#no i dont. thats bad. i dont want them to die.
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npdkondraki · 1 day ago
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hihihi it’s me again ^_^ can i get a basic rundown/explanation of theresa and sam i would like to know more about them 🙏
(also funny story, our first rewrite was also named moore)
oh god oh fuck . this got so long . stelly i am so sorry you activated my autism trap card. enjoy the uh . multi-paragraph infodump.
ok FIRST OFF. basically the very very very basic lore rundown vis a vis What The Hell Is Their Issue is that essentially theyre both semi-hosts to a fucked up fungus* (*think of cordyceps fungi if u want a similar example ^_^) thats using their bodies to keep itself alive.
in moore's case it primarily resides in his throat & mouth* (*hence the fucked up hoarse & wavery voice + stutter) & in theresa's case it primarily resides in her heart* (*hence the fact she essentially just. cannot die. it just refuses to let her heart stop beating. lol. sucks to be her). moore's "healing" is essentially speeding up the healing process but sacrificing pieces of himself to do so, meanwhile he recovers at the same rate a normal human would with those injuries. the entire process is just . incredibly painful and draining for him. sucks to be that guy Lol Lmfao Even.
ok hope you got that. NOW onto their . like. normal actual dynamics i promise this is Far easier to explain.
moore works primarily on site as a sign language interpreter, and he'll pretty much work on anything he can have access to. the man loves information and its basically enrichment for him to be allowed to translate things. he also doubles as an off site medic, traveling primarily to areas where medical help isn't able to be received quick as a first resort health system so they don't use up their medical resources as quick. really the only reason they even have him on medical calls is because he was a med student who just . never went into nursing after graduation. worlds most traumatized 42 year old man who has not socially progressed past the age of 10. He Sucks Bad. its great
THERESA, on the other hand, is just. worlds worst interviewer. she works primarily with the more "violent" or typically dangerous humanoid scps doing interviews which . usually ends in her getting her ass kicked or being dragged out of the room before anything actually gets physical (really, its just because the foundation doesnt want to spend more money on fixing her messes than they have to). her main goal is pretty much to see how much they can take before it turns to violence. theresa takes primary control over anything relating to moore with the justification that he doesn't "truly understand what he's getting into", so long as she has permission from the higher ups.
theres just So Much happening in the background in their relationship honestly like. brief examples include theresa purposefully keeping him sheltered and insisting he not socialize with anyone as a way to keep him under her thumb, the fact moore hates her but literally wouldnt know who he is without her and also thats his sister still and he cant just Leave Her, and also just the fact alone that she, even within foundation walls, has found a way to isolate him further and keep him truly controlled. also like . dont even get me started on theresa purposefully injuring herself so moore will heal her so she has to take care of him and just manipulate him further. endless spiral. they suck so fucking much. my constant go-to is just "cain & abel if they sucked shit and were awful for eachother". but that would take Forever to properly explain so i will not even try to. anyways.
fuckignff. yeah thats it. thats the most basic summary i can nail down. thumbs up.
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flowers-that-sing · 2 years ago
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how to cure the sudden onset of horrible and inexplicable rage
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just-null · 1 month ago
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Yknow that pic where that drunk lady kissed lipstick marks all over her cat? All I can imagine is doing this to the clones each time I get home
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POINTS AT MY PET AU
[the pic in question!]
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#null rot#cloaked cult member#kny#kimetsu no yaiba#null kny pet au#demon slayer#yandere kimetsu no yaiba#yandere demon slayer#yandere kny#yandere hantengu#Hantengu#hantengu clones#sekido#karaku#urogi#aizetsu#can you tell whos the more annoying of the guys#CATS. AN AU WHERE THEYRE CATS UNDER YOUR CARE AND THEY CARE ABT YOU A BIT TOO MUCH.#ALSO YES THEIR HAIR IS MESSY AS HELL CAUSE YOU HAVE TO GO ALL IN. THATS WHY THE KISS MARKS ARE SMUDGED TOO#theyre less violent in this au since theyre usually at home w you.. theyre just like. super clingy and spoiled#them as annoying ass cats.... the type to call (meow) out for you REALLY LOUDLY if you go behind a door cause youre their owner#what the hell are you doing leaving them alone?????#or the type to like lap over your lap obnoxiously if youre clearly busy. and purposely brush their tail over your face so you focus on them#i can see them being so spoiled and entitled to your attention but antagonize any guests that come by. they want to scratch at them SO BAD#but so they wont get in trouble w you. they listen for now#bro if they get smooches like this whenever you come home theyre THRIVING. what do you MEAN you need to go to bed. HURRY UP.#they just kinda hang around the house or leave for a stroll (to find you) then come back cause they cant miss their daily smoochies#if they miss out? punching the ground. annoying you. waking you up. telling you that you that he's late. dont leave him out or he'll DIE#(he wont)#annoying ass entitled cat boys...... spits
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daisybell-on-a-carousel · 4 months ago
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Still very wild to me when people try to gotcha Jason with the whole "if you can kill other people for being evil why can't they kill you" when jason is like. One of the most passively suicidal characters I've ever seen. What if man
#augh i dont want to cw this because im just talking about The Character and i feel bad when i do it for characters but i probably should#suicide mention#ask to tag#while im here i do absolutely believe hes been suicidal since jaybin times. maybe even before just in different ways. but like#going into that building with shelia? yeah#now. i DONT think he was aware of it and if youd ask him hed say no fully believing thats the truth#but like if a ghost jaybin had some introspection time i think he'd maybe eventually be like yeah#his outcomes to him were have a loving parent or die and hes a very big fan of ultimatums like that.#but he doesn't fully see it like that as jaybin because oh hes a hero and saving others when no one else can is what heros do :)#ramble. ivee been feeling it lately yknow how it is#ive once saw a post saying jason was planning to die after the joker was dead in utrh and yeagh i can see that#he puts A BOMB in his HELMET#suicidal characters in the context of hero stories are so fascinating to me. the self sacrifice.#the not caring about your own safety as long as you save someone else. the pushing yourself#the way itd be so easy to make it look like they just fell in battle. to be considered a hero in the end#anyway ive been glancing at suicidal jason todd fics. how bad is it that im still getting mad about characterization#because theyre not killing him right#AND ANOTHER THING. since im here and i try to avoid making posts about The Character like this so might as welk get it all out#think about suicidal jaybin as well as the fact 80s bruce very much considered suicidal people/people attempting like#weak and lazy? yells at them? i think thats about it. Very Much. je seems to straight up just hate them#again very much feel free to ask me to tag this one ^-^'#and i hope no one thinks im being callous here im very worried about that. i just its a very important part of his character to think about#and its fun to explore as someone who is passively suicidal myself#jason todd analysis#anyway no one look at me i am in my corner just rotating him#WAIT to clarify i dont think jaybin fully realized Just becauceof the heros sacrifice thing. i made it sound like that i believe#anyway. if you read him as suicidal since jaybin times and go to ditf with that lens like i did. well. the post death victim blaming..
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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago
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every morning 4am this is what i see when i wake
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robinson-graves · 24 days ago
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[sits up suddenly from my coffin] anybody fuck with my super danganronpa 2 x guy who didnt like musicals au
#i dont post my art for several months and then i return. back into danganronpa once again. and actively combining it with my other interests#for fun and whimsy.#sdr2#nagito komaeda#super danganronpa 2#danganronpa 2#hajime hinata#chiaki nanami#robin draws#anyways other than returning to danganronpa ive just been drawing ocs so i havent had much to share#yes thats ibuki vaguely in the bg she gets to be chiakis boss#sonia gets to be zoey so that she gets to control a helicopter and point a gun at hajime and chiaki#obv things have to be shifted around and changed for them to make sense in their roles but i think hajime as paul is the most#untouched one bc thats just early game hajime where he's freaking out about the fuckass island and how weird everything is#fuyuhiko gets to effectively be the role of bill with peko as alice but obv theyre not a father/daughter dynamic for this au#its altered. to fit Them. and their whole deal they got going on.#maybe fuyuhiko had tried to tell peko to leave and go live her own life but she came back for him and then. Oopsies. join the hive#gundham as professor hidgens would be so fucking funny. you must understand. instead of an alexa he's talking to his devas.#nagito tbh would work as professor hidgens but i made him fill mr. davidsons role for the sole fact of his song being the effective#“i want” song and that just felt too right to pass up#kazuichi fills the role of ted and he's mad that hajime didnt bring sonia#mikan filling charlottes role. junko is sam. i dont think i have to explain further. obv junko isnt a cop thats altered to fit her.#also no ted charlotte affair for this kaz has his eyes set on sonia and only sonia still and mikan has her beloved :)#also i just wanted mikan to have “join us (and die)” bc ogoghgoghgho thats one of my fav songs#greenpeace girl gets to be mahiru cause the personality just feels right.#imposter is Everywhere. i wanted to stick them in a designated role so bad but tbh they're just always there in a diff disguise#anyway im done tag rambling i've been brewing this in my brain for like a week.#feel free to let me know if i was cooking or not and offer ur own ideas and thoughts
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sonknuxadow · 2 months ago
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i genuinely dont get how so many people are uncritically excited for The Movie and have no issue with anything going on here i feel like im losing my mind a little bit . the trailers did not look good to me at all is everyone excited about it posting from an alternate dimension or something what are people seeing in this movie that im not .
#and i say this as someone whos standards are usually not that high and can have fun with most sonic media and liked the first 2 movies......#all i can feel is disappointment at how bad a job theyre doing at adapting sa2 and the disservice to certain characters/concepts#(obviously thats just based on the trailers i havent seen the movie and refuse to spend money on it so i cant give afull judgement#but the trailers certainly dont give a very good impression of the movie to me)#and before anyone says that its not an sa2 movie.theyre taking a lot of plot points and characters from sa2#and taking a lot of stuff from sa2 and using it in the marketing and such#they cant do all that and then go ''um actually its not an sa2 movie youre crazy for expecting an sa2 movie LOL''#i also wasnt expecting an exact recreation of sa2 either i would have bene fine with changes#but stuff like having gerald be alive and take rouge's spot in the dark story trio and making him a more comedic character#is ridiculous and feels inherently disrespectful to the source material#and thats not even getting into how it feels like im always hearing about some new awful thing#that paramount or one of the actors did which just makes me not wanna give them my money or time even more#sighhh i honestly just want this all to be over alerady and for the hype to die down so ican stop hearing about the movie#but i know its going to make one billion dollars and theyre just going to make more movies after this. hell on earth .
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shellem15 · 6 months ago
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Critters have given a million different reasons as to why we should or shouldn't kill the gods (myself included lol), but for me, it ultimately comes down to the fact that they're my blorbos and I love them. My fucked up little guys.
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internetdruid · 1 year ago
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Evening, ladies
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lokh · 4 months ago
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every day im reminded that though my parents may have wanted a dog they clearly did not want to take care of a dog
#and i KNEW this which was why i insisted on not getting dogs though they keep trying to gaslight me#into thinking that i agreed on the dogs. i didnt and i wish id railed against it harder#because ill be honest i knew i didnt want to take care of a dog i wasnt in the headspace#but i also knew that if they got the dog that the actual caring duties would be foisted off to me#and the things that They would have to do ie go to the vet nd pay the bills etc theyd complain about and avoid#and thats one thjng. but oh my fucking god. my dad specifically#its like hes trying to get these dogs to die. we have several plants in the backyard#bad for dogs. i point them out. i have pointed them out Several times.#theyre his plants the gardens his thats none of my things. he just goes oh they wont get into them#THEYRE DOGS. but he doesnt want to move his fucking plants#one of the dogs is on medicine but has a habit of not eating his food in the morning#which means if u leave his medicine in hjs bowl the other dog might eat it#one solution is to give him the tablet straight. because hes good about eating it#he doesnt want to because 'thats gross'. Are you five fucking years old#the dog doesnt like the texture of dry food so another solution is to wet it#dad wont do that either because 'hes too spoiled' and 'it takes time' ONE MINUTE?????????#like i have to assume this is some kind of ploy to make me do it instead when i dont wake up that early#because if its not then hes truly just incompetent or doesnt care about the dogs#which brings me back to WHY DID YOU GET THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE.#im sick of having to worry about them when he just does shit like this its wasting my time and its wasting money#but ohhhh we dont want to give the dogs away theyre part of the family 🥺#CLEARLY. because apparently u wanted kids but didnt want to take care of them either!!#im pissed off!!! im tired!!!!!!!!#i need to know im not going batshit here for being pissed off!!!!!#the dogs are getting back to back problems and at least some of it would have been mitigated by oh.#i dont know. the bare minimum?????#at least if the plants had been taken care of i wouldnt have to wonder if theyd just gotten into them#or if its an actual problem like a mass or bite. but no now i dont know#and at this rate were going to waste money going to the vet every fucking week
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spacedlexi · 11 months ago
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people dont talk enough about how heartbreaking the marlon betrayal mustve been for clem too,,
this dude saves the life of her and her kid. takes them in has them patched up gives them their first hot meal in who knows how long. gives them a safe place to stay. possibly permanently. confides in her that hes trying to be a good leader but feels like and fears that hes failing. asks her to help him take care of the rest of the group. helps her get over her fear of dogs by asking her to trust him. and things go well. she feels safe. like this place could really finally be the home shes been looking for
but as soon as she finds out what happened to the twins. that marlon planned on giving up her and aj too. she immediately becomes a liability to him and he attempts to kill her for it. locks her in the basement to die by walker. then tries to turn the group against her so he can shoot her instead when the first method fails. and he nearly succeeds
then a majority of the group turn against clem the minute aj kills marlon. ignoring marlons mistakes but condemning aj for his. like clem wasnt betrayed by marlon in the exact same way he betrayed the twins. like she literally wasnt almost killed twice? and how long had he been considering giving her up? was it always some contingency he planned? did he truly want to keep them around and things only changed when he feared the raiders had returned? she'll never know
#i think about this a lot... the betrayal... clems deep trust issues... then they all want to kick her out (except vi aasim and tenn 💕)#when she was just as impacted if not more so than the rest of them. since she was the only one with her Life on the line#thats why violet fighting so hard for them to stay is so important imo and would MEAN SO MUCH to clem too#vi and aasim are the only ones who can see past the bullshit and realize that theyre safer with clem around#while the rest would rather kick her out so they dont have to acknowledge their confused feelings about marlon#like first marlon betrays her then the rest of the group tell her to get fucked and die. dont come back. we never want to see you again#but she does. and she saves them#personally i do think marlon had 'good' intentions but he was a scared and fucked up kid who made bad decisions#and continued to make bad decisions to cover for his previous fuck ups#but that just makes him interesting :)#and i like teaching aj the difference between people like marlon and people like lilly#all of clems 'wow i feel so safe here :) and these guys seem smart :)' personal dialogue around ericsons makes me 😭#she was so happy to be at ericsons. and they turn against her so fast when she was more of a victim than any of them#aj is a literal baby. do not treat him like an adult who can make fully rationalized decisions. hes a baby and he only knows survival#at least they slowly get over it after clem comes back (some take longer than others...)#but the lack of compassion in voting to kick them out is heartbreaking. she was heartbroken#and thats not acknowledged as much as it should be#posting this old drafted post now cuz it expands my feelings on clems broken heartedness about the marlon situation#it speaks#twdg
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hampterguts · 9 months ago
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forever amazed and confused at how often transformers franchise just straight up depicts suicide attempts. like not even considering the superhero trope of "i have to save everyone!!! by choosing to die!!!!!" thing. like. non-allow-yourself-to-die-to-stop-a-thing-from-killing-everyone-immediately type situations. which tbh i wish more ppl talked about but not the point here
like. sure mtmte, a comic abt mentall illness and war, i expected it to be aware of the concept. but its not handled well and mostly used for shock value or "im better now i swear! i have a husband and everything" BUT ITS IN THE KIDS SHOWS TOO??? MY BESTIE G1 RODIMUS?? BEAST WARS DINOBOT???
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jrueships · 3 months ago
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WHOEVER THE FUCK IS RECOMMENDING MED PPL TO GO INTO RADIOLOGY JUST CUS IF THE MONEY, IM GONNA FUCKING gET YOU
#first i had ai dictacting schedules and now the radiologists just thought there was a AHHGGRHHH#YES. YES U CAN MAKE MONEY GOING INTO RADIOLOGY. BUT DO NO T. JU ST. GO INTO IT. for the MONEY#MEDICINE IS FKING PAIN BCS BUSINESS IS A PAIN & PPL ARE IN PAIN & PPL ARE A PAIN#like it is Very. ppl orientated it's FKING MEDICINE and even if ure a vet or whatever theres obvs usually humans attached fo animals#so like u might not always be dealing with the ppl but ur coworkers who are also being directly accounting#for the ppl SURE AS HELL DO#like yea ppl die all the time but ure telling me u dont gaf when u couldve done something to stop a LIFE#a HUMAN LIFE that was DEPENDING ON U just doing a like tiny action in the grand scheme of ur things#but ends up a major life changer to them even if they dont always have the knowledge to recognize it#and u let them die bcs of the money#i cant fcking STANDDDDDD IT ohmy GAWD.#also like radiology is not all that hunky dory like radiactive is part of the fking name like#UGHHHH LIKE IM SUPPOSED TO BE SCOLDING MY PTS WHY TF AM I SCOLDING MFS FOR MY PTS#anyways yea tho totally just join medicine for the money it's tofally not a massive damage to u n society#but also . fuck society for making ppl feel like they only have this choice or it's starvation bcs thats also so fking real fuc that#but bro at least try not to fuck ppl over once u gain a position just bcs u happened to be in a bad mood today like#medicine is Literally. horror. it's not that 'i watch pimple popping videos haha i can handle it' horror . it's literally.#the horror of treating humans like humans while never allowed to be one urself kind of horror#it's watching a little girl crying and a big bulky father weeping like a small child bcs his wife died#&then u step out the room and a pt throws his poop at u bcs he keeps lying to u abt not having any alcohol &wants to go home but has no ride#wants a million opiods and has been absolutely wailing at ur staff and if he leaves ama it docks u so now u gotta#peruse a bunch of legal documents to try and figure out a loophole on how to get him outta here while also dealing with 60 other pts#on the brink of death or intensely septic and the whole time ure trying to save them u got bitches screaming in ur ear abt the#north carolina fluid shortage like btch fuck that im giving this kid the shit they need to survive fuck off#especially funny bcs theres fluids available but we refuse to buy them bcs theyre for a higher price than our og supplier like ok#anyways#love my life
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itsalwaysdark · 6 months ago
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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is
#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And#make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not#saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was#going to say#like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so#bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the#winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000#other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but#i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its#been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody#responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple#muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it#but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like#im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good#solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start#all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the#punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4#im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but#even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think#avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is#like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they#hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be#the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO#difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15#minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case#it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel#stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and#tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i#tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction#like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint
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slutdge · 6 months ago
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ill just be minding my business and then remember how fucked the experience i had with cps was and just how fucked cps is in general and actively harms the children its supposed to be there to help and get so mad i dig a hole into my skin with my nails so deep it starts drawing blood
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lord-squiggletits · 11 months ago
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Something else that makes me sympathetic to Pharma's situation is like. Idk if there's an actual term for this or if someone smarter and more academic wrote it about some real life context that actually matters.
But, so we've already established among Pharma stans that the circumstances at Delphi were blackmail/torture with no real way out that wouldn't involve Pharma being responsible for people getting killed (either killing patients for the deal or having everyone die bc he failed his end of the deal).
And I feel like while "he's still in the wrong because he killed people" is part of it, another sort of implicit part is the idea that Pharma should've been willing to take more personal risk, maybe even risk dying? I mean, Ratchet does ask "why didn't you just detonate it near the DJD" (to which Pharma responds that he did try to get Sonic and Boom to do it, but they refused) so like
Idk I feel like we do have this social notion of martyrs as a very romantic ideal, people you can praise for being so brave and strong and righteous that they ended their own lives for their cause, while you can also coo about how sad and tragic it is that dying is what it took for them to do the right thing. But at the same time I feel like in reality, having an expectation that people become martyrs is kind of a toxic social norm bc like. It's very easy to demand that others sacrifice their lives for some Ultimate Moral Good when you yourself aren't experiencing the same hardships as they are. And ultimately it is kind of fucked up to tell someone "the moral thing you should've done was risk your life/kill yourself" because asking someone to pay their life to do the right thing is no small request. And sure, the typical response would be to call them a "coward" for caring more about saving their own skin instead of doing the right thing... but again, death is a really scary thing and self-preservation is a really strong instinct, so it kind of feels like having this binary view of "you're either a Brave Hero who sacrifices your life for everyone else or a Dirty Coward who's too scared of dying to do what's right" is kind of fucked up?
I guess the best way to describe it is that if someone willingly gives up their life as a sacrifice to others, it can be a noble thing because it's a choice they made willingly, but if it becomes a Moral Standard that in order to be a Good Person you have to be unafraid of throwing your life away and if you aren't willing to die you're a Cowardly Bad Person, that's when it becomes toxic.
Idk, I guess how this ties back to Pharma is that he was never in a position where he expected to make these kinds of moral decisions/ultimatums. He's a doctor who doesn't even get into combat, his job is to heal and not to kill, he's behind the front lines in a hospital that's supposed to be a safe, neutral place for him to heal people. So in the face of suddenly having a "murder people on behalf of me, or I murder everyone you swore to protect" ultimatum thrust upon him, I understand why Pharma wasn't """"""""""brave enough"""""""""" to "do the right thing" (whatever that would've been in the case of Delphi). You could argue that maybe a frontliner soldier accepted the burden of possibly dying for their cause and they've become used to it as someone who lives that reality every single day, but I feel like for Pharma, who's a doctor and a protected non-combatant (from what we can tell), that sort of risking of his life/living with the fact his life could be snuffed out any day isn't something he would've been prepared for at all.
And for me personally, from an outsider's perspective, it strikes me as kind of unethical to go "oh well he should've just detonated the bomb himself even if it killed him" bc again, there's a difference between witnessing a moral conundrum as a bystander versus being the person living with it and being under time pressure where it's do-or-die. Just as part of my personal standards, I feel like death is such a huge consequence/burden of someone's actions (literally you are no longer alive, any potential you had left is cut short, you cease to exist on this plane) that it feels rather callous to go "Well you should've just been willing to die for your beliefs if you really cared that much!!!"
#squiggposting#pharma apologism#this is only like tangentially related to pharma honestly#not to compare blorbos to real life but like. it reminds me of this phenomenon where privileged ppl in privileged countries#will tell ppl living in zones of war and strife 'oh well if you don't like your gov so bad just revolt against them'#like oh yes tell me how easy it is to stand up against the threats of torture and death#surely the only reason people would want to avoid that is bc they're cowards or don't want to stand up for their beliefs#contrary to what nationalism would have ppl believe. 'wanting to not die' isn't a moral position#everyone wants to live. no one wants to die. it doesnt make you a bad person to be scared of dying#esp (going back to blorbo's) in a situation like pharma's where every option he had ended in death#the death of his patients or the death of everyone at delphi or his death personally#on top of the fact he's a noncombatant who hasn't been desensitized to violence/risking his own life#and is dealing with a trained group of killers that he can't possibly match on physical terms#so yeah actually i don't blame pharma for what he did#he made shitty decisions in a shitty situation but was ultimately a victim#also if you want to view the blackmail deal from a framework of abuse#it is also fucked up to basically tell someone they werent brave enough to just kill their accuser or ask for help#isnt the entire point of such situations that the victim is both powerless to stop the abuse#and too afraid of asking for help/thinks they cant ask for help. and thats why they dont just get out#idk sometimes the best moral judgement is to forgive someone or view it as 'complicated'#sometimes regardless of the good or evilness of their actions the best choice is to not make a judgement#or to err in favor of a forgiving/'i cant speak for your experience' judgement#anyways the fact is that the rosy fantasy of being a brave noble soldier who sacrifices for the cause#rarely stands up to reality where youre just terrified and powerless and dont know what to do#and suddenly the rosy glow of The Noble Cause isnt comforting in the prospect of horrible torturous death
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