#nobody is safe today

[metal-mouse]

watch me do nothing on tumblr but bombard people with boops all day today

[the-dragon-hearted]

This would kill the main act of the Odyssey, but can you imagine for a moment that Ody King of Ithica didn't have his whole: "Here's my name, address, social security number, date of birth -" moment with the Cyclops.

Can you imagine how fucking funny those prayers would've been to Poseidon?

"Dear Father I beg of you, exact my revenge on Nobody."

"Father, please hunt Nobody down for the sake of your son."

"Poseidon, Father, please make sure Nobody never makes it home."

"Dad can you go kill Nobody, please."

And Poseidon's checking his unread messages like: Whaaaat is happening???

[dilfssi]

xavi + messi x boygenius // mitski

[sulfur1c-4cid]

sometimes i like to appear in my mutuals asks and Bother them. just a little bit

[jrueships]

guess whos not going in at all this week, actually

[conkreetmonkey]

hey conky what are some controversial foods that you like

like do u fw uhhh reindeer paté or something

I'm not too controversial of a guy, to be honest. I can immediately think of a controversial food dislike, but in terms of likes? I just haven't eaten too many controversial foods. I just haven't tried too many different foods, because I live in an extremely white town with a bad economy (so most new non-chain restaurants die after 2 years absolute tops), I live with a person with deathly nut allergies, and dairy + gluten issues run in the family. I literally had Chinese takeout for the first time like two years ago. I love food and trying new things, and wish to broaden my horizons, but until circumstances change I'm a pretty burger-and-fries guy. However, off the top of my head,

I love pickles, and if I ever get the oppourtunity to eat them off the burger of somebody who doesn't like them, I would do so gladly. Not just the cucumber pickles either, I love pickled onions, pickled cauliflower, hell, I had whole pickled green beans once, and while they clearly weren't a vegetable well suited towards pickling and I'd never seek them out in a store, I found them perfectly edible. Once, we had a jumbo Costco jar of pickles, and while there were only like 2 pickles left, the jar was half full of brine, and being home alone and remembering that one 4Chan post about the guy who ate llike 12 dill pickles and experienced gastrointestinal events typically reserved for people infected with alien parasites, I decided to try to drink the whole thing. I was unable to, and then I myself had. A gut episode. The details are grisly, but let's just say that it turns out the human ass can taste certain substances.

I like my coffee black, at least that which I brew at home; I often get sugar in it when buying it from a place. In uni, there was this excellent little small-time shop near campus, and it was there that I discovered redeye coffee; regular, uncut coffee with shots of espresso added right into the cup. I took it black. The bitterness gave me strength. Not that this "strength" mattered in the end, and honestly now I feel like if I look at that too closely it'll turn out to be yet another hamfisted metaphor for my life at that point in time, but I digress. In short, I'm a black coffee drinker. I'm not obnoxious about it, and agree that it often tastes better with sugar and cream. I just can't digest cream, and try to keep a handle on my sugar intake.

I think I had pickled herring once and liked it... memories are foggy.

I'm a sardine lover. Love me some deenz. I have a mutual I know will love this, lol. My parents won't let me bring them in the house because of the smell (and honestly, I can't afford to buy my own food rn, I have $0.42 in the bank rn and my $200 "pls vote for me" provincial tax return won't deposit on my bank's mobile app for some reason (like dw I'm not DESTITUTE, I have a few hundred in cash and a few things I can sell if I ever need to, but like... I AM at the point where I can't justify buying coffee anymore. Thankfully my parents buy bulk kcups at Costco and I get to mooch off their supply lol)). Deenz 4 LYFE. I looooove seafood in general. Unfortunately, I live in a landlocked region, so access to it is scarce... I'd love to live by the sea someday, just for the cheap and easy access to fresh fish (sardines, of course, are dirt cheap compared to other types of fish, likely due in large part to their unpopularity, so they were a staple in uni).

I think I'd like reindeer paté if I ever tried it. I'd leap at the oppourtunity to try it, so long as somebody else was footing the bill or if I was super duper rich (it just SOUNDS expensive, so forgive me for assuming, lmao). I've never even tried venison in general. Every ounce of meat I've ever eaten has been farmed or fished.

In general, so long as it doesn't contain any of my main food icks (of which there are few, but they're reasonably common and I feel very strongly about them), I'd be willing to try anything at least once. I'd try a century egg. I'd try crickets. Hell, I'd try a witchetty grub if given the chance, although I wouldn't be able to promise I wouldn't make some faces while chewing that one, just because I'm not used to eating live food. I'd try earthworms, but hesitate to chew them. Really, the one thing I think I'd not want to try is any testicle-based meat, like that one kind of sushi, like I'm not willing to consume any trace of animal semen, I'm sorry. In general, offer it to me and I will try it. I'm not a very picky eater, outside of my few hard no's.

...yk what, if I ever live in a bigger city, it could be a fun experiment to just have people suggest controversial foods, and for me to go out and try them. Like, I love a good challenge/dare so long as it's not the humiliating kind. Especially if somebody else was somehow paying for the food, like idc what it is, if it won't upset my stomach or make me retch I'm eating it because it's free nutrients. I ate a whole cucumber I'd accidentally frozen once, like I cannot stress my culinary "down for anything" status enough.

[aces-to-apples]

"a kiss may be grand"🔒

Written for hollyand (@hollyand-writes) for Nobody Expects the Dragon Age Smutquisition 2024 (@dasmutquisition)!

When the cat's away and whatnot.

Rating: Explicit Category: F/M Relationships: Carver Hawke/Merrill (Dragon Age) Additional Tags: Dragon Age II - Act 1, Developing Relationship, Miscommunication, Sex Pollen, Aphrodisiacs, Vaginal Sex Words: 4,078 Collections: Nobody Expects the Dragon Age Smutquisition 2024

[sourfacedlemon]

"memento (mori)" 🔒

Written for SidheLives (@sidhelives) for Nobody Expects the Dragon Age Smutquisition 2024 (@dasmutquisition)!

King Cailan has a very special request for Duncan's new warden recruit.

Rating: Explicit Category: F/M Relationships: Cailan Theirin/Female Warden, Female Surana/Cailan Theirin Additional Tags: Ostagar (Dragon Age), Fereldan Politics (Dragon Age), political maneuvering, mostly based on my sketchy knowledge of early-modern england tbh, First Kiss, Oral Sex, Vaginal Fingering, attempts at historical dress Words: 7,060 Chapters: 2/2 Collections: Nobody Expects the Dragon Age Smutquisition 2024

[falderaletcetera]

come to think of it another reason I'm biased towards nine might be because we never reach such beautiful casual queer vibes as the doctor + rose + jack situation again, at least not as far as I've watched. like I'm honestly not that much of a shipper but that kiss scene DOES things to me. and part of that is how loosely defined the relationship seems to be, at least maybe from jack's perspective. I can't rightly say it was wholly romantic in canon, but it sure was something - yes, rose flirted with jack way more than the doctor did when they first met, but the doctor even just being chill about jack kissing him feels significant - and I do love a quasi-romantic loosely-defined Something.

[dog-girl-zezora]

...

[fatelcved]

my job sure is testing me this weekend but it’s fine i’m fine

[planetarythorns]

Nobody talk to me about Rui bloomfes or cbdb alt I will scream

[arachnidiots-a]

good morning & happy thanksgiving to those that celebrate! im really thankful for all of you that i get to write with and interact with and the people i get to call my friends! everybody here knows i could go on and on with my thanks so im trying to really keep this short but i have a lot of love and thanks for each of you and it is spilling out constantly. anyways treehouse lane dinner is at 6 so be there or be square 💓🤟

[dishewashersalmon]

Welcome to my vampire posting I needddd to drink blood or I'm going to Blow Up ouh my godddd . Not even as a sex thing I don't know why I'm putting it Here I'm just hungry :(

[gabriel19900]

one word to describe the Australian GP

[gods-favorite-autistic]

Very homophobic of my period to start on the first day of pride month