#not saying book 4 wasn't angsty

[taxidermy-tuesday]

the tone change was insane

original:

[moonsbypadfoot]

can you make another theo nott headcanons?? <3

I do not have anything specific in mind but make it angsty?? I guess

also I made the text small so it'll fit your blog's aesthetic <3 ❤️‍🩹

obviously I can make another theo headcanon 🪼

Theodore headcanons | pt. 2 🩶

(I think I'm dyslexic, so please excuse any typos)

+ kind of an x y/n?? , second pov, longer than the last one

for the little woman fans!

🩶

theo draws like a pro but then complain of how 'cattivo' (which you haven't figured out what it meant yet) his drawing is, even though it is beautiful?? Like what??

theo tries to speak as if he's in an Shakespeare book and his friends (Draco, and mattheo) would laugh at him at how ridiculous it sounds because they don't understand him plus, his accent makes it more confusing

after his friends laughed at him, he would get all grumpy and sad. that's where you hopped in.

"theo, what's wrong? " You scrunched your face. "Theo? " you said, once more, but the boy didn't even move a muscle.

I forgot to tell you, when he's grumpy, he gives everyone the silent treatment.

but, you're an exception.

"theodore, what happened? " You sighed, looking down at Theo, who's head was on the table.

"nothing is wrong" Theo scoffed.

also, he doesn't want to bother you, that's why he tends to lie sometimes.

"something is wrong, look at you! " You said, softly touching his hair, trying to make him look at you.

"fine" he pauses "something is bothering me" he rolls his eyes.

"well what is it? " you gave a small smile, after finally convincing him to tell you.

"can you teach me english? "

at that second you swear that you could laugh "Theo? What? You're speaking English right now! " You chuckled

bad mistake ; he got more grumppier.

he gave you a nasty 'mhm' and lays his head back on the table.

"hey I was just joking, but, nonetheless, you're already good at English"

"see? you know when to put 'nonrtheless', I don't even know what that means! "

The next day, you took him book shopping (for everyone's sake, everyone knows a grumpy Theo isn't a good Theo), and you paid for him

Instantly his mood was better, and he took you to drink at the three broomsticks.

theo keeps smiling and looking at the totebag you crocheted for his 14th birthday. inside was the books you got him.

(he was most excited for little women)

theo paid for the butterbeers you both drank.

after that, it became your weekly thing to go to the three broomsticks every Sunday.

theo also starts to call you 'amore mio', but whenever another boy calls you 'love' he immediately assumes things.

at valentines day, he was weirdly quiet, until he suddenly came to you

"y/n" Theo said, not looking directly at your eyes. "yes, Theo? "

"that's for you" theo sighs.

you gave him a big smile, and hugged him, though, he didn't look very happy.

It wasn't a secret that Theo has a big crush for you, well, lorenzo kinda spoiled that for you,

(talking with enzo, 4 months before valentines)

"I may know a guy who likes you" Lorenzo said, all giggly. You gasped. "Tell me who it is! "

"No I can't! " Lorenzo laughs.

"I swear I'll kill-" He cuts you off, "okay, okay fine! But you cannot tell him nor anyone that I've told you this"

he paused for a second. "it's Theo!! "

It also wasn't a secret that you like him, Lorenzo also spoiled that for him

(2 days before valentines)

"Theo, I need you to do a favor for me"

"What? " Theo groans, dog-earring his little women book.

"You need to make a move on your girl" Lorenzo said, making Theo scoff the second he hears that. "hey, she likes you! "

"Ridiculous" Theo said, opening his book again.

"I will, and you must hear me. It's no use, Jo, we've got to have it out, and the sooner the better for both of us," he answered, getting flushed and excited all at once. "Say what you like then. I'll listen," said Jo, with a desperate sort of patience. theodore was a young lover, but he was in earnest, and meant to 'have it out', if he died in the attempt, so he plunged into the subject with characteristic impetuousity, saying in a voice that would get choky now and then, in spite of manful efforts to keep it steady... "I've loved you ever since I've known you, Jo, couldn't help it, you've been so good to me. I've tried to show it, but you wouldn't let me. Now I'm going to make you hear, and give me an answer, for I can't go on so any longer."

After he read that, he realized that if he waits anymore longer you and him wouldn't work out just like theodore Laurence and josephine march.

"Maybe you're right, Enzo, maybe I need to make a move" He said, which made enzo confused but, he was happy either way.

well long story short, that was the start of your lovely relationship.

the whole reason you two got together was because of a book and you think it's absolutely beautiful and poetic 🩷🪼

[choicesficwriterscreations]

June Creator of the Month: Thosehallowedhalls

Please welcome this month’s Creator of the Month is @thosehallowedhalls.

Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists. The writer or artist is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page. Past COTM's can be found here.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog Masterlist

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played?

I can't remember exactly. 2021, I think? Laws of Attraction was on its tenth chapter.

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

I joined in January of this year. I was upset with Crimes of Passion 2, so I wrote a couple of stories about it. I had deactivated my old Tumblr long ago, so I had to open a new one.

3- How did you pick your blog name?

I love old buildings - the history, the ambiance. I tried hallowedhalls, but it was taken, so I added the article.

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!

I… have zero recollection of this post. But I'm big on nostalgia and mourning past times, so the fact that this was my first post tracks.

5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both?

I write fanfiction. I've been teaching myself to draw, but I'm not anywhere near close to sharing what I do.

6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?

I started writing fanfiction way back in… 2010? For about four or five years. Then I stopped until December 2023.

7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?

Crimes of Passion on both counts.

8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?

That would be The 2 AM Christmas Tree Farm, inspired by The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. I do still like it, but I would tighten up the writing a bit. I had barely written any fiction for several years at that point, and the lack of practice shows.

9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created?

I keep going back and forth between The 2 AM Christmas Tree Farm and Home Without. Both are angsty short series.

10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?

I was taken aback by the comments on The 2 AM Christmas Tree Farm. I'd posted it on AO3 a few weeks before, and had gotten a handful of kudos and one comment, but within 24 hours of posting it here, I had several lovely reblogs. It was a welcome surprise. Stories with fewer comments… I guess Home Without. The first chapter got quite a bit of love, but by the time the final chapter rolled around, fewer people were interacting.

11- If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?

I love a balance, but I'd say angst with a happy ending. I enjoy the breadth of emotions angst lets you explore.

12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

There are bits and pieces of me in all of them. Emma has my sarcasm, and Raine has my need to look for the best in people. There may be more, but if so, it wasn't done intentionally.

13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?

Perfectionism. Like I said before, the lack of writing practice shows. I know that the only way to get better is to keep writing, but I hate seeing the gap between what I do and what I want to do. Catch-22.

14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

My Sebastyan x Emma fic, Of Cloudless Climes and Starry Skies. There are only a couple of chapters left, but I've been struggling with it for a couple of months now.

15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first?

Oh, hell no.

16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?

So many writers have influenced my writing throughout the years, including authors I do not currently read. The Brontë sisters, Charles Dickens, Nora Roberts, Jane Austen, Courtney Milan, Alyssa Cole… I could go on and on. Fanfic writers… There are a lot, but off the top of my head, @inlocusmads, @coffeewithcutcaffeine, @gaiuskamilah, @aria-ashryver, @jerzwriter, @dutifullynuttywitch, @aces-and-angels, @petalouda85, and @storyofmychoices. I know there are more.

17- Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series?

Home Without. I'm a sucker for good pining, and I'd love to see all that mutual longing play out onscreen - not to mention that reunion.

18- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art?

I do. I'm currently working on a horror short story, a MG novel, and a dual timeline mystery that's still in the research stages.

19- What other hobbies do you have?

Reading, non-fandom writing, drawing, learning new things (especially languages!), going on walks, and drinking enough coffee to alarm medical professionals anywhere.

[jamie-leah]

Lifeline Pt 4

Bucky x Reader

Series

Summary: You have a past that you're running from and maybe Bucky can be the lifeline you had no idea you were searching for.

Word Count: 1,570

Warnings: Descriptions of domestic Violence, Self doubt, Angst

A/N: I wasn't expecting this scene to turn out so angsty but the characters run the show, I just type letters. Enjoy!

<-Previous Part Next Part ->

Masterlist of Masterlists

You look up the length of the Tower building, the cold air stealing your breath. You’re not sure if this is a good idea anymore. You agreed to the meal in the book shop because Bucky was so cute asking and the smile afterwards was worth it. And you also wanted to see the family he has now.  

But actually standing outside the Tower? Moments away from meeting the people that Bucky live with, that he considers friends and family? Coupled with the fact that you and Bucky clearly have something special? It’s enough to make you want to run away.  

Bucky gives your hand a squeeze, pulling you gently into the building. He nods to the receptionist but doesn’t break his stride to the elevators. Pushing a button, Bucky glances to you with a warm smile, “you have nothing to worry about.”  

You laugh, “is it that obvious?” 

Bucky shrugs, “I mean, I would be nervous meeting a bunch of superheroes who are just as likely to hug you as they are to run background checks on you and grill you over dinner.”  

“Wait, they’ve run a background check on me?” 

Bucky squeezes your hand again, “I don’t know, I wouldn’t put it past some of them, like Nat and Tony but it’s fine.”  

“Have you ever...?” 

Even though you trailed off, Bucky understands what you’re asking, “no, I haven’t looked you up or asked anyone to. I figured I would get to know you the old-fashioned way.”  

His comments make you smile, but your anxiety quickly steals that away from you, “it’s not the fact that they’re superheroes.”  

Bucky frowns, “no? Then why are you so nervous?”  

You roll your eyes playfully, “Mr. Clueless.” 

You both chuckle as you continue, “because, they’re your friends, family. People that you’ve gone to hell and back with. They’re probably the most important people in your life.”  

The elevator dings when Bucky says, “you’re important to me too.”  

Bucky pulls you through the doors as a smile spreads across your face. You repeat his words in your mind as you get closer and closer to the voices down the hall. It helps to ease the racing in your chest.  

“Steve, have you ever seen Bucky like this with anyone?”, you hear a female voice ask.  

A man chuckles, “not like this, no.”  

“If she had any sense she would run in the other direction.”  

“Sam!”  

“I was kidding mostly. He’s so grumpy all the time, I don’t know how she has any fun around him.”  

“Maybe she’s just as grumpy.”  

“Natasha!”  

“Kidding!” 

“Can we please just have a nice dinner with no bickering or arguing? Just this one time?”  

Bucky steps into the room, your footsteps slightly behind, “I don’t think Sam or Nat can keep their big mouths shut long enough.”  

All heads swivel to Bucky and you. Fighting the urge to fidget, you lift your gaze to meet theirs. Steve is the first to jump into action. He sticks his hand out to you, and you take it with a gentle shake, “it’s nice to finally meet you. Bucky has talked a lot about you.”  

A small smile fights to the surface, “he has? Sounds like Bucky is the one with the big mouth.”  

The silence only lasts a moment. A booming laugh falls from Bucky’s lips, head tipped back, eyes closed. The rest look shocked before joining Bucky in various rounds of laughter.  

“Okay, definitely not grumpy.” Sam concludes.  

Natasha smirks, “keep this one, Barnes. I like her.”  

Bucky looks down to you, murmuring, “I plan to.”  

And just like that you fit right into the dynamic like a glove. Steve loads the table up with different Chinese dishes. Sam puts the plates out, while Natasha sets up the cutlery. Bucky shows you to your seat and takes the one on your left, explaining why the others can’t make it tonight.  

Once everyone takes their seats, the table descends into chaos as they all scramble to fill their plates with all their favourites. They fight over the portions and sharing the rice. They laugh when Sam spills sauce down his top, or when Steve eats something spicy. They chat about their days and things that need doing in their world all while joking and bickering.  

And you watch it all with affection but slight envy. They include you, of course. They get your opinions on things they can’t agree on or ask questions to get to know you. You love every second of it and you envy how you missed out on this growing up. The easy nature of loving people. And being loved by them in return. Trusting them enough to know you and not destroy you.  

When the food is mostly gone and the talking dies down, Natasha studies you holding a glass of wine to her chest. She asks, “so, how long are you planning on sticking around?” 

Lips parted in surprise; you don’t answer right away.  

Steve says her name in a warning tone and if looks could kill Bucky would have killed Natasha on the spot.  

Through all this she continues to stare at you, waiting.  

You clear your throat, “how much do you know?”  

“Enough.”  

Bucky leans forward, “Natasha, don’t.”  

She levels her gaze on him, “how much do you know, Barnes? Do you know she’s married? Still? Do you know how she’s bounced around the country, not staying anywhere longer than two months?”  

You notice the surprise on Sam and Steve’s face. Good to know they didn’t all go snooping.  

Bucky shoots up from his chair, glaring at Natasha. Natasha puts her wine down and stands slowly. They look about ready to rip into each other.  

“Do you know why?”, you ask.  

“I saw the hospital records.”  

In the corner of your eye, you can see Sam and Steve making the obvious connections. But you continue to look at Natasha, “so you understand?”  

She sighs, “to a point. Look, I like you, I do. And it’s nice to see Bucky happy for a change. But if you take off, then it’s us that have to put the pieces back together.”  

You get it. You really do. But you feel a fire spread out from your chest and into your limbs. Anger, like you’ve never felt before comes crashing to the surface like a stormy sea. Anger that no one is considering what any of this means for you. Anger that Bucky has all these people looking out for him and you have no one. You were a good wife. You were a good person and yet you’ve ended up with no one. And this only proves that point.  

You shake your head, “none of you get it. If I stay after he finds me then I’m dead. None of you know him like I do. You can look up his history and see where he was born, who his parents are, his friends. See his military background and all the connections he’s made since. But you don’t know what his hatred looks like. You don’t know what his fist feels like when it connects with your jaw. You don’t know just how cold the floor is when you’ve been curled there for hours after he’s kicked you over and over, telling you to be better, to do better...If I stay, you’re asking me to give up.”  

You stand from the table and make your way to the exit. Bucky tries to reach you as you pass him, but you dodge his grip. Pausing before leaving the room, you add, “and he always finds me.”  

You don’t look back as you make your way to the elevator. You wonder why the world looks so blurry and unsteady when you feel the familiar trail of wetness roll down your cheek. You’re not cut out for this. For family life. Not anymore. It’s too hard, too terrifying. You’re not strong like them, you can’t stand and fight and no one can save you. They’ll only get hurt, either by Andrew or you when you leave.  

Bucky calls your name, running down the hall to catch up to you before you get on the elevator. He spins you to face him, “she shouldn’t have said that-” 

You hold your hand up, the fight leaving your body all at once, “I respect her for wanting to protect her family. Maybe I would do the same in her position, especially when it comes to you. I just need some space.”  

You step on the elevator and press the button for the ground floor. Bucky holds the doors open, “I’ll give you the space. I’d give you anything you want if you asked. I’m heading out on a mission early morning, we just had the call, but...I get it. I really get it. How hard it is to let people in when all you’ve had is yourself. But you’re not alone anymore. At least, you don’t have to be.” 

He steps back, “don’t let him take anymore from you.”  

The elevator doors close. The image of Bucky looking sad and lost burned in your brain is one you can’t help comparing to the last time you looked at him when the elevator doors closed at your building. And you can’t help wondering if he would be better off without you. Either way, you know it’ll haunt your dreams tonight.  

Tag List: @ordelixx @cjand10 @identity2212 @sukaibg @bellabarnes1378 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess

[cbrownjc]

hi! i had some questions for you as someone who only got into iwtv post season 1 of the show starting to air. i read from some of your other posts that you've been a fan since the 90s, and you mentioned how DM fans were disappointed post TVA. so i was wondering, what was the fandom like back then? did people mostly write about the chase/human!daniel era, or did people ever try to write fanfics that continued their story with them still together as vampires despite what anne rice decided on? i know what the trends were like on ao3 (i got obsessed with DM before season 1 even finished airing, i read the books that fast) but i was wondering if it looked different at all back then (pre-ao3). secondly, i was also wondering if most people ignored the "no sex" element of canon and included sex scenes in their fanworks, or if most of the work you saw was more at the canon level of erotica/blood drinking level? it's okay if you don't really remember, i'm just curious about fandom trends. the tidbit about the "boss" thing being fanon since the 90s despite it only being said once was very amusing to me (i noticed that myself haha)

Hello! Sorry for just getting to your question today, real-life things, and all that. 🙂

So, from what I remember from back then, (from the mid-90s to the early 2000s), at least from when fanfic was still not banned yet (😉) is that when it came to Devil's Minion, fanfic did have a mix of people writing things were Daniel was still human and people speculating on what Daniel and Armand's relationship was like after Queen of the Damned and Daniel had been turned. But I would say the Devil's Minion era -- when Daniel was still human -- was much more focused on a bit more since, at that point, there were only four books out, and not too much time had passed between book 3 and book 4. And because the Devil's Minion Era lasted 12 years in total there were at least more situations and ideas that were easier to get ideas to write about.

When it came to post-Daniel being turned, before The Vampire Armand came out, there just wasn't much of anything to go on. So it really was just speculation galore on that front, but there wasn't all that much to solidly speculate on.

At least until Armand seemingly killed himself at the end of Memnoch the Devil. Then I remember a lot of angsty Daniel-focus stories during that time after that happened. Or, angry fix-it fic because there was a very vocal group who kept arguing that Armand killing himself over what he did was just wildly OOC in the first place.

As to the "no sex" thing, there were some who very strictly followed it and those who, IIRC, would put a disclaimer at the start of stories stating that the characters would have physical sex in the story. Stories that had physical sex scenes between characters still tended to have the character still do blood drinking too, however.

In remembering things from back then, however, I'd say more people leaned into the "no sex" thing more than they did the characters having physical sex . . . even after The Vampire Armand book came out. Because even with the things that happened of a sexual nature in that book, there was a hot debate about if what went on between Armand and Marius, and Armand/Marius/Bianca really counted as sex or not. And most people fell on the "it wasn't sex" side of things about all of that.

In fact, I remember a long email chain post in my mailing list after that book came out arguing about this and someone even adding it to the FAQ for the mailing list that no, it did NOT count as sex because as a vampire, Marius wouldn't have/didn't get aroused or use his genitalia during the moment between himself and Armand in the bath; and then again with Bianca neither Armand nor Marius could have gotten aroused in that way because they were vampires, despite Bianca getting pleasure during that encounter because she was still human at the time; so it didn't matter that Marius used his finger on her and whatever, vampires still couldn't have sex.

No there were not a lot of human AU stories back then, not even to get around the "no sex" thing wrt canon back then either. People either stuck to the blood-drinking as erotic or, again, put disclaimers at the start to say the characters were having physical sex. That was it.

[recurring-polynya]

Orihime gives Chad a manicure to see if it powers his arm up and also because she thinks it would be a nice thing to do for a friend. Chad is always doing things for other people without a second thought and I think Orihime would pick up on that.

I was rolling this around in my head, trying to decide when I wanted to set it and who else I wanted to be in it, when I got punched in the face with this mildly angsty idea, which ended up twisting the prompt around a little bit. (I feel like I always do this to you 😂. Maybe I do this to everyone.) Anyway, I hope you like it! I love them so much!!!

Takes place in the early Blood War, around the time when Ichigo goes to the Royal Realm, shortly after the first set of battles, while Orihime and Chad are still in Hueco Mundo.

(read on ao3)

💅 💅 💅

Orihime didn't know what she was thinking when she grabbed the nail polish off the shelf in her bathroom. It was a 16-in-1 gel palette set (with 4 metallics!) that she had won last fall as a fifth-place prize in a contest they were holding down at the shopping district last fall. She hadn't yet taken the plastic wrapping off. She had been saving them for a special occasion.

A war was not a special occasion.

Orihime had to admit that she probably panicked a little. Mr. Urahara was opening Garganta back to the Living World twice a day so that Mr. Tessai could bring various supplies that he needed to Hueco Mundo. Orihime had been shooed through so she could pack some clothes and whatever else she needed, and to let Tatsuki know that she wasn't going to be around for a bit. It had made sense at the time, but once she was actually in her apartment, her vision narrowed down to a dark tunnel and she had to gulp big deep breaths of air because it was all too much like the time Ulquiorra had given her twelve hours to say good-bye to just one person.

She got it together eventually and did manage to find Tatsuki and Keigo and Mizuiro, too. (Ishida wasn't around, but he had known where they were going.) Still, though, she wondered what she had been thinking when she got back to Hueco Mundo and found her bag packed with every pair of underwear she owned, her winter coat, a jumbo-sized box of Hello Panda that she must have stopped somewhere to buy, and the nail polish.

There had been a lot of waiting around, once she had finished healing everyone who needed healing, so maybe she had been thinking it would be a nice way to pass the time. Maybe she had thought the Tres Bestia would like it. They probably would have, but Urahara had already sent time off on some errand. Nel wasn't interested, although she was very interested in the Hello Panda.

So Orihime painted her own nails. She painted her pinkies and her thumbs with the metallic silver, and then drew on the six-petaled flower of her hairpins on top in teal. She painted the rest of her nails in teal. She had planned to paint a flower for each of her Shun Shun Rikka on each of the remaining six nails. The left hand actually came out pretty good! The right…

"Is something the matter, Inoue?"

Orihime blinked rapidly and looked up. She'd been staring so hard at her own efforts that her eyes had gone dry.

Sado had been sitting nearby, reading a book, with a massive set of headphones over his ears, things he had brought back from his own whirlwind trip home. Sado hadn't had much to say since Ichigo left, but Orihime had noticed that he preferred to stay within eyeshot of her. Tatsuki's cat did that with Tatsuki's mom, who had rescued her from a sewer grate as a kitten. Now, Sado was peering down at her, the headphones slung loosely around his neck.

"Ohhhh, I was just wishing I had put the camellia on my left hand," Orihime sighed. "Ayame and Hinagiku will understand if their flowers are a little shaky, but Tsubaki is going to be so mad."

Sado frowned thoughtfully. "Would you like me to help?"

Orihime's mouth dropped into a soft 'o'. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised. She'd seen the doodles Sado did in the margins of his schoolwork. It was usually graffiti-style Spanish words, but sometimes (usually when class was particularly boring) he'd draw out an entire lion, all rippling muscles and fangs, or a sleek motorcycle with highlights and shading that made it look like it made of chrome and leather and rubber, even though it was really all just pencil.

"The brush is very small," she said stupidly.

"It's fine," said Sado.

Barely a minute later, a miniscule camellia graced her right index finger, perfect right down to the lacy stamen.

"How did you do that?" Orihime gasped.

"I don't know a lot of flowers," Sado admitted, "but I know how to draw camellias. Abarai and I used to have a lot of time to kill while we were recovering from throwing boulders at each other. He can only draw about three things, but one of them is camellias."

"What are the other two?" Orihime asked shyly. The idea of big, tough Abarai drawing anything was very cute to her. She wondered if one of them was bunny-people.

"Skulls," said Sado. "And Zabimarus."

The last they had heard, Abarai had been very badly injured and so had Rukia, but both were expected to make it. Orihime pressed her lips together. Of course they were going to make it. They were both very, very tough. Next time she saw Abarai, she would ask him to draw a Zabimaru for her.

"Do you want me to do the other two?" Sado asked.

"It's a daisy and a hibiscus," Orihime said. "Do you know how to draw those?"

"I can manage a daisy," Sado agreed. "I am actually pretty good at hibiscus." That made sense, of course, given Sado's collection of tropical shirts.

"Thank you, Sado," she said, watching him work. He was very good at using pressure on the brush to get little petal-shaped blobs of paint. She wondered if he ever painted, in addition to drawing.

Sado sucked in a breath. "Do you think…" he started, and then started again. "Do you think we could do mine next?"

"What? Yes! Of course!" For a moment, Orihime was so excited to have finally found a taker that it took her a moment to be surprised. "I didn't know you liked to paint your nails, Sado-kun!"

Sado finished the hibiscus before speaking. "I don't. I mean. I haven't ever. Before."

"It'll be your first time, you mean?"

"Yes." Sado paused. "But I've wanted to. Ichigo and I went to a punk show once. A band he liked. He painted his nails black. I was…I mean, it looked…well. It's Ichigo. You know. He's braver than me."

Orihime started to argue with that, then stopped herself. "Not many people are braver than Ichigo," she said instead.

Sado gave a curt nod. "That's why I want to do it."

They did his left hand in white and red and black, with bold stripes and zigzags and a slightly melty-looking skull on his ring finger.

"Should we do the right in black and bright pink?" Orihime asked, eying the same beautiful fuschia Sado had painted her hibiscus with.

"No," said Sado. "My right hand is the one that protects. I want to paint it with the things I want to protect. So for the first one, I want you to paint it silver, with a teal flower, just like yours."

For a second, Orihime couldn't breathe. "Sado-kun," she finally said, "shouldn't Ichigo be the first one?"

"Ichigo is the first person I want to protect," Sado agreed. "But you were the first person I trained with. You're the person I've always trained with. So you should be first."

She couldn't argue with that, so Sado's thumb got painted to match hers. Orihime wasn't very confident in her ability to draw Ichigo's substitute badge, but Sado believed in her, and they both agreed that Ichigo wouldn't mind if it was a little wobbly. They did the background in sparkly gold, which they also both agreed that Ichigo would approve of.

They were going to be fighting Quincy--they had already been fighting Quincy--but they decided to paint the middle finger white with a blue cross anyway, because Ishida had it first. Just because the rest of the Quincy were turning out to be jerks didn't change how they felt about him. The middle finger felt somehow appropriate for that.

There was some debate over disrespectfulness, but they couldn't bring themselves to do it the other way around, so the ring finger was for Abarai (a black lightning bolt on a red ground) and the pinkie for Rukia (a silver snowflake on purple).

Orihime looked down at Sado's hands resting on the table. They were wide and powerful, with thick, knobbly boxer's knuckles and traced with silvery scars. His fingers were long and elegant, though, slightly tapered with square, even nails, now covered in bright colors and sparkles.

Orihime placed her own hands on the table, spreading her fingers wide to mirror his.

"I'm glad I brought the nail polish," she declared, to herself more than anyone else. "They don't have enough color in Hueco Mundo."

"Mm," Sado agreed.

It occurred to Orihime that both the shinigami and their enemies favored black and white, at least officially. But when she thought of her friends, she could only think of splashes of color--the wrap of a sword hilt, the flutter of a scarf. Eyeshadow and bright hair and the lining of a haori.

"Do you like it?" Orihime asked.

"I do," said Sado.

"It might chip," she warned. "Just let me know. I'll fix it if it does."

Sado smiled down softly at their colorful, sparkly, not-quite-matching fingertips, nearly touching. "I know you will."

[kaija-rayne-author]

I guess the discourse today is about Astarion being the favourite poster boy of the devs to the detriment of the other characters.

Yes. That's unequivocally true. Wyll having so little compared to Astarion is also an example of racism.

It's also capitalism. Larian can't make more games unless BG3 does well. So far it has, so in their choice of poster boy they chose correctly.

Every business, especially entertainment ones, follows a similar model. Develop stories or games that the previous game helped fund. It's common in book publishing too.

(Which, tbf, is my realm of knowledge, but the business facts are the same.)

What you, if you're indie, or the publisher, if not, chooses to spend time on is the thing/character/aspect/story that will sell the most copies so they can stay in business.

They bet on Astarion being popular because:

1. Vampire, vampire stories don't seem to get old. People want more.

2. White hair, if you're at all into gaming or anime, you should recognize the white-haired anime boy coding Astarion has.

3. He's pretty. In games & books like these, people want to get turned on or be sucked into emotions, that's rather the point. So, of course, they made him pretty and gave him an angsty backstory about it. Have you noticed that his vampire fangs are the more traditional style and the rest have funky (and likely more efficient) chompers with the fangs on the front teeth?

4. Twink, you'd have to be really not paying attention to not notice that one. They tend to be attractive to the largest section of players.

6. Slow burn, a lot of people prefer slow burn romance.

7. Classically handsome. You could turn him into a statue (and can!) and he wouldn't look out of place.

I don't experience this type of point form character building, my characters tend to march fully formed into my head and demand I write them.

But Astarion was built as a fictional character that would (hopefully) capture a broad cross-section of players and give the game some more sex appeal.

Sex sells.

I'd lay money I don't have on every aspect of Astarion's character having been a deliberate choice to encourage sales.

And that's fine. That's what capitalism does. Don't like it? Start voting for social support programs and things like ubi so that people can create without worrying about the bills.

Is it fair to the other characters and to the gamers who love other characters more than Astarion? Absolutely not. I do hope Larian gets the message and produces more content to make them all equivocal.

Especially for Wyll, they did him so dirty.

Is Wyll having the least lines and scenes racist? Yup.

Larian, despite their faults, produced something that so few games companies have done recently. A single purchase, single player RPG without micro-transactions that was an excellent game straight from release.

Other games companies are bitching about that because it's like sand in the oyster of their business models.

Which, for a while now, has been to roll out a game that wasn't ready yet and use the players as unpaid, uncompensated labour to find bugs etc. As a gamer, I've really hated that.

Did Larian fuck up? Uh, yeah. On several issues. But they also made an amazing game that was awesome from release.

It would be a shame to lose sight of that.

It's important to call out the shite when we see it, but the current 'it has to be perfect for me, or I won't play' attitude rampant on the 'net these days is disturbing to say the least.

I've read Larian has a feedback thing on fridays. If this really bothers you, hustle on over and participate in the feedback session.

They're still actively working on the game. They can still make changes and they seem reasonably responsive to fan feedback.

But just remember... the reason Astarion is the poster boy with the most content is because of capitalism. It was likely a cold, business focused decision vs anything else.

Which doesn't make it better. I just figured inserting a bit of entertainment business knowledge might be helpful to the discussion.

[smutinlove]

You were my light

Carl Grimes x Reader

Warnings: A little angsty, mentions of death, slight torture (not really), mentions of blood, slight small description of blood, carl grimes being a jackass (sorry baes), a little violence, gun mentions, use of knife (chill y'all), mentions of character death, ugh sad sad sad, depressing shit ig, kidnapping (it's.... hot... if carl does it), sadness (????) 🤨

☽ Author's note☾ I'm writing this for fun cause I'm bored. Oh, my God! How shocking! I know. Right?? Tell me how it is. PLEASE. Anyway. Show some love by reblogging and liking it. <3 This is made by me just like all my other fics are. DO NOT STEAL, COPY, OR TRANSLATE MY WORK.

Thank you to everyone who reads this!

[I think I might even make this into a small little series.]

Part 2 is here

Part 3 is here

Part 4 is here

Part 5 is here

≿━━༺❀༻━━≾

Summary - The daughter of the now dead Negan Smith is walking in the woods. She thought she was alone. But she wasn't.

❝ There's things I wanna say to you But I'll just let you live Like if you hold me without hurting me You'll be the first who ever did ❞

≿━━༺❀༻━━≾

Lucille Smith used to say, "You can find light in the darkest places." It wasn't a lie, it was a bit complicated for you, Y/N Smith, to understand. "Mom, what does that even mean?" You asked.

"Oh, sweetheart, why don't you go upstairs and find that book you like? We could read it together." Lucille, your mother, suggested.

"Okay," You gave a sweet smile before rushing upstairs.

There was a box full of books. After almost an hour of searching, you finally found it.

You ran downstairs, "Mom, I found it—"

≿━━༺❀༻━━≾

You walked through the woods, in desperate need of some fresh air. After Rick killed Negan, your father, you were so tired of everything. Hell, you almost thought of 'offing yourself.'

Negan, no matter how cruel he could be, he was still your father, you still cried almost every time you thought about him. It had been six years since your father died. Shit...

You were alone like always. It was peaceful but it could be sad sometimes.

As you were walking through the woods, you heard a twig snap.

You took out your gun and pointed it in every possible direction. It was a walker. Instead of shooting, you unsheathed your knife and jammed it into the skull of a walker. You took the knife out, and a bit of Walker blood got on your white t-shirt, but, hey, who would care anyway?

"Nice, what are you? A fucking dumbass? Wandering by yourself? All happy and shit." A voice said from behind you. "What?" You raised your gun and turned around. "Who the hell—"

≿━━༺❀༻━━≾

And now you found yourself with a bag over your head. You couldn't breathe, it felt like the world had ended. Maybe, you were in hell. You killed so many innocent people. Maybe, it was them who took you away. Maybe they were gonna torture you and then slowly kill you.

The bag over your head was taken off. Your hands were tied behind your back. A familiar-looking boy was standing in front of you.

The boy was wearing a cowboy hat, which was the first thing you noticed when you first saw him in the lineup.

He had one eye, which you already knew. But it was unknown to you how he lost it. "You're pretty. What's your name?" He asked.

But you remained silent. This boy was familiar. He...

He was Rick Grimes' son. Carl Grimes.

Carl smiled. "Not a talker, 'ey?" He chuckled. "That's fine until I beat it outta you." He laughed.

To him, you looked familiar. But he couldn't figure out who you were exactly.

Carl laughed, "God, you are so cute, ain't ya?" He placed a hand on your cheek. "Look at me, sweetheart. Oh, you are a pretty little thing, aren't ya?"

You looked away. You didn't know this man well. Why? Why would he talk to you like you were his lover or whatever?

"Talk." He demanded. You wouldn't budge.

He slapped you, "Talk, now." He demanded.

Carl turned around, "Daryl will be rougher. And right now, I'm just being nice. Very nice. Now, what's your name, sweetheart?" He asked once again.

"Y/N," you reluctantly answered. Then, it hit him. He figured out who you were and now had an angry expression on his face. Why did your dad have to kill so many people, especially those two men?

"Cute. Why were you out there?" He asked. "Stop," you muttered. "Why should I stop, hm? Scared, sweetie?" He taunted. You looked up at him and tilted your head, "No. But you should be. 'Cause after I get free, I will kill you, you motherless son of a bitch!" He chuckled and grabbed you by your shirt. "Oh, sweet. A girl is threatening me." His laugh sent shivers down your spine. It was as if he didn't even care about your threats or how annoying and uncooperative you had been. It was as if he was used to this. "You know what?" "What?" "I'll be back, and you better start talking. Otherwise, you'll never see the sun ever again. But," of course, there was a 'but.' "Maybe, you'll join your daddy in hell, Y/N Smith." He smirked and left. It felt horrible. God, it was one of the most hurtful things he had said. And now, you promised yourself that you would kill Carl Grimes. No matter what, you will kill him.

...

Part 2?

[fazedlight]

How I think the Supergirl seasons should've gone...

Season 1: Leviathan

Hear me out. By far the biggest screwup of season 1, in my opinion, was getting rid of Kara's status as the Last Daughter of Krypton so quickly. I want to see more of her angst as a character, as a refugee from a dead planet, coming into her own powers. Give me the complicated emotions of missing her family, of feeling like she is honoring their memory, of wishing she had more guidance from her culture and values.

Starting with an Earth-based villain is a good scope for season 1. I think Leviathan could be reimagined to be remaining an Earth-based villain (none of this "technology" plot). What if they want to decimate all humans via increasing natural disasters? How would she stop them, when destruction is so much easier than creation?

Season 2: Rhea & the Daxamites

Season 2 was actually a great villain setup (Mon-El aside). I don't have many complaints here from a Big Bad perspective - Rhea was interesting and compelling, and it was fun watching her manipulate her way into a world invasion.

(I will say, if they wanted Mon-El to be a vaguely compelling character, they either should've made him some sort of freedom fighter rebelling against his parents, or they should've made Daxam a less terrible planet to begin with - with Kara learning how much propaganda she had been fed on Krypton.)

Season 3: Worldkillers (feat. Villain Alura + Worldkiller Kara)

There are hints that the original plan for season 3 was to have Alura amongst the Juru witches and Kara as a worldkiller (I may have written a fic on that). We could've combined the worldkiller arc, with Kara's angst about her parents' flaws and her existence, with Kara finally learning that she wasn't the Last Daughter of Krypton.

Her people would be alive - at a cost. Suddenly she'd be thrown into this conundrum... what did it mean to be kryptonian, and what did it mean to be human?

Season 4: Lex (and xenophobia)

Much like season 2, I really liked the existing plot of season 4. I'd make some minor changes, but overall it was a strong season.

Seasons 5 & 6

The Lex redux is kind of weak (and Lena's villain era, if she had one at all, should not last an entire season). Nyxly and Lex were the worst combination ever in my book. Not a fan of these seasons' big bads and I don't want to reuse them. But there are a few other options:

Bringing in Astra and Non at this point might be interesting. After the Daxamite invasion, the first solution people would think of would be "what if we spread kryptonite in the atmosphere?" with obvious angsty implications.

I would've loved to see Brainiac here. Perhaps he's mad that he didn't get to bottle Krypton before it exploded, so he wants to bottle Earth since it has the last kryptonians left. (Would've been an interesting arc for Brainy, too.) Or maybe he bottled Argo City.

Nyxly could've been a better solo villain, I think. I'd remove her backstory with the king/etc - make her some unhinged imp who somehow got around the usual limitations on 5th dimensional magic usage.

There are other great classic villains, like Darkseid.

As a final aside, I really loved the Red Lantern Kara arc in the comics, and wish they had done that on the show. It could've been...

A solution to the Astra/Non/Myriad problem. I thought the season 1 ending was kind of cheap, in that Kara only won because all of the kryptonian criminals were asleep on Fort Rozz when she was fighting Non and Indigo. Having Kara go red lantern and wipe them all out instead would've been immensely satisfying.

It could also have been an angsty response to Lena's betrayal, perhaps combined with the above.

Overall, the point is that there should be increasing stakes as time goes on. Moving from physically destructive villains (with increasing emotional cost) to something more vague and existential (the risk of being frozen in time, brainwashed, or fighting an unknowable magic) would've been a good escalation path for the show.

[jojotichakorn]

for the game - phum 🤲

you said i should do all of them, which is insane, but also thank you weeeee ✨🫶

i'm gonna put the headcanons under the cut though, y'all can send asks with other characters (& emojis) from here

🏳️‍🌈 a sexuality headcanon

i personally definitely headcanon him as gay.

🏳️‍⚧️ a gender headcanon

a good ol' cis boy.

😇 a headcanon about their religion/lack thereof

hmmm... i'd imagine he's probably not religious, because he was shipped off from thailand at a really early age, and no one was socialising him and really involving him in the culture oversees either, so religion probably just kind of naturally passed him by. at this stage, i also can't imagine when he would discover it later in life on his own either.

🧸 a headcanon about their childhood

well 💀 horrors beyond our comprehension, basically. tbh, we know quite a bit about it, but just to solidify, i think 1) his parents and oldest brother genuinely never called to talk to him; 2) fang did call almost every day, but it got to this slightly weird juxtaposition of like "oh, you're calling me, but then if i start complaining about the horrific situation i'm in, you shut me down", so it wasn't Great, 3) the distant relatives he lived with did not care about him at all, it was truly unimaginable levels of neglect; 4) he had zero friends and the "i cried every day" thing was not an exaggeration.

👻 a headcanon about what scares them

well, we know about heights. for some reason, i also think darkness. that's if we're talking specifically classic fears. if we're talking more psychological - definitely fear of rejection and abandonment.

👽 a headcanon about a weird quirk of theirs

i do not think he sleeps with his plushies, that's not really their function. they are a comfort item during the day and also just a special interest on their own, as a collection.

💤 a headcanon about their sleep

i actually think he has a really hard time falling asleep, specifically because he isn't used to feeling safe, and that's also why he wakes up at the smallest sound.

🦾 a disability headcanon

autism in the biggest boldest letters.

💝 a headcanon about their love language

i'm gonna be honest, it's all of them equally. he is very acts of service, he starts driving peem around everywhere almost right away, he exchanges food with both peem and fang, so they wouldn't eat what they don't like. crossing over into gift-giving as well, he bought peem a bunch of seafood even though he doesn't eat it because they were at sea and peem would have wanted to eat it, he buys peem stuff all the time tbh, he pays for toey as well. quality time is also up there - he follows peem around everywhere and doesn't mind just sitting there in silence while peem works on his art. physical touch, of course, he can't stop touching and kissing peem. finally, words of affirmation, he is really good at compliments and just talking about how much he loves spending time with his friends etc. like i always say, his heart is the size of a skyscraper, and he has so much love to give.

🫂 a friendship headcanon

he still has a really hard time making friends and i think it will take him a long time to actually start hanging out with his new friends from peem's friend group separately and not when everyone is invited.

💔 an angsty headcanon

his self-worth is incredibly shakey, it's truly like a game of tumble tower, when you can see that it's gonna fall on the next player's turn. and i think that, though it will get better, especially if the family thing is resolved correctly, it will genuinely take decades to deal with it fully.

🪢 a headcanon about their family

his parents are gonna get hit by a bus that will be driven by someone who looks suspiciously like me :)

📓 a headcanon about their hobbies

i think he definitely has a hobby that involves a lot of reality-escaping. probably not video games, because i can't remember seeing a good pc/console at his apartment. i am leaning more towards books and/or movies/series, something like that.

👗 a headcanon about their clothes

he does not really care about fashion rip 😔

🔪 a headcanon relating to fighting/violence

unlike fang, i actually don't think he was ever that big into it. he ended up in a couple of fights anyway, because of fang, but he himself is very 👉👈

🌟 a headcanon about their desires/wishes

i think he wants kids, but is afraid he is going to make a terrible father, because he hasn't really had any good examples of parenting throughout his childhood.

🥇 a headcanon about what they’re best at

perhaps a slightly weird answer to a question that's probably leaning more towards skills and achievements, but i'm gonna say taking care of people. he is very attentive and loving, he is genuinely just incredibly good at the small gestures and remembering things about other people and giving the right gifts and saying the right thing at the right time, etc. etc.

🍫 a headcanon about food

he eats a very limited amount of food, which is also why fang can only cook spaghetti - he learned to cook it specifically for phum, and phum just kept asking for the same thing every day. i wouldn't be surprised, if he isn't actually allergic to seafood as well, but just says that, because it's easier than explaining that he eats exactly seven foods and nothing else.

🎭 a headcanon about what they lie about

his exact feelings about his parents. i think he's been shamed a lot for feeling the way he does towards them, so he keeps making things up and skirting around the conversation, so he wouldn't have to directly say "i do not want to see them anymore".

❤️‍🔥 a romantic headcanon

he is extremely romantic in my opinion. i think he believes in soulmateism and true love and the whole shebang. i think he watches lots of romcoms and has probably seen every mlm storyline in existence, dreaming of his own gay little relationship. he has all the proper romantic gestures down to a fine art too, obviously.

💄 an appearance headcanon

yes, he did dye his hair that shade of brown to look more like a teddy bear. slash srs

🖕 a headcanon relating to anger

anger is his mortal enemy. he has a lot of it pent up inside (understandably so), but he thinks it's a very ugly feeling he is "not supposed to feel", so he suppresses it. whenever he feels angry, he just kind of goes inside his shell and leaves the situation.

😺 an animal related headcanon

he is a cat person (hence, peem).

😬 a headcanon about the worst thing they’ve done

straight up the agreement he made with peem at the beginning.

😭 a headcanon about the worst thing that happened to them

being abandoned by his parents at five years old.

😶 a random headcanon!

he isn't as close to toey as he'd like to be, because he is 1) autistic and 2) not particularly well-socialised, so he has a hard time really understanding what social rules to follow for their particular relationship. in his head, he definitely considers toey his younger brother and would absolutely just spoil him rotten and hang out with him a lot, but not a lot of that gets actualised in reality, because he's a little afraid of making any sudden big moves or actively saying that he feels about toey the same way fang feels about him.

[sneverussape]

For the asks :33 some fun ones and a lot of angsty ones. As always, feel free to skip if this is too many!

8, 9, 10, 13, 16, 33, 36, 41, 50

u know for whom :3

ah my friend you do me a great favor by asking for angst specifically XD i shall do my best to deliver!

8. Unpopular opinion about them

in the same way that people love to argue that lily was such a 'bad friend' to severus, severus also could have been equally toxic for lily. she was right to break off the friendship if she had felt unsafe. she was right to have set up boundaries to protect herself. she was not responsible for severus or for his happiness and ending their friendship could have been the healthiest way to move forward.

i'm also on team average!height snape (6ft is the tallest i will accept as his height but he's so willowy it doesn't really make him look formidable). compared to his da, he's pretty much a runt.

9. Scene that first made me love (or hate) the character

already answered here!

10. Best moment on screen (or in the book)

ooooh i have several favorites in the books, but one is this scene:

“That is just as well, Potter,” said Snape coldly, “because you are neither special nor important, and it is not up to you to find out what the Dark Lord is saying to his Death Eaters.” “No — that’s your job, isn’t it?” Harry shot at him. He had not meant to say it; it had burst out of him in temper. For a long moment they stared at each other, Harry convinced he had gone too far. But there was a curious, almost satisfied expression on Snape’s face when he answered. “Yes, Potter,” he said, his eyes glinting. “That is my job.”

i like it because it cements him as one who truly understands and accepts his responsibility that he is the adult in the situation and they're supposed to be doing the hard work, not the children. there's also a sliver of trust between him and harry in this scene that rarely shows itself: harry has just practically outed him as a spy, but he stays calm about it and merely acknowledges it. a begrudging sort of respect has started to form between the two shown by how, even though severus insults harry at the onset, he also allows harry to acknowledge the reality of their situation by letting him freely say what he did with none of the usual repercussions. the 'almost satisfied' expression was my undoing. you can say severus was almost proud.

it's rare that an adult actually treated the kids the same way snape did in this instance. they (dumbledore, the weasleys, mcgonagall, etc) always vacillated between treating them like babies by not allowing them to know of any sort of information, or cutting them loose to let them fend for themselves. you can tell snape didn't want them to fend for themselves. he wanted to help, and proved it by doing everything in his power to lead the kids to the next step of their mission.

13. Dumbest thing they’ve ever done

i know i wrote about the hippogriff scene based on canon events but as an hc...i'd say the dumbest thing he's ever done was provoking local cokeworth hooligans to a brawl when he was younger, on one of those days that he desperately needed to feel something after the falling out with lily. it's not that he didn't know how to fight back with his fists; he did, but he had also deliberately picked a gang of 4 (and wasn't that familiar) probably just to prove to himself that he could take them on. he was sorely mistaken in that regard. his parents had been apoplectic with rage and mam spent a good bit of that week's earnings on potions ingredients so she could brew him bruise balm and blood replenishers. taking him to st. mungo's would have raised ministry alarms for wizard endangerment and none of them wanted that. da kept trying to get him to tell him the boys' names but severus kept his silence. it didn't matter anyway.

16. Deepest darkest secret they won’t even admit to themselves

hmm. maybe that there were times when he did enjoy the surge of power that came with being a death eater. he didn't like acknowledging it because he was deeply uncomfortable with the notion that he truly was the sadist many of the children saw him as.

also that petunia was a pretty bird, especially when she was a teenager while he and lily had still been children, but that's something he had buried deep in his unconscious mind, way before it was even a coherent thought.

33. Something guaranteed to make them cry

old muggles who were homeless or begging on the streets.

mr. khatry's red curry.

his students' atrocious spelling and writing. (dumbledore really should overhaul the curriculum to include english reading and writing classes for these miscreants; he spends far too much time teaching the little fools basic syntax and grammar when he could be focusing on the actual subject matter).

36. Their favorite season

summer! not only are there no classes but he deeply enjoys how long and languid days the days are. it's also the time of the year when he spends the most time out in the sun since he has to help with the upkeep of his neighbors' homes. this always results in him getting a bit of a tan that's made all the more evident when he troops back to the castle. minerva teases him mercilessly for it and he always lies and says he got it vacationing in pompeii or alexandria or some other exotic location. minerva doesn't believe a word of it but enjoys their little game and always asks him for stories about his travels which he embellishes with ridiculous details.

there's also a single week in the summer when time seems to stand still and the air seems breathless and the ghosts of his childhood seem to hold out their phantom hands out to him. he disappears for hours on end on those days, and no one dares to ask where he's going or where he's been. he always comes back at the end of the day, rumpled and slightly disheveled, with his head hung low. the neighbors know well enough to keep their distance on those days, and collectively breathe a sigh of relief when the winds turn once the week is done and severus is back to his acerbic self.

41. If they could have lunch with anyone in the world (living or dead, from any fictional universe or the real world), who would it be?

this is a good question! knowing severus and his incessant thirst for knowledge, he'd probably choose someone he could learn from, like merlin. lunch would be spent not eating but for learning and experimentation. other viable choices would probably be alan turing, charles darwin, and salazar slytherin.

50. A memory they’ve blocked out

i've written a piece about this before that i never published. instead of one, i'll give you four memories straight from that piece :)) they revolve around the breaking down of his and tobias' relationship.

--

cw corporal punishment by parent (switching)

excerpt from In the House of My Father (unpublished):

—

“Da!”

The first memory: he was six years old and clattering down the stairs just as his father opened the door. Tobias was large and took up the entire frame of the entryway. He easily picked Severus up as he came running, then swiftly moved him onto his shoulders, securing the boy’s balance by placing his hands behind his back for support.

“’Ere’s me lad!” his father shouted, his voice booming in the tiny hallway. “The tallest boy in the world!”

“Aye!”

“Wipe your shoes before you come in, Tobias, I won’t have you messing up the floor I just cleaned, you hear me now?” Eileen’s voice could be heard from the kitchen, strained with tight annoyance. “And wash your hands before you come for supper. Bring your son with you.”

Your son. Severus felt a burst of pride at that label. Of course he was his father’s son. Who else would he be?

“Ye hungry, lad?” His father asked, peering up at him.

“Starvin’, Da.”

“Ye’r sayin’ grace tonight, ye hear? Can yer remember them all? Them’s big words.”

“’Course!” He had spent most of the day committing to memory the short prayer Da usually had them utter before meals, no matter how meager. Tobias agreeing for him to say them that night was the proudest moment of his young life. He was not going to let his Da down.

“Tha’s a good lad.”

--

The second memory: him at eight in front of the mirror as Eileen brushed out the tangles in his hair. He was wearing his best shirt, the white one with the crisp collar, and trousers his Mam had freshly ironed, the one that had nearly no patches. These were his Sunday clothes, and he secretly looked forward to wearing them after a whole week of wearing the ill-fitting outfits he had to endure on other days.

Eileen stood behind him, gentle in her ministrations as her long smooth fingers ran down his scalp.

“Won’t you come, Mam?” Severus asked, although this was an argument they always had and the answer was always the same. It never deterred his determination, however.

“No, Severus,” came the predictable reply.  

“But why?” He couldn’t help his statement from curling into a whine. “Yer already missed my Holy Communion!”

“We’ve discussed this before. I never perceived you a dense child.” Eileen raised an eyebrow at him in challenge and Severus huffed. “Do stop.”

“It’s just Mass, Mam. Fr. Delaney says—”

“This is something between you and your father and I cannot join, Severus.”

“But you’re married!”

“It is allowed for us to be so. That’s hardly the point.”

Severus crossed his arms. “All yer havta do is sit there and copy what Da and I are doin’…”

“Severus.” Eileen sighed. “It’s not the same. I do not belong to that group. I do not share the same beliefs.”

“Oh? Is it the same as Da not bein’ able to do mag—ow!”

To his surprise, Eileen’s grip on him tightened and he was wrenched sideways to look up at his mother. Her eyes, which were usually dark and emotionless, were suddenly clouded. The breath she released was a tremble. Severus stared back at her, confused.

“Mam? Are you…”

“Severus, you must never mention magic in front of your father.” Her voice had dropped to a harsh whisper, and her nails were digging into his shoulder. He winced. “We’ve discussed this before! Do you want all your magic to be taken away? Do you want us to be taken away?”

Severus shook his head, suddenly unnerved by the change in his mother. “N-no. Never, Mam,” he whispered.

“Good.” Her grip on him loosened, but only by a fraction. “I do not want to discuss this again, do you understand? Or I will leave you here alone, Severus. I swear it. No more of this talk.”

“Y-yes, Mam.”

--

The third memory: The first time he had done accidental magic that he could remember was as he watched his father make his way down the icy steps of their home on the way to work. He didn’t know how old he was. But Tobias had slipped, his boots suddenly unable to keep his balance, and all of a sudden, he was tumbling headfirst onto the street, seconds away from cracking his head on the frozen pavement—

Severus raised his hands instinctively and his father’s form hung suspended in the air as though he was held back by an invisible force. Moments later, he crashed down, face first, but this time he had had enough time to shield himself with his arms. The commotion was loud enough to alert his mother, who rushed out of the kitchen and into the cold to see what had happened.

“Tobias!”

“It was angels, ‘Leen! I swear to Christ, the hand of God jus’ saved me!”

--

The fourth memory: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

“Bend over.”

Severus was ten. There was a scorch mark near the wall where the fire in the grate had flared up with his accidental magic. His father had not seen, but he had heard the argument that had taken place between Severus and Eileen. He had heard his son’s raised voice and had immediately appeared, switch in hand.

“Bend over now, Severus!” Severus bent over. Five strikes against his bare bottom made him howl in pain, and he had not hated his father any more than that moment.

--

and that's it! i never finished this piece hehehe. but i thought it was appropriate because he starts remembering these as he lay dying in the shrieking shack. :3

[mindtrove]

Inquisitor tag game

Damn haven't done one of these in a while.

Tagged by the lovely @emmg and I have to strongly agree. While I look forward to Veilguard. My Inquisitor will always be my baby. Moro is very special to me and as the years have gone her lore and her personality have really been enriched (especially in BG3, because of course I had to shimmey her over there)

So here's the answers to all the questions with how Moro would react accordingly:

1. Their reaction to the Evanuris

I think deep down Moro will be extremely relieved that she's taking a backseat this time around. Don't get me wrong (I've decided her daughter will be my Rook) she's not going to leave Rook to completely take care of everything but I definitely see her being overwhelmed by the entire thing.

To begin with Moro wasn't born Dalish and didn't really choose to join them, as she was too young to make the choice. So she was more agnostic than anything else and had more of a "it'd be nice to believe we have our own gods and they watch over us" as suppoed to resolute blind belief. So the Evanuris coming back would be a very "Oh...shit...well...that's awkward.."

2. How are they saying hi to Solas (punch/kiss/hiss/once again—middle finger/offer him a stylish hat??)

As fun as it would be to keep things super angsty, I think Moro would have come to terms with their relationship's end. But I think she'd still hold a grudge about losing her arm.

Solas nervously see's her form across the room and waves and she smiles back and waves with her cut arm then just give him the stink eye lol

Solas is definitely not over it though. They'd argue a lot about how to advise Rook/Ramia. They'd probably argue about a lot of things that ends with their tongue's down each other's throats.

3. What’s their go-to reaction when Cassandra Allegra Portia Calogera Filomena Pentaghast recommends them a book?

Moro's never read a smut novel in her life. She'd be polite and accept the book and then end up down the smut rabbit hole.

4. What did they do at the Winter Palace? No like really. Hook up? Get drunk and chat with the golden nug? Egg on every noble?

She would have definitely felt out of her element. I think when not down to business. Solas would have been trying to keep her calm and getting her to try enjoy the night.

5. This is very important—did they have the ugly Qunari Par Vollen bed in their quarters and if not why did they make the wrong choice? (lmao I love that bed, so stupid)

I had to google that shit cuz i couldn't remeber it why the fuck does it look like that?! XD

6. Who is their bff?

Varric. Before Solas the one thing they have in common is being hung up on their ex.

I think Varric is also that person that always reminds the protagonist that they're still a person and not to get swept up by what everyone wants from them and I think that's something Moro needed.

7. What have they been up to in the 10 years between Inquisition and Veilguard?

Moro has a brother. He was taken to the Circle as a child while they still lived in the alienage and she's spent her whole life accepting he was either dead or she would just never see him again.

Turns out he's not dead and has been doing well for himself in Nevarra despite being a mage and an Elf. I think he would have come through and once he'd proven that he was indeed her brother he would take taken both her and Ramia into his protection to get them away from everything and let her heal.

Clan Lavellan got wiped out during Inquisition so they had nowhere else to go. So she's spent the last 10 years catching up and rebuilding a relationship with him. She lost her arm and a lover but she gained a brother, which would be really great for her. Despite some of his tendancies, i peg him as neutral evil alignment lmao but he is genuinely happy to know he does have family again and his sster and niece are exempt from his more morally questionable dealings.

8. The most important question: how do they plan to annoy Solas in Veilguard?

She's going to be very passive aggressive. Lot's of tutting and scoffing at anything he discusses.

Chilling on a couch with a glass of wine while he makes battle plans and he can feels her eyes on the back of his head and it'll drive him nuts.

She'll claim everythings fine but he knows it's not fine but he can't get her to to be honest and it's just a never ending cycle.

Gosh I haven't thought about DA Moro for a while, especially while writing (i need to hurry with those) the BG3 version of her atm but this was fun! Halsin is defibnitely healthier for Moro than Solas is but who doesn't love some good toxic sexual attraction.

[thinkofmehoney]

"Smell that, it's wet grass and smoke in my hair."

Chapter 4

<- previous chapter

Summary: Ao'nung feels overwhelmed, he worries too much about what his teammates will think about him, which ends up hurting other people. And where Kiri has a hard time at school, still being seen as the weird girl, but unexpectedly ends up meeting someone kind.

Notes: Hi!! As some of you may know, this chapter was originally more fluffy, but it didn't felt right tbh, sooooo now enjoy this angsty chapter!! ;)

Warnings: bully!ng

3,8k words approximately

It was around 9 AM, and the last thing Neteyam wanted to do was being in biology class, it felt like a sick joke after everything that happened the day before. But there he was, looking at his book and notebook on the desk without knowing what to do.

He tried to pay attention to the class and to get any bit of information to enter his brain, but he just hated that damn class, he isn't even planning on studying something related to biology anyway. So he just gave up and let his mind be free and think about anything else.

And his eyes landed directly on Ao'nung.

The curly haired boy seemed focused on his text book, it seemed like he understood every phrase and every question, and even weirder, it seemed like he was actually enjoying it. Neteyam didn't think that Ao'nung would be good in science, but well, he didn't actually knew much about him anyway

Which led him to think about the day before. They haven't talked about it, I mean, they haven't talked at all as usual, but Neteyam felt like he should say something, he should tell Ao'nung that he's grateful for his help. Maybe Ao'nung wasn't that bad after all

He spent the rest of the class drawing doodles on his notebook and eventually writing some things down, until the bell finally rang. Everyone got out of the classroom and dispersed around the school, he knew that the Metkayina would be at the school's gym playing with his friends, so that's where he'll go... after thinking about it for a minute .

The thing is; his mind was blank. He didn't know why, but he got nervous at last minute. He would ask him to talk, and then what? What would he say then?

ೃ༄*ੈ✩

Ao'nung grabbed his bottle of water while he and his friends from the team took a small break before continuing to play.

"Bro remember when that forest boy passed out yesterday?" Nash'vi, Ao'nung's not exactly dearest friend said laughing, just like the rest of their teammates when they remembered what happened to Neteyam. "He fell straight to the ground when we where just warming up, I wanted to laugh so bad." Another boy, Tsu'hak, agreed with him.

"Neteyam might be good at basketball, but he's still a freak just like Lo'ak and their weird sister. Right, Ao?" They turned to look at Ao'nung, who wasn't laughing, but quickly smiled and agreed.

"Ao'nung." They turned around and saw Neteyam walking towards them.

"Speaking of the devil." Tsu'hak said jokingly to Nash'vi as he looked at Neteyam. The rest of the boys dispersed to start playing again.

"Hey, can I talk to you for a second?"

Ao'nung could feel the eyes of his teammates looking at him as they whispered and laughed, making him anxious. "Uh, sure, let's go outside"

They stood right outside the gym, next to the entrance. Ao'nung knew that his friends were listening to them, so he couldn't be all nice to the freak of the school.

Easier said than done.

"So? What is it?" Ao'nung had an arrogant tone to his voice, his arms were crossed in his chest and Neteyam was already regretting this.

"Well, about yesterday…" Ao'nung laughed mockingly, interrupting him, and Neteyam just looked at him weirded out. Why was he acting like this? This wasn't the Ao'nung that was so nice to him the day before.

"When you dropped dead during practice? That was hilarious." Ao'nung heard some giggles from inside the gym. He made them laugh, that was good. "I guess not being in your natural habitat is getting to you."

"What is wrong with you?" He could tell Neteyam was hurt, he could see it in the way his eyes glistened. He was regretting this from the start, but he couldn't stop now, he knew everyone was listening to him.

"There's nothing wrong with me, forest boy." He noticed how Neteyam went from dejected, to immediately put a shield in between them and start being defensive. If Neteyam was being vulnerable just seconds ago, now that was completely gone. And it was Ao'nung's fault.

"Okay, if you wanna be an asshole, fine, i'm done with you" He raised his voice just enough to sound intimidating. He took a step forward so suddenly that made Ao'nung take a step backwards. "I just wanted to be polite and thank you for helping me yesterday after I dropped dead" He pressed a paper bag against Ao'nung's chest. "I bought you a lemon cake, you can eat it or throw it away, I don't fucking care anymore." Ao'nung looked at him speechless, he couldn't even dare to feel guilty, this was the consequence of his actions.

"Neteyam…" Before he could process it, the boy was already walking away.

He heard his teammates talking and laughing, and that's what he intended, to make them laugh, to be fun and careless as always, but now it felt bitter, now he realized how much of an idiot he was.

ೃ༄*ੈ✩

Neteyam walked hurriedly through the hallways and went into the bathroom and locked himself in a stall. Once he was alone and didn't heard any noise from the outside, he finally breathed out and let out a sob, muting it with the back of his hand.

He often felt distant from everyone else, he felt distant from Lo'ak, even though he loved his baby brother and wanted to be closer with him, just like when they were younger. But as they grew older, they grew apart.

He often felt distant from people his age, he never had many friends growing up, and when he became a teenager, his main focus became studying and his family. He wanted to make them proud and study hard to get into a good university, but sometimes he wonders if he grew up too fast. He feels that he should be more like Lo'ak sometimes, he wishes to be more like him, he wants to go out to his friends' parties, he wants to disobey his parents, he wants to be in a relationship. He just wants to feel like a normal teenager, not like a freak, at least just once.

He often felt distant from everyone, even though he was nice to his teammates, they didn't really cared about getting to know him, it didn't matter if he was a good player or not. To their eyes, Neteyam was still a freak, he wasn't a Metkayina like them, he's just an outsider, and he felt like one… Until Ao'nung got closer to him, he thought that maybe this could be the beginning of a friendship, but now he realized that Ao'nung doesn't really care about him, he was just following the coach's instructions to help him.

Neteyam didn't know that it was possible to feel even lonelier than before, but there he was, sobbing against the back of his hand trying to be as quiet as possible.

Kiri's shoulders felt instantly relieved as she put her heavy books from her backpack to her locker. She loved seeing it with her stuff and decorations, personalizing it with stickers didn't seem like something exciting but it brought her joy.

Unfortunately, that joy didn't last very long.

She heard some giggles from a distance, making her feel uneasy, and when she turned around to see the other side of the hallway, she recognized some boys from the basketball team laughing at her direction.

When she was closing her locker, she noticed that the locker's door had horrible things written all over it with permanent markers. Things like Freak or Weird bitch stood out in black ink on top of the white surface.

Her heart sinked, she felt so embarrassed, her eyes filled with tears as she noticed that everyone there was laughing at her, like they were waiting for her to see what they've done. She felt like couldn't move even though she wanted to, she was frozen.

"Look, she's crying!" someone pointed her with their finger, laughing like it was the funniest thing.

ೃ༄*ੈ✩

At the other end of the hallway, Ao'nung and Rotxo, his best friend, were walking to their lockers when they encountered this commotion, but at first they didn't know what was going on, until they noticed the short haired girl standing petrified as people laughed at her.

"What's happening?" Rotxo asked still confused, Ao'nung pointed at her locker.

"I think they wrote some shit in her locker, she's that new girl from the forest who's weird and talks to plants and shit." Rotxo looked at his friend with an incredulous look on his face. How could he talk about that poor girl like that?

It was his last straw when he saw a girl pushing Kiri and making her drop her backpack as she said "Do something bitch! don't just stand there while we're laughing at you! You're pathetic."

Ao'nung didn't even noticed when Rotxo started to walk towards the crowd and pushed the guys who started it, everyone immediately went silent.

"What is your problem bro?" Nash'vi looked at Rotxo with a frown. They both were friends and played on the basketball team, but sometimes Rotxo couldn't stand him, they were so different, Rotxo wasn't a bully to begin with.

"What do you think you're doing?! do you think it's funny bullying the new girl?" Seeing him being angry actually left them speechless, his friends were so used to him being nice and calmed that this facet of him was shocking.

"Bro we're just joking, rela-"

"Do you think this is fucking funny?" Nobody answered, they just looked down. Kiri finally reacted and left the scene, wiping the tears in her face. Rotxo looked at her, worried as she got farther and farther. He turned around to face Nash'vi "You better clean this up before she sees it again, are we clear?"

Now, Rotxo got out of there too, leaving his friends speechless behind him, but he couldn't care less, right know he just tried to follow Kiri's path.

When he thought he lost sight of her, he found her sitting on the grass with her back against the concrete wall of the school.

It was a heartbreaking picture, she looked like a fairy sitting there in between some flowers with her crystal necklaces while she wiped her tears with delicate hands. He just couldn't understand why would people treat her so badly, because she came from the forest? because she had different traditions? because she looked different? She didn't deserve any of that.

Rotxo decided to walk towards her to give her her backpack that was forgotten on the floor. Kiri saw him and immediately tried to get away as she saw the basketball team's uniform.

"No, no! it's me, don't worry, I just came here to hand you your backpack." He spoke with the softest voice ever, and Kiri completely forgot that she just left her backpack thrown on the floor.

"Oh, thank you, you didn't have to." she received the bag still sobbing, Rotxo sat next to her on the grass. Kiri was confused, why would he want to sit with her?

"I'm sorry that you had to go through all that… You don't deserve it" She wipes her tears, already calming down.

"It's fine, I mean, they are teenagers, I do weird things and look different from them, it's just something that is going to happen I guess" she rested her chin on her arms that were resting on her knees

It was really sad that she thought that, of course it wasn't okay to treat her like shit for entertainment. But keep talking about it wasn't what she needed, she needed a friend.

"Your necklace is really beautiful, is that an amethyst?" Kiri looked down at the purple crystal resting on her chest and looked at him with a soft smile.

"It is actually, I made the necklace myself." Rotxo looked at her surprised.

"You did? No way! you're really talented" Now Kiri looked at him with surprised eyes.

"You really think so?"

"Of course! Are you kidding?"

Her crying had already ceased and was practically forgotten. Rotxo was impressed with Kiri's talent, she made her own jewelry and also knitted some of her clothes

And Kiri felt so happy that someone was finally kind with her and wants to get to know her. She had finally made a friend.

The evening sky resembled a pink and yellow watercolor painting above Awa'atlu, there was barely any wind, just a warm breeze that carefully ran through Ao'nung's curls. He and Rotxo were resting in Ao'nung's swimming pool after swimming and playing around in the water for a while, and now that his parents weren't home they could smoke without getting caught.

Ao'nung has been trying all day to ignore the feeling of remorse after being just insufferable to Neteyam, he couldn't stop thinking about the way those sad and golden eyes turned teary because of him. He didn't wanna talk about it with Tsireya because when he asked her advice to make Neteyam like him, she said that he should start by apologizing, but not only he didn't do any of that, now he was sure that he made him cry.

He lighted the joint in his mouth and after giving it a puff he handed it to Rotxo. He wanted to talk about the Neteyam situation with him, but he didn't want to be so straightforward.

"Bro, today when the boys were laughing at that girl in the hallway, where did you go afterwards? You just kinda disappeared."

"Oh, she dropped her backpack and ran away so I picked it up and gave it to her" He smiled "But when I got there I sat down next to her, and I don't know if you know her but her name is Kiri, and she's actually so cool." Ao'nung looked at his friend not really convinced of that statement.

"Really?" Rotxo nodded. "And weren't you… Worried about what would the boys and everyone there think about you defending Kiri?" Rotxo looked at him and didn't hesitate about his answer.

"Of course not, I know somewhere in their brains they know that what they're doing is awful, and i'm not gonna stay there and just watch them torture a girl who's done nothing wrong." Ao'nung nodded, and god, he wishes he could be like his best friend and not worry about what other people thought about him.

"Yeah but still, doesn't it worry you that if you don't do what everyone else does, they would exclude you or something like that?" Rotxo thought about it for a second while his best friend looked at him, anxious to know his answer.

"It doesn't... Worry me, you know? It would worry me if they were actually good friends or good people, but I feel like I wouldn't be missing a lot if they don't talk to me or something like that." He passed the joint back to Ao'nung. "Besides, I have more friends, like you and Reya, real friends, not just classmates or teammates."

Ao'nung huffed and rubbed his face with his hands, making Rotxo giggle. "Ugh, you're right… I wish I didn't worry so much about what other people would say, like you."

"It wasn't something overnight though, but you can definitely get there."

Ao'nung hesitated for a second, but finally spoke. "Can I tell you something?" Rotxo nodded. Ao'nung told him about what happened with Neteyam from the beginning so he would have more context.

"There's one thing I don't get." Rotxo looked at him. "I don't understand why this situation affects you this much even though you two weren't friends to begin with, and knowing you, you normally wouldn't be worried about someone you don't care about."

"That's the thing!" Ao'nung said exasperated, like he was overwhelmed by his own feelings. "I think I actually care about him, you know? We might not be friends yet but I wanted to get to know him, I liked talking to him and I think he's, you know, smart, talented, caring and all that stuff." He looked down shyly and a sad smile appeared on his face. "But I think I fucked up for good now."

For a moment Rotxo just looked at him, he didn't know if he was too high or if he just heard Ao'nung basically confessing his feelings about Neteyam. "Bro I think you should put your pride aside and tell him you're sorry." Ao'nung rose his eyes from the water and looked up at Rotxo.

"It's not pride! I just think he wouldn't wanna see me for a while and I get that, I respect it" Rotxo shook his head, Ao'nung didn't get what he was trying to say.

"Okay first of all that's bullshit, you don't know for sure if he wants to see you or not, maybe he's expecting an apology from you. And second of all, I meant that you should put your pride aside and turn a blind eye to what would the team or anyone would say about you being friendly to the «forest boy»" He made quotation marks with his fingers. They were silent for a moment, Ao'nung was debating in his head about whether he should do what his best friend says or just make a safe bet and simply don't talk to Neteyam.

"Should I even try to apologize even though i'm sure he doesn't wanna see me?" Ao'nung wasn't really convinced about approaching Neteyam, but Rotxo was always right… he must be wizard or something.

"Yeah, definitely, that way he'll know that you feel sorry." Ao'nung sighed.

"I'll think about it."

Today it was one of those days that Neytiri got home earlier from work, so she and Jake decided to cook something special for dinner; a traditional Omaticaya recipe, everyone loved it, and even more now that they were far from their home and often felt homesick.

Neytiri was setting the table while Jake finished cooking. Lo'ak and Kiri were playing video games together and Tuk was drawing animals on her beloved sketchbook.

"Lo'ak, tell Neteyam that dinner is ready." Neytiri asked her son, who didn't took his eyes off of the TV.

"Neteyam! Dinner!" He yelled, he was too focused on not letting Kiri win again. And Neytiri looked at him with her hands on her hips

"Lo'ak I'm gonna turn the TV off if you don't go upstairs and tell your brother to come here." She warned.

"But mom! Why can't just Kiri go?" He said frustrated as he was about to lose again on the game.

"Lo'ak te Suli Tsyeyk'itan, I'm not gonna ask you again!" As soon as she finished that sentence, the flat screen showed Kiri as the winner once again. She celebrated and laughed as her brother got up from the couch.

"Fine, I'll go"

Lo'ak was pissed off by his defeat, but this time he only lost because his mom distracted him! The next time he would beat Kiri, he was sure.

His thoughts were interrupted when he got close to Neteyam's bedroom and heard something like... Sobs? His brother was crying?

The door was half way open, so he got closer and took a look inside. The room was almost completely dark if it wasn't for the dying daylight getting in from the window, Neteyam was laying on his side on top of his bed, facing the window and almost in complete silence if it wasn't for his sobs, which he tried to quiet down

This concerned Lo'ak immediately, catching Neteyam crying was as unusual as winning the lottery, so he thought that maybe his brother was hurting or something like that, there wasn't another explanation that made sense to him. So he decided to enter his brother's room and turn on the lights, making Neteyam jump due to the sudden invasion of his space.

"Bro are you alright?!" He sat on his brother's bed and shook his shoulder, while Neteyam tried to sat up and used his hand to cover his eyes from the bright light. "Are you hurt?! What's wrong?"

"Eywa I'm fine!" He pushed his brother's hands and wiped his tears. "You scared the shit out of me! You have to knock the door first you psycho! I could've been naked!"

"Are you sure you're okay?" Lo'ak was still worried. "I heard you crying." He looked at Neteyam, who kept wiping and wiping tears that were rolling down his face by themselves.

"Yes! I'm fine, just leave me alone." And there it is, his voice broke mid sentence and now he was crying again, but he still looked to the side so Lo'ak couldn't see him, but it was too late.

Just like his brother, Lo'ak had a strong feeling of protection, especially for his family, so he wouldn't leave his brother alone.

"'Teyam, you know you can trust me." He positioned his hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him but making him cry even more. "Please, tell me what's wrong."

"It's nothing serious, really." Neteyam sniffed and then wiped his nose. "it's just..."

"Yes?" Lo'ak was so intrigued to know what could've made his brother cry. Neteyam hesitated for a moment, debating whether he would tell his brother or not.

"I wanted to thank Ao'nung for helping me on the nursery yesterday… But when I was talking to him, he said awful things." Saying his name was just enough to irritate Lo'ak. "He treated me like a weirdo… Just like everyone else."

"That motherfucker…"

"And when he was talking to me, I heard the boys from the team laughing, they were laughing at the things he said... I felt humiliated and- and also I felt kind of betrayed, you know?" He laughed sarcastically. "I thought that Ao'nung was... different, but I guess was wrong."

It was hard to see his big brother like this, with his face dampened by his own tears and his head down, trying to hide. It was nothing like how he usually was, he seemed unbreakable, like nothing could ever get to him, he was the one that would comfort everyone because he didn't need anyone to comfort him. But maybe Lo'ak was wrong, after all, Neteyam was a person too.

"See? Just because he was nice one time, it didn't mean he's actually nice." He quoted what he said when Neteyam told him about how nice Ao'nung treated him. "And don't even expect him to apologize, I bet he can't even feel remorse or compassion."

Neteyam knew that he shouldn't expect anything from Ao'nung, but deep inside he wanted an apology, he needed one just so he'll know that the Metkayina didn't meant what he said.

But It was a stupid idea honestly, he should start to just forget about it.

[dr1ggles]

For anyone who's looking for good, well written saiouma stories ;)

Finished Long Fics:

Second Chances - Post Game fic where the game was virtual reality and everyone lives. Shuichi goes back to his apartment only to realize he had a roommate pre-game; Kokichi. VERY good highly recommend, it seems very boring at first but it's fucking HILARIOUS and very much slow burn. 10/10

Therefore you and me (as a result of living, as a result of dying): HONESTLY MY FAVORITE FIC EVER. it is post-game and everyone lives but throw in all their trauma (ACTUALLY realistically) and that Team Danganronpa is forcing them into their rehabilitate facility and absolute major angst and voila. the energy this fic gives me is to DIE for but im a slut for angst. emotionally damaging, indeed. 100/10

our deal: in-game fic where when kokichi stops shuichi in the virtual world in chapter 4 when he asks him to partner up, except shuichi says YES. this entire fic gives me anxiety and also makes me kick me feet like im delulu. character study + introspection are by far my FAVORITE ao3 tags. 12/10

Reaching: in-game alternate universe fic where kokichi, the mc, is stuck in a loop. whenever he dies, he wakes back up in the locker. OMG THIS ENTIRE THING IS SO GOOD. there's a twist with shuichi that you will NOT see coming. out of pure encouragement i will not say anything more abt this fic. 600/10

Deceit - The Phantom Thief: predictably, a phantom thief AU where shuichi, a detective, takes on the impossible case of the notorious phantom thief! i've read a lot of phantom thief stuff, but this one has a very solid plot line and HORRIBLY slow romance. like, the world seemed like it was going to end before they confessed. literally. 25/10

Sending Postcards from a Plane Crash: another slow burn fic bc im a whore for internal torture. basically the v3 cast survives a plane crash and are isolated on an island. they need to find a way off, but there are some strange irregularities on the island. like polar bears! (it's a tropical island.) everyone is characterized pretty well, but kokichi isnt villainized for the most part, which i like a lot. 10/10

I Reach Out My Hand, Yet He Doesn't Take It: OH. MY. GOD. if i said the other ones were emotionally damaging, this fic takes it to the NEXT FUCKING LEVEL AHAHA. this.... hurts :') but in a good way i think. another post-game fic where everyone survives except this time danganronpa wasn't a game show and the other two games plots were actually happening. it's SO GOOOOOD. and sad. pls read it.

Porcelain Parasite: i havent actually finished this one, but it's a royal AU where shuichi basically gets sold by his parents to kokichi's parents, who are like royal people. and kokichi is kinda weird bc i think he gets cursed by junko. not sure ahaha. ITS GOOD THO. some of the parts scared the heebie jeebies outta me. had me scared for their lives actually. if you like stuff like this its the only fic of its saiouma kind that's written well 👍

Temptations: VERYYYY smut heavy, so if you're not into that i don't recommend this. but if you are.... this is where you belong, brothers. it's in-game and kind of enemies to lovers at the beginning, but shuichi doesnt take very long to move past "hating" kokichi LMAO. very angsty.... and sad. my heart breaks consistently while reading this </3 definitely and owie fic but still very very good. 58388583/10

lies (and how to unravel them): TW for eating disorders throughout the entire fic- like it's the main focus. it was kind of hard to read for me bc it was so well described. shuichi is the one struggling with an ED, and while saiouma is a part of the fic, its main point is his struggles rather than him and kokichi. 10/10 but if you're sensitive to that kinda jazz, i dont recommend this

Sexy Singles in Your Area: the entire first three chapters of this fic is just entirely second hand embarrassment. im talking the worst second hand embarrassment of my LIFE out of all the shows ive seen and books ive read. its so bad fhejgj. it's a very funny and cute fic but also shuichi is DUMB. dumb dumb dense and dumb. also, it has a bunch of angst. cute but angsty. i would say its relatively light however. kokichi is characterized very well, which makes it even better <3 10/10

Everyone's Killing Reality: it's everything you want and more. in-game saiouma where the author changed a bunch of things from the danganronpa game that fucking SUCKED ASS. this is so good bc it satisfies my poor saiouma heart while also making the plot simultaneously stronger. this fic is canon idc what anyone says. 1000000/10

Coastline Massacre: solider au that gave me a bajillion heart attacks while reading it. THIS MADE ME CRY. A LOT. just thinking abt it is making me sad holy shit. 40/10 but oh my GOD beware of the goddamn PAIN you will feel while reading this.

Stay With Me: omg a fic without angst?!?! and a lot of smut. if it isnt angsty its sex. real tears. very fluffy and smut heavy (and its GOOD). 15/10

Dawn Again on this Vibrant and Violent Night: literally just finished this read. OH. MY. GODDDD. i know im obsessing over everything else on this list but by far this is the best one. so fr rn!! the way this person writes is ASTONISHING. the plot had me on the edge of my seat the whole time, plot twist after twist, i SCREAMED at a few of them. its very much plot heavy and focuses on kokichi and shuichi, and it's also ingame. kokichi is characterized to PERFECTION, and im very picky abt how other people write kokichi. i was on the verge of tears throughout the second half of this not bc it was sad, but bc how well the tension was written and laid out. GEHAHFJD IM. I LOVE THIS FIC. MY WHOLE HEART <33 199293848757585885/10

Finished Short Fics:

i consider "short" to be from 10,000 words to 70,000 words. so 😍

you've got the right to remain right here with me: phantom thief au where kokichi is looking for a new roommate to live with (cuz his dumbass got evicted). but kaede hooks him up with shuichi, the detective who is actively chasing his case. so now kokichi is living with him and somehow avoid getting caught <3 all my heart, angsty and fluffy, SO ADORABLE OMG. pls read its worth it

arisama, arisama: in-game alternate plot where instead of the time limit as the motive, it's the despair disease. kokichi has the gullible disease and i find it fucking hilarious. kinda bittersweet ending but its still cute— i would say light angst.

Where the Music Meets the Ocean: again i think this is light angst but some may disagree— alternate universe outside of the killing game where kokichi finds out that shuichi is some sort of mermaid thing- IDK it was never specified exactly what he was. but yeah its very cute and kokichi is a bit of a reckless dummy

Searching for Redemption: in-game universe where no one actually dies for the sack of saiouma and nothing else, there's no real plot logic, but not in a bad way. it starts out smut heavy but gets kinda angsty/fluffy, so i highly recommend it lol. also by one of my favorite ao3 authors 😍

Unextinguished Embers: ok im very much used to plot twists and what not, but the plot twist in this made me SCREEEEEAM. genuine shock. this is a fantasy AU where The Tragedy was about Junko being a sorcerer and basically giving sorcerers a bad name bc she was evil. they were all eradicated except.... one (its kokichi spoiler). shuichi meets him and OOPS you'll have to read it yourself ;P ITS SO GOOD PLS

Pirates of the Caribbean: Vault of the Pirate Lords: if you like pirates and Johnny Depp then you will def like this. it's kinda based off the movies but not really, it has a different plot line. shuichi is the governor's kid and kokichi is a pirate- kokichi kidnaps shuichi but for some dumbass reason he's enthusiastic abt it???? like why are you excited to be kidnapped. weirdo!

Unfinished Fics:

now i don't normally read unfinished stuff but im running out of content 😭😭 send help

fool me twice: alternate universe au where shuichi's ex from high school is kokichi, and now they're both 22 and working at the same place and shuichi is STILL a bitch abt him and kokichi's history. unfinished but so far it's pretty damn good. kokichi and shuichi are so perfectly characterized it's maddening

that's all for now but PLEASE if you have something not on this list that i can read TELL ME. i've read every finished long-fic on ao3 and even wattpad at this point. begging so hard

[n0sewise]

@murderkitten666 thanks for the tag!

20 Questions for Fic Writers

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Four so far!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

119,726

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Hunter x Hunter. It's not my first fandom, but it's the first one that i've liked enough to write fic for.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

I don't have 5 fics yet, but my most kudos'd one by far is "No, I Don't Accept Your Stupid Rose"

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I always try to respond, but I tend to do it all at once when I'm logged in to update, so it can take awhile. I'm not reading as much fic as I used to, so chatting in the comments and on tumblr is sometimes the only way I engage in fandom, and I appreciate the interaction that much more.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I guess "oh well, whatever, never mind" is the closest to an angsty ending? I still think it's happy, but I left it open ended.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

NIDAYSR is definitely the happiest. I even gave them an epilogue.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I can finally say yes! There's just the one so far, so idk if I can say what kind it is? I'm into pining though, so any smut that I write will probably be the result of super pent up longing and frustration, since that's what I'm the most interested in.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

They're not really for me.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet, but I'm not against the idea.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Killugon. Damen/Laurent from Captive Prince is in current second place since I find them just as heartbreaking and beautiful. Honourable mentions: Leopika, Chilshi, Laishuro (he's my fellow autistic king)

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh god. I had a near-crack Office AU with Gon and Killua as useless interns that I loved dearly, but the plot was going nowhere and it wasn't good enough to post. RIP parkour parkour

16. What are your writing strengths?

I would love to say humour, but I think it's writing cringe. I've been told multiple times that I've induced terrible secondhand embarrassment on behalf of the characters (usually Gon), so I think this is my gift/curse.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action for sure. I still have a hard time working out how to drop info so readers know what's happening.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Whenever I've come across it in fics or books it's cool, and I like when authors add extra info and context in the notes. I only speak one language, so I'd need help if I ever wanted to try it for myself.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Hunter x Hunter!

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Ok, so I think my *best* fic is "love me dead," but my favourite fic is "oh well, whatever, never mind" because I think my writing improved the most while working on that one, and for all the 90s nostalgia I got to pack into it.

I think I'm a little too late to tag anyone in this, but feel free if you're interested! I'm nosy <3

[thoughtfullyrainynightmare]

4, 5,12, 17 and 25 for Nozel?

More Braidboy!

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

Probably to one of Jane Austen's works. Yes, he has... less than redeeming qualities, but he does have a good heart deep down. He's a misguided man, who, should he find himself a partner, would need to be strong willed. And I think that he'd fit into Jane Austen's works. I'm thinking about the most famous one of them, Pride and Prejudice, but perhaps someone who's more familiar with her works, might be able to place him into another one as well.

5. What’s the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

Okay so... I thought about making a fic based on this song with Nozel (or I planned on making it into a series)

But this made me think of him

12. What’s a headcanon you have for this character?

Oh I have so many angsty headcanons for him, but... lets try something more positive for him.

He has a sweet tooth. Particularly raspberry or cherry confection (chocolates). Catch him in his office on a Friday evening with his feet up, (if it's winter with wool socks on) with a glass of wine and a box of confectionery.

He would never spill that secret, because pride, but... he also wouldn't mind if it resulted into a spontaneous chocolate box and a wine evening....

17. What’s a ship for this character you don’t hate but it’s not your favorite that you’re fine with?

Uhh... Norothy? Dorozel? I'm not even sure what's the ship name for it, but Nozel x Dorothy. I don't mind the ship, and I don't mind writing for it, but to me they're more friends and their relationship is aching more to doctor-patient -type.

As said, I don't mind it. It's just not my favourite ship with Nozel. Personal preferences

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

He was a cold asshole for sure, but there were some scenes even early on that made me think that there was more to him than just that. There was something about how he was furious about Fue being in a coma due to the EOTMNSs that made me think that he actually did care for a friend. That it wasn't a simple matter of pride.

And as the series went on, until present day, that feeling just grew stronger. Nozel is someone who cares very, very deeply, but he struggles to show it and speak it out. However, he'd to go hell and back for his near and dear, and is someone who is... self-sacrificing. His will and need to protect others sometimes is so strong, that it'll cloud his better judgement. Though one ought to also take into account that Nozel was essentially orphaned (I am not counting Papa Silva as a parental figure. He told Noelle what a disgrace she was! Papa Silva is no father. Just a sperm donor if you ask me), at the age of 15-16 and was placed under a lot of responsibility. He did what he did in order to keep his little sister away from the frontlines and the most serious of battles. Yes, his ways were misguided to put it mildly, but he did what he thought was right at the time. And I suspect that it was a plan that he came up when he was far younger, and felt that he needed to see through with it. "In too deep" so to say.

Nozel is an incredibly complex and well crafted character.