back, without that I'd be long gone), andI want for those who has no help feel like they're heard and seen. Cause literally that's all itt takes sometimes to maybe save someone's life.

So yeah. I'm utterly disappointed in this episode. Not because I want the world to know that I'm suicidal and everyone should tip toe around me and "omg pls give me attention" ect ect ect...

Im disappointed because I had hopes for TSAMS to maybe, maybe be an example and bring this topic up normally for a change. But well... here goes my hope for an educational approach of suicide and self harm in a popular show.

[justplainwhump]

Deserved

Angel is punished.

Inspired by the wonderful @angst-after-dark, Thane and Dami are their characters.

Angel Masterlist

Content / warning: BBU, BBU Romantic, conditioned whumpee, implied future noncon, threats, multiple whumpees.

The pet - Angel - is ready for her master. She always is, just as she's meant to be. Yet, somehow, it never seems to be enough. She never seems to enough.

Something is stirring inside her, something she knows shouldn't. Good pets aren't meant to be angry. Good pets aren't disappointed. Good pets are grateful, enduring, beautiful.

She reaches for the eyeliner in front of her to adjust her makeup again, as she's done so often, in the hours she spends waiting. The beauty products Sir gets her are luxurious, she knows for some reason. The best money can buy. Just as she herself is a luxury to be kept. She's grateful for it, as a good pet should be, she thinks. At least, this make up won't mess with her skin, however often she applies and reapplies it.

The pet stares into the mirror, meets her own gaze, follows the lines of her wide smile, searches for answers in the perfectly framed dark eyes that seem so foreign to her. There's nothing there. Nothing but a longing, sad despair.

"It's not fair," a voice says behind her.

She almost breaks off the tip of the eyeliner.

Sir's other pet, Damiel, is standing behind her in the doorway, catching her gaze in the mirror. There's a hard line around their mouth. They don't smile. They rarely do. Herself, she always does.

"You shouldn't be here." Damiel's voice is low, but firm.

The pet neatly puts the cap back on the eyeliner and puts it back down, silent.

Across the mirror, Damiel's gaze runs over her bare back, and she knows what they see. Scars, beginning to form. Bruises. The new brand over her tailbone, the one that Damiel themself burned into her skin.

They swallow. "You deserve better."

The pet tilts her head. "Like what?" she asks slowly. "Like, to be loved by my owner? Loved, as he loves you?"

"Not that." They shrug. "Better."

"Sir decides, what his pets deserve."

"You're not meant to be Sir's pet."

She stands up and turns around, bites back a wince when the skin strains around the burn on her back. Her smile doesn't waver. She can easily breathe through the pain in her body. The pain throbbing behind her temples at their words is more difficult to deal with.

Her hand wanders up on her chest, to the older brand, the one over her heart, the one spelling Sir's initials, the one carried over from a past life she doesn't remember.

"But I am," she whispers. "I belong to him. I was made for him."

They frown, softly shaking their head. "He-"

"You're late, Damiel." Their owner appears in the doorframe, and the pet drops to her knees. His gaze only grazes over her for a moment, before it settles on them. Always them. Always Damiel. They're a bad pet, she thinks. They're a bad pet, saying bad things, while she's good, and still he has only eyes for them.

"Angel." She shivers, when he does say her name, his voice low and cold. "What took you so long? Did Damiel say something to upset you?"

It's a trick question. It doesn't matter what she says. He's her owner. He'll decide if it's right or wrong, if she's punished or not.

And she'll always be wrong. She'll always be punished.

Does she deserve better? She's not sure. It's odd, that Damiel is.

"Forgive me, Sir," she says softly. Lies. "They didn't. It was my fault. I smeared my eyeliner. I wanted to be pretty for you."

He reaches out for her chin, carefully tilts her head up to face him. "Oh my stupid whore Angel. They got into your little head that far already?" He runs his thumb over her lip, laughs sharply when she readily opens her mouth for him. "You're mine, Angel. Damiel is mine. They're here because I love them. And you, you are here because you deserve it."

His thumb presses onto her face, smearing her lipstick. "You are pretty for me, when your make up is a mess, Angel. You're pretty for me when you're crying and begging and suffering. You were bad, Angel, before you came here. Very bad. A slut who disrespected me. And now the two of you are disrespecting me again."

He leans in. "Tell me, bitch. What is it you deserve?"

She meets his gaze, looks into the sparkling light eyes she wants to love so desperately. I don't know, a part of her wants to yell. I don't know what I deserve, but neither should anyone else. But that part of her never wins. It knows how to stay silent, and to give in to the comfort of clear and simple answers that make the world so much simpler. That she deserves whatever Thane Barlow wants to give her. And he always wants one thing.

"I deserve punishment," she whispers.

Sir smiles and lightly pats her cheek, as he turns to the other pet. "That's right, Damiel, don't you agree? Our stupid Angel deserves punishment, because she got so confused, she forgot the hierarchy in this household. A good whipping, maybe. 20 lashes. You do it, Damiel. And when you deliver her to my bed later, and I look at that well shaped backside of hers, I expect to see that you didn't hold back." He smiles. "I expect to see you gave her what she deserves."

Their pause is tiny, but the pet notices it still.

"Yes," Damiel says then. "Yes, Sir."

---

-

Angel tag list (ask to be added or removed): @whumplr-reader

[queer-literature-polls]

Have you read this queer webcomic?

Reason: Many queer characters Genre: Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Romance, Comedy, Horror, Thriller, Epic/whatever homestuck is Average rating: uhh.. I dunno. there's enough superfans to know that you may like it.

notes and review under the cut!

Notes:

There are only 2 characters confirmed to be heterosexual (John and Jane) and the rest are either bisexual, gay/lesbian, or asexual. two prominent romantic relationships that happen on screen are both wlw and mlm

-

LOTS of queer characters in it that are generally written pretty well. rose lalonde and kanaya maryam are dating. dirk strider and jake english dated too. dave strider is queer and has an overcoming toxic masculinity arc. being attracted to the same gender is so normal for trolls that they don't even have a word for being gay or straight or anything because they do not care. most trolls are technically polyamorous also. two characters (june egbert and vriska serket) have been confirmed by Word Of God to be trans girls, and the writers of the ongoing ("dubiously canon") sequel have been talking about june actually coming out and transitioning in the near(?) future. also, one of the characters (roxy lalonde) in said sequel is a gnc trans guy. this paragraph is not comprehensive.

Review: I think it’s amazingly well written, funny, fun to read and the foreshadowing is super surprisingly mine blowing despite originally being dictated by the fan base before the author took over themself. It starts to get iffy near the end though in my opinion lol but the ride to get there is well worth it

-

i like it a normal amount (lie). sometimes it sucks badly, but everyone already knows that.

[vasito-de-leche]

;R1999 PAVIA - General Headcanons

Compilation of headcanons and analysis on Pavia as a character and other related things.

the post about Pavia's love languages and how he shows his affection got a lot of love, so I'm doing a lil more thinking into his character to rlly flesh out how I see and write him before getting to write the second part of that post <3

just a heads up, its preeeetty fucking long. but all of my posts tend to be lmfao

On the subject of Pavia, loneliness and trauma.

In this post talked about the concept of showing affection (not exclusively romantic but just in general) and the relationship Pavia has with his reputation, both as a lone wolf and a skilled mercenary, which affect the way he interacts with those he might deem close for better and for worse. So it's only fair that I do that again in a more general context.

Let's get this out of the way. One cannot talk about Pavia without mentioning or alluding to his solitary lifestyle in some way or another, we've all read his 02 Story, but to only read him as someone who fakes this aura of confidence and who feels deeply insecure and lonely 24/7 is an obvious disservice to his character.

Pavia is defined by a strong sense of self which, yes, originates from isolation and neglect. And you may read this as an active choice for survival, a coping and defense mechanism or the natural progress of someone who has had no one to rely on but themself - all of these readings are valid and can easily coexist! But I would like to insist that Pavia as we know him is confident and comfortable in his own skin, happy to live as an outlier to conventional norms and behaviour.

And that's because he's weaponized loneliness into a strength and a shield. He's outgrown that small, neglected child in the basement.

Hell, in his interview with Pandora Wilson, he mentions the fun of "causing pain" onto others, in the context of his presence being used as a "punishment" for others. He's surrounded by people he considers stupid, and he has fun at their expense when they try to bring him into their shenanigans. Pavia is a confident asshole, it is not a façade for a sad boy.

One quote in particular comes to mind when discussing this aspect of Pavia.

Go back to Rome, where the wolves were born. Said my former boss. He knew I was born in Rome, but didn't know I was raised in Piemonte. He was such a fool, even tried to kill me. So I only kept his tie clip. I didn't tell him that as long as the night will come, everywhere I live is Piemonte.

This line in particular, from my reading on it, speaks volumes about how Pavia has reclaimed the night - alluding to the one place he was forced to live in for his entire childhood, a dark and isolated basement, the concept of loneliness itself - as something that defines him and should inspire fear into others. His wolves are made out of darkness, his Ultimate in-game shows him manifesting out of a dark fog on the ground. And the context of that quote is hostile, it's Pavia's former boss telling him to go back to Rome, and Pavia mentioning that no matter where he goes, as long as the night comes, he's home.

One could argue that the quote is meant to be read differently - instead of Pavia reclaiming something that hurt him to now empower him, he's haunted by it. No matter where he goes, he'll always be in Piemonte, in that dark and isolated basement, with no one to pull him out. And that's fair! To each their own, both are banger readings on that dialogue. I just personally think the former fits better with the character as a whole.

The former reading is also supported by his 02 Story, where he describes the wolves that his Arcanum abilities manifested as "friends he found in the darkness and would never leave him".

One wolf hid behind another, and the pack surrounded him in the darkness of the night. They held each other's heads and tails and coiled together like snakes, bringing with them warmth and restful sleep. These were the friends he found in the darkness, ones who would never abandon or leave him, and who would forever watch over him.

In his Cover profile, his Afflatus is also "Mourning of the Feral Pack [Beast] Night View".

And when you check Pavia's small description in the Role Garment menu, his main garment and the one unlocked at Insight II form the following phrase:

He's always alone, both in the basement and on the street. It doesn't matter now, though. He will never be "alone" from now on.

His Afflatus, his Arcanum abilities, every small detail - everything points towards Pavia owning the night and the darkness that used to hurt him so much as a child. Because it cannot hurt him now that he's made friends with it, in the form of shadow wolves who will never leave him. He's not stuck here with you, you're stuck him with him. (that Insight II quote will be relevant again later when I talk about the lack of? Humanity? so to speak? in Pavia's character)

But anyway! This doesn't mean that the discussion on Pavia and loneliness/isolation should stop there.

After all, his Afflatus also says "Mourning of the Feral Pack" - mourn what exactly? A lost childhood? The family he could've had if his mother hadn't been admitted to an asylum? The young and innocent child that died in that basement so that the current Pavia could exist?

Who knows! Talk about it, it's fun and I love to read other people's takes! <3

On the subject of trauma specifically, I do see Pavia as someone who lives in the present and doesn't think much about the past - he only mentions his parents once in a seemingly disinterested manner, stating that he never visited (and most likely will never visit) his mother. Piemonte is where his abusive aunt raised him, but he shows a certain pride in his city anyway.

It's not that he's overcome and healed from his trauma, it's that he doesn't even register the things that happened to him as traumatic experiences due to the distance and recontextualization of everything.

The fandom portrayal of Pavia as a deeply lonely person often comes hand in hand with him being touchstarved and the experience of feeling any semblance of genuine human connection for the very first time - but I would like to offer an alternative, explained in the next bullet point.

On the subject of Pavia, conventional society and his pack of wolves.

Pavia's official description, as seen in this tweet made by the official global account of the game, is the following:

An independent mercenary lacking in collaborative skills. Employers are content with his excellent abilities, but can't stand his work ethic of ignoring his coworkers.

This, along with his other quotes and the interview with UTTU, point towards how the world sees Pavia as a nuisance of sorts - a punishment, we know this - but it also points towards Pavia's rejection of conventional society.

The way Pavia behaves, the way he insists on maintaining the barrier between himself and conventional society, the pleasure he takes in making others suffer just by BEING THERE NEXT TO THEM, the stress he puts into being alone - it leads me to think that THIS is the result of his trauma.

It's not a deep seated loneliness, it's not yearning and secretly wishing for genuine connections, it's not a fear of the dark or enclosed spaces - it's an absolute and total rejection of the world that failed him.

Pavia cannot feel or grasp loneliness on the same level as other characters might because there is not a single person in this world he would rather spend his time with other than himself. The details of how he got out of the basement and began a life of crime haven't been revealed yet, so I won't theorize about it, but I like to think that everything that Pavia is and represents is one big "fuck you" to a world that left him to rot in that basement.

It all loops back to the previous point - by rejecting mankind and society as a whole, Pavia becomes the opposite: a beast who acts on his own accord rather than the rules that make up polite society. And in doing so, grows closer to himself and his pack. In doing so, he allows his humanity to slowly slip away.

The Insight II quote I mentioned before is a great example of this - the change in his sprites shows Pavia's eyes changing, now with black sclera and sharper teeth, darkness (and two of his wolves) surrounding him. He will never be "alone" from now on because he is now ONE of the pack, because this is where he belongs.

The medium for his Arcanum (not the "wand" used to cast spells and magic, those are different things from what I understand) is "Beast Teeth". Compare this with other characters: Zima's medium are poems, Dikke's medium is the law, Sonetto's medium is curiosity. An arcanist's medium seems to be a concept or object that represents who they are and what they believe in, something that is essential to their life and dear to their core. Pavia's is beast teeth. He's a beast Arcanist.

I like to think that Pavia based his behaviour, knowingly or not, on his pack of wolves. After all, he's the one who conjured them, it makes sense to me that he would subconsciously latch onto them. This would explain his more animalistic traits that show just how disconnected Pavia is from what a regular human being should be.

You guys freak me out when you sleep. What kind of people needs such a long sleep like that? Fall in a coma like a crispy critter, and wake up 8 hours later. …Only god knows how you can do that.

This dialogue implies that Pavia cannot wrap his head around a normal sleeping schedule - which is extremely ironic, considering that wolves sleep a LOT. But I'd attribute this more to the dissonance between him and conventional society than Pavia trying to larp as a wolf. We have to understand that he spent most of his days sleeping away the hunger, that he went on to reject the company of other people - it makes sense to me that he wasn't taught or didn't get to see how a normal person should behave in theory.

Despite this rejection, we can clearly see that Pavia enjoys a very hedonistic life - going on clubs, having a sweet tooth, wearing fancy clothes, shopping, films and whatnot (He's literally wearing Louboutins, guys. The soles of his shoes are RED). He plays the role of mercenary quite well, too. But it doesn't strike me as a writing inconsistency or hypocrisy from his part, Pavia is known for doing whatever he wants, one of his hand tattoos spells "LIBERTA" or freedom in italian, so this tracks. It's hard to be a hypocrite when your moral compass is all about being a wildcard.

I mentioned this in my first Pavia post, but the items attributed to him are all said to be cheap, fake or crudely hand-made.

His glasses are a copy of an actual Italian brand that no one would ever think of mistaking for the real thing, his bracelets and rings are dented and damaged, Pandora Wilson even goes as far as calling it junk. They even describe his earrings as rough workmanship. And yet, Pavia brags about his clothes and enjoys shopping. There's that small dissonance again - he enjoys bragging but does not know (or care) about the actual value or authenticity of his material possessions. (Pavia wears fake Louboutins, this is my headcanon, thanks for coming)

He plays the role of mercenary quite well, too. I'd also argue that the more violent aspects of his personality have to do with his line of work. This tweet confirms the majority of Pavia's tattoos and what they say - the one on his arm is "La Cosa Nuova", the sicilian mafia for those who didn't know. I won't go in-depth about the real life actions of such group, but it's clear that Pavia is or has been part of it within the world of Reverse: 1999.

Entering headcanon territory.

The two bullet points from before were mostly just analysis on how I read Pavia based on all evidence in-game, but now I get to talk about personal headcanons I have about him <3

I've explained pretty much everything I wanted to say about Pavia for now, so these are just gonna be rapid fire headcanons.

First of all, Pavia is a light sleeper.

The lightest sleeper you'll ever meet, even a soft whisper could wake him up - but this isn't because of some hidden fear of waking up back in his aunt's basement. Because he had nothing to focus on but the sounds within that basement, he greatly developed his hearing and his Insight II development further heightened his senses. Pavia is used to dark, silent spaces, so any unknown noise will put him on edge and wake him up. Sometimes, he pretends to sleep to get out of doing work.

Contrary to popular belief, he doesn't move at ALL when sleeping and tends to stay in the same position throughout the night.

This is something he learned, rather than something that comes naturally, because he tends to sleep with the pack and there's little space to move without accidentally kicking Andrea or Leon in the face.

Next. Pavia doesn't know that he resembles his mother a lot.

As for his mother, there are two possibilities: One, she's truly dead and he doesn't know, based on his 02 Story where his aunt confirms that Pavia's mother died a few years later, as well as Pavia's dialogue in which he talks about his mother as if she were alive. Two, she was alive the whole time and Pavia found out years later that she was committed to an asylum and his dialogue about his parents is correct.

Regardless, I like to think that he never saw her again once he was taken into his aunt's care, and that she never told him that the reason she put him in that basement was because he looks so similar to her "deceased" sister. Since they weren't there to raise him and he didn't hear anything about them from his aunt, Pavia holds no resentment and no love towards his parents, because they're total strangers to him.

Next. His wolves' names are interchangeable.

Pavia cares for his pack, and the wolves care for him in return - they were created for that very reason after all. Their dynamic and relationship is a mystery to everyone and it's much too complex to even put into words, but because they're still magical constructs he creates, their behaviour and individuality relies heavily on Pavia's skills as an Arcanist.

There are days in which it's very easy to confuse them, and there are days when it's very obvious how to tell them apart. He's had years to perfect them, to "raise" them if you will.

While the pack might not be around 24/7, they're always in the back of his mind. He can also communicate with them because of it. They don't mind if Pavia confuses them, but if someone else does it? Prepare to get bitten to death, I guess!

[valentine-cafe]

Can i ask for Orion, since i saw your latest post, what if reader was so grateful to have him and his affirmations, but started crying because they're not used to such gentleness and adoration before? Eventhough they show him affection a lot, receiving it would turn into them being overwhelmed and emotional?

. ˚◞♡ 𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒇𝒖𝒍 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖 ꒰ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒃𝒚𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒍 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒍 ꒱◞ ₊˚

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ᥫ᭡ orion / reader ꒱ you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by his love for you - it wasn't something you were accustomed to. but one day you burst

𖹭. content warnings◞  hurt/comfort . 0.9k

𖹭. receipts◞  fluffy orion is the best hhhh

. ˚◞ ꒰ 🍰 𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒌𝒔 ꒱ m.list . guidelines . characters . lorebook ⊹ ۪ ࣪ 

he’d seen the tears spill before you even registered it yourself. a praise to you, was all he had given. telling you how good you were doing and how proud of you he was for your immense progress and improvement in your mental health.

it wasn’t something you were used to receiving. you’d always been the giver, but ever since you’d met this. . . bright light here in the dark of the abyss and even before. you’d sworn that your world had felt more whole than it ever had.

you clung onto your past still. wondering if it’d go away, wondering if maybe. if you were cautious, you’d watch him change his behavior around you.

he never did, other than his endless love for you growing. his care and his patience. it was an overwhelming deal. you’d been able to hold back tears in the past, wave him off and tell him you appreciate all of his kind gestures and patience.

it was the way he looked at you, with such a love in his eyes. platonically and romantically. you’d never thought someone could have that much love for you or the world in their heart at the same time, but here he was.

“my dear?” he’d hum softly, wiping away the tear with a gently swipe of his thumb against your closed eyelid. smiling in the same way he touched you, ever so softly. with his eyes carrying concern for you.

“what’s wrong?” you felt his wings drape around you at his question. arms pulling you in and sitting you down close to him. hand brushing your hair carefully.

“just. . . ‘m not used to uh. . .” your voice shakes, a sniffle and sob following right after. and you curse yourself for showing it, but at the same time. it feels good to, with him especially.

you feel safe and secure. more than you ever have.

and when you look up at him, eyes teary. while you are surrounded by his feathers that remind you of the night sky with the gold in them being the stars.

he gives you all but a reassuring look and nods, whispering a small: “go on.” urging you to talk.

“I just—” you inhale sharply and sob.

“I just need to get used to feeling loved, and safe. I don’t remember the last I felt this cared for. I don’t think I have felt it.” you allow yourself to speak, looking down with shame. yet deep inside, something feels like it’s being unclogged. relief washing over you bit by bit.

“a-and. . . i get scared, worried. at times. that you’ll ponder me pathetic. stare at me and see nothing but a weak individual who wants to love people but can’t even love themself.”

a moment of silence goes by, and you think you’ve said all the wrong things. your breath stopping, only to continue when you feel him blowing air into your face. your eyes rushing up to look back into his in shock.

“who says you are that?” he hums, giving you a compassionate, empathetic smile.

“yourself? then I do not think you should listen.” he chuckles softly, shaking his head and pulling you up in his lap. hands caressing your face gently.

“my love, if you have been told you are such things in the past. leave it in the past and let those who have told you this envy you for who you are today.” you feel a wing gently rub against your back, soothing you and your cries and sobs. helping you focus.

“for all they will ever be, are insecure and self absorbed piles of. . . well pardon my language. faeces.” he sighs out and hugs you close.

“you are too good for them, for their words to get to you. my love.” he hums, pressing a tender kiss against your temple and nuzzling his face into your hair.

“you never have to sit and worry of such things when you are here. I am here for you always, that will never change.”

your sobs halt, and you hear him sigh fondly once more.

“cry, darling. allow yourself to. you are worthy of it too. worthy of feeling”

and it doesn’t take long for the tears to spill from your eyes and run down your flushed cheeks like streams of water.

your heart clenches and you feel yourself letting go. for the first time in years. no restriction, no hesitation. just letting yourself go.

“there we go. . . good, very good. of course, my love, remember to breathe. please? come, breathe with me. inhale,” he draws in a big gulp of air and exhales together with you. “and exhale” he says in the middle of everything.

“and again.”

as the both of you continue to breathe, and you allow yourself to let out the remainders of your bundled up sadness and fears. the scene fades, leaving the two of you to eventually sit and chuckle with each other. speaking of fond times.

while the warmth of his arms stays around you.

for as long as you need.

𖹭. taglist◞ wanna join the taglist? fill out this form

𖹭. remember◞ you make a writer's day every time you like, reblog and/or comment on their piece. if you enjoyed my work, please considering doing so<3

. ˚◞ ꒰ 🍰 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒖𝒑𝒑𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒖𝒔 ꒱ tip jar . masterist ⊹ ۪ ࣪

[aggro-my-beloved]

Rocks at My Window - Guy x Honey Blurb

note: just guy being guy...i'm on that mushy gushy shit. honey and guy are high school sweethearts your honor pairing: guy x gn!honey summary: guy pays honey a visit while they're grounded, but he's not sneaking them out this time... wc: 802

Staring at the same four walls for nearly three weekends was becoming tiresome for Honey. How their parents managed to transform this bedroom into a twisted form of solitary confinement with one swift scolding and angry finger directed at their bedroom door is beyond them. They remember thinking during their sulking trudge to their room: How bad could it be? It's only for a month. 

“This is torture,” They declare to the book smothering their face. The pages, smelling faintly of vanilla and Guy’s cologne, mock them. Forty-odd pages in have them regretting borrowing this book from him. If the slowly building romantic tension was not enough for Honey to lose their mind, the small notes he had written in the margins for Honey to discover were doing the job splendidly. Horrible decisions made between the starring characters being illustrated, with the promise scrawled beside it that we’re doing this one day, made something swelter deep inside the pits of their stomach. Their fingers twitch and almost lose grasp of the book because of their sheer longing to text him, admire his contact picture, the lock screen, and the matching home screen, as well as the shrine of photos featuring Guy they have collected over the years. 

A thought tickles the back of Honey's mind of how easy it would be to slip down the hall and scope out their parents' bedroom for their confiscated phone. They’ll be gone for another couple of hours, the imaginary devil on their shoulder (sounding eerily similar to her significant other) whispers. Just put it back where you find it, and they’ll never know.

Don’t you dare, the figment angel butts in, remember what got you into this mess in the first place?

And how could they forget? Sneaking out with Guy past curfew had been the most fun they had all semester, even if the results were splintered hands from the local park's brutally dry mulch. That was the last time Guy convinces them to jump off the swingset into an “epic tuck and roll." Still, Honey caught themself in a daze whenever their mind wandered to that night and the whispered conversations shared between the two about their future. While the one-month grounding may have not been worth it in Honey's eyes, the healing callouses on their hands were well-earned. 

They turn their attention back to the book with another longing sigh. As they pick it up to resume their current paragraph, a bitter taste fills their mouth--an envious poison they must choke down. 

“Where are the rocks at my window, huh?” They huff with a petty roll of their eyes. 

Moments later, a blood-curdling scream rattles the room as Honey witnesses the sight of broken glass scattered across their bedroom floor alongside a rather large rock. Panic-stricken and swift, they shuffle over to their closet, trapezing over the clear shards in search of the small, wooden baseball bat from their days in junior league. 

“Oh shit!” They hear a voice mutter from outside which perks their ears with familiarity. 

“Oh no he didn’t.” All too quickly, Honey is dropping the bat in exchange for their fleece-lined boots. Now armored and intent to maim, they march to the shattered opening on their wall and poke their head out to be met with the sight of their antsy boyfriend looking frantically around him. 

“Honey…” his voice trails off, “you should really get better landscaping around here. Maybe rocks that are more flat and not so…boulder-like.”

“Guy, what the hell? You could have knocked. My parents are out for the night.” 

“Hey, hey–excuse me for trying to be a little romantic here! And before you get too upset with me,” he holds out a flat, rectangular box, reading Max’s Rustic Pizza and filling their nostrils with the delectable aroma of garlic and tomato sauce, “I brought you your favorite.”  Guy offers a sheepish grin and harbors red cheeks. It leaves Honey floored at how easy it is to forgive him for his earnest, yet absurd trespasses.

"As romantic as this all is," they assure him with a playful scoff, "I can't sneak out with you again. Not unless you're willing to join me in another month of imprisonment." The suggestion makes Guy's smile turn larger and more villainous. 

“Who says you’re sneaking out? I’m sneaking in,” he announces with a devious chuckle. A hum is emitted from Honey, followed by an innocent enough tilt of their head. 

“Oh yeah, lover boy? You and what ladder?” Guy’s promising smile falls at the major hole in his plan (minus the gaping one in what was Honey's window) is revealed to him. He looks around, similar to a lost puppy who'd trekked too far from home amidst a car chase. 

"Honey, do you have a ladder I could borrow?"