#no no no no no fine im fine cant be 10 months old
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synthshenanigans · 5 months ago
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what do you MEAN its already been half a year since the WWPH?????
AND SINCE WHEN WERE THE POWER HOURS ABOUT TO START TURNING A FULL YEAR OLD??
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haemosexuality · 11 months ago
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i feel like im probably gonna be talking about this a lot here since i cant talk to Her about it and it really is bothering me so much
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squidlykitten · 7 months ago
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I hate being so fucking poor hhh
I really do like my job and my boss but like...
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bmpmp3 · 7 months ago
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I NEEED to go back to making art that makes it ABUNDANTLY clear that theres something wrong with my brain BUT NOT in a cool or stylishly interesting way. i need to do it in a way that makes people say "hm." and walk away
#sowwy ive been kinda going through it in my fine arts major rn can u tell HJKSDHKFd#ive been feeling like. scared. and paralyzed by marketability and branding.#i cant stop thinking about how other people will see my art. but not like in a good way#when i was younger i thought about it in a good way. like hee hee hoo hoo the act of looking connected us hee hee#but rn i keep thinking about it in like this wretched like consumer product mindset? ouhhghhhhh el problema es el capitalismo#and like maybe this works for some people. to think like this. to make art like this. its what my professors push me towards#not intentionally. they dont say it out loud at least. im not sure if they know or not some of the irony#my professors are nice and pretty smart and talented and i like em. but sometimes i wonder like. the push for us as students to make like#marketable 'avant garde'? stuff thats safe but pretending to be weird and out there#i dont mean to sound pretentious. in general i play it too safe myself (spent too much time as an edgy 10 year old with my#parents freaking out over my shoulder because they think the fact that i drew an anime character frowning means something serious LOL)#but i dunno man. my least interesting art with the least amount of care thought or effort always gets so much more attention in school#nowhere else oddly. online? people like my more passionate but seemingly frivolous art (oc art etc. not frivolous to me but yknow how it is#same with irl artists and other industry people outside my school. whats going on in my school LOL#i know from experience i cant push myself into a supposedly marketable brand. if i try to make something sell it will not.#i dont know why. maybe theres an invisible essence buyers can tell when i didnt care jkfsldjdfrds#but my teachers LOOOOVE the stuff i put no passion in its so bizarre orz but i gotta relearn how to ignore half of their advice#i used to be better at it. but i also only used to ignore like a quarter of their advice. maybe i need to amp up how much im ignoring#that sounds mean. they have plenty of good advice. but also plenty of advice thats clouded by their own biases#and i gotta relearn how to sort out this stuff again. i forget every few months for some reason#you know i always think ouuhhhhh i act so neurotypical ouhhhhhhhhh im outgoing i talk to strangers all the time i seem confident#im so masked IM SO MASKED but then i go a couple weeks where every conversation i have has people looking at me like#i have two heads and neither of them are speaking their language. and then i descend into madness like this HJKLDSHJDS#i'll be fine i'll figure it out. i need to stop trying to get a good grade in being a 'cutting edge' conventional artist <3#i need to just. draw my cartoon characters in peace 😔😔😔
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skyburger · 5 months ago
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okay the good news is i found the post its real i remembered it correctly and everything. a christmas miracle! the bad news is half an hour ago i was trying to get a screenshot of the post and it was a bit too long to get in one screenshot and i thought ughhhh i dont want to stitch together two screenshots. i have learned a lesson today and that is "don't use the full-screen screenshot on ios safari it's not even a fucking picture its a pdf you have to make INTO a png if you want to crop it and the full fucking image is so stupidly long (its a bit over 14 megabytes) it will be a hassle to crop and when you crop it oh its still gonna be like 1500 pixels wide so you think oh ill scale it down but if you scale it down in ibis the quality goes to shit even if i change the method and im Not manually dragging the corner to size it down and then cropping the canvas (this was a better idea i shouldve listened) so you have this low res screenshot of this post youve been trying to get for half an hour and after all that you think Oh my fucking god i shouldve just stitched two screenshots together."
anyway shoutsout to op of the post... hi 👋
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does anyone have the post about someone convincing their friend (possibly op's boyfriend?) that there was a real matt damon movie with some dumbass name and they edited the cover of "the bourne identity" (see image #1) to have the fake title but all i can think of is "the turgle" but im pretty sure im mixing it up with the "who turgled" comic (see image #2). Help!!!!
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#my stupid phone in ten minutes managed to go 90% -> 70% -> maybe dead or maybe crashed -> actually dead#and then it stayed dead another 10-15 minutes but it turned on and was at 80% again.#in comparison i used my ipad to do this and i think it literally went down 1%#in at least twice that time.#so between that and the way 85% of the time my phone is hot enough to hurt my hands a little bit? i should probably get a new phone soon#im not going to though! im nothing if not stubborn and i like my iphone 5se that cant have the latest ios anymre.#i know all the ins & outs of how it works! i can do everything i want to do on there! i have no need#and also ive had beef with the lack of headphone jacks and home buttons since they started doing that on iphones#which was like 7 or 8 years ago now. But why the fuck would you do that. and why did they make phones BIGGER!!!!!#how is it supposed to fit ANYWHERE.#and now you may say oh why dont you switch to android? and i would sigh because youre literally 100% right i SHOULD have an android.#i know this. ive known this for Years. but im too fucking used to ios!!!!!! like i KNOWWWW android suits my needs better.#my first phone which i had for like? a month? idk why i had that actually. it was an android and it was just fine for me#that one specifically had not even a GB of storage though i think i could only have one small app downloaded. two really small ones Maybe#but like. augh!!!! augh!!!!!!!!! im nothing if not a stubborn old man at heart and i hate change even when i know itsliterally not that bad#but actually rambling abt this has made me actually think about it lots and i probably will get an android when* i get a new phone#(* its not even an ''if'' at this point. the writing is on the wall TT_TT#i just googled it to make sure i had the right phrase (i did) but apparently that phrase comes from a bible story. TIL#ijust always thinkof simon & garfunkel when i hear someone say that. the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls!)#ok thats it 4 now tysm for watching remember to SMASH that like button and SUBSCRIBE if you wanna seemore!!!!!! (#(my youtuber outro starts playing)#muffin mumbles#edit like a minute later: oh shit i spent an hour typing these tags. my bad
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sofs16 · 1 year ago
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perceval shark
charles! fake photographer x singer!reader
HEY! i know that may sound alarming as he is a fake but its quite silly… i think… im about to write it so enjoy <3
— just finished writing; not proofread at all
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yn.yln
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yn.yln hi friends! im currently looking for a photographer to join me on tour for the next month since my cousin (usual photographer) got injured and can’t travel:( send me a message or email in my bio and ill send more deets:) thanks a lot!!! 💌
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ynsphoto will she acc reply to like millions of people tho 😭
⤷ yn.yln i really am trying but my instagram dms are glitching now 🫠 my team and i have replied to most of the emails tho:))
july 31, 2023
— mail app, you’ve got 16,483 inbox!
INBOX
From: Charles Perceval >
To: Yn Yln >
July 31, 2023 at 4:18
Hello, Yn!
If you are still in need of a photographer, I would love to help out!
Though I have no real experience aside from taking pictures of my friends, I have a large passion for music as you do.
I hope to hear from you:)
P.S Here is a link to some of my work. Have a good day:)
All the best,
Charles Perceval
NEW EMAIL
To: Charles Perceval >
From: Yn Yln >
Subject: reply asap pls :))
July 31, 2023 at 11:01
Hey, Charles!
I’ve really spent quite a while being mesmerized at your photos and I would loveeee if you could come with us on tour this month!!
The notice is quite short but the schedule would be August 4 to August 28 with us circling Europe. Let me know if there’s any issues and we could work around it:)
Hope to hear from you as well.
All the love,
Yn Yln 🤍
To: Yn Yln
From: Charles Perceval
July 31 at 16:22
Hello, Yn!
I am so glad! There may be a minor issue but could maybe we could talk about it on Instagram.
Would that be alright?:)
All the best,
Charles
Charles Perceval
charles_jpg • Instagram
12 Followers • 83 Posts
Following you since 2017
yn 💌
i must say, the 12 followers and private account is very sketchy, perceval 🤷🏻‍♀️
Charles Perceval
Hello Yn! Why are you judging me on my followers 😂
yn💌
NO IM NOT
im just saying i hope you dont rob me when we meet in real life 😔
Charles Perceval
Thank you for the trust in me. But I would not do that to you😁
yn 💌
sigh.. i guess it’s my fault if i end up dead in a ditch… ANYWAYS!
are you free to meet tomorrow 😁
Charles Perceval
Where exactly?
yn💌
Where are you now?
Charles Perceval
Spa
yn💌
you’re.. in a spa?
Charles Perceval
No! Spa, Belgium
yn💌
that one was NOT on me! But perfect the first stop there is actually Belgium! I can go there if it’s not a problem for you?
Charles Perceval
It is no problem for me:)
yn💌
Charles, don’t take this personally or rudely, but how old are you?
Charles Perceval
26 This October
yn💌
alright! just making sure youre not an old man😁
Charles Perceval
Aw, thank you.
yn💌
my manager will send more details, thanks charles and see you tomorrow:)
charles.jpg
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yn.yln
belgium
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yn.yln i may look fine but i have been hiccuping for the last 2 hours i fret i am getting a six pack
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ynsbabe i bet if u turned it to a sing, it’d be a bop
⤷ yn.yln too emotional to turn it into a song
august 2, 2023
yn.updated
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yn.updated yn.yln just landed in Belgium where she will be performing for the first time this Friday!
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liviesyn streets say she went to dinner with a guy 💔😭😭😭😭😭😭
⤷ ynsday chill. she can have guy friends
⤷ author not this one ���
august 2, 2023
ynshit
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ynshit NOT WHAT I EXPECTED EMAILING THIS MAN.
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oliviarodrighoe cant believ u didnt know charles leclerc THATS SO SO SUTPID IM LAUGJGING
⤷ ynshit HE SAID PERCEVAL DUMBASSSSS
⤷lauflaufey if he said leclerc would you have known anyway😭
⤷ ynshit 🙂
⤷ oliviarodrighoe how did you even find out
⤷ ynshit HE TOLD ME BCUZ HE’S LIKE A SHIT LIAR (thank you very much)
reneewrap did you hire him anyways
⤷ ynshit yes… MAN IS RICHER THAN ME THO
⤷ oliviarodrighoe HAHAHAHAHAHA
⤷ ynshit fuck you
⤷oliviarodrighoe or…
⤷ ynshit STOP
august 3, 2023
charles_jpg
yn.yln has requested to follow you. 4d
confirmed | decline
— instagram notification!
• yn.yln has followed charles_jpg and charles_leclerc!
charles.jpg
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charles.jpg Thank you, Lewis for the camera 😘
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lewis.jpg Anytime mate! yn yes, thank you lewis hamilton
[liked by charles.jpg]
august 3, 2023
ynswife
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ynswife what do you MEAN yn followed charles leclerc on his main AND jpg acc which NO ONE ELSE BUT THE GRID AND HIS FAMILY FOLLOWS. view all 3,485 comments
ynsferrari bro has been liking all of yns posts since 2015 with that acc 😭😭😭😭
august 3, 2023
yn.yln
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yn.yln belgium 🤍 got a special guy with us too
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charles_leclerc Sooo excited for this month! ⤷ yn.yln bring it on, perceval;)
maxverstappen1 🎉
taylorswift Gorgeous! ⤷ yn.yln i told u guys that song was abt me
august 3, 2023
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc London 😎📷
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yn.yln youre so talented, perceval:,) you make me like my smile
⤷charles_leclerc Haha thank you, ynn. You have an pretty smile to begin with! ⤷ lestappen1661 I can hear the church bells
charles1166 no because the way charles always captures her best moments like the happiness in the first slide and how she’s literally a star on the 2nd 😭
august 6, 2023
FERR4RI.YLN
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FERR4RI.YLN “you make my like my smile” “you have a pretty smile to begin with” OH ITS OVER FOR US
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ylnleclerc MOM AND DAD
august 6, 2023
yn.yln
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yn.yln my turn to jpg 🤭
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charles_leclerc Loving the first slide ❤️
⤷ yn.yln thanks!
oliviarodrgio ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🩹❣️❤️💗💟😘
⤷ yn.yln fuck off. f1rraris yn sitting with charles on the plane😭 his whipped smile😭 them eating together😭 the heart emoji😭
august 8, 2023
yn.updated
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yn.updated yn sings unreleased song “slut” at monaco soundcheck today?!?! some lyrics :
• “got love struck, went straight to my head”
• “and if they call me a slut you know if might be worth it for once”
• “everyone wants him that was my crime”
• “i break down then he’s pulling me in. in a world of boys, he’s a gentleman”
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chleclercs bye. august 10, 2023
yn.yln
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yn.yln monacoooo!!! thanks for being so kind to me and charles:,)
august 10, 2023
yn.yln
monaco
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yn.yln a day in shark lerklerk’s life
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lewishamilton shark lerklerk
⤷ maxverstappen1 shark lerklerk
⤷ fernandoalo_oficial shark lerklerk
⤷ pierregasly shark lerklerk
⤷ landonorris shark lerklerk
charles_leclerc 🤦‍♂️
⤷ yn.yln💆🏼‍♀️
cru3lsumma entering gf yn time.
august 11, 2023
ynshit
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ynshit this isnt funny im ac down bad. ITS BEEN LIKE 10 DAYS
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oliviarodrighoe MATCHMAKER ERA 🙋‍♀️
august 11, 2023
sharkie !!❤️
ynn💗
sharkie! wana dinner 2nite 🎉
sharkie !!❤️
Of course! Where should I pick you up? :)
ynn💗
my my what a gentleman
at the hotel we’re staying in🤷🏻‍♀️
sharkie !!❤️
see you:)
ynshit
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ynshit HE LET ME EAT IN HIS CAR. …… 🙂
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laufey oh she’s whipped! oliviarodrighoe LALALALALALAL HELLO?
august 11, 2023
charles_leclerc
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charlec11 the random an posting no caption is so bf
yn.yln wait. why do i look snatched here.
⤷ charles_leclerc You most certainly are ;)
⤷ f1111zoom HOLD TH E PHONEZ
august 15, 2023
yn.yln
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yn.yln little ep out now:)
[ COMMENTS DISABLED ]
august 22, 2023
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc Might as well be worth it for once❤️
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yn.yln thanks for the last pic, love 🧘‍♀️
yn.yln STOPP IM GOING TO MISS YOU FOR TOUR
⤷ charles_leclerc you could always come to the pasdock😘
⤷ yn.yln WAGGING HERE I COME
august 25, 2023
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pathetickuroo · 2 months ago
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fukutora hcs bc theyre funny
- fukunaga shohei #1 lover of badddd bad bad bad movies. terrible films. not good. we're talking sharknado snakes on a plane willys wonderland velocipastor that one thanksgiving slasher film that i cant remember the name of rn (dont think abt the mechanics of it being a thanksgiving movie too hard). generally not a movie enjoyer i think but most certainly clocking in for shit that is Not Good
- tora is baffled every time but definitely not opposed to it (this guy loves cuddling on the couch i think he hits the fake yawn arm around shoulders maneuver like. regularlyyyy and fukunaga doesnt even pretend to think its silly anymore)
- "shohei this movie doesnt even make any sense" "🤷"
- tora the hugger from behind of All Time he is finding any possible excuse. "u look cold" or "makin up for lost time" or "i have practice in an hour plsss plssssss just let me have this PLSSSSSSS" (he uses that one in particular a lot) (fukunaga wouldnt have said no in the first place) (he thinks its cute so he doesnt say anything abt it)
- repressed-as-hell hs tora did not quiteee know what to do w whatever tf he had goin on so he didnt get the guts (ha) to say anything until a couple years after graduation (which he then said over text bc yokohama -> tokyo = long distance)
- fukunaga conveys thoughts in as few words as possible (which is fucking awesome btw if fukunaga has no fans it means ive died) BUT in order to preserve the meaning it sometimes takes a second to respond
- tora did Not have a good time attempting to navigate this when he was trying to confess
- bro immediately started freaking out to yaku "DUDE WHY DID I DO THAT THAT WAS SO STUPID" "omfg its fukunaga give him a second. impatient ass" "I THINK IM DYING" "jfc"
- meanwhile in tokyo fukunaga was staring at "i rly like u dude" trying to figure out if tora meant like (homie) or like (w/gay intent)
- fukunaga only ever calls tora by his full government given name when he is Displeased. tora used the pan he needed for dinner tn so now he has to wash it? taketora. tora rearranges his living room w no warning? taketora. doesnt even say it in a mean/angry tone or anything j matter of fact as all hell. honestly i think if fukunaga was ever genuinely angry abt smth hell would probably freeze over
- tora does get extremely pouty abt it tho. "shoheiii what did i do :(" "the pan" ".......OH FUC—"
- when tora first moved to yokohama he got a cat bc of course he did he graduated from nekoma. tf else was he supposed to do, get a dog? (maybe in the future)
- very very fluffy very cute very sweet tuxedo girl. her name is "destroyer" (yes really) he calls her badass on the reg and she is sooo cuddly w him. fukunaga finds all of this extremely funny
- in fact when fukunaga starts visiting suddenly destroyer doesnt gaf abt tora anymore. worse than pain of death in his opinion it is So Not Fair. first thing fukunaga does after he meets the cat is send a pic to the old nekoma gc "top 10 cats that like me more than they like their owners" tora throws a pillow at him "i RAISED her from a BABY" "did u rly" ".....NO BUT IT AINT RIGHT"
- after theyve been together a few months toras thinkin abt how fukunaga used to Never Talk Ever and he makes a joke "ha i guess i learned how to speak BODY language am i right. right shohei. thats funny right"
- fukunaga calls him taketora for a week. tora retires that joke permanently and they never speak of it again
- tora morning person fukunaga not-exactly-a-night-owl-but-doesnt-love-being-awake-at-5:30 person. one time fukunagas in yokohama for the weekend he wakes up at 6 annoyed as hell (tora got up at 5 and left for a run) bc wtf his pillow literally got up and walked away. falls back asleep wakes up again at 10 tora made not only coffee but pancakes too AND heated them up for him hes immediately like ok nvm this is fine actually no complaints (<- still gets annoyed when his human teddy bear ditches him)
- TORA BABE SAYER. hey babe thanks babe i missed u babe. but it took him foreverrrrrr (forever) to get comfortable actually saying it instead of thinkin inside so there was also (and still is) a lot of dude (romantic) bro (romantic) man (romantic).
- fukunaga doesnt like saying pet names or anything (but to be fair does he like saying ANYTHING most of the time) but does not mind being called them at all (that's a lie he thinks it's awesome and so so so sweet but when tora asks if it's okay he says he doesn't mind)
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sieglinde-freud · 2 months ago
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after last post i started rly thinking about whether or not these guys are good enough for the second gen girls/are red flags or not so i put it in a list. wont be budging on this but i can offer an explaination under cut. coming from the perspective a woman who doesnt like men but has friends that do (an important detail. trust me)
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Brady: easiest green flag and the only one! he’s sweet, he plays music, he makes tea, he rides horses, and his face is canonically unappealing so even if he cant fight, you’re probably still safe walking around with him. and even if you’re not, well, he’s a healer. you’ll be fine. 10/10 and once you get used to his face hes kind of cute. i think. if nothing else, he’s maribelle’s son, so he’s probably rich. get that bag, babe!
Owain: total sweetie, loyal, and would name his sword after you. take that as you will. unfortunately his mom won’t allow him to be a nepo baby so hes canonically broke as hell, and what little gold he does have will probably be spent on some of the ugliest jewelry you’ve ever seen. i hope you dont like peace and quiet. 7/10.
Yarne: he’s nice but he has the worst case of anxiety anyone has ever seen in their life so good luck with that. pros: can turn into a rabbit! cons: doesnt wear pants. but i dont judge what youre into. if you were in a horror movie he’d throw you in front of the killer and run. with some xanax he’ll be fine 6/10.
Morgan: debated whether or not i should rank him but were coming at this from a non robin perspective as im trying to pair off the second gen girls right now? so hes here. and unfortunately, favorite son status cant stop this guy from being towards the bottom half. he’s a sweetie for sure, but three months in and you’ll realize he’ll always love his mom more than you. -5000 points but my scale doesnt go that low. 4/10. might forget your name.
Inigo: well, he won’t cheat on you, but its not for lack of trying. 5’7 and really annoying about it. will abandon you for 5 years with the excuse “well this old man REALLY needed my help” get over yourself. his waist will be smaller than yours. 3/10.
Laurent: on the surface, he looks like an unassuming nerd boy. do not fall for it. thats how they get you. underneath all that cursive flowery talk you cant understand is a raging incel betting to be let loose. watch yourself. youre not gonna match his freak, babe, you cant even order extra fries with your sandwich. and!! his hat is stupid!!! 1/10.
Gerome:
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krippe90 · 8 months ago
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Some life hacks I've gathered in my ripe old age (33 years old)
If you use Spotify: make a new playlist for every month (you can have near identical playlists with none or just a few songs changing, it's fine!) - Very fun to rediscover old songs and take trips down memory lane. I also put every months playlist into one big playlist at the end of the year for that particular year. It also keeps you from having huge playlists with songs you never get to as you switch out the top 10-20 spots on it. Trust me, this is a game changer.
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Make a bookmarks folder where you save things you wanna buy but aren't sure if you REALLY want it or if it's really needed or maybe you dont got enough money for it atm - I have a bad habit of impulse buying, so when I see something I wanna get I put it in my WTB ("Want to Buy") folder and leave it there for some time. When I get into some money I look in the folder, and if I feel like I no longer want that thing, it gets removed. If I want it over the other needful things in the WTB folder, it gets bought. - In my folder right now I got some real nice whiskey I wanna try but can't afford, some stupid shirts I don't REALLY need because I got a fuckload of shirts I still enjoy wearing, fancy art supplies that I really don't need atm because I'm still shit at arting (but feel like I should get if I still paint after a year or so), some subscriptions to patreons I wanna sub to but won't because lack of stable income, etc etc. (also got some thing for removing earwax in there not sure why.. maybe my ear felt clogged?)
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In fact, make MANY bookmark folders! Don't leave shit in 100s of tabs! I keep at most 3-5 tabs open at any time (except when coding, then it can be as many as 20), and I keep them organized and when I'm done with what I'm doing and wanna come back to a page I save them into their specific folder.
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4. Don't be afraid to look in a mirror or wipe your ass when you're doing psychadelics! Fear is the mind killer!
5. FUCK TUMBLR STUPID FUCKING POST MAKING I CANT MAKE THE NUMBERED LIST WITH IMAGES NOR EDIT THE NUMBERS AFTER PASTING THE IMAGE!!
Fuck this im not doing anymore of these
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alisria · 7 months ago
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i know i am just smad because im tired and in pain and havent eaten in 12 hours and have no plans to but
i think as i approach 30 i am really starting to lose my mind a little bit about how ive spent 27 years putting my life on hold until X. like oh i will go out and do new things when i have X. i cant enjoy travelling until i have X. i cant be happy until i have X. and like. X doesnt seem possible anymore. i dont have the willpower to make it happen. i dont care enough. because i never gave myself anything to care about because that was something that would come after X. well what the fuck do i do when X never comes? feel like this forever? because ive certainly been dealing with that reality my entire life. and i can look at my friends and see they dont need X to be happy and thats fine and im so glad for them and i dont WANT them to need X but i do.
and it's like. okay well if X is my obstacle, what are the steps i need to take to get X? okay well join your support groups. go to your doctor. get more doctors. beg for help with X from them. from your family. and then the support groups say "you dont want it enough", the doctors say "you shouldnt want X at all", and your family doesnt answer your pleas because what you want doesn't matter, you dont want it enough, you should be doing other things, etc. and it's like. all my life i have felt like an absolutely massive part of me is missing. and the only thing that will fix it is X. doctor will give you vyvanse. doctor will give you all the hormones you can dream of without you even fucking asking. doctor will offer gender affirming surgery you dont even want. but you beg for X, you beg for help just getting closer to X, you write out a page of reasons why X would get you closer to finally feeling like a real person, like yourself, a self you havent even fucking met yet at nearly 30 years old, and doctor goes "ehhh well you need to learn to be happy without X. because you can't have it." and its like well girl what the FUCK do i do because thats the only thing ive literally ever wanted and i've structured my entire life over the pipe dream of maybe having it someday and i CANT have anything else until i have X and they kind of shrug and give you another doctor that goes yeah no you dont get a diagnosis and nothing is wrong with you and i wont help you get X so no more appointments call me if you need me but doctor i am fucking pagliacci.
and there's that nagging thought, that if i get X, nothing will change. the support groups tell you this. nothing will change. you will still be socially inept, you will still be mentally ill with agoraphobia, you will still struggle every fucking day of your life with choices that tear you apart. and i can hear that for 10 years and still feel incomplete without it. i am defective goods and i need a part installed and people either say "well you dont need that part to work!" "you can be happy without the part!" "you can never have the part, even if you get it installed it will never work so why even bother?" and this is supposed to feel like support. this is supposed to be positivity. but it's not. maybe it is for other people. but it isnt for me. but i can have hormones if i want!!!!! here you can transition wont that make you feel better!!!!! wont that make you hate yourself less!!!!! have as many hormones as you want!!!!!!!
and on tuesday im going to go to the doctor and smile and say everythings great im fine physiotherapy is working the meds are working everything is perfect see you in 3 months when i am quite literally rotting inside and there is no cure
im going to bed
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chaos-shifts-111 · 4 months ago
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ask game — 🐞
also tell me absolutely everything u can about ur dr(s) i love listening
🐞; name three oddly specific things you’re excited to witness in your dr.
a thunderstorm - we rarely get thunderstorms where i live, and i'm so excited to see a actual big one!!!
the stars - the night sky is wayyyy clearer there, and we can see pretty much everything
all the creatures!!! - our world is filled with things like hippogriffs and dragons and all sorts of things and i cant wait honestly
everything else below the cut because there's going to be A Lot
thank you sm for asking that because i could talk about it for YEARS
a little bit of backstory first: the dr ive been talking about is my home, and it's a bit complicated. I used to live there as an immortal with Order (my name's Chaos) until i decided "hey, ive got an amazing idea! i'll be a human and wipe all my memories! dont worry though because if everything goes to shit all my memories will come back and i'll go home :3" and then all (most) of my memories came back about 8 or so months ago, but i'm fuckn stuck here??? so. thats fun ig. but anyway i brought Order here too he's currently living in my head (i'm plural temporarily sort of) so we're here together working to get out :3
so thats my backstory!!! im a master shifter who is completely stupid lmao
anyway on to my dr!!!! my name's Chaos, and i'm immortal!! i usually look aroud 22-26 (so like early 20s) and have super fluffy black hair and gold eyes that i miss a lot. Order's blond (like a loserrr) with bluish-grey eyes and hes always mad at me for something (not really lmao he loves me) and we're complete opposites. we're both shapeshifters and i can see the future, but i choose not to most of the time because i love being surprised!!! we live in this biggggg house full of plants and old books and it always smells like pastries because i love baking lmao (Order has me bake maple bars all the time he loves them) i absolutely love all the creatures there, and i have 10+ notebooks studying them. we've also got a hugeeeee old growth forest (that i planted!) in our backyard (i guess you can't really call it a backyard, it's way too big) sometimes ill go out there and sleep because it's so comefy??? have you ever tried sleeping on a moss bed??? my room changes constantly because i cant choose what i want it to look like lmao. but it's always full of plants and books!!! (i should make a post with images from pinterest with images of what our house sorta looks like, ill do that later) we also have the beach, you can see it from the balcony in Order's room, the sun rises over it and golden hour is beautiful with the ocean (look it up its incredible) also i just realized theres no paragraph breaks in this and i am so sorry guys i dont know how to format D: but anyways!! everything like the grocery store and bakery and park and stuff are all within walking distance from our house, and me and Order would go on walks all the time and it was super amazing!! and we knew most people in our neighborhood, and they knew we were immortal because yk it's a bit hard to hide if you don't age, and it's fine, sometimes a dragon flies over the town, sometimes 2 immortals live in your neighborhood, whatever.
thats all i have for you guys rn but feel free to ask questions, because its really hard to go into detail without specific guidelines lmao. but yeah!!! ily all <3
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dogboyklug · 8 months ago
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comic one - the second one - [you are here!]
yeah
transcript under cut
...and now its been like a year since i started this comic
and i completely forgot to finish it. oops
well less forgot and more like...
got into a new fandom, had to get a new laptop AND phone, started focusing my internet activism on genocide instead of transness, got burnt out like five billion times, met a bunch of new people, started dating another person, dissociated for several months, celebrated the new year, got so terrified of the fact that might get backlash for this comic i didnt make another one, TRIED to make another one but had like five breakdowns,
and then
forgot
but uh
at least i know how to draw sam now!!
sorta
yay
So, now, with such a big pause, have things changed for the better?
Am I living my best life, finally on T? Or aT LEAST have i FINALLY gotten over ALL of my internalized transphobia (men variety)?
well uh no
in fact things are kind of
worse sometimes...
*new fandom has so much fatphobia it sucks
*there is still a group of trans women online whose sole purpose in life is to hate all trans men
*theres still a genoicde going on
i wish this comic couldve followed a "past, present, future" format where, in which, the last comic would wrap the whole thing up smoothly and i would have some sort of message of peace or hope or joy to give
an assurance that my life, and the lives of all trans people, and all people from cultures ravaged by colonisation and erasure wouldnt be for nothing, and that everything would be fine in the end
but im almost 18 and i cant say that like at all
everythings getting worse and i am not a wise old man with epic awesome knowledge and a cool beard
this comic mostly just exists as a thank you letter so
thank you
thank you to everyone who read the first two and to everyone whos reading this one and to the person who mentioned all male character options in videogames (esp in the 2010s) are ugly as sin. you are so right
maybe someday ill make a comic abt my experiences as a frisian trans man with the full knowledge of my history and a happy ending to make up for it all
(caps) Probably not though (end caps)
ok you guys get 1 happy
here's my favorite transmasc ocs of mine
tuyen sango, my agent 3, best bro
feathers chilufya-janstra, my favorite 30-year-old nerd
masa, my actual hero (she turns 3 this year!!!)
and hjalmar, i've had him for 10 minutes but i love him still. heart emoji
so uh
yeah
thanks for reading
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bambaooo · 3 months ago
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30.
I know for a fact no one is on here anymore, but doing this has been on the back of my mind for about a week or so.
But I just turned 30. My last almost 15 years of life have been recorded to some extent on here. From my 20s to now my 30s life has been fucking nuts. From going to feeling invincible, to feeling that like everyday is a new challenge of what im going to go through. I remember in like elementary school and middle school, i was like embarrassed of being on the younger end for my class. I would always lie and say that i was born in 93 instead of 94. Such a weird thing. and before i turned 21, i wasnt pressed on going downtown to the bars and clubs cause i know when my time came it would be fine. But gdamn, my 20s are gone. I cant help to reflect on the life ive lived. From college, to my first real job, first time living on my own money, relationships, covid, grad school, and to the last major things of buying a house and getting engaged. like what tf am I doing, in the back of my head im still that one kid that eats a shit ton, works out alot, and smokes hookah. But in reality im not that person anymore lol. i used to be very resistant on change but, i know its inevitable but it does still bums me out a bit. I think it bummed me out before because up until recently, ive been very deprived from my friends. I felt bad reaching out, and I felt like i was being a burden hitting them up. But like now, id rather reach out and see them rather than feel like im missing out. But ive seen more friends in the past few months than I feel like i have in the past few months combined. I know social connection is a big part of being healthy, but i didnt realize it was like that for me. But it makes sense, for almost almos the whole time i was in richmond, i was constantly around friends. but as a real adult that shit is kinda hard, gotta cross reference everyones schedules and shit. but like honestly its better than nothing, and i dont think i could do that shit for a extended amount of time lol. and life is just so fucking different know, fucking mortage and house stuff. and still trying to exercise regularly and be an adult.
i almost never want to plan anything for my birthday cause i dont like that feeling of being a burden or w/e. But it just happned to be that arvin moved back home and we got lunch the day before with matt. and that night we hung out at a hookah bar. Ive been so scared with the random health shit ive been dealing with but hookah actually calmed me down a lot for some reason. and Im trying really hard not to get back into the habit of smoking on a regular basis. after smoking for 10 years man, that shit would fuck me up. not the smoking, but feeling reliant on something. Shit addiction is fucking real. Im blessed to be able to pull myself away from shit like that, but i know in the back of my head i know that shit would feel so nice lol. Even when i was vaping, that shit didnt hit as good as a hookah lol.
but yeah life is different. getting settled in the house, gonna plan for a wedding of some sort in the near future, trying to get the house figured out. life is just fucking wild to me right now.
the 20s i definately learned a shit ton. I feel fucking old talking like that, but like its fucking true. the kids in their 20s now have like no idea how to live like we did. i hope i can get to a point where i can be good mentally and physically to live life a little bit of what i used to. I always hear that the 30s is like your 20s with more money, which makes me hella excited. but yeah, im 30 now, idk the next time ill be on here. ill probably come on here once in a while until it dies off forever. I lowkey want to go back into my shit and read some stuff, but i honestly cant bring myself to dig through that shit lol.
until the next.
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chuuyascumsock · 4 months ago
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hi pookie <33 sorry its been yearsss, lifes been a bit of bitch but im just going to be bitchier 😎
how are you doing? and also i love that you re-watched my little pony, that show RAISED me, I CRIED over Princess Celestia and Luna's reunion and the hundreds of other arcs that it had
I HATE THE NEW ONE ITS SO SODUHVODSHUCO 😔☹️
The old MLP is in my heart forever ❤️ (can you tell i was a horse girl 💀)
BUT OMG THAT BLANKET YOU MADE W LIZZY IS SO CUTE????? its so sweet 🥰🥰
i miss you and tumblr moots :(
and ive been TRYING to deal w my writing burnout 'cause i have an idea for a fic that ive been trying to write but words just aren't wording !!!!
and not to mention its been so unbearably hot where i live its actually horrific, i cant sleep at all because of the heat T-T
but on a lighter note ive been hanging out w some of my friends after we all got back from our respective trips and we're planning a little roadtrip later this month !!!!
and
i got snorb a sibling
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this is my second baby 😋 im a proud dino mother here !!!
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(this is a cry for help)
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stay sexy 😘😘❤️💐
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Hiiiii Pookie, I’m glad you sent an ask, I was getting worried about you snookums 🥺
I started watching MLP when I was like 10 because my baby brothers wanted to watch it and I liked it but after that I hadn’t seen it in years so I thought I’d get back into it. I was especially into the mlp creepypasta stuff (it was like the first official fandom I got into when I was 8 and it lasted until I was like 14 and I got a new hyperfixation which was Assassination Classroom, let me tell you— being in the Fnaf, Minecraft, Undertale, and Eddsworld fandoms in that time frame as well was wild. The fanfics and crossovers were embarrassing, y’all.)
Also, horse girl? I had to be one in middle and high school cause my mom made me take riding lessons and at least one competition lol. While I didn’t like it because I nearly broke my hip doing so, I’m still salty they sold the horse I mainly rode for two years and the new owner was a bitch and wouldn’t even let me walk past his stall because she was so possessive. Genuinely was only there to make friends with the horses, I still miss you, Cinnabar :[
And yessss, I love the blanket I made with Libby cause it’s so soft and warm which is great cause my hands and feet are naturally cold like a corpse.
I also get the burnout, I wanna write so bad and I have so many ideas but I just can’t write. I want to finish my second Chuuya hurt/comfort fic and Dazai hurt/comfort fic cause they’re almost done (my Chuuya one is 4k+ words long and the Dazai one is being a bitch and deleted half of my progress). But it’s okay because I named them appropriately so look out for fics called “I said break it down, not have a break down” and “This homeless man won’t leave so I’m spraying him down with dirty brown water” (I think you can guess which is which). So yeah :]
THE HEAT IS KILLING ME HERE TOO, IT’S SO FUCKING HOT AND HUMID AND MY GLASSES GET ALL FOGGY WHEN I LEAVE MY HOUSE FOR WORK I HATE IT 😭
Hurray for hanging out with friends!! I watched the new Deadpool and Wolverine movie with my friends this passing week and my god, Hugh Jackman is the straightest man crush I’ve ever had, he is so fine. I rarely like irl men in general (only do so with celebrities bc irl girls is where it’s at, dating boys is gross) so when I do, yk he’s got IT. God, I’d shred cheese on those abs of his.
And you got Snorb a sibling‼️ Name ‘em Sneeb, Sneeb and Snorb <3
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diagonal-queen · 1 year ago
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thungo thursday pt2
ep 6 (put it under a cut because this one is LONG)
fukuchi be like 'the agency couldn't possibly be smart enough to- oh wait nvm i forgot ranpo existed lol' like more than once and i think that is testament to the fact that RANPO BEST BOY
'have you forgotten? we're terrorists' ICONIC BEHAVIOUR
man and i complain about doing one 37 hour work week. after this one week the agency needs to take a NAP. AND THE MAFIA TOO. imagine there's like just no criminal activity or anything for like three days and everyone's like ?? but on day 4 atsushi and akutagawa are fighting to the death at the port and everyone is like 'ah. business as usual' lmaoooo
omg every time the hunting dogs song comes on i get so hyped lmao im like yESSS ACTION
'that man, that demon, the evillest most scawy man ever in the world....etc etc' and its just some guy doing the most coy babygirl pose a guy can possibly do
wait DAZAI WHAT DID YOU DO. HOW DID YOU DO IT
taneda btw deserved none of this he was just some nice old dude and then sigma fucking stabbed him lmao
dazai is like the personification of the perjury mechanic in drv3. 'go on lie. you gotta. lie now. cmon pussy you wont'
OH MY GOD CHUUYA
my god fyozai is so fucking babygirl. also wdym dazai?? if the two of you were the last ones on earth you should just have gay sex. its not that hard smh
oh no dazai falled down through the flore
OH MY GOD MYKOLA AND SIGMA
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BESTIE??
BESTIE?????
BESTIE????????????????
BESTIE??????????????????????
B
E
S
T
I
E
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
dm me if you want to receive a free 2min audio file of me laughing about this (i have a headache from laughing. my throat fucking hurts so bad. i'm pretty sure it's actually bleeding. my eyes are moist with tears. BESTIE???????)
do you even needa ask why i'm here?? ⭐️❤️☺️ *voice drops 6 octaves* i'm here to murder you 👹👹👹
and then after that fyodor was just like 'teehee he's so romantic x' like bro
dazai: *turns to the camera like he's on the office* waow
i love mykola's little laugh it's so silley
omg they're actually animating him so well. bones must've seen the reception from s4 and decided to step it up 💀
dazai and fyodor are simultaneously evil grown men and bimbo highschool girls and it's such a look. 'omg ur friends are so cute <3' 'omg right???' also mykola my beloved i want to be yours forever pls
i love how bram's acting all tough like aya can't just open the casket and leave and render him thoroughly powerless lmao
omg the official anime aya and bram sillies begin. we've been waiting for this for months folks so far so good
it was already pretty funny that aya is carrying bram like a backpack but actually seeing her running with him on her back is like a billion times funnier especially since this shit is life or death. but she just got a whole entire vampire on her back no problem sjhsksjssjhj
sigma: watashi wa shiguma me: fucking superb you funky little toddler
imagine if it was a fucking prank this whole time and mykola just injected them with a slow-working sedative or something that would be so funny. like all of this for nothing sksjksjsjks and then he just stabs fyodor or something the end. boom world save
oh ok nvm the vampires can talk just fine i guess lmao. also i genuinely cant tell if im supposed to be taking this episode seriously or not. one second people are being brutally slaughtered next moment silley little guys??? such is the way of bsd i guess
'you're a failure of a woman' my dude she is literally 10 years old she is nowhere close to being a woman shut your misogynistic ass up lmao
OKAY BECAUSE ok ok listen i was wondering what music they were gonna use for bram and when i heard the ending music i was like 'ok a little anticlimactic but i understand' and then it TRANSITIONED into the ACTUAL ENDING??? 10/10
hehe. bestie
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animg8r · 5 months ago
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Sword is back from the smith! with a brand new hilt but.... its uncovered... so today i fixed that.
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The pommel was beginning to rust from being gone at the smith for... (checks phone) six months <<; so i had to file off some of the icky things... but i cant leave it uneven soooooooooo.
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woo all nice and shiny!
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problem 2 is that my paracord i bought wasnt enough to actually cover my new handle i went with a second different colour.
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white for main hand, red for offhand! about 60/40 white to red. since my offhand sits half on the pommel.
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all wrapped up and glued! ive never used this stuff so im hoping it dries clear. i ended up throwing out the paint brush for glue. was easier to just fingerpaint it on <<
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more glue more glue! i want the cord to not unravel when its cut so i need it to basically be a single hunk of glue and string. that way when i do inevitably get smashed in the hands by a sword i can just re wrap the small section that got cut up. Really hoping it dries clear...
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second half of the project was making a new scabbard for my sword. my old one is actually real nice but, it doesnt have room for a blunt so i want a scabbard with an open bottom, or at least a fat enough bottom for a big ol rubber tip
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this is actually my first time backstitching leather, i dont have the thingy that punches holes so i used a ruler and stabbed in holes with a knife. works well enough!
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until i broke the knife...the way these snap makes me so nervous im gonna get a hunk of metal fling into my eye or something...
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I also broke a leather needle, but i have a pack of like 10 so its fine 8D this is normal i promise, my friend is also very nervous when i use sharp things, i am an adult.
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aaaaaaaand done for today (i wasnt, i made another leather section later that day...) i'll need even more leather to finish the scabbard, and then i'll have to mangle the pieces together somehow. Honestly for my first time working with leather and backstitching this was pretty easy! back stitches are simple and the material isnt too much trouble. Also the cord wrap DID dry clear, and is really nice and grippy it turned out REALLY nice. If anyones reading this all the stuff is from michaels. the wrap for the hilt is paracord, i think its 2mm (the package didnt say), 25 feet wasnt enough length so maybe for for 30 or more if you have a longer hilt like on a feder :O Links for stuff below
I had leather needles from another thing :O
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