#no related tags. i want to say this to the void
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nevermore webtoon panels are so overkill, all of them are so beautifully drawn omg
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I got a new mask. Anyone want to see it?
#if anyone fuckin cares anymore#I'm tired of this shit#I feel so fuckin alone on social media#even though I have 6.650 ‘followers’ here and BARELY get shit until one of my posts gets famous#even then I still get NO asks NO replies NO NOTHIN#follower count doesn't matter on here even though a lot of people think that#how many fuckin of you people need to follow me for my shit to be seen?#Do I need to get 10k? 20k? cause even at 6.6k I don't get fuckin shit like OTHER big Tumblr blogs#who either have the SAME follower count as I do#or even lower than what I have#and they still get shit on their posts#but I'm just here rantin nowadays to the fuckin void cause NOBODY wants to fuckin talk to me or have an actual conversation#you guys only do shit like this when I say somethin bout it or I make a suicidal post#which goes to show how fuckin fake EVERYBODY is when they say they “care for you” and will still be silent when I need help or someone#but whatever#rant in the tags#I need to shut up#shut up G#Not DC#Not DC related#personal#personal post
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I can go on that ramble about the future and housing and aromanticism though now. It’s like man, the future is already something that is so inconceivable to me. To then have the sexuality that does not allow me to slot in the cookie cutter you find a romantic partner that you end up moving in with is terrible. And like In this economy I sure can’t live alone, and I know at least when I’m sick I desperately want someone to be there. And then there’s I’m likely to move around a bunch how do you deal with that housing, other than the work having paid housing. like constantly having to find somewhere that’s looking for roommates and it isn’t terrible? And then long term, when I find a job I stay at for a while (that’s remote so I’d love to live in a remote place) is it like I find a place to stay and then I’m stuck there forever and I just have to hope that I make good friends at this new place. (Friends that don’t want to live exclusively with a romantic partner no less.) I want to live with close friends so bad and I’m not sure if that’s a feasible thing for my future. I’m a person that has so much hope so I have to assume that yes it will work out, I do believe that. But man just hearing someone mention it, sparks that hope.
#… vaguely related other way too personal ramble#I need to try so hard to keep my friends for a long time. I want it so much#but I’ve never had close friends till now and once I went to a different period in my life the friends I had were gone#and Ive made really close friends now in college and one day I was talking with one of them on a walk home and mentioned still being friend#in 5 years. and they were like that’s not happening this friendgroup isn’t sticking together that long and they were right#at least for them specifically they were the one that came back worse and it’s a big group#there are most definitely different groups inside it and that makes me worry if once I finish college I’ll still chat with them at all#and oh hey tying this into another thought I had earlier… I’m planning on studying abroad next semester (that’s the application I’m procras#inating rn lol) and I’ll be like 8 hours in the future and I guess that’ll be the ultimate test on if I can really keep friends#a trial run before I graduate#and I won’t let this thinking of the future ruin my time now I know that doesn’t help but still.#well… actually summer sorta also is a trial run. and I still talked with them just less often and in a different way… it’s gonna be okay#this is a post i made#uh I am bad at tagging if things are vent posts or not#vent#oh I completely forgot to put the online part of the tag ramble! Ive made quite a few friends online and we talk for a while and I love the#and then it’s a every once in a while going hey I still care about you but I can’t hold a conversation for the life of me#and now there’s. you know who. who I care about so much and we say things I never imagined people saying about me#and I am so scared? (… sure) that that’s gonna go the same way. and I’m not sure reassurance on any of this will really help I think it’ll#just be I will only be less scared of the future as time passes and it’s proven to be wrong#mh hit the I want to keep this all inside and not let this out to not make other people think about it thing#… okay now I need to make a joke that is so tonal whiplash cause uhhh okay siffrin#… I need to go to sleep it’s late I’m sure that’s why all these feelings are being brought up… ’I’m fine’ as great role model siffrin says#… but it doesn’t feel real that people care about me. that I do actually have an impact. that I’m actually a note in someone’s story#I know it logically everyone I’ve ever known is part of me but it’s so hard to imagine that applies to me in others#okay I’m gonna go shower and go to sleep. I wanna say ignore this post but that’s not a good idea I don’t think#though just talking into the void does help a lot. I’m great at talking myself into believing that things are a okay if I just talk about i#… this wasn’t supposed to be a vent or be so long geez
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oooh, for the blind dates i think I'd set you up with maybe ieri shoko or yuki tsukumo from jujutsu kaisen! :)
(@justice-confidant)
(source: this post by bees-self-ships)
see which fictional characters your mutuals would set you up on a blind date with <;3 - Ah, thank you for both of these suggestions!! I.. got a little bit lost on the wiki because there was A Lot Of Stuff there, but reading one of your explanation rambles after that helped me understand things a lot better, so thank you for talking about their source more! From what I read about them both.. I don't think Shoko and I would get on very well, purely because it said on the wiki that she drinks alcohol all the time and that is not something I can stand (because a) my body can't tolerate alcohol and b) I really hate the smell of it when people drink it). Yuki, on the other hand, does seem really cool!! She is very powerful and I think that is very neat and cool of her ^-^
Thank you very much for sending this my way!! It means a lot~
#a call from the void#heart of the void#out of the inbox#selfship asks#icarus tag!#it only just occurred to me that I could answer asks while waiting for stuff to redownload on my laptop#rather than just having to wait until things redownloaded#so prepare for a sparkles onslaught potentially#alcohol mention#please let me know if this should be tagged with anything#i always have to specify i *can't* have alcohol rather than just saying I *don't* or *don't want to*#(though you could argue that the fact I don't like it whatsoever does make not having it easier considering my body can't tolerate it)#but that's not related. i think she as a character is neat; i like the idea of her using her abilities to heal where most similar ones hurt#selfshipping
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#fanart#poll#i wanna draw fanart but don’t know what to draw#i want to scream into the void bit I don’t wanna at the same time so I’m just saying it in a tag in a post not related to that kinda thing
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:)
#since no one is here i can just scream into the void in my tags#im so depressed and it came out of no where like two days ago#when seasonal depression hits#its hits#i left my favorite group chat and friends because ive been feeling left out and neglected and i cant handle it so i left and everyone said#to take my time and it’s okay and i need to get out of my head but how can i do that when no one cares#no one cares when i speak no one cares when i try and relate#the only time people care is when im asking them things or talking about them#i feel so alone and all my friends only reply when they see me say something that peaks their interest which is fine i probably do it#and i probably do it too but god i never noticed it as much until now#i just miss being loved and wanted#being an adult is hard especially when everyone is busy
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Deltarune
This is Toby Fox’s website and we’re just living on it. For more than seven years, his games have cast a spell on Tumblr, stealing the hearts of fans with their winning combination of storytelling, innovative gameplay, and characters filled with heart and determination. Our first look at Toby’s world of monsters and humans came in 2015 when Undertale was released. We learned the meaning of mercy and that while talking through conflict might not be the easiest path, it’s always the right one. When the first chapter of Deltarune came out in 2018, absolute chaos ensued. We met Kris, Susie, and Ralsei and set off on a brand new adventure where you fell in love with the Undertale universe all over again.
The second chapter came as a complete surprise and was one of the best gifts Tumblr received in the past year. You immediately latched onto the continuation of some of the best lore in gaming and memed the living heck out of it. You also spammed our dashes with a tiny little man in pink and yellow sunglasses—so much so that he ended up becoming the #1 video game character on all of Tumblr this year. Spamton had a chance to become a [[big shot!]] and, boy, did he take it.
And he wasn’t the only new character Deltarune threw into the mix. As a game with a combat system based almost entirely (if you’re playing correctly) on social interactions, its characters are key. They're relatable and make you want to root for them. Even, and often especially, for the bad guys. We can almost hear you yelling, “I can fix him!” into the void, and we believe you! Remember that one time you talked about the Deltarune villain, Queen, so much you skewed the tag data for one of the biggest bands of all time and the actual Queen of England? We sure do. And when Noelle Holiday joined the party, your team was finally complete.
This year marked the first anniversary of Deltarune’s second chapter, and you celebrated with every post type Tumblr has to offer. You survived the Tumblr Sexyman poll and the Spamton Sweepstakes, and for that, you all deserve the shiniest gold ribbon.
All of this to say that Toby Fox wins Tumblr. Undertale, for Tumblr, was a total cultural reset, and its impact is still felt even seven years later. It first appeared on our weekly video games list way back on September 21, 2015, just days after the game’s release—and it has been on every single list but one since then. So we’ve always known that Deltarune would find a loving home on Tumblr, and it truly has been so loved.
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How do I stop looking at porn of a specific kink that I personally find really distasteful, but arousing at the same time? I’ll be depressed, search the tags for it because I want a dopamine fix, realize what I just did and become more depressed, internally berate myself and pile on self-hate, and the cycle continues.
I’ve blocked all the related tags and terms, as well as the blogs in those tags. It’s not working. I hate this. I want to bang my head against the wall. I feel broken by it. I don’t understand. I hate this I hate this I hate this.
Okay, so let me say this straight-up: this isn't in my wheelhouse, Anon. This is more of a thing that therapists specialize in.
But let me say, maybe starting with asking yourself why you find this specific kink [that you seem to have] so disgusting would be good. What makes this kink a negative to you?
I understand being wary of using sex/kink as a crutch for depression, that can be an issue but why is it the kink itself that bothers you when it's helpful for you?
Also, perhaps asking yourself why you don't use something else in place of this kink when you're depressed is a good start too!
You can't just say "I won't be involved in this kink that helps with my depression anymore" and then not replace it with anything: that just leaves a void, which leaves you going back to that and then feeling bad again.
I'm not saying you have to pick a different kink to mess around with when you're depressed but perhaps picking one that doesn't upset you or something else completely separate that gives you that dopamine might help!
You cannot cut yourself off from something, whether you find it distasteful or generally negative, when it's helping you, without finding a replacement first. That does so much more harm than good, Anon.
I don't know how helpful this is [as this is kinda out of my wheelhouse] but I hope it helps. Let me know, Anon, especially if you have any other questions! <3
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I manifested my dream life 🥳🎊🎉
Long post incoming ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
Hi everyone. my name is Asanatu (call me sana or asa) and I just want to share my success story. Anyways, A+p, Intention, plus the void state was the method I always resonated with with. I also joined and was apart of tumblr pretty actively during the time when these were “the methods.”
I was making so much headway! I manifested money, better looks, better grades and mental health and I even mini shifted. Things were looking bright and I knew my shitty circumstances would be a memory of the past and everything would be easier. Then the switch to states, Neville Goddard,and Edward Arts happened and I was so lost. Then creators who even used the void or a+p were suddenly bullying and attacking people
for thinking thoughts create reality instead of states. They were attacking people for using the void and putting it on the pedestal even though they used it to achieve their dream life 🤡🤡 sucess stories dropped drastically, tensions were tight, and entitlement and shoving states down our throats was happening at an all time high. Honestly I gave up with the law and shifting bc I started to believe a+p truly didn’t work bc everyone was preaching that perspective out of no where even though we all started with that and people used it !!!!! Now the same is happening to non dualism…so it will be even more over complication and entitlement for the competition to be the most all knowing and debunker of the law. It will be less success stories, more tension, and paragraphs upon paragraphs on their beliefs but no success to show for it so I am most definitely leaving tumblr and for anyone who wants recourses maybe read and stick to the og creators from December for. Few posts and then dip
Expeditiously, pleaseee !!!!!
I also need to take accountability for
Myself. I’m sending this on anon mode because I have been so rude to so many bloggers and projected my newfound doubt to random, kind, helpful bloggers and I have to apologize. Most of them won’t see this because I’m blocked, but none of you guys deserved it. I would tag them but it was most Loa creators which is so embarrassing to admit, but again I apologize.
After having some self awareness I decided to stop being a loser and take accountability for my own life. I said fuck it and went back to a+p and the void state. I just affirmed robotically and used some subliminals for the void state from popular successful void blogs. After two weeks I got into the void state and manifested my dream life. After complaining and procrastinating for 6 months. As much as tumblr is toxic and the dumb entitled energy is radiating extra bright you all have to grow up and stick to what works for you. You have free will and godly powers no matter how many big headed bloggers try to intimidate you.
A summary of my manifestations from the void are: millionaire parents, 4.3 cumulative gpa, being apart of my schools honors society, dream graduation (it was yesterday) 10/10 looks, acceptance to Harvard, dream body and natural fast metabolism, being a master shifter, list of hobbies and talents, dream personality, huge mansion, cute kind rich bf, and being a desired it girl
I want to say so much more but Moral of the story is stick to what has worked you, take accountability for your journey, and ignore what doesn’t resonate with you.
I think a lot of people will relate to this. No matter what you believe in, whether that be states, non dualism, the void, a+p,etc just persist on your faith. Congrats anon and good on you for taking accountability for your own journey. I also can only speak for myself but I forgive you :)
Edit: a+p is affirm and persist
#law of assumption#manifesation#manifesting#void state#reality shifting#law of attraction#my asks#shiftblr#self concept#void success
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My partner reality checked me 😭
this is about the hermitcraft auction lol
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Hey. I'm sure all of you have seen Red's post, which they chose to call an apology (though I beg to differ in some parts), where I was called out amongst many others. This whole situation is a mess and though there have been many posts already, I just want to add my two cents, as someone who was directly named. Apologies for how late this is compared to the rest of the situation, not trying to stir it all up again, I’ve just been busy. (Please note that everything I say here is my own take/opinions and I am not directly speaking for anyone else, any issues you have with anything said here are with me alone.)
First of all, Red promised this post would be about the Crimson situation, the long prologue with the explanations of the "cliques" is completely unrelated and just an attempt to shift blame onto other groups for the situation blowing up as it did. This is especially horrible because of the fact that many of the people named are MINORS, who Red has constantly claimed to prioritize protecting, especially in the situation with Crimson exposing minors to NSFW. I'm not going to harp too much on the Crimson situation as I wasn't involved (or capable of being involved after my ban), though everything I have seen from Red has been a shitshow of mishandling, which they addressed, and I will give them credit for admitting they fucked up with it, and am VERY glad to see them step back from moderating, as I feel they were under far too much stress by both being highly active in the server as a mod and also trying to write a good story, and hope a larger variety of mods does the server good. I was there when the server hit 1k members, and knowing that the mod team didn’t grow until now (when last I heard it was around 6k?) feels like it would have driven anyone trying to moderate it insane.
However, I am here to give my side of the story, which goes back to the drama with the confession blog "@/esoterichistoria", in which they were sent an anon ask which [paraphrased] asked why the account existed and what they got out of it, in a sense that implied they didn't believe the account should exist. This ask was not answered publicly and was screenshotted and posted in the hideout, one of the NON PATREON channels in the discord. Red then went on to reveal themselves as the person behind this anon ask which led to other people sending harassment to the account. I was firmly on the side of supporting EH, and wound up creating a post of my own calling out the hypocrisy and "word of god" reliance on lore snippets sent by Red and Flynn in the discord, which when sent in the free channels would eventually disperse into the tumblr fandom. Unless I mistakenly shared a minor fact that was patreon exclusive (which would have only been shared to me by someone who was affected asking if they were right to be concerned about it) I did not intentionally state any patreon only information in any of my comments within and under that post.
That post for me, was what happened when the straw broke the camel's back. I had seen several instances of fan to fan hostility (such as telling people off for using the tumblr "#nevermore webtoon" tag for confession blog related posts, but only for the original blog and not the second one that popped up during this drama). I was fed up with watching a fandom I truly loved fall apart, and felt that speaking up about it would be the only way to see any change within this issue. However, I will admit the post was written in a stress induced craze as I was at the end of finals and preparing to move at the same time, which definitely greatly impacted my capacity to truly think through why I should make that post in the first place, but I felt the only way to get the drama out of my head was to send it out into the void of tumblr, and then, through the next day when I had a few spare moments I responded to a few people asking clarifying questions with less than stellar tact.
It was quite shocking for me to find out, just a day or so later (forgive me I am not the greatest with dates or timelines) that the Nevermore discord was gone from my server list, which I mainly noticed because I often use the emotes from that server in casual conversations with friends, and found my favorited emotes completely lacking of them. I had no message of why I had been banned, and shrugged it off as I hadn't been active in the discord community in ages, as I was busy with other things.
A few hours later, Percy, who Red had reached out to directly (but none of the other members of our "clique" as Red puts it heard a peep) shared a truly baffling DM that consisted of refusing to explain and extrapolating reasons behind actions that did not exist to justify the ban. We laughed it off and moved on, as though we enjoyed the fandom and comic itself, losing access to the discord was no loss as of our lack of usage of it in the first place.
I was in no way Stalking, nor were any of my friends. We had been members of a fandom who loved the comic and fandom, and had come to a point where our unpopular fandom opinions led us to feel a bit on the outside of the main popular opinion, and we were also just naturally shifting to different interests.
This, alongside the fallout of having expressed opinions on Montresor and the specific ways that his relationship with Ada progressed. I DON'T see people who ship Montrada as supporting a "SA Fetish Ship", I just personally wasn't a fan of it and alongside my friends who shared the same opinion, was sick of being told that we were blatantly WRONG for having a differing opinion, and chose to distance ourselves because of the level of vitriol we had experienced, and some made a statement saying we didn't wish to associate with people who enjoyed the ship, which is a perfectly normal way to interact with fandom. There are definitely perfectly valid ways to interact with the ship, and even explore it in interesting ways, it is just ways that I personally am not interested in engaging with.
(And just to point out the elephant in the room, yes I have a fic that focuses on Montrada, both because I saw a part of my former self in Ada and someone who hurt me in Montresor, and this fic was planned out long before Montrada was hinting at becoming canon in the comic. Though this fic is written in an explicit manner, it was on a site that allows that and was tagged correctly for those who wish to avoid it.)
I know I'm trying to prove myself to people who have made up their minds on if they believe Red's statement, and I know for those who have their minds made up, nothing I can say will change that unless they are willing to, and I can't force that. I personally do not agree with many opinions Red holds, and find the act of plastering the usernames of people, including minors, that they dislike on a public tumblr post knowing they have a loyal fanbase who may choose to take it upon themselves to harass people out of a sense of vigilante justice, frankly abhorrent and irresponsible. Though I would like to believe that the Nevermore fandom is better than stooping to harassment, I know it is naive to believe in any fandom that this is the case, every fandom will have a few bad apples, even if the fandom at large is kind and passionate and supportive of fellow fans. (note: as of writing at least one person I've been in contact with have received direct harassment)
As someone who has a tendency to come across as rude and bitchy when in a passionate argument/debate with someone, especially when an emotional connection to the subject is involved on my end, I know I may have been combative to an excessive degree and given myself a bad name. For anyone who has felt hurt in an argument with me, I do apologize, as sometimes I don't know the harshness of my words. I do quite enjoy a good argument, and when things get heated I do find myself being quite harsh, something many people do, especially when they have had a history of being the only one on their side of an opinion.
Despite the drama, I do still love the comic, through a more analytical lens and with caveats of my own personal opinions perhaps, but I do truly love the characters, the world, and am curious to know what comes next in the story when it returns from hiatus. Though I don't believe I will ever have a positive view of Red interpersonally, I want them and Flynn to be able to continue the comic for as long as they feel they need to tell a complete story. I probably will continue to write fic and engage with the fandom, as in my opinion, Fandom is for the Fans, not the Creators, and I truly do love sharing my writing with the Fandom, and I have many fic ideas that I want to have a chance to bring to fruition.
For those who don't wish to dig in deep on the older drama with the Montrada situation or my general drama hot takes, you can hop off here, and even if this didn't change anything for you I appreciate you taking the chance on hearing me out, as I am quite wordy and I know this post is already rather long. However, since Red’s post brought up these issues, I feel I should at least address them.
First off, on the accusation of stalking, I do feel Red may be pointing a finger and forgetting that three point back at them, as though I do understand wanting to have a grasp on who someone is when you feel wronged by them, going out of your way to construct a narrative of who's friends with who, and what they do in their free time, alongside congregating information about them to share publicly when even in the best case of you being correct their crimes were at MOST having an insular group chat and occasionally getting in arguments about unpopular fandom opinions or standing opposite your side in drama.
By every metric, while sharing screenshots can be seen as in bad taste, doing so with a small group of friends in a private group chat is not the end of the world. The phrase "keep it in the group chat" exists for a reason, people often share with their friends things they may not say publicly, and that is perfectly okay provided it's not planning some sort of direct attack on someone. People going "ugh I don't agree with xyz and wish they'd see reason" to friends is not stalking, it's a bit of gossip between friends, and when it comes from something that began as a shared interest that brought the group together, there's no harm in it. However, congregating identifying information and sharing it publicly DOES have harm in it, because no matter how many times you tell your audience not to harass people, opening the doors for it makes it more likely to happen regardless.
Secondly, calling the post an apology was a half truth. Yes, the final paragraphs WERE an apology, but based on the situation and what was truly going on, the explanations of the Cliques was unnecessary and distracted greatly from the actual apology present. Especially as the context of “Clique 2” does NOTHING to add to the story of the situation with Crimson and why an apology is necessary. The situation was blown greatly out of proportion by adding on more context than the situation required, and is definitely the reason the controversy has grown so large. Not only was diverting to the explanations of the Cliques cluttering the otherwise potentially strong apology, it both works to paint Red as the victim to garner sympathy from loyal fans, and gives a target to go after for why the situation has grown so horrible, when a concise apology that left that all out would have cleared the air on the Crimson situation and not led to a large group of people who were unjustly called out and have their information blasted for anyone to see and opening them to excessive harassment.
Finally, Speaking to Red directly, If you'll allow me to speak at you a bit personally for a moment, the way you framed things in your post regarding "Clique 2" to me in some regards comes across as a misinterpretation of criticism of the comic and its characters as a criticism of you. As a writer I understand how your work often feels like an extension of you, and criticism often feels personal, but to take a small group of people who share a similar criticism and extrapolate it to mean they're spreading vitriol about you is a bit extreme.
(And in screenshots regarding the Prospero aromanticism issue that have been posted to tumblr, this seems to be a recurring pattern of seeing anyone who has concerns about how a certain aspect is being normalized within the fandom with encouragement from the creators, which regardless of intent comes across as endorsement, as an attack and trying to make an issue out of something that isn’t really that deep.)
Anyways, the main situation regarding the Montresor and Ada ship happened over a year ago and I have no way to access or look back on what was said having been banned from the discord, there may be discrepancies in intent and execution so take all of this with a grain of salt if you'd like, but I never meant to say that you as the author were glorifying SA by having Montresor and Ada to exist as a ship. It was a mixture frustration with how Ada's characterization (as interpreted by what existed in the comic) did a 180 and how the relationship between her and Monty was framed and the fandom's manner of acting as if saying that it personally made someone uncomfortable they were just a hater trying to stir drama. The fandom's usage of the phrase “fun toxic” and overromanticizing when Monty had been consistently characterized as misogynistic (not a bad thing) and Ada's prior characterization didn't line up with the “mutually toxic” idea that was being spread. I'd be a hypocrite if I was saying that every ship had to be morally pure, I've written some pretty morally bankrupt relationships in my own original works. I just found that the way the fandom acted around Montrada at the time was really uncomfortable to be around as an SA survivor simply because of the way people were changing their opinions of the barking scene, which to me with just the context of the scene itself was not at all something Ada did consensually (or only did under coercion) and is a form of humiliation which is sexual harassment.
It was never a moral righteousness witch hunt or anything, more just some fans pointing out how the portrayal of it could come off to people who was a survivor of someone who acted like Monty and that the energy in the fandom around it was uncomfortable and didn't actually leave room for nuance on the opinions of Montrada. I have always been a proponent of letting people ship what they want to, even if it’s personally not what I enjoy in the fandom. Perhaps the way it was portrayed on my end at the time didn’t come off the way it was intended, but there is a massive difference in my opinion between thinking anyone who enjoys a particular ship is evil and being personally uncomfortable with a ship and not wanting to engage with it within fandom, even with it being canon. And the preference for Morella and Ada was never upholding a "morally pure" ship as "better" than Montrada, it was simply preference from people who had already been shipping Morellada for a long time and didn't choose to abandon ship over Montrada becoming canon, only finding new reasons to continue holding that opinion.
All in all. I’ll miss when the good times of the fandom were around, and definitely will stick around for season 2. I wish it hadn’t all turned out this way, as I’ve made great memories and friends because of this comic and community. To anyone who still has questions or something to say to me, my ask box and dms here have always been open. And hey, if Red or Flynn have anything to say to me, feel free to reach out. I’m open to a civil conversation if that's what’s desired.
~~ Rose, of the “dark stalker Clique”
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I was reading your L*ona r- I mean, your NOT L*ona ramblings, and BFOEMLAMDLSMAN you explain everything so well... I want to make everyone see your posts istg 😭😭😭(in general but specially about him)
But I was wondering— why do you censor his name? Should I censor it if I ask you about him? (Doing it here just in case) you just seem very cool and I would hate to make u uncomfortable 🥹
Anyways, he's my fav but I totally get that love/hate reactions you have towards him, I'M THE SAME. On Twitter I always go from lovemailing him to saying "I pray for your downfall." and screaming insults into a void (so like. the same but in Spanish 😭) You're not alone I get you and my inner thoughts sound EXACTLY THE SAME 😭😭😭 (I wish I could write long analysis but anytime I try to do that with ANY fav character of mine my mind just has TOO MANY THOUGHTS and they all cancel out each other and my brain just shuts down.)
[Referencing the NOT L*ONA ROT tag, I think specifically this post!]
EW, NO 🤢 I’d rather be ill on my bedsheets than project my L*ona ramblings on a large scale and force everyone to look at it xiavszjvafqycqh,(.eRyGFDga I think I’d simply dissipate from the embarrassment OTL
I don’t censor Leona’s name because he upsets me somehow, I do it as a form of begrudging endearment. It’s similar to how I sometimes refer to Jade as “J word”! I tend to break out those terms most often when I’m (unfortunately) screaming excitedly about them, like the love-hate reactions you brought up. It’s almost like they’re forbidden words or anomalies whose names must not be spoken aloud, lest you accidentally summon them... and I think that adds to the simple charm of those monikers 🙃 So it’s completely fine if you just write characters’ names without redacting them!
Anyway, I’m happy that you were able to relate to my thoughts and experiences in some way ^^ I hope that you can continue to hang around and engage with my not-L*ona-rot~
#twisted wonderland#twst#Leona Kingscholar#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#notes from the writing raven#question#Jade Leech
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Chapter 52 Hype Posting
Hi void. I am going to vibrate out of my seat. Oh I'm going feral, absolutely feral. Another WSJ cover and lead colour page next week already! Promotion on TV during prime-time in Japan! The insanely good volume 4 PV! Hokazono-sensei judging for a manga award! Kagurabachi's getting the push to be the Next Big Thing at last- you love to see it.
Kind of.
I want Hokazono-sensei to get all the recognition he deserves, but I also don't want the fandom to explode and become yet another annoying dudebro space. The success of the series is more important though, so I'm happy to see Kagurabachi get so much support. Everyone needs to know about this manga! ANYWAY.
LOOK AT THIS TROLL.
It's Chihiro's turn to have a creepy parasocial admirer now.
Hiruhiko's not doing this just for kicks, however- he deliberately (and successfully) triggered Chihiro to orchestrate his dramatic fall. Given what happened at the end of this chapter, I would not be surprised if Chihiro's literal descent is foreshadowing a metaphorical one of some kind down the line.
And this just breaks my heart:
Triggers Chihiro's rage then fucks off only to do this? I will not be mourning Hiruhiko's death.
Chihiro's not built for being a murder bot and it pains him so much to be seen as equivalent to someone like Hiruhiko. But he was taught to see things through and uses his hatred for the Hishaku to keep going. Revenge is probably the only thing he wakes up every day for- he wasn't kidding about that "fresh hatred" line in chapter 1. And neither was Shiba when he said living like this would break him. This kid needs a hug and a safe place to cry out the pain so badly, man...
More than that, though... more than anything...
HIRUHIKO'S THE FUCKIN' ANTI-HAKURI.
"We're equals", he says. "I killed my family", he mentions. "Let's be friends," he asks as he forces his way into Chihiro's life. "I'm the only one who can understand you." The hell you aren't you rat bastard. Hakuri's the one whose soul resonates with Chihiro's. He's the one Chihiro acknowledged as an equal and a friend. BEGONE, FOUL DEMON.
God damn it. Hokazono, I love you for making my most hated villain archetype into a character I want to see more of. I've never understood why playful psychopaths are so beloved but I get it with this guy. Smooth move making him the evil version of my favourite character in all of fiction, Mr. Author. Now I need Hiruhiko and Hakuri to face off over their ideals about who Chihiro really is. It would be the perfect reprise to the Sojo arc! PLEEEEEEASE. There's so much HakuHiro potential in this setup... Hakuri being the one to pull Chihiro forward again would be amazing. But not for his own goals this time- just to help Chihiro as a true friend and partner. Not gonna get too attached to this since it's just one potential development out of many... I won't let myself... (too late).
(Psst... 昼チ or 昼チヒ will probably be the JP ship tag/name for Hiruhiko/Chihiro. Ain't no way Chihiro is the top in this pair for most Japanese fujin lol.)
The Show
The main character of the play's name is Sasuke and Hokazono-sensei is a huge Naruto fan. So much so that he's taken his own spin on Naruto and Sasuke three times now (Enten, Roku no Meiyaku, Kagurabachi). Chihiro is, in fact, his OC donut steel character inspired by the most annoying emo ninja boy ever. I see you, Hokazono-sensei.
The Battle of Soshima might be a made-up title to reference the real historical event The Battle of Tsushima, which fellow Golden Kamuy fans will recognize. At any rate, there aren't any famous Japanese stage plays with the same name, so there's no direct narrative parallels to draw insight from (sad trombone noises). Fortunately for us Hiruhiko is a yapper like I hoped and tells us the plan pretty plainly anyway:
I relate so hard right now, random audience guy.
Hiruhiko says the plan to kill Chihiro's not a bluff. But he's not acting like he's intends to make good on that statement. So that means...
Perception vs Intent
Chihiro looking his best: stressed and menacing
This is gonna be huge I think. Remember what Azami said back in the Sojo arc in ch. 9:
Azami, please come back soon. I need you carnally.
Then consider likes like this...
Local violent gang member still pretty tough after becoming human shishkebab through a moving train.
Chihiro could be set up to tarnish his father's legacy.
The public doesn't know the true strength or capabilities of the weapons that won the war- they just know that Rokuhira Kunishige made them and they were the key to winning. So Chihiro dropping in on a stage play to splatter the audience with a headless corpse's blood is not a great first impression. He looks downright villainous in this scene. Awesome, but villainous.
The Hishaku are going to metaphorically "kill" Chihiro somehow. For some reason, tormenting this poor guy is absolutely vital to John's plans... it's probably more along the lines of Chihiro being a useful pawn to move around to create conflict they can exploit, but still. They're going to try to break his spirit this arc for sure. Leave Chihiro alone! He's been through enough!
I've got a hell of a lot to say about this but I need some key details from the next few chapters before going off on lunatic tangents. Fuckin' hell though, this is great. This is exactly the type of development I was hoping we'd see after Samura's chapter. Chihiro's committed to the cause of killing the Hishaku, who so far have been wholly unsympathetic villains. But killing is a wrongful act. And this chapter sets up that Chihiro might not be the sympathetic avenging swordsman we love him as in the eyes of the public- he appears to be more of a menace like some of the members of the Kamunabi accused him of. He might be challenged on his murderous modus operandi via a Hishaku-backed smear campaign. Seriously, using Chihiro's brutality against them to ruin his father's legacy would be so evil and cruel. I love it.
We'll be able to count on Shiba and Hakuri to make sure Chihiro doesn't go off the deep end at least. I wouldn't be surprised if Hiyuki played a pivotal role in helping Chihiro out this arc too, but I don't want to commit when we've hardly seen anything of her so far (my spaghetti sovereign... please come back to the main story full-time soon).
Whether or not I'm right (I'm not, I never am), Chihiro's murder sprees fueled by Fresh Hatred are going to get looked at in a critical way. High time and I am definitely here for it. Tell me what you've got to say about violent revenge motivated by grief, Hokazono-sensei. You have more space to examine the topic now compared to Farewell! Cherry Boy.
Shorter than usual but that's not a bad thing. I can always come back and edit this (came back to do so twice now already) or make another addendum post, but...
... Just choose kindness, people. For yourself and others. See you later.
#kagurabachi#I told you I'd yap about Hakuri no matter how small his appearances are (he doesn't even have to show up)#Hiyuki also appeared this chapter yay#Chihiro looks AMAZING this chapter I can't get over it
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Some Ninja Randy related art I just wanted to post right now. But it’s not just the og, but some different versions of him that I had made long time ago and decided to try drawing again today!
Oh boy, I haven’t thought of these guys in a very long time until now. Some of you who has seen some art from both my old account and the old ones in this account may know of them (expect for Bad Ending!Randy, I never really showed him, I think). And yes, I will kinda explain each one of them since the rest of you probably don’t know about them at all so here we go.
1. Evil! Randy
an evil version of Randy, with all the chaos pearls in his disposal now that the sorcerer is fully gone. And no, not in the way like in the season 2 finale but like…well.. let’s just say, he’s still trapped.
staying in the now abandoned norrisville high school (what happen to everyone in there? No body knows), Evil! Randy is mostly alone by himself, plotting and thinking about what to do next now that everything with him has changed.
If he ever does get a visitor in the school, he seems quite calm and wise towards them, showing them around and even asking them for favours to help him a little around the place, give him company as he haven’t had some in so long…..but don’t be fooled. Remember, those green orbs corrupts whoever has them and this Randy is no different.
Howard’s and the Nomicons whereabouts in this au? currently unknown.
The only new thing about him right now are those few green glowing cracks on his suit and all, I thought those would look cool on him.
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2. Horror! Randy
Now you can easily find this guys story and first drawings of him on my account. Just click on the Rc9gn tag while staying on my account, scroll far down and you’ll find it. Easy peasy. But if you’re too lazy, I’ll give you a short(er) and quick version.
This Randy’s story takes place back in season 1, right after he just became the ninja and a few days passed. He meets some evil spirit who takes a form of a ninja and tricks him into thinking that it’s from the nomicon and that there’s people who are monsters in disguise’s that he has to ‘get rid of’. Because of this along with illusions from the spirit to make it more believable, he ends up killing lots of innocents, even Howard which he immediately feels tons of regret and guilt for.
At the end, Randy becomes a lonely mess, a lost cause, a paranoid psycho ninja who now can’t tell the difference between an actual monster and a human thanks to the manipulation of the fake ninja spirit who is now suddenly gone along with the illusions.
Basically, this is a fucked up Randy who suffers a lot and is very lonely. He does kill though.
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3. Disbelief! Randy
This Randy is kinda based on and inspired by the disbelief Papyrus Undertale Au. But instead of Papyrus with Sans jacket on, it’s the poor ninja boy with Howard’s. Most of this one is just Randy wearing the only thing he has left of his dead friend, trying to avenge him. Who or what got Howard killed? From what I remember (I never wrote any of these guys stories down) it was Mcfist and Viceroy, it was an accident with a robot of theirs. They never meant to have it kill the guy but it just…happen.
Damn, I have two au’s where Howard is dead. Good lord-
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4. Bad Ending! Randy
One I have never shown here before.
This was first a ‘what if’ thing. Like what if at the season 2 finale, in the battle between the sorcerer and Randy, it ended up terribly wrong? With Julian and Howard coming in too late, The sorcerer successfully stabs Randy deeply in the chest, making him be the one to lose and slowly die. The last things he got to see and hear at the end is a concerned Julian, a devastated crying Howard and the laughter of his enemy in the background.
After dying with one last breath, Randy ends up in a void. A blank, white, empty void with no one else but him, who is now mostly black and white, expect for the bleeding wound on his chest, a painful reminder of his defeat. Well, the nomicon is with him. However, he can’t communicate with it anymore.
Why? Because the book, that is also lost of color like the boy, seems to be corrupted. Not like evil corruption but just some kind of corruption that keeps it shut and quiet, no glowing, no beeps, nothing, having this sort of ink all over the cover that never stops dripping and keeps its pages sticky and shut tight.
Randy doesn’t understand this and the place he is stuck in but all he does know is he can’t get help anymore and he can’t even get to see what is going on in his home right now, though he assumes that it’s now slowly turning into a chaotic wasteland thanks to the sorcerer. All he can do now is cry and cry, mumbling to himself and getting mad at himself for losing so easily like that, probably even developing self hatred in the process.
There is actually some continuation i made for this with a good ending, where Randy somehow is able to fix the Nomicon, get out of the endless white void, get revived, reunite with Howard along with many others and finally defeat the sorcerer once and for all. Though that one never got finished and from what I remember, it’s not really canon and not a true ending to this au so….oops.
——————
But yeah, these are my Randy Au’s. There is kinda a few more but not really.
#rc9gn#ninja show#rc9gn randy#randy cunningham#randy cunningham 9th grade ninja#ninja#au#evil au#alternative universe#doodles#drawing#fan art#bad ending
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Wow your Orym tags really are an eye-opener. You are totally right and now I understand the bitterness about this character a little better. I've seen a lot of "...but C3 is supposed to be this and that" takes and I guess a lot of people think they are owed a certain storyline?
Yeah. People feeling as though they're owed a certain storyline is not new nor exclusive to Critical Role; it's been pretty common in fandom for years (see this excellent post that I still think about). But the particular blame being placed on Orym is a fun new twist on this theme.
I'm sure there's people who hate Orym for other reasons; shipping wank is another very common form of entitlement to a particular storyline. I must admit when it comes to Twitter I think some people just yell random lies out into the void to hear their own voice because there is no underlying logic to any of it. But I do think a large number of people who have been blaming Orym for everything for what is now the majority of the campaign are doing so because he has consistetly refused to entertain the idea that Ludinus makes any valid points from the start, and the narrative has pretty much only rewarded him for that.
A lot of people really thought that Campaign 3 "all bets are off" didn't mean like, messing with the narrative structure (they hate when that happens by the way. they acted like Downfall and the Solstice Split and the fact that this has been a very plot-driven campaign rather than one about character backstory are all fucking violations of the Geneva convention the way they carried on, and I say this as a person who can complain) but rather that Critical Role, a D&D-based fantasy, would shed those pesky two previous campaigns of canon (unless of course earlier canon helps them make a point. I truly cannot believe someone made like 5 alts and harassed me and all my mutuals for an entire evening over hypocrisy for...liking one ship more than another when these idiots exist) in order to become some kind of deeply pathetic "French Revolution Except Instead Of Kings It's Gods" historical re-enactment.
We're at the point where like, nothing has validated them and everything they've claimed the gods have done, Ludinus or the Weave Mind have done like, tenfold. As mentioned, the people who were like "oh my god STOP SAYING HUBRIS anyway obviously Bells Hells would NEVER see the gods as relatable" just watched Laudna and Imogen be like "wow, they're flawed and conflicted and a fucked up family just like us." I shit you not, I saw someone criticize FCG's relationship with the Changebringer because "he had to work for it" as if that's not like...how literally all relationships work if you're not an utter black hole of entitled self-absorption. The Kreviris Imperium wants to straight up colonize all of Exandria but they turn a blind eye. There's someone out there talking about putting Rashinna's head on a pike for being willing to endanger the poor Ruidusborn children that...Liliana (probably to some extent coerced by Ludinus to be fair) could have left alone to live out their lives on Exandria. People genuinely channel some anti-abortion "but What About The Disabled Children? Shouldn't Pregnant People Be Forced To Carry And Parent Them" style arguments at Alma's "hey, we have people delay birth for like half an hour so their children don't have The Psychic Migraine Disorder That Made Imogen Possibly Suicidal". The arguments have devolved into "well, canon isn't real" and "but the status quo" as if there aren't ALIENS FROM SPACE SPEAKING AT THE DRAGON VATICAN. How STUPID do you have to be to think that wouldn't change the entire world. Or, to get back to this ask, how desperate are you to maintain the illusion that you are going to get a wish-fulfillment campaign that never once existed? So yeah. They blame Orym because otherwise they have to blame literally the entire cast, and themselves.
#answered#Anonymous#i genuinely do try not to make assumptions about people's personal lives bc it generally hurts one's argument if you're wrong#when i talk about religious trauma projections i have the receipts on file & backed up in case someone decides to start shit#but uh. i do expect that some of these people are like 19 and stupid and will get better. but some will be hardcore conservative in 20 year#anyway. i don't know how to put this but. multiple deeply stupid people have tried it with me this week. i do not know why.#do not. i tried calling people idiots to their faces and they kept talking so it's blocking time.
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hihihi, i NEED desperately for you to understand how wild the experience of checking your phone -> seeing eeler's choice notif -> realising its a tag -> realising one of the creators POSTED YOUR ART ON THEIR FRIDGE is. at work, i might add.
im sure youve seen my tags by now (apologies, i was briefly overcome with emotion) but genuinely from the bottom of my heart, thanks for making eeler's choice. i listened to it 3 times in 4 days during commutes and it was lovely every time. the writing, worldbuilding, voice acting (not quite over ran's singing voice yet), and sound design are all great. im looking forward to season 2, and looking forward to my 4th relisten :]
Hi Cat!
I want you to know I had a similar experience scrolling tumblr on my non audio drama related blog and seeing your art cross my dash. I lost it. I've been an audio drama creator for a few years now, but this is the first show that I personally created that's had this fan response, and everytime I am grateful.
I'm gonna get sappy a moment here, if you'll let me.
I graduated from college last spring with a degree in Marine Biology. I wanted to help the ocean, make an impact on people's lives. I wanted to do something that mattered.
It's been over a year, and I still can't find a job in science. So I've turned to podcasting. I wonder a lot about what I'm doing, if it makes an impact on anyone, if it matters.
Seeing that you were so moved by something Lou and I created that you've listened THREE TIMES, that you are inspired to creation by it, and that you've listened with enough care to include the tiniest details (Ran's tattoo had me HOWLING), it wowed me.
So much of creation is howling into the void. You put it out there, and you watch the downloads, and you hope that people like what you make, that it resonates with them.
So thank you. Thank you to anyone who makes fanart, writes fanfiction, fanfiction, shitposts, analysis. I'm a full time creator now. I need to have my finger on the pulse of what my audience wants, and being able to scroll the tumblr tags for my shows and SEE it is something I can't even express the importance of.
I say this at the top of every intro read I do for Poe: Evermore, for SCP Archives, for Nightmare Soup and it's true every time. I see every review and comment you guys leave. And I'm grateful for every one.
#jesus christ i rambled way too long#thank you very much for loving the show#eelers choice#eeler's choice
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