#no you dont deserve better. youre not better than this.
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Dear Liam,
I first found out about 1D in late 2011 when a friend told me about 1D and wanted me to listen to the music and watch the music videos. I liked Gotta Be you the best back then and even then when I had no idea who any of you were i was drawn to your voice the most.
Then she made me watch the Up All Night DVD and what I can say: it was you from the very first minute. I cant say for sure what it was today, but I think it was your beautiful brown warm eyes and your big genuine smile that got me. And it never changed, you were my favorite from the beginning and you will always be my favorite.
I just realized in retroperspect that I was so drwan to you because i could relate to you: your perfectionism, the way you made sure everyone was fine (the fans, the band…) and also some of your mannerism. It helped me so much to see someone perceived as mature as you also show your joy and your playfulness because I did not have to be only mature – I could also be a kid at the same time. You got a lot of backlash when you slowly started to break out of the 'Daddy direction' role and it always felt unfair to me to burden you with that role. I think a lot of the last 10 years would have been different for you if that role had not fallen onto you.
I just want you to know that I appreciated you publically breaking out of the role more than you could ever known. You helped a girl that surpressed her own feelings for years to try to ease her familys burden, that tried to play grown up when she wasnt and had to deal with the consequences from all that for a long time to break out of this cycle. I dont think I would have been able to do that if not for you showing me that you dont have to play a role to ease others burden.
I still have to deal with some of the consequences of that and I dont think I will ever fully overcome it but I got a lot better and am in a mental place I never could have imagined. I will forever be sad that you did not get the help to overcome your struggles. You deserved it so much.
It makes me so angry that you never got to show us the music you were so proud of, that you never got to go on a proper tour. You were made to sing and to perform, your stage presence was one of the best I ever experienced. Your voice was so angelic, I would have listened to anything you would have sung. You helped so many people get better but never got the chance to get better yourself.
Liam, it was you from the very first time I heard a 1D song and watched any videos of you and it was you during your solo adventure till the end. It will always be you. I always rooted so hard for you and wished you everything you wanted, especially happiness. I will carry the sadness that you never got your happy end til the day I die. I am not religious but I believe in an afterlife and I am so absolutely sure that you got all the happiness and everything good you ever deserved up there. I hope you can see that despite you receiving so much hate there is also so much love for you.
At the moment the grief is too strong form me to listen to your music. But I know that once the grief is not as raw anymore I will happy bop to your voice again until I will hear it again in the afterlife.
Sleep well Liam, you deserve the peace.
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lando and max have more 1-2 finishes than max and charles and lando started being a regular on the podium 16 months i dont even know where half of this max and charles talk comes from. I find it so funny how many charles fans are angry because apparently lando doesn't deserve this car and any other driver would have won the championship or whatever as if lando in this car isnt the reason there was a "title fight" in the first place. Like its not even untrue that he bottled a lot of points but i dont feel confident saying any driver would be able to overturn a 70 points difference vs max verstappen even in a worse car?
yeah i think i agree with pretty much everything you've said. i do think that lewis hamilton or fernando alonso would have been able to win the wdc in the 2024 mclaren, but that's because they're experienced champions who know how to approach a championship fight (and they're better drivers than lando lol) both as a driver and a member of a team. lando and mclaren clearly were not prepared to fight for a championship this year and i think drivers who have been there and done that would fare better. but those are the only two on the grid i think would actually be able to do it.
lando has made a lot of mistakes this year, and they show his lack of experience fighting for wins. that will either change as he gets more experience and mclaren really dedicate themselves to winning, or it won't and he'll continue to lose championships. who knows what'll happen 🤷🏿♀️ but the argument that he doesn't deserve the car is ridiculous to me. not only do i not think anyone "deserves" anything in sport, i also think that when your man has repeatedly stated that he only wants to be with ferrari and if ferrari is a cage it's one he wants to be in you cannot be mad at other people for having a better car. be mad at ferrari for not making a better car. charles has had a top team's car for almost his entire career, he has been at ferrari for as long as lando has been in f1. the only person who has had more opportunity in their f1 career is lewis hamilton who debuted in a team capable of winning races and challenging for championships. i feel like there is a myth of charles being biblically unlucky even though he's had more opportunity and luck that most people in f1 will ever get, and has done from the beginning of his career.
i also think that some of this narrative of lando vs charles as a contender comes down to the actual vs the potential. it is unequivocal that lando loses to max in a championship battle, because we've all seen it. but he was genuinely a contender in a way that charles has never been. therefore charles still has the potential to be better than lando in a championship fight with max. he certainly wasn't this year, but his potential is still there in a way that it never will be for lando again. and i think too many people look at charles's potential as fact, when it's really not
#ngl i also think the prevalence of lestappen in this fandom has something to do with it#in f1 rpf the most compelling narrative will always involve a championship fight because that's ultimately at the heart of the sport#and so people are projecting the championship fight onto their projections of lestappen and coming up with this#it's like shadow puppet theatre inception#delta help desk
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This is exactly why I called it “breaking my silence.” Because no one who has a criticism about Con can ever voice it without being called a bully. Because I know for a FACT that there are people who don’t like his rendition but pretend to because they don’t want to get jumped on. Like I’m sorry that I wanted to vent. About a thing that drives me crazy. And that apparently you all took that to mean “I have the only right opinion and everyone who disagrees is stupid and wrong.” Sorry for not slapping every other sentence in my original post with “this is my OPINION btw”, because it was for venting. And idk about you, but when I vent about something, i dont exactly worry about everyone taking everything I say completely literally because it’s VENTING.
YOU even mentioned expression under "there is so much more to singing then just being able to hold a tone", this is again more a question of taste so you’re welcome to a different opinion but you have to get over the fact that TO ME and a lot of other people Cons vocal expression is great and just makes me FEEL things.
That's fine, you're allowed to have your own opinions. Music is subjective. To a point. But I can tell you that I personally was never very good at being expressive in performances, and you can bet I got notes on it. And if I had performed the way Con did, I absolutely would have gotten notes on expression, breath control, diction, pronunciation... I don't think it's too much to expect that a professional actor who is getting paid to do this to actually excel at it. Especially since it's prerecorded. And I assume they would have done multiple takes. You're allowed your opinion, and you're moved by his performance. I'm allowed my opinion, and I wasn't. And I listed the things that I would have liked to see done better (or done at all) for me to like the performance. Again, my opinion.
not even a vocal trainer?, your "source" is “I took singing lessons”? Everyone can do that, that says precisely nothing about your own qualification.
Again, this was a vent post, I wasn't really expecting anyone to interact with it, I didn't realize I need to give an outline of my education and experience. It also was a bit of a joke that apparently you missed.
Being a classically trained vocalist is miles away from “I took singing lessons.” It’s the difference between saying “I can speak on biology because I have a degree in biology” versus “I took biology classes.” It means that I’ve been trained in vocal techniques like mouth placement, tongue placement, breath support, posture, projection, vocal balance, etc etc. I’m not trying to sound superior, I’m just trying to say that I know more about this topic than the average person. Is a geologist being superior by citing their degree in order to speak on a geology-related subject?
“then don’t read it! How entitled are you to think that every fanfic author in this whole entire fandom has to agree with your taste in music? Don’t like it? Don’t fucking read it”
Yeah I generally don’t. But I can’t exactly avoid it when it’s not really something that can be tagged??? It’s something that tends to just pop up in fics??? And I wasn’t actually saying that I think everyone needs to bend to my whims or some shit. I was expressing something that annoys me. In an overly exaggerated way. Not every sentence needs to be taken literally. Like if I said “ugh I hate nuts in brownies, brownies should NEVER have nuts in them” I’m not actually saying that everyone needs to stop putting nuts in their brownies because I said so. I’m saying I don’t like nuts in brownies, this is how much I don’t like nuts in brownies.
“‘I’m not saying that Con doesn’t deserve this one’ -except you literally just DID”
I didn’t. I said that people win awards who don’t deserve it all the time. I said that to indicate that having won an award for something doesn’t necessarily give credence to an argument, in general. Not necessarily to this particular situation. I didn’t fucking say Con doesn’t deserve this award. I said maybe he did. I don’t know because I haven’t seen it, and I don’t really want to tbh, but I don’t have to see a performance from 40 years ago to critique a performance from last year. Like I said, voices change. Skill levels change. Especially if you’re not actively working on keeping them up. I don’t know what Con’s vocal practice looks like, or if he even has one anymore, but I can tell you my personal opinion on this performance, based on my own education.
It’s not hateful to vent about something that bothers me without specifically saying that this is my opinion on it, and we’re allowed to have different opinions. It’s not hateful to outline the reason something bothers me. If you interpreted my tone as being superior or aggressive or “everyone should have my opinion”, whatever that means, then fine. I don’t care. I do care about being called a bully when I was venting about something that bothers me, speaking generally into the void of the internet, having tagged it appropriately as a critical post, not expecting anyone to interact with it. That “don’t like don’t read” goes both ways. Don’t like a post, don’t interact. Just block and move on. The block is there for a reason.
Okay I’m breaking my silence. Con’s voice is not good. His rendition of La Vie en Rose is bad. And grating. And his French pronunciation sucks. Sure he can hold a tune, but there’s so much more to singing than that that he doesn’t have, or isn’t trained in. Timbre. Intonation. Expression. Resonance. Breath control. Source: I’m a classically trained vocalist.
There. I said it. If I see one more fic talking about how beautiful/gorgeous/amazing/whatever Izzy’s singing is, I’m going to throw something. Surprising is fine. Because it was surprising (and out of left field) for Izzy to sing. But beautiful, it ain’t.
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"before the match, when i saw her holding something like a queen's quest flag in the entrance and when i saw her matches after joining h.a.t.e., i thought she was half-hearted and i also had some resentment. but during those 27 minutes and 23 seconds that we fought, i felt all kinds of emotions, like "i'm pissed off" and "i want you to go back to being the old kamitani." when i saw kamitani screaming out loud from the depths of her stomach, unlike before, i thought "that's where you belong." i'm sure she has all kinds of conflicts and beliefs inside her, even if she doesn't put them into words. even if our paths are different, kamitani will always remain important to me. I want to fight her again."
--maika, quoted in tokyo sports, translated by meraWRESTLING
#stardom#stardom wrestling#saya kamitani#maika#stardomedit#wrestlingedit#joshi puroresu#5star grand prix#5star gp#5star grand prix 2024#id in alt#god the thousand yard stare in the last gif. soooo delicious#it looks like it's all dawning on her at once. like the bitterness at getting injured on the first night of the 5star last year#and the resentment at losing at utami and the humiliation of having queens quest disband during her reign#and all this bitter entitlement at her core telling her she deserves better than all of this that she IS better than all of this#all of this shit that led to her betraying maika and joining hate to give herself that leg up she feels she deserves#and it all led to this! losing in the finals and maika standing over her#finally wearing all that bitterness and entitlement that's always been there on her sleeve and getting such a resolute answer#no you dont deserve better. youre not better than this.#THATS WHERE YOU BELONG!!!!!!!!!!!#crazyyyyyy im crazy.#like all the 'i wanted to make you cry' stuff turning in on itself to make her the patheticest wettest meow meow mess crybaby at the end#DELICIOUS.#ogifs#owrestling
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I had an idea, and so I made some low effort memes. Happy Dragons Rising everybody
That is all
#EDIT: i added pixal in the lineup cause i FORGOT HER FOR SO LONG#PIXAL YOU DESERVED BETTER THAN THAT IM SORRY WELCOME IN-#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago kai#jay walker#ninjago cole#ninjago zane#ninjago nya#lloyd garmadon#ninjago wu#memes#shitpost#ninjago memes#my post#i say all of this with affection to clarify#listen 2 me if zane is/was your favorite theres a high chance you're neurodivergent now#but also it looks like zane is most peoples favorite#so if that dont say anything about this shows fandom idk what does-
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I don’t know if maybe it’s just me, but is anyone else seeing a rise of people claiming that they could do a better rewrite of Voltron and then immediately say they’d make K/L cannon or Adash/ canon?
I don’t know about anyone else but I genuinely don’t think making ships canon would make the show better.
In fact I think It’d make it worse.
And considering shiro isn’t even mentioned in these and if he is it’s just to be Keith dad…. Is telling.
#listen do what you want but I’m really tired of people genuinely thinking they can do better and then forget the main story of Voltron#I’m being so dead serious#Voltron was never supposed to be about ships or which ones would be canon#it’s about 5 teens/young adult forced into space to be the ‘hero’ against a empire that’s been around for more than their entire life times#and the fact this shit keeps populating the shiro tag is what pisses me off more#I feel like I’m the only one in this fandom that enjoys ships for what they are: FUN#I have tons of ships!!! I don’t want any of them to be cannon!!! even if I love them so much!!!! why? because ships don’t need to be canon!!#you can just simply enjoy having your headcanons and making art/writing and have it be fun!!!!#nothing has to be canon#I don’t know why especially this fandom is so obsessed with it but it’s driving me CRAZY#and what makes it worse is that every time they talk about making K/L cannon is that ‘it deserves to be’#NO IT DOESNT#IT REALLY DOESNT#VOLTRON HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ROMATIC RELATİONSHİPS#UNPOPULAR OPINION BUT IT REALLY DOESNT#you want to do a re-write do it! but dont do it just because you want to make a ship CANON#because that’s not re-writing it’s just fan fiction#you are just writing a fanfic#I want to re-write Voltron too but I actually want the show to improve and be BETTER AND LOVE ITS CHARACTERS#I WANT THEM TO BE BUIKT UO THE WAY THEY SHOUKDVE BEEN#ships don’t belong in canon#sure is it maybe nice when it happens cool but let it happen without dismissing the other characters#not because fans wanted it#also stop fucking populating the shiro tag lest I come at you with a lead pipe#Voltron#voltron legendary defender#vld
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Psst this is just some advice from someone who grew up with the Wild West version of the internet but:
Just don't engage with mean spirited asks or people.
They want attention. Don't give it to them. Delete it, block em, scroll away, take a deep breath, and move on. They want to waste your time, so waste theirs instead.
They came into your house and tried to start shit in probably the most milquetoast way possible, so just block, delete, and move on. Don't even mention that you did. It'll be a fun little thing that you know and they know but no one else knows, and that's so much more satisfying.
Nothing you can say will "win" the conflict or change their mind. Just put them in time out by deleting their ask and you'll feel much better. :)
#same goes with like any anon hate or even non anon hate!#if they're reading you in bad faith fuck em!#if they've decided that you're pissing on the poor fuck em!#like idk when we forgot what 'dont feed the trolls' meant but let em starve#hate messages get so funny when you stop taking em personally#'kys wah wah you write dark shit go die' okay honey go get a snack and lie down for your nap then try again later#like honey baby sweetiepie you are a weirdo on the internet saying mean words on tumblr dot com and that's the extent of your power#go cry about it and stop being such a bitch to strangers#also stop letting people be mean weirdos to you like just put em in the trash#you deserve better than engaging#have a little pride and respect your own time and worth#not whump but something whump people need to read tbh
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BNHA manga spoilers btw
I have smtn to say ab bkdk like ok
I don't understand how ppl can't see it but ok each person has their own views and I get it but let's be so fucking serious here.
if I was ochaco or whoever you shipped w izuku and I was dating him I'd be so fucking jealous of katsuki coz????? what the actual fuck are you talking ab???? and like the opposite too like Kiri and Kats?????? my boyfriend died for his 'best friend' twice like???????? what have you done for me?
he saved up for 8 YEARS to get a suit for izuku??? do you think that's normal behaviour????
#bnha spoilers#bnha manga spoilers#bkdk#mha bkdk#boku no hero academia#bnha#bakugou katsuki#midoriya izuku#they're so gay your honour#like the jealousy that would come from this????#your lives have revolved around each other since you were 4#idk how i could possibly insert myself in there as a partner????#and like romantic partners are supposed to be the most imp people in your lives and youre telling me im fighting w your bestie that you have#a wejrd homoerotic relationship with????? people break up w their irl partners for less than that#the whole black whip awakening???#izukus little cant breathe moment when he sees katsuki dead???#oh i can go on for dayyssss#kacchan and the others#ok i see you#i know what you are#also i think kiri deserves better coz i feel like he does a lot for kats#like a lot a lot#but its not the same in return???? idk how to say it#again i havent watched past s3 and all yhe info i have are from spoilers but???? i dont think theres a lot going on?#im not including this in the post coz i could be wrong and ill accept that
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congratulations to Mme. Pascale Leclerc, who has surely just experienced both the funniest and most unhinged weekend a mother could ever have. Dear fucking christ, I hope your middlest son brought you a bottle of champagne for yourself, ma'am.
#kazoo noises#charles leclerc#cl16#monaco gp 2024#zoomies posting#sports posting#like man. where to begin. one of your racecar children is back in town for the weekend. he has yet to have a truly good work#weekend it seems in town. now this year. we're feeling ourselves a bit. we're feeling optimistic even. and then ur son becomes talk of town#because he keeps doing fucking bits on twitter about adopting his coworker who is friends with your youngest son. this goes on long enough#for actual reporters to comment on it. no one is willing to blink first so by friday night we've yes-anded ourselves to a grandson#(congratulations mme leclerc)#things go well. and then at qualifying they go DAMN WELL#BETTER THAN EVER REALLY! but man. im superstitious. i dont trust shit until its over and the dust has cleared#(the adoption jokes have continued by the way) and MEANWHILE everyone is eyeing that starting grid. were humming. we're making vague hand#gestures when commenting. we're all thinking. Maybe? (the streets can hear u tho. keep it down)#race starts. lap one CHAOS. so many fucking crashes. i'd faint if i had a child even in karting honestly.#(every parent in this sport deserves a prescription for laudanum)#but he's not in it. hes at the front. and he. well. he just Stays There. Through It All. and the laps tick down. until the race is run. and#there he is. your middlest son. cross the line and into the books. first place. home town. what curse indeed. thats your boy!!!!!!!! THERE!#they play the radio of him winning and the audio is peaked because he screams out so loudly. you can hear the water in the laughter.#later theres gonna be videos and photos taken of him pushing his boss into the harbor and diving right in after the man. those photos are#gonna be fucking studied in photography classes one day. and STILL! everyone involved with that goofy joke about him adopting his coworker#(who. despite all the silliness of the race stayed second place and got a podium) is still carrying the bit like a baton relay. Do you have#him over for family dinner? might as well add a plate i guess! people are joking about your youngest son having two nephews? a dog born#maybe a month ago and a man born about... what twenty three years and about a month ago? fuck it! family dinner#sorry this bit got away from me but as someone who loves my homecity and my mom so much it might actually be like.#a visible growth inside my body if they do an autopsy on me at time of death or like. my love will eat me alive. sometimes the charratives#gets to me#anyway cheers mme leclerc i hope you party so fucking hard this week
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“they clearly favour sainz” my man didn’t get the seat for 2025. why would they favour him??? “so he can go and have options for other top teams” (something i read with my fucking eyes on this hellsite) i don’t know how to explain it to you that ferrari doesn’t care😭 it’s not like they owe sainz something. he was faster and he went for the gap. y’all wouldn’t have survived f1 pre 2000
#speaking as a tifosa ferrari didn’t care for 4 times wdc ferrari loverboy vettel. they won’t care about Sir lewis. they don’t fucking care#charles did an absolutely amazing race. he deserved the podium. but sainz was faster because he made the second stop#it’s not had to comprehend. they are racers they are supposed to race#ferrari let them fight just like in monza. y’all just hate that carlos came up on top#im not here to say sainz is better than leclerc. they’re very different drivers and personal opinions may differ#but today sainz was faster. sorry that happened!#god why did you give the strongest battle (read charlies stupid ass takes) to your hateful soldier (i have to try and not let them get#through me)#DONT TRY TO RESPOND WITH ANYTHING JULES ADJACENT THATS IS NOT YOUR GRIEF TO SPEAK ABOUT#f1 discourse#formula 1
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Don't fucking blame Palestinians and the people who support them for this. Don't blame people who couldn't bring themselves to vote for a genocide-loving centrist for this. Even if all of them voted for Harris it wouldn't have changed the outcome.
The blame you put on the people belongs on HARRIS for refusing to explicitly promise an end to weapons and money to Israel, and end to America's enthusiastic support of the genocide. She refused to listen to the bipartisan majority of Americans who want an end to the genocide! This is not democracy, there is no choice and the people don't have enough leverage over our president if every single election is a choice between the rapid end of the world and a slightly slower end of the world.
#election#im mad#neoliberals stop yelling at your community and start yelling at the people in charge!#blame the people who ACTUALLY have power!#i love you and i want you to see that WE ALL DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS BULLSHIT#and also! vise versa! leftists dont blame ppl who voted for harris for not pushing enough#ppl are just trying to do what we think is safest and its difficult to know what the right thing to do is in this age#personally i voted for harris even though i really didn't want to bc trump is scarier#this countrys too fucking big#no 1 person should have so much power#anyway its hard to know whats real and what's an op these days so i dont blame ppl getting scared and voting for harris
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Ahhh those costume designs are so flippin’ cool!!!
I absolutely adore Uraraka’s halo helmet, that is the cutest idea that suits her overall look so well! I love the idea of her doing some combo moves with Bakugou and he just accidentally grabs and yanks it, throwing her at the villains by her head 😂 Plus the jet pack is such a smart idea, I have no idea why it’s not canon, she would be so fast in the air! And yes to NO HEELS 👏 👏 👏 So impractical.
Bakugou’s costume is soo sick too!! I like how much you pushed his design, and the X extending looks so good!?? Like how has no one done that before!?! And the tiny gauntlets are beautiful, I love the idea of him just chucking grenades at his classmates all the time now, whether they catch it or not is up to them. And the gloves are *chefs kiss* magnificent 🤌
Thanks so much for sharing these amazing designs, you totally went all out and I appreciate it so much!!! I’m also glad you’re taking care of yourself, you absolutely deserve all the love and praise. Your art is beautiful and thoughtful and should absolutely get all the attention.
I will stick around for as long as you’ll have me and then some, even if your interests change, your art and kindness are something worth being around 💜💜💜
I thought your ideas were funny, so I doodled them out, haha.
You are the bestest anon there is~ <3 Thank you for following, and liking my blog!!
Take care of yourself~
#kacchako#bnha#mha#myart#anon ask#ask#answered#I literally got emotional reading your beautiful comments. i have no words... so instead have pictures cuz theyre worth a thousand words!#sketch#doodles#also we all know why she doesnt have a jetpack!#its cuz she'd be too powerful!!#she'd be top dog with her speed agility and quirk#ochako is such an underutilised character like she has so much more potential than what canon has given her#she deserves better#she deserves to annihilate lol#i love my gurl#oops didnt mean to ramble in the tags lol#my redesign#OH OH and also i am SO excited for you to see some upcoming comics anon#plss i wanna hear your thoughts on themm hahahaha#no pressure tho! dont feel like you have to leave mssgs!
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the last unicorn post from earlier has me thinking about the master. that yana is still in there, you know? is still someone he was, if even for a brief flash across the life of a time lord. there’s no way to unlive that life. there are ways to twist it later, sure, to make utopia into hell on earth. but the life was lived. in much the same way that the doctor can remember, can feel, the love he held onto as john smith even as that life is ripped out of his hands. the doctor choose denial and then grief and then to shutter it all away. and so john smith died, and so professor yana died, and the doctor and the master live on. the doctor has done this before, and he lives in orbit around humanity, trying to keep the best parts of them and hold them deep enough to take root (which he can pretend he gets to choose, as a time lord. as a human, it all floods in and can’t be dug back out.) but what about the master, right?
to borrow a turn of phrase: i think there are two time lords left in the universe, and they both learned how to regret.
#regret here meaning less feeling the emotion of actual regret obviously because time lords do not actually funxtion on unicorn rules. they#already get sad just fine on their own. no humanity needed for that.#but i dont know. i just dont think he brushed it off so easily. i think he did a hell of a job convincing himself he did.#and what better way then to twist his own great works and destroy the species he was working so hard to save at the end of the universe.#but what about the knowledge that he *could* be that person. that somewhere in him exists a version that wanted to save people.#a version that is painfully too much like the doctor. even. now is that part worse or better than the human part?#but if past regenerations are ghosts i think yana deserves a haunt.#anyway maybe ignore this one im rambling about nothing here#theres just. i dont know. what if you were the last of your kind and in surviving you made yourself Not Like Them in a way you’ll never#escape.#i mean doctor who is just so concerned with all these plots about hybrids and children of the tardis and clones and What Makes A Time Lord.#but they’re so obsessed with it in just. a very Lore way. is what it feels like. we get brushes of more like with jenny and how she’s#physically a time lord and the doctor denies her that inheritance. a shared suffering…#but me myself im just fascinated with the doctor and the master as the time lords who survived. but they survived Wrong#its. its. children of gallifrey that don’t belong to her anymore. you know?#i dont care if river’s got time lord dna!!! or the metacrisis is physically human!!! i dont care!!! talk to me about what it means beyond#their blood and bones!!! what’s it like to have your sense of self stripped from you like that!!!#what’s it like when so much of you is the shed skin of time lords past. but one of you was human. one of you was painfully *humiliatingly*#human!!!#enough about how much dna you need to count as a time lord. i want to know how much they can mutate until they can’t be recognized as one.#does that make sense?
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Happy birthday ritsuka uenoyama the entirety of given DOSENT DESERVE U AT ALL
#the narrative the characters the fandom and kizu should be ashamed of themselves ngl#the way you gave your VERY ALL to save mafuyu at his darkest being there at his lowest helping him to find light again#even if you think you are no better than the other even when you dont know his whole story even if you feel no better than his first#you still gave your very best for him by finishing his deceased lover's song and sang it for him#only for your character arc your development your issues insecurities and trauma to be ignored shunned and discredited#your lover was your first but you knew you weren't his first#you knew he loved someone way before you and now that he's gone your lover still clutched on to the past#but you helped him moved on from the darkness and give him the light through music#you ended up filling the void he left for your lover and everyone else only for you to become a shadow of him#the fact that you a main character is constantly set aside and had no character arc whatsoever just to make way for a deceased lover#you are often demonized and hated and told that his lover and his previous lover should've been together and he would choose him over you#and when you asked him one thing he then ignored you and you tired to reach out to him only for them to blame you as you are the problem#seeing you often makes me sad because you did SO MUCH of the story and the narrative would just trash you out#but when someone calls out that you deserved better the same people will stake them saying that you dont undertand the narrative at all#if they cant appreciate your efforts just because you are not him then i would#if you were my oc i would give u the amount of love they never gave#if you were my oc i would develop and expand your character arc so that i would know you better and your ambitions#if you were my oc i would make sure you would be as loved as everyone else#and if you were my oc i would create someone to love you understand your troubles and appreciate you efforts way more than your lover could#the fandom may love a previous lover he loved but you ritsuka uenoyama shall be mine#dont mind the corny ass tags i just feel like it lmfao#uenoyama deserves better#uenoyama ritsuka#ritsuka uenoyama#given#given manga#given anime#bl animanga
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"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"
I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming
#Kind of like some post I saw a long time ago talking about how even the meanest shittiest most difficult to get along with#elderly people or whaever still deserve to have some sort of systems in place to support them so they're not just relying on the#grace of relatives or etc. who may not be able to deal with them. Not saying that I'm like mean and cruel or anything#but the fact of the matter is in most social situations either I am compromising or the other person is. Not in like an ~`ouuu im so weirdd#nobody willever understand my quirky swagg hee heee~' way but like a.. Just factually the things that make me happy and comfortable#are often incompatible with people. The way I communicate and process things is different from the way other people do and that#is always a barrier. I cannot have ''easy''' interactions. Even with 'understanding' people there is nearly always a significant#amount of effort. You can't walk into a group of people and then be like ''okay you guys all have to wear#masks and you also cant play music too loud and also we should communicate turns of speaking very clearly so group conversations#arent too stressful. and also i need this and that and we have to do this and that and '' etc. etc. You CAN. And some people will#go along with that. but they will ALWAYS secretly resent you for it. You will be the one person they're relieved to not have to be around.#theyre glad when you dont show up since they can go back to doing things however they want and not masking and all these boring#annoying things. OR you can say none of that and just deal with the loud music and the talking and the unmasked people. but then#YOU'RE compromising. and no matter how nice they are it's exhausting to be around and youre just further alienated#while in the presence of people and uncofmrtoabel the whole time.#Which I'm not saying the only form of community is a group setting specificially but just giving that as an example lol#I just wish there were a better option than ''well learn to socialize normally or just suffer then'' . Which I know is not what people are#saying. I guess I just always feel a bit scared when 'community is the answer'. Since its not like 'oh im just socially anxious and need to#get out of my shell~!' or something thats really that remedy-able. It's like.. my mostly unchangeable physical health issues combined#with the mostly unchangable literal way that my brain processes sensory informationand other things means that interacting with#others in a normal and easy way is incredibly difficult and often exhausting especially to maintain in any longform fashion. So then#when it's like ''the answer to staying safe is to maintain longform social connections!! :3 just reach out!!'' then.. ermm... O_O#also I'm not even one of the cutesy shy emotional hermits that's nervous. I'm the Bad Stereotype emotionless robotic cold seeming#looms in the corner of the room type of thing so people have less pity on you in that way. -_- ANYWAY gghj#I need like.. a designated social representative or something.. When I did work in that bookshop forever ago they gave me a#person who basically was just with me to help communicate with others on my behalf and supervise me and stuff. I need that.. Some#more extraverted person I can latch onto and they can maintain the Social Support Network for me and I can just be their +1 to all#of the Social Things and community. I have helpful skills I can contribute to other people and stuff it's just like.. I cant socialize lol#I cook food or something for you.. then you keep me in contact with Community.. a deal. (but then what about when I'm too sick to#contribute? as is often the case. there's not much place for people like me in communities sometimes i fear.. sigh.) ***
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watching Rivals i thought this was a silly little drama about rich people in the 80s why am I sobbing
#episode 5 has broken me#lizzie brought tears to my eyes when she turned down freddie but im actually full on sobbing at daysee#she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this#'are you certain you didnt lead him on' im going to kill everyone. i dont care any more. mass homicide. i love you daysee you deserve better#the way he switched up the second she named a name. i literally despise tony fucking baddingham. more than rupert.#and thats saying something you should have seen what i was saying about him in the earlier episodes#im not ok. let the women be happy let them be happy let daysee be happy let lizzie be happy LET WOMEN WIN#genuinely had to take a break when he said that line. it fucking broke me. 'i know youre a team player' die in hole explode knives knives kn#rivals#disney rivals
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