#now I’ve got an hour to get ready for my after school club lmao

[leviiackrman]

First day at my new job was a success!!

[onceupon]

London Boy - Part 2: Let the Game begin

summary: You had always thought you knew exactly what kind of boys Rafe Cameron and Topper Thornton were - but did you actually?

pairing: Rafe x reader (slowburn)

warnings: swearing

word count: 2.5k

a/n: no one is asking for this but here it is anyways lmao enjoy (not canon Rafe)

You make it back to your room and take a deep breath. Boys. You were living with boys. Not just any boys - Rafe Cameron and Topper Thornton. Whatever, you thought, shaking yourself back to reality. It didn’t matter anyways. You weren’t about to let them get in the way of having the time of your life these next few months and you definitely weren’t going to let them keep your mind tied to OBX. That was a tie you desperately wanted to cut. Besides, if you knew Rafe and Topper like you thought you did, they’d be too caught up with playing both the field and the girls of Westheath before you knew it, effectively keeping them occupied and out of your way. 

You decided to go about your day as you usually would. Your Have a Great Day playlist was queued up and playing as you slipped on your favorite jeans and top. You let yourself get absentmindedly lost in your actions as you did your hair and makeup - enough to make you feel put together and regain some control after the way this morning had left you feeling vulnerable. Looking good made you feel good - and if anyone else thought you looked good too, then hey, that was just an added bonus. 

You hadn’t noticed how lost in the process of getting ready you had gotten until you looked down at your phone and saw that an hour had flown by. You were half way down the hall to the kitchen when the door of your flat flew open, bringing you face to face with two new people for the second time that day. 

“Oh my gosh hiiii!” a girl turned to you, pausing her laughter from the conversation she was having with the girl next to her. “I’m Olivia! It’s so nice to meet you!!” the bubbly girl exclaimed, immediately embracing you in a hug. The other girl laughed at her friend’s excitement and forwardness which had clearly startled you. 

“I’m Millie - you must be one of our flatmates,” the other girl smiled, introducing herself to you as well. 

“Hi, I’m Y/n,” you smiled softly. 

“Oh my gosh Mills! I knew it! I told you we’d get roomed with the Americans! Ugh this is so exciting, there’s so much I need to know I don’t even know where to start!” Olivia squealed with a little hop. 

“Alright don’t scare the poor girl, she’s gonna think they’ve stuck her with a couple of psychos,” laughed Millie, pulling her friend’s arm to lead her down the hall. “Come on Liv let’s let y/n breathe for a second while we go put our bags down,” she said, giving you an apologetic smile.

You laughed and continued on to the kitchen to get some water as you had originally set out to do. You were honestly relieved. Thank god your other two roommates were girls who weren’t remotely associated with OBX. You didn’t even mind their intensity, it was endearing really, and you’d take a couple of loud but genuine girls who seemed like they were a bunch of fun to hang out with over the bitchiness and cattiness you were used to with the girls back home at Kildare. 

“Alright Y/n, I forgot sheets and Mills didn’t bring a towel so we’re going to Primark and you’re coming with. I want to hear all the American gossip,” Olivia reappeared and then slipped back down the hallway with a wink. You laughed and went to go grab your bag, just then realizing Rafe and Topper were no longer at the flat. You wondered where they had gone, not hearing them slip out over the music you were playing earlier. Not that you cared, it was a relief to have them out of sight and out of mind for now. 

—

“Hmm Rafe Cameron and Topper Thornton, does sound rather posh,” mused Millie as you had begun providing some intel to your friends on the two flatmates they had yet to meet. 

“Two American ladies men, sign me up!” cackled Olivia. 

“Hey watch yourself missy, you’re taken,” Millie scolded. 

You had only known these girls for maybe an hour and somehow you had been comfortable enough with them to open up about your entire life’s backstory as you walked with them through the home section of Primark. It felt like they had been your friends for years, the three of you gelling together effortlessly. 

“Oo you have a boyfriend?” you asked as your eyes scanned over the shelf of fluffy blankets in front of you. You simply couldn’t leave without the light grey one, daydreaming about how cozy napping with it would be. 

“I do. His name is Jake,” Olivia beamed, “he’s kind of an idiot, but I love him.”

“And he’s got a whole squad of idiot friends too, but you’ll see for yourself,” Millie laughed. 

“Oh shit that reminds me! I invited them all over to pregame tonight before freshers,” chimed Olivia. 

“What’s freshers?” you asked, raising your brows in confusion. 

Millie and Olivia shared a quick laugh at how clueless you were to everything in their world. 

“So freshers is like this huge club event at the beginning of the school year. It’s really meant for uni freshers but since half of us are 18 and we can easily sneak in the other half it’s kind of tradition for Westheath kids to go their last year. Me and Mills went last year too though, one of the guys we knew the year above us was cousins with the bouncer,” Olivia grinned proudly. “But literally everyone is going and that means you’re coming too and- oh shit I’m such a bloody idiot aren’t I! I’m sorry Y/n I literally didn’t think at all to ask anyone from our flat if it was okay to host a pregame,” she bit her thumb with guilt-ridden eyes. 

“Looks like you and your idiot boyfriend are actually a match made in heaven,” joked Millie as Olivia gave her the finger, trying to suppress the smile tugging at her lips. 

“Oh no that’s totally fine! I’ve had like barely any human interaction these last few days and it’ll be nice to meet some more people from Westheath. It’ll be fun,” you reassured Olivia with a genuine smile. “I just uh- I’ve never been clubbing. Like what do I even wear, I don’t think I brought anything like that. And I’m not 18 for another month, would I even get in?”

“Well it’s a good thing we’re here isn’t it!” exclaimed Olivia, grabbing you by the wrist and dragging you to the clothes section. “Mills this would be PERFECT don’t you think,” she said as she held up a sheer black top in front of you. 

“Oh my gosh yes. With a black bra underneath and mini skirt,” Millie grinned, nodding in excitement with Olivia. 

“Guys I don’t know if I can wear this. Like I don’t think I can pull this off,” you said meekly. 

“Oh my god shut up this would look so good on you. Your body is killer and you can 1000% pull this off,” Olivia insisted, shoving the garment toward you. “And we’ll get you in the club no problem,” she added firmly, shutting down any possibility of you talking your way out of tonight. 

“Wait shit do you think Rafe and Topper will be cool with the pregame? We haven’t even properly met them yet and I’ve already invited a bunch of strangers to our place,” groaned Olivia as the three of you headed toward the register. 

“Trust me, if there’s two things those boys definitely don’t mind it’s a party and a reason to drink,” you laughed. 

—-

As the three of you unlocked the door to your flat you could hear Rafe and Topper’s voices from the kitchen. Ugh, back already. 

“Hellooo boys,” called Olivia with zero hesitation, walking straight into the kitchen. “Name’s Olivia, pleasure to meet you,” she smiled extending her hand. 

“Pleasure is all ours,” Rafe smiled back. It took every ounce of your will power not to roll your eyes at his smugness. 

“Indeed it is,” grinned Topper giving her a hand shake. “And you are,” Topper immediately drew his attention to Millie entering the kitchen right behind Olivia. You didn’t miss how his eyes ran her up and down. 

“Millie, your fifth and final roommate,” she smirked, not having missed his wandering eyes either. 

“So listen boys,” Olivia clapped her hands together, drawing everyone’s attention. “I may have invited my boyfriend and some of our friends over to pregame tonight before we all go out to the club. You guys are obviously welcome to join but if you’re not cool with us having people over just say the word and-“

“Done deal. What time should we be ready?” Topper cut her off

“9. See you then,” she grinned from ear to ear sauntering off to her room. 

“Alright I need to go unpack, but it was lovely to meet you boys, see you soon,” Millie smiled, eyes locking with Topper’s for a second too long before she too slipped away. You wanted nothing more than to escape to your room as well but you were starving, and since you were now living with Rafe and Topper you’d have to learn to go about your life around your new home despite their presence. You sighed as you made your way to the fridge, trying to decide what you were gonna scrap together for dinner. 

“So how long have you been here already?” asked Rafe, grabbing some Pringles and taking a seat at the table, Topper already spreading out comfortably on the couch. 

“Uh, few days,” you replied, not bothering to turn around. 

“See anything cool yet,” Topper chimed in as he scrolled on his phone. The way they were asking you questions was oddly normal. You were trying hard to detect any hint of cockiness in their voice but you couldn’t find any. You weren’t ready to let your guard down fully, not entirely trusting the pair, but you decided to soften a bit and give them a chance. 

“Yeah actually, I walked around Hyde Park the other day and the day before I watched the sunset from Millennium Bridge. It was beautiful,” you replied, finally turning toward the boys, a jar of pasta sauce in hand. 

“Crazy being in a city like this huh. Definitely not the Outer Banks,” Rafe chuckled lightly, gaze settling on the window. 

“Definitely not the Outer Banks,” you smiled. 

—-

“What do you mean you haven’t watched Friends!?” you let out an exasperated cry as you twirled more spaghetti on your fork. 

“It’s stupid,” said Topper, making a face. 

“It’s a classic,” you retorted. 

“No. The Office though. Now that’s a classic.”

“Should’ve know you were an Office guy,” you shook your head, Rafe laughing from his seat across from you. 

“Listen, I can’t help you if you don’t know how to appreciate true comedy,” Topper shrugged. 

“Yeah okay,” you rolled your eyes, turning now to face the dirty blonde seated across from you, absent mindedly shuffling a deck of cards for no reason, the golden ring on his finer catching your eye as his hands moved in a repetitive motion. “And what about you Mr. Dealer,” you asked Rafe, eyes motioning to the cards in his hand before going back up to meet his gaze. Rafe knew how to keep good eye contact with a person, confident yet not overpowering, and as the evening progressed and you become more comfortable you welcomed the challenge of his piercing blue eyes. 

“I’m more of a How I Met Your Mother guy,” he answered nonchalantly. 

“Huh, I wouldn’t’ve pegged you as that.”

“And what would you have pegged me as, Y/n,” he asked, still holding your gaze to which you just shrugged playfully, letting him wonder. 

“Okay, forget about comedies. Game of Thrones. Hands down best thing I’ve ever watched,” Topper stated, throwing his palms down on the table. 

“I mean I do hear good things, but I don’t know, seems kind of intense,” you said before shoving another forkful of spaghetti in your mouth. 

“No no no Y/n you literally don’t know what you’re missing out on, it’s pure genius,” Topper continued passionately. 

Rafe gave you a knowing glance as you two made eye contact again, trying not to laugh, “He’s been on my ass for years to watch it.”

“And now you have no excuse! It’s senior man, classes will be light work, just give it a chance,” Topper pleaded. 

“You know what Topper, just because you’re practically jumping out of your seat right now, I’ll check it out just for you,” you laughed as Toppers face pulled into a wide grin. 

“Good enough for me,” he said victoriously. 

“Lemme one up that Topps, I’ll also give it a chance, so it better be worth it,” Rafe added, Topper’s eyes growing wide in simultaneous glee and disbelief. Topper quickly got up from his seat, puffing his chest, “woooo! Winter is coming to London baby!” he exclaimed, pumping his fist before heading down the hall to his room. 

Two hours had passed by with you hanging out in the kitchen with Rafe and Topper, and to your surprise… you were actually enjoying yourself. You guys had talked about the things you wanted to do in London, the music you all listened to, favorite movies, and tv shows of course. You almost didn’t know how to process it. How could two guys who seemed like such kook douchebags actually be - cool? You had always regarded the two at face value, but perhaps there was more to these boys than what meets the eye. 

“Oh god how is it already 8, I’m so behind,” you groaned, getting up to wash your dishes. 

“Once Topper is full speed ahead, there’s no stopping that man,” Rafe laughed. 

“Hey,” you turned your head around from the sink, soapy dish in hand. “I was actually serious about giving Game of Thrones a try. Damn Topper if he didn’t make me curious now,” you laughed, “but I was thinking, if you’re actually gonna watch too, that we should time it so we both watch on the same days. Because then if we’re on the same schedule, whenever we see each other in the kitchen or something we can discuss and we’ll be on the same episodes so no spoilers.”

“So you mean we’d both watch on our own but at the same time?” Rafe asked. 

“Yeah,” you replied, as if it was obvious. That’s what you literally just described. 

“Well if we’re gonna watch it at the same time, we might as well just watch it together Y/n,” he calmly stated, walking right up next to you to put his Pringles away. 

“Uh yeah I mean that works too,” you replied, looking up at the boy now next to you, getting slightly flustered by his presence once again. His blue eyes were piercing right through you, and this time it was a losing a battle. 

“Cool,” he smiled, turning around and walking out of the kitchen to his room. You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding in, the water still running in front of you as you stood their holding the sponge like an idiot. What the fuck just happened?

---

Part 3

[littlespoonevan]

i think you’ve done one before where ian and mickey run into trevor? but i’d love another one like that. or caleb. or kash. or literally anyone from the earlier seasons (could even be an old school mate who we don’t know!) and who has a shocked reaction that they are still together/married.

anon said:prompt: ian and mickey introducing each other as husbands at a group event scenario

so because i combined two prompts here, have two blasts from the past!! (though idk who’s gonna be happy to see caleb lmao hopefully the 2nd guest makes up for it) i hope u like it!!! :D

*

Mickey loosens his tie as he scans the room, idlywondering when exactly he’ll stop putting himself in uncomfortable socialsituations for Ian’s sake. Then again, Ian walking towards him in his fancyblazer with the top few buttons of his shirt undone and a bottle of beer ineither hand is a very particular fantasy he’s enjoying right now.

“How’re you holding up?” Ian asks, handing one of thebeers off to Mickey and sliding his free arm around Mickey’s waist. It’s prettyfucking ridiculous how quickly it makes Mickey relax but he figures he marriedIan for a reason.

When Ian had first told him about the benefit all theSouth Side emergency services were holding to raise money for a new hospitalwing Mickey had thought it sounded like his own personal version of hell. Buthe’d realised pretty quickly it was also Ian’s personal version of hell so he’dagreed to go.

Now that he’s here he’s gotta admit it’s not so bad.The charming, confident persona Ian used to wear back when he’d drag Mickey toafter-club parties back in the day seems come back to his husband easily enoughwith Ian flashing everyone hundred-watt smiles and schmoozing with thehigher-ups. There have been a few moments where Mickey’s felt uncomfortablestanding next to him but only because of his total lack of understanding aboutall the medical bullshit everyone is spewing rather than him actually feelinglike he’s being excluded from the conversation.

Plus, he can’t help the way he inwardly preens everytime Ian introduces him as his husband.

“’m surviving,” Mickey tells him, leaning into Ian’sside. “This place’s got good beer.”

“Its one saving grace,” Ian jokes, dropping a kiss onMickey’s temple. “Sorry, I know you’re probably bored. Just another hour or twoand we can hit the Alibi.”

The last thing Mickey wants to do is stay out evenlonger when Ian’s standing next to him looking like he does but he hums in acquiescenceanyway. Not like Ian’ll be complaining later on.

“It’s fine, man, I get it,” Mickey says, turning intoIan so they’re facing each other and putting his free hand on Ian’s hip. “You’restill on probation and it’s a fuckin’ miracle your old job even took you back.You need to stay here and act like employee of the month – I know the deal.”

Ian’s beaming at him by the time he’s finishedtalking and Mickey clears his throat, aware his ears are probably turning red.

“You’re the best,” Ian tells him, the words half lostto Mickey’s mouth as he darts in to kiss him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Mickey huffs when he pulls away, tryingnot to act as flustered as he feels. “You can show me how much you appreciateme later.”

Ian’s smile turns devilish and he uses the arm aroundMickey’s waist to draw him in closer. “Oh, I plan to.”

Mickey’s just about to incite a game of chicken whenIan suddenly freezes and Mickey raises his gaze from Ian’s mouth to his eyes.Turning to look over his shoulder he attempts to follow Ian’s gaze but there’stoo many unrecognisable faces around for him to tell who Ian’s looking at.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, squeezing Ian’s hip to gethis attention.

Ian blinks, looking back to Mickey with an expressionthat’s some weird mix of panicked, apologetic and determined. “My ex is overthere.”

Mickey whips around again to look before he remembershe has no clue what Ian’s ex even looks like. “The firefighter?” he guesses.

Ian nods, offering him a tight smile. “Caleb,” hesays. “It’s fine, I don’t think he saw me.”

Which is probably the stupidest fucking thing Iancould’ve said because, of course, five seconds later someone’s calling out adisbelieving, “Ian Gallagher?”

Ian plasters a fake smile on his face and Mickeytakes a moment to pray for patience before he turns around to eye up the guymaking his way towards them. He’s attractive, in that clean-cut all-American way.He looks like the very definition of normal which Mickey knows just translatesto boring in Ian’s brain.

Ian had told him a little about him when they’dtalked shit through in prison. Said he’d been Ian’s attempt at a “normal”relationship that didn’t require all that much emotional effort because he’dpretty much been trying to haul himself out of a depressive episode when they’dmet. He’d also admitted he’d been trying to shove Mickey out of his mind at thetime which had hurt but he gets it, he thinks. God knows, he’d tried to drinkIan away in Mexico. It doesn’t hurt all that much now with Ian’s arm around himand Ian’s ring on his finger.

“Hey Caleb,” Ian greets half-heartedly when Calebreaches them and Mickey takes a drink of his beer to hide his laugh. It’s astark contrast to the enthusiastic friendliness Ian’s been sporting all night.

“How’ve you been?” Caleb asks, all earnestness thatMickey doesn’t trust for a second. “It’s been what? Nearly four years?”

“Yeah, I guess about that,” Ian agrees, voicecompletely neutral. “I’ve been good. I’m-“ he pauses and looks down at Mickeywith a smile that makes his knees weak. “Well, I’m married now,” Ian  says proudly, arm tightening around Mickey. “Thisis my husband, Mickey.”

Caleb’s mouth drops open in shock as his eyes flashto Mickey and Mickey immediately feels himself puffing up his chest. He’s readyfor whatever bullshit this fucker tries to throw at him.

“Wow,” Caleb splutters after a beat. “Congratulations.I- you’re his ex, Mickey, right?”

Mickey clears his throat and rubs at his eyebrow,pointedly using his left hand so he can show off his rings. “Not exactly his exanymore.”

“Right!” Caleb says quickly. “Sorry. You get what Imean, just- you two were broken up before.”

“Yeah, almost the biggest fucking mistake of my life,”Ian cuts in and he’s over-exaggerating a little for Caleb’s sake but Mickey canstill tell he means it. “No way am I letting him go again.” He directs the lastpart to Mickey and Mickey can only hold his gaze for a couple of seconds beforehe has to look away, throat feeling thick with emotion.

Caleb looks at a complete loss for words and Mickeyfeels privately vindicated. Yeah, gocrawl back to whatever hole in the past you came from, he thinksmutinously.

“That’s um- I’m glad you’re so happy,” Caleb says finallyand Mickey’s just narrowing his eyes to try and figure out if he means it whenhe hears another familiar voice calling his name.

“MickeyMilkovich?”

And Christ, Mickey never thought he’d ever be happyto hear a fucking cop calling hisname.

He promptly turns away from Caleb, hearing Ian’sexcuse of, “Sorry, an old friend,” before he turns with him and then they’reboth standing face to face with Tony fucking Markovich.

“Don’t tell me you’re a cop now,” Tony jokes andMickey had not expected him to lookso happy to see him.

“I don’t think they let ex-cons join the force,” hesays, blinking in surprise when Tony only laughs. Huffing an unsure laugh ofhis own, he nods in Ian’s direction. “Nah, I’m only here for Ian.”

“He’s my arm candy,” Ian cuts in, moving his arm fromMickey’s waist to drape it around his neck.

Mickey rolls his eyes but watches Tony carefully forhis reaction.

“Glad to hear you two worked shit out,” Tony says,looking painfully sincere, and since when the fuck did Tony the cop know theywere even together? “I was always rooting for you two.”

“I’ve got him locked down all official now,” Ianboasts, flashing his ring proudly at Tony.

“No way!” Tony exclaims, grin becoming impossiblywider. “That’s amazing, congrats! Let me get you two a beer later, consider ita belated wedding gift.”

Ian barks out a laugh beside him and Mickey is soconfused right now. “Hey, how’s your boyfriend?” Ian asks then. And what thefuck?

“We’re living together now,” Tony admits sheepishlyand before Mickey can stop himself he blurts out, “You’re gay?”

Tony laughs, rubbing his neck awkwardly. “Yeah, Ian hadthe same reaction when he discovered that little revelation a few years ago.”

“It’s Fiona’s fault,” Ian tells him conspiratoriallyand Mickey finds a laugh bubbling out of him unexpectedly.

“Dan’s around here somewhere,” Tony says, craning hisneck to scan the room. “Hey, how about I find him and we get that drink? I haveto hear the proposal story.”

“You sure?” Mickey scoffs. “It’s a long one.”

“Eh these things are always boring anyway,” Tonyshrugs, gesturing to the banquet hall at large. “It’ll keep me entertained forthe night.”

Ian snorts beside him and waves Tony away. “Go findDan. We’ll meet you at the bar.”

Tony nods before taking his leave and Mickeyimmediately twists to face Ian once he’s gone. “What the fuck just happened?”

Ian barks out a laugh, depositing his beer bottle ona nearby table to wrap both his arms around Mickey. “The cop that you used toterrorise as a teenager just saved you from an awkward encounter with my ex.That’s what happened.”

Mickey shakes his head in disbelief. “I’ve had a lotof fuckin’ weird social interactions when you’ve dragged me to this kinda shitbut that has to be the weirdest.”

Ian laughs again, hugging him close and pressing hislips to Mickey’s forehead. “Just accept the free beer and remember it’sprobably good for us to have a friend who’s a cop.”

“A gayfriend who’s a cop, apparently,” Mickey scoffs, leaning his forehead againstIan’s shoulder a moment later. “Tony better not cheap out on the beer.”

Ian rubs his hand across Mickey’s shoulder blades, breathinghim in. “Pretty sure he’s on better pay than both of us so I think we’re good.”

“Come on,” Ian says then, catching Mickey’s hands anddragging in the direction of the bar. “I’ll buy you a shot of tequila first tocalm you down.”

“I can think of something else that’d calm me down,”Mickey says pointedly, nodding in the direction of the bathroom and raising hiseyebrows.

Ian halts, sizing him up for a moment and Mickeyknows he’s won before Ian even opens his mouth.

“Tony won’t miss us for a couple of minutes, right?”

Mickey grins, triumphant, and begins towing Ian inthe opposite direction.

He could get used to these benefit things.

*

[marveloussupernerd]

Could I pretty please request Zen and MC ~platonically~ getting hammered together and just getting into shenanigans? I’m a ✨lesbian✨ and still reslly would love to have these characters as best friends, especially zen because he seems like such a ride or die. If I could have one wish it would be getting plastered with Zen and him making sure I don’t die. Thank you in advance and feel free to reject this one lol

Yes !!! Ofc I can do that :) also I have literally never rejected a request LMAO I’m here for your enjoyment. I’m rlly excited to write this bc everyone is SLEEPING on zen and also ?? The Zen friendship content in Jumin’s route? I’ll never shut up about how much I love it. Also I threw Yoosung in here too pls don’t hate me

Clubbing - Platonic! Zen

Warnings: alcohol (duh lmao)

Summary: you’ve had a rough day at work. Zen’s been meaning to show you around to some of his favorite bars. Zen’s responsible but also wouldn’t hesitate to punch a bitch if need be. Yoosung has to clean up after your messes

Oh! Also. PSA, I’m 19. So have I ever gone out and gotten drunk... no LMAO. I do drink (it’s legal where I’m at as long as you’re with your parents, still wouldn’t be able to drink in a bar though) but only enough to get buzzed usually. Anyway if this is inaccurate that’s why I am so sorry LMAO

You honestly had had the worst day today. It was a pretty bad week, truth be told, and you were so grateful it was the weekend. You texted Zen a lot throughout this week; the two of you had become close friends since the RFA party and hung out almost every weekend. Hearing all about your bad days, he suggested taking you to a bar to let off some steam and give you something to look forward to. You’d never turn down a drink.

You took an Uber to the bar, as did Zen. You expressed your desire to get plastered and Zen agreed wholeheartedly. You had never been to this bar before, but Zen swore by it, so you trusted him.

“Hey!” Zen exclaimed as he saw you get out of the car. He was leaning against the wall of the bar coolly, dressed in the leather jacket he must have pulled out of his closet from the time he was in a motorcycle gang.

“This better be worth the commute,” you teased, not letting him live down the fact that it took almost an hour to get here (primarily due to traffic honestly).

“Oh it will,” he had a giant grin on his face. “I’ve been so busy I haven’t been here in a while, but i doubt it’s changed.��� He pushed himself off the wall and made his way inside alongside you. “It’s right outside of a college so you get all the fun college students here.”

“Sounds messy,” you commented, glancing at some girls in skimpy crop tops and high-waisted shorts getting drunk already.

“Much better than bars for real adults. You’ve always got some guy moping over a glass of whiskey in those. Here, it’s all singing and dancing and getting drunk. Of course, I only come when I want to get completely hammered, but it’s always fun. The kids are nice too.”

It was at this point that you reminded yourself that Zen was only 23. He seemed so much older because he’s been on his own for so long, but nope, he was 23. The same age as a lot of the grad students here. So partying with them was not weird or creepy in any sort of way. In fact, the students probably were over the moon to party with someone so famous and, if they weren’t aware of who he was, handsome.

“So what do you typically start with here?” You asked, wanting to get the full experience.

“Shots. Classic move, especially for the med school students. You’ll see them soon enough. They start off with fireball but then make their way down to the cheapest vodka they have as they get more drunk and can’t actually taste it.”

“Let’s follow their influence,” you suggested. Zen went up to the bar and ordered some shots, bringing four glasses back with him. “Do they normally do two at once?” You asked.

“Nah, they’re way too broke for that. But I thought it’d be fun.” He handed you your shot glass and clinked his against it. You gulped down the shot, feeling the familiar fire burn in your throat. (I love fireball LMAO) You shook your head vigorously to counteract the burn, as though that would help, then looked back at Zen. “Good?” He asked.

“Perfect. Round 2?”

“Already?”

You laughed. “Well, it’s here isn’t it? The faster we can get drunk the better.”

You got drunk pretty fast. Zen was constantly handing you drinks, which of course you didn’t turn down. Maybe it was because the two of you hadn’t gotten drunk in a while, but this one hit you hard.

“Will you sing karaoke with me?” Zen chuckled, his cheeks flushed from all the alcohol in his system.

You laughed out loud. “Sure. I’ll even let you pick the song.”

You did not expect him to pick “Before He Cheats” but honestly? A banger of a song. Who doesn’t know all the words to this song?? “Hey, I’m Zen, and this is my best friend,” he slurred out, introducing you before the song started.

You sang in unison, the first instrumental break coming out. “This is for my asshole ex!” You cheered. The college students cheered with you.

“And all my old managers who told me I’d never make it!” Zen added. Everyone cheered again. You walked over to him, tripping on the microphone cord. He caught you a few inches off the ground.

“That would’ve hurt like a bitch,” you commented, bursting into laughter again. He helped you up and held your hand as you crossed over the wires this time, ensuring you wouldn’t get caught again.

Was your performance good? Probably not. Even Zen, who usually sang pretty well, was some sort of hot mess since he was so drunk. But the drunk students seemed to enjoy it, so you padded off the ‘stage’, proud of yourself.

Some dude called your name. Ew. Maybe Zen shouldn’t have introduced you.

Zen whipped around to face him. “If you so much as look at her right now I swear to God I’ll knock you into- Yoosung?”

“Hi!” You turned around to see the origin of the voice; it was indeed Yoosung. “You guys are kinda drunk.”

The two of you simply laughed, brushing him off. “What are you doing here?” Zen asked.

“Oh, well I live right down the street.”

“Oh my goodness you are a college student!” You observed keenly. You were connecting so many dots.

“Yup. Uh, I had an LOLOL event tonight but was super tired, so I thought I’d come and take a shot and it’d help wake me up. Never expected to see you two belting out Carrie Underwood.” He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.

“Oh! I have a great idea,” Zen exclaimed, focusing his attention on you.

“I’d love to hear it.”

“Why don’t we just crash at Yoosung’s place tonight? We won’t have to pay for an Uber at high time and get stuck in traffic!”

Yoosung’s eyes widened. “But-“

“That’s pretty smart,” you agreed, nodding. “What do you think Yoosung?”

“I-“ he sighed. “I guess it’s okay. As long as I can play LOLOL.”

“Yay!” You cheered. “We can go now. Lead the way.”

Yoosung hesitantly led you out to the street, walking ahead of the two of you, glancing back every few seconds to ensure you hadn’t died. Zen wrapped an arm around you and you one around him, and you stumbled down the street together, only slightly more stable than you would have been if it were just you on your own.

Luckily Yoosung lived on the first floor. You weren’t sure you’d be able to do steps right now. He unlocked the door to his apartment. “I only have like... a bed and a couch,” he muttered awkwardly. “But we can figure something out.”

You stepped into his apartment, looking around. “Wow Yoosung! This is cute as hell.”

“Uh, thanks, I think.”

You made your way to his couch and collapsed down on it. Zen did so on the other end of the couch at the same time, your legs bumping into each other. You both shifted so that your legs were on top of his so that it was more comfortable.

“Is that really comfortable? You can take my bed,” Yoosung offered.

“Nah, this is great. Will you get us a blankie though?” You asked. Yoosung left to go find something. Zen shrugged off his leather jacket. You were very happy you wore something comfy enough to crash in.

Yoosung draped a blanket over the two of you, his face bright red. “Is this okay?”

“Perfect! Thanks Dad,” Zen joked. Yoosung’s face got even more red, his ears heating up now too.

“Night Yoosungie. Don’t stay up all night,” you commented, shutting your eyes.

You heard something set down on the coffee table. Cups of water and Advil. He was too sweet. “I have class in the morning, so feel free to see yourself out whenever you’re up and ready tomorrow,” Yoosung said. “Goodnight you two.” He chuckled to himself. You and Zen probably looked like absolute idiots, but not that you cared. You had a great night out. Good thing Dad Yoosung was there too.

[lokisrare]

yours

PART TWO HERE

pairings: george mackay x ofc

word count: 1.8k

a/n:  this was going to be a smut but then decided to cut that part off lmao, just the teasing, k i’m leaving, bye love you.

Black and white. That was tonight’s theme at this place.

To say she wasn’t a big fan of this place would’ve been a lie, her most remarkable memories happened here; it had kind of a grungy vibe but with all the flashlights and the common dance music, it looked just like other night club.

“Sex on the beach?” The bartman asked. Miles. He was this incredibly tall blonde guy every girl wanted but yet, he was married, and to another extremely beautiful guy with asian features. It’s was like a race, she always thought, who’s the one who looks more like a god.

“Please,” she said looking at the group of girls going for another round of tequila while they all greeted Mary, the girl who she had come with. She just stayed behind to order her usual cocktail before arriving, tequila was just not her thing anymore.

“They’re gonna regret all those rounds tomorrow” Miles laughed a little while finishing her cocktail, “here you go, try not to ruin this for you too or you won’t be able to drink anything.”

She scoffed.

“Beer is always there for me.”

“Touche, Miss. Have a great night!”

Her teenage years where mostly a blur, the nights out and the illegal parties she got into with the five girls sitting a few meters away had their collateral effects, like not being able to even smell tequila and some other alcoholic beverages. Sometimes she’d wonder if a feeling of regret should go along with those memories but no, not even a little bit of shame; teenage years were made to leave freely and to explore and that’s exactly what she did.

“Danna!” A red hair got up from the table and -literally- jumped on her, the pink glittery veil she was wearing making her nose hitch as the girl hugged her, “I’ve missed you a lot, but like, A LOT.”

“Clara, you saw me three days ago.” Danna giggled. Clara was a lightweight but who could blame her, it was her last night as a not-married-woman as she liked to say.

Clara was a young soul and Danna would’ve never imagined she’d be the first one getting married but Kit came into the picture and things changed, he was a good guy and so much like her friend, a made-for-each-other kinda thing.

“Oh, right. But who cares I always miss you, we used to see each other everyday!”

“That was 5 years ago during high school, Clari.” Danna laughed while the red haired shrugged and took her arm turning both of them around.

“Ugh, doesn’t matter! Here are the girls! And those two there are my sisters in law.”

Danna greeted everyone on the table, they talked a little, the typical chat:

How are you?

How’s work?

How’s life, basically. And that was it, then the rounds of vodka started and after a few of them she could already feel a little bit tipsy, laughing about the stupidest thing.

“So, Danna” Lacey asked from across the table, “How’s George? When are we getting another wedding?” she asked and everyone around cheered except for her, of course, as she remembered the events occurred some hours ago.

“You’re acting like a child, Danna!” George shouted from behind as he followed her into the room.

“Acting like a child? I’m just asking for a little respect over here.” She turned on her heels looking at him with a death glare, “I’m fucking aware your job includes some kissing and stuff sometimes and I can take that, what I can’t stand is this stupid ass bitch throwing herself at you every goddamn time, even when I’M THERE. Does she even know you’re taken?”

George looked down at her. The tension was thick enough to cut it with a knife and right then she felt like punching him on his perfect teeth. Asshole.

“She’s 25 years older than me, Danna, and is married, do you really think she’s doing that? Of course you’re being childish, and yes, she knows you’re my girlfriend, everyone knows.” He said annoyed.

“Fine George, let’s put this the other way around because I think your brain might not be working right know.” George scoffed, rolling his eyes and Danna felt like showering him with curses.

“You go visit me at my work place and Logan’s there, you know I see him as a friend but he’d always wanted more, and he’s there and he’s touching my hair and winking at me all flirty and not so subtly inviting me out for a drink, what the fuck would you do, George, uh?” He just stared at her and then sighed, not knowing what to say.

“Exactly. Now if you excuse me I’m gonna go over to Mary’s to get ready there and while I’m gone, go fuck yourself, George. You’re childish.”

She felt someone snapping their fingers right in front of her face, now everyone on the table looking expectant, waiting for her answer. Ugh, she hated it. The whole attention thing.

“Uhm, we don’t know yet, George’s new project will take kinda long and now that I’m in charge of the magazine it’s not like we have the time to think about it. Plus we’ve only been dating for 8 months, Lacey.” Danna explained letting out a nervous laugh.

“Duh, I know, but you’ve known each other for like, what, for years now? It just took you guys way too long to realize you were head over heels for each other.”

Go to hell, Lacey. Danna wanted to disappear, she hated talking about her relationship and now everyone seemed interested on it.

“Yeah, I guess, you’ll be the first one to know if there’s a proposal.”

Lacey nodded, happy with the answer she got, letting out an ear-killing shout and then everyone just kept talking (screaming) while Danna just sinked a little on her place, she kinda regretted reacting that way with George but also the alcohol in her system told her he deserved it, so she grabbed the vodka shot in front if her and drank it.

George had a bad temper but so did she and even though most of the time they agreed on many things they were jealous people, the problem was that Danna accepted it, while he didn’t and she hated that.

Clara clapping got her out of the bubble.

“Fiiiiiiine, the boys are here, you know girls, Kit and I decided to end the night together, our not-married-yet celebrations joining, yay!” Clara cheered as she waved at her soon-to-be husband coming our way with other men behind him, one of those being George.

Oh fuck me, Clara. Why.

Almost too violently, Danna got it rid of her blazer, adjusting her lacy white top and her black leather skirt, she didn’t know why was she doing it, was she nervous to see him? like a fucking teenager? Obviously not, but she did wanted him to look at her.

When the group of men got to the table, they greeted everyone with a smile and that’s when George landed his eyes on her, down to her cleavage and staring little too much, the whole situation sending a shiver through her whole body. He stood there watching her like it was just the two of them.

“I love this song! oh my God! Let’s go dance people! Party’s on!” Clara got up taking Kit’s hand dragging him into the dance floor, followed by everyone else. Except for George and Danna.

She got up slowly, fixing her skirt. When she looked up, George was standing there and maybe if she still wasn’t so mad, she would’ve gone straight to kiss him right there because of how delightful he looked with those black jeans and the white half buttoned shirt.

When she tried to walk past him, George grabbed her arm bringing her back, their chests touching slightly.

“I’m sorry.” He said against her ear and Danna let out a sarcastic laugh. Maybe she was being childish now not letting the whole thing go but she was tipsy and he was an asshole earlier.

“I’m sure you are. You should, actually. Now if you excuse me I’d like to go dancing and celebrate with my friends.” She tried to let go of his hand but George was quicker and grabbed her by the waist to hold her still, pushing her against the nearest wall.

“Stop asking like that, Danna.” He almost growled.

“Like what, George? I’m literally just trying to leave to dance with my girlfriends.” Danna said looking at him with an innocent expression.

She knew she was pushing his buttons but it would’ve been a lie not to say the most pleasant thing to watch was him flustered, his cheeks turning carmine as he clenched his jaw, the veins on his neck showing and breathing becoming uneven.

Danna’s eyes closed as George lingered his lips against the crook of her neck, not kissing, not sucking just caressing it with his soft lips, earning a sigh from her. She felt so glad they were in a dark corner.

“I told I was sorry. I would never flirt with anyone and disrespect you like that.” George said with his lips still gracing her skin. “I like you, I’m yours, Danna. All yours.”

“I just hate that woman, I’m all about sorority but she keeps making it hard for me.” George laughed at her remark and Danna furrowed her eyebrows. “Don’t laugh, you idiot. It’s true. I just hate her touching you and looking at you and kissing your lips.”

Danna’s fingers went to his cheek so their faces were mere inches apart, noses touching. George looked at her lips and smiled looking back into her eyes.

“You look stunning, y'know? Absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking.”

George said and finally kissed her. Lips moving in sync as his hands held her waist tighter, Danna hands moving to touch his exposed chest feeling his soft skin. George bit her lip and that was it for the kiss to become more desperate, his hands traveled down as she pulled his hair a little too strong. The tension growing every second as they kissed in that dark corner feeling like two hormonal teenagers all over again.

“Oh sorry, I was just looking for my purse!” someone said making both of then jump.

One of Clara’s sister in law was standing there looking completely ashamed.

“It’s ok. Don’t worry, just making up here.” Danna shrugged it off and George giggled a little. The girl smiled shyly at the both of them and left quickly.

When Danna turned to look at George she felt like leaving the place right then, even though it was not possible since she promised Clara she’d stay till the end. He stood there, his hair a mess and cheeks red, his lips were swollen and stained with her red lipstick, his white shirt a mess.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer, sweetheart.” he said getting closer to her, he grabbed her throat and caressed the skin with his thumb, his eyes looking straight to her lips, “We’re going dancing now, and then I’m taking you home so I can show you don’t need to be jealous of any other woman.”

His hands gripping just little hit harder bringing her closer, so he could kiss her one last time.

“I’m yours, Danna. Yours.”

[ijustneedtowhine]

I realized I don’t want to work, so I won’t.

I feel like I‘m going to be judged for what I’m about to say. But I’m going to say it anyway. I kind of always wanted to be a housewife. Let me start by saying, I hate the term, “housewife”. It sounds like I’m a human pet or something. But moving past the stupid word, I always pictured myself homemaking, married or not. In school, growing up, when we would have to say what we wanted to be when we grew up I never ever meant what I said. I could not for the life of me think of a job I ever wanted to do. It sounds “lazy” but I never wanted to do anything. Don’t get me wrong, there were things I liked to do. I was a very active kid. I did a million different clubs, stage crew and color guard all throughout high school. I enjoyed it all. But I would be lying if I didn’t say that the second I thought about those activities turning into jobs, I lost all interest. Something about turning my hobbies into means of production, swiftly sucked all the joy out of it. I realize now that it was weird we were being taught to aspire to become workers. I just have no interest in living my life that way (doesn’t mean I didn’t try though).

In the beginning I did try to force my round peg into some of the square holes provided by our capitalist society. I went straight to college after high school. My second year in, I decided to turn my hobby of stage crew into a career path. One very big thing ruined this for me. In order to take the classes I needed like; stage lighting, stage makeup, and the opportunity to work on the crew, I had to major in theatre and take all of the acting classes. YEAH. You read that right. I had to freaking act. I have ZERO interest in acting. Very much not my thing you guys. The program director's excuse was that we needed to understand what the actors did as well. These classes were some of the most uncomfortable times in my life and I really wish I had never done it. Needless to say. that only lasted one and a half semesters for me.

One thing I feel like I should inform you of is that 2 weeks before I dropped out of college, my big sister, my absolute favorite person in the world, passed away suddenly. She had small children and an ex unfit to take care of them. My family and I were dealing with custody fights and a new life no one in my family ever wanted. Looking back now I know that it was incredibly traumatic for everyone involved and played a huge roll in why I left school.

Another hobby I tried to turn into work was makeup and skincare. I went to beauty school right after I dropped out of college. You see, even though I was able to convince my parents to let me leave school, they still wanted me to be working towards a career of some sort. So I enrolled into beauty school not fully understanding what I was getting myself into. Like I said, I am only interested in makeup and skincare. But here, at my school you had to also learn to do hair. My naive 20 year old ass trusted the enrollment lady when she said that I wouldn’t have to do much hair and that the program was pretty evenly distributed. LIES. Hair was 90% of what we did there. I fucking hated it you guys. I of course liked certain parts of it. The material was interesting, the tests were a cake walk, I made some friends, and even dated a girl I met there for a short while. But when it came to graduating to the salon and doing real customers hair for 8 hours a day (before going to my job where I worked 5-6hrs a day 6 days a week I might add) I was fucking over it. This on top of my ever blooming anxiety was a real recipe for me to avoid, avoid, avoid. My attendance was piss poor by the end. I got kicked out because of this. I wasted $20,000 on something that turned into nothing and ruined my self esteem. I felt like such a loser for not being able to finish. I could not for the life of me understand why I couldn’t get myself out of bed and go. Why would I cry at the thought of having to walk through those doors? I knew I had to, but I physically couldn’t after a certain point. So after beauty school I just kept working a shit-ton. I got a retail management job that I was at for a couple of years. I liked it well enough. Management was fun and I was good at it. The day I put in my two weeks notice I walked into the back to put my stuff away and my store manager and district manager were there with balloons ready to surprise me with the good news that I was being promoted. That was a pretty awkward conversation to have needless to say lmao. And to be honest I only left because I wasn’t making anywhere near enough money.

 The job I left for is where I met my favorite person alive, my sweet husband. We were in the same department and we started talking when I was new and had no clue what I was doing. He would help me out when I needed it but was too stubborn to ask. We would stand around and talk when there wasn’t much work to be done. I could tell he was really kind and funny, so one day I just decided I didn’t want to stop talking to him. I offered him a ride home that morning (we worked overnight). We went to a park to watch the sun rise and we literally haven’t spent a day apart since. He’s truly the loveliest person I’ve ever known. I can confidently say our relationship is the only good thing that came out of my first couple of years of adulthood.

This job is where I hurt my back, Christmas 2019. I was working 7 days a week 12 hr shifts and I was fuuuckkinggg exhausted. I lifted something wrong and that was that. My back hasn't been the same since. I’ve gone to chiropractors and nothing helps. I can’t even do the dishwasher without having to take a break. So obviously I had to stop working there. I lasted until august 2020 though! I used a back brace and took lots of days off lol. At the end I just could not do it anymore. My last shift I spent the last three hours of  my shift crying in pain and taking breaks to sit every 5 minutes. I walked out the second my shift was over and never went back in. I felt like I was ripping my body apart. My now husband, then fiance, and I decided that I should look for something to let me sit. I did that. It sucked. Depression and anxiety got the best of me once again and I stopped going. I don't know what happens to my brain but it feels like it starts to attack me with words, fears and feelings of despair. I shut right the fuck down. I’m not strong enough to push through. And I don’t think that I have to be that strong. Once I had enough break downs about being too scared to leave the house my husband and I decided I would stay home as long as it takes me to get better, physically and mentally. I love him so much for being on board and understanding that I needed a break. 

It’s been a couple of months now and I’ve had a lot of time to try and connect the dots in this pattern of my life. I think that I spent a really long time fully convinced that being a housewife in this day and age was out of the question. Deep down I knew it was the only thing I could ever picture doing and being happy with. I loved organization, lists, cleaning, and cooking. Growing up I always felt really good about myself when I cleaned and organized my room. I would sit around and day dream about what my home would look like and how I would decorate it. But none of that mattered when I was being told that I should aspire to do a job and love it enough to do it until I’m in my 60s. Like what? I don’t love anything enough, besides my family, to do it for decades of my life. When I finally admitted to myself that taking care of a home and a family is truly what I aspire to do, the thing that feels like it gives my life meaning, I felt a sense of relief, and then quickly after, some anxiety. I started to get scared of what people would think of me. I know that there are a lot of feminists out there that actually understand the ideal of feminism. They would never down a woman that is doing exactly what she wants (as long as she isn’t hurting anyone). But on the other hand I have encountered so many people, men and women that are really nasty about women that are or aspire to be housewives. So many of the people I grew up with joked about people they didn’t like ending up bored housewives. I know I shouldn’t have but I laughed along. Knowing deep down in a locked away place, it was the only thing I pictured myself doing. I just don’t see what’s wrong with homemaking if that’s what you truly want. 

Finally, I’ve come to realize that I shouldn’t be ashamed of doing exactly what I want to do. It works for my husband and I, and that’s the only thing I should truly care about. I picked the side of things that felt like home. Like they fit. The part that brings me satisfaction, joy, and the space to move at my own pace.

[lennox-levin-little-lilith-did]

Hi again people who follow me!

I’m bored and I’ve decided to make fun facts about our DID system and the four known alters!

So before I start- Lilith has a bit of a show today, but the body was too tired for her to start anything. Like I feel asleep as soon as I got to class. The reason I know this is because of my outfit and she decided to put on lip gloss (which I never wear personally). She’s not conscious currently, none of the other three are, and I’ll get to that later!

Oh! And just so you know, this is Lennox.

👋

Let’s start with Levin!

Levin is the alter that co-cons often or will switch with me

He knows a lot about our system, but is very secretive about it so~

He is the only male alter in the system that I know of

He also goes by Levi and Lev

He likes more soft songs and songs with a good message

His favorite color is forest green

He’s the only alter that Lilith does not take her anger out on

He’s an introvert with really bad social anxiety

He hates sexual songs (so of course being me, I put two of the worst sexual songs I know in his playlist, he doesn’t know)

He has insomnia and ptsd

He’s extremely competitive when it comes to card games

He likes educating people on animals and wants to do gigs, like birthday parties and events, to teach people about reptiles and birds specifically

His favorite subject is English

He is white with blue eyes and dark brown hair. He’s thin, well more twig like, but whatever. He’s around 5’8 (two inches taller than the body)

His clothes style is baggy shirts with either baggy sweatpants or leggings. He wear plain colors, like pale blues, grays, and black. He, surprisingly, likes boots, even heeled boots

His favorite anime is... probably Durarara x2 any season

He has no sexual desires, but romantic likes girls

He’s 18

He’s very comfortable singing, he loves it. That a major way he expresses himself

His favorite song is... I think LA Devotee by P!ATD (idk why but that what he likes)

^^ What he likes to wear ^^

Next on our list is

The demon queen herself, LILITH

She is named after Adam’s first wife, the demon queen, Lilith (yes she liked to go church, but we stopped going)

She is a bisexual

She’s ageless (she has no age, or if she does she hasn’t told anyone)

She’s an absolute bitch and she knows it.

She has violent mood swings and anger issues (respectfully so)

She is also an introvert, but not because of anxiety, no it’s because she wants to strangle every single person that looks at her weird

She hates Little with the burning passion

She gets repressed the most because no one wants to be expelled from school

She likes cooking

She hates cleaning because of her ocd

She wants to pursue a culinary job

Her favorite subject is science

She rarely fronts and when she does it’s quick or someone is co-con with her (ex. What happened with aleia-clownery)

Lennox(me) has to clean up her messes as always.

Her favorite anime is... The Promised Neverland (she likes Ray a lot)

She likes aggressive songs, or songs that swear a lot

Lilith has wavy black hair with blue highlights. Her eyes are a brownish red color. She’s short, like 5’2, and likes to wear heels because of it. She’s black as well

Her favorite color is dark royal blue

Her style of clothes is black shirts with skulls on them and tight, but comfortable, pants. She also likes a certain denim dress I have

She likes drawing and doodling ways to kill people and I have to say she’s pretty good

Her favorite song is Sarcasm by Get Scared (very fitting for her)

^^ What she wishes she can wear ^^

Next is Little!

She likes to bake

She enjoys going to restaurants, specifically Asian style ones

She’s loves animals and wants to work with them so bad.

She’s an extrovert with ADHD

Little is Hispanic and on the chunky side. She has a caramel skin tone. She can understand it way better than me (Lennox) and she wants to learn Japanese and French (I’m interested in Japanese so we’re probably going to learn it)

Her favorite subject was College Writing Prep and before that was Language Arts, but the writing part of it. She really likes writing

Her favorite color is... honestly black. She likes that it matches with everything and likes the science of black too

Her favorite anime is Ouran High School Host Club (I hate it with the burning passion) her second choice is Black Butler (any season) which we allow her to watch

She likes baking and cooking, tho she prefers baking, she likes the way it calms her, I guess

Her favorite song is Voices in My Head (she listens to a lot of nightcore so I don’t the artist)

I’m not saying much else about her (I don’t want creeps harassing her)

^^ What she prefers to wear ^^

Last, and certainly least, Lennox (aka me!)-

My favorite anime is Kakegurui or... BNA... or BNHA... or Hitorjime My Hero (My Very Own Hero)... or maybe Given? Idk I like a lot of anime...

The first anime I’ve ever watched was Wolf’s Rain. I was seven I think, but it was on YouTube so I didn’t get to watch the whole thing. I recently found it, but I’m afraid to watch it lmao

I like the colors teal and turquoise, as well as blood red and jet black

I like anything P!ATD, Halsey, Imagine Dragons, Fall Out Boys, Set It Off, Alec Benjamin, OneRepublic, and Nico Collins and AJR(granted so does everyone else but 🤷)

My favorite songs are Control by Halsey and Lonely Dance by Set It Off and Don’t Threaten Me With a Good Time by P!ATD and River by Ed Sheeran and Eminem and Not Afraid by Eminem and I’m Ready by AJR and Karma by AJR... I can go on for hours, but I’mma stop here

I’m Non-binary and the only gender nonconforming alter. I’m also pansexual

I hate being touched, I hate talking to people that act ignorant, and I hate this body I’m in

I look like the body so no description for you 😝

I have anxiety and depression. Everything else I’ve been diagnosed with can really be related to DID

I’m a neutral party in everything, so when I say I don’t know, I don’t care, whatever, or not my business, I’m literally saying I have no standing or opinion in this

I like cooking, baking, organizing (not cleaning), writing, reading, doodling, and doing self introduced projects for fun

I like plaid clothing, hoodies, and pride shirts. I like sweatpants and sneakers. I also like things on my neck... it keeps me ground I guess

(Oh my god I’m writing this with Ella, right? I told her to stop clawing at the furniture, right? All of a sudden her focus is on the ground and I wiggles my toes, testing if she was looking at my feet, and I started moving them around. I told her, ‘stop looking at my feet.’ This cat, this puta, liked me in the eyes before looking back down and got in position to lunge at my feet. My heart stopped and I pulled my feet onto the couch. And she was going to do it because the moment I moved my feet, she jumped from the top of the couch she’s on... she scares me sometimes 😣)

^^ What I would wear if Lev was a little shit and let me wear pride stuff and jewelry ^^

Now-

Onto how our system works!

Levin and I co-con often. If I’m not in control, then he is

On instances where I get angry, Lilith takes control

Little co-cons with me more than everyone else because she enjoys annoying me

Lilith and Little are both so stubborn and hardheaded, it’s unbelievable. On the other hand, Levs and I are open minded and calm. So we often clash on what we should do as a collective

Lilith is a Christian, Levi and I are atheists, and Little is a Seventh Day Adventist (the religion I grew up with). However Lev and I hold more say, so we don’t go to church

I guess you could say there’s a hierarchy in the system. I have the most important say, then Lev, then Little, and lastly Lilith

Levin and I enjoy co-conning with each other only, anyone else gives us headaches

Everyone loves Nico Collins, Alec Benjamin, Set It Off, and AJR the most

Everyone’s favorite albums are Death of a Bachelor (p!atd), Cinematics (set it off), and American Beauty/American Psycho (fall out boys)

Everyone loves sushi and sushi rolls (California and Philadelphia rolls are the best)

We all really want to try takoyaki and pork Katsudon. When we do try them, I’ll probably make a post about it

We all love Ella and we all want to start a rehabilitation center of all animals and a pet cafe

We love reptiles, like all reptiles, venomous snakes included

I think there are more alters that just aren’t as prominent as the other three, Levin would know but he doesn’t like to discuss our system often

We really want to buy these specific no pierce cuff earrings

Edit: this total slipped my mind- when I’m on my red week (you know what I’m talking about) the others let me deal with it on my own, especially Little and Lev (Lev hates that week and recedes completely)

That’s all I’m willing to share about us (or that I remember)

My part was short because you guys talk to me all the time

Sincerely,

Lennox... with a sprinkle of Levin

I’m tagging some people because why not-

@one-pissed-off-child @liveto-100 @madame-ree @martinidrinkingmartin @anon-nom-nom95 @queenzie-xo @scalybunnypapi69 @gogetyoselfsomesoup (still bitter) @cristinaweeb @aleiakit @aleia-clownery (I’m still so sorry about what happened) @studiesboie @bloomyboithatemoji @pumpkineiji @penelopebakugouburrito1

[maiaphaelsource]

I was the anon who sent you the trans Raphael headcanons ask on your other blog, do you have any more? With some trans Maia thrown in too🥺 like Magnus being the best trans dad to his son and the love of his sons life and being supportive and loving. Raphael kissing Maia on the forehead and telling her how beautiful she is, you know? Cute shit like that

yes!!! hello!!! i hope you know i love you and you're my favorite person in the world!! thank you so much for this ask!

okay so i’ll begin with the specifics... magnus is absolutely THE trans dad to both of them. not only with practical stuff like offering to help them with glamours, magical transitioning, stuff like that, but just... being so supportive and understanding. he’s always there, and he has so many stories to share, so many people he’s met who had happy lives. he was there for stonewall, he’s met Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, and it’s just so heartwarming for the both of them to talk to him about that, you know? that feeling of not being alone in history, of knowing that there are and were other people like you, that you’ve always existed.... it’s just great

also in maia’s case since she also lives a partially mundane life he just solves all her documentation problems like deadname? gone forever. no registers. you’re welcome. the first time maia sees her document with her name she almost cries and she throws herself in magnus’ arms and magnus is so touched and moved and shocked you know? like the gratitude and the affection and she’s just thanking him and he’s so moved and raphael just watches with a little smile in his face because he knows that magnus is moved by the display, even if he won’t say it. and maybe he tells magnus that later? like, “your kindness means more to others than you imagine,” and of course magnus isn’t important just because he’s kind but he’s used to not being recognized for his services (ahem especially by CERTAIN people) and it’s nice to see that being appreciated, you know?

plus, maia makes it a point to pay him and magnus is all like “i couldn’t possibly take payment for something like that. it’s the least you deserve” so instead maia teaches him her secret sangria recipe. magnus is super pleased but he also jokes that now he has one less excuse for inviting them over. and raphael goes, super seriously, “you never need an excuse” and magnus just melts 

raphael kissing her forehead! yes! tbh i think they both love forehead kisses (as well as hand kisses and shoulder kisses) and sometimes when she’s feeling dysphoric or upset for any reason she likes just... lying down on raphael’s chest and letting him pet her hair and kiss her forehead and tell her that it’s alright, bella, te quiero

and YES he just makes it a point to talk about how beautiful she is constantly and kiss down her whole body (not sexually of course, just sweetly?) and she giggles and it’s fun :’) sometimes things get to her, especially after jordan’s constant transphobic/racist rethoric, and it’s nice that raphael always makes it a point to tell her she’s beautiful and amazing and he loves her. and he always does it in such a matter of fact way, but also intense, you know? he has her close and he says shit like “you’re the most beautiful woman i’ve ever met” and she melts

as for general headcanons!

maia figured out she was trans relatively early in life, and it’s the reason she always knew she’d have to run away from her parents’ house. she was basically only planning until she had enough to be able to survive without them. but also, jordan and wanting to be able to “be with her already” rushed her out of home when she was finishing high school 

raphael and maia are absolutely willing to throw down for each other if someone’s transphobic and that’s that on that. someone being transphobic to raphael? fine, he can handle his own, he’ll end them with his words and do it with a pleasant smile. someone being transphobic to maia? they’ll be met with the usual cutting sarcasm until they back down. but if the other catches you doing that? you’ll be thrown against the wall and threatened/punched in the face so fast you won’t even know what the fuck happened 

a lot of baby trans downworlders start coming to them! they’re already an iconic couple for many reasons, what with being a werewolf/vampire couple, a black/latino couple (we need more black/latino couples okay! desperately! and black/native and native/latino too! i want more poc solidarity and romance!), and an iconique trans couple. people just feel comfortable going to them because they’ve brought so much change and are so accepting you know? 

it still surprises raphael, even after years on end, that so many people come to him for help with that. he never thought that he would be seen as the kind of person people can go to, and yet here he is. after being told for most of his life that he was cold/unfeeling/threatening/weird... it’s nice to be valued like that, to be seen as someone who can be soft and provide comfort and love, too

same goes for maia, who’s also used to be seen as agressive/violent for just defending herself and her people, and just generally reduced to being a “threat”. it’s nice to know that many, many people see her as someone they can look up to, and who they feel safe it

that is not to say obviously that they just love doing emotional labor for other people but like... having other trans downworlders, especially trans downworlders of color, come to them, feels nice. especially people who are trying to figure themselves out and approach them with so much hope and admiration in their eyes you know? the way they always come with a “sorry to bother, but..” ready in their lips and look at them like they are heroes... it’s really something

taki’s slowly becomes a place for trans downworlders to hang out, especially those who don’t enjoy clubs and stuff like pandemonium (which is totally a queer club as well bite me. including for mundanes. with taki’s that’s trickier of course since they have like, blood on their menu lmao but a few trans minors have hung out there and it was cool) for whatever reason. it’s just a cool queer-inclusive space for people who want to hang out, you know? and they love that

the first time maia saw raphael lose his cool was when a shadowhunter made a gross comment about how it’s lucky he didn’t want sex, so she wouldn’t have to deal with that. he almost tore their throat off

raphael just.... loves maia’s shoulders. she was a little self conscious of them, she always made a point to have them covered, but raphael just loves peppering kisses on her shoulders and making her chuckle 

magnus gives maia a bunch of fashion tips similar to the ones he gave raphael, just how to better protect herself and figure out how people are reading her gender and stuff like that, you know?

they do the thing where they show each other pre-transition pics (once they’re comfortable with that of course) just to hear each other be like “*outraged gasp* i don’t recognize you at all” and “oh, look how much happier you are now���, and my personal favorite, “i can’t see a boy/girl in there, i just can’t” (like personally whenever i see pictures of my partners/friends pre-transition i’m just like... i realize this is pre-transition and that you’ve changed a lot but also i’m unable to see an [assigned gender] in this photo). it’s all like “how did people not notice you were a girl? unbelievable” you know. just that sweet sweet trans couple validation ritual

together they have like. all the insufferable pun-happy sexualities (bi[romantic], pan, ace, trans) and you will be hit with those constantly in conversation if you’re a friend of them. raphael in particular greatly enjoys making those puns with the most blase, straight face as he looks straight into your eyes and watches as your soul slowly leaves your body. magnus is so proud and also afraid he created a monster

raphael is that bitch who’s like. “i heard that broccoli has a substance that’s similar to testosterone so i’m now eating 5 bowls of it” and maia wants to tear her hair out because it doesn’t work like that and he’s like “can’t hurt to try. also i’m finally able to eat let me have this” 

maia never got to like... celebrate those small transition moments because she was all alone and felt like she was transitioning in such a rush, you know? and raphael makes it a point to point out the small changes that are still going on with her body, to take her shopping and encourage her to be as giddy about it as she wants to, you know? and it’s nice and fun and he also gets to relive those small gender reaffirming moments and it’s really nice

maia is a huge against me fan!!! like not to project but it’s just... their songs are so great and relatable even when they’re not about being trans at all and laura jane grace’s voice is so beautiful and maia for sure absolutely loves punk, so like. it’s one of her fave bands for sure

she liked them since before laura came out and when she did it was like. oh. oh. so that’s why i always related so hard to her songs. it just... makes sense

while punk is not as much raphael’s style he likes true trans rebel, especially the acoustic version, where her voice just sounds mwaaahhh imo and he can listen to the recording for hours because her voice in there is just... sensorial heaven and maia feels all giddy that raphael genuinely loves a trans woman’s voice so much 

raphael always makes a point to say that he loves her voice just as much, too :)

they are just very trans and really love each other the end

[hoennislands]

This is gonna sound weird and a little selfish but oh my god I’m kind of dreading the pandemic ending?

For starters, the vaccine doesn’t even prevent you or other people from getting covid in the first place so im not sure why we’re celebrating and acting like it will end covid, especially with all these new strains coming out.

But also there’s this. So before covid, I had been job searching and kind of miserable because man job searching was hard. I didn’t really go out and do anything, mostly because I wasn’t allowed because my d*d is very controlling. But even before all that, I never went out and did anything. Sure I hung out with friends every now and then but I wasn’t allowed to be out at a certain time. During college I used to be sooo anxious about staying back after a certain time because of rush hour, I used to just go to class and go straight home after food and a short hangout. In high school, I couldn’t even hang out anywhere after the day was done because my aunt and my d*d would always make it into something. Specifically accusing me of going to some boy’s house, which I never even thought of doing because I was so riddled with anxiety whenever I saw male classmates/friends outside of school. I remember one time this guy saw me with my dad and called my name and I annoyed him and denied know him when my dad asked. When I was finally allowed to go straight home from high school (in my senior fucking year and I had to beg to do so) I had to call and text both of them when I left and when I got home. He used to watch the camera and wait for me to get home 💀

But anyways, tragic backstory aside, the point is that I wasn’t allowed to do anything, hence missing out on the Teen and College Experience ™ and regretting it to this day. Even after graduating and job searching, I still wasn’t. It was always you can do x once you graduate, once you had a degree, once you had a job. And that was always hanging out, dating, painting my nails 🙄. So with the pandemic, the world stopped and I didn’t need to worry about missing out on shit or the weight of those expectations on me. I could chill and do nothing and stay at home, also knowing most people were doing the same as me.

But now with things reopening and people going out again, I have no “excuse” to go out. I’m just worried about things going back to the way they were. Where I would watch people go out, live their lives, go on dates, hang out, party, travel and be jealous because I couldn’t do those things. Like...there’s a chance I’ll have to commute 2 hours to work in NJ I would be way too tired to do anything after work. I’ll just go straight home and do nothing afterwards like in college. I’m just gonna watch people on social media, wishing I could do the same. I still live with my mom and a considerable distance from the city. I have to commute and take that into account when I go places, how am I going to get home? How long will it take? Do I need to take an Uber? Will I leave my car somewhere?

Not only that but it’s just the anxiety of going out and doing these things. God, do I dread dating SO much, I’m nowhere ready for that but I’ll always feel so gross and miserable if I miss out on the experience. There’s the anxiety of going to a party or a club or a bar because god social interactions are the worst but I fear missing it out. Seeing people living it up and doing all the things I can’t makes me feel SO shitty and miserable and with the pandemic it made me feel better knowing people were in the same boat as me but when it ends I won’t have that. And sure it’s easy to say okay just go and do those things and I really wish it was so simple but there’s so many factors I need to consider before doing so and things that will hinder that, so I really don’t know what’s gonna happen to me. Like I really want to do those things, of course I do, and I will try to but I’m getting to my mid 20s soon and I already feel like I wasted my college years and early 20s and that I’m so behind of the people my age, idk how I can catch, especially when I have to consider things like my mom lmao, getting home, work, and it sucks. PLUS my d*d is about to be our tenant in the basement so THATS...gonna be fun...

It’s just about missing out and being behind of everybody else in my age range and older. The experiences I’ve already missed out on and feel now because I missed out on them that I don’t have to knowledge or comfort to “catch up”. I just want us to stay at home forever for self indulgent reasons 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴

[kweebtrash]

forthenight (M)

Pairing: Johnny x Reader

Genre: stripper!Johnny, pwp, one shot

Summary: I literally just wanted to write cute smut about Johnny and he so happened to be a stripper with a heart of gold and a dick that would leave anyone wanting more.

Features: blowjobs/eating out, making out, grinding, one night stands, cute and kind of slow sex, slamming that headboard against the wall, reader is shy and awkward because lmao same

Word Count: 5.5k+

Masterlist

I sighed as I exited the club, grateful to be rid of the smell of sweat and spilled alcohol. My friend had decided it was a great idea to host her birthday party at a male strip club and she was already wasted. I didn’t like babysitting drunk people especially when they were starting to get obnoxious. I wanted to go home but also didn’t want to be a buzzkill. I decided that a few minutes outside might recharge my social battery and I could proceed to pretend I was having fun. I leaned against the rough brick of the building and let the semi cool night air wash over me. Though the music of the club was still blaring it was much quieter outside and I was able to feel a bit at peace.

My loneliness was interrupted as I heard the metal door open. A man stepped out in nothing but a leather jacket and tight jeans on, his deep chestnut hair slicked back with sweat. I recognized him as one of the dancers who had been grinding on my friend just an hour or so before. He was beautiful to say the least and I think I had shyly tucked a dollar bill into the skimpy underwear he had been wearing. I watched his long fingers snap at a lighter and ignite the end of a cigarette that dangled from his lips. He took a few puffs, exhaling a little at a time and propped himself against the wall similar to how I was. It was awkward being so close to him and not speaking but how did I speak to a stripper? I mean they were humans too and not just entertainers but I was afraid that I wouldn’t have anything interesting to say. Would I flirt with him? Or ask him about the weather? Both options seemed like they would lead me down the road to embarrassment.

“So, are you the bachelorette or the birthday girl?” He seemed to be reading my mind and thankfully started the conversation.

“Oh…neither actually. I’m with a birthday girl but just as support. Mostly being D.D. I guess.” I replied.

“Well that isn’t fun. Though not being a plastered idiot is a rarity here, it is appreciated.”

“I’m sure you get tired of the ones grabbing onto you without permission and getting too rowdy. That’s how my friend is now and I just needed a break from it all.”

He nodded and hummed in agreement. “Yeah once my set was done I needed a break. It’s too hot in the dressing room and I’m sweating my ass off.”

“Shouldn’t you take off your jacket then?”

He smirked and raised an eyebrow. “So you are trying to see me naked.”

“No!No!” I said, my cheeks flushing vehemently. “I mean I have seen you mostly naked already but like… the leather would just make you hotter. It’s cooler out here.”

He chuckled and it was like melted chocolate, absolute music to my ears. “I’ll get there. So what are your plans for tonight?”

My eyes zoomed up to meet his. “W-what?”

“Are you going to stay here or go home? They can like take an uber.”

“Oh…as much as I would love too, I’d feel bad for leaving them. It looks like i’m stuck here for probably another hour or so. I’m hoping to chorale them.”

“And then after you get them home what are you going to do?”

I looked at him a bit confused but also curious. “Why do you want to know? Planning on following me and killing me?”

He flicked his finished cigarette away and stepped a bit closer to me, propping his hand against the wall. “No, of course not.” He shrugged. “Just that…you’re pretty cute.”

I rolled my eyes, believing that he was totally joking. “Yeah, right. I’m sure you’re literally required to say that to all your customers. I’m not special.”

“I think you are. What’s your name?”

I sighed. “Look, to be honest I don’t have that much more money for tips and I know you got a job to do. I don’t blame you at all but you don’t have to fake flatter me. It’s cool. I can ask my friends if they have more.”

“So, you think that all I want is money and to please women I don’t care about?” He said, eyes narrowing a bit.

I realized how poorly worded and offensive it came out. “N-no, i didn’t…i mean like…you’re an entertainer and I figured that’s what you were getting at. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” He pushed himself off the wall and grabbed the door handle, ready to head back inside. “Wouldn’t be the first time.” Just as he was about to leave I moved towards him, setting my hand on his arm. 

“Wait,” I introduced myself. “What’s your name?”

“Johnny.”

“No, like your real name.” I giggled.

“Johnny.” He said again.

“Oh…fuck. Then what’s your stage name?”

“JSuh. It’s nothing extravagant.”

“JSuh? Aren’t you supposed to be like Honey Rumpshaker or something.”

He covered his mouth as soon as he started laughing. “What the fuck?! Who would be named that!!”

“I don’t know! The girl strippers are usually like Cinnamon and like Diamond Sparkle or whatever! I didn’t know if it was the same for guys!” I tried to hide my face as I now felt like a complete idiot.

“You are seriously cute. Not just because I’m paid to say that. I like girls that can make me laugh.”

“Oh…well I’ve proven that I can make a complete fool of myself, so laugh away.”

“Nah, it’s fine. I guess I better get back inside though. We’ve got like a finale set that we do so I’ve gotta get ready.”

I didn’t know if I should really ask but I jumped the gun anyway. “Wait…why were you interested in what I was doing after I dropped my friends off?”

He turned towards me fully and shoved his hands in the pockets of his jacket, chuckling a bit. “I think you should know that already. And before you ask, no I don’t hook up with clients that often. It’s pretty rare actually but…” He shrugged. “I’m definitely attracted to you.”

“Soooo….you want a one night stand?” I asked. I always needed things spelled out for me when it came to any sort of flirting, relationships, hookups, anything. I was usually in disbelief that someone would give me the time of day thanks to my lack of confidence and I never imagined that a stripper would ever be asking me to hook up with him. But I found myself wondering what his lips felt like, what he tasted like, and how good he would feel inside me. From what I saw earlier while he was dancing everything seemed to create the illusion that he was good in bed, especially with those body rolls and floor grinds. I had never been jealous of a floor in my life but tonight was an exception. I swallowed my nerves and put on my front of confidence, accepting the fact that I was going to do something so brand new and out of my comfort zone. It was daring and exciting and I was definitely going to get my idiot friends home as fast as possible now.

“Yes? I figured you’d turn me down though, You seem like the goody two shoes type.”

“I am not!” I lied. “In fact, I’m down for it.”

His eyes widened in surprise but a sinful smirk crossed his lips. “What’s your number? I can text you whenever you’re done tucking your kids into bed.” Johnny pulled out his phone from the back pocket of his jeans and handed it over to me to input my number. I did and handed it back to him and he immediately called me.

“Why are you calling me?” I asked.

“So you have my number too. Just text me if you’re gonna blow me off at least.” He opened the door and held it open for me to walk through first.

“Don’t worry. I’m sure I won’t.” I placed a quick kiss on his cheek, unsure if that was even flirtatious enough. It seemed more childish than anything and I rushed back to my friends to grab them and get them home. There was no way I was going to let them ruin my fun now.

–

Getting them back to their respective houses was the biggest clusterfuck ever. I had to deal with puking, taking clothes off, screaming, and dragging them into bed so they wouldn’t fall asleep in the middle of the floor. Johnny was right, they were basically children and I was so ready to clock out from my babysitter shift. Once I was sure they weren’t going to choke on their vomit, I finally got home. It was late, almost past 2am and I wondered if Johnny would still want to come over. I was getting tired but my need to fall into lust was enough to send him a message to see if he was still interested. He didn’t answer right away and I didn’t expect him to but the suspense was killing me. I decided to shower to refresh myself. I reapplied some makeup so I could give the impression that I wasn’t half dead and tired. As I came back into my room I saw a few replies from Johnny and my heart thundered against my ribcage. He was ready to come over. He had finished his shift about an hour ago and went home to shower as well. It was a breath of relief and I texted him my address.

The wait seemed forever and I tried to calm myself from feeling too eager. Maybe it was the nerves that were taking over. I hoped I was good enough for him. It had been some time since I was last with someone; work, life, school, everything got in the way. I had no time for any relationship and instead focused on the important things in life. I did deserve at least one night of debauchery since the initial party for my friend was a bust to me. I flopped back on my bed and stared up at the ceiling. Shit, did I even still have condoms? I shot up and frantically ran to my dresser to see if the box was still there but there was a sudden knock on my door. I froze in panic as my brain shut down for a moment. I thought about continuing to look but I knew I would make a mess for sure. Obviously I still had to answer the door and the second round of raps shook me out of my funk. I sped over to it, fixing myself so I didn’t look frazzled and took a deep breath before opening the door.

His eyes raised up to meet mine and he pushed his hair back, the totally normal motion making my knees weak instantly. He wasn’t even wearing anything special, just a white t shirt and jeans, but for some reason it made him ooze sexiness and confidence. It could have been because I was more desperate than I thought or it could have been that he was actually bound to drive me crazy. “Hey.” He smiled, his perfect teeth shining between those plush lips. That voice got to me again and I wiped the sweat from my palms on my pajamas shorts.

“Hi.” I laughed nervously and stepped aside to let him in. He sauntered through the door frame and looked around at my apartment. He hooked his thumbs through the belt loops of his jeans and turned to face me.

“So…”

“So….um…” I figured he was going to take the lead being that he offered to do this in the first place. "Where do we start?”

“You’re not a virgin, are you?”

“What? Absolutely not.” Was I giving off that vibe? How did I show that I was a mostly experienced adult?

“Then what do you mean ‘where do we start?’ You know how this goes…” He wasn’t trying to be an asshole per say, but rather just confused and as tentative as I was.

“Aren’t you supposed to be some sex god or something?”

He snorted. “Oh my god, where did you possibly get that idea from? I’m a stripper, not a porn star.”

I wanted to facepalm myself. “I keep saying the wrong thing and I don’t mean to, I swear. I guess I’m just nervous.”

“I am too now that you think I’m supposed to be a sex god. Thanks for that by the way.” He smiled and nudged at me a little. He was trying to make me feel better and didn’t even seem to be judging me which I was thankful for.

“You don’t have to be a sex god, I promise. Just…” I set my hands on his chest and leaned into him, closing the space between us in mere seconds. His hands left his belt loops and instead held onto my waist, keeping me flushed against him. His lips were just as perfect as I imagined they would be- soft, warm, absolutely amazing at turning me on. He took his time too, exploring every inch of my lips in soft pecks and longer presses until he gave my bottom lip a light nip. My fingertips dug into his chest as I parted my lips, letting him carve out pleasures when our tongues collided. Each stroke and small suck against mine made my body ache more and more and I was already wanting to take him to my room. I was edging him back with careful steps, trying to guide him towards my room, but with my eyes closed and being distracted by his heated kisses, his thighs hit the armrest of my couch, sending him into the cushions with me on top of him. “Oh fuck!” I cried out.

He just laughed and adjusted himself, his entire body filling the length of the couch completely. “It’s cool. I’m a klutz too." 

"I’m sorry! I was trying to get you to my room and-”

“It’s fine,” he stopped me. “Let’s just stay here for a bit.”

I fiddled with my hair and nodded, hoping that I didn’t ruin the mood too much. I pushed along, trying to recover, and wiggled between his thighs. The center of his jeans seemed to be a bit more filled out than before. I set my hands on his waist, my fingers dancing around the button of his fly. I could feel him staring, his bottom lip caught between his teeth in an almost innocent way. He was waiting for me to snap out of my stupor and pull away the fabric that separated my mouth from him. I finally unbuttoned his jeans and edged the zipper down. He hooked his thumbs within the waistband and slid them down, moving his legs around me to get them off completely. My heart almost stopped when I saw the dark boxer briefs and what laid beneath them. “Jesus…” I whispered.

He grabbed my hand and guided me back to his lips, making me straddle him. The center of my shorts was flush against him now and I could feel the slight pressure against me. “I’ll only be as rough as you want me to be.” He whispered.

I combed my fingers through his soft hair, pushing it back slightly. “Don’t worry about me, I think I know what I want.”

“Then maybe you should lead and I’ll follow.”

I pressed my lips together and grabbed his hands to settle them back on my hips. I started rolling them, creating more friction between us like misguided teenagers trembling with the prospect of getting off. He kept control of the pace while I zeroed in on his lips again, diving my tongue in to feel his warmth and hunger. He let out a soft groan and pressed his fingers into my ass, increasing our speed ever so slightly. I kept my hold on his hair, curling my fingers and pulling every once in awhile and following it up with sweet scratches and caresses. He would respond to the pulls, bucking his hips and leaving me breathless. I parted from him to gulp down air and he took the opportunity to toss his shirt off. Now that I was able to touch him on my own and take my time I realized I wanted to toss caution to the wind and mark every single inch of him. I crept my kisses from his lips down to his neck, slipping my teeth beside his adam’s apple. He jerked away quickly.

“As much as I would love to, I can’t. No scratches, bites, or hickies.”

I pouted. “Well…that’s no fun.”

“I know, I’m sorry. Part of the job, but I can definitely do it to you. Leave a little calling card for you to remember me by.” He slipped his fingers under my tank top and nudged it up to my chest.

“You have to make it memorable first.”

“Oooohh, really now? That’s how it’s gonna be? I see how it is.” He said as he jerked my top upwards and I moved my arms out of it. “What’s the sudden change of attitude, hmm?” he teased.

I slid off him and started walking towards my bedroom, trying my best to entice him. “You gonna get over here or what?”

Johnny practically jumped off the couch and sprinted towards me, making me giggle. I tossed off my shorts and crawled onto my bed, pulling him to the edge. I placed kisses from his chest, down to his stomach and over the outline of his cock through his underwear. I heard him exhale above me and settle his large hand into my hair to keep me close. I peeled away his briefs and let him free, swallowing hard as I saw him fully. See him in that barely there outfit at the club left little to the imagination but seeing him hard and needy now had my stomach filled with fluttering butterflies. I gripped his base gently, guiding him to my lips. I poked my tongue out and licked around his head, dipping the tip into his slit. 

He let out a soft grunt and relaxed into my touches while I struggled to take down more of him. My mouth was already much too full but I hollowed out my cheeks as best I could, adding firm pulls to what my lips couldn’t reach. I could tell he was trying not to force his hips forward but the tension in his thighs gave away his struggle. With my free hand I traced up the length of his torso, gripping his firm pec and leaving behind the faintest of scratches. I didn’t mark him though I still wanted to. His hand came to rest over mine and I felt his lips against my fingertips. My eyes opened and I looked up at him surprised by the tenderness of his action. He only smirked and wiped the corner of my mouth with his thumb when I released him. “Cute.” Was all he said.

My cheeks flushed at the praise and buried my face against him, concentrating on laying open mouth kisses and soft sucks to his balls. It seemed to elicit a pleased reaction as his hand gripped my hair harder and his breathing quickened. I took one between my lips and tugged against it with my tongue, giving generous licks in between. I paired it with steady massages and gropes, bringing him to rise on his tiptoes just a bit. He folded his fingers into mine while the hand in my hair shifted to grab onto my shoulder. I thought he was trying to support himself but instead I was pushed back flush against my mattress. He crawled between my legs and settled by the center of my thighs. Instead of giving me attention right away, he took his sweet ass time decorating my inner thighs with long kisses and shallow bites.

I noticed his hand was still tangled in mine and he was squeezing every so often, usually when his teeth sunk into me. My heart lurched at the warmth he generated and I could barely hold in the soft moans he was bringing out of me. He hadn’t even touched me where I needed him the most yet and I already was becoming all too greedy for my liking. He swerved around me once again and instead brought his kisses up my hips and to my stomach, laying bites by my ribcage. When he reached my chest there was no end to the attention he gave my nipples, bringing them between his teeth to nibble slightly or suck deeply to make my back arch against him. While I was distracted by the intense kisses his fingers managed to slip between my folds and explore how turned on I truly was.

I pressed my lips to the back of my hand to suppress a gasp when two of his lengthy fingers dove into me. He pumped them slowly at first, curling the tips every so often and exploring sections inside me to see what would give me the most pleasure. My own fingers trembled as they wrapped around my bed sheets. I was desperate to find a way to calm myself; there wasn’t any reason to let go so soon. I wanted to savor every moment I had with him. It felt so good to have someone else touch me after so long that I never wanted it to end. His touches were pure energy and I had forgotten all about my tiredness and instead focused every thought I had on the way the first dip of his tongue rolled over me.

My hips squirmed against him and he settled an arm over my waist to keep me in place. It didn’t phase him at all and he continued coaxing more of my wetness out of me and working soft circles against my clit. He mixed in heated kisses and flicks and I finally moaned out his name, louder than I would’ve ever thought possible. He practically growled into me, yanking the back of my thighs to sit on his shoulders and letting his tongue take over where his fingers were seconds before. My toes curled against the center of his back while he seemed perfectly content having my thighs quiver around his head. He pulled out of me and switched to long licks from my entrance to my clit, hungrily carving out new ungodly tremors of pleasure within me. I rolled myself against his tongue, meeting every lick and silently begging for him to eat me out until my mind went numb.

He set a gentle kiss on my clit and I could feel him trying to edge away. My hand dug deep into his locks and kept him close, pleading for him to continue. He chuckled, the soft puffs of air adding to my sensitivity, and took my hand in his. “I promise I’ll be right back.”

I groaned and tossed my head back onto my pillow, wondering what was so important that he needed to stop just when it was getting to the good part. I realized that he was most likely getting a condom and almost kicked myself. Well, duh, idiot. I adjusted myself in bed, contemplating getting under the covers or not. I pulled them to my chest just as he came back and sat in front of me. “Why are you hiding from me now, hmm?” He teased with a gentle smile on his face.

“I’m not hiding.” I lied. “It’s just a little brisk now, with the window open and all.”

“Mhm, brisk. Sure.” He pulled the blanket away from me and slipped between my legs. “How about you hold onto me instead? I don’t need you trying to cover up anymore.”

I bit my lip and bowed my head towards his chest in an attempt to hide. I settled my arms around his neck while he rolled on the condom and pulled me close. Our eyes caught each other for a moment and we exchanged small smiles before we met again for a slow kiss. As he baited me with his perfect lips, his hand moved between us, guiding him towards my entrance. He pressed in slowly, stopping as he heard me wince a bit. “Are you…okay?”

I nodded and shifted beneath him. “S-sorry.”

“No, no, it’s okay. I’m pretty patient and can go all night.”

“Oh…”

He chuckled nervously. “I didn’t mean for that to come out as cocky as it sounded.”

I eased my hips down onto his tip, flexing my walls against his girth. “W-well, if you can live up to that then I’m all for it.”

He set his hands on my hips and pushed in deeper, inch by inch until he disappeared inside me completely. I clutched onto him tighter, curling my legs around his back. He placed kisses across my cheek and towards my ear. “I can live up to it.”

The first few thrusts were slow and steady, getting me used to his girth that seemed to stretch me more than I was prepared for. I guess going for so long without any physical connection with someone made it a bit difficult for him to plow me into oblivion like I wanted. I closed my eyes and let him cover my neck with kisses and bites that trailed to my breasts. His tongue rolled over my nipple again, gathering it between his lips and letting out a soft moan. The sound of his arousal vibrated through me and I clutched at him tighter. “Please,” I begged. “M-more.”

His hips snapped then, a rush of pulling out almost completely and forcing his way back in to make my body arch against his. I rolled my hips in time with his thrusts, burying my moans into his chest. His hands curled around my waist, lifting me slightly to work himself deeper. My legs tensed as he hit where I needed him the most. The slight curve of his cock pressed into my walls, every contour and vein adding onto my impending orgasm. I wanted to hear more of his soft pants and groans that decorated my chest. He bit into the swell of my breast slightly and I grabbed a chunk of his hair, tugging hard and blaring out that he had hit something so beautifully electrifying within me.

I was trying desperately not to mark him, my fingers flexing to stop my reflexes. I tried to keep them in his hair. He seemed to add a particularly hard snap of his hips when I pulled, a delicious and quiet moan coating my ear. He was buried beside my head, not looking at me any further but I wanted to see how perfect those honey brown eyes looked when they were filled with lust for me. I grabbed his chin and forced him to me, pressing our foreheads together and reaching my tongue out to slide into his mouth again. To my surprise he lifted me then, keeping inside me as he trapped me between the wood of my headboard and his body. He gripped the top of it while he plunged rougher than before. My throat was starting to feel just a bit tender from moaning out his name so much but this was driving me wild.

My legs splayed to the side as the wood clattered against my wall with each rock of the frame. My breath was barely able to escape my lungs as my body clenched around him, tight and suffocating as I needed him at that perfect spot. He took the hint and focused on it, working through my clamped walls until one final thrust sent me over the edge. My knees dug into his sides as my body tensed in pleasure and he seemed unfazed by it all. He kissed me hard, digging his free hand into my hair and pulling me close. His blunt nails burrowed into my scalp as my hips felt so utterly tainted with bruises. He was ruining me, all in the name of getting off and I craved to feel his warmth within me.

He let out a harsh curse, shoving the headboard back hard and stilling within me. I felt the throbbing and the flow of him emptying into me. His torso trembled just a little and he went back to his safehaven of my neck, that unexpected shyness returning. It was strange that he could practically ruin my bed yet hide from me. Just like he hadn’t wanted me to cover up before I wanted to see the flushed look on his golden skin. I nudged him towards me for a few gentle kisses that bought out a cute and dorky smile that made my heart fumble to keep a perfect rhythm.

“What do you have against my headboard?” I teased.

“Well currently, you.” He smirked. “Seems like you enjoyed it.”

“Very much so.” He surprisingly kissed my forehead before he pulled out, rolling off the condom and tossing it into the nearest trash can.

“Do you mind if I have a smoke?”

I shook my head as I crumpled down to the mattress, wanting to rest my sore body. “Have at it, hun.”

He smiled and got out of bed while I closed my eyes and fell asleep faster than I had intended.

–

I rubbed my eyes and yawned deeply, annoyed at the bright sunlight spilling through my blinds. I had forgotten to close them last night as I was letting fresh air in and regretted it. I propped myself onto my elbows and noticed a heaviness beside me. Johnny was face down, buried in a pillow with his limbs splayed everywhere. I didn’t expect him to stay over but it was a little endearing that he did. I gave him a soft kiss between his shoulder blades and got up from bed, pulling on the robe that was hanging on the back of my bedroom door. Coffee was a necessity and I worked to brew a pot as fast as possible. It was only a few minutes into me deciding what I wanted for breakfast that I heard the creaking of my kitchen tiles. Johnny was standing in the door, a sleepy look still on his face and hair an absolute mess.

He had tossed on his jeans carelessly and yawned loudly. “I didn’t mean to stay over, so sorry about that.” His voice was still raspy with sleep.

“Don’t worry about it.” I bite my lip and reintroduced myself, figuring he might have thought I was unmemorable.

He gave me a confused look. “Trust me, I remember. I don’t think I could actually forget.” His attention turned towards the coffee pot. “Mind if I have some before I go?”

I quickly grabbed a mug from my cabinet and poured him a cup. “How do you take it?”

“Black is fine.” He took the cup from me and blew over the liquid a few times before taking a sip.

I scrunched my nose up in disgust. “I don’t know how you do that.”

He shrugged. “Use to it I guess. I have plenty of long nights.”

“Ahh, right the dancing, duh.”

“That’s only on the weekends and a day or two during the week. Mostly I stay up all night grading.”

“Grading?” My interest peaked. “You’re a teacher?” I was definitely surprised.

“Mhm, well student teacher getting my hours in. I teach photography at the art college downtown.”

“Holy shit.” I whispered. “Sorry! I didn’t mean it like that! I just…”

“Yeah not all strippers want to do this for the rest of their lives, you know. I want to quit soon but I just need the money to keep up with bills. It started as a joke but I had a friend at the club and he roped me in. Been doing it for a couple years now.”

“Wow, that’s…that’s really cool actually. The photography thing. I mean the dancing is cool too! I’m sorry. I’m still half asleep but always an idiot.”

He chuckled. “Nah, you’re totally fine. You’re cute when you’re flustered.” I almost turned away to hide my blush like a schoolgirl at the playground. He set the mug down on the counter and sighed. “I should be heading out now.”

“O-oh, right. That.” I didn’t want him to leave but I had to understand that this wasn’t a fairy tale and he wasn’t going to be my prince charming. “It was nice meeting you.”

Johnny bit his lip then chuckled a bit. “Definitely. Don’t lose my number ok?” He left the kitchen then, heading back to the living room to finish getting dressed. Did he want to hook up again? I wanted to ask him directly but the front door opened and shut before my brain could make my body move. I sighed as I rested back against the wall. Maybe for the night he was some sort of prince charming…or at least a sex god.

[horizonmoonfics]

Pairing: Namjoon x Y/n Genre: Flansgt (it wasn’t fluffy enough to be fluff, but it’s not really angst so just. Flangst?) Word count: 2k Warnings: you are very unproductive. Tags: @cypherwritersnet​ 

“Melanie, for the last time, I can’t make it today. It’s my cousin’s birthday. I’ll catch up with you some other time.” “Okay fine, but we’re bringing Ainsley next time, alright? Magic Shop at 7 PM on Tuesday.” Melanie sounds stern, but you know she’s not entirely serious. No one’s gotten Ainsley out of her room since she broke up with Chad. “Alright fine, but if we manage to get Ainsley to see actual sunlight, you’re paying.” “Deal.”

You hang up the call, wondering how you got yourself into this situation. You put on your jacket and head out of the dorm, on the way to your aunt’s house. A few hours of chattering with your relatives and gossiping about your older cousins while the younger ones run around and eat cake will be enough to distract you from the fact that you’ve been behind on your work for three weeks. You head on over to your cousin’s house, parking your car next to the sidewalk. You step out and walk up to the door, and before you can knock, it opens, and your cousin runs out and hugs you. “Y/N I’VE MISSED YOU SO SO MUCH OMG! How have you been? How’s school? Are you seeing anyone? We have so much to catch up on!” your cousin Laurel squeals. “Laurel, calm down. It’s only been a month!” “STILL. Now. How’s school? Are you seeing anyone?” Laurel continues, eyes burning into your skin. This interrogation lasts for another ten minutes before she remembers that you two are standing outside, and then invites you in. A few hours of chattering with your relatives? More like six hours from 1 PM to 7 PM being bored to death while Laurel flirts with her boyfriend.

                                                   ~The Next Day~ It was Tuesday. At 6:59 PM. In the Magic Shop cafe. Waiting for Ainsley. Melanie, Skylar, and you were already there. It was raining, and it was raining pretty hard. The bell at the entrance to the cafe jingled, and you looked up, seeing Ainsley walk through the door. “So we finally got Ainsley out in public? I’m impressed,” you say, with a small chuckle. You are actually impressed, but also dreading having to pay for everyone’s coffee. “Don’t count on it happening again, I’m tired and I have homework.” Ainsley sighs. “Well, we might have to let your grades slip a bit. When was the last time you met someone?” Skylar says, adjusting the sleeves of her blazer. “It hasn’t been that long…” Ainsley drifts off, as you and your friends look at her. None of you believe anything she’s saying. “Okay maybe it’s been a while. So what? I can take time to focus on my studies! That’s not a bad thing to want.” “No it isn’t, however you were miserable after you broke up with that last guy. I can’t remember his name and no don’t you dare say it he is taboo. You spent three months sulking. And now you’re drowning yourself in essays. Take a freaking break girly,” Melanie says in her dramatic it’s-the-end-of-the-world voice, her hands on her hips. “Melanie I am not drowning myself in essays! I only have three due this week-” “And you had seven due in the past two days we are not taking any bullshit about not having much work.” You say, placing your phone down on the table and sighing. “We want you to go out more, to socialize. Maybe meet someone. At least revive your social life a little bit. Seeing someone who you can casually hook up with will be better than hiding in your room and only emerging for classes.” “There is merit to y/n’s words, Ainsley. Meet someone. Get dick. Don’t attach yourself if you don’t want to. Whatever. Just get out of the house.” Melanie said, then added, “but we should get coffee first. I mean, we’re here, aren’t we? It’s a coffee shop.” Everyone laughed, then sent you to grab a few drinks and some cookies. You shook your head, chuckling as you walked to the counter. You thought about Melanie’s words a little bit. Hooking up? It wasn’t really your type of thing to do, but maybe Melanie’s advice could apply to your worries as well. Though, you had enough on your plate already, so maybe not. When you returned to the table, you gave everyone their drinks and they began to talk about what they’d been up to the past week. “Oh also, you know that new club that opened up on First Street? I went there with some classmates the other day. I may have met someone…” Melanie says with a wink. “Who? Who? Why haven’t we met him?” said Skylar, pouting about being left out of the loop. There wasn’t a loop though. “Calm your tits Skylar, I’m about to tell you. His name is Kim Taehyung, he’s chill, and he’s pretty cute. He had three friends with him, I don’t remember their names though. And I’ve only known him three days, he hasn’t met anyone.” Melanie laughs, patting Skylar’s shoulder. “I think we should pay that club a visit. What’s it called again?” you say, genuinely interested. You think you know what place she’s talking about, the House of Cards club. It was kind of like a coffee shop that sold booze, and it was a great place to meet just about anyone. “House of Cards. Do you have any reason in mind to go?” Melanie asks, but all four of you already knew there was one reason to go. “No. No no no. I am not meeting your Kim Taehyung and his friends.” Ainsley says, wincing. “I do not go clubbing.” “It’ll be fun! Let’s go.” Skylar gets up, grabbing Ainsley’s wrist. You all head out the door, about to set foot in what will be the starting point of the most interesting night of your lives. About twenty minutes later, you’ve walked into the House of Cards and not only found Taehyung, but met six of his friends. They all seem nice, but you’re pretty sure you’re not going to talk to all of them today, especially with the way Ainsley is eyeing Seokjin. You sit down next to Namjoon, who seems to be the quietest. He’s wearing black glasses, jeans, and a pink shirt that says “Don’t Waste Your Time.” He doesn’t seem to be the type to waste his time, and you hope that rubs off on you. You need to get a leg up on studying. “Hi, I’m y/n.” You say, reaching to shake his hand. “Hi y/n, I’d introduce myself but you already know my name. How’s life?” He asks, shaking your hand. You smile, and say, “It’s pretty good, other than overwhelming schoolwork, you know?” You mentally slap yourself when you remember that you actually do have overwhelming schoolwork, and that you weren’t just making a joke. “Ah yes. Schoolwork. Honestly I think this is probably the most stressful time of the year, especially with exams coming up.” Namjoon agrees, and you take a mental note to check which exams you have next. “Yeah. Do you have Professor Sejin? I hear he’s going to have a really long essay portion.” You ask, curious to find out how he’s going to cope with exams. You really do need some study tips… “Oh jeez… Yeah, I have him. You?” “Yep. I’m in his second period class.” “Dang. Early. He hasn’t said anything to our class, how did you find out about the essay length?” He pushes up his glasses, all attention focused on you. “Some of my friends had him last year, they say his essay requirements never change. Figures that he’d be a teacher that doesn’t let up, you know?” “Yeah. None of the older ones do.” You both laugh, and Namjoon asks if he can get you a drink. You say yes, and ask for a coffee because you know you’re going to be driving tonight. You two talk for a few hours, only interrupted a few times by Melanie and Taehyung leaving (to do who knows what), Ainsley laughing at Jin’s jokes (and telling you that Jin was off limits… maybe she will be getting over Chad tonight), and by Jimin’s insistence on buying everyone another round of drinks. You and Namjoon both declined, preferring coffee to alcohol. Eventually, you check the time and realize you have a lot of studying to do. “Damn, it’s nearly midnight.” You say, looking at your watch. “Wow. Yeah, it is. Do you want a ride home?” Namjoon asks, getting up with you. “Ah, no thanks, my car’s at Magic Shop. I’m going to walk over there and then drive home.” “Okay. Can I walk with you? My car’s a few blocks away, so I’ll probably be heading in the same direction.” “Sure,” you say, smiling. He’s nice. When you get to his car, you turn to him and see that he’s taking a pen out of his jeans pocket. Upon seeing your look of confusion, he smiles shyly. “I was going to ask for your number,” he says, “but you don’t have to give it to me if you don’t want to.” You smile, and take out your phone. “I think there’s an easier way to do that than writing on my arm.” He laughs, and pulls out his phone. After the exchange, he bids you good night, and you do the same before he drives off, in the direction of campus. You get home about twenty minutes later, and get a text almost immediately after walking through the door.

Kim Namjoon: Hey 12:03 You: Hi 12:05 Kim Namjoon: Do u want to study together tmr? 12:05 You: Sure! If it doesn’t bother you, of course. 12:05 Kim Namjoon: Lol 12:05 Kim Namjoon: I wouldn’t mind, + it’s a good chance to get studying in 12:06 You: Alright lol 12:06

You finish making plans, and you sigh happily to yourself. Finally, something to get you to actually do your homework.

                                                     ~The Next Day~ You wake up to the sound of your phone alarm, playing the song “Rain” by BTS. Fitting, considering that it is raining pretty heavily outside. You have three new texts from Namjoon, as well as like fifty from your group chat with Melanie, Skylar, and Ainsley (Skylar was the only one who didn’t hook up with anyone, apparently).

Kim Namjoon: So it’s raining 8:20 Kim Namjoon: maybe we should study at the library instead? 8:20 Kim Namjoon: ur call lol 8:21 You: sure 8:46 You: i dont feel like dealing with soggy notes today lmao 8:46

After a laughing emoji from Namjoon, you get ready to go meet him.

You spot him almost immediately in the library. He’s the one person not wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt, and he waves at you when you walk in.

“Hello stranger,” you say, winking. He smiles, his eyes crinkling behind his glasses as he smiled. “Nice meeting you too, y/n,” Namjoon says, patting the seat next to him, “have a seat.”

You sit down and pull out two of your textbooks and your computer, while Namjoon clears a space on the desk for you.

“So, what exam are you studying for? I’m finishing up with my Civ Pro studying.” “I’m working on my Modern Literature essay prep,” you say, pulling up the essay document on your computer. “Ooh, I could help with that, I took Modern Literature last year.” Namjoon says, adjusting his glasses. “Okay, thank you!” You say, warmly. And so your study session begins.

The next few hours are spent not only studying, but also joking around and giggling. Studying with Namjoon was fun, but also very productive. The most productive you’ve been in months. You schedule more sessions for the next few days, and leave the library feeling very satisfied. You’re definitely cool with having a study partner.

[burnt-tomato]

Something I found in my drafts that I might finish in the future but for now I'll show what I've done

I think it was about Fem!reader x Daichi and the storyline are real or actually happened plus the part that you'd suddenly break (except the part where I'm studying in Karasuno obviously and the grade year and the relationship with Daichi lol)

This was made a year and a half ago, but I didn't bother to finish it lmao

Initial Title: "I'm always here for you, so don't hesitate to show me a side no one's ever seen of you"

This is mostly just fluff since I'm not used to angst yet lol

Theme: Fem!reader × Daichi Sawamura; s/o's father died and she tried her best to hide her emotions and remain strong, but one time breaks down and Daichi comforts his s/o

As usual, you spent the entire afternoon in your room, staring at your phone. This phone that he once held that's now yours.

Everyone saw you as this tough and independent girl. To them, you were really cool, physically and emotionally strong, talented and smart, so they expected alot from you. It has always been hard to live up to people's expectations, but you didn't mind and kept doing what you usually do. You hung out with your school's boys volleyball club, mostly with the third years, but you spent the most time with Karasuno's captain, Sawamura Daichi. Rumors has it that you two are even dating, which isn't just a rumor, but you didn't want anyone to know because they saw you as someone who wouldn't put romance on top of studying. So after their team practices, he would walk you home because of how late it is.

- _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ - _ -

Everything was way too sudden. It was the 13th of November, you woke up at a normal daw early in the morning at 5AM. You were on the first year of your high school. You get down to the living room, then greeted by your two parents that are both getting ready to leave for work. You eat breakfast with them, after they kiss you on the forehead and leave, while you go and take a bath and get ready for school. You arrive at your school, greeted by your classmates and friends, classes dragged on like forever, and your head fell face first on your desk, and before you know it you fell asleep. Your friends wake you up when classes ended, then you rush to the volleyball team's gym to meet with the club. After the club finishes practice, you get home, and unusually, some of your relatives were at your home. They all happily greeted you and led you inside, but why are they here? It's not like there's anything special that happened except tomorrow is your mother's birthday, but your relatives don't usually come at birthdays.

"Ah y/n, you should remove your uniform now, you must be exhausted! Here, I'll carry your bag inside" your cousin said.

You still didn't know what was going on. When you changed your clothes, you tried asking your older cousin why they were all here.

"Y/n! Uhh... hey you should do your homework already. Your mom told me to pack some of your outside clothes"

"But why? I mean, I know tomorrow is my mom's birthday, but why pack clothes?"

"Mmm... I'm not sure either" she smiled and chuckled a little after.

Everything seemed normal enough you guessed. Until your mother got home.

(I won't really elaborate this part, but this is when mom got home and told us what happened.)

.

.

This couldn't be real. This is way too sudden. He didn't show any signs of pain or fatigue, so how could this happen out of the blue... these thoughts flooded your head. Your entire family started to cry, except you. You sat there, frozen, trying to process what they said and tried to think the best way to react.

After the funeral, you decided to attend school already so you could catch up with what you missed. When you arrived, all of your classmates and teachers offered condolences, which honestly you didn't really want right now... Even if it's been 4 days already, you tried to act normally and didn't think much about it. This went on for 2 to 3 hours, trying really hard to keep your emotions intact and your head clear.

.

2 years later...

.

You and Daichi have been dating for 2 years since your first year of highschool. Both of you tried your best to keep your relationship a secret so that you could both have private moments together that even the team doesn't know (even if there was one time Suga almost found out), just cuddling (because both of you are too awkward to kiss, so both of you haven't had they firsts yet lmao). Both of you, due to your awkwardness, just cuddle when together, both of you are also really reliable and always there for each other. So one day you asked Daichi if he wanted to have a study date (if that's what it's called). He agreed and you both walked home together to your house. Both of you studied really hard for the upcoming exams and since both of you are smart, you'll probably be fine.

Daichi stood up and stretched his arms upwards.

"Hey y/n, I'm going to get a glass of water, do you want anything?"

"Ah, no." You answered immediately.

He bent down to wrap his arms around you and kissed you gently on your forehead, and walked out. You turned on your phone to look at the time and..

Unread Messages:

Mom: Hi y/n I might be home late again, so you and your friend can help yourself if you get hungry. Love you and goodnight. Sent 10:15 PM

Of course. They always come home late. But either way, even if they say that they'll be home late, you always stay up so that you get see them when they get home. Mom and dad...

Dad...

Dad....

Your hands trembled. You took a look at your phone and stared at it intensely, then you dropped it. You backed away slowly, keeping your eyes on your phone. Your head was filled with thoughts that you had a hard time sorting out, and you couldn't process how you should react or what your emotion should be.

I... how could I forget? Whatever I do, however times I pray or wish, whatever happens... he'll never come back. What happened has happened. It's been a year and a half, I did my best to hold myself in... i didnt even cry that much when they told me... why am I just reacting like this now??? No... y/n... hold it in... hold it in... get a hold of yourself... hold it in... hold it in... hold it i-

"Hey y/n! I'm bac-!"

Shit... it's too late... why... why of all people... why Daichi.... why now.. why infront of him...??? Shit I can't hold it in....

Before you knew it, tears were rolling down your cheeks. You tried to stop them but something kept them going.

"Y/N!! Are you okay??? What's wrong??? Y-y/n!!! How can I help???" He tried to ask you properly and tried to calm you down, but he was in a panic because it was the first time that you cried. It was unexpected of course. The y/n that was really tough, crying.

He rushed to your side and flew his arms around you and pulled your head on his chest. You kept on crying, and you couldn't stop. You've been holding it in for so long, and right now is the time when all of the pain building up has come out. He tried and tried to tell you that everything would be fine and that he was there for you. He also tried asking what was wrong, but your mind was too foggy and your throat hurts from crying so loudly.

Finally you managed to settle down and tried your best to tell him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cry so suddenly."

"Don't EVER apologize because you cried." He said.

You explained to him about your father's death and how you've been hiding your pain. You told him how you hid everything you felt to keep your reputation and to not disappoint those who looked up to you. You didn't want anyone to see this side of you.

"Y/n... why did you hide all of this? For your reputation? To not disappoint anyone? Crying is normal for everyone. Crying doesn't mean you're weak, it means you're strong. You didn't have to suffer all through this pain. You could've opened up to me!"

"B-but... don t I look pathetic this way...?"

"Y/n... any side of you I will accept. I love you the way you are. I love you whatever happens. I love you and will always love you y/n. And please remember that for the rest of our lives..."He said softly.

He looked into your eyes. You stared back at him while he wiped your tears away, and kissed your forehead.

"Sorry... I'm sorry about not telling you this..."

"Y/n... You don't have to apologize, alright? I'll always be here for you and with you. I'm always here for you, so don't hesitate to show me a side no one's seen of you."

Starting that night, you both swore to be there for each other, to love each other no matter what, to never leave each other's side. Starting that night, you never once more hesitated to tell him your problems. Even if people saw you as really strong and tough, you didn't mind being weak and vulnerable around Daichi. You were happy. He reminded you so much of your father, reliable, helpful, caring, and really loving.

"I love you too, Daichi"

Lmao what is this garbage. I feel like it's finished but it has holes in the middle so I think that's what's missing here. The story isn't well written out lol. It's just a draft that I didn't bother to come back to lol. Sorry if it's bad a a a a a a a. Also to clarify, the reason y/n backed away from her phone was because her phone now used to be her father's phone (this is true)

[lovelyirony]

Ironwidow fake dating and cousin Sharon matchmaking

Nat and Tony have been friends since seventh grade, when Tony made fun of her drawing and in retaliation, Nat stuck a pencil in his thigh. 

He grinned at her after sneakily getting a tissue from the front desk. 

“You’re pretty good, Nat.” 

“My name is Natasha.” 

“Not to me, it’s not.” 

So it becomes Nat and Tony. Tony and Nat. They do everything together, from attend the eighth grade pool parties and hate all of them to the freshman orientation in high school where they make fun of the senior leaders and sneak into the admissions office to make sure they have at least one class together. (And then change the schedule when they don’t.) 

Tony has been in love with Natasha Romanoff since the first eighth grade pool party, when she showed up in a full wet suit because she didn’t like the way that their classmate Ivan liked her. 

But, he hasn’t done anything about it. Why is that, everyone asks? Just ask her out! 

Well, Tony has a special talent that is medically known as “anxiety,” but he also has common sense. 

Natasha Romanoff is beautiful. She has gorgeous red hair, eyes that know everything about you before you even think they do, a wicked sense of humor, and a sense of self that is beyond anything Tony’s ever encountered. 

Tony stays up until three a.m., doesn’t give a shit about his appearance so he is frequently rushing to school with the worst bed hair imaginable, and also wears possibly the most out-of-style clothing ever. 

Like right now. A pair of jeans that’s too short and he cuffed only on one leg, a shirt that’s advertising some college Howard made him visit, and he’s pretty sure that the plaid he layered it with has a coffee stain down the back. 

He’s proven right when Sharon wrinkles her nose. 

“Dude, you seriously haven’t done laundry since two weeks ago, have you?” 

“Do I smell bad? Do I?” 

She leans in. 

“No, just like old coffee. So regular. We’ll see when Nat comes. Or you could confess your love to have her not roast your choice of apparel.” 

Tony scowls, adjusting his backpack. 

“Do you have another topic, or are you just that boring?” 

“I could also tell you about World War One,” Sharon adds. “I just read about it in one of those stupid textbooks I have to carry around. Did you know that the French are actually the worst at war?” 

“Yes, everyone knows that. I think they know that too.” 

Nat’s already at her locker. She looks gorgeous with her jean jacket, the new patches sewn on. 

“Looking cute,” Sharon says appreciatively. “Do you think you’re gonna get dress-coded for the ‘fuck men’ patch?” 

“Not if they want me to write an article on how the club fund got cut but the football team got another new field within four years,” Nat says. 

“Still a good article,” Tony says. “If you could still get into a college without a reputation ruined. You know how much schools care about sports.” 

“More than education at times!” Sharon cheers. 

Nat snorts, bringing Tony into a hug. 

“Nice to see you, dude. Ready for history?” 

“Not in the slightest. We’re probably talking about government procedure again while our teacher waxes poetic about the justice system. I think I might try to change the FDA’s home screen again.” 

“You know, they might catch on after the fourth time of you inserting random YouTube videos to different links.” 

“It’s the Federal Department of Agriculture, I highly doubt they care,” Tony says, rolling his eyes. “Besides, I’ve already proven that I’m probably better with technology than the government itself.” 

This was true; Tony had hacked into the official website of the White House with shitty hotel Wi-Fi and half his sanity. (It was flu season, he’d had way too much Ny-Quil.) 

School passes by with little incident, all things considered. A classic Monday, with the only real excitement being an announcement of no school the following Monday for a staff meeting. 

It isn’t until Tony gets home to find both of his parents home and in the same room, waiting for him, that he starts to panic. 

“Is this an intervention?” Tony asks. “Did I do something bad?” 

“Not yet,” Howard says. “Although I wouldn’t be surprised.” 

“Dear,” Maria reprimands. “No, there’s an event that we want you to attend.” 

“Want or need?” Tony asks. “I was supposed to hang out with my friend Bruce to work on his genetics lab.” 

“I’m sure the lab can wait,” Howard scoffs. “You’re in high school, for god’s sake.” 

“Bruce is doing lab work for Culver,” Tony says. “He got early acceptance, so he’s doing a weird deal so he gets college credit and a year off early.” 

“Impressive, dear,” mom says, smiling. “But this event is something that you can’t miss.” 

It’s a goddamn family reunion. Maria’s side, but still. At least Peggy and Sharon would come. 

Family reunions on the Carter/Carbonell side are…interesting. A lot of loud people, aunts that couldn’t stop cooking, and at least one uncle that would say something marginally horrible and cause a rift for at least six hours where everything was tense. 

Sharon had to take this advantage carefully. 

So she got her own email into the family chain of them–a mistake by all accounts, but one that should be committed sooner rather than later–and tells the family that Tony is bringing his girlfriend, Natasha. 

They both love each other, she knows that much. Tony looks at Nat like he could give her anything in the world, and Nat looks at him with so much vulnerability that she always says she doesn’t have. 

They’ve liked each other for a while now. Sharon wishes that it wasn’t at her family reunion that she was doing this, but it was either that or a dance for high school, and that’s far too much work. 

Tony, understandably, is stressed. 

“Does she even know she’s going?!” Tony yells. “Holy shit Sharon, she’s going to meet like eighty of us!” 

“Yeah,” Sharon says. “She just doesn’t know that she’s supposed to be your girlfriend.” 

“Sharon.” 

“Yes?” 

“Run.” 

Sharon squeals as she skids out of the room, Tony chasing after her. He’s not really going to do anything about it, but he still has to text Nat. 

i am. so sorry 

lmao it’s fine. sharon just said i’m going to the reunion. why? 

funny story…

fuck what’d she do 

she emailed everyone that i was bringing you as a girlfriend. and i’m not really going to spend the whole weekend correcting it. 

gotcha. operation: fake dating commence! 

thank you nat. seriously love you 

Nat reads the message, but doesn’t respond. Of course Sharon would pull something like this. She knew that Nat liked her cousin, probably since they were kids. 

And now she had to pretend to be his girlfriend, something she actually wanted very much to do. 

She gets a text from Sharon. 

Please don’t wear your jean jacket with all the patches. It’s very cool, but you will start a fight in my family and win. But then you aren’t allowed to come back :( 

Natasha sends her back the middle finger, but then promises not to bring it.

This brings up the subject; what do you wear to a family reunion? 

- 

Tony’s fidgeting in the car as he goes to pick up Nat. His mother was very surprised. 

“You got your father’s distinct habit of not shutting your mouth,” she says with a chuckle. “But I do suppose the gazes say it all. Every Carbonell man looks like he’s in love before he says it, so–” 

“Mama, not now!” Tony hisses. Natasha’s making her way to the car, backpack slung around her shoulder and an elegant handbag in the crook of her arm. 

“Hey Ms. Carbonell,” Natasha says. “How are you?” 

“Doing good, better now that I get to have you with us,” she teases. “Anthony over here never told me that he was going to have you on as a special guest.” Natasha sends a raised eyebrow over to Tony. 

“Oh?” 

“I forgot,” Tony lied smoothly. “You know how I get in the labs. Just completely forget everything I’m supposed to remember.” 

The conversation is easy after that: just a few little anecdotes that Nat and Tony have gone over last night over the phone. They had confessed that they liked each other a year ago, had kept it extremely low-key since both didn’t want to fuss with it, and that was that. 

“How come Sharon knew but I didn’t?” Mom pouts. 

“She’s an imp,” Tony answers. “An imp who doesn’t know how to keep business to herself.” 

Their family fills up a small inn out of the way, and Tony sighs as he sees three of his aunts already conspiring at the bar. 

“Be prepared for a barrage of questions.” 

“Roger that.” 

Natasha is whisked away by the ladies with a few compliments to the cute flats she’s wearing and her favorite type of perfume. Tony gets led over to Sharon, who is playing darts with Trip and their kind-of-but-not-really-cousin, Ricardo. 

“What have I missed out on?” Trip asks, grinning. “Heard some girl was crazy enough to come and date you. She’s a looker, Tony.” 

“Thanks,” Tony says. “But yes, crazy enough to date me. Sharon knows how crazy it is, I practically get the same gene from her.” 

Sharon rolls her eyes, landing another bullseye. Ricardo curses. 

“How do you always manage to do this?” 

“Practice for this exact moment,” Sharon says with a grin. “Go get me a drink. One of the good ones.” 

“You seriously get him to do your bidding every single time,” Tony says with a laugh. Trip excuses him to see Uncle Erik, leaving Sharon and Tony alone. 

“So. You liking your new status of boyfriend?” 

“You seriously need to stop meddling,” Tony scowls. “Just because I like her doesn’t mean she should be in on this.” 

“She doesn’t mind,” Sharon scoffs. “Besides, I think Aunt Angie is going to tell her about the cardboard incident.” 

“Oh my god–” 

Natasha saunters over, grinning devilishly. 

“So. Naked and a cardboard box for modesty? Why am I not surprised at the innovation, Tony?” 

“Dammit,” Tony swears. “I’m going to learn something embarrassing about you. I’ll ask Clint.” 

“Like he’ll tell.” 

The reunion goes about as well as expected. Uncle Daniel finally spills the beans and says that his son who couldn’t make it was going to bring his girlfriend that no one likes, but they canceled at the last minute. 

“They’re horrible,” Tony says. “I’m serious. They’re the kind of people that take advantage of old people.” 

“Gross.” 

They gravitate closer to each other. While Natasha doesn’t have a problem with this, it’s bittersweet. Every time Tony casually puts his arm around her and tells another story about how they snuck into the office to match schedules and his family coos and says it’s so cute, and Sharon smiles at them. 

It stings, to be this close and yet knowing that it isn’t at all real. 

Tony lies awake at night. Becuase this is nice. All of his family loves Nat, so does he, and it seems…possible almost. To have her this close, smiling at him like she has. 

So it’s not a good idea, but he goes to her room at three a.m. She’s still awake. 

“Why are you still awake?” 

“Watching funny videos. Why are you awake?” 

“That’s why I’m here. Follow me.” 

They go into the courtyard. It feels…nice outside. Tony’s wringing his hands. 

“What’s got you so nervous?” Natasha asks. “And why at three in the morning?” 

“I think this is literally the only way I could do it,” Tony says. “Only time my family shuts up.” 

“Go for it then,” Natasha says. “You have until four, when your baby cousin wakes up. Lorenzo?” 

“Got it,” Tony says, smiling. “Um, well, I–” 

“What?” 

“Oh fuck,” Tony curses. “Listen, I’m just going to say it. I’m just going to say it.” 

“You’ve said that twice.” 

“Iloveyou.” 

“What?” 

“I…I love you,” Tony says, sighing. “I’ve loved you I think since eighth grade, and I’m now telling you because I don’t think I can just go on with life without telling you. I also realize that you’re stuck at the family reunion until this is over, so now I realize I’ve put stress on you and I’m sorry, I can fake my death if you really want me to, so–” 

Natasha envelops him in a hug. She kisses his cheek, looking at him in the dim light of the lanterns. 

“You absolute fool. I love you too.” 

It’s the first of many “I love you’s.” 

Sharon takes credit for the relationship, and Tony and Nat let her. She’s also the maid of honor and meets her future wife, Maria. 

Tony and Natasha don’t go to the same college, but compete against each other in the trivia clubs that both schools have, and so they spend other time together. Natasha shows him her favorite tea shop downtown, and Tony shows her all of the hideaway spots he uses for studies. 

(And to hide her away from Rhodey, who will tell her anything and everything that’s embarrassing about Tony.) 

Right after college, Tony and Nat move into an apartment. 

About a year later, Natasha holds out a gold ring for him to put on, asks if they really have to get married in a fancy church, and watches as Tony tears up and hugs her. 

“I told you!” Sharon crows when they reveal the rings. “I told you that you would get married!” 

“Okay loser,” Natasha says. “Then you’re the maid-of-honor. Congrats on throwing my bachelorette party.” 

“I’m making us go paint-balling.” 

Tony rolls his eyes, but looks at his now-fiancee. 

Things will be good. Aren’t they always? 

[purplesurveys]

631

General Randomness What's the weather like right now? It’s very bright and sunny out, but January is typically one of the colder days of the year so I’m not feeling uncomfortable right now. It’s the perfectly chilly temperature I would have liked to have all year long. What are you currently sitting on? I am sitting on a chair at our dining table, which is usually where I take surveys. How many times have you brushed your teeth today? Just once.

When did you get up? I’ve been up since 8, but didn’t get out of bed until 10.

Have you been in a vehicle for more than 45 minutes today? I haven’t been in a car at all today cos I’ve only stayed home. Angela invited me to go out for some drinks but I didn’t feel like drinking or being out today, so I’ve been home the whole time.

Where is your best friend? I think Angela is at home but I’m sure she’s getting ready to go out for the aforementioned ^ drinking. I’m not sure where Gab is. How many days until Christmas? Oh wow, barely missed it, chief. There are 355ish days left, I’m guessing? Have you kissed someone today? Nope. Is your mom over 50? No, and she still has a year to go. How old were you 7 years ago? I was technically 14, but was about to turn 15 in a few months. Do you know what 'C'est la vie' means? Yep. In Gen Z lingo, it essentially means, ‘it be like that sometimes’ lmao. Do you usually take showers or baths? Showers, because we don’t have bathtubs and also because I find it much more efficient anyway. I only take baths when I’m out of town, in a fancy hotel, and want to pamper myself with bubbles and fancy body wash. What kind of bottoms are you wearing right now? I’m wearing shorts just meant for the home.

Are you wearing anything red? Yes, the pair of shorts I just talked about. What was the name of your first pet? I didn’t keep track of my first goldfish’s name but a good guess would be Goldie. I wasn’t a very creative kid, so I wouldn’t be surprised if that turned out to be right. Do you live in an apartment? Nope. I’ve been living with my parents under their roof. What color is the floor in the room you're in? Cream-ish. What was the most irritating thing to happen to you today? My thesis professor being a headache to talk to. I am genuinely baffled at how she was able to secure a very high position in my university’s administration, considering how erratic she can get. How do you feel about your most recent ex? She’s great. Do you wish at 11:11? No. Do you wish on shooting stars? I would, if they often visited on this side of the world. But they don’t, so. Do you wish on dandelions? No. There aren’t a lot where I live. Are you drinking anything right now? Mmm no, not at the moment. I finished my coffee a little while ago and while I want to make a second cup to keep myself awake, I have an early morning tomorrow so I’d want to sleep early tonight. It’s back to work for me, ugh. About how tall is your father? Not too tall. He’s like, 5′5 or 5′6.  How old is your oldest living grandparent? I only know the age of one grandparent, and that’s my 73 year old maternal grandmother. I don’t get to see my paternal grandparents a lot cos they live quite far, so with that comes my insufficient knowledge about them.  Do you know anyone who has lived to be 100+? Gab’s great-grandmother, but she passed away last November. Have you had your birthday yet this year? Nope. There’s been a mere three days into the year, so very few people would already have had their birthdays hahaha. Do you read your horoscope on a regular basis? No. You do you, but I was never a fan. It’s also a pet peeve when people use their star sign as excuses for their shitty behavior. “Sorry I acted up, I’m a Scorpio,” “I hate everybody because I’m an Aquarius,” “I ghosted them because I’m a Cancer” no it’s because you’re a bitch, Karen. Do you like the color yellow? I hate it a bit less than green (my least favorite color) only because I love the song Yellow by Coldplay and because mustard yellow isn’t that bad of a color. Are you an aunt or uncle? If my friends start having kids soon, then I’ll be an aunt. Why is your best friend your best friend? They both understand my weirdness and all my quirks and never made me feel like I was being judged. What is your hair like at the moment? Tbh it matches my top pretty well so as frizzy as my hair is at the moment, it still looks good with the tank top I have on lolol. How many times have you donated blood this year? Zero. I’m scared of needles, and even if I get over that phobia I wouldn’t be able to donate anyway because I’m underweight. Are you wearing any jewelry? No, not right now. Are you a video-gamer? I wouldn’t call myself that. I play GTA just to be a law-abiding citizen and not actually do the missions lol, I get tired of playing The Sims after ten minutes, and I only play a handful of Nintendo games. Who got married at the last wedding you went to? My mom’s brother and his then-fiancee, now one of my favorite aunts except for the facts that she’s a hardcore Duterte supporter and Marcos apologist. Do you like Chinese food? Yep, it’s one of my favorite cuisines. How far is the nearest Walmart? I can’t walk nor drive to it, that’s for sure. Have you ever been a designated driver? I’m always DD by default because I’m the only one among my friends who has a car other than JM, who also has a (much bigger) car but is terribly low-tolerance and will absolutely pass out. I get tipsy easily as well, but I sober up real quick and always make sure I’m 100% back to reality by the time I drive. Which means that I typically have to stop drinking earlier than the rest of my friends, but so long as that means I get to take everyone back home safe, it’s okay with me. What is something that always brings tears to your eyes? My mom yelling at me. Who is your 20th phone contact? My contacts aren’t numbered thus I’m too lazy to count manually. Do you have any plans to get a tattoo? It’s not completely off the table, but I’ve definitely toned down my original plans of getting tattoo sleeves and getting myself generally covered a la CM Punk (and I have to tell ya, I’m so glad I grew out of that phase). These days I prefer to have small tattoos to memorialize significant people or events, and some of my plans include my dog’s pawprint and a plate of nachos. Or a new piercing? Probably not. What would your name be if your last name was the color of your shirt? Brown. If you could find out how you would die, would you want to know? Yes. I hate the unknown and would rather be certain, no matter how ugly or nasty the certainty holds. Do you make your bed regularly? Every morning. Do you look forward to the weekend? NO. I have a 2-day meeting for my 2-day weekend. I am so dreading it. I just want to stay a lazy couch blob for another week. How much do you know about the mechanics of cars? I know how to turn a car on, go forward, reverse, brake, and open my gas tank... and that’s about it. Has anyone ever told you you should be a model? Model and beauty queen, yeah. How old was your mom when she had you? She was 26, but was turning 27 that year. Do rainy days get you down? No. I thrive on rainy days lmao. Who is the artist/band you're listening to at the moment? No music keeping me company at the moment. Do you ever take aspirin when you 'feel a headache coming on'? Not aspirin but I take a Biogesic. I dunno if those two or the same thing or not. Is there a calendar in the room you're in? Nope. Do you prefer to be in a relationship or be single? I’ve been seeing a person for technically six years, so now I prefer a relationship after being accustomed to having one for so long. If you're single, do you wish you were in a relationship? Have you ever had your heart broken? Sure. Do you live within an hour of the beach? No. I’m very far away from the beach :( How do you like your steak? Rare or medium-rare. Were you born in the 1980s? I was not. A Few Firsts What was the first sound you heard when you woke up? I woke up to the sound of my mom calling me on my phone. I was half-asleep and didn’t feel like answering, so I muted it and went back to sleep. I feel guilty now that I remember, but she didn’t call back or text me so it probably wasn’t a big deal. Who was your first best friend? It was a girl named Kaye from kinder. We were good friends for like two years, and then we got sorted to different sections in Prep and drifted apart after that. Who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend? I’ve said her name so many times on these surveys already. Y’all know. Who was your first date to a formal dance? I haaaateeeeed the idea of asking guys out and being in a relationship for most of high school, so I made sure I only asked my cousin for my prom. How bad was your first break up? Pretty messed up. There was a lot of tension and resentment and confusion in the beginning. Throw in my grandfather’s sudden death and me taking the UPCAT, and you have my mental health completely rattled! What was your first favorite movie? High School Musical, for sure. How old were you when you had your first kiss? 16. What was your first trip to the emergency room for? My platelet count was really low, I was in danger of getting dengue, and had to stay the night at the hospital. Then there was sticking the IV onto my wrist, upon which I made a complete scene in the emergency room and thrashed and kicked around while my (very frail) grandma (sorry, Lola) tried to hold me down with a lot of patients watching lol. Where was the first place you went today? The kitchen. Who was the first person you saw? My sister, I think. What was the first thing you thought about when you woke up? I wondered why my mom called, realized I was too sleepy to care, and went back to bed. Do you remember the first time you spent the night away from home? Yupppp. I was in third grade, my club had an overnight camping thingy as its culmination activity, and it was the first time ever that I was allowed to spend the night somewhere else. I remember being around a campfire, roasting marshmallows for the first time, having to share a sleeping mat with Katreen, and her kicking me in her sleep.

Where was your first big vacation to? Boracay. What was your first job? None yet. I’ll make sure to update you by the end of the year. What was the first thing you had to drink today? Coffee.

Some Lasts Where was the location of your last kiss? My girlfriend’s car, when she dropped me back at my place. How old was the last person you kissed? 21. What was the last movie you rented? I’ve never experienced renting a movie, which definitely confirms my status as a Gen Z kid lmao. But I can tell you that the last movie I watched was Knives Out. Where was the last place you went? Other than around my house, we went to church last Tuesday night for New Year’s Eve mass. What was the last restaurant you went to? Yabu. Who was the last person to call you? My mom, this morning. Who was the last non-relative you spoke in person to? Gabie. What was the last thing you bought? I got dinner from Yabu, haha. When was the last time you drove more than an hour somewhere? December 14th. That evening was INSANE. It was Saturday + Christmas traffic, and it took me two hours to travel from Antipolo to Rita’s place in Makati. JM and I drove separately cos we were a big group - his drive took FOUR hours. Why did you last get angry? My thesis prof was doing us so fucking dirty and I couldn’t do anything about it. What color was the last vehicle you rode in? Blue-green. How long ago was your last birthday? NIne months. When did it last rain? It drizzled a little bit yesterday. What was the age difference between you and your most recent ex? A month and a half. When was the last time you used a dictionary? Maybe an hour ago for a word I used in a past survey lol. Mini iPod Shuffle: Don't Cheat, Use Whatever Song Comes Up, No Matter How Ridiculous (I have several playlists, so I’ll just use the Spotify-curated playlist made for Gab’s account called Your Top Songs 2019 hahahaha) My love song: Love song - Lana Del Rey (Wow.) My fight song: Swim Against the Tide - The Japanese House My break-up song: New Light - John Mayer The song for when I'm sad: Money - Leikeli47 The song for when I'm angry: Constant Conversations - Passion Pit My song to have sex to: Bad Girls - Tennis The song about my ex: Just the Same But Brand New - St. Vincent The song about my best friend: Juice - LIZZO The song about my crush: Seventeen - no rome My 'feel good' song: Venice Bitch - Lana Del Rey The theme song of my life: Formation - Beyoncé I literally know four of these songs, which I’ve since bolded just so y’all know that I have no idea what the other seven songs are and if they make sense with the situations at hand. Gab clearly uses her account more than I do, which should be the case anyway lmfaoooooo.

[agirlinhell]

my blog: [reaches 100+ followers]

my eyes: ey yo look like i’m goin for a swim

HOLY SHIT IT’S BEEN A BIT OVER A YEAR AND Y’ALL ARE STILL HERE?? jfc I LOVE YOU GUYS. in all seriousness, though, i met just the greatest people ever while i’ve been here and uuuuuuuugh, I LOVE interacting with each and every one of you, i love seeing you guys on my dash and I JUST AGLGGALJGAGALJGAGLAJ so thank you all so much for sticking with me through this. i probably don’t deserve it and you’re all here anyway<333

before we get real deep into this: thank you. whoever you are, if you’re reading this, i’m thanking you. for being here, for following this trash ass blog and loving this muse as much as i do. also i’m thanking you for waking up today, for drinking water and eating your food, for doing your chores, for taking a shower, brushing your teeth, for taking a nap, for getting through yet ANOTHER DAY OF THIS BITCH OF A PLANET. and even if you did none of those things — thank you. stay with us. this world needs you. all of us are unique. there’s no one like you, 

thank you for existing - i love you.

NOW LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS TO DEFEAT THE HUNS

i hope you’re all ready bitches bc IMMA SHOWER Y’ALL WITH LOVE:

@keptmanners​ / @morefinesse​ / @worldendured​ : I’VE SAID THIS SO MANY TIMES BUT UUUUUUUUUGH, this person right here, ande, is one of the people responsible for this blog being what it is today. no joke. when i was at my worst (activity wise) ande was always here, replying to our shit, plotting and discussing concepts and screaming about our muses and just being nice and kind and understanding to me whenever we talked. the relationship we built between clem and ruby/louis/your muses was one of the things that kept me from leaving this blog altogether, so thank you so much - i honestly really appreciate and admire you.

@taggedbastard​ / @paulklee-guild​: listen to me YOU LITTLE SHIT AKJAJGAGLJGA no jk, i love you so much and that’s so crazy because we haven’t even been talking for that long - we deadass started talking like two-three days ago? like, we fell in love with each other bc we’re cancerians and with the OTP in like 0.2 seconds and it was beautiful??? UGH I LOVE YOU BITCH AND I AIN’T NEVER GONNA STOP LOVING YOU BITCH.

@prctecthem​ : TSUKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!! i got you, okay? but seriously, thank you for becoming such a good friend and great person to talk to these last few weeks. i am so glad to have met you <3 AND I LOVE OUR THREADS WHAT THE FUCK?? like we should have hundreds of them, honestly. no jk <3 bUT MAYBE???

@weprevail​ : BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY !!!!!! I LOVE HOPE SO MUCH??? A VALID LEGEND IN THE RPC!! SHE SPOILS ME WITH LEE, DUCK, MITCHENTNE AND VIOLETINE CONTENT AND I CR Y!!! i love when we talk about stuff!! you can do it, you can accomplish your dreams, i believe in you - i’ve got your back okay??<33

@rcdhccdie​ : IRL BESTIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I’M SO HAPPY YOU’RE GRADUATING AND THAT YOU’RE ABLE TO KICK SCHOOL RIGHT IN THE ASS!! ILY ILY ILY ILY - I’LL SEE YOU SOON, OKAY??<333

the bad bitch brigade:

@dcadrct​, @stillgcod​ & @mortuism​: MY HOMIESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. no seriously like, artie, merc and jude are the some of the bestest friends on tumblr/discord that i could have ever asked for and i can’t imagine my life without them anymore. i mean, lmao, i have more verses with them combined than anyone else in the world, artie and merc are just ALWAYS THERE WHEN I WANT TO TALK TO THEM AND I JUST !!!! <#3333 AND JUDE IS DOING HIS BEST AND I LOVE AND SUPPORT A LEGEND!! artie destroys my ass with marlontine / clouis angst/fluff, merc has me crying up in the club about sophietine and jaiko and jude makes me cry like a little bitch with his lee, carl, violet, brody and lilly content  i am truly honored and glad to share this muse with such wonderful people ( or at least formerly in merc’s case ALGJGAAGLAGALJ ) and to just be your friend???? y’all have always been there to call me out on my shit if i ever fuck up and i get my shit together accordingly so i really appreciate it - y’all are also some HILARIOUS ASF PEOPLE

the gay juicebox squad

(or people i love interacting with and want to interact with/talk to even MORE &&& people that i JUST started interacting with and WANT TO KEEP GOING BC YOU’RE PERFECTION – &&&&&&& PEOPLE I HAVE PLOTTED WITH BUT I STILL OWE A STARTER / REPLY TO BC I SUCK, BUT I’M EXCITED TO RP WITH AAAAAAAA ):

@twdgdeadmanwalking, @rcdhccdie @creolejesus, @corpsepaintd, @zombeam, @pyrrhaeic, @weprevail , @crackinthewhip, @youngshct @we-are-strcng @livesrot @reekcd @corpsepaintd​ @forgedvalor @goldenngore @emsorcism @thecomplication @sympaheart @almostskylight @agirlofwinterfell​

the SENPAIS

(bc i stalk you from far, far away and we either don’t talk much/at all and never interacted and i want that to change but i’m too intimidated by your everyday PERFECTION AND FLAWLESSNESS ON MY DASH):

@killthebxy​ @sevenbled​ @plannedahead​ @zaldrczes​ @highhking​ @creaturologist​ @dracharenae​

IF I FORGOT ANYONE: i am sorry. i occasionally suck. plus, it’s deadass late. but i suck. yeah. love y’all <3

now let’s do the giveaway thing!!!

MY APPRECIATION FOR THE GOOD, ACTIVE (some inactive bc i’m trash) & TALENTED PEOPLE THAT I FOLLOW & THAT FOLLOW ME, CATEGORIZED.

THE WALKING DEAD

@twdgdeadmanwalking​, @crackinthewhip​, @keptmanners​ @prctecthem​ @morefinesse​ @stillgcod​ @dcadrct​ @victuus​ @weprevail​ @mortuism​ @shitbircl​ @ofstonerisms​ @worldendured​  @childtroubled​ AND SO MANY MORE

A SONG OF ICE AND FIRE/GAME OF THRONES

@killthebxy, @longmayshereignxcersei @reekcd, @zaldrczes, @dracharenae @goldenngore @mcsttrusted @bcarexiled​ AND SO MANY MORE

HARRY POTTER

@creaturologist​

                      NARUTO

@bitiing​ @cursemcrked​

GANGSTA.

@taggedbastard​ @paulklee-guild​ @forgedvalor​

FANDOMLESS & MUMU & OTHER FANDOMS & FANDOMS I’M NOT TOO FAMILIAR WITH

@emsorcism @ncvabcrn @illicios @corpsepaintd @creolejesus @xendure @sevenbled @bonezone @bloominghands​ AND SO MANY MORE

;& PERSONALS

YOU’RE LIKE THE BEST? i have no idea why so many of you follow me, but i’m super happy to know that you like this blog for some reason. thank you for being here with me. you ROCK!!! ALL OF YOU!!! 

a few honorable mentions: @aesthetic-survivor-of-twd​ @thewalkingclementine​ @rascet​ and @twdgjames​!!<3

____________________________________________________________________________________________

As for the giveaway, I offer the following prizes: one drabble, one edit/promo, five to ten icons, or an aesthetic / moodboard - the choice is entirely yours.

-None of the art unless otherwise stated that will be used in aesthetics and edits are mine.

-I will mostly be doing individuals for aesthetics/drabbles/promo’s/icons, but if you want me to have it ship related, and if i can find the right pictures for aesthetics and icons, this will be done, too.

-If a winner desires a drabble for a prize, I will write any genre you want me to, but you must tell me what exactly you want. The genre, the characters, the settings, the events, canon or alternate universe, what happens in a plot ( if there is any ), whether or not there’s a ship. Lengths and verses may vary. Oneshot, only, no multichapters.

-For aesthetics, the programs I use are ipiccy because unfortunately I don’t have nor use photoshop at the moment. You must tell me exactly what you want.

-My drabbles / aesthetics / icons DO NOT HAVE TO BE THE WALKING DEAD RELATED. I’m perfectly happy with doing prizes in relation to our muses and in other fandoms / alternate universes / crossovers.

-I can show you previews of icons, drabbles, aesthetics and edits while I am doing them, but once I am done with the results, I will not be doing a second version or an update.

-THERE WILL BE FOUR WINNERS.

-We MUST be mutuals - meaning you must be following me in order to have a chance to win.

-Feel free to like and reblog this as many times as you want - it increases your chances.

-However, I must warn you that, due to time restrictions on my part, your prizes might possibly come in a bit slower, I apologize, but it’s the constraints that bind me to this.

-The winners have until tonight at 8:00PM EST, approximately TWELVE HOURS FROM NOW, to be exact, due to time constraints on my part, to contact me. If you do not contact me after tonight is over, you will not earn your prize and it will be given to someone else at random, just as it is with the chosen winners.

[fanciful-follies]

hi! i start college in the autumn after taking a gap year, do you have any advice for freshmen? i'm scared i'll be One Of Those People who screws up their first semester or whatever

Hello! :) I do have advice! Read below the cut.

The first thing I’ll say is let yourself be nervous. Let yourself be scared. I can guarantee that at least 90% of incoming freshmen are scared. Heck, I got nervous every year of college when I moved back. It’s normal. And it’s a lot easier to just let yourself be nervous than trying to fight it or getting upset that you’re nervous in the first place. 

I’m assuming that you have some kind of orientation before classes start, and with that, try and meet as many people as you can. It can be really overwhelming, but just do your best. Orientation leaders should put you into groups of people anyway, so that makes it a little easier. But at the same time, if you don’t click with people right away, don’t sweat it. The friend group I thought I found during orientation week lasted about half of the semester before I found myself with a completely different but solid group of friends. 

I’ll also suggest looking into various clubs/associations on campus that you can join. Go to as many first meetings as you feel comfortable going to. You’ll meet a lot of different people that way and possibly find a club that is perfect for you. Clubs can be a place/group of people that end up being an awesome support system to fall back on/give some order to your time at college.

I’m also assuming you’ll have a roommate that you’ve never met before. Now, I got extremely lucky in that area. My roommate from freshman year became my best friend and I’ve roomed with her for four years now. I hope that happens for you, and it can happen, but it also might not happen. For the most part, people get along with their freshman year roommates, but they aren’t best friends, or really even friends. But what’s most important is that you all live well together. This means that you feel comfortable in the room with them, and that you respect each other’s boundaries. If things aren’t going well, there is always the option to switch rooms, and there should be upper-classmen in your dorm (RA’s) whose job it is to help you with that. 

In terms of classes, don’t do 8ams. Just don’t do it. I don’t care if you’re a morning person, don’t do it lol. If you’re a morning person, schedule a 9am or a 10am and you can still wake up early but take time getting ready and eating breakfast, maybe even get some work done if you want to. I can promise you that you will have nights where you don’t get to sleep until late, and waking up early will feel like death. 

I don’t know if you already know what you want to major in, but even if you do, I still suggest taking classes in a variety of disciplines. I was dead set on just doing English, but then my freshman year I took a sociology class and a history class, both areas which ended up being my minors. So go ahead and take a class you know nothing about. If you don’t like it within the first few weeks, you can drop it!

While I don’t necessarily think the topics taught in most college classes are more difficult than high school, the workload and the structure is very different, and it’ll take some getting used to. What I’ve noticed most is that things are pretty chill the first few weeks of classes, and then, all of a sudden, midterms and papers just start piling up. So look ahead in the syllabus, plan accordingly, and stay organized. 

Skipping classes is tempting. I’ve skipped classes. I will continue to skip classes. I am all for skipping classes when you need a mental break. BUT try to keep it to a limit.

I also really recommend going to office hours. I don’t know if you’re going to a big college or a smaller one (I got to a small one myself) but getting to know my professors outside of class has been really helpful. I had a big personal upheaval occur like…the third week of my freshman year lmao and I had to go to each professor and talk to them about it cause the incident made me have to go home every weekend for a bit and I was worried about falling behind on work, and each and every professor was so nice and understanding, and one of them go me into contact with counselors on campus and all these other resources I could use. So yeah. Get to know your professors. You’ll feel more comfortable with them, and they’ll see that you’re invested in their classes.

If/When you go to parties, go with a group. It’s more fun that way, and you’ll have people looking out for you. If you have yet to drink, go slow if/when you do for the first time. Again, have people looking out for you. And drink water after lol. Lots of water. Your future self will thank you. If you don’t like to drink, that’s fine, too. You will meet other people who don’t like to drink. There are so many things to do on campus, so don’t worry about that.

That’s all of the advice I can think of for the moment, but if you have other questions, don’t hesitate to ask!!!! :) I hope this helped!