#L smut

[oatmealwrites]

Catch Kira, NOT Feelings! Ch. 7

Ch. 6 | Ch. 8

Series masterlist here | regular masterlist here

Synopsis: You decide to take the day off to reflect on your mixed emotions while Light take the opportunity to do a big of digging on your history. Tired with your obvious attempts at avoiding him, Ryuzaki also takes matters into his own hands.

Tags: Light is a rat, slight insecurity mentions, Light POV, ex boyfriend appearance, mentions of PMS, L is a little creepy LMAO, references to makeout and steamy previous activities, suggestive ending, french kiss, dry humping, mentions of erections, hickies, jealously, slightly angst if you squint, MDNI, 18+

word count: 10.4k

a/n at the end!

~~~~~~~

The storm from the previous night has died into a steady rain that pats against the glass panes of your bedroom window and a steady breeze creates a swirl of leaves in the air. Rolling to the other side of your bed, you tug the warm comforter up to your chin and sigh, silently cursing your inability to fall back asleep.

Your alarm clock next to the bed reads 7:13am and despite your first scheduled class not until 10, your body seems unable to relax again. Though the time of your lecture doesn’t matter much, you’ve already decided to skip and take the day off from…everything. 

When you first woke up unexpectedly, you contemplated the decision for a few moments before texting a friend in the class that you would not be in attendance. Usually you wouldn’t skip a seminar, but it's the first week of the ‘summer’ campus [despite it technically being spring] and that means it’s nothing but syllabus reviews. 

Thick rain clouds make the morning hours seem like night, and with every light in your small one-bedroom apartment being off, your body seems wired to stay awake against your will. Maybe it’s the long hours of being on the task force, the week of examinations and finals you’ve just finished before beginning another period of classes, or maybe it’s the fact your emotions seem to be on the fray. 

You still promised to meet with Light before the meeting, though you’re unsure if you have the motivation to even show your face to the rest of the group given everything from last night. Ugh. and you kissed him– like… kissed him-kissed him. 

“Aughfp–”

You groan and roll over into the pillow, letting out a slew of incoherent curses as the second hand embarrassment of the moment lingers. WHY did you kiss him? And then on his lap– you tug a hand into your hair and thrash a bit more as a mixture of mortification and self resentment leave you wanting nothing more than to suffocate into the soft cushion of feathers beneath your mouth.

Dying by self-asphyxiation from your own ick would be a death not even Kira could conjure up as your untimely demise. A small dull ache in your lower abdomen pulls your thoughts back to your present state and you roll back over onto your back and stare at the ceiling. 

He’s just a guy… nothing more and nothing less. You’ve been without any action for a while now, so that’s the reason you’re acting like this… yea…

You sigh a little, slightly relieved as you attempt to rationalize the behavior, until the reminder that he’s very much your boss and also fake dating you for the grand scheme of stopping a serial killer creates another wave of agitation.

God, of all the people you had to have the pleasure doing this stupid situationship with, it just had to be him. Ryuzaki may be completely inexperienced in everything for all you know, and on top of that, he didn’t let you go to Aoyama, got in argument with you over it, had Matsuda then Mogi take over trailing Light, and then didn’t even tell you about Mogi’s findings until AFTER something happened. He’s never been 100% honest with anyone, including you, so if someone were to ask if you would still kiss him again… why in your right mind is your gut answer yes?!

“Maybe Kira has already decided on my death and is making me the most irrational and unlucky person in the universe before I die…” You mumble and turn back over to snuggle into the comforter again. 

You’ve asked the universe for too much– wasting all your wishes on stupid exams and concert tickets instead of wishing to meet just one guy in your life who isn’t emotionally constipated. Though realistically speaking, shouldn’t Ryuzaki be feeling the same way as you right now?

Even if the whole relationship was purely platonic and for the good nature of protecting you from the Second Kira, there’s no way he would’ve wanted to go that far behind closed doors if it didn’t mean something more. Kissing him with your hands in his hair, grinding your hips on his erection, sturdy hands on your belt loops keeping you in place… the memory of it makes your cheeks flush.

Though there’s also the second option, that he’s enjoying this weird charade you two are playing because of physical relief. The entire task force is men and the last female agent L worked with got engaged and then was subsequently killed by Kira, so it’s not like the odds are in your favor that he’s looking for something that can last.

Tumbling back over and whining into the pillow, you silently wonder if you should’ve just changed life trajectories and lived a more mundane life. You could’ve moved to the countryside, become a post office worker, and spent your days exploring nature… instead you’re a full time student and employee with a group of men, working insane hours, your friend might be a serial killer who is convinced they’re on par with God, and your most recent physical encounter was with an emo man who is pretending(?) to date you. 

This really is the worst, huh?

Before you can attempt to bury your face into the pillow once more, a ping from your phone on the nightstand pulls your attention and you crinkle your nose at the interruption of your existential crisis. You reach over and grab your normal cell phone and tug it back into your cocoon of self pity and fuzzy blankets.

From: Light Yagami

Hey! Are we still on for the meeting review at 1? There’s a coffee shop I’m sending now that has lunch sets too.

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You read the message over a few times and look up the address before sending a basic approval text and tossing the phone somewhere between the layers of fabric on your bed. Technically speaking, if you commit to this ‘day off’ and call out of the evening meeting for a mental health day, then you really should take the time to try and relax.

There’s a long list of things you’ve been meaning to get done anyways, the new art exhibit across town, get hot tea at a local coffee shop and read your book next to the window, or even try your hand at knitting; the list is so long that trying to relax seems to make you even more anxious. 

After a few more moments of self-pity, you peel the comforter from your body and sluggishly decide to get up and move. Knees cracking at the movement and slight shivers from the change in temperature, you pad into the bathroom to take a quick shower and attempt to reign yourself in.

Hot water and steam relax your muscles, and after completing your usual skincare routine and getting dressed into a casual jeans and t-shirt, you notice the missing university crewneck in your closet.

Must’ve left it at the hotel…

Whatever, you can get it tomorrow– you’re 98% convinced that you will simply be skipping the meeting tonight anyways. Sliding on an old hoodie instead, you finally begin to flick on the lights of your apartment and make your way to the kitchen to start some hot water. 

Even if you can’t relax, you should at least get something done today. You make a small mug of instant coffee and slide into one of the two seats at your small kitchen table before opening the lid of your laptop and searching for Misa’s social media page once again. 

At first glance all of the posts are relatively normal; flyers for upcoming movies, magazine photo shoots, and cute outfit inspiration given her gothic fashion taste. Pursing your lips and filtering through a bit more, you double take at the photos of cafe desserts and beverages.

Scanning through the images, you do a quick timeline comparison and notice that for a majority of the new posts of food items, there are two spoons and forks on the plate. One is obviously hers, but the other setting was placed by the wait staff for her company despite the lack of usage in most of the images. 

Clicking through a few more, you notice it’s the same with shared drinks like milkshakes– one straw bent with a lipstick stain, and the other completely untouched. These details are only noticeable for the past few weeks as well…

Biting your lip, you reach for your mug of coffee and blow the steam away before taking a long sip to fully digest the information. It’s not concrete proof of anything, and with no image of her company, you can’t be certain it’s Light– but the discovery is enough to raise an eyebrow.

Putting the mug back on the table, you grasp your actual cell phone and haphazardly scroll through the contacts list while continuing to glance at the laptop screen. Realistically, you should've checked twice before typing out the message, but with indescribable brain fog you don’t notice the romanized alphabet placing ‘L’ and ‘Light’ side by side in your contacts list.

You’ve never even texted L on this phone, but it made sense to have his contact available just in case you happened to misplace the one he gave you upon meeting him for the first time a few months back. 

Still paying half-attention, you send ‘I need to see you’ without ever confirming the recipient. 

Light POV

“Oooo! And there’s a new boutique that just opened up across the street! Let’s go there after our dinner date?” Misa wonders while laying flat on Light’s bed and kicking her feet upwards behind her in a swinging motion.

Ryuk chuckles and peers over at the magazine splayed in front of her while Rem idly stands in the doorway with a scowl plastered as she watches Light at his desk. Eyebrow twitching from the lack of concentration, the young man swivels in his chair ready to speak when she interrupts him once more.

“And there’s a pop up stall by your university! I can visit you on camp–”

“–No.” 

Misa looks up from her spot in the magazine, Ryuk’s interest on a dessert page showing an apple pie recipe, before she blinks in surprise. Rem watches the interaction but says nothing.

Bringing a hand through his hair, Light sighs and pivots halfway to face his desk once more. “My family is going to be suspicious if you keep lingering here, and it’s only a matter of time before my father and the task force find out about you. Going to campus only makes it more questionable if L or y/n see you.”

She scowls and sits upright, abandoning the magazine and crossing her arms in a sulking manner. “But you promised to take me out this week.”

“Later, Misa. Maybe this weekend there’s a cafe we stop at for a brief snack–”

“–Yay!” she interrupts and hops up in excitement. 

Technically Light also promised you that he would make up for your brief meeting later this afternoon with an outing of some sort– though he’s sure he can think of something to cover his bases later. 

Misa saunters over to his chair and grabs onto the back of it with enthusiasm as she eagerly looks at what seems to be taking all of his attention. Pushing her back slightly, Light returns his position to a list of names on a blank piece of paper, tapping his pencil to it. 

“It’ll be short though– I have to focus on building a better world as Kira, not wasting time on tedious things as your boyfriend.”

Despite the sharp tone and lack of genuine emotion, Misa hums with a smile at the ‘B’ word and nuzzles her head against the back of his; a different ‘b’ word drifts into Light’s mind. She’s enthusiastic despite the early hour– his desk clock reading 7:42am and her arrival to his house was only 30 minutes beforehand. 

He keeps his gaze on the paper, the same list of names as your exes, though this time with available home addresses he could easily find online without so much searching it would raise an eyebrow. Mentally calculating the commute time and remembering if he needed to take any transfer metros, Light stands up and begins to passively collect his belongings as indication that it was time for Misa to leave.

The young woman huffs but stands to the side and allows him to pack his school satchel until a slight ping emits from his cellphone on the corner of his desk. If his arm wasn’t halfway inside his backpack, he would’ve reached the device before Misa sweeped it off the furniture and clicked it open to see the ID. 

She reads the message once before Light can take a grab for it, pushing it in his face when she disapproves of the content. “‘I need to see you’? Who is this girl– and doesn’t she know you’re in a relationship?!”

Light blinks to adjust to the proximity before taking the phone and slightly relaxing that it was you messaging him and not Takada– a harder figure for him to talk his way out of seeing. Though this message was definitely strange…had he not already told you about the plans for coffee today?

Deciding to decipher it without the additional company, he pockets the phone and slings his bag across his chest. “It’s my work colleague–”

“y/n.” Misa interrupts with a frown. “Why is she sending you things like this…?”

Light doesn’t turn around and moves to pat down his pockets for his keys and student ID. “It’s probably something related to the Kira case… maybe a breakthrough.”

“All the more reason for me to kill her.”

He spins around at the suggestion and narrows his eyes as he sees the red tinge of Misa’s irises glow steadily with an agitated expression. “No.”

“Huh? But she’s in the way.” she complains back, standing with her arms pointing in fists straight at the ground in stubbornness. 

“She’s borderline family to my father and her current… ‘relationship’ complicates things. Simply put, don’t kill her.”

Misa turns with a huff at his answer and pivots towards his Shinigami instead. “Ryuk! You’ve seen her, is she pretty?”

It’s a loaded question, both him and Light know it, so Ryuk simply cackles with a gentle shrug and floats over to the young man’s side, ready to head out for the day. “I’m not trying to get involved with you lovebirds hehehe.”

Misa commits the text to memory and silently works out in her own way to deal with this situation even if her boyfriend seems unamused by any methods of intervention. Your name is effectively sealed in her mind.

Before she can protest again, Light heads down the stairs and ushers her out the front door before calling a quick ‘goodbye’ to his mother who brews coffee in the kitchen groggily. As soon as the door shuts, he heads for the commute to the transit line and distances himself from her. 

“I’ll call you before my meeting if things go well, ok?”

“Oh! Yes, please!! Can’t wait for it~” she giggles before spinning in the opposite direction to chat with Rem as the pair split for the day. 

*****

[still light pov]

The commute to Kawasaki Station was easier than he had anticipated, though the morning rush made it a bit tighter than he would’ve preferred. It’s on the same line as To Oh Uni, so it realistically shouldn’t take too long to get back to campus in time for class; though the train ride had provided Light with enough time to ponder your message.

At first glance it seems desperately urgent, but the lack of a follow up phone call or text indicates it’s either not dire or sent to the wrong person. Realistically, it could be you sending a request to see him before lunch– but then why hadn’t you just asked to simply change the time? That left the second option: that you had meant to send it to someone else. 

Walking out of the station and glancing down at his paper scribbled directions, Light knows the only one most likely for it to be directed to was L. If the contact for your ‘boyfriend’ had no change in the nickname or emoticons, it would most likely appear next to his name in your phone, a detail not missed by the young man sauntering down the street. 

And if that was the case, and you did have an urgent message for L, something big must be about to happen; a calm before the storm. Light doesn’t respond just in case you send anything else his way by mistake that could be useful; if you asked him about it later he would simply state he wasn’t on his phone or had believed you were confused about the coffee plans. 

There isn’t too much time to dwell on it though, slowly stopping when the apartment complex comes into view. Keeping the note in his hand, Light ignores the way Ryuk seems to eye the other people in the lobby and heads for the elevator before walking to the correct door he found online.

Pocketing the paper once the destination is verified, Light reaches forward to ring the intercom and gives a slight step backwards for space. There’s a brief pause as the homeowner clicks on the microphone but resigns to opening the door when static is the only that emits from the faulty speaker. 

It’s a man in his late 20s, hair disheveled still from sleep, dressed in casual loungewear who opens the door, exactly the man Light was looking for. He stands tall with decent muscle mass and rubs his eyes a few times to rub the drowsiness away; his voice is a few octaves deeper from recently waking up.

“Ummm, can I help you?”

“Hi, my name is Light Yagami. I’m a student at To-Oh University.” Light does a polite bow and then exchanges his hand for the man to shake, but it hangs unreciprocated in the air.

An eyebrow raised, the apartment owner leans against the door frame in confusion and boredom. “Ok? And why are you here? Do I know you or something?”

“Sort of– I’m actually a friend of y/n’s. You’re Ken right?”

This gets his attention, the man, presumably Ken, straightens up and uncrosses his arms slightly; Light pulls his hand back to his side and looks intently into his eyes. “I want to speak with you about her.”

“Uhh…” Ken tilts his head and looks at the hallway to see if anyone is around and resettles his attention to the man at his front door so early in the morning, “Listen man, I’m not really in the mood to spend my morning talking about my ex…”

As Ken takes a step back in an attempt to shut the door and end the conversation, Light reaches forward to keep the metal open. “Wait!” there’s a brief pause from the outburst. “I’m in love with her and want to make sure you’re not going to get in my way.”

“Hahahaha–pft HAHAHAHA” Ryuk bellows from beside the man, happily entertained and clutching his stomach from the current show before him. “Say Light, you should consider giving up the whole ‘becoming a God plan’ and think about pursuing acting instead hehehe”

Light ignores the distraction as Ken furrows his brows and steps forward defensively, “What? She dumped me. I’m not trying to get in anyone’s way or whatever.”

The information is new and enough to spark further interest. “Really? If you don’t mind me asking… what happened?”

“Well I do mind you asking.” Ken rolls his eyes but tugs a sheepish hand through his hair. “Look, to make a long story short, I thought what we had was good, but she obviously didn’t see it that way. She was more dedicated to her work and thought I was moving too fast– we got in a slight argument and she called it quits. That’s it.”

It’s obvious that there’s definitely a lot more to this story, but it confirms Light’s initial theory that you were in no place seeking a relationship given your time commitments to school and work already. Ken is allegedly, from his memory, your most recent ex– meaning that if you broke off your last relationship to focus on your career… why would you suddenly hop into a new one?

“I see. To be fair that makes sense... I’ve been trying to find a time to confess, but she’s always so busy.”

Ken scoffs and rolls his eyes once more; he stands lighter but still isolating to the unwanted company. “Yea, well when she finds the time to hear you out, let me know.” He looks up at Light and shrugs. “Is that all? Can’t say I’m upset to hear she’s available, but it’s hard to listen to another trying to throw his hat in the ring.”

Light adjusts the strap on his shoulder, mentally checked out of the conversation but entertaining it for the sake of keeping face as a simple honor roll university student. “Hm? You mean after all that, you’d still want her back?”

Ken shrugs and moves to shut the door for good this time, “Yea I mean… you’re in love with her right? You get it I’m sure.”

The door clicks shut and Ryuk howls with laughter as Light ponders in complete stillness for a few extra moments before turning away and heading for the elevators once more. Everything lined up with his theory, that you were not in the market for a relationship, but each piece of information seemed to make him more and more curious. 

Why would you even agree to this staged relationship in the first place? Would you attempt to end it before Light could unveil the truth behind it? What was in it for you besides protection?-- humiliation and embarrassment were evident at every task meeting given by how Matsuda and Aizawa seem to act. 

In all this time contemplating the motives behind why you would be in this with L, Ryuk giggled above him wondering why it mattered so much to Light in the first place.

 Your POV

The meeting with Light is relatively simple and smooth given the atmosphere. Anyone else in the coffee shop presumed you were simply two students reviewing notes, not passing manilla folders containing confidential evidence on the current most wanted killer in the world.

You both sit at a the bar infront of the window, sipping on your beverages and watching the people outside pass in the rain as the conversation is filled with brief mentions of the Second Kira tapes and new suicide notes from prisoners. Anything regarding Misa is omitted, and Light passively accepts your explanations without too much rebuttal on your deductions; the whole moment is relatively normal. 

There’s a slight headache humming behind your eye and shivering slightly, Light looks up from the documents. “Not feeling well?”

“Mmm sorta. It’s fine though.”

You look back down at the photograph printed and take your pen to circle the state of the body while your companion sighs from beside you; taking the pen from your fingers and placing it on the table, he nudges you slightly. “You skipped class today too, why don’t you just sit this one out?”

“It’s like you can read my thoughts.”

Light chuckles but keeps his gaze on you before casually glancing back down at the photograph between you both. Normally you both wouldn’t be discussing such topics in public, but with the small cafe nearly empty and the sound of gentle rain and cars passing filling the air, the moment is private enough to discuss such sensitive material. 

You tugs a hand through your hair and run it down until your fingers toy with the strings of your hoodie, tugging them so the length evens out. “To be honest… I really might stay home today. Is that bad?” You mumble, fatigue evident in your bones.

He shrugs and picks up another document, turning it over to see if there is anything useful on the pack page and slipping into a manilla folder. “Not really. If you can’t think clearly, then it’s best to just recover until you can. No point in pushing yourself if your mind isn’t in the best position to work effectively anyways.”

You purse your lips at the casualness of the answer, but relax slightly at his confirmation. Normally, Light would be the one to play the devil’s advocate and push back, claiming that every moment not spent fighting for justice was going to waste– but in this situation it’s like he knew exactly what you needed to hear. You didn’t propose staying home in the hopes he would talk you out of it, you just wanted someone to confirm your own thoughts and not disagree.

He keeps the last page of an evidence file out and rests his chin in the palm of his hand. “As long as you’re still up for this weekend though; I want to make sure you know I can make good on my promises.”

“Seriously, you don’t have to take me out anywhere just for helping you review. To be honest, I doubt you even needed me to run through this considering how fast you think anyways.”

Light chuckles again and looks down at his watch before sliding off the stool and shuffling the folders into his satchel as you down the rest of your drink to head out as well. He slings the strap over his chest and adjusts his jacket slightly while waiting for you to return the drinkware back to the employee at the counter. 

You both step out into the rain and open your separate umbrellas. “Listen, Light…could you tell them I’m not feeling well? It’s not a complete lie… I just–”

“–Of course. Don’t worry, I’m not gonna say you’re playing hooky considering you really do seem a bit unwell.”

You pause and smile slightly. “Thanks, I appreciate it.”

“Anytime. I just hope there’s no trouble in paradise, as the real reason you aren’t coming.”

“Huh?!”

Of course, right when Light shows signs of being a gentleman and decent friend, he has to act like an ass and find little ways to torment you. Face flush and grasp on the umbrella turning your knuckles white, you wave your hands in front of him and stutter on your words. 

“W-Wait, no! That’s not it..I just…” you can’t seem to find a coherent phrase to explain yourself.

Light laughs at your outburst and shakes his head. “Ok, ok I’m joking– but your expression was hilarious.” He turns around and waves his hand up in a casual manner over his shoulder. “I won’t tell Ryuzaki anything, I promise.”

Furrowing your brows slightly, you watch the man walk away towards the campus as you stand with the soft pats of rain hitting your umbrella. 

***

The rest of the day goes by with a steady cycle of you trying to do more work on the case with the files you have at home, making snacks, attempting to take a nap, and then dissociating while watching people walk along the rainy streets through your window. It’s an upsetting and lethargic loop that only breaks when you notice the time is half-past 8 and your second cell phone shrieks to life from its spot on the kitchen counter. 

Shuffling off your perched spot by the windowsill, you reach for the phone and raise an eyebrow at the unexpected incoming call.

“Ryuzaki? Aren’t you… at the meeting right now?” 

“I could be asking you why you aren’t, but I heard through Light that you weren’t feeling well.”

‘Light’ is said with an obviously cool tone that it makes your back shiver slightly and mentally be grateful that if you’re about to be chewed out for dodging work, you can experience it in the comfort of your own home. 

“Yea that’s right. I woke up not feeling well is all– but I should be back for tomorrow’s meeting.”

There’s a brief pause and what sounds like Matsuda exclaiming how the vending machine ‘dropped two bags of chips even though he only pressed for one’ can be heard reverberating through the receiver. The shuffling of feet and then the click of a door bring a better silence to his side of the conversation. 

Ryuzaki’s silent for another moment. “You didn’t reach out today…Did something happen?”

The voice is soft and gentle, surprising you slightly and causing you to sit upright from your spot in a kitchen chair. Hadn’t you sent a message earlier?

“Wait a moment…” You rise and prop the phone between your cheek and shoulder while digging through your bag and pulling out your actual cell phone; flipping through the messages you realize the message you thought was sent to L was never actually written in the first place.

“That’s weird, I thought I texted you earlier…” you mumble before shrugging and tossing the device back into your bag.

“I never received anything… but what did you mean to send?”

Standing upright and moving to make another mug of coffee, you recall what you had seen on Misa’s social media. “Do you think you can pull Light’s bank statements? I know it’s a bit invasive, but there’s something I want to cross reference.”

There’s the sound of tapping on a keyboard before he speaks again. “Yes that’s fine, I’ve just sent Watari the instructions– but there is something I want to ask you before this break in the meeting ends.”

You set the mug on the counter and slide the sugar jar closer to you before opening a drawer in search of a spoon. “Ok, shoot.”

“Do you know anyone who lives by Kawasaki Station?”

…

The spoon clinks against the ceramic jar and the feeling of being watched makes your skin bump with uncomfortableness. Releasing the grasp on the utensil, you clench your phone to your ear and walk over to the door to ensure the deadbolt was thoroughly in place and peering out of the peephole.

“Yea, I do– well, did. We’re uhhh not really on speaking terms.”

There’s another brief silence. “...I think I can put the pieces together. Is this person a… threat to you of some sort?”

“Huh? N-No! He’s not dangerous or anything… It's just been a while since I’ve thought about him, is all. Feels weird.”

Ryuzaki hums on the other end and types a few things into his computer once more before a brief knock can be heard. “I see, thank you for this information.” He shuffles the phone but doesn’t end the call yet. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

The line goes dead before you can say anything, but the way he ends the sentence in the form of a question leaves a small amount of guilt gnawing at your gut. Though maybe it’s just indigestion.

Sinking in defeat back into the kitchen chair with an array of scattered documents littering the table, you push away your mug of coffee, suddenly feeling sick at the thought of drinking any more. Why were you acting so weird about this?

You’ve had a fair share of awkward events in your life that should’ve prepared you well enough for the questionable state of your relationship with the man… so what gives? Pursing your lips and playing with the edge of a paper, the words mix into a puddle of incoherent jumbles. It’s best to just go to bed and hope tomorrow is better. 

********

Tomorrow isn’t better.

You wake up 20 minutes after your alarm goes off, there's a headache pounding in your head the entire commute to campus, and in the break between classes you notice a new pimple growing on your chin while in the dingy bathroom of the criminal justice building. 

Classes are as boring as usual, and of course you forgot the book you’ve been reading at home, so you have nothing to do during class– not even L or Light text you once. It seems the universe is holding some sort of twisted grudge against you and when you walk to the familiar black sedan to drive you to the meeting, you realize you also forgot to pack a dinner and had to sheepishly plead with Watari to make a quick pit stop at a convenience store. 

Shuffling into the hotel room, Matsuda looks up with eagerness at your arrival, but Aizawa notices the drained look in your eyes and keeps his distance. Plopping your bag onto the floor and leaning back against the sofa, you barely notice the way Matsuda has slid over to sit beside you. 

“Feeling better? Light told us you weren’t doing too well– oh! But we do have new evidence with Misa! She’s–”

“–Enough.” Mogi chides from your other side at the man. “She’ll get filled in as we go, it seems like she's had a long day and just wants some space.”

You lean up lazily from your slumped position and give Mogi a look of gratitude before shrugging at the other man. “Sorry Matsuda, I’m just still feeling a bit out of it still.”

He sheepishly laughs and turns his attention now to Mr. Yagami who sits on the mirroring sofa with Aizawa; Ryuzaki perches in his usual position, staring at you and growing your lack of greeting towards him.

Watari finishes hanging up his coat and excuses himself for a moment before returning with a silver tray filled with a variety of mugs. Everyone takes their individually offered beverages with a brief ‘thanks’; sipping your mug you realize the coffee you’re usually given has been replaced with an unsweetened warm tea. 

It’s not bad, and the warm peppermint taste soothes your soul slightly as you begin to lock-in mentally for the meeting. Ryuzaki sets his own teacup on the coffee table with a soft ‘clink’ of the porcelain against the matching saucer and the group falls into a silence as everyone prepares to resume. 

“y/n asked me to pull a few bank files on Light, which is where I want to start now that you’re here.” L turns to you before watching Watari pass out matching scanned documents containing financial statements of the young man. “I wanted to preference this, Mr. Yagami, so you wouldn’t assume it was an ill-natured act.”

The older gentleman looks up and peers intently at you, a gaze which you mirror with seriousness before looking back down. Satisfied with no objection, Ryuzaki places his paper flat on the table and ushers you to take the lead. 

Falling back into the rhythm of these meetings, you shrug off any awkwardness and pull a highlighter from your bag to mark up several lines. “Now this can be coincidental but…” you run the neon yellow across a few withdrawals. “A few things here are sticking out to me.”

The group leans in to watch your annotations and Mogi raises an eyebrow at your markings. “They’re all cafes? Mm, maybe date spots?”

You nod and take a second color highlighter from your bag to mark the dates; you continue the process until you’ve reached the third page of his bank statements. “Exactly, but the main focus is more than the location, but the dates and price amounts as well.”

The men flip through their own papers, scanning for a pattern when L sits back slightly and takes the cuticle from his thumb between his teeth for a moment before speaking. “I see what you’re referencing– these cafe purchases seem to increase in price and their visitation frequency dramatically over the past few weeks.”

You nod while Aizawa scratches his chin with the papers in the other hand. “So he’s going there with someone? Isn’t that….normal?”

Mr. Yagami remains silent in his position but is clearly listening to every word when you shuffle your bag between your feet to pull your laptop from it. “Yes it would be, but I also noticed that Misa’s social media page has a few posts that would hint there’s a second person with her– there’s no photo proof of who though.”

Pushing a few things on the table back slightly, you scroll down to the first post in the pattern that contains a table set for two while Mogi flips through the bank statements. “The first change in his purchase history was only 4 days before that photo was posted…”

Matsuda sits back in awe and looks among the group. “So…he’s been seeing Misa outside of her visits to the house?”

You shrug slightly and scroll through a few more posts to see if they match the timeline of Light’s bank statements; a majority of them do. “It’s hard to say for sure if it’s circumstantial or not; there’s another girl on campus who seems to be into him.”

Mr. Yagami shifts slightly and sighs at the mention of his son’s love life, though minorly relieved at least Light wasn’t yet in attendance as his evening class would let out in another 20 minutes. 

L brings a small plate of macarons to himself and bites into the sugar dessert. “So we can infer that even if Light is simply a womanizer, it means he has an ability to form intense connections with multiple people without the parties’ knowledge. In short, the ability to live multiple lives.”

“I would prefer you not to call my son such vulgar terms.” Mr. Yagami huffs but doesn’t press further, upset at the thought his son could do something so scandalous. 

Aizawa places the paper down and looks among the group. “Ok, first thing: I’m not trying to defend a guy who might be cheating on his.. girlfriends?” He shoots the chief an apologetic wince before continuing. “But isn’t jumping from adultery to mass murder, a stretch? Even if Misa is one of these women he’s taking out… if Light is dating multiple girls at once, there’s a chance that him being with her is coincidental.”

“It can highlight his own duality as a person.” L cuts in, crunching the shell of the macaron and watching the crumbs coat his thumb and index finger. “On one side he’s a perfect student dating another woman on campus, and on the other, he’s manipulative and resonating with a woman now 90% certain to be the Second Kira. Surely if Light is spending time with her, and he was innocent, he would’ve deduced already that Misa is certainly questionable company.”

A silence hangs in the air and Mr. Yagami looks over at the man with a forlorn look on his face. “What does this mean, Ryuzaki? We have plans in effect to arrest Misa within the next week… what does that mean for my son?”

Heart strings tugging, you frown at the documents on the table and silently wish it had never come to this moment. L flicks a few of the crumbs off his fingers and picks the dessert again to pop it into his mouth. 

“Light will be tested to determine his own interpretation of her arrest, his answers will signify if he will need to be detained as well.”

A pin could drop onto the plush hotel carpet and someone across the city could still hear it; the men sitting around you shift in their seats with melancholic expressions. The knots in your abdomen stir again, and you clutch the pooled hoodie fabric with a slight grimace; when you look back up, you notice the way Ryuzaki looks at you with focus before blinking and peeling his eyes back to the group.

“Though we can cross that bridge when we arrive at it, for now let us continue with our planned schedule for the evening.”

The meeting shifts topics to focus on a variety of Kira suicides and growing online forums that seem to be popping up in when Light finally arrives. He sits languidly in a separate loveseat beside Matsuda and holds himself with an air of confidence that leaves you silently questioning your own disheveled appearance.

If he notices the group's lack of focus on the Second Kira this evening, he makes no effort to show it and filters through tasks as naturally as he usually does. There’s an unspoken tension to the way Ryuzaki perches in his chair however, not fully relaxing and keeping his gaze steady on either Light or you for the majority of the meeting. It’s not like he usually blinks anyways, but the intense stare makes you shift uncomfortably as if he was testing you as well. 

By the time the clock strikes 11pm and the group is noticeably yawning, Ryuzaki calls the meeting to a halt for the day. Matsuda blinks wearily and nearly opens his mouth to make a sly remark as to if you would be staying late but he swallows it when he notices you hastily packing your bag. Aizawa hasn’t even slid his second arm through his coat by the time you jump to your feet and give Watari an expression of eagerness. 

Ryuzaki slithers from his spot on the couch and meanders over to where you stand, ready to speak but making no sound from his mouth, as if he was waiting for you to talk to him first. You adjust the strap of your bag and tug the strings of your hoodie to even out before giving a curt glance to the man at your side– awkwardly realizing that you should probably do something considering the arrangement and audience. 

Coughing slightly, you close your distance to the man and lean forward to plant a quick kiss to the apple of his cheek before peeling back; L stands there in a flustered surprise and blinks rapidly for a few moments from the act. Shuffling to the front door to meet Watari, you throw up an awkward wave to the group and give a curt ‘see everyone tomorrow’ before shuffling into the hallway without looking back once. 

****

Looking back on it, yes, you probably should've had an adult conversation with Ryuzaki last night. You do admittedly feel a little bad about dodging him for two consecutive days now, but it’s not like you had many options to begin with. If you didn’t bring up the problem, then it didn’t exist in the first place! Simple, right?

Ok, realistically the you from a few nights ago would be clawing for another moment locked away with the man, but over the past 48 ish hours your emotions have left you feeling more drained and defeated than horny for physical attention. At least for right now.

You’ll talk to him tonight– after the meeting you’ll ask for better guidelines or maybe even a rule list for the do’s and don’ts if this ‘relationship’ were going to work.

Do: Hold hands in public.

Don’t: Grind an erection into you unless you have the emotional desire to further escalate things and put a serious label on this agreement!

Mentally patting yourself on the back, you stand in your kitchen preparing lunch for the day at home since your afternoon class was cancelled for a ‘family emergency’ from the professor. The sun is shining after days of rain, the temperature is warming slightly, and the radio playing idly in the background makes your life seem more out of a 2000s slice-of-life movie rather than the exhausting mess it’s been recently.

Humming to the music and stirring the pot in front of you, the moment provides you with a feeling of contentment, as if maybe your luck has finally turned around.

Knock! Knock! Knock!

Nevermind.

You frown and look at the microwave clock, all your friends should be in class at this time, before placing your utensil down and padding over to the front door of your apartment. Peering through the peephole for all of 2 seconds, you stumble backward and practically pull the door off its hinges in shock. 

“Ryuzaki?!”

Standing in the hallway of your complex, L stands awkwardly with a baseball cap and sunglasses on along with a long baggy white crewneck; it’s the same outfit he wore on campus when you two…made out.

The memory makes your cheeks flush as you side step to allow the man to walk inside. Checking to see if maybe Watari was with him but finding no one, you shut the door and watch Ryuzaki kick off his sneakers [without socks on] and walk into the small apartment with a paper bag in tow. 

Blinking in shock for a few moments, you sheepishly look at the unkempt state of your living arrangements and swallow half the questions you want to spur on the man. Coasting back to your pot, you lower the heat and raise an eyebrow at him.

“What are you doing here?”

L places the paper bag on the small kitchen table and looks around once before peeling off his ridiculous disguise and takes in the cozy atmosphere of your apartment. “I figured you were still avoiding me and decided to come here directly to save time.”

…

You blink a few times and defensively scoff. “What? I’m not… avoiding you.”

He gives you a stare of ‘don’t even try to lie your way out this’ before padding over to your tiny living room and admiring the details of your living space. “Anyways, I did a bit of digging the same day you called out and pulled Light’s metro card transactions. I want to review them with you now, before tonight’s meeting.”

Picking up where you left off cooking, you face the pot and try to act as nonchalant as you can given the unexpected visit. “Alright, any interesting places he went to?”

L smiles gently at the mess of throw blankets that litter your second-hand sofa along with the few stuffies that seem to be placed in their own respective spot on the cushions. You peer over and mentally scold yourself at being a grown adult who leaves stuffed animals laying around… when there’s someone to catch you. 

He squishes the arm of one of them before padding back into the connected kitchen. “There’s more of a lack of places he’s been.”

You don’t bother responding, knowing he’ll go into more detail, and continue your stare at the stove.

“Every weekday he scans for campus, to the meeting, and then back home– but he didn’t scan to campus yesterday.”

“Hm? I saw him at a coffee shop right by the quad though?”

L nods and digs his hands into his front pockets, obviously getting comfortable in your living space within minutes. “Exactly, and he didn’t scan the rest of the day either. This would usually mean he simply forgot his metro card, but when I compared his bank statements once more I saw transaction fluctuations in single-ride ticket purchases.”

You look up and raise an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“Standard metro fares are calculated by distance, and from his house directly to To-Oh costs roughly 200 yen for the travel. The other day, there were two transactions, one for 180 and another for 150. Meaning he stopped somewhere before arriving at class.”

The phone call from the other day comes back to memory. “Is that why you asked about Kawasaki Station?”

Ryuzaki nods once and steps a bit closer. “I know it’s invasive into your privacy, but I have a theory that Light purposely stopped there to meet with…uh someone you know.”

You don’t need to say the name out loud for you both to know who he’s referring to– your ex-boyfriend. 

Continuing to stare at the pot simmering on the stove with a torn feeling, Ryuzaki lets out a soft sigh at your lack of response and saunters up to stand right beside you. He eyes the content of the pot for a few moments before peering over your shoulder to look along the kitchen counter in search of something. 

“Making spicy instant noodles? Ah, I forgot it was nearly time…so everything makes more sense. Did you also grab a cola and bag of chips to pair with it?”

You keep your eyes on the boiling pot. “Oh yea I made sure to– wait.” You place the chopsticks that were being used to stir the contents flat on the counter with a thud! “How did you know I always pair it with those?”

Ryuzaki stares at the noodles without blinking but the bob of his Adam’s apple from the nervous swallow gives away his guilty conscience. “I’m very observant.”

You cock an eyebrow and tilt your head with arms crossed. “And what about ‘it was nearly time’...?”

The sentence drags off when you push past him to grab your phone from the counter and frantically pull up your digital diary; Ryuzaki keeps facing the stovetop and resumes your position of stirring the noodles and checking the consistency. 

Clicking through the days on the calendar section, your face wrinkles in horror and surprise. “You’ve been tracking my cycle?!”

L peers over like a pet caught with something in their mouth and turns his attention back to the boiling water as if he could ignore the conversation entirely. He picks up a noodle with the chopstick and keeps his back to you. “Would you like me to drain them?”

“Answer me, pervert!”

A pillow you grabbed from the sofa is hurled at him as he awkwardly dumps the contents into a colander and tosses the noodles back into the pot with the spice packet. You move to grab a plush this time, but his quiet response makes you pause mid wind up.

“It wasn’t my intention…I simply noticed there were days you seemed more irritable and uneasy and decided to take note.” He stirs the contents and lowers his voice even more. “By the time I noticed what I was actually tracking, the pattern was too useful to stop.”

You drop the plush back onto the sofa and furrow your brows to recount every instance that he may have used this information. “Wait so… the herbal tea served?”

“Caffeine isn’t recommended for those experiencing PMS.”

“And the seat heater being on in the car?”

“Heat can be beneficial for relaxing cramps.”

You pick up the stuffed animal and throw it again with full force. “Perv! Why are you tracking this!?”

Ryuzaki dodges the attack and pries open your cupboard in search of a clean bowl as if it were the most natural act in the world. He opens the next set and grasps a ceramic bowl from the shelf before pivoting back. “Well, shouldn’t your boyfriend know these things?”

“Yea, well you’re not actually my boyfriend-.”

Ouch. 

The word comes out with more force than you want them to and L flinches at the sentence before resuming his act of pouring the noodles into a bowl and stirring them one last time. He places the bowl at an open spot on the kitchen table before bending to collect the pillow and stuffie from the floor as you stand there with a mix of regret and embarrassment. 

“Ryuzaki–”

“It’s fine.” He cuts you off and walks past you to place the items back on the couch before shuffling to sit at the table in his usual awkward position. “I didn’t mean to overstep. I’ll… just forget everything.”

Great. Now you feel like shit.

Sighing anxiously, you pad over to the kitchen table and sit across from him with a guilty conscience. “No.. I didn’t mean it like–”

“I already said it’s fine.” He interrupts again and begins digging through the paper bag. “This relationship is constructed for your protection… nothing more.”

You open your mouth and close it, feeling wounded from the words; when you look up from your untouched bowl, Ryuzaki sits with his hands extended out holding your university crewneck. The same one you had left behind the night the two you…

“Let me explain, ok?”

L looks up at the untaken garment and places it on an empty spot on the wooden furniture in silence. 

“I just…” 

Yes you wanted to explain, but actually finding the words was much harder than you expected it to be. “I… I like this, ok?”

“This?”

You pick up the chopstick and play with the food, feeling small and embarrassed from your outburst. “Yea, this…us.”

Ryuzaki doesn’t move from his spot, but the dark irises of his eyes seem to soften in relief slightly.

“I mean even if it’s fake…” the word makes you scowl slightly but you continue on, “I like spending time with you and doing this with you, L.”

He stays quiet for a moment and nods in a steady beat, testing the words out in his head as he digests the meaning of them. 

“So… then do you still want me to stop tracking…?”

It starts as a snort from the absurdness of this conversation before you break into a full cackle and run a hand down your face at the absurdity that is your life. “You know what? Do whatever you want– fake boyfriend or real, if you think it’s beneficial, then go ahead.”

You may miss the way ‘real’ slips from your tongue, but L certainly doesn’t; his face flushes at the suggestion before smiling gently to himself and relaxing back into the table as if the open seat across from you was always open for him in the first place. 

“Very well then. I also enjoy doing this with you.” He toys with the hem of your folded sweatshirt sleeve when you finally sit back upright and offer an apologetic smile. 

Standing from your seat, you raise a hand to keep him in place and shuffle into the kitchen for a few moments before returning with a small can of cola– the same one you had planned on drinking with your lunch– and placing it in front of the man.

“It’s the sweetest drink I have at the moment, but it’s all yours.”

Ryuzaki blinks at the gesture with arrhythmia before looking back up and noticing the way you eat casually across from him; with a small ‘thanks’ he pops the tab open and takes a sip.

There’s a few moments of silence before L shifts back into detective mode and taps the table with his finger after placing the can back down. “So now that we know Light is visiting your exes, we have to be especially careful in how we incorporate intimacy to our relationship.”

Any food that was in your mouth is now partially lodged in your esophagus as you cough and choke at the bluntness of his words. Patting yourself on the back a few times and gulping for air, you look up at Ryuzaki incredulously. “Ok 2 things: 1. Maybe ease into these kinds of topics moving forward.”

L blinks but shrugs in approval silently. 

“2. Are we sure he’s visiting my ex? I mean aren’t there other destinations he would visit of equal value?”

Ryuzaki thinks for a moment and plays with the tab of the aluminum can. “No, I’m 85% certain he’s visiting one of the people from your past.”

Deflating slightly, you resign to take another bite of your food while L reaches around to the close kitchen counter and passes you the bag of chips. You begin to offer him a ‘thanks’ before shooting him a slight scowl and snatching the snack from his hands.

You pry open the bag and offer him one, which he declines, before munching. “So what does this mean for us? I mean even if Light is going to them… why would that affect uhhh–our ‘intimacy’?”

Geez the word makes you feel like you're in middle school health class again. 

“He may use it as a comparison.”

Ok well there goes your appetite for the moment. “We really need to work on how you can say this so casually.”

Ryuzaki sits back slightly while you prop your elbows up on the table and lean forward. 

“Light never even saw me and my ex together that many times to begin with– so there’s not many physical things he can compare us to.”

“We don’t know what he asked your previous partner though. It’s possible he wanted to know about dating habits as well.”

This makes you pause and slightly contemplate your own habits when in a relationship; most of them seem relatively normal to anyone your age dating and you scrunch your face in defeat. 

“I don’t really do anything out of the ordinary though...”

“Hmm. So what would that entail then?”

…. 

Right. 

A heat flushes on your cheeks and you stand up once more to pour a glass of water to calm yourself slightly. After draining half the glass and filling it up once more, you abandon the table and awkwardly begin to tidy the blankets that litter your sofa in an anxious desire to clean. 

“It’s just normal couple stuff ya know? Like… kissing, hand holding… the usual.”

Ryuzaki stands up and joins you in the connected living room to fix a few cushions before sitting down and looking up at you with less patience. “Yes, but what matters is the manner in how you do those things. That’s what Light is going to be looking for.”

Shivering slightly, you plop down next to him and run a hand on the back of your neck. “I mean…I’m not super big into outbursts of PDA so what we did on campus was a bit out there. And the most risqué thing I’ve done in public is maybe having hickies visible.”

Ryuzaki nods and bites on the nail of his thumb once before spinning in his spot and leaning in past the point of personal space and looking at your face intently. “Alright, let’s do it.”

You pause and raise your hands in shock. “Wait wait wait. What?”

He looks at you unamused and stares from eye to eye before briefly looking down at your lips and peeling his gaze away hastily. “Let’s.. Do hickies.”

‘Do hickies?’

Running a hand down your face and tugging the flesh under your eyes down from the force, you turn to the man with a cautious expression. “Do you even know what those are?”

“Oh, sorry if my phrasing was off. They’re the bruises you leave on a person as a form of possession, right? Or am I mistaken?”

Forget Kira, this man was going to be the death of you.

With a sigh you nod. “That’s correct. But are you sure you even want to do this?”

“Of course, but it also requires you to be comfortable with this as well.” Ryuzaki looks around the room once more and settles further into his seat. “I know that the lines of this agreement are not particularly clear… but I want to make sure that this relationship can successfully protect you. If its effectiveness depends on moments like this and ones similar to the other evening… I’m more than content to continue if you are as well.”

Looking at him in the eyes again, you can feel the strange hypnotic trance he always seems to place you under takeover once more. Of course you want to do this. You would do this and more at the drop of a hat if someone were to pry the truth from you. 

Pushing your ego down, you lick your lips and nod your head in agreement. “I mean, if it’s for the job, I don’t mind.”

Ryuzaki watches the way your tongue pokes out as you moisten your bottom lip and finds his own eyelids hodding slightly as he leans in closer. “Of course. For the job. To catch Kira.”

You spin on the cushion to face the man, the music on the radio long since forgotten now playing a steady ambience to fill the air as you tug his knees to sit on the sofa correctly. Ryuzaki obeys silently and lets his knees bend on the cushions the way most people would position them, and the image is almost uncanny. 

There’s a few beats of silence until you lean forward with L mirroring the action and connecting your lips in a fervent kiss. The same fast learner he’s always been, Ryuzaki hastily rocks his head against yours eager to taste everything, as if he had been waiting for this the moment he knocked on your door. What’s supposed to be a warm up kiss quickly dissolves into an entire makeout session on your couch as limbs scramble and paw at one another. 

Your hands tangle in his hair and your lean forward to get even closer while his hands tug at your waist to get you seated on his lap once more. Nearly tripping and stumbling over each other to get into a similar position as the one a few nights prior, neither one of you bother to break the kiss. 

Saliva dripping from the corners of your mouths, sweet cola taste lingers on your lips when an attempt to breathe leaves Ryuzaki surging his tongue into your mouth. Groans are muffled by the sloppy sounds of lip smacking, and the rock of your hips into his makes his hands dig into the plush flesh of your waist. 

All that talk and worry about ‘what are we’ is thrown out the window the moment the opportunity to kiss this man arises, and you 36 hours would be shaking her head at the lack of self restraint. 

A few more rocks of your hips against his, you part slightly and chuckle when he leans forward to kiss your lips once more before sinking to lay against the armrest in submission. Pushing up slightly, you trace your hands gently along his jaw and shiver when his breath catches in his throat as you guide his head to tilt to the side. His pulse is pounding beneath your fingertips as you take the other hand to brush strands of dark messy hair away from his neck; Ryuzaki clenches at the cushions and flexes the muscles in his body as if bracing for impact. 

Tutting slightly, you push a final strand away from his throat and lower down slightly but raise your eyes to meet his. 

“Just relax, ok? I’ll leave a few on you first… and then you can do some on me.”

L sighs in a mixture of approval and nervousness as you graze your lips along the column of his throat before resting on the quivering pulse point under his jaw. Taking a moment to enjoy the fresh scent of shampoo in his hair and clean detergent on his clothes, you press a gentle kiss into the flesh before parting your mouth and sucking.

ch.7 is doneeee hehe

this chapter is so long already, that i decided the next one would open with a spicy scene hehe

to be honest, this was really hard for me to write, and i went back several times because i wasn't sure i liked the pacing of everything.

-> i'll most likely go back and slightly edit a few scenes in the morning [im posting this at like 3am my time whoops] in case they look weird to me

-> also this was proofread at like 2am so im definitely gonna give it a few look overs tmr

-> if anyone has seen 'community' there's a scene where Abed accidentally tracks the cycle of other characters and for some reason i felt like L would accidentally do the same thing and notice when the reader would experience PMS

anywayyys

TY for all ur love and support for this series, you guys seriously make my day with ur comments and funny remarks

I LUV U POOKIES

all likes/reblogs/comments are appreciated

-oatmeal<3

tagist: @lechatparle24 @irissfoot @iheteeaifs @automaticpatroltragedy @greenapplesaucepi @thesimpnovao @leiiilaaaa @duckydee-0 @dija200 @cherry-san @hanakokunzz @maribellaaaaa @love-of-less

[s0dium]

Creep

Warnings: Creepy/stalker behavior, breeding kink, pussydrunk behavior, cumflation, stomach bulge, subspace, premature ejaculation, orgasms

~

You know it's wrong, so wrong to enjoy the attention of a creep.

At least, that's what people call him. But through the snickers and sidelong glances that surround him, there's something about him that intrigues you, attracts you, something you can't seem to get out of your head.

It starts off small, letting him eye you from across the room and flashing him a small smile. Then you notice he starts to get bolder, more confident in his advances. As the days pass, his presence becomes a constant in your routine. He waits for you after class, catches you alone in elevators, leans in closer during conversations, and even starts to find excuses to touch your arm or shoulder. Each interaction feels like a challenge, a test of boundaries that seems he's all too willing to push.

In the beginning, you almost listen to the unease flickering in the back of your mind, warning that maybe you are playing with fire. But as the tension builds, you find your resolve slowly melting, small touches on your arm turn grazes against your ass and the quick glances evolve into him blatantly checking you out.

So only you can be blamed for the situation you're in right now. Only you can be blamed for letting it get like this.

His hips snapped so fast you can't think, you can breathe. Pleasure courses through your body in electric flesh arrows and you could feel your pussy clench around his length in a futile attempt to adjust for his massive size. How could a creep like him be so big? Jesus, you could feel his mushroom tip press against your cervix every time he slammed into you. Countless loads of cum dripped from where you two were connected onto the white sheets below. At any given time he'd blow his load right into you and without much of a stutter fuck the liquid back into you, until he reached his high again and started the cycle over again.

"Mine," he grunts out, his breath hot against your cheek from the brutal mating press he has you in. The bed shook with every thrust, the head board banging against the wall from the way your cervix was getting absolutely abused. The friction, the way he filled you up so perfectly, his hot skin against yours, it was too much, too overwhelming, and your brain couldn't handle the pleasure. You could feel the euphoria absorb your body, making your toes curl and uncurl from the sheer pleasure.

"G-gonna cum in you again" He says through a moan, peppering kissed along your jaw. "Gonna fill you up, make you feel so so good." He doesn’t slow his movement, instead picking up one of your legs and throwing it over his shoulder so he can reach even deeper. He places his other hand on your belly, rubbing your skin with his thumb.

"You feel me?" He coos, pressing down on your stomach, intensifying the pressure of his cock inside you and making your moans grow even louder.

"I can feel you, I can feel you squeezing me, feel so good, better than my fist." He chuckles and grabs your throat, squeezing it so your brain goes fuzzy with the slight light of oxygen.

His breathing becomes jagged and with a soft whimper followed by a silent "oh-fu", he blows his load into your battered pussy. There is no warning when cums into you, only the slight stutter of his hips that does nothing to deter his brutal pace. You are soaked down there, his sticky cum leaking out of you as he pushes into you over and over again. But you couldn't be bothered to look right now, you couldn’t open your eyes and ignore the colors you were seeing behind your eyelids. Everything was good - so, so, so good. Your skin was buzzing, mind cloudy, and the only thing you could focus on was the throbbing that was taking over your body.

"You gonna cum?" He coos into your ear, punctuating his words with an extra sharp thrust. "Cum for me, please." 

As if on cue, you gasp, and let your orgasm wash over you. He doesn't stop his movements, instead, he fucks you through your orgasm until your crying for him to stop.

"Not gonna stop, gonna fuck you until m' shooting blanks okay?"

SHIGARAKI, YUUTA OKKATSU, L LAWLIET, SHINSO, KENMA, GYUTARO

[roturo]

SUCCESSOR -`♡´-

summary: He believes he’s going to die soon, and the idea of leaving the Kira case unfinished gnaws at him. The thought of his legacy fading away too soon is unbearable. He needs a successor. And soon.

warnings: A LOT of breeding, smut, unprocteted sex, overstimulation, multiple rounds, pwp, tummy buldge, mentions of cum, mating press, virgin!L, obssesed!L, mentions of forming a family, not proof read and sleepy while writing this. and more.

a/n: ik this is going to have as much support as my other works, but it's def one of my best and favs writings, so please show me your support with a comment and reblog! it means a lot for me!

You've been part of the task force for a while now, ever since L handpicked you for his elite team. As a regular member, you've earned your place and trust within the group. The necessity of keeping your identity hidden has diminished, thanks to the expanding team, but you still opt for an alias during meetings, maintaining a veil of secrecy around your true connection to L.

L’s mind is a labyrinth, each thought of a winding path leading to an unknown destination. His strategies are always a step ahead, his deductions razor-sharp. Yet, despite his brilliance, one specific thought has been haunting him lately:

He believes he’s going to die soon.

This isn't a paranoid delusion but a calculated assessment. L understands the immense dangers tied to the Kira case. The complexity of the situation has grown, and he suspects an external force at play, one that eludes even his grasp. This unknown entity has shifted the balance, making the case more perilous than ever.

L is determined not to let his legacy end prematurely. He has dedicated his life to solving the world’s most challenging mysteries, and the idea of leaving the Kira case unfinished gnaws at him. The thought of his legacy fading away too soon is unbearable.

He needs a successor.

And soon.

Finding someone who can match his intellect and tenacity is no simple task. The successor must be able to understand his intricate methods, to carry on his relentless pursuit of justice. The urgency of this mission weighs heavily on him, as he prepares to identify and groom the next guardian of his legacy.

You were the perfect match for him, and his calculations confirmed it. There was an 86% probability that having a child with you would result in someone with a higher IQ than his own, combined with the social skills he lacked. In the realm of interpersonal relationships, L was inexperienced, never having had a relationship or intimacy before. Recently, he had been contemplating how to propose this idea to you.

Should he ask you outright? Should he try to make you fall in love with him first? No, this wasn't about love. It was a precaution, a step in his investigation, a way to ensure his legacy continued if the worst were to happen.

The atmosphere in the headquarters was tense as always, the dim lighting casting long shadows across the room. You sat at your desk, engrossed in your work, when L’s quiet footsteps approached. His presence was magnetic, his aura of mystery and intellect always palpable. He paused beside you, his gaze fixed on the monitors displaying the latest updates on the Kira case.

“Can we talk?” His voice was soft, almost hesitant, a rare departure from his usual confident demeanor.

You looked up, surprised by the uncharacteristic uncertainty in his tone. “Of course, L. What’s on your mind?”

He shifted, glancing around the room as if searching for the right words. “There’s something I need to discuss with you. It’s… personal.”

Your curiosity piqued, you nodded, giving him your full attention. “I’m listening.”

He took a deep breath, his eyes meeting yours. “You’re aware of the importance of my work, of the dangers we face daily. The Kira case has made me realize that I must consider contingencies I hadn’t thought of before.”

You nodded, waiting for him to continue.

“There’s a… statistical analysis I’ve conducted,” he said, his voice becoming more clinical as he explained. “It suggests that if I were to have a child with someone of your intelligence and social capabilities, the child would have a higher IQ than mine and possess the social skills I lack. This could be crucial in continuing my work if anything were to happen to me.”

The gravity of his words hit you like a ton of bricks. L, always methodical and rational, had approached this highly personal matter with the same analytical mindset he used to solve cases. You could see the logic in his plan, yet the implications were overwhelming.

“So, you want me to… have a child with you?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady.

“Yes,” he replied, his eyes unwavering. “But understand, this is not about emotions or personal desire...I think” He whispers to himself before he continues– “It’s a precaution, a part of my contingency planning. I’ve never experienced a relationship or intimacy, so I’m uncertain how to approach this.”

The room seemed to close in around you as you processed his request. It was a cold, calculated proposition, yet it carried a weight of vulnerability and trust. L was placing his future, his legacy, in your hands.

“How do you expect this to work, L?” you asked, your voice tinged with both curiosity and trepidation.

“I’m not sure,” he admitted, his facade of invincibility cracking slightly. “I’ve considered different approaches. Should I simply ask you directly? Should I try to make you fall in love with me first? But this isn’t about love. It’s about ensuring that if I am no longer here, someone capable can continue my work.”

A silence fell between you, heavy with unspoken thoughts and emotions. L’s eyes searched yours, looking for understanding, perhaps even acceptance. You could see the conflict within him, the struggle between his logical mind and the unfamiliar territory of human connection.

“I need time to think about this,” you finally said, your voice gentle but firm.

L nodded, a flicker of relief crossing his features. “Of course. Take all the time you need. This is not a decision to be made lightly.”

Finally, you made your decision.

One evening, you found L in his usual spot, hunched over his laptop, eyes glued to the screen. The dim light cast shadows across his face, highlighting the intensity of his focus. Taking a deep breath, you approached him, your heart pounding in your chest.

“L,” you said softly, breaking the silence. He looked up, his piercing gaze meeting yours.

“I’ve thought about what you asked,” you continued, your voice steady despite the turmoil inside. “And I agree.”

For a moment, L simply stared at you, processing your words. Then, slowly, he nodded, his fingers tapping lightly on the edge of his desk. “Understood. Thank you for your cooperation.”

You took a seat across from him, the air between you charged with a new sense of purpose. “How do we proceed?”

L leaned back, his thumb brushing his bottom lip in thought. “We need to ensure this doesn’t disrupt our work or compromise the investigation. The task force must not be aware of our personal connection, as it could create complications.”

You nodded, understanding the delicate balance that needed to be maintained. L’s expression remained impassive, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes. “I must admit that emotional connections are not my area of expertise. This will be… a learning experience.  Should… we do it tonight?”

“Ah- Ah- Slow down, L-Lawliet!” you gasped, your voice breaking with a mix of pleasure and urgency.

L’s thrusts were sloppy but fast, driven more by instinct than experience. His movements lacked rhythm, a clear sign of his inexperience. He had come twice already without withdrawing from you, his body responding purely on primal urges.

He had done his research, concluding that a mating press might be the most effective position for this purpose. But he never anticipated how overwhelmingly good it would feel. Was it like this with everyone? Or was it something unique because it was you?

His thrusts grew more erratic, almost desperate. Small whines escaped his mouth, each one tinged with your name like a prayer. You could feel every twitch, every movement inside you, the raw intensity of his desire almost too much to bear.

“L,” you whispered, trying to regain some control. “You need to… slow down.”

He nodded, a bead of sweat trickling down his forehead. “I’m trying,” he panted, his voice unsteady. “It’s just… so overwhelming.”

His usually sharp, calculating mind seemed lost in the haze of sensation. Every thrust, every brush of skin against skin, was a new experience for him. You could see the conflict in his eyes, the struggle between maintaining control and giving in to the raw pleasure.

He moaned at the familiar, overwhelming sensation of climaxing again, and you could feel your own release approaching. The intensity was almost unbearable when he grabbed a pillow and slipped it under your back, angling you into an even deeper mating press. His thrusts became more deliberate, his cock somehow reaching deeper, hitting your g-spot with precision over and over again.

The pleasure was so intense, so all-consuming, that all you could do was chant his name like a mantra, each syllable a prayer of ecstasy. “L-Lawliet,” you breathed, your voice trembling with the force of your impending climax.

He watched you with dark, hungry eyes, his own pleasure driving him to thrust harder, faster. “S-shit,” he gasped, his breath hitching, “I think—” His words dissolved into a whine as he came again inside you, his release flooding your womb with a desperate, addictive need.

This wasn’t just about producing a successor anymore. It was about the raw, primal satisfaction of filling you over and over again. He was captivated by the sight of your bodies joined, the way your mixed arousal leaked from where you were connected, glistening in the dim light.

“Lawliet,” you cried out, your own climax hitting you with the force of a tidal wave. Your body tightened around him, milking every last drop of his release as he continued to thrust, his movements erratic and needy.

He whimpered, the sound vibrating through his chest as he pressed his forehead against yours, his dark hair falling in a messy curtain around your face. “You feel… incredible,” he whispered, his voice rough with emotion and exertion.

He groaned before pressing his lips to yours, the kiss deep and fervent. His cock remained erect inside you, pulsing with an insatiable desire. The feeling of having you this close, of being connected so intimately, was overwhelming. In that moment, he lost all sense of reason and the initial purpose behind his actions.

His mind, usually so sharp and focused on the Kira case, was now clouded with visions of a future he never thought he'd consider. He imagined how adorable you would look, carrying his child, a baby with his eyes and your smile. The idea of having a family with you consumed him, pushing all thoughts of logic and strategy aside.

Without realizing it, he began thrusting again, the movement instinctual and desperate. Each thrust was deliberate, fulfilling the small bump of cum inside you that was already visible through your tummy. He watched in awe, fascinated by the sight of your bodies joined so intimately, the tangible evidence of his desire and your shared pleasure.

“L-Lawliet,” you gasped against his lips, your hands clutching his shoulders as he moved within you. “What... what are you thinking?”

He pulled back slightly, his eyes locking onto yours. “I’m thinking… I’m thinking about us. About a future I never allowed myself to dream of.” His voice was rough with emotion, a raw edge that you rarely heard.

Your heart swelled at his words, the vulnerability in his usually composed demeanor striking a chord deep within you. “Lawliet,” you whispered, your fingers tracing the contours of his face. “I never imagined… I never thought you’d want this.Want me”

“I didn’t either,” he admitted, his thrusts growing more purposeful. “But now, with you, that's all I can think about. The idea of you carrying my child, of us having a family…you in general… it’s overwhelming.”

He kissed you again, more gently this time, savoring the softness of your lips against his. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure through you, the sensation heightened by the emotional intensity of the moment. His hands roamed your body, memorizing every curve, every detail.

“Do you… do you want this too?” he asked, his voice trembling slightly.

“Yes,” you breathed, the admission freeing a weight you hadn’t realized you were carrying. “I want this. I want us.”

His eyes darkened with a mix of relief and desire, and he kissed you harder, his movements inside you becoming more urgent. The room filled with the sounds of your shared pleasure, each moan and gasp a testament to the bond growing between you.

As he continued to thrust, you could feel the tension coiling tighter within you, each movement pushing you closer to the edge. He seemed to sense it too, his rhythm intensifying as he chased his own release.

“Lawliet,” you cried out, your climax hitting you with the force of a tidal wave. Your body tightened around him, every nerve ending alight with sensation.

He groaned, his own release following closely behind, filling you once more. The feeling was addictive, the raw intimacy of it all-consuming. He held you close, his forehead resting against yours as you both caught your breath.

“I can’t believe this is happening,” he whispered mostly to himself, his voice filled with wonder.

“Neither can I,” you replied, your heart pounding in sync with his. “But it feels right. It feels perfect.”

He nodded, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. “It does.”

You stayed entwined like that, savoring the afterglow and the newfound depth of your connection. The Kira case and the outside world faded into the background, replaced by the warmth of each other’s presence and the promise of a future together.

Eventually, as the reality of your situation began to seep back in, you knew you had to return to your duties. But the bond you had forged would remain, a source of strength and comfort in the days to come.

As L gently pulled out and helped you adjust, he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead. “We’ll figure this out,” he said softly in a small whisper. “Together.”

“Together,” you echoed, your heart filled with a certainty that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them side by side.

[kitimeq]

✿‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ say yes to heaven 🤍 sylus 秦 ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ✿

pairing ✿‧₊˚: lads sylus x reader

summary ✿‧₊˚: 3+1: three times Sylus suppresses his desire to have you, and one time his control finally snaps. sprinkled with relationship fluff, size difference, love confessions and whole lot of overthinking from our fav crow boy.

word count ✿‧₊˚: 13.6k (a whole ass freaking novella, grab a snack.)

tropes ✿‧₊˚: 18+, 3+1, smut, but packed with feelings, fluff, est. relationship, body worship, plot with porn??, love confessions, sylus is obsessed, and so in love, first times implied, p in v, size difference, (by size difference i mean sylus is freaking huge, like a mountain of a man, so big it actually makes him nervous bc u so small, every single one of us would be a small dot next to him that’s my personal headcanon, have you seen his ib memory? yeah, yeah u have this man HUGE), anyways what is protection they don’t use it don’t be like them, needy sylus, pet names, everything is consensual, awooo.

author’s note ✿‧₊˚: hello! i was cooking this one for so much time, i hope it’s not too boring! I’m not a native speaker so i apologize in advance for all mistakes or repetitions. I was also trying to write inclusive y/n and i hope i succeeded. I also did not imagine y/n to have a specific body type — i truly believe that no matter your size, next to sylus you would look like a crumb. as small as a pebble. believe me, i’ve studied the sacred texts (night of secrecy, grassland romance, innocent birdcage do i really have to keep on listing the memories where he enormous u get the gist). so!! i hope you’ll enjoy it ૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა

!!do NOT read if you’re not 18+!!

˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡ ݁

Sylus usually considered himself to be a patient man.

He occasionally did act on his desires—he could admit that much—but when it came to the things he truly cared about, the things he treasured, he didn’t mind the wait. He knew that the best things in life came at a price, and if the currency was time, in this case he was willing to pay in full. He knew it was worth it. That you were worth it.

You, who accepted him as he was, with all his flaws and imperfections, making his life better every day you were together. You, who were so brave, gentle, and kind that you made him want to become a better man too—just so that one day, he could say he truly deserved you. You, who he had completely fallen for, unable to imagine a world in which he wouldn’t make the same choice of courting you all over again.

That’s why he wanted nothing more than to treasure and respect you in every aspect of life—including intimacy and his own desires. And to be perfectly candid, he had plenty of those from the very moment he laid eyes on you. But he wanted to act like a gentleman, never rushing you into anything. He was patient, waiting for you to make the first move. He wanted to be sure you trusted him, that you weren’t afraid of him—or of the things he wanted to do to you if he ever got the chance.

And even after several months of officially dating you, he still stuck to his resolve, despite the unhealthy hunger growing inside him. He was adamant that you make the first move, even though the waiting was slowly killing him from the inside—his desires burning through his skin, desperate to see the light of your glossy eyes, to feel you squirming beneath him, and to hear your soft moans and whimpers, letting him know that you wanted him too.

He wanted you passionately. He didn’t desire anyone or anything else in his life. He had never thought of anyone else in such terms, which made the wait much more bearable, fun even. The occasional tension in the air only made things between you even more intriguing. Sylus wondered when the moment would come for you to finally let him explore you, taste you, just as he had wanted since the first time he held you in his arms.

He was a patient man. An inquisitive one, but patient nonetheless.

But it was just getting too much for him to handle lately.

He wondered if you were doing this on purpose. Were you trying to make him go feral with want, push him into some action? Maybe you were just too shy to ask for something more, and decided to coax him to take you right then and there? Was it an act? A part of your meticulous, sneaky plan?

He felt his sanity slowly dissipating.

“Sylus? Please, hurry up and help me, we have to go!” You turned your head to look at him, your lips puckered in an adorable pout, and your feet anxiously shifting from one to the other, the sound of your beautiful black heels clicking against the floor of your apartment. The red soles didn’t go unnoticed by him.

And what didn’t go unnoticed as well was how breathtakingly gorgeous you looked, dressed in your tight black gown that accentuated the figure he was obsessed with.

However, he was a strong man. He could look at you in a dress and not get an instant boner; he wasn’t some mere beast. But when you asked for his help, he realized that life hadn’t prepared him for everything you had up your sleeve.

Because right now, you stood before him, your back turned toward him, holding your hair in your hands and exposing a zipper that you wanted him to take care of. A zipper that ran from your neck down, down, down to your red lace panties, which peeked out from beneath the unzipped black material.

He turned his head upward at the sight, his hand reaching for the bridge of his nose, a silent prayer escaping his lips. If God existed, He was not merciful this time.

He could also clearly see that you weren’t wearing a bra, the soft skin of your back exposed, slightly hidden under the material of the dress. Hadn’t he suffered enough?

He wanted to bark. Badly.

Oh fuck, was he really going to bark?

He hoped not.

“Sy?” The nickname almost made his legs buckle. He needed a moment to calm himself after just one look at you, and it seemed to take him much longer than what would be considered natural. The impatience in your voice betrayed your desire not to be late for the opera performance, which he had promised to take you to today. He gulped audibly and realized that you had no idea what you were doing to him—and that scared him.

If you were this dangerous unintentionally, how will he survive when you’ll finally, consciously decide to take things further?

“Yes. Yes, of course, sweetie.” He managed to choke out and stepped closer to you, your delectable scent overwhelming his senses. He tried to hide the slight tremble in his hands as he reached for the zipper at the bottom of your dress. When he zipped you up, he took his sweet time caressing your body with his knuckles, basking in the soft feeling of your skin and the dangerous touch of the lace of your panties. He hoped you couldn’t hear his heartbeat—or see the pink in his cheeks. He couldn’t remember the last time he had blushed, but now he was sure of it, judging by the warmth on his face.

He was hopeless. Utterly ruined.

“There you go.” He said quietly, caressing your beautiful hair with his fingers, smoothing the creases which appeared after your hold. He brushed it from your neck and planted a slow kiss there, his movements far too composed for someone who was boiling with desire inside.

“Thank you. I couldn’t reach it at all and we’re already short on time.” You put your hand on his head, patting it gently and sighing when he touched your waist. He couldn’t help but squeeze you there, feeling the warmth of your skin through the soft material of your dress. You understood this gesture as teasing and giggled adorably.

“You look magnificent, my dove.” The compliment slipped through his lips, earning him your sweet smile and a kiss on a cheek. He watched as you passed him to grab your purse, going straight to the front door, leaving him behind. Trusting he’ll follow your step, as he always did.

Sylus closed his eyes and touched the very spot on his cheek where your lips had grazed, releasing a sigh that could be interpreted as both contentment and a silent prayer for endurance.

“You coming, Sy?” He could hear you calling for him, and he opened his eyes. His left one shone brightly at him from his reflection on the window. His Evol proved useless when his body already made it abundantly clear what—or whom—he desired the most.

“I fucking wish.” He whispered under his breath, turned around, and walked up to you, picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder as he reveled in the weight of your body pressing against him. His ears were graced by your little squeal, that quickly transformed into uncontrollable laughter, a sound he wanted to record and play every time you were away.

You slapped his back playfully and joked about wanting to use your legs once in a while, and he laughed, saying that he just wanted to make sure that he had all he needed with him. Then, he grabbed his coat with his Evol, and used it to slam the door after you both went out. He hoped that the lust he felt, which started to get out of his control, managed to stay behind them.

He waited for so long; how hard could it be to wait for another couple of months?

˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡

Hard.

Tremendously hard, both theoretically and physically, given the reaction of his body upon the contact.

He shifted slightly so that you wouldn’t feel his growing bulge against your core, his hands hovered over your thighs, his cheeks flaming hot. He was about to fucking pass out.

But you were none the wiser, sitting on his body, strangling him with your soft, mouth-watering thighs, practically rubbing yourself against him, and performing your little dance of victory after pushing him to the ground during your sparring.

Normally, he would have laughed with you and treasured your moment of happiness, his senses overwhelmed by pride as he watched you get better and better at self-defense with every practice.

But that was just cruel.

Not only did you show up in that little piece of fabric covering your breasts, something you dared to call a sports bra, its thin straps reminiscent of a fish net, offering NO support whatsoever for your charms, but you also dared to wear that pair of leggings you claimed you had bought with your friend during your last trip to the mall.

And they were leaving nothing for his imagination, your every curve hugged tightly, every dip deliciously emphasized. And fuck, you looked gorgeous in wine red. You knew you did.

“I got it in your color! Do you like it?” You asked upon entering his gym, twirling for him like the most adorable fucking thing he had ever had the pleasure of seeing, your arms up and your hair still untied. He did saw red, and it wasn’t just the color of your clothing.

His color. His girl in his color, he was going absolutely feral.

“I do.” He choked out, and tried to avert his eyes from your posture but lost that battle quickly. “You look stunning. My little gem.” He answered and you dared to look at him sheepishly, your face showing the signs of getting flustered.

“I’m not just a gem anymore. I’m a professional fighter.” You playfully punched his shoulder, jumping around and mimicking boxing moves, making him laugh out loud as he grabbed your fists in his hands. He pulled you closer to him and kissed your forehead, his arms wrapping around your frame.

“Is that an apology in advance?” You asked him when his lips left your skin. He smirked, his brow raising.

“Might be. Today we’ll be practicing attacks and knocking down your opponent.”

“Me? Knocking you down?” You looked at him with disbelief, your hands dropping to your sides, already defeated. “I’m doomed. Sylus, can’t I knock down Luke or Kieran instead?” Your cute pout and hands clasped in a begging gesture made him laugh again, as he fixed the bandages on your hands.

“And you think they would be easier to conquer?”

“Yes. Obviously, yes.”

“But they wouldn’t make sure you’re not going to hurt yourself, kitten, and I already know your patterns…” He leaned over you, his hot breath caressing your ear, making you shiver. His hands avoided touching your body. “And weak spots…” A whisper and a gentle bite on your earlobe were enough to send your adrenaline soaring.

“You—!” You jumped from him, like a little kitten, your face flustered and gaze filled with playful threat. “You’re going down mister. You’re SO going dooown.”

And down he went.

Right under your soft body, squashed between your warm tights, looking up at your beautiful lips twisted in an adorable, cunning smirk.

Oh, the way he loved you. The way he wanted to have you. The intensity of that feeling started to suffocate him.

“Okay, you got me, sweetie.” He choked out and tried his best to sound as nonchalant as possible. But nothing about this situation was nonchalant—your soft tights squeezing his waist and your butt pressing on his weak spot almost made him see stars. He grabbed your waist to try to stop your body from moving and gritted his teeth, fighting with himself to not buckle his hips up. “Now, up. I admit defeat.”

Defeat that had to do with the improvement of your skills and the force of your little fists, yes, but also with the way Sylus was distracted by your body, his eyes wandering everywhere during the battle, but not the places he should actually pay attention to.

Apparently, he was a weak, weak man, when the situation concerned you. Weak and impossibly horny.

“Hmm, I’m not sure if I want to.” You answered, a mischievous glint adored your gaze. He drank that expression in.

Beautiful. You were absolutely beautiful, sitting on him, your body sparkling with sweat, face red from the exhaustion. How could he keep his mind from going places? “I think I like you like this.” His eyebrows went up, and cheeks felt a little bit too warm for his liking.

What were you trying to say?

“Yes? Like what, kitten?” His heart felt like it was about to beat out of his chest. He knew that you could feel it, one of your hands rested on top of it, stroking his chest, feeling the warmth radiating from his skin through his shirt. He shivered, his body covered in goosebumps, finding the gentle touch too intense, somehow.

“Towering over you.” His breath hitched; his heart almost stopped its beating. “It’s much easier to look at your face when I’m like this. It’s nice.” His heart squeezed instead, your confession turning out to be more touching than teasing, and he cursed himself internally for belittling your interactions and intimacy lately. His mind immediately assumed sexual undertones, where everything you were doing with him, at your own, unique pace should be more than enough for him.

“You like looking at me that much, huh?” He answered, his hand going up to caress your cheek with the back of his fingers. He smiled with content, and he put his hand at the nape of your neck, hoping you’ll understand the implications.

You did. Not a second later you lowered your body so that you were lying on top of him, one of his hands holding you to himself by your waist, pressing you even closer together. He acknowledged how much he loved your full weight on his body, your hearts pressed so close to each other they started beating as one.

You put your hands on his cheeks, smiled down at him, and pressed a small kiss to one of his eyelids, and then to the tip of his nose. He closed his eyes for a moment, savoring the feeling.

“Of course. You’re my beautiful boy, Sylus.” You whispered to him, a smile adoring your face and he couldn’t help himself. He pulled you close by your neck and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips, almost whimpering into your mouth from the intensity of his feelings.

You reciprocated the kiss, not hesitating even for a second, and soon, both of your lips were swollen and glistening, your minds filled with sparkles and cotton.

You were the one to break the kiss, your mind going dizzy, body trembling from the arousal. He could feel it without using his Evol—the desire that raised within you, the fire that now flowed through your veins. His eyes sparkled with anticipation.

One moment and you’ll go pliant against him, melting into his embrace.

One second, and he’ll finally taste heaven, be as close to you as anyone ever has been.

“Y/N, will it be alright if I—” He started speaking, your eyes looking at him from above as you held onto his cheek and neck, caressing his skin with your thumbs, making him feel oh, so cherished. Yet, he didn’t manage to finish the request because a sudden crash from the door opening pierced through the silent room, popping your comfortable bubble in an instant.

You jumped out of his embrace, leaving him cold and yearning, his hands sliding over his face in frustration.

“Boss—”

“Luke, Kieran it better be fucking important.” Sylus hissed through his teeth, and the fact that he didn’t even try to hide his frustration made you huff out a laugh and you quickly covered your mouth with your hand. You didn’t want to laugh at him so openly, hiding how adorable his anger towards boys seemed to you at that moment.

His eyes caught yours, lured by the bubbly sound, and one of the corners of his mouth went up slightly. He raised his hand to your covered mouth and brought your hand down with his fingers, revealing your smile.

“It is, Boss! The Girm Company chairman called and demanded a meeting in thirty minutes.” Luke said quickly, Kieran peeking out from behind his shoulder. “And he didn’t want to take “no” for an answer.” Kieran added, his body now revealed.

You were not sure if Sylus was even listening, his eyes glued to your face, his fingers tracing the line of your smile absentmindedly. He still didn’t raise from the floor of the ring, his posture relaxed, one arm now resting behind his head.

“That bastard.” He answered under his breath, and closed his eyes in annoyance for a second and when he opened them, they were once again glued to you. “If you don’t want me to leave, just say a word.” He said, and put a strand of your hair behind your ear. The back of his hand started a slow caress of your cheek, and you felt embarrassed, knowing that the boys were still looking at you both, waiting for Sylus’s answer.

“It’s okay, Sy. I actually have some errands to run in Linkon so I better get going.” You answered, grabbing his hand and pressing a kiss to his fingers. His breath hitched, eyes following the movement with a longing deep in his chest. “Besides, I’m tired of beating your ass today. Save some dignity for the next time.” You added with a mischievous look, poking his hard chest with your finger teasingly.

The laugh that came out of his chest was sudden—loud, deep, and so sincere that it warmed your chest, your lips spreading in a proud smile. He grabbed your hand off of his chest and brought it to his lips, kissing your fingertips. The mirth in his eyes clearly visible, the affection bare and tangible.

“You are so generous, sweetie. Letting your pray off the hook so easily.” He couldn’t stop smiling even when he was raising to his feet, his hand going to massage his left shoulder. He looked at you and offered you his hand, which you immediately accepted. He helped you stand, his eyes tracing your every move, still unable to look away.

Your body entranced him, your presence lit a fire in his veins. The point where your hands touched warm and almost overwhelming. His desire for more once again proven unquenchable.

“Boys, let him know I’ll be there. It seems that I need to remind him who actually is in the position to make demands.” His voice was now authoritative, followed by the boys’ exclamations of “Will do, boss,” along with two salutes send his way.

And they were gone just as quickly as they had appeared.

“Don’t be too harsh on the chairman. I don’t want to get in the way of your business.” He saw you turn to him with a worried expression on your face, and he leaned down to place a kiss on your forehead, his lips lingering on the spot for much longer than necessary.

“Hmm, I’m afraid that’s impossible.” He took your hand in his and placed a kiss on your knuckles, looking deep into your eyes. The sadness of you parting ways already blooming inside him. ���They cut our time together short, so I’m planning on making them pay for that offense generously.” He smirked and watched you shake your head with disbelief, a small smile gracing your lips.

“I already miss you.” He heard you saying and you surprised him by throwing your arms around his neck, then kissing him almost senseless.

He closed his eyes and returned the kiss, which was starting to border on filthy. His hands grabbed your frame, pressing you closer to him, as his body bent toward you.

When you parted, your breaths were hot and heavy, a string of saliva still keeping your mouths connected. He stared at the filthy sight, his heart pounding in his chest, his boxers starting to become a rather tight fit. You placed a hand on his chest and pushed him away gently, your fingers trailing downward until they grazed his abdomen. He gulped audibly and remained still, watching you walk further and further away. He didn’t trust himself to move even an inch, afraid he wouldn’t be able to restrain himself anymore.

“Bye, Sylus. I’ll let you know when I get home safely.” You told him, walking away backwards now, your eyes not leaving his. “And we’ll continue what we started next time, okay, Boss?” The last part a whisper from your sweet lips, almost making him drop to his knees right then and there. You waved at him, shyness visible on your cheeks, and then you left him in the middle of the ring, stunned and filled with excruciating desire to finally have you.

Next time.

He groaned, his hands covering his blushing face, his mind already imagining the things he’ll do to you, only if you let him. God, he hoped that you’ll let him.

He did arrive late to the meeting that day, having to compose himself for much longer than you would have expected. He also made sure the chairman regretted keeping him away from you—your softness, your scent, an addictive drug he never wanted to be deprived of. The audacity to take that from him deserved nothing less than the highest of punishments.

He couldn’t help it; he already missed you.

˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡

Sylus could write poems about his beloved, listing all her remarkable qualities and quirks; however, not once would he describe her as elegant and composed.

You usually were a tornado of various emotions, a temple of the things you cherished, your expressions lively and loud, honest and unrestrained.

You were also a bit clumsy—an occasional stumble, a bump to your limb now and then, or a broken glass wasn’t anything that Sylus hadn’t see you do before. He often worried about you and your safety, with new bruises appearing on your body from bumping into things or a piece of glass piercing through your delicate skin. Sometimes, he wished he could protect you from yourself too, but all he could do was press a kiss to every small injury you sustained from your hectic movements.

All bumps aside, he utterly adored that quality of yours. Every time he caught you acting awkwardly his chest seemed to shrink on itself, his heart squeezing, cute aggression overcoming his senses. You were just so adorable in those moments, the sight always reminding him of a little fawn, beautiful but uneasy on its feet. His craving to grab you and hold you in his arms, protecting you from the whole world, was strong; the urge to press a kiss to your forehead, then to kiss you senseless, even stronger. You were his little chaos: wonderful in your unexpectedness, extraordinary in every sense of the word.

Needless to say, he was used to your adorable clumsiness. He loved it.

That was probably why his brain stopped working when you proved to be everything but clumsy while playing the games at the local funfair. Your moves sure and precise, your gaze locked onto the targets, your body positioned exactly how it should be in order to gain the reward you wanted—whether it was a new plushie, a funky gadget or even some snacks.

And he had to say that this new, confident, borderline cocky behavior you were displaying was making him feel some things.

“Wait, let me try this time.” You said the first time he couldn’t score the prize, the claw mocking him relentlessly, wounding his pride.

You got that plushie in one, excellent attempt.

“Let me get that for you, Sy.” You proposed later, seeing him eyeing a figurine of a crow that reminded him of Mephisto. You were able to get not only that, but also a coupon for a food stall that served the best waffles you’ve ever eaten. As for Sylus, the sweetness of the treat paled in comparison to your blinding smile, with whipped cream still staining the corner of your mouth. He swiped it away with his thumb, then licked the digit, sending you a wink in the process.

He took pride in your blush, especially when making each other red that day started to feel like a competition between you two, whether you were aware of it or not.

“You want this one? Say no more, handsome.” Your words almost making him choke, your hands already grabbing the controls, your body bending over the machine, offering him a wonderful view of your ass. The tips of his ears immediately started to feel as if caught on fire. Even though he knew that you were teasing him, the pet name sounding foreign from your lips, he liked the feeling of you taking the initiative.

He also couldn’t stop his eyes from wandering, your body presented to him in a way that felt illegal to watch. He swiped his gaze up from the nape of your neck to your shoulders, taking note of your delicious-looking waist, perky butt, and thighs, which seemed lonely without his hands squeezing and kneading the soft flesh.

The cheerful sound of the machine made him snap back into reality, just as you were looking over your shoulder, sending him the sexiest, oh so sexy, proud smirk he ever saw in his life. He smirked right back, even though his legs felt disturbingly like jelly.

“I’m starting to think you enjoy this.” He remarked, grabbing the prize from your hands once again, the rest of your treasures already sitting comfortably in the back of his car. You send him a mischievous smile and fixed your hair, your fingers threading through the strands, the smell of your perfume reaching him once again during that night.

He wanted to devour you.

“And what’s wrong with that?” One of your hands grabbed his bicep, holding on to him as you started your lazy stroll in search of yet another entertainment. “You always get me things. And since I know now that you suck at these games, I have a perfect opportunity to return the favor.” He laughed at that, his hand moving to flick your forehead.

“I don’t suck at these games, all of them are tempered with, sweetie. I actually find it astonishing that you are so good at them.” His reply kind of soothing his wounded pride, his mind once again remembering your movements from before. The way you moved with confidence and grace, the little smirks and winks you send his way. His blood started to boil several stalls ago, and it hasn’t calmed since. “Makes one wonder about the extent of your abilities.”

The new, cocky, and self-confident side of you aroused him almost to the point of him grabbing you by the waist and taking you to his car, taking advantage of his tined widows.

“It all comes down to having a good strategy, as someone once taught me.” You said, repeating the words Sylus is always saying to you during your training, a mirth lacing your tone. How he adored you.

“Wise counseling you have here, kitten. You must have a fantastic teacher, if his lessons are proving to be useful anywhere you go.” The smile not leaving your face making him never want to look away.

“Oh, yes, he is. And an eye-candy too.” You touched his nose with the tip of your finger teasingly while he laughed. He stopped walking and turned to you fully, his arms closing around your waist, bringing you to him, close enough for your bodies to touch. The height difference always made him dizzy, with your head fully tilted upward in order to catch his gaze.

“Mm. Maybe that’s a quality he learned from you.” His tone quiet, one of his hands going to touch your cheek, his thumb pressing on your bottom lip. You appeared stunned. “I cannot think of someone sweeter than you. If he’s a candy, you’re one delectable dessert.” He whispered, his eyes going from your eyes to your lips, their reddish tone reminding him of a little cherry. He was fighting with himself not to put his hands on your ass, and squeeze the flesh that you kept pushing his way from the very beginning of your date, or not to place a kiss on your smart little mouth, which kept sending him these playful smirks all day long. He knew that if he started here, he would not be able to stop. No one would be capable of separating him from you, public place be damned.

His desire boiling inside him, threatening to melt his vessels and pour from his body, enveloping you in a tight, pleasurable embrace. He felt feverish, your body pressed to his giving him all the warmth he ever needed, molding his thoughts to fit only your frame.

You were perfect in his eyes. Your body, the perfect shape for him to hold, your face the only one he wanted to remember. And the way he felt when he was with you—so immensely happy, so carefree, so right—was a feeling he had never even dreamed about having. Your banter, little jokes and witty comments made him so at ease he never wanted to stop talking to you, afraid of depriving himself of even a second of the comfort you brought him: the knowledge that he could speak his mind freely, for you understood him beyond the limitations of language. By your side, he could be himself, the thoughts in his head quiet, giving way to expressing himself in any way he wanted. His little taste of heaven: the time you spent together.

He loved you. So intensely it used to scare him, but now he was offering himself willingly, no longer afraid of rejection. Even though you both still didn’t acknowledge it out loud, the feeling lingered in the air between you — a delectable sweetness, a comforting fragrance.

He wanted you. Body and soul. Soul and body. He liked to think he already had your soul in grasp, your actions and openness served as a perfect proof of that, yet your body was still his to claim. And the fact that there was still a part of you he didn’t manage to possess, to thoroughly acknowledge, frustrated him inconceivably.

Especially because you had that strong of an effect on him. Everything you did capable of driving him perfectly insane. Oh, how you had him wrapped around your little finger, without being aware how completely obsessed he was with you.

“Is that so?” His gaze went from your hypnotizing eyes back to your lips, drinking in every single whisper. You stood on your tiptoes, the sight making his hands squeeze your waist tighter, his breath quickening, mind trying to process closer distance. “If he keeps sweet-talking me like this, then I guess he will finally get to taste it.” You grabbed his chin and tilted it down, pressing a soft, drawn-out kiss to his lips. His eyes closed immediately, desperate to heighten his senses. He wanted this kiss to last, both in the moment and later in his memory.

And just as he was about to wrap his arms around your back, pulling you closer, hiding your body from everyone else just to steal a few more kisses, you stepped back, the quiet sound of a smooch echoing between you. He bit his lip, almost drawing blood, restraining himself from chasing after your lips.

“C’mon now. I still have a few tricks up my sleeve that I need to show you.” You gripped his hand tighter and started to walk toward one of the booths. You sent him a smile over your shoulder, making his efforts to calm his racing heart futile. “And then maybe we can grab some cotton candy? All this talk about sweets made me crave some.”

“Anything for you, sweetie.” He answered absentmindedly, your taste still lingering on his lips. How were you always able to move on from the kisses so quickly? It would be the only thing he could think about in the next minutes.

“And what do you want?”

“Hmm?” The question shocked him, his eyebrows going up, his eyes intently observing your face.

“Do you have something you’d like to do while we’re here? I keep dragging you stall to stall ever since we came here.” You said while turning to fully face him, grabbing both of his hands. “I want you to have fun too.”

“I always have fun when I’m with you.” His response honest, his thumb caressing your knuckles. “You make life so interesting. And today you already managed to surprise me, so I would say that was more than enough entertainment for me in a day.” You rolled your eyes at him, a small smile on your lips, and looked at him with patience.

“But the day’s not over yet. Isn’t there anything you’d like to do? Look around.”

He lifted his head from your frame and began taking in the booths and various food stalls that had previously escaped his attention. He hummed, and he could feel you shifting on your feet, unable to contain your excitement.

That’s when he caught something interesting out of the corner of his eye—a couple emerging from a small booth, huge smiles plastered on their faces as they held small pieces of paper. A spark of excitement ignited inside him upon realizing what it was.

“There. I want to have a memento.” He said, his finger pointing to that innocent-looking booth. Almost impossible to spot in the abundance of lights and sounds coming from other attractions.

“Okay! I think I already won you a mountain of mementos but if—Ah!” Your eyes lit up when you realized what he was pointing to, your lips spreading in a cheerful smile. “A photo booth! Sylus, that’s wonderful!”

It wasn’t long before you were both inside the booth, the space cramped, almost too small for him to fit. He sat on the small stool, taking up nearly all the space, leaving you no choice but to sit on one of his legs. Your arms wrapped around his neck for stability, yet there wasn’t a hint of discomfort on your face.

He loved how natural it was for you to be this close to him, the proximity no longer making you nervous. He still remembered how you were at the beginning of your acquaintance, when even an eye contact was enough to make you shy away. Now, touching him was as easy as breathing, your body relaxed and pliant under his wandering hands.

While you were clicking playfully on the screen, setting up the machine, he took his time observing you—mainly how your body looked next to his, which made him short-circuit, reminding him why he was still waiting for you to make the first move in initiating sexual intimacy. The reason he didn’t want to rush things, nervousness buried deep inside his chest.

You were sitting on his leg, your whole body weighting next to nothing, his one limb nearly twice as big as both of yours. Your soft flesh pressed to him didn’t even take up half of the place available on his leg, and when he put one of his hands on your back, the huge patch of your skin he was able to cover made him gulp audibly.

You were so tiny, next to him.

He was a huge man, and he knew that. Not just his height, but his overall build made even other men look small in comparison. While he usually considered it one of his greatest assets, a fantastic tool for intimidation, in this particular case, it planted a seed of worry in him.

It took some time for you not to shy away from his touch, not to flinch every time he leaned to you, his body covering whole line of your vision. And it took him even more time to learn how he should touch you and hold you, not to put too much force behind his caresses, not to make you bruise. And although the gentleness run in his bloodstream by now, he was still worried about the actual sex.

What if he scares you? His body completely covered your delicious curves without issue.

What if he overwhelms you? His stamina and eagerness matched his overall size.

What if he hurts you? The thought of your body unable to accommodate to his size made his blood run cold.

He looked at your body again, and he had to hold in a sigh. He loved your curves, the unbelievable softness of your skin, how warm you were. He felt his hunger increasing every day, every minute, every second he spent in your presence.

Yet he had to wait patiently, not wanting to scare you. He also knew that you were starting to get bolder with him day by day. He liked to think that it was just a matter of time until you will initiate something more, cover him with your soft embrace, let him melt in your warmth.

Because at the end of the day, his observations of your size difference not only filled his mind with fear, but also made his body tingle in all the right places. The arousal he felt knowing that he could manhandle you without any issue, cover your whole body entirely with his, shield you from the world and its coldness—all consuming. The only thing he could think about.

You were tiny in his embrace.

But he could make it work. He will make it work so good.

How could he hurt you when he was so certain that you were made to be his? Two halves of a perfect soul.

His hand slid down to hug your waist and he pressed a lingering kiss to your shoulder. It made you giggle, you thought that it was his way of showing impatience. And it was, in a way. Just not the kind of impatience you assumed it was.

“All set! I had some fun with the stickers, do you want to choose your own?” He looked at the screen and opened his mouth to deny, but one sticker did actually catch his attention. He clicked on the small dove and placed it in the bottom of the template, next to the various hearts you already decorated it with.

“That’s you. The resemblance is almost striking.” He said making you laugh and you picked a sticker of some kind of a black bird.

“And that’s you. They unfortunately don’t have a crow one so this little fella has to work.” You placed the sticker close to the dove one, satisfied with your work.

“I get the vision. When I’m squinting my eyes, I guess.”

You had four pictures taken, all accompanied by laughter and endless teasing. One where you kissed his cheek, one hand holding his jaw, his eyes closed and features relaxed. One where he pretended to bite your neck, your face caught in laughter. One where he rolled his eyes, reacting to your lame joke of getting rabies from his bite, as you placed your pointed fingers above his head, adoring him with imaginary horns, your mouth open in fake shock. And the last one, where you grabbed his face and kissed him, his gentle smile pressed against your mouth, a picture of joy that couldn’t be restrained.

“I might have gone kind of overboard with the stickers.” You said when you got your two copies of the pictures, four perfect rectangles inside a scarlet border, adorned with hearts, flowers and stars. Two adorable birds were at the very bottom of it, just below the date. Sylus looked at the pictures, and his heart seemed to grow bigger, the wave of emotions making him unable to utter even a simple word. “But I think they’re cute regardless! It’s so nice to finally have a picture of us printed out. I’m definitely going to frame mine.” You said and took out your phone to take a picture of it.

His thumb gently caressed the piece of paper, words still stuck in his throat.

It was the very first picture of you two together, and when he looked at it, he couldn’t help but get emotional, knowing that he never expected to have someone like you in his life. Someone to cherish, to protect, to hold. Someone who reciprocated his feelings, someone who will never leave him, even if doomsday falls upon Linkon, even if the world crumbles.

“Are you okay, Sy? You’ve gone nonverbal again.” He felt your hand on his wrist, offering him a gentle squeeze. He finally looked at you, going out of the trace he was in, and saw your beautiful face laced with concern. He felt your hand going up and down his arm, caressing him in order to bring comfort.

“Did I?” He managed to choke out and hugged you to his chest, craving the closeness, not wanting you to see his slightly glistening eyes. He feared that the darkness of the night would not be enough to cover them, the lights from the fun fair only exaggerating his sudden surge of emotions. “They’re perfect. Thank you.” You hugged his torso tightly, your arms going up and down his back. You knew him well enough to realize he got emotional, but you were smart enough to let him savor his feelings in peace. If he was not comfortable showing you his tears, you had to understand it—the knowledge of how much it meant to him already warming your heart.

“Anything for you, Sylus.” You repeated the same thing he said to you earlier, and he picked you up, still hugging you to himself, his face finding coverage in the crook of your neck.

“Sly little thing.” He whispered and pressed a kiss there, drinking in the sound of your laugh and melting under the touch of your fingers, which stroked his hair affectionately.

Oh, how he couldn’t wait to finally be yours completely.

˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡

Mesmerizing.

You, dancing in his room at two p.m to the new vinyl he bought, your hair down, arms up. Your eyes were closed and there was a small, relaxed smile playing on your lips, that seemed to grow bigger with each sway of your hips. You decided to wear the nightgown he got you some time ago, white lace caressing your body with a gentle flow of the shiny fabric.

He couldn’t breathe. All air sucked out of his lungs the moment he turned around and saw you swaying to the music he picked out. A surge of want so intense came over him that he was afraid to move even an inch—his body on fire, his mind filled with the visions of you, thoughts of you, and what you could be reduced to, enriched with under the touch of his hands.

If only he wasn’t a coward.

“Will you join me?” you said over your shoulder, opening your eyes slightly, and you must’ve seen something unusual in his eyes, because your movements slowed down and a furrow appeared between your brows. He wanted to kiss it off instantly. “Sy?”

You were so precious and delicate, a perfect opposite of his harsh exterior and even more barbaric interior. He waited so long, restrained himself for so much time, waiting for you to move first—now, standing before you, the thought that you wanted him this way too pierced a hole in his heart and filled it with fear.

“Forgive me. I cannot.” he answered, his voice coming out with a slight growl, that he couldn’t contain anymore. He inhaled deeply and gritted his teeth, hoping that he was at least successful in not making his eye glow, his Evol suddenly unstable. He didn’t want to know your desires, not when they were visible so clearly on your face now—openness and anticipation, ever since you went back from your date.

He hoped that shower would be able to calm you down, even though the warm and steady stream of the water didn’t manage to help him this time around.

He was losing his composure and he was losing it fast. Weeks of this insatiable hunger, unrelenting need and dripping tension did that to him. He knew he was fighting a losing battle ever since he laid his eyes on you today, looking so cozy in your oversized sweater, filling the air around him with your intoxicating scent.

He was ready to devour you months ago, the buildup straining his muscles now, making him restless. He was a goner—one wrong move and his previous patience and willingness for you to take the lead reducing to vapor.

“Why? We always dance together to your vinyls, especially the new ones.” Your movements faltered to a stop, your magnificent face turned to him, with an expression so honest it made his heart clench painfully.

He thought of all the times you danced under the moonlight, soft notes of his favorite music floating through the air, your bodies moving to the rhythm, sometimes gracefully, some other times not so much. The feelings overwhelmed him even more drastically, his eyes closing for a moment.

It was enough time for you to close the distance, and soon he felt your cold hand pressing against his cheek, swiping the flesh with your thumb. He squeezed his eyelids shut tighter, the touch making his soul burn. You took his head in both of your hands, lowering it to face you.

“Sylus, talk to me.” you said, tone worried. He could feel you standing on your tiptoes, wanting to bring your face closer to his. His body almost shaking with the need to hold you. “You’re acting very unusual today. Is something wrong?” He exhaled the air he didn’t know he was holding and opened his eyes. Your face was so close that he could see the shadow your eyelashes cast on your cheeks. He could feel your breath, warm and inviting.

“I can’t touch you now,” he managed to utter, his hands at his sides, struck in cruel stillness. He locked his eyes with yours, filled with worry and a comforting gentleness. You were always so gentle with him; it made him go insane. “Because if I do, I won’t be able to hold back anymore.”

He saw the realization in the shift of your features as you fully grasped the meaning of his words. To his surprise, you took one of his hands in yours, and placed it on your cleavage, right over your beating heart, the rhythm beneath his palm fast but steady.

“Then don’t. Why would you even want to hold back with me?” You answered, slightly breathless, a pleasurable tingling already setting deeply in your abdomen. You looked at his face, the redness of his cheeks nearly matching the color of his eyes, the look he gave you so desperate it turned your legs to cotton.

The sudden burst of happiness in your chest almost made you tremble, you had waited so long for him to finally claim you as his, and it seemed he had finally reached his limit.

“I don’t—” He stumbled upon his words; a reaction so different from his usual self-confident demeanor it made you crave to uncover more versions of him. All versions of him, every single one he was willing to show you. “I can’t help but fear that I will hurt you. You are so soft, so breakable, it makes me nervous. Aren’t you scared of me? Of—Of what I could do, to you?” The confession slipping out of him, and he grabbed your wrist in one hand, the other coming to rest on your back. He slowly brought you to him, pressing your bodies together. He heard your breath falter, and drank that sound in. Then don’t — you had no idea what a hurricane you managed to stir inside him with just two simple words.

“Sy. My sweet, caring gentleman.” He heard your answer, and felt your fingers caressing his under eyes gently, your eyes never leaving his. One of your fingers touched the wrinkle between his brows, smoothing the furrowed surface. “You could never hurt me, even if you wanted to. You’re so fixated on the knowledge what you can do, that you’re forgetting that you’ve never even touched me hard enough to leave a bruise. No matter how much I wanted you to, sometimes.”

“You—”

“I’m not scared of you, Sylus. I could never, and I will never be scared of you. You’re the one with whom I feel the safest.” His hands started trembling, his patience thinning with every beautiful word from your lips. You were telling him things he didn’t even know how desperately he wanted to hear. “And I want you. I want to finally feel you, all your roughness and sharp edges. I want all of it.” The sound of your breathing mingled with the soft tunes of the vinyl. The air thick with want.

Any second now, he could feel it in the shiver down his spine.

“And I want it now.”

Snap.

His resolve shattered as he pulled you into him, capturing your lips in a kiss so deep and desperate it left your legs trembling. He kissed you with raw intensity, his tongue exploring your mouth, drinking in every sound you made as his hands roamed your body, claiming every inch he could reach.

You felt him everywhere. Your thighs, hips, waist, your neck, hair and breasts—he seemed to touch everything he was depriving himself of before. His hands huge, and although slightly rushed and trembling, still surprisingly gentle.

He lifted you up, your legs straining his waist and he laid you down on his bed, not breaking the kiss for even a second, your breath his breath, your lips water to quench his thirst.

His head was spinning, and when he finally opened his eyes the sight before him alone made him lose his mind.

You were sprawled under him, your hair a wild mess, your lips swollen from the abundance of his kisses. Your eyes glistened, the look in them so full of trust and love, love so visible it nearly broke him in half.

“You’re exquisite. Irresistible. Ethereal.” The praises slipped out of his tongue before he could stop them. The last bit of control fleeting with the touch of your impatient fingers, unbuttoning his shirt, taking it off of him in a matter of seconds. He couldn’t even find it in himself to tease you for your impatience, not when his brain already turned into mush after touching your bare skin. “You look as if you’re coated in frosting. My sweet girl, my most delectable little sin.” His eyes focused on your white dress; his hands not brave enough to let it slip off of you yet. He already feared the man he would become upon seeing you fully bared before him.

“Sylus—”

“It’s unholy. How much I want you.” His lips traced a path from beneath your ear down to your neck, finding their place on your collarbones. “How much I need you. The greed unexplainable, insatiable no matter how close I get to you. It’s not enough. It will never be enough.” His eyes met yours in a silent question and you nodded quickly in permission, gulping audibly, your eyes drooping. He let his hands travel up your legs, grazing your inner thighs, swiping through your hips, his palms tracing the lace of your panties, making the hair on his body raise. He then swiped through your waist and finally, finally his hands rested on your breasts, where you wanted them from the very beginning.

His breath hitched as he looked down your body, noticing how his touch had already lifted the fabric of your dress, baring your legs and stomach. His body shielded you from the chill in the air.

He squeezed your breasts gently, fondling them in his hands, a low groan escaping his lips—the same ones which couldn’t resist kissing your belly, anywhere he could reach, not even thinking about stopping his sensual kneading. It baffled him, how soft you were, how pliant under his touch. His hands, although taking so much of the space on your body didn’t seem to make you nervous at all—every single one of his touches you accepted with soft sights, low whines and a bitten lip. You trusted him, and he was drunk on that trust, wanted more, needed to see how far it could take him.

It quickly appeared that there was no limit to the things he could do to you, your whispers not only appreciative, but also encouraging. The uncontrollable thrusts of his hips against the duvet bordered on painful, the knowledge that he would have you in mere minutes making him unbearably hard. But he accepted the friction, your comfort mattered to him the most, and he wanted to take care of you properly.

“Sylus. Sylus, more, please.” He heard your silent plea, and caught your eyes in his, and that’s when he decided it was a time for you to drop the dress. He helped you out of it then licked the goosebumps forming between your breasts, each tiny dot on your skin making him awfully aware that this was it. Your beautiful form, completely bare, just for him to see, to worship.

“My little gem.” He breathed out, his eyes drinking in your body, committing to his memory every dip and curve. “My treasure.” He nearly growled, his mouth attached to your breast, licking and sucking on your nipple, moaning in the process. He wanted to devour you whole, to not leave a patch of skin untouched by his mouth. He thrived in the way you took hold of his head, your hands messing up his hair, caressing it when his tongue worshipped your breasts and nipples, drowning in their softness. He found his safe place.

“Oh God I—I feel like I’m floating, please don’t stop.” He heard you breathe out, your chest heaving, your legs closing in an attempt to relieve the tension building inside you. “You’re so good. So, so, so good, Sy.” He released one of your nipples with a pop, and stored the visual of your skin glistening with his saliva for later. He basked in your praise and pushed himself down, knowing exactly what he wanted to do next.

“Yes? You want it, kitten? Say you do. Please. I need you to say it.” His voice groggy, laced with yearning so tangible it made your body shiver.

“Yes. Yes, I do. Please, Sy. I waited so long for you.” Your words made his head spin, a smile spreading on his lips not flirtatious at all, just pure joy and contentment. He kissed your stomach and his hands once again swiped through your whole body. He raised on his forearms and caged your head between his arms, and then pressed a long, deep kiss on your mouth which quickly turned into another wave of heavy kisses. He wasn’t hungry anymore.

He was ravenous.

“I need to prepare you first, sweetie.” He said to your mouth, his words immediately swallowed by your perfect lips. You whimpered and his grip on your arm tightened involuntarily, his hand playing with your hair. “I need to take my time with you, otherwise I won’t be able to fit. You’re so tiny it scares me.” You nodded into the kiss and he smiled at you gently, and after pressing a kiss to your forehead, he went down.

And when he finally widened your legs, his mouth was on you instantly, making you moan, your legs clasping on his head reflexively. He grunted into your core, licking and sucking skillfully, guided entirely by pure need and his own instincts.

“You taste so sweet.” It wasn’t long before your legs were trembling and his fingers joined his mouth in an attempt to open you up a little more, to prepare you for what’s to come. “You’re dripping because of me.” He chuckled softly but deeply, chest filled with pride, and he licked your core once again, sucking at the sensitive bud. What he didn’t expect was when he managed to fit one finger inside you, angling it upwards, your back suddenly raised from the bed, hands reaching to his chest, delicately pushing him away. A drowned-out cry escaped your lips, the wetness between your tights increased, your plushy walls fluttered around his finger.

He made you come, and he instantly got addicted to it.

“Yes. Yes. Just like that, beautiful—Fuck.” With a swear word on his lips he wasted no time in slurping up your spent, his fingers from one, going up to two, then three. And when the only thing he could hear were your moans and whimpers, the taste of you imprinted on his tongue, the slide of his fingers smooth and slick—he realized that you were ready for him.

He slowly withdrew from your pussy, pressing one last lingering kiss to your clit. As his fingers slipped out of you, he finally let himself to catch more than a glimpse of your face.

And it shattered him, how utterly ruined you looked. All flushed and heaving, skin glistening with sweat, eyes shining, filled with unshed tears.

He did that to you, and he couldn’t be more proud of himself. He licked his fingers clean, savoring your taste, then he pulled you into an embrace, his arms wrapping around your whole body. Your head dropped on his bicep; your breath labored.

“You okay, kitten?” He asked gently, ignoring his painful erection, still stranded in the stiff fabric of his pants. His head pressed to your neck, and he inhaled the scent, licking off the droplets of sweat in the process. He couldn’t get enough.

“Yes. More than okay.” You answered, and he felt your hand wandering, trying to unbuckle his belt. His chest squeezed. “Need you now. Please, Sylus…”

“You don’t have to beg. I’ll gladly give you my everything. All of me.” His hands left your body for a moment, swiftly taking off his pants, his mouth now kissing your cheeks and nose.

“I want to taste you, too.” You whispered to him shyly, and he grunted, closing his eyes, begging every deity to give him more patience. How he would love for your little mouth to envelop him, but he knew that the sight alone would be enough to make him undone.

“Next time, okay, sweetie? I cannot wait to be inside you.” You giggled and nodded, pressing a kiss to his nose, stroking his hair gently.

He shivered and hissed when he took off his underwear, letting himself out in the open. He was so hard it hurt, his hand going up and down his erection in an attempt to reduce the tension, even though he knew that the only one who could truly satisfy him was you.

“Oh my god.” He heard your gasp, and noticed that you were looking at him, his body fully exposed, his cock heavy in his hand. “Sylus— Sy, it won’t fit. There’s no way that—” He silenced you with a kiss, and swiped his hand through your core, gathering the slick and spreading it on his member. The smooth glide felt so good he lost himself in the feeling for a second, his tongue licking into your mouth, swallowing your gasps.

“Shhh, I made sure to prepare you as well as I could. And I won’t hurt you, you said so yourself.” He said the last sentence into your lips, once again pressing a long kiss there. Then he kissed your cheek, and breathed hard against your neck, his one hand wrapped around your waist, holding you closer to him, and the other stroked his cock, guiding it to your entrance. When the tip touched you, he gritted his teeth and you gasped, the first contact electric. Your arms wrapped around his neck, your fingers playing nervously with the hair at his nape.

He breathed heavily; the tip of his cock aligned perfectly with your entrance. “You can take it; you were made for me. I will make it fit.” He let go of your waist and grabbed one of your hands in his, kissing your knuckles and smiling gently at you, the anticipation making his body shake. “Just relax for me, will you? Can you do that, kitten?” You nodded and exhaled slowly, some tension getting out of your body. He pressed one last kiss to your forehead and intertwined your fingers with his.

“Close your eyes. I want you to feel me.”

“No. I need to see you, Sy. Don’t make me look away.” He chuckled and pressed his forehead against yours in a silent acceptance. He never wanted to take his eyes away from you too, your desires matching perfectly.

You were his soulmate, after all.

He pressed his erection to your opening and started to slip in, gently, unhurriedly, despite the desire to take you in one thrust of his hips. You opened your mouth in a painful moan, squeezing his hand, panic visible in your eyes. He hated that he was bringing you pain, but knew that it was inevitable, he saw how wide he was stretching you out. “It’s okay, sweetheart. Easy. You’re doing so good…” He breathed out, his hand leaving his cock to hold your hip, the other going up and down your body in a comforting caress. “Taking me so well...” His voice hoarse, sweat dripping from his forehead from the strain of keeping himself under control. He managed to put the tip in, your pussy squeezing him, your heat making him shiver, the sensation the most pleasurable he ever felt. He closed his eyes for a second, trying to calm himself down.

“It hurts, it really—it really hurts.” You whispered and he grunted, feeling you squeeze him harder, his length sliding into you deeper. He opened his eyes and lowered his body to get closer to your face, and placed a kiss between your eyebrows.

“I know, love. If you want to me stop—” He couldn’t recognize his voice anymore.

“No. Never. Please.” You kissed his brow, and send him a small smile. “I—I can take it. I was made for you, yeah?”

He huffed out a laugh, a whimper finding a way out at the same time.

“You were. Mmhm. Good.” He slipped in further, his mouth opening wider. “Good girl. Just a little more.” And before he managed to stop the shivering of his body, he burrowed himself in your tight heat almost to the brim. You were not able to take all of him in yet, but it was nearly a perfect fit, the sight of you wrapped around him made him see red, a low moan slipping out of him, your whimpers the most magnificent tune he ever heard.

“I’m going to move now.” He said and you moaned, your head nodding frantically.

He started thrusting inside you, and he felt as if fireworks exploded inside him, the desire burning brightly, need finally calming down, his mind completely at ease. Your moans, whimpers, cute little “ah,ah,ah’s” making his whole body shiver, a smile finding its way onto his swollen lips. You felt so good below him, your warmth enveloping him fully, and he started to question if he truly was worthy of such a blessing.

He didn’t care anymore. He had you, you wanted him and that was all that mattered now.

“You’re so. fucking. tight. God.” He started moving faster to the accompaniment of your small encouragements, his hand holding onto yours. And when your legs wrapped around his hips, bringing him closer to you, he was gone.

He grabbed your waist and lifted up your butt, the pace and force of his thrusts intensifying, his grunts leaving his mouth freely, silent praises slipping from his lips every now and then. He couldn’t stop now. Didn’t want to stop.

“I want—I want to stay inside you forever. I feel—Ah—Mm—like I’m melting.” He moaned and you felt his mouth on your body, kissing every patch of skin he was able to reach. You kept breathing out soft, quiet moans, tears filling your vision. “So cute.”

You felt so good, the stretch now pleasurable, your body accepting him fully, every thrust welcome, each one anticipated.

And he could see that so clearly on your face, his mind calming, knowing that he was able to bring you pleasure. It made him feel better too, your lovely expressions making his blood pump faster, his hips thrust deeper, just to see and hear more tokens of your delight. He was addicted to you and your reactions, to the way you sang his name, the way your skin tasted and eyes glistened every time he managed to catch eye contact.

Time quickly went by when you were losing yourselves in each other. The positions changed constantly, Sylus looking for and finding new ways to tip you over the edge, making sure you were completely satisfied. You encouraged him to leave some marks on you, and you made sure to repay the sentiment, scratching his back with your nails, and pressing hickies on his chest—he already wished for the marks to stay there forever, and you assured him that you’ll stay instead, making him jump on you once again, burying his head in your shoulder.

“Say my name, kitten. Keep—Keep saying my name.” He grunted, his hips unrelenting, your bodies soaked, your own so tired that he had to hold it in his arm for you to not slip off the bed. He kept thrusting inside you from behind, his lips pressing gentle kisses on your neck and shoulder, his movements deep and sensual, pleasure overwhelming. You granted his wish, your voice hoarse and quiet.

You were going at it for hours now, yet he still hasn’t come.

Not because he couldn’t, but because every time he was close, he was slipping out of you, his eyes squeezing shut, a hand gripping himself at the base.

He didn’t want the night to end, refused to let you go, savored the feeling of being buried deep inside you, not knowing where you ended and he began.

“Sy—Mmm—Sylus—Ah.” The words failed you, your mind filled only with pleasure and thoughts of him. You were so tired and yet he made you feel so good you wanted to stay in his arms forever. “The—Ah—The sun is rising.”

He nuzzled into your cheek, his thrusts slowing down, quiet grunts leaving his lips. He sounded wrecked.

“I know, love. You look so wonderful in this light.” He kissed your cheek and glued himself off of you, leaving your body cold and shivering. In the next second, he manhandled you onto your back again, facing him. Your hands immediately flew to cover your face, fearing how completely ruined you must have looked after so much time making love and so many orgasms ripped out of you.

“No—Mmh—Don’t hide yourself from me.” He grunted, and took your hands in his gently, revealing the beautiful mess he managed to make of you. Your face covered in tears, cheeks flushed and lips so swollen it only made him want to kiss them some more. So he did. “Never hide yourself from me, dove. Hold me.” He kissed the palms of your hands and put them on his neck, your arms going to hold him closer. He huffed out a weak laugh, his thrusts not stopping even for a second. You felt his huge hands caressing your thighs and you moaned softly. “God, I’m sorry, kitten, I just can’t stop—I—”

“It’s okay, S—Sylus. Ah—I won’t run away.” You pulled his head closer and kissed his lips softly. His hands encircled your waist, drawing your body closer to him, the hair on his forehead brushing against your chest. Your eyes met his and he seemed to calm slightly, your gaze soothing the flame inside him.

“I love you. I—” You suddenly confessed, a single tear slipping down your cheek. His breath faltered, ruby eyes widening, your words shaking his world completely. “I love you, Sylus. So much. I love you so intensely it scares me, I—Ah—” A moan was ripped from you when he suddenly picked up the pace, the sweat from his forehead landing between your breasts. Another happy tear slipped from your eye, and if you had enough energy to keep your eyes open, you’d see that he was teary-eyed too. His hands grabbed your head, turning it up so he could look straight into your eyes—his own burning with desire and unspoken devotion. He needed to hear you say the words once more, but before he could start pleading for it, you managed to read his mind.

“I love you, Sylus.”

And those words were what finally made him shatter.

He came, so violently he nearly blacked out, his whole body trembling, and movements faltering, his cock buried inside you the deepest he could go. He released grunt after grunt, his arms holding you tight to him, your soft sighs only seemed to prolong his fall. He nuzzled his face up against your neck, then cheek, his lips touching your skin, unable to press more kisses due to the uncontrollable moans coming out of his mouth.

“F-Fuck—” He managed to choke out and you tried to calm your heavy breathing, focused on his cum filling you up, so much that you could already feel it spilling out. You whined and brought your hands to his waist, holding him close, and you came one last time too, your pussy squeezing him even tighter, ripping a short cry out of him. Goosebumps spread around your body from the pleasure and you went pliant in his arms, letting your sore muscles finally rest against the soft sheets.

Sylus relaxed a few moments later, his sweaty body collapsing on top of you, mindful not to put his full weight on you. His hot, heavy breath still warmed your neck, your hearts beating rapidly against each other, showing no signs of calming anytime soon. He managed to turn onto his side, his arms still wrapped around you, taking your body with him.

You were held in a wet, yet warm embrace, his arms protecting you from the cold morning air, your bodies still connected. The silence that ascended upon you comfortable and desired after so much time of intense workout—both throats roughed up and in need of hydration.

“Sylus, I—” You started saying, your voice a rough whisper, your head raising to meet his gaze, surprised that his crimson eyes were already studying you. He put one of his hands on the back of your head, his fingers playing with your hair ever so gently.

His gaze so intense you started to turn your head away, but he gently brought it back to him. He didn’t have to open his mouth for you to understand what he was feeling—the emotion in his eyes unmistakable.

“I love you, too.” He breathed out, his hand going up to your cheek, stroking it with the back of his fingers. His hand was cold and served as a delightful compress for your burning face. “I love you more than any words could ever express.”

He reminded you of a statue under this warm, morning light, his body perfectly sculpted. The only source of color were his cheeks, blaring red, nearly matching the color of his sparkling eyes. His wet hair still bearing the paths carved by your fingers, his lips kissed and twitching, fighting off a smile, which threatened to form when he realized how intensely you were observing him.

“My home is your home, my heart is your heart. Every breath I’ve been taking ever since I met you had already been yours — the day you tell me to cease, I will gladly do so.” He continued, his breath slowly calming down, one of your hands going to stroke his chest.

“I will never tell you to cease, you little dramatic fool.” You answered playfully, blinking away your tears, your hand going to rest on his warm cheek, his face immediately nuzzling into your palm. “If anything, I would curse you to live forever. Soundly and happily, by my side.” A soft laugh came out of his lips; a start of a smile that overtook his entire face, lightening up his features, showing off his small sharp canines.

“By your side...” He repeated, his voice possessing a dream-like quality, a smirk still visible. He swiped his hand over your body: from your shoulder, through your waist, down to your hip, and then back up. His touch soothing as always. “A curse has never sounded so sweet, my little dove.” He closed his eyes, and a sigh escaped his lips. The happiness spread through his body so intensely, that he thought he was going to burst.

Live forever, by your side. There was no other place in the entire universe where he would rather be.

He felt you squirming, a crease appearing between your brows, your hand squeezing his bicep. He hissed, feeling you squeeze him down there too, his cock still buried deep inside you, your plush walls a place he never wanted to leave. However, he knew that after so much time and so many orgasms you needed a break, your body sensitive and in need of extensive pampering. Good thing he adored spoiling you with affection.

“I’m going to pull out now, okay sweetheart?” You nodded your head, a small smile on your lips. You were just too adorable. “And then I’ll put you in a warm bath, order your favorite meal and change the sheets. Any objections?”

“None at all.” He switched your position so that he was once again on top of you, and he gently pulled out, a grunt leaving his lips at the loss of the comfortable fit. You whimpered when his cum started flowing out of you freely, and he couldn’t look away, the sight making the desire in him burn once more. He stopped himself before he started showing the cum back inside you. “Will you join me in the bath too?” He looked at your face, covered in the warm sunlight, the sight making him breathless.

“I would love to, if that’s what you want.” He hugged you to himself one more time, his body covering yours completely, his face finding refuge in the crook of your neck. He grazed the delicate skin with his teeth, then pressed his lips to your pulse, his tongue picking out to lick at your salty skin. “I love you.” He whispered into your neck, basking in the feeling of your heartbeat beneath his lips. “I love you, Y/N. Thank you for showing me what love feels like. Thank you for accepting me.” His breath started going out labored, the intensity of the emotion too big for his body.

“Thank you, for letting me love you. You are the best thing that happened to me, Sylus. I hope you know that.” Your kiss to his temple and your hands caressing his back felt like a blessing, your bodies connected in a soul-crushing hug his own private oasis. Never in his life had he experienced such a moment of total tranquility; only you were capable of bringing him peace.

He never wanted to let you go, and he didn’t have to. No other thought filled him with so much joy. You were his, just as much as he was yours. An ideal exchange of souls.

“I do.” He breathed out, and looked into your loving eyes once again. You smiled at him, and he felt his breath being punched out of him, his ruby eyes fluttering. He shook his head and reciprocated the smile, which quickly turned into a full laugh, your bodies shaking, hearts beating in unison. “I truly do.”

Your lips found his in a kiss that tasted like a promise—of a hand to hold, body to warm up to, and a heart that beat for one another. In every life, every universe, and in every space and time—now, and forevermore.

˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡ bonus! ˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡

“So, which one finally did it?” You asked him nonchalantly, when you were both freshly washed up, lying on the new, pleasurably chilly sheets, basking in the afternoon sunlight. Too exhausted to raise, too happy to fall asleep after the whole night of making love.

His head on your chest stirred slightly, a confusion slowly overtaking his features.

“Hmm?” He opened his eyes, but he didn’t find it in himself to raise. His arms holding your body close to his, tightening their hold, a signal he hoped would make you continue the caress of his back with your fingers.

Your skin bared a fragrance of his soap and his skin, and he felt drunk ever since he noticed it.

“The workout outfit a size too small? Or those jeans at the funfair?” You continued, and his mind started to connect the dots. His eyes widened. “I knew that I would be sticking my ass out a lot that day so I made sure they were extra tight.” He heard you giggle and raised his head immediately, his gaze falling on yours.

“You—”

“What? You were making me wait forever! And don’t get me wrong…” You cupped his cheek, and he was rendered speechless. The whole time he was fighting for his sanity, trying to wait for you, restraining himself from taking you on the nearest piece of furniture — You were riling him up on purpose? “I love that you are a gentleman, and the princess treatment is really nice too, but I just couldn’t wait to have you ravish me, you know? Your girl has needs.”

He was going completely insane. He let out a hearty laugh, and shook his head in disbelief. It seemed that he underestimated you again, forgot that your desires and needs matched his almost perfectly.

And he should’ve known that the workout clothes were a bit too revealing for your liking. Fuck, he should’ve known.

“And it seems my girl is a sly little vixen.” His voice laced with humor, a smile still visible, head impossibly light. He hummed, and kissed a smile off of your plump lips, then your neck, shoulders and chest. You started trembling, and the smile he sent you this time made him look as if he was a wolf studying his pray. You gulped audibly. “Well then, if you decided to manipulate me, then I think you are ready to suffer the consequences.” His kisses reached your breasts, and he took one perky nipple into his mouth, sucking passionately. His other hand grabbed at the other boob, kneading the flesh languidly.

“But it’s already bright outside, shouldn’t we—” A press of his finger on your lips hushed you, and his eyes met yours, his lips still circled around your delicate nipple. With a snap of his fingers the curtains covered the windows, cutting of the only source of light. Darkness enveloped you, making the press of his body on yours even more intimate. Your body was still on fire after the hours of tangling in sheets, every part of you sensitive and tingling under his skilled hands.

“Ah, ah. You’re trembling. Why is that, I wonder?” You heard his voice closer to your ear, and when your eyes got used to the darkness, you saw his eyes filled with mirth and something primal. His hands went slowly up your tights, their destination obvious. “I had no idea that my kitten was that starved. Now I can’t possibly leave her unsatisfied, can I?”

You felt his hands touch your warmest spot, and you let fireworks overtake you once more, your spine twisting to get closer to him. He tasted the skin on your chest again, and went down with his kisses, leaving a happy, wet trial in its wake. He raised suddenly, kissing you on the lips.

“And what about the zipper?” He asked absentmindedly into your lips, remembering the situation that nearly made him lose his mind couple of weeks ago.

“What zipper?” Your confusion truthful, your squeal loud when he suddenly plopped motionless on top of you, a sigh of exasperation leaving his mouth.

It seems that loving you was the beginning of his end, after all.

˙⟡⋆˚✿˖°⟡

thank you for your time! ♡ PLEASE let me know if you liked it, i would appreciate every single comment and engagement!!! i would be so happy to read your reactions (ㅅ´ ˘ `)

likes would be much appreciated ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

[yazzwrites6962]

Lonely ♡ L Lawliet

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ L Lawliet x Fem!Wife!Reader ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Author's Note: UNEDITED! Established relationship between L and the reader. This is the first smut I have ever written, so pleaseeeeee be patient with me. I'm just a baby writer (I'm over 18. Don't take this literally). If you find any more warnings I should list, please let me know! I don't own any characters or images!

Genre: Smut/Fluff

Summary: It's lonely being the wife of the greatest detective in the world, especially when he's not the best at showing affection. However, something seems different about him today.

Word Count: 2533

Warnings: Sexual content, themes of loneliness, slight angst, OOC L, Fem! oral receiving, penetration, unprotected intercourse, light breeding kink, praise, begging, daddy kink, creampie.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

You knew what you were getting yourself into when you married him. You knew there would be many nights when he wouldn't come home. You knew there were some compromises you would have to make. Still, it took its toll on you over the years.

It felt like he married you out of convenience. You met young, and you fell so deeply in love with L the moment you saw him. Maybe it was his wit, or the deep charming look in his eyes. All your friends teased your obvious, painful crush on him. You didn't care. Your heart was set from the moment you met him.

The day he approached you and asked you to marry him was the happiest day of your life. You readily agreed without a second thought. You didn't pause to question why he asked. You didn't ponder about the fact you had only a handful of interactions.

"After much observation, I had determined that you will make an exceptional spouse." That's what L always told you when you would ask why. It was true. On the rare occasion that your husband was home, he had a nice meal waiting for him. He had a clean home and a made bed. It was a practical relationship.

He gave you affection, of course, but it always seemed like a chore to him. There were only a handful of times the two of you had been intimate. He never fully seemed to give himself to you, and the loneliness began to weigh you down.

A quick buzz sounded from your phone. You pull yourself off the couch, stretching a bit before checking the notification. It was a text from your husband. He was on his way home, after a week of being caught up in his work and sleeping at the office again. Despite all your conflicting feelings, butterflies fill your stomach. You love your husband. That has never changed.

You rush yourself to the kitchen. Early in your marriage, you'd managed to learn how to make his favorite desserts. You began to slave away over the counters, wanting to give your best effort. L was rarely ever home, so when he was, you gave it your all.

You hear the front door open. He's home much faster than you had anticipated. The desserts you were working on are still baking. You hadn't had time to get ready. Your hair was a mess, your clothes covered in creams and flour, and no makeup. You see L round the corner into the kitchen before his eyes land on you.

"Welcome home, Sweetheart." You say with a chuckle. "You came so much quicker than I thought you would. I haven't had time to finish my cooking or clean myself up."

L is silent, his gaze fixed on you. You grow nervous, fearing his disapproval. He seems tense or frustrated. You have trouble telling what's going on in his mind. He nearly never opens up about his feelings to you.

"Is everything alright? You seem... quiet." You comment, wiping your hands and approaching your husband. "Is everything going alright at work?"

"I want to have intercourse," Your eyes widen as L finally speaks. There were not the words you were expecting to hear. Not even a greeting. Straight to the point. "With you, of course."

"W-Well, no duh with me! I'd sure hope so!" You choke out, growing embarrassed. "What's this about? You seem off, Sweetheart. What's going on?"

"I love you." L says suddenly. He had only said this once before, on your wedding day, and you hardly believed that. It only felt as though it was part of his vows. You were always the more affectionate one, expressing your love without expecting any response.

"I... I love you too." You mutter, shocked by this sudden declaration. "W-What's going on, L. Seriously. If something is wrong, I need to know. I want to help."

"I know you do. You always have." L gives you a rare smirk, awkwardly wrapping his arms around you. Hugs were given on occasion, but this felt different. You could hear his heart beating out of his chest as you lay your head against him. "You have always been my greatest ally, Y/N. I realize that my appreciation for you goes unspoken more often than not. I would like to have intercourse, as a display of my gratitude and affection for you."

You look up at him, scanning his expression. It's comforting to feel his embrace. It's something you rarely get to experience. Yet, you feel this must be too good to be true.

"Darling, you don't have to do anything like that for me to know that you appreciate me, or that you care." Although, in the past year, you truly haven't felt appreciated or loved. You've felt more like a maid than anything.

"Y/N, I want you." He says, in a tone that sounds like a nearly frustrated whine. It's a sound you have never heard before. Still, everything indicates that he is speaking the truth.

He hesitates for a moment before leaning down to meet you face to face. His hands reach to your chin, tilting your head slightly. It's almost as if he's inspecting your face. Just as you are about to ask what he is doing, his lips land on yours.

Your husband was never fond of kissing. He was disgusted by the idea of sharing saliva. Yet, here you were, squeaking in surprise as his tongue forced his way into your mouth. You relax into the kiss. It's soft, and passionate. Your heartbeat practically echoes throughout the room as your excitement increases.

His hands find their way to your waist. He rubs circles on your skin and toys with the fabric of your shirt. You lean into him, your hands roaming his surprisingly toned chest. When you first married, he was much scrawnier than he is now. The thought of your wedding fills your heart with joy.

It was a small ceremony. Private. Very few people knew. Still, you felt as though you were the luckiest girl in the world. When those doors finally opened and L laid his eyes on you, you could've sworn you saw him tear up.

"You are arousing." He whispers in your ear, snapping you out of your pleasant memories. His hands snake under your shirt and gently trace your bare skin. "Even such minimal contact with you can cause a physical reaction."

You look down to see the outline of a very large bulge through L's sweatpants. His arms wrap at your hips, picking you up off the ground. Your legs instinctively wrap around his waist. His erection prods against you. He carries you to your bedroom, gently placing you onto the bed. His dominance and affection are unusual, but very much welcome.

"Do I have your consent to remove your clothes and proceed with intercourse?" You chuckle at his formality. You've known him so long. He's seen every part of you. Yet, something still makes your cheeks flush with embarrassment.

"Yes, Lawliet. You do." With that, his hands swiftly move to your pants, sliding them off your hips, down your thighs, and finally off your body entirely. He kneels against the side of the bed, peppering kisses on your skin.

Beforehand, intimacy felt somewhat cold and distant. He had always kept your enjoyment in mind, but had never shown so much affection as he had been showing now.

You feel your arousal pooling as his kisses make their way higher and higher, his thumb teasing at the waistline of your panties. He hooks his index finger around them, slowly pulling them down.

"My, someone is eager." He jokes, his hands positioning your thighs over his shoulders. "Open wide for me, Princess." Simply the sound of his husky voice calling you an affectionate pet name would've made your heart race. What makes your heart nearly explode was the feeling of his tongue swiping a line up your wet core. You let out a shaky breath as he continues, lapping up your arousal.

At first, he is slow and delicate. This is something you had never done before. L was never a fan of foreplay. He enjoyed getting straight to the point. However, as small whimpers and moans escaped your throat, his intensity increased. He grew desperate to hear more, devouring you like an animal. Your thighs squeezed around his head, but this did not stop him. His tongue continued to make your mind go cloudy. Soon, you felt your climax approaching.

"L-Lawliet!" You whimper, moans cascading from your mouth like a waterfall. "I can't take much more!" Your hands, which once gripped the bedsheets, travel to your husband's unruly hair. You tug it lightly, causing him to grunt. His nails dig into your waist as he continues.

Soon, you find yourself releasing on his face with a loud moan. He licks up your liquids and you squeak as his tongue passes back over your most sensitive parts.

Your husband stands, his chest heaving as he undresses. Any remaining garments of yours are shed quickly as well. The moment feels so intimate, and vulnerable. You reach towards the nightstand. With how infrequently you and your husband would have intercourse, you find it somewhat pointless to consistently take birth control. Instead, your primary contraceptive was now condoms. However, L's hand stops you at your wrist.

"I want to have a child. Would this be acceptable to you?" He asks, gently, his eyes never leaving yours. This feels like such a sudden development. L had never expressed interest in having a family before. However, this was something you had been hoping for since the beginning. Tears of joy fill your eyes as you nod. "May I have your verbal confirmation?"

"Of course, my Love." You say quickly, as if the opportunity will pass you by. "I'd want nothing more, but where is this coming from?" Your husband smiles as he leans over your frame, his arms on either side of you.

"I have found myself thinking of you more and more often. The idea of protecting and providing for you has always been in my mind. Yet, in the past few weeks, I have been craving your warmth under the pressure of my current case." L says softly. You listen intently. He has rarely ever opened up about his feelings. Especially not about your relationship. "I do not mean physical warmth in this context. Although, that is something I have missed. I am referring to your overwhelming domesticity and optimism. You are comforting."

"I find you comforting too." Your hand cups his cheek. He nods, happy with your response as he lifts your right leg ever so slightly, positioning himself at your entrance. You look down, spotting his throbbing cock, pre-cum leaking from the tip. You didn't think it possible to become more aroused than you already were, but here you felt your heart race faster and your face grow warmer. He teases you, rubbing himself against your wetness. "Please, Baby." You groan, earning a hitch in breath from L.

He pushes himself in slowly, feeling your warm walls squeeze around his as he bottoms out. He exhales a shaky breath, his nails clawing at the sheets and his eyes squeezed shut. He fears that if he opens his eyes and sees you beneath him, he wouldn't last.

"You take me so well." His voice is low, and he finally opens his eyes. He has given you a few moments to adjust, and he begins to pump in and out of you.

His thrusts are slow and loving at first as he praises you, peppering you with kisses. As your moans and whimpers grow louder, his thrusts pick up in speed, like he's feeding off your pleasure. The sounds of wet slapping skin fill the room, accompanied with L's occasional labored breaths and grunts. Your legs are wrapped around his hips, and your nails scratch into his back. You can tell your husband is getting closer to his climax, as his thrusts become more animalistic and sloppier.

"That's my good girl." He growls as your walls tighten; you're getting closer to your release as well. You whimper, his name slipping from your lips. This only seems to send him further into depravity, as he lets out a loud groan and a hand grabs at your ass.

"I-I'm so close-" You whimper as your husband presses into your sweet spot over and over again. His pace slows down, his eyes laced with desire.

"Beg for it. Beg to cum for me, or I will stop." You don't dare test or tease him. You know that he absolutely has the self-control to stop right then and there. Your legs tighten around his hips.

"No! Please! Don't stop, L. Please, I need this so bad. Please, let me cum. You make me feel so good Daddy." Though you had never called him this before, it seemed to unlock something within him. His thrusts become faster than you can handle, and your orgasm begins to wash over you. "A-Ah! Please! Right there!"

"Fuck." He whispers, lowering his head beside yours. You can hear his subtle cursing and growls right in your ear. Your mind fogs as you reach your climax, biting down on his shoulder as you cum on his cock. "G-Gonna cum-" He does so soon after, emptying himself out inside you with a couple extra thrusts.

He takes a moment to catch his breath before collapsing onto the bed beside you. The glimmer of sweat on his bare chest is truly a sight to see. Somehow, his hair managed to get even messier than it usually is. You giggle, happy to see your husband in such a vulnerable state.

"I hope you found this satisfactory." He turns to you, his eyes shining with affection and adoration. You turn on your side, laying your head on his chest as he wraps his arms around you.

"What's gotten into you?" You ask, tracing doodles on his body with your finger. He hums, thinking of a proper way to answer your question. "You're very affectionate today."

"There are a pair of individuals I have been observing for a time. They go by the names of Light Yagami and Misa Amane. Miss Amane is quite affectionate with Mr. Yagami. However, I notice that he often will not return this sentiment. She is left unsatisfied and desperate for any crumb of attention from Light." L turns to you, brushing a few strands of hair out of your face. "I do not desire to do the same to you. I do love you, Y/N. Since the day I met you. I would like to have a family with you. I would like to be more present. I want you to feel the love I have for you."

You smile, hugging his tightly. You try to hold the tears in your eyes. You've always been relatively confident that he cared for you and loved you. He just shows his affection a little differently. Yet, his concern for your happiness filled a loneliness you'd refused to acknowledge for a long time.

"I love you too."

[stitched-mouth-vs-the-world]

Pegging L Would Include…

Pairing: L Lawliet x Fem! Strap-On! Reader.

Summary: You manage to convince L to part take in a kink you've been wanting to try out.

Warnings: Smut, Anal sex, Mention of Virgin! L, Strap-On, Pegging, Oral sex (fem receiving), Handjob, Masterbating?, Cum eating, established relationship.

Writing Time: 20 minutes.

Word Count: 493.

Format: Kinktober Headcannons, Day 13.

A/N:

I think I've had this idea for a year now. Glad I finally wrote it. I took a 4 days break and now I'm worried I'm not gonna have all these work written in time. This is day 13 but in the order I'm writing in I think it's day 12. I might this work short so I could start on another Kinktober work immediately after but it's 1am and I start work at 8am...so who knows. Enjoy!

Here are my other Kinktober 2023 works.

---///---

• L would be over the moon that someone has any romantic or sexual interest in him.

• He doesn't quite know how attractive he is.

• Especially since he doesn't take care of himself.

• So he was pleasantly surprised when he realised you was attracted to him.

• Yes, he figured it out before you told him. He's too perspective to not notice.

• But even more surprised when your relationship became sexual.

• You got to tell him about your sexual desires before he figured it out.

• I don't think he would figure it out tbh.

• He's perspective about everything... except sex.

• He has no experience and very little knowledge on the subject so hopefully you know what you're doing.

• If you didn't know before, you figure it out before approaching L about a sexual fantasy you have.

• You suddenly couldn't stop thinking about dicking him down.

• You wanted nothing more than to put on a strap on and fuck his tight little asshole till he was creaming (screaming and cumming).

• L, whilst definitely a little nervous, is more than willing to appease you.

• As long as it's not criminal, L is willing to give his girl anything she asks for.

• So when you pull out your long pink strap on, he gulps and shyly turns around and gives you a perfect view and opportunity.

• You rub lube over your silicone dick and L's cute little hole and slowly ease into him.

• Careful not to hurt him. This is the first time he's had anything up there.

• Once L is comfortable you start moving, setting a pace well suited for the both of you.

• You're fondling your tits with one hand and jerking your boyfriend off in the other.

• His moans are music to your ears.

• Simply fucking beautiful.

• L cums all over your fingers and moved away from you, letting you slip out of him.

• He looks at you with a smile and thanks you shyly, for showing him a good time.

• You lick your cum covered hand and politely ask him if he's going to make you cum next.

• L smiles again and nods, before pulling your strap-on off and connecting his lips to your lower lips.

[rinneroraito]

muLtitasking

Work and pleasure don't mix, or do they? NSFW L x Female reader, 2K+ words, no protection

It's one of those nights for L ever since he has experienced you. Sure, it wasn't something he really sought out before, but there was the afterglow and the evident feeling of his mind being refreshed after a good session with you that he had come to appreciate the benefits of sex. He needs a quick reset, and he's quite sure you'll help him with it. Hopping off of his swivel chair, he makes his way to your side of the office.

"Y/N come with me, please,” He briefly glances at the other Task Force Members who were going about with their own duties. "I require your assistance."

You were in the middle of organizing files and have been looking for an excuse to get away from the boring menial task so as soon as L calls you out, you don't even care that some of the folders fall off the table when you leave your desk. He needed your assistance, and you knew exactly what he meant.

His lips find yours immediately after the door to his room closes. L holds your face close with both of his hands, palms flush against your cheeks, fingers caressing the outlines of your jaw, the underside of your ear. It’s something he had grown comfortable doing ever since you started being intimate with each other. You notice the faint taste of black tea on his tongue as the kiss grows deeper and then he suddenly pulls back, wide piercing eyes full of want gazing at you.

"My apologies for immediately starting, I haven't even asked properly yet. Would you like to have se-"

"Yes," you reply, cutting him off, feeling your cheeks burn from the blood rushing to your face. "Yes, I would like to. You don’t have to ask every time, silly."

“I know, but obtaining your consent every time is of paramount importance to me.”

“Alright… I mean, it is hot when you ask,” you reach out to rake the strands of hair on his forehead before settling your hand on his cheek. Despite the deep shadows under his eyes and his gaunt features, he was still extremely attractive. L closes his eyes at the warmth of your palm, god, you loved looking at him. You notice that his cheeks are slightly flushed. Seems like you weren’t the only one whose blood was rushing to places.

"Very well, thank you for indulging me," he answers, smiling slightly as he leads you to the bed.

After a few more kisses your clothes come away and L finds himself under you as you straddle him. He has openly expressed how he liked this arrangement because seeing you grind while on top of him was "a very stimulating experience" and "increases enjoyment by a factor of 90%" as he says. You dive into the crook of his neck, your breasts pressing firmly on his chest as you plant gentle kisses along the length of his throat. The feeling teases a sigh out of him that quickly turns into a hiss the moment your tongue starts making contact with his skin.

"Th-that feels.... Good," he says almost breathlessly, his hands firm on your hips as you gently edge your drenched pussy along his hardening cock. 

“You like that?”

"Y-yes, keep going… please…"

He's very vocal when you have sex, extremely appreciative, always telling you what feels good for him and also always making sure you feel good, too, when it's his turn to pleasure you. It's something you liked a lot about him, you never have to guess because he'll just tell you.

L writhes against the irresistible invitation of your wet cunt, finding just the right angle to take you in. He struggles at this for a bit because you've started digging your teeth lightly into his neck. You’re filling his senses right now and for a moment he considers that you might be all he needs, your touch, your scent, your taste. The way your mouth set fire on his skin, your fingers traversing the length of his arms, the way your hair caressed him as it fell over your faces and the faint scent of your shampoo. It’s addicting, you were addicting. The sensations are becoming unbearable at this point and he just wants to bury himself inside you where it's hot and wet and fills his head with something other than cases to be solved.

"I'm going to fuck you now."

"You don't need to say it, L just ah-"

Your sentence gets caught in your breath as he bucks into you, sheathing himself right at the hilt. There's a self-satisfied smile on his face when you look down at him as you straighten yourself away from his neck. He continues to stare at you when he pulls himself out and pushes himself back in, relishing in how easy it was for him to just sink himself inside you because of your sopping wetness, basking in the way your eyelids flutter and face contorted in pleasure.

"You f-feel... Incredible... Keep your eyes open for me, alright?"

"G-god, you’re… Haahn… Cheeky," you respond as his pace starts to pick up and you steady yourself on your arms.

Then, amidst the throes of passion within his dimly lit room, a blaring sound breaks. His ring tone.

There's evident annoyance on his face as he hears his phone. Could there have been something he has forgotten? Or maybe it's an important update? He halts from his motions and reaches down to the side of the bed where his jeans were, taking out his phone and an earpiece.

"Excuse me, it's Watari, I'll be needing to take this call."

"Oh, okay. Would you like me to get off of you?"

"No, just stay quiet for me," he presses the screen to his smartphone to take the call, places it right next to his head on the pillow and wears the earpiece on his right ear.

"Watari, talk to me." His grip returns to your waist, keeping you in place. Work was important, but so were getting you to finish. And since you’ve already started, L figured multitasking would be a good choice.

Your eyes widened as he resumed thrusting himself up into you while he conversed with his handler.

"That's good to know. Have you asked about how they'll be documenting it?"

His dark eyes stay on you as you bring a hand up to squeeze your mouth shut, his pace increasing. Was L really fucking you while talking about an important update in the investigation? Dear god, it's taking all of your concentration not to let a sound out. Your moans are converted into sharp exhales and he looks up at you, severely entertained by the state you were in.

"I advice that a camera should be on each prisoner as they write each other's name, also I might need to think up of a specific hmm," he hums softly, closing his eyes for a moment as he feels you clenching around his cock, "gesture for them to do to for further proof that it is indeed the pages from the notebook that executes them."

Seeing him get distracted for a moment instills some mischief in you and you lean down towards him, kissing his lips briefly before your tongue sought out his neck again. 

“Two can play that game,” you purr directly into his left ear before licking the shell-like structure of his helix.

L's breath caught in his throat as he listened to Watari's reply on the other end. He hears you giggling softly, his hold growing firmer around your hips as he thrusted himself deeper into you.

"Good. Could you please confirm which UN officials will be present for the viewing?"

The saltiness of his sweat fills your tongue as you slide it firmly along the groove of his neck. You could feel him struggle to keep his composure, his motions becoming erratic.

"Well," he exhales a quiet and ragged sigh before he continues speaking. "Kindly resend the invitation citing how extremely important their presence would be for the viewing. It is for their benefit also. We're going to need as many of the representatives if not all of them," his eyebrows knit as he pulls himself together, feeling your teeth graze the sensitive length of his throat. "To witness the notebook's capabilities. Yes, they can send a proxy, as long as there’s a representative."

It was honestly, extremely hot how L's still able to speak in his usual monotone and complete sentences even while you were in the midst of fornication. You trail your tongue further up his neck, into his ear again where you nibbled on his earlobe. He swallows a groan back as he feels your warm breath and mouth on his ear, his hips continuing to buck into you.

"Alright. Call me again when the rest of the representatives respond and the schedule is confirmed. Thank you."

The call ends and you whisper into his ear.

"Y-you're a menace, L..."

"Says the person who, ahn, made it more challenging for me to speak," he replies, his thrusts faster. "I could, mmh, feel that you were enjoying it as much as I was, you were, haah, contracting around me every time I spoke..."

You lean away from L's neck to look at him, his sweaty hair sticking to his forehead, eyes dark and glassy, mouth hanging open as he draws a breath every time he pumps his cock into your dripping pussy. He’s an electrifying mess right now, and the sight of him is enough to get you close to coming undone.

"Y-you're just so-oh, hot,” you manage to whimper out, muscles straining. His thrusts were desperate now, too, fingers digging into your sides. “F-fuck... L... coming..."

"Me too…” he cranes his neck forward to you, beads of sweat trickling down his temples. “K-kiss me right now, please..."

You meet his lips again in a heated kiss, tongues lapping each other up as he practically lifts himself off the bed to plunge himself into you as deep as he could go. Your moans are muffled into his mouth, knuckles turning white as you squeeze the pillowcase around his head, toes curling on his bedsheet as you feel him pulse right inside you filling you up, your walls contracting around him. L groans heavily into your lips, arms now wrapped so tight around your waist that it almost seemed like you were a part of him that he needed so he could keep himself together. You shudder into each other, savoring every second of blissful release.

A string of saliva connects you both briefly as you pull away and he eases himself back down on the bed, arms keeping you tethered to him, breathy sighs filling the corners of his room as your nerves lull into composure.

"I might need more than one round to clear my head,” He says after a few seconds of catching his breath. “I'm still thinking of work for some reason."

"No shit, Sherlock, you just took a call. So much for mixing work and pleasure."

“Ah, well, I didn’t want to interrupt what we had already started. It all worked out in the end, didn’t it? And you enjoyed yourself, too.”

“Good god, you’re impossible.” 

L chuckles briefly at your statement, a sound he seemed to reserve only for moments with you. Smiling down at him you take his phone from where he set it on his pillow and hand it to him.

"Don't take any more calls for the night, as much as that was extremely exciting earlier, it's not safe for work," you say, reaching for the earpiece on his ear and dropping it off to where his jeans were.

"Ooh, word play."

You share a quiet laughter as he manipulates the settings on his phone. He then tosses it to the side and invites you to kiss him again by pressing your back down towards him. He was still laughing when your lips met, so instead of kissing him deeper, you pepper his face with kisses instead. There was this giddy feeling beyond the afterglow that he couldn’t place yet but as you held his face in your hands and continued to peck his cheeks with your lips, all he knew was that this was a moment he needed. And that you, in all that you were, desired him just as much as he did.

[cinnamorollcrybaby]

Good enough

Tags: Caleb x fem!Reader, smut, unprotected angry sex, Caleb’s back and he’s jealous, breeding kink, mdni, not proofread sorry, this shit is NASTY i fear.

An: This one is for a dear friend of mine 🙂‍↕️ Thanks for making me pull out of my writer’s block. LOOK i’m so sorry if this is bad but i had to write SOMETHING to pull me out of this funk… i hope you all enjoy

How did you end up trapped underneath your half-cyborg best friend who was legally deceased while taking the meanest deep strokes of your life? Well, there’s a simple answer. Caleb knew Xavier was home.

Actually, he knew everything: the dates, the tender moments, the secret times, the nightly rendezvous. Pissed was an understatement.

Had you forgotten? Had you forgotten all the promises you two made each other when you were younger? Had you forgotten that you were fucking made for him? You had to have. That’s why you were stringing along 4 different guys. You were trying to fill a hole that only he could fill.

That had to be why.

Regardless, Caleb knew Xavier was the type to listen to you through the floorboards of his upstairs apartment. He was a lot alike Caleb in that sort of manner. They were both possessive freaks who couldn’t stand the thought of you being with somebody else.

That’s why Caleb was fucking you so hard — pounding your pretty pussy so deeply into the mattress that you were seeing stars with each mean thrust.

He used his size to his advantage. It was fitting. He’d always loved how much bigger he was than you. That’s how you received your adorned nickname: pipsqueak.

He planned on his first time with you being a lot more gentle than this. He planned on being sweet and loving. He planned on cherishing your body the way you deserve, but you just had to go and give yourself to 4 other guys before him.

“Stop crying.” His voice rumbled as his piercing gaze found yours — so much different than the sweet childhood friend you had. His hand covered your mouth as he hunched over your figure, still ramming his cock head into you ruthlessly. “I know you can take it. I’ve watched you take it before.”

Your eyes blinked back tears as you looked up at him. He was being so mean. You couldn’t believe this was the same doting Caleb that you grew up with, and you didn’t even want to think about the face he had been watching you…

“Fucking pussy’s made for me, and you’ve been letting other men try to make her feel good.” He growled as he used his less-than-human arm reach down and gently rub against your small button of nerves.

“Caleb-!” You choked out as your body writhed beneath him. You could feel every ridge and vein of his thick cock splitting you apart, making you wholly his and his alone.

“That’s right… Say my name, baby. Tell me who’s making you feel so good.” He prompted with a confident smirk before he hauled your legs up above his shoulders, sinking even deeper into your dripping cunt.

Clawing at the bed, your back arched as you tried to cope with the intrusion. He’s so fucking deep it feels like you’re going to choke on him. “Caleb-“ You sob as your cunt pitifully clenches around him.

Feeling you wrapped around him so sweetly, crying out his name as you’re so overwhelmed with pleasure has Caleb revitalized with a new vigor. His hips work in tight circles, pumping his fat cock in and out of you as your cunt makes the most obscene squelching noises he’s ever heard.

“Such a fucking noisy girl. I should’ve know you were going to be a crybaby.” He teased before placing open mouth kisses along your neck snd shoulder.

“W-wait Caleb- calebcalebcaleb. I’m gonna..” You pant out nervously as his metal fingers were still rubbing languid circled around your cunt, and his tip was smooshing globs of precum against your cervix.

His fingers suddenly pinch down on your clit, making you cry out from the sensation. Your body went taut as you were being dangled on the edge of pleasure. His robotic arm wasn’t quite letting you get there.

You thought his arm was literally malfunctioning until you heard him chuckle from your suffering.

“You’re going to cum when I saw you can, okay baby?” He asked in that same condescending tone he always used when you two were younger.

His hips continued to roll after he was sure that you weren’t going to fall off the deep end, and he let out deep guttural groans, feeling your pretty pussy soak him. It was like you were practically trying to suck him in. He couldn’t believe he had waited this long to sink into your cunt like this.

and the best part about it was he knew your stupid upstairs neighbor was listening! Xavier knew you were down here getting railed, and he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.

Hell, if he even tried, Caleb would use his evol and force him kneel beside the bed as he drilled you even harder.

Fuck, the thought of slutting you out in front of every single one of your little boyfriends had his stomach tightening. His hips snapped forward into you with a pace that could only be described as feral.

You were a complete babbling mess at this point — utterly cock drunk as Caleb had you folded in half, filling you up to the brim with his length.

“Ohhh, that’s my girl.” He purred as he saw your glossed over look. “It’s coming, baby. I’m going to give you want you need.” He promised as he pressed a sweet kiss to your forehead that completely contradicted the ruthless way his hips were rutting into you.

“C-caleb- Caleb no, wait.. Don’t cum inside-“ You stuttered out in a panic. You hadn’t been by the pharmacy yet to pick up birth control, so technically, this was all unprotected.

“Why?” He growled as his back curled over. He was fucking mounting you while holding your thighs in the prettiest mating press he’d ever seen. “You fucking let them fill you up. Am I not good enough to breed this pussy?”

His hips slammed into you. It felt like he was trying to push his way straight into your womb. It was mind-numbing pleasure, making black orbs and stars dance across your vision.

“Look at me, baby.” He ordered, dragging your face to look back up at him. You could barely see straight. It was all too much. “You’re going to let your best friend breed you, and you’re gonna fucking love it. You’re going to cum all over this fat cock until you can’t breathe. Understand?”

You dumbly nodded your head, halfway hearing his words. Your pussy was aching to cum. Your swollen puffy folds were greedily accepting him in with every thrust. You wanted this. Birth control be damned. Everyone else be damned.

Caleb gritted his teeth together as he gave you a few more good harsh thrusts for good measure. He then crushed his body against yours, burying himself all the way to your womb before his cock started to jerk and pulse inside of you, shooting rope after rope of his thick potent cum. The only thing on his mind was the need to see you, his childhood best friend, round with his baby.

He needed to see the look on each other of those pricks’ faces when they realized you were spoken for.

The cherry on top was when he felt your walls clenching around him, happily milking his cock for everything he had while you sobbed and hiccuped his name. It seemed like his childhood best friend was maybe just as twisted as he was. He’d have to give her an extra good reward for being such a good girl.

As the room went still and quiet — only filled with shared breaths and pants for air, the sound of someone stabbing a sword through the ceiling was heard, and Caleb chuckled deeply. He had definitely pissed Xavier off.

[gor3-hound]

PLAY DATE — L AND LIGHT

a/n: first death note fic !! been a fan of this series forever, so happy to get to write for it :3 commission for @nexysworld... love u bad fr <3 rbs and comments always appreciated :))) 3.7k words

cw: 18+ content. p in v, double penetration, very mild dub-con, objectification/dollification, toxic relationship, creampie, edging(?), fingering, slightly ooc (moreso light than L)

You're obedient to a fault.

That's a good thing in Light's eyes. He doesn't have time to ponder your feelings. He doesn't particularly care enough to do so. You're pliable. You make it so much easier for him. There isn't an issue of you questioning him, or acting out if he doesn't give you attention. He'd had enough of that with Misa — she had been nothing but a means to an end.

But you?

Light feels as though his every action finds a justification when your eyes meet his. You're so innocent, so sweet. He feels as though if he squeezes tight enough, you'll shatter within his grasp. Sometimes, he feels the overwhelming urge to press down; to make you quiver at his touch. He wonders if, like the porcelain dolls his sister used to collect, his rough handling of you would crack the surface of your smooth, unmarred skin. 

The world is wrong. Light knows this as much as he knows he needs air — you are something to be protected from the unworthy that would like nothing more than to corrupt you. You're weak. He doesn't mean it as an insult, just an unequivocal truth. You need someone to protect you, and he trusted no one else with the task.

He sighs as he checks his Rolex — a simple, silver piece handed down from his father. It wasn’t anything particularly grand; the surface was scratched from years of use, but it was a luxury he'd grown to be rather fond of. The seconds tick down almost painfully slowly as he stares, focusing entirely on the longer hand as he watches it tick by with each passing minute.

Light was uncharacteristically nervous about today. He had no qualms about L finding out he was Kira; he knew he was smarter than the detective. Better than him. He'd find out his name soon enough, he was sure of it. But it wasn't his identity that had his heart racing with each tick of his watch.

L's… suspicions of him had led to a rather unfortunate situation — he wanted to observe you. Light is careful not to give anything away; each word that falls from his mouth is carefully crafted to elicit the reaction he desires. L has come to notice you’re less tactical in your speech, more sincere. You had an innocent demeanour, one that had admittedly attracted L’s curiosity.

L is sure that if you were aware of Light’s true nature, he would be able to draw a confession out of you easily.

“You’re late,” Light says simply as he opens the door for you, a crease forming between his brows as he regards you. His eyes slide up and down your body, taking in your outfit with a critical eye. “This isn’t what we agreed upon. Did you not like the outfit I bought for you?” 

His jaw tenses briefly, a small huff of hair escaping his nose. He shakes his head, briefly glancing at his watch once more before he allows his arm to fall against his side. “It doesn’t matter. You remember what I told you? Don’t speak unless spoken to — Ryuzaki already has his suspicions; I don’t need you making things more difficult for me. Do you understand?”

You nod softly, glancing up at his face through your lashes. Light finds himself having to suppress a shiver at the action, throat bobbing as he swallows thickly, quickly schooling his expression into something more guarded.

“Good. You’ve been so good for me lately. Don’t disappoint me today.” He murmurs, taking your hand to drag you along with him.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

A day passes, and L has already almost entirely forgotten about his initial objective. Sharing a room with you and Light had been a convenience at first — he wanted to be sure he could keep a close eye on the both of you at all times. This was a mistake, and one that he was quickly realising. 

L has never been one for much socialisation, speaking to others only when it is entirely necessary, yet he is immediately able to decipher that you are different. You shrink back at the smallest amount of questioning, eyes wide and doe-like whenever you feel as though you might have said the wrong thing. L is not a stupid man, nor is he impulsive or particularly driven by personal desires.

He was observant to a fault, and his fault appears to come in a pretty package wrapped in silk and lace with Light attached to her arm. Light’s infatuation with you irritates him to no end, even if he understands it. He wants to attach himself to your arm, but Light presents an issue. He’s willing to indulge in the game to a childish degree. One thing L hates more than anything is losing.

That same thought runs through his head as Light finally leaves the room, giving him a brief moment alone with you. “Forgive me,” he begins, regarding you with a small tilt of his head as he gains your attention. “Light seems to dislike you speaking to me. Is there a reason for this?”  

You tense slightly at the question, if only because you know Light would not be happy to find out you were speaking to L without him there to monitor you. “He’s like that, sometimes. He doesn’t let me speak with other guys much.”

The words are a half-truth, but they held honesty, nonetheless. Light was particularly cautious when it came to you being in L’s presence, but he’s always been the more possessive type. 

“I see,” he replies, resting his chin between the space where his two knees connect, his arms wrapped around his calves as he hugs his legs to his chest. He scrutinizes you with an almost childlike curiosity, but there’s a glimmer of something else in his eyes. Something infinitely more dangerous.

“I cannot say I blame him,” he continues after a short moment, humming thoughtfully. “You’re certainly… fragile. With the current state of things, I would have kept a close eye on you, too.”

“I’m capable of looking after myself.” You reply, brows furrowing slightly at his words. His lips pull down slightly at that, his gaze examining you once again. “I did not mean any harm by my words, but I simply must disagree. If Light is shown to be innocent, you are far from safe. You gave up your name easily upon our first meeting, having no certainty that I wasn’t Kira. In the few times you’ve visited, you made no attempt to conceal your ID. It has been caught on security numerous times.”

He pauses, extending his index finger to your identification, slid behind a clear case on the back of your phone, clearly visible to anyone who may pass by. “You are rather clumsy. If anyone in the task force was Kira, you could have died ten times over by now.”

“I didn’t realise.” You admit quietly, reaching out to flip your phone over despite knowing it made no difference. You can feel your cheeks heating in embarrassment.

“You see the best in people. It is an endearing trait, but an entirely stupid one. Perhaps it would be safer for you to stay here. I would hate for your connections to Light and myself to put you in danger.” He doesn’t mention his suspicions of a second Kira, deciding that you would be much more cooperative if he made it appear that his concern of you being close to Light was due to the possibility of his innocence — a theory that he was finding more evidence against with each passing day.

“My instincts rarely lead me astray.” He adds after you remain silent, feet dropping to the floor so he can lean forward, reaching out with a single finger to direct you to meet his gaze. “You should consider what I said. It would be beneficial to have Light close, and I would feel more at peace if you remained, as well.”

Footsteps are heard approaching the door, and L is quick to lean back, turning his attention to the tray of sweets at his side. He hums in thought as he scans through them, paying no mind to Light as he re enters the room. L might be good at showing nothing in his expression, removing a slice of cake from the display as Light’s gaze flicks across the room, but you’ve always been awful at hiding things. He frowns as he takes in your expression, noting instantly the nervous manner in which you chew on your lower lip, unable to meet his gaze. He joins you on the sofa, placing a protective arm around your shoulders to draw you towards him.

“I shouldn’t have to ask, but you behaved while I was gone, right?” He whispers into your ear, words laced with a hint of warning. At your small nod, he scoffs. “You seem nervous. You can’t even handle a single moment without me guiding you, can you?”

Light cannot find it within himself to be surprised at the guilty expression that crosses your face at his words. You look more like a scolded puppy than girl in that moment, a look that he’s very accustomed to. 

“I shouldn’t be surprised,” he huffs, expression turning into one of annoyance. You might not be open about it, but he’s convinced something happened when you were gone. “You’ve always been more face than brains, hmm? A girl like you is pleasant to look at, but there’s clearly not much thinking happening up here, is there?”

He taps your head, and you make a small noise of protest, attempting to press further against his side to placate him. The interaction has clearly gained L’s attention, but neither you nor Light notice in the moment. “I’m sorry, we were only talking.”

Light gives a brief glance in L’s direction then, knowing he should be careful about what he says next. He’d have to play more into the jealous boyfriend role — though that would hardly be difficult with the irritation steadily rising within him. “Is that so? Just talking? Thought I told you that pretty little head should only be worrying about me?”

His words are a warning, a way of interpreting if you let too much slip. You can hear it in his tone as much as you can see it in his gaze, but before you can speak, L cuts you off.

“I was only informing her she should be more careful, seeing as you failed to address how stupid it is that she so openly displays her name in her phone case.” The words appear calm, but there’s a hint of enjoyment in L’s tone. He enjoys being able to get one over on Light, no matter how small of a win it is. Light’s expression darkens, his jaw clenching as he turns his gaze to L. “Right. So you think it’s acceptable to tell my girl how she should be acting? I can look after her myself.”

“Perhaps you’re getting sloppy,” L bites back easily, an amused smile tugging at one corner of his lips. “Your girlfriend could easily be dead by now. It could be luck, I’m sure. The more likely scenario is you didn’t care about her ID because you knew no harm would come to her. How peculiar, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Are you insinuating I’m Kira because I overlooked a simple thing? I don’t keep tabs on her every action.”

L steps in before Light has a chance to continue. “It certainly appears like you do, and I have not known you to make such easily avoidable mistakes in the time we have worked the case together. “

“Guys—” Any attempt you make to diffuse the situation is easily cut off by both men. L shushes you gently at the same time Light snaps, “Quiet!”. You shrink back instantly, expression nervous as Light’s hold on you tightens.

“I don’t like how closely you seem to be examining my relationship, Ryuzaki. Are you sure this is really about uncovering Kira? It seems more like jealousy on my end.” Light hums, a lazy grin growing on his face as he notices L’s expression shifting slightly. “Ah. I’m not wrong, am I? You like her.”

Light grins, peeling you gently away from his side. You’re confused as he guides you by your hips to stand, but you allow him to manoeuvre you without complaint. He pushes you towards L, leaning back in his seat. “Go on then. You seem convinced you can do a better job than me.”

“Light?” You say with wide eyes, stumbling slightly as he pushes you towards L. The other man looks equally surprised, though he doesn’t seem to have any issues with your sudden closeness.

“Shh, baby. You’re not cut out to be thinking all by yourself. Ryuzaki wants to show me how I should be treating you.” He coos, that soft tone he tends to reserve only for you succeeding in turning you pliant almost instantly. You nod softly, taking a few nervous steps in L’s direction. The man makes a soft noise in the back of his throat, tired eyes trailing along your figure. This is what he had wanted — another means of rising above Light, another win for under his belt. But it’s an entirely different thing to be faced with you, your eyes wide and trusting as you stop barely inches away from him.

L reaches out to touch you, and you melt. His hands grasp your hips curiously, pulling you slightly closer, almost experimentally. You let it happen, legs parting without hesitation as he drags your thighs apart with a strong grip. There’s no hint of displeasure on your face, barely even a reaction save for the soft huff of breath that spills past your lips.

“She’s good, isn’t she?” Light hums from his spot on the couch, eyes locked onto the scene in front of him. “She’ll do whatever you tell her to, you know. She takes to training exceptionally well.”

You’re sickeningly sweet, L decides as his hands slide up so they can fiddle with the hem of your pretty lace dress. It’s no wonder he finds himself increasingly infatuated with you. He has always been a fan of sweet things. Deft fingers slide under your dress and drag along your thighs, the coldness of his touch drawing goosebumps to the surface of your skin.

“I am curious.” L admits softly, his eyes leaving your body to glance directly at Light, addressing the other man as if you aren’t even there. “She seems… sensitive. Is there anything she particularly enjoys?”

Light stands then, approaching you from behind. His eyes darken as he watches the shape of L’s hand tracing your skin under your dress, an undeniable heat building in his stomach. “She’s just happy to get the attention. Isn’t that right, doll?”

Before you can respond, Light’s fingers tangle in your hair, forcing you to nod. “See? She just wants someone to look after her.”

Light’s hands join L’s, his fingers grasping the hem of your dress so he can slowly pull it upwards, exposing inch after inch of soft skin. His fingers dip under the waistband of your panties, teasingly dragging the fabric down until they drop to the floor, pooling at your ankles. “She’s prettiest here. Go on, baby, step out of them.”

You step out of them one foot at a time, eyes hazily gazing over your shoulder to meet your boyfriend’s. A cocky grin spreads across his face, his eyes flicking across your face. The smirk only widens as you let out a soft mewl when L directs his attention on your dripping cunt, parting your folds with nimble fingers.

“You’re soft,” L hums to himself, the words appearing more like an observation than a compliment. He thumbs gently over your clit, eyes shifting to take in your reaction to the touch. At the sound of your shaky sigh and the sight of your brows furrowing with pleasure, he repeats the action.

“Don’t you feel pretty like this, baby?” Light purrs, pressing himself against you from behind. The hard line of his arousal is obvious against the curve of your ass, his fingers digging into your hips as he ruts against you with a shaky sigh. “Showing off how perfect you are for me. Ryuzaki is lucky I’m letting him play with my favourite doll, isn’t he, baby?”

“Yeah…” You breathe, head tilting back against Light as L presses the tips of two fingers against your entrance, brushing against you a few times before slowly sinking them into your tight heat. 

“Shh… Just nod, baby. You’re normally better than this. I’m disappointed. Dolls aren’t supposed to speak, are they?” Light chastises lightly, his fingers digging into your soft flesh enough that it borders on painful. You bite your lip, suppressing a soft whimper as you shake your head.

“Good. Good, that’s better. I don’t want you showing me up. You’re usually so much fun to play with.”

“She’s tight.” L murmurs to himself, eyes flicking to Light’s face over your shoulder briefly before his attention returns to your cunt. He prods and pokes at you almost clinically, exploring you before withdrawing his fingers. 

“Imagine how tight she’d be taking both of us.” L groans softly at Light’s words, unable to suppress the soft noise. He was enjoying this far more than he thought he would, the rough fabric of his jeans already tenting obscenely. Light grasps your wrists, gently bringing your hands to the front of L’s jeans. “Help him take them off.”

His tone is soft, laced with that sweetness he always uses when you’re like this. The command registers a few moments later in your mind, your hands working quickly to unzip L’s jeans. You slide them down, swallowing thickly at the sound of fabric rustling behind you.

“I’m feeling… Generous.” Light hums after a moment, gently nudging you forward to straddle L’s lap. “I’ll let you have the first taste, get her ready for us both.”

“How kind.” L responds dryly, but he doesn’t hesitate in fisting his cock a few times to coax it into full hardness. He notches the head of his cock against your entrance with a barely concealed shudder, slowly pressing into you. Light waits until that cute little crease between your brows fades into pleasure before he lifts your hips slightly, allowing him to settle between L’s spread legs and line himself up. He wouldn’t want to break his favourite toy by pushing her too fast, after all.

“Relax.” Light whispers, palm rubbing up and down your back before pressing down on your tailbone, forcing you into more of an arch. He slots into you easily, his head tipping back as a quiet groan builds in his throat. He’s almost tempted to make Ryuzaki a more permanent fixture during your ‘play time’ with how deliciously the other man’s cock rubs against his own. Light’s head drops to the crook of your neck, his breaths coming out in hot pants against your skin as he rocks into you, setting a steady pace alongside L. 

You’re so full it makes you ache, and you find yourself unable to hold in the moans bubbling in your chest as both men rock their hips in tandem, their lengths rubbing against you in a way that has you seeing stars. Light clicks his tongue softly, his fingers sliding up from your hips to your throat, briefly squeezing before they continue their path to your mouth, slipping past your plump lips to press down against your tongue.

“You’re certainly vocal for a toy.” Light admonishes, punctuating his words with a particularly harsh thrust. By the time you notice the small furrow of L’s brows, the man has already decided Light’s actions are a challenge. You don’t have the time to steady yourself before he fucks into you more aggressively, ensuring each one of his thrusts has you whining around your boyfriend’s fingers. He’s determined to make you act against Light’s expectations, to have you making as many pretty noises for him as he can.

“I think she sounds sweet,” L huffs, looking up at you with a heavy-lidded gaze. His hips drag in circular motions as he tries to find your sweet spot, insistent on being the one who makes you cum. A small, proud smile tugs at his lips as you let out a particularly obscene moan, his entire focus honing in on hitting that spot with each thrust. Your moans grow increasingly louder and more garbled as Light presses his fingers further into your mouth, spit pooling past your lips and drooling down your chin as you’re filled repeatedly by both men. 

Your thighs tremble and clench desperately, your walls tightening around both lengths as your peak rapidly approaches. You’re shaking by the time your release rolls over you in waves, slick arousal gushing from you and completely soaking them both. L’s expression is undoubtedly smug as he glances at Light over your shoulder, clearly taking credit for making you feel good.

You can hear an irritated huff from behind you, Light’s thrusts growing sloppy as his own release creeps up on him. From the lazy circles L is drawing with his hips, you can tell he isn’t far behind. Light’s fingers slip past the seal of your lips with an ‘pop’, the wet digits trailing down your cheek before settling on your shoulder. He tightens his grip, using the leverage to hold you still as he ruts into your cunt desperately. He cums first, his cock pulsating as he fills your greedy cunt with his seed. 

Light rides out his orgasm with a few languid strokes, watching L’s face closely. As soon as he sees the first signs of the man’s orgasm approaching, he taps your hips twice. You register the command in an almost dazed manner, standing up on shaky legs.

L whines, his dick kicking helplessly against his stomach as he looks between the two of you. Light only grins, holding your waist in a possessive hold. 

“What? I was hardly going to let you finish inside my girl.” Light coos, voice laced with an inflated sense of pride. “Maybe next time.”

L’s expression twists to one of thinly veiled annoyance, realising it was the plan all along. Fine. He can accept his losses.

Next time, he’ll win.

[xotoru]

⍣ ೋL Boyfriend Headcannons

Synopsis: Just cute boyfriend headcannons <3

Warnings: NSFW; oral M!recieving, p in v, sub and dom L, L is s bit of a freak, Swearing

➤ He’s the Og nerd boyfriend.he’s owns those big black framed glasses and loves his sci fi.he tries to get you into the same nerdy things he’s into but he knows it’s not really your thing.and if it is then he’s beyond happy, as much as he shows it.

➤ Despite being on his laptop ALL THE TIME, he’s very chronically offline. Any trends, he’s never seen, pranks, he doesn’t get, brainrot jokes, wtf is that????sometimes you reference whatever meme is popular at the time and he just nods acting like he knows what your talking about but he really has no clue

➤ He was so nervous asking you out like he was all “so uhm i think…we would be a very good match together and uhm…well I suppose if you-”. For once you saw a light blush brush across his normally pale face.he hasn’t had to ask a girl out since his high school years so this was very nerve racking for him

➤ WILL SPOIL THE FUCKKK OUT OF YOU. Like he doesn’t even look when you ask him if you can get something. You carry his card in your overly expensive wallet he got you that matches your birkin

➤ You were the one that got him to stop sitting sideways in that stupid chair when he sleeps, now he sleeps next to you in bed every night like normal.same with the human washing machine.it tools some time but now he showers and sleeps just like you, and typically with you.

NSFW below

➤ your first time he was super subby.whining and jerking his needy hips up into you causing your dominance to stutter as he pounded your g spot.he didn’t even know the effect he was having on you cause he was so lost in the moment.glassy eyes thanking you for letting him fuck you.

➤ after that day though he was more comfortable with being on top.realize how much pleasure he gained from watching you completely fall apart kn his cock.begging for something incoherent as your warm squelching pussy sucks him in.he loves it

➤ he’s pretty big.not really thick but fairly long. I’d say about 7 inches.reaches all the right places while stretching your poor pussy out perfectly.his fingers are also very lining and slender, perfect for finding a snug home inside of you >.<

➤ he loves to fuck you on his desk.bending you over and “accidentally” knocking over a bunch of files from the Kira case he pounds his seed into you is like his sexual fantasy.he never thought he could care about something more then his work until he met you, and your pu-

➤ speaking of his work he loves when you give him head while he working.even better when other people aren’t in the room and it’s just you too so he can be as loud and whiny as he wants. He loves to shove his long fingers in your hair as he pushes your swollen lips down on his pleading cock. He’s gets too nervous to ask for you to give him head most of the time though ;(

[chuulyssa]

after dark. (l lawliet)

↷ A/N ─ apologies for slightly drifting off canon ryuzaki here. i mean, who doesn't like a dom detective /j also not proof-read yet ahhh i have school < / 3

also !! im switching to one post a week because of academic stress im sorry :(

★ COUNT ─ 1.6k

!! TAGS ─ l x reader, f!reader, dom!lawliet, smut, teasing, dry-humping, fingering, choking, degradation, praise kink, nicknames (good girl, bad girl, etc.), cockwarming, unprotected sex, p in v, slight (?) exhibitionism

★ PROLOGUE ─ you try to convince your workaholic boyfriend to take a break

SMUT, 18+, MDNI

You frowned at your boyfriend's hunched position on his chair, crouched in a highly uncomfortable posture with his knees bent against the palms of his hands and his head drooped in a trail of thought.

"Did you hear me?" you snapped your fingers in front of his eyes sternly.

He hummed in response, not looking up from the huge computer screen in front of him.

"Hello? Ryuzaki?" you repeated. "It's 2am. Bed. Now."

"Hm, no," he said softly. He lifted a finger to his chin and rubbed it thoughtfully, trying to decipher a new clue.

You felt frustrated at his lack of response, but you knew his work was equally important. Still, you leaned in closer to rest a hand on his shoulder.

"Honey, seriously, it's time for bed now. You've been at this for hours," you insisted.

He sighed, finally tearing his gaze away from the screen to meet your eyes.

"I can't just leave this case unsolved, Y/N," he explained in a small voice. "There is something here. Something really, really important. It seems so close to me yet so far away." Your concerned eyes met his tired ones. He continued, "This is crucial for the case. I cannot afford to slack off, and you know that, darling."

You took a deep breath in. Of course, you knew how significant this case was, not just to him but also to the entire police force. But that didn't mean you would allow him to jeopardize both his physical and mental health.

"You can pick it up tomorrow. Your health is much more important than this, Ryuzaki."

He shook his head vigorously and returned his attention to the computer screen. "I told you. I can't afford to slack off. At all."

Your frown deepened. So this was how he wanted to play. Well then, he'd get exactly what he wanted.

Without a word, you placed the still-filled coffee mug on the table a good distance away from him and tapped his bent knees. He raised his eyebrows and confusedly put his legs down. Immediately, you sat on his lap.

His fingers paused over the keyboard. Perfect. His attention was now fully on you.

"Is something wrong?"

You didn't answer, instead choosing to wrap your arms around his neck and lean in for a soft kiss. Ryuzaki widened his eyes and leaned backwards at the unexpected move.

"What are you doing?"

"Forcing you to take a rest," you said, kissing his lips once more.

He blinked but eventually gave in to the kiss. His hands ran up and down your back, knocking the fork off his desk. His fingers went up to your hair and got tangled in it. He pulled away shortly after to look at you in the eyes.

"Is this going to go where I think it will?" he asked, to which, you gave a little nod. He nodded back at you and shifted you so your back faced him, your ass rubbing against his crotch and instantly hardening it.

He slid a hand inside your pants and under your panties, brushing your clit. You gasped, taken aback by his bluntness.

"Ryu-"

"This is what you get for trying to distract me from my work, love," he whispered into your ear, his other hand holding you close to him so you couldn't escape.

His fingers worked faster on your clit, and you leaned your head back against the crook of his neck, arching your back at the blissful sensation. L slowly slid a finger inside you, and you let out a loud moan. His breath was heavy against your ear and his frequent whispers of "Yes, that's right. Such a good girl," and "So obedient for me. So good," drove you crazy.

Suddenly, he stopped. You whined and tugged at his shirt, gesturing for him to continue assaulting your pussy. He shook his head with a little smirk on his face and ran a finger all the way from your hips to your clit, dragging the fabric of your panties down. You bucked your hips up excitedly, allowing him to completely strip your bottom down.

You sat on his clothed crotch once more, anticipating the magic of his fingers on you again. But he merely caressed your thigh and typed something on his computer with the hand he was holding you with. You pouted and turned halfway to meet his eyes and dug your teeth into his neck, earning a barely heard intake of breath from him.

His fingers automatically slid back inside you while your teeth licked and sucked on the skin of his neck and collarbones. L turned you back around to face his desk and brought a hand out to choke you lightly from the front. You gagged, enjoying the feel of his pretty hands wrapped around your throat.

"You're being a naughty girl, Y/N L/N," L growled into your ear. "Do you really want punishment?"

You stopped. This was one of the rare moments where your boyfriend actually behaved this way - talking about punishment and ordering you to be submissive. Usually, he was one to settle down to lazy, morning sex. Needless to say, you were more than happy to accommodate his current desire. You nodded furiously.

L smiled before putting a hand in front of your face, covering it as if shielding it from something. Out of the blue, he stood up a little, making you skate forward. He gently laid your head on the desk so that your breasts were now practically floating in between the desk and his chair.

You were still seated on his lap, but he lifted his hips, tightening his grip on you so as to prevent you from falling over. L then frantically yet so calmly unbuttoned his pants and slid his boxers down with one hand. He pumped his thick, hard dick a few times before rubbing it against your pussy.

"Apologize," he commanded you.

Your words were incoherent as you tried desperately to say sorry to him for your behaviour. They were interrupted by loud whimpers and moans of need.

"Ryuzaki, please," you panted, your face pressed sideways into his desk. "I need you inside me- ah! Please, don't tease-"

"I said, apologize," he ordered firmly.

You were leaking now. The liquid from your stimulated pussy was dripping all over L's chair, but he did not seem to care. With tears in your eyes, you yelled out, "I- I'm sorry! Please!"

L nodded in satisfaction, patting your ass proudly. "Good girl. Now, a reward for my pretty baby."

He entered your pussy slowly and carefully. It seemed as if he wanted nothing more than to savour every inch of your tight, wet pussy. He knew your body so well - perhaps because of his detective tendencies. Because when his dick entered you, he immediately swung it around to hit your most sensitive spots, making you curl your toes in pleasure.

He pulled back and thrust back inside, repeating the process for what seemed like a thousand times, each thrust earning howls of praise from you. You were a screaming mess, hands running all over his desk, typing senseless words on his keyboard which you were sure would earn you another punishment soon.

"Ryuga, please, faster," you begged, and L obliged, picking up the pace by raising his hips even higher. The faster the movements became, the louder you began to babble.

He tried to keep as quiet as possible throughout the scene, occasionally letting out a few grunts as you told him to go rougher and harder on you. He smacked your ass once, making you shut up and enjoy him as he filled you in completely.

"Oh, god, you little slut," he said between breathless panting. "How horny are you for me, huh? Not even letting me work in peace," he smacked your ass and you cried out, your moans probably waking up the entire hotel.

L was now pounding into you with all his might, your body practically bouncing up and down on the desk uncomfortably. His dick was thrusting in and out of you and his balls were hitting your clit repeatedly at an inhumane speed.

"Now tell me who you are?" he slapped your ass hard.

"I'm- I'm your slut," you whimpered, trying not to pass out with the pleasure you were receiving.

"And what do you want?"

"You-"

He hit your ass even harder, making you yelp in pain.

"Wrong answer. Try again. What do you want?"

"For you to- to fill me up with your cum."

"That's right. Good girl," he growled, his hands latching onto your hips, and his nails digging into your skin to hold you in position. "I will come inside you now."

You nodded shakily. L let out a loud groan for the first time as he came hard into you, filling your pussy with his hot cum. You moaned along with him, jabbering inaudible sobs of his name, coming shortly after him.

For a while, the two of you stayed in the same exact position; your face pressed up against the table with your ass in his lap. His dick was still inside you, unwilling to let go of the warm feel of your pussy. Slowly, he pulled you by your neck back against his chest and pushed his chair forward.

He pressed backspace on his keyboard to delete the words you accidentally wrote, and, with one hand on the side of your hip even now, continued his investigation, leaving a kiss on your neck every few minutes. As the clock struck 4:30am, you slowly drifted off to dreamland, your boyfriend not paying any heed to your concerns. But you had learnt your lesson now, hadn't you?

© chuulyssa, 2024 - do not copy, plagiarize or repost my works on any platforms. do not translate.

[oatmealwrites]

Catch Kira, NOT Feelings! Ch. 6

Ch. 5 | Ch. 7

[series masterlist here]

[regular masterlist here]

Synopsis: Light is a master manipulator as per usual and quickly becomes suspicious of your 'relationship' with Ryuzaki. While a storm prevents him from coming to the task force meeting, the team locks in to the potential identity of Misa Amane being the Second Kira and what that means for all of your safety. Knowing that Light may be attempting to drive a wedge between you both, Ryuzaki asks you about the other things that couples do which might assist in convincing your task force colleagues that 'this' was real. The only issues? You're now convinced it may be becoming real too.

Tags: Light is a manipulator, you feel guilty af for lying to your team members, suggestive, mentions of sex, hair tugging, french kissing, dry humping, male erection, female arousal, mentions of masturbation, it's getting hot n heavy, MDNI, NSFW, 18+

Word Count: 10.7 k (SORRY)

a/n at end! enjoy~

~~~~~~

LIGHT POV

Light sits languidly at his desk, twirling his pen and furrowing his brows at his course materials that sit open before him. It’s late, long past 11pm and Misa has already left to go back home; a steady rain taps against his window as he enjoys the lack of company for the first time in a while. Ryuk’s presence doesn’t count anymore; he hovers in the air enjoying the sight of lightning that flashes with each roar of thunder, unamused as Light doesn’t give him any attention.

“You’re awfully quiet tonight.” Ryuk observes, turning to face the man.

Light sighs slightly, stopping the twirl of his pen and resting his cheek in the fat of his palm. “I’m thinking.”

Ryuk doesn’t say anything, but hovers closer to the desk and observes the way Light’s textbook remains open to the same page it was turned to 30 minutes ago. He’s seen Light calm and quiet with his thoughts before, but there’s an eerie demeanor to the way he sits that leaves Ryuk feeling eager to cure his boredom.

Light sits up a bit straighter when Ryuk reaches past him to grab an apple from the bowl his mother delivered earlier. “They’re faking it.”

Ryuk doesn’t stop his motion, popping the apple into his mouth and crunching loudly. “Hmm? Oh! You mean L and y/n?”

“Yes.” Light’s voice is curt and cold.

The shinigami over his shoulder pays no mind and continues chewing with his mouth open. “Mmm you must’ve been observing them very closely the other day to figure that out. Hehehe.”

Light doesn’t bother to entertain Ryuk’s suggestive teasing and rolls his eyes as the laughter behind his shoulder bellows loudly for only him to hear. Picking up his pen once more, he twirls it on his fingers again.

“Ok, but why does this matter so much? It’s not like it prevents you from killing people–”

“It prevents me from killing her.” Light interrupts.

The tone is harsh and quick, startling Ryuk as thunder roars beyond the glass patio door. Standing up and taking chunks of hair in his fingers, Light pulls slightly in frustration as his Shinigami companion watches in interest. 

“But I thought you wanted her on your side if you were to be caught. Why would you kill her now?”

Light sighs, releasing the grasp on his hair and looks at Ryuk. “I don’t want to, she’s committed no crime– but…” He looks down at his desk, the death note sitting neatly underneath his textbook. “If she’s going to stand in the way of a God… then I have no choice.”

Ryuk hums in better understanding and reaches to grab another apple from the basket, watching the way Light seems to work out a variety of situations in his head. 

“Mmm I see. And because she’s dating L suddenly, it puts her in an important spot at his side.”

Light scowls and runs a frustrated hand through his hair once more. “Yes, and only those in the task force know about it, meaning Ryuzaki has effectively guaranteed her safety! If she dies now, after no field work besides being with me, it’s a nail in my coffin!”

Light takes his textbook and throws it onto his bed, seething in anger as Ryuk enjoys the entertainment before him. 

“Damn him! He thinks he can just do whatever he wants… but I’ll show him– No! I’ll show the whole task force that ‘relationship’ is a fraud.” Light stands in the center of his room, shaking as he speaks and it makes Ryuk question the soundproofing of the walls. “Then, I’ll kill her. Right in front of him…. hehe..hahahaHAHAHA”

Ryuk pops the core of the fruit into his mouth and licks the juice running from the corner of his lips. “Mmm, I bet Misa will like the fact there’s no competition either.”

Light stops laughing and peers at the Shinigami before rolling his eyes. “Not like she matters much anyways– I’ll find a way to have her kill L and then I’ll deal with her and Rem afterwards.”

Walking back to the desk, he sits in the chair and looks at the way the death note now sits unhidden on the surface; he pulls out a regular notepad and grabs a mechanical pencil.

“But first I need to figure out how to prove this ‘relationship’ is fake… and maybe, if y/n kneels before the altar of Kira in submission, I’ll show her mercy. I mean if the task force votes to remove her for the egregious violation of trust, it’ll put her in a vulnerable spot for where to put her faith…” He taps his pencil tip to the paper a few times in idle thought. “But first– I need to figure out why Ryuzaki would go this far just to protect her.”

Ryuk takes the empty fruit bowl and shakes it upside down, grunting at the fact there were no more apples left for him to enjoy. A lightning strike draws his attention back outside before he speaks to the young man again. “Maybe he’s just a good boss.”

Light scoffs and twirls his mechanical pencil in a similar fashion to how he did the pen earlier. “Yea right. The hours he makes everyone work, the secrecy of everything– even Ukita died on the job. So it doesn’t make sense he would do any special treatment for someone... He even sent Matsuda and I to Aoyama with no hesitation so–”

Light cuts himself off and stares down at the notepad in awe as Ryuk watches two drops of rain race down the glass door, silently rooting for the left one to reach the bottom first. When thunder echoes outside he notices the lack of Light’s voice and turns back around. 

“Wait, you stopped talking. What happened?”

Light doesn’t say anything; his head hangs low and his shoulders jerk as a few chuckles escape his lips in an erratic manner. The light giggles turn into a fit of laughter as he throws his neck back and squints his eyes shut in humor. Feeling left out of an inside joke Ryuk ushers forward. 

“What? Whaaat? Tell me.”

A hand on his forehead as the laughter slows down, Light looks down at his notepad. “Ahhh. It’s not fake at all, is it Ryuzaki?!”

Ryuk scrunches his face and looks at the man with irritation growing evident; he wants to be entertained, not left out. He lifts a hand and scratches his face in confusion. “You don’t make sense… just a moment ago you said the relationship was staged.”

Light wipes a tear from his eyes and spins in his chair to sit with better posture as he drafts a variety of notes onto the paper. “The whole thing is fake– just not to him.”

Ryuk doesn’t say anything, not bothering to ask for proof as he knows the human in front of him will run his mouth and explain it anyways. On cue, Light taps his paper with the pencil as he opens his mouth once more. 

“I’ve known y/n longer than he has, a fact that gets under his skin and also puts him at a severe disadvantage.” He taps a list of names on the paper— a list of your most recent exes he can remember. “In all the relationships I’ve seen her in, she’s never acted like this.”

Ryuk peers at the names with slight interest but remains silent. “She’s never done excessive PDA, and now they’re making out in public. She’s always separated her work and personal life, and now she’s dating her boss. She’s also been strapped for cash, and now she’s bringing him cookies. The whole thing reeks of trying to prove a point in an obvious and gaudy fashion.”

Peering at the bullet points of dating habits, Ryuk shrugs again, not quite on the same page. “So this proves it’s fake, right?”

“Fake to her.” Light corrects, spinning back in his chair to continue scribbling. 

“But Ryuzaki would never make such an attempt to protect anyone besides himself. Not letting her go to Aoyama, showing up on campus suddenly, projecting their ‘relationship’ makes so little rational sense.”

“That’s true. That guy is just as methodical and stuck up as you Light!” Ryuk chuckles at his own joke while the man rolls his eyes.

“Sure–” Light concedes with grit teeth. “But it also means that there’s no logical reason for him to do this.”

“Ok…? So why would he…?”

Light scoffs and raises an eyebrow himself. “It’s stupid really; to be honest I don’t know why he would do it for this reason anyways…”

Circling a word at the center of the page, he taps his pencil against the phrase with a confused and lost look in his eyes. ‘Love’ 

[Back at task force – Your POV]

“And based on this sentence,” you raise your finger to trace the highlighted portion of the printed transcript, “we can infer that the whole ‘sharing powers’ thing is greatly exaggerated.”

Matsuda awes next to you as you explain the linguistics behind the most recent piece of evidence from the Second Kira– an audio tape mailed to Sakura TV postmarked two days ago. The audio has been transcribed into a few sentences on the paper in your hands; the message stating the Second Kira will no longer make public statements within the name of ‘Kira’ and will do what they can to earn the approval of the God– offering to punish more criminals and even ‘share the power’ with other devoted followers.

You tap your finger and open the cap of your highlighter to mark another portion of the lines for underlying meanings; the wording seems like a combination of syntax from Kira and the Second. 

“Nice catch there…” Aizawa leans down to point to another line as you begin explaining a separate portion of the script. 

A light rain patters at the hotel windows as the lingering storm from last night refuses to let up; Ryuzaki sits at the coffee table across the room but his gaze remains on you at the kitchen counter. Aizawa and Matsuda flank both your sides as you calmly pick apart the printed transcript on the wooden surface; Light remains absent, still having another hour in his evening lecture before he rejoins the group. 

Matsuda ‘ooos’ once more when you stand up, having completed your interpretation of the message splayed in front of you. “Woa, that’s an impressive deduction… I can't believe I didn’t catch it.”

You shrug and trace the lines once more, pausing to summarize them. “Well, if Kira could pass their powers on to people, why would they have chosen someone they never met? You can’t ensure allegiance or ability– the whole thing would be too risky.”

Despite telling this to Matsuda and Aizawa, Ryuzaki sits across the room listening to every detail. “So the Second Kira wasn’t ‘chosen’ ; it also limits the likelihood they can pass their ‘powers’ down to others. This would mean they came into power naturally rather than through succession. Especially when you consider the ego of the first Kira.”

Matsuda nods in approval and Mr. Yagami signals for the groups to merge once again; he makes space for Ryuzaki to resume the joint meeting. Taking your usual spot on the couch, you watch the way L flicks the TV screen to show the written audio transcript.

“You had already told me your interpretation earlier, y/n– but hearing it again there’s a few points we need to discuss.”

The group hums and gathers their assorted documents, ready to listen to his suggestion. “We have to entertain the possibility that the murder…’weapon’ has the ability to be yielded by more than one person. And that this ‘power’ may be the reference within the message.”

You suck the inside of your cheek between your molars and reflect on the possibility; the fact no one has seen the murder weapon throws an uncomfortable wrench into the plan. A ‘power’ with the ability to kill with only a name and face certainly leans towards the divine and supernatural. You give a slight nod to Ryuzaki, the shared usage of ‘notebooks’ still remains private to only you.

The group remains silent in thought, everyone having no collective idea what the real cause of death could be. With a slight sigh, Ryuzaki scans the faces of the task force and turns to Mogi. “Regardless, it’s something important for everyone to keep in mind. Mogi, you have collected the forensics evidence, please divulge further.”

With an exhale, the man stands up and takes the remote from L before standing beside the TV screen and flipping to the next image.

“There were multiple traces of DNA on the tapes sent which caused some delays. Any postal service workers were filtered out upon looking at their work schedules which eventually left the evidence of two different women.”

He flips to an image of a woman you don’t recognize; her hair is cut short and splays in a variety of directions while her face adorns gothic makeup. “Her evidence showed up the most predominantly on the first few tapes. Saliva, finger prints, everything that would show her being the primary sender.”

Matsuda stands up excitedly. “So we got her! We got the Second Kira!”

“Not so fast.” Mr. Yagami leans back in his seat and motions for Matsuda to sit back down. “Please continue Mogi.”

The man coughs slightly and flips to the next image; a set of other video tapes litter the screen. “Her DNA didn’t match any criminal records, but it did match a series of occult videos sent to a variety of news stations. Most of them are fake or doctored as some sort of prank.”

Matsuda sinks slowly back down with a slight blush on his cheeks in embarrassment. 

Mogi flips to an image of the woman’s schedule. “Given her credit card statement, work schedule, and parental alibi… there’s limited room for her to commit any of the murders given the lack of time to access criminal information.”

Before the group can sigh in slight defeat, he flips to an image of another woman– one you recognize.

“Hey. I know her…” You sit upright and examine the doll-like face of the girl on the screen.

L leans in slightly, his face holds intrigue but the slight tremor in his body language hints a bit of anxiety. “Have you seen her on campus?”

You shake your head and examine her face another moment before turning to the group. “No, nothing like that. She’s a model I’m pretty sure… and she’s been in a few movies.”

Ryuzaki sits back slightly and nods once, taking in your response before nodding for Mogi to continue once again.

“Well, you’re right about that. This is Misa Amane, an upcoming celebrity whose DNA was already in the court system as a victim– her parents were murdered and she went through the trials against the perpetrator...”

You look between Mogi and Ryuzaki with concern at his pause. “Wait… I recognize this case; wasn’t it thrown out?”

Ryuzaki sits up right to secure a small plate of strawberry cake and pops the fruit garnish on top into his mouth; he speaks with his mouth open as he chews. “Exactly. The man was acquitted and shortly after Kira came to power, he died of a heart attack.”

The allegiance to Kira is immediately established and you sit back into your seat. In a strange sense, you kinda feel bad for her; if your family was killed and the murderer walked free from an inefficient judicial system…maybe you would have sympathy for Kira as we–

Ok, what are you thinking? Kira has killed more than just criminals; FBI agents and even members of this task force have been murdered. 

You shake off the thought and give Mogi your full attention once more as Ryuzaki watches your expression with uncomfortable focus.

“The tapes had pollen from flowers local to her hometown, and when we seized a few assets from her agent– without her knowledge– we matched her notebooks to the paper used in the letters. Not only did the ink match, but the handwriting too.” 

Mogi opens a manilla folder that had been tucked under his arm and places it on the coffee table in front of everyone. “Her credit card statements. There’s receipts of train ticket purchases that match the postage locations of the stamps from the Sakura TV demands.”

Aizawa crosses his arms. “Ok, just to push back on this… is it possible that she is also just an occult prankster? Kira could’ve put either one up to sending these tapes– like how they manipulated the acts of the criminals in jail before they died.”

Ryuzaki hums slightly, the fork in his mouth and frosting coating part of his lips and the sight makes you squirm slightly. “Given there have been multiple tapes sent in response to our demands and they haven’t died yet, we can assume they are doing this willingly…” He pauses and runs his tongue over his bottom lip to get the lost sugar. “Though if we detain one… there’s a chance Kira will kill one, or both, to avoid them from speaking out.”

You stare back at the image to examine her appearance again, and to avoid staring at the slutty way Ryuzaki cleans his fork of any remaining cream. 

Ugh. He doesn’t even know how it looks. 

You turn your attention back to the image of Misa and think for a moment. “There’s something else… aha!” You reach in your bag to pull out your laptop while the group of men watch you open the lid and type in your password.

Mr. Yagami sits forward to grab a mug of coffee from Watari’s tray. “Did you find something y/n?”

“Kinda…. Ah! Here it is!” You spin the laptop around and the men all lean in to get a better look.

“That looks delicious…?” Mogi mumbles in confusion from his still standing position.

You roll your eyes at the way Matsuda is nearly drooling. “Ok, but besides the image of the dessert, this is Misa’s social media page.”

Mr. Yagami blinks, completely lost. “Uh, ok?”

L sits forward and expands the image before looking up at you. “This is one of the cafes you and Light were talking about in Aoyama.”

You grin at him, slightly flush from his memory of you mentioning it in a conversation that he wasn’t even part of, before nodding and pointing to the post date and location. “Exactly! While it was posted a few days after Light and Matsuda were walking in Aoyama… it’s awfully convenient to post it on the same day we received the message that the Second Kira had found Kira.”

The group hums with excitement; everyone closer to finding Kira than ever before. Ryuzaki slips the last bite of cake into his mouth and places the saucer back onto the coffee table with a gentle touch. 

“However, this doesn’t inherently look very good for your son, Mr. Yagami.”

The group’s energy falters and you shift uncomfortably in your seats, the tension between the two men immediately rising once again. 

“Excuse me? Even if she was in Aoyama the same day as Light, Matsuda was with him the whole time!”

On cue, Matsuda jumps up to the chief’s defense. “That’s right Ryuzaki! Light never spoke to anyone who matches her photograph.”

Opting to reach for a plate of sugar cubes, he slides a few blocks into a warm mug of tea. “Mogi– please explain.”

Swallowing uncomfortably, you watch the way Mogi nervously loosens the collar on his button up and Mr. Yagami’s glare is intense. 

“What? Mogi... what is he talking about?!”

Examining the way everyone else looks at Mogi with concern, you deduce that L had only told you about his assignment trailing Light. 

“I had him follow your son after a few meetings, this woman has come to your house several times now.”

Mr. Yagami sputters at the way Ryuzaki speaks on Mogi’s behalf, abruptly turning between the men in shock and anger. “You what?”

Matsuda and Aizawa rise to their feet, each immediately standing between the men as Mr. Yagami tries to push forward and reach the collar of L’s shirt. The coffee table slides as the group begins to scuffle; you lift your feet to avoid the scattered mugs that topple onto the floor.

“You had our colleagues spy on my family? What gives you the right– after everything?!” Your mentor booms as Aizawa puts his arm out in front to block his movements.

L stands idly, Matsuda standing in front regardless. “Your son is still the most convincing suspect we have so far. Do you want to catch Kira or not?”

Mr. Yagami scoffs and you stand up now as well, picking up your bag to avoid the coffee puddle that threatens to stain the fabric. Moving slightly, you sling it over the back of the loveseat Ryuzaki stands in front of and watch the way Mr. Yagami scoffs with an exhale of hot breath.

“This threatens to break the very trust of this group! If I’m not a suspect, you should tell me when you act in secret.”

You swallow thickly and shift your weight awkwardly, the images of your very public makeout the other day now flooding your mind. The lack of your own honesty with the group leaves you biting your tongue and remaining silent. 

“Your son may have access to the information you have; this was done to prevent any suspicion and it worked.” L replies cooly, not needing Matsuda to hold him back.

“And if you told me, I could’ve done more to figure out why she visited! Because of that, Light looks even more guilty without having the opportunity to explain anything!”

Ryuzaki sighs slightly. “We will give him ample time to clear his own name with his actions, but for now please calm down– you need to act rationally.”

Mr. Yagami tilts his head down and Aizawa keeps him steady for a moment before the chief exhales slowly and sinks into the sofa. Defeat written on his face, the older man looks down at his hands with a forlorn expression. 

“I’m sorry for my outburst everyone… I didn’t mean to question the trustworthiness of this group… It’s just hard to hear you speak so casually that my son could be–” his words die before he can even say ‘Kira.’

Aizawa moves to sit back down and the lingering tension in the air hangs with less intensity than before. Matsuda takes a deep breath and sits beside the chief as Mogi stands in an awkward and apologetic silence in front of the TV.

You slowly leave your original position from beside Ryuzaki and catch his gaze for a moment before returning to your spot on the couch; the small moment of eye contact isn’t lost on your company either.

“You’ve been acting in secret…but also have been vulnerable with us, Ryuzaki.” Mr. Yagami looks up, a calmer expression on his face. “I’m grateful you’ve been able to be honest about your relationship… and I understand that some acts in finding Kira may require a bit more privacy. Please, forgive my outburst.”

Ah, shit.

Your heart strings tug when your mentor offers you a somber look that you can’t quite discern and Ryuzaki stares at you from his seat. It’s awkward and uncomfortable, but you offer a small smile and shrug your shoulders slightly.

“I completely understand your feelings Mr. Yagami. I will keep them in mind as we continue our mission.” L offers before looking back to the group.

You squirm in your seat, feeling like utter shit as the next steps of the plan are being discussed. 

“I’ll keep my public appearances to an even stricter minimum than before.” Ryuzaki begins, taking a fresh mug of tea since his other one was knocked to the floor a few moments ago. “If Miss Amane has this… ‘power’ to kill with a name and face, I’ll have to only leave the headquarters under extremely coordinated events. You all should consider the same.”

Matsuda looks at the file notes on the woman before raising his gaze to examine you; a lighter tone in his voice as he attempts to dissolve any remaining tension. “Ha! That might make date night awkward huh, y/n!”

You pause, the documents frozen in your hands as a hot blush spreads across your face. “Oh, yea! Haha… definitely will make it a bit harder.”

A forced laugh escapes your lips as the other members roll their eyes at his attempt at humor; you turn your attention to Ryuzaki who sits completely complacent with the task force discussing your ‘relationship’. In a poor attempt at morse code, you blink a few times as signal to help you out. 

He tilts his head for a moment before finally catching on and sitting up straighter to place his mug back on the table. “O-Oh, right! Our love life will take a hit, but lucky for us– y/n and I usually enjoy our time spent here in privacy.”

…

The room is dead silent except for the small clatter of a ceramic dessert plate Ryuzaki picks up from the coffee table. How in the world he managed to make the atmosphere WORSE is beyond you. 

Matsuda coughs slightly and awkwardly looks towards the bedroom door on the other side of the room. “You mean like… when you guys go in there?”

Maybe you should’ve just gone to Aoyama anyway and took your chances with the Second Kira’s wrath and L’s disappointment. Because being dead sounds a lot better than being here right now. 

You raise your hands up in defense, silently wondering what karma you must have to be in this situation. “No! We don’t do anything in there–”

“Yes, please be rest assured that y/n and I do not do anything intimate there…” Ryuzaki interrupts before taking a bite of his pastry. “–while the group is here of course.”

Silence falls on the group once more and Mr. Yagami can’t bring himself to make eye contact with you; Aizawa looks slowly between you and L in horror. “So… you guys do it in there once we leave?”

“Is that why you always leave last, y/n?” Mogi asks quietly. 

Your words choke in your throat and you turn to Ryuzaki who gives you a neutral expression; there’s not an ounce of worry on his face as his large eyes slowly blink at you as if you were describing the weather.

“What? N-No! We just… I uhhh…” You take a deep breath. “Can we get back to catching Kira?”

“Yes, please.” Mr. Yagami immediately sighs and keeps his gaze on the papers in his hands. 

“Of course. We can’t arrest Misa right away anyways– it would be best to give Light some time to prove his innocence and for us to construct a place that could even hold the Second Kira if it is Ms. Amane.” L explains cooly, gazing at the older man. “Mogi will still be asked to trail your son, if that’s alright.”

Mr. Yagami sighs but nods regardless. “I understand, it’s for his own good.”

You nod slowly, your heart still pounding in your chest as a hot blush remains tattooed to your cheeks. 

“So… we keep this a secret from him for a bit? At least until we gain something that could prove a lack of connection to Misa?” Matsuda asks, flipping through her headshots. 

“Precisely. We will tell him about the tapes and our analysis of them, but Misa and the other woman will remain unmentioned for the time being.”

The meeting continues as planned, going through various pieces of evidence against Misa as you draft legal demands from her agent; a ‘drug’s bust’ is the guise the group has decided on using. Gentle rain from earlier picks up into a storm similar to that of last night and thunder roars outside as the group passes around various papers and evidence bags amongst each other.

You finish reviewing a final explanation of the most recent Second Kira tape once more before the power flicks slightly. A few whistles escape the men as the lights come back on and crashes of thunder shake the window panes.

Moving to place your annotated papers back on the table, a shrill ringtone emits from your bag. A sheepish apology at Ryuzaki as you forgot to put it on mute, you move to decline it before raising an eyebrow at the caller ID.

“It’s Light.”

Mr. Yagami looks up at you and then peers at his watch. “He’s running 20 minutes behind…”

Ryuzaki motions for you to answer and you lift the device to your ear and repack your bag. “Light? What’s up?”

“Ah, y/n I’m glad you answered. I’m still on campus.”

You pause and look up at the wall clock, eyes wide in shock as you stand upright. “Still? I thought your classes were done almost an hour ago.”

“Several metro lines are down from the storm, apparently there was an accident at a major transfer station.”

“So, you’re not coming tonight?” You shrug when the group gives you a concerned look.

“I don’t think so.. Agh this is so frustrating. I don’t want to inconvenience Ryuzaki or my father about filling me in either….”

You pause and take the phone from its tucked spot on your shoulder and flip it to rest against your opposite ear. “That’s alright, I can let you know what you missed.”

“Really? You’re a lifesaver y/n.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m sure you’d do the same for me anyways.”

“I’ll take you to that dessert place not far off campus, my treat.”

The offer makes you pause slightly, blinking slowly as his invitation catches you off guard. It’s not like you’ve never gone to cute cafes or gotten lunch– the both of you used to do it regularly when you worked alongside his father under regular hours– but there’s a weird feeling in your gut that’s not describable.

“Y-You don’t have to do that…” Ryuzaki’s eyes follow your every movement and he listens intently to each phrase that leaves your lips.

“I want to though… take it as a token of appreciation. But if you’re too busy to go through the meeting notes… I can always ask Matsuda, I suppose.”

You shake your head as if he could see your body language and sigh slightly into the receiver, brushing off the strange anxiety that creeps on your shoulders. “It’s fine, that plan works for me. I have a 2 hour break tomorrow anyways.”

The group watches in silence and shrugs amongst themselves as they raise eyebrows at the content of the conversation. When you end the call and slide the phone back into your bag, all eyes are on you.

Mr. Yagami sits forward. “Is Light ok?”

You reach for your coffee mug and down half the contents. “Huh? Oh yea, his train line is closed for the storm so he’s just going to head home.”

You lean back in your seat and Ryuzaki purses his lips slightly, he moves to speak but waits a moment. “Let’s take a short recess. All of you confirm your ways home are not compromised and then we can wrap up this meeting early considering the weather.”

Hums of approval break out and the men separate to call home, check traffic reports, and monitor the transit line closures. Ryuzaki stands and motions to follow him; he pauses at the bedroom door and opts to awkwardly shuffle into the kitchen area when Aizawa shoots him a concerned glance. 

You pivot to stand beside him and shiver when a few of the other men raise a slight eyebrow before returning to their phone calls. “What’s going on? Why can’t we just–”

“What else did Light say?” Ryuzaki interrupts and whispers in a hushed tone.

Blinking, you look behind to ensure you’re out of earshot and shrug slightly. “He asked if I could go over the meeting notes of tonight so he wouldn’t inconvenience you or his dad.”

“Right–” L rolls his eyes slightly and scoffs. “Anything else?”

“Mmm, he offered to take me to a dessert cafe as payment.”

“And you accepted?”

You pause slightly and keep your eye on the distance of the other members to your conversation. “Yea? Why wouldn’t I–” oh.

You suck in your lower lip awkwardly while Ryuzaki narrows his eyes. “Please think these things through thoroughly. It’s obvious he’s onto us, and he’s looking for an opening to wedge himself into.”

It’s not exactly your best moment, but you offer a slight defense. “It’s not something that’s inherently damning. Going with a man who isn’t my uh… ‘boyfriend’ is weird, but it’s Light. We’ve already gone to cafes and such platonically, so if he’s trying to prove something here, it won’t work.”

Ryuzaki’s glare narrows slightly at your mention of previous excursions with the man, but concedes the point. “Regardless, we need to ensure that ‘this’ remains stable; our lives are on the line.”

You nearly roll your eyes at the constant reminder but nod in agreement nonetheless. “I’m aware, but what else is there to prove? The group already knows we're together.”

“We need to make it more believable.”

Pausing slightly, you open your eyes in shock. “More believable? How do we even manage that? It would be… something that would happen privately.” A blush spreads across your face and your voice lowers quietly. 

“That’s fine then, we’ll have one of them walk in on us.”

…what.

“W-wait..and what exactly are they going to be walking in on?”

Ryuzaki blinks once, the implication of his suggestion now warming his cheeks a pale pink. “Well… a couple-thing I suppose. We’ll have to draft a plan about it– If Light is successful in proving that we aren’t actually dating but instead plotting his arrest behind everyone's back… the entire task force dynamic will crumble.”

A heavy weight pushes on your shoulders and you bite your lip in thought. “I know, I know. But having someone… walk in will require a careful plan on our part if we’re actually going to do this.”

L has seemingly no issue with the risk of mortification at your colleagues walking in on the two of you potentially “fucking” and the air escapes your lungs in exhaustion. There’s no way this conversation is real, and thunder roars overhead as you silently attempt to wake yourself up from this dream. Before you can offer another suggestion, a cough rings out awkwardly as Mogi signals that the group is ready to resume. 

You offer a polite smile and pivot next to Ryuzaki as you walk back to your seat. “Just.. give me some time to think about it ok?”

The meeting resumes as it had prior; finalizing a plan for Sakura TV to be wary if any more tapes arrive, requesting Misa’s upcoming schedules from her agent, and drafting a request to the dessert cafe in Aoyama for their interior CCTV access.

The rain picks up and the wind howls beyond the window panes with lightning occasionally painting the interior hotel walls with a pale glow. Watari collects residual coffee cups from the table and offers to prepare another pot before the group sleepily declines.

You flip through the credit card statements of Misa while idly replaying the invitation Light offered over the phone. The more you considered it, the more you tried to convince yourself you were simply overthinking. The fact he had called you and not his father isn’t inherently strange, but it does leave an uneasy feeling in your gut.

Digging your chin into the casual university sweatshirt you adorn, you silently take in your own outfit. Coming straight from class, you forwent changing into your professional clothes and sit at the meeting in a pair of jeans with a ribbed white tee under your crewneck. It would seem out of place if Ryuzaki wasn’t sitting in his usual spot dressed equally as comfortably; on instinct he looks up from his own papers and meets your gaze before you peel your eyes back down.

Another 45 minutes go by until the yawns of the group cannot be suppressed by the thunder and Ryuzaki looks up to adjourn the meeting for the night. Despite it being earlier than your usual evenings, fatigue is evident on the faces of everyone. 

Tired limbs stretch upright and slowly pack their belongings as the men bundle up and check the window to prepare for the inclement weather outside. Sliding a few folders into your bag, you pause when Watari offers you your jacket. “Actually, can I speak with you Ryuzaki?” You turn towards the man as he peers out the window at the rain.

“Of course.”

Aizawa slings his messenger bag over his shoulder and looks between the both of you with a concerned glance before staring at the bedroom door on the other side of the room.

You roll your eyes. “Not for that.” you turn back to L; his attention now fully on you. “I have an assignment and it’s about a case you worked on.”

Aizawa seems content with the explanation and gives Matsuda a slight nudge when the men slowly file out of the hotel suite. L tilts his head slightly, “Which case? BB murder? Or maybe–”

When the door clicks shut you exhale slightly with a light chuckle. “There is no assignment.”

“...Oh.”

Placing your bag back down in front of the couch, you pivot to walk back towards the bedroom at the other end of the room. “I actually have an idea that could work… regarding what we spoke about earlier. If someone hears this, I doubt they’ll question us being together.”

Even saying it outloud is enough to make your ears red. When you initially joined the task force, you assumed it would wrap up with the swift arrest of Kira while each of the men wrote you glowing letters of recommendation– not with you opening the bedroom door of L’s suite and ushering him inside for a private meeting, still miles away from catching the serial killer.

“Watari, can you assist with this actually?”

The older gentleman walks around from his position at the kitchen counter, gently stacking dirty dishes before he arrives in the living room. “Of course, y/n. What can I assist with?”

Saying the request is mortifying, but it’s not like you have many options at this point anyways. A deep breath in, you gesture to the room. “Can you just stay out here? Not super close to the door, but maybe by the couches? I want to see something.”

The man nods once and retreats to the coffee table to organize the glassware there and you motion for Ryuzaki to enter the bedroom. 

It’s awkward, more than you want it to be. L walks inside and looks expectedly at you as your hands click the door shut; shuffling to the side of the bed, you release a long exhale. “Ok, I was thinking about what you said earlier… about the uhh ‘next step’ and I’m ready with a plan.”

Ryuzaki’s eyes widen in surprise, an expression of shock you’re not sure you’ve ever seen. He coughs slightly and looks between you and the bed, taking a moment to digest what was happening. 

“Oh, I see. To be honest I thought you would need more time… and I’m not exactly prepared for this..” He walks over and runs his hands over the fabric of the comforter to ground himself. “I’m not exactly the most experienced, but I’m ready.”

You stand still, frozen as he then slowly leans forward.

Huh.

HUH.

You sputter and lift your hands. “Wait– what?”

“What.” Ryuzaki immediately parrots and leans back to his previous position. 

“What… are you doing?”

“What are you doing?” He repeats once more.

Blinking slightly and raising an eyebrow at his behavior, you tilt your head in suspicion but brush it off. “Uh, let me explain the plan first, yea?”

Ryuzaki nods in the least-casual forced-casual manner possible. “Yes, of course.”

You scoff lightly in amusement but a grin works its way onto your lips regardless. “Alright, you’re going to need some acting skills for this.”

Without waiting for his answer, you kick off your shoes and climb onto the bed. Sitting near the pillows, you place your hand on the wall and knock once or twice before humming in approval; Ryuzaki stands motionless beside you. “I’m having slight difficulty following your lead, y/n.”

“Patience–” you shush him.

He closes his lips and swallows slightly, Adam’s apple bobbing as he remains frozen in place. Rocking your weight forward slightly, you push the headboard of the bed into the adjacent wall and hum in satisfaction when a ‘thud’ rings out from the motion. Taking a moment to test the movement, you sway to a steadier rhythm and nudge the wooden furniture against the wall over and over again.

Swallowing any remaining pride, you look away from the man next to you and open your mouth to release an awkwardly forced moan. “Aaahhhh–”

This is fucking ridiculous. 

A chuckle almost escapes Ryuzaki’s lips, but it passes as a mixture of a cough and gruff exhale; you slow down to a halt and look at him with cheeks bright red in embarrassment and frustration. “

What?” you seethe at him in frustration; actions coming to a halt. 

He glances at the way your hands remain firmly grasped to the headboard and tightens his lips into a tight line. “You need to make it believable.”

His response isn’t one you expect, and in your state of surprise, you peel backwards off the headboard and sit still in the center of the bed. “Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?”

Clearly amused but pretending not to be, he climbs onto the plush comforter and gives you a knowing look. “Seriously? The only people who make noises like that are adult film actors on set– there’s no way it would convince a room of trained detectives that you were…enjoying yourself.”

You open your mouth for a moment before shutting it in defeat. Sure he has a point, but it’s not like you could casually give the performance of a lifetime while being fully clothed and a respectful 5 feet apart.

A huff escapes you as he walks on his knees up to the base of the headboard and does a few sample taps against the wall. “And how else would you like me to sound–”

“Let’s focus on the task at hand.” He interrupts, changing the topic slightly.

Relinquishing the subtle dig at your acting skills, you pivot to stand up and give a few jumps to the mattress. 

God this is so damn childish. The act of being caught doing this would be worse than actually being caught having sex with him. 

Wait. what. 

The joint act of him swinging the bed into the wall while you hop up and down makes you recall a variety of undergraduate memories you wished would stay hidden. Banging against the wall, fake and forced moans, and the very real company only separated by plaster and drywall makes you cringe.

Ryuzaki doesn’t seem to mind any of it, remaining silent as he throws his shoulder into the swing and jerks the furniture forward. You pause and land lightly on your feet; throwing your sweatshirt over your head from the heat, you adjust the white tee underneath and glance at the man underneath you.

“Ok, now you’re not being believable.”

He pauses immediately and looks up at you with a face of frustration. “Hm? What else is there to this…?”

“You’re too quiet. I mean we’re making all this noise but you haven’t made a sound.”

Ryuzaki opens his mouth but promptly shuts it; his mind reeling a million different scenarios as a hot blush spreads across his cheeks. He turns the other way and keeps his lips in a tight line while you raise an eyebrow at his silence.

He gives a few pushes to the bed with half effort, obviously trying to avoid making a sound with his mouth; unconvinced you raise your foot from your standing position above his and kick his side slightly.

“Hey. What are you doing? I thought you said we needed to make this believable.”

He doesn’t answer and continues half-assing his motion; impatient you raise your foot again but slip when he suddenly jerks forward to slide the bed once again.

“Woa– S-SHIT”

You topple forward and crash down onto him in the blink of an eye, silently taking a moment to see if you can feel your limbs still. Regarding yourself unscathed, you look down at the very stunned Ryuzaki who lays directly beneath you. 

“Was this… part of your plan?” He murmurs quietly. 

Stuttering, you sit up straight but he raises his knees behind you to keep you stuck in the base of his lap.

Fuck.

No words can form on your tongue as the position creates a TV static to echo through your mind; surprise turning into intrigue, L looks up at you with a glaze over his eyes and the tug of a smirk on his lips.

“Please use your words, y/n. I might have amazing deductive abilities, but I’m not a mind reader.”

Scoffing you grab the fabric of the comforter in frustration, the fucker was enjoying this. “I didn’t mean to trip.”

“Plans rarely go according to how we expect them to.” He pauses and keeps his gaze on you. “But since you did fall, how would your… plan move forward from here?”

“What?” You mutter incredulously. The whole thing was an accident, but he seems to be interested in watching you squirm more than anything else.

He sits there in a petty silence, expecting you to talk your way out of the situation while your embarrassment turns to frustration. Ok while yes, you would be lying if you said the tension didn’t turn you on at all, the blurred lines of your charade creates a risky situation that should be avoided. 

Kissing at the quad was spontaneous and already pushing the boundaries of what this ‘fake relationship’ currently signified as. Sitting on his lap with no one else in the room was a whole different ball game. 

“You’re overthinking.” His voice cuts through.

You sigh and turn towards the door. “How can I not? It’s not like this situation leaves much up to the imagination if someone were to walk in.”

“Humor me.”

Seriously? 

It feels strange to have the tables turned on you. When you had taken the initiative to kiss him in front of Light, it was Ryuzaki who stood before you completely at your will; sitting above him while his dark eyes bore into yours, trying to push even further made you furrow your brows in contemplation.

The whole thing is fake right? It doesn’t make any sense for him to care so much if Light asks you to a cafe and it makes even less rational sense for him to want to practice getting caught. Catching Kira takes more than playing by the books though, and watching the way his pupils are dilated to the size of saucers makes you begin to want something else. Something more. 

You don’t know what he wants from you at this point, but sitting here, with him, as the storm roars outside and the only thing illuminating the bedroom are the table lamps and moonlight, you decide to act on what you want for once. 

It’s quick, so fast that even Ryuzaki takes a moment to blink before realizing that you were leaning down to kiss his lips. Hands cupping his cheeks, you tilt your head and slide down his thighs bit more to sit in a neat straddle of his lap.

He doesn’t freeze like the time you kissed him on the campus, instead deft hands rest neatly on your waist as he pushes against your mouth with equal force. Your nose tickles his cheek as you move more pressure and you savor the sweet flavor of his lips; his mouth chases yours when you part to tilt your head to the other side. 

It’s hot, and you can feel his cock stiffening in his jeans with every rock of your hips as you both effectively dry hump. Slithering your tongue out slightly, you run a gentle lick across his bottom lip; pulling back when he freezes.

About to end the entire moment in mortification, Ryuzaki slips his index and middle fingers in the belt loops of your jeans to keep you still above him. Panting, he gazes up at you with hazy eyes. “Why do you do that? You did it the other day… on campus. Wh– What does it signify?”

Dark hair tickles his cheeks and his eyes are locked solely on you; the pressure in his jeans rutting against your aching cunt isn’t lost on you either. It feels like you’re suffocating in a tug-of-war between rationality and desire. 

Of course, the urge for more wins.

You wet your bottom lip with your tongue and Ryuzaki shamefully stares at the action while waiting for an explanation. No words leave your mouth; instead you take your thumbs from where they rested on his cheeks and force them between his lips. Taping on his canines once with them, you push his jaw down and lean forward to place your tongue in his mouth.

“Hmpfhh-”

Ryuzaki doesn’t mind being gagged by your tongue; he happily exhales through his nose and tugs you further up on his lap as his erection grinds painfully against the fly of his jeans. You don’t fare much better above him as the saturated mess of your panties leaves a warm and sticky sensation between the plush of your thighs. 

Sugar and black tea is the taste of his tongue as you grind your own against it before exploring his molars and pursuing your lips further to gain more access. Soft groans leave your throat and escape his own lips; no longer sounding like a staged pornoc– but guttural and deep.

Any other person would have their hands on your ass already, but Ryuzaki keeps his hands at a constrained position at your tailbone, as if it was painful for him to keep them still. Remaining a gentleman nonetheless, he doesn’t move them any further. 

It’s bad. The way you grind against him faster and tilt his head back with the force of your mouth. It’s even worse when he pushes you back and a string of saliva connects your lips before snapping.

“Haa.. I see.” He pants, not bothering to discuss his very obvious and raging boner. “So, if I wanted to do that… I would–” Ryuzaki tugs your head back in and sits upright to connect your lips once more. 

He runs his tongue over your lips and in an act of coyness, you don’t bother opening your mouth. Ryuzaki pulls back with an analytical expression before tapping your hip as if he just had a moment of clarity. “Ah, that’s right! You did this…”

Before you can question him, a hand leaves your belt loop and grasps your jaw; his thumb pushes your mouth down to mirror the same motion you did to him. Instantly his lips meet yours as his tongue slithers into your mouth and ruts against yours. 

The temperature of the room is painfully hot, and despite shedding your sweatshirt earlier, you can feel the warmth on your skin. Nipples hard against your bra and back arching in pleasure despite him not even leaving first base. 

Lips against his own and panties completely ruined with each grind against his erection; your puffy clit now aching for more friction as your cunt clenches pathetically from the clothes bulge rutting against it.

You're lost in pleasure until a moment of realization washes over you. You were kissing him.

Yes, you had done this once before–but there was an audience back then, and a point to prove. Right now, there was no one else in the room that this was meant for; each rock of your heads to a matched rhythm was not convincing anyone but yourselves that whatever ‘this’ was, didn’t qualify as casual.

Hands snaking into his hair and tugging slightly, a low reverberation escapes his throat from the sensation and the grip on your waist tightens. Sighing through your nose, you tug harder to pry his head back; the force nearly ripping out his hair from the strength you need to get him off your lips. 

Saliva coats his chin as he looks up at you with hazy eyes; it would be so easy to go even further, but looking at his appearance, you know it’s for the best if it stops here. You sit back slightly but his bent knees keep you close

Has he even been in a relationship? Or done anything for that matter?

It’s wrong. Fake dating, kissing, doing this with someone who obviously has no idea what they’re getting into. Additionally, it probably looks awful on your behalf to have people entertain the idea of you and L being together; you can practically hear the ‘she slept her way to the top’ rumors now. 

“That’s uhh.. What they could walk in on…if we need up the ante..” you offer slowly, with a distant voice. 

Ryuzaki takes the pause to breathe deeply and nods once; his eyes bore into your face with concern and awkwardness. It doesn’t take much effort for him to read the way your face is torn in a mixture of disappointed emotions. 

A million sentences of affirmation for his decision to commit to ‘this’ cross his mind; instead he settles on, “I see.”

You swallow dryly and swing around to tap his knees which he immediately unbends to allow you to swing off his lap and hop off the bed. Ryuzaki remains laying down, his eyes never leaving your figure as you bend down to lace up your sneakers. 

This feels ridiculous. The act of tying your shoes is akin to getting dressed after a one night stand while the guy tries to decide if he should order you an Uber or not. 

“Watari is probably going to be concerned.” You say in a weak attempt to lighten the mood.

L sits up slightly and glances at his crotch with a grimace; you take the hint to turn around while he adjusts himself. 

“Don’t feel bad about it– I’m sure if any one was on your lap like that… it would happen.”

It’s an attempt to make him feel better, but the words leave a bitter taste in your mouth, as if picturing him with another person wasn’t fair. 

“I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable… I didn’t mean to push you earlier for an explanation of your uh… plan.” He apologizes from behind you.

You spin back around and notice his long shirt now covering the erection he’s tucked into the elastic band of his boxers and shrug. “No, it was wrong of me to make such an intense move on you without warning.”

Ryuzaki blinks and shakes his head. “That’s alright. We need ‘this’ to be realistic considering our lives are on the line if Misa really is the Second Kira.”

Pursing your lips, you exhale slowly and nod; your gaze locked on the carpet of the room. 

L stands beside you and opens and closes his hands in an awkward fidget. He’s never been one for honesty, communication, or vulnerability and the tension of the moment makes him falter. “I don’t regret doing this, y/n. But if you have second thoughts or regrets… I won’t hold them against you.”

You continue staring at the corner of the room for a moment before gathering the courage to look back over at the man and drink in his disheveled appearance. Despite your brain telling you to end this stupid charade now, your heart keeps your feet firmly planted next to him. 

“I don’t regret this, Ryuzaki. I don’t regret you.”

He opens his eyes wider, and searches your face for any sign that you were simply saying that to protect his ego. Not finding any, he smiles gently and nods. “That’s good to hear.”

You both stand in silence, neither one of you bringing up the fact that what just happened defied all aspects of what a fake relationship really is; the fear that calling it out would end the entire agreement prevents you from opening your mouth. 

“I guess we’ll just have to do that if Light manages to cast some doubt on us.” Ryuzaki offers while sliding his hands into the front pocket of his jeans. 

You chuckle, enjoying the break in the atmosphere and nudge his shoulder slightly. “Riiight. Maybe it’ll come in handy sometime.”

Ryuzaki’s stance is lighter, enjoying your eased expression, and heads for the bedroom door. “Yes, indeed. Maybe we should… continue practicing sometime? It would be best to not be caught unprepared after all.”

You step out of the room and pause while looking at the man. It’s an unspoken offer; an invitation to keep doing this without actually addressing the underlying implication of everything. You’re convinced he’s never been in a relationship before, but he seems to be an expert at creating a situationship; settling for the ease of not having to do the ‘what are we actually’ conversation, you nod. “That sounds nice.”

Watari fluffs a few pillows and places the TV remote neatly next to a decorative candle on the coffee table before looking up at the both of you. Approaching the living room, you move to sling your bag over your shoulder while the older man looks between you both.

“Ah, you’ve finished. Was I able to be of assistance?”

Your face flushes and you run a hand casually through your hair. “Well that depends… what did you hear?”

Watari places the last fluffed pillow into the loveseat L usually sits at and stands upright. “Some minor commotion from the walls, but nothing else.” He turns to Ryuzaki. “Will we need new furniture? Or to switch suites?”

Mortification creeps back in but L simply shakes his head and peers out the window to the storm still raging outside. “That won’t be necessary. Thank you.”

Shuffling to the door you turn back to L who follows you to the entrance. “So we’re keeping the ‘notebooks’ a secret still too?”

“Yes, until we can get Misa in custody and question her direction. We’ll need her schedule from her manager first though.”

You nod, watching the way Watari retrieves the Mercedes keys and pivots into the hallway to give you and Ryuzaki another moment of space. 

“So… guess I’ll see you later? Not on campus, but here I suppose?”

“Yes, for the time being I can’t risk leaving the headquarters.”

You nod and tighten the straps of your bag, not wanting to leave but also knowing it’s late enough already. “Right, that’s a good idea…”

“Are you alright?” 

Defensively backing up, you blush at being called out so blatantly. “Yea. Sorry, I’ll head out now.”

“That’s not what I said.” He interrupts, shutting the front door when you try to open it. “Tell me what’s wrong. Please.”

You startle backward slightly and peer at him. “Nothing’s wrong. I’ve just got a lot on my mind…”

Ryuzaki releases his pressure keeping the door shut but doesn’t stop staring at your face as you shuffle into the hallway; Watari stands at the elevator at the end, keeping the door open.

He’s unconvinced but lets you take a few steps into the hallway. It’s a dumb move on your part given the complicated nature of this relationship, but you can’t fight the urge to spin around and plant a small kiss on the apple of his cheek.

His face breaks into a bright blush and he brings a few fingers to touch the spot in awe. Despite being significantly tamer than the makeouts you’ve already had, it’s the first kiss you’ve shared outside of fake pretense.

You give a slight wave to Ryuzaki and spin back around to power walk to the elevator to the awaiting older man, eager to go home, shower, and contemplate the meaning of your life. By the time the doors shut, you exhale all the air in your lungs and ignore the gentle laugh Watari releases as he bemusingly watches your expression.

~~~~~

L POV

A grin spreads across his lips as he watches the way you toss your bag over your head to shield yourself from the rain as you run into the passenger seat of the car. He knows Watari probably offered you an umbrella, and that you probably refused it on the assumption the rain wasn’t that bad.

Emotions that have rarely, if ever, stir inside Ryuzaki’s chest as he watches the car purr to life and slowly pull out of the hotel parking lot and disappear down the road. What was he doing again? Ah, right– catching Kira. 

It’s the main priority at the forefront of his mind, but his heart pulls him in another direction. Watari gives him knowing glances everytime your name is mentioned and the way Light has seemingly caught on to the ‘charade’ places him in an uncomfortable situation.

Sighing in exhaustion, he walks back over to the edge of the bed and sits down idly before flopping his back onto the plush mattress. The world famous detective L would break off this silly relationship and move freely– not caring if a member of his group had unfortunately been put at risk. He wasn’t heartless, he didn’t want members of the team to die, but he didn’t have a reason to go out of his way to protect you. L would never act so irrationally. 

But as to the book as L was, Lawliet was still a man. A man with follies, ambitions, hopes, and dreams, and love. He was persuaded by his heart as much as his brain, despite his best attempts to seal off the temptations of emotions as best as he could. The sound of your voice is similar to that of a siren calling a sailor; he knows that this is bad.

Thunder roars again outside, and Ryuzaki sits upright with a tight feeling in his chest. If things were different, if maybe you were work colleagues at a normal job, or if Kira was caught already, he could figure out how to put it into words– how the way he wanted you was real. But he can’t; at least not now. 

The image of you is painting in his mind so vividly, he wants to shut his eyes forever if it meant he could see it for eternity. The movement of your hips, the flick of your tongue, the way you kissed him for the second– no third time now had to mean something. 

Ryuzaki blinks and turns his attention to the window pane once more, taking in the glow of lightning that flashes outside inbetween crashes of thunder. It’s the first time in his life he wants to be completely honest, so he can kiss you and touch you in a way that shows it’s real.

Pursing his lips, he knows the situation is bad, even worse considering his self restraint is wearing thinner and thinner each time your mouth latches onto his. He’s ok with it though, convincing himself that he’s ok with a fake relationship if it means he gets to keep you to himself and call you his even if you weren’t.

Ryuzaki would never act like this, but L sighs and notices the small bundle of your sweatshirt fabric thrown on the floor from earlier. Taking it in his hands, he can smell the scent of your usual perfume and he clenches his jaw in self disgust. 

Tomorrow, Ryuzaki would file the needed documents for constructing a cell with enough precautions to hold Misa in confinement upon her arrest next week; tonight, L does a mental estimate of the time it takes Watari to drop you off and come back before unzipping the fly of his jeans.

a/n time: also the artwork at the top is mine (i usually post fanart on a separate account but i drew that for this series hehe)

YIPPEE just in time for valentine's day hehe

this is my longest chapter to date omg what is a process to make. I was really unsure if wanted to go forward with the 'lets make fake sex sounds' kinda trope, but decided it would be good considering how I want the next chapter to go -> aka Miss Misa gets to finally appear hehe

also sorry but yall in a situationship now and both men are rude af and master manipulators

anywayssss i love seeing ur comments on these, it literally makes my day (and lmk if you want to join the tag list)

comments/likes/reblogs all appreciated <333

-oatmeal

tags: @lechatparle24 @irissfoot @iheteeaifs @automaticpatroltragedy @greenapplesaucepi @thesimpnovao @leiiilaaaa

[mullermilkshake]

An experiment.

L is looking for ties and leads to Kira.

L (Death Note) x Fem!reader DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT,Non-con,L is a virgin,Vaginal fingering,Cunnilingus,unprotected sex,Referenced stalking,Kidnapping,Vaginal sex,Cream pie

<<< For more content, click this link to go back to the Masterlist! >>>

“I don’t know who Light Yagami is!” It had been a lifetime in that room deprived of your sight. 

“You do know him, I listened to that phone call you made. It isn’t wise to lie to me.” You didn’t know who spoke, the voice you couldn’t recognise but all you knew was that he had introduced himself as L.

Exhaustion didn’t quite cover it, being bound and exposed while he touched you in all the ways a stranger shouldn’t. You were a science experiment to him, testing ways to make you squeal and what made you squirm, though he never talked to anyone else except for himself. 

It sounded like he was making mental notes whenever he made you orgasm in that freezing echoey room, legs in stirrups it felt like. And somehow, he managed it every single time, mumbling to himself every orgasm he accomplished that made you wet and writhing despite your protests.

“I don’t. I-I really don’t. I just want to go home, please just let me go.”

“Now why would I do that?” It was so sinister, only his breath past the blindfold in the deafening silence.

“Because…” You thought carefully. “Because I believe you can be a good person and this is all just a mistake.”

That was a lie you told yourself. It didn’t seem at all that you could ever leave, remaining here forever with a sicko who had never revealed himself to you. You didn’t recognise anything about him, voice smooth and calm, completely pleasurable to your ears and tender touch against your exposed and bare skin lingering a little longer than what was acceptable. 

All of that in an uncomplicated time were characteristics some looked for in a partner. But not you, you despised him, loathed his actual existence to the point you often thought about how you would inflict pain on him. 

Strangling was the most common thought to drag against your numb deprived brain. As soon as he unshackled you, unrestrained you, both of your hands would wrap themselves tightly around his neck and squeeze and squeeze until he stopped moving so you could escape. He didn’t sound extraordinarily big, though knowing your luck, he was probably six foot tall and built like an Ox.

“You really believe I’m a good person?”

No. “Yes.”

“You don’t believe that.” He pressed two fingers to your neck and chuckled quietly though it still echoed in the lonesome room.

“Your heart rate has elevated and your breathing says otherwise, like I said before, it isn’t wise to lie to me if you want to leave. Though with all your reservations, I am in fact a good person. I wouldn't work for the police if I wasn’t.”

The police? What? A man as malicious as himself worked for the people who were supposed to keep you safe and to protect you. Not to use you like a toy for some fucked up twisted intrusive thoughts for a power play.

“I’m incredibly trusted, did you know that? There are three men in the next room, all of whom trust my decision… The cameras are off right now. But when they come back on, anything you say, would be what Kira would say. And they would take it at face value.”

Why was he not listening to you, was he that twisted? “I’m not Kira!”

“I know. Though I am curious as to what you are. You still have yet to give me that answer and no matter how much I try, I can’t seem to get the right perspective.”

“W-what are you talking about?”

“Your body. I’m struggling to define its boundaries because you react differently every time.” His fingers brushed against the skin of your thigh, tingling away at the slightest touch and exposure to the chill in the air. 

“Don’t touch me. Please let me go.”

There was a rustle of fabric, shuffle of paper and scribbling. “I don’t think you’re in any position to make demands now, are you?”

His tone was calmer than ever, contact remained as you registered that it was his fingertips, moving slowly up your leg to your sensitive area, private from prying eyes. You weren’t sure if you were even covered up half the time.

You’d asked yourself so many times over why was he doing this to you, why did he pick you to bring in and question. But that wasn’t what left your lips. “How could you do this to someone?”

You heard something audible behind the blindfold and a long pause. Then he said, “It’s odd of you to ask that. About ninety percent of people in your position would have asked why I’m doing this, not how. I’ll indulge you, but only this once. I do this just because I can, wouldn't you if you had the power of the NPA and Task Force behind you?”

“No… I wouldn’t do anything so cruel.” All you could do was tear up, wetting the blindfold so that it stuck to your face.

“I wouldn’t say it was cruel, just an experiment. You see, I get extremely bored and you have piqued my interest. I want to see what exactly makes you tick, what excites you and pushes you over the edge that renders you immobile.�� There was a heavy and suffocating pause. “I don’t actually give a damn about Kira, not since I found you. But I need to keep up appearances of course.”

“Found me?” That implied he was looking for you and this whole thing was not by accident. 

“You’re quite vocal when you want to be, all on your own in your bedroom. I want to hear that again, only I want to do it myself. I’m fascinated by your body and I want to understand what strings to pull.”

…Bedroom? There was no way he had seen your bedroom. 

Why is he saying these things? As if all he’d done already wasn’t enough. You wanted to be sick, make a scene and spit on him for what he was pulling, lying about everything that left his lips. The police could stop him if they knew, there must be some sort of way to get a message out you hoped, but how you weren't sure since the cameras were off.

“I know what you’re thinking. How on earth has he seen my bedroom? Well it's simple to deduce when you enter your apartment complex, then you cross reference how long it would take to get to the highest floor by either the elevator or walking, seeming as your complex is only a few floors and judging by your physical fitness, the probability of you using the stairs was high.”

That pause again, nothing good came of it. “I only had to wait for you to come home in the dark and wait for a light to turn on. You should really invest in a blackout blind, anyone could sit on that tree just outside your window and look in.”

You remembered. One night not long before you ended up in this place, you thought you had seen something outside your window past your net curtains. Though, when you looked out there was nothing there so you dismissed it as a bird or wild animal. It had been summer and it got you all hot and bothered. 

“Seeing you touch yourself in that way got me thinking if I could replicate it, but since now, nothing has gotten you there.” 

His fingers moved and pressed against you, the restraints stopped you from moving, there was no room to flinch or pull away. They were inside you quickly, but he was gentle and kept that way when his tongue moved there too, licking up the entire length of you, moving slowly and purposefully over your clit so it made you jolt involuntarily. 

Here he went again, he’d keep going until you came. Guaranteed every time. 

He stopped and that threw you off. He sighed to himself, “No. That’s not right, you didn’t squirm like before when I did this.”

L pulled his fingers out of you and moved them over your clit in small circles, you tried so hard to stop yourself moaning in pitch black, but it was too late. “I recall your fingers doing this, please don’t stifle your moans or it'll disrupt the whole experiment. I’m using that time in your bedroom as a control, it’s not an ideal parameter to go off of, but unfortunately it’s all I have.”

You didn’t make one sound and bit your lip to defy him, to ruin it in hopes he’d grow bored and let you go. “To put it simply, I need you to let go and stop being uptight if you want this over with.”

Still nothing. “Ah I know. Let’s have a little fun, why dont we play a game?” 

“A game?” He’d baited you. 

“This is a fun game…” He moved in another direction, and used his other hand to finger you like before. “And it's called, let’s see how much I can get away with.”

“W-what?” 

“I think it's time we had intercourse, I have nothing to go by in comparison but don’t worry, it’s entirely for my own notes, no one else will see us.” He’d never fucked you before.

It all overwhelmed you, panicking and straining against the straps you didn’t register the numbness or singing pain tugging your wrists. “No! Stop this right now, or I swear I’ll scream so loud everyone will come running and stop you!”

“Go right ahead,” A rustle of fabric. “It’s all soundproof, no one will hear you. But if you do insist on screaming, try to differentiate it between pleasure and panic, there's a fine line and it can be difficult to tell the difference.”

And then his cock was there, hard and pushing into you, your dripping cunt with so much ease you didn’t realise how wet he’d made you. Straight in and he held himself there, the entire length of his cock to bottom out. 

“You’ll have to excuse me, this is my first time but upon watching pornography, it's not entirely difficult to work out. I’ll have plenty of practice.”

“Plenty? You said it would be over after, you said!”

“Did I? I don’t recall.” He thrusted in and out slowly to adjust, his hands finding their way to your breasts, massaging them and squeezing. “Hm… you react differently to nipple stimulation than taking my fingers, interesting. ”

He rolled your nipples between his fingers over the fabric, pulling and pinching to get a reaction out of you. It was involuntary, the noises escaping your lips was ghastly as he fucked you, gradually picking up the pace. 

“I wonder what it’ll feel like if I ejaculate inside you-”

“Don’t do that. You better not fucking do that, you’re deranged!” 

“You say that, but biologically speaking, your body is telling me a different story. So wet and lubricated, it’s telling me that you’re enjoying yourself despite protesting. Can you explain that?” His voice became strained. 

You tried screaming, asking anyone behind the blacked out lens of the security camera he’d mentioned to help, to stop L and to let you loose. If there was really even one there.

No one answered of course, just like he said and after a while, he covered your mouth with his hand. 

“Despite this being an experiment, I can’t actually concentrate whilst you're screaming in my ear like that. From what I’ve read, I’m very close to finishing and I’d like to enjoy it. It is my first time after all and it feels much better than I expected. We can resume the experiment at a later date.” 

He was really putting effort in now, his hips pounding into your aching and numbing legs, fingers digging into you as he gripped and breathed in a way that you assumed only meant one thing. 

He was close. “That’s it.” He said, jerking into you and jutting with his orgasm inside you. 

Deep and already you could feel his cock twitching and filling you, but he didn’t pull out, not at first. So clinical and robotic, breaths reaching normality quickly. 

“That was…” There was a hint of shock perhaps. “I enjoyed that very much.” 

Just another horny man on top of you to make you regret and despise yourself. “Get the fuck off of me you creep! How could you do that?” 

“It just solidified my initial assessment… Now I understand just how much I can get away with… interesting.” 

DISCLAIMER - Crossposted from my AO3 - I do not own any of the characters or anything from the anime. This is a work of fan fiction and is absolutely not representative of the views or intentions of the original creator(s).

Also please don’t post any of my work without permission thank you!

[akixxsstuff]

Sex with L would be like...

Death Note L Lawliet x gender neutral reader

NSFW content // Fluff // One shot

(The picture above was edited by me).

Summary: Why listen to you discuss strategies to catch Kira when L could listen to you moaning instead? Why devour dessert when you taste so much sweeter? You weren't Kira, but L would allow you to get away with murder since you were the most pleasurable and addicting element in the investigation.

You always knew when L would kiss you since his thumb would always brush against your lips, (just like he did to his own while focusing) before leaning in. L's lips were always warm and sweet and often covered in crumbs or smeared with frosting, it was just like tasting a sweet slice of cake.

Regarding candy, food-play was one of L's kinks, he even once bought you a candy g-string. His slender fingers stretched your quivering and dripping hole while he nibbled on the lollies, refusing you of his cock until he tasted every one.

His mouth would be filled with a mixture of whipped cream and cum and he would enjoy muffling your moans with strawberries. L would then whisper in between kisses, "You're the prettiest plate".

Another kink of L's was voyeurism, it's why he didn't remove the cameras from your bathroom and bedroom even after concluding that you weren't Kira. He would ogle live footage of you massaging your soaking and soapy ass in the shower, or you drenching your bed sheet with cum while you pleasured yourself with a vibrator. All the while his hand would be in his boxers teasing the flushed tip of his aching erection.

His formal language remained during sex, saying phrases like: "I thoroughly enjoy your responses Y/N" or "Interesting, I didn't expect this to increase your arousal" and "My erection is clouding my judgement".

L would always try to keep his composure as well, only allowing an eye twitch, quiet grunting or a slight scrunch of the nose. Resisting the heavenly sensation of his hard and lengthy shaft being sucked in by your warm, wet mouth was painful, but it was a habit of his to mask his emotions.

L's favorite sex positions involved any that he could remain in his usual crouched position. He especially needed to squat during oral sex since according to him, doing otherwise would "reduce his abilities by roughly 40 per cent".

He would grip your quivering thighs while his tongue greedily lapped in between your legs, his mouth always sliding with ease because of how much he drooled over your moans and gorgeous body. You would pull onto his wide and dark locks while feeling waves of overwhelming pleasure consume your body over and over again until you were aching. Oral sex was L's greatest strength in regards to sex, he always was sucking and licking onto some type of sweet so of course he had a super strong tongue.

[tarantulasnot]

So erm I like to be metaphorical about shit so hear me out on fucking L as Kira (light was aborted) and like having the pen against his neck cause you're gonna kill him after anyway. He's been enjoying the game you played so much and he caught feelings from your super smart big brain so he can't help how much he groans and huffs as he cums until he's shooting blanks yknow? Cause he loves your mind and the way your cunt is sucking him in and the feeling of the very thing that will end his life against his neck HEHEHHEE WOULD WE LIKE THAT CHAT???

[fictioncupid]

Don't tell me you don't want this. (they/them ver) (NSFW)

Looking for the he/him version?

Ao3 link! - Don't tell me you don't want this.

MINORS DO NOT RB OR COMMENT! PLEASE.

Summary:

You knew L was going to notice your crush on him sooner or later. You just didn’t expect him to bring it up in a room full of your colleagues.

33,776 words of explicit L/reader insert, 25k set up, 8k porn (ish). Longest thing I've written to date so be nice lol.

Pronouns & genital terms used!:

Reader- they/them, clit, pussy, cunt, entrance

CW: Reader has a panic attack during this fic (not during the sex), and L is kind of manipulative (not intentionally mean tho).

Notes and NSFW content warnings under the cut.

NSFW content warnings: multiple orgasms, size kink, edging, d/s dynamic, cunnilingus, armpit kink? If you squint?

Notes: L is referred to as ‘Ryuzaki’ for most of this fic

set early-ish in the investigation

L calls reader ‘bambi’ for… plot reasons… not because I find it hot…. not at alllll…..

××××××××××

You’re sitting watching one of several monitors over Ryuzaki’s shoulder for the sixth day in a row when it happens. When your world gets tipped sideways and you wish the Earth would split wide and swallow you whole just so you don’t have to live through it. Well, maybe that's a slight exaggeration but it does feel like an ice bucket is being tipped over your head. You don’t know what to do when he says it. First being confused by his unusual line of questioning, then abjectly mortified by where it ends up. Considering that the Ryuzaki you’d gotten to know over these past few months didn’t care for small talk, or even big talk if it wasn’t at least tangentially related to the case, you should have known there was some other reason for him to be asking how you’ve been sleeping. 

Your eyes had glazed over long before this happened. Tired and bored it was hard to keep your focus from slipping onto more… entertaining prospects. Prospects like the one sitting right in front of you, perched on a wheelie chair with his knees pulled up to his chest. Your gaze shifts ever so slightly from the grainy picture in front of you to just left of it, pulled in by the repetitive motion of him pulling a lock of hair through his long fingers. You didn’t notice when you started watching Ryuzaki tuck and then untuck his hair around his ear, but it is somehow mesmerising. His other hand is presumably preoccupied clicking his thumbnail between his teeth. 

You can hear the sharp tik-tik-tik of it in the near silence of the room, the only other audio coming from the CCTV being played before you but even that is just fuzzy static. Ryuzaki claims it helps him focus. He’s already said he doesn’t think there’s any new information to be gleaned from watching this tape again, so you don’t feel too bad for watching him instead. Focus drifting to how big his hands are, how long his fingers are, the sharp, bony edges of his wrists and you wonder yet again if the man eats anything other than sweets. Where it all goes on his wiry, lean frame? How soft his belly must be. If his nipples are puffy and his tits are soft. This is a topic you come back to often. You caught a glance of him shirtless once, so you know his nipples are brown. A surprise given how pale he is but certainly not an unwelcome one. 

You’ve had a crush on Ryuzaki for a couple months now. The attraction had been immediate but the feelings only blossomed once you got to know him more. Mainly after it became apparent how lost the entire task force would be without him, thus making some of his earlier choices seem a little less severe and more unfortunately necessary. 

If you were any less shy maybe you would have done something about them- the feelings, but Ryuzaki really doesn’t seem interested in anything other than catching Kira and maybe occasionally teasing you but you’re not sure that’s anything more than an intellectual pastime of indulging his mild latent sadism. You’re not even sure if he knows about your interest in him or if he just enjoys watching you skitter. And you’re not interested in making more of a fool of yourself than you regularly do. So, instead you’ve chosen to stifle and sit on your feelings in hopes they’ll go away.

However, your attempts to crush them out of existence don’t seem to be working as of late, considering they keep cropping up at the most inopportune times. Like now for example, when you’re supposed to be working and instead you’re thinking about how his nipples would taste. Sweet, like all the sugar he eats? Or maybe salty, with how little inclination for self care the man exhibits he’s got to be at least a little sweaty most of the time.

You stifle an airy giggle to yourself. Your hand comes up to cover your mouth in surprise at the noise when Ryuzaki turns his wide eyed, inquisitive stare on you. He’s only turned his neck, and not the rest of his body. Like some kind of fucked up owl. You were right, and his thumb is indeed in his mouth. You jump, startled out of your daydream by him. It takes a couple tries wetting your dry mouth with your tongue before you can stop thinking about anything other than the shape and shade and weight of his cock in your mouth. 

‘Are you alright, Bambi?’ 

‘Huh? What? Oh… Ye-yes I’m-I’m fine.’ You laugh awkwardly, hoping to dispel the tension you know he can’t feel. You twirl your hair between your fingers for something to do with your hands. You must be redder than a tomato with how on fire your face feels. But, better the blood rushing there than… other places, you suppose, as you squirm awkwardly in your seat. You feel like a bug under a microscope under his wide-eyed, investigative gaze.

Ryuzaki’s mouth turns down slightly. He pauses the tapes that you’re not watching without even looking at it, and then a leg comes down to spin his chair to face you before returning to its usual position. He scratches the toes on his left foot with his right and you swallow nervously as you look on. You’re fucked. Oh you’re so fucked. Somehow, someway, something has connected in that freaky huge detective brain of his and you now have his full undivided attention right where you don’t want it. Focused on your face and your body language right after you’ve been spacing out thinking about how delicious it would be to be fucked by him. Shit. 

You’re familiar enough with Ryuzaki’s idiosyncrasies by now to know he does things like the feet on feet scratching when he’s hyper focused. He says it’s because he doesn’t want to break his posture, and risk missing a crucial break in the case because ‘his deductive reasoning is lowered by forty-percent’ when he sits normally. Whatever the fuck that means. 

Ryuzaki frowns deeper and scoots his chair towards you, leaning in far enough that you start to hold your breath in hopes he won’t notice the spike in your breathing at the closeness. He’s tilting his head to the side and staring blankly past you when you start to question whether Ryuzaki can secretly read minds, or if somehow he has some kind of superhuman hearing where your steadily faster thumping heart is audible to him. Either way, you’re getting steadily more convinced that the jig is already up, but you’re not going down without a fight. Embarrassment will not kill you this day. Maybe tomorrow, but not today. You steel your resolve and put on your best poker face.

The other members of the task force are sitting on the couches behind you. You can feel their gaze on the situation without even turning to look. Part of you is desperately hoping that they’re far too busy with work to focus on the two of you, but you know in your heart that the reality is the room is tiny, and they can hear all of this in high definition even if they don’t look. 

You all split into different teams earlier this week when Matsuda and Aizawa claimed they couldn’t watch any more of the same CCTV without clawing their eyes out. You understand their sentiment, it’s hard to feel useful when you can’t figure out what other data you could extrapolate from the tapes. You feel a little useless everytime Ryuzaki catches some small detail overlooked on the last run, whether inconsequential to the investigation or not. But Ryuzaki requested you personally aid him, so here you are. Your coworkers have been pouring over weeks of data trying to trace Kira in any possible way instead. From the tense atmosphere behind you this week, you’ve begun to think the endless data scrolling is somehow worse than the hours upon hours of CCTV.

The team needs a new lead quite desperately, yet nothing seems to pan out so morale is low among all the officers here. Ryuzaki himself doesn’t seem at all affected. So when he deemed it necessary to have two eyes on the screens instead of one ‘incase he missed something’, you didn’t question it, hoping to feel helpful for once, but over time it’s become quite apparent you’re just here as insurance. A physical fail-safe allowing ‘L’ to explain his case to the others without seeming totally crazy when he inevitably figures it out from some seemingly insignificant detail. He said he picked you, out of all the others, due to your ‘tenacity’ and ‘keen sense of observation’. But you’re of the opinion that he’s simply rewarding you for not telling him your real, legal name alongside everyone else the first time you met. Some reward. Watching the same CCTV footage on repeat ‘in case you missed something’, instead of reading sheet after sheet of mindless data, logging peoples movement, looking for the slightest hint of suspicion. You knew it would be hard work when you signed on to this case, you just didn’t know it would be so boring. You wonder for the first time since you all started this if Ryuzaki, if L is stuck too, or if he even knows what he’s looking for. 

Then you wonder if he would have still rewarded you if he knew the real reason you didn’t tell him your name when you first met. If you explained to him how within thirty seconds of laying eyes on him all you could focus on was his tall stature and the lazy confidence within which he held himself, one hand tucked nonchalantly in his jean’s pocket while meeting the Superintendent of the NPA. What he would think if you told him that his dark circles and ‘can’t be bothered’ heavy lidded stare had frozen you in place as a mixture of fear and arousal had trickled down your spine. That if he’d asked for your name then and there your tongue would simply have felt too big to move in your mouth. That the most you would have gotten out was a rasping ‘hah’ as you tried desperately to unstick it. Maybe he does know, even if he didn’t then. It was, after all, how you’d gotten your nickname, ‘Bambi’. 

All the other officer’s were given normal aliases such as ‘Captain Shijuro Asahi’ instead of ‘Detective Superintendent Yagami’ and yet when it came to you, ‘Bambi’  is what he called you. Of course, your fake badge says something different but that’s what he called you. Calls you. The first time you heard it, it  startled you out of your hazy cloud of anxious anticipation and flinched you into movement when he had booped you with the lollipop that had been in his mouth. His mouth. On your nose. With a sweet, monotoned drawl of, ‘coming, Bambi?’, after you hadn’t moved with everyone else. It still jellies your legs now to think about it.

You didn’t even mind that it was sticky and wet, leaving a smudge on your nose. Not hearing the chief's complaints about professionalism, you had followed along robotically after the others as they settled into the room and Ryuzaki explained that it was, ‘because you looked like a deer in headlights.’ as his own defence. You noted that he’d (wisely) chosen to omit defending the nose-boop. You’d spun to face him, startled at his reasoning and Ryuzaki had had this entirely innocent smile on his face. Like a puppy that was about to be treated to his favourite snack and was just waiting in anticipation. You could practically see his tail wagging proudly behind him. Your face had flushed redder than hell and you rushed to your seat hoping that no-one else had noticed the influence he had on you within your first five minutes of meeting. 

That’s where you are now, months later. Still feeling the same tummy-churning sense of shame over your body's gut reaction to him and how casually he’s leaning into your space. Staring intently at your face like if he looked long enough he could unravel your very essence. You feel yourself going red. Maybe he can. Ryuzaki sits back, hands going to clutch at his feet as he mutters, ‘...as I thought.’, before rubbing his thumb over the wet line of his upper lip. 

You instinctively say, ‘what?’, and immediately wince, wishing you hadn’t given him the opening. Not that it’s going to make a difference. Ryuzaki is going to say what he’s going to say whether you want to hear it or not, but still… It’s like you’re playing devil's advocate for him.

‘How has your sleep been recently?’ You blink. It’s not the question you expected him to ask but Ryuzaki’s staring at you in earnest, his wide eyes trained on your face to look for signs of honesty or discomfort. 

He told you once that he didn’t really understand emotions all that much, or why people were driven to do certain things rather than just ask or talk about it diplomatically. It’s why he liked Kira. Not that he’d ever tell anyone else that, and with the caveat that it was only as much as anyone could like a mass-murdering freak. He understands him.

Ryuzaki explained that Kira had motivations that were easily discernible to someone as logic driven as himself. He’d said he knew for certain that if- no, when he found the evidence to put Kira to justice, that Kira himself would answer any and all the questions Ryuzaki had for him. That he wouldn’t be able to help himself. Ryuzaki even suggested the possibility of Kira confessing to his crimes of his own volition before there’s evidence if the two of them ever meet in person, simply due to his ego. 

Part of you worries that this is his contingency if you don’t come across real, physical evidence of his crimes. And it’s seeming increasingly more possible as each day without a new lead comes to pass. The Ryuzaki you know would invite Kira into his own home under false pretences to see if he slips up without blinking. The other part of you knows there’s no point in worrying about it because there is no stopping Ryuzaki once he’s decided something. You can only hope he’s as smart as he seems to be and that he catches Kira before Kira kills him.

You’d laughed at the time, spoon halfway from your ice cream to your mouth, you’d flicked it accidentally into Ryuzaki’s face. Of course he simply swiped the dessert off his cheek into his mouth without blinking, sucking his fingers in a way that made your mouth drop open and your eyes dilate and your cunt flutter. You must have stared at his fingers for a good minute before you could get yourself under control. Having to shake your head to clear your thoughts and you keep an intense eye contact with your own dessert for the rest of the conversation, head down and ears burning, hoping against God that your hair would protect at least a semblance of your face as Ryuzaki continued to explain.

Nothing could stop you from continuously glancing over though as Ryuzaki told you that he’d learnt most people were unwilling to answer his questions honestly, and that he’d been forced to learn the physical signs of most emotions in order to aid him in both his detective work and personal life. You’d wondered how much real world application he’s managed to get from that, considering his almost alien nature to the task force. Whether Aizawa and Ukita would be less irate with him in your downtime if they knew how much work he was putting in to simply talk to them. You couldn’t help but think it was a little bit sad while playing with your spoon. That he has to do so much emotional labour just to even the playing field, and that you would answer his questions honestly, if ever he asked. You even told him as much.

But… maybe not now, you think to yourself as the memory floods back to you. Not when you’re trying so desperately to keep something hidden from him. Something you’d really rather remain private and then die in obscurity. Not when the stakes are so high. Sure, maybe it’d started off as a simple uncontrollable physical attraction. One you thought would go away after spending countless hours in his company, but the longer you've been spending with him, the worse it’s been getting. At this point your crush has grown way beyond the bounds of physical desire. Making your unshaking need to keep this hidden all the greater. You just knew it would be humiliating for you if he ever found out about it. 

Mainly because you’re certain he won’t return your affections. You’re pretty sure you’re not his type: he treats you much the same as your coworkers and while that could be due to professionalism, considering that he forgoes most other aspects of it including socks, you really rather doubt it. Plus, Ryuzaki has a very one-track mind, so you’re unsure if he even thinks about you in a capacity that’s not attached to the Kira case. If you exist to him outside of work. You doubt he has many thoughts pertaining to anything other than Kira at the moment. He seems to work tirelessly, day and night. Interest and attention rarely waning and when it does it’s simply a switch in focus to a distraction that allows his mind a break to process the information he absorbed earlier and organise it. 

You worry sometimes that that’s all you are. A distraction. He does seem to seek you out more so than others when he needs a break but you’d don’t know if that’s because he doesn’t quite… click with the others or if he really likes you the most. You think he does. You’re pretty sure that you’re good friends, not just coworkers, but you don’t know. Not for certain. Therefore, he can’t know. You don’t want him to know. You’re not sure you could live with it. At least this way you can live in the ‘what if’ rather than sink in the abyss of the ‘definite no’. You’re sure if he ever found out about your crush it wouldn’t bother him, heck he probably wouldn’t ever think about it after the fact but you’re not so sure you would survive the humiliation. Wanting someone so desperately who maybe doesn’t even think about you. So, you’re choosing to melt into the carpet at the slightest provocation rather than wear your heart on your sleeve and let him know how you feel. It’s safer this way.

You have to snap yourself out of your musings to remind yourself that Ryuzaki is waiting for your response. He asked you how you were sleeping, you think to yourself. ‘I-uh, well? I think. Not any-any different from use-usual, I don’t-don’t think,’ You feel put on the spot from how intently he’s staring at you. A little panicked too. He’s never once bothered asking how you are before, preferring to dive right into whatever he’s thinking about at any given moment with the expectation that you will share if you want to. And now he’s asking about your sleep? This is… weird. You’re unsettled by it.

‘Not any more stressed out than usual? Nothing weighing on your mind? Feeling exhausted from the repetitive nature of the work?’ He inquires further, leaning in again as he does. 

You feel the heat rise to your face as it flushes further. He knows. He knows. He knows. How does he know? Your mind starts racing and you don’t know where to look, flickering between his intense stare and his arms and his bare fucking feet tucked up on the edge of his chair.  

‘I only ask because you’ve not been acting like yourself recently. Normally you’re full of keen, if not helpful, observations on people and their motivations. However, lately you seem to be staring off into space more than you are working. If you were me that would be normal but you are not me and I need you to be you right now. You notice what I don’t. I wanted your opinion on what, if anything, I might be missing but that’s impossible if you’re not fully here mentally... You’re distracted, and we need all grounds covered if we’re going to catch Kira…’ He goes back to biting his thumb nail after saying all this, worrying it between his teeth the way he does when he’s deep in thought.

You almost collapse in relief. Huh. You’d never once thought he had assigned you here because he wants your help. You’d figured it was more like he valued your unthinking obedience since you don’t really argue with him. Largely because you know he is leagues smarter than everyone else in the room, but also because you know that people normally come to agree with him after he explains himself. Also, admittedly, because you find him so incredibly sexy. In the weirdest, most disarming way possible. And having his wide eyed, intense stare on you for any length of time increases the likelihood of him figuring you out that much faster because you quickly lose the ability to form coherent sentences.

Normally when you disagree with him it’s over domestic things. Like when you decided you’d had enough of seeing his greasy mop hunched over a screen eating his six hundredth sweet and/or bowl of cereal and you’d decided someone was going to make this man take a shower. Everyone else feeling too polite or too awkward to even bring it up to him other than through vague hinting, and someone had to do something. So when the hinting didn’t work, and when you asking him flat out several times didn’t work, you grabbed him by the arm and dragged him bodily over to the bathroom. 

At first you weren’t very successful. Being too nervous to get that close to him and stuttering when you tried to ask, feeling more than awkward. But after he had waved you off for the sixth time in a single day and you had smelt him from a metre away you’d sucked it up for the sake of everyone’s noses. Not even flinching after you pulled him to his feet in a surprise attack and he’d swayed bodily over you and into your space with shock and surprise written on his features. You’d just grabbed his shirt by the collar and started briskly moving down the corridor with that momentum before he caught on to what was happening. Bursting into the bedroom you knew was down the hall and briskly stepping over the mess of clothing left on his floor, you turned on the shower and chucked him into it in one large sweeping movement. Hissing ‘Wash. For the love of God and all things holy: wash.’ 

Only then did Ryuzaki raise an arm and take a whiff of his own armpit, face pinching in distaste for a split second before dropping it and nodding shortly at you. It was then your turn to feel embarrassed as he started stripping off his wet shirt and trousers with no fear for your presence. It was bad enough when his white shirt had started to become translucent from the water and you had kept determined eye contact with him but this? This was too much. 

You squeaked, as his sopping shirt went sailing over his head and splatted on the floor beside you. You caught a glance of a brown nipple and then the thick black hair decorating his armpit and then what looked like a dark mole on the fat of his left asscheek as his soaking jeans- no underwear- caught awkwardly on his crotch and he cursed flatly under his breath and you couldn’t breathe as you hightailed it from the room. 

You were so embarrassed that you could only nod awkwardly when Matsuda started asking if you managed to make him wash, the two of you having planned this attack earlier in the day when all normal methods of making this man aware of his stench had utterly failed. At least, after being scruffed like a kitten and thrown into an already running shower with his clothes on, Ryuzaki now usually acquiesces to semi-regular bathing habits after the first push or two from you. And, Matsuda’s victory dance was admittedly rather funny.   

You take a deep breath and steady yourself. Lying doesn’t come easily to you. Not that you’re bad at it, rather, just that it leaves a bad taste in your mouth. One you can’t wash out.  ‘Oh! Well, I mean, it's just that the footage is rather monotonous. Maybe I need a break haha.’ Technically that is true.

Ryuzaki takes no longer than a second to ponder your answer before he says, ’I don’t see how you could find this more boring than when we were watching the CCTV footage from before we caught sight of Penber… In fact, I think this footage is perhaps the most interesting thing we’ve seen all week. Or, do you find that a man’s public death in service of the police force is not interesting enough for you?’ 

What? Oh fuck. You glance at one of the several monitors in front of you and true to fact staring back at you are several differing angles of Raye Penber’s dying form. How the fuck did you drift off during the most tragic part of all the tapes? Goddamn it. It’s not your fault this is the four hundredth time you’ve watched them! And it wasn’t like you got distracted while he was dying! It was before that. When you noticed the freckle just underneath Ryuzaki’s hairline on the back of his neck. Shit. That’s not a good excuse. 

You know that Ryuzaki doesn’t give a flying fuck about you insulting this man’s memory. He’s just mad you aren’t telling him the truth, so he’s punishing you for it. Publicly. The thought makes you seeth internally. Sometimes you hate this man-child. You know the other members of the task force are all watching you now. You can feel their eyes on the back of your neck.

‘Ryuzaki.’ Chief Yagami has stood up. ‘Give them a break. Clearly they’re exhausted mentally and emotionally from watching that tape on repeat. It would take it out of anyone.’ God you love your chief. Love love love! You could just kiss him! Professionally, of course.

‘No. That’s not it. I just asked them if they’re tired and they said no.’ He taps his thumb against his lip. ‘They’re hiding something.’ Oh. There’s more to it than you thought. Ryuzaki’s not just antagonising you for entertainment. Hei’s upset. You’ve upset him by lying. You can see it in the tension of his shoulders, and the way his feet aren’t moving. He won’t say as much in front of the entire task force but you’ve hurt his feelings. Fuck. You’re lying to him after you told him you wouldn’t and he knows. You’re going to get no mercy here. And he’s going to figure it out if you don’t say something quick. You have to fix this, without making it any worse. Your next lie needs to be a good one.

‘No-no, I-I’m not hiding any-anything. I’m probably just-just really tired. Yeah, I’ve not been-been sleeping very -wuh-well you see.’ Oh for God’s fucking sake maybe you are a bad liar. You pray to God he doesn’t notice. 

‘You’re lying to me. Badly at that.’ The clicking of his nail between his teeth starts up again. ‘Something is very wrong here.’ He’s gonna figure it out. You know he’s going to figure it out. You can feel it in your gut. Maybe you can make a quick exit. A fast retreat. You spin on your heel and see Chief Yagami halfway across the room, watching things unfold with a concerned look on his face. Matsuda’s standing up but hasn’t left his seat yet. Your other three coworkers are still seated, but with their heads turned your way in interest. Great. Your humiliation has an audience. At least they’re worried about you, you guess? You’d rather they weren’t fucking here right now though. You feel like a rat trapped in a corner. Ryuzaki’s thoughtful humming from behind you is the same tone as a purring cat about to devour its prey. You pray beyond hope that the ground opens up and swallows you whole. Or that the grim reaper is real and takes some serious fucking pity on your right now and puts you in an early grave. 

Ryuzaki’s muttering behind you is a mere murmur yet you can hear it ringing loud in the pin-drop silence of the room. Your feet won’t cooperate with your brain and you’re glued to the spot in horror as you hear him rattle off, ‘You’re distracted and unfocused at work, hardly paying attention… You’ve been rather short-tempered when you have been paying attention, RE: the shower incident. You keep turning red when I try to talk to you. In fact, your face is rather red right now, I can see the colour all the way down your neck. You don’t turn that colour when talking to anyone else. I’ve caught you staring at me instead of the tape several times now-I’ve got it.’

Oh no. You knew this would happen at some point but this is so much worse than you ever could have imagined. You cringe internally, preparing yourself. ‘You want to have sex with me.’ Ryuzaki says. Out loud. To the room full of your coworkers. To the room full of your coworkers who are all watching you. Including your boss, who you’re currently making excruciating eye contact with. Chief Yagami’s eyes are wide, mouth open in outrage. Like he can’t believe what he’s just heard.

‘Ryuzaki!’ He says sharply, in an admonishing tone. It doesn’t make you feel any better. You cringe and shut your eyes. You cannot deal with the scandalised look on his face right now.

You just know Ryuzaki’s staring at you, you can feel it on the back of your neck. He’ll be too proud of his discovery to consider the embarrassment it could be causing you to have your dirty laundry aired like that. And he phrased it in quite possibly the worst way. You want to die. Dear God, you want to die. Kira, if you’re watching- you start and then immediately stop, just in case he is watching. God fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck shit! You think, before mentally attempting to compose yourself to try to do some damage control. You can do this. You open your eyes.

You laugh, a little too loudly, going, ‘Whaaat? Ryuzaki, don’t be absurd. I told you I’m just tired.’ You spin around to face him, arms up all casual like. You can’t believe the sight you’re greeted with. This fucking asshole has pulled a lollipop out from somewhere, and is currently unwrapping it like he didn’t just drop a bomb on the room. 

He wrestles with the wrapper for a second before ripping it off with his teeth. Usually you’d be taken in by this rather silly display but all it serves to do currently is light a fire of embarrassed rage under your ass. Like now that he’s figured out your true feelings the important work has been done and there’s nothing better to do than eat a fucking lollipop. You’re mortified. You’re mortified and he’s eating a lolly. Fuck Kira, you might kill him.

Ryuzaki licks the lollipop once before turning his head to face you and freezing. He seems a little taken aback by the wild look on your face. You can’t imagine how you look right now. Bright red face, mouth a stretched, awkward grin, furiously fighting tears. Ryuzaki continues anyway, like explaining his reasoning will make any of this better. He’s speaking to you but not quite looking you in the face, instead choosing to gaze just off to the left of you as he says, ‘I asked before how you were sleeping and you said you were sleeping fine. You provided no alternative reason as to why your work has been lacking and your attention has been practically non-existent. You’re short tempered when you are paying attention and while the current lack of leads could  be a factor the fact that these incidents seem to be clustered around myself leads me to believe that you’re frustrated. Sexually. Because of me. You want to have sex with me and it’s affecting your work. I find this reason not only acceptable but the most likely. Yes. Your lie, and your bad one at that, combined with all the other factors I just listed tells me that you find me sexually attractive and would like to have sex with me. Or, would you prefer the pseudonym ‘making love’?’ Ryuzaki puts the lollipop back in his mouth.

‘Ryuzaki! This is not an appropriate topic for the workplace!’ Oh, the Chief sounds furious. Your face must be tomato red by now. You’re going to kill him. You’re quite literally going to kill him. Kira will just have to be jealous. You’re pretty sure you’re shaking.

‘Ryuzaki! You can’t just say that to someone!’ Matsuda chimes in, sounding outraged on your behalf. If you could turn around to look at him you’d guess he’s got his fists clenched in anger and a look of shock on his face but you’re frozen in place. Unable to look away from Ryuzaki even though he’s staring at the fucking wall. Why won’t he look at you? 

At least your coworkers are on your side, and you’re not the only one who thinks this is wrong, you think, before the much nastier thought of, ‘yeah because they pity you,’ overtakes it. You wish the ground would open up beneath you and swallow you whole. Hell would be nicer than this. 

Ryuzaki spins his chair slightly to face Matsuda, looks him right in the face. So he’ll look at him but not you? …You get the thought that maybe he’s relieved. Like this conversation isn’t going the way Ryuzaki thought it would and he’s happy to have an out. You scoff. Your face feels numb. All you can hear is the rushing of your blood past your ears. You’ve never been so embarrassed. You can see Ryuzaki talking but you can’t really hear what he’s saying. Robotically, you turn on your heel and start to walk out the room.

As your ears ring you can't’ help but pick up the end of their conversation, ‘Why not? I don’t see a problem with it, it's the truth. Their work has been lacking recently and sexual frustration seems to be the cause of it. I don’t think it’s a bad idea either. Sex is beneficial for both the mind and the body. Sexual frustration can hinder a person’s ability to reason properly and we need everyone in top form if we’re going to catch Kira. This includes Bambi.’ That fucking nickname. So you’re a benefit now? A problem to solve? Ryuzaki finishes his speech with, ‘They’ve done studies, you know.’ He’s still looking at Matsuda rather than you and you’re done. You’re done. You grab your coat, planning on leaving and never coming back.

‘Well then by that logic we should all be having sex with each other!’ Matsuda exclaims as you stalk out the room. As you brush past the Chief he opens his mouth to say something, but gets distracted at the last moment by Matsuda’s comment, instead choosing to admonish him for his poor choice of argument. 

‘Well, given the fact you all are self-proclaimed hetero-sexuals I don’t see how that would be beneficial to any of us.’ Ryuzaki says. 

You’re at the door when you hear him say, ‘It seems I’ve upset them.’ Yeah. No shit. You hear your coworkers say something to that effect. You hope beyond hell that he doesn’t feel the need to follow you out of the room and try fix things. You've been embarrassed enough for one lifetime, but then again Ryuzaki has never been the type to try fix what he doesn’t think is a problem. You’re surprised he even noticed you were upset even though you were near tears in front of him. Well, maybe that’s a bit harsh. He definitely knew you were upset. That’s why he couldn’t look you in the face you bet, because he was uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable enough to stop talking unfortunately.

Your house is located within a fifteen minute ride to the current hotel functioning as headquarters, but it is still an excruciating fifteen minutes of trying not to sniffle into your jacket on a subway train full of strangers. It’s actually the first time you’ve taken the subway since Ryuzaki started playing the CCTV tapes of all the FBI agents on repeat after observing that both the Yagami and Kitamura household weren’t suspicious. So recently you’ve been prefering to take a taxi or walk. 

You’d only been a police officer for about a year before Kira had appeared, you weren’t even assigned to the Kira case before people started resigning. But your strong sense of justice and inability to walk away from those in trouble had meant you’d not taken ‘no’ for an answer when you overheard Superintendent Yagami and the others talking outside the NPA building late at night. They were discussing whether or not to trust L. Well, it was more like you hadn’t taken no for an answer after you’d followed them back into the building and ambushed them in their meeting with L himself. Or, Watari himself and L through the computer. 

After being chastised by Superintendent Yagami for eavesdropping, and then watching in shock and hilarity as L in turn chastised him for not being discreet enough. He’d asked if anyone else might have overheard the conversation, and you’d replied that you were one of very few left in the building this late. That you’d gone out for some air just before the group had arrived and you were certain you were the only one around, and that maybe you’d only overheard them because you’d been deliberately eavesdropping after hearing the name L. They told you no. 

You’d then taken the opportunity to make the argument that Matsuda hadn’t been a police officer for very long either. And that Kira was a bully. And you couldn’t stand bullies. So if they wouldn’t let you help with the official investigation, then you would run an un-official investigation. And track Kira down in your own time, or die trying. 

The room was dead silent after your proclamation until you heard a tinny, bitten off laugh coming from the computer Watari was holding. Apparently, L found you amusing. L had then stated, ‘they sound as determined as any of you. Experience, while vitally important in all cases, is only secondary in this one to a willingness to put your very life on the line to catch Kira. We are dealing with a criminal who can likely kill without being in contact with their victim, and we have no idea as to how they do it. We need all the help we can get.’ That had settled it. And from that night on you were a member of team ‘let’s kill Kira!’ Not that any of them knew you called it that. 

When you finally make it home you run upstairs, collapse on your bed and muffle a pent-up scream into your pillow. God that was so humiliating. Not to mention unprofessional. There’s no way in hell they let you back in after a display like that. You know Ryuzaki was going to figure out you have a crush on him sooner rather than later, but you never expected him to announce it to the whole room- hell, you never expected him to even acknowledge it! You’d thought before that maybe he already knew and was ignoring it but this is classic Ryuzaki. Forever surprising you with astute observations and a complete lack of social awareness. You know he can’t help it, so you never get mad at him for it. That is, until, you know, he humiliated you in a room full of people you respect and work with. 

You huff out another scream and kick your feet into the bedding below you, before grumpily rolling over and curling into a ball. You’ve never been so embarrassed. You grab your feet with your hands and rock slightly before turning your face into the pillow again. Gods you wish it would suffocate you. You wriggle and grab at your duvet until you can pull it over your head. It dims bright light above you and makes you feel a little better enclosed in it. You feel tears prick at your eyes again so you hunker down and cry until you pass out from exhaustion.

You don’t return to work for five days. You know it’s unprofessional, and that maybe you’ll get fired but you’re too embarrassed. Choosing instead to sulk under your blankets, eat ice cream, and watch mindless daytime television in hopes that if you don’t think about it the whole entire thing will go away. Anger bubbles through you as the memory resurfaces and you scream, frustration ripping through your jaw and into the covers you have balled up around your mouth. 

Your phone rings, and you know it’s work because of the ringtone. You can’t bring yourself to answer. It rings twice more before falling silent. You spare a glance to where it’s lying on the ground three feet away, surrounded by the work clothes you’d shucked off and not bothered to put in the wash or even the basket. There’s a moment of silence. You breathe out in relief. It rings again but this time with the jingle set for unknown numbers. 

You heave out a sigh and prepare to leave your bed for the first time in the week since you started hiding from the world. You stumble over to pick up the phone and say, ‘what?’ in the most irritated tone you can muster. It’s Matsuda. He shouts in excitement when he hears you and you have to pull the phone away from your ear in order to save your hearing. Matsuda rambles on excitedly for a moment before his tone turns soft but kind of urgently awkward. He says something along the lines of,

‘we- I mean, the boss- I mean, L, No! I-we, URGH.’ He sighs loudly down the phone and then tries again, ‘You need to come back to work. I know you’re embarrassed about… what happened but I promise you that no one will bring it up! And Ryuzaki has an insane plan that you need to hear! We don’t even know if it’ll work or how he figures we’re gonna- listen. Just come back to work. Please. You’re the only one he listens to- No Ryuzaki! I’m not on the phone!-’ Matsuda’s voice suddenly gets ten times quieter and you know he’s holding the receiver behind his back to hide the fact his phone is on and in use rather than off and in a box on the table. You sigh through your nose and tip your head back, silently mouthing, ‘what the fuck,’ to the ceiling before pinching the bridge of your nose and bringing the phone back to your ear.

‘Listen,’ You say loudly, hopefully loud enough Matsuda can hear you over his and Ryuzaki’s squabbling. Not that Ryuzaki squabbles. What he does is more of a monotoned bulldozing of the conversation with all the reasons that you are wrong until he’s finished or you can accurately counter him. Usually you’d have more decorum, and not just drop your coworker in it for breaking the rules but frankly you’re over it. And really you don’t mind if this pisses Ryuzaki off. Serves him right, you rudely think. ‘I know I need to come back, but we’re hitting dead end after dead end and I just- I need some time-’ you start to say. You're cut off by a scuffling noise and you hear Matsuda shout ‘Hey!’ in the background. 

‘Bambi.’ Oh no. Oh no no no. Oh fuck no. He is not on the phone to you right now. ‘Our coworkers have informed me that I acted inappropriately and embarrassed you the other day. That was not my intention. I regret hurting you, and I now know that I shouldn’t have brought it up during work hours.’ You shouldn’t have brought it up at all you asshat! ‘I’m very sorry for whatever hurt I may have caused you.’  But. There’s a ‘but’ coming you can just feel it. ‘However,’ Asshole. ‘I think I may have found our next move- no, I am certain of it. Some members of this task force have pointed out its risky nature but I truly believe this will bring us that much closer to catching Kira. Or at the least help rule out who is, and is not a suspect.’ 

You almost hang up. Almost. You don’t. Instead you say, ‘How in sweet hell does this relate to me, Ryuzaki?’

‘You’re a part of the task force.’ You say nothing. There’s a pause on the line where you hear nothing but your own breathing before Ryuzaki starts up again, ‘The task force needs you here, Bambi. You’re important. Crucial.’ His voice sounds the same, but you recognise the breath before he spoke as time in which he was picking what to say. You almost forgive him. ‘We don’t have enough hands as it is and we cannot afford to make any mistakes at this crucial juncture-’ Oh you are going to kill him. Does he think of nothing else? You take a calming breath in through your nose, hoping to stabilise your voice and emotions before you speak. 

‘Ryuzaki I-’ You heave a sigh. Scrub a hand over your face. You’re going to have to face this, face him, at some point. It might as well be now. ‘I’ll be in tomorrow,’ you say. You deserve at least a day to get your shit together. 

You hang up on him, turn the volume off and drop the phone back onto your crumpled uniform on the floor. It bounces off the soft material and clatters and against the hardwood. The battery falls out. You dive back into the covers on your bed and resume the show you’d been watching before that rude interruption. You know you said you’d be in tomorrow, but part of you thinks you won’t be ready. How could you be? Ryuzaki can shove his apology up his ass. Never have you been so humiliated and he doesn’t even care. 

*

On the other end of the line, Ryuzaki holds the phone away from his ear, staring at it, wondering if you’d managed to hear him before you hung up. No matter. He chucks the phone at Matsuda without looking and calls for Watari to bring the car round. Leaving Matsuda to furiously attempt to phone you in hopes of giving you a warning.

You’re halfway through a new episode when the doorbell rings. Your head pops up, hair wild and mussed, eyes half closed with sleep at the sound. You don’t think you’re expecting anything. With most of your life having been consumed with the Kira case as of late you’ve already exhausted your take-out budget for the week. Evidenced by the several food containers littering your floor. You wince looking at them. You really should take them downstairs at least, lest you get mice. You wait for a second to see if you can ignore the door but then the bell rings with a second, exponentially longer trill. 

You huff and get out of bed, drawing your blankets up around your neck and holding them closed tight as you shuffle towards the stairs. If you’re being forced to get up and deal with some super aggressive salesman then you’re at least going to be warm as you shout at him. You’re halfway down the stairs again when the doorbell rings a third time, and this time it doesn’t stop. What fucking asshole is at your door? You don’t know but you’re pissed about it. You watch the door handle jiggle as whoever’s behind it tries to just waltz into your home and you are going to rip them a new one. There’s a niggling excitement under all the rage at the prospect of getting to unleash some of your feelings on an unsuspecting stranger. You wonder if that makes you a bad person.

‘I’m COMING!’ You shout, muttering under your breath about impatient, unapologetic assholes as you stomp over to the door. You have to wrestle with the key in the lock because it won’t cooperate in your worked up state. By the time you finally get it unlocked you’re so mad that you swing it open with far more force than necessary and your hand bangs against the wall. ‘Oww.’ You’re momentarily distracted by the pain, looking at your hand as you cradle it until you hear,

‘Bambi.’ Your head snaps up instantly. Standing at your doorway, in all his unrepentant glory, is Ryuzaki. Watching you with what you assume is his version of concern as you hold your bruised hand to your chest. There’s a ridiculous, expensive looking car waiting in the street behind him. So much for inconspicuous.

‘What?’  You grind out, irritated that he’s caught you unawares yet again. Why is he here? You said you’d be in tomorrow. 

‘Are you okay?’ He gestures to your hand.

‘I’m- fine.’ You grit out, turning your face away from him. Ryuzaki reaches out with a hand and you watch, frozen, as he crosses the threshold into your home and brushes a greasy lock of your wild hair back into place. A wave of cold heat rushes over you as you remember your state of dress. The greasy, unwashed hair, the large duvet, the rumpled and stained pajamas from all that eating in bed. You might be mad at the man, but you’ve still got a crush on him and you must look ridiculous.

You’re frozen in place as Ryuzaki slides smoothly past you and into your house like he’s been invited- no, like he owns the place. You turn, almost robotically as you watch him kick off his beat up, bent out of shape trainers and pad barefoot around the place. Familiarising himself with how you live. He stops in your living space/kitchenette as you shut the door and follow him in. Ryuzaki’s still looking around with wide, curious eyes as you say, ‘I told you I was coming in tomorrow. What the ever-living heck are you doing here?!’ Ryuzaki stops looking around at this. His gaze lasers in on you. He pads over, leans in close and visibly sniffs. What the fuck?

‘You need a shower.’ He almost startles a laugh out of you with that. His actions mirror your own a few months ago when he was stinking up the hotel room, zeroed in on some aspect of the case that you were all too distracted by his stench to see- No. You’re mad at him right now. You’re not going to be taken in by this. You choose not to reply. In fact, you can’t reply because the second you open your mouth you’re going to start shouting at the top of your lungs and you usually like to pretend you have more grace and decorum than that. 

Ryuzaki scratches at the back of his head, standing there casually with the other hand tucked in his jeans pocket and for the first time since you met him he looks uncomfortable. Or maybe you’re just better at reading him now. You cross your arms and stare him down. He can explain himself or he can get the fuck out. Ryuzaki doesn’t look at you, staring at a spot on the wall as he says, ‘after you left, Matsuda and Chief Yagami explained the… erroneous nature of my actions towards you. I assure you, I did not mean to embarrass, or humiliate you in any way. I was simply excited about my findings.’

Jesus fuck. Of course he wasn’t thinking about how you felt, only himself. You feel your teeth grate at the admission. But, you already knew he wasn’t the best at reading people. And you also know that he wouldn’t apologise if he didn’t mean it. Instead he’d assume you’d get over it on your own time or not come back. You uncross your arms. His eyes flicker between them and your cocked hip before landing on your face. He’s trying to read your body language. Making an active effort. Try as you might, you can’t stay mad at that, at him. You wonder if he knows it. ‘You could have told me this tomorrow, you know.’ You say softly, all the fight rushing out of you.

Ryuzaki’s staring directly at you now, making an uncomfortable amount of eye contact as he says, ‘I also did not like the idea of you being mad at me.’ You stare at him. Everytime you think you’re getting over it, getting over him, Ryuzaki pulls something like this out of his ass. If you didn’t know any better you’d think he was doing it on purpose, but you know he doesn’t think like that.

‘So you did this?’ You gesture between himself and the door.

‘...I came to your house to make a heartfelt apology? Yes.’ If it was anyone else you’d think he was being passive aggressive, but it’s not, it’s him. If he was angry he’d just tell you. He really means it. He doesn’t seem to see anything weird with how he’s behaved.

‘Ryuzaki, you turned up without warning, rang my doorbell aggressively and then tried to enter the house when I didn’t answer as fast as you liked.’

When he doesn’t say anything you throw your hands up in frustration and start to walk away. May as well take that shower now, since apparently you smell bad. At this point you don’t care whether he stays or goes. 

‘I was worried.’ He says. You freeze on the stairs. He was worried? ‘That you wouldn’t come back to the taskforce. And I did, in fact, warn you. You hung up on me.’ You forget how childish he can be sometimes. But, you did hang up on him. He’s got you there.

You scoff at him either way, ‘I’m quite literally the least experienced officer there, and you’re L. No way in hell you guys need me that much.’

‘We're fighting an unknown serial killer, with an unknown, godlike method of killing their victims and our team is but a handful of people. I know that I upset you, but we do not have time for this bout of self pity or selfishness, whichever it may be. We need you. Your work and your time and your devotion to this case are invaluable. The same way Matsuda’s, Aizawa’s, Ukita’s, Mogi’s, and Chief Yagami’s work on this case is invaluable. I don’t know where you got this idea that your help is lessor because you have less experience than them but it is quite simply wrong.’ He scratches one foot against the other. ‘Or did you not mean it when you told me you were willing to die to catch Kira? Or, more like that you would die if we didn’t let you on the investigation team. That is who we need in this fight against Kira. And if that is not you, then you’re right, and you should just stay home.’

Ryuzaki moves across the room towards you while talking, and you think he’s going to walk right past where you’re standing on the stairs and out the door but he stops just before you, waiting for your response. You kind of want to cry, partially because what he said feels mean, but more so because you know it only feels that way because he’s right. You are being a big baby, putting your personal feelings above solving the case. 

The fight is bigger than this, about more than you. And you’ve been putting your feelings above not only the lives of countless others but above the very concept of community driven justice and anti-authoritarianism itself. Above everything you claim to stand for. Above your coworkers too. Shit. 

You look at Ryuzaki, waiting patiently a few steps below you with an entirely blank expression, like he couldn't care less which way you went. You breathe out heavily through your nose, make eye contact through your tearing eyes and nod determinedly. Ryuzaki nods back once, then looks away from you. You turn to go upstairs and shower. Once you’re out of sight you lift an arm and sniff. Oh Gods. You do need a shower. You hear a sharp but quickly stifled, ‘ha.’ from below you and your ears burn as you realise you must not be as out of sight as you think. 

You shower as quickly and efficiently as possible for not having washed in a near week. No doubt Ryuzaki is sitting oddly somewhere in your very messy house at this point in time. You shudder to think of the observations he might be making about you based on his surroundings. The shower still takes you a minute though. You leave the bathroom in nothing but a towel and nearly drop it when you scream and jump; Ryuzaki is sitting directly across the hallway from you, crouched low in a squat, seemingly zoned out with his thumb between his teeth. He looks up at you and says, ‘you have a nice singing voice.’ Your face flushes with even more colour as you clutch your towel tighter to you. You nod weakly and turn sharply to go into your bedroom when Ryuzaki calls out, ‘Bambi?’

‘Yes?’ You brace yourself.

‘I’ve been thinking about our conversation from before and I wanted to inform you that I think you might be my first friend.’ That is… not what you expected him to say. His first friend? No wonder he’s so… awkward. Just how isolated has being ‘L’ made him? Your heart breaks a little for the man. Ryuzaki continues, ‘So I truly do want to impress upon you the depth of my regret that I embarrassed you before. Also Watari is in there.’

‘I-, you-, what?’ You’re so stunned you can’t get a word out. 

‘You are my first ever friend, I am sorry, and Watari is in there.’ In there? As in, in your bedroom? When you do nothing but stare at him, Ryuzaki elaborates, ‘I was worried you would want to clean up to some degree, given your proclivities for chastising myself over the state of my personal living quarters, but I also didn’t want to infringe on your privacy since I apparently overstepped before, so I called him up to help.’ Ryuzaki’s looking at you with that innocent puppy dog smile again, like he’s so proud of himself. What in the world? How could he think that this is appropriate?- then it clicks: oh. This is revenge. For throwing him in the shower that one time. Just how long does this man hold his grudges for? He couldn’t do the same to you, so instead he’s bided his time until he could catch you on a similarly embarrassing transgression. Maybe he’s had no friends for a reason. You frown and then shake your wet hair as aggressively as you can, showering Ryuzaki in a cloud of very fine droplets of water. Two can play the revenge game, you smirk to yourself.

‘Oops.’ You say, with a closed smile before waltzing into your bedroom. Watari is, in fact, not in there. The room hasn’t been touched. When you stick your head back out into the hallway Ryuzaki is rubbing water off himself with the long sleeves of his shirt tucked over his hands. He waves cheerily when he sees you. So the whole thing was a joke then? Asshole. You think, not sure whether you’re more relieved, amused, or annoyed by this. Shaking the thought from your mind, you quickly change into acceptable work clothes and then gather all take out containers you can find. You can pick up the clothes later but if you know if you leave these sitting here it’ll gnaw at you all day.

Ryuzaki is gone from the hallway when you exit your room. You’re relieved he won’t see you with all this mess, that is, until you get downstairs and see him picking up singular items between his forefinger and thumb and moving them around in your kitchen. You think he might be… tidying? If you could call it that with the awkward way he’s holding things and the time it’s taking for him to decide where they go and then putting them there. Is this the first time he’s ever cleaned? …It’s kind of endearing… in an entitled-rich-asshole-who’s-never-had-to-look-after-himself kind of way. You stuff the rubbish you’re holding into the bin with as little fanfare as possible and clear your throat. ‘Ryuzaki?’ you say. He looks at you, dirty knife dangling, pinched between his two fingers and you gesture with your head towards the door. ‘Shall we go?’ He quickly looks you up and down before nodding once, dropping the knife into the sink as he passes and heading out the door. 

*

The first thing you do when you arrive at the new hotel that’s being used for headquarters is apologise profusely for your absence. You’re brushed off in a way that feels practised and you can’t help but feel relieved. Your coworkers take the time to fill you in on the new plan as Ryuzaki crouches on the couch and stacks little coffee creamer pods on top of each other. 

In two weeks, once the school term has started again, members of the task force including L himself are going to approach the people currently under the most suspicion and introduce themselves as L. The hope is to either eliminate them as plausible suspects entirely, or, in the unlikely case that one of them is Kira, to checkmate them out of being able to kill Ryuzaki or any other of the task force members. 

You think this is the stupidest plan to ever exist, but you have no other. You’ve all spent the last three months pouring over facts and data and CCTV, then rechecking those facts and data and CCTV. Spitballing ideas and plans constantly and somehow the only concrete lead you’ve found is still investigating the families that Raye Penber was assigned to following. Every single dead end leads right back to it.

You understand the logic behind the idea. That if any of these people are Kira, then they won’t be able to kill the supposed ‘L’ without revealing themselves to the rest of you depending on which task force member dies. And you know that everyone will be using fake names and aliases, so if the theory about Kira needing both a name and a face to kill is true then you should all be reasonably safe while investigating them. The thing is, you’re less worried about Kira being one of them, and more worried about him not being one of them. That multiple members of the task force will be exposing themselves and their proximity to L, to Ryuzaki, for no reason. This is still an incredibly risky gamble, no matter how you slice it, but you also know it’s also the only gamble you’ve got. 

After you bring this up,  Ryuzaki remarks that every person involved in this plan would be able to recognise you all as police officers anyway, as they are members of someone in the police force’s family, so the need for absolute discretion is moot. And then he tells you that he already set this plan in motion a month and a half ago when he applied to To-Do university and made contact with Chief Yagami’s son, Light Yagami. 

‘You didn’t tell me this.’ You say.

‘I wasn’t aware that I had to.’ The tower knocks over. Ryuzaki looks up for the first time since this conversation started. He leans forwards as he puts his thumb up to his mouth, rubbing his upper lip with it he says, ‘You’ve been unreachable for nearly five days, Bambi. Of course you’ve missed things.’ Okay, ow. That stings. You grit your teeth and look away. The room is awkwardly silent. Everyone is looking away from you two, pretending the curtains and ceiling are suddenly the most interesting things they’ve seen in their lives. 

Sensing you’re going to get no help from the others, you look back at Ryuzaki and you say, ‘You made this decision over a month ago, probably longer than that with how smart you are and this is the first we’ve- the first I’ve heard about it. I know I’ve been… absent these past few days, but it won’t happen again. You can’t make decisions unilaterally. If you’d told us this before at least we would have had more time to prepare! Cover all angles! Make sure that you’re- that we’re as safe as we can be.’ Your chest is heaving by the time you finish talking.

‘Ryuzaki, perhaps we don’t punish them so harshly for this considering you are the reason they didn’t want to come to work in the first place.’ You’re thankful for the Chief’s interjection, even if it mentions the one thing you don’t want to think about right now.

Ryuzaki looks between you and the Chief, leaning in from where he’s crouched on the couch. Then he looks away and starts stacking the creamer again, ‘I didn’t inform you all of my plans before now as I was afraid that some of you would be against it.’ 

‘After I put cameras in my own home, Ryuzaki?’  Chief Yagami is angry now. 

Ryuzaki pauses his stacking for a second, ‘You’re right. You’ve all proven beyond doubt your dedication to this case, and are not as resistant to my ideas as I expected. If we are going to continue to work together we’re going to have to trust each other fully. I’m sorry I didn’t disclose this right away. I won’t keep anything from any of you in the future.’ 

The room falls quiet and you sink into the seat across from Ryuzaki. He starts making a second tower out of sugar cubes. No one says anything for what feels like an incredibly long time. 

You swallow and break the silence, ‘You promise you’ve thought this through?’ Ryuzaki nods shortly, not looking away from his tower; it’s leaning to one side slightly and he’s trying to readjust it.

‘It’s a net gain. Look at it this way; either we won’t meet Kira, and he won’t kill us, or, we will meet Kira, he won’t kill us and we’ll be that much closer to catching him.’ 

‘You really think you’ll be able to tell if someone is Kira just by telling them you’re L?’

‘That’s really just the conversation opener. I plan to interrogate Light to the best of my abilities under the guise of letting him join the task force. Although it’s not much of a guise if I intend to follow through on it. Or maybe I’ll just tell him I think he might be Kira, I’m not certain yet. It depends on how he reacts.’

‘So you do think my son is a suspect?’ Chief Yagami sounds more tired than angry.

‘I’ve been very clear about this from the start. There is a probability of one percent that your son is Kira. However, even a suspicion of one percent is worth-’

‘-Worth investigating in this case. Yes I agree. Very well then.’ The chief leans back in his seat and closes his eyes. You wonder when the last time he got some proper sleep was.

‘I truly do think we will gain invaluable information from this operation. Best case scenario, if your son is as impressive as I’ve been led to believe, we gain an effective ally against Kira. Worst case scenario, Kira joins the investigation team and cannot kill any of us without revealing himself to the others. No, actually, the worst case scenario is your son Light Yagami is not Kira but also elects not to help us with the case for any number of reasons.’

‘But what if Light is Kira and he just kills all of us?’ Matsuda sounds tense as he brings up the possibility. The chief doesn’t even flinch. 

‘That’s why Watari will be working from a separate, secret location once Light joins the team, and he shall also be known only as another ‘L’, working separately from myself and the taskforce in complete anonymity.’

‘Oh because Light doesn’t know that L is only one person! That’s brilliant!’

‘Thank you.’ Ryuzaki nudges the top cube of sugar into better alignment with the rest of them, ‘Besides, as far as anyone at the university is aware my name is Hideki Ryuuga.’

‘…Hideki Ryuuga… like the singer?’

‘Yes. So even if Light is Kira and lets say he does try to kill me, A.K.A Hideki Ryuuga, we know Kira needs at least a face to kill, so chances are that he thinks of pop idol Hideki Ryuuga and kills him instead.’ Ryuzaki does not look at all bothered about what he just said. You have no idea if he’s joking or not.

You snort out a laugh. ‘You’re holding Hideki Ryuuga hostage?’ 

Ryuzaki looks up at you, puppy smile in place as he says, ‘Smart, isn’t it? There’ll be national outrage if Kira kills beloved pop idol Hideki Ryuuga, shifting public perception of them to resoundingly negative, ensuring any trial does not go in their favour, and we’ll know for certain who they are.’ His toes are wiggling in excitement as he says this. Wow. He is really proud of this plan isn’t he? It’s… cute. And you have to swallow your heart that’s suddenly in your throat before it shows on your face.

It’s so ridiculous you kind of want to laugh, but he’s right. As always. This is the best move in terms of spurring along the investigation; you’ve all been hitting dead end after dead end after dead end for months now, and this is a way forward. Worst case scenario you know for certain you’ve been looking in the wrong place all this time and can start over. Hopefully. Even though that sounds exhausting.. You laugh weakly. ‘Okay, well I’ll stay at the police HQ and man the phones while we do this in case anything goes wrong, since I’m the least prepared after having been off for a week.’ Ryuzaki nods like this was what he expected anyway. 

*

The news of chief Yagami’s heart attack rattles the group; in the days after Matsuda is dropping papers constantly and Aizawa and Ukita are on a hair’s fuse. You think Ryuzaki must be shaken too, since he visited the man in the hospital but he doesn’t show it; the first thing Ryuzaki did when he got back from his meeting with Light was have your coworkers give him a detailed play by play of their investigations and findings. After concluding that none of the suspects were suspicious, Ryuzaki explained that Light would likely be joining the investigation team after his father recovered. He’d gone over the conversation with you all, explaining the traps he’d laid for Light and how he had effortlessly sidestepped them, as if he had known they were coming, or had thought about how he would reply to such questions long before they were ever asked.

Matsuda and Aizawa seemed on the fence about believing him, saying that Light was a very bright kid and that it wasn’t that weird he didn’t fall for whatever traps were laid. Ukita got straight up mad that Ryuzaki was still ‘harping on’ about this, claiming he had no solid proof. Ryuzaki reminded them that his suspicion was only at five percent or so. 

You think Ryuzaki is right. Light sounds too perfect. Again. You’d had to take Ryuzaki’s word on this when he and Chief Yagami had been reviewing the surveillance tapes, having only gotten second hand information on what had happened in them, but after hearing about their conversation in detail you think that Light seems a little too prepared, that or he is a genius rivalling Ryuzaki himself. Which is such an abstract idea you’re not sure you could ever be entirely convinced of it. Sure you’ve heard the Chief talking about what a smart boy his kid was but didn’t all parents wax lyric about their child's talents? 

You’re making your third (and Ryuzaki’s seventh) cup of tea when the news hits. Two cups and a stack of sugar cubes are balanced precariously on a tray in your hands when Watari comes pacing into the room and tells you all to turn to Sakura T.V. right away. The discussion about Naomi Misora immediately dries up at the sense of urgency in his voice. Sakura T.V. is known to air ridiculous, made up specials about the Kira case. They’re experts at fear mongering and stirring up excess panic within the general public against the express wishes of the Japanese police. Usually you all ignore it. You wonder what the hell they could be airing to grab Watari’s attention like this. 

Watari grabs the remote and the telly flickers to life. A presenter appears on the screen and explains that the station and its staff are being held hostage by Kira himself and that they’re being forced to relay a message from him. No way in hell this is real. The presenter goes on to explain how they received several tapes in the mail- of which the first accurately predicted the time of death for two criminals, and how they have been instructed to play the second tape at five fifty-nine P.M. You glance at the clock. It’s currently five fifty-nine. 

You can’t believe it. It seems your coworkers can’t quite believe it either: Ukita expresses this by saying, ‘’This has got to be another one of their fake stories, right?’ 

Matsuda replies, ‘No way… Not even Sakura would go this far.’ You can’t help but agree with him. The tapes must be real, or at the very least Sakura T.V must believe they are. Ryuzaki doesn’t say anything, too busy focusing on the television he’s perched in front of. 

The video starts and the first thing you notice is how… unprofessional it looks. Maybe this actually is a hoax, you think, one they didn’t put much effort into, evidently. But then it can’t be a hoax run by Sakura themselves, because surely they could have at least typed the word ‘Kira’, considering they’ll have an entire department for graphics because they’re a television network. So a hoax, but not by them? Your entire world has zoomed into the television set. There’s a clatter and some far off part of you notes something warm starting to seep into your socks but you brush it off. If there’s even the slightest chance this isn’t a hoax then it’s far more important. 

A voice on the tape starts talking, altered to hide the identity of the speaker. It predicts the death of Kazuhiko Himiba from Taiyo T.V at six P.M. Ryuzaki shouts for Watari to change the channel and Watari does. It switches just in time for you all to see Mr. Himiba collapsed on the news desk in front of him. Ryuzaki shouts for it to be changed back to Sakura T.V. and in the same breath requests Watari retrieve two more television sets. Watari broadly side steps you as he leaves the room and as he does you realise you’ve spilt both the cups of tea on the white-cream carpet below you. And that the liquid has been slowly seeping into your socks. Your feet are soaked. 

You swear silently and side step out of the mess, shaking your feet as you do. Little tea coloured droplets fly off your feet and spatter the carpet below but you don’t even notice them. You quickly realise it’s a lost cause to try salvage your socks and slip them both off, leaving them in the wet pile on the floor as you walk barefoot towards the others, eyes trained on the television set the whole time. You stop just behind the armchair Ryuzaki is crouching on.

Either this ‘Kira’ is incredibly lucky and good at guessing… or they are really ‘Kira’, a ‘Kira’,  because this tape screams ‘FAKE’ at you in big, bold letters and while the evidence may be real you don’t think that the ‘Kira’ is. This is a new ‘Kira’. A less skilled and experienced ‘Kira’. Shit. It can’t be the same one. It can’t be. You refuse to believe the original Kira would stand for this sloppy craftsmanship given the profile Ryuzaki has laid out, neither can you believe he would punish newscasters for speaking out against him- at least, not yet… You’re sure that is, in fact, in his plan somewhere down the line. All authoritarian dictators have an ego built like a brick house, that is a damn near fact. 

This new ‘Kira’ informs of another scheduled death, more ‘proof’ as they put it. Ryuzaki demands the channel be changed again, and true to form the newscaster on Channel 24 has also suffered a sudden heart attack. You can’t believe what you’re seeing. Who would be so… brazen?

Ryuzaki breaks the silence, ‘They said they would be sending a message to people all over the world…’ His eyes widen as he takes in the implications of such a message reaching the masses. ‘We have to make them stop this broadcast or something terrible is going to happen!’

Matsuda lunges for the landline, ‘I’ll get Sakura T.V.’s phone number!’ He shouts. He starts trying several different phone numbers but all lines are busy. 

Aizawa tries to phone someone on his mobile and then says, ‘My friend who works there has his cell phone turned off!’

‘Dammit! Then I’m going over to make them stop it myself!’ Ukita runs out the door at full speed. You can hear Matsuda dialling numbers into the landline as Aizawa curses quietly at his own phone, no doubt trying his friend’s number again. 

You say, ‘Ryuzaki…’ Eyes trained wide on the television set in front of you, your voice sounds foreign to your ears, like it’s coming from someone else. Ryuzaki’s facing Sakura T.V. and Kira’s message is still playing. He waves you off over his shoulder but this is important. You reach out with a shaking hand and fumble a touch on his shoulder, ‘Ryuzaki…’ Your voice is hardly above a hoarse whisper but Ryuzaki must hear something urgent in it as he turns to look at your face. You can’t rip your eyes away from the television, you just stare at it, frozen.

You sit shakily on the arm of his chair as you mumble out, ‘That’s not Kira… I mean-, that is Kira, a Kira, but it’s not the Kira. Kira-Kira. It’s a different Kira. Do you- do you get what I’m saying?’ You can barely manage to keep the tremor out of your voice. You finally manage to tear your gaze away from the television and look at him. Ryuzaki’s got this solemn, urgent look on his face; eyes wide and focused on you, face tilted down, thumb tucked, worried, between his teeth, and you realise he knows. Of course he knows. He’s L. You forget sometimes that under all his quirky genius is, well, genius. 

‘You can’t tell them.’ His voice is a hushed whisper as he nods with his head to behind him. ‘Not until we have a better handle on this. It will only cause them to panic more than they already are.’ You feel your jaw tighten as you nod at him sharply, settling in to sit more properly on the arm of the chair. Ryuzaki reaches up and pats your hand with his own, once, twice and you realise you’re still touching him, one hand braced tightly on his shoulder. You go to take it back but Ryuzaki’s grip tightens ever so slightly over your own when you shift so you leave it where it is and turn your attention back to the T.V.

The ‘Kira’ on the television starts monologuing typical Kira stuff and you only catch parts of it, vision zoomed out. Vaguely you note that you should pay better attention, but it makes you sick listening to it. ‘Kira’ prattles on about how they ‘hate evil’ and are working to create a ‘just society’. They sound like a cult leader, promising peace and security to all that blindly follow with one hand, and promising divine retribution in the form of violence for all those that speak out against them with the other. It’s authoritarian and vile. 

‘Kira’ is bumbling on about the new world they intend to create, parroting the assumed ideology of the original Kira when the smaller monitor that Watari wheeled in, attuned to another news channel, switches to an emergency broadcast of the front of Sakura T.V’s offices. Your breath catches in your throat as you watch none other than Ukita accost the doors to the building, draw his gun, and then drop it before collapsing while fumbling with his belt-alarm. 

‘Ukita!’ Aizawa rushes in front of you and grabs the small monitor in his hands, like he wants to reach through the screen itself and pull Ukita back to safety. There’s a lump in your throat. 

‘Oh my… God! They got him?!’ Aizawa turns and starts to run out of the room.

‘Forget it, Aizawa. Where do you think you are going?’ Ryuzaki’s voice is subdued. It’s the same monotone as normal but it comes out several times quieter than it normally is. If the room wasn’t so dead silent no one would have heard it, but as silent as it is it rings loud in the empty space. Ryuzaki twists round in his seat to say this, so you’re getting up as to not get in the way when Aizawa stops in his tracks. 

Aizawa’s shoulders are up around his ears, and you can hear the barely restrained anger in his voice when he says, ‘To Ukita, where else? And I’m going to get those damn videos and bring them back here.’ 

‘If you go over there now, you’ll only get killed.’ Aizawa turns to look at Ryuzaki. He looks… betrayed. You wince… but it is the truth. He’ll die. This new ‘Kira’ will kill him without a second glance… just like they did Ukita.

‘You trying to tell me to sit here and watch television, Ryuzaki?!’ Aizawa thunders.

‘I’m trying to tell you to calm down and be realistic.’ Ryuzaki’s voice is louder now, but his back is turned to Aizawa and while he’s looking in the right direction, his face is angled down. You realise with a start that Ryuzaki’s deliberately shielding his eyes, hiding the most expressive part of his face from him. You frown and worry your bottom lip between your teeth. 

‘I want to stop that video as much as you do. And if we manage to confiscate the entire package the way it was sent, there’s a good chance we can track Kira down.’ Ryuzaki turns back to watch the television as paramedics transport Ukita’s body away from the scene. ‘But if Ukita was murdered by Kira, whoever goes there now will end up dead too.

‘This means his phoney police ID didn’t help him!! Kira knows our real names! He has to! There’s no other explanation.’ Aizawa is gesturing wildly as he speaks. He needs to calm down but there’s no way to tell him that without upsetting him further. You yourself feel equally upset, with no idea how to make any of this better. Ukita…

‘That might be true. But if you’re right, it would make much more sense for Kira to murder everyone on the task force…’ Ryuzaki’s keyed in, eyes trained on the televisions in front of him in case anything new happens. ‘I deduced that Kira needs to know someone’s name and face to kill them. But from seeing this, I’d have to conclude that seeing their face alone could be enough. All I can say for sure at this time is…’ He pauses, ‘…Ukita was killed because he went over there. It happened just as other networks started reporting from in front of Sakura T.V. And that means Kira is either inside Sakura, or some place where he can see people entering Sakura. That, or he set up a surveillance camera there in advance.’ 

You look between Matsuda and Aizawa helplessly, as you’re facing the room and not the T.V. you can see the strain on both their faces. Matsuda looks helpless, but Aizawa looks like he can’t believe it, or that he won’t. He shouts, ‘Well, if Kira’s around there right now, that’s all the more reason for us to go!!’

Ryuzaki’s head dips again, hands wrapped tightly around his legs, two fingers wiggling one of his toes back and forth in a staccato rhythm. He’s doing it so aggressively it looks like it hurts. ‘I’ll say it again- if you go there now, you will be killed. Please understand.’ 

‘No. I don’t understand.’ There’s a tight fury to Aizawa’s words. He grabs Ryuzaki by the collar of his shirt roughly. You flinch, and your hands try and come up to stop him but your feet won’t move. You’re frozen in place. Aizawa’s shouting now, ‘Ukita might’ve been murdered!! By Kira!! I thought we were risking our lives to arrest that bastard!!’ You want to cry. Aizawa doesn’t seem to understand that if you all go now, that everything will be lost. And Kira will win. Then Ukita will have died for nothing.

Ryuzaki clutches his legs tighter to him, he ducks his head even further as he says, ‘Risking your life and doing something that could easily rob you of your life are exact opposites.’ He sounds exactly the same as normal, except his hands are shaking, overcome by tremors as he clings to his legs like a lifeline. ‘I understand your feelings, but please try to control yourself right now. Ukita is dead… If you go over there and lose your life too, Aizawa…’ Ryuzaki doesn’t continue. Maybe he can’t. You can tell by the look on Aizawa’s face that he finally understands. That Ryuzaki isn’t being callous or unfeeling. He’s feeling exactly the same despair as Aizawa is right now, it's just an impossible situation, and Ryuzaki is attempting to save as many lives as possible. Aizawa lets go of him. 

You restrain yourself from giving Aizawa a dirty look as you walk over to where Ryuzaki is sitting again. You know Aizawa’s upset, but you’re so angry at how he accosted Ryuzaki. You want to rush over and fuss over Ryuzaki to make sure he’s okay but you know now is not the time, and that you might agitate Ryuzaki even further by doing so. You don’t even know if he wants to be touched right now so you ask quietly, ‘Can I sit here?’, gesturing to the arm of the chair again. Ryuzaki nods minutely and you reperch yourself on the edge of the chair. You’re more leaning against it than sitting but you’re just glad to be close to him at all. Ryuzaki’s gaze is focused on the T.V. again, but you feel him pat your wrist clumsily before withdrawing his hand. You breathe in deeply to recentre yourself for whatever comes next. 

It’s silent for what feels like forever but you know rationally must only be a few minutes. The only sound in the room is ‘Kira’ finishing up their manifesto and starting to talk about police cooperation. They say that Sakura T.V. has two more tapes. One to air in the event the police cooperate and the other to air in the event they don’t. ‘Kira’ states that the appropriate tape is to be aired at six-ten P.M. on April 22nd, directly after the police publically report their official response. 

The next sound is so loud it comes out the tiny monitor's little speakers as a tinny screech and then a loud PFFT before the sound cuts out entirely. It hurts your ears and you squeak a little in fright. Ryuzaki tucks an arm around your midriff and leans into you, his face smushing against your hip and the hand that’s playing with his mouth bumping against the top of your thigh. He doesn’t stop looking at the television. You brush a hand over his hair and drop it onto his shoulder, so Ryuzaki knows the touch isn’t unwelcome. He squeezes you minutely in response. You know this is his attempt to comfort you amidst all the chaos and your face flushes for it, but there’s no time to be shy right now so you push the feeling down to investigate later. An armoured truck has crashed through the glass front of Sakura T.V. 's offices. What the fuck.

Kira’s video keeps playing throughout the interruption, which makes sense as it’s pre-recorded, but it is still jarring to hear nonsense such as: ‘If it is an official police announcement, no spokesperson has to appear on screen.’ while watching the front of Sakura T.V.’s building crumple like a house of cards as an official police vehicle bombards through it. 

‘What the hell!’ Aizawa and Matsuda exclaim.

‘Well… That’s certainly one way of entering without anyone seeing your face.’ You snort in response; Ryuzaki’s dry wit during the most inappropriate moments never fails to startle a laugh out of you. ‘But if Kira got Ukita, there’s a good chance he’s inside. If he’s anywhere inside the lobby, this could be really risky…’

‘But who the hell is it? Someone on our side?’ Matsuda questions.

‘Well, it is a police vehicle.’ Aizawa answers him. 

You all watch silently as a suited man wearing his jacket over his head and covering his face drops out of the truck. The video isn’t super clear, being shot from so far away, but the man appears to speak to a security guard inside and then runs off-screen. All you can do now is wait. Your hand drops from your mouth and you place it over Ryuzaki’s, gripping it tight in fear. There’s spit on your index finger from where you’d been worrying your nail with your teeth. You didn’t think to wipe it on your trousers before touching Ryuzaki but he links his fingers through yours either way. At some point during this, someone puts on subtitles for the monitor showing the outside of Sakura T.V.

Another police car drives up to the front of Sakura T.V.’s building. Matsuda says, ‘We aren’t alone in this… There are other cops who’re ready to stand up and fight against Kira…’ It sounds redundant to say considering what you’re viewing on-screen, however after the mass resignation of most of the officer’s on the Kira case at the start of the year, it truly had felt like your tiny team were the only people in the world actively opposing Kira. It warms your heart to see you are not fighting alone.

‘Yes, so it seems.’ Ryuzaki’s voice comes out slightly muffled from where he’s pressed to your side. His head lifts for a second as he readjusts and then leans back in, ‘When you think about it, the people who are in the task force are just one small section of the Japanese police.’ Ryuzaki’s head turns towards the other slightly, ‘Aizawa, you know Deputy Chief Kitamura’s cell phone number, don’t you?’ 

‘Uh, yeah.’

‘Call him. If he picks up, please hand the phone over to me.’ Ryuzaki turns his head back and looks up at you, ‘I’m going to need my hands back for this, Bambi.’ You let go of where you're holding him, and he retracts the arm that’s around you but puts both of them on top of your legs instead, using you as a makeshift table. He takes the phone off of Aizawa when it’s proffered.

‘This is L.’ Ryuzaki says into the receiver.

Logically, you know that Ryuzaki is L. You’ve even thought about ‘L’ in reference to Ryuzaki before but it’s still weird to hear it aloud. Maybe because you weren’t in the room during the meetings where he was still using the alias, maybe because ‘L’ still seems larger than life to you. ‘I have a request. There will be more officers driven to act on their own after seeing this broadcast. Unless strictly coordinated action is taken, we’ll have a major tragedy on our hands.’ 

Like his words are magic, or perhaps a premonition, the officer’s in the police car exit it and immediately collapse, presumably dead. The reporter on scene informs the audience that they will be moving to a safer location, but leaving the camera behind as to continue the broadcast. You listen intently as Ryuzaki-no, as L dictates his plan to Deputy Chief Kitamura over the phone. You’re hoping to help fill any gaps he misses in his reasoning but there are none. L rattles off instruction after instruction, covering all bases and possible weak points Kira could exploit before you even think of them while drumming the fingers of his other hand upon your knee. Just as L’s saying, ‘Yes… That’s right, they should never show their faces.’ Watari’s phone beeps, alerting you all to an incoming call. You keep your eyes trained on the television, you’re determined to help in some way so you’ve decided to focus on being alert to witness if anything changes. 

‘It’s Chief Yagami.’  Watari says.

Matsuda shouts, ‘What? The boss?!’

L holds his hand out for the phone wordlessly before saying, ‘Yes, thank you Deputy Chief Kitamura. No, wait, please stay on the line.’, into the other phone. Watari is already dialling Chief Yagami back on a different phone. He hands the phone to L, who puts it to his other ear. ‘Chief Yagami, it’s me. So it was you in that armoured truck.’ You almost don’t believe it. The man was in the hospital not a half hour ago. You hear L inquire about Chief Yagami’s ‘condition’, which is obviously his recent heart attack, and then ask him to, ‘hold on for a moment’. You pray to any god living that the Chief’s not in need of medical attention. 

L informs the Deputy Chief that it was Chief Yagami in the truck, and then tells Yagami to ‘rest there for five minutes’ before heading out. You let out the breath you’d been holding. The Chief isn’t hurt. Now you can only hope your plan- L’s plan works. You all watch with bated breath as several armoured trucks pull up in front of Sakura T.V. 's offices, and then line after line of police officers decked out in full riot gear file out of the trucks and line up in front of the building. With the trucks and the officer’s in place, your view of the ground floor from the news broadcast is completely blacked out and you are filled with a strange mix of anxiety and relief. At least you know it’s effective. Whether it will work on Kira is another question entirely.

You all wait with baited breath. The way the line of sight to Sakura T.V. is blocked is both an incredibly good sign and an excruciating anxiety inducer because you can’t see what is going on. You have to keep reminding yourself that that means Kira probably can't either, so it’s a good thing. The wait feels incredibly long, but eventually the door behind you bursts open and Watari staggers in, supporting the Chief’s body weight on his shoulder. 

‘Chief!’

‘Chief, sir…’

The Chief looks bedraggled. Sweaty and slumped as he leans heavily on Watari. Your heart fills with worry for him. He raises his head slightly to look at Ryuzaki, and even that looks like it takes a tremendous amount of effort. He says, ‘I’m sorry for taking things into my own hands like that Ryuzaki… I let my emotions get the better of me…’ 

‘That’s fine,’ Ryuzaki replies. 

‘The video tapes. The envelope they all came in. It’s all in here.’ The Chief is panting and holding a paper bag emblazoned with, ‘Sakura T.V.’. His face doesn’t even flicker as he takes in how close you’re both sitting, he just hands the bag to Ryuzaki over the back of the armchair before turning around to collapse onto a nearby couch with the help of Matsuda, saying, ‘Let me lie down for a while.’

While the Chief may have had no reaction to it, it doesn’t change how rapidly it dawns on you how unprofessional you both must look, but before you can get up Ryuzaki props the bag open on your lap and starts digging though it. You see him mouthing words to himself as he looks through the items, carefully cataloguing them in his mind before extracting them out. He hands the envelope to Aizawa, with a request to send it to forensics. 

You can hear Matsuda on the phone in the background while Aizawa tells Ryuzaki that he knows people on the team, and that they should be able to get fingerprints, as well as maybe DNA from the stamps, as well as information about where everything was bought from, possibly including the make and model of the camera the tapes were filmed on. Aizawa also says he’ll be sure to make the team study the tapes without sound, so they don’t hear what’s on them.

Ryuzaki picks up the bag and drums his fingers once against your knee sharply, so you stand up. He stands to his full height on the armchair before clambering down and you’re struck again by just how tall he is, even slouched. He lopes over to the coffee table before putting the items down on it. You help him sort the tapes from the copies and hand the original’s over to Aizawa. Matsuda comes over to tell you both that he’s going to drive the Chief home and then come back. Ryuzaki tells him that it’s better to get a good night's sleep instead and come back tomorrow fresh along with everyone else. 

Oh. Somehow, in all of this mess, you’d forgotten about going home. Usually you can’t wait to tuck up into your bed and sleep off the stress of the day, but thinking about it right now your house just seems big and empty, the last place you currently want to be, so you say, ‘Actually… Ryuzaki… I was hoping I could stay? I don’t think I’m going to get any sleep after everything that’s happened, and I started later than everyone else because I stayed late last night so I’m not that tired anyways. I feel fine.’ Doubt clouds your mind for a second that maybe Ryuzaki wants you all gone so you add. ‘Um, if you want to study what’s on those tapes yourself first I can put on some headphones and just work on acquainting myself with anything else I missed last week.’

Ryuzaki is studying one of the physical copies of the tapes on the table. He doesn’t pause in turning it over in his hands as he says, ‘you can stay.’ You let out a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding.

Aizawa ducks out first, then Matsuda and the Chief make their exit together. You shout out for the Chief to get home safe and get some rest before walking back into the room. You walk over to where Ryuzaki is perched on the couch facing the table. He’s lined up all the tapes in a row, and behind you you can hear Watari setting up the VCR. Ryuzaki looks at you and then over at Watari and says, ‘We should move the couch.’ 

It’s not at all what you’re expecting to hear so you say, ‘What?’ Ryuzaki repeats himself like you didn’t hear him. 

‘No, I get it, I heard you I just- why?’

Ryuzaki looks at you and then looks over to the television set. ‘So we don’t have to try and sit on the same tiny armchair. Why aren’t you wearing socks?’ Ryuzaki’s looking at your bare feet now. 

Your face colours. ‘Yes, right. Of course. So we don’t have to share a chair. Okay.’ You’re nodding like it should have been obvious to you. Like you weren’t fully thinking about sitting nearly on him again. No, there would be a respectable distance left between you both now that there is no on-going crisis that you aren’t coping well with. You’re going to sit nicely apart. Like normal coworkers, where one of them doesn’t have the biggest crush in the world on the other. Like-

‘Your feet. Why are they bare?’ Ryuzaki’s looking you right in the eyes and you feel caught somehow, exposed like you did something wrong. Embarrassed you were yet again swept away in your thoughts, you splutter out, ‘Why are you barefoot huh?’ Your body feels hot. Nerves open and sparking like a live wire.

Ryuzaki looks down like it never occurred to him, and his toes wiggle like they’re saying hello, ‘I’m always barefoot. You take your shoes off because, and I quote, ‘the carpet is too nice in here for me to ruin with my muddy footprints,’ even though you never have mud on your shoes. You’re never barefoot.’ 

‘I-’ You look down at your toes. You don’t know  why you’re barefoot. Then it comes flooding back to you in a rush, and you remember. Your stomach drops. ‘Oh shit. The carpet!’ 

You turn on your heel and sprint over to where you dropped the tea earlier. Ryuzaki chokes from somewhere behind you at your profanity. Shit shit fuck. You can’t believe you forgot- how could you forget? You’re so stupid. The stain is huge. How could you-?

You need something to clean with. What can you clean with? You shuffle through the drawers and cupboards in the tiny kitchenette and find nothing. You quickly scan the room behind you, just couches and Ryuzaki staring at you over his shoulders with wide eyes. You try the bathroom and as soon as you find something suitable you run back through.

You drop to your knees over the stained patch of carpet and start trying to soak up as much as you can. You can feel tears start to prick at your eyes. It doesn’t budge. Not even a little. Your movements are frantic, panicked and jerky, desperately trying to soak up the copious amounts of cold tea that’s been steeping in the white cream carpet when you hear Ryuzaki pad up behind you. His bare feet creep into your view before he crouches down beside you and puts a hand on your back. 

‘It’s just a carpet.’ He doesn’t sound worried.

‘Yes, but it’s not my carpet and I ruined it.’ Your voice comes out choked, small and you curse it in your head. Trying not to cry over something so small, you curl into yourself, ashamed as a sob chokes rattles your chest and escapes wetly out your mouth. You’re not even dabbing at the floor anymore, just clutching what you think might be an old shirt between tight fists, as you slowly realise it’s probably Ryuzaki’s old shirt, given this is his hotel room. You don’t even know where you got it from. ‘Oh.’ You say, voice tight and small as you stare at it. ‘Ryuzaki, your shirt. I didn’t-’ Another sob escapes you, ‘I didn’t even realise. I’m sorry.’ You feel pathetic, body screwed up tight and small, curled over your knees and trying to hide your face from him. Your knees are cold from where they’re pressed into the wet patch on the carpet. 

Ryuzaki reaches out and loosens your grip on the shirt. You watch as his long pale fingers wrap gently around your own and then firmly squeeze until you manage to let go. He takes it from you and drops it on the floor out of your reach. You cover your face with your shaking hands. You don’t care that they’re kind of damp from the tea, you don’t want to look at him.

‘Leave it. Watari will deal with it later. Or, housekeeping will.’ Ryuzaki pulls your hands away from your face. 

You’re so embarrassed. Your face must be red and splotchy and you can feel your eyes watering with unshed tears but Ryuzaki looks at you the same way he always does. Like you’re no different. His eyes are set wide with curiosity as normal, the only difference is that he’s very close to your face. Like centimetres away. If you focused you could probably feel his breath. Is Ryuzaki… worried? ‘You said you were fine.’ The way he says it doesn’t sound accusatory. You worry it is all the same.

You nod, sniffing, wipe at your nose with your elbow. ‘I thought I was,’ you say weakly. 

Ryuzaki looks down for a second, mouth a flat line, clearly thinking before he says, ‘What we saw today would have shaken up anyone. It would be weirder if you weren't affected…’ There's a pause before he says, ‘…Would a hug help?’ You nod, shakily and Ryuzaki uses his grip on your hands to pull you up and onto him, wrapping his arms tight around your back. Ryuzaki sits back out of his usual pose, with his legs on either side of you. He tucks your face into his neck and lays his hand on the back of your head. He holds you tightly, arms and legs pressing into you from either side, and the compression of it helps you calm down. 

It takes a second but soon you feel calm enough to notice the mild rocking motion Ryuzaki’s doing. You don’t know if he’s doing it for you or if it’s just a subconscious movement. You sniff wetly against his neck and laugh. What a hellish day. ‘What?’ Ryuzaki asks. His voice is low against your ear and an involuntary shudder runs through you at the timbre of it. You hope he doesn’t notice.

‘Nothing. I just- I can’t believe how real this has suddenly gotten. I mean, Ukita…’ Your voice breaks, and you hiccup slightly.

Ryuzaki pulls back from you at this. Props you up with two hands on your shoulders. You take the opportunity to wipe some of the wetness off your face and try to smile weakly at him.

‘You don’t have to be here. It’s only going to get more dangerous from this point onwards. If any part of you is doubting your conviction, you’re free to leave. No, if that’s the case then you should leave. No one will blame you.’

You shake your head tiredly. ‘In for a penny, in for a pound, right?’ Sensing Ryuzaki’s about to undercut you again, you say, ‘I’m not doubting myself. This hasn’t changed anything for me. If anything it’s made me more determined to catch Kira- the Kira’s. To avenge Ukita if nothing else. Today was just… a lot.’ 

Ryuzaki nods at the conviction in your voice more than your words. ‘Then we should get started.’ He runs a thumb over your cheek then tugs pointedly at the wet fabric around your knees. ‘You should take a shower, Bambi.’ Ryuzaki gets to his feet and offers you a hand, the other tucked nonchalantly in his pocket. His whole body leans to one slide with his slouch and you find yourself unintentionally sitting on your knees before him, his hips angled out towards your face. 

You’re suddenly hit in the face with how much you want to put Ryuzaki’s cock in your mouth and suck until he meets God. How can he be so attractive doing something as simple as standing? You think maybe there’s something wrong with you, swinging from panicked to horny in a second flat but maybe not normal is normal when you’ve suddenly come face to face with mortal peril. ‘I’ll have Watari leave out a set of clean set of clothes for you. In the meantime, I’m going to review the tapes by myself, then I can summarise them for you before we watch them together so you’re prepared.’ Face flushed hot with what you’ve been thinking, you tear your eyes away from Ryuzaki’s pelvis to grab his hand and allow him to help you up. You’re surprised he doesn’t call you out for spacing again but maybe he thinks it’s part of your mini-breakdown. Or he’s just being nice.

‘I- Thank you.’ You can’t meet his eyes. You can feel Ryuzaki’s gaze on your face so you duck your head and turn away. You practically run down the hallway to the bathroom with your tail tucked between your legs.  You hear, ‘You’re welcome.’ as you enter the bathroom, so you stick your head back out the door to catch sight of Ryuzaki’s back as he casually turns towards the living area. Did he… watch you walk away? No. Couldn’t be. You’re overthinking.

You shake your head clear and step back into the bathroom. Inside the room there’s an empty vanity in front of a huge mirror with several white fluffy towels stacked on it; good to know you won’t have to go looking for those. The shower is behind a large glass panel which quickly steams up when you turn the water on. The heat of it helps you calm down your anxious racing thoughts and steady the tremble in your hands. 

Only after you’ve washed all the panic away and are stepping out does it occur to you that you don’t have any clean clothes inside the bathroom. You know Ryuzaki said that Watari would get you some but maybe you were supposed to get them off him before? Your mind starts to race before you take a deep breath to calm yourself down. It doesn’t matter. You’re okay. You dry yourself off and wrap yourself tightly in the towel. The cold rush of air when you open the door causes you to pause before leaning out of the bathroom slightly, ‘hey, Ryuzaki?’ You call out to him.

‘On the floor.’ Is the clipped response you get. You can hear the television from where you’re standing, but you’re not sure what tape Ryuzaki is on. You look down. Oh. There’s a white t-shirt and some plaid pyjama pants folded at your feet. You snort slightly. Of course. Sometimes you wonder how the hell you became a police officer in the first place. You pick up the clothes and retreat into the bathroom to put them on. 

The shirt is a soft cotton and sits on you nicely. You note it's the same shape and style as Ryuzaki usually wears with a distant fondness and-oh. You really are unobservant sometimes. You didn’t realise, because the trousers are clearly pyjama bottoms, made of a blue plaid with some gold threads running through them, and not the jeans he usually wears but these look like Ryuzaki’s clothes because they are Ryuzaki’s clothes. Oh.

You bring the front of the shirt up to your nose and inhale. It mainly smells like laundry detergent but clinging to it in an undercurrent there's the unmistakable smell of him. Unmistakable from the amount of times you’ve pushed him towards the shower but this scent isn’t a bad one, it’s more akin to the fond feeling behind a lingering hug or a wet day after a bout of unending dry heat. Familiar and welcome. 

The pyjama bottoms are so long on you, you have to pick them up when you walk. You stumble only once while walking back through to the room. Ryuzaki has moved the furniture around so that the couch is angled in front of the television. There’s an open laptop on the floor in front of the couch and you wonder what it was he was looking up. One of the Kira videos is paused on the television, and Ryuazaki is perched on the couch in front of it eating a slice of cake with a small fork, one that seems designed for cake specifically from the looks of it. Ryuzaki gestures with the fork when he notices you’re in the room and you see that on the arm of the couch there’s a small plate with another slice and a cake fork on it for you. Ryuzaki presses play on the video once you’ve picked it up and sat down.

The first video is as Sakura T.V. described it, predicting the deaths of Seiichi and Seiichi Machiba at seven P.M. with nothing else on it. The second is the same one that aired on television earlier this evening. Once it’s finished Ryuzaki pauses the T.V. and then turns to you. ‘Earlier, after watching this video for the first time, you deduced that there was not one Kira, but two. And that this video was, in fact, made by the latter- that is to say, not the original. An astute observation, and one I shared in. What led you to this conclusion?’

You place your plate on the ground in front of you, then shift in your seat to turn and face Ryuzaki, swinging your legs up on the couch between you both and then tucking your feet into the ends of the pants. The edges of Ryuzaki’s mouth turn up when you do this. ‘Well… Kira’s never made a public statement before, right? At least, not one with words.’ You tap the end of your fork against your knee, thinking, ‘And they must have an incredible amount of pride, given what you’ve said on their motives before and considering the ego they’ve displayed; the clues they sacrificed just to get a point across to you… Points that the rest of us missed out on entirely before you explained them as well, and if Kira is as smart as we think then they would know that. So clearly they’ve got a thing about you specifically. Like when they killed your stand in on live T.V. and then couldn’t kill you after. It must have driven them crazy, trying to show the world that Kira is God only to have their plans fouled so easily on live television. Maybe that’s when it started… 

‘And you were able to use that to figure out they need a name, or needed a name. So they’re baited pretty easily. All of this says they’re a very proud person. They’d have to be to think that they alone can be judge and jury of all criminals.

‘And adding in the fact that they’ve seen your logo with the voice changer and everything from back then and I just… I couldn’t believe that that person, that incredibly childish and egotistical and selfish person who has decided they’re in a heads on battle with you, L, would put out a video that doesn’t even have typed font! They just… don’t fit the profile.’ You shrug. ‘That’s the first thing I thought, when I saw it.’ You do air quotes, ‘This is a hoax. Kira wouldn’t put something so unprofessional out. Not as their first commandments or whatever- because that’s how they’d think of it. …But then they killed five people on live television, so… obviously not a hoax, just a copycat. The real Kira is probably seething right now.’

Ryuzaki hums, considering what you’ve said, and drums his fingers on the edge of his knee before saying, ‘Interesting... I had the exact same thoughts. Shoddy craftsmanship, the handwriting, the use of an at-home-video camera; all of this suggests that whoever made this video has priorities other than addressing the general public as a spokesperson for Kira or as Kira themselves, or they’d care more about the presentation. So there’s potentially a hidden agenda. There’s also the inconsistent sound quality, which suggests that this was recorded in segments, likely this Kira was interrupted while filming and had to rewind the tape to re-record those parts- whereas I think the real Kira would have recorded the whole thing in one take, no matter how many times it took. 

‘This Kira seems to be lacking in both patience and technical know-how, as the sound quality is far worse than if they had just used a voice changer. No. It’s likely the audio was recorded on another device and then played back and picked up by the camera’s microphone. Plus, they copied the font I use when presenting as ‘L’ to the public, when Kira would likely want to set himself apart from me, as if Kira ever gets my name they will likely try to kill me and then villianise me. The font association between us would not be something they want linking us together no matter how petty they are… 

‘Moreover, the criminal’s who are predicted to die in the first tape are both low-level drug offenders. I looked it up while you were in the shower. They’re the kind of criminal that’s only reported in gossipy magazines, not major news outlets. Every time Kira has wanted to make a statement, or respond in some way to an assumption that we have made and has been taken note of somewhere in the NPA’s records, he has used high-profile criminals that at their times of death were incarcerated so that they would be found by prison guards immediately. This makes me think that this ‘second Kira’ wanted to avoid any high profile criminals, lest the original Kira killed them first and rendered their predictions incorrect. 

‘Considering all these ideas put together, I believe the real intention of these videos is to let Kira, the real Kira, know that they have a supporter out there with the same, or better, powers and that they’re willing to use them to aid Kira in their cause. In all probabilities, the second Kira made this video to get the original Kira’s attention and praise. They seem to be incredibly childish with no real regard for the value of human life, fitting for a minion of Kira.’ 

Ryuzaki gets quiet after saying all this, looking intensely at his knees. You think that he’s lost in thought when he snaps his head up to look at you and says, ‘You’ve got very good reasoning skills, most people wouldn’t come to such a conclusion so quickly. I see now why you became a police officer… However, I do disagree with you on one part.’ Ryuzaki leans over the edge of the couch to take another slice of cake, proffered by Watari. He immediately takes a huge bite of it.

You’re silent for a moment,‘...You see now?’ 

Ryuzaki gives you a sheepish smile. ‘I did doubt your conviction for a moment there-’

‘I already said sorry for-!’

‘No, not that. When you first arrived at headquarters. You were so… timid. Especially compared to the you that demanded to be put on the Kira taskforce otherwise you would go on a suicide mission to hunt them down yourself. After meeting you in person, I thought you would get a glimpse of the danger involved in this case and go running home, tail tucked between your legs. But you’re not like that at all, are you?’ Ryuzaki’s looking at you with  searching eyes and you’re not sure what to say.

You should be offended. You want to be offended but he’s looking at you so intently with wide eyes and a slight upturn to the sides of his open mouth, finger playing with his lip like he does when he’s focusing. Like you’re a puzzle he can’t quite figure out and you feel… important and exciting. Like the world could end and you’d be just fine as long as he keeps looking at you like that.

‘You’ve got a lot more conviction that I initially gave you credit for, but conviction alone doesn’t make for a good cop, a decent one, maybe, but good? No. You need to understand how criminals think for that. And you do. I think with some training you would become a force to be reckoned with. You’ve got the makings of a detective about you, Bambi.’  Ryuzaki looks up at the ceiling, face inquisitive as he tries to recall something, ‘It doesn’t happen often- actually, I don’t think it’s happened ever, but I am quite happy to have been wrong about you.’ He flashes you what you think is supposed to be a winning grin but comes out far softer and slightly lopsided, like he’s inviting you into his personal world with nothing but a smile and your brain short circuits with want.

‘I- um, thank you…’ You say quietly. You’re scrambling for what to say in response to his compliments as Ryuzaki shoves the last of his cake in his mouth. He points at the leftover cake on your plate with his fork and a question in his raised brow and you nod, mutely. Ryuzaki leans over, places his hands on the floor, and uses them to ‘walk’ over to the plate and grab it before sitting up. You snort. It’s both incredibly childish, and a ridiculously casual display of athleticism. Very Ryuzaki of him. Seeing him be so normal helps you reorganise your thoughts and remember what you were talking about before he derailed you with sentiments of incredible sincerity. ‘Ryuzaki. You said before that you disagreed with me on one of my points. Which was it?’

‘Kira,’ It comes out garbled; Ryuzaki has a terrible habit of speaking with his mouth full. You watch him chew twice, very deliberately, then swallow. He points with the fork as he talks. ‘The real Kira, is not angry. At least, not properly. They're more likely ecstatic right now and thinking of how best to use this other Kira to their advantage. That is if they saw the broadcast. Which they will at some point, we just won’t know when exactly that is. But, think of it this way, Kira has just gained a follower who believes in their ‘commandments’, as you put it, with enough conviction to not hesitate before killing five people on live television. They also seem to have the power to kill without needing someone’s name. Kira has just gained an incredibly powerful ally. We cannot allow these two Kira’s to meet. It would be disastrous for us.’

‘Oh. Yeah that makes sense.’ You look back down at your feet. There’s a loose thread on the pyjama bottoms you’re wearing and you pick at it.

‘Don’t misunderstand. I’m still very impressed.’ You look up at that. ‘I think you’ve got a very good understanding on who Kira likely is, from the profile. However, you missed the bigger picture part of this, which is that Kira will constantly be thinking, ‘how can I use this to my advantage?’ We should be thinking of how Kira will be attempting to use this, but also how we can use this. 

‘Now, tell me what you meant when you said, ‘commandments’. You think he’s trying to start a religion?’ He takes another bite of the cake in front of him, scraping icing around on the plate to get the optimal bite.

‘More like a cult.’ You snort. Ryuzaki just stares at you, chewing. He gestures for you to continue with his fork when you don’t say anything more.

‘Well… I don’t think it’s like, anything they’re trying to do on purpose, y’know.’ You prop your chin on your knees and look away from Ryuzaki’s eyes, chewing your lip and fiddling with your toes. His stare is too heavy, revealing. It’s like he sees into your head and how much you value what he has to say, ‘You said once that Kira thought of themselves like a God right? I just figured that’s how they would think of it. Their first public appearance. It’s gotta be important to them. That’s why I thought they’d be angry. Not only was it taken from them, it was taken by someone with the same powers but clearly less skill and intelligence, meaning that Kira is no longer special.’

Ryuzaki nods slowly, ‘I agree. How they’ve been slowly seeding their rhetoric in the public consciousness without actually saying anything is likely so that each person subconsciously tailors it specifically to their own individual morals. Actions are much easier to misinterpret and misalign with your own sense of justice than words. Any degree of evil can be excused if you don’t think the person doing the evil is intending to be evil. So having someone else, no less someone with considerably less intelligence putting out a message relaying,’ Ryuzaki does air quotes, ‘‘Kira’s’ intentions so plainly, especially with the killing of innocents involved, I do not think they will be happy per se. However, I do think they will be putting a positive spin on this. They’ve gained an incredibly powerful ally for what could shape up to be a minor setback. Plus, once Sakura airs this fourth tape, they’ll have all the more reason to be thankful.’ 

Ryuzaki gestures to the frozen T.V. screen, speaking with his mouth full again. He swallows, you watch his throat bob and you think about placing your hand against it and feeling the movement. The thought rattles around your brain, blocking out his voice and reverberating until it’s all you’re thinking about… Sitting in his lap, feeding him cake with your hands, feeling his neck as he swallows…  Letting him lick the icing off your fingers, pressing them down against his tongue... If he would gag… If his wide eyes would water as he stares at you, his pale lips glistening with saliva, his spit coating your fingers and running down your arm.

‘-Bambi?’ Oh shit. ‘Did you hear what I said?’ Seriously, what is wrong with you today? Your emotions seem to be on a hair trigger because of everything that’s happened.

‘Oh, um. No, sorry I got- got distracted, I-um.’ You don’t know what to fucking say. You don’t know why it’s happening now of all times. Maybe because it’s the first time you’ve been alone with him since it happened; the last time you got ‘distracted’ Ryuzaki called you out in front of the whole room and told everyone you were thinking about fucking him. Your face heats and you have to sit back a little with how fast the blood has rushed to your head. Anxiety pricks at the back of your neck and your face feels hot and you’re a little humiliated and he hasn’t even said anything. Yet. You’re waiting for him to say something when you feel a hand brush the side of your neck and settle on your shoulder. 

‘Breathe.’ Ryuzaki says and you realise you’ve got your eyes screwed shut, but you can’t quite bring yourself to open them and look at him. His hand squeezes slightly and you notice that your shoulders are tucked up around your ears, tense. With a little effort you move them back down. You’re mentally preparing to open your eyes again, embarrassed at being caught out and then even more embarrassed at freaking out over it when Ryuzaki’s hand slides down to your forearm, hooks behind your elbow and pulls. Your eyes fly open in shock as you go flying forwards with a squeak, Ryuzaki catches you by placing his other arm on your midsection as you move. You land on his chest with an ‘oof’ noise. His hands slide round to the small of your back as you lie there, mind reeling. Just how strong is Ryuzaki? He clearly practises some kind of martial art from how smooth that was. 

One of Ryuzaki’s hands comes up to smooth over your hair and you go, ‘Um… what?’ He huffs a laugh breathlessly above you. You feel his chest contract beneath you with the sound. 

‘You looked like you were panicking again. This was what helped before.’ Oh. That’s so… sweet, you think. Ryuzaki’s legs are spaced on either side of you, knees up as usual but all his weight is leaned back against the couch. Your face is tucked against his chest, so you don’t have to worry about hiding your smile from him. The weight of his hand rubbing circles on your back is more… distracting than calming, but your panic has completely dissipated with his touch. Maybe you were more worried about what he thinks of you than what you were actually thinking about. 

‘I guess I was right.’ Ryuzaki says. His voice is a deep rumble with your ear pressed to his chest like this. His hand leaves the back of your head and his thumb brushes along the curve of your smile. Your eyes widen. Huh. Maybe you’re not as hidden as you thought. You feel your face flush cherry red so you bury it in his chest. Ryuzaki puts his hand back on your nape.

You should say something. You know you should say something, excuse your behaviour somehow but you don’t know how to. Your mind is racing yet somehow entirely blank. The only thought in there is chasing itself around, slipping between variations of ‘he’s so pretty’ and ‘oh sweet fuck, I can feel him pressed against me’ and ‘this is so… nice’. The last one is somehow more surprising than you think it should be.

Ryuzaki’s hips flex as he shifts how he’s sitting to make himself more comfortable underneath you. Oh god. He grabs the remote from where he left it. ‘You really need to work on your focus. I’ll let you off this time, since it’s been a rough day for all of us. But, really, think of today this way: we’ve gained an invaluable opportunity to move forward with the case here.’ Yes. The case. That’s what you’re distracted by, not… other things. You wonder for a second if there is something actually wrong with you considering everything that’s happened today and all you can think about is how Ryuzaki feels pressed up against you.

‘Can I put in the next tape?’ Ryuzaki asks, and you thank god for the distraction from your… distraction, as another thought has joined the relay going on in your brain and it’s the feeling of Ryuzaki flexing his hips against you over and over. What it would be like if he did it on purpose…. If it would feel any different with the proper intention behind it… You squirm slightly from where you’re laid between his legs, nodding at him and pretending your pussy isn’t starting to tingle with the thoughts that you’re having. 

Ryuzaki calls out for Watari to ask him if he can change the tape, and you latch onto it for something to think about other than him and the way his arms are wrapped around you.

‘I have a question.’ You say quietly into Ryuzaki’s chest.

‘Is it to do with the case?’ He asks.

‘No. Not really.’ You cringe, thinking he’s not interested in hearing it but Ryuzaki simply hums and continues tracing circles on the small of your back with the hand not holding the remote.

‘Hmm… You’d better ask it before I start the tape then.’

‘Is Watari- I mean, what is his- your-’ you address Watari, who is kneeling beside the television in the middle of changing the tape, ‘-job exactly? I thought he was like, your liaison to the police but his role seems to extend much further than that. I mean he cleaned up the tea I spilt earlier and I just… I feel bad that he-you,’ you address Watari again, ‘had to do that for me…’ 

You can feel Ryuzaki’s gaze on you, and you crane your head up to look at him as you chew your lip anxiously. There’s a moment of silence where he just watches you; he’s obviously satisfied with whatever he finds on your face when he says, ‘Watari is my handler and, technically, my carer. He handles all the work I am unable or unwilling to do, which includes his work as a police liaison, and more to facilitate my detective work.’ You nod slowly. You don’t ask what the ‘more’ is.

‘Oh.’ You deflate slightly. That makes sense. You don’t know what you were expecting him to say. You kind of feel like a dick for thinking of Ryuzaki as spoiled when he was in your house earlier. Maybe it’s less he doesn’t know how to clean and more that he can’t, for whatever reason. 

Although he is still certifiably rich given all the hotels, he also doesn’t think twice about sharing what he has; he lets task force members come and go as they please, pays for meals had while at the headquarters, and he normally offers you some of whatever sweet he’s munching on ever since he found out about your sweet tooth. Honestly, you’re not quite sure what to make of all of it, but his life suddenly makes a hell of a lot more sense but also seems indiscriminately more complex now that you know this.

The only thing you’re really certain of is that you think that Watari may not be the best person for the role considering he was content to let Ryuzaki sit unwashed for the better part of two weeks before you managed to make him shower. Then again, Ryuzaki is L, and he can certainly hold his own when he wants too. Plus, you’ve not exactly seen any other staff around, so there’s clearly more to the hiring criteria than you’re aware of. Maybe it’s something you’ll never really understand, or something that you don’t have to, and you just have to accept it.

You say, ‘Okay, but still I should have-’

‘I assure you that I am both paid exceptionally well and am more than fulfilled in my role here.’ Watari cuts in.

You start at how suddenly Watari breaks his silence, and immediately feel bad when Ryuzaki says ‘Ow.’, in a plaintive tone of voice. You accidentally elbowed him. You know Ryuzaki well enough by now to know that tone, if he has it, means absolutely nothing but this sounds put on. Petulant. You lift yourself up slightly and see him rubbing his side where your elbow dug in, with his lower lip sticking out in an exaggerated pout. You don’t know if he’s putting it on because he is hurt or just because he’s fucking with you. You want to kiss the pout off him quite desperately either way. ‘Sorry.’ You say, lightly rubbing the area with your hand in way of apology. 

The pout disappears, instead being replaced with his usual puppy dog smile. ‘I forgive you.’ He says. Ryuzaki tugs you back down on top of him. The issue is cemented as resolved when he smooths his hand over your hair and says, ‘Stop worrying about the tea. You were having a panic attack. You weren’t capable of sorting it yourself.’ 

You lift your head slightly, preparing to argue when Ryuzaki hits you with such a dry stare it makes the words die in your mouth. He continues, ‘You were scrubbing the floor with a dirty t-shirt and I don’t even know where you got it from.’ You shrink away from his gaze slightly, embarrassed by the memory. Ryuzaki places his hand on the back of your head and says, ‘Everyone needs help sometimes. Stop beating yourself up. Now, shh. And watch.’ He presses play on the remote and the third Kira video starts. 

This one denotes the terms which Kira Two, as you’ve dubbed them, expects the police to follow in their acquiescement to working with them. They state that they want even more criminal’s names to be aired on television, with special focus on those who are cruel to the vulnerable or where people were injured, and that Kira alone will get to be judge and jury. Then they state that they want L, alongside the top NPA officials, to appear on television to make an announcement that the police are working with Kira. Which is obviously a ploy to kill L and hold the police force hostage in the case they disagree with Kira down the line or wish to renegade on their decision. 

You snort, and say, ‘Fat chance of either of those things happening.’

‘Actually, the next tape says basically the same thing, with the exception of it being either myself or the Director General of the NPA who dies as penance for the police's refusal to work with Kira. And I can’t exactly allow the Director General of the NPA to die on my behalf considering I am the one who challenged Kira in the first place’ 

You feel like you’ve had a bucket of ice tipped over your head. ‘...Are you serious?’ You say, frowning. You lean up on your arms to better look at his face. 

‘Why wouldn’t I be serious?’ He asks, gaze trained on your own. You sit up, hands on your knees and look at him appalled. 

‘How in hell can you be serious? This Kira can clearly kill without a name! They killed Ukita and two other cops earlier tonight! You’ll die, Ryuzaki.’

Ryuzaki leans up on his elbows, ‘I know that. But if it’s my life or his, mine is inherently less valuable.’

‘Don’t say that. Why would you say that? There has to be another way!’ You can feel yourself tearing up. You curse your damn emotional regulation and the fact you cry at a hint of frustration.

Ryuzaki rubs his thumb over his lip while looking away from you. ‘I’m afraid not. And I cannot let another man die in my place when it’s me they’re after.’ Ryuzaki sits up fully and leans over to wipe a tear from your cheek that you hadn’t noticed escaping. ‘What’s wrong? Why are you so upset over this?’ His voice is soft, still a bleeding monotone but he’s speaking quietly, like he’s more worried than irritated. ‘You knew that this was a possibility, that in going head to head with Kira any one of us could die- would die, for the greater good. That’s what this task force is for. You’ve said as much yourself before. What changed?’ 

‘Because I don’t want to lose you okay!’ You hiccup, and try as you might to keep it inside the hiccup turns into a full blown sob. You brush his hand away from your face and try hide in between your knees, ashamed. Ryuzaki frowns. Even with your eyes shut you can see his concerned face displayed clearly in your mind's eye and only then do you realise that you’re a little bit in love with Ryuzaki. And you really fucking shouldn’t be. This only makes you cry harder. You feel his hand hover, and then gently settle on your upper back. When you make no move to shove it off, the other hand and both his arms join the occasion as Ryuzaki leans over and hugs you. He shows no sign of moving until you’ve stopped sobbing and your breathing is calming down. 

‘...so it’s something to do with me specifically?’ He asks. You choke out a wet laugh, for a world renowned genius detective, sometimes he is an idiot. ‘I wasn’t joking.’ He says. That’s not what you were laughing about, ‘This is a serious vulnerability. We can’t move forwards as a team if this is how you’re going to react every time our lives are threatened. I’m sorry.’ Ryuzaki’s tone sounds final. You scrub your hands across your wet face and finally dare to look at him.

‘It’s not- I’m not…’ You can’t bring yourself to say it so instead you say, ‘I wouldn’t be like this if it were anyone else Kira Two was asking to basically commit suicide on live telly. I- maybe you’re right. Maybe I shouldn’t-’ 

‘I was right.’

‘Yeah that’s what I’m saying-’

‘You do want to have sex with me.’ What? Ryuzaki’s got his thumb in his mouth as he speaks. His eyes are sparkling, head tilted down, staring you in the face as he says, ‘And presumably more considering how emotional you’re being over my maybe death.’ 

‘I-What?’ You say. Practically breathe out with how panicked and confused you feel. 

‘You want to have sex with me. I knew my hypothesis wasn’t wrong. I’m never wrong.’ Ryuzaki’s smiling like a cute puppy again and you’re so confused. It feels like the world has tipped on its head. 

When you don’t speak Ryuzaki says, ‘I’m not going to die, Bambi. At least, not if I can help it; with the probability of this being a second Kira, I think we will be able to call them off by making our own fake Kira video. The only obstacle will be making sure that the real Kira doesn’t interfere and let the second know that we too are a fake.’ He’s staring at you, face expectant, like he thinks this information is going to make you anything other than angry. You cannot believe what you just heard. Ryuzaki knew he wasn’t going to die all this time? Then why did he- you think back to what he said before and a white hot rage rushes across your body. 

‘Did you seriously make me think you were going to die just because you wanted to be right?’ Your voice is a thundering rage and you’re sure you’re shaking. The tears are back at the edge of your eyes and Ryuzaki has the gall to look surprised. 

‘No.’ He says. ‘Well, yes.’ He amends. The look on your face must be pretty scary because Ryuzaki puts his hands up in front of him and quickly continues, ‘I did it with good reason. I had to ascertain if I was reading you correctly. I tried to broach you on this topic before but you went bright red, and it looked like you were about to cry and I couldn't decipher what emotion that was and so I kept going, in order to find out, but then you lied about it and left. 

‘And I admit, I was rather confused and upset by your reaction because you had already promised me you wouldn’t lie and then you did. I didn’t think you were embarrassed, Bambi. I thought I’d read you wrong and that you didn’t like me. Matsuda had to explain that you were upset. Then the Chief Yagami informed me that what I did could be considered workplace harassment so I thought that was why you made that face- because you were angry. That put me in quite a funk, I have to say, thinking that you were mad at me. 

‘I was planning on calling you to apologise for my egregious overstepping, but then Matsuda informed me that you were embarrassed for, and I quote, ‘having your dirty laundry aired like that’. And I figured it would only make sense for him to say that if it was true and you did want to have sex with me, but those two pieces of evidence are contradictory and I couldn’t reconcile them. So I didn’t want to bring it up until I was sure. I didn't want to embarrass you again, or make you angry or come anywhere close to harassing you. …I admit it wasn’t very gentlemanly of me to use your heightened emotional state against you but it seemed very unlikely another opportunity like this would arise. You play your cards very close to your chest, bambi.’

You’re flabbergasted. All of this for what? Annoyance prickles at your skin and you have to breathe slowly and deliberately to stop yourself from slipping back into white hot rage. ‘Pray tell me why exactly you wanted to know if I want to have sex with you?’

‘Well I think that’s pretty obvious, don’t you?’

You raise an eyebrow, as if to say, “no?”

‘Maybe you won’t be a good detective.’ Ryuzaki mumbles it around his thumb, towards the floor, but you hear it loud and clear. You feel the strong undercurrent of anger about to sweep you away again but it’s completely undercut when he looks directly at you and finishes it up with, ‘I want to have sex with you.’ Your ears start ringing. Surely you misheard that. 

He continues, ‘I have done since the first time I laid eyes on you in the lobby and you looked so much like a startled deer that I nicknamed you Bambi… I was already suspicious of your attraction to me then. But then the case started to pick up and you treated me like everyone else. I’m glad you’re more comfortable around me now, because it allowed us to connect on a level I haven’t with anyone before, but I have to say…’ Ryuzaki’s eyes drift off to the side slightly, and you think maybe he’s daydreaming as he says, ‘I do miss teasing you and watching you scamper around like a frightened deer, always in a state of panic, it’s so cute. But then you just… stopped.’ He frowns slightly, but the expression quickly clears. ‘That is until you started zoning out while staring at me. And blushing bright red when I brought your attention back to Earth. That was fun.’ Ryuzaki’s mouth turns up at the edges, the start of a wicked grin in the making. He reaches out and brushes his thumb over your lower lip and you’re frozen, transfixed. But then he drops his hand like he’s been burned. 

‘For what it’s worth, I am sorry.’ Ryuzaki looks away from you. You think maybe he struggles with eye contact when the conversation’s uncomfortable for him. ‘For tricking you.’ He looks up, ‘but I had to be sure. I didn’t want to repeat last time and have you end up hating me. You’re important to me, as a friend or as more. I won’t trick you again.’ You may not like it, but in some twisted way you do understand his reasoning. You sigh and put your head in your hands. ‘Bambi?’ 

You look up at him from below your brow, with your palms pressed to your face . You point a singular finger at him. ’I am so incredibly angry at you.’

Ryuzaki starts to nod, looking down, when you grab him by the collar of his shirt aggressively and drag him forwards into a kiss. His lips are chapped, dry but soft. And the friction of it catching on your lips feels good. You shudder as a tingle runs down your spine at the feeling. Ryuzaki makes a surprised sound low in his throat and you groan at it as you kiss him harder, before pulling back slightly. 

Your lips brush against his and your noses bump lightly as you press your forehead to his, breathing hard. He says, ‘Am I forgiven?’ You pull back, cup his face and look him in the eyes before saying, ‘No.’ lightly. You brush his fringe out his face and press a soft kiss to his forehead. ‘Let’s go have sex.’ You say, before linking your fingers through his and leading him through to his bedroom. He stumbles a bit when he gets up, clearly not expecting this, and  some sadistic part of you feels slightly vindicated at the motion.

Ryuzaki’s bed is unmade, and the dirty clothing littering his floor makes you feel better about the state he saw your house in earlier. Internally you question how many of the same shirt-jeans combo this man owns. You giggle slightly at the thought, hushing Ryuzaki when he makes a questioning face at you. This morning feels like an eternity away now, so much has happened since then. This, pulling Ryuzaki round to kiss him breathlessly, feeling his hands settle on your hips and then directing him backwards to land on the bed is the only thing you want to focus on right now. You push the other thoughts from your mind and clamber on top of him. 

You settle squarely over Ryuzaki’s hips. You can feel the bump in his jeans where the zipper is; he’s not hard yet but you can’t wait to feel him underneath you. The thought makes you wiggle your hips in anticipation. The flannel pyjama pants you’re wearing provide no padding between you. You can feel the rough material of his jeans through the flannel. 

You use your hands to ruck up Ryuzaki’s shirt, exposing his pale stomach and brown nipples. He’s so pretty. His tits are, in fact, soft. Nipples puffy where they sit on soft pillows of fat covering his pecs. You want to suck them. You brush your hands over them before leaning over and licking one into your mouth while rubbing his soft stomach. Ryuzaki chokes on a gasp and one hand comes up to sit on the hair at the back of your head. Either he’s sensitive here, or no one’s sucked his nipples before. Equally tantalising thoughts.

‘What happened to the timid deer I’ve gotten to know during all these months?’ He asks you.

You lean up slightly to look at Ryuzaki, his hair is wild on the pillow behind him, and there’s two spots of bright pink high on his cheeks but he seems otherwise unaffected, ‘I’ve got a wicked streak’, you say, with a shrug and a sly smile before diving back down to run your tongue over his nipple. It’s pebbled in reaction to the combination of your wet spit and the cold air, so you graze it with your teeth before taking it into your mouth and sucking. Ryuzaki’s hips twitch upwards at this so you do it again. 

You brush your fingers over his other nipple and then switch to it, you run your tongue over his areola, then press your tongue flat against it and suck. You hear Ryuzaki whine from above you. You can feel him pressing his chest up into you, pushing his soft tits against your face. You press him down into the mattress with your hands on his rib cage. He thrusts his hips against you in response and you can feel his dick start to chub in his trousers. You run your tongue over his nipple once more before biting it gently. Ryuzaki whines at this, his hips rocking underneath you. You’ve never heard anything so addicting. 

Your clit is sitting heavy in your pants, and you can feel your pussy clenching in anticipation. You sit your weight on Ryuzaki’s hips so he can rut against you but the denim of jeans is too thick; you can’t feel him how you want to so you reach down and lift your hips to undo his trousers. Ryuzaki hisses slightly when you pull the zipper down. You shove his trousers down enough to free his cock; Ryuzaki helps you by lifting his hips and he’s not wearing any underwear. Does he never wear underwear? Or are you just lucky? He wasn’t that time in the shower… You sit back up to look at him properly. 

Ryuzaki is panting slightly beneath you, mouth a bitten red, nipples shiny with spit and raised, arms lying limply above his head, his cock is lying against his stomach, half chubbed with interest. It must have hurt pressed bare against the zipper of his jeans. You curl your hand around it firmly and give it a couple slow strokes. His hips jerk up into the motion, and his cock starts to fill quickly. 

Ryuzaki’s cock is pretty. It looks good moving through your palm. He’s got an average length with a sizable girth that makes you clench in anticipation just looking at it. It’s fitting for him. Thick and uncut, tanner than the rest of him with thick black hair surrounding the base. His skin takes on a dusky tone where his crotch meets his thigh and you want to lick it so you do. You lean down and slot your tongue into the crease, Ryuzaki’s hips hump up towards the heat of your mouth. 

You set a slow rhythm on his cock with your hand and his hips start to rock into it. His eyes flutter shut, biting his lip and relaxing into the feeling. Ryuzaki looks so fucking sexy like this your cunt is burning an insistent slow lick of arousal. He’s gorgeous, both his face and his cock. You never once thought you’d get to see this. You lean forwards and lick the head of his cock, before pressing a sucking kiss to the tip of it. You hear him groan out, ‘Bambi…’ You watch the muscles around his hips and lower abdomen contract, and he sounds strained. A large hand laces its way through the hair at the base of your head. You expect it to press you closer to his cock but he pulls you up and away from it. You stare at him, shocked, with your mouth open and tongue sticking out slightly.

Ryuzaki sits up, he’s panting and there’s a flush running down his neck to his chest that you want to trace with your tongue. You’re not sure why he stopped you but you feel like a scruffed kitten so you whine at him, forgetting you can use words. Ryuzaki’s eyes flutter at the sound and he pulls you into him to presse a soft kiss to your lips, then your forehead and then your temple before resting his head against yours. You lean forwards slightly, trying to kiss him again or to return to his twitching cock, but Ryuzaki holds you tight. It’s sitting against his thigh, angry and red looking and you’re not sure why you’ve been stopped. 

You pull towards it again and Ryuzaki tightens his grip on your hair and stops you in place. You whine again and Ryuzaki says, ‘you can suck my cock next time, okay Bambi?’ You shiver at how plainly he says it; even though you’d been engaged in the act a mere second ago, the openness he speaks with stirs something deep within you. Your hips hump against nothing. You need him to touch you and you need him to touch you now.

Ryuzaki moves back from your face to look you in the eyes, gaze intense as he says, ‘I’ve got things I want to do to you. Things I’ve been thinking about since the first time I laid eyes on you.’ You swallow reflexively. His eyes track the movement. A smile starts to curl at the edges of his mouth. A shiver runs down your spine at his expression, eyes wide and dark, tracking your every twitch. You’ve often wondered what it’d be like to have the full weight of Ryuzaki’s attention on you, and now you’re got it, it's overwhelming. You feel like you’re going to melt under his watchful gaze. He asks, ‘will you stay still for me, Bambi?’ You nod shakily and he disentangles his hand from your hair ever so gently, kisses you on the temple before moving wriggling out from underneath you to remove his jeans the rest of the way.

You laugh, a hand comes up to cover your mouth and Ryuzaki raises a brow pointedly. You drop it back into your lap and give him a remorseful look. He smiles at you sweetly before crawling back up the bed and patting you on the head. It should be demeaning, but you just wiggle slightly in excitement, happy to be doing good for him. Ryuzaki’s hands brush down your sides, bump your wrists up above your head as he peels the shirt off of you. He says, ‘ready?’ And you’re about to ask, ‘ready for what?’ When he uses the same trick as before, he pulls you forwards by the elbow, catches your hip and pushes on it to turn you around. You land with an ‘oomph’ where he was previously laid. 

You’re still reeling over how fast your positions switched when Ryuzaki’s grinning face looms over you. He leans down to kiss you but you’re still a little shocked so you don’t reciprocate. Ryuzaki sits back a little and asks, ‘too much?’ You nod and laugh a little breathlessly, ‘yeah just, maybe a warning next time?’

Ryuzaki says, ‘I did give you a warning,’ and you raise your eyebrows as if to say, ‘really?’ 

He says, ‘I’ll give you more of one next time,’ and leans in. He stops an inch away from your face, eyes flicking between your eyes and mouth in silent question. You close the gap and kiss him softly. He pulls back with his classic puppy dog smile on his face. Ryuzaki flops down onto his belly between your legs and places a wet kiss just above your belly button. You lean up into it, then recoil immediately when he blows a raspberry on the skin there. It tickles.

‘Hey!’ You push Ryuzaki’s head away instinctively and he gives you a goofy looking grin as he looks up. 

‘What?’ He rests his head on your stomach. He’s ridiculous. God you adore this man; he’s so cute. You can’t stop the smile that’s creeping onto your face.

‘Is this what you were planning on doing to me?’ You rub your toes up Ryuzaki’s side and he shifts away from the motion, grabbing that leg by the ankle and pulling it straight. He pouts at you exaggeratedly. 

‘Is that what you think of me?’  Ryuzaki scrapes his teeth against your belly lightly and hooks his fingers in the waist of your pyjama bottoms, ‘Up.’ He instructs. You lift your hips and he slides the trouser off of you. You feel the fabric on your crotch peel off the skin in a wet sticky kiss. Ryuzaki sits up to pull them off your ankles, and with him kneeling upright between your legs you can’t help but  be in awe of how beautiful he is; all pale skin and long limbs, his messy black hair curling around the edges of his face, how soft the lines of his features are, sloping gently into each other with finesse and ease, the sharp contrast between his black hair and pale skin, the dark circles under his eyes throwing his face into sharp relief against the light and making them stand out. He’s stunning. And you are so, so incredibly lucky.

You sit up on your elbows. Ryuzaki inhales visibly when he sees your cunt for the first time, sticky and wet for him. You watch his pupils dilate and his chest stutter and expand. He leans forward and swipes his thumb down the sticky line of your pussy, parting your lips with a smooth motion, stopping when his thumb comes to rest over your entrance. He can feel the clenching motion your pussy makes at the pressure as it tries to swallow his thumb, eager for stimulation. He doesn’t take his eyes off you as he takes back his hand and settles on his elbows before you. You watch him settle then resettle from your vantage point leaning up on your elbows, seemingly unable to get comfortable. He reaches down and re-adjusts his cock between himself and the bedspread, then he drops his forehead to the crease of your thigh, breath ghosting over your pussy as you see his hips rock into his grip and he moans, mouth open. 

It’s an unbearable tease, the wet heat of his mouth so close to where you need it and your hips rock up towards him. You feel his breath puff against your cunt in staccato bursts as he laughs so you ask, ‘What?’ Well, more whine it. Ryuzaki settles his head to the side and brings his hands up to rest on your hips. 

He looks up at you, brows pinched and you can feel your clit twitch at the pained expression on his face as he mutters, ‘You’re going to be the death of me,’ before dipping his head to lay a wet kiss briefly over the top of your clit. He groans as it jumps towards his face and you squeal in response, rocking your hips away from and then into the sensation. It sends a sharp shock through you and then burns with the ghost of the sensation once his lips leave. You whine, feeling more desperate by the second as your hips chase the sensation where his mouth once was. Ryuzaki is staring at your pussy with an intensity he usually reserves for interesting cases or sweets so you start to squirm in place, unable to keep your hips still. 

‘...Please?’ You say, and tilt your hips up deliberately, pleadingly. Ryuzaki parts your swollen lips with his thumb, running it down the seam of your cunt before leaning in and swiping his tongue up the length of you. He curls it around your clit at the top and then repeats the motion, once, twice, a third time. You throw your head back and try not to squirm too much, rock your hips back and forth against his face while moaning in the back of your throat, little ‘uh, uh, uh’s that you don’t care to quieten. His tongue is so wet and hot. It feels good. 

You feel Ryuzaki’s fingers brush against your folds, then you feel two of them rub gently over your entrance, not pushing in, just providing a pressure and a friction that makes you cant your hips down into the motion. You moan, high pitched, as he rubs little circles there while making out messily with your clit. 

‘Ryu-’ 

He pulls back for just long enough to breathe out, ‘Call me L,’ before resealing his mouth around your clit. You giggle at first before realising he’s serious when he locks eyes with you, previously having had them shut while enjoying his meal. 

‘Ryuzaki, what?’ You ask breathlessly. Ryuzaki, or L you suppose, grazes his teeth over the hood of your clit in response, before humming noncommittally and sealing his lips around it to suck hard. You moan hoarsely, thighs coming up to clamp around his face. He taps the palm of his free hand repeatedly against the top of your thigh and with some conscious effort you relax them away from his face. He detaches from your clit with a wet pop and between licks says,

‘Call, me, L.’ Oh. So he was serious then. Honestly, you don't care what he wants to be called right now as long as he puts his mouth back where it was. ‘Do you want my fingers inside?’ L presses in slightly with the fingers circling your entrance, rubs them back and forth teasingly. You keen, bear down with your hips.

‘Yes Please, L. Please can you- can you put your mouth back on me- on my- please just- oh fuck L.’ 

You moan hoarsely as he puts his mouth back on your clit, brushing his tongue up and down before swirling it and sucking while his two fingers slowly breach you. You try to hump down onto them and he stops about an inch in. You whine, lifting your head to look at him but he’s got his eyes closed. You take in a deliberate lungful of air and slow the rocking of your hips back to its regular gentle wave. Ryuzaki- L groans out his approval into your pussy and his fingers start to move forwards again.

The stretch is delicious. His fingers are much longer than yours and reach deeper than you can on your own. The friction feels like a trail of fire is being stroked deep in your cunt. L starts curling his fingers up against the inside of your pussy, while returning to a suckling motion on your clit with his mouth, his tongue pressed against the bottom of your clit. The rhythmic pushing and pull between L stroking hot fire deep inside you and bathing your clit in rolling waves of pleasure shunts you towards the edge far faster than you expected and you can feel your cunt clench in anticipation, feel it spasm around the pressure building behind his fingers and your clit. 

Your breath’s spilling out in gasps and moans, airy little ‘ah, ah, ah's' that L responds to by pulling his head away from your clit slightly without letting go of the suction. He keeps the same rhythm with his fingers, drawing lines of fire inside you that spark up your spine and make you jolt in his grasp. You manage to get out, ‘Ryuzaki-L I’m- I’m gonna-’ before you cum against his face. Body scrunching up around his head, your thighs come together and you let out a hoarse moan as you convulse. Your cunt grips his fingers in a vise grip and white hot pleasure spreads through your body in a tingling wave.

Distantly, you can hear yourself moaning but you’re too caught up in it to care about how loud you’re being. L licks and sucks his way though your orgasm and as the pleasure starts to fade into oversensitive little shockwaves that make you shake and twitch away from the pressure of his hot wet mouth you notice the mattress is shaking. In rhythmic, shuddering motions the bed frame squeaks and you realise that at some point during your orgasm L has started humping the bed. 

‘L- L come up-, come up here.’ You’re breathless in the aftermath of your orgasm, flopping your hand towards yourself, jelly-like, as you gesture for L to climb up the bed towards you. L pets a hand through your wet pubic hair like it's a cat as he sits up onto all fours. His cock is an angry red, bobbing beneath him as he licks his lips. He crawls up your body and flops on top of you. His cock bumps against the hot sticky flesh of your cunt and you jerk away, the stimulation being too much too soon. He readjusts it with one of his hands so it sits in the crease of your thigh instead. You giggle, feeling a little delirious off your orgasm. 

L’s face swims into your vision; his usual wide-eyed stare is shuttered slightly with want, eyelids lowered yet still fixing you with the full intensity of his curiosity. He’s smiling like a puppy again, the look on his face being a mix of incredibly satisfied and deeply hungry. The whole lower half of his face is wet, and it strings up one of his cheeks and is clumping the edge of his eyelashes together. You say, ‘you’ve got a little something…’ And reach up to wipe the cum off his face. He grabs your wrist when you pull your hand back and sucks your thumb into his mouth, before bringing your hand back to his face. L uses your hand to wipe some of the wetness off around his mouth, then he sucks the cum off your fingers before bringing your hand back to his face and leaving it there. You take the hint and start wiping the rest of your slick off his face to feed it to him slowly. L smiles happily the whole time, nuzzling into your grip and chasing your fingers with his tongue when you pull them back; you can feel arousal starting to buzz behind your clit again, squirming your hips where you’re laid. 

L leans over and kisses you. The movement of his lips against yours is heavy, laced with need and his hips make shuddering little humping movements against the crease of your thigh. ‘L,’ You breathe. 

‘Bambi,’ He replies. You colour at the nickname, flush with heat because even though you just came on his face L still has the ability to make you nervous. Twitchy with want and need. Your hips tilt up into the pressure of his own as your clit twitches alongside your anticipation. He brushes his nose against yours sweetly and your heart melts slightly. Your cunt clenches in a want-need-give kind of way- you want him in you. You just have to open your mouth and tell him. ‘L- can- will- do you want- ?’ You try get the sentence out but your throat has swallowed your tongue and you don’t know how to get it back. You can feel the flush in your face spread, burning along to your ears and down your neck as you stutter, embarrassed.

‘Yes Bambi? What is it?’ L noses his way along your face, practically breathes the words into your ear with a low hum but you know the question is anything other than genuine. If he was actually curious he’d be looking at you. This man knows exactly what you want; he’s just enjoying watching you squirm. You know this because as soon as you opened your stuttering mouth, L had brushed his hand over your stomach and petted gently over the top of your clit, feeling it twitch in interest and your hips hitch up into the motion. 

‘L,’ You draw out the syllable into a whine, rock your hips up to try entice him into fucking you without having to say it. L leans up on his elbows to watch your face, traces an invisible pattern over the curve of your cheeks and around your eyes, brushes his thumb over your mouth. ‘What is it, Bambi? What do you want?’ 

‘Please?’ You try. His breath ghosts over your face as he lays a gentle kiss against your forehead. You whine, high in the back of your throat in protest.

‘What? Is that not what you wanted?’ L sounds entirely sincere when he says it, enough so that you’d be tempted to believe him if it wasn’t for the way he’s started rubbing his cock in a burning hot line across the fat of your cunt. Shifting his hips in a slow rotation over the wetness steadily leaking from your drooling pussy and dragging it up in a hot burn over your clit. 

You gasp wetly, rock your hips into L’s with a shudder and then cry out when he rudely leans back, pulls his cock away from your pussy with a grunt and sits up. You’re left reaching out for him, arms feeling empty now he’s no longer in them, hips rocking into nothing, tears pricking at your eyes from being denied again when you had him so close to you. L wraps a hand around his shiny wet cock, pulls his foreskin over the head of it in a slow, curling stroke. 

‘You have to tell me what you want, Bambi. Otherwise how am I supposed to know? I’m not a mindreader after all.’ 

‘You know what I want!’ You’ve never felt more small than you do right now, close to throwing a tantrum you feel desperate. Desperate to please him, desperate to be filled, desperate enough to choke out, ‘L, please… Fuck me I need it.’ In a whiny voice while fighting back tears.

‘Well done, Bambi.’ L says. He speaks in the same monotone as usual but the words wash over you warmly anyway, you know him well enough by now to know L wouldn’t give the praise if he didn’t mean it. Almost as if to prove that point L crawls back over you and presses a gentle kiss to your forehead. You sniffle back your tears and curl into the heat of his body lying over you. You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him as close as you can. 

L presses a kiss against the side of your temple, braces one arm by the side of your head and then reaches down to line himself up with the other. You shudder as you feel the hot head of his cock bump your entrance. The heat of it rubs a long line up and then down your cunt. You whine and cant your hips up into him pleadingly. He huffs out a hot breath, you feel it flutter your hair. L’s face tilts away from yours, preoccupied watching his cock rub over your clit. You turn your head to the side and kiss his elbow.

You can see the muscles in L’s arm working to keep him upright above you, see his tendons straining in the tense of his fist. His wiry build and athleticism never fails to surprise you even though you know he has to practise some kind of martial art from how easily he’s been tossing you around. 

You hear L groan and his hips stutter as you feel the hot heavy pressure of his cock press against your entrance again, this time with purpose. Your pussy clenches in anticipation and your hips squirm forwards to meet him. Press yourself as close as possible, bear down with your hips where L’s lining up to meet you. The head of his cock catches and you feel your pussy pulse and try suck him in as the hot heat of his cock breaches you. The stretch is tantalising, delicious. The head of his cock head rubs over something hot and electric, back and forth just inside you as L’s hips rock slightly and you hear him moan, low in his throat above you. 

You rub your nose against the sweaty crease of his arm before turning to look for his face. L looks divine above you, wide eyes narrowed with pleasure, forehead pinched and red mouth hanging open. His cock slides deeper within you and he pants heavy against your temple. You can feel the walls of your cunt stretch open, splitting around the thick line of his cock. L pulls out slightly and then rocks back in, fucking your cunt open with slow gentle grinds of his cock. The drag of it inside you burns deliciously, you rock your hips into the motion.

You whine, wrap an arm around L’s neck and tug to pull him in for a kiss and L collapses onto you with a grunt. The force of it sheaths the rest of his cock in your cunt in one swift motion and you throw your head back with a hoarse cry. L’s long body blankets yours, his shoulder is pressed up against your chin, arms bracketing your head, you can hear him panting roughly above your head. You’re so full. You feel like you’re going to break in the best possible way. L’s cock is a searing stretch of heat and thickness inside of you. You can’t stop squirming underneath him. Every press of his naked, sweaty body along the length of yours is electric. 

L pants into your neck as he rocks his hips imperceptibly against yours. Little pulsing grinds. You hear him whine, feel it vibrate through his throat, high pitched as he forces his hips to a stop, trying to give you some time to adjust to the stretch of his cock. You crane your head back and press your lips against his jaw, you’re so close you could count his eyelashes, his eyes are screwed shut tight. He’s so cute. 

You can only imagine what this feels like for him. Your cunt contracts hotly at the thought and you clench down on Ryuzaki’s cock unintentionally. He chokes. His hips make an aborted thrust against you, pressing his hips into you as firmly as he can, pushing your pussy to its limits and stretching you impossibly further. You can feel his cock grinding against your cervix. It feels so good. You moan, gasp his name and toss your head back.

L puffs out hot breaths against the top of your head, biceps flexing. He tries to pick himself back up off of you as tremors travel up his spine. You reach round his shoulders to pet at the back of his head, before combing your hands through the sweaty hair on the nap of his neck.  L chokes out, ‘sorry,’ and lays a messy, open mouthed kiss against your temple. ‘Can I-‘ He groans and his lips slide wetly down your cheek; you think he’s drooling a little. ‘Can I move please?’

You thread your hand through hair at the back of L’s head and pull him up, the skin of his chest sticks slightly as it peels away from yours. His moan sounds like it’s punched out of his chest when you breathe out the word ‘yes’ against his lips. You pull your legs back up over his hips so they settle in the air behind the small of his back. The shift in position pulls your cunt tighter around L’s cock and you feel him rasp a groan against your lips as you whine at the feeling. Your clit twitches with electricity at the sound. His cock is so hot and heavy inside you, the stretch is delicious. Your hips rock subtly to grind his cock in against the deepest part of you; you need L to move and you need him to move now.

L’s fingers scramble for grasp over your shoulders and his grip tightens on you as he starts to rock his hips back and forth. The movement’s subtle, more of a pulsing grind than a thrust.  You can feel your heartbeat in your clit, it thrumbs steadily and pulses in time with each inward press of his hips. L rests his forehead against yours, his breath ghosting over your face. You whine loudly, feeling the head of his cock grind against the deepest part of you repeatedly. The hot heavy weight of his cock stretches you out and you can feel your pussy flutter and swallow rhythmically around the solid feel of him. But you want more, you need more. You pant out, ‘L, L, fuck me.’ 

You feel rather than hear L groan and then he stops moving entirely. He presses his lips against yours shortly and you whine into his mouth, circle your hips to try entice him into moving. L moans, breath catching on your cheek and chest convulsing against yours before you feel him suck in air and lift his upper half off of you. You have to focus to hear what he’s muttering over your disappointed whine, ‘…considerably more vulgar.’ L’s hand strokes your sweaty hair back from your face and says, ‘I do think we’re going to enjoy our time together.’ He punctuates his sentence by pulling his hips back an inch and thrusting back in sharply.

You choke, as your head snaps back and you inhale sharply on a whine. Your legs bounce helplessly in the air behind his back and you feel your heels click just once before he stops moving again, returning to grinding his hips against yours in a circle. This movement only serves to frustrate you, rather than satisfy now that you’ve felt him move. L’s eyes are locked on your flushed face and you can’t help but think he’s only doing this to see what reactions you’ll give. As if you yourself are another experiment, something for him to toy with at ease and see what kind of response he can elicit from you. 

You whine pleadingly and push back into L’s slow grinding, ‘L please, c’mon-

L leans down, whispers in your ear, ‘What? Fuck you?’ His breath is hot against your ear, ‘My cock is currently buried in your cunt. I am, by definition, fucking you..’ He’s being purposely obtuse. You know he is. Just as you think you’re gonna lose your mind with the way he’s teasing you, L presses his hips against you harder, before pulling out and pushing back in. His cock is a red hot heat inside you, you can feel it twitching as he moves, burning against something gooey deep inside you. Your pussy feels like it’s melting around him when he moves and you moan roughly; you need that feeling more than you need to breathe currently.

L chuckles breathlessly against your ear before leaning back, bracing himself over you on his arms as he starts to fuck you in short pulses. ‘Is this not enough?’ You whine and shake your head. Your face flushes and your eyes slip shut as the sensation overtakes you, it feels good.

‘What is it? Do you need more, Bambi? Does your greedy cunt want more of my cock?’ Fuck, L’s filthy. Your head is spinning with the switch-up from his usual dry wit to this. L pulls out of you almost fully, leaving just the tip of his cock inside, rubbing it back and forth teasingly. Your cunt spasms around him, desperately trying to suck him back in, ‘Answer me, Bambi. I have to know. Do you want- no, do you need more of my cock?’ 

‘L, I- please. I do, you know  I do. Please. Give it to me.’ You rush out in one long whine, embarrassed but desperate enough to beg. You open your bleary eyes and he’s watching you with such a serious expression you flinch from it. L brushes a hand over your cheek and you realise you’re crying as he wipes away your tears. L raises his hand to his face and licks the tear off his hand. He reaches down and presses that same thumb to your clit, rubbing in slow circles as he starts to fuck his cock back into your cunt with short thrusts. 

L’s staring down at you the whole time, analysing your facial expressions and you think maybe he was waiting for this, for you to look at him, for you to cry. Your cunt clenches and spasms around L’s cock and you see a smile flicker around the edges of his mouth.  A shiver wraps itself around your spine and squeezes; it tingles out across your skin as the reality of L’s sadistic tendencies translating over into the bedroom hits you like a truck. He’s toying with you, and he’s enjoying every second of it.

You feel your clit twitch at the realisation and the loss of sensation, spark with electricity as L leans his arm back up beside your head and thrusts hard, lands his hips against your ass with a bruising sting, and turns your insides into melting goo with his cock. Your breath stutters out of your lungs in a desperate gasp. Your head tips back, L’s lips brush down your exposed neck and a shudder runs through you. You moan hoarsely, hips humping back against his thrusts. L bites down on your neck, sucks a bruise over the sharp marks left by his teeth. The pain laces through you in a quick thrill before licking around the edges of all the parts of you that feel good. You can’t keep your eyes open; the world is blurring with the pleasure licking up your spine.

You tip your head back down, feel the world squeeze into nothing more than L and his solid weight above you, the melting point of your insides wrapping around his cock, broiling with pleasure and you need him to kiss you right now. You search for his lip’s blindly. Your lips brush wetly across his cheek and L turns his head, licks into your mouth with fervour, his tongue brushing your own and the roof of your mouth. You feel like he’s sucking the air out your lungs, consuming you.  

L’s hips are moving fluidly against your own now, elbows braced near your head, your feet bouncing helplessly in the air behind him as he thrusts. You grip his forearm with one hand, desperate for something to ground you as the pleasure threatens to sweep you away with it; L catches your hand with his own, links your fingers near your head. His cock feels like a searing line splitting you open. Like you might crack around it and dissolve into nothing but open nerve endings sparking with fire. Every thrust knocks the breath out your throat. The tip of his cock kisses you so sweetly deep inside. You kiss him back as best you can, messy, open mouthed and panting. 

L fucks you sharply with shallow thrusts, and then slows down to deep, slow strokes before switching back. He’s alternating between rutting the head of his cock against your g-spot with pressure and brushing languidly over some deep part of your cunt that makes your hips twitch and your whole pussy feel like it’s on fire. 

You moan with every thrust, little ‘uh, uh, uh,’’s as his hips meet yours. You suck L’s tongue into your mouth, his cock twitches deep inside you as you do, a moan bubbling up over his lips, spilling out from behind his teeth. His hips start to speed up, and you feel his whole body shudder as he struggles to slow them down again. You can’t stop squirming underneath him, hips humping back into his thrusts, gasping moans wetly against his lips, his every touch on your skin is electric. L pulls away from your mouth as you struggle to kiss him, and instead presses heavy, open mouthed kisses over your face. 

You can feel the wet mess between you, squelching where you’re connected at the hips,  your slick spilling out your drooling cunt around the thickness of his cock, his cock fucking it back in with an electric friction that runs up your spine and builds knots in your stomach, the friction between your pubic hair catching his, his stomach brushing over yours. Everytime your chest rubs against L’s, your breath catches on your moans, hiccuping slightly; you can hear him inhale sharply through his nose when your nipples brush. All of these sensations are building a broiling pressure behind your clit, tied to the intense line of burning fire his cock has turned your pussy into. 

L rubs his spare hand roughly down your side and slides it between you, lands the tips of his long fingers against your clit. His hips stutter as he readjusts his rhythm to accommodate the new movement of his hand, fingers spelling messy circles against the top of your pussy and your clit. The movement of his fingers burn as your clit twitches desperately into the sensation, burning a hot heartbeat against the fingers. You need to come. It’s just barely in your grasp, sparkling around the edge of your vision as you stutter, ‘L- L, please I need-,’ You cut yourself off with a whine.

L’s panting hot against the side of your head and he groans as you manage to choke out, ‘hard-er, please, harder.’ His hips snap into yours with double the force, and you slide up the bed some before his hand disentangles from yours and clutches you around the shoulder, pulls you back towards him and keeping you there. 

Your hips meet his heavily from the motion and you squeak in surprise between your moans, hands flailing until they settle on his shoulders. You hear L gasp out a shuddering laugh breathily above you. He’s groaning low in his throat as his hips piston against yours firmly. He reaches down between you again and his middle finger strokes lightly over the fat, wet tip of your twitching clit , you whine high pitched. Your heartbeat thunders behind your clit as it starts to pulse and clench to the staccato rhythm of your orgasm. Your hips rock haphazardly into the sensation as your legs start to tremble. 

You can hear L’s moans punch out of his chest as your pussy clenches tight on his cock and you feel wet pleasure radiate up your spine. You struggle to keep your eyes open as sparks of pleasure blur your vision. Your pussy pulses hotly around L’s cock, spasming rhythmically, milking him. You can feel L’s cock twitch inside you as his chest collapses against you. He’s so heavy for someone so lean, you feel trapped under the weight of him, it sends your head spinning to think about, makes your cunt spasm as you lie there and take it. You’re unable to do anything else, L’s pinning you to the bed by your shoulders as his hips piston into you aggressively, drawing out the end of your orgasm. 

You gasp and scrape your hands along his upper back, whole body rigid, back bowed off the bed as your hips spasm against his. L moans roughly against your ear and his hips stutter and pumps his cock into you harshly. Your breath catches in your throat, arms instinctively pushing against his chest where you’re pinned as you struggle and fail to squirm weakly out from underneath him. You feel your body spasm as liquid heat creeps up your spine and you feel something hot and wet release from your cunt in short pulses as you struggle to breathe. Did you just?- the thought barely registers as L swears gutterally, ‘fuck,’ and pulls you as close to him as you can get, slides your sticky hot body against his, one arm wrapping around your shoulders and the other around your head. 

He’s completely on top of you now; your face is buried in his chest, nearly pressed into his hairy armpit as you mewl pathetically, choke around your own breath and try crawl away from the hot press of his cock. It feels too good, you can’t keep your eyes open, vision blurring as fat tears spill out of them and down your cheeks. The head of his cock rubs over and over a spot deep inside of you that makes your toes curl and your thighs shake. 

You shout hoarsely as you’re tipped into another orgasm way too soon, your clit pulsing with near-painful shocks as you cum, shaking underneath L. The pleasurable waves are pain tipped as it ripples through you an electric pulse. Your mouth is caught open, lips ruby red and spit slicked rubbing against his chest as you drool around a long moan. Something rough brushes your face and you taste salt on your tongue. 

L freezes above you, draws his hips back and then ruts forward, once, twice, three times, hard. His hips press tight against yours, rutting hard against you without pulling out, cock buried as deep in you as he can get as it twitches and you feel a hot liquid release inside you as he cums. L’s hips press hard against you one last time, thrust out just barely before slamming back in, then rock back and forth shallowly, groaning as he rides out his orgasm, you can feel it rumble through his chest above you. 

You’re hiccuping around gasps, chest convulsing as L’s body loses tension above you. He levers himself off of you, arms shaking with the exertion, chest peeling back as L stares at you and a sob rattles free from your chest. Your hand comes up to cover your mouth, embarrassed, but L just leans down and presses a soft kiss to your forehead and brushes your sweat soaked hair back from your face. ‘Are you doing okay? Can I pull out?’ You nod, tuck your head down to hide your face as you feel his cock slide gently out of you and the flood of his cum that rushes out after. 

L flops off of you, to the side and tugs you gently with him. The room feels far too open without L on top of you, you feel panic tug at your mind and settle against your neck but then the room shifts and you land haphazardly tucked against L as he leans your head against his chest with a loose arm. Your breathing starts to even out as you reconnect with L but you’re still crying. You feel his arm raise to pet lazily at your head and your harsh and heavy breaths slow in time to the rhythm of his chest rising and falling slowly against yours. ‘You okay, Bambi?’ He asks. You nod against his chest, tears still slipping down your face. 

‘Need you.’ You mumble out. You try shunting yourself up the bed further, try to wriggle desperately your way into his space but your legs aren’t really cooperating. L leans into your clumsy touches, wraps his arms around you and pulls your wet sticky body to settle over his own. Tucks your head into his neck and allows your legs to settle between his own. ‘You sure? It wasn’t too much was it?’ L asks, brushing a thumb over your wet cheeks and you shake your head, relax into his hold and sigh contentedly at being there. 

‘Was a lot. But it was good. Liked it.’ You mumble against his neck and you feel him nod against the top of your head, press a kiss against your hair after. L holds you against him, and you stay there content to just float until your eyes start to slide shut under the threat of sleep.

L’s hand rubs against your hip, you hum gently, too sleepy to really reply when you feel his hand slip down between your legs and swipe at the mess between them. ‘L!’ Your eyes snap open in shock. Your voice comes out in a feeble whisper-shout, voice hoarse from all the noise you made earlier. L draws his hand back sharply, looking for all intents like a chastised kid doing something he shouldn’t. You see him suck his fingers into his mouth as he says, ‘sorry’, without looking apologetic at all. 

He glances down between your abused cunt and your face a couple times before he says, ‘I won’t be just a minute,’ and tipping you off of him. He doesn’t go far, just leans down to swipe his tongue through the mess between your legs. You shriek ‘L!’ jerk away from the sensation and reach down to grab him by his hair. 

You try pull him up but he just moans low in his throat. His head pops up for a second as rests his chin on your pubic hair. L says, ‘I’ll be fast I swear,’ before leaning back down to clean up your pussy with his tongue. You can’t stop twitching, hips bucking incrementally against his face as you whine high pitched, ‘L, c’mon, fuck, stop. ‘S too much.’  L swipes his tongue against you one last time before chasing where his cum has leaked down across your thighs and ass. ‘L!’ You say sharply, put your hand against his face and try push him away that way.

‘Alright, alright.’ L sits back up between your legs, props his elbows up on your knees. His hair is sitting even wilder than usual, all mussed up at the back with long strands both sticking to his face and straight out from his head. He’s got this goofy looking grin on his face, a wide smile that you’ve never seen him make before. The most gleeful expression he’s worn in all your months of working with him having been the one he makes after teasing you. L sits back on his haunches and smacks his lips together before wiping his fingers around the edge of his mouth, sucking any residue off of them. You giggle breathlessly. He’s so weird and you cannot believe you like him so much. ‘Hey, L. You should come back up here.’ You pet the bed beside you and he says,

‘You should call me Ryuzaki now.’ before crawling up the bed. He sits about a foot away from you and you're about to be offended before he reaches over, grabs you underneath an armpit and a knee and uses sheer force to drag you in between his legs. You’re spluttering indignantly when he drops you on him, rolls you slightly to face him, chest pressed against his pubis, arms on either side of his soft stomach. 

You raise yourself up and slap him gently on the belly, ‘Don’t just drag me. What the fuck- Ryuzaki!’ 

Ryuzaki looks pointedly at you and then over to where you were sitting, ‘You were in the wet spot.’ He shrugs before placing his hands under your arms again. He sighs, longsuffering, ‘but if you want to stay there… I could always…’ You wiggle and squeal away from his grip, not missing the mischief in his voice that signalled he was seriously about to pick you up and drop you back into your combined mess of bodily fluids. 

‘Okay! Okay! I surrender.’ L removes his hands from your armpits.

‘...does that mean I can eat your pussy again?’ He asks, and you feel before you see him starting to loom over you with a sparkle in his eyes. You feel your clit twitch with a sharp zing at his expression and it's just painful enough that you cringe and shake your head ‘no’ as fast as you can. Ryuzaki huffs and leans back petulantly, but he starts drawing patterns on your shoulder blades with his finger tips so you imagine he can’t be too upset. 

You lean your head back against his stomach. ‘...So, why Ryuzaki now? And L before?’

You feel Ryuzaki shrug as he says simply, ‘detective kink.’ He leans back across the bed to reach for a little cake out of several sweet treats he has littering his bedside table.

You slap his bent leg beside you and say, ‘you do not!’ 

‘Owww…’ Ryuzaki sounds petulant again even though his mouth is full. ‘Stop hitting me.’ He says. He’s rubbing the part of his leg you slapped with his free hand. Oh, so he is actually upset. You didn’t expect that. You say, ‘Oh. Sorry.’ And lean over to press an apologetic kiss to the area. ‘I’ll stop, don’t worry.’ You lean up on one arm to look him in the eyes. ‘But seriously. Why Ryuzaki now and L before?’ L  puts half the cake down, leans down and presses his lips against yours in a soft kiss. 

‘I told you. Detective kink.’ You can tell from the gleam in his eyes he’s fucking with you. And that you’re not gonna get a clearer answer out of him anytime soon. Possibly just because he’s an ass but possibly because of Kira. You narrow your eyes and him and huff frustratedly into his belly. You feel his stomach move, and hear him laugh somewhere above you, and you think that maybe all the stress is worth it if you get to have this. You’re hiding your smile against Ryuzaki’s tummy when you feel him start to stroke his fingers through your hair. 

‘...Hey Ryuzaki?’

‘Mmm?’ He hums softly in response.

‘I really like you, y’know.’ L’s hands pause in running through your hair briefly before they start moving again.

‘I really like you too.’ He sounds softer than usual, ‘Although I can’t say it’s been good for our investigation, on a personal note, I have to say I am really rather pleased with how things have turned out.’

You snarfle a laugh into his hip, ‘Well I can’t say you’re wrong there. But… hopefully I’ll be less distracted now.’

You hear him laugh in response above you, ‘That or you’ll be more distracted. Safe to say I’ll be more distracted…’ He trails off and you can near hear the cogs in his head turning, ‘Maybe this was a bad idea. What if neither of us can focus on the investigation now?’ Ryuzaki doesn’t sound panicked, more like he’s mulling the idea over in his mind. ‘Hmm, we might need to work in separate rooms from now on.’ He sounds serious and you huff out a laugh in response.

‘I doubt it’ll come to that Ryuzaki. I promise I can keep it in my pants long enough for us to get some work done, or, at least I’ll be able to now that we’re doing this in our down time... Wait, we are going to keep doing this, right? I don’t think I can stop after just once.’ You snap your head up to look at him, panicked, and are startled to be caught in the overwhelming sincerity of his gaze. 

L brushes his hand softly across your forehead before settling to hold your face softly. 

He says, ‘You have absolutely no idea just how tantalising I find you, do you? I’m not worried about you ‘keeping it in your pants’. You’ve shown profound restraint so far.’ He brushes his thumb over your bottom lip, gaze drawn to it, ‘Just once?’ His eyes flick back up to meet yours and you shudder at the look in them as he says, ‘We’ve got the rest of the night to fill after you’ve recovered, and if I was any less dedicated to bringing Kira to justice I would ring each of our coworkers individually to tell them to take tomorrow off.’ He leans down to press a gentle kiss to your temple, ‘‘Just once.’’ Ryuzaki snorts a laugh through his nose and then leans forward to kiss you gently. 

‘Rest up.’ He says.’ He twists around again and takes the rest of the cake he had been eating and holds it up to your lips. You take the offered morsel.  He guides your head to lay back down on him, ‘We’ve got a full night ahead of us.’ A shiver works its way up your spine before you sigh and close your eyes, resolving to get at least a little rest before things start to work up again. Because if you can trust Ryuzaki with anything, it’s that he follows through with his plans.