#not that most doctors are any good at treating it either
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naamahdarling · 1 year ago
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misstycloud · 1 month ago
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Yandere visual novel games recommendations
These are all free to download from itch.io on computer. I’m not sure if any of these could work on any other device but most probably not. All of these games aren’t finished either and it’s the demo you play. Still, you have content to play and it doesn’t end after 5 minutes, I promise.
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14 Days With You- by cutiesai
Here’s a link to the official tumblr blog
OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:
"14 Days With You" is an upcoming romantic horror visual novel centred around Ren, a mysterious individual who seems more than obsessed with you — and is willing to do anything he can to have you.
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Prescription:LOVE - by Livingslime
OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:
"You wake up in a hospital with no memory of how you got there. A kind and attentive doctor assures you that you will be under his care, patiently nursing you back to health. No one seems to know what caused your condition. "
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The Kid at the Back - by Fantasia | TealCat
OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:
"There's this guy, pretty tall guy, often times people don't even realize he's there but he is. Usually sits at the back, wears nothing but black. His eyes however, were bright, red as the autumn leaves, and they for sure aren't leaving your eyes once you lock with his."
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Heart Cage - by rice love coffee
OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:
You are a detective who has just moved to a new town. You are involved in a serial killer case, and three mysterious residents (Or more?!) are approaching you!
Don't trust anyone! But... can you?
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Please Don’t Hate Christmas- (also) by rice love coffee
OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:
Yandere x Otome x Christmas x Urban Legend!!
You last celebrated Christmas a few years ago. This year, you returned to your hometown---Snowflake Island, with your childhood friend, Albert. Albert treats you so well that you choose to stay forever. However, you forgot something in the past, and it's still not solved...
(A/N: it was a long time since I played this ⬆️ but it shouldn’t have changed much- when I played it was really good. )
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janitorhutcherson · 1 year ago
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olderbf!mike who is 5 years older than you shows you how to do taxes. he breaks down everything, why they’re important, the due dates. he’s not exactly sure on how to himself but he’s figured out the best services to use, how to do any write offs and what paperwork you may need.
olderbf!mike who lets you move in with him. when the time comes, the two of you as well as abby set out on a trek to find a somewhat larger and nicer home. once you do, he teaches you about rent, how to manage money (the best that he can), and things about cars, financing, etc.
olderbf!mike (ft. stoner!mike) who smokes you out at night, grabbing the back of your head and leaning it back as he blows smoke into your mouth. sometimes he’ll hit a joint off of your chest or he will hold it in between his fingers for you to hit.
olderbf!mike who laughs at how naive you are, teasing you when you don’t know things that can only come from life experience. in response to this, you remind him that he’s your elder and he quickly shuts up, rolling his eyes and grumbling, throwing a miniature hissy fit.
olderbf!mike who calls you good girl, pretty girl, babydoll, and babygirl because that’s how he sees fit. if you prefer, he will just call you babydoll, whatever makes you most comfortable. he loves having his hands all over you, even in public to show that you’re his.
olderbf!mike that covers you in purple marks all across your skin, ensuring at first glance it’s obvious you are very much taken. it doesn’t take much for people to realize who, as all they have to do is follow your arm down to your hands that are tightly gripped into much larger calloused ones. a short but gruff man is always attached at the hip with you, either leading you so that your mind can go blank or following your every command.
olderbf!mike who fixes all of your mommy/daddy issues, taking care of you the best that he can. he helps to set up your doctors appointments, gets you little treats even when they’re somewhat childish, takes you out to dinner, watches movies with you and eats junk food. you take care of him and he only sees it fair to take care of you. he’s head over heels for you, and he’ll do everything to show you that.
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milkloafy · 6 months ago
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THE GENERAL GETS HURT — JIYAN
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⋆。˚ ❀ summary: in which jiyan overexerts himself in battle and you come rushing to the borderlands to make sure he’s okay. ⋆。˚ ❀ contents: 16+, fluff ⋆。˚ ❀ wc: 1.0k ⋆。˚ ❀ a/n: yk that one tweet that headcanons their tacet marks to be sensitive? yeah. :> my little tribute to jiyan in hopes of getting him soon,, good luck to anyone wishing for him who also still doesn’t have him </3
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It wasn’t always easy having a general as a partner. Long nights without him, not seeing him up to months on end, having to wait until the end of the day for him to call you saying he is safe and healthy. 
It especially wasn’t easy when one night, you didn’t get your usual call from him. And it was even more difficult when you received a call from the lieutenant informing you that Jiyan almost collapsed on the field after a hard-won battle from severe Forte overexertion.  
You found yourself rushing over from the safety of Jinzhou to the dangers of the Borderland. You weren’t a solider or a Resonator yourself. In fact, you worked in research for the development of medicine and occasionally helped Jiyan’s mother out in her practice. For that reason, Jiyan preferred if you did not show up unannounced— He always wanted to take proper steps to ensure your safety when you visited. 
But given the circumstances, you were sure he would understand. 
“Where is he?” you called, breathless from rushing over here. “Is he okay?”
The lieutenant nodded at you. “Commander Jiyan is doing better now. You can find him in his quarters.”
“Thank you!” 
You just about ran over to the General’s quarters to see him for yourself. When you entered the room, you saw him half-sitting, half-laying on his bed as he massaged the back of his neck. 
“Jiyan,” you cried, relieved to see he was upright and kicking. Giving him a once over to do a quick check of any physical ailments, you sighed. “You’re alive.”
If he was surprised to see you here, he certainly didn’t show it. Jiyan greeted you with a chuckle as you walked over to him. “Of course I’m alive. I wouldn’t just leave you behind like that.”
“Yet you almost did!” you scolded, taking a seat next to him and immediately looking at the back of his neck. “Look, your Tacet mark is still hurting you. You’re even rubbing your nape.”
“It no longer hurts,” he assured, bringing his hand down to his side. “It’s only a little sore. But I thank you for coming here, and I’m sorry for worrying you.” 
Jiyan wrapped an harm around you and brought you close to him. You leaned against his shoulder and he planted a kiss on your forehead. 
“I promise, I’m okay,” he said, rubbing soothing circles into your arm. “However, if you would like to massage my sore neck, I wouldn’t be opposed.” 
You grinned, slipping off from his bed and gesturing for him to lie down on his stomach. Once he turned over, you hopped up on the mattress and draped your legs on either side of him.
At the feeling of your weight on his lower back, Jiyan stirred. 
“I don’t believe the door was locked,” he stated, almost in warning. 
“I’m only giving you a massage,” you said innocently. “Tending to your injury, even.”
“This is certainly against the code of conduct for medical professionals,” he quipped back, teasing you. “Doctors should not treat their patients in such a way.”
However, the moment your hands found their way to his upper back, around his Tacet mark, he no longer made any remarks. You rubbed gentle, yet firm, circles on the nape of his neck, being careful not to touch his sensitive mark. Thankfully, it was no longer flickering or showing signs of overexertion, but you knew the after-effects were likely lingering still. 
As your hands ran across the smoothness of his muscular body, you felt him stir underneath you once more. You giggled at his response and leaned forward onto him, placing an airy kiss on his Tacet mark. Jiyan shivered at the light touch to one of his most sensitive areas.
“Are you okay down there?” you asked playfully. “Should I get off now?”
“No, please continue your treatment,” he said without hesitation.
You laughed and went on with your massage, not stopping at his neck and shoulders, but instead placing your hands on the small of his back to get rid of any knots as well. 
Once Jiyan felt his muscles loosen up from your treatment, he nodded in contentment and rolled his shoulders back. Before you could fully get yourself off him, he turned himself over and grabbed your thighs so you stayed straddling his waist. 
“Thank you for the massage,” said Jiyan, bringing his arms around your back to pull you down onto him. 
“Anything for General Jiyan,” you teased, kissing his nose as you hovered over him. “But please, try not to overexert yourself that much next time.”
“I know if I do, you’ll come up with the cure for it somehow.” 
“I would and not share it with you as your punishment,” you scowled. 
Jiyan laughed, sitting up on the bed, your legs still around him as he held you by the waist. “I will be careful, I promise you. Now, let’s make sure the door is locked so I can properly express my gratitude for your massage, and my apologies for making you worry.” 
You grinned as you locked your arms around his neck. He managed to get off the bed with you clinging onto him. With his hands under your thighs to prevent you from slipping, he walked over to the door of his quarters and locked it.
Once your privacy was secured, Jiyan pressed your back against the door and kissed the side of your neck. You squealed at the sudden touch and you felt him grin against your skin. 
“I will accept the gratitude and apology rewards now, General,” you declared, holding your head high. 
“Good,” he said, voice low and inviting. “I have a lot of gratitude to show you.”
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echoofadream · 6 months ago
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Your favorite patient...
Part 1
Summary: You are a hardworking doctor and you save a man's life. Wait, why is he coming back with all sorts of conditions? What do you mean he followed you home? He's begging to be your...what?
Contains: Obsessive behavior(yandere), stalking, mentions of masturbation, slight smut, dom!reader(gender is not specified), sub!male!yandere.
Imagine you work in a hospital. You're a workaholic doctor who simply loves treating people and helping them get healthier and better. You greet everyone with a smile and try to cheer up every person who comes in, despite their state. 
One day a young man is brought into the ER and you find out he had been in a horrible car accident. You don't waste any more time and treat his wounds and the next day he's already conscious and aware of everything happening around him. Yours is the first face he sees once awake.
The following days you visit him in his hospital room and ask him how he's feeling, the same honest and benevolent smile on your face. You can tell that he's exaggerating most of the time and that the pain he tells you he's experiencing is not as severe as he claims. So you do the only rational thing and discharge him.
Next week, he's back with another issue and he requests you specifically. An ear infection. It wasn't your area of expertise but you took a look and recommended him a qualified doctor. He left displeased.
One week later you saw him again. A stomach ache. It wasn't bad but he wouldn't have it. "You don't get it, doctor! It hurts!" he'd say and grab your wrist, putting it on his lower stomach. He wanted a set of tests. He was even willing to pay any sum of money! You actually ran the tests and he spent one night in the hospital. You should've paid more attention to the smile he had on his face when you came with his results. He wasn't pleased seeing a green line next to every word on the file, yet he understood the situation and left. "Thank you so much, doctor!" he said with a huge smile on his face. "I was so scared! What would I do without you?"
The following week he was in the ER again. Ibuprofen overdose. "I had a headache and didn't know what to do! Help me, doctor!" A part of you was starting to see a pattern, yet your overworked mind couldn't quite put the finger on the issue at hand. You treated him like any other patient. The same friendly smile on your face, the same soft tone of voice, the same tired eyes. You were busy saving lives everyday. This was your duty and you had to do it right. "Such a big heart you have, doctor!" the same adoration in his eyes when he says this as always. "You're amazing!" and you could've sworn you saw tiny hearts forming inside his dark pupils. You should drink less caffeine, really.
After a couple of days the man doesn't come into the ER. Yet you don't even notice his absence. You were so overworked, so tired! Poor you!
One random Thursday(a thoroughly planned day) you freeze when you step into your living room. A familiar person was sitting on your couch. You knew him from somewhere, but why was it so hard for you to remember?
"Hello, doctor!" he greets. The same smile, the same excited voice. And you recognized him. "Don't tell me you don't know who I am..." he started, a bit of disappointment making its way into his facial expression.
You were standing there, unable to move. What was your patient doing inside your house? How did he know where you lived? How did he get inside? Why did he get inside? Was he dange-
"You don't look too pleased to see me, doctor..." he says, a small frown on his face. He approaches you and you instinctively take a step back. "Don't be afraid. I'd never hurt you." his words were either as honest as they could be or he was one hell of a liar. The former sounded better. "You're good and kind and gentle. I'd never hurt you" he chuckled. That makes you make another step back.
"What are you doing here?" you ask, breathlessly.
"I'm here for you, isn't that obvious?"
It was very obvious but you were hoping he'd elaborate.
"You work so hard, doctor" he starts talking in a pitiful, saddened voice. "You work overtime almost everyday. You always come back home late. You don't even have time to cook and you always order takeaway. Then you sit in front of the TV with a glass of wine in your hand, drifting off with god knows what series in the background." He chuckles. "Well, I know actually.".
He takes another step towards you and you flinch. "I wanna make you feel good, doctor" he tells you, almost whimpering. "You work so hard...it's a pity you don't have a slave at home to take care of each and every one of your needs"
Did he just say slave?
"I've been following you ever since you saved my life, doctor. I owe you!". He puts a hand over his heart, trying to show you just how much he loves you. "I know everything you do. I know you barely have a social life, or a sleep schedule or time for yourself except for the moments when you lay on your back on the bed, your glass on the bedside table and you...touch yourself." He blushed at his own words. Meanwhile, you were going through the five stages of fear. If they didn't exist until now, well now they did.
"You don't have any time to clean this place either. I know, since I try not to cough when I lay under your bed and listen to your moans every night." A huge smile spreads across his face. "God, you're amazing..." .
Your hand goes to the pocket of your coat and, as soon as he sees you, his face darkens.
"Doctor...I told you I'm not here to hurt you" His tone held some sort of threat and that made you the more afraid. Your fingers wrap around your phone and you pull it out. He grabs your wrist, stopping you. "You're not gonna do that!" he screams. "You're gonna make me yours! You're gonna do it!".
The sound of your palm making contact with his cheek echoed in the room. He bends forward a little, covering his red cheek and whining softly. He looks at you with fear in his eyes, but you needed to be blind not to see the arousal that fear created. He drops to his knees, hands on his thighs, head lowered.
"I'm sorry, doctor!" he whines. "I shouldn't have yelled at you! Please forgive me! Please! Forgive me for being such a bad boy..." .
You look at him with a shocked expression. It was crystal clear that he was living inside his own world of make-believe in which you were the master and he was the slave. It was obvious he'd wanted it ever since he first saw you. And that he wouldn't take 'no' for an answer.
You smirk, all the previously felt fear having already vanished. After all, everything he said was right. You were exhausted and you needed someone to serve you. You deserved it, didn't you? Weren't you that god sent person who saved this poor boy's life? Why not give him what he wants? Why not...give yourself what you want?
"You followed me home" you start, your tone as assertive as you could make it. You could see his body shiver and that only made you keep going. "You broke into my house multiple times. You stalked me!"
A soft whimper escapes the man in front of you. He tries to lift his head, to look at you with those big pleading puppy eyes of his, to show you how very sorry he felt(not in the slightest) for doing all that. But when you snap at him he lowers his head again.
"You gave yourself medical conditions so that I could treat you! What kind of sick fuck does that?"
He moaned when he heard your degrading words, lifting his head and looking you straight in the eyes, a big smile on his face.
"I'm sick, doctor. I'm very sick..."
You laughed at his wordplay. "I think you've been a bad boy. A bad sick naughty boy. You know what bad boys get?" You smirk, waiting for his answer.
"Punishment!" he yells, his eagerness immeasurable. "They get punishment. Please, doctor..."
"Please, what?"
"Please....punish me"
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!
If this goes well I'll write the second part(smut ofc).
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tbaluver · 23 days ago
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Spending Halloween With Them- The Love And DeepSpace Men
parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre/ tags: fluff, slightly silly, might be ooc maybe a/n: hi everyone! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა happy halloween! are any of you all dressing up? :o what are you guys plans! lmk <3 i apologize if im late i know it might not even be halloween for some of you when i post this but i hope you still enjoy ! if you don't celebrate it, i hope you still have a happy day <3
⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
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Xavier:
Xavier didn’t celebrate or see the appeal of Halloween before until he saw on his phone of couples doing festive activities together. Whether it was you or him that suggested doing anything for this month, he wanted to spend these experiences with you this season and every single one in the future.
Peanut Butter and Jelly Costumes. He might accidentally misread your text and accidentally dress up as an actual peanut costume while you dress up as a jar of jelly.
Honey and Bear Costume. This was his idea because you’re his ‘honey’ so it was very fitting for him to dress up as a bear well because-
Prince and Princess Costume. He would definitely look good as a Prince but he’s not dressing up by himself without his princess. Unless you had a different costume in mind, he doesn’t mind wearing the prince costume by himself
He wouldn’t mind giving out candy or doing trick or treating with you but he most prefers cuddling with you while watching a spooky movie. Does not flinch when a scary scene comes up but he’ll make sure to pull up the blanket over you when you’re scared.
If you two were to go trick or treating he'll make sure to give you all your favorite sweets on your pile and will take the ones you don't want.
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Zayne:
Doctor Costume. Not just any doctor, a neurosurgeon doctor. He would explain to you that being a neurosurgeon is a costume because it’s different from his job and that he already had his costume set up. Of course he does. You would have to explain to him that he needs to find a different costume that’s not a doctor. A costume that doesn’t involve him similarly from his real job.
Vampire Costume. When he finally caves, which didn’t take that long, he took your suggestion on being a vampire. A vampire usually looks very sophisticated and elegant which was already fitting for him so all he needed was the cape and some fake fangs
Before you both started to give out candy, you both took a stroll around your neighborhood to appreciate the decorated neighborhood in the area.
Your shared home would be decorated for Halloween. Just right outside your door would be the pumpkins you both lovingly carved and selected together from the pumpkin patch. They all sit together with a candlelight flickering inside them to illuminate the intricate designs you both made.
It wasn’t even close to midnight and almost all of your fun size candy and chocolates are gone. Until you found the culprit in the kitchen caught red-handed as he was about to unwrap the next one in his hand. You guys might have to visit the dentist next week.
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Rafayel:
Rafayel didn't really understand why humans dress up and beg random people for candy on this day so he's never really done anything for it. But if you wanted to do something with him for Halloween, with no hesitation he try to do anything with you.
He’s either the type to dress up with the most intricate and well thought out costume that he had made throughout the year with you. It would either be dramatic and some high quality costume or he’s the type to dress up as something very specific. Like a random scenario specific to mess with you. “I’m you when you slipped in the shower.” or he’ll dress up as a silly looking fish and say that it’s you.
He would have SO many ideas of what costumes you both could do or what would look good on you that he ended up making all the costumes in the end. I think he would love dressing you up as Lemurian the most, thinking you would look embody the beauty. So the whole day was just a fun little dress up day for you both and many many photos of you saved with your beautiful or silly costumes.
He would also definitely uses his artistic skills to carve out the most beautiful pumpkins with you.
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Sylus:
Vampire Costume. Do I need to say more? Kids would ask, if they weren't scared of him, if his crimson eyes were real and he would definitely act the part and play vampire.
Red Riding Hood and The "Big Bad" Wolf costume. He loves the color red on you and the way the corset of your dress compliments your figure.
Devil and Angel Costume. A little basic costume if you two didn't have enough time to prepare a matching one. Although he does love seeing the color red on you, you are his angel and his dove so he doesn't mind being the devil.
You two would enjoy the evening by the cozy fireplace as you wait for the trick-or-treaters to knock on your door. He would pour you a cup of your favorite drink before he pours himself a glass of wine.
He’s definitely the house known for handing out the biggest candy bars and secretly loves it when he hears how children think his home is the coolest because of the mountains of candy he’s given them.
He does give out a little too much but he wants to make sure every kid leaves with an overflowing bag. Honestly he probably bought a warehouse full of candy so you don’t run out for the night.
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batmanisagatewaydrug · 5 months ago
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would you like to tell us about your research on virginity?
but also...wdym STIs aren't as scary as we think??? I was told most of them are incurable? I know you can make aids untrasmittable and that they've even succeded in curing it a couple times but that's about it. I would love to be educated about this
yeah, the basic idea with the virginity project was that the whole concept of virginity is pretty bullshit in the context in which it was initially significant, namely cisgender women being penetrated by cisgender men, so as soon as you take it outside of that context by introducing gay and trans sexuality it totally falls apart. I mean, hell, it stops working if you even look at two cishet people doing literally anything OTHER than penis-in-vagina sex. I tripped up so many people initially when I started asking questions like "okay, so you don't think a woman loses her virginity from a man going down on her. so what if it's two women? what's the difference?" and just really getting people to face down their very penis-centered view of the sex, to the result of several people telling me that it kind of made them reevaluate what they actually think of as the first time they had sex. it's also fascinating to either read other people's accounts or discuss firsthand how queer people have either tried to make themselves fit into the binary of virginity - queer man disagreeing over whether or not you have to have penetrative anal sex to lose your virginity or oral sex is sufficient, a fascinating case of a lesbian who felt that have sex with other cis women didn't "count" and asked a cis male friend to have sex with her just so she could feel satisfied that she'd lost her virginity - or abandon it entirely. Hanne Blank's book Virgin was a formative starting point, and it really exploded for me from there.
as for the STIs - hey, bad news! you fell victim to the scare tactics used to make people afraid of sex! almost all sexually transmitted infections are very easy to treat and cure with the right medicine, which is why it's important to get tested regularly and check in with your healthcare provider at the first sign of something amiss. pubic lice, scabies, trichomoniasis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis - all of those are pretty easy to get rid of with some help from your doctor and a run to the pharmacy!
the major exceptions are the 4 H's: herpes, HIV, HPV, and hepatitis B.
herpes is with you forever but is an incredibly mild companion to share your body with, considering most people never experience any notable symptoms and those who do can curb the severity with medicine.
it's also worth noting that herpes is so common as to be virtually ubiquitous; the World Health Organization consistently estimates that somewhere around 80% of the world's adult population is carrying herpes simplex virus 1 or herpes simplex virus 2. a great deal of those people don't even get it from having sex, but rather by catching HSV-1 from a parent or other people they come is close contact with as a child.
you're actually thinking of HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) when you mention AIDS becoming untransmittable, but that's still a very good thing! the care available for people with HIV has come incredibly far since AIDS first became known and claimed so many lives, and today it's more than possible for people infected with HIV to live long, healthy lives by taking the proper medication to manage their viral load.
with management, people with HIV will not develop AIDS (which happens when the immune system is sufficiently depleted by HIV) and by consistently taking their medication people with HIV can become undetectable (the viral load in their body is too small to be detected or measured in tests), at which point they are unable to transmit the virus to other people.
HPV (human paillomavirus) comes in many different strains, most of which are absolutely harmless and go away on their own after a couple of months or years of freeloading in your body. I cannot emphasize this enough: HPV is so common that virtually everyone who has sex has, will have, or has had it in their lives, and the vast, VAST majority of those people will never be troubled by it literally at all.
the trouble comes from a few strains of HPV that can cause genital warts, and a few others that can cause cancers in the throat, anus, cervix, vulva, vagina, and penis. while HPV can't be treated, you can reduce your risk of developing cancer by getting the HPV vaccine if you haven't already and, if you have a cervix, getting regular Pap smears to catch early warning signs of cancerous developments.
hepatitis B is a viral infection that targets the liver. in rare cases it can cause chronic health problems that can be very dangerous, but I have to emphasize that's not common. in most adults who get hep B, there will be no symptoms and it will resolve itself in a matter of weeks. the infection is riskiest in children, but at least in America most people have received vaccines against hepatitis B as babies since the 90s.
in conclusion: get your shots, take your medicine, use protection, get tested, and talk to your doctor, but know that if there's one thing humans are good at it's figuring out how to manage STIs. we've been doing it for a long time - most sexually transmitted infections and parasites have been with us since before we we became modern humans - so we're really good at it!
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chryssikyu · 6 months ago
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MC ends up treating Rafayel like a kid. Treats Xavier like a dog.
Zaynes the only one MC treats like an adult and a human.
One day Rafayel has enough, calls MC out on it.
"You treat me like a child, and him like a dog! Why d only treat that doctor like an adult!?"
"Because he's the only one who acts his age and species!"
Surprisingly, Rafayel is the only picking a fight over this. Xavier doesn't care, or rather, he doesn't mind being treated like a puppy. As long as the baby talk is accompanied by head pats and an over abundance of kisses.
Zayne on the other doesn't think about it.
"If it bothers you so much, then I'll just treat you like an adult!"
And she does. Whenever Rafayel would start whining, MC would shut him down without hesitation. When she would normally agree and try to reason with him, she now tells him flat out no, much to Rafayels annoyance.
She stops giving headpats, or even cuddles. And even worse...
MC STOPPED GIVING KISSES!!
Xavier lasted maybe 2 hours before he grew so angry he almost pulled his sword out on Rafayel. It was like you had banned sex, he was irritated in a similar manner.
Even Rafayel began growing irritable, and pressured by Xaviers glare, until he finally rescinded his earlier comment.
"OKAY OKAY IM SORRY!!"
Finally after thoroughly apologizing, Rafayel and Xavier were forgiven for their crimes. (Well for Rafayels crimes. Xavier didn't do aything.)
Rafayel was still upset that Zayne was treated like an adult. So MC decided to try and treat him like a kid.
Starting off strong by hugging him from behind, and kissing his cheeks mercilessly. Going so far as to pat his head and even call him a good boy. And for the most part he doesn't seem to mind. Actually, he hasn't made any sound.
Once MC finally moved away, she noticed how red his ears are. Actually his entire face is.
"Huh? Zayne, could it be you actually like being treated like this?"
"I never said that."
"So you actually hate it?"
"... I never said that either."
He refused to look at anyone, even without looking at his face, you could see from his ears and neck that he was blushing.
"Aw! Zayne~! You're so cute!"
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lunarsilver · 7 days ago
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What are their kinks?
18+, minors do not interact
A tarot reading regarding your (sexual) partner - your current one (asking about their permission would be in good taste), or next one, or the most important one, or your future spouse... Whatever you prefer.
Pictures are from Perfect Blue.
REMEMBER
I’m not a doctor, a psychiatrist, a therapist nor a psychologist. Divination will never replace meetings with them.
It’s a general reading, so not everything will resonate.
If you can’t choose between two piles, probably both of them have some messages for you. You can also not identify with any of them, and that’s okay, too.
Readings can help you make a decision, but they shouldn’t be the main reason for making it.
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1 ~ 2
3 ~ 4
PILE 1
The Hanged Man R - Knight of Wands - Five of Swords - Back of the Deck: Ten of Cups R
What popped in my mind when looking at the Hanged Man in reverse is that your person may like light bondage and/or pleasant to the touch fabrics. Some sensual undergarments, maybe. Moreover, the character on the card in this position brings a person having an orgasm to my mind, with their head thrown back and the general body position, which makes me think your person may like to look at their partner when they climax. I also feel like they may like to be in control; they don’t enjoy “hanging down”, doing nothing, being passive. When it comes to Knight of Wands, the meaning is pretty clear. They love experimenting. They most likely have high libido and treat sex like an adventure. Next, when I looked at Five of Wands, it came to my mind they can be into people crying, like when someone cries a little from overstimulation, for example (the card shows an eye, and it looks like a teardrop runs from it). They may also be into SM or makeup sex, as the card is often about disagreement, conflicts, winning at all costs, or defeat. For some, they may be even into CNC, though this obviously is a pretty specific kink. Lastly, there is a bottle of vodka on the Ten of Cups card (in this position of the card it is turned upside down, as if something was about to be poured from it), so they can like going at it while drunk. The card may suggest your person finds non-traditional relationships appealing. For some, the card is about how this person is into these different things I mentioned but doesn’t really act on it. As a last note, I think that for quite a lot of you, this is ONS or FWB. There’s also a chance your person can be kinda self-centered when it comes to sex. That won’t be the case for everyone, obviously, but I’m writing it down. Overall, this person looks like someone who likes having fun with sex and experimenting, and most likely is rather dominant.
PILE 2
The Devil R - The Empress - Knave of Wands - Back of the Deck: The Magician
So many Major Arcana, as well as many female/feminine-presenting characters. It makes me think that, first, they fantasize about this wonderful, life-changing sex, and second, they either are very into femininity or like to lean into it themselves. I also feel like I have a lot of queer people here, especially sapphics. And if they aren’t a woman, your person still either presents feminine (and they do so out of their own choice, as a form of expression) or they wish they could. Cross-dressing may be a kink of some here, I think. There is at least one guy here (bonus points if cis and straight) who would love to be called a princess or a babygirl lol. I don’t know, I get pretty light, positive, maybe even a little playful vibes from this pile. Like, there are some himbos here, or people who hope for something good, and there’s something pure about the way they see the world. But okay, let’s stay on topic! This person of yours for sure wants to release limiting beliefs and rules, they want to experiment with sex and have fun, the Devil in reverse says it all. The Empress is all about feeling powerful in one’s femininity, and it’s either about them wanting to feel like a princess or queen or about having a partner like this. Your person is a Knave of Wands, looking with a smile into the future, free-spirited and having so many ideas they aren’t sure where to start. The Magician at the back says they manifest all this and are ready to try the whole new world that opens up to them. For most of you, this person isn’t really experienced, or maybe they were always vanilla until recently. Your person here isn’t as dirty as some other piles, they’re most likely still in the phase of finding out what exactly they like, but oh, they’ll have fun with it.
PILE 3
The Fool - The Lovers R - Queen of Pentacles R - Back of the Deck: Nine of Wands
The Fool in this deck is so flamboyant that I instantly thought “Someone’s into twinks” lol. The Fool in the card winks, looks as if he were sending a kiss to the viewer, and dances confidently, proud of his body. The Fool is the card of new beginnings, of having the power of freedom to experience the world. The Lovers in reverse look to me like people hugging and cuddling while lying on the ground, on grass. Actually, all the cards show some place outside (aside from one card, which has a one-color background), and especially with the way The Lovers look here for me, I think your person may like the idea of outdoor sex. Moreover, because the card is reversed, your person may fantasize about having many suitors and having the ability to choose - or to not choose at all. The card also suggests imbalance, so your person can be into sexual power dynamics where one person is stronger than the other - so some BDSM dynamics, or some other role play. Moving on, we have the reversed Queen of Pentacles. The card presents a woman with long, glorious hair in bold but sensual attire. Actually, with the way The Fool and Queen of Pentacles look in this deck, I believe your person may find it hot when someone has revealing clothing or some nice undergarments. I think it’s sexy for them when not everything is visible or visible well, they find it tempting and alluring. With the reversed Queen of Pentacles, I think they are into independent people who know their value. Nine of Wands suggest they want to do it long. They also want something to be left after the experience: either just fatigue, or bite marks, or bruises, or red traces (think slapping someone’s ass, either with a hand or a toy, like a paddle). And now that I think about it, for quite many of you this is about a (sexual) relationship they would like. The reversed Lovers in the center describes the power-dynamic, and The Fool and the reversed Queen of Pentacles show what kind of lovers we talk about. There’s this Queen of Pentacles who has seen some shit, and despite that, or maybe especially because of that, they find something very alluring about the Fool being an enthusiastic, confident novice. The character of Queen of Pentacles actually looks older than The Fool. Your person may like age-gaps, or like to call someone/be called “mommy” (other variants of the name, based on the gender of people involved, are also possible, of course, “mommy” simply is the strongest here). Think about which description you fit more (either in life or just in bed) - The Fool or the reversed Queen of Pentacles. Your person is the other one.
PILE 4
The World - Nine of Swords - Four of Cups - Back of the Deck: King of Wands
The World is pretty straightforward here - they fantasize about this perfect sex, which is an almost spiritual experience; one that brings the feeling of completion, of being happy. For some reason I also think about this kind of sex where you extend the experience, having long, calm pleasure (like a person with vulva sitting on the dick of another person and just squeezing and relaxing their muscles, maybe sometimes moving a few times, just to keep it hard - that’s just an example, of course). Tantric sex. Next, with these Nine of Swords, I think your person likes the idea of someone dreaming about them or not being able to sleep because they think about them (maybe because they’re touching while thinking about your person), they find it hot. Your person may really love the idea of someone finding them so attractive, they get anxious or shy about it. The image also shows handcuffs, so maybe your person is into that. This card in the deck I used for the reading looks happier and more peaceful than its most traditional imagery, and when I look at it, I’m thinking about some romantic gestures like giving flowers. Color-wise, this card and The World both are pink and purple, and have this peaceful vibe about them. It kinda looks like the person portrayed in Nine of Swords dreams about this fantastic sex life, but they’re just lying alone in their bed. On the back we have King of Wands, which represents a passionate lover, and a good one at that. Not just good. Exceptional. For some of you, this is who your person aspires to be, but I think that for more of you, your person fantasizes about someone like this. Your person gives me the vibe of someone who dreams big; they’re into these romantic, maybe a little obsessive scenarios. Of course, it is still just a scenario they like to think about, it doesn’t mean they want to actually be with someone obsessive. Overall, I think that for most of you, this person is more on the submissive side, and they like all these classic scenarios from romance/romantasy/smut books or fics. Another thing for most of you which I see, is that your person probably doesn't have a lot of experience, but they definitely think about sex and romance, and hope for a chance to experience them.
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harmonysanreads · 15 days ago
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Yandere Dr Ratio truly is delicious🤭 there are endless possibilities with him. He is truly underrated 🫠
Hi Lavandula!
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I do get why Yandere Ratio isn't widely explored. Ratio isn't really the ‘typical’ Yandere. He won't respond in the same way towards intense feelings as others due to how developed he is when it comes to himself. Characters who are morally gray and towards that end of the spectrum usually make better Yanderes. Ratio's motivations and overall role can make it difficult to imagine him in that light.
Dr. Ratio, to me, is like the study of Logic personified — even more so than Alhaitham. Logic attempts to advance closer towards ‘truth’ by bringing something inherently abstract (thoughts) in tangible constructs. Something about that reminds me a lot about Ratio's mission. You'd think that the man would be extremely pessimistic about the future based on how he speaks, but surprise surprise, he's the exact opposite. Almost as if he experienced it all first-hand.
There is a fun overlap I noticed while studying him (alongside Sunday and Aventurine), although I'm not sure if this is just a coincidence. If you think back to all the questions Sunday proposes about humanity and then rewatch the exchange Ratio has with Screwllum at the end of Crown of the Mundane and Divine — you'll notice that the answers have been there all along.
The words themselves don't matter much, it's the manner, the casual certainty in his tone that gives them meaning. In many cases, Ratio is that man who's already passed many of the struggles of life and is attempting to help others in his very Dr. Ratio way. I sometimes joke that the more issues a character has, the better Yandere they make. If we just take that seriously for a second, compare it to Ratio's significant lack of issues (at present) in comparison to some other characters, I think it makes sense why he's a bit complicated.
One of the perks of Yandere Ratio in my opinion is that, he can work well with almost any kind of darling. Perhaps you're intellectually driven like him, maybe your world views are drastically different from his. Maybe you carry yourself in a certain way, respond to the world around you in a manner that piques his interest. The problem-solving instincts kick in whenever he's observing you.
Or maybe you're quite dumb, constantly walk straight into problems that could've easily been avoided had you just thought twice. Ratio can't stand idiocy, you see. He must treat this malady himself before the worst case scenario comes true.
He's a victim of cuteness aggression when it comes to you, more than you'd think and I will not be taking criticisms here. It's not difficult to break down emotions to their atomic structures in order to avoid processing them, but you make even that a task. He acts so dignified and self-assured all the time, but the moment you commit the greatest offence in his presence (read : being nice to him) — he's going to be thinking about it all month.
The rush of feelings is unfamiliar at best, counterproductive at worst. The thoughts he eventually starts to have are concerning. Distancing himself from you doesn't work, his weird behavior may temporarily make you avoid him. But, he doesn't like that either and oh goodness, the insecurities that surge forward when you're being happy in others' company.
Ignorance may be the disease that plagues most of the universe, but there is something far vicious, obstinate and perplexing that has grasped the great doctor. And he isn't quite certain if he wants to cure himself of it.
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i-cant-sing · 1 year ago
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Just thinking about Yandere Todoroki clan and reader's random moments.
Reader coming home after a particularly bad day, but poor girl cant even cry or complain without everyone immediately overreacting and pulling you out of school/college or even keeping you from going out at all. So now, reader has to either cry in self pity before she enters her home, wipe her tears and fix herself just enough to show that she hadnt just bawled her eyes out moments ago. That, or do the more risky thing and go home, go to your room and cry under the covers, but then theres always the chance of Rei or the others walking in on you any moment.
Also thinking about baby/toddler reader being sick, just a common cold or flu, nothing major. But with reader whining and being so young, the family's infantalisation goes through the roof and theyd treat you as if you were immunocompromised. I wont lie, but I think Rei is almost kinda... glad when you get sick? She enjoys you being dependant on her for the most things, even when you grow up and are able to handle a cold, she still deludes herself into thinking that you need mommy to come and help you.
I think the one person who is most affected by reader getting sick, no matter what age, is Enji. The man just cant help but view you as a fragile, starving Victorian child the moment you fall ill. In his eyes, even a harsh blow of air is too much for a fragile thing like you, let alone something as bad as the flu. He just- he's holding toddler reader in his arms, who snuggles into his warm body, your tiny nose pink and he cant get the image of you crying and vomiting and being oh so feverish- thats just way too much for your small body. Oh how he almost cried when he took you to the doctor for a shot and you clung to him, trying to bury yourself into him as you begged him to make you feel better, cried to him that you didnt want to get the "big scary needle!" He just had to hold you there in his firm grip as you writhed, had to look away when you looked at him and he saw the feeling of betrayal in your eyes, had to keep himself from not strangling the fucking doctor for not being careful, had to walk out of the clinic and hand you to Rei because he couldnt hear you cry anymore, had to have Rei console both you and Enji (assuring him that "no, Enji. Y/n doesnt resent you for making her get a shot.") and he couldnt even sleep a wink that night because he was standing by your bed, holding your tiny hand with his pinky as a tear finally slipped out of his eye.
ALSO thinking about adult reader going out of the house to meet up with friends, except shes meeting up with them at a club instead of at their house like she told Enji and Rei, and now shes standing outside, abandoned by said friends, and shes now running because a group of pervy men are chasing her and she doesnt know who to call, so she just speed dials Shotou, except someone just changed all your speed dials to one number, and you think youre doomed when Shotou doesnt say a word to you and just hangs up when within minutes, someone comes in front of you-
"Dabi?" He tells you to cover your ears and look away, and you know well by know what that means, so you obey, feeling a bit regretful as those men begin to scream in agony. You dont know how long its been until Dabi pulls your hands away and examines your wounds. He lets you crash into his chest as you sob, and this time, Dabi simply decides to take you home quietly without a lecture.
Hmmm, also thinking about Natsuo who is usually cool as a cucumber, the most normal being in the family, except for his very rare episodes of unbridled rage where he suddenly becomes the Hulk. Good thing for you is that this anger is never directed towards you, rather towards people who actively threaten your life (except Rei cause she gets to play "Im your mom who became mentally unstable because of your abusive dad") The only time NAtsuo is stern with you is when it comes to your health. He's just looking at you with those strict eyes when you refuse to take your multivitamins, or dont want to get a flu shot, or try to make up an excuse so that he cant check your vitals. And when he just grabs your wrist and pulls you to sit down so that he can do his checkup, its in those moments that you realise just how strong your brother is... and how easy it may be for him to overpower you and sedate you if he ever followed through Rei's threats.
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justwinginglife · 4 months ago
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Just What The Doctor Ordered (A Soshiro Hoshina One Shot)
Y'all know the drill- it's NSFW time.
It's late afternoon and you're typing away at your computer, inputting your latest medical report. You document everything about your last patient, what findings you saw, how you treated the condition, your follow-up instructions for future treatment, the usual.
You're a doctor on base at the Third Division and though usually you see patients either one at a time for their annual check-up's or all at once after a massive battle, at this point in time you have an unusually large gap in your schedule and you plan to make the most of it. You enjoy the peace and quiet because you know that working here, anything could happen at any time and you could be called in the middle of the night if a Kaiju so happened to strike.
You finish your report and lean back in your chair, taking a bite out of an apple you'd rested on top of your desk. You never know when you'll be needed so you make sure to snack when you can to keep your energy up. You stare at the fruit in your hand and laugh to yourself, "Guess an apple a day doesn't scare the doctor away after all." You shrug and start organizing your medical supply cart when suddenly you hear the clinic door open.
You look up to see your favorite patient smirking at you, leaning against the door frame as he clutches his wounded arm. "Soshiro." You say, shaking your head at him, "Didn't I tell you to stop getting hurt?"
He chuckles and pulls himself off of the door frame, sauntering towards you, blood dripping down his skin. "You know I'd do anything to see my favorite doctor."
You knew that was true as you had slowly started noticing he'd become a frequent flyer at the medical clinic, some injuries large, some injuries small. He'd even come in for a papercut once, the cheeky bastard. And he'd always wait for you. There were other doctors and nurses available but even if he was on the verge of death he wouldn't let anyone touch him but you.
You pick up some bandages and something to disinfect his arm. You grab his arm forcefully, leaning in to examine it, to which he grins. "Love it when you man handle me."
You roll your eyes and start cleaning the wound, though the corner of your lips twitch into the beginnings of a smile. He watches as you carefully bandage the cut up. "There- good as new." You say to him, expecting him to flash you that smirk again, maybe press a kiss to your hand, and say "Until next time, doc" as he saunters off down the hallway. But he doesn't do that this time. His eyes remain on you, lips curling into a sly smile.
You raise an eyebrow at him. "Yes, Soshiro? What is it?"
He licks his lips, and leans back on the medical table, propping himself up by his hands resting behind him. His legs spread slightly, revealing a growing bulge in his pants. "Oh you know. I thought we could squeeze in some time for my physical."
You smirk. "Oh really now? And I suppose you'll want me to be extra thorough?"
He winks at you. "Oh baby, I want you to examine every inch of me."
You laugh, amused by his bold attitude today, but the laugh trails off as you realize he's slipped his raging boner out of his pants and wrapped his muscled hand around it.
"And I know exactly which inches you can start with." He whispers, leaning in towards you, his eyes daring yours not to look away as he strokes himself.
Something changes in you. You exhale loudly, the breath a little shaky, as you bite down on your lower lip hard. "Fuck." The sight of him edging himself on, rubbing that thumb of his across his own wet tip, causes a warm sensation to pool in your underwear. You desperately want to know what he tastes like.
He gives you a cocky grin as you get on your knees in front of him but you can tell his heart must be racing as fast as yours because he starts to flush a little at the sight of you positioned like this. In an instant, you close the distance and take his throbbing cock in your mouth. He groans and grips the edge of the medical table tight with one hand, pushing your head in deeper with the other hand. You choke a little and he thinks he might just cum now at the sight of your flushed face, saliva dripping from your mouth as you struggle to take all of his length in. He releases his hand from the back of your head and uses a finger to collect the saliva from your chin, bringing it up to his mouth to taste. He moans into his finger as you suck harder.
You love the taste of him, the way his precum slicks against your tongue, the way his dick gets acquainted with the back of your throat. Still gagging on him hard, you slide your knees apart slightly and slide a hand down in between your legs, slipping your soaked underwear down just slightly so you can finger your dripping pussy. His eyes widen at the sight and he grips the medical table harder, panting "Fucking hell."
For a moment, he just watches as you slide him in and out of your mouth while you touch yourself, his dick hardening itself further against the walls of your throat. Then he can't take it anymore. He balls up your hair in a fist and pulls you off his dripping cock. "That's enough now." He growls. He yanks you to your feet and your panties slip the rest of the way down your legs, crumpling on the floor. Then he gets on his knees and presses hungry kisses to your stomach and your hips before taking the rim of your skirt in his teeth and dragging it down your legs. He licks his lips as he eyes your cunt, bursting at the seams for him. He shoves two fingers deep into his mouth, thoroughly coating them, before he quickly shoves them into you. You yelp as you feel him enter you, his movements desperate and hungry. He savors the feeling of you clenching around him, slicking his fingers with your lust for him, as he pumps them in and out of you, curling his fingers slightly to hit just the right spot. He licks and sucks at your clit as he continues to finger you at a hard but steady pace.
"S-Soshiro." You moan. He pulls his head away from your clit, wanting to see what you look like moaning his name. He groans, not quite expecting the fire it lit in him. You're grasping your breast in one hand, thumb circling your nipple, and your head is thrown back in pleasure. He yanks his fingers out of you quickly, licking them clean as he stands up to face you. He wants that fucking neck of yours, it's like it was made for him the way it's arching like that. He wraps his hand around your throat and pulls you to him, gripping your hip hard with his other hand.
"God, when you fucking say my name." He snarls. Without another word, he's sucking and biting at your neck. The movements wet and messy as though he couldn't care less how he takes you in as long as he gets to devour you. He grinds up against your hips, his cock banging in between your legs as he marks up the length of your neck. He decides he wants to claim your mouth now so after a couple of nips at your jaw he dives into you with his tongue. The kisses are passionate and hungry. His tongue is needy, as though it's been set ablaze and the only thing that can save him is your tongue. He bites down on your lower lip, pulling it back a little with his teeth before releasing. "So fucking perfect." He murmurs as he begins to rub his thumb over the spot where he bit down on your bottom lip.
Then he decides he's had a better idea. He suddenly turns you around and bends you over the medical table. He admires the curve of your ass for a moment, giving it a squeeze, before he plunges his impatient cock into your pussy. You breathing gets heavy and the harsh sounds escaping your pretty lips drives him wild, causing him to thrust into you faster and harder. He digs his fingers into your hip and wraps his other hand around your marked up throat. It's just enough pressure to know he's there, but the sensation sends another moan tumbling out of your lips as more of your pussy dribbles onto his cock.
He smirks as he feels how wet you are. "Such a good fucking girl for me." He growls as he continues pumping into you vigorously.
You whimper and grab at your breast again, riding out the feeling. Then you feel it, a warmth that's started to burn in your core. "Ah fuck Soshiro!" You swear, the words coming out louder than you expected. You clap a hand over your mouth and he smirks again. He yanks the hand from your mouth and pins it roughly behind your back.
"None of that now, darling. I want to hear every filthy little thing that comes out of that pretty mouth of yours."
You groan hearing that and it earns you another sharp thrust. "Soshiro you better not fucking stop, I'm so fucking close goddamnit."
He chuckles darkly. "I wouldn't dream of it. Now be a good girl and soak my cock with your cum, yeah baby?"
You nod emphatically, "Yes baby, fuck yes baby." Your moans get louder as you start to convulse, your walls shuddering around his erection as your orgasm floods out of you. The feeling of the warm liquid dripping down his aching cock as he fucks you harder is enough to send him over the edge as well. With a couple more thrusts, he's soaked you in his cum. He collapses on top of your back, pressing a kiss to your shoulder as he groans, riding out the wave of ecstasy.
You pull away from each other finally, leaning on opposite ends of the medical table trying to catch your breath.
Then he smirks at you as he pulls his clothes back on. "Same time tomorrow, doc?"
You roll your eyes and move to grab a towel to clean yourself up.
He's hit with a sudden wave of possessiveness as he realizes you're trying to wipe away the mess he's made in and on you. He knows you need to get cleaned up but somehow he was hoping to see you drenched in him a little longer. He snatches your wrist suddenly, causing you to drop the towel.
"No one's cleaning you up but me." He pushes you down so that your back hits the medical table. Then he starts to lick his cum off of your inner thighs first. His eyes flit upwards to your soaked mound and an involuntary growl rumbles up his throat.
"Yeah forget about tomorrow. We're going for round two now."
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ashdreams2023 · 4 months ago
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Could I request Loki taking care of injured reader? Either happened on a mission or by some weird occurrence?
Loki taking care of injured reader
First off how dare you put yourself in danger like that?! And you dare to come injured as well
He’s frantically looking for any parts of you he can fix but soon realizes that you’re human and his magic can do so much
So there you were bandaged up and asked to take as much time to heal as possible
Loki won’t let you out if his sight, not even to the bathroom which proved to be an awkward affair with him waiting outside the door until you finished
"Do you need toilet paper?" "I’m good go away!"
Always makes sure your bandages are clean and changes them for you regularly
Feeds you lots of herbs because he knows they have some benefits to help the healing process
If he’s bored enough he’ll draw on your cast and by god it’s the most beautiful thing ever
Reads for you when you cuddle and tells you about the stories of him breaking his bones during wars and still coming back later like it’s nothing
"I may not be as irrational as my brother but trust I will take care of you better than any of those healers you call doctors here"
Would blast anyone who interrupts your sleeping and doesn’t matter if it’s a team member! (Except Natasha he doesn’t have a death wish)
When the casts are removed he almost throws the machine that cuts the cast out the window because he thought the doctor is gonna amputate your arm
"Loki no!" "I knew it! I can’t trust those barbaric people to treat you!" "That’s not-"
He’s forced to wait outside the office for the second round of cutting your cast and when you were finish he hugged you so tightly you thought you’ll break again
"Never worry me like that again!" "Ok ok!"
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lanawinterscigarettes · 2 months ago
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hiii i just found your blog, I LOVE HOW YOU WRITE, and if i can request like an angsty story about house and wilson with reader, and the reader has like some disease that'll kill her😭😭😭😭😭im just craving angst
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YOU ARE SO SWEET THANK YOU 💞💞 it's been awhile since I've written a good angst fic so this is perfect for me
Your Last Breath (Greg House x gn reader x James Wilson)
Warnings: talk of hospitals/medical procedures, reader has a mystery illness that kills them, they/them pronouns used a few times to refer to the reader in a gender neutral way, hurt/no comfort, heavy angst, main character death (spoiler: it's you)
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The doctors had been trying for months to figure out what was wrong with you. Months of invasive tests, months of going back and forth with possible explanations, months of being put on temporary treatments that seemed to work for a short while before you eventually succumbed to whatever was causing your problems again.
Everyone was stumped, and by everyone I truly do mean everyone. Not even House could figure out what was wrong, something that frustrated him to no end for multiple reasons. And by the time he was finally able to figure out what the cause was, it was already too late.
The disease had progressed too far along on its course for the doctors to be able to treat it properly. The best they could do was make you comfortable for the few weeks you had left to live.
Usually he liked having cases he couldn't crack, he liked figuring out the puzzle of what was bothering his patient, he liked being able to go to Cuddy and say "I told you so" when it ended up him being right and everyone else was wrong. But not this time.
This time all he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and die. If only. He'd gladly give up both of his legs if it meant you'd get better.
Meanwhile, the resident head of oncology wasn't taking the news very well, either. It was normal for House to shut himself away for extended periods of time, but not Wilson. He barely left his office anymore, not to check on his own patients, not to accept a request for a consult, nothing. In fact, the only time he ever did leave was to visit you.
Most nights were spent with either him or House at your side, checking your vitals and fetching whatever it was that you needed. You ended up having to beg the both of them to go home at some point, even if it was to just shower and change, but they still refused, choosing to stay at the hospital instead.
Occasionally one of the ducklings would stop by if either of them couldn't for some reason, whether that be due to another patient needing attention or because you finally convinced them to take a break for once.
Foreman was solemn, talking about arrangements that could possibly be made for your body after death if you hadn't decided already. Cameron was sympathetic, reassuring you that they'd make sure you wouldn't be in any pain during your last days on earth. Chase was playful, trying to take your mind off things by cracking a joke or two. And Cuddy was surprisingly very nurturing when she managed to make the time to check in on you.
The whole thing was very bittersweet. While you appreciated everyone caring so much about you, it hurt to know why they were doing it.
Your final day was surprisingly quiet, with no nurses stopping by to check on you every hour or so like they had been for the past couple of weeks where you'd been bedridden almost completely. You suspected someone had requested for that, so you could have a bit of peace in the last few hours you'd be alive for.
House stood at the foot of your bed, watching as you slept. He looked like he was about to say something when Wilson suddenly spoke up from the armchair beside your bed.
"Don't even think about it, House. You're not waking them up right now."
Despite Wilson's firm tone, House couldn't help but roll his eyes. "Oh, come on. It's not like it matters much, they're going to be dead soon anyway."
It took everything in the oncologist not to snap and strangle the man in front of him. The only thing that managed to stop him was the sound of you letting out a hacking cough as you woke up. Even with the oxygen machine, it had become increasingly more difficult for you to breathe.
"Guys, don't fight," you tried to make your tone stern as you lectured them, but your throat was dry and therefore made your voice weak and raspy when you spoke.
"Hey, hey, don't speak, it's alright," Wilson gently reassured you as he reached out to take one of your hands into his. Your skin felt clammy, but he didn't care.
House had a pained look in his eyes as he watched you, but he did his best to cover it up with his usual snark. "We were just talking about you. Trying to figure out who should get your stuff when you die."
Wilson gave him an evil look, but you simply laughed. At least, they thought you laughed. It was kind of hard to tell given how sick you were.
"You guys are funny."
If it were any other time, House would've beamed with pride and joy at being able to make you smile with one of his quips, but this time he just felt empty inside, knowing that it was possibly the last one you'd ever hear. He quietly observed as Wilson helped you drink some water out of a small paper cup, one hand helping you hold it up to your lips while the other rested on your shoulder.
"Thank you," was the only thing you managed to get out once you were done, your breathing stalling yet again when you tried to speak. The three of you knew it was getting close to when it was going to happen. The problem was that only one of you had accepted it, and it wasn't either one of the two doctors who were in the room.
"I love you guys," ended up being your final words, a bittersweet smile on your face and tears in your eyes as you took your last breath. You hoped they knew that you meant that. You hoped they knew that you didn't blame them.
And you hoped that your death helped to bring them closer together rather than tearing them apart. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but who really cared? It's not like you'd be around to witness it anyway.
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End notes: I rarely ever finish a request this early so please don't expect this to become a normal thing 😭 I just got really into writing this for some reason and once I started I just couldn't stop
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anarchomitsumi · 5 months ago
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okay so stl 61 !! this chapter has laid out ujie's worldview: there are those in this world that are liked, accepted, popular, —and those that will always be shunned. only a limited amount of people may be the lucky ones.
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and turns out, shima's worldview isn't so different. for him there are those who take, and those whose things are taken away from.
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either you are born a shunned monster or the doctor that created it. no nuance is accepted. it's essentially a reaction to being socially shunned, you end up resenting the people you deem guilty of your misfortune so much that you deny them their own depth of being. they are the fortunate, they could never understand your suffering. it's a feeling quite common among teenagers, i think.
if i were to point out something, it'd be that for ujie this classification into fortunate-unfortunate is unmovable. he has no hope of changing his social fate. for shima, however, it isn't set in stone. he's determined to get out of it and get back the things he's been robbed of.
ujie just seems...very bitter about the way he's been treated. when both mitsumi and his unnamed classmate say 'you shouldn't criticize someone who's giving it their all', his eyes just seem to say yeah, but who's gonna empathize with me? no one gives me grace when I'm giving it my all.
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he's essentially jealous of the good treatment he thinks shima is getting from their peers. to him, shima's fortune is the cause of his own misfortune.
but along the way he's denied shima any humanity, shima cannot have any depth or trouble in his eyes. i think this is especially easy to see in the ending pannel, after shima confronts him, when he says so that guy is human too — implying he thought before that shima wasn't human because he couldn't understand struggle.
it's a type of ideology that, though an understandable defense mechanism, is very unfair to the people around you.
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what specially gets me though, is that ujie tells shima he's ARROGANT for taking the monster role. this is shima, we know he has been behaving against his wishes to please others since he was little. we know he performs to be liked, but despises the attention he gets because they like him for his appearance, his performance, never truly him. when ujie calls him "arrogant", he's implying shima enjoys the empty attention he gets from his peers. and to be told that you enjoy the very thing we know troubles shima the most...i can understand why he got mad.
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here's the thing though — ujie understands that the attention shima gets has nothing to do with what he actually does or with who he truly is. he understands it's an empty sort of acceptance, but regardless to ujie it still looks more desirable than his own situation. it might be impersonal but that also means it's unconditional. shima will always be liked because he's attractive.
(to shima though, it's not unconditional at all. he thinks the moment he starts acting truly like himself everybody will despise him)
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so yeah. closing thoughts. i think this was truly a beneficial encounter for the both of them. for shima, it helped him get out of his self pity spiral for a bit and acknowledge ujie's point of view. and also he was assertive for a change ! shima exhibiting an emotion that isn't a fake smile or resignated indifference?? what?? i can't believe he actually....got things out of his chest for a change.
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and for ujie, i think this has broadened his worldview. he understands know that people as seemingly perfect as shima can indeed struggle as well. the world isn't cleanly divided into Blessed By God and Doomed Forever.
i also hope this helps him get rid of those awful thoughts that he'll never be accepted. if shima is an anomaly, —like he found out today — maybe he can be too. if that little smile in the last pannel is anything to go by, his bitterness might just start to crack :)
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possamble · 5 months ago
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Like take for example how she treats healing Laios leg!! We *never* see someone who was healed have lasting symptoms from a heal. It *itches* terribly — Laios looks like he will scratch it raw. The itching implies an incomplete heal — you only itch that bad when something is being regrown or scabbing like when you get tattoos. There’s something that needs to finish healing. This scene always stood out to me— because Falin notices and *heals* it. And that brought up a ton of questions for me (We see her cast magic, was it to soothe the itching? A phantom pain? Why was it itching in the first place? Didn’t Marcille finish the job? Why was he having after effects we never see someone have any before?) and i’m breaking my brain over it because is this an sign of Marcille’s engagement with healing in general? Perfunctory—a means to an end? Morals? I feel like there is something there for us because that scene wasn’t necessary to the plot so why did Ryoko Kui add this interaction? I think how Marcille engages with healing was telling us a lot more than I previously realized because she was in a medical researcher position before coming into the dungeon however when we see how this was practically applied by her was really interesting!! She’s so divorced from feeling empathy for the pain of healing and i think that’s some sort of self-preservation instinct. Idk i just feel like her engagement with healing is so fucking fascinating when juxtaposed with her beliefs on death pls share thots if any
I think what gets hidden in the details about Marcille’s healing is that no, she’s not a talented cleric and healer in the way that Falin is. But Fantasy settings tend to relegate healing towards “holy” and “good” magic that never causes harm—
and Marcille is what you’d get if you put a doctor and a surgeon with a modern, more realistic approach towards medicine in a genre that doesn’t usually allow for that. 
Like, you’ll see surgeons or doctors secretly being incredibly efficient serial killers in TV thrillers everywhere—but a fantasy series with a cleric or healer that’s secretly great at killing is a bit more rare to find(though not nonexistent, admittedly). Healing magic tends to be painted as either a religious discipline that’s not accessible to those who don’t have a tie to a deity or some ineffable force in the universe, or a matter of accessing some natural “life force” that exists in all living beings. 
Dungeon Meshi, of course, loves bending fantasy conventions in the most incredible ways, so that’s not how it works here. The series allows itself to contend with the fact that healing a human body requires extensive and painstakingly detailed knowledge of that body.
The reason that Falin might appear to be a much more talented healer than Marcille is because Kui dresses her up in all the archetypal traits of a Caring Cleric, and that immediately clicks with readers expecting fantasy conventions in ways that Marcille's expertise doesn't.
This isn’t to discredit Falin, obviously. She is a talented healer, as attested to by Marcille herself:
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But the interesting thing is that she does it all on instinct, so it’s not an exact knowledge. Furthermore, she uses the gnomish system of healing, which is implied to rely more on the judgment and knowledge of natural spirits (and therefore takes less mana). So it’s not hard to imagine that she would have less exact knowledge of how the human body operates than Marcille does as a medical researcher. 
And that in and of itself raises questions: In a world where magic can immediately re-attach a limb, why would medical research be necessary? But Dungeon Meshi makes it clear that healing magic isn’t perfect, nor “holy” magic—it’s simply magic, like any other, carefully tailored to operate within the confines of what a human body needs in order to keep living. It’s not able to cure everything, and it especially seems to have gaps in terms of being able to treat illnesses that aren’t immediately solvable injuries.
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And that all ties into Marcille's attitude towards it: It's a scientific and magical discipline like any other that requires careful study. There's nothing inherently good or bad about it—it was made by people, for people, and what matters is how you use it.
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So, Marcille was at the academy, studying the ways that illness happens in a body, and carefully writing new magic to counteract or at least mitigate it.
(How I interpreted this was that she was likely part of research teams dealing with complicated things like autoimmune diseases, cancer, and other things where the body isn’t technically injured by a foreign element, but erroneously harming itself due to internal reasons.)
For me, this kind of explains her approach to pain in healing:
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Honestly, what this immediately reminded me of was that a friend of mine had to have surgery on their throat when they were younger, and part of the procedure was waking them up without anaesthesia right after the surgery to make sure that they could still feel everything. They told me it was the worst pain they’d ever felt in their entire life—but from a medical perspective, it was necessary to make sure that none of the critical nerves in the neck had been affected. 
Sometimes in medicine, pain is necessary because it’s not some uncomplicated and bad thing—it’s a response of your nervous system, and sometimes the only indicator that your body is still working the way it should. And I think this is the mindset that Marcille has, which is why she seems so blase about it—she doesn’t think that she’s actually hurting people, it’s just a necessary part of the healing process. 
And in some ways, she just sees it as a realistic downside of the fact that you have to recover quickly in dungeon situations:
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Normal recovery would take months. Healing magic shortens that to a few seconds. The pain is a result/tradeoff of forcing something that would naturally take a long time into such a short timespan. This all makes sense and is Right and Correct and Normal in Marcille's mind. It's not that she lacks empathy and doesn't care enough about not harming her patients: she doesn't think that it's "harm" at all.
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Not a shred of guilt in that face before causing extreme pain. Contrast this to her constant fussing over Izutsumi on the smallest things—it's hard to believe she wouldn't even be a little apologetic if she actually believed this would be hurtful in a way that matters.
I think this is overall, less indicative of any lack of empathy so much as her incredibly stubborn and sometimes ridiculous way of compartmentalizing things to her own internal rules. I’d even argue that this mindset is preferable in surface situations, where people have the luxury of time. Dungeon healing hurts because it has to be fast and instantaneous—but if you're just treating a broken bone that can be put in a cast with slower healing magic to help, wouldn't you prefer that over an instant heal with the chance to cause brain damage, no matter how minuscule the chance is? Shouldn’t your long-term health matter more than short-term recovery and some pain?
To touch on Laios’s leg injury—we actually do see this kind of reaction to healing magic later on in the manga. When Marcille is teaching Laios how to heal, she ends up bowling him over because her cut gets super itchy:
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but then she reacts positively and tells him that it's supposed to happen, before trusting him enough to try it on Senshi.
So while yes, it was an “incomplete” heal, I don’t think it was particularly telling about her approach to healing. And honestly, judging by the fact that it only distracted him when he was relaxed enough to be cleaning his armour before bed, it looks like she connected all the major muscles and nerves enough not to cause pain or risk re-injury by moving, but just left superficial stuff for Laios’s body to naturally heal. 
Her mindset makes sense in context: She also had to heal Chilchuck and Senshi, while conserving enough energy to immediately start digging for Falin’s body and potentially do a very taxing resurrection spell as soon as possible. 
After that, Falin healed the rest of Laios’s leg injury in a situation where it wasn’t needed, but there were no other high stakes to discourage it. Also, she can’t bear to see others in pain. ambrosiagourmet already did an incredible analysis of how this empathy doesn't really signify perfect altruism so much as Falin's deep discomfort with having to witness pain, so I won't go into that too much—but the important part is, Falin isn't inherently a more caring healer than Marcille. They are both making decisions for the patient based on their own approaches to healing—it's just that Falin's approach is preferable for dungeoneering overall.
(In Marcille's defense, it seems that dungeons are an incredibly specific environment that falls way outside the realm of what's actually taught to mages in most schools. Being a combat-oriented mage actually seems pretty frowned upon.)
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So, in a lot of ways, Marcille is both realistic about dungeon healing (mana conservation by not doing full heals when not necessary, thinking about pain as the condensation of the time it would have taken to naturally heal, etc.) and very unrealistic about it. What she doesn’t realize is that the pain matters: In a dungeon, people have to be up and ready to continue right away, over and over. If it hurts every time, that makes them very averse to being healed, stressed out about getting injured, and affects their performance as dungeoneers.
All that to say… I personally believe that Marcille is very passionate about healing people. Not healing magic necessarily, but medicine as a whole. It’s not just a means to an end—it’s her main area of study only second to her research into ancient magic. And sure, she might have gotten into it because of her fear of death—but what I think people don’t give enough credit to is that her motivations changed from when she was a child. 
You see it here, when she’s laying her dream outright to the Winged Lion: 
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She might be kinda racist herself, hypocritical, and short-sighted (mostly out of ignorance, I’d argue), but at heart, she hates that people hurt each other. She hates that long-lived races look down on everyone else just because of lifespan. She has—arguably very correctly—identified the disparity in lifespans as one of the main causes of interracial strife, and she wants to get rid of it so that everyone can fully understand and relate to each other as equals. 
And in some ways, it’s not even that insane of a dream. 
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Knowing that people used to live as long as she’ll have to, and something changed in the eons since, is it really that weird for her to want to change it back somehow? 
But all that aside—the most important part of this to me is that… originally, she wasn’t actually that hung up on completely equalizing lifespans. She got into medicine because she wanted to, at the very least, close the gap as much as she could in her very long life. 
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She was realistic about it at first. She thought that, by studying ancient magic’s ability to pull from the infinite, she could harness that infinite energy in tandem with medical knowledge to give more life to the short-lived races. 
But as she says it herself, it changed when she realized that she doesn’t have time to gradually unravel it on her own. 
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So, yes. She got desperate. She got crazy. In light of all she did as dungeon lord, it’s easy to assume that she never cared much about healing as a profession, and is just a self-obsessed little girl caged by her trauma and trying to change the entire world to make sure she doesn’t have to be hurt. 
And… she is all that. She's my blorbo supreme but I'll be the first to insist that she is very much a complete hot mess. But my point is that these were very extreme circumstances, and Ryoko Kui has given us all the understated evidence we need to know that she’s actually a very passionate doctor otherwise. This is the girl who freaks out if she’s not useful to other people and not allowed to help:
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Did actually get excited about making safe dungeons for helpful purposes beyond just learning more about ancient magic to fulfill her dream: 
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And in tandem with her own personal trauma—not in opposition to it or to obscure it—cared about making life more peaceful and equal for everyone in the world. Not to mention, she had to have done some insane work to be acknowledged as the most talented researcher at the academy and be allowed onto teams that were researching new healing magics.
TL:DR, I think she has a lot of empathy for people and passion for helping them, it’s just expressed in a way you wouldn’t expect in a fantasy because Ryoko Kui doesn’t fuck around with her storytelling and genre subversion. She might not be a good archetypal healer, but she's an extremely knowledgeable doctor with a point-blank and intense attitude towards healing and medical treatment (see: her strictness about physical touch when teaching Laios about healing).
For me, all evidence points towards her going back to what she was doing before the story on top of her duties as Court Mage, kind of becoming a sort of Surgeon General for Melini as the head of health and safety for the country and whatnot. 
PS. I will admit that there's explicit evidence she's not good at healing here:
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But this was also like... chapter 3. Written years ago. I personally feel that everything Kui has said about Marcille's background since is enough evidence that it was just a one-off joke before she had an airtight idea about who Marcille was and would be, but I'll concede that it's mostly conjecture.
But again, as I said, I believe that while she might not be the best at the heal spell that's used in Dungeons, she's passionate about being a medical researcher and the field of medicine as a whole.
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