#not to mention writing and drawing again!...

[chrissturnsfav]

Following the anon i sent so I was thinking that singer!reader has always struggled with loving her like thighs and stomach or smt but hear me out if you’re comfortable with it maybe some mentions of self harm like

A scenario

So reader and Chris are laying in bed cuddling or some shit and he’s like tracing his fingers up and don on her thighs and he notices her scars orrr

They’re laying and he compliments her and she goes on a rampage of how she’s not and how ugly her stomach is or smt

⋆.˚✮ rapper!chris knows how to make singer!reader feel pretty

tw: mentions of body image issues

you're sat on the edge of the couch in chris' big living room, scrolling through photos on your phone. your gaze lingers a little too long on a paparazzi picture of yourself from last weekend, your legs prominently featured. a familiar wave of self-doubt washes over you, and before you can stop yourself, you mutter under your breath, "fuck, my thighs look huge."

chris, who’s been freestyling under his breath while jotting down lyrics in his notebook across the couch, freezes mid-bar. his head snaps up, and his eyes narrow, like he can’t believe what he just heard.

"hold up, what'd you say ma?"

you glance at him, trying to play it off. "nothing, forget it," you mumble wearily as you shake your head.

"nah, nah, we ain't doin' that." he gets up, his notebook abandoned on the coffee table, and strides over to you. "what’s this bullshit 'bout your thighs?”

you sigh, trying to avoid his gaze, but chris crouches down in front of you, his icy blue eyes locking onto yours.

"they’re just... big," you mumble. "like, bigger than they should be."

chris scoffs like you just insulted his entire existence. "bigger than they should be? mama, stop fuckin' wit me right now."

you try to laugh, but it’s weak. "i’m serious, chris. i see all these girls online with these slim legs, and then there’s me. i just feel...i dunno...out of place, i guess."

he sits beside you, shaking his head, still looking like he’s offended on your thighs’ behalf. "you’re trippin'. hard. have y'seen yourself? like, really looked at y'self? 'cause if y'did," he says, reaching out to lightly squeeze one of your thighs, "you’d know your thighs are perfect. thick, pretty, sexy as hell—are you serious?"

your cheeks heat up, and you roll your eyes, but he’s just getting started.

"y'know what your thighs say to me?” he continues and smirks a bit, leaning in. "they tell me you're perfect, tell me y'got the full package. tell me you’re built like a model, and that i’d be a dumbass not to appreciate you."

you can’t help but laugh at his over-the-top delivery, and he grins, knowing he’s getting through to you as he brushes his fingers lightly over the smooth skin on your thigh.

"listen baby," he starts, using his free hand to gently cup your jaw and turn your face to his, "i know the world tries to tell girls all this bullshit 'bout what they’re supposed to look like, but lemme tell you sum'n real: you are it for me. all o'you. those thighs you’re trippin' over? they’re one of my favorite things 'bout you."

he moves his hand down to your knee, his thumb drawing little circles. "so stop comparin' yourself to edited pictures on the internet, aight? you’re real, 'n you’re beautiful, 'n if anyone’s got a problem wit' that, they can see me 'bout it."

your chest feels lighter, the weight of insecurity lifting under his unwavering gaze and heartfelt words. you smile, finally meeting his eyes.

"okay," you whisper.

"okay?" he teases. "that’s it? after i jus' dropped the most fire compliments of all time?"

you laugh again, swatting his arm. "thank you, chris. really."

"'course," he says, pressing a sweet kiss to your forehead. "now stop geekin', i gotta go write a verse 'bout how my girl’s got the finest thighs in the game."

you roll your eyes, but your smile lingers long after he’s returned to his notebook on the other side of the couch.

𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲: i'm not comfortable writing about self harm, so i hope this was good!

thank you for reading!! <3

tags: @sturnobsessedwh0re , @idrk2292 , @mattsbrat , @ribbonlovergirl , @swagalicious260 , @sturnhyyhblog , @matthewsroses , @mattsdemi , @emely9274 , @frankoceanfanpage , @ifwdominicfike , @marrykisskilled , @strnilolover , @cayleeuhithinknott

@chrissturnsfav ™

[mrs-hatake]

jjk men and their toxic traits

warnings: love bombing, obsession, silent treatment as punishment, purity culture, possessiveness, mentions of drug and alcohol addiction, self harm, suicide attempt, self loathing, stalking and younger man x older woman.

a/n: idk what to tell you besties. i did have fun writing nanami's tho, and i think sukuna's the most accurate lol tell me what y'all think :D

Toji: Indifference 

after dating Toji for years, putting him with his recklessness during his assassination assignments, watching him bleed on the bathroom floor while shiu poorly stitches him up, having to move apartments every few months because someone with a grudge or an enemy hunts him down. 

dealing with all of that crap, you’ve exploded once you’ve reached your boiling point.

as much as you love toji with all of your heart, want him to see the beauty of the world and feel alive again, you simply cannot stand by while the man you love kills himself.

that’s why you gave him an ultimatum; change careers and he fixes his life  or you walk out.

you’ve known from the start that toji’s a stubborn mule but you didn’t think that he’d choose his job over you. 

though heartbroken at first, you eventually end up packing your things. maybe now that things have gotten serious and toji sees you slowly removing pieces of yourself from his life, it’d serve as a wake up call.

toji doesn’t even bat an eye.

he’s lounging on the couch, mindlessly watching a baseball match from the television set he’d stolen from his family.

even when you block his view — hands on your hips and all — he just scoots aside and continues watching.

“you knew what you were getting yourself into from the start.” comes toji’s monotone voice after your yelling, “i’ve warned you and you accepted who i am.”

silence fills the room. you stare at him, hoping that once toji sees the heartbreak, rage, frustration and that little bit of moisture glistening your pretty eyes, he’d see the error of his ways.

but no such thing happens.

instead, toji continues to sit on the couch with his mesmerizing forest green eyes, the very ones that made you fall in love with him, are glued to the screen.

when you march to your bedroom to drag out your luggage, toji doesn’t even offer a goodbye. he doesn’t even watch you leave. toji doesn’t bother to chase after you when you’re halfway down the stairs.

Satoru: Love Bombing and Obsession

having been born as the blessed one, nothing really impresses gojo satoru. 

he has mountains of money in his bank account, a stream of endless good luck and women kissing the ground he walks on. with a snap of his fingers, he can have whatever he desires at the palm of his hand.

yet, once you reject him, something inside satoru snaps. no one, no one has ever rejected gojo satoru. it’s always the opposite. 

when you reject him for the fourth time in less than a week, satoru draws up a plan that will surely win you over.

it starts off small. he sends breathtaking bouquets of flowers to your work place with cute little notes praising your beauty. whenever he sees exquisite jewelry, he’s sending them to your house, asking you to wear them. when he’s feeling very d̶e̶s̶p̶e̶r̶a̶t̶e̶  determined, satoru will wire you almost 8 million yen. satoru is then showing up to your work place with the excuse of wanting to take you out for lunch. embarrassed by the glances not so subtly thrown your way and the loud whispers haunting your ears, you agree.

and, honestly, satoru isn’t that bad. he’s got that boyish charm to him, he can be pretty funny and he’s intelligent. maybe you were too harsh with him…is what you initially thought until satoru’s true colors started to show.

he will call you throughout the day asking you what you’re wearing, what you’re eating, what will you eat, who are you with, who were you with, who did you talk to, who are you talking to, who will you talk to and you get the idea.

satoru goes as far as installing tracking devices in your car, home and work place just to stay updated. he even threatened your male co-workers, relatives and friends from talking to you as he strongly and firmly believes that he’s the only one you need.

gojo satoru is like a disease you can’t escape.

Kento: Silent Treatment

nanami kento’s biggest hatred in life aside from the corporate tyranny is adults who are quite immature.

and you know this. but sometimes your emotions get the best of you.

like the other night, you had a pretty nasty fight with kento. you had accused him of flirting with another woman at the end of the year party the company kento is working at hosted. when kento defended himself and explained that the woman was all over him, you yelled that he did nothing to get her to back off.

it was a heated argument which consisted of you yelling your head off and kento constantly defending himself.   

“i’ve had enough of this.” kento mutters as he snatches his pillow and blanket from your bed to go sleep on the couch in the living room. 

come the next morning, you realized your mistake. you barely slept a wink the night before, tossing and turning at your immaturity. guilt lodging itself deep into your soul as you accused kento of infidelity when that man is crazy over you. he works a job he hates just so he can provide for you and for your future family.

with a clearer head, you send him a text.

wanna grab lunch after work?

my treat 🥰  

hopefully, the warm and cozy ambiance of your favorite restaurant will remind you of just how loyal kento is, which will then allow you to apologize and trust him even more.

you go about your day; showering, eating breakfast, cleaning the penthouse. all the while you keep glancing at your phone. you’ve worried your lips so much that they’re bruised and cut, metallic flavor dancing on your tongue.

when kento doesn’t return home, you call him about twenty times until it goes to voicemail.

kento only returns at around nine in the evening. he doesn’t greet you, doesn’t even glance at you. it’s like you’re a ghost. 

you convince yourself that kento is still angry and probably needs some time to cool off but when this behavior continues for almost two weeks, you’re at your wit’s end.

“baby,” you stand in your walk-in closet, reeking of desperation, as kento is busy tying his tie for an important ceremony at his company later that evening, “talk to me.” you plea but he’s silent as the dead.

tears blur your vision as kento continues to ignore you while adding the finishing touches.

“please.” you stand in front of the mirror, obstructing the view of his reflection. “don’t ignore me, kento. please. i was wrong. i shouldn’t have accused you and i shouldn’t have doubted your love for me. i let my insecurities get the better of me. i’m so sorry.”

for the first time in weeks, kento looks at you. actually, looks. his hands tightly grip your waist and lift you off the ground to place you away from the mirror.

dejected by his rejection, tears are crashing down your cheeks like an angry waterfall. 

you try to sand in front of the mirror but kento stops you. just as it feels like the last piece of your heart is about to shrivel up and die, kento leans in and kisses your cheek.

you’re so surprised by the gesture, you don’t notice kento leaving.

it’s only when you hear your phone buzzing on the nightstand that you’re brought to your senses.

i’ll be home late. don’t wait up.

tonight is the first night you’ve had a well rested sleep since your fight.

Sukuna: Purity and Possessiveness 

purity is everything to sukuna. he’s in a relationship with you because of your innocence, how you’re blissfully unaware of the carnal desires of man. having to rely on sukuna and be taught of one’s sexual desire is a huge power trip to sukuna. he guides you every step of the way; teaches you what he loves and shows you what you need. 

it’s such a euphoric world to live in that it’s difficult to leave it. yet it’s something you have to do. sukuna’s licentiousness is overwhelming. his malevolent behavior frightens you and you no longer feel safe in his arms like you used to.

you’ve managed to hide from him for almost three years but sukuna never stopped searching for you. when he finally finds you, it’s with a grin of victory and of mania glowing in his ruby colored eyes.

until his eyes land on your stomach, that his. instantly, he is sneering at you in disgust. sukuna’s insides curl in protest at the repulsive fact that not only are you with another man, mistakenly believing he can ever satisfy you better than he did, you let him plant his seed in you. 

you are–were sukuna’s possession and he doesn’t like to share what rightfully belongs to him. 

why should he take you back when you’ve been spoiled, polluted, by the dirty hands of another man? sukuna doesn’t go for sloppy seconds. and there’s no way in hell he’d raise another man’s child. 

as quickly as sukuna has reappeared in your life, he’s out of it. 

Suguru: Self Sabotage 

the road to recovery is a long and arduous one. but geto suguru is proud of his accomplishments. the challenges he had faced were insanely difficult but meeting you has made things much easier. 

it has taken a while but, eventually, suguru doesn’t feel his fingers twitching for his next fix. he no longer drinks himself to sleep to silence chaotic thoughts. suguru also managed to throw out all of his blades and his arms and inner thighs haven’t been marred in quite some time. 

yet all of suguru’s hard work goes to waste when the two of you had your first major fight. it was cruel. it broke both of your hearts. it forced you to leave suguru’s apartment for a few days to calm down. had you known that your fight, that you leaving suguru, would come with major consequences, you wouldn’t have left. 

you receive the call at around three in the morning. suguru’s in the emergency room after a drug overdose and slitting both his wrists. you’re in no condition to drive as you can’t stop crying, wailing your lover’s name, so your best friend had to drive you to the hospital. 

the doctors inform you that suguru’s chances are slim and you believe their words because you’ve never seen suguru so pale. even when he first met him, he wasn’t as ashy. his face wasn’t sunk in like it is now.

it’s your fault!

you broke him! 

you ruined him! 

you killed him!

you don’t deserve him!

you don’t deserve anyone!

menacing thoughts abuse you throughout the early morning. by the sun comes out and the nurses stop by suguru’s room to check up on him, you’re dead on your seat. 

thankfully, you’ve been rescued from your torturous thoughts by none other than suguru. he stares at you with a haunted expression. his tongue darts out to moisten his chapped.

“y/n,” he croacks your name and you hurry to silence him lest he irritates his throat any further but one glance from suguru has you sitting back down, “i’m so sorry.”

suguru’s voice is so low that you have to lean in to hear him.

“please don’t leave me. i can’t live without you.”

a sickening wave of terror welling up from y/n’s belly at each word suguru uttered. how could she have been so stupid? why did she fight suguru when she knows just how sensitive he is!

shame washes over y/n like tidal waves.

“i’m sorry, baby.” y/n whispers as reaches for suguru’s hand. she places a gentle kiss on the gauzed wrapped around his injured wrist. “it’s all my fault. i won’t do it again.”

y/n searches suguru’s amethyst eyes for forgiveness.

“promise?” suguru asks, sounding so scared.

“i promise.”

Yuuta: Stalking

dating yuuta is like dating an overgrown puppy. 

he’s so loyal to you that one might actually call it blind devotion. yuuta will jump through burning hopes to please and satisfy you. in his eyes, you’re the most beautiful woman blessed on earth.

dating yuuta can be exhausting as well. since he’s five years younger than you, he’s quite energetic. which is exactly what you’ve been searching for after being married to your lazy husband who barely lifts a finger to scratch his ass.

and it was fun at first but now you’re exhausted to the bone and can barely keep up. that’s why you decide that it’s time to hit the gym. you need to build up your stamina if you want to keep up with your good little boy. 

“good luck with gym today!” yuuta is standing at the apartment genkan to send you off. the tail only you can see is wagging in excitement, ready to hear a compliment for doing a good of packing your gym back.

“thank you, my little puppy.” yuuta beams at the baby voice you use and is as light as a feather when you peck his lips not twice but four times.

“be a good little boy while mommy’s gone.” yuuta fervently nodding his head sends you into a fit of giggles at just how adorable he is. 

yuuta waits about ten minutes before he’s sprinting into your bedroom to quickly change his clothes, yank the apartment door open where he takes the stairs by twos and hops on his bicycle, cycling as fast as his legs can allow him. 

he’s stopping right across the street from your gym just as you drive into the basement parking lot. state of the binoculars at the ready, yuuta enters the abandoned building next to your gym and makes his way to the rooftop.

yuuta isn’t stalking you. really, he isn’t. he just…follows you around to make sure nothing happens to you. 

it’s just like he did before he started dating you. yuuta would follow you around town, patiently waiting for him to plant himself in your world like a may flower. he knows all of your favorite places; restaurants, cafes, stores, etc. yuuta knows where you like to go when you want to be alone and he even knows where your parents live despite the fact you’ve been dating for only two months and you have yet to bring up your parents. 

Yuuta’s grip tightens on the binoculars. he despises the fact that there aren’t any male instructors at your gym. he has to watch from the side as your male teacher comes closer and corrects your posture. yuuta’s eyes zero in to make sure that the instructor’s touches don’t linger. 

after about an hour, yuuta receives a text that you’re going to grab coffee with the girls from your pilates class, girls yuuta has pulled up all and any information on them to ensure they aren’t harmful, that they won’t corrupt you.

okay mommy ♥️

yuuta will a good boy and wait for you 😇

yuuta’s on his bicycle, subtly following your car to your favorite cafe by the riverside. 

[revelboo]

Your Soundwave and Starscream make my brain more happy than my antidepressants * - *

I like writing both of them and coming up with alternate takes for them

The idea for the first part popped into my head before bed and was still there in the morning, so I wrote it. But I keep thinking, what if Soundwave knew Shockwave before empurata, back when he was Senator Shockwave? Before they stripped the good parts away and left only the drive to preserve and protect Cybertron, before all the reasons he cared, every emotion but anger had been cut away along with his memories of why it was important to him. What if they were friends and that’s why Soundwave is so patient with his weird, unsettling behavior and anger issues?

Clumsy Heart Pt 2

IDW Shockwave x Reader, Soundwave x Reader

• “I can dispose of this one and find another if they’re unsatisfactory,” he offers when Soundwave is silent, visor dim as he just stares at the human. Displeased with you. Reaching for you, Soundwave’s hand catches his wrist when the human tenses as if considering jumping even though they must realize they won’t survive the fall. Head turning back to Soundwave in question, he waits. “I can find another.”

• “No. Leave it.” You’re only a human, nothing he should care about, but that dispassionate offer to dispose of you doesn’t sit right with him. Knows it’s the lingering grief, but the fear in your eyes, in your mind pulls at him. Makes his spark ache. Releasing Shockwave, he lays the back of his hand on the surface. “Come.” Those wide eyes go from him to Shockwave and back. You’d just heard Shockwave mention disposing you, of course you’re scared of both of them now. And yet, you twist your little hands together and approach him. Stopping just shy of his servos. Looking up at him with wet eyes.

• Dispose, like you’re a bit of trash to throw away. Because the universe isn’t done screwing with you. Apparently catching your ex was just the warm up to this horror. Trying to study them both without angering them, you can feel your heart pounding inside your chest hard enough you wander if you might have a stroke and not actually have to worry about what the giant, robotic monsters want with you. Because that might be the kinder way to go if all the horror movies you’ve watched are any indication. Dissection? Maybe you’re food? A plaything to torment until they break you?

• That anxiety and fear is nearly crippling as Soundwave crooks a servo. Needs you to calm down, because right now he can’t think. Little face grim like you think you’re marching to your own death, you climb into his hand and sit down, shoulders tense. And it’s worse. So much worse when you lay your little palms against him, your wild emotions crashing through his defenses, flooding into him. Shuddering with your fear, head bowing, he’s aware of the ragged, tonal sound of pain he makes. That he’s drowning in you, unable to stop it. “Stop.” Pleading because he can’t shut you out, your terror needling his spark, slicing into him.

• That word sounds like a plea. Like he’s in pain. Something’s wrong. Soundwave trembling faintly as his head dips toward the human. Doesn’t understand what’s happening, but it seems plausible that it’s because of you. Reaching, he uses his cannon to rake you out of Soundwave’s palm, hearing your yelp as you land on your back and slide on the surface of the desk, immediately curling into a ball. And again Soundwave stops him from removing you, grabbing his arm. “Why?” He asks. You’re clearly somehow a threat, so why restrain him? Why not let him permanently remove you?

• Arms covering your head, you draw your legs up against yourself and wait for the next blow. Wonder if you can make it to the edge of the surface you’re trapped on before you’re caught. If you can jump and land so you don’t break something. Needing to believe there’s a way out of this. That you can survive them.

• Venting raggedly as he watches you peek at him, he wonders that himself. You hadn’t been trying to hurt him, your fear just too visceral. A living thing, all jagged edges that can cut him. A hand still on Shockwave’s arm, he reaches out a single servo. Rumbles softly at you, making that low, tonal hum he uses on his cassettes to soothe. Spark aching as you shiver, curling tighter into a ball. Because you’re not a cassette, you don’t understand he isn’t going to hurt you. Ghosting that servo over you, he keeps humming to you. Coaxing you even as it hurts him, his grief and loss tangling with your fear in a confusion of misery. Unable to stop crooning at you through the agony.

Previous

[bluebirdsfeathers]

Cookies

Relationship: Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

Summary: angst and fluff :) Reader tries to bake Wanda some cookies but her emotions bubble over when things don’t go to plan. Good thing Wanda is there to make it all better.

Tw: negative self talk, minor injury.

Word: 1k

A/n: i really wanted to post wayyy more this month but i ended up back in hospital again :/ i started writing this weeks ago but it’s finally done.

This week had been exhausting. With December arriving the deadlines for your assignments were drawing closer. You had several projects that would need turning in soon, most of which you hadn’t even looked at yet. The stress was mounting inside you and what wasn’t helping was the absence of your girlfriend. Wanda.

She’d been pulled away on a mission leaving you alone for the past few days. You missed her deeply. She had sent you a text about the most recent battle making your struggles pale in comparison. The safety of humanity vs an end of term paper wasn’t something even worth debating.

So you didn’t mention it. Besides she was coming home today so you spent the day cleaning; making sure Wanda could relax and put her feet up as soon as she got home to your shared apartment. You’d gone grocery shopping and picked up some fresh flowers as well as ingredients to bake her favourite double chocolate cookies.

As you scrubbed down the bathroom counters all you could think about was your work. An attempt was made to start a project but you didn’t get very far. All the staring at a blank word doc had done was give you a headache. You were so lost in thought of your earlier failure you hadn’t registered the kitchen timer going off.

“Fuck!” You said after checking the time seeing it had been two hours since you put the cookies in the oven. You hurried to the kitchen after smelling the burning. Stupidly you opened the oven door, momentarily blinding yourself as a cloud of smoke engulfed the room setting off the smoke alarm.

“No no no…” Wanda would be home soon and you’d ruined the surprise. Too busy thinking about your own problems. There wasn’t enough time nor did you have enough ingredients to bake another batch. Everything was going wrong today. You couldn’t do anything right. Frantically waving your hands about you tried to clear the smoke. The alarm yelled at you for your mistakes. Its noise stopped you from hearing the front door open.

“Y/n?!” Wanda rushed to the kitchen after seeing the smoke, worried something was on fire, but all she saw was you frantically waving your hands around. She smiled slightly before using her magic to clear the air.

You jumped and quickly spun around as you realized who was there. “W-Wanda!” Instinctively you reached for the tray of cremated cookies, wanting to hide the evidence but forgetting they would still be hot. The hot metal tray burnt your skin and you let out a paid cry.

“Baby no,” Wanda looked concerned as she hurried over to help, “shhhh it’s okay.” She took your hand in hers as she used her magic to heal you but the damage had been done. The small burn had opened the flood gates and weeks of stress began to pour out.

“Does it still hurt?” Wanda asked as you started to cry. You shook your head no. “Whats wrong baby… tell me.” You lean back on the kitchen counter sliding down to the floor. Wanda sits next to you.

You felt silly crying like this. Face red, eyes squeezed tight, loudly sobbing in front of your girlfriend. Frustrated and angry at yourself for not being able to function like everyone else. Wanda looked at you with nothing but concern. “Baby please tell me whats wrong. Are you hurt? Do you not feel well?”

“Just… college work,” you manage to squeeze some words past your sobs. “Been stressed…” You felt embarrassed telling Wanda you’re stressed. She just got back from a life threatening mission and here you are complaining about your stupid day to day life. What you were going through was nothing compared to the dangerous, life threatening, world ending—

“Hey! Your life isn’t stupid.” Wanda interrupts your thoughts catching you off guard.

“No mind reading!” You shot back after you realized what she was doing.

“Sorry baby,” She said guiltily, “but the other half of that deal is be honest with me. I know I was busy but you can still tell me if something wrong.” Wanda looked up at the attempt at cookies and back down at you. “You’re so selfless baby. You did all this for me even when you felt like this?”

You flop over onto your side and pull your legs to your chest, hiding your face. “Doesn’t matter I ruined it. I’m the worst girlfriend ever.”

Wanda laughs, “oh? You’re the worst girlfriend ever are you?”

“…yeah”

“I don’t know, i don’t think the worst girlfriend ever would clean the whole apartment top to bottom, buy fresh flowers and bake my favorite cookies all while dealing with so much else.” You sit back up and see Wanda staring at you with so much love in her eyes it makes you tear up all over again.

“I’m sorry…”

“Shhhh baby,” Wanda pulls you into a hug. “No more apologies. Let’s go cuddle on the couch. Let me take care of my favourite girl.” She pulls you up off the floor and carries you into the living room. You love how Wanda could effortlessly pick you up. It makes you feel so safe to be held in her arms. She sits down on the couch with you on her lap.

“I can make you cookies tomorrow promise.” You say getting comfortable and snuggling into your girlfriend.

“Okay but we’re going to make your favorite not mine, deal?” Wanda whispers in your ear as she rubs circles on your back.

“Deal.” After a stressful day you feel yourself relax against your girlfriend. Tomorrow would be better.

[hazzashouse]

I love your writing! Can you do one about y/n in labor and H cooing/comforting her? Thank you!!

The First Day of Forever (Harry Styles)

A/N: okay so it’s my first time writing sth like this so please bear with me 😅

Triggers: mentions of pain, labour

Summary: As Y/N endures the stress and pain of labor, Harry remains by her side, comforting her with unwavering love and support, despite his own heart aching to see her in pain.

Pairing: Harry Styles!dad x y/n pregnant wife

The room was filled with soft murmurs and the occasional rush of footsteps, but Harry couldn’t hear any of it. His entire world was focused on you. You were gripping his hand tightly, your head resting against his chest, tears streaming down your cheeks.

“I can’t do this, Harry,” you whispered, your voice trembling as another wave of pain coursed through you.

Harry’s heart shattered at the sound of your distress. He crouched down beside you, his free hand brushing the damp strands of hair from your face. “Yes, you can, love,” he murmured, his voice steady but soft, his green eyes filled with a mixture of pride and worry. “You’re the strongest person I know. I promise, you’re doing so well.”

The words seemed to steady you for a moment, but another contraction made you squeeze his hand tighter, and a sob escaped your lips. Seeing you in pain like this made Harry feel utterly helpless, a feeling he wasn’t used to. If he could, he would have taken every bit of it away in an instant.

“Look at me, sweetheart,” he urged gently, his voice full of love. You opened your eyes, meeting his gaze, and he smiled softly, despite the lump in his throat. “You’re not alone. I’m right here with you, and I’m not going anywhere. Remember what we talked about? How we’ve waited for this moment? It’s our little girl, love. She’s almost here.”

A tear slipped from your eye, but you nodded, clinging to his words as tightly as you clung to his hand.

Harry pressed a kiss to your forehead, his thumb rubbing soothing circles over your hand. “I know it’s hard,” he whispered. “But you’re doing this for her, for us. She’s going to be perfect, just like her mum.”

The memory of when you’d first told him you were pregnant flashed through his mind. He’d come home late from a tour meeting, exhausted but eager to see you, and you’d greeted him with a nervous smile and a tiny pair of baby shoes in your hands. It had taken a moment for him to process, but when he did, he’d dropped to his knees, pulling you into his arms as tears streamed down his face.

“You’re going to be the best dad,” you’d told him through your tears. And now, as he sat here with you, helping you through one of the hardest moments of your life, he realized you were right. But only because you were the best partner he could have ever hoped for.

“You’re doing so well, Y/N,” he repeated now, his voice firm but loving. “She’s going to be so lucky to have you as her mum. Just a little longer, and we’ll be holding her, yeah? You and me, together.”

Another sob escaped your lips, but this time it wasn’t just from pain. There was something else there—determination. You nodded again, leaning into him, drawing strength from his words and his presence.

“I love you,” you whispered, your voice shaking.

“I love you more,” Harry replied without hesitation, his lips brushing your temple. “And I love her already, too. She’s got the most incredible mum in the world.”

Minutes stretched into what felt like hours, but Harry never let go of your hand, never wavered in his support. When your cries turned into gasps of relief, the first tiny, indignant cry of your baby girl filled the room.

Harry’s breath caught in his throat, his heart swelling with an emotion so powerful it almost knocked him over.

“She’s here,” he whispered, his voice breaking as tears filled his eyes. “Our little girl, love. She’s here.”

When they placed her in your arms, you let out a choked sob, every bit of pain and stress melting away as you gazed at the tiny, perfect life you and Harry had created together. Harry leaned down, his forehead resting against yours as he stared at your daughter in awe.

“She’s beautiful,” he whispered, his tears falling freely now.

You looked up at him, your eyes shining with exhaustion and pure joy. “We did it,” you murmured.

Harry kissed you softly, his hand coming up to gently touch the little bundle in your arms. “No, you did it,” he said, his voice filled with reverence. “You’re incredible, Y/N. I’ll never forget this moment. Ever.”

And as he held his family close, Harry knew that this—this love, this little girl, this life you had built together—was the greatest thing he’d ever be a part of.

[macknshift]

THE ONE WHERE . . . I INTRODUCE Y'ALL TO LEO!

SOOOO…i have mentioned leo in like, 90 different posts atp and never actually made a "leo intro" (mainly bc i have weird feelings ab sharing him heavily to the rest of the world lol) but! i figured now would be the best time to get into explaining him to y'all.

LEO , commonly given the last name SCOTT (depends on the dr!) is actually originally the main character's love interest in a hockey romance book i've been in the process of writing. after getting #sickandtired of annoying ass book men i gave up and began drafting one of my own. the main character is literally me (i mean, for christ's sake her name is sloane mackintosh,) and eventually, i began thinking of him in other "au"s (i used to do this a lot on wattpad - i mean DRs but the term AU is usually more digestible to ppl that may not be aware of reality shifting. Anyways.) and began kind of placing him in everything. a list of the drs he is my love interest in is follows;

BETTER CR : (fc silasj2004*) the hockey romance book pretty much as a dr. small changes occur but basically he's the exact same as leo in the book lol

PARENT DR : (fc jack schlossberg. yes. i am one of those girlies. i am not ashamed! at least he has morals + a backbone y'all this could be much worse) the "backstory" is my better cr dr. i'm now a mother of 3 (amelia or mimi, aged 5, giselle or gigi, aged 4 and i'm pregnant with vincenzo, our final kid,) and it follows our life after what would be the events of the book. i sort-of made it also as like a WAG dr in a sense bc leo is a professional hockey player! (but he retires 2 years before this point in time so idk where my thought process is w this lol)

FORMULA 1 DRIVER DR : (fc pato o'ward MY!!!! mclaren man ln4 U ARE NOTHINGGGGGGG) leonardo dempsey, son of actor patrick dempsey (my forever celebrity crush ugh he's so fine) and driver for aston martin aramco f1 team under #99. i essentially took l*nce str*ll's daddy's boy backstory and gave it to leo bc he is indeed a daddy's boy. the only dr leo and i are enemies to lovers bc i'm too obsessed w him otherwise LMFAO

MARVEL DR : (fc marcello hernandez (MY MAAANNNN)) leo scott, secretly the speedster superhero 'comet'. hired by my dad as essentially a bodyguard (leo's not intimidating AT ALL idek how the hell this is supposed to work LMFAO) as comet and knows me out of costume as his sister's roommate (mj is also in every dr ever and actually is here in this cr. i can never leave her out i love her DOWN) basically marichat vibes (god i miss marichat)

POP STAR DR : (fc marcello hernandez, again) leo sinatra, nepo baby great-grandson of frank sinatra (there's a whole, incredibly large bit of lore ab this LMFAO + he's also a great-grandson in my better cr dr too bc i need my man RICH!) and Saturday Night Live cast member. basically i go on snl and immediately fall in love. i've stolen the 'unlikely couple' weekend update sketch for us & he does domingo, which is my song lol we're funny for it idk

THE FCS, in color photos:

i'm missing like, 18 other drs that i can think of but some important info about him;

he's half oaxacan mexican. i've tried my damnedness to find a way to make it obvious but when i was 'designing' him (aka drawing him out) i used jack, silas (*NOTE: he is leo's typical fc if i don't have an designated one for him) and marcello as references to make him look the most like him as i can. the fcs are kind of loose for him but i need a way to like fully visualize him. so. yeah. his 'color palette' (weird way to put it but idk how else) makes him tanner than all three of them i fear. all of the fcs i use (other than jack schlossberg but like. idk his main celebrity lookalike in the better cr is him so i kind of had to) are latino, but i feel like it never ever properly translates when i talk about him bc his name is fucking leopold scott. like. huh.

he's also tall AS FUCK lol and built like a tank lowkey (think tom welling clark kent GOOD GOOGLY MOOGLY) but it's mainly bc he's a hockey player. in every vers he's like. 6'3. shortest he is is w marcello as his fc and even then he's 5'11. (note in pop star dr he gets a lot of comparisons to jacob elordi for some reason??? idk my fans are weird)

he's got big brown baby cow eyes. every. single. time. like that is this man's defining trait and you know what? i would not change that for the world lol

his position in hockey is a goalie! he uses the number #29 and plays for our college and later for the new jersey devils before being traded to the anaheim ducks. after he retires he becomes a firefighter!!!! (which is sooo hot btw)

[blitzsicedcoffee]

I started watching this show about half a year after Truthseekers came out. It is now my special interest next to fnaf and others I will watch again and again and again and make theories on and draw fanart for.

This show has consumed some of my waking days. And some of my sleepless nights. It has made me question my mental health, my relationship, those I keep around me, and so much more. In a positive way. It has spurred my love of hurt/comfort and whump fics, and reignited my love for writing. It has also given me a new hobby of fanart, as I never drew fanart before this fandom. And realized I'm actually decent at it.

It has engaged and affirmed my trauma in the form of Octavia's story. My eldest daughter syndrome in the form of Millie's story, my nonbinary identity in the form of Moxxie's story, my self esteem through Stolas, and an examination of my own relationships to my family and the feeling of being the black sheep, through Blitz. And helps towards healing some of these as well.

Not to mention the show gave us Blitz, someone who isn't afraid to be cringe. Who's fully himself no matter who gets on his ass about it. Who's got lofty dreams and goals and meets them through all odds. Truly inspiring little lizard.

I just wanted to review and renew my love for this show. I could care less about the controversies surrounding people. And whether they are true or not. The reason I come back to this show again and again and watch it again and again isn't the people who write it or even the actors. It's the rich story that connects to so many and is so real and raw and fucking funny. And inspired all the Tumblr mutuals I've gained through it.

I wouldn't have any other fandom.

[hydn-jpg]

hi hello @cadybear420 i'm your secret pal!! i'm sorry it's a little late but i'm glad that i got you as my giftee, since i was yours for valentines! i've said it before but i adore the edit you made of cas and my jiwon, i look at it from time to time when i'm down ( ´ ▽ ` )

you mentioned that you have a preference for something more suggestive so i did my best to honor that! i will admit that this is the cropped version, but i will dm you a link to the full image! it isn't very explicit, just a glimpse of aiden's🍑 (which you can see in the timelapse dfd;lk) but i'm not taking any chances with tumblr lol. view under the cut!

the whole time i was drawing this i couldn't help but think about how cold it must be to wear a dress that short at this time of the year but thankfully aiden has evie to warm him right up!

speaking of which, i love how in-depth you write them!! i'm pretty sure i've read almost everything about aiden and evie on your blog while i drew this haha

happy holidays, i hope you like it! 💛 (p.s. if i forget to dm you pls reach out! my brain isn't always with me these days lmao)

@choicesfandomappreciation thank you again for hosting this event! it's always such a blast <3

timelapse bc yeah! :

(yes i struggled with the anatomy lol)

[aspiringtrashpanda]

My Nightbringer Season 3 Thoughts

Alright. Here we go. I have so many thoughts and I needed to write them all out. Please do not proceed past the cut unless you have completed Nightbringer lesson 60, for LOTS of spoilers lie ahead.

FIRST OFF, I want to acknowledge that this is being written prior to reading lesson 60 HARD because I have to finish lesson 59 HARD first and I need to yap.

SECONDLY, I want to say that I am not hating on the writers here AT ALL. Nightbringer has always been a slow burn. It was set up that way. The writers were absolutely forced into a corner here and had to wrap a long story up speedy quick and they did what they could in a short period of time. As someone who loves long fics and slow burns, I like to think I understand where they were trying to go with the story, and I do genuinely feel like the overall point of the Nightbringer season 3 art makes perfect sense, but the execution leaves more to be desired for a multitude of reasons. 

So, let’s get into it.

WHAT WORKED

THE RAD SCIENCE FAIR

This may be a controversial opinion, but I believe the Science Fair was a great inclusion as it mirrors the progression of the human world over the years. Hear me out: considering we are spanning thousands of years here, it’s worth looking at the mentality of the human race over history. For a long time faith in your chosen religion was considered the answer to most troubles, and only in more recent history have we seen a shift towards a reliance on science and modern technology. 

It is important to note that I am an atheist, though I strongly believe in freedom of religion. I’m drawing from basic observation here, and am not well-versed in the details of religion and science, but I do think it’s fair to say that we as a species have gone from believing illnesses to be due to demonic possession to looking for a more scientific reason why we’re coughing up blood. THUS, I think the Devildom Science Fair is a cool way to show this progression, but it leaves one problem: We don’t know the Celestial Realm’s views on all of this. See the next section on WHAT DIDN’T WORK for more on this. 

The Science Fair did present numerous opportunities for light shenanigans with the cast that hint to other things going on, which has been Nightbringer’s modus operandi since the beginning. There is absolutely an issue with pacing here, however, but I will cover that later and again, not the writers’ fault. Regardless, the Science Fair started off strong. We had a great brotherly moment with Asmodeus and Leviathan, Mammon managed to win by still doing things his own way, and Satan shone in Beelzebub’s arc (RIP Beel, I’m so sorry.) Not to mention the slow reveal that something is going on with MC’s powers due to the time jumps and that there is unrest in the Devildom by those who don’t agree with Diavolo’s values and projects as the stand-in leader of the Devildom. We got a lot of information in between the lines, which is what Nightbringer does best.

On top of that, if the goal of the Science Fair was to a) introduce the biology component with the genes to aid in returning Simeon to exclusively a human, and b) culminate with the whole power imbalance that has the moon wanting to… fuck the MC or whatever, idk, changing the order in which the subjects are presented would have been beneficial. See the next section on WHAT DIDN’T WORK for more on this. 

SIMEON'S ARC

It was clear from the moment it was revealed that the MC was returning to the original timeline that Simeon would be in the spotlight in Nightbringer season 3. Simeon’s corruption arc (or redemption arc) was executed well for the most part. Simeon’s motives and desires were in line with his character, and there was growth in his decision to try and work towards becoming an angel again, because he would still be part of the group regardless of his species. 

Simeon saying “To me, it’s not so much ‘what I am’ as ‘who I’m with’ that matters” is a great way to summarize his little character arc. We’ve seen him thrive in caretaker roles (with Luke, of course), but it’s important that we acknowledge how badly he’s always wanted to be a part of the family the brothers have made for themselves. By refusing to become a demon, he’s fulfilling a caretaker role by providing company for Luke and Raphael, but he’s doing it on his own terms, understanding that he is loved no matter what. 

It was cute watching the cast worry so much about Simeon, and really give their all to try and help him. The explanation in Lesson 58 that the Ring of Light purified the demonic energy from Simeon was very important, because at first I was just like… Simeon, you can’t just say you aren’t going to be a demon anymore and be cured. It doesn’t work like that, honey. BUT THEN AGAIN, we don’t know that because we have no idea how ideology in the Celestial Realm has changed over the years. This ties in perfectly with one of the main goals of the Science Fair, and how it would have worked well if executed better.

RAPHAEL'S ARC

Oh, sweet Raphael, you were absolutely supposed to be integrated into the intimacy system at this point in the initial planning. I’m sure of it. I don’t have too much to say on this, other than that it was some nice exposure on how lonely the Celestial Realm is. Which makes you wonder: is the Celestial Realm pretty empty or is Raphael simply mourning the loss of his closer friends? Again, there have been thousands of years since the brothers fell to now, and yet Raphael hasn’t made too many important new relationships in the Celestial Realm? Is there a lack of angels? Is this because of science being considered treasonous to Father and it’s increase of relevance in the modern world? 

Questions aside, it was really nice to get a spotlight on Raphael and how much the rest of the cast mean to him/how much the rest of the cast care about him (lookin’ at you, Mephisto). 

WHAT DIDN'T WORK

PACING, FORESHADOWING AND CHARACTER SPOTLIGHTS

Big sigh. Let’s talk about the devil elephants in the room right now, shall we? The last 5 or so lessons in this season were SO RUSHED, it was laughable. Multiple characters got completely bulldozed by the looming end of the season, and it was so frustrating as a Leviathan fan to get hardly any quality time with him (sorry to Belphie fans too, my goodness). Again, this is not the fault of the writers at all, but I would like to present that the season should have ended with the fallout from Raphael’s breakdown in Babel. 

In my personal opinion, the main goal of season 3 should have been to return Simeon to human status, and the main goal of season 4 should have been to address the power imbalance due to the time jumping. As I mentioned earlier, Obey Me! has always excelled at providing information and foreshadowing between the lines. If the Devildom Biology and Devildom Studies competitions had been held earlier in the season (ideally after the Devildom Information Science finals), with outcomes indirectly related to Simeon’s genes and the magic of the moon, it would have noted something like genetics and historical magical surges in a manner that would foreshadow what is to come, hinted through shenanigans like with the trip to Meowcao. Then, season 3 would end with Raphael’s meltdown, Simeon deciding he doesn’t want to be a demon, and the Science Fair being put on hold momentarily for everyone to catch their bearings. Starting in season four, we could add so much more about MC’s protective magic surges, with Belphie and Satan inching closer to the truth about the time travel, and the magic balance being thrown off in the Devildom. Then, the entirety of what happened in lesson 60 would make much more sense and wouldn’t feel like it was just thrown at us out of nowhere. Not that the writers had any control over that, though. If only we were able to get one more season 😭

CELESTIAL REALM POINT OF VIEW

Someone in one of the servers I’m in mentioned that it’s annoying that we’re being given scientific solutions for moral consequences that were emphasized in the original game, and that’s why I think it’s possible the writers were trying to show the progression of science over many, many years. However, having no insight into how this progression is affecting the Celestial Realm creates confusion instead of intrigue. We are not given any clue to believe that “He” or “Father” has changed his stance on what is considered treason to the Celestial Realm. So to go from more ethical and moral reasons to cast beings out of the Celestial Realm, to sciencing away demon genes seems bizarre. Why would Simeon be welcomed back into the Celestial Realm because they forced the genes from his body? If he’s still being punished for a lack of loyalty to “Him”, then he hasn’t atoned for that at all. 

And then, if it was alluded to that the Celestial Realm was willing to incorporate science into their forgiveness system, that still opens so many more questions regarding the reason the brothers fell in the first place. Would they be cast out of the Celestial Realm now? Of course, they would absolutely choose to remain in the Devildom if given the choice, but if both Simeon and Lucifer and co. were punished for acts of love (familial or romantic or platonic, just love in general) and Simeon is welcomed back while still standing by his choices, some sort of acknowledgement of how things have changed for the better would help tidy things up. We all live and learn, so if that’s the argument that the Celestial Realm wants to make, it needs to be a bit more clear. 

Of course, Simeon does not officially return to angel status by the end of lesson 60, but he is invited to return to talk to Michael, so that’s kind of a big deal. Who knows what will happen next (if we continue on this story in another way, or something).

LOOSE ENDS

It’s time to talk about Nightbringer. I have… so many thoughts on who Nightbringer is, but there is no point in going into that because we will never, ever know, apparently. Leaving things vague is cool and all, but there’s a difference between “vague enough to theorize” and just “so vague it’s irrelevant”, and unfortunately the end of Nightbringer drifts into the territory of the latter. It no longer matters why MC was sent to the past to create a power imbalance (because isn’t that something–was MC sent to the past to make the pacts again and therefore cause a power imbalance that would draw the moon in and help a nameless demon usurp the throne/another realm gain an advantage over the Devildom?), because nothing ever comes of it, which is super unsatisfying. 

There are other loose ends of course, too, but I’m too tired from writing all this to think about that right now, so feel free to talk about it in the comments. 

FORCED LUCIFER KISS

Listen, I groaned so loud at this. I like Lucifer as a character but I cannot stand him as a romantic interest, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels this way. Yes, the game absolutely supports polyamory and that’s cool and all, but I don’t wanna kiss Lucifer, okay. He is not part of my polycule and he never will be smh. 

(sir why did you have to smooch me right in front of Levi?! His little hummingbird heart can’t take it and we all know I only wanna be with him.)

ANYWAY, thank you for coming to my TEDTalk. I needed to get this all off my chest. I love Obey Me! so much and I believe this IP has so much potential. I truly hope we can be optimistic about the future, but I know that’s hard to do right now. I’m here if anyone needs to talk about Nightbringer ending, and I still intend to create content for these silly characters 💕

[hermanoga]

I mean I know not everybody is aware of (😭pls pls read the queer bard) Shakespeare's sonnets being famous/infamous for its homoerotic celebration of love, but like, Link Click itself is a very Intertexually rich piece of media. If allusions from canonical authors appear, I think we should not ignore the cultural codes, which in this case talks about a larger literary and socio-intellectual tradition of homoerotic 'Platonic' love.

(My English lit major ass can't resist this time, so I am gonna discuss a few things now)

'Platonic' love ain't Platonic at all

Don't worry you didn't read it wrong. The long semantic evolution of this word has given rise to a word which has acquired a completely different connotation. Many times, it is weaponized to deliberately alleviate queer bondings. But the etymological history of this word locates itself into the Classical tradition of male male homoerotic tradition, the most famous example being a Socratic Dialogue by Plato called The Symposium . The word 'Platonic' comes from the philosopher Plato. It's a long dialogue which explores the themes of love and eroticism along with its ethical, philosophical and social necessities. There are people in the dialogue who talk about some idealised version of non-sexual love but Plato's view (which comes in the resolution of the Socratic Dialogue) is that love is a very erotic, intimate bond that occurs between two male.

I will not go deep into the debate between Socrates and Diotima which revolves around this question : which kind of love is superior? Love between men and women or between two men?

The larger implication is what we are looking for : which kind of love gives you immortality

Socrates suggests that the love between two 'equal' individuals who are intellectually on the same level, their kind of mutual and reciprocal love creates immortal art, which ensures the immortality of the lovers.

Shakespeare and the homoerotic tradition in the Renaissance period

Shakespeare following the Classical tradition Renaissance period adopted writes his 'Young man' sonnets; love, time, immortality are the central themes.

In this sequence of sonnets, there are Time sonnets. Shakespeare has this overarching obsession and anxiety with the concept of time which culminate in sonnet 64 :

Ruin hath taught me thus to ruminate:

That time will come and take my love away.

This thought is as a death, which cannot choose

But weep to have which it fears to lose.

If this is not Lu Guang...

About the sonnets specifically and explicitly mentioned in Link Click (In the promotional video of Surprising Click where Liu Xiao is seen reading those four sonnets specifically), here is the Twitter link below you can read :

it's @luguangbread on twitter. Please read it, they wrote beautifully.

Now there is a bonus.

Another famous treatise on friendship (homoerotic, intimate) the tradition of male-male love is Laelius de Amicitia (or On Friendship). Even though Amicitia is not explicitly featured, Cicero's words do feature in the visual codes of 'The Eye'

pasting the Twitter link again, if you are interested, consider giving it a read

@centofu and @XinRuixxAG translated those Latin phrases.

Talking about 'friendship', it also has a very very interesting semantic background, across cultures. Asia has its own linguistic Ars Erotica (as Michel Foucault identifies the traditions of China, India and Japan to have this form of traditional eroticism. On the contrary, Western values modelled upon Victorian notions of Scientia Sexualis deliberately problematizes erotic encounters, restraining them within medico-legal binary categories - HoMoSeXuALiTy and hEtErOsExUaLiTY ~ History of Sexuality) which DOES NOT draw a clear division between friendship and erotic relationships. The South Asian cultural and linguistic background I come from, accommodate this queer-blurring of erotic friendships. In old folk songs, the soulmates/unrequited lovers/lovers in exile are addressed as 'friends'. Remember the name of Edward Carpenter's seminal book, Ioläus : Anthology of friendship.

(my god) I accidentally wrote a short discourse on 'friendship' and its queer connotation? BWAHAHAHA

Why am I telling you all this?

it's again @centofu with their genius mind finding and decoding the cipher Haoling so meticulously provided us with 'The Eye'. On a side note, the amount of intellectual discussion and god level deduction this fandom engages with to decode the significance of each minute detail make me very happy. I am very proud to be a part of this fandom. A show like Link Click deserves this level of dedication!

Anyway,

the cipher appears in a book Lu Guang was holding before the camera pans to the 'dead wife' montage of Cheng Xiaoshi. (Btw please please please read the original twitter threads, share among your friends and fellow shippers)

Now it's clear as broad daylight that the speaker is Lu Guang and the 'friend' is Cheng Xiaoshi. Haoling could have provided these lines in modern English but no, he deliberately uses the Renaissance English (the English Shakespeare used), so we have to look at the terms with their contemporary connotation, not the modern one. After all that discussion on friendship, I hope you understand how poignantly queer and melancholic those lines are. It also echoes Shakespearean themes.

The young man/muse reading the sonnets and realising how deeply and agonisingly the poet speaker loves him? Trying to save him from 'Time's fell hand'? The poet speaker not caring about himself at all and wanting all his love to celebrate the fair youth's beauty for eternity? Come here Cheng Xiaoshi, we have to talk.

Cheng Xiaoshi, why r u reading Shakespearean sonnets about lust, misogyny, acrimony and ostensibly homoeroticism? No reason. Just curious.

[atombonniebaby]

Okay, but apparently, yesterday marked my 2yr autism diagnosis anniversary!

Needless to say...

I have embraced the fuck out of it!

Tumblr lets me share my favoritest little guy with other humans! I love you all!

There is a reason I like to take screenshots. (Note the mug warmer for all that coffee/tea I used to let go cold.)

All my Oversized 🙌🏻 COMFY🙌🏻 Tees ❤️

I'm also hanging with the cat (literally...I'm in a hammock chair!) - her name is Mia as she is a dick. (in an adoring way)

(Oh and it'll be 3yrs in October for the ADHD diagnosis...but I'll probably forget about that...so have an 'I didn't know I was ADHD' memory)

As you were...

[patheticbatman]

I haven't seen any posts about this yet but l've seen some fan art that makes me feel this needs to be said:

Don't forget Leah Sava Jeffries has darker skin when making Annabeth Chase fan art!

She is much closer to Lupita Nyong'o than Zoe Kravitz when it comes to shading, reflection, and complementary color usage :).

Lighting for dark skin is different on light skin. Light skin gets changed by lighting, and dark skin reflects the lighting. Below is a lovely shot of Nyong'o's character from Wakanda Forever in mourning. The filmmakers emphasize the umber qualities of her skin in contrast to the funereal white and (arguably harsh) light across her shoulder below.

Try to pick spots that aren't directly in or near the light, and try mixing 3 or more! You can put it into a color mixer online, or even color pick, lower the opacity, and lay the shades over each other until you find one that fits. And of course, the more 'realistic' you want to go with shading and lighting, the more shades you're going to want to be able to explore vivaciously :D.

Let's take a look at the same 3 beautiful actresses I mentioned at the beginning, with a bad color picked area and a better-ish color picked area. (Please keep in mind, these are not perfect comparisons, as I was not able to find pictures of all 3 actresses under the same kind of lighting.)

Kravitz's has a clear difference between the two, but they aren't too far apart, in comparison to Nyong’o’s and Jeffries’s. Note the dullness in the poorly picked shades as opposed to the better ones. Also keep in mind that while Kravitz has a rosy undertone (at least in that picture - it’s from The Batman, which has stylized coloring) Nyong’o has a slight cool undertone (I can’t pin down quite what, but the picture is definitely not stylized like Kravitz’s).

Jeffries runs more ochre or russet, but neither of those are pink. They are more red than terracotta or umber, but to call Jeffries’s face rosy would be wrong. Err more towards the golden when drawing her.

^^saved an image from a writing tutorial long ago, but can’t seem to find it. If someone recognizes it, I’ll link it. EDIT: it’s from this post. Thanks @autumnrowancollector ! <3

And also, the darker skin gets, the less likely warm undertones are going to appear. Don't be afraid to use blue or purple or even green on occasion!

Additionally, cool lighting on dark skin is always a win imo.

(I was going to use that picture of Jeffries as Annabeth by the lightning bolt, but then I realized the lighting on her face doesn’t quite match up with where it should hit from that angle, and I realized they kind of just turned everything bluer, so screenshot time!)

(Also if you want another really great live action example, check out anything Aldis Hodge is in, like Leverage and Black Adam)(and of course there’s Spiderverse <3 but I want to post pictures of Hodge)

Now, to here’s a list of more experienced people’s advice:

Black facial features & hair

Shading digitally for a (somewhat) monotone Black character

Stylistic choices and places to start looking for inspiration (besides a search engine).

Coloring Black people’s lips

A better coloration tutorial

Also a nice tutorial for Indigenous skin tones, just in case yall want to draw Piper or use this information for other dark skinned characters :).

EDIT: Some actresses who are closer in skintone to use for Annabeth, provided by the lovely @blackfemmecharacterdependency ! If you can’t find a reference for Jeffries in a specific lighting, maybe check out these ladies’ pictures! It’s a reblog, so scroll down.

TLDR: Don’t make Annabeth pink and pale, make her dark and golden.

[dykedvonte]

I keep seeing fanarts of ppl's OC's being on the ship, so do you think that if there was 6st crewmember (specifically, another woman) Anya would've been more safe? Like, someone to actually call Jimmy's begaviour out, someone Anya might wanna trust? Is there a possibility something might have changed (even if a little) or it would not have mattered at all?

-💀

I feel like the game would make it part of the commentary on where she would believe and help Anya but still be sort of dismissive? Like the whole “don’t waste time crying and being scared keep going and move on, don’t let him win”. It’s supposed to be positive and reinforcing but sometimes it does more damage in those times of mourning and grief, it feels patronizing, like you don’t understand what you’re going through but they do. Even if they did call out his behavior it’s still on Curly to act and while another voice would help, it’s still 4 against 2 on guys that don’t get it until they have to vs women who always have to.

I don’t mind mouthwashing OCs but I do get a bit bored as they tend to be borderline saviors or like Jimmy aligned. They are either more complicit than Curly or just Jimmy haters for no reason, outside of what the creators know about what he did to Anya. I am never irked by OCs but in a story like mouthwashing you really need to think about what your character adds to the commentary, especially if they are there during the crash. It’s nice to have like characters on Anya’s side more whole heartedly and interesting to see characters who placate Jimmy but sometimes it’s one note.

I can’t and don’t want to police peoples OCs it’s never my intention when I comment on trends I notice, but I do feel like the way people make their OCs interact with these two characters and especially Curly, really show a grave misunderstanding of the narrative and these characters as people vs roles in the story. Still, I know people just make up characters for fun and that’s fine. Great even, but I guys I’m focusing more on OCs that are supposed to have those serious dynamics. My favs tend to be pretty-Tulpar or post-Tulpar au OCs.

The inevitably of the crash is on Jimmy. He did that not because he wasn’t stopped but because all his means to kill Anya were taken. The gun, the axe. Even if Curly did strip him of his co-pilot privileges and try to keep him contained there’s only so many people. An extra body helps but they have jobs they have to do, he’s the only one steering the whole ship and Jimmy would likely have an out: food, bathroom, etc. He’s not new and if he couldn’t crash the ship directly, who’s to say he wouldn’t sabotage something else? A clunker like the Tulpar wouldn’t take much. An extra person helps but it’s just another thing that prolongs what a person like Jimmy is willing to do to shirk responsibility.

It’s more than just needing someone to stand up to him and think that’s what is missing when it comes to inserting a character into the mouthwashing setting.

[raenegade-accio]

.

[amethystina]

hey i hope you're doing fine <3 i just wanted to drop by and scream over the recent WHTD chapter, you blew me away with the perfectly written gut wrenching yearning like i. was. on. the. floor. yohan literally being unable to ignore a distressed gaon even tho he is literally dying himself we love to see it!! and gaon with the hoodie??? oh my sweet boy, i feel bad for you (even tho you bought this upon yourself lol) anyways i can't wait to see where we go from here, i can't express enough just how excited i am for their journey...

while we're on that topic, i was recently re-reading 'it is mine to avenge' and as we know, they are established in that fic and it got me so curious on how that happened like what led to that first kiss and who initiated it? would you be so kind to entertain me cuz i cannot stop thinking ab it lol (also im going to absolutely lose it when they finally kiss in WHTD like im scared for myself)

ok i'll shut up now, thank you for your beautiful stories they bring me so much comfort and joy, you and your works are so so loved so thank you <33 i hope you're feeling better now and please take care of yourself!! <3

I'm so glad you enjoyed the latest chapter! That last scene with Ga On and Yo Han was so very heartbreaking to write because they both yearn so incredibly much but have their reasons for trying to hold back. And it has reached the point where not even Yo Han is in full control anymore, his desire to help and protect Ga On overruling his iron will. I think that says a lot.

And yeah, the hoodie scene made me feel bad for Ga On but also made me want to shake my head at him. Ga On, my sweet baby deer — you are a disaster.

But a disaster I adore, so he's got that going for him, at least.

I hope the rest of the journey will be enjoyable as well! The coming chapters are going to be full of scenes I've been dying to write for ages — and I mean that literally since I've been writing this fic for three years now. Hopefully, you will find them as exciting as I do!

As for It Is Mine to Avenge, it was Ga On who initiated their first kiss, which Yo Han points out in the story itself:

"And Yo Han knew — had known, from the very first time Ga On had kissed him, bold and unafraid — that he would never find that anywhere else."

Aside from that, the only detail I've decided on is that they didn't get together until after the drama. But I can't say if it was days, weeks, or months after. Or exactly what the scene looked like. Mainly because it wasn't relevant to the main story and, in some ways, I want to leave it as open as possible for my readers to decide for themselves.

I mean, some might even want to put It Is Mine to Avenge in the same universe as Who Holds the Devil, which is totally fine by me.

Like, we're not even at the one-year mark after the drama in Who Holds the Devil and It Is Mine to Avenge is set two years after Yo Han faked his death. So it's possible 😉 And Yo Han never mentions exactly what it is that Ga On does to bring change and fight for equality. It could be the Justice Project. But it could also be something else entirely. It's your choice!

... and I guess that means I just spoiled who will kiss who first in Who Holds the Devil but I think that's pretty obvious by now considering Yo Han's desire to be chosen. He's not going to be the one to kiss Ga On because he wants Ga On to pick him and show how much he wants to be with him — even if it means Yo Han is going to be waiting for a while still.

(Also: No, I'm not saying that It Is Mine to Avenge and Who Holds the Devil are in the same universe, but I'm not going to stop anyone from having that as their headcanon)

So yeah! I've intentionally left things vague in It Is Mine to Avenge because I didn't want to ruin anyone's theories. Which I guess is the boring answer since you wanted to be entertained? Sorry about that 😂

I know I say I have a plan for almost everything and that's still true, it just so happens that my plan this time was to not have an answer because I thought it would be more interesting for people to come up with their own theories and ideas.

So, really, a better question would be what YOU think led to that first kiss 😉

Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. I admit I really need them right now because things are, unfortunately, not getting any better. I still haven't recovered from my burnout but there's a risk I have to go back to working full-time anyway because of bureaucracy. And I'm kind of scared of what that will do to my overall health, both mental and physical. And having to deal with that anxiety is exhausting all on its own, never mind the strain of working full-time.

Plus, my former stepdad (my mum and he broke up about two years ago but were together for twenty years so he's been there for more than half of my life) is in the hospital with sepsis. They found bacteria in his heart and he's currently getting antibiotics every sixth hour in an attempt to keep it from killing him 🙃

So, uh, life is kind of shit? I've barely had time to deal with the previous loss and now I'm terrified I'll be hit with another.

(It probably won't happen since he's being carefully monitored and he sounds surprisingly cheerful for someone who's going to be pumped full of antibiotics for four weeks straight, but yeah. Tell that to my brain)

So thank you, truly, for caring about me and for all the kindness. It means a lot to me 💜

[elizabethzoopzoop986]

I miss Mei so much you don’t understand :( bring her back AidaIro. Also Yako and Hakubo

I hate how the school mysteries (other than Hanako, Mitsuba and Akane) get there one arc where you really get to know them and care about them and then they just go away forever. GIVE THEM BACK PLS AIDAIRO LET THEM OUT OF THE CLOSET THEYVE DONE NOTHING WRONG