#now im sad it never did this for hades like how much have i missed before now?? gdi

[misstalwyn]

so apparently nexus auto-detected hades 2 just so it could show me the greatest mod ever made:

[bestieriker]

i have thoughts about the pjo tv show but they might not be beloved... (long post, mostly just for myself but feel free to read my thoughts) (also lmk your thoughts! im curious if my experiences are universal) (also obv spoilers for ep8)

now i recognize i am watching this show through the lens of a much older person than i was when i read the books. percy is no longer older than me - he is now just a baby to me. and the actors are so young. so that might be the cause of some of my feelings. also i realize that a tv adaption is not going to be identical to the book. but what is tumblr if not a place to vent my frustrations, despite how irrational they may be?

i'll start with the good because there were some things i liked. i thought the actors mostly did a good job. the effects and sets and lighting and design was all very good, visually i think it was great. i like the gods i think theyre mostly well cast. I don't really have many problems with grover.

ok now lets talk about my frustrations. this isn't going to be super organized or logical. first of all, i had a problem with the characterization. most characters were actually not bad, but percy didn't really feel like percy to me. he seemed kinda darker? (whats he gonna be like when its dark!percy time??). like book percy obviously was not happy all the time, but he seemed light and he made jokes and he was a little goofier and i feel like in my mind he smiled more. tv percy kinda just seems sad all the time. and this might be a controversial take, but i feel like they gave some of percy's best traits to annabeth?? like annabeth was the one beefing with ares the most when he showed up. and a lot of the time she'd have a line that seemed so percy like!!! don't get me wrong - i love annabeth and the actress did a really great job! but i feel like she was kinda percy and annabeth at the same time in a way. i missed percy. also hades was different. they made hades fun which is cute but in the first book at least hes supposed to be kinda scary!!! i wasn't scared of hades at all. hades seems like he'd be a fun drinking buddy in this. those aren't the vibes hades should have, at least not at the first meeting.

ok next!!! where is the fun. pjo was such a fun series and i feel like the show has taken on more of a darker outlook! again i realize its a tv show and it was only an 8 ep run so they probably had time constraints, but i miss the fun little scenes that make the books such a fun read! like the "say hello to the poodle" scene ? or the scene where they're telling charon they died in a bathtub? and don't even get me started on the Crusty's bed scene. they just breezed right through that!!!

and thats another thing!!!! in the book they kept figuring things out while they were in the thick of it. which was fine!!! especially for percy - hes brand new to all of this, he has some knowledge but he makes mistakes because he's a kid and he is in a brand new world! and we get to see him and annabeth and grover get out of these tricky situations and figure things out!!! but in the show they know everything basically instantly. like the lotus casino or crustys scheme. i like seeing them make mistakes and fix it!! i don't think i was ever stressed watching this show (good stressed, like suspense stress) which i guess is in part because ive read the books but also because they were never in too terrible a position. and the kronos thing!!! percy knew right away. he was like oh word big pit? must be kronos. he did everything. like that is way too quick for early percy.

and then this is just me being nitpicky but i don't like how they changed things. like the luke betrayal reveal? where was the scorpion. that was so iconic and they just completely scrapped it! i thought it made luke's character kinda scary! like this guy fully just summoned a scorpion to kill percy. instead in the show hes like swinging at percy and percy manages to hurt him. i'm not scared of this luke. young percy, away from the sea, manages to hurt him? little annabeth scares him off? he runs away? ok big man try showing up again we won't be scared. idk it frustrates me.

one more thing before i wrap up the longest (and only) post i've made in ages. Sally Jackson using Medusa's head to turn gabe to stone was SO iconic. and what a great way for her to show us and the world and the gods how powerful she is. like she went from being sally jackson, mother and protector of percy (who was already pretty sick) to Sally Jackson, Capable of Basically Murder in a Super Cool Way!!!!!! i loved that. but in the show they just have gabe snooping and accidentally getting turned to stone? if i had never read the books and was watching this show with no knowledge of the books, i'd think it was just kinda a lazy way to wrap up a loose end. kinda felt like they took sally's power away (i know she divorced him but it doesn't really have the same gravitas).

ok i do have other thoughts but this is so long already and its bedtime. is it weird that i'm worried the younger cast might come across this? they probably won't care what i have to say but incase they do come across my super long post and read it (i would if i was 15 and starred in a show with a built in fanbase), i hope they take it with the biggest grain of salt. bc at the end of the day people like the show, its profitable (i assume), and i'm just a cranky old lady who doesn't like change. most of the changes i understand why they did it and i respect it. i'm just venting here. and you know what? if they release a second season (and third and fourth and fifth) i will be watching.

i guess i just wish they maybe had more episodes, or longer episodes, so they didn't have to rush it as much as (i felt) they did. overall it made people happy so who cares. have a good night tumblr.

[pastelpousay]

Hi again…I’m sure we all know what the hell this is for 😭💀

Sorry ik I keep coming on here about my stupid personal problems but lowk I think I might take another break I still wanna draw and write and stuff but that junior year depression hit me so hard I literally can’t rn 💀 I feel so isolated and alone and I feel like my friends hate me ( except for like one but still I don’t even get to see them cuz we have no classes together anymore.) I’ll still post art when I feel like it but I think the depression actually hit me so hard I don’t even care about how many people like my art anymore 💀 that’s saying a lot and school is not a help- I’ve felt like this for a while even before school but like at least I can write it off now I can’t and it’s literally only the second week 💀💀😭 this shit is sad as fuck.

So yea I might just go offline I hope to come back on here and I may like stuff every now and again and check in on some people but other than that idk I just feel so unmotivated I haven’t done much of any digital and the ones I did I hate or I just don’t feel like working on them, like I legitimately feel awful 😭 Hades and Rina is my only comfort it makes me so happy I love talking about them idk why I made it feel like such a job when literally no one gives a fuck about this shit but me. It’s why all my friends hate me, why everyone thinks I’m weird. And literally I already know no one in my school fucks with me they legit look at ppl like they’re some science experiment. This is basically a fucking repeat of last time but yea. I literally can’t it’s about to be my birthday and I feel so ass I’ll post for my birthday but that’s it I can’t do this anymore I love Hadina with all my might I want them to be real I wish they were I don’t understand why I have to here at school practically completely isolated I feel like I don’t have anyone anymore, like I don’t even feel important whatd the point do I even matter at all?? Like what if people just pity me or something idek why I care I feel so stupid saying this but I need to get it out and I can’t go to my friends because 1. I feel like most of them don’t like me 2. I’m so sick of them trying to reason with me I’m grateful for the help but it’s the same every time it feels insincere or like they don’t even care anymore. It lowkey might be karma but yea.

Sorry for the vent I don’t even know if I’ll leave I’m literally so desperate but I don’t even care. I miss when i started this blog when I was actually having fun and stuff now it just feels like I’m working I don’t want to do that it sucks all the fun out. I never complete any writing or anything and this is why. I hate school I hate everything about it.

OAKY AGAIN SORRY FOR THE VENT IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO STUPID

[rumpunch]

HIIII so… i finally got to see hadestown this weekend (the national tour production) w two of my best friends 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 i knew we were gonna see it for months but i didnt want to post abt it beforehand / acknowledge it in any way after making plans bc i was scared i would jinx it like what happened when i posted / talked abt seeing shows on the west end and then covid hit and sent me home lol. but i can’t believe i finally saw it!! it doesn’t feel real and honestly didn’t until right now as im writing this….. being in the theater was truly an out of body (and mind lol) experience for better or for worse. this was my first time seeing a show since covid and im soooo glad it was this one given how much it’s meant to me for all these years 🥹💗

i have a lot of thoughts on the production and also the plot / story so here they are lol:

production thoughts

for context ive never seen a hadestown 👢 before, i told myself that i wanted my first experience of seeing it to be actually seeing it in person. but ive listened to the obcr 5798673594 times over the last 3 years and the songs have become thoroughly woven into my life... so that made for a really weird experience where i knew every word but was watching it unfold for the first time and yet i knew what was coming for the most part. that also could be chalked up to the fact that ive seen so many gifsets and have read so many posts about other ppl seeing the show so i did know about some visual things.. but yeah it was just weird what i knew / expected and what i didnt lol

my friends and i sat in the back right corner of the mezzanine (like the LITERAL corner. no chairs behind us or next to us and the exit right next to us) and sadly the balcony in the set was cut off for us so we had to keep leaning across each other or scrunching our heads down to see the action up there :~/ but it was ok

i think bc of the above two bullet points + the fact that i really did not let myself believe that i was going to see the show bc i was scared of jinxing it + me having depression / possible derealization issues that i did not have when i first got into this show... i was kinda numb the entire time which sucks a little. i cried a couple times (happy / disbelieving tears in road to hell (persephone's entrance specifically for some reason, idk why it wasnt the "aight"s LOL) and any way the wind blows, sad tears in doubt comes in) but i didnt really... process anything in the moment or really experience the epic highs and lows of it while watching it. i just generally wasnt very moved! and im processing the show right now for the first time. and that kinda sucks and is unlike me and unlike what i thought seeing it was gonna be like. in a similar vein i found myself really focused on whoever was in the spotlight and im kinda mad at myself for that bc this is a show where SO many little details / context clues are communicated when ppl are in the background. but its fine i guess, i may be in a weird place mentally but i got to see it and maybe i'll see it again someday and be more moved

the cast was PHENOMENALLLLLL. j antonio rodriguez was our orpheus and he was the standout for me, his singing and acting as were breathtaking! i was frustrated about hannah whitley (eurydice) though bc like (and i feel bad for saying all of this)... nobody can be eva noblezada but hannah was missing a lot of notes / singing off key and kept like.. idk what the technical term for it is but she was kinda singing on her own beat and adding in a lot of pauses or rushing into things instead of staying on pace with the music and also she kept kinda revving up into the high notes and all of it grated on me. but i grew warmer to her singing in act 2 and i really appreciated her acting throughout! i didnt rly have many thoughts about hades (matthew patrick quinn), persephone (maria christina oliveras), or hermes (nathan lee graham) aside from ADORING all of their performances and what they brought to the roles compared to the obc! and the fates (dominique kempf, belén moyano, courtney lauster) / ensemble (kc dela cruz, colin lemoine, sean watkinson, shavey brown, raquel williams) / musicians were INCREDIBLE and had such amazing chemistry with and between each other :~D

antonio made for a bolder more charming orpheus and hannah made for a darker moodier more tortured eurydice which was interesting. but (and maybe this was just me dealing with the whole numbness / already knowing what to expect thing) i wasnt really convinced about their love story (specifically the early parts of it in act i as they were falling in love) or that orpheus in particular was insecure and vulnerable to the fates. but they did have some good chemistry in act ii especially and i was rooting for them so hard despite knowing wht was to come :~(

i knew that on broadway they have that little elevator in the center of the stage so i was curious about how it would work in the tour and... they had this giant oven box thing with moving doors! i actually really liked that, it made the whole idea of traveling to / from hadestown seem more sinister. that said i was kinda bothered by it during doubt comes in because orpheus and eurydice had to walk around the entire stage to make sure eurydice was positioned in front / inside of the oven and it kinda spoiled the ending in a way (even though we all know how that ends)... im guessing that on broadway its less exaggerated and you dont see it coming bc all eurydice has to do is just move over to the side a little. but idk i'll finally let myself watch a 👢 and see what the difference is

i couldnt take my eyes off of hades and persephone during promises. they started the song with hades kneeling with his head against persephone's stomach and then he stood up and they just hugged.... for a LONG time. like at least 3-5 minutes. and i was like god i wish that were me and i was thinking about what that mustve been like for the actors playing them.. like if thats a moment that they share and look forward to or whatever bc i know i would. it made me think about jenna's dear baby monologue in you matter to me LOLLLL

i saw from another post i read on here (as i was pregaming for the show by scrolling thru my hadestown tag LMAO) that orpheus runs through the audience at one point? and he didnt do that for us that i saw which i was bummed about. maybe thats just a broadway thing

i had no idea the set splits open during wait for me!!! it was so cool

i also didnt know / fully realize that hades produces a flower for persephone during epic iii 😭 the tears in my eyes... also speaking of epic iii hades singing the lalalalalalalaaaa got a LAUGH and i was so MAD!!!!! i get that its kinda funny because it just sounds so weird in his voice and its a startling moment... but that pissed me off bc the moment is supposed to be so tender and heartbreaking and the audience didnt appreciate that.. augh.

since its pride month the set was initially lit up with rainbow lights and in act ii hermes had little rainbow tassles on the ends of his sleeves!! :~D

plot / story thoughts

another context bullet point to kick us off: i discovered hadestown in the spring / summer of 2019 which was an INCREDIBLY formative time for me and so many aspects of the show (creative expression as a tool / forum for bringing about the world as it could be (and illuminating the possibilities in the world as it is), discovering that you have agency, love / loyalty / betrayal / sustenance, finding your purpose, etc.) were profoundly relevant to things that i was awakening to at that exact place and time in my own life. so i went into this experience hoping to have more insights like the kind i had when i first listened to the obcr... and i didnt really. i mean i had some but they didnt feel as profound i guess? and again that may just be me having mental health issues now that i didnt have then.. but that was a thing that i was aware of and kinda sad about. so yeah

that said... the main thing along those lines that i did take away (which really only hit me while watching epic iii / promises) is like... love is agency is love is agency is love.... or something like that. at least that they coexist and happen together. the oppressive conditions in hadestown and the poverty in the overworld strip the gods and humans alike of... their humanity (which is weird to apply to the gods but still)! their sense of self, and their love for each other and the world. the moment that became clear for me was in epic iii when the workers took off their goggles one by one and it was like.. they could See again! they could see themselves and each other, they were holding hands with each other and singing together. and they saw a future that they could create together. and hades was letting persephone dance and she kept spinning away from him with her arms outstretched like a bird but then coming back... idk. im not articulating this well and i need to think about it more and let it simmer for a bit and maybe watch a 👢 to get all the details. but it was like yeah... the opposite of capitalism imperialism etc etc is love and agency and they go together and they are the same thing.

another thing i need to think about more: orpheus went to hadestown all by himself to get eurydice! how come he was so confident then? he was LITERALLY alone. he didnt know where she went or if she would come back with him. and he didnt have the workers following him (though they were there in wait for me swinging the lamps, but i interpreted them as being like... part of the scenery i guess). he was completely alone and operating off of hope AND THE FATES TAUNTED HIM TOO and he was like... fine! so then in doubt comes in.. when he has all these people including eurydice following him... like idk. maybe its just because he'd confronted hades who couldnt fully be trusted and he knew that eurydice had turned her back on him and stuff... like maybe its just because on the journey back he'd experienced things that caused him to doubt / mistrust the people he was journeying with / from and that's what made him vulnerable, not so much the physical loneliness but the emotional loneliness that comes with a betrayal. which is something i just realized typing it out lol. but that kinda agitated me bc its like... he was FINE the way up so why did he crumble on the way back :~(

doubt comes in is such a fucking GUT PUNCH btw. i wanted to cry harder but didnt let myself bc i didnt want to be too loud or soil my mask. but i was so so scared to see it and it devastated me. its just so... SAD. and its so... like i relate to / identify with orpheus SO much yes in part because of the creative expression / seeing the two worlds thing but also because of doubt comes in specifically. its just so so so sad. he had all of these people including the person he loved most cheering him on and echoing to him. and he couldnt hear them. and he couldnt internalize how much they loved and believed and trusted in him. and he turned. that is so wrenchingly real. and it hurt so bad to see it playing out on the stage knowing what was about to happen and then WATCHING it in all the brilliant horror. like thats another insane thing the way the lights get so wildly bright. actually now that i mention that i think the lights are brighter in hadestown when bad things are happening. like hades saying I CONDUCT THE ELECTRIC CITY etc etc. that could be a whole post. someone should make that

im thinking a lot about The Song and whose song it is and actually WHICH song it is. bc if you think about it... so we're introduced to the lalalalalalalaaaa and whatever song that is which builds in the epics. and that song incites a lot of action like orpheus (quite literally!) tuning out eurydice which causes her to choose to go to hadestown, and hades realizing what love is and whatever. but another song that is equally if not more catalytic is.... IF IT'S TRUE!!!! bc thats the song that sparks the revolution among the workers and gives orpheus hope that he almost lost after learning about eurydice's betrayal and inspires eurydice to fight for something instead of succumbing to her fate. and in wait for me reprise when eurydice is singing "echoing OUR song" "the falling of OUR feet" ... like they're not alone as just the two of them, the workers are coming too!! so which song is she referring to! what if it's actually "if it's true" and the hopes that orpheus has stirred up about what the world could be?

btw speaking of orpheus tuning out eurydice... im sure this point has been made 5476463979 times but its rly interesting to think about how love languages (for lack of a better way to put it, ik that can be kinda reductive) work in this show. eurydice and orpheus both attempt to address the storm but the ways they choose to do it are different / dont align: eurydice tries to manage the short term by searching for food and firewood, while orpheus works on the song that will bring spring back and stop this kind of disaster from happening again. but iirc they dont talk about how they're going to take these two different but equally important strategies — eurydice at least interprets the song as being unimportant and orpheus just... straight up seems unaware of the food / firewood thing also being important. so theres a communication failure and eurydice interprets the silence as abandonment (for good reason, also relatable) and turns her back (ha!) on orpheus. and then with hades and persephone... hades does all these big flashy power gestures to show his love for persephone but it's the exact opposite of what she wants and they dont see eye to eye about how to express their love for each other either. yeah

speaking of eurydice making that choice... like yeah. sigh. betrayal is such a huge thing in this show. trust and betrayal. eurydice was (kind of) leading orpheus through the immediate short term danger of the storm and she turned on him. and the fact that she did was part of the reason orpheus turned on her. they made their vows in promises that they would walk side by side but he couldnt get over it (partially bc they literally weren’t allowed to physically walk as they planned but still). and eurydice said "im right behind you and i have been all along" and its like no you havent been thats the entire plot of the show lol (again for understandable reasons but still!)

another thing im sure has been analyzed 456456984 times but its interesting to think about hermes watching everything playing out while knowing how it will end and not choosing to intervene. idk what that means and my laptop is running out of battery so im not going to dig into it but im just thinking on it. BUT ALSO THAT GOES FOR US AS THE AUDIENCE like so many ppl probably know how it ends and maybe some ppl are seeing it multiple times and its like... anyone could intervene and change the story (within reason ofc). also goes for the other ppl on stage too like the musicians etc. its just interesting to think about the implications of that and what would happen if someone tried it both "in character" and "out of character" i guess

its interesting to think about the role walls play in the show too. like the wall hades is making the workers build to keep out the "enemy" and keep them (him) powerful and prosperous in their (his) isolation vs the walls repeating the falling of feet, echoing songs... letting people know theyre not alone. and the fact that that doesnt happen in doubt comes in even though orpheus is being followed by a whole crowd basically. idk. fascinating

ok those are all of my thoughts i think! i also saw some interesting posts / takes that im going to rb again bc theyre on my mind as i interpret the show but i dont want to put them in this post bc theyre not my original thoughts. ty for reading if you did :~D this is a glorious new era in rumpunch nation im so glad and grateful that i can finally say ive seen this beautiful show!

[miintsprigz]

Reblogging my own post to add onto it.

Things I specifically loved at the 4/28/24 Hadestown show. I knew the original myth and had heard a few pieces of the songs via TikTok, but this was my first time hearing it in full. I’m gonna go in soundtrack order because I’m tired now and I get order mixed up.

LONG POST BELOW and LET THERE BE SPOILERS!

-“AIGHT!”

-Eurydice is dressed in shorter overalls from the beginning and “always has the fates following her”…gosh don’t you hate it when Doomed, can’t even let this woman CANDLE in peace. she was always meant to go down there. And stay down there.

-I haven’t seen a SINGLE person talk about Yaya Reich’s version of Eurydice?! She’s excellent!!! I really love her hair, legit debated trying to style mine like hers

-I 100% understand what Eurydice sees in Orpheus. Gosh what a dork. I love him. I also 100% understand what Orpheus sees in Eurydice because HAVE I MENTIONED YAYA IS BEAUTIFUL

-Hermes gives me uncle vibes in the most comforting way imaginable.

-Persephone kinda gives me Tinkerbell vibes, the way she dances is so great. Woman EMBODIES life of the party.

-Her dance when Way Down Hadestown begins—she like bent at the waist, sort of shimmying side to side. It’s like she was being pulled down by Hades. So creepy, I love it.

-“I missed ya.” Philip Boykin’s delivery of that gave me Audrey II vibes.

-Orpheus visibly phasing in and out of Hadestown as he worked on the song…I’ve never seen a better representation of an artist getting completely swallowed whole by their work. The scared “is he always like this?” from Eurydice chilled me. Sometimes we’re in too deep…

-All these performers getting YEETED across the stage by the turntable/rotating stage/I dunno jargon was crazy. I would have fallen like 54 times.

-The way I audibly went “oh no” as Eurydice was pretty much attacked by the Fates. I see those three as the true villains here. Love it when your own mind tries to bite you.

-“Orpheus, I’m hungry…” the fact that Eurydice is so destitute for most of this show BREAKS MEEEE

-The intro to “Wait For Me” will never not frick me up. “Where is she…?”

-I didn’t know how to feel about Eurydice choosing to go down to Hades. But with what little we know of her past, it makes some good sense to me. She’s used to moving when the going gets tough and people left her a lot. Sure, Orpheus was different, but one person isn’t enough to change a lifelong foundation of behavior, and when people are stressed they’re even more likely to fall into old behaviors…I’m getting too psychoanalytical oops.

-The set BREAKING APART when Orpheus sings that melody. My gosh, I felt my mouth drop open. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. The staging of this whole song was awesome.

-I know now that “there’s a crack in the wall!” in “our lady of the underground” is meant to be a peep show but seeing her reach up for the light made me kind of sad. Like she’s trying to reach and touch the world she loves.

-“Flowers” is one of the most underrated songs in this show, PERIOD. I got REKT. The fact that she REMEMBERS ORPHEUS’ KINDNESS EVEN THOUGH SHE FORGOT BOTH THEIR NAMES. NO IM NOT OK

-The gags in Come Home With Me (Reprise) had me rolling honestly. “No I walked” (points to aisle)

-The fight scene during Papers was genuinely super cool to me.

-“Nothing Changes” makes me think this show could really be used as a lesson not to let the cruel and twisted voices in your mind result in you leading to a tragedy by your own actions/inactions at times…but don’t get down on yourself for what you did before you knew better.

-If It’s True is CRUSHING. EMOTIONAL DAMAGE!

-Kinda got irked that Orpheus almost gave up here, but to be fair, this dude just got 1.) beaten up 2.) EMOTIONALLY DUNKED ON by hades. Probably the worst day of his life.

-“How Long?” Having them stand on either side of the hole, with O, E, and the workers going down in there…it’s like the riot is driving a wedge between the two of them. And ya know, sometimes you gotta tear it all down before you can rebuild.

-YOUNG MAAAAN GOT TA HAND IT TO YA—

“Keep your head” takes on a different meaning—don’t let them get inside your head, “take” your head…”keep” it, keep YOURSELF!

-Me: “the Epic is probably gonna be cheesy.”

Me after Epic III: “cheesy? Yeah a little. Still stunning? YEEAAAAH”

-The fact that the Fates themselves fall in line during Epic III, and follow the other characters for once. I know they were canonically probably biding their time, but I like to think Orpheus’ song was so good on this run that he BENT FATE TO HIS WILL. And that’s why, even though this has been a never-ending loop, Persephone comes down for springtime! He DID change something, he BENT FATE. HEAR. ME OUT.

-Hades’ shaky singing. Listen, he���s done bad stuff but I just thought “aw buddy”…

-Hades’ goofy dancing made him a lot more likeable to me.

-Idk why, I wasn’t big on Promises or Wedding Song as a whole—not like I hated em, I loved this whole show, those songs just didn’t light my brain up as much. I’m a lunkhead, so that doesn’t mean much. Don’t listen to me—

-The fact that HADES HIMSELF is swayed by the Fates—the Fates are literally responsible for driving (albeit not causing, note the difference) every single bad thing that happens—Eury going down, Hades making the catch, Orph TURNING—COME ON. Great theme that no one is without flaw.

-Personally, I love how done Hermes is with this plot from Hades. You can see how sick he is of seeing this same exact thing happen again and again.

-Again, Hermes tells it like it is. The doubt, the insecurities of the cast, they’re the real “villain” here. Not the gods. The sadistic Fates. And the fact that people can’t HELP but listen.

-Wait For Me Reprise is great. Send tweet.

-The staging for the walk up is great. The mist, the complete blackness representing the inner mind of Orpheus.

-The fact that The Fates PHYSICALLY get in between Orpheus and Eurydice. What a great visual metaphor. She’s talking to him the whole time and HE CANT HEAR HER!!! Because they’re held so much closer than even his love. He’s not doing it on purpose, it’s just human nature.

-There’s a whole group with her too, I swear the ensemble choir here comes through with this message of the people you surround yourself with rubbing off on you (like E dancing with them in Living It Up) but there comes a point where you get so drowned in your own thoughts that even a whole crowd can’t reach you…

-People have suggested Orpheus’ wavering could have to do with him literally losing himself from all the time he’s spent in Hadestown. He didn’t sign his soul away, so I know it doesn’t really count, but…I could kinda see it.

-I knew, I KNEW what was coming. And I was STILL HORRIFIED. The way she GASPS. The immediate relief that changes to horror as he realizes his desperation to see if she was really there is her ultimate doom. The woman he loved more than anything, and he’s sent her to her demise, once, twice, and FOR GOOD. All with the best intentions. They do indeed pave the road to hell.

-The ending positions. He’s forever looking down. Head down in despair. Unable to see the world as it could be anymore. And her? She’s just GONE.

-Jon Jon’s Hermes looked so DONE. His “aight?” Sounded like “okay, kiddo. You didn’t get it this time either. But it’s okay, because I’m going to keep singing it until you get it.” I was concerned they’d go right into the same opening version, knowing that would jolt me right out of immersion. That did NOT happen.

-Man I wanna give this whole cast a big hug. They want a happy ending so bad, and so do I. I’m gonna keep singing. Let’s all keep singing. Maybe one day, Orpheus won’t turn around. See the world for what it could be, in spite of the way that it is.

Raise a cup. For the Orpheus in all of us. Who will turn, again and again, but we keep on singing. Keep on weaving our masterpieces, trying to heal our world, and maybe, maybe one day, heal ourselves.

Okay it’s 1am, I need to sleep. Thank you for reading.

Just want to say I saw Hadestown for the first time tonight and I LOVED IT!

[percyjacksonfan3]

The Last Olympian Thoughts

So because I have absolutely 0 self-control or restraint when it comes to this series and its characters, and for The Last Olympian in particular, I could not put TLO down. Because of this I figured I couldn’t do the usual photo reaction posts I have been so far, because the spam would just be ridiculous, so I am stealing the idea from @yourstrulytaaay​ to do a masterpost instead. (Adding a Read More cause this got ridiculously long)

Fun fact, TLO came out right after i finished reading the series for the first time so it's the first PJO book i bought  and my only hard cover one for the og series. I checked the year and turns out it was published 2009, which means i was actually 9 when i read the series for the first time. I realize this is not really a fun fact but i thought i was older when I first read the series so it's blowing my mind a little ‘cause now I’m 21 and everything hits different and i still have so much love for this series and the characters Okay onto book thoughts: - i was right that this book is gonna destroy me, the first line alone made me so excited and nostalgic it's ridiculous - I love Rachel and Percy sm tbh. Her being a bit of peace and normalcy in his life without always reminding Percy of who and what he is is so good for him. Just a little escape

- of course by the end of the book that's not the case any more but by the end he's lived his prophecy so he doesn't need it as badly, plus he and Annabeth are solid again - Percy saying Annabeth has been hard to be around lately... Ouch my heart. Luke really is the last thing that keeps them from being together and Percy is so jealous and Annabeth so torn and in pain, i feel so bad for them both

- Beckendorf 🥺🥺 - the telkhine with the Lil Demon lunchbox!! I forgot about him. Percy: 'i left him alive, partly because his lunchbox was cool' is one of my absolute favourite lines tbh - Paul taking Percy crabbing and being imperative in helping Percy kill the giant crab 💖 Paul Blofis is important and deserves the world, okay? - aw Percy, you can't save every demigod bb

- 'i had to fight him eventually. Why not now?... What difference would a week make?' Oh Percy you have no idea - real talk tho, the fact Kronos possessed Luke's body would also mess me tf up. Percy keeps forgetting it's not Luke anymore and yeah, that would be so so hard and confusing af, like what another smart little mind game for Kronos to pull on top of everything else - the fact Percy fights Kronos before getting the Achilles Curse and actually doesn't die within seconds is... Astounding. He kicks him in the chest! And yeah Kronos is weaker and still adjusting to Luke's body, but Percy is having trouble fighting Luke cause they used to be friends - Percy breaks Kronos' time magic!! Like?! Boy is POWERFUL.

- OUCH - honestly Luke, Thalia and Annabeth's family breaking the way it did... Don't talk to me. Poor Annabeth, Luke betrayed them, Thalia joined the Hunters because of Luke's betrayal so she's pretty much AWOL all the time and then Luke dies. Like Rick wtf, my heart can't take it? -Percy and Tyson having each others backs when talking to Poseidon in the underwater palace is the brother-brother relationship we love to see - Percy trying to stick a sand dollar in the vending machines at school 🤦🏻‍♀🤦🏻‍♀ - the whole underwater interaction at Poseidon's palace? Perfection. Awkward family drama and all - Connor falling out of the tree when he sees Percy because he's so excited 😂😂

- 😭💖

- k, ik Clarisse isn't perfect but tbh if i was a child of Ares whose father was disrespected and hated by my fellow campers (ares deserves it but still) and that disrespect trickled down to how the other campers treated ME (which if Percy is reliable here, it obviously does) then i would also be irritated at being used for muscle and nothing else? And just expected to fight with the people who act as if they'd rather not have Ares kids around the rest of the time. Like Clarisse isn't totally wrong - Percy reading the prophecy, seeing he's meant to die and just being like 'i do not see it' and refusing to outright think about it makes me so sad for him - (but it taints every action after and he's super reckless afterwards bc of it- including finally breaking and accepting the Achilles Curse) - (also him taking this as the last straw and finally beginning to show Annabeth how he really feels, cause fuck it, he's dying anyway) - Give me more info about Rachel's backstory and family Rick!! -  how did i forget Percy willingly eats chocolates that taste like cardboard because 'i didnt have anything against cardboard' like sir? Ik Silena didn't want them but still? - 'she'd always been cute, but she was starting to be seriously beautiful' STOP, MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT - Percy staring at Annabeth and forgetting what they're talking about cause hes so distracted 👌🏻

- hmm yeah... For some strange reason.... - i forgot how Percy totally bombs this convo bw them and now want to cry 😭 Annabeth is trying to talk about what's important and Percy, you sweet oblivious man, you're shooting her down without even realizing - love that they're both on the same wavelength tho. Percy two lines before, hmm it's cool to date ppl from other cabins, wonder why im thinking that around Annabeth, my best friend in the world, and then Annabeth a beat later, hmm, let me bring up Silena and Beckendorf and how it's important to be with the people you love when you have the chance, no way Percy will miss this huge hint right? - they're the best - k i honestly forgot Percy full on physically intimidates Leneus like that - luke telling his mom if he ran away the monsters wouldnt get her..i can just imagine luke crying when he says good bye before running away because he thinks it's his fault his mom is like that and he cant take care of and protect her anymore because it's too hard - uh oh now i have angsty pre-lightning thief luke fic inspo... Him, Thalia and Annabeth on the run... The ANGST -  Rick holds absolutely nothing back in this book and i am in pain - HESTIA!! 💖💖🥰 - actual loml - i love that Rick titled this book after her and that he wrote such a great series about the importance of family (biological, found or otherwise) and home, and that he said actually Hestia is the most important bc shes the most humble and keeps the peace and knows when to fight and when to yield and you protect what you love, which is your home - i just... Adore Hestia - Grover! Missed you babes - Hades is so so horrible to Nico, always comparing him to Bianca :/ - but i do love Hades, Persephone and Demeter together they make me laugh - oh god the River Styx - Achilles 🥺 - Annabeth being Percy's lifeline is, and continues to be, A Lot™ - 'my name was Percy Jackson. I reached up and took Annabeth's hand.' LOL Why am i crying? - Like the fact there is no Percy without Annabeth, and that remembering her literally reminded him of who he is in his very soul... It's fine im fine - i won't even get into the parallels of her being his lifeline now and then later when Hera takes his memories but leaves the memory of Annabeth for Percy to fight to get back to (anyone who wants to yell about it with me... Feel free to message) - badass Percy is my fav Percy tbh - him defeating Hades?? Like? Hades is arguably the most powerful god, okay - i feel bad for Nico but if i was Percy I'd do the exact same, Nico, sorry man but this is a high stakes time crunch deal and Nico is literally the only hope of persuading Hades and distracted by his own internal stuff - flashbacks to Luke, Thalia and Annabeth hurt, ow - George and Martha are the best - damn i forgot Hermes full on nearly kills Percy here, yikes - Luke stop cockblocking Percabeth challenge

- i love!! Percy's love for New York!! So much!! - Percy leaving to live in New Rome in HoO is a lie and this is all the proof i need for why - the fact the entire last half of the book is the battle and aftermath... Such great buildup and pacing. All the tricks and twists and battles in this War of Manhattan? I would not take out a thing, Rick, you legend - of course then the final battle in hoo with the gods is what? Two pages? Ugh, don’t talk to me about my hatred for BoO and HoO - 'no detours you two' is still the cutest thing!!! - THE HUNTERS!! Thalia i missed you - good job Percy, you finally spent your sand dollar - Minotaur!! - 'dont i get a kiss for luck? Its kind of a tradition right?' Percy finds out he's gonna die and is out of fucks to give and honestly I support him - also Michael just standing beside these two while they're flirting like umm 👀 👀 while a monster army marches towards them, nbd - Annabeth taking Ethan's knife meant for Percy!!! Cause she just knows his weak spot without him even telling her! They literally invented love - Feral Percy is so scary omg, i love how well Rick incorporates the Achilles Curse in this novel, with the whole heightened weaknesses and stuff ans the parallels to Achilles arrogance being what killed him and Percy's loyalty, fierceness and protective instinct being his own heightened weakness - the fact that Percy is the one who inadvertantly kills Michael Yew tho, I'll never recover from that - the fact Hades offers Maria di Angelo a golden palace by the Styx like how Poseidon offers Sally a palace under the sea tho. Let's talk about that parallel - the entire talk with Prometheus is so so good - not me picturing young Luke hiding in the closet to get away from his mom when she has an 'episode' -i love callbacks in stories and all of the callbacks to the rest of the series in this book make me very happy (medusa, minotaur, the underworld, Rainbow!! My baby!!, Daedalus and more) - Percy summoning a wholeass hurricane against Hyperion - the Party Ponies! They're so chaotic, i love it - Dionysus! 😁 I can't help it, i love him - Percy absolutely losing it when he sees Sally and Paul asleep in the car 🥺 - Rachel telling Percy he's not the hero screws with him so much :( poor bb - although i really really love how Rick wrote this, it's so refreshing to not have one chosen one save the world, but a combination of people - the drakon, Silena and Clarisse make me cry - the Patrochilles references, im not okay - Annabeth giving up on Luke after hearing what he did to Silena and Percy telling her that doesn't make him happy 😭 that whole interaction makes my heart ache - Percy giving Hestia Pandora's pithos 🥺 - and Hades, Nico and the others coming for a final attack is so badass, i love it - listen im glad the og trio were the ones to confront Luke on Olympus but the fact Thalia got so close and then pinned by a statue of HERA makes me so sad. Ik her and Luke were finished and she coped by cutting him off completely and giving up all hope but i would pay money to know what they would have said to each other to say goodbye - Ethan 🥺 - Poseidon joining the fight against Typhon is so cool, such a great scene - 'PEANUT BUTTER!' - Annabeth you brilliant badass you - RIP Luke, you werent great but you werent the worst either - the gods just rolling up seconds too late, wondering wtf happened in Olympus and who the dead body is - the chapter where the Olympians meet and give out rewards is one of my absolute favourites (again i am incensed we didn't get anything like this in HoO) - will Percy turning down immortality ever not make me scream in glee? No? Alright then - Annabeth being relieved like Percy was relieved at the end of Titan's Curse tho - oh Hermes :/ - its so hard reading all this and knowing what comes in HoO... Like it's such a cathartic, earned and mostly happy and peaceful ending and then HoO comes along and undermines it all - aww Rick let Paul see Olympus somehow pls, he deserves it, he killed a dracanae - (i would also love to see it) - Percy being more upset Rachel took his pegasus than her going to Camp and possibly dying, lol, priorities dude - i honestly think that Rick had other ideas for the second Great Prophecy and how things would go down in BoO, cause the prophecy like... Barely applies to BoO, Doors of Death are in book four, and explabations of it is all so unclear when Rick is usually pretty good with that stuff - PERCABETH - lol Percy complaining about privacy when he and Annabeth are caught kissing literally in the middle of the very open and public dining pavilion, okay - BEST UNDERWATER KISS OF ALL TIME - that's it and im a glass case of emotion - very happy to say that this series remains my favourite of all time 💖

 If anyone ever wants to come gush about anything Riordanverse related feel free, because as you can see I have a lot of thoughts about it all

[perseusjackson-jasongrace]

Angst 1 for Jason? I'm feeling like some sad lightning boi I dont know why but ye

Hello darling Anon! Thanks for the prompt and I hope I did you well🥺 dis is hella angsty

Jercy Masterlist

Jason Grace doesn't have enough fingers to list how many things he's done wrong in the last month.

1. Losing his best friend

2.Losing his girlfriend

3.Being unable to help all the demigod's he's promised

4.Letting Reyna down by not coming back to SPQR

5.Dammit he can't even put on his fucking shirt the right way.

Holding in a scream he tugs it off and flips it so the tag is on the inside. He's proud of himself for not ditching clothing altogether, ditching life altogether. There is so much temptation in taking to the skies and floating for the rest of his days. It's not like anyone would miss him, would even notice he was gone. And maybe it's for the best. It certainly wouldn't be unexpected. For years he's wanted to be anonymous, just another one of the Campers. For years he's secretly rejected his titles as Son of Jupiter, Praetor of New Rome, Slayer of the Black Throne. He shouldn't complain now that he's ignored, unwanted.

There's a knock at his cabin that he pulls him out of his self-deprecating pity hour. Checking to make sure he has his pants and shirt on and his head firmly on his neck he grabs his sword and opens the door.

"Jason!" Will Solace gasps, "Please come it's Nico!"

His heart turns to stone, lungs become useless masses, "Let's go." He manages to breathe, "Brief me on the way."

They sprint through the camp, uncaring of the shouts and greetings coming from every side. They don't have time. It seems ever since they had defeated Kronos the clocks spin uncontrollably; hours are seconds and minutes only exist in the afternoon and nobody knows if one week is seven days or three blinks of an eye, if years are twelve months or a century.

"A breach at the west border. Monsters we've never seen before. They just snuck up on us. Nico's been raising the dead to fight but I'm afraid he's not strong enough yet. Not after the war. He'll burn out soon and they'll overwhelm him." Will gasps.

"How many?"

"Twenty maybe twenty five?"

"You call anyone else?"

The Son of Apollo shakes his head as they sprint around the corner, "Percy is in school he only arrives tomorrow. Clarisse is gone to visit her mom and there's so many Campers in the infirmary. The rest are the little ones."

"How fa—" Jason beholds the scene in front of him and every nerve in his body shut down.

There in the middle of skeletal warriors and black shadows is Nico Di Angelo. All around them are scaly four-legged vipers hissing and spitting. One opens its grossly enormous jaw and snaps it around a skeleton with a sickening crunch. Another skeleton pops up in the exact same place and with a rattling, he supposes is a scream, attacks the monster.

"NICO!" Will screams, trying to catch his boyfriend's attention.

The Son of Hades although dangerously powerful is grey and heaving as if the sheer force of his summonings are turning his own body to it's bony structure.

"Go!" Will shouts at him.

With a nod, Jason pulls his sword out and steps into the ring of the dead.

Gods these things are a hundred times more terrifying up close. Sharp teeth and poisoned spikes on their tales and oh gods jagged claws to top it all off. But he's fought armies before and survived. This will not deter him. So with the force of Zeus and the strategies of Jupiter flowing through his muscles he brings his sword down on the first creature.

It shrieks and his ears ring like a bell clanging in his skull. But the head thumps to the ground and the monster crumbles to dust.

Decapitation then.

He sidesteps the swish of a tail, chopping it off as it goes past. First mistake. Three tails grow back and he knows one drop of poison will be enough to end him. He vaults into the air using the wind to push him as high as possible and then he's slamming in the body of the creature and sawing at its head.

His foot slams into the ground as the monster powders underneath him. Second mistake. His ankle is broken and there's three more of these things advancing towards him.

He bites down a scream as he attempts to walk. It's no use. Stand here and fight it is. Summoning as much lightning as he can, blue eyes sparking maliciously, he looks directly into the first of them and slams five thousand volts of electricity into its brain. Before he knows it's dead he's onto the next. This time he bides his time, let's it come closer and when he can hear its ugly breathing and feel its lack of heat he stabs his sword into its neck and watches it bleed black.

The third monster is clever, it's learnt. But Jason doesn't know. So he gathers all his strength and waits for it to pounce. By now Nico is a few meters away, holding his own but pale beyond healthy. The monster shakes its body, scales rippling in the afternoon sun. It takes one step closer. Jason grips his sword, holds the power thrumming in his fingers. The monster moves again and he swears its smiling.

He turns to Nico, "You good?"

Third mistake. The monster let's out a vile screech and slams into them.

"NICO!" Someone screams. It sounds like Percy Jackson. But that can't be right. Percy is in school.

The creature's tail swipes at the Son of Hades.

Jason can't move as it's claws wrap around his throat.

I can't do anything right, he thinks. Those talons pierce his skin. The world goes black.

***

"He's a fucking idiot."

"Lay off. How was he supposed to know?"

"Maybe if he wasn't so caught up in trying to make friends he would have been able to do something."

"Leave him alone."

"Alright you lot, get out of here. I'll call you when he's awake."

Jason tries to open his eyes, tries to say something, anything. But he feels a prick in his neck and reality fades away.

***

"Is he awake?"

"How long does this take?"

"He had a broken ankle and a slit throat. Maybe a little patience is in order?"

"I still think we should send him back."

"That's enough! It wasn't his fault and we will stop acting like it.".

The Son of Jupiter groans, blinking into the world. Everything hurts. Everything. And the light above his head is blinding.

"What the hell happened?" He rasps.

"You almost got Nico killed is what!" Someone snaps.

He blinks trying to find the source of such bitterness. "I what?"

"What the fuck were you trying to do saying hi in the middle of battle?"

The room finally shifts into focus and he sees three faces staring at him intently, varying degrees of anger and relief in their expressions.

"Well?" Hazel looks at him, "What were you trying to accomplish? Were you actively trying to get him killed? I know you didn't trust him but trying to kill him Jason? I thought you got passed that after Cupid. Nico told me he trusted you."

"Hazel!" Percy Jackson glares at her.

"I'm—" He chokes, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to make sure he was okay. I— I didn't know the monster would try to get both of us." He's crying now, red hot tears spilling onto the white sheets of the infirmary bed.

"That's the problem Grace, you don't think." There is so much pain in her voice.

"Im sorry," He sobs, "Is he okay? Is he— is he—"

"He is fine Jason," Will says softly, "He managed to jump back before the tail swiped him. He's actually really worried about you. We all are."

He doesn't know what to say to that. He doesn't even know if he deserves that. Hazel is right. If he hadn't distracted Nico they wouldn't be in this situation. It was dumb luck that Nico managed to get out of the way. If he hadn't. Oh gods, Jason would have been responsible for killing his friend.

With that though he turns over in his bed and heaves straight into the trashcan.

"Everyone leave us." Percy's voice is soft, but there is an unmistakable command in it.

The buzzing of the infirmary hushes as people file out and Will gently clicks the door behind him.

"I didn't meant to distract him," Jason cries.

The Son of Poseidon clasps their hands together and looks into him, "I know Jase. I know."

He breaks down, sobs wracking his aching body. He can't even keep his head up. And the tears are ever flowing. He can't breathe, he can't breathe, he can't do this.

Percy hops onto the bed and takes him into his arms. They sit there for many moments, the sound of his crying disrupting every inch of the silence.

"I can't do this anymore Percy."

He feels the demigod stiffen and he's afraid he said too much, has pushed another person away. But then his head is being tilted up by a soft hand and he's looking into oceans.

"Tell me what's wrong."

"There is no-one left and I cannot do this alone."

Something sparks in those emerald green eyes.

"You have never been alone Jason Grace. When the world is dust and the gods can once again become mortal, you will find that only one thing still exists."

"What— what is that?" He hiccups.

"Love. You cannot be alone if you have love."

His eyes pool with tears, fall to the floor, "Lies. There is no love."

"You have forgotten my friend what it feels like. And that is no one's fault but ours. We should have been there. Should have helped you, seen the signs. I should have known."

"Why you?"

"Because I know what it's like to have everything you've never wanted and bear the burden anyway. And when I left I added to yours. I'm sorry for that. I got selfish, wanted to know what it was like to live. But that meant you suffered."

"It's not your fault. I just thought I was stronger than I am."

"You are strong. You are so strong because you are still here. You took the nature of the gods and made it your own. Took the burden of everyone in these camps and carried it on your shoulders."

"Thank you," He mumbles, getting lost in the seas, "For saying that. When did you get so philosophical and wise?"

Percy cracks a grin at that, "After Tartarus I started going to therapy. I think you should too."

He mulls it over, flips the idea around in his mind, "Okay."

"And maybe..." The black haired boy pauses, "Maybe you should come with me to Montauk for the winter holidays. I think you could use a break from all the hero stuff."

"Really?" His eyes widen, staring at his friend.

"Really. Annabeth is in Cali to spend time with her dad and my mom and Paul are just going to spend some time at home with Estelle. I could use company."

"Won't you dad like blast me for being in his territory?"

"I'll talk to him," He smirked.

"Okay. That would be great!"

Percy gives him another squeeze and then jumps to the floor.

"Rest easy Grace."

"Jackson," He stops the demigod in his tracks, "Thank you for this. I needed it."

"We are alive Grace, and we are enough." Those green eyes are intense, filled with emotion. "Remember that."

Jason nods and when he finally succumbs to sleep once more, his soul takes a deep breathe and exhales a new beginning.

[descendantofthesparrow]

Harry Hook x reader - regret

anon request

If requests are open, could you do some kind of writing about how Harry would react to Ireader saying she’s pregnant, how he would be throughout the pregnancy and birth, and how he’d act when first holding his baby, you can choose the gender. Could you make it angsty to the max with a fluff overload at the end? You as your worms are amazing!! Hi, same person with the pregnant reader. Could you start their relationship out as him ‘graciously’ (he just wants to kiss her) teaching her how to kiss? And i meant to say your works are amazing too, along with you yourself. Okay, that’s all I’m gonna ask you, sorry if this is bothering you.

“never have I ever been…kissed” most of the group laughed, taking a drink, all except you. Uma turned raising her brow “(y/n)?”

You gave a shy smile, shrugging “I've never been kissed” you didn’t notice gil wiggling his brows at harry, who turned red.

You sighed, looking at the clock on the wall and standing. “its late, im going to go to bed, night”

“night” the crew called after you, you sighed as you walked to your room, stepping out onto the main deck of the lost revenge.

You stopped, looking towards Auradon, the shine from the lights making you feel sick.

“so ye have never been kissed eh?” you turned slightly, harry stepping out from the darkness of the lower-deck, you shrugged.

“no ones ever expressed interest in doing so” you muttered, leaning on the rails. Harry felt his chest clench, you sounded so sad.

He had to fix it.

“well,” he grinned, walking over and leaning next to you “I could teach ye? So when someone does want ta kiss ye they’re not disappointed?”

You made a face, slightly offended, turning to harry and glaring at him “what is that supposed to mean?!” Harry's flirty grin dropped, his brows furrowing.

“wait no that no-“ you huffed, turning to walk away when Harry's arm reached out and grabbed your arm, turning you around to face him.

“that wasn’t-I didn’t mean- fuck im sorry” you kept your glare and crossed your arms. “I wanted to-wanted ta….fuck can I kiss ye?”

Your eyes widened and your shoulders dropped, tilting your head as your face heated up “wh-what?”

“can” Harry took your hands in his, shyly biting his lip “can I kiss ye?” you blushed, slowly nodding. Harry grinned, pulling you in and pressing his lips to yours.

Your heart fluttered, your eyes closing and your arms wrapping around his neck as he wrapped his arms around your waist and lifted you up.

“wanna take this into meh room?” you gasped and nodded, harry carrying you into his room.

And that’s how you two got together, and now, two and a half years later you stared at the little pink and white stick, with two lines staring back at you.

You were pregnant.

And you were terrified of how Harry would react, yet so happy to know that within you was a perfect mix of you and harry.

God, you hoped harry would be as excited as you were

=

“yeh have ta get rid of it” your heart shattered, tears burning at your eyes as you watched harry pace the room, the little pink stick in his hands, cracking from his grip. “w-what?” your voice shook, flinching as harry whipped around to face you.

“you have to get rid of it!” he yelled “the isle is not a place for kids and frankly I don’t want one of those gremlins, this place is full of them already!”

You took a step back, carefully watching his arms and hands, your own going to cover your stomach.

“but-but”

“BUT NOTHING” harry snarled, chucking the stick at the wall, it shattered at the impact, you squeaked in fear, back hitting the wall. “I DON’T WANT THE DAMN THING AND IF YOU DON’T GET RID OF IT I WILL!”

You saw his eyes look towards his hook and you stood and bolted out of his room, sobbing as you raced off the deck and ran as far as you could, missing Uma calling out to you.

Uma watched as your form became smaller, she snarled, turning to see harry, hook in hand, staring off in the distance.

“WHAT!” Uma snarled, storming up to harry and pulling him down to her height “THE FUCK DID YOU DO!” harry huffed, pushing umas hand off his shirt.

“shes pregnant and I told ‘er to get rid of it” umas face dropped and paled...

“YOU DID FUCKING WHAT?!” harry jumped, frowning in concern when he saw just how horrified uma was.

“wha-what's wrong?”

“you-“ Uma muttered, stating yo pace around the deck, holding her head in her hands “you really are fucking- you really don’t know- my god you fucking idiot”

“uma” harry interrupted her “what are ye talking about?”

“YOU BASICALLY TOLD HER TO KILL HERSELF YOU DOLT!” harry turned white, his eyes seeming to shrink in shock “wha-what-ah!”

Uma stomped up to him and harshly poked him in the chest. “DON’T YOU FUCKING KNOW THAT THE ABORTION TECHNIQUES HERE ARE EXTREMELY DANGEROUS?! ITS SAFER FOR HER TO CARRY THE BABY FULL TERM OR HAVE A MISCARRIAGE THAN TO ABORT IT, WE DON’T HAVE ANY REAL MEDICAL TOOLS REMEMBER?! IT WOULD KILL HER FROM AN INFECTION OR BLOODLOSS!!!”

Harry sunk to the floor, tears burning at his eyes, and….he had threatened his love to do it himself, his shaky hand released his hook, the metal clanging as it hit the floor.

“NOW SO HELP ME HADES IF YOU DON’T FIND HER AND APOLOGIZE I WILL JAM MY FIST, ALL DICK AND BALLS UP YOUR SCROTUM!”

Harry shakily got to his feet, wiping the still dripping tears from his cheeks, nodding to his captain.

“yeah, im-im sorry cap’n” uma growled, and he flinched from the roar of waves crashing against the ship.

“you better be, now bring her back, I would hate to be down a quartermaster AND a first mate.” Uma turned in a flourish, her hair whipping around behind her.

Harry glanced at his hook, deciding to put it back in his room, he didn’t want to make (y/n) think he was actually going to do it himself.

A few minutes later, he rushed off into the settling smog of the isle, his classic red jacket in his hands, he needed to find (y/n) and fast, who knows what would happen to her…to them while out on the cold isle night.

=

Your chest hurt, it hurt so bad, you could feel your heartbreaking, you could understand why Harry didn’t want a kid, the isle was no place for one, even if there were already over a hundred on here already.

But the way he had said it….god you just wanted to hide away from him forever, you had never seen him so angry, so…cruel…he was truly like his father.

You didn’t hear footsteps draw near, didn’t bother to notice someone near you till a heavy coat draped over your shoulders. You gasped, covering your midsection, looking up to see sad ocean blue eyes.

“im so sorry” Harry's voice cracked, he fell to his knees in front of you, bowing his head to his chest, making his self smaller. “im so sorry, I shouldn’t have said any of those things, im sor-“ he sobbed, reaching out slightly to press his hand on your waist “im so sorry, I can't lose yeh, im so sorry”

You rubbed your snotty nose on your sleeve, leaning forward into Harry's arms, who sobbed and held on to you tightly.

“i-“ you croaked “I understand why you don’t want kids it's just…harry it would kill both of us in the process to well..you know?” harry sniffed, pulling back slightly and nodding.

“Im sorry, im such an idiot, I should know about this shit, when I have two sisters, I was ignorant and im sorry, forgive me?”

You sniffed, wiping off your tears and snot, giving a shy nod “yes, but never do that again hook, first and final warning”

Harry sagged in relief, wrapping his arms around you and holding you to his chest.

“thank yeh lassie, I promise, ill take care of both of yeh to the best of my ability”

=

Facilier had kicked him out, apparently, he was too “panicky” to be in the room with (y/n), apparently, he would only stress out (y/n) more!

But now he was even MORE panicky!!!!! And now he had Gil holding him down, preventing him from bursting back into the room.

Docter's orders.

Two hours later, Uma opened the door with Facilier walking out. She smiled and gestured for Harry to come in, holding a finger in front of her mouth.

Harry walked in silently, tears streaming down his face as he caught sight of his daughter.

Pale pink cheeks, a tuff of (h/c) hair on her little head, tiny hands gripping her mother's shirt.

“Harry” (y/n) whispered, her face shining with pride (and a little sweat) “come here, someone wants to meet you~” Harry gave a shaky nod, his hands trembling.

“shes so” his voice cracked, a grin splitting on his face “so beautiful~” he reached toward her, hesitating a bit, gasping when the little babe opened her, eyes ocean blue- just like his, and giggled, reaching out from under her little red blanket and grasping onto his finger.

Harry let out a sob, collapsing to the floor, a look of pure awe on his face, staring at the little angel.

Why did he ever want to hurt her?

“what are we gonna name her?” you whispered, staring at Harry as he cooed at your daughter. It was soo different than 8 months ago when he wanted you to abort the little one.

But luckily for you, by the time you were due, you had long been in Auradon.

“Emma” Harry whispered, leaning forward to nuzzle the babe's squishy face. “Emma Swan Hook”

You beamed, laughing as “Emma” began to giggle as her father kissed her face. “for your mom? It's perfect, welcome to the world little Emma~”

You carefully lifted her, leaning forward and pushing her into Harry's chest, who quickly wrapped his arms around her, her head in the crook of his arm.

“mind her head, there you go” you whispered, smiling as Harry let out another sob.

“God I love ‘er” he whimpered, lifting her slightly and lowering his head, pressing his forehead to hers. “I love ‘er I love ‘er”

“and she loves you, I can tell” you smiled, watching as Emma laughed and reached up to harry, placing her hands on his cheeks.

“and I love you (y/n)” harry stood from the floor, sitting down on the bed next to you. “so much”

“I love you too har” you muttered, sleep overtaking you. You passed out on Harry's shoulder, smiling as Harry's coos and emmas laughter faded in the background.

---the end~---

perm taglist

@mockeryhamato​

[seduceme-lovestruck-thearcana]

@megatraven

UGHHHGHGH. I keep thinking of Hades angst and yo,,I remember a screenshot from Astraeus route and I think it had Hades holding his scythe (from his Reaper) to MCs neck or something?? OR MAYBE I LIKE,,IMAGINED THAT??? But like,,imagine if that happened...

AND BTW THIS IS SUPER LONG IM SO SORRY JFEWFB.

MC doesn’t want to be Hera. She begs for anything else to happen to her. She’s lost, scared, in despair, and she needs a way out. And Hades knows this. Not just because she doesn’t want to die, but because like I headcannon, when a god takes over, you basically have to be in this abyss and watch what happens, ya know?? And honestly that IS terrifying, it makes sense for her to not want to be there. ESPECIALLY FOR ETERNITY?!?!?!? THAT WOULD BE HELL ITSELF!! AND SHE TELLS HADES THAT!!

So...she goes to him and begs him for a way out. And like...he has tried hard. He has taken the route in his own route (where he’s fought for her with everything) and it’s still not enough. They’re gonna make sure she becomes Hera, no questions, and they’re both scared. And MC has an idea and so does Hades, and neither of them like it. She basically asks him to kill her...And like my mind was like “NO!!!” And that screenshot came to mind (unless its fake and I hallucinated it-) and I was so sad because...in this AU he would. She’d beg and say how she’d rather die at his hands than the other Gods hands. Wants the last thing she sees to be her fiancée. Even if its a sad look, he’s still there. And that’s what she wants. She doesn’t want to be separated, to see him from afar, to see him suffer knowing he won’t hear her last words. 

Which would be “I love you.”

But she will not die at the hands of all the Gods. Part of MC thinks its to spite the Gods and say how they cant control her, another part is fear. And there’s a little part of hope in there, right in her chest, small but bright, hoping that she’ll find her way to him. She’ll be able to hold him again, see his purple eyes look at her with all the love in the world, and see everyone again. Well,,,everyone immortal. And she’s reminded of everyone. Hades sneaks Alex, May, Josh, the boys, and Aphrodite to see her. She tells them what she plans to do. Obviously, none of them like it. They hate it and suggest everything else, but MC can’t change her mind. She will not risk the chance of her keeping Heras power OR being stuck in an abyss forever. Just the mention of the idea makes everyone cringe because she’s right...that IS a hell. So...they spend one last night with her. They keep it quiet, watch a movie, talk, tell her what they all want to tell her. 

Especially ALEX!! ALEXXX!!! They’re scared to tell her. They know they will be denied and afraid to ruin everything at this last moment, but they need to tell her. So, they do. They tell her everything on their heart and she listens with surprised eyes. She was oblivious to this. She thinks its because she hasn’t been relaxed with them in a long time, so she never noticed, but now that it’s in front of her face...she realizes tHAT YEAH ALEX DOES LOVE HER AND HAS SHOWN IT BIJFBKF. And she smiles and “C” comes out of her mouth before she cuts herself off.

They’re not Cyprin here.

They’re Alex.

That’s who they have been to her all the time, and she smiles and pulls them into a hug. “Thank you, Alex. I love you too, I hope you know that Alex. Maybe not the same way, but you are my best friend, Alex. I love you, too.” She said Alex so many times, as if she was learning their name for the first time again. It makes them happy to hear it come from her lips again, and everyone loves the sweet moment. And Cerberus and his brothers give her hugs and Cerberus gets his aura out to cheer her up and keep things happy for a bit. Josh shares funny stories of cooking, his mishaps, and everything! Aphrodite tells her own stories, BASICALLY EVERYONE SHARES SOME WHOLESOME STORIES. EVEN MC!! SHARING HER FEELINGS OF EVERYONE AND HOW SHE LOVES THEMMM ALL!!!

 And when everything is said and done, its about 6 am, and the Gods are coming for her. They’re coming to take her to the throne room, but no.

They won’t get her.

They can’t.

Everyone leaves them alone, but they all give her a kiss on the cheek or forehead and a TIGHT hug because they will miss her. THEY WILL!! And May and Josh basically threaten that she better know that. She knows that and promises that she’ll be watching them from the afterlife and it makes them all cry harder, but they leave and its just Hades and MC. However, to be NSFW real quick, they ‘get together’ before it happens bc honestly,,,idk thats just where my mind went lol. AND THEN,, THE TIME HAS COME,, HE HAS TO KILL HER BECAUSE HE PROMISED HER!! He calls upon his Aura and MC notices the sad look on the Reaper and she gives them both one last smile. The Scythe is at her neck and Hades’ tears streak down his face as she closes her eyes and takes her final breath. He was holding her hand and the grip was tight, and it went limp (Idk what he’d do necessarily?? Just uses the scythe to take her soul). She was falling to the ground but he caught her instantly and held her to him as he cried on the floor. What would he tell the Gods? What would he do? What will he do without her? He has his friends and everyone to back up that she wanted this...but still. 

What will he do without her? Who will be the light to his shadows? 

Zeus and Poseidon come through his door (not even knocking), and they call out for Hades, but they speed up when they hear Hades sobs. They come to the main room (idk I assume the door is a littles away from the main room like the living room) and they see Hades clutching MCs body to him. There’s no blood, no struggle, nothing. Just him holding the love of HIS LIFE in his arms, knowing he just ended the life of someone he loves once again...

Zeus and Poseidon just stand there for a second. Hades refuses to look them in the eye, cant look at them, and just looks at his lover...the one he loves so much...But he can’t avoid it forever. He looks up at his brothers and Zeus is furious and Poseidon is sad. Zeus is so close to attacking him, but Poseidon grabs his arm with a TIGHT grip. Poseidon isn’t even looking at anyone, just at the ground. “Hades...what happened?” His voice isn’t angry, it’s just sad, and worried. Zeus still can’t say a word. Hades looks back up at them. 

“She...she wanted it to end.” His voice was shaky and tears still streamed down his face. “She told me...she wanted it to be me. For me to end it. Not you.” He growled the ‘you’ out. “She didn’t want to be trapped in an abyss for eternity. And it makes sense. None of us want to be trapped...”. He stops there, he can’t continue. He looks back down at her and hugs her body closer to him. 

“The Reaper has taken yet another soul...” he whispers out, and his brothers hear him. This time, even Zeus is sad. He’s never seen his older brother like this (yh I found out Hades is the OLDEST FIREJBFD). This emotional and this heart broken. Or maybe he has and he just never payed attention. That makes him realize his actions and everything he’s done. Its shameful and he stares at MC as well, feeling his heart drop. And its not just because of Hera...its because she was going to be his sister-in-law (I think that’s what they are??? IDK MEG-) and that is an innocent woman. He doesn’t know how to face this (not even my Zeus knows how to face his emotions-), so he just walks to Hades and goes to sit beside him. Hades flinches away from him and his hold tightens on her for a moment, and both brothers understand why he does that. But they just sit beside him, in silence. “She asked you?”

“Yes. I would not take her life for no reason...I would NEVER even dream of it”. Poseidon hears the bite in his voice and the way its darker from his power, the power he tries to hide and not flaunt around like everyone. He just nods and it goes silent. “But at least...it wasn’t painful...”. Hades whispers it out. He knew the ritual would be painful, he knows it is. Not from experience but the ritual takes the soul apart...it’s going to hurt. He wouldn’t wish that pain on her. He would give his life, but the Gods wouldn’t accept it. Hell, he’s lucky they let him have her for one more night. The tears have stopped because they can’t continue. They always rise to the surface, but won’t drop. “I lost her...she’s gone...it’s all our faults...”. Hades made sure they all knew it was their faults. Not them but the Gods in general. They’re desperation for a Goddess who didn’t want to come back, who BEGGED to not come back, led to the death of an innocent woman. Led to a woman wanting to die. And I imagined Hades finally telling Zeus the whole truth like...it’s an emotional moment, and he feels like he should tell him.

“Zeus,” he says, his voice back to normal since he’s reigned his power back in, “Hera wanted to die. She asked me to take her, so I did. But she made me promise her to not let her come back. Never. Or maybe until she was ready, I’m not sure exactly. And when I found [MCs mothers name]...”. His breath catches at the mention of MCs mother who was also taken to early, a woman he loves as well, who was killed by the Gods. Direct or not didn’t matter. “She was Hera’s reincarnation and I...I was a little afraid. I made H.E.R.A with her and Aphrodite and I planned to tell her of her power that she held. But...I realized that I cared for her. Not in a romantic way, but she was a sister to me, I cared for her dearly, yet she was taken away from us because of US!” His voice was louder, and his eyes were shut still facing MCs body. Poseidon and Zeus flinch at his voice, not used to Hades being this angry even if they understand why he’s angry. “And I had to hold her in my arms when she died...and it moved to MC...and I fell for her, and I’ve done everything I can. But none of you wanted to think of her. Think of a woman who has done SO MUCH for us, a woman who has already suffered because. OF. US!” 

When he mentioned that she had done so much for them, they were reminded of his s1 when basically everyone disappeared and was taken, yet MC was such a big factor into helping them...and they forgot that. They shouldn’t have, but they did. And it hurt them all. 

AND AWAY FROM HADES TELLING ZEUS AND POSEIDON HIS STORY, they have a funeral on Earth. Even Hades will not bury her on Olympus. A part of him wants to since her mother is buried there, but he remembers Josh, May, and Alex. None of them will come to Olympus anymore, he knows it, and he won’t torture them by forcing them to come to Olympus to see her. And its all emotional. And,,,Hades tells everyone (as in her close family,,including May bc she IS family AND THE BOYS!!) that he’s sorry, but they know he did his best. Aphrodite witnessed it, and so did everyone else. And for the few years...it’s all silent. Hades attends meetings and does his work because he knows MC wants him to. MC wants him to keep living, being kind, helping people, and being Hades. But she asked him to promise her something...promise to never love another. And it was promised with NO hesitation. He loves her and no one else and he’s lucky to have had the chance to love her

ESPECIALLY AFTER KNOWING ALEX LOVES HER!! THEY’VE KNOWN HER LONGER AND HONESTLY HADES IS A LITTLE SURPRISED SHE DIDNT END UP WITH ALEX IFBHKRJEBWB. But like I said, everything is silent, emotionless. Everyone smiles from time to time, but it’s mainly quiet. Well, some of the Gods don’t care, and he honestly gets PISSED when he sees that, but he just goes back to his estate or his condo. Probably his condo since he has more memories of her there. She was never one for Olympus. It was beautiful to her, but it made her anxious, so the condo (and her apartment) was her safe place. And he goes to the fridge the day of her funeral and guess what he sees??? GUESS WHAT HE SEES??? He sees MCs baked goods. He takes them out and eats them and tastes how sweet and full of love they are. He KNOWS it will be a long time before he can taste this type of sweetness again, but he’ll happily wait 1,000 years if that’s what it took for her to come back to him. And he’ll keep his promise. 

He will find his light again. He will. And maybe his light will find him. Light needs darkness after all....

UGH MEGGG!!! IM SAD!!! BUT I LOVE IT!!! LITERALLY STILL SOBBING AT THIS IDEA 😭. I JUST!!! LOVE HADES SO MUCH!!! AND HIM BEING EMOTIONAL AND STILL BE SO HARD AT UNDERSTANDING EMOTIONS IS SO AMAZING!!!! I love him and hNNNG IM SO SAD. I hope you like this and sorry its so long...

Love you 💙 💙. I’m so sad,,,but I love it and I hope you’re sad as well 😭 😭.

[iereiaio]

𝕸𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖞𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝕮𝖍𝖔𝖎𝖈𝖊

There is no shadow work prompt today, however I will be giving some updates, and then some insight on a reading I had received and then one I just did for myself. They have similar messages but I feel mine is more in depth. I will be separating the topics into sections so you can skip around to what you’d like! 

Updates regarding the Account

I will be trying to post more starting today. I feel as though Haides hasn’t been very happy with me considering my inability to devote ANY time to him, aside from talking to him at night before bed, and sleeping with his altar bag. I feel he’s in the forefront of my mind on most days, but I’ve been lacking the motivation and energy to do anything about it. I am a Priestess. He chose me out of nearly 8 BILLION people in this world. He’s been with me since I was born into this life, as well as all of my previous lives. He has been with me for hundreds, if not thousands of years. I had gotten this confirmed by several readers, and several of my own readings, and I had always had a very strong pull towards him, as well as luck with a lot of things. He’s believed in me for so long, and I can feel his patience in me wearing thin, and it’s a very lonely feeling. He hasn’t pulled back from me, however I just feel like he doesn’t have as much faith in me as he once did. So I will be trying to do shadow work at the very least once a week, but I aim to do 3-6 days a week. So expect more posts with shadow work. I was healing when I was journaling and pulling cards every day. I have been very stagnant lately and I know it’s because I’ve been neglecting my journey of healing, but also my deities and other passions in my life. I know Haides understands, but I also know he wants me to do better and try harder. Even a little bit of effort, I’m sure he will appreciate 

The reading I had received 

I got a reading from a friend today, I pulled it regarding new deities potentially knocking on my spiritual door (I feel as though Lucifer and Lilith are wanting to work with me, but somebody I don’t know said that Lilith told her it was an imposter entity, so I am needing to do some research before confirming or denying that. This reading was supposed to do that, but instead it came for my throat. Anyway, on with the cards:

6 of swords

5 of swords

10 of swords

9 of swords

4 of pentacles

7 of wands

the Hermit

queen of swords  

So into the interpretation, they said I have very little energy (as represented by the 6 of swords), and that Im trying to heal but it’s just really difficult. Any new deities coming into my circle will provide me more energy, but it will “hurt” me a little bit- (represented by the 10 of swords, I am personally believing it may be once I start putting more energy into Haides, I will be getting this newfound energy) And by hurting me, it will be learning lessons. As lessons are often hard to learn. I am represented again in the 9 of swords, being in pain consistently (mentally) but with the 4 of pentacles, Hades will help me step into my personal power, and break free from restrictions i feel financially- but also emotionally. Im being given the opportunity to go forth after the things in life that im passionate about, and i know what im passionate about but i fear both success and failure. The Hermit, which was a funny draw, because Haides uses that card to represent himself in my decks- but I feel alone a lot ofthe time (not a lie anyway lmao), and with the Queen, im being called to action to either step up or get out of the battle. Im being called to be more assertive and call to Haides for the strebgth Im currently lacking. “Embody him so to speak”. They suggested EVOKING Haides, and even INvoking him next. They also said my protections might be weak (hope I don’t regret saying that online)

Now onto my own reading

So, for mine, I did it pretty soon after theirs, since they gave me a bit of clarity on what to look for. As well as insight that Haides wasn’t too happy with me and my depressed shenanigans. While YES hes understanding, and more understanding and patient than many other deities would be, he is still growing impatient with me, considering how little effort im putting into ANYTHING. So with the insight, i decided to do my own pull based ont he reading I had gotten from my friend. The cards I pulled were:

(the first reading was very short and to the point)

Page of Swords 

The Hermit (only to find Haides in the deck)

King of Cups

And in the second reading, which was much longer, I pulled:

Two of Wands

Eight of cups (R)

Four of coins (R)

Seven of cups (R)

Three of coins 

The High Priestess (R)

The Magician (R)

The Fool

Page of Cups

The World

The Artist (unique major arcana card to this deck)

The way that I personally interpret the first reading, is that Haides misses my energy, and would like to help me gain it back, however I need to devote at least some of my energy to him and show him my loyalty to him in order to get that in return. I cannot expect help with healing without giving him anything in return. I need to do better if I want his help. He will be there for me, but he wants me to do better. He wants the best for me. 

As for the second reading, I have some decisions i need to make, i assume about my current artistic path, i will have some career opportunities but i need to work now to get them. My depression and hopelessness is represented by the 8 of cups, ive been in a real bad rut these last couple weeks, moreso in the last few days as some bad, traumatic memories have started to resurface. Haides is reminding me with the 4 of coins to start being more responsible, not only with my money, but with my time. I’ve spent so many days moping in bed, sad, sleeping all day; he wants to help me but he wants me to prove to him that I am devoted to him and my healing journey. He wants me to try, even on hard days. He wants to give me clarity and strength to move forward, but again, wants me to  prove my loyalty to this journey. If i put forth the effort, i will grow and blossom in the ways I need to. I will succeed with him by my side. However I need to be more open with myself, and not allow ignorance to take me off my path. I need to remember that the things that have happened to me, have already happened. And while it’s okay to process and be sad about them, and traumatised (as its as if im living these things for the first time), but I cannot let them ruin my entire day, or multiple days. I cannot let my life waste away because of something bad happening. I need to stop letting insecurities rule my life as well. I’ve noticed when I get insecure about something, I shut down and don’t even complete, or start the project. I need to understand that everything isn’t going to be perfect. Though despite the learning I need to do, I also need to cater to my inner child. I need to hold onto that innocents and free spirit. i need to focus on new beginnings and getting these new things rolling instead of just staring at them hopelessly, letting them intimidate me. I need to dive back into spirituality and again, tend to my inner child. If I can do that, I will be successful and happy; I can be brought to the right path, but I need to get back on the right path. Things are rocky, and it’s gonna be a little weird going backwards so I can get back on the right path, but sometimes it’s necessary. I also believe I will have a lot of success with art. I just need to put my mind to  it and put energy into it. I wont get recognition and success by never drawing or posting. I wont succeed if I don’t put in the work. 

[noorengels]

reasons i am sad (friendship edition)

in year 4 my best friend invited everyone to her birthday party and not me and they all actually kept it a secret really well they almost pulled it off except she held her party in la plaza which basically is the hangout spot for families in that area i spent all my fridays there playing until midnight bc literally everyone from school would go. so i was walking home with my entire family inc grandparents and uncles and we went through la plaza and there they were! every single one of my friends at her party! apparently her mum didnt let her invite me bc apparently i hit her which i didn’t i hit another girl so her excuse is invalid and its the first time ive been so publicly excluded i cried on a bench.

in year 7 we hated this girl bc she was so fake i genuinely believe she is a psychopath like she has all the symptoms except shes in set 5 maths lol so my friend was like what if i spread a rumour about her and i was like lol do it and she did and for some reason i was blamed??? and lost all of my friends and she bullied me so hard but i didnt realise bc i was “friends” with her bc our mums were friends so shed like walk with me to lessons and talk to me while belittleing me and idk she was just a fucking bitch she made me feel so horrible like it was emotional bullying but also like telling everyone who i liked and saying lmao you literally have no friends “count how many friends you have? omg you literally cant even reach ten can you???” like in front of everyone but then shed also be really nice to me at the same time like idk it was like she was my friend but she bullied me it was so horrible saffa i hate you and the original friend who spread the rumour went on to become her best friend for like 6 years so uh hate that

managed to make friends with people not in my class in year 8! which sucked bc saffa had alienated people in my class so now they all just didnt like me i was the weird girl with no friends because of her and it was so horrible bc id always be forced to join the ready made groups between friends by the teacher  bc i didnt have a group to work with or id get paired with the weird girl like i was only the weird girl after saffa made everyone hate me this girl was weird bc she just is idk 

in year 10 they made a gc without me! i basically created that group tho like i gathered these friends i hade made in different lessons (obviously not in my main class lol) and they literally just??? decided to exclude me for no reason. and then theyd talk about what they talked about in the gc in front of me like “omg remember last night on the gc” isha ur so fucking boring no normal person talks about their gc with the same people again do u have no other conversational points smh

in year 11 it got so bad to the point where once i sat with them and they all just left! like they took their stuff and moved to the table behind me i wanted to cry so bad i did at home i think its the worst one out of all of these because it happened to my face? idk saffa was horrible too but this was just “were leaving” idk like ive never felt as horrible as i did in that moment i cant even describe how im feeling rn reliving it

its okay bc i made friends with my best friend from sciences + history bc our surnames are next to each other so we always sat together! i honestly clung to this girl after that bc i refused to spend a second longer with that other group after 3 years of enduring not even being liked by ur friends so i made friends with her friends which was easy bc yes! 

so by the first term of year 12 i had three friends! in fact one of them was like ur not having a birthday party??? im taking u out to eat so my first birthday event thing in literally years was all thanks to arun i am honestly so grateful for him he didnt even go bc he was busy and we planned it the day before my birthday but it was literally me and two friends eating pizza at zizzis and im crying so much rn but year 12 was when i found people who genuinely cared about me

we established a group of like 8 lol and were planning a holiday for the end of year 13! very skam of us! we had a gc and everything! we were gonna go to spain bc im spanish so i could speak!

this trip was unspoken of in year 13 and i was like lol kinda weird um okay but nope nothing weird about it they just created a chat without me and were still going to spain!!! one of them even sent me screenshots of their airbnb to translate its like u want me to know lol

i did complain to one of them but thats it i was just hurt on my own and coronavirus happened so it got cancelled anyways so i won really

in yr 13 i also got closer to this boy called adam! i remember my friend was like you two would get on so well idk why ur not friends and i was like idk its adam lol do i really want to and yes i did bc he is in fact the isak to my sana! but anyways i hate him but i love him we have that kinda friendship where were alwAYS trying to beat the other one up and honestly the most heart felt goodbye when schools shut was between us both bc at first we were fighting and then he just stopped and his eyes softened and i was like whats wrong with you why arent u punching me and he went come here and we hugged and its like wow despite being a dick ill miss you

anyways so uhhh quarantine we skyped often it was fun and then restrictions were lifted i went to spain and the second i land they all stop talking in the gc????? like im abroad not dead why are u creating a new one??? this gc was agressively spammed so i know for a fact theres another im not stupid

i come back from spain and theyre like can we meet!!! we meet three weeks later and theyr like i missed u so much im so happy uou came i love you and it felt really genuine like they genuinely missed me

two days later i find out through snapchat theyve all gone on holiday together!!!!!!!!!!!!! all of them and just ofc didnt invite me they went to the beach for two days and kept posting about it and im so bitter about it like bro???????? why so secretive????? like i cried so much when i saw bc they still just idk why does every single friendgroup ive ever been in exclude me like i must be the problem theres no other explanation for it i am not the kind of person people want to have around i am so funny but im a bitch and will come for ur ass because i have the inability to lie i have no filter either which i know makes them dislike me i know it does but thats the price you oay for being my friend i just say things as it is becauxe i hate secrets bc secrets are always about excluding me so i rather be honest and upfront but that clearly puts people off bc im too upfront and im not getting a personality transplant im not tryna be boring but im so sick of always being the one on her own

adam was relevant uh hews my only friend rn he checked up on me the other day so cheers adam for making sure im not completely isolated

the funny thing is that all my friends hate adam bc “hes a dick” hes not he just says things how it is were so similar so if they hate adam they hate me and im over being hated lol bye!

i start uni next week and i clearly have no social skills so im not gonna make friends im so scared of being lonely i hate being left out

this went from sad to full on angry like i was crying at some point and now im fuming like im so hot rn my blood pressure isnt doing okay

[onereallygoodlambonastick]

everything is make everything is make everything is make 

cog prof just did a :) for friday’s lecture and i wasn’t paying attention anyway its 3pm now brother is angry and traumatized probably and i stopped trusting fam 3 months ago and anyways these taiwanese songs maybe are saving my life rn in the sense that they’re the only songs that don’t jar or chafe and anyways i totally forogt about how to simply *exist* and maybe i should just go to the park and read the driver’s handbook and mesh with the grass and breathe under the mask and why is it so hard to be straight with myself rn???? who knows i never had an issue with being honest with myself and yet. here we are. makes going to a therapist all the harder. who knows. who knows. sick of my family. tired of them. tired of the nicey-nice-ness that they are keeping up. hate the way my mom leans forward to talk to me now. why do you do that. there’s no point. don’t pitch your voice. don’t talk to me. i hear you just fine. dad, we’re not business transactions. insert middle-class immigrant back-breaking country-ruining money, get a depressed nebulous fiend with bad eyes, teeth, kind of in university with no other remarkable accomplishments. i asked you why you had three kids. what a joke. simple is not simple. you are so fucked up, everybody is fucked up, why did you think your children would be any different? mom, you ask the wrong questions. you keep looking at me and my  brother wondering where it all went wrong. that’s not the point. the world is kind of shit, if you can’t tell. some things are out of your hands, so out of your hands you can’t even see it, know it. sorry. i was doing good. tired of my brother’s hostility. wonder if ill get better if i was on campus. rummaging through the old sack of fixations. nothing sticks. guilt is fog. trails after everything i do. i miss having fun. i have three things due at midnight today. three classes is a lot more manageable than four. maybe that’s because i stopped giving, stopped giving so much of a shit it petrified me into emptiness. gonna quit 2/3 extracurriculars. hate my dad using me against my brother. saying, hey look at her. did i mention i hate gender. i kind of want to play hades. or feel a thing. or something. without feeling bad. unlikely, however. super shallow. this is why i dont write. there’s nothing behind it. flat, flat, sad. where are my hard-won wisdoms. dammit. shuffle, shuffle, flick, click. i do a lot of shuffling. bait and switch. i have twenty times three tabs open. on two different browsers. weehee. this would be useful if i was hyper-organized like a quarter ago. cross-posting on socials is stupid and exhausting. don’t wanna use IG anymore that shit is stupid. endless scrolling is cool until they add suGgEsTed posts that i didnt even look for and expected to REMAIN in the EXPLORE section. god. dammit. also i haven’t drawn anything. which is unsurprising but also. sad. cuz i rely on drawing when i cant write. im not equipped right now to help my brother through his crisis, and i know my parents aren’t enough. he stopped letting us in months ago. sorry, bro. this is gonna show up meaner later for the rest of his life and im gonna be so sad. 

[noro-noro-noro]

me playing hades again to see what the ending is so don’t look in here

really. do not look. i’m screenshotting like every single frame of the cutscene so i don’t forget it. 

immediate flashback to why i stopped playing in july!

oh my god what is this. a chibi.........

this is such a funny thing to say. i’m going to say this next time anyone does anything to me. they added new aspects to his god fight too, waves that spwn in, seek you slowly & push you far. they also hurt a lot. 

i LOVE you have caused us both offense so die.. thesus talks more during fights

 supportive shade friend emotes when i talk to them :D

zagreus: oh, haha! it’s just a tiny rat!! tiny rat: [SHRIEKING FERAL ROAR] zagreus (panicked): oh gods

alright. cracks knuckles. let’s kill my dad

it is for me. 

i’ve seen this one before but it still makes me feel sad :’ it’s a good ending quip to finish on.

ANYWAY, THE MOMENT WE’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR!

i’ve left....

i can only walk here. i walk so slowly.

AHHHH

please don’t be a grave. please don’t be a grave. i don’t know how she’d die. it let me start running again & i forgot i had +40% movement speed & 20% more speed from ignited ichor & wowie

MOM...

im crying in the club

he DID tell her........

OH MY GOD HE IS DYING BUT LOOK AT THIS FUNNY NEW SPRITE

smel it by man who is dying

this is unwell

THE VOICE ACTING IS SO GOOD HERE I FEEL LIKE I’M GOING TO CRY

hades is pretending it didn’t happen. no ongoing underworld renovations this time.

zagreus, never having had a good parental figure except for achilles: yeah my mom was epic she was like you :) 

thank you queen i love you so much

i love you so much

as mortals do...

ANYWAY AAAAHHHH. GOOD gmaing

oh i also unlocked the aspect of the bow i think i’m only missing the gloves & gun ones now

[decrescending]

initial hadestown original broadway cast recording thoughts: woop this will be long bc i HAV so much

1. HOLY SH*T THE NEW PERSEPHONE VERSE! who’s doing the best she can? persephone! THATS WHO! i dont condone alcoholism but it definitely is a consequence of hades and persephone’s troubled marriage

2. um so whats up with seph introducing herself again in our lady of the underground

3. CMON GREEN THANG lmao hermes. the cast‘s reactions here is so cute uwu. i missed the slurping tho lmao for me it made livin it up on top tHAT song

4. seph and hermes taking orpheus parts in way down MAKES SENSE yall. im 100% on board. they know what happens in Hell and the mortals dont know shit

5. BRIAN DRYE ON THAT TROMBONE HOLY SH*T!

6. You’re early. I missed ya. F*CKING KILLS ME. EVERY SINGLE TIME

7. huh they really did skip to hey little songbird me for 0.005 seconds

8. PUTANGINA GAGO AJHSHJSHJASHSKH PATRICK PAGE!!!!!! HOW IS A GOD LIKE YOU ALLOWED TO WALK THIS EARTH???? HE KEEPS GETTING BETTER EVERY RECORDING IM IN TEARS I LOVE!!!!!

9. EVA’S where are you now, orpheusss?? GUYS I CANT STOP THE TEARS HOLY SH*T im always looking forward to this part bc it SHOWS so much about eurydice’s character and this productions’s portrayal of her relationship with orpheus

10. I FORGOT TO CLOSE MY MOUTH WTF IM STILL IN GOOSEBUMPS

11. WATCHU GON DO WHEN THE CHIPS ARE DOWN??? NOOOOOOOW THAT THE CHIPS ARE DOWN? F*CKING LAY DOWN MY FACE FOR YOU TO STEP ON!!! these fates are so dang sassy I STAN

12. they sound so full and menacing SHOOT TO KILL indeed

13. eva my baby :((((((((( im gone’s gasp!!! I AM SO DEAD TOO

14. jewelle’s in her skiiiin growl and basically every line ender of this song SLAPS

15. wait for me’s opening notes!!!!! FOREVER FAV

16. mR. HERMES! really do radiate mr. sTaRK! energy

17. orpheus sings with all my heart. kill me the f*ck now

18. AT THIS POINT IM JUST SOBBING

19. who are youuu?? THE FATES REALLY PERSONIFY DOUBT™

20. ajdhasjdhashk you can hear when the set changes!

21. HERMES SINGING WITH ORPHEUS IN I AM NOT ALOOONE! F*CK I HADNT THOUGHT ID LOVE THIS SONG MORE BUT HERE WE GO

22. I’ve talked before how i prefer broadway’s wait for me over nytw’s. I STILL DO

23. THEY TOOK OUT EURYDICE’S SOLO IN WHY WE BUILD THE WALL????

24. in a way i do understand bc it singles out eurydice too much and at an outside vantage point it didnt really need to happen bc all the solo does is present eurydice’s thoughts at this point. IM STILL DISAPPOINTED THOUGH

25. asjdhfjkdh my dumbass only now realized that anything can happen on the factory floor when the foreman turns his back is about persephone’s illegal spring club lmao

26. anybody want a drink? NEVER fails to make me laugh

27. i love our lady of the underground and livin it up on top but didnt seph already introduce herself in livin? sounds redundant tbh

28. but it gets us amber aND I AM HERE FOR IT. I JUST LOVE HER OKAY

29. THIS MUSICAL NAMING EVERY SINGLE BAND MEMBER! I WILL LOVE FOREVER AND EVER! ALSO THE CAST REACTING IS SO CUTE AND SUPPORTIVE

30. BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOu wANT stAAARRRS????? I DIDNT KNOW IT COULD GET BETTER!

31. tell my husband to take his time hades’ infidelity confirmed :/

32. ITS FLOWERS! EVA MY BABY I LOVE YOU

33. oh no theres no growling, shes playing it softer than onstage????????

34. IM KINDA DISAPPOINTED LIKE 1% BC I LOVED THE GROWLING-REGRETFUL-ANGRY-AT-HERSELF EURYDICE SO MUCH

35. OOPS NEVERMIND HER youuUUUUU, the one who i left behind RESSURECTED ME

36. andre’s super soft road to hell intro :((((((((((((((((((((((((((( i BAWL

37. its a sad song, its a sad tale, iTS A TRAGEDY. its a sad song. bUT WE SING IT ANYWAY GODS ANAIS. This song perfectly captures hadestown’s mythical origins. I WILL LOVE FOREVER AND EVER

38. u can hear the cracking in andre’s voice in iTS A SAD SONGs and the cast! the harmonies! I STAN EVERY SINGLE ONE

39. we’re gonna sing it again and again always ALWAYS KILLS ME HOLY SHIT

40. OHMY GOD THAT WAS A WILD F*CKING RIDE lets play it again! (and again)

notice how they released the songs highlighting the four tony nominated cast members? bar wait for me, which is a CLASSIC fav. i mean i get it, even if we wanted reeve to be nominated and even if the cast wants to, MORE SO than we do i daresay, they had to make sure the nominated ones get as much exposure as they can

ALSO i really love the sentiment that hadestown’s many versions and iterations actually makes it SO TRUE to mythology. myths and stories gets passed down in yeARS and generations until we mix whats right or wrong and better or worse. somebody posted about this a long time ago im sorry i cant remember you :( but thats what makes it so beautiful!! YOU CANT JUST F*CKING DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT! we all have our preferences and no one’s is the same as the person beside them but its the same musical we all adore.

also im still laughing about this but i forgot to include it up top dANA LYN! on the vioLIN!! LMAO

[supergirlimagine]

Lost & Found pt. 5

Heeeeey Guys! Alright so this has been Real! I had the best time working on this with the one and only @baked-bean-bekah! So this will be MY last Part for this Series. She’ll be leading us out with the final Part sometime next Week! Be excited! I Really enjoyed putting this together and thanks to everyone who showed us some love! We really appreciate it and are Glad you guys liked it, we shall see how this ends! Thats it from me✌🏽

Thanks for Reading🖤

The DEO is busy with Agents and IT personal scattering around. The latest attack had everyone on high Alert. In the Middle of it all, Maggie stands with Alex and Supergirl, looking at the Screen in Silence. A Picture of you was pulled up. A scared young child with a lost expression in her eyes, your baggy hospital gown making you look way to thin. You held up a sign that read: Subject 9473. Alex breaks the Silence.

"Brainy. Find Project Shockwave and tell me about it."

"I am not sure if we can access said File, Director Danvers. It seems to have been filled away as..Classified.”

"Then find a way, Agent Dox.", her order left no Room for argument.

Brainy ducked his head and works his fingers over the Tablet for a Few Seconds, just like that, the File showes up on the Screen. He starts rattling of the Details.

"Project Shockwave. A Cadmus experimental trial which had its Participants, from an unknown Planet of Origin, compete against each other to test their Strength and Stamina. The goal of the Program was to understand and then Convert the Subjects Abilities as a use for an never exhausting Power Source, meant for all Electronical Devices. Ultimately, the creation of Weapons with electricity currents, that would be stronger than any Man made machine, would come to be. Although, it looks like the Test Subjects were unable to meet the criteria in all but one cases and deceased shortly after Initiation of the Program. The dissection of the Subjects proved that...-"

"Okay. We get it." Maggie cuts him off, having heard enough.

"What about Y/N?"

Brainy lookes at her confused. She cleares her throat and shifts uncomfortably.

"Subject..9473?", she clarifies.

"Oh, yes. It looks like this Test Subjects was brought into the Programm as a young Child and was monitored and tested throughout Adolescence. Said Subject is known to Produce large amounts of Energy, which were successfully converted into Electricity. With excessive testing and training, the subject was later able to change it's monocular structure and Teleporte through any Electrical current. For safety reason, the Subject was held in Isolation. Held in a Glass Cell, surrounded by Water as it was one of the few ways to disciple the Subject. Power blocked devices were placed around it's Wrists at all times. Furthermore,..-"

"That's Enough. Thank you.", Alex cut him off this time, starting to feel sick to her stomach.

They hade somewhat of an Idea of what had happened to you, but were never able to get the full story. You had refused to tell all of it and they decided to stop pushing.

"Get the Alpha Team ready. We are moving out."

Without spearing another glance, Alex turned around and headed for the Armory. Supergirl close on her toes, determination strong in her features.

"Danvers! Wait." Maggie caught up with a few quick steps.

"Where do you think you’re going?"

She whipped around quickly and looked at her Finance.

"I'm going to do what I should have done a long time ago! I'm taking down Cadmus and then finding Y/N."

She made a move to leave again, when Maggie grabbed her Arm.

"Wow. Hey, Stop. You don't even have a Plan or any Clue on where to start. Let's think this through!"

Alex started getting irritated.

"No! Listen, Sawyer. I don't care! All they do is hurt People and use them for their own gain. I'm so sick of it! This ends tonight!"

Emotions were running high and Maggie matched her frustration.

"There is no point in running in there blind! You are going to get yourself hurt! Lets take a step back. I know you’re angry..-"

"I'm not Angry, Maggie! Im furious! They hurt the People I care about! Y/N is out there alone right now and probably terrified! If you would've just..-"

Maggie let go of the Brunettes arm and looked at her with raised Eyebrows.

"If I would have what, Danvers?"

"If you would have just stayed behind with her! Like I told you to!" Alex was close to shouting at this point and heavy Silence followed her Outburst.

Immediately, Alex felt guilty as the hurt expression crossed over her Lovers Face. She avoided her eyes in Shame and continued in a low voice.

"I'm Sorry. No, this is not your fault in any way. Its Just..If I would've been better and faster and paid more attention to her. I'm supposed to be the Director. I'm supposed to know these things. This is on me. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to let my anger out on you."

Maggies facial expression softened and she pulled Alex to the side when she saw her eyes starting to water.

"Hey, Alex. This is not anybodies fault, especially not yours. We will get her back and we will get justice, but not like this. I can't lose you too. Please."

Alex looked up now and stepped closer to Maggie, almost whispering the next words.

"I know you’re right..I'm just.. I'm scared''

Maggie tilted her head to the side, flashing her Dimples with a sad smile.

"I know, Babe. Me too."

--

It's been two Days since the Attack and two Days of you being back on the streets. You had not eaten or slept. You were constantly looking over your shoulder, frightened by every small noise. Using you Powers after such a long time had taken a lot out of you, but you couldn't afford to rest just yet and debating your next steps wasn't an easy task. Your brain was telling you to get out of town, leave this Place behind and find somewhere far away where they wouldn't be able to get to you. But there was a tightness in your chest, a hollow feeling creeped through your veins at the thought of leaving this City behind. You had never felt this before, like there was something that had made you want to hold on. You let out a sigh at the realization of how much you missed them. That's what this Felling was. You wanted nothing more than to go back Home and cry in their Arms and never leave their sides again, but that would be too dangerous. What if Cadmus found you there or worst yet, punish them for helping you? You had never felt this torn, because for the first Time since you could remember, you felt like there was something worth fighting for, like you had a chance at a happy and normal Life. Letting to ine good thing in your Life go just seemed like something you couldn't handle. The Rain was coming down heavy and you were trying to find cover in some Alleyway. Just as you were rounding the corner you saw a Tall Man towering over a frightened Young Woman. He was yelling at her.

"Give me your Purse! Now!"

She handed it over and you saw a Knife clutched in his fist, as he went through her Stuff. For a split second you wanted to turn around and just walk away, but that's not what Maggie and Alex would do. They are Heroes and they help People, so you should do the same.

"Hey!", you yelled and started to run towards the Guy.

He turned around just in time to see your eyes start to glow and Electricity forming in your Hands. He looked at you wide eyed, dropped the Purse and ran in the other Direction. You came to a stop in front of the scared woman, not thinking it was worth it to chase after the Guy. When you bent down to gather her Belongings and hand them back to her, you suddenly heard a voice yell behind you.

"NCPD! Freeze!"

You stoop up and turned around with the Purse in your Hand, this was bad.

"No!" You looked at the Officer with a shocked expression, understanding what this must look like.

You still had the woman's Purse in a tight grip and your eyes where glowing a pale blue, sparks still running along your finger tips.

"I'm helping!" You yelled back through the Rain.

The gun remained pointed in your direction so you turned and looked at the Lady, pleading with your eyes to back up your story, but all she did was stare at you in Horror.

"Keep those arms up!", the wavering Voice of the Officer made you turn your Head back around.

"I'm going to come over there an put these cuffs on you!" He reached behind him and pulled out a heavy set of cuffs.

You knew those and knew they would dampen your Powers.

"Please! Listen me..-"

"No! Just keep you Mouth Shut and no sudden Movements or I WILL shoot!", He mostly kept his composure, but it wasn't hard to tell that he was new and probably just as nervous and scared as you were right now.

You choose to not push any further, you could see this going sideways. The Cop slowly walked over to you, gun still raised and pointed forward, the Rain around you making it hard to see. The Lady standing off to your side finally seemed to snap back into her surrounding. She made a move forward and tried to make the Officer understand that this was all one big Misunderstanding. The sudden movement startled you enough to look around and put one arm out to let her know you had it handled. The next part happened so fast, you are not even sure it happened at all.

"I said don't move!" thats the last thing you heard before the deafening sound of a gun shot rang through the Allyway. The familiar sensation of Pain ran up your Leg, before the ground came up to meet you.

--

"Sawyer?" Maggies voice came out raspy and heavy with sleep.

They had been up for the most part of the last couple days. Looking for you and for a way to take down Cadmus and get you back safely. It was around 3 am now and they had just fallen asleep on the couch, surrounded by research and anything else that could help them.

"What?" She was standing just half a second later.

Fully awake now as Alex was slowly opening her eyes.

"Where is she?!" She raised her voice and Alex was at her side this time around already, trying her best at listening in on the Phone Call.

"What?? What do you mean she..- You know what! Nevermind We'll be there in 15min."

She hung up her Phone and walked over to the Front Door, where Alex was already putting on her shoes.

"Who was that? Where is she? Is she ok?"

She asked as she handed her Finance her coat.

"That was my work." Alex was just as confused as Maggie now.

"She's at the NCPD extraterrestrial Holding Cells."

They both shared a look and rushed out the Door, everything else forgotten.

--

You sit on one of the benches inside a small basement Cell. Your hands still locked in those awful Handcuffs behind your back. The bullet had only grazed your leg and it bleed a little bit, but they had wrapped it up with some gauze and had you sit down and wait for...you don't really know what you were waiting for. All you know is you were cold. You still had your clothes on which were damp from the rain and stuck to your body in an uncomfortable way. This was not how you thought this Night would have gone. Suddenly, a familiar voice cuts you out of your thoughts and you perk up to see where its coming from, your heart suddenly racing. It sounded like the quick steps were coming from just around the Corner.

"Where is that Rookie?! He freaking SHOOT her?? What the Hell is going on here?"

The Officer who had fired at you stood up from his Chair outside the Cell where he was watching up. You heard him gulp as he straightens up and braces himself.

"Please. Detective, we need you to calm down."

They were getting closer.

"Don't tell me to calm down right now! Just get me to her!"

You looked up just as they rounded the corner and your eyes immediately lock with Maggies, which made her she stop in her tracks. Alex was close behind her and you heard her sigh in Relief, when she saw you sitting there. The world stopped for a second as the three of you just stared at each other.

"Open the Cell.", Maggies voice came out calmer, but still not with the same amount of Compassion it usually carries.

"I'm sorry Detective. There are protocols. She's dangerous and I can't just..-"

The Rookies next words were cut off by him being slammed against the Wall behind him. He had at least half a foot on Maggie, but she was still holding him against the Wall, her Forearm pressed against his throat.

"Listen Buddy! You are going to open this Cell for me. Right. Now." Her voice was low and dangerous, there is fire in her eyes.

"I suggest you don't say another Word. I'm not even close to being done dealing with you for shooting at my kid! You don't even want to know what you got coming if you don't open this damn Door!"

She let go of him and he looked at her with wide eyes, too scared to even move.

"NOW!"

He stuttered out a quick 'Yes Ma'am' before stumbeling over to the Door and fumbling to unlock it. The second it was open, Alex rushed inside and wrapped you in her arms.

"Oh my god! Y/N! I'm so sorry! I should've look after you better! I'm so glad you're alright!" She pulled back and held your face between her hands, forcing eye contacts as she clarified.

"You're alright, yes?" Hey eyes drifting to your wrapped leg.

You nod and can't help but lean into her touch. You close your eyes and smile a little. You never thought you'd ever miss another's Persons touch, but you sure had.

"What happened Y/N? Why didn't you come back?", Her voice sounded hurt and you tried to sit up and reassure her, but the cuffs made moving around hard.

"Take them off." Maggie was standing slightly behind Alex and had her arms crossed over her chest.

She had barely finished her sentence when the Rookie came over and had you unlocked. Alex now gave you a proper Hug and you could feel the love and worry radiating off her. You looked over her shoulder and locked eyes with Maggie, dread made it's way into your stomach when you weren't able to read her expression.

"Give us some Space." She instructed without breaking your eye contact.

The Rookie and other Officer, that had led them down there, were out ther so quickly, you were sure they were the ones with Power. Maggie finally seemed to Relax. Alex let you go and started to examine your Leg, not caring about the protest that you were giving. It was silent for far to long for your liking and you started to get anxious. A single Light bulb was hanging from the ceiling of the Cell, it flickered and your eyes shot over to it. For a split second, you thought about just zooming out of there.

"Don't." Maggies voice was still sharp, but also soft and it held no venom, like it had with her Colleges.

You turned your head in her direction, ashamed that she knew what you were thinking of.

"You hate me now?" It was meant as a question, but came out more like a statement.

"No! Y/N..That's not." The detective let out a heavy sigh and moved closer to you, kneeling down to be eye level and put her hand on your thigh.

"I'm just worried. You were gone and we had no Idea where you were or if you were Okay."

Alex looked up from where she was making sure your Leg was fine and the bleeding was controlled.

"We were so worried about you.", she added to the conversation.

"I'm sorry. Had to leave. Too Dangerous for you." You look at them with watery eyes, the events from the last couple Days finaly catching up with you.

"I'm....My Powers", you almost spat that word, hating what it made you.

"My Powers are Bad, like me. I'm Bad Person", it came out broken and just above a whisper.

There was no need to hide anything from the two of them anyways, they would always know.

"No! Hey..Don't say that Y/N!" Maggie picked up your Chin and made you look at her.

"You are not Bad. You are one of the smartest, funniest and kidest People I’ve ever meet! Even after everything this World has done to you, you still give it so much Love. Its amazing to witness and be a part of. You are good, you have a good Heart. Just because you have these gifts, doesn't mean you are bad."

Alex was holding your Hand and nodding along with what Maggie was saying.

"She's right. For the short amount of time I was lucky enough to have you in my Life, you have only made it brighter."

Tears were making their way down your Face.

"You mean it?"

"Yes. Of course we do. And Y/N..It's okay to be scared sometimes, but you don't have to run anymore. You don’t have to be guarded. I was scared too when you were gone, but as long as we all stay together, we’ll be fine. I promise you. Forever."

---

You guys had finally made it home. You were unsure if you should've gone with them at first, but that was out of the question for them. Some more protest followed as Alex stitches up your Leg and you were now laying half on Top of her and fast asleep on the couch. She was playing with your Hair and was softly soothing you everytime you flinched our let out a whimper in your sleep. A comfortable silence was in the Air.

"So...", Alex looked up at Maggie with a knowing smirk, her hand never stopping the soft motions over your head.

The brunette was sitting at your Feet and was Knee deep in Files that was spread out across the Table. They still had to find a way to stop Cadmus.

"What, Danvers?" She didn't have to look up, to know exactly what Alex was playing at.

"Your kid, huh?" Maggie stopped writing and put down her Pen to look at the two of you.

Her features immediately softening at the sight. The quick, witty comeback dying on her lips, as she took in the scene in front of her. This was Perfect and everything she never knew she wanted.

"Yeah.” She reached over you and grabbed Alex hand, letting the Moment take over, nothing but love in her eyes.

“She’s ours.”

Alex gave her Hand a soft Kiss and looked down at your sleeping face and nodded.

"She sure is."

A frown took over her Face, thinking of what they were facing next.

"What if they take her?”

"Hey. No, don't worry. They won't. I will fight with everything I have for our Family. I know you will do the same."

Maggie made sure her Tone showed Alex how serious she was about this.

"Yes. I’m oing to be right there next to you.”

Alex whispered as she moved some stray hairs from your exhausted Face.

____________

@thatcrazybookwormgeek @mysterious-teen-blogger

[indulgnces]

hi howdy hello!! i go by jess and this is my first time playing my sweet bb girl, so i’m pumped! more about my girl audrey below the cut!

❛  ( SARAH JEFFERY )  ◈  dude, shut up ! AUDREY ROSE from DESCENDANTS is on screen. their fans swear they’re just DETERMINED & OUTGOING, but we’ve all seen their JEALOUS & STUBBORN side ! according to TRUMAN WIKIA, they’re TWENTY-ONE years old, BISEXUAL, & identify as CISFEMALE ( SHE/HER ). they’re currently a STUDENT & are RELIEVED about life in truman. luckily they have HER DIARY & HER SONGBIRD NECKLACE with them & can visit THE FAIRY COTTAGE whenever they want. penned by JESS.

sooooooooo confession: i’ve never watched a descendants movie from start to finish 😬 I know! crazy considering I’m playing a character from the movies, but like, have you guys ever seen a character and just be like wOW, that is My Type of character? cause that’s what happened with audrey. descendants 3 came out and was trending, and I checked the tag and like was 👀👀👀 to audrey to the point that I watched queen of mean and got HOOKED. caught a replay of the movie and watched all the audrey parts while skipping over the rest. since then I’ve been in love with my girl and she’s been on my mind so much that I’m returning to rp after a small break to play my girl. In preparation I skimmed through descendants 1 & 3, and adurey’s youtube short story so I’m good to GO. 

CANON LIFE

“A lifetime of plans, gone. Our family status, gone. Audrey, you were supposed to be his Queen, and you let him slip through your fingers. Your mother could hold onto a prince in her sleep.” 

daughter of sleeping beauty and prince phillip, princess audrey has been groomed since she was a child by her grandmother to become the queen of auradon. she’d been friends with prince ben since she was a child, and was expected to marry him when she got older.

grew up used to the finer things of life, and as such, audrey was a bit self-absorbed and spoiled. became the most popular girl in school due to her status and beauty. was cheer captain. finally became romantically involved with ben at some point in high school. life was going exactly as planned. 

then ben decided to invite 4 villain kids (vks) from the isle of the lost to auradon, and everything went to shit. the stark black and white, good vs. evil mentality was deeply ingrained in audrey’s psyche, so she was very much AGAINST the idea of any isle kids coming over. convinced the vks were up to no good, she never warmed up to the them, and bullied them (mostly mal) at times. and you know what? she was RIGHT

mal used a love potion to steal her boyfriend, who then humiliated audrey by serenading mal during a tourney match, where audrey was cheering at. no one gave two shits though?? or suspected foul play at all?? they just cheered and were like “ah, cool! our soon-to-be-king has suddenly declared his love for this new vk who’s only been here for a few days! how awesome and totally natural !! “

audrey was still plenty popular by the end of the movie, but her fairy godmothers decided to treat adurey to a spa trip, which turned into an extended trip that required her needing summer school bc she missed so much school (aka why she was absent for descendants 2)

by the time audrey came back in descendants 3, everyone was ALL up mal’s ass crack. ben proposed to mal in front of everyone, serenading her with the SAME song he did in the first movie when he ceremoniously proclaimed his love for mal while simultaneously dumping audrey, and everyone cheered AGAIN for their union. damn thing broke audrey’s whole ass heart. on top of that, her grandmother chastised audrey for her failures in securing ben and basically failing the family. 

she also lost her status come d3??? like, at the end of d1, she was still cool as fuck. but come d3 girl is not even being invited to her friend’s birthday parties anymore?? she has no friends?? no one gives two shits about how she must be dealing with everything? and wow does that not help things at all.

that night, in her loneliness and anger, audrey decided to steal the queen’s crown from the artifacts museum. it was a petty thing. she was hurt, and just did NOT want to see the crown she’d envisioned as her own for all her life be placed on mal’s head. she didn’t have a goal beyond taking the crown. however, when she went to the museum, maleficent’s scepter sensed audrey’s emotions and desires for revenge, and revealed itself to her. it’s glow lured audrey to it, fed into her emotions, and bing bang boom, audrey became the ultra fabulous QUEEN OF MEAN 

under the scepter's influence, she put half of auradon under a sleeping spell, the other half she turned to stone, then she made ben a beast after he rejected her, and made mal an ugly old hag. she was foiled at the end by mal, and ended up falling under a sleeping curse as a result. with no True Love’s Kiss to awaken her (rip), the heroes ended up getting Hades to use his magic to wake her up.

at the end, she apologizes for her crimes & her emotions were finally acknowledged when mal and ben stepped up and apologized for their inconsiderate past actions to audrey (wELL, they never actually apologize?? they say ‘I owe you an apology” but both don’t like actually say sorry, and that’s 100% something audrey has noticed for sure). she celebrates at the end with everyone else when the barrier is brought down and is last seen dancing with harry hook 

POST CANON

totally headcanon that she’s still not 100% happy as she’s shown in the end while dancing around okay

she’s STILL lonely!! she STILL wants those apologies!! she’s STILL lost about what to do with her future now that her whole life plan has blown up in smokes. she’s HURT okay. her friends? abandoned her! ben? abandoned her! that one hurts the most bc after spotting that pic of audrey/ben as children together, I 100% hc that they have been best buds for years before falling into a relationship. and while it’s clear ben was not really ~in love~ with audrey ( i image they ended up getting together bc it was just Expected yknow?), audrey still had feelings for ben. even if it wasn’t true love (she def wasn’t In Love tho she thought she was), she did still love ben. he was her best friend, and the fact that he never came around to apologize to her for humiliating her the way he did after the love spell broke HURT. 

also hc that she had to take a remedial goodness class following her stunt 

the ending given to her is life a brief showing of her and harry hook smiling at each other all soft like before dancing, which like, i’m game for, but in terms of her actual future, audrey was trying to figure out just how to do life moving forward following everything

TRUMAN

“Tell me it was all a bad dream.”

yeah so I said audrey was relieved about her life in truman? 100000% true!

her life was incredibly sad and lonely before, so convincing her that all that shit was all just a bad dream was an incredibly easy thing to do for the descendants actors okay (im sad for her bc of this tbh)

her life as she knows it: she still comes from a family of high status and money. not technically a princess, but she sure does act like one. believes she was born and raised in truman, but was sent to boarding school at auradon prep since she was a child, where she thrived and grew into a typical Popular Girl (head of cheer team/one of the most beautiful girls), before returning to truman after graduating. basically she believes she had the same perfect life she had before in canon, minus the vks, ben, and the whole fairy tale/royalty stuff (basically everything that ruined that perfect life).

all that other extra stuff, including going all queen of mean and losing ben and being drop kicked by literally everyone, is just POOF, fuzzy memories, bad vivid horror story nightmares! every now and then she’ll witness an engagement, or spot a serenade, and it’ll trigger an overwhelming sense of sadness, but for the most part, she’s content putting her life behind her. her new life is a much happier one. that could totally change once she starts encountering people from her past life again.

only really recognizes her family members as family members, and maybe recognizes some past auradon friends (maybe chad charming as her ex since he’s the only one who didn’t totally abandon her rip)

since “returning” to truman, she’s entered university on the island. she wasn’t sure where she was going with life, but she knew she’s always been really good at drawing and really good at event planning. so in uni, she decided to keep her artistic talents as a hobby and pursue a career in event planning. in pursuit of this, she’s a senior at college, majoring in hospitality management.

PERSONALITY

positive: determined, headstrong, outgoing, self-assured, polite, moral, dedicated 

negative: jealous, stubborn, demanding, bossy, petty, close-minded, seemingly mean (tho she doesn’t consider herself mean, okay? she just can come off as mean/rude)

CANON CONNECTIONS

ben & mal: need them both bc they are the ones who hurt her the most so i’d loooooove to play out these dynamics in truman!! they’d be the most Triggering faces for her 

jay & harry & chad & uma: underrated audrey ships i’d love to play out bc literally crumbs are given to the majority of these dynamics, and so I want to just...explore them?? three of these 4 are vks and 2 of those 3 are people audrey actively pursued in some sort of ~connection~ at the end of the movies when the Couples got together, and she did that even tho she is very Moral and has confusing feelings about vks, and i just wanna know more!! 

TRUMAN CONNECTIONS

yeah this is getting long, so I’m planning on posting a whole separate post in the truman plot tag for these wanted connections! 

and yeah! that’s everything on my girl! if you’ve made it this far, you’re the best my dudes!! I’m gonna be on mobile for a good portion of the day before coming on at night, but if you’d like to do any kind of plotting with my girl, just go ahead and hit that like button, and I’ll slide in y’alls dms! ♥