#nobody talks like that about Dai !!!! 😡😡😡

[smuthospital]

⭐️Yandere Gojo x reader⭐️

Premise: You're so lonely, and your boyfriend isn't paying any attention to you, so you download an app to make friends. You meet the wrong guy (Gojo), and bad things happen.

Content warning: NON CON, Cheating, gn reader

MINORS DNI

"I'm busy right now and you know that. I told you not to call me!" The phone beeps and the call ends, leaving you alone in deafening silence. Your boyfriend has always been rough around the edges, but you love him despite his flaws. He has his moments that remind you why you like him so much. Lately, he's been busy with all sorts of things. Work, family, his hobbies. You live together, but he's always out. He doesn't even return at night sometimes. You understand he needs his alone time, but it's been so long since you've seen him. You called to ask if you could visit him at work and give him a little surprise. You baked him chocolate chip cookies! They're delicious and made with love. Tears prick your eyes as you toss your phone to the side. You're so lonely. You've never had many friends, just your boyfriend. Too many people just make you tired.

You pick up your phone and almost call him again out of reflex. You just wish you had someone to talk to again. You saw an advertisement for a popular friend making app awhile ago. You decide to download it because you don't have much to lose. search it up. You write a few things about yourself, add your favorite song as well as a few pictures of yourself. You cross your fingers, hoping not to match any creeps. You swipe right on a lot of girls aswell as guys. You stated in your bio that you're in a commited relationship to ward off any horny guys. Girls don't reply to you, much to your disappointment. You end up getting quite a lot of messages from flirty guys. The relationship warning seemed to have no affect at all.

Toji: How much for a pair of pantys?

Sukuna: (Sent a photo) *Blocked*

Todo: I know it grips. Please lemme hit

25 new messages!

Geez. It's only been an hour. These guys are like hungry raccoons and you feel like a can of cat food. You scroll through and see one that looks relatively innocent

Gojo: Hey :)

You: Hello!

Gojo: What's up? I saw that you have a cat! They're so cute! Also, you're gorgeous

You: Thank you! That's my lil baby right there

You and him quickly get along. Still no word from your boyfriend, you sigh, defeated. The cookies can wait. You tell him about your boyfriend and how you never see him that much anymore. Be seems to take interest in this and becomes quite upset that you're not treated with the love you deserve. You friendship goes on for a few days. He occasionally trys to flirt with you, but you quickly shut it down each time, politely asking him to respect your boundaries. His nickname for you is gorgeous and although it makes you a bit uncomfortable, it feels too good to hear for you to ask him to stop. He's your only friend at the moment so you really don't want to make him go away.

You: Still no reply from my boyfriend. I hope he's okay.

Gojo: What the fuck. If I had a girl like you, I'd never leave her alone. He's probably cheating

You: What? He'd never. He's not like that!

Gojo: Trust me, I'm a guy, I know. Just look at the way he treats you. You're such a sweet and polite doll and he's making you feel this way, neglecting you. He makes you feel like shit. This is abuse😡

You: Oh it's really not like that, he's really sweet!

Gojo: There you go again...I can treat you better. Just give me one chance. Nobody has to know. You can leave this abusive relationship.

You: We talked about this, I'm have a boyfriend and I love him. Don't say stuff like that, please

Gojo: I'm just sayin

You: Thank you tho, it's sweet that you care. Do you like cookies? I was saving these for my boyfriend, but he's too busy to receive them. They'll go to waste if they're not eaten

Gojo: YES. SEND THE COOKIES. You wanna come over tomorrow? I know you're free. Come to my place, we can watch movies and cuddle with cookies!

You: What!? I can't go over to a guy's house! That's weird! And cuddle!?

Gojo: Nono it's not. We're just friends. And your boyfriend doesn't have to know. It's not a big deal. I have some old wine we can drink. Pretty please

You: I don't drink tho. I'm not sure. I haven't known you for too long. What if you try to take my kidneys! :0

Gojo: Common..would I do that!?? Ridiculous. Don't over think it. Let's watch a scary movie. It'll be real scary. I can't watch it alone! Pleeeeaaase!!!

You: ...Ok...as long as its scary. I wouldn't want you to get too scared

You've never seen Gojo in person, but you're sort of desperate to keep him around as a friend. In his photos, his eyes are covered. You don't question why. You step off the bus at the address he texted you, cookie basket in hand. It's a tall, expensive looking condo. You walk into the nice building and spot him leaning against a wall you in the lobby. He's not what you expected at all. You've seen a pictures of him before, but he didn't look so large and intimidating. He's stupid tall and He practically towers over your frame. He crouches slightly and wraps his arms around you in a tight hug, surprising you with the sudden contact.

"Hey, (y/n)! It's nice to see you in person! You're so much more sexy up close." His voice as soft satin sheets and deep and melodic as a cat purring. He eyes you up and down, his eyes half lidded. He's snapped out of his trance when you stutter a confused thank you. You're gonna brush that flirt off as nothing. "Common, let's go." He takes your soft, smaller hand in his ridiculously big hand and leads you to a fancy elevator and sticks a key into a key hole, confusing you. Since when do elevators do that? "The 21sr floor is mine." The whole floor is his? Is he loaded?

The whole time, you're blushing and stuttering, overly shy and nervous. 'Play it cool,(y/n)!' Your mind is over heating and he thinks it's absolutely adorable. When you get to his floor, he closes the door and silently locks it behind him. He plops on the couch, spreads his long legs out and patts the spot next to him. "Common! Take a seat!" You gingerly take a seat a little too far for his liking so he loops an arm around your waist and pulls you closer. You jump a bit. "Oh don't be shy! I don't bite." The last part of his sentence stood out to you a bit, but you're not sure why.

He offers you a drink and you accept. He hands you a cup of soda. "The conjuring is a classic. I actually haven't seen it before so I thought we could watch it." With that, he presses play and the movie starts. You're both eating the cookies you made. "These are so fucking good. You made these?" He whispers and you nod. Your blushing cheeks are so cute. He's already eaten three. It's heartwarming. Halfway into the movie, he shuffles in his seat and surprises you by picking you up and placing you on his lap with ease. "Hey! What are you doing!?" You try to slide off, but he holds you in place. "Hey hey calm down, I'm not doing anything!" You stop thrashing, but don't stop struggling. "Oh yeah!? Let me off, you said no funny buissness!" You feel slightly tired for some reason. "I'm only trying to cuddle you better! If not for me, then for you. I bet you miss being cuddled. I know you already have a boyfriend so don't worry, there's nothing weird about it!" With that, you stop struggling, too worn out to argue. "...Mm ok." Near the end of the movie, he shifts slightly under you. "Gojo?" No response. You feel somthing hard under your ass. He starts to shift you back and fourth a bit. "Huh? Gojo?" He just keeps shifting you, holding your hips tightly. "Ow! You're squeezing me too tight. What are you doin-"

One of his hands snake up to your chest and cup your breast. The motion freezes you in place.

"I'm better than your stupid boyfriend. He's so ungreatful. I bet you also miss getting fucked, don't you?" It was more of a statement rather than a question.I can make you feel good, better than he ever did. God, you're so hot. This guy is such a loser for passing you up. I'd never be like him. I've been wanting for this since I first saw you. I know you think I'm attractive too. I see the way you eye me"

The hand holding down your hip moves between your thighs to cup your clit. You heart sinks into your stomach as the weight of the situation falls upon you. You have never felt more stupid in your entire life. Just as you suck in a breath to scream, the hand on your breast shoots up to cover your mouth, muffling any sound. You try to slsp his hands off, but your arms are a little weaker than before. All you could do was patt his arms and wiggle around, which he completely ignores.

"Ah ah-be good. I couldn't stop thinking of you. I've only known you for a bit, but that's enough for me." He grinds his clothed cock against your ass and groans in pleasure.

After a few minutes, he stands up with you in his arms and walks with you to his bedroom. He tosses you on his bed and immediately gets on top, holding you down with his hips as he removs his shirt. He looks down at your horrified face and licks his lips. He wastes no time in literally ripping your shirt and bra off. You hear the tear as it leaves you. With one hand, he roughly palms your chest and tweaks a nipple. He unzips his dark purple pants with his other hand, his swollen cock practically flying out and slamming down above your belly button. You gasp at the sight of it, the weight alone is hefty. Much like his entire self, it's big and scary.

Your eyes fill with tears and you do the only think you could. Your body can't possibly struggle and even if you could, he could easily over power you. "Please-please don't hurt me. Please don't do this to me!" He looks at you with sympathy in his eyes. "Shh it's ok. I'd never hurt you. I'm not like your stupid boyfriend. I'm gonna make you feel good. Then you'll be mine..I see that drug I have you fully kicked in." You pail at his words. It's over. You're not getting out of this one. You're going to be raped by this psychopath. You think of your poor boyfriend. You wish he could burst through the door and save you. His name bubbles from your mouth pathetically.

"Speaking of him." Gojo slides your phone out of your pocket and clicks around. First, he disables your location, then he raises your phone and takes a photo of you. He quickly sends it to himself and your boyfriend.

You: We're having a good time. Bet you're jealous

A few minutes of groping later, your boyfriend responds.

❤️Geto❤️: Absolutely not. You're both disgusting. I fucking knew you were whoring yourself. You got a big head because you think you're pretty. I was wondering why you were trying to look nice recently.

❤️Geto❤️: You're like a bitch in heat. You're just an easy, worthless whore. Glad I didn't waste too much on you.

❤️Geto❤️: Go fuck yourself. Or better yet, have some guy do it for free. Get aids and die, bitch. You have a day to pick up all your shit before I toss it.

(You've been blocked by this number)

Gojo turns the screen towards you and your eyes tear up as you read the texts. You have no idea how your boyfriend could have possibly interpreted your situation as consentual. It could be that you're not tied up and gagged, nor unconscious. As he said, he expected this from you. Either way, he obviously doesn't love you anymore. Tears pour down your cheeks. How could he? After all this time? To do this to you. You'd never cheat! Your heart shatters in your chest, suddenly feeling hollow.

Gojo chuckles and sets the phone to the side. He wipes your tears away with his thumb. "See? What did I tell you? He was never the one for you. I'd never say that to you, sweety. I'd never treat you like that. I just exposed him for what he is; a scum bag." He tugs your pants down and off your legs with ease, despite your light kicking. A large grin on his face as he does so

"You ready?" He positions his cock at your dry entrance and laughs. "Because I am." He shoves himself in, but only makes it three inches in before he hits a barrier and you gasp in pain and start thrashing your body. "P-please take it out. It-it hurts!" He's genuinely shocked. "Y-you're a virgin? Didn't you say you have a boyfriend?"

You wiggle a bit, trying to elevate some pain yourself before answering him.

"We never...you..know.." Your face burns with shame. His cock only seems to swell with more blood at the news.

He bursts out laughing. "This makes so much sense now! No wonder why you looked elsewhere to fulfill your needs. He doesn't want to fuck. Is he gay?Does his dick even work? Maybe he's not cheating. He didn't even fuck you once. I could tell how bad you wanted it, but your limp dick boyfriend wouldn't give you any. I'm glad to be the one to have your first time."

Your bloodshot eyes drift to the side. You don't want to admit that he was right. Every time you would try to start something with your boyfriend, he'd push you away. Your boyfriend really didn't have much of a labido, but you didn't look for friends to have sex with other men.

"I know it hurts, but you can take it. It'll go away. Just hold still...or struggle. I like a challenge." His words are evil, but his smile is so charming. He's like the devil. He pulls his cock out and thrusts in again, deeper than before, breaking your hymen and forcing the air to leave your body. He then pulls out and slams into you again, bottoming out. His cock is so big, you swear you could feel it in your stomach. You look down, eyes blown wide as you see an imprint of his cock in your lower abdomen. He lets out a loud moan and throws his head back. "You're so fucking tight." You put your hands on his chest, hoping that would be enough to keep him still. Wishful thinking. He just takes your smaller wrists in his large hands and leans over you, lodging himself deeper than he was before, cock assaulting your cervix, making your body jolt. You accidentally let out a pained cry that could be mistaken as a moan.

Gojo smiles, perfect white teeth on display "Oh, you like that?" He slams into that spot again and again, making your eyes roll into the back of your head, and your tongue rolls out of your mouth. Lewd sounds spill from your mouth with the occasional "No." "Please." and "Stop." Your sobbing dies down, not having any more tears to cry. You feel a tightening in your lower belly and curl your toes. "Nng G-Gojo!"

"Fuck yeah, say my name!" He pounds into your poor pussy with astonishing speed and strength. "Say you'll be my girlfriend. I can take care of you, I can love you. You'll never feel alone again."

Your face flushes red at his words. Those words are all you need to tip over the edge. You aren't sure if he meant it or not, but just the thought of being so loved takes you to cloud nine. A warm feeling washes over you and you cry out in pleasure. You want what he promised more than anything in the world. With your last braincell, you weigh your options. Nobody loves you, you have nowhere to go, no one to turn to and Your boyfriend kicked you out. "I...I'll be with you." What choice did you have? Be homeless?

The bashful look you give him sends shivers down his spine. He leanes down and gives you a tender kiss on the lips which you very hesitantly return, much to his enjoyment. His hot breath tickles your face as his hips hammer into you, forcing cute music from your mouth for him. Your cunt tightening impossibly around his thick mass. His pace becoming sloppy and before you could ask him to pull out, he shoves himself deep within you one last time. With a lewd moan he fills your tummy up with his seed. Your eyes cross at the warm, pleasurable sensation. The feeling of being filled up like a puff pastry, his hot creamy cum temporarly stupifying you. Your tummy now bloated by the sheer volume. He takes another picture.

He wasn't looking for a girlfriend, but how could he possibly deny himself such a sweet little thing. A sweet, doting, cookie baking girlfriend as cute as you comes as often as a shooting star. You'd do anything for the man you loved. Too wifey to pass up. Finders keepers. He's going to make sure that no one ever does to you what he just did to you. You're his now.

He rolls the two of you so he's spooning your back, your ass pressed against him, his cock still firmy lodged into your weeping cunt. He pulls the blanket up and the two of you fall asleep together. You pretty much pass out from the exhaustion.

The next morning, he drives you to your now x boyfriends appartment to collect your things. You and Gojo take the elevator to the apartment. He stays out of sight, but stays where he can hear you. You knock on the door and your Geto opens up. The smell of alcohol hits you and you gag. "Well if it isn't the slut. Get your shit."

He turns his back and begins to walk away, but you grab his arm and gently tug him toward you. "Please listen to me...he raped me...I didn't want to.. do any-" You were cut off by him shoving you to the ground roughly, your head knocking against the wall on your way down. You grunt in pain. "Don't you use that shit on me!" He shouts.

Tears fill your eyes as you scramble to collect your things and run out. Gojo is at the front door now, having heard the commotion. He steps in the apartment and grabs your shoulders.

"What's wrong? Did he touch you?"

"...I..hit my head." Your tiny voice is unconvincing.

"Take your things to the car. I'm just gonna have a quick chat with him." He pays your butt and you walk off with your things. Geto has been watching the interaction with clenched fists.

"You're the fuck that stole my girl. You can fucking have her and pass her around to whoever the fuck you want. For your information, that cunt tried to tell me you raped her, using you as her scape goat." Gojo can just barley understand the drunken shouting of your x boyfriend. Gojo smiles, the smugest of grins crossing his face.

"...That's because I did"

Geto froze in place, not believing his ears. His girlfriend..was actually just raped? And not only did he do absolutely nothing, but he kicked her out and hurt her?

"...What?" It wasn't really a question.

"Finders keepers. I have no clue why you're so upset. You didn't love her. She was so lonely when I found her. I wanted her so I took her. Make no mistake, she said no. Cried for you. You should feel like shit. Not believing your own sweet little girlfriend and then laying your hand on her in her time of need. I'm not even going to beat you for that, you'd treat yourself like a victim. Better luck next time though. Try satisfying your bitch before they're stolen. Thanks for the girlfriend." Gojo says, walking back to the car, Geto still too frozen in shock to react. He falls to his knees, clinching his head. Gojo meets you in the car, your things already in the back. He leans over to your side and gives you a passionate kiss on the lips, tongue diving into your mouth. Your face burns brightly and you cant help but kiss him back. You disconnect, a string of saliva connecting you to him. "So what do you want to eat, baby?"

The car drives off and you don't feel so bad about the situation anymore.

Fun fact: I got the idea to make this when I was lonely and my boyfriend (now x) wasn't paying attention to me so I downloaded an app to make friends and a guy I thought was my friend started being really pushy and I found out men are stupid dogs.

[httpsserene]

ʟᴇᴛ’ꜱ ɢᴏ ɢᴏʟꜰɪɴɢ ᴡ/ ʟɴ4

📖ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: maybe you shouldn’t be late to any event you go to, or bare minimum don’t make any bets you know you’re not going to win. having no hand-eye coordination is not great when you’re being forced to play golf.

📖ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: i think i’m funny. one or two dirty jokes. and reader does have a lil injury (nothing bad). not edited at all 😎

📖ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: the doc says 900 words?? it feels longer idk

📖ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: lando x black!fem!reader (it’s mainly twitch trio focused-alex,george & lando)

📖ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: smau

📖ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴛʀᴀᴄᴋ: swang • rae sremmurd

ᴘʀᴇꜰᴀᴄᴇ: i’d like to remind everyone that the people asked for this hellscape! you 🫵🏽 asked for it. it’s long, like LONG. anyways: max is definitely the type of dude to use the cat emojis. my bad to my charles girlies, he did not make the cut for this 😔 i had to get rid of like three or four ig posts and stories to make this all fit into one tblr post, and none of that had charles content 🫠. also, the plot damn near ran away from me, but it’s barely there—it’s kinda more friend focused than lando x reader until the end! uh there’s one part in here that was inspired by tik tok comments, y’all will know which one 😅 inspired by the fact that my brother hit me with a golf club when i was a child 🙂i think i’m pretty funny so i hope you guys find this funny asl, otherwise what did i do this for?

if you want me to post the outtakes lmk

send me some requests or talk to me pls 😅

want to be on a tag list? tell me in my inbox <3

georgerussell63

liked by lilymhe, mercedesamgf1, and 4,100,123 others

georgerussell63: off to a terrible start for golf day. my girlfriends “wife” is crashing the party, and my mates gf is already -4 after two holes 🙂

view comments

lilymhe: light work 💪🏼 no reaction🥱

user: not his girlfriend’s wife ☠️

➥ user: who does he think keeps carmen’s bed warm when he’s not at home???

alex_albon: welcome to watch mojo! and today we’re counting down our top 10 times our gf’s ditch us for each other 🤨

➥ user: and?

➥ user: what else are they supposed to do alexander 😀

y/ninstagram: put some respeCK on my name princling, or next time i see u its on sight 😡 im aiming the golf club straight at you

➥ georgerussell63: you can’t even hit the golf ball in under three tries, or aim anywhere near the holes

➥ georgerussell63: i think i’ll be fine

➥ y/ninstagram: 😟😐 i'll remember this george william russell, ur asking for it

carmenmmundt: george failed to mention that he’s +3 already

➥ georgerussell: like, literally nobody asked you to say that 😒

➥ landonorris: drag him !!! he doesn’t get to say shit about our wife 😤

➥ carmenmmundt: *my wife

➥ user: lmfaooo im 💀

alex_albon

liked by y/ninstagram, carmenmmundt and 3,431,543 others

alex_albon: ladies and gentlemen, introducing: *my* girlfriend 🤤✨

tagged lilymhe

view comments

y/ninstagram: we MUST stay focused sisters

y/ninstagram: gawd damn‼️ wifey could hit me with that golf club any day

➥ carmenmmundt: fuck the club, i’ll let her run me over w the cart🥴

lilymhe: next hole, i’ll show you guys what a proper stoke is 😏

➥ lilymhe: since our bf’s seem to underperform…on the golf course obv

➥ user: AYOOO?!!

➥ carmenmmundt: okay 😇

➥ y/ninstagram: why r my thighs wet rn

➥ user: dO THEY KNOW THIS IS PUBLIC

alex_albon: i’m at a loss for words

➥ landonorris: this is literally your fault

➥ georgerussell63: can’t believe you mate 🫤

➥ alex_albon: how is this MY fault??! whattddiddiddoo

lilymhe • 5hrs ago

view replies

y/ninstagram: idk y ur complaining? the cart is parked. on its side, but it’s parked😊

carmenmmundt: i think we’ve punished ourselves

alex_albon: should’ve left her ass at home like i said 😒

francisca.cgomes: idk even know why y’all let her drive the cart😨

y/ninstagram • 4 hrs ago

view replies

maxfewtrell: ur joeeee kingggg. ur joe king 😐

francisca.cgomes: i wouldn’t even trust u with the scorecard—but pop off !!! girl boss shit

danielricciardo: SO I HAD TO, GRIND LIKE THAT TO SHINE LIKE THIS 🗣️🗣️‼️💯

lando.jpg

liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri, and 3,862,431 others

lando.jpg: “i have the highest score out of everybody here! +26 up on y’all hoes!” - y/n

tagged y/ninstagram

view comments

lando.jpg: BRO SAID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING 🥶🥶🔥🔥🔥

➥ maxfewtrell: SHE SOUNDS FIRE 🔥 ON MUTE ‼️💯

lilymhe: SHE GOT A HIDDEN TALENT 🔥🔥🔥 KEEP IT HIDDEN 🔥🔥🔥

➥ alex_albon: no talent ✅ JUST STRAIGHT ASS 💯💯🗣️🗣️🔥🔥

georgerussell63: THIS IS FIRE 🔥 PUT IT OUT ‼️

user: SHE SPITTING BARS 💯💯💯 PUT HER BEHIND THEM 🔥🔥🔥

user: THE SILENCE IS SO LOUD WHEN THIS HITS 🗣️🔥🔥

user: WE STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM 🔥🔥🔥 NOW WE’RE DIGGING 🗣️🗣️🔥💯‼️🙌🏽🙌🏽

y/ninstagram: y u hurt me 😪

➥ carmenmmundt: i think you’re underrated, honestly <; 3

➥ y/ninstagram: aw ty carmie :)

➥ carmenmmundt: I HOPE IT STAYS THAT WAY 🥶🥶‼️‼️🙌🏻🙌🏻

➥ y/ninstagram: bee-eff-eff-aur: be FUCKING for real 😒

y/ninstagram • 3 hrs ago

view replies

maxverstappen1: i don’t want to laugh—man who TF am i kidding 😹😹😹

alexandrasaintmleux: how THE fuck did u manage to give yourself a concussion??!

carlossainzjr: pobrecita😪 how 😭 terrible 😭 can you tell lando to come over when ur done

carlossainzjr: hello

carlossainzjr: niña i can see you reading my messages

landonorris

liked by carlossainzjr, mclaren, and 6,234,765 others

landonorris: thank you for all the wishes about y/n (not u carlos, you’re in time out). she only has a mild concussion, and verbally assaults me when i wake her up every two hours 😒 to make sure she’s alive 🤗

view comments

landonorris: god forbid i stop her from dying 😱

➥ carlossainzjr: heyyy be nice to her she’s in another world right now

➥ landonorris: u r not slick sainz. don’t expose our affair to my gf when she’s injured

➥ carlossainzjr: she won’t even remember this 🥺

➥ user: sir👁️👄👁️, this is a wendy’s drive through

➥ user: they know this on the internet 4ever right…?

lilymhe: this girl swung the club, missed the ball, and let go of the damn club no follow through

➥ carmenmmundt: it hit the ground and ricocheted back at her

➥ alex_albon: and she got knocked on the forehead hard asl

➥ georgerussell63: the noise it made was hilarious 😂 y’all should’ve been there

➥ user: geORGE WILLIAM????

➥ georgerussell63: i’m mad we didn’t get it on video smh 😔

taglist: @saintslewis @cherry2stems

© httpsserene 2023

[yourownmabel]

I have learnt to love myself because I believe nobody can love me like myself... As long as no one gifted me on Valentine's Day, all the love y'all talk about is fake... Please stop admiring me😡

[val-cansalute]

PICKING UP THE ———- PIECES -———

ch. 1

ch. 2

ch. 3

ch. 4

ch. 5

ch. 6

a/n: short first chapter 🫤 also BORING AS FOCK but the next few will be longer and better, just stick with me cw: implied depression/ptsd, dark themes, not too heavy but please don’t read if this might trigger you, angst, no smut in this chapter but there might be some later on, creds to cafekitsune for dividers, MDNI 😡

Six months ago today, your gaunt figure limped through Jackson for the first time, arms scarred and trembling, and face adorned with a vacant expression. You’ve been here for a while now.

You heard Maria say, with time, you’d come out of your shell - actually speak to the others. But, no, you still stay holed up in your decaying room, recalling what happened that day obsessively, and only ever leaving to go on patrol. Only when you absolutely have to.

God, you don’t even know if you can call this grief anymore. Seems as though you built a nest in the sorrow. Would it still be considered missing him if you desperately want to stop seeing his face whenever you close your eyes.

Fuck, don't say that. Never say that.

Promise I still love you, big brother. Promise I'd do anything to see you again.

Well, nobody really pays you any mind; you just sink into the shadows of the shitty little apartment you've been put in. And it doesn’t matter to you because the thought of getting close to people again makes you sick anyway.

Never wanna feel this pain. Never again. Fuck, just go away, please.

I'm so sorry, Soren.

You’ve waited it out for months but, at this point, you've given up hope. Feels like maybe it’s time to go be on your own. You know it’s dumb, but you haven’t got much to live for now that he’s gone.

Late night, you crawl into the comfort of misery, chaining yourself to each painful memory; you cannot leave a single shard behind. Not one.

You will carry this with you for the rest of your days.

Somewhere along the line, dark fades to light and your mind goes blank for the first time in an eternity as you get up to follow that same routine.

Today, same as yesterday, and yesterday's yesterday, and yesterday's yesterday's yesterday, etc., etc., your partner is Ellie.

Maria seems to think the two of you are acquaintances, especially since the extroverted people around your age hadn't been able to drag much more than a few words out of you, but you don’t really talk, you stay out of each other’s ways.

You struggle to keep the smile up against the pushback of your aching cheeks when you’re talking to other people. Can never let them see.

Not even for a good reason. God, it’s just such an effort to talk about. It’s better for it to just nestle in your mind, where it’s made it’s home, where it’s comfortable.

Maybe part of why you stay out of each other’s ways is because you'd inadvertently come off as a dick during your first encounter, which would've been enough to push the already closed off Ellie to not interact with you at all. You weren't actually being rude though; she's hopefully figured that out at this point. She probably just got used to the interactions between you; silence dusted with passive aggressive remarks.

But, she doesn’t say much when you freak the fuck out if a clicker comes at you in a way that brings back memories. You’re grateful, regardless of her reason for doing so.

Perhaps it's the thought of leaving that is the spur to prick your sudden violence and, now, even you can tell you're getting worse. The feeling - it ensnares you like a bear trap when you see a clicker, so you fire frantically at its head. Blood splatters all over your front and you pull at the hem of your shirt to get a better look, mumbling, "Shit..." when you see the white fabric soaked through with the clicker's blood; cold water to the face.

Among the chaos, you must have turned on your foot weirdly, because your ankle feels like a stake has been stabbed right through it with each movement and you don’t know if you can walk.

Ellie finally manages to trace the sound of the gunshot to you after calling your name in worry for the past couple of minutes, running over to you. She pulls you around and looks over your jittery body for anything to worry about - brushes a thumb over the wet material, jerking it away before you can notice; you’re hyper aware, so you always manage to anyway - and then furrows her brows at you.

“Can you stop fucking around?”

You nod apologetically,

"Sorry. Feeling a bit out of it today..."

She sighs, still clearly angry, and turns away, "Let's go. We’re done here.”

You watch her figure retreat as you mount your horse with shaky footing. The ride back is a silent one. Once you reach the gates, you get off and pat the horse’s side. It has a name; you never cared to learn it. Maybe you knew you couldn’t stick around for long.

“Come on. Why are you just standing there?"

When your eyes meet hers, you feel utterly pathetic, but you don't have much of a choice.

“Can you… find, like, a stick? A big one...”

She stays quiet for a moment, seemingly thrown off by your question, so you're quick to add,

“I would do it but... I don't know, fuck, never mind...”

Ellie raises an eyebrow at you, her line of sight flicking down to your ankle as she takes note of your awkward stance and mutters with a sigh that makes you feel small, "Pain in the ass," before shaking her head.

"Yeah, it looks pretty bad," Ellie says after she crouches down and touches the wound, eliciting a pained wince (and a farewell to your last shred of dignity) from you.

She rises to her feet and brushes herself off as you wait for more of a response.

"Stick, right? You want a stick?"

You nod with a clenched jaw. She keeps looking down at you and the constant anticipation is starting to piss you off.

"No, you gonna ask for what you really need?" she says. "And drop the whole ‘tough guy’ act?"

You chuckle dryly, turning your eyes to the floor.

"You ever considered that maybe I actually am just a tough guy?"

“Ha ha,” she states in monotone, “Think you gave away the fact that you're not when you started crying over a twisted ankle," to which you raise an eyebrow at her.

“Uh, okay, nothing you just said was true, but, sure. Sure.”

“Yeah? Come over here and say that with some heart then, tough guy.”

You manage to take a few steps before falling.

"Yeah, that’s what I thought. Gonna need to be carried back," Ellie says.

“What about the big ass stick?”

“What is i-Fuck. Listen, even if that helps, which it won’t, you’d wreck your ankle even more and everyone’d be on my ass about it. So, quit talking and get over here," she says, reaching over to lift you off the floor.

You grimace jokingly, but Ellie doesn’t pick on the humorous nature of your words, “Oh. No piggyback?”

Ellie sighs, turning and crouching in front of you before you get on.

"I swear to god, you're infuriating," she sneers. "Now put your arms around my neck."

You’re acting slightly outside the confines of your silent, gloomy self again, and pretend to strangle her, “Since you asked so nicely.”

And you laugh at your own joke as you properly wrap your arms around her neck

"I'm glad you're having a good time; at least one of us is enjoying ourselves,” she grits out but you can hear the repressed smile in her voice.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry.”

"Good. Now shut up and enjoy the ride." Ellie says before turning her gaze back to the front.

As the two of you make your way through the fairly empty paths of Jackson, Ellie remains silent, her expression unreadable.

You keep your eyes focused on her, the small puff of air that leaves her mouth with each step, and staying quiet as your chin finds itself resting casually upon her shoulder

After a few minutes of walking in silence, Ellie finally speaks up again. Her voice is so close, the warmth of her breath and heat.

“You got them girls off your ass yet?”

“Who? The ones that are trying to... befriend me?”

“Mhm, the ones that you’re kinda friends with.”

“Yeah, they quit trying.”

"Don’t blame you… I mean, I can understand, but don’t make it too obvious.”

“I’d rather not-“

“Right, it’s just- well, if you want to be alone, fine. I… can even… make sure those assholes don’t bother you, or whatever- but, not on patrol! Don’t go wandering around on your own like that ever again. It’s dumb."

“I know, I just got caught up in the moment. Sorry.”

"Good."

A heavy silence befalls the two of you as she trudges on.

"Why are you so damn heavy?" she eventually mutters.

You lift your head off her shoulder reflexively, aware of your weight pulling her down all of a sudden,

“Sorry.”

Ellie looks over her shoulder at you, her eyebrows knitted in unexpected concern,

“Hey… I was kidding.”

“Right… I knew that…”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever," she says. "Hm, look at that, we made it," gently patting your thigh before pushing the doors open. "Time to get off."

You slowly slide off her back, making sure to land on your good leg as you watch her search the area curiously in a waiting, one-footed stance.

She returns after a second, picking you up to place you on top of one of the quaint, makeshift hospital beds before she begins rummaging through the supplies. You watch her muscles flex and then, the sight of a woman you'd seen around captures your focus.

"What happened to her?" the woman asks, causing Ellie to lift her head, looking down at you.

"Twisted my ankle."

"Well, obviously," her tone is laced with sarcasm. "My question was how you twisted your ankle."

"Turned weird."

Your response earns you a bemused raise of her blonde eyebrows, "Alright, whatever," she says, pulling up a chair and sitting before you.

After a short, boring while, she lets go of your leg and looks up at you again,

"So, you got a sprain. I'm gonna have to wrap your ankle up, alright?"

A lock of her hair continuously pesters her as she begins carefully tending to your ankle, pulling fresh bandages taut around the injury.

"It's gonna stay sensitive for a few days," the woman states, "And you shouldn't walk on it for at least a week."

She places a hand upon Ellie's shoulder, pulling her out of the deep-end of her thoughts, and turning her away from you. A muffled, but aggressive, hushed conversation ensues between them as you glance around the room restlessly, only making out the irritated tone of Ellie's responses. It ends with her pinching her nose bridge and mumbling a, "Fine," and they're facing you again.

The woman gives the two of you a nod before exiting the room,

"You two be safe out there."

“Alright. I’ll take you home. Now, get on," she turns, arms out, backpack on her front, as she waits for you to get onto her back again.

The route to your place is short and quiet as night blankets the world, or what’s left of it. Before you know it, she's pushing open the door and setting you down on yet another tattered bed - your own.

You hiss at the contact your ankle makes with the bed, but Ellie seems unfazed, patting your thigh in the same way she did before, the way that made your stomach twist,

“You gonna be okay?”

You nod, though her deadpan tone doesn’t leave much room for the honest truth.

“Alright, well… I’ll get going, then.”

There’s a stark contrast in life between her coming and going; the constant rustling of the fabric of her coat and the sound of her heavy winter boots against your creaky floorboards, the sound of her sniffles and low voice, and the flurry of gusts of nippy winds whistling - all shut out with the cold of the outside once she closes the door behind her. Well, most of it.

Now, you’re left with the bite of cold air and the deafening silence that haunts you as you sit still upon your mattress with darkness cast over the room, seeming to melt everything together.

[crusty-chronicles]

Airheaded S/O Headcannons #4 Byakuya (Bleach)

He's so confused by you

Thinks you're faking at first

You, a ryoka, on the loose in the soul society, have the unfortunate privilege of running into him first.

You'd come in with Ichigo and the others to save Rukia

And upon running into Byakuya, ask-

"Hey you! Do you have any idea where I am right now? I'm trying to get to this cell thingy and save my friend. Could you give me directions?"

Either you're incredibly stupid or incredibly brave to talk to one of the Court Guard Captains like that.

It's definitely stupidity

And you have the nerve to address him so formally.

He immediately uses the shikai of his zanpakutō

"Scatter, Senbonzakura."

And what did you you?

You swatted away the mass of blossoms like it was a bug.

"Flowers???? You tryna say I stink or something 😡😡😡"

And he's just ??????

Because nobody, not even Ichigo, was strong enough to swat away his attack.

You had to be putting on an act

There was no way you were this dumb

Not with the way your spiritual pressure had skyrocketed after learning he was the one who beat Ichigo in the world of the living.

You were trying to deceive him, he was sure if it.

At least he was until you went in for a kick and slipped, knocking the back of your skull on the roof behind you, instantly passing out.

He went over to investigate, maybe give a killing blow.

Then you shot up, nearly breaking his composure.

"Shit, I gotta help Chad!!!" Your head whipping towards him.

"I'll be back for you, flower man," And seemed to disappear in a matter of seconds.

He would've given chase

Key word: would've, if he hadn't been so confused.

The next time he saw you was after the whole Aizen reveal.

You walked up to him, despite your friends calling for you, and looked over a nasty gash on his side.

"That looks painful."

He gave a small glare towards you.

"I don't need your sympathy."

You shoved him backward and put your hand on his wound.

"Yeah, yeah, shove that attitude up your ass and let me help."

And he's ????????

Because no one had dared to talk to him like that.

"Disperse and Redistribute." Energy flowed from your palm, the gash in his side sealing up, only to reappear on your body.

You jumped away, hugging your stomach.

"Ow, that does hurt like hell! How were you walking!!!"

He's astonished, to say the least.

You took his pain for your own, after he tried to kill you earlier.

You were a peculiar human

Keeps an eye on you from then on.

Finds out that yes, you are just that stupid and feels just a little softer towards you because of it

Don't get it twisted, he still thinks of you as a nuisance, but begrudgingly helps you.

You visit the Soul Society quite often because Kisuke has you drop off new inventions.

Even if most end up broken on the way there.

Personally escorts you where you need to go because "it's faster," and, "more efficient than you getting lost and arguing with Mayori"

And you go along with it but complain because "He's being a meany about it," and, "doesn't let you talk with anyone."

"You're not here to 'talk' with friends."

"But you're my friend and I always talk with you."

"We're not friends."

And the look on your face breaks his resolve immediately.

"Acquaintances, we're acquaintances."

And you're back to being all smiles with not a thought behind your eyes.

On the days he's busy either in a captain's meeting or with work, he'll send Renji to assist you.

You almost always barge into his office anyway, kicking out his door with a frazzled Renji behind you.

"You can't just kick down the door!!!!!" And you shush his lieutenant.

"Shhh shhh shhh! Ahem... HI BYAKUYA!!!! 😃" Then you just leave

And he can't even be mad

Annoyed, very

But mad? For some reason he never was.

He doesn't baby you for obvious reasons (He's got a reputation to uphold) but he does let you get away with things.

You wanna stay over another day in the Seireitei?

He can make some arrangements

You wanna heal some of his injuries from a battle before his clan medics get there?

He'll allow you to touch him so you can help.

You accidentally broke an item you were supposed to deliver?

It's fine. Kisuke was always capable of making another.

Rukia is the one who has to point out he has feelings for you.

She had watched the two of you spar

Which is already something very difficult to get her brother to agree with.

How you managed to do it she would never know.

(It's because you kept pestering him about getting strong enough to beat the Arancars and you thought Kenpachi was too scary to train with)

The two of you fought for most of the day, not holding back whatsoever.

The spiritual pressure from the both of you overwhelming to anyone that went near.

When you decided to call it a truce, you were covered with little scratches from head to toe.

Byakuya was in a similar state.

And Rukia had noticed a shift in her brother' demeanor as he placed a hand on your head.

"You're injured." But you only beamed up at his words, smile big as ever.

"You kiddin? This is nothing. And if you're gonna complain about my injuries, I get to complain about yours."

And the smallest of smiles graced his face. His eyes looking down at you softly

"Very well then. I won't bring them up again."

Rukia waited for you to leave before confronting her brother.

"You like them, don't you?"

He turned away from her, yet she caught the slight red dusting his cheeks.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Don't play dumb. I saw you just now. When's the last time you ever sparred with somebody, let alone smile like that?" She had a smug grin on her face, knowing that her words sunk in as Byakuya left in a hurry.

Did he have feelings for you?

No, he couldn't.

He already tried his luck at happiness with Hisana.

There was no way he could just forget about her and move on.

But then why did he let his guard down with you?

Why had he let your infectious grins spread to him?

Why did a small part of him look forward to your visits?

It'd take him while to figure out what he wanted.

He eventually came to the consensus that Hisana would want him to move forward and be happy. She wouldn't want him to continue grieving over something that wasn't his fault

So after a bit of deliberation, he'd begun trying to court you.

Now Byakuya is one of the few unfortunate souls that tries to court you normally.

He tries gift giving, which you appreciate but don't understand the secret undertones.

You just think he's finally accepted you as a friend 🥺.

He invites you over to his estate to walk you through the gardens.

The whole time you have no clue it's supposed to be a date.

He's exasperated because he thinks you're being oblivious on purpose as not to hurt his feelings.

Rukia reassures him that's not the case and he just has to be direct.

"They're an idiot, remember? They're not gonna understand subtlety."

So he leads you somewhere quiet, hopefully without any interruptions, and tries to confess.

He'll place a hand on your head, a gesture you seem to enjoy, and start speaking.

He's halfway through when the dots connect in your smol brain and you realize what's going on.

You pull him by his collar and kiss him before he gets a chance to finish.

And he's glad he wasn't the one making a fool of himself this time.

He won't call you anything sweet in public.

The best you'll get out of him is your name.

But in the privacy of his estate, he'll call you dearest, sweetheart, hun, and love.

Doesn't hold you back if you wanna fight.

He trusts in your ability to choose your battles.

Although, he'll interfere if he thinks the enemy is about to kill you. Scolding you right after for being careless.

You always argue with the clan elders and he's happy you don't let them push you around.

He has to get used to being forward with you. Which is a challenge for the emotionally closed off man.

But he knows it's worth it every time you give him that dopey smile.

An: Definitely the most chaotic of the bunch so far.

NEXT UP: Kakashi Hatake

MASTERLIST

[yowyowyaoi]

Sasori’s Daily Texts from the Akatsuki

From Tobi/Obito

Obviously.

You can gloat all you want but the fact of the matter is you’re wrong; NOTHING is eternal. 

But can you keep it up without chakra strings? 🤔

Asleep or awake it’s all the same thing.

Go ahead and tell them. They’ll just think you’re crazy 😜 

I’ve tried but Hidan is insufferable and the only way to truly hurt Kakuzu is in his wallet.

Ok please just look at this tooth I feel like it’s throbbing out of my head 😣

Me and you? Teaming up? What a novel idea … REJECTED.

It’s not ridiculous. When you were human did you never just eat a bag of sugar?? It’s so soothing.

He said no cats or dogs. Not a thing about birds. And besides if Itachi can have 900 crows I can have a parakeet. 😤

From Zetsu

I don’t know why YOU get to keep all the best bodies every single time 😒 Your art isn’t more important as my stomach.

I licked his arm once but my goodness he had such a bitter aftertaste.

Clay and gunpowder. Sometimes aftershave.

It wasn’t me this time. Must have been an animal. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Me either! No Bowel Movement Club 🥳

I imagine it’s only the first blow that truly hurts. After that the body goes into too much shock to register the pain. 

From Nagato

Well I figured that with your expertise in puppet chakra control, my bodies wouldn’t be that much different to you.

Redhead unity ✊🏻

Let’s be real, here; Konan is the one running this thing.

I can if it’s cut into very small pieces. And drink lots of water afterwards.

At least yours wasn’t a goddamned pervert.

Clearly I can’t stop these things. All I can do is strongly advise you three use protection with them. Our organization is not equipped to care for babies.

I’ve never really had time to properly train it. I’ve never even heard that much about it before. Maybe Itachi will know.

Yes but I firmly believe we choose our families. And I chose this one. Even Hidan.

From Konan

No, thank you. I’ve learned to appreciate my flaws and live with them.

Okay once again, PLEASE read that book I got you on how to talk to women. For the love of God. 🤦‍♀️

Actually most of them make me sneeze; that’s why I started making paper ones lol 

Of course I can teach you. Why do you want to learn? So you can dance with a certain someone 😏

Yeah, preferably one that’ll give me a pick-up in the mornings.

If you use your chakra strings to make him trip down the stairs I will love you for forever.

I know you don’t eat but you should come for the conversations.

I know he’s been using mine the bottle was full 3 days ago and now it’s almost empty 😡

From Kisame

Itachi and I are traveling past there on our next mission. If you write down what herbs you need I’d be happy to pick them up for you on our way back.

I’m sorry; if I’d known you wanted to use the body I wouldn’t have chewed off the hands 😣

Well I suppose both have caffeine but to me, tea is more calming.

I understand but if it happens again, tell him I won’t be looking the other way. 

I don’t know. If he’s not sleepwalking he’s up for days at a time. I’m worn out trying to keep up 🫠

Please join us; Monopoly seems like it’d be your game.

I stayed until they wanted to do karaoke. Then I snuck out the back door.

That’s more Zetsu’s thing. I only do it if I’m really hungry.

Ah but, if you’re truly going to live forever, why not have some fun with life?

Yes I’ve noticed. Everyone has. But I’m fairly certain Deidara sees nobody but YOU in that way.

From Itachi

My thanks.

Not so bad today actually 

I would just say “ignore it” but he’ll probably throw a bomb into your face so 🤷🏻‍♂️

Well I was going to paint it yellow so it’d be more cheerful but Kisame thinks it would drive me crazy after a few weeks.

Watch the video I just sent and tell me that’s not Hidan 😂

Kisame said to ask you two. Tell Dei they have bakudan.

They just like to sit on top of them. I promise they aren’t pecking or causing any damage to the wood.

One of the funniest things I ever read. Laughed so hard I had to go to bed early because my head was pounding so hard after. But don’t tell Hidan, he’d kill me.

I’m not sure. But after I die you’re free to take one of my eyes and put it into your puppet to see.

From Hidan

No really DO you have one? 🤔

Wtf are you gonna do tho like won’t you catch on fire in the sun?!

He’s my best friend and I love him in a not gay way. So it IS my business asshole.

Thanks puppet dick, I’ll make Kakuzu pay you later. He prob won’t but 🤷🏼‍♂️

No fuck that, that cake was MINE they’re just being little bitches about it 

Damn could you be any gayer for him?

Wait, CAN you fly??

Stop being stingy puppet fuck just give me an arm that shoots fire it’ll be an early birthday present pleeeeease 

Idc get this thing out of my room it’s creeping me tf out 😒

From Kakuzu

I’ve tried but the only way I could see it legitimately working is if I sewed his mouth shut.

Oh of course. I’m always happy to spend an evening surrounded by culture.

That would be ideal but you know how sensitive Leader is about his appearance.

Yes but it’s the most expensive there. You’d be better off disguising yourself and getting it from your old village.

Honestly, at 91? I’m surprised it hasn’t turned to dust yet.

Perhaps Kisame would join us. Give us an evening away from the wives.

I know but what else could we do? He refuses to accept treatment. The only way we could “help” is slipping it into his tea.

Page 34. I wrote notes along the side of the diagram.

I would rip out all of my hearts before I let anyone, including you, spend money on something like that.

From Deidara

No but I’m pretty sure you enjoy making me beg.

Wasn’t me. And you can’t prove otherwise 😈

Your lack of appreciation for my art is truly the most horrible thing about you 😒

Well tough shit it’s MY turn to choose and that’s what we’re doing

Well yeah it’s awkward but I don’t want you worrying. I’m *yours*. I’ve made that clear.

Idc I’ll wear it every single day 😭

If Itachi or Kisame asks, me and Hidan were with you from 12-5 yesterday. Okay?

Keep sending pics like that and you’re gonna end me 🥵

Oh come on pleeeease? I’ll feed it and walk it and everything!

My bed or yours? 

Did you make it yourself?? Awww thank you Sasori 🥰

It’s not the only thing that’s tight ~ 😏

A real boyfriend wouldn’t question it he’d just bring a shoe and come kill it !

Hey at least I found BOTH arms this time!

Geez that sounds so boring. Can’t he send Kakuzu and Hidan instead?!

You know I hate that word … but yes, forever. And ever and ever and ever. 💛

[noyaetnox]

OCTAVINELLE HEADCANONS:

The series: DIASOMNIA / HEARTSLABYUL / OCTAVINELLE / POMEFIORE / SAVANACLAW

I refer to the trio as bubble guppies (just so you guys know)

- there's a 5050 chance he will confess his feelings. Like I strongly believe it depends on the situation and his mood, but he may just blurt out his feelings or simply not say a word. I guess you'll just have to wait and find out

- since valentine's approaching, let's talk about that 😌

-> you all spend it together no matter what, I really think he's one of those romantic people. He may not seem like it, but he's actually lovely and wants to experience proper love, which in return means a really nice valentine's 10/10

- think all your declarations of love are just a joke at first (it was the only way you could get through his thick skull 😡), untill something major happened and he realized it would've been too far for just a prank and suddenly you all are dating and lovey dovey (references to my Azul fic)

- dates with him are so fun! He brings you to all this great places and you enjoy it so much it's impossible. Most of them are near bodies of water, but not all for sure. That said, they tend to be more scenic. Like, he doesn't really like going to cinemas or places with many people, so they're usually somewhat private and most of the time it's just the two of you (can't say you hate it)

- that said, he will try to bring contracts into your relationship (it's who he is 😔), so expect to receive offers from him which are like:

1. Go on a date this Thursday, in return you will receive a kiss

2. Hold his hand outside, the two of you will have lunch together then

3. 1 kiss = 1 minute of hugging

I don't make the rules 💁 he does

- Azul has this reputation of like, an emotionless contract guy that will destroy your life but he's just so silly goofy. I strongly believe he just has like this thing where he says things in the spur of the moment and it's the funniest thing you've ever heard but nobody ever returns to that and you're just dying (he is very proud of himself, laugh more at his attempts at jokes)

- he doesn't really buy you that many gifts, but he does from time to time and it's the most Doki Doki thing. Like, if he gets you a present it's so thought over and through and you're guaranteed to love so much you want to burst (another ego boost for him)

- you in the other hand, give him stuff all the time. You had some international coins you have collected during your time back in your world, and since they're no use to you (and most of them won't buy you anything because it's like 10-20 cents), you give them to him everytime one of them pops up. His expression is priceless, it's like a child on Christmas Day (expect it's Azul and he is not a child on Christmas Day). Bring him more useless shit and he will treasure (he is secretly a hoarder)

- isn't really into PDA, mostly because it shows a weakness of his, so you just have to sneak kisses and then bolt away because he will chase you (or allow Floyd to chase you, but safely) and you're scared but he's low-key into that so-

- you two might hold hands while walking together, although his get sweaty because he's so nervous from the situation and then he's nervous because he's nervous and his hands are sweating and you won't like and think he's gross and- (let him know it's just his paranoia)

- so many words yet I've written nothing 😮‍💨

- ANYWAY! No late night cuddle sessions because bro sleeps like a log, I'm talking *snore* mimimimi 😐☝️

-> you had attempted sleepovers, but he actually sleeps so you don't do it anymore (not saying sleeping with him isn't nice but just, bro 😮‍💨. Also his sleeping clothes are also silly:

"Oh, but Noya that is inaccurate" SHUT! HE DOES AND I REFUSE TO HEAR ANYONE ELSE OUT

- you take part in his schemes 🤭 Adeuce hate that they can't even count on you because you're on Azul's side(merehehe)

- platonic: you've never felt so taken care of in your life as you do while being friends with the bubble guppies, yet here you are. They ofc you'll do the same when you're dating, but like it's not the same. Similar, but different none the less. Everyone will know you're Azul's friend and that they should keep their distance unless they want a wild Floyd on their tail ☺️

OH! I think he also may be uncomfy around blood. Trey wouldn't handle it, but I feel like Azul will just be visibly uncomfortable and disgusted. He won't pass out, tho... I think

- he's almost perfect but he likes mushrooms 😰 like genuinely is actively searching for them to eat??? Why does he do that?

- expect to suddenly have like half of your diet be mushrooms, of which only like 60% is of known origin and kind. Does he want to poison you? I guess we'll never know 😗🫶

- I have a feeling Jade wouldn't walk with you to school, idk why. It's just like, he doesn't give me the vibes, so you two are not walking to school. That's it.

- he does protect you, tho. And you really have a feeling that he doesn't, because many of the problems you run into are caused by him for his own amusement (which also includes being your knight in shining armor)

"No, the last time I had attempted to cut your finger off with craft scissors was a month ago," bro that doesn't make it better 😰 (fun fact: you probably won't be able to cut off your finger but you can easily cut skin!)

- that said, for the longest time you didn't feel like you two were in a relationship, because almost nothing changed about him. Yes, he gave you kisses and held your hand sometimes, but that was it. It took Azul to tell you that it's because he basically had a crush on you from the start and he doesn't act the way he does around you around anyone else. After that, you started noticing that Azul was telling the truth, and he does in fact act different around you than anyone else. It made you so happy that Jade noticed and he was very confused

- I believe you had to be the one to confess. But the worst part? You didn't know he liked you Bach until that confession. You might be confused if you don't think like me, but I'll try my best to explain. So. What I mean is that Jade did have a crush on you, but he hid it very well (from you at least, since Azul and Floyd noticed right away - which was just because they had known him for years). He was doing that while trying to decide whether to pursue you romantically or not, so it lasted a few weeks. Once he decided that he actually likes you fr and what's to have something special going on with you, he's decided to make a move. Now, he didn't make it obvious, no no no! He started teasing you, and flirting in a way that wasn't straight up, but made you rethink life and become frustrated because he was flirting one second and then the next he was acting like nothing happened? Yeah, no! So once it became too much for you (one day while you guys were hanging out and it happened again) you angrily yelled your confession into his face (you called him a little shit for playing with your heart, and you were so angry in the moment you didn't even care about the answer [in the moment]). He had that smug face as he told you he feels the same way and also likes you, that made you even more angry - basically your first ever kiss was a very angry one initiated by you.

- he doesn't buy you many gifts, not because he's like Azul, but he believes they should be special because if you received a gift everytime you saw each other, you would appreciate them less and less. That's why you only receive mushrooms from him (it's on you what you do with them - he told you [what will you do? Cuz I would throw them out]) regularly. He does bring flowers to dates for you, though, because he heard that it's a human custom, so he tries to appeal to you

- which brings me, the inter-relationship situation would be the best with Jade. Because he's so smart, he spent a lot of time looking into humans, and you're like a cool person so you looked into merfolk once you became friends with the bubble guppies, so it's like very balanced. You communicate well about matters, and it's just so? Nice??? There's still some misunderstandings here and there, but it's definitely very little! (And both of you sometimes forget, since you lived with only your customs for most of your lives, but since the situation is the same, there's the mutual understanding and all is well at the end of the day)

- you quickly become the couple everyone's talking about at NRC (not gonna lie, it feeds your ego as much as it does Jade's, so you two just feel powerful)

- dates with him are usually outside activities, but like calm. Walks, sightseeing (since none of you are from around the NRC location originally), HIKING, and sometimes you swim together. You enjoy them greatly, because Jade just looks so happy, and that's all you care about

- he still pulls pranks on you and treats you like a test subject. But it is slightly less than before and most of them are harmless! Which is good! You don't fear for your life as much anymore

- platonic: would be different from dating. He still would protect you, and do many of the things he does in a relationship. BUT. He will treat you like shit also. It's not the nice balance anymore, you fear for your life. Everyday is a challenge with Jade around and you sometimes question if he actually likes you. He does, since he doesn't necessarily 🙄 want you dead, okay?

- I love Floyd but I have a hard time writing for him, so I want to apologize if it isn't as great 😔

- now, it is no secret Floyd doesn't think much. Not in a "he's stupid" way, but in a "speaks whatever is on his mind" way. If he was in the Saiki K. universe, Saiki would destroy his existence.

-> this causes a lot of problems, both relationship and the normal kind

-> you kind of learn to live with it and his nature, but you're always surprised, still

- I strongly believe he also surprises himself sometimes. Like, he would say something and you would see it on his face, this like flash of surprise at what he said, but the same could be said about his actions.

- he confessed the first. He basically liked you right away, because you were squeezable, and liked the bubble guppies, which was enough for him at the beginning

-> his confession was just him one day talking to his brother, when Jade said something about them going somewhere and Floyd got upset because he didn't want to go and he said something like: "But I can't leave the shrimpy here alone, who would shower them with love?" and he would look at you and go: "I want to be your lover, shrimpy," and you can't say no, because he wasn't asking 🥲

- that is how most of your relationship is. Floyd doesn't ask, he makes orders and commands

- many people are curios about your relationship and keep asking you questions, since it baffled them. When Floyd found out that people were stopping you in his just to ask stupid question, he made it a rule to walk with you down the halls (he did do even before, but not at all times) and you were never approached again 🤌

- the relationship, though, is very fresh but you can never expect what will happen. Floyd has scary mood swings, but you both have made a set rules to follow when it happens. Like if he gets too angry and you're actually scared, you are allowed to simply leave and protect yourself (he will be angry about it in the moment but once he's feeling better he will praise you for acting as you should've have), it is stressful, but you can live with it.

- he remembers the craziest things, especially if it has something to do with you (but also other random things). Your birthday, of course, but even if you two are talking and you just mentioned the tiniest bit of like, your previous life lore EVEN if it's was a mistake because you just blurted something you remembered in the moment, he will remember. "Didn't you say you had a friend who liked this?" "Oh, weren't you 5 the last time you had this?" "Now that was the name of your first pet, this one is: ". And it's scary! How does he have such good memory? I don't know!

- he gets distracted easily, so you have to get used to it

- he does these things... Zoomies. Like dogs? You know when dogs have this burst of energy and they start running and jumping around? Yeah, Floyd does that. He just starts circling you, or runs after someone he was and wants to bully (you're just glad it isn't you, tbh)

- dates with him, though, are very lazy. He does make awesome plans, but you two meet up, he tells you he doesn't feel like it anymore and so you just end up lazing around and cuddling, then he gets angry so he talks to you about his anger, then he gets sleepy so you nap, then he gets excited so he shows you the things he has in his room or at the dorm and then he suddenly wants you to go home

- I promise he actually loves you.

- you guys say "I love you" to each other a lot. Even though some observers will say you overuse the phrase, both of you know that no matter where or how you say it, it holds the same meaning as it does during intimate and weak moments. You guys love each other, why not let the other person know?

- platonic: basically the relationship but without the kisses and "I love you"s. I believe he's a cuddler and a hand holder even without any romantic feelings.

- you two do hang out all the time, though. Like at this point you might as well be living together with how much you're seen with one another. Frequently bought together. If someone invites you somewhere, they have to specify that it's without Floyd otherwise he will show up, same vice versa

- the relationship, though, is very cute and I support it greatly 😌🙏

Not proofread because I was in a rush! I got this great idea for a Lilia fic and I have strated writing it while writing this and my creativity is just chaos right now, anyway I hope you liked it and see you in the next part - Pomefiore!

[brwnicons]

bro, i miss you so much🥹 but on your last posts, i decide to send a request and my apologise if i did the wrong way of sending request !!!11!!1! 🫶🏼

😡💔🫂📖 with Stede Bonnet !!11!! anyways have great day/night, sweetie (´ω`) you can do other request or ignore this!!

-🦈

☆ You sent it perfectly, thank you! I'm so sorry for stopping writing so suddenly. I abused too much of my hyperfocus states I grew so tired I couldn't write anything. However this time I'll be taking things easy and healthy! Btw I love sharks!! 🦈💛 ☆

😡💔🫂📖 + Stede Bonnet

1k followers event: Send me 3/4 emojis and a character and I'll try to write something <3

-> Resume: Stede and Reader have a fight and Lucius steps in to solve everything before either of you dumbasses throw yourselves off to the sea because it seems like you two can't be apart for more than 5 minutes. 1.8k words (~7 min)

-> Tags: GN!Reader, First Mate Reader, Stede Bonnet x reader, Blackbeard didn't arrive at the Revenge here, Angst?? It doesn't feel like it, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Lucius should be paid for his therapy service. Talk it through my ass, Mr Bonnet.

-> Warnings: None

Please tell me if you see any mistake!

The atmosphere is uncomfortable and the tension surrounding the galley could be cut with a knife. Nobody talked and everyone would slightly flinch at the sound of cluttering.

The fight you had previously had with captain Stede was heard in every bit of the ship and it had been so strange to see you both shouting at each other that everyone else were left petrified. And now? You were eating with the crew for the first time in months, with a frown on your face and handling the cutlery roughly, as if instead of stabbing some steak you were stabbing Stede.

Lunch went abnormally peacefully and without any argument and when everyone was finished you headed to were Roach was cleaning up the dishes and remains.

—Let me help you— You offered Roach as you took a plate and a sponge and started scrubbing. Roach only shrugged in response and stepped aside to give you more space.

As you were both working in silence, you were able to notice his ocasional side glances on your head and his sometimes hesitating breaths, as if he were deciding whether your situation actually was or was not none of his business. After a couple of minutes he sighed and decided to ask.

— Uh... you OK? That seemed like a pretty much intense argument. We expected you two to take out your swords and all.— He tried to brush it off with a bit of humor and a indifferent pitch but you caught that he wanted something. Maybe it was comforting you (something kind of odd knowing Roach's personality) or he was trying to get fuel for the crew's gossip. Your current mood didn't let you think of his intentions as friendly and so you glared at him and left the dishes in complete silence, leaving through the door right after.

What you didn't know was that a certain scribe had been intently watching the scene.

————

As the day progressed the deck's atmosphere began losing its previous tension and recovered its usually cheerfulness. You grabbed a broom and decided to busy yourself with some sweeping.

— Now, spit it. What the hell happened with you both before?—

You rose your head to meet Lucius' eyes next to you. He was sitting on the deck's stairs with his hands supporting his head.

— It's none of your business, Lucius— you turned to leave when you heard him stand up.

—None of- None of my business?! Dear, you've been nothing like yourself since that fight. You both never even fight!— he approached you and put his hands on your shoulders to make you look at him.

—Remeber when you helped me when Pete and I fought? About all the corny things you told me?— You looked down at the memory of asking Lucius to recall every time he and Pete cuddled or how happy he made him —Let me help you this time—.

You accepted your fate and sat down with him in the stairs, where you hugged him tightly.

— I was just worried about the raids... Last time he got hurt and I was so scared and— You could already feel the tears building up and you hid your face in your hands. You could feel Lucius' hand on your back, doing soothing circles —I don't want to lose him, Luce! He gets so carried away he forgets about taking care of himself!—

— And... That's why you told him you would left and resign as his First Mate if he didn't stop raiding without thinking? —

—Yeah...— You sniffed and wiped off your tears with the back of your hand when you felt a thin object being put on your knee. You accepted the handkerchief with a sad smile and wiped your eyes properly.

Seeing your current state, Lucius abruptly stood up and offered you his hand.

— I'll go talk with him — He had a stern look that said that his opinion couldn't be changed because the decision had been already made.

You sighed in defeat and, accepting his hand, you stood up and shook off your clothes.

— Alright... But don't be too harsh, please—

Lucius smiled at your words and gave you a few pats in the back

— Definetly you're not the same y/n that was trying to stab a piece of meat during lunch — You looked at him tiredly, he hadn't answer your question. — Alright, I promise. I won't be too harsh with him. —

You smiled and he gave you one final hug before walking towards the Captain's cabin.

————

Lucius didn't even bother to knock and bursted open the door to the cabin. Any pirate captain would response to that disrespectful behaviour with the amputation of a finger at least. Instead, captain Bonnet seemed so busy weeping and sobbing in his bed, in a nest made of blankets and cushions, that he didn't hear neither Lucius bursting the door open nor his next approach.

When he was right next to his captain blanket-cocoon and Stede was still unaware of his presence, he cleaned his throat to call for his attention.

— Uh... Captain? I need to talk to you —

Stede gave a visible and violent full body flinch at Lucius' words. He turned his head to the boy next to his bed and quickly tried to act as if he wasn't crying just a second ago, his face still all piffy and red.

— Good lords, Lucius, you startled me! —

He took off the blankets and stood up with a quick jump. — Well, what do you need? I hope it's important, boy! I'm quite busy at this moment —.

Lucius huffed and approached the sofa. He sat on one edge and patted the spot next to him. — I'm here to talk about your fight with your partner. Now, move your ass here because I'm going to set some things clear —. Lucius' tone didn't admit rejection and after hearing a loud gulp from Stede, he had his captain sitting next to him, fidgeting with the edges of his robe.

— What do you mean you want to talk about y/n...? Have you talked to them? — Stede was no longer able to hide his nervousness. Yeah, he had gotten angry because his dear y/n had threatened with leaving if he didn't take care. But, still, he loved them and thinking about them being sad because of the fight made his heart break. He hadn't wanted to get so angry.

— Yes, I've been talking to them — Lucius took a deep breath and interrupted his thoughts. — I can't believe it! — He pointed at his chest — You're the one that always presses the whole "talk it trough" on us but then, you transform into a sad dog after a misunderstanding with your partner! It's ridiculous! —

— Well, I'm aware that I certainly haven't behaved‐ —

— No! — Lucius grabbed one cushion that was laying around on the couch and shoved it into his captain's face — Look! I've got the cushion so it's my turn to talk. Now, listen to me. You have fought with someone who was worrying about your health and well-being, because you're the only one able to lead a raid after having been stabbed in your damn stomach! They take care of you, they worry about you and you get mad at them because of an obvious lie?! —

Stede felt silent. He knew he had made a mistake the moment he saw you running under the ship after that fight. He had felt horribly after and as the coward he was, the only thing he did was sleep. And drink. Both to forget that he hurt you.

Lucius dropped the pillow on Stede's knees and crossed his arms.

— You may speak now –.

— Lucius... — Stede hugged the pillow tightly. His glassy eyes didn't allow him to see Lucius clearly — I'm so sorry we fought- I don't want them to leave! I mean- not because of my mistakes. — Lucius gave a hum of approval as he inquired him to keep going. Stede sighed.

— I love them so much, Lucius. When the possibility of them leaving crossed my mind I got so scared I could only shout at them... I certainly wasn't acting rationally... I let myself get carried by the heat of the moment —

— Keep going — Stede sighed again and decided to maintain his eyes in a loose thread of the pillow instead of holding Lucius hard gaze.

— Neither shouldn't I have been so reckless. We don't need the raids at this moment in time and I understand y/n is as worried as my well-being as I am about theirs. I should have had their feelings into account. —

Lucius grinned in success and clapped excitedly.

— That's good! Yes, sir! Now, how do you feel —

— Miserable —.

— Well, lucky you! I'm sure a certain someone has been happy to hear all this lament of yours — Lucius gave Stede a light punch in his shoulder that Stede answered with a instant "ow". He turned towards the cabin door and waved.

— I know you're there, y/n. You can come out now! —

You peeked out from behind the door and the moment Stede saw you he stood up a headed towards you.

— Oh, dear... — He dropped the cushion at the sight of your glassy eyes, not caring if he was already crying, and took hold of both of your hands.

— I am so sorry, y/n. I mean it. I am so sorry I hurt you. Please, I can't bear being apart from you knowing it was me who hurt you. Please, forgive me. I- —. You cut his spiraling of guilt with a tight embrace.

— Of course I forgive you, you silly —. You pulled apart to take his face in your hands — I shouldn't have said that I would leave. You know I wouldn't, I love you —

— Oh, dear. I love you too —. He hugged you again and you could smell the vanilla scent of his hair.

— Well, then. I'll let you two lovebirds to it. No need to thank me I see! — You heard Lucius' fake offended tone but before either of you could thank him, he dissapeared behind the door.

— He's quite a mediator... —. You giggled at Stede's thoughtful expression and hugged him again.

————

That night you picked out the book for the night reading. You fell asleep quickly, leaned on Stede's side. A soft blanket covered you both and although tiredness didn't allow you to distinguish his words, you could feel the deep rumbling of his chest while he talked.

And next morning, you woke up next to him in the captain's cabin. He had his head on your chest and his arms encircled you. He snored softly as the golden light from the morning sun made his hair glow.

How could you leave?

[jayflrt]

this is long sorry 😅

saw you guys talking about fanservice and i have some opinions about it. for starters i do think they were told to up it since members who didn’t really used to partake in it are doing so now. why i have no idea (i actually have a theory about it being because they’re all technically legal now, however that’s another convo) but it’s definitely more than it used to be. that being said i feel like it’s a thing with enha too. they have never been the type to tell us no, unfortunately, so if they think that the y/n type fanservice is what people want then they’re gonna continue doing it. and it is what people want sadly. since their debut they’re priority has been making fans happy even if it’s not what they themselves particularly want. it’s an issue i have with them actually because they need to start saying no and setting boundaries 😭 they are kind and people use that kindness to get whatever they want.

next is that their fanservice still isn’t that bad. it’s more than it used to be most definitely, but in comparison to some other bg’s? they are still relatively tame. it’s the fanbase that makes everything so extreme. like i have absolutely no issue with fanservice, but i cannot stand the reaction to it. not only does it generally make things seem more intense than they actually are, but sometimes it makes the guys look bad? like ik that people write him this way a lot on here (lowkey have a bone to pick with some authors and how they only portray him this way as if he has no actual personality traits), but the fact that people have genuinely called heeseung a fuckboy, cheater, playboy, and toxic as if they know anything about his personal relations? the way that’s he’s discussed you would never guess that off stage he a hopeless romantic loser (affectionate) 😭. and even outside the members that people have a tendency to say whatever they want about (heejake) it’s gotten bad. hoon for example has done a little more fanservice then he used to, but that doesn’t mean logical thinking should be going out the window. we all know that weverse translations are not accurate so why were there multiple hit tweets of him allegedly saying he wants to sleep with a fan, when in reality he was talking about a damn phone lockscreen? and nobody bothered to correct themselves? 😭

i partially blame how bad things have gotten on how young a lot of the fandom is and how they don’t know how to find a balance with things. because imagine my surprise seeing people call enha the most fanservicey group they’ve ever seen lol. y’all ever heard of vixx?

you guys also mentioned send off and dear lord. i think that was the true y/n takeover of the fandom. once people realized that enha genuinely like their fans and find interest in hearing about their lives ex. them asking us to post about our days on wv, watching engene vlogs, etc. they absolutely ran with it. i have been on entwt since enha debuted and never in my years have i seen so many people obsessed with the prospect of enha perceiving them? my entire tl got taken over by people making the same repetitive jokes about the boys being cheaters and selfies. like what do you mean we have celebrated 4 birthdays with jungwon and have never had an issue with canceling the selca day until this year and it was “oh but it’d be a cute surprise!” like you know what would be even cuter? him seeing cute sweet birthday messages under his tags and not your faces 🤗

anyways my main point is that while fanservice has increased it’s not the boys’ fault that things have gone to shit lol

i have noticed that sunghoon's been doing a lot more fanservice than before !! i remember i'd always say it's such a good day to be a jayhoon stan bc they never do fanservice 😭😭 but now hoon's playing up the parasocial relationship hard 😡 i do think it's honestly just belift seeing how their fanbase is like and trying to cater towards them more. since fanservice and the y/n treatment works then that's what they're gonna keep doing to retain their growth. but yeah i totally agree that i hope they can set more boundaries :// some of the fancalls feel so uncomfortable to watch because i feel like they're being held against their will 😭

that's also true!! i think engenes have a history for exaggerating things and making things more extreme than they need to be 🤧 like that fansign where people asked them if they're okay with their gf going to the movies with other guys or texting other guys LOL they definitely knew what was up and knew we'd like to hear some jealousy so they catered to that !! omg yeah i've heard some atrocious things they've been called and it makes me feel a little uncomfortable bc if that was being said about a random stranger,, i wouldn't like that person at all!! or i'd think they had incel mentality 😭 the fact that those get pushed on enha def feels weird but in terms of fanfiction i do think people are just writing them based on a trope, so i give authors the benefit of the doubt that they don't actually think that way !! but yeah the tweets that make them out to be sleazy....... like we don't know these men at all so these are very weird assumptions to make about people

the fate tour was definitely the rise of the y/n stans 😭😭 like EVERYTHING became about interactions and everything became a selfie trend (which i don't mind as long as it's harmless but having ensd on jungwon day???) but yeah idk if people realize it but the focus is slowly shifting from stanning enha as a group for their music and artistry to stanning them because they're boyfriend material and give their fans the y/n treatment 😔

[mega-punani]

ALRIGHT IVE GOT SOME IDEAS:

Celebrity vs Hitman au:

You are a rising star who stopped producing music because of your abusive manager/spouse. You hid away until you finally felt the urge to start making music again. You boom in popularity with your comeback as a strong independent foo who don't need nobody. But uh oh, your apartment is getting bulldozed, and you gotta go NEOW.

Here comes a conveniently placed ad for a mansion with cheap ass rent. Here's the catch: roommates. You move in with a bunch of really nice skeletons! And hey! Turns out they are fans of your music (but in a cool, nice sort of way). You get along with them, not knowing that they are all very dangerous hitmen. But they won't hurt you, no worries! They're your biggest fans!

This is given me allota fluff and cute stuff.

Wild West au:

You're a no bullshit sheriff of your small hometown, and your folks have recently been getting terrorized by some masked hooligans! You've heard they were a dangerous bunch, and they've been known to stage some robberies. Now they're here to bother the old rich man on the edge of town. Of course, you lowkey don't like him cause he's sexist, but it's your job, so here you go.

Right when you get to that coot's house, they would all just scamper off like they had never been there. Tired after a long day, you hop by the bar to visit your old pal Sans, the bartender. You guys talk about everything, and he's pretty transparent about his life. What he won't tell you about is the little gang he runs. That same gang that's been harassing your little town.

This is given me Romcom, like a villain flirting with a hero type beat.

Demons au:

Why is there a glowing red pentagon in the middle of your room? AND WHY IS IT GLOWING!?

Your good friend, a pursuer of science, decided that they wanted to test if demons were real or not. In order to do that, they needed to test out an old crusty book they found in the back of an antique store. And what better place to do it than your living room floor. You, being the nice friend you are, supervised them and gave them a drop of your blood (cause your friend is anemic 😔) and BAM. Skeleton demons in your fucking house.

They are insufferable at first, but they eventually grow on you. So much so that they start getting hella clingy...

This is given me slice of life. Keep it emotional though 👍

Mafia au:

Okay, so the problem w/ this is that I have way too many ideas for this one. But let me get this clear: in all of these ideas, the skellies are mobsters.

1: Y/N is a ring fighter that used to beat the living shit out of people for rich people entertained. They used to be the skelly gang's top fighter but stopped (moral reasons, a kid, injury, family, etc) and no longer affiliates w/ the family.

Hold up! There's another fight coming up, and Sans really needs to win this one, and who else to call but you?

This one's allota hurt, misunderstanding, bad communication. Angst and sad back stories galore.

2: You save this gloopy lookin skeleton man from getting hit by a bus, AND NOW HE WANTS YOU TO INHERIT HIS CRIME ORGANIZATION!? You politely refuse (cause you have no idea how to run one of those), and so he suggests you pick one of his many sons to pick up his legacy. Now you got hot skellies flirting, threatening, and bargaining with you to choose one of them. You might just snatch that title outa spite....

Romcom again. Flirty, fun, dramatic. All the jazz.

3: Alright this one hella self indulgent.

You're the only child of a nefarious crime lord, and they appoint their best men as your body guards. They body guards being hot skeleton men. Oh hey! They also like you romantically cause, who tf wouldn't??? You're so segsy and amazing 🥰. Thas all I got though, no plot.

This one's giving me elegant romance. HELLA ELEGENT 😡. Kinda the same vibe as my hotel au.

Reincarnation au:

This one is essentially a rip off of those "villianess reincarnates in a dating sim/romance novel" mangas/manhwas.

Y/N was just a regular person who got hit by a bus and given a second chance at life. Surprise, surprise! They got reincarnated into a novel where the skellies are royality and all fight for the affections of an MC. Unfortunately, Y/N got reincarnated as a villain instead of literally anyone else. Yah know what else? The villian dies in the end! Wahoo!

In order to prevent this terrible end, you pull a few strings to make sure you're alive at the end of the day. But hazzah, the main characters are inescapable, and now their affections are geared towards you!

This one is a lot of romcom stuff.

That's all I have got so far, but yeah. Just some ideas drabbled on to one post. You might see em again soon?

[fluffypotatey]

Leverage Ep 13

SEASON 1 FINALE BABYYYYYYY no pregame thoughts!! only watch

Spoilers in the reactions (obviously):

OH MY GOD! i really thought i missed something or like an episode for a second bc of how this episode begins

jfc Leverage don’t scare me like that T^T

Jim Sterling >:((((((

THEY HAVE THE HEIST MUSIC LETS GOOOOOOOO

Parker my beloved 😍

the build up has me so exited

ELIOT MY BELOVED 😍😍

HARDINSON MY BELOVED 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

lmao Nate doing the chair turn-around cliche • love him

he sounds very drunk tho 🥺 concerned 🫠

“I got out of sales.” “Oh, so what are you in now?” “Theft.” Love you Nate <3333

Hardinson 🥰

Nate should punch this Ian Blackpoole guy, as a treat

Punch him! Punch him! Punch him!

Oh? 👀 Parker and Sophie are both surprised to find each other 👀 was this heist actually heists plural??? 👀👀👀👀

OH MY GAWD IS IT??? IS IT HEISTS PLURAL????

And they just let Nate leave??? 😂😂😂 he told y’all, to your face, that he will rob you and you let him leave????

IT’S HEISTS PLURAL!!!!

Eliot and Alec sitting in an elevator: K I S S I N G 😙😙😙😙😙

lmao did Alec buy a fucking mansion???

Noooooooo the crew is mad at each other 🥺🥺🥺🥺 stop that. it was an episode ago, sure, but still

Nate: “Why are you guys even here >:(“

Everybody: “they insulted us! and I have a reputation to uphold!”

Everybody and what they don’t say: “bc we care, okay!”

Alec wants to talk 🥺 but Parker is avoiding it (on purpose or oblivious…idk)

Nate can be so stuck up sometimes 🙄 love him tho

“You want…Eliot to…feel out my wife??” Words I didn’t think Nate would say

“Ex, Nate. Ex-wife” Sophie 😂😂😂

Sterling’s fucking reaction to the museum security 😂😂😂😄

Maggie!!!!!

NATE 😂😂😂

ELIOT 😂😂😂😂😂

THEY ARE IN THE VAN 💀💀💀

Nate getting fucking ROASTED

NOT EVEN IN BED 💀💀💀

NOT THE GIFT BUTTON CAMERA 🫢

Is he gonna tell her 👀

OHHHHH WILL HE SHARE 👀👀👀👀

OMG HE IS

OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD

HE TOLD HER

YES MAGGIE!!! TELL HIM

oh 🥺

Oh no we’re getting a flashback

ow 🤧

awwwwwww 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

AH FUCK

NOOOOOOOOOO

SHIT

THEY KNOW ABOUT MAGGIE

omg they included her in the planning

PARKER 💀💀💀 WHY

“That is confidential” girlie, these are crooks

Parker I love you 🥰

Lmaooooooo poor Nate (doesn’t feel bad for him at all)

Ah fuck they know!!! Sterling could you stop being a stalker and let the heist continue in peace >:(

Oh that poor museum guy 😅 he’s having the worst day

“Everybody knows it’s a fungus” MAGGIE I LOVE YOU

Sophie wants to reconcile with Eliot 🥺 oh wait no, everyone, she doing this with everyone

Oh she’s trying 🥺 she’s bad at it tho. very bad

Fucking spike of stress at Sterling’s appearance 😭 why can’t he just not do his job >:(((

You’re fine, Maggie. I think. I hope. I don’t know

I wanna punch Blackpoole so bad

ELIOT JUMPSCARE

I CHOKED ON MY PASTA

AND THEY DONT SEE HER

IS STERLING JUST PRETENDING TO BE BLIND (nope, he just didn’t see them, wow)

this poor museum guy 😂

we’re fine!!! we’re good!!!! (She is not fine)

YESSSSS

HEISTING IS A GOOOOOOO

WE HAVE A TIMER????

Thank you public panic

EVERYBODY HAS A STATUE

oh this is so funny

Sterling you’re behind now!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA

did they plan for lockdown? 👀 THEY DID 🔥🔥🔥

Sterling, do not threaten Maggie 😡😡😡😡

“I’m the bait” YEEEEEE

THEY STOLE THE PAINTINGS INSTEAD YES

YESSSSSSSSSSS

OH SHIT! STRESSED

GET FUCKED IAN!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

YEAH STERLING SWITCH IT UP

Nate turning the lines on Ian 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

AND HE GOT PUNCHED

FUCKING FINALLY 🥳🥳🥳

omfg, THE FUCKING CUSHIONS???

My Nate/Sophie is in conflict with Nate/Maggie

Only solution: Nate/Sophie/Maggie

They’re doing the circle thing

But it’s sad😭

Please don’t separate them!!!! NO SEPARATION

“Let’s see how hard you look” NOOOOOOO PARKER DONT SAY THAT 🥲 NO SEPARATE!!! NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO LEAVE

you know, it hurts more because Hardinson would look for her T^T he would always try and find her while Parker finds new ways to hide and blend in

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

DONT BREAK THE CIRCLE

COME BACK

BACK I SAY

Y’all listen to the tv score and turn around—

WHAT???? THATS IT????

NO!! NO IT IS NOT

THAT IS NOT THE END OF SEASON ONE WHAT THE FUCK

General thoughts:

Uh, so, what the fuck 🫠 I am so sorry to everyone who watched this show live that cliffhanger is just….so evil.

Actually so happy to see Maggie get included with the crew, and it was nice to see that things weren’t just thrown under the rug from the last episode. Like on one hand, I am sympathetic towards Sophie, but on the other, her con put the team in a lot of danger. Danger they did not agree to because their heists are never really on the safe side. So it was fun to see that “yeah, I don’t know if I can trust you like I could before.”

ESPECIALLY WITH ELIOT!!! He actually admitted that he was feeling at home with the team and getting comfortable and letting his walks down 🥺 so it makes so much sense that he’s not ready to forgive Sophie for breaking that (also, Eliot I swear, we need more episodes focused on you because WHO FUCKING ARE YOU??? Nothing is explained fully, you’re like a jack of all trades, the tank of the team, you have a very tough exterior and I just— I wanna knooooooooooow 😖)

Hardinson and Parker were so fucking cute 🥰 and I love how their relationship is building but also felt really worried because Hardinson really wants to talk to Parker about where they stand, but she’s being very avoidant about it T^T and then!!! she fucking says “Let’s see how hard you look,” WITH A FUCKING SMILE GIRLIE NO!!! DONT PLAY WITH MY HEART LIKE THAT 🫠

ough 🤧 how is this the end of the season……on to season 2 I guess

[pookiepiss69]

hi queen/king/my royalty i saw in your asks post you tagged the karate kid so i’m assuming you like it (if not just ignore this): daniel headcanons?

OH EM GEE OKAY CHAT‼️‼️

TKK

He's the type of guy to get his mum to order stuff for him and then complain bc she ordered it wrong

He's such a hater but gets SO offended when people hate back

This guy is NOT self aware, he will lit do the cringiest thing and then 2 nights later he things about it and wants to die

He HATES straight milk (trust me)

Someone asks where he's from and he's like "erm, I'm glad you asked‼️ my dads achually 🤓.." and then he'd start yapping

When he meets new people he is SO awkward he's js kinda like "oh hi I'm daniel 🧍‍♂️" and then stands behind everyone until someone talks to him

He'd be in public with someone and he sees some ugly person and he turns around to whoever he's talking to and is like "do I look like that be honest"

And then he gets offended when they say yes (they were joking)

He wants to be like those kids who can watch slashers and horror movies without being scared (unrelated but I think johnny would like horror movies) so he gets like chucky or smth and watches it and CANNOT sleep for a month

And then the cycle repeats

He would talk SO much shit and then get surprised when someone confronts him about it

Like he would talk shit to EVERYONE about johnny like even people he's friends with and then johnny gets angry at him and the entire time he's just thinking 'how did he find out 😔😔'

When it's fathers day it makes it everyone's problem that he's dad karked it

And johnny just starts yelling at him because he's annoyed about the CONSTANT yapping

"NOBODY CARES DANIEL SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE YOU END UP LIKE YOUR DAD. 🤬🤬🤬😡😡😡"

and then he goes to the bathroom and crys

CK

When he saw johnny he went home and told his kids to not peak in highschool

This guy is a HEAVY south park fan like he's been watching it since season one.

And then he finds out johnny's a family guy/american dad fan and he hates him even more

And then when they become friends they both hate on big mouth together

He once got into a argument with the principal like SCREAMING. like he was ANGRY

it was probably when Sam was in primary or smth like he got all up the principal bc they told him Sam was not napping or smth

He makes offensive ass jokes and he was selling some guy his car and he made a joke and the guy did not end up buying the car

He was not a happy bunny

He hates on Australians or smth like some specific country (not the uk because we are peak)

Sam would get in a fight with some Australian and he would be like "ofc it was an Australian 😡"

He has infact never met a Australian he js hates them

I'm sowwy australians

Whenever Amanda's mad at him he does the 'yeah I'm the WORST husband in the world/ YOU DONT LOVE ME ANYMORE ☹️☹️😭😭"

He loves johnny/j

Or does he.

Y'all lmk if I should like lawrusso or johnny hcs next

[ovaryacted]

Felt honestly. liking things as a joke is a great way to develop said kink or whatever it is, once a guy called me momma, I think, not sure if he was just joking but I was like yes please 😃 he was cool to talk to then one day I asked something random and pretty stupid, silly stupid not breaking human rights stupid, and he never answered and I was like ok got it

Dropping some Nic lore for y’all today.

I’m not even trying to be funny right now, most of my kinks all started as jokes. Like I have a few that I’ve had for as long as I started getting sexually active and others I’ve always been curious about from reading smut/fics at a young age (I know we all did it, sue me) and liked them more when I practiced them.

But I have a lot of them, especially the taboo ones, that started as jokes and I actually ended up having them. My mommy kink started out exactly like this, because I actually hate being called momma/mami in general (I think it’s corny especially coming from the wrong person). But one time, my ex called me mommy in bed by accident and it just kinda clicked for a while, but I didn’t get to explore it more cause he’s a fucking dickhead womp womp.

I actually was initially talking to a guy once who claims he was a switch and liked being called daddy, but the second I said I wanted to be called mommy suddenly it’s “no that’s weird I don’t wanna do that”. Double standards much?? Like get out of my face with that shit boy. I’d do anything to have a proper submissive man that is willing to do more than just say mommy cause I be deadass about the whole dom/sub lifestyle, but nobody wants to be as real as me. 💔

I’m sorry that man just went ghost boo, his loss cause he’ll never know the pleasure behind exploring a mommy kink fr. HES A LEWSER! 😡🍅

[magician-kitty]

Spider Gang x Male!Reader(Seperate)

Context: your ex is bothering you. Oh no…This won’t end well.

Spider Queen 🕷️👑

You were not having a good day, like at all. Your ex girlfriend, who you haven’t seen in years has crawled back into your life and somehow wants to get back together. 1st, you’d rather drink bleach than get back together with that cheating ass skank. 2nd, you’re already in a relationship with the Spider Queen.

When you first told her about you’re situation, she wasn’t thrilled as you were, in fact she’s FURIOUS. She be dammed if someone’s gonna come and snatch you from her they got another thing coming. “Tell me where that little hussy is and I’ll make sure she won’t try steal my man away” 😡

You reassured her that everything will be fine, you would handle this yourself and just talk to your ex like a reasonable adult. Seriously, what’s the worst that could happen?

You’d soon regret those words. 😫

You tried to be reasonable with your ex girlfriend, but she definitely wasn’t getting the message. "NO! I said I don't want to see you anymore, it's been one year and nothing's changed, especially you! So LEAVE ME ALONE!" You huffed as you started to walk away from her. She made a grabbed and your arm, turning you around glaring at you right in the face. “What’s the big deal!? You have a new beau don’t you? C’mon you can’t tell me you miss all this don’t you? Even my…sweet kisses~ *she started to lean in for a kiss, until a string of web fluid interrupted her.

Oh…Man…She’s in for it now. 😆 (Insert Boss Music)

Your ex was suddenly wrapped in web fluid and was dangling over your girlfriend. “So you’re the little harlot my man’s been telling me about? I’m actually glad to meet your acquaintance, ‘cause I can tell you this here: If I ever see you layin' hands on my man again, you’re the first who’s gonna be fed to my children. Understand?” 😡

She’s seemed to got the message and took of screaming.

(Sigh) “Was that really necessary, sweets?”

“You damn right it was, now bring your fine self up here and back to my lair~”

Oh man, consider yourself Lucky. As. Hell. 😳

Huntsman🕸️🕷️

This was the second time this week, your being hassled by your ex boyfriend and he just won’t leave you alone. First he shows up to your job, then he’s blowing up your phone with unknown messages (You don’t bother reading them) and Now he’s somehow stalking you, although you weren’t sure about that yet.

You didn’t want to include your spider boyfriend, Huntsman and decided to handle this yourself.

Hm, You couldn’t help feeling you forgot about something…..🤔

Uh oh…You have left your phone lying down and guess who peeked in it? 😒

All day you haven’t heard a word from your Brave Hunter and you were starting to worry; not even the others or the Queen knew where he was. You decided to check back at your place and see if he’s there.

Your phone suddenly ranged and checked your phone, it was a message from Huntsman.

“Don’t worry, you’re little “situation” is taken care of. Look up..” 😏

You had a confused look on your face before hearing a groaning sound, you looked up from a lamppost and..

There he is, your Ex hanging upside down, covering in web fluid from head to toe. With a note attached to him. “Got Wrecked”

“What the hell…” You felt two strong arms wrapped around your shoulders and immediately knew who it was.

“Surprise, I took the liberty of handing that pesky vermin for you, you’re welcome”

“You didn’t had to do that, I could have handled it myself.”

“Hm, no. Nobody, messes with my mate and leaves unscathed~”

(Sigh) What we’re you gonna do with this guy.

Syntax🕷️💾

Your on the run from the one thing you hated. What that might be you ask?

Two Words: Arranged Marriage. 😩

You were supposed to marry some (Prince/Princess) for the sake of your people, or so you thought. But in truth it’s just so your parents could gain more power that way.

Seriously? Like hell you’re going through that! You took the first chance you’d get and got the heck outta dodge.

Fast forward now you knew that it’d catch up to you again. You were summoned to your hometown because your former betrothed had somehow found you. Just your luck, you finally found a life you loved and a special someone to share it with.

Your smart genius, sweet Syntax~ 🥰😍

He was pissed the (Bleep) off when you told him about your “situation” He told you that you shouldn’t have to go through it, but you had no choice. He insisted he’d come along

“Oh, fine. I trust you my dear. But I insist I tag along as well. You might be in need of assistance”

This betrothed of yours was just like how you remembered; Beautiful on the outside, yet cold and cruel on the inside. They insist that they missed and can’t wait to marry you, as if!

“My dear, you don’t have to go through this; we can leave right now..”

(You know, I can’t really think of anything else. Sorry! Let’s say reader and Syntax handled the situation)

Goliath🏋️‍♀️🕷️

It’s been years since you ran off from your ex, your abusive ex. And you couldn’t be more glad than you did.

Because of all the hardships of the beating, the neglect, the number of scars you’ve suffered; you moved on with your life.

A new place to call home, new friends, a the love of someone better, even if he is a giant spider demon.

Despite his tough demeanor, he’s a sweetheart, not that smart; but you still like him.

Whenever you were feeling bad he’d give you gentle shoulder massages. Or even listen about your past experiences.

He’s just dying to finally meet your ex. 😡

And he may get his wish when he tells him that he’s being stalked. Blowing up your phone, unannounced gifts and crap, etc.

“Goliath, please don’t do anything rash, that last thing I want is you have blood on your hands”

“Aw relax, babe it’ll be fine. I won’t mess him up that bad. Much 😏 He chuckled darkly and went about his way.

Oh no, this won’t end well.

Later on you received a text message. You opened your phone and saw the most horrific picture you’d seen.

Your abusing ex, In the spider’s lair being fed by multiple spiders.

“He won’t be bothering you anymore, nobody will as long I’m here” ❤️ he texted to you.

Heh, wow…what a guy. You’re truly grateful to have him.

[stellariders]

I need to vent! I am so sick of people saying that they want less Stella or that this is becoming the Stella show.. First of all before Hermann became LT. We only saw LT over Truck & Squad we never saw an engine LT at 51 until that guy retired in season 7. Casey, Kelly & the other characters always had their side stories or arcs every once & a while. Once Stella became a LT. especially LT. over TRUCK 81 of course her arc would become a main one because she replaced Casey. I just find it funny how now it's a Woman in charge now all of sudden ppl have a problem with Truck 81 LT being upfront & center but when it was Casey it was all shits & giggles. I even read comments about how they wish Pelham would come back..... why? Why would they not replace the LT spot with one of 51s own. I wonder if they will keep the same energy with Mouch. Like do yall want Pelham to come back & take Engine once Hermann gets promoted or is it going to be OK for Mouch to take over even though he hasn't had the same amount of character development that Stella had into becoming LT. Sometimes i just read comments & I'm like I know for sure you are a middle age white man trolling in your mama's basement talking about you wish it go back to the good Ole days! 😡🥹 ok I'm done..for now!

people are very hypocritical when it comes to the women on this show, especially stella. they have such high standards for her and they also hate the screentime she has. but she replaced casey as lieutenant, so she gets the same screentime as he did. nobody was complaining that casey got too much screentime but now that stella has his position it’s a problem? it pissed me off but that’s just misogyny at it finest

[luvrxbunny]

🐰!! i’m here to deliver some daddy issues cringe so nobody feels silly in their own delusions 🤭 there is one gym dude where i go to - hees basically a geriatric substitution for therapy 🙃 he looks like a dupe for jason momoa - only he’s shorter, no ass, more silver hair in a manbun and a dadboad. i would say he’s in his late 40s-early 50s. nothing that worthy to look at but WHYY does he look like he would solve all my problems if only he would sit me on his lap and embrace me in a bear hug 🥲 do u see how clinically touch starved i am and what it’s doing to my sanity 🤡 pure cringinessss my friends i’m ashamed

mind you in a gym i usually wear my “i don’t want to cook anymore i want to die” shirt with a distorted Remy from Ratatouille - my clown uniform fr 😂😔 💃

ur actually so real for this lmao AND ID BE THE SAME WAY TBF

MAN BUN AND A DAD BOD???? please just call me a sweet little girl 🙇🏾‍♀️

ITLL FIX ALL MY MENTAL PROBLEMS

also he’s shorter but as long as ur bigger than me sir i’ll do anything for u.

guys i went to the mall the other day w my mom n sister but a bunch of men kept staring at me 😋 like grown men and some of them were with their gfs or wives 🤭

my mom was all like 😡 whenever she would catch them and she’d loudly be like “do you know that guy?” so that they’d feel embarrassed about staring but i LOVED IT

there was this guy that was like at least 6’1, he looked me up and down, we made eye contact and he smiled ever so slightly before looking at my boobs again and OMG yeah i loved it

ik i should probably be disturbed that older men were looking at me in that way but.. daddy issues babe 🎀

ALSO theres no such thing cringe 😇

if someone thinks that ur being cringe ur probably just not talking to the right person abt whatever ur talking abt. like… that person just doesn’t get it 🦢