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jihyocentric · 2 months ago

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“so you want to make her jealous?”

jihyo hums at the question, with her eyes closed, breathing slow and deep. she had been attentively listening to a song playing idly in jeongyeon’s room, a haze in her mind caused by the amount of times jeongyeon had her head between her thighs.

it would take jihyo a lot more than getting dressed (with a shirt much bigger than her, coated in jeongyeon’s scent) and the minutes waiting for jeongyeon to return to the bed for jihyo to stop feeling jeongyeon’s hands — everywhere on her body, from her neck to her ankles.

while waiting, jihyo has to shut her legs tightly to avoid thinking about the way jeongyeon had handled her, apparently into new positions, certainly rougher she used to be. jihyo had been deprived from physical touch, deplorably so, but she knew better than to make jeongyeon return to the warmth between her legs, both sore and entirely too tired for more.

“not jealous,” jihyo says like a whisper, her voice faltering, throat dry after the amount of careless, loud cries jeongyeon inflicted on her. “i want to make her regret.”

sitting is almost uncomfortable, despite the softness of the mattress, and jihyo dismisses the ache, satisfied with it, blessedly sore.

jeongyeon hands her a bowl with instant ramen, all she could do that late at dawn, and leaves a cup of water on the nightstand for jihyo, taking a seat beside her. she looked no better than jihyo, with fresh scratches on her arms, bottom lip red and puffed from the amount of times jihyo had sunk her teeth on it — but surely more composed.

“a bit sudden,” jeongyeon grabs her fork, tummy aching from a hunger she could hardly notice moments back, now more evident as her focus was no longer on her friend. “you both made a cute couple. i thought sana was decent.”

“decent?” jihyo laughs shortly, her voice low, barely audible. “how come you’re only saying that after eating out her ex for…” jihyo glances at the clock jeongyeon kept on her nightstand. 3 a.m. “four hours. wow. is this a new record?”

“as if i wouldn’t do that even if she was decent.” jeongyeon chuckles, crossing her legs, elbows aligned with her knees as she held her own bowl of ramen. “’sides i have the right to. met you first and all.”

jihyo laughs, “and almost dated me.”

“and almost dated you.” jeongyeon nods, playfully agreeing with her. “i’m glad she was the one for you back then. i could’ve ended up in her place.”

jihyo grabs the cup of water jeongyeon had promptly left for her, chugging half of it in one go. it still wasn’t enough for her throat to hurt less, temporarily damaged from all the moaning she did and jeongyeon squeezing her neck, but she would have to deal with it if she wanted to eat.

“you wouldn’t.” jihyo says, reminiscing a time no longer than two years ago when jeongyeon was more than a casual acquaintance, but the one she called weekly to have sex with. an acquaintance with benefits, if anything. “you’re honest. never lied to me, even when you didn’t owe me anything. sana cheated, after two years in our relationship.”

“yeah, i don’t do that,” jeongyeon mixes the noodles with her fork. “if this isn’t asking too much… what did she say when you found out?”

“she was surprised. she said it was a mistake, that she did it only once, told me she wouldn’t give up on me,” jihyo sighs, forgetting about her hunger for a brief moment. “but the other girl was nayeon.”

jeongyeon squeezes jihyo’s knee tenderly. “sorry i asked.” which jihyo replies with a small ‘it’s okay now’. “now that’s fucked up.”

“tell me about it.” jihyo lets out a meek laugh. “i’m no longer angry at nayeon. if she did that to me, then she was never my best friend in the first place. i’m fine with cutting her off and forgetting she was ever in my life. but sana… sana thinks i’m going back to her. i know she does- she talked about it to her friends. one of them was kind enough to tell me she sees me as a prize. told me to keep my decision of breaking up with her.”

“damn.” jeongyeon breathes out. “there’s another way i could fix this for you, y’know. she looks like she can’t handle more than two punches.”

jihyo considers jeongyeon’s offer, knowing she was joking, but there was some truth behind her words. “i want her to see me happy with somebody else. it’s all i’ve been thinking about. sana is in love with me- even if she says these things to her friends, she likes me…” jihyo affirms with sheer conviction, her eyes darker, not usually fond of revenge, but sana incited that feeling on her like nobody else had. “and you’re the perfect candidate.”

“i’m honored,” jeongyeon puts her bowl on a table next to the bed, more than half of it eaten. “i do know how to make you happy.”

jeongyeon takes the freedom to give jihyo’s bowl the same ending, making jihyo’s back hit the headboard, their hips side to side to each other, in a good position for jeongyeon to kiss her. jihyo closes her eyes by instinct when jeongyeon starts fixing her hair, leaving a lock behind her ear.

“it’s not because of that, though.” jihyo says, hand on jeongyeon’s waist when jeongyeon leans closer and kisses her neck. “it’s because you can do it and make it look real without falling in love with me. without it being weird.”

“i don’t do girlfriends, but i guess i’m just a natural, huh?” jeongyeon laughs softly against her neck, then pulls her face away just barely. “that wasn’t a record, by the way. we’ve gone at it for more than 6 whole hours,” she lowers her voice, “i still remember how you got me all wet towards the end, think you could do that again?”

jihyo hums. “i’m sore.”

jeongyeon brushes her nose against hers. “i’ll be gentle.”

“jeongyeon…” jihyo mutters, even wetter when jeongyeon has her hand on her thigh.

“this will be my part of the deal.”

and so it was.

jeongyeon was never an option for jihyo and neither was jihyo an option for jeongyeon.

they were honest about it when they started having their casual encounters. there wasn’t a problem in them not wanting to have a relationship, really, they were able to enjoy what they had without taking any further steps, and perhaps it was even better that way.

jeongyeon had been the one to talk about it first. jihyo was an amazing girl, the type people would fall for at first sight, but jeongyeon didn’t see a future in them as a couple, and neither did jihyo. and so, having a casual affair was easy for them, until jihyo met sana and fell in love with her.

jihyo and jeongyeon, despite ending what they had in a cordial way, simply didn’t keep a regular friendship after that, as there was no reason for them to do so — they would still meet up at times, given that their friend groups were also friends between each other, but nothing more than that.

still, there was something about jeongyeon that makes jihyo trust her. they barely ever spoke, but when they did it was as if jihyo was talking to a friend of years rather than only someone she had seemingly endless, hungry sex with.

beyond that, jeongyeon was someone who could truly understand her, and jihyo figured jeongyeon felt the same way about her. they immediately linked, and yet dating each other was never a subject between them — things were simply already good as they were.

“won’t it be a little weird, though? i had a thing with momo last summer,” jeongyeon asks, carrying both hers and jihyo’s suitcases to the back of jihyo’s car.

“dahyun isn’t the jealous type,” jihyo says, mindlessly texting momo, telling her they’d arrive before noon — until she really understands what jeongyeon had told her. “you and momo?”

jeongyeon puts the lid of the trunk down, closing it without using much strength. “…and it’s summer again, so it’s been what? a year? she probably doesn’t remember we had a thing.”

laughing slightly at jihyo’s frown, jeongyeon makes her way to the driver’s seat. jihyo follows, sitting on the passenger’s seat, hardly aware that that was her car and that she hadn’t agreed for jeongyeon to drive beforehand.

“did you have a thing with any other friend that i have?” jihyo asks, crossing her legs and putting on the seat belt. without making a complaint, she takes her car key and hands it to jeongyeon — jeongyeon decides not to make any comments about the picture of her cat for a keychain, knowing jihyo was serious about him. “careful with the car.”

“not that i know of,” jeongyeon shrugs, replying to jihyo’s question. with the key already in it’s place, jeongyeon twists it to get the car’s engine running. “i know what you’re thinking. i don’t sleep with that many girls. you were my first this year.”

jihyo hums. “and i know what you are thinking,” she looks at jeongyeon. “i’m not jealous, it’s just… interesting that you did it with my friend.”

“it was just a one-time thing. no, three-times thing.” jeongyeon mutters. “no big deal at all.”

jihyo looks at the window instead, arms crossed. “you were the one talking about it being weird anyway.”

jeongyeon smiles when jihyo pouts, doing it mindlessly. when the road is emptier, she places her hand over jihyo’s thigh and tells her to take a picture, all so that sana would know jihyo had someone else even before they arrived at their destiny.

they only had a week to do revenge, so every minute counted. the plan was to act as a couple in love during their friend trip — they went to momo’s beach house along with a couple more friends, and sana would be there, because sana was friends with momo. they certainly fought when momo found out sana had cheated on jihyo, but after an entire month of ghosting her, momo was more willing to forgive her.

to a great extent, it happened because jihyo assured momo that she was over sana, even told her to invite sana to their week out of town. despite being reluctant and having her differences with sana herself, unable to fully trust sana as a friend, momo did as jihyo said, assuming jihyo wanted sana to be there for her own reasons.

it’s already nighttime when they arrive, and nights at that side of the estate were as cold as the mornings were hot.

jeongyeon hardly needs a facade to treat jihyo well, so she wraps her own jacket around her when they’re out of the warmth of the car, telling her she’d get hot by using her muscles to carry their suitcases — which is an entire lie. jeongyeon shivers behind jihyo, but soon momo is opening the door for them and the cold is no longer as much of a nuisance.

“finally,” momo greets jihyo with a hug. “i was getting worried.”

“jeongyeon is a slow driver.” jihyo complains, clearly playful, but jeongyeon still lets go of their luggage and passes an arm behind her neck, messing with her hair in response.

“god forbid a woman drives safely.” jeongyeon kisses the top of jihyo’s head, speaking softly.

if momo was trying to mask her surprise to see that jihyo was, by what it looked, with jeongyeon, then she did a poor job, visibly taken aback, but she could only feel relief — if jihyo was with jeongyeon, then jihyo wasn’t there to get back with sana, which none of their friends would like to happen.

however, she couldn’t say the same about sana, who was there with a goal that she hid behind a wall of glass.

“i would congratulate you two now, but you’ll already hear a lot from the other girls,” momo grabs a suitcase. “come on, let’s put these in a room and come back,” she tells jeongyeon, as if jihyo wasn’t invited to go with her, then looks at jihyo. “the girls are setting the table.”

jihyo nods, knowing where to go. “be quick,” she tells the both of them.

“why wouldn’t we?” momo laughs, grabbing jeongyeon’s arm as she leaves with her, not waiting for jihyo’s answer.

jihyo doesn’t worry at all about them — momo probably wanted to have a talk with her, but jihyo was sure it was nothing related to their brief past. she makes her way to the dining room, still surprised at how big the place was, despite that not being her first time there. the last time they stayed there, she was with sana, in a happy relationship.

now, the both of them stood relatively far from each other, no longer together, hardly able to look at each other’s eyes. jihyo isn’t surprised to find her there, knowing that would happen, but she was hoping jeongyeon would be with her when it happened.

dahyun, mina and tzuyu do a great job breaking the ice, the three of them rushing to give her a hug as soon as they spot her and then they are flooding her with questions about her new girlfriend, none of them minding the fact that sana was there.

“i’ll tell you everything,” jihyo smiles. “let momo and jeongyeon come back and we’ll tell you what you want to know,” she assures. “how can i help?”

once the table is set and momo and jeongyeon join them, instead of making things awkward by letting the silence prevail, dahyun makes the question they all were curious about. especially sana, who knew jihyo had company, but she didn’t know it was yoo jeongyeon.

sana didn’t know jeongyeon. at least not enough, only that she was an acquaintance of momo and tzuyu, and that jihyo also knew her. whatever else sana knew about jeongyeon was far from substantial. the only thing she remembers, quite vividly, is that jeongyeon is a guitarist — momo might have told her when she introduced them to each other. other than a handshake, sana had never had any contact with jeongyeon.

“so, how did this happen? i thought jeongyeon would never do dating,” dahyun asks, apparently not jealous or upset about her short-term affair with momo in the past.

“so did i,” jihyo laughs, jeongyeon’s hand automatically finding hers under the table. “she rejected me because of that two years ago. but we met again last month and… well, things just happened.”

it wasn’t a complete lie, truly. jeongyeon surely hadn’t rejected her, but they did only meet again after jihyo broke up with sana, met alone, that is.

jeongyeon wasn’t a rebound by any means, but someone who made her company and gave her what she couldn’t have otherwise — pleasure and enough intimacy to talk about the things she needed off her chest. now, rather than an acquaintance with benefits, she was a friend with even more benefits. certainly an upgrade.

“it wasn’t rejection,” jeongyeon defends herself. “back then i just couldn’t see us as we are now. maybe if we got together two years ago, we wouldn’t be together now. everything has a purpose,” jeongyeon says, seemingly wise, and perhaps that was too good of an answer, because jihyo could almost believe her.

“that was actually a sweet comeback,” jihyo says, a smile on her lips, half genuine, half part of the act.

sana keeps silent where she is, both melancholic and irritated about the fact that their friends seemed to be quite happy for jihyo. she felt betrayed, ironically so, because two years back was when she met jihyo. still it seemed likely to be true, because when she met jeongyeon, jihyo already knew her as well.

momo noses in. “so you’re a real deal now, huh? never thought i’d see the day yoo jeongyeon got a girlfriend. jihyo must be special.”

“of course she is,” jeongyeon answers in a heartbeat, meaning her words. to sound less cheesy, she adds: “she deserves the best… and i am the best.”

“okay!” with the exception of sana, who remains quiet the entire time, the girls boo her — even jihyo, which makes jeongyeon pout.

“we should probably start eating now. to keep jeongyeon’s mouth busy and stuff,” momo mutters, prying on what mina and dahyun had prepared.

“jeongyeon’s, sure,” dahyun teases, knowing momo was beyond starving, no matter how many snacks she ate while waiting for the food.

when the others are not looking, jeongyeon inches her face closer to jihyo’s mouth next to her ear. “what if i want something else to keep my mouth busy?”

jihyo’s cheeks heat up, mind rewinding to only a few moments before they arrived there, in the car — and jeongyeon was already asking for more of it. jihyo had almost forgotten how insatiable they could be together, but that was part of why they got along so well. “greedy. but you deserve it.”

“i do.” jeongyeon kisses her shoulder softly, pulling away then. she reaches for a strand of hair close to jihyo’s mouth, putting it back in place with the rest of her hair, which doesn’t go unnoticed by the other girls, yet no one mentions it.

the entire time that they have dinner, sana stares at them. jihyo acts normal, she ignores sana and focuses on what is being said, sometimes smiling at jeongyeon when she kisses her shoulder or touches her arms or waist, refusing to look at sana, knowing that doing so would be seeking for validation, which she didn’t need. all jihyo really needed from sana was for her to break the same way that she did.

(by the end of the night, jihyo was only more certain that jeongyeon was the perfect candidate, and the best part of it all was it hardly felt like pretending.)

“you’re red.” jihyo tells jeongyeon, spreading sunscreen on her face a second time, only an hour after applying the first layer.

jeongyeon was relaxes on the beach chair as jihyo settles on her lap in order to do her task, amazed with how jeongyeon’s cheeks were crimson due to the sun.

jeongyeon had stubbornly rejected staying under the sunshade, wanting to stick close to jihyo as she tanned in case somebody tried to hit on her, doing her job as a fake girlfriend too well at that point — but getting her skin nearly sunburnt in the process.

“i don’t come to the beach often,” jeongyeon justifies, barely pouting.

“i can tell.” jihyo taunts, soft hands spreading more sunscreen on jeongyeon’s shoulders. “does this bother you?”

the question rises as a way for jihyo to give jeongyeon an opportunity to set boundaries between them, worried she might be doing too much — sana was looking, she surely was, but jihyo didn’t do it because of that, doing it because jeongyeon wouldn’t wear sunscreen otherwise.

and jeongyeon could decline being looked after by jihyo, free to feel like that was too much, perhaps too intimate, but she didn’t, not bothered about the fact that jihyo had been doting on her as an actual girlfriend would. it wasn’t a bigger deal, however, because jihyo does the same to mina and tzuyu. except from the part where she sits on jeongyeon’s lap, that is.

jeongyeon rests her palm on jihyo’s knee. “not at all. have you always been like this?”

“always. can’t help it,” jihyo smiles, her job finished when she can no longer see the white from the sunscreen on jeongyeon’s skin. “i just wasn’t like this with you because back then it would’ve been weird.”

jeongyeon tilts her head, slightly so. “why is that? i wouldn’t mind it.”

jihyo shrugs. thinking about the past makes her wonder how she managed to not fall in love with jeongyeon at all, but maybe her feelings only really matured after her relationship with sana. she doesn’t see jeongyeon any differently than she used to, yet now jihyo understands that, in the past, reserving certain acts of affection was essential so that her relationship with jeongyeon didn’t develop any further.

for a reason jihyo could hardly fathom, sana managed to make her fall in love in less than a month, whereas she and jeongyeon had been enjoying the benefits of a compromise-free relationship for more than three without any love. still, that was the best way things could’ve turned out to be regardless of the outcome, because if jihyo happened to fall for someone who clearly didn’t want a relationship, that would’ve been perhaps just as stressful as being cheated on.

“i don’t know. i think i would… i kept avoiding doing some things with you that i knew neither of us would want,” jihyo replies, feeling comfortable enough with jeongyeon to talk about how she felt. “in my head there was a limit that i didn’t want to cross, so i didn’t.”

“makes sense.” jeongyeon says, understanding jihyo’s way of thinking.

they remain silent for a brief moment, jeongyeon wondering if she’d been more straightforward than she should’ve been in the past and jihyo curious if what she felt was also the case for jeongyeon. jihyo guesses it was probably not how things were for jeongyeon, because someone who doesn’t want a relationship doesn’t need to methodically reject negligible intimacy in order to avoid unwanted feelings.

it’s not like jihyo wanted a relationship — jeongyeon was an acquaintance. she became a friend after jihyo met sana, but she was an acquaintance and that was all jihyo saw in her, truly, but the fact that jeongyeon had been honest about keeping things as they were made jihyo be more careful, and that was all.

if anything, in the past jihyo was the one who believed they would be better as friends rather than having sexual encounters.

they seemed to be on the same wavelength about everything, and jihyo had the perspective that being a total opposite to her loved one was a basic requirement. as that was her experience with sana, the impression turned out to stick on her, which was why jihyo was no longer afraid of doing things with jeongyeon that she wouldn’t in the past, now in terms with the way they got along in many different ways, especially sex, but not afraid of love suddenly rousing.

“we wouldn’t have time to do these things anyway,” jeongyeon laughs, breaking the sudden silence. “every moment we spent together was either having sex in my apartment or exploring your exhibitionism kink. really good times. for a lawyer you’re quite deviant.”

“there you go. i am not an exhibitionist! that was a one-time thing and you loved it,” jihyo laughs, slapping jeongyeon’s flushed arm, earning a grunt from her. “come on, you can’t be sunburnt.”

“i would hope so,” momo chimes in, standing in front of them. there’s a ball in her hand, which she supports on her hip. “can you play volleyball, yoo? we’re missing a player.”

“can i play volleyball?” jeongyeon laughs, as if momo had made her a silly question. she carefully taps jihyo’s knee, as if asking her to get up, and jihyo allows her to stand, taking jeongyeon’s place on the chair. “hirai, you’re speaking to a former team captain.”

“is that so?” momo beams, eyes shining with sudden enthusiasm — and a glint of mischief. “sana and i used to play on the school team as well. sana was the captain.”

jeongyeon looks at jihyo, not asking for her permission, but wanting to see if she would be opposed to the idea. jihyo doesn’t give her any sort of reaction, despite wishing jeongyeon would win, making it a second win for her that week.

jeongyeon smiles, taking her cap off and putting it on jihyo to keep it safe — messing up her hair in the process and making her frown. “may the best captain win.”

“is that really how the game is or were you trying to hurt her?”

jihyo asks, back at the house with jeongyeon while the girls spent more time on the beach, in charge of making lunch because she was the only one who didn’t play with them. jeongyeon follows her, both wanting to make her company and because she was sunburnt.

“that’s how it is. she didn’t move out of the way because she didn’t want to,” jeongyeon mindlessly replies, grabbing a cup of water for herself. “don’t act like you pity her. bet you loved watching her getting hit by the ball. i can say i did.”

jeongyeon smiles, wishing jihyo could feel the same joy she felt whenever the ball hit sana. the ball wasn’t made of a tough material by all means, yet jeongyeon’s hand was heavy and although her aim wasn’t sana, she was constantly hitting her throughout the game — which was more sana’s fault than it was hers.

“i didn’t know you could be so mean, yoo jeongyeon.” jihyo smiles, only because jeongyeon couldn’t see it as she was facing her back while jihyo looked for ingredients in the fridge.

a sound of steps against the wooden floor isn’t heard at all by jihyo and jeongyeon, who are in the kitchen, entirely too occupied with their dialogue to notice someone else had left the beach as well.

sana makes her way back after taking a swim, her face red from the amount of times the ball hit her, holding her tears back. sana wasn’t sad but angry — angry at her loss and angry at jeongyeon, who was nothing but a nuisance, in her way to get what she was there for.

jeongyeon leaves her empty cup on the counter, walking towards jihyo, following her when she moves somewhere else, opening a cabinet. jeongyeon stands behind her, both hands on jihyo’s waist.

while jihyo had hardly noticed someone else was in the house, jeongyeon feels a presence behind them, which only fuels her actions, mouth close to jihyo’s ear as if she wanted to keep it between them, but sana could still hear everything.

at that point, even without being able to distinguish what they were saying, sana would still be heated up, even more so when they were so close, when jeongyeon did what she used to do.

“need help, princess?” jeongyeon asks, voice suddenly raspy, using a term she has only used with jihyo a couple of times, only when favorable enough — mostly when they were both bare, doing what they deemed they did best.

“i can reach it,” jihyo says, pretending as if what jeongyeon did had no effect on her, pride hurt at jeongyeon’s implication that she was short.

she stands on her tip toes, trying to get a pan from the cabinet, questioning why momo kept those there when she wouldn’t be able to get them either. sana watches them, the pain on her face and shoulders hardly bothering her anymore, fists closed tight at the sight in front of her.

laughing, jeongyeon grabs it for her, leaving it on the counter. “there you go. this is costing you a little something later.”

“is that so?” jihyo hums.

just as jihyo is about turn around, sana leaves, hardly making a sound, only letting her tears fall because keeping them in was impossible at that point — she could still hear their laughs from her room, which led her to wonder if that pain was what jihyo felt when she saw her with nayeon.

for the biggest part of jeongyeon’s life, she hasn’t been essentially an affectionate person. not seriously, certainly not without an intention that was linked to taking a girl she is interested in to bed — and it’s not that jeongyeon was faking being nice, but she was a charmer by nature.

she finds out by the middle of the week that doing certain things with jihyo wasn’t that bad. touching a woman without the intention of immediately taking her to bed was good, jeongyeon learns, good almost in a way that was foreign for her.

in the past, jeongyeon simply didn’t want to do relationships and nobody happened to make her want that, not even jihyo.

something shifts at a certain point of her life where she sees all of her friends with a significant other, happy in their respective relationships, hence she stopped doing one night stands, finding relationships not as bad as she used to. it’s a compromise she would take with a person she loved enough.

jihyo was an exception, of course, in honor of their past together, and she needed a friend, which jeongyeon wouldn’t deny her, yet due to their deal, jeongyeon felt like quite the opposite of what she used to feel towards jihyo. in times gone by jihyo was a friend, someone jeongyeon cared about and slept with, but someone jeongyeon didn’t see a future with.

it used to be simple to think about the things regarding her love life as black and white. there was no complexity in what she felt towards the girls she’d been with, no complexity in how she felt about jihyo. jeongyeon didn’t date, jihyo was a friend, and they did what was convenient for them at the time, the both of them agreeing that they were better off as friends, both incapable of seeing themselves doing romance.

but past does not fully resonate in who jeongyeon grew to be, and perhaps the way she saw jihyo was different. it’s hard to tell when having no references of what she was supposed to feel when the time was right and she found someone she would want to build a life with, but jeongyeon starts questioning herself, wondering if she truly saw jihyo as a friend in the present time.

they were faking it so that jihyo would get some sort of revenge — that was the plan. yet jeongyeon couldn’t help but wonder if she touched jihyo the way she did for sana to see, if she kissed her because she knew sana would look, if she called her terms of endearment because sana could hear her.

certainly, jeongyeon couldn’t do romance in the past, she could barely grasp the concept of being so obsessed with someone that she would want to do everything in her hands to make them smile, to make them genuinely happy, but it happens so naturally with jihyo that she fails to realize it was happening.

“thought you would like something stronger today,” jeongyeon joins jihyo in the porch, sitting on the couch next to her. “but we only have beer.”

jihyo accepts the bottle from jeongyeon’s hand, curled upon the couch, with her knees up to her chest in her sitting position. “this one is fine.”

jeongyeon hums. late at night, the sky was full of stars. jihyo seemed to be studying them closely. “tomorrow is the last day. how do you feel?”

“the message was sent. she knows i’ll always be the happiest i’ve been without her.” jihyo replies. “that was all i wanted.”

jeongyeon nods lightly, bringing the bottle to her lips, taking a sip. although jihyo had been deep in her thoughts before she joined her, jeongyeon knew she was welcomed there, therefore the impending silence was comfortable while it lasted.

“thank you, jeong.” jihyo mutters, quiet and sincere.

only then, that jeongyeon realizes it all had just hit her.

jeongyeon knows from the way jihyo’s silent tears stained her face, falling freely without her trying to dry them up, to the way jihyo was quiet, not trying to flirt or initiate a conversation, much less giving out her frequent smiles — those were the brightest ones jeongyeon had ever seen.

“hey,” jeongyeon pats her back when jihyo can no longer cry quietly. jihyo hides her face in her knees, arms curling around her head, and jeongyeon retrieves the still full bottle of beer from her hand, leaving it on the table. “it’s okay.”

jihyo had been there before. she had cried countless times on her own after finding out sana had cheated on her, both because of sana and because of nayeon, and the intensity of the storm reduced a little each time she cried.

jihyo was over sana, she truly was, but her heart hadn’t accepted the fact that all of her love, her expectations, her happiness — her deepest, sincerest emotions, would no longer exist for sana. or nayeon, who had perhaps broken her heart whereas sana had only bruised it, denying jihyo of a friend to support her and take her pain as her own, the way it used to be.

but jeongyeon was there, and jeongyeon holds her when she cries, tightly enough that she could almost make the pain go away, giving jihyo a shoulder to cry on and a lap she can feel comfortable in.

“she was my best friend.” jihyo says once she is able to do so, a couple of tears ready to fall, but she no longer sobbed quietly into the crook of jeongyeon’s neck.

“i know.” it’s the only thing jeongyeon says, because it was enough. because jihyo wasn’t waiting for an answer, but stating what she was thinking, and jeongyeon allowed her to feel it on her own, being there for her how jihyo wanted her to.

jeongyeon doesn’t pull away when jihyo kisses her, she doesn’t think anything of it, forbids herself of doing so. she kisses her back, and it’s different from the other times. not hungry, or hot, or desperate — jihyo was thanking her, in her own, particular way, holding jeongyeon’s cheeks with a hand as her lips warmly touched hers, soft and sweet.

jihyo places a chaste peck against her lips, finishing their kiss, then opening her eyes to look at jeongyeon. “i don’t… i don’t want you to think that i’m doing this- that i’m kissing you because i want the pain to go away and you’re how it goes away. i want to let you know that.”

with a hand on her waist and the other on jihyo’s face, jeongyeon nods, her thumb caressing jihyo’s bottom lip. “okay.”

“we’re not so bad at this, huh?” jihyo asks, bringing the sun back when she smiles, so brightly that jeongyeon wondered if the other stars were envious.

“we are not.” jeongyeon answers, hardly aware of what jihyo meant, but if she meant that doing romance didn’t feel that impossible for them anymore, then jeongyeon would agree. (she doubted that was the case.)

relatively far from them, sana and momo watched them, only arriving when jihyo was no longer crying, but kissing jeongyeon with no intentions of taking that to bed, laughing when jeongyeon stopped kissing her to crack a joke.

momo sighs, nearly regretting going out with sana and leaving dahyun at home, knowing that she was probably sleeping then.

“they’re cute, don’t you think?” momo asks, crossing her arms as she looked at the couple that wasn’t yet a couple — and she knew because jeongyeon wasn’t able to hide it from her. momo was simply able to read jeongyeon beyond her words, aware of things jeongyeon kept hidden even from jihyo.

“no, i don’t, momo.” sana clenches her fist. “why did you let her come?”

momo ignores her question. “i do. it’s good to see that jihyo found someone good for her. and i know jeongyeon, she will never break her heart.”

unable to keep looking at jihyo, sana shifts, looking at momo, her eyes dark. “you used to know me too.”

“i can’t live my life waiting for the people around me to reveal themselves as deceptive, awful people, can i?” momo asks patting sana’s shoulder, a sad smile on her face. “and here i was thinking you regretted.”

momo leaves, sana doesn’t utter a word. she looks at jihyo again, cries because she didn’t mean to speak the way she did with momo, and because jihyo was happy without her. already.

the last day of their trip is the least eventful.

at night, jeongyeon leaves for a party nearby with dahyun and momo after jihyo insisted for her to go if she wanted to have fun with them, the rest of them stay because they are tired. leaving jihyo alone wasn’t something jeongyeon truly wanted to make, but jihyo convinces her that she should have fun if she wanted to, and so jeongyeon leaves.

mina was there and so was tzuyu, yet sana seemed like the invasive type of person. without her or momo there to protect jihyo, jeongyeon worried about what sana could do or say to her — she was worrying a lot, too much, and jeongyeon didn’t feel like she shouldn’t be feeling that way, but avoiding it seemed impossible.

jeongyeon’s worries were justified and sana does reach out to jihyo, finding and opening when tzuyu and mina go to their room and she stops jihyo from doing the same.

“i want to talk to you.” sana says, noticing the way jihyo reacted when she touched her arm. sana quickly releases it, anxious, desperate to find a way to stop hurting jihyo with her actions, but apparently even standing in front of her was enough to feel like she was doing so.

jihyo keeps a firm stance, with her arms crossed. “what do you want to talk about?”

“should we do this outside?” sana asks, looking everywhere but at jihyo. “i just need some fresh air. i won’t take much of your time.”

jihyo doesn’t feel like accepting sana’s request. they had talked about it — everything that had happened. jihyo had been clear that she would never want to go back to sana. she’d been clear that she didn’t want to know about nayeon, clear that she didn’t want sana to explain why she had done what she did. sana respected her decision because it was the least she could do, still wanting to get jihyo back, but keeping the requested distance.

until something threatens her, that is, and sana feels like going over the promises she’d done for momo and attempting, even if one last time, to get jihyo back. when jihyo agrees to talk to her in the porch, sana feels relieved, leading the way with jihyo behind her, and jihyo was as worried about her decision to talk to sana as jeongyeon was worried about her decision to leave.

“so, what is it you want to say?” jihyo asks, impatient, wanting the safety of her room and the safety of jeongyeon.

“i want you back.” sana states, from the beginning of their conversation. “the thing you have with that woman can’t be as serious as our relationship.”

jihyo can hardly believe what she hears. she’s immediately irritated, because sana was so wrong, but the instant urge to snap at her isn’t enough to make jihyo say or do anything. jihyo stares at sana with a blank expression, her breathing becoming heavier the more sana spoke.

“nayeon was in love with me when we met.” sana explains, although jihyo didn’t want to hear. “when i found out, i felt guilty... so guilty. i didn’t notice she had those feelings for me. it’s not like it would change what i feel for you, because you’re the most perfect woman i’ve ever met, but there’s so much i could have avoided if only i knew…”

sana gets closer to jihyo as she speaks, with only one intention behind her actions. even sana didn’t believe in her own words, sounding fake, making it obvious that she was merely keeping jihyo there for a reason that wasn’t apologizing or justifying herself.

jeongyeon only stays at the party until she knows momo and dahyun will be fine without her there, heading back as soon as she has the opportunity. she arrives on time to see sana and jihyo talking, and despite wanting to give jihyo space, desperately wanting to move, she stays at the entrance of the porch, watching and listening.

“no, sana, let’s not lie here. i was a prize to you.” jihyo says, taking a step back when sana gets too close. “i don’t care about nayeon’s feelings because she didn’t care about mine, and i refuse to talk about her with you. those were two years of my life that you wasted. my life,” jihyo says, her face red with sheer anger. “and i wasn’t even happy with you.”

sana raises her eyebrows. “of course you were.”

“at the beginning, yes, it was perfect. but then you became distant, and…” jihyo shakes her head, letting out a sigh. “no, i’m not having this conversation again-”

jihyo’s voice dies down when sana kisses her, holding her hips tightly, enough to make jihyo grunt in pain. jeongyeon doesn’t have to intervene, because jihyo bites sana’s lip, her palm falling heavy on sana’s cheek.

“you can’t replace me with someone you barely know.” sana snaps, ignoring the heat on her cheek.

“i’m not replacing you,” jihyo replies, cleaning her mouth with the back of her hand. “jeongyeon isn’t a sidegrade. she will never be that. she’s so, so much better.”

“jihyo, it’s been a month. a month.” sana says, as if she was pleading for something she knew she wouldn’t have back. she takes a step closer to jihyo again.

“i won’t be the one slapping you if you touch me again.” jihyo warns, and sana seems to realize her surroundings. momo and jeongyeon would arrive soon, and if jihyo wanted, they would make her regret doing anything against jihyo’s will — besides, it wasn’t like sana to act that way, and the anger vanishes when sana comes to understand what she’d just done.

jihyo leaves her alone, but after taking a few steps away, she stops. “by the way, sana, jeongyeon and i were already together for months before i met you. it wasn’t a month that made me fall for her.”

jeongyeon had heard most of it. she saw jihyo stand for herself and then she left, feeling as if she’d seen more than she should have. jihyo leaves after speaking to sana, spends a few minutes cooling down at the beach, then heads back inside when it gets too cold.

for her surprise, jeongyeon was already back, lying down with her eyes closed. thinking she was asleep, jihyo silently changes her clothes, joining her on the bed then, carelessly making her way to jeongyeon’s arms for some cuddling. but jeongyeon wasn’t sleeping, so her hands naturally find jihyo’s waist.

“sana talked to me.” jihyo mumbles, head on jeongyeon’s chest.

“i know.” jeongyeon replies. “i saw.”

jihyo’s heart races at the thought of jeongyeon listening what she said about her, but she decides not to talk about it. “i’m sorry.”

“what for?” jeongyeon asks softly, a hand brushing jihyo’s lower back under her shirt, the other finding the back of jihyo’s knee when jihyo passes her leg over her hip.

jihyo sighs. “bringing you into this. i shouldn’t have.”

jeongyeon hums. “doing this made it better, didn’t it?”

“yes.” jihyo replies sincerely, feeling lighter after letting sana understand she wasn’t as important for her as she might have thought she was.

“then don’t apologize.” jeongyeon mutters, her voice low.

jeongyeon shifts, barely so, making jihyo open her eyes and look at her, the tip of their noses brushing against each other.

“i’m sorry still.” jihyo insists.

it’s only when jeongyeon pulls away, wanting to see her face before kissing her, that she notices the tear stains on jihyo’s face and how red her nose and lips were from crying.

despite it irking her that sana had made her cry once again, jihyo was the most beautiful when she cried. jeongyeon hopes, instinctively so, that in the future jihyo only cries out of happiness, so she could enjoy the way she looked without feeling an annoying pain in her chest.

“so pretty.” jeongyeon whispers, moving a lock of hair behind jihyo’s ear.

jihyo sighs, eyes closed, feeling a tender kiss on her jaw. “jeongyeon…”

“jihyo.” jeongyeon answers.

jihyo says nothing in response, letting jeongyeon place kisses everywhere — from her jaw to her neck, and when her shirt was somewhere on the ground, on her ribs, then on her tummy.

even if jeongyeon knew all of the corners of her body, it was still new to have her kissing her so passionately everywhere. tender, as if that was their first time together and, for some reason, jeongyeon had to be careful.

jihyo keens when jeongyeon pulls her for one last kiss, tongue brushing against hers so gently she felt like crying again, and she’s unusually flushed when jeongyeon has her head between her legs, taking her time kissing her thighs before she got to take off the last piece of clothing preventing jihyo from bareness.

maybe they really weren’t that bad at romance.

a couple of weeks later, they’re back with their monotonous routines.

jihyo stays longer at work every day, because working made her mind occupied, and she needed to have her feelings at rest before she understood what had happened between her and jeongyeon in their last night together at their trip. jeongyeon on the other hand was already in terms with her feelings, she had been in terms with it, and so she waited, because she was confident jihyo felt the same.

it isn’t until nearly a month after everything happened that jihyo reaches out to her. jeongyeon is waiting for a cab after rehearsing all afternoon, guitar on her back, phone in hands, when she receives a call from jihyo. she picks up in a heartbeat, and jihyo smiles, watching jeongyeon from a safe distance, aware that jeongyeon was there because one of her friends had told her.

“hey, jeongyeon.” jihyo says, holding back a soft laugh.

“hey, jihyo.” jeongyeon greets her back, certainly flirting, just as the usual.

jihyo takes a few steps closer to jeongyeon, unaware of how much she’d missed her until she smells her perfume and her heart aches, desperate to hug her tight.

“would you go on a date with me?” jihyo asks, close enough so that jeongyeon could hear her, but jeongyeon doesn’t notice her presence whatsoever.

jeongyeon makes a noise, as if she was thinking about it. “when?”

“now.” jihyo replies, bossy, not willing to give jeongyeon a choice.

“sure,” jeongyeon says, checking the watch on her wrist. still early enough to do many things. “should i pick you up at work?”

“i’m picking you up this time.” jihyo hangs up, smiling as she appears in front of jeongyeon.

“oh, hey.” jeongyeon breathes out, unusually nervous, but still flirty. “you look beautiful.”

jihyo nods, knowing that already — she worked hard to look pretty for her. she wraps her arms around jeongyeon’s neck, using all the courage she’d gathered during those weeks she had no contact with jeongyeon.

“i’m in love with you.” jihyo states rather than confesses, coming clear with her feelings.

jeongyeon shrugs. “i figured.”

jihyo opens her mouth, slightly shocked that that was jeongyeon’s reaction. “aren’t you happy i’m reciprocating your feelings?”

jeongyeon shakes her head. she grabs one of jihyo’s hands, placing it over her racing heart. “i’m worried.”

jihyo’s eyes widen at how fast it was beating, and that was all because of her — that was, by far, the most beautiful proof of her love jeongyeon could’ve given her. jihyo has to get on her tip toes to peck jeongyeon’s lips, a soft smile permanently on her lips.

“i’ll take care of you.” jihyo promises, aware that jeongyeon had no experience with long time relationships.

“no. i’ll take care of you.” jeongyeon affirms, stubborn, passing an arm behind jihyo’s neck so that they could walk side by side. jihyo passes an arm around her waist, the most comfortable way she could hold jeongyeon, really, given their height difference. “i need coffee.”

“the coffee i make is delicious.” jihyo suggests, but soon she reformulates. “you’ll try it later. we can’t go home now…”

“yeah.” jeongyeon laughs, knowing too well what would happen if that was the case. “come on, there’s a really good cafe nearby.”

#non rq #jeongyeon #momo #sana #jihyo #jeonghyo #sfw #ish #i guess

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