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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 3 years ago

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idk how many people would even want to see this BUT i wanna yell about Leela and Brax so here's a list of all their scenes togethr/scenes pertainng to them that i can recall (pLEASE add on if i missed anything/ you have any additional thoughts!! i could talk about these two all day!)

right off the bat in Weapon of Choice when Leela is on the outskirts of the Citadel and Brax goes to bring her back (which is interesting in and of itself, bc usually i would imagine a chancellery guard would go do that so what made Brax decide to instead??), Leela kinda goes off at him bc she's hurting and instead of trying to actually explain what's going on Brax doesn't even try to argue he just says "we need you" which is great bc Leela has that instinctive desire to be needed and to help people and he's speaking right to that -- also as far as we know, this is Leela and Brax's first actual meeting in canon? it's implied that they know of each other, which makes sense, but it doesn't seem like they've ever directly interacted before: Brax seems almost slightly uncertain, and Leela is combative, but when he's gentle with her she's actually quite receptive

the literal next scene after that, where the OT4 is all in one room for the first time (they still kinda hate each other at this point but still !!!). Narvin explaining Gryben and being a real jerk about it and Leela (understandibly!) questions if Gryben is a prison world, and Brax (who to this point has been mostly quiet as Narvin and Romana brief Leela) jumps in to both clarify Narvin's previous xenophobic statements while also maintaining the inherent questionable/negative connotations

(btw it's actually pretty important to note that Romana self-edits herself a lot when talking to Leela, especially in the earlier seasons; you can actually hear her revising the things she says to put it in terms that she thinks Leela will better understand. and i mean she does it out of genuine consideration for her friend associate but it often comes across as varying levels of patronizing. Narvin also obviously "dumbs things down" when dealing with Leela early on, but like... Brax never does that on any level. the only difference i can tell in how he addresses Leela vs how he talks to anybody else is that he seems much more kind with her than almost anyone else???)

their conversation about the Matrix in The Inquiry: this is REALLY important (and if you've ever talked to me on ao3 i've probably gone off to you about it lol) because it's layered. they're talking about the Matrix but they're also not because in answering Leela's question Brax is making a very thinly veiled allegory (which he outright states a minute later) to Time Lord society/politicians/most importantly HIMSELF -- he's actually strangely open about his morals/beliefs in this scene and i'm living for it tbh -- and i find it very interesting that even though he does directly explain what he means ("how do you know all this?" / "because i am a politician.") he also leaves it for Leela to work out the implications. like it's a very nuanced conversation bc there's double meaning in it and most people on Gallifrey seem to think that Leela is tone-deaf and can't pick up on that stuff (even Romana sometimes oversimplifies things to her) but Brax totally just lets her take from it what she will bc he believes her intelligent enough to understand. he doesn't think her any lesser because she's human.

ALSO on a secondary note to the above: the fact that Leela has a question/needed clarification (sorry, haven't listened to this in a while i forget how it actually happened) and actively sought out Brax to talk to about it?? like she knows Romana better she could have gone to her but i feel like Leela kinda imprinted on Brax and someone she can go to for help if she needs it; maybe it's partly bc she knows he's under marginally less pressure than Romana is but also the truth of the matter is that Brax was the most genuinely helpful person to her in the previous stories and that probably means a lot to her (esp. bc he acts like the essence of everything she hates about Gallifrey but he doesn't treat her the way she would expect from that). btw this topic is gonna come up again in a hot minute

that part where Brax gives her that information that might help her re: the Andred thing, even though he really probably shouldn't have done that -- it kinda makes me think about what he must have been like with Theta tbh???

actually this is mostly my own conjecture but there's some neat stuff in Spirit bc during the *waves hand vaguely* bodyswap dream sequence thing, Romana is very "!!!! Brax can help us !!!" which is tecnically Leela brain talking, so like there's the implications of the stuff i've said above about Leela having this idea of Brax where she knows he's someone she can go to for help

can u tell i'm soft for them

Leela sounding really sad/distracted when she talks about how Brax isn't there YES i'm grasping at straws but a lot of this relationship really is conveyed through the voice acting bc of how little direct focus there is on the characters. there's actually several scenes in Mindbomb where she mentions him and she outright says that she misses him during her discussion with Matthias

that implied scene with them in Mindbomb!! i have a Lot of thoughts about that!!! it's all conjecture and fanfic fodder!!! but the reason i mention this is because it seems pretty meta that out of the whole Gally Gang, it's Leela who first sees Brax when he comes back to Gallifrey and in turn she's the first person (besides Matthias, i guess) that he sees upon his return?? idk i just feel like that's somehow a meaningful detail??? also her reaction of utter shock after spending the entire episode missing him and how worked up she is when she tries to tell Romana, like I desperately need to know what happened in this missing scene MR RICHARDS PLEASE TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED

Leela insisting on going with Brax when Pandora starts hurting him and their whole conversation there is just. so good. like they're both just so soft and then when Darkel comes in Leela instantly goes into protective mode. like they just have such an open relationship bc Brax doesn't even try to be all pretentious with her, like he doesn't even try to keep up any facades when he's with her he's just very genuine and it really says a lot about both of them -- Leela is so good at seeing people, like getting down to the core of who people are and what makes them them (which is why she's good for Romana, btw, bc Romana has a lot of identity issues) and Brax is so tangled up in who he presents himself as that he barely knows who he actually is anymore but Leela can see that and she makes it so he can truly be himself and he doesn't have to hide. also she's so gentle with him when they talk about Pandora, she's very caring and empathetic and wants to make sure he's okay and i am WEAK

it's been a hot while since i listened to Panacea but I think i remember Brax being really soft with Leela when he first brings the gang to the Axis, like just sounding really glad to see her

ok other than the fact that Brax is lowkey relatable in Reborn (daydreaming fanfic about yourself/people you know? simping for Mary Tamm Romana? yeah mood, my man) there's that scene where they're first appraoching the Citadel on the alt!Gallifrey and it seems like none of them, and Brax specifically, have seen it from the outside in a good long while bc he's very in awe and he tells Leela that he wishes she could see it and he sounds sO hEcKiNg sOFT oh my word-

and once again with Leela thinking of Brax as someone she trusts for help: in Dissassembled when everything is going to crap she straight-up says that she wants to go find Brax bc he'll know what to do/be able to help

at the beginning of Annihilation when Romana is depressed and questioning if Brax truly was her friend and Leela INSTANTLY, NO HESITATION assures her that he was; i lost where i had her exact lines written down but she actually kinda goes off to make sure Romana gets the point

literally forcing myself to talk about this bc it makes my brain stall out but like,,, the Brax Hound in Annihilation,,, Leela being like "goodbye, Braxiatel... again" she sounds so sad and like UGH i always kinda forget how sad it actually is for them to lose Brax in Dissassembled bc like, it was so sudden and they didn't get to say goodbye and Leela is always losing people and i have many many feels about this scene and how all that emotion is made very clear in how they each respond to the Hound (might make a separate post abt this later if anyone is interested ::eyes::)

Enemy Lines is utter bullcrap about these two and I will never stop being salty about how they not only sidelined the very good, very subtle friendship they had in s1-4, but they??? made Leela acutally not trust Brax??? when literally this entire time she's been the one person who probably genuinely trusts him the most?? what the heck, David

I haven't heard TW3 or 4 yet but i'm assuming there's nothing worthwhile in those with regards to this duo (correct me if i'm wrong tho lol, i would love to be mistaken in this assumption)

TL;DR Leela and Brax mututally imprinted on each other and have probably the most open and healthy relationship within the OT4 and it is an absolute CRIME that nobody besides Gary Russell and Justin Richards cared enough to actually build on it in canon

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lixiehan · 4 years ago

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stress reliever

pairing: chan x self insert (female)

description: college au! school was hard and you often find yourself taking life a little too seriously - that’s where chan comes in. after being paired up for a science project (that’s worth a lot of your grade), you become irritable and stressed. the problem being, chan doesn't like attitudes.

warnings: fluff and smut themes, lots of dirty talk, male receiving oral, dom!chan, bratty and sub!reader, degradation and public sex ig???

word count: 2.5k

requested by: @coffeechangbeanie (slightly adapted the plot - not by much) also based on this unholy gif of chan. ur welcome

“and that leaves chan and y/n” your professor said, nodding at you both. “i expect every single person to do their part in this assignment, is that clear?” he continued. the class acknowledged his wishes, despite half of them being asleep.

you looked to your side to see your project partner, chan, who coincidentally happened to be your current fuck buddy. you had absolutely no idea how this came to be. you were a quiet, quote-on-quote ‘nerd’ and most boys at your school didn’t look at you. at least, that was the case, until you caught chan’s attention. of course, you found him insanely attractive. after all, his big lips and buff body ran around in your mind most days. you mostly saw him at school, as well as the very few parties you attended. you never considered approaching him, though. he’s usually found beside dozens of girls (hotter and more popular than you), pretty much begging to ride him.

you also never considered the idea that chan, of all people, would approach you and offer you help. the very few times that boys spoke to you, it usually consisted of them for help with the work that had been set. yet, the ‘relationship’ between you two started the day he saw you staring at the paper in front of you with utter distress in your eyes.

“y/n, right?” he spoke from behind you, his hand making an appearance on the table next to you. instantly you felt a knot in your stomach as he leaned over you, “you are looking particularly stressed” he continued.

“u-urm, yeah a bit” you choked out, trying to swallow your nerves away. “maths is hard” you near enough whispered, not daring to look at him.

“hmm, that’s not good. is it?” he sympathised, which sent shivers down your spine. the deep tone in his voice made it sound more like a groan, one that you had daydreamed of frequently. you shook your head frantically in response, acknowledging his words but fearing what your mouth would blurt out. this was quickly noted by chan, who radiated confidence like you had never seen before. you felt him bend over, his mouth now level with your ear. “can’t you use your big girl words?” he whispered. “want me to help you?”

you gasped quietly at his seductive words and although you may be shy, you certainly are not stupid. his choice of words gave away exactly what he was offering you and as nerve-racking the experience may be, you were certain that a man as fine as him was going to know what to do in the bedroom.

and well, you were right.

“so when do you wanna get this out of the way with?” chan asked, snapping you back to reality. he noticed the dazed look in your eye, it was very apparent you were daydreaming about something. “thinking about last night?” he smirked, his hand now placed firmly on your thigh.

you tutted in response, “no actually, i wasn't”. you tried to suppress your emotion, considering his guess wasn't too far off what you were actually thinking about. “stressed” you explained in attempt to change the subject. his hand moved to your lower back, rubbing gentle circles to soothe you. although chan was strictly your fuck buddy and stress reliever, he always provided you with comfort when you needed it. “relax, y/n” he told you, “we’ll get it done and we will get a good grade for you”.

although he wasn’t the type of student that particularly cared about his grades, he at least tried to get a half decent grade - to some extent, at least. “can we meet up in our free period tomorrow?” you looked at him, wanting to get this stupid project over and done with. he nodded, secretly knowing it meant he would get some alone time with you.

“cool, thanks”, you smiled forgetting where you were for a second, too busy staring into the chocolate brown eyes next to you, until the loud ringing of the bell made you jump. you were relived to have an excuse to look a way from him.

without fail, every time you made eye contact with chan you were left with a pool of wetness between your legs - he knew it, too. he would stare at you, his head slightly titled back with his perfect pink lips begging to be kissed. he would lick his lips while staring at you, making them glisten in the most beautiful way possible. from his point of view, you looked desperate for his touch and he thrived off it. he often laughed at the expression on your face when you frantically deny that you aren’t turned on - you both know he can read you like a book.

you hopped off the lab stool before bending down to pick up your bag, making sure chan had a good view of your ass. you heard him chuckle, “already wet from a bit of eye contact?” he teased. you smirked as your back was facing him, not offering him a response to his question but rather throwing your hand up to wave him goodbye. most likely, you were going to pay for that behaviour later. chan made it clear from the very beginning that he wanted you to be verbal and most of the time you were, except the odd occasion when you felt bratty.

although you could count on chan to help with the project, ultimately you never split assignments with anyone 50/50. there had been one too many occasions of classmates fake promising you that ‘i’ll do it later!’, for you to fully relax. you headed towards your usual spot in the library, a table that was slightly hidden away amongst the endless shelves of books before setting your books down on the table.

you picked your phone up which led you to the realisation that only an hour had gone by. you sighed, throwing your head onto the table in frustration. this project was a lot harder than you thought it was going to be and will all due respect to chan, if you didn't understand, he wasn’t going to either.

your entire body had been screaming for you to go home and sleep for the past four hours, yet you refused and continued to sit there in complete and utter annoyance. it wasn't until the clock read 11pm that you decided enough was enough and picked your bag up with significant force, stress seeping from every inch of your body at this point.

when you arrived at your apartment you immediately ran to your bed, not bothering to change - sleep was your priority right now.

*buzz, buzz*

your eyes flickered open to the painful sound of your alarm, desperately throwing your arms around until you found the sounds source. you sighed, staring at your ceiling, contemplating if the pain of going to college was worth it after all.

forty-five minutes later you were ready and heading out of the door, ready for another day of stress. you felt your phone buzz in your pocket, smiling to yourself knowing exactly who it was going to be.

[08:49am] chan: still on for later baby girl?

[08:49am] y/n: yes

you thought by now you’d be used to the pet names he called you, but you sure as hell were not.

[08:50am] chan: ok. excited to see your little pretty face.

[08:51am] y/n: science project, remember?

you rolled your eyes in annoyance and shoved your phone back in your pocket. yes, as much as you wanted to ride chan’s face and be fucked into oblivion by him, you had other priorities right now. you barely slept last night because of this stupid project, the last thing you wanted was chan to be all over you when trying to complete it.

"you’re late” he teased you as you walked into the science lab where you agreed to meet. your eyes gazed at your watch, which showed 1:33pm. you scoffed, “hardly”.

you took out your laptop and textbook, tossing both onto the countertop next to chan, before making your way over to the stool to this right. he noticed your demeanour straight away, usually you would have apologised for being late - even if it was only three minutes - and you would have crawled to his side offering to make it up to him. he decided to remain quiet for the time being though, the longer your attitude lasted, the more reason he would have to get his way with you.

you opened up the textbook to reveal the notes you spent hours on last night. “you already started?” he queried, pulling the book closer to him with a confused look on his face.

“yes and it’s going to be a hard essay to write so we better get on with it” you noted, opening up a word document on your computer.

“and you started writing it?” he asked, this time in disbelief.

“only a few hundred words” you shrugged like it was nothing, even though it took you hours. he sighed, “its a project for two people, y’know?”

“yes chan, of course i know that. i was in the class with you when it was given, was i not?” you snapped at him, running your hands through your hair in frustration. he meant nothing by his words and you knew he was right, you probably should have waited to start it but your inability to cope with stress takes over you sometimes.

“attitude, y/n” he warned you sternly. alongside the rule of always being verbal and answering his questions, chan also had a rule against bratty attitudes. if he sensed an attitude on you, he would fix it via a punishment - something you were *somewhat* familiar with. the few times you were bratty it was usually because of how irritable you become when stressed. “was just saying”, he defended himself.

you ignored his warning, continuing with “you weren’t gonna be the one to do the background reading, were you chan?”.

once you made the mistake of turning to face him and realising he had an eyebrow raised at you and a dark look in his eye, you knew you well and truly fucked up.

“get on your knees” he ordered you, which for some reason, took you by surprise. you gulped, hesitating for a moment before he told you for a second time. “don’t make me ask three times, princess”.

you scrambled to the floor and placing yourself under the desk and in-between his legs. “what have i warned you about multiple times?” he asked, placing his finger on your chin, forcing you to look at his eyes.

“n-not to be a brat” you stuttered, his gaze making you nervous.

“that’s right” he hummed. “and what do you continue to do?”

“b-be a brat”, you admitted. with deadline season around the corner you hadn’t been able to help your attitude lately.

he nodded, appreciating your honesty. “now, i’m going to fuck that attitude right out of our mouth” he told you as he slowly lowered his jeans. “and you’re going to take it like the good girl i know you are. isn't that right?”

you nodded frantically and bit your lip, scared you may end up saying something you shouldn’t. “remember princess, you gotta be quiet otherwise we’ll end up with an audience” he warned you. “but something tells me my pretty little slut would like that” he hummed, running his hands through your hair before grabbing it in order to control your head. you instantly felt the heat rise in-between your legs as you listened to his filthy words.

you opened your mouth wide in anticipation for him, hoping it would work your way to his good side. he teased his member at the end of your mouth, knowing you probably wanted this more than he did. you felt his grip tighten on your hair as he pushed his way into your mouth with no warning. you battered your eyelashes up at him, hallowing your cheeks and trying to suppress your urges to gag.

“you like being used like this, don’t you” he groaned in a low tone. your mouth felt insane around him, there was no way he was ever going to get used to this feeling. you hummed in response, sending vibrations down his member and earning another honey glazed moan from him.

you tapped his leg and he pulled back, knowing that was your indication that you needed to breathe. you still hadn’t learnt to take him like this fully, his sheer size being too much for your petite mouth, but he loved the way your mouth looked so full as he thrusted in and out of it.

“god, look at you” he appreciated, “you're taking me so well after that bratty little outburst of yours” he groaned, his head rolling back in pleasure.

although you could hardly ignore the pool of wetness that was growing in your underwear, you were aware chan would catch onto any slight movements you made to try and release yourself. right now, you had to focus on your breathing and making chan cum.

although he was being careful not to be too rough with you, his pace picked up slightly as you drew him closer to the edge. you moaned around his member again, adoring the sight you saw above you. “fuck baby” he moaned, i'm gonna cum all over that tongue of yours”.

you wiggled in excitement at his words. you adored the taste of him (considering he ate exceptionally well), but you adored the fact that you were the one that made him feel that good.

his thrusts continued to pick up pace as you coughed slightly around him, but moments later he came undone all over your mouth. “hold it�� he told you as he bent down to pick you up from the floor. he did this a lot, he liked to watch and make sure you swallow his cum - otherwise there’d be another punishment over his lap.

you obeyed, waiting for his instructions. “okay, you can swallow”. you promptly swallowed his mess, opening your mouth wide to prove to him it had all gone.

“that's my good girl” he cooed, pulling you onto his lap into a gentler manner. “what’s with the attitudes, huh?” he asked. now he punished you, it was time to make sure you were actually okay.

“sorry, channie” you apologised, twiddling with your thumbs. “been really stressed. shouldn’t have taken it out on you” you admitted.

“yeah, you shouldn’t have” he nodded, “but it’s okay. feel better now?” he asked, brushing your hair behind your ear. you nodded in response, your stress levels now significantly lower. “talk to me properly next time princess. i’ll help you”

you agreed to approach him next time you felt like this, knowing it would be better for both of you. you placed a small kiss on his plump lips, hoping off his lap and sitting next to him - suddenly remembering someone could enter at any second. he giggled at you, considering you didn’t care if someone entered 5 minutes ago.

“thanks chan” you smiled at him, picking up the pen in front of you, ready to give this project another go.

“no problem princess. i like being your personal stress reliever”

#stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids fluff #stray kids smut #bangchan #bangchan x reader #bangchan imagine #chan imagine #chan smut #bangchan smut #chan x reader #stray kids bangchan

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skzshortcake · 4 years ago

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hiii this is a bit of a random request. i’m sorry if it’s bothersome! u can literally ignore it if you want. it’s just,,, i’ve had worst two weeks and my friends are all busy and i just,,, am constantly overworked and stressed bcs of uni (final year of uni fucking sucks) which idk i usually can handle but this whole week has been a disaster. i had 5 meetings. and i missed 2 of them, 2 assignments, 3 presentations and lectures. and on top of that i had to write an article for a magazine. there was just,,, so much due in a week and i got overwhelmed and kinda just,,, shut down. and to top it off, this morning i slipped in the shower (literally full on split on the floor) and my thighs hurt and i can’t walk or even sit without being in pain. and i can’t remember the last time i slept. i think it was two days ago. idk. i still have SO MUCH to do so i can’t sleep yet and i’m super stressed. oh gosh i’m sorry i’m rambling.

to get the point, i was hoping u could write a fluff piece with chan where the reader is stressed af like i am?? i usually read these to escape my head for a bit cause i’m a sucker for cute romance stories :’) it’d help a lottttt. but it’s okay if you can’t! 🥺 i’m sorry for bothering~

of course!! this might seem rushed so i’m sorry if it comes off like that- but i really hope it helps you!! i basically wrote chan into my interpretation of your situation, i hope that’s ok!! stay safe and take care bby! i’m always here if you (or anyone) needs to rant.

comforting surprises - bang chan

member: chan

genre: comfort/angst

warnings: anxiety and an overwhelming time, crying, not proofread

note: requests are still open, but it will take me a bit to get to them. i’m doing my best i promise but it’s kinda hard to write happy things for me right now.

ring... ring... ring...

chan hoped you would answer his call. he texted you earlier in the week and didn’t get a response, so he knew something must have been up. he anxiously rocked back and forth in the office chair he was sitting in, staring at the wall of his office while he waited for an answer.

a couple more rings in, he was about to hang up, but thankfully, you answered.

he heard you try and calm your breathing through the phone “hey.” you managed to say.

“prince(ss)? what’s wrong?” he immediately sat up, alert.

“it’s nothing,” you cry “i just-i just fell this morning and i’m a little busy.”

“ok, ok, can you tell me what’s going on? i’m on my way right now i’m not sure how long i’ll be.” he stood up and saved his work on the computer, hurrying to pack what was necessary in his black backpack to rush out the door.

“i-i,” you broke down in tears again “i have so much to do and i haven’t slept in days. i’m so behind on work it’s making me sick to my stomach...”

“ok, ok, i’m going to help you... can you breathe for me, baby? here, breathe in on the count of one and out on five, ok? i’ll count to eight for you.”

he started counting through the phone for you, knowing he probably looked crazy as he loudly breathed and counted on a phone call while speed-walking through the jyp building, but he couldn’t care less.

you were doing your best, truly, and he could tell, but you still couldn’t manage to take deep enough breaths to calm down.

“it’s ok, you’re doing so well for me, y/n... i’m on my way, i’ll be twenty minutes?” he says, waiting for your “ok” before helping you breathe again.

chan managed to get you to calm down a bit by the time he walked out of the building. he suggested that you go get a glass of water and sit down somewhere and wait until he got home.

“i’m ok, i’m ok now.” you sniffle, taking another sip of water and breathing heavily into the cup while you drank. “you travel safely please.” you told him.

“don’t worry, i will. are you going to be ok if i hang up now? i’ll be home soon, prince(ss).”

“mhmm.”

“ok, i’ll be fifteen minutes now. go sit down and rest please.”

he said goodbye and hung up, feeling even more worried for you. chan couldn’t help it, you’re his baby and he feels a responsibility to make sure you’re ok. he didn’t care if he had work to do or if he was busy, you were always his first priority.

he picked up some things for you from the downtown, practically checking his phone every thirty seconds to double check you hadn’t texted him again. he left just as soon as he arrived to make sure he wouldn’t make you wait any longer.

chan nearly dropped his keys as he fumbled with the door. he just wanted to see you as soon as possible.

“y/n?”

“hm?” your teary voice answered from the living room. you chose to sit down on the plush couch, only issue is you didn’t know if you’d be able to get back up.

“hey, i’m here now.” he set his bags down next to him while he sat down next to you. “can i hold you?”

you just nodded, feeling sobs build in your throat again. but you didn’t cry, you didn’t have the energy to cry anymore.

chan pulled you into a hug, knowing that he couldn’t do anything to make your work easier. “i’ve got you. it’s going to be ok.”

he let you stay there for as long as you needed. once you looked up at him with a defeated expression, he knew that it really must have been a difficult time.

“i’m so stuck.”

“honey, i’m so sorry. i’m sorry that things have been difficult, i’ll help you as much as you need, ok? we will figure it out, together. i promise.” he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead “i have something for you, baby.”

he leaned down and pulled out a bouquet of flowers and your favorite restaurant’s takeout. chan handed you the bouquet, and you noticed how he bought the flowers in your favorite color and even had the florist wrap them it thin decorative paper with a bow wrapped around it, also in your favorite color. he always excelled at attention to detail.

you felt the tears build again. “i love you so much. thank you.” you looked down to hide your crying from him. you felt so touched that he went to the extent to rush out and get your favorite food and flowers on a whim when he was in the middle of working.

chan truly had a heart of gold.

“of course, i love you so much too, prince(ss).” he put a hand on your cheek, not forcing you to look him in the eye if you felt overwhelmed, but letting you know he was there. “now, how about we eat some good food and get some good rest, and i will help you with your projects in the morning. it’s the weekend after all, you deserve to rest tonight. i’ll help you get to sleep.” he gave you another kiss and stood up to get some plates and utensils.

when he came back and served up your food, he turned on the tv and put on a show in the background. chan also didn’t forget to prop up your legs and get you an ice pack for your injuries.

“you will not believe what jeongin did today... he lost a bet and had to make breakfast this morning, and you can imagine how that turned out. we even gave him thorough instructions but he still managed to forget some of the ingredients and had to have help from the manager.”

chan joked with you and cheered you up, like he always did. you were pretty sure he was some sort of guardian angel for you, because he always showed you unconditional love and support, even when he was busy.

he was forever grateful for you and you were forever grateful for him.

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serowotonin · 4 years ago

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❝︎be mine❞︎ | valentine’s special

➽─ a love letters collab piece dedicated to @play90soi ─❥

#SYNOPSIS ❥ a letter of confession after nearly a year leads you back to a lost love.

#PAIRING ❥ ushijima wakatoshi x gn!reader #WORDCOUNT ❥ 1.3k #GENRE ❥ mostly fluff, maybe a bit of angst? exes to lovers #WARNING ❥ mentions of breakup, uh not well written emotions, unedited

#NOTE ❥ um it’s not the best but happy late valentines !! and i hope u like it<3

Dear L/n Y/n,

This Valentine’s would be the first we spend together as a couple and I’m hoping I will be able to make it memorable enough for you. Although we haven’t been together long, I have grown very fond of you over these last 2 months. Which is why I wanted to give you something special and personal for Valentine’s day.

I have never given anyone anything on Valentine’s day before so please forgive me if what I prepared wasn’t enough.

Honestly, I don’t know what to write in this letter. Tendou says to just write how I feel about you but my feelings are somewhat hard to describe.

If I think about it, I would say being with you is as fun as playing volleyball. They are different of course but as volleyball is a big part of my life, so are you.

You are easy to talk to and a generally engaging person to be around. There are many things about you I find curious and drawn to but all of those little things make you who you are and I am drawn to you as a whole.

I know I may not be as expressive as others but do know I care for you a great deal and do take notice of the little things about you. I may not show it outwardly though as I am unsure how to. The best example of this would be when you smile.

I don’t know how to react when you smile because it gives me an indescribable feeling I want to feel again when the moment fades. This is why I often bring you your favorite foods or snacks. It is to see that smile painted on your happy, cheerful face.

Hopefully, this letter too will bring a smile to your face.

Happy Valentine’s day Y/n. Thank you for being patient with me so far and thank you for being in my life.

Sincerely,

Ushijima Wakatoshi

You stared at the letter in your hand. This wasn’t your first time reading it, but funnily enough, you still felt all the same emotions as you did the first time around.

It was hard to believe that was two years ago, when you and Ushijima were experiencing the freshness of high school romance, and all the ups and downs that came with it afterwards.

Would you say you miss him? You did. But you two were on a break… a break that seems to be lasting nearly as long as the time you two were together.

It was for the best though. High school relationships barely made it past college anyways. You two were both busy people too.

Well, those were the same excuses you always used.

Excuses or not, you two weren’t together at the moment and although you may not want to admit it, it hurts.

It hurts even more once you realized tomorrow was going to be Valentine’s day.

First time spending it alone in a while… Oh well, no point in dwelling on it too much now. Might as well just go to sleep.

➽───────────────❥

Waking up to sunlight streaming through the cracks of your curtains would’ve been a great way to start the day was it not for the terrorizing shrieking of your alarm clock that accompanied it.

Tired, you moved one hand to shut the alarm as the other pulled off the blankets with a flourish.

Yes today was Valentine’s day, but it was also a Sunday, your day off.

After a satisfactory breakfast and shower, you draped yourself lazily on the couch thinking of anything you could do today.

‘There was that pile of mail from yesterday I could go through?’

And so you left the couch in favor of something more productive.

Pulling the pile of envelopes from the cupboard in which you stashed them, you brought them over to a nearby table and begun sorting through them.

Most were just the usual, coupons and bills. There were some advertisements littered through the pile too, and an envelope with familiar handwriting adorning the front.

You took in a deep breath, and opened the envelope. Unfolding the paper found inside, you were met with the same curves and strokes from the letter you read just last night.

Dear L/n Y/n,

How are you? It’s been a while since we talked to each other. It’s been even longer since we’ve seen each other last. I hope you are doing well, in both your studies and any other ventures you may have.

You might wonder why I sent you this letter after all this time and the truth is that I miss you. It took me a while to realize but I miss being with you. You were always a comforting force and my rest from volleyball and school activities.

I understand that we aren’t together now due to distance and the fact that we’re both busy people. I am not asking that we get back together because that in itself would have enough complications. However, if you’re willing, I would like to at least be able to spend a day with you.

Are you free on Valentine’s this year? Because if you are, I would like you to be mine again, if only for a day.

Sincerely,

Ushijima Wakatoshi

You read it once, twice, and once again. Were your eyes deceiving you or did Ushijima just write you a love letter, again, nearly a year after you broke up.

You looked at the date and saw this was sent to you almost a week ago, but since you didn’t collect your mail until yesterday you didn’t see it..

You started panicking slightly wondering if it’s too late to answer. It was still morning though. There was still time.

Rushing to find your phone, you opened your contacts and scrolled down to Ushijima’s name. Before you could think, you pressed call and held the phone to your ear, waiting for a response.

On the second ring, he picked up.

“Hello Y/n.”

“Hi.. Ushi,” you replied not quite sure what to call him. “Um I just read the letter you sent me and I’m sorry for the really late reply but yes.”

You heard a deep breath from the other end.

“Yes..?”

“Yes I am free today and yes I would like to be yours again.”

He didn’t say anything but you swear you could see him smiling through the phone.

“Then, shall I come over to your place?”

“That would be great. Thank you Ushi.”

“Thank you too Y/n. I’ll see you in a while.”

“Ok, see you.”

➽───────────────❥

As night grew and morning loomed close, it was time he left. Today had been enjoyable, more than that even, and you could tell Ushijima felt the same.

Goodbyes were difficult, this one seeming especially so. Standing at your door, he turned to face you.

He didn’t seem to know what to say and neither did you.

“I’ll be going now then. Goodnigh—“

“Wait, um, I know you said only for a day but really, I don’t think I want it to just be a day…”

He looked at you, eyes widened, and he smiled.

“I didn’t want it to be just for a day either.”

You smiled back, “Well, I guess we’ll figure something out then?”

“I’m free on Wednesday if you want to talk and figure it out,” he replied almost instantly.

“I think I’m free too. It’ll be a date then.”

He nodded and looked at the time, saying he probably should get going now. As he opened the door though, you snuck closer and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. You could see he practically melted at that but he didn’t say anything except for a goodbye and a goodnight.

You returned those before closing the door behind him and walking back to your room.

Laying on your bed a while later, you stared up at the ceiling.

You weren’t sure what the future would hold, but you knew you were looking forward to what’s coming.

#TAGLIST ❥ @lilikags @luna-in-luv

#ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu oneshot #hq oneshots #hq fluff #ushijima fluff #ushijima fic #ushijima oneshot #haikyuu ushijima #haikyuu fic #love letters collab #www.pink-ink.com/writing #/fic

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go-ldy · 4 years ago

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Riverdale 5x03

Man, I found this episode hard. There were some poignant moments, but there were also a lot of moments that were frustrating as hell. My emotions are mixed. But mainly sad. Hold me.

It really says a lot about this show that despite setting aside a whole episode dedicated mostly to character building and relationships rather than plot, it still felt like the show bit off more than it could chew. So much felt rushed including Bughead’s breakup.

anyway, the positives first:

Varchie were beautiful in this episode, and I am so happy for my Varchie mutuals for the care put into developing them and giving them this kind of send off (esp. considering the mess of 4x17 and 4x18). I loved how Archie’s flashback of his life over the last three years was just 90% about Veronica and how much she means to him. It especially contrasts to the BA “flashbacks” from 4x17 l o l.

Archie spontaneously deciding to join the army and shipping out on an actual bus 24 hours later was so Archie and so Riverdale. “Archie, there’s a war going on!” made me laugh out loud, IDK.

Veronica, Betty, and Jughead chasing Archie down in the jalopy to say goodbye was a sheer delight.

Betty Cooper: FBI trainee, default law enforcement officer, yearbook editor, serial killer genes, daughter of the black hood, sister of notorious killer Charles Smith - ALSO class Valedictorian! (Can u still be class Valedictorian if you were once suspended for cheating on a Quiz Show? Riverdale High says ‘yes.’) Good for u, B. Coop.

yessssss at Hiram Lodge being forced to put Sheriff Keller back into a job to arrest those kids hiding out at Archie’s boxing studio (and Archie didn’t notice that these youth were squatting there for months ?????? lmao). I KNEW RIVERDALE DID NOT HAVE A SHERIFF THESE LAST FEW EPISODES. Truly the lawless hellhole we have come to know and love.

Jughead staying in the Andrews’ home while it was put on the market to be sold was hilarious to me. I know it was supposed to be sad - and it was - but ALSO, can you imagine perspective buyers coming into the house only to find that there is a homeless person camping out in there without furniture or electricity or heat? “Why is there a rolled up sleeping bag in the corner?” “Is that a typewriter on the floor?” “Did I just step into an old can of soup?” JUGHEAD, MAN. They probably had to turn off the electricity and heat to save money because he was single-handedly keeping the house from selling.

It was very sad that Jughead was the only one who showed up at Pop’s a year later (and then sees a blonde girl come in and immediately his eyes light up because Betty before the disappointment o m g, murder me), but also a surprisingly relatable moment? I barely remember my own high school graduation, but I do remember that my high school friends felt like everything to me at the time, and I have since fallen out of touch with, uh, all of them. Life happens.

The stuff that was meh:

In theory, I am not opposed to the idea that Jellybean became the auteur/voyeur because she felt neglected and wanted attention, but it still feels like Jellybean is only about 25% of a character. Like, we heard a lot of other people (mostly FP and Jughead) tell us about JB’s motivations, but did JB have a single speaking line in this episode where she actually got to express to anyone what she was thinking and feeling? ugh.

I don’t care about Falice, but ????? @ FP’s solution to fix JB. So... taking her back... to her drug dealing mother who did not even show up for her own son’s funeral.... is better than a child therapist? Fine.

Nobody seemed to have any lingering reactions or trauma to Charles being a serial killer?? Like what. Is he even in jail? Or did Betty just let him go? This is actually quite inconvenient for me from a fic-writing perspective. Nobody is a better deux ex machina when Betty or Jughead need something in fic - just call their brother Charles who works for the FBI! I guess that’s done now.

I did feel for Alice, and Alice is not a character I usually feel for because she is the worst. But her husband and eldest son ended up being serial killers, Polly is in an insane asylum, the twins have disappeared from planet earth, and now FP is leaving her. Damn. That is a lot.

So did Choni breakup? It literally happened so fast with so little emotional fallout. Whatever, I don’t care about Choni.

The Beronica and Jarchie scenes were so rushed and forced. I just don’t get this storyline, y’all. What was the point of doing what they did with Betty and Archie in 4x17 and 4x18? Was it simply to break up our two main couples? Veronica and Jughead should have each had the time and space to be angry with their BFFs over what happened (because as crazy as this town is, it is still a massive betrayal) but instead they were both like: “NAH IT’S COOL SHIT HAPPENS LET’S HUG IT OUT.” It didn’t feel earned. I feel like RAS & Co. wanted the immediate drama of the ~kiss but also wanted to have this touching, Core 4 friendship moment before scattering them. What was the point. (I KNOW, I KNOW, ‘IT’S RIVERDALE’ but these characters matter to me ok and I want to understand where they are coming from.)

Bughead

This episode was... very hard. There were some cute moments, but the breakup felt so rushed and... empty? For the most part, we still have no idea where Betty’s head has been since 4x18. Presumably, she has been wracked by guilt, but terrified of telling Jughead the truth in case she ended up losing him (which, it turned out, was exactly what happened).

The scene in their bedroom where she tells him and they kiss desperately was a beautiful scene and the acting from both was oof. But I feel cheated that we did not actually get to see them talk about “us” as Jughead suggested. So did that conversation happen or not? And then to be told in a voiceover and montage that they grew apart in the space of about 45 seconds.... it was all very empty, and painful. I just.... :( :( :(

I guess we are supposed to assume that Betty and Archie’s kiss created this chasm between them that they were unable to talk about or address head on. But it was so rushed, very “tell not show.”

anyway, this stupid show has made me sad. I AM SAD. My heart is :( @ the unspoken hurt between them that they won’t talk about for seven years. And this show is never going to address the hurt between them in a realistic or satisfying way because it is Riverdale. Usually I would immediately reach to fic to get out my feelings, but in this case, I feel more like hiding in my zombie AU then dealing with how sad this all is lol. Is that insane? That’s what Riverdale does to us. I take heart in the fact that I am not alone in my madness.

#riverdale #bughead #riverdale 5x03 #riverdale negativity #riverdale spoilers #riverdale episode reaction #riverdale thoughts: I have them

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sly-merlin · 4 years ago

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Killing Me - 6 | n.y

pairing : law student!reader + yuta

genre : angst , mafia au/ arranged marriage au , smut

warnings of this chapter : use of few curse words. weapons

summary : “life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can . it is the only secret for living a regretless life.”

“ curiousity got the cat hitched”

taglist :: (not tagging the old ones because they have read it already bt if u want , lemme know! ) @yiyi4657 @sorrywonwoo @sillywinnergladiator @suhweo @exfolitae @minejungwoo

K.M masterlist

k.m 5 k.m 7

NOTE : K.M 5 WAS POSTED BUT IT GOT REMOVED FROM TAGS SO YOU CAN NAVIGATE FROM HERE!

“CONGRATULATIONS ON THE WEDDING MRS. NAKAMOTO!”

And yuta’s words kept ringing even when he was gone. Mechanically, your hands were balled into fists, anger rising. You were not feeling bitter at his words, for you didn’t expect anything better from him. But he shouldn’t have attacked your dignity in front of strangers.

only five minutes had passed and you were already encumbered with the weight of the ornament.

Your eyes were fixated on the place where yuta stood earlier. Each and every presence in the room could easily sense your aggravation for the man.

After a few more moments of silence, Kun took your hand in his, dragging you inside with him. You were startled at his sudden action but nonetheless tagged along.

“We are having brunch, whoever wants to eat can join us!” he announced whilst facing forward.

You both passed the open kitchen to halt at the big dining hall packed with a large table and what looked like countless chairs. It was just twin room of the hallway, with just more accommodation.

“The house doesn’t seem this big from outside though?” Kun chuckled as he set his eyes on your genuinely confused face.

“The ground floor has only two halls, kitchen and one other room. We skipped the backyard and just constructed this according to our needs. Big family, you know” he scanned the chairs and continued. “And we’ll add one more chair for you” you responded with only a tight lipped smile. He seemed to be content though.

Before you could converse further, your attention was diverted to the muttering of several boys, entering not so quietly into the room.

“Sit here, near my chair” Kun ushered you towards a chair. “I’ll be back with the food.”

A taller boy, maybe Jungwoo was the first to sit near you and greeted you with an electric eye smile which you tried to return with same energy. Everyone was scattered around the table by now. Some of them were glancing at you but no words were spoken.

You were about to distract yourself with your phone when Kun and another boy came back to the hall with two trolleys occupied with the food and plates. After plates were passed to everyone, delicious ttaekbokki ramyeon and tempura veges were served. the food looked mouth watering and hums of satisfaction confirmed your belief. you had just started eating when someone entered the room.

“Why is she sitting on my seat?

You stopped chewing hearing jaehyun’s voice.

“I told her to! And don’t use this tone again. Not with family at least!”

You could’ve paid heed to Kun’s sensible words but jaehyun seemed too keen on robbing you of any kindness.

“It’s just been a day and she is already replacing people here!” he remarked before sitting far away from his supposed seat.

“Jaehyun!” Kun’s voice was laced with an unsaid warning.

“Yeah, whatever.”

Despite being hungry earlier, you couldn’t swallow the food properly. You were not there to replace anyone .you were just as displeased to be in his presence as he was. But his displeasure for you was getting unbearable.

You were so engrossed in thoughts that you didn’t notice that everyone was already leaving with their plates. Kun and Johnny had noticed your hurt expressions at jaehyun’s words but there was so little they could do right now.

Under their studying eyes, you hurriedly tried to finish the remaining food.

“You should not move in today” taeil, whom you recognised from the first day, spoke.

“And why is that?” Johnny asked, pointing his chopsticks towards him.

“It’s just not a very fruitful day for moving in. that’s it” taeil replied with a serious expression.

“Now welcome to the 21st century grandpa! We don’t believe in superstitions devised when YOU were born!” Johnny snickered at the older.

“Ok do it! Don’t come to me later on. The legends are there for a reason.”

“I dreamt pigs the day I came across him anyway and I don’t think any spirit can be more evil than him!” as you finished, the four men started laughing hysterically.

“Y/n is such a match for me!”

But taeil quickly disapproved. “No, I don’t need two Johnny here.”

“I gotta go” taeyong announced. “Welcome to family y/n. I know this is not a very pleasant situation but it is what it is. You are welcomed here anytime and this place is yours as much as ours. Take care!” you merely nodded towards him. Were you supposed to show gratitude? You weren’t sure of that yet!

“So everyone I saw earlier lives here!” you asked Kun curiously. You weren’t sure to whom this place belonged and what exactly was this house. Their residential place? But why did they have a basement with metal doors then? It was better to just ask than assume.

But instead of Kun, taeil responded. “This house was designed by ten and doyoung to facilitate us with everything that wasn’t possible in the apartments we used to live earlier. Whilst looking like any posh dwelling in the area, it is not just that. The dining room might have provided you some insight already. My room is downstairs or I might say the only room on this floor in mine. Everyone else is settled on first and second floor. You can do a tour if you want. And if you want to stay here, I would love to displace Johnny outta his room and you can spend the night in mine.” his speech ended with a sincere smile.

“Whoa hyung!” Johnny exclaimed with eyes opened to infinity. “She didn’t ask for a lecture. And don’t waste your breath explaining that you have the best room in the whole world when we are short on time here!”

“Why is that now?”

“I have to drop y/n to her apartment. Whenever she is done with the food of course.” Johnny said pointing towards your plate. Sometime while listening to taeil, you had dropped your chopsticks again but continued again, muttering an apology.

“What’s the hurry? I want to talk to her!” Kun whined at Johnny.

“Then tag along but only if y/n wants!” both of them raised their brows at you, waiting for an answer.

“Yeah, of course you can come. Why would I refuse? “You chuckled at their childish tactics.

Once you were done with the food, Kun seized your utensils as you tried to get up with the plate.

“Wait for me. I’ll be back and then we can go” he announced going out of the room.

You sheepishly looked at the both taeil and Johnny who were now busy in their respective phones. Just when you were fishing out your phone from the pocket, it ringed, startling you.

Chelin.

You hurriedly excused yourself to the farther corner of the room ,ready to get a scolding from her.

“Where are you?” you gulped at her cold voice.

“I’m –I had to-

“You moved out right. Your desk is clear. And you lied to me” her voice was laced with frustration. You could imagine that she was on the verge of pulling her hair. “You know what! Don’t talk to me again!” and with that she hung up.

You tried her number twice but she didn’t pick up. You knew she won’t be mad for too long. She was genetically incapable of doing that but still her being angry with you was not settling in.

“y/n!”

you gave up calling her and decided in favour of letting her cool down first. not like you had any other option!

“Are we going?”

“Yup and jaemin is going to join us.” you almost rolled your eyes at his mention. You couldn’t understand his interest in you but at least he was harmless, not like yuta.

As you four reached the large parking space, taeil went inside again saying his goodbyes. Now you were all waiting for jaemin to come outside but the boy was nowhere in sight.

“I’m here!” jaemin chimed but he was not alone. There were two other boys with him which he had tried to introduce earlier.

“I was packing some food . Jungwoo hyung told me that -

“Chit-chat in the car! Let’s go!” Johnny scolded them.

With few adjustments, you were on the road. The position of jisung and chenle appeared quite pitiful. Due to lack of space, they both were practically sitting on each other. Jaemin forced them to converse with you which turned out pretty nice for you.

All the three boys were techies or the backbone of the team, as jaemin exaggeratedly explained to you. And they were younger as well. Talking to them was easier than you thought. And surprisingly they had many budding questions about your studies as well which were happily answered by you.

You were so engrossed in your little exchange that none of you released you were already there. You checked the time and it took about thirty minutes of drive including the traffic to reach there.

“Oh shit!” your face dimmed on realisation. “It’ll take about an hour to reach university from here!”

Kun and Johnny faced each other with shocking faces. Johnny slowly mouthed something to Kun before he chuckled “I think taeyong totally forgot that you are a student. Taeyong tends to do that. He’s very stressed out lately but I think you’ll love this place. I’ll park the car and Kun will take you to the apartment and others will help me with the boxes.” Johnny instructed everyone like a boss.

“Saved it!” Johnny whispered to Kun with a smug smile.

“Oh did you!” Kun shook his head in disbelief and stepped out of the vehicle.

You looked up to see the skyscraper in its whole glory, hand robotically shielding your eyes. The curved reflective glass windows were gleaming, you wished your room would also have that beautiful glass balcony, reflecting the sun.

“you’ll have plenty of time to gawk!” Kun practically dragged you by your elbow, towards the elevator.

“It was Johnny right.” you said quietly as Kun pressed the button to 10th floor.

“Yesss. he chose the place but he really put some effort in this task.” you couldn’t help but smile at him.

“Here we are!”

As you exited the lift, three doors met your sight, one facing you, while others opposite to each other. Kun headed for the right now, you following behind.

“I’ll set up the smart locking system in your phone for the keypad. Everything from mail room to amenity access is controlled with this single pin so remember it. 2610 is the code but you can change it whenever you want.” you nodded consuming the information.

The front door to your new shelter was opened and you were left in awe at the first sight. The entry was narrow but you could see a big living room at the end of it. You removed the shoes following Kun.

Your eyes shimmering, moved everywhere as a smile crept up your face.

The hall was big, at least for two people it was! If you could somehow drag the single seater sofa towards the half glassed window, you don’t think anyone would want to move from there. The rustling of the city could be seen from up there. Down there, a small portion of the park attached to the building was also visible. you were practically attached to the window still by now.

Kun noticed. He noticed how how eyes turned lively as you beheld your surroundings. His own lips curved up watching your reaction.

“Do you like it?” Johnny voice quizzed. Your suitcase now placed besides him. Chenle, jisung and jaemin trailed behind him with boxes in their hands.

“Yes, I love it actually!” you voiced your joy, leaving the hall windows.

“I’ll help” you offered but before you could actually do something, they left like the wind.

“Let’s explore” Kun suggested.

To the right of the hallway was the semi-open kitchen as half of it was covered with a wall but the other part was visible from the couches. The kitchen was itself very sophisticated but poor thing you won’t be cooking any five star recipes in there.

The small space between hallway and kitchen led you towards two rooms. Good thing they were hidden from the sight.

“You can choose your room but I’d prefer this one!” as he opened the left door, you knew what he meant. The scenery you beheld outside could also be seen from this room. The sliding glass door lead to a small balcony opening to the same view. The room itself was very decent just like the rest of the place.

There was a desk with a bookshelf on the upper side of wall which made you confused about Kun’s previous statement. “How could Johnny forget that I was a student but still remembered about these things.” you asked pointing towards the study space.

“His involvement was only till the real estate stuff. Everything else is planned by me so I’m ready to accept some gratitude.”

You let out a small giggle, thanking him immediately.

“Unfortunately, there is only one bathroom. 2b2b apartments are harder to find and there was no need for three bedrooms so you’ll have to compromise here!” he explained pursing his lips. You nodded your head at him while opening the door to the bathroom. To say it was beautiful would be an understatement. It was twice the size of your dorm bathroom. from shower enclosure to bath tub and sink, everything was made of ceramic and marble.

“Hey come out! Where are you both?” you heard Johnny’s screaming voice. You and kun both rushed towards the sound.

“Should I keep the boxes in the room?”

“Yeah, thanks, this one!” you pointed to the left room. He smirked at your choice, winking your way.

Finishing the task at hand, you all slouched down on the couches. Even if you didn’t move a limb, you were just exhausted by other activities of the day.

“I’m hungry!” chenle groaned stroking his stomach.

“What are you?? Even a whale has some control you insatiable boy!” jaemin scolded him, making everyone laugh.

“Call me whatever. But can’t I have some from the box. Just a little!” chenle pleaded giving him an eye smile.

“That is for noona. And you aren’t getting anything!”

“What is he talking about?” you inquired after you were mentioned.

“Jeno told me you don’t cook so I got you the leftovers for dinner. The container is in the kitchen. heat them and eat them!” jaemin replied nonchalantly like it was nothing big. But it was meaningful gesture, for you.

So you didn’t hold back this time. “That’s so kind of you, thank you!” you said smiling to him. “And feel free to eat chenle. Go help yourself.”

Chenle grinned like a happy child but was met with a pointing finger of jaemin. “Get a grip!” And he slumped down further into the cushion, grumpily crossing his arms over his chest.

“By the way y/n.” Kun addressed you, searching out for something in his pockets, that something, you discovered, were the keys.

“People usually don’t need keys for separate rooms when they live together but you are a special case, so you might need these.” you nodded knowingly, taking the jiggling set from him.

“Let’s watch some t.v before going. The first thing that I did was setting this up and there’s a gaming system attached as well.” Johnny announced before leaving his place to locate the remote under the TV system.

Squatting in the middle of the bed, you looked at the deep blue boxes with a twisted face. Unpacking these boxes would certainly be a chore.

Were you any eager to do it? No.

Was it essential? Very.

You pouted and slumped on the silky white sheets, the queen sized bed providing you with the enjoyment of being a starfish, for the first time in forever. It felt nice and cosy. Unknowingly, your lips curved a bit, releasing a sigh of content.

You couldn’t say for how much longer, but the feeling of having a home brought tranquillity to your muddled thoughts. You have always dreamt about buying your own house, having a place you would be enthusiastic to come back to!

But this was not reality. This was just an intermission to the life you were heading towards! A timeout. And it would just end in smoke, with no accurate termination.

You raised your left hand to view the small diamond resting on your finger. It was beautiful, meant to be worn by a real bride, someone whose ring didn’t came with an expiration date.

Shaking your head, you pushed yourself off the comfortable position. You couldn’t spend your day in melancholy whilst that yuta was probably plotting something to make your life miserable and organising yourself would be the first step towards preparation of retaliation. So you got up from the soft bed to look through the boxes. You picked up the box with some of your random stuff and staggered towards the bathroom.

If there was a place you’ll love more than the room, that’d surely be this bathroom. but so was the hallway!

Even after placing everything from your hair products to the sanitary ones, the ceramic cabinet over the sink still looked empty. You decided to buy some things only to fill that up! Though you were swamped with work right now, you couldn’t resist looking at the frameless rectangular mirror. it was dreamy! and you felt it was a nice ego booster for you as well!

One by one, within one and a half hour, you cleared all the boxes and orderly arranged everything into the cupboards and closet. The only thing left was your desk space but it could be delayed.

You flopped on the couch tiredly, wanting nothing more than to sleep. But there was one more thing on the checklist.

Chelin.

You looked at her contact, tapping your foot constantly and when you knew there was no enough courage in you, crossing your legs on the sofa, you dialled her number.

“Hey!” a male voice answered the phone instead.

“Um jay, where is chelin? Can you tell her it’s me!” you said sheepishly, trying to sound as innocent as possible.

“I don’t think she wants to talk right now. And why did you ran away?”

All your anxiousness suddenly left your body at the overstated accusation.

“I didn’t run away jay, who told you that!” and you were trying to be serious here!

“Nobody told me that. I can figure common things out, you know. Your stuff is gone and you didn’t inform chelin whilst doing that. So imma assume-

“My winter clothes are still there, dumbass. Just give the phone to chelin so I can explain.”

“Nope, she’s in bathroom and angry but for you, only you, I’ll try, to make your position better if you buy me lunch tomorrow!” you scrunched your nose, imagining him doing his sly brow lousy thing with a smug look. But the deal looked good. So you just hopped in.

“ok.” and before you could say anything, he cut the phone. Annoying brat!

and it was also favourable that you were easily distracted for as soon as you turned the TV on ,you got lost in another world, forgetting all the worries for a while.

Your irrational fear of sharp microwave beeps was the reason you were eating the bland ttaebbokki right now. Cold food is the best food had already left the chat as you opened the lunch box. You didn’t enjoy the delicacy earlier due to certain someone and now you couldn’t appreciate it because of your own heightened senses. The ramyeon was a saviour, ttaebokki, on the other hand was now in a contest with the double caramelised candy that could not be chewed even with metal teeth.

You have spent about 4 hours watching t.v and it was already eight. Your desk was yet to be decorated with books and stuff, still your brain cells favoured watching two movies that would’ve made no sense in real life, but like you always say, who cares! And now you were watching some random football match. Just as you were about to scream at the goal, the front door closed with a thud.

You placed the food down on table, craning your neck above the back of the sofa, looking for the intruder.

Yuta. You had totally forgot about your so called roommate!

“Do you think the food would settle down in your gut?” he took long strides to reach you and asked with a quirking brow.

You turned around to focus on the food instead. But with the slight dip in the head of sofa, you could feel his presence hovering over you.

“Why wouldn’t it!” you replied with equal affection. “And I’m avoiding you so it’s better if you keep yourself on silent mode as well.” You said again with a hint of finality in your unwavering voice.

Whilst you were trying to direct your attention towards the t.v. in an attempt to ignore him, you felt his warm breath fanning against your ear. You nervously swallowed the bite you took earlier, hoping he would just go away instead of being so inquisitive.

“But I’m willing to make peace here and you are being so harsh to me. you should respond when I talk to you” your shoulders tensed at the fake pout that you assumed he was wearing now, just to get under your nerves. His expressions might have been cordial but you got the innuendo in his words perfectly.

You placed the food container on the table again. “If we have to live together get one thing in your head! I’m here because of you! So don’t try to act up like you are the boss of me! And I don’t agree with your idea of peace if it involves the death of my dignity.” you kept your cool but irritation was radiating from your body and you hoped he would get the message and leave you alone.

“Oh wow!” yuta chuckled a bit before walking around to sit beside you. Instinctively, you shifted towards the other end of the couch. “You think you are the only one who-

His eyes followed your movements as you rolled your eyes, blatantly disregarding him in favour of leaving the couch. But he was quick as he pulled you down by your wrist, causing you to yelp in discomfort.

“You think you are the victim and sufferer here!” he leaned closer, his hand still on your wrist, his attitude changing. That’s when you smelled some alcohol on him. “You think you can deal with anything, catching a criminal red handed and living the life of glory as someone who bravely handled a dangerous situation where anyone else would have cowered away. But guess what!” his voice rose at the end and nostrils flaring with every syllable. “You are the most foolish person I’ve ever met. You have not only ruined your life but mine too. Why couldn’t you have walked past that day like any other person? Everything was fool proof from cctv to police, but you had to intrude!”

You bit the inside of your cheek as your breath quickened. He was staring right into your eyes but the intensity in his orbs unabled you to look away. He could sense your building anxiety but he still continued. “And now I am fucking suspended for a month due to your stupidity. Taeyong told me I’ve become a risk to them. Do you know how it damn feels when your own family fucking doubt you? They questioned my abilities all because of you. I’m-I’m unsure of myself only because of you. I can’t go back to my house, my job, my brothers! why can’t you just fucking leave!” yuta’s chest rose and fell with rapid breaths as he stood up, leaving your wrist with a jerk. His grip wasn’t that tight but it still left a stinging pain.

You watched him while rubbing your wrist as he raked his hand through his hair, apparently controlling himself. his other hand was shuffling for something in his pocket.

A loud gasp echoed in the hall as yuta’s hand moved and he aggressively stabbed a knife into the table. And it was not a normal kitchen knife!

“Just fucking leave!”

and with that he was gone.

as you heard the bedroom door closing ,you let out a harsh breath, shoulders slumping in relief.

You eyed the weapon that has damaged the classy wooden table.

Taeyong had assured you that yuta won’t harm in you in any way but his actions were speaking another language!

but for now all you could feel was….fear?

earlier in black neos estate-

“You can’t stay here forever, you know” mark’s words pulled yuta back to reality. As much as he wanted this nightmare to end, he knew there’s wasn’t even a slight chance of odds being in his favour.

“But there is nothing that can’t be delayed!” yuta shot back at him, chugging his beer.

“You can leave tomorrow. Half of the place is empty, you can easily sneak in!”

“You want me to hide in my own house?” he snorted at younger.

“No. I meant-

“Besides yong gave me clear instructions to make peace with that women which includes breathing the same air as hers and I’m going to follow his command like a happy puppy I am!” he let out a chuckle towards the end, making mark gulp in panic. “And I gotta transfer my stuff tomorrow and you’re going with me.”

“Not until 8 in the evening. We are going for a weapon exchange in the afternoon.” mark said taking sip of the drink. Some questions in his head still needed to be answered but he was lacking right words. Yuta was already on edge since the whole fiasco started and mark, in no way wanted to trigger him anymore. “What are you going to do, if I may ask?” he questioned hesitantly.

“Nothing for now. I went to her university and all I have till now is that she is extremely close to her friends. Maybe have a thing for hook-ups, can’t be sure though. In her head, she is too smart and can surmount anything. That day in the basement proved it already. she isn’t fearless, in no way she is but still she manage to fight back with that rising panic, I don’t know how!” he paused to look at mark, biting his lower lip to cover a smile creeping on his face. “With her whole strength, she tries to pretend that she isn’t frightened down to her soles but whenever I’m near her, he-her throat tightens. It-it’s like she forgets the whole process of exhaling.”

Mark’s mouth went dry hearing that.

“Hyung!” he addressed yuta, almost losing his grip at the beer. He was in no way being intimidating but mark was feeling apologetic for him.

“What now?”

“How closely have to observe her? You sound like a stalker hyung!”

“Don’t call me that.” he slapped mark’s back lightly. Had he applied a little of his strength, he would have been lying on the ground floor right now! “Maybe I read her file more than a couple of times to just create some familiarity but she’s, hmm, how to explain it! Maybe authentic! But I did nothing creepy though and even if I did, those marriage papers cuts out everything” he chuckled again and it was now concerning mark. he was not drunk but was still laughing too much for it to be normal.

“I’ll suggest just leave it be! Haven’t you thought that she was just at wrong place at wrong time?”

“No!! the problem is that she still somewhere in her head thinks that she was at wrong place at right time! I would’ve had no problem if taeyong had just let her go but no !! he has to go and make my life miserable.” his soothing voice rose a few octaves. He was frustrated and had no other way of letting that go.

Mark watched him, looking into the sky, like he was finding some solutions. He couldn’t turn around the time nor he could do anything for yuta.

He tried to focus on the sky instead. It was so quiet, but what that silence engulfed in it was a mystery for now.

the stars looked beautiful, almost poetic, for the time being.

************************

HOPE YOU ALL ARE ENJOYING IT! MY WRITING IS NOT THE BEST BUT I’M TRYING TO IMPROVE! THANK YOU FOR READING.

#nct scenarios #nct imagines #nct fluff #nct x reader #nct mafia #nct arrange marriage #yuta scenarios #yuta imagines #yuta mafia #yuta arrange marriage #yuta angst #nct angst

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beautifulchaostrash · 4 years ago

Note

Hi! could I get some fluff with Lester Sinclair and a female S/O? like a date, they go to the woods to search for animal bones and other cool stuff that can be found in the forest and at some point they get lost because they were too distracted being adorable? thank you so much!!!💞💞💞💞 love ya! hope you're doing well💞

A Paisley Afternoon

Lester Sinclair x Fem!Reader

SFW, mentions of abuse, swearing

Word count: 4,884

assasdjhajfsgawgeu you are SO sweet! QwQ I hope you’re doing good as well!

Quick disclaimer: I have not seen the House of Wax, and I haven’t really written for the Sinclair brothers that much, so if their characterization seems off plz let me know! This was hella fun to write and I’m super glad you requested this! (I’m also lowkey simping for Lester Sinclair, what have u done to me)

I know u asked for fluff and while this mostly is, I made the ending kinda angsty cause I can’t help myself...T-T but it has a happy ending tho

cut because this is a loooong ass fic

“S-so uh, Y/N! V-Vinnie asked me to uh, go get some stuff from the forest, ya know, for his artstuffs? And uh, ‘was wonderin’ if you wanted to come with, since yer a big fan of nature and stuff, heh. I-if you don’t that’s ok I understand I-”

You silenced his nervous rambling with a kiss on the cheek.

“I’d love to! Could we make it a picnic? I don’t get to cook for you often,” you hummed.

Lester blushed a deep red. “Y-yeah if you wanna, I’d love that...uh, m-meet you at our usual spot? Four pm?”

“I’ll see you then!” You gave him a chaste kiss on the lips before turning to go back into the house.

He gawked for a minute before jogging down the porch steps, stammering his goodbyes. He drove off as if he had gotten de-pantsed during gym class and was retreating to hide out his shame in the locker room.

...

He would never call this a date. Not in a million years. After all ‘Dates are s'posed to be nice and fancy, and if there’s one thing I ain’t it’s that!’. Lester’s self-deprecating humor came back in your mind as you sat on the edge of the boarded-up well. The well served as your go-to meet spot for these kinds of outings.

Even though you had both been dating for years, Lester always treated every date as if it were his first. As if he couldn't believe that you wanted to spend time with him. It broke your heart to think about, but it was sweet in away.

Every time he came up with an excuse. ‘Bo wants me out of the house for the evening'...'We need more parts for the House of Wax, and I need some help'... 'You’ve spent a lot of time inside lately, you should go on a walk'! And I’ll come with to protect you in case people come by.’ But you knew better.

You knew that Lester was too nervous to ask you outright. You’re snapped out of your daydream by the slam of a car door. Looking up to see Lester jogging towards you, Jonsey following close behind.

“S-sorry I’m late! Lost track of ti-...Y/N! How many times have I told you not to sit on that well!?!” he picked up his pace, sprinting to where you sat.

You sheepishly stood up, not noticing that you had been leaning on it in the first place.

“Sorry sweetheart, guess I jus’ got tired,”

He pulled you into a tight hug, then pulled away to check your body for injuries. He was like a flustered mother goose, almost.

“That well is ancient, why it-it was 'prolly here before Bo and Vinnie were even born! If you p-put too much weight on it, it could-”

“Collapse and I could get hurt, I know, I know. Gah! You worry too much darling,” You stood on your tiptoes to press a kiss into the bridge of his nose.

He stood back and put his hands on his hips, eyeing you up and down.

“Why I oughta-” He wagged a finger in your direction.

“What? You oughta what? What’re you gonna do huh?” you smirked and leaned into him, tilting your head.

“I oughta…” He trailed off at your sudden challenge, blushing hard.

His eyes widened and a mischievous grin spread across his face.

“I oughta kiss you, fer being so reckless!” He crossed his arms.

You giggled and put a hand over your forehead. “Oh no! What a tragedy! Forced to kiss the most handsome man in the world! Whatever shall I do???”

You sank to the ground and leaned against Jonsey, putting a hand to your forehead. Lester looked down at his feet and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Aww shucks!” He muttered.

You jumped up, wrapping your arms around his waist and ghosting your lips against his. Lester pressed his hands against your waist and closed the distance between you two. You stayed connected for a moment, savoring the tangy taste of sweat and dirt on your tongue. You only broke away when you heard Jonesy snuffling around in the picnic basket you brought with. After shooing her away from your food, Lester went back to his truck to gather his bag, and you were both on your way.

You and Lester walked through the forest, taking your time to pick your way for the undergrowth. Even though you both did this often, and usually traveled the same path each time, you never failed to find stuff.

Jonesy, not learning her lesson from the last time, went after a badger and got her ass kicked again. Leading to a very angry rant from Lester, even though she couldn’t understand what she was saying.

Even though you were looking for animal bones, anything was game. From discarded beer cans to cool looking rocks, weird plants, whatever you managed to find.

You both stopped in a small clearing, the trees were sparser here and the grass a bit taller. A perfect place for treasures to hide. Lester beamed, moving to start sifting through the vegetation. You set your basket down nearby and followed suit, hiking up your pant legs to avoid the mud.

A few minutes and a couple of oddly shaped rocks later, Lester called out to you. He showed off a very excellent stick, that was a bit shorter than him and looked thick and sturdy. He handed it to you, proclaiming that it was going to be your 'wizard staff'.

“Wizard staff?” you chuckled, grabbing the stick from his hands.

“Why yes! You are the most magical person I’ve met! You’ve got to be some sort of powerful enchantress! Sein' as you’ve put a spell on my heart~” he smiled and grabbed you by the waist, leaning down to kiss you.

You gasped when he pulled away, blushing at his cheesy comments. You sure as shit weren’t gonna let him get away with it without firing back with some of your own.

“That’s funny, seeing as you’re the one who’s charmed me~” you whispered in his ear, your breath hot on his sensitive skin.

You spun around and stooped down to pick through the grass, ignoring his flustered gaping. He smiled and kneeled next to you in the dirt, enjoying the silence of the forest.

You both trek on for another hour or so, before finding a level area near a creek to collapse and have lunch. You made quick work, unfurling the blanket and setting out the food. You tossed a few treats towards Jonsey to make sure your meal wouldn't get sacrificed.

You fell onto the ground with a thud, letting your aching muscles relax. Even though it wasn't hot out, the humidity made doing anything outside torture. You don't know how Lester managed to do it every day.

“You need to eat, here d-drink some water,” he pushed a canteen into your hands along with a sandwich.

“Water?” Taking a swig from the canteen, you smirked. “Why, I think you have more than quenched my thirst, gorgeous~”

Lester went red from ear to ear as he realized that you were ogling his backside while he rummaged around in his bag. He flushed and sat down next to you, suddenly very invested in the ham sandwich in front of him. You finished your sandwich and leaned against his shoulder. Lester blushed and started stammering. You silence him with a kiss, one hand moving to cup his cheek, the other moving to his chest.

He reciprocated, wrapping his arms around your waist and deepening the kiss. His lips slid against yours, chapped and sweaty, and tasting faintly of blood. It was more than gross, it was ghastly, repulsive even, and yet so so addicting. Every time you think you get enough of him he leaves you yearning for more. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought him to be a succubus or some kind of land-dwelling siren.

But nope, it was just Lester. Lester bringing you gifts in the form of wildflowers, pretty rocks, and books. Lester giving you full-throated, heartfelt praise and sappy comments. Lester giving you more passion and love and charm in one smile than anyone else could give you in a lifetime. Bo may be a smooth-talking seducer, but Lester? Lester was straight up husband material, and it made your heart melt.

And it made other things melt as well, you realized as you were craving more of him. You opened your mouth slightly, pushing your tongue on his lips to savor more of that sickly sweet taste. He obliged you, parting his lips to brush your tongues together. Straddling his waist, you press your body against his, leveraging a more intimate kiss.

He gave out a small groan, which only spurned you on further. Your hand reached down to pull at the hem of his shirt, when his rough hands gripped your hips and pulled you off of him.

“Not in front of Jonesy!” he hissed into your ear.

You couldn’t help but laugh at the notion.

“Jonsey? Babe, she’s just a dog she doesn’t care what we’re doin’, she doesn’t even understand what sex is!”

He puffed up , a bit offended by your words. “She is not jus’ a dog, she is an innocent creature and does not deserve to be exposed to that kind o’ stuff!”

You snickered again, conceding defeat. “Alright alright, but you owe me, mister,” you teased.

He smiled and kissed the top of your head as you snuggled into his side.

“Don’ worry bout a thing darlin’, I always pay my debts,”

You both relaxed, exchanging kisses and occasionally commenting about work, or the weather. After a while, you both decided it was time to move on, and you packed up camp.

As you stopped to refill the canteens from the creek, your eye noticed something odd in the water.

Upon closer inspection, you realized it was a very smooth rock. You, of course, fished it out to take home with you. Only then did you realize what about it that had caught your eye in the first place. The rock itself was a dark color, flat, and about the same circumference as a small wine bottle. Right smack in the middle of the rock was a hole going clear through to the other side.

Your jaw dropped. It was a hag stone. You had heard of them before but had never expected to ever find one naturally occurring. They were ridiculously rare and only formed under specific circumstances. Even though it seemed to be a bit silly, you mentally thanked the forest and the creek for giving you such a gift. “Lester!” you called out. “Come look at what I found!”

You ran over to him and dropped the stone into his palm. His eyes widened, his fingers running over the smooth surface, tracing the round hole.

“You found this in th’ creek?” he held the stone up to his face and peered through the hole curiously.

“Yeah! It was just sitting there,”

“Well I’ll be, I never seen anything like it!”

“They’re called Hag Stones! It's rumored they hold powerful magic, since they're only created through natural means,”

Lester hummed and pushed the stone back into your hands.

“That’s a real hell of a find y/n!” He smiled.

You palmed the rock, thinking for a moment. An idea popped into your head.

“Say Lester do you have any rope or string?” you asked.

He nodded and went to retrieve it from his pack. It was a small bundle of thin para-cord, stolen off some unfortunate tourist.

“Perfect!” you beamed.

Taking the loose end, you compared the length to your neck to gauge it, then took a small pocket knife and cut the rope. Looping one end through the hole in the rock, then tying both ends in a secure knot. Beckoning Lester to lean down, you looped the necklace over his head, leaving it to rest on his neck . He looked down at it and smiled.

“When Hag Stones are worn around the neck like this, they make the wearer pretty much immune to curses and bad luck. It’s even said that if you look through it, you’ll be able to see into the kingdom of the Fae Folk! And because we found this one in the forest, it grants you favor with the tree spirits!” you bit your tongue and blushed, realizing how silly and hippy-dippy you sounded.

“‘Course that’s just all legend, but it is still pretty though, and I think it suits you nicely.”

Lesters’ eyes widened, and he tried to lift the stone from around his neck. “I can't! Y-you need this more than me!”

You snatched his hands from the cord and laced your fingers in his, shrugging.

“You deserve it baby, you deserve to be protected. You deserve to be happy and loved too! I’m plenty safe with you and Jonesy around. It’s your turn to be taken care of,” you leaned and pressed your forehead against his.

Reaching up, you rubbed his cheek, surprised when your hand came away wet. Looking up you saw that he was crying.

“Oh, Lester? What’s wrong sweetie?” you wiped away the streams of tears with your thumbs.

“N-nothing I just-” he closed his eyes and let out a choked sob. His hands came to rest atop yours. “No one’s ever t-told me that, that i d-deserve to be happy and s-safe!”

He burrowed his face in your shoulder and sobbed. You stood and held him there, rocking back and forth while rubbing circles on his back in through his hair. His arms gripped you tight enough to hurt, but you didn’t mind. Even as you cooed and shushed him, anger bubbled behind your soothing tone.

You were furious. Furious at his parents for treating him like he didn’t exist, at Bo for bullying him constantly, and at Vincent too. Even though Vincent wasn’t as nasty, he still brushed Lester off like a horsefly that wouldn’t leave him alone. When Lester tried to talk to him, show him something, even just say hi, Vincent would always sign the same things.

‘I’m busy,’

‘Go bother Bo,’

‘Lester please, I have a headache, be quiet,’

It made your blood boil and your vision go red. Yeah sure, Vincents’ mute and can’t eat or smile without his deformity causing him pain. Bo was treated like the devil incarnate by his parents in favor of Vincents’ artistic talent. But they had the same fucking parents. The same fucking childhood. The least they could do is treat him like something more than a piece of dirt. Some days you wondered if they even cared about him.

You snapped out of your ire when Lester pulled you into a tender kiss, lower lip still trembling slightly. You pulled back and planted kisses all over his face, on his nose, chin, eyelid, everywhere. He devolved into a fit of wet giggles, his nose crinkling as your lips tickled his handsome features. He wiped his eyes again and looked you in the eyes lovingly.

“I love you, Y/N,”

“I love you too, Lester,”

You smiled and gave him one final kiss. He beamed. Taking the stone, he held it up to his eye, peering through the hole at you.

“Well hey! Would’ya lookit that! I’ve already found myself a fairy! And a mighty cute one at that!~”

You giggled and pushed him away bashfully. “Go pack up the rest of our stuff ya goofball!”

>>>>>

Following the river, you continued to look for stuff along the winding trail. You snagged a pretty decent haul, all things considered. Animal bones and carcasses and rocks and some jewelry left behind by a camper. Nothing really out of the norm for the pair of you, and things were going great.

That is until you realize too little too late, that the sun had all but set, and left you in the dark with no idea of where you are. You tried to follow the creek down back the way you came and kept following it. And kept following it, and….

“Lester? I don’t recognize any of this…”

You hoped that Lester would put on his brave act and reassure you that yes, Y/n. He knew the woods like the back of his hand and that you would be home in no time. You did not get that.

“Yeah, me neither, I don’ know where the hell we ended up. It’s too dark for me to read my compass an’ I left the flashlights at Ambrose ‘cause I didn’t think we’d be out past dark,” Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone. “Ah, damn it’s dead! Knew I shoulda charged it before I left this morning! Did you bring yours?”

The lack of panic and fear in his voice made your skin crawl. How the hell is he so calm??? And no, you didn’t bother to bring your phone with you this time, not wanting to be annoyed with phone calls from work. Lester seemed to notice your mounting panic and quickly set about comforting you.

“Y/N! Y/n, dont be upset, we’ll be ok! You got me an' Jonesy here to protect you. I’m pretty sure that this creek leads to the main road, and we can follow the road back to Ambrose. You have extra food in that basket right?”

“Uh, yeah, treats for Jonesy, some apples and an extra sandwich I think, and we have water in the canteens still,”

“Alrighty then, If worse comes to absolute worse, we’ll make camp for the night in the forest. Then I can make a fire and we’ll head out in th mornin' when it’s light out, ok? Hey…” He reached out and put a hand on your shoulder. “We’re gonna be ok.” he said with an air of finality, putting you somewhat at ease and strenghtening your resolve.

You continued to follow the creek, holding hands so you wouldn’t get separated. You walked on for what seemed like hours, but eventually, you came across the road Lester talked about. You would’ve cried out for joy if you weren't so goddamn tired. You hadn’t realized how far you went into the forest. Lester stepped out into the middle of the road and looked towards the sky, looking for something. You stepped out and looked up with him. You gasped at the sight of the sky. You had never seen so many stars in the sky before. Well, that’s a lie, Lester took you stargazing often, but it still stole your breath every time.

“Fuck” he whispered under his breath. “It’s a new moon,”

“Why’s that bad?” you asked.

“Can’t tell which way east is, ‘least not very easily,” he muttered.

He scanned the sky further, peering at it with an intense stare. Even though you were horribly, horribly lost, you were happy to be able to spend time with Lester. A little bit of impromptu stargazing was also a plus.

“Jesus, you think after a while i’d start to remember to bring the flashlights, huh? Guess you can’t teach an old dog new tricks,” He chuckled.

You reached out for Lesters’ hand again, squeezing it gently. He continued to curse under his breath before giving up on whatever it was he was looking for. “Y/N, I’m really sorry this turned into such a shitshow, I-”

“It’s ok pumpkin, shit happens sometimes. The only thing we can really do is try to do better next time,”

“Yeah, I guess,”

You both stood there staring at the sky, not knowing what to do or where to go from here. So you stood, and stared at the sky, in the middle of the road, like a couple o’ crazies.

You were so lost in thought that you didn’t notice the car approaching you in the road. A door slammed, jarring you out of your stupor. You rubbed your eyes, stuggling to adjust to the birghtness of the headlights. You heard a voice call out.

“Lester? Jonesy?” it was Bo, of all people, and he seemed to be somewhat concerned for once in his goddamn life.

“Yeah we are we, just got,” Lester was cut off, the worry vanishing from Bo in an instant once he realized you guys were ok.

“WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!? IT’S ALMOST ONE IN THE FUCKING MORNING AND YOU GUYS SAID YOU WOULD BE BACK AT DAWN!!!” he roared. “You haven’t been answering your phone Lester, and YOU, for whatever fucking reason, decided to leave yours at home, what in the fuck happened?!?”

“We got lost,” Lester shrugged.

“Lost?” he hissed. “Fucking lost? Let me guess, asswipe didn’t bother to bring flashlights did he?” Bo asked you, sarcasm and venom dripping from his voice like sour honey.

He was about to launch into another bought of cursing, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. Bo whipped around to face his twin, who signed something quickly. You couldn’t make it out in the darkness, but whatever he said, it pissed Bo off.

“Don’t you fuckin’ ‘Bo’ me, I’m tired of this lardass going ‘round ‘causin trouble!” He whipped towards you and jabbed his finger in your face. “And you! You-”

Something inside you snapped. You were exhausted, in pain, and flat out sick of everything.

“What?! I’m what Bo? I’m a worthless, good for nothin’ piece o shit? Huh? Just like your FUCKING BROTHER HUH?!?”

“Ya know what, now that you say it-” he smirked.

CRACK The air around you was still, and thick. Bo doubled over, trying to comprehend what happened. You clenched your jaw, refusing to show tears on your face, even as pain blossomed through your joints.

“Not another fucking word out of your goddamn mouth, Bo Sinclair, or so help me god I’m gonna be the one gluing your lips shut! Got it?” your voice quaked low and dangerous, and even Bo knew better than to try and talk back.

“The way you treat Lester is fucking shameful! The ONLY thing you seem to be good at is making people feel like shit, and I would fucking expect an ADULT MAN to have more emotional maturity THAN A FUCKING THREE OLD!!!” you felt your voice go shrill and high, warbling with rage.

“I DON’T GIVE A SHIT THAT YOU PUNCH PEOPLE ‘CAUSE YOUR DADDY DIDN'T LOVE YOU, ‘CAUSE NEWSFLASH, ASSHOLE, LESTER’S DADDY DIDN’T LOVE HIM EITHER, AND NEITHER DID HIS MOMMA!!! A detail you seem to fucking forget even though he’s YOUR FUCKING BROTHER, AND YOU SHOULD BE TREATING HIM WITH MORE RESPECT THAN YOU GIVE TO YOUR FUCKING PICKUP!!!

And you!”

Vincent jumped and almost fell backward when you turned to talk to him. You could see his eyes wide with fear under his waxy mask. Good. You wanted this lesson to fucking stick.

“You have less spine than your fucking wax statues! If you had even an ounce self respect, you’d grow a pair and stop putting up with Bo’s bullshit! Or at the very least, you’d stop cowering in the basement being all sad and tragic and try to be invested in what Lester is trying to say rather than blowing him off with bullshit excuses because you can’t be FUCKED to give shit!!!”

You finally let yourself pause, catching your breath. You heard Vincent shifting his weight on his feet, and felt the eye daggers Bo was stabbing you with. “You three are brothers, so fucking act like it,”

And with that, you grabbed Lester by the hand and led him to Bo’s truck. Neither Bo nor Vincent seemed to make any move to follow you. Opening the driver’s side door, you let Jonesy hop up into the back. Noticing that the keys were still in the ignition, you pulled them out and tossed them to Lester. You slid into the passenger seat and let out a silent sigh. Christ, did your head fucking hurt.

You noticed that Lester seemed a bit anxious, but you could tell that he was happy that someone stood up for him.

You looked over at the twins just in time to see Bo smack Vincent's hand away.

“DOn’t fuckin’ touch me!” he growled.

“Bo, get in the fucking truck,” you hissed.

Vincent scrambled through the driver’s side door into the backseat. You exhaled through your nose, noticing that he chose the seat opposite of where you were sitting. Bo was a little late to the party, but you savored the humiliation of him having to crawl into the backseat of his truck.

Satisfied, you leaned against the headrest of your seat, trying to steady your breaths. The purr of the engine was a welcome distraction from the tense air around you. You must’ve fallen asleep at some point because the last thing you remember was Lester carrying you to bed. He gave you a kiss, whispering a gentle ‘thank you’ before you drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

BONUS:

Bo gritted his teeth and rolled his eyes.

“I cannot believe you are making me do this,” he mumbled.

“Please, Bo! I don’t wanna get yelled at again!” Vincent signed hastily.

Bo raised an eyebrow. “You really are a self absorbed prick, aren’t you?”

Vincent dropped his hands in exasperation before picking them up again. “Fine, It’s the right thing to do, and I’m a jerk just like you, now will you please-”

“Alright, alright,” Bo waved Vincents’ hands down.

He reluctantly got up from the couch and trudged up the stairs, Vincent tugging him along . Bo gently knocked on Lester’s bedroom door. Hearing a muffled ‘yes’, he opened it to see Lester standing near his dresser, putting his gear away. Y/n was fast asleep under the covers.

“She asleep?” He nodded his head towards your shape on the bed.

“Uh, yeah i think so, why?” Lester whispered.

“We need to talk,” Bo stated numbly.

“Oh...Uh, gimme a minuet,” he stuffed his pack in the wardrobe before following Bo and Vincent out into the living room.

Bo stood for a moment, shooting his twin a sour glare. He rubbed his forehead and inhaled sharply.

“I’m sorry,” he groused.

Vincent looked at him expectedly as Lester tilted his head in confusion. Bo let out a long-suffering sigh.

“I’m sorry fer always yellin’ at you and tellin’ you yer a piece a shit, ‘cause ya aren’t. I know that you don’t mean to forget things. The reason why I got so angry tonight was ‘cause I was so damn worried about you, but that’s no excuse. So, I’ll try and uh, ‘manage my emotional outbursts', his words, not mine” Bo nodded at his twin.

“What he’s trying to say is that we both care about you, and we’ve both been letting our emotions dictate how we treat you.” His hands hesitated slightly before continuing. “I...as much as would like to believe, I’m not any better than Bo just because I don’t yell at you. I’m self absorbed, and I need to be more self aware and not let myself get strung up over little things,”

Lester sniffed, wiping the tears that were forming on his eyelids. “You wax-heads, of course I know you guys care about me! Why else would you come looking for me at ‘one in the fucking morning’?” he snickered. “I do appreciate your apologies though...I know you an’ Vinnie ain’t got it easy, god knows you didn’t, I was there, but that was it. Just, there. A bystander. I can’t help but wonder if I had said or done something maybe-”

“Lester,” Bo interrupted. “What happened to me-what happened to us is not your fault, or your responsibility.”

“I figure, but the problem is I’m still a bystander now, here in Ambrose. I don’t ever take charge of anythin’, I just stand there and wait for one of you to tell me to do something. Heh...that’s not really useful, ain’t It? I want-I should be takin’ a more active role in the House of Wax, we all have our part to play, don’t we?” “You’re right, we all need to work together,” Vincent signed.

Bo rolled his eyes and huffed, shaking his head at Vincent.

“OOOKAYY, if this shit gets any sweetter im gonna have a heart attack and die!” Bo stood up to leave. “Goodnight,”

“Oh no, not so fast mister!”

Lester wrapped his arms around Bo and pulled him into a hug. Vincent was quick to hug him from behind, pinning Bo between him and Lester.

“Alrighty, I love you too...ok that’s enough you can let me go

now...guys?....Helloooo?”

“We're not lettin' go 'til you hug back~,” Lester sang out.

Vincent rested his head on Bo’s shoulder in place of making a sarcastic remark. Bo grumbled, throwing his arms around Lester, who in turn, squeezed Bo tighter.

“Hey! A Sinclair Sandwich! Ain’t had one of these in a long time,” Lester giggled.

“Happy now?” Bo muttered.

“Yeah,” he sighed.

Bo relaxed a little, allowing himself to sink into the physical affection. Vincent hummed happily in response, and Lester nuzzled into Bo’s other shoulder. Bo closed his eyes, and for a fleeting moment, believed that he was going to be okay.

-Mod Elith

#house of wax #lester sinclair #vincent sinclair #bo sinclair #lester sinclair x reader #fanfic #fluff #angst #angst with a hopeful ending #slasher #istg if lester doesn't stop being such a h i m b o im gonna have to get down on my knees and propose to him #i SWEAR to you this is not anti bo or vinnie #i love the sinclair brothers equally #I just reallt wanted to put the fear of god in bo #mod elith #i still don't know how to add tags when answering an ask on desktopadjskfhalhf

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kaibutsushidousha · 3 years ago

Text

Cat, Ghost, and Revolution Sunday - Chapter 2: The events from Wednesday (part 7)

[INDEX]

A ghost showed up out of nowhere.

Kei was in bed, with the lights off and his eyes closed, recalling that day's events. Remembering the cat he found, Murase, and a lot more.

While was thinking about the meaning of every piece, he heard someone call his name.

It was a girl's voice. At first, he suspected it was Tomoki's ability. He thought his friend was sending another boisterous message with that annoying ability of his. But he didn't hear Tomoki's voice.

Lacking other options, he opened his eyes. There was a ghost there. A ghost was nonchalantly floating in his unlit room. She was transparent and shaped like Minami Mirai.

(Take a deep breath, Kei. What the heck is going on here? I've never seen a ghost before. I'm honestly at a loss for words. I would scream if I was walking on a silent street, but with this ghost appearing to me so anticlimactically, I can't figure out the exact timing to be surprised.)

What confused him the most was the ghost's behavior. She was scratching her head with a blush and smile.

"Uh, good evening", she said.

(How are you supposed to scare me like that? Oh well, I guess I have to answer.)

"Good evening."

No one spoke for the next few seconds. Kei slowly forced his body to move and sat up.

(Ok, what do I do next? I'm really confused with this ghost I just found.)

"Minami?"

The ghost answered with a nod. This confirmed she was Minami Marai. Much to his chagrin.

Kei's head still wasn't running properly but he forced it to find the right words.

"So?"

One word, two letters. It was the vaguest question possible, but she accurately understood what he was asking.

"I woke up like this. Any idea why?"

"Nope."

(When you think of ghosts, you think of death, but here in Sakurada you don't necessarily need to die to become a ghost. And you probably wouldn't become a ghost from dying anywhere else.)

Kei shook his head.

"I have no idea. Is that an astral projection?"

(Makes sense for an ability like that to exist.)

As far as he knew, Minami didn't have an ability. That meant her ability could potentially awaken at any moment. When an ability awakens varies greatly from person to person. It's rare for it to happen to an adult, but gaining an ability as a high schooler didn't make you all that much of a late bloomer.

"Astral projection? That's a supernatural phenomenon. Awesome."

Minami bounced up and down in excitement. It's strange to say a floating object was bouncing up and down, but there was no other way to describe it.

"Pretty sure that's just an ability."

(Though she'd be right if we're counting every ability in Sakurada as a supernatural phenomenon.)

"My ability?"

"That's the most likely answer. Give me some time to think."

People learn about their own abilities having to try. That said, they don't have any instruction manuals. Just a vague feeling they can do something.

Suppose, for example, that someone had the ability to fly. That person would unconsciously know that they could fly before they tried it for the first time, but they would have no idea how high, how fast, or for how long. They'd continue living their lives without knowing how to take off, until one day they inadvertently start flying. Until they're floating in the air, they can't tell if they really have that ability or if it's just their imagination.

"Have you felt like you could become a ghost", Kei asked.

"I wanted to be one sometimes."

"I see. Anything else you wanted to be?"

"A vampire, a mage, a superhero, anything. I just wanted an ability."

"Any particular favorite among the list?"

"Not really. All options were interesting."

(This could go either way. I'll change the question.)

"What's the first thing you want to do now that you're a ghost?"

"Becoming a rumor, I guess. Like the kuchisake-onna. A rumor that will get kids hyped, hopefully."

"So, are you going to do that now?"

"Hm, I wanna try returning to my human form first."

"You think you can?"

"Nope. I have no idea what's going on. Did you figure anything out?", Minami asked, curious.

Kei answered he didn't. Then he noticed how wrong it was for him to talk to a ghost girl from his bed, so he stood up and turned on the lights.

He sat on his desk's chair. Minami was spinning in the air.

"What are you doing?"

"I can go upside down and my skirt won't turn over. That's convenient."

"Nice."

The people had a duty to report to the Bureau whenever a new ability was discovered. Doing that, the Bureau will follow their manual and deal with any potential problems. Kei decided to report to Tsushima, but before he could do anything, Minami swiftly approached his face.

"Think harder, Asai. What do you think happened to me?"

"Ok. Can you tell what you were doing before you became a ghost?"

"I can't remember. I just woke up like this."

Kei gave off an intrigued sigh. Her losing her memories didn't make much sense under the assumption that her ability was to become a ghost. Abilities have all kinds of restrictions, so this could be that, but there was a real chance that it was an external factor.

"Tell me everything you remember, in order. Do you remember getting out of school?"

"I do. You ditched me."

"So you went to search for the vampire alone?"

"Yeah. I guess I became a ghost because I went to the Ghost Mountain?"

"That could be related, yeah. Did you find the vampire?"

"I can't remember. Everything past me approaching the mountain is a blank."

"What time was it?"

"Not long past 5 PM."

Over 6 hours ago.

"When's your next memory?"

"Not too long ago. About 20 minutes."

"And you already a ghost?"

"Yeah."

Kei traced back his memories. Everything she said about the vampire.

"Years ago, someone collapsed from a vampire attack, was it? Do you know what happened to him?"

(Assuming this person really met a vampire, the same thing could have happened to Minami. If what happened to her is like astral projection, her body should be collapsed somewhere.)

She was speaking slowly as if she was trying to remember things mid-sentence.

"According to the files at the U-Res, he quickly regained consciousness."

"And what next? What happened to the vampire?"

"Oh. That's it. That person was also missing memories. That's why they don't remember the vampire's face."

(That's contradictory. I feel like I'll get sidetracked, but I'll ask just in case.)

"He couldn't remember the face, but remembered he met a vampire?"

"Weird, right? The vampire part is probably made up by the U-Res. Oh, I see, that might have been why the prez didn't care for the search."

(It figures... There's one really positive piece of information in her story. The previous vampire victim regained consciousness. That means Minami should be back in her own body in no time. This conclusion is a little too optimistic to my taste, but looking for pessimistic alternatives won't help here. If anything bad happened to her body, a Reset can solve that.)

But there was also one negative piece of information. Kei changed the subject, as he'd prefer to think about that by himself.

"By the way, why did you come to my house?"

"'cause you're with the Service Club. I thought you'd know how to solve the problem."

"Sorry, but Service Club requests need to go through the Bureau."

"What? Even for classmates? I thought you were nicer than that."

"I'll help on a personal level, of course, but you'd better leave for tonight. It's already late. Your family must be worried."

"Going home as a ghost wouldn't make them any less worried."

"I'll tell Tsushima to tell the Bureau. They don't take long to solve any ability-related problem. Tell your family everything is fine."

Minami frowned, displeased. That was a rare expression for her.

"If my body is collapsed in the mountain, I'm not really too comfortable with just leaving it there."

(Excellent point. I know it's fine because I can simply Reset, but I'm not supposed to tell my classmates about that. Tomoki has been the only exception so far. I absolutely don't want anyone casually asking me to rewind time for any trivial reason.)

Kei proposed a random idea to console her.

"So, do you want me to go check the Ghost Mountain now?"

(I really should have done that from the start. But if there really is an unknown threat on the Ghost Mountain and I make a big mistake... if anything happens to me, Haruki won't be able to Reset. I gotta set up a safety measure.)

Minami frantically waved her arms in front of her face.

"Thanks, but I'd never drag away someone who was trying to sleep. Will you go to the mountain with me in the morning?"

"No problem. That's better for me, too."

"Oh, but you have work for the Service Club tomorrow, right?"

Kei shook his head. That was a lie made to keep the pre-Reset world intact.

"I can do something about that. No need to worry."

"Really?"

"Yeah. How about we met at 9 on the staircase of the Hanamisaki Shrine?"

She agreed.

They said goodbye to each other and Minami left through the closed window. Being a ghost had its benefits.

Kei watched her go away. The rain was already over. There were no stars in the night sky, but the outside was lit by the city lights. Her dim glow made her look like a real ghost. After he could no longer see her, Kei closed the curtains and went to bed.

(Now, the negative information. That's ghost Minami's appearance itself. She didn't come to my apartment before the Reset. She didn't become a ghost. This changed despite my constant efforts to react the same way I did before. What caused this? Where did her future change? Damn it.)

The Reset caused this. She became a ghost because Kei ordered Haruki to Reset. Ghosts are associated with death. Kei couldn't stop himself from thinking about the girl who died two years before.

(Let's do what I can first. I have to tell Tsushima. He'll need to tell the Bureau, so I'll text him. Less information is lost in the telephone game when it's written.)

After sending his message, Kei opened his phone's contact list. He wanted to prepare insurance for the case of an unforeseen tragedy. He selected a saved number and hit Call.

The dialing sound soon stopped and he heard a cheerful voice. Nakano Tomoki. After he was done with the long-winded greeting, Kei spoke.

"I got a favor to ask if you don't mind."

#sagrada reset #cat ghost and revolution sunday #asai kei #minami mirai #nakano tomoki

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spector · 4 years ago

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i never understood why din took his helmet off twice! i actually really liked when he took it off in the imperial base-- i thought it did show some character development in how far he would go, what he would sacrifice to save grogu-- but taking it off again to say goodbye was just outright silly. and all the imperials in the place getting blown to bits minutes later kind of negated the emotional weight of him taking it off but maybe that's just me

i still didnt like the morak bit but youre right, there was a specific reason why din took it off, to do something to help his baby but at the same time, if u start to look at the specifics of the scene, then its just fucking silly

first of all, the imperial computer only needed to see A FACE. not a face of a stormtrooper, just a FACE. which is strange in itself, but ok, whatever, i’ll let it pass bc maybe it was taking pictures of everyone who accessed the database for later use. but like, if you are concerned about who uses the database then why not implement some sort of facial recognition gihfihgifhg what the hell

and then the reason why mayfeld cant do it is bc he's concerned that some imperial officer is gonna recognize him. ok then what all din needed to do is sit down next to that officer and try to talk to him and distract him long enough for mayfeld to do his stuff by the computer. i know its not the most EXCITING scene but the way they forced din to take off his helmet is just soooo forced and contrived?? mayfeld literally went ‘ooohh ooof there's some guy who MIGHT recognize me I'm scared you have to go access the face computer bc i cant owww’

another issue i have with morak is that. they picked.

they picked MAYFELD to be the one to challenge the entire Mandalorian culture. like who the fuck is mayfeld. he's nobody he wasn't even in the previous episodes and suddenly he's the mouthpiece of an Opinion?? and I'm not going to say that he's wrong bc in the essence he was criticizing that stiff rules are bad rules and that's a point i can agree with and i think even din agrees with. the point mayfeld was making was that sooner or later, there comes a moment when you have to bend the rules a little bit and if your rules don't allow for that then they're not good. and that's a fair observation (better than “YOURE IN A CULT”). however, the fact that its MAYFELD OF ALL PEOPLE delivering that point is just. downright silly, like who is that baldo. who is that. he doesn't mean anything to din, din has NOOOOOOOOOOOOO REASOOOOOOOON to even listen to anything he has to say.

the really tragic thing is that because of the way they wrote mando s2, there is NO character that could have convincingly deliver that message to din. during s2, din made barely any emotional connections which is sooo funny bc this season is OVERLOADED with characters but din never has a meaningful conversation with any of them. the most meaningful connection he had in season 2 was that moment with the frog lady as she pleaded for the future of her kind and he related to it bc mandos are almost extinct too. and cobb i guess tho it was more. din monologuing at him and teaching him to be normal so it was a little bit one-sided

but from ep 3 forward... there's just nothing. they never let din have a moment with anyone, there are no connections. compare it to s1 where we saw din’s relationships with c*ra, greef and kuill evolve overtime. now they just throw people at him and expect us to care bc most of those characters come from other pieces of sw media and i know its very hypocritical of me to say this bc i love boba-- actually i have to stop i might be here for the rest of the night DFGHIDFHG I HOPE I COMMENTED ON UR ASK AT LEAST A LITTLE BIT

#screammm #Anonymous

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sunsetsover · 5 years ago

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give us a rundown of ur thoughts about tonight's ep it's what we deserve

this is cute bc my rambly ass thoughts very rarely make sense and are just me screaming into the void generally but if u want it who am i to deny u!!!! also im sorry i know i promised u this yesterday but i had Stuff going on but anyways we’re here now!!!!

ok firstable let me direct u towards this post bc i have not stopped thinking abt it for the past few days and i cba to type it all out again but... Yeah

and actually i think i have MORE to add bc i just cannot get over how young ben looked throughout the whole scene like!!! and not even just his face (even tho his face looked so young too) but his body language!!! sittin there on his knees with his hands between his thighs looking so emotional and YOUNG and vulnerable like its fuckin me up sm

esp the way ben looked at callum’s hand when he signed ‘ok’ i think it was a moment of clarity for ben like he’s finally realized that callum is committed he’s in it for the long haul he’s willing to adapt and has already started!!! i feel like in a way it was a call back to when ben asked callum to prove that he really did love ben and that was ben realizing that callum HAS been proving it this whole time

and there’s smth to be said abt the fact that he could only allow himself to BE that overtly vulnerable BECAUSE callum had his eyes closed. like you can see the moment callum opens his eyes and looks at him ben catches himself and tries to put his walls back up and move on like none of it ever happened !! bc he’s scared of vulnerability!!! in his life vulnerability has always meant pain!!! but he’s trying!!!! he’s getting there!!! slowly but surely!!!

and the fact that callum knew exactly what ben was doing and why he was doing it and didn’t let him!!! not in a forceful way it was just like look at me!!! it’s fine!!! you’re safe!!! i love you too!!!! which only overwhelmed ben MORE to the point where he didn’t know what to do but kiss callum like god!!!!!!!!! god

callum telling him he loved him in sign!!!! the fact that that means callum has been sitting there in his flat googling ‘how to say i love you in sign’ and watching youtube tutorials and practising his signs wow rip

and everything callum said to even get to that point !!!!!! literally every word out of his mouth !!!! the fact that he apologised and said he didn’t mean to make ben feel bad was so important!!! the fact that he told ben how strong he is!!! and how amazing he is!!! and how amazing it is that he’s handling everything going on atm!!!! and telling ben that phil isn’t anywhere NEAR as strong as ben is and that if he doesn’t want anything to do with ben then that’s HIS problem not ben’s like that’s all i’ve ever wanted ANYONE to tell ben !!! i’ve wanted ben to hear that for so long!!!! and the fact that it was callum telling him those things and in such a beautiful vulnerable moment and the fact that callum assures him that even if he doesn’t have his dad at his side callum is there!!!! and he will continue to be there!!! just fuck off im crying and im never going to stop

i know i said it in my other post but the fact that ben bought so many presents for callum’s birthday and got up in the middle of the night to wrap them and they’re all in different paper........... like once they get more in tune with each other’s love languages it’s over for us bitches

the fact!!!!!!! that ben telling callum he loves him!!!!!! put tears in callum’s eyes!!!!!! it made him want to cry!!!!! bc he knows!!!!! he knows it’s not an easy thing for ben and he knows ben means it and just!!!!!!!!! that has fucked me up sm u don’t even know

and just the absolute poetry in the fact that in that moment callum can’t see and ben can’t hear like they’re restricted and yet they’re communicating anyway and vikki summed it up way better than i ever could but there’s just this undercurrent of just like.... seeing and hearing each other properly and being honest even tho they CAN’T see/hear each other and whew it’s a lot

the way you can hear ben’s breath shaking as he kisses callum like he’s so overwhelmed!!!!!!!! my baby!!!!!!!!

literally i’m never ever going to be over the vulnerability and the love and the honesty in that moment

and the second scene!!! the way they were just laying there looking at each other!!!!!!!!!!! they were just laying in bed and staring at each other until the early hours in the morning like can u imagine being that in love w someone that u just wanna lay there and look at them?? wish i could relate

ben apologising to callum!!!!!!! was so important!!!!!! acknowledging that he’s been a prat !!!!! but then explaining it’s bc he doesn’t really know how to be vulnerable like can u believe it was just 2 scenes but we got so much #blessed

(also callum telling ben he hasn’t been a prat which he HAS but it was callum’s way of saying ‘i know, i get it, i understand, i forgive you’ all rolled into one bye)

the way ben stroked callum’s hair and face as he apologised....... the way callum literally just reached out and touched ben’s cheek bc he needed to touch him....... and the way ben leaned up into callum’s hand....... yeah.gif

callum firmly telling ben needs to learn sign language!!!! he get’s it and he forgives ben, BUT changes have to be made and one of those is ben learning sign language!!! and yeah ben goes to make a (probably rude) sign w his hands (and the way callum instantly reacts tells me that whatever he was gonna do, it wasn’t the first time lmao) but he doesn’t argue or resist he just accepts it which!!!! growth!!!

ben looking at callum like this goodbye

callum’s thoughtful gift!!!! a watch that vibrates!!!!!! best boyfriend in the world award goes to callum highway

the fact that ben was like WELL SEEING AS THO WE’RE GIVING GIFTS and let callum open one of his 15 presents :-(

‘officer highway breaking all the rules ay?’ does he ever stop

it’s just the way the whole bed scene was just so soft and intimate but still THEM u know w the banter and the teasing like it didnt feel ooc it just felt like them :-(

and last but by no means least: ben saying ‘we’ll make a mitchell of you yet’ and the way callum just smiled and looked at ben???? like he can’t quite believe it??? which mood bc i can’t either??? i’m literally gonna be in my grave thinking about it like i don’t know how im ever supposed to move on

ben is going to make a mitchell of callum one day they’re going to get married thank you and goodnight

#ballum #eastenders #im dead serious i've not stopped thinking abt callum mitchell since the ep aired #anon #question

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channoticedmeuwu · 3 years ago

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So, idk if this is still ok but i saw your post about "if anyone anon or not needs a space to vent they can"

I just need to get a few things off my chest and idk who else to tell so im telling a stranger. Sorry for that bestie.

Trigger Warning: Suicidal thoughts, SH

You don't gotta keep reading if those make you uncomfortable i just gotta let it out bc i feel like I'll explode if i don't

So, idk if you know the whole "intentionally going numb/ turning off emotions" thing but i basically did that a month or so ago. And now i don't wanna go back to feeling bc i know i will just break down bc everything is too much and the fact that i don't have any real problems just makes everything worse. Like i know i don't have the fucking right to want to k word myself bc i don't have it nearly as bad as other people but that doesn't make me suddenly wanna live?

I have great friends, mostly supportive parents (although their parenting is questionable) im white, live in a wealthy country am abled and never faced "hard" discrimination based on my sexual orientation.

However, everything just seems pointless?

I had ⅓ graduation exams today and the next one which is math is tomorrow and i just straight up did not study bc i didn't see the point. My dad bought me an expensive car although i don't have a driver's license yet (i guess as motivation). And idk why anything would matter. Im turning 18 in a few days and the only good thing im seeing is that im gonna be able to buy my own alcohol.

Earlier i came to the conclusion that tomorrow would be a great day to k word myself and usually i just brush that stuff off but rn it genuinely seems like a pretty good solution. I only haven't done it yet bc i think about my friends and how traumatized they'd be but i was such an asshole today. Im pretty sure one of them (ironically my favorite one) hates me by now bc of all the emotional damage ive caused. They didn't even bother adding anything to the bs i said.

Funnily enough another friend told me i was obsessed with them^ bc i had/have a longass unrequited crush and ngl now that she said it i get what she meant. I am obsessed. Im a piece of shit lol. For constantly treating the people around me like toys. "meh they'll still be here when i play with the other one" no they fucking won't dumbass. I try my best to remind them that i care but the last few times it just sounded so wrong. Like i was forcing them to stay my friends. Like they would leave in a heartbeat if i didn't constantly manipulate them. Funfact my brain is like "you're saying bs rn" which is weird considering it usually likes it when i minimize my problems and make it sound like im being an asshole to everyone even though i just have a bad day.

Idk man. I told my therapist i think i might have adhd and he was like "i don't think you do" Granted he probs thinks im a teenager who's overreacting. Like the last one lol. That lady was smth else lmao. Telling me everything i felt was normal. Uh ma'am sorry but i don't think constantly blaming yourself for everything that literally doesn't have anything to do with you and having a voice in your head that tells you to kword yourself 24/7 is not normal but go off karen.

Anyway a friend messaged the gc earlier asking what we wanna do tmrw night and my first thought was "idk bout u but i hope im dead by then"

My mom's not home anyway so she won't "save me".

Just gotta figure out how and where and write a bunch of letters.

Bc the least i can do is give people a last goodbye. Yk bc i think as bad as it is, if im leaving i could at least give them smth to remember me by. A few words saying im grateful and i know they did their best but they couldn't have stopped me.

Maybe adding some hearts so they remember me as that bubbly caring friend i always tried to be.

Sorry for putting this on you stranger. I just didn't want to tell someone else.

If you've read this far thank you.

I'll try my best to stay alive. Maybe things will get better eventually.

Sorry again.

hey there buddy :'] I just wanna say a few things in response too! I hope I don't step over any personal boundaries, but I'm really worried and I can't bear to see this and not say anything. So under the cut, is just a few words I wanted to say :]

You don't have to read at all if you don't want to <3

[tw : mentions of suicide, bad mental state, negativity ]

I'm really glad you came to me and saw that post. I'm so happy you did, and tbfh I'm really proud of you for doing so. I would never have the guts to do it, and I think you're really brave for it.

I see that you're struggling a lot, and although it might sound strange coming out of a stranger, I really do appreciate you here. I know I can't do much rather than just offer presence on a website, but I really believe in you.

It's sad to know that people have to go through alot recently. I'm sorry you were faced with that. It must be very tough, and I really just want to give you a big hug </3

another thing I wanted to add : I am a person of color, and I just want to say that just because the world and alot of pocs are facing serious issues that people deem as "something to actually be depressed about", you should never compare your personal issues to that. Yes, sure, the world is suffering, yes, sure, everyone is facing problems, and yes, of course, some problems may hurt more than others do. That does not mean yours are invalid. I don't believe anyone needs a "reason" to be depressed. It's not a voluntary action, you can't control those feelings. Please, trust me, do not feel bad. Someone, a very close friend of mine, told me this while we were alone together. I'm glad she did, because it made me feel better at that time. And I'm passing on the message because it's true. No matter your sexuality, your race, your financial status, your gender identity; your issues at valid. Your problems are valid. You have every right to be upset, and you shouldn't invalidate yourself like that.

I'm sorry that you have to go through so much to go to be willing to do the k-thing. Al though I can't say much, I would love for you to stay. You would always have a welcoming place in my blog, and you'd always be appreciated here. I'm so sorry for everything happening, and I'm so sorry for not being able to do anything more. I don't know if you want to hear this, but I love you. I love you alot, very much, and it hurts me too, to see you like this.

Please, if you ever want to stay, if you ever want to chat, if you ever need a leaning shoulder or a listening ear, please, reach out to me. My dms are always open, my inbox is always open. If I don't reply, it's because I'm asleep.

Again, I'm glad you were brave enough to share this, and I'm glad that you're still here. I really appreciate you, my inbox and dms are ALWAYS open, please, drop by and say something whenever you feel like it.

Thanks for this message anon, I love you <3

My heart reaches out to you. I'll always be here. I meant what I said.

#ask kai #anon :DD #tw : suicide #tw : negativity

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ijustwant2write · 5 years ago

Text

Language of Love-Steve Rogers x Reader

(GIF credit to @tessatompsons)

Masterlist

Requested by anonymous

Summary: ‘Can u write on where Steve is jealous because the reader knows Italian and spends a lot of time hanging out with Tony and tony, to be a little shit, keeps saying they have a special connection? Thank you! I love writing!!’

Characters: Steve Rogers x Reader, Tony Stark x Reader (platonic), Natasha Romanoff x Reader (platonic)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: slight arguing, jealousy, fluff

(A/N: I don’t speak Italian and I didn’t want to risk using a translator in case it was incorrect, but I still stuck to the request)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Steve let out a deep breath as he entered the compound, his boots making his steps even heavier. He couldn’t believe how tired he was. There had been so many small but exhausting missions, and even though they definitely weren’t difficult, it was one after the other, and the debriefing felt like it took longer than the mission itself.

Evening was beginning, the sun was setting and creating an orange and peach glow across the landscape. But Steve didn’t have time to admire his surroundings. He headed towards the kitchen, needing to grab lots of coffee before writing up about the mission. As he entered the room, his stress numbed for a moment, seeing his beautiful girlfriend preparing her own food. She realised he was here, instantly grinning as she scurried to him. They embraced, Steve refraining from collapsing onto her.

“That was another quick mission.” (Y/N) commented as they pulled away, briefly kissing.

“Again.” Steve groaned.

“Hey, don’t complain. It’s better than some of the ones we’ve been on before.”

Tony entered the room, mumbling something under his breath with a smirk. Steve wasn’t sure if he had misheard him or was too tired to function properly, because he had no idea what his friend had said. But when (Y/N) giggled, he knew nothing was wrong with him. But before he could even ask, (Y/N) spoke up, speaking a different language.

“Wait, you speak...what was it, Italian?” Steve asked in disbelief.

“Yeah.” (Y/N) shrugged.“Just something I picked up.”

“Tony, you speak Italian?”

Tony nodded, grabbing a mug for himself.

“I didn’t know that.”

“Well, you learn something new everyday Rogers.”

(Y/N) spoke Italian again, her and Tony sniggering as she finished her sentence. Steve couldn’t help but feel a little left out; though he shook it off, slinging his arm around his girlfriend as they walked out of the room. He knew he couldn’t put off those papers anymore, but if he didn’t have a bit of familiarity before then, he would surely go mad.

“What other languages do you speak?” Steve spoke up as they walked down the hall.

“Hm,” she thought about it,“French and Spanish, a little bit of German. Currently working on Russian but that’s a hard one.”

“How come I never knew this?”

“I guess I never mentioned it. Thought I would have, seeing how impressive it is.”

He chuckled.“Yeah, it definitely is.”

Within the next few days, Steve realised just how much (Y/N) and Tony were taking advantage of their connection with speaking Italian. How had he not known this before? How had he never even asked about the languages she spoke? Wouldn’t she have brought it up? Anyone else would look at Steve and wonder why he was making such a big deal about this, it was just a language, many people spoke Italian, Nat and Clint did. But there was just something about (Y/N) and Tony sharing that, that made Steve...no he wasn’t jealous, that wasn’t the right word. Jealousy was an ugly thing, he had always thought so.

However, over the coming days, Steve was beginning to realize that this feeling he had was in fact that ugly thing. It wasn’t as if he thought they were having an affair, of course not! Steve and (Y/N) were extremely happy, and so were Tony and Pepper; he could never see either cheating. Though it began to frustrate him as he carried on trying to come up with a theory, a reason that would explain this rage inside him, the thing that made him snap and bark orders at anyone who crossed his path.

“Steve?” Nat snapped her fingers at him across the table, startling him out of deep thought.

“Sorry.” he mumbled, barely looking at her.

“Did that piece of paper offend you or something?”

“What?”

She pointed her finger at his hands, which were in tight, shaking fists, crumbling up the said paper. He let go, watching as it stayed scrunched up, shocked by how invested he had been in his mind.

“What’s going on? You OK?”

He sighed as he spoke.“Yeah. Too much work.”

“Well you have been taking on every mission that has come our way.”

“It’s cause I’ve been requested to go on them, I have to.”

“You could have said no to a couple of them. You need rest too.”

“That’s exactly what I said.” (Y/N) announced her presence as she walked in, placing her hands on his shoulders as she kissed his head.

Steve kept his eyes on the paper.“S.H.I.E.L.D wouldn’t allow it. I don’t have a good enough reason.”

“(Y/N)’s a perfectly good excuse.” Nat joked, though Steve didn’t catch on.

“Are you crazy? Could you imagine what their response would be?”

“Steve, Nat was just joking-”

“I’ve got work to get on with.”

He stood up, messily piling up the papers and storming off. (Y/N) and Nat could tell how stressed he was, but he didn’t have to take it out on them. (Y/N) huffed, mumbling a goodbye to Natasha before she too rushed out of the room, though headed in the opposite direction to Steve. Nat suddenly worried for her friends, seeing that neither had spent any time with each other, let alone have a short conversation. Though she knew better than to get involved, and thought it best to observe...maybe wait for the right time to help.

Steve found himself unable to concentrate on his filing now, angry at himself for dismissing his girlfriend. Finally giving up, he left the papers behind, setting out to find (Y/N) and apologize. He had gone over what he was going to say, trying to release any built up tension as to not lash out at her. But just as he was at peace, knew exactly what to say to her, it all disappeared as he spotted (Y/N) and Tony together, her leaning on a desk in his lab as he stood there and worked on a piece of his suit. No, not this again.

Their heads turned to see Steve enter, (Y/N) rolling her eyes as she saw his frown, Tony trying to differ what was going on. Steve ignored Tony, walking up to stand beside (Y/N).

“I need to talk to you.” it was more of a demand than a request.

(Y/N) slowly looked to Tony, speaking Italian to him, Steve trying to figure out what she said from his facial expressions.

“(Y/N), I really want no part of this-”

She interrupted, sounding angrier than before.

“Uh, she wants me to tell you that you really upset her earlier.”

“(Y/N), I’m here to apologize.”

She spoke again.

“She doesn’t know what’s gotten into you, uh...feels like you’re ignoring her and, woah, slow down! Yeah basically you’re being a jerk for no reason.”

“For no reason? I have a reason!”

“Then what is it?!” (Y/N) returned to speaking English, eyes wide and furious.

He hesitated.“I’d rather not say in front of Tony.”

Tony started to back away.“That’s fine, I’ll stay away-”

“No, Tony stay. I actually have a feeling you’re a part of this.”

Steve’s nostrils flared, but he knew he had to say this now.“It’s extremely childish and stupid, but I am jealous of what you and Tony share.”

“The fact that we both speak Italian?”

“Yeah, I guess it was something you two had in common that we didn’t, and...” as Steve continued talking, he realised the true reason he was jealous,“and the fact that you two were spending more and more time together made it worse. But it’s entirely my fault, I’ve been accepting all these missions and cleaning up everyone else’s messes, when I should have taken a break not just for me but for us.”

“OK, now I really feel like I should leave.” Tony walked away, though the couple hardly noticed.

“Steve, you really don’t have any reason to be jealous.”

“I just didn’t want you thinking that I’m purposefully ignoring you.”

“I know you aren’t! You’re Captain America, unfortunately you’re expected to do these things.”

Steve inched closer, holding one of her hands.“But there are other heroes that can do the job just as good. I’m not going to accept any other missions for a while, claim I need a break.”

“No, Steve, what if they-”

“I don’t care what they say or do. They can’t force me out there.”

“Thank you Steve.” they gently kissed, forgetting that Tony was eve there until he cleared his throat.

“So, you’re still OK with us having this ‘special connection’? Just checking as to not get on your bad side....jealous side.”

Steve rolled his eyes, though in a playful way.”As long as it remains speaking Italian, it’s fine with me.”

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gcldveins · 5 years ago

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HELLOOOOOO everyone !!!!!!!! i just wanna say .. thank you SO MUCH for joining misty hollow with jin and i , you have no idea how happy it made us to see so many people interested and join and like .. just clearly so in love w their own muses so like i just wanna say i love u all with my whole freaking heart !!!! ok enough w the sappy stuff let me introduce to u all literally the worst muse i have ever created .. malcolm o’sullivan. but he goes by sully bc he was ur og e-boy who goes “ oh ? my favourite band ? you wouldn’t have heard of it .. they’re called the rolling stones uwu ” and i rlly do hate him for that... it’s okay tho i punish him accordingly :~)

overview

✎⌠paul rudd. cismale. he/him⌡❝ — well, look who’s just arrived ! if it isn’t the one and only malcolm o'sullivan. though, around here they’re known as the harlequin. don’t tell ‘em i said this but the forty-seven year old owner of o'sullivan’s books kinda has a reputation of being stubborn and irresponsible. but y’know, they can be creative and analytical too. typical aquarius. anyways, welcome home and stay safe sully ! ❞

statistics

full name: malcolm eamon o’sullivan

nickname(s): sully, anything else and he twitches ..

date of birth: february 2nd, 1973

hometown: misty hollow, connecticut.

gender identity: cis gender

preferred pronouns: he/him

sexual orientation: bisexual

hogwarts house: ravenclaw

aesthetic: an old leather jacket thrown over a wrinkled t-shirt, dog-eared pages, the smell of alcohol and cigarettes, untied laces, the soft rumbling of a motorcycle engine, messy handwriting, calloused fingertips

distinguishable characteristics: is looking homeless a distinguishable characteristic..

pinterest board: here.

their song from the sigh no more album bc i love this album and it makes me Sad™ : little lion man

background ( murder tw )

— born in the town of dingle, a small port town in ireland, malcolm and his family immigrated to america when he was ten years old. they moved into misty hollow after his father opened up his own bookshop and the o’sullivan’s have been there ever since.

— always having been a rebellious child, malcolm ( slowly gaining the nickname sully in school ) seemed to have a knack for doing anything that pissed his father off. his greatest act ? moving out as soon as he graduated without so much as a goodbye.

— malcolm was only a wee lad when the misty hollow murders were happening. his older brother, his only brother, was unfortunately one of the victims, being eight at the time. he’s not too torn up about it, he was only two years old. but his father reminded him everyday growing up, how much smarter and accomplished and just overall better his brother was than him.

— the only thing that sully was grateful for about his father was the love for books he had ingrained into him. growing up, he developed a knack for writing and he ended up going to the university of pennsylvania for journalism. after that, sully moved out to new york where he worked as a journalist for the new york times and wrote articles on political updates and reports.

— he met his wife in new york and they had three children together, two girls and one boy. sully was living the classic american dream. until, of course, it was all ruined in a single camping trip.

— it was just sully and the three kids, except the trip was cut short and he had to come home with two kids instead of three. sully’s youngest, nancy, was taken at the campgrounds and evidence of her murder was found in a nearby cabin.

— this tore sully’s family apart. the tragedy forced him towards a downwards spiral, an endless cycle of destructive habits. it got to the point where his wife decided to divorce him and to take the kids with her.

— sully eventually, reluctantly, made the decision to return to misty hollow. there, he stayed with his parents for a bit until he got a job at o’sullivan’s books and was able to take a couple months to get back on his feet.

— his parents initially pushed him towards trying to work at the mystic herald but sully hasn’t written a single sentence since his daughter died. now, his father has essentially left him to run the bookshop for him, which sully doesn’t mind. it’s quiet work that doesn’t require too much effort.

personality

— to sum it up in one sentence .. sully has essentially has regressed into a man-child in the more recent years of his life, but the inferiority complex is a tried and true constant.

— he hasn’t really properly dealt with his daughter’s death ( even though it’s been over a decade.. ), just lives in a constant cycle of whenever he does try to think about it, he feels like shit and just thinks about all the things he could’ve done differently so he stops immediately.

— sully always wanted to be a dad, to prove that he could be a better one than his own father. so he feels like he really failed in that retrospect. he’s like a human pity party. though he does that classic thing where he glosses over his sad feelings with destructive behaviour and inappropriate humour.

— very self-indulgent, does whatever he wants, whenever he wants. as long as it makes him feel better, even just for a moment, he’ll do it. doesn’t take anything very seriously, just kinda jokes around all the time. is one of those people that just give off.. kinda pathetic vibes you know? like you look at him and you’re like ?? what are you doing with your life dude ?? and he’s like idk

— but, on the bright side, this makes him pretty easy-going and down-to-earth. definitely a roll-with-the-punches and no bullshit type of guy, isn’t discouraged by much and doesn’t care a whole lot about what others think of him. it’s easy for him to engage in conversation and be all charismatic when he feels like it.

— despite all .. of that, sully actually comes across as a relatively okay guy. he can be friendly and crack a few jokes while he’s at it, he’s one of those people that, as long as thinks you’re chill, treats you like you guys have been friends forever. but he can be pretty crude / vulgar at times, sooo how others react to that is kind of a gamble !

wanted connections

his one true bro <3 just someone that’ll be a complete idiot with him and they are definitely a bad influence on each other. this person probably hangs around the bookshop alot and they just spend all day with each other doing and saying stupid shit. like you know that gif set of seth rogen and joseph gordon-levitt where one’s like “ i’d fuck you ” and the other goes “ thanks :3 ” that’s it.. those are the vibes..

drinking buddies ! these two just get really drunk off their ass together and probably don’t even know each other that well despite of like.. several years of sort of friendship. one night they’re probably five drinks in and sully goes “ when i was married — ” and they’re just like “ wayment .. what the fuck . ” and ! maybe if your muse has something to get emo about ! maybe they can get drunk AND emo together <3

casual relationships ? he could have one or two of these ! sully.. does not date. tried being in a serious relationship once after his divorce and it ended... terribly. like imagine asking your adult boyfriend if he wants to move in together and his response is essentially just “ ... yeah i’m ok thanks tho. ” and you never hear from him again ndijgnk

that being said... if anyone wants that plot alluded to above .... let me know......

for the younger muses out there ! anyone that he’s kind of ? taken under his wing. pseudo-children essentially. i can’t promise that he’ll be a good influence.. he’s probably not even aware that he’s done this lmao but deep down, sully’s still a dad. he’ll probably be protective over the youngins but shows it in the form of tough love, y’know ? probably tells your muse to stop being a shithead all the time, cute stuff like that.

and some more casual connection ideas that we can further flesh out through some plotting / brainstorming:

old friends from misty hollow

regular customers

co-workers

an unrequited crush ( either on sully’s end or your muse’s )

a good influence on him .. please... i’m begging you

someone that can nerd out over books with him !

friends !!! everyone needs friends and lucky for sully, he’s pretty good at making them !! in a pushy and annoying way..

enemies / frenemies pls ... these are always so much fun

anything and everything else !! if we can’t figure out a plot between sully and your muse, we can always just do it old school and throw them at each other in a random thread and see what happens !!

#misty.intro #this is a whole ass novel im sorry nfidjmfsdl

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millicent231-watt · 6 years ago

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(AoT) Stay With Me - Levi X Reader

Anime / Crossover: Attack on Titan

Songs: No

Request: No

Modern AU: No

NSFW/R-18: No

------------------------------------------------------------------

May be slightly triggering for some people. Includes mentions of sexual assault and forced sexual actions. No descriptions, but mentions of it.

------------------------------------------------------------------

I, Y/N, lay on my bed, shaking and facing the wall as Heichou buttoned up his shirt. Why me? I think to myself as I heard him walking out the door. He said it was an order but... Yes, I was being forced to perform sexual acts to and with my superior, by my superior. And no, I don't hate him, I actually really like him, but when he acts the way he does during these times, demanding and possessive...it scares me, a lot. So much so that I've begun having nightmares of it. "Y/N!" My best friend, Hange yells as she bursts through the door. "Oh no...He did it again, didn't he?" She asks softly as her footsteps approach me. I turn around to face her and nod before crying and burying my face into the sheets. She sighs and kneels in front of the bed, pushing my tangled and knotty hair out of my face. "Are you sure you don't want me to talk to him?" She asks and I shake my head quickly. "If you tell him, he'll kill me! I wasn't supposed to tell anyone...not that I did." I end with a whisper. "Y/N, I found out on my own, so it's not like you disobeyed him." She says and I shake my head. "You just...you can't." I beg. "Alright. I'll leave you on your own for a bit, I've got some work to do." I nod before she walks out of the room. I sigh and pull the covers over my head. "I need to do it soon."

Hange's POV

I walk towards Levi's room with rage-filled eyes and a mouth ready to spout any insults I could think of. I'm sorry Y/N, but I've gotta tell him to stop doing this to you. I kick the door in and walk over to his desk. "You better be ready to replace that, four-eyes." He says as his eyes skin over the paperwork. I slam my hands onto his desk and he looks up at me, unimpressed. "What?" He growls as he places his paperwork down. "What are you playing at Levi?" I ask and he cocks an eyebrow. "What the fuck are you talking about? Did all your experiments affect your brain or something?" He says with a scowl before I grab his shirt and cravat, pulling him forward. "I'm talking about Y/N!" I yell at him and he grabs my hand. "I don't know what you're talking about." He says as he puts an increasing amount of pressure on my wrist. "S...stop that!" I wince as he begins twisting my hand back on itself. "Get the hell out of my office." He says, pushing me away harshly. I grab my wrist in pain and look up at him. "She's gonna leave, you know." I say and he flinches. "She can't leave without my permission. I'm her superior." He says and I open the door. "That might be true, but if she gets the go-ahead from Erwin and he sends her to another division, your opinion doesn't matter." I say before turning on my heel and leaving to the infirmary.

Your POV

I take a deep breathe and bring my fist up to knock on the Commander's door. "CADET Y/N!" I hear someone yell and I quickly salute. "Y...yes, Heichou?" I ask as I try to remain calm. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" He asks and my salute falls. She told him... "N...nothing, Sir. I was just-" "I don't care what you're doing, you're coming with me." He says before he grabs my arm. "I....I'm sorry, Sir, b...but I have to drop off something to the Commander." I say as I try to pull myself from his grip. "Levi, let her go." I hear the Commanders voice demand and I quickly try to pull my arm away. "Tch, why? I've got a job for her." Captain Levi says as he tightens his grip. I wince and whine in pain as I try to pull away. "Are you really so stubborn that you'd hurt one of your own cadets, just to get your own way?" Commander says and Captain's grip softens greatly before he lets go and walks off. "Now, what did you want me for?" Commander asks with a warm smile. "I...uh...I want you to sign something..." I say and he lets me into his office.

"Come, sit." He says and I sit in the chair across from his desk. He holds his hand out for the paper and I hesitate for a second before handing it to him. "A resignation form?" He asks. "Uh...kinda. I don't wanna resign from the military, I just..." I sigh and hang my head. "Do you wanna move to another branch in the military, or do you just wanna switch squads?" He asks, causing me to quickly look up in shock. "How did you-" "Hange told me this might happen, she never mentioned why this would happen though. Do you mind telling me?" I twiddle my thumbs and look down. "With all due respect Sir, no." I say and he shrugs before grabbing his ink pen and dipping it in the ink. "Are you sure about this?" He asks and I think for a bit. "To be honest, I don't want to....like, at all, but I know if I stay here any longer I'm sure to become less attentive." I say and he nods. "Alright." He says and signs his signature on the dotted line. "Done. Go get your things packed, say goodbye to everyone, because you will be changing squads tomorrow." I nod and stand up. "Thank you, Sir." I say with a salute and walk out.

I walk back to my room and begin packing my things. "So, I'm assuming he signed it then." I hear my friend say and I look back to the door. "Yeah..." I say before turning back and continuing packing. "So...where're you going?" She asks nervously. I stand up and face her. "Why'd you tell him?" I ask and she jumps a little. "W...what do you mean?" She asks and I hold back any teas I had. "Why did you tell Corporal? He probably hates me now!" I yell at her. "Y/N...I was just-" "You know what? No, just get out. I don't wanna talk to you." I say as I turn around and zip my suitcase up. I hear her sigh and leave the room. I sigh and sit down on my case. "What am I even doing anymore?" I ask as I rub my temples.

The Next Day

I fix up my horse and get her saddled up. "Y/N, what are you doing?" I hear Heichou say. "Getting my horse ready." I say blandly. "I can see that, dipshit. What are you getting it ready for?" He asks and I turn to face him. I grab the paperwork from my pocket and hand it to him." I'm leaving your squad." I say before jumping up onto my horse, leaving my luggage for the relocation. "You can't do that without my permission!" He says angrily as he grabs my wrist again. "I don't need your permission if I have the Commanders." I snap, tugging my hand away from him and patting my horse. "Is that anyway to treat your superior, you shit?" He barks and I glare at him. "Is the way you treat me anyway to treat a cadet?" I snap back and he stumbles on his words for a bit. "I'm not putting up with you doing that to me anymore 'Captain'. I'm done." I say before riding off.

Levi's POV

I drop the resignation paper she gave ne and watch her figure slowly dissapear into the fog. "I warned you Levi." Hange says as she walks up next to me. "I didn't treat her badly. Did I?" I ask. "In her eyes you raped her, so yes, in some cases you did, but not from your point of view. You loved her didn't you?" She asks as I pick up the papers. I scoff at her comment and begin walking off. "You just didn't know how to convey your feelings to her. Why are you walking away?" She asks and I jump on my horse. "I'm not, I'm going after her."

Stay with me Y/N...I need you...

Your POV

I sniff and wipe my nose, grabbing my gloves and scarf that I brought on my horse. "It's a good thing I brought these." I say to myself as I walk down the hallways of my new housing that belonged to the Military Police. I sigh as I remember all my friends back on my old squad. "CADET Y/N!" I hear my superior yell and I salute. "Yes, Sir!" I say confidently. "Stop spacing out and get to your lecture." He orders and I nod, making my way towards the lecture. This lecture might take my mind off of him.

1 Hour Later

Ok, scratch that. It only made me think of him more. Stupid Hange, learning new thing about Titans, making everyone take a lecture on Titans. I started thinking of her, then him! I scowl as I sat on my bed. "Stop scowling Y/N. You scowl more than Annie." Hitch says with a giggle. "When's my stuff gonna get here? At this rate, it'll be quicker just to go and get it myself." I say and she laughs. "Well then, why don't you?" I flinch and look away. "I can't..." I mumble before hearing her walking away. I sigh and swing my legs back and forth. "Y/N, Commander Nile is calling for you." I hear Annie say as she walks past my room. "Okay, thanks." I answer as I jump off the bed and walk to the Commanders office. I knock on the door. "Sir? This is Y/N, you called for me?" I say and he allows me in. "Yeah, I need you to clean the stables today. Annie doesn't want to, so it's up to you." I sigh and nod. "Yes, thank you Sir." I say as I turn to make my way to the stables.

"Ugh, why do I have to clean the disgusting, muck ridden stables, while everyone else is having fun and eating dinner?" I grumble to myself as I see the rest of the Cadets inside, having a fun time laughing and drinking. "Fuck this." I growl before throwing the shovel onto the ground and stopping. "Y/N!" I hear someone yell and I turn to my head only to get pulled into a tight hug. "W...what are you doing?!" I ask this mysterious person. "Corporal Levi?!" I ask in shock as I try to push away from him. "Don't you dare leave my squad again!" He orders, but it wasn't his normal voice, it was more....caring? "U...umm, corporal?" I ask as I try to get a clear view of his face. "Do you understand me?" He asks, back to his usual tone. "Y...Yes, Sir." I mutter in amazement. Had I actually managed to get some feelings through this concrete wall? I nervously put my arms around him as he hurried his face further into my neck. "Uh...corporal?" I ask as I pat his back uncomfortably. "What is it Y/N?" He asks and he looks at me. "H...have you been crying corporal?" I ask as I see his puffy red eyes. He jumps slightly and moves away from me. "No..." He says and I step forward, kneeling down and looking up at his hidden face.

"Yes, you have. Why?" I ask seriously. I hear him growling slightly before grabbing my wrist tightly. "Why do you have to know, huh?" He yells and I whimper in fear. "S...I'm sorry! Let me go, please." I beg as I try to to break away. He lets go and moves away from me. "God-damnit!" He says as he kicks a bucket. "Get your horse, you're coming back to my squad." He orders and I stare at him, holding my wrist in pain. "N...no..." I say as I take a few steps back. "What? Come on Y/N." He says and I shake my head, taking a few steps back. "No! I'm not going back there just to end up being raped!" I yell at him as tears fall from my eye. His eyes widen slightly and he walks towards me, eventually trapping me against a wall. "Listen to me Y/N." He says before grabbing my hand gently. "Just come back. I won't do it again, I'll explain it all in my office." He begs, and to my surprise, he was actually kind of crying. Not bawling, just tearing up. "O....ok, but if you do, I'm never going to go back to your squad again." I warn as I jump on my horse and follow him back.

Time Skip

I walk into Captain's office and sit down on his command. He removes his jacket and places it on the back of his chair. I jump slightly as he sits down next to me. "Please don't be scared of me any more..." He says as he grabs my hand and looks me in the eye. "I can't trust you, you know that." I say as I turn my head. "Please...look at me." He says softly as he grabs my chin gently. Why is he being so gentle? So caring? I think to myself as he pulls me around to face him. "Don't do this...." I beg as I try to look away. "Don't do what?" Hey asks as he hold my face gingerly, cupping my cheeks. "Don't give me hope..." I say before he begins wiping away any tears that had fallen onto my cheeks. "Y/N, I love you." He admits with a slight chuckle. "W...what?" I ask with wide eyes. He nods. "No, you can't. What about all those things that you did to me?" I ask and he frowns. "I didn't know how else to tell you, but I never intended to hurt you. I had no idea that what I was doing was putting so much pain on you." He says sadly. He sighs and lets go of me. "I'm sure you wouldn't want to accept my feelings now anyway. I....just don't leave me again. You can hate me all you like, but stay on my squad. I need to make sure you're safe." He says.

What is this? I ask myself as my heartbeat began to speed up and go at an indescribable pace. "Y/N?" Corporal asks, but his words sound as if I were underwater as my heartbeat began to drown out all sounds. I look down to his lip quickly before looking back up at him. I...I shouldn't... I think before scooting closer slowly. Another incoherent mumble came from my superior before I quickly moved up against him and kissed him. I cup his face in my hands before pulling away. "Y/N?" He asks and I smile a little before moving away. "I didn't like it because the way you acted during it scared me, but I...I l...like you too...Levi." I say with a blush and smile before he hugs me tightly. "Thank you." He whispers in my ear before I wrap my arms around him, hearing his whimpers.

I'll stay with you Levi. I'll always stay with you.

#aot #attack on titan #snk #shingeki no kyojin #levi ackerman #levi #x reader #reader insert #no spoilers #spoiler free

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