#normal plain sliced bread not so much

[strangedisciple]

assumption do you really like bread . plain bread

ummmmm i like tiger bread. if there is tiger bread available in the house i do just eat that plain. tbh

[laurfilijames]

Breathe

Part 7

Pairing: Will 'Ironhead' Miller x female reader

Words: 6.9k

Warnings: Rated E, 18+. Swearing. Trauma/PTSD/nightmares/insomnia. Unprotected intercourse.

Summary: Unanswered questions amp up every emotion that time does nothing to lessen, and so much uncertainty raises the concern if everything will turn out okay or if moving on is the only answer.

A/N: Less hurt than the last chapter, I promise! Thank you to everyone who was so enthusiastic and responsive to it and made all that angst worth writing!

Photo by @avatarskingdom and edited by me. Please do not use without permission or credit. Headers by the wonderful @spaghettificationandpretzels!

Chapter Playlist

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

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You felt numb as much as you felt angry, scared and heartbroken.

It was all still so surreal, having to remind yourself constantly that Will broke up with you and was gone, the persistent sick feeling in your stomach growing with every thought of his life being at risk and that even though he was no longer yours, you might never see him again.

You did everything you could to understand his side of things, but with that your frustration increased wildly, the fact that he hadn't even given you the chance to be there for him stinging almost as much as him abandoning what you knew, or thought, you had.

Did he really believe you wouldn’t support him, that you didn’t care enough about him to give him space and time while he dealt with all the things he needed to, that your love for him simply wasn’t enough for him to want to hold onto while he was deployed, that everything you thought you had been building was broken and false?

The toaster popped, shooting your slice of bread out, making you jump after forgetting you were even waiting for it.

You ate because you had to, but food tasted bleak and flavourless, and everything that landed in your stomach felt like it sat there and made your nausea even worse.

You had made a whole lasagna earlier just because, giving you something to do for the better part of an hour, but the thought of eating it was so unappealing and you had the idea that maybe you would drop it off for Benny. Taking a bite out of the plain piece of toast, you thought how awful it might feel to go over to the Miller’s house right now, and decided against it, opting to freeze the lasagna for another time instead.

Another bite and the toast was in the trash, and you stood in the middle of your kitchen unmoving, not sure what to do with yourself next.

You hadn’t slept, and whether it was fatigue or just your grief pummeling you, you broke down and sobbed, your body shaking as the memory of Will holding you in his arms in this very spot flooded you, dancing one night while in the middle of cleaning up dinner, pausing almost anything in favour of stealing a piece of each other.

Work was a welcomed distraction, forcing you to go through the motions and function like everything was normal, able to allow you to bury your emotions for the course of a shift and nearly forget about what had happened, only to have it all come back the moment you got in your car and started your drive home, knowing you had nothing to look forward to.

You hadn’t been back to the gym since the day you saw both brothers there all beat up from their brawl with each other, your body too exhausted and weak to even consider working out, but as you sat at your kitchen table with nothing else to do, you went and changed into your gym clothes and drove over.

It was busy enough, observing the evening crowd enough to keep you entertained as you walked on the Stair Master, each step automatic and absent-minded.

Through a few people and machines you spotted Benny, resting on a bench between sets of chest presses, his smile and slightly awkward wave making you feel equally so, and as he stood and started weaving his way over to you, you felt bad that he probably felt obligated to talk to you.

You stopped the machine and stepped down, grabbing your things in the assumption you would probably feel like leaving after this conversation, your water bottle shaking in your hand that trembled with nerves and adrenaline.

“Hey,” Benny said, somewhat hesitantly.

“Hey, Benny,” you answered, smoothing your hand over your sweaty hair.

“How’re you doing?”

You sighed, looking down at the floor as you shook your head. “Do you want the fake answer or the honest one?”

Benny huffed a laugh in understanding. “You look like shit.”

You laughed out of disbelief, bringing yourself to look at him as he scratched his head and tried to recover.

“I mean- fuck.”

“No, I look like shit. Feel like it too,” you confirmed, reassuring his observations.

“Are you looking after yourself?” he asked, his face full of concern.

You shrugged, “As much as I can, I guess.”

He nodded, sympathetic to your feelings. “Are you eating? Sleeping?”

“Here and there. Not much of both if I’m honest.”

“Yeah, I get it. Just do your best even though it’s hard.”

You hummed. “Does it get any easier?”

He tilted his head a bit. “Does what get easier?”

“The worry, the waiting…”

“Oh, uh…” he pulled his ball cap up off his head, smoothed his hair back and placed it back on again, this time backwards. “Yeah, I guess we all just get used to it in a way. But I’d be lying if I said that everyday you’re half expecting to get that phone call…”

He saw the tears in your eyes well to the surface, and unlike most times, Benny felt a bit speechless.

“I can’t stop thinking about him,” you admitted, your words not even directed at Benny, but rather said aloud simply because you couldn’t keep them in.

“Ugh, I’m sorry,” you went on, wiping your eyes and shaking your head like it would suddenly shake away your feelings. “I’m gonna get going, see you later.”

“Yeah, of course,” Benny responded, his voice soft. “Hey,” he called after you, making you pause and turn half-way to face him.

“Just don’t give up on him yet.”

You gave a weak smile. “I couldn’t if I wanted to.”

You made it to your car before you really fell apart, the tears coming down your face so hot and fast you could barely see to unlock the door, and when you flopped down into the seat, you rested your head against the steering wheel and wept.

The most overwhelming sense of panic came over you, taking control over everything and trapping you in it, your mind racing with every horrible thought imaginable, and before you could realize, your breathing had turned short and gasping, your mouth desperately trying to suck in air between sobs.

Your hands wrapped around yourself, squeezing you tighter than the grip of the anxiety attack was, feeling your whole body shaking and trembling and all you wanted to do was scream.

That was when Will’s soothing voice popped in your head, urging you to focus on your breaths and count each one, the sound of the numbers in his even tone allowing you to stop the panic, and you began counting out loud until your breathing eventually leveled out.

How could the same person who was the reason you were feeling this way manage to help calm you, you thought, exhaling slowly as everything around you started to come into focus again.

You ran your hands over your face, your body still shaking with each inhalation though they had become more regular, knowing that as much as you were hurt and betrayed, you still loved Will more than you could imagine loving anything.

Benny’s phone rang not thirty seconds after he’d just hung up, Will’s number lighting up his screen suspiciously close to him ending his conversation with Tom.

He pressed the green button to answer it, and before he could even get out a ‘hey’, Will’s voice stopped him.

“Are you checking up on me?”

“Uhh-”

“I heard Redfly talking to you, idiot.”

Benny scratched his head, trying to gauge which way this was about to go.

“If you’re wondering how I am, just ask me, Ben.”

“Yeah, well, sometimes that’s easier said than done,” he quipped, recalling how many forced conversations they’d had lately where Will gave short, vague answers to everything.

“What the fuck does that mean?”

Benny sighed, lifting his arm up in exasperation before letting it fall and hit his side, “I dunno, man, I just thought I’d get a truthful answer out of Redfly over you. He’s with you every day and can tell how you are.”

He heard Will sigh, and Benny took the pause as a chance to give his brother the opportunity to tell him for himself.

“So, how are you, then?”

Will sighed heavily again. “I don’t fucking know anymore. Okay, I guess?” he said, his uncertainty clear.

“Tom said things are going well with the op, and despite it all you seem like you’ve got your head in the game.”

“Yeah, that’s all fine,” Will explained, like his role as a Captain on this tour was the least of his worries. “It’s everything else…”

“Yeah…” Benny agreed, holding space for Will to continue.

“How’s she doing? Have you seen her?”

“Saw her at the gym yesterday,” Benny said carefully, trying to decide if it would be better or worse to tell him she wasn’t doing well, but ultimately knowing if he wanted Will to be honest, he would have to be too. “She’s not doing good, man.”

Will was silent, making Benny pull the phone away from his ear to check if the call had dropped or not.

“I can’t believe I did this to her,” he said quietly.

“Yeah, well,” Benny said flatly, “What’s done is done, now you just have to focus on finishing this job and getting back home so you can fix it.”

“Do you think there will be anything left to fix?”

Benny blew the air out of his mouth slowly. “That’s up to you two. If you both want it to work out…”

“That’s what I’m worried about. By the time I get back she’ll have moved on and learned to hate me.”

“You don’t know that,” Benny countered. Able to tell the expression that would be on Will’s face right now, he continued. “She still loves you man.”

“I wish she didn’t. She deserves better, not this shit…”

Benny’s heart ached for his brother, hating that he was going through this on top of being back in action, praying his stress didn’t get the better of him or be the cause of any fatal mistakes.

“Listen, man, I gotta go,” Will spoke, his voice weak and quiet.

“Yeah, okay. Be careful out there.”

“Always.”

The beep of the call ending sounded in Benny’s ear before there was even the chance to consider saying anything else, and he hoped Will would hang onto the thought that maybe it wasn’t all lost yet.

Days turned into weeks, but the amount of time that was passing didn’t help to make things feel any better, making you wonder every day if it would ever stop hurting.

Anger grew as you wracked your brain combing through every detail of every conversation and act that could've led to this, wondering where it was that you went wrong, but you still couldn’t pinpoint the moment Will gave up on loving you or what it was that made him peel away. It almost hurt just as much as him being gone did, unable to know what the cause was so you could try to rectify it and simply get closure as to why it ended, your heart like an open wound that would never heal.

You looked at yourself in the mirror one last time before exiting your room, on your way to meet two of your girlfriends for a quiet drink, your attempts to refuse unaccepted.

You couldn’t deny that it would possibly help get your mind off of Will, but you knew it was futile as everything you did and everywhere you went, he was there.

“That guy can’t stop looking over here at you,” Grace said through a grin as she nudged you with her elbow, and you twisted in your chair slightly to follow her gaze.

You took a sip of your wine as you assessed the man with dark brown hair and brown eyes staring directly at you, his smile bright and clean, his lips plump and inviting.

You said nothing as you turned back to your friends, raising your eyebrows as if that was a response that would appease anyone.

“Come on, he’s gorgeous!” Nicole urged, tilting her head indignantly.

“I never said he wasn’t!” you defended, but in your head all you could think was how he wasn’t Will.

“You need a rebound fuck,” Grace suggested, and the thought made your stomach flip.

“I’m not ready for any of that yet,” you admitted, hoping they would understand how raw everything still felt.

“We know,” Nicole sympathized, giving your hand a squeeze as she placed hers overtop, and you knew they would support you in anything whether it was continuing to miss Will with every part of your being or hooking up with the next man who walked by.

“Oh shit, he’s coming over,” Grace blurted, adjusting in her seat as a wide smile appeared on her face.

Your heart plummeted in your gut, and you sighed, praying this wouldn’t be as horribly awkward as you were expecting it to be, trying to find the energy to be kind and cordial despite not wanting to.

“I hope I’m not interrupting,” a deep, smooth voice purred behind you, and you felt the demand of his presence as he stood beside your chair.

His eyes were even more alluring up close, and his crooked smirk was equally charming as it was sexy, the dark scruff around his mouth complimenting his olive complexion.

You swallowed, feeling unable to find words, and with a low chuckle, it prompted him to continue.

“I couldn’t help but want to come over to say hi and introduce myself.” He spoke with such confidence, his voice so seductive. “I’m Cam.”

He held out his hand for you to shake, and you did, feeling your hand tremble slightly before he took it in a firm grip and moved it up and down once on your behalf.

You introduced yourself as well as Nicole and Grace who you wanted to kick under the table for how they were gawking at him, but not as much as you wanted to crawl under it to hide away as he pulled out a chair from the empty table beside yours and took a seat.

“Can I get you ladies another round?”

“Oh, yes please!” the girls chimed, seeming completely enthusiastic about him joining you.

You assessed his hand for any ring as he waved the waitress over, requesting for the same drinks to be brought to the table, feeling relieved there was no band wrapped around his ring finger, but something about him still felt off to you.

He’s not Will, your mind reminded you, and you took a long drink of your wine to try to swallow the sour feeling stirring in your gut.

It was comfortable enough talking to him, even catching yourself laughing at some of the things he said and genuinely having a good time, but every time you felt yourself liking something about him, there was one thing you found you didn’t.

He’s not Will.

You found yourself lost in his chocolate eyes as he spoke to you, imagining instead they were clear blue and held a brightness that reflected the love you had learned to see shine through them, only to be reminded that that wasn’t something that existed for you anymore, and you blinked back to the reality you faced.

“Would it be too forward of me if I asked for your number?” Cam asked, his eyebrows raising on his forehead in a hopeful, but confident expression.

“Hm, yeah, sure,” you replied, picking his phone up from the table that he slid over to you and typed your number into a text message along with your name, sending it to yourself.

“I’ll call you,” he said, standing from his seat where he continued to smile at you.

Your eyes followed him as he walked over to the bar to pay his tab, feeling something stir in you as he looked back over his shoulder at you one last time before he sauntered out of the bar, everything about him charming and gorgeous.

But he wasn’t Will.

“Are you going to go out with him?” Nicole asked excitedly, the looks on both your friend’s faces confusing you like you missed something they hadn’t.

“Umm,” you pondered, trying to wrap your head around the situation, the three glasses of wine making your head feel fuzzy. “I- I don’t know.”

You felt like crying, feeling a sense of guilt and anxiety bubble up in you, like you were betraying Will and being unfaithful despite the reminder that he wasn’t yours slapping you in the face and twisting your heart in your chest.

A few days had passed since your night out with the girls, and as expected, a text from Cam had come through asking to take you for dinner, the invitation sitting ignored and unresponded to in your messages.

Every time you opened your phone to reply, you would see Will’s name a few spots down from Cam’s, the contrast between them and what was past and what was present making you wish more than ever that you could go back in time and try to mend whatever it was that took Will away from you.

You didn't recall ever being so irritable, your temper short and your patience gone, a toss up whether you would scream or cry at the drop of a hat becoming the daily gamble.

The gym didn’t even seem to allay these frustrations, and as you tried to adjust the height of the rack bracket and it got stuck, you felt that blanket of red creeping up through you.

Cursing under your breath, you wiggled the pin again and again, tugging and jostling it to try to get it to move, the clanking of the metal against metal drawing attention over to you by prying, judging eyes.

“Need help?”

You sighed with relief, hearing the familiar voice that belonged to Benny, closing your eyes and counting your breaths as he stepped in and adjusted it for you.

“Thank you,” you muttered, avoiding meeting his eyes as shame washed over you.

“You alright?”

You forced the air out of your lungs again, still not meeting his piercing gaze.

“I'm just so angry and there's nothing I can do about it,” you admitted, your tone defeated.

“I understand that,” Benny drawled, leaning against the squat rack.

You felt him studying you, almost as if he was debating saying something.

“He asks about you every time I talk to him…”

It felt like the wind was knocked right out of you, and somehow you managed to speak.

“He does?”

Your bewilderment seemed to confuse Benny, his face screwed up as he looked at you like it was the most obvious and normal thing.

“Yeah?”

You covered your face with your hands, letting out a growl that did nothing to signify your frustration at the situation.

“I still don’t know what I did wrong. He stopped staying the night and became more and more distant each time I saw him…” You paused briefly, trying to put your thoughts in order. “Then he just stopped altogether and the next time we spoke he ended it, and now you’re saying he asks about me?”

“He didn’t tell you about his nightmare?” Benny asked, his shock blatant.

You shook your head, your brows knitted tightly together. “No?”

Benny sighed and rolled his eyes, shifting on his feet as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Jesus Christ…okay,” he groaned, exasperated by his brother’s ability to consistently make things worse.

You stood there unmoving as Benny explained what had happened, going over all the details Will had told him of his nightmare and his reactions to it, and you felt cold despite having worked up a sweat from what you had done in your routine already.

“I told him he wouldn't actually hurt you but he was so messed up from it. I think it was days before he managed to sleep after that,” Benny said, his tone sad. “I've only seen him that distraught after a nightmare a couple times before.”

“Why wouldn’t he have said anything to me?” you asked, your voice a whisper.

Benny shrugged, “I think he was scared. And then knowing he was leaving on top of it…it was just too much for him.”

You nodded, rubbing your hands on your arms for some sort of comfort, feeling like your heart was breaking all over again, but this time for Will rather than because of him.

“I’m not making excuses for him,” Benny went on, leaning with his arms up on the barbell that hung across the rack. “I don’t agree with what he did, I just know how messy things can get in that head of his, and as his brother I kinda always have to have his back, but it doesn't mean I’m on his side.”

You nodded, at a loss for words as your mind tried to process everything.

It was a helpless feeling, having some sort of understanding now but unable to do anything about it, wondering if you should send Will a message or have Benny pass one along, but all you wanted to tell him was you loved him and that was probably something he didn’t need right now.

“Thanks for telling me,” you said softly, all of your anger replaced with sadness and worry, your heart aching in your chest.

Time continued to pass but did nothing to heal, each day marking another one gone without a word between you and Will, leaving you more unclear than ever at what to do, feeling that if he wanted anything to do with you, he would’ve reached out by now.

Not wanting to put Benny in the middle of it, you never once asked him to interfere or treated him as a messenger, only asking how his brother was doing when he hadn’t told you on his own and thankful that he usually would provide an update anyway knowing you were wondering.

The last time you saw the younger Miller you had dropped off a week’s worth of food, having prepped a variety of high fat and carb meals, helping to get him ready for his upcoming fights in a new weight class.

Cooking for Benny was just the type of distraction you needed, feeling useful and productive and able to put this latent energy into something good for someone else, offering to make his meals for him each week so he didn’t have to worry about his nutrition while focusing on his training.

He had told you as he helped unload all the food from your car that Will was due to return home soon, a matter of days or weeks but there was no exact date yet, and every time you went to the gym or to the grocery store, you braced yourself for a run-in with the man you couldn’t stop thinking about.

You finished washing your face and brushing your teeth, checking your phone one last time before leaving it on your dresser for the night, never getting used to the disappointment you felt at not seeing a sweet message from Will like you used to whenever he wasn’t with you, and still holding hope that whenever it did buzz with a text, it would be Benny saying Will was back.

Your anxiousness was getting the better of you, feeling like it was worsening each day to the point you were struggling to sleep even more than what had now become your normal, never resting for more than a couple of hours at a time if you were lucky.

So many things passed through your mind in those hours spent awake, some of which consisted of that outstanding offer for a date with Cam, not declining it yet despite knowing it was something you didn’t want anything to do with. Nicole and Grace would still bring it up whenever you talked but didn’t put any pressure on you, both of them knowing deep down you were happiest with Will, and you weren’t about to jeopardize any remaining chance with him until you knew for sure that there was an absolute finality to your relationship.

Not feeling tired but knowing you needed to try to sleep, you crawled into bed, nestling yourself under the covers on the side that Will used to occupy, closing your eyes in hopes your mind would drum up the memory of his arms wrapped around you.

You knew you shouldn't do it, knowing it wasn't helping you move on and that some might deem it unhealthy, but every time you laid in bed you imagined him with you and it was becoming the only thing that would get you to sleep.

It had been your haven; the warmth of his body and your limbs tired and wonderfully achy from sex providing all the comfort you needed to drift off, both of you usually able to sleep soundly with the exception of Will having the occasional nightmare until his mind plagued him with the one that he couldn’t get past.

How could it be so wrong to go back to a time when a version of you didn't haunt his dreams, when you had brought each other nothing but love and understanding and a sense of safety and security? You kept replaying what Benny had told you about his nightmare over and over, the sense of guilt you had over it working to torture you just as much as the dream tormented Will.

You sighed, squeezing your eyelids tight, doing everything in your power to recall the feel of his lips on your neck, his breath ghosting over your skin as he wished you goodnight, his beard scratching against you in the most addicting way as he tucked his face as close to yours as he could.

Tears started to spring from your eyes the harder you shut them, thinking how you would give it all up in a heartbeat so Will could be happy and live a life with all of his worries put at ease even if it meant you couldn’t be a part of it.

Will picked at the frayed laces on his boot as he listened to the dial tone, one leg bent to rest on his knee while waiting for Benny to pick up, excited to share the news that he was flying home tomorrow and to get an update on Benny’s training, knowing he had been working hard to put on the last few pounds needed to put him in the Light Heavyweight class.

“Sup, bro?” he finally answered, out of breath.

“Hey, Ben. You running?”

“Just in the middle of some light spars. Got my first fight tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, buddy!” he hollered, his excitement palpable through the phone.

“That’s awesome, Benny,” Will praised, proud of his brother for reaching his goal.

“How’re you doing?” Benny panted.

“I’m okay,” he paused, planting his foot down so both were on the ground and scratching his head. “Coming in tomorrow.”

“Fuck, seriously?”

“Yeah…”

“Shit. The fight is in Fort Myers, I can’t pick you up, man.”

Will tried his best to disguise his disappointment, his leg bouncing as he tried to level his voice.

“It’s fine, I’ll take a cab or get Redfly to drop me off,” he suggested, knowing he wouldn’t even ask his friend since Tom would be so eager to be reunited with his girls.

Benny sighed, “You sure?”

“Yeah, it’s not a big deal. I’m just sorry I’ll miss that fight.”

“There will be more, don’t worry,” he assured. “Safe flight home, eh?”

“Thanks Benny. Good luck tomorrow. Knock ‘em dead.”

Benny chuckled, “Yeah, I will. See you soon, bro.”

Will ended the call and sat for a minute, the bit of excitement he felt about coming home diminished, feeling a sense of dejection that he officially had no one there for him.

He considered all of his options, the thought of reaching out to you even crossing his mind, but knew that he couldn’t and he would just have to settle for whatever warm welcome the cab driver wouldn’t provide him.

He blew air out of his mouth slowly, starting to feel like he couldn't capture a proper breath, closing his eyes as the sense of self-inflicted and well-deserved dread he was now accustomed to consumed him.

One, two, three…he counted, the numbers switching from the sound of his own voice to yours, repeating them with each breath in and out until he secured a consistent pattern.

Tomorrow.

You knew what it meant without any other context, the single word appearing on your screen from Benny making your heart jump into your throat, and you grabbed the edge of the countertop behind you with shaky hands as you leaned against it.

He had promised to tell you when he knew for sure and here it was, the day you had hoped for for so long, but one you were also terrified for.

Will was coming home.

As a slew of emotions ran through you, it dawned on you that his arrival happened to be on the same day as Benny’s fight, and you wondered if that meant anyone would be there to welcome him home.

You picked up your phone to reply to Benny, thinking of asking him who was planning to pick Will up from base, but as soon as you started typing the message, you hit the arrow to delete it, putting your phone back down on the counter.

It wasn’t your business, you told yourself, fighting every urge to make it yours, the thought of Wil returning home from the hells he faced with no one there for him breaking your heart.

You figured you were the last person he would want to see anyway, and knowing you had the potential to send him even more over the edge made you feel sick, thinking of how much had changed from when you were the one who used to bring him peace.

The flight was long, and it felt like every muscle in Will’s body ached as he walked off the plane and waited to board the bus that would bring them to the base station, feeling so close but still so far from being home.

There was continuous chatter around him, the excitement of all the soldiers about reuniting with their loved ones making Will feel happy and sad at the same time, and he did his best to seem enthused when asked if he was looking forward to going home.

He checked his phone more times than he needed to, having sent Benny a text that he had landed to which he responded with a thumbs up emoji, part of him hoping that there would be something from you, only to remember he didn’t deserve any grace for his actions.

He was getting everything he deserved, he thought as he pressed his head back against the headrest after sitting down, sighing out slowly while closing his eyes, finding it amusing that being alone was something he was both looking forward to and completely dreading.

It wasn’t long before the bus arrived at base, and Will remained in his seat until everyone else had gotten off, not wanting his fellow troops who were so eager to hold their loved ones to be held up by him who was only going to wait for a fucking cab.

He slung his bag over his shoulder and made his way through people hugging, a weak smile forming on his lips in seeing one of his friends holding his newborn baby, and not far off did he watch Tom embrace both of his daughter’s in his arms, picking them up and swinging them around until they were screaming with delight.

After making his way to the doors, he pulled out his phone and looked up the number for a taxi, rubbing his other hand over his tired eyes roughly, praying it wouldn’t take long for one to show up.

The area he stood in was quiet with everyone else still lingering behind, but he glanced up when he noticed a couple walking past hand-in-hand, pausing to steal a kiss.

Will was about to hit the number to dial for Taxi Tampa when he looked up again, his eyes landing on a familiar face and one he couldn’t forget even if he tried.

You had just walked in and were stopped in your tracks as you noticed him at the same time, your face a mix of so many emotions that Will could hardly pick one out.

You gave a small shrug and shook your head, silently explaining that you didn’t really know what you were doing there, and Will all but choked as he tried to take a breath, his shock in seeing you completely overwhelming.

He dropped his bag and let his phone fall on top of it, stepping toward you in purposeful strides, his eyes welling up just the same as yours were.

“I wasn’t sure if I should even come but…I had to show up for you,” you shook out, Will’s hands reaching to cup your face, his thumbs smoothing your cheeks as tears started to fall down them.

He nodded in response, unable to say anything, his own tears breaking their threshold as you grabbed onto his forearms, rubbing them through his shirt as he continued to hold onto you.

He pulled you into a hug, relieved when you embraced him just as hard, feeling himself relax into you, his face nuzzling your head.

“I’m sorry,” he cried, alternating his remorse with ‘thank you’ between pressing kisses onto your forehead and hair, your sobs making your body lurch against his.

Your hands pawed at his back, clawing at his fatigues like you were trying to hold onto him for good, and Will prayed with everything he had that you never would let go.

He wasn’t sure how long you stayed like that for, but he eventually felt himself calm down, relishing in holding you and being in your presence again, knowing he would do everything in his power to make every bit of hurt up to you.

Will inhaled deeply, letting it go slowly out of his mouth, feeling like he could finally breathe properly again after all this time.

It was surreal to be in his arms, his warm embrace something you missed more than you imagined you could have, the feel of his body on yours and his scent surrounding you so familiar.

His heartbeat thrummed in your ear as you continued to rest your face on his chest, hearing his breathing having evened out and realizing yours had done the same.

You reluctantly pulled away to look at him, still keeping your arms locked around his middle. “Should we get you home?”

Will’s mouth turned up on one side, his crooked smirk making you melt.

“Yeah,” he nodded, his hand falling to land on your lower back as you both turned to where his bag was left on the floor.

You expected a moment like this to feel awkward, but it was anything but, like you were learning each other all over again, standing in Will’s room with your arms around each other’s waist, your faces so close and your lips inches from touching.

Finally, Will leaned into you, softly pressing his lips on yours, making you hold your breath as you let your eyes close and kissed him back, a broken moan transferring into his mouth as you forced yourself to try to take in air again.

His hand ran across your back, pulling you close to him as he took a step into you, your shirt slipping up so his palm splayed out on your skin, that sensation alone making you shiver in addition to how good it felt to have his lips on yours again.

Kisses grew more intense as each second ticked by, only pausing when he lifted your shirt over your head, and despite feeling so desperate, you both continued to keep every touch slow and careful.

His fingers pinched the clasp of your bra together to release it, moving the straps down your shoulders until it fell from your body, returning his hands to your arms where he trailed his fingertips up them to your neck and then down to your bare chest.

You found the buttons on his shirt, blindly unfastening each one until you were able to peel it open, feeling his smooth chest and the defined muscles of his torso, his warmth radiating out onto you.

Will reached up to take hold of your face, angling your head to press his tongue deeper in your mouth, stealing every bit of air from you in the process.

Breathe, your mind begged, but kissing him was better than breathing.

The rough material of his fatigues brushed against your nipples, making your breath hitch in your throat even more, your body moving to rub against him again to replicate the feeling.

You were rid of your pants and underwear next, leaving you naked while Will remained in his uniform, but the intoxicating feel of your skin on his bare chest let him know that he needed to have as much skin-on-skin contact as possible, and he tore the garment off his upper body quickly before moving to his pants.

Once you were bared to each other, you returned to your slow caresses, touching and exploring with light fingers and hands, your pleasure brought on purely by love.

You stopped kissing him for a moment, teasing your lips on his until you managed to whisper, your voice thick with lust.

“I need you, Will. I need you inside me.”

His nose nudged your cheek as he agreed with the nod of his head, his hands clasping your face again like he feared if he went too long without kissing you, you would vanish.

He took your hand and led you to the bed, sitting down on it and shifted back slightly where you followed, straddling his lap and wrapping your arms around his neck, looking into his vibrantly blue eyes as he gazed at you lovingly.

His hands slid all along your back, bringing you closer to his body before they landed on your legs, guiding you to put them straight so they were behind him and you were seated flush against his lap.

You breathed out slowly as your forehead rested against his, feeling his cock settle at your folds, and when you moved your hips ever so slightly, you gasped at the sensation.

Will kissed along your jawline, his hands massaging your hips, ready to assist as you lifted yourself enough to reach between your bodies and take hold of his cock, guiding him to your entrance where you slowly sank onto his length.

Short, shuddered breaths were exchanged between you before you found each other’s lips again, and you gradually began to move together, finding a tempo that sang to you and helped display the love that had been missing.

Will held onto every part of you that he could, grasping at you as you rocked and rode him, his hips jutting up into yours in slow, meticulous thrusts to give you everything you needed, feeling your desperation grow while his did too.

Your clit rubbed against the coarse hairs above his cock, grinding until you were at the edge, the way your wet walls clenched around and encased him driving him to the brink what felt like faster than ever.

Even though you were both quick to arrive at your climaxes, nothing about it was rushed, savouring each movement to get there and not taking a single second for granted, every emotion felt transferred through your bodies.

Will kissed you hard, groaning into your mouth as he came undone, coating your walls and filling you completely with his hot cum that started to leak out of you as you continued to move on his shaft, your orgasm lagging just seconds behind.

Your fingers clawed at the back of his neck, scratching and digging into his flesh as your body took every bit of pleasure from him, the seal of your mouths breaking as you both panted for air, his head falling into the hollow of your neck while yours rested on the side of his, his hair soft on your cheek.

His mouth smeared wet across your collarbone as he moved his face, pressing sloppy, lazy kisses onto your skin as he continued to hold you close, feeling his chest and back expand and contract with each heavy breath while you kept your arms secured around him.

Will brought you with him as he laid down on his sheets, your bodies still connected, his fingertips tracing your hairline before he leaned toward you and kissed your lips again.

After a few more minutes of kissing, you tucked your face into his neck, your legs entwining with his, Will rolling over onto his back where he held your hand and brought it to rest on his chest.

A silent agreement seemed to settle between you to leave the talking until tomorrow, right now needing to simply be with each other, and like nothing had ever gone wrong, Will closed his eyes and fell asleep, his mind and body finding a peace he didn’t think he would ever have again.

---

Part 8

Taglist:

@sotwk @dailydragon08 @sunnys-day @thedreadandthefugitivemind @glassgulls

@littlenosoul @glitterypirateduck @momia2910 @maggotzombie @rmwarn90

@paintlavillered @casa-boiardi @stealfromthedevil @kmc1989 @justreblogginfics

@spaghettificationandpretzels @whatever-lmaoo @steviebbboi @charethcutestory02

@christinhunnam @hp-hogwartsexpress

[peppermint-toads]

ghost dealing with his pregnant southern wife’s cravings (aka you introduce simon to tomato mayo sandwiches). tw: pregnancy, a little smut, eating/food, a little vomiting. i didn’t proof read this

ghost loved coming home to you after tedious days doing paperwork on base.

whatever you were going, he’d wrap his arms around you, resting his chin on the top of your head and sighing. he probably smelled like man. gross, sweaty man, but you never commented on it.

when you fell pregnant he loved holding you like that even more, seeing your belly start to poke out as he gazed downward.

one night, he came home to you standing in front of the kitchen counter, arm gently sawing back and forth as you sliced a tomato.

he took his normal position, humming and closing his eyes. when he opened them again, he took in the scene in front of him.

“what is this, love?”

never did he expect you to cook for him, especially when you became pregnant. but maybe every once in a while when he came home particularly starving, he’d steal a bite or two of whatever you were making.

but lately, your meals had gotten a bit strange.

and really, it was his own fault. as soon as you’d so much as hinted at wanting to have simon’s kid, he had you anchored down to the hilt of him as he stuffed you with his cum.

“it’s ummm, tomatoes and sourdough, and mayo.”

you tilted your head back to look at him.

“that’s it?”

you shook your head, hair going staticky on his t-shit.

“salt and pepper, too.”

you watched as his face pinched into a grimace.

“hey!” you scowled. “don’t look at me like that mister beans on toast.”

you turned fully, playfully shoving his chest.

“used to eat this all the time as a kid. everybody kinda did.”

simon cracked as he saw embarrassment creep onto your features, like he’d made you feel gross for craving it.

you were often victim of trying new british “delicacies,” so it was only fair that he return the favor.

“alright, i’ll try one.” he shrugged.

he offered to help, but as always you refuse it. he watched as you slathered a generous layer of mayo onto each side of the bread, setting thick slices of tomato on top, and finishing it with enough pepper to make simon sneeze.

he winced when you handed him his plate, and you were suddenly nervous.

“it might not be that good, tomatoes being out of season and all.”

you both tuck into your sandwiches once settled on the couch, your preferred spot these days.

simon was pleasantly surprised. maybe a little too much mayo, but he was delighted.

you on the other hand, were gagging after taking a bite. it had you making a haste exit for the bathroom, where you found a familiar place on the floor, heaving into the toilet.

when you returned to the living room, sheepish, simon had discarded any evidence of the sandwiches and had put a pot of water on the stove to boil for plain noodles, one of the only things you could stomach recently.

“sorry si, i didn’t mean for that to happen. it’s just—”

you began to choke, suddenly overcome by emotion. he pulled you in tight, your face pressing into his shirt.

“i know love, i know.”

his hand smoothed up and down your back steadily until he felt your breathing return to normal and heard your sniffling stop.

“why don’t you find a movie, and i’ll finish up in here.” he nodded towards the kitchen

you did, finding a movie both of you would like, even though simon never really watched the screen anymore. he was too focused on you, watching your little belly rise and fall with every breath.

[feederandfeedee]

You said you prefer savory to sweet

But what about those crazy donuts topped with bacon and stuff

Absolutely not. Are you even hearing yourself anon? Donuts TOPPED with bacon? I’m sorry I will not be eating an entire donut topped with what, a fourth of a slice? A half a slice if I’m lucky and the bakery isn’t skimping? A tease of bacon? That’s even more torturous than just having a normal donut sans bacon. No thanks. Give me 24 slices of bacon and half a donut, not cut vertically, go ahead and slice the top off that baby so that I get all of the icing and none of the plain donut bread. Even as a feedee I only have so much stomach room and I’m not gonna waste it on plain donut bread when I could be having MOUNDS of bacon.

I’m very passionate about this.

[lovejosephquinn]

I don’t think I’ve ever sent you a request before! I’m not gonna ask for specifics cause I want you to work your 🤌magic🤌 so here we go!

You and Joe are hosting a dinner party for some friends and they’re supposed to start arriving in half an hour but suddenly he starts to feel a bit spicy!

Are you trying to kill me? Please, my brain now has a section taken up for just Joseph smut rpfs I swear

But I will do my best for you girl 👀 (tagging you so you definitely see it @mybffjoe)

UNDER 18'S DNI TYSM.

You caught your boyfriends reflection staring you down in the full length mirror at the other side of the room you were stood at, you'd barely spoke in the last couple of hours from getting the final preparations ready with food and getting ready. You were to be hosting your first dinner party in your new home together tonight and Joe had chosen now out of all the times to be giving you that look from the edge of the bed.

"What're you gawking at Joseph?" you stopped suddenly, peering a look and smiling over at him.

"Just the most beautiful, sexiest and most amazing woman I've ever seen in my entire life." He replied, his monotoned vocals low, and gravelly, which gave you food for thought. Your heart beating harder and your thighs pushing themselves together all at the same time.

"And she's all yours." You pulled the most pleasing look at him and you could've sworn you'd seen his pupils dilate twice the size than what they normal were.

"Damn right she is." Joe agreed, standing up and moving over behind you, wrapping his arms around you holding you tightly, laying his head down on your shoulder.

"Mm, you smell good." He hummed leaning into your neck, letting his lips lightly touch your skin as he took a breath in. "Jesus Christ, you're so fucking attractive."

"You got that from my perfume? Which you bought for me?" You giggled, trying to ignore the growing pool of wetness in-between your legs.

"Pretty much, it's just you though. I'm a lucky man." Joe pushed his body square against yours so there was no space left between you, you felt his cock growing against your back, the hardness trapping itself between you, his lips returning to your neck but the kisses becoming sloppier.

"How long do we have until they arrive?" Joe muttered between kisses.

You tapped on your phone at the side of you to see the time. "About 30 minutes at the most."

"Fanfuckingtastic." Joe took the opportunity which rose in front of him, pulling you back earning a squeal from yourself, then getting himself in front of you whilst you wobbled backwards, pushing you down onto the bed, climbing over you and crashing his lips onto yours, hungry for anything he could get right this second.

"What're you doing?" You knew full well what he was doing.

"Let's call it, killing time spending quality time." Joe winked and you felt your core snap, he wasn't the only one who thought that the other was the best thing since sliced bread.

"Take them off." Joe pointed down to your jeans and you shimmied them off in a matter of seconds, whilst Joe's followed. You were both bare from the waist down and he took a second to view you in all your vulnerability.

"My fucking perfect girl." Joe growled and you watched as his hand cupped your pussy, rubbing into your folds making your back arch at the sudden contact, he could do the most simplest of acts and you'd still of probably have cummed all over his hand then and there, especially from the deep gaze that fell straight to your eyes as he watched your body language alter so rapidly through his touch.

His fingertips found your clit in a matter of seconds. "Your pussy's already so wet for me, I didn't even do anything."

"Like you said, it's just you." He turned you on so god damn plain and simply. It was both a blessing and a curse.

Joe continued to kiss you as he teased your bud, lightly circling around it but not fully giving his all. "More." you moaned between kisses but he didn't budge. You tried to move your hand down to his to push the fingers harder but he slapped it away. "Uh-uh I don't think so."

No more than a millisecond past and Joe thrusted two fingers inside of you, your body thrusted into them, helping him to pick up a speed and get as deep as he possibly could. "You pretend you're so sweet and innocent baby, but you're just a whore for my fingers aren't you?"

You nodded, biting down on your bottom lip feeling the intensity grow when his thick fingers curled up inside of you, the third quickly being added to stretch you out, a relentless speed started. "Just like she likes it, fuck, moan for me beautiful."

A string of moans fell from your mouth in his last word, he could speak so crude yet so lovingly in one breath and that was soul destroying and quite frankly stomach wrenching, it only made the heat between your cunt and his fingers that little bit better.

"You want more of that or do you want this big cock inside of you? It's fucking throbbing for you, my perfect, god damn sexy little slut."

"I want your cock. Now. Please." He knew you were desperate too, you'd even threw manners into the mix so he couldn't tease you further. Joe pulled his fingers straight out and pushed them into your mouth for you to taste yourself, you sucked your juices straight off, lapping your tongue around them, knowing all to well it would drive him insane.

"Do me a favour, get my cock nice and wet before it goes in."

You nodded and as you went to sit up, Joe pushed you right back down again. "I didn't say move did I?" You felt confused for a second, that was until you saw him lunge up towards you, snaking his hand round and gripping the back of your head pushing you to the side and forcing his cock into your mouth. He thrusted downward to get a deeper access, the position you were in was so submissive and he fucked your mouth persistently, your eyes watering at the length being rammed down your throat.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." Joe pulled out quickly, he'd always said you had superior skills when it came to using your mouth, you knew it was proof there and then as the reason he stopped it as quickly as he did was that he was about to cum. Joe spread your legs out further, keeping your feet firmly pressed against the edge of the bed as he eased himself into your entrance, giving you every inch at once. Once adjusted, he started to move, getting quicker and quicker. He knew how you liked it, rough. Joe's moaned mirrored yours, giving you every last strain of energy he had left into fucking you ferociously. He knew it'd be over pretty quickly, you both knew it kind of needed to be.

"Are you close, pretty girl? I'm so fucking close. Your cunt will be the death of me I swear."

"Mhm." You couldn't bare to speak, your eyes squeezed shut feeling the familiar knot tighten in your stomach, you just needed something more to release it. So you took your finger to your clit and began to rub harshly, Joe's eyes shot straight to your movement, only making his cock drive into you with mercilessly. His thrusts were becoming messy. "Fuck yes." Joe threw his head back as he felt himself on the edge.

Your back arched once more, your thighs denied from closing as Joe fell in the way, his body had enclosed on top of yours as he pushed himself to the end. Your orgasm's washed over you in unison and you fell apart on each other, ungodly sounds breaking out from your mouths, your name's being called out several times, Joe's hands gripping onto the sheets whilst yours clawed up through his shirt and onto his back. The severity of it exhausted you both but it also made you crave more. You both knew it'd be inevitable that you'd be in the same position within the next few hours, doing it all over again.

Both breathless, Joe pulled out of you. That was when you heard bangs at the front door. "Shit." you laughed.

Joe moved over to look at his phone placed next to yours, 8 missed calls and 5 texts, oops.

"Our company's arrived my love. Guess we were too busy, what bad hosts we are."

You shook your head, taking Joe's hand as he offered you up for you to sort yourselves out post haste. "Better hurry up." You rushed back to the mirror where you initially started, ruffling your hair between your fingers.

As you both strutted out to answer the door, your friends stood there looking a slight mix of worried and confused. "We've been here for 10 minutes, almost thought you weren't in." They eyed the both of you up, awkwardly chuckling.

"I'm so sorry, we lost track of time." Joe clutched his arm around your waist bringing you tightly to his side, squeezing you slightly. You could definitely say that.

[ask-red-guy-dhmis]

Is it this guy?

Fish and juice

Steak and beef

Beans and eggs

Steak, eggs

Are you hungry?

You look to be a bit hungry

No

Duh, duh, duh, duh

Lots of people get hungry

That's your body

Hungry comes from your body

Get off me

But your body

It must, to have to be healthy

What's that? A tasty snack

You don't want to go around and eat a snack like that

Greedy, to eat all that

You'll end up with your teeth all grey

Do, do, do, do, do

Do, do, do, do, do, doing healthy

Food is talking

Let's get healthy now

Hello

You see, the body is like a special house

With blood, hair and organs in the different rooms

Oh look, there's Mr. Bladder there in the basement, ha, ha

What?

Now food comes in through the chimney, mouth

And goes from room to room, greeting the different organs

Hello

Now, the good healthy food is very nice and polite to the organs

And so, is invited to stay for the party

Yeah

But the bad, not healthy food

Are very rude and must leave through the cat flap

Rude!

That doesn't make sense

To, to, to, to, to

To, to, to, to, to, to be healthy

Hello?

What's that? A tasty snack

You don't want to go around and eat a snack like that

Greedy to eat all of that

You'll end up with your gums all grey

Yeah, but something's wrong

Exactly, how do we know which ones are the healthy foods to eat?

Well, that's easy

The food groups can easily be sorted using the simple health shape

Choosing normal plain looking foods

Such as bread, cream, white sauce and aspic

Keep the body ticking over just nicely

Isn't that right?

I need to go

But wait!

What's this?

Fancy, show-offy foods like

Cooked meats, fruit salad, soil food, and yolk

Ewh!

These foods will clog up the body

With unnecessary detail

Oh, no! Look, It's all broken and on the floor

Everything tastes great

Maybe we should wait before we put it on the plate

Or it could be too late

I don't want to do this any more

I choose a pizza slice

Bread and cheese will taste so nice

What's that? A pizza slice

But you're better off with plain white sauce

What's that? Plain white sauce

Plain white sauce makes your teeth go grey

Doesn't matter, just throw it away

Why not try something else on your tray

Oh, what's that? A lovely pie

But you're going to end up sad inside

Ewh! Sad inside

But everyone has their teeth go grey

Just eat yeast and it'll go away

But how much have you had today?

Too much yeast makes your teeth go grey

How about some onion paste?

Looks like fun, have a taste

That wasn't onion paste

You shouldn't eat food in a stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's...

NO NOT AGAIN PLEASE

[booksandpaperss]

kind of obsessed with the fact you've slowly gotten more blatant with heartstopper hate lmfao😭 it's like. fine to me it's cute but NOTHING SERIOUS IS EVER GOING ON so I gotta be in a really specific mood for it I still haven't watched s2. definitely couldn't be a fixation. and everyone fucking loves it it's the best thing since sliced bread and I'm like. why tho. and then any critique of it is sorta dumbed down to "oh you just don't like how sweet it is but teenagers deserve sweet romance" like ok but why's it gotta be boring though. and too healthy like beyond normal levels of healthy. like this is missing even the usual human levels of miscommunication. and it gets resolved too easy. sorry this was supposed to cut off 4 sentences ago I'm realizing now in your inbox that I apparently have beef with heartstopper

LKSSJJSJS LISTEN listen. I don’t even hate it. truly. I even genuinely enjoyed myself during the nick and Charlie parts bc that’s the part that thought is actually put into. I just hate how much everyone loves it so blindly

honestly my biggest beef with it is that it’s marketed and treated as the most genuine and diverse groundbreaking queer storyline there is when that’s literally so far from true and it really really shows ppls true colors when they think this bc the sapphics and POC are literal props it’s actually absurd for a show that’s supposed to be a safe space for queer ppl

and god do I hate that part of the reason it’s so popular is bc it portrays these queer teenagers as never having a single, physical thought in their entire life. there was this whole plot centered around one single hickey that Charlie had??? and something abt the physical attraction portion of it all, which they did try to show btw, felt disingenuous to me. and I know that’s why it’s so palatable to a mainstream audience and it pisses me off and again it just doesn’t feel genuine. which is ironically one of the main arguments against heartstopper criticism: “it’s not cringe it’s just earnest” when yeah maybe it’s Trying to be earnest but when u look at it from more than a surface level lens it’s not rlly succeeding

and I know the aroace storyline in season 2 with Isaac resonated with a lot of people and I think that’s wonderful, and I actually do think that was something that was done well, but how can you have a storyline around asexuality when you don’t show the contrast in how it is being an allosexual queer person. there was a whole lot of romantic attraction going on but even more tip toeing around the sexual attraction aspect. and I don’t expect it to be like sex education for example in terms of the focus on sex obv , but the lack of acknowledgment of that aspect of the queer experience paired with how much the uwu wholesomeness of it all is played up rlly rubs me the wrong way. once again: it feels dishonest

I was actually talking about this with one of my mutuals the other day and they pointed out that it is very plain that alice olseman did not consult a single queer man in the writers room. and if someone can prove this wrong be my guest but I rlly don’t think the whole physical attraction component would have been done so badly had an actual queer man been on the team. feels kind of like back in summer 2022 when byler shippers would literally shun and harass anyone who even implied that Will’s feelings for Mike probably included physical attraction meanwhile Noah Schnapp himself was making jokes about it bc he’s an actual gay teenager.

not gonna even get into right now how Tara and darcy felt even more like props this season than in the last one and I didn’t even like watching their scenes bc the writing itself felt performative. that’s a whole other post.

and man, wouldn’t it have been so nice if there had actually been people of color in that writers room. On a purely surface level heartstopper has a very diverse cast but once again, peel away even one layer and you realize it’s a bunch of tokenism, which brings me full circle back to my original point: you can’t say it’s peak representation and diversity when it’s whitewashed as hell and doesn’t gaf abt sapphics despite literally being written by one. guess she chose her whiteness over her queerness even when writing a queer story which wowwww sooooo original.

okayyyy anyways did NOT mean to write a whole essay but u discovering ur own beef reminded me of mine lmaooo

all of this was to say that basically I’m not gonna pretend I didn’t enjoy myself during parts of the show, and I don’t wanna shame ppl for liking it that is not at all what I’m trying to do here, it has its own place in queer media and if a show like this came out in like 2010 it would be groundbreaking despite its issues (but again it’s literally 2023 do fucking better) , but I take issue with people treating it like something it’s not and with the amount of love it gets I feel like I have to be really loud about my criticism of it, especially bc usually the criticism of the show that gets any attention isn’t even slandering it for the right reasons and like. if ur gonna hate on something queer and popular do it right

oh and heartstopper writers? maybe try speaking with an actual teenager once in your life before writing their dialogue they do not fucking communicate that well

okay I’m done now finally 🫡

[arvandus]

The Slow Death of Dreaming

Gojo had that dream again. The same one he’d been having for the past six months.  It was an unwelcome dream, deeply unwanted and entirely forbidden, more nightmare than dream. Not in a classically horror sort of way, but in a way that left him in pain each time he woke up, his lungs gasping for air, and his heart shredded beneath his ribcage.  It made him scared; but not scared of his safety, oh no.  Gojo never felt scared like that; his jujutsu inheritance made sure of that.  It was a different kind of fear; a fear of desire, a fear of wanting; a fear of what he was capable of in the deep imaginations of his mind, but would never, ever, act on.  Above all else, it was a fear of loss.  Not the kind of loss that comes with losing what one already had; no, this was a fear of a loss that already happened, a never-has-been that never-will-be.

He dreamed of love.  Sappy and stupid, he knew it.  He dreamed of a familiar smile that smiled only for him, of the touch of hands that cherished, of soft moans meant only for his ears.  He dreamed of a name; your name, whispered in the quiet of early mornings beneath covers, of late night cups of coffee in an empty kitchen.

He dreamed of family.  Of the sound of laughter, of the running of little feet.  He dreamed of his own eyes staring back at him, with little cheeks flushed in skin like yours.

He dreamed of the mundane; of a boring 9-5 job that made him want to gouge his eyes out if it meant that you’d be safe.  He dreamed of a house, a modest one, that didn’t stand out, where he could blend in unnoticed. A life of normalcy, where his only titles were “sensei,” “father,” and “husband.”

These were the dreams that plagued him, making him toss and turn, and wake late at night to sweaty sheets and a lonely room.  Dreams that tortured, mocking him for wanting more than he could have, more than he deserved.

Gojo hadn’t wanted these things before you. He had learned to accept his role, his life, his title, and all the impending risk and loss that would come with it.  And yet...

When he first met you, you’d been so... opposite of him, the antithesis of who and what he was.  You were plain, simple.  You were kind yet strong; sweet, with a tangy bite if he chewed too long.  And you were painfully, blissfully, human; ignorant of the dangerous world you lived in.

He could never coexist with someone like you.

And yet, maybe it was that novelty, that taste of the mundane, that initially caught his attention. It was like eating a simple slice of warm, buttered bread after feasting too long on spicy foods.  The world of Jujutsu was wild and dangerous, and you were not.  In a way, your presence was palette cleansing.

It unlocked something in him, something forbidden.

He had brushed it off at first; a casual dismissal of you and all you represented. Why would he possibly want that?  There was too much risk involved, the weight of commitment too heavy, the cost of loss too high.

But he learned quickly that feelings (he refused to call it love) didn’t work that way. It didn’t care how he felt, or what he wanted, or what the dangers were.  It just... existed, given life from the mundane things that he’d always sneered at before; little moments and actions that he’d never bothered to give thought or weight to.

A warm smile, a greeting, a gift, a welcoming into the home for a warm meal.  Teasing, jokes, the sound of laughter.  A warm hand on his arm, a concerned gaze that was far too perceptive for a normal person.  In an odd twist, you had a way of making him feel seen without ever truly seeing him completely, without ever learning about the world he came from.

Bit by bit, you stole parts of him without even knowing it.  It didn’t matter that your heart was already filled with someone else’s love; it didn’t matter that you had a gold ring on your finger and Gojo didn’t.  Even when your belly began to swell, growing with a new life that wasn’t his, it. Still. Didn’t. Matter.  It only made the ache worse, the longing more torturous until it felt like Gojo was slowly dying, watching the life he’d never get to have be lived for him.

Because no matter what, the things he dreamed of would never happen. Not with you.  And certainly not while you were married to his best friend.

[sillysadduck]

Is it this guy?

Fish and juice

Steak and beef

Beans and eggs

Steak, eggs

Are you hungry?

You look to be a bit hungry

No

Duh, duh, duh, duh

Lots of people get hungry

That's your body

Hungry comes from your body

Get off me

But your body

It must, to have to be healthy

What's that? A tasty snack

You don't want to go around and eat a snack like that

Greedy, to eat all that

You'll end up with your teeth all grey

Do, do, do, do, do

Do, do, do, do, do, doing healthy

Food is talking

Let's get healthy now

Hello

You see, the body is like a special house

With blood, hair and organs in the different rooms

Oh look, there's Mr. Bladder there in the basement, ha, ha

What?

Now food comes in through the chimney, mouth

And goes from room to room, greeting the different organs

Hello

Now, the good healthy food is very nice and polite to the organs

And so, is invited to stay for the party

Yeah

But the bad, not healthy food

Are very rude and must leave through the cat flap

Rude!

That doesn't make sense

To, to, to, to, to

To, to, to, to, to, to be healthy

Hello?

What's that? A tasty snack

You don't want to go around and eat a snack like that

Greedy to eat all of that

You'll end up with your gums all grey

Yeah, but something's wrong

Exactly, how do we know which ones are the healthy foods to eat?

Well, that's easy

The food groups can easily be sorted using the simple health shape

Choosing normal plain looking foods

Such as bread, cream, white sauce and aspic

Keep the body ticking over just nicely

Isn't that right?

I need to go

But wait!

What's this?

Fancy, show-offy foods like

Cooked meats, fruit salad, soil food, and yolk

Ewh!

These foods will clog up the body

With unnecessary detail

Oh, no! Look, It's all broken and on the floor

Everything tastes great

Maybe we should wait before we put it on the plate

Or it could be too late

I don't want to do this any more

I choose a pizza slice

Bread and cheese will taste so nice

What's that? A pizza slice

But you're better off with plain white sauce

What's that? Plain white sauce

Plain white sauce makes your teeth go grey

Doesn't matter, just throw it away

Why not try something else on your tray

Oh, what's that? A lovely pie

But you're going to end up sad inside

Ewh! Sad inside

But everyone has their teeth go grey

Just eat yeast and it'll go away

But how much have you had today?

Too much yeast makes your teeth go grey

How about some onion paste?

Looks like fun, have a taste

That wasn't onion paste

You shouldn't eat food in a stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's plate

A stranger's...

yall dont know this but he has been spamming this on our private chat non stop

[yukipri]

Galaxy's Edge Foodstuffs & Drinkstuffs Reviews!

So last month, I was able to finally visit Black Spire Outpost, aka Batuu, aka Galaxy's Edge, aka Star Wars Land @ Disneyland!

This is a roundup of photos + reviews of all the themed foods & beverages that mum and I enjoyed during our trip.

Note that I visited Batuu West, in Disneyland California. Florida may have slightly different menus, and I know that menus change seasonally too! My visit was in January, 2023.

The rest of the photos + reviews under the cut!

Oga's Cantina

In the early morning on the very first day, we stopped by Oga's! We got some non-alcoholic drinks + some small eats to start the day off.

Non-Alcoholic drinks:

Memory's foggy, but I *think* the drinks are: 

Blurrgfire: Minute Maid® Lemonade, Pomegranate Juice, and Habanero-Lime

Review: Mildly zingy? but otherwise a pleasant juice drink.

Black Spire Brew: Cold Brew Joffrey's Coffee®, Honey, Falernum, Passion Fruit, and Citrus

Review: Probably the most questionable drink we had, but glad we tried it! The coffee + citrus gave it a sorta...sour? taste? and I'm not sure how I felt about that in my coffee! But it was certainly unique.

Blue Bantha: Blue Milk served chilled with Bantha-inspired Brown Butter Chocolate Chip and Coconut Cookie

Review: Realizing now we didn't get the cookie, sad ;_; It was ok, but idk it felt like it tasted a lot better from the Milk Stand! It was also kinda room temperature, though we *were* in the very first early morning round of people. Overall didn't stand out too much, but wasn't bad either!

Jabba Juice: Simply Orange® with Pineapple, Kiwi, Cantaloupe, and Blueberry Flavor-filled Boba

Review: A slightly mixed-juice but mostly orange juice with some blue popping boba! Was good in a normal, could probably make it at home sorta way.

Food stuffs:

Five-blossom Bread: Warm Pretzel Knot with Hawaiian Black Sea Salt, served with Calabrian Cheese Sauce

Review: It was super warm 'n toasty, surprisingly filling! It was a pretty normal pretzel and the sauce was a pretty normal slightly spicy cheese sauce, but it was still delicious!

Spiced Wroshyr Pods: Seasoned Edamame, Sliced Cucumbers, spicy Citrus-Gochujang Dip

Review: Ngl, these were just straight up plain edamame ^ ^;;; BUT the sauce was really good, preferred it to the pretzel sauce even!

I had another reservation at Oga's on a different night, and this time we tried some alcohol. Now, tbh I am not a huge fan of alcohol; I can drink it, but I just don't really like the flavor, and have never gotten drunk (nor do I really want to), and all it makes me feel is the vague urge to pee. But, I felt obligated to try something alcoholic at the cantina, so here's what I *think* we got!

Jedi Mind Trick (alcoholic): Ketel One Botanical Grapefruit and Rose Vodka, John D. Taylor's Velvet Falernum, Bols Blue Curaçao, White Grape Juice, Lime Juice, and Grapefruit Bitters

Review: It was defs sweet? Fruity? But alas, Alcohol taste was strong for me ;_;

Hyperdrive (Punch It!) (Non-alcoholic): Powerade® Mountain Berry Blast, White Cranberry Juice, Black Cherry Purée, and Sprite®

Review: Got one non-alcoholic drink, and ngl it was definitely my fav drink out of the 3 ^ ^; Unfortunately don't remember much of it, other than that I was using it to cleanse the alcohol flavor...

Fuzzy Tauntaun: Cîroc Peach Vodka, Bols Peach Schnapps, and Simply Orange® topped with Tangerine, Pure Cane Sugar, "Buzz Button Tingling" Foam

Review: This was the most recommended drink by people we spoke to + blogs I read, so I figured hey let's try it. Other people have described the foam as "tingly," but tbh...neither mum nor I really felt it? It was very foam for sure, messy, hard to get at the drink without getting foam all over your face. Taste was pretty mild (+ alcohol, LMAO).

In conclusion: Kazu, u know u don't like alcohol, plus it's expensive. Let's just stick to non-alcohol next time and save our credits, yeah? ^ ^;

Docking Bay 7

I LOVED Docking Bay 7! It was surprisingly spacious, and perhaps because we went when it wasn't too busy, but there was never any trouble getting seating. With mobile pickup food was ready almost instantaneous, and the whole interior had such an awesome aesthetic with tons of cool design details!

Trandoshan-style Pasta with Braised Bantha: Chile-braised Beef, Buttered Garlic Cavatelli, Seasonal Vegetables, Zesty Avocado Sauce, Balsamic Glaze

Review: This is the green-lookin' dish! I LOVED this one, so much I went and got it again on a different day. It's pasta, which I'm naturally biased towards, but also a lotta meat and veggies too, and pleasantly spiced. It felt like a Good Food, while also being unique and interesting enough it felt sorta Star Wars, I really enjoyed it!

Endorian Fried Chicken Tip-Yip: Crispy Chicken, Roasted Vegetable Potato Mash with Green Gravy

Review: Also good! But tasted a lot more "normal." It's a nice piece o' chickin floating in a ton of mashed potato gravy. Warm and filling, but didn't really feel as themed.

Drinks!

Moof Juice: Simply Fruit Punch®, Simply Orange® with Pineapple, Chipotle-Pineapple

Review: Another pleasant fruit juice! Gosh there are so many fruit juice mixes here! Not complaining bc I love them. Don't really remember too much about this other than "sweet."

Phattro: Gold Peak® Unsweetened Tea, Minute Maid® Lemonade, Desert Pear

Review: Another mixed juice drink, mum and I could only tell it apart from Moof Juice bc this one was mildly less sweet, more tea. Both were good!

Cold Brew Black Caf: Cold Brew Coffee topped with Sweet Cream Cheese and Chocolate Puffs

Review: I actually really enjoyed this one!! Much more than the questionable coffee at Oga's. It's got literal cereal floating on top! One thing that we found was that it wasn't as sweet or well mixed right after picking it up (no duh), but if you wait for the cream cheese and cocoa puffs dust to trickle down (or just mix it), it's a lot sweeter and so much yummier!

Also from the Docking Bay:

Vintian Mineral Mousse: Banana Brûlée-centered Dark Chocolate Mousse, Strawberry Mousse, Vanilla Chantilly, Chocolate Crumble, Cherry Garnish

Review: THIS THING. Y'all, if I had to pick just one food item to recommend from all of Galaxy's Edge, it would be this. Wasn't really sure what it was at first, and almost didn't order because I'm not a huge fan of banana flavor, but I'm SO glad that we did. Each of the blobs is a different flavored mousse, the banana being the largest, and i *think* the blue was Vanilla, pink strawberry, though those may be flipped. They each had a sorta shell like covering with soft mouse inside. They all tasted incredibly fancy and delicate, like very expensive patisserie quality, and each blob was so distinctive so you never got bored. I even liked the banana one, though I preferred the other two. The best way to eat is to take a spoonfull, and then scoop through the crumble to pick up as much of it as possible. The added crunch makes it even better!

Overall, this not only tasted phenomenal, but it had gorgeous and distinctively "Star Wars" visual presentation, and overall was so unique!

Moving on,

Milk Stand + Ronto Roasters

While the Milk Stand and Ronto Roasters are completely different shops and aren't even close, I picked up drinks from the Milk Stand for breakfast on our second day, so reviewing them together!

Blue Milk: Plant-based blend of Coconut and Rice Milk with alluring fruity characteristics

Review: The Iconic Drink. I hear that people have mixed opinions about this, but I actually really liked it—and it also tasted SUPER familiar. If any of you have had ramune before, the Japanese soda drink in a funky glass bottle that you can find at most Asian markets, it tasted SUPER similar. Perhaps part of me is biased bc my Japanese ass associates blue = ramune, but really, if someone made a ramune slush and maybe added a wee bit more citrus, this would be it. I also happen to love ramune, and slushes, so of course this was a win! If you want to taste ramune to see what Blue Milk tastes like (at least in my own humble opinion, backed by mum), make sure to pick up the "original" flavor! Overall this was super chilled and refreshing, I loved it!

Green Milk: Plant-based blend of Coconut and Rice Milk with zippy citrus and tropical characteristics

Review: I read some reviews that this was nasty, but I didn't think so, it was also pleasant. There was a bit of a strange, possibly slightly medicinal aftertaste, and it was also "milkier" than the blue so it felt less refreshing. Of the two, I definitely prefer blue, but enjoyed my cup of the green too!

Ronto Morning Wrap: Scrambled Eggs, Grilled Pork Sausage, Shredded Cheddar, Peppercorn Sauce, wrapped in Pita

Review: A very yummy wrap from Ronto's, only available in the morning! I felt like of the 3 wraps, this one was the richest, with a lotta cheese, egg, sausage. It was filling and super good! I wouldn't say that the food item itself felt particularly unique, but Ronto's has a super cool setup, so just being able to eat in the vicinity puts you into the universe.

Evening on a different day, we tried the other wraps!

Ronto Wrap: Roasted Pork, Grilled Pork Sausage, Peppercorn Sauce, tangy Slaw, wrapped in Pita

Review: The classic. I was expecting to like this one the most, and while it didn't disappoint, the others were actually so good they all sorta evened out? For being the meat option, it had a lotta veggies and didn't feel unhealthy, at least compared to my usual diet LMAO. I liked this a lot, and like the morning wrap, it was very tasty in a normal food sorta way!

Ronto-less Garden Wrap: Plant-based Sausage, spicy Kimchi Slaw, sweet Pickled Cucumber, Plant-based Gochujang Spread, wrapped in Pita

Review: Usually not a huge fan of fake meat, but this vegetarian option was actually really good! Of the 3, I think I might have even liked the flavoring best? It had a bit of zing to it, possibly due to the kimchi. Either way, I'm glad I was able to split these with mum!

Hard to say which of the wraps I liked most, I think I liked all of them around the same! None of them stuck out as Exceptional, but they were all good!

Drinks from Ronto:

Tatooine Sunset: Gold Peak® Unsweetened Tea, Minute Maid® Lemonade with Melon and Blueberry

Review: Yet another pleasant fruity drink! Don't remember much about it, other than that I liked it, and it once leaned mildly less sweet than the other one ^ ^;

Meiloorun Juice: Pineapple Juice, Minute Maid® Lemonade, with Blueberry, Cranberry Juice, Lemon Juice, and Desert Pear

Review: THIS ONE. If I had to choose ONE fruit juice out of the tons I had, this one is my favorite. I want to say that "Meiloorun" in the name isn't biasing me (it may be), but no really, this one was genuinely so good. It felt denser? than the others, really citrusy but the flavors were really well mixed so it tasted like an all-new fruit, exactly what I'd expect a Meiloorun to be like! I chugged two of these lmao.

Got this on the final day, also from Ronto:

Destran Ice Cap: Sprite®, Orange-Tangerine Syrup, topped with Sweet Cream Cheese

Review: Wasn't sure about the whole "cream cheese in soda," but I'm glad I tried this because I actually really liked it! The cream cheese added a pleasant, well, creaminess to the orange soda of the rest of it, giving it a sort of ice cream float-like feel without the ice cream. Would defs get again!

Lastly,

Kat Saka's Kettle

Picked this up on the last day!

Outpost Mix: colorful blend of seasonal flavors (blend of Caramel and Chocolate-glazed Popcorn)

Review: Honestly just a pleasant popcorn mix! It was good, flavor wasn't too strong, pretty mild. Was a nice easily consumable crunchy snack. It says caramel + chocolate, but tbh I mostly just tasted "mildly sweet." I was hoping for the brightly colored purple/red mix that at least looks a bit unique, but perhaps that's for a different season? Either way, yeah, I enjoyed this but didn't feel it was particularly special ^ ^;

~~

Aaaaand that's my review! I didn't quite eat *everything* at Galaxy's Edge, but I tried a darn good majority.

Overall, the vast majority of food/drink was super darn good and well worth the money! Some was more unique than others, but the quality was consistently high throughout. I did not eat outside of Galaxy's Edge my entire trip and felt very satisfied with that!

My standout favorites were: the pasta & mousse dessert from Docking Bay 7, blue milk from the Milk Stand, and Meiloorun juice from Ronto's!

I also got all 3 of the thermal detonator-shaped water bottles, but well, the flavor inside was just your regular Coke, Diet Coke, and Sprite. Still cool souvenirs!

But yes, in general, just so many fruit juices haha. Luckily I do love fruit juices, and also I'm glad that all of the bathrooms in Batuu were both clean, spacious, *never* had lines, and were also super cool-looking. Because given the amount of sugar water I was chugging, yeah. I visited them a lot!

While there's a good variety of food on Batuu and I think they did a great job with the menu, there were a few things that I hope they expand on in the future.

First, while there were some options for folks with dietary restrictions, they were extremely limited. Unsurprising, as most of the food shops already have an extremely limited menu with single digit menu items total. But it would still be nice to see these menus be expanded in the future, or possibly adding additional shops so that something, somewhere might work.

Next, I felt myself wishing for more take-home souvenir-type food. Liked boxed cookies, chocolates, y'know? Sure, you could technically take home the popcorn, but it's just in a brown bag. I'm genuinely shocked they didn't have Grogu's blue macaron cookies, I'm sure those would sell insanely well. Mouse-man, u listening?

Again, I know a lot of food menu items are seasonal/limited, so I hope I can visit again when things have switched around!

If you've been to Batuu, what were your favorite things to taste there?? Any hot items I missed?

Anyway, I hope you found this review to be interesting! Thanks for reading!!

[gyuluttony]

Ok so I would like to submit a request for a verkwan fic please 👉👈 So basically you know how all of seventeen has talked about how all vernon eats when left on his own is just like jam and bread, well seungkwan sees this behavior and is like no I’m going to get you to eat properly, which starts off as seungkwan feeding him normally, and then overfeeding him 🤭

And you know vernon would just go along with it because of how whipped he is for seungkwan

I really liked your first fic and I hope this is a fun prompt to fill <3

verkwan my beloved. fun fact is that even before i started to stan them properly, i was well aware of verkwan because they're just so adorably perfect for each other. a very natural pair that always hits my soft spot. very happy to give back to the person that inspired me to write over here haha hope you enjoy @carattummies

also, i think for requests, i'll need people to specify if they want smut or not because my natural reaction is to just write smut in 😭

Not On My Watch

This is a feederism fic and features weight gain, ill-fitting clothes, breaking clothes, and blowjobs. Don't like, don't read.

The setting for this one is university students and these two just moved in together (I promise, I can write other scenarios but roommates makes things so much easier sdfj)

"Absolutely not."

The slice of bread was about to be bitten before he waved at Seungkwan, happy to see that his friend's practical exam had gone well enough. Although, he looked plain shocked when Seungkwan walked up to him and placed his hand down on the plate, leaving the jam stuck to the plate.

"Hey! I was going to eat that!" He looked genuinely upset as the plate now looked like a crime scene with the jam splatter against it.

Meanwhile, Seungkwan looked all sorts of disturbed as he saw the entire break down. "First of all, I don't get why you were eating with the spread side down. Isn't it messier?"

"The jam will touch my tongue first so it tastes better eating it like that." There's a moment of silence as Seungkwan considers it as he realizes Vernon isn't wrong in this assumption, it's just weird by the standards of society and honestly, he would have respected it (or just looked past it because he does that a lot for Vernon).

But, he shakes his head to regain his composure, "That's not the problem actually. The problem is that every meal that you have had since we have moved in together and was not purchased by one of us has been jam and bread!" Seungkwan very overtly turned his head to the side to look at the empty jars they now had as containers and the most recent addition being in the sink since Vernon had went through another one.

Vernon didn't really look fazed as he tried to angle the best way to get the bread off the plate without losing too much jam. "Ah, Kwannie, I don't want to open the new jar yet but this might have been too brutal for me not to."

A loud groan left Seungkwan as he took the plate, leaving Vernon moping at the table in the meantime. "I thought Joshua was joking when he said that was all you ate... Give me a minute."

He didn't expect the first thing he would have done was to make breakfast for his manbaby of a roommate but he simmered down at seeing Vernon so excited at the dishes that he made.

"Wow! You basically made an American breakfast. You're spoiling me." He filled his plate with pancakes, home fries, sausages and eggs before he began to chow down. "You're the best roommate any person could ask for Kwannie."

Seungkwan took a much more modest portion as he rolled his eyes, smiling fondly at the praise. "You really need to fix your eating habits and... actually, I'll fix it myself because if we have to add one more jar of jam to our containers, I think I'm going to lose it."

As he shoveled the food into his mouth greedily, Vernon nodded, "Let me know what to buy for groceries then since you'll be cooking." He closed his mouth around a forkful of pancakes and groaned at the flavour. "Yeah. Don't worry, it'll be fixed if you're cooking this often."

It was a little much to adjust to since now he was cooking a lot of their meals but he wasn't going to let the groceries Vernon bought go to waste. Plus, when the guy was making requests, it was hard for him not to comply because he practically beaming as he cleared out the entire plate while asking for seconds.

There was a couple of cons of making new dishes and one of them was that Seungkwan didn't really trust himself to adjust when getting used to recipes so he always stuck with the original portion sizes. While usually meant for families of four or more, it was starting to disappear quicker, sometimes, there weren't even leftovers in the dishes that he had made.

And it didn't take rocket science to know where these dishes were ending up. (Certainly hope it didn't because both of them were majoring in some form of music.)

He had fixed Vernon's eating habits but at this point, he believed that he might have given him another one. It wasn't uncommon for Vernon to sleep at the table. When they had first met, both of them were on the slimmer side and if anything, Seungkwan carried more weight and it was only because he worked out consistently.

Now, he felt smaller than ever compared to him.

Walking around the table to clear the dishes that were left, he looked at Vernon, who's gut inflated from the amount of spaghetti that he had eaten today. Where he once had a flat abdomen was now a monstrous gut that rested comfortably on the table, expanding slightly as he slept off the calories that were now digesting in his stomach.

Seungkwan had to take a deep breath to calm himself down before he went to the kitchen to do the dishes. Before, the other man was able to do dishes alongside him and he noticed his gut spreading onto the counter, hanging out of his shirt to emphasize just how much he grew.

It was his fault that Vernon had gotten so big... but that only made him more excited to see him grow and besides, if Vernon wasn't outwardly complaining about the weight, maybe he could see how much the scales tipped.

It was hard to not break his cool when he saw Vernon practically pouring himself into pants that didn't fit around his fattened thighs and much less around his plump behind. He pointedly turned up the TV and focused on the show that was suddenly interesting when he heard a loud rip that night at dinner, knowing that there was a rip in the seat of Vernon's pants that'd he'd likely see when they did their laundry.

But, despite Vernon eating himself out of clothes, he kept up with the larger portions of food Seungkwan was making, ending up more and more glutted on the meals that he was preparing and growing more with each passing day.

By the time the semester ended, Seungkwan was listening to music in his room when he heard Vernon from across the hall, "Uh, Kwannie? Can you do me a favour?"

Turning down his speaker, Seungkwan walked over and nearly tripped when he entered Vernon's room at the sight. Buttons decorated the floor as he saw the other man sitting at the bed. Vernon's gut hung between his thighs and even was covering his crotch as he leaned back, just inspecting his girth, playing with it.

"I need you to buy me some new clothes. This was the last shirt that I had that I could squeeze into and-" Vernon's eyes widened when Seungkwan roughly threw himself against him in a heated kiss and gripped as much belly fat as he could. Vernon's fattened arm found Seungkwan's trim waist and pulled him closer, a moan leaving the smaller man.

They made out for a couple of minutes before Seungkwan pulled away. "Oh my god, I'm... so sorry I fattened you up without telling you. I was just getting carried away." A gentler kiss was used to shut him up as Vernon smiled easily, "It's fine. I know you wanted to fix my eating habits and you did. Plus, you got me hooked on everything you made. Just another thing about you to like."

A smile spread on Seungkwan's face before his hand moved down Vernon's side as he spoke coyly, "Want me to give you another?" His hand heaved up Vernon's gut, getting a moan from the other man as Seungkwan's hand rested on his crotch.

"Please." It was the last cue that he needed before he moved his way down, pulling down Vernon's underwear and being greeted with his fat pad and large erection as it smacked against the bottom of his stomach, getting another groan of pleasure from him.

Seungkwan's tongue circled the tip as the sounds that were leaving Vernon almost rivaled the way he groaned at the table when eating one of his favourites. Every part of him was jiggling in pleasure as Seungkwan's head bobbed up and down, taking him deep into his throat naturally. His gut was pressing into Seungkwan's forehead as he enjoyed the feeling greatly, knowing that Vernon was practically nonverbal at the feeling of being blown when his dick hadn't gotten attention in weeks.

The warning was brief but Seungkwan felt his mouth fill as Vernon finished. He saw the way Vernon wanted to grab his head but couldn't reach because his body had fattened up to that point. Grabbing a tissue to spit it out, Seungkwan patted Vernon on his massive belly while he tried to catch his breath.

"So, I guess I worked up your appetite?"

The growl in response told him he was going to have to prepare a lot for tonight.

[munson-blurbs]

Hello my love, congratulations on 2k! I’m so proud and lucky to call myself your friend 💚

Here’s my person, place, and thing for you: Eddie + O’Donell’s classroom + bread

Love you!!! - @corroded-hellfire 😘

IT'S BREAD!! Fucking poppadom? Poppadom???? It's BREAD.

Warnings: none WC: 757 A/N: For those of you unfamiliar with the reference, please watch this little gem. You are welcome.

--

Eddie Munson is your typical teenager with an endless appetite. He usually counts down the seconds until his lunch period, promptly scarfing down whatever food he shoved in his lunchbox for the day. But today, he has too much on his mind to remember to eat. He’s been planning the final campaign of the year–of his high school career, now that he’s finally graduating–and it all culminates this afternoon. He skipped lunch to get the drama club room ready, practically trembling with excitement for the club to meet.

But two hours later, in the middle of O’Donnell’s lecture on iambic pentameter, Eddie is shaking for another reason: he’s starving.

“Shit, shit, shit,” he whispers under his breath, reaching into his backpack for the metal box. He opens it as carefully as he can, knowing that any small noise will tip O’Donnell off to his activity. That wench has a strict ‘no eating’ policy in her classroom, and Eddie can’t risk getting detention today. Not when Hellfire is counting on him to deliver the wildest campaign of their lives.

Peering at his options, he immediately rules out the orange. Too fragrant; plus, peeling it would totally give him away. The pretzels are a decent choice, but she might be able to hear him crunching on them, so he saves them for later. That leaves two slices of plain Wonder Bread. He’d normally slather them in peanut butter, but he forgot to put more on the shopping list. It works out in his favor this time, since he’ll be more easily able to sneak bites as O’Donnell blathers on.

“Can someone give me an example of a famous piece of literature that utilizes iambic pentameter? Anyone?” She glances around the room, seeing only bored faces. Chrissy Cunningham is twirling her honey-blonde hair around her finger. Jason Carver is wobbling a pencil between his thumb and forefinger, making it look like rubber. And Eddie Munson is…

“Mr. Munson!” Mrs. O’Donnell hisses, snapping him from his thoughts. “What exactly do you think you’re doing?”

“It’s just bread,” Eddie murmurs, voice barely audible as he tries to stifle an eyeroll.

“I’m sorry? I didn’t quite catch that,” the teacher presses, angrily putting her hands on her hips.

“It’s BREAD!” he says, loudly this time. He doesn’t mean to shout, but his temper is short when he’s hungry, and he rarely has patience for the old bat to begin with. “It’s bread,” he repeats, leveling his voice.

Mrs. O’Donnell releases an exasperated sigh. “Mr. Munson, my question was rhetorical. I do not care what you are eating, only that you are eating during my class time.” She shakes her head in disappointment. “Do I interrupt your lunch period and try to teach you?”

“Uh…no?” Eddie answers slowly, shoving the remaining half slice of bread in his mouth.

The teacher fights the urge to roll her eyes, marching to her desk to write out a detention slip. “Once again, that was a rhetorical question. Now, you know the consequence for eating in–”

“Mrs. O’Donnell?” a small voice pipes up from the doorway. Eddie looks over to see Max Mayfield, red hair hanging in braids over her shoulders. “There are girls smoking in the bathroom. It smells kinda like a skunk?”

O’Donnell throws her hands up in the air. “Oh, for crying out loud!” She turns to her class. “Open your textbooks to chapter ten and read until I–” But she’s interrupted yet again, this time by the bell. Eddie scrambles from his seat and bolts from the room as fast as he can, tugging Max along with him. 

“Hey, Red,” he manages, catching his breath once he’s safely out of O’Donnell’s sight. “Thanks for the diversion. I owe you one.”

Max gives a small chuckle. “Yeah, well,” she shrugs, “if you couldn’t have Hellfire today, Lucas was gonna tag along with me and El at the movies, and he always picks the weirdest sci-fi ones. So annoying. You probably did me the favor, actually.” She starts to walk away, but turns around to add, “but if you did wanna thank me, I love Reese's Pieces. Not the cups. The pieces.” She wags a finger at him before slipping on her headphones and disappearing into the sea of students.

Eddie clicks his tongue. “Weird kid,” he says to himself, but he takes a pen from his pocket and writes Reese’s Pieces on his forearm. And before he can forget, he also jots down peanut butter.

What was O’Donnell’s problem? He thinks. It was just bread.

--

[calmdownandcook]

Calm Down and Cook Every Single Meatloaf

Basic meatloaf should be in everyone’s “recipes I know without looking up the actual recipe” collection. It opens the doorway to so much more and it strangely impresses everyone. Meatloaf is really just the evolution of Country Pâté (also known as Terrine De Campagne). Fancy! It is also the dish I order to judge the quality of a diner (just like I judge Mexican restaurants by their salsa). But Meatloaf is also something so easy to make at home. A meatloaf dinner also sets the stage for a meatloaf sandwich the next day, and who doesn’t love that? Meatloaf can even evolve into meatballs and then into Swedish Meatballs (so you don’t have to find yourself an Ikea).

Meatloaf can be made from almost any ground meat, eggs, and a few breadcrumbs. The seasoning can be any flavor profile or nationality that is ringing your bells at the moment. There was a trend of packaged dry Onion Soup mix instead of salt and pepper. Still a traditional and solid option. I think everyone has a packet of taco seasoning in the back of their spice cabinet, perfect time to use it. Meatloaf can be served hot or cold. It can be stuffed with almost anything, from cheese to pickles, to asparagus. Your friends will think you won the James Beard Award for Best Chef. Don’t be afraid. You’re in charge, not the meatloaf. Meat “loaf” can be done in a loaf pan or, if you prefer the crispy outside bits, shape it free form on a baking dish in an oval shape. I can remember my Mom once forming a meatloaf in a heart shape on Valentine's Day. I thought she was a magician. 

This is what meatloaf can do for you. What can you do for meatloaf? Here is a basic recipe that can be used as a springboard for endless variations. 

Basic Meatloaf

2 pounds ground meat.

1 egg

½ small onion (finely chopped)

3/4 cup milk

1 cup plain dried bread crumbs

1 teaspoon of Salt 

½ teaspoon of pepper 

½ cup of Any BBQ sauce

Instructions:

Let's start with the base. Combine all the ingredients except the BBQ sauce in a large bowl. Mix until it is evenly combined, this is your meatloaf base, your basic meatloaf. Shape the mixture into an oval loaf on a greased baking pan or in a greased loaf pan. Bake at 350°F for 45 minutes. Remove the meatloaf from the oven, spread the BBQ sauce all over the top, and bake for an additional 10-20 minutes until fully cooked (check to ensure internal temp is 165°F). Total cooking time will be about 60 minutes whether you are using the BBQ sauce or not. Allow it to rest for 10 minutes before slicing and serving.

Now, let's have fun and start coloring outside the lines:

First, why BBQ sauce? If you’re not in the mood it can be swapped out for ketchup, or sweet chili sauce, or eliminate that step completely. Not a big deal.

A basic meatloaf with 2 pounds of meat should serve 8 people. In reality, I think, it serves 6 but you should have in your head that it will serve 4 people because you are a normal human being and are going to want to have meatloaf sandwiches for lunch tomorrow. 

Any ground meat will work so look in your freezer. You can use 100% ground beef or go with the classic combination of beef, pork, and veal. If you struggle with veal that's Ok. Skip it and use 50% beef and 50% pork. On the other extreme, venison is also a tasty choice and gives a slightly gamey taste. If you want to try 100% ground pork here’s a tasty idea: stir in ½ of a finely chopped apple into the meatloaf base. Just remember, you’ll need a total of 2 pounds of meat. But this can be plus or minus. 2 ½ pounds is fine, just remember you will need another 15 minutes of cooking. The same goes with using only 1 ½ pounds of meat. The cooking time will be about 15 minutes less. Check the internal temperature with a thermometer and look for 165 degrees. Kitchen thermometers are a lot more accessible, affordable, and a solid purchase. They are a great tool to have and will give you the confidence to experiment with basic recipes.

If you decide to use ground Chicken or Turkey you will see that it is “wetter” than other ground meat so you will want to increase your breadcrumbs to a total of 1½ cups. Chicken and Turkey can also be very lean. A good solution for this is to lay a few slices of bacon across the top (also, because it’s bacon) as this will add fat and flavor, a couple of pats of butter along the top works nicely too.

Herbs: fresh or dried. Do you have a favorite herb? A teaspoon of dried or a tablespoon of chopped fresh is a great way to experiment with taste. Something as simple as chives and parsley will go a long way to flavoring your base. If you are using ground lamb, try rosemary.

Of course store bought breadcrumbs can also be replaced with homemade crumbs from leftover stale bread (I do not throw things away lightly). Tear the stale bread into 2-inch chunks and pulse in a food processor. “Pulse” is when you turn your processor on and off several times so you can really chop something up finely without it turning into a paste. Make a bunch of crumbs all at once and freeze the leftovers for another use.

If you only have “Italian” breadcrumbs then, maybe skip the salt because that comes already salted. Are you all about the Italian-flavored bread crumbs? Try adding flavors that will enhance that profile. A little dried oregano, garlic powder, crushed garlic, and a pinch of hot pepper flakes are great. Any or all of these can work. A ½ teaspoon of each work but you go with your intuition, you can add more or less. Parmesan cheese (up to ½ cup) is an easy addition if you have some lurking in the back of your fridge.

Now, open your horizons and truly look around your kitchen. Do you have any vegetables that are moments away from the compost pile? Chopped them up well. They can go in the meatloaf base and stretch the dish in a very inexpensive way (just don’t use more than 25% chopped vegetables in the mix. If you do, the meat will lose its ability to hold its shape and the loaf falls apart.). My Mom would do this with sad floppy carrots, celery, and mushrooms. These all work well and add to the flavor.

Next, stuffed meatloaf. If you go this route, you are going to want to add 10 minutes to the initial cooking time and make it 55 minutes. Take about  ⅔  of whatever meatloaf base you decide to make and lay it on your baking sheet or loaf pan (whatever you are using). Form a trough (trench, channel, hollow) down the middle with your fingertips. Spoon in your filling and then use the remaining ⅓ of your base to close it up. Once this is done, dip your hands in some cold water and smooth and close any openings the loaf might have. You can fill your meatloaf with whatever you fancy. A good way to start is 4 to 5 ounces of frozen chopped spinach, defrosted and squeezed dry. Spinach can be combined with any cheese (mozzarella is fun). Try sauteed mushrooms and green peppers. Go crazy, use corn mixed with a couple of spoonfuls of salsa, and call it “Southwestern”. A row of peeled hard-boiled eggs would be very French. Serve while wearing a beret. A stuffed meatloaf has so many possibilities, no one is stopping you and will earn you endless accolades.

Tiny Little Balls of Meatloaf or as I call them - Meatballs.

Take your same basic meatloaf base and shape the mixture into 1½ inch size balls and bake on a cookie sheet for 20-25 minutes at 400 degrees. You can line the cookie sheet with foil or parchment paper for easier cleanup. If your base mixture feels too wet to shape nicely, add a couple of tablespoons more of breadcrumbs.  These can be served on pasta with any sauce you enjoy. Premade, store-bought brown gravy has a place in this world and combined with meatballs and served on egg noodles is a guilty pleasure of mine. If you stir a little Dijon mustard and sour cream into the brown gravy you are very close to a Swedish meatball. Serve them with a scoop of lingonberry jam and pretend you are Swedish. There’s always a meatball sub to be made with those meatballs (also a grinder, hoagie, or hero) and they freeze well.

Meatloaf is an excellent basic recipe and can be adapted once you have the confidence. What are you craving? Would it fit into a meatloaf? Did you want to sneak vegetables into your family's diet? You can do this. Remember the meatloaf police aren’t at your door.

[shalpilot]

Good evening (ig)! TSYM for answers❤️‍🔥

You keep me getting one brainrot after another (you sure, you're not one of the primal gods who can control people, huh?!)

Anyway, i don't think that today's questions are going to be connected with the actual plot, probably, just your world building for ocs

1. Had anyone tried to follow and catch the runaway kids? Like, If i understood it right, Kiril's parents were if not nobels than at at least respected, so people (is it right to them like that, still confused with races. Maybe, Au Ras is right?🤔) would help them to find their son. And because they believe in reincarnation, and Kiril is told to be reincarnation of some warrior, mustn't they all be worried about disappearing of lil' guy and his friend (who is pretty good at everything)?

2. Did you know, that there is a real name which is extremely similar with Kiril's short form: Kirill (yeah, just double l)? That's name means smth like "master", "lord", "powerful" and "sun" (if i remember correctly, the last one is Persian meaning, and the first 3 - Greek). I think, it's kinda fits the theme of game

3. And now (yeah, i said that questions aren't gonna be related to the plot, but now for real), what are Kiril's hobbies and fav food? (Next few asks I'm gonna have the very based questions about his personality and stuff, so be ready)

Aaaand, yet again, thank you for your patience, art and answers🥰

hello hello! i love answering these heehee

1.) there was an effort to locate them! However, they kinda BOOKED it outta there and were very determined to not get caught- and they also left without much warning at all. There was an idea among the rest of the tribe that they'd come back eventually- "they're just kids having a phase"- so it wasn't really the most concerted effort. It's been so long that Kiril's parents aren't sure how... alive... he is, but they refuse to believe he's dead. Most think Yesui is fine and just chose to remain out adventuring and will still return someday.

2.) sun!! oh, i love that!! I'll be keeping that in mind :>

3.) Kiril's hobbies are mostly just dicking around in nature lolol! He's not like, researching plants or anything but he loves a good tramp around the woods. If he ever has free time (which is not often) he spends it getting as far away from civilization as possible. During quieter periods it's not uncommon for him to disappear for a few days and come back covered in dirt and with leaves stuck in his hair. His favorite food is any and all types of bread. Just a big fan all around. He has been spotted on several occasions just. eating an entire baguette plain as if it was the most normal thing in the world. He doesn't even slice it up or anything.

[eldritch-spouse]

Imagine Fank-E, an unstoppable force, paired with a stone-cold, awfully monotonous serious S/O (kinda like Nebul), an immovable object-

And Fank-E does everything he could possibly do to try and make them fucking smile for once--

And he manages it one day and he just bluescreens from how excited he is at the sight of them smiling and they're like "what the fuck"

Fank-e loves his resting bitchface partner so much, it's unreal.

Everyone would think that the robot would ignore your existence. You're super ordinary. Just a random person, the type who only ever wears jeans and a plain shirt, no accessories, no intricate hairstyle, no makeup. You follow normal trends and have mundane interests, with no strong beliefs. But, most of all, nobody can pinpoint your humor, amusing you is seemingly impossible. And yet, Fank-e talks about you as if you're the best thing since sliced bread. It's impressive.

Everyday he tries something different. Puns, gross-out humor, morbid jokes, nonsensical memes, accident humor, high-brow stuff- He's ever determined, because something ought to do it. All things considered, the robot probably earns a soft chuckle from you unintentionally. Not only does he reboot from overwhelming excitement, he makes sure to play the Playstation 2 boot up sound when he comes back online, if only just to see if that'll make you laugh too.

That being said, he prepared for the occasion, so you're getting showered in confetti poppers. Yes, Fank-e did, in fact, have those lying in his abdominal storage space for a looooong time.

[ciaossu-imagines]

From day 16 of the event, I used number 56 from prompt 5 for the Sanzo-Ikkou from Saiyuki! These were such fun things to think about, something I would honestly never have thought about otherwise, and it was interesting to think about such mundane little things for the characters, to flesh them out just a bit more. I hope you’ll enjoy, my loves!

What do you like on your toast?

Sanzo, if toast was part of the cuisine of his everyday life, would definitely actually be rather partial to it both for breakfast and as a late-night or bedtime snack. Toast is nice and simple while being filling and it can be topped in a variety of ways so that you don’t grow sick of it.

With Sanzo, he’s definitely someone who is finicky about how toasted the bread has to be though. He doesn’t like ‘lightly toasted’, where it’s basically just warm and soft bread. He also will plain out refuse to eat toast that is burnt or too hard. It needs to be that perfect in between where the toast is golden brown with no black or super dark spots, just crispy enough to feel right but not rock hard.

Sanzo does switch up what he eats on his toast. He thinks there’s no way you can go wrong with just plain buttered toast, of course, but that gets boring after a while. He’ll also sometimes eat toast with just mayo on it like the weirdo he is. He’s not a fan of sweet jams and such, but he does like molasses on buttered toast when he’s in the mood for something sweeter.

Goku loves food. He’s not really a picky eater, with there being very few things he won’t eat. He loves toast, though it’s not normally what he chooses for breakfast. If someone makes him some though, he’s going to be really happy and will gladly eat it. It’s just that he doesn’t find that it fills him up enough to have as an actual meal.

He likes it at a middle stage in between warm bread but a little less than perfectly golden brown. He really gets into trying different toppings on top of his toast. He doesn’t prefer just plain butter since there’s a whole world out there full of things to put on toast. He likes toast topped with mayo and tomatoes. Bacon sandwiches made out of a couple slices of buttered toast and some bacon? Much better than just plain buttered toast. He’s a bit of a child and would definitely love cinnamon sugar toast and fairy toast both.

Hakkai doesn’t mind toast, but it’s not something he goes out of his way to make. It’s very, very rare for him to resort to toast as a meal or a snack. It’s actually because he tends to prefer just plain bread, without it being toasted. He loves fresh baked bread, topped with creamy butter and some sort of sweet fruit jam, probably made by Hakkai himself.

Gojyo doesn’t actually like toast all that much at all. It’s not something he thinks to make for himself, but if someone else makes it for him and it’s all that’s possibly available, he’ll eat it. He’s just not a huge fan of the plainness of the meal.

When he does eat toast, he actually prefers it just a little bit burnt. Not like, smoking and completely charred, but some burnt bits here and there makes it taste better to him, because there’s a stronger flavour.

Because he does find toast plain, Gojyo tends to rely heavily on toppings to give it flavour. I do think he’s a peanut butter man all the way and prefers crunchy peanut butter.

If he wants something sweet, he’s a honey on buttered toast kind of guy and actually might enjoy trying out the different varieties of honey to see if there’s actually a flavour difference between them.