#nothing in-system thankfully
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Ohhhh fellas, Mama Cookie is not doing well.
#cookie.txt#txt#depression is slaughtering me#i'm having that thing where you have a ton of fun and then when it ends your chemicals do that thing#where they make you question if you actually had fun or are just an annoying loser#but that's just kind of the tip of the iceberg#a LOT is going on#nothing in-system thankfully#i can turn to jol or lobo or shane or anyone else#anything affecting our system is external factors
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Fluent Freshman - Part 32
PREV
He had the first week back from Thanksgiving break off from both classes and practice.
The week off of classes leaves FF feeling like getting stabbed has been a net positive experience for him.
First he feels like it really cemented the apparent friendship he had with at least Andrew and Neil. Second, he technically had a job offer in his Freshman year. Third, and most important, his language professor who had wanted him to come and speak to his gen-ed Latin class of over 100 students told him not to worry about it and that he had gotten one of FFâs friends to agree to the presentation instead.
His relief was so immediate and all-consuming that he hadnât even had the energy to pretend he was upset that he had been replaced. Thankfully his teacher just chalked it up to relief that he wouldnât have to stand up and present when his stomach was healing from the surgery.
Coach Wymack and Abby wouldnât even let him go to the Court. Kevin had tried to argue quite a few times on Sunday when that decision had been made. Argued that he could sit in and watch for strategy purposes if nothing else.
However, even Kevin couldnât guarantee that FF wouldnât get accidentally run into / knocked against considering his complete lack of presence.
Matt had rushed into Abbyâs house having made a bee-line for it upon reaching the airport. Â âSmiths! You got stabbed!â Matt yelled as if informing him of his own predicament.
âYeah.â FF agreed as if it were something that could have been debated.
âWhat happened?! Nicky just sent a pic of the flowers he got you and the card?â Matt had asked pulling his backpack off his shoulder and to his front as he unzipped it and rooted around for something before pulling out an orange envelope. âThis is from me and Dan, you remember her right?â Matt had asked.
FF thought of quiet conversations he has overheard over the phone and not so quiet noises Matt makes when engaging in some phone sex with his girlfriend.
âYes, I remember Dan.â Â FF had said diplomatically and accepted the card.
The card was sitting on the nightstand at Abbyâs house next to the card the Monsters, his grandma, other teammates, and some cards from friends he had made outside of Exy. It feels nice to look at the multiple cards all wishing him well.
His Grandma was going to stay for two weeks and Abby was being incredibly kind to put them up
He spent most of that week sleeping, spending time with his grandma, getting yelled at by Abby for trying to do chores, and spending time with the Foxes that came to visit him.
Nicky had come over to hang out every day without fail. Most of the upperclassmen who were on the original âmiracleâ team of the Foxes stopped in to see him regularly. Even Jack stopped in to complain about how Captain Neil presented a danger to the rest of them before giving him a Get Well Soon card and leaving.
It was a strangely thoughtful card that heâs near positive Jackâs girlfriend picked out for him. When the end of the week and the first game that FF would need to sit out from approached Coach Wymack asked if he wanted to come.
âYou canât play, but youâre still a Fox.â Wymack had said and his grandma had encouraged him to go and spend time with his friends. Sheâd hold down the fort for Abby, cook up a bunch of food for the the team to enjoy when they got back late.
So FF climbed onto the bus and sat next to Nicky who had declared himself FFâs bodyguard for the evening whoâs safety he would only pass off to Coach Wymack during the game proper.
***
Theyâve come so damn far from the worst team in the Division. His kids are thriving and because of that heâs gotten a larger budget. A larger budget to better help his kids with. David would be lying if he said he didnât spend some nights wishing he could tell himself of a few years ago just how good it would get.
Still, the match is a lot closer than it should be.
He looks to his side and sees FF sitting there watching the game with rapt attention.
He looks as Sheena fumbles a pass that his newest problem child had mastered the timing of a month before. He sees Kevinâs shoulders go up in anger but Neilâs quick reflexes save it before the play is fully fumbled.
Neil makes a feint to pass to Kevin and the goal lights up putting them in the lead by 2 goals. David thinks of the numerous plays that would have gone smoother with the kid next to him playing instead of Sheena but there was no point in wishing for things that couldnât be.
FF wouldnât be playing until the Spring Championships started up and David would need to address FFâs medical hiatus and Lisaâs âfamily emergencyâ that had her leaving the team.
It always stung when a Fox left but it hurt less when it was of their own volition instead of in a body bag.
He looks to the side again and thinks of the numerous decisions he had needed to make as Kevin slept in the car on the way to the hospital. Honestly, if he still was thinking about going after the hospital.
How the fuck did the hospital just leave the damn kid in a hallway for over an hour? He hates the thought of FF laying there in pain and bleeding watching as people went by.
Heâs grateful that the kid didnât seem to remember it.
He wasnât going to mention it to any of the other Foxes, not even FF if he could swing it. He has no doubt that at the very least Andrew and Neil would go on a rampage and heâs near positive that Kevin would take special delight in it considering a week on he was still bitching about what he had seen in the Nutritionist office.
Heâs not sure what Nicky would do but he knows itâd give him a headache.
Nicky takes a hard hit that has him subbed out for one of the freshman backliners. Nickyâs a little woozy and Abby confirms a very slight concussion that sheâll keep an eye on during the trip back.
They win by slimmer margins than they should but itâs to be expected.
âCoach Wymack?â FF asks.
âWhatâs up?â David asks.
âIâm going to go to the bathroom. It...uh...well it takes a while now.â FF says and David can read the embarrassment.
âMeet us at the bus. Be careful.â he orders.
FF nods and heads off.
Neil and Matt are on press duty and David preps the press to let them know about FF and Lisa. There are some questions about what kind of medical hiatus but David declined to answer knowing that Neil and Matt wouldnât let it slip either.
His last two players get showered and on the bus.
He does a count and gets the correct number and starts the bus.
Theyâre just about to get on the highway when thereâs a shout, âWait! Whereâs Smithy?!â Nicky exclaims full volume over the general conversation that had been going on throughout the bus.
David frowns, he had counted-
Abby. He had counted Abbyâs head next to Nicky.
âOh god dammit.â he says.
***
FF looked at where the bus should have been waiting for him.
He closes his eyes and hopes that the bus will appear between blinks.Â
He opens his eyes again and finds...nope just fans milling about heading to their own cars and home. He gives a hopeful look across the parking lot wondering if the bus maybe just got moved back somewhere so that they could get out easier after he went and made them wait?
A lot of people. Some kids. Some disappointed Belmonte fans. Some excited Fox fans. Some general Exy fanatics who were discussing what the Belmonte team would need to do to stay in  for the Spring Championships.
No Palmetto State Fox team bus.
He swallows a bit of disappointment and moves past it.
He pulled up his phone to plug in Abbyâs house and saw that it would be a 4 day hike from Belmonte. He looked down at his shoes contemplating if theyâd make the over 300 miles of walking. The doctors and Abby had been very clear not to do too much exercise but surely it wouldnât count since he was just going to walk? They said walking was fine right?
FF sighed at the thought.
Yeah, it wasnât going to work.
His stomach hurts at the thought of a 5 hour car ride. Maybe there was a bus station nearby and he could make his way back via greyhound.
He was looking at his phone again when it started to ring and Nickyâs face was on his screen to let him know who the caller was.
He hit the answer button, âHello-â
There was an inhale and FF had been on the receiving end of this quite a few times at this point so he held his phone the entire length of his arm away from his ear, âSMITHY, ARE YOU ON THE BUS OR DID WE FORGET YOU?!â Nicky screeches and it hurts his ears even from an entire arms length away. He wonders how in the world Nicky can stand being that loud with his minor concussion.
He stares at his phone dubiously for a few moments, worried that Nicky may shout again.
âSmithy?! Smithy?â He hears Nickyâs not quite as loud but very concerned voice. FF decides to bite the bullet.
âHello Nicky, I am not on the bus.â He says.
âWe fucking LEFT SMITHY!â Nicky yells and FF can hear a collective groan from across the line.
He may even hear Coach Wymack yelling something about âagainâ and feels shame burn in his stomach. He should have just held in his pee. He hadnât really needed to go that badly and itâs not like Coach Wymack doesnât take bathroom breaks.
âItâs okay.â He rushes to assure Nicky. âI canâŚgrab a bus or something. You donât need to come back, Iâm-â
âYoung man, if you say that youâre fine I can not be held responsible for what I will do when I see you in the next 20 minutes.â Nicky threatens. âI also canât be held responsible for what Iâll do to Neil since I feel like heâs infected you somehow.â He says.
He hears a distant âHeyâ followed by an even more distant âMan, I hate to say it but I think heâs right.â
âI donât want to bother you.â He says.
âSmithy, you are so far from a bother it is insane. How about I stay on the line with you okay?â Nicky asks but something has caught his eye.
Two kids havenât moved as the rest of the world continued to. He watched as they clung to one another and no one seemed to take notice of them. He doesnât understand how anyone could miss them with the bright orange childrenâs jerseys they had on. One sporting 01 - Josten and the other 10 - Josten on the backs.
âThatâs okay Nicky. Call me when youâre close.â He says and makes his way over.
He can see the little boyâs hand holding the little girlâs hand tightly and is careful to walk around them in a way so that he wouldnât appear out of nowhere. âHey,â he squatted down to their height and the little boy still jumped slightly, dropping a small book to the ground, and the little girl hid her face in his shoulder. âSorry, I didnât mean to startle you. I just noticed you looked a little lost.â He says and his muscles wonât pull in a way to offer a reassuring smile but he hopes he can convey it through his tone.
The little boy visibly swallows down nervous spit, âIâm not supposed to talk to strangers.â He says holding on tighter to the little girl.
âSmart, continue to do that.â He says immediately, âCan you just nod yes or no for me?â He asks instead.
The boy thinks for a long moment before nodding affirmatively.
âGreat, good job.â He says, âDid you come to the stadium with your parents?â He asks
A nod in the affirmative.
âDo your parents know where you are?â He asks.
He shakes his head in a negative.
âAre you lost?â He asks.
Another negative.
âSo you mean to be right here?â Â He wants to clarify.
A nod in the affirmative this time.
FF takes a moment to piece together what he knows and looks down at the book.
An autograph book. âOh, you wanted to get an autograph from Captain Neil?â he asks.
The little boy looks up but itâs the little girl who answers. She finally takes her face out from his shoulder. FFâs eyes canât help but see the large burn scar on her cheek but also see how her eyes sparkle with delight, âYou know Captain Josten?!â she exclaims in delight.
âMillie!â The young boy says. âHeâs a stranger!â he hisses.
âNu-uh!â she shakes her head, âNumber 13!â she points at his jersey he had worn in solidarity. âHe passes to Captain Josten!â she says brightly. âSee Brandon?â she smiles.
It could just be a fan jersey though FF highly doubts that anyone would buy fan merch for him. He is no Kevin Day, Captain Neil Josten, or Andrew Minyard.
Still the little boy, Brandon, looks at him with wide eyes, âYouâre Smith?â he asks.
âYeah.â FF nods, âCaptain Neil is my Captain.â he says.
âI love Captain Josten! I wanna marry him!â Millie says and FF canât help but wonder if Andrew would squash such adorable competition. âHis face is like mine!â she giggles.
âYeah, your face is as cool as Captain Neilâs is.â FF agrees with completely sincerity.
âWe came out here to get Captain Jostenâs signatureâ Brandon says with a pout, âAll the adults were in the way and it was...kind of scary.â he admits with a flush.
A thought occurs to him. He doesnât want to leave these kids and brave the crowds to find someone to announce the lost kids. It would only be about 12 more minutes before the bus comes. Coach Wymack would be able to help and...
âTheyâre coming to pick me up pretty soon. How about we stay right here and we can get Captain Neilâs autograph together?â he asks.
Both kids light up at the idea. âReally?â they both ask.
âYeah, I also want Captain Neilâs autograph.â he says because he does. Heâs wanted Captain Neilâs autograph for AGES but had been too awkward to ask. Then Greg had come and made it seem like FF would want it just to sell it or something.
Now he has the perfect excuse.
***
David pulled into the spot he had left almost half an hour ago and barely managed to put the bus into park before most of his more senior players were prying the door open to go look for FF.
Nicky had called but FF hadnât picked up and it had set his more paranoid playersâ teeth on edge.
The only one that stayed on the bus was Nicky since Abby had a firm grip on him.
David sighed and told everyone else to stay put before exiting the bus and began the herculean effort of trying to spot FF in a crowd.
It actually wasnât too hard as he found his players standing and watching as FF crouched with his back to them as two little kids in orange Fox jerseys were re-enacting something for him.
Heâd be tempted to let them keep going if he didnât remember Abbyâs list of specific things FF shouldnât do with his still healing stomach and squatting like that was definitely on the list.
âSmith.â he says and watches as the Freshman jolts and tips over, thankfully onto his side, from his squatted position.
The kids get nervous when they see him but then their eyes both lock on Neilâs face. For a moment his heart aches for his player, plenty of kids have cried about Neilâs scars but then his eyes land on the little girlâs face more properly and...
Oh...
Those are stars in her eyes. David looks at the two different Josten kids jerseys that the Palmetto store had released.
FF recovers from his tumble admirably, âCoach Wymack,â he says getting up onto his feet. âThese two are lost, can you see if thereâs a way to contact their parents?â he asks.
David nods and pulls out his phone and steps away slightly.
He watches over the interaction that happens next.
**
As promised, FF had taken the awkward lead of asking for it and had them form a line. It had been weird but he watched as understanding dawned in Captain Neilâs eyes as he saw the two Josten jerseys. It had felt even less weird to get Captain Neilâs autograph when Matt had jokingly gotten in line behind Brandon because he too wanted Captain Neilâs autograph.
FF felt a little bad that Captain Neil had been so flustered by the requests but at least he finally had the Captain Neil autograph heâd wanted since last March. It also felt nice when Captain Neil had smiled the way he did at Millie when she babbled about how they matched.
Andrew had bumped into him in the way that FF was learning meant that he was pleased with whatever FF had just done. Kevin and Aaron had been the ones to ask if his stitches were okay after his startled tumble.
Millie and Brandonâs parents were incredibly grateful and swore to continue to be lifelong fans of the Foxes. Millie and Brandon themselves had been more excited about their Captain Neil Josten autographs than being reunited with their parents. They had waved goodbye with Millie loudly proclaiming that her and Captain Neil would get married someday.
Climbing onto the bus he was subjected to a check over by Abby when both Kevin and Aaron dragged him to her. Then he was sat down next to Nicky who shoved him into the window seat and cuddled up. âI wonât lose track of you if Iâm on you.â was his logic.
The bus ride resumed.
âI didnât know you liked kids.â Nicky says head on FFâs shoulder. âIâve watched you go to the other side of the street to avoid middle school kids.â he adds.
FF feels ice in his stomach.
âMiddle school kids are mean.â FF says and doesnât properly answer the question but Nicky is just concussed enough to not call him on it.
MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU
NEXT
Like I said in my last part I will be tagging people separate from the actual update going forward. Still any requests to be added to the tag list feel free to put in the replies here.
#Fluent Freshman AU#Nicky was getting ready to call any and all local dairy farmers#to start the 'have you seen me?' campaign#Nicky was also trying to figure out how to tell Aras that he lost her entire grandson#He may have been freaking out in the bus with Abby#'I'm gonna lose GRANDSON PRIVILEGES ALL OVER AGAIN#Thankfully FF wasn't far and now Nicky knows to just truly superglue himself to FF. Buddy system for life#Yeah so you may have caught it in the previous bit#part 27#Andrew and Neil's concern about FF getting forgotten in a hallway did actually happen#and FF passed out there#Only Wymack's call for an update galvanized them to find him and start helping him#The Foxes get back and GS has a bunch of Tupperwear#full of delicious food for them since it's so late#Nicky and Matt are halfway through getting her a custom 'Foxy Grandma' Jersey#She's discovered quite a bit more knitting to be done for FF's friends#That sweet boy Matt deserves a knitted present too#Maybe even that brash young man Jack should get in on the GS knitted presents train#Well now it's out there in the world that FF is on a medical Hiatus#I'm sure nothing will happen#this is a lie I know the chain of events that are to follow#AFTG#AFTG AU#AFTG OC#Andreil#FF - Part 32
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The Iliad, colourised
thank you @a-system-of-nerds for inspiring me to make this-
#the iliad#helen of troy#hector of troy#paris of troy#the odyssey#the trojan war#greek mythology#menelaus#agamemnon#I know close to nothing about the iliad#thankfully @a-system-of-nerds has been explaining it to me#this is what I'm getting from it so far
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"It is too easy to dismiss [Leonor of Navarre] as an overambitious schemer who would do anything to obtain a crown, shedding the blood of her own siblings and her subjects in order to attain the throne. However, a deeper investigation of her long lieutenancy and ephemeral reign shows a woman who fought tenaciously to preserve her place but also worked tirelessly to administer a realm which was crippled by internal conflict and the center of the political schemes of France, Aragon, and Castile. She tried to broker peace, fight off those who opposed her, repair the wounds caused by conflict, protect the sovereignty of the realm, and keep the wheels of governance turning. Leonor was not always successful in achieving all of these aims but given the background of conflict and the lack of cooperation she received from all of her family members, bar her loyal husband, it is a huge achievement that she survived to wear the crown at all. Many writers have argued that Leonor deserved the troubled lieutenancy, personal tragedies, an ephemeral reign, and a blackened reputation, basing their assumption that she committed a crime that cannot be [conclusively] proven. However, a more fitting description of her would be that of a resolute ruler who successfully overcame a multitude of challenges in order to survive in a difficult political landscape and gain a hard-fought throne.â
-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor of Navarre: The Price of Ambition", Queenship, Gender and Reputation in the Medieval and Early Modern West, 1060-1600 (Edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz)
#historicwomendaily#leonor of navarre#15th century#Navarrese history#my post#I mean...the crime can't be explicitly 'proven' but Leonor DID have the means motive and opportunity; she had the most to gain;#the timing was incredibly convenient for her; and most contemporaries believed she was responsible.#She *did* ultimately act against her brother [Carlos] and sister [Blanca]#Though of course the fact remains that:#1) The final responsibility lies with Juan the Faithless: he was the King; the one in power; and the one who rejected Navarre's succession#Blanca herself - while criticizing Leonor and Gaston - placed the ultimate blame on their father as her 'principal...destructor'#All three siblings were reacting to an unconventional disruption in the system caused by Juan & their actions should be judged accordingly.#2) I am hesitant to believe accusations of 'poison' as a cause of murder given how that was commonly used to slander controversial women#and given how it contributed to the dichotomy of Blanca as a tragic beautiful heroine and Leonor as her scheming ambitious sister#3) Even if Leonor DID commit the crime (imo she was at the very least complicit in it) she is still worthy of a reassessment.#I don't think it's fair for it to define her entire identity#Because it certainly did not define her life - she lived for decades before and would live for decades after#It was on the whole one of the many series of obstacles and challenges she had to face before she succeeded in ascending the throne.#The fact that she died so soon after IS ironic but it is in equal parts tragic. And we don't know what Leonor herself felt about it:#Did she think it was a hollow victory? Or did she feel nothing but satisfaction that she died as the Queen of Navarre? We'll never know.#Whatever the case: given her circumstances the fact that she survived to wear the crown itself was an achievement#It's funny because Woodacre parallels Leonor to Richard III in terms of 'blackened' reputations for 'unproven' (...sure) crimes#(thankfully she admits Richard has been long-rehabilitated; what she doesn't bring herself to admit is that he's now over-glorified)#But I don't think this parallel works at all for the exact reasons she uses to try and reassess Leonor#Namely: Richard was the one in power. He was the King. The ultimate blame for what happened to his nephews was his own.#and moreover: Richard's actions against the Princes DID define his reign and were exactly what provoked opposition to his rule.#Any so-called 'rehabilitation' that doesn't recognize and emphasize this is worthless#also if we want to get specific: the Princes were literal children who did nothing and were deposed in times of peace.#Carlos and Blanca were adults with agency and armies and Leonor's actions against them took place in the middle of a civil war#So ultimately I think Leonor's case is fundamentally very different and I don't think her comparison holds well at all
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Having Tomadachi Life with yourself and your F/Os is all fun and games until it says they don't like you/you have to watch them get hearts over someone else
Uuuhhhh I vent/rant/lose my marbles in the tags just as a heads up. Nothing HEAVY just. Very bothersome
#okay i can normally ignore the they dont like me thing. if anything i giggle a little over it and move on#i gotta be like having a rough moment for that to bug or bother me#and i PURPOSELY made an island with only boys cause most my F/Os are boys and if i only do one gender then-#-I dont have to worry about them asking anyone else out cause Nintendo is/was scare of same-gender relationships#But i wanted to unlock the park and cafe and amusement park but you only unlock those if someone confesses their feelings#so i purposely made two random default Miis and then prayed that they liked each other and hopefully ask each other out#which thankfully they both like each other so far and im still hoping. knock on wood.#but i made ONE MISTAKE and accidentally told the girl one to go be friends with Jackson IT WAS AN ACCIDENT#and i thought nothing of it because she didn't really like him but nooOOOOO FOR SOME REASON HE DECIDED TO LIKE-LIKE HER#I almost soft reset my game and I wouldve too if he didnt decide to have the heart problem for it until after i finished all my-#-daily stuff and answering other problems and things#so i just shut it down really fast. I considered just ignoring it until the problem went away nathrally but I didnt want it to come up again#ugh. Im not like. devestated or anything over it but eating my own faults SUCKS#If it was the reverse then it would be a different story but. ugh. I mean i still wouldve shut it down cause i dont need them-#-being a couple especially cause then i really wouldve lost it#I just had to get that out of my system im all good nowđŽâđ¨đ
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life is so funny sometimes
#just got fired because my vibes are off#like that's literally it my boss told me i did nothing wrong and my work is good ut the rest of the team just doesn't really like me#and doesn't feel like i fit in#i mean I've only been there for almost three months and I've noticed that I don't really vibe with the others#no matter how hard i tried#but I didn't know you could get fired for that#honestly i'm kind of relieved because i'm pretty sure my old job will take me back#but goddamn what a blow to my ego#it's like i'm back in highschool trying to not be the weird girl#but thankfully i have a strong support system and i know at the end of the day it has nothing to do with me#man#what a day#girlblogging
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Language is a physical thing in the brain (kinda) so if you learn a new language the whole system should know it! Although some of them might think they do not, just like in some systems an alter might believe they are speaking a language the body doesnât know when really theyâre kinda speaking gibberish
I hope it is a physical thing, itâd be a little rude to be in Japan and one day speak English exclusively after achieving fluency
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my pc is built!!! finally!!!!
spent all day putting the thing together and now I gotta figure out how to install windows ;w;
that's a problem for tomorrow
#baby bat unmuted#i did run into 2 issues when putting everything together tho#it was going so smoothly until i plugged the pc into the wall and nothing turned on#turned out one of those tiny plugs on the motherboard was slightly off one pin#thank goodness it was an easy fix#and then my monitor wouldn't display anything lol#thankfully all i had to do was restart the pc and it worked#and then of course setting up the actual operating system was the one step i haven't bothered researching#i need a usb drive with a lot of memory#only one I've got is 2gb lol#i should probably ask my brother for help now for these steps#aaaah i just wanna play games already
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Crawling back to you
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Simmons!Reader Summary: You never planned on having a casual fling with your brother's friend five years ago, nor did you expect him to fall in love with you, which forced you to end things abruptly. But now he's unexpectedly back in your lifeâolder, wiser, and fully intent on winning your heart. Content: (18+) >12k words, reader has commitment issues, heâs the softest softdom iâve ever written, female oral, fingering, unprotected p in v, a little squirting? teeth rotting fluff and a chaotic ending because who am i without my crack humor A/n: This is for @imagining-in-the-margins FWB writing challenge and somewhat a celebration post for 7k milestone. Idk how that happened but tysm :( I hope you like this as much as I did writing it because matt simmons is so underrated??? Iâm also freaking nervous with this i havenât posted a new fic in a while so please please please be nice i feel like throwing up
Surprise has a way of stopping time. Although you're not sure you can call it that. What youâre experiencing is more than just surprise, itâs the kind of feeling that makes you freeze in place. Itâs not just a jolt to the systemâitâs a full-body takeover. Your breath catches, your heart skips, and your thoughts scatter like leaves caught in the wind. How could they not, when the last person you expected to see is standing right in front of you, clad in the most questionable clothes?
You almost laugh at how absurd he looks. Heâs wearing an oversized hoodie with a tacky âWashington D.C.â print sprawled across the front. Itâs baffling why heâs draped in that shapeless thing over his freakishly tall frame, but itâs too hard to focus on something so trivial when youâre still grasping with the reality of seeing him again. You really canât believe it. Spencer Reid is here. The Spencer Reid.
The guy whose heart you broke five years ago.
You should have seen this coming. In fact, you kind of did, when your brotherâs friends came rushing into the hospital room, their voices a chorus of âoohsâ and âaahsâ as they crowded around the newborn cradled in Kristyâs arms. You exchanged polite greetings when they noticed youâPenelope even pulled you into a tight hug, gushing about how amazing you lookedâand thankfully, there was no sign of him.
But youâd almost allowed yourself to believe he wouldnât show up. When the small space became overly crowded, you stepped out into the waiting room to catch your breath⌠only to find him standing a few feet away with JJ.
And just like that, all the air seems to vanish from your lungs.
You had a plan, of course. In the back of your mind, you always knew a chance meeting was inevitable, whether you liked it or not. And that plan was simple. Youâd offer him a polite smile. Exchange a few words, nothing too personal. Youâd be friendly but distant, always make sure to keep the kind of composure that says youâve moved on, and that the past is just that: the past.
But those well-laid plans seem fragile now, almost naive as you suddenly caught his smile. Now how do you stick to a script when your heart is starting to rewrite all the lines? Or blur the lines specifically, when the past and present merge so seamlessly that youâre reminded of the first time that same smile had charmed you.
Youâre suddenly thrown back to that day five years ago, when your brother had thrown a barbecue cookout to celebrate some joint investigation his team had wrapped up. You didnât know the detailsâdidnât really care to, if you were honestâbut Matt had called you and insisted that you join him.
You hadn't thought much of it at the time. It sounded like another family gathering with a few new faces. But that was the day you met Spencer, and what began as a simple introduction quickly spiraled into something much more complicated. Really complicated. Because as charmed as you were by his smile, he had wanted something more from you when all you could offer him was your body.
So you ran away.
Although not very far, because apparently, heâs standing a few steps away from you, five years later. And the worst part? Heâs now very much aware that youâre here. You watch as his jaw slacks open as he takes a double-take. Youâre rooted in place. JJ, on the other hand, tugs his sleeve as she notices his demeanor slowly shutting down. She turns around to see whatâs caught his attention, and when she spots you, a huge smile spreads across her face.
"Hey! You're here!â You force yourself to look away from him as she moves forward. You reciprocate the hug she throws at you. "How are you?â
Youâre not entirely sure how to answer. How do you even explain that your heart just did a triple backflip and landed somewhere near your stomach? Or that youâre seconds away from having an internal existential crisis because, of course, the universe would choose this moment to throw Spencer Reid back into your life?
There's really no good way to sum that up. So instead, you plaster on a smile that probably looks more like a grimace and reply, "Good. Iâm good.â
JJ doesnât seem to notice the strained edges in your voice. âItâs so nice to see you again! How long has it been?â
Thereâs a moment of silence as you try to gather your thoughts. But before you can respond, Spencerâs voice suddenly cuts through the quiet. Itâs soft, almost hesitant, as if heâs been holding onto this detail for far too long, but every syllable rings in your ears.
"Five years," he says. "Five years, three months, and seventeen days."
Your stomach does another flip. JJ raises her brows, her eyes darting between you and him. You carefully meet her gaze. "Actually, you and I met up last year.â
âOh, right!â She exclaims, her face lighting up as the memory clicks into place. âYou were in town for a conference, right? I totally forgot about that.â
âYou were in town last year and you didnât tell me?â
God, heâs making it terribly hard for you to keep your composure. You throw him a sidelong glance. âI didnât know you wanted to see me.â
His expression shifts slightly, a flicker of something unreadable crossing his face. He looks at you as if your words sounds ludicrous to him.
âI always want to see you.â
You can't decide what surprises you more, the fact that he still wants to see you after all these years, or how easily he says it. The words roll off his tongue so casually, so effortlessly, as if the weight of your shared past doesnât cling to them. And to make matters worse, he's saying this right in front of JJ, who is now staring at him, clearly scrutinizing the significance behind his words.
You quickly shift your attention to her, forcing another smile. "So, are you going to head inside?"
JJ blinks at you. âOh, yeah, I probably should.â She turns to Spencer and gives him a quick but knowing glance. "See you on Monday, Spence."
You glance at him. âYou're not going to see the baby?"
"Spencerâs got something he needs to take care of,â JJ chimes in. Thereâs a slight edge to her voice, like she knows exactly what that âsomethingâ is, but she doesnât elaborate. She gives him one last look before heading inside.
You catch yourself looking up at him again. âYouâre leaving?â
Spencer pauses, studying you carefully, his brow furrowing just slightly like heâs trying to read between the lines of your question.
âI was,â he says softly.
Thereâs a sudden tightness in your chest. âRight.â
âBut now I donât want to.â
There it goes again, the butterflies in your stomach. This is exactly why you didnât want to see him. You knew that once you looked into his eyes, heard his voice, it would stir up everything youâve spent five years trying to bury. Youâd told yourself it was better to pretend that whatever happened between you was nothing more than a stupid choice. But now, standing here with him so close, you can feel all those walls you built crumbling down with just a few words.
You finally look at him, like really look at him. Itâs impossible not to notice how heâs changed over the past five years. There are faint lines around his eyes now, signs of age that wasn't there before. His hair is longer, a little messier. It curls around his ears in a way that makes him look almost boyish, yet undeniably charming which suits him more than you'd like to admit.
But even with all the changes, his smileâgentle and just a little shyâremains the same. That smile reminds you of a time when things were simpler, where it was enough to convince you that you didn't have to keep your guard up all the time. But then you remember the reason you walked away, and his smile becomes a little harder to look at.
Because while he's changed, grown, matured, so have you, and you're not sure if there's room for the person you are now in the space that once belonged to both of you.
His eyes scan you in the same way youâre assessing him. âYou look good.â
Your mouth twitches at his words. You didnât expect him to be so straightforward. âThank you.â
âYouâre even prettier than I remember.â
The sigh you let out is long and weary. He really knows how to push your buttons.
âSpencer. Donât.â
âWhat?â
âYou canât just say things like that afterââ You hesitate, crossing your arms. "After everything. What happened to 'Hi, how are you?â. Or maybe something simple like âWhat have you been up to? Anything new?ââ
He blinks, clearly taken aback by your abruptness. âOkay. Hi, how are you?â
You cast him a wary glance. âGood.â
"What have you been up to?"
"Work."
"Anything new?"
"No."
He pauses again, his eyes searching yours before he asks, "No new boyfriend?"
You frown. âHuh?â
âGirlfriend?â
"Spencer."
"Are you seeing anyone?"
"Spencer."
He smiles sheepishly, his shoulders sagging slightly. "You're right, that was inappropriate. I didn't think I would see you again, itâs throwing me off a bit."
âYou didnât think I would be here for my newborn niece?â
His smile turns into a grimace. "I guess I wasn't thinking clearly." He shifts on his feet, fidgeting with his fingersâa small, familiar tic that you hadnât seen in years. âIâm sorry. I didnât mean to make things weird.â
âItâs fine,â you reply, though thereâs no real bite to your words. His nervous energy is making it hard to stay annoyed. Your eyes narrow on his oversized hoodie again, the casual, almost careless choice that seems slightly out of character for the Spencer you remember.
He seems to notice you staring so blatantly. âWhat?â
âYou look funny.â
A hint of surprise flashes across his face. âYou think Iâm funny?â
âDifferent,â you correct. âDid you raid someoneâs closet on your way here or something?â
"Oh⌠I had to change my clothes. I got wet at the park earlier.â
You glance towards the window with a frown. "It's not even raining."
"I ran through the sprinklers."
The cease on your forehead deepens. Even that sounds so unlike him. Spencer Reid doing something that carefree in public?
âYou ran through the sprinklers? Alone?"
You notice his expression shift as the question leaves your lips, something very subtle, but youâve known him long enough to catch it. The way his eyes flicker, the slight hesitation before he answers, makes it obvious. Thereâs a hint of something unspoken in the way he looks at you, and suddenly, it all clicks into place.
He wasnât alone.
You look away. It's ridiculous, you think. To feel this somewhat⌠jealous when it should be the last thing on your mind because, really, what right do you have? What you had with him wasnât even a relationship to begin with. But despite all the logic in the world, you canât help the pang in your chest, the twist of something bitter and familiar curling in your gut.
"It's not what you think," he slowly says.
You force a small, awkward laugh, trying to brush it off. "I wasnât assuming anything. Itâs none of my business, anyway."
"No, really, it's nothing like that." he insists, scrunching his nose in the way he does when he's trying to think. "I mean, I did meet someone at the park, but itâs not like⌠what you might be thinking. We were just talking, and⌠and then there were these sprinklers and it wasnât really planned or anything, then sheâwell, technically, we werenât even alone the whole time because there were other people around, and itâs not like weââ
âSpencer, you donât have to explainââ you begin, but then something dawns on you. âWait, is this what JJ was referring to? Did you⌠Did you have plans?â
You notice his Adamâs apple dip as he swallows. "Kind of," he admits. âBut it wasn't anything serious. It was just, you know, a casual thing.â
You can't help the way your stomach knots. Casual could mean anything. Maybe a simple coffee between two friends, or even a lighthearted conversation over lunch. But in your experience, at least in the book you and Spencer had written together in the past, casual had always meant sex. And now, hearing him say it about someone else feels like a punch to the gut you hadn't expected.
You suddenly feel foolish for letting your mind go there, for assuming that whatever he meant by casual was the same thing it had meant for the two of you back then. It's been five years, and so much has changed. Maybe casual means something entirely different for him now, and you're the one stuck in the past, reading into things that no longer hold the same weight.
He must have noticed the slight falter in your expression, the way your eyes momentarily cloud over with something you canât quite hide. He takes a step forward. "Itâs really nothing.â
You take a step back. âEven if it is, itâs really not my business.â
âBut itâs not,â he urges. Heâs suddenly so persistent, and you canât help but feel the embarrassment gnawing you at how easily he can read your mind. It's one thing to wrestle with these feelings privately, but having them so clearly acknowledged makes it all the more humiliating. You canât believe you let yourself get so worked up over something that shouldnât matter this much.
You eye the exit door. âI need to go.â
"Right now?â His brows knit together in confusion. âBut your familyâs here."
Youâve only spent a few minutes with him and youâre already running away.
"I just remembered I have to take care of⌠something."
The excuse sounds weak even to your own ears, but you donât wait for his response. You quickly turn on your heel, and when he calls out your name with concern, you force yourself to keep moving, scurrying off down the hallway.
Me: I'm heading back first Big bro: You okay? Me: Bad headache Big Bro: You didn't eat anything, did you?
You scoff. What is it about your brother always zeroing in on eating whenever you complain about feeling off?
Me: You know I did. Just not much Big Bro: Thatâs what I thought. Thereâs some leftover dinner in the fridge. And check the second drawer in the kitchen, there should be some ibuprofen Me: Yes, Dad Big Bro: Donât get smart with me Me: 𫡠Big Bro: Drink lots of water Me: Yes, sir. Anything else on your mind while youâre giving out parental advice? Big Bro: Iâm just trying to keep myself from dragging you out of my house if you collapse Me: đ Big Bro: The kids are staying with Kristyâs parents, Iâll drop by tomorrow morning Me: Okay Big Bro: Call me if you need anything
You toss your phone down on the bed, then let out the most exasperated sigh. Spending your Saturday night in your brotherâs guest room is the last thing you expect to be doing, let alone faking a headache just to avoid confronting a situationship from the past. You honestly thought youâd outgrown this kind of avoidance, but here you are, slipping back into old habits as if no time has passed at all.
Ironically, your mind stumbles into the past, and you remember a conversation you once had with Spencer. It was during one of those nights when you both were tangled in each otherâs arms. You could faintly remember the conversation started with him talking about his work.
He never actually told you the details of his cases, but he liked to share his thoughts on the different complexities of the human mind. And on that particular night, he was rambling about the psychological concept of avoidance, which he claimed to have detected the first time he spotted the bad guy. He went on at how people often retreat into familiar behaviors to protect themselves from discomfort.
At the time, you had brushed it off with a joke, teasing him about overanalyzing everything when the situation had already played out. But now the irony isnât lost on you. Youâre doing exactly what he once explained. Itâs almost laughable if it didnât sting so much to realize how right he was.
A sharp ding from your phone pulls you out of your thoughts, and one glance at it tells you exactly whoâs messaging. The name on the screen makes your chest tighten, but you donât even give yourself a moment to consider responding. You quickly turn the phone to silent, push yourself off the bed, and head straight for the kitchen. True to your brotherâs words, thereâs leftover pizza in the fridge, but the idea of reheating it doesnât seem appealing to you.
You reach for the bottle of wine instead.
The red liquor tastes like butter, or something close to it. Itâs similar in the way the liquid melts over your tongue, spreading warmth through your chest and settling comfortably in your belly. By the time you're sipping the second glass, you feel more relaxed, but then the sharp sound of the doorbell ringing cuts through the calm.
You glance at the door from the position of the couch. You have a strong feeling about who it is. But as much as you're sure of the who, what really gnaws at you is the why.
You hesitantly make your way toward the door, and sure enough, when you pull it open, Spencer is standing at your brotherâs doorstep. The corner of his lips turns upward in an awkward, almost apologetic half-smile as if heâs unsure of how to begin or whether he should even be there in the first place.
You lean against the doorframe. âDid Matt tell you I was here?â
He gives you a pointed look, his eyebrows raising slightly. âNo, but it wasnât hard to figure out.â You throw him the same questioning look, and he explains, âThis is the only place youâd stay in town because not only do you hate staying alone at a hotel, but Matt wouldnât let you even if you tried.â
You canât believe he still remembers your offhand comment about sterile hotel rooms. Itâs one of the reasons you used to prefer staying at his apartment whenever you were in town.
âWhy are you here anyway?â You ask. âI thought you had plans.â
He pauses for moment as if deciding how much to say. Finally, he clears his throat. âCan I come in? Iâd rather explain it inside.â
"I don't think you owe me any explanations about what you do with your time," you reply, crossing your arms.
"Maybe I don't owe it, but I want to give it.â
âWhich isnât necessary.â
âBut appreciated, I hope.â
You find yourself caught off guard by the sincerity in his voice. You tell yourself not to read too much into it, but there's a part of you that can't help but soften at his words. Maybe it's the way his eyes reminds you of melted chocolate as he stares at you that makes you want to let him in, despite your better judgment.
You pull the door open. âFine, but take your shoes off. Kristyâs very serious about hygiene.â
He does as heâs told and tucks away his shoes on the rack by the door.
âDo you want anything to drink?â
He shakes his head slightly, offering a small smile. "I'm good, thanks."
You nod and gesture toward the living room. He follows you, and as you both approach the couch, he instinctively moves to the far end, settling down cautiously as if not wanting to invade your space. You take a seat on the opposite end.
âSo, what do you want to talk about?â
He leans back slightly, resting his hands on his knees. You can tell he's trying to gauge your mood, figure out how much to push and when to hold back. "Do you remember when we went on that date at the street fair?"
You frown, remembering how you had missed your bus home in one of your trips here and ended up wandering at the fair with him. âThat wasnât a date.â
"Fine. Do you remember when we went to the street fair together not on a date?"
âI remember."
His shoulders relax a bit at your response. âYou spent ages deciding what to eat and you ended up choosing that little Korean stall in the corner. We had to walk a bit further to get there even when your shoes were hurting you.â
You think back, internally scolding yourself for wearing those damn boots that day. âYou thought I was being ridiculous.â
"I didn't think it was ridiculous. I just didn't get it at first. Your feet were practically covered in blisters."
"I really wanted kimchi."
"I could tell, and it took me a while to understand why you went through all that trouble. Now I do.â
You glance at him, sensing there's more behind his words. âWhy are you bringing this up?"
He meets your gaze. His brown eyes looking a little more golden underneath the dim light. "I guess this is me choosing.â
âThat youâre craving for Korean?â
He gives a soft, genuine laugh, the kind that starts in his chest and reaches his eyes, making them crinkle at the corners. âNot exactly,â he says and leans a little closer. âWhat Iâm trying to say is, thatâs how I feel right now. I'm here because I want to be, not because it's convenient, but because itâs you.â
Thereâs a subtle flutter in your chest, and your skin prickles with a familiar warmth as he speaks. Your heart beats a little faster, not enough to be alarming, but just enough to remind you that youâre not as unaffected as you pretend to be. You can feel your palms start to sweat, and thereâs that almost imperceptible hitch in your breathing that you hope he doesnât notice.
âSpencerâŚâ You donât even know how to start. âItâs been five years."
He nods slowly. âI know.â
âNo, I donât think you do. A lot of has changed since the last time we saw each another, and youâre here acting like we both separated on good terms? Don't you hate me?â
His brow furrows slightly. âWhy would I hate you?â
âBecause I broke your heart. Iâ" Your voice falters as you struggle to find the right words. "The moment you told me you were falling in love with me, I... I ran. I couldnât handle it. I pushed you away like a coward.â
âYou weren't a coward, you were scared. And maybe I didnât understand that back then, but I do now.â
You shake your head. âBut I hurt you.â
The sigh he lets out is heavy, yet there's something deceptively calm about it, almost as if heâs already made peace with the past. âYou did what you thought you had to do, and sure, it hurt. But Iâve had a lot of time to think about it, and I realized that I donât blame you for needing space. It wasnât about me not being enough, it was about you needing to protect yourself.â
His words start to chip away at the wall youâve built around your heart. âI thought youâd hate me,â you admit quietly.
âI could never hate you."
You lower your gaze, your fingers fiddling nervously with the edge of the cushion. âAlright, letâs say you choose me. Now what? What is it that you want?â
He pauses for a moment, his fingers curled into his palms. He looks away briefly, taking a deep breath as if gathering his thoughts, then returns his gaze to you. âI want another chance.â
If you were surprised to see him at the hospital earlier, this is something entirely different. Thereâs something akin to panic fluttering in your chest. Itâs amusing, really, how the human body reacts before the mind fully comprehends as if your heart knows whatâs coming before you do. You can feel it in the way your breath catches, in the way your stomach knots with a nervous energy you canât quite shake. Because how do you even react to that?
You finally turn to face him, leaning your head against the back of the couch. This moment feels like some sort of dĂŠjĂ vu, and just like the last time, your mind is already bracing itself, preparing to give him the same answer you did back then.
âYou know itâs never going to work.â
He mirrors you, but instead of the frustration or sadness you half-expected, thereâs a gentle smile on his lips. âYou sound so sure.â
âThatâs because I am,â you reply. âI know what youâre asking for right now, and we donât function like that. Not in the past, at least.â
âHow did we function?â
âBased on sex.â
âAnd what do you think Iâm asking for now?â
âMore than sex, which isnât going to work."
âWhy not?â
âBecauseââ you start, but the words catch in your throat. Youâre not even sure how to explain. The fears, the doubts, the past... all of it feels too big, too overwhelming to articulate in a way that makes sense.
âBecause the idea still terrifies you?â
You frown, caught off guard by the directness of his question. âNo.â
The smile stretches even more across his face. âThen give me one good reason why you think so.â
"Oh I can name a few."
He studies you, his eyes narrowing slightly as if heâs trying to read every thought racing through your mind. âLetâs make a deal then. You give me those reasons why we canât work, and Iâll give you reasons why we can.â
Youâre quiet for a moment, considering his offer. Itâs bold, almost reckless, and yet... thereâs something in his eyes that makes you want to accept the challenge.
"And if your reasons arenât good enough?"
âThen weâll deal with that when we come to it,â he replies softly. âBut Iâm willing to bet we wonât have to.â
"You really think you can convince me?"
"I can try." He leans a little closer, just enough for you to feel the warmth radiating from his body. "So, whatâs your first reason?"
Thatâs too easy, too obvious. âYouâre one of my brotherâs closest friends,â you point out. âWhat happens if this doesnât work out? I donât want to put him, or us, in that position.â
He doesnât miss a beat. âThat didnât stop us in the past.â
You scoff. âSpencer, we were sneaking around behind his back. Itâs not exactly the same thing. This⌠whatever this is, it would be out in the open, and thatâs a whole different level of complicated.â
âIt would be different, yes. But that doesnât mean it has to be a problem. If anything, it shows how serious we were then, and how serious we could be now.â You scrunch your nose at his response. âNow whatâs next on your list?â
"Uhh.. the distance! Youâre in D.C., and Iâm not. Itâs not like I can just drop everything and move closer.â
He raises an eyebrow. âYouâre a three-hour drive away, maybe two if I take the expressway. And honestly, with how much we both travel for work, I donât see how thatâs an issue.â
His reasoning is so undeniably logical you feel a flicker of annoyance, not at him, but at how easily heâs dismantling your arguments.
âYou didnât even want to visit me back then.â
"You were the one who didn't want me to. You kept saying it was easier for you to come here.â
His words hit harder than you expect. You remember all the times you insisted on making the trips yourself. You'd convinced yourself it was about convenience, but with him calling you out on it, you realize it wasn't about convenience at all. It was about keeping things on your terms, maintaining a safe distance even when that distance wasn't physical.
"Well, I had more flexible hours," you claim. The excuse is flimsy, and the way Spencer looks at youâpatient, but not fooledâmakes it clear that he sees right through it.
You try to think of your next reason, although the words seem to get stuck before they even form. You know you can easily rattle off more excuses, but something about the way heâs looking at you makes it harder than it should be.
âThatâs it? Youâve only thought of two? I was expecting a bit more of a challenge.â
You scowl at him. "I didnât say I was done."
"Take your time," he comments, leaning back slightly, still wearing that infuriatingly patient smile.
You huff softly, trying to regain your footing. "Okay, how about this? Sex."
There's a beat of silence. "What about sex?"
You feel the words forming, but they sound ridiculous even in your own mind. Still, you force them out of your mouth. Your subconscious is urging you to come up with more excuses to keep him at armâs length. "That was all that we had. What if⌠what if we just fall back into the same patterns?"
âDon't you think that's a reason why we can work? If we were only ever about sex and we're still here, doesn't that show there's something more between us?"
âOr it just means we had a strong physical connection. That doesnât necessarily mean thereâs something more.â
âYou really believe that? That all we had was just physical?â
âYes,â you retort, though the confidence in your voice wavers slightly. Your eyes flicker away for a split second before you meet his gaze again. âThatâs all it ever was and I donât know if it can turn into something youâre trying to imply.â
He lets out a low, amused sound, as the corners of his mouth twitches upward. âYouâre deflecting.â
âIâm being realistic,â you shoot back. âWhat if we try, and it doesnât work? What if everything falls apart because we werenât good at anything but the sex?â
His eyes light up, and suddenly heâs wearing the most boyish grin youâve ever seen on him. âSo you're admitting the sex was good?"
You stop yourself from rolling your eyes.
âYou know what I mean. What we had was...â Wild? Passionate? Crazy-hot-mind-blowing sex? ââŚintense. But intensity isn't enough for a relationship. What if the rest of it doesn't hold up?"
He leans in closer, his hand hovering near yours on the couch.
âBut what if it does?â
All you can do is stare at him.
âYouâre giving me all these reasons to push me away again,â he continues. âBut Iâm here because Iâm not afraid of those doubts. Iâve always wanted to give you more than what we had because you deserve something real. I want us to be real this time, and I think you do too, even if youâre scared to admit it.â
His words are affecting you more than you like to admit. You can slowly feel it in the tension building between you, itâs surprisingly not the uncomfortable kind, but the sort that pulls you in, that makes you want to move closer even though every instinct tells you to stay put.
And then it happens. You feel a slight tremor in your leg, an involuntary movement that causes it to brush against his. The contact is so light it's almost like it didn't happen at all, but it did. He noticesâOf course he doesâand now thereâs a certain gentleness in his gaze like he knows exactly what's going on inside your head. He doesn't push, doesn't rush, just watches you with those impossibly kind eyes.
And in the softest, most careful voice, he asks, âCan I move closer?"
Your heart is pounding now, the rhythm echoing in your ears, in your chest, in the pulse at your throat. The sensation travels downward, a slow, steady beat that moves through your body, inching its way down your spine, tightening in your stomach before it settles low in your abdomen. Itâs a heat that spreads outward until it reaches your core, leaving you acutely aware of every inch of space between you and himâand how much you want to close that distance.
You find yourself nodding. He shifts closer. âCan I touch you?â
You really want to say something witty, something that might deflect from the weight of the situation, but the words wonât come out. You can only manage another nod. He moves slowly, carefully, giving you every opportunity to pull back. But you donât. You canât. Youâre rooted in place as his hand reaches for you.
His palm gently rests on your jaw. Your eyes flutter closed against your consciousness, and the tension thatâs been coiling in your chest slowly unwinds, replaced by a sense of calm. When his thumb slides across your cheek, he speaks again. His voice is so close it's as if the words themselves are brushing over your lips.
"Can I kiss you?"
You inhale sharply. The word "Yes" hovers on the tip of your tongue, but you don't need to say it out loud. He can already see the answer in the way youâre leaning into him, and his mouth is on yours in an instant.
The reality is, youâve kissed Spencer before. Plenty of times, actually. You know the feel of his lips, the way they can be both gentle and demanding, the way he tastes faintly of coffee or something sweet when heâs had a treat. You also think back to those hurried kisses in the past when time was short and the world was pressing down on you. Or the playful pecks that came with laughter. Even the desperate, heated moments when the need to feel something, anything, was too overwhelming to resist.
This kiss, however, isnât like any of those. This one is slow, and achingly tender. His movements are unhurried. The way his lips glide over yours carries a deep sense of care, like heâs trying to memorize every soft curve. Just as you begin to melt in his arms, he pulls away slightly, not very far, but enough to hover close that you can still feel the heat of his breath on your lips.
Thereâs a tense silence as the tip of his nose brushes gently against your cheek. You can tell heâs giving you the space to decide what happens next, and there are a lot of scenarios running in your head. You could push him away, repeating history all over again. You could be in denial and pretend all of this never even happened. But something inside you snaps.
Maybe itâs the way heâs holding back, so gentle, so careful, too afraid of pushing too far. Or maybe itâs the realization that you donât want him to hold back, that you need more, that youâre tired of resisting what youâve both been dancing around for so long. Before you can second guess yourself, youâre clutching onto the fabric of his hoodie, tugging him closer.
He tenses for a moment, but the hesitation is gone almost as soon as it appears. His mouth finds yours again, and he lets out a deep, relieved sigh. You feel the soft, insistent push of his tongue against the seam of your lips. You hold onto him, parting your mouth eagerly before he slips his tongue with a desperation that catches you off guard.
Then his hands seem to be everywhere all at once, tracing the curve of your spine, sliding down to the small of your back, and brushing along the edge of your jaw. His fingers then tangle in your hair, tugging gently while his other hand skims over your waist. But when his hand slips inside your shirt, calloused fingers brushing your soft skin, you slowly pull away. âW-Wait.â
His eyes widen slightly, and you can feel the shift in his body. âIâm sorry, I didnât mean toââ
âNo, no,â you say quickly, tugging him closer again. âI just⌠I think we should continue this conversation somewhere more⌠private?â
He pauses for a moment. âReally?â
âIf you want to.â
A subtle smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. âAre you trying to seduce me for sex?â
Youâre oscillating between being incredibly turned on and equally mortified. In a sense, yes, thatâs what youâre asking. But you didnât expect him to be so blunt about it. You donât think heâs ever been this direct in the past, and now youâre wondering if you missed something before, or if heâs just tapped into a level of confidence youâre struggling to keep up with.
âWould it be inappropriate if I said that I am?â you ask hesitantly, and you canât help but wince a little as the words leave your mouth.
âSince when have you been worried about being inappropriate with me?â
âWell, Spencer, if you havenât noticed, thereâs a five-year gap since the last time we slept together.â
His hand on your waist tightens slightly. âFive years too long, if you ask me.â Then he pulls you closer until thereâs barely any space left between you. âYou do realize this is you giving me a second chance, right?"
In a way, you do. You've spent so much time convincing yourself that you were better off keeping your distance. Walking away in the past was easy, but now⌠now it feels different. The years have stretched on, and the excuses youâve made have started to wear thin. Especially when just being near him is starting to stir memories you thought youâd buriedâsome good, some less soâbut all intense, all Spencer.
Maybe he's right. Maybe five years is too long to pretend that whatever was between you didn't matter.
You slowly meet his gaze. âI realize.â
âAnd youâre okay with that?â
You hesitate, not out of doubt, but because of the sheer gravity of what you're about to say.
"Maybe."
His sigh is audible when he hears your answer, and without missing a beat, he brushes the barest, lightest, most gentle of kisses on your lips. âMaybe is good.â Kiss. âI can takeââ Kiss. Kiss. ââmaybe.â
You think you should say something more, but all coherent thoughts scatter the instant his lips meet yours again. You return his kisses, hesitant at first, but quickly falling into a rhythm that feels achingly familiar. It doesnât take long until his lips move into something more urgent. Thereâs a hunger there, a pent-up longing that he can no longer hold back. His tongue flicks against yours, teasing, coaxing, and you know you need to stop him before he starts to undress you right there on the couch.
You reluctantly pull back. âBedroom. Now.â
He doesnât need to be told twice. He pulls you to your feet, and youâre practically dragging him to the guest bedroom. When the door closes behind you, heâs quick to guide you toward the bed, his hands firm on your hips as he steers you backward. The moment your legs hit the edge of the bed, he pauses, his hands lingering on your waist, and for a moment, he just looks at you.
âHaving second thoughts?â You tease. The sarcasm drips sweetly in your voice, knowing full well heâs been trying to win your heart the entire evening.
âNo,â he mutters. âIâm trying to see if you are.â
You draw back from his arms just enough to climb onto the bed and lay down in the middle. âDoes it look like I am?â
He shakes his head with that cute, bashful smile. Although thereâs nothing bashful about the way he pulls off his hoodie and tosses it carelessly onto the floor. The shirt underneath is crumpled, and his hair is even messier, sticking up in ways that make you want to run your hands through it.
âCome here,â you motion for him. Without hesitation, he crawls between your legs and leans in for another kiss. His hair feels like the smoothest silk when you finally reach for it. Thereâs a slight dampness from the faint sheen of sweat on his skin, the way it curls just slightly at the ends, brushing against your forehead as he dips his head to capture your mouth.
You donât think you can ever get tired of kissing him. Thereâs a familiarity in the way he moves. His lips mold perfectly to yours, soft yet demanding, as if he knows exactly how to draw out the deepest parts of your desire. And you feel it everywhere. In your pulse, in your veins, all the way down to the spot between your legs.
It intensifies even more when his lips begin to trail down your neck. You feel the first warm rush of arousal pooling in your panties when he presses an open-mouthed kiss to your throat, the fluttering veins below your jaw with so much intensity as if he's taking every one of your heartbeats for himself. Your grip tightens in his hair as he marks another spot near your collarbone.
âIâve missed this so much,â he murmurs as he slowly nips down your neck. âIâve missed you.â
You can only hum a reply, your voice catching in your throat as your head starts to spin from the way his hands are now trailing down your side. He reaches the hem of your shirt and pauses, fingers lightly tugging at the fabric.
âCan I take this off?â He asks, pulling back slightly just enough to look down at you. With his messy hair falling into his glossy brown eyes and swollen wet lips, how can you possibly say no to him?
Without a second thought, you nod, your fingers already moving to help him with the fabric. His eyes never leave yours as he slowly lifts your shirt. It slides up over your skin, and you raise your arms to let him pull it off completely, tossing it aside without a care. Your bra comes off next, and when that follows to the floor, his eyes sweep over your body.
Thereâs a certain look in his gaze. Devotion would be too strong of a word, but itâs something closeâsomething softer, yet just as intense. Youâve seen desire before, felt it in fleeting touches and heated glances, but this is different. This feels different. Itâs as if his gaze is reaching into the spaces between your thoughts, gently pulling at the threads that hold you together to unravel you in the most tender of ways.
He kisses the spot between your breasts.
âYouâre always so pretty.â
He gives a soft peck just above your heart.
âSo incredibly beautiful.â
Then his tongue flicks along the delicate curve of your chest, making a slow, teasing trail upward until he takes one of your nipples into his mouth. He sucks gently, rolling it around with his tongue, and youâre mesmerized by the lewd scene of him drawing your flesh between his lips. Your fingers instinctively find their way back into his hair, tugging on the soft strands as he continues to lap at your sensitive skin.
He then shifts slightly, his mouth releasing your nipple with a soft, wet sound before moving to give the same attention to the other. While he suckles and nibbles on one hardened peak, he rolls the other between his thumb and forefinger, sending a rush of pleasure straight to your core. If you thought you were wet before, youâre certain youâre drenched by now. Your panties cling uncomfortably and the growing desire makes you ache to peel them off.
He must sense your growing need because his kisses trail lower, down to your stomach, while his fingers toy with the waistband of your leggings. His touch is teasing, slipping just under the elastic, and you instinctively lift your hips, silently begging for more. He takes his time as he slides the fabric down your legs, his knuckles brushing against your skin before discarding them somewhere in the room.
Your attention is on him as his palm dances along your inner thigh, and the closer he gets to where you ache him the most, the more your breath hitches in your throat. When his thumb brushes over the wet patch on your panties, your hips buck against him. âSpencerâŚâ
He glances over at you and lets out the most appreciative sigh. You really are beautiful. Eyes full of lust, skin flushed with his marks. Youâre a vision of longing, and every part of him is consumed by the sight of you. âYes?â
You squirm under his gaze. âArenât you⌠going to take them off?â
A slow, teasing smile spreads across his face. âWhat, these?â He gives a playful tug at the edge of your panties, his fingers just barely slipping beneath the fabric before pulling away. âAre you sure you want them off?â
You try to hold back your groan when his thumb finds your clit. âYes. I-Iâm sure.â
He grins, clearly enjoying the effect he has on you, but instead of giving in immediately, he begins to circle your clit slowly with his thumb, watching your reaction closely. âOn a scale from one to ten, how sure are you?â
Now heâs starting to get on your nerves. You canât hold back the small huff falling from your lips. He simply laughs then slowly takes off the last piece of your clothing. The cool air instantly hits your skin as he grabs your knees, spreading your legs apart. He skims along your naked body and when you notice where his gaze settles, you swallow hard, suddenly feeling very shy.
It's kind of ironic, you think, how you've gotten this far, and now, of all times, you're suddenly blushing like a damn teenager. It's as if your brain is catching up to everything your body already knowsâthat this is real, and it's happening. You can't help but laugh at yourself a little. Here you are, all tangled up in each other, practically begging him to get you naked and yet you're acting shy now?
He seems to notice the shift in your mood, his hands pausing on your thighs as he looks up at you with concern. He tilts his head slightly, his brow furrowing. âDid I do something wrong?â
You quickly shake your head. âIâm suddenly feeling very self-conscious.â
He studies your face for a moment. âDo you want me to stop?â
âNo!â you blurt out, more forcefully than you intended, your hand instinctively reaching out to grab his wrist. âI⌠I guess Iâm not used to feeling this exposed in front of you.â
He shifts slightly, moving closer so heâs eye-level with you, his hands still resting gently on your thighs. âWeâve done this countless times before.â
âI know, but that was years ago. Things feel different now⌠like thereâs more at stake, maybe?â You let out a sigh. âItâs silly.â
âItâs not silly,â he reassures you. He soothes the skin behind your thighs. âBut you donât need to feel self-conscious with me. Youâre beautiful, and I just want you to feel as good as you make me feel.â
If he keeps talking to you like that, thereâs no doubt youâll end up giving him your heart on a silver platter by the end of this. He shifts lower down your body. âWe can go as slow as you want,â he continues, pressing a kiss to the inside of your thigh, then another. âJust tell me what you need.â
You take a deep breath as his soft stubble grazes your skin. âI need you.â
âThen youâll have me.â
You watch with heavy lids as he drags his lips along your skin until he presses the most tender kiss on your cunt. He really wasnât lying when he said he could go as slow as you want because every kiss is achingly gentle, barely more than a feather-light touch. Itâs the kind of softness that makes you writhe beneath him, and before you know it, your fingers are tangling in his curls while your hips buck against his face.
Thereâs a slight vibration on your skinâit could be his laughter, or maybe just a hum of contentmentâbut you donât bother deciphering it. Youâre too lost in the sensation as his tongue breaches your folds. You peer down and watch as he trails the tip of his tongue through your wetness, slowly tracing up and down your slit until he flicks it against your clit.
Youâre honestly gone after that. Youâre not surprised, though. If thereâs one thing Spencer Reid is good at, itâs knowing exactly how to use his mouth. Sure, heâs a bona fide genius who spouts off random facts and quotes obscure literature, but his mouth? His mouth is a whole different level of expertise. Itâs almost unfair how good he is. Itâs like heâs studied you, memorized every little thing that makes you go crazy, and now heâs putting all that knowledge to devastatingly good use.
And itâs not like heâs doing it just for your pleasure. It brings him the same deep satisfaction. His eyes are closed, and he seems to lose himself in the act, savoring every taste, every reaction, every subtle shift of your body beneath him. Itâs as though heâs completely immersed in finding an almost insatiable need to drink in everything about you. His tongue delves deeper, swirling around your entrance before sucking gently on your folds, pulling the soft skin into his mouth.
You find yourself pressing his head closer to your heat. His eyes flickers up to you. âYouâre back.â Your response is simply another push of his head. âOh. Needy, are we now?â
"Mhm," you manage to squeak out, feeling a rush of wetness seeping out of you. He leans in, his tongue catching a bead of moisture before it drips further, dragging it between your slick folds.
Your grip in his hair tightens.
âSpencerâŚâ
âI know, I know,â he murmurs, his lips curling into a smile before his mouth descends again, this time focusing on your clit. His tongue flicks over the sensitive nub before he gently sucks, pulling it into his mouth with a slow rhythm that has you gasping. Each motion is perfectly timed and you feel yourself growing even wetter under his attention. His tongue swirls, then flattens before he sucks a little harder.
It doesnât take long for you to feel that familiar coil in your stomach. The pleasure builds steadily, the tension winding tighter and tighter until it slowly overwhelms you. Spencer seems to sense it too, his hands gripping the back of your thighs a little tighter, pushing them further apart as he continues with unwavering focus. Heâs not rushing, though, heâs savoring it, but his slow motion is enough to make you snap.
Your hips jerk against his mouth, and he doesnât miss a beat, holding you steady as he continues his ministrations. Heâs relentless in his gentleness, coaxing every ounce of pleasure from you, even as youâre left gasping for air. When you finally come down from the high, Spencer finally lifts his head and places a final, soft kiss on your inner thigh.
âDo you still feel self-conscious now?â
It takes you a moment before you can answer. You smile lazily at him. âNot after that.â
He grins and pulls you up into a sitting position. âDo you think you can give me another one?â
âSpencer,â you breathe out. âEven if you gave me thousands of orgasms, Iâd probably ask for more.â
The laugh he lets out is warm and infectious, the sound vibrating through you in a way that makes you smile even wider. âWell,â he starts, slipping his hand down your thigh. âThe human body is capable of experiencing multiple orgasms in a relatively short period of time, especially for women. So technically, you could keep asking for more, and I could keep giving them.â
âEven up to a thousand?â
âMaybe not to that extent.â He pulls you close, and you lean your weight against him. âHold on to me.â
You do as youâre told and somehow you find yourself in a new position. When he spreads your legs apart, your senses go on high alert again. âSpence?â
He kisses your cheek, your jaw, then the corner of your mouth. âTry to relax.â
A gasp escapes your lips as his fingers dive between your thighs. Try to relax? Try to relax? Men and their audacity to tell you what to do, especially when they're the reason you're so wound up in the first place. Because how are you supposed to relax when his fingertips are brushing ever so gently over your clit? How are you supposed to calm your breathing when heâs spreading your arousal up and down your folds?
And how are you supposed to keep your composure when he suddenly fills you with, not one, but two of his fingers?
You feel yourself slipping and he tightens his other arm around your waist. âTold you to hold on.â
Heâs starting to annoy you, but you listen to him and bury your face in the crook of his neck. You take a deep breath as he starts to move his fingers. Soap, you decide. It must be his soap, because he smells clean and crisp, almost like fresh linen and a hint of something peppery. Itâs almost distracting if it werenât for the way his fingers are curling inside of you.
Then you feel that sensation again, the kind that ripples through every nerve of your body. At first, itâs manageable, an intensity you think you can handle. But when he suddenly changes his technique, everything shifts. His entire hand moves in a fast, up-and-down motion that catches you completely off guard, and before you know it, youâre whining, your grip tightening on him as your head falls on his shoulder.
The rapid pace makes your head spin. It feels like heâs pulling the control right out of your hands, leaving you questioning your own limits. Youâve seen yourself getting wet, youâve felt yourself become drenched before, but youâve never experienced anything like this. You never realized your body could produce this much liquid. Itâs not an overwhelming amount, but more than youâve ever seen from yourself, and it splatters against his hand, dripping down your thighs.
He doesnât stop, doesnât even flinch when your nails claw into his shirt. He keeps going, and going, and going, until the only thing you hear is your rapid breathing against his neck and the slick, wet sounds heâs coaxing out of you. Youâre overwhelmed (in the best way, of course) but you canât stop yourself from cursing as the sensation intensifies, multiplies even.
It's not until your body starts to go limp that he finally takes pity on you. He slows down, his fingers pumping lazily inside you. âGood?â
âHow did youâwhen did youââ you exhale a long breath. âI canât feel my legs.â
He slowly withdraws his fingers out, only to rub your essence over your puffy clit, and your hips jerk once more before he finally stops. You're a trembling mess once you sink into the mattress.
âI donât think Iâve seen you do that before.â
âI donât think Iâve ever done that in my life.â Your eyes suddenly feel incredibly heavy that you can't resist letting them flutter close.
He kisses the tip of your nose. âStill up for another one?â
You peer through one eye, and when you catch him starting to undress himself, your other eye shoots open. The nod you give him is eager. His smile widens as he shrugs off his shirt, and you canât help but let your gaze drop to the line of hair trailing down his stomach. You wonder what it would feel like under your tongue.
"Wait."
Your eyes snap back up to meet his. "What?"
His face twists into a grimace. âI donât have a condom.â
Shit. Neither did you.
You roll onto your side, propping yourself up on one elbow and resting your head in your hand. âAnd youâre realizing this just now?â
âI was too focused with you."
And by that, he means giving you the most intense orgasm of your life. You watch as his fingers hover over his belt. âYou really didnât think of bringing one when you decided to come over?â
âMy intention coming here wasnât exactly for this.â
âWell, it would be great if you at least considered the possibility." You study his face and blurt out the first thing on your mind, âI donât want to stop.â
He shifts his weight on the bed. âMe neither.â
âI mean⌠we could have sex without using one. Weâve done it before. Once.â
He recalls what you're referring to and lets out an amused laugh. âAre you sure? Didnât you freak out when you realized your period was late?â
âThat was a coincidence! I was stressed out at that time, but Iâm safe nowâI think.â You pause, brows furrowing as you start calculating your cycle in your head. âYeah, Iâm pretty sure Iâm not ovulating.â
âPretty sure?â
You give him a look. âNo, Iâm actually sure. I know my body, and Iâve done the math. See?â You gesture vaguely, as if the numbers and facts are floating in front of you. âNo ovulation in sight.â
The corners of his mouth twitches into a smile. âAlright then,â he murmurs, and leans down to plant a soft kiss on your lips. âNo ovulation in sight.â
âNone,â you confirm before tugging his belt. âCan you please take off your pants now?â
He compliesâwith incredible speedâand when heâs finally as naked as you, your mouth waters at the sight of him. His cock is painfully hard, thick, with a bead of arousal glistening at the tip. You try to reach for him, but he has other plans. He crawls over your body and slips between your legs. He then grips the back of your thigh with one hand, pulling it up slightly to open you to him, while the other holds himself from the base.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
The moan you let out is lewd. âFuck, Spencer.â
An airy laugh slips out from him as he rubs the head of his cock around your clit. âSo needy.â
You wiggle your hips. âHurry up.â
He only hums in response, before easing his hips back just enough to drag his swollen tip through your slick outer lips. The underside of his cock splits your folds open with each stroke, and your head is spinning. Itâs almost sweet how heâs taking this slow, but at this point, youâre so close to just shoving him inside you. You let out a frustrated whine when he pulls back, only to thrust forward just enough for the head of his cock to nudge at your entrance.
Your walls squeeze around him.
âO-OhâŚâ His mouth falls open slightly as he stares down at where your bodies meet. âI⌠I donât remember you being this tight.â
You follow his gaze, watching the way your outer lips swallow him inch by inch. âI-Itâs been a while.â
He pushes further, and your nails dig into his shoulders as he stretches you in a way that feels almost too much, and you can't help but tense when he thrusts further. He wraps your leg around his waist before leaning down, propping his weight on his elbows.
âNeed you to relax,â he murmurs, his lips ghosting over the pulse fluttering wildly in your neck. You do as he says. Breathe in, breathe out. Clench, unclench. And then you feel him easing inside you, oh-so-deliciously slow, until you squeak out a gasp when he finally fills you completely.
Because fuck, he stretches youâwrenches you open, and youâre consumed by his heat, the pressure, the sheer size of him. It overwhelms your senses, and all you can do is sing out a filthy moan. He follows your tune with a melody of his own, though his voice trembles, sounding more like heâs in pain as if heâs trying to hold himself back.
âYouâre so warm,â he groans, his breath hot against your skin. âYou okay?â
You nod and wrap an arm around his shoulders. âMore than okay.â
âDo you think I can move?â
âPlease.â
Thereâs no hesitation in the way he pulls back, only to sink into you again. His hips roll against yours in a way that feels both achingly slow and unhurried, like heâs savoring every second to memorize the way you feel around him. Itâs like he canât quite believe this is happening, that youâre giving him the chance to be tangled up with you in this position again.
And truthfully, neither can you.
But here you are, two bodies moving in perfect harmony, intertwined in the most primal, human way. Flesh against flesh, breath against breath. Even your heartbeats sync in the same rhythm. The world beyond seems to dissolve, leaving nothing but the pull of desire that draws you deeper into the moment, into him, until the boundaries of where you end and he begins blur into something undefinable.
Itâs nonexistent. Youâre glued to him, fused in a way that feels as if this is exactly where you belong.
No more running away, you decide.
âKiss me.â
Heâs in no position to decline, and within a heartbeat, he captures your lips in the sweetest kissâwell, as sweet as it can go. Because even though he tastes like honeyed warmth, his hips continue to pound into you, hitting that deep, tender spot inside. You whine against his lips. A needy, breathless sound that has him faltering for just a second, his hips stuttering against yours.
âYou feel soââ he chokes on his words. âGod, youâre so perfect.â
Youâre perfect, you want to say, but you stop yourself, biting down on the words before they escape. Itâs not that you donât believe it. You just canât bring yourself to admit it out loud. Not yet. Instead, your need wins out, pushing past everything else.
âMore,â you gasp between shallow breaths.
He rests his forehead against yours. âYeah? You want me to go faster?â
You whine in approval.
The instant he pulls back, his tip barely teasing your entrance before slamming into you again, a sharp gasp escapes your lips. He repeats the motion. Once. Twice. By the third time, he doesnât hold back, driving his hips hard and fast, the wet sound of your bodies slapping together echoing off the walls.
You turn into a putty mess. You can barely think, let alone form words, your mind clouded with nothing but the feeling of himâinside you, around you. Your whole world narrows down to this moment, to the way he fills you so perfectly. His forehead stays pressed against yours the whole time, his lips hovering above yours he murmurs, âTell me if itâs too much.â
But itâs not. Itâs everything. Maybe even not enough. âIâŚâ you gasp when a certain angle from him hits a deep spot inside you. âOh, Spencer⌠harder, p-please.â
Heâs more than happy to oblige.
He shifts slightly, then snaps his hips forward with a sudden, forceful thrust. He repeats the motion. Over and over again. His pace is relentless now, and he starts to pant, his breath coming in sharp, ragged bursts, every exhale brushing against your lips. Thereâs a tension in his body, a taut strain in muscles, but he doesnât stop. He canât stop. And you canât help but moan softly into his mouth, swallowing each of his gasps as his control starts to slip away.
âWhere do you wantââ His voice falters. âCan Iâinsideââ
You nod frantically. âYes. Yes.â
Itâs enough to push you both over the edge.
The sensation starts as a gentle warmth in your fingertips, slowly winding its way through your body. It weaves through your limbs, spirals up your spine, before gathering intensely at your core. Youâre shaking, trembling, and you instinctively reach out for something to ground yourself. One hand threads into his curls, the other clutches his jaw.
Then it happens. His cock moves in a frantic rhythm, sending you spiraling deeper into intense pleasure for the third time tonight. Your inner walls tighten around him as your orgasm crashes through you, gripping him so tightly that it pulls a raw, breathless groan from his lips. He slams into you with uneven thrusts as he presses your body flat onto the bed, until he stops and shudders, spilling hot, white liquid deep inside you.
You donât think youâve ever felt something this intense beforeânot even with him in the past. Every inch of your body is buzzing as his warmth spreads through you, reaching places you didnât even know existed. You cling to him, your nails softly grazing his back as he finally lets out a satisfied hum, his lips moving to pepper kisses along your face.
He starts with your left cheek. Two gentle kisses. He moves to your right, giving a light peck that lingers just a moment longer, almost as if heâs blowing a warm breath against your skin. You giggle as the air tickles you. Then finally, he settles on your lips with a sigh that merges into a kiss. Itâs soft, sweet, and tenderly slow.
You let out another laugh when he finally pulls away.
âWhat?â
His curls fall messily on his forehead and you reach up, brushing it back. âYouâre starting to grow on me.â
He quirks an eyebrow. âI grow on you?â You simply nod. âLike fungus?â
Your fingers pause in his hair. âLike what?â
"You know, fungus. It grows on things. Like mold or mushrooms,â he explains and gives you a smile. "Am I growing on you like that?"
Youâve been apart for so long that you almost forgot how his brain works. His unexpected comparison sparks your amusement, so you decide to humor him. âDepends on what kind of mushroom you are.â
He looks thoughtful for a while. âThere's this mushroom called mycorrhiza. It forms a symbiotic relationship with trees and helps them grow by improving water and nutrient absorption."
âAnd that makes you what, exactly?â
âEssentially indispensable.â
âSo youâre claiming youâre good for me?â
A slow, confident grin spreads across his lips. âIâm saying Iâm exactly what you need.â
You burst out laughing. Your cheeks might actually ache from smiling this much. âThat was pretty smooth.â
He looks incredibly pleased with himself. Then after a quiet moment, he buries his face in the curve of your neck. You close your eyes, feeling the rise and fall of his chest against yours, and a sigh escapes your lips. Itâs like all the time you spent apart melts away in that single breath, and something inside you relaxes, as if heâs managed to sneak back into the parts of you youâd forgotten existed.
Maybe he is right. Maybe, after all this time, heâs exactly what you need.
You wake up to the sound of clatter. Itâs loud, jarring, and it echoes around the house. You stir in bed, stretching your limbs before tensing when you feel something poking your back. Your hazy mind immediately snaps into alert, and you open your eyes fully, glancing toward the window. Sunlight is already pouring into the room, far too bright for how early you thought it was.
You quickly turn over to the other side.
âSpencer. Spencer!â you hiss, shaking his shoulders urgently. âWake up! We overslept!â
He groans softly but doesnât move. Another loud clatter bounces off the walls, and your heart pounds wildly in your chest.
âSpencer,â you whisper sharply, eyes widening. âI think Matt is home.â
That finally gets his attention. He blinks his eyes open. âWhaâ?â
Youâre already halfway out of bed, rushing to the window to peek through the curtains. Sure enough, you spot your brotherâs car parked in the driveway. âYep, heâs here,â you mutter under your breath, the panic rising as you turn back to Spencer. âAnd now heâs going to kill us.â
âHeâs not going to kill us,â he mumbles, but even by his voice, you can tell heâs not entirely convinced. You watch as he finally slips out of bed, scrambling to pick up his clothes scattered across the floor. âWe talked about this last night. Itâs not going to be as bad as you think.â
You shoot him a look before quickly pulling on your own clothes.
âThereâs a big difference between telling him, and him finding out that his sister is sleeping with his friend while he was away taking care of his wife and baby.â You yank your shirt over your head. âIn his freaking house.â
When you put it that way, Spencerâs heart sinks a little. Although Matt isnât a violent person, he has twice the muscle he does, and itâs not hard to imagine him being a lot less forgiving in a situation like this. He canât help but picture the worst-case scenario even though Mattâs always been the reasonable type.
Until now, maybe.
âDo you think I should climb out the window?â
You stare at him in disbelief. "Spencer, youâre not sixteen.â
âActually, Iâve never been in a situation like this,â he admits, pulling up his pants. âMy biggest concern when I was sixteen was getting my first PhD.â
You forgot how ridiculously smart he is. Smarter than most people, definitely smarter than you. âWell now youâre getting firsthand experience.â You start pacing around the room. âLetâs just try to stay calm.â
âThatâs kind of hard to do when your brother could walk in while Iâm half-naked.â
You look at him in horror. âThen put your damn shirt on!"
Before he can reply, there's a noise from outside the roomâa quick shuffle of steps, light and rapid, as if someoneâs rushing down the hall. You barely have time to react before the door is wrenched open.
But it's not your brother.
It's far worse.
You feel your stomach drop when your eyes lands on the small figure of your nephew, standing there with wide eyes. His gaze shifts back and forthâfrom you, disheveled and clearly flustered, to Spencer, whose bare back is facing the door, still fumbling with his pants. From little Jake's point of view, it must look like the most confusing sight, because he quickly retreats, bolting down the hallway.
âDad! Help! Thereâs a strange man in Auntieâs room!â
You donât know whether to laugh or panic. The fact that Jake didnât recognize Spencer without his usual suit is almost comical. You glance at him, noticing how his body has tensed, his back straightening in alarm.
âWho was that?â he whispers, turning to you with wide eyes.
"Jake.â You blow a strand of hair that falls across your face. âWho apparently thinks you're an intruder."
The blood seems to drain from his face. âHe didnât recognize me?â
Your eyes flick over his appearanceâhis wild, tangled hair sticking out in all directions, bare chest still slightly flushed from sleep, and pants barely zipped. âNot when you look like this, no.â
But before he can respond, you hear the unmistakable sound of footsteps echoing down the hallway, heavier this time.
Your heart leaps into your throat.
âShit.â
âI should have climbed out the window.â
The idea of him dangling from the window is even more absurd. You glance toward the door. "Okay, wait here. Let me talk to Matt first." Your eyes flicker to his bare chest again, and you let out the most exasperated sigh. "And please, for the love of God, put on your shirt."
You donât have time to wait for his response as you rush out of the room, quickly closing the door behind you. You take a second to catch your breath, trying to compose yourself, when a noise down the hallway draws your attention. Only then do you notice Matt cautiously advancing towards your way, his back against the wall.
Thatâs when you spot the gun in his hand.
âSeriously?â you hiss, staring at him in disbelief. âWhat the hell, Matthew!â
He looks at you, equally surprised. âJake said there was a strange man in your room!â he replies defensively, tightening his grip on the weapon. âWhat was I supposed to think?ââ
Your eyes shift toward your nephew, whoâs peeking around the corner, his little head barely visible as he watches the scene unfold. This is definitely not how you expected your morning to go. A simple, awkward conversation was one thing, but having to disarm your brother while explaining this mess was an entirely different level.
âThereâs no intruder, Matt. Put the gun down.â
He looks past you, his eyes zeroing in on the closed bedroom door. âThen whoâs in there?â
You bite the inside of your cheek. Thereâs no easy way to explain this. How do you even start? That Spencer is standing half-naked in the guest room, trying to gather his dignity after being mistaken for an intruder by a six-year-old? You never thought you'd have to introduce Spencer to your brother this way, in his own house, under these chaotic circumstances.
You can feel Matt's eyes boring into you, waiting for an answer. All you can think is how ridiculous this all must look, and how there's no good way to smooth over the fact that, yes, Spencer Reid, his friend slash teammate, is behind the door. And the most absurd part? A part of you is more worried about the look on Matt's face than the fact that he's holding a gun.
âPlease donât be mad.â
You hold your breath as you slowly reach for the doorknob. You push the door open and let out a small, relieved sound when you see Spencer fully dressed, looking almost presentable, except for the wild hair that refuses to settle. He gives you a small nod before stepping out of the room.
âUncle Spencer?â Jakeâs small voice cuts through the tension. Mattâs gaze darts between you two, his jaw tightening as he puts the pieces together. You can see the moment realization hits him full force.
âReid?â Mattâs voice is incredulous, bordering on betrayed. âWhat the hell is going on?â
âI can explain,â you say cautiously. âItâs not exactly how it looks.â
âNot exactly how it looks?â Matt echoes, his eyes narrowing at you, then shifting back to Spencer. âYouâre in my guest room looking like you just rolled out of bedââ
âFully clothed now,â Spencer cuts in quickly, which only earns him a frown from Matt.
âNot helping,â you mutter under your breath, shooting Spencer a look before turning back to your brother. âFine, itâs exactly how it looks like. So⌠uh, surprise?â
You watch so many emotions flashing in his eyes. Mattâs always been a good brother. Sometimes annoying, but always reliable. He doesnât usually get angry at youâquite the opposite, actually. Heâs calm, level-headed, and more prone to offering advice than raising his voice. But now? The frustration is clear in his eyes.
Heâs not mad exactly, but heâs definitely not happy either.
âSurprise?â Matt repeats, his voice flat. His gaze flick back to Spencer, whoâs now shifting his weight awkwardly beside you. âThis is how you decided to tell me?â
âOkay, itâs not how we planned it, obviously.â
âClearly,â he deadpans.
You put on the best, innocent-looking face you can muster.
âMaaatttt,â you try again, deciding to use a different approach by being cute this time. âDonât be so harsh.â
To your relief, it actually works on him, like it usually does whenever you try to charm your way out of trouble. His tough exterior falters because, no matter what, youâre still his baby sister. His face softens for a moment, shoulders dropping as he lets out a sigh.
âIâm not mad, okay? But I am your brother. And you,â he adds, pointing at Spencer. âYouâre supposed to be my friend. I feel like I shouldâve known about this before⌠well, before finding you like this.â Your shoulders slumps at his words. âHow long has this been going?â
Now that is a tricky question. Explaining that you and Spencer occasionally had sex five years ago definitely isnât something your brother needs to hear right nowâor ever, really. You can almost feel Spencer tense beside you, probably having the same thought.
You clear your throat. âLast night.â
"Last night?" Matt looks at you as if youâre crazy. It might be the most disapproving look heâs ever given to you. "You're telling me this just started last night?"
"Butâ" you quickly add, holding up a hand to stop his train of thought. "Weâve been talking for a while, itâs not like it happened out of nowhere. Last night was just the first time we decided to actually do something about it."
âRight under my roof?â Mattâs brows pinches upward. âYou lied about having a headache, didnât you?â
âWait, you had a headache? Why didnât you tell me?â
Youâre not sure you can handle two men pestering you at the same time. You focus on your brother instead.
âLook, we didnât plan anything yesterday. Things just⌠happened,â you say, trying to explain without making it sound worse than it already does. âBut itâs not only about last night. For what itâs worth, we were planning to tell to you. Just not like this.â
Your brother cocks an eyebrow. âSo this isnât a one-time thing?â
Spencer doesnât hesitate. âGod, no,â he says. You feel an arm snake around your waist. âI care about her. A lot.â
Matt stares at Spencer for a long moment, his face a mixture of frustration, concern, and something else. Acceptance, maybe. He looks back at you. âIs this what you want?â
You feel Spencerâs grip tighten on your waist. Heâs also waiting for your answer.
âItâs what I want.â
Spencerâs thumb brushes over you as Matt lets out a long breath, his grip on the gun finally relaxing. âThis feels weird.â
âIn a good way?â
âIn a bizarre kind of way.â Mattâs falls falls on Spencer again. âIâm still trying to process this, but if you hurt herââ
âI wonât,â Spencer promises. âI swear.â
âGood, because you know I can put you back to prison if you do.â
Oh, he knows. Spencer understands exactly what he means, after all, Matt was one of the few people who helped clear his name during one of the most horrific moments of his life. Even if thereâs a slight jab in his words, Spencer can tell heâs being dead serious. Especially with that gun still attached to his grip.
You, on the other hand, are hearing this for the first time. âWait, what?â you blurt out. âPrison? You went to prison?â
Spencer merely shrug. Matt finally lowers his weapon, shaking his head as if he canât quite believe this is happening. âI need coffee,â he mutters, turning toward the kitchen.
âWaitâŚâ Jake finally peeks out from behind the wall. You blink your eyes, forgetting heâs even there. âDoes this mean Uncle Spencer is your boyfriend now?â
You feel three pair of eyes on you. Mattâs gaze is sharp. Spencerâs expression is cautious. And then thereâs Jake, looking up at you with the straightforward curiosity only a child can have. To him, things are simple. Either you are, or you arenât, and in hindsight, it really is a straightforward question. But nothing about this situation has been straightforward.
You look at Spencer for a fraction of a second. You can see the nervous hope reflected in his eyes. Maybe Jakeâs question isnât just his⌠maybe itâs Spencerâs too.
And sure, maybe it doesnât have to be so complicated. Maybe it really is as simple as sayingâ
âYes.â You can feel your heartbeat in your ears. âI suppose he is.â
If youâve ever seen Spencer being happy, it pales in comparison to this. His eyes light up, and he looks at you like youâre the only person in the world. A genuine, almost boyish smile spreads across his face as you feel his warmth seep into your skin. Thereâs so much affection in his gaze it makes your chest tighten. Heâs not just happy. Heâs beaming.
Matt clears his throat awkwardly. âCome on, kiddo, letâs grab what your mom needs and get back to the hospital.â He glances back at you. âYou guys coming?â
You nod absentmindedly. âSure.â
He throws you both a look. Not hateful, but definitely not warm either. You see him grip his gun from the corner of your eye, more out of habit than necessity, before steering his son away with a firm hand on his shoulders.
âThat went better than expected,â Spencer mutters the moment your brother is out of earshot.
ââItâs not going to be as bad as you thinkâ,â you mock, reciting the words he said to you half an hour ago.
âIt wasnât.â
âSpencer, he held a gun.â
âHe thought I was an intruder. I wouldâve done the same thing,â he points out, his tone surprisingly calm as he holds you by your waist. âRelax, okay? Heâll come around us. Eventually.â
âYouâre awfully optimistic about this.â
âHe likes me.â
He does have a point. Matt has always had a soft spot for Spencer, but youâre not sure how far that can go after what just happened. âI think you might have lost a few brownie points today.â
He considers the truth in your words. âMaybe,â he admits with a shrug. âBut at least I earned a few with you.â
âBecause of the boyfriend thing?â Heâs grinning so wide that his eyes practically disappear into crescent moons. You poke the slightest dimple on his cheek. âDonât act so smug. Iâm still trying to process the fact that Iâm dating an ex-felon.â
âI was framed,â he explains, and the way he says it so nonchalantly only deepens your confusion. He tries to smooth your frown with a kiss. âIâll tell you everything on our first date.â
âWho said Iâll go on a date with you?â
âYou will,â he simply says, like itâs the most obvious thing in the world.
âAnd what makes you so sure?â
Because heâs always been sure. The man who doubts everything, who overanalyzes every situation, looks at you with a certainty that makes your heart swell. Youâve seen that look beforeâthe one that says heâs considered every possible outcome and decided this is the one that matters most. Thereâs something magnetic about it, the way he seems to know exactly what he wants, and right now, itâs you.
âBecause Iâm your mushroom.â
Heâs so silly, yet thereâs something so perfectly Spencer about it that makes the idea of not going on a date with him feel impossible. You shake your head, unable to suppress your smile.
âYouâre ridiculous,â you mutter, but the warmth in your chest tells you heâs already won your heart.
And you donât mind him keeping it.
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid smut#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fic#spencer reid x fem!reader smut#spencer reid#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x female reader#spencer reid x fanfiction#spencerreid#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid fluff#Fanfiction#gifwriting
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''River's Quest..?,,
Protagonist Oc [River!] x Bottom male Reader
Part 2! Part 1
Tw/s: overstimulation, rough rough sex, face fucking, dacryphilia, hair grabbing/pulling, jealous River, public sex, almost caught, a bit of degration, a bit of praising, a bit of edging.
[Loading...]
[System]
âQuest startedâ
`Click here for details`
Recently, you've made a new friend and River's been pouty about it even if you dont know the reason behind his poutiness. Not only that, he had become even more clingy than before, where ever you went, he was always not too far behind, making you feel a bit suffocated. It all started not too long ago. How you met your new friend, that is.
ËËË ę° âĄ ęą ËËË
"Hey can we be partners?", a feathery voice asked as a finger tapped your shoulder. This is the first time anyone has asked you to be their partner in a project, ever since that incident. Everyone's been too nervous to partner up with you seeing as River is always around you. Well, almost anyway. Today was different, River had a very important project to attend to, leaving you all alone in class. The moment the guy had asked you to partner up, it was immediately followed by the other classmates surrounding you with the same question, shoving the shy classmate aside. "Can we be partners!?", they all giddily said, making you feel overwhelmed at the sudden focus. You knew it was all because they wanted to get in River's good graces seeing as you're the closest person to him at the moment. Even closer than Aria, his very own 'girlfriend.' With the whole classroom being filled with the cacophony of voices, everyone wanting you to partner up with them, the teacher had no choice but to slam the board to get everyone's attention. "Everyone calm down, you're all being way too loud for anyone's liking, especially [Name]'s, how on earth will he be able to choose with you all talking on top of each other?" Thankfully, they all stayed quiet for a moment, looking at you with anticipation.
You decided to go with the guy who didn't try to make you go deaf, the one who had the guts to ask you in the first place before the domino effect took place. In all honesty, you should have paid more attention to the way his eyes scanned you up and down before sitting next to you.
"Thanks", he says, looking into your eyes for no reason in particular. You nod and begin to workout the project, pulling out your notes and laptop. "Let's start it right now since the deadline's pretty tight." Without your knowledge, he continues to stare at you even though you aren't looking directly at him. He eventually does snap out of it after you look at him, confused on why he's staring. Directing his focus on the task at hand. "Yeah..definitely", his voice sounded like a kid who was caught with his hand inside a cookie jar.
Reviewing over the material together, the two of you eventually map out the entire project, splitting the material between the both of you. You had the task of making the presentation while he had the task of condensing the material to make it easier to digest. You press on the power button on your laptop, expecting it to boot up immediately. Only to be greeted with a black screen. "Huh? I could've sworn I charged it last night", you scratch your head, confusion plastered on your face. "What's wrong?", he asked, despite his words, you felt it was void of any worry. You shake your head, "it's nothing, I'll just make the presentation at my dorm and send it to you afterwards", you begin to put back your notes and laptop into your bag. Coincidentally, the bell suddenly rings, indicating the end of class and school altogether. Though, before you could get up from your chair, you felt a tight grip on your wrist, stopping you. "Can I come over? It'll be much more efficient and effective", he smiles, expecting you to agree, "I don't know about that...", you hesitate since nobody from campus has ever been in your house, apart from your close friends that is. But, no harm would be done right? It's just a simple presentation.
Click! the lock clicked open as you turned the key. You grab the handle and pull it, opening the door to your dorm. Peaceful and quiet. Those are the words not a lot of students who live in dorms can use to describe their place due to having a messy roommate or what not. Fortunately for you, your roommate had moved out not long ago, leaving the whole dorm to yourself. "No roommate?" "nope", you answer simply, getting the point across quickly. "Take a seat on the sofa, I'm just going to put my things down, and we can get started", you grab your laptop out of your bag before placing it near your bed. The laptop is placed on your desk, you plug it in and make sure that this time it's on. The last thing you want now is to prolong the guy's stay. You sit down next to him, notes in hand. "Oh right, I never got your name", he perks up at this, "it's Trav!", "nice to meet you, Trav, I'mâ", "[Name], yes I know", he cuts you off almost excitedly. He really is unpredictable. Partly because of this, the atmosphere becomes awkward, the two of you not having any topics to bring up.
"Well...Do you want a drink? I can make us some hot chocolate or tea if you prefer that", you try to break the awkward silence with a question, "some hot chocolate sounds nice", he nods as he says this. You get up to boil some water as you get two cups and two packets of hot chocolate mix. "Hope you don't mind instant hot chocolate", you chuckle, "of course not", you could hear him laugh a bit aswell. At least you managed to break the awkwardness for just a moment. The whole time you were making the hot chocolate, you felt him starin at you but whenever you turned around, he wouldn't be looking at you at all. This whole thing was kinda creeping you out but what could you do? You were the one who picked him to be your partner in the first place.
With two cups of hot chocolate in your hands, you head back to the couch and hand him a cup. He thanks you and takes a sip of the drink, "delicious!", he says while looking at you, not paying attention to the cup as some of the liquid spills onto your shirt, "ow shit!", you wince, feeling the hot chocolate on your skin. Seeing this, Trav remains calm, reaching over to grab a few tissues and wiping your shirt a bit, "I think you should take this off", you nod, you'll just change to another shirt, no big deal. You tug your shirt over your head, your hair being ruffled a bit and you get up to toss it in the laundry basket. Trav stared at your half naked body, oogling at your frame before you finally find a sweater to put on, ending his wandering eyes from looking even more.
It's been a month since your first meeting with Trav. You noticed his shy persona going away little by little. Now he's definitely more confident. At least he has the confidence to be 'jokingly flirtatious' with you. Not to mention you surprisingly haven't gotten a love quest ever since you started hanging out with Trav more than River. River took notice of this quickly. He was only gone for a day, and you already made yourself a friend? A friend who dares to flirt with you no less. Do you not know who you are? You ought to be more careful.
Due to this, River has been even more protective of you. He even holds your hand tightly in class under the table. And at this moment, he'd doing exactly that. His fingers intertwined with yours, unwilling to let go even if your hand's sweating. "Let go of my handâ", "no", he answers firmly, not even looking at you as though it was an obvious answer. You huff, you've tried to pull away but his grip's too strong. It just ends up with him pulling the "puppy" eyes on you, making you sigh in defeat almost everytime. "That's all for today's material, please don't forget to turn in your work tomorrow morning on my desk", the teacher says as she walks out the door with the class finally over. You thought you'd be free from River's grip, but no, he was still holding your hand when you got up. "Where are you going?", he asked, looking up at you to which you reply, "none of your business", if this was a cartoon, an irk mark would have appeared on your forehead. You've barely had enough time to yourself, let alone with friends after getting into River's sight. "Let go", your tone somewhat frustrated, hoping he'd let go. This of course, doesn't work, "I'll go with youâ", "hey River, can you help me with this?", a random classmate comes up to his desk, handing him a big stack of paper, he reaches for the papers with both hands, letting go of yours in the process and leaving an opening for you to finally sprint out of class to hang out with your friend.
You thought River would follow you but when you look back, he's nowhere to be seen, making you let out a sigh of relief rather than defeat. Looking around, you find yourself at the end of a hallway connecting to a garden. You check your phone to see it's 3:10PM. Trav had promised to meet you here so the two of you could walk home together after he showed you something in the garden. But it seems like he's running a bit late considering it's been 10 minutes since the promised time. You were late too but considering he hasn't even arrived yet, you were quite early. You decide to give him a call. *ring* *ring*, but no answer. "Did his teacher hold him back?", you wonder as you stand there waiting for him to show up.
After a couple more minutes, you felt a pair of hands covering your eyes, covering your sight. "Trav?", you guess only to hear a very pouty, "Trav!?" Turning around, you were met face to face with River, "you thought I was Trav?", his expression turns gloom, disappointed and blue. Seeing this, you roll your eyes, he's probably pretending like he always is to get your sympathy, "I was expecting Trav to show up, he's running a bit late", you explain the situation with a tired look, "kindly fuck off", you smile with a hint of anger. It's been ages since you walked home with a friend, he should at least let you breathe once in a while. Just as you say that, he grabs your wrist, pulling you to the storage room, which is conveniently placed within that hallway, not letting you slip away.
He closes the door with one hand, the other still gripping your hand just as hard. "[Name], you have no idea what Trav will end up doing. You do know who you are, don't you?", he asks as if it's the mosy obvious question in the world. You squint your eyes in confusion, "what do you mean?", he opens his mouth to say something but stops to rub his forehead a bit, "have you not checked the system window?", this made you even more confused, what reason would you have to check it? You shake your head. He stays silent for a bit, his face looks as if he's finally put one and one together. A sigh is let out before he speaks, "so that's why you've been so idiotic and oblivious", you're clearly offended by this statement, no, this lie. "Excuse you."
"You've made me upset, [Name]", he pouts once more, "you know, I was actually starting to think you liked him", he says with another sigh, a sigh of relief this time, "who?", you ask, confused still, "Trav!", he says in a slightly louder voice, your hand free of his grasp by now. You couldn't help but laugh at his admittion, "so..Let me get this straight, you were being an annoying bastard just because you got jealous of Trav?", you couldn't stop laughing. The mere thought of a protagonist getting jealous of an unimportant role was just hilarious. This comment made him frown, his emotions are not to be taken lightly. He'll definitely show you.
[System]
âRiver's Questâ
Accept the punishment given
"The what quest?", you raise an eyebrow at the title. On the other hand, River had a knowing smirk plastered on his face, the frown long gone. "I guess the system's on my side huh?", you look up at him, no longer distracted by the window as it closes by itself as always. You stare at him with a 'on your side? Please' look. "[Name], get on your knees", you chuckle, "you think I'd just do that? That's ridiculousâ", just as you say those words, your knees give out on you, making you get on your knees infront of River with your phone being dropped on the floor next to you. Infront of his crotch. "You're such a good boy", he smiles with his eyes closed, happy at your obedience, "what just...", "what just happened? My dear angel, have you forgotten I'm the protagonist?", his hand extends to grab a handful of your hair, bending down a bit to meet eye to eye. His eyes intimidating like a predator's. Like someone who already knows the outcome. He stares at your eyes. You feel as if he's staring into your soul, you're terrified of this feeling, of him, of what he's able to do.
"Let go..", you manage to mumble out despite your fear. He tilts his head a bit in satisfaction hearing your weak voice. "Alright then", he lets go of your hair, you look down, trying to calm down from the fear you just experienced when, zippp, you hear a zipping sound coming nor too far from your face. Looking up, you see River already taking his hard-on out. You're once again face to face with his girthy cock. "Angel..Suck it", his eyes full of lust, you could have sworn there were hearts in them. You instinctively reach out for his cock, wrapping your hands around it before letting your lips wrap around his tip, earning a very satisfied huff, "that's it...go down on my cock", he encourages you to shove his dick deeper in your mouth, down your throat. You slowly but surely take more and more of him in your mouth, trying your best to not accidentally choke in the process which grows increasingly hard after a few seconds, you forgot how long he actually is. You look up to see his hand hovering over his mouth incase he accidentally moans too loud. Even if classes have ended for the day, it doesn't mean there aren't students still lurking around. "You can do better than that", he says as you've taken about half of his cock in your mouth. You wanted to throw a snarky comment at him but with your mouth full, you couldn't utter a single word, so you opted to glare at him instead. "A glare won't stop me from doing this", he says as you feel him grab another handful of your hair and making you take all of him in your throat. You choke, whine, and even shed a few tears due to the unexpected choking sensation. You could hear River let out a loud moan. Just you were adjusting, you felt River's grip tighten as he pulls you back until your lips were only touching the tip before pushing you back down, "what a shame Trav isn't here to see you choking on my cock", he smirks before repeating the move over and over again for a few seconds.
"[Name]?", speak of the devil, Trav is finally here. He calls out your name in the hallway. You can hear him so close to you, hindered by a single brick wall. You hear your phone buzzing on the floor, "what a bother..", River sighs, grabbing your phone and turning on do not disturb mode, putting it in his pocket to ensure it stays that way. "He isn't even answering the phone", Trav sighs as his footsteps get closer and closer to the storage room. River only tells you to "keep sucking." Those words alone were enough to make you keep sucking his cock even without him face fucking you. The door to the storage room slowly opens, "oh, River, have you seen [Name]?", the confused man asks, thank God you and River are behind stacks of boxes, Trav is unable to see the way you're sucking River so good. "[Name]? I haven't seen him since class ended, why?", River answers calmly as Trav scratches his head, "really? I could have sworn I heard his phone buzzing around here", he thinks to himself for a moment while River tries to hold in his groans and moans. "What are you doing here anyways?", Trav asks, taking a step into the room which makes you panic a bit hearing his voice get closer. River chuckles at your panicked expression, he then grips your hair to make sure your head stays in place, with all of his length in your mouth, doen your throat. "Please refrain from stepping any closer, I'm tidying up and wouldn't want any dust coming off of you", he smiles softly, admittingly a fake smile, at Trav, causing him to back away. "Oh alright then, don't let me disturb you", he says as he finally walks away, closing the door on his way out.
River turns his attention to you, eyes filled with tears, mouth filled with his cock, you could even taste his precum. You feel a tug at your hair, signaling for you to continue. You try your best to satisfy him, licking and sucking his cock so good. When you look up at him, you see his bored expression, "how do you expect me to cum when you're sucking like that?", he asks, expecting more from you. In order to satisfy himself, he starts to face fuck you, thrusting into your mouth once more, harder and faster this time to chase his climax. You could feel tears rolling down your cheeks, why is he so rough. "Now this...agh..is how to please me", he says in-between moans and breaths. You had a hard time breathing but it'd all be over soon as you could hear River say he's about to cum. "Don't swallow it yet", is what he says before cumming in your mouth, pulling out to see his thick cum overflowing your mouth, spilling a bit on the floor, "open your mouth", he demands which you obey. "Good", your mouth filled with cum, not being able to swallow due to his orders. "You took me so well, you can swallow now", he has a mischievous look on his face, fantasizing about all the things he can and will do to you in this very storage room.
"I've really been holding this in, won't you do more for me? You've been neglecting me these past few days and giving your attention to that pesky man", he refuses to say his name at this very moment in order to not ruin his own mood. Truth be told, Trav got under his skin simply for being around you. "[Name], stand up", your body moves by itself, letting you stand up on both your legs whjch were previously weak beyond belief. With his rough hands, River bends you over on one of the boxes, fortunately, it's stable enough to withstand the force. "You're so pretty, it's no wonder he'd want you", he scans your features and your clothed body, "but you're mine", he proceeds to grab your clothes and rip it into two. You cover yourself with your hands, "what was that for!", he doesn't answer, he only trails his hands down your chest, groping and squeezing your nipples to try and get a reaction out of you, which it does. "Ah..!", you moan out a bit, the sensation painful yet you feel pleasure at the same time. "I'm glad you're still as sensitive as last time we fucked", he turns his attention to your pants which without any hesitation, he pulls down with your boxers along with it leaving you naked. "R-River! We're still in school, what if someone sees, the door can't be locked you know!", you try to salvage what was left of your shirt but River beats you to it and throws them on the ground where you can't reach the pieces. "That's precisely why I want to fuck and mess you up here, angel", he pauses and then continues, "if anyone were to walk in here, they'd know you're fully mine, nobody else's."
With that reminder, he lifts up one of your legs and places it over his shoulder, that way, you cant close your legs even if you wanted to, giving him an easy access to your hole. "We haven't done it in a while, will you even be able to take it all the way in?", his teasing reminds you of all the times the two of you did this sort of act in class without anyone noticing due to whatever magic the system performed. "Damnit, if you're going to fuck me, stop talking and do it already!", you cover your face due to how red it is by now.
River doesn't say a single word. Instead, he uses two fingers to stretch you out, taking you by surprise once more as you moan loudly. God you hope nobody's near this specific hallway, if there is someone, both you and River would be found out. "You like that don't you? To have something of mine in you, you love it. Just wait for my cock to be inside of you", he can't stop the dirty talk when it comes to you.
You can feel his fingers stretching you out, moving around. His fingers are long and knows how to turn you on even more than you already are. You let out a string of moans, the pleasure being unreal. Even after a few minutes, you still writhed in pleasure from his fingers alone.
Your hole suddenly felt weirdly empty, you look at him to see him retracting his fingers. You look on, knowing his cock was going to enter you soon. He guides your hands to wrap around his neck, he positions his cock to be at your entrance and grabs your waist, "I'm not going to go easy on you angel", you swore his pupils were hearts for a second, his lust filled eyes looked into yours. In just a second and without any sort of warning, he thrusts all the way into you, you let out a mixture of a moan and a scream, the pain and pleasure mixing together until you can't form thoughts, all you can do is spill out even more tears. "Hah...all in one go, you're amazing angel", his praises go unnoticed by you due to how your eyes are rolling back from pleasure. Your hands which were once around his neck, scratched his back a bit. Fortunately for River, it did not tear skin. "Be careful there, I'll be leaving campus with blood all over my back if you keep doing that", he joked. Even you knew that he wouldnt mind that kind of thing. Infact, he'd probably love your scratches on him, it's as if you're 'marking' him in some way.
Once you clamed down from the initial shock, he wasted no time and started to thurst in and out of you. Hitting your spots just right as you moan out of pleasure from your academic rival. "Moan out my name angel, I want to hear it", even though you're a mess at this moment, you manage to say his name, "Ri-Riv...ahh...River!", with your shaky voice saying his name, he lets out a very satisfied hum and continues to pound your little hole, abusing it all while you're too weak to do anything about it. You could feel yourself getting closer and closer to your climax. River certainly noticed this. In order to stop you from cumming so fast, he places his thumb over your cock head, you look at him, almost terrified at what he's doing. "You're not going to cum unless I let you, got it?", he's getting back at you for all those times you ditched him for Trav. "We're going to have a long, long day ahead of us."
ËËË ę° âĄ ęą ËËË
Seven.
River has been abusing your hole with his cock for seven rounds. The only reason you know is because River himself kept count. He made sure to count every single round. It doesn't seem like he'll stop either. Both your bodies sweating, dripping with sweat by now. The room became humid, it felt as if the whole world stopped for just the two of you. You lost track of time, your perception of time ruined by how rough River has been fucking you. A minute feels like an hour because of him not letting you rest for even a second. You thought you'd die from pleasure if that was even a possible cause of death. Too much sex? That's one way to die.
With this being the eigth round, colors began to mix together, you lost focus a few rounds ago, only being able to see River's face, feeling the rhythm of his cock going and out of you. "N-no...more...", you somehow manage to mumble out."One more time..Angel", he responds as he's panting heavily, hands still gripping your waist like steel. With one final deep thrust to your prostate, you shiver as your cock releases more cum on your stomach along with River's cum which spilled into your hole once more, you could see a pool of cum on the floor and boxes. "Atta boy..", was all you heard before passing out right then and there.
ËËË ę° âĄ ęą ËËË
When you did awake, you were in River's arms. You look at him and blink a couple of times, covering your mouth as you yawn a bit. "Huh..?", you stare at River's resting face. He looks so peaceful, unlike the River who basically teases the shit out of you for a living. Thinking of it alone made you pissed so you let go of the thought to savor this very moment. You reach out one hand to stroke his hair a few times, his soft fluffy brown hair felt like a cloud. He opened his eyes and smiled at you, "enjoying the view, [Name]?", there he goes going back to his teasing self. You instantly retract your hand, "no", you simply answered and closed your eyes once more. He wouldn't let you avoid him that easily though. "Heyyy look at mee", he pouts, trying to get you to open your eyes with a few soft nudges. You eventually caved in and the two of you met eye to eye. "Angel, you're gorgeous", he says out of the blue, "where did that even come from", you giggle a bit from the sudden compliment, "can't I compliment my boyfriend!?", "boyfriend? We're not even dating yet", you say that but you definitely saw the appeal in it. "Cmonn, admit it, you like me dontcha [Name]?", he has a cheeky smile, he knows he's hard to resist, almost impossible to resist to be very honest. "Is this your way of asking me to be your boyfriend?", "maybeeeee what do you say?", he gets up, using his palm to rest his head as he looks at you, "do you want to be?", you pretend to think about it, "hm, after you've fucked me over 10 times? I don't know..", you respond sarcastically before eventually laughing at your own words, "I assume that's a yes", he laughs too before tackling you and getting on top of you. He leans for a kiss but you suddenly remember something.
"River, why was Trav able to see you..? Plus why was the quest even named after you???", you ask, usually the love quests would make the both of you invisible to others, why was it different that time? And especially the sudden title change??"I'm the protagonist silly, I can do whatever I want with the systemâ oops, cat's out of the bag", he says nonchalantly, "you WHAT!?", you yell in shock, turns out the rumour is real afterall, "ah ah, don't go around telling people this, it wouldn't be as fun if everyone knew", he sighs a bit but you could tell it wasn't all that serious to him.
[System]
Welcome, [Name] [L. Name], after completing the quest, you have been registered as The Protagonist's other half
With the window basically in your face, you read it out loud and get shocked once more, causing you to get up and suddenly lose all feeling in your two legs. Fortunately for you, River caught you in time. "I fucked you real good huh?", he chuckles while you're in his arms basically processing information and the fact you'd probably not be able to go to classes for 3 days because of how rough River fucked you. "River you damn horny bastard!"
Needless to say, River had to carry you around for about 3 days. He doesn't regret it one bit as this showed everyone the two of you are a thing now. Eventually even Trav stayed away from you due to the glares River would throw his way everytime he got close. Whenever someone got close enough to ask what had happened, River would answer in the most brutally honest way he could.
"I fucked him too hard"
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
And it's finally out yall the wait is overđâźď¸ its currently 5AM and I'm posting this lmao
ĂFor a bit of context, reader had always had the role of being River's love interest ever since he slept with River, he only never bothered to check the system roles, however, River and Trav do know that reader's their goal/possible love interest which is why theyre kinda all over reader. Trav is River's love rival which is why he hates it whenever Trav breathes, he wishes he would js drop dead.
#ă by the hands of xin ă#bottom male reader#male reader#oc x reader#oc x male reader#x male reader#lgbtq#mlm#top male character#Xin's River Sterling â
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Tyler Owens x Reader: I Choose You
Request: Anonymous said: "jealous tyler or jealous reader would be interesting to read đ"
Word count: 3.8k
Warnings: none!
A/N: not sure how i feel about this one but I gave it a go and wanted to make sure I posted!
Tyler tells himself that heâs over thinking⌠maybe even reading too much into things.Â
But God, he swears he isnât imagining the way that you and the reporter heâd agreed to let tag along for the next week naturally interact with one another with such ease.Â
Tyler is not a jealous personâ heâs confident and secure and he trusts you. Jealousy is petty and itâs stupid. And Tylerâs been trying his whole life to prove to himself and everyone around him that heâs not stupid.
Tyler has a loose shock to repair before the storm theyâve been tracking rolls in later that day. Heâs currently laying on the dirt at the rest stop theyâve pulled in, with a wrench in his hand. Daniâs shining their flashlight for him, and itâs important he stays focused. And he tries⌠really, he does.Â
But Tyler looks up just as the reporter laughs at a joke youâve made. And then, he reaches out to touch your arm for the added effect. Tyler nearly drops the wrench heâs holding on his face at the sight.Â
âEasy, T,â Dani says, studying him closely.Â
He takes a deep breath before looking back towards the truck.Â
âWhat the hellâs the matter with you?â Dani asks, kicking his shoulder gently with their boot.Â
âNothing,â Tyler grumbles in a tone that screams there is absolutely something wrong. Thankfully Dani doesnât push.Â
âŚ
Throughout the rest of the week, Tyler tries to talk himself down whenever jealousy rears its ugly head. He keeps telling himself that heâs being irrationalâ youâre not flirting with the reporter everytime you walk with him into the gas stations they stop at, or offer to ride with him in the van instead of Tylerâs truck, where you normally sit. Youâre just trying to be friendly⌠make him feel at ease.Â
But did he really have to look at you that way while you studied the GPS monitoring system? Or share his fucking cookies with you when everyone ate lunch in the field? And did you have to laugh so loudly at every single joke he made?
Tyler finds out on the second night heâs tagging along that Henryâs a fucking Columbia grad on top of a stupid self-proclaimed comedian. The two of you are sitting around the fire talking about graduate degrees when Henry turns towards him.Â
âDid you two meet at school then?â Henry asks. Â
Tyler smiles, but instead of warmth itâs laced with sarcasm. âNope, I donât have one of those fancy degrees, Henry. In fact, none of us but her do.âÂ
Henry turns back towards you and proceeds to ask more questions about your time studying meteorology at the U of A. Meanwhile, Tyler is left to simmer in his own self pity, wondering if it bothered you that he isnât educated like Henry.Â
Tyler has to spend the rest of the week fighting the urge to make it known youâre hisâ heâs had thoughts of keeping a permanent hand planted on your waist right in front of Henry. Maybe if he pulled you in for a kiss a little more often, and really claimed you as his, this guy would back the hell off.Â
But Tyler quickly shakes away the thought.Â
Because claiming you like an object is stupid, and Tyler is not stupid.Â
âŚ
Tyler grabs you a coffee from the nearest gas station and brings it back to the motel because heâs really trying to move past all this shit. Youâre sitting with Lilly and fiddling with the drone when he tries to hand it to you.Â
You offer him an appreciative smile that warms his entire chest. Tylerâs definitely been overreacting, because youâre looking at him with such love and admiration in your eyes.Â
âThanks, but Iâve already had some today,â you say, crushing every hope inside of him in an instant. âWhy donât you give it to Dani? They take their coffee the same as I do.â
âWhen did you have time to get coffee?â he asks, trying to play it cool.Â
You reply so simply, like the words donât slice right through his heart. âI didnât, Henry brought me one.â
Tylerâs jaw tightens. Itâs a gesture you donât notice, because youâre too busy focusing on the drone half in your lap.Â
What you do seem to notice, is the way he scoffs. It makes yours and Lillyâs heads both turn.Â
But before you can reply, Tylerâs already walking away. He clutches the coffee firmly in his hand and without a word, drops the full cup in the trash can outside the motel.Â
âŚ
Tyler has to remind himself that heâs not angry.
At least not at you. Â
You and him have a great relationship. He trusts you and thatâs all there is to it. Whether itâs Henry or whoever elseâ you never gave Tyler a reason to be worried.Â
But Tyler doesnât like the way seeing you with the reporter makes him feel. Because at any moment, you could leave him for someone with a more respectable careerâ someone with fair skin and button up polos who just looked like they had their shit together. Someone with a college degree⌠someone a hell of a lot smarter than him.Â
Seeing you with him made Tyler feel vulnerable, like he had something to loseâ because he had everything to lose.Â
âŚ
The crew spends another week chasing in Oklahoma. The seasonâs winding down, but they still managed to catch two EF0s and an EF1.Â
Tylerâs been avoiding you for most of the week. Heâd offer the truck space to Boone and Lilly, heâd sit next to Dexter around the fire at night⌠hell, he would hardly even look at you.Â
You turned down his coffee earlier in the week. Only after the fact did you realize that you should have just taken the damn thing. You understand that rejecting him after he went out of his way to do something nice for you hurt his feelings⌠But you canât understand how that turned into an entire week of the silent treatment.Â
On numerous instances, you try to approach him. But he always has somewhere to run off to.Â
âI gotta help Dani with the vanâs oil change.â
âI gotta see if Boone got the footage we need.â
âI gotta give Dexter a hand with the radar.â
Youâre getting sick of it.Â
You try to distract yourself for the rest of the weekâ you ask Lilly to explain more about how to work her drone, you keep on top of the radarâ looking for forming storm cells, and you try to make the reporter Tyler had invited along for the week feel welcome.Â
Henryâs niceâ heâs completely new to storm chasing and has loads of questions all the time. You find it slightly annoying that heâs so interested in Tyler⌠but you get it. And even though youâre a little irritated with Tyler for your week-long silent-treatment sentence, you still want him to sound as good as possible in the article, so you talk him up every chance you can.Â
You know that this lack of communication canât last. And the second Henry goes back to Boston to write his piece, you plan to corner Tyler and force him into telling you what the hell youâd done wrong. But until then, you donât want to cause a scene. So, you sit back, spend more time talking with Henry about Tyler, and try like hell not to lose your mind.
âŚ
Itâs more for his own sanity than anything. Itâs like seeing you with Henry has caused this sudden realization to pop into his head⌠You can do betterâ and honestly you deserve better than him. The thought is all consuming. It makes focusing on anything else incredibly difficult.Â
âYou gonna tell us what the hell is up?â Lilly asks one day.Â
Tylerâs currently standing in the bed of his truck, tinkering things that didnât really need to be fixed just to stay busy.Â
âWhat do you mean?â he replies without looking up.
âI mean are you going to tell us why you two love birds havenât spoken in like three days?â
Out of the corner of his eye, Tyler notices Boone glancing his way with an expression on his face that says he was wondering the same thing.Â
âWeâve spoken,â Tyler says dismissively.Â
âTelling her you donât have room for her in the truck doesnât count,â Lilly retorts. âCâmon, seriously, Ty. Whatâs wrong?â
Tyler sets his tool down and looks down at Lilly. âNothing is wrong.â
Lilly rolled her eyes. âOkay, well are you sure she knows that? Cause Dani and I saw her crying in the bathroom.âÂ
Tyler lets out a long exhaleâ the thought of you upset instantly filling his insides with sorrow. But the thought that he was the one to make you upset is even worse.Â
âI know itâs not my business,â Lilly adds. âBut Iâve been watching you give her the silent treatment all week, and thatâs not going to fix anything. I know Henryâs still here and itâs been a crazy weekââ
Tyler canât help the scoff that escapes his lips at the mention of Henryâs name.
Lilly pauses before a look of understanding washes over her. âYouâre pissed that sheâs been hanging with Henry.â She says it as a statement instead of a question.Â
âIâm notââ
âIâve known you for six years, donât even try to deny it. You areâ youâre jealous, arenât you?âÂ
With his lips pursed in a thin line, Tyler raises an eyebrow at her. âMaybe I am. Does that make you happy? Is that what you want to hear?â
Now it was Lillyâs turn to scoff. âOf course it doesnât make me happy. Youâre being an idiot.â
âWhat?âÂ
âI said that youâre being an idiot,â Lilly says, annunciating each word insultingly.Â
âYeah,â Tyler nods. âIâm well aware that Iâm an idiot, but thanks for reminding me.â
âI said youâre being an idiot, Tyler. Not that you are one. Now stop sulking and fucking listen for once in your goddamn life.â
Itâs so out of the ordinary for Lilly to snap that Tyler actually does shut his mouth.Â
âYou invite a reporter on the road with us and then you donât give him the time of day to answer any of the questions he has. Youâre short and curt and to be honest, kind of fucking rude anytime he asks you anything. Y/N is being politeâ and sheâs hosting the guest you invited along. So donât fucking blame her just because youâre insecure.âÂ
Tyler can feel the anger rising in his own chest, he wants to get defensiveâ to snap back at Lilly. But deep down, he knows sheâs right, so he stifles any comebacks and instead hangs his head.Â
Lilly sighs. âYouâre not an idiot, Tyler. So stop acting like one.â
âŚ
After letting Lillyâs words really sink in, Tyler decides that sheâs right. For the first time all week, heâs motivated to actually talk with you and make things right.Â
Or at least he is right until he sees Henry approaching you in the parking lot. Heâs too far away to hear what Henry has to say. But heâs not so far away that he doesn't see the folded up piece of paper that he passes you.Â
In an instant, everything Lilly had saidâ along with all the things heâs said to convince himself heâs been overreacting flies away with the wind. Because Henry just gave you his fucking phone number.Â
Tyler turnsâ needing to get as much space from whatever exchange he just witnessed as he possibly can. In a few, long, angry strides, Tyler reaches his truck and climbs inside. In the distance, he hears Lilly call after him. But he pretends he doesnât hear. Instead, he slams the door shut, starts the ignition and drives away.Â
âŚ
âWhereâs he goinâ?â Boone says just as you approach him and the rest of the crew.Â
âDunno. He didnât say anything to you?â Dani asks, turning towards Lilly.Â
She shakes her head, eyes squinting against the bright sun.Â
âWhat the hell is his problem?â you say frustratedly, biting back tears.Â
Stupidly, youâd let yourself get your hopes up earlier in the day when Tyler had offered you a small smile over breakfast. You had thought that maybe things were alright, and that he was finally over whatever had been bothering him so badly.Â
But now youâre standing in the cloud of dust he just left behind after taking off in his truck without a word to anyone and you know that isnât the case.Â
âHere I was thinking I helped last night,â Lilly says under her breath.Â
You snap your head in her direction. âYou talked to him?â
She shrugs. âI tried to.âÂ
âDid he say why heâs been so upset?â
Lilly hesitates. And truthfully, you understand why. Everyone here was Tylerâs friend first. You were the last to join the crewâ inducted into the group just by being Tylerâs girlfriend. They have no obligation to be loyal to you over Tyler.Â
âForget it,â you say defeatedly, turning away as soon as you feel the familiar burn of tears behind your eyes. âIt doesnât even matter.â With that, you make your way towards the RV, painfully aware of everyoneâs eyes trained on you the entire way.Â
âŚ
Tyler drives to the nearest gas station, desperate for space to clear his head.Â
He knows heâs being dramatic and irrational at this point, but if he stayed at that rest stop another second, he didnât know what would come out of his mouth. He really really had to get it together. But he canât escape the fear inside of himâ the one saying that meeting Henry helped you recognize that you could do so much better than him.
And now you had his phone number, to reach out whenever that realization hit.Â
Why wouldnât you be interested in Henry? Heâs got a goddamn masterâs degree from Columbia, he writes articles for the Globe, works out every morning before they go chasingâ apparently makes hilarious jokesâŚÂ
Tyler rests his forehead against the steering wheel and groans.
âŚ
Tylerâs gone for an hour. But when he finally parks the truck back at the rest stop, he hasnât shaken the sinking feeling inside of him.Â
In a preemptive attempt to avoid questions he had snagged a bunch of snacks from the nearest gas station. If you ask where heâs been, he can just say he had a hankering for potato chips and call it good.Â
Except, you donât even look at him when he gets out of the truck. Booneâs got corn hole set up in the dirt. It looks like Boone and Henry versus Dani and Dexter while you watch. He only watches for a moment before bringing the bag of snacks into the RV.Â
Secretly, Tylerâs been simultaneously excited for and dreading the end of the week. Heâs excited for Henry to leave and excited to sleep in his own bed. But heâs dreading being back in your shared house. Itâll be the first time the two of you are forced to be alone, and he knows heâll have to find the words to describe what heâs been feeling.Â
But apparently Tylerâs stupid, because he doesnât even know what heâs feeling.Â
All he knows is that he doesnât want to lose you. And seeing you with Henry makes him feel like heâs about to lose you. Tyler doesnât know how to say that to you without coming across as a total lunatic. Â
âŚ
You donât want to cause a scene at the rest stop. But the minute you see Tyler head for the RV, youâre out of your seat and beelining it towards him while the rest of the team is distracted.
As soon as you hoist open the door, you find him hunched over the fridge, grabbing a water bottle.Â
âWhat the hell?â is all you can manage to blurt out. Youâre fuming and on the verge of tears. But you canât help itâ Tylerâs silent treatment has just about pushed you to the edge.Â
Tyler whips around at the sound of your entrance⌠and maybe it was a little dramaticâ but you need to get your point across.Â
Thereâs a long pause while Tylerâs eyes study you.Â
âAre you gonna tell me why youâve been avoiding me all week?â
Youâre met by more silence. Â
âThis is ridiculous, Tyler. Will you just talk to me?â
Finally, Tyler scoffs, âThe reporter gave you his number, right? Why donât you talk to him? Iâm sure heâd love to talk.â
In an instant, a wave of understanding washes over you. But it isnât overshadowed by the anger you feel.Â
âAre you serious right now? Youâre jealous of Henry?â
He shuts the fridge before cracking open his water bottle dismissively, ignoring your questions.Â
âTyler, are you forgetting that youâre the one who invited him with us this week? I mean, did you think he was just supposed to sit back and observe? Heâs a reporter, of course heâs going to have questions⌠Questions that you were way more qualified to answer, but you were too busy being a jerk all week to answer any of them. So I did it for youââ
âI never asked for you to do that.â
âYou didnât have toâ I did it for you!â you cry. âI did it so that heâd write you a good storyâ because you deserve that.âÂ
âOh, how convenient. So you two just get along so well for my sake then?â he says.Â
You exhale sharply. âAre you kidding me right now? Weâve spent the last week talking about you! Iâve been talking you upâ telling him stories about what you doâ how good you are at what you doâ all the people youâve helpedââ
Tyler rolls his eyes. âYeah right,â he scoffs.Â
You pause, anger slowly melting away at the realization that he genuinely didnât believe anything you were saying.Â
âTyler,â you say seriously. âThere is absolutely nothing going on between me and Henry. Iâve been answering his questions and telling him how fucking brave and generous and smart you areââ
âDonât patronize me,â he snaps, voice cracking just slightly. âJust forget it, it doesnât matter.â He sets his water bottle on the counter before moving to step by you.Â
âTyler stopââ you say, reaching for him. But heâs too quick. He reaches the door before youâre able to stop him.Â
âWill you please stop walking away from me!â you blurt out frustratedly, tears forming in your eyes. âYouâve been running from me all weekâ I just⌠I just want to talk about this. Pleaseââ
Tyler doesnât turn to face you, but to your relief, he stops before opening the door.Â
âThere is nothing happening between me and Henry, Tyler. I mean, I promise you, absolutely nothingâ I⌠I donât know how else to convince you. But thereâs nothing going on. Iâm not into Henryââ
âI know,â he says quickly, eyes squeezing shut.Â
You let your mouth fall open, confusion washing over you. âWhat?âÂ
âI know thereâs nothing happening between you and Henryâ I trust you and I believe you.â
You shake your head in disbelief. âSo why are you so mad at me?â
Tyler pauses and bites his lip before saying, âIâm not mad at youââ he tries to explain. âI just⌠I donât understand.â
âUnderstand what?â
âI donât understand whyââ
You sigh. âTyler, youâre not making any senseââ
Tylerâs face twists in anguish. âWhy arenât you into him?â
âWhat are you talking about?â
âHeâs everything Iâm not. And I meanâ Seeing you with himâ it just made me realize that you can do so much better than me,â Tyler says desperately, the pain almost palpable in his voice. âHeâs got the fancy degreeâ heâs obviously smartââ
Youâre shaking your head before he even finishes his sentence, because the idea of anyone ever being better than Tyler was even more ludicrous than him being jealous in the first place. âTyler, youâre smartââ
âI didnât go to Columbia. I didnât even finish my first year of undergrad.â
âI donât care about any of thatâ you know I donâtââ
âWhy?â he blurts out harshly, finally turning to look at you. âWhy do you even want me when you can have someone like him?â
Tyler didnât think he was good enough for youâ and that admission broke your fucking heart. In an instant, all the reasons you loved Tyler flow through your head. Thereâs so many, you canât even keep up.Â
So instead, you reach into your pocket and pull out the note Henry had given you just hours earlierâ the one Tyler apparently saw him give you. He watches as you unfold the piece of paper, quickly revealing that itâs not a phone number.Â
âItâs his momâs cookie recipe,â you explain. âThe ones you refused to try. I talked to him about how you have a sweet tooth, and I said how much you love chocolate chip cookies, so he wrote it down for me. I thought I might be able to make them for you when we got home. Because I love youâ and I love doing things that will make you happy. Because thatâs what you do for meâ you make me happy. All the time, just by existing.â
You watch as the realization washes over him. Â
You sigh. âDid you ever stop and think about how I feel the same about you?â
He pauses before looking at you questioningly.Â
âI mean, youâre you,â you say, gesturing towards him. âPeople adore you, Tyler. And rightfully soâ but Iâm always worried youâll find someone better. But I donât get hung up on it, because I trust you. I trust that you mean it when you tell me you love me and you choose me. And I need you to do the same for me, Tyler. I need you to trust me. Because I love youâ and I always will.â
Tyler exhales, his eyes watery.Â
âCan you do that?â you plead.Â
To your relief, after a moment, he nods.Â
You donât hesitate before closing the gap between you and wrapping your arms around his middle. You lay your head on his chest just as his arms wind around your shoulders in an attempt to make up for all the hugs youâve missed out on this week. Because as much as you love chasing in Oklahoma or Texas, your absolute favorite place to be is at home in his arms.Â
âCookie recipe, huh?â he muses above you, chin resting on top of your heads.Â
You nod. âIâm a horrible baker, but I was going to give it a shot.â
Tyler tightens his grip around you. âWell horrible baker or not, I love you and I choose you.â
You let your eyes fall shut and inhale the familiar, comforting scent of him. âYou have no idea how happy that makes me,â you say honestly.Â
#tyler owens x reader#tyler owens fic#tyler owens imagine#tyler owens fanfiction#tyler owens x reader fic#tyler owens x reader imagine#twisters imagine#twisters fanfic#twisters fic
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Deadball
Deadball Second Edition is a platinum bestseller on DrivethruRPG. This means it's in the top 2% of all products on the site. Its back cover has an endorsement from Sports Illustrated Kids.
It's also not an rpg I'd heard about until I discovered all of these facts one after another.
I was raised in a profoundly anti-sports household. My father would say stuff like "sports is for people who can't think" and "there's no point in exercising, everything in your body goes away eventually." So I didn't learn really any of the rules of the more popular American sports until I was in my mid twenties, and I've been to two ballgames in my life. I appreciate the enthusiasm that people have for sports, but it's in the same way that I appreciate anyone talking about their specific fandom.
One of the things that struck me reading Deadball was its sense of reverence for the sport. Its language isn't flowery. It's plain and technical and smart. But its love for baseball radiates off of the pages. Not like a blind adoration. But like when a dog sits with you on the porch.
For folks familiar with indie rpgs, there's a tone throughout the book that feels OSR. Deadball doesn't claim to be a precise simulation or a baseball wargame or anything like that---instead it lays out a bunch of rules and then encourages you to treat them like a recipe, adjusting to your taste. And it does this *while* being a detailed simulation that skirts the line of wargaming, which is an extremely OSR thing to do.
For folks not familiar with baseball, Deadball starts off assuming you know nothing and it explains the core rules of the sport before trying to pin dice and mechanics onto anything. It also explains baseball notation (which I was not able to decipher) and it uses this notation to track a play-by-play report of each game. Following this is an example of play and---in a move I think more rpgs should steal from---it has you play out a few rounds of this example of play. Again, this is all before it's really had a section explaining its rules.
In terms of characters and stats, Deadball is a detailed game. You can play modern or early 1900s baseball, and players can be of any gender on the same team, so there's a sort of alt history flavor to the whole experience, but there's also an intricate dice roll for every at bat and a full list of complex baseball feats that any character can have alongside their normal baseball stats. Plus there's a full table for oddities (things not normally covered by the rules of baseball, such as a raccoon straying onto the field and attacking a pitcher,) and a whole fatigue system for pitchers that contributes a strong sense of momentum to the game.
Deadball is also as much about franchises as it is about individual games, and you can also scout players, trade players, track injuries, track aging, appoint managers of different temperaments, rest pitchers in between games, etc.
For fans of specific athletes, Deadball includes rules for creating players, for playing in different eras, for adapting historical greats into one massively achronological superteam, and for playing through two different campaigns---one in a 2020s that wasn't and one in the 1910s.
There's also thankfully a simplified single roll you can use to abstract an entire game, allowing you to speed through seasons and potentially take a franchise far into the future. Finances and concession sales and things like that aren't tracked, but Deadball has already had a few expansions and a second edition, so this might be its next frontier.
Overall, my takeaway from Deadball is that it's a heck of a game. It's a remarkably detailed single or multiplayer simulation that I think might work really well for play-by-post (you could get a few friends to form a league and have a whole discord about it,) and it could certainly be used to generate some Blaseball if you start tweaking the rules as you play and never stop.
It's also an interesting read from a purely rpg design perspective. Deadball recognizes that its rules have the potential to be a little overbearing and so it puts in lots of little checks against that. It also keeps its more complex systems from sprawling out of control by trying to pack as much information as possible into a single dice roll.
For someone like me who has zero background in baseball, I don't think I'd properly play Deadball unless I had a bunch of friends who were into it and I could ride along with that enthusiasm. However as a designer I like the book a lot, and I'm putting it on my shelf of rpgs that have been formative for me, alongside Into The Odd, Monsterhearts, Mausritter, and Transit.
#ttrpg#ttrpg homebrew#ttrpgs#ttrpg design#indie ttrpgs#rpg#tabletop#indie ttrpg#dnd#rpgs#baseball#fantasy baseball#deadball
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on second thought | jww
(where your roommate, wonwoo, has an interesting solution to all your bad dates. nothing can go wrong with two friends crossing a line, can it?)
pairing: wonwoo x f.reader genre: roommates/friends to fwb to?? | smut, tiny bit of angst if you squint rating: explicit, 18+ minors dni word count: 6.5k warnings: there's some plot here but it's mostly smut, multiple sex scenes (some quickly referenced), roommates who enter a fwb agreement, kissing, fingering, oral (f. receiving), protected sex, multiple orgasms, use of actual lube, some scratching, after care, mentions: masturbation, kitchen sex, teasing, overstimulation, edging, i think that's it.
authors note: happy birthday to my bby @wongyuseokie! i'm thankful to have met you through nets. i hope you like some wonwoo to celebrate. thank you to @wonwussy for helping me with a title, you're a savior. this is unedited because i only started it yesterday so sorry in advance. also tagging: @aaniag @gyuminusone
Another disappointing date. Another man who couldnât even seem to let you finish a sentence. Was so intent on proving how well he could provide for you that he forgot to treat you like a person. So intent on establishing his dominance that he tried to order for you at the overpriced restaurant with too-small portions. So irritated that he paid for your dinner and drinks only for you to leave separately from him and refuse his offer to drive you home. There was no way you were letting that man know where you lived. Is it really asking too much just to have a decent date? You arenât going to let anyone try to tell you that your standards are too high. Youâre really just asking for the bare minimum.Â
Thatâs why youâre sitting on the counter in the kitchen of your shared apartment, spilling your guts to your sympathetic roommate. His hair is messy, sticking up at odd angles in some places because heâs been playing video games for hours. Probably streaming at some point. You admire that heâs able to do something he loves to fill up most of his days. He pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose and you try not to find it so endearing. But, you fail at that. He really is impossibly cute sometimes.
âDo you want a bite of this?â you ask instead, holding out the instant ramen you made as soon as you got home.Â
âNo, I ate earlier,â he answers.Â
âAn actual meal or a Wonwoo meal?â you challenge and he rolls his eyes.
âI ate real food. Go back to bitching about your date,â Wonwoo says.Â
âI donât know, maybe I was being too harsh,â you say.Â
âHe sounds like a fucking nightmare,â he disagrees.Â
âUgh, maybe I just need to redownload one of those apps,â you whine. Wonwoo raises an eyebrow at you. âDonât look at me like that. I hate fucking on the first date, but Iâm so pent up that I need to release it somehow. Iâm going insane.âÂ
This makes him laugh, at least. It releases a little bit of the tension, too. Youâve lived with Wonwoo nearly three years and were friends for years before that. Nothing is secret between the two of you. Not anymore. The first time you realized he caught you getting off in your room because you didnât think he was home was mortifying. Even if he didnât seem to think it was a big deal. After you got over it, things settled. And in the time since, youâve both heard the other doing a lot of things. Some of your friends think itâs weird, but you just chalk it up to the comfort of living with someone. After all, you would tell your female friends all about your sex life. Why was that weird to share with Wonwoo?Â
âToys not doing it for you?â he throws out. You only fix him with a glare. Itâs more proof that youâre entirely too comfortable.
âOur walls are thin, what do you think?â you answer.Â
Wonwoo snorts a little before seeming to consider something. âWhy donât we just fuck? Get it out of your system.âÂ
The sip of water youâre taking when he suggests that comes bursting out of your mouth. A real life spit take. Thankfully, heâs out of the blast zone. He looks unamused at water coming out of your mouth, but he doesnât look like he was kidding. It can be so hard to tell with him. You think that you know his face well after all these years. But, you never thought youâd hear that coming out of his mouth, so youâre not sure.Â
âPlease give me some indication if that was a joke or not,â you say.
âIt wasnât a joke,â he says.
âPretty clear indicator,â you mumble.Â
âIs it that crazy? You think Iâm hotâŚâ Wonwoo starts. If you were still drinking, youâd spit out your water again.
âUh, what?â you ask.
âYou think Iâm hot. Hao told me,â he says as if itâs no big deal. Youâre mentally running through what the appropriate payback is for this breach of trust. âItâs fine. He told me because I was saying I also think youâre hot.âÂ
âI mean, thanks,â you laugh, still considering how youâre going to torture Minghao. âBut, we canât have sex.âÂ
âWhy not?â Wonwoo presses.Â
âBecause weâre roommates?â you ask like itâs obvious.Â
âSo I can hear you fuck yourself with a toy or hear you fake an orgasm with another bad date, but us fucking each other is the line?â Wonwoo asks.Â
âI donât fake that many orgasms,â you scoff to buy time.
âYes, you do,â he argues. âI can hear the difference. And Iâm pretty sure you wouldnât be faking it with me.âÂ
Thereâs a little bit of cockiness in the statement that shouldnât be doing anything for you. But, it is. Thereâs also the very real possibility that Wonwoo does know the difference in the sounds you make. Itâs not like youâve bothered being that quiet since the first conversation where he heard you. Whatâs the point? The walls are pretty thin and youâre both adults. Itâs not like youâre going to kick him out every time you bring a date home. And youâre definitely not going to only get off in the shower because it drives up the water bill.Â
Beyond any of it, thereâs also a little curiosity. Wonwoo is insanely attractive. Someone would have to be blind to miss that. Heâs got that whole nerdy thing going on for him on initial inspection with the glasses and gaming. Or thereâs the fact that heâs content to just hang out around the house, even with company over, wearing his pimple patches. But then, thereâs this whole other side to him. It comes out when youâre both out with friends and he leaves the glasses behind. Swapping out graphic tees or hoodies for form fitting clothing and leather jackets. Casually leaning against a bar and whispering honey into some nameless, faceless strangerâs ear.Â
And that leads you to the reason youâre actually curious. Sure, heâs heard you having sex with people youâve been dating or just someone you brought home for the night. But, youâve heard him too. If any of your orgasms sound faked, the ones he coaxes from the pretty girls in his bed sound anything but. Thereâs nearly always an incoherent string of praises. That thought alone has you considering his proposition. It has you shifting a little on the counter.
âLetâs pretend for a second that Iâm considering this,â you start and he smiles.Â
âPretend, sure,â he echoes.Â
âWeâd need ground rules, right? Like we donât want this to get awkward,â you say.
âItâs not gonna be awkward. But, we can set whatever makes you feel comfortable,â he says nonchalantly.Â
A very strong, very hard to ignore voice in the back of your head argues against setting rules at all. Actually urges you to just drag him into your bedroom. Or his bedroom? Maybe you do need some ground rules.Â
So, you talk. You donât say that itâs only going to happen once because you never know what needs might pop up. The most important thing that you agree to is that nothing can change between the two of you. If either of you feels like itâs going to, then you have to talk about it because preserving the friendship is most important. It doesnât matter what bed you have sex in as long as the other helps clean anything up. Youâre not planning on this being a regular thing, so you donât need to negotiate any kinks or anything like that. If it does become more of a thing, then you can revisit the kinks. There wonât be any weirdness about dating or talking to other people. This is just a solution between two friends that are both going through dating dry spells.Â
Once the rules are set out, Wonwoo brings you into his room. Even though youâve been in here more times than you could ever count, it feels different now. He tells you to make yourself comfortable on his bed. When he turns around to take his shirt off and toss it aside, your eyes map out his back. And, yeah, youâve seen Wonwoo shirtless before, but never given yourself permission to so openly appreciate his body. His shoulders are impossibly wide and heâs in deceptively good shape for someone that hides under baggier clothes.Â
âShould I take a picture for you?â he asks. Itâs only then that you realize that heâs facing you.Â
âFunny,â you say with an eye roll.Â
Wonwoo crosses the space to his bed and settles next to you. The way he reaches out to pull your face into his own is so smooth. His lips are on yours before your brain has a chance to catch up. You gasp a little and pull back.
âWhat are you doing?â you ask.
âUh, didnât we just go over this?â he asks.
âNo, I mean, weâre kissing?â you ask.
âWhat am I supposed to do, sweetheart, just get right down to fucking you without foreplay?â he asks.
You feel a little stupid for asking that because of course you donât want to skip the foreplay. Itâs just that you donât want to force it, either.Â
âJust let me take care of you,â Wonwoo says to keep you from overthinking anything.Â
Itâs not something that you expected to be doing. Giving up control to Wonwoo. But, itâs surprisingly easy when he starts kissing you again. Any thoughts that this might be weird fly right out of your head as soon as he deepens the kiss. Instead, your focus is on what a good kisser he is. The way his lips mold effortlessly to yours. The way his tongue licks into your mouth. The way his hands roam your body as if theyâre trying to memorize every curve.Â
Youâre breathless by the time Wonwoo pulls back from you to pull your shirt over your head. When you changed after the date from hell, you hadnât considered putting anything nice on. Hadnât bothered to keep your bra on. What was the point when you were just going to be going to bed after having something to eat? Now, youâre wondering about that decision. Because your very hot roommate is drinking in the sight of you. Itâs making you a little self-conscious, the way his eyes move over your body.
âFuck, youâre beautiful,â he utters.Â
Itâs a little too intimate for you to respond to. It doesnât seem to matter, anyway. Wonwoo starts kissing down your neck and working his way to your breasts. He spreads his kisses between them, rolling your nipple between his fingers when his mouth is on your other breast. Thereâs something so consuming about the way he kisses your body, like heâs worshiping you. Like this is a lot more than roommates helping each other out.Â
He works his way further down your body, kissing along your stomach, stopping at the waist band to your shorts. Thankfully, he doesnât give you the chance to overthink here either before he pulls the shorts and underwear down your legs. Tosses them off to the side for good measure. Youâre totally naked in front of someone you find you do actually trust. And someone that, yeah, maybe youâve thought about fucking before. There was no reality where you thought it would happen, though. Even if it does make a lot of sense. Every part of you truly does feel safe with him. He knows you better than most people in your life. Which clearly translates to this part of you.Â
Since youâre so comfortable, youâre finding it easier to not be embarrassed at the way heâs got you squirming under the barest touch. The way he ghosts his breath across your center makes you let out a whine. Itâs unfair, the way that he wants to take his time like this. Itâs also unfair that heâs the first person to ever make your mind go this blank during sex. Nothing exists to you outside of this moment and this man.
Wonwoo moves back to where you need him the most, blows gently against your center. The sensation sends a shiver down your body. You barely hear him mumble out a âso prettyâ before he flattens his tongue and licks a stripe up your core. Thereâs just enough time to think this slow pace might actually be the death of you before he goes back in. Using his fingers to spread you apart, he starts tonguing your pussy. A mix of slow and deliberate movements with faster ones. His thumb circles your clit before his mouth moves up there to give it the attention it needs.Â
With his mouth on your clit, he presses one finger into your pussy. Youâve never really thought much about his hands and now youâre wondering how you missed them. His long finger pumps in and out of you quickly. It seems that heâs reading your body and can tell that you donât want something too slow. Thereâs so much pent up in you.
âFuck, please, Wonwoo. I need another finger,â you whine.Â
âAnything you want,â he mumbles into your pussy.Â
He slides another finger inside of you and it makes you clench around him. That only seems to make him move faster. His mouth continues to work along with his fingers and your hands grip whatever they can reach. Youâre a babbling mess and you suddenly understand what you overheard from Wonwooâs room. Thereâs something so hot about knowing heâs this good with his mouth and his hands. Itâs got you coming hard on his face. Harder than you can remember coming before.Â
âThatâs my girl,â he praises as soon as youâre coming down from your high. Your hazy brain doesnât latch onto it the way it clearly should.
He presses a gentle kiss to your inner thing and then pulls himself up to lie next to you. His fingers trace patterns into your skin while heâs waiting for your breathing to come back to normal.Â
âJesus, I guess I know why I always heard so much praise through the wall,â you mutter.Â
âNone as pretty as the sounds you just made,â he says quietly. Itâs so gentle, so intimate. Thereâs a lot of love between you and one of your closest friends, so you donât dwell too much on it.
You turn your head to face him. His eyes are still dark with desire, fingers still keeping contact with your body. Thereâs like some kind of bubble around the two of you where nothing else exists. Itâs a comfortable feeling, even in the quiet. Something pulls you in closer to him and you can feel his erection brush against your leg.
âOh,â you say quietly. âYou know, Iâm still a bit pent upâŚâ
âAre you sure?â he asks.Â
âWhat? Iâm gonna come on your face but we canât actually fuck like we meant to?â you joke, a little braver than you feel.Â
âThis was about you, not about me,â he says simply.Â
âIt can be about both of us,â you say, hand running down his stomach. He tenses a bit under your touch and itâs unfair. Heâs got perfect abs and you kind of hate it. Kind of hate that itâs so hot to you, too.Â
You run your hand over the outline of his dick threw his shorts, enjoy the sharp intake of breath at the contact. It feels like a sign for you to keep going. But, he grabs your hand and pins it above your head. Kisses you hard and desperate. All of his restraint from before seems to be gone now.Â
âDonât play with me, sweetheart,â he warns.Â
âThen show me how good you can fuck me. You were so sure earlier,â you press back.Â
Wonwoo rolls over and pulls his shorts and boxers off. Casts them off to the side with your clothing. He reaches into his nightstand and pulls a condom out. He rolls back over to position himself between your legs.Â
âOne final time, are you sure?â he asks. Itâs the first time since you came into his room that youâve seen him look unsure.
âAs long as youâre sure too, yes. I need this Nu, please,â you say, a little breathy with desire.Â
âI love it when you call me that,â he admits.Â
With your go ahead, he slides his tip along your entrance. You know youâre still wet from his hard work, but he still reaches into the dresser again. He pulls out some lube and runs it along his cock. Once heâs done that, he puts the cap back on and tosses it aside. He presses his tip against you again and this time slides in, slowly. Gives you a chance to adjust.Â
Youâre completely at Wonwooâs mercy like this, with his arms on either side of you like heâs caging you in. Instead of wanting to get out, you can only think that you wouldnât want to be anywhere else. Your hands find their way to his arms, gripping him tightly as he bottoms out in you.Â
âFuck, you feel so good,â he hisses.Â
âNu, fuck, please move,â you beg.Â
âGive me a second, sweetheart, Iâm trying to adjust so it doesnât end too fast,â he says, voice so impossibly deep.Â
âPlease,â you beg again.Â
âFuck,â he whispers.Â
It finally does get him to move though, barely pulling out at all and fucking slowly into you, so deep. Heâs filling you up in the most perfect way. Your nails dig into his arms, but you canât help it. He doesnât seem to mind. If anything, it spurs him on. Makes him pull nearly all the way out of you before snapping hard into you again. He repositions one of your legs so that he can reach a different angle. With each hard thrust, his dick hits exactly where you need him to be. The rhythm is fast, which is really everything you need for how stressed youâve been feeling. Each thrust uncoils more of the tension in your body. Each moan seems to spur him on more.Â
When he leans down to kiss you, itâs messy. A clash of tongues and lips and teeth and need, so much need. Your hands find purchase anywhere on his body they can, even as his own arms seem to be a little shaky. So, you pull him down on top of you, bodies pressed tight as he continues fucking you. Youâre still so sensitive from the first orgasm that youâre building up entirely too quickly. Even though you wanted it fast like this, youâre a little sorry to think it might be almost over.Â
Wonwoo must feel that youâre close by the way youâre clenching around him and begging for him to give you everything. He pushes himself up a little, just creates the tiniest amount of space between your bodies, and you miss it a little. Miss the feeling of skin on skin. But, heâs only doing it so that he can circle your clit. He just wants to take care of all that tension. You give control over to him completely. Let him set the pace. An embarrassingly short time later, youâre coming for the second time. He removes his hand but still fucks you through the high.Â
When your body stops shaking, you realize that heâs stilled inside you. Heâs barely even moving as he looks down at you.
âItâs okay, Nu, Iâm not that sensitive yet,â you assure him
âThank fuck,â he whispers.Â
His pace is fast and you reach up to run your nails down his back. That seems to get him like nothing else does. When you do it a second time, he hisses out and you know he likes it. Each time your nails find a new part of his skin, his thrusts stutter. You clench your pussy around his cock and thatâs all he can handle. Heâs coming undone.Â
You return the favor through his high, lightly keeping the rhythm going and helping him settle his weight on top of you. His breathing is still heavy when he meets your eyes and gives you the gentlest kiss. Slowly, he slides out of you and rolls over. The next second, heâs up to dispose of the condom. He disappears into the bathroom and returns with a wet washcloth a few moments later, sitting on the edge of the bed to help you.
âWell, I guess I learned one thing,â you say when he gets up to take the washcloth back to the bathroom.
âWhatâs that?â he calls over his shoulder.
âAll that confidence was definitely warranted,â you say through a light laugh.Â
You can just feel him rolling his eyes. âAnd here I thought youâd have less to say after a good fuck.âÂ
âNope, chatty as ever. No more tension, though,â you say.Â
âIâm glad,â he says, but it looks like he actually means it.
You move to get out of the bed and look at the sheets. Probably in need of a change. âHey, do you wanna throw these in the hamper and just sleep in my bed tonight?âÂ
âAre you sure that doesnât break any rules?â he asks.
âNo, weâve done itâŚare you teasing me?â Your question morphs in the middle when you catch sight of his face. He can be such a shit for someone who acts like heâs chill all the time.Â
âI would never tease you,â he says, faux seriousness lacing his voice.
âThatâs a shame, I like being teased,â you toss back.
âIâll remember that for next time,â he shrugs.
âNext time?â you wonder.
âJust go get in your bed, Iâll be there in a minute,â he says.Â
It wasnât like you agreed for sex with Wonwoo to be a one time thing. That felt like putting too many rules in place. Still, youâre not expecting it to happen again quite so quickly. You also genuinely didnât realize he was home when you pulled out your vibrator. But, he was home and he barged into your room without knocking, pulled you to the edge of your bed, and fucked you hard. Made you wonder why youâd ever even consider using your vibe in the first place.Â
The next time comes after another failed date. It kind of seemed like that was the recipe. Something goes wrong or youâre pent up and heâs there to let you use him. Although, heâs really using you just as much. You like to let him be a little rough with you. Thereâs something satisfying in the way he doesnât treat you like heâs going to break you. Itâs unquestionably the best sex youâve ever had, but thatâs your business. You donât need to share that with the class. You do figure that it might be time to talk about some kinks and boundaries, though. It would be good to be on the same page.Â
That seems to be how it goes for a while, at least. Itâs mostly you needing something, Wonwoo being able to sense that, and helping you out. It doesnât seem to ever start from him being the one to need something. He doesnât even seem to be going out and bringing people home so much anymore. Not that youâre keeping track, you just canât remember the last time he did. Or maybe heâs trying to only bring someone home when youâre not around.Â
He definitely holds true to his promise to tease you. One night, after a really long week at work with a lot of little things going wrong, he asks if he can take his time with you. In hindsight, you should have known it meant that it was going to mean teasing. But, you agreed anyway, and let him set the pace. Instead of hard and fast, he takes everything slow. He brings you right to the edge over and over again without letting you have your release. Itâs insane how well he seems to read your signs. It seems like he can tell youâre close before you can. That night, it feels like it goes on for hours before he finally lets you come. Itâs the biggest mess youâve ever made. A fact that you would be embarrassed about if Wonwoo hadnât looked so proud. Still, it feels like youâre the one always working something out.
Until it doesnât.
One night, you come back from a night out with friends and are rummaging through the cabinets looking for a snack. This is the thing you hate about living with Wonwoo. Heâs taller than you and doesnât think twice about using the higher cabinets. You, on the other hand, canât reach them so easily. Youâre on your tiptoes trying to reach something when you feel him press into your back. His hand comes up and grabs the box you were reaching for with ease. You press further back into him when your heels hit the floor again.
âFuck, youâre driving me crazy,â he mumbles into your hair. His hands find a place on your hips, holding you against him. This feels different from how every other time has started.Â
âWhat do you mean?â you ask quietly into the silence of the apartment.Â
He lets one hand slide down, quickly meeting the bare skin of your thigh. You know your skirt is a little shorter than normal, but the night seemed to call for it. âThis. Did you go out hoping to bring someone home?âÂ
âMaybe,â you say, shivering a little at the way his breath tickles your ear.Â
âAre you trying to tease me?â he asks. It comes across almost like a demand.Â
You wiggle your ass against him a little before you answer. âI would never.âÂ
âOf course not,â he says.Â
Everything that happens after that feels different. Itâs never started like this. Itâs been passionate, but itâs never been driven by so much raw desire. Itâs never been the kind of sex where Wonwoo pushes your skirt up around your hips and pulls your underwear down to your ankles. Never been the kind of sex where he buries his face in your pussy while you grip the counter for support. Never been so desperate and needy and rushed.Â
He makes you come twice on his tongue with your knees going so weak that you can barely stand before he even moves onto actually fucking you. Youâre so weak by the time you finish that he has to help you to the bathroom to clean up before he tucks you into your bed. Youâre so tired that you donât even realize how intimate it is when you ask him to get into bed with you.Â
The disappointment that sets in when you wake up to get some water in the early hours of the morning hits you hard. Entirely too hard for something thatâs supposed to be free of feelings. Your bed feels a little empty without him taking up space. Which is really stupid because itâs not like thatâs been something youâve been doing all of the time. Itâs not something youâre used to. But, thereâs an unexpected comfort in him. Something that catches you completely off guard. As you drift back off to sleep, you resolve to deal with your feelings in the morning.Â
Thatâs how you find yourself sitting on Minghaoâs couch as he makes you both a cup of tea. He hasnât asked about your roommate yet, but you know that itâs coming. He just wants to have everything he thinks youâll need first. A few minutes later, he sets two cups of tea down next to the plate of snacks he threw together. If you werenât in such a crisis, youâd have time to be envious over how pretty the presentation looked.Â
âSo things with Wonwoo have gotten awkward?â he asks without preamble.Â
âJesus, Hao, let me take a sip first, at least,â you groan.Â
âI donât want to say that I told you this was a bad ideaâŚâ he starts.
âYou were the one who spilled the beans that I thought he was hot. This is your fault too,â you point out.Â
âI told him that he wasnât alone in thinking his roommate was hot. I didnât tell you both to start fucking without realizing it was bound to blow up,â he says.Â
âI know,â you sigh.Â
âSo, whatâs going on?â he asks.Â
Minghao is a lot of things. He can be a bit of an art snob. Heâs that kind of impeccably dressed where he looks like he just stepped off a runway. He can appear a bit detached. But, heâs also one of the most thoughtful people you know. Heâs complex and he cares for his friends more than he cares for himself most times. Both you and Wonwoo are among those he counts as his closest friends. So, he just listens as you lay out everything thatâs happened since the first time you had sex. He doesnât judge or interrupt. Patiently, he just waits as you get it all off your chest, including how you felt after last night.Â
None of that really comes as a surprise. You know that heâs going to give you shit and be there for you at the same time. What does come as a surprise is what he says when youâre done laying out your issues.
âI havenât wanted to set you up because I wasnât sure you were in the right place for it, but I actually have a friend that I think you might hit it off with,â he says. âHeâd definitely get you out of this whole Wonwoo funk youâre in so things can go back to normal.âÂ
âYou wanna set me up?â you ask, surprised.Â
âYeah, I think itâd be good for you,â he says.Â
âOkay, tell me about him,â you agree.
âHeâs really kind. Kind of talks in a permanent pout, but itâs endearing somehow. Heâs a giant softie at heart and heâs so incredibly loyal. Heâs been talking about how heâs looking for something a little more serious. I think youâd like him,â Minghao says.Â
âWhatâs his name, Hao?â you ask skeptically.
âMingyu,â he answers and your eyes go wide.
âMingyu? As in that hot model youâre friends with?â you ask.
âYeah,â Minghao says evenly.
âOkay, you can see if heâs interested,â you agree.
Itâs been a couple days since Minghao threw out the suggestion of setting you up with Mingyu. The two of you have exchanged a few messages and he does actually seem really nice. Heâs also funnier than you expected him to be. When he asks if you want to get dinner the upcoming weekend, you find youâre a little bit excited.Â
Thereâs only one issue. You feel like you need to tell Wonwoo. You know that heâs not going to care, but it still feels weird when youâve been fucking around. Maybe Minghao was right and the whole thing was a terrible idea after all. Itâs hard for you to tell him when you seem to keep missing each other, though. Lately, heâs been playing video games over at Vernonâs place more than normal. Even if theyâre streaming, something feels weird.Â
âHey,â he calls out from the front door, snapping you from your thoughts.Â
âOh hey,â you answer, looking up at him. He doesnât meet your eyes as he moves to head back to his room. âEverything okay?âÂ
He stops to look at you when you ask that question and his eyes still look a bit distant. âYeah, fine. Why?âÂ
âI donât know, youâre being short with me,â you say.Â
He just shrugs. âI donât have anything to say.âÂ
âOkay,â you say, drawing out the first syllable. âWell, I just wanted to tell you that Minghao set me up with his friend Mingyu and I was thinking Iâd go out with him.âÂ
âYou donât have to tell me about your dates,â he says evenly.
âI just thoughtâŚâ you start.
âWe agreed,â he interjects. âEnjoy your date whenever you go.â
âThanks,â you say quietly to his retreating figure.Â
The whole point of agreeing to go out with Mingyu was to get things back to normal with Wonwoo. It was clear that you had gotten in over your head. Now, youâre wondering if things are going to be able to go back to normal at all. This isnât your normal dynamic. You always shared stories about dates, hook-ups, anything and everything under the sun. Your other friends always said it was weird for the two of you and you just ignored them. Now, you feel like youâre in it alone. Maybe theyâre right and it is weird.
Since itâs a little on the later side anyway, you decide to grab something from the kitchen and just head into your room. You can go to bed early and forget that whole conversation even happened. Thatâs probably for the best. Itâll be easier to get back to normal once youâre going on dates again. Once you stop fucking your roommate like you could have ever done that without forming some kind of feelings.Â
Itâs the middle of the night when you feel someone slide into bed around you. A familiar scent slips into your consciousness as an arm slides around your center. You nestle back into the chest and know for sure that itâs your roommate. The same man youâre trying hard to get over.
âWhat are you doing, Wonwoo?â you mumble in sleepiness.Â
âDonât go on the date with Mingyu,â he says. He sounds completely awake.Â
âWhat?â you ask. Your brain is still foggy from sleep.Â
âDonât go out with anyone else,â he says.Â
That makes you open your eyes as the words bounce around in your brain. You turn over to your other side so that youâre facing him. His hair is messy and all heâs wearing is a plain white t-shirt, but your heart still constricts a bit at the sight of him.Â
âWhat do you want, Wonwoo?â you ask, voice thick with mental exhaustion.
âExactly what I told you. I want you to turn Mingyu down,â he says.
âWhy should I?â you challenge.Â
âBecause, well, weâve got thisâŚâ he starts and fumbles over his words.
âWe havenât got anything. Youâve been avoiding me for days,â you point out. âHell, I asked you to stay in bed with me after you fucked me in the kitchen and you couldnât even make it til morning.âÂ
âI know, but I was scared that night because I realized I was starting to feel something,â he says. âAnd then Hao texted me to tell me heâd finally given your number to MingyuâŚâ
âFinally? What do you mean?â you asked.
âHeâs been asking for your number for months,â Wonwoo says through somewhat gritted teeth. âSo Minghao told me youâd agreed to be set up and I donât know, I guess I just decidedâŚâ
âTo avoid me?â you supply.Â
âI didnât know what to do. And I didnât know how to process you not telling me,â he admits.Â
âYou werenât around for me to tell you,â you point out. âWeâve been fucking. I wasnât just gonna be like oh by the way, Iâm going on a date.âÂ
âPlease donât go on a date with him,â Wonwoo asks again.
âI will consider not going if you can actually talk to me,â you say.Â
âAbout what?â he asks.Â
âEverything youâre feeling and why this whole letâs just be roommates that fuck was stupid,â you say.Â
âWhatever you want, sweetheart,â he says immediately.Â
You sigh, realizing that youâre not going to be able to go back to sleep, and send Wonwoo to the kitchen to get you something to drink. By the time heâs back, youâre sitting up in bed and ready to have an actual conversation.Â
You stay up entirely too late talking about everything between the two of you. Itâs a little hard to believe Wonwoo is so open with admitting how he feels. Itâs harder to believe that Wonwoo knew he felt something for you before the very first time you had sex. In his mind, it was clear that he wasnât just offering because the two of you were friends. He offered it as a way to gauge your own feelings. But, after that first time, he kind of figured it was just sex and tried to detach himself from it. That was when you started to feel something for him.Â
When heâs done admitting his own mistakes and feelings, you figure that itâs time for you to own up to your own. It was really silly to just make up his side of the conversation about why he didnât stay in bed with you that night. After all, the one thing you both stressed before sleeping together the first time was that you had to be honest in your communication. Thatâs what friends did and you were friends before anything else. As it turns out, youâre both way more on the same page than either of you realized.Â
âYouâre wrong about one thing, though,â you admit.Â
âWhatâs that?â he asks.
âIt was never just sex for me. I was totally done the first time you kissed me,â you share, picking at a thread on your comforter to avoid looking at him.
âI kissed you before we even had sex,â he points out, incredulous.Â
âYeah, turns out Iâm not so good at the just friends who fuck thing,â you say with a shrug.Â
âIf Iâd have known that was all it took, Iâd have kissed you months ago,â Wonwoo grumbles.
That brings you up short. âNu, just how long have you liked me?âÂ
âI donât know, a while,â he says.Â
You just shake your head at him before pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. âJust talk to me next time.âÂ
âCan we go back to having sex now? I miss the feel of you,â he whines out. âAnd the taste.âÂ
âWe literally fucked less than a week ago,â you point out to try and avoid the way it makes heat pool.Â
âI could taste you every day and never get sick of it,â he says without any embarrassment.Â
âAre we really giving this a try?â you ask.
âUnless you donât want to,â Wonwoo says.
âI do, Iâm just scared. What if we try a relationship and it doesnât work?â you ask. âYouâre one of my best friends. I donât wanna lose that.âÂ
Wonwoo reaches out to tilt your head up. âWeâll just promise to be honest with each other. We can figure this out together.â
âOkay,â you agree.
âSo, weâre doing this?â he confirms.
âYeah, weâre doing this.âÂ
Just like that, you agree to take a leap with the only person that youâve always trusted to catch you every time you fall. It feels scary, but also completely natural.Â
i hope you enjoyed it! đ
#wonwoo smut#seventeen smut#svt smut#wonwoo x reader#seventeen x reader#svt x reader#wonwoo fanfic#wonwoo x you#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo imagines#svt fanfic#seventeen fanfic#svt x you#seventeen x you#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#svt imagines#svt scenarios#svthub#kvanity#ksmutsociety
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Can I have yandere Aka Manto x Reader? I see you write Japanese myths, cuz why not?
Yandere! Urban Legend x Reader [Aka Manto]
You never know when you're going to meet your soulmate. It could be on a beach at sunset, on the last bus home, in the elevator of an office building...Or in a public bathroom after you just finished your business. Nevertheless, this urban legend monster has its eyes on you now.
Content: gender neutral reader, urban legend, part horror part comedy, gore!, monster romance
"Are you deaf? It's occupied!" you shout one final time, giving the door a swift kick to emphasize your presence. That's what you get for using a public restroom. Your coworkers had convinced you to try out another bar after the company dinner, and you might've had one too many cocktails. Thankfully most of the drinks were watered down, although it is exactly because of this detail that you're now hovering above a toilet seat with a full bladder. On a Friday night, in the partying neighborhood of the city, so it could explain the persistent stranger - possibly even drunker than you - who keeps rattling the lock of your stall.
To your horror, the handle begins to turn, and you hear a click. You scramble to get up and secure the door, but it's too late. With your pants halfway down, you gawk at the bizarre individual squeezing his way in: a tall figure wearing a red cloak and a mask. "What the Hell?" is all you can mumble to yourself, awkwardly gathering your garments in order to preserve your remaining ounce of dignity. Out of all the things to happen tonight...Alright, calm down. It's most likely a crackhead. You cast your eyes down and focus on the floor tiles, with patterns strategically chosen to hide as much grime as possible.
Pretty. Almost too pretty to kill. He might just take his time with you and savor the moment. Of course, you'll have to answer his question first. With bureaucratic efficiency, he pulls out two rolls of toilet paper and extends them to you. "The red one, or the blue one?" he asks with theatric gravity. What in the Avon samples Hell is this, you think, fidgeting nervously and avoiding any eye contact still. If you ignore him, he should lose interest.
A minute passes in heavy silence. His ghastly arms begin to tire, so he lowers them with a disappointed creak of the joints. "Y-you have to pick one", he insists. Damn it! Perhaps you've been told what to do if approached by mischievous spirits like him? Ignorance means you keep your head, though he was hoping for a gory night of entertainment. You can almost feel the intense stare coming from behind the eerie mask. The tension becomes unbearable, so you finally decide to push your luck. You will not spend the night stuck with a deranged pervert looming over you in a public bathroom.
Without further delay, you shove him aside and open the door. He lets out a surprised hum, observing your daring gesture and almost expecting you to run for your life. To his even greater shock, however, you stop to wash your hands with a relaxed whistle, completely unbothered by his presence. What happened to the fear, the terror, the dread? You peek at his reflection in the mirror, and your lips curl in a mocking grin. Maybe it's the alcohol finally hitting your nervous system, but all you see right now is a pathetic charlatan who tried to intimidate you with literal toilet paper. A good-for-nothing scoundrel interrupting the innocent from their much-needed bathroom break.
In fact, the more you consider your situation, the more your chest puffs with outrage and bravery. You pay your taxes, you help the needy, and this is how your civic deeds are rewarded? By having your stream cut midway? Unbelievable. Unacceptable. No other soul shall suffer your fate tonight. "Wretch!" you cry out, turning towards the aggressor and continuing your demands: "Evacuate the premises at once!"
You might not understand it yet, but your act of defiance has sealed your fate. The hooded monster smiles, relishing the words that have closed the gap between your fragile body and his blasphemous claws. You have spoken to him; thus, he can do with you as he desires. And yet, his murderous fingers hesitate. Your entrails should be splattered across the rarely polished porcelain by now. What's holding him back? He tilts his head in contemplation, but any intention to ponder his feelings is quickly discarded once a loud shriek pierces his ears.
As it turns out, someone else had been using the neighboring stall and was alerted by your little argument. Their finger is pointed at the cloaked creature, features twisted in disgust and fear. "Can't you tell we're busy?" The mysterious man inquires sarcastically. On second thought, this should be enough to satisfy his cravings.
With a snap of the fingers, the frightened bystander is torn apart by invisible hands right before your very eyes. Their limbs detach with surreal ease, and blood splatters everywhere in hot, sticky bursts. In your petrified daze, you are reminded of nature documentaries: blurry snippets of sharks trashing their victim around, fleshy chunks coming undone from the violent handling. Within seconds, the bathroom is quiet again. The walls and ceiling are drenched in fresh blood, and occasionally, fat droplets collapse into a puddle with resounding echo.
It all falls into place. The hooded creature claps its hands, startling you back into awareness. "That's what it was!", he says with enthusiasm. He approaches you with quiet steps, cushioned by the meaty remains coating the floor. He places one hand over the mask, removes it, and gives it a shake as if to clean off the crimson fluid. You involuntarily gaze at his face, taken aback by the handsome traits. Is this the appearance of a ruthless ghoul who butchers mortals for amusement? You wouldn't believe it if it wasn't for the hot trickle of foreign blood trailing your skin.
"I think I've fallen in love with you", he confesses with a wide, saw-toothed smile. You feel a clawed finger tracing your cheek affectionately. "Well? What're you so silent for? You were quite cheeky a moment ago!" he continues tauntingly, gripping your chin and forcing you to look up. "Or have you seen what happens when you misbehave? No, no, darling, I'd never! There are other ways in which I can ruin you."
You're suddenly very cold. With dry lips, you eventually open your mouth to speak: "I'm not leaving here, am I?"
"You could, but that would make me very upset."
#forgive me anon I tried to be serious but the temptation of the piss stalker was too great#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere x darling#yandere monster#aka manto#aka manto x reader#japanese urban legend#yandere headcanons#monster x reader#yandere monster x reader#yandere scenarios#yandere imagines#horror#horror x reader#monster x human
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could you elaborate, why do you believe that people online continue to talk about the flint water crisis as if it were still active? Is it just ignorance of the solution or are there ongoing health issues?
i mean i think people do that bc "everything is fucked and nothing ever gets better" is a genre of post that tickles the limbic system, and in the attention economy of the internet, anything that tickles the limbic system tends to do well, bc it produces engagement. outrage, and outrage-adjacent things, and cliches like "why is no one talking about [major news article everyone is talking about]" and "don't get excited about apparently-good-thing X, here's why it's actually just as bad as [completely different thing it is in no way just as bad as]" and all that other stuff.
and because negativity and outrage--even negativity with no underlying substance--makes a bigger splash than positive stuff with real underlying substance, continuing to repeat "flint doesn't have clean water" (a crisis that did genuinely drag on for a very long time!) has more salience than the news that flint's water problem was fixed (something that took a long time when it finally was properly tackled and didn't generate a single large headline).
there's kind of a similar dynamic in climate news actually, where genuine improvements in areas like energy storage and clean energy rollout and new nuclear permitting don't make a dent in people's narrative that everything is fucked and we're making no progress because IPCC forecasts about what would happen if we hit 4 degrees of warming are genuinely very bad and scary (and, thankfully, no longer on the table!), whereas the boring policy details of stuff in the Inflation Reduction Act, or China's continuing expansion of EV manufacturing are, well... boring. although climate news is different in other ways--like, the planet will continue to warm until carbon emissions are net negative, so even as we make progress on that issue the crisis continues. it's not all good news. but there is good news there, which just gets much less traction online bc of the dynamics of how news works on the internet.
needless to say, though, i think if you want to have an accurate understanding of the world you need to internally mentally check your own tendency to succumb to engagement bait like this. worst case scenario you fall into a doom loop, which i think is pretty unhealthy just in general. but if you notice somebody post something compelling, and you click on their username, and it turns out that all they post is about how the world is fucked, and nothing good ever happens, and we're all gonna die, i think you should be suspicious of them and their motives. not because doomposting is inherently manipulative or deceptive--a lot of people genuinely are doomers! but that doesn't mean they're not responding to the limbic incentives of social media, either. after all, if you too express nothing but pessimism and outrage, then the people addicted to pessimism and outrage will applaud you for being Very Serious and give you lots of engagement and attention, and you will react accordingly.
and also, you know. some people do just lie on the internet for attention. that is absolutely a thing that happens. i am not inclined to bend over backwards to try to reconstruct a generous framing of those lies where maybe people somehow are under the mistaken impression that there is some ongoing sub-problem affecting flint that they have mistaken for being isomorphic to the original crisis. some of them are just liars!
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⧠vegas temptation
⧠synopsis: Falling victim to yet another failed situationship, you're consumed by dread. Maybe love is something you aren't destined to experience in this lifetime? Or maybe you just need a little getaway and a friend who'll accompany the series of impulsive decisions this would entail. Thankfully, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right?
⧠genre: fake dating au, heavy on smut with a sprinkle of angst
â§warnings: cream play, nipple play, hickeys, different positions, protected/unprotected sex, public nudity (?), tongue-fuck, fingering, denied orgasm, overstimulation, ice play, vibrator play, rope play, candle burns (?) â§recommended artists: Chase Atlantic, The Weeknd, Daniel Di Angelo, Doja Cat
Everyone knows heartbreak is a pain in the ass, but an intriguing one at that.
It pulls on your heartstrings and fuels the desperate longing to feel whole again. Releasing a tide of emotions that follow suit as your consciousness drowns under the shattering pieces of broken promises, white lies and everything in between.Â
But, nothing compares to the ego that awakens within you as you enter a phase of recovery, embarking on the infamous villain arc. One that is flamed with rage and hunger for revenge.Â
Because, let's be honest, a good heart can only take you so far until everything comes crashing down again. Before you are back at square one, like clockwork, slaving after hours just to receive the bare minimum.Â
So, fuck that and fuck Kim Jaewon. Stupid cunt.Â
Honestly, if it wasnât for Jungkook and his Black Amex you wouldnât even bother brushing your hair, let alone worry about which lacey lingerie you should pack for a week in Vegas.Â
The Entertainment Capital of the World.Â
Well, it certainly would be entertaining to put two best friends into a coupleâs suite and hope that nothing happens. But, as Jungkookâs dilated pupils watched you swallow your feelings with another shot of tequila it didnât really seem like he was the one betting on that deal. Quite the opposite actually.Â
âHonestly, screw him, y/n.â he muttered, running his fingers through those dark locks as the two of you waited for your flight at the boujee business lounge.Â
In contrast to his trust fund upbringing, you felt like the biggest elephant in the room venturing into the wrong tax bracket. So, the potential side effects of the alcohol running down your esophagus were primarily to calm the nerves of sticking out like a sore thumb, and only slightly to forget your ex.Â
âHave you been listening at all? I kind of already did.â your lips pursed in annoyance, words barely stringing together.Â
You weren't annoyed at Jungkook, per se, more so at yourself for letting it get this far. For intoxicating your system at the crack of dawn, as at least twenty pairs of eyes watched the two of you bicker. But, come on, surely it was 5 pm somewhere. Listen, when everything is already going wrong, how damaging could another bad decision be? Especially, in the form of a liquid. So, please, everyone keep your judgement to yourself.Â
âWell, then that might just be the problem.âÂ
âHuh?â your gaze furrowed, brows knitted with confusion.Â
âYouâre fucking the wrong guys, y/n.â Jungkook whispered with a sly grin.Â
âRight. And you, Iâm assuming would have been my Mr. Right, of course.â you scoffed, jabbing your finger into his chest before looking back up at his heavy gaze.Â
âGive me a week and we'll see.â he teased, using his foot to pull on your chair, bringing your tipsy form closer until inches were separating your parted lips from his.Â
Playful would have been the best word to describe your relationship with Jungkook. You never crossed the line between friends and lovers but were in very close proximity to doing so. So, when you poured your heart out, crying on his shoulder the night Jaewonâs cheating scandal broke out like wildfire, a part of Jungkook was pleased by the news despite how selfish it might have looked.Â
Simply put, he was never a fan of your boyfriends. How could he be when the mere sight of another man beside you triggered every cell in his body, charging a visceral reaction that was forced to be suppressed, kept on the low because you were never his to be territorial of.Â
Never his to be taken care of. To be loved. Oh, if only you knew how badly he wanted it. How badly he wanted you.Â
Only, you did know. Because, like a sickening aftertaste, the tension between the two of you always lingered. But he kept his distance, and you played on with the denial. Praying for each otherâs downfall, you hoped that the other would finally cave in, and say the three words that would change the trajectory of your relationship forever.Â
But, as time went on, his fetish for your love only grew stronger and an innocent crush matured into a craving. One that could no longer be suppressed no matter how much you tried to push it away. To push him away.Â
Jaewon was your last straw. The breaking point that made you question whether you were destined to be loved in this lifetime. And although he caused you pain, you didnât know if you should thank your ex or curse his whole bloodline, because now that he was gone there was no point in denying that Jungkook and you were more than just friends.Â
Lathering the shea butter on your damp skin, your vision was hazy, body seemingly recovering from the hot shower. But, after that 15-hour flight surrounded by multiple throw-ups and diaper changes, a scrub-down was a must. So, there you were standing in front of the full-sized mirror in the pink pyjama set your mom gifted you specifically for this trip. Whatever that meant. Â
See, Jungkook had a way with words. It was his charm. His sensual demeanour could have an innocent bystander wrapped around his finger with one plea. A practical skill that most likely fueled your motherâs spending on the silk fabric, but one that you have yet to fall victim to.Â
His mind games were strong, but your stubbornness was stronger. He didnât mind, actually, kind of adored it. The dominant side of you, the way you could shut him up with one glare. It made loving you so much more thrilling, worth fighting for every sigh, every eye roll, every sneer.Â
âStop looking at me like that.â you blurted at the man's reflection as his palms rested on the top of the doorframe, darkened orbs bluntly eying your body from top to bottom.Â
âLike what?â Jungkook grinned, nibbling on his lip rings.
âLike you want something.â you whispered with a furrowed gaze, spraying some leave-in conditioner into your detangled hair.Â
âHmm ⌠but, I do want something.â he teased, inching closer before you felt his bare chest hit your back, veiny hands holding onto your waist.Â
âI bet. I made rules you know? In case you thought Iâd give in so easily.â you murmured, turning to face him as your fingers slightly tugged on the towel wrapped around his hips.Â
âIs that so?â he chuckled softly, eyes flickering down to your plump lips.Â
âMhhm,â you nodded, feeling his hands slowly travel up your top as your own intertwined behind his neck.Â
âDid I break any already?â he rasped into your ear, teeth grazing against the soft skin.Â
Your mouth curled into a mischievous sneer as you whispered, âJust one.âÂ
However, before he could respond, your fist was already gripping the chains on his neck, gently pulling him toward the king-sized bed that was covered in rose petals and a complimentary note from the hotel.Â
Happy honeymoon, lovebirds!
Loosening his towel, Jungkook watched as you straddled his lap, pressing your hands onto his chest before innocently glancing up at his parted lips. You could have sworn a drool dripped down his mouth, but it mightâve just been your ego flying through the roof as you felt his racing heartbeat.  Â
âMay I?â you teased, slowly rocking your hips against the friction beneath you.Â
âBy all means, love.â he purred, tracing his hands back onto your thighs before flinching at your sudden slap.Â
âHands off, Jeon. Rule number one.â you giggled at the sudden change in his demeanour. The way his furrowed gaze searched for the audacity that couldâve potentially justified the words that came out of your mouth.Â
âYouâre fucking with me, right?â he groaned, jerking his head back.Â
âNo?â a small pout worked its way over your innocent face, eyes fluttering.Â
âBaby, please.âÂ
Was he begging? Or were your knees buckling from the fatigue? Whatever. Keep focus, y/n.Â
âI warned you, Koo.â you winked, brushing your lips over his before a knock on the door interrupted the little moment.Â
âRoom service!â a manâs voice echoed from the corridor.Â
I guess the sight of Jungkookâs sculpted chest completely hazed your mind as you struggled to recover even the slightest recollection of ordering food.Â
âComing!â you yelled out, planting a kiss on the tip of his nose until his hold on your waist tightened.Â
âNo, stay.â he murmured, voice laced with desperation.Â
âI have to open the door, Jeon, that's kind of how it works.âÂ
âI like you here.â he grinned, tugging on your bottom lip before leaving a soft spank on your ass. And, as you glanced back at his heaving chest you feared that rule number one was going to be short-lived.Â
âDo you like it? They didnât have Carbonara but I thought shrimp fettuccine would have sufficed,â you said with slight hesitation which shortly dissipated as you watched him empty the dish clean. Â
âTrust me, y/n. You being here has already made me a happy man. Everything else is just a cherry on top.â Jungkook smiled, rubbing his tattooed hand along his jaw before reaching for the last plate cover.
âHonestly, I wanted to thank y-,â your words were interrupted by his sudden whine.Â
âNo dessert?â his brow arched slightly.Â
âOh. Shoot, sorry. I ⌠I didnât think youâd want any.â your words came out as a stutter, eyes frantically searching for the phone.Â
âMhmm, but I would kill for some cheesecake.â he sighed with a pout, loosening the buttons on his shirt.Â
Changing out of the cotton fabric that covered his cucumber-scented body roughly five minutes ago, Jungkook decided to parade the same pyjama set as you. And, now that the two of you were matching, it was clear what your momâs mission was all along.Â
âYeah, okay, let me just call them b-âÂ
âNo need.âÂ
âHuh? So, you donât want dessert?âÂ
âI do.â he teased, keeping his voice low and calm.Â
âOkay, letâs cut back on the riddles, Jeon. Do I call or not?â
But, there was no answer. Instead, he simply excused himself from the table before walking towards the red couch, patting the seat next to him.Â
âCome here, y/n.â his voice lowered to a rumble, darkened orbs filled with nothing but lust.Â
âWhy?â
âIf I canât touch you let me at least taste you.âÂ
Your heart skipped a beat. Hands fidgeting with the rings on your fingers.Â
âI beg your finest pardon?â you scoffed from pure disbelief, folding your arms over your chest.Â
âBaby, you have at max three seconds to walk your fine self over here before I grab you myself.âÂ
âWas that a threat?â you glared at his sly expression, hooded gaze colliding with yours.Â
âOne âŚâ his tone demanded a response.Â
But, you didnât move. Not even an inch. Aggravating the tension.Â
âTwo âŚâÂ
Who does he think he is? Grab you myself. Claw machine sounding ass.Â
âThree âŚâÂ
You chuckled, giving him the nastiest eye roll before your muscles tensed up, seeing his 5â8 gym rat physique actually get up.Â
âOkay! Alright! Iâm coming.â you blurted in sheer panic, fixing your bottoms before doing the walk of shame toward his pleased self.Â
Reaching out his hand, you pushed it away, reminding him of the deal.Â
âRight here, love.â Jungkook grinned, marking his chest as a target for your landing.Â
What a tease.Â
âYou know what, Koo. Fine. If you want to play games, letâs play a game.â you hissed with a wink, stripping out of the silk fabric before dropping it on his lap. Â
âFucking hell.â a growl escaped his parted lips as his eyes raked over your glistening skin, admiring every inch, every crevice of your body.Â
He was needy, but you were too busy rummaging through the mini-fridge to notice how desperately he longed for your attention.Â
âPerfect!â you exclaimed, shaking a bottle of whipped cream before straddling his lap once again. Except this time, in your black lingerie. One that was initially reserved for Jaewonâs eyes only until he decided to fuck you over. Now, the privilege was all Jungkookâs.Â
âY/n.â he breathed out heavily, creased forehead resting on yours.Â
And, as you pressed your thumb against his chin, your index finger slid along his bottom lip, feeling his tongue lick the cream off your skin.Â
âJust like that, baby.â you gave him a tiny nod of reassurance, glancing up at his doe-eyed gaze.Â
Fuck, submissiveness never looked this good.Â
âY/n, please.â he whimpered, hands hovering over your skin before you finally gave in, intertwining your fingers with his.Â
Unclasping your bra, you let his veiny hands rest on your perky breasts, decorating your hardened nipples with his special treat.Â
âTaste me,â you purred, tugging on his bottom lip as his mouth opened in a half-moan.Â
He was wasted. Big time.Â
âYou sure?â he had to double-check, searching your lustful gaze for approval.Â
âI am. Enjoy your dessert, Jeon.â the words simply rolled off your tongue, like youâve been meaning to say them all along. And, as you ran your fingers through his messy hair, slightly tugging on the ends, the built-up need within you slowly inched up, begging for his touch.Â
Cupping your breasts in his burning palms, he peppered your skin with sloppy kisses, teeth grazing against the pinks of your sensitive nipples before biting down on the flesh.Â
âFuckâ you hissed with your head jerked back.Â
Sucking off the creamy delight that painted your swollen tits, his pierced tongue licked its way up to your parted mouth, marking your neck with purple hues of possession.Â
âKoo,â you rasped against his ear, shamelessly rocking your hips back and forth as you felt the knot in your stomach tighten.Â
âI know, baby.â he muttered, gently lifting your frail body before pinning it against the armrest of the red couch.Â
Giving a little shake to the whipping cream that dropped from your hands, Jungkook levelled his face to yours, drawing a line down your stomach. And, as he watched you arch your back from the cold sensation, a spark of temptation danced in his darkened eyes, cheeks flushed from the sinful whimpers that escaped your parted lips until the warmth of his tongue eased the pain.Â
Moving down the center line, his fingertips traced your ribs, a faint outline of which poked with each breath you took. In and out, your diaphragm was working overtime, trying to keep up with the suffocating demand. One that only fueled Jungkookâs cravings, as he tugged onto the black lace of your lingerie.Â
âCompliments to the chef,â he whispered teasingly, gaze softening at the arousal that had your panties all drenched.Â
âJeon, stop staring, this is so embarrassing.â you whined, voice muffled by the pillow that covered your rosy cheeks as you desperately attempted to close your legs and simply vanish.Â
âItâs not my fault someone forgot to order dessert.â he grinned, pulling you closer as his hold on your thighs tightened, before hooking your ankles over his bare shoulders. âNow, please. Let a man eat.â
Admiring your sleeping features, Jungkook cuddled into your chest, planting soft kisses on your marked neck before dozing off inside your arms until the buzzing of your phone startled him right out of REM.Â
No Caller ID
âY/n?â a manâs hesitant voice echoed in his ear.Â
âSheâs sleeping.â Jungkook muttered, gently stroking your knuckles with his thumb.Â
âWho is this? Jungkook, is that you?â Jaewon exclaimed, evidently more on edge than before.Â
âWhat do you want?âÂ
âCan I talk to, y/n?âÂ
âAs I just said, sheâs sleeping.â Jungkookâs tone was low, aggravated by the need to repeat himself.
âWell, can you wake her up?âÂ
âShe seemed quite worn out after the fifth round, so I probably shouldnât.â a grin curled his lips as you rested your head on his heaving chest, completely naive to the unfolded event.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âLose the number, Jaewon.â Jungkook gritted through his teeth, ending the call before tossing your phone on the edge of the bed.Â
Feeling the warmth of the sun rays peeking through the silk curtains, you stretched your sore body, patting the mattress next to you before noticing Jungkookâs absence.Â
âMmhm?â you pouted, reaching for your phone to check the time.Â
Thereâs no way you slept through breakfast and he didnât wake you. Based on your history of âhangrynessâ and emotional breakdowns that followed suit he should know better.Â
7:45 amÂ
âJungkook?â you called out, covering yourself with the sheer nightgown before knocking on the bathroom door, waiting for a response.Â
Nothing.Â
âJeon?â you called again, this time scanning the living room. Everything looked frozen in time, left untouched from the night before â the empty bottle of wine and the stained glass marked with your red lipstick. But still, no trace of Jungkook.
Going back into the bedroom, you quickly brushed your teeth and changed into a baby blue sundress, opening up the blinds to let in the natural light.
âShit!â you yelped, widened eyes staring at Jungkookâs sculpted back.Â
Sliding the door just enough to pass by, you felt the goosebumps spread across your body as the morning breeze danced around your bare skin.Â
âOh, I thought you quit.â you gasped, brows knitted with confusion as you looked over his broad shoulders, the smell of cigarettes lingering between you two.Â
âYeah, well, I thought you cut ties with Jaewon. So ⌠I guess weâre both disappointed.â Jungkook exhaled sharply, turning his head halfway to take in another puff.Â
Something was off, he seemed distant, cold to the touch.Â
âWhat? What are you talking about?â you asked, hands fidgeting with the straps of your dress.Â
âHe called last night.âÂ
âWhy? Is he okay?âÂ
And, thatâs when he erupted. Back pressed against the railing, his body turned to face your timid form, before muttering, âDo you care?â
âWell, no? But ⌠if we stopped talking and you suddenly called I would want to know why,â you hesitated with the explanation, analyzing the way his forehead creased with each word. Â
âMmhm, except I never treated you like a scrumbag, did I?â Jungkook swallowed, rubbing his tattooed hand along his flexed jaw.Â
âTrue, but you never pursued me either.â you snapped back, arms crossed over your burning chest.Â
âThis is a prank, isnât it?â he scoffed maniacally, eyes twitching from disbelief.Â
âIâm dead serious, Jeon. Why did you keep your distance if you wanted me so badly?â
He didnât answer. Letting the two of you stare at each other for a split second, before finally taking a step forward, following your pace as your back hit the glass door. Leaning his hands on either side of your head, his broad shoulders hovered over you.
If this was his attempt at scaring you or somehow making you feel beneath him, it was not working. Because, as his face levelled with yours, your gaze furrowed, never breaking eye contact. Standing firm on what you said.Â
âY/n, I kept my distance because I wanted you so bad.âÂ
âKind of dumb, donât you think?â you pouted with a slight head tilt.Â
By now, Jungkook was ready to combust. The adrenaline running through his veins prepared to set off his fight or flight response at any given moment.Â
âOkay. Fine. How about I pursue myself into your ass, hmm?â he growled, tone demanding a response.Â
âI'd looove to see you try.â you teased, eyes fluttering with innocence.Â
âOn the bed.âÂ
âExcuse me?â you scoffed, tongue poking the side of your cheek.Â
âYou heard me. Chop chop, baby girl.â Jungkook rasped against your ear, nibbling on the soft skin as a final warning.Â
To be honest you really didnât know what you were getting yourself into until his fingers ran down your spine, hands tightening their hold on your hips as his growing boner pressed against the arch of your ass.Â
Fuck, he was serious.Â
âFrom now on, Iâll be so close youâd have to scrub my scent off you,â he sneered, gently sliding his two digits over your folds, fingertips coated with your wetness as you remained on all fours.Â
âKoo,â you whimpered, tugging on your bottom lip.
Parting your throbbing cunt, his pierced tongue licked your clit, thumb rubbing it in small circles before your moans grew louder. More desperate. More needy. Hazy mind unable to fathom the calmness you radiated just a few minutes ago.Â
âHold on.â he whispered, reaching for his wallet to grab a strip of condoms before ripping one open with his gritted teeth.Â
âTell me if this is dumb enough for you.â Jungkook teased, mouth sliding along your tensed jaw as he rubbed his erection against your clit, resisting the urge to fill you up right then and there.Â
It was clear that your words irked him but he had to remain calm enough to not hurt you, forcing his annoyance to cool off with a verbal mock.Â
And, as he slowly pushed himself in, whimpers escaped your parted lips, hands gathering up the white sheets into knots, feeling his cock stretch its way in against the warmth of your walls. Cautious of his pace, he needed you to adjust, pulling in and out until there was enough lubrication for the growing friction to feel good, painless.
âKoo,â you whined again, gasping for air as his lips left a trail of open-mouthed kisses down your back.Â
âJust like that, baby. Youâre doing so good.â Jungkook reassured, softening his hooded gaze upon hearing your sweet sounds. The ones that poisoned his thoughts and invaded his dreams all those countless nights.Â
Clenching your clit on his throbbing length, his vision grew in and out of focus, hissing at the tingling sensation.Â
âFuuuck, y/n.â he moaned, fingers digging into your ass, before jerking his head back.Â
Picking up his pace, Jungkook went faster and harder. Slamming himself into you, until his twitching tip touched the surface of your cervix, making your toes curl in ecstasy, as a trail of juices ran down your trembling thighs.Â
âJeon, I'm gonna faint.â you cried out, feeling your throat tighten, lungs stripped away from air.
âJust a little longer, baby.â he muttered, chest heaving up from exhaustion.Â
He was close. Very close. So, as your walls clenched around him for the sixth time, he could have sworn his dick melted. Became part of your anatomy, no longer attached to his person. Surrendered with a white flag.Â
âY/n, look at me.â he urged breathlessly, snapping the rubber off his sensitive dick before giving it a few more pumps, squirting his cum onto your displayed tongue, completely exasperating in the process. Â
âSo,â you swallowed obediently, ânow that you've pursued my ass you'll quit smoking, right?â your doe-eyed gaze glanced up at his darkened orbs that watched you lick the dripping cum off his tip as you sat on your knees. Aware of his response, you brushed your lips against his, inviting his tongue inside before his burning body collided with yours, smiling into the deep kiss.Â
âWell, technically, I didn't go near your ass. Not many girls like that.â Jungkook teased, tucking a few curls behind your ear. Â
âMany girls, huh? How many?â you murmured, tracing the tattoos on his arm as your bodies laid skin to skin, staring at the white ceiling.Â
âAbout five.â he answered, a bit too quickly for your liking.Â
âFive? You man whore.â you scoffed with disgust, quickly retracting your hand from his.Â
âSometimes six, depending on which video loads first.â his nose scrunched in a tiny giggle once he saw your mouth drop, expression left dumbfounded as the dots in your head began to connect.Â
So, that's what kept him busy all this time. Porn? Phenomenal.Â
âNext time, I'll just stay curious.â you sighed, half disappointed yet, also relieved. He mightâve just lied straight to your face but sometimes, it's better to simply pick your battles, choosing to live in blissful ignorance than the chaos of reality. Whatever his reality entails.
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