#calm down and cook

[calmdownandcook]

Calm Down and Cook Every Single Meatloaf

Basic meatloaf should be in everyone’s “recipes I know without looking up the actual recipe” collection. It opens the doorway to so much more and it strangely impresses everyone. Meatloaf is really just the evolution of Country Pâté (also known as Terrine De Campagne). Fancy! It is also the dish I order to judge the quality of a diner (just like I judge Mexican restaurants by their salsa). But Meatloaf is also something so easy to make at home. A meatloaf dinner also sets the stage for a meatloaf sandwich the next day, and who doesn’t love that? Meatloaf can even evolve into meatballs and then into Swedish Meatballs (so you don’t have to find yourself an Ikea).

Meatloaf can be made from almost any ground meat, eggs, and a few breadcrumbs. The seasoning can be any flavor profile or nationality that is ringing your bells at the moment. There was a trend of packaged dry Onion Soup mix instead of salt and pepper. Still a traditional and solid option. I think everyone has a packet of taco seasoning in the back of their spice cabinet, perfect time to use it. Meatloaf can be served hot or cold. It can be stuffed with almost anything, from cheese to pickles, to asparagus. Your friends will think you won the James Beard Award for Best Chef. Don’t be afraid. You’re in charge, not the meatloaf. Meat “loaf” can be done in a loaf pan or, if you prefer the crispy outside bits, shape it free form on a baking dish in an oval shape. I can remember my Mom once forming a meatloaf in a heart shape on Valentine's Day. I thought she was a magician. 

This is what meatloaf can do for you. What can you do for meatloaf? Here is a basic recipe that can be used as a springboard for endless variations. 

Basic Meatloaf

2 pounds ground meat.

1 egg

½ small onion (finely chopped)

3/4 cup milk

1 cup plain dried bread crumbs

1 teaspoon of Salt 

½ teaspoon of pepper 

½ cup of Any BBQ sauce

Instructions:

Let's start with the base. Combine all the ingredients except the BBQ sauce in a large bowl. Mix until it is evenly combined, this is your meatloaf base, your basic meatloaf. Shape the mixture into an oval loaf on a greased baking pan or in a greased loaf pan. Bake at 350°F for 45 minutes. Remove the meatloaf from the oven, spread the BBQ sauce all over the top, and bake for an additional 10-20 minutes until fully cooked (check to ensure internal temp is 165°F). Total cooking time will be about 60 minutes whether you are using the BBQ sauce or not. Allow it to rest for 10 minutes before slicing and serving.

Now, let's have fun and start coloring outside the lines:

First, why BBQ sauce? If you’re not in the mood it can be swapped out for ketchup, or sweet chili sauce, or eliminate that step completely. Not a big deal.

A basic meatloaf with 2 pounds of meat should serve 8 people. In reality, I think, it serves 6 but you should have in your head that it will serve 4 people because you are a normal human being and are going to want to have meatloaf sandwiches for lunch tomorrow. 

Any ground meat will work so look in your freezer. You can use 100% ground beef or go with the classic combination of beef, pork, and veal. If you struggle with veal that's Ok. Skip it and use 50% beef and 50% pork. On the other extreme, venison is also a tasty choice and gives a slightly gamey taste. If you want to try 100% ground pork here’s a tasty idea: stir in ½ of a finely chopped apple into the meatloaf base. Just remember, you’ll need a total of 2 pounds of meat. But this can be plus or minus. 2 ½ pounds is fine, just remember you will need another 15 minutes of cooking. The same goes with using only 1 ½ pounds of meat. The cooking time will be about 15 minutes less. Check the internal temperature with a thermometer and look for 165 degrees. Kitchen thermometers are a lot more accessible, affordable, and a solid purchase. They are a great tool to have and will give you the confidence to experiment with basic recipes.

If you decide to use ground Chicken or Turkey you will see that it is “wetter” than other ground meat so you will want to increase your breadcrumbs to a total of 1½ cups. Chicken and Turkey can also be very lean. A good solution for this is to lay a few slices of bacon across the top (also, because it’s bacon) as this will add fat and flavor, a couple of pats of butter along the top works nicely too.

Herbs: fresh or dried. Do you have a favorite herb? A teaspoon of dried or a tablespoon of chopped fresh is a great way to experiment with taste. Something as simple as chives and parsley will go a long way to flavoring your base. If you are using ground lamb, try rosemary.

Of course store bought breadcrumbs can also be replaced with homemade crumbs from leftover stale bread (I do not throw things away lightly). Tear the stale bread into 2-inch chunks and pulse in a food processor. “Pulse” is when you turn your processor on and off several times so you can really chop something up finely without it turning into a paste. Make a bunch of crumbs all at once and freeze the leftovers for another use.

If you only have “Italian” breadcrumbs then, maybe skip the salt because that comes already salted. Are you all about the Italian-flavored bread crumbs? Try adding flavors that will enhance that profile. A little dried oregano, garlic powder, crushed garlic, and a pinch of hot pepper flakes are great. Any or all of these can work. A ½ teaspoon of each work but you go with your intuition, you can add more or less. Parmesan cheese (up to ½ cup) is an easy addition if you have some lurking in the back of your fridge.

Now, open your horizons and truly look around your kitchen. Do you have any vegetables that are moments away from the compost pile? Chopped them up well. They can go in the meatloaf base and stretch the dish in a very inexpensive way (just don’t use more than 25% chopped vegetables in the mix. If you do, the meat will lose its ability to hold its shape and the loaf falls apart.). My Mom would do this with sad floppy carrots, celery, and mushrooms. These all work well and add to the flavor.

Next, stuffed meatloaf. If you go this route, you are going to want to add 10 minutes to the initial cooking time and make it 55 minutes. Take about  ⅔  of whatever meatloaf base you decide to make and lay it on your baking sheet or loaf pan (whatever you are using). Form a trough (trench, channel, hollow) down the middle with your fingertips. Spoon in your filling and then use the remaining ⅓ of your base to close it up. Once this is done, dip your hands in some cold water and smooth and close any openings the loaf might have. You can fill your meatloaf with whatever you fancy. A good way to start is 4 to 5 ounces of frozen chopped spinach, defrosted and squeezed dry. Spinach can be combined with any cheese (mozzarella is fun). Try sauteed mushrooms and green peppers. Go crazy, use corn mixed with a couple of spoonfuls of salsa, and call it “Southwestern”. A row of peeled hard-boiled eggs would be very French. Serve while wearing a beret. A stuffed meatloaf has so many possibilities, no one is stopping you and will earn you endless accolades.

Tiny Little Balls of Meatloaf or as I call them - Meatballs.

Take your same basic meatloaf base and shape the mixture into 1½ inch size balls and bake on a cookie sheet for 20-25 minutes at 400 degrees. You can line the cookie sheet with foil or parchment paper for easier cleanup. If your base mixture feels too wet to shape nicely, add a couple of tablespoons more of breadcrumbs.  These can be served on pasta with any sauce you enjoy. Premade, store-bought brown gravy has a place in this world and combined with meatballs and served on egg noodles is a guilty pleasure of mine. If you stir a little Dijon mustard and sour cream into the brown gravy you are very close to a Swedish meatball. Serve them with a scoop of lingonberry jam and pretend you are Swedish. There’s always a meatball sub to be made with those meatballs (also a grinder, hoagie, or hero) and they freeze well.

Meatloaf is an excellent basic recipe and can be adapted once you have the confidence. What are you craving? Would it fit into a meatloaf? Did you want to sneak vegetables into your family's diet? You can do this. Remember the meatloaf police aren’t at your door.

[mattsmithisweirdlyhot]

I love you all, but this is just a silly little dragon show about silly little characters (played by brilliant actors who barely remember their scripts after filming) living their silly little arcs (written by writers who are clearly fucking around and having a grand old time). It really is not that serious.

[waitineedaname]

I was thinking about the trope of characters gaining weight to indicate healing/character growth, and I realized how well that would fit Shen Qingqiu

Qing Jing Peak's food is apparently bland, and I doubt Shen Jiu was eating for the joy of it. He probably only ate enough to keep himself alive and supplemented it with inedia, so the guy was probably pretty gaunt under all those layers of robes. Then Shen Yuan shows up and in very quick succession gets a fantasy chronic illness and access to The Protagonist's Cooking™️ and gets to live a pretty spoiled life for several years. He probably keeps himself relatively fit to retain the peak lord image, but he definitely gains some weight in the years following his transmigration. His face filling out probably worked wonders when it comes to softening his image compared to Shen Jiu's rather severe presence. Luo Binghe, with his trauma with regards to food insecurity, probably thrived getting to see his Shizun looking well fed and healthy

And then the Immortal Alliance Conference and everything that came after it. As much as he'd like to deny it, he is fucking Depressed™️ after all that. What's the point of eating Qing Jing's bland food when he doesn't have the protagonist's cooking anymore? So he returns to Shen Jiu's pattern of inedia

Can you imagine how Luo Binghe felt seeing how skinny his Shizun became in his absence? And of course, that gaunt version of Shen Qingqiu is the one whose corpse he preserved for five years, stuck in that hungry state. It doesn't escape me that he was always bringing a meal to corpsezun's bedside so on the off chance that he came back, the first thing he could do was eat Binghe's cooking

Basically what I'm saying is if you compare post-canon bingqiu to their PIDW counterparts, the most striking difference on first glance is that Bingge and Shen Jiu are skinny and rangy and miserable, and Bingmei and Shen Yuan are happy and healthy and well fed

[hasello]

Baby Blue (24/25)

first/previous/next

"Leo actually cries. They both probably do, although he's not even sure. He's hugging his dad and nothing else matters." - here's my notes for these pages, because I feel they have a special vibe to them, which I just couldn't put into the comic.

[ineed-to-sleep]

*me immediately after going through a terrifying and traumatic experience* haha yeah I guess it was rough but I'm fine now like I'm totally chill. It was kinda funny actually if you think about it

[nelkcats]

Danny's Pizzeria

Ghosts get bored, a lot, and sometimes even Ghost Kings get ideas from their videogames in childhood. So, when Lunch Lady commented that she didn't have enough ingredients to cook for a "half human" (read, him) the halfa traveled to another dimension and gave them to her without much trouble.

Then Lunch said that she wanted to experiment, and he got her new ingredients, from all possible places (always asking Clockwork if it really was edible).

The funny thing was that several ghosts wanted to try the new "pizza" flavors that the King had been enjoying. So he just opened a pizzeria in the Realms. The thing is, the ingredients cost money, and while he could pawn the gold from the vault, Clockwork told him that he shouldn't leave "haunted" materials everywhere.

So he just expanded his pizzeria to various dimensions. The menu sounded strange anywhere outside of the Realms, with the most exotic ingredients. But he needed money, and it was the simplest way that didn't include bewitching an unsuspecting poor man.

Of course he, along with other ghosts made the deliveries (it depended on who wanted to travel, mostly Johnny and Kitty). Pizzerias just popped up at any moment before disappearing (even though his business was doing fine online) simply because he thought disappearing buildings was fun.

No wonder Billy Batson freaked out when he noticed the pizzeria next to the Rock of Eternity. That John Constantine fainted when he saw it next to the House of Mystery or that the Watchtower investigated the establishment that had appeared on the Moon (Of course, Flash ordered). But hey, the ghost king need some kind of entertainment.

[aanalytic]

happy The Gang Tends Bar day, y’all!!

individual versions of each card, for your Valentine purposes, below the cut :,)

[approximately-32-leafcutter-ants]

making soup at 10pm

[cyanide-sippy-cup]

Oh, a new TADC episode. Why didn't I get notified? Eh, whatever. Can't wait to watch-

GOOSE WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO MY HEART

[breawycker]

It's 4:36 AM and I can't sleep so I'm just gonna post this dumb wenclair thing I just came up with when I was trying to fall asleep.

Okay so like when Enid comes back after they have that falling out Wednesday says “Thing missed you” and Enid replies “I missed him too.” Cause like they can't express their feelings for each other because they're scared so they use Thing as a proxy and in the end they're like “Thing loves you” or “Thing says he loves you” and then Enid is like “I love him too” and they kiss because they know exactly what they mean and Thing is just completely confused. Like Wednesday will say “Thing says you look nice today” and Enid will be like “tell him thank you” or Enid will be like “Thing says your cello playing is beautiful” and as it keeps up they realize that the other feels the same as they do. Like they slowly escalate it until we reach that kiss.

Here's an example I came up with:

Wednesday: Thing says you look nice today

Enid: what else does Thing think about me?

Wednesday: he thinks you're too good for that brainless stoner, Ajax.

Enid: Really. Does he have any other boyfriends in mind?

Wednesday: he wonders if it has to be a “boy"friend 

Enid: tell him I'm open to other suggestions 

Wednesday: he wonders perhaps another girl?

Enid: does he have a girl in mind?

Wednesday: he does but he wonders if she'd be good enough for you. He thinks you're special for some reason. 

Enid: perhaps he should tell this girl to meet me in the cemetery tonight at 8

Wednesday: he says that's perfect grave digging time

Enid: well I was hoping for a picnic too

Wednesday: he thinks that can be arranged as well

Enid: tell him it's a date

Wednesday: I'm sure he'll be thrilled to hear.

Thing, signing: what are you two fucking talking about?

[it-wasntaphase]

guys what have dnp been eating lately because everyday i wake up to another major development and i can’t handle this much longer

[calmdownandcook]

Upside Down Cakes

This is the cake that decorates itself

Pineapple? Yep! Blueberries? Got it! What about rhubarb? This is the cake that decorates itself and goes with the flow as far as seasons are concerned. Look to the upside-down cake when you have some glorious fruit but not enough to make a pie. The cake is basically a dense pound cake base and the fruit is whatever calls to you. Old-school pineapple is always nice, fresh, or canned. You could even be hardcore retro and put a maraschino cherry in the middle of the pineapple rings, but let's take a moment and see what happens when you step out of the box and use whatever fruit you want. To begin, choose your fruit. You could even select 2 or 3 fruits. The size and style of your fruit will be determined by how soft or firm you want it to be in the end. The larger the piece, the firmer the bite. Berries will almost always cook down to a jam but should retain their shape. There are no rules to this except for “whatever you want”. For example, I will peel apples or pears but prefer not to peel peaches (it's a pain in the butt). I like to cut the apples, pears, and peaches into 8 wedges because they can be fanned out and I think it's pretty. You can also cut them into 1-inch chunks and form patterns - or just dump them in the bottom and spread them evenly. Frozen cherries are a nice and easy choice but they have to be totally defrosted and patted dry. Cranberries are “holiday-ish” and look so pretty; the only effort is sprinkling them in the bottom of the pan with the sugar. Remember, if you use cranberries, like any tart fruit,  you should increase the sugar you sprinkle under the fruit from 1/4 cup to ½  cup. Take your imagination further by swapping up to ¼ cup of your fruit measurement for any nuts. Walnuts or almonds are nice with almost anything. You can even add in chopped candied Ginger. This is also very nice around the holidays. Embrace your love of citrus all year round by using oranges or lemons. If you slice them paper thin you don’t have to peel them. The peels will “candy” in the sugar sprinkled on the bottom.

Let’s Make A Cake

The Fruit (the bottom and then the top of your cake)

2 cups of fruit (whatever you choose), 

3 tablespoons melted butter,

1/4  cup sugar (increase to ½  if you are using rhubarb, cranberry, or lemons, yes, lemons)

The Cake

1 cup unsalted butter - softened

2 cups granulated sugar

3 large room-temperature whole eggs

3 large room-temperature egg yolks

1 Tablespoon vanilla extract

1/2 teaspoon salt

2  cups all-purpose flour

Instructions

Preheat your oven to 350F (175C) 

For the fruit part, generously grease (with shortening or spray) a 10-inch springform pan. Cut out a circular piece of parchment or foil to line the bottom of the baking pan. Place the parchment (or foil) in the pan. Pour the 3 tablespoons of melted butter onto the parchment, and roll around to distribute evenly. Then, sprinkle the ¼ cup of the sugar that goes with your fruit on top making sure to get it evenly distributed. This will end up on top of what you lined the pan with. (Parchment or aluminum foil). Take the fruit you chose and spread it across the bottom of your pan. You can toss it in half haphazardly, as long as you evenly distribute it across the bottom, or you can arrange it like a beautiful mosaic. Just try to keep the fruit in a single layer. 

Now for the base cake, the key is scraping down the bowl. Be meticulous and take your time when instructed to do so. Place your butter in a large bowl (this recipe makes a lot of batter)! I recommend using a stand mixer if you have one or an electric mixer, beat the butter until it is creamy, smooth, and lightened in color.

Scrape down the sides of the bowl and add the sugar. Beat until the ingredients are well combined, again, light and fluffy (about 2 minutes).

Combine your eggs and egg yolks in a separate, medium-sized bowl. Then add 1 tablespoon vanilla extract, and ½  teaspoon salt to your egg mixture. Use a fork or a whisk to lightly beat the eggs and yolks until all egg yolks are completely broken up and salt and vanilla are incorporated.

With the mixer on low speed, slowly pour the egg mixture into your batter, allowing it to gradually become incorporated. Once the egg mixture is incorporated, pause to scrape down the sides and bottom of the bowl, then increase speed to medium-high and beat for another 2 minutes. Reduce mixer speed to low and gradually add flour to the batter, about ½  cup at a time until all flour has been added. When you no longer see dry flour, scrape down the sides and bottom of the bowl and mix again on medium speed until the batter is a little fluffier, about another minute.

Spread batter evenly and lightly into the prepared pan over the fruit and use a spatula to gently smooth the surface of the batter. Try not to disturb the fruit. Wrap the outside of the pan in aluminum foil on the small chance there is any leaking juice. Transfer to a 350F oven and bake on the center rack for 80-90 minutes or until a wooden skewer inserted in the center of the thickest part of the cake comes out clean or ideally with a few moist crumbs. This is a long cooking time but it is a big dense cake with lots of fruit.

Allow the cake to cool for at least 30 minutes and then run a knife around the sides (do an excellent job of this so removal will be easy). Don’t let the cake cool any more than this because the sugar on the bottom will harden and will make removal very difficult. Flip on a plate but be wary, the melted sugar and butter you placed on the bottom of the pan will be freakishly hot. Remove the parchment or foil if it turns out with the cake. If any fruit remains stuck to the bottom of the pan, don’t let it break your heart, you can stick them back into the top of your cake and no one will be the wiser.

Make the cake you want.

Don’t let a recipe boss you around. Did you go to H Mart and buy a can of lychee nuts? This would work. Here’s a brief rundown of things to inspire you.

Any orchard fruit is nice and a good opportunity to make a design if sliced into wedges.

Berries are easy but remember to not make too thick of a layer they can lose their shape at the end of cooking.

Bananas work but can be brown and mushy (sorry, I banana-shamed). They are, however, delicious when paired with walnuts.

Rhubarb is one you’d want to increase the sugar that is initially sprinkled in the pan to ½  cup. Arrange in spokes to impress your friends with your artistic talent.

A fig, cut in half, and placed face down is one of the best you could hope for.

Apricots are tasty but often expensive, try canned ones. If the canned ones come in halves, slice them into wedges.

Avoid super watery fruits like any melon or something like a Kiwi. It will water down your cake batter and not necessarily taste good cooked.

Avocados and Tomatoes are fruit but don’t be a weirdo and try these.

A scoop of vanilla ice cream or whipped cream can cover up any craziness that has gone wrong in the fruit pattern. The cake part of this recipe is very straightforward and the fruit is where you get a chance to shine. There are, however, some fun things you can do with the cake batter to turn up the flavor by adding some simple things. Try adding one or two of these flavors during the final mix of the cake. You can add 1 teaspoon of Almond Extract or 1 tablespoon of lemon or orange zest. A splash (2 tablespoons) of rose water can be very exotic. For some spice, try adding 1 teaspoon of cinnamon, 1 teaspoon of ground ginger, and or ½ teaspoon of Cardamom (my favorite). 

Shake off the “pineapple” part of a Pineapple Upside Down Cake. You don’t need a ton of fruit and I hope you find this empowering. You are the decider, you are in control.

Mea culpa-

The first time I made this cake for the photo (blueberries and raspberries), I forgot to do the step where you sprinkle the sugar on the bottom of the pan. The cake was fine, maybe not as shiny and pretty, and definitely not as sweet. BUT it was fine. Not the end of the world. Anything you bake and get cake in the end is an achievement.

[strawberrystepmom]

Kendall :(((( mid-forties husband gojo who still teases & flirts with you each day :((( never looses his boyish charm :((((

meeting up with the kids who are now fully grown with their own lives and dreams and children (some of them!) and they’re like he looks at you the exact same way he did back then :((((((((((((( what if I perish

[hemaris]

that soup post has bewitched me body and soul now i can't stop thinking about soup i wanna make soup soooooo bad. at midnight

[ardentpoop]

we cry because your “legitimate votes” (absolutely bizarre concern) are indicative of an audience with astoundingly shit taste and even more shit media literacy hope this clears things up for you

if I could completely block out everything the broader fandom had to say abt any of these characters I’d do it in a heartbeat but unfortunately the whole structure is rotten

[windlullaby-arts]

Seeing both jjk and mha leaks back to back today made my cry so hard for very different reasons