#not covid ones specifically
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today i was buying a lipgloss for my mom and when i was leaving the store the dude said to me hey there will be a prize draw (sorteio) this weekend do ya wanna take part
and i said yes without even asking what it was for since im brasilian and i love free shit
and I truly want to win whatever that is, since he asked me to write down my number and name in a piece of paper of the back of a notebook, and I could see there were some other missing parts of the page there already
#conclusion: se for de graça até vacina na testa#btw i miss taking shots#vaccine shots#not covid ones specifically#but just like... i like taking them idk why lmaoksjsks#but yeah#personal
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On average, what is the total MONTHLY amount that you spend on dining out*?
*(This doesn't only count going out to restaurants, but also stuff like picking up fast food to bring home, getting a coffee on the way to work, getting a premade sandwich from a grocery store deli during lunch, buying a quick snack from a convenience store or food cart whilst walking somewhere, ordering a pizza or any other food to be delivered to your home, etc.)
*(If you often dine out in groups/as a household: calculate and divide the costs so that you get a Per Person average. This is for YOU individually, NOT the total household/group costs)
(I'm sure polls similar to this have been made before (very common topic), I just haven't personally seen one that I can remember, so, I was curious to do my own! I was discussing this with a group of people today and it was very interesting to see how widely the number varied between individuals. :0c )
(Reblog for bigger sample size if you can, and feel free to explain your answer in tags if there's anything extra to add!)
#polls#tumblr polls#I'm mostly in the 0/1 - 25$ category. Maybe the rare month is a bit over $25 if there's something specific going on like birthday.#Which I'm NEVER eating in an actual restaurant (erm... covid... plus I just hate restaurant environments. i would rather pickup#the food and bring it home to a peaceful quiet environment that I control lol). But more typically like stopping by a grocery store deli#section or something. I don't have coffee that much. And I can't eat fast food much due to my health issues/diet restriction stuff#so if I'm out like coming back from an appointment and I start feeling really sick and weak. I know that a hamburger will just#blow up my system and cause nausea or something. So I try to pick the breadiest most#neutral looking turkey sandwich at the safeway deli to eat during the hour ride home or whatever lol#I actually kind of wish I could do stuff like get food more often vecause it would take the burden of cooking everything off of me#but.. alas... Money... and Health Things... T o T#I still wouldn't do it ALL the time but like... once a week instead of once a month or something.. or maybe turning into a coffee#person.. I do love drinks A LOT .. i am a drink person who will have 5 different drinks sipping on at all times#But i just have to make them all myself mostly lol#And I cant really have too much coffee since it will make me sick. so like.. teas and juice mostly#When I inevitably become a millionaire by never using social media never networking and only finishing one#sculpture every 5 months which I dont even post about or sell - then I shall... get more drinks..#I will somehow wean my body onto coffee and drink one a day solely for the ritual of it#Though even then... I would still probably just like.. buy the mateirals to make it at home or something#Like if you had a million dollars you could just buy a kitchen grade ice cream machine and other stuff to make your own milkshakes and#coffees and smoothies and bubble teas. Genuinely I think even if I were a BILLIONAIRE I would still look at playing likr $8 for a single#coffee and go .. uh.... I could just buy the equipment to make this and then save that money. PLUS. its in my house now so no need to#have to leave. I can make my own drinks in the comfort of home. .. ideal..#Like no matter how rich I ever got I would still have the lingering scroogey stinginess. like i am NOT paying for that. I will jus#make it myself. Especially if it was an Everyday thing. Anythign thats part of my routine I try to optimize and make as efficient as#possible... ANYWAY.. In an IDEAL world I would get treats. but probably not that much. as on a daily basis it would start to get#to me and I would just save up to buy kitchen machinery if I was rich lol
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:)
#post targeted to take out one specific mutual like a sniper shot#was giggling to myself as i drew this. covid be upon ye#my art#ultrakill#gabv1el#gabriel ultrakill#v1 ultrakill#suggestive#nsft#gabriel should be on his knees begging. it’s his natural habitat#drew this bitch ass robot from memory which is probably not a good sign for my mental health
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#us politics#global politics#i truly feel the global south has suffered ENOUGH#and YET#we still have to deal with one specific country’s own politics apart from our own#idk if americans truly realize how much of our headspace is taken up by the us’ activities because it directly impacts our own#it’s not the fault of YOU an American specifically#but i also truly honest to god hate this situation#it’s endless suffering#for third worlders in particular#i wish we could just ignore the US and not be affected at all#the same way the us is NEVER affected by our domestic politics#if it is it’s minor#but when the us sneezes everyone gets fucking Covid#this is the reality#/end rant
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Evan 'Buck' Buckley: Life So Far
So, I used my 9-1-1 timeline to make a timeline of Buck's life so far!
Please know that I may be a month or two out in some situations - I had to make some assumptions here and there and the 9-1-1 timeline is also just.. interesting at times (lmao). If you have any questions feel free to ask!
(Also sorry if I missed anything/made any mistakes, I tried to include everything and have checked it over many times but I know that as soon as I post it, I’m bound to notice something I did wrong rip)
#i was thinking of also making a buddie specific one with all of their key moments#this show's timeline is my enemy at some points#like wdym buck and abby knew each other for 2 months and then buck waited for her for EIGHT MONTHS??#and how season 3 ended in may 2020 but then season 4 made the march 2020 covid lockdown canon??#like it's just so?????#evan buckley#911 abc#911#evan buckley timeline#911 timeline
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woke up three hours ago and all I've done is roll around in bed thinking about the Roman Empire
#or. roman emperors. specifically those two#I've had COVID and it didn't give me half as much brain damage as this one film did#God how am I even supposed to go on#I WISH I WAS KIDDING but I'm so incapacitated. What else even matters#booked tickets for th fancypants super high tech theatre to see it again.#now I just wish I'd gotten the tickets for today and not Monday#because how the fuck can I survive until Monday#hello. send help#I CANNOT UNDERSTAND how this even HAPPENED#saw it on Friday then Saturday/Sunday didn't think about it at all#on Monday evening I started having mild symptoms of brain rot#on Tuesday I woke up and it was all over for me#every living second afterwards has just been HOOOO. OHHHH. OOOAAAHHH#gladiator 2#gladiator
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There's this vid going around of this tiktoker calling this town in AB "a very welcoming place" when it's incredibly racist
#the rez next to it was supposed to get its own hospital but that predominantly white town convinced the gov to put it THERE instead#under the reasoning that more people lived in the town (which is bullshit btw. the reserve is probably in the top 10 most populated#reserves in Canada)#the town also has several Chinese restaurants that were kept afloat through Covid quarantine#specifically because of ndns still ordering food there because the White people stopped eating there bc the owners are Asian.#and they blamed Asians for Covid.#**ordering TAKEOUT I should specify. no one was allowed to eat inside & you had to pick up your food by the door for social distance
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i know this is very specific to me being a therapist but god I wish the stages of grief weren’t written into the album storyline this way 😭😭 it’s not her fault people think they’re sequential of course but just thinking about how things get perpetuated in media and the massive influence she has (“in my ___ era” is just… so normal now?) and I can already see the five stages becoming some sort of meme… miss swift I don’t need my job to be any harder
#also… TikTok is the bane of my existence because teenagers are already so delayed due to Covid#like working with 15 year olds makes me feel like I’m working with 12 year olds#and add TikTok to that…#especially TikTok mental health…#NO ONE GET MAD this is just so unfortunate#even kubler-ross regretted calling them stages#because the whole point is they arent linear#anyway. this is very specific I know#lmao it’s also worse because I hate the way she talks about therapy 🙃
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one thing about wearing a mask is occasionally people who don't mask but kinda feel bad about it will make some comment about how you're being smart about it and they WOULD wear a mask but you see they just don't have one on them! oh darn and shucks well next time maybe. and then you can say "i have extras, do you want one?" and you get to watch the gears turn as they figure out how to say no without having to actually admit the reason they aren't wearing one is because they just don't feel like it. because they were expecting you to like absolve their personal guilt about not masking and therefore do not expect even for a second that you will instead ask them to confront it.
they Never take an extra mask.
#good idea generator#dont care abt ppl not masking around me btw i think fighting abt ppe is a losing battle#and largely it is governmental failure that got us here. like imagine if we had robust standards for ventilation as a result of covid#but i call this out specifically bc antimaskers never behave like this#its exclusively ppl who agree with masks generally but just dont wanna wear them#which like. fine its your life. but can u not like defend urself to be about it using excuses we both know are fake#can u just own that you think its uncomfortable or whatever#and if you really Would wear one..... well i have extras. do you want one? lol#i do this bc i cant make anyone wear a mask but i can make it a deeply uncomfortable topic to bring up#you sit with your own decisions and you WILL reckon with the fact that you decided to do that. on purpose
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Does anyone else automatically size themselves up with people their age and look for ways that you’re inferior to them? Just me? Ok….
#the reasons why I think like this are…complicated#honestly a lot to do with the#adhd struggle bus#surprise surprise the neurodevelopmental condition has overarching and very specific effects on my life and how I interact with the world#of course disclaimer that this weird thing I have is not inherent to adhd#but maybe is a way of thinking I developed in part due to it#this is a me thing if anyone else relates to this fine but you don’t have to#I think thi oversharing series is a way for me to microdose journaling#I try to get into journaling but I have way too many thoughts#it’s all or nothing either I write nothing or I spend 3 hours documenting everything thought I had that week#I think a lot of this has to do with my persistent issues with time management#and I’ve tried to hide this struggle in a lot of ways because ngl it’s embarrassing#to the point where I held myself back from doing certain things I wanted to do because ‘hmm could you handle it though you’re already#struggling to manage in school with the bare minimum. maybe you just suck’#and this is probably because I went to a college prep school so yeah#there were 14 year olds taking multivariable calculus and people with various talents#to say that I was intimidated would be an understatement. it’s strange because while in middle school my self esteem was decent it dropped#in high school like how stock prices dropped in the beginning of Covid#even though I was like an ok kid I somehow convinced myself that I was dumb and inept#all because I struggled with one area in my life#honestly I’m not sure if I can paint a clear picture of this time. for one#memories are complex. but I do remember feeling that way and needing a lot of support to be hyped up#fuck#I’m now remembering how my aunt used to be that person. she was my cheerleader growing up and practically raised me in childhood#she passed away from cancer right when I turned 15#shit I’m crying now#during this time in my life I needed a lot of reassurance since I took any small failure as a sign from the universe that I was indeed inept#it was her and my middle school friend who used to rant to me about dragon ball and pewdiepie that hyped me up#my parents were a mixed bag. unfortunately they too sorta overreacted to things like getting a B in math. they used to make me feel like#uchiha-gaeshi overshares
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whyyy does the vaccine feel worse than when I actually had Covid back in Septemberrrr
#kind of wondering if I caught a different strain than this one targets?#my vaccination symptoms match up with the symptoms friends experienced when they got Covid over the summer#I’m so mad that CVS’s search is ‘mRNA or Novavax’ now and not more specific#the clown behavior of Moderna trying to jack up the price when it’s the option that has the worst side effects…
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Arsenic with these tbh... 👀
Having normal thoughts that normal people have
#i think i hauve covid#i need to draw something for this but im about to go to class so it'll unfortunately have to wait.......#ask#biocrafthero#arsenic#for later#now im picturing that as like. his assigned preferred weapon#because i keep talking about knives but as ive said before hes more of a 'blunt violence' typa guy#this would be perfect........#dont look at me im thinking of mutant and omen yomi hustle .#i main mutant because it looks sick and it has Pounce. i love Pounce. mutant also has visible claws#and my friend specifically sent me omen because they thought 'hey thats a nick-like mod character there'#mutant has claws and omen has acid... i think is so mutant-coded...#close-range combat with claws.......#...sorry this wasnt supposed to turn into a rant about the turn-based fighting game#anyway i think it fits him. very much.#and it would also be very practical for- say- removing one's eye from its socket#mmmmmmm...
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I don't know entirely how to explain this, but I think an important part of healing from religious trauma is learning about substance use disorders and shifting your views on drugs to neutral
#I'm not gonna act like I'm exempt from biases#I still get nervous drinking or being around people that are drunk#I still get paranoid using my medical marijuana#but I genuinely think viewing drugs as neutral is the first step (no pun intended) to recovering#The flavor of christianity I was raised with focused on joy. You were supposed to say you're joyful no matter what because ur alive#Anger. Sadness. Grief. Disgust. All of these were brought into the world when Adam and Eve fell from grace#Sex. Drugs. and Rock and Roll are seen as the epitome of hedonism and self-serving pleasure#Sex and Rock and Roll are talked about p often. Maybe not R&R specifically but the concept of secular music#We talk about purity culture and indoctrination and isolation and so on and so forth. But drugs are different. Drugs are Still Bad#When I say shift drugs to neutral sure I mean having a beer with the boys or smoking a lil pot to relax#but I also mean people doing heroin and cocaine and fentanyl and narcotics and opioids and#Drugs are a substance that alters your body or mind in some way. That's it. That's all there is to it. It's not good or bad it just is#They can cause harm. I know that. But so can literally anything#I'm learning about substance use disorder as part of my clinical psychology track but I was already a harm reduction activist before that#It's uncomfortable seeing the way people. even people in a psychopathology class. talk about addiction. it's not a disorder to them#it's a moral failure. A weak will. A slip up. A mistake that ruined their life and not a substance a person used to alter their situation#To help you get comfortable feeling joy again after leaving xtianity you have to view substances as neutral. You can't see your own pleasure#as a neutral one where you're simply changing your situation if it feels like things are good and bad. And if drugs aren't good or bad#then maybe you aren't either. maybe you just are#idk if that made sense I just got my flu and covid shot and I'm slightly feverish but yea. drugs! I like weed it's good be safe#ex christian#religious trauma
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anyone else violently afraid of dying in a mass preventable accident or is it just me. asking for a friend.
#emyrs.txt#i'm so maddddddddd. i wrangled this specific type of intrusive thought as a preteen!!!!! i had finally managed to convince myself#that i was fine with “if it happens it happens”!!!!! i had finally gone. ok well. nothing i can do about that! and moved on!!!!!#but then. covid vine boom. multiple acquaintances and family dying within months of each other vine boom. season 4 house md finale vine boo#the election vine boom. me being stressed as hell in general because of who i am as a person. etc etc.#was driving down the freeway the other day and so viscerally thought of a car accident happening that i almost started crying reflexively.#caitlin doughty uploaded a new video today and i watched it thinking. oh yeah i'll feel better! bc it's caitlin :) and then i almost had#a panic attack imagining something like that happening to one of my friends or family or me.#anyway i think i should get checked for ocd. for reasons unrelated to the intense stress/sheer panic i feel all the time & the rituals &#compulsions & the thoughts that loop over & over in my head. unrelated to all that.#also this specific fear is i think rooted mostly in pain. like. dying a slow nasty death. where being killed would be more humane.#and also obviously the preventability of it all. thinking specifically of caitlins' newest video specifically but also just. accidents#happen all the fucking time. being a casualty in something and then having my body not be identified for hours or days or months. or being#misidentified. like obviously i won't give a shit. bc i'll be dead. but who will help my parents through the whole thing. who will tell#my friends.#ok i'm freaking myself out even more. ask to tag. idk if any of this is triggering.#um. bye. i'm fine just. ?????????? you understand.
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one thing about me is i have no idea what i know because i have no idea what is like a normal amount of knowledge about anything
#its literally not even that im insecure. i just dont know what people are as a general rule going to know#and specifically its always that i think i dont know something and it turns out i have a significantly larger amount of knowledge about it#ari opinion hour#literally one time my friend asked me abt community bands / how to find one to play with and i no joke genuinely started off my answer like#So disclaimer i dont actually know that much about community ensembles or have really much experience with them at all#and then proceeded to go on a nice long tangent complete with how to find them‚ types of ensembles to look for‚ what organizations might#run community ensembles or keep lists of them‚ and then provided this friend with at least TWO DIFFERENT LISTS where they could#find ensembles to check out#and then i stopped and realized id written a Whole Thing which in turn made me realize#that‚ Actually‚ I Have Like EIGHT YEARS Of Experience Playing In Community Ensembles. So What The Fuck Was I Talking About#particularly because i first started doing that in 5th grade meaning i have literally been playing in community ensembles for one (1) fewer#year than i have been playing my instrument. because the 8 years was counting by semester and doesnt include covid years#(at this point its 18 semesters / 11 years)
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is it just me or did everyone who went to high school/college between the late 00s and early 2010s drive or have at least one friend who drove a used car with a tape deck and no way to plug in an iphone/mp3 except one of those tape to headphone jack converters. like the fake tapes that you’d plug into your headphone jack.
#or those bluetooth fm transmitters that were shit where the audio would cut out or other random audio would cut in like every 2-3 minutes#the ones that plugged into the cigarette lighter#my first car was a 2002 sebring convertible. it was a nightmare death trap with 273827382 problems which were a constant source of stress.#but sometimes i miss her and her bad but nostalgic tape quality stereo#and her loud ass heavy bass vroom vroom engine. but most of all her uncanny ability to take stupidly fast and sharp turns for some reason.#my 2014 altima couldn’t even IMAGINE#anyway it turns out combining covid brain with edibles and antidepressants does something to a person. why am i even thinking about this.#there is something bizarre and nostalgic about defunct technological relics from your lifetime#that are reflective of very specific points in time. idk.
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