#not even sure why bc usually its when i draw too much and it was hurting before i decided hm yeah i should definitely draw

[ganondoodle]

i have seen people talk about how hard it is to draw anything if you have aphantasia (which is good to talk about and true and valid and also intersting to read and this post isnt to devalue that, two things can coexist etc etc)

i personally struggle with the opposite; i have incredible imagination, i'd say it's my best and only "inate talent", (this is not a brag ..) all stories i think about are movies, i can stop them, change camera angle and poses, rotate ever object however i want, place lighting sound and voices, even styles, i switch from ghibli to botw to fortiches style, even into the style of a comic i recently read which wasnt even animated, the only thing that only works half the time is music-

and that all might sound fantastic, but its a mess, it goes too fast and too quickly, things never play out one way, theres interruption, involuntarily sudden changes to other subjects, i feel like struggling to keep an angry horse on one path, it makes me waste HOURS each day just reversing and redoing a scene like im a movie director wizard in my head, theres no ONE finished version, it changes everytime yet i go back over and over again to make it better, i forget most of it within a few hours anyway; even IRL when someone tells me about a memory and they are not sure if i was with them during it once they start to explain trying to make me remember it instead i will imagine it, in the end i wont be sure if i actually remembered or if i just imagined it too real, it scares me how much i forget and cant remember only for my mind to make shit up, makign me doubt my own memory (its weird how it works, i have horrible geographical memory, when i drive somwhere i have known my entire life i need to remember the path to it by imagining driving it, i remember significant things but not the path to them or how they connect or in what order, i have to go through it in my head every single time)

by far the worst part though is that extreme disconnect between whats in my mind and what i can do, just because i can imagine things like that doesnt mean i can draw it (god i WISH), nothing i have ever drawn is how it was in my head, the few things you get to see are the ones i won the fight against myself with to keep going and say 'good enough' at some point the speed is a problem too, the things playing in my head, sometimes even multiple at the same time, play like, again, a movie, whatever im trying to draw is rarely ONE thing, its a whole scene that plays over and over, i want to draw it all but it wont work bc my mind is too fast and i am too slow, it makes me try to skip ahead and get things done as fast as possible, it NEVER works (also too much, theres so many things in my head, i have almost the entirety of the totk rewrite in my head already, novels worth of lore and story for my other projects, its overwhelming how much is in there that i cannot get out and on paper)

its why comics take me so long to make, why detailed paintings are so rare, its the rare times i can force myself to try and tune out my mind and just work on what is in front of me, usually works for a few hours .. if i can manage to reach that sort of focus at all, its why basic sketches of characters are so much easier to do bc i dont have to fight as hard to just draw a character doing nothing- as soon as i want to make it a sketch page of things and scenes the movies are back and are there to haunt me until i cry and give up after hours of trying to keep up with my mind that i will never be able to catch up to (and this is only about drawing .. )

i know skill and speed increase over time, but i wont ever get to where my mind is, its always ahead and trying to skip and jump towards it only makes me stumble and fall flat on my face- maybe its ADHD, maybe its the autism, maybe its the depression, maybe its just me, maybe its just all of that

what im trying to say is, head full, too much thought, too fast, never able to translate it into viewable things in the way and speed as my head works, i explode

[guinevereslancelot]

*only has the desire to write when i don't have time for it* *only has the desire to draw when wrist/hand injury is flaring up*

[bby-blu-swirll]

sit on my lap while you do my eyeliner - bakugo x reader

i can't find it now, (i will tho if it kills me) but this is inspired by this tumblr post i saw on my pinterest that was like " 'let me do your eyeliner' gf and 'okay sit on my lap while you do it' bf" lol

pls enjoy xx

bakugo loves your makeup. (he loves your natural face just as much, but he also thinks you look drop dead gorgeous no matter what.)

his favorite days are when you pull out the eyeliner pen. when you look at him and your eyes are rimmed with black, bringing out the hue of your irises, he just folds honestly. subtly, because his pride is too strong to let anybody see him so weak for you, but you've definitely picked up on it.

he loves anything you do with it. a wing, big or small, a messy grungey outline, drawing hearts or stars, anything. he loves watching you do it with such attention to detail and even more loves seeing the finished product and how it might have changed the shape of your eyes. whether it's soft and cute and gives you little doe eyes, or sharp and cutting like a knife, pulling your eyes into dangerous (& admittedly sexy) slits, he adores it.

he doesn't show it much, though. he's not as bad as compliments as you thought he'd be, really, but this is just a bit different.

he can call you pretty, gorgeous, hot, whatever- all he wants. there was no problem there. especially, in front of other people. it was almost like bragging to him.

like once, in the middle of a conversation with the bakusquad, he caught your arm as you were walking by just to press a kiss to your cheek and tell you that you looked beautiful. of course he meant every word of it, but there was a silent emphasis on the fact that he was the one you got to tell you that, and that it was very true. it was like his way of being able to say, "suck it, extras, that beauty is my girlfriend," without sounding like the cocky douchebag he usually did. (bc he knows you don't like it when he's such a cocky douchebag <3)

but complimenting such a specific part of you was a bit more difficult, and he wasn't quite sure how to articulate it. he knew he liked it, but he wasn't sure why. he just thought you looked sexy and sweet like that.

like you did today.

it was one of those lazy saturdays for the both of you, where you slept in a little and kind of just floated through the day, maybe go out maybe not, maybe make out on your bed, who knows.

it was close to half past ten when you were finally up and at your vanity, doing your makeup for the day. your boyfriend was spread out and taking up most of your bed while he studied for the test you had on monday. you thought he was a bit of a nerd for spending one of his only mornings off on school, but you admired his dedication.

neither of you liked silence much, so soft music filled the quiet in your dorm, along with the occasional page turn from bakugo, usually followed by a sigh.

you capped your eyeliner pen with a huff. you had been looking at your face so long, it was hard to tell if it was even. "hey babe?" you turned your swivel chair to face him.

"yeah?" he didn't bother looking up from his book.

you pressed the closed pen to your cheek and blinked a few times. "does this look okay?"

he glanced up for a moment, doing a double take when he saw you. there was no concealer on your dark circles and your eyeliner was smudged underneath your eyes and your lips looked a bit cracked, and he could feel his stomach swell with butterflies the second he looked at you.

"yeah, its.. its perfect." he looked away and cleared his throat, hearing you chuckle slightly.

once you turned around in your chair, his eyes were glued to you. just watching you sort through your makeup tray, trying to find something. the way you knit your brows together, your bottom lip stuck out- his quickly averted his gaze back to his book when you turned to him. he could feel your eyes trained on him as he thumbed the corner the pages.

"hey katsuki?"

he hummed in response, still not looking at you.

you stood up and slowly sauntered towards him, smirking when his eyes flicked up to you every few seconds. you took his book and set it aside.

"the hell are you-" he clenched his jaw when you leaned close to him, still standing. he dropped his voice to a soft tone, just shy of a whisper. "what're you doing, huh?"

"can i do your eyeliner?"

he chuckled and smirked. "'course.."

you grinned and took a seat next to him, your face heating up as his hands found your waist. he lifted you up and set you on his lap, wrapping his arms around your torso and holding you close. his smirk grew as a blush crept up your cheeks.

"just as long as you sit... here." he pecked your lips, mindlessly stroking his thumb across the skin just above the waistband of your pants. "you can start whenever, babe, i'm not stopping you..."

you huffed and bit the inside of your cheek, internally rolling your eyes. his cocky smirk softened a little when your fingers delicately cradled his jaw, turning his head slightly.

"close your eyes..." you kept your voice low, watching his eyes flutter shut.

his skipped a beat when he felt your breath on his lips. he took deep breaths, just inhaling whatever lotion or perfume had you smelling so good.

you bit your lip and did your best to keep your hand steady. it was hard to keep the lines straight when he would squeeze your hips occasionally. but you prevailed nonetheless, keeping the ink close to the rim of his eyes. you were going for a sort of rodrick look.

"okay.." you clicked your tongue and capped your pen, setting it to the side. "you're done~"

he opened his eyes slowly, a playful look dancing across his features. "well? how do i look?"

your breath caught in your throat. his red eyes glowed, half lidded and staring right into you.

"hmmm..." you brought a hand to his chest, the other messing with the hair at the base of his neck. you traced small circles across his skin. "handsome."

"yeah?" he took your cheek in his hand, pulling you closer to him. "that all?"

you shrugged and chuckled a bit, watching his cocky grin return.

"hm, you think i'm hot. coulda just said so..." he pressed his lips against yours softly, which quickly changed to a rough, demanding kiss.

looks like you did end up making out on your bed,,

totally meant to upload this over a week ago,,, my bad lol i've been very busy, sorry this is so crap lol i'll probably rewrite it in the future <33

love you sm !! stay safe & sleep well 💗💗

[regretisstoredintheme]

Turtle Blush + Hand-holding

A/n: more brainrot?? More brainrot. I love making headcanons on different ways characters blush, it’s my favorite thing ok???? And the turtles are my hyperfixation at the moment… I just can’t stop thinking abt how they would hold your hand bc they’ve got 3 fingers instead of 5!!! there are complications!!!!! Also I wanted to draw blushy turtles so yeah.

— headcanons under the cut —

BLUSH!!

Most to least amount:

Raph

Donnie

Leo

Mikey

—

Raph:

How he blushes

This boy will sometimes go full face red, but most of the time it’s all in his cheeks. They go rosy red all the time and his shoulders will blush too. IK IT LOOKS LIKE I PUT SOME ON HIS PLASTRON BUT I DIDN’T REALLY MEAN TO??? 😭😭 when he blushes he absolutely can not look you in the eye, he’s mumbling, stuttering, doing calculations of how to get out of the situation, (kinda like he did when locking up Ms. cuddles) and will start to back up if you get closer. Yk his lil nervous laugh? His lil “hAhAAHH..”? That’s his go-to reaction if you say anything about his actions (which you’re bound to) or if you brush your hand on his arm.

Why he blushes

It’s pretty easy to get Raph to blush, he just feels so lucky to be with you and the surprise that you love him too doesn’t fade too fast through your relationship. In like the first 6 months he’s like this, so when you give him a kiss on the cheek he’s an absolute MESS. And Mind Raph makes sure he knows it, feeling horribly embarrassed about his stuttering. This also goes on for a while before that insecurity calms down, allowing him to feel more comfortable in his own shell.

When he’s more comfy, even then he’s easy to fluster. If you catch him staring at you, he’s already embarrassed. He’s looking away with a slight blush, avoiding you— but if your gaze is steady, still staring at him - now he’s real flustered. Laugh playfully and he just might explode.

He likes to cradle you in his arms, he’s always wanted to be a protector and you put him at peace. He feels pure serenity when you’re near, and he adores cuddles. However, when you ask him for snuggles— he’s burning up, stammering through trying to say “I’d love to” , “my pleasure” , and “yes please” at the same time. “My yes… eh— pleased to— wait- yes the please.. my love to!! Oh god..” (he’s face palming fr.) Although, when you finally get situated— with his racing heart, he’s wide awake. He isn’t going to sleep until he can stop focusing on your face snuggling into his plastron, acting as a ball of warm sunshine to drown out his sleepiness.

Spoiler Alert: he pretty much just waits for you to fall asleep first.

—

Donnie:

How he blushes

Donnie feels like the type to have a nose blush— and also I dunno why but I could see his shell blushing??? Even if only at the edges, It just seems so canon to me. His fingers go pink when he’s nervous, but those aren’t exactly a giveaway because they also freeze when he’s cold. He feels his mouth go dry when he blushes, thats how he knows he’s turning red, so he starts fiddling with the edge of his purple mask, trying to act natural while he pulls it down further over his blushing snout.

In this state, he’s really overstimulated, even the slightest chair creek would prick his nerves, so if you give him any attempt at physical contact he’s either short circuiting or smacking you away, unable to process the feeling. (It’s mostly the latter) ESPECIALLY IF ITS A NOSE KISS!!! He usually melts into your hands, but if he’s overstimmed, he will not hesitate to ATTACC.

He apologizes after, embarrassed that he bat you away.

Why he blushes

Easy, you outsmarted him. He’ll be throwing on his emotionally unavailable bad boy image, strutting his stuff, bantering with you — and then you will throw in a flirty comment that makes him have to just process for a minute. Usually he can bounce back, but if it’s something reaally flirty, then he’s just like 😀 … FOR LIKE 5 MINUTES HFJDHDJEB GIVE HIM A SECOND HE’LL FIND A COMEBACK

After he does so, he gives a small smirk, kinda proud that you were able to stun THE Donatello, smartest, bravest, most courageous turtle of all time— if only momentarily. “You won for once..” he marvels, “huh— I’m impressed.”

Also you doing something really cute, like doing an equation wrong but looking at him with absolute glee at getting through it— waiting for his approval. he is LOSING. HIS. M I N D. He’s trying not to squeal because “LOOK AT MY PARTNER. LOOK. LOOK LOOK LOOK LOOK AAAAAA OH MY GOD” but the last thing he wants to do is flaunt the way Leo of all people does— he’s more civil than that. (Imagine how a badass villain shows off their partner.) if anyone says anything about “pff what an idiot” when you’re doing something he thinks is absolutely adorable— he is pulling out his disposal unit immediately. He considers it the highest offense when someone insults his intelligence, so the same goes for his partner.

—

Leo:

How he blushes

Leo doesn’t really blush in his face, no— the red marks on his face will occasionally glow with heat, but the real place he blushes is his neck. It goes beet red and he’s trying to cover it up because he’s embarrassed. Not only does he blush, but his hands get real clammy, and he’s constantly trying to pretend they’re not. He WILL avoid holding your hand if you’ve made him flustered. if you’re insistent on it, he’s wiping his hands on a shirt he’s wearing or tries to play it off that he was exercising.

Why he blushes

It is really hard to fluster THE Neon Leon. He may melt into your warm hands or blush a little when you’re being cute— he’s definitely capable of being soft, HOWEVER!!! As someone who is so bent on keeping up a carefree persona, it would take a lot to get under his skin. Mikey says so himself in the Lair Games, “nothing gets to Leo.”

He panics when a one-liner doesn’t work. He’ll make a few more with complete confidence, but If you don’t like his flirting, he’s shifting on his feet, rubbing his neck, and slowly backing himself up into a corner. He has a similar reaction when you catch him in a lie, he panics— but he brushes it off with somewhat ease. You’d have to try really hard to get him flustered. Such as, well— He likes the little things about people, because he likes to figure people out, and he’s got a soft spot for you, so say… a blue flower in your hair, formal wear, having that edge of confidence, staying in close proximity while holding onto his arm and gently sprinkling in praise to the conversation…

His brain is frying, slowly but surely!! Be prepared for a jumpy and stuttering Leo.

—

Mikey:

How he blushes

Contrary to popular belief, I don’t think Mikey would visibly blush. Sure he gets that lil buzz in his cheeks and they feel warm when he’s flattered— but they don’t go red. Out of all his brothers, since he’s the smallest, I feel like he’s the most cold-blooded. and due to this, he doesn’t have much blood rush to his face, and he’s got the COLDEST FUCKING HANDS YOU EVER DID SEE. How those hands threw a skyscraper we will never know— but they are only warm when he’s cooking something bc of the heat from the oven.

(SIDE NOTE— HE NEVER??? BURNS HIMSELF??? Doesn’t matter if he scrapes the side of the hot ass cookie sheet he’ll just go “ow?” Check it, and be like “we’re good :)” DRAXUM MADE THEM FOR WAR AND HE’S OVER HERE LIKE “hehe I almost burned myself oopsie”)

Why he blushes:

I’m sorry sweetie, but you can’t fluster Mikey. The most you will get is flattery, and he feigns shyness because he’s a lil shit. He will unabashedly laugh and giggle when you do something cute and is the most clingy lil shit to ever exist. He will rant about all the reasons he loves you for hours, just because he can’t hold in the excitement. If you get embarrassed by it, that’s just a bonus for him!! He’s cooing over you and hugging you tight, swaying back and forth gently.

You’re beginning to wonder if he can feel embarrassment at all— you’ve tried everything. He’s just happy to be with you no matter what, and you are the only thing that could make him sit still for more than 5 minutes. So no, sorry, Mikey doesn’t get flustered ♡

The only way he would actually get flustered is if you lied about something to make him look stupid. Then he’s tearing up, betrayal in his eyes as he tries to explain in a panic. But you would never do that to him, right? .. right?

—

Hand holding!!

Coldest to warmest hands:

Mikey

Leo

Donnie

Raph

—

Raphie:

Idc how big you think your hands are, Raph’s hands ENGULF yours. If you hold onto just one finger he will probably combust on the spot. He just thinks it’s so sweet!! Will probably baby you if you do that. His hands are a gentle lukewarm, but don’t seem to drop colder. It’s really nice during the summer months since neither of you have to worry about being all hot and sweaty. He squeezes your hand when he’s nervous, if you pet his knuckles he will melt into your grasp once more. IF YOUVE GOT FRECKLES/BIRTHMARKS ON YOUR HANDS, HE WILL KISS THEM!!!! THAT IS A THREAT!!!! He does it because he thinks they’re pretty— If you get all blushy then he’s backing up, a familiar rose dusting his cheeks. He didn’t realize it was a big deal, he was just appreciating them!!

He holds your hand often, it lets him know you’re safe and that he doesn’t have to worry as much. As someone with horrible object permanence, holding your hand is a great way for him to know where you are— especially since he feels ‘too big’ and doesn’t want to bump into you. He worries about his spikes, so when he knows you’re right by his side, he can relax a little. If you’re in a crowd, he does the mom thing where he holds your hand so you don’t get lost— losing sight of you kicks off his fear of being alone, so there is no way he is letting you get lost in the crowd.

—

Dondon:

Donnie isn’t a fan of hand holding. He’ll take a hug and will hold you in his lap but he doesn’t usually find himself with his hand in yours. It’s quite overstimulating at times, so when he does, it’s mostly because he’s trying to guide you somewhere or apologize for something. He gently grasps your wrist, his thumb sometimes rubbing in small circles.

Most of the reason he doesn’t hold your hand dead-on is because of the temperature difference. If your hands are warm he doesn’t like the sweat and if your hands are cold— well he’s cold blooded of course he wouldn’t like it 😭😭 Your wrist is the perfect temp in his opinion, and nothing will stop him from taking advantage of that. (ESPECIALLY IF YOUR LOVE LANGUAGE IS PHYSICAL TOUCH!!! He does it to tell you he loves you, even if he can’t say it aloud.) he rarely holds your hand unprompted, unless he did something stupid or was hyperfixating for so long that you got bored and left his lab. When you leave he can tell, getting upset that he can’t feel your presence anymore. “Dove?” He’ll turn in his chair, trudging out of his room at realizing you disappeared. He grabs your wrist gently, his head on your shoulder as he sulks— silently begging you to return.

—

Mikester:

It doesn’t matter how he does it, he’s intertwining his fingers with yours. He doesn’t care if it feels uncomfortable, but if you do, he just gently cups your hand with his. Randomly when holding your hand he’ll pulse his grip in little patterns— sometimes it’s to the song in his head, other times it’s just on the fly. If you copy his rhythm, you’ll quickly find yourself in a memory game where you have to match the beat— the terrapin slowly making it harder to remember. Every time you pass a ‘level’, he gives you a quick peck on the cheek!

He loves to hold your hand, no matter how cold yours are, his is always colder— so he adores the warmth!! If you complain about his cold hands, he’s giving a mischievous smirk, and suddenly you find yourself constantly defending from his devilish torment. You can’t escape him now, every time you go up to him for a hug or snuggle, his cold hands sneak up to your neck, freezing you instantly. He laughs like a little boy with his first balloon every time it happens, apologizing sweetly before going to freeze you again. HE HAS A KILLER DEATH GRIP, DON’T TELL ME HE DOESN‘T. If you try to let go of his hand he grabs it back and looks at you with an evil cheeky smile, whatever you had to do with that hand you’ll just have to do while he’s holding it.

—

Leoser:

May or may not have gotten some inspiration from @pianocat939 BUT ANYWAYSSSS

Leo likes to pet your knuckles when he holds your hand, as well as give it a chaste kiss whenever he feels like it. He definitely does the prince thing where he gets on one knee, it makes him feel so gentlemanly and if you laugh that is a huge bonus. He is more of a hug-person, wanting to be close to you at all times, but he will hold your hand a lot more often if you don’t like PDA. HE DEFINITELY SWINGS HIS ARMS WHILE YOU HOLD HANDS DON’T TELL ME HE DOESN’T.

He splits your four fingers in half when he holds your hand, mostly so it’s more comfortable for the both of you. He whines if you let go of his hand, even if it’s something small like an itch on your face. He pretends his hand is floating away when you let it go, chuckling if you panic and grab it back/being dramatic and holding a ‘funeral’ for his hand if you let it ‘die’. His hands get calloused from holding his sword all day, but he does manicure them, so texture depends whether he’s done them recently. He thinks your hands are the softest thing ever, and constantly asks for your ‘routine.’ HE WILL PAINT YOUR NAILS!!! refuses to paint them anything but shades of blue, saying you’ll have to find someone else if you want to betray him anything different.

—

A/N: THIS . THIS IS THE REASON I HAVE BEEN SO HELD BACK WITH REQUESTS. THIS MF!!!!!! >:((((

Nah I’m just playing I loved writing it and I promise I’ll get back on track now ♡

—

[pinknightsinmymind]

if you feel like it, could you write more headcanons about ellie? not full fic or one shot, but thoughts about her. like, the types of kisses she gives you or the kind of girlfriend she is

【 ellie williams as a gf hc's 】

a/n: yes yes yes yes 100% i think about ellie way too much for my own good and it rots my brain. since i wrote so much it'll be below the cut lol

she loves to see you in her clothes in fact she even encourages it its just something about it that drives her crazy

she's protective of you and always wants to take care of you and make sure you don't do any of the dangerous or stupid shit she does

i feel like ppl forget how much of a dork she is; she'd tell you all about space and the different facts she's learned, she'd explain the plots of her favorite comics, who the characters are, which ones are her favorites, why she thinks one arc was better than the other, and so on and so forth

i think she loves to chat your ear off about any and everything

she's probably afraid she's annoying, so sometimes you might need to reassure her a little bit

in a modern au she's the type to send you funny memes or videos she finds, probably browses tiktok and twitter a lot

definitely the type to send you a photo of two animals being cute or cuddling together and say "us" because she's just a sap like that

composes songs about you and acts all shy when she shows them to you

DRAWS YOU

you're one of her favorite subjects to draw, and she loves showing you every new piece of you she has

she'd send you song recs ALL the time

listens to lots of indie and shoegaze

pls pls pls for the love of god ask her to teach you how to play guitar bc she'd be so excited to show you and spend the time with you

i think her love languages are quality time, physical touch, and words of affirmation

forgets NOTHING

you know how dads do that thing where you tell them you liked something once and they never forget it? yeah she got that from joel it rubbed off on her

remembers what you wore on your first date, remembers your food orders, memorizes your favorite colors, bands, tv shows, movies, everything

so so caring and sweet

since one of her love languages are physical touch you can expect lots of affection from her

loves cuddling, holding your hand, having her arms around you, she just has to be touching you somehow

flirts a lot (but its not a bad thing) even after you two have started dating

loves kissing you all the time, and will make excuses for it

she needs her good morning kiss, her good night kiss, good luck kisses, goodbye kisses (even if she's only gonna be gone a few hours💀), one bc she missed you, a hello kiss, she will use ANY excuse just to kiss you

but sometimes she won't even bother creating one she'll ask to kiss you just bc

loves having sleep overs and nights in together where you can just cuddle and watch movies or play video games bc she's a huge introvert

the type who will do anything to make sure your comfort isn't disturbed

if you don't like the other side of the bed she switches with you, will let you sit in the last chair at an event (but not before asking if you'd just rather sit in her lap), helps guide you through anything making you scared or anxious

calls you pet names every five minutes. all of them.

love, babe, baby, babygirl, princess, darling, honey, whatever is your favorite she calls you the most

lives to spoil you; pays the bill, buys you gifts, drowns you in affection, you name it

celebrates your birthday like its a holiday

speaking of can you imagine her during the holiday season???

the two of you plan out a couple costume for halloween

the two of you are so cute together it's gross

you're always welcome to spend thanksgiving with her and joel

and christmas?? she gets even more sentimental than usual, and buys you an extremely meaningful gift

the most supporitve, soft, kind, humorous, and sweet gf imaginable just a dream come true

she feels like you really balance her out, and isn't afraid to tell you how much you mean to her or how much she loves you

she makes sure you feel loved and remember that you are loved

can't wait to move in with you and once you two do she feels like she's in heaven everyday

just loves you and cherishes you deeply

overall just THE gf you dream and pray for ugh this girl gets me in my feelings every time she's just so cute and sweet😭😭😭😭

[sweetlittlenamjoon]

✨how stray kids would react to finding out about your regression✨

SFW interaction only please!!!

Chan 🐺🎧

finds out by accident

he’s just checking in on everyone and when he knocks on your door he gets no response

he gets worried and decides to just peek his head in

you’re sleeping with your paci hanging loosely out of you mouth

he thinks it’s really cute and doesn’t really question it much

he asks about it later in private

he immediately does so much research

wants to be your cg right away

dad cg vibes

likes to carry you around

just everywhere

he just goes about his day with you on his hip

“big hugs? big hugs.”

calls you baby girl/boy or kiddo

does voices for your stuffies :)

Lee Know  🐰🐱

finds out by walking in on you with a paci

just goes 😳, apologizes, and leaves

you explain later and he’s like “oh thank god I thought I walked in on something private”

he’s totally fine with it and even hangs out with you sometimes

its takes him and minute to get comfy actually taking care of you when regressed

makes you snacks

“eat up so you have lots of energy later!”

likes to have you in his lap so he can pet your head

picks the ugliest outfits for you he can bc he thinks its funny

plays pretend but he has to be the queen

or the bad guy

“oh noooo. i’ve been defeated.” *flop*

super protective???

if any of the other boys are playing too rough he’ll just scoop you up and threaten them with tissue mouth

Changbin  🐷🐰

why do i feel like binnie would just sixth sense that you’re a regressor

like you tell him about and he’s like “oh, was i not supposed to know?”

supportive big bro/cool older cousin vibes

he loves to pick you up and just hold you

bench press the baby

does that airplane thing where they pick you up with their feet

does his cutesy voice when talking to you

“who’s binnie’s little angel?”

lets you do his hair and makeup

drags whoever he can to co-care

mostly so you can both annoy whoever’s closest

talent shows!!!

he WILL tickle you

no escape

lots of stimmy dances and noises back and forth

adventures to the park

he will underdog you on the swings he don’t care about the rules 😎

Hyunjin  🦙🌲

finds out bc you come to cuddle him one night while regressed

you’re all babbly and squirmy and he’s like “well maybe they’re just sleepy???”

but you just smile up at him and go “hyunjinnie, I wuv you.”

and he just gives you a big hug and goes “I’m not sure what's goin’ on but love you too.”

in the morning you apologize and explain everything

he’s honestly a little confused but he’s trying his best

real awkward but he’s like that with actual kids so

he warms up quick tho

just says random noises

vocal stimmies back and forth

colouring!!!

draws you little pictures to colour in

cuts up fruit for you :)

definitely a co-care kinda guy

usually with felix or changbin

Han  🐹🍓

finds out bc chan convinced you he’d really love to help out

as expected he’s so excited

“so i can just baby you and carry you around and play pretend and it wont be weird?!”

big bro/babysitter cg

you will be watching animal documentaries sorry

he says its bc theyre educational

loves when you’re extra small so he can peekaboo with you

does silly voices when reading to you

chase!

lee know has to remind him to not get too into it or somebody will get hurt lol

really helpful with impure regression

breathing techniques

“wanna put on a silly cat video for a distraction, sweetheart?”

makes sure your toys get snacks too

Felix  🐣☀️

finds out bc you confide in him early on

he’s the first person you actually tell about your regression

super duper supportive

for a while you sneak into his room whenever you feel yourself start to regress

you watch anime on his phone and cuddle

he keeps a paci in his bedside table and an extra stuffie on his bed for you

once you’ve told everyone else he’s so proud

bakes for you all the time

you get to measure the chocolate chips and lick the spoon >:)

bath time!

he lights candles and gives you lots of bubbles

comfy naps and snuggles

pillow forts!

no hyungs allowed!!!

ok i guess lee know can come in he has snacks

does his high pitched voice bc it makes you laugh :)

Seungmin  🐶🐾

finds out bc you involuntarily regress in front of him and try very hard to explain while baby brained

very confused bc you’re mumbling a lot

he just gets ‘i’m a babey sometime an is ok because i copin’

good enough of a reason as any

so he just asks what you want him to do and follows along

vibin

he gets a better explanation later

still vibin

likes to chill best when you’re toddler-middle regressed

he doesn’t know what to do with nonverbal cues lol

thank god for AAC

would do pretty much anything for you

the others pick on him for being so nice to you when regressed when he’s usually such a brat

calls you the maknae

I.N. complains but he doesn’t mind when you’re little

he WILL just tackle you out of nowhere tho

I.N. 🦊🌸

finds out by accident

finds a rattle and some other toys while tidying your room

brings your rattle out to you in the living room and is like “do you have a niece or nephew???”

you get flustered but decide to just tell him the truth

and he just goes “oh ok!” and goes back to cleaning

doesn’t help out much at first

helps with getting you snacks and blankets

sits next to you while doing his own thing

but one day he just pulls you into his lap and continues his game

once he warms up he loves to bug the other members with you

rascals, the lot of you

pretty much never uses his baby voice unless you do something REALLY cute

loves to brush you hair

forehead kisses like “mwah!”

puts you in his big shoes

he takes so many pics

and shows every member

chill with you braggy with all the boys

(requests are open! send me an ask https://at.tumblr.com/sweetlittlenamjoon/i-dont-know-if-you-guys-are-actually-aware-of-this/6t8739ocrw7r)

[svltzmans]

for worse or for better - h.m.

a/n: good morning! another banger request from ??? anon lets all thank them for their contributions to my blog 😭 this is the last fic in my request box so if any of y'all have something in mind you want me to write now is the perfect time to send it in <3

warnings: kinda angsty??? but then fluffy so its fine <3, mentions of periods, unnecessary cursing bc i am a sailor

y/n knew when she woke up that her day wasn't going to go well.

the squeezing pains in her abdomen had already started, and she wasn't having it. not even a little.

messily making her bed and getting dressed, she realizes that even the most mundane of tasks are stressing her out.

much to her dismay, she still had to go to class. and wickery practice, and to study group, and...

ugh.

more than anything else, y/n just wants to stay in bed. maybe shed a few tears and order a pizza. but that is a complete pipe dream.

"y/n! hi!"

it's lizzie, and she's in an annoyingly good mood.

"hey," y/n manages, her mood shining through in her tone.

lizzie feigns a frown. "someone didn't sleep well, huh?"

"i slept fucking fine, if you must know," y/n sneered, becoming irritated by lizzie's ever present charm.

"jeez, y/n. i'm gonna walk away now."

and she does, and y/n immediately feels bad. she knows she's pretty irritable on her period, but she thought she'd be able to control it.

but as it turns out, she's not in as much control as she thought.

y/n takes her usual seat in potions class, usually right next to her girlfriend, hope.

except hope's not there when class starts, and y/n is irritated. the one person that makes her feel better decided not to show up.

she sighs, resting her chin in her arms. she knew class would feel extra long without hope next to her, cracking jokes and sharing the doodles she draws instead of focusing and taking notes.

an hour finally goes by after what feels like three, and y/n is exhausted. she knows she has to go to wickery practice or face the wrath of penelope park.

does she care about that? not much, but she forces herself to change into a t-shirt and gym shorts and make her way to the field. she's sure hope will come eventually, considering that wickery is much more fun than potions class.

the team has already started practicing when y/n arrives, and she decides to just jump in.

making a few decent passes, she thinks her day might just be turning around. still with no sight of hope, y/n's disappointment grows in the pit of her stomach.

she forgets about her misfortune momentarily when she spots lizzie, preparing for the next play. she makes her way over, feeling unnerved that the blonde is still angry about earlier.

"lizzi-"

"y/n, don't apologize. i have a period too."

"how did you...?"

"i just know. that's the only time you ever act like that. well, that and when you haven't had caffeine in a couple of days."

"you know me a little too well. now, give me the ball."

toward the end of practice, y/n sits down on the bench, sipping some water. she scans the field for hope, thinking she might have missed her, but she's nowhere to be found.

it's not exactly unlike hope to miss class, and maybe even an occasional wickery practice, but y/n is getting frustrated. she hasn't seen her girlfriend all day, and hope hadn't made any effort to see her.

as if her thoughts could be read, hope plops down next to her, in her wickery uniform.

"what'd i miss?," she asks, placing a gentle kiss on y/n's cheek as she settles.

"uh, well, where do i start? potions, almost all of wickery practice... where have you been all day?"

"dr. saltzman needed me, we had to go-"

"well why didn't you tell me, hope? i've been worried about you. you can't just disappear all day. you didn't even put in any effort to let me know that i wouldn't see you at all today."

with that, y/n stands and starts walking away. she knows she needs to be alone before she starts saying worse things she doesn't mean.

hope is left completely blindsided by y/n's reaction to her presence. y/n never gets frustrated in that way, especially not with her. she figures something must be bothering her, and without much consideration at all, she comes to a conclusion.

after coming down from her anger high, y/n is consumed with guilt from the way she treated both hope and lizzie. she at least had attempted to apologize to lizzie, even though lizzie had practically done all the work for her.

she decided that she couldn't face hope, not like this. she is almost ashamed of the way her eyes are puffy from the tears that had streamed (and are still slightly streaming) down her flushed face.

just as y/n starts to prepare to sleep, there's a quiet knock on the door.

"y/n? it's me, are you in there?"

it's hope, and y/n decides that she has to talk to her eventually.

"yeah, i'm here," she mutters, voice still weak from crying.

hope creaks open the door, shutting it gently behind her, and sits at the foot of y/n's bed.

"are you okay?"

"totally fine."

"it looks like you've been crying."

"nope. just... allergies."

a silence falls between them, with a worried look on hope's face as y/n avoids her gaze.

"y/n..."

before hope can even start her sentence, tears are welling in y/n's eyes. she crossed her fingers that hope wouldn't notice, but soon the few tears turned into a small stream.

hope moves closer, wrapping her arms tightly around y/n's torso. "oh, baby... it's okay. you're okay," she whispers, gently scratching the back of y/n's head.

"hope... i am so sorry, i don't know what got into m-"

"shh, hey, it's okay. i understand. i get a period too, you know."

"lizzie said the same thing! like exactly!"

y/n can't help but laugh, and hope soon joins her.

"c'mon, let's get some rest, yeah?"

"only if you'll stay tonight."

"y/n, if you think i'm going anywhere, you have lost your damn mind. but, i think i need to borrow some of your pajamas..."

"say less."

before she knows it, y/n is dead asleep, hope's arm draped lightly over her girlfriend.

hope pulls her closer, planting a light kiss on her forehead.

"sleep tight, don't let penelope park bite," she whispers, giggling quietly to herself.

[erxxi3]

Can you do Leon comforting Reader bcs of a Bad haicut? (Sry english isnt my first language, and my Hair looks so shit rn its making me cry)

uhmm… Yes I will because I feel so fucking bad for you and I hope you recover from your shitty haircut? 💋💋

This fic is really short, but I tried to do you some justice and leon fixes up your hair for you <3

I finished this so fic fast like holy shit-

This day was absolutely horrible.

The hairstylist fucked your hair up and your forced to go home to your boyfriend looking like shit without a way to fix it, but surely it isn’t that bad right?

I mean…it really was BAD. everybody stared at you and laughed and whispered and pointed, some people even started to pity you. The worst part about this whole mess is the fact you didn't know why they were doing that in the first place.

It just wasn't normal for them to be so mean towards you. You knew how to handle people being mean to you but this was something else entirely. You weren't used to these types of things.

You walked down the streets with your head down staring at your feet, trying to hide from everybody's eyes. You tried hard not to let their stares bother you too much, because they weren't your fault. You could do nothing wrong. You'd been here before so many times, after all, it probably wasn't as bad now that you thought back on it. Right?

But, oh god, did it suck. Every time someone looked at you they laughed and snickered. And, oh god…when you thought this could get worse you run into your boyfriend on the way back down the street to your house as he is getting the mail. He doesn't see you and doesn't notice you.

Your eyes go wide as you try to get away from him without drawing attention to yourself but unfortunately, you're walking too fast and he catches up with you quickly.

His arms are crossed over his chest. His expression is unreadable as usual. You look at him nervously for a second before you can feel a hand land on your arm. "Y/N," Leon says softly. You wince internally.

"We need to talk." That's when he notices your hair. "What happened to your hair?" His voice sounds kind of angry and hurt.

Oh my God…he's going to hate me or dislike it right?.

He always does. You swallow thickly as you glance to the side nervously. "Did your hairdresser do that?" He asks, sounding annoyed. You nod slowly.

He looks surprised for a moment, maybe even a little hurt. “Lets get you home, I had a feeling that something has been making me feel uneasy today.” You don’t say anything, you don’t want to argue. He pulls you along behind him, his long black coat swishing against the cement as he walks.

As you both walk inside he guides you to take a seat and he tries his beat to comfort you. “Do you wanna tell me what was bothering you?” He asks quietly. You shrug in response, still staring at your hands folded in your lap.

He sighs heavily. “Okay. If you want to keep quiet then we will.” That makes you look up and stare at him in surprise.

“Just let me make you atleast feel better than before.” Leon takes some scissors and a brush and touched your hair up with gentle motions. He hummed in approval when he finally finished and went to grab some paper and a pencil from the kitchen. “I have no idea why you haven’t had an idea to ask me to cut your hair before, it might help make you feel more comfortable rather than letting some hairstylist make it shitty.”

He pauses for a second before starting to gaze into your eyes through the mirror, which made you feel as if he was eye fucking you. Your cheeks flushed pink. “It looks fine. Better than fine even. Just keep it that way. You’re beautiful.” Your heart jumped at how sweet he said those words.

His fingers brushed across your cheek gently before returning to cutting your bangs into a short style. You closed your eyes as he gently pulled you in for a small kiss, then a few minutes later he was done fixing your hair. “Thank you,” you mumbled as he set the scissors and the paper aside.

“You’re welcome. I hope that helped a bit,” Leon replied, placing a kiss on your forehead as he got up. You felt butterflies erupt in your stomach and you smiled softly.

Your boyfriend always managed to make your mood improve somehow even if it wasn’t necessarily intentional. He gave off an aura that seemed to make everything okay again, even the most difficult days. Even just talking about you made him happier than anything and he was very good at that sort of thing.

You couldn’t believe you found such amazing boyfriend.

[cheemken]

Im curious about your au👀

Just what happened that Vertin got possessed? Would the others know it's Arcana and not Vertin?

Hehehe finally I get to talk abt this

Anyways for context, it's this lil drawing I made hahah

But yeah, what I had in mind for this au is like,, a mission that went awry. I had this au prior to the reveal of chapter 7, but w chapter 7 in the works, well, ofc this now turned to some sort of canon divergent au

The main premise is that yeah a mission that went awry and Vertin and her team retreated back to the Suitcase somewhere safe. The thing is, Vertin became desperate, she knew they were outnumbered, it was a losing battle, especially how injured some of her friends are. So she decided on smth

Once she was sure everyone was inside the suitcase, she called in Sonetto, y'know, asked her to have a walk a her outside the suitcase. And stuff happened, Sonetto seeing Vertin seal the suitcase shut, and she's there wondering why, and suddenly Vertin gives her a teleport ritual, as she hands her the suitcase too. Vertin telling her that hey, the seal will be broken once Sonetto finds a safe place to stay, she doesn't care where, the Foundation, Green Lake, Laplace, as long as it's safe, as long as it's far away as to where they currently are

Sonetto ofc refused, she's not leaving the Timekeeper behind, but Vertin was desperate, she doesn't want anyone to get hurt anymore, and used her authority as Timekeeper and Sonetto's superior to order her to leave, to find a safe place, and aughgh ur honour it's so messy, that Vertin really has to shove Sonetto out the way bc she can hear the footsteps of the Manus followers. And so, Sonetto ran, and ran, as far away as she could, before using the ritual, teleporting back to the Foundation

And this is where things get fun ouo

But like, I don't think I can really type it out in its entirety bc hey I might get reported, but in a nutshell it involves Schneider's guns, Arcana's manipulation and illusions (like that scene in c2), Vertin's old friends, Schneider's guns shoved in Vertin's mouth, cannibalism, and oranges lmfao

So mind break, in a way, Arcana breaking Vertin so much so to the point that Vertin's mind doesn't know what's real and what's not anymore. Vertin being so vulnerable, that it was the perfect time for Arcana to just,, lodge her wand through Vertin's head too, taking full control of her

I had this idea that,, Arcana really played the role of Vertin well

Bc she came back to the Foundation, and ofc, in he eyes of everyone it's just Vertin, finally she's back, finally she's home, as her team rushes to her and was so damn happy she's back. Vertin even apologized to Sonetto, for using her authority to push her away, but Sonetto always tried to understand her, she knew it was for the best

But yeah I think a few would notice

Druvis would, I think she would, bc she was from Manus, she's familiar w the aura Arcana has, she feels it from Vertin. But in her mind, well, ofc, bc Vertin was kinda held hostage by Manus, by Arcana, perhaps Vertin was still getting used to not being there anymore, that the stench of death that usually follows Manus Vindictae would be temporary on Vertin

I think Regulus would notice too, solely for the fact Vertin now doesn't indulge her on listening to their favourite record. Vertin never refused that, not ever, that was the first alarm that went off her head. The second is when Vertin started using that baton of a wand she has more and more, and she uses it in a way that hey, it's not like a conductor leading an orchestra, no, it's more like a seasoned arcanist w a deep knowledge of magic

And Sonetto, ofc, ever perceptive, always w the Timekeeper. Back then, whenever Vertin looks at her, it makes her feel warm inside, knowing she still has her by her side. Now, whenever Vertin looks at her, well,, she feels uneasy, like she's a prey being stalked by a predator, that one wrong move and she'll get killed. But,, that can't be, the Timekeeper is the kindest person she knows, so,, what's wrong?

But also can you imagine, in Vertin's mindscape, Arcana just forces her to watch as she gains the trust of Vertin's friends. Oh, how exciting it'd be to watch them all fall one by one once they find out the truth. Or rather, once they fall by the hands of their precious Timekeeper, of their dearest friend Vertin.

[fatuismooches]

ITS 💌 ANON!! as per usual i come to you with a headcanon at ungodly hours of the night in my time. i’ve been playing too much honkai star rail…BUT!! fluff and angst combo again 🏃 ure the best :(( pls don’t follow my example and get proper rest !! thanks for always being cool hehe

Dottore making a medicine that actually does work!! you can move around like normal, no longer as tired, and ofcourse- Dottore is thrilled. He’s done it, he kisses them and he takes reader everywhere, every single place he wanted to- he checked everything, they were fine…until suddenly, they fainted and he basically finds out that the medicine could only make everything good for a short amount of time before putting reader in the most excruciating pain possible after, so sadly, zandik curses himself and gets back to work :(( he dosent care about the sacrifices, he dosent care what he has to give and what gets taken away as long as you don’t. He’s a committed man and he’s committed for until after life. Literally will reincarnate with you if he can because he will *not* let go.

TO THE FLUFF THOUGH! zandik taking atleast 1 hour everyday to do something that you like because he realizes that you miss him (and he misses you too). At first he was wary because he wanted to ensure that he could get you cured as soon as possible, but he couldn’t handle it if you were all sad and gloomy either. He didn’t want you to think of yourself as a burden and god forbid, you try to leave again (referring to that one ask where reader leaves bc they feel like a burden,, in feel like he’s be so damn scared…even if he won’t admit it). So reading you a book? sure, just be prepared for many side comments if it’s some cheesy romance novel or him reading a textbook. Drawing? hell, he’ll draw an anatomical heart with you holding it! Cuddling? he’ll wrap you up in his fluffy coat and hug you as much as you want.

- 💌 anon

AWW ILYY 💌 ANON!! Hehe I am trying my best to go to sleep earlier... it's a work in progress. Also i feel you on the HSR brainrot but I'm TBL 57, have no good artifacts since I haven't farmed, and stuck on the deer boss fight 💀 i gotta get on the grind soon 😫🫠 But you better get proper rest too!!! Or else- 💖💖

NOOO THE FLUFF GETS IMMEDIATELY WIPED AWAY TO ANGST- I can't imagine the sheer happiness you two would feel. Reader, of course, would be absolutely elated and very plainly show how delighted they are. You're running, hopping, Dottore even twirls you around and you do a pretty little spin as you fall back into his arms. You're so happy, you haven't smiled or laughed this much in ages. Dottore, as usual, doesn't show nearly as much emotion as you, but don't let that fool you. Internally, he's feeling something he has never felt before, so foreign that normally he'd be trying to get rid of it but this time he knows exactly why he's having this feeling. Thrilled, excited, proud, enthusiastic, words that could not even begin to fully describe this feeling. Centuries of work finally paid off, never to have to be repeated again. To see you so purely happy, makes him look forward to things going back to how they once were. Oh, how much fun you'd have joining him as his assistant again. The whole atmosphere and feelings of the clones in the lab are in sync for once.

Except... it all comes crashing down. Literally. When you collapse in his arms with ragged breaths, skin searing to the touch, actual tears begin to form from how badly it hurts. Immediately the mood from early deflates as he rushes to get you back to normal and ease your suffering </3 To have something he desires right in his hands, just to be snatched away from him with no warning is something he's never experienced before. He is a scholar, possibly one of the most intelligent beings in Teyvat. Such a thing shouldn't have happened to him. But it did, and he has to start over. He probably killed some people to blow off steam. No remorse. Just anger.

Sigh sigh I LOVE THIS SM. Normally, he'd scoff if it was any other activity. Especially when it's boring meetings. A whole hour? For nonsense? He finds it meaningless. His 24 hours are spent doing important things. Important things being research, experiments, notes... and you, of course. You're right, when Dottore has a goal or something he wants to reach, he just throws himself into it. No breaks, nothing, he just wants to make progress, progress, progress. Especially when it's you on the line. He'll refuse any and all contact. But he's come to realize your state deteriorates even more if your needs are not met by him. Not to mention the clones are sending messages to each other internally about how sad you are, which he decides he overhears way too frequently </3 So he knows he has to put a stop into it. (And yes, that ask was sad as hell, I still think about it 😭🥺)

Love how we agree he's a pro at drawing anatomical stuff hehe. You cut out the hearts he draws and put them on your walls or something ;( And also AHHHH THE FLUFFY COAT CUDDLING... No words can describe how much I love that scenario. It's so cute to think about both of you wearing it at the same time... you're on his lap, he's wearing the coat but it's swallowing your whole body up anyway since it's wrapped around, the fluff tickling your face!! <3 The book is in your hand, you both take turns reading it but Dottore interrupts whenever something dumb is said or done. Oh.. but you end up falling asleep since his voice is so relaxing and his chest is so comfy..

Ughhh eternal lovers with Dottore is hitting me right now ;( Especially when you talked about his commitment... hell yes this crazy doctor will not bat an eye at anyone else besides you it doesn't matter how long it's been. For you he has no limits. He always be intrigued and into this person who managed to worm their way into his cruel cold heart...

[my-castles-crumbling]

hello cas! how are you?

i just wanted to ask something, i dont know, maybe have a little validation? im not sure

i have and regularly use a tumblr blog, and im an active ao3 author who will often project onto characters, both because its easier to write what i know and also because it makes for good storytelling. theres one thing though that i never talk about, not on my blog and not in my writing, but i feel like i should be?

i dont remember the silly medical word for it, but theres some condition on my dad's side of the family where weve got a higher chance of going blind, and usually earlier in life than most. my aunt has it, my grandfather had it, my older brother has it, and i have it. i didnt know my grandfather bc he died before i was born, but i know it only started affecting my aunt a little into her 50s, though it was much earlier for me and my brother (hes 27 and has about 50% of his vision, and im 20 and have about 70%, and for both of us what we have is also very blurred)

again, its not really something i talk about. ive been learning braille for when the inevitable comes (so far ive learned the alphabet and common conjunctions i can expect, so now im moving onto becoming more comfortable and confident feeling it all out) and honestly im pretty okay about it. its not that ive given up, im just... neutral? i have my peace with it. im working with what ive got or whatever, i dunno

but i feel like i should be... doing something with it? like, sharing my experience or using my writing to create representation. im always reading about people projecting their disabilities onto characters (especially remus, in place of his lycanthropy in muggle aus) like deafness, or epilepsy, or chronic pain, or migraines, but i rarely read about blind characters/sight impaired characters, and i just wonder like... should i be writing that? should i be doing something?

i dont know if this even makes sense haha. i just feel some sort of obligation to talk about it, but especially because i already project onto my characters with my mental health issues etc it almost feels like id also be writing about myself *too* much? it feels like theres no winning

im also sort of nervous that if i *did* bring it up on my blog now, that people might think im just making it up or something because ive never mentioned it before. i also dont know everything about it, and if people asked me something i didnt have an answer to, im afraid of that too. as though just because im losing my vision i should know every single thing there is to know about blindness. its silly and i know that, but it still makes me nervous to talk about it after all this time

Hi! <3

I understand why you feel this way, but please know that you don't owe anyone anything just because you have a disability. You're not obligated to be an activist or educator, in any way, shape, or form. There are plenty of aspects of my life I choose not to talk about and boundaries I draw when it comes to talking about my life on tumblr, and that's okay! Nobody who is part of a group that needs representation has to be the person to create that representation. For example, while I work to create trans representation in my writing, I choose not to address a lot of my childhood trauma. Sure, I could write about having a parent who is an addict, but I choose not to, and that's a choice I'm allowed to make, just as you are!

However, if you DO choose to talk about it and someone accuses you of faking? 1. Ew. Block them. 2. Send them to me. That's horrible and they need to be yelled at.

Naming you validation anon

[fandomregression]

uhhh tim as a regresser? i know hes usually a cg in your fics but i kinda relate to him so much

while i see him mainly as a cg, thats mostly bc i want him to be my cg, but i absolutely see how he could be a regressor so rAMBLING TIIIIIIIME

Regressor Tim Stoker Headcanons!

so tim starts regressing actually kinda young, in his early teens, because he's always lived in his brother's shadow. always been the second, despite being the older child, and its. hard. he pretends everything's okay and he isnt jealous, but he wants. needs. attention too

he learns what regression is exactly in university, and he kinda just shrugs and says 'yep that tracks' and pushes it to the side. let's bury that problem and deal with it later! that's a problem for Future Tim!

future tim is very mad and small, now. he spends a lot of time crying into his pillow and hugging his childhood stuffie, a little doggy named spot, until he falls asleep

he tries to basically never let dating partners find out abt his regression that doesn't seem like a good thing

a few of them do, and a couple try their hands at being cgs. they give up because tim is "too much" for them to handle

then danny dies, and tim spirals

hes just really, really not okay. he spends so much of his time trying to research what happened, trying to learn about the circus, trying to find anything that explains why his little brother is dead, and he can't figure it out. and he just tears himself apart over it. he's on the verge of regressing pretty much all the time, he's crying his eyes out all the time, and everything is bad. by the time he starts working at the magnus institute, he's a shell of a man whose head always feels like its swimming

then he meets jon, and he can tell there's something familiar in the ways he acts. tim's almost certain jon is a regressor, and well...he's nothing if not a good big brother. and he's a big brother who really, really welcomes this distraction from the fact that his little brother is dead

he does his best to keep jon out of trouble and take care of him, but he's well aware of his own headspace encroaching on all of this. its not easy. little things that tim does for jon are things that make tim regress, so its. not going too well!

until they meet sasha :)

sasha notices these two are a lil different pretty quickly. its become even more evident when they're researching a case, end up at a park, and jon and tim are playing on the playground like little kids

tim is very excited about this, and he absolutely climbs on top of the monkey bars and shouts for sasha

"sasha! sasha! look at me!!! :D!!!" "i see you! you're up so high!!"

she pushes them both on the swings, she pushes them both on the merry-go-round, and it feels just so natural to them

(tim picks her some dandelions and clovers, too, and sasha adores it)

after that day, when tim's big again, he realizes that sasha was able to actually play with both of them and pay attention to tim even though he was bigger than jon...sasha actually wanted to take care of *tim* and jon at the same time...and he didn't feel neglected...

(he cried himself to sleep again that night, but he wasn't sure why it felt so painful) (its the neglect trauma)

at work, tim basically just starts feeling a pull toward sasha a lot of the time, and he's terrified of being too much for her, but he...he needs this...

if he finds a cool bug, he takes a picture to show her. cool rock, he takes it inside and gives it to her. he likes to draw little doodles on his sticky notes and give them to her, and it absolutely makes his heart soar every single time she sticks them to her monitor. he's just. thriving off the affection

jon is the first one to explain regression, and he expects both tim and sasha to just push him away. he is absolutely not expecting tim to say he's a regressor too (how jon didn't notice? well...poor baby's not very observant...) and they're both not expecting sasha to just say "oh i know, who wants a juice box?"

both just. malfunctioning

tim does regress older than jon, usually around 6-8, and he takes his job as big bubby VERY seriously. he holds jon's hand when they do anything, he is always imparting his wisdom (which has been "red crayons taste bad" and variations of that multiple times), and he tries to let jon get more attention from sasha

sasha does not take too well to that last one. she notices pretty quickly that tim sacrifices himself for jon, and that just won't fly. so, extra hugs. extra kisses. lots of one-on-one playtime. tim cries a lot over this

then they move down to the archives and yay!! martin!!! now tim and jon have a mama and a papa and its even easier for them to both get the attention they need (especially tim, who doesn't feel as guilty when there's two cgs he can go to whichever one isn't handling jon)

tim has a lot of games he likes to play, and he has quite a few stuffies, but a lot of the time he likes playing nintendo with martin (and jon watches and tells him how cool he is)

sasha and martin both learn pretty quickly that anything circus/clown themed is very much a no-no with tim. if he's already regressed, its the quickest way to a panic attack he can get. if he isn't regressed, he will be very shortly, and then the panic attack happens

at that point its just...hugs and comfort until he can stop crying

when it comes down to it, he's just glad to finally have this sort of support system. to have multiple people who care about him and actually try

[catboyklug]

sam & max hcs

title

this is specifically for sam & also max bc im most confident w my interpretations of them but once i play & finish tdp i'll make a post for every single other character .

quick disclaimer that this is for my sorta-AU thing where i make sense of the games and cartoon and comics by saying that each was an autobiographical (or just biographical) piece of media that they signed their rights away to. the comics were more or less exactly what happened, the cartoon was scripted half the time (with the bad day on the moon episode actively having been staged) and the games are more or less 1:1 to what happened except for the occassional references to them being. games.

also this isnt a totally exhaustive list

sammy

canon to get it outta the way: he's black, bisexual, autistic and might be trans & objectum (i hc him to definitely be the last two lmao) . i hc he has Narcissistic Traits tee em and also might have OCD

he started developing arthritis in his 20's, which was made only worse by his horrible posture due to his career path of Massive Fucking Nerd. though he fixed his back posture-wise by the time he formed the freelance police, he still is in a lot of pain near constantly.

even when he makes jokes, he wants to be taken seriously at all times. he wants you to laugh at his cleverness, not at the fact that you find him inherently funny. he tends to take this a bit far sometimes, which is part of one of the many reasons as to why he treated max so terribly in the early telltale games

since he was a pup he's tried to hide the fact he's bisexual, even if he's completely normal abt max being out as gay and doesn't see an issue with it in any sense of the term

he really wanted to be an engineer for years, but the intense sexism of the field, a desire to stick around with max, and the fact that other jobs would pay him better lead him to abandon the thought

though he wouldn't mind having children, he doesn't actively want them as much as max does. this doesn't mean he dislikes children at all, though - he actually likes them more than max does, at least conceptually

not too long after the cartoon's release, he lost contact with most of his family, excluding ruth. this was fully intentional on his part: max's refusal to talk to his family except at gatherings he stole food and drugs from inspired him to take more control of his life and contact with people he's related to

he sort of wants to grow his hair out again, but isn't sure what style to get... (i like drawing him w afros though)

completely opposite to max's feelings, sam feels a strictly familial or platonic attraction to lumpy. and platonic being based offa that plato fun fact is very very definitely relevant here i think (im sorry)

if he went with any other job, it'd have to be letterist, full stop. he has several styles of handwriting and they're all gorgeous

he's a super sweet, incredibly silly drunk, and lets himself relax and show more of his dog mannerisms when drunk enough (thank you celebrity poker 2 i love you)

maxamillion

canonically a narcissistic psychopath who might have schizophrenia. its ok i can reclaim him<333 (no i cant but my partner can) he also has a horrible family life but his family stuck together out of mutual hatred and a desire to reap society's rewards for the nuclear standard

this horrible shithead has prolly claimed to have every physical disability at some point but he's only been diagnosed w/ hypermobile joint disorder / ehler-dahlos

in the more modern time of 2024, he usually sticks to only mocking people for things that are a. traits he shares with them or b. actually disturbing, inhumane or generally Yucky

he's wanted kids for years, which is why he's constantly not-so-subtly mentioning it.

he's a deeply unprofessional drag queen AND drag king and loves playing around with both sides of the coin. he also does drag creature stuff but that's just how he normally looks so!

thanks to the autism and schizophrenia he's very touch averse. the only people he really wants touching him are sam (and sometimes, maybe, rarely, flint paper)

to say that he doesn't have any familial affection for lumpy is understating it. he uses lumpy as his personal (and fully consenting) stimtoy whenever he feels like it, regardless of where or who might see 'em.

he sometimes pretends he's still president to make people do stuff for him. this only works on sam though

though he's physically capable of handwriting so gorgeous it rivals sam, he saves that for the disgustingly cheesy, 'anonymous' love letters he sends him every year or seven

he's a mainer. a mainiac if ya will. grew up closer to the south and he's got some relatives from mass so he's got that masshole/bostoner accent. he's usually good at hiding his accent, but it's obvious when you ask him to say shit like "clam chowder" and "lobster" and "fish"

though he hates most country music, he still loves johnny cash

HES A SYSTEM BTW!!!!

botha them

they invented paralell play. sam w his computers and his papers and max with his drawing and stabbing the desk until it looks like a modern art piece

they're both extremely jealous of other people, but somehow have both missed that. sam's worried he's too jealous and overprotective, while max thinks he could stand to be a little more obsessive

one of their favorite things to do together is go to the comic book store and laugh at how horrible their childhood favorite comics have gotten (or always were)

every wedding shown is canon in some way, but around the telltale games sam started thinking they were just 'ironic' and 'a joke' and etc. despite the EXTREMELY high budget each had. he knows better now

max's whole "not making fun of anyone unless they're enough like him (or suck)" actually extends to sam as well. he's more than fine with making fun of someone bc they're fat or whatever despite the fact he clearly isn't. this is MOSTLY because he keeps forgetting he and sam don't share every single experience.

though sam is against drinking as a whole, the two sometimes go out to horribly shitty bars to get the worst in junk food & beer. every time they do, max happily proclaims that it was the best date EVER.

max almost likes sam's singing, sometimes, but this is usually only because he just really likes sam's voice

neither of them know how to use modern technology. when one finds out a single way a single program or feature works, they excitedly show the other like they just found the missing link between humans and neanderthals or whatever

sam helps with max's injections since max really seriously can't handle needles. it's the worst for the both of them, but the treats and snacks and ten-hour-long movie binges after help with the fear

generally speaking, max can get up and out of bed any time from around 6 to 13. sam gets up at 6:30 or 7:45 exactly every day, which means he usually makes breakfast if he feels up to cooking.

other than the aforementioned horrible bars, they have a lot of 'weird' date locations, like the dog park, the local sewer system, hell, etc.

yeay

[skitskatdacat63]

Tysm for the tags @monacobasedgirldad @schumigrace @fernandoalonzoo sry im a bit late getting to this lol

Are you named after anyone?

My great great grandmother(I think??), though she was named Katarzyna, and I was born Catherine, but go by Catie obviously(this lowkey annoys my mom lmao, especially bcs if I were to have a nickname, it was supposed to be Cate.)

When was the last time you cried?

Today, over classical music. I think I cry at least once a day 😭 I am very emotional

Do you have kids?

Nope :)

What sports did you play/have you played?

I played soccer when I was a kid. Also does marching band count?

Do you use sarcasm?

All the fucking time, literally constantly. And also we sarcastically bully each other in my family, so I have to pull myself back from accidentally insulting people 😭

What is the first thing you notice about people?

Hmmmm, I feel like ive done this tag game before bcs I remember writing this exact answer. But usually I notice if someone is a good conversationalist or not. Like do they like to lead the convo, do they like to listen to the other people, do they talk too much, too little, are they awkward about it? It's just very interesting to me, bcs I think that kinda thing really does instantly show you if you're going to be compatible with a person(as a friend or more etc.) Cause I talk a lot a lot, and I think it's difficult to get along w people who are untalkative but also people who talk an equal amnt if not more djkfkglg.

What is your eye color?

Just brown!

Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary movies definitely. I mean im not opposed to a happy ending obviously, but that's not really what im always looking for in a movie, I guess? Rn I'm trying to think of my top movies, and man, not a lot of them have happy endings 😭 But I literally just watched two horror movies the past wknd so! Even though they make me paranoid

Any talents?

I think I could go on a rant about anything if you gave me a bit of time. I really think I can just talk endlessly. Is that a skill? Or is it just annoying..? But yeah I'm not sure, but I think I'm pretty good at absorbing information and being able to go on and on about it.

Where were you born?

America rahhh 🦅🦅 I like my state a lot even though I feel like all my peers keep saying "ugh I don't want to be in [insert state] anymore" Smh how dare you

What are your hobbies?

Mostly drawing! I draw both F1 fanart(pretty much all selfmade AUs tho) and ocs. I like writing lore and worldbuilding and meta, but not really writing itself. I like reading fic and watching movies as well. And I think one of the main things I do these days tbh is read about history and keep up with politics. I get more and more involved with it as the days go by, but unlike drawing, I don't really have an outlet for it sigh sigh. So that's why a lot of AUs involve history and random other things, bcs its fun to involve my interests with each other!

Do you have any pets?

Yes I do! Two cats and two dogs. The cats are named Jin and Frank. Jin is basically me in cat form, he's so anxious 😭 and Frank is like my brother, he's such a little bastard who loves to hiss all the time. My dogs are named Maisie and Ruby. Maisie is a menace to society, but she is also the most beautiful dog ever, so I forgive her. Her name makes me laugh bcs she's named after this book character, Maisie Dobbs right? So her name tag says Maisie Doggs

How tall are you?

Around 5'4

Favorite subject at school?

Politics >:) But I'm pretty interested in philosophy as well rn. Unfortunately my love for foreign languages has been slipping in the semester or so, bcs my professors on that side kinda suck. So I've been putting more energy into my other major, and now all I can talk about is history, politics and philosophy, etc etc. It's just a lot of fun and very interesting to me!

Dream job?

Man, sometimes I wish I could just be a student forever, I just want to keep learning all about the world and other things. But I'd like a job that's not too static, something that pushes me out into the world a bit, maybe smth in the government or like a non-profit idk yet!

Ahhhh I'm doing this a bit late so I'm not sure who's done it yet, I feel like mostly everyone has :,) I tag anyone who's interested, like seriously I'd love to see people's answers who I haven't yet!!

[toastywatchesstevenuniverse]

S1 E40

On the Run

This episode broke me.

I am...

I....

I am a broken creature & my heart has been thoroughly stomped into the ground.

This is....this is the best episode so far....but it's achieved the status of best by absolutely tearing me apart in every way & leaving my emotions as a pile of tear soaked dust.

Okay before we get to that: I have one thing to say....

GARNET HAS MASSIVE AND PLENTIFUL BALLS. Look this post ended up being a lot more personal & emotional than this blog usually has been so I'm giving you a balls joke to balance it out. I have a feeling that there will be more emotional venting if this episode is an indicator of what the rest of the show is like: we're gonna need all the dick & ball jokes we can muster up.

First off: easily the best musical number in the show so far. Yes even better than Pearl's solo number. And I do not say that lightly. That is a tough level to beat. And they did it. Steven & Amethyst take the gold medal for best song so far. 👌

ALSO OH MY GOD THESEE SHOTS THESE COLOURS THIS DJFJFNDIFJW ITS SO FUCKING GOOD????????

WHY DID SO MANY PEOPLE ON YOUTUBE TELL ME THIS SHOW HAS BAD ANIMATION WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT ARE WE WATCHING THE SAME SHOW?????? SURE THERES BEEN SOME WONKY DRAWINGS BUT MOST OF IT HAS BEEN VISUAL GOD TIER SHIT LIKE THIS. This episode was actually quite a step up in the animation compared to the previous ones. It's like the animators stepped on the gas here. I love it.

(Hey there uh so Trigger warning for this post just in case bc I do mention the topics of self harm/self hate/passive suic*de & that kinda stuff. So if that's not your thing, I'm really sorry & I understand if you wanna just stop reading here. If this isn't a topic you like to see mentioned at all, I'll just summarize my opinion here real quick & you can click away, I'm happy you're here at all btw thanks for reading this far!! & I want you to know you're valid for feeling this way btw: Don't let anyone tell you different. Anyways tldr I love this episode & how it tackles Amethysts character & it's the best episode so far & it made me cry really really bad & I am more of an emotional mess now than I usually am.)

So getting a bit personal here: I have said many times throughout my life that 'I never asked to be born'. I still think it now.

(Side Note but oh my god the animation in this fight was fucking incredible. Holy shit. And these shots go so fucking hard they COOKED this shit to perfection.)

Ive been depressed & passively suicidal for most of my life. I honestly cannot really recall a time where I didn't feel this way. I'm just kinda used to it by now I guess.

(This shot. This frame right here. This was when I had to pause the episode to calm down from how bad I was crying.)

So to hear Amethyst say the exact same thing that I have said so many times before: That broke me. That just fucking broke me. And like it's not the first time I cried at this show so far: BUT this IS the first time the show genuinely struck an such an extremely difficult & personal chord with me, not just like being sometihng I relate to, but the chord it struck was deep & painful enough that I had to actually pause the episode because of how much I needed to process it. Like I could not pay attention with how bad it made me break. So yeah it's now score 1 for the amount of times this show has fucking utterly destroyed me. Not every show is able to get me to react like THAT. The only other show in recent memory that got that reaction out of me that I can remember at the time of typing this is well, The Owl House. To be fair I haven't watched too too many new shows but yeah. This got me crying badly enough that I had to take a moment to calm down. Wasn't expecting to have that nerve struck like that.

That just hit on a personal chord for me & just....fuck man. I know that feeling. And they nailed how it feels. Amethysts reaction was exactly how it feels for me, just outwardly anger & tears. It hurts. Obviously anger & crying is simplifying it a lot, it's a lot more than just baseline that but you get what I mean. You could tell that she was feeling that exact way. & holy shit the fact that she's been the "comedic relief" of the gems so far & yet she's had easily the most fucked up & sad backstory of the show so far. Yeah if catching me off guard & completely blindsiding me with this was the goal: Goal fucking achieved because that was like a whack to my fucking face with a frying pan.

So....like, is this gonna be a reoccuring thing? I just.....get the feeling that this is a sign that the show absolutely fucking me up emotionally may become a more frequent thing going forward. So like, if that is the case......fuck. I'm so fucked. I am going to be a fucking wreck by the end of this show. This is gonna fucking leave me a sobbing mess, isn't it? What the fuck have I gotten myself into-

I am afraid. Also I am going to need to buy more tissues.

And the scene where Pearl & Amethyst speak in the hole is some of the best writing in any CN show. Ever.

(Also to break up the depressing talk, OH MY GOD I LOVE THAT PEARL IS SO FUCKING TALL THAT SHE HAS TO BEND DOWN AND SIT STANDING UP ON HER TIPPY TOES. THAT'S SO FUCKING ADORABLE I LOVE HER I AM GOING TO FUCKING LOSE IT.)

This episode was absolutely perfect.

[dateamonster]

what’s your opinion on monstrous transformations (both fast and slow), and also more controversially what do you think about having monsters/nonhuman characters serve as minority allegory (as opposed to society’s hate for them being being an allegory)

ohhh hold on this is a rly good question i think abt a Lot actually.

ok getting the first bit out of the way, love a good monstrous transformation. fast, slow, its all good. i personally like gradual slow shifts the most but its a situational thing. transformation is one of those things that like just always has to be symbolic. even more than the degree to which Everything is symbolic ya know. so like context rly matters when it comes to how to invoke it most effectively.

MOVING ON

i think from the phrasing of the ask ur looking for something more along the lines of like. for example shapeshifters as representation of nonbinary people or aliens as representation of different cultures rather than like monsters vs humans as allegory for racism. but im also not sure you can meaningfully separate the two! the latter i think is more overused so it like registers more as an immediate red flag, but its like. if the aliens from avatar werent being violently invaded by humans it wouldnt make like their reskinned stereotypical indigeneity anymore tolerable i dont think.

which isnt to say i think every story that draws connections between fantastical fictional species and real world people are inherently bad. i dont really think theres any trope that i believe cant be handled well by anyone under any circumstance. the super easy fix to bad rep via monster or fantasy creature characters is basically just have actual humans who also represent those same identities and communities and experiences so that the audience isnt drawn to connect the traits of any one group with your fictional species.

the harder fix is to like seriously analyze why you want this character to be a monster and what that says about them and what that says about you and your own experiences and biases and what you actually want to communicate with the inclusion of this character. and when applicable hire a sensitivity reader. its kinda crazy how many pieces of media seem to prefer half-assing the hard way over just doing the easy thing and not assigning the status of token minority to a literal monster.

of course once again all of this is ya know circumstantial. im speaking to like my own experiences and the things ive observed. and its weird too! bc im also speaking as someone who like is trans and nonbinary and thinks of myself and my gender expression as inherently intertwined with monstrosity. and as someone who is autistic and thinks of myself as a changeling. and as someone who is a fat person who represents themself with a pig themed sona. if i talk abt cringeass hollywood blockbusters engaging in High Fantasy Racism i feel like to be fair i kinda have to talk about independent own-voices creators who write stories and make art about their own identities in the lovely language of monstrosity. theres not rly a way to draw a hard line around the former without the risk of catching some of the latter.

so umm as usual i dont rly have a snappy all encompassing answer for how i feel abt this kind of characterization. im simply too much of a Nuance Enjoyer. i do i guess think this is something that generally turns out better when it is someone making art about their own experiences, but also unless i believe minority artists are a monolith, which i dont, i need to accept that artists will inevitably make stuff that is beautiful and resonant to some people and totally repugnant and offensive to others, and that both of those responses can be like totally justified and correct. thats art babey!

anyway slight digression but i think any case where a character feels more like an allegory than a fully fleshed u know Character is gonna flop for me no matter how relatable it is. tbqh, id rather more ppl try and fail to make beautiful grotesque frightening sensually moving monsters out of their lived experiences and their empathetic connections with others than succeed at creating bland toothless universally approachable Good Rep tm. if u know u know. if u feel me u feel me. that is all.