#no one wants to hear that its fucking weird

[revelboo]

Idk if you know this but wasps fucking. LOVE sugar and honey. Its what the adults usually eat iirc. Thats why Wasps usually go after bee hives (for multiple reasons, the bees become food for the larval wasps, its basically an all you can eat buffet, its also getting rid of competition, ect)

Anyways. All this to say: Waspinator finding the sugar/honey and being like "What. What is??? Smells weird, like antifreeze a bit. is it antifreeze?? (bc fun fact waaaay back in the day Antifreeze actually had a sweet taste that was super dangerous bc ppl would poison others with it so a bittering agent had to be added but like, i dont think that would be a thing for cybertronians so theyre used to mildly sweet antifreeze anyways-) Then he tastes it and is like OH FUCK YEAH LETS GOOOOOOO. But sadly sugar is SUPER BAD for vehicles like cars and stuff. So i imagine poor Waspinator goes on a sugar bender and then comes to like "Wha happun...." and hes aching and feels AWFUL, sprawled out in the barn, covered in christmas lights from someone else's house and SO much dirt and sand from like 6 different states and the human is just like "So. youre awake. Get up, i got the powerwasher. You're COVERED in dead bugs, youre not coming in my house."

Oh, I love this!

Worker Bee Pt 19

Waspinator x Reader

• Inhaling because you don’t have the energy to deal with his misguided ‘dating’ right now or even to try and figure out why he thinks that could ever work, you yank your hand out of his grip and he makes a noise of whining protest. But you can flex your fingers now even though they’re sore. Magic, alien bug spit. “Waspinator, sweetie. I have to report in to my boss and get some loan applications processed or I’m going to get fired.” And he’s just staring at you, head tilting. You’re pretty sure all he heard was ‘Waspinator blah blah blah.’ Right. “If I get fired I can’t afford food or my house.” That he’s pretty much trashed. “I’ll be homeless.” There’s a reaction, antenna back and wings buzzing. “You don’t want that, right?”

• “No,” he growls, wings humming and flaring out slightly. Because no one is taking little friend’s hive away. And you reach up and pat him on the cheek. ‘Great. So you just go watch cartoons, okay? And be quiet,’ you say, nudging him into the other room and he allows it, because you’re touching him voluntarily. Settling himself on the couch, he fidgets with the skinny control stick that makes the screen work like you’d shown him. Can hear you talking to someone else on the little screen he’s forbidden from touching. Why do you sound different talking to them? Venting in annoyance, he fidgets before slipping out of the hive to patrol. Too agitated at the idea of someone daring to try and take your home, his home.

• Somehow you manage to convince your boss that you’ve not been checking in because you’ve been deathly ill. Too ill to go to the doctor. At least, you pray he brought that lie. Catching up on loan applications, it’s a couple of hours before the quiet really registers. Maybe Waspinator is just being good. Watching cartoons. Teeth gritting, you can’t make yourself believe that. He’s got to be quietly destroying something. Or rooting up someone else’s azaleas to drag in your house to go with the other one. Dating. How are you going to explain to him that’s not happening?

• Roaming the property, his wings tuck close to his back against the cold. Heading through the trees surrounding your home, he moves in a widening spiral and vents softly when he leaves the trees and comes across a series of black boxes. That smell sweet. Circling one and toying with it, that scent is somewhat familiar. Sweet and cloying. Transforming he leans his upper body on the box and uses his mandibles to begin chewing through it to get to that delicious smell.

• Startling when you hear a boom, you inhale. Then there are several more in quick succession, you save your work and get up. Know the guy closest to you is a bit trigger happy, but if he’s shooting at skunks again and you have to smell a dead skunk for two weeks straight again, you’re going to- the house is quiet. Swearing, you run to get your boots and coat after realizing Waspinator isn’t in the house. Why would he go over there, though? The old man is coming out of the woods, face ruddy and wearing coveralls and slippers, a shotgun in his hands when you get outside into the snow. “Are you out of your mind?!” You scream at him, going with righteous indignation. And the old man hesitates but doesn’t lower the shotgun. ‘There’s a monster wasp. I saw it. Tore up my bee hives,’ he says, turning in a circle. “You’ve seen some whiskey. You even hear yourself? A monster wasp?” Feel bad as you say, trying to convince him he’s crazy to get him to leave. “Get the hell off my property before I call the cops!” And he’s scowling at you, insisting he saw it as you dig out your phone in threat and he starts moving. How much are bee hives? Because you’re going to owe him. Waiting until you’re sure he’s long gone, you head into the barn.

• Groaning and shivering uncontrollably, his head lifts when the hay he’d burrowed into is dug away from him. And his little friend has come to see him, eyes narrowed. “Waspinator’s frieeeend,” he drawls, feeling absolutely awful and jittery as he snares you with two limbs and drags you into the hay with him, curling his altmode around you, limbs grabbing on as you wriggle, screeching that’s he’s sticky. Very, very sticky. And feeling not quite overenergized, but close. Processor miserably buzzing as he rests his head on top of yours and curls tighter around your warmth.

• “Let go!” He’s back in his awful giant wasp form and he’s curling up like wasps do when they die. Is he dying? And he’s forcing you into a ball, legs drawn up to your chest as his thorax curls up. He’s humming now. Is he singing? Wait. Is he drunk? Arms now pinned to your chest, you can feel whatever he’s absolutely covered in sticking to you, too. Beehives. It’s honey. He’s covered in honey and dead bugs. And you are, too now. Why? Why is he like this? Legs shifting against you as he slurs ‘Waspinator’s little warm friiiiend.’ Wondering how long it’ll take him to sober up right as he makes a funny hitching noise and you’re thrashing to get away when he shudders and does it again. “Don’t you dare throw up honey on me-Waspinator! Don’t you dare!”

Previous

[justatypicalwizard]

Meta-isekai | K. Bakugo ✧ Act I Scene I

-`♡´- In which Bakugo gets isekaied into a shoyo romance. -`♡´-

Peak stupidity ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆

Act I 𓆩⚝𓆪

Scene I: What the fucking fuck?

𖹭 Katsuki woke up but not in his dorm room, rather in something that resembled his bedroom at home.

𖹭 What the fuck? He thought as he threw his legs over the bedsheets and stood up. Something was off. Was he stuck in a quirk?

𖹭 On his desk sat a fat black cat. Katsuki didn’t own a can so the sight of the animal caught him off guard.

𖹭 ‘’What the fuck?” He said out loud.

‘’Why are you cursing at me first thing in the morning?” The cat answered.

Katsuki’s hand shot in the air, straight into the cat's fluffy face. He gathered his strength and… nothing happened. Not even a spark from his palm.

‘’You’re acting weird.” The cat hummed and started licking its butt.

With eyes wide open Katsuki headed back towards the bed, hopped inside and curled under the sheets trying to cope with what was happening. This must be some kind of a quirk and he’s in danger now. The fight is happening around him but he doesn’t hear or feel anything because he’s under some sort of illusion. How can he get out?

‘’Going back to bed is not like you. Come on, we have stuff to do.” The cat persisted as it jumped on the bed sheets. ‘’Wait.’’ It zeroed in on Katsuki’s face, nearing him gently, paw after paw. ‘’You’re not my Katsuki.”

𖹭 Katsuki wanted to grab the cat to pin it in place but it slipped out of his fingers leaving only a few black hairs in the place he the blonde tried to grab him. Katsuki started to shout and jumped out of the bed trying to get close to the poor animal. This evoked a deafening hiss as the cat started to flee.

𖹭 The door slammed open and his angry mum entered the room. ‘’What the heck are you doing? Get ready for school, brat.” She shouted even louder than the cat and slammed the door back closed hard enough to make the walls shake.

𖹭 But Katsuki didn’t live with his mother anymore.

𖹭 ‘’Can you please stop trying to kill me? I see that something is wrong and I’m trying to work it out too!” The cat hid on the wardrobe. ‘’I told you, you’re not my Katsuki, what have you done with him?”

‘’How the hell am I not that Katsuki? There’s only one Katsuki and It’s me!”

‘’Nuh-uh.” The cat, very slowly, neared the crease of the wardrobe and jumped down. It sniffed the air next to where Katsuki was standing all the while observing the man. ‘’You’re from a different world.” It stated matter-of-factly. 

Katsuki wanted to start chasing the creature again for making him an idiot but the can was smarter this time.

‘’I know it sounds stupid but look around you! Is this your room?” This made his stop. ‘’Do you have a talking cat in your universe? And why are you trying to intimidate me with your open palm? Stop sticking it my way!” Shit, Katsuki’s done it instinctively.

‘’Listen, something is off and you are not the right Katsuki, not my Katsuki. You’re Not-Katsuki. I don’t know why this happened, I’ll try to find out though. Still you’re stuck with me here for a while so I night as well tell you my name.”

The cat hopped back on the desk, back bathing in the morning sun that made its fur shine in a weird pinkish manner.

‘’My name’s Black Cat and I’m your magical companion.” It bowed its head. ‘’My mission is, and has been for some time now, to help you achieve friendship and love. I’m like your Fairy Godmother. For the last year and a half I have been trying to help you and well it went…” Suddenly the cat went silent. 

‘’It went what?”

‘’Let’s just say I had more diligent love-students under my paws for the last eternity or so.” To which Katsuki could only blink a few times because he never thought he would hear such a sentence in his life. ‘’Whatever place you came from, good news is, I can send you back.”

‘’Thank god, do it now.”

“The problem is-” The blonde groaned and the cat hissed. “Listen to me brat! The problem is making you travel to a parallel dimension will cost an immense amount of power, and I don’t have such a reserve right now!”

‘’Then focus or some shit.”

“It’s not like that. My power comes from you, you and your friendships and loves.”

“What do you want me to do!” Katsuki’s voice was getting alarmingly loud again.

‘’Shut it unless you want your mum to come in again and see you talking to an empty desk. Only you can see me, dummy.” The cat stuck out its small tongue. “What you have to do is find friendship and love big enough to gather tons of energy for me.”

“I’m not buying that shit.”

“Just, listen to me please. I want my Katsuki back. Besides you don’t know whether my Katsuki isn’t in your place now. What world do you come from?”

𖹭 Suddenly, Katsuki imagined a random guy, version of himself or whatever, with not idea what a quirk is, standing in his shoes. This could cost him all the hard work he’d put in over the years to become a hero. Heck, that guy could kill someone by accident if he never used his quirk.

𖹭 “I need to go back. Me, I mean him, everyone else, fuck it this is a piece of shit situation.”

Katsuki started to pace the room with the cat observing him carefully.

‘’What? My Katsuki is going to kill someone in your world?”

‘’I have a quirk - a superpower where I can create explosions out of my hands. It took me years to get rid of the reflex of exploding something anytime I got irritated. How do you think a version of me that never experienced this quirk will react?”

“Oh shit. We need to get you back quickly.”

“Mhm.” Katsuki nodded.

“Okay, listen. I know how we can pool enough energy for me to send you back.”

“I’m listening.”

The cat straightened and crossed his hands as if he was a human.

“For the last year and a half I’ve been trying to help my Katsuki by creating some meaningful friendships and confessing love to his crush. It did go somewhere, at least on the friends part, but not enough for me to ascend (so essentially leave him). If you could, in a short period of time, achieve what he couldn’t in over a year, we might be able to gather a lot of power that would not run away if you’re quick.”

“So, make friends and get a girl.”

“Essentially.”

“You’re lucky I’m good at winning.” Katsuki smirked.

“Well, it would be a win-win-win honestly. You’d go back to your world. My Katsuki would come back here straight into his dream-come-true and I could finally leave him.”

“You don’t seem to like him/me.”

“I’m more on the lazy side while my Katsuki was a handful.” The cat lied down showing its belly. “But there’s one thing I must warn you about. I am tied to my Katsuki, not you. As my Katsuki is somewhere in your hand-explosion world he can no longer make wishes and dreams about this reality. What this means is that if you fail to make his highschool dreams come true you’ll most probably be stuck in this world forever. Stuck with me at that because I can only leave you if you’re happy enough or dead. You have only one shot at this. Also, if it’ll take you too long to make all the wishes come true I won’t be able to gather enough power at one time to blast you back home.

Are you still in?”

Katsuki neared the desk which made the cat stumble onto its side. The morning sun made the blonde’s eyes glint with irritation but a smirk was plastered on his face. Crossing his arms on his chest he looked down on the cat.

“I already told you I always fucking win.”

“Please never tell me about your homeworld. I don’t want to know what mended you into this shape.”

[bebechichi22]

mdni

groupie! john soap mactavish x band bitch! reader

Task force 141 goes out pub hopping to celebrate a successful mission. The third pub they get to is nearly empty—which is weird, since its a Saturday. It’s not until they hear the muffled music from the backroom they connect the dots.

Naturally, they pay their 5 pounds for a stamp after grabbing their drinks and head in to listen to whatevers playing.

In comes your rocker chick ass, hammering out chords, spitting out lyrics to a crowd of drunk 20-60 year old men.

Johnny is in-fucking-love, i mean, you’re obviously good with your hands, an irresponsible amount of tattoos and he’s be lying if he said he didn’t chub up a little at the way your fishnets stretched around your thighs.

Johnny’s in a daze, the most focused he’s ever been in his life. He stands in awed silence watching you play, the condensation on his long forgotten Guinness drips down his hand as he watches you.

He sways a bit to the music, it’s like everything else blurred, a vignette and all he could see was the way your lips curled around the mic and the way your guitar strap travels up the valley between your tits.

It’s not until you catch his devoted eyes that he’s got a full hard-on. Dead in the eyes and your little cocky smirk even throws his confident disposition off a little. The rest of the show (much to the chagrin of the rest of the team) is spent with you guys eye-fucking eachother, by the end Johnny is not so subtly palming himself through his denim.

It’s no surprise while your band packs up you ask if he wants to check out backstage.

Cut to you shoved up on some big speaker, fishnets ripped around your ankles. You can feel the switches and dials dig into your stomach every time he fucks himself into you. Johnny is unrelenting, thought a girl like you would appreciate something a little more up tempo.

By the time you guys are thoroughly fucked out and he’s bid you goodbye with a sloppy kiss and a smack on the ass. You realise you never actually caught his name. You shrug it off as you pack up, he was a good fuck anyways.

Unbeknownst to you Johnny nabbed one of your flyers, stuffing into his jacket pocket on the way out. By the end of the night he’s got all your songs downloaded and followed every social media you have. So it’s no surprise when you catch his blue eyes from the crowd of your next gig.

[grifff17]

Audiodrama Sunday 2/9/2025

Happy Audiodrama Sunday! So much good stuff this week. Ylelmore season finale, Courier's Call season premiere, a great reveal in Unend, and Lost Terminal is back!

NEW SHOW ALERT At the Bottom of the Garden - Interesting show, I’m not sure I’ve ever listened to an audiodrama quite like this. I’m still unclear how much of this show is fiction, which I think is by design.

@storiesfromylelmore - the hard cut from Elas’s drama to Keryth and Rion in complete chaos with the river monster was incredible. Loved the sneaky little post credit scene. A character in the universe of a podcast listening to the podcast is such a funny premise. I'm sad the season is done already, it feels like it just started.

@midstpodcast - Oh shit some remnants of the Trust are still around. Great worldbuilding in this episode. The naturalist is Tziela???? That's such a crazy thing to reveal so casually.

Skyjacks: Courier’s Call - The kids are back together! Kieran’s haircut being a reminder of Alba is actually heartbreaking. I'm curious to see what happens when June meets back up with her parents, they did not part on good terms.

@campaignskyjacks - Random thoughts as I continue to listen through this show: I love Captain Orimar but he’s truly terrifying. Gable is a fallen angel? The scars on their back are from their wings! I really want to learn more about the Church of the Slain God. It’s insane that Dref is the most normal of the PCs.

Starwhal: Odyssey - “Have you ever fucked a Hydra” is such a great hard ending to an episode. I'm so excited to see the Usegoni try to capture and transport a living Hydra.

Find Us Alive - back from the hiatus! I would absolutely attend Hole!. Building a scale model of the place you’re trapped in in Minecraft is hilarious. And holy shit they’ve made contact with the outside! I had theorized that the memetic effect somehow prevented the outside signal from coming through while Harley was in the room, but I guess not.

@lostterminalpod - Its back for a new season! What is this weird cyborg monster? This has become a comfort shot for me and it's so nice to be hearing from Seth again.

@breakerwhiskey - I finally caught up on last 2 listener messages and responses. It makes me want to submit one. I never got around to submitting a question to either of the fictional advice shows I listen to, though, so I doubt I ever will.

I'm realizing that I listened to 3 different One Shot Podcast Network shows this week. They just make exactly the style of APs that I enjoy: narrative heavy, rules light, collaborative, audio only, and not DnD.

[apocalympdicks]

my tumblr bios a liar im fucking 25

(no one believes me irl cuz im 4'11 & im visibly autistic)

[mephoj]

late night chat

[cybertron-smash-or-pass]

TF One D-16

[morninkim]

As a show of good faith toward the remaining Decepticons at the beginning of a new, united Cybertron, newly appointed Senators Bumblebee and Soundwave allowed Shatter and Dropkick to enlist into Autobot City's Defense Team.

These two turned out to be... not the best choices.

The city may have fallen to Insurgent Decepticon occupation had it not been for young recruits Hot Rod and Arcee's accidental interception of Shatter's communication with the fugitive Starscream.

To replace the errant Defense Team members, Springer and Blurr were reassigned from Iacon to Autobot City in their stead.

[namelessprince]

MY BEAUTIFUL RIPTIDE OCS... their names are catalina and milo avery <3 catalina's a water genasi, and milo's a tiefling :] !!

[sejarcus-archive]

Sejanus is like Chappell Roan in the sense that he was only ever meant to be loved by queer people, but it got out of hand, and now there’s way too many cishets who don’t get him, expressing opinions about him.

Sejanus I’m sorry that your character keeps getting absolutely murdered and turned into everything you’re not, just cause a bunch of straight girls wanna fuck the actor who played you in that horrible adaptation, and keep projecting their fantasies onto you, and aside from how bad that is, they won’t even admit the objective truth that the actor was actually a terrible pick for you and he doesn’t fit you at all

[waitingx2xdie]

@xnoraxcarpenterx asked: “Ah ha… Not yet; your underwear is staying on for now. I’m not done just yet…”

Blink. Blink. Blink. Darcy shook her head as she poured a cup of coffee for the new customer sitting at the counter. What the Hell was that? Some kind of vision? Or maybe she was just daydreaming? A few more blinks and she took a breath, heading back to the counter and sliding the coffee across the laminate countertop toward the fellow blonde. "Here you go, one caffe macchiato~ with EXTRA sweetener and cream." A small pause and she pointed to the foam decor. "I even put a little heart in there for ya." A smile as she reached for a cleaning rag to wipe down the counter only to freeze at the sound of the woman's voice. There was NO MISTAKING IT. The voice in her little daydream right now. It had belonged to HER... A deep breath and she spun back on her heel. "Have we met before?"

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Hi I've never sent in an ask before sorry but I wanted to point out the thing fueling my copium for Professor X in Rivals is that, sure, Charles died in Magneto's Rivals lore but also if u read Magneto's first lore story technically his Wanda died too, but Wanda in the game because she's from another timeline where Erik died and she became Sorceress Supreme (presumably because Strange died in her timeline as well) SO TECHNICALLY BECAUSE THE GAME'S LORE PREMISE THAT MULTIPLE TIMELINES ARE CONVERGING DUE TO THE DOOMS' BEEF WITH EACHOTHER WE COULD GET CHARLES FROM ANOTHER TIMELINE and i think the cherik nation can cook with this ☝️ -poro anon

i need charles from an alt timeline in rivals and i need him and erik to make out sloppy style while crying in front of everyone during their reunion

[rainingincale]

.

[blujayonthewing]

[guy who lives in lowkey constant fear of being flanderized and infantalized and flattened and misunderstood and not taken seriously as an entire human person with complex thoughts and feelings in real life] yeah I dunno why I feel so strongly and get so defensive about Fantasy Racism and fantasy-race stereotyping it's just a really big sticking point for me for some mysterious reason

[creativebrainrot]

my least favorite phenomenon ever is "you can be disabled (the quirky steroetype that lives in my head) as long as youre not disabled (actually weird and atypical in nonsensical & non-conventionally palettable ways)"

[purgemarchlockdown]

The temptation to vague about something in the milgram-confessions blog because its something thats bothered me for Actual Years about certain fandoms vs letting it go because when it is brought up its actually done somewhat tastefully and reasonably which makes me happy and this anon probably didnt mean it in the incredibly bad faith way I keep on seeing it be repeated so really Im getting upset over nothing.