#nothing makes me hate my country more than independence day

[autistichalsin]

"What is it like to be so uncaring? I wish I could spend a day being as unempathetic as them. (Unspoken: What's the point of having empathy anymore?")

This is a sentiment that I've seen so many others express, and myself have kinda had to work through too, in the past 24 hours.

And it's a damn good question, isn't it? The people who care for no one but themselves- and worse, who actively want to hurt others not like them- won. They got everything they wanted. Meanwhile, good, kind people lost, and are now being mocked. "Triggered, liberals?"

So what's the point, then? Why should we care anymore?

It's one of those questions where you really have to be your own guide with that. We live in a world that punishes kindness and tries its best to beat it out of people, and sometimes it's tiring to do so.

But I answered that question myself and maybe my answer will help some of you.

In a world like ours, kindness is an act of defiance. Becoming cruel/callous/selfish feeds in to the reality they peddled to steal American democracy for good. By being kind, you remind them that not everyone is like them. And believe me, under their taunting, under their cries of "own the libs", this unsettles them. Kindness is an act of resistance. Love is an act of resistance. You are telling them that they will never change who you fundamentally are, they won't take away the things that make you better than them. And there is nothing evil people hate more than reminders that not everyone is evil!!! Do you remember that scene from The Dark Knight where the Joker had a group of prisoners and ordinary citizens on two ferries with bombs to blow up the other's ship, expecting them to hit the button- but no one did, because they wouldn't take the others' lives? And how utterly baffled he was? Your continued compassion enrages fascists.

You are gaining so much more from remaining kind and empathetic than you can understand. Yes, the ones who lack it won and will get to abuse people, but they lack human connection, and most of theirs are shallow. Alpha male types don't enjoy close friendships; Matt Walsh himself said he never had a friend say he loved him, Tucker Carlson's mom hated him so much that she left him $1 in her will, and Donald Trump's wives only ever married him for his power and status. The few connections they have lack depth and care and genuineness. Sure, they have families, sometimes, who love/care for them. But it is a very different kind of love because it is conditional. That's the only kind of love they know. "Be like me, espouse my values, and then I will love you." They disown their queer children, they fear their wives being independent or their husbands being 'soft.' The instant they become "wrong" in some way, they'll be discarded. You, in seeking relationships with people who genuinely love you for you- and offering that in turn- are never going to know that terror.

You deserve to be loved. You deserve to get to continue to feel the full range of human emotion, which does and should include compassion and empathy and love. You don't deserve to have to give that up just to survive this dystopian hellscape. You deserve better and if this country has failed too much to give you better, you should still at least hold on to what scraps of better you can find.

Things are about to get worse in nearly every aspect; financially, socially, geopolitically, I could go on. Staying your authentic self- loving and compassionate- is one of the only ways you are going to be able to survive what's coming, because you'll need support, and so will those around you.

Not going to numb to what's happening is the literal only way we can fix this. And I'm going to be blunt here, no fix is coming in our lifetimes. We're going to try and salvage something in the future we aren't ever going to see here. But that makes retaining your fundamental kindness even more important, because when there's nothing in it for you, the only way to keep going is to retain a love of humanity, no matter what flaws it has, because otherwise you'll get discouraged and give up. We won't get out of this, even in a few generations, without radical acts of altruism for people who are going to live here after us. They deserve your help even if they're not here yet. They NEED you.

Don't let this change who you are. Who you are is good. Who you are is perfect. You're a normal person in an utterly insane world, and this insane world won't become sane again without people like you.

[paskapoika]

.

[itneverendshere]

thinking of how rafe wouldn’t want you to work while pregnant

that man would be so stressed, since day one!! and bartender!reader would noooot give him a break, still covering bartending shifts even tho she was the manager bc she simply enjoyed doing it every once in a while. and he's like ?????? will you sit your ass down PLEASE. but you're not listening, if there's ONE thing the pregnancy hormones gave you was extra attitude. somethin' along these lines:

rafe could feel his jaw clenching as he watched you across the room, rolling your eyes for the third time in the past five minutes. you were doing it on purpose now, deliberately ignoring him while standing behind the bar, mixing drinks like you weren’t six months pregnant.

the bartender had called in sick, and you, the manager, jumped in and covered for him. rafe crossed his arms, leaning against the counter, and tried not to look too annoyed, but fuck if it wasn’t hard.

you still had that spark in you, that independence that drew him in from the start, but now? now it just made him worry.

worry like he never thought he could.

“you’re really gonna give me a heart attack, y’know that?” he called out, his voice carrying over the chatter around the country club.

most people were too busy with their drinks and golf gossip to notice you two bickering, but anyone paying attention could see that familiar dynamic. you doing whatever you damn well pleased, him trying to keep his cool, which he never really could when it came to you putting yourself at risk.

you glanced at him over your shoulder, hands moving like second nature as you garnished a drink. “’m fine, baby” you told him, voice just as breezy as ever, like the huge bump pressing against your shirt was nothing more than an accessory. “it’s just a couple hours.”

there was that old habit of yours—acting like everything was fine when you clearly weren’t. or maybe you were, but that wasn’t the point.

the point was, you shouldn’t have to be there.

“you say that, but i know you’re gonna be hurting later,” he muttered, pushing off the counter and walking around to your side of the bar.

his hand landed gently on your waist, thumb brushing the small of your back like he always did when he wanted to get you to stop for just a second.

“c’mon, baby. just take a break, you don’t need to be on your feet like this.”

it wasn’t that you didn’t want help—you’d worked through that over the past couple years—but that stubborn streak was still there.

“’m not some porcelain doll,” you reminded him, rolling your eyes again, “’m not gonna drop dead because i’m pregnant.”

he felt his stomach drop when those words left your mouth. "jesus christ, woman," he muttered, his eyes widening in exasperation. "don’t say that shit.”

“alright, my bad,” you gave in, “didn’t mean it like that.”

rafe sighed, his hand still resting on you. he hated when you talked like that, like you had to remind him how capable you were. of course he knew. 

"promise me you're taking a leave starting tomorrow," he practically begged you despite attempting to sound firm, but that undertone of worry had been his constant companion ever since you'd found out you were pregnant. 

"next week," you sang back, not even looking up from the drink you were finishing. 

you were still in work mode, determined to keep things running smoothly despite the fact you should’ve been at home, resting.

"tomorrow," he insisted, leaning in closer, his voice softening but no less serious.

you turned to face him, eyes narrowing. "next week, or you’re not getting sex for the next three months. now get outta my bar.”

rafe blinked, his jaw going slack as he stared at you, completely blindsided. 

“what—"

“go on,” you gestured toward the other side of the counter with a flick of your hand, “out.”

his mouth opened and closed a couple of times, like a fish. he was processing, but slowly.

"but… baby," he whined, his voice dipping into a tone that could only be described as kicked puppy. “just—wanna make sure you’re okay. that you’re safe, and you’re not overdoing it. you can’t kick me out, i need to be around you.”

you gave him that look, the one that told him he was pushing his luck. "rafe, i swear to god—”

he let out a long, dramatic sigh, but started to back off, lifting his hands in surrender.

"alright, alright, ‘m going," he grunted, dragging his feet toward the exit like a kid being told to go to bed. but before he did go, he turned back one more time, his eyes pleading. "i’ll be outside if you need me."

"of course you will," you muttered, shaking your head with a half-smile. you knew he wasn’t going far, probably just far enough to hover and peek through the windows, pretending to give you space but unable to help himself.

"i love you, stop spiraling," you called out after him.

he paused, turning back to look at you, his expression softening.  

“love you too.”

[3liza]

I feel very defensive about the "goth is bougie" shit because it is historically incorrect, yes, but also and more personally, because it just erases the generations of goth kids who grew up in trailer parks and project housing or just straight up homeless, helping each other out.

it's specifically such a supportive subculture for poor and neglected kids and I really fucking hate that this has been revised and erased. juggalos and goths are very culturally close and many subcultural people are both, and juggalos have the same (and, I would argue, even better defined) culture of collective support. the Skids in Letterkenny are not made up for the show, that's just a real type of rural subcultural person. this has also been forgotten in the interim but in the 90s and 00s we didn't even really refer to OURSELVES as "goths" very much except in a joking way. goths had regional endonyms (like "skids" or "trenchies") even if they could all go to a convention or a club in a city and in that context be all called "goths" together, once they went back home they would go back to being whatever the locals called them or whatever they called themselves. this is a whole linguistics and sociology subtopic that's out of scope for a Tumblr post but is sort of related.

my point is that people who wore actual rags, and sharpie instead of nail polish, and wet n wild eyeliner instead of black lipstick, and dyed their hair with markers or food coloring or kool-aid, were and are the core of the goth scene. the majority of the pictures the mallgoth blogs are posting are from catalogs, fashion shows, costume events, yearly balls and fetes like Wave Gothik Treffen, and other places where people save up literally all year, or many years in a row, to put together ONE outfit. and there's nothing wrong with that, personally I'm proud and pleased that our hard work is being recognized and preserved. but just like formal studio photographs from the Victorian era, it is not representative of the daily or even weekly (for clubs) reality of people in the scene, some of whom were completely out of goth clothing during the day or week just to fit in at work or sometimes just to get along without being bothered at home by family members who thought the Cure was Satanic.

the people who RUN the scenes, the promoters and DJs and gogo dancers and independent designers and people who run the mailing lists and websites, the people who organize the room parties at conventions, and yes even most of the original Burning Man camps like Thunderdome, they mostly live in poverty. especially if they're young. when people organize club nights and shows, they're lucky if they break even. I wasn't aware of any of this until I started working at DNA Lounge in San Francisco, which hosts one of the oldest goth nights in the country, Death Guild. I got to know the owner of DNA well enough to find out about the financial reality of the entire scene, even the people who own the means of production and the actual property in this case, and it's not lucrative. I mean, it sometimes is, if you're running a bar for normal people and have investment captain etc, but the majority of legit subculture economics is just barely breaking even. every single event is 90% volunteer labor.

the issue of labor is maybe the confusing thing for the zoomers who are confused. goth outfits take actual physical work. maybe the Aspirational Spectacle of Labor that makes up most of TikTok has made it appear unreal to the audience rather than something you can just sit down and do?

it takes forty seconds to make the fishnet tights into a shirt. you don't need instructions, you really can just look at it and figure it out. then you think, hm, if I can make fishnets into a shirt I wonder what other things I can turn into something else. your brain will amaze you. my mom would save her tights from her formal work outfits for me when they got holes or whatever and I would just go crazy with scissors and safety pins. lots of young designers are getting attention for this layered, tights-n-pins look at the moment and it really is a fantastic aesthetic but I wonder if people think there's something special about the people who make these clothes? there isn't. you can just do it at home while you watch trashy youtubes.

one time, around 2008 or so, @gothiccharmschool and I were at the photoshoot for tabletop RPG Unhallowed Metropolis. we were there with a bunch of local goths to all make the pictures for this book together. we had all brought tons of our costumes from home to cobble together outfits for the book illustrations, and there was a moment when I just handed Jilli a pile of black skirts and some pins and said hey Jilli, could you please make me up a bustle skirt for this model real quick while I shoot these other models? and of course she did, and they were beautiful, because she knows exactly what she's doing, and because that's all a bustle is: it's a way of bunching up a skirt with another skirt. you can do it at home. you don't need instructions or to hire a seamstress or watch a video. you can just look at something and say hm does it look like a bustle? let's drape it and play with it and pin whatever works. and then you wear it for the photoshoot, or to the club!!! and then next week you pin it a different way and it's a cape instead and you wear it again!!!!!!!

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Steve Brodner

* * * *

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

July 24, 2024

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

JUL 25, 2024

Tonight, President Joe Biden explained to the American people why he decided to refuse the 2024 Democratic presidential nomination and hand the torch to Vice President Kamala Harris. 

Speaking from the Oval Office from his seat behind the Resolute Desk, a gift from Queen Victoria to President Rutherford B. Hayes in 1880, Biden recalled the nation’s history. He invoked Thomas Jefferson, who wrote the Declaration of Independence; George Washington, who “showed us presidents are not kings”; Abraham Lincoln, who “implored us to reject malice”; and Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who “inspired us to reject fear.”

And then he turned to himself. “I revere this office, but I love my country more,” he said. “It’s been the honor of my life to serve as your president.” But, he said, the defense of democracy is more important than any title, and democracy is “larger than any one of us.” We must unite to protect it. 

“In recent weeks, it has become clear to me that I need to unite my party in this critical endeavor,” he said. “I believe my record as president, my leadership in the world, my vision for America’s future, all merited a second term. But nothing, nothing can come in the way of saving our democracy. That includes personal ambition. So I’ve decided the best way forward is to pass the torch to a new generation. It’s the best way to unite our nation.”

There is “a time and a place for long years of experience in public life,” Biden said. “There’s also a time and a place for new voices, fresh voices, yes, younger voices. And that time and place is now.”

Biden reminded listeners that he is not leaving the presidency and will be continuing to use its power for the American people. In outlining what that means, he summed up his presidency. 

For the next six months, he said, he will “continue to lower costs for hard-working families [and] grow our economy. I will keep defending our personal freedoms and civil rights, from the right to vote to the right to choose. I will keep calling out hate and extremism, making it clear there is…no place in America for political violence or any violence ever, period. I’m going to keep speaking out to protect our kids from gun violence [and] our planet from [the] climate crisis.”

Biden reiterated his support for his Cancer Moonshot to end cancer—a personal cause for him since the 2015 death of his son Beau from brain cancer—and says he will fight for it, (although House Republicans have recently slashed funding for the program). He said he will call for reforming the Supreme Court “because this is critical to our democracy.”

He promised to continue “working to ensure America remains strong, secure and the leader of the free world,” and pointed out that he is “the first president of this century to report to the American people that the United States is not at war anywhere in the world.” He promised to continue rallying a coalition of nations to stop Putin’s attempt to take over Ukraine, and vowed to continue to build the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO). He reminded listeners that when he took office, the conventional wisdom was that China would inevitably surpass the United States, but that is no longer the case, and he said he would continue to strengthen allies and partners in the Pacific. 

Biden promised to continue to work to “end the war in Gaza, bring home all the hostages and bring peace and security to the Middle East and end this war,” as well as “to bring home Americans being unjustly detained all around the world.”

The president reminded people how far the nation has come since he took office on January 20, 2021, a day when, although he didn’t mention it tonight, he went directly to work after taking the oath of office. “On that day,” he recalled, “we…stood in a winter of peril and winter of possibilities.” The United States was “in the grip of the worst pandemic in the century, the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression, the worst attack on our democracy since the Civil War.” But, Biden said, “We came together as Americans. We got through it. We emerged stronger, more prosperous and more secure.”

“Today we have the strongest economy in the world, creating nearly 16 million new jobs—a record. Wages are up, inflation continues to come down, the racial wealth gap is the lowest it’s been in 20 years. We are literally rebuilding our entire nation—urban, suburban and rural and tribal communities. Manufacturing has come back to America. We are leading the world again in chips and science and innovation. We finally beat Big Pharma after all these years to lower the cost of prescription drugs for seniors…. More people have health care today in America than ever before.” Biden noted that he signed the PACT Act to help millions of veterans and their families who were exposed to toxic materials, as well as the “most significant climate law…in the history of the world” and “the first major gun safety law in 30 years.”

The “violent crime rate is at a 50-year low,” he said, and “[b]order crossings are lower today than when the previous administration left office. I’ve kept my commitment to appoint the first Black woman to the Supreme Court of the United States of America. I also kept my commitment to have an administration that looks like America and [to] be a president for all Americans.”

Then Biden turned from his own record to the larger meaning of America.

“I ran for president four years ago because I believed…that the soul of America was at stake,” he said. “America is an idea. An idea stronger than any army, bigger than any ocean, more powerful than any dictator or tyrant. It’s the most powerful idea in the history of the world.” 

“We hold these truths to be self-evident,” he said. “We are all created equal, endowed by our creator with certain inalienable rights: life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness. We’ve never fully lived up to…this sacred idea—but we’ve never walked away from it either. And I do not believe the American people will walk away from it now.

“In just a few months, the American people will choose the course of America’s future. I made my choice…. “[O]ur great vice president, Kamala Harris… is experienced, she is tough, she is capable. She’s been an incredible partner to me and a leader for our country.

“Now the choice is up to you, the American people. When you make that choice, remember the words of Benjamin Franklin hanging on my wall here in the Oval Office, alongside the busts of Dr. [Martin Luther] King and Rosa Parks and Cesar Chavez. When Ben Franklin was asked, as he emerged from the [constitutional] convention…, whether the founders [had] given America a monarchy or a republic, Franklin’s response was: ���A republic, if you can keep it.’... Whether we keep our republic is now in your hands.” 

“My fellow Americans, it’s been the privilege of my life to serve this nation for over 50 years,” President Biden told the American people. “Nowhere else on Earth could a kid with a stutter from modest beginnings in Scranton, Pennsylvania, and in Claymont, Delaware, one day sit behind the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office as the president of the United States, but here I am.

“That’s what’s so special about America. We are a nation of promise and possibilities. Of dreamers and doers. Of ordinary Americans doing extraordinary things. I’ve given my heart and my soul to our nation, like so many others. And I’ve been blessed a million times in return with the love and support of the American people. I hope you have some idea how grateful I am to all of you.

The great thing about America is, here kings and dictators do not rule—the people do. History is in your hands. The power’s in your hands. The idea of America lies in your hands. You just have to keep faith—keep the faith—and remember who we are. We are the United States of America, and there is simply nothing, nothing beyond our capacity when we do it together. So let’s act together, [and] preserve our democracy. God bless you all and may God protect our troops. 

“Thank you.”

And with that, President Joe Biden followed the example of the nation’s first president, George Washington, who declined to run for a third term to demonstrate that the United States of America would not have a king, and of its second president, John Adams, who handed the power of the presidency over to his rival Thomas Jefferson and thus established the nation’s tradition of the peaceful transition of power. Like them, Biden gave up the pursuit of power for himself in order to demonstrate the importance of democracy. 

After the speech, the White House served ice cream to the Bidens and hundreds of White House staffers in the Rose Garden.

And when the evening was over, First Lady Dr. Jill Biden posted an image of a handwritten note on social media. It read: “To those who never wavered, to those who refused to doubt, to those who always believed, my heart is full of gratitude. Thank you for the trust you put in Joe—now it’s time to put that trust in Kamala.” 

—

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

[honeymochibubbletea]

So… long time we don’t see each other here, huh…?

Warnings: i am going to talk about some topics about suicidal thoughts and… a little bit of self loathing because sadly i am built like that…

First of all, i wanted to thank my most loyal and supportive friends:

@salmonlover955 , @malin5520 , @cabasasa , @cherry-bombs-thingss , @dreamcloud12/@dreamdoll-12 and @terroristis3638…

For… you know… worrying about me and… checking up on me…

I would also like to apologize for making you guys worry about me so much… sometimes i… feel like i don’t deserve any of this kind of… attention…

But nonetheless… I am grateful for that… so… thank y’all, you guys are the best and i know one day (if you aren’t already being recognized) you all will be just like our idols: Jencil and Fluffpillow… talented and amazingly awesome…

With that out of my chest… let’s… talk about… the not so great stuff…

You know? It… was very, very… hard for me to come here and… explain the stuff that is happening on my life…

One because i… felt like if i did… i would be bothering you all with… unnecessary drama that you all clearly are going through worse than me…

And, btw, i may not have said a single reassuring word to any of you when you guys vented… (and i am deeply sorry for that…) but just know that… i am always praying for you all and… sending my best vibes and encouraging energy to all of you… (even though i am not in the best moment of my life mentally myself, haha…)

And two… well, here goes nothing, i guess:

I am currently 21 (still living with my parents, but that’s really not THE problem… the problem is… i just sometimes feel like… a useless lazy ass… that i am an adult (even though i am still trying to process this… let me ya: it’s hard…) and… “technically”… i would be considered a loser because of that… that i am not trying “hard” enough to be truly a “true mature” adult… you guys… get… the idea…) 12 of July of this year i turned 21… (i wanted to make a special headcanon/Fanfic for you all regarding my birthday… but oh well, surprise, surprise… i was too… “lazy” to do it… like i always am…), i have a brother who has Down syndrome (who i worry so much and care about his future… like… simple things like: having a wife (not husband because he only likes women), having independence, having… you know… a life of his own… and… sadly… he’s 6 years older than me and… doesn’t have any of that yet…), i (thankfully) have a “dream job”… like… where i work on they are very inclusive and friendly with me… (but sometimes my traumatized and paranoid self thinks everyone on my workplace are only “nice” to me because i am autistic and secretly, they all hate me… i am not saying that’s the case for everybody… but… I just can’t help myself…) but… they are also very, VERY strict and demand PERFECTION…

I work on a restaurant in Brazil… they are getting very popular around the whole country and… they… sometimes… forget that I am autistic and expect me to act like I am not…

Now, now, I definitely wish them all the prosperity and good luck in the world and I am DEFINITELY not trying to paint them as the “villains” and playing the victim here… (this part i am trying to convince myself that…) because they are also human and i am THE first diagnosed autistic employee working on their restaurant… so of course they are going to… make some mistakes…

Like talking to me very sharply when there’s almost 100 (and this is not a stretch, really, sometimes it’s even MORE than that…) people coming over to our place…

(This was a one time occurrence but… it still haunts me…): when one of the owners “humiliated” me in front of another client… (context: i said very calmly after he told me to check one table if they were served by the waitress/waiter… btw, it was THEIR job to check on the tables… i was the hostess that my only job was to guide others to their table… but i’ve given up a pass because one: he’s my boss and two: i was still on my early stages of learning to work there… but after I’ve told him that they were only waiting for someone else to come so they could order (a very common occurrence), he simply gestured me to come closer and, in front of a friend of his (which is another client), he ranted about how i couldn’t defy him like “that” and that i should just do as he tells me to do… you all may not feel the fear and anxiety that i felt after his “little” rant… but i certainly felt… more explicitly: i felt like shit…)

Hypocrisy… a lot of it… like, my supervisors tell the other employees that we shouldn’t have some small talk with other departments of the restaurant… but ThEy CaN tAlK aLl ThEy WaNt! (Sometimes they even forget they are working and start talking about their life problems to others…)

Or, or! When they tell us to not get late, but guess what? They CAN get late to work! Ain’t that nice? :)

And you may be wondering… “but Mochi! If you’re unhappy there, why don’t you find another job??”

Well… i don’t know if you know this but… here in Brazil… we, as a nation, are suffering from a wave of extreme unemployment…

People younger than me are having a real hard time trying to feed their families… all of us are suffering from the extreme inequality…

And…

Here it comes my dilemma, self loathing and suicidal thoughts: i like my job… i have strong connections with everyone there… they are like a family to me! (Well, don’t really know for sure if they feel the same for me but… i do…) but… sometimes i feel like i am in a more “semi-toxic” family than a true healthy family… but at same time, if i leave… i fear i will disappoint them… disappoint my REAL family… disappoint… basically… everyone… and that i am going to come off as a little ungrateful piece of shit… that after everything they did for me (my workplace family) i left them… and i am simply going to be easily replaced… like i wasn’t even someone but… something…

I daily think about stopping existing, stopping breathing, stopping… living… and just… end it all… but (i don’t know if i should be thankful for that or not but… eh…) i guess i am too much of a coward to end myself… (thanks for my phobia of how i am going to die… i don’t fear dying… I fear how will i die and if that’s going to be painful and scary…)

I… have stopped doing what i most loved doing… writing, reading and drawing… because of my work… first, it was school… now work…

It’s… almost comical really, how i am seen by many as a robot to now serve people and only do that… (and with a BiG sMiLe On My FaCe!)

Even when i get home… i can’t stop thinking about work… when i am with my friends… when i am with my family… it’s always there… haunting me… my mind reminding every single second that i am now an adult and i should just fake it till i make it… but how long? How long till i collapse and let out a desperate scream? A cry for help?

When i am having my few happy moments… i sometimes wish i could rewind them over and over again just so i don’t have to remember that i am seen by many as just another machine to make them richer…

.

.

.

Okay… maybe i should stop trauma dumping on you all and get to the real important stuff…

I promise i will answer every question of you guys on my inbox and… today i am going to make a lot of posts just so i feel like i am not being a useless and bad friend to you guys…

And the fanfic of the Charlie and the chocolate factory is on hiatus… if that wasn’t obvious by my long absence… i really don’t know when i am going to finish that… but i promise, especially for you @cabasasa, that by the end of the year i am going to post the full AU…

And that’s it…

Now back to the normal schedule…

[sumire-no-nikki]

But Morning Came Anyway

I have a very distinct memory of November 2016.

In those days, I thought I was already such a grown up, but I was nothing more than a wide-eyed university student. I spent most of my waking hours on campus, doing nothing but school and research work. I listened to the news, watched the late night show hosts make their jokes. Debate nights were a whole affair, with food and drinks prepared—the only nights I ever paused my work. I was such a political junkie then, and proud to proclaim it. I was all too eager to engage in political conversations with other passionate students, and we wore our principles like a badge. Academia and politics—that was my way of living. Back then, I genuinely believed that we were on the brink of witnessing history. It was a thrill. Youth allowed me such bravery. I wore the “I’m With Her” shirts, I displayed the stickers on my laptop. With all my heart I wrote with such idealistic sentiments. We will overcome hate! Progress and Reason! I was still too young, too new to life. I thought I had already seen my fair share of cruelty. I look back now and think, what a foolish little girl.

On Election Night of 2016, I stayed up all night waiting for the results to roll in. I brought home some take away and set aside all school work. I wanted to be there when it happens, when history is made.

We all know how that night ended.

After the slow drip of announcements culminating in what I naively thought was impossible, I tried to put myself to sleep. But I was in such despair I didn’t know what to do with myself. In the end, I remember sending a voice memo to a friend. I mainly stuttered and sniffled, sobbing all the way through, somewhat manic. That night I felt like a dying star. One final burst before fading away in the coldness of deep space. I went to bed stripped of all optimism, my sense of justice shattered. Such fairy tale notions of youth that good will prevail and evil will be punished exposed as nothing but just that—a fairy tale. Welcome to adulthood. Welcome to the world. Something broke in me that day, something I’ll never recover.

But morning came anyway. I got two hours of sleep, somehow feeling more tired than I was before going to bed. I made my way to campus in a daze. I didn’t have my ears plugged with podcasts and music. I just listened to the train screeching, happy to have the noise mute my thoughts for a while. Crossing the street, I looked around me, surrounded by the usual crowd of busy pedestrians. I used to be able to keep up with them, subscribed to the grind, never stopping. But that morning it felt like I was being left behind, like I was fighting for every breath just trying to make it through every second that ticks away.

At my usual cafe, while waiting for my drink, I glanced at the rack of newspapers next to the counter. On the cover was Hillary Clinton, in front of a podium, wearing something purple. The headline was some witty quip about her concession. I surrendered to the stinging in my eyes. It was silly to cry in the middle of a cafe during the morning rush of all times, but I did. I cried in despair, in mortification not for crying in public but for who I am and the millions upon millions of people rejecting my very existence.

I remember thinking over and over, this can’t be. How is this possible. This is the land of progress, is it not? A country that has pushed science and technology into making unfathomable leaps, a nation of free-thinkers. This is the land of independence. How is this happening? This cannot be happening. I had all these questions and no one to answer them. All I could do was grab my order while I step into a world less vibrant than it was upturned in chaos—a world not made for me to survive. I’ll never forget that feeling.

I had a language class first thing in the morning. In the classroom, as K-sensei set up her laptop and her powerpoint slides, I began conversing with my classmates, some in tears, some laughing through it, but all in despair over what had just happened. Concerned, K-sensei approached our little huddle. In Japanese I explained why we were in tears. It was almost too cruel. I moved to this country to pursue academia because where I’m from would have never permitted such a luxury. And I wanted to feel proud of myself for explaining politics in Japanese. There I was, living my very own American dream. But nightmares are dreams too.

In the next couple of days there were rallies, talks, sit-ins. I participated in some at the campus plaza with friends and encouraged by sympathetic professors. But it was never the same after that day. Oddly enough the weather was quite sunny in the days that followed the election, too hot for November in the bay. The white buildings, the pavement reflecting all that light, it was so bright I remember needing to squint. It didn’t feel real. In the news they still talked about it like there was something that could be done. It would take a couple of years before I could listen to politics again.

These were my memories of November 2016. I’m eight years older now, my life on a completely different trajectory than I could have ever imagined then. In some ways things got worse, but in a lot of ways it got a lot better too.

When Kamala Harris took on the Democratic ticket, people were abuzz with notions of making this the year we elect the first female president of the United States once and for all. It was salvation after the doom and gloom of being stuck with Biden. It felt like a fighting chance. The whole song and dance was performed again. There’s no way a convicted felon would win! There’s so much at stake and we’ve learned from 2016! Kamala Harris will win! I wasn't devoid of hope, to be sure, but I faced this election with lessons learned. The day I cast my mail-in ballot for her, I cautioned myself: it gets worse before it gets better.

That may seem negative, and I suppose it is in a fashion. But for all that I’ve experienced, all the trials I’ve been put through, it is this one adage that hasn’t failed me yet, hackneyed it may be. Because it’s not if it gets better. It is a question of when. Things will look up again. It will. It is as true as Winter thawing and Spring blooming after it. But it requires courage and hard work to get to the part when the sun shines again. So we all have to do what it takes to get there.

The election happened. Things will get worse from here. Trump will be back in office, both chambers red. But we will adapt. We build muscle. We hone our skills. There are hard truths to confront, mentalities to shift. It was a grim Tuesday. But morning came anyway. Here we are, the world a bleaker place than it was yesterday. But it will get better. It will. Time hasn't stopped. We will move forward.

Do not mistake this as optimism. What this entails is hard-earned perseverance and dogged determination. It might not be inspiring to be pragmatic but it is what gets one foot in front of the other when emotions are too heavy and threatening to drag your head underwater. I’ve written this rather messy stream of consciousness, hoping to cope, trying not to let the anger fester. I’m not sure what this accomplishes but this is survival.

What has transpired in the past twenty-four hours is too fresh a wound, blood still flowing. So talk. Cry. Dress the wound. Let it scab. It will heal but it needs tending. Be kind--this too takes hard work and practice. Be kind to others, and most especially to yourself.

[sasquapossum]

"What should Israel do, if not this?"

That seems to be a common reply when anyone criticizes Israel's unwarranted escalation in Gaza. Usually it's accompanied by some kind of insinuation that the critic hates Israel and wants all Jewish people to die. See my well poisoning post about why that's a bullshit coward's tactic (unless it's deliberate disinformation, which that post also covers). I'll get to my answer in a moment, but first...

I do condemn Hamas, and particularly their recent actions. Strongly. Unequivocally. I mourn the loss of innocent life and dignity. I condemn those actions because I mourn those things, which is also why I condemn Israel's actions both before and after. I have always been and always will be less focused on Israel vs. Palestine, which is an enormously complex issue, than on choosing peace and compassion over violence and hate. That's the only side I'm really on, and it cuts across both traditional "sides" in most of these discussions. All I want is to minimize suffering - for the people of Palestine, for the people of Israel (many of whom disagree with their so-called leadership), and for Jewish people worldwide who are already being caught in the backlash.

OK, so am I allowed to have an opinion now? If you still insist the answer is no, GTFO or get blocked. Fallacies, disinformation, and gatekeeping are not welcome here. (OK, maybe some gatekeeping, but only by me because it's the gate to my room.) Warmongers are even less welcome. Are we down to just the sane people now? Good. Here's my answer to what Israel should do.

Not what the fucking US did after fucking 9/11

Invading Afghanistan, and particularly Iraq, was a mistake (which many of us pointed out at the time BTW). The latter was, of course, based on lies. Both cost trillions of dollars and - more importantly - millions of lives, to little lasting positive effect. Maybe we could have done some good in either place, independently of 9/11, with application of similar resources in different ways, but that is really a different discussion. For now, I'll just say what we actually did in the immediate aftermath of 9/11 represents a colossal failure to achieve any of our stated goals. Those people, "ours" or "theirs" or anyone, died for nothing.

What did eventually make al Qaeda less of a threat to peace? The term of art here is decapitation. We took out the leaders, one by one. That effort involved intelligence, often derived from cooperation with other countries including those we don't particularly like, and precision weapons or strike teams. We didn't have to "flatten" Abbottabad to eliminate bin Laden, or Kabul to eliminate al Zawahiri, and so on. One could argue that we were still in the wrong, but those actions were far less injurious and thus far less wrong than what we had been doing previously.

That brings us back to the present day. Israel has a highly capable intelligence apparatus, widely considered to be among the best in the world. It has precision weapons, ditto. Their ability to deliver precise violence to specific targets might be unparalleled, and has in fact been demonstrated many times. It was even demonstrated (though inconsistently used) the last time this particular conflict flared up. Anyone who wants to comment on Israel's actions needs to do so based on an understanding that these capabilities exist, and that their use was deliberately foregone. They weren't used to prevent this tragedy, and they're not being used to avoid the next one (or the inevitable next one after that, and so on ad nauseam) either.

I have many more thoughts about who in Israel or elsewhere has done what, and why, to produce a worse-than-necessary situation here. I'll set those aside for now, out of respect to people who are still suffering or grieving. I'll just leave this one thought: if someone can take actions which minimize suffering, and instead takes actions which increase it, then that's a choice. It's the warmonger's choice, regardless of culture or religion or circumstances leading up to it. That applies to Hamas, but not to Hamas alone. It's a universal principle.

What Israel should do is learn from the US's mistakes, not repeat them. For their own sake.

[wearingaberetinparis]

Fic Author Self-Rec

Thank you for tagging me @missgryffin and @kay-elle-cee! Those that know me, will recognise that I find it very difficult not to be critical of my own work, but I need to be proud of what I write more often, so this is good practice! (Also: how do you choose anyway? Every fic is my baby and there are so many memories attached to writing them.) Rules: When you get this, reply with your favourite fics that you've written. Then pass it on to fice other writers. Spread some self love.

Shout Out To My Ex (Series)

Phoenix Radio is going through a rough period with the arrival of the new and controversial Riddle Radio. Albus Dumbledore, founder of the country’s number one radio station, asks his team to get ready to rebrand. Gone are the days of family friendly radio, a show where two exes talk about where their relationship went wrong and deliver relationship advice live on air, named Shout Out To My Ex, is exactly what Phoenix Radio needs. Who better to co-host this show than Lily Evans and James Potter, two Phoenix Radio employees who absolutely despise each other, or do they? A Jily Modern AU inspired by Rachel Lynn Solomon’s "The Ex Talk". LINK HERE

ocean eyes (Series)

Lily Evans had been eleven when she and her family moved in next door to the Potters. It was the summer before she would start her year at Hogwarts, a prestigious school for gifted students. From their bedrooms, James and Lily witness each other’s highs and lows, watching the other grow as they go through life apart and yet very much together. A Jily Neighbours/Coming of Age AU LINK HERE

(Didn't I?) (Didn't I?) Didn't I See You Crying?

James Potter has fancied Mary Macdonald for as long as he can remember. Everything about her is practically perfect, except for – if he were being honest and he always liked to be – her choice in friends. For Mary’s best friend, Lily Evans, is a right shrew and, much to his dismay, the Head Girl to his Head Boy. Lily Evans had disliked James Potter with a passion after their first interaction on the Hogwarts Express. A dislike that turned into hate – never mind that she also has an infatuation going, but no one needs to know about that – as soon as he decided to make her life a living hell. Unfortunately for her, he also decided (a few years earlier) that her very best friend in the world was the worthy object of his affections. (Which was fine, really. She wasn't about to cry over it, for Godric's sake. She was a strong and independent young woman, thank you very much. And yes, perhaps she was a little in love, but it was all for nothing, so she had to keep calm and carry on.) Certainly, their complicated past would result in major disaster if common ground was not soon established. For the love of Merlin, though, why did either of them think it would be a good idea for Lily to help James woo Mary Macdonald? LINK HERE

The Very (Un)Ladylike Guide To Fortune-Hunting

"Without thinking highly either of men or matrimony, marriage had always been her object; it was the only honourable provision for well-educated young women of small fortune, and however uncertain of giving happiness, must be their pleasantest preservative from want." (Jane Austen) Lily Evans finds herself wanting, or: so her sister seems to believe. While out on the hunt for a fortune - again: that would be Mrs Dursley mostly - the affection of a number of suitors is most welcome. Especially when a young Viscount's heart is set aflame. A Regency Jily AU. LINK HERE

Lily In The Sky With Diamonds

A series of interviews with the UK’s hottest band, The Marauders, and the singer-songwriter Lily Evans, conducted by Nymphadora Tonks, as they prepare for the UK Tour after the release of their album “Lily in the Sky with Diamonds”. Everyone worships The Marauders. Everyone loves Lily Evans. Together they make hearts bleed. Inspired by "Daisy Jones & The Six" by Taylor Jenkins Reid. LINK HERE

Tagging anyone that would like to do this, but @annabtg and @practicecourts as well. I'm sorry if you did this already. I was obviously MIA for a couple of days.

[chalecbooks]

Chapter 1 - Perfect Shades of Red

Follow my insta -charles_.lec16

Summary: Charles and Madyson meet in unexpected conditions… will they continue together or go their separate ways.

Go to masterlist to find other parts to this series

Part 1/?

"Oh fuck!" Madyson shrieked before collapsing on her bed. "I swear to god I am the unluckiest person on this planet" she mumbled into her pillow before forcing herself off the bed and back to packing, she hated storms and with her luck the evening before she was meant to fly out to university there is a storm warning, a code red at that. "it's always the colour red" she mumbled as she jumped on her suitcase to try and close it. She wasn't expecting to fly out tomorrow anymore, her flight would probably be canceled due to weather. It was disappointing but not the end of the world, she could fly out in a day or two and still have time to settle in as school only stared in a week and a bit.

Finally closing her suitcase, she wandered off to the kitchen looking for something to eat. 2 minutes is not a long time but when you're waiting for your food to heat up it feels like forever. Staring at the small dish of noodles go around and around in the microwave is a tedious game but Madyson had nothing else to do until her phone rang forcing her to lose the staring competition with the noodles. "See even the weather doesn't want you to leave me" the voice of her best friend echoed thew the kitchen as Madyson put her friend on speaker allowing her to use her hand to finally get the noodles.

"Yes Phe, the weather doesn't want me to move! That makes so much sense." Madyson said sarcastically trying to suppress her giggles, "okay fine! But Mads you sure your going to be okay?" Phoenix said sounding worried for her best friend. "Yes, I'll be fine, I've lived alone for 2 years since we graduated the only difference now is that I will be in a different country" Mads assured her friend before shoving her mouth with food. "I know you will be fine with that you independent piece of shit! I meant with the storm coming... I know you hate them." Phe said laughing at Mads confusion on what she meant.

Just as Mads was about to reply when the rain suddenly started bucketing down and just as Mads thought it couldn't get any worse the loud sound of thunder sent shockwaves through her heart. "yea. I'm fine" she replied before quickly hanging up, not wanting to cry on the call.

"shhhhhhhhh, it's okay Mads just go close the curtains and snuggle up on the couch" she instructed herself trying to calm her rapid breaths and stop the quickly approaching tears. Knowing this was only the beginning she walked to the window to close the curtains preparing for the weather to only get worse she was planning so just listen to music and snuggle on the couch. As she walked over, she clicked repeat play on her favorite song "Till forever falls apart" mumbling the song she approached the window. "if the tide takes California, I'm so glad I got to- WHAT THE FUCK" she shouted as she looked outside the window to see someone sitting on the side of the road in the rain.

Now it was a test of morals, go outside in the rain and see if the man was okay and inform him that there was a storm warning, or the more enjoyable option close the curtains and leave the potential murderer alone...

Deciding to leave the potential killer alone Madyson wrapped herself in a warm blanket because she was cold only wearing shorts and a crop top. Grabbed her noodles and book before flopping on her couch and opening her book she was reading for the 2 time, it took 30 seconds, 30 seconds for the guilt to get to her and make her get up off the couch and put boots on.

She didn't see the point in dressing in warm clothes as she would surely be soaked to the bone when she got back and didn't want more laundry than necessary, as she reached the door the realization hit. Her umbrella was already packed, "oh well my good luck continues" Mads mumbles peeking through the door to see how bad the conditions were. Quickly she opened the door before slamming it shut again so no water got in the house.

Still hiding under the little roof on the front step she could fell her heat increase speed, "Madyson Fisher, you are not allowed to have a panic attack now" she scolded herself and without giving her mind time to create flashbacks she was walking down the path in the rain. The man seemed to be completely zoned out she may have even thought he was dead if he wasn't sitting up right. As she slowly walked towards the man the thunder and rain got harder "come Mads, pick up the pace" she whispered to herself breaking into a run as she got closer.

Now she was two feet away from the man who was still yet to notice her, "um excuse me Sir are you aware there is a storm warning for tonight?" Madyson asked them man after tapping him on the shoulder.

"Oh, um no I wasn't thank you" the man looked up at her his beautiful green orbs starting at her before quicky replying in a thick French accent before turning to face Madyson and getting up. Madyson in complete awe of the man's gorgeous face had completely forgotten about the storm. "Do you know where the Protea Hotel is from here?" the man asked still a bit shocked that such a beautiful girl would come out in the rain to see if he was okay.

"oh, that's like 1 hour way, how did you get here then?" Mads asked now interested in this man's story still completely oblivious to the worsening storm around them. "I walked" He mumbled before looking down and scratching the back of his neck clearly ashamed that he was so reckless, "well, my house is just there. So if you want to stay the night you can... it's too dangerous to drive or walk anywhere now." She said trying to get the two of them out the storm as she finally realized it was hailing now.

"Are you sure? I really don't want to ruin your evening" He said lifting his hands above his head to protect it from the hard snowballs falling from the sky. "Yes, it's no problem. Now if you would like to follow me before one of us gets hit in the head with a large hail ball" She shouted over the sound of hail hitting the ground The man just laughed before both broke out into a sprint towards the house.

Reaching the house Madyson quickly opened the door for both of them and just as quickly closed it, the two of them looked at each other for a second before both bursting out laughing. After finally regaining herself control Mads put her hand out "My name is Madyson, but everyone calls me Mads" She smiled "Charles" he said returning an even bigger smile.

[ellcrys]

15 questions

Tagged by @itstimetodrew~!! Thanks for the tag!! ☺️

1. Are you named after anyone?

No, I don't think so! I think my parents just went through the list of baby names for girls and settled on Joanna lol.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Uhh... I teared up watching one of the episodes of Blue Eye Samurai a couple days ago but the last time I Cried was on my flight back to Boston last Friday rewatching episode three of The Last of Us lmaoo. (I was like SURELY I won't cry on my nth rewatch... #rip to me)

3. Do you have kids?

*Puts on my meme hat* What am I a child bride?

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

Swimming and soccer growing up. I did ballet for like a year or two also when I was like 5. Since graduating college I haven't really done any sports, just working out at the gym pre-pandemic and then at home since the pandemic, although one of my friends is trying to start a pickup soccer group which I'll probs join if it takes off. Do want to get back into swimming again also. That's on my 2024 todo list. I've tried running as a hobby enough times to know that I suck at it and that I hate it lmao.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Does anyone not? lol

6. What is the first thing you notice about people?

Hmm, probably their outfit; I enjoy seeing people's different styles!

7. What's your eye color?

Brown <3

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings!!

9. Any talents?

Ugh, no?? I can't think of anything lol. Being a procrastinator and the ultimate lazy bum (only half joking). idk man, I used to be proud of my writing and amv skills but I haven't seriously tried to write anything in probably a decade and I don't think I'm ever getting back into making amvs lol. Letting things go/being resilient maybe? I'm at the point in my life where everything is just 'it is what it is', but I think I've always been good at moving on from things tbh. Life's too short to dwell.

10. Where were you born?

Wisconsin of all states lol

11. What are your hobbies?

Nothing creative anymore, that's for sure (#rip). Uh, I love going out and doing things. I'm the furthest thing from a homebody so being trapped at home during the pandemic drove me nuts. Things I do on the regular include visiting independent bookstores, art museums, and seeing shows. I try to travel/see someplace new on the regular, whether that's going out of state/country or walking through a new neighborhood in the Boston area. I love eating, definitely a foodie. I read a lot (more fanfic than actual lit these days whoops) and watch a lot of tv. I also enjoy just walking around and people watching (will frequently walk around the neighborhood/city without any real purpose in mind as I go crazy if I'm cooped up in my apt for too long). I also love sending snail mail and exchange postcards monthly with a friend in London, and send holiday cards/postcards to family/friends when I travel. I guess documenting my interests on Tumblr can also be considered a hobby considering how much time I spend on here lmao.

12. Do you have any pets?

No, but I plan to adopt a cat when I (hopefully) get my own place!

13. How tall are you?

5'4" :')

I'd love another two inches... just two measly inches :')))

14. Favorite subject in school?

Growing up, probably math. I was good at it, and I loved how logical it was. I also really enjoyed chem, probably because it was the most math adjacent science (hilariously though, I hated physics). In college obviously computer science, my major. Though I've always loved my literature classes also.

15. Dream job?

Man I'd love to open and own an independent bookstore/cafe. Dream job for real.

Tagging (if you want!) @lordsardine, @goldshitter, @akechikurusus, @popflythesky, and anyone else who wants to do this!

[kika501]

A hot take:

I was watching bones and all and could not help but have the profound realization that white America are like cannibals. The feast on the the body of color, whether it be Latino, native, southeast Asian, etc, but especially upon the black body. They consume all that there is to consume: our food, our music, our voices, our art, our words, our poetry, our creativity, and our culture. But that's not all, they always want- NEED, more. They consume our bodies, our labor, our time, our blood, sweat, tears, mind, heart, liver, every single morsel they consume. Bones and all.

And once the hunger is temporarily sated, they go to their white pickett homes, stomachs full and warm and. Then they gaslight us into believing that we are lesser. They pack us like animals into pens of poverty and say it is our fault that we live in such a state. They mock us for our culture and creativity that they so readily consume. They say stop and wait your turn. Don't you see this is the land of the free?

As a black woman in America, I live in such fear that all that I have will be taken away. I fear for my love ones, my little brother and cousins. I live in such fear that I refuse to have childern in this country, for where would I go? To the doctor that mutilates my body, forces a c section when not needed, refuse anesthetics because they are taught that black people can't feel pain (and yes even in 2023). Why would I bring a black baby girl or boy into a world that hates them? No matter were we go we are met with mockery, disdain and violence. Our original homes are raped continuously by colonizers so that I am force to seek sanctuary in their arms. Why would I bring a child to such a world that seeks to erase and rewrite our history so white America can still believe the lie that this is a country stands freedom, independence, and justice for all?

I cry myself to sleep knowing there is no where to run to find peace. That, at 22 years old, I find comfort in knowing that I will die one day and it will be finally over. I will decay in the ground were my skin with rot away and they can no longer eat my body because it is black. This is America. This is what this country means to me.

Please understand that this is coming from a state of confusion, hurt and betrayal. The recent political climate and events have really sent me spiraling. I've come to the realization that I don't want to live here anymore. I don't feel safe. Every day there are pick up truck waving Trump flags and blue lives matter passing by my house. My neighbors wave these flags. I no longer feel safe being surrounded by white men as a black woman. I hate being constantly reminded of my skin color. I hate knowing that by brother could just be skate boarding down the street and some cop can harass him and arrest him for no reason. That no punishment will occur. I have no trust in the the police force, for they are just another gang and tool for white supremacy. I don't want to know my body could be beaten and tossed aside and not one thing would change about this country. I'm tired. Even though I understand this sounds like a generalization of white people, it's not. It's an observation of the collective white identity and whiteness and how it makes me feel. While I'm open to conversation, I know no one cares. No one will change their mind no matter how much I scream, beg and cry. No matter how much facts you place upon them they will never see us human but nothing more than the fuel that sustains there body and way of life.

Either way it was eating me inside and I just was desperate to share.

[inkisadream]

1. Cheers to the person in this hotel who just let out an enormous burp in the hallway.

2. No cheers to the shower at this 4-star hotel (that I am not paying for, don’t worry; doing absolutely nothing to make it happen aside, I have not become independently wealthy) that started whistling like it was going to explode a minute into my shower once I was all wet and had to keep going, even though it was 10:30 p.m. and presumably people are trying to sleep.

2b. (jk no one ever sleeps in this country)

2c. (ps who is going to teach the British and also the Europeans about top sheets. who is going to sacrifice themselves for the rest of us.)

3. I was so stressed about having to travel for work in amongst a gazillion tasks that have to get done but I went to a yuppie café in Holborn, ordered a green juice off of the menu that said it would “clear my head”...and it did almost immediately and I have proceeded to drink more green juices.

3b. (this is the most and only California thing I have ever said)

4. London rises earlier than the rest of the country, and something in me might be broken but I cannot tell you how affirming it was to walk into a Pret at 8 a.m. and have there be no seats left, then to snag one by the window and watch masses and masses of people go by. 

5. Generally speaking I hate terrorism-focused conferences because they are way too state-oriented and tend to be lots of white men gassing each other up, but this one involved exactly one white man panelist across two days and folks were On Board and it almost made me want to stay in this field.

5b. (almost)

[manditaonee]

It's important to hear and feel social class hatred and social class understanding from an American; and it's important to be able to see reality as it is. But there are some points that are so FUNDAMENTALLY Cultural of Americans. And that is ok. It's ok that you see the problems of your nation and think: That's not right, that is unfair. However, a "third world country" can and WILL have perceptions that are beyond of what our own countries shows as propaganda, and, surely, what the U.S.A shows ABOUT US as propaganda.

If one studies and understand the History of Latin America, it's easy to understand why we hate Americans, not individually but as an entity: Your country supported and aided coups and dictatorships here in South America. Coups that tortured and killed many. In the name of "Fighting Communism".

And many Americans while poor as fuck, see us Latinos as a subrace - yes, in that terms; some of you guys are fucking racist and xenophobics. And when our people meet one, two, three, ten, many of your people who are like that, well... We can't be judged for being biased. Some of you see us, our cultures, our history, our lands, our people as your backyard, where anything you want goes.

And I'm terribly sorry and always moved when there are human rights violations in the U.S.A, however there's so many, just SO many more violations when you are from a "Third World Country" - A little girl has just been shot in the head by cops the other day, she was three years old, she was poor, she lived in favela, she was black. And nothing happened. Nothing HAPPENS life keeps just... Going, because that kind of violence is normatized in Brazil and many other countries in Latin America. People here have it harder; black people here have it hardest. It breaks my heart when my students say they are afraid that they might not go back home, that the only meal they have in the morning is the juice and the crackers we give them (Because that is the ONLY thing we can give them to eat), that they won't NEVER be able to leave the favelas - they are too incompetent, too poor or too black for success; but that is the thing, it's probably truth, this is our reality. And believe me, I know that black people have it hard in the U.S.A as well, I know that they suffer from the VERY SAME fears, I know that racism is the murderer and persecutor of great, kind, lovable and innocent people... But it's hard to not feel bothered or even offended if an American, that WILL BE treated very, very, very pleasantly here in my country - independently of race and color - states that you got it hard, because that just shows that you have NO IDEA how it is going in other places, that are just as bad or worse in this social problem in specific.

Also, it's important to state that, sadly, many of our hatred is not just because you are "Lazy, Dumb, Have it Easy"... This is propaganda as well. We hate Americans because you see yourselves as the protagonist of the Story, not the protagonist of your story (As a Nation), but the Story as the WHOLE WORLD'S Story. And that makes you blind to other people's and other nations' story. The fact that there are some affirmations about poverty in the U.S.A - Which are absolutely valid and completely full of righteousness - and, while sparce, about the perception of "Third Worlds Countries" shows exactly that. You clearly know little about, for example, a favela in Diadema:

THIS IS POVERTY FOR US:

So when tackling such delicate subject as "Why we, Americans, are hated for?" it's important to take in consideration that it's more than simple envy or pettiness. It's mostly because your people frequently see yourselves as the protagonist or the greatest - Which, as you said yourself, is a lie - and dismiss other people's suffering and struggles, are bigoted towards us and fuck up a lot in other countries. It's not gratuitous, our hatred.

To wrap this up, I want to say that this is not to, in any way, attack you or dismiss your struggles! As I said, it's grand that you are analysing your own reality with consideration and a critical eye. Just pay attention to not reproduce the exact behavior that makes so many people angry or bothered towards Americans - Remember that there are propaganda being sold and bought even in your biases.

I literally don't care when people are like "haha americans are so annoying/dumb/whatever" cuz I can take a joke, but I've been seeing tags on posts of mine from people who like. Deeply, Viscerally, Venomously Hate USAmericans.

They see us as the privileged oppressor class of the world who willfully and gleefully fuck everyone else over so "we" can enjoy luxuries. Our big cars, our extravagant restaurants, our Disney World and McMansions, right?

And it makes something inside me die a little bit, because the USA distributes TV shows, movies, magazines, newspapers and advertisements that tell you what America is like and what luxuries Americans enjoy...

...and it's propaganda. It's propaganda, not reality. These images and mythology of a luxurious, affluent America are so inescapable, constant and penetrating, like radiation, that even Americans believe it even in spite of reality around them.

It hurts that the propaganda is all anyone sees outside the USA as well, is what I mean to say, because inside the USA it's the same. I feel average, not poor, but I have always been demeaned by these depictions that tell me, "This is a normal American" showing financial privileges I would never hope to have and that my mother or her mother would never have been able to even imagine.

Like I looked up "average american neighborhood" on google images

And there are articles from American papers and publications that use these stock photos as images of an "American neighborhood" or "American homes" and it feels like being chipped away bit by bit, because when I was in middle school I went to the house of my friend and my friend's mom asked me condescending questions about whether my family ate instant noodles and "frozen food" (which they were too good for) and that year I was too humiliated to invite any of my wealthier friends over to my house, and yet they did not live in houses as big as the houses in these photos. THIS IS NOT AVERAGE. AVERAGE AMERICANS DO NOT LIVE HERE. WHAT THE HELL. There is a neighborhood in my town that looks like this and in my head I call it the "rich people neighborhood."

I come from the Americans that live here

and mobile homes/trailers are around 12% of houses in my state, so it's not rare, and when my mom was growing up everybody she knew lived in one of these. But this isn't what the world is shown. And even in America when this is shown it's something to be gawked at and pitied.

"Americans buy fast fashion every month and on average only wear it a couple times" I wear my clothes until they're falling apart and many of the clothes i have now are hand-me-downs from my mom or from Goodwill. "Americans eat out at restaurants all the time" Growing up I would eat out at Red Lobster as a treat with my dad about once a year, and sometimes we couldn't afford that. "Americans work so much because they're so obsessed with money" when I was a kid I remember when my dad would sometimes be working until 11pm or later at his construction and remodeling job, coming home exhausted and covered in drywall dust, and we barely got to see him because he was trying to dig us out of our house imminently going into foreclosure.

And I know that I have it so much better than so many people that came before me. Compared with the world my mom grew up in, I grew up in a world of fabulous luxury. My Mamaw's family was sharecroppers and by the time she was highschool age she started working in the cotton mills making gold-toe socks. And being white they've got a position of relative privilege even then. At least they didn't face violence and hatred over the color of their skin.

Why do the articles and writings say "Americans" live in big houses and eat in extravagant restaurants, but they don't say "Americans" live in flimsy, non-permanent structures propped up on cinder blocks and eat whatever cheap processed food is sold at the Dollar General, which is the only store for miles around and doesn't even sell fresh fruits or vegetables?

We're all trained to identify ourselves with the folks in the big houses, not the folks who have to camp out under tarps underneath the bridge, but I would say more of us are closer to the second one than the first. The images of America don't look like people I would talk to and hang out with, they look like the people that used to look down on me and my family like we were less than.

Fact is, "americans have it sooooo much better than all those people in third world countries, everybody there would kill to have the privileges you have" is a fundamental key part of the propaganda, and the purpose is to make Americans, especially poor Americans, think they're fundamentally different than working class people in other countries.

The mythology that the USA is the best place on Earth is a threat. Truth be told, a lot of poor folks are panicky conservative reactionaries in part because they can't afford to travel and see what the cities are like, let alone another country, and they have been told their whole lives that this is the best possible society, and they are scared to death of things getting worse.

Idk where i'm going with this, I just think seeing nation states as discrete categories of people that have more in common with each other than they do with anybody outside their country is a nefarious piece of propaganda

and also I have seen people claiming specifically that Black people in America have it better than the rest of the world by virtue of being American, which is so fucking stupid but i didn't wanna start shit but now i'm sick and in bed and kinda do

we are more alike than we are unalike and the people that say otherwise are mostly trying to get us to identify with a nation state that sees us as lower than garbage

[misfitwashere]

July 24, 2024

Heather Cox Richardson

Jul 25, 2024

Tonight, President Joe Biden explained to the American people why he decided to refuse the 2024 Democratic presidential nomination and hand the torch to Vice President Kamala Harris. 

Speaking from the Oval Office from his seat behind the Resolute Desk, a gift from Queen Victoria to President Rutherford B. Hayes in 1880, Biden recalled the nation’s history. He invoked Thomas Jefferson, who wrote the Declaration of Independence; George Washington, who “showed us presidents are not kings”; Abraham Lincoln, who “implored us to reject malice”; and Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who “inspired us to reject fear.”

And then he turned to himself. “I revere this office, but I love my country more,” he said. “It’s been the honor of my life to serve as your president.” But, he said, the defense of democracy is more important than any title, and democracy is “larger than any one of us.” We must unite to protect it. 

“In recent weeks, it has become clear to me that I need to unite my party in this critical endeavor,” he said. “I believe my record as president, my leadership in the world, my vision for America’s future, all merited a second term. But nothing, nothing can come in the way of saving our democracy. That includes personal ambition. So I’ve decided the best way forward is to pass the torch to a new generation. It’s the best way to unite our nation.”

There is “a time and a place for long years of experience in public life,” Biden said. “There’s also a time and a place for new voices, fresh voices, yes, younger voices. And that time and place is now.”

Biden reminded listeners that he is not leaving the presidency and will be continuing to use its power for the American people. In outlining what that means, he summed up his presidency. 

For the next six months, he said, he will “continue to lower costs for hard-working families [and] grow our economy. I will keep defending our personal freedoms and civil rights, from the right to vote to the right to choose. I will keep calling out hate and extremism, making it clear there is…no place in America for political violence or any violence ever, period. I’m going to keep speaking out to protect our kids from gun violence [and] our planet from [the] climate crisis.”

Biden reiterated his support for his Cancer Moonshot to end cancer—a personal cause for him since the 2015 death of his son Beau from brain cancer—and says he will fight for it, (although House Republicans have recently slashed funding for the program). He said he will call for reforming the Supreme Court “because this is critical to our democracy.”

He promised to continue “working to ensure America remains strong, secure and the leader of the free world,” and pointed out that he is “the first president of this century to report to the American people that the United States is not at war anywhere in the world.” He promised to continue rallying a coalition of nations to stop Putin’s attempt to take over Ukraine, and vowed to continue to build the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO). He reminded listeners that when he took office, the conventional wisdom was that China would inevitably surpass the United States, but that is no longer the case, and he said he would continue to strengthen allies and partners in the Pacific. 

Biden promised to continue to work to “end the war in Gaza, bring home all the hostages and bring peace and security to the Middle East and end this war,” as well as “to bring home Americans being unjustly detained all around the world.”

The president reminded people how far the nation has come since he took office on January 20, 2021, a day when, although he didn’t mention it tonight, he went directly to work after taking the oath of office. “On that day,” he recalled, “we…stood in a winter of peril and winter of possibilities.” The United States was “in the grip of the worst pandemic in the century, the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression, the worst attack on our democracy since the Civil War.” But, Biden said, “We came together as Americans. We got through it. We emerged stronger, more prosperous and more secure.”

“Today we have the strongest economy in the world, creating nearly 16 million new jobs—a record. Wages are up, inflation continues to come down, the racial wealth gap is the lowest it’s been in 20 years. We are literally rebuilding our entire nation—urban, suburban and rural and tribal communities. Manufacturing has come back to America. We are leading the world again in chips and science and innovation. We finally beat Big Pharma after all these years to lower the cost of prescription drugs for seniors…. More people have health care today in America than ever before.” Biden noted that he signed the PACT Act to help millions of veterans and their families who were exposed to toxic materials, as well as the “most significant climate law…in the history of the world” and “the first major gun safety law in 30 years.”

The “violent crime rate is at a 50-year low,” he said, and “[b]order crossings are lower today than when the previous administration left office. I’ve kept my commitment to appoint the first Black woman to the Supreme Court of the United States of America. I also kept my commitment to have an administration that looks like America and [to] be a president for all Americans.”

Then Biden turned from his own record to the larger meaning of America.

“I ran for president four years ago because I believed…that the soul of America was at stake,” he said. “America is an idea. An idea stronger than any army, bigger than any ocean, more powerful than any dictator or tyrant. It’s the most powerful idea in the history of the world.” 

“We hold these truths to be self-evident,” he said. “We are all created equal, endowed by our creator with certain inalienable rights: life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness. We’ve never fully lived up to…this sacred idea—but we’ve never walked away from it either. And I do not believe the American people will walk away from it now.

“In just a few months, the American people will choose the course of America’s future. I made my choice…. “[O]ur great vice president, Kamala Harris… is experienced, she is tough, she is capable. She’s been an incredible partner to me and a leader for our country.

“Now the choice is up to you, the American people. When you make that choice, remember the words of Benjamin Franklin hanging on my wall here in the Oval Office, alongside the busts of Dr. [Martin Luther] King and Rosa Parks and Cesar Chavez. When Ben Franklin was asked, as he emerged from the [constitutional] convention…, whether the founders [had] given America a monarchy or a republic, Franklin’s response was: ‘A republic, if you can keep it.’... Whether we keep our republic is now in your hands.” 

“My fellow Americans, it’s been the privilege of my life to serve this nation for over 50 years,” President Biden told the American people. “Nowhere else on Earth could a kid with a stutter from modest beginnings in Scranton, Pennsylvania, and in Claymont, Delaware, one day sit behind the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office as the president of the United States, but here I am.

“That’s what’s so special about America. We are a nation of promise and possibilities. Of dreamers and doers. Of ordinary Americans doing extraordinary things. I’ve given my heart and my soul to our nation, like so many others. And I’ve been blessed a million times in return with the love and support of the American people. I hope you have some idea how grateful I am to all of you.

The great thing about America is, here kings and dictators do not rule—the people do. History is in your hands. The power’s in your hands. The idea of America lies in your hands. You just have to keep faith—keep the faith—and remember who we are. We are the United States of America, and there is simply nothing, nothing beyond our capacity when we do it together. So let’s act together, [and] preserve our democracy. God bless you all and may God protect our troops. 

“Thank you.”

And with that, President Joe Biden followed the example of the nation’s first president, George Washington, who declined to run for a third term to demonstrate that the United States of America would not have a king, and of its second president, John Adams, who handed the power of the presidency over to his rival Thomas Jefferson and thus established the nation’s tradition of the peaceful transition of power. Like them, Biden gave up the pursuit of power for himself in order to demonstrate the importance of democracy. 

After the speech, the White House served ice cream to the Bidens and hundreds of White House staffers in the Rose Garden.

And when the evening was over, First Lady Dr. Jill Biden posted an image of a handwritten note on social media. It read: “To those who never wavered, to those who refused to doubt, to those who always believed, my heart is full of gratitude. Thank you for the trust you put in Joe—now it’s time to put that trust in Kamala.” 

—

[11919815125]

3/27/24

in regards to the phone call about the future/my ambitions

i think the reason it strikes a nerve when you bring stuff like that up is because like. my entire self-worth is built on choosing to accept my shortcomings rather than fight them or feel shame about them. when you're upset that i "don't care" it's because it was a choice that i had to make in order to cope and survive. when i was 24 years old, i was living with my parents, unemployed for almost a year and a half, no intent to use the degree that i went thousands of dollars into debt for, smoking weed every day, barely even leaving my bedroom, no goals or ambitions. i was a fucking loser. i couldn't look my parents in the eye because i saw disappointment looking back at me. i cut off almost all of my friends because i didn't want them to see me like that. the embarrassment of it all nearly drove me to suicide.

i had to decide that it was okay. that i didn't need to be successful in the ways other people define it, that i didn't need a career, that i didn't need to make my parents proud, that i didn't have to be special, that i didn't need people to like me, that i didn't have to achieve my dreams. i just needed to survive and try my best to be happy; anything beyond that is just a bonus.

it's not that the things you're asking me for are unfair, but they pop that bubble. they knock down the jenga tower i've stacked up so carefully. caring so much about those pressures and goals and ambitions genuinely ruined my life and almost ended it, and now you're asking me to make them a priority again, and suggesting that if i don't it's because i don't care enough about you or that i don't care about myself.

i feel that i am successful!!!!! with my worthless degree and my shitty kitchen job and everything i have going on now!!!!! this is not failure to me! i am so unbelievably proud of myself! i am paying my bills, living independently, working full time, doing my best to maintain the relationships i have, traveling when i can, cooking delicious meals and trying new foods, going out and making memories on the weekends, spending so many of my days with you. that's a life that's worth celebrating and i really hate that you seem to see it as the bare minimum. of course i can do better, i can invest more into the things that matter to me.......i just don't know if those are the things that matter to you.

saying that "a career is not a priority to me" is really the polite way of saying, "i do not want a career, and if i can find a way to keep living my life without having to do that, i absolutely will." you dedicate years of your life building marketable skills, going to school, interning, networking, busting your ass and stressing yourself out to get...what? your life looks exactly the same with a little more cash in the bank and a few more rooms in your apartment. it's so cliche but i really really don't care about the "rat race." i don't feel the impulse to keep up with other people, i don't value most of the things that you gain from playing the game, and i definitely don't give a fuck what anyone else thinks about how i choose to live my life.

i value freedom, autonomy, authenticity, and honesty above anything else. i value working as little as possible while still being comfortable and happy, and maximizing the time that is mine and mine alone. i value the people that love and embrace me and being able to share this life with them. i value experiences over anything material; nice houses and fancy dinners and expensive clothes and flashy gifts mean absolutely nothing to me. i want to go bungee jumping, i want to see the northern lights, i want to visit every country in the world, i want to cover my body in tattoos and sleep under the stars and get married to somebody i love and learn to play guitar and create beautiful things with my bare hands and hope that one day i wake up and see my life as a beautiful thing too.

and you wanna ask me about a fuckin job lol