#nigga what. common sense
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indi-glo-archive · 12 days ago
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hear me out on this: people responding to loveless people with "but you, like, love your family/friends, right?" reminds me of when I say Heartstopper's super racist and ableist and people ask "but you like the show, right?"
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trippinsorrows · 7 months ago
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with me + part fifteen
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authors note: i hope everyone has recovered from the last chapter! just remember, there's, typically, light at the end of the tunnel!
status: in progress // masterlist
warnings: violence, angst, language, suggestive themes
song inspo: with me by destiny’s child
faceclaims
words: 7k
taglist: @pixiedust4000 @yolobloggers @msbigredmachine @southerngirl41 @wanderingreigns
Alexis is going to jail.
She’s accepted as such and doesn't really care about that as much as she's curious about what the charges will be. Aggravated assault. Attempted murder. Actual murder. It’s all up in the air, each a very much real possibility. 
Truth be told, she’s wanted to put the paws on Mariah for years. And not even because Mariah has done anything outright, not close to this level anyways. It was just something about her that screamed fake and inauthentic. However, she recognized what friendship and loyalty meant to you, and while you’d mentioned a few arguments over the years, nothing was major enough for her to act on her violent urges.
Now though? 
Now, she’s ready to rain fire. 
She doesn’t give a flying fuck about traffic laws, well exceeding every speed limit she zooms through in order to make it to Mariah’s house. It’s an address that wasn’t too hard to find. Google is such a wonderful thing. She would have asked you for that information, but she also wants you as separate from what she’s about to do as possible. Especially with DCFS in the midst of an active investigation.
Just thinking about it pisses her off even more. It’s one thing to call DCFS on someone who’s arguably one of the best parents on this fucking earth, but it’s another to accuse said parents of the things Mariah accused you. 
It’s unforgivable. 
It’s also why Alexis won’t feel somewhat content until she spills Mariah’s blood. Pulling up into the driveway behind the parked Camry, Alexis shuts off the car, reaches for the bat in the passenger seat and slams the door behind her as she marches up the three steps to the front door. Her fists immediately start banging on the door. “Open the door, hoe!” More banging. “I know you in there! Come outside so I can crack ya’ fucking head open!”
Alexis isn’t stupid. She knows no one with common sense would open the door to anyone yelling such things. Cue: the bat. 
Moving across the porch, Alexis doesn’t hesitate to give a solid swing to the window, effectively cracking it. The second blow is the one, however, that shatters it. She kicks through the remnants and proceeds to climb in. 
With a possible element of surprise, Alexis opts to remain quiet, looking around the living room. She’s tempted to smash the TV but decides against it, as she’d much rather save her strength for blows against Mariah’s body.
Moving throughout the house, she’s lucky enough for the first door she kicks open to reveal her victim. 
But Mariah isn’t alone.
In a pleasant surprise. Alexis just so happens to walk in on Mariah receiving backshots from a man who quickly stumbles and looks back over his shoulder at her entrance. Alexis immediately recognizes him. 
Amir.
“Now ain’t this about a bitch!” Alexis' smile is wild and crazed as she watches Amir stumble to cover himself, Mariah’s eyes also wide with horror and shock as she holds the sheet to her chest. “A two for one special. My lucky fucking day.”
“What the hell?” Amir has managed to pull his boxers on and is standing near the bed, close to Mariah in an almost protective manner. Like that’ll keep her safe from Alexis' wrath. “Alexis? What the fuck are you doing?”
“I would ask ya’ll niggas the same thing, but ain’t no sense in stating the obvious.” She motions between the two of them with her steel bat. “How long?”
Mariah screams, the fear in her voice and eyes music to Alexis soul. “Get out of my house!”
“Oh, Imma leave, but not until you’re unconscious.” She looks toward Amir. “And if you try to get in my way, Imma knock your ass out too.” Alexis' hands are rated E for everyone. She fights females and males with equal smoke. “Now, I’m not gon’ ask again, how long have ya’ll been fucking behind Y/N’s back?”
Truth be told, Alexis wouldn’t trust a single word out of either of their mouths, but she’s curious. The answer regardless will aid in the intensity of her beating. 
Amir is the first to ‘answer’. “I don’t owe Y/N shit. She’s not my girl.” As if he has a right to be upset, he continues, anger painting his face. “I tried, but she chose to be with that nigga.” 
“And will every single mother fucking time because unlike you, he’s actually worth something and deserves her. Not like you two snakes.” It’s the fact that Amir thinks that he’s been done wrong in some way that blows her mind. He might be as delusional as the bitch he was just fucking. “I’m tired of talking. Get the fuck out my way, so I can knock this hoe’s head off.”
It’s when Alexis takes a step toward the bed that Amir extends his arm out, “wait, before you do this—”
“Do you even know what she did?” Alexis demands, grip on the bat tightening as she remembers holding you as you cried into her over having your child ripped away from you. The fear in Callie’s eyes. It enrages her all over again. “Ask the bitch! Go on, ask her!”
Amir is still understandably cautious and pissed at this intrusion, but his gaze still falls on Mariah. “What is she talking about?”
Mariah pauses and shakes her head, stuttering. “I–I don’t know. She’s–she’s crazy.”
“She’s a liar!” Alexis shouts, explaining to Amir. “She called DCFS on Y/N and made up all kind of lies!” She juggs the bat in the direction of that slime. “They took Callie away from Y/N because of her!”
It seems like there’s a sudden shift that Alexis recognizes as the tide gradually turning. She still thinks Amir is a piece of shit, but it does count for a tiny something that he looks absolutely disgusted by this revelation. His eyes narrow at Mariah. “You did what?” Mariah’s face gives away her guilt as he demands, “what the hell is wrong with you? Why would you do that!”
Clearly adept at deviating, Mariah attempts to redirect the focus. “You really gon’ believe this bitch over me!” 
Alexis laughs, throwing her head back. She’s really going to enjoy breaking this bitch jaw.
Amir seems heated now. Again, not that Alexis really cares. He’s not much better than this hoe in her book. “You got her child taken away from her, Mariah! What part of that do you not understand is fucked up! You’ve gone too fucking far!”
“If Callie got taken away, then she should have been doing a better job making sure her kid was straight instead of chasing a married around like a desperate who—”
Alexis lunges, literally lunges, across the room before Mariah can even finish her sentence. There’s a sickening crack that enters the air when her fist collides with Mariah’s nose. Mariah’s cry is sounded out by Alexis snatching her by her hair and banging her head into the headboard. “Say it, bitch! Say it so I can knock ya fucking teeth out your mouth.”
“Get off me!” Mariah screams, but it’s no use, Alexis blows are powerful and focused, knuckles burning from the impact with bone, not that it makes a difference to her. She’s only seeing and hearing red.
“I been wanted to stomp your hoe ass!” And Alexis does just that, dragging and tossing Mariah onto the floor and stomping her feet into Mariah’s side. 
Mariah is crying like a little bitch, screaming, “help me!” 
But Amir does nothing, just stands there watching as Alexis rains blow on top of blow, kick on top of kick to the broad he was just balls deep in minutes ago. It speaks volumes of his character, not that that was much to behold anyway.
However, it’s when she cries out again, “we got a fucking son together, Amir!”
This actually takes Alexis by surprise as she realizes what Mariah just said. She knows the bitch has a son, but she also knows this woman is married. Though estranged, still married. Is…..is Amir the biological father of her son? Has she really been messing with Amir long enough for him to possibly father her baby?
Is that why she’s estranged from her husband?
That’s a whole other layer that adds to the betrayal. Alexis starts mixing on Mariah again, ignoring the splatter of blood on her fists and the possibility that her child might be just a room or two away.
At least she still has her kid. 
“That’s enough.” Amir’s voice finally sounds from behind her, but Alexis is in the zone. She’s not letting up off this hoe. “Alexis, that’s enough!” And then he makes the cardinal mistake of trying to interfere, reaching to pull her off Mariah. Instantly, Alexis reaches behind and lands her fist against his face.
“Fuck!” He calls out. Alexis grabs the bat, swinging it across his knee. Amir cries out and falls on his back, cradling his knee. “You crazy bitch!”
“That’s right, I’m the crazy bitch that’s gon come back and fuck both ya’ll asses up again if you ever in your life try Y/N!” Alexis realizes Mariah is on the verge of losing consciousness, so she ensures she grabs her by her raggedy tracks. “You stay the hell away from her, you hear me? You even so much as utter her name, utter Callie’s name, and I’mma put you six feet under!” A final stomp to Mariah’s jaw is the last thing she sees before being knocked unconscious. 
Breathing heavy, Alexis looks around, pleased with her carnage only to see Amir starting to stand up, knee obviously fucked up. “I didn’t—I didn’t know.”
Alexis marches over to him and punches him square in his nose, satisfied with the crunch sound that follows. He curses loudly, hands over his nose that’s started to spurt out blood. 
“Bitch ass nigga,” she mutters, taking one final survey of the room and walking out, pleased with the results. She suddenly feels so much better, hungry but deeply satisfied. Curious, she asks a groaning Amir.
“Ya’ll got a McDonald’s in this town?”
—---------
The knock on the door is probably the first thing to make you feel anything in hours. You’ve just laid on the bed all day, staring at the empty wall across the room. The apartment is quiet. It’s never quiet. 
Not since you first brought Callie home from the hospital. You miss her giggles, her loud singing, the patterning of her feet as she runs into your room, jumping on the bed, rambling about the most random of things.
You wished that her being with your mom and not some random family would provide more comfort than it does, but as soon as you try to find some relief in that, your mind goes towards why she’s with your mom and the fact that you are legally barred from speaking to and interacting with the child you birthed and have raised since she first entered this world.
That’s when the tears come. You’re not sure there’s many left to be honest.
So, a knock on the door is the closest thing you have to hope, hope that someway, somehow, someone with enough pull was able to make all of this go away, make this nightmare of a reality a thing of fiction. 
Running to the front door, that hope is both dashed yet sustained when you rip it open. 
Turns out you’re wrong, there are definitely more tears left.
“Joe…”
You’re not sure who makes the move first, probably him, because the moment his eyes land on you, his expression softens into something sympathetic. 
He’s holding the back of your head as you cry into his chest, comforting you. And then it hits you. You pull away, holding onto his shirt, “did you see her? H-how is she?”
You made sure to emphasize that Joe needed to check in on Callie before coming to see you, not that it was something he needed to be told. You’re certain his first and foremost priority was checking in on Callie. 
He wipes at your eyes. “She’s okay.” It’s a safe answer, one that’s probably both partially and impartially true. How okay can she be in a situation like this? His response is more for your comfort than anything, you’re sure. “I got her down for bed before I left.” His eyes give you a one over. “When’s the last time you ate something?”
You’re certain you must look a mess. You also don’t care about that. You don’t really care about much to be honest. 
Still, it’s a valid question that takes you a second to contemplate. “I–I don’t know.” And before he can say something further, you inform, “I’m not hungry.”
“You need to eat something.”
“No, I–what I need is to start getting this place together.” Pulling away from him, sniffling and wiping at your eyes, you motion around your apartment. “They’re doing the home inspection tomorrow.”
In between tears and depression, you’d received formal notice regarding the home visit where they’d evaluate the environment to ensure its appropriateness for a child as well as your emergency court date. 
Joe’s gaze is on you and lazily scans the room that’s more or less spotless. “It looks fine, Y/N.”
“Fine isn’t good enough, Joe,” your voice is firmer, a hint of irritation. “It has to be perfect so they can—” Without even realizing what’s happening, another unexpected set of tears arrives, your voice cracking. “—so they can give my baby back to me.”
He guides you back into his chest, comforting you as the next set of waterworks overcomes you. You’ve always hated crying, always found it irritating because it was hard to control, even harder to stop. This is all of those things. 
“I can’t believe she would—would do this to me.” That’s the part you still can’t wrap around. How could you not see what kind of person Mariah was? You’ve always thought you were a good judge of character. This was Callie’s legal godmother for fucks sake. “Do you know what she said about me? What she said I was going to do—” Your mouth watering and stomach twisting alerts you to what’s about to come, and you dash away from him to the bathroom where you fall to your knees, vomiting into the toilet. 
Joe is behind you not even minutes later, hand on the small of your back as you cry over that same toilet. There’s a level of appreciation for him being here with you in this moment, but it still doesn’t wholly ease that dull ache in your chest. 
Getting cleaned up, Joe doesn’t take no for an answer when he says that he’s going to make you something to eat and you’re going to eat. Deep down, you know he’s right. Not only are you teetering on sleep deprivation, but the lack of food in your system is eventually going to take a toll. And you need to be at your absolute best the next few days. 
However, even with his delicious cooking and emotional support, it’s not enough to keep your emotions at bay because you end up right back at that toilet, depositing everything you just tried to consume.
You just feel so off, so incomplete, because you are. 
Because you don’t know you’re supposed to proceed without your child. How you’re supposed to proceed and act like your world hasn’t been turned upside down, like you’re not in a position where you have to prove that you’re a fit parent. 
Something you could have never imagined you’d be having to prove. This whole situation, nightmare, has pushed you so much farther in the direction of wanting to move.
Mariah’s play has stolen your sense of security in this town, the place you’ve always called home. It feels like you’ll never be able to feel comfortable again so long as she’s also a resident. Blocking her on all platforms isn’t enough. You don’t want her to have any access to you or Callie whatsoever.
And that can only be done with moving. 
A small part of you considers talking with Joe about you and Callie staying at his place in Florida for the time being until you find a house. And you hate that, the idea of uprooting your and Callie’s life so suddenly. Not even being able to stay until the end of the school year, not being able to give your students the proper time to transition and adjust to your departure.
But you have to think about your family, your child, and what’s best for her.
It's starting to become more and more clear that the best thing you can do at this point is leave.
If not the only thing. ________
“She finally sleep?”
After treating herself to McDonalds, Alexis casually reached out to her legal team to let them know she could be facing a couple of charges and to be ready to bail her out once the warrant was issued. They were already fast ahead in working towards a plan to get said charges dismissed, so she's honestly not concerned at all.
And even if they aren’t dismissed, she doesn't mind. 
She’d do it all over again if she had to. 
So, after getting cleaned up and settling her affairs, she headed back over to the apartment to check on you. Alexis wasn’t surprised to find you still heavily upset, but the physical sickness was hard to watch. She’s so grateful that you listened to her and called Joe. She can’t imagine you going through this without his support.
“I got her to agree to take Benadryl.” Joe’s eyes are focused on the island as he sits down at the barstool and leans back. Alexis hasn’t been around Joe a ton, but that’s not needed to tell he’s a myriad of emotions right now, primarily anger. He adds, clearly concerned, “she can’t keep anything down.”
“She’s a wreck,” Alexis says as kindly as she can, because it’s the ugly truth. She’s always known you to be so calm and composed. This is anything but. Yes, there were a couple moments where you lost your temper. But post Callie? You’ve been the textbook definition of what it looks like to be a picture of calmness in a storm. 
Now….now you’re just a disaster.
Not that a single soul could blame you.
“How is Callie? Like, really?” Alexis isn’t sure if asking him this right now is the right move, but she’s genuinely curious. She’d take a bet that he played it down for the sake of your current mental state.
“Confused. Sad as hell. Doesn’t know why the fuck she’s just been ripped from her mother for no reason.” His anger is palpable and completely understandable. 
Alexis listens, working to control her own anger. Mariah’s beating wasn’t good enough. “It’s fucked up. That’s for sure.”
His jaw is clenched as she states, boldly, “I’ve gotta get them out of this damn town.” 
Alexis looks at him, partially not following his statement. “Aren’t they already moving to live with you?
“Yes, at the end of the summer, but that’s not soon enough.” She hears what he’s saying, but she isn’t quite sure about the realistic aspect of what he clearly wants at this point. “I need them out of here now.”
Alexis takes a second before responding, not wanting to further upset him. Typically, she doesn’t give two shits about how her words are perceived, but this is an entirely different situation. “You’re not wrong, Joe, but Y/N can’t just up and leave—”
“We don’t have much of a fucking choice, Alexis.” His tone, if not for the current circumstances, would be completely unacceptable. He’s talking to her like she’s a child, but Alexis knows emotions are high, so she sets aside her pride. “I don’t want that bitch anywhere near them.” 
Careful with her words, she counters calmly, “you know there’s a chance Y/N's not going to like that.” 
Alexis knows you, and knows that you like order. You’d want to properly close out the year, have time to say goodbye. Then again, after something like this, she’s not actually 100% sure where you’d stand on moving sooner than initially planned.
Joe then brings up a valid point. “It’s not about what she likes and doesn’t like. It’s about Calista and what’s best for her.” He’s not wrong, Alexis won’t deny him that. “Mariah is fucking psychotic, and I’m not taking any more chances with her pulling anymore shit like this. I’ve already contacted my lawyers to see what options we have there.”
Joe lawyering up makes all the sense in the world. It’s probably the smartest decision for him and Y/N, which is why she’s so grateful she stopped you from catching an unnecessary charge. “I can beat her ass again once she gets released from the hospital. It was quite therapeutic actually.” Alexis is slightly pleased to hear Joe chuckle at her words, even if she’s being completely honest. “I’ll tell you this, but don’t tell Y/N. She’s got enough she’s dealing with.” 
Joe is quick to assert. “I don’t like keeping things from her.”
Ignoring his counter, Alexis supplies, “Mariah was fucking Amir when I got there. Like, I literally caught them in bed.” 
As expected, Joe looks taken back, “what?”
She nods and adds, “but that’s not it. When the stupid bitch was begging for him to help her, she said they have a son together.” Lowering her voice in case you somehow fought the powers of Benadryl, she concludes, “I think Amir is the biological father of her kid,”
“Son of a bitch,” he mutters. Joe is suddenly wishing he acted upon impulse instead of logic and beat the shit out of Amir that night he had the chance. That bastard really was a scumbag. He’s also partially wishing he’d tagged along with Mariah. Joe would never put his hands on a woman, but Amir? He’d be laid out in the hospital just like Mariah is. “Just how long have they been messing around?”
“Long enough for her to get knocked up by him.” She shakes her head, trying to settle the growing anger. “God, I hate her ass. Him too, but definitely her. How do you just fuck your best friend’s ex like that? When you know she’s fucking him too? Fuckin nasty ass hoe.” 
He won’t disagree, sharing, “you probably already know this, but Mariah used to mess with Randy Orton, and he'd said she ended up being clingy and crazy when he broke it off.” 
“Really?” Alexis remembers you mentioning to her that Mariah was sleeping with a wrestler around the same time you first got with Joe but nothing about how it ended. “That lines up.”
“I never really paid much attention to it, because she wasn’t relevant to me, and Orton was an ass back in the day, so I took it with a grain of salt.” A heavy frown appears on his handsome face. “Clearly, that was a mistake.”
Realizing what’s happening, she shakes her head. “Oh my god. Not you too.” She jumps into her therapist mode, nearly repeating exactly what she’d said to you this morning. “This is no one’s fault except for Mariah. Not yours. Not Y/N’s, just that raggedy hoe.” 
Joe tries his best to heed to Alexis’s advice. “You’ve never liked her, right?” Alexis nods aggressively. “Why?” 
“I always felt like she was jealous of Y/N. Like….she benefited way more from her friendship with Y/N than Y/N did. When we were in college, Y/N was popular and well liked, and I get the sense that that’s always been the case. Mariah clearly benefited from that, so the jealousy wasn’t as bad, not enough for Y/N to notice it anyway.” Alexis starts to speculate, though she feels it’s more fact than hypothesis. “But then you come back in the picture, and the tide turns. Y/N gets the guy, the kid, the happy family. And then on top of all that, homegirl finally gets exposed, so Y/N, rightfully, cuts her off. But psycho-riah wasn’t having that.”
Laying it all out like that makes sense to both Joe and Alexis. It’s obvious Mariah is disturbed, because only a person not right in the head would do what she’s done. All of the things she’s done. But maybe it never got this bad because she and Y/N were always around the same level, both living in this small ass town, just raising their kids. 
Then he came in the picture, and she got jealous. 
It makes sense.
It also pisses him the fuck off. 
“This probably isn’t the right time to ask this, but I’m gonna do it anyway, because you never know when my warrant is gonna become active.” There’s such a casualness and nonchalant manner regarding how Alexis refers to her pending arrest, like it’s not that big a deal. And for her, it really isn’t. She knows her lawyers will most likely have her out on bond and charges dropped or dismissed by the end of the week. Hence her prying. “But just when in the hell do you plan to propose to Y/N?”
It’s definitely a 180 in topics that Joe wasn’t expecting, especially when she continues.
“I know it’s gotta be coming soon, because it’s obvious you love the mess out of her and want to be with her forever, but when, sir? Don’t be having my girl out here as a glorified girlfriend for too long, cause I don’t care how big you are, you can catch that Mariah Edition beating right along with her.” Joe smiles, shaking his head. It’s a much needed break from all the heaviness of the day. “And you best not get her knocked up again before it happens.” She considers her words and retracts. “Then again, ya’ll both freaky as hell and fuck like rabbits, so maybe that one is a stretch.”
With a casual shrug, Joe goes for his response. “Who says I don’t al—”
“Wait. Don’t say anything.” She interrupts, hands up as if remembering something. “I suck at keeping secrets, and I’m sure you’re gonna go all out for the proposal, so don’t tell me shit.” She nods, as if trying to convince herself that this is the safest and best route. “Just make sure I get an invite to the wedding. Then again, I’ll just show up anyway regardless.”
He has zero doubt she won’t.
But while Alexis' random tangent brings about brief relief, his mind easily switches back to the major issue at hand. 
“You know I’m right, Lex.” He looks at her, again reiterating, “they can’t stay here.” It’s in expressing her theory about Mariah aloud that helps Alexis realize Joe’s even more valid in his stance than she thought. “I can’t have this happen again. Y/N and Callie can’t have this happen again especially. They’re both a mess.” He looks down, jaw clenching. “I can’t see them go through this again.” 
There’s no desire or basis to argue. Alexis can’t imagine how difficult this must be for him as well. To see all this happening, to see the two people he loves the most be in pain and not be able to do anything about it. 
It’s gotta be torture.
She finally settles on a simple, basic answer. “You’re right.”
Joe is quiet for a few moments, expression indicating he’s searching and trying to navigate something. Alexis watches as he suddenly pulls out his phone, typing hurriedly. She figures he's sending a text to someone when he finally says, “I need you to do something for me.”
There’s not a second of hesitation. “Consider it done.”
“Good.” He doesn’t waste any time, recognizing every moment that passes is precious. “How quickly can you get a flight out to Florida?”
________
Before agreeing to take the tiny pink pill of sleep damnation, you made Joe promise to wake you up at 7am sharp. The home inspection was scheduled for 3pm, but you have something you need to do before then.
And Joe is true to his word, stirring you awake not a minute past 7.
Despite his protest and disagreement, you skip breakfast. It’s going on two days since you’ve actually had and retained a meal, but you can’t bring yourself to do so, your abs already sore from all the contractions that come with vomiting.
So, you settle on coffee and get to cleaning. Joe helps you, though there’s not much to be done, just little things that the average person wouldn’t pay much attention to. But, you’re not taking any risks. Your place needs to be as spotless as humanly possible. 
And you need to look as good as you can, so you spend much more time than necessary in the shower, scrubbing your body clean, shaving every piece of hair that doesn’t need to be there. All very much over the top, but you don’t care. You need to feel prepared. 
You even take on the daunting task of laying your mass of curls into a slick top bun. In your opinion, it’s always made you look ten times more professional. Even if it does take ten times as long to accomplish because of all your hair. 
Still, worth it. Everything is worth it if it means having your daughter back in your custody. 
It’s why you dig through your closet for the nicest set of business professional attire that you own, some nice dress pants and a white blouse that beautifully compliments your complexion. 
The top has always been a little snug around your chest, which is expected, even if feeling a little tighter than usual.
What you don’t expect or need is to slide on said pants only to find out you can’t get them to snap. Even the jump and wiggle to better adjust it over your ass and thighs isn’t enough to secure the button.
You stand there for a moment, only briefly stumped. You’re realizing that one of your earlier assumptions before this whole mess was correct.
You’ve put on weight.
It was something you first started to notice when you looked again at the post Alexis made of you on your Instagram. You could see it a little in your face, but mostly your ass and thighs. Thankfully, you’ve always typically carried your weight in all the right places. And it isn’t anything too crazy, maybe something only you notice because you know your body better than anyone.
But, it’s enough to where your go-to pants no longer fit. 
It’s not too concerning, especially with everything else you have going on. You’ve always yo-yo’d a bit with your weight and interestingly enough, the same happened in the months after your first meeting with Joe all those years ago.
“Happy weight,” you’re sure Alexis would call it. 
Sliding them off, you settle on another pair, close to your favorites and a size bigger. They snap closed, and that little thing makes you feel instantly relieved.
It’s another thirty minutes before you finally exit the bedroom, face beat in neutral yet professional makeup. Joe moves from where he was texting on the sofa and approaches you.
Concern is etched in the crinkles around his eyes. “Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you?”
“No. I—I got this. Go—go spend the day with Callie.” Because I’d do anything to be able to do just that. “You probably shouldn’t even be here around me.”
It’s partially true. Joe isn’t even on Callie’s birth certificate, so as far as the law is concerned, you’re the only parent under investigation. Still, the irrational fear is strong that they’ll find some reason to add him to the investigation if they find out he’s been interacting with both you and Callie.
You can’t even think about what hell it would be if Joe was also barred from having any engagement with Callie.
You couldn’t handle it. Callie couldn’t handle it. And Joe wouldn’t stand for it. You know that for certain. He wouldn’t give a damn what the law stated.
“Yeah, that’s not fucking happening.” His dismissal is swift and firm. You have a feeling there isn’t a force on earth that could keep him from being with you right now. From being around Callie. “Are you sure you don’t want to try to eat something?”
Shaking your head, you explain. “No. I can’t risk vomiting again. I drank some Gatorade. I’ll be fine.” You don’t have a choice. Voice softening, you apologize again. “I’m so sorry about all of this. I had no idea she could ever—“
He stops you before you can get choked up. Joe's hands are on your face, comforting, “none of this is your fault, and I don’t blame you for anything. None of it.” His thumb brushes softly against your cheek. “But….but I do think we need to discuss moving up the move date for you and Callie.”
“I know.” You're certain he expected more of a push back from you, some level of argument, but he won’t find it. Mariah has taken that right away from you. “We—we can talk about it more later, okay?”
Understandably, he’s pleased and brings his hand to your hip, giving a gentle squeeze. “You should get going.” He’s right. The sooner you tackle this, the sooner you can focus on nailing this visitation. 
He kisses your forehead, lips lingering as he murmurs, “I love you.”
You’ll never get tired of hearing those words leave his mouth, needing to hear them now more than ever. You’re so grateful for him and all he does. “I love you too.”
You’re grabbing your purse and keys off the key holder on the wall when he calls out your name. 
“Mariah didn’t say anything to you before this, right? Outside of the exchange that day you told me about?” His question takes you by surprise, and he adds, probably not wanting you to feel like you’re on the witness stand. “My lawyers want to know if we can establish a paper trail.”
He’d mentioned reaching out to his legal team to see what recourse was available, but it isn’t something you’re overtly thrilled about. You understand where he’s coming from, but that’s not a route you’re sure you want to go down. Legal battles, from what you know, can get really ugly. And there’s a massive fear that somehow Callie will get dragged into the mess, forced to answer to lawyers and judges.
Your baby’s been traumatized enough already.
It’s why you decide on an answer that’s not the truth, but what you feel is best for your daughter. Once this is all said and done, you just want to put this all behind you and focus on your family.
Besides, there’s nothing else Mariah can do at this point, no lower she can stoop.
“No.” Even as it leaves your mouth, there’s a deep, nagging feeling that you’ve made the wrong decision not being honest with him. “She never said anything.”
—---------
“Is Dr. Sawyer available?”
Your voice is strong, firm, the exact opposite of everything you’ve felt over the past 48 hours. It’s a great display of fake confidence. 
The receptionist looks up with a surprisingly friendly smile. “I’m sorry, do you have an appointment or—”
“I’m an old friend. I really need to talk to him. It’s, uhh, it’s an emergency.” It may be a bit of a stretch to call your desire to get some questions answered an emergency, but you’ll say and do whatever it takes to get Kai’s attention. “Tell him it’s Y/N.”
She asks you to give her a few minutes, and you decide to take a seat in the waiting area. Pulling out your phone, you text Joe to let him know you’ve made it here and ready to text your mom when you suddenly remember.
That’s been the other hard part of this debacle. Going through one of the hardest things you’ve ever endured and not being able to talk to your mom about it. If you had to choose between her guidance and your daughter being put under her care, you’d go with the latter every single time.
But that doesn’t take way the sadness you have at not being able to talk to your own mother. 
“Y/N?”
Lifting your attention form your phone, you’re met with Kai Sawyer’s signature smile. 
He looks both surprised and relieved to see you.
“Hi. I’m sorry to bother you—”
“No. Not a bother at all.” He sits down on the seat opposite of you, and given the only couple people in the ER are on the other side of the waiting room, you decide this is a safe place to talk. “I’m actually happy to see you Y/N.”
There’s something wary about his tone of voice, like he’s hinting at something he won’t outright say. That’s when you remember the sole reason Kai was even inserted into your life again, and it hits you. “DCFS spoke to you, didn’t they?”
It makes all the sense. Callie was rushed to the emergency room and had to undergo emergency surgery. You’re certain her medical records are also being reviewed, that kind of incident standing out to investigators.
Kai might be aware of the anxiety that’s starting to grow and proceeds to explain. “Yes, and I told them it was absolute bullshit.” His face takes on a look of disgust and irritation. “That it’s been years since I’ve seen a child so deeply connected and bonded with a parent like I saw with you and Callie. Her appendicitis and subsequent surgery was completely happenstance, and you did everything right.”
His words bring tears to your eyes. You know you’re a good mom and did the best you could that night, but it means a lot that Kai would defend you so staunchly who are trying to determine just that. “Thank you, Kai.”
“I didn’t say anything that was a lie.” His expression is sympathetic. “I’m really sorry this is happening to you, Y/N. Do you have any idea who made the call?”
“That’s actually why I’m here.” You blot at your eyes, not wanting to test the hold of this waterproof mascara. “Do you remember when you told me you were happy I got away from Mariah and Amir?”
“Yeah, why?” His eyes widen with shock. “Wait, did they—“
“It was Mariah.” Swallowing, there’s a bit of an edge in your voice as you explain. “That’s why I’m here. I need to know just who the hell I’ve called a best friend all these years, so much so that I made her Callie’s legal godmother.”
“Whoa, I thought—-you were still friends with her after all these years?” You shake your head yes, and he looks truly apologetic. “I’m sorry, I just thought—”
“That I’d been smarter? Yeah, me too.” Aside from depression and apathy, you’re struggling with beating yourself up for not recognizing sooner what kind of person Mariah truly is. How your oblivion could be strong. “Please, tell me what you know.”
He blows out a deep breath and leans back into the chair. “Well, I mean there’s no easy way to say this, but Mariah and Amir have been messing around since we were in high school.”
Your stomach drops. 
That’s…..that’s not what you were expecting to hear.
In a whispered, pained voice, you ask, “what?”
He sighs and runs his hand over his face. “I don’t mean to get too personal, but I know it started around the time Amir was trying to pressure you into sleeping with him.” If not for the nature of the conversation, you’d find it a little adorable how he’s obviously trying his best to remain respectful. Kai has always been a genuinely decent guy. “He would constantly complain about you not ‘putting out’ around the locker room and during practice. And once he started hooking up with Mariah, he’d always brag about sleeping with the both of you.”
There’s so much to digest here. You’d figured Mariah and Amir were messing around after his slip around Christmas, but you figured it was a recent development. Now, you’re hearing that the girl you’ve considered a sister almost your whole life has been sleeping with the boy you once thought you loved from the very beginning?
“The times you couldn’t make it to parties, they’d be all over each other, but no one said anything because—”
“Because it was Amir,” you finish for him with a whisper. “He was the king of the school. No one would snitch on him, especially not his teammates.” You’re very familiar with the hierarchy and patriarchy of high school. You were the queen, just as much as he was the king, and everyone knew that you and Amir were always back and forth. They probably figured that you knew, or maybe they didn’t. You’re not so worried or stunned by just how many people knew and didn’t say anything. It doesn’t matter at this point.
What matters is that Mariah has always been a snake, a snake you brought around your child.
The child she got taken from you.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t say anything either—”
“No, don’t. You didn’t owe me anything.” It’s the two people who claimed to love and care about you who should have been honest. “I should apologize to you for dragging you into that bullshit. I’m really sorry, Kai. You didn’t deserve that.”
“We were kids, Y/N. Didn’t know any better.” Kai is clearly as uninterested in an apology from you as you are from him. “I’m sorry if this is too personal, but are you and Amir still….”
“No.” Just the thought alone nearly has you back to retching into the nearest toilet. “We were on and off friends with benefits since, well, high school. Outside of when I was with Callie’s dad for three years, but now Joe and I are back together. Have been for months.” There’s a small hint of excitement, the first non-sad emotion you’ve experienced in the past two days as you inform, “Callie and I will be moving to Florida to live with him.”
“Good.” Kai seems genuinely happy and pleased to hear this. “Hell, as a man, I can imagine he’d get you both on a plane out of here today if he could.” A small, sad chuckle leaves your mouth at his words. He’s probably not wrong. “You should have been left this place, Y/N. You deserve better. Always did. Get out of here and have a fresh start.”
The encouragement isn’t required but deeply appreciated. His openness and honesty provide you with a slither of relief. The information shared is something you’ll have to process at a later date and time, but it does answer some necessary questions you needed answered.
There’s no doubt in your mind at this point that leaving is absolutely what you need to do.
You just need to get through this nightmare first.
163 notes · View notes
grlsbstshot · 2 months ago
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NEON LIGHTS
Pairing (Original Characters): Jameson Lucas (Aaron Pierre) x Imani St. Cirie (Megan thee Stallion) Story Synopsis: 
R&B singer/songwriter, Jameson Lucas, is well known as a charming playboy. The latest in his line of ‘loved em and left em’ behavior? Imani St. Cirie, an emotive singer/songwriter herself. A common sense pulls them in opposite directions – friendships are tested, old flames resurface, and new opportunities threaten to tear them apart for good. In this industry, dreams can make or break you – but what happens when love becomes the gamble of a lifetime?
Chapter Synopsis: Jameson deals with being denied access to his heart's desire and flashes back to the start of their romance while Imani wrestles with her feelings present day. Warnings: Smut (18+), toxic relationship, possessiveness, profanity, usage of the n-word (if you're white and read it, you owe us $20), manual stimulation (fingering, okay?), dick size mention, dirty talk -- if we missed anything, let us know! Word Count: 5.3k // Divider Template: @cafekitsune Notes: The following characters are original creations. Their voice claims are Usher / Lucky Daye (Jameson) & Summer Walker / SZA (Imani). We have no affiliation to any of those artists.
There will be alternating POVs between our leads.
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CHAPTER II: Someone to Love
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he was blocked. jameson watched his repeated texts and calls go unanswered. the texts said delivered but never read. this was when he was supposed to decide if he was going to stick around for another round of bullshit with her. flashes of the night before came to mind...and he knew the answer was 'yes'. she was ignoring the fuck out of him but he knew imani loved him. she may be able to live without him...but she loved him. maybe that would be enough. "yo, are you listening to me?"
jameson blinked at his best friend, giving the man a blank stare. ellington dupree had been his friend and writing partner for damn near a decade. their connection was instant. where jameson was blessed with a wealthy and well-known mother, ellington had gotten it out the mud. he was a man that knew music inside out all his life. he had a work ethic that jameson envied. it was why he only produced music with ej -- they balanced each other out. where he allowed muse to take over, ej controlled the music. he didn't let it control him. even now, they were supposed to be working on a track from his new album but jameson couldn't seem to find his focus. all he did was wait for imani to call him back.
"yeah, i heard you." "then what i say?"
he gave ellington a glare before rising from his spot on the couch. "something about the horns." ellington tsked, kicking back in his chair before shaking his head. "i said that shit ten minutes ago, nigga. we on a whole nother track. what's up with you?"
jameson didn't answer -- instead he redirected his attention to his phone, texting imani again as he exited his friend's home studio. he heard ej calling his name but descended the stairs anyway.
he watched as another text went through and the message popped up delivered. jameson rolled his eyes, tossing his phone onto the couch as he stared at the ceiling with his hands on his hips. this girl was going drive him crazy.
"are you insane?" "i'm not in the mood right now, e." "yeah, no shit. but you need to get in the mood for something other than imani. YOU wanted to release this album at the top of the year. YOU said you were ready so they've already started promoting the shit."
he lifted his head to deny that he was stressing over imani but the realization hit him hard. "how the fuck you know i was texting mani?" jameson watched as ej rolled his eyes and made himself comfortable on the couch. "how the fuck wouldn't i know? you always get tense and weird over her. it's been a while since she had you fucked up like this though. what happened?"
jameson sighed, closing his eyes to avoid the look on his friend's face when he confessed the truth. he sat down opposite ej and leaned back onto the cushions.
"we fucked." "bullshit." "it's true." "WHEN?!" "last week." "i thought she was dating...what's that nigga name? the football nigga!" "they broke up two months ago." "how the fuck you know that?" jameson gave ej a look and avoided the obvious answer. "oh, you are insane." "it was random. we didn't plan that shit." "she probably didn't." "and what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" "fuck it sound like?"
his eyes opened as he frowned at ej. if anyone had seen how bad it could get between he and imani, it was ej. "i didn't go over there to have sex, man. i just...i wanted to see her. i've missed her all this time. i just couldn't take that shit anymore."
a flash of sympathy crossed his best friend's face but it disappeared within a moment. "don't do this, jamie. don't. you can't walk down this road with imani again."
ej was probably right, jameson knew that. but he also knew that he wasn't walking away from her again. he glanced over at the phone that he abandoned, willing it to ring or beep or something. anything to let him know she gave a shit. "can't help it." he murmured to his best friend. "i want her."
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this was the biggest night of his life...and he found that he didn't care. his gaze was stuck on a woman who had walked past him. none of this shit really mattered anymore. he wanted to know her. he had a tony award. he had two grammys already. he was nominated for another three that night but as he leaned over in his seat to watch her saunter down the rest of the aisle, jameson found himself smiling for entirely different reasons.
"i want her." he said bluntly. only ej acknowledged him. he said 'huh?' but his gaze followed her the same way jameson's had. 'ohhhh' was all he uttered, giving a laugh.
she had her back to them so he had no idea who the hell she was but he had the urge to. four awards from his own and he wasn't watching the stage. he wasn't talking to his collaborators or friends to the right of him. he was watching her. a couple of people rose to let her into her seat and jameson found himself doing the same. he stood to his feet, adjusting his tux's jacket as he made his way towards her.
ej called his name but he didn't respond. this was more important. he got to the aisle and dropped to his haunches, learning forward to catch her eye. he recognized her then. imani. there were people next to her who peered over at him in confusion but jameson's smile was only for her. 
"excuse me." he said softly, bracing his hands against the seat next to him. she looked at him, eyebrow quirked at his audacity to interrupt her conversation. "hi. i just...i'm sorry. i just wanted to come tell you something you already know. you're the most beautiful woman i've ever seen in my life."
if she recognized him or was impressed by his attention, it didn't show on her face. jameson watched her give a little laugh and haughtily respond. "thank you." she said. "how many other women have you used that on tonight?"
"none." he replied honestly. "i saw you and next thing i know, i'm over here practically on my knees to talk to you." jameson ignored the woman next to imani clearing her throat. it was a public conversation but he carried it on as if they were the only two in the room. free from a relationship that had lost it's fire, jameson hadn't been looking for anybody. he wanted to invest in his career again and after two hit albums -- it was time for something new. money, cars, clothes, and women had been his life since he was eighteen and old enough to spread the thighs of any and every woman in hollywood. he'd been over it. but this was important. getting this girl felt like it'd be life changing.
he leaned forward, offering the woman his hand. "i'm jameson." he surprised himself by giving his full name. often, he introduced himself as james. nobody actually in his life called him jameson but his mother. he had the urge to hear his name from her lips. "i know who you are, ms. imani st. cirie. future best new artist winner." her eyes lit up at the fact that he had recognized her. she hadn't topped the charts yet but he knew it was a matter of time. her music was raw. real. she touched people and he knew her time was coming.
when she took his hand, he brushed his thumb against the back of her fingertips. the people they had their hands stretched across didn't matter. hell, he had forgotten other people could hear them when she responded. "nice to meet you jameson." she said. "you can call me ms. st. cirie. your face looks so familiar. i just can't put my finger on it."
jameson laughed out loud -- loud enough that people on the aisle in front of them turned to identify the sound. he'd been famous from birth. paparazzi shots of him hanging off his mother's hip had been tagged in people magazine. pictures of them at the park. his high school yearbook had been blasted across myspace and twitter. and when he started making music himself? well, he became a teen heartthrob at 19. he didn't believe her but he liked that she didn't fall over him. "that's strange." he replied with a shrug, slowly grinning at her. "but since you can't remember, maybe this is your chance to get to know me...personally. i'll be honest, ms. st. cirie -- i'm dying to get to know you."
her gaze roamed his face but her lips curved into a smile. "and why should i do that?"
"i heard i'm a good time." "and this is where the line of women come in, yes?" "we're not talking about other women. we're talking about you and me, ms. st. cirie."
imani gave her friend a look and the friend automatically rose, shifting down a seat. her gaze came back to him and she nodded her head, wordlessly giving him approval to sit next to her. jameson rose from his position at the end of the aisle, ignoring the ache in his calves and thighs. he'd been squatting for so long but hadn't noticed it. all he saw was the fact that he was making strides towards what he wanted.
"you don't feel this thing between us?" he asked her curiously. somehow, he had sat without losing contact with her for longer than a few seconds. he switched the positioning, holding her hand in his right. she tsked, yanking her hand from his grasp and shook her head. "i don't feel anything. i just think you're funny."
jameson leaned towards her, keeping his voice low enough so that it would take others effort to eavesdrop on their conversation. "i could tell you shit you already know. that you're the most beautiful woman i've ever seen. that i want you so bad i don't really know what to do with myself. would that help? i want you. and from the way you look at me, i think you want me too. so what are we going to do about it?"
"that was a good line, jameson." "i'm not giving you lines. i'm trying to get you where you need to be." "need to be?" "definitely." "you so fucking cocky." "i got reason to be. ms. st. cirie...will you go out with me?" "you don't give up, do you?" "no. not easily."
he could tell that she liked that. despite giving him a hell of a lot of attitude, her fingers fidgeted nervously on her lap. she either liked him or didn't know how to say no. jameson reached for her hand again, gently stilling her fingertips. she didn't seem alarmed or afraid then. she relaxed before meeting his gaze.
"no pressure. i think you're beautiful. i admire your mind. your music. your talent. give me one chance to show you that." determined to not miss out on the good thing sitting right next to him, jameson did his best to show her he was serious...but he took a risk and lowered his head, pressing a kiss to her thumb -- the first contact between them that wasn't totally innocent.
his gaze flickered up to hers and he knew he had her. she went soft, leaning in as if she were going to let him kiss her -- but she remembered where they were. "And the Grammy for Best R&B Performance goes to...U Don't Have to Call! James Lucas!"
jameson didn't move from his seat. he didn't take his eyes off her. imani looked between him and the stage, expecting him to go up but he didn't. this was more important. eventually, ej got up. his best friend gave the speech that jameson likely would have given but he didn't hear the words. imani leaned closer so he could near her, whispering "okay. one date." against his ear.
jameson smiled, turning his head to offer imani a kiss. not even twenty minutes after meeting and he was going for it. he had always been an ambitious man. just as he hoped, she took him up on the offer. she leaned in and their lips met. it was brief but served as the spark that ignited their obsession with each other.
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it took two whole weeks for their schedules to line up. photoshoots, interviews, and a sudden trip to new york had kept him from what he really wanted. anticipation had been a bitch but they filled the time in between with texts and phone calls. he had discovered that imani was both smart and funny. she could make him burst out laughing over the smallest thing. she seemed to be a good person and that appealed to him. he seemed to really be into this girl. so much so that he browsed her instagram, constantly looking for things she liked. what flowers she enjoyed. people she liked having conversation with. knowing little things about her had spiraled into wanting to know everything about her. he was down so bad that ej had been disgusted when he walked into studio in the middle of the night and caught him giggling on the phone with her like a teenager.
finally, they got to see each other again. standing alone in the vastness of the getty museum, he and imani kept their fingertips intertwined. the only sounds were the soft echo of their footsteps on polished floors. The museum had been closed for the night, but the director had made an exception just for them — a private tour. No crowds, no distractions. Just the two of them and all the art they'd agreed to pretend they were paying attention to. jameson's kept straying to her. everything about her was mesmerizing. the way her hair fell into her eyes, the cute little way she'd snuggled into him when he hugged her when he met her outside. the sweet way she swung their hands as they walked. he was gone over this girl and didn't know what to do about it.
“so,” she said, breaking the silence with a teasing tone, “you go to museums all the time or is this just to impress me?”
he glanced around, his eyes glinting with amusement. “it's all for you. you got me stalking your instagram to see what you like. i saw you went to several museums around the world so..." he shrugged, looking at her to see she was surprised at what he'd said. “but what do you like?” she asked him. jameson laughed. "you." he answered easily enough.
she fell silent again as they continued on. the views of los angeles almost as magnificent as the art. they entered a gallery that seemed to be a study in light and shadow, with large, dramatic sculptures. he was comfortable even in the silence with her. felt like they were the only people in the world, the art surrounding them like a secret they were sharing, just the two of them.
“i think i like you too.” imani said softly. her tone didn't hold the same teasing as before. she was serious. jameson dipped his head to get a good look at her and stopped walking to face her. "why do you sound so sad when you say that?"
"because i don't know if i can trust you." imani said softly. jameson couldn't promise to be the picture of fidelity. he'd cheated once before in a relationship but that didn't seem to be the best thing to say to a woman you wanted to be with. "you can trust how i feel about you. i swear -- i have never felt like this in my life. you got me kicking my feet and twirling my hair and shit, girl. i got it bad." she gave him a short laugh, shaking her head, but he was pleased to see her smile again. "you gave me a chance for a date now give me a chance to show you that i want to be your man."
"my man? you moving kind of fast, ain't you?" "hell yeah. i'm trying to lock you down before a billionaire prince pull up on you out of nowhere." "you can't compete with a billionaire?" "absolutely not. i can't buy you a private island." "then what good are you?" "i can sing. i'm good looking. i give good dick. which reason work for you?"
"boy, bye!" imani pulled away, laughing abruptly as she waved him off. jameson followed closely, not wanting her to go too far from him. "where you going?" he asked her, holding on to her hand. imani snorted, pointing at the art across the room. "over there because you playing!" jameson's laughter echoed through the space and joined hers as she tried to shake him off. "nahhhh. come play with me over here."
her smile deepened, a challenge flickering in her eyes. "i'll play with you later." jameson stepped closer to her, pulling her close. "i'ma hold you to that." even in heels, she stood a few inches shorter than he was. he couldn't get over how fucking beautiful she was. pretty ass dark brown eyes. pretty ass nose that lead down to full, gorgeous lips. he couldn't even think about her body. he liked everything about this girl and acting like he didn't wasn't possible.
his hand moved to the small of her back, fingertips splayed as he kept her body against his. "you hungry?" imani nodded her head, her hands braced against his shoulders. jameson moved them side to side, swaying even though there was no music playing. "i got you. let me take care of you."
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they ate dinner in the museum, specially made by a private chef --totally surrounded by art. jameson was pleased to see that she was excited. he was just as giddy. imani sat on his lap as they traded stories about work, their inspirations, and what they each wanted out of a relationship. they found they had several things in common -- big things and little things. family relationships, foods, even their favorite Disney movie. it was all the same. jameson wasn't the type to believe in love at first sight but he really did start to wonder if god put this woman in his life for a reason.
they left holding hands. he let her slide into his benz, intent on driving her home to complete an evening of being the perfect gentleman. the drive to her malibu home was filled with jokes, conversation, and singing along to songs on the radio. the tension between them remained but it was joined by comfort. they were truly starting to understand each other.
by the time they arrived to her place, he had made up his mind. he was going to give it all he had. he liked imani st. cirie -- and hopefully, she liked him too.
the warmth of the car enveloped them as jameson slid to a stop in front of her home. the chemistry between them made saying goodbye difficult. he didn't want to say goodnight to her. jameson turned the car off, attempting to gather his thoughts. he didn't want the last thing he said to her to be stupid. when he turned to say something -- he found imani was already staring.
it was like they moved at the same time. he unbuckled his seatbelt and before he could say a word, she had done the same. the world outside faded away as he damn near crowded her in the passenger seat. he could feel her heart race, each beat echoing in his head. he leaned in, their lips meeting briefly, before he heard her panting.
the kiss was soft at first, tentative, as if they were both savoring the sweetness of their new attraction. But soon, it deepened—hunger replaced hesitation. their lips moved in a rhythm that felt both familiar and foreign, pulling them deeper into each other's orbit.
imani moaned as his tongue found hers and jameson couldn't believe how good it sounded. he placed his hand against her thigh, grasping tightly as if he could pull her any closer. the middle console kept them further apart than he wanted them to be. when her hand came down and pulled his fingers higher up her thigh, jameson didn't hesitate.
her hands framed his face, thumb gently brushing his cheek as they kissed. his hand moved further up her thigh, brushing against the silk fabric of her dress. when the pad of his thumb brushed against her panties, she gasped.
it felt like an eternity before she caught her breath and gave him a quick moan. with expertise, jameson swept her underwear aside and pressed his thumb between her folds. she was already wet and made it easy for him to wedge his finger into her. imani's lips parted in surprise when he pressed against her. jameson took the opportunity to bite her lower lip -- brushing his tongue against it as her thighs tightened around his hand.
"i can't make you moan like that again if you don't keep your legs open. let me in." he whispered when he released her lip, pleased when imani immediately opened her legs for him. she reached down and pulled her dress higher, hips rising from the seat as she did so. he caught a flash of the thongs she wore as she pressed her ass to his leather seats.
they were both breathless, not taking the time to go inside her house or even move to the back seat. imani reached for him again, pulling his head across the space and kissing him deeply as jameson's hand went right back between her legs. she whimpered and moaned as he played with her clit -- teasing them both by thumbing and then circling the sensitive spot. by the time she was whining against his mouth, his dick was hard.
to his surprise, imani reached across the seat and placed her hand in his lap. the surprise spurred his fingers forward. his index and middle finger were soaking in her wetness as his thumb tapped her clit. imani's head fell back as he hissed, breaking the kiss to shake his head. "let me focus on you."
mani didn't pull her hand away. instead, she grasped his dick -- squeezing gently as her hips rocked onto his fingers. they slid in and out effortlessly. jameson twisted and delved deeply, pulling a variety of noises from the back of imani's throat. "she talkin' to me, mani." he prompted her. she groaned, riding his hand as quickly as she could. "you hear her? i bet i can make her talk some more."
the squelching and squishing echoed through the car. his palm and other fingers were soaked as the wetness ran down his hand. imani nodded her head, breath catching in her throat as he twisted his fingers and looked for that spot -- that one spot that he knew would have her screeching within the confines of his car. when he found it, she froze -- her whole body slumping back against the seat. "yes! y-yeah. just like that." she cried. jameson followed her, watching her face as he picked up the pace. he spread her juices across her clit with his thumb. when she shut her legs around his hand again, he used his free hand to grasp her thigh. "don't run from it. let me have it."
there he was, leaning over the center console, doing his best to make her cum less than an hour after their first date had ended. he kissed her lips gently, moaning with her as she shuddered. "i--i'm--cum" she whispered, words escaping her as she struggled to give him just three. "i know, baby. i feel it. let go. i got you."
jameson nodded, licking his tongue against her quivering lips. she opened her mouth for more and he sucked her tongue into his mouth, kissing her deeply as imani came around his fingers. she squeezed him tightly but he didn't stop. those two fingers kept thrusting, thumb kept flicking at her clit until she squirmed out of his grasp. her hand moving from his lap to grasp at his wrist. he was hard as fuck, eight and a half inches practically throbbing in his boxer briefs as he tried not to nut on himself.
he forced himself to slow down then -- pleased when she whimpered and asked for more kisses. jameson supplied them happily, stroking her insides with his fingers to calm her down. when she was sated and humming happily against his mouth, he pulled his hand back. they watched each other for a moment -- imani blinked at him as he licked his fingers clean.
jameson's gaze swept down her body as if he wanted to remember her just like that -- legs open, panties pushed aside, pussy wet and satisfied from his efforts. once his hand was 'clean', jameson reached over again and righted her clothing. imani still hadn't said a word. even when he opened his door to get out of the car. when he opened her door, he offered her his hand -- the same one he'd used to get her off.
imani took it and exited the car. she didn't seem to be in a daze anymore. "this was...a wonderful date." she told him softly. "i wonder what you'll come up with next time." before jameson could say a word, she pressed her hand to his chest and lifted her head to give him a kiss. he accepted it happily, greedily even. they stood like that for a moment, kissing on the sidewalk. his arms wrapped around her waist, fingertips finding their way to that delicious ass. jameson squeezed briefly and imani broke the kiss. "call me." she told him with a smirk before walking away.
he didn't know if she smirked because she could feel how hard his dick was when she kissed him or if she knew that he was going to call her as soon as he got in the car. either way -- he was pretty sure that this girl was going to be the death of him.
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her best friend sat across the room, sketching designs for her portfolio. if she wasn't so distracted, she would have noticed imani scrolling through her texts. she had unblocked jameson and found a flurry of text messages.
how are you? i miss you. can we talk? baby, i think we need sit down and talk this shit out. i love you, imani. i'm not fighting it anymore. please call me
how is it that he made her want to forgive him? it was like when they were talking or when he was in front of her -- she forgot the horrible shit he had done. she forgot the affair, she forgot the way he confessed. she forgot the way he only seemed to give his all when he felt like she was moving on from him. she hated the way he infiltrated her mind when she was with someone new. it seemed like she was doomed to keep falling for jameson -- and the thought scared her.
"just do it. you know you want to."
imani's gaze shot up from the phone to see genie peering over at her from her drawing table. despite being gorgeous enough to be a model, genie adesanya preferred to design the clothes. her curls were pinned to the top of her head and the glasses she wore were circular -- making her eyes appear even larger and more adorable.
she was southern by birth but her father was a lakers legend. a jersey-hanging-in-the-rafters-at-staples-center kind of legend. everybody loved genie. even jameson. she and he had practically been raised together when his mother and her father spent a few years dating but ultimately decided to remain friends. as close as they were, once imani stepped onto the scene -- she and genie became best friends. she took her side over jameson's. always. despite being total opposites persona wise, nobody understood imani better than genie did.
"he's blocked so i do not want to do anything." imani retorted, wrinkling her nose at her friend. she didn't bother to deny that they weren't talking about jameson.
genie got up from her drawing desk, smiling at imani as she made her way across the room and bounced down onto her friend's lap. imani quickly shoved her off with a snort and the two ended up slap boxing each other. "don't lie to me, girl!" genie yelled at her, avoiding imani's hands as she rolled off the couch and onto the floor. "you've been moping and sighing around here all week. you hiding from him?"
of course she was. jameson knew where genie lived but imani hoped that if he approached her there, genie wouldn't let them sneak off together. she was sick of falling into the same pattern with him. fight, break up, fuck, fall in love again. wash, rinse, and repeat. "i'm tired of this shit with him, genie." imani admitted, sighing softly.
genie sat up and pat her hand against imani's. "i know. but...the heart wants what it wants, mani. i'm not saying you should listen to me. i'm bad at love. I've made so many mistakes. but i can see what you really want. i know you. it's why i know jameson has lived in your head rent free for years, girl. and you live in his. i'm not saying you gotta trust him immediately. just -- just text him back. maybe it's a mistake but what if it isn't? what if y'all get it right this time?"
a true romantic at heart, imani admired genie's belief in love. she just wasn't sure she trusted it. she remained silent as genie gave her time to process. she returned to her drawing table, picking up the pencil and finishing her sketches in silence.
imani fiddled with her phone for a moment before groaning out loud. if this man broke her heart again, she was going to fucking kill him.
[ imani ] : what are you doing next week? [ blockdt unless horny ] : nothing. you want me? [ imani ] : i guess we can talk then. [ blockdt unless horny ] : why wait until then? wya? i can come there. [ imani ] : i'm at genie's but don't come here. [ blockdt unless horny ] : why not? [ imani ] : i need a minute, jamie. i didn't expect this and i don't know if this is the right decision for me. [ blockdt unless horny ] : i understand. i do. but baby, you and me have something. i fucked it up before but i'm not gonna fuck it again. i can't lose it twice. [ imani ] : we can talk about it next week. [ blockdt unless horny ] : okay. what day? [ imani ] : Thursday. i'll be back from Italy then. [ jamie ] : i already miss you. [ imani ] : i'll miss you too 🙄 [ jamie ] : lmfao i'll take that. i'ma do right this time, mani. i swear on my life. [ imani ] : we'll see. [ jamie ] : yes, we will. i try not to make mistakes but when i do, i only make them once. i'll be the man you deserve. i promise. [ imani ] : i really want to believe you [ jamie ] : we can start there, baby. that's a start.
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megamindsecretlair · 1 year ago
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Sunshine
Pairing: Tyrone x Black!Fem!reader / Plus Size reader
Warnings: 18+. Minors DNI., multiple uses of n-word and derogatory names. You are in charge of your own reading experience! Intentional use of AAVE. Porn without plot. Cursing, PIV, oral (both male and fem receiving), derogatory language, possession kink, size kink, all consensual.
Summary: At a house party, you meet Tyrone. Common sense flies out the window as you two sneak off for some fun.
Word Count: 2,462k
A/N: I...I have no excuses for myself. And I debated on posting this or not. But I've been feral since the movie came out and I've been gobbling up all the fics I can find. Just wanted to contribute. Of course Fontaine is fine, but I'm a West Coast girlie. Likes are awesome. Please consider commenting and reblogging to help support writers. If you're not Black, please don't reblog.
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You bent over to get a tequila soda from the cooler when you felt a presence next to you. You looked up and it took everything in you not to drop your jaw. The man was gorgeous. Beautiful dark skin, thick with two C’s, and a wide smile. He licked them big, juicy lips and smirked at you.
He tugged on one of your braids. “You too good to be hanging around here,” he said. Oh god, his voice was fine too. No, he was dangerous. But you couldn’t make your legs move away.
“What you talkin’ about?” You managed to ask.
“You one of them good girls that always got her nose in a book,” he said. He sipped whatever was in his cup. From the faint smell of it, it was probably Henny. It always was. 
You laughed and shook your head. “I know you’re not talking about stereotypes.” You pointed to his outfit and then pointed to a group of guys on the other side of the cooler. They all wore Khaki dickie shorts, high black socks, Chucks, and a sweatshirt or flannel. He noticed and chuckled. 
“It’s comfortable,” he said. He took in your outfit: a short, blue summer dress and sandals. But the way he took the time to peruse you, study you, had you drinking out of your cup to avoid smiling like an idiot.
“Whatever. And what’s so wrong with having my nose in a book?” 
“You too pure to hang around some hood niggas. Probably like them crew cut muthafuckas, right?” 
You laughed and shook your head. If only he knew…the hundreds, if not thousands at this point, pages of smut you inhaled on a weekly basis. “Definitely not. What other stereotypes you got for me?” 
“You got a curfew, don’t you? Some nice nigga in your DMs askin’ to take you out,” he continued. 
A few other people at the house party moved over to grab drinks. You moved out of their way, moving closer to him. Damn, he smelled so damn good. The right mix of clean soap and cologne. He wasn’t the type to take a bath in it.
“Wrong, wrong, and wrong,” you said. He tugged on your braid again. You scrunched up your face, pretending to be upset. He grinned. 
“I’m Tyrone,” he said. He held out his hand.
You introduced yourself and took his hand. He shook it but refused to let go. Instead he pulled you closer and kissed your cheek. 
“I got to worry about someone comin’ to fight me over your pretty ass?” He asked. 
“No!” You said with a laugh. 
“Good, because I ain’t trynna catch a body over you,” he whispered in your ear, sending shivers from the top of your head to the tip of your toes. Murder was not a sexy subject. And yet…
“Now sir, who said I even want to entertain you?” You asked. You sipped your drink. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of his. 
He smirked and leaned in again. “Bet. Let me see them panties, then,” he said. He studied your body: your thick thighs, tummy, and chubby cheeks.
Shit. You laughed and ran your tongue over your teeth. There was a damp spot in your panties growing by the second. You desired this man. You were actively lusting after him. Everything in your head told you to walk away. He was trouble with a capital T. A verified hood nigga. 
You grinned and took his hand, weaving in and out of people grinding on the dance floor. Tupac and Dre blasted through the speakers. Red solo cups were high in the air as people showed out. 
You caught the eye of your best friend and waved. She noticed that you were holding Tyrone’s hand and she grinned, tapping her fist against the wall she leaned on. A man stood beside her with his hand on her waist. Both of ya’ll wasn’t making it home early tonight. 
You tugged Tyrone towards the stairs. Everyone had converged into the basement with the strict promise not to disturb upstairs. That was already out of the window as multiple people were on the first level making out. But you wanted to do more than make out.
You pulled him deeper into the house, heading towards an empty bedroom. You checked the room and there was no one in it. Tyrone pushed you in and locked the door behind him. He turned on the light and grinned at you.
“Not so good, are you?” He asked. He pulled you closer. His warm hands circled your waist and pulled you flush against him, you could feel his thick cock against your thigh.
“Oh shit,” you gasped. 
He chuckled. “You tappin’ out?” He asked. 
Fresh arousal gushed out of you and you bit back a moan. “I want you,” you said. Your body was on fire from how much you wanted him. 
As if that’s what he was waiting on, he crashed his lips against yours. His sexy brown lips kissed and sucked your bottom lip. He pushed his tongue inside. You tasted the Henny on his breath and moaned. You grabbed onto the sleeves of his flannel, needing something to hold on to.
He pushed you backwards as he continued to kiss you. The back of your legs hit the bed. Instead of pushing you on to it, he turned you around.
“Knees, pretty girl,” he said. 
You dropped instantly. He chuckled as he looked down at you. He ran a hand over his jaw. “You always listen that well?” He asked.
“Only when I want to,” you said and grinned. 
He took off his flannel and black T-shirt and removed his black tank. He worked at his belt, loosening it and pulling the zipper down. His dick sprang free with a light little bounce. You licked your lips.
Dicks were not pretty. Full stop. However, his was gorgeous. It was long and girthy and curved a little bit. The more you stared, the harder he seemed to get. He pumped himself a few times and tapped your lips with it. Precum painted a coat on your lips and you licked it up. 
“Let’s see how good you are,” he said. 
He sat on the bed and you scooted closer, looking at him while you lowered your mouth. You took the tip in first, getting used to the salty taste of him. You flattened your tongue and swirled it around. 
“Stop playin’ and get to work,” he said. You giggled and really got to work. If he wanted to think you were a goody two-shoes, then so be it.
You sucked him in and got to work. You played with his dripping cock. You used both hands to twist as you sucked. Spit ran down his dick and you gathered it up with your fingers to properly lube him up.
“Oh, fuck,” he said. You saw his eyes widen and roll towards the ceiling. He grabbed the back of your head and pushed you down further. You gagged a few times but kept going, licking his fat tip.
“Damn bitch,” he groaned. “Help me bust this nut and I’ll take good care of you.” 
You kept sucking and added more pressure. He jerked a few times. With no warning, hot splashes of cum hit the back of your throat. You swallowed it all and licked the corner of your mouth to catch the rest.
He panted as he watched you do it and his eyes grew darker. “Bed.” 
You stood up, feeling your wetness between your thighs. You walked over to the bed. Before you sat down, he kissed you and bit your lip. “You’re mine.”
You sighed and your pussy clenched around nothing. Those two words were almost enough to undo you. He gripped your hips roughly and pulled at your dress until it was on the floor next to his clothes. Your panties came next. He rubbed it between his fingers once it was off of you.
“And I’m keeping these too.”
“No, you’re not. Those are mine.” The sharp smack to your ass was heard before it was felt. Stinging pain blossomed on your meaty ass. 
You cried out and he did it again. He smacked you a few more times before you were pushing your ass against him for more. He chuckled. When it was clear he wasn’t going to smack you again, you climbed into the bed but you were moving too slow for him. He grabbed your legs and flipped you over like a pancake. Then he yanked you until half your ass was hanging off of the bed.
He knelt down slowly and spread your legs the farthest he could get them. “Pretty fuckin’ pussy too. Yeah, all of this is mine,” he said. His breath fanned over your exposed pussy making you shake.
“You can’t own pussy, nigga,” you said.
This muthafucka bit your thigh. You yelled out. He bit your other thigh, harder. “I’m ‘bout to write my name on it.”
You wanted to argue. As much as you wanted this fool, there was no way in hell…
“Oh god.” You had no breath left in your lungs. Your entire body froze as his tongue began to play with your clit. He lapped up your juices and inhaled it. He ate it like a starving man. Like a nigga just released from jail. 
You began to move away. It was too much and too intense. You pushed at his hands. His tongue dived into your pussy and you moaned and screamed. He locked his arms around your thighs and held you open for him to devour.
As his tongue fucked you, one of his thumbs pressed into your clit. You slapped at his hand. “I’m not stoppin’ so quit that shit,” he growled. You locked eyes with him. His mouth and jaw was covered with your juices. A mix of drool and your arousal dripped from his lips. He licked those same lips as he stared you down. 
You nodded. He went back to eating you out like it was his full time job. He suckled and flicked at your clit. He rubbed his nose in it. Your belly tightened as your orgasm rose up inside of you quicker than it had ever come. You tossed your head back onto the bed as you screamed your release out. He kept eating you out through it.
As you came down, you twitched as he licked one last time. You stared at the ceiling questioning your life’s choices to bring you to this moment. Tyrone chuckled as he cleaned his face off with his tank. 
“You think I’m done with you, bitch?” He asked.
The only thing you could do was half grunt and half laugh. No man was allowed to call you a bitch. And he’s done it twice now and you ain’t even mad.
He helped you sit up further on the bed. Then he laid on top of you, pulling you by the chin to kiss. His tongue swiped against yours in a deep, nasty kiss. As if he wanted you to taste what he did. You tasted yourself on his tongue and it had you moaning and seeking more.
He leaned up on his knees and pumped his dick. “This gon’ hurt, but you’ll be alright.” 
He grabbed your knees and pushed them down against the bed. He ran his thick cock over your clit and gathered up as much lubrication as he could. He slid the tip in and you moaned. “Fuck, Tyrone!” 
He leaned down and kissed you. “My name sounds pretty on your lips. Say it again.”
You refused. There was still an ounce of defiance in you. He slid in some more, stretching you. 
“Shit, shit, shit.” It stung but it also felt too good to tell him to stop. He kissed you again. “Say it.”
“Tyrone, please…” you begged. He kissed you again. “That’s my bitch.”
He kept going. Inch by delicious inch until he bottomed out. He held himself off of you as you adjusted to the sheer size of him. He was easily the biggest you had ever taken and you worried that you would never want anything else. How could anyone compare after that?
He trailed kisses along your jaw and the corner of your mouth. He whispered how pretty you were and how you were his. “So fuckin’ pretty takin’ this dick.”
He kissed and nibbled on your neck until you began to relax. Then, he started moving. He pulled out and then went back in just as slowly. Nigga was a professional at this shit.
As you relaxed and got back to moaning and crying, he sped up his thrusts. “Shit, this pussy feel so good.” He looked down at himself sliding in and out of you. Your arousal gushed out of you, spilling down your ass cheeks. 
He twisted his hips and hit a spot deep inside you. “Oh fuck!” Your hips bucked off the bed. You grabbed at the sheets beneath you. 
“That’s it.” He chuckled as he kept hitting that spot, over and over. One hand gripped your leg to keep you open for him. His other hand pressed down on your belly. The added pressure had you seeing stars.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you stuttered as your second orgasm steamrolled through you. He kept driving into you. 
“Tyrone…” you warned. Though you didn’t know what for. You didn’t want him to stop. Your body felt like it was both buried underground and six feet in the air. Your legs ached from him holding you open but even that managed to feel good.
“You can give me one more,” he said.
“What?” You asked pathetically. Ain’t no fuckin’ way. 
“I want one more,” he growled. He kept pushing his thick cock into you. You tried to speak. To communicate that there was no way you could. 
He only smirked at you. His cornrows were damp with sweat. He quickened his pace and moved his hand from your stomach. His thumb played with your clit.
“Oh, shit, wait,” you moaned. 
“Ain’t no wait. Give me that shit,” he said. In no time at all, you were coming again and squeezing the hell out of his dick. He moaned and panted before pounding into you. He came on a hoarse moan, pushing so deep into you he probably did leave his name there. 
Hot ropes of cum squirted inside of you, painting every inch of wall he could find. He dropped his weight on you as you panted together.
He kissed your cheek. “Goddamn, bitch. I’m never letting you go.” 
You chuckled. Because you weren’t letting his ass go neither.
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theespeakerboxxx · 4 months ago
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i'm gonna touch up on the whole sai wigga thing too while im here cuz why not
i've been seeing a boatload of lily riders who aren't black themselves call sai a racist. by saying she said nigga? but when you pull up the receipts, it's just wigga.
you can really tell some of these people aren't black too because they use the term "POC" which is a friendly way of saying "colored people" like its the 1950s all over again lmao, just say black or brown!
black people aren't a monolith and we all don't agree on the same thing, but i'm sure it's common sense to know that "wigga" isn't a slur, but a derogatory term to white people. take it the same way we say white trash and etc, but just for white ppl that wanna be black.
wigga and nigga aren't the same thing, not by a long shot. the n is just replaced with a w. instead of being a slur directed towards black people, its flipped around on being a hilarious derogatory term towards white people. now if sai really did say what people said she did, that'd be a whole new story
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iirc, sai was called a wigga by a black person for saying homie...
a lot of ebonics has been adopted by white youth over the years, which is sad to say but thats the way language works. so a white person saying homie isn't really wigga behavior. a better example would be what was said in the definition, like perpetuating stereotypes of black people and or attempting to look like them in an outlandish way.
go on tiktok or any popular social media platform and you'll be having white kids butcher words like "gyatt" , "ahh," and "unc". i wouldn't say they're wiggas (unless they're trying to be) but thats just the hot new buzzwords trending for them.
while i don't agree with sai on some things, twisting the narrative by saying she's a full blown racist is craaaazy. especially when lily herself does brownface and has a pretty obvious fetish for black and brown women. if anything lily slightly fits into the wigga definition by dousing herself in bronzer like she's woah vicky
if these people really cared about racism they'd be more active in anti-racism causes, no? they also wouldn't be near lily with a 50 foot pole.
if you're one of these people pretending to be progressive, please turn the computer off and educate yourself on what it truly means to be racist. pick up a historical book or even read some articles. half of y'all on here sound like dr umar
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bonefall · 1 year ago
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“I like watching him get tangled up in his own web of self-pity, raising a superiority complex AND an inferiority complex at the same time.”
THAT NIGGA HAS BPD!!,! 🫵
ohSHIT... I didn't REALIZE
Oh noooo is that why I like him so much? Did I read BPD into Nightheart and attach myself like a limpet?? Oh god it makes sense now OTL
I was even planning for him to eventually find out he has a LOT in common with Squilf who I already decided has BPD in BB because I love her so much, is that what I was picking up on subconsciously?
AND BRAMBLESTAR IS A MUTUAL ABUSER OUGHHH... she probably recognizes him using the same tactics on Nightheart that used to work on her! Oh god oh fuck!
LISTEN; I don't rewrite arcs until they're done, so, don't take any of this as canon to BB yet, but... maybe a change I should really anticipate is changing HOW Bramblestar steps down.
I think it would work well with the themes of BB for it to not be his choice, but a... "gentle rebellion." Squirrelflight, Sparkpelt, all of the Firekin, Twigbranch, everyone who has been harmed by Bramblestar confronting him as a group and telling him what's going to happen next.
"You're going to step down. You won't be talking to Nightheart anymore. Enough is enough, Bramblestar."
"So this is how it ends?? This is how you treat me? ...this is what you've felt, all along? I've given EVERYTHING to this Clan, since--"
Just starts ranting, his voice rising in volume, lurches up out of his nest and tries to tower over everyone to make them cower.
They don't budge.
Sparkpelt is eye-level with him, just as big as her father. When he catches her gaze, he doesn't see his daughter's eyes. He sees Jessy, just before she left.
And she sees a child throwing a tantrum.
"Enough is enough."
He does not take the lesson she meant from this. He just hears his traitor of a deputy, his witch of an ex-mate, with her words in his daughter's mouth. He doesn't regret the real reasons; he regrets allowing Squirrelflight to mentor his kit.
And he claps that anger onto Squilf; "StarClan will be the judge of you."
A year ago, she would have been terrified of that. But God is hard to fear when you've been plucked from the heavens and seen his angels die.
"Ok. Anyway,"
then she delves into some boring legal stuff like how he won't sleep with the other elders, the logistics of making this official, going to the Moonpool with a witness, etc etc etc
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blackdragoness · 2 months ago
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❌COLLECTIVE READING❌
Keywords: Undercover fan club. Praise. Cheering and chanting your name. Snakes in the grass. Audience. Fakes and Fans. Enemies lurking. Jealousy. Rage. Anxiety. Press press pressed! Paparazzi. Heavy independence. Tribe. Safety. Zen.
Channeled song: Unbothered by Tori Kelly
Y’all got people all up in their emotions and all in their heads over you!!! What did y’all do!!! 🤣🤣 This shit is straight comedy though.
So the message I’m getting is people are making fools out of themselves because of the uncontrollable emotions you have caused within them. I’m hearing that you’re not doing any of this intentionally. You’re literally minding your gahdamn business and focusing on yourself and it’s causing an uproar of emotions in people.
There’s someone in particular feeling intense jealousy and rage towards you. This person is upset that they cannot get one over on you. They want power and control over you and are working overtime to try to dominate you but it’s backfiring so bad! This person is typically very persuasive and gets their way with everyone but they cannot seem to get a grasp over you. They are losing their self control and common sense and I feel severe second hand embarrassment for them. They are losing sleep at night thinking about you and stewing in their own jealousy over you. The truth is this person wishes to have the life you have built for yourself. This person is working overtime to destiny swap with you. But hunny, what’s meant for you is meant for you and you only. Can’t nobody take that away from you no matter how hard they try. I’m hearing “EXPOSURE”. Someone is exposing themselves in front of you unconsciously and it’s on display for many to see? This exposure is going to be confirmation of your true character. I’m sensing that this very jealous person has tried to tear your reputation down to many and it’s being exposed without you doing anything. People are seeing this persons true colors and they are losing respect and loyalty for them.
I don’t see this person changing anytime soon but I’m hearing “this bitch is a clown”. So a lot of you guys are unbothered AF when it comes to this energy. You ain’t losing a minute of sleep over this clown. You ain’t worried about this individual so when they start to get exposed in front of you, I see it being entertaining AF for you. I love this vibe.
Besides this negative person, you have an undercover fan club who love and adore everything about you! These people speak so highly of you and will go to bat for you no matter the time of day or situation. You have found your tribe and your circle of loyal members who have become your safety net. You will always be safe and protected.
“Fake niggas mad, snakes / Snakes in the grass, let a nigga know that he arrived”
- Love Yours by J Cole
Whoever I am speaking to, you have a very rich destiny in store for you in this lifetime. This will cause lots of enemies to pop up out of the wood works. You know you at the top when all the snakes start coming out and exposing themselves. Pay none of these bitches any mind. You are THAT girl/boy.
Let em talk, let em keep watching 😈 sit back, eat some popcorn and enjoy the shit show these clowns have put on for you.
Keep shining boo, and let the haters do they thang.
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beautifulpersonpeach · 1 year ago
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Lmao I’m sorry but Taehyung is a bit stupid. Scratch that, he’s very stupid. Who comes online to do a 5 mins live and the only thing he makes sure to do is show himself lip syncing “nigga”? I know he didn’t think much of it in the sense of mouthing it, he probably feels that because he didn’t voice out the word, he gets a pass. But that’s really not how this works. Least of all in fuck ass 2023. This is nothing like any of the recent ‘controversies’ for the guys by the way. No, this is an instance of Taehyung doing something ignorant in some misguided bid to show he listens to hiphop with ‘bad words’, perhaps he thought it made him look cool to be able to ‘sing along’ to it, maybe it’s possible he genuinely didn’t think it was wrong or a big deal, but all he’s done is jeopardize his debut for no reason, with his own hands.
It’s a vanity fuck up.
Whether or not this turns out to be a shitshow, I hope someone educates him ASAP on what the hell he’s just done. I understand that in Korea, it’s very common for men to engage with hiphop in this way. Unfortunately. But this just isn’t a ‘mistake’ he or any of the guys can afford to keep making. He’s been exposed to too much to remain this clueless. It’s just disappointing.
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multifandomslxt · 1 year ago
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Nigga ion know who tf u getting attitude with, all I said what that people aren't obligated to like wayv. If you're saying they're underappreciated you obviously want more people to love them, but you aren't gonna force anyone to do shit! Did you use common sense? It could be 2030 and imma still piss u off, be fucking literal. Got me fucked up,😭😭
Why ask a stupid question? I’m obviously replying to you.
To appreciate someone and to love someone are two different things btw.
To appreciate is to acknowledge . Am I throwing stones at you and demanding you like them? No
Therefore I’m not forcing anybody to do shit.
If you don’t like them that’s fine, do you.
But you saying i can’t force anybody to love them has absolutely NOTHING to do with what I said. All you did was twist my words and misinterpret the message.
“Did you use common sense?” I’m glad you’re asking yourself important questions because it seems you still don’t get what’s going on here.
Also if you sent the previous ask without hostility I do apologize for replying in that manner.
However, if you intended to be hostile…
I said what I said.
That is all.
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lunityviruss · 1 year ago
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I think if you can’t boycott something you’re pathetic. And I think that if you come online wailing about it and centering yourself and victimizing yourself you’re even more pathetic. I keep thinking about this one stupid ass TikTok comment that has been plaguing my mind nonstop for a week now. “Oh I have autism and ARFID I need McDonald’s what do you expect me to do starve??” I expect you to shut the fuck up about it and eat your food in silence. No one has a gun to your head or is constantly recording who goes in and out the places we boycott so we can jump ‘em. Common sense or basic fucking thinking would’ve told you that this is clearly not about you. Unless you’re flexing what your buying I swear no one gives a shit, just tell a nigga “Hey I have this eating problem I’m real sensitive to certain foods and this so happens to be one of my safe foods. I’m well aware of the news and unfortunately this is the only thing I am able to eat at the moment.” AND KEEP IT PUSHING NIGGHA 🗣️
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nightguide · 3 months ago
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IF YOU'RE LEARNING ASTROLOGY (NEW), YOU MADE IT THIS FAR THAT I HAVE YOUR METHODS THOUGHT OUT TRULY WELL AND BELIEVED BUT YOUR MEMORY (OLD OR NOT) STILL HAVE TO KEEP UP THE APPEARANCES WHEN LOOKING AT YOUR LIFE DIFFERENTLY, SO IT'S A HEADS UP ON VOCATIONAL (CONTINUING) MEMBERS THAT ARE AFFECTED MY MEMORY INTUITION (ALZHEIMERS)
SO HERE IS WHERE YOU KNOW ME AS A PERSON (IF YOU KNEW MY TWITTER STATUS)
RISING IS THE SAME AS SUN BUT DIFFERENTIATING IT BY VISIBILITY MAKES THE ENERGY AS COMMON TO WHAT THEY DO BUT THEY DON'T WANT TO..... AND THAT'S WHY YOU SHOULD ALWAYS TRUST ON YOUR ALGORITHM LOGIC WHEN YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A DOCTOR, CUZ IN EVERY SINGLE WAY I AM.
ARIES RISING + LIBRA RISING
ARIES RISING = LEVEL HEADED, FIERY, IMAGINATIVE, HEART-FELT, PASSIONATE PEOPLE YOU'LL NEVER MEET, WHAT EVERYBODY THINKS OF CHAPPELL ROAN, STARGAZERS, THE CUTEST PEOPLE ALIVE, HEARTBROKEN MEN, 80'S MOVIE FORGIVING YOU, THE REASON THE WORLD EXISTS CUZ THEY AMPLIFY THE WORD 'YOU' LIKE THEY INVENTED IT BUT THEY ARE LIKE SAYING IT TO YOU THAT THEY NEVER INVENTED IT (BEING)
LIBRA RISING = HEARTBROKEN BUT NEVER ALONE, SOMEBODY'S BEST FRIEND ENERGY, LEE PACE, GOD BROKE THEM FIRST SO WHY BOTHER TRYING A LITTLE HARDER,GEN-Z'S HUMOUR, RUBY ROSE IF YOU LOOKED AT HER FIRST AND THOUGHT 'SCARY' CUZ SHE IS THE PARTY BUT YOU DON'T KNOW HER THAT WELL FROM PUBLIC GLANCE, (SOMEBODY)
2. TAURUS RISING + SCORPIO RISING
TAURUS RISING = ENIGMATIC, SOCIAL FCK BOI, WONDERMINDS, USB (HARD DRIVE), POWER BANK FOR YOUR DEAD PHONE BUT NEVER FORGETS SHIT ABOUT IT BUT IF YOU SQUARE THEM UP THEN IT'S UR MOM WHO TOLD YOU OFF FOR EXISTING (THEY BESTIES WITH THEM), DONE WITH LIFE BUT DONE. WITH. LIFE. ENERGY, ESFJ, (CONTESTANTS OF THE APPRENTICE ENERGY)
SCORPIO RISING = FORGOTTEN BUT INSPIRED, HEARTBROKEN WOMAN ENERGY, LONER, ASSHOLE AT BEST FOR EVERYBODY'S BEST CASE SCENARIO, GHOSTS BUT YOU KNEW THEM TO BE TOO CUTE FOR THEIR HONOUR TO LIVE AMONG YOU, CIA FOR THE BEST SONS OF BITCHES, WILLING TO IGNITE CONFLICT FOR A RESOLUTION 'THEORY' THAT WAS NOT EVEN YOURS ANYWAY (TRIBE-LIKE) ENERGY, (BEST FRIEND AT FIRST GLANCE ENERGY)
3. GEMINI RISING + SAGITTARIUS RISING
GEMINI RISING = BELIEVERS OF A NEW WORLD, STAR STUDDED HEARTBREAKERS, LIKES TO LEVEL UP YOUR CONVERSATION ABOVE YOUR MOTHERS WEIGHT GAIN, BASICALLY YOUR HANDS IF THEY HAD SOME SPUNK TO GO UP AGAINST THE NORMS IF YOUR BRAIN IS NOT THERE, WILLING TO START A GOOD TIME LIKE ENERGY, HELPS YOU DIG A GRAVE LIKE THE LAST BITCH SEES YOU DYING AN THEY BE LIKE 'GOOD, LET THEM DIE' LIKE ENERGY, (WILL LIKE TO BEAT UP A BITCH FOR A BITCH LIKE ENERGY)
SAGITTARIUS RISING = *YOU'RE LIKE THE FCKIN REASON THEY HATE YOU BUT -TURNS TO LOOK AT THE BESTIE AT THE RIGHT THAT ACTUALLY HAS A DREAM- LIKE, THEY THE ONES WHO PROFITS OFF A DREAM IN THE END BUT IF YOU KNEW THEM, THEY LOVE TO MAKE SENSE OF THE BITCH THEY'RE WITH. SO THEY LOVE TO MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD BY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT-* CROSS THEM OR BITCH, THEY KNOW A FCKIN LEGEND TO TELL ONE DAY (IT'S THEIR LIFE THAT IS UNSPOKEN FOR BUT THAT IS LIKE THE START OF THEIR FAIRYTALE = THEIR EX-LIFE IS SHITE IF NOT ACCOUNTED FOR, THEY REMEMBER EVERYTHING THEY BELIEVE IN THROUGH THEIR AQUARIUS BEST FRIEND OF ANYBODY), KILL A BITCH WITH A DJINN MAKES YOU THINK BRO, THEY MAKE YOU FORGET BUT THE DAY YOU MEET A BITCH THEY SQUARE YOU UP AND MAKE YOU LIVE A ANOTHER DAY CUZ THEY LIVE TO SEE ANOTHER BITCH, BROTHER, THEY RUN THE UNIVERSE LIKE ALLAH FORGETS WHY HE LEFT THEM ON SEEN, BROTHER, THEY HATE BEING FORGOTTEN BY ANOTHER STAR SIGN LIKE THEIR WORLD IS NOT EVEN BELIEVED BUT YOU STINK, BROTHER, ACTIN LIKE THEY RUN THE GODDAMN CIRCUS CUZ THEY BELIEVE IN A DUNYA MADE FOR THEM AND NOT AGAINST THEM SO YOU WANNA BE A BITCH, YOU DID IT TO THE BITCH WHO RAISED YOU, BROTHER, FCKIN SQUARE AN UGLY NIGGA WITH A BAD DREAM CUZ THEY DON'T LIE LIKE YOU SEE, BROTHER (AQUARIUS UNDERNEATH THE SHEETS, BROTHA)
4. CANCER RISING + CAPRICORN RISING
CANCER RISING = YOU NEVER WATCHED THE TV SERIES 'FOUNDATION' THE FIRST TIME SO WHY BOTHER WATCHING HIM NUDE FIGHTING YOUR DAD LIKE THAT ENERGY, EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS IF YOU NEVER SEEN IT, THE NANNY (TV SERIES), YOU REJECT YOUR OWN HYPOCRISY AND THEY ARE 'THAT', THEY GOT A FAMOUS RELATIVE SOMEWHERE BUT YOU HATE THEM CUZ YOU WERE THE REASON WHY THEY DIED 'BUT U KNOW THEY NOT' ENERGY (JAPAN IN A PERSON)
CAPRICORN RISING = MY DAD IS A _______ AN THEY BELIEVE YOU, BITCH. *MAKES A POINT BUT NEVER HEARD* (LIKE THAT IS POOR OF THEM TO BE HEARD CUZ THEY HARDLY SPEAK), WORST CASE SCENARIO IN REAL LIFE, BEST CASE SCENARIO FOR A WORLD END CASE, LIFE LESSON IN A PERSON IF YOU THOUGHT OF THEM, YOU MET THEM AS A BABY ENERGY, YOU LOVE THEM TO NEVER EVER HATE THEM, YOU KNEW MY MOM FROM DOCTOR WHO ENERGY, I HATE YOU AND IT IS FINALISED ENERGY, SHOW-RUNNERS EVERYWHERE HATES YOU FOR BEATING THEM FIRST IN OPTIMAL RESOLUTION THINKING FIRST ENERGY, RUN THE WORLD - BEYONCE (MP3. WAV) ENERGY, BEYONCE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND AT SOME POINT IN REAL LIFE CUZ SHE IS LIKE YOU NEVER MET HER (YOUR SAGITTARIUS BESTIE MIMICKED YOU), YOU HAVE ENEMIES AS YOUR FRIENDS ENERGY, I WILL KILL YOU AND IT IS EVIDENT ENERGY, ANNA WINTOUR HATES YOUR GUTS AND THEY ARE THAT ENERGY, FATHER'S BEST FRIEND IS NOT EVEN A PUPPY ANYMORE BUT YOUR PARTNER IS ACCURATELY ATTUNE TO YOU BUT 'I HATE YOU' TURNS TO 'NOT EVEN YOU' ENERGY
5. LEO RISING + AQUARIUS RISING
LEO RISING = SINCERE BUT FCKIN HATES LIFE FOR THEIR BEST PARTNER CO-WORKER ATTITUDE EVOLVER BUDDY NOW WIFE/HUSBITCH ENERGY, IS THE REASON WHY YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE YOURSELF ENERGY, HATES YOU TO BEAT YOU ENERGY, ARIES STEREOTYPE IN ACTUAL REALITY, ARROGANT BUT HELL YOU DONT KNOW ME BUT SMUG-LORDS TO THE CORE ENERGY, TOOK YOUR HIGHSCORE AND MADE IT THEIR CURRENCY TO MAKE YOU LOOK STUPID ENERGY, LOVES EVERYTHING TO HATE YOU BEING THEM ENERGY, WILL MAKE YOUR FAMILY RUN A BUTCHERS UNDERNEATH YOUR NAME ENERGY FOR HUMAN RESOURCES ENERGY, IS THE DEVIL, LINNA RIAZ IN ALL HER WORK ONLINE BUT YOU NEVER ATTENDED TO HER INTUITIVELY BUT YOU THE ONE FCK BOI SHE USES AS AN EXAMPLE TO IRRITATE THE MASSES CUZ OF UNIVERSAL STANDARDS, YOUR WORST CASE SCENARIO IN A THOUGHT ENERGY (BODY)
AQUARIUS RISING = DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU BUT HECK THEY'D DIE FOR YOU ENERGY, MARTYR, WILL ABSOLUTELY EAT YOU UP IN AN ARGUMENT IN YOUR OWN IMAGINATION CUZ THEY MUCH LIKE THE CAPRICORN STEREOTYPES BUT WITH NO FCKS TO GIVE ENERGY BUT YOU SOLD THEIR SOUL AT SOME POINT IN YOUR LIFE ENERGY, FEEDS ON HUMAN SOULS LIKE A FCKIN LIBRARY, CLAIRVOYANT SO YOU KNEW WHO YOU ROYALLY PISSED OFF ALONG THE BLOODLINE WHICH IS THEIR KARMIC LINEAGE TO NO FAULTS CUZ THEY THE FATHER CAPRICORN RISING MFS ARE TALKING ABOUT AND IT IS ENERGY, SHUTS. YOU. UP. INSTANTLY, MAFIA BOSS ENERGY, THOMAS SHELBY DIED FOR DIS BITCH ENERGY, CILLIAN MURPHY, JUST DON'T FCK AROUND CUZ THE SAG BESTIE AT THE SIDE WILL KILL YOU BY BELIEVING WHILE THE AQUA IS ENJOYING LIFE THAT ENERGY, CELEBRITIES DONT MEAN A THING ENERGY, *IS THAT CELEBRITY IN A GROUP CHAT THAT MANAGES PEOPLES SITUATIONS LIKE ALAN TURING GAVE UP HIS SOUL TO GET BACK AT HUMANITY CUZ OF LGBTQIA+ DEPENDED ON HIS SOUL FOR IT, APPLE DEVICES GETTING TOO INTRUSIVE ON YOUR C*CK ENERGY, YOUR MOM IN A DISNEY MOVIE IS GAY ENERGY, TIME-TRAVELLERS, DONT PISS OFF YOUR LITTLE SISTER ENERGY, BEST FRIEND NEVER ENERGY, LIKE A FORGOTTEN 9YO SIBLING BEST FRIEND YOU MET ONCE IN YOUR LIFE BUT WAS LIKE WHAT YOU HEARD OF RIVER PHOENIX BUT YOU STAYED TRUE TO THEM LIKE YOU KEANU REEVES BUT HATES YOUR GUTS TO SEE THE TRUTH BUT DOES NOT MIND YOU SEEING THEM IN MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO ENERGY, 'SHUT THE FUCK UP' AND THEY MADE A REALITY ABOUT IT TO TEACH AN *INSERT NAME HERE* A THING OR TWO ABOUT EGALITARIAN PHYSICS BUT IT WILL LAST CENTURIES CUZ OF YOU, THE NIGGAS THAT ACTUALLY STARTED THE QURAN ENERGY, (YOUR MOM)
6. VIRGO RISING + PISCES RISING
VIRGO RISING = YOU HATE THEM TO BE THEM ENERGY, *ANSON SEABRA IS THE ONLY ONE WHO DOES NOT GET IT BUT YOU'RE THERE (LINNA RIAZ CHANGED HIS LIFE FOREVER), LIKE SATURN RETURN HAS A GIFT YOU UNLOCKED CUZ YOU NICE, VERY VULNERABLE TO BE AROUND NIGGAS ENERGY, HATES THAT ONE PERSON AND IT'S YOUR REALITY ENERGY, WILL MAKE AN AQUARIUS WOMAN DO HIS BIDDING CUZ HE KNOWS A BITCH ENERGY, LITERALLY THAT CHATTER-BOX BEST FRIEND THAT SQUARES A MAN INSIDE YOUR SOUL ENERGY, JOHN LEGUIZAMO ENERGY, HATES A DAD TO KNOW YOU ENERGY, DOESNT KNOW A MAN TOO GOOD ENOUGH THAT EVEN JOHNNY DEPP IS SCARED OF YOU ENERGY, SARCASM IS ANIMATION TO YOU ENERGY, DIED A WHILE AGO TO CONSUME A NEW PERSONALITY ENERGY, CARES ENOUGH TO KILL HIMSELF ENERGY, *ANSON SEABRA'S DISCOGRAPHY IS ACTUALLY YOUR LIFE BUT YOU WENT TO HELL CUZ YOU PISSED AN GEMINI RISING OFF WHICH IS WHY YOU HATE SHIT TO HATE SHIT RECURRING THAT EVEN MATT SMITH HATES YOUR GUTS CUZ HE'S THE SAME, BUT FCK HIS MARRIED LIFE ON DOCTOR WHO (HENCE THE BLUE MAN)*, HATES TO BE AROUND A NIGGA EXCEPT A GRANDDAUGHTER ENERGY, IS YOU ENERGY, KIRBY IS ACTUALLY AGNOSTIC (HEARTBROKEN WOMAN)
PISCES RISING = DONT PISS OFF ANNA FRIEL IN PERSON. MAKES A JAMAICAN WOMA- AND NOW YOU GET THE REFERENCE, TV TAKEN TOO SERIOUSLY, YOUR LIFE IS NOT EVEN THE SAME BUT YOU'RE DEAD IN HELL ANYWAY, STONER-THOUGHTS IN A PERSON BUT DIED IN A DREAM, NOT EVEN ALLOWED TO TALK MF'S, END CREDITS DIED TO LET THE MAIN CHARACTER LIVE ENERGY, IS ACTUALLY THE MAIN CHARACTER ENERGY, PUSHING DAISIES IN ACTUAL REALITY ENERGY, OBJECTS TAKEN FOR GRANTED ENERGY, (HOME)
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xxoxobree · 1 year ago
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I swear niggas act like people be having miles act like a domestic abuser who beats up reader and drinks and got arrest warrants and restraining orders or something like an ain't shit nigga when it's just him being a lil possessive and a lil mouthy like its really not even as bad as it could be 😭
Scroll pass it if it ain't for you y'all cant dictate what people write...its FANFIC ppl write for free!! for entertainment nobody's condoning it and you'd think people have the common sense to know not to actually go for real niggas who act like that irl but i guess not 🤷🏾‍♀️
Common sense isn’t as common as I thought 🤣🤣 like relaxxxxx!!! You don’t have to read it , I scroll pass stuff I don’t like all the time , I’m doing just fine 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️
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angelsaxis · 2 years ago
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But also regarding cultural appropriation. West Africans (or any mainlander but I'm Nigerian so I'll talk about me) being aware that Black Americans are descendants of west Africans but only using that knowledge to claim a weird ownership over Black American culture because they think they "made" it is so fuckimg BIZARRE to me like what do you mean you only claim hip hop and dreadlocks when it's defending culture vulture crackers. Dreadlocks arent even super supported in Nigeria??????? Especially not even on women when it's super common in the US for Black women to have dreads????
Like Black Americans obsessed with Africa in a hotep sense even the ones who stay away from egypt are corny as fuck when they start trying to speak with authority on something they dk about. Nigerians who are obsessed with Black American culture without respecting a single iota of it are corny as fuck because they think wearing dreads and chains and saying nigga means they can also just let white people in on it.
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grlsbstshot · 10 days ago
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NEON LIGHTS
Pairing (Original Characters):
Jameson Lucas (Aaron Pierre) x Imani St. Cirie (Megan thee Stallion) Genie Adesanya (Jayme Lawson) x Ellington “EJ” Dupree (Kelvin Harrison Jr.)
Chapters:
Neon Lights Masterlist
Chapter Synopsis: jameson deals with the consequences of the many disappointments he's given imani over the years. sloane continues to unravel and only Christian realizes. genie and ej take another step in their relationship while imani wonders if she and jameson are worth saving.
Warnings: smut (18+), toxic relationship, emotional breakdown, explicit terminology, dirty talk (kinda), dd/lg (slight), dom/submissive sex scene, p in v, oral (male receiving), biting -- if we missed anything, let us know!
Word Count: 8.4k Divider Template: @cafekitsune
Notes: 
The following characters are original creations. Their voice claims are Usher / Lucky Daye (Jameson) & Summer Walker / SZA (Imani). We have no affiliation to any of those artists.
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Jameson stepped out of the elevator, brushing past stilted bodies as he made his way towards the parking garage. He had called Imani six times since leaving Sloane's apartment but there was no response. He scrolled past all the texts, all the notifications, and rejected several other calls. The only person he wanted to talk to was her. He got the voicemail again and the realization that she wanted nothing to do with him set in. He strode to his car, his jaw clenched. By the time he slid into the front seat, he was determined. He'd just go to her house. Even if he had to talk to her through the damn intercom at her front gate, he'd do it.
With a plan in mind, Jameson turned the car on and prepared to leave...but his gaze strayed to the phone in his hand. Common sense told him not to do it but he did. He went back to EJ's text and clicked the link to the music. Even as her voice filtered in through his car speakers, he didn't quite accept that it was her. It'd been so long since he'd heard music from her. Even her voice sounded different.
The untrained ear probably didn't hear it but Jameson did. He heard the anger, the loathing. She used to sing about him with exasperation but always love. Everything they sang about one another held an understanding -- they loved each other. He couldn't hear it anymore. Her lyrics were vivid, each word painting a picture of the love they’d shared and the ways it had fallen apart. He could hear the anger in her tone, the bitterness laced with sadness. The despair mingled with hope. Fuck.
I get this type of feeling you ain't accustomed to I swear I'd be at peace if it weren't for you
He winced the first time he got a shot on the project. They had done it back and forth to one another but she sounded fucking miserable with him. It was like he could pinpoint every single time she touched pen to paper and wrote a lyric that was about their relationship.
I don't care about what you seen in me You were not who you pretend to be I will regret giving my last, man I should've let you crash out Can't believe you blaming me
Every situation flashed right before his eyes. Argument after argument that leads to making up.
Trying to find, you're my blindspot, it's fine niggas Ruin me every single time
The first time they saw each other after a year -- when she made him swear not to make her any promises so she could avoid being disappointed.
You know we got a real history That's no reason I can't choose me You know that dick been good to me You make it hard for me to choose me Dancing and kissing, the kitchen Makes me forget, I forgive him
The morning after they returned from Italy -- when everything seemed to be on an upswing for them.
That pussy hit like royalty Must be hard for you to lose me
The frantic texts and calls that he couldn't stop himself from making. That he didn't want to stop.
Text me like I'm waitin' for you to come lie to me Ruin my day, sayin' shit to hurt me, I can't compete Still on the way, I lay awake if you're not around me I'm so on to you, still gone for you
God, why did she stay with him? Three years together. A year apart. She still gave him the chance to come back even though that was how he made her feel.
You don't wanna be, be without me You don't wanna live I don't wanna go, ooh, no I don't wanna be alone, oh All that I know is mirrors inside me They recognize you, please don't deny me
It was true. He didn't want to live without her. But how was he ever supposed to go back to her with this knot in his gut? How was he supposed to lay next to her at night knowing he drained and twisted her up inside like this? Even without trying? She had every right to hate him and she knew it. In those lyrics, it told their whole story. She wanted to hate him...but couldn't.
He hadn't even realized he was driving until he came to a stop...at his own house. Even his subconscious knew he couldn't face Imani right then. What was he going to say? I'm sorry. I was wrong. I fucked up again. I hurt you again. Look away, forgive me again. It sounded hollow as fuck even in his head. He didn't have the right to ask for any of it.
He hadn’t just hurt her a few times -- he’d broken their relationship in ways he couldn’t even comprehend. She’d poured her pain into this music, and the world was celebrating it, but all he could hear was the sound of her heart-shattering and it was his fault. So he sat there in his punishment, listening over and over. For the first time, he wasn’t thinking about what he’d lost. He was thinking about what he’d taken from her — and how he’d never be able to give it back.
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Her entire body felt like it was in shock. She felt numb. The carefully planned dinner she'd prepared for Jameson had spiraled out of control. She didn't even remember breaking dishes but they sat in shattered pieces around her as she leaned against her front door. How could he just leave her? He wasn't supposed to leave! He was supposed to appreciate her and be happy she was there for him. He was supposed to see true loyalty from her. But somehow...it had all fallen apart.
Sloane’s hands trembled as she slowly crawled across the floor, avoiding slivers of shattered plates. By the time she had enough awareness to climb to her feet, she realized she needed her phone. She searched the room, finding it underneath the couch. In the chaos, it had slipped away. It trembled in her hands as she tried to decide who to call.
She was sad. Hurting. Who was she supposed to call? Her parents? They didn't care. Genie? She had tossed that friendship away. Jameson? Her heart clenched at the idea of calling him and going to voicemail. She sat on her couch, holding the phone to her chest before it dawned on her. She wiped her damp palms on her skirt as she called the contact and the phone rang. Her chest felt tighter, her breaths shallow and uneven.
When his voice finally came through the line, her relief was overshadowed by desperation. "C-Come over,” she said quickly, her voice cracking. “I need you here. Please.” She hung up before he could respond, her pulse racing. She sank onto the couch, running her fingers through her hair, tugging at the strands in frustration.
By the time Christian arrived, her makeup was streaked from tears she hadn’t even realized she’d shed. He stepped inside, his usual confident demeanor faltering when he saw her.
“Sloane,” he said softly, shutting the door behind him. “What the fuck happened?”
She stood, her movements frantic, and began pacing again. “He said he's done with me. Jameson — he ended everything. Our friendship, everything. He called me out for all of it—for hurting Genie, for you, for everything I’ve done.”
Christian frowned, his concern evident. “Okay, slow down. Take a breath. What exactly did he say?”
Sloane stopped pacing, turning to face him. “He asked if I fucked you. I told him it was a mistake. He didn't even care that I slept with you. He cared that it hurt Genie. He didn't even care about me." Her voice trailed off, mumbling as she dissolved into tears again. "That I’ve ruined too much, and he can’t trust me anymore. "He looked at me like I was disgusting, Christian. Like I was nothing.” Her voice broke on the last word, and she wrapped her arms around herself.
Christian approached her cautiously, his tone gentle. “I need you to calm down. C'mon, sit down. I'll get you some water." Sloane's movements were jerky and she couldn't get herself to stop shaking. Christian took her arm firmly, guiding her to sit back down. "Don't move."
For once, Sloane didn't argue or ignore him. She sat there and stared at the ceiling, the past few years hitting her hard. When he brought the glass back to her and took a seat next to her, she was in tears again. “I don't know --" she began, shifting her gaze to find his. "I don’t know who I am without him.”
Christian’s jaw tightened, his sympathy battling with his frustration. “You lived a life before Jameson Lucas smiled at you. You'll be fine without him. Just...stop digging yourself deeper."
She pulled away from him, her movements sharp, gaze darting to her phone on the coffee table. “I don’t know. I just… I need him to feel what I’m feeling. To know how much this hurts.”
“Revenge isn’t going to make this better. It’s just going to make things worse for you and for him -- not that I give a fuck about him.” “It’s not revenge. It’s justice." "So you fuck with him some more. You think that'll make him love you?" "I...I don't know how to get him back." "What if you never do. What are you going to do?"
Sloane hesitated and Christian rolled his eyes. “Wake up. No matter what you do -- he won't be yours. But the sun is going to come up tomorrow, Sloane. The world will keep on turning. Life will continue. You will continue."
Fresh tears filled her eyes again and she doubled over, laying on the couch and crying softly to herself. She was alone. She didn't even notice Christian sitting next to her, his fingers awkwardly brushing through her hair as she cried.
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EJ snored against her chest as the light from her cell illuminated her bedroom. Genie pressed her hand to his back, rubbing in small circles as she continued to text Imani back. The two hadn't seen each other in person but Genie finally found the words to tell her she wasn't upset about the photo. their friendship immediately shifted back into normalcy -- with the two texting and calling regularly. Despite the massive Jameson-shaped elephant in the room.
After listening to Imani's EP, Genie couldn't help but interfere. Even when she told EJ she wouldn't.
[ genie ] : i loved diary, mani mani ❤️ [ baby mama ❤️ ] : aw my genie. thank you [ genie ] : i promise to smack jamie's neck again when i see him [ baby mama ❤️ ] : lmao, you ain't gotta do that, baby [ genie ] : are you just going to keep avoiding him forever? [ baby mama ❤️ ] : idk, genie. i'm not ready to talk to him yet. [ genie ] : i think you should hear him out, mani. he's really sorry [ baby mama ❤️ ] : 🙄 that's the problem. he's always fuckin sorry. it's sloane today, but next week, it'll be some other shit. [ genie ] : but you love him. you haven't loved anyone the way that you love him. i think you should at least hear him out [ baby mama ❤️ ] : i can't make no promises, genie 🙅🏾‍♀️ [ genie ] : okay, okay. i guess i'll take it. there is something else i have to tell you tho...it's about christian and me. [ baby mama ❤️  ] : what? i promise those pics ain't mean shit. i just wanted to make jameson jealous. [ genie ] : i know, i just want you to be careful with him .the reason why i stopped talking to him is because he slept with sloane. [ baby mama ❤️ ] : wtf??? 😡 you lyin! [ genie ] : i wish i was. i confronted sloane and she said he didn't even want me anyways...he liked someone else. i'm starting to think it's you he wanted. [ baby mama ❤️ ] : fuck, i'm so sorry genie. that nigga wouldn't even got a chance to breathe my air if i knew that shit. he's blocked now! and if i catch that bitch sloane in the street, i'm whooping her ass. i promise you that. idgaf bout no fame shit. [ baby mama ❤️  ] : are you okay now? [ genie ] : yeah, it's in the past. i got a new man now. [ baby mama ❤️  ] : ....new man?
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Imani stood in front of the mirror, adjusting the strap of her dress, her gaze drifting the length of her gown. Being in front of crowds didn't phase her but she was going to a charity event -- a Christmas day gala. After spending the morning with visiting friends and family, she felt a sense of calm. He didn't stand in the forefront of her mind on Christmas Day. But the second she counted him out of her system, he course he did something to show her that he was still embedded in her skin.
As she descended the stairs to show off her dress to the assembled relatives, Imani rounded the corner with a bright grin. "And I look damn good!" There he stood among her cousins and aunt -- her father glaring from a corner. He looked handsome, quietly composed. He acted like he was supposed to be there. "What are you doing here?" she asked him, ignoring the curious looks of her family members.
She hadn’t expected him to show up tonight. Not after everything that had happened between them. But when he’d agreed weeks ago to escort her to the gala, she had assumed it was just a polite gesture— he was doing his best to get back in her good book. She hadn’t expected him to actually follow through.
And yet, here he was in a perfectly tailored tuxedo, standing with his hands in his pockets, leaning against her kitchen counter.
"We made plans," he replied, his voice warm, but with an edge of determination. “I wanted to keep them.”
She hesitated, eyes flicking over him, then around the room to everyone else. It wasn't as if they weren't aware of what was going on. They all saw the gossip, heard the news. But still -- she felt vulnerable letting them all have a front row seat to a fight with him. "Hmph. They definitely weren't still on." She hadn’t thought about what this night would actually feel like. It had been easy to imagine herself attending the gala without him—easy to picture her life moving forward without the constant ache of their broken relationship. But now that he was standing in front of her, it was harder to push him away.
"They aren't?" He asked with a deceptively innocent tilt to his head. "I didn't get that message from you. I'm sorry."
He was practically bating her into a reply. Imani glared at him, choosing to ignore his presence. She didn't respond, didn't say anything. She continued to fawn over her family, acting like Jameson wasn't there at all. They took pictures together, she tasted her aunty's dressing, and she kissed her parents goodbye before her team between to help her get into her driver's waiting car.
Jameson didn't complain, didn't beg for her attention. He stood silent and eventually followed her out of the house, waving goodbye to the family members that did engage with him.
She sighed, looking away from him. The thought of spending the evening with him, surrounded by people who would notice their tension, made her stomach churn. But something in her wouldn't let him win. They couldn't see her fluster or sweat when it came to him She had to admit, part of her wanted to go. Part of her wanted to see if this night could somehow undo all the hurt they’d caused each other.
“Mani,” he said, once he got into the car, his voice low and insistent. “We don’t have to pretend everything’s fine. But we can still do this. For one night. Let’s just...take things as they are.”
She met his gaze then, and for a moment, the weight of everything between them seemed to disappear. It was just him. Just her. And the night ahead of them.
“Fine,” she said, crisply. “But I’m not doing this for you. I’m doing this for me.”
He smiled and she saw a flicker of something in his eyes. Relief? Grief? It was something she couldn't identify. Every time he looked at her, it was as if he was asking for something. Whatever it was -- Imani didn't know if she had it in herself to give.
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Sloane adjusted the strap of her Brandon Maxwell gown, a trembling hand brushing against her hair as she peered at her reflection in the tinted window of the car. Pulling herself together after Jameson left her alone in her apartment had been difficult. Christian had been a frantic last resort. He had shown up when she didn’t truly expect him to. She spent days in a daze, trying to truly understand what had gone wrong. The instinct to say something, to lash out was so strong that it felt suffocating. She’d been doomscrolling on Instagram and saw a grainy image of – was that Jameson?
It had been him. An image, taken from the account of one of Imani’s family members and posted directly to This Just In’s account. Seeing they were together had given Sloane some kind of strength. How dare they be happy when she was struggling? Her heels clicked against the pavement as she left the car and made her way towards the gala without an invitation. Sloane had a currency that mattered more than paper: Her name.
Heads turned as she passed, her presence commanding attention. But she wasn’t there to charm or distract – she was there to destroy. She didn’t even care what Imani would say or do to her. Just as long as Jameson’s gaze met her own again. Even if he was looking at her like he hated her – at least he was looking at her.
With a laugh and a promise to donate three times the amount as anyone else, she was allowed to enter. She saw him almost immediately. Imani wasn’t far but they weren’t wrapped up in each other. They weren’t laughing at her pain. They looked…miserable. It should have made her happy but Sloane simply stared, wondering what was happening between them. Imani didn’t meet Jameson’s gaze, Jameson kept tugging on his suit like he was uncomfortable. What was going on?
“Sloane.”
She turned sharply, her eyes narrowing as she met Christian’s gaze. He was impeccably dressed, as always, but there was a sadness in his expression that she didn’t expect.
“What are you doing here?” she hissed at him, somewhat ashamed that he had seen her cry a few days before and now he was looking at her with pity. “This has nothing to do with you.”
“It has everything to do with me,” Christian said firmly, stepping closer. “You’re spiraling, and you’re about to make a fool of yourself—and everyone else in the process.”
Sloane scoffed, frowning as she moved away from him. “You don’t get to lecture me, Christian. You’re just as complicit in this mess as I am.”
“Yeah, I am,” he admitted, his voice low and steady. “I’m stuck in this shit because I wanted somebody so bad that I lost myself trying to get her. Look at her. Hell, look at him. Just look!”
Sloane reluctantly looked across the room. Jameson was gazing out at the crowd, his eyes seeing but he didn’t seem to be registering anybody around. Imani was looking at him. Her gaze was soft. Almost sad. She loved him. Even if she didn’t want to admit it, Sloane could see it.
“They’re in their little world. We will never be able to get in because all they care about is each other.” Christian told her roughly, the reality making her sad. “I may not be able to judge you right now but I’m not the one standing here, ready to burn everything to the ground because I didn’t get my way.”
Her eyes flashed with anger and she jerked away from him. “You think this is about me? This is about him. Jameson thinks he can walk away from me like I’m nothing. Like I didn’t matter.”
“You mattered,” Christian said, his tone softening. “You did. And then you didn’t. That’s your own fault.” She flinched, recoiling as if he had hit her by being so casually cruel. It was a simple statement. One that had been true. Sloane hesitated, her lip trembling slightly. “But he…deserves it,” she said, her voice trembling with a mix of anger and hurt. “He deserves to know what it feels like to be humiliated.”
Christian stepped in front of her, blocking her path to the couple. “And what about you? Is that what you deserve? Don’t you think you’ve been through enough?”
Sloane’s lips parted, shoulders slumping as his words sank in. She began to blink quickly, trying to rid her eyes of tears. “What am I supposed to do now? Just let them win?”
He glanced over his shoulder, peering at Imani and Jameson. Whatever he’d been about to say, he chose not to. Instead, he pressed his hand to her elbow and began to walk her toward the exit. Sloane was too overwhelmed to do much of anything but let him. “Nobody is winning, Sloane. All of us are fucking losers in this shit. It’s time we both stop chasing a dream.”
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Genie looped her arm through EJ’s as they entered the grand ballroom. Her Jacquemeus Pilou boots work perfectly as accessories. Her self-designed black velvet mini dress left a shoulder bare and very little to the imagination. For once, she felt good about everything. She cuddled close to EJ, knowing they were going to have much to explain to their best friends – but she was okay with that. She was ready. Genie adjusted the hem of her dress and scanned the room, already aware of the tension crackling in the air.
“Imani’s here,” she murmured, spotting her friend near the edge of the dance floor. She was standing stiffly next to Jameson, who leaned in to say something. Imani turned her head sharply, her expression a mix of defiance and unease.
EJ followed Genie’s gaze, his brow furrowing. “They don’t look like two people enjoying a gala together.”
“They don’t,” Genie agreed, her lips pressing into a thin line. She sighed, glancing up at EJ. “Imani doesn’t need this kind of stress right now.”
“You think Jameson brought her to stress her out?” EJ asked. “He’s obsessed with that girl. He’s probably trying to fix it.”
Genie hesitated, her eyes flicking back to the couple. Jameson’s posture was slightly hunched, as if he was trying to close the gap between them, but Imani’s arms were crossed, her body angled away.
“Whatever he’s doing, it’s not working.” she said softly, sighing. 
Before EJ could respond, movement near the entrance caught Genie’s attention. Her chest tightened as she spotted Sloane descending the stairs, her sharp gaze zeroed in on Jameson and Imani.
“Oh, God,” Genie huffed, annoyed with the fact that she was one foot into the gala and her night was looking to be ruined.
“What?” EJ turned, following her gaze. “Ain’t this bout a bitch.”
Sloane’s stride was purposeful, her dress clinging to her like armor. There was something wild in her expression, a barely restrained chaos that Genie had seen before—usually right before Sloane did something destructive.
“We need to stop her,” Genie said. “No. We don’t.” “Baby–” “No. That’s their shit, Genie. We said we’re out.”
It was like a car wreck. Genie couldn’t force herself to look away. Before Sloane could reach Imani and Jameson, Christian arrived. The two of them watched him step in front of Sloane, his hand on her arm as he spoke quickly. Sloane shook her head, her gestures animated, her voice too low to hear over the music. Christian’s grip tightened, and for a moment, it looked like she might shove him away.
Genie held her breath.
Sloane wavered, her shoulders slumping slightly. Christian leaned in, his tone firm but not unkind, and whatever he said seemed to take the fight out of her. With a sharp turn, she stalked back up the stairs and disappeared into the night.
Genie exhaled, relief washing over her. The tension between she and EJ were about other people and Genie would be damned if she let her night end on a bad note because her friends – ex and present – couldn’t get it together. “Okay. Fuck it. Fuck this party. I’m sorry. Take me home.”
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The air inside EJ’s home was warm and quiet, a stark contrast to the loud chaos of the gala. Genie slipped off her heels and sank onto the plush couch, her head falling back against the cushions.
“Tonight was... a lot,” she said, closing her eyes.
“Yeah,” EJ agreed, loosening his tie. He sat down beside her, his arm draping casually over the back of the couch.
Genie turned her head to look at him, a small smile tugging at her lips. “You always know how to keep things steady, don’t you?”
“I try,” he said, his tone light.
She studied his face, the lines of his jaw, the way his eyes softened when they looked at her. She finally had that calm back. Before they let the world in, she had a little sliver of peace with EJ. He had been right. She cared far too much about other people and it was beginning to fuck with what she was trying to build with him.
Genie frowned somewhat, beckoning him over with a wave of her hand. “I’m sorry. I let everything get in my head again.”
EJ gave her a soft smile before leaning down to kiss her lips gently. “You can’t help it. That’s how you are. You love everybody and everything.”
“I just want them to be happy.” She whispered. “I know. But that’s not your job.” “It could be. Technically, I don’t have a job. I'm an heiress.” “Smart ass.” He murmured, kissing her again. “I can think of a job for you.” “Can you?”
His hand moved from the couch to her chin, fingertips gliding to press to her throat gently. Genie didn’t flinch, the action unfazed her. She trusted EJ implicity…and that turned him on.
“I can.” He knew she could see that things had changed. He’d only ever been between her legs to taste her, holding off on sex until they could have a conversation that he’d had several times before. Pulling his hand away, EJ rounded the couch and took a seat next to her. “I like sex, Genie. I like it a lot. And I like to control how I have sex.” 
EJ’s gaze met hers and he saw her eyes go wide. It took her less than a second to understand what he was saying. “Okay.” she murmured.
“Do you understand what I’m saying to you?”
EJ spoke clearly and softly, his gaze tracking her movements.
“I’m not a virgin, EJ.” she told him with a laugh, “You want to tie me down? Spank me? I’m down. Whatever you want to do, I will do. Because I want you.”
“It can’t just be about me, Genie. We’re going to be together, we both have to like it.”
He seemed to be talking himself out of going further with her but the feel of her soft hand against his mouth stopped all conversation.
“I understand. We can take it slow. Teach me.” 
The words triggered something in EJ. He gave her a grin before nodding his own head. "Alright. Lemme teach you."
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Despite the agreement that they'd let the night be what it was, the tension between them was thick and suffocating. The gala was in full swing, the lights from the building casting a warm glow over the crowd of well-dressed people. The party certainly didn't stop when they arrived but Jameson could detect a ripple of disbelief. They weren't supposed to be together. Even though they weren't holding hands, weren't kissing, or behaving anywhere near the way they normally would -- the two of them being together was going to cause a commotion.
Throughout the evening, they danced around the situation, polite and distant. They didn't even engage with each other much at all. He wanted to be there for her -- to not let her down once again but the more he stood beside her, the more he remembered just how fractured shit was. Every time he tried to engage her, she refused. It was like pulling teeth to exchange words.
He got more and more uncomfortable as the evening passed. He didn't know what to do with himself and Imani wasn'[t interested in making things easy for him.
But finally... she spoke to him.
About a fucking drink.
"I'm gonna go speak to my auntie real quick." she murmured. "you want a drink? I might go to the bar on my way back." 
"That's the first time you've talked to me like you don't hate me in two hours. And it's about a drink." he replied, not answering her question. Jameson reached up, gently pulling at the bowtie against his neck. Being on raw terms with Imani always made him uncomfortable but doing it in front of a crowd? It was even worse.
She chuckled lowly at his statement and he knew he was in for it. "What do we have to talk about, Jameson?” she said. "I think you've said enough. I heard enough. Don't make me regret asking."
Jameson tugged at his bowtie again, lifting his neck to undo the damn thing. he was beyond uncomfortable and keeping appearances wasn't important to him anymore. He didn't give a damn if people noticed they were standing feet apart and barely touching. "No, I don't want a fucking drink. I only came because I was tired of disappointing you. but I might as well have stayed at home for all you care." He pulled the silk from his neck, shoving it in his pocket as he unbuttoned the top button of his dress shirt.
She clenched her jaw, folding her arms over her chest. “Yeah, maybe you should have stayed at home.” Well, this conversation was going horribly. 
“You really don’t think we have shit to talk about? I guess not, considering you’ve been ignoring my texts and calls.” Jameson asked her, amazed at her audacity. They hadn’t spoken since sloane’s party and that had been her decision. Once again, he was iced out and desperate to get back in. She gave him absolutely nothing until tonight. Everything else he found out from her Diary ep, and just the thought of the project agitated him even further. 
She sighed. Her annoyance began to show through her furrowed brows and crossed arms. She could no longer keep up with the facade either. “What the fuck do you want me to say to you? You said everything you needed to say. So, why we gotta keep talkin’ about the same shit?” she snapped. 
“Imani, you dropped a whole ep talking about how you felt about us before even picking up the phone to talk about those feelings with me, but we have nothing to talk about?” She looked around the gala, looking for any eyes on the two of them. Jameson didn’t give a fuck though. His reputation took a backseat to their relationship every time. 
“Why does it matter what I do? You made your choice and it wasn’t me. So nothing I do concerns you.”
Jameson turned to glare at imani, actually confused for the first time during their conversation. He didn't even need to play stupid or lie. “In what world, In what fucking reality, did I tell you that I chose her over you? I should have done differently that night but I would never say that shit to you.” He thought back to their argument and couldn’t figure out what the fuck was even happening here. He spent his entire week, bombarding her with calls and texts, but she was still focused on Sloane? 
Imani turned to glare at him. “You didn’t have to fuckin’ say it! It’s the fact that you didn’t say anything. That’s making a choice right there, Jameson.”
He sighed. “I texted and called you this whole week. I went and got fitted for a tux without you even telling me if you still wanted me to go to this gala. Then I showed up. All of that was for you.” he said, his voice strained. He stared at her. “I wouldn’t do that for anybody else.”
“Okay? You want a cookie?” imani scoffed. “None of that means anything to me, Jameson. You didn’t stick up for me at Sloane’s party. you chose her. So go be with her.” He watched her scan the crowd again, realizing that she kept her temper in check, because there were other people around. “Go get your girl.”
From her EP to her admitting his actions meant nothing, his feelings were hurt. Jameson didn’t fool himself into thinking that everything would be okay if he showed up tonight but he felt he was doing the right thing by being here. “You can’t tell me how I feel about you. You can’t tell me I love anybody more than I love you. You can’t tell me that I don’t think the world begins and ends with you. I don’t fucking feel right if I can’t talk to you. I do stupid shit like fly to Italy and bang on every room door just to fucking see you. But I’m so tired of trying to convince you that my sun does not rise if you aren't around...so I won’t anymore. I’m done. You’re right about one thing…I should have stayed my ass home tonight.”
it may have been a sliver of a second but her demeanor softened. it was like he triggered an alarm because her guard was right back up again. "Yeah, maybe it's best if you go then. Because you tellin' me how much you love me don't mean shit. If you really loved me in the way you say that you do, I wouldn't even have to question my position in your life.”
Jameson hated to leave her, he hated to continue the distance between them, but it was getting to be too much now. He could feel his fragile composure slipping even more. “I love you and I don't want to keep hurting you.” He leaned in briefly, kissing her cheek. “So I’ll see you when I see you, Imani.” He gave her one final look before walking away, slipping through the crowd easily as he made his way out.
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Imani exhaled a breath she didn’t even know she was holding. contrary to what she said, She didn’t want Jameson to leave. Imani looked out at the crowd to see if he was still there. Her eyes focused on him and no one else as he moved through everyone. She wanted to tell him that she wanted to work things out. That she believed him but her feet didn’t move an inch. She just watched him until she couldn’t see him anymore. 
She sighed, standing to her feet. Imani went to go look for her aunt, Toni St. Cirie. she needed a distraction. Imani wasn’t going to cry, but if she thought about her conversation with Jameson for too long, she would lose it. 
Luckily for Imani, she didn’t get far in her heels when she felt a bump to her side. She looked to see the blonde woman standing beside her. “You need it. Drink.” Imani took the champagne without a second thought. She almost chugged it down until she remembered where she was at, so she settled on a sip. 
“Thank you. Can you sit with me for a while?” If Toni was here, she was more than likely working. She never attended galas just to mingle and bump shoulders with the wealthy. Imani didn’t want to take her away from her job for too long. She just needed someone to talk to. 
“Of course.” She answered softly. The two navigated the floor together.  Imani held onto her champagne glass tightly. the more people she saw, the less she wanted to be there. She wanted to go home. She was grateful when Toni found a spot away from everyone else. Toni pulled out a chair for Imani and took a seat next to her. The woman looked around before speaking. “Do you want to talk about it?”
She rolled her eyes, thinking back on her conversation with Jameson. She wanted nothing more than to forget it. “Auntie, it’s so stupid. I know you heard about that fight at that girl’s party,” she said, refusing to address Sloane by name anymore. “Well, I hadn’t talked to him this whole week because what do we have to talk about when you obviously made your choice? He was still calling and everything, but I ignored it all and dropped Diary. i just didn’t expect him to show up tonight.”
Toni quirked a brow as she explained their latest quarrel.
Imani sighed, "I know i should leave him alone. it’s just – hard.”
“Well then, it’s good that he left right?” Toni told Imani. she had never been Jameson’s biggest fan. Her aunt always advocated for her to leave him alone and focus on her career. She said a relationship like theirs would only lead to insanity.
Imani nodded slowly, “I–I guess so,” she said timidly. Now that they were alone, she forgot about her formalities and looking like she had everything together. She gulped down the rest of her champagne, feeling it tingle in the back of her throat. She needed to feel something other than anger and sorrow right now. The champagne would do.
Toni reached out and touched her knee. “Baby…” she said softly, shaking her head. “Anything worth doing is going to be difficult. You keep going in this circle with Jameson. You’re happy for a while and then you’re right back here. In this feeling. He shouldn’t get to have all this power over you. This should be the last time that you feel like this.”
She gazed at her aunt. Imani always took Toni’s advice regarding her career and everything else. She was terrible at listening to her when it came to Jameson. Yet, she nodded her head. “You’re…right. Nobody should be allowed to make me feel like this.”
“Damn right,” Toni confirmed with a smirk. she took her niece’s hands in her own, holding them close. “You just released an ep full of hits, Imani. That should be your focus. Not a man. But if you have to date someone, let me introduce you to a nice boy.”
She laughed for the first time tonight. “Depending on what the nice boy looks like, I might take you up on your offer.”
Toni smiled, nodding in agreement. “I’ll make sure he’s an elite-looking boy.”
“I trust your taste, auntie. All of your exes are fine as hell.” She couldn’t think of ever seeing Toni with an ugly man; she had good taste. The two of them continued their conversation about men, which eventually shifted to her career and different ideas she had for her Diary ep, and eventually, Imani wasn’t thinking about Jameson at all.
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Genie might be the woman of his dreams.
She asked to be taught and he wasted no time doing just that. EJ figured they would take things slow. He would teach her how to please him. They’d get to sex another time. But as she lay across his bed, the dress had customized for herself hung with care in his closet, he knew he was going to fuck her.
She turned her head, taking his length down her throat once more. She was on her knees and stomach, leaning over the edge of the bed to get to him. EJ grunted in pleasure at the perfect feel of her wet mouth, a deep rumble that reverberated in his own chest. His dick throbbed in her mouth as her cheeks hollowed out. She kept her gaze on his face, hands clenched in the blanket as if she were waiting for instruction. 
“Pull back.” He told her roughly, pleased when she immediately knew it meant to keep only the head of him in her mouth. Pre-cum mixed with her saliva coated his dick and EJ gave her a wistful sigh of appreciation. She held him there in her mouth, those pretty hazel eyes just asking for more.
He seized the back of Genie's hair, pulling her forward onto his cock slowly. The further they went, the wider her eyes got but she didn’t pull away. Didn’t buck back. Didn’t tell him she couldn’t handle it. The action caused Genie to gag slightly which only turned him on more. He groaned and thrust his hips forward only to be met with her hand against his thigh.
EJ pulled back suddenly, leaving Genie gasping for air. "Not bad," he praised lightly, grinning wolfishly down at his lover as he reached around to stroke himself off lazily, watching Genie with hooded eyes. “Now I’m going to be nice and give you a choice. Don’t you think that’s nice of me?”
Genie opened her mouth to respond but then closed it and nodded. He had given her four rules when they started to play.
Be honest about your comfort level
Don’t speak unless given permission
Call him “Sir” or nothing at all.
No touching without permission.
EJ grinned, proud that she had remembered a rule. "Good girl. Very good girl." he praised before leaning down to kiss Genie gently on the lips. They were full and wet from the attention she had given his dick. He was even more proud of her. "So here's your choice: do you want me to fuck you or do you–”
“Fuck me!” Genie blurted out, her eyes going wide as if she couldn’t believe she’d said it. They both went quiet before EJ burst out in laughter. Genie blushed but she didn’t seem dismayed at the turn of things.
"I wasn’t done talking," EJ told her with a quirked brow. “I’m sorry, Sir.” She said softly, her fingers pulling at the blankets in anticipation.
He brushed his thumb against her mouth, liking the way she opened her lips as if begging him to press the digit inside. He gave in to her, pushing his thumb in. Genie brushed her tongue against it, sucking just as eagerly as she did when his dick was in her mouth.
It was enough to make him feel less guilty about giving in. He was fucking her because she asked…but also because he wanted her so bad that he could feel the pre-cum dripping from his dick.
"You picked what we do. I decide how we do it." EJ told her decisively. “Turn around.” 
She was already on her knees but she understood exactly what he meant. Genie scrambled to turn her back to him, stretching her hands across the bed. The anticipation was a fucking killer. He watched her tremble, glancing over her shoulder every two seconds as if he was going to change his mind. EJ pressed his fingers between her legs, gathering her slick onto his fingers. She did her best not to make a sound but EJ knew she’d be unable to resist. They were new to all of this. He was going to go easy on her.
“Let me hear it, sweetness.” He encouraged her, noticing how her shoulders sagged in relief when she got permission. Genie let out a soft moan as he climbed onto the bed, his knees sinking into the mattress as he pressed himself against her. He drew his dick up and down her folds, teasing them both. EJ leaned over her back, peppering kisses along her spine as he finally grasped her hips in his hands.
EJ felt her brace for the inevitable thrust so he moved slowly. Inch by inch, he introduced her to her dick and it made her clench and squirm more than she would have if he just pinned her down and fucked her. Genie arched her back in pleasure, panting softly. She squeezed around him and he just knew it was going to be over if he didn’t do something.
"Hold it," EJ whispered, leaning down to press his lips to her ear, “I want to take my time with you.” He kissed and nipped at her earlobe. Genie shuddered at the sensation and nodded, eagerly spread her legs wider, giving him better access. She sank further against the bed, her palms turned down to grip the comforter.
Ej chuckled darkly and trailed his lips down to Genie's neck, nibbling and sucking on the sensitive skin there. Meanwhile, one hand reached between her legs to tease her already wet clit. Genie moaned and arched into his touch, craving more. “Sir, I–”
But he ignored her.
EJ continued to tease and torment her. Genie arched back, twisting her hips out in pleasure as he began to move them in a slow, torturous rhythm. She mumbled words he couldn't quite comprehend but he understood how her body twisted and turned. Her hands gripped the sheets tightly. EJ's other hand traveled up to fondle one of her breasts, pinching and rolling her nipple between his fingers as his hips kept her pinned beneath him.
The combination of sensations had Genie writhing beneath Ej's touch, begging for release. But EJ seemed determined to push her closer and closer to the edge without letting her fall over.
"P-Please," Genie moaned desperately, needing more friction against her sensitive clit.
"Please what?" "Please, sir!" "No. Not yet."
Trapped underneath EJ, Genie couldn't do anything but hold on for dear life. His hips picked up speed, the rhythm he'd spent what felt like forever setting had changed. He had changed. "Open that pussy up for me." He grunted, the rough and vulgar words were so different from anything he'd ever uttered to her that Genie looked back over her shoulder -- almost checking to see if this was the same man who'd been slowly seducing her for months.
Their gaze met and EJ tilted his head, wordlessly asking if she liked it. She gave him a little smile, permission to continue on. And so he did.
"I said...open." His hand pulled back from her breast and slapped her thigh. Genie spread her legs wide again, falling back against the bed. Whatever he had done had made it easier for him to dig into her and she was feeling shit anew. "That's what I'm talking about." EJ grunted, lifting a leg to plant his foot against the bed.
He pounded into Genie from behind, picking up speed. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure through his body and he couldn't control the moans that escaped his lips. He had nothing on Genie. She cooed and oohed, gushed over him and burrowed her face in the sheets -- almost as if she were embarrassed of the noises he was bringing from her body. Her throat, her pussy, her thighs. They were all loud as fuck, echoing throughout his bedroom.
EJ couldn't think straight, all he could focus on was the intense pleasure coursing through his body with each movement of his hips. Her submissiveness brought it out of him. He could feel himself getting closer to the edge with every passing second and knew that neither of them wouldn't be able to hold on much longer.
"Sir!," she cried out, her voice strained as she curled up and took every thrust. "May I cum? Oh please let me. Please. I was a good girl." She begged him and that sent him damn near over the edge. He looked down at the girl of his dreams -- gripping his sheets, biting her lips, brows furrowed and dripping with sweat. He would give her anything in the fucking world. An orgasm was nothing.
"Go ahead. Cum for me," Ej grunted out, biting down on the sensitive skin of Genie's neck. It sent her over the edge. She spasmed under him, whimpering and grunting as he keep going. She squeezed at him so tightly that stars exploded behind his closed eyelids. "Jesus, fuck..." he whispered as he came hard, white heat igniting every nerve in his body.
They collapsed onto the bed together, panting heavily and still connected
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You said you were done. He said he was done let it go. She told herself several times throughout the night. She had drank and donated...and did her best not to cry over the fact that she felt so very alone. She mingled some but her mind was still on him.
It didn't matter what she told Toni. Her heart wanted Jameson. She didn't know if she even be listening to the damn thing but it beat like crazy when she thought of him or saw him. He owned her in a way that made her damn near crazy. How could she let him walk away without seriously considering she'd never see him again?
She just couldn't take it anymore. She unblocked him and sent a text message. One that he didn't answer. Her heart pounded in her chest as she waited for a response. When it didn't come, she didn't get angry -- she decided she was going to have her way. They were going to figure this shit out. Imani pulled her phone from her clutch, swaying as she dialed the number. Being tipsy helped her put her pride aside.
It rang twice...and then he answered. "Hello?"
She could tell he was hesitant. Hell, she was terrified of what was going to come of it but they needed to do it. They had to get it out. "Come back and get me." She told him softly.
"I don't want to fight anymore, Mani." "We're not fighting. We're talking." "All we seem to do is fight." "And miss each other. Don't we miss me?" "...Yes." "Then get your ass up. Come get me, Daddy. Let's figure it out."
He hesitated for only a minute but then Imani heard him sigh and the sound of keys. "I'm on my way."
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jokeshappinesemotion · 6 days ago
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Google what the fuck why the fuck is that Diddy is the only suggestion in my phone stop this bullshit I don't wanna see anything about Diddy I don't care what he did has nothing to do with me, so remove this as something that's so common on my phone can I see things that I don't know about and at least learn something. This is kind control, I'm gonna stop using this Google pixel and any other device, I'm going all ape , cave man , this has just been tiring and exhausting, why the fuck is Diddy so important
And why are you wanting me to know about his business can't you just rock up the fucker since Google you got all the files more receipts to get from you but you are busy suggestion videos to me which won't help me the only thing it's doing is that it's telling me that I can fuck kids , you are making us start looking at child porn and I'm sure this is how Diddy started he must have heard it somewhere maybe it was done to him
I've never been raped as a kid so don't twist my mind with stupid suggestions, this is not okay come one now who wants to know all about this niggas behavior not that I'm judging but that's his life try to make this as private as possible for the sake of our kids and also everybody else , we all have good and evil but don't turn our attention to this sinister it's of no use you have failed us . Americans you are very dumb sometimes I wonder how you invented science I'm sure it was Africans who did it and you store it . Otherwise no one in their senses would do this not Diddy and his compliances but the people spreading his news like a virus it's a shame
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breakingbobcat · 10 days ago
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dream diary
i hesitate to share any of this, but it needs to be recorded. careless queen. is it careless when you choose to do it anyway? throw caution and then throw hands. i am aries after all.
no one gets me like aries men.
today felt like a day of being invaded by watcher(s). makes me wonder. obvs. how's a nigga gonna tell me "magical thinking" when he's the one who taught me how? lmao. i let him get away with so much shit back in the day, but what about now? am i being stupid again? should i vanish?
my first thought was chris. there's no way to be sure. could just as easily be another person. or no one, just me and my Id.
INTENSE dreams. i resisted sleep as long as i possibly could after christmas eve's fitful, restless night. was truly dragged out dog shit yesterday. kept up a brave face.
what i recall are these:
on the streets. a female after me. seemed blonde but butchy, not a femme fatale but ...creepy vibe. chick with a dick and we fucked multiple times while in motion. i wasn't sure why i was into it. didn't feel right. i was not happy inside either.
had another? with phil. i was sobbing and asking why he left me. he was saying how bad he'd wanted me and didn't really explain anything. i wanted to die to be with him. woke up to pee and it definitely felt like one of the many MASQUE dreams. it was not Phil, of that i'm convinced.
in the last dream, whilst it was dark this early eve, i was fast flying. chris was fucking me with ryan's dick and i was coming and coming the way i did with ryan...which is nothing like an orgasm i can give myself. also, i never orgasm in dreams. get close but no cigar. not so this eve. i was entirely into it and he was into me. had the atmosphere of when queen of the damned and lestat have their drinking ceremony (in the film -- not like the book -- minus the shitty music). soul sharing. then,
the storm came. and the floods. i had these telescoping tripod legs and was pushing my way along the highway, flying high and fast, but still...controlling vehicles somehow? it was odd. i had to repel in a sense off the magnetism of the land. had to stay in motion or sink into the waves and traffic.
sounds like a chris problem...in a common dream setting.
it was probably him.
ryan always gives up on anything he wants.
and neither of them can give me the stability i need to thrive. it's very tragic because they love me and i love them. ryan has probably moved on though. chris probably will too.
i need to focus on me, getting my shit together, for real. i have no idea what happens now. not sure i want to know either.
i need to keep my wits about me, in the present.
it was so good though, for a minute. there's nothing like making love in the imagination. there's nothing like love, via imagination. i was telling him that today, after i woke up from the dream about phil.
don't masque, i said. what phil and i shared, and what bobbie and i shared, was not really about the physical, even if it spilled over onto that emotionally. there was no physical relationship. it was the ecstacy of ...
there's no name for it that i'm aware of. no satisfactory description. that's why i liked the genie movie with tilda so much. it was about that kind of love...which she felt for the djinn.
i think, i suspect...what women want most is to be seen, recognized. it's not the same as what men want...whatever that is.
or maybe it's a me-thing. a prima donna thing? aries. i dunno. it seems to be important to me. to be seen through, rather than "as." chris should be the one who gets it, with his eye/whole sight ideal in the background.
there's a lot of things i never should have had to explain to him, according to the poems of his i've read. i thought that meant he and i would have an easy time of creating harmony. it's been anything but.
ryan and i were more harmonious, when we were able to come out of our respective holes.
i've had...so many soulish-mates in my lifetime. close ones, or something. the language is insufficient. or my knowledge is. maybe twin flames are almost impossible to become mates with? given that they are meant to teach us, and we had so much to learn, so much to overcome?
i wanted to understand the secrets of harmony before i died. or, i do. i dunno. i don't know what i want in the future. i only know what i want now: to get strong.
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