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creepsterdreams · 1 month ago

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Touchstarved HC's + mini-scenarios: The LI's as dads/parents, gn!MC

Content warnings: in certain parts it will mention MC being pregnant but I will tag that as “pregnant!MC�� but other than that you can imagine the children are adopted :>, a bit of suggestive content(especially around Kuras’s), mention of vomit in Vere’s part, mention of manipulation in Leander’s part, overwhelming wholesomeness

Word count: 7.8k

Author’s note: I ended up loving this way more than I thought I did and I kinda want to turn this into a little mini-series so if you have any asks related to them as dads please feel free to send them! ^-^

AIS

In full honesty I can see this man having a big family, he won’t admit it, but he would love having a lot of kids

Like I’m talking 6 kids, MINIMUM

For Pregnant!MC: But even after that when you were 8 months pregnant with the 6th one he was asking when could you both “get to work” again and you lowkey had to threaten to cut his balls off(starting to think he might have a breeding kink)

But now to the babies themselves

I lean more towards girl dad!Ais heavily but I also feel like he would be an amazing dad to some little boys, so with that said, I would say he has

Twin boys as the eldest(most likely ages 8-9)

A girl(6)

Another girl(4)

And one more girl(3)

One more boy(8 months)

Yea I know, a lot of babies

He definitely used the excuse that the temple is big enough for all you when you asked how are you gonna take care of all of them

He wouldn’t tell you but he would thoroughly enjoy the times when he returns home and hears the sound of giggling and small feet running around

With his little boys he is very playful and sometimes you have to tell him to chill on the roughhousing(the boys never mind it honestly)

Like if he’s not with you, out somewhere, with the girls, or whatever else he’s with them wrestling as if his life depended on it

Meanwhile the youngest boy is just sitting there, giggling and clapping watching his dad and brothers fight

Lowkey can barley cook for shit but dw, he’s more than happy to spend god knows how much money(or steal if we’re being honest) on food from restaurants in Eridia

O m g he literally spoils his little girls to death(he spoils the boys too dw)

Yes he has limits on what he can do or buy, yes he is fully aware that he can say no, but can you resist those adorable little puppy eyes?

Everytime you send him out and they go with him, he returns with what you wanted, but at least 5 other bags with him(spoiler alert they all belonged to the girls)

Whenever you confront him for it he just looks at you and sends his most innocent smile “I know I could’ve said no sparrow, but look at those faces? How can I resist that?”

Vere sometimes visits (Visits as in randomly walks in whenever he pleases) and plays with the kiddos, often giving you and Ais enough time to leave and spend some “alone time” together in Lowtown. He pretends he’s annoyed by them but you and Ais both know he’ll die for those kids.

Honestly if anything you both expected them to be afraid of Vere but given that you have Princess as the family pet and live in the wastelands they have better things to be scared of

I’m sorry but his smoking habits do not go away even when he has kids T^T

He simply just learns to hide it better

Aka he only does it when he’s away from them or their asleep and in the case where they catch him he throws it not giving a fuck where it could’ve landed

Would most def give his kids names of japanese origin I’m sorry you cannot argue with me on this

Moving on to the serious bits

He has one huge rule that all the kiddos have to follow no matter what

“Under absolutely no circumstance do you go near the sea spring.”

Ais specifically made it a priority to have your “house” parts of the temple far from it so they would never need a reason to go there

But unfortunately these are small children we’re talking about so of course their curiosity gets the best of them

The oldest twin was wandering around one day and stumbled upon it, voice began echoing in his head, luring him closer to the deadly waters. And just as he leaned down and was about to drink the mysterious liquid, a roaring voice yelling his name ripped him away from the waters

Ais had never experienced pure terror so intense as he had then, and he never wants to feel that again(Ocedus lowkey took over for a moment when he was scolding the kiddo but he would never know that)

But moving on from the angst

One of the best dads, genuinely

He raises his boys to be strong but also knows it’s okay to have bad moments, and no one will judge you for them. But he also raises his young girls to be the same way, but he’s just a “tad” bit more protective of them.

This demon loves his big family so much and wouldn’t trade them for anything

You and Ais were both laying down in your shared bed, you cuddled up against his chest while his arm was wrapped around you. You both were enjoying some time of relaxation in the early morning before any of the kids woke up, because unfortunately you knew once one was awake, the rest will all come piling out of their shared room in due time.

After a few minutes, Ais’s face pulls into a soft smirk, sighing sarcastically before looking down at you.

“Here comes trouble.”

Whelp, shit

That’s when all of the sudden, the sound of rapid footsteps came racing, and then you and Ais were being crushed by both of your sons.

“Papa! [preferred parents name]! Get uuuppp!” The eldest yelled at the two of you.

“Alright alright you little gremlins we’re coming.” Ais says while laughing before pulling both of his sons into a headlock.

But just as you were sitting up and getting ready to stand, that’s when two of your daughters came racing, screaming for you and Ais also jumping onto the futon. You catch the both of them and let out a surprised noise, holding them close to your chest.

But finally, your oldest daughter walks in, carrying your youngest son in her arms while giggling. Ais notices the baby with her and raises his eyebrow.

“Sweetheart, what did we say about sneaking in here and taking your little brother?”

She lets out another giggle, holding her brother closer while walking to you and Ais. “But he wanted to play with us! I know he did!”

Ais then releases the two boys from his arms, quickly reaching over to grab your daughter and son and pull them onto his lap, before proceeding to tickle her.

You put down your other kids before leaning over to grab your son and coo at him as he reaches his small hands towards you.

Ais eventually stops tickling the young girl and lays down again with her in his arms, signaling over to you to lay down with them. Before you know it, you, Ais, and all of the kiddos are cuddling together while wrapped around blankets, guess whatever playing they were doing before coming here wore them out surprisingly fast.

As the kids all fell asleep once again, you and Ais remained awake for some more time. Peering up at him, you send him a small smile, basking in the comfort and warmth of the room. He looks right back at you with an expression that only can be described as loving, he leans down, pressing a soft kiss against your lips, quiet whispers of “I love you” echoing through your ears.

He truly couldn’t ask for a better way to wake up.

LEANDER

Although I can definitely see him as a family man, I feel like Leander would like to have some space between when he has kids instead of rushing to have one after the other

Getting A LOT of girl dad vibes from this man, he would love to have a little princess and you can’t tell me otherwise

I can see him with one shy little one who’s always hiding behind her dad’s leg when he’s talking to people

He’s extremely extroverted and she’s the definition of an introvert so everyone’s wondering where she got it from(most likely you)

For pregnant!MC, he treated you like a god throughout the entirety of those 9 months. Even tho he was a bit disgusted by some of your cravings, he wanted to keep you happy

“Sure sweetheart of course I can get you cookies with a side of pickle juice ^-^”

He loves that little girl to death omg

As in whatever she wants, she gets

If she wants to have a tea party with him featuring some of the bloodhounds, guess what? Grab him a tiara and a tea cup that can barely fit in his hand

Unfortunately one of the issues that came with her was now he couldn’t spend as much time at the Wet Wick as he would’ve pleased, sure most of it was still gonna be spent there but how would he explain why he had a 6 year old with him at a bar?

So that led to him eventually finding a home as close as possible to the damn place so at least he wouldn’t have to walk far(He asked the owner at first if he can actually have the spare room upstairs for all three of you and she almost banned him all together)

Loves taking her out on adventures in Lowtown and even has a little handmade bloodhound cloak made for her

I’m sorry for anyone who will find this cringe but he would unironically call her “babygirl”

I just get those kinda vibes

Literally takes at least an hour once a day to teach her a little bit about magic because she wanted to be able to conjure her own flowers

Most of her wardrobe is filled with the nicest dresses and outfits money can buy(50% of the money is what he gets from jobs and the other 50% is whatever is left over from his allowance of when he was still living with family)

Aside from her shyness, she is literally a mini him

You lost count of how many random small animals she’s brought home and begged to keep

“Honey I understand that it was hurt after falling off some boxes, but that is a soulless.”

On occasion you’ve caught her using the little bit of magic Leander taught her to make her stuffed animals walk around, but you thought the sight was so adorable you didn’t say anything about it

He has been singing her lullaby’s since she was a baby and it’s to a point where she can recall every lyric in a heartbeat

It makes him cry but he denies it everytime

Seems like the kinda guy that would name her something like “Skylar”, “Rosemary”, “Magnolia”, or “Tallulah”

Definitely something that sounds beautiful or adventurous

A little more angsty headcanons

Giving that the biggest analysis we have of his character is that his whole kindness act is a facade and that a monster hides beneath that

As she continues growing, Leander becomes increasingly more protective

Sure she has other friends and most likely people she can spend time with, but how would Leander be able to keep an eye on her if he isn’t around?

Spoiler alert, he has bloodhounds follow her around and report everything back to him

She’s out at the market with some besties getting food? Cool, he’ll pretend he didn’t already know that when she comes back home to tell him all about it

However, unfortunately, one of those bloodhounds couldn’t be careful enough and she found out

Cue an hour long argument where she’s telling him she can protect herself and doesn’t need him stalking her

Cue him saying it’s to keep her safe and that she should be lucky he isn’t keeping her in the house 24/7(whoopsie the bad side slipped out a bit)

Eventually you have to step in and tell the both of them to relax and talk when they're both calm :(

Back to the wholesomeness though

He genuinely cherishes her and always makes sure that she has whatever her heart desires

But he also teaches her to protect those who can’t protect themselves

But even after she grows into a strong fighter, at the end of the day she’ll always be his little girl

Leander was sitting at his desk, quietly filling out some paperwork after a long week of back to back jobs for the bloodhounds. He was exhausted, but there was work to be done.

But as he was busy writing out some reports, the door to the small study opened, and in walked none other than his daughter, who was holding one of her many stuffed animals close to her chest.

“...Daddy?” She called out to him in a hushed tone.

Leander quickly looked up from the paper, eyes drifting over to the small girl who was standing in the doorway. He sat the pen he was holding down and set the huge stack to the side. That all can wait, what was more important was making sure she was okay.

“Hey there baby girl, everything okay?” He stood up and walked over to her, crouching down so he was on her level.

She looked down at the floor shyly, trying to muster up the courage to continue talking. She hugged her teddy bear closer to her, hiding her face within its fur. “I can’t sleep..Can I stay with you?”

Leander’s face automatically lit up, and he shot her a wide grin. “Of course you can! Come on.”

After saying that, Leander leans over to pick the little girl up, sliding his arm underneath her body so she can hang off of his side. He then walks back over to the desk, sitting down and adjusting her so she is now resting on his lap.

“Comfortable?”

She nodded slowly, snuggling closer into his arms so her head was now resting on his chest.

Leander smiles down at her, wrapping his right arm tightly around her body so she is secure. But as Leander was about to return to his work, she spoke up yet again.

“Daddy? Can you sing that song from last night?”

Leander glanced down at her again before letting out a light chuckle, “If that’s what my princess wants.”

Leander clears his throat and sits back in the chair, the little girl grinning in happiness as she hears the sound of her father’s voice beginning to echo throughout the room.

Some time later you're wandering around the house, searching for your daughter. You wanted to check on her after putting her to bed some time ago, you were honestly beginning to feel worried as you hadn’t even heard her leave the bedroom. But then you remembered there was one place you hadn’t checked, Leander’s study.

Taking light steps down the hall, you're eventually able to slowly open the door, and the sight you're greeted with almost brings you to tears.

Leander is resting back against the chair, his arms securely wrapped around your little girl as if he’s trying to protect her from whatever might appear through the door, and head shifted to the side, facing her. Your daughter is laying across his lap with her head against his chest using it as a makeshift pillow, with her holding her teddy bear closely to her body.

You smile warmly, using your hand to cover your mouth as you walk over to the two of them. Once you reach the chair, you lean down just enough to press a soft kiss on Leander’s head, using your right hand to caress his cheek and swipe some hair out of his face. You then do the same thing to your daughter, placing a kiss on the top of her head and readjusting her a bit so she won’t potentially slip out of his arms, although judging by how tight he’s holding on, you doubt it.

After kissing them goodnight, you slowly walk towards the door again, not wanting to wake either of them. Before closing the door, you whisper a small “goodnight my loves”, and leave the two of them alone for the night.

KURAS

The question we should be asking is can this man even have children?

He’s quite literally a biblical angel who has been alive for centuries. Are we sure he’s even fertile?????

We shall find out

I feel like Kuras was very conflicted on the idea of children for a while, he’s a doctor who is constantly on the job and probably doesn’t have time for most personal pleasures

But after a time where a panicked mother brought her son to the clinic because he was hurt while playing with some friends, he was considering some things

Seeing her worry so much for him, care so much about his safety that she ran god knows how many blocks to get here? It interested him

Pregnant!MC, it honestly shocked you a few weeks later when Kuras confirmed you were in fact carrying his child. Mostly due to the fact that Kuras isn’t even remotely human

But alas, here you are

I can see Kuras as both a girl dad and a boy dad

But I can see him with a little boy that is literally a carbon copy of him

Pregnant!MC, you were very disappointed when you spent 9 months cooking him in your stomach just for him to pop out with only some of your features

But if we’re talking adoption then the young boy just straight up snatches his entire personality and his intelligence

Imagine going to the doctor’s clinic for a check up and you here him ask for some bandages but your confused since no one else is there

Just for a few seconds later a boy who looks no older than at least 10 comes into the room and hands him the bandages and leaves as if that exchange was completely normal

I get the kind of vibes that he would name him something fancy sounding. Like “Emil” or “Alaster”

Something that definitely rolls off the tongue nice

But given that your son got his intelligence, that also means he got his sass

You thought the reason your little boy was struggling to make friends his age was because his maturity level was a little too high for them, but turns out it was because he kept pulling pranks and roasting the absolute fuck out of them

So that led to you and Kuras having to sit him down and explain to make friends he had to be nice not give them a bottle of basically the equivalent of a fart bomb while lying and saying it was a “good smelling flower”

Of course he listened and was able to make some friends, but unfortunately, the pranks did not go away. He just only started doing them after he knew them for a while

He definitely fake gags whenever he sees you and Kuras being affectionate with each other

“Ewwww your basically swapping saliva”

The way he and Kuras get along is bonding over science

Sitting around the clinic for hours going through different books and papers

There have been occasions where you’ve came back and saw him passed out in Kuras’s arms because Kuras was reading a book about astronomy to him

It was so wholesome you almost cried

A bit of angst

Now we all know Kuras’s worst flaw is his lack of empathy

It’s not that he doesn’t care at all, it’s just he struggles to understand other people’s emotions

So this caused some conflict between him and his son :(

It’s been theorized that whatever Kuras’s “true form” is, is something extremely similar to a biblical angel

And with that we can guess if you had your son through biological means, that form passed to him as well (we love genetics)

There was a day where Kuras witnessed a crowd of people, adults and children all running away from a specific area. At first, he wondered if someone could’ve gotten injured, so that’s why he went straight in the opposite direction that everyone else was going. Unfortunately, someone was in fact injured, even more unfortunate, the cause of that said injury was his son. Someone had been bullying one of his friends and in a moment of anger from wanting to protect him he accidentally transformed. A day that Kuras wanted to be far from now

(If your son is adopted then you can pretend that he just got mad and beat up the other kid and felt bad about the fact that he lost his cool)

So that led to Kuras having to carry the injured boy while you carried your son that was currently bawling in your arms after he realized what happened

After treating the young lad and waiting for his parents to come and find him. Kuras brought his son to his room to talk (that he somehow had personally made. Where did he get the money from? Does he even know how to build a room???)

At first the talk did not go well. Kuras had to sit there and explain to him how his abilities work, where he got them from, and attempt to do an even better job in comforting him over the situation. And your son, still being emotional (which is understandable he just horribly injured a person without knowing), felt like Kuras didn’t care enough.

So as a result, he refused to speak to him for days. Like daayyyyssss

It wasn’t until Kuras convinced you to make his favorite dish (because remember he can’t cook for shit), and have it for dinner so then he’ll have to speak to him. Which eventually led to them making up and your son being all smiles again :>

But moving on from the sadness

Kuras wants to make sure his boy grows up being the best person he can be. Giving him all the resources he needs (practically home schooled him), teaching him all the life lessons he needs, and making sure he always cared for others

Can’t have him making the same mistakes as he did

Even though he might not show it a lot, he loves that kid more than anything, and he wouldn’t trade your little family for the world ^-^

After putting your son to bed, you and Kuras finally had some sort of alone time. With you still trying to find a way into the Senobium to find some information linked to your curse, and Kuras having patients day in and day out, you guys barely had any time with each other. So thankfully, after tonight's dinner, and some more playing, your son was out like a light much earlier than you expected.

Kuras was currently resting on top of you, his hands on each side of your head as he places gentle kisses onto your face and neck, reveling in the sound of your giggles as your own pair of hands drag through his hair.

“Getting restless are we darling?” He says teasingly.

You laugh at him again, messing up his hair and bringing him close to share a deep kiss. You feel the sensation of his tongue grazing your bottom lip. You then flip the both of you over so you're the one on top and start dragging your hand down down his chest, getting more closer to the top of his pants.

But suddenly, a quiet voice interrupted the heating atmosphere.

“.....Father? [preferred parent name]?”

At the speed of the gods themselves, you quickly jumped off of Kuras, sitting on the side of the bed, and facing your son. Kuras sat up as well, grabbing a robe so he could cover himself a bit. After that he turned towards the door again, wondering why his son was up so suddenly.

“Why are you awake little one? Is something troubling you?” He said with a concerned tone.

Your son fiddles with the ends of his pajamas for a moment, obviously a little nervous about answering the question.

“I had a bad dream, and now I can’t sleep. Can you read me a story…please?”

Kuras looks surprised for a moment, before he lets out a snicker and scoots over a bit before patting the area, signaling his son to come sit. The young boy makes his way over to the bed, climbing up onto it and sitting down in between the two of you, watching as Kuras leans over to a small table and picks up a book.

He opens it to the first page, leaning closer so your son can also see the words, and then he begins reading.

After a while, Kuras manages to get through a good amount of the book, his smooth, silk voice providing good narration for your son, luring him into another deep sleep as he rests against his chest.

Kuras himself is pulled into his own little daze, his eyes stretching across the paper as he reads every word out loud. But a small bump against his shoulder brings him back to reality. Looking over he notices you have also fallen asleep, lying down against his shoulder and softly snoring. He smiles softly before grabbing a bookmark and placing it on the book before closing it and putting it back on the table.

He then scoots even closer, leaning his own head against yours, and wrapping his arms around the both of you in a soft embrace.

His own way of promising protection, reassuring that no harm may come to either of you as long as he’s around.

VERE

How you even managed to date this man much less have children with him is a mystery within itself

For the longest period, you always believed that Vere wanted nothing to do with kids

And honestly, he himself understood why you thought that\

He’s been alive for centuries, and for most of those centuries him and small children were never a good mix

It was always either they were scared of him, or he found their never-ending hyperactivity annoying

But one day, while Vere was walking behind you (more like stalking you but you’ll never find out). He noticed that you stopped to help a little girl who was looking for her mom along the busy streets. She was crying but you managed to calm her down by buying her something sweet, and then after that you walked around, looking for her mother. You did eventually find her, and the woman thanked you profusely for finding her daughter, and you replied back saying it was no problem.

But that sight alone warmed something in Vere. Rarely ever in his years of living had he seen something so soft, so gentle and loving.

So eventually when you returned back to your home at the wet wick, Vere was already sitting on your bed waiting for you. And before you could ask, he was immediately in your face asking a question you never expected to hear from him

“How do you feel about having children, my pet?”

“......huh?”

Pregnant!MC - Cue to a few weeks later when both you and Kuras are staring at each other in complete shock when he tells you that yes, you are in fact pregnant

And Vere is just standing outside with the most smug look on his face

But annnywwaayyyy

Cut to current times and now you and Vere are holding twin baby girls

I’m sorry just like the others he gives off girl dad vibes

Even if you decided to adopt rather than go through the pregnancy, somehow Vere managed to find two fox babies, so either way, he had his fox children (Don’t ask where he found them, you don’t want to know)

Is…surprisingly an okay dad?

He’s not perfect, then again he’s not horrible, it’s a weird situation

His pet names for them could use some work but hey, it looks cute from a distance

Because “my precious little monsters”, “my little terrors”, and “my little nightmares” would not look good to others. But to Vere it's somehow perfect???

He spoils those babies to hell and back, like literally everything they own is of the top most quality

“Of course I can’t have my children caught dead in anything less. They need to look just as good as I do.”

Sometimes people avoid walking down the same street as them because they get embarrassed by the fact that literally infants have better stuff than them

Now the question is, where did you even put all of these things?

Upon getting the babies, Vere had you (ahem forced) moved out of the room in the wet wick because “I would be damned if I let that egotistical man-child be near my girls for longer than he needs to be.”

And hence, you and the babies were moved into a little town house Vere had found that had been abandoned for a while, and he refurbished it himself. And it turns out it had been close to his favorite restaurant which was nice.

But as he spoils them as much as possible, the personal care can use some work.

Feeding them? No problem. burping them? No problem (however he does hold them in a weird position so they can’t possibly vomit and get it all over his clothes, it gets the job done but still T-T). Putting them to sleep? Can take a bit because he does get a little impatient, but it works out eventually. Playing with them? An absolute pro. Changing them? Yea that’s unfortunately your job MC, he does have a sensitive nose.

Ais sometimes visits and plays with the little princesses while you and Vere go off and hang out together (and also get some “alone” time)

He definitely gives them very fancy sounding names that also definitely match.

“Luna & Lilah”, “Olivia & Sophia”, “Penelope & Poppy”, the list goes on

On top of spoiling them, he also does the thing where he pretends to understand exactly what they're saying even if it’s just babbling, but except it's in the worst way possible.

“Ababbababbasdindasnd”

“Hmmm…yes my dear I completely agree, those pants do absolutely hideous on him”

“Vere omg stop he’s looking at us-”

Unfortunately, some angst

Given Vere’s situation, there do come some complicated situations. In which it leads to Vere being 2x as protective over all of you

The Senobium never expected him to love someone, even less have children with them

So Vere really has no choice but to hide things from both parties here. With the kids, having to excuse his random disappearances as just adventures, and having to tell those damn clerics that he has no one.

Those long hours that he has to spent locked up in some dungeon only makes him feel even guiltier because he knows his excuses aren't going to last forever

But of course, his double life didn’t last forever

A day where he was finally able to return home after hours of killing people for the Senobium, instead of being greeted with you probably sitting in your shared bed while watching your two girls babble and giggle away. Instead he finds you on the ground, crying, and clutching your stomach as if you were injured. And the babies nowhere to be found

Vere rushes over, immediately disregarding any jokes he had in his head to ask you what happened.

You explain to him that some clerics had somehow found out where you lived and charged into the house, demanding to give them very personal information. When you refused to answer they attacked you and took the girls with them.

You apologized to Vere over and over again, blaming yourself for not being able to protect them better. But Vere told you it’s not your fault, it’s the fault of the ones who thought it would be smart to fuck with what’s his.

Vere of course marched up right to the place where they were keeping his kids, even before he could enter he heard the sounds of their cries, only angering him further

Now he knew he couldn’t kill the clerics, that was one of the damn enchantments they had put on the collar he’s wearing, but they never said he couldn’t injure them

When he got there, they did antagonize him. Getting on him for keeping something sooo important from them, condescendingly asking what would the Abess think if she found out he was hiding such a secret.

��But what really pissed him off was when they had the balls to insinuate that maybe they should enslave his babies too, since he was so keen on being a family man

Yea let’s just say they were all in comas by the time he was finished. He’ll deal with the Abess later, his daughters were his biggest priority right now.

He had never felt that much fear in his life as he did at that moment. He immediately grabbed the two of them and held them as close as possible for a long time, checking for any injuries. A part of him was furious at himself for not getting there sooner to do something, but he knew what was important right now was calming them down

He’ll never let something like that happen again

But moving on from the angst

Although Vere can be a bit difficult when it comes to actually caring for his kids, he still loves them nonetheless, in his own Vere way

And even though he raises them to be the best of the best, and take shit from no one, resulting in them inheriting his sassiness. They do become very sweet young ladies, which is good for you :>

Both you and Vere were sleeping in your shared room. His arms and tail wrapped around you in a tight embrace. But the quietness was broken by the sound of your youngest crying from the other room, probably feeling lonely and wanting one of you there with her. You and Vere slowly sit up from your places on the bed, filled with exhaustion and grumbling from being woken up.

But before you can get up to go comfort the little one, Vere pushes you back down so your head is resting against the pillow again. “I’ll take care of her, go back to sleep.”

You raise an eyebrow at him. “Are you sure? I know you get extra grumpy when something wakes you out of your beauty sleep.”

Vere rolls his eyes at your remark, getting up to grab one of his designer robes and throw it on before walking to the bedroom door. “You better not be awake by the time I get back.”

You playfully throw back a “yes sir” before laying back down and closing your eyes, causing him to snicker before leaving and making his way towards the nursery.

Walking in, he makes quick but quiet steps towards the crib where his baby girl was, taking note to not accidentally wake up his other daughter. (thank the gods she was a deep sleeper)

Her ears were currently pulled back against her head and her tail was pointing straight down as her tears continued rolling down her face.

Once reaching the crib, Vere picked her up and held her against his chest. “Oh my little monster, what’s bothering you hm?”

He holds her close and walks over to a rocking chair that was sitting in a corner of the room, after sitting down on it he begins slowly rocking them both and trying to hush her tears.

After a few minutes, her cries begin to calm down and turn into soft whimpers. This makes Vere show a soft smile, happy that was able to get her to settle down.

“There you go my precious one, good girl.” He keeps rocking, not wanting the possibility of the girl getting fussy again.

She giggles in response, grabbing her tail and chewing on the ends of it. Vere laughs and removes it from her mouth before grabbing her hand and playfully nibbling on it, this makes her laugh again and wriggle in his arms.

Eventually, she was able to fall asleep again, this time in her father’s arms as he watched her with nothing but love in his eyes.

MHIN

It’s honestly the same thing with Vere, how you manage to even get into something romantic with them much less have kids is truly one of the wonders of the world

And just like Vere, you always assumed Mhin would want nothing to do with kids

For multiple reasons

They were never in one place for too long, they were constantly grumpy/in a bad mood, their job was hunting for a living, not to mention their apparent curse probably made things 10x more difficult than it needed to be.

But being all honest, you noticed the empathetic look in their eyes as whenever the both of you were passing the orphanage, you can tell they felt bad for those children who had no other family to turn too, and wished they could do something about it

So with that, the both of you ended up having very long discussion about where to go from there, and what to do with both of your wishes

So that’s how you ended up with a baby boy in your arms that the women at the orphanage were very insistent on you and Mhin caring for

I apologize to anyone that wanted to see Pregnant!MC for Mhin but I always imagined them as the kind of person that preferred adoption over pregnancy T-T but I might make a separate post for how LI’s would act with Pregnant!MC :>

Of course you and Mhin did your best to make any preparations for a child, but you weren’t expecting the orphanage to find someone for you that fast

You were honestly surprised when Mhin brought you to the outskirts of Lowtown where there was a small house that looked almost abandoned that had apparently been where they called home for months

When you questioned them about it they just responded with saying they wanted to lay low so they found somewhere no one would expect them to be

Also

“I didn’t want you…or him to be around that fucker while we’re trying to keep him safe.”

Yes they were talking about Leander

They also want to keep the baby around only Kuras until they deem everyone else trustworthy(no you cannot talk them out of this)

But eventually when your able to settle down with the little guy, things feel a little more domestic

It was a tough transition for the both of you, but you managed to get through it :>

Mhin tries to stop taking less jobs and finding ways to sneak into the Senobium, but now that they have you and their son now, they are even more determined to find a way to get rid of their own curse because now their paranoia of hurting you two has doubled

And with that Mhin was afraid of getting too close for a while, leaving most of the care to you while they watched from behind

But one day after a long time of convincing, you managed to convince them to hold the little one

It was honestly a little funny watching them panic a bit while the little guy rests in their arms, it was a situation that they had never been faced with

But they eventually got the hang of it and even played with him a bit, making them smile as they watched their son giggle

After that Mhin started caring for him more, picking up whatever needed to be done whenever you were away or wanted a break

I can see Mhin wanting to name him something with russian origins, idk why but russian Mhin has been on my mind lately and I can’t get it out

Something like “Luka”, “Dimitri”, or “Lev”

Even though Kuras is the only doctor in Eridia, he is still the only doctor Mhin is willing to trust with their baby boy

Anytime there is a problem with him Mhin is immediately putting him into a wrap carrier and racing towards the clinic

Nine times out of ten he just has a small cold but Mhin panicked

They totally still try and do some cultural things that they remember from Lovent with the kiddo, even if it’s barely anything at all it’s enough to bring a smile to their face :>

He doesn’t spoil his little boy as much as the others do, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get spoiled at all

Mhin’s way of spoiling him is whenever they come across something they think he might like while out on a job, it’s in their pockets moments later

It doesn’t happen all the time, but it’s still adorable

And now some angst

Given that the biggest headcanon about their curse is that the times they can transform is almost unpredictable, this creates some issues between all of you, especially when they return home from jobs

Mhin of course has an entire protocol for whenever this happens, giving you an entire rundown for it in case they ever transform.

If it ever happens and they're outside the house, lock every point of entry and don’t let them in no matter what. But if they're ever inside the house and it happens, take your son and leave as quickly as possible and go to Kuras.

But one day, something you never expected happened one night

You were awoken to the sound of your maybe making noises that could only be described as curiosity and almost…joy?

Sitting up, what you see makes you immediately freeze in place. In the corner of the room opposite of your son’s crib, a massive, black figure sits, its huge, white eyes glow, being one of the only things visible. Somehow your automatically able to tell it’s Mhin, mostly due to the fact that you know of no other bird like creatures

You didn’t know what to do, every possible thing you could’ve done would have opened the possibility of setting…it off

So all you can do is sit there as your baby keeps giggling and them, while you and the bird just stare at each other

Eventually, you notice it began to shrink, signaling that Mhin was slowly returning. And you couldn’t be any happier for that news

But once Mhin was finally back, they were crouched down on the floor, breathing heavily and holding a hand against their neck

Your son took notice of this and began whimpering, about to cry from seeing his parent in distress

The next day your little boy was sent to Kuras for a while to check for any injuries, while you and Mhin stayed behind. Unfortunately, this started a massive argument between the two of you

Mhin angry because you both could’ve been in terrible danger and they wouldn’t have been able to live with the thought that they could’ve killed you two. And you telling them that you had no other choice but to sit and no nothing because if you attempted to run then that would’ve only made the situation worse

The argument went on for some time, both of you going back and forth for god knows how long. Eventually, it just resulted in both of you sitting in uncomfortable silence, not wanting to say anything to the other

But eventually, Mhin spoke up again, saying that their fear of hurting the two of you was stronger than anything else, and they would rather not have a family at all then live with the guilt of what would happen.

So you guys did end up making up, managing to talk things through and find a compromise :>

Moving on from the angst

Like Vere before, Even if it’s rare that Mhin would directly say “I love you” It’s always told through their actions

From willing to spend countless hours comforting their son, or trying to get him to sleep, or just playing with him, that alone tells you enough that they love him more than anything than whatever's left in this wretched world.

And they wouldn’t have it any other way ^-^

Mhin was returning home late one night after a long hunt of killing soulless. They were utterly exhausted and wanted nothing more than to pass out in your arms.

Dragging themselves through the door, they are met with the sight of you sleeping soundly in the bed, in a position giving them the idea that you were waiting for them to return. They took off their cloak and threw it onto the floor before taking off their boots and setting them next to the door.

But before they can flop down against the bed, a high pitched giggle rings through their ears. Turning around they see their baby boy standing up in his crib while hanging on to the ledges, his giggling only escalating when he notices them looking at him. Mhin walks over to the crib, leaning over to pick up the little one and bring him into their arms.

“Shhhhh…you’ll wake up your [preferred parent name].” They say as they lightly bounce the little one in their arms.

They walk over to the small playpen they made themselves and sit down in it, setting their son on their lap before grabbing a toy that has the appearance of a baby duck. The baby immediately reaches towards it while laughing, showing off his gummy smile. Mhin softly smiles, making the toy look like it’s walking towards him while making some “quacking” noises. This makes the boy giggle even more, doing his best to mimic the sounds even though he hasn’t been speaking for that long yet.

Eventually, Mhin places the toy on his lap, letting him grab onto it while wagging it around in the air. While he was doing this, Mhin removed their shirt, exposing the bandages that were covering their chest, they then threw the shirt to where their cloak is, telling themselves they’ll get it in the morning.

After about a good hour of playing with their little boy, they eventually take the toy from him, making him whimper a bit as he reaches for it again, but Mhin lightly shushing him calms him back down.

Mhin then takes him back into his arms, lifting themselves up and walking over to the bed and sitting down against it, making sure to move carefully to not wake you up.

After that, they lay down in the bed, still holding the little one close to their chest as they lean their head back against the pillow.

It takes a while but he does eventually fall asleep, resting against their chest as they wrap their arm softly around his body, and letting their free hand lay on the small of your back.

And then it was their turn to fall asleep, but this time, instead of having the regular restless slumber they usually experience, it was quiet, and peaceful for once.

Author’s note: This ended up being so much longer than I had anticipated but it was very much worth the wait and I hope you enjoy it just as much as I do ^-^

#Touchstarved #Touchstarvedgame #Touchstarved x reader #TS #Touchstarved headcanons #Leander x reader #Ais x reader #Vere x reader #Mhin x reader #Kuras x reader #This genuinely took me forever omg

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simping-on-the-daily · 5 months ago

Text

Some Kind of Angry Beaver

Summary: The Wolverine’s massacre has made you lose everything. Your friends are dead, you’ve left home, and the world’s hatred for mutants grows worse. You promise to yourself you’d have a few words to him if you meet again, and you do, at one of the shady bars where you both grieve your losses.

Notes: Reader is a mutant and was with Wolverine for a brief time, very very brief implications of sub!Logan. Not romantic anymore, and yes the title is from ERB deal with it. Worstie is a lot more sad and pathetic since this is early post!slaughter, gender neutral reader, not beta read we die like this universe’s X-Men, I wrote this in a day and it’s absolutely gonna show

Warnings: Logan killed some of Reader’s friends in his rampage, story is based on grief and death, mutant racism, Logan tries to kill himself but he comes back dw, and a whole lotta swearing

Before you met him, you had no clue what a wolverine was.

You’d barely heard of it, having skipped over it in some animal documentary to focus on more interesting animals, like sharks and alpacas. When you passed by a bar with a few cage fights, you heard the name Wolverine for the first time. When looking at the man’s body, admittedly luscious hair with canines and claws, you had assumed a wolverine was some type of dog or cat, before nailing it down to a wolf. Wolverine, wolf, they just added some more syllables to make a difference.

“It’s a weasel.” The man who you now knew was called Logan answered curtly upon your question, looking away from the bed which smelled of steamy intimacy from last night, and thus, turning away from you, who was on the other side, putting your clothes back on.

“That doesn’t seem very threatening,” You quipped back, putting your shirt on. “The fuck’s a weasel gonna do to the lucky guy?”

Logan gave a quick grunt. “They should be more worried about what I’d do to them.”

“If you can avoid their little collars, that is. Fucking bastards and their dampeners.” You said with a sarcastic sigh. The Senate was trying to make them more commonplace, and though the clapback was fierce, you were still a bit wary.

He gave a quick hmph, and that was that.

You stayed together for a few months. It was unforgettable, to say the least. Watching that man squirm under your touch was an accomplishment for the ages, and the moment you made tears come out of his eyes you did a little victory dance in your brain. You bought him dogtags and things you thought he might’ve liked, while he defended your honor in your ring, beating the shit out of anyone who dared to shittalk you.

“You shouldn’t have, sweetie,” You jokingly answered, upon noticing that his knuckles were still dripping red after passing by a beaten guy carried by his friends, making small comments about how dumb he was. You noticed some scars subtly close in, and turned away, pretending you saw nothing. “His ego can’t take another hit.”

“Can yours?” He answered, and your only response was a pinch of his cheek.

Of course, it didn’t last. Nothing bad happened, you simply just went in other directions. Logan kept hopping between different clubs with cage fights, and you settled in a small town and made a life there. You never forgot how it felt to touch him, but you’d seen him in action. Dude could do just fine.

You got a job, and got your own group of people. Majority of them were human, but like hell if that mattered. You shared good drinks of booze together and you cared for them. Brittney gave birth to a child, and god that kid was the cutest, fattest little fucker you’d ever seen. A few years had passed since you’d met Logan, and by then you were content. Your abilities were accepted, you’d gotten your own little found family, and you comfortably nested yourself in the community.

Brittney and her new fiancé, Ken were going to NYC for a vacation, and trusted the rest of you with their child. For the best, you know now.

“The X-Men are dead. You should be staying here.” Charlie said, crossing his arms to the couple. He wasn’t exaggerating, the X-Men were dead. Their mansion was ransacked and their bodies were fucked. You remember holding in the urge to puke, as the censoring on the news was done horrible, all the guts and gore visible. Jayden didn’t, you remember, running to the toilet and letting out a combination of a vomit and sob.

“We can’t just cancel. I promise, we’ll be safe.” Ken said, though it was obvious he was nervous. “That money can’t just go down the drain, and we’ve shortened it to just two days.”

“The fuck’s the point on going a vacation, then?” You spoke up, eyebrows raised. Brittney looked at me, before back to her now crying baby, probably from all the arguments.

“I have a gun for a reason.” Ken shrugged, and you and Charlie died down. You knew you weren’t gonna win.

“Just….keep Hope safe, alright?” Brittney’s query ended the conversation, as you nodded before giving her a hug. Charlie left the premises, and later you’d see him in the casino, trying to drown out the worry you felt.

You should’ve pushed more. You should’ve tied them to a fucking chair, drugged them with some sleeping pills or whatever. Anything to prevent what happened. But you can’t turn back time, that wasn’t your mutant ability, and now your friends are dead.

So many people were dead.

You spent three days in lockdown. All from some….monster, indiscriminately slaughtering everyone in a path that couldn’t be determined. New York was fucked, Brittney and Ken were fucked. You saw their names on a list of casualties. Jayden wailed for the loss, and you let out a few tears yourself. This shouldn’t have happened, this shouldn’t ever have happened.

The three days ended, but it felt a lot more like an eternity of Hell. Your town wasn’t touched, but you still saw so much blood as you left your home. Nothing changed and yet it all changed. This didn’t feel like home, not anymore.

When the news told you the culprit of this massacre, you couldn’t resist the urge this time. You puked in your toilet, tears running down your face. Your friends were dead to someone who you knew, who’s cheeks you gently pecked. The hands that you once held were used to slaughter Brittney and Ken and so many innocent people. Logan had killed your friends, had killed you in a way.

The bodies were returned, and you cremated the couple at their funeral. You still had some tears to cry, face blank as you stared at their urns. That was your second last day in that town. Everyone hated you now, your mutant powers were despised once more after Logan fucked everything up. No-one looked at you normally anymore. Their gazes were full of hatred and prejudice and pity and god you fucking despised it. With the knowledge that Charlie adopted Hope and Jayden had absolutely run out of tears, you left, wiping your face as the downpour consumed you.

You passed by, traveling across without a goal. You became closely acquainted with the train and bus, and you once more learned to hide your powers, something that you never thought you’d have to do again. Any progress people might’ve been working on towards total acceptance went down the drain, organizations quickly scrambling to make speeches about how ‘one mutant shouldn’t define an entire race’. You would’ve agreed, but the carnage was massive and you still saw dried blood on some walls from the Wolverine’s rampage is you looked closely enough.

After it rained again, you sought refuge in one of the nearby bars. It smelled of shit of booze, and you took a seat near the front.

“Whatcha want?” The bartender asked, gruff in his voice noticeable, and you thought for a second, looking at all the glasses behind him.

“Second heaviest thing you got.” He nodded, and quickly poured some beer in a glass. You had him a note before drinking.

You comfortably fell in the routine, sitting in silence, all the other conversations providing ambiance to your casual misery. Then, like a lightning strike to a tree, it just had to end.

The door opened again. You didn’t care, but when all the conversation stopped, you looked up. You retched upon seeing the fucker’s face, and moved farther away from the door until you were on the opposite end of the counter.

Logan either didn’t notice or didn’t care, sitting at the counter. “Fuck off,” The bartender almost snarled. “We don’t want ya kind here.”

Logan pulled out a few coins. “Not a paying customer?” He spoke, as if he was ignorant to all the shit he pulled just a few weeks ago.

The bartender grunted, pouring him a glass of wine that was obviously cheap and old. The mutant accepted it anyway, taking a long sip. He shouldn’t be enjoying himself, you thought with disdain, he should’ve been rotting in Hell without a drop of drink and no flames to light up a cigar.

The ambiance stopped, no-one wanting to talk while the beast was around. For some fucking reason, you didn’t move from your seat, and so you were just a few meters away from the ex who took so much from you.

After five drinks, you had enough. You got up from your seat and left some change behind as a tip. A more conscious you wouldn’t have tipped someone who was likely a mutant racist, but you weren’t really thinking. You wanted out, you wanted away from the monster, you wanted away from that bloody wolf.

You walked a few steps away from the building when Logan came approaching you. You paused in place, perhaps by the audacity of his actions.

“I’m sorry.”

Your eyes widened, but you gave a small growl, turning them narrowed again. “For what?”

“I wronged you.” You always did need observational skills to become a good tracker.

“Their names,” You shot back with a snarl, “Were Brittney and Ken, and they were heading to New York. They did nothing to you. And you still killed them.”

“I did. I’m sorry.” He repeated, as if that would make it any better.

“I don’t care if you’re sorry!” You yelled out, pointing a finger towards the other mutant as you took a step forward. “You slaughtered my friends you fucking bastard! You lost your family, big whoop, what right does that give you to make mine too, you bloody prick?!”

You had thought about this type of scenario before. You wouldn’t give him a verbal beatdown, no, you were too classy for that. You’d say one sentence that would crush his resolve and leave him astounded as you walked away, knowing that your friends were at peace. But you were drunk and angry and your family was fucked over because of this one man, and so you went on, like a lion going overkill when it finally encountered their prey.

“I wish I never fucking met you! It’d be sooooo easier if you were just some psycho rando, but I fucked you! We slept in the same bed and I kissed you and god I fucking knew you. You were one of the X-Men, you were supposed to save the world, but all you do is make things worse!” You sobbed, dropping your hand to your side as they shook.

“And it’s god’s greatest wish that you die alone and scared, just like your fucking victims, but it’s also god’s little gift that you can’t die! And you just had to in-fucking-flict it upon all of us! All you do is make things worse for everyone, you ruined everyone’s life, you ruined my life, god fucking damnit!” You put your face into your hands and sobbed. You must’ve looked so pathetic, having this breakdown on the road in front of your murderous ex.

“I should’ve tried harder.” You murmured weakly to no-one in particular. “I should’ve stopped them. Shouldn't have relented when Charlie did. Should've done more……” Tears and hands muffled your voice. “But I didn't and now they're fucking dead.”

You finally looked up, and just like you, Logan's face was covered in tears. Good, you thought. Let him suffer.

“Should've been there for them.” You didn't expect him to talk. “Should've gotten off my ass and done something. And now they're ten feet under cuz’ I didn't.”

A stray sob escaped your throat again, looking at him, covered by rain and tears and now the moon was out. “Guess we both fucked up, huh?” You tried to smile, head tilted, with it only just looking broken and fake.

“They'd all be disappointed.” Logan confirmed somberly, as he thought back to Colossus and Professor X and Scott, all too aware of their hypothetical reactions if they knew of his actions.

“The X-Men were supposed to be heroes, weren't they?” You looked up at the stars, and held a hand up like you were trying to catch them. “But you were always the best at what you did, and what you did was never heroic. You told me yourself.” Answering your own question, your hand flopped to the side again. The stars didn't feel so luminescent, not right now.

Logan gave a small grunt, trying to wipe away his tears. “I know. I'll carry it for the rest of my life. It's what I deserve.”

“It's what you deserve.”

You spoke at the same time, before you gave a fake small chuckle. “God, you're fucking horrible.” You paused for a second, letting out another pretend giggle. “Thanks for telling me what a wolverine was, Logan. Cuz’ I know that you’re the fucking worst one.”

You lunged forwards and punched him in the cheek. It hurt like hell, and Logan didn't flinch, but fuck did it feel good.

“Fuck you, Logan. I hope you rot in Hell, you bitchin’ bastard.”

He only nodded, tears still cascading down his face as you stormed away and walked away, just like you did to your home.

You found yourself sitting on a bench, still raining and still wet from your encounter. Your ass was fucking freezing. Maybe you deserved it for being such a bad friend. You wouldn't be here if you had been there for Brittney and Ken. You had a lot of tears in your body, you realized, as you sobbed once more, grieving the loss of everything you once had. God, you hated beavers.

Logan hated himself too. That should’ve made you feel better, but it didn’t. You were still just as empty and sad as you were this morning, just this time you were drenched and drunk. You looked up at the stars again, and though they were still just as dull as they were when you encountered Logan, you still gazed anyway. They were all you had left.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Logan rushed into the dump he called a home, a retch stuck in his throat as he frantically searched. Your words were repeating once more, becoming one with the fucked up chorus that was his mind, mocking him for even considering that you’d want him back. It was a passing thought that he immediately disregarded, but the voices milked it, acting as though he’d been pining over you for years.

He’d never forgotten you, you were important to him. But you moved on, and so did he, and he tried to shoot his shot with Jean. But Jean’s dead, and you weren’t, and you hated him. As you should, he didn’t blame you, he hated himself. And yet it somehow stung.

The cacophony roared with laughter at his turmoil, and he clutched his head, praying they’d get out. He couldn’t handle your voice, he couldn’t handle Jean’s voice he couldn’t handle Colossus’ voice he couldn’t handle Scott’s voice he couldn’t-

Finally, he found it. He snatched the gun that was hidden in the sofa, a desperate last resort who times like these, when they wouldn’t stop. His finger stroked the trigger almost tenderly before putting it to his head.

“You know this isn’t gonna work, right?”

“Bro forgot he has a healing factor. Did all that killing make him braindead or what?”

“You don’t deserve to die. You deserve to live with this for the rest of your life.”

He knew that. He deserved all this pain, but Logan was never the paragon of morality. He was a selfish prick, who ruined everything he touched and yet he was the last one standing. But he wanted the voices to go, he wanted them to stop, and he wanted to stop crying because God it’s just been a dam breaking on his face since you yelled at him.

He was alone, and he was scared. Just like you wanted him to be. He embraced the trigger, and felt tranquil as the surge of bullets went through his brain.

It was only serene for a few minutes, but for Logan, the worst Wolverine who killed so many innocents, who ruined any chances of the world accepting mutants, who drunk so much it got his family killed and still drunk? Even a second of that serenity was a touch of heaven that Logan didn’t deserve.

#wolverine x reader #logan howlett x reader #james howlett x reader #x men x reader #simper scribbles #worst wolverine x reader

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ghostie-luvs · 2 years ago

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HIIII

so would it be okay if you made a yandere! hero x a villain! reader? Like a hero that’s looks like an absolute angel to the public, but when he sees the reader, he just turns into the villain. In private ofc!!

AND DJDNTJDKNR ITS OKAY IF YOU DONT WANT TO DW HAVE AN AMAZING DAY YOU WONDERFUL PERSON ☆

-🎀

Yandere! Hero x Villain! Darling <3

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who debuted as a hero just after he graduated high school. He had always looked up to heroes and it was his dream to become one. He always liked the idea of saving a person and seeing the relieved faces all because of him.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who felt excited even though he was hurt while rescuing a civilian for the first time, getting them to safety and loving the “thank you’s” and smiles he received.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who feels accomplished the more he saves civilians and sends the more villains to prison, where they should be. You can imagine the surprise the night he fought a villain and did not even have the heart to do any damage to them.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who later in his debut, is known all around the country for the amount of innocent people he has saved. He is praised everywhere he walks and is always somehow there when villains seem to be lurking. The people all love him. How could they not? He’s so sweet, he saves everyone, and he’s rather good looking too!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who saved a civilian one night in the alleyways as he hears sounds of struggle, seeing the two figures as he throws his daggers, the blades pinning the culprit and into their flesh as a soft hiss leaves their lips, their eyes flickering over to his as the once trapped civilian thanks him and runs away.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who walks over to you, scanning you over as he takes in the blood trickling down your skin and oh…even under that disguise you sure are cute. He sees the way your lips form into a snarl and how you struggle against the blades, one in your side and the other trapping your suit to the wall behind you. Only a small laugh escapes him at the sight. Feisty too, huh?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who sighs as he frowns a bit, seeing the blood down your side and arm. In his sweet voice, he offers to help you out, only cocking a brow at your refusal but eventually you give in and now, here you both are, in his humble abode, where he’s stitching you up and bandaging you.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who after that, lets you go and as a consequence, sees more of you often during those nights. During these many nights together, he’s gotten to know you..he might even say that he’s gained some…feelings? That’s absurd, he’s a hero and you’re a villain! He’s dedicated his life to locking villains up. And yet..he can’t do a single thing to you.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who meets even your villain friends and..well, was invited to do what they do. With you, he’s learned so much..he’s felt more exhilarated during the nights together than when saving people. Of course, he wears a different disguise during these nights. He’s till the sweet, caring hero they all love during the day. But the night? My, he’s made a name for himself with you and your friends.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who, one night, while committing crime with you and your friends, sees your friend being just a bit more touchy while you were rolling your eyes and trying to leave the friends grasp. He didn’t say, but he felt a twinge of jealousy in his stomach as you two interacted.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who, as the night drags on, finally loses his patience, a snarl on his own lips as he ‘confronts’ the friend, trapping them to a wall as he pressed one of his blades to the person’s throat while the rest of the group walked on, and he threatened them. “Look, you may have known them longer. But you better fuck off, they’re mine. Got it?”

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who mockingly smiled as the person nodded and he retracted his blade, walking off to catch up with you, wrapping an arm around your own waist as the person is left befuddled.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ who realizes that maybe, the villain life isn’t so bad. As long as you’re by his side, that’s all that matters.

A/N: M so sorry for the long wait but I thank you for the patience!! I loved this idea and I loved how I ended it <3 I hope this was enough for you, darlin!! And also, welcome to my blog 🎀 anon! You are also a wonderful person!! In this, I’d say he’s a new yan and I’ll give him a name soon ! :) reblogs, comments, and constructive criticism (please tell me if there are any mistakes) are welcomed!!

more of my works :) Requests!!

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pinkrifle · 1 year ago

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Hello ml!<3 i was wondering if you could do yandere team stan and craig x reader platonic please! Like they see reader as a little sister!^^

hi lovely! i do not take SP requests anymore buttttf this seems really easy, so i should be able to do this !

saying this rn i’m so sorry if this is short #_# <\3 i’m sorry if i missed a character or two aswell!

only team stan right now as i can’t really think of much to do for team craig, sorry once more! D:

Stan Marsh -

a little careful not to bring you around his friends too much.. especially cartman AND COVERS UR EARS EVERYTIME ONE OF THEM SAYS A DIRTY JOKE LOL (no matter how old you are!1!1!)

would 100% go off on anyone who tries to mess with you (and Kyle would probably join him too) , ya don’t F with family, folks!

trades his lunch or snacks at lunch to give them to you!! loves seeing the look on your face when you get a snack size pack of skittles. Even if it’s super small your face always lightens up and he just laughs and feels very proud of himself after

he makes sure shelly isn’t too mean to you, let’s her rip on him instead if she gets a little aggressive with you (she wouldn’t really go that far dw <3)

Eric Cartman -

GETS YOU IN TROUBLE ALL THE TIMMEEEE

(don’t worry he always does something in return after. begrudgingly and hesitantly.) (he just feels bad)

brings you on all of his little dangerous adventures but makes sure you stay safe all the time,, if you get hurt EVER he’s SOOO dramatic. begging for a hospital!

if any of his friends (aka rest of team stan) dare to say anything to you (they don’t cuz they don’t care) he will 100% be dramatic ALLO OVER AGAIN, threatens to beat up his friends (he can’t rlly) and is nice to you for the rest of the day!!

steals cute stuff from other classmates and brings them to you, steals snacks from people and brings them to you!! probably stole some snacks from stan that he planned to give to his own little sibling

Kenny McCormick -

tones down his dirty jokes when with you, and also does not let you around his friends LMAO

loves hanging out with you, karen, and kevin! at first he was really hesitant on stuart and carol having you (like with karen) but loved you so much after your born!!

protects u FOR LIFE. is basically also your guardian angel when he’s in his mysterion costume! when your in the foster home thing(?) he’s visiting you like crazy and bringing you treats aswell. makes sure you never get beaten up in the basement by the parents

loves whenever you show him something you like. Anime? cartoons? etc? your not cringe to him at all! he likes weird shit too, trust. Watches and plays everything you show him <3

a video game MASTER! having any trouble with a boss fight? he’s got it. Cant find an item? he already has it and is gonna trade it to you!!

Kyle Broflovski -

takes care of you and Ike RELIGIOUSLY. love you two both to death!

plays dolls/action digs with you even if your in middle school or whatever (in the event he’s in HS or whatever) , he doesn’t want his little siblings to ever grow up! brings a tear to his eye.

every Hanukkah he makes sure you get the best presents and NEVER lets your presents break, always has them in pristine condition ! hates seeing you sad , it affects him more than he’d like to admit.. he also gives you his hat to wear when your a little down!

bakes and cooks with you, he’s pretty okay at cooking but if your bad it’s no problem! he’s willing to teach you the 3 dishes he knows how to make LMAO. If your better than him at cooking? EVEN BETTER, teach him! but he’ll be a little embarassed to learn stuff from his little sibling

having trouble with homework? he’s on it! he won’t let you cheat on anything, but he’ll help you and guide you to the right answer.

Never let’s people talk shit about you or make fun of you, he will fr fight his friends if they dare to do that.

heya! thanks for requesting, i haven’t been really willing to write lately but this got me off my booty!!! i really should open my tf2 and scp foundation reqs.

sorry again i couldn’t do team craig! i hope these were good enough, feel free to request this again some time if i’m ever active again! <3

#（✿ ◞◟）🫧 marj writes! ﹒#south park x reader platonic #south park x reader #south park #kyle brovlofski x reader #kyle broflovski #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh #kenny mccormick x reader #kenny mcormick x reader #kenny mccormick

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impactedfates · 1 year ago

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Hello. I was wondering if you could you write a platonic angst story where the reader is Blade's child. I was thinking that because Blade barely spends any time with the reader unless it's during one of their extremely harsh training sessions the reader decides to run away especially after one particularly rough training session where the reader was injured after they accidentally talked back and that night the reader starts packing their stuff but they accidentally left behind their late mother's pendant and Blade found it the next morning. (I hope you're okay with writing this and I wish you a good morning, afternoon or good night ☺️)

A/N: Hihi!! Dw I'm okay with writing this, thanks for the request! I hope you're having a good morning/afternoon/night as well :) This is not how I personally interpreted Blade, however to fit in with this request, I tried my best to match it up based on said request. I hope this oneshot is too your liking, I tried my best to follow the prompt of your thing. Tbh I don't like what I've written much but I hope you can enjoy it anyways.

W.C: 1389

Warnings: Blade is a bad dad, small mentions of death (Readers Mom and some mara struck soldiers), small mentions of blood, angst ending (I think?), most definitely an ooc Blade honestly...,semi-proof read as always.

((Reader is a teen in this))

Blade's sword slashed through the mara struck beings. His eyes cautiously looking everywhere to ensure he wouldn’t get surprised attacked. Soon the surrounding mara struck enemies where no more. He was able to go back home and see his love.

He called out her name, expecting a reply back. But all that filled his ears was eerily silence…he didn’t walk too far away from her did he?

He paused a bit and called out again, still no response, he was quick to turn and speed walked in the direction he saw her last. Eyes slightly widening as he spotted who he was looking for on the ground, bleeding out. The mara struck soldier who was responsible, right beside them about to deal a final blow, Blade quickly moved and slashed it, it disappeared into dust. But he had no time to celebrate his victory as he quickly crouched down and lifted up his love.

All she could do was weakly turn to him.

“I managed to kill it the first time…b-but their revival state was much stronger than I first thought…how stupid am I huh?”

She spoke, her hands quickly lifted to her mouth as she coughed, blood coming out. Blade was beyond concerned.

“I’ll…I’ll get you to a healer…just hang on tight”

He had softly said, standing up slowly, trying his best to make his way to a nearby healer he could threaten to heal her or just go back to the Stellaron Hunters Base to get her treated.

“Bladie…there’s no need…I-I don’t think I’d make it anyways…”

“Don’t say that, I just have to be quick”

He answered her quickly, shaking his head before cursing under his breath about the whereabouts of Kafka.

“Bladie…me and you both know I won’t make it…so…can you make a promise to me?”

“Sweetheart, you aren’t going too…I won’t let it happen”

Blade's voice rang out once more, but he knew she was right but he just won’t accept it. He can’t.

“Promise me you’ll take care of our kid…make them have a happy life…even if it is in this awful world…even if I’m not there…make sure they’re able to protect themselves as well so they won’t suffer the same fate as me…promise me?”

“S-stop…y-you aren’t g-going too…”

“Promise me”

Blade stood still from where he was, halting his actions. He stared at her for a bit before looking away. “I promise…”

“Dad p-please can we rest…f-for just a minute”

Your voice ran out tiredly in the training room, your hands on your knees as you attempted to catch your breath. Your eyes glance up to your father, Blade. His sword was still in hand as he looked at you. Showing no emotion like always. He slowly made his way to you, out of instinct you moved back, until your back hit a wall.

“How do you think you’ll be able to protect yourself if you cannot withstand this training?”

He spoke, his eyes narrowing a bit at your form, as he folded his arms. Your breathing slowed a bit as you looked to the ground.

“T-these training sessions…are getting too hard for me…c-can’t we for once just…go out to eat or s-something” “What do you mean by that?”

You took a deep breath in, lifting your head up, eyes meeting his.

“W-we used to go out a lot w-when mom was still here”

You start, not failing to notice the way he tightened his grip on his sword by the very mention of your mother.

“M-mom…s-she would’ve liked if I was resting…I-I don’t think she’d like it if you or I were overworking ourselves with training”

“Your mothers gone”

Blade speaks, inching forward, his arms to his side as his eyes glare at you. You knew that bringing your mother up would strike a nerve in Blade, you knew how much he loved her. But you felt like this was the only way he’d listen.

“Yes, I know b-but…she would’ve wanted us to be happy, to n-not always train too-”

“She’s gone.”

Your father repeated, his grip on the sword increasing with each word that passed through your lips. You shut your mouth for a second, breathing in. Trying to calm yourself and giving your father some time to calm himself as well. Soon your father spoke up again.

“I lost your mother…I’m not losing you just because you couldn’t protect yourself”

“You’re not even there for me anyways, why do you care!?”

“Because I promised your mother!”

“Well you’re not doing a very good job at keeping that promise are you!”

It was quick, maybe you went out of line with what you said, maybe you didn’t. But the next thing you knew was Blade's sword stabbed on the wall next to your head, but also the feeling of blood trickling down your cheek. Your hand had lifted slowly to check the cut, it wasn’t deep, but it wasn’t small either.

Blades heaving breathing filled the room, his eyes looking at the floor before slowly to your face. He slowly moved back a bit upon seeing the cut on your cheek. He hadn’t meant too…he just…snapped. He only intended to stab his sword on the wall, not to hurt you in any way but he failed anyway. He quickly moved away from you and looked to the side before speaking up in a quiet voice.

“…I’m-”

“I’m going to my room”

And now here you were, packing your bags. You had already patched up your wound, but you didn’t want to stay for any longer.

You double, triple checked you had everything before waiting until the dead of night to sneak out. You didn’t know where you’d be going but…anywhere away from your so-called father right?

And despite all your checking, you seemed to have missed the gift your mother wanted to give you before she died.

Blade couldn’t sleep, he lay in bed breathing slowly thinking about what happened…he was so concentrated on fulfilling the promise to ensure you could protect yourself that he forgot he also promised to make you happy. He knew he’d have a long way to go if he wanted to do that but…he’ll start.

The next morning comes along, and although Blade didn’t get as much sleep as he probably should’ve. He was thinking of ways to try and get your forgiveness.

Slowly he got off his bed and made his way to your room, he’ll check on you first. Hopefully you’ll be okay with listening to him.

He knocked once, twice, three times on the door. No response, the only thing was silence. He tried again.

And again.

And…again…

Each round of knocking grew louder and desperate as time went on. The same aching feeling he had in his heart when he realised his old love wasn’t responding…now it was his kid that wasn’t.

But they were just mad at him right?...That’s gotta be it.

“...I’m coming in”

He spoke, slowly opening the door to an empty room, he opened the door wider and looked around. Where were you? You’re hiding right? You gotta be hiding. He looked around.

“...[Name]...come out…this isn’t funny”

He spoke, looking around the room, hoping you’d jump out at him.

“If this is payback for what…happened…then I deserve it, but please come out”

He tried again. His eyes looked everywhere in the room, until it caught on something shining in the sunlight. He walked over, it was your mothers late pendant. His hand slowly reached for it, his thumb slowly running over the gem in the middle. He paused for a bit before clutching onto it. Making his way out of the room in silence.

Perhaps he was dumb to think you’d stick around after what happened and how he treated you. How he’d only really converse or hang out with you if it was training.

But he had hoped he would be able to fix it before you grew resentful of him…perhaps he was dumb on that part too. Somehow seeing the pendant in the empty room made him realise that not only did he lose his love, but also you. It made him finally accept that you ran away from home...from him.

And not only that, he couldn’t fulfil a part of the promise he made.

To make you have a happy life.

My friend who I asked to read through it said it was giving Endeavour vibes and I have no idea how to feel about that...maybe that's part of the reason why I don't like this fic...

#HSR #Honkai star rail #honkai starrail #HSR x you #HSR x reader #Honkai star rail x you #Honkai star rail x reader #Honkai starrail x you #honkai starrail x reader #HSR Blade #HSR Blade x reader #HSR Blade x you #platonic #platonic hsr #platonic blade x reader #platonic blade x you

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johnslittlespoon · 8 months ago

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leaving bikeriders anon here again i’m going crazy over the back and forth constant neither of them saying anything out of nervousness of it all like of COURSE it would take them forever to actually get together there would have to be an honest to god crisis a completely off-kilter situation for them to get together they’re so bad at communicating. also have not been able to get the thought of them running into each other by chance at a bar across town and even though bucky showed up with people he just ends up at a table in the corner with gale the whole night. gale jokingly asks if john is even old enough to drink which turns into a whole thing where john suddenly has to prove to gale that he CAN drink and he IS old enough and is Definitely Worthy of gale’s attention. anyways!

HIII i'm still ON one about this too dw

exactly my goddd the back and forth would be physically painful to write/read honestly lol the flirtation and the sexual tension!!

ur so right smth absolutely wild would have to happen, or one of them would have to slip up, or there'd have to be an argument where feelings are blurted out in anger/hurt, orrrr, in relation to your idea at the end which i'm going clinically insane over bee tee dubs:

john is so offended by the insinuation that he's too young to drink even if gale's joking, made worse probably by gale throwing in a kid– "you old enough to be in here, kid?" with the corner of his mouth quirking up a bit.

john puffs his chest out and tries not to let the one beer he's had slur his words, goes "'course i am" all huffy, rolls his eyes, reaches for gale's full shot glass while holding determined eye contact and tips it back without a second thought, really has to clench his fist in his lap for a second when it threatens to come right back up, not used to anything quite so harsh.

it's not gale's intention to egg him on like that, john's just bristly, a messy college kid used to bulldozing his way through life, never turning down a bet or challenge, has maybe been watching a pretty girl hang off gale's other side on top of everything and wants to prove that he can be exciting and mature too.

john ends up drinking too much, taking whatever shots the others in gale's group pass him for their entertainment until gale shuts the next person who tries down with a pointed glare, slides the shot glass away before john can reach for it, says "alright, we're cutting you off" when john whines out a complaint, leaning heavily against gale's side.

the night ends with gale helping john out of the bar because john's friends leave long before he does. he gets john out to the parking lot out front, gets him situated on the back of his motorcycle, keeps a hand on his shoulder and asks where home is, and john's like, "oh, no, can't go home like this buck, dad'll gimme a shiner" and gale's jaw clenches hard, but it's not the time to get angry.

he's at a loss, because he's not gonna bring john home to an environment he's had a faint suspicion isn't the greatest since they met (however that might have been, that's shit for me to plot out later lol) but bringing him to his house seems like a bad idea, but he's also not sure what to do and john's friends don't seem the greatest to just leave him with a borderline stranger. so what else is there to do?

"am i gonna have to tie you to me, or are you gonna hold on tight?" he asks as he climbs on the bike in front of john, and john giggles out a "y'can tie me to wh'tever y'want," filter completely gone from how sloshed he is, and gale looks to the sky and says a silent prayer because jesus fucking christ. what.

i'm like 99% certain that alcohol would be involved in a feelings confession, probably that night when it slips out from john's lips, so drunk he doesn't even realize it. nothing would happen that night, because gale's trying to be a responsible adult and he wants to make sure john's not just saying shit, but he's also quite forward, so he'd bring it up in the morning after he's brought john a water and some painkillers, and john would go so red and he'd drop his head into his hands and whisper an "oh my god" because he can't believe he's slipped up so bad.

and then yk. feelings–talk ensues. john is so mortified, he wants to die. gale is so enamoured but trying to be realistic about things. etc etc i'll flesh it all out eventually when it's time to start writing it >:)

#leaving bikeriders au #<- for other posts set in this au/future fic <3 #i already know this au is gonna be stuck in my brain for a while #i'm not gonna be able to shake it loose till i finish the dog fic and then get to writing this one lol #buck x bucky #buckbucky #johnslittlespoon asks #johnslittlespoon brainrot

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drifting-stars-mabel · 4 months ago

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Hey Mabel! I don't know how much you know about zombie/apocalypse movies (they seem like they'd be more Dipper's thing) but here's a couple tips from those sorts of things that could help you out, or at least make things easier (if Ford hasn't had you do these things yet, anyway):

•Tied up hair is a lot harder to grab than long, flowing hair. Short hair is even harder to grab, less to hold onto. Consider putting your hair in a ponytail or braid, or even getting it cut! It probably wouldn't be a happy feeling to have to cut it but you would totally rock short hair! It'd also be a lot easier to manage/take care of (coming from real life experience).

•I don't know how many humanoid creatures or things in general you've had to fight, but if you have to attack something in close range, go for the nose or eyes (at least in human anatomy they're very sensitive to damage - it doesn't take a lot to break a nose actually). Clapping someone on the ears/side of the head can also throw them off balance. Going for the liver area can also make someone double over really easily.

•When you're attacking from a ranged position, go for the knees/kneecaps first. That's a pretty solid way of stopping someone in their tracks, whether it be to stun them, just get away, or do more damage.

•If zombie media in general has taught me anything, go for the brain when possible!

•If you get stabbed by something and the thing is still stuck inside you (an arrow, a spear, anything), your first impulse is going to remove it, yank it out. DO NOT DO THAT. The object is basically acting like a plug for your body and if you remove it, you'll start bleeding a LOT and VERY QUICKLY. I'm not a medical professional by any means but from what I do know, you'll want to apply a lot of pressure to the wound (while the object is still stabbed in you because *plug*), then carefully remove the object while still applying pressure, disinfect the wound and bandage it. It goes better when you have another person there to help you out.

•I know you love knitting but I recommend learning to sew if you haven't started already. You can mend clothes and sew close injuries. Both are very helpful.

•There's a lot of symptoms regarding life-threatening things like blood loss, heat stroke, hypothermia, being drugged or poisoned. Make sure to familiarize yourself with them, both for you and Ford. (I can go into them with more detail if you want)

(Op I'm so sorry this is so long - can you tell I have hyperfixated on injuries for writing and have devoured both whump tumblr and drifting stars hcs like soup)

ooo, Thank you!! And don't worry!! I know how to sew- I just didn't have the materials before--

I'll make sure to tell Grunkle Ford this stuff just incase!!

ooc: i'm also hyperfixating dw. wish I could think up a longer response than this ong :((

#gravity falls rp #gravity falls rp blog #gravity falls roleplay #carefreemabel

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bunni-v1 · 1 year ago

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Sfw list with ace? Thankyou

🍓I got some free time FINALLY!!! I'm still incredibly busy and my plate is so full, but I can write something in my inbox! I'm so tired guys, you have no idea, but I'm pushing through as best as I can. Wish me luck please ;-;

A - Affection: Ace is not an affectionate guy, at least, not in the traditional sense. He's not gonna be caught hanging all over you, kissing you every five minutes, or absolutely begging for your attention. No, he's like violent. Not like, beating you up violent, but punching your shoulder or giving you a noogie violent. It looks like he's bullying you, but that's just how he shows he cares dw.

B - Best friend: He's such a dick I hate him. Ace is an asshole, and he knows that and is proud of it. He's gonna be mean to you and pick on you and all that fun shit. You can pick on him and be mean to him in return. He's got your back, you've got his. It's all equivalent exchange with him. However, he will defend you till his dying breath. If someone else is being mean to you, he's not gonna have it. He's a bros bro, a homie, and an irreplaceable best friend.

C - Cuddles: Contrary to what I said earlier, he does like cuddles! He's not cold-hearted, and he does enjoy being a boyfriend. He's not always wanting to cuddle, but he enjoys them whenever he's in the mood. He has to be the big spoon, though, that's his only rule. (He secretly likes the idea that he can protect you no matter if you're bigger than him or not).

D - Domestic: Settling down isn't something Ace really thinks about too hard. If he had to give an answer, yeah probably would be it. He's a college student, he's not even in his twenties yet, so thinking about settling down isn't exactly something on his to-do list just yet. On another note, when he does settle down he's pretty good at doing chores and balancing out work and home life. You're never going to feel like you have to do too much at home compared to him, but you will have to hear him complain about it while he does it.

E - Ending: Ace is probably the nicest out of everyone? Weird, I know right, but he's not as heartless as people think. If he falls out of love with you, he's just gonna be upfront about it. He's not gonna make it all about what you did wrong or what he did wrong, he's just gonna be honest. You'll likely end things on good terms and go back to being best friends shortly after.

F - Fiance(e): It's not that Ace is afraid of commitment, it's just not something he actively thinks about. That isn't to say he's not committed, he is! He's not in a relationship with you just to waste it on a one-night stand, he just won't want to think about marriage until both of you are at a more stable point in life. Like, you know, not drowning in student loan debt. He definitely brings it up after two years of being together, because he likes the idea of marriage, just not yet.

G - Gentle: He is not, as I've already mentioned, gentle. His form of affection is physical and rough, and his words will always be sharp and pointed, but he knows when to reel it in and stop. If he is actually pissing you off he stops and apologizes. Yeah, he pouts and is grumpy, but he's not going to keep harassing you.

H - Hugs: Again, he likes hugs a lot. He won't admit it, but they're probably his favorite form of affection. He's a good hugger too. He's got the big brother-type hugs, you know the all-encompassing warm ones that you. just can't get enough of.

I - I love you: It takes him a while. He just doesn't think about the fact that he needs to say it at some point. It'll come naturally when it comes, that's Ace's philosophy on it. When he doesn't finally say it, it's in such a casual setting neither of you even realize what he said.

J - Jealousy: Ace does get jealous, and it's over the most stupid shit too. He doesn't feel threatened by anyone, because why would you be with him if you weren't willing to be loyal. Nah, he gets jealous of Grim and Deuce. He wants to be the center of your attention specifically when those two are around, and he rarely gets his way so he just sits there and pouts until you give him what he wants. (He pouts for a long ass time).

K - Kisses: Kisses fluster him so bad it's so funny. He doesn't know why they make him so hot in the face, but they do and it's incredibly funny. If he had to pick a favorite place to kiss/be kissed, he'd probably say cheek kisses. Only because they're the only type that doesn't make him feel like his head is about to explode.

L - Little ones: Ace is unsurprisingly not a big fan of kids. He's not good with them, and he himself is a giant toddler so can you blame him. He's like a textbook case younger sibling, and it shows the most when he's around little kids. He doesn't know how to act appropriately, unfortunately, that makes the kids think he's super cool and cling to him.

M - Morning: If you don't get out of bed first, neither of you are getting up. If he has an eight am, you're gonna have to be the one to get him up or else he won't go. He's not a morning person, and he spends most of the morning wobbling around groggy and grumbling about how tired he is.

N - Night: Ace is also a night owl, and he really likes to stay up late doing random shit. A lot of the time both of you take a train somewhere and just wander around and talk. In other cases, you stay up late playing video games together (sometimes Deuce joins). Late nights are when you and Ace have most of your deep talks together, and you really get to see who he is underneath all those layers at night.

O - Open: It takes him a minute to start opening up to you. It's not like he has some dramatic backstory or anything, it's just another case that he doesn't think too hard about it and therefore doesn't open up until it feels right. It's during one of the late-night sessions where you're wandering around the empty streets where he just tells you a ton about him.

P - Patience: With Ace, it's a toss-up. I don't even know if you could describe what he's feeling as anger, but it's somewhere along those lines. He's constantly just irked at something, whether it's something someone said or his own responsibilities, he's got an underlying annoyance. To say it ever goes so far as anger would be stretching, and I doubt it's ever directed at you. I guess I would say he's easy to rile up but hard to actually piss off.

Q - Quizzes: Ace remembers most of the important stuff that he needs to. He knows your birthday, the important anniversaries, and your favorites and all that. However, sometimes he just forgets. You can chew him out for it because even he knows he deserves it, but it's not like he was trying to. He just blanked. He makes up for it tenfold though, grumbling the whole time.

R - Remember: Going back to the "I Love You" bullet, that has to be his favorite memory. The two of you were chilling on the couch in ramshackle, playing some game or another (he can't remember the name of it, it wasn't that fun, but you made it a blast). You'd kicked his ass in a level, and instead of pouting he was laughing and having such a good time. And he just let it slip. "I love you." Without missing a beat you said it back, smile just as wide as his.

S - Security: Ace is fully aware that you can handle your own, therefore, he doesn't really step in unless you ask him to. It's a way he shows his respect for you and your relationship. The one time he'll go above that though is if someone is insulting you and you aren't around to defend yourself. He puts that person back in their place so fast he breaks the sound barrier. He expects the same from you, of course. Equivalent exchange and such.

T - Try: At the very start, he's not doing a whole lot. It's not like he doesn't care, it's just that he's a broke college student and he wants some lighthearted fun. Once you start getting serious he puts more effort into things. It's still not extravagant dates, but things you'd expect from him. Movies, arcades, amusement parks, etc. Fun stuff, but things that you can enjoy mutually!

U - Ugly: He doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut. He'll make a nasty comment to you that'll hurt your feelings and then realize that what he said was uncool. He speaks before he thinks in a lot of cases, and it causes a whole boatload of issues for the two of you. He'll cut it eventually, it just takes a whole lot of work.

V - Vanity: He doesn't really care all that much about looks, on both himself and you. Sure, he thinks you're the most attractive person in the world, but that's not what matters to him. He isn't that shallow. He takes good care of himself, but he's not doing insane skincare routines like Vil is.

W - Whole: He wouldn't feel incomplete without you. In his mind, the two of you are separate but equal. You are just as important to him as he is to himself, but you are not the same. He misses you when you're gone, but he can function without you by his side 24/7.

X - Xtra: Ace has wanted to grow out his hair since he was in middle school. The only issue is, he has no idea what he'd do with it. He's not great at styling hair, and honestly, he doubts his would be easy to work with due to how thick and coarse it is. He gave up on the idea in high school. After meeting Jamil though he's been thinking about it a lot and asking him a lot about hair care.

Y - Yuck: Sensitivity. To an extent, he understands getting upset over things because emotions are uncontrollable and human. If you can't take his teasing or his jokes, though, it's such a turn-off for him. His love language is teasing (mutually), so he couldn't be with someone who can't take that.

Z - Zzz: He will go to sleep in one position and then wake up in another. Sleeping with his head on the pillow, he'll somehow wake up completely turned around. He's woken up on the floor, hanging off his bed, in DEUCES bed. It's so odd and no one knows how he does it cause he's so quiet while he sleeps.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #bunni's treats 🧁#x reader #ace trappola #ace trapolla x reader

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haemosexuality · 2 years ago

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im rewatching she-ra and naturally im gonna want to write about it a lot. starting by breaking down the catradora conflict origin story scene from s01e02 the sword part 2

people have said this before but the most important thing to keep in mind here is how different their understanding of whats going on is. theyre both approaching this with completely different views and so they misunderstand what the other means.

Adora: There's no time. We have to put a stop this.

Catra: What? Why?

Adora: Because this is a civilian town. Look around! These aren't insurgents. They're innocent people.

Catra: Yeah, sure. Innocent people who kidnapped a Horde officer. Now come on, let's get you back to the Fright Zone. Shadow Weaver is freaking out. [laughing] It'd be funny if she weren't such a terrible person.

so immediately theres two things i wanna say about this part, about how catra reacts to stuff. first off, something we learn about catra throughout the whole show and especially in the portal-alternative-reality, is that shes big on Pretending Nothing Is Wrong. whenever shes feeling upset or angry about something, she will start joking around and acting like shes just totally super chill guys, dw ("Ugh, whatever. It's not like I even care. I just wanna get out of this dump at some point before I dieee of boredom). Shes acting like that in this scene. Adora was missing for hours, shadow weaver was breathing down her neck and threatening her, she was already worried adora might have left at this point. she cant let adora know how worried she was tho, so shes all jokes and fast paced conversation. To Adora, tho, it just looks like catra doesnt care, like she doesnt understand the gravity of the situation.

and the other thing is that honestly? I dont think catra does care. about the town, i mean. i think catra was ready for war in a way adora never was. theyre both seeing combat for the first time here, and adora hates it. training for war is completely different than being in the battlefield, and adora couldnt handle it. face to face with it she couldnt tolerate seeing people suffering and dying, houses being burned down, a whole village destroyed. when the horde brainwashed adora into thinking they were only doing the necessary to save etheria, she completely and fully believed it, and when faced with the reality of the horde she immediately realized how wrong that was. Catra, tho, could not care less. she never believed in what the horde said, she knew full well what the horde did, so this isnt a surprise for her. and i do think shes naturally a bit sadistic, or at least growing up among the violence of the horde made her so. either way, shes seeing battle here for the first time and shes completely fine with it. doesnt even spare it all a second glance. why would she care about these people she never met if the most important thing in the world is right here in front of her? (i think even if adora hadnt left that night and went into the battlefield as a force captain, she wouldve ended up deserting. she cant stand seeing people suffer and she cant stand not saving them. shes too good, too selfless for that. catra isnt.) (also she is so ready to kill at all times. she loves violence. i once saw someone say how shadow weaver thought adora was the "cutthroat, ruthless warrior" when that was actually catra and they were totally right)

adora is also trying something futile here, she doesnt need to explain to catra that the horde is bad and hurts innocent ppl because catra has known that all her life

Adora: Catra, no. I can't go back. Not until the Horde leaves this town alone. You have to help me.

Catra: What are you saying?

Adora: I’m saying, this is wrong. They've been lying to us, manipulating us. Hordak, Shadow Weaver, all of them.

Catra: Duh! Did ya just figure that out? Manipulation is Shadow Weaver's whole thing. She's been messing with our heads since we were kids.

(the captions in the pics are slightly wrong, nvm that.) everything i said before. adora just realized all of this, while catra has always known, probably because the abuse adora suffered was more manipulation-and-brainwashing, while shadow weaver always made clear to catra that she didnt give a shit about her, so she suffered physical abuse with little attempt to convince her this was fine.

the "what are you saying?" is one of the things that show how different their perspective is. adora is talking about going against the horde and helping the town, while catra immediately gets more personal. what do you mean? are you saying that you might leave the horde? leave me?

Adora: How could you possibly be okay with that?

adora means, how could you be ok with the horde lying about its actions, and killing innocent people? how could you be ok with the horde raising us to do the same? and catra hears, how could you be ok with shadow weaver and hordak abusing us?

Catra: Because, it doesn't matter what they do. The two of us look out for each other. And soon we'll be calling the shots. Now come on, can we go home already?

catra replies: because, i love you. because you have my back and i have yours. because nothing really bad can happen as long as we have each other, remember? and soon enough, we'll be powerful enough that they cant hurt us anymore. Adora hears, because i dont care about these people dying, the only thing thats important is you and i. and anyways, soon its gonna be Us killing them, isnt that good? lets go back home to the evil murder place.

Adora: I'm not going home, Catra. I can't. Not after everything I've seen. Come with me. You don't have to go back there. We can fix this.

adora says: im starting to realize now how wrong i was about everything. we're not the good guys, and i cant stand for that. i cant stand around and watch people get hurt. i cant stand around and watch you get hurt. lets leave, together, and have a better life, please. lets do the right thing.

Catra: Are you kidding? You've known these people for, what, a couple of hours? And now you're just gonna throw everything away for them?

catra hears, shes willing to leave me. after everything i did for her, all that i took, all of these years of us being together, she would still leave me. she would break our promise. she would leave me behind.

and then she straight up electrocutes adora. ok

she says it was a reflex, but i dont know if i believe her. i dont think she likes hurting adora (not physically. not by this point, anyways), but i do think that shes the type to lash out when upset and immediately regret it, then feel guily about it. which just makes her more upset. :(

Catra: Oh, man. That was a lot stronger than I thought. Are you okay?

Adora: Why are you doing this?

Catra: Because you left me! And if I don't bring you back, Shadow Weaver’s gonna have my head. So, enough with your weird little identity crisis and let's go home already. Or do I need to zap you again?

thats the last time they talk. adora gets teleported away by glimmer, and when they see each other again, its clear that they both made their choice.

the moment adora showed catra she was willing to leave her, there was no coming back for them. because catra would never get over that. she'd spend all her life in that hellscape, putting up with abuse and bullying and probably so much more we dont get to see, because of the promise adora made her. and, in her eyes, adora was ready to leave her on the first opportunity that came up. that hurt. that broke her. and that released something really ugly inside of her.

cue in 2,5 years of homoerotic rivalry and trauma. ok post over if you read this i hope you liked it <3 bye

#autism won today this took me 1 hour to write #she ra #catra #character analysis #ig??#edit while reading old spop posts by other ppl i realized my mind might have plagiarized this from a post i read several years ago. my bad #it wasnt a conscious decision

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gothic-thoughts · 1 year ago

Text

Smart Choices

Levi Ackerman x Black Fem Reader Angst

MafiaAU, MeetUgly

CW: shooting, threatening, kidnapping?, laid back Levi, Reader speaks Japanese (dw I gotchu😉)

Word Count: 1430 (give or take)

My guards manhandle the little bastard into my office and to her knees before my desk, leaving her helpless with nothing but a glare in my direction. She struggled against the tape around her wrists and I walked around my desk to lean against the side opposite of my chair, looking down on her with slight amusement.

"Took you long enough~" I hum, squatting in front of her.

"Careful sir, she's lively."

"Oh, I know. I'm quite the fan of liveliness."

She suddenly breaks through the poorly fastened restraints, jumps up, and runs for the door. Before her fingers could even grace the metal of the handle, Silas grabbed her, making her turn around but in the same second, my worker was shot with his own gun. She seems to be in shock, the gun shaking in her hand as he slumps to the floor, holding his wound.

Welp, not my fault he left the safety off, basic gun safety. Maybe Mark will do better. He stepped up from behind and smacked the gun out of her hand before tightly grabbing her by the neck watching sadistically as she scratched at his wrists and forearms.

"No... no..."

"Guess I should've warned you not to run from me. Although, that's usually a given."

"Don't...let him kill me." She choked out making me raise my eyebrows, "You...kill me. N-not... some low... life."

"Hm, interesting." I snap my fingers, "You heard the lady."

He releases her and drops his hand at the same time, making her buckle to the floor as air rushes back into her lungs with loud coughs and gasps. Mark grabs the back of her shirt and drags her back to my feet. I crouch down and cup her jaw, forcing her to look at me to watch the fear in her soul, but it wavers. She's not scared, or at the very least she's ready to die.

"Heh..." I push away her jaw, "Such a pretty thing, but such sticky fingers."

"If you're gonna kill me then do it."

"Eager too. Mark."

"But sir--"

I pull out my gun, "Leave in a hurry or a bag. Your choice."

She remains silent as my dumbass of a goon rushes out of my sight, closing the door behind him. I continue to observe her, analyzing everything from the disheveled clothes to the bold look in her eye. What am I going to do with you?

"Anyway, you don't seem scared of me," I rest my gun on my desk, "Hell, I'd go as far as to say you're ready to die, woman."

She raises her eyebrow, "Woman?" That was hot.

"Well I don't know your name and you seem stubborn enough not to tell me so I'm gonna call you what you are; a woman."

"Hmph."

"And I'm guessing you know what my name is."

"Levi." She rolled her eyes, "Everyone around here knows your name; I meant your real name."

"That is my real name. You know who I am and still stole from me in my own club?"

Her boldness finally fizzled out somehow when she looked to the closet door to avoid my gaze. Finally, I was starting to think I lost my edge.

"And that is my real name."

"And if I don't?"

"Humor me. Now answer my question; you said you wanted me to kill you; what are you escaping?"

"Nothing. And even if I was, I wouldn't come to you if all people."

A loud and sarcastic laugh erupted from my chest, "You put your life on the line to rob me, that's desperate. You want, no, you need something, whether you like it or not."

"Shouldn't I be asking you that since you're pressing me for a couple hundred dollars, Mr. I-have-and-own-everything?"

"You killed two of my men before being strangled back to your place so I want to know what would you need that much money for that badly."

She stayed silent and hung her head knowing I wouldn't let her go without a response. She probably even thinks I'll kill her if I don't get it. She looks at me with tears swelling around those beautiful eyes.

"My ex owes a loan shark."

"Okay? And?"

"He's only my ex cuz I found out he put his contract in my name."

My eyebrows furrow and my jaw drops. How dare he? After I deal with her shark I will deal with him personally. Until then, she's gotta stay with me, where else will she go? I'd have to give her money to pay the shark and her rent anyway. Fine. I stand up straight.

"Get up."

"You're letting me.... go?" She asks standing slowly.

"Where is he now?"

"Hopefully dead." She growls, "We had a huge fight and I kicked his bitch ass out."

"Wonderful, very proud, but I meant the loan shark."

"I don't know, I don't keep tabs on her unless she calls looking for her payment."

"Ah, a woman shark. That narrows it down." I watch as she curses herself in her head, "What's her name?"

"I don't need you to--"

"You're welcome to stay with me as well."

"I am not living with you."

"I live in a mansion and I run a yakuza. You'll barely see me unless you really want to." I wink, "Name please."

"I don't need you to protect me!"

"I'm sure you don't because you're oh so very dangerous." I roll my eyes, "But if I don't, you'll either end up in deeper debt with a hospital bill or found at the bottom of a river. So, again, loan shark's name, from the top."

She sighs heavily, "Ymir."

"Ah, haven't heard that name in a while. I'll deal with her myself as well then."

I turn to walk back to my chair when she grabs my arm firmly and pulls me back to her. I raised my eyebrow and ogled her a little, acknowledging how quick she stood up and grabbed me. Not even a little fear. I mean she did steal from me already, but it's kinda hot.

"Tell me why you care so much."

"Let's just say that I like you, how's that?"

"Bullshit."

"Too bad you don't have much of a choice. Now, would you like to go?"

"Go wh--?"

"My house, genius."

"I never agreed to--"

"Either I take you in my sports car or a guard can take you in a van. Your choice."

"Are you serious?"

"Totemo(Very)."

She scoffs before storming over to the door and standing next to it. She takes my keys off the wall and throws them at me to which I catch it and smirk at her once more before walking over and opening the door for her.

"Good choice."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the car, she's quiet and looking out the window at every building, street lamp, and illuminated sign we zoom past at 70 mph. My gloves squeak slightly as I realigned my hands on the wheel to turn down a darkened street, catching her tensing up in my peripheral vision.

"Relax sunshine, we're almost there."

"Not really something you wanna hear from a yakuza boss in the dead of night, so thanks for that."

"It's not my fault we found you at night. Oh, I never caught your name woman."

"Stop calling me that."

"Noted, you like sunshine better."

"What!? I never said--"

"You got a name or not?"

She paused, sighing heavily. "It's (Y/n)."

That is...really nice actually. "Wasn't expecting that. You're a foreigner or is that your--?"

"Sore wa watashino onamae desu(it's my name)."

"Alright, alright. I'll dead this convo right there cuz you still seem like you hate me besides me helping you out."

"Oh please, there's always a catch. There's something you're not telling me. You probably want to sleep with me in return."

"Well, of course I do, you're hot. But I don't want to in return for anything. Maybe I just want the feeling of waking up next to someone pretty. Hopefully more than once."

She gasps and quickly looks out her window completely silent while I park in my garage.

"Must Yakuza members be so outta pocket?"

"Only thing that keeps us respected. Now come on, I'll introduce you to the butler and get you to your room."

"My room?"

"Oi, don't get sappy on me, sunshine. It's just a guest room."

Bold of her to assume because she didn't wanna see me that I didn't want to see her, so she'll be sleeping in the guest room closest to my bedroom.

#levi ackerman x black reader #x black fem reader #x black reader #black reader #black writers #levi aot x reader #shingeki no kyojin #aot angst #aot x reader #attack on titan x black reader #attack on titan x female reader #attack on titan x reader #levi x reader #levi x black reader #levi x fem!reader

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fiber-optic-alligator · 7 months ago

Note

(Not a request dw)

I read your Knock Out fic, and fghjklkdsdyuwsfs Why is he hot?!?! Hot And Scary?!?!?! I am short circuiting!!! His vanity makes me wanna punch him, and I LOVE when he gets to be scary and threatening! The possessive under current to his banter with the human he dragged out into the middle of nowhere is Everything btw!

All that to say, I love your portrayal of Knock Out, and I will be rereading that fic again.

NEHDJRNFJF THANK YOU!!! Knockout is one of my top favorite Transformers purely because of how big of an asshole he is. He’s so unlike the other Decepticons in the way that he doesn’t look or feel like he should be a Decepticon at first. He’s flashy, he’s handsome, and he talks way too much. I think these qualities are what made me feel at first that he isn’t as bad as his comrades because he acts in such a humanized way. But upon actually getting to know him, you realize that he’s just as crazy as the rest of the Decepticons, if not worse. Knockout is scary! He has so much potential to be one of the most terrifying Decepticons because of just how big of an asshole he is. But something I also like is that he’s not all evil! Did he kidnap you and drag you out into the middle of nowhere like you said? Yes. Does he enjoy hunting you for sport and threatening to eat you(which he does do at the end of the fic btw)? Yes. But he won’t hurt you! He might poke and prod you a bit, maybe strap you down to a gurney and study you, but he’s not going to kill you. You’re his human now! There’s no point in getting rid of such an adorable little thing like yourself!

You can’t escape him. Don’t even try. He’s stronger than you. He’s faster than you. He will find you. Don’t make your life harder than it has to be.

Thank you for the find words! I’m so happy my portrayal of him is accurate to his personality! That’s what I always go for when I write, and it’s relieving to know I’m doing it correctly lol!

#gator answers #knockout x reader #transformers prime #vore mention

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persephone11110 · 1 year ago

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It’s Hurts Me So Much

Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

Warnings: low self esteem issues, negative self-talk, arguments,angst, fluff, hurt/comfort,finding,protective/fluffy bradley bradshaw, reader and bradley verbally hurt eachother, Bradley isn’t innocent, dw angel and bradley are till death do us part, mention of past abuse, mention of drink driving , Bradley’s a dick for a bit, happy endings tho

Summary: It was your fault, you knew one day Bradley would get tired of your insecurities. And that one day is now— at this point you couldn’t blame him. He’s been doing this for five years— you guessed today was his breaking point.

reader nickname is Angel

A/N : this is set after the uranium mission preferably after Hold Me Baby

- apart of FALLEN ANGEL Series

******

One thing for certain the fight ended the minute you flinched from Bradley’s touch.

******

It was textbook knowledge to know that every marriage isn’t perfect and any couple who said otherwise was just spewing bullshit. You knew that—your pretty sure Bradley knew that too but it didn’t stop your brain from forming insecure thoughts about your relationship.

Are you too clingy?

Were your insecurities too much for him to handle?

Was he tired of you?, “I won’t be surprised Y/n, Bradley can only love his broken angel for so long before he gives into urge and leaves you”.

The insecure part of your brain told you relentlessly.“How can he love someone so broken and useless like you?”.

“I don’t know”. He said again. “I don’t know Y/n”.

“I’m sorry Bradley, I just wanted to spend time with love of my life for a change!”. tears welled in your eyes. “You’ve been spending more time with the daggers than you have with me”.

“I’m tired Y/n!” he yelled back at you.“I’m so fucking tired of this Y/n”.

His fist clenched at his sides.“Please, please dont hit me” you quietly thought.

Your standing infront of him with tears in your eyes.

You couldn’t help but cry, why is he being so mean to you?

“I come home from training all day, taking orders all day long— and I have to come home to you.. to a woman who can’t think without a few insecurities taking over her daily life”. He barked at you.

How could he throw that in my face?

You shrink back. “Well I’m so sorry you married me—”. You were doing a piss job at keeping the tears from falling down your face— your pretty sure your ending this argument with mascara streaks.

“So am I Y/n” he interrupted. “It’s so sick and tiring listening to you talk about your insecurities every day”.

“Ok, Lieutenant Bradshaw you win this time, I keep forgetting you care more about your job than me”. Your voice cracking.“I guess our vows mean nothing to y-you right?”.

“Y/n!” Bradley moved towards you.

And out of reflex you step back with your hands infront of your face.

“Please don’t hit me Bradley” those words were meant to be kept inside your head— not outside your mouth, left lingering in the air.

Suddenly his anger is gone, fading away into the abyss the moment he realized he caused you distress.

“Angel I—”.

My actions triggered her flight or fight response.

“I’m sorry” you murmured.

“Y/n please talk to me, i’m so sorry”, Bradley sits down on the bed behind him- trying make himself less threatening.

“It’s okay Bradley— It’s fine, I’m fine” you attempt to sound confident in your answer even throwing on a fake smile to prove it.

He knew you to well. “What happened Angel?” Bradley holds his hand out— you take it with tears in your eyes.

Your still standing, he’s still on the bed.

He’s showing you he’s not a threat.

“No it isn’t Angel”. He starts and Bradley has to stop a river of tears from making his face wet. “If my parents were still alive they’d whoop my ass from here to bum fuck nowhere”.

His jaw clenches“I made a promise to you and I broke it”.

You breathe—taking a deep breathe.“I’m really fine Bradley”. You insisted— you really don’t walk down memory lane.

“Talk to me Y/n, I’m not going to bed until we resolve this—talk about this”.

Like I said he knows me to well. If we go bed like this I’ll spend the entire night awake thinking about how all of this is my fault.

Mister Know it all.

He’s not letting this go.

You step away from him— turning around facing the doorway. “I can’t look at him and say it”.

You don’t attempt to stop the tears this time.

“My ex used to hit me alot, whenever we got into arguments they would also end with me in the shower washing my blood off of me… I didn’t leave him until he got in trouble for drunk driving”.

You told him, confessing about about a part of your life that kept in the back of your head. You gave up on not crying.

“Y/n thats never happening again” Bradley swore to you, “C’mere”. he whispers to you.

“I know you wouldn’t”. Your still facing the doorway, unable to bring yourself to him.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you Angel” he grabs your hands, gently pulling you to him. “Me being tired of work is no excuse for the way I acted”.

“I forgive you Bradley” you look up at him with a small smile on your face. “But you have to clean up Orbit’s dog shit for a week”.

“Oh really?” he pouting at you with a sly smile present on his face.

“Really Mr. Bradshaw”. pinching his sides softly. “Pretty sure Orbit took a shit right next to your car”. you giggle at Bradley’s horrifed facial expression.

“Of course he did” Bradley huffed. “I love you Mrs. Bradshaw”. He reaches down giving you a firm kiss on the top of your head.

“I love you too Mr. Bradshaw, but you still have clean up dog shit”. you smiled— holding his hand in yours.

“Damn it, well I tried”.

#top gun #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x reader

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clownmoontoon · 5 months ago

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RAAAAHHH HELLO ITS BEEN A MINUTE!!! \OUO/

YOUR FAVORITE CLOWN IS BACK IN BUSINESS ive been quiet a while, a LOTS been going on in my personal life that brought my social medias to a complete (and unfortunate ToT) standstill til now!

i rlly wanna talk about it, its been honestly life changing and for safety i need to add some warnings:

cw for abuse both physical and emotional, and suicidal thoughts/ideation (dw im ok and not suicidal! i used to be and i finally have real context as to why)

ANYWAYS LETS TALK ABOUT IT

i got the opportunity to see a therapist for free for the first time since i was a kid and it was IMMENSELY eye opening.

SOME CONTEXT: ive lived with just my mother since i was a teenager as i tried to "make it" as an artist. ive had my ups and downs w this career goal and have been heavy in the midst of a very big Down period. entirely brought on by how sick i was at the start of the year to june (infected lymph nodes, pneumonia, 2 pounds of tumors in my uterus that required the removal of the organ entirely etc, i may have a weak immune system im realizing sdlkjd) which resulted in me having very little energy to create and/or post content. by july i needed to basically start over. which i was excited to do! i WANTED to get back to work and i was even excited for art fight! ;u;

aaaand in july is when my mom thought would be a good time to threaten to kick me out unless i found money to give her or got a "real" job. this came as an extreme and horrifying shock as i had just asked her the month before to "believe in me just a little longer" as i finally felt i realized what id been doing wrong all these years before and felt strongly i could succeed before the end of the year, she not only emphatically agreed but even said i didnt need such a time limit and she definitely didnt mind supporting me til i reached my dream lol i couldnt even do anything until july bc i was busy recovering from major surgery, coming home with tape on my stomach to heal the incision that hadnt fully closed yet

ive wanted to see a therapist for ages bc im Full O' Trauma and i knew it would help. The way this worked was basically like getting a free trial, i got six days of therapy (to be spread out as far as i liked) thru zoom.

i used the visits more for getting advice on how to reach my goals thru mental blocks and exhaustion bc ultimately i felt like 6 days wasnt enough time to get into trauma stuff and i really just wanted to get my career off the ground again, hopefully permanently.

i had vented a tiny bit about my mom and by the final visit w my therapist i decided to forgo the "how to better reach my goals" questions and ask if she had advice on how to handle someone like my mother, who i had to live with and rely on and who would often say something cruel whenever the mood struck. as i told her about my situation she stops me and asks

"do you hear yourself? bc i hear you"

and im suddenly so scared shes going to tell me the same, "get a real job" "stop acting so selfish" etc

instead she says, "this is abuse, youre literally describing an abusive relationship"

i was in complete shock

i even asked her how could i be the one being abused when i was the one using the resources and she compared it to a person getting married to someone rich and that rich person treating them like theyre worthless for not also making money.

it shook me to my core especially bc my mom loved calling me an abuser and comparing me to her abusive ex husbands (one of which used to abuse her physically, punch her/beat her etc) and saying im just like them

for the record ive never laid a hand on her, she would say these things whenever the mood struck, often out of nowhere

once bc i told her i couldnt read her mind and didnt know what she wanted lol wild

ANYWAY after this conversation i started looking back on my life and realizing why ive always felt so worthless, why i thought until my early 20's that suicide would be the best option for everyone. i was so exhausted from chasing this dream and feeling like such a worthless burden, my mother would get so angry with me for just existing and i felt like she would be so much happier if i were out of the picture, my sisters (both a decade older and living w their own families) calling me a leech and selfish for "using" our mother etc

any time i would stand up for myself, kindly and meekly as i could my mother would tell me how she wanted to punch my mouth, slap my face etc for years i thought she'd eventually fly into such a rage one day that she'd kill me and... i honestly didnt really mind the thought once while in high school my mom picked me up for lunch and offered to pay for a prom dress. i told her that it was ok, i knew she was struggling w money rn and i didnt really wanna go to prom anyway she flew into such a rage she pulled over on the highway just to pull my hair and beat me, and then dropped me back at school to finish my day lol

realizing that all of that IS NOT OK OR A NORMAL WAY TO FEEL OR BE TREATED AND I DEFINITELY DIDNT DESERVE ANY OF THAT was extremely eye opening

i told my best friends what my therapist had said and they were both like YEAH... DID YOU NOT KNOW YOU HAD AN ABUSIVE MOTHER??

apparently it was very obvious ^^; my friends were shocked to find that i thought everything was my fault, my therapist even used the term "gaslighting narcissist" to describe her which was WILDLY VALIDATING for me lmao

sitting w all these thoughts whirling around my head my mom texts me suddenly and tells me to ask my sisters for money (13 hundred dollars lol) bc she needs it for "bills"

i didnt want to do that at all she told me to "use my big words" to convince them and not to say it was her idea, but instead to act like i was asking bc i wanted to

it felt gross and made my skin crawl and honestly didnt even make sense bc WHY would i need that money so i asked but let my sisters know it was my mom asking and said she prob felt embarrassed to ask, while telling my mom that i asked in the way she wanted

my oldest sister makes good money and has helped our mom w money in the past. she texted me back asking why our mom needed money and why 1300 and i told her honestly i didnt know, i asked my mom what to say and she said to tell her she had an itemized list but she left it at work and couldnt remember what was on it lol

my sister told me to tell our mom that she couldnt help rn, so i did and my mom encouraged me to push harder to my other sister

suddenly the sister i had been talking to texts me and says that our mom left her a voicemail saying she doesnt know WHY i would ask for money, must be bc she threatened to kick me out bc i never help her with money :,( which was WILD bc any time i had money my mom would get most if not all of it, i havent been able to save money since ... ever tbqh, even when i tried my mom would successfully guilt every dollar from me letting me know i didnt deserve to save a penny after all shes done for me aaAA

ANYWAY i was so angry and hurt that my mom would just throw me under the bus i told my sister i had proof i wasnt lying (bc she was already inclined to believe our mother since they both considered me a leech to start with) and sent her screenshots of my texts

she was shocked and hurt too i decided to tell her about my therapy and how my therapist had called our mom an abuser and she answered that she understands more than ill ever know... which is very sad hjghfgf

we havent really talked more since and i deleted my texts to the other sister, more likely than not my mom sent her a similar voicemail

im very tired

i want to get out of here, im finally seeing this relationship for what its been for years and years, even back to when i was a little kid! i didnt know about suicide but id dream of being an animal in the wild bc i felt like if i were just out of the picture everyone at home would be less angry

its something that enrages me now tbqh ive tried all my life to be as little of a burden as possible and now im ready to be a problem LMAO :o)

the long and short of it is that i will be posting art sales and opening my patreon FINALLY to try and save up funds to get out of here ive also gotten a part time job on weekends for a little cushion tho some of that money will inevitably go to my mother, unfortunately

she doesnt know about the money i make online :o)

my family has constantly called me selfish, entitled and spoiled for just asking for common decency and to be treated like a person, theyve dehumanized me to the point that my greatest coping mechanism was creating a creature sona that isnt human but a monstrous equivalent lol AND I LOVE THEM IM EMBRACING CREATURE LETS FUCKIN GO

i know this has been long and if youve made it to the end i love u and im so thankful for your support!! ;u;

FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT!! i want to come back full force, i havent stopped drawing at all, just havent had the energy to do much til now

my therapist even pointed out that i probably WOULDVE had at least moderate steady success by now if it werent for my mom's constant abuse

OH ALSO I NOW HAVE FOUR CATS LMAO a stray i had been giving water to and keeping safe from weather things (extreme heat, extreme cold etc) had her kittens here! and my mom gave me the ok to keep them all ;u; (and then ofc rescinded that but thats hardly a surprise now lol) and man, having kids cats sure changes your perspective on what u want and feel like you deserve! I NEED TO DO WELL BC THESE KITTIES DEPEND ON ME AND I LOVE THEM QVQ <3<3

SO YEAH IM BACK BABY IM GETTING THE HELL OUTTA HERE ASAP AND CONCENTRATING ON MY WELL BEING AND MENTAL HEALTH!! 😤🔥

#clown honks #MY SELFISH ERA BEGINS NOW BABIIIEEE <3<3 #literally as i posted this my mom texted me asking for money looool i cant

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