#not enjoying sex? DONT DO THAT SHIT it doesnt matter!!!

[drdemonprince]

ive got it all folks. exhortations that sex isn't all that important and encouragement for people to conduct emotional affairs, all at once

[orcelito]

Dear fucking God

So I've been dreaming more about my most recent ex lately (likely bc we started dating around this time last year), which is frustrating me Immensely. So I decided, Fuck it, I'd try to join a dating app after all. At least to try see.

Tried looking into what app to use, and it seems like it's an entire goddamn cesspool of bots and disgustingly expensive subscription services. Nothing is rated well. What's rated better is reviewed elsewhere to just be full of hot air. Tinder seems to be mostly for hookups, not interested. Her sounds nice for some, but I'd be uncomfortable there as a nonbinary person. Hinge and Bumble seem to be viewed generally badly too. And it all leads back to OkCupid, which sounds nice In Theory with the selection options, but a lot of people are saying it's gone to the fuckin dumps. But it seems like *everything* is a fucking cesspool, so if something is even a Little bit useful, then maybe it's still worth a try.

So I said fuck it. Let's try OkCupid. Downloaded, started trying to sign up.... and then I get an error message saying it can't create the account????

Like ok. Fuck me I guess. This was a stupid idea anyways.

[ysrjune]

౨: SAM MONROE ໒; TWILIGHT AU PT2

[ more was requested by @speaknow-sw 😋 WHO I ALSO MENTIONED IN HERE WOOOO ROUND OF APPLAUSE. CELEBRITY WHOO???? ]

[ tw: death of a boyfriend and its not pretty ☹️ ]

[ this isnt very accurate to the lore of the twilight sagas. I didnt want to rewrite the stuff that happened in the OG books just replacing Edward with Sam. I wanted to sort of make this my own so it isnt boring + these are just some ideas I have about being with vampire!sam. im not starting off on where I left (basically when Edward leaves bella in new moon.) #notwritingallat ]

[ thank you for the love in part 1 ! feel free to request scenarios about vampire sam <3 I'll get to them as soon as I can. enjoy part 2 ! 🩶]

໒: trying to get Sam into popular artists now doesn't go so well. He doesnt like upbeat pop music by young adult women. Sam prefers MCR, Metallica, Pantera.. you get it. He specifically hates Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Rodrigo. Sabrina is "too girly and talks so much about sex" and Olivia is like another Taylor Swift, singing about her ex boyfriend all the time. You try and tell him that his views on the two women are so wrong and that he should really take the time to listen to the lyrics carefully to get the real meaning behind them, but he refuses.

໒: Sam doesn't like to sit with you and your friends at lunch, he thinks they're too loud and annoying. They gossip a lot, too.. about everyone and everything.

"I dont doubt that they talk about each other." he mumbles to you in the car as he drives you home. "In fact, I know they do." He smirks and taps his finger on the wheel. "I heard what Joanna was thinking about Avery today. She thinks Avery is a brat.. and shes not wrong." Sam had the ability to read anyones mind exacept yours. that was one of the main reasons he wanted you so bad. the old man wanted to figure you out.

"you really need to stop intruding on other peoples thoughts." you smile over at him. "its not exactly like I can just ignore their thoughts, you know? I cant.. mute them or anything like that. Its as clear as when I hear someone speaking. I just.. hear them like if they were right next to me." Sam looks your way for a second, then back at the road. "If I zone out, then sure, I can mind my business and not catch a thing they think about, but.." he half smiles. "those kids are always thinking about some crazy shit. its hard to ignore sometimes."

໒: Sam barley uses his phone. Hes not addicted like everyone else is. Yes, he has social media, but again.. hes not really on it. He has instagram and twitter. A bunch of followers on Instagram but only follows back a few people. His twitter account is private and he only ever uses it to see what bands are announcing tours.

໒: Sam really likes the rain. He likes to go on walks in the forest while its all wet and cold.

໒: Vampires don't sleep but that doesnt stop Sam from taking naps on his comfy bed all the time. Yes, he has a bed. He likes to be comfortable. How could a chair make him as comfortable as a bed? His sheets are grey, blankets navy blue and black. dont doubt that they arent big and soft.

"let me sleep," he whines, tossing to the side where hes not facing you. "Sam, you dont sleep. You dont get sleepy." you remind him and pick at his hair. "Then there must be something wrong with me because I feel sleepy as hell." he furrows his eyebrows. "now shut up and leave me alone, loser." it doesn't matter that you're his girlfriend *or whatever* (is how he'd put it) hes still mean to you sometimes.. like.. genuinely.

໒: he likes to lay on your chest to hear your heart beat. it 'helps him sleep' (😒)

໒: When you first started dating, Sam HATED when you would try to kiss him. He said it was because hes older, and it feels wrong, but really, he just didn't want you to kiss him. he was uncomfortable with it and chose not to hurt your feelings.

"I told you to lay off, you're too young to be kissing all over me, kid." he shoved his hands in his hoodie pocket. "Sam, you cant say that out loud.." you look around, catching people glancing at you. "they'll forget about it tomorrow. just.. stop, alright? its weird."

໒: josh and you were close. especially when Sam had left. Josh made you happy, and you made him happy.. maybe a little too much. He developed a crush on you. A huge one. It bothered Sam more than anything. "that dirty dog wouldn't know how to handle you." he would say with jealousy. "pretty girl like you needs a man who can handle her random outbursts and shit like that." he would boop your nose and kiss you on the lips (now that hes finally comfortable) "throw him a bone or something instead."

໒: he still talks like hes in 2001, but hes caught up on a few new slang words.

“Meli found out that we're seeing eachother.” Sam voices to you nervously, pacing his room. He thought he was being so slick with you. Somehow he managed to make it seem like you and him were strictly friends to his family, but his sister had a vision 2 weeks before you even moved to Forks. She didnt see anything about Sam leaving you that one time, though. All she saw was a cute relationship with you and her brother. "im COOKED." he yells and plops on his bed. "Sam, I think shes known." she told you anyway. "whatever, shut up and let me lock in." (sleep) IF that's even what he does 😐

“hey,im hungry” - sam 💘 at 2:34pm

sam texts you in the middle of class. you roll your eyes and respond.

“you dont get hungry.”

“don't tell me what I do and dont feel. thats toxic. im hungry.”

he couldnt have meant thirsty. if he wanted blood, he'd straight up say it with no problem.

“come on im just trying 2 take you out on a date after school..jeez.”

“I want pizza”

“FFFFFFUCK no. pick something else.”

“I thought this was about me”

“my god bro okay fine hurry up when class ends so we can go quick. always some fatties over there who make it right after school.”

“so.. you never told me.” you start small talk on the car ride. "told you what?" "like.. you know. about drinking blood. whats it like?" sam smirks and glances over at you. "its amazing. feels like a whole new different drug to me. human blood, that is." he makes a turn, pulling into the driveway of the pizza joint. "Kevin doesnt allow us to hunt humans. we're like.. the vegetarians of vampires." you furrow your eyebrows in confusion. "what does that even mean?" "we drink blood from animals, stupid." he rolls his eyes and turns off the car. "I go against his rules sometimes, though." he looks over to you, eyeing your neck. "sam," you say nervously, making him laugh. "you really thought I was gonna eat you?" "well yeah! you're.. a vampire! I have blood in me! and the way you eyed me was.. I dont know." sam shakes his head. "I cant kill you," he starts, the smile wiping off his lips. "I dont know what I'd do without you."

you stayed in the car for atleast 10 more minutes while he told you about how hes killed people in the past, rebelling against his mother and mostly father. He revealed to you how he killed and sucked dry one of the jocks he hated back when he was alive.. and it was over a girl. "I liked this girl named Evie," he says with no shame. he thought you would understand since it was a long time ago, and luckily you did. "She was really nice to me when nobody else was. I cant lie, I was mean to her. I told her to leave me alone cause she was annoying, but really, I just didnt wanna catch feelings for her." "why not?" "she was too good for me. also her boyfriend hated my guts. He thought I was a freak who didnt deserve any friends." sam told you as he was looking out the window to the gloomy view outside. "He called me a loser, punched me once.. one time him and his football friends decided to jump me in the bathroom." he recalls. "I wanted to do something about it so bad but I knew he'd just kick my ass again. After like a week of jumping me I heard how bad of a boyfriend he was to Evie. He smacked her around, called her names, cheated on her.. a lot of things. It pissed me off cause by then I actually started to let myself fall for her. After she found out that her boyfriend, Van, and his friends kicked my ass she never left me alone. She hungout with me in a classroom during lunch, convinced me to give her my number.. so you know. she was always sending me messages." he fills you in about how she was so nice to him. "I died like two months after that. I stalked her at school a few times and I saw that she was really upset about me. "

"she even convinced her friends and a few other people to decorate my locker with stuff like 'rest in piece' and 'never forgotten'," sam looks over at you, a little surprised that you were actually invested in this story. "keep talking, hello?" you say, making him chuckle. "she just kept me in her life and prayers after I died, alright? you get it." he clears his throat. "but uh.. I remembered Van after a while. I remembered how much I hated him. So after one of his football games, I payed him a little visit in the lockers."

[ The lights in the locker rooms were flickering and buzzing as Van changed back into his regular clothes. It was cold.. a little bit colder than usual, and the vibe in there was off. Van tried to shake it off, but he was just getting creeped out even more by the minute. All of a sudden, one of the lockers shut. Van looked over to it.. nobody was there. Then he felt a chill go up his spine. He turns around and yells in fear when he sees Sam. "What the hell?!" He yells as he stays against the lockers. He didn't realize it was Sam at first.. he was paler than usual, and his eyes were a deep creepy red. "Sam? Is—no.. you're dead. you died 4 days ago. how could this be?!" Van freaks out. Sam smiled and shook his head. "Dont worry about it," He steps closer, up in Vans face. "All you should know right now is that you're next. you're going to die, Van." he whispers. "im gonna make sure its painful, too." he threatens. "Sam, come on." Van whimpers, holding onto one of Sams shoulders. "thats—thats what guys do, man.. beat eachother up, you know?" he nervously laughs, sweat dripping from his forehead. "you got it all wro‐" he chokes. he choked because sam wrapoed his hand around Vans neck. "shut the fuck upp," sam laughs. "this isnt just about you being a jackass to me. you're such a dick to Evie. you dont deserve her." he throws Van across the walkway. Sam said a few more things, scaring and threatening Van even more before actually killing him to make it hell. ]

Sam didnt explain the whole murder of Van too well. It was too graphic, he thought.. because he didn't just suck the life out of Van.. he did ripped off an arm and a leg. You didnt need to know that, but just thinking about it made Sam smile to himself. a little wider than he already was when explaining every else to you. "Whatever, it was years ago. He got what he deserved." Sam sighs and opens the car door. "Wait," you touch his cold hand. "What about Evie? What happened to her?" Sam messes with his labret and looks back at you. "She moved to New York and had two kids. A boy and a girl.. her boys name is Samuel."

@bxbyysstuff @anakinstwinklebunny @lovethestarrs @literally-izzy @valloos @anisangeldust @alexlovesysrjune

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[fairys-dream]

vent about the nb experience..(referencing some wolvie panels from What If?…1989, issue #93)

i consider my views on my 'gender' very unique compared to others, to the point where i believe using any words to attempt to describe my experience would get misunderstood. due to that, i dont belong in any boxes, so its hard to exist within the queer community at all(cuz of everyone relying on labels)

hunter or hunted. predator or prey. man or beast. male or female. man or woman. guy or girl. butch or femme. gay or lesbian. cis or trans. gender or genderless.

im at the point where i consider myself more 'beast' than the sort of man i was, or thought i was supposed to be. yet, i still have ties to some kind of experience, so im not entirely without gender...its like. everyone else around me puts their gender first, while i put myself first, and that other stuff is just extra. i dont consider my 'male' features as a guy thing, its just how my body looks. i dont consider the words i use as being my gender, its just how i attempt to communicate my emotions

'so are u nonbinary in a fag way or a dyke way? u cant lack a side entirely.'

this is kinda why i identified with fag for so long..but lately i havent even been considering myself gay or trans anymore, just existing without needing to put a label on how i feel(tho tbh ive considered just picking heterosexual for the Bit, due to my attraction to those with physically the opposite sex to me. an extension of the Bit would also be to switch my sex label back to F, but that’d likely get me kicked outta some airports..X would be pretty good too)

my experience is still undeniably queer no matter what i say about myself. ive been on hrt for almost 7 years, ive had top surgery, ive changed my legal name n sex, i pass as ‘male’ no matter how i dress or how much makeup i put on, how could i be allowed to use any other words if ive done all the things that lock me into a queer lifestyle? do i even get the choice to not be such at this point?

why do we divide different human experiences up into 2 different sides anyway?

ig thats why i feel so attached to logan. he doesnt belong with humans, and he doesnt belong with mutants. he could pass as both, normal or queer, but on the inside he knows theres still always gonna be something disconnected about himself that keeps him from truly feeling at home in either categories

ngl i probably just need some nonqueer friends again who dont know shit about any queer experiences so i can trust theyre not making any assumptions. being in the queer community this past decade has been the most alienated ive ever fucking felt, trying to find home in a place where by all means of logic i should belong, and never getting there. i think i'd rather just be seen as a mutant thru the eyes of those who confidently dont understand, rather than those who think they do due to being in the same community(this isnt saying i havent enjoyed my queer friends company, its just theres always this underlying layer of worry in the way im being viewed ig)

this bit from fight club describes it pretty well i think—

its knowing that others are likely only loving me due to the familiarity in false perceptions of me, trusting me only cuz they think we share the same experience

i dunno. im just tired of people perciving me n thinking they know me just based on some words. i wish i could describe myself in a way where u could.

[missn00tson]

Yoo Wooin headcanons

Hi, the Wooin landscape is barren af, so Im here to offer my headcanons abt him.

Hope you enjoy!

Nb!Reader

Sfw:

He's Bi, or def fruity in some shape or form.

I once read abt him being in a poly relationship and it has been ingraved in my mind ever since.

Def the type of guy to do a lot of pda. He likes to slap your ass in public, a lot. He's not the type of guy to be gentlemanly and open the door for you, but when he does he will slap your ass as he enters after you.

How comfortable he is with you changes a lot about how he acts with you. When you've been a thing or sortof thing for a long time he will get less... annoying? Dont get me wrong, he's still a litle shit but shows more of a caring side of his. It also ups his aftercare, like, he doesn't leave u or kick u out right after sex.

True to the story he's a little shit always up to somthing, and up for anything. He'd prolly not think twice if you suggest to do smth strange or dangerous.

Would spoil u excessively w gifts. I cant promise u theyre pretty (you have seen his fashion style, its not for everyone) but they will be expensive for sure.

Buys you matching clothes and expects you to wear them so he can show you off.

Will ask you to draw anything and get it tattooed. No mater how good your drawing skills r, if u can hold a pen you're good.

He's pretty good at drawing himself, but just like the rest of him his drawing style is rather... unique. He had been interested in becoming a tattoo artist for a while, and would become one if he didnt get as much money from illegal activities as he does.

Would do drugs and other types of substances with you for fun. He especially loves doing it before and after you've fucked.

He has the most obnoxious alarm ever (if he even feels like getting anywhere on time) and takes too damn long to turn it off.

Types with the most incoherent text messages ever. His texts r abbreviations from hell and as short as they can be. The only emojys he uses r 😎 and 🖕🏻

If you use the middle finger emoji tho he'll tell u it means u have a small dick just to annoy you.

Leaves you on read when you dont ask for a specific answer. He wont answer with an "okay" or anything either.

Would randomly call u at 3am and ask u if he was with u last night when the cops ask him for an alibi. It doesnt matter if he did it or not, he'd lie.

Dont expect him to cook. If you're eating at home it's just simple cupnoodles, otherwise he goes to eat out for every meal.

The guy walks so. Tremendously. slow. Like, showing off walking all badassly but walking slow like a SNAIL

Has the most annoying morning alarm ever (if he even feels like getting somewhere on time) and takes an eternity to turn it off.

Doesn't include you in his job, but isnt super secretive or apologetic abt it at all either.

He's total shit at talking about his feeling other than "annoyed" and "horny", same goes for consoling you about yours.

When you're not close yet he will most likely leave you to yourself as he has no clue how to deal with it other than letting it pass. He might offer you to do something you like to put your mind off it.

If you're more of a serious (for how serious it can be) thing he will try to console u in his own way. He will stay by your side, most likely uncomfortably staring in the distance until u tell him what you want him to do.

Strangely so, these are the moments where he's uncharcyeristicallt distant. Usually he's a guy with 0 personal space but then he just lets you be until he gets told otherwise (sounds submissive to me ahEm-)

If your just a bit down (and he has outruled the possibility that you're mad at him, so you wont atack him outta nowhere) he will try to cheer u up with stupid dirty jokes.

Nsfw:

Would be into crossdressing. More so himself than his partner, but I can see him wearing a short skirt for shits nd giggles once and realizing things abt himself.

Looooves doggy style. Esp when he tops. He loves watching himself sliding in and out of you while you fuck, it just awakens something inside of him.

Would be the type to push u deeper while youre giving him head.

As an adrenaline junky he loves the idea of fucking and teasing in public. Even better if someone else watches.

Def some sort of sadist. He esp loves hour long edging followed by overstimulation. (I dont make the rules. I do but I dont :)

Loves the idea of phone sex, until he gets too horny and wants to do it himself.

But moments like those r the easiest moments to dom him. Yes, he's a switch, a brat for sure.

Even if he doesnt like to admit it, during spicy time is the only moment ur allowed to order him around and having a chance of him listening.

Dont overdo it tho, if he doesnt feel completely at ease w u yet he'll snap right out of it again (esp when he was planning on domming) and rail u even harder.

His rythm is slow and teasing at first, trying to tick you off, but as his own high nears he rams into you with short but quick thrusts.

Continues to fuck you even after you both came, enjoying the pain it gives him and the strangled moans and grunts tou let out.

Loves it when you beg. He loves feeling superior and being worshipped.

Though when hes subbing. Degradation kink. Im telling you. D e g r a d a t i o n

Hes not a gentle guy, he get turned on by seeing your tear stained face. He'd lick off the drops while he's pounding inside of you, wishing you'd cry more.

When he praises you he'll always degrade you at the same time, often using degrading nicknames. "Such a pretty slut for me" "This pathetic doll is taking me so well, aren't they?"

Loves when you bite and scratch him. It sends him straight over the edge when you scratch his back while he's fucking you.

Especially when he's bottoming he loves it when you leave bite marks allover him. On his neck, hut also his inner tighs make him weak in the knees.

You can bite down pretty deeply. If it draws blood, he'll slightly spread his legs further for you to lick it off.

Loves it when you moan around his cock.

Def a hair puller while recieving head, bobbing your head forcefully up and down making you gag.

He asks you to show your tongue after you've swallowed.

Loves calling you "my good slut"

Enjoys having his hands tied back while you ride him. He loves the way you body bounces while you move atop of him while he strains his hands in his cuffs.

He loves when you use him, ignoring his needs and pleasuring yourself.

The idea of his partners useing him while he's tied up and gagged, unable to stop them from edging and overstimulating him. One on top of him and the other eyeing them like a predator. Man that's maybe even better then drugs for him.

He loves hunting. Whether it's chasing you in a haunted house before taking you against the wall or you chasing him before making him crumble under your fingers.

Even though he's a shit, he knows the importance of knowing what your partner wants, and he'd make sure to get to know your prefrences beforehand. After all, what fun would it be if you're not up to do what he wants?

Aftercare after quickies is rare but when you have played a scene with him he will help you clean up and ask you about your opinion of the scene.

He knows no personal space. He cuddles with you until you both fall asleep, but leaves in the morning after showering and eating. (ofc depending on how close u are. If it's just a one night stand he leaves for sure, unless u put some magic on him. If youre more of a regular thing he'd make himself comfortable until u wake up and leave afterwards)

I have no clue how many words this is, but thank you for reading! :)

IHis lips also look so pink and juicy in the newest chapters, did he buy him some lipgloss or smthh?? I love itttt

[fipindustries]

HRT and sex talk! feel free to ignore if that is not your jam

for whatever reason my hormones are not being as effective as they used to, which means that a lot of my male characteristics are coming back. chief amongst them is my male libido.

i wrote extensively about this phenomena in the past but i want to take a chance to kvetch about it yet again.

the pros is that masturbating feels like it hits... stronger. there is a certain feral high to male horniness. orgasms feel more like he final period, the last word. once you cum the matter is decidedly settled. it has a faster and higher peak. porn, drawn porn, feels more tittilating, fapping is easier. the whole process is more streamlined and hits more clearly and focused. also boners dont hurt as much any more.

that is about it for the pros. they are nice and i have been taking advantage of them now that i have the chance.

now come the cons.

male libido fucking sucks. it fucking sucks dick and balls and i fucking hate it, holy fucking shit.

ive likened to having an adiction in the past and the comparission holds stronger than ever. now your day is circumscribed by masturbation time and by how much time until next masturbation. it is a constant buzz in between your legs and the back of your head. any moment of boredom or inactivity is a moment that could be dedicated to that. to make matters worse, my dick is on a fucking hair trigger. is like im on a semi permanent half chub. i used to be able to enjoy and appreciate porn in a very intellectual way. it was tittillating for sure, it fulfilled a prurient interest, but mainly i enjoyed the artistry of it, i enjoyed the concept presented. now seeing porn online is like getting a poke from a really annoying mosquito that makes me want to scratch the subsequent itch.

and the real kick in the nuts here is that masturbating is now grosser. i cum more, it smells worse, it gets all sticky, i feel sweatier and slimier afterwards, and the dick feels all swollen and sore. the result of all this is that now im much more aware of my penis in a way that i really rather not be. when i go outside i cant help but feel that is really noticeable, more than usual. im terrified that there might be stains or that people might be able to smell something or whatever.

is just a fucking hassle, i dont want my mind to be 10% on sex at all times, i dont want to feel all sticky and smelly, i dont want to even be aware my dick exists most of the time. this truly was one of the hidden blessings of HRT i hadnt anticipated way back when i first started transitioning. i cant believe i lived like this for 25 years, i really dont understand how i did it. i cannot understand how men deal with this all the time, what are you guys doing? are you ok? you need help??? how can you live like this????.

honestly it doesnt feel like dysphoria, i dont feel gross in a metaphisical sense or like this challenges my identity or my conception of self or like it invalidates my gender or like it makes me dissociate from my body. is just a stupid pain in the ass, is like being with constant allergies and your nose was perpetually runny and you were oozing snot and slightly teary eyed and had to be constantly blowing your nose. it just sucks.

im going to talk to my doctor about increasing my dosis and probably get a fucking orchiectomy, yeah masturbation and orgasms dont feel as good but at least i can live my life like a functional human and focus on the things that really matter

[transsexula]

Something that really grinds my gears is how anti-sex work people will search out the worst stories about how a production company drugged & abused some poor worker, violated her consent, etc etc etc—

And not consider that this is just capitalism working its magic. You cant tell me this is the ONLY industry that has really horrible corners.

I could tell gruesome stories of worker neglect and abuse, even down to the sexual nature- and a lot of these stories come out of just. "Regular" jobs. The way shit is structured right now, it's all built against the workers.

If they can get away with it, your job at whatever fucking company would happily exploit the fuck out of you if it meant raking in more money for the big boss and their shareholders.

Workers need to be able to report shit when it happens to them. Workers need protections. Workers need fair wages. Workers need the ability to say no. Workers need the ability to leave their job when they want to. Because otherwise creates an environment ripe for exploitation.

Sex workers are, unfortunately, a prime example of what happens when a class of workers gets denied protections and rights, and are instead forced into dark corners with no means of protection but what safety nets THEY can build themselves. If you've heard a horror story behind the scenes type thing from a porn star, I promise there's more happening to workers who arent part of the porn industry.

It isnt porn, or sex thats doing the harm: its the Industry portion you should be having issue with. Even if you dislike, or feel uncomfortable with porn- recognizing that some people do in fact want to do it is important. These people, and the people who HAVE been victim of that dark corner, deserve the safety to make that decision for themselves.

If you believe in bodily autonomy, feminism, the right to risk, and workers rights, then you should advocate for sex workers. I don't know how one can claim to support these things while also creating the conditions used to further strip them away from sex workers.

I get that there is a disgust factor, but still, you really cant remove yourself and your feelings from this enough to see that someone may enjoy making that type of content? I personally would be in a living hell if I had to scrub toilets and public bathrooms all day every day. But I've met people who have absolutely enjoyed their jobs making public restrooms usable and sanitary. How do they enjoy that when i personally cant dream of being okay with that job?

Its physically demanding. It smells weird. Its kinda gross. You dont know who's bodily fluids you have to deal with. Yeah I really couldn't do that. Plus what does it matter if THEY enjoy doing it? I read this interview from a janitor who HATED his job, he couldn't leave due to a contract he signed, and the other people in that building? Horrific. Inconsiderate. Smearing shit on walls, ripping down mirrors- it was so horrific that at one point this guy couldn't go into work without getting high, and staying high.

........ but. Is it okay for me to strip the rights of janitors because I personally would feel icky doing that job? Because there have been horror stories related directly to what the job entails? Or maybe. Just maybe.

Would all of this be fixed by making sure the guy in that horror story has the right to leave? To say no? To go to someone and say "hey I'm being mistreated: my working conditions are horrible, I'm not being paid well, I dont feel safe" and actually have something done about it?

Idk. I think that would go a long way in making sure the dark shit doesnt happen, or can at least be addressed.

[lafiametta]

Yea I agree with you regarding Ani falling properly for Igor. This might be TMI but I think maybe them reinitiating a physical relationship might help her fall more, even if she thinks it's just a physical release. Like she'd make up super clear it's JUST sex, and he'd be ok with that (he's in love but I think he'd just be happy to be with her on her terms) but even if its not perfect she'd gradually realise that she doesnt have to fake anything with him and he actually cares and ohgodnoidefinatelydontlikehim (also I love how every fic of them getting together has him going down on her first, like we just KNOW).

Honestly, I think a small part of her has some small feelings for him (the look she gives him when he's lighting the cigarettes has just a hint of longing for something) but she hates that and tries pushing him away more as a result (though she is still mad at him for the home invasion stuff, it's a convenient way for her to go 'hey you're shit person so i DEFINATELY dont like you') Even then, actually falling in love would freak her out even more, but I think they'd be ok, or i hope anyway.

Yeah, I totally agree. Entering into a physical relationship, even one she claimed was just for fun, with no strings attached, would be pretty likely to engender a deeper emotional connection. Because what makes it different with Igor is, as you said, the fact that she doesn't have to fake anything — she no longer has to perform desire, as she did with Ivan and other clients. She can simply feel it, and he's also very invested in making sure that sex is enjoyable for her. (Seriously, do you think Ivan really cared if she actually came? I suspect she faked all those orgasms with him and he either didn't realize or it didn't really matter to him.) And, yeah, every fic has Igor going down on her first because she fucking deserves it for all the times she's had to fake it. (Plus, Igor's so obviously a service top.*)

*Is this a term you can use for straight dudes? I hope so, because I think it describes him perfectly.

Ani would be in such denial, though, of course. “Yeah, we're just fucking, it doesn't mean anything. So what that I let him keep some extra clothes in one of my dresser drawers? So what if I secretly check my phone all the time at work, thinking that he might have replied to my texts? He's just some guy, you know, that I let sleep in my bed with me enough times that it feels empty when he's not there.”

I also love that little look she gives him when he gets on his phone. She's thinking maybe she pushed him too far or insulted him one too many times and now he's going to withdraw and ignore her. There's a bit of disappointment, because there's a part of her that does enjoy the bantering, which she can't really do with anyone else. But, yeah, when he comes back and tries to engage with her even harder (about the meaning of her name, gah), she's like, nope, never mind, I don't want to talk to you, fuck off. There's clearly some conflict about how she feels about him, which could only come about if she's moved away from straight-up hating him (as she did immediately following the “home invasion” scene). She would definitely freak out with the realization she'd fallen for him, but like you, I'd want to hope that she'd figure out what she had in him before it was too late.

[starpiastri]

Hi!! For the trope mash up I'd love to see your take on time travel + soul mates for Sewis

on ao3 here!

heheee thank you for this i got far too carried away - its under the cut but it might be easier to read on ao3! its late here so if there's mistakes you dont see them oops.

seb centric, the vague idea is that in every version of events lewis is there and they will always be together. sappy evil love shit

i really hope you enjoy!

this is rated t for brief allusions to sex!

maybe tomorrow you'll know

The voice asks him, what do you wish for most in the world? It asks Sebastian in 2009, champagne soaked in the aftermath of a beautiful Japan podium with Lewis Hamilton and Jarno Trulli. Sebastian answers the voice plainly; I want to know. 

The first place it takes him is only a year in the future - the top of the podium in Abu Dhabi. He only confirms it as his body turns around and reads the back panel but there’s a kind of instinct that thrums through him, a knowing. He’s a Formula One World Champion. There’s much more champagne and it’s soaked into his bones. 

This part isn’t really important, says the voice. But I wanted you to know.

Thank you.

The world moves in slow motion, so he drinks it all in. His body turns to the side and he’s face to face with Lewis Hamilton again, as though it were still 2009, and Lewis was pouring 2009 champagne down his 2009 back.

Lewis is close, leaning in and whispering something in his ear. 

That is the only thing, laments the voice. I can’t let you hear anything, it’ll impact what you do in the present day. Sorry about that. 

It’s okay, says Sebastian, maybe out loud but he doesn’t feel his lips move. 

He doesn’t really feel anything at all, except bright, shining happiness. Lewis grins at him, so cheerful, brown eyes full of warmth. His face is soaking wet as Sebastian feels himself lift his own arm up, and pour more champagne over Lewis. He blinks it out of his eyes and smiles even wider.

The image before his eyes changes. It’s a crowded, flashing room, and oh no, the vision isn’t coming into focus. Sebastian’s drunk. He’s aware of himself in this state, at least, but he can’t prevent anything from happening, trapped as though in a roller coaster seat - voluntarily releasing control.

This entire thing feels like drunk memories, actually.

The voice doesnt laugh. Hm, that’s funny. You can’t interfere, I’ve made sure.

Okay.

Someone claps him on the back, someone pushes him to the dance floor, there’s hands all over him and he’s being torn in one direction or another. It’s violently overwhelming but, he supposes, he’s drunk. He hardly cares.

He feels a hand take his, the first of all the hands to do so, palm meeting palm, sweating onto another’s skin in an oddly intimate way. It pulls with a newfound strength and out of the crowd Sebastian goes, tucked into a corner. It’s Lewis Hamilton. He’s biting his lip and looking nervous but the way he stands, on a sort of lopsided tilt, tells Sebastian he’s drunk too. So anything they both say or do hardly matters. 

Lewis keeps a hold on his hand. Sebastian squeezes Lewis’ hand back, and then leans in so close to his face it’s ridiculous. And then he kisses Lewis square on the mouth.

Again, autonomy, and so Sebastian can’t taste the drink on Lewis’ tongue but he can feel his lips, his hand still in his. It’s tender and it’s sweet, for how intoxicated they are. Maybe if it were Sebastian’s own body, he’d feel fireworks, or sparks, or some other explosive feeling, but he only knows the vague but brilliant happiness that stretches through him, head to toe. It’s like his conscious mind doesn’t have room for any more.

You’d be right. 

Oh, really? 

Yeah. Sorry, though. I have to show you every version of this, though. To make it fair. 

Sebastian might’ve frowned in confusion but instead he says, alright then. 

So, the vision changes again and instead of being on top of the podium he’s below. Mark has taken the top step. Mark’s a world champion. Instead of the relentless joy from before, the feeling is misery, entrenched in his skin not by champagne but by Rocky’s face in his ear, saying something Sebastian still can’t hear. He probably can’t even hear it in the real, living moment - the crowd’s mouths move as though they are yelling and chanting and cheering.

Sebastian’s aware of an ache in his leg. Maybe he crashed out, the pressure building and building and finally he toppled. It doesn’t sound like him but it sounds like an explanation.

I should’ve done this one first, really.

It’s okay, I guess.

His eyes close, as if it hurts too much. Maybe the leg, maybe the view. He’s sure he’s said his congratulations to Mark. He’s sure.

Luckily the whole place swims away before Lewis can tip a bottle over Mark’s head. He’s back in the room with the flashing lights and colours, now, but instead of being in the throng of people, tossed around like a ‘pass the parcel’, he’s in the corner, drink half empty in hand. Mark seems elated. You would be, wouldn’t you, if you were the World Champion?

His vision is still blurry, though.

Instead of pulling Sebastian out of the mess, Lewis walks past him, this time. Rather than giving Sebastian a smile, his usual grin, the gap in his teeth that makes him look so boyish and sweet, he puts a hand on Sebastian’s bicep, leans in, says something that is probably ‘sorry’. The same kind of nervous energy as before radiates from him - his feet are tapping, he rolls his shoulders back and forth a couple of times. He’s anxious about something, and if only Sebastian could hear! 

But before he can begin to lip read, Lewis leans in, and presses a kiss to Sebastian’s mouth, suddenly as if his brain was going to stop him. It’s the same as before - tender, kind. Safe and warm. He knows it. 

Oh. That’s nice of him.

Isn't it? I’ve got to take you somewhere else now. Are you ready?

Lewis pulls away, dark eyes looking into Sebastian’s. He can read his lips. ‘Was that okay?’ And Sebastian knows his answer, even if he doesn’t feel himself saying it, only watching the spread of Lewis’ worried mouth rise into his cheeks, skin dimpling.

He doesn’t see anymore of that scene. It distorts and ripples and suddenly something flows through his skin, some confusing feeling. It’s loss. It’s pride. It’s happiness and longing, all at once, as is revealed to him as he’s sat on the step of a podium balcony, looking up at the sky. There’s tears in his eyes, his cheeks are wet as he touches them with his hands. He doesn’t know why he feels all these strange things, until he looks downward for a second, and sees his racesuit is bright red. 

Oh!

He looks back to the sky, and some things fall into place. He’s a driver at Ferrari, it's all he’s ever wanted. But then, what’s this bittersweet feeling? He can’t figure it out. But, he feels an arm wrap around him, and it’s Lewis. He looks older, here, though his body doesn’t turn to check the date. He wears white and an obnoxious turquoise colour, rather than the white and red of Mclaren.

Sebastian keeps on crying, and he doesn’t know why. Lewis sits with him the whole time, and somehow he’s aware of his eyes always on him, watching, waiting. For what, he’s not sure.

A scene shift, without the voice commanding, so it must be a continuation of this same life. It’s of a dimly lit hotel room, Sebastian’s own, surely, with the Ferrari cap slung on the vanity. He sees himself in the mirror, and it’s a quaint feeling - a body that isn’t yours yet. His hair is a little darker, maybe, he’s got some kind of facial hair too. He looks broader but better for it. He shines. It’s a thrilling feeling to know this might be a future he inhibits, one he lives through. 

He stops looking at himself, turns to face the other person in the room. Which is. Lewis? Lewis, with his shirt off, grinning like a madman. He says something and Sebastian feels something new run through him, something hot and dangerous. He drinks in the sight of Lewis, and he can’t tell whether it’s the present him or the new him. His tattoos look good painted over his muscles. And of course, he’s seen his Lewis with his shirt off, changing rooms are small before you’re in F1, and even then, there’s glimpses of skin when overalls are unzipped. This is new. This is deliberate. 

The future Sebastian reaches a hand out, trails down Lewis’ sternum, and he blinks slowly, surely enjoying the feeling. Desire grows, spreads through Sebastian’s body to his fingertips. It may be selfish but the voice could leave him here, to gaze at whatever happens next.

Can I show you the other version?

I suppose.

The vision changes. This time, he’s standing on the top of the podium, and it’s Abu Dhabi. He knows the view from the podium well by now, and as he faces the back to spin for a photo, it’s 2015. Red fireworks light up the sky and yet, he’s still crying, teeth biting at his lower lip as he lets all the emotion pour out over him, over every spectator, over every star in the sky. He runs to the edge of the balcony. His gloved hands grip the metal railing as he leans over, lifts one to wave down to the crew, wave down to the car, even, the beautiful red machine. He’s won a World Championship for Ferrari.

This isn't fair. How will I know which one happens? What if I want this one more?

Sorry, Sebastian.

It’s the first time the voice addresses him by name. There’s a lingering doubt but when a hand appears on the small of his waist, it’s Lewis again. His eyes are shining and his damn smile. He’s got his cap on backwards and he looks unbearably charming. He’s handsome, some boyish charm replaced by that of a man’s handling of himself. If it’s possible to blush in your subconscious, Sebastian, watching through a possible future him’s vision, he does so. Lips read ‘Well done, man.’ Pure, childlike glee is all over him - he’s done it, and Lewis is by his side.

Snap. The picture changes, just like that, and it’s that dim hotel room again, not the same, but similar anonymous, abstract paintings, beige furniture, popcorn ceilings. Sebastian is looking at himself in the mirror again, and next to his Ferrari cap is a trophy that is glittering in gold. When he spins, it’s Lewis again, who leans in and tells him something, assumedly the same thing as the previous imagination. The previous future, he reminds himself. He’s going to be a Ferrari World Champion.

I’ll have to stop, if you make predictions.

I didn’t know that was a rule?

Well it is. And anything else the voice says is drowned out by Sebastian admiring Lewis again, committing the vision of his perfectly shaped body to his memory, to take back once his wish is over. He never wants it to be over.

Let’s move on, I don’t think this was a good idea.

Spoilsport, but Sebastian doesn’t say this to the voice. Instead, he blinks, and he’s in the car. He’s behind a Mercedes, his brain knows this, and it's a yellow flag, which explains why they’re going unbearably slow. Suddenly, the front of Sebastian’s car touches the rear of the Mercedes. Has the driver just brake tested him? What a prick. His own action shocks him, though. He pulls out, during the safety car, no less, and bumps the side of the car, on purpose. One hand in the air the whole time, waving indignantly. It’s surprising and it’s a little nasty but also, subconsciously, Seb thinks he’d do it if it were his 2009 self in that car right now.

It’s a weird thought, if he lingers on it. This might be him, in reality. In a distant future, this could be him, bumping into the side of a Mercedes because they brake checked him. And god, wait. Is this Lewis? Nico was the other on the podium when he was crying, in the same attire as Lewis. It’s not a Nico move really, but it hardly feels like Lewis. His blood runs a little cold at the prospect.

He assumes, however bad and naive that might be, that he and Lewis had sex in that hotel room. They got to see the most beautiful and simultaneously the most vulnerable parts of one another. This is really going to ruin whatever’s going on between them. 

A worse idea, then - what if it’s already spoiled? Perhaps they have some bitter rivalry, some horrid, toxic thing that drives them apart, and that’s why Lewis did it, and that’s why Sebastian did it, and they’re never going to be nice to each other again-

I don’t know if this is beneficial for you.

Sebastian’s vision cuts to black, just for a split second, and the scene happens all over again, like a highlights reel. The bump on his car, the acceleration to swerve out and into the Mercedes in front. It’s torture, having no control over it all, a passenger in his own future body. He wants to jump out, and maybe he won’t stop it but he’ll just ask, why? Why did we do that? 

This isn’t right, can you- can you make it go away?

There’s a bit left, Sebastian. Hold on. Sorry.

They’re now in the press conference room, staring at an array of cameras and journalists. There’s some Sebastian recognises, looking a little grey around the edges now. It’s strange to see other people’s future too. They must ask a question because Sebastian nods through it, his subconscious wincing at the flashes of light directed straight at him. There’s one reassuring thing, then - he gets used to the feeling and doesn’t flinch anymore, and, he’s still got a job after whatever occurred between his car and the damn Mercedes.

There’s a lot more journalists than usual, though, that’s to be expected after a stunt like that. When he looks over the rest of the panel, there’s a blonde driver he doesn’t recognise, and there’s Lewis, separated as if they’ll kick off and squabble like children if they’re sat too close together. It must’ve been his car, then, not Nico’s. The realisation makes his stomach churn. But then some journalists get up, and then more, and the other driver kicks his chair out and walks off as if he’s exhausted. It must be over, then. Sebastian can only imagine it was painful. 

Lewis looks at him, tilts his head, something too fast for the Sebastian watching to catch and translate. The room is nearly empty. Sebastian can feel the general presence of Britta, and another short blonde woman, donned in a Mercedes polo, talking by the door. Must be Lewis’ Britta, maybe. They’re waiting for them to leave, but all Sebastian wants to do is to jump into this timeline and fix things. 

Or maybe, things are okay already, as Sebastian takes one look around, and offers out his hand. Not in a handshake, but as though reaching for a friend. For a lover. Maybe for just someone he trusts, and Lewis takes it. As soon as he does, it’s like a wave of relief crashes over Sebastian, drowning him in the best way possible. He feels cleansed when Lewis strokes his thumb, feels so much lighter when he squeezes and shouts something to his assistant, who’s laughing with Britta. God, they must be stupid, and worse than that, so obvious. It makes Sebastian unimaginably happier than before, when he was sitting in that car, thinking he was somehow karmically doomed to watch his own stupid mistakes forever.

How do you feel now?

Better.

Good. There’s two more to go. Are you ready?

Again, the voice doesn’t really wait for an oral confirmation. The Lewis in front of him disappears, and then Sebastian is sat looking at a laptop screen. There’s no words to describe the feeling under his skin now. It feels like the darkest day of his life, though the sun shines so bright it makes a glare on the screen. He’s exhausted, he’s upset, but mostly, if he were to try and explain it, he’s frustrated. God knows what with. If it’s the future, maybe he’s still at Ferrari, and the car isn’t doing well.

I suppose this is cheating.

Sebastian doesn’t know what the voice means, until he watches himself click some buttons on the screen, and open a Word document. This isn’t really his job, if he’s writing a team statement. Usually  he just emails his guys a general idea of his feelings over an incident and they make it media friendly. His hands tap on the keyboard without clicking anything, as if he’s thinking, lost in thought.

Then, he finally commits to typing.

I, Sebastian Vettel, formally announce my retirement from Formula One at the end of the 2020 season. 

He gasps in his subconscious. He’s retiring? But it feels so early, so soon. Something’s gone badly wrong, because how could he want to retire? He’s in Ferrari. He’s won a fucking championship for them, how, why would he want to give up now? 

What did I tell you about predictions?!

No, please. I’m sorry.

We’ll have to move on.

Please!

Cut to black for a moment, and then he’s back. Sebastian’s still in his garden, looking at his laptop. God, this isn’t going to be like the last one, is it, where he sits and watches his career crumble in front of him, over and over? 

He notices, now, a distinct lack of people. There’s a feeling of deep loneliness that follows, an unfamiliar feeling, really. You’re always around people in the paddock, whether it be your pit crew, your mechanics, journalists and fellow drivers. Where’s Lewis? For the first time in all these revelations, he’s absent from Sebastian’s future. It makes him worry a little.

Another thing; the sun is too bright for winter break in Switzerland, too warm when it would usually be icy enough to freeze the garden furniture to the ground, too cold to sit outside. He can’t make any sense of it - he shouldn’t be at home at this time during the racing season. There’s a general unease that surrounds him, accompanied by the same biting feeling of frustration. He watches his fingers drag the mouse over applications and files and he waits in anticipation, for the Word document to open and for him to write his own eulogy, if he were feeling particularly dramatic about it.

Instead, 2020 Sebastian opens something called Zoom, he’s not familiar with the name in his present subconscious. But the new him seems to have the hang of things; he pulls up a list of contacts, scrolls to H. Lewis Hamilton. Another fresh tide of relief. Lewis is still here, in this weird, messed up future.

He’s got a recently answered call from Mattia Binotto in his activity, but neither present day or 2020 Sebastian seem to care that much as Lewis’ face fills the screen. He’s glitchy in places but it’s absolutely him, just with longer hair that frames his face in twists, piercings in his ears and one even in his nose, some more tattoos. He’s not got a top on, and Sebastian must make a joke about it as he laughs and sinks beneath the screen, so Sebastian can only see his eyes. He can tell Lewis is still laughing, corners of his eyes crinkling. It must cheer Sebastian up a hundred times over - he can feel the anger easing and fading the longer Lewis is on screen.

I can’t let you watch it all.

I know, but. I like it here.

And he does, even if he’s still received terrible news in this timeline. Lewis’ lovely, smiling face has made it better, if not all of it then at least the fresh pain that hurts the worst. Their conversation turns serious at points, both of their faces frowning and then speaking. At the end of it, though, when Lewis waves goodbye through the screen, smiling his usual smile, little gap in his front teeth, he feels marginally better than before. He so hopes this is the right one, that this is the future Sebastian chooses.

Although, the general panic and anxiety is still in his future body’s chest as though it’s permanent now, something Lewis’ face can’t alleviate. He still doesn’t understand the weather, the need to talk to Lewis through a funny computer program rather than go and see him in the garage next door.

It’s best not to know until then, really.

Sebastian takes the voice’s word for it. Can you show me the last one?

Of course.

Something about the new scene appearing before him makes it obvious it’s his last memory. He’s at the top of a corridor of sorts, only the walls are drivers. It’s a strange set up but there’s a sense of gratefulness mixed with the humour he finds in awkward situations such as these. There’s a few drivers he recognises, some he doesn’t, as he walks through the aisle. No Mark, he notices, but he sort of expected that; he was a bit older than Sebastian. Although, saying that, there’s Fernando, sporting some kind of mullet, dressed head to toe in yellow. What’s strange is that everyone is very far apart, and he’s fistbumping them all, which isn’t a very Sebastian thing to do. He doesn’t think, since his birth, that his present day self has ever fistbumped anyone.

His gloves are red when they reach to brush another driver’s.

When he reaches Lewis, he’s at the end of the line, with another blonde man next to him that absolutely isn’t Nico Rosberg, Lewis’ corners of his eyes smile like on the video, replacing the lower half of his face which is covered up. Sebastian longs, then, and he isn’t sure which version of himself wants it more - everything’s mixed up inside and out and oh, maybe he’s crying. There’s a strange sense of abandonment that is resting on him; he’s not finished yet. He wants to give so much more, and more than that, he wants Lewis’ arms around him.

Ah. The lines are blurring. We need to move on before any permanent damage is done.

No, no. please. Let me stay here. 

Let me stay here, looking at beautiful Lewis, who’s hands twitch under his race gloves as if he wants to touch Sebastian too. But then it all stops, and Sebastian is back at the start of the corridor. This time, everyone is closer together. He walks down, sees some familiar faces from the other lineup, but the colours of some people’s suits are different. They’re in a different order. There’s two Ferrari drivers in red, rather than just one, but he doesn’t recognise either. 

Sebastian’s own raceuit is green, when he looks down to not trip over a driver’s foot. He wonders if Jaguar has made a comeback, but then there’s Red Bull, and so no, that can't be right. The future is a funny place, it seems.

There’s even one driver that, God, is the spitting image of Michael’s little boy. Bright blonde hair, blue eyes in the shape of his father’s. Everyone’s clapping around him and so his future body pays special attention to the could-be Mick, his present mind trying to figure out if it's really him.

You’ll find out, Sebastian. No more predictions.

Yeah, yeah. Sorry.

He finds Lewis about halfway down, rather than all the way, and while he’s been clapping the hands of the rest of the driver’s, which is at least a little more intimate than a fistbump, he can lean in, properly, for a hug from Lewis. His body is firm under Sebastian’s, solid and familiar. Like he’s been this close to Lewis a million times over. 

And Lewis is the only one he gives such a close embrace to, and it’s such an overwhelming piece of knowledge that present Sebastian feels like crying. He can’t influence these things, seemingly, so his future self holds it together, somehow. Lewis says something, inches apart from Sebastian’s ear, he can feel his breath hot there. This familiar feeling is all over his body now, and it’s absolutely, certainly, love, whole and pure and Sebastian knows it as soon as he pulls apart and Lewis’ eyes are wet. 

He hopes he’s told Lewis. Or he hopes he will. Maybe Lewis has just said it to him.

We’ve got to go now, Sebastian. 

Okay. Thank you.

He takes one last look at Lewis, and he knows, somehow, in a way that the voice would probably chastise him for. He knows what’s right, which timeline is his. And there’s no certainty, when he wakes up in his hotel bed, note on the side from Britta detailing his wild night out that ended up with him blacked out, that it happened at all. Whether it was some elaborate dream, alcohol fuelled.

Sebastian doubts it. He saw Lewis in every single imagination and yet. He knows.

[fite-club]

asexual who is not attracted to their friend: i consent

their friend, fully aware of that fact and chill with it: i consent

some fucking idiot on tumblr: i DONT!

anyways. no one said that sex involving asexuals is "less horny." youre making up a guy to get mad at. defining horny as libido based or attraction based is debatable but i think most people consider it libido based. so, yes, Asexuals Can Be Horny.

that shit about treating people as sex objects is so infantilizing. as if people cant discuss their attraction and/or lack thereof as adults and still consent?

"do you want to hook up?"

"im asexual so i dont experience sexual attraction, but if that doesnt bother you, sure, sounds like fun."

"cool, i dont mind. lets fuck sloppy style"

woah crazy how easy that was 💯

and you dont even really NEED to do this for something like a one night stand? like if youre hooking up w someone at a bar and both of you intend and consent to it to be a one night only situation, what does it matter if youre asexual or not. why do they need to know that. what does it change. how does the presence of attraction deem it NOT using them as a sex object, but the lack of attraction is? two entirely identical scenarios, the only difference being asexuality.

its really pretentious to act like youre some kind of expert on sexuality.

i'm not making up a guy to get mad at, you're the guy. you think your sex is less horny because you think it lacks sexual attraction somehow. horny asexuals masturbate, they don't have sex with other people.

if someone says "wanna hook up?" and you say "i'm asexual, but sure, sounds like fun" then you are associating asexuals with people who can want and enjoy sex. actual asexuals are BEGGING you to stop doing this, because they want people to hear "i'm asexual" as "no, i don't want to have sex with you." that's why it matters if you're asexual or not; because asexuals don't want to have sex with other people (because they don't experience sexual attraction). the fact that you're both consenting isn't what i'm trying to argue against, i believe that everyone is consenting to sex in these scenarios, and that's exactly why there is sexual attraction involved. people who do not experience sexual attraction DO NOT WANT TO HAVE SEX. why would they?

i'm not claiming to be an expert but like, i sure as hell understand sexuality a lot better than you do!

[teddy-the-queer-wizard]

actually more on this

i love shipping and i even love taking certain ships that squick people out seriously

like okay narrow down the thing that bothers people and express it in that way and that can be compelling or necessary too

like. i think having sex with children is wrong.

outside of that leaves a lot of nuances that i dont care if people agree with me

however i have read a fic that completely agrees with that premise and still includes fucked up shit about that topic that im glad i read

and while i do not in anyway care if people are writing fictional porn of fictional children having sex

even though its not my thing i wanted to read something that took that subject seriously and see what the fuck was going on in the dynamics and god knows what else. just curiosity probabably.

but i opened up a fic, the main character was having fucked up thoughts and impulses, acted on them, and rapes the kid. and it was rather horrific in a way that made me sick but even though ill probably never read anything in that vein again

im glad i read it for one line the man character thinks. gone through all this trouble and self loathing of these thoughts and impulses, acts on them anyways and realizes in the moment of action that its just like any other sex. functionally the same thing nothing special about it

and sure the fic continues so who knows whats happening there, probably more fucked up shit to explore fucked up shit

but like it was pretty cool to me that a) it gave me a good idea of "hey maybe dont read things you dont enjoy and make you sick and the second that happens youre allowed to bail thats fine" which had never occurred to me in reading ever

but it also really gave me a lot to think about. in intrusive thoughts or attractions or thought crimes vs actually harming people and whatever.

but it did give me that line to look at and realize that in the end your body cant tell the fucking difference and does not care about what it is that gets you off.

its all stimulation until triggered good feelings dump.

so like maybe your brain is like "only the sleek lines of an m16 can satisfy me" but your body? does not care it just wants to feel good.

and like. if youre not truely harming anyone to achieve that goal its probably more or less fine.

which like. yeah. actual pedophiles are hurting people. beastiality is its own can of worms - horrifyingly litterally sometimes - but in general just talking about people if they can communicate and have the ability (childern don't, a coma patient doesnt, etc) to consent and does so youre probably fine.

if those qualifications aren't met youre probably not fine.

if youre not dealing with real people then it doesnt matter if you're not harming real people with it

and saying a specific fictional ship is valueless because you find it gross or distasteful or try to saynits morally wrong is like a choice you can make for yourself but not anyone else

but honestly even things i dont personally like - like the above - holds value for someone in some form or fashion

so like there's a lot of ships im not into or don't agree with and wont interact with

but i honeslty stand by the right of exploration into it for other people.

i also dont think its any of your buisness if you think the person who's sole attraction is the sleek lines of a m16 is "broken" in some fashion as largely

therapy is to help you fuction better in ways you want to or that allow you to interact with others in a beneficial or neutral (as opposed to harmful) manner

if m16 man isnt putting his dick in inappropriate places that harm him - or others - about it and is staying in his lane and is happy saving up to buy his beautiful wifu and jerking off to targeted porn about it hes not a problem and doesnt actually have a problem

if youre invading m16pornland dot com and hate it there and knew you would going in and try to get it shut down because you cannot coexist with either m16 wifu man existing or his interests/ needs being serviced in some way that isnt harming him or the m16 or effecting anyone else

then id argue you have a problem and might need to do a therapy about it instead of trying to control other people outside of your lane

but honestly therapy can only help if you honestly want help and weaponizing it against people- who need it or not - is stupid

but those are some of my bad takes of the day

feel free to comment if discussion is the goal and not bashing

[monarda-citriodora]

idk i just feel like i will never be able to have society view or treat me the way i want until misogyny is abolished. like, it doesnt matter that i prefer presenting as both a man and a woman. it doesnt matter that i like playing with pronouns or identity or clothes. none of it matters bc ime unless i completely cut off the parts of myself that are feminine or androgynous and engage in the choking, restrictive expectations of what is means to be a man, i'll never be treated by society as the conception of myself that i have in my mind.

there was a moment i remember very distinctly when i first had my entire understanding that i was a man and wanted nothing more than to be male, despite enjoying aspects of femininity, completely shaken to the foundation. it was in my gender studies class where we were got to the chapter about femininity and how women get treated, which was right after the chapter on masculinity, androcentrism, and how men enforce the patriarchy. i had this moment where i was like "why do they treat me like this? i am not a woman, dont treat me like a woman" and i had a holy shit wtf moment for me bc i had never consciously put those concepts together like that.

tbh once i realized that the brain theory is just straight up incorrect and that the sex binary is not nearly as rigid as i was led to believe, i have no clue what differentiates ppl or what causes some ppl to want to transition and some to not. i also have no idea what being a man or woman means outside of the social constructs we've made. like, every thing just seems like a bunch of experiences, ideas, and aesthetics we hodge podged together thru out the centuries and we readjust/retriangulate whenever it's socially, politically, or aesthetically useful. when i brought this up to my professor throughout the semester, she recommended i just spend a lot of time reading novels/research articles and writing and less time engaging with theories on social media lmao. it's been very interesting turning this over for the past year and still not really having an answer

[forestryfae]

“if you haven’t fucked in any way you’re a virgin if you have you’re not?? you can’t call yourself a virgin if you’re not” genuinely confused would you call rape victims virgins or would you consider that lying? i ‘lost my virginity’ bc of rape and categorically consider myself a virgin because i have never had consensual sex that i could enjoy, but i’ve had people say i’m lying by calling myself that which is why i ask

if you were raped you didnt fuck, being fucked implies consent. if you got fucked by a guy nonconsensually thats not being fucked, thats being raped. the main difference being that these are two entierly different things when theyre experienced. virginity is popularily talked about as a consensual act too, and losing your virginity is typically seen as a symbol of maturity and joy and something you wanted to do and looked forward to doing.

ofc theres the aspect where virginity is considered purity and innocence while not being a virgin is considered being a whore and tarnished and so on, but thats religious shit and im not religious + religion should not be the leading factor in a society-wide concept adapted in many different settings + its used to control peoples personal choices through shame + the only people who say that shit are weirdly obsessed with controlling what other peoples choices are, so fuck that.

theres also the ascpect where virginity is not only not having sex but also a lack of experience. you arent a virgin if you have fucked but you can be inexperienced. you dont have to lose your virginity from rape unless you personally feel it applies because rape doesnt involve the experience tied to having sex for the first time. sex is maybe scary or makes you nervous but should be a good experience of trust and fun. rape is violent and a horrendous act of intrusion on your very being.

basically you cant say youre a virgin if you have fucked. if youve only fucked once and lack experience youre still not a virgin by definition, virgin meaning youve never had sex. if youve consesually fucked someone, even if they were shit at it, you arent a virgin because by definition it doesnt apply to you. saying you identify as a virgin is at that point a lie because you have had sex if you fuck someone and neither of you cum that sucks but its still sex, technically, even if it didnt work as intended, so youre not really a virgin

if youve been raped you experienced something entierly other than consensual sex, so you can say youve lost your virginity because of rape if you want but i dont consider rape and sex to be the same act, even if it may overlap or look similar. being smacked across the face during any kind of BDSM because you asked them to do it for example is a completely different act than being smacked in the face by a someone on the street. intent matters and so does whether it was wanted or not.

the sex doesnt have to be PiV either, it can be oral, anal, mutual masturbation, etc, i would probably count clothed dry humping until you cum as a type of sex so youd lose your virginity that way too. anything sexual you do with another person that results in an orgasm, ideally, unless your partner was dogshit or you just didnt cum that time because you were giving a blowjob or whatever.

but i also think virginity is a really silly thing to be obsessed with as well, if you lose your virginity and you wanted to lose it then congrats on losing it, if you just wanted to try sex or youre a casual fucker then congrats on the sex. like literally it doesnt actually matter if it was your first time or not, it doesnt actually say anything about you as a person

the issue is when you lie and say you havent had sex when you have, and you arent doing it as a way to protect yourself (like in a religious setting or cult or just a culture thats very violent towards women). its also an issue if you tell your partner youre a virgin when youre not for like? three reasons?? first of all, if youre inexperienced just say that. youve fucked, youre not a virgin, dont lie to them, just be honest about your experience. secondly if your partner cares that much about whether youve fucked anyone else before them thats a red flag. its fine if its just a conversation topic obvs but if they start asking how many people youve slept with because they need to know whether youre "used" or "loose" or "a whore" or whatever thats not someone you wanna be in a relationship with. thirdly its just weird to lie about that for no reason fourthly if you have had sex you could potentially have an STD or something transmittable and you should be honest with your partner about that. if you have like chlamydia from a previous partner your sex partner deserves to know so they can make an informed decision and not get sick because you lied to them. ofc you can get some STDs without having had sex, like fungal or bacterial infections, but your partner deserves to know about that too. thats probably not as relevant though since thats something inherently tied to health and not virginity.

basically the conclusion is you cant say youre a virgin if youve done consensual sex acts with someone that resulted (ideally) in an orgasm. like. thats the base definition. a virgin is someone who hasnt had sex. having had sex means youve had sex. it doesnt make sense to have sex and lie to someone and say nah i havent had sex unless you are in danger if you dont lie. rape isnt a consensual sex act, its an act of sexual violence that looks similar. you cant lose your virginity from rape. you can lose your virginity from rape if youve been raped and you dont want to consider yourself a virgin anymore because of it for some reason, although you can change your mind about that too, but aside from that the definition just doesnt allow for it to be the same thing. sex needs consent, rape doesnt have that. different scenario

that and also its weird to lie about your virginity if youve had consensual sex because why would it be neccessary to hide your sexual history? why does what youve done with your body in the past matter so much to your partner that you need to hide it? like i still think its really weird to lie to like your friends or people in general about being a virgin but thats also a lot more harmless and doesnt really matter as much aside from like. making your weird for lying about it. but if youre lying to your partnerr about it thats a red flag, either for you for refusing to disclose your sexual history and like whether you have experience or potentially STDs, and for playing with your partners trust. like imagine youre dating someone and they tell you theyre a virgin but after a while you find out they arent. thats sketchy. why would they hide it from you? its also a red flag for your partner because if you have to lie to a person youre supposed to trust about something as inconsequencial as your body count you probably shouldnt fuck that person or be around them that much.

on top of all of that im a stickler for definitions and i just think its bad to water down the meanings of things, if something means something it means that thing. its like saying something is orange because its red or yellow. NOT! the same thing! thats entierly a different thing! being a virgin means you HAVE NOT had sex! if you have you arent a virgin! if you know basic math that doesnt make you a mathematical prodigy! if you just focused on something you needed to do thats not hyperfocus, you just focused! if someone just lied to you they arent gaslighting you! theyre just lying! words have meanings! its fine for language to evolve but words mean things and we shouldnt water down the meanings of old words just because we can! if virginity is a concept we wanna get rid of or alter we should be changing it in a way that makes sense! not lying about whether or not weve fucked for reasons that are inherently sketchy.

so yeah no being raped isnt the same as losing your virginity by definition. also i make all the rules forever so noone can tell me im wrong ever because i think this is how things should work. some people think of virginity as including rape and i think theyre dumb, so i refuse to consider them to be correct too.

[m--rtyr]

My truth is that I read acotar (is that the acronym?) as a joke and I actually enjoyed it like a lot. I feel like the author tricked the booktok girlies into reading a good series by adding like 2 sex scenes 💀. Cause the first one does truly read so booktok like but then the seccond book is like “jk! That guy who was creepy but sexy is actually just evil and a bad guy now” so it’s fun

I've heard so many conflicting takes on it.

Mostly good from people i know irl, hence why i have a copy. i did get part way through, idk why i stopped reading it, but my usual DNF reasons are 'i got uncomfortable' or 'i got really angry at something that doesnt matter....' sooooo.

it might've been her leaving the room when she got told not to bc im pretty sure she does that like 800 times and i just... DONT LEAVE THE FUCKING ROOM SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS EVERY TIME.

I do know the author is a piece of shit, though, so... either way.

[own-tt]

Adrenaline | L x Reader smut

Tags: car sex, smut, L ooc?, L drives a car?, aftercare, language, both L and the ready being horny,

This was written on my phone so I hope you guys enjoy it. Also if you have anything you want me to write. Please send anything I'm desperate 😭

“If we die I'm blaming this one you.” L says from the driver seat. “Yeah yeah calm down will you?” You leaned out of the open window. Trying to point your gun straight at the wheel of the car that was following you.

All you did was steel a singe file, and their chasing you. You aim and fire. And to your success, the tire popped and they started to slow down. You smile and laugh as you climb into the front seat again. Ls face was sweaty and he looked like he was focused on the road infront of him.

“We have more problems so dont rest now.” L says nodding his head forward at the sets of motorcycles. You aimed your gun again but nothing came out. “Shit, I'm out of bullets.” You swore.

L looked around, “hang on.” He said while speeding the car up. Your heart starting beating faster as you passed them and turned, almost crashing into a building. You started to laugh. “Is this funny to you?!” He yelled over the car. You nodded with a grin on your face. L sighed and shook his head, his focus now getting away.

With a couple of experienced turns and multiple almost accidents. You and L lost them. He turned into an empty parking lot and took a breather. So did you.

“Where did you learn to drive like that?!” You panted, the sweet smile still spread across your face. “Taught myself. Do you still have the file?” L was also almost out of breath. You nodded and reached into the back, grabing the file and giving it to him. He scanned it over and gave a nod. “Good job. You did well.” You let out a laugh at his words.

“I like praise from the L. Feels nice.”

L looked over to you. You looked disheveled, your shirt halfway down your shoulders, he realised you wernt wearing a bra. Now why was that?

“Praise feels nice from everyone. Especially your superiors.” You looked over to him. “You think your my superior?” You almost laughed at his words.

“In this case, yes I am.”. “I bet you havnt even fucked someone. I have.” You bragged. Didnt seem like the type to brag about but it was in the moment. The adrenaline was making you turned on, not for anyone specific. But L seemed really attractive driving fast.

“What does that have to do with anything? It doesnt matter if I'm a virgin.” You gasped. “YOUR A VIRGIN.” L looked at you. “This isnt the time or place. We need to get back.” He looked hot and flustered. “No. Now I'm curious.” You said, grabbing the steering wheel so he couldn't drive.

“I always thought the best detective would get girls left and right. Was I wrong?” You chuckled. “What were you expecting. I stay inside all day and solve crimes from all around the world. I dont have time for something as silly as sex.”

“But sex is a good way to relief stress? It's good if your worked up, or full of adrenaline.” You say. L looked straight at you. “Adrenaline you say?” You smile and nodded.

“Are you hinting at something, Y/n?” You leaned back into your seat and shrugged. “Not trying to hint at something, was just curious.” You rested your elbow against the window of the car.

But before you could do anything. Your seet was pulled back and L slowly crawled on top of you. “Adrenaline.” He said in a low voice. Almost like a growl. “I guess I could put this adrenaline to good use. Do I have the consent.” You were in shock for a second but found this a bit funny.

It wasnt everyday you made L ask for your consent. “Yes.” You said. L ducked his head down and kissed you, he quickly separated your legs and placed himself in betwen them.

“Have you always felt this way?” You said when his lips left yours. He did nothing while slowly undoing your pants. He leaned over you and pulled them down.

“These are cute.” He said when putting a finger in the waistband of your pantys. He pulled them and they snapped against your skin, making you jump. He chuckled.

He ducked down and kissed the inside of your thighs. “I thought you were a virgin?” You groaned. He paused before saying. “I am. Maybe I'm just talented.” You moaned as he got closer to the place you needed him. “What do you watch por- AH!” He placed a kiss on top of your clothes clit. Making you moan loudly.

“I wouldn't say I watch porn.” He placed another finger in the waistband and pulled the peice of fabric down.

“Ah isnt this a pretty sight.” He threw the fabric somewhere in the car and slowly unbuttoned his pants. Pulling them down a bit, along with his boxers. He gave his cock a few pumps before aligning with your hole. “You sure you haven't done this before?” You said before L finally pushed in.

The feeling burned for a little bit before it faded into complete pleasure. “L!” You moaned. You tried to find something to grip on and decided to grab his shoulders instead. “Yes.” He said.

“I've always felt this way. I just. Never found a good way to express it.” He tried to say but was cut off by moans. “You feel so good.” He sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

When he felt comfortable enough to start moving, he set a nice pace. It was slow but hard, and it hit the right places that made you see all sorts of stars.

“P-please L!” You whimpered. Your nails scratched his back. He was sure that he was gonna see light marks later on. “Hah!” He moaned again. Speading up slightly.

“A-are we realy supposed to do this?”

“We can blame it on the adrenaline if we get caught.” He said, he bit down on your shoulder to muffle his moans. But did almost nothing.

“C-cumming.” He said, he bit relatively hard and you felt a warm liquid in between your legs. It wasnt long before you came along with him.

He stayed on you for a little bit to catch his breath. When he did he asked if you were okay, and you replied with a nod. “Did I do it to your satisfaction?”

You nodded again. He smiled and slowly got off of you. He looked around and found some napkins. He slowly cleaned you up, making sure that he didnt hurt you. He pulled up your pantys and pants and sat back in his seat.

[coltrainbat]

MASTERLIST

✨Masterlist ✨

READ ME BEFORE YOU REQUEST

Please note I don’t write anything that is illegal or borderline inappropriate. This includes sibling smut, adult baby kink (I dont even know what its called), teacherxstudent relationships and anything else I deem off. I also havent been to high school for many years so even if it’s innocent fluff I do not write HS AUs. If you’re unsure just ask! Can even be anon and if you don’t get a reply to your request then it’s a no. I’m fine with Daddy kink and most sex stuff as long as it doesn't cross lines into over infantilising, acting like an actual baby. 

As much as I’d love to sit in my bed all day and write fics... I have a big girl job and answer my requests in order I receive them (lol OCD tings) and I cant start one until the other is done (again sorry OCD tings). So please note there is a 3 week ish turn around for requests at max. And sometimes if I get a good idea I’ll write my own first cause I have to get it out of my head. But if you want updates feel free to message me or I’ll post an update if I get caught up in life! 

I’m always up for a chat and am pretty active on here so you’re welcome to talk to me about whatever, ask questions or just chat! Please note it’s an 18+ account and if you don’t specify that I won’t reply. 

Ty x

Clover ☘️

Dividers from the brilliant @firefly-graphics 💕

Gifs and images are not mine! 

KEY:

☁️ - Fluff 🔥 - Smut/NSFW 🌤 - Platonic 

🌧  - Tear Jerker / Sad

🌪 - Angst

SERIES: 

COMING SOON: Third Times A Charm | A Chris Evans X RDJ Sister!Reader (description here)

Take Me Home | Nick Vaughan X Reader:

Part 1 -  Meet Cute ☁️

Yes, No, Maybe | Chris Evans X Curvy!Reader:

Part 1 - Chris meets you and has to have you. ☁️🌪

Part 2 - your first date. ☁️

Part 3 (Virgin!Reader) - Chris takes your virginity 🔥☁️

Bubba | Dad!Chris Evans X Pregant/Mom!Reader):

Part 1 - You tell Chris he’s going to be a dad for the first time. ☁️🌧

Part 2 - Protective!DadChris ☁️

IMAGINES/ONE SHOTS & HEADCANONS:

Chris Evans

You’re Mine (Curvy!Reader) - You’re Chris’s FWB and you wonder if you’re the only one 🔥☁️

All Worth It (Curvy!Reader) - You and Chris go public with your relationship. ☁️

Chris Evans Alphabet (Curvy!Reader) - smut implied but mainly fluff. ☁️

Chris Evans Alphabet NSFW - 🔥

What A Girl Wants - You’re a str!pper and Chris wants you for the night. 🔥

Happiest Man Alive - You’re a florist and Chris proposes at the Oscars ☁️

No One Disrespects Chris’s Girl - A journalist insults you to Chris’s face. 🌪

Best Birthday Ever (Curvy!Reader) - You usually dread your birthday but Chris has a surprise in stall. ☁️

Bed. Now. - Finals week has hit but Chris wants you to sleep. ☁️

Boston Boy Documentary - Your segment in Chris’s documentary. ☁️

Can’t Believe They’re Real - Chris is an ass guy but with tits like yours he cant help be obsessed.  🔥

Favourite Pillows - Chris’s favourite pillows are conveniently on your chest. ☁️

My Angel (Model!Reader) - You’re a Victoria Secret Angel ☁️

Because I Want You - Your bestie, Chris gets a bit jealous...  ☁️🌪

Cookie - Baking cookies doesnt go as planned.  ☁️🔥

High On You - You and Chris enjoy a joint together. ☁️

I’m in Chwarge (Blurb) - No one tells you whhat to do besides Chris ☁️🔥

Tik Tok Leggings - You could say Chris likes your new leggings… 🔥☁️

Eat Shit Ransom - You’ve got a huge crush on Ransom 🌪☁️

Pork or Pasta? - You meet Chris for the first time but arent so sure about him... 🌪☁️

Mint Condition - Captain America Roleplay  🔥

Sexiest Girl Alive (Curvy!Reader) - You get hate for your body and Chris comes to your defence. 🌪☁️

Headcanon!Chris Evans - Chris start to cheer his gf up. How? With stupid cheesy pick up lines ☁️

Steve Rogers 

I’m The Captain Now - Taking Steve’s virginity 🔥

Off to College - You & Steve send your little girl off to College ☁️🌧

Family Matters - Steve’s sister dies 🌧🌤 

Roped Up - Steve ties you up 🔥

Soxs - You get Steve a cat to help with his nightmares. ☁️

Prettiest Girl In The World (PreSerum!Steve X Plussize!Reader) - Steve thinks you’re the best even if you don’t. 🔥☁️🌧

Get A Life - Shortsized!Reader working for Bruce Banner as a lab assistant and Steve has a total crush on her. ☁️

Frank Adler 

Disneyland - You and Frank take Mary to Disney ☁️

Put It On My Tab - Frank introduces Female Bartender!Reader and introduces her to his niece. ☁️

Andy Barber

What To Wear (Curvy!Reader) - Andy helps you find a shirt that fits for your date night. ☁️

Sparks Fly - Soulmate AU ☁️

You’re Sick (Blurb) ☁️

Our Home - Laurie shows up unannounced. 🌪☁️

Knock Knock - You surprise Andy at work. 🔥

Lloyd Hansen

You’re Not Sorry - You act like a brat but Lloyd is going to make you pay for it. 🔥🌪

Ari Levinson

I’ll Take Care of You - Ari is married to your sister but he has you on on his mind. 🔥

Neighbours - You get very friendly with your neighbour, Ari.  🔥

Ransom Drysdale

Good Bunny - Ransom wants to explore the hole God can’t see... 🔥

Liam Hemsworth

Nostalgia - You and Liam reunite but its a little different now. ☁️🌪