#obviously i don't go near ship stuff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lucabyte · 3 months ago

Note

i'm so curious about your character gender reads now tho 👀👀

(You enter the kitchen and see me, eating shredded cheese out of the fridge by the handful)

(I turn around to face you.)

Hi. Do you want me to sell you on amab NB Siffrin? I'm going to try and sell you on amab NB Siffrin. And maybe even a little bit of tranfem siffrin and/or loop. as a treat. just for you.

So, (I put the cheese back in the fridge.)

This read of mine comes from a number of things, a lot of them to do with the game's themes, and to do with Siffrin being a narrative foil to the other characters. And Vaugarde as a whole.

(READMORE WARNING: THIS IS LIKE 6K WORDS LONG. YOU ALL SHOULD KNOW BY NOW I DON'T MAKE POSTS WITHOUT UNCONSCIOUNABLE AMOUNTS OF EVIDENCE AND EXPLANATION. IF ANYTHING I'M BEING RESTRAINED HERE. THUMBS UP.)

(Pre-readmore note: this is in response to me having given an analysis of how I personally percieve Sifloop in relation to asexuality and shipping. Which you can look at here. (x))

It is however, not what my like, no-holds-barred no-rules just-for-me headcanon for Siffrin would be. (which is intersex 'head empty no thoughts' siffrin, for the record). This is instead my close-reading-of-the-text-and-themes interpretation of Siffrin. This is why I'm gonna be saying Read and not Headcanon, to distinguish the two. (Anything I consider a little bit too much of a stretch vis a vis interpretive hard reads I will call a headcanon. But those are for the last bit of this post.)

Unlike *gestures at mass media* All That… ISAT is already packed to the gills with queer rep, to the point where I feel no need to grasp at straws and make overextended reaches into obviously unintended subtext. Like with, y'know, most media. Since here, the subtext isn't unintended. Like this isn't a Transfem Metal Sonic or Aroace Ash Ketchum situation where I know none of the evidence is on purpose and I'm just having fun making a conspiracy theory pinboard out of it. This is like… There's intentionality there. And I want to engage with it on its level, see what the text itself suggests. It's my personal preferred method of expressing deep respect to a text. (Not that it has to be anyone else's, obviously. This is just my way of showing I love a work.)

So yeah, I am, in general, very interested in hearing hard-fought arguments when it comes to interpreting texts. I'm glad ISAT has a lot to pick at here, and so, I will. (and since not a lot of texts ever have anywhere near this kind of depth in this arena, i don't wanna squander it… i'll try and keep my own biases as in check as i can, and already have done by hashing quite a bit of this interpretation out with two people of very different gender identities to mine. To put it mildly, binary-aligned or transfem I am very squarely Not.)

(Now that the cheese bag has been removed from the equation, I drop this framing device, sit you down at the table and begin to dredge up evidence from below it.)

Okay, so. What are my like… Core reasonings here? I think I can split it into three categories. Broadly, with an amount of overlap, so bear with me…

SIFFRIN AS A FOIL AND CONTRAST TO MIRABELLE, ISABEAU AND THE CHANGE RELIGION AS A WHOLE.

SIFFRIN'S HABITS OF CLINGING TO 'KNOWN QUANTITIES', SCAPEGOATS, AND THEMES OF RACIAL IDENTITY INTERSECTING WITH GENDER IDENTITY.

SIFFRIN, LOOP, DE-PERSONING, DEHUMANISING, APATHY AND SURVIVAL.

Okay so up top I'm going to split my argument for Siffrin's gender identity Present and Future here. This means, for now, I'm arguing for AMAB NB Siffrin alone. The transfem stuff is for later (and more for loop, in my mind, too).

I have a few direct observations of the text here that set things up. Here are the things in-game that make me assume that Siffrin, as of the start of the game, has not yet undergone any radical change to their identity in their life. Not on purpose, at least. These are ordered in a messy but logical flow, so uh, try and keep up. I'll synthesise at the end. I Prommy.

SIFFRIN AS A FOIL AND CONTRAST TO MIRABELLE, ISABEAU AND THE CHANGE RELIGION AS A WHOLE.

CHANGE & THE UNIVERSE: PERCEIVED OPPOSITES

When interacting with most objects in the Changing Room in the house, they express a genuine curiosity toward body craft. It seems they are legitimately unfamiliar with it on a deeper level than having simply heard of it.

Despite this curiosity (explicitly stating they've previously wondered about it), they dismiss it as too much work early on in the game. These points combined seem to suggest to me that they have never previously sought out any kind of real change to their appearance or identity. Either for gender reasons, or other body dysmorphia reasons. (Which, despite the dismissal, they do refer to their body as a 'meat prison', which is not particularly positive) However...

This changes in Act 3. In acts 3 and 4 they flatly state: "You're thinking about crafting your body. You seem to have all the time in the world now." While still never spoken aloud, their declining mental state corrosponds with a worn-down, almost nihilistic reckoning with the feelings they masked with the 'meat prison' joke in act 2.

[Image: Interactions with the change craft textbook in acts 2 and 3/4.]

In talking to Mirabelle, they are very self assured that one can stay the same/be comfortable with their born identity. They also seem a little unsettled by the change religion's flippancy in general, which makes sense, as they have been clinging to the famliar (even when painful) to cope with other traumas. (More on this later, section 2)

The Universe Faith appears to heavily disincentivise Wanting for oneself and other expressions of Free Will due to safeguarding against Wish craft. This seems to have impacted Siffrin's mental state majorly, even if they do not recognise it. The followers of the faith are (if Siffrin is to be believed) incentivised to 'go with the flow' and take paths of least resistance, and those that DO make big decisions will tend to justify things as being The Universe's Will. (See: The King's entire Modus Operandi, and the way Loop (and Siffrin) do the same rote actions, constructing worldviews (the play analogy, the Universe's Will) and justify that as what the Universe Would Want (despite a total lack of evidence to prove as such)) As such, it seems as if a follower of this faith as neurotic as Siffrin would be unlikely to act upon any Wants to Change Themselves without a lot of turmoil and backwards-justification. (Of note, Loop's forcible change coinciding with a dropping of pronoun. But that is again for later, section 3) As of the start of the game, they do not appear to have broached this kind of turmoil directly.

[Image: Act 5 interaction with the star journal, emphasis on it being a cautionary tale against reckless usage of wish craft, instilled so deeply to be a children's bedtime story]

Siffrin, in act 5, grows frustrated with both The Universe and The Change God, feeling abandoned by the former. They struggle with simultaneously anthropomorphising the Universe as a cruel onlooker, while also seemingly acknowledging them as a cold, almost scientific fact of nature. This would heavily imply that the 'blame' put upon the Universe by Siffrin in these moments is known to them, at least a little, to be potentially meaningless. It seems that somewhere in Siffrin's belief system is something, be it the core or merely a creeping worry, that the Universe is not a thinking, feeling, thing. And thus that their invocations of "The Universe's Will" are merely rationalisations of random chance and consequence. This is in DIRECT contrast to the Change God, proven to be an emotive sapient entity, who merely refuses to offer a helping hand. (Similar sentiments are, too, spoken by the Change God itself.)

[Images: Interacting with the window in the observatory in act 5, text from the change god meeting]

So. These are the bulk of my observations when it comes to how Siffrin is positioned in contrast to the Change Belief. It would seem to be that Siffrin, inkeeping with their role as an outsider, is a complete fish out of water in Vaugarde's change-centric world. This makes sense! It makes them a compelling foil to the Vaugardians in our cast, and allows the Vaugardians to challenge Siffrin's worldviews merely by existing. It also, more importantly, makes Siffrin an interesting lens through which to inspect our two most Change-driven characters. Mirabelle and Isabeau.

MIRABELLE.

Mirabelle and Siffrin's differing faiths are put on display the most frequently. Interactions like the circle key and the party's disbelief of Siffrin's facts about the stars make this clear. These interactions other Siffrin from the group further, and are another avenue through which Siffrin can ignore their own needs, not communicating with the party and allowing them to dismiss things he deems important.

Obviously, the friendquest is primarily about Mirabelle's struggle with her aromanticism and asexuality. But there's an implicit undercurrent of gender there too. Mirabelle has never made a big change, not like Isabeau. She has never 'changed completely', by her words. And Siffrin distinctly finds this an odd thing to be worried by. Whatever culture he carries has no pressure to explore these avenues, it seems. Siffrin is able to help her by sharing their honest opinions, that he's never felt the need to change these things, and he's happy (allegedly). Why should she?

[Image: Mirabelle's friendquest text] Siffrin is not thinking particularly hard when he first does the friendquests, they are just being themselves. By positioning Siffrin as this unchanged yet confident object, they are in the perfect position to help Mirabelle by being in her almost exact position, both sexuality and transgender status (albeit, with the caveats of potential alloromanticism, and a they pronoun), that they become her ideal foil. (And in fact, the subtle differences between their positions in canon add to this, showing a display of Perceived Genuine Truth, rather than simple in-group camaraderie)

Whereas…

ISABEAU.

When Mal du pays speaks as Isabeau, it says the following;

"I don't want to know someone who won't even try to change, who luxuriates in things staying the exact same like you do."

I don't want to know someone - Shame of being known, that's Isabeau's insecurity. Reflected back at Siffrin, who has become the worst thing imaginable to each of their friends, in Siffrin's own mind. He absorbs their insecurities like a sponge and incorporates them into himself. Empathy turned ill.

Who luxuriates in things staying the exact same - Now THAT'S interesting. This is not Isabeau's insecurity, it's Siffrin's own. But also, it appears as if, Siffrin, whom to Mirabelle was unflappable in that not changing was alright, has internalised some of her worry. That it is MDP's Isabeau saying this, though, shows this is about Personal Change, perhaps even Specifically Gender and Self Image, rather than Mirabelle's spiritual side.

Isabeau and his distinct change in personality and gender, to become someone who he actually likes… Diametric to Siffrin, who has been stagnant for a long time, presumably as far as they can remember. It would seem to imply they have no recourse against this argument. Siffin becomes, in his mind, the opposite to Isabeau, a man he deeply admires the bravery of when told the story of his Change. These are Siffrin's words against themselves, that they consider themselves to have never even 'tried' whatever it is they think Change to be.

So. These are my main points vis a vis: Siffrin as a foil. This reading would posit that Siffrin's He/They status is, well, almost accidental? Which I would imagine befitting of them. They are, at the start of the game, still the mysterious rogue who never elaborates upon anything. They aren't going to be correcting a they/them from a teammate who is likely far more cautious about assumptions.

Notably, Mirabelle excludes Siffrin from the label "man" in the bathroom monologues… But as does Siffrin when in the prologue poem room. Though one needs remember, Siffrin only expresses these thoughts internally.

[Image: Bathroom conversation featuring Isabeau identified as the party's singular man]

[Image: Prologue!Siffrin expressing that they are not a man in very certain terms.]

While I do wonder what Mirabelle's knowledge (or lack thereof, potentially! Did Siffrin actually divulge this to her, once? Or is she making assumptions again?) is here, this is pretty clear evidence that Siffrin doesn't see themselves As A Man. (that, and Adrienne's word of god "fella" comments). I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this… but.

The thesis here is, that Siffrin may want to explore their gender further; doesn't feel connected to Masculinity, and yet, keeps that He pronoun around? Well, the Universe does not, in Siffrin's mind, really allow for personal wants and desires. If their friends start they/themming them, then cool. They like it, but never requested it, so it's the Universe's will. But, asking? Making decisions and requests and rocking the boat? That seems to scare Siffrin a lot. It seems to scare them so much it causes a lot of, if not all of, the conflict in the game. I feel like it's a fair deduction that this aversion to humour their own desires pervades a lot of their existence.

Plus, I think there's meat there. By only allowing Siffrin to reckon with any potential desires to change only after growing closer with the family, you get to explore things like "How does Mirabelle feel that even the person who said she didn't have to change is changing." and the slightly less potentially harrowing (OR MORE, IF YOU WANT IT TO BE? IDK. I'M NOT YOUR BOSS.) "Isa's continued changing allows Siffrin a space to explore it, maybe even just by proxy, or maybe by joining them."

But mostly, this section is about how Siffrin not having Changed Yet makes them delightfully strong narratively; allowing them to relate to Mirabelle, and get cold feet when comparing themselves to Isabeau. I love this as a narrative strengthener. It's very rare in media that we get to explore a nonbinary character's thoughts and insecurities on whether or not they're "doing enough" to be nonbinary. Even less so Aligned nonbinary people. And reading that alignment and insecurity through the lens of a nonbinary person not fully disconnected from their assigned gender at birth? It's a very compelling exploration of a very common and raw and yet underdiscussed feeling, much like the rest of ISAT. I think this is an extremely potent element should it be read this way, and is only strengthened when taking Siffrin's other themes into account.

Speaking of which.

2. SIFFRIN'S HABITS OF CLINGING TO 'KNOWN QUANTITIES', SCAPEGOATS, AND THEMES OF RACIAL IDENTITY INTERSECTING WITH GENDER IDENTITY.

HOLDING ON TO WHAT YOU KNOW. (OR KNOW THAT YOU DO NOT.)

I explained above many of my thoughts on the Universe Faith, and trying to keep these two sections separate was difficult, but needed to be done for the sake of clarity. But this section and the above are deeply intertwined.

Siffrin… Holds on to the things they know. They do not know much. But man do they fucking hold. And yet, paradoxically, they are also avoidant about it.

It is made clear in the text, to the point where I really don't feel the need to rehash it here, that Siffrin's disconnection from their homeland is incredibly painful, but that they consider that culture utterly and irreplaceably important to them. They cannot face it, it is too painful. They cannot let it go, it is too important.

Knowing what we know of the Island's irl inspirations (though, word of god, the exact location is not supposed to matter, one can infer it from the text (and I did! within reasonable proximity!)), Siffrin is of an indigenous peoples of some description, more than likely. And at the very least, Siffrin carries with them inherent biases and ignorances that show that Vaugarde's conceptions of things don't quite mesh with their own. Bowing to the Vaugardian way of things could very easily be seen as assimilation, in this way.*

And identity? Gender? Presentation? Role? All of that has a cultural element. There's no telling what specifics Siffrin has lost in that arena, and that's the problem. Neither do they. How paralysing, the feeling, to know that should you change yourself you risk unknowingly erasing another piece of home? I wouldn't blame them for locking it off. Keeping their old clothes, keeping what little they can remember of themselves… It doesn't seem to me a conducive or safe mental space to get experimental.

And the Universe makes for a perfect scapegoat. As referenced in the section above, a lot can be justified should you call it "The Universe's Will", because who's there to call you on it? Hardly anyone. Your divine right to Freeze A Place In Time; Your Deserved Punishment for Wanting to be Loved: All of it the Universe-- If you want it to be. And thusly, if the Universe wanted you to be a certain way, wouldn't you already be? Wouldn't it make you so? (Wouldn't it take away your body, that which makes you human? If that is what it thought of you?) So best to put it out of your mind. Wouldn't want to accidentally wish anything.

But as the game itself puts it, personified by The King, you cannot stay mired like this forever. As Loop themselves puts it, they can "get so fixated, sometimes." At some point they need to allow themselves to grow in whatever direction they need, because in the end, they need to live their life. They don't need to abandon their country, their culture, but they can't let it restrain them either.

(* MASSIVE CAVEAT: im white as fuck boyyy. i cant say shit. im like technically Of The Land im like 90% pictish or something ridiculous like that so my particular line has never moved anywhere but. this is notttt something i have input or insight on. this is all gleaned from reading and listening to indiginous perspectives from wherever they may be. i am simply trying to infer from what the game gives us without inserting my own feelings on the matter.)

3. SIFFRIN, LOOP, DE-PERSONING, DEHUMANISING, APATHY AND SURVIVAL.

Alright, here's some less heady and purely-thematic points to round things out. And where we'll also address the fucked up star being in the room; Loop.

My last couple of reading points are the most potentially-transfem to me. Or at least the ones that really hammer home, to me, a seeming lack of want to be masculine-aligned.

ANOTHER NOTE ON THE 'NOT A GUY' THING.

Obviously, there is the aforementioned "Not a man/not that you're a boy" thing. This is rather straightforward, but also still pretty ambiguous. You can be masc-aligned and still Not A Guy. But it does seem to be of note that being a guy very much does not seem to be a goal of Siffrin's. I would posit this in direct contrast to… Isabeau.

But not Isabeau's masculinity. I would instead hold it up against Isa's femininity.

ISAT, as a text, has its characters have genuinely different levels of security in their gender identity, and Isabeau, despite still having insecurities, seems super chill on the gender angle specifically! Their internal strife comes not from their 'not feeling like a man enough' or 'hating being a woman', but instead from their self perception as a friendless nerd! Something that seems to be only tangentially related to Isa's gender, really?

The big dumb bruiser thing is certainly aided by being a dude, but Isa still seems completely comfortable referring to themselves with feminine language, calling himself a "mother hen" (prologue) and having "the heart of a fair maiden" (cookie snack time). (However, they also take being excluded from Mira's girly book club as a surprised compliment, implying they weren't expected to be excluded, and find it affirming.) And even further so, Isa states they want to continue changing further and exploring their identity more, being rather blatant that they might lean back into femininity (and more importantly, let themselves be outwardly smart again), since they're starting to feel hurt by everyone assuming they ARE genuinely stupid.

[Image: Prologue Isa calling himself a mother hen]

And man, this is such a breath of fresh air vis a vis representation. I don't think I really need to explain that. A character who's gender identity is driven by chasing euphoria, even if it started out by trying to drive out misery. Isabeau's character is so damn good. But this essay isn't about him, so get back in the crate, boy.

... So here we have Isa, who is genuinely comfortable reclaiming things about their birth gender, and Mirabelle who loves her traditionally feminine traits to the point where she feels a little guilty that she isn't rejecting them to foster change. And then we have Siffrin… who seems to reject masculine language…? Hrm… (… And then we have The King. A Masculine Title. Someone who Siffrin increasingly sees themselves in and deeply, deeply dislikes this.)

APATHY AND SURVIVAL

It should be clear by now that I see Siffrin's core character as being driven by avoidance and survival. This seems to lead to a lot of apathy, brushing off emotions that are too intense or events and occurences that are too painful. (See: just absolutely everything with Bonnie)

It's all Siffrin really seems to be able to do to Survive. They've travelled, seemingly alone, for what would be around a decade by what the game says about the island's disappearance. They've lived alone on the road as a traveller in a country that so openly welcomes strangers that THE KING and his whole motives can happen. Siffrin is avoidant and refuses to acknowledge problems or strive for help and comfort.

So. That line about the dress. Let's unpack the line(s) about the dress.

THE DRESS LINE, AND THE WAY IT CHANGES BETWEEN PROLOGUE, ACT 2, AND ACT 3.

Good god where to start with this. Full disclosure, the first draft here was way more vague in how I approached this line because I remembered it (and another line, I'll get to it.) way more tame, but going and getting the screenshots..... Siffrin. Buddy. We gotta unpack this.

In act 2, we have "You haven't worn a dress in forever!". This is a neutral, if seemingly a little joyous statement. All we really glean from this is the information that Siffrin at some point, wore 'a' dress. No real inferences there. (Maybe you could say that the singular as opposed to plural makes it more likely that they borrowed/only owned One Dress rather than owned several? But that's a massive stretch...)

Then, act 3/4 shuffles this off into a more general "You wonder if you'll ever wear different clothes again." Which is a more despairing and distant statement. Considering Siffrin seems to travel with only the items they can carry, and owns sleep clothes... It's unclear how many changes of clothing they have. The party seems to consider the cloak a pretty permanent fixture, anyhow. But this line doesn't really say much aside from 'oh god i'm losing myself to the time loop malaise'

NOW THE PROLOGUE. Prologue Sif, buddy, pal, Loop, if I'm allowed to call you that....

Thousands of loops in. We are wistful for specifically dresses. You've forgotten almost everything. You dream about someday seeing the sun again. To be anywhere but here. You want to wear a dress again.

I. Kind of do not know what to do here but point at it. Like I said, my first draft had me half-remembering the progression of this line and as such I was far more vague on what I thought it could imply. Instead this is just straight up yearning.

To, try and segue back to what I had initially written, we'll pick up here...

Siffrin expresses a want to wear other clothes, explore changing their body... But instead, they wear a ratty old form-covering cloak that keeps them warm and safe and is a last reminder of home. They are shapeless, formless, hiding their face under the brim of a wide hat. They do not voice their desire to wear a dress aloud. They once again, keep a desire to themselves, because they do not allow themselves to want publicly. Apathy is safer. Apathy and quiet means you do not risk retribution or hurt.

While I do not think the above is exclusively a transfeminine feeling, it really, really reads like one when taken part and parcel with assuming Siffrin has denied themselves prior exploration.

... And here I have to break my first draft again. I was being, once again, restrained in my reading when writing this. Because I had convinced myself I had maybe straight up imagined one of the lines I was basing my reads on, because I couldn't find it. Because it was a line that read so strikingly desolate to me that my brain had slotted it in during Act Five, meaning when I went looking for it neither me nor my friends could find it.

It's in acts 3 and 4. It's a line I already brought up.

"You're thinking about crafting your body. You seem to have all the time in the world now."

good fucking christ. sorry to break the academic tone but Jimminy Fucking Willikers, Siffrin. What's with that bit. The resignation and despair and guilty comfort we know the timeloop brings them, bleeding into the gender.

This. *taps my finger harshly on my desk* THIS, this feels transfem. this feels so wildly transfem to me. The knowledge that they've never changed before this line lends. The admission that they've been holding back because it's 'too much work'. I spent a lot of time during the game relating Siffrin not to myself but to my friends.

If I'm honest, really, truly, I'm not all too often in Siffrin's shoes. I'm the stable one, of my group. I'm the rock people ground themselves on. And I see so much hesitance, all the time. Denial of joy because what if it's taken away, again? Or futilely out of reach? It hurts more to try, and to fail, than to never try at all.

I wanted to shake Siffrin by the shoulders this whole game. Grit teeth beg them to accept help because for fuck's sake people are clearly offering it get it through your skull--

*coughs* Ah. Ahem. Right. The uh, academic tone.

Right. What I mean to say is, this read as transfem to me because of the way it relates to real-world experiences of denial. And this combo of the Dress line, and the progression of the Meat Prison line, the constant evidence of never having strived for what they want, and that insistance that you're not a man, seem to dislike being percieved as a man, but not being able to shed the outward signifiers?

Individually, yes, these points can be read in different ways. The total opposite ways, even, I'm sure! But as a gestalt it feels really, really transfem. Even if yeah, sure Vaugarde is a magical setting where being transgender is accepted, and this hesitance, specifically, around gender, might not 'make sense' in 'the lore'...

Diegesis isn't everything. Sometimes something that reflects a real-world feeling is important, even if it doesn't 'mesh' with 'the lore' of the world.

TANGENT: DIEGESIS AND READING INTO NON-REAL-WORLD-SETTINGS.

This is a Watsonian vs Doylist spectre that's been haunting this whole argument. In-universe (Watsonian), Vaugarde has seemingly no discrimination between genders, sexualities, and a lackadaisical approach to most things in the arena. Reading our own patriarchal/heterosexual/amanonormative/perisexist society unto it does not make sense, not in this context.

In the real world, however (Doylist), ISAT is a text made in our prejudiced society. A text that is distinctly flavoured by those bigotries which it is kicking back against. Because of this, it is not the whole story to simply read the text while discarding our real-world-informed inferences. Isabeau is a big example of this. While perfectly accepted in Vaugarde, he is very obviously a revolutionary character in our real-world space! He has so much to say, specifically BECAUSE things about him that are not readily accepted here, are accepted there! Same with Mira's struggles, and yes, Siffrin's too.

ISAT was written with the knowledge of how it would play against our real world in mind, we know this, clearly, from many an interview. This is most present in how it engages with asexuality and aromanticism (and immigrant identity), but make no mistake, it influences the Whole Text.

Ergo, just because I view certain writing choices here in the context of Our Real World Perspectives On Gender and not Vaugarde's In-Universe Perspectives, it does not make them an invalid read. They are simply a Doylist read.

There's been an admittedly loosey-goosey lack of delineation here between things I'm reading with either lens, because for the most part all of these points have been a vague synthesis of both that I can't quite decouple. Unprofessional, I know, but I'll admit to not having written my thoughts down like this in a good long while. Usually I just hash this out verbally over discord voice to a small number of weirdo literature and classics student friends who are willing to humour me. I'm an arts student too, but animation hardly required I actually write an essay to a literature degree's standard. Lol.

DE-PERSONING. AND LOOP. OH JESUS . LOOP .

Siffrin de-persons themselves a lot. I say de-person rather than dehumanise because, well, there's a subtle difference there. Siffrin doesn't see themselves as vermin or an animal or an object, but they do seem to see themselves as lesser, not requiring the respect they grant others. They aren't, you know, a 'real person'.

People get to have things like thoughts and wants and identities. Siffrin is, at best, Just Siffrin. They have what they have and they don't ask for more and they don't (CAN'T) feel too strongly on what they do have!

When Loop at first offers their pronouns they offer the Royal 'We'. This is at least a little bit, a joke. A nudge toward their true identity, a potential dig at themselves for becoming so understanding of The King. Mostly though, a joke on the first thing…. and a sign that they do not see themselves as a separate entity to the Siffrin stood before them.

When Siffrin rejects this, they settle for they/them. Loop drops the he/him, presumably partially to cover their tracks, but… They just showed their hand with the 'Royal We', and if you wanted to go even further with this, there's no way for us to know whether Loop is treating this pronoun as singular or not. They presumably are, but it is still a potentially plural pronoun.

Loop… Clearly does not see themselves as a person. It's, I would say, a completely reasonable assumption that the form they have taken reflects implicit feelings toward themselves as less than a person, an actor, a monster, a tool, a means to an end. They are rendered inhuman by The Universe, frivolous distractions removed. No mouth, inventory and clothes confiscated, nothing between the legs. Formed roughly in the shape of a person to allow them to do their only job: Help.

Loop's body does not make logical sense, given their continued ability to sleep, dream and their continued habit of deep breaths to self-soothe. It would seem to me, it was made in the image it was, with only the tools it needed to Help Siffrin. Why obfuscate their identity? Because giving the game away too early would likely make them lose hope. Why so deeply, thoroughly star themed? An instant signal, that even if a stranger, they are an ally. They are home.

[Image: Loop saying that they take naps and dream, and evidence of Loop habitually attempting to breathe in the twohats lose-to-loop ending]

And they… Degender themselves. No longer with any bodily signifiers of masculinity, and cruelly disallowed the ability to hide themselves beneath fabric, they are null. The spoiler Q&A (paratext, as it were) states that:

Q. Is Loop: 1. Actually comfortable with both he and they, but only gave the one pronoun to emphasize the distance? 2. Only using they/them because a large life event led to a shift in identity/ how they’d like to be perceived? or 3. time lops stole he from they they :( A. Mostly that first one. But all three of those reasons have a bit of truth to them.

While the 'mostly the first one' comment does imply that Loop would not baulk at being he/him'd (similar to how Siffrin does not), the other reasons, especially the second, having 'a bit of truth' does lend credence to this reading. That Loop's self-perception has shifted, and what I posit, is that this shift is in tandem with a disconnection with humanity. Due, presumably, to the dehumanising experience of the timeloop.

Loop has no biology to speak of, and yet they remain blind in one eye. I take this as an implication that they considered this so core to themselves, to who they could remember being, that it stayed. Even if they had forgotten their own face, trapped in a part of the house with no mirrors, they knew they couldn't see. They kept this, and yet seemingly they, or The Universe, or both of them in tandem, discarded all else.

This isn't like…. Healthy behaviour. That is for certain. But it is interesting that Siffrin and Loop seem to hold on to their masculinity by a thread, and that Loop, when actually given the excuse to make a choice, chooses the Neutral Option. Siffrin might de-person themselves, but Loop, Loop is absolutely dehumanising themselves. From Loop's own mouth (or lack thereof) do they call themselves a Corpse. That's… pretty damn bad.

TANGENT 2: POTENTIAL IMPLICATIONS OF THE JAPANESE TRANSLATION.

Did somebody say 'distance'? Yeah turns out that has some more potential evidence. In the form of First Person Pronouns. See, English, with its third person only pronouns relies on others to gender you. Japanese, you get to gender yourself. And Siffrin specifically has an interesting discrepancy in the way he refers to himself.

(DISCLAIMER: I . DO NOT KNOW MUCH ABOUT JAPANESE. THIS IS SECOND-HAND KNOWLEDGE. SOURCED FROM THIS TUMBLR POST AND OTHER QUICK SKIMS OF WIKIPEDIA)

Loop and Siffrin use the same, very neutral "mostly male but could go either way" pronoun of 僕 boku. Safe, soft friendly pronoun. Used by people on the younger side of adulthood, not so impolite that you can't use it in a formal setting. Such a neutral all-rounder that female singers in japan tend to use boku in their songs to relate to the audience with quiet confidence.

And in their internal monologue? Siffrin uses a completely different pronoun. In his head, for himself, he uses 自分 jibun. Now, this may be an artefact of the monologue's english second-person "You", since jibun can also be used to mean a very neutral "self". A "myself/herself/himself" type 'self'. But when used as a first person pronoun, it has a connotation of being… distant, introspective. Which is… a fascinating implication, if that was the intent.

But I don't know anything about japanese so ! If I'm off the mark, discard this!

LOOP, PART 2: MAYBE NOT A GREAT STATE TO BE IN.

While Siffrin I can comfortably argue that they can like, keep their current gender presentation, whatever you may perceive it to be, once the game is over, Loop, I cannot.

Siffrin's potential issues with their identity are ones that honestly feel like they would best be explored with gentle refinement and searching. They don't need to violently seperate themselves from what they are now, far from it, in fact. They need to learn to grow comfortable in their own skin, and with the people they love. To become open and trusting, with an open mind to where it may lead.

Loop has already lost this battle. They don't get to refine anymore, just pick up the pieces. While I don't necessarily think radical change is Good for Loop, I think they may Need It. For them, resting will probably become stagnation (see: napping all day under the tree, resigned, really, to the idea they're stuck there forever.), they need a shake-up in order to re-find their feet. Even if they end up right back where they started, they still need to do the actual painful process of soul-searching first.

Problem is, they're still rather avoidant. So it basically becomes a question of getting them into a situation where this exploration is forced upon them. At which point, that's a whole new plotline. This becomes fanfiction. Hence, why while I think Transfem-Egg Loop is a Valid Read when extrapolated from Siffrin… I must concede any actual adventures into them acting upon that as headcanon territory. I just do not know how you would get them there without making a whole new Thing, at which point it stops being Just A Read of the text haha. It doesn't help that Loop and Siffrin (grudgekeepers supreme) both have reason to spite the Change God after who was phone.

As for whether this egg-read reflects directly back on to Siffrin? Maybe! They are the same person. But I think that, especially with Vaugarde's lax views, and their actual differences (Loop's general worse mania // Siffrin's incentive to stay a reminder to themselves and Loop of their country) means they could easily go two different routes, along the road to becoming their own distinct individuals. (And in all honesty, growing into their differences is probably the more healthy option in the long run if you're keeping Loop around? But again, we are going so far into the future here this is no longer a read. And I am not here to dispense baseless headcanons without massive disclaimer, so…)

Tl;Dr:

Siffrin's Survival-Apathy and hesitance to change feels really thematic to their being 'what's left' of their homeland

They seem unsettled by the flippancy of the Change Religion at times, clinging to the familiar to cope with the trauma of displacement.

Mal du pays speaks of them that they have not 'tried' to change, showing an insecurity there, even outside of the literal stagnance of the loops.

They are self assured to Mira that one does not have to change, in a very genuinely personal impulsive statement.

They and others exclude themselves from being "A Man", but Siffrin keeps desires to explore their expression to themselves.

The Universe belief, seemingly in Siffrin's view of it, disincentivises Free Will and Wants very heavily. It is not hard to assume they extend this to all elements of their life.

They have self-admittedly never pursued tangible change, likely due to this aversion to choice. Despite this, they express interest in changing, seeming nonplussed with their body, and house at least some desire for more traditionally feminine expression.

Oh Good God. Loop Sure Does Not Treat Themselves Like A Person. Why Does That Come With A Pronoun Change? What Does That Mean?

But most of all:

It makes them such a fascinating foil and lens to Change and characters who believe in it! It makes them eerily similar to The King! It opens up such fascinating debate between characters like themselves and Mirabelle, Isabeau and Loop, on whether or not they want to change in future, or if it truly is okay to never radically change yourself! What genuinely fertile ground for dialogues. And man if I'm not heavily drawn towards dialogues.

(End of essay! Congratulations for making it the whole way! 🎉 I hope this nightmarish deep dive helps with understanding some of the ways I've been writing Siffrin and Loop too. Since while I've not ever focused on the gender side of it (and probably won't in comic form) this does pervade my view of the two, since it would be impossible for it to Not. As you can see, I do think it is pretty relevant to both their themes.)

(Now for some bonus material)

ADDENDUMS:

PERSONAL BIAS NOTE:

Not included in this analysis since this is more a Pet Theme of my own (usually kept quarantined to the realms of my OCs), but something else I see in Siffrin is a reflection of the Dude Issue(tm) of patriarchal irl society disincentivisng Dudes(tm) from ever fucking introspecting ever.

I'm curious about nonbinary/trans characters who have no idea they’re nonbinary/trans because they’ve been disincentivised from thinking/doubting their identity due to societal power structures or simply tradition. I dig around the themes of “a lot of guys are trapped in a societal prison without ever knowing and it makes them miserable but they can’t escape because they don’t even see the cage” like, a lot, in my personal work. It intrigues me. So bleh, cards on the table there. That mode of interacting with nb/trans characters is one I'm inclined to.

This kinda goes hand in hand with the watsonian vs doylist situation i took an aside to mention. But it is so far along the doylist side that I didn't want to include it, since it is a little too assumptive of the text for my comfort. I don't think the game necessarily has much commentary on this specific Societal Bind. But if it does, then hey, there's my thoughts on it.

STRAY SIDE NOTES AND HEADCANONS ABOUT OTHER CHARACTERS (AS A TREAT FOR GETTING THIS FAR):

MID-GAME OBSERVATION ABOUT BONNIE AND ODILE THAT I NEVER WENT BACK TO VERIFY:

I got the impression that Bonnie heavily favours they/them pronouns for Siffrin, and Odile he/him, as a bit of presumed character voice. I don't know that I am right, literally at all, in that observation, because it very well could've been confirmation bias.

BUT! It did give me the impression that one of the things Bonnie was idolising about Siffrin was a degree of "wow!! older person with my gender!! wow!!", which is just like, cute. I like it even if I don't have any solid evidence.

ODILE, WHAT'S HER DEAL?:

Oh she stays just as mysterious as she intends to be, huh? Even with her comments in the Changing Room alluding to knowing things about underground changing operations, you can't draw much of a conclusion about her. I appreciate verily that she's word-of-god unlabelled and also poly. That shit's great. Woman who has stopped drawing lines or caring what she's up against. Nice characterisation flavour I think.

Anyway, I do think that transfem Odile is a really, really nice take. I have no evidence in either direction for her in either direction, and her being a woman of any description makes her relationship with her absent mother something interesting to chew on, but the idea that she pursued womanhood intentionally lends an interesting texture. I've not much to say, but it's a thread to pull on. Makes you wonder what other female role models she had in her life instead. Anyway she's mysterious as fuck I can't extrapolate Jack nor Squat. Shrug! I'm also made curious by the idea of her potentially moving away from womanhood as she feels the weight of her history lifted. This goes either way, really. Diagnosis: mysterious.

HEADCANON NOTE: INTERSEX SIFFRIN

I don't have any in-text support for this so this entire thing is an unbased headcanon to me. but i DO like it because 1. fun and 2. potential for more thematic exploration

haha gotcha its fuckin themes again. its always themes with me.

But yeah. Not much to say here besides drawing a parallel (that I believe I've seen drawn elsewhere in the fandom already?) between ISAT's comments on how a society that values change would view Aroace identities, and how Mira feels about not wanting to change with the real world experiences of Intersex people having alteration and conformity forced upon them, saying the Change Belief would likely be just as bad for them as it is for aroace people.

So, adding it to Siffrin's situation further drags them into the opposition-to-change foil role. Which like I said, think has a lot to explore.

HEADCANON NOTE: A POTENTIAL METHOD FOR GETTING LOOP OUT OF THEIR GOD DAMNED COMFORT ZONE

I think utilising Loop's contrarianism is an effective and funny way to get them to explore their gender. I personally think running with them trying to hide their identity from the party is a hilarious way to do it. Having them try to position themselves in direct opposition to Siffrin to "throw the party off their trail" (not that i think they really need to?), going full feminine-revealing-clothing because it's NOT what a Siffrin would do and accidentally growing accustomed to it. Funny to me. Especially when the party eventually do find out who they are and go . "????? what was the girl stuff about ??? is that something you wanna do now ???".

[Isabeau] "Ohhhh it was a bit! Haha you really are Sif, still a jokester!" [Loop] "HAHA YEAH . JOKES. LOVE THOSE. LOVE TO MAKE JOKES!" [Isabeau] "Yep! Anyway. Tell me if you need anything!"

Bonus bonus:

[Siffrin] "Okay, so, if you're a girl. Does this reflect on like… me?" [Loop] "No doubles. Get your own gender, parasite~!"

#oh my god this is like 6k words what happened. well you can't say my claims are unsubstantiated i guess.#lucabytetalks #fuck dude i sure do !!!!#i have to assume a lot of other people picked up on exactly what i did too but i dont read other peoples meta very often so !!#i am simply shaking hands with anyone else who came to this conclusion. hi. sometimes its just fun to construct a small essay i guess #i have like no goal putting this out here other than like. For The Sport of Writing Out Media Analysis. so if it makes anything click #in peoples minds or actually sells them on this reading then that's just a bonus i suppose #in stars and time #isat analysis #isat meta #isat siffrin #isat loop #isat spoilers #2hats spoilers #lucabytewrites #welp. no idea what else to tag this. be free and into the wild my gigantic ass post.#is some of this redundant? probably! but cmon man its a tumblr essay i can't format it perfectly. sometimes points get repeated #anyway this post is lagging out my tumblr drafts now i have to post it oh god oh christ i hope nothing goes wrong #edit: i forgot i made the lucabytewrites tag a while back for purrgatorio this can go in there too

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signedaiko · 24 days ago

Note

Can we get the Scavengers with a gn human reader from your AU? The one where you're a liaison for Earth?

Thanks!

Scavengers x Reader [MTMTE]

In which you've been adopted into the Scavenger crew and have to find ways to survive with their minimal supplies.

The first few weeks with them were the easiest in terms of supplies because you'd yet to run out of rations

Years of training to take off into space prepared you; you had seeds, artificial lights, heat lamps, and a water filter that could serve up to twenty people at once

Until Misfire stepped on it

They do their best to fix it, and you had all the training to make it from scratch

Except it was completely condensed and you'd have to find all the materials to build it again, an unforseen consequence

Thankfully, you can make stops at popular organic planets, which all carry water to stock up, but it's still a setback

The first to accept you is Crankcase, who has gone through similar training to you and whom you can bond with regarding flight training

Hes content to have you in the cockpit with him and shows you around steering a ship

Having you certainly beats autopilot when he has to step away

Misfire and Krok are next; they don't really care enough to push you away, especially since you scored them a huge deal that let them repair the WAP

Misfire is in charge of keeping you stocked on water and helping you locate materials to make a new filter

Hes also in charge of paying for it

Krok is more non chalant

He doesn't owe you anything, you owe him nothing

But he might get fussy if you contest his leadership

YES he CAN tell you're disagreeing just to upset him and it pisses him off

Spinister is iffy about you, humans are weird and small and he doesn't get your intentions at all

Why would a human want to be in space with them? It must have been for nefarious reasons

Even so, he forgets his issues pretty fast when you join in for their games, and shows a lot more self-restraint, seeing as he could easily overpower you if you tried to hurt him

Which, obviously you were planning on doing and he had to prepare for, duh

Fulcrum takes the longest for...obvious reasons

Humans could never do it for him, never ever ever ever

He never gets comfortable touching you or going near any of your stuff, but he does fund you quite funny and slowly eases into being around you

You might notice his optics go offline whenever he 'looks' at you

Offensive, but, you get it

If it keeps him from gagging, then whatever

Author's Note - I love the scavengers, you'll have to deal with me over writing for them.

#aiko writez #transformers #mtmte #idw #headcanons #transformers x reader #mtmte x reader #maccadam #scavengers x reader #mtmte scavengers

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nev-valkyriesdottir · 1 year ago

Text

When will I see you again ∥ Carol Danvers x reader part 1

Summary - Carol didn't knew that loving someone would be so hard.

The way you met Carol was totally out of the ordinary.

It was on a fall afternoon, you were having a cup of tea, sitting on your doorstep admiring the nature around your lonely house when you saw a bright light arriving right toward the forest near by. Then the light crashed throught the tall trees and you heard a huge 'boom' causing your eyes to widen. You rushed back into your house to grab a gun then make your way to the forest and stalked carefully toward the place were the unknow light crashed.

Once you arrived there the view in front of you shocked you. It a space ship, probably broken and it looked pretty bad. You walked around the ship carefully, your gun still held up as you started to look around curiously. Obviously it wasn't the first time you heard that. As an ancient Black Widow in the astral scientist departement who escaped, you were used to see this kind of stuff. But this one looked so much better than the other you've seen before.

You awwed and lowered your gun a little and reached out to touch the spaceship when you felt a presence behind you. Turning around quickly, you pointed your gun toward a blond woman who stood in a perfect fighting stance.

"Who are you ?" You both asked at the same time and a smirk emerged on her face while you stayed neutral.

"You came on my land, crashing a space ship with a system worth of 2050 that can only be found in Tony Stark's tower or SWORD, I deserve explaination more than you do." You growled and the blond beauty lowered her fighting stance.

"I'm sorry I didn't knew the land were taken. Last time I came here no one lived here and I needed an emergency landing. I'm Carol Danvers by the way." She introduced and you stayed still.

"Are you going to lower your gun ?" She asked and you hesitated before lowering your gun a glare still on your face.

"Come with me." You simply answered and walked back toward your house.

That night you and Carol contacted her space base. Turns oit she was stuck for atleast a couple of months before anyone would come. And considering the damage on her ship, it would still take a few couple of months to be fixed.

So you being you, you offered her to sleep in your guest room for the main time claiming and quote 'a little bit of company wouldn't hurt'. The first few days were strange. You weren't used to have another being in your house but after three weeks everything felt normal again.

"Carol for the last time don't put everything in the fridge. You're not in space anymore !" You called with a laughter only to be greeted by a silent.

"Carol ?" You called and looked around your house.

It was isolated sure, but it was a big house, with a training room, a weapon room, a lab, four bed room, one huge living room, one office and three bathroom. And that was without counting the garage in which you store three motor bikes and two vans. That was the cool thing about being a SWORD agent.

"Carol ?" Your voice echoed as you entered in the training room.

There she was, only in a sport bra with a short, her headphone in as she was lifting the weight you had. At the sign you couldn't help but bit your lips as you caugh her abs and the way her muscle would tense up a little each time she was moving her arms.

"Like what you see ?" The blond cut you from your thought and you blinked before feeling your cheeks heat up.

"R-right sorry ! I wasn't- I didn't- I-" You stuttered and Carol smirked, moving closer to you until your body was stuck between the wall and herself.

It was weird. You never liked to feel overpowered by someone wether it was Dreykov, a doctor or even another Widow, you never liked to feel little. But now you had this weird feeling when Carol stood, a few inches above you, and you felt a sudden warmth on your cheeks.

"Do I make you nervous ?" She asked, her smirk still plastered on her lips.

"N-no ! I- um I wanted to tell you about the fridge and I got news, from Fury." You looked away and Carol stayed above you with a smirk for a few more second before moving away.

"You're pretty cute when you blush by the way !" Carol yelled as she stepped out of the training room and you blushed harder.

After taking five minutes to calm down, you made your way to you living room to see a hologram of Fury talking with Carol as the alien was standing clearly focusing on something.

"We think that he might attack them soon. So we hoped that you could find a way to reach them in time." Fury told, not noticing your presence and you frowned.

"The spaceship is not repaired yet how do you expect me to go on a different planet without it ?" The blond woman asked and you hide behind the door.

It has been week, to be honest you gave up on the team that was supposed to come to help Carol. Not that you wanted her to go, but other people needed her help and as selfish as you wanted to be you could not let them alone. For the past few days you've been working on her spaceship. Mostly at night when she was sleeping or when she was out on a morning run you would work in your lab. It was one of the perks of being training by the Red Room, you were smart and could work with basically everything. So yeah, you were trying your best to help Carol. And turns out you only needed a few more days before being repairing her ship fully.

"Listen, I'll try to do my best but I'm not promising anything okay ?" Carol replied annoyed and Fury gave her a tiny smile on the side with a nod before ending the call.

Stepping inside of the living room, you saw Carol sitting on the couch, visibly thinking about how she was going to reach the other planet in less than two weeks.

"Hey, what's wrong ?" You asked as you sat beside her and the other woman rested her head on your shoulder.

"Work stuffs. I need to get the spaceship going on but I won't be able to fix it on time." She roughly explained and you hesitated between telling her about your little work or not.

"I... I may be able to help with that ?" You expressed slowly and Carol looked at you with a hint of curiosity.

"I've been working on the space ship for the past few days. I wanted to surprise you. But seems like we don't have that much time anymore so hum, I just need to add the last thing to finish the total repair." You explained and Carol's eyes widden.

"Are you being serious ?" She asked and you nodded shyly.

That's how you found yourself standing in front of Carol's spaceship that you both carefully moved out your house's garage.

"Amazing." The blond grinned before looking around.

"How did you repair it in only a week. This is a masterpiece. Is that-" Carol cut herself and you nodded proudly.

"Your very own A.I base with voice command, print lock aaaand, it can also be use as a way to communicate throught the entire universe at your will." You explained and she awwed.

"You're amazing." She let out and you felt the blood rush to your cheeks.

"N-no it's nothing-"

"Y/n. Really. You are amazing." Carol told you with a smile.

"You too." You replied and you tried to ignore the butterflies in your stomach when you noticed Carol's neck turning red.

"Now we just need to finish the rest as quickly as possible."

꧁----------꧂

Now, almost six days later, you stood proudly infront of the spaceship as you wiped away some sweat on your forehead.

"YOU'RE GIFTED !" Carol yelled from inside the engine as the motor of the spaceship started and the light went on.

"THIS SPACESHIP NEEDED SO MANY RENOVATION THANK YOU Y/N/N !!" You heard and a giggle escaped your lips as Carol smiled brightly.

However, her smile quickly disappeared when she noticed the small frown on your face.

"Hey !" She called and you looked at her with troubled eyes.

"Is everything okay ?" The blond asked.

"I guess... But you'll have to leave now..." You explained with a hint of sadness and a frown appeared on Carol's face.

She hadn't think about that. In truth, Carol wanted to stay with you. Of course she wanted to. You were so kind, and smart, and gorgeous, and she felt so safe with you.

"I didn't think about that..." Carol trailed off and you sent her a sad smile.

"Right... Will I see you again thought ?" You called and the grin she gave you in return answered your question.

"I'll see you again." Carol replied and you nodded.

"Is that a goodbye word ?" You gave her a teasy smile and she laughed lightly, shaking her head slightly.

"It's a promise." Carol swore and you sent her a soft smile.

"Then I'll see you again Captain Marvel." You gave her a two finger salute and the blond mirrored your action with a confident grin as the space ship left the floor.

"You know, I'll see you again Space Widow." She answered before sending you one last smile before that the space ship took off into the sky.

It honestly just looked like a bright light into the sky for only a fragement of seconds. Yet you stood there for atleast thirty minutes, wanting for Carol to come back, telling you that something was wrong and that she needed you. But she didn't came back.

Atleast for now.

꧁----------꧂

"Agent Kovolsko !" A voice called and you looked up from your papers, stopping writing the lyrics for your new song.

You didn't wrote song often but it was something you quite enjoyed. And after not seeing Carol you felt like it was something you needed.

"What is it Belova ?!" You called and the younger widow barged in your room.

"Where is your bathroom again ?" She asked and you let out a small laugh before pointing toward the left with your head.

"Two doors down to the right." You told and the blond grinned.

You two met each other not long ago, a year maybe. You learnt about the destruction of the Red Room and when you decided to ask Fury if he knew anything about it he made you in contact with Natasha Romanoff, also known as the Black Widow. After meeting her, you decides to help free the last widows along with Natasha's 'sister'. At first you were confused but then you realize they were from one of those made up family by the Red Room and they found family in each other.

Smiling at the memory, you took your pen and started to write the first lyric of your song.

"Shooting stars never fly from me... My heart's on Mars it's kinda hard to see. You know, you know I'll see you again. You know, you know I'll see you at-" You sang softly while trying a few chord on your guitard but then you suddenly felt like something was wrong.

"What is happening ?" You called and then your head started to spin.

"Yelena-"

꧁----------꧂

Carol couldn't believe it. No. You weren't apart of those who disappeared that was just not possible.

Once the remaining Avengers went to kill Thanos. Carol only had one thought in her mind; going to you isolated house and cuddle in your bed after the both of you would have been too tired from working and share a kiss.

So right after they passed by Thanos, the super heroine exactly did that. She flew toward your house, followed by Natasha in the Quinjet who needed to check on her sister. Atleast that's what she told Carol.

"Y/n ?" Carol's voice echoed throught the house as the two women stepped inside.

"Yelena ?" Natasha called and the two heard the water running in the bathroom.

Rushing upstairs, Carol quickly opened the bathroom only to see that the water was still running. A rush of panic came to her as she remembered how you never let anything on, especially when you were out of the house.

"Y/n !?!" The blond half-alien called out running toward your room.

"Y/N ?!?" Carol called and then her world crumbled down.

Your room looked empty. The bed was made, the window closed but with open curtain, your pencil was laying on the ground while there was a bunch of papers by the window sit of the room. There was also a guitard lazily abandoned on ground and Carol took a trembling step toward the instrument. It was your favorite because it was the first thing you bought for yourself after escaping from the Red Room. She knew you wouldn't just let it lay around.

With an unsteady breath, Carol took the papers on your bed and she felt tears come to her eyes as she rode the words of your next song the title was 'Comeback Amor Right On Land (C.A.R.O.L <3)'. And this was enough to make Carol brust into tears.

Entering in your room quickly, Natasha had her own tears in her eyes. The ex-assassin crouched down beside Carol before taking her in her arms. They both had lost someone important to them. A sister and a lover.

꧁----------꧂

These were probably the five longest years Carol had in term of Earth time. She would go in space for missions, but whenever the later was over she would come back home. She would come back on land stay safe in your house. Because this is where you would want her to be. Or maybe you wanted her to stay in the tower with Natasha. But she couldn't let your house turn dusty. And here atleast she could wear your hoodies. She had to admit, they didn't smell like you anymore but it still brough her comfort.

During the big battle, you weren't there. Yelena was thought, and the moment she realized that Natasha was gone, she almost chocked Clint to death. Carol had to restain her and remind the blond assassin that Natasha loved her and wouldn't want that for them. But after the big battle. Carol didn't cross path with you. Strangely enough when she came to your house two days later, instead of getting the hug she was expecting, she was met with nothing but an empty house. No painting, no lab product, no book in your library. All of your things were gone as well as you.

You disappeared once again and Carol broke down on her knees once again.

Lonely

Part 2

#carol danvers #captain marvel #carol danvers x reader #captain marvel x reader #carol danvers imagine #captain marvel x you #carol danvers x female reader #carol danvers x you #Spotify

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volo-omnia · 2 months ago

Text

fuck it this is my house and i get to make the self indulgent content

if y'all are interested more i'll be rambling under the cut

So i redesigned my PLA self insert oc! I wanted to simplify the design a bit to be more "giratina" like but also taking some inspiration from some hanfu designs-

anyway long list of Gristen's character here we go

TLDR: I want to design Gristen as a foil to Volo, and someone who goes through an inverse character development to him (i.e., Volo is a villain and over time slowly reconsiders his plan being bad/redemption arc, whereas Gristen is a hero but slowly reconsiders nothing they did was worth it and thinks Volo might be right)

Gristen is actually a player character back from Pokemon Platinum, going through the normal events of Platinum through their early 20's and becoming the Sinnoh champion, and also became friends with Cynthia to help run the league now that Cynthia has stepped down/retired. Gristen at this time is still pretty stable, albeit a bit overworked as the Sinnoh champion but overall enjoying their life with the events at Spear Pillar/Distortion world behind them.

Cue being isekai'd several hundred years in past Sinnoh, now Hisui.

Gristen has now started back at zero. All of their memories got yeeted into the void (except their muscle memory for catching/battling), and they lost all their pokemon.

The events of Legends Arceus plays normally, with the minor exception of a certain blonde merchant Gristen catches feelings for...

Gristen as their base self is pretty optimistic and upbeat, eager to help out others and building a future for everyone. This is true for both Platinum and Legends Arceus, but since these are very different time periods, how people respond to Gristen is very different. (The latter obviously being much more suspicious and secluding from them)

However near the end of the game is when things start to shift. Over the course of the game Gristen slowly regains their memories, putting the pieces together who they are and what Arceus wants of them, and the tension between them and the village starts to amplify as Gristen becomes more aware people don't trust them (despite how much they're earnestly trying to help) and the rumors spreading of them being a sign of disaster don't go away.

Cue the rift disaster nearly destroying the world, Gristen gets banished from the village, and they take this really badly.

Gristen starts reconsidering their relationship as the region's champion/hero/savior and wondering why they choose to keep doing things with little/no reward. Their mental health starts tanking as well, and they start getting intrusive thoughts to just leaving the Galaxy Team and/or letting the people fend for themselves. (They don't give into these thoughts, despite everything Gristen does intend on helping others and wants to do the right thing.) Basically their optimistic personality starts to fade as they become more nihilistic, and even having weird feelings towards being Arceus' "chosen hero" despite not having any choice in this whatsoever.

Gristen starts hanging out with Volo more at this point, listening to his long talks on myths/history and the possibility of creating a new world and finds comfort that despite how everyone else treated them, Volo was still there for them.

Most of the game plays out normally, insert some self ship stuff here, and the rift closes and the world is saved. Gristen is forgiven and is allowed to return to the village, albeit they are very hesitant returning to their survey duties knowing how easily they were dropped before. The post-game plays out the same as well, with Gristen and Volo collecting the plates.

Cue the final battle at the Temple of Sinnoh and Volo's betrayal.

This is where the final thread of Gristen snaps. Given how well they handled being banished, upon Volo's betrayal Gristen is PISSED. Like, straight up considering the possibility of killing Volo. They are genuinely so upset that all their bottled feelings of everything they have went through is spilling out now. (Also, this exact moment is when all of Gristen's memories return)

Now this is where the events kinda diversify, there are a number of endings/outcomes I've thought depending on what the final outcome is at the final battle. Depending on both Gristen's and Volo's choices I've been playing with different arcs depending on the direction they go in terms of development.

Normal Ending: Gristen wins the battle, chooses to keep going as the game's hero, the events of the game plays out normally. Gristen and Volo never see each other again and Gristen is now left alone in Hisui. (Volo does get a bit of a redemption in this, as now when alone he's reconsidering if he was wrong in trying to create a new world. He's stubborn, and still set in his current canon self, but there are a few cracks.)

Bad Ending: Volo wins the battle. He destroys everything, becomes god, and creates a new world. Gristen straight up dies in this outcome. (If I'm really being lenient, I could do a more softer/fluff approach and have Volo keep Gristen alive for whatever reason, but hey this is my house and I can kill my self insert) This basically becomes a Volo-centric route.

Even More Bad Ending: Gristen wins the battle, but THEY choose to destroy everything and becomes god. This is Gristen's most nihilistic self, fully giving in to giving up and eliminating everything. (It should be noted that Gristen, unlike Volo, does not want to become a god, because now they're immortal and stuck with the revelation that they're responsible for EVERYTHING now. So basically Gristen is now in supernatural mega hell)

True Ending: Gristen and Volo both get therapy.

There's definitely different ways I wanna play with this, but Gristen is essentially my attempt at some sort of foil to Volo, reflecting trying to balance out as the "reasonable" voice of a normal person but also the potential to reflect his worst traits.

Upon the climax their dynamic is kinda in this weird state of love and hate? With Gristen's feelings boiling down to "I earnestly love and adore you very much but holy shit this plan of making a new world is the stupidest thing I ever heard of and want to strangle you for it" whereas Volo's feelings boil down to "I deeply resent you being Arceus' chosen one over me and believe I should kill you for it but I do hold some respect for you and think you're the only one that understands me"

But also I'm also doing all of this because I want to smooch Volo on the mouth. This whole thing is just an elaborate foreplay

#volo #volo pokemon #OC #oc x canon #selfshipping #yumeship #pokemon legends arceus #my art #im finally caving. this is my house and im no longer pretending i dont want to fuck the blonde man.#i think it might be healthy for me to project some of my traits onto a character/play with them too!#fuck it why not. i want a giratina fit

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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AITA for telling someone that roleplays are a two-way street and refusing to re-engage with them?

Occasionally, if I'm in the mood to write but I don't really know what, I'll browse ship tags on Omegle. Its become synonymous for roleplays, and I've found its (typically) pretty fun.

As with every social thing, there's the odd... Less than pleasant experience. Last night was one such experience. I connected to someone on a ship tag, they sent a prompt, and it was actually a pretty interesting one, so I responded.

It was an AU prompt, but I generally kept my characterisation as close to the character's canon as I could, while still matching it to roughly what someone's personality in that profession and location would be.

(E.g; if the character was a proper old-country style cowboy, or a socially awkward secretary, ect.)

It became very clear, very fast, that the other person had very, very specific ideas about the roleplay, what happens, what my character was supposed to say/do, ect. To the point where (as I later told them) they should've just written fanfic so they had complete control.

Near enough every time I responded, they'd "correct" it or argue against it both in character and in brackets as themselves. For example if I noted something about the background or story of my character, theirs would immediately say "no that's not what happened" or they'd say [hey actually can you change that, it doesn't fit/I don't like it/its not what I envisioned].

After about fifteen minutes of this I got incredibly vexed and decided I was done. I don't mind a roleplay having certain goals/main points/guidelines, but they were literally trying to control every tiny aspect of what I did. So I sent them this:

[I'm sorry, the RP sounded interesting in the prompt you sent, but its rapidly becoming clear you don't actually want a roleplay, you want to be the sole one dictating everything that happens. Honestly I think its best you turn this idea into a fanfic and not a roleplay. It kills off any enjoyment of the roleplay when I have you contradicting every tiny detail I include or dictating what I'm allowed to do or say. I'm not going to sit there waiting for you to approve of everything I intend to say. Thank you for your time, but good night.]

I disconnected, and decided I'd spend another fifteen minutes browsing the tag before I did something else. Well apparently, the other person decided they were going to spend fifteen minutes stalking the tag trying to find me again, spamming every connection with messages ranging from extreme insults and threats to demands I 'speak up again, bitch, I wanna talk' and so forth. After connecting to them for the tenth time, I sent:

[I'm not going to re-engage with you. I said what I did, and frankly, it was a valid statement. If you can't handle the fact that roleplaying means a 50/50 creative allowance with someone else, and that you can't micro-manage or bulldoze every single detail, then you shouldn't roleplay. Frankly, knowing how vile you can be from simple criticism, I'm glad I disconnected. Take a breather and re-evaluate yourself. I'd be embarrassed.]

Well. This morning I logged onto Tumblr and after some browsing, I actually came across them again. Here. By means of a post where they included screenshots of everything and are even going so far as threatening to stalk Tumblr and AO3 to 'match up the writing' so they can find me and presumably say their piece or whatever.

I talked to a friend about it, and surprisingly, they think I'm an asshole. Not for what I said in the first place, but for not re-approaching the other person (through DMs) so they'll stop filling the ship's tag with negative stuff. (They've made 3 posts about it all so far.)

I don't want to do that because it means opening up my private social media to this obviously unhinged individual. I know I can expect to be spammed, sent hate mail, have them try to track down my other socials, ect. I could make an alt account for it, but honestly that's effort I don't see the point in making. If they can't let this go, its not my problem.

AITA? Should I make an alt account just to let them get it out of their system? I don't know how to proceed with this.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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redmelawashere · 8 months ago

Text

Alright I got woken up at like 3 AM with FORBIDDEN MEMORIES™️ and remember that MelloNear literally had a fandom video game. What other fucking fandom has SHIPPING VIDEO GAMES.

I think it just hit me since recently I've been thinking a lot about how fandom spaces shift over time (especially as we have re-boots, live-actions, or other media that helps reinvigorate fandoms like currently with A:TLA) and honestly, MelloNear has had so many ups and downs and like…as someone who was in this fandom WAY too young and grew up with it I want to see how many people on tumblr, who were there in ye olden wild west days, remember the stuff I do and also for those of you who weren’t around back then but are big now, here’s the insane history that I remember:

1 - LiveJournal (LJ) and the LOST FICS LJ was initially one of the better places to find fics – but a lot of authors jumped ship when FF.NET started to take over and for other reasons that were before my time. Finding fics on LJ that haven’t been deleted was/is hard and their UI is trash I never could get a grasp on it. (The irony of FF.NET now being dead and people jumping ship to AO3 and Tumblr lol.) Astyzia_ii used to write really fucking good MelloNear stuff there. She was one of the first people I ever read that had insanely good Near characterization. Unfortunately, her account no longer exists. But some of the things she wrote were things like:

Near being a total brat (at the time, no one else was really writing Near like that. Including Near lying to Mello about being assaulted by other children at Whammy's, just generally putting him in his place, etc.)

Mello painting Near’s nails black (then this trope just went off on FF.NET and everyone was writing fics like that - I really like when stuff like this comes out of fandom)

Mello finding out that Near, despite being in love with him, thought Mello was so unapproachable he had sex with someone else (implied Giovanni) and Mello is basically confronting Near about it at a time when Near was treated as a prudish virgin in fandom

Finding each other in the apocalypse AU

Mello and Near being like high school sweethearts (salthearts?) and Mello wanting to go to a University in the BIG CITY but would ignore the offer if it meant staying with Near (and super tragic fic too. They pull over on a freeway after an argument about it and then Near just straight up gets hit by a car after pushing Mello out of the way 💀 and you don't know if Near survived)

And obviously, many more really creative AUs

2 - KurosakiAkane and VIDEO GAMES Akane, as Spanish artist and the original “cursed moons” drew some of the most viral and prolific MelloXNear doujinshis and EVEN MADE FANDOM VIDEO GAMES. Like I can’t believe I forgot about this. Akane literally made fandom yaoi video games and they were SO GOOD. What other fandom has shipping video games you’d think it’d be the norm I can barley wrap my head around it

Pretty sure her website (www.cursedmoons.com) is down so you can’t download them directly from there or see her full doujinshis anymore

Her DeviantArt account is still live so you can see some stills and teasers from her doujinshis.

Her LJ account is also still live but more so as an archive.

Her first game “D.nD Poisoned” can be downloaded here if you scroll to the bottom (but I haven’t checked the link so be wary…) but it was basically taking place during Whammy’s days, and yes, Mello has a knife cause he’s unhinged since those were just the times ig.

“D.nD Infection” was her second, unfinished game, which would have been when they were mid-Kira investigation post Mello blowing up the base. I found a website that hosts the short demo she released.

Her games literally inspired a new wave of AUs for the fandom in the fic department and she was just a titan who kept everyone together on all corners of the internet. When she decided to leave the fandom in like 2011 after 2010’s great FF.NET purge of M rated fics it kind of felt like the beginning of the end.

3 - Doujinshis (fandom comics) Most doujinshi artists had their own websites and MANY were Japanese / Chinese translated into English (pretty sure Akane was the first one to create them exclusively in English...). There are so many archived on YouTube that I used to watch all the time. You can even still find some of Akane’s doujinshi’s on Youtube like:

January

Lost Innocence

The Last Birthday

Game Over

Chocolate Kiss

One of the ones that was most impactful on me was this one that I cannot remember the name of, and it wasn't by Akane, but basically Mello, freshly 16 trying to stay alive, resorts to prostitution, and the big revealer at the end is he’s just kind of left there, alone, opens up his hand and there’s a little white puzzle piece he stole from Near and pretty sure the last line was something along the lines of “no one else” and I just 😭

4 - Lost Art and the Famous Water Colours

A lot of that water-colour MN art you see floating around was from, if I'm not mistaken, a Chinese MelloNear artist and their website I think was just "w" or something and she had created 100s of MN art.

5 - ForbiddenSoul562 and FF.NET Beef and Fan Fic Rap Battles

Soul was one of the BIGGEST creators on FF.NET (and luckily, she’s still active both on FF.Net and here on tumblr!) I remember when she had like a fic battle with another creator FragilePuzzle (who is also on tumblr and active – but they post M-ll-M-tt stuff now and pretty sure they deleted all their MelloNear fics... Their active handle on tumblr is mizzmellos I think? Anyways, they’ve also switched from writing to art and its really good!) And there was like a whole “vote who you think wrote the better fic” and it was like Clash of the Titans. Shame that Fragile, as they used to go by, doesn’t like MN anymore since they also wrote a lot of really good stuff. When Fragile stopped posting and Soul went on an extended hiatus that also felt like another beginning of the end loooooool (pretty sure Soul and Mzz had an interaction here on tumblr reminding each other of each other and I had so much social anxiety I was like headbanging watching this interaction go down and if I'm remembering correctly it started cordial but didn't really end well but I could be 100% misremembering the tone of the interaction but if you dig through Soul's tumblr you can probably find it or mzzs for that matter.) 6 - Kids Writing Dark Tropes

I feel like I should make another post and just…describe how Mello and Near were portrayed individually and in a relationship during that time since it was honestly insane. Very toxic, very star-crossed lovers who revolve around each other but are devastating together and are healthier a part, and so much more. I’m much happier with where their characterization and how the fandom has evolved currently from those times lol. But I think over the years I’ve also realized how fucking young all of us were (I was literally like…13 consuming all this media which retroactively, I’m like YIKES 18+ is 18+ for a reason and I even realized some of my favourite authors / creators who I thought were way older than me or like “cool teenagers” were also close to my age and not that much older so no wonder we were all writing crazy unstable relationship shit like that - which can be fun! - but this was literally all. the. time.).

Honestly that’s all I can remember for now but what a wild ride. I know FF.NET is like, a super hard platform to use now (and just gets worse every day 🙃) but if anyone wants some MN fic recs from the vault lmk and I’ll make a post about it.

-Redmela

#redmela screams #redmela rants #death note #mn #mellonear #meronia #cursed moons #like shit I wish Akane could have at least finished Infection I can't even begin to grasp the talent of writing/scripting/drawing/codding #ALL BY YOURSELF #FOR FREE #FOR THE FANDOM AND THE PEPOLE #mEANWHILE I have like 50 WIPs for multiple fandoms byeeeeeee #Mello | Mihael Keehl #Near | Nate River #D.nD Poisoned #D.nD Infection #Fandom video games #fandom culture #fandom history

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leonenjoyer69 · 5 months ago

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hiiiiiii i demand you drop everything you have on Elias like uh this instant (he’s so silly i love him ahajajsbdbsha)

KGKEKGKEK FIGHTER YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY TRYNA KILL ME, SENDING ME THIS ASK RIGHT AFTER DRAWING HIM 🫵 MY AUTISTIC ASS CAN'T TAKE ALL THIS POSITIVE ATTENTION, I'M GONNA SHAKE YOU!!!! JSKVKDKVK YOU'RE SO COOL!! FIGHTER WHEN I GET YOU, WHEN I GET YOU FIGHTER--

BUT, Since you asked so nicely I suppose I can deliver 🤭, lucky for y'all, @dustmint and I had an awesome discussion on Elias in the Mindscape (primarily on Mind Jekyll, hehe), all stemming from a drawing y'all will probably get to see quite soon (is this one :33). Once again, these are all messages from discord, so I'm sorry if the formating is weird but I really don't know how else to scribe these 😭 Mints messages are the indented green ones, and mine are the orange :3

(FIRST THO, Mint and I also came up with the ship names DayBreak (Jekyll and Elias) and NightFall (Hyde and Elias) bc we were feeling a little silly teehee (TYSM MINT FOR SUGGESTING SHIP NAMES ILY!!) but, also ofc there's Hydas (kinda reminds me of Midas, which I think is cute since they're both blond) and,,,, most the ones for Jekyll don't really flow as well, but Jekyias is pretty good :3)

Anyways, onto the discussion:

does a Mind Hyde exist in Lanyon's mindscape?? Or does Mind Jekyll just has some like characteristics that make him look a bit like Hyde 👁👁??

I think Mind Jekyll would just have some odd/intensified characteristics from Hyde. since Lanyon was able to see bits of Jekyll in Hyde before he even knew of the split, I think his mind would very quickly just connect Hyde back to Jekyll and skew his perception of Jekyll. Plus, I just don't think Hyde by himself has made enough of an impact on Lanyons life that he would get his own mind person, Lanyon barely knew anything about him and everything he learned about Hyde just kinda fed him more on Jekyll, and that's who he actually cares about. (Sorry if any of that is confusing jekvkksf english is hard rn) but!!! Mind Jekyll, right? Yeah, he would probably dislike Elias, Just like how Mind Lanyon dislikes Hyde. Mind Jekyll would probably think he's helping Lanyon (especially with how much *Lanyon* dislikes Elias) by either getting rid of (or at least keeping control of) Elias in the mindscape

Oooo, yeah, I think I understand :0 (dw! I understand that) Also, poor Elias, he already has some doubt about the real Jekyll liking him, and the Mind version of him just dislikes him 😭 would Mind Jekyll ever try to get rid of Elias in a similar way to what Mind Lanyon did? (Trying to cut off Elias's head) Also, how would Elias feel about Mind Jekyll disliking him and stuff?? ((Also, maybe Mind Jekyll tries to lock Elias in the mindscape or something like that 👁👁??)

.. I may be listening to Chonnys Charming Chaos Compendium in order, which *may* be swaying my ideas a bit, but I think Mind Jekyll would kinda play "nice" for a bit mayhaps? Like, he certainly doesn't act like he likes Elias, more so making it obvious that he just begrudgingly tolerates Elias's presence. As it goes on for a bit tho, Mind Jekyll would probably start getting worse, being much more open about his dislike and actively trying to lock Elias away in sections or rooms of the mindscape (maybe sometimes even with/near one of Lanyons stray nightmares?)

Elias has a *very* complex view of mind Jekyll, bc on one hand, it's *mostly* kinda the guy he loves, plus, having to deal with Mind Jekylls hatred is still better than going crazy all by himself in silence (at least at first). On the other hand, Mind Jekyll does hate him quite strongly and hurts his feelings quite often, making Elias even more likely to spiral. Mind Jekyll is probably one of the main reasons Elias absolutely detests the mindscape. Elias has certainly left the mindscape absolutely hysterical a good few times, going straight to Lanyon, because even *he's* better than having to deal with everything in the mindscape (when he's not simply forced into the mindscape and kinda trapped for a bit, of course. He basically stops going in willingly after a couple of Mind Jekylls schemes (and perhaps meeting his dad, or seeing the ballroom?))

👁👁👁👁 ~~Elias is really going through stuff, damn–~~ Imagine if maybe Elias only ever saw the ballroom but like very vaguely, from the corner of his eye sometimes, and just decided "I'm never going there" because it just gives him some bad vibes and stuff, and just, Mind Jekyll locks him/forces him to go there, and it's Elias just wanting to go away the whole time, not having a fun time while Mind Jekyll is just refusing to let him leave, dragging him by the hand and stuff– ~~(I'm sorry but I can't help but imagine maybe Elias telling what happened to Lanyon later, and Lanyon just like: "😨😰")~~

VJKDJVKEK OMFG YOU'RE A GENIUS, MIND JEKYLL FORCES HIM IN THERE AND HOLDS HIM IN A WALTZ AROUND THE ROOM, BUMPING INTO ALL THESE FACELESS PEOPLE AS THEIR SENSELESS CHATTER GROWS LOUDER AND LOUDER, GRATING ON ELIAS'S EARS AND SENDING HIM INTO A PANIC BC HE CAN FEEL THE HATRED COMING OFF OF ALL OF THEM JSJVKDKVK, ALL WHILE MIND JEKYLL HAS HIM IN A VICE GRIP, PROBABLY BEING THE ONE TO START ALL THE MURMURING THOUGHTS IN ELIAS'S HEAD-- Whoopsie my fanfic writing spirit took over 🤭🤭

OWHROWHDOWHDK 👁👁 Maybe Mind Jekyll is like first sort of talking to the faceless people, maybe flirting with some of them, while Elias is just awkwardly standing behind him, feeling very out of place, and at one point he just decides he's had enough of this, and tells Mind Jekyll that he wants to go, he wants to leave. And Mind Jekyll sort of teases him with an overly sweet tone, and says something how they can't leave just yet, to at least let him have a waltz before that and then them just waltzing and stuff. And maybe at one side it just feels very nostalgic because it makes him think of back when ~~he~~ Lanyon and Jekyll had their affair, or when Lanyon was teaching Jekyll hoe to waltz. But those memories keep getting drowned out by everything else that's going on. AND WHAT IF ELIAS FEELS AS IF THE TICKING OF THE CLOCK IS GROWING LOUDER AS WELL AND ADDING ONTO EVERYTHING ELSE, AND MIND JEKYLL JUST KEEPS TAUNTING HIM BUT AT THAT POINT ELIAS CAN'T DISTINGUISH WHETHER IF ALL THOSE THINGS ARE HIS THOUGHTS OR WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS SAYING. And then after somehow getting away from that ((and probably having a breakdown)) he just decides that he's never coming back there, and that he refuses to ever go into his mindscape ever since, and that he'll stay outside even if he or Lanyon are sick of each other because anything is better than that?? (Also, what if at one point they just. Lock him somewhere nearby the ballroom, and so Elias can still hear what's going on out there but he's locked and can't do anything except try to get out and listen to everything going on, and maybe he eventually gets out just because Lanyon drank the potion??)

LITERALLY READING ALL THIS AND GIGGLING OMFG IT'S PERFECT JDJVKEJKF YOU'RE A GENIUS ILYSM!!!! I MIGHT HAVE TO GRAB THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE BY THE THROAT AND BEAT IT INTO SUBMISSION BC OMFG I NEED TO WRITE SOMETHING LIKE THAT SO BAD NOW. AND JSKVKDKVKFK UGHHHH THINKING ABOUT HOW LANYON WOULD MAYBE REACT TO ELIAS FREAKING TF OUT OVER WHAT HAPPENED IN THE MINDSCAPE AND HAVING A FULL MELTDOWN. AT FIRST LANYON WOULD PROBABLY DEGRADE HIM FOR OVERREACTING AND BEING AS OVERLY EMOTIONAL AS USUAL UNTIL HE EVENTUALLY SEES HOW BAD IT TRULY SEEMS TO BE AFFECTING ELIAS AND HE ACTUALLY STARTS FEELING BAD KSKVKDKF

PQBDOQHDQODB, IMAGINE IF MAYBE IF THE REASON WHY HE WENT OUT OF THE MINDSCAPE WAS BECAUSE OF LANYON TAKING THE POTION. IMAGINE JEKYLL WAS WITH HIM, AND ELIAS JUST SORT OF GETS SCARED AT SEEING HIM CAUSE HE CONFUSES HIM FOR MIND JEKYLL FOR A SECOND, AND LIKE FLINCHES AND TELLS HIM TO LEAVE HIM ALONE AND GET AWAY FROM HIM MAYBE?? But also, Lanyon degrading him just making his meltdown worse, and then just Lanyon maybe eventually trying to help him?? ~~(also, what if at one point Elias just, for some reason *has* to go into his mindscape, and runs into Mind Jekyll after what happened at the ballroom)~~

OMG, JEKYLL WOULD *NOT* KNOW WHAT TO DO IF ELIAS HAD A BREAK DOWN IN FRONT OF HIM, *ESPECIALLY* IF IT WAS ACCIDENTALLY TRIGGERED BY HIM KDCKKFKEKD

BONUS POINTS!! Elias ends up running off to get away from Jekyll and Jekyll genuinely has no damn clue what to do and just sorta stands there super awkwardly for a while before looking for him. In that time, Elias has already hidden himself away somewhere, now stuck with just Lanyon as he absolutely melts down, drowning Lanyons words out with babbled explanations and questions and apologies. Eventually, Lanyon *does* in fact start feeling kinda bad and awkward and actually starts helping the best he can

If Elias gets forced into the mindscape after the ballroom fiasco he would definitely tread the mindscape more carefully. He'd probably hide in rooms and such, deciding that the loneliness was better than dealing with all of that (or something worse) again, and if he does come across mind Jekyll, he'd probably try to run off and hide, or at least try to lose him.

_______

Mmmm, Elias angst 🤭🤭 also!! Mind Jekyll would probably also be a poison enjoyer. I feel like Lanyon would be slightly scared of real Jekylls poison cabinet, bc why tf does that man need so many poisons, and have an underlying fear of taking any sort of potion from Jekyll. That's also probably intensified after he, ya know, takes one that splits him in two? But yeah, Mind Jekyll definitely encompasses that, lmao

But yeah, Elias does NOT get to have fun in the Mindscape. But hey, at least his clothes are comfy! And when he's in shadow/mirror form, he usually can't hear the pocket watch ticking, unless he's alone.

Additionally!!! I have a playlist for Elias, which if anyone wants to check out, is here. (It does have some unplayable songs tho, which is very sad bc I feel like they're the most accurate for him jekvkdk but!! I offer thee the links to listen to them on YouTube 😌 --- Love Psalm, Hole in the Sky, and Hell Frozen Rain)

ANYWAYS JDKVKKD THANK YOU FOR THE ASK FIGHTER ‼️‼️‼️ I'M GONNA GET YOU, YOU BETTER COUNT YOUR DAYS 😇😇 <3333

#oc: elias wright #mint is literally the best conspirator ever ILY ‼️‼️‼️<33333 #answered asks #my ramblings #tgs #jekyll and hyde #the glass scientists #lanyon takes the potion au #oc: mind jekyll

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sp4ceboo · 1 year ago

Text

Burn: Darth Maul x Reader

A/N: once again the picture is not mine (like obviously i could never make anything as good as that)

Warnings: violence, family problems, mentions of sexual stuff, swearing,

Word count: <1500

You want to curl up into a ball and cry. This isn't what families are for; families are supposed to be tight knit and able to rely on each other for support, not whatever this mess is. Sometimes, they'll come to you to dump their problems on you, sometimes to complain about each other, sometimes to yell at you, to take their stupid anger out on you.

Sometimes, they just ignore your entire existance.

It's okay, you tell yourself. Everyone goes through rough spots in life, and arguements are just a learning experience, right? Mistakes happen, not everything can always be perfect, it will all sort itself out over time, and they'll all heal and make up.

That's what you tell yourself, anyway. For now, you just stalk around the cold hallways of your ship, wishing they wouldn't comm you so often, interrupting the artificial calm you've made for yourself inside your head with their petty words. They like to pin the blame on you, for not being there often enough, for not being there to back them up or disagree with that brother or listen to that parent. Everything seems cold, impassive and uncaring - the glitching blue of their image as they rant to you, the dull grey of the walls of your ship, the dead eyes that stare back at you in the mirror. You're tired of it, and even that exhausting emotion is so familiar you hardly feel anything but that numb sort of cool when you walk bare foot in snow for too long.

The only solace is Maul.

He burns, bright and livid, never passive, never anything but intense - intense in his gaze, in his actions, in his blazing passion. The Sith don't do things half heartedly, he tells you, and you believe him. Maul never fails to make you feel something, whether it's that damned ache in your chest when he holds you at night or the pain that spears through you when you duel. His flames warm your soul to the point of burning, and the pain of love is a relief.

You want him now. Not to trace the black tattoos marked into his crimson skin, not to drag your lips down his sculpted chest, but to fight through the exhaustion until there's nothing left but hardened instincts and the whirl of glowing blades. Grabbing your lightsaber from your bedside table, you stalk through the corridors of the ship on high alert. When you're in this mood, both of you know anything goes for a battle ground - he could ambush you at any moment, he could pop out of the vents in the ceiling, and you'd be forced to react. At some point, he'll recognise the change in your force signature - he may have noticed it already - and you'll temporarily go from lovers to hunters. It barely takes a breath to slip into that headspace; your family is gone from your head, your worries flee, chased away by primal senses that slide into place, snarling and ready for another bout.

Keeping your footsteps quiet, you strain your ears, listening for the soft pad of his deadly footsteps, searching for the way the air warms and wilts around him. It's as if he takes in life, soaking it up and pulling it around his soul like a shield. Something in the air changes, and you perk up, knowing his close. His presence is hard to miss, strong and tantilising, beckoning to you in a way those from the Light Side never did. There is no doubt that he is a Sith, no doubt that the sight of him quickens your pulse and sends your heart thrumming against your ribcage.

The pressure of the air changes. You don't turn, don't let the movement expose your left side to him; instead, you bring your lightsaber up behind your head, blocking the swing that many Jedi would have missed. But not you - you are no Jedi. You are a Grey, your blade shining white, a mockery of purity. You are nothing near pure, not with your dealings with a Sith, not with the things you've done, not with your burning attachment, as bright as a million stars.

Maul's chuckle sounds, soft and near seductive in its tone, and now you turn to face him, a smirk pulling at the corners of your lips as you meet him, blow for blow. You don't look away from his golden eyes for a second, holding his gaze and sinking claws into it, reading every single move he'll make a second before he'll make it. His eyes narrow, watching you.

'There's something different about you today,' he murmurs, his soft, eloquent voice somehow still audible over the clash of your lightsabers. 'There's nothing different,' you snarl.

You can feel yourself slipping. Your upperhand is falling away, because he's begun to break you from the headsapce you were in before. Mention of your family, even indirectly and unintentionally loosens your grasp on your headspace, prying your grip off finger by finger, and you falter, breaking eye contact for barely a millisecond, but it's enough.

Maul takes the chance. Slipping past your normally impenetrable guard, he flicks a foot out, causing you to stumble, and knocks your weapon out of your hand. Chest heaving, he levels his lightsaber with your throat. The bloody crimson of it thrums as if taunting you, mocking you for letting something as stupid as a family arguement to throw you, and you snarl, hurling out a hand in response, attempting to use the Force to send your hilt spiralling back into your fingers.

You don't get the chance to return it to your hold. Maul grabs your wrist, halting your movements, and you glare up at him, a challenge in your eyes. You don't expect to see what you do in his gaze - concern. He's never like this, not when you're fighting, not when both of you should be thinking of nothing but the reflexes and instincts that guide you to move in the way you do: around each other, with each other, lethal yet perfectly secure. You are both partners in a deadly dance and combatants in an elegant battle.

'What's wrong.' You growl, trying to pull out of his grasp. 'Nothing's wrong, Maul.' 'Then why did I feel that in the Force?' He gestures vaguely at your head, knowing that you'll have no problem understanding. 'I don't know what you're talking about,' you hiss, eyes darkening. 'I think you do,' he replies, bringing his face close to yours. 'I don't know why you don't want to admit it, though. So, I'll ask you again. What's bothering you?' You finally manage to escape his iron grip. 'Nothing.' 'Why can't you tell me?' 'Why can't you let it go?' 'Why are you lying to me?' 'Why can't you just leave it?'

Maul falls silent at your tone. In his eyes, concern still lurks, but above it, his temper has risen, golden and burning as his gaze. You don't want to talk to him about this, you want to let yourself deal with it alone, because what can he do? Murder your whole family? Maybe it'd give you some peace of mind, but you really would prefer if he didn't, just because of the stuff you'd have to clear up after it. There are far more important things in the galaxy for you to worry about. You begin to turn away, deciding to walk off back to your quarters and wallow in shame for letting Maul see this part of you, but he leans forward, taking your chin in his fingers.

'I can't just leave it, because it's worrying you. It's weighing heavily on your mind - it must be important. It takes a lot to distract you, darling.' You laugh deprecatingly. 'It's not important, Maul.' 'It is if it keeps you from beating my ass,' he huffs, crossing his arms. 'You almost had me.'

It's obvious to you now that he's not going to stop bothering you about it. You sigh, hugging yourself in your own arms: a desperate attempt to shield yourself from Maul's eyes; eyes that will pick you apart with just a look, able to see through anything you display to the outer world, able to see parts of you you're not even sure you're aware of yourself. There's no escaping him, and maybe you don't want that. Maybe you're just scared he'll think you're weak for letting your family piss you off, but then, maybe he'll think nothing of it. Maybe you should simply stop worrying about how he percieves you.

'My family are being bastards,' you mumble before you chicken out. He smiles. 'There we go.' You cock your head. 'That's it?' 'What else is there to say?' He asks. 'They're bastards for blaming everything on you, then complaining to you about their own shit. I'm glad you've realised that, but I won't kill them unless you tell me to, darling.' You huff. 'You're rude.' 'You know you love me,' he answers.

You let Maul wrap his arms around you. Leaning into his chest, you bask in his warmth, letting the flames consume you, letting the burn thaw your heart and defrost your emotions until you're not numb any more. Until you can feel again.

#star wars #darth maul #maul opress #maul x reader #darth maul x reader

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irisviel101 · 7 months ago

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EnNatsu | The Whole Journey

I see a lot of people saying that EnNatsu came out of nowhere. As one of the biggest shipper of this ship, I decided to compile the standout EnNatsu moments and see exactly how much they developed through out all the three seasons of the OG series.

The first episode introduces both characters and their dynamic effectivey. Natsumi threatens to disband the soccer club if they don't win against Teikoku Gakuen in their first ever match, which obviously makes Endou angry — so much so that he's fuming even when talking to the team.

This scene sets the tone for most of their initial interactions going forward: they bicker and push each other's buttons even as they slowly start to strive for the same goal. Natsumi is condescending at times but she also helps the team in her own way, and Endou is generally a happy person, but no one can annoy him like Natsumi can.

It's subtle but as Natsumi slowly becomes integrated into the team, they start having some more friendlier interactions even aside from Natsumi informing them about the matches and stuff.

Slowly, they become friends.

Their bickering also becomes more friendly instead of being just about Natsumi threatening to disband the club or about Natsumi picking at Endou's passion for soccer.

Like at the end of episode 16 when Endou and Aki visit Natsumi and her father in the hospital.

Natsumi immediately notices Endou's injury and is genuinely happy to hear that the team won their match, two things she never would have done in the start of the season.

The argument that comes after it is about Endou misunderstanding Natsumi's words, and it's more laid-back than their arguments in the start of the season when Natsumi would threaten to disband the club or pick at Endou's overenthusiastic passion for soccer. It's nothing but friendly bickering between friends, showing how far they've come in their friendship since the beginning even if they are very much still the same people.

Then we have this scene in episode 19.

Natsumi, who's visiting her father in the hospital and feeling melancholic because it's a hospital and her father is admitted in it, sees the tower near which Endou always practices and goes there on a whim. And when she gets there, she automatically envisions Endou practicing as usual.

When Endou sees her there, he can tell at first glance that something's btohering her, even if she says that things are getting better. And what does he do? He takes her to his favorite spot and reminds her that she isn't alone.

I believe this is the moment where Natsumi really developed her crush. Before this, their whole dynamic was "enemies to friends" and now they're moving on to the "friends to lovers" bit.

Endou, of course, doesn't see it that way just yet, and I doubt even Natsumi sees her crush as a crush, but this is the moment where it actually starts.

(Reblogging to continue because I can't add more pictures)

#inazuma eleven #ie #ina11 #endou mamoru #raimon natsumi #ennatsu #otp #analysis #character analysis

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weird-bookworm · 2 years ago

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ᴍᴀꜰɪᴀ!ꜱᴇᴠᴇɴᴛᴇᴇɴ

HYUNG LINE MAKNAE LINE

a/n: been wanting to do this for a long time now, hopefully y'all will like it <3 i don't really do reader x member stuff though, so this'll just either be member x member ships or no romance at all 😅

pairing: jihancheol, junhao, verkwan

genre: headcanons, fluff, crack, romance (kinda), angst (?), mafia

warnings: slight mentions of non-graphic violence, illegal stuff obviously

S.Coups

leader, for obvious reasons

hella protective over the guys, will kill for them

won't admit it, but also very soft for them

belonged to a family already involved with the mafia, knew the inner workings of an organisation like this since very young

unforgiving and unrelenting if he sets his mind on something, especially if that something is revenge

lost his parents to a rival mafia early on, was out for revenge when he stumbled across the members one by one, and that's how svt

came to be

did end up taking revenge, the rival gang doesn't exist anymore

helps in cleanup because muscles

worries about the others during missions but then tells himself that he's being stupid and everyone has had years of experience and there's no one he would rather trust

has known jeonghan and joshua since they were 14

is also very whipped for said men (and their puppy dog eyes)

ruthless, yes, but holds his member's opinions in high regards

often pretends he doesn't see the members going out of their way to take care of him after a rough day so they don't get embarrassed

once went MIA for a week

the group was in hysterics, there was chaos everywhere, some were worried, others were ready to kill, the mansion almost burned down at least 7 times, half of them were starving by the end of it because everyone was just so darn busy trying to find where he disappeared

jeonghan, jihoon and seungkwan almost lost their minds trying to bring order to the chaos (a near impossible task, let's be honest)

only for him to return later, very confused about the welcome he got (his members on top of him, most of them either already crying or on the verge of tears and a very angry jeonghan, seungcheol had never feared for his life more)

turns out he had left for a overseas meeting; it was sudden and he was urgently required in the middle of the night

in his defence, he had left a sticky note on the door of their bedroom, for maximum visibility, which no one had noticed somehow (you'd think they'd be good at this shit, being, y'know, mafia members)

he never let them live this down, but only after he made sure jeonghan and jihoon weren't going to murder him in his sleep

got scolded about forgetting his charger before going on the trip in retaliation (which is why he couldn't text or call them)

wonwoo threatened to replace his phone and give him a normal one instead of the non-traceable ones he made specially for the group

was reluctant at first, but warmed up to the idea of dating and is now in a poly relationship with jeonghan and joshua

Jeonghan

the seducer, again, for obvious reasons

looks like an angel and acts like one too, but only for the kids

can be really scary when he wants to be

the kids have a weird sense of respect for him and the way he gets shit done

can be surprisingly lazy

too good at mind games

knows how to crumble even the toughest person

has his fair share of bad days

needs cuddles all day long

will demand them like a baby

the members will then proceed to do some manly cuddling

ran away from home at the age of 13, but no one knows why, even his boyfriends

met seungcheol when he was 14 by chance in a convenience store, trying to swipe a loaf of bread under the cashier's nose while flirting with her

he gave him a place to stay and food to eat

that's when he knew he was in love

poor baby was very confused when he fell for joshua because he still definitely was in love with seungcheol

knows he is ethereal and uses the knowledge with the precision of a knife

low-key the mother of the groups, fusses over little things

also radiates chaotic gay energy 24/7

somehow even ropes the most responsible, calm members into doing some weird shit on a daily basis

has made it his personal mission to annoy the hell out of seungcheol and joshua

gets annoyed when it doesn't work and they just get fond instead

prefers knives and daggers over guns and has learned the art of swordfighting

has a hard time trusting someone new

got himself kidnapped in their early days

had gotten a little cocky at the consecutive successes they had been having and hadn't bothered to hide the knife properly

said knife stuck out like a sore thumb and a rival gang hadn't even waited long enough to let him get to where he was supposed to be before abducting him

was tortured with all kinds of punches and kicks

the torturer sadistically didn't hit his face

the group had to give a huge ransom for him

felt guilty for ages before vernon, surprisingly enough, slapped (literally) some sense into him

was so shocked he didn't even think about scolding the younger for hitting someone older than him

came to accept that mistakes happen

but is still careful on every mission now

Joshua

the 'undercover agent'

trained with jeonghan and jun

but works closely with seokmin and vernon

often infiltrates other gangs posing as a new recruit

a genius in disguises

can go from looking pretty to looking like a blotchy old man with a hump in no time and barely any special materials

loves posing as girls

flirts a lot as a girl

then renders his target unconscious to get the required information

because a lot of pervert gang leaders are actually stupid enough to take their one night stands to important places like their offices or bedrooms

if anyone was to ask him a memorable experience, he would tell them about the one time he had to switch disguises from an old bearded man to a pretty young lady

and how he forgot to take the beard off and had worn the bra the wrong way

he was supposed to be going for an interview for the secretary of the ceo

got a itch on his nose in the elevator and realised the beard was still on his face

was very glad that he was alone in the elevator

checked himself just in case and found he still had a flat chest

had to take off his blouse, put the bra back on properly

and then get dressed again, all in less than a minute

gave wonwoo hell because he hadn't warned him despite having eyes on every single camera in the building

only got a laugh in response

is weirdly obsessed with water

he and jeonghan make a pair to be reckoned with

poor seungcheol loses his mind on a daily basis with these two someone save him

gets homesick really easily

will spend ages talking with vernon in english when he feels so

a master ventroquelist

this unexpectedly has come in hand way too many times

his original dream was to be a preschool teacher

still questions how he ended up where he is on a near daily basis

doesn't regret it one bit though

a proper gentleman, but only when he isn't in the mood to do some crazy shit

which actually isn't that often

but god knows it's intense when it happens

obviously everything he ever plans he plans with jeonghan

and the target is always seungcheol

"the others don't lose their patience as quick as you, y'know, you're fun to tease"

*cue cheeky grin and getting chased by a mad cheol*

Jun

more of a lure than a seducer, but prefers the latter term

way too confident

but only in his face

gets adorably flustered if someone compliments him on anything other than his face

a goofy lil shit

everyone will collectively unanimously agree that he is the group's weirdo

he won't even try to deny it

had a hard childhood, was attention and touch starved

his family went bankrupt and the first thing they did was "kick out the liability"

was working a part time job secretly though and decided to change countries

that's how jihoon stumbled upon him, on the street

revels in attention

top class humour

loves to act all coy and pretty and damsel-in-distress on missions

says it attracts people easily

only to go all 'i-am-an-expert-martial-artist-fear-me' on them

except it's not quite as funny as it sounds

because he is trained in all sorts of traditional martial arts

of most east asian and south-east asian countries

half of whose names the other members can't even pronounce

often worries the others by preferring to go into missions without any weapons

says it helps in maintaining the cover

which it certainly does

and that he doesn't need any weapons anyway

"i am a weapon"

*grin*

(it's fine but only because it's jun 👀)

practises with minghao, who is not quite as trained as he is, but gets the job done

has insane stamina

once fought a small rival gang in hand to hand combat all by himself

flexible as fuck

makes too many dirty jokes about it

(must be the only idiot to actually make dirty jokes about himself smh 😔)

sleight of hand

master pickpocket

steals from the members just for the fun of it

they don't even blink an eye when they find something missing, will simply go to his room and find whatever they are looking for on his dresser

is also somehow very forgetful

a babie

Hoshi

the pyromaniac

prefers to be called the entertainer of the group though

had a weird penchant for fire when he started

once set fire to the headquarters of a small gang

really liked doing that

so they gave him asked him to work with seungkwan and chan

and make bombs and fire guns of all sorts

is also weirdly obsessed with tigers

(but don't we all know that already 😩)

one of the few members who uses an alias in the mafia world

has too much raging gemini energy

strangely intuitive when it comes to finding traitors

or the person responsible for committing whatever new atrocity svt is dealing with

hates wearing suits

but still enjoys how good and authoritative he looks in them

until he goes all crazy again

annoyingly loud

also annoyingly sweet

he and seokmin are sunshine in human form

almost has the same amount of weird energy as jun

they are the gemini twins after all

will either get on your nerves on a daily basis

or will convince you to help him get on someone else's nerves

very squishy

dramatic, but not in the drama queen way

just in the attention seeking way

doesn't really mean it, it just happens

is actually an introvert, but has a hard time believing it himself

most of everything he owns is tiger themed

even has a customised yellow gun with black stripes

they don't let him take it out though, so just uses it for practise in the headquarters

can and will steal the member's clothes and accessories

and will proceed to tease them about it

he doesn't know, but everyone is very fond (read:whipped) for him

even the younger members

because god knows he acts more like a maknae than the real maknae

has a fourth degree taekwondo black belt

also helps in cleanup

a surprising amount of things need burning after fights

can withstand a high amount of heat because of how used he is to it

another babie

Wonwoo

the tech guy

or as ned would say, the guy in the chair (im sorry i had to 🙈)

smarter then he looks

which is saying something because he already does look smart

nimble and quick fingers

has glasses, goes kinda blind without them

was a streamer before he joined

hence the affection to computers

still games, but doesn't stream anymore

a master at puzzles

works with chan for new projects, the younger is good at assembly while he handles the programming and electric part of everything

svt only ever uses the cctv cameras made by him

so they're never compromised

seldom joins the others for field work

becomes the guys' eyes and ears for most missions

one of the best hackers out there

also one of the quickest

the guys had a special basement made just for him

just in case someone manages to enter the headquarters

has a tinier but just as strong basement under his house too

for emergencies

only the 13 of them even know where to get to the basement (in the headquarters)

and he is the only one who knows the passcode required to enter

the room is absolutely filled with all things computer

was one of the first people to meet seungcheol and jihoon

they also forced him to learn hapkido when they met him

is a black belt now

practises with jun and minghao weekly

usually quite and reserved

his crazy side comes out rarely

but when it does, it comes in full force

his parents still think he works for an IT firm

said firm is actually a legitimate cover to the shady ongoings in svt

so he never really has troubles coming up with realistic stories

does help the employees there though

has his name stated in the official employees list

the other members either haven't noticed or don't care

because he probably hacked into the website to put his name there

an easy task considering he was the one who made it in the first place

once ate some dish with crab while giving instructions during a mission

threw up all over his brand new computer

demanded to know who ordered it

turns out it was him who accidentally clicked on the wrong dish while ordering

was sheepish

but still threw out the computer

Woozi

sub leader

seungcheol's right hand man

and his left hand man

and a lot more

is the entire group's reality check

enjoys more authority over the members than seungcheol does

but that's because they can't bully him like they do with seungcheol (some save him pt. ∞)

does a lot of jobs in the group

mainly helps in cleanup

also does the recruiting

made the entrance tests for people looking to join

designed them himself

while cheol decides what to do, he decides how to do it

did i mention he's actually cheol's cousin?

a very distant cousin

but a cousin nonetheless

his family had also always been involved in the mafia world

he ran away from home though

said it was too toxic

even for a literal criminal gang

still wanted to work in a mafia though

him and cheol had been close when they were younger

got to know about how the elder was planning to take revenge for his parents

was the one to convince him to actually form a proper gang before doing anything stupid

said he'd help

refused to be the leader

but agreed to have a position of importance

unnervingly good at predicting stuff

...all sorts of stuff

can usually tell the weather of the entire day early in the morning

but more often than not acts as a warning system to the guys on field

which is the entire reason he even accompanies them

they once went near an abandoned river to search for something

said they would find something even more precious

they found a small pouch filled with black opals

is the personification of 'i might be small but you're all still beneath me'

(i am inclined to agree ✊🏻)

actually a lil cutie though

not anywhere near as cold as he seems

might wanna read:

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