#now shut up about it brain and go write

[tales-from-nocturnaliss]

If I could give a piece of advice to autistics like me, or simply autistics who struggle to navigate the world and wonder if there's any way to make the pressure of Changes in your brain alleviate at all:

Develop an obsession for finding solutions.

(and to autistics who can't: tl;dr ask someone like me to help you, I would be thrilled)

For the record: I used to be incapable of that. It is legit a skill I taught myself over time, mainly from becoming a better critic for my own writings (yes, skills cross-play with the rest of your life).

Situation: I'm a pretty big tea drinker. I don't like metal filters, I drink by the mug because I like to make different teas in a day. I therefore chose paper filters years ago, and have been happily using them ever since.

Problem: the store we go to stopped carrying them.

World-shattering problem: the brand stopped making them altogether.

Result: with only four filters left, I had to hurry to find an alternative that was still qualitative. I found some, ordered a box a couple of days ago, it arrived today... and the bags are HUGE. Size had not been mentioned, and the packaging made them look small and mug-sized. I am not happy. I'm still gonna use them, but my brain has now been looking for better alternatives for a couple of hours because cannot tolerate to not. Have. The. EXACT. Thing I used to have. Especially considering prices. Dunno what happened, but those quadrupled since last I bought a box a few months ago (no, it's not the size that does it, I checked).

Result 2: I know my brain, and I know it's gonna be a bitch about this filter business. It has been. It's driving me insane (and the husband I expect, who received a litany of comments on Discord as I searched/found potential alternatives/other sites to buy from). It just Can't Let Go, because tea, tea is important, I love tea, I NEED an alternative to coffee because it causes me depression, I need a simple alternative because I am not executively functional in the morning, when I have my first tea.

End result: did you know they make glass tube filters now?

My brain fell in love the moment it saw the photo, and has decreed the tube to be The Only Viable Alternative now. It's cheap, resusable, dishwasher safe, I do love glass items, and it's perfect for a single mug and oohhh I wanna see the leaves dance in my mug without getting into my mouth. It's perfect.

A perfect solution that I found because 1. I couldn't let the problem go (I feel like everyone'll understand me on that front <<), 2. I fixated on finding a different site that sells the right filters, 3. I remembered I have a stainless steel filter somewhere that I could try, but first googled its effects on health, 4. I found an article about that (in French) and discovered other available materials, 5. I googled glass filters out of curiosity and tadaaaaa. Which sounds like a lot of steps. But the hyperfixation + need to find a solution ASAP really breezed me through it.

And I know: not everyone is able to do this. To you who aren't able, I want to say: please, ask someone like me to help you find solutions. I LOVE finding solutions. I love the search, I love the dopamine I get from finding something, and I also love to make people happy, which is extra dopamine. Can't guarantee I'll find these solutions if they're country-specific, but you can bet I'll try to help you to the best of my ability because, yes, I believe we ALL deserve some happiness. And some help.

And now I can finally stop procrastinating but my brain really demanded I write this up to conclude this Tea Chapter. Thank you for tuning in, see you next time my routines are disrupted and/or shattered.

Edit: I have now called myself a tealchemist to the husband and understood exactly why the tube thing appeals to me. Alchemists are a big part of Aeyuu('s issues... XD;)

[thekittyokat]

you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

fire and the thud came on my spotify shuffle while me and my sister were listening to music this afternoon, and at the end of it she turns to me and goes “who was that? the lyrics sound like the kind of thing you’d write” and honestly i think it’s one of my favourite unintentional compliments i’ve ever received

[wexhappyxfew]

Rosie about literally everything Judy has ever said

CONFIRMED: judy rybinski says *any* sort of word (example: rambling about oranges being her favorite thing ever) and rosie is automatically all ears watching her with hearts in his eyes no doubt.

TOO GOOD FRIEND ITS TOO GOOD !!!!!

[smoosnoom]

incredible submission by @http-byler :) sobbing btw

[heartstringsduet]

😭😭😭😭😭😭

🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

[the-kipsabian]

i also dont know why i get such overwhelming feelings of stupidity and guilt these days when im blorbo posting. especially if its about kip. it just comes to me every time nowadays and i dont know why

[roseverdict]

why they ourple in the shwoer

[iceskatingmobsters]

so. ffxiv classes for Outer Wilds characters? I am interested

you ever accidentally leave something in your drafts for like a week? anyways, it appears you have activated my trap card--

this is a VERY incomplete list because I'm in between classes for a lot of them. everyone gets a dps and support class so party composition can be shuffled around (because thinking abt party dynamics is half the fun). this is gonna be disjointed as hell bear with me and under a read more because it got LOOOONG. spoilers below ye have been warned

Feldspar: your honor this is a dragoon and I refuse to take any other answer. as for a support class, they're definitely a tank and I can preeeeetty much see them going any tank that isn't paladin but I lean dark knight personally -- the invuln in particular sells it for me, more than warrior's even, because you refuse to die and THEN heal yourself back to full. very self sufficient but still needs help from the party. still can very much see them as a warrior (who needs a healer when you have bloodwhetting) or gunbreaker (superbolide is an objectively funny ability and my brain can't let go of the image of feldspar panic-bolide-ing)

Slate: the easy answer is machinist and gunbreaker and I'm going with that. with all the stupid stuff that machinist gets in its later levels ESPECIALLY like you get a flamethrower and multiple attack automatons it's practically tailor-made for slate "my autopilot throws you into the sun but it's functioning so I'm using it" outerwilds. gunbreaker I'm less sure about for lore reasons but I do know that should Slate go gunbreaker they superbolide maliciously (gossan refuses to heal if slate is tanking). can also see them going black mage or warrior as well

Gossan: I had a hard time pinning them down to be honest!! I've mostly settled on sage/ninja. NIN is flashy but not as much as dragoon is, plus it's more precise than DRG's "jump in the middle of the pack with a trail of fire and pray." also, trick attack/mug I rest my case. could also see them swinging monk because iirc monk has more overall party buffs (possibly red mage but my brain insists they're melee). as for sage this was more of a process of elimination -- I wanted them to be a barrier healer but I didn't think scholar fit them. sage's multitasking "do damage to heal" also Fits in my head for whatever reason

Hornfels: astrologian/red mage. they keep the observatory of COURSE they're an astro! the entire job quest is about awakening your abilities through observation of the stars! I also like the idea of them being a pure healer vs gossan's barrier healing but this is just to service the "slate healchecks the party with superbolide" joke. red mage because it's got so much party utility and Hornfels Is A Mage (black mage Hornfels would be very funny though considering black mage/thaumaturgy lore I'm not sure they'd go that route. summoner maybe, but again, considering lore eehhhhh unsure if Hornfels would like to square up with bahamut any time soon. most hinged member of owv)

Esker: my s.o who loves esker dearly is 100% convinced Esker is a blue mage which is very good considering it's a limited class but in the context of "everyone is actually in eorzea" I myself think they'd go for summoner and a tank (I'm leaning warrior). despite the summoner class quests once you actually do square up with various monsters and primals it gets pretty relaxed from there, and that fits prettty well -- esker did a lot of scary work getting the moon base up and running, and now they're kinda vibing, even if it does mean that the others esp. the newer owv members forget the work they put in (hey remember when summoner had a five-minute/sixty skill opener???). tank, specifically warrior because... ok forgive me but you know the end of bloodborne when gehrman gets up from the chair? That's Esker

Gabbro: they're a bard. quintessential full stop bard. like bard barely has a real rotation you just hit your procs as they light up and the later class quests are "one of your two job tutors and the one that is ACTUALLY A BARD fucks off to do smth stupid and unrelated and comes back with something useful and poignant, somehow" hi hello COME ON. I'm putting their support class as tank but I feel like they pretty much go bard exclusively. if they do tank I initially thought paladin but maybe they get DRK rights after being stuck in a time loop idk. that's probably enough angst to awaken an Esteem if gabbro decides to unpack that (they won't)

Riebeck: scholar scholar scholar it's perfect considering how archaeology-focused the SCH quest line is. Riebeck also deserves a cute lil fairy friend please give this fish eos they deserve a break!! as for THEIR dps class they have to be ranged, no way in hell Riebeck is getting within five ft of Thing That Wants To Kill Us. they're probably either bard or red mage (RDM being the relative Sanest magic dps option though good luck convincing them to Actually Do their melee combo). they'd be a shoe in for MNK since its questline is also about restoring a lost offensive art but, again, not brave enough for that ;; (though that would be a beautiful lil self conatined character arc, going from bard to red mage to monk as they get more confident and braver)

Chert: 100% astro they wear a scarf embroidered with the stars. this also furthers my "hornfels as chert's mentor" agenda (that I really wish I saw more of YES I have wips about it). also it's got lovely angst potential considering astrologians are supposed to divine the future from the stars : ^) I'm pretty sold on chert going monk for its themes of discipline, and because despite its scrappy beginnings, it's also a pretty precise class. could also see them as samurai considering how seriously that class takes itself (at least in its first four or five questlines, I've only got it to 59 yet oops). chert absolutely gets Melee Rights tho

Hatchling: omniclass they get to do whatever they want LOL no, actually, in all seriousness I have them as a PLD -> DRK and reaper. the reaper choice is based on the newest dungeon where you get some lore about a former I think garlean settlement that gave rise to reapers for defence purposes (they were farmers that basically made deals with demons to protect their home from demons iirc) and the nomai could absolutely fuckin stand in for that, so it makes a sort of poetic sense that the hatchling would pick that up after them. PLD to DRK for the same reasons as Gabbro but the hatchling sure does unpack all that

As for the other villagers, I only have four that I have solid ideas for right now. Gneiss is a bard/white mage, Hal is a scholar (there is a part of me that wants to make them a black mage as well since black mage invents new spells all the goddamn time and definitely not because I'm a blm/sch,) Rutile is a paladin, and Porphy is a white mage/dancer (did you know that NIN is really high on the dance partner priority list?? :3c) it'd make more sense for the villagers to be disciples of the land/hand exclusively -- gneiss as a carpenter, porphy as a botanist, spinel as a fisher (lol), hal as probably an alchemist -- but this is already a crack crossover and I'm making the rules so everyone gets a disciple of war/magic even if they wouldn't need one

for party compositions and dynamics I will be brief bc this is so long already but light party one would be feldspar and gossan as DPS, hornfels as healer, and slate as tank OR feldspar as tank, slate and hornfels as DPS, and gossan as healer. light party 2 used to be Esker as tank, gabbro and chert as DPS, and riebeck as healer/esker and riebeck as DPS, gabbro as tank, and chert as healer (though the second config happens rarely). full party would be prooobably esker and slate on tank, riebeck and hornfels healing, and the rest on DPS. once the hatchling is trained they take esker's place -- esker is enjoying their quasi-retirement from adventuring for the most part but misses it sometimes and will step in to fill as necessary.

...oh god I have so many dark knights what happened--

[milo-is-rambling]

Omg yesterday at my moms therapy I said how well I had been doing and feeling like I can actually handle life and my mom was immediately like “that’s because you’ve been taking your meds regularly again” and like completely brushed off any progress I had actually made and I had to be like yeah totally that’s it that’s why exactly when I haven’t taken my meds for a week straight in idk how long

[hurricanek8art]

So! Update on my SWTOR woes! I figure putting it in the main tag makes it so everyone that helped me sees it. Thank you everyone for your advice! I was so nervous about asking and you guys are so cool!

I'm planning on just doing Voss and Corellia for now to keep from burning out! This is like attempt three at me making a Jedi Knight because I wanted her to be my Outlander and then I'd freeze up and panic because I wanted it to be "perfect" but y'know what? Perfect's overrated anyway, this is supposed to be fun! I'll keep the other planetary storylines on the backburner in case I need to level up any further, but since I hit level 50 before I was out of chapter one and I thiiiink I hit 54 last night finishing Maelstrom Prison, I don't think I need to worry about my level being too low for a while. 🤣🤣🤣

(side note—thank you so much @greyias I GOT THE STUPID WHATSHISFACE COLONEL GUY WITH THE EYEBEAMS FINALLY 🤣 I do not know why I didn't think of using those crates as a shield before, I am so dumb :P)

You guys were so helpful and nice and I don't know what else to say I'm so bad at this 🥴🤣 but thank you! All of this actually helped me work up the courage to maaaaaaybe share my stuff? At least screenshots and backstory rambles because I have to share it somehow. I can only yammer my brother's ear off about it for so long, and he's the only other person I know IRL that's as into all this as me, so y'know. 🤣 I might make a masterpost to introduce everyone but I gotta gather up all my screenshots first and I'm kinda meh about getting good ones, so :P we'll see. And condense about two and a half/three-ish years of my brain hurtling backstories at me faster than I can write when I'm supposed to be writing other stuff into readable paragraphs. Uh... yeah, maybe don't expect it too soon. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm queuing this for tomorrow because I only got the chance to actually sit down and write this at midnight here, it's been crazy. Thank you again, everyone! I'm so bad at social stuff I don't know what else to say but thanks!

I don't know how to end this, so uh... Here! Unnecessarily adding all my Republic side characters in because I love them and I constantly want to infodump when it's not the time or place! 🤣

Aja Verdona, my Jedi Knight; Reilly Hawkins, my Smuggler; Ataraxia Kestis, my Consular (and my smuggler's twin sister); and Ijaaka Ordo, my Trooper. They have permanently rewired parts of my brain and I love them all dearly even though I accidentally play favorites with Aja. 🥴

[bi-bats]

ALSO!!! i wanted to let you know that i placed The Echo Wife and Vicious on hold at the library on your recommendation and theyre gonna take a while to get to me but im excited to read them!!! so thank u for the recs in your response to one of my asks a bit ago!!! 💕💕💕

SKSJSJSJSJAKAK YESSSSS I LOVE THOSE BOOKS SO SO MUCH OH MY GOD 😭😭😭 VICIOUS IS SINCERELY ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVES AND THE ECHO WIFE IS ONE OF MY MORE RECENT FAVES BUT AKSJSJSJKSKA PLEASE DM ME ABOUT YOUR THOUGHTS WHEN YOU READ THEM I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THEM ALWAYS!!!

[rapha-reads]

Something that amuses me a lot as I write these essays, is that I write them in Spanish, the language* of the master's degree, but I often include quotes and references in English and in French - you know, if you're multilingual, take the hell advantage of it. But my word processor gets sooooo confused when in the same sentence there's Spanish words followed by French/English words, like, it doesn't know anymore, "what are we talking about, what correction should I give, what verifications should I make, aaaaaah, stop being insane!".

I am having a lot of fun.

*I literally wrote that "lenguage", like an insane mix of Spanish, English and French, wooow.

[the-hanged-mans-ghost]

vent-ish rambling in the notes ig bc I can't think and my brain is fuzzy but I have Thoughts

[lunar-fey]

so. the new adhd med now that i am on a normal starting dose and actually feeling it at all. it doesn't quite feel like i have adhd^2 like the other one did. like that one felt not dissimilar to a manic episode. was not great. THIS one though is like........i still feel like i have a lot of thoughts and a lot to say and gotta GO. but i also am finding it easier to stop or start or change directions. basically...........what if i was just a chatter the whole time but my brain was too fucked...............