#of course my mind creates this reaction
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deeplovelydark · 4 months ago
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need to tell my parents something but maybe killing myself is easier?
#suicide mention#the irony is that they will punish me for my 'fuck up' but my fuck up is a direct consequence of being mentally ill#so once again I will be punished for being mentally ill which will make me even more mentally ill#every time I've tried to tell my mother about my mental illness#and that only happened two times because I know how she'll react#and I didn't even mention having disorders I just talked about one of the symptoms#her reaction was vile and accusatory and she blamed me for being 'weak' or inventing my symptoms#this is the most basic ableist shit imaginable but that doesn't make it hurt any less#I told my mother that I wanted to kill myself and she responded with disgust#who can I turn to when the people who are supposed to help me and guide me are the ones that cause my suffering#and then blame me for it and make it even worse#I'm afraid of my parents I'm afraid of telling them the truth but I don't have the energy to lie#but even the lies won't keep me from being judged and scolded#and that shit makes me want to die#I know that my reaction is not reasonable'#but if I get this shit from them every time I open up or show vulnerability#of course my mind creates this reaction#so that I avoid getting into this situations#but I cannot avoid it and avoiding itself harms me but I also cannot stop because in some cases it's literally a question of my safety#it's insane. I will literally get blamed for being mentally ill#they don't know I'm mentally ill so they'll just think I'm lazy or acting out and they'll blame me for it#but if I told them why I did what I did (or rather didn't do it) they'll blame me for inventing shit and trying to be 'special'#by sabotaging my life#and like. getting into a fight with your parents isn't some world ending thing but it is to me#because I'm fucked in the head#but it's a fucking vicious cycle and now I understand what my ex meant by that#mentally ill girls solidarity haha#🫀
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portgasdwrld · 1 year ago
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★ Hickeys
ೃ⁀➷do they suck (lol) at hickeys, giver or receiver?, how? all answered down below by your beloved Tomie✨
ೃ⁀➷Psss this is a head-canon, take it lightly~
ೃ⁀➷ Suggestive, implied f!reader, NSFW language
ೃ⁀➷ monster trio + Law+ Ace
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: ̗̀➛ Luffy
He’s the type to receive them more than to give
When he realizes he has hickeys, he’s just gonna wonder how it’s even possible and if smth hit his neck during a fight💀
Probably gonna bug Chopper about it, until he brushes him off mentioning it’s nothing
Then when you’re making out and you linger on his neck, it clicks into his mind. He yells a « ooohh, It was you! » after realizing that, it surprises you and you almost bit his skin-
He’s down to try it when you explain that you want them on you too
« You want me to suck your skin a little until it bruises? A bit like when you bruise after a fight? »
« Ugh… not the same but you got the spirit? »
He’s dense, but he tried and he didn’t do as bad as you thought
: ̗̀➛ Law
LMAO?? Wouldn’t he be the type to lowkey hit you with a scientific facts that hickeys can kill you if done wrong🤓😭
Ik he would. Im so sorry😮‍💨
On another note, tbh I feel like he’s just sooo into it, when his mind is fogged by lust. He will be making out with you and damn, he’s now leaving wet kisses all over your neck. That itself, just awaken some type of possessive strike and you’re left with hickeys a bit everywhere.
Will quietly eye them when y’all are cuddling after sex. He won’t comment on it beside if you point them out.
“They look great.”
It would be the most reaction you will get out of him. He’s so hot though- intrusive thoughts but they are real 😔
He doesn’t mind at all if you leave some on him fr. Like if it’s done within the right vibe and y’all are just kicking it and you’re riding him or y’all in lotus position, he might even groan and moan a little louder and curse under his breath.
: ̗̀➛ Sanji
Oh his mouth is ALLL OVERR your body. He’s kissing, praising, leaving hickeys all over your body. On you chest, between your thighs, on you collarbone.
He’s almost in a trance while he loves your body and mark it. He’s gotta to enjoy his pretty lover and you bet he’s gonna make it known that you are his and he’s the lucky man who has you!!
He’s so sweet about it, with sweet compliments, but it’s a bit messy too. Wet patches, mumbles from his muffled lips.
He’s SOOOOO down if you wanna do it on him. He gets very excited and can’t stop smiling and touching your body.
“Yes of course I’m down! Wanna try it rn? We got time yk..”
Best boy 🤧
ೃ⁀➷ Zoro
His neck always has some hickeys from you. He thought he hated it, but he quickly got over it and finds it hot now.
He doesn’t care too much if someone stare at them, but he will throw a curse out with a deadpan expression, if someone made a snarky comment.
He also has this possessive strike, so you bet you’re gonna have some type of bruises-hickeys on your body after y’all are done. Because he doesn’t go easy on you, he will be thrusting deep into you, while silencing you with his fingers deep in your mouth. Along with that, his mouth is nibbling on you neck and all your sensitive spots.
It’s an overstimulating mess.
He smirks satisfied when he sees you marked up, moaning his name and completely lost into his touch.
ೃ⁀➷ Ace
Oh, this man here has the biggest possessive strike out of all the men here.
I touched on the subject a little on my NSFW head canon, but he definitely love giving them. He whines when you do, because he’s apparently allergic to shirts and get slightly annoyed when each of his friends on the ship makes some jokes.
He loves that everyone knows you’re his. Because he gets to have one person for him, that actually feels love toward him and someone he can trust??! That’s the life prize!
Every time he fucks you, he makes sure that hickeys are created everywhere on your body.
He will shower you with attention and cocky comments as he sucks on to your skin.
It’s his specialty😮‍💨
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writers-potion · 7 months ago
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Storyediting Questions to Ask
As You Read the First Draft:
Are there place that surprised you as you read your first draft? - Why do you suppose that is? - Is there material there you'd like to expand?
What are the character really doing in this story? - Might they have issues you haven't explored fully yet?
Look to the places that drag. - These might be scenes where you have avoided dealing with something deeper. - What are the characters really thinking in these places? - What are their passions, frustrations, and desires?
Imagine alternative plotlines. - How might your plot be different if ti headed off on another tangent from various points in the story? - You don't have to follow them, but they might suggest other streams that can flow into the main plot.
Think About Structure:
Does you story play out naturally in three acts?
Is there an immediate disturbance to the Lead's world?
Does the first doorway of no return occur before the one-fifth mark?
Are the stakes being raised sufficiently?
Does the second doorway of no return put the Lead on the path to the climax?
Does the rhythm of the sotyr match your intent? If this is an action novel, does the plot move relentlessly forward? If this is a character-driven novel, do the scenes delve deeply enough?
Are there strongly motivated characters?
Have coincidence been established?
Is something happeing immediately at the beginning? Did you establish a person in a setting with a problem, onfronted with change or threat?
Is the timeline logical?
Is the story too predictable in terms of sequence? Should it be rearranged?
About Your Lead Character:
Is the character memorable? Compelling? Enough to carry a reader all the way through the plot?
A lead character has to jump off the page. Does yours?
Does this character avoid cliches? Is he capable of surprising us?
What's unique about the character?
Is the character's objective strong enough?
How does the character grow over the course of the story?
How does the character demonstrate inner strength?
About Your Opposition:
Is your oppositing character interesting?
Is he fully realized, not just a cardboard cutout?
Is he justified (at least in his own mind) in his actions?
Is he believable?
Is he strong as or stronger than the Lead?
About Your Story's Adhesive Nature:
Is the conflcit between the Lead and opposition crucial for both?
Why can't they just walk away? What holds them together?
About Your Scene:
Are the big scenes big enough? Surprising enough? Can you make them more original, unanticipated, and draw them out for all they are worth?
Is there enough conflict in the scenes?
What is the least memorable scene? Cut it!
What else can be cut in order to move the story relentlessly forward?
Does the climactic scene come too fast (through a writer fatigue)? Can you make it more, write it for all it's worth?
Does we need a new minor subplot to build up a saggin midsection?
About Your Minor Characters:
What is their purpose in the plot?
Are they unique and colorful?
Polishing Questions:
Are you hooking the reader from the beginning?
Are suspenseful scenes drawn out for the ultimate tension?
Can any information be delayed? This creates tension in the reader, always a good thing.
Are there enough surprises?
Are character-reaction scenes deep and interesting?
Read chapter ending for read-on prompts
Are there places you can replace describing how a character feels with actions?
Do I use visual, sensory-laden words?
For a Dialogue Read-Through:
Dialogue is almost always strengthened by cutting words within the lines.
In dialogue, be fair to both sides. Don't give one character all the good lines.
Greate dialogue surprises the reader and creates tension. View it like a game, where the players are trying to outfox each other.
Can you get more conflict into dialogue, even emong allies?
If you like my blog, buy me a coffee☕ and find me on instagram! 📸
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pankielovesfan · 1 month ago
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How would Fan react when learning about the reveal? Read my fun long ramble!
I need to put this down somewhere. Here is my fun not so structured analysis!!!! this is something i think a lot about. of course I do.
I doodled a small little graph of reactions I think he would go through that I will elaborate on further in the paragraphs below. I'm not sure about the order but it'd be something like these stages when processing it - most likely.
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This is analyzed from the idea that Fan did not previously predict this in any way or expect it, but I do also suspect he might know! (Which, I'll explain later for his reaction to that.)
Fan's an incredibly emotional and impulsive person, he would definitely have a strong outer reaction to the information. This may be biased coming from me since Fan is my favorite to analyze but aside from Suitcase he would probably be handling it the worst after being told about it, OR just having the most notable reaction! This is considering he was not made to be a contestant but to devote his love, identity, and purpose to the show, which makes him revolve around the show much more than anyone else - since it is a built-in interest in him that he's dedicated his entire existence to, even when he tried to build himself beyond it- he still surrounds himself with Inanimate Insanity even after his elimination. It is forever tied to his mind and interests contrary to many contestants who try to separate from the show and competition entirely.
Fan's most substantial development in Hatching The Plan was the fact that there were many possibilities out there for him to discover for himself (and that others were there for him through that change and discovery). While he recognizes this and states on Fan's Fantastic Features that he's trying to test his limit and push past his comfort zone (notably while in a safe controlled environment where this change can occur comfortably for him) he is still "stuck" in Inanimate Insanity whether he recognizes this or not. He is at Hotel OJ, surrounded by the contestants, and he is still on MePhone4's island, like any other contestant. While Fan has convinced himself that he is more than just a fan of the show and that he is improving as a person, this development is still slow (obvious, coming from a person such as Fan who struggles with it) and he is still heavily attached to the core of his personality - the core which he was built to be in the first place. His love for the show is so clearly his own dedication and passion, and it truly does feel like his own CHOICE to love the show as much as he does. Even if he was created for it, it is a part of him that he loves and puts confidence into.
I swear these earlier points play into this bear with me,
So once Fan is told he was created by MePhone4, after the initial shock dies down, he would be in denial of it, of course, as Fan would react to any new information he had not considered about the show. Some "It can't be"s and some "There is absolutely no way"s being said by him, especially if he had not foreseen this coming. An instinctive reaction coming from Fan (which would also apply to Test Tube) is immediately questioning it, wanting answers- most definitely from MePhone4 himself. I don't think he'd believe Cobs if he told him, maybe not even Suitcase or Test Tube, he'd need to find the evidence for it and piece together if this even made sense at all.
Once he starts to consider it and all the pieces fit together for him as he looks back on everything, he'll let go of that denial. That's when it first really hits him. One of his first reactions is positive. He'd find validation in the fact he was created specifically for the show, he'd be honored and glad he was an actual piece of the show- not just a viewer or contestant, he was actually part of the show he loved so much. Fan puts a lot of his confidence into being the number 1 fan of inanimate insanity, as everyone knows, and being questioned on this or having people challenge him always strongly shows his insecurity over it. But knowing that he quite literally is, without a doubt, the biggest fan of inanimate insanity- and that he actually had this purpose and that he was made for what he loved to do- that would validate him immensely. He would thrive on his notion for a while until the existential crisis started to leap in.
He'd try to be acceptant of it, and this time around he would be in denial of his own emotions. He'd try to show how well he was taking this and to pride himself in being the biggest ii fan ever, so he puts up a confident front which is obviously not normal to anyone who sees him. He'd try his best not to think about the other implications of his existence being made for reality TV. He would try his best to appear in control and unburdened to prove to both others and himself that he was taking it well. I don't think this stage in his realization will go on for long. I think this would fluctuate a LOT depending on his mood.
At one point he does start to question himself. He overthinks his existence and his emotions, and if they are genuine- what if what he feels is fake? Just generated love? What if he truly doesn't like Inanimate Insanity? What's a real feeling from him and what's a fake one?! A million thoughts that some may not even make sense but this is where the existentialism really gets to him. Every time he felt excitement or love for the show, was that even his own emotions? Was that just made by MePhone4 so he could get some appreciation for his show- and maybe he'd get mad that MePhone4 kept dismissing him. Maybe he'd wonder why he was made if he's not being recognized and rewarded for how much dedication- if it was even his own- that he put into appreciating MePhone4, a dedication that was going unnoticed or deemed annoying by him.
Something I mentioned earlier, about Fan learning to embrace new opportunities for himself and about how he was still trapped in the show. He realizes he is forever tied to the show, and all his attempts at making changes for himself and being more than just a fan suddenly feel... meaningless to him. All he was ever made for from the start was to be a fanboy of the show, and he had tried to build himself around that. But those efforts were for nothing if this is all he ever was- just a fan. That was his entire identity, he was never anything other than that. This is all that could ever come out of him. So what was the point in trying? His shell might've been the only place he'd ever felt safe in anyways- and once he remembers it, his old coping mechanisms seem incredibly tempting. Fan would retreat back into his shell. Things just seemed so much simpler if he did, he wouldn't have to deal with all this overthinking if he just stuck to what he was made for, something he already had found so much comfort and significance in. He uses his shell to cope once again, regressing, turning back to his purpose. This would be how he copes with this new information, by embracing what it taught him that he was. He'd be in this state for a while, he'd probably try to pretend he never even learned anything and creating a false reality of his own security. Being a fan is still important to him, and something he feels so deeply about that he's urged into fully embracing it again. early season 2 fan is back babyyyy!
Not sure how long it would go on for, or even how long it would take for him to go through these stages, but this is somewhat of the process I believe he'd have! I think Suitcase and Fan should have a talk about dealing with all of this. possibly. I feel like it will boil down to "if it feels true to you, that's all that matters." for Fan dealing with this. I could definitely see Suitcase saying something similar to him.
As for him reacting to it after already having theorized this would happen or at the very least suspect it, I think it would go similar to that one drawing I made. He'd be proud at first, and it wouldn't sink in as fast because his pride comes first! But to have it actually confirmed to him would then send him into that same realization as stage 3 of processing it. Something something, it goes the same after this.
Anyways i love fannnn i could talk about him for hours boy i love you i wonder if we'll even get everyone's reactions to the reveal or if they'll even tell anyone else but if we do Fan would definitely have a prominent reaction to it <- guy who loves fan saying this. look at this bias
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2tarbell · 2 months ago
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can i just say that i love you?! you write trailerpark!rafe so well and i’ve waited so long to find a writer that created a work solely based on him! my obsession with trailerpark!rafe literally came from that short film drew did with rudy 😭😭
anyways i saw that you were looking for blurb ideas and honestly i can’t get trailerpark!rafe and reader doing cute domestic things together like going to the grocery store, washing the truck together, and maybe us seeing how rafe asked reader to move in with him and seeing his reaction to her adding her sweet touches to the place and making the trailer more homey for them.
thank u my love :C ur so sweet and i appreciate the message!!!! wrote something a little small just detailing rafe’s feelings about domestic stuff 💝 ENJOY!!!!
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TRAILERPARK!RAFE who loves how reader has become his life.
he had watched her grow up beside him, neither family abundantly rich. but her chalk drawings of butterflies and hearts stretched along the path of her family home — the colors and softness always enraptured rafe, as well as the furrow of her brow when she yelled at him for killing some little bug. then she turned from a little girl with dirt on her cheeks into a mature woman with curves and determination she definitely didn’t have before.
he was sixteen when he fell in with love her, with her soul.
so he asked her to move in with him on their six month anniversary, all bashful and unsure in the way only she could make him. he was nervous about asking her to just come over, yet alone move in with him in such a shitty little trailer; void of decoration and love. he had always wanted to be more for her, for them. this precious woman that wormed her way into his heart since the moment they met at twelve.
it was cute, the way he was avoiding looking as he drove. she could see his ears turning a bit red, his knuckles turning white on the steering wheel. he’d been on edge the entire evening — shifty eyes and shaky hands so unlike the man she had come to know and love so dearly.
it all made sense when he spoke lowly, eyes still on the road ahead:
“so, uh... whaddaya— ahem… was thinkin’ ‘bout you maybe — uh — movin’ in?”
“you— you want me to?”
rafe couldn’t imagine anything better. so he nodded. and so did she.
the drive continued with her head on his shoulder, both biting back cheesy smiles at the next step they’d decided to take. rafe brought her hand to lips, pressing a long kiss to her knuckles — his fears of being not enough were washed away as his place eventually became their place.
there she was that very weekend, all tender and sweet and telling him where to put her stuff amongst his. he sees her in the furniture they picked, the flowers on the kitchen table, the pictures of them on the walls, in the very foundation of the trailer.
(then of course they fucked on every surface available, ‘christening’ the space.)
her hands soothing and gentle on his arms when he comes home to her. rafe never was good at being gentle like she is — he thinks loveliness lives in her bones as she kisses his cheek and mumbles something about dinner that she made him.
but it was the first night after they moved in together, he saw her in the bathroom preparing for bed and felt all air leave him. he can’t imagine a life without her in it. doesn’t want to even entertain the idea. the thought of a place without her burns in his mind — searing and almost painful. he can’t believe there was a time when she wasn’t his.
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cool-island-songs · 2 months ago
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Analysis of ALNST Character Relationship Metrics
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My art book won't be here for a minute, but I ran some screenshots I saw on twt through an image translator and have a lot of thoughts:
TILL: Despite claiming to hate everyone in the world, Till ranks Ivan at 70% intimacy even as he identifies perturbing behaviors of Ivan's going back years and refers to him as "a bother". He also ranks Sua at 10% in spite of having little to say about her and finding it uncomfortable to be around her.
Though he postures at being misanthropic and has all the manners you'd expect of a boy who was half off at the human child pound, he's actually quite gentle and sensitive. This is reflected in one of the graduation messages he's left by a classmate as well:
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The person he feels closest to is an unattainable crush, and someone who doesn't feel that close with him in return, likely because he's too shy to really approach her or carry on a conversation.
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MIZI: That's Mizi, of course, who's rather childlike and naive initially. She likes everyone, but since Till chokes when he tries to speak to her and often keeps his distance, she wonders if he's avoiding her because he dislikes her.
Mizi gravitates towards people who she sees as "perfect", which is how she describes Ivan and Sua in her graduation message to Ivan:
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She doesn't see the darker side of Ivan's personality (which has been described on several occasions, even by himself, as "twisted") because he's attractive, successful, and helpful to her.
Though she likes everyone, Sua is her "God", and the only thing that can keep them apart is the tragedy of their situation, which forces Mizi to grow up in a brutally painful way.
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SUA: Sua is far less idealistic and naive than Mizi, and has clearly thought about sacrificing herself to save Mizi, since Ivan picks on her for thinking of doing so in an official comic. Accordingly, her feelings about Mizi are far more tinged by the knowledge that they will one day be torn apart by external circumstances. She laments that reciprocating her feelings will one day cause Mizi great pain.
She's always been more somber, and despite her surface similarities to Ivan (which he notes in a follow-up comic wherein he realizes he was wrong about Sua's feelings for Mizi being unrequited), she's quite different on the inside. Sua's more sensitive and thus her colder exterior serves to protect her, whereas Ivan's outward persona creates an illusion of normalcy that doesn't reflect his reality.
Sua views Ivan and Till as a threat and a nuisance, respectively. Like Till, she senses something strange about Ivan, and when it comes to Till, it's just one person too many around for her. This is fascinating to me, because I thought she might pity Till! Her feelings about Ivan were already pretty clear from this panel of the 'piggyback' comic, and she seems deeply hurt in the first comic linked by his prodding.
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IVAN: For his part, Ivan is fascinated by Till even though he's content to sit back and observe, pestering him to get a reaction or his attention for a brief time. He doesn't expect anything in return but wants more than anything to be on Till's mind (hence behaviors like stealing Till's belongings and returning them to him, pretending he had found them).
He prefers Sua to Mizi despite his awareness that Sua doesn't particularly like him, seeing her as a sister and even telling her she's "twisted" like he is. He likes Mizi well enough, especially her sincerity, but seems to find her optimism a bit much at times.
The fact that Mizi and the others would likely consider Ivan and Mizi quite close while Ivan does not reflects how much he postures even in his closest relationships. He struggles to connect with those he's most compelled by and it's not clear if he really wants to.
Some Ivantill thoughts before I go:
There seems to be a common sentiment that it's tragic Till was unable to see how much Ivan loved him, and I think we'll likely get more of Till's perspective on Ivan and their relationship in round 7. But it may not be the case that Ivan even wanted his true feelings to be seen, or would have known what to do if Till had reciprocated them.
There's something almost voyeuristic and self-negating in his feelings for Till (see: "I can’t reach you, so I imagine alone/You who shines, I stand next to you" from 'Black Sorrow'). He has far more self-awareness and willingness to accept things as they are than Till, who doesn't see that Mizi only has eyes for Sua and who would likely struggle to accept that reality.
Ivan, on the other hand, is well aware that his feelings for Till are "shallow", a bright fantasy to get him through his dark reality, and he seems to sincerely believe that his death won't scar Till because he's never really broken through to him. He's a schemer, and comments he makes in his graduation message to Till and the interview he gives in advance of round 6 suggest that he may have been planning to sacrifice himself for some time.
Part of me wonders if he hoped it would leave a mark on Till. Choking, kissing, and violently sacrificing oneself are all aggressive, forward acts, especially from someone who used to toy with people to get his kicks but was otherwise quite passive and unfeeling.
There are a lot of parallels in the one-sided loves, like Till acting out of his usual character for Mizi, and Ivan doing the same because of Till, putting all hopes of being saved in something just out of reach, staying in chains for that one special person. But Ivan's psychology is quite different from Till's, and in fact closest to Luka's re: low or no empathy. Both Ivan and Till are significantly traumatized by their upbringings but Ivan's difficult early life in the slums and his experience being dangled off that rooftop seem to have damaged his ability to connect to others or feel much of anything.
Till is the first person for whom he feels anything while for Till, Mizi is an early crush he puts on a pedestal in a much more commonplace way. I think the shared trauma of competing on that stage makes it much more difficult for either of them to imagine moving on, but Ivan is not wrong in identifying that he won't find that feeling again.
The thing that intrigues me most about this series is the way the contestants' differences play out, particularly with regard to how they view love and how they respond to their individual and shared challenges. I'd love to get into it further another time but this is quite long already so thanks for sticking with it if any have (haha)
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intoanotherworld23 · 6 months ago
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Slow and Steady Wins
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Summary: Joel loves to take his time and enjoy all of you until you’re begging for more
Warnings: mdni 18+ mature content, explicit sexual content
A/N: comments and reblogs are what help writers so please if you like it say something and reblog so others can enjoy! Also, my tag list is always open so please don’t hesitate to ask I would be more than happy to add more! Thanks! XOXO
Hall of Hunks
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“That’s it baby. Nice and slow.” Joel’s low voice whispers in your ear as you sink down on his length. Hands on his shoulders to keep yourself upright. Gasping as you feel your walls stretching around him. Adjusting to how thick he really is and enjoying the feeling.
Turning your gaze to the wall trying to avoid his intense stare across your face. Biting down on your arm to return your attention back to him. Chuckling at how shy you suddenly become with such an intimate moment. Leaning forward more to feel your chest against his so your hearts beat as one.
“Can you feel all of me?” Keeping his voice just above a whisper like he didn’t want anyone else to hear.
“Yes.” Mumbling while lifting your hips up just above the tip before pushing him back in. Hands on the fat of your ass squeezing the flesh softly in his palms.
“Does my baby want more?” Nodding your head worried nothing but moans and gasps would slip out. Your fists now tugging on the nape of his hair fingernails scratching along his neck sure to leave a mark. Joel didn’t mind in the least bit.
Stroking soothing circles on your skin as he raised his hips to get a deeper angle. He’s warm and soft and incredibly deep. Feeling his lips glide across your face as you flex your muscles to lift your legs. Both creating a rhythmic motion so you two were in sync.
“Take it easy sweetheart.” He directs you while he pats your ass in warning. Of course you’re so lost in the feeling of his cock and so drunk you can’t stop.
“I need you so bad Joel.” You plea with him pathetically that tears start to form in your eyes. He hated to see you in so much pain that you had to beg him. “Please it hurts.”
“I’m right here baby. I’m not going anywhere.” Reassuring you with a loving smile on his face showing off his dimples. Gripping your hips to drill his pelvis directly up into yours. His brows furrowing in concentration as he could feel you squeezing him so tightly. Like you were afraid he would leave and you would be empty.
“I- I need you.” Choking out as you looked into his dark brown eyes that were glazed over. It was like you were the only person in this world, and all you had was each other. Both of you living in this moment like it was the last.
“Fuck baby so desperate.” His voice dripping like honey so sweet and infectious it had you melting in the palm of his hand. One of his hands wedging between your sweaty bodies to connect with your puffy clit. Circling the sensitive nub hoping to get you closer to your orgasm.
Resting your head on his shoulder feeling the stretch of your thighs as it began to burn. Joel could see you struggling to keep up with his thrusting. Taking matters into his own hands as his arms clasped behind your back and he began to buck into you. Pressing his lips together and holding his breath to the point his face turned beet red.
“Oh my god just like that.” Encouraging him as he hit that sweet spot directly now causing your body to stiffen.
Flexing his abdomen as he ruts into you feeling him all the way in your stomach rigid and hard. With this comfortable position that he kept you in grateful that he was able to give you what you wanted. Joel felt like he was in control and he became drunk on the power.
“Fuck my cock it’s all yours.” Walls clamping down at his crude words snickering at your reaction. Joel looking at your unbelievably disheveled face even when you were a sweaty mess he still thought you looked beautiful. It was his favorite look on you. “Wanna feel that creamy cunt cum on my cock.
Crying out as you gripped onto Joel’s body like your life depended on it. Toes curling as your whole body shook and crumbled into a heaping mess. Chest rising and falling with each quick breath. Stomach trembling with the resounding orgasm that you had just experienced. It was intense and overpowering you felt like you might pass out. Your cunt sore from the beating that you just took stretching you out.
His touch so gentle and comforting as he helped ease you through your release. Soft kisses up and down your shoulders as he rubbed his fingers nimbly up and down your back. This was the Joel that you loved so delicate with you and enjoying every inch of you.
“Took my cock so well baby girl. Such a good fucking girl for me.” Praises whispered in your ear as he remained still inside of you neither of you wanting to move. Smiling lazily at him as you relax into his arms ready to stay like this for the rest of your life.
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sugurouge · 1 month ago
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— taste of the divine : getō suguru x f!reader
content warnings! DARK CONTENT, forced marriage, kidnapping, mind break, heavy manipulation, dubcon, breeding/pregnancy talk, misogynistic topics, torture (isolation & darkness), conditioning, pet names (love, little dove, good girl), depression, stockholm syndrome
summary: Set out on the honourable task of finding the right wife for their leader, Getō's followers have abducted a special sorceress to bear him children that will carry on his will and legacy. Unfortunately, unlike your rather promising lineage, your temper and beliefs are anything but befitting for his wife. But not to worry, there are many ways to reshape a person. You will learn. Of that, Getō is sure.
❝ la sensualité de ton regard, la fragilité de ton corps. je brise ta pureté. deux âmes s'emmelent pour l'éternité. ❞
wordcount: 3.5k | my kinktober masterlist
by clicking read more you are agreeing to consume dark content. don't interact if you cannot differentiate fiction from reality.
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Never have you felt as objectified as you do in this very moment: the lustful, piercing stares of Geto’s countless followers bore through your clothing as you are thrown before him—a man you know all too well from hushed whispers and dark stares within the Jujutsu Society. He is the enemy, a lost man.
The white robe they forced upon you, a mockery of a bridal attire, does you no favours. They made sure to leave nothing to Geto’s imagination: he should easily see how thoroughly they searched for a perfect fit when they took you.
And yet, somehow, he doesn’t even acknowledge your presence—not once does he seem to look at you, unlike everyone else in the room.
That is the first blow to your pride.
Then, there’s the way they speak about you as if you are not even there. Coming from a prestigious, ancient sorcerer family, your bloodline offers Geto everything he could possibly desire, all he could ever need from his perfect breeding vessel to bring forth some sort of prince to revolutionise the world. Indeed, they say, you are perfect.
“That monster will not lay a hand on me!” Your fighting spirit is adorable. But nothing could have prepared you for the sudden, heavy impact landing on your cheek. Geto can’t hide his chuckle at your shocked reaction. Did you truly expect to insult him in a room full of his most loyal men? They would never hesitate to put you in your place before continuing their praises of their great Geto-sama.
Strike number two followed so quickly, it made your mask crumble. The frustration becomes a thrilling decor on your face as you continue to hold your bruised cheek. There is so much hatred in your eyes—Geto looks forward to replacing it with fear. You will learn your new place, he is sure of that. You will love to obey him, to bear him children that will carry out his will and create a society of the promised.
Yet, Geto appears to hold not the slightest bit of interest for you, no desire found in those deep purple hues you nearly drown in.
He knows he needs to play this game wisely. He can’t have a woman at his side who despises him, can’t risk the danger of a mother who would rather kill her children than let the riders of his apocalypse trample the grounds of this world. You need to fall for him, have to desire him. For that, your strong-willed mind has to be broken, to turn you into the most ethereal sacrificial lamb the Jujutsu Society has ever known.
With a softly spoken command to "leave us," the room empties. His followers depart swiftly, their obedience causing you to frown. How can they submit to a demon like him?
A demon—that’s what he is to you. Dangerous, devious, twisted—yet alarmingly beautiful. As he approaches, the air seems to catch in your throat, and, of course, Geto notices the heavy swallow you're forced to take.
Is this the moment he’s going to claim you? Right here, in this dreadfully cold room, surrounded by an atmosphere of adoration for his sick schemes? Your body instinctively leans back, shrinking away beneath his stare. You already appear so submissive. He doesn’t trust it.
Standing tall with feet planted firmly on the ground, Geto looms above your kneeling figure. You didn’t expect the shiver that crawls over your skin as your eyes meet his. It’s as though he has flipped a coin and donned a different personality: one of intimidation and something darker, something sick. He might kill you on the spot if you speak now.
Hence why your lips part, yet no words escape before you shut them once more. The nervousness clouds your mind, paralysing your thoughts as you waver between holding his gaze or looking away. You're already caught in his web.
"Learn to love your new home," he says—the only words he speaks before leaving you alone.
The man you expected to force himself upon you, to bruise you, to scar your body and mind—he never touches you. He never seeks you out, never again meets your gaze. Your first night welcomed you to a life of isolation. You can only cling to the sticky feeling of fear that attaches itself to your new daily existence around Geto’s presence.
𓍯𓂃
Every day, you are expected to be part of his reception, dressed in fine clothing, your hair styled in ways befitting your title. Yet, despite this, you are forced to kneel, your forehead touching the ground, just like all his followers. You have reluctantly accepted this role after spending your first weeks locked away in a tiny room, with barely any light or kindness to sustain you. 
During those weeks, you never once met your 'husband'. He refused to be bothered by your disobedience, unconcerned with the punishment his most trusted men inflicted upon you. 
It all played perfectly into his hands, as you began to believe these men to be far worse monsters than Geto could ever be. After all, he never laid a hand on you, never tortured you, never dragged you into the dark dungeons until you began seeing things. 
After months of this twisted game of escape within his temple, with only his henchmen for company, he finally deemed you broken in. No one had ever lasted this long under his torture before. He might have even said he was impressed by your willpower. But that strong-willed part of you was gone the moment Geto finally decided to free you from the darkness. 
He may never forget the state he found you in: the hatred in your eyes shifting to relief upon seeing his face, your body worn down and weak from exhaustion, your fighting spirit crushed by the horrors your mind encountered in that cell.
You wanted to be saved by him. 
Deprived of human contact, kindness, touch, affection, you crave to be cradled in his arms. You want nothing more than to feel a hand pat your back, to be held tightly while you finally allow yourself to cry until you pass out. But the torture continued. Geto assumed it wouldn’t take much more to get you to eat out of his hand. So, for now, he shall continue this farce. He shall refuse to touch you since you aren’t fully ready to accept his love just yet. 
That much was clear since he could still catch you stealing glances towards the nearest escape route, no matter which room you were in. Until eventually, even with the doors unlocked, you no longer dared to look. You were too aware of what they would do to you if they caught you again. You couldn’t bear to be plunged back into the darkness, where the monsters you carried out of that room still haunted your sleep. 
So, you learned to listen, to bend in an attempt not to break, while your mind slowly began to fade. Geto loves this version of you. How you bow to him each time he passes, how your body stiffens at the mere sound of his footsteps, how your eyes search for him. What are you looking for? Have your resources finally run dry? Do you need him now? Need him to fill you with his love, his affection, and his seed? Geto can only admit to himself the joy he feels upon comparing this new you to the feisty thing you once were. It makes his desire almost unbearable, his cock heavy with the urge to pump into you until you give out, until you bless him with the perfect children. 
You should really stop clinging to your dignity and surrender yourself to him. 
Instead, you isolate yourself further. You behave, yes. You don’t act out, you don’t try to escape. You are now a perfect rule follower, much like a robot, little like a wife. But what else could he do but leave you space. He swore to contain himself. He’s not some monster that would hurt another great jujutsu sorcerer. Plus, he adores you too much.
But he does start to worry. Worry for the plans that will fail if you succumb to your depression and fail to cling to him for support, for purpose.
𓍯𓂃
Imagine the surprise Suguru tries to hide upon learning about the person standing in front of his most private chambers, seeking an audience at such a late hour. A defiant shadow of the woman you once were enters his haven—your hair loose and unstyled, a soft and tired expression gracing your beautiful features, and that delicate robe you chose to wear for him. Your guard is finally gone.
After another slumber filled with dark monsters and fears, you find yourself desperately searching for comfort and found yourself in front of these doors.
Suguru moves closer, tearing through the final walls you've erected around yourself. He didn’t expect you to break down merely from his acknowledgement of your presence. Was he too hard on you? He wonders, as gentle hues of purple try to solve the riddle in front of his eyes. The kind words of “You are so beautiful,” make your shoulders sag, they add a tremble to your bottom lip—a reaction Suguru hadn’t anticipated. His sudden gentleness feeds your depraved ego. Careful not to turn into a glutton. 
The smell of incense and sandalwood might just become your new favourite. The creamy sweetness blended with earthy undertones seems to be a comfort you didn’t expect once Suguru stands in front of you. The warmth of his palm, another trait you wouldn’t have granted him—you always expected him to be cold to the touch. Yet, as a hand lightly rests against your neck, you feel yourself melt.
To Suguru’s astonishment, you lean into his touch and let your eyes fall shut. This serene moment allows your mind to finally slow down thanks to the much needed human contact. For some reason, you feel safe, protected. 
You are so docile now.
Your eyes meet as Suguru tilts your chin upwards, leaning in until his forehead rests against yours, his fingertips tracing the contours of your neck and collarbones. “You’re empty,” he breaks the silence with a gentle voice. “Let me change that…” The tip of his nose nudges yours, soft lips graze your skin before trailing kisses along your jawline. “I can make you forget about your past struggle and give you a new purpose…” Your hand fists the fabric of his attire as an attempt to ground yourself, his affections have you hum in sugary content. “A purpose greater than you ever anticipated.” Suguru’s free arm finds rest around your waist, to stabilise your tired form against his chest while his mouth attaches to your neck, leaving kisses in its wake. 
“Give yourself to me, be mine forever,” his husky voice reaches your core, hits exactly where he wants to influence your body most as he whispers the words into your ear. Then he pulls back, to cradle your cheek while commanding you. “Look into my eyes, little dove.” He tilts his head, challenging you to focus on him, to finally speak, surrender. 
He needs to taint you, to finally shatter the perfect image you’ve been trying to uphold. “Let me save you.”
You can barely offer more than your pliant body, seemingly overwhelmed by his greed for you. “Save me, please,” the whispered words threaten to burn themselves into Suguru’s memory.
His fingers run over your shoulder, down to your chest and above your stomach. You feel hot beneath his touch, needy to be filled with life and love again.
The alluring touch reaches beneath your robe, between your soft thighs, allowing him to tease you through the fabric of your panties. The tip of his finger grazes the delicate area, soft moans escaping your lips as your hips push into his touch.
The moment lures you forward, to close the distance and have your shaky lips meet his in a searing first kiss. Who would have thought you were that starved? Naughty girl. But he happily leans into your guidance, kissing you without restraint, teeth tugging at your lower lip before his tongue pushes into your mouth, leaving you breathless and needy.
As you break away, your face finds refuge in the curve of his neck, sighing your pleas for “more…” against his warm skin. “Patience, love,” Suguru breathes, eliciting goosebumps to decorate your skin and a flood of pleas to cloud your mind. One of his fingers hooks under the silky fabric, tugging at it teasingly to let the cool air hit your pulsing heat before a single fingertip begins to tease your clit, then enters your clenching little hole.
Your moan is unholy, a sound so exquisite Suguru couldn't prepare himself for it. He won’t let you hide them. A finger redirects your face to force you to look at him and allow him to drown in your glazed eyes. The irregular huffs from your lungs warm his skin, as he loses himself in your irises. You’d kiss him again if not for the firm grip on your chin.
“I’ll make you feel good every night, as often as you need me,” the once-dangerous man promises, before showing you his mercy. His hands release you to finally tug at the overflowing fabric of your robe, exposing your heavenly form to his eyes. And yet, you don’t feel exposed, don’t feel shame anymore as you watch Suguru admire you. You’ve never felt so good.
“Undress me,” Suguru’s firm voice commands, though he seems so pliant, so soft. Let your rush of confidence guide you to close the distance again, let your fingers untie his robes and slip beneath the heavy layers. His eyes close upon your touch, almost as if he’s allowing you control. Leaning in, his temple rests against yours and strands of dark hair drape over your shoulder area while the fingertips that trace along your waistline already feel like home.
As you push the fabrics off his shoulders, you can’t help but explore Suguru’s built figure. The contrast between his skin and the richness of his hair, illuminated by the moonlight, makes him look almost innocent. You swear you feel him shiver as your fingertips thread through his hair, his shaky exhale dampening your skin. “So pretty,” you murmur subconsciously, upon which his eyes open, a newfound desire now pools in them. 
You don’t mind the blunt nails that dig into the plush of your ass, don’t mind being pushed back until your calves bump against his bed frame. Yet, he keeps drawing in, to fully push your figure up against him while cupping your face to kiss you again. Suguru’s hardness meets your stomach, tainting your skin with his pre-cum while seeking such teasing pressure. The thought of being inside you any moment now has turned him needy. He kisses you more erratically, lips crashing against yours until they nearly turn numb.
He guides your body to find comfortable rest on his mattress as he leans above you. There is a moment of pure adoration as your hands cradle his cheeks gently, before curious fingertips explore the flexing of muscles beneath the required force to hold himself up. His hand roams over your heaving chest, appreciating the form of your tits before trailing along your waistline and hip to take a firm hold of your inner thigh—parting your legs with ease to prod the head of his cock against your achingly ready hole.
Your eyes shoot up to him as he guides his length to run along your puffy lips, coating himself in your arousal and relishing the way your hips push against him. It’s too tempting not to push into you, especially when you roll yourself against the head of his cock, stretching your entrance around him ever so slightly and forcing a moan from Suguru’s lips. Your hands rest in the long strands of his hair and at the soft skin of his nape. Every fibre of your being lures him forward, pleading for him to make you feel complete.
He succumbs, leaning down to swallow your moans as he whispers, “Forgive me for my sins,” just a second before he sheathes himself deep inside you. You never expected to experience pleasure this intense upon your surrender; the stretch of Suguru’s cock a wicked reward that steals the last drops of sanity from your mind. Your lustful moans echo in the shared space between your bodies, and the chilly temperatures of the season make your panted breaths seem feasible.
“Finally,” you think you hear his breathless murmurs before he leans in again, lips latching onto your perky nipple while Suguru palms your right breast, gently squeezing your soft mound and rolling the nipple between his fingers. His teeth spoil—or rather, overstimulate—your left side, nibbling on the sensitive area until you whine and writhe beneath him, your hips pressing against his cock perfectly. How could he resist putting a little torture on you?
“You feel so good,” his words drip like honey into your ear. The tips of his hair and the trained muscles of his upper body brush against your figure, tickling and teasing your awareness as he sinks deeper to finally bottom out.
The addictive moan that escapes you leaves him no choice but to refuse to kiss you further; he doesn’t want you to cover up the sounds of pleasure he’s bringing forth. Instead, he redirects his mouth to nibble along your exposed skin, planting one love bite after another along your neck until he reaches your collarbone.
His world stops spinning when you moan his name—so shamelessly, so heavenly—that he could ascend right in this moment. “S-Suguru!” you plea, so smoothly, he can’t help but thrust harder into you. Your fingers drag over the duvet while he pulls his heavy cock out of your fluttering walls only to push back in. You cry in pleasure, praises to his name spilling from your lips as his hips roll against you. His hands securely grip your shaking form, holding you perfectly in place for his own selfish desires.
Your soft moans mix with his rich ones, creating the most beautiful harmony as your bodies share the deepest connection possible. Warm palms glide over your figure to take a firm hold of the back of your thighs and press them flush into your chest. His entire weight squishes you further into the mattress and allows for a reach that appears incomprehensible. The sudden intensity seems too much to bear; it makes you painfully aware of just how deep he is inside you. His thighs slap against your hips at a rapid pace, each thrust jolting your body against the mattress as his cock repeatedly hits your cervix.
By surprise, you hear him suck in a sharp breath as he witnesses the state he’s left you in: fat tears staining your cheeks as the mix of pain and pleasure leaves you unable to form coherent thoughts. You’re so perfect, perfectly submissive and ruined for him to rebuild.
Now, you feel his love, the adoration pooling in his dark eyes as he can’t seem to look away. Eager to witness every second of your pleasure. “So perfect, such a good girl for me,” he praises, his lips caressing your forehead to calm you down, while he continues thrusting into you with the same strength, speed, and desire. “Let go for me, give into pleasure,” he encourages, the clamping of your walls a telltale of what impedes. 
You barely manage to nod in agreement, moans and hiccups making it impossible to form coherent thoughts while Suguru knocks the air from your lungs. You whimper against his sweaty skin, your breath tickling his neck while your nails claw into his back. “‘S too much,” is your final warning before your walls tighten perfectly around him, and the coil in your stomach finally snaps.
With all this newfound love, he can’t resist breaking his little rule. Suguru seeks out your lips, hurriedly placing his own over yours—surely not to drown yours, most likely to cover his own—as he almost immediately follows your orgasm with his own. He thrusts all the way in, coming deep inside your fluttering walls, which practically milk him dry.
His hand slides from your thigh to gently press against your stomach, accentuating where exactly his length resides and his cum lands, praying that your womb savours every drop of his seed to hopefully turn fruitful.
Your bodies are close enough for your heartbeats to thump against each other’s skin, pants and whimpers stifled by the shared kiss as you both come down from your highs. “Don’t ever dare to leave me.” The words are nothing but a whisper as his lips return to spoil your body with kisses, but the intensity behind them makes your heart stumble. The loneliness he must have repressed since his days at Jujutsu Tech have ended something you never once considered before.
But now you are here. Here to stay with him, to be his family, his weakness and strength all at once and forever. He broke you just to hold you. Now let him make it up, forever.
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dividers by @/cafekitsune
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charlotte-zophie · 11 months ago
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Therapy conversation
Dear Fandom, dear Mr. Gaiman,
I hope this isn´t weird but i have something to confess.
Since I watched the second season of Good Omens, I've gone through so many phases that I barely recognize myself anymore.
My first reaction after episode 6 was shock, then I was disturbed because I didn't know that it was possible for a series to have such a strong influence on my psyche, I questioned myself and doubted my sanity. Then I was overcome by an incredible sadness and was really heartbroken. I felt like a pubescent teenager, in my mid-30s. I couldn't sleep properly for several days, had nightmares and my thoughts were with these two ineffable loving idiots the whole time.
And the worst thing about it was that for the first few days I was really ashamed to admit to myself and my husband that I was completely and hopelessly immersed in this world. I did nothing but watch videos, listen to sad songs, and read heartbreaking fanfictions for days. And of course I read the book again and watched the series over and over again. All in the hope that it will ease my heartache a little.
But as is often the case in these situations, after a few days in which no real change occurs, you have the thought that you will be lost in this feeling forever. But since I have 3 children that I need to look after, of course locking myself away for weeks with heartbreak wasn't an option, so I had to find an outlet for myself to channel my pain.
So I started painting a picture. By Aziraphale and Crowley. And stroke by stroke I let my feelings flow out of me and into the picture.
It took over a week until I had a motif in which I could see my thoughts and feelings expressed and then it took another week until I finished the picture. On an old canvas with paints that haven't been used for a long time, with many, many layers of old paint underneath.
But when the picture was finally finished, it really took a load off my mind. It was like I had broken a dam and was finally able to let it all out and convert it into creative energy.
But I think the most important thing was that I uploaded the picture to Tumblr and received such a response that I was incredibly touched and immediately motivated to paint more pictures.
Since that day, hardly a moment goes by when I am not holding a pen in my hand or not thinking about a new picture. I'm in one of the most creative phases in a very long time and I'm really enjoying it.
I am so grateful for the wonderful people here! Here I see that I'm not alone with my strange feelings that I still don't really know how to classify. Here I read thoughts that are so similar to mine, here I see works of art that melt my heart, here I feel understood!
And I am so grateful for the pain that showed me the way back to my creative energy!
Thank you Fandom!
Thank you Neil Gaiman!
I would have been lost without you!
Because I don't know my way around here very well, I didn't think about pinning the picture in question as a link when I created this post, but since many people have asked about it, I've pinned it here. Thank you all, love love love
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grugruel · 10 months ago
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Saint, or Sinner.
Parings: Arthur Morgan x f!reader
MDNI/NSFW
Masterlist
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Summary: You've had feelings for Arthur for quite some time now, but little did you know. That he has them for you, too.
After a rowdy night in Valentine, the group flees lawmen and end up in Strawberrys hotel. Whatever will occur?
Word count: 8.9 k
Warnings: Micha being Micah, bar fight/violence, plot with smut, mutual pining, soft Arthur, pinv sex, passionate sex, oral sex (f recieving), praise, pet names (girl, sweetheart), choking, fingering, handjob, creampie, mentioned masturbation.
AN: The words ran away from me, holy shit. It's so much longer than I intended.
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Muffled voices argued in the night, soon growing into angry shouts. Rousing me from my sleep, confused, I put my gown on in a hurry. Sleep ridden eyes in a dark tent were not doing me any favors. I pulled the flap to the side and stumbled out of the tent, the voices creating one hell of a commotion.
Just as I did, most of the camp had awoken and joined in on the argument, gladly contributing their own heated opinions on the matter. All except Duch and Arthur, much to my dismay.
My eyes adjusted to the scene before me, the assailants quickly becoming clear. Standing around the campfire, was Micah of course, the center of attention as usual. Stood half shouting at John, who's pot seemed to be boiling over.
Soon after, John unleashed a rant on Micahs stupitidy, throwing in every word he could manage in his steaming anger.
I rolled my eyes, what could that damned fool possibly have done now?
'You piss ridden, moldy rat bastard.' John shouts, seamingly leaving Micah lost for words.
Bill bursts out laughing, slapping his knee at the insult, 'You big fuckin nuthead Micah. . .' He sighs, catching his breath.
Even Hosea snickers, 'Hes right, and that's coming from Bill of all folk.'
I cover my mouth as a giggle leaves my lips, seeing Micah so dumbfounded really sobered my mood. The rest of the girls have a simular reaction.
Micahs eyes narrow on me, 'What are ya' laughing at sweetheart. I ought to teach ya' a lesson.' He snarls, greasy hair hanging over his face.
The camp falls silent, none too appreciative of his choice of words. My mood turn sour again and a chill runs up my spine. The first to call him out was Sadie, 'Someone hold me back.' She spits, Sean stepping in to fo judt that.
Second was Miss Grimshaw, 'The money and now you threathen the girl, have you gone and lost your mind Micah Bell?' disgust evident on her face.
The money? What money?
John took a threatening step toward him, very displeased with Micahs comment, hands forming into fists at his sides. Hosea too, gave him a a bemused look.
'Try anything Bell, and I'll cut your fucking balls off.' I spit, glaring at him, feeling incredible joy in the way his face falls.
Muffled chuckles surround me, 'Thats my Girl.' Sadie laughs, along with a low, approving whistle from Javier.
'Whats goin' on here?' A gruff voice cuts in, looking between me and Micah.
Arthur, flanked by Dutch.
Arthur, shirtless. Flanked by Dutch.
In all my anger, my eyes cant help but sneak a hasty glance at his broad chest. Then quickly averting it, afraid he'd notice. I clear my throat, trying to keep my thoughts in check, 'He threatened me.'
That was enough for Arthur, not doubting me for a second. Fixed himself straight up with murder in his eyes, then walked at the man, readying his fists for a beating.
Butterflies fluttered within me.
Unsurprisingly, Micah cowered. Taking quick cautionary steps backward before Dutch could jump in, throwing his arm in front of Arthur and stopping him in his tracks. John looks at the two men, directing an accusing finger on Micah, 'Not only that, this blasted idiot took our money.'
The moment of joy from Micahs humiliation disappear, turning into anger once again. The camp giving him a mutual glower.
Arthur runs a hand through his hair, 'I ought to kill you.' He speaks, gritting his teeth, and takes another firm step forward. Pushing the limits of Dutch's patience, who strengthens the hold on Arthur.
'Surely, there must be a reasonable explanation for this?' Dutchs says, forcing a smile and shooting Micah an expectant look. Giving him an undeserved chance at explaining himself. Although he didn't show it, he too, was bemused.
'Well- I wanted to invest it, make it grow. I just wanted to help the camp.' Micah preached, his voice sleazy and confident. Telling the sure as shit, bull of an excuse as if he was the one to feel sorry for. Despite the circumstances.
Sighing, 'He god damned gamled it all away.' John reveals, looking ready to kill the man himself. The camp erupts into a loud argument once again, everyone getting a piece in.
I sneak a glance at Arthur, his chest rising and falling in big breaths, trying his hardest to stay calm. 'Bastard.' He mutters under his breath, Dutch giving him a quick warning glance.
'Shut!–' a hoarse voice calls out, '–Up!' Dutch yells, and obediently, we all fall silent. 'Theres no use, standin' around screamin'. You fools are attracting unwanted attention.' Dutch says, hands on his hips, 'Who won the funds.'
'Some rich bastard up in Strawberry.' Micahs sly voice cut through the night.
Dutch rubs his forehead in thought, 'Then he can do without it, go back there and grab it.' An exasperated sigh leaving him, 'Arthur, John, Bill, Charles.' He rounds the men up, 'You go there with him.' He turns to go back to his tent, but pauses and shouts, 'And no!–' dragging the words out, '–Deaths!' He looks at Micah, knowing damn well he'd otherwise murder the mans entire family in cold blood, then points to Arthur, 'That means you too, Arthur.' He says, a tired tone to his words. Clearly insinuating that he wanted Micah alive.
Everyone scatters, going back to bed on edge. But I linger, tucked away behind the tentflap. I watch Arthur come back out of his tent, in full get up. Silently praying that'd they'd be alright, that he would be. I did not care what happened to Micah, I hoped the man would get shot right between the eyes. I would personally love to see to it, I hoped Arthurs hatred for the man would get the better of him. Dutch always went way to easy on Micah, I didn't understand it, but something wasn't quite right with it.
Abigail kisses John goodbye, it made me happy to see them back together and all made up. I watch Arthur leave his tent in full get up, then stride past my tent. He gets on his horse with the rest of them, and ride past the treeline of Horseshoe overlook. No doubt berating Micah all the way to Strawberry.
I laid down in my bed, trying my damndest to sleep. But worry was keeping me up, eating away at me. Something didn't feel right.
He'd heard his words to her, him threatening her. Horrifying images cloud his mind, filling him with rage all over again. No doubt things he'd done before. He glanced a glare at the man, ugly mut.
Had Dutch not been there to stop him, Micah would've found his face beaten bloody and Arthur grinning on top of him. Had he not been loyal to the camp, to his people, to Dutch. Micah wouldn't be returning from this trip. He would conveniently get a bullet to his head, or found on the bottom of a valley, beaten unrecognizable before the fall had caused the killing blow.
He didnt want any harm coming to her. He'd never felt this for a woman, not ever. He'd steal glances, admire her when she wasn't looking. Damn well kill for her. She was the light he had needed for so long, her charming smile could shine brighter than any star he'd ever seen.
'You taken a likin' to her, Morgan?'
John raised his head at that, paying closer attention to the conversation, to Arthur. Knowing the possibility of him flying off the handle.
'Shut up if you know what's good for you Micah.' Charles scolded.
He scoffed, 'The day I listen to–' Micha looks Charles up and down, lingering on the color of his skin, 'The likes of you,' he continues, 'Will be my last.' Muttering the last words.
Ignoring him, Charles didn't do as much as raise an eyebrow. Micah did not deserve a reaction.
Micah was black rot, down to his core. Destorying everything he touched. We all knew it, but all aren't so keen to admit it. Dutch was the first person to come to mind, I couldn't understand for the life of me why he was so defensive of the man.
'I can see why.' Micah spoke again, 'Pretty little thing, isn't she?' He looked at Arthur, 'Got a big mouth on her too.'
John looked between the two men, noting the way Arthur fisted his reins, no doubt knuckles turning white under his gloves. Along with the way he kept his head straight ahead, focused on not killing the man, 'Micah, keep her off your tongue.' John warned, 'I don't care for you, but I don't want the heat from Dutch when you're found dead.' His raspy voice referring to him and Arthur.
Charles looked at the men in silent agreement, he preferred staying out of camp conflicts. But she was a woman dear to the camp, touching her would bode ill for any man.
And ad usual, the big idiot doesn't listen, 'Wouldn't mind takin' her for a ride one of these nights.' He said, the self-righteous smile he bore evident even in his tone. There was no need to look at him to know it.
Bill had been staying out of it, but he could feel the anger radiating off of Arthur. Enough to switch sides, hanging back, then stearing his horse up next to Arthur instead of Micah. Just in case a bullet would come flying.
And wouldn't you know it, Arthur reached into his holster and pulled his finest revolver, aiming it at the sorry excuse of a man. All in one quick motion, he'd been labeled as a dangerous for a reason. John sighed, now he'd done it.
Micah, dropped his reins. Raising his hands in the air, keeping a smug expression on his face. But beneath, he was scared witless.
'Strawberry up ahead.' Charles called, not caring much for the action behind him. Killing Micah would only do the camp good, but a gunshot would give their location away.
'Not another word of her.' Arthur began, 'Touch 'er–' He warns, 'And I'll let her kill ya'.' His voice gravelly and threatening, but Micah scoffed at the notion.
The familiar click off a safety lever sounds out, and the color drains from Micahs face.
'House is just up ahead.' Charles cut in, 'I'd suggest you wait wait with this til we got the funds.'
With a final glare, he holsters his gun and rides up to Charles. Clearing a hill, the house comes into view. Arthur sighs, 'Damn it Micah, you didnt tell us this feller had security.'
'You scared of a little fightin' pretty boy?' Micah mocked.
With a scoff from Arthur, they hitch their horses and pull up their bandanas, setting about proving the rumors of the infamouse Van Der Linde gang.
I anxiously checked my father's old pocket watch. It had been a few hours now. I put it down, tried to think of other things, and then picked it up again. Another 5 minutes had passed. Christ. I couldn't bear losing Arthur, John or Charles, god forbid all three of them. Bill could be sweet, but only when he needed something. I couldn't even dare imagine John leaving Abigail and Jack behind. What would they do? Stay with the gang, of course, but. . . Goodness, what about Arthur? My thoughts were racing ahead of me.
A few more minutes pass, then I hear hoofbeats, relief flods through me. It's hard to count, but theres at least three horses. God, let it be the right three. I emerge from my tent, along with Miss Grimshaw, Abigail, the rest of the girls, and Dutch. I race up to Abigail, holding eachothers hands as we watch the treeline in silence. Relying on each other for support.
Eventually, they break through. All five horses returning with their men on top of them, secretly I curse. One of the could've gotten lost and the world would've been a better place for it. I stroke Abigails back while John sees to his horse, then walks up to us, taking her in his arms and spinning her in a circle. They laugh, and a tinge of jealousy spark inside me. Yet I'm more than happy for them.
I observe the rest of them, they seem to be unharmed. All except. . . Arthur, his white shirt covered in blood. The terror must've been evident on my face, because–
'Hes fine.' John spoke, 'Most of it aint even his.' He said in an effort to calm me.
I nodded, smiling faintly 'Thank you John.' And sqeezed his arm.
'Well–' Dutch called out, 'How'd it go?' He looked at them, expecting nothing but grandeur.
'We got more than we bargained for. . ' John said, grinning. But there was something else his tone.
Bill unloaded his horse and came carrying several saddlebags, throwing them at our feet, money spilling out 'We got what we came for—' He paused, then pulled out two more bags from vehind his back, 'And more!' He burst out in a self-satisfied laugh.
I had to say, they made the best out of a bad situation. And on top of it all, Micah had barely made a sound, he was strangely quiet.
Dutch patted Bill and John on the back, 'Good work, wake the rest. Let us celebrate!' He clapped his hands together, no doubt imagining Tahiti.
I searched for him in the crowd of people as the camp was waking up, and found him talking to Charles and Sadie at the edge of the camp, clutching his side. Worry gnawed at me. They joined us by the campfire while Arthur headed into his tent, not saying much of nothing to anyone else.
The festivities carried out throughout the night, Arthurs lamp remained turned on. Eventually, I just had to check up on him.
I snuck away from the folk, Abigail and John had already turned in, as had Dutch and Molly. Seemed like the singles were the only ones left drinking, and Micah had disappeared to sulk somewhere. Lucky us.
I left them to it and approached his tent, 'Arthur?' I called, but didn't get an answer. I just heard some huffing from the inside.
I risked his reaction and pulled the flap to the side, 'Arth-' I began, but got cut off by the sight. In front of me was Arthur Morgan, shirt pushed up over his stumache, cowboy hat on, stitching up his own wound. Sitting on a stool, his pants were unbuttoned and folded down by the hip, revealing that beautiful "V" shape along with a happy trail of hair leading down toward, well. . . A new cut stretched from his hip to his abdomen, blood covered his hands and side, groaning as he pulled a needle through his skin. Something set off inside me, a yearning that made my body ache. He scarcely even noticed me, not until I gasped.
He looked up, eyes widening, 'You need somethin' Girl?' He blurted out, taken off guard. His state of undress did not help.
'Arthur Morgan. . .' I sighed, slightly offended, 'You shouldve fetched me, you know im good at stitchin' wounds.'
'I know, I know. 'm sorry sweetheart.' smiling faintly, 'Didnt wanna bother you.' He drawled.
I also noticed a mostly empty bottle of whiskey next to him, hoping he used most of it to disinfect the wound. I put my hands on my hips, 'Will you let me help?'
He nodded and handed me the needle, fingers brushing against eachother as I grabbed it.
Our eyes met, briefly. Sharing a glance that was ment to be stolen.
He leaned back against his dresser, the muscle of his upper body changing and rippling with his movements.
I cleared my throat and stepped closer, 'May I?' I asked, pointing at his shirt.
'You may.' He smirked.
I leaned closer to him, unbuttoning from top to bottom. Then pushing the shirt over his shoulder so it'd stay clear from his wound. I kneeled in front of him, his legs spread so I could get closer to the cut, then resting my elbows on his strong thigh to steady my arms.
I tried to focus on the wound, but it proved hard as I was so close to his crotch and how closely he was observing me.
'Might I ask what happened?' I bit my lip in focus, threading the needle through his skin.
'More men than expected.' He answered with a grunt, looking at my lips. Blood rushing somewhere it ought not to, 'One jumped out on me.' He continued, his voice husky and strained.
'He live to tell the tale?' I asked, searching his gaze. Hoping he'd be sincere.
'He did. . .' He groaned, as I finished another stitch. Making the aching settle in my core, a pulse running through me. Every now and then, when I believed him not to be looking. My eyes roamed his chest, studying his strong pecks and biceps.
'You know anything about Micahs sudden tongue-tie?' I ask, locking eyes with him. He lowers his head with a chuckle, a smirk poking out from under his hat.
'I might've. . . Given him something to think about.' He shrugs, the corner of his lip tugging.
Sighing, a smile spreads over my lips 'Youre a good man, Arthur Morgan.' I told him earnestly, 'Better than most.' I finished the last stitch and looked at him, 'All d-' I began, but he cut me off.
His lips greeting mine in a passionate kiss, lasting a whole second. But it was the best second I'd had in years. He pulled back, a horrified look on his face. Immidietly regretting it.
Surprised, I did not quite know what to say. 'Arthur, Im- You- You're drunk. .' I blurted, thinking it was the alcohol taking action. Nothing else.
'I'm–' He looked at me, searching for words 'You're right, I- I probably am. Apologies miss.' He managed.
I cursed myself, why'd he have to be drunk? He'd never remember that this even happened tomorrow.
'No- no. That's fine, don't worry. I didnt-' I tried, I didn't mind it. In fact I loved it, is that so hard to say? 'I should, uhm- let you sleep, you need to rest.' Idiot.
'I s'pouse so.' Was all he said, shock and regret still lingering between us.
'Well, good night. . . Mr Morgan.' I said, and he winced. Quickly, I took my leave.
'Night ma'am.' He called after me.
It felt like fleeing the scene of a crime. Bashing myself for the the formal good night, we were way past such pleasantires. It felt like a blow to even utter the words, even though I usually call him Mr Morgan. But it's always in a teasing way. Never formal and distant like this was.
Goodness gracious, what had I done?
I tucked myself under the covers in my own tent, thoughts circling my mind. I could not tear myself away from the smell of him, his musk, his broad build. Or the way sweetheart sounded as it rolled of his tongue, the way his tongue felt against my own. A hand snaked between my thighs, relieving myself of the ache he'd caused. Then slowly, I drifted off to sleep. With nothing but him on my mind.
You god damned fool Arthur, why'd you have scare her away? Old bastard, he thought to himself. Seeing her by his tent had startled him, but her gentle touch and sweet voice was all the comfort he'd needed. It took the sting right out of the needle. He'd used the bottle to clean the wound, but letting her think he was drunk was easier than the truth.
He'd took a liking to her from the moment he laid eyes on her, but she would never feel the same way. She'd called him Mr Morgan, as if the last year of building a relation with her had disintigrated within a second. It stung, real bad. Worse than a knife ever would. Yet that kiss made it all worth it her soft lips against his, her sweet taste. Feeling her breath on his skin as she undid his buttons, and seein' you like that? Kneeling between his legs, so close to him. It was a memory he would cherish through thick and thin, a memory that would keep him up at night. A memory that made him hard in an instant, he let out a frustrated groan. Silenty taking care of it, pretty images of her occupying his mind as he did. Finally, he began drifting off to sleep. And he only had one thing on his mind. She'd called him a good man, that's all that mattered to him.
A week passed, and we'd had a few shallow interactions. Nothing serious, but resembling the akwardness we experienced in his tent, it made my heart sore. I always found a reason to talk to him, to be near him. So when to opportunity arrived once again, I jumped on it. We'd had a full day of chores, but needed to head into Valentine for a supply run, to stock up on things like ammo and vegetables. And just generally take a look around town, see what else we could find. But I don't have a horse of my own, and since Lenny and Sean were taking the wagon.
I found myself in need of a ride.
The sun had begun its final stretch before setting, meaning the light was golden and beautiful. The warm spring air was gradually turning chilly, but in the most soothing way. I joined the crew by the horses, 'Who's willin' to give a lady a ride.' I asked coyly.
Arthurs mouth fell open, as if he was about to speak, but quickly closed it again. 'I always got space for you, girl.' Sadie winked.
'Stop that. . You ol' charmer.' I smile shyly. Arthur couldn't help but smile, nothing but admiration I'm his eyes for you.
'Well-' Micah began, and I immediately rolled my eyes. Arthur glaring daggers at him.
'Shut it, and shave that overgrown squirell off your face.' Sadie interrupted him, Sean erupting into laughter at the comment.
'Why are we even bringin' him? We don't need that kind of trouble today.' I pointed out.
'Cause I say so, sweetheart.' He leers, smugness radiating off of him.
My stumache churns, my dinner almost catching its second wind, 'Dont call me that.' I turn serious.
Micah laughs, about to respond-
'You heard her.' Arthur stops him, making him reconsider opening his mouth again. Instead he opts to mutter under his breath, no doubt the most vile and cruel things too.
John joins us to help get the wagon in order, then sen dus off. Changing the subject back, 'Arthur got the most space.' John points out, 'I'm sure he wouldn't mind.' He winks at me subtly, and I blush. John Marston, you godsend.
'That okay with you Arthur?' I ask, looking up at him with big eyes.
'Course, c'mon sweetheart.' He jumps out of the saddle, grabs me by the waist, and helps me onto his tall, dark shire.
I yelp, unprepared for his strength. He gets back on, placing himself behind me, then grabs the reins on either side of me, capturing me in his big frame. I can honestly say, that I've never felt safer. A content smile covers my lips.
Sadie chuckles at the two of us, the chuckle turning into pure laughter when she sees Micahs expression. Gritted teeth and narrowed eyes, glaring at us, probably furious by my blatant approval of Arthurs use of sweetheart.
And with that, we begin our journey into town. Lenny and Sean were singing behind us, Sadie leading the way ahead of us. And Micah? I didn't bother finding out where he was.
Feeling Arthurs warmth behind me was all I cared about, his chest and thighs rubbing up against me with every step of his horse. It was doing something to me.
As the sun dove deeper, the cool in the air grew. Involuntary shivers took ahold of my body, 'You cold, girl?' He asked.
I shook my head, 'No, I'll be fine. Thank you though, Arthur.' My voice hackig as a particularly violent shiver shook my body, making my teeth clattered against eachother.
'Dont you lie to me, you're freezin'.' He says, worry lacing his tone, 'Take the reins.' That was an order.
I did and his hands slid between us, unbuttoning his jacket. Knuckles brushing against my back, all the way along my spine, ending at the arch of my back. Sending shivers in waves all over my body. 'Scooch down.' He orders again. Slightly hesitant, I slide backward. My ass tucked neatly again his crotch and my back flush again his chest. With his jacket still on, he wraps it around my sides, nearly covering my entire upper body. Sharing eachothers heat, trapping it between us.
'Arthur. .' I breathe, lust coursing through me. But it must've sounded as a protest because-
'-Dont start.' He said, 'My jacket is big enough for the both of us. Now hand me the reins, darlin.'
Oh you wonderful, oblivious man.
I gave them back to him and tugged his jacket closer around me, leaning impossibly closer to him. Gradually, my shivers disappeared, all thanks to the large, warm bear of a man behind me.
'See? Told ya'.' His body shook gently with a silent chuckle.
'You're somethin' else Mr Morgan.' I sighed and this time, the words felt right.
He smiled, she didnt see it, thankfully. Everything she did, made him smile. She was so close to him, and he had indirectly caressed her back. He could've leaned back and given her space, but he craved her. It was intimate and special. He'd not felt so peaceful since she stitched him up last week. Everything he did was at her service. Now she sat between his legs, grinding up against him. Not to her knowledge though, she just moved her hips to the step of the horse, riding like a woman should. But unbeknownst to her, she was feeding a hunger he fought hard to contain. Head in the lions mouth and all.
'Whats on that mind of yours Arthur?' She asked, 'I can feel you thinkin' from 'ere.' Shuddering against him, is she still cold?
If she only knew, what was goin' through his mind. How he thought of you every waking moment, a sentiment she would never return.
'Nothin' special, you still feelin' cold? I can feel you shiverin' Girl.'
She froze for a second before she spoke, chuckling under her breath, 'No I ain't cold, but thank you again.' He could hear the smile on her lips.
What was it then?
'Is the cut heelin' good?' She asked, concern and something else lingering in her voice. The memory resurfaced in his mind, his blood setting about rushing places. He shut his eyes, trying to clean his mind before he answered. Clearing his throat first, 'Good, 'is gonna be a nice 'n clean scar.' His voice lightly strained.
'Well, I'm glad. You got enough of em' for my liking.' She huffed, annoyed at the notion of him always hurting himself.
He risked it, and leaned his head forward, almost touching her shoulder but not quite. Breathing in that sweet scent of hers. Telling himself that it wasn't such a strange thing to do. 'I'll survive, I always do. With your fine stitchin' It's impossibly not to.'
She blushed, turning her face away from his, a bit shy at his compliment. He loved the way her cheeks turned rosy, 'Thank you.' She said proudly, another shudder against him.
Damn it, wad she still cold or not?
He opted out of asking again. She'd just tell him no. So he took matters into his own hands, quite literally. He moved the reins into one hand and circled the other around her waist, pulling her closer. Figuring he could blame it on rough terrain, that he didn't want her to hurt her pretty self.
But she didn't protest, on the contrary. She made a sound, almost like she exhaled a moan under her breath. Then grabbed his thigh, rough terrain too, perhaps? 'Arthur. . .' She breathed.
'I apologise miss, I shouldn't ha–' He began.
'No, no. You should've.' Firm in her words. 'You, remember much from last week?' She asked.
'I do.' He breathed, a nervous shake to his voice.
'You werent drunk?'
'No ma'am.' He answered truthfully, 'I lied.'
'Why?' There was hurt in her voice, and something broke inside of him.
He hesitated, choosing his words carefully, afraid he'd hurt her more, 'Thought maybe it'd be best, since I stepped over a line.'
She scoffed, 'You didn't step over anything, Mr Morgan.'
'Well I. . .' He paused, 'You didnt seem to like it, thats all. Didnt want you to think I was takin' advantages.' He rambled an explanation.
'I didn't want to take advantage of you Mr Morgan.' She sounded annoyed, annoyed by this whole missunderstanding, 'Didnt want you kissin' me drunk, if it was, just cause you were drunk.' She explained, 'I thought you were drunk. . .' sighing.
Puzzle pieces were finally falling into place for the both of them.
'We're here!' Sadie called from the front.
Dissapointed, I sighed. Yet, relieved, I smiled.
Arthur jumped off, grabbed my waist and helped me down. His touch lingering as our eyes met, searching eachothers gazes for answers. Wondering, where to go from here. We were finally on the same page, and knowing he kissed me from his own free will put a sping in my step.
The group broke up, I headed with Sadie as the men got about their business. We looked at the guns first and foremost, then headed for the general store. I looked for Arthur as we walked from building to building, and saw him heading into the stables. I wondered if he was gonna treat himself to a new saddle. He deserved it.
We went about our list of things to buy, then gathered by the wagon. Collectively, we decided on a bar run before we rode back to camp. Lenny and Sean were particularly excited about the idea.
We ordered whiskey, drank and laughed. Sadie and Lenny stood between me and Arthur, resulting in a whole lot of meaningful glances. Just wishing we could talk some more.
At some point a woman had approached Arthur, laying her hand on his bicep, clearly flirting. And my blood ran cold.
I stood talking with Sean, who noticed my change in demeanour and looked over at them. 'Dont worry yourself girl.' He laughed, and I furrowed my brows. Not sure what he ment.
'You gonna buy a lady a drink?' The woman asked, her voice sultry. Now, my blood boiled.
Arthur chuckeled, 'I didnt know I was talking to a lady.' And glanced at her hand, which she immediately retracted upon noticing.
She scoffed, 'Aint that a nice way to treat a woman. You taken cowboy?' She asked, her eyes narrowing on him.
'Well. . .' He huffed, 'You could say that.'
My heart swelled at his comment.
'Told ye so.' Sean smirked, and I playfully hit him on the shoulder.
The night went on, and as most nights go in a saloon, a fight was bound to happen. Arthur must've been watching me, because within the next half minute. A man had walked up next to me, and was about to touch what wasnt his to touch. But Arthur appeared out of nowhere, his outlaw instics mustve been on high alert. The man did in fact look sleezy enough to attempt such a thing, Arthur grabbed the mans wrist in a bone breaking grib. 'You keep your hands to yourself mister.' He said, his voice low and threatening.
'Or what?' The man spit, and Arthur let go of him. Lowering his head, chuckling. That shouldve been the mans warning, but he didn't know Arthur like we did.
Backing me up, Sean whispered 'Get ready.' to Sadie, Lenny and me. Nodding to a table of thugs in the corner, they were staring at our group intently, watching the scene unfold.
Arthur jerked his head to the side and smirked under his hat, then in flash he gave the man a lethal right hook. Sending him flying backward. The thugs sprung up, heading for us with firm steps.
Holy shit. A full on brawl broke out, everyone lunged themselves on everyone. I delivered a right hook of my own as two guys were ganging up on Lenny. Another man tried getting handsy with me, he snuck up behind me and grabbed me around the waist. So I elbowed him hard in the side and threw my head back. Headbutting him, I turned around and pushed him off me. Taking great joy in the way his nose was gushing blood, I grabbed him by the shoulders and kneed him in the crotch. With a whine, the man fell to the ground.
Even Micah joined in on the action, he'd been sitting still enjoying his whiskey beside us. Until he decided he wanted some fun too, apparently only he could be inappropriate with me. He smashed the glass over the head on the closest man, although im pretty sure he wasn't even apart of the brawl.
As the dust was settling and the lawmen had been called, we flew the coup. Arthur grabbed my hand and rushed us to our horses, not willing to risk leading the law back to camp, we rode hard and fast for Strawberry. Arthur was making a fuss about me on the ride there, asking if I was ok, and I assured him I was. 'Well. . . You got one hell of a hook girl.' He said, and I beamed with pride.
The gang had to act casual as we arrived to Strawberry, which proved futile with cuts and bruises as we asked for hotel rooms. But we ended up conning our way into possession of the last three hotel rooms. Bribing the clerk that is.
Arthur grabbed a key of his own, which nobody disputed. He gave me a meaningful look at and headed upstairs. Sadie grabbed a key and dragged me along with her. Leaving the last three men to argue about sharing a room, 'Shut up Micah, you're sleeping in the hall.' Sean shouted behind us. Turning around, I saw Micah slamming the doors open and storming out.
'I'll find a woman to warm me, dont ya' worry.' He shouted back, muttering under his breath.
We burst out laughing and ran to our room, but before we headed in, I grabbed her arm 'I'm just gonna go check on Arthur real quick.' I said, not thinking much of it.
'I'll not see you til the morning then.' She laughed, our stolen glances had apparently not been so stolen after all.
I rolled my eyes, 'We'll see.' And knocked on his door.
Lenny and Sean walked by, a low whistle accompanied by chuckles as they saw me standing there. But they quickly turned quiet when Arthur opened the door, standing in only his shirt and pants 'May I come in?' I asked, giving him my best puppy eyes.
'Course.' He smirked, and opened the door wider, stepping out of my way. My side brushing against him as I entered. His vest and jacket lay discarded on the bed, along with his hat.
'About before-' I began, my back turned to him. Suddenly feeling his hands slide onto my waist, pulling me into him. I gasped, not expecting it. He leaned into my shoulder, lips gracing my neck, all the way up to my ear. The warmth of his breath fanning over my skin, making me boil on the inside. It made it difficult to think.
'I want you darlin', all of ya'.' He whisperes, 'If you'll have me–' pausing to place a gentle kiss between my ear and jaw, '–'M tired off missunderstandin's.'
In a haze, I turn around and lay my hands on his chest, having to crane my neck upward to meet his eyes. I reach one hand to caress his cheek, brushing at his stubble 'So am I.'
He leans into my delicate touch, nuzzling my hand and placing a soft peck on my palm.
One of his hands sinks its fingertips into the flesh at my hip as the other grabs my arm softly, sliding his hand up to my wrist, gently holding it as he places another kiss there, right on my pulse point. His lips linger, feeling my rapid heartbeat. Gently, he experiments. Sucking and pecking the spot.
A deep ache settles in my bones, fortifying with every kiss he places, deepening with every beat of my heart. And for a second, he feels it too. Meeting my eyes with a smirk, he pulls my sleeve up to cover more ground. Immidietly I feel that my clothes are weighing me down, 'Arthur.' I whisper.
'Hmm?' He hums, focused on kissing what skin he has access to.
Clearing my throat, 'Will you–' I breathe, 'Help me unbutton?'
His eyes meet mine again, searching my gaze for certainty. 'I'll spend the rest of my days doin' your biddin' if it makes you happy girl.'
'It would–' I say, and his hands move to my ribcage, pulling me into his frame. His face an inch from mine as his hands snake around my back, making quick work of each button without batting an eye. 'Oh—' I gasp, surprised by his practiced fingers. 'Should I be jealous?' I ask under my breath.
'No ma'am, none could compete with you.' He assures me.
I feel a blush creep up my cheeks, and in the same moment, he finishes with the last button. Stroking his knuckles over the bare skin along my spine, and sighs. Content. As a shuddering breath leaves me.
Arthur wonders for but a second if shes cold again, until he realises.
'You werent cold, were ya'?'
Immedietly getting what hes reffering to, 'In the begginin' I was.' I tell him truthfully, 'Youre wonderfully clueless sometimes, especially for such a experienced man.'
He chuckles, 'You tellin' me you were all hot 'n bothered for me?'
'You were rubbin' against me, pullin' me close. How could I not be?'
'I wasnt–' He protests, '–You were on me if anythin'.'
'Oh so youre tellin' me you were all hot 'n bothered then?' I throw his words back at him, smirking happily while doing it.
Arthurs mouth opens and closes, unable to think of a comeback.
'Thats what I thought.'
He scoffs a smile, pushing my blouse off of me, leaving me in my undergarments.
His hands move to my arms, sliding upwards, leaving prickled skin in their abscence. He trails them over my collarbones and neck, his eyes following every inch of movement.
I lay my hands on his hips, holding onto him as my knees grow weeker by the second.
Forming his hands into loose fists, he caresses my cheeks with the backs if his fingers. Gently brushing the knuckles over my cheekbones, pushing strands of hair from my face in the same motion. He flattens his hands and cup my face, big hands draping around the sides of my head. Pulling me closer, he leans into my space. Meeting in the middle, his lips ghost over mine.
My breath hitches when he kisses me softly, his thumbs stroking my temples in soothing motions.
I grab onto his shirt, fisting and lightly pulling on the fabric. Arousal taking the reins completley, making it hard to think. I look at him with hazy eyes, admiration clouding every sense I have. '. . 'S your turn mister.' I breathe.
Smiling, he continues kissing me, 'At your pleasure ma'am.'
With a pleased hum, I trace my hands up his abdomen and over his chest, and Arthur groans in response. The aching pulse in my body stiffens at the sound, becoming more compressed. More focused in my core. Kissing him, I easily unbutton his shirt, making quick work of it, and slide it over his shoulders. Now hooked on his arm folds, it hangs around the small of his back. I sigh happily, what a sight it was.
'You expercied taking men's shirt's off?' He jokes, laughing. Then moves his hands to my waist, clawing softly at my skin.
I slide my arms around his neck, up into his hair. Scrathing his scalp tenderly, 'Well–' I begin, but he bites my lip suddenly, warning me. I yelp, accidently pulling on his hair, and a whine escapes him. My core dripping at the sound as I release a shuddering breath, '. .'M a woman Arthur, I have needs.'
'Yeah?' He questions, 'You needin' right now, woman?' The gruffness in his voice making my fingers curl.
'I am. .' Whining, my kisses turn needy, 'I need you Arthur, always.' I moan.
At that he wraps his arms around me, pulling me tightly into his embrace, his fingers digging into my flesh. He kissed me, hard. Hard like he might just die if let's me go.
'Skirt. . .' mumbling against me, 'Needs to go.' He manages. Without another word, I snake my hands behind my back, untying my skirt a let it fall to the floor. Arthur walks forward, forcing me back until my chins hit the bed and we fall onto it. He puts his weight on me, although supported by his forearms. 'Pants.' He orders, but I was already one step ahead. My hands already moving quickly to undo the buttons on his pants as hes kissing his way down my jaw and neck. Focusing on my sweet spot, hes sucks bruises, turning me into a moaning mess under every breath. Meanwhile, I shove my hand into his boxers. He grunts and shoves his forehead into the crook of my neck as I palm him, overwhelmed by my long lusted for touches. His member was already harder than a rock, and leaking juices. I bring my thump to his tip, stroking his seed in circles. He groans breathely into my neck, his warm breath causing further heat to pool in core. He leans onto one arm, sliding the other along the curves of my body. Cupping my breast through my brasier, 'I want to look at you sweetheart.' He groans and unfolds his arm so that hes above me to meet my eyes, 'Can I look at ya'?' He asks, voice pleading.
I nod, '. . 'Course.'.
Waisting no time, he snakes one hand under my back and lifts me up. I gasp, always surprised by his strength. 'Please, ma'am.' He begs, and I take the hint. My hand leaves his his member and move around my back, undoing the brasier. Throwing it on the floor, he sighs in relief, 'Wanted to see ya' for so long.' He breathes, lowering me back onto the bed and himself onto of me. Immidietly taking one breast into his mouth, and palms the other. Squeezing them, playing with my nipples, using teeth, tounge and fingers. Automatically, my back arches. Pushing my abdomen against his, and accidentally making my mound rub against his crotch. He hums under his breath, his hand leaving my breast and slowly slides down my body, then pulls his mouth off of my breast with a pop. 'Now.' He whispers, kissing his way up to my jaw, then leveling his head with mine, 'Wanna se all of ya'.' his free hand cups my cunt. I gasp from the sudden touch, there's no friction, no movement, yet the aching grows stronger from the warmth of his palm alone. I shut my eyes, trying to come up with an answer. But the presence of him takes up my entire mind, all I can manage is a nod.
Not satisfied, he pushes his palm firmly against my core. 'Look at me girl.' He orders, sliding his middle finger over my slit, undergarments creating a barrier. Making my wetness soak into them, and he chuckles when he feels it. Whimpering, I open my eyes to look at him, and he smirks, 'Good girl.' And plants a kiss on my jaw, 'Use your words this time.' He pecks my lips, then slides his finger over my clit. Lately circling it through the fabric, I swallow hard. Jolts of pleasure surge through my body as something finally gives. 'Want. . . You.' I manage.
'Yeah?' He breathes, and I nod. To which he raises his brows, and pushes two fingers against my core in warning.
Another jolt, '!Mmm, meanin'. . .' Humming a stutter, 'Yes–' I pause, '–Please Arthur. I- I want you.'
'Atta girl.' He praises, then begins trailing kisses down my chest, over my nipple and abdomen, ending at my mound, right above my clit.
My back arches, 'Please. .' I whisper, pleading with him. He pushes back, shakes his already half off shirt completley off, and his pants follow. My eyes go wide at the size of him, hello cowboy.
His hands slide up my thighs, giving reassuring squeezes until he gets ahold of my undergarments. Hooking his fingers under them, he gently slides them off, and the both of us gasp. 'Beautiful.' He murmurs, admiring me. Then bends down, kissing his way up my inner thigh. Winding his arms under my legs and grabbing my waist, then hovers over my cunt, giving me one last look before diving in.
He licks one long stripe up my folds, gathering my wetness on his tongue. Then attaches himself to my clit, generously sucking and circling his tongue around it. I'd been on edge since the night in the tent, hyper sensitive from always wanting him, and finally feeling him on me? It's purely magical, I have to bite my cheek to keep from screaming when he shoves two fingers inside me. Thrusting in and out, curling with every withdrawal. I was already close, 'Arthur, 'm so close.' I moan.
He nods, furthering the movement of his tongue, 'Tell me what ya' needin' girl.' He mumbles against my folds, the vibrations of his voice deepness have me gripping my sheets, clawing it them like a wild animal.
'Need you, need you in me.' I blurt out.
He laughs, 'Im already in you sweetheart.' Causing my back to arch again, oh sweet, sweet vibrations. I throw my head back into the pillow, and his hand slides from my hip to my lower abdomen, 'Be good and lay still now.' Then pushing down with his palm. That combined with his fingers, were– were enough. . .
Blinding pleasure surges through me as I come on his fingers, walls clenching, fluids flowing. I breathe heavily as he laps it up, 'In me Arthur, please.' I whine.
'Youre gonna have to be clearer girl.'
I loose my patience, 'Christ, Arthur! I need you cock in me.'
He smirks, 'Well why didnt you just say so?' His hands push my legs over his shoulders and he climbs on top of me, face to face, he kisses me passionately. Tasting of salt.
His tip graces my entrance, 'You sure, aint you?' He asks, kissing my jaw.
I bury my hand in his hair, 'Mmh, 'm sure.' And with that, pushes inside me. A breathy moan leaves our mouths simultaneously.
'Feelin' just as sweet as you taste sweetheart.' He whispers against my jaw, nuzzling his nose into my cheek and forehead against temple. The pulls out, to the tip, and shoves himself back in. Hard and passionate, he sets perfect pace. Rocking our bodies with every thrust, going deeper than I ever thought to be possible.
'Christ.' I groan, he's hitting that spot inside me with every motion. One hand moves though his back, scratching at it loosely, pulling on hip to get him even deeper. He grunts, in my ear. Might aswell be music, wouldnt be able to tell a difference. He snakes one hand up my torso, grabbing my throat gently and squeezing just enough. Brushing his thumb over my my jugular. Outlaw indeed.
I pull on his hair, to level his face with mine, I wanted his lips, his tongue. 'Kiss me cowboy.' I order, and he follows.
Kissing me deeply, in rhythm with his thrusts, In rhythm with the aching that was finally dulling in my body. Finally, I had I'm. Truly had him. Bliss flows through me as the knot in my stumache tightens, on the verge of my second orgasm. And telling by Arthurs thrusts, he wasn't far away either. In a few more thrusts we both topple over with a breathy moans, Arthur whispering, 'Good girl.' Over and over as his seed was filling me to the brim, seeping out around his member as he collapses on me. My legs falling to the bed. We gather our breaths in a comfortable silence, just enjoying the closeness of the other.
He lays and arm around me, pulling me close as we fall asleep. Both thinking of the other, just not having to imagine what holding the other would feel like anymore.
At some point during the night, Arthur had rolled me off of his arm and snuck out. I was to tired to think much of it, especially since he returned shortly after. By morning I had all but forgotten it, brushing it off as a dream.
As we got dressed and ready the next day, I handed Arthur his hat. He took it, but looked at me, 'Put it on, wanna see you in something of mine.' He says, smiling.
'Gladly.' I chirp, and put it on.
His smile slants, turning into a smirk, 'Now, girl. You know what that means don't you?'
'Why'd you think I was glad to put it on. If not just to tell Micah to shove it.' I chuckle.
'It suits ya' He ruffles my hair with the hat.
We walked out and fetch our horses, the grup giving us mixed looks as the spot us. Arthurs hat declaring to the public of his intentions, that I was his and that we would have a busy night. Sadie smirked knowingly, winking at me. While Sean and Lenny looked happy for us, Micah was the only one who glowered.
'I got a surprise.' He says as he saddles his shire.
'Yeah, whats that?' I tilt my head.
He nods to Sean who runs off, I quirk my eyebrow at Arthur, 'Whats all this?' I ask.
'You'll see, keep your eyes peeled sweetheart.'
Eventually, Sean comes back into view, leading a horse I don't recognize. A beautiful mustang, tan coat, and white forhead. I don't connect the dots at first, 'Sean got a new horse?' I ask, confused.
'Now why would I surprise you with a new horse for Sean?' He asks, chuckling. And the pieces snap into place.
'For me?' I ask, dumbfounded. A million questions circling my head.
'Got her yesterday, had Sean ride and get her earlier this morning. Since I was. . . Occupied.' He smirks.
'That's why you snuck out in the night, then?'
He hums, 'Mhm.'
'Well I'll be. . Arthur Morgan, thank you.' I smile, hugging him. He wraps his arm around me, holding me tightly, afraid I'd otherwise slip away.
'. .'S nothing.' He pecks my cheek, 'Go meet her.'
As we arrived back to camp, we got busy. Late into the night we spent in Arthurs tent, defining the meaning of cowgirl.
The next few hours we rode next to eachother on our way back to camp, flirting and laughing as Saint and I got used to eachother.
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starsjulia · 2 months ago
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luxury and lace // leah williamson
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leah williamson x spoilt reader
a/n : i know quite a bit of this is inaccurate, but i am currently skint and dreaming of a luxury shopping spree
warnings : suggestive, and that’s really all!!
It wasn’t uncommon for her to surprise you with spontaneous shopping trips, but this particular Saturday was different. Leah had sensed you’d had a tough week and decided that today would be all about pampering you. So, she insisted on taking you to Bond Street, one of the most upscale shopping destinations in London.
The day began with Leah picking you up early, a playful grin on her face as she drove the two of you into the city. You knew that look—it meant you were in for a day of indulgence, whether you liked it or not. But of course, you did like it. You loved how attentive Leah was, how much she enjoyed making you feel special.
As soon as you arrived, Leah wasted no time. The first stop was Gucci. The store was quiet, its plush interiors and soft lighting creating an atmosphere of luxury. Leah immediately began browsing through the racks, her eyes sharp as she sought out pieces she knew would look perfect on you.
“This one,” she said, pulling out a sleek black dress with a plunging neckline, the fabric shimmering subtly under the store lights. “You’re tryin’ this on, love.”
You took the dress from her, smirking. “Are you sure you can handle it if I wear something this daring?”
Leah’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “Handle it? Babe, the real question is, can you handle the way I’ll be lookin’ at you all night?”
Heat rushed to your cheeks at her words, and without another word, you headed to the changing room. The dress fit like a dream, clinging to your body in all the right places. When you stepped out to show Leah, her reaction was immediate—her gaze darkened, and her lips parted slightly as she took you in.
“Proper stunnin’,” she murmured, stepping closer to adjust the straps on your shoulders, her fingers brushing your skin in a way that sent shivers down your spine. “This is non-negotiable. We’re buyin’ it.”
“Leah, it’s so expensive,” you protested weakly, knowing full well that Leah wouldn’t back down once she made up her mind.
“Price don’t matter when it comes to you,” she replied smoothly, her eyes meeting yours in the mirror with an intensity that made your heart skip a beat.
Before you could argue further, Leah had already signaled to the sales associate, handing over her card with a practiced ease that made you smile. As you changed back into your clothes, you couldn’t help but feel a warm glow of affection for her. Leah was always like this—determined to make you feel like the most important person in the world.
Next, you made your way to Louis Vuitton. The store was a haven of luxury, with its iconic monogram prints displayed proudly on every shelf. Leah’s eyes were already scanning the collection of bags as you walked in.
“How about this one?” she asked, holding up a chic crossbody.
You bit your lip, admiring the bag. “It’s beautiful, but do I really need another one?”
Leah’s lips curled into a knowing smile. “Need? Maybe not. But deserve? Babe, you deserve the world.”
You laughed, shaking your head at her logic, but there was no denying how perfect the bag was. Leah could read you like a book, and she knew exactly what would make your heart flutter. She insisted on purchasing the bag, adding it to the growing collection of items she was spoiling you with that day.
From Louis Vuitton, you wandered into Cartier. Leah’s eyes immediately gravitated toward a delicate bracelet in gold, adorned with small diamonds that caught the light beautifully.
“This would look gorgeous on you,” she said, already envisioning it on your wrist.
You raised an eyebrow, giving her a teasing smile. “Leah, are you trying to claim me with jewelry now?”
Leah chuckled, wrapping her arms around your waist from behind and pulling you close. “Maybe I am. Should get my name engraved in it. Gotta make sure everyone knows you’re mine, yeah?”
You turned your head slightly to meet her gaze, feeling the warmth of her breath on your neck. “Not bad at all.”
The bracelet was yours before you could even protest, Leah slipping it onto your wrist herself, her fingers grazing your skin in a way that made you tingle all over. She kissed the inside of your wrist after fastening the clasp, a gesture so sweet and intimate it made your heart swell with love.
The next stop was Chanel, where Leah couldn’t resist picking out a pair of back heals.
“These are a must,” she declared. “They’ll go perfectly with that dress we just bought.”
You tried on the heals, feeling a rush of confidence as they elevated your outfit—and your height—by several inches. Leah’s approval was immediate, her gaze sweeping over you with a mix of admiration and desire.
“You really have it all planned out, don’t you?” you teased as you walked around in the pumps, testing their comfort.
Leah grinned, her eyes following your every movement. “When it comes to you, always, babe. Gotta make sure my girl’s the best-dressed wherever she goes.”
From Chanel, the two of you made your way to Sephora. Leah knew how much you loved trying out new makeup and skincare products, so she insisted you pick out anything you wanted. You spent a good hour browsing through the aisles, swatching lipsticks, testing perfumes, and sampling the latest skincare lines.
“Do you think this color suits me?” you asked, holding up a shade of lipstick.
Leah nodded, moving closer to inspect it on you. “It’s perfect. But you should get a few others too, just in case you wanna switch it up.”
You chuckled, knowing that Leah wouldn’t let you leave without at least a few bags of makeup and skincare products. She insisted on getting you a new fragrance she thought you’d love and a high-end eyeshadow palette that had caught your eye.
With several Sephora bags in hand, Leah led you to Victoria’s Secret. As soon as you walked in, Leah’s eyes lit up with that familiar glint of mischief, and you knew you were in for some fun.
The store was filled with soft, sensual lighting and racks of lingerie in every shade and style imaginable. Leah wasted no time, immediately gravitating towards a section filled with delicate lace sets. Her fingers trailed over the fabrics, picking out pieces she knew you’d love—or, rather, pieces she knew she’d love seeing you in.
“Here we go,” she said, pulling out a deep red set with intricate lace detailing that left little to the imagination. “This one’s got your name written all over it.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at her enthusiasm. “Are you sure you’re picking this out for me and not for yourself?”
Leah’s grin was nothing short of wicked. “Bit of both, maybe. But mostly for me, yeah?”
Your cheeks warmed at the way she looked at you, her eyes dark with intent. She handed you the set and gently nudged you towards the fitting rooms.
“Go on, try it on. I wanna see how it looks.”
You raised an eyebrow, a teasing smile tugging at your lips. “You know, I might need some help getting into this one.”
Leah didn’t miss a beat. “Is that an invitation?”
“Maybe,” you replied coyly, biting your lip as you led the way to the fitting rooms, Leah following close behind.
Once inside, the door barely closed behind you before Leah’s hands were on your hips, turning you to face her. She looked down at you with that same mischievous glint in her eyes, her fingers already toying with the hem of your shirt.
“Alright then, let’s see what we’ve got here,” she murmured, her voice low and teasing.
You giggled, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks as Leah helped you out of your clothes, her touch slow and deliberate. She was taking her time, savoring every moment, and you could feel the intensity of her gaze as she watched your every reaction.
Finally, you were standing there in nothing but the lacy red set Leah had picked out, and the way she looked at you made you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. Leah stepped back for a moment, taking in the sight before her, and you could see the raw desire in her eyes.
“Turn around,” she instructed, her voice huskier than before.
You did as she asked, feeling Leah’s eyes on you as you slowly spun around. When you faced her again, she had already closed the distance between you, her hands reaching out to gently touch the lace along your hips.
“Jesus, you’re somethin’ else,” she murmured, her breath hot against your skin as she leaned in closer. “I’m never letting you take this off.”
Your heart raced at the intensity in her voice, and you couldn’t resist teasing her. “You’ll have to, eventually.”
Leah smirked, her hands sliding up your sides, her touch setting your skin on fire. “We’ll see about that.”
She leaned in, her lips brushing against your ear as she whispered, “I’m buying this, and a few more. I’ve got plans for you, babe.”
You shivered at her words, feeling a thrill rush through you. “You’re spoiling me, you know that?”
Leah chuckled, pulling back just enough to look into your eyes. “And I’ll keep spoilin’ you every chance I get.”
With a final kiss to your shoulder, she reluctantly stepped back, letting you change out of the lingerie. You could see the reluctance in her eyes as you put your clothes back on, but there was also a promise there—a promise that tonight, when you were back home, she’d pick up right where she left off.
When you emerged from the fitting room, Leah was waiting with a satisfied grin, her hands already full of a few more sets she’d picked out while you were changing. She handed them to the sales associate without even glancing at the price tags, her focus entirely on you.
As you left the store, Leah’s arm draped casually around your shoulders, she leaned in to whisper in your ear. “Can’t wait to see you in all that… and then out of it.”
You laughed, playfully shoving her away. “You’re impossible, you know that?”
She grinned, unfazed. “Only when it comes to you, babe.”
The two of you continued your shopping spree, visiting a few more designer stores where Leah picked out everything from a stunning evening gown to a pair of sunglasses that she claimed made you look like a movie star. By the time you were done, you could barely carry all the bags, but Leah was right there beside you, more than happy to shoulder the load.
As you walked down the street together, the sun beginning to set behind the London skyline, you couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude and love for the woman beside you. Leah might be tough and commanding on the pitch, but when it came to you, she was the most loving, generous partner you could ever ask for.
And as the two of you made your way back to the car, Leah’s arm never leaving your shoulders, you knew that no matter where life took you, Leah would always be there, ready to spoil you with not just gifts, but with her endless devotion and love.
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uriwoos2 · 4 months ago
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bnd with a bookworm s/o . . .· ୨𐍸୧
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ꕤ overview: boynextdoor dating a bookworm! genre: fluff. warnings: none. word count: 3.1k requested: yes! ♡ note: this is one of my favorite things I've ever worked on, so I sincerely wish it turned out well >< wrote it with the help of my dearest @blumisiu and her wonderful ideas <3 so I'm dedicating this to vivi and everyone who considers themselves a bookworm! this is for u, hope you enjoy hehe^^ likes & reblogs are very appreciated! — with love, cream <3 . . . @onedoornet
⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂❀
sungho
𐚁๋࣭⊹ he's the type to read himself actually! but not so often that he'd consider it a hobby. he finds it to be a relaxing way to enjoy his leisure time. so when he finds out that you like reading too, he'd be absolutely thrilled!! (∩˃o˂∩)♡ beyond happy that you guys have something in common. might start reading a lot more, just so he can have stuff to talk to you about :( will probably recommend you books he has read and liked especially, wanting to know your opinions on some of his favorite books! ⊹₊˚
𐚁๋࣭⊹ you would spend lots of quiet evenings reading together <3 when you both have nothing else to do, or if you happen to have some free time, you'll both be situated on either the bed or the couch, all comfy, heads tucked into your respective books, in the shared space overcome by pleasant silence that envelopes you both. (ˆ꜆ . ̫ . ). ̫ . ꜀ˆ) ♡ the soft sound of the pages being flipped the only thing disrupting the quiet. the soft glow of the sun setting shining through the window, providing warmth.
𐚁๋࣭⊹ in such moments you and sungho would mostly settle for gentle, barely-there touches, where one of you would put your hand over the other's, letting it rest there, or tracing faint shapes on each other's thighs, and when you'd simply convey your affection through tiny smiles and eyes full of fondness, for the sake of not disturbing one another's personal bubble <3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ on occasion, when you're both up to it, you decide to do the reading outdoors! you'd go to check out new coffee shops and read while enjoying warm drinks and relish in each other's company. ⋅˚₊‧ you'd switch it up from time to time, and take your reading dates to libraries and parks^^ sungho says this allows you both to get out more, and that it's good to get some much needed sunshine! ☆૮꒰ˊᗜˋ* ꒱ა he'll also plan a day for you to visit art galleries or museums sometimes (if ur into that ^^) knowing you appreciate admiring art in all shapes and forms. he'll hold your hand as you both enjoy inspecting different exhibits and will point out the tiny details to you. he's just considerate like that :'( <3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ you both seem to favour library dates the most! you think it's probably because of the atmosphere there being so ideal for reading, the scent of books creating a sort of sanctuary, that you can escape to when you feel the need. of course, you're more than happy to take your wonderful lover with you, with whom you'd exchange lovesick giggle-inducing subtle touches of your fingertips over the table, warm palms resting on each other's thighs, all innocent and soft. you'd have to remind one another to quiet down at times, resuming to whisper silly jokes in each other's ear in hushed voices. the library seemingly exuding a certain air of romance too, apparently.. ૮ / / / ⍝ა ·˚
riwoo
𐚁๋࣭⊹ this baby is definitely the type to be more quiet and subtle with his reactions, smiling to himself whenever he spots you w a book in your hands and a concentrated look on your face, finding your habit of bringing it everywhere with you just so adorable.. </3 he'll be simply sitting there, silently watching with love in his eyes, in awe at the sight of you doing something you so dearly love 𐔌ᵔ⁔ ܸ. ̫ .⁔ ͡ 𐦯..
𐚁๋࣭⊹ he wouldn't mind at all, if you devote a big amount of your time to this hobby, as he thinks it's essential to have an outlet to release your tension through! he gets you the most, as he has his own form of escape that he indulges in quite often. riwoo's love for video games and your love for books don't make you clash, actually it's the total opposite!! it's both of you guys' favorite thing to share the same space, as you engage in your respective hobbies. the atmosphere always so harmonious and comfortable, as riwoo puts extra effort into keeping quiet, just so you can read in peace ૮₍ ˃̵͈᷄ . ˂̵͈᷅ ₎ა such a considerate lover :'( ♡
𐚁๋࣭⊹ on the weekends he'd organize cute little picnic dates for you! especially, when the weather's fine and the temperature is just right <3 he'd bring along jjangyi and daebak w him sometimes too! these instances filled with lots of laughter and fun ૮₍˃̵֊ ˂̵ ₎ა and of course, we can't forget that our boy has the biggest sweet tooth, so obviously there'll be various treats to munch on as you enjoy one another's company ^^ riwoo would totally blush so hard when you recite romantic quotes from books for him.. each of your words making his heart flutter, his demeanor visibly shy.. smiling at you giddily with rosy cheeks (◌´ ˘ `ς) he loves it so much pls </3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ as I mentioned before, riwoo will be super respectful of your reading time. he'll only occasionally pop in to softly ask if you need him to bring you anything, offering you snacks and water! >< but otherwise, he'll remain as silent as possible, not wanting to disturb you :( he might just settle next to you and lay his head in your lap as he closes his eyes, basking in the comfort of the moment.*·.˚⊹ other types of minimal skinship with him would include him idly playing with the fingers on your free hand, tucking a strand of hair that's fallen in your face back into its place, and pressing his lips to your shoulder / the top of your head as he passes past where you're situated. 。゜(՞っ ‹՞)
𐚁๋࣭⊹ riwoo gets so worried about you sometimes, and won't hold back on confronting you about paying more attention to your health! >:( will scold you if you stay up late to read, constantly emphasizing the importance of sleep. might also comment on your bad posture, as he delicately traces the line of your spine to ease the tension in your back. ૮(*´. . ) he'll also keep reminding you not to read in the dark, to avoid straining your eyes.. but besides just being fussy, he'll express his care through subtle acts of service^^ he'll put on some calm backround music if you're fine w that, clean your glasses for you (if you wear some) and leave silly little love notes in your books, just to make you giggle once you've found them. </3 he's the best really.... (ㅅ´ ˘ `)♡
jaehyun
𐚁๋࣭⊹ he's the embodiment of a super clingy boyfie, who's curious about everything you do! and your love for books certainly doesn't slip past him ^^ he finds it so very fascinating that you're able to occupy yourself for so long just reading words... on a piece of paper.. ₍ᐡ-᷅ ·̫ -᷄ᐡ₎? he actually thinks it's a really great skill, and he admires you immensely for it! I don't see him as the type to read, although he'd probably give it a try for your sake, to see what has you so entertained for hours on end!! ><
𐚁๋࣭⊹ but that won't really go far I fear.. after a couple of attempts, he says he'll just go back to his comics/manga.. (he's so totally the type to collect and read them hehe) might offer you try out his stuff too, but in the end you guys would probably decide to just stick to your own interests. ^^
𐚁๋࣭⊹ however! this doesn't mean jaehyun wouldn't absolutely adore being dragged to bookstores and book fairs, loving how excited you get over them!! ✩₊˚ he'd bring a bag with water bottles, snacks and a camera! you guys would probably go for a walk in the park afterwards, to eat and rest after a tiring day of browsing.. he'd pick delicate little flowers and put them in your hair prettily, secretly plotting to take lots of pictures of you like this (◠ᄉ ◠υ)♡ he has to put the camera to use after all!! ^^ he'll take on the responsibility to ensure your day goes perfectly, so that you're able to enjoy the experience to it's full potential! oh, how sweet he is,, please </3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ remember how I said he's clingy?? cuz I mean that with my entire being. he totally loves watching you do your own thing, don't get me wrong, his cheeks will get tired from smiling after staring at you for so long! :( but. he needs your attention too! he wants you to focus on him sometimes, with nothing else on your mind. he's such a baby about it too.. like "૮₍ •⤙•˶ა he'll keep bothering you until he successfully gets your attention, asking you with a pout to look at him!! >< and then will proceed to trap you with his arms in the world's tightest hug, just so you can't escape. </3 he just wants his baby all to himself.. ૮ -᷄ ˕ - ᷅ა
𐚁๋࣭⊹ but who says you can't do both at the same time?.. jaehyun absolutely adores the nights when you read to him before bed. <3 you're sitting up, while jaehyun is laying with his head tucked into your side, sharing warmth under the dim glow of the nightlight. this way he's able to cuddle with you, and you can get some reading done, everyone's happy! ദ്ദി˶ー̀֊ー́ ) ✧ the lovable puppy gets so snuggly and sleepy that he'll keep yawning in-between every couple sentences you read aloud.. :'( but he'll insist that you continue! since he wants you to finish the chapter. he'll hug your waist even closer, as his eyes gradually flutter shut and he can't fight the drowsiness anymore, dozing off to dreamland... ( ु⁎ᴗ_ᴗ⁎)ु.。when you notice that your baby's fallen asleep, a small smile tugs at your lips as you're putting down the book, pressing a soft kiss on his forehead before hugging him back and drifting off yourself. (っ˘·(˘ ᵜ ˘ ) <3
taesan
𐚁๋࣭⊹ i feel like, because he likes putting his thoughts and feelings into pretty words in order to incorporate them into his song lyrics, he'd like it a lot if his s/o also had a certain appreciation for eloquent words and such.. because, not only would this mean that you'd be able to fully grasp the meaning behind his work, but beyond that it would ensure that the both of you can understand each other's feelings well and communicate on a deeper level too. ^·^!
𐚁๋࣭⊹ another perk of this is that, he'd absolutely adore to receive handwritten letters from you!! as a an avid reader and hopeless romantic, you've always wanted to express your feelings of fondness toward your lover through this medium, but never got the chance to, until taesan.♡ he didn't make you feel odd for wanting to indulge in such an unconventional little pastime, quite the opposite actually! he would constantly be re-reading the letters, especially while away from you, tracing the lines of ink in your handwriting, thinking of you dearly.. :'( he'd keep them in the top drawer of his desk, neatly stacked, organized and well taken care of. ᨳᥩ ᪲◞ ◟)𑁬 <3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ it would always give him so much reassurance and make his heart tighten at the thought, that your love for him is unfaltering, and the letters only acted as clear evidence of that..♡ plus, he'd happily write some letters in response to your's!! he'd want to show his gratitude in some way, and he's also really into this old-fashioned way of communication, thinks it's romantic and so very intimate.. ૮( ˃ ꒳ ˂)ა ♡ˎˊ˗
𐚁๋࣭⊹ we shouldn't forget to mention that he's quite into reading himself as well! would be open to being introduced to new genres and tropes! and would most definitely listen to you go off about the book you're currently reading, actually soaking up all the details, besides just admiring your passion for the subject. I mean.. he's curious too!! ^^ <3 he'd read the books you like, in order to have something to talk with u about ! but he'll actually be really into them himself! ( ◜‿◝ )*.✧
𐚁๋࣭⊹ will definitely tag along when you go shopping for books! but most of the time you guys would actually plan the whole thing together, making it a date!! <3 it'd probably start off in a bookstore, with the both of you picking out books. sometimes you'd choose for each other and then surprise one another with them! >< the urge to read would most likely get you situated in a nearby cafe, where you'd fully immerse yourselves into your individual stories. you'd then discuss the topics explored in your books, as you hold hands on your way home. <3 such seemingly uneventful dates being your's and taesan's absolute favorite. ૮ ◜ᵕ◝ ྀིა ₊˚
leehan
𐚁๋࣭⊹ to leehan, your love for reading is one of your charming points, one of the reasons as to why he fell for you. (ˆ ̳ , ̫ , ̳ˆ)"੭ seeing you so into something that requires a lot of attention and dedication, makes him believe that you're an intricate person, somebody that's full of complexity and lots of layers, who also takes the time to grasp concepts and people thoroughly. he thinks of you very highly, respects you to no end and finds you to be the most intelligent person in his life, even if he himself isn't that well versed in literature. ૮ ․ ․ ᪲ა
𐚁๋࣭⊹ you usually tend to read at home, where you feel it's most comfortable and quiet. leehan is aware of this and doesn't really bother you, but when he sees you quietly tucked in a corner reading, all immersed in your book, he can't help but stop for a moment or two to admire your effortless beauty. >< to him, you're the most beautiful when you're doing the things you love doing, in your element and just being you. <3 after gazing at you from across the room for a bit, he'll slowly sneak up on you from the back, whispering a quiet "hey, baby." in your ear, placing a soft kiss to your neck. ૮₍ ྀི∩៸៸៸∩ ྀི₎ა
𐚁๋࣭⊹ you're so used to all this, that you know the next step will inevitably involve him finding his usual place on top of you, smoothly placing his body between your legs. he'll rest his head either on your chest or your tummy, with his arms snugly hugging your middle, asking you gently to please read aloud to him. he's just a gentle, lovesick boy.. ૮ ྀི◞͈ ˔ ◟͈ ྀིა
𐚁๋࣭⊹ truthfully, he's requesting this solely because he likes listening to you speak. he thinks your voice is the softest, and has a certain comforting tone to it. to him, it's one of the most captivating parts of you, the part that your inner beauty shines through <3 you're well aware of his hidden agenda, but he just looks so sweet with his head on your chest like this, and he's asking so nicely too.. :'( you have to give him what he wants. <3 so he lays there idly, admiring the way words take shape via your pretty voice, lips forming into a small smile, occasionally resting them on your belly in tiny, loving kisses. ( ᐡ. ̫ .ᐡ ) </3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ sometimes he'll fall asleep as you're reading to him, and other times, when he's feeling particularly invested in the story, he'll ask simple questions.. this just urges you to explain things to him in more detail, which, to leehan, ends up being way more entertaining than simply reading the book :') he likes listening to you reason and get all passionate about the subject, finding your display of intellect immensely attractive, and the glint of excitement in your eyes purely adorable. <3 <3
woonhak
𐚁๋࣭⊹ when he first discovered that you like to read, he was sort of intimidated by the fact, thinking he wouldn't be able to find common ground with you. (ˆ꜆ . ̫ . ).ᐟ but eventually he got over the initial fear, and decided to try out reading for himself!! of course the main purpose of his decision was to indulge in something his partner enjoys, in order to get closer to them, but he also wants to treat it as a chance to learn something from the experience, and grow as a person! ˎˊ˗ what a cutie he is ><
𐚁๋࣭⊹ he'll be the most adorable, excitable boy asking you for book recommendations ૮ ´ ˘ ` ა <3 he's so enthusiastic about it that your heart wouldn't be able to take it, seeing how eager he is to try out reading just for you. :'(( you'd take him to a bookstore, so he can pick out the book himself! since you're unsure of what he'll like, you wanna give him a chance to find something that strikes his interest !! <3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ but baby is a bit overwhelmed with all the genres and so so many books to choose from.. (՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞) that eventually he just asks for your help. so with your help and suggestions, you guys are able to find one that he's into ! (✿◠ᴗ◠) he'll start reading it on the same day right before bed, so he can give you some kind of feedback on it the next day, but.. he gets distracted a few pages in and drifts off to sleep ૮ ྀི ◞ ◟ ა </3
𐚁๋࣭⊹ will definitely observe you closely and with awe as you're reading, aand if you're annotating too, he'll be straight up transfixed on each of your tiny movements. he's just so fascinated with the fact that so much work goes into reading a book (* ॑ ॑* )?? asks you questions and also to teach him how to do it, bcuz he's secretly planning to try and annotate a book for you :( for that he'll probably pick out one of your most favorites, wanting to surprise you with it ! </3 woonhak is the most thoughtful boy :(
𐚁๋࣭⊹ I feel as though, once he finds a genre he really enjoys, he's gonna adore reading! (even if it takes him a while to finish a book^^) so much so that he'd make solo trips to the bookstore, just to find some books similar to the one he just finished! (..◜ᴗ◝..) and while he's there, he'll look around for you as well, already giddy at the thought of gifting you a book, knowing you'll be ecstatic about it! ♡ˎˊ˗ I can just picture woonhak with a bright smile on his face, browsing through shelves full of books, looking for one that his lover will like.. (๑•́ ᎔ ก̀๑) on top of this, he'll get you all the necessary supplies, like colorful sticky tabs and pretty pens and pastel highlighters he's seen you using.. lovely baby just wants to make you happy :( <3
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stardust-kenobi · 1 year ago
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The Wrong Ingredient
Severus Snape x Fem!Reader
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Summary: As a teaching assistant at Hogwarts, working on creating a new calming draught seemed to be a straightforward task. However, when you accidentally use the wrong ingredient, Professor Snape is more than willing to help alleviate the effects.
Word count: 4k
Warning: smut, fingering, piv, sex pollen (my fav), sort-of teacher/student relationship (reader is 2 years post graduation), mild DUB CON
A/N: Apologies to my followers who are not interested in Harry Potter content. This is my first (and potentially only) fic I am writing for Harry Potter, I just have had an insane infatuation with Severus Snape this week and I just had to write this to get it off my mind lol. Feel free to disregard :)
Read on AO3
The roaring of the snowstorm grew louder by the moment as you tried so desperately to focus on perfecting the potions assignment for the Professor. You were distracted by the storm, entranced by the blanket of white that coated the roof and distant hills. With the halls of Hogwarts empty for the Holiday break, you felt an even deeper appreciation for the warmth and coziness inside the castle.
As a recent graduate of Hogwarts who was now assigned to be a teaching assistant in your second year after graduation, part of your job was helping the professors with their lesson plans. Even if that meant sacrificing part of your holiday break spending the day alone…with Professor Snape. Persistent footsteps approached you, entering the classroom, followed by the sound of a slamming door. You jolted in your seat. 
“Any progress?” Professor Snape asked blankly.
During your studies at Hogwarts, you were always fond of Professor Snape. He was cold and stern, something that usually would have made you weary of a person, but there was something about his demeanor and the way he cared for you that created a soft spot for him in your heart. You had to admit, though, he was hard to talk to at times. He was not a man for many words, so even though you enjoyed him as a professor, there was a bit of unexpected tension being alone with him. You could not deny, though, that you found him to be extremely attractive. 
You sighed and hesitated to look back at him. Snape will be disappointed in your response. 
“Unfortunately, no” you breathed. 
“Pity” He scoffed, but ended with the faintest smirk. He was hard on you the same as he was when he was your professor, but he made some fun of it every now and then.
“Sorry, Professor Snape. I just don’t think these ingredients will work” 
“It’s experimental, Y/N, we won’t know until it is done” He shrugged. 
You were working on a high-intensity calming draught. A harmless potion that many wizards and witches could find great use in, especially during high-stress situations. The ingredients were simple, but they just didn’t make sense to you. 
Lavender, crocodile heart, rose petals, and peppermint. 
You read the list back to yourself several times. You weren’t getting the reaction you’d hoped for inside the simmering pot, and the ingredients weren’t behaving as you’d expected as you followed the procedure you were familiar with.
“Sometimes the best way to test potions is to try them yourself” Snape spoke with a condescending tone as he noticed your hesitation. 
“Are you suggesting I just drink this myself and see if it works?” You reiterated and trailed with a light chuckle.
“If you won’t, I will” He shrugged and smirked back at you from across the room. Professor Snape was professional, of course, but he was right. Sometimes trial and error is the quickest way to test potions. The ingredients were simple, so the chance of them causing any harm was…potentially slim. 
The day was long and you had grown tired of staring into the stirring liquid.
Fine, you thought, what is the worst that could happen?
You poured the purple-hued brew into the glass in front of you. Without thinking too much more about it, you threw back the potion, letting it trickle down your throat. It was potent, minty, and slightly earthy. Not the worst potion you’d tasted…but not the best either.
Your face twisted in uncertainty for the flavor.
Snape held his eyes to the book in front of him as he sat at his desk across the room. He was wildly uninterested in the reaction or the success of the potion you’d brewed. He had more important things to handle, and an experimental calming draught for a future lesson plan was low on his priority list, so of course, that means you were the one to take on the task.
You waited for a reaction.
And waited.
Nothing. You felt nothing. 
Just before you were going to give up and accept the defeat, you actually began to feel something. It was warm and fuzzy, laced in your veins and flowed slowly up your arms. 
Perhaps this is the beginning of the calming effects, you thought. 
The warmth felt funny as it seeped deeper into your bloodstream. Before you knew it, each of your extremities flowed hot with its calming effects. But there was something else. Something you’d never felt from a potion before. A tingling and most desperate sensation found its way between your legs. 
“P-Professor?” You struggled to call out to him, suddenly weary of how you were beginning to feel. You swallowed hard. 
“Yes, Y/N?” He called back, his eyes still glued to the book.
“Are there any…similar potions that I could have accidentally created instead of the calming draught?”
He looked up suddenly. 
“No, there is-....” Snape stopped mid-sentence, setting the book down gently, “Well perhaps, but you would know the difference between peppermint and spearmint”
You looked down at the extra green leaves that remained unused near the pot. You had collected this from a different area of the field than normal, but it smelled and looked like peppermint, so you did not think twice about it. However, now that he questions it, you worry it was, indeed, something else. 
“Let's just say maybe I didn’t, though. If I accidentally used spearmint, what would that mean?” You countered nervously.
His eyes grew wide for a moment. 
“Show me the plant” He insisted. Snape quickly rose from his seat and walked over to your desk. 
You showed him the green leaves you believed to be peppermint. He towered over you.
“It's peppermint, right?” You asked wearily, looking up to him. His furrowed brows revealed his concern.
“No. This is certainly spearmint” He pressed his lips tightly together and twisted the stem between his fingers. 
Your heart sank. What had you done?
“What… what did I brew, then?” You asked cautiously. 
Snape appeared more worrisome and now even a bit uncomfortable. 
“What do you feel?” He asked slowly and cautiously rather than answering your question.
You were hesitant to tell the truth and he could sense it. 
“I feel very warm… and quite…um” You trailed off as you felt your heart beating a hundred miles an hour. Suddenly you felt a raging sense of attraction to his natural musk and cologne. God, was he always so breathtaking?
“Aroused?” He questioned. 
“Yes”. You squeezed your eyes shut. Your cheeks rushed with blood as your response was trailed by a muffled moan. You were embarrassed to admit feeling this way in front of Professor Snape, but there was nothing you could do to stop it. And to hear your professor of many years, and now your colleague, ask you if you felt any sense of sexual arousal made you excited, too. 
“I feared as much” He turned away slowly, bringing his hand to cover his mouth. 
“Professor wha-”
“Quiet. Give me a moment to think” Snape demanded. He paced the room slowly. 
It grew more intense with each passing second. The tingling created a sensitivity upon the surface of your skin. You grazed your arm with your fingertips and chills shot down your spine. 
You clenched your thighs together as your arousal intensified. The professor turned around at this same moment, and let his eyes catch sight of your discomfort. 
He looks good today, you thought to yourself. His jet-black hair fell so beautifully atop his shoulders, and his dark attire somehow never looked better than it did right now with the way it draped down the length of his body. 
“You’ve created something that many have experimented with in the past, but… it's not well documented. It’s dangerous. Think similar to a love potion, however…much more potent” Snape explained, ending his pacing right at your desk once again. His emphasis toward the end was all you needed to hear.  You could tell he was attempting to maintain his composure but you could also sense he was on edge.
“Oh, God” You cried, lowering your head to look down at your feet, “What do I do, Professor?” You begged. Your fists clenched the edges of the table. You needed a release. Or an antidote. “What is the recipe for the antidote?” 
Truly, you wanted the release. Your staff dormitory was nearby, just right down the hall, you could take care of this quickly. Snape looked around, ensuring you were both alone, then used a quick flick of his wand to close the shutters on the windows. It was dimly lit in the classroom now with only the light of many candles illuminating each corner of the room. It was…romantic. Most everyone in the castle was gone. Any remaining professors were locked away in their offices, and the students were well on their way home by now. 
“There isn’t one” He stated firmly. The warm amber luminescence glowed so beautifully upon his skin. 
The effects of the accidental potion were nearing unbearable, now. Every fiber of your being ached so desperately to be touched. 
“Fuck…I…I need” You breathed heavily, clenching your lower belly as your arousal pooled itself between your legs. Your cunt begged you for something…anything. You’d never cussed in front of Professor Snape before, but he could feel the urgency in your voice.
“You must relieve it” He snapped. Frustrated with the decision he knew was about to have to make.
“Severus…” You begged desperately, using his first name for the first time ever. You weren’t even sure what you were begging him for. 
“I must speak bluntly, Ms. Y/L/N, so listen carefully. You are no longer my student. I am not your professor. But this must happen in order to save you.” He began frantically, checking again to make sure the doors were locked. His clarification of your relationship with one another seemed to be more of a reminder for himself than for you. 
“Save me? Christ, will this kill me?” You cried out.
“Yes. If your body is not brought to orgasm several times, it will begin to affect the very core of your nervous system. There is no other way to stop it.” He explained. Hearing him talk about orgasms was unexpected but it aroused you.
Dammit, you thought, can’t he just fuck me? 
No. No matter how much you wanted him right now, you did not want to put him in that position. 
“Okay, I will…I will go back to my room now” You managed to say. He sighed in anticipation of what he would say next. 
“You can’t do it yourself” He began, his voice faltering as he failed to make eye contact with you, “It has to be another person”.
Snape knew exactly what had to be done. The moment he saw the spearmint you placed in his hand, he knew. 
Suddenly, your legs trembled beneath you and your knees buckled. As you felt yourself fall, Professor Snape quickly caught you. His arms wrapped beneath your arms and he lifted you up onto the desk. You whimpered in reaction to this contact against your skin. It was…electrifying, but you were running out of time. Your body was running hotter by the second. In a feeble attempt to cool yourself, you peeled the robe from your shoulder. 
“Please” You begged, gesturing to the fabric that held you hostage in your misery. 
“I-” Snape began, reaching to grab your robe. His eyes searched yours for uncertainty but found none. The expression he held revealed what he couldn’t say. He wanted you. He wanted to help in more ways than one. But no matter what he told himself, he couldn’t help but feel that it was wrong. 
While you squirmed on the table, you watched as Professor Snape eyed the remaining liquid in the cauldron. It was only a few drops, but it was enough to at least bring a man to his knees for a woman begging him to fuck her. But he didn’t need it in order to want you. Snape needed it to convince himself it wasn’t wrong. 
He breathed out heavily before pouring the few drops into the glass and throwing it back, getting as much as he possibly could. Snape winced at the flavor. 
“Professor…w-what are you doing?” You whimpered through your words. 
“We both took the potion. We thought it was a calming draught, and it wasn’t. And we did what we had to do to treat the effects” He responded quickly as if it was rehearsed. You knew what he was insinuating. If anyone found out, if anyone asked, that’s what happened. If Snape was under the effects of this potion too, he would need his release, same as you. With only a few drops, It would be less intense for him, so he could better handle himself. 
“If you’ll allow me, I will help you, my dear” He whispered as he came closer to you propped on the table, holding his face close to yours, speaking sensually against your lips. In one swift motion, he pulled the black robe off your shoulders, letting it rest on the table, leaving you in your sweater and mini skirt. 
Before you could even finish your nod of approval, the hem of your skirt was being pulled up frantically, followed by his wandering fingers that stopped just at the hem of your panties. You were practically dripping and he could feel it. 
“Oh darling” He groaned, standing between your open legs and pressing his lips against your ear. Every hair on your body stood up when he finally got this close to you, “You are so wet for me” 
You rolled your hips against his hovering fingertips. As you looked down, you faintly noticed the bulge that grew in his pants. You weren’t sure if it was the microdose of the potion, or how arousing it was to be in this situation with you, but it was a most intoxicating sight. You could feel the heat radiating from him and knew that he was fully under the effects of the potion. Not nearly as badly as you, but he was about to lose control.
“Professor Snape, I can’t take it anymore, please” You begged him. You needed something inside of you, now.
“Very well” He smirked subtly as he pulled the soaked fabric to the side and pressed his fingers flush against your clit before rubbing rhythmic circles. 
“Fuck!” You cried out and threw your head back, which was quickly caught by Snape’s hand. He held your head up to meet his gaze. The aching and burning persisted but were soothed slightly once his skin was upon yours. It was a surprise to be so reactive to the faintest of touch, but the angry fever burning your skin was electrified, enhancing every single one of your senses. 
“Look at me, Y/N. Oh, you sound so lovely” His voice was like honey as he talked you through your pleasure, admiring the sounds that flew from your lips.  
You locked your gaze with his and stared deep into him. 
It was overwhelming. All of it. The state of your writhing body. The way he looked towering over you. The feeling of his fingers on your delicate bud. Seeing him in such a vulnerable state, something you’d never thought you’d see in a million years. It was all so incredible and absolutely riveting. You thought you might be dreaming.
Snape’s thumb remained working at your clit while two fingers were suddenly pushed inside your cunt. Your walls clenched around his digits as he began pumping them in and out, curling them with every stroke. 
“You need to come. Come for me” He insisted, knowing that the first orgasm would help begin to subside your symptoms. You could’ve reached your high just from the sound of his voice alone, so you knew you were close already. 
Your mouth fell open as the tightest coil of nerves bundled at your core. Suddenly, without hardly any warning from your own body, your orgasm burst open, radiating and flowing through every fiber of your being. Stars danced in your eyes as the euphoria washed over you. Moaning and profanities filled the air, breathless and aggressive as it took you over. 
“That’s it, my love, just like that” He encouraged you through it, keeping his pace while he fucked you with his fingers. You curled your hips, riding his hand instinctively. You came down so slowly, feeling delirious but still hungry for more. More of him.
His cock was stiffened and strained in his trousers, begging to be released, but not until he ensured you were okay after your first high. You reached for the hem of his pants in desperation. 
“I need it” You struggled to form your words. 
“You need my cock? Is that what you need?” He whispered to you, watching your face twist in pleasure as his fingers curled harder with each thrust. 
“Please, Professor” You begged. There was something so hot about calling him that in this setting. He could never admit it, but he loved it, too. 
“As you wish”
He pulled his fingers from your pussy, leaving you empty and clenching around nothing. You whined at the loss.
He watched you struggle to remove your sweater and glided his hands up the side of your body to help pull it over your head, which revealed you wore no bra underneath. Snape growled lowly in approval of the sight. Your bare breasts glistened with sweat under the candlelight. He delicately trailed his fingers down the front of your body, circling your stiffened nipples along the way.
For the first time, he kissed you. His supple lips pressed firmly into yours, adding another layer of intimacy you were not expecting. You moaned into him, feeling his hands cup your burning cheeks as he pulled you into him. As you sat at the edge of the table with Snape positioned between your legs, you felt him shuffle with the clasp of his pants. 
Excitedly, you pulled away from the kiss to see his impressive length released from its restraints. Your thighs clenched together at the sight, which caused you to moan. You could see it on his face, he was burning with the same passion, but he was nervous. Maybe with less of the potency of your accidental creation, you would have had the luxury of anxiety, but not in this state. 
“Are you doing alright?” He asked you, one hand on the back of your neck, forcing your gaze onto him, and the other grasping the base of his cock, ready to give you exactly what you needed. What he needed. 
“More than alright” You breathed. 
“Good” He smiled back at you. You realized in this moment that he’d never fully smiled at you before, and it warmed your heart. 
Hurriedly, he yanked your panties off your body, throwing them to the ground. He pushed up your skirt, making sure it was out of the way. Ever-so-conveniently, the table was at his hips’ level, putting his cock at the perfect height.
He plunged into you, hard. A strangled, choked whimper caught in your throat as you felt overwhelmed with the fullness. Professor Snape sucked in a sharp breath, pleased with how you wrapped around his cock so perfectly. 
“Oh my God” You cried out as he began thrusting slowly, allowing you to adjust to him. It could not last long though, because Snape could feel the animalistic urges overcoming him. 
“Oh, fuck” He groaned deeply, staring down to where his cock disappeared inside of you. 
Something unraveled within Snape. His cautious demeanor was long gone. His brows furrowed into almost an angry expression as he snapped his hips passionately, fucking you hard and ruthlessly now. Your whole body tingled and spasmed in reaction to each thrust. His cock stretched you so wonderfully, and he was intoxicated by the way you took him. Like you were made for him. His hands gripped both sides of your waist, using your curves as leverage to go deeper. 
“You take my cock so well, darling” He praised, increasing his pace.
“It feels s-so fucking good, Professor. I’m going to come again, please…don’t s-s-stop” You stuttered, tripping over your own words as you felt drunk off the pleasure. With the rise of your next orgasm came the subsiding of the heat that coursed through your veins. 
“My pretty little whore, come on my cock” He growled, angling his hips at a deeper angle so that his cock brushed your most sensitive area with each thrust. 
It came over you again so suddenly, sending your body into a pleasurable convulsion. Snape pushed you backward, laying you flat on your back atop the table, and wrapped his fist around your throat. The pressure against your neck made your mind go fuzzy as you rode the high of your second orgasm. 
It felt…otherworldly. Like nothing you could’ve ever imagined. He faltered none in his thrusts as you floated through such indescribable euphoria. As you came back to what felt like reality, you opened your eyes to see Snape admiring you in your most vulnerable state, continuously taking his cock like you were made for it. 
Just one more. You only needed one more. You could feel it. One more orgasm would treat these effects. The only problem was, your body was weakening, and you weren’t sure if you could take it.
“One more, darling. Just one more” He breathed through his moans.
“I-I can’t” You cried. 
“You can. You must, Y/N.” He reminded you with encouragement, “Be a good girl and give me one more”
You nodded weakly. While he fucked you hard, he brought his fingers up to your swollen clit to bring you to your third release. You spasmed beneath his touch. It felt so good. Too good. You squirmed involuntarily, but Snape was not having it. He pulled his length out of you and quickly turned you around, bending you forward to press your face into the table. 
Before you could even process what was happening, he sunk himself back into you from behind and resumed his relentless thrusts. He could hold you down better in this position. He was more in control. 
Even quicker than the first two, your third orgasm unleashed itself upon your body. You writhed and cried out his name, mixed with other profanities as it washed over you. You had an unfamiliar feeling coiling in your lower belly. Before you knew it was even happening, you were squirting through your orgasm, something that had never happened before.  Snape groaned lowly in approval. 
This orgasm was followed by an icy flush that mixed with your blood, taking the burning sensation away completely. It was an ultimate feeling of relief. The pleasure was so intense, a stray tear trickled down your cheek.
“I am close” Professor Snape muttered.
“Come inside me, professor” You whimpered, sending him over the edge instantly.
His thrusts faltered and slowed as a warmth spilled deep inside your walls, coating your cunt completely. Snape bent over to press his chest into your back as he caught his breath. You both were slowly coming down from not only your release, but from the effects of the potion. You expected to feel shame or embarrassment, but neither occurred. 
He was careful pulling out of you, knowing how weak your legs probably were. You tried to catch your breath as he offered his hand, helping you to your seat near the table. 
Without another word, he helped you back into your sweater to allow you to regain your decency as soon as you could. It was hard to process what had just happened, but you truly did not regret even a single second of it. 
“I am sorry for what had to happen, Ms. Y/L/N” Professor Snape said as he kneeled down to look at you. His eyes looked sorrowful and full of guilt, like he blamed himself for what happened. It broke your heart to think he felt this way. You enjoyed this and you know he did too. 
You smiled and held a sleepy expression as you giggled and shook your head. 
“I’m not” You confidently responded.
The same smile you saw for the first time earlier returned to his lips.
“Good” He muttered. 
——-
Please forgive any canon inconsistencies. This was entirely self-indulgent lmaooo. Obviously this potion does not exist and I made it up based on actual calming draught ingredients!
1K notes · View notes
gemini-atz · 1 month ago
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Seonghwa as your Boyfriend₊˚⊹♡
('Realistic Imagines' + Astrology Based)
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Background/Disclaimer: !!This is all my own interpretation based on my personal astrology knowledge and research. I consider myself an amateur!!
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✩Gemini Notes✩ IDK what happened but I ended up getting really into writing the NSFW part of this and it got long so I'm making a part 2 for it which I'll post tomorrow night! I'll create a link at the end of this post and in my Astrology Series Pinned post. If you'd like a tag please comment!
SEONGHWA SUN Aries MOON Cancer MERCURY Aries VENUS Aquarius MARS Aries
Dating Seonghwa is pretty much like being with your best friend. He's such a caretaker and protector in your life almost from the moment he enters it. You guys probably had a base of friendship for a bit before you started dating, and it would have probably (definitely) been you crushing on Seonghwa hard first before he even notices his own feelings for you.
Aquarius Venus and really anyone with their Venus in an Air sign tend to seek intellectual or stimulating connections with people before falling romantically. For Seonghwa his partner should be someone he also considers a close friend. He'd be like the guy you'd meet in your second year of college in class because you were put in a group for an assignment and of COURSE you two turned out to be the only two that even gave a shit and tried. Showing a sincere interest in his hobbies or likes would really endear him to you, and he would try to return the favor by getting into yours. For Seonghwa, a comfortable kind of friends to lovers thing is ideal. He loves spending quality time with you but his idea of quality time is very much giving parallel play, where you both do your own thing in the same room, maybe listening to a playlist you made together. With his three Aries placements, he has the potential to have a really explosive temper. It's a little diminished by his Moon in Cancer but he's probably the type of guy who holds in all his annoyances until he can just get them out at the end of the day either through his hobbies or physical activity. Basically, he likes to keep his mind focused and his hands busy. Air Venus signs can come off as aloof occasionally to other passionate signs who literally want to be with you all the time. He's the kind of boyfriend that will give you some space if you need it, because he'll need it too. You'll be soooo tempted to go an interrupt him when he's focused on his Legos because he's just so beautiful and cute when he's focusing but the thing he loves about you is how much understanding you always give him; its all you can do to just kiss his forehead and go to read a book while laying on the couch. Eventually he'd come over to you, bouncy and energized and flop onto the couch, wiggling up to rest his face into your chest and wrapping warm, solid arms around you. "Can I show you the set I just built?" He'd ask, and of course you say yes! His eyes get so sparkly while he shows it off to you, smiling so proudly at your reactions. If you're a person who loves being spontaneous or adventurous with your plans, having Seonghwa as your boyfriend means you two will genuinely have a lot of fun together. He's the boyfriend that wants genuinely does want to go to art museums and fashion archive exhibits with you, and you guys can chat excitably about your opinions of different works, be it games, anime, fashion or music. As a couple, you are always ready to try something new and probably always have weekend plans.
As a Cancer Moon Seonghwa might gravitate toward the caretaker role in your relationship and tends to anticipate your own needs before you do, just doing little actions to look after you, like preparing your coffee or tea in the morning while you rush around getting ready for work. He isn't super big on PDA, maybe holding hands in public is as much as he's comfortable with but once you're alone....he's your personal giant teddy bear. So many hugs, so many cuddle sessions where you both play on your Switches and pause occasionally to show each other something cool or cute in your game.
You'll end up thinking its funny that some people have the impression your boyfriend is quiet or shy; If he's not saying anything, he just might not be interested in the conversation. Once you get him talking about his interests he's a certified YAPPER. And, surprisingly one of the most stubborn people you have ever met. Like, good luck feeling like you can ever "win" an argument. With both a Sun and Mars in Aries, Seonghwa feels like he can give you energy just from being near him. Aries men tend to have a lot of physical stamina and can push themselves pretty far in that aspect.
Which brings me to my next point......
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NSFW
I see Seonghwa as someone who eventually gets into orgasm denial on his partner because of just how long he can go for. That Aries stamina feels like he's the type who can cum and be ready to go again faster than you were expecting.
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hs-is-loml · 2 years ago
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Avoid. (x.t)
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Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x Reader
Summary: blurb! after thinking about something bianca said to you a few days ago, you started to create a small distance from your boyfriend. which of course he noticed.
Warnings: established relationship, self-doubt, the smallest bit of angst, fluff ending
a/n: okay, so i ended up not reading my textbook, and worked on other things instead... but anyways enough about that just remember you are always more than enough<3
masterlist
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“You look awfully lonely,” a voice said from beside you. "You mind if I join?"
Your gaze moved from the pavement to a pair of green eyes that you knew far too well.
“I was enjoying a moment of peace actually,” you responded to the boy before you continued to look ahead at the path in front of you that led into the city.
“Moment of peace or are you avoiding me?” Xavier countered with his eyebrows raised giving you a knowing look.
“No, I definitely think it was for a moment of peace,” you replied pausing for a second. “From you…”
“I KNEW IT!”
“You don’t have to be so loud, it’s only us,” you laughed at the boy’s reaction.
“Wait. Why have you been avoiding me? You haven’t even responded to my texts earlier,” Xavier asked with a worried tone.
“I ran into someone a few days ago, and they made me realized something,” you answered wanting to move on from the topic.
“And what did they make you realized?”
“That I shouldn’t get to attached.”
“That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard,” Xavier uttered.
“Xavier, it’s nothing personal,” you lied. “I don’t want to hold you back.”
What really happened was a few days ago Bianca came up to you sprouting thoughts of doubt about your relationship with Xavier throughout your mind. She talked about how this was only temporary for him until he would eventually get bored and come back to her. You knew that wouldn’t actually happen, but it didn’t stop you from creating more distance between you and Xavier for the past few days.
“I think you ignoring me is definitely personal,” he scoffed. “Y/n, it takes two people to be in a relationship.”
“Which two people,” you said under your breathe though he was still able to pick up what you whispered.
“No, seriously, what is your problem with me right now?”
“Why don’t you ask her?” you snapped quickening your pace to walk ahead of him. “You always go back to her don’t you?”
“Who?” Xavier asked in the most utter confusion.
“Bianca.”
“Why would I go back to her? I have you.”
“What if I not enough?” you blurted out stopping in your tracks to turn around and face him.
“You are more enough. You’re all I need,” Xavier walked closer to you.
“I-”
“You are the only person that I want,” he wrapped his arms around you allowing you to lean your head against his chest.
“I’m sorry,” you apologized.
“No, you have nothing to be sorry for.”
“No, I do. I shouldn’t have let Bianca have that much power over our relationship,” you admitted. “I was just scared that what if you got bored with being with me?”
“How could I ever get bored? I could stare at you for hours,” he laughed.
“You’re only saying that because you need a model to draw,” you pushed him away laughing.
“I don’t need a model if you’re my muse,” he joked.
“Maybe I was right for avoiding you.” you said walking faster to the city.
“Wait! Hey! NO MORE AVOIDING.”
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pinksturniolo · 7 months ago
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Biggest Hater - Part One
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Matt Sturniolo x Fem Reader
Part 1 of 2
Alternate version of my Chris fic: Biggest Fan
Requested by the baddest! @muwapsturniolo
Summary: You just don’t get the hype of the Sturniolo Triplets like almost every girl your age does. It probably has a lot to do with the fact that you went to high school with them and Matt Sturniolo particularly, got on your nerves more than anyone you thought ever could. In fact, it has everything to do with that. And when you run into him a couple years later, at the peak of their fame, your feelings haven’t changed one bit. No matter how attractive you find him.
Content warnings: smut, fingering, thigh riding, car sex, loss of reader's virginity, mean!matt (even tho he’s an angel irl), ANGST AF, enemies to lovers trope (somewhat?), slightly toxic, weed smoking
disclaimer: matt and reader are both of age in the prom flashback. also, dont drive under the influence if that wasnt already obvious lol
word count: 4,325
Hate is a strong word. What does it really mean to hate someone? It’s a powerful human emotion that many say is dangerously close to the emotion of love. To feel so strongly about someone, that every time you see them or hear their name it evokes a strong reaction in you, can cause your heart to race in your chest, and your hands to shake.
That’s how you felt every time you saw or heard of Matt. Whenever you visit your family home in Somerville, that’s practically all you hear people talk about. How famous he and his brothers are now and how successful they’ve become. Literally every girl you know has a crush on them. Even your roommate, Stephanie. It gives you a migraine how much people talk about them.
You couldn’t help how much of a hater you were. It wasn’t like you to be like this, you were usually supportive of mostly everyone, especially people you knew or grew up with. You went to high school with the triplets, so you had the privilege firsthand to experience how they were before their YouTube fame.
Chris was funny, always making jokes in class and very talkative. You didn’t mind him as much, during the few interactions you had with him, you found him to be sweet and he was known as kind of a player, but you never saw or heard of him treating a girl with disrespect.
Nick was outspoken and opiniated which you appreciated, and always nice to everyone. You actually got along with him really well, usually pairing up with him for projects in the biology class you two had together. He even invited you over to his house to hang out a couple times, but you politely declined. You adored him but there was one person you just could not be around that would be there.
Matt. He got on your last nerve like no other. He had the worst attitude, and it bothered the fuck out of you. He was pretty quiet, and he often missed school. But the times you were around him, he gave you the dirtiest looks and rolled his eyes whenever you spoke. Why? You had no clue. He was also an instigator, constantly pitting you against Chris and Nick for no reason, which they usually ignored but it pissed you off, nonetheless. There was just something about him that fueled rage in you like you’ve never felt. And it did not help that you were so goddamn attracted to him.
Let’s be honest, all that tension and angst is bound to create a type of energy that just can’t be ignored. Even if it’s caused by someone you can’t stand.
Then, came senior prom. The events of that night and what happened after, forever solidified your hateful feelings towards him.
You had gone with separate dates of course, but somehow ended up alone together by the end of the night. You had a suspicion that your friends and his brothers had something to do with it, but you sat in awkward silence and moping next to him on the bleachers as the rest of your senior class danced on the gym floor.
Large social events like this were not your cup of tea and neither for Matt. You rest your chin in your hand as you lean on your knees, watching your date dance like an idiot. He was your ride home and you were starting to get fed up, tempted to call your parents to pick you up or even order an Uber.
“What an idiot.” Matt says to you, his eyes also on your date.
You scoff, “Yeah, tell me about it.”
“I mean, I knew you were a loser, but I didn’t think you were that desperate.”
You turn to glare at him. “I don’t see your pathetic date anywhere.”
“She was talking too much for my liking.”
“Wow, what a gentleman you are.” You shake your head, eyeing his outfit up and down. “Looks like you didn’t put much effort into your appearance either, so she must not be that special.”
He smirks at your response, his eyes on your body as well. “I wouldn’t be saying anything with that tacky dress you have on.”
You hit him on the arm, anger filling you from his words. “You’re such a dick.”
“Ow!” Matt rubs his arm, his face scrunched up in pain. “Now I see why your date left you, you really are a brat.”
You huff in annoyance, beginning to wonder why you were even sitting here next to him. You stand up, picking your dress up from around your feet so you can step down the bleachers.
“Wait, hold on.” Matt says suddenly, wrapping his hand around your wrist to stop you from leaving.
You stop and look at him, your eyebrows raised in expectation. His fingertips burn into you and his eyes somewhat soften when you look into them.
“Fuck- my bad. I’ll stop, I promise.” he says, stopping you from leaving.
You’re surprised at his words and his fingers removed from around your wrist, when he sees that you’re not leaving, standing over him. He avoids eye contact with you while you stare at the side of his face, his hands now stuffed in the pockets of his suit pants.
His hair is longer now than it usually was, a middle part that showed more of his face and he wore a pair of earrings that you secretly liked. Despite your earlier comment, you also thought the suit looked really good on him. Matt had always had a good sense of fashion, but if anyone asked you, you would say his wardrobe is basic and unattractive.
“You better have a good reason for me to stay Matt because I’m starting to get tired and I just wanna go lay in my bed.” You tell him, waiting for him to say something, your arms crossed.
It’s then that he pulls a joint from his pocket, a mischievous look on his face.
“You can get stoned with me and relax for once in your life.” He says and you hesitate for a second before he stands up, and starts walking down the bleachers, motioning for you to follow.
You don’t know why, but your feet seem to have a mind of their own as you follow him, out of the gym and around the corner of the school. At this point you really had nothing better to do, even if it meant getting high with Matt.
He leads you to the football field across from the gym to the press box at the top of the stadium. You both sit inside, smoke starting to fill the small room as you and Matt pass the joint back and forth until it’s finished.
You both are actually engaged in a conversation that isn’t an argument for once and you find yourself giggling with him. Whether it’s because of the weed or because it’s prom night, you’re not sure.
You look at your phone, the time now almost midnight. “I should probably head home.” You say, getting ready to call your parents.
“Do you have a curfew?” Matt asks, a look on his face like he’s hoping you’ll say no.
“Not really…” you answer, setting your phone back down on your lap.
“Wanna go for a drive?”
Matt watches with a smile as you as you catch your breath, laughing hysterically from his spot-on impression of Nick when he’s angry. You wipe the tears from your eyes, having laughed so hard you were crying. Your hair has fallen from the perfect curls you took extra time on earlier, the strap of your dress sliding down your left shoulder.
He realizes you have a nice laugh, not hearing it often since you’re always pissed off around him. You look beautiful, even more than you usually do, especially like this. The moonlight shines on your skin and he can’t help but stare at you until you catch him, and he looks away shyly, his heart starting to pound in his chest.
You’ve both been sitting here for the past 30 minutes, parked at the now empty neighborhood playground by your house. Matt had driven around for a while, even stopped to get McDonald’s, before he decided the night wasn’t over just yet and lit up another joint after your highs came down.
Now you both were absolutely shitfaced, having the most fun you’ve had in a while. It’s surprising how much you and Matt actually get along under the influence, probably because it calmed you both down enough to forget your stubborn tempers and just enjoy good conversation and laughter.
“Why didn’t you ever come hang out when Nick invited you over? I’m having a blast right now.” Matt says, leaning his seat back a little to relax.
“I think you already know that answer.” You reply, and your eyes trail down his body and the way it looks as he leans back. He removed his suit jacket when you guys were in the drive thru earlier, and the sleeves of his white dress shirt are rolled up, his tie loose around his neck.
“Come on, you can’t really hate me that much can you?”
You sigh, looking away from him and out the window. Of course, he’s oblivious to how much he would actually bother you.
“Are you really that clueless?” You ask and look back at him. His eyes are glazed over and slightly red but incredibly blue.
“When it comes to you… yes.”
You scoff and roll your eyes, ignoring his response while brushing a hand through your hair and picking it up off the back of your neck. “God, its hot in here.” You say and he watches as you move your hair and lean your head to the side, your lips parted. Your slender neck looks inviting, and he can see your pulse jump.
He rolls the windows down slightly, letting most of the weed smoke filter out. His eyes are still on your face and when you return his gaze, this time, he doesn’t shy away.
“What?” You ask, the look on his face makes you nervous. He licks his lips as he looks back and forth between your eyes and your mouth, his jaw clenching.
The smoke has cleared but the air feels incredibly tense now as you stare back. Soft music plays on the radio and the wind blows through the trees outside. You feel like you’ve been transported to an alternate reality, the turn this night has taken starting to not feel real.
“Has anyone ever kissed you before?” Matt finally speaks, his voice barely above a whisper.
You feel your face heat in embarrassment at his question. “Uh… n-no.”
You internally cringe at the way you stutter, and the corners of his lips raise slightly at the flustered look on your face.
His hand comes up to your jaw, his thumb lightly brushing over your bottom lip. “Can I be your first?”
It’s no question that Matt has always found you attractive, even though he’s never voiced his thoughts to anyone about it. The problem is, he doesn't like most people and when it came to you, he just couldn’t swallow his pride enough to let his guard down. It turns out you two are extremely similar and it made you butt heads constantly. So, instead of letting himself let someone in for once, he chose to dislike you and it had always been easier that way.
But the way you look tonight, the infectious energy he’s getting from you now that he’s been alone with you for more than 5 minutes, it has him feeling something he’s never felt before.
Electric sparks crackle through you from his light touch on your lips and you almost open your mouth to taste him. But you’re still incredibly nervous. You haven’t had your first kiss yet, your first anything yet but all your thoughts can repeat is yes, yes, yes. Please be my first.
You nod and he leans over the middle console, his hand now firmly holding the side of your face, his fingertips sliding into your hair. Your heart threatens to go into cardiac arrest as he slowly presses his lips to yours, as if you might break like fine china.
But once your lips are connected, your nerves start to disappear and are replaced with feelings of excitement. They mold together almost perfectly, as he kisses your bottom lip and then your top one, his thumb stroking over your jaw. It feels incredibly sweet and tastes like sugar.
He pulls away slightly, his face still hovering over yours. You make eye contact and put your hands on his chest, your fingers grasping his shirt collar, afraid he might move away from you. “How’s that feel?” He breathes, his voice coming out in a rasp.
“Amazing...” You reply and he bites his bottom lip, his pants tightening from the look of pure want in your eyes. Before he can say anything, you kiss him again, this time with hunger and it feels like you’ve done it a million times before.
You expected your first kiss to be awkward, maybe even a little embarrassing. But this is nothing like that, your body heating and heart racing at the feeling of his wet, warm mouth against yours. He leads the kiss, both hands now on your face, his tongue sliding against yours.
It has your panties growing incredibly wet under your dress, and your breathing rapid as you grasp the tie around his neck, pulling it so he can get even closer than he already is. And then, he moans into your mouth and the sound has butterflies erupting inside you.
You decide you need more and push him back a little, disconnecting your lips. He starts to protest but then immediately stops when you climb over the middle and straddle him in the driver’s seat.
Luckily, the van is spacious and you’re not too uncomfortable as you sit on his lap, your dress riding up on your thighs. He places his hands on your hips as you kiss him again, gripping the silk harshly.
You can feel how hard he is under you, and he groans when you unknowingly grind against him, your body moving faster than your mind can think.
“Don’t do that.” He pants, catching his breath and stopping your hip movements. His eyes are closed, his eyebrows scrunched together as if he’s in pain. Your hands are on his broad shoulders, and they dip into his dress shirt through his loose collar, running your palms over his skin.
“What’s wrong? Does it hurt?” You ask and you move your hips again, this time a little slower. The feeling of his clothed dick against you has sparked a feeling of need in you that you’ve never felt.
He shakes his head, throwing it back against the headrest, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows hard. His grip slightly loosens on your hips but still tight on your dress as he allows you to grind down onto him. Your head falls into the crook of his neck as you let the pleasure of your movements take over.
He lets his eyes travel down to his crotch where there’s a large wet spot forming on his pants from your arousal. “Fuck…” He moans aloud and his dick throbs from the sight. He lifts your dress slightly and sees the outline of your lacy red underwear, his hands moving to grope your ass.
You’re panting against his neck and start to place soft kisses on his skin, eliciting more groaning from him. You reach your hand down to his belt, starting to unbuckle it.
“Y/N.” He says, stopping your hips firmly now. The tone in his voice makes you pull your head up and he’s trying to keep his resolve from completely slipping when he sees the way your eyes are blacked out in lust.
“I don’t want to do this if you’re not ready.” He says, searching your eyes for any hint of fear. He honestly didn’t expect an innocent kiss to turn into this.
You should’ve said no. You should’ve stopped it then and there, should’ve asked him to take you home.
Should’ve.
Could’ve.
Would’ve.
“Matt, I want this so bad right now. Please.” You whine, arousal clouding your mind and the feeling of your body on his is something you can’t refuse.
He gives in, his eyes on yours as he unbuckles his belt, and you lift slightly so he can pull his pants down just enough to the middle of his thighs. He guides you back down on him, this time so you sit around his left thigh.
You’re a little confused but he wraps his arms around your back, one of his hands tangling into the back of your hair as he holds you against him. “Just relax. Grind on me like you were doing earlier, baby. You were doing so good.” He instructs and the way he calls you baby has your heart fluttering in your chest.
He kisses you, and you do as he says, the feeling of his thigh tensing under you making your body heat with arousal again. You moan slightly, as you slide over him. He then pulls your panties to the side, so you’re bare against him, and the feeling has you both gasping.   
“Oh… my god.” You breathe, failing to kiss him back as you shamelessly moan his name. You feel a strong need inside you, and you let your body move against him fluidly, your wetness coating his thigh.
Matt knows what he’s doing. He knows it’s your first time and he wants you to be comfortable. Granted, the minivan might not be the classiest place, but he’s enjoying it if you are. He wants you to know what it feels like to have an orgasm all on your own (besides the help of his thigh) before he’s inside you. Before he absolutely ruins you.
You’re whimpering now, your hips picking up the pace as you chase a different kind of high. He feels incredible and you want to feel embarrassed at the way you’re getting off on his thigh right now but all you can think of is how good it feels.
“Fuck, you’re so wet..” he groans, his own eyes closing in pleasure at the way your pussy feels, slippery and warm on him.
“Matt…” You whine, and he presses his forehead to yours, his hands on your lower back, helping you ride him. “I know baby, let go. Its okay.” He says softly and the coil that’s been building for the past 20 minutes since he kissed you, finally releases and warmth floods your body. You moan loudly and feel yourself leaking on his thigh, your hips slowing down.
You’re out of breath as your movements stop, your heart still racing. “So good, baby. You did so good.” He whispers and you can see and feel how hard he is in his boxers, as your hands brush over him. He grabs your wrists before you can continue.
“Nuh uh.” He simply hums and lifts you up slightly. “Get in the back.”
The dominant tone in his voice causes butterflies again as you climb off him and into the back seat, laying down. He follows shortly after, unbuttoning his shirt so it’s completely open now and pulls his pants all the way off. He puts one arm above your head as he hovers over you, a dark look in his eyes.
His soft hand moves up your thigh, goosebumps erupting across your skin, and he pushes your dress up to your waist. Your red panties are stilled pulled to the side, the wetness from your previous orgasm coating you. He bites his lip, running his fingers through your folds. You gasp from the feeling, still a little sensitive from earlier.
“Let me know if you need me to stop, okay?” He says and you nod, gripping onto his bicep.
He spreads your legs a little further, your knees against his waist and pushes a single fingertip inside you, slowly easing his finger in. There’s a little discomfort at first but it’s quickly replaced with pleasure when he starts pumping it in and out of you. He adds another finger, and you whimper at the feeling, this being completely different from when you were riding his thigh.
“You okay?” he asks, continuing to slide his fingers in you. “God, yes.” You moan, closing your eyes to the feeling. He smirks at your response and the sound of your wetness has him buzzing with arousal. He’s been incredibly attentive to you and patient, and his boxers are suffocating his achingly hard cock.
Your hips start to buck, as you crave more, his fingers starting to hit a spongy spot in your walls, a slow fire spreading within you. He removes his fingers completely, pushing your hips down.
You pout at the loss of contact, and he chuckles, pulling himself out of his boxers. “Not yet, sweetheart. Be patient for me.” He says and your eyes travel down to where he spreads your arousal from his fingers on his cock, stroking a few times to coat it.
You heard he was big but had assumed they were just silly rumors. You were so wrong.
You continue to stare, and he guides himself to your entrance, his hand now forcing your head up to look at him. “Eyes up here, baby.” He says, a smug smirk on his face.
He places a hand on your waist, his other hand still against the window above you as he pushes the tip into you. It’s a little overwhelming, and you’re not sure how he’s even going to fit all of it in you, but his touch relaxes you as he rubs soothingly over your hip, going as slowly as he can.
He’s halfway in, the burning already starting to disappear as he soon eases all the way into you, and your eyes nearly roll to the back of your head as you clench around him, the feeling of him snug in your walls.
“So fucking tight…” He groans, his jaw clenched and squeezes a little harsher on your hip. He leans down closer to you, his arm coming to rest next to your head. He stays still inside you, letting you adjust.
“Matt.” You moan, your hands moving into his hair, tugging at the roots.
“Yes baby? You feel alright?” He checks.
“Yes. Please move.” You respond and he obeys your words gladly, pulling out almost all the way only to bury himself inside again. He makes slow, deep thrusts into you and the feeling has your head swimming, your thighs clenching around him, and your jaw dropped open slightly.
The feeling is indescribable, and he struggles to not cum inside you after only the first sixty seconds. That’s how good you feel around him, soaking wet and so tight.
The windows of the van are completely fogged, the air thick and hot. Your moans and whimpers are swallowed as he kisses you, his thrusts slowly picking up in pace. You both are speechless and there’s an unspoken realization between the two of you as your bodies move together in sync, your lips attached, breathing in each other’s air. The outside world has drifted away, the sweet bubble of pleasure and desire encasing you two.
“Matt.. I’m gonna cum again..” You warn, feeling the release build and build, your legs starting to shake.
“I know, Y/N. I want you to, please. Cum for me.” He responds and the movements of hips against yours are uneven now, his own release slowly crumbling. You cry out as you orgasm for the second time tonight, your walls clenching around him. He’s panting your name as he releases his seed into you at the same time, his fingertips leaving bruises on your hip.
“So fucking proud of you.” He murmurs, an exhausted smile on his face.
Mind shattering. Body numbing. Earth quaking, unforgettable sex. Nothing compared to it.
These are the memories flooding your mind as you sit on the leather couch, a cold drink in your hand, and your friend next to you, leaning over to talk into your ear over the loud music of the party. “No fucking way. Are you seeing what I’m seeing right now?” She says and you take a sip of your drink, nodding your head. “Yup.”
Matt stands at the other side of the large living room, laughing with Chris and Nick and a few other people. He hasn’t noticed you yet, but as you keep your eyes on him, it’s as if he can feel you staring. He turns his head in your direction and once he makes eye contact with you, his smile falls, and for a second, he almost looks upset, his eyes lingering on you.
And then he looks away, whispering something to Chris and walks off, towards the hallway.
Of course, he would run away as soon as he saw you. He’s pathetic.
In fact, you feel pathetic thinking you wouldn’t run into him here in Boston, his hometown. At a party one of your mutual friends is throwing no less. But still, you were hoping, no, praying that the one time you decide to leave your house and socialize, you wouldn’t see him.
And now your heart feels like it’s going to fall out of your ass, your head filled with old feelings you can’t escape. You hadn’t talked to Matt since that night, two years ago. You hadn’t even seen him since graduation. You avoided any video or clip of him that would come across your phone. You couldn’t bear to look at him.
You fucking hated Matthew Sturniolo. For many, many good reasons.
a/n: please dont come at me for making matt so mean in this one!! 😔 and if this flops ill be so sad lol i hope yall like it so far
taglist <3: (if you want to be added/taken off, reply to this post or comment on my masterlist. and if you weren't mentioned, it wouldnt let me tag u :/)
@sturniolopepsi @tillies33ssss @whicked-hazlatwhore @riasturns @christhopersturniolo @junnniiieee07 @sturnsjtop @seahorsie11 @inveigledvex @honestlyjb @mattslolita @certifiednatelover @glassesmattsbae @eryismum @sturncakez @sturnioloco @wh0resstuff @ribread03 @sturniololoco @75sturn
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