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thebadjoe · 3 months ago

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BAD JOE'S DRDT CH.2 CRIME SOLVING THEORY FINALE

Hello! It's me again, the pretend-detective-that-will-prove-once-and-for-all-that-my-solution-is-the-closest-to-the-truth.

Oooo boy, we're getting very close to the end with chapter 2, eh? Man... episode 14... that was quite the episode!

I got a lot to talk about, so I'll try not to waste too much time this time around. And of course, this is MAJOR SPOILERS WARNING OF DANGANRONPA DESPAIR TIME CHAPTER 2.

Let's talk!

As you can see in the title, this is pretty much the last time I'll be talking about my theory for good. The reason as to why should be obvious. We're getting really close to the end of the chapter as well as getting close to having the truth revealed by the series itself.

So in other words, this is my very last attempt at solving the murder mystery. So since this is most likely my last time (until there's another murder mystery I want to solve), I better go out with a bang, right? :D

For those who read part 5, it's mostly similar as part 5, but I added a few more things to support my theory. The main difference will be things that I really have to fix.

Anyways... this latest episode revealed a lot of things. A lot of these things are affected by my theory too. I will split those in three categories : The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

The Good

Then MonoTV explains that broken and missing things take longer to replace and...

So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. It is now confirmed 100% that the tape was truly missing since the murder attempt. We could even say that because of this on top of how the narrative is going with this episode, there is no other form of grippy tape inside this killing game aside from the one that came from the pull up bar.

Phew! I'm so glad it's finally cleared up, even though it should've been so obvious! (Well, the clue of when the tape was missing was subtle, but you get what I mean, right?)

It was honestly blowing my mind when people were claiming crazy things about the tape... such as "Well, it's a design error by the dev! There's supposed to be a tape there, they just forgot about it!"

So, I'm actually glad and happy that I was absolutely right on that matter, especially since I was the first person who vocally pointed out the missing tape ever since... episode 9, I believe?

It's possible that there were a few people who noticed it before me or around the same time as me, but I don't recall seeing anyone else posting about it. Nonetheless, for those like me who discovered the moment of the missing tape a long time ago? Honestly, kudos to y'all! Amazing job!

Another thing that's also considered good for me is something regarding the attempted murder that I deduced correctly.

"Ace had woken up and was struggling"

I deduced that at some point during the attempted murder, Ace woke up. The reason why I firmly believed that was the case is because of this picture!

If you take a closer look, you can see that there's blood on Ace's fingers. Since those are not finger injuries nor would Nico have a reason to stain Ace's fingers with blood, then the only logical conclusions would be that he got blood on his fingers because he touched his neck wounds, therefore, he woke up at some point during the murder attempt.

Another W for me, let's go! Hurray! Speaking of W... another good thing for my theory happened. In regards to Eden being innocent because the BDA triggered when Teruko, Eden and Whit saw the body at the same time.

YES! FUCKIN YES!!! THANK YOU DAVID! THANK YOU FOR SAYING THOSE WORDS THAT I WANTED TO HEAR SO BAD! I LOVE YOU, BUT ONLY AS LONG DISTANCE FRIENDS!

You guys have no idea how much it heavily supports my theory thanks to what he just said. It was also something that I deduced for a very long time too! There's of course a lot to talk about on this matter, which I will discuss another time.

But for now, let me savor what I consider to be the biggest W of my crime solving theory of this murder case. Things are looking really good for me.

But of course, I have other problems that crossed my way in exchange, so let me show you what I mean.

The Bad

Let's start with the elephant in the room. Nico is sole person responsible for the attempted murder of Ace.

Before I forget, here's my theory post as reference so that you can have a fair idea of what's been debunked.

Anyways, this truth shatters a good chunk of my theory post, especially regarding the attempted murder itself. Because... according to my theory, I thought that the person responsible for the attempted murder was the same culprit as whoever killed Arei. Thinking it was Eden who did the attempted murder on Ace.

But this theory of mine on that matter has sadly been completely denied. Eden did not attempt murder on Ace, that much is a fact that I can't ignore.

But that's not all. It's practically confirmed that the wire found in the gym was indeed Hu's custom weapon.

This shut downs my idea that Eden must've gathered some kind of wire inside a grandfather clock.

I'm well aware that I was kinda pushing it with this idea (even though there were a conversation supporting this idea), but mannnnn.... IMAGINE HOW FRIGGIN SICK IT WOULD'VE BEEN IF THAT WAS ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENED?! IT WOULD'VE BEEN SUCH A 1000 IQ MOVE ON MY END!!!

Haha! Sorry! I got the hype get the best of me there! I mean, to be fair... I was under the assumption that Eden's must've done the deed and that she must've gathered that wire some other way. You can't fault me for being this creative!

But at the very least, from this narrative, we can deduce that the DRDT Dev may not try to pull a move where we need to imagine something that could've existed somewhere, they probably never intend to make us go for something far-fetched unless there's enough clues to suggest it. I think that will be something very important to remember whenever we get to watch chapter 3 in a future time.

Moving on!

Nico is the person responsible for stealing the turpentine.

This may not seem much at first, but it's actually very bad for my theory. Reason why is that to have my Eden!Culprit theory work, I need a way for Eden to subdue Arei in some shape or form.

The best way to do it would be by knocking her out with the turpentine, but unfortunately for me, Eden initially didn't have access to the turpentine. Nico did. This means that I lost my prime way for Eden to subdue Arei.

Eden obviously can't overpower Arei for obvious reasons... on top of having no signs of struggle on Eden and Arei's body like bruises and such.

So because of it, I need to figure out a way for Eden to be able subdue Arei without having to steal the turpentine as it was Nico who stole it initially. I'll discuss more about it later.

There is also another problem with my theory, not something the episode directly showed, but it's still very noteworthy. Since Eden is not the culprit behind the attempted murder of Ace, my plan of having Arei locked up and hidden in the relaxation room no longer works anymore. Therefore, I currently don't have a way to explain the purpose of the ball of clothes since my whole murder attempt theory is crushed.

So these are the bads, one of them being a lot more problematic than the others. Anyways, I don't even think that's the worst of it all. The worst comes with...

The Ugly

"It's you two, isn't it?"

I'm happy that we finally got Teruko to actually accuse someone... but NOT LIKE THIS!!!

God friggin dammit!

I get it though. I understand why the creator did that. It gives a lot more suspense and a much better reveal at the end of it all, but aaaaggghhh! This is literally the worst case scenario!

Instead of having people try to figure out why this one person is the culprit and how they did it, we now have the community practically split in two to decide which one between Ace or Eden is the culprit of the murder case.

Ugh.... what a pain in the ass! I can't believe you've done this, DRDT dev! Not giving us the final answer until the very end. I will admit though... that was very unexpected and a very cool twist. That makes it much different from what we're used to see in the dangans and fangans! So yeah... well played, dev! But you should know by now... you're not fooling me with this. I know very well what the heck happened behind this murder case! I remain undaunted.

So are you saying that...

Yes... I still believe that Eden is the culprit behind the murder case of Arei. Ace has nothing to do with the murder of Arei and there's absolutely no one else but these two suspects who could've possibly commited murder.

I'm sorry to say this to the people who believe that a third party is responsible for the murder, but that's just impossible. Only these two could've taken the tape and they had absolutely no reason to give it to someone else. Nor did they get it stolen.

Otherwise, why would they not reveal it at all? It wouldn't make sense no matter how you put it. Not only that, but it would be so unsatisfying of a plot twist especially considering that with all the clues we've been given so far, only the people in the gym at a specific time could've taken it, which still comes down to Ace and Eden.

It's also practically confirmed that there's no other source of grippy tape. I understand that you guys are trying to do this because there's a lot of issues with solving the case if eitheir Ace or Eden is the culprit, but instead of going for an unrealistic scenario of who else could've done it, you guys need to figure out how eitheir of these two suspects managed to pull it off despite these problems!

And that's exactly why I'm still dead set on accusing Eden. Because despite all these problems I've encountered since the beginning of it all, I figured out a lot of ways to solve these issues and it's going to be the same thing here. These new problems I have encountered... I will solve them... all of them!

Therefore, being open-minded is crucial in solving this murder case, a complex one at that!

Alright, with these news out of the way, it's finally time for me to solve this murder case! Although, unlike the giant recap that I did on part 5, I'm not going to do that. I will begin by discussing with you all the biggest mystery of this entire murder case.

The Biggest Mystery?!

What are you talking about? Are you referring to the fishes? The broken lights? The ball of clothes? Their murder motive?

Nope! There is something that's been brought up very few times at the very beginning of the trial and never again... even though there's something seriously strange about it.

(I'm sure there's other moments where this was brought up, but I couldn't find them.)

But yeah... there are two suspiciously strange things about this (that people simply brushed it off as nothing wrong happened) and I seriously think we need to look into this.

During lunchtime of the day before the BDA, Arei was seen in the cafeteria, but didn't utter a single word.

Aside from the "conversation between Arei and David in the relaxation room", no one saw Arei from lunchtime up until the BDA.

Let's face it... Arei, who's usually a loudmouth, didn't say a single thing at lunch? That's just incredibly weird! It doesn't make sense! You guys know very well that she would, at the very least, say something mean or troll someone at least slightly.

But even weirder than that is the fact that no one else saw her since lunchtime! There is absolutely no way that Arei would've spent the rest of the day eitheir hiding herself in her dorm or just simply avoiding contact on anyone. That is just so out of character!

Well... maybe Arei was deeply concerned by David's actual secret and was being secluded up until it was the right time to visit David. I mean, David and Ace clearly saw her that evening, so it's fine, right?

Yeah, I don't think so. Let's say she was deeply concerned by David's secret since lunch, why didn't she try to contact David much sooner than that? Doesn't quite make sense now, doesn't it?

Oh! I know! She was spending time with Eden because they're friends now, right?

I'm sorry, but that's not gonna work eitheir. Let's say Eden was the culprit in that scenario... why would Eden lie about not seeing her since lunch?

Well... suspicions would've been thrown at her, that's why.

And why would that be the case? Remember that during that day, Eden spent time with Hu from the evening up until the night time. And since we're under the assumption that the murder occured in the morning of day 4 (the day of the BDA) and that she spent time with Hu as said earlier, her supposed time spent with Arei in the afternoon would be irrelevant to the murder case!

Besides, wouldn't someone at least have noticed that the two of them were spending time together in the afternoon?

And even if we were to presume that Ace is the killer there, it's the exact same thing! Eden would have absolutely no reason to lie about spending time with Arei if that were the case.

Well, maybe Ace intimidated Arei and stayed quiet this whole time because of it!

...really? We all know very well that there's no way Ace would be able to intimidate Arei, of all people!

Then maybe-

I'll stop you there! Let's face it, there's no normal reasons to explain why Arei didn't talk at lunch nor why she was missing for a considerable amount of time. Besides, if it was something irrevelant or completly mundane about what was happening with Arei, what would be the point of doing all of that? Why make it seem like it was a mystery if "nothing special" happened.

I'm sorry, but it just simply doesn't make sense. Especially if the fact that she was missing was brought up multiple times. There is no way that this is unimportant, no matter how you look at it!

This is also one of the reasons why I firmly believe that Ace is not the culprit. It is impossible to give a reasonable answer to this mystery if you go for the Ace!Culprit route.

It's unsolvable! You can't solve it even with Eden as the culprit!

No! That's wrong!

For those who read part 5, I'm sure you know already what the answer to that is. As for everyone else, there is a very interesting and logical way to solve this mystery.

But before I reveal it, let me first bring back a topic from earlier that I wanted to talk about.

David Chiem...

Okay... so what? He's clearly lying about it, as stated by Nico and J!

And why would you assume that he's lying? Is it because he's a lying and manipulative asshole? Is it because you don't believe in anything he says? Is it because you don't understand him? Well... to be fair... he's rather complex and a bit hard to understand his gameplan, however...

Doesn't that statement feel too important to simply disregard it? I'm not just saying this because his quote is in gold and bolded text, but also because of the timing and what he said earlier.

Also... shortly after that, after he asked Teruko, Whit and Eden if they saw the body at the same time and that Teruko answered with "What are you getting at?", here's how he behaves...

Isn't it peculiar? Like... doesn't it feel like there's a sense of emergency behind his defense and reaction? It's almost like... he's been waiting for the right moment to reveal that piece of information. Whether he wants to help or just want to make Teruko despair for the sake of exposing Eden as the culprit, it doesn't matter. He wanted to reveal that information.

His statement that he saw the body first is clearly wrong because he couldn't have seen the body in the morning, he had an alibi at 7:30 AM and it's physically impossible for David to instantly search the playground, find the body, do nothing and go back without being seen by eitheir Teruko, Whit or Eden.

Well, of course, he's lying about seeing the body in the morning. It's literally impossible.

Huh? But why are you insisting that-

David is the first person to find the body, but he discovered it at an earlier time. It doesn't make sense for anyone else to have found the body first. Otherwise, they wouldn't have hidden this piece of information at all, there's no reason to. But if we're talking about David however... it's whole different story. I also have plenty ways to support the idea that he found the body much earlier.

This is after Ace tells the group what he witnessed and after David gets his secret exposed and decides to reveal himself.

Ace claimed that he witnessed David and Arei having a conversation about David's secret during the evening, the day after the attempted murder.

David claims that he's a lying piece of shit and an unreliable witness.

Ace couldn't possibly have lied about the secret he heard from the conversation since that was indeed David's secret. So what else could David be referring to when he claimed that Ace is lying?

Lying about where he heard the conversation wouldn't make sense eitheir, it wouldn't really change much. And we already know for a fact that David visited the relaxation room that day.

Therefore, by process of elimination, the logical deduction would be that Ace lied about when he heard that conversation. Also, doesn't that weirdly coincide with the reveal that he found the body first?

So if you match his body discovery information with the logical possibility that Ace lied about when he heard the conversation with also David's confession that he did indeed meet with Arei that evening without revealing what the conversation was about, we get this amazing solution : David didn't have a conversation with Arei in the evening of the day 3. He had a conversation with her in the evening of day 2 instead, the day of the attempted murder on Ace. David found Arei's corpse in the relaxation room in the evening of day 3.

I know I had many people who used to believe that this can't be true and that David is lying about his claim that Ace's a liar and all that... but quite frankly... can you still make that claim after watching episode 13 AND 14?

In episode 13, we learn from David's memory flashback that there was more to David and Arei's conversation than what Ace let on, which already gives a sign that Ace is hiding something.

And in episode 14, there's of course the reveal that David was the first person to find the body. Let's be real here everyone. I seriously doubt that this is a mere coincidence after all this time.

Anyways, now that I've explained my point regarding David, it is time to connect the dots!

Connecting the dots...

Going back to the biggest mystery...

As I said before, I stated that there's a way to solve this mystery with Eden as the culprit. There's also a very good reason why I brought up the idea that David must've found the body at a much earlier time.

Let's think back on the mysteries regarding Arei.

She did not talk at lunch and she was never seen again since then.

We've already established that it wouldn't make sense for her to stay silent and not be seen again for a long period of time. So what would be the most logical way to explain that discrepancy?

Something wrong happened to Arei that day. If you think back on my idea regarding David, he found Arei's body in the evening of day 3. Then, if you combine that with the fact that Arei was mysteriously missing since lunchtime, we can then deduce that Arei was actually dead for quite some time. It would make sense to deduce that Arei must've been dead during the whole time she was missing.

But Ace witnessed the conversation betwee-

Nope! Remember, I made the deduction that Ace lied about when he witnessed the conversation. He most likely witnessed the conversation happening in the evening of day 2. Therefore, Arei was alive during the evening of day 2.

(FYI, by day 2, I mean the day of the attempted murder while day 3 refers to the day after the attempted murder. Day 4 is the day of the BDA)

Okay, but what does that have to do with Eden being the only culprit that can explain the mystery behind it all?

Don't worry, I'm getting there.

So with the idea that Arei was already at least dead after lunch, it changes a lot of things, but it still doesn't answer the other oddity regarding Arei... Why was she being silent during lunch time?

Before I propose the crazy (and repeated) idea, let me share a fact with you all. During lunch time, Eden was nowhere to be seen in the cafeteria.

Combine everything I've shown you and then we get this beautiful conclusion : Arei was silent during lunch time because that was not Arei. It was Eden disguised as Arei. Arei was already dead during lunch time.

I'm sure you have a lot of questions or things to object to this, but let me first state that it would perfectly explain a lot of things. Not only would it solve perfectly that big mystery I've just shown, but it would also explain why David claimed that he was the first person to find the body. It would also explain this little goofy event in the morning of day 3.

To give a small recap, Teruko wakes up at 8:00 AM, but still feels sleepy. So she's like "5 more minutes."

Then, we get a black screen saying "4 hours later", so she ends up waking up at around noon instead. Funny 5 more minutes turns into oversleeping for hours instead joke, that one! (Let's face it, it's relatable)

Anyways, this little scene right there could be an extremely subtle way to indicate that Arei actually died in the morning of day 3 and they made us unable to witness her death thanks to Teruko oversleeping. It also helps with camouflaging the possibility that Eden was taking the time to set up her disguise trick.

But if you have issues with the disguise trick, I've already explained it many times in part 5 with clues and hints found throughout the series on top of reminding everyone that this is a work of fiction, so as long as there's plenty evidence to suggest it, then it can be possible.

So for that to work, Eden needed to kill Arei in the morning of day 3. So first, she would need to sneakily knock her out with turpentine as it is the only way to-

HAH! YOU IDIOT! IT CAN'T WORK!! IT WAS NICO WHO HAD THE TURPENTINE! HOW COULD EDEN POSSIBLY GET HER HANDS ON IT?! YOUR THEORY STINKS!

Ah, right... the turpentine! Nico stole it from Rose...

That's no problem! Eden got her hands on the turpentine anyways!

WHAT?!?!

Turpentine, where are you?!

You're not possibly suggesting that there was a second turpentine, RIGHT?!?!

Of course not! I'm not that crazy! Come on now! Do you really think I'd make such a claim even though I made the claim that there doesn't exist any other source of grippy tape aside from what we've seen thus far? The same applies with the turpentine.

It is true that the fact that Nico had their hands on the turpentine first is truly troublesome... but then I learned some more facts about the case and realised that there is indeed a way for Eden to get her hands on the turpentine.

That's impossible! Nico had their hands on it!

Nico may have gotten their hands on the turpentine first, but did they actually keep it forever?

Think about it. What else do we know about the attempted murder that we know is true and confirmed by Nico themselves? Nico stole Hu's custom weapon : the wires.

And what was the reason for stealing the wires? To pin the murder on Hu. They were trying to get away with murder, after all.

Now, if we follow that logic, there is also another way to further pin the blame on Hu. Nico could've dropped the turpentine in the dress room, close by Hu's old uniform. It's also possible that they used some of Hu's clothes to knock Ace unconscious with the turpentine.

That way, if the crime actually succeeded, then there would be much more than Hu's wires to pin her as the culprit. But alas, as we all know, Nico's murder attempt failed. So whatever happened to the turpentine in that scenario?

Nico most likely didn't run back to the dress room to grab it back, that's for sure. Which means that in that scenario, from the time Nico knocked Ace unconscious up until Teruko runs into Eden in the dressing room, Eden had an opportunity to grab the turpentine that Nico might've purposefully dropped in that room.

But how could she possibly know that there was turpentine in here?

That's the thing. I don't think she knew that she'd find the turpentine here... well... unless she saw Nico knocking Ace out and has been quietly sneaking since then.

Why would she even bother going there this late at night to somehow stumble on the turpentine if she didn't know that she'd find it here to begin with? That makes no sense.

You're right, it wouldn't make sense. If anything, that was simply an incredible coincidence that she managed to find turpentine, something that she would clearly need to succeed in her murder plan.

I don't get it! If finding the turpentine was mere coincidence, then what was the point of Eden visiting the dress room this late at night?

Initially, before episode 14 was released, I thought for sure that she was there because she orchestrated both crimes on top of locking Arei inside the relaxation room during nighttime. However, both of these ideas are denied.

So by eliminating the impossible, only one truth remains : Eden needed to place Hu's and Teruko's old clothes inside the relaxation room before 10 pm so that they can get covered in sticky starch next morning.

It is a known fact that the "ball of clothes" is covered in starch. We also know that the only source of information we have that could potentially have a source of starch is from the enriched formula of the water misting of that plants for the relaxation room. We also know for a fact that Eden was indeed in the dressing room past 10 pm on day 2.

I highly doubt that she went there late at night only for the sake of being nice and retrieving Teruko's spare uniforms. Therefore, the only way to explain her suspicious presence in that room is if we were to believe that she's the person responsible for the "ball of clothes".

There is no other logical or reasonable way to explain it. This is the only conclusion I could arrive at. Therefore, it has to be the truth!

Alright then... what was Eden trying to do with these starched clothes then? What was her plan?

At the time I'm currently typing this... I do not know.

WHHHHHAAAT?! YOU DON'T KNOW?!?!

That's right... I don't know yet. I have a few ideas, but I don't like them just yet. So by the time I keep working on this post, I'll figure out a proper solution, I promise.

What are you saying?! Are you seriously trying to solve this problem as you are writing your theory post?!

...That's right... I'm still working on it as I'm typing this. But pay no mind to it, the solution will come to me eventually, I'm pretty sure!

...You are out of your mind, you know that?

Yeah... I know. For now, let's just say that having the clothes in that room so that they get starched was very essential in her plan for unknown reasons. At the very least, I found a reasonable way to explain how she get her hands on the turpentine.

For that matter, I know there were people asking me why Eden would even bother grabbing the tape. The answer is fairly simple. It was very convenient for her to get her hands on the tape as it would be necessary in her murder scheme.

In fact, she probably wanted to get her hands on the tape earlier than that, but Nico was already occupying the gym. She must've heard the sounds of Nico setting up something inside the gym (since the walls aren't soundproof) and must've waited inside the dressing room for some time... until the gym was clear. But of course, instead of that, Teruko runs into Eden.

So with that, I believe that I explained every mysteries regarding the attempted murder. Eden was indeed on the second floor on the night of day 2 for a suspiciously specific reason that I've already explained.

So... while I'm trying to figure out the most logical purpose of this ball of clothes, I'd like to give more points that further supports the idea that Eden is indeed the culprit.

Take that, Eden!

Let's start with one of my favorite observations in episode 14.

Ah... that scene was very touching, wasn't it? For a moment there, I almost believed Eden... up until someone in the youtube comments pointed out something really interesting about this scene. Doesn't this remind you of something? ....no? Let me help you out!

Hmm? What does that have to do with anything?

A lot of things, actually. Like... the pictures I've shown you from episode 3, Eden claims that relationships aren't transactional, that she didn't do something good so that Teruko would return the favor. Eden also claims that she wants her to be her friend, but not because Teruko feels obligated to.

Then, in episode 14, Eden asks Teruko to help her, because friends help each other. She also says that Teruko is her friend.

I know most of you will say that Eden was being desperate and in big need of help, maybe there is a tiny bit of truth to it. However, I just find it rather strange because as far as I'm aware, from the beginning of chapter 2 up until the trial, Teruko never showed any signs of wanting to be friends with Eden. So why would she now claim that Teruko's her friend and then ask for help when initially, Eden didn't do something good simply just so that Teruko would do something good in return?

In a subtle way, they're kinda like opposites to each other, the scene between episode 3 and episode 14, I mean.

To further prove my point, I'd also like to point out that during these two scenes, they both played the exact same background music. Coincidence? I think not!

Another point I'd like to talk about is something I've already brought up in the past, but it's still very important to remember it...

This happened in the morning of day 4, before the BDA was triggered. She said this a little bit after Whit made a silly comment about Arei hanging around the playground.

You could brush it off as simply Eden being not ready to seeing the corpse of Arei in here, since all the other rooms were explored on that floor, but of course, I don't believe that one bit.

Whit's comment made Eden panic considerably because for a few seconds there, she really thought that her murder plan was about to be ruined because she thought that Whit was the first person to find the body of Arei.

If Whit was the first person to find the body, then the BDA wouldn't trigger which would be dangerous for Eden. As I stated before, someone else discovered the body first and it was David Chiem.

Also, that reminds me. Timing wise, it was impossible for Eden to bring the fishes from relax room to the playground. It was also impossible for Eden to hang the body by the swing set, she's most likely too weak for that. Meaning that Eden never brought those fishes nor did she hang her by the playground. That was never in her plan to do that. She hid the body behind the curtains of the relaxation room.

Therefore, the only person who could've transported the fishes as well as hanging Arei's corpse is the first person who found the body. David is responsible for those two actions during the evening of day 3. He did it for his own selfish reasons, of course!

But wait... if David hung the body during the evening of day 3, how do you explain the body swinging during the morning of day 4?

Ah, that! It's something I've already brought up in part 6, but I'll explain it a little.

There was a reason why she put so much efforts into disguising the time of death by putting on a disguise and building a solid fake alibi from 7pm to 10pm. Eden's main goal was to have the BDA triggered during the evening of day 3, not the morning of day 4. She was hoping that someone would run into Arei's corpse that evening, which that person would go gather help to trigger the BDA.

If that actually went according to plan, Eden's alibi would've been perfect. !!! Come to think of it... the letter would make a lot more sense with this idea in mind.

Since she had nothing to do with the fishes, the initial plan was to bait the people into thinking that eitheir Arturo or someone who may have overheard the conversation would be the one who tried to lure Arei to the playground.

Except that compared to what we've seen in part 1 of chapter 2, the letter was actually supposed to properly display 7:30 PM rather than just 7:30. It was part of her grand scheme to further solidify her alibi.

(There's a missing corner, as you can see, which is very convenient to where PM could be written)

Wait, hold on... if that was the case, then Arei wouldn't be having a meeting in the playground in the morning, but rather the evening! That doesn't work! You said it yourself that she was murdered in the morning of day 3!

Hah! That's not a problem! Eden didn't need to lure Arei with a letter. She simply needed to call her out vocally. Hell, she didn't even have to be calling her out in the morning of day 3 eitheir.

She could've knocked to Arei's door right after the exchange between Ace, Levi, Teruko and herself after the attempted murder. It could be something as simple as : "Um... Arei? There's something really important I need to tell you, but I don't wanna say it here because the others might hear it since the dorms are so close to each other. Besides, it's getting really late. Can we meet up in the playground early in the morning?"

But of course, since the BDA didn't trigger in the evening of day 3, there were a few change of plans. She needed to go back to the second floor in the morning of day 4 to find out what's going on.

While she's heading there that morning, she figured that she should bring back Arei's monopad. Arei's monopad was essential in pulling off the disguise trick as she needed to gain access to her dorm to wear her spare uniform. Initially, Eden arrived to the second floor possibly a little bit before 8:00 AM, thinking that the corpse would still be hidden inside the relaxation room.

But it turns out that Arei's body was actually hanging by the swingset, in the playground. And there's fishes for some reason? (Just saying this based on the culprit's perspective)

Eden figured that it would be way too risky to mess with the crime scene even more than what she was originally going to do.

And what was she doing here in the morning of day 4?

It's simple! Eden put the Arei's monopad back inside the victim's pockets and she retrieved the letter and tore the bottom right corner of it, removing the PM on that letter. She then tore the rest of the letter and threw it in the trash bin. It's also possible that the reason why she tore the rest of the letter is to disguise the fact that the killer purposefully removed a corner of the letter.

Wouldn't it be more beneficial for Eden to not tear up the pm part since she had an airtight alibi at the time?

Not really, no. Since everyone else would be discovering the corpse at around 8 am in the morning rather than last evening as intended, there's no telling how the group would actually attempt to solve the trial.

It's possible that if the PM part was still there, they might believe that the time might be fake, especially since the body would be found next morning. In fact, if they presume that the murder happened in the morning of day 4, they would suspect anyone who had an alibi last evening because of that part of the letter. That's also practically what happened earlier in episode 12.

Levi : Is it possible that the killer tried to confuse us all on the time of the murder to create a false alibi? In that case, we should be suspicious of the people who do have an alibi in the evening but not in the morning?

Teruko : That's another assumption that would lead us astray. Forget that thought.

Levi : Why?

Teruko : We're only guessing that the killer created a false alibi to their benefit. But it's still entirely possible that it was just coincidence that we mistook the murder as taking place at a different time. The killer might not have cared as much as we do. [...]

Charles : Are you not simply dismissing the idea that the killer intentionally falsified the time of the murder?

Teruko : I'm not dismissing it. But it's far more dangerous to dramatically narrow down our suspect pool based on speculative evidence, especially when we barely understand the murder at this moment in time. In other words, we can't consider Levi's idea as evidence unless we have proof.

And there you have it. If the PM part remained on that letter and they realised that the murder could've happened in the morning of day 4, then that whole letter would've been proof enough that the killer purposefully faked the time of the murder, even if the murder didn't happen in the morning of day 4.

Anyways, if touching Arei's pockets wasn't enough to keep the body swinging, it's also possible that Eden accidently ran into the hanging body on her way in or out because she was still in a little bit of a hurry as she didn't want anyone to catch her in the act.

Hmmm... interesting... how very interesting...

What now?

Well, the idea (that I recently came up with) that the letter always displayed "PM" and that she tore up that part of the letter because her plan didn't fully work as intended... it just gave me another amazing idea.

People have been wondering for quite some time what could be the decisive evidence to pinpoint that someone is truly the blackened... I think I finally figured out what the evidence is.

Well, out with it already! Show us what will prove once and for all that Eden is the culprit!

Gladly! I used to think for a long time that the roll of grippy tape would be the ever so decisive evidence for it, since it was practically a smoking gun type of evidence. But alas... you saw what happened in episode 14, so...

HERE'S THE DECISIVE EVIDENCE : THE TORN UP CORNER OF THE LETTER CONTAINING "PM"

Think about it. We know for a fact that Arei's body was swinging in the morning of day 4 and according to my theory, only Eden could be the logical explanation behind this event happening.

Therefore, Eden most likely visited the second floor in the morning of day 4. Since her original plan was to have the BDA trigger in the evening of day 3 but it failed, she needed to remove the part of the letter that mentioned "PM".

Now, here's the fun part : what could Eden possibly have done with it afterwards? She couldn't really dispose of it in the trash bin, that's where the rest of the letter was. Eden still needed that letter to build up her narrative to make her seem the least suspicious.

She couldn't hide it anywhere else on the second floor. She didn't want to risk having someone stumbling upon a piece of paper that just happens to perfectly match the rest of the letter.

She couldn't really dispose of it anywhere on the first floor eitheir. While it might've been a logical way to get rid of that evidence, it would've been incredibly risky. By the time Eden did her finishing touches on the second floor, it should've been 8:00 AM by then, if not really close to it.

Every participant was supposed to meet up in the movie screening room for the secrets reveal, Eden couldn't risk doing something slightly suspicious when she should be heading straight for the movie screening room. She couldn't have gotten rid of it during and after the investigation eitheir, there were witnesses close by.

So by process of elimination, there is only one remaining place that Eden could've make the corner of the letter disappear. She hid the torn up corner of the letter in one of her little bags on her belt!!! It's still there as we speak!

How's that for a decisive evidence, eh? :D Take that, Eden Tobisa!

Yeah, yeah, whatever! That's cool and all, but at the end of the day, all of it doesn't really matter if you can't manage to explain what was the point of the starchy ball of clothes! If you can't explain it, then your theory just crumbles!

...heh! :D

Y-you can't be serious... there's no way you managed to-

It took me roughly a day of thinking about it, but you BETCHA that I managed to solve the issue with the ball of clothes! I have a very good idea on what Eden might've done with this piece of evidence during the murder of Arei.

The sticky situation of the ball of clothes

As I mentioned before, I used to think that the clothes were used as a way to protect Arei from the water misting if Eden were to lock her up inside the relax room. But of course, that no longer works because of the actual truth behind the murder attempt.

Yet, Eden clearly placed those clothes for a night inside the relaxation room, so surely it must've been really important to do that, right?

The answer to that is YES. It was a very necessary step in the murder scheme. In fact, I'm willing to bet that without it, her plan wouldn't have worked.

It's just some starchy clothes. Why would it be that important?

Well, as we already know, there's no way Eden could pull off the murder mechanism as shown in episode 13 (aka the drop hanging murder idea) as it would require a good amount of strength that she doesn't seem to have.

So, for her be able to murder Arei, she would instead need to use a murder mechanism that doesn't require a lot of strength. And not too long ago, I finally realised that using the starchy clothes would be incredibly helpful in pulling off that kind of murder without much troubles. Let me elaborate.

Do you guys remember my murder mechanism in part 5? If not, that's alright, let me give you all a reminder.

(Yeah, I recently added those pink lines as compared to my previous picture, just bear with me.)

Here's the order of how that murder went according to my theory

(The pink line is the longer rope and the green line is the shorter rope)

While waiting for the body to be available, she threw the longer rope above the rafters by using the roll of tape as anchor.

She then uses one end of the long rope by tying it to the filled water jugs, by the handles.

She tapes up the bars of the carousel and then keeps some remaining tape for later.

She then ties up the other end of the long rope to the carousel

She drags the victim's body out of the relax room and brings it close to the seesaw.

She places the victim's arms through the gap between the pillars of the seesaw and the tapes her wrists together.

She ties one end of the shorter rope to the victim's neck while placing the other end of that rope very close to the carousel.

She then spins the carousel on one side, let's say counterclock wise. By spinning it, the long rope would get pulled which would pull the water jugs upwards.

She keeps spinning up until the water jugs are high enough. Once it's high enough, she keeps the carousel from moving.

She ties the end of the shorter rope (the one that was close to her already) to the bars of the carousel.

She then spins the carousel clockwise, making the water jugs fall at a rapid while the shorter rope is quickly getting pulled.

The shorter rope keeps getting quickly pull up until it can no longer pull... up until it reaches the victim's neck, which would serve as a brute stopper.

SNAP! Her neck breaks and the handles of the water jugs also break from the sudden stop.

By using this method, it explains the purpose of the taped wrists as well as the scuffed marks on the ground, which happened to be in proximity of the victim's legs. Because of the sudden pull of the neck, the rest of the body would follow, the legs would be what would move the most since it's not restrained, thus creating those marks.

By keeping her arms locked up by the seesaw, it ensures that her whole body wouldn't follow along of the rope pull, which would instead result in a rather funny ragdoll moment, which would probably not kill the victim if her arms weren't restrained.

It sounded really good on paper. Like I seriously thought that I finally figured it out, I thought that it made so much sense. Unfortunately... there are some issues with it.

Ha ha! Your method is flawed! I'm looking forward to these issues!

...very well. For starters, this might cause bruises on Arei's body with this murder method, especially around the arms and shoulders. The only thing that was really restrained were her wrists, so anything else would be violently moving.

But the reason why it could bruise the arms and shoulders especially is because her head and the rope are in the way of her arms. Her head could potentially hit her shoulders and arms... or it could be the other way around too. This becomes a discrepancy since we know for a fact that apart from her broken neck, there is nothing else noticeable about her body.

Next up, the distance between the scuffed marks and the seesaw is fairly long... most likely longer than Arei's height as well. I was aware of this issue in the past, but I simply brushed it off as "it works because it's a work of fiction."

But the more I look into it, the more I feel like it would be incredibly difficult, if not impossible, to prove that the marks were caused by the movements of the legs. We also have to keep in mind that the rest of the body would surely move, so why would nothing above her legs leave no scuffed marks? That doesn't quite make sense. If the marks were way closer to the seesaw, it'd be a whole different story, but alas... that's not what happened.

And finally, it is very doubtful that the legs' movements from the killing blow would be causing all these marks we've seen back in episode 8.

As we can see from this picture, there's a lot of traces on the left side, a faint trace in the middle and a few traces on the right side. I don't think there's a valid reason I can come up that would explain why one leg would be leaving more marks than the other. On top of that, it wouldn't explain why there's a faint mark in the middle and gaps between the others.

Unless I were to presume that her legs did a few skips somehow, but I honestly think that's a stretch at this point. But that's not all, from the way the victim's body would be positioned according to my theory, it would actually be physically impossible for her legs to leave marks in such manner.

As you can see in the picture, the dragging of those marks are going up and down rather than left and right. If we follow the logic of how the victim's body would be positioned according to me, then the legs should be making those marks sideways, not what we're currently seeing.

Dang, those are pretty big flaws. Are you sure that your murder method is correct?

I used to think it was back then, but not anymore. At least very least, the idea of the pulley mechanism sounds right while the body setup and positioning is entirely wrong.

But honestly, my idea mainly didn't work because I forgot to factor in a really important element to this equation : the friction! That's right! To make sure my murder method works, I need to find some way to add friction so that the body wouldn't move as much. And how do you make that happen? With the help of starched clothes, of course!

Huh?! What do you mean by that?

This line is very important because we also know for a fact that the turf in the playground uses the same exact materials as the one in the relaxation room. Meaning that a wet turf in the playground would get sticky too.

I can't believe I let this go unnoticed after such a long time, but the stickiness of both the wet turf and the starched clothes played a major role in all of this.

Here's what I believe the culprit did with the starched clothes : Eden placed the starched clothes under Arei's body and above the turf. Basically, the starched clothes in that scenario would serve as a double sided velcro of sorts.

Would the victim's body really stick to the clothes?

Hard to say, but based on my deductions, it has to, right? We don't quite know how sticky it is, but it must've been sticky enough so that it would add friction, at the very least. I don't think it'd make her completly restrained, but rather her movements would be drastically reduced, I'd imagine.

But hold on! Wouldn't only one side of the clothes have starch on it?

Most likely, yes, but the clothes would probably be wet still. So the double sided velcro idea could still work.

I don't think so! MonoTV clearly stated that at 8:00 AM, the turf in the relax room is completly dry so it's safe to walk on it. If the turf dries up by then, so does the clothes!

Hmm... maybe, maybe not. It's true that the ground would be dry, but it's hard to say that the same would happen with the clothes. But if it is truly how it was intended, then that's no problem! Eden just needed to dip one side of the clothes into the pond and they would be wet again.

Okay, but was there enough clothes to cover the whole body?

Hard to say, probably not, if I'm being honest. But I don't think the culprit intended to lay out these clothes so that it would cover the whole body. No, I think Eden mainly wanted to place the starched clothes under the victim's head and the victim's legs.

The head and legs are pretty much what would be moving the most from sudden violent pull of the short rope attached to the neck, so putting the velcro there would be most effective. They might still move somewhat, but definitly not as much as without the adhesive. In fact, I believe that having the velcro effect under Arei's head would make it even easier to ensure that the rope pull delivers a killing blow.

You forgot something : THE ARMS!!! What about the arms?! Wouldn't they just be flailing around everywhere?!

Oh, that? Well, the wrists were clearly taped up and then-

Then what, her arms are restrained under the seesaw again? You already said that it doesn't work!

Heh, of course not! That's not what the culprit did at all! Arei's body was not placed next to the seesaw for the murder. I've already established previously that there's major problems with it. It wouldn't make sense. Therefore, she must've been placed somewhere else.

There is only one specific place that would perfectly explain the scuffed marks on ground. The area where there's scuffed marks? That's exactly where the victim's body was positioned! Arei died on this specific spot!

W-whaaaaat?!?! That makes no sense! How does that even explain how her arms were restrained from moving anywhere?

Don't worry, I'm getting there! :)

So... when we take into consideration the position of the scuffed marks, there's really nothing close by that can be used to restrain her arms, right? And placing her arms above her head like I did in my year old theory wouldn't quite work eitheir. We'd still have the same issues as what I pointed out already.

So from there, we can deduce that the victim's arms must've been positioned somewhere differently than my previous idea in my older theory. And I believe I found the perfect position to place those arms of hers.

The culprit placed Arei's arms behind her back and then taped her wrists. That way, since her back would be facing the turf, it should keep her arms mostly steady. They might move, but her back should be moving along as well. Her wrists were bound because there was still a risk that her arms would free up from her back since their movements wouldn't be as restrained.

That's ridiculous! There's no way that can be right!

...heh! :D Are you sure about that? Let me give you a reminder of how I briefly described the scuffed marks on the ground. There's a lot of traces on the left side, a faint trace in the middle and a few traces on the right side. If we combine everything I've deduced so far, we get this!

Be mindful that even though I just showed you how the victim's body would be positioned, the body part themselves isn't what fully caused those marks, it was mostly caused by the starched clothes' stickiness below the legs and head.

That would certainly help explain those odd shape and patterns on the ground. As for the wrists area, it could eitheir be caused by her hands or the taped up wrists.

But yeah, as shown in this picture, her head would be moving a bit, but not too much since that's where the culprit needed to make sure remained stable. Her wrists wouldn't be moving too much in this scenario since they would be stuck under her back. As for the legs, even though there would be adhesive below, there would still be a fair amount of movement since her legs have more freedom of movement than her head or wrists.

Just to remind everyone, by movement, I'm referring to the drag caused by the rope making a violent pull on Arei's neck.

And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen! This is my final solution to this complex, yet incredibly fun murder case! I don't know if you've noticed, but everything I've said in this post, it would match up perfectly with a heck load of clues and information that we've been provided in this fangan.

So with that said, I only have one more thing to say : The only one who could've commited this crime is you, Eden Tobisa, Ultimate Clockmaker!

--------------------------------------------------------

Thank you everyone for reading this till the end! There's probably a few things I unintentionally left out, so I'll try to add up anything missing if that's the case. But otherwise, I think that was most of it. If there's anything you don't understand or feel like there's something that may not work, feel free to ask me anything!

And don't forget : because it's a work of fiction, as long as there's enough provided information, then it can be possible!

#drdt #drdt spoilers #drdt theory #drdt solve #drdt final solution

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higgity-diggity-dummy · 8 months ago

Text

These Strings That Bind Us

first chapter; previous chapter

So this is the first chapter of this fic that I’ve posted since a few of my irl friends have started following me and now they get to see the crazed fanfiction maniac I am and I don’t know if they’re ready.

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chapter 3:

Nico scanned the room he was left in. He knew logically that he was safe. That he was allowed to be… gay. And that the people that just overheard his conversation with Percy likely didn’t hate him for it.

They probably do hate you though. Even you can’t like yourself.

He just… didn’t like that knowledge to be floating around.

It was then, after observing all the sleeping and uninterested patients that he saw the face of a particular blonde peering through a corner.

“Hey. Sunshine. I see you.” Nico said trying to mask his worry.

How long had he been there?

Will exhaled a laugh. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to… stalk…? I was going to check up on you but you were talking with Percy and I did to want to interrupt.”

“How much did you overhear?” Nico asked, deciding to cut to the point.

Will turned pinker. “Nothing! I swear I wasn’t trying to listen into your conversation. I was just watching,” he said getting redder. “I mean-! I wasn’t like ‘watching’ watching. But I was also not listening. I was just waiting for an opening is all. So I could check up on you. Because that’s what I’m here to do right now. Check up on you that is.”

Will snapped his mouth shut, trying to stop the word-vomit from getting worse. He had a flight-or-flight look in his eyes, as if how Nico responded would be the deciding factor in how this interaction went. He wished Will hadn’t stopped. He couldn’t pin down the exact reason why he liked hearing that incoherent mess of speech, but he did. It took a bit longer for him to realize that while he was brain was occupied by the rambling of the boy across from him, it was too full to waste energy on worrying.

Nico tried -really tried- to think of something comforting or cringe-reducing to say but he could help it when a laugh slipped out.

And another. And one more. And five seconds later he was miserably failing to stifle his giggles with his left hand.

“Wha-“ Will started. “What is it? Are you ok?Did one of my siblings but you on laughing gas or something? It was Kayla wasn’t it?!”

This made Nico laugh even harder. “Oh gods no. You’re just really weird. In a good way. You kept on saying more and it made it get worse and worse.” He laughed again. “Thank you for that. Holy hades I needed a good laugh.”

Will didn’t even flinch when Nico described his little speech as pathetic. If anything, it seemed to make him more confident. Composed. “Well I’m glad you feel joy at my expense,” he said rolling his eyes. “And you have a pretty laugh too. I like hearing it.” He smiled at Nico, his gaze moving to the glow between them.

Oh right.

Stop getting comfortable. Especially with him.

Nico shifted in his seat, moving so his arms are crossed with his left ring-finger covered by his arm. He failed to avert his gaze from Will’s disappointed eyes.

See? Even if it weren’t wrong, you could never be with him. You fail everybody, and Will is no different.

A few beats of silence.

“So uh… checkup?” Nico suggested.

“Yes! Right. Let me just…” he trailed off. Something about clipboards and procedures that Nico did not have to energy nor interest to pay attention to.

Will got the information he needed. Apparently a lot of Nico’s story was already in the documents.

“Like I said: I know your history,” Will stated with faux-intimidation. Nico rolled his eyes.

When they got to the physical checkup Nico started getting jittery. He felt awkward saying something to Will about it, but he really didn’t like being touched so much. Especially because Will’s hands were so… methodical. It was bringing him back.

To the times of your torment? Good. Revel in it. In the feeling of pain. Relive it all. Maybe if you look tortured enough somebody will even pity you. Why do you think you want that so badly? You know how hard it is to be yourself. Trying to share that burden with somebody else is plain selfish.

Will noticed. Probably. He didn’t point it out, but he tried to lighten the mood, albeit with terrible references to things Nico did not have the current cultural knowledge to understand.

Something about Nico being “Mr. Perfectly Fine” when asked about he was feeling. Or responding to Nico’s remarks about his werewolf scratches with saying, “oh! ‘Tis but a flesh wound I see!” (He seemed really proud of himself with that one). And he kept calling Nico a “padawan”? What even was that?

Yet, despite the utter confusion that had overtaken Nico, it was a good distraction. Will had or hadn’t brought a laugh out of him a couple of times. Nico was or was not starting to feel a lot more comfortable, especially with Will around.

And the string they shared absolutely was not glowing more warmly with each passing moment they spent together. Of course not. Never.

~~~

After that checkup, Nico offered to help around the infirmary. He did this, of course, hoping that his complete lack of any medical knowledge and “aura of death” would be enough for Will to refuse the offer.

He did not.

Figures.

What Will did do however, was introduce anyone and everyone imaginable to Nico. Whether that be random patients, his siblings, his Roman siblings that he (being the social-magnet-golden-retriever that he was) had gotten close with after the war, or some poor soul that happened to be within the vicinity of the two of them. It was weird. Nico didn’t know how to feel. Nobody had treated him like a person they could show others to. He was usually hidden away. Chose to keep himself hidden away.

Nico was starting to like being seen though. It helped that Will was there too. Unlocking the prison of isolation Nico had made for himself and dragging him into interactions when they were in the middle of filing paperwork. When he introduced Nico to a new person, he almost sounded proud. Like knowing Nico was something they could envy about Will.

“Oh hey [person] have you met my friend Nico?” Will would say. “Yeah he’s the coolest kid in camp! Go on Nico say hi,” pride radiating from his voice. “We met a few days ago when he almost stabbed me haha. He really saved my skin out there. Even if he was seconds away from passing out while doing it.”

Nico would never admit it, but he kind of liked the attention Will was giving him. It was as if Will’s words of affirmation were able to fight off the self-doubt demons would otherwise occupy much of Nico’s thoughts.

Not only that, but he also liked meeting people.

Yes. Him. Nico di Angelo. The son of Hades. Well known social recluse. Enjoying the communion of others.

Was that new? He thought he was an introvert to the core. The idea of people was supposed to make him want to hide under a rock a perish. Was it just that he was so much of a social outcast that he fooled himself into thinking that?

Dear gods, he was not going to spend the time going down that rabbit hole any further.

Nico felt a tug on his string finger. Will had started doing that in order to touch Nico without touching him. Nico hadn’t decided yet how he felt about it. Well, his heart obviously had, but he’s choosing to ignore that stubborn organ in all matters pertaining to Will. He looked up, slowly bringing himself back to reality.

Back to the storage/office room they were (as Will had put it) “chillin’” in. Back to the smell of antiseptic spray and old files. Back to the blonde idiot staring into his soul, seemingly trying to solve a puzzle.

“…what?” Nico broke the silence.

Will stared for a beat longer. “You were staring off into space for a while. Are you ok?”

He thought for a moment too long.

“Yes,” was the response Nico decided on.

Will stared even deeper with a curious look. “…ok… sure. What were you thinking about then?”

Nico was just about to bark out a basic response of “oh nothing”, or something like that, but he stopped himself. He didn’t need to hold himself back. Not when Will was looking at him in that eager and open way that he does.

“I was thinking about how much in my life has changed,” since you entered into it, “in the past few days.”

Maybe he didn’t say the whole truth, but Will was enough to make him no outright lie.

“Really?” Will backed off some, face turning from questioning frown to genuine smile. “How so?”

Oh. So this was gonna be some cheesy heart-to-heart, was it? Nico was not opposed to that idea. He looked back up at Will’s bright expectant eyes.

He actually rather liked the idea.

He talked to Will. He was trying to keep it short (Will was always busy) but the more he talked, the more they kept talking. And talking. And talking. Somehow they moved from life the last few days to life in the past few years. Family, in all possible definitions of the word. Friends, in all their shades, hues, and complexities. Enemies, in all their surprising humanity.

Will’s voice changed depending on what he was saying. He slurred together his words when they were talking about old interests. He would pause or stutter when they transitioned to deep topics, and slowed down when they got comfortable there. His voice got all jittery and slightly more high pitched when he was excited about something.

And the way he listened… the way it felt like he hung onto every word Nico said like it was written in scripture…

Nico kept wondering when Will would leave. He would find some excuse about having to check up on a patient, or outright say he didn’t want to stay there.

Wouldn’t want to stay with you. Why would anyone want to spend time with you. You’re boring him and he will leave you—

But Will hasn’t left. How long has they been there? They sat down on a nearby desk a while ago. Will was still with him.

Will, talking about his mom and how much he misses her. Will, listening to Nico’s stories of his childhood in Italy. Will, leaning into the beats of silence that would occasionally fall between them with a rare comfort. Will, inching closer to Nico with each passing second. Will, making their string glow impossibly brighter with the effect he had on Nico. Will, coiling the string around his fingers until there was no space between his and Nico’s hands. Will, cutting himself off mid-sentence just to graze Nico’s hand.

Will. Will. Will.

How long had it been? It was dark outside. Not that Nico cared. In the moment all that Nico cared about was right by his side, chatting animatedly, listening with care, leaning against Nico as he got more tired. Nico couldn’t imagine falling asleep now. His heart was beating so fast one would think he was about to be killed by some monster.

For some reason this moment felt more important than any of those past life-or-death experiences. He was safe. Nobody was in danger. But all those times he was fighting to live. Now he’s living to be alive.

With Will.

He looked over at the boy now resting on his shoulder and smiles. His mouth slightly open and he’s just barely snoring. It’s adorable. Nico’s heart warms with affection.

Affection. He liked using that word in this moment. He smiled.

He liked using that word for Will.

~~~

The Apollo Cabin did not cut him any slack when he brought a sleeping Will back in a bridal carry late into the night.

~~~

“Hey! It’s Mr. Perfectly Fine!” Will exclaimed to his siblings when Nico had entered the infirmary office.

Nico had caught a glimpse of Will hunched over his desk, with an exhausted expression written on his face just as Nico had walked in. It seemed like he was talking to his siblings, Kayla and Austin, about how he can “totally handle all this work” and that he’s “not burnt out”. They however, were willing to drop that conversation to snicker at Nico regarding whatever it was Will had just said.

“Seriously? You have no other jokes,” Nico retorted. “What is that referencing? I’m convinced you’re making it up at this point.”

“Oh please, at this point it’s your fault for not being a part of the Taylor Nation,” Kayla chimed in.

“I’ve been here for two days!”

Kayla crossed her arms. “That’s two whole days of Taylor Swift that you could have been listening to.”

Nico rolled his eyes and looked to Austin, the one person left who hadn’t taken a side against him.

“What?” He responded. “They’re right. All the effort you’ve made to avoid Taylor Swift is really some Kanye behavior.”

Nico hated his past self. Why did he decide to start hanging out with the Apollo Cabin? They were one mess of snarky comebacks joined together by their obsession over various musicians.

“I’ve been helping out! Would you really rather have me be wasting oxygen while listening to Swift?” Nico asked the cohesive mass.

“Yes!” They all shouted in (a partially harmonized) unison.

Nico groaned and sat on the chair he had placed next to Will’s desk the last time he was in this office. He’s only been here for three days and yet he has a spot for him. Next to Will.

The siblings talked about some infirmary stuff. Work schedules, post-war stuff, some new Roman ailments they learned about. Nico tuned it out, picking at his hangnails.

Some time later, the door Nico had just come through slammed open with an uninterested Drew Tanaka on the other end.

“Hey shitheads! I need drugs!” She said.

Nico raised an eyebrow at her and turned to look at Will, hoping he would translate.

Without looking up from his desk, Will rolled his eyes and said, “Sweet baby Zeus, can’t you just say ibuprofen like a normal person?”

He pushed back on his chair to get up, but Kayla pushed him right back.

“Nuh-uh. I’ve got this. You stay here and take a break with your,” she looked at Nico, “dude-best-friend.” She winked at him.

She headed out the door, with Drew on her heels.

The three left in the room looked at each other. A silent conversation played out between Will and Austin that lasted for much longer than a silent conversation has any right to last. Nico was glad to not be involved in it, whatever it was.

Austin sighed. “I guess I’ll go with them to make sure they don’t blow anything up.”

“Again,” Will added.

With a quick finger-gun-snap to his brother, Austin left.

The door creaked it as it closed.

“Wait,” Nico put his elbows on the desk. “How many explosions have they caused?” He thought for a second. “How do they even cause explosions to happen?”

He waits for a second more. Will is writing something down. Nico probably shouldn’t have interrupted by talking. He needed to be more conscious about his actions. Especially now that he is friends with Will. What was it Kayla said? “Dude-best-friend”? Yeah. He needed to be a better dude-best-friend. Not that they were “best friends”. It was probably just some slang or something. If they were even considered to be best-

Thunk.

Will face-planted onto his desk.

“Shit.” How long had he been working? “Are you ok?”

Will held up a hand to give a thumbs-up before dropping it back down to his desk. Will started snoring.

Nico knew there was a right way to react to this. Will probably had the answer for him. But Nico couldn’t find it in himself to do anything but stare. Stare and think. Like he was moving in slow motion but the rest of the world wasn’t kind enough to take note.

Was this normal for Will? Did he just collapse at his desk from time to time? No. He was always preaching his gospel of “taking care of yourself” and whatnot. This had to be a one-off thing.

He’s probably fine, right? Sure, he’s probably a little bit burnt out, but it’s not life and death or anything.

Yeah good idea. Bury your problems. Maybe one day you’ll share a grave with them.

How could he even think like that? “Not life and death,” so many things are not life and death but they are still worth worrying about.

Nico is a terrible friend. He needs to be worrying more about Will. Will needs help.

And how the hell do you expect to help him? Name one time you weren’t a burden to somebody. Every time you try to do something it fails. Just stop.

Gods. He was pathetic. His friend was passed out in front of him, and he was standing there, frozen. He should do something. He needed to do something. He just. He- he had to-

You always let people down. You’re too pitiful to help anyone.

No! He could help!

Will laid there fully unaware of the warfare happening in Nico’s mind. Someone looking in would likely find his state of rest to look peaceful. He was just a tired kid doctor in a tiny room filled with papers and files.

Outside that room was a couple of teenagers bickering about ibuprofen and explosives. It was a conversation severely lacking in context for the onlookers not in said conversation.

Even further beyond there were children doing dangerous and mundane activities. Somewhere a kid first encountered a monster. A man proposed to his girlfriend to the joy of an entire restaurant. A man proposed to his boyfriend to the shock, disgust, and joy of a small park. A child wrote a letter that never got read to her father fighting in a war. A species that was never discovered went extinct. A group of teenagers got high on the roof of a parking lot. A tired mother decided to quit smoking for the third time that year. A grandparent met their first grandson.

And back in that small room with too much paper and a sleeping boy, a damaged kid sees nothing but the worst of it.

Nico’s mind is a tunnel with no light at the end; flashing horrors crowding it out and letting no logic or hope in.

This was life-or-death. If Nico didn’t do something, he would be responsible for whatever happened to Will.

Will would know what to do. If Nico just knew Will better. If he just payed a bit more attention while Will worked. He must have been a terrible friend, having not cared enough to know how to handle this.

Finally, something you’re right about.

Gods! How could he even be drowning in this self pity now? Will needed help. He needed… caffeine? An intervention? He needed something and Nico needed to help. He could help. He needed to help. He needed-

His hand met a warmth. He looked down to see his and Will’s hands touching. Nico didn’t know when he started reaching for his hand. He let it sit there for a few beats of tense, heavy, warm silence.

His fingers moved without his consent to gently coil their string.

People say that, for soulmates, strings are able to pass emotions. The way one touches their string and the feeling they have while holding it are felt by the person on the other side.

Nico could… send some comfort? The thoughts would have made him laugh in any other circumstance. Him. Being the bringer of comfort. But in this instance, he could. There wasn’t anything else he coulddo.

No you cannot. You will lead yourself to heartbreak.

Will groaned. Nico flinched.

His hand twitched to reach out. To let Will know that “I’m here”. That “you can talk to me”.

You can’t do that.

He couldn’t do that though.

You don’t know how to comfort people.

He didn’t even know how to comfort people.

Just look in front of you, you let this happen under your watch.

He’d let this happen.

And here you are thinking to yourself instead of doing anything.

Gods! He just needed to focus. Think of some solution.

Just think! Just think! Just think! Just-

A door opened and Nico’s throat dropped, feeling like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have done. Which was stupid. He knew that.

He uselessly held his hands up and backed up, turning to the door. His body was frozen as thoughts of the thousands of ways the next few seconds could go all competed for his attention. He was a deer in the headlights, weakly looking past the person who was on the other end of the door. They looked at the scene in the room and raised an eyebrow.

“Nico? What happened?” Austin asked.

Austin! Thank the gods! He can-

“Help.” Nico creaked. “I don’t know what happened. Will, he…” Nico cut himself off. His throat was so choked up it was barely letting him say anything. It hurt. He didn’t realize he was this close to tears.

Fucking baby.

Austin rushed to his brother’s side and after a few moments sighed a breath of relief. “He’s fine. Just exhausted.” He took a few moments to give Nico a worried look. “Are you fine?”

Nico couldn’t respond. His body was still in fight-or-flight mode. He could only hear the pounding of his heartbeat, so strong it was like it was coming directly from his ears. There was to much happening. He just needed to calm down. He also had to respond. He had to look normal. He had to help with-

“Everything is fine.” The mantra he repeated in his mind. “He’s just exhausted. He’s ok. I’m ok.”

No you’re not. No he’s not.

Austin just confirmed that there was nothing to worry about.

You just don’t care enough about Will to keep worrying for him.

“I’m ok,” he finally responded, voice even more shaky.

Austin made a doubtful look and walked over to a shelf, pulling out some ball. He handed it to Nico, placing it in a hand he had not realized was shaking until then. He squeezed it and it was cushiony, but firm.

“Breathe with me,” Austin said simply.

And they breathed together. Slowly in. Holding it. Slowly out. Holding it.

After a minute or so he asked “would you mind if I brought Kayla here too?”

Shrugging, Nico lied. “I don’t mind. I’m fine really.” Although he didn’t know why he was still trying.

“No, you’re not.”

Austin steps out of the room and sticks his head out the door, peering down the corridor. “Kayla!”

Nico heard a muffled, “What?! I’m busy!”

Again shouting back, “Just come over here please!”

Some shuffling. Some footsteps. “What’s up?”

Austin stepped aside and let her view the scene. Her eyes softened and she walked over towards where Nico stayed standing.

“Oh Gods Nico, what’s wrong?” She asked him.

He tried for a dry laugh. “Nononono I’m fine. I was just a little-“ he choked. He hopelessly tried to steady his voice. “Just a little worried for Will is all.”

Kayla’s eyes immediately went wide with panic at the mention of his brother’s name. “What happened? Is he ok?” She looked over to his desk.

Austin stepped up to his sister, putting a hand on her arm. “He’s alright Kay. Just a little exhausted,” he said. They looked like they were having a silent conversation for a moment after that ended when they both looked back at Nico.

“Do you want to sit and talk for a bit?” Austin eventually asked.

“It doesn’t have to be about anything important,” Kayla added. “Or anything at all. Like, if you need silence with company we got you. Or silence without company. Or company without silence. Or any other combination. Or some other secret option. Or-“

“Company without silence is just the first choice you said,” Austin interrupted

Kayla thought for a second. “It is, isn’t it? It feels like there should be more combinations of those words though.”

“No company with no silence.”

“Ok but does that actually make any sense? Unless you talk to yourself professionally you wouldn’t be alone and without silence.”

“I would say that I can be alone without silence. I’m an interesting guy, I have fun talking to myself.”

“Yeah well, you’re just lonely so-“

A laugh escaped from Nico. They both looked at him.

“Sorry,” he said, for once with a steady voice. “The way you guys talk to each other is really funny to watch.” It reminded him of how he was with Bianca when they were younger. They used to argue all the time, sometimes escalating into screaming matches. Their mother would always step in and say something wise and meaningful that completely went over Nico and his sister’s heads. If Bianca were both alive now, would it be like this? Would their arguments not be out of malice but sibling love? What would that have looked like with them?

Kayla rested an arm on her brother’s shoulder as he looked at her with fake disgust. “We are, aren’t we?” She asked him.

“I really don’t think you’re ‘funny’. If anything funny looking.”

Kayla walked over to a circular table and sat down. “Oh please. I’m the hottest sibling. No contest.”

Austin followed her, taking a seat for himself. “If that’s what you want to believe, I will let you continue living with that lie.”

Kayla scoffed and looked back at Nico. “Wanna join the order of the round table?”

Yes.

“I uh… Are you sure it won’t get in the way of,” he waved his hand around at the general vicinity, “infirmary duties?”

“Not really,” Austin answers. “We did rounds this morning and everybody just needs more time to heal with the meds and magic,” which he embellished with spirit fingers, “and we already gave them their afternoon doses. Unless there’s some random emergency-“

“Or Drew comes back demanding drugs again,” Kayla added.

“Or that, then we’re just chilling.”

Nico wanted to say yes.

Don’t fool yourself kid. They don’t want you there. You’re just being a burden. They seem to be having a great time without-

Nico squeezed the ball. He moved to the table. He smiled and they smiled back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Author’s Note:

thank you so much for reading!! To that one person who commented on my last fic saying they needed more: thank you specificially. And I’m sorry specifically for you because the wait for the next one is going to be worse than a cartoon hiatus. Tho I’m actually going to be spending that time writing instead of feeling guilty for not writing to that’s a win. also I have an Ao3 now so that’s cool

#solangelo #pjo #nico di angelo #percy jackson #will solace #solangelo fics

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abyzou-abmmaron · 2 years ago

Text

Dante x Reader

Fem!Reader.

For contest: Reader is a demon hunter

——————

Prompt: You had a huge crush on the boy, Nero, but after a broken heart when he confessed his love for Kyrie, you found yourself to be going out with Dante for drinks in a weird attempt to get the boy out of your head.

Warning: A bit of angst, SFW, body insecurity, age gap

[Reader is 20-25 and Dante is 42-47]

——————

There you were again, texting Nero, ‘listening’ to his thoughts and how he loves Kyrie, he is more than happy to share everything that made him fall for Kyrie. Everything you were not.

He can’t help it, it is not his fault. He doesn’t know about your feelings, for him you see him as he sees you and nothing more, he genuinely likes you, just not as you wish he did. If he knew everything he would make sure to treat you differently to avoid hurting you, yet you are not brave enough to tell him the truth, so you stick with the love advice and cry in your room.

It got to the point where Nico realized what happened, she was such a great friend, she could smell your depression and low self esteem from afar and quickly made a move to help you.

Living with Nero and her in her van wasn’t helping at all, it made it worse, you could see how happy the boy was and that killed you. Nico loved having you around but it was killing you. She took the opportunity (called “Nero is not here, you will talk about it!” inside her head) and walked towards you, grabbing the phone from your hands.

“Y/N, I will, politely, kick you out of my van for a while!” - She said

“W-what?! Why?? You know I am not doing good an-“

“No worries, sweetheart, we are going out, girls night, you need it. I honestly don’t know what you saw on that boy, he is annoyingly angry all the time”

“He’s not like this with her…”

“Oh girl, it is worse than I thought” - Nico grabbed you by the arm and managed to make you dress up, making sure you wore no makeup so you don’t have anything to ruin with tears.

You loved how Nico just genuinely got worried about you.

After a few minutes you two got out of the van, you were put together, well dressed, it even made you feel a little better.

Entering the famous “Drunken Sailor” bar you two don’t take long to grab some drinks and hear straight to the pool table.

“Hey! Look what we have here!” - You hear a familiar voice and turn around.

“Dante!!” Nico says and runs to give him a high five. “You came!”

“You invited him?” You said to Nico, giving him a wave.

“Oh come on, I live girls night” - Dante replied. “I heard you have a broken heart to heal, let’s drink everything this bar has.”

“You fucking told him?!” You say.

“Oh, y/n, don’t worry, I did not tell him it was because of Nero” Nico said

“NICO!! YOU JUST DID!!” You scream-whisper to your friend.

Dante burst out laughing.

“Nero? Oh y/n I thought you had better taste, what did you see in him” Dante grabbed a beer and took a sip after the sentence.

“Oh lord I feel so embarrassed right now” - You try to hide your shame behind your hands. Needless to say you failed.

🪰🪰🪰🪰🪰🪰🪰🪰🪰

After a while, you three were sitting on a couch with a few empty cups on the table at the Devil May Cry, Nico was so wasted it didn’t take long for Dante to convince her to go take a nap upstairs.

It was 4 AM, you were drinking soda to stop the dizziness, Dante was on the couch, feet up on the table. He decided to break the silence.

“So… Y/N… You have a thing for Nero then. How come?”

“What do you mean?” He could hear the drunkenness from your voice.

“What made you feel like this? Nico mentioned how bad you were feeling, I kinda got worried about it, you are always so nice to everyone, you helped me a lot during missions.”

“Fuck Nero! Fuck him! Fuck this feelings! Fuck everything!” The alcohol made you a bit angry, but you did mean what you said. It’s been weeks that you were feeling bad, you just wish it could stop.

“Woah, where did this come from?” Dante laughed a bit.

“I don’t know, I’m just tired”

“Of what?”

“Of feeling like this, of always being the second option. Everyone I like doesn’t like me back, it’s been like this ever since I’ve been here.”

“Woah, I didn’t… I… I’m sorry, y/n'' Dante fixed his posture, now sitting with his elbows on his knees and facing you. “Look, you are gorgeous, funny, smart and a great friend, fuck even Vergil likes you, that man likes no one”.

“Tell him to drop his skincare routine if he really does” You say

Dante laughs.

“Oh man, see? You’re amazing y/n.”

“Thanks for the words, but I don’t believe you.” You get ready to get up when he grabs you by the arm.

“Hey hey hey, calm down kid, you are drunk, believing in what I said or not, I can’t let you walk home by yourself that way.”

“What? No. I am not going home, Nero’s there, I’m heading towards your fridge dummy.”

“Oh” He laughed and let you go. “Okay then.”

“I don’t want to see him for a while, or talk to him, but I have no better place to be or better stuff to do.” You said, grabbing a cup of water. “If I pay the rent, can I stay here?”

“You are drunk, we can discuss it after you sober up, Kid”

“Come on Dante” you are now heading towards the sofa again. “I can pay it.”

“I am sure you do, you are actually very responsible, but don’t make drunk deals, y/n”

“Dante, I am just tired, I want to make something about it, I can’t feel like this anymore I hate it.”

“Oh shit I am gonna regret this” Dante mumbled to himself while rubbing his hand on his face. “Sure you can stay for a while, until you manage to forget my dumb ass nephew.”

“Thanks, grandpa” You mocked him.

“Hey! I am not 50 yet!” He laughed.

“You want me to call you Daddy?” You did not realize the double meaning of what you just said, but Dante did.

“I might… be too old for you? That way??” Dante blushed and nervously laughed.

Just then you realized what you just said.

Blushing, you replied. “No, that was not what I meant. I was jus-“

“It’s okay, I am too much of a dirty mind”

“Wow, I got rejected again, even though I wasn’t really flirting” The alcohol and the low self esteem made you feel bad again, the situation wasn’t that deep, yet you couldn’t stop feeling this bad about yourself.

Dante felt bad for taking this the way he did, now he feels stupid.

“That was not what I meant, I was also joking… I just… You just took me off guard, that is all. I’m sorry y/n”

“Hm” You replied. It did not matter what he said, you were feeling too bad about yourself to care.

“Y/n, I mean it, I wasn’t trying to make you feel rejected”

“Yeah. I don’t know Dante. I feel like an unattractive blob right now”

Dante stood up right in front of you, putting both his hands at both your cheeks in an awkward way, making you look at him.

“Fuck I am going to regret this, but, listen kid, you are attractive as fuck! I wish I could kiss you since I’ve met you. But you are friends with my nephew, that would be awkward as hell. That boy is a pussy, ever since I realized the way you looked at him I got angry, like, what did he do to steal the attention of such a woman? It makes me feel bad that you feel so disgusted about yourself, you shouldn’t base how worthy you are based on how men want you. Yet, here I am, saying that I wish I could kiss you right now.”

“You are lying” Tears begin to form in your eyes “You are trying to make me feel better”

“I do am making you feel better, but don’t call me liar, y/n”

“I do not believe in y…”

“Can I kiss you then?”

“W-what?” You were confused and scared.

“Come on, can I? I understand if you don’t wa-“

You grabbed his shirt and pulled him for a kiss, it was your first, and he could tell by how nervous you were and how awkward it was.

That made it even better for him.

You could feel his smile and it made you stop.

“No~ Why would you stop? That was so good” His voice melted. “Can we do it again?”

“Y-yeah, we… we can”

That night you realized that Nero really wasn’t that big of a deal, but holy shit how good it was with Dante.

“We can watch a movie if you want to too.” Dante said.

“Let’s stick with the kissing please, for now, Dante.”

“If you insist”

#dmc devil may cry #fanfic #dmc x reader #dante x you #dante x reader #dante sparda x reader #fluff #dmc fluff #dmc x oc

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twoidiotwriters1 · 9 months ago

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The Curse of Oenone (Leo Valdez xFem!Oc)

A/N: THEM -Danny Words: 1,956 Series' Masterlist Previous Chapter // Next Chapter Listen to: 'If It Wasn't (For You)' -by Jacob Noah

XXIX: Emotionally Repressed by Day, Socially Inept by Night

Leo makes a beeline to the control panels and sets the Archimedes sphere back in place. Ara hangs her Octopi over one shoulder and makes her way to the stairs, but then she spots Nico.

He's usually at the top mast or in Hazel's room until it's time for bed and he leaves to... wherever he sleeps. But he's leaning against the stern's handrail today, looking right at her. Ara lets out a heavy sigh, he wants to talk to her, and it won't be fun.

"What?" She asks.

Nico eyes her before replying. "You got your stuff back?"

Ara leans on the railing and stares at the sea. "You ate?"

"Yeah, the birthday cake they made for you," he replies sarcastically. "I thought you'd died so I didn't want to waste it."

Ara lowers her gaze. "Did you tell them?"

Nico snorts. "I thought you would've told them all about you by now, that's how it always is with you."

She makes a face. "Some of it, not all. But Leo knows it all. He was always asking for stories and Jason had no memories, so I had to give him context."

Nico looks at her with a sarcastic smirk she's grown to loathe. "Bet it felt good to be someone's hero at last."

"Can we not do this today?" Ara groans. "Tomorrow we can do the whole thing all over but... it's the worst birthday of my life, man. I'm already going through it. Can't you enjoy in silence?"

That seems to bother Nico. "I take no pleasure in seeing you suffer, Ara. It annoys me that you try so hard to be something you're not."

"What are you talking about?"

"You can be who you are unapologetically and for some reason, you prefer to walk around in that stupid cloak, completely unlike you, and it makes you miserable—"

"The cloak gives me purpose—"

"Nemesis talked to you, right? Hazel said you never told them who you saw, so who was it?"

She hates having to look up when talking to Nico, he's a year younger than her and yet he could get half the things she's gained way easier. He could be happy, and he could've been the friend Lily needed when Ara failed her. Now both of them left their friend alone, standing on the remains of their broken promises.

"That is none of your business," she says tensely.

Nico's gaze is unwavering. "I talked to Achilles before taking Percy, and what he said—"

"Let me guess," Ara tilts her head, an ironic smile on her lips. "Something about ambition being our worst enemy or whatever? You're too late, Hercules already warned me about it."

The boy frowns. "I can't believe you chose to follow their path. Every win they got sent innocent people to their early graves."

Ara's heart stings at his comment. "Don't talk about them like that."

"I'm talking about you, you should know better," he glares at her. "You saw Percy take risks for nothing, you saw Mike die thanks to it. Beckendorf, and Bianca—" He cuts his speech short, turning away, then clears his throat forcefully. "You and Lily treat your birthdays like they don't matter, and all I can think is... she can't even have that."

He lets out a dry laugh and shakes his head.

"'Course—she joined the hunters before dying, so she would still be twelve years old no matter what." Nico runs a hand over his face and squeezes his eyes shut. "She wasn't allowed to grow old, but you are, and don't want to."

It would be easier to stab his soft spots until he shows his fangs again, but she can't bring herself to do it. Ara's lost her brother, Annabeth, and Leo is next. She's tired of the fights.

Ara moves slowly to make sure he knows what she's doing, giving him the chance to step back. He doesn't. The boy takes a shaky breath, keeps his eyes closed, and lets Ara absorb some of his hurt. As soon as she does, her heart squeezes in a way that takes the air out of her lungs, she tries to talk, but her throat is tight with grief.

Nico relaxes only enough to keep talking. "I know it sounds... cruel... but I'm glad she's not with them. I prefer missing her than resenting her my entire life."

"I regret not convincing her to stay," Ara admits hoarsely. "We were the same age, but Bianca was braver. If I'd taken my lessons seriously since the start, I could've shown her what camp could offer us..."

"Us?" He opens his reddened eyes, still scowling at her.

"Orphan kids." She looks down in shame. "I wasn't a hero, Nico, you're right. I chose what was best for me. I'm sorry."

It's the first time she apologizes to Nico. It might be the grief she's absorbed, but Ara couldn't phantom the extent of Nico's pain until now, it feels just like when she lost Mike. She never showed regret, if anything, she'd made it clear that she thought nothing of Bianca. Now her words are coming out like they had been lying there for ages, rotting her core.

The way Nico reacted when Percy told him about Bianca, now that he and Annabeth are in Tartarus, she understands it. He's the only person on this ship who shares her anger and doesn't treat it like a scary thing.

The girl cleans her nose with the back of her sleeve. "I shouldn't say it now that I have their blessing, but I hated them for a while too. When Jason came and Thalia found him I realized it was you and Bianca all over again. My fate is to watch everything fall apart."

Nico stares at her, sighs tiredly, and dries her tears, his knuckles are cold against her skin but surprisingly gentle, which makes her feel even guiltier for all the times that she's punched his face. For the first time, he looks worried for her.

"It's okay if you don't want cake," he says. "But you should eat. The Kerkopes handed your ass to you."

Ara sniffs again. "I'm taking this conversation as you wishing me a happy birthday, so I'll say 'What the Tartarus you mean by 'happy', you jerk? Read the room', then I'll walk away and you can insult me and we can pretend this didn't happen."

"Tu sei sciocca."

Someone clears their throat in front of them and Ara looks back, spotting Leo. He's looking at them weirdly. Ara realizes she's holding Nico's hand. "You had issues putting the sphere back in place?" She asks, letting go of the boy.

Leo glances at Nico before replying. "Came to ask if we should hold a meeting now or wait until tomorrow."

It's not like she's enjoying her birthday, but she's not in the mood to hold a second meeting today. "Let's call it a day. I'm tired."

Leo nods, unable to shrug off the jealousy. "Yeah, I'm tired too."

Nico walks past them. "I'll take the night watch."

"Thank you," Ara says kindly. Her boyfriend frowns at their behavior but says nothing.

Leo comes to her cabin before sundown, and Ara makes room for him to sit. The boy enters reluctantly, like he'd rather be somewhere else.

"What you saw," she starts right away. "It's nothing."

Leo pulls out screws and wires from his belt and braids them to avoid her eyes. "Looked like something..."

"I can explain it," Ara pouts.

"Forget it," When he smiles it looks genuine, but the girl knows it's not real. "Came to give you a present."

"Oh?" She blinks. "You didn't have to..."

"You thought I'd let the day pass by?" The boy raises a brow. "I'm better than that!"

"Well, it was a busy day," Ara chuckles. "What is it?"

"I'm new to this whole getting-presents-for-my-girlfriend thing, and you're not easy—you don't have hobbies outside pretending to watch movies with me," he teases her.

The girl tilts her head with amusement. "So?"

"So... I'm a mechanic and an inventor. I could build you the weapon of your dreams," he makes a face. "Then I realized Almighty is pretty much it—I was going through my options and it wasn't looking great..." Leo rambles.

"I don't care for presents," she admits. "I spend all my birthdays in camp, so it's more like a day to do whatever I want—"

"I know," he interrupts her. "I know you're all about practicality and utility."

He pulls an item out of his tool belt: a black hair tie. It's decorated with a bronze dove, the wings spread open like it's either taking flight or landing. Leo holds her hand and places it around her wrist.

"Then I thought, Ara is always losing her scrunchies, her hair is always on her face while we're fixing stuff—and I know it drives you crazy. So I made you this."

He presses on the dove's breast and moves back when it expands, creating a large shield with an Omega engraved at the front. Ara turns her arm to examine it, her mouth falling open. "What!"

"Hercules and Achilles had stuff made for them. You needed a shield," he says, fidgeting with scraps from his belt as he waits for a full reaction. "I know your compass turns into a shield but if you needed to also use it as a sword you'd be... though you aren't helpless and also have Lily's dagger but..."

While Leo rambles, Ara turns her arm and spots a bronze buckle on the leather strap. She snaps it open and the shield goes back to being a hair tie. The girl throws her arms around his neck. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Leo stops talking and laughs, vividly glowing. It's like the setting sun is shining directly on him through the porthole window. His arms wrap around her waist. "Don't mention it."

Ara cups his face, a bunch of annoying butterflies making her mind fuzzy. "It must've taken you ages, I don't know what to say..."

He smirks. "Took me like a month, it wasn't that hard—but if you insist I wouldn't mind a few kisses if you're that grateful."

Ara kisses his face and neck effusively, making him giggle like a little kid, then she finds his lips and Leo makes a vastly different noise at the contact. This day doesn't seem so bad now.

"Y'know..." he mumbles in between kisses. "If you really feel like thanking me, you can give me my present in advance?" He pulls her close, and Ara blushes down to her neck.

"What?" She squeaks.

Leo laughs. "I'm just messing with you."

"Don't joke like that!" She tries to escape his grip.

The boy grabs her chin and gives her another kiss, falling back with her on top. "Sorry, doll. Can't help it! I love how flustered you get."

Ara leans down and gives him a butterfly kiss, making him squirm a little bit. He's always been a big fan of small affectionate gestures, of any affectionate gesture, as long as it's Ara doing it. She pushes herself up and smiles. "También te amo. Now get out of my cabin."

Leo's eyes brighten. "No! Let me—let me hear you say that again!" He begs while Ara gets to the door. "Sunshine, let me stay over! It's your birthday!"

"Yeah, exactly. I want to sleep alone. Your birthday is in two days, if you want to sleep with me then, I'll comply."

Leo looks at her with a huge smile. "For real?"

"Well, I'm learning Spanish, which must mean I don't joke about commitment," Ara gestures at the exit again. "Now leave me alone."

"You're so rude," Leo says, though he sounds delighted. "I'll respect your autonomy today, but on my birthday, I'll have none of that. Be ready to have a Leo Valdez all over you on the 7th!"

The boy kisses her cheek effusively when he walks past, and Ara leans into it laughing. "The warning should go to the rest of our poor crew, not me."

"I don't love them enough to warn them."

Next Chapter –>

Taglist.

@siriuslysirius1107 @ask-giggles1303 @asnyox-the-hoarder @im-planning-something-look @bandshirts-andbooks @coolninjapaper @thewaterlily @whenisthefall @1randomcomic @you-bloody-shank @sunflowergraves @owlalex44 @taylordaughter @typicalsolangelolover @writingmia @espressopatronum454 @slytherinnqueen @orbitingpolaris @obxstiles @ellipsisspelled @thepixiechicksh

#twoidiots writing #pjo fanfic #leo valdez fanfic #doo #leo valdez x oc #heroes of olympus #percy jackson and the olympians

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iconoclast-infidels · 5 months ago

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Mostly Nico kept a slight grin as the old feeling of Dmitry's acceptance crept back into his soul. The way he simply found it obvious that he wouldn't keep him away from surfing elevators or exploring back alleys. Not everyone was like that and the casual way it was implied in general passing felt good. Nico could feel his life returning with every word, every step, like his outsider nature was finding it's sanctuary once again, the place he could be himself without his guard up. If only they weren't... here of all places. This was no home.

Nico tried to not dwell in the direction of the fridge either. The clear evidence there should have been no doubts in the direction of vodka managed a laugh from the halfling when he was a little on edge. It was the concept he was in the world Dmitry walked in without him. It hurt to stand in it. To Nico it was a place that shouldn't exist. But here they were.

"Of course. I really should have known. Ye of little faith. What can I say? Always have faith in vodka."

He kept trying to breathe and remain even as they took a tour of this life. It was plain harder than he expected to see it, feel it. It shook his insides far more than any veil ever could.

Then the chocolates got tossed at him. He caught it and grinned in that woo I got a think fast moment kind of way proud of himself. He tried to repeat the Russian word for it and asked, "Why do I just sound like I'm hawking a loogey every time I try to copy your Russian? I'll just say chocolate squirrels. It's cuter. Like my Mouskewitz over there." He said looking up at Dmitry a moment before checking out the shape of the chocolate again.

He decided to eat one while he watched the other pack up. They were shirts he didn't recognize. Time had passed. Just the fact they were items acquired during time they should have been happily married together and were gotten alone had a way of getting to Nico's heart. But, he stayed silent, mostly nodded if looked at, just tried to help reach for things if he wanted any help. He was starting to realize how much the next trip to see the Easter egg lady was going to hurt. He swallowed it down and knew he was going to have to face it or he'd never get through and passed it. Big breath.

Pills? Don't freak? Nico's chin was tilted down and his eyes up as he stared at Dmitry over that one. Then he looked behind himself. Then he looked to the right and then back to the left before going right back to Dmitry's face and pointing at himself. There wasn't anyone else in the room.

"You're talking to me?"

Then he laughed harder than he had since Dmitry had come back.

"That's a good one, Dmitry. I really miss you. Don't freak. Me? Over pills. You really had me going there for a minute. I'm more likely to ask you for some than to freak out." Then he just kept on laughing and laughing. That one really got him.

Then the best moment ever happened.

He watched Dmitry down some "drank" and actually agree to a fire. These were not shit talking boys for as much shit came out of their mouths daily.

He looked at the pack. "Well, we came all this way. We got the mug and the choco Chippendales, pills and vodka. Yeah, we got all the important stuff. Let's burn this bitch down."

Then he lit his lighter. There was no hesitation, no more time wasted. He looked at that empty bed though, the one Dmitry slept in without him. No. He didn't like this place at all. All the discomfort of being there crept up within him.

"Fuck this place." He said then threw the lighter with the cap open. It would take all but 1.5 seconds for that cheap lighter to combust against that old mattress igniting all the fluid inside it. It would sound like a bomb. But, Nico would barely flinch. He knew how combustable mattressess were from living in squaller.

There was a very monstrous fuck you written in the lines of his face as he watched the fire start to spread, the lights flicker against the walls of this prison. To make sure he took the other bottle and downed a drink himself only to spit part of it at the bed to aggrivate the fire. Another blaze would flame up.

Ah, that did it. Much better. Fuck this place. He'd stare at the bedborn inferno.

Whatever anxious and unwell feelings were churning inside Nico over this bed, that fridge, these rooms, this... this place... it all melted down his body. He could feel it go from his shoulders right down his back and into feet and all the way out to the mundane floors.

He'd look up at Dmitry with a new found sense of satisfaction and release of tension from his face. A much less masked smile, far more genuine. His whole body felt lighter with every step as he watched. "We should probably go, babe."

"Man, with how cold it gets here, I wouldn't doubt it," he agreed, shuddering at the idea of a cold hell. Infernal cold had to truly be something, and it wasn't anything he wanted to experience firsthand - ever.

Nico's optimism about creepy Moscow was very on brand, though. Dmitry nodded with a grin. "There's places, there's people, I wouldn't dare keep you from that. Like, me? Stopping you from wandering the back alleys? Nah, no way. There's elevators though! Just not in buildings like this one, unfortunately. Surfing's gonna have to wait, I'm afraid."

He listened to Nico's explanation about the fridge, a little surprised that the halfling was actually... hypothetically upset? about the possible contents or lack thereof? But he didn't really want to question it either, as it seemed like something serious and he didn't want to sadden Nico. But vodka- "Whaddaya mean 'unless' there's vodka? Dare I offend myself like this, cmon man."

"If there's one thing. Oh- that reminds me, here," he said opening a drawer in his bedroom and pulling out some chocolates. He unwrapped one and took a bite, offering Nico the rest, along with a few more pieces that were left, still wrapped. "Belochkas. Squirrels, but like, little, see?" he explained, mid-chewing.

He carried on grabbing the other items he had come there for, and with Nico's suggestion of an actual fire, decided to add a few more: two or three shirts, a pair of ripped jeans he'd liked, and after some deliberation, a small, unmarked bag bag with a handful of pills inside. "Don't freak, I couldn't sleep and after a while, that gets bad quick," he explained, figuring Nico would ask. "I can deal with seeing shit if you're with me, but not on my own."

He packed everything into NIco's volunteered backpack and then went to the kitchen briefly to fetch an unopened bottle of vodka like he'd promised Nico he had. He also grabbed a second, nearly empty one, "mine," he clarified, and drank half of what was left before offering the other half to Nico in case he wanted that.

With that done, he nodded. "Fire, then."

#nicoxdmitry #return #yes I spelled chippendales like that on purpose cuz of course nico would throw in a pun for chip n dale on the squirrels

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esha-isboogara · 2 years ago

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let me love you like a woman

the gangsta manga was actually incredibly good and i wish my ex didn’t have all the issues i gave him bc i want to read them again :( anyways though here’s some longer nico appreciation bc lord knows i would give my whole life for him

nicolas brown x afab!reader

nic and his lover reunite after what seems like a million years

☆no real warnings for this one

It was quite often that Nic was off on “buisness” and such trips usually took place over the span of multiple weeks , on rare instances even months.

Feeling his big strong arms wrap around her waist she smiled , enjoying the very presence of her beloved once again. Lonely days and nights now forgotten. The empty bed she had once had to lay upon would now have another body accompanying her.

“Get a room love birds. The whole world doesn’t want to witness the two of you making out in the middle of the street” Worick gagged mockingly receiving a dirty look from you as Nicolas placed you down gently. He was always so afraid of hurting you , afraid he wasn’t able to limit his strength. You admired him for it.

“Fuck you Worrick. You’re such a bitter old man”

“Ahh shut up I’m not gonna take this kind of treatment from the same chick who claimed to have cat like reflexes but fell off the top of a roof when a kid threw a baseball at ya”. He laughed ,leaning against the stone wall.

“That was one time ! I’m shocked you didn’t forget grandpa”. You retorted with a grin, taking Nic’s large hand in yours

“Aaaanywho I’m going to be kidnapping your partner for the rest of this fine evening …unless either of you gentleman have any complaint”.? An expectant look up at Nic who nodded , a small smile on his face

Dismissively Worrick waved the two of you off. “I could care less what the two of you get up to hell take him for the rest of this week if you wanna. Right now all I wanna do is lay down on my own bed and have a nice cold drink”. He paused for a moment looking you dead in the eye. “Bring him back in one piece okay ? And if you two are going to engage in “activities” do your best to keep it down the rest of us are trying to sleep”.

And with those final words of parting he was gone leaving you and Nicolas alone together.

You felt like a giddy teenager who was finally allowed to have a boy enter her room. A feeling excitement and sexual prowess filling your veins.

[Do you want to get dinner first. I have not eaten all week. Been busy] Nic signed , pointing down the road to a small ramen shop. It was one of cozier places within Estralum.

It did erk you that he tended not to eat as much on said “missions” but he was alive and healthy..ish so you weren’t going to waste your breath complaining. Nic wasn’t going to change regardless.

You shook your head. [I am going to cook your favorite meal tonight. I have things planned].

Nic smiled down at you again , embracing you in a warm embrace.

It was so nice to finally have that special someone who filled the emptiness within his heart. Twilights like him tend to be treated as pets by humans or just objects to fight in their petty wars. Never would he have thought a human would be the slightest bit capable of loving him. Of course he’d never let his guard all the way down in case of betrayal but he did hope to spend a good portion of his life by your side.

[Lets go quick].

•

Warm air met your skin as you entered your apartment throwing your jacket on the arm of the couch.

“It hasn’t changed”. Nicolas stated bluntly observing his surroundings.

“Well you haven’t been gone that long love , it’s only been about 11 days”.

[a lot can change in just a few days].

You dismissed his comment deciding to instead get things started in the kitchen. On normal circumstances you would sing softly to yourself as Nic rested on the couch or got up to his own things but tonight the two of you were all over eachother.

Similar to newlyweds.

[You know…I thought about you a lot when you were gone].

Nic raised an eyebrow in a mixture of amusement and curiousity

You turned the stove down low and turned to face him , placing the spoon in your hand down upon the counter.

[All day every day I thought of you].

[Is that so]?

You nodded. “I couldn’t wait till you got back and now”.

Nicolas tended to feel nervous when he got too comfortable with someone. There was always a chance of disappointment but with Y/n it was different. In the best way.

[I love you…so so much].

#more simping for nicolas brown #gangsta anime #gangsta x reader #gangsta #anime x reader #anime fluff #nicolas brown fluff #nicolas brown x reader #blurb #drabble #fluffy blurb #fluffy drabble #fluffy #oh how i love him #esha writes

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cosmicfireheart · 3 years ago

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Straight to Hell Pt. 2

Ship: Percy Jackson x Reader

Warnings: just a bit of crying towards the end.

Requested by: @msmissinghome

Author note: I swear I wanted to put a fight scene at the end, but I just couldn’t shake this thought that if I managed to get out of Tartarus, on my own, and then be hugged by Percy I would cry all my fears out. I’m sorry it took me so long, I tried to find a better ending.

Also @tobios-shawty here’s part two! I hope you like it!

Silence was a funny companion.

It had a way to make you uneasy, to creep inside your skin and force you to destroy it, to scream it away or to laugh your way through it.

Percy thought he would never be a prey to silence, after all, it was always the apocalypse around him, someone was always fighting (him for the most part), chasing, or running.

But right now, deep in the shadows, he couldn’t catch a single noise, he could barely register his grip on the back of Nico’s jacket as he shadow-traveled them.

What was that place supposed to be anyways?

Or, better yet,

How in Hades did Nico manage to find a path through it?

He didn’t know, and it didn’t matter much to him at the moment, his senses, his brain, his entire body was only focused on finding you, on getting you back.

Maybe on another circumstances he would’ve thought about how that same dark landscape would probably make for some really nasty nightmares, and yet, he doubted he would even remember it.

He was just finally adjusting at the darkness when the light came back, dazzling him.

And then Nico was on the floor, barely able to pull himself to his knees and hands, breathing heavily.

Percy took a calculated look around him, his right hand gripping Riptide tightly, he didn’t recognize his surroundings, but as far as he could tell, there were no monsters in sight “What happened? Are we there yet?”

The king of ghosts only replied with a sneer and a roll of his eyes

“What is that supposed to mean?” Percy asked as a sudden, all-too-familiar rage filled him, he couldn’t waste any more time, because what if you made it and he wasn’t there? You would’ve walked through Hell only for him to not comply on his side, not opening the doors on his side.

“Asshole” Nico mumbled “The doors are in Greece” he said as if it explained everything, Percy looked around, and even though the surroundings were new, probably somewhere in Italy, it wasn’t Greece.

“We aren’t in Greece yet” Percy added, the rage filling his every word with venom.

“We were just in Manhattan! Traveling here took almost all of my strength!” Nico yelled, breathing between words, and only in that moment did Percy fully acknowledge him, the bloody nose, panting, even the shaking.

He felt as though he was being stabbed with guilt over and over again, the entirety of his situation made his eyes water, but he forced the tears away rapidly, he didn’t deserve to cry, he scolded himself, besides, that would do nothing to either save you nor help Nico.

“I’m sorry” he apologized wholeheartedly “I’m just-“

“I know, just shut up and let me regain my strength so we can get to her” he cut right through his words

Percy bit his tongue until he felt a metallic taste and nodded, his eyes skipping trough the town they were in until something clicked, a building with very specific windows

“I know this place-“ he whispered to himself, trailing off at the end, there was no way he’d been there, and he didn’t have social media or watch enough TV to recognize it from anywhere.

Nico rolled his eyes again “I said-“ he trailed off looking at the same building “oh”

“Oh?” Percy repeated “You know this place?”

Of course he did, Percy rationalized, he’d probably been there before, but then again, why did Percy felt like he knew it too? Maybe some type of deja vu?

“You don’t?” Was Nico’s answer “She has a photo of this place that she parades with her wherever she goes, you must’ve seen it”

Oh, now the son of the sea understood the sentiment.

“I did, but she never really told me about this place”

Nico scoffed “Well of course she didn’t! She hated being here”

Percy had figured that much, you never talked about your childhood more than strictly necessary, sometimes even going out of your way to drive any conversation away from that topic.

But,

“Why?” He didn’t realized he wondered out loud.

“Her mortal parent, for starters, abandoning her” Percy realized Nico still looked angry, but now the anger wasn’t directed at him “forcing her to raise herself from childhood until she was taken to camp”

Still, it worried him further, that anger he was escaping was directed at one person that should’ve been close to you, someone who you should’ve relied on that abandoned you, pretty much like he thought he was doing by not being there with you already.

Gods he needed you.

But, he’d get you back, and once he did, he’d never let go of you again.

The resolve compressed his heart a little, but he accepted the feeling, from now on, you’d have someone to rely on that would never let you down.

That, he was willing to swear on the Styx.

***********

Had it been entire days or mere hours you just couldn’t tell.

Nothing really changed in Tartarus from the second you fell in, nothing but the multitude of monsters hunting you down.

Trying to track down the first demigod they’d seen since being killed by, most likely, another demigod just like you.

But your resolution never once wavered, you were getting out, one way or another, you hid until you had slaughtered one of them, not quite killing, just creating a gush big enough to sprinkle some ichor in your clothes, enough to change your scent but not so much as to tear through the entirety of the fabric.

Eventually, with a new limp, and a few ugly wounds that would soon enough turn into ugly scars, you got to the door.

A heavy sigh left you, and suddenly you became an anxious mess altogether What if Percy hadn’t made it? What if they finally realized that you didn’t belong with them? That after all you were still just walking anxiety coated on fear and deep rooted issues?

Maybe they’d finally realized that they’d be better off without-

You couldn’t allow yourself to keep thinking like that, you couldn’t give up on yourself because knowing them, they wouldn’t give up on you.

It was Percy Jackson for crying out loud! He wouldn’t give up on anyone! Less of all you.

So, with a burning throat after swallowing your fears and an ever growing tremble on your body did you step on the elevator.

And you waited.

And waited.

The fear was eating you whole when you felt it beginning to move.

You forced yourself to stand up, leaning against a corner for support and taking a hold of your weapon.

Then the doors open and you lunged forward, wanting nothing more than to get as further away from the entrance as you could.

“Whoa!” Exclaimed a voice you knew too well as your blue-green-eyed boy held your face

His eyes were finally letting go of all the tears he managed to contain, denying himself to even blink in case you’d disappear, he knew it was a stupid fear to have, but still, he wouldn’t dare to take the chance.

Suddenly you were pressed against his trembling body, it was a good match, you realized, with the both of you shaking there was a strange sense of stability.

“You’re okay, you’re here” he kept mumbling against your hair, over and over like a mantra or a prayer you couldn’t tell, it took you a moment to realize he was talking to himself.

“I’m out” was all you could say, a broken voice finding a way out of your closed off throat, it was funny how before that moment you’d wholeheartedly believed that your first thought after getting out would’ve been Percy.

It wasn’t.

Your first thought was how incredibly stupid you had been for jumping in the first place, I mean, of course you’d do it again but the matter at hand was that it was a very stupid move from your part.

Going to Tartarus? Where a thousand bloodthirsty monsters (who by the way had been killed by your kin) were? Poisoned air and burning rivers? The odds had been against you from the moment you landed!

By all means you shouldn’t have survived.

But you did, and finally all the tears you had suppressed came to life, Percy held you with unwavering arms as his own legs gave up and the both of you landed on your knees.

He held you as you screamed and yelled between tears, as you sobbed so much he thought you’d have an attack, because you were out of the woods now, all the fear and anger you suppressed could finally come out.

You hit him a few times but that was okay, he only held you tighter as his own sobbing became loud, breaking out all the way from his chest.

At some point in all the crying you felt an extra pair of arms around you, your first instinct made you stiffen until you saw black eyes full of worry, then you began crying again, and so did he.

Because now you were safe.

#heroes of olympus #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #percy jackson x reader #nico di angelo

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quietrainfan · 3 years ago

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Hey! Anyone want some heavy platonic Loceit angsty headcanons I've extracted from the new episode? Well, too bad because it's happening regardless. :)

Yes, also some Unsympathetic Patton. You know what blog you're on. (This interpretation/headcanon shall not die. Not here.)

(Also, this is going to combine my observations and thoughts as well, so sorry in advance if this post turns out as a bit of a mess.)

Alright, so! Orange Side confirmation. How we feelin', Sanders Sides fandom, how we feelin'?

Honestly, the Orange Side theory wasn't something I was really all that into. It was a 'meh, could be cool' headcanon for me personally. But I have to say the way the reveal was handled made me jump in my seat with pure joy. No joke, I audibly gasped when Logan's eyes flashed orange.

It was all downhill from there, I was excited. Anyone who knows me will tell you I'm a sucker for character's eyes glowing when they've reached their limit or are displaying a power they've never shown before, combine that with an unexpected reveal and I'm sold.

Plus, glowing eyes have been a common theme with Unsympathetic content and Dark Side headcanons so you could imagine how the first peak into the Orange Side's existence (or, rather confirmation. we all saw the 'hello' hint, Orange, you cheeky little munchkin.) was his color in Logan's eyes made me feel. It was so cool!!! Ah!

Then Thomas had to tease us again at the end card with our boy Orange's eyes popping up in the darkness, waiting for his chance to be too loud to ignore. Like, the audacity. Who do you think you are, Thomas?! (That was a joke. Sorry, I'm just really pumped.)

Also, Remus got quite a few laughs out of me. Ah, I missed him.

Okay, headcanon time! We're going to do Logan first, then Janus, then combine the two. Sound good? Alright, here we go (Trigger Warning for discussions of alcoholism, please if anything I write here sounds insensitive or inaccurate, let me know and I will edit. Also, no need to read if you don't want to. Stay safe.) :

Logan

Logan knew where to grab for that alcohol bottle.

I mean, I guess that makes sense since he lives there and is naturally the most observant Side. But...that bottle's placement was a little too convenient.

Sure it was played up as a joke and it was funny.

But something about the way Logan threw his coffee into the sink and quickly replaced it with the wine stuck out to me.

I've joked about Logan and/or Janus having to "drink to cope" due to sharing the single brain cell Thomas has amongst all the chaos. But seeing that in an actual episode, even as a gag, is kind of...different.

Let me explain.

This may be a common thing for Logan that he struggles with.

He wakes up early to be the first one to help Thomas start the day, naturally. Logan goes to make his cup of coffee and there's always the lingering urge to take a sip of wine before anyone can see because he just...can't face everyone without needing just a little bit of it to cloud out all the gross, petty, negative feelings he experiences every day around them.

He's logic. He can't be drinking and risk any more harm to Thomas's function.

So, it's a constant battle with coffee vs wine, coffee vs wine, coffee vs wine-

Most of the time Logan is able to resist and go with the coffee.

It doesn't make him feel good in the slightest. If anything it makes him feel even worse knowing he'll be more alert that day.

Logan hates that was even a thought at all. He needs to be alert. Otherwise everything will fall apart. He is the rock in the system and without him everything will crumble.

Such a selfish mindset. He needed to focus.

Other days Logan just doesn't have it in him to discard the wine regardless of how much he wants to.

He knows what the day holds for him. It was all so repetitive at this point. Logan knew when he wasn't able to get through it despite it all.

That didn't stop him from shaming himself for caving. He should be able to handle this. He's made so much progress with resisting it up to this point but today he through it away again because he just had to, right?

Sometimes Logan finds himself "cheating" by hiding a couple drops of wine into his coffee on days when he chose the coffee but later felt particularly bad about...a lot of things, into his second cup.

Logan more often times chooses neither. The temptation for clouding out the others was just too strong and was a waste of time.

Logan is beyond tired of the others.

Every single action they have agitates him now. No matter how minor it is.

Roman's loud voice and constant references makes Logan's toes unconsciously curl beneath his shoes. Even a silent warm smile and wave from the prince fills Logan with an unpleasant tingle in his knuckles.

Virgil's neverending foreboding and unnecessary nasty remarks that he doesn't even bother to filter provokes Logan's new habit of biting his tongue. Any kindness he ever gives him makes his stomach twist.

Patton's nicknames, poking for for a laugh, his "sweet" way of shoving away any objection he may have, how casually he behaves as if he isn't part of any problems- how quickly he's prepared to "bounce back". Logan feels like every word, action from him something steps on a guitar cord in the back of his mind that makes the ugliest, loud, screeching sound. He feels this strange warm fuzzy ache he can't define. All he hears is that cord playing faster and faster the longer he stays in their presence. Logan no longer trusts himself alone with Patton.

Logan thinks if he just separates from the others long enough, the ugly strumming noise will go away.

But he's so wrong.

Logan can hear it even when he's all alone. When it's finally silent, he still can't get rid of it.

It's loudest when Logan is alone in his room. Logan has lost count of how many nights he's spent clenching his head, quietly sobbing, and praying for it to just go away already.

Logan often feels like he's losing it.

On nights where the sounds are particularly louder than usual, he swears he can see orange shadows creeping around him, lights of the color flashing on and off, he sometimes even sees it seeping in and out of the cracks of his door like a thick fog. At times he'll even wake to it glowing absurdly bright through his window.

It's just the sunrise. Logan tells himself. He has to believe that. Everything else looked normal, after all.

What's worse is Logan doesn't know how long he's been hearing this sound or seeing the strange lights.

Patton knows about Logan's late night and early morning struggles.

But surprise, surprise, he pretends as if he's nonthewiser.

If either Virgil or Roman asks about Logan, Patton will answer: "Oh, that silly billy's probably got his head in one of his astronomy books again! I wouldn't bother him right now."

Knowing full well he's having an emotional breakdown in his room that gets worse every day.

Knowing about the little sneaks of alcohol in his hot morning beverage. Might even speak about yummy drink combinations when they hang out in the living room, while Logan is present, specifically and even only on the days Patton knows he's cheating with his bad habit, while he's still drinking it.

The further Logan is to the edge, the better. Patton is still bitter about the events of Redux ending in his favor, after all. He needs leverage from somewhere.

When Thomas left to see Nico, Logan heard the cord again. His chest tightened and though he could feel the tears welling up, he kept them down.

Thomas hasn't been very happy lately. He had to let him have this.

No matter how loud those cords get.

Janus

I noticed that Janus was either unseen by the others or unacknowledged by them.

Janus was near all of them but far enough that he was separated.

He could've just popped up at the end without them noticing but...that's less angsty therefore less fun so-

Janus has been the instigator for bringing Sides that have been hidden away to be brought to light for a long time. If the assumption that Janus let Remus out is true.

He's always been hinting at upcoming events that are sure to come if Thomas continues to ignore certain aspects of himself.

He knows. He knows our Orange boy is getting worse and soon will be too loud to ignore. Janus wants to protect Thomas but that's becoming harder every day. Thomas is making it harder.

Janus will reveal the Orange Side eventually. And very soon. Hell, that's looking like less and less of a choice considering Logan's...outburst.

I think Janus has this painful awareness that he can be seriously hated for doing his job. After all, he's always the one who's forced them to acknowledge uncomfortable truths about Thomas.

He's the one giving them all of those hard pills to swallow and especially after Remus, it is definitely overwhelming and exhausting to be met with.

They question their roles more and more because of how used they are to the fixed mindset Thomas has had for such a long time.

That can't feel good.

Janus knows that his job may cause more hatred to fester the more that's revealed.

Janus is being kept at arms length and he knows that won't stop any time soon.

But he's a clever snake. That won't keep him from keeping an eye on Patton.

(Find it real suspicious that Patton was all mushy with Janus in that end card but still is at a big distance from him.)

Loceit

Janus will sometimes find Logan in the common room with his head in his arms, sprawled out against the coffee table. His glasses being discarded from half his face, unmistakable tears lazily dripping out of his lifeless eyes.

Janus would wordlessly go to the sink and grab a glass, filling it with water.

Janus goes over to Logan, giving him a gentle rub on the back. He urges him to sit up. It takes Logan a few minutes but eventually does.

Janus hands Logan the water, supporting the back of his neck as struggles to get it down, reminding him to take his time.

Janus takes his glasses and gently sets them on the table. He hands Logan some tissues.

Logan lifelessly takes them and tries to clean his face. But he always ends up crying into them.

Janus moves Logan unkempt bangs from his face before moving his head to his shoulder. Janus manifests a warm blanket over Logan and uses a bit of his abilities to soothe the shorter man's pain, tenderly putting pressure on his neck.

Janus and Logan have a talk. Logan always asks why he bothers to stop and comfort him.

"You've helped me through a lot, Logan. Not returning the favor is out of the question."

That was always his answer.

Janus and Logan do this often.

Janus opens up about sometimes needing a bit of a drink himself from time to time. Though mostly that consists of tea more often than not, he sometimes has a glass of wine or two to relax on days when it's particularly hard.

He feels ashamed of it. Janus has to be the strongest out of everyone, especially the Dark Sides. Allowing things to faze him was the worst case scenario. At least, to that degree.

But Janus understands that isn't his fault and urges Logan not to blame himself, either. While he hated that weakness he occasionally submitted to, he wasn't going to let the rare slip up to define the worth of his role.

Logan thinks that Janus really is the strongest out of all of them just for saying things like that and he's being too hard on himself.

On nights when things become too much Janus will sit with Logan and share a drink. They try to have as many conversations without wine as possible but sometimes Janus says "screw it" and sits with Logan with one or two drinks.

Just having Janus there helps Logan choose his coffee in the mornings and feel as if he's being heard even a little bit.

Now if only those cords could actually quiet down, that'd be even better.

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thebigqueer · 4 years ago

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"The Demise of Nico's Rainbow Socks" - Solangelo - One-Shot

Summary: Nico and Will find themselves caught in the rain and can't have the picnic they wanted. This is inspired by the rainy day prompt for @solangeloweek !!

TW: There is some mention of food in here.

Read on AO3

Word Count: 1508

“Will, I absolutely do not think this is a good idea.”

“And why not? I already have everything ready.”

“Which is why you need to pack it all up. It’s literally about to rain.” As if to prove his point, Nico gestures harshly at the gray clouds that threaten the sanctity of the wide blue expanse above. A low thunder rumbles from the mass of gray, and a moist breeze throws both Nico’s and Will’s hair around.

The son of Apollo pouts and gestures to the picnic before him. “But I worked so hard on this. Do you really want all my efforts going to waste?”

Nico raises an eyebrow, and a small smile quivers against his mouth. He crosses his arms. “Did you, by any chance, make these sandwiches, Will?”

A bright grin flashes against Will’s lips. “I did. That’s why it’s a rare treat, since I never cook.”

Despite Nico’s hesitance with settling in, he drops to his knees and watches the food nervously.

“You see,” he says, “that is exactly why I should be afraid. You know how bad you are at cooking. And besides, the rain is going to soak all your hard work. Do you really want that?”

Will huffs and crosses his arms. “The least I could get is a thank you. It’s not like you could do any better.”

Nico laughs and grazes his finger against the sandwich in front of him. There isn’t much here - only two sandwiches, one for Nico and one for Will, and a pack of apple juice boxes. A wicker basket sits comfortably at the far corner of the red-and-white picnic blanket, but Nico doesn’t really know why it was necessary - they could really have just carried all this to the beach. Will’s a natural overachiever, though, which probably explains why he brought it with him.

“Instead of touching it, I think you should actually taste the sandwich,” Will suggests, nodding sarcastically. “Might be a better experience.”

Nico shakes his head. “I don’t really trust anything you make. The last time you tried to barbecue for the camp, almost everyone got sick.” Nico leans in, his eyes peering at Will’s with sincerity. “And I’m telling you, Will, it’s all going to soak through if we don’t leave right now. This thunderstorm doesn’t look merciful.” Then a new smile cracks against Nico’s face and he takes Will’s warm hands into his own, brushing his fingers against the blond’s palms. A softer look takes over Will’s eyes. “Besides, we can take this time to actually learn to cook. I could teach you things I know.”

For a moment, Will almost looks convinced. His eyebrows lower as he considers his options, and his fingers tangle with Nico’s. Then he shakes his head and sighs. “I don’t want to go inside, though,” he murmurs.

Nico frowns and tilts his head, confusion rippling over his face. A hesitant look overwhelms Will’s features and he looks away from his boyfriend, turning his eyes to the rippling blue water underneath.

“Hey,” Nico says, gently brushing his fingers against Will’s cheek. The latter turns his gaze back, but there’s something sadder in there, something desperate. “What’s wrong?”

The son of Apollo offers a gentle, sad chuckle. “It’s not a big deal, Nico. Don’t look so worried.”

“But you look sad.”

“It’s just…” Will sighs. “I don’t know. I feel like we haven’t had an actual moment to ourselves these days, you know? Hades has been on your case for the past few weeks about all these different things, and I guess I’ve been busy getting ready for college. I just miss you. I don’t want to go inside and be around my siblings.”

“Then we don’t have to go to your cabin,” Nico says. “We can shadow-travel back to mine so no one gets suspicious.”

“Yeah, but…” A small smile blooms across Will’s pink lips. “I like the rain. There’s something really intimate about it. And I want to be intimate with you.”

Nico gazes at Will. His blue eyes radiate a warm, loving energy, and his skin glows softly under the clouds. At the sight of his boyfriend’s golden glory, Nico’s heartbeat quickens.

Even in the overwhelming darkness, Will somehow still finds a way to shine.

Another rumble of thunder - this time louder and more insistent - rolls across the camp, and Nico and Will both jump. Silence envelops the two as they wait for the haunting moment to subside.

After a few agonizing moments, Nico lets loose a gentle laugh. “Then we can be alone in my cabin. We can just stand on my porch or something. I don’t want to get soaked like your sandwiches. You know how much I hate wet socks, and I am literally not wearing shoes right now.” As if to prove his point, Nico shifts his leg and showcases a rainbow sock. “Do you see this? I already have sand in it. Do you really think I want to get these fuzzy socks wet?”

A grimace slashes against WIll features. “Okay, yeah. That wouldn’t be fair to you. You’re already going through so much, as I can see.”

Nico nods morosely. “So much.” Then he smiles. “I’ll help you pack, though.”

But just as Nico’s fingers graze against his plate, another round of thunder rumbles throughout camp. Nico and Will snap their gazes back to each other, surprise and anxiety sparking in their eyes. They’re frozen in time, unable to move out of fear that just one act will bring the rains crashing down on them.

Lightning cracks against the darkness. Instead of doing the logical thing, like shoving the sandwiches into the wicker basket, Nico immediately moves his feet underneath himself to protect his socks. Will covers his head with his arms.

“Uh oh,” Nico murmurs.

A beat of silence passes. A gust of wind ruffles through their hair. Then the first drop falls, landing gracefully on Nico’s hand and trailing over his skin. After a few seconds, another bead of water comes down, this one bursting against the picnic blanket. One more catches up, then another, and soon the rain tumbles over the boys, blooming against the fabric of their clothing, breaking against their clear faces as the two of them tilt their heads up to watch the debris of the clouds fall.

Nico and Will look at each other in shock. Silence billows in the space between them, broken only by the loud torrent of rain. Next to them, the drops seep through the sandwiches, rendering them inedible.

Another sound breaks through the rain, and it takes a moment for Nico to realize it’s a laugh. Will’s laugh. A bright grin flashes against his golden features, and he gleams under the dark clouds. His light spills into the dock and saturates Nico’s skin, and a sense of warmth blooms under the latter’s skin. Nico bites his lip as he watches the pure childlike wonder that illuminates Will’s face.

It’s not often that he’s like this. Nico wants to savor this moment.

“It’s raining!” Will exclaims, almost like he can’t believe it. His blue eyes burst with color in the darkness. “This is so cool.”

Nico opens his mouth to speak, but under the loud cracks of thunder and lightning, his voice barely weaves through the raindrops. He huffs and pulls himself closer to Will, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend’s shoulders and leaning his head against his neck.

“Great,” he mutters. “Now we’re wet.”

“How are your socks?”

“Dead. I hate this.”

“We can go inside, if you want. But I’m not sure it’ll do much.”

“No.” Nico tilts his head to face Will, and a smile of his own glimmers against his face. Nico’s dark eyes lock with Will’s blue ones, and they face each other, basking in the intimacy of the torrents. “No, you were right. There is something nice about the rain.”

It’s freeing. It’s liberating. It makes Nico feel like he’s washing away all his sins and mistakes, like he’s starting anew. And in Will’s embrace, he’s finding a new version of himself.

“Yeah?” Will whispers. His own arms wrap around his boyfriend’s waist and he leans his forehead against Nico’s, lending some of his warmth. “I thought so, too.”

Nico presses his fingers against Will’s cheeks and kisses him, stealing some more of his loving energy and comforting heat. They move to the sound of the rain, to the ripple of the water, to the cracking of branches and the rumble of thunder. They move with the nature around them, with the storms above them, with the air through them. They become one with the world encompassing them.

When they break apart, Nico smiles. “Now we need to figure out a way to get through the sand without making my socks more uncomfortable than they already are.”

Will chuckles and presses his head against Nico’s. “I’m sorry about your socks, but I love you.”

Nico tightens his fingers against Will’s sweatshirt, yearning for his warmth. “I love you, too.”

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bothcreativitybois · 4 years ago

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Karaoke

Pairings: Intruality, pintroverts

TWs: Alcohol, the word sex, slightly angsty ending, non sexual ‘Daddy’.

Songs: I’m Not That Girl (Wicked) I Don’t Dance (High School Musical 2)

Taglist (ask to be added): @star-crossed-shipper @crazydemigod666

Karaoke night. The night once a month that half the sides love and the other half dread. For Janus, Logan and Virgil the night was torture. Drinking, performing, making an idiot of himself. However the more boisterous sides thrived on these nights. Remus usually took the helm, Roman saw it as a ‘waste of good talent’. However he was never alone.

“Get another umbrella drink!” Patton cheered. When Thomas was drunk so were the sides, so both of the sides had pink flushed cheeks and trouble controlling their volume. Patton didn’t really need to be there but he enjoyed the night and always stuck around.

“That isn’t their name, Daddy.” Remus teased. He knew what Patton was talking about, the drink they’d been having all night and Patton had quite enjoyed it. However he did not enjoy the name. Patton looked down at his crossed legs.

“But it has a bad word…” He whimpered. Remus found Patton’s hesitation adorable although he did also enjoy pushing him. But even drunk Patton wouldn’t say a bad word, especially when the whole name made it more vulgar.

“Another sex on the beach then!” Remus shouted. That drink was perfect for the two of them. Patton enjoyed the pretty colour and sweet taste, Remus enjoyed the name and how drunk it made Thomas. The liquid courage fuelled him. Remus guided Thomas to the bar and he ordered another drink. They looked at the stage where a member of Thomas’ group was singing I’m Not That Girl. Patton bopped along cutely, Remus was mesmerised with his adorable little bounces. Patton noticed Remus staring and giggled.

“What?” Patton pushed Remus away playfully.

“Watching you dance like that makes me happy.” Remus usually didn’t have much of a filter. The only thing he’d block was his emotions, especially ones he saw as weak, like the growing admiration he’d been having for Patton, but when drunk those final hurdles shifted down too. Patton covered his face but Remus could still see the wide smile under his hands. Something about Remus being so genuine made Patton melt. When Thomas turned to get his drink he noticed a new group enter the bar, specifically one member. A familiar cute nerd with dark hair and stubble. Patton hit Remus’ arm and pointed to where Thomas was looking.

“Code Flores!” Patton squeaked. Remus’ smirked. Roman wasn’t around, now Thomas might take his suggestions for seduc- flirting with Nico. Especially since he’s drunk.

“Oh hell yes! The night just got interesting.” Remus enthused. Patton enjoyed seeing Remus so excited but was stuck on what Roman would think. Thomas waved at Nico, he smiled and began walking over. Thomas picked up his drink and Remus summoned identical ones for him and Patton.

“What are you gonna say?” Patton asked looking up cutely at Remus, his heart skipped a beat. All the things he wanted to say to Nico… he couldn’t say in front of Patton. Hell, Patton wouldn’t even say the word sex when it was in a drink name. Remus looked up at Nico then back down to Patton.

Maybe… just maybe…

Remus thought of all the things he wanted to say to Patton.

“Hi there!” Nico gave a little wave as he spoke.

“Didn’t expect to see an angel in here tonight.” Thomas responded. Nico blushed and laughed.

“How many drinks have you had?” Nico asked playfully. “You seem a lot different to the guy who fell in a trash can.”

“Well I’ll need something else to fall into tonight, how strong are your arms?” Thomas reached out and gave Nico’s arm a cheeky squeeze. Patton chuckled.

“I love watching you work, Remus.” Patton encouraged. “Roman would never be that forward.” Remus took a moment.

“...You enjoy me being forward?” Remus asked, confused. This whole time he was holding this stuff back in fear it’d be too much for him, but Patton was not only receptive but enjoying it.

“Sometimes.” Patton diverted his eyes. “It gets the job done.” Remus knew Patton enjoyed things more storybook romance, he knew how to provide that.

“Are you gonna sing tonight?” Thomas asked Nico. The man rubbed his neck shyly.

“I’m not sure I could do something like that…” He admitted. “Being up there alone... everyone looking at me…”

“Yeah that’s the fun part!” Thomas joked. “And who said you’d be alone?” Nico blushed. Patton caught on to Remus’ plan.

“Are you suggesting a duet?” Nico raised an eyebrow. Thomas put down his drink and put out a hand.

“If you would be so kind?” Thomas joked. Nico slipped his hand onto Thomas’, both men smiled and blushed. Thomas began to drag Nico to the stage. Patton’s eyes sparkled.

“Remus you’re great at this!” Patton marvelled. Remus smiled at him.

“Now it’s your turn.” Remus elbowed Patton flirtily. “What song should they do?” Patton’s face lit up. He looked closely as Thomas flipped through the folder of songs available.

“That one!” Patton pointed to one of the songs written under the heading ‘Duets’. Patton somehow smiled in a way that was devilish and sweet, it made Remus’ heart flutter. Thomas jammed a finger onto the binder.

“You up for this?” Thomas looked back at Nico and asked, he was met with a smile and nod. Thomas handed the book to the DJ and took two microphones from them. He and Nico’s hands brushed as he handed over the microphone. Thomas took the opportunity to drag him onto the stage. Remus and Patton sat back as the first notes of I Don’t Dance flew from the speakers. Thomas and Nico’s voices bounced off each other perfectly. The boys danced together, which gave Patton an idea. He grabbed Remus’ hand just before the instrumental solo.

“Do the thing!” Patton demanded. Remus looked at him confused, head fuzzy from the alcohol and the feeling of Patton’s hand slipped on top of his.

“Do what?” Remus asked. Patton rolled his eyes and pulled Remus to his feet. He began dancing to the beat, body close to Remus’. Thomas mimicked his movements with Nico. Remus began to understand what Patton meant. Remus took control, Thomas mirrored. Remus slipped his hands onto Patton’s hips, he guided him to loosen them to the beat of the music. Patton’s whole body tingled from the touch.

“Relax. It’ll help you.” Thomas whispered in tandem with Remus. Thomas and Nico separated to continue singing, but Remus and Patton didn’t. Their movements slowed, they blocked out anything that wasn’t each other. Patton had moved his hands to Remus’ shoulders. As Nico and Thomas belted the last notes, Remus rested his forehead on Patton’s. The soft side bit his lip.

“Is that what you meant?” Remus purred quietly. Words got caught behind the lump in Patton’s throat and instead he nodded. “We should get back to Thomas…” Remus trailed. He began to remove his hands from Patton’s hips but was stopped with arms draped around his neck. Both the sides felt warm and drawn closer.

“He can handle himself.” Patton whispered. Remus took the hint, it was the green light he’d been waiting for. He pulled Patton closer so their bodies were touching. Patton was surprised with how gentle Remus was being, as much as he enjoyed the rough chaotic Remus, this was bringing up something else. “Please kiss me.” Patton finally gave in. Hearing that, seeing how close Patton was, Remus couldn’t hold back. He lifted Patton up to him and kissed him deeply, Patton kicked up one leg behind him. They stayed there until neither could breathe then pulled away. Only then did they realise what they’d done. Surprisingly Remus was the one who pushed off first. He stared at Patton in a way he couldn’t read.

“Patton- I shouldn’t-” Remus couldn’t complete his thoughts. Patton reached out a hand, but Remus just sunk out.

Patton and Remus really like karaoke night.

But they know the others don’t.

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seattlesea · 4 years ago

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The Poor Character Developments in the Heroes of Olympus Series

Rick Riordan doesn’t know how to write character arcs ✨

-Percy. What arc did he even have? From The Last Olympian to The Son of Neptune it seems like he just got more arrogant and douchey, and this is never explained or expanded on. The readers don’t know why he suddenly got so arrogant. His pride got out of control and he was doing things he knew he couldn’t do but jumped into anyway like attacking a giant head-on alone. He was reckless in PJO, but every time he always had a plan. In HoO he just turned careless. He even put other demigods’ lives at risk at times and honestly didn’t do much throughout the series. He was just kind of there, not really contributing to anything and only involved when the book needed comedic relief or to remind the readers that ‘Hey, Percy is super cool and powerful’. As for his arc, he didn’t change at all. He just got annoying and way too self-involved and vain. I mean- he was literally in front of Hercules, the man who broke Zoë Nightshade’s heart- the girl who literally sacrificed herself for Percy- and he didn’t even say or do anything? He didn’t even mention Zoë or think about her at all. All he was worried about was how ‘big-shot Jason’ got to meet the all-famous Hercules and he didn’t. And this never changed. Percy’s character arc was completely flat cause he never learned from his lessons or mistakes. Even when in Tartarus and was reminded of all the people that he lost during the Second Titan War, how he forgot about Calypso on her island for over two years, and how he left Bob the Titan alone in the Underworld, he didn’t make any move to change. After that scene, he completely forgot to even mention them again.

-Annabeth. Same thing with Annabeth, except her realism was ripped from her. She was well-written in PJO with actual flaws and weaknesses, relationships outside of her romantic one with Percy, a very important and crucial role, fighting bravely, etc., but in HoO, she- just like Percy- was pretty much dead weight, and she became extremely weak. The only thing she really accomplished was following the Mark of Athena and getting the Athena Parthenos, but she still had to be saved by everyone else, and honestly any other demigod could’ve done it way faster. Nico literally could’ve just shadow-travelled to the statue then shadow-travelled it back out. The only times she fought (which was very few times) she was always with another demigod, and the two-three times she actually fought she always had to be saved, by a newbie, especially. In the Temple of Fear, Piper ‘toughened’ her up and saved her three times from the giant Mimas, and when caught by the giants, Piper was the one to save Annabeth (again). She couldn’t do anything by herself without others having to save or help her. And she also became very dull. She didn’t have any more of her pride, short temper, care, ferocity, etc. All she was was a Percy fangirl. Everything was about him and him only. This also didn’t change. We didn’t see any improvement or alterations to her personality whatsoever.

-Jason. The majority of the fandom doesn’t like Jason- which is understandable- but they hate on him for the wrong reasons. They dislike him cause he was ‘boring’ despite him actually having multiple distinct personality traits. They just think he didn’t have any personality cause his traits weren’t directly commented on like the other characters’ were (which is actually bad writing, readers should be able to interpret a character’s personality without it being stated to them by other characters). And he even had a sense of humor. His character arc though...fell short. But! He could’ve had an amazing character arc, Riordan just focused on the wrong parts. Riordan’s take on Jason’s character arc was deciding if he was more ‘Greek or Roman’ and then deciding he was both. But...that makes no sense, cause that’s just stereotyping every single Greek and every single Roman. The fandom says that the Romans are the cruel, harsh, and merciless ones, but what about Hazel? Or Frank? Or Reyna? Or the fact that they immediately accepted Nico while Camp Half-Blood outcasted and even ostracized him? And they say that the Greeks are the fun, cool, relaxed ones, but what about Percy, the only character to canonically torture? Or Annabeth, the unfriendly bossy one? Or Thalia, the merciless, ambitious hunter? Or Piper, the prejudiced manipulator? So really, Jason’s character arc made no sense. It was written to be Jason going from ‘always following the rules and following expectations because of his godly parent’ to ‘doing whatever he wants’, but the fandom forgets that Camp Jupiter is the one who doesn’t care about godly parent, Camp Half-Blood does, cause Camp Jupiter has demigods live in barracks for the sole purpose of demigods without family members not having to live alone while Camp Half-Blood separates cabins and tables by parentage and immediately set Percy to high standards after he was claimed. Besides, does Camp Jupiter have harpies that literally kill demigods if they’re out past curfew? Plus, Jason was breaking multiple rules before his character arc anyways- leaving Camp Jupiter, sailing across the Mediterranean Sea, etc.

-Piper. Oh boy. Where to start with this one. I’ve already gone over how her horribly-portrayed backstory ruined the chances of a good character arc, but now let’s discuss the character arc she actually had. And the best way to describe it is ‘tell not show’. The main idea for Piper’s character arc was that she felt insecure about herself and useless and that she gained confidence in herself and her powers, but that’s not actually what happened, because starting from The Lost Hero, Piper showed multiple narcissistic tendencies that showed that she had a huge ego and placed herself on a pedestal she did nothing to earn or deserve. This is first shown with femininity- Piper immediately thinks that she’s better and above any girl if they so much as wear lip gloss or a dress, which is a sign of an obvious ego: thinking you’re better than everyone else (or in her case, a certain group of people) before getting to know them first. It’s also shown when her and Annabeth are looking for a weapon for Piper and when suggested that she doesn’t choose a dagger cause she’s a newbie, Piper retaliates with “But you use a dagger��...aka thinking she’s already on Annabeth’s level and that she can do whatever Annabeth can despite being a newbie. It’s not hypocrisy if Annabeth has been training for over nine years. Another example would be in The Mark of Athena- "Piper's eyes flashed defiantly, like anything Reyna could do, she could do". Like, no, she can’t, cause Reyna has been training her whole life and Piper doesn’t even know her. Piper shows multiple signs of having a very high opinion of herself, including degrading others (especially other women) for her own sake, thinking she can do what anyone else can, thinking she’s better than everyone else, constantly fussing over her appearance, thinking she deserves everything she’s gotten and that she deserves more without earning it, etc., so her entire character arc wasn’t even there. She just went from quiet about her narcissism to openly expressing it. She never grew from her horrible traits and habits, never realized she was wrong by jumping all over Jason while he was amnesiac, etc., and the whole ‘feeling of uselessness’ was brought up once then never expanded on or mentioned ever again, and nor was her internalized misogyny and fiery hatred towards femininity (which wasn’t even explained). Riordan should’ve used the ‘snobby rich girl learns to be kinder and more modest’ or expanded on the fact that Piper almost killed her friends multiple times. In Katoptris, she saw Jason with gold eyes in Kansas then said ‘Let’s go to Kansas!’ She saw her, Jason, and Percy literally drowning and legit said ‘Let’s go drown!’ without telling them about what she actually saw in her dagger. She saw her and Annabeth exploring some ruins and said ‘Let’s go!’ despite knowing the visions were deadly. She put all of her friends in multiple, life-threatening situations and never felt guilty and wasn’t even called out on it, because no one said if the visions in Katoptris were fate- something you can’t avoid- or destiny- something you can choose and change.

-Frank. Frank’s character arc was clear, but it happened in the wrong way. The main idea of his development was that he was insecure about his appearance then gained confidence from it, but he did only after he magically gained rippling abs and muscle. He only felt good about himself once he lost all his fat as if that’s not obvious lookism, fatphobia, and fat shaming (thanks, Riordan). Frank should’ve learned to love himself despite his flab and appearance and learned that it didn’t matter what he looked like cause he would still be a hero either way. He should’ve shown the readers that ‘Hey, I don’t care what I look like, cause appearance doesn’t matter, whether you choose to do the right thing or not does’, but it was wasted for fat shaming every single reader who was insecure about their weight and didn’t or couldn’t get skinnier and telling them that they should be insecure about themselves because they don’t look like Frank. Is it really so hard for society to believe that a lot of people who aren’t stick-thin are happy and confident about their body?

-Hazel. Honestly, her character arc was one of the most confusing ones, cause she didn’t have anything to drive or even start one. Her backstory is tragic, yes, but there isn’t anything in it that she has to learn to change from cause all of that was resolved when she took down Alcyoneus and Gaea. The only thing I can think of is learning to break away from toxic people even if they’re your family or friend or cause you don’t want to hurt their feelings, but Hazel didn’t struggle with relationships at all. She wasn’t even introduced to any toxic people besides Octavian, and she already hated him. Her transition from the racist and segregated days to the modern world could’ve been really good material for a character arc along with internalized racism- she of all people (someone born and raised in segregation who was taught to hate herself and her skin tone) would grow up thinking that there was something wrong with her because of her dark skin tone and- especially after meeting so many different people of different ethnic groups and skin colors- could’ve learned to love herself and learn that skin tone doesn’t define you (which also would’ve been a perfect lesson for younger readers). Another thing that puzzled me about her ‘development’ was her powers. Her Mist control powers are cool, but what would’ve been cooler was if she was reluctant to use them because she wouldn’t want to twist the minds of people just like Gaea did to her mom. Her gem and metal control powers could’ve been expanded on but they were barely mentioned after The Son of Neptune. As for her curse, that...made absolutely no sense. Her curse was honestly just dead weight. It wasn’t even that one thing that had a lot of potential, it didn’t even have potential, cause what would she ever use it for? It was just used to make her backstory sadder, but it was never mentioned again or even explained. The only thing it could’ve been used for (and what I was hoping would happen) was if one her friends or allies took one of her cursed jewels and died because of it. The one thing I was really hoping to see in her character arc was from the quote she said to Hecate after Hecate gave her the three paths to choose from- “I’m not choosing one of your paths. I’m making my own.” This really sparked my interest because almost everything Hazel had gone through was forced onto her by others without her consent. She didn’t choose to be born into racism and segregation. She didn’t choose to be cursed. She didn’t choose to be used as a pawn by Gaea through her mother. She didn’t choose to almost raise a giant and nearly bring upon the apocalypse. She didn’t choose to use her curse against others and move to multiple places. She didn’t choose to be brought back to life. She didn’t choose to be brought to Camp Jupiter and thrown into an army. She didn’t choose to be a part of the Seven and face the same woman who used her and had her mother possessed years ago. The only two choices she made herself- destroying the island and Alcyoneus and sacrificing Elysium so her mother wouldn’t go to the Fields of Punishment- and she and her mother died because of it and she went to Asphodel for years. I was really hoping to see Hazel break free from others always making decisions for her and learn to make her own choices, but that never happened.

-Leo: His character arc was also very confusing, but because it was all over the place. Riordan kept switching up Leo’s internal problems; forgetting about one of them and jumping to another, jumping to three different others, and then going back to the first one a few chapters later. It was so confusing. And then- in the end- he focused on the worst problem Leo had- not finding a love interest. I mean, who exactly focuses on whether or not they have a girlfriend while in the middle of a war and fighting to survive again? I liked Leo’s other problems- guilt over and blaming himself for his mother’s death, seeing his fire powers as a curse instead of a gift, forcing himself to hide his pain with humor instead of opening up to people, running away from all his problems, and his abandonment issues and constant fear of being left out and alone, but they were all replaced with ‘He felt like the seventh wheel’ (cause yes, Riordan, if you don’t have a love interest, you are immediately lesser than anyone who does, obviously). Leo got over his mother’s death in The Lost Hero- which, great- but after that nothing too memorable changed about his character. He never even used or mentioned his fire powers after The Lost Hero, he continued to hide all his pain with humor, hide his emotions from other people, and never learned to open up to others about his pain and trauma, he never learned to stop running away from his powers (shown by when he faked his own death without bothering to talk to the others about feeling left out), and his abandonment issues and fears were never expanded on, he just ran into the arms of a girl who verbally abused and constantly insulted him AKA ran to the person who gave him attention, even if it was the bad kind of attention, as if that’s not something emotionally scarred people and people with abandonment issues do, and he never grew from accepting unfair hate and criticism.

-Nico. His character development was actually pretty good. From going to an energetic, cheerful, and playful kid to becoming a quiet, closed-off, and independent teen who struggled with depression and feeling alone and like he didn’t belong, to finding comfort in his family and friends (especially Reyna, Hazel, and Will) and learning to accept himself for who he was (as a son of Hades and as gay) and how to confide in others about his struggles, problems, and trauma and finally letting people in after being do dubious of people after Percy broke his promise to protect Bianca, he found out that King Minos was using him, and almost all of Camp Half-Blood excluded and ignored him. After being alone for most of his life, by the end of The Blood of Olympus, he has two homes (as stated by Reyna), is comfortable with people hugging him, allowed people to take care of and help him, decided to stay at Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter instead of isolating himself, made a bunch of new friends that helped him through his struggles, and he even showed multiple signs of healing from his depression and anxiety. His character development was pretty well-written. But, there was one thing wrong with it that kind of ruined the rest- his love life. Nico had an incredible character arc that could’ve taught multiple valuable lessons to younger readers, but most of it was ditched after he came out as gay in The House of Hades. Throughout all of his point of views in The Blood of Olympus, Nico never thought about any of his past trauma or struggles, Bianca, his new family and friends, etc. Pretty much all he thought about was finding out how to come out to the others and Percy. And while mustering the courage to come out is a huge deal and is great material for a character arc, Riordan never actually utilized it. Nico telling Reyna he was gay was really touching (best duo) and telling Percy he had a crush on him was great, but after that, his entire character was about his attraction towards Will (which was way too rushed, but that’s for another rant), and it got pretty annoying cause it made it obvious that Riordan only confirmed him gay for publicity by trying to shove it in the reader’s faces as if every gay person needs to have a boyfriend to validate and prove their sexuality. Riordan should’ve stayed on track with Nico’s original character arc.

-Reyna. THE BEST CHARACTER ARC. Hers was actually really good. She started off trying to do everything on her own because she believed that she had to be strong enough to do things by herself without help from others to learning that it’s okay to ask for help. She also started off with the (quite serious and traumatizing) problem of bottling all her emotions because she believed that she always had to put on a strong, brave face for others without showing any signs of weakness to learning that it’s okay to express your emotions and confide in others (and again, that it’s okay to ask for help). This was mostly evident after she met Nico, which (in my opinion) kick-started her motivation to change because once she saw how much Nico needed help and giving him that support and comfort, realized that everyone is allowed to ask for help and started confiding in Nico as well. I like how she stayed strict and serious cause she has a formal job- a job that’s equivalent to an American’s president, that is- so she’s supposed to be serious, and she’s only strict cause she wants to protect her people. Though I do hate when people misjudge her as ‘cold-hearted’ or ‘cruel’ because Reyna is actually one of the kindest and most selfless characters in the series. Even Pegasus (the immortal lord of the pegasi) was ‘touched’ by Reyna’s ‘compassion’ towards Scipio (he didn’t even say that to Percy about Blackjack), and it’s pretty obvious she cares deeply about her family, friends, and people. And overall, her character arc was easily the best-written one in HoO. But then Riordan- just like he does with most things in this series- completely trashed her character arc just so he could have the opportunity to make fun of wlw readers who thought Reyna and Thalia would be a good couple by making her leave everything behind for the Hunters of Artemis just cause she ‘couldn’t find a love interest’ as if joining the Hunters is the only option for single female demigods instead of just...living a normal demigod life without a partner without leaving everything they know and love behind for no reason other than their shitty love life.

#heroes of olympus #percy jackson #character arc #character development #rick riordan #annabeth chase #jason grace #frank zhang #hazel levesque #leo valdez #reyna ramirez arellano #reyna avila ramirez arellano #nico di angelo #piper mclean

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whispering-raine · 4 years ago

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Heartbreak - A Sanders Sides oneshot

((TWS: HEART BREAK (yes that means that Patton is affected), PANIC ATTACK, BEING SICK, BLOOD, FEVER, PUKE, MENTIONS OF AN ARGUMENT, DESCRIPTIVE GORE/WOUNDS, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, BLOODY ARTWORK AT THE END

3rd person POV:

Roman awoke, his eyes fluttering open as he examined his surroundings. He had fallen asleep in Pattons room the night before, so this was different from the normal scenery that covered the room he would usually wake up in. Family photos of the sides displayed in picture frames, kids toys lying everywhere but his desk, which was covered in random pieces of paper and probably a few recipes for cookies and other treats. Pattons room had become Romans safe space, and vise versa.

"Good morning, my dear~" Roman whispered, giving Patton a small kiss on his forehead. Patton gave a happy hum in his sleep, a soft smile following.

But something was off. His forehead was just a bit warmer than usual. His cheeks were tinted just a bit more pink than he was used to seeing. Roman sent a sympathetic look over towards the sleeping boy, walking out of the room.

He walked towards the bathroom down the hall, teaching into the medicine cabinet and grabbing a thermometer. He walked back, Patton still sleeping and hugging a stuffed animal.

Sweat was beaded on his face, which still held a tired smile, disregarding the shape he was in. Roman was careful to be quiet, holding the speaker of the thermometer to muffle the noise as he swiped the metal across Pattons forehead quickly. 102.1*

He muttered a quick "Shit." before taking the thermometer back to the bathroom. He quickly washed it off with warm water, putting the cap back on and placing it in the medicine cabinet.

He rushed out to the kitchen, in which he saw Logan typing away on his phone and almost chugging his daily cup of black coffee.

"Logan." Roman addressed the logical side. Logan almost immediately noticed the uneasy look on Romans face.

"Ah, good morning Roman. Is something the matter?" Logan questioned, putting his almost empty cup to the side and turning off his phone, setting it down on the table quietly.

"Yeah, yeah something is the matter. Can individual sides get sick?" His breathing was starting to get out of pattern.

"Well, yes, I suppose so. Are you feeling unwell?" Logan said in a concerned tone, walking over to Roman and reaching up to place a hand on his forehead. Roman politely moved Logans hand away with his own.

"No, actually, Patton has a fever and I was making sure that this was normal."

"Patton?" Logan questioned curiously. Roman nodded, confirming what Logan had once been so curious about. Logan seemed to think for a second, adjusting his glasses quickly and standing up straighter, although gay.

"Well Nico and Thomas got into a bit of an argument last night, so that may be the cause of it. But I'll do some more research in a little while to do a better and more proper diagnosis." Logan said, sitting back down and taking another sip of his coffee.

"Thanks, Nerd." Roman said before leaving, going back to Pattons room. He was going to make Patton feel better no matter the cost. He walked back into his room, the door creaking the slightest. Roman sighed, a sad smile curling on his lips. He layed down next to his beloved, wrapping arms around him and giving him the softest hug he could manage.

"Mm," Patton hummed, slowly waking up.

"Hello darling.." Roman whispered, rubbing the smaller ones back lightly.

"Are you feeling alright? You have a fever.." Roman asked as he awaited patiently for a response.

Patton could only manage a small shake of his head, leaning farther into Romans touch. "I-Is...everyone else okay though..?" Patton slurred, his words muffled by Romans shirt.

"I'm pretty sure. I haven't checked on everyone, but Logan and I feel okay." Patton responded with a nod, almost falling back asleep in Romans arms.

But he was awoken by the voice again, "Would you like me to make you some tea...?" Patton thought for a moment, before giving a small nod.

"But I can make it myself. I don't want you to waste too much time on me." He insisted, tiredly rolling off of Roman to sit up. He leaned back on his palms, repressing a yawn. Roman sat up with him, putting an arm around his shoulders and rubbing his upper arm.

"You're in no condition to be doing that yourself. I can get it for you, I promise." Patton slid his hand over Romans, intertwining their fingers silently.

"I'll be fine."

"No you won't." Patton let out a chuckle, smiling up at Roman.

"Ro, I'm fine. I'll get right back into bed after I get my tea."

"Fine. Then let me see you stand on your own."

Patton grabbed his glasses off of the nightstand, slipping them on. Roman helped Patton to a standing position, holding him as if he were a kid learning how to ride a bike. Roman finally let go, although only inches apart from the swaying boy. Pattons knees immediately buckled, falling into Romans chest with barely any control of his own body.

"See? I'm fine!" Patton joked, lifting only his head from Romans chest. Roman couldn't help but smile at the smaller boy.

"And this is why I'm making your tea for you."

Patton let out a whine, burying his face back into Romans shirt. The both wrapped their arms around each other, Pattons hung down at Romans waist; and Romans wrapped around his shoulders.

"Come on, let me get you back into bed."

Patton gave in at this point, allowing Roman to pick him up and gracefully lay him back down onto the soft covers.

"I'll be right back."

Patton layed on his bed, trying to stop the world from spinning around him as he focussed on a stain on the ceiling. A few extra minutes of sleep wouldn't hurt, would it? Patton let his heavy eyelids shut as he curled into a ball, trying to get comfortable. He was almost immediately woken up by Roman walking in, holding a glass of tea. The glass had a cat paw pattern on it. It was always Pattons favorite.

"Hello my darling~" Romans voice rang throughout the room once again, placing the cup of tea on the bedside table.

"Hi, honey.." Patton mumbled, rolling over to face Roman. Roman smiled softly, laying down next to Patton.

"Cuddles?" Patton asked, holding his arms out and doing grabby hands. Roman couldn't help but blush at this, sweeping him into his arms and holding him. Patton giggled quietly, smiling and blushing.

"Do you know anything about what happened last night?" Roman spoke up.

"No, is everything okay?" Patton immediately grew concerned.

"Well Thomas and Nico got into a bit of an..argument...late last night." Realization struck Patton like a brick. He finally realized why he felt so horrible. Heartbreak. Then why hadn't the cracks shown up yet?

"Do you have a mirror I can borrow?" Patton asked, sitting up and rolling off of Roman.

"What?" Roman was beyond confused.

"It's complicated! I just need a mirror and quick!" Patton began to shake, worrying about almost everything at the exact moment. This has only happened one other time, and Patton was lucky to survive it. But that was years ago. Patton didn't know if he'd make it through this one. Heartbreak. Such a literal term in the sense of sides.

"I think there's a handheld one on my desk, but that's all the was across the hall. You'd be better off just going to the bathroom." Patton nodded, slowly getting up.

"Are you sure you're okay to walk? I don't want you getting hurt. I can go with you if-"

"I'm fine," He reassured, stumbling quickly out of the room. That left behind a very worried and confused Roman.

Patton ran to the bathroom, holding the wall as he did so. He slammed the door shut, making sure to lock it as he leaned on the marble counter. He brushed his bangs out of his face with his hand, seeing the smallest crack, starting at his hairline and going down onto his forehead.

"Shoot.."

Patton knew that when something like this happened, Virgil was always affected. Whether Thomas is anxious that Nico doesn't love him as much as he used to, or he's scared that they're going to break up, Virgil is going to be affected to some degree. Patton made sure to put his bangs back in place, going out of the bathroom and towards Virgils room.

He creeked open the door, not trying to scare his dark strange son. Virgils head shot up as soon as he heard the quiet noise. He took off his headphones in a rush as he paused his music.

"Hey Kiddo, can I come in..?" Patton asked gently, peeking his head in. Virgil could only nod and hum, not trusting his voice. Patton walked in, closing the door behind him.

"Hey, Pat." Virgil mumbled, his voice slightly distorted. The father figure was leaning on the door frame, keeping his balance. Patton gave a small wave, walking over to his bed and trying not to collapse on the way.

"Dad, are you alright? Last night Thomas-" Virgil said quickly, before Patton cut him off. Patton stayed silent, but moved his hand up to shove his bangs back and show the small crack - soon to grow bigger - to Virgil. Virgil let out a gasp, he swore his heart stopped for a second.

"I-It can't be happening again...! No! I-I won't let it happen!" Virgil had started crying. Patton let out a choked cough, before wiping Virgils tears away with the other hand. The only thing that could be heard was Virgils rapid breathing, until Patton spoke once again.

"I'm going to be okay Kiddo. Relax. Take a breather." He said as he held Virgils face. His own dizziness almost made him fall over as he scooted towards the scared and anxious boy. Virgil nodded, trying to get his breath back to normal. Patton put an arm around Virgil, rubbing his back in the slightest.

"Here Virge, copy my breathing." Patton took a deep, exaggerated breath, trying not to cough. Patton whispered small reassurances, such as "It's going to be okay." or "Breathe,".

They seemed to be working as Virgil slowly calmed down. Once Virgil could finally breathe again, he layed his head into Pattons shoulder, in which Patton brought up a hand to stroke his hair quietly.

"What if something bad happens to you?" Virgil mumbled, playing with his hoodie sleeves.

"Then we'll cross that bridge when we get to it, Kiddo." Patton said in a tone that was at least one octave down from his normal, cheery one.

It was too serious. And it scared Virgil.

"But Dad..." His voice began to distort again, "...I don't think I can live without you..." This brought on a whole new wave of tears for Virgil.

"Oh Kiddo... C'mere.. It's going to be okay.." Patton said as he wrapped his arms around Virgil as tight as he could without hurting him. Virgil gripped onto one of those arms as if Patton would disappear if he didn't. Patton could feel the crack expanding down towards his eyebrow, something he'd have to cover up later with makeup. But he decided to ignore it for now. Although a tear escaped his eye, he still managed to keep a calm smile on his face.

Meanwhile, Roman was talking with Logan in the kitchen once again.

"I guess I'm just...worried? The last time Patton was sick like this was..." Roman said, trying to remember when the time he was referencing was. Then it hit him, "Thomas' last breakup." It was almost under his shaking breath.

"What're you guys talking about?~" Remus sang, walking in with Janus.

"Oh! Janus! Just the guy I needed to see!" Logan exclaimed, ignoring Remus completely.

"Hm?" Janus cocked an eyebrow, confused but still paying careful attention.

"You were there at Thomas' and Nicos fight, correct?"

But Patton overheard everything. Of course it was Janus who would've been in the fight. He probably caused it in the first place. Another piece of his forehead cracked, leaving a terrible sight. He actually trusted Janus for once. And he was mad at himself for it.

A few minutes passed of overthinking and hugging Virgil. Patton, lost in his thought, barely even heard the small curse that came out of Virgils mouth.

"Shit, Pat, you're bleeding." Virgil muttered, his tears now dry, but the stains still on his cheeks. The hug had ended, apparently.

"Hm?" Patton was still busy thinking, only looking at Virgil in his peripheral view.

"Patton for Gods sake pay attention to me! You! Are! Bleeding!" Virgil raised his voice, done with Pattons bullshittery for today, even though it was only the morning.

"Wait what? Where?"

Virgil reached up towards Pattons forehead, wiping a dribble of the red, sticky liquid off of his warm skin. Virgil was shocked, gasping in the slightest. He put his other, uncontaminated hand on the other side of his forehead, making sure not to hit any of the cracks.

"You're burning up." Virgil whispered to himself, placing a soft hand on Pattons cheek.

"Oh, I would've never guessed!" Patton joked, giggling a bit.

"Have you taken your temperature at all??"

"Roman mentioned something about a fever when I woke up, but I'm not sure if he took it." Virgil thought for a moment, Pattons words finally registering in his head.

"You...slept with Roman...?" Virgil recoiled, making a disgusted face at Patton.

"Not the point, but yeah, I slept with him." Virgil shook his head, trying to get those thoughts out of his head.

"Just...lye down, I'm grabbing the thermometer." Virgil said as get got up.

"But this is your bed?" Patton wasn't upset by this, no, but he didn't want to intrude. Especially considering the fact that Virgil normally didn't like the other sides touching his stuff in the first place.

"And? You're laying down. You're swaying just sitting there. Did you think I couldn't see it?" Virgil growled, putting a firm hand on Pattons shoulder.

"No." His voice was fragile and weak. Virgil could feel his anxiety heighten at this. He's never seen Patton just this vulnerable before. He gave a slight force to Pattons shoulder, pushing him out of the sitting position he was in, and back onto the pillow. He had barely pushed. Just a mere pressure, almost less than gravity gave.

Patton let his legs stretch out naturally, not bothering to stop it from happening. Virgil gave a slight sympathetic chuckle, pulling a thin blanket over him from the end of his own bed.

"I'll be right back, 'kay Dad?"

"M'kay.." Patton mumbled, curling onto himself and gripping the blanket. Virgil gave one more glance towards the curled up figure on his dark bed before leaving the room.

He came almost face to face with a fuming Prince as soon as he stepped into the hallway.

"Well hello to you too, Princey." Virgil remarked sarcastically. Roman just grumbled.

"If that snake wouldn't have been the only side awake during the argument, this wouldn't have happened." Roman just now looked up at Virgil, his eyes brimming with tears.

"Fuck off, I was there, too." He slapped his arm playfully.

"Wait, seriously??" Roman almost yelled, making Virgil wince.

"Yup." He said in a monotone voice, trying to leave the conversation. He started to walk away, but Roman caught his hood, keeping him in place.

"What is it now?" He grumbled.

"Have you seen Patton?"

"Yeah, he's in my room resting."

"Is he oka-" Before Roman could finish that question, it was immediately answered by a scream, coming from Virgils room.

"Shit." Virgil immediately ran back into his room, swinging the door open. Roman followed close behind, worry filling his veins.

Patton was curled up in a tight ball, his hands held over his mouth as black liquid mixed with blood poured from it. Tears were streaming down his cheeks in a steady flow, mixing with the other two fluids. He could barely see, but he was able to quickly yell a, "It hurts!!" as he screwed his eyes shut. He was hit with another wave of pain as more blood poured down his forehead. The crack was at least two times bigger than Virgil had last seen, although he was gone for barely a minute.

"Help.." He whispered as Virgil ran over to him, but Roman was stuck at the door. He couldn't move. He didn't know how to.

"Shh, shh, I'm here. It's okay. I know it hurts. Breathe. Breathe for me." Virgil rambled, holding Patton tightly in his arms.

"V-Virge..?" Patton whispered as he gripped the fabric of his soft hoodie, letting out another, quieter sob. Virgil just nodded, allowing Patton soak his clothes with tears and blood, making a mental note to clean it off later.

Logan walked in, confused but mad.

"WHY IS EVERYONE..." he saw Patton, "...yelling..." he finished, mumbling.

Heartbreak. What everyone in that room felt. Patton. Virgil. Logan. But especially Roman.

He was having his own mini panic attack, still standing in the doorway with Logan. Logan put a soft hand on his upper arm, rubbing circles with his thumb.

"It's going to be alright, Roman. Can you take a deep breath with me?" Logan asked, gripping his shoulders firmly, but in a caring way, making sure to not let go.

Roman gave a hasty nod, looking Logan in the eyes.

"In," Logan started, mentally counting out 4 seconds exactly.

"Now hold," He said as he began to count 7 seconds.

"Now out." 8 seconds.

Logan gave a satisfied smile, "Good. Now, can you try that again?"

They did the breathing exercise for a few minutes, Logan still holding onto Romans shoulders. But Logan moved his hand a bit to wipe a stray tear that was dribbling down Romans cheek, making it dry once again.

But more tears poured as Roman shook Logan off, going to his boyfriend. Logan followed, not having much else to do. Patton had calmed down - thanks to Virgil - the slightest bit. He was still coughing up a bit of blood, and the unidentifiable black liquid from before, though. But he could actually breathe now without letting out another sob, so that's progress. Even if it's just a bit.

As soon as Patton realized that Roman was there, he crawled over to him, laying his head on his shoulder. Roman wrapped his arms around him, giving him a hug, and a small kiss on the top of his head. Much to Logans and Virgils surprise, Patton broke down once again, leaning fully into Roman.

"Let it out, baby. Let it all out... It's okay..." Roman ran his fingers through Pattons soft but tangled hair, giving him small kisses. Patton sobbed so hard that it almost hurt more than the growing cracks. He just wanted to be okay.

Logan sat on the bed next to the others, making a small circle/triangle type group. He patted the sobbing boys back softly, trying his best to be comforting. Pattons eyes began to burn, more than tears ever could. He let out a small whimper, trying not to cry out in pain. He put a hand to his cheek, in which his tears were rolling down. Or well, he thought it was tears. But it was just the same black liquid as before.

Heartbreak...

What may be the end of Pattons whole life.

His actions being uncontrollable, he coughed hard, more liquid reddening his eyes as he sobbed.

"I-it...h-hurts..." He croaked out, curling in on himself as he shook.

"I know, Pat. Just keep breathing. It's okay. You're going to be okay." Virgil spoke, sliding into the hug. Logan decided to join the group hug, they all held Patton in their arms. Patton gave a sad, bloody, smile, enjoying the warmth around him. He coughed once again, more blood spilling out. None of the sides were bothered by the stains that soaked their clothes. But they were all bothered by the sight of Patton. It hurt each of them.

"I...I love you all.." Patton said much too clearly, pain contorting his face.

"Goodbye."

Heartbreak.

What had killed Patton that morning.

[And the artwork I promised in the warnings✨]

#sanders sides #patton sanders #patton sanders angst #heartbreak #angst #sanders sides angst #sanders sides fan fiction #sanders sides oneshot

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iatethepomegranate · 3 years ago

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We are not alone in the dark with our demons, Chapter 11

In which Caleb buys a house in Rexxentrum with Beau and Yasha, becomes a professor, and learns to be a person and protect those who have been hurt like he has.

Content warnings: Caleb's backstory, mentions of abuse from teachers, discussions of institutionalisation, implied medical abuse

Chapter summary: Caleb was hurting, but he wasn't the only one. If he could do nothing else, he could care for his friends, and they could care for him.

Chapter notes: Kirschtorte is just Black Forest Cake with the geographic reference removed because Zemnian. Chapter title is from Neptune by Sleeping At Last

Chapter 11: If brokenness is a work of art surely this must be my masterpiece

Dinner was a solemn affair, no matter how much Caduceus and Yasha tried to provide comfort in the food they made. The spiced, fried bugs that Yasha had convinced them all to try were actually very good. And they hadn’t made apple tarts today--Jester would have been furious if they’d tried it in her absence--but they made a different Zemnian dessert instead: Kirschtorte. Layers of chocolate sponge sandwiched with whipped cream, sour cherries and a cherry liqueur unique to the Zemni Fields, with a few cherries placed on top.

It tasted so much like home that Caleb stopped eating, folded his arms on the table, rested his head on them, and cried. He had been too tired to excuse himself.

“Was the cake that bad?” Yasha half-whispered.

“No,” Beauregard said thickly. “It’s good, babe. I don’t think that’s… I think it’s been a long day. Long two days.”

Essek rubbed slow circles into Caleb’s back, but the group let him cry without disturbing him. Caduceus handed him a glass of water when he was finished. Caleb did not miss Beauregard twisting away from him to wipe her eyes. And Caleb was struck by another wave of emotion, grief at how much Beauregard was hurting, that almost brought him to tears all over again.

After dinner, Essek helped Caduceus and Yasha with the dishes. They hadn’t let Caleb or Beauregard help tonight. Caleb caught Beauregard as she left the kitchen, and guided her to the couch. They sat together, quietly at first. Sometimes Caleb felt so many things that it seemed impossible to put them into words. But he couldn’t leave things like this; she had gotten involved because of him. She’d run into a burning house with him, she’d watched Felix so Caduceus could help him try to save the Baumanns, she’d spent a day and night watching over Nico in the same state she knew Caleb himself had once been in. Eleven years in Vergesson, broken under the weight of what he had done to his mother and father. She knew all that. She knew more than almost anyone what he had gone through; she had listened to his story and written it down so they could stop Trent from hurting anyone else, and give Caleb just a little shred of peace. She cared about Caleb. She cared about people like him. And she had also been abused by a powerful man.

And they’d had the chance to help Nico in a way neither of them had been helped when they most needed it (and what help they had received only came years after the damage was done). Then, all their efforts to help Nico had failed. She’d mobilised the monks and done her best to find him, and had come up empty just like Caleb had.

She was hurting, too.

Caleb took her hand in both of his and, feeling awkward about it, kissed her knuckles. Beauregard looked at him strangely.

“Uh, Caleb? You’re being weird.”

“You’re a good friend, Beauregard.” Caleb patted her hand, setting it down on her leg.

“Oh, we’re gonna have one of those talks.”

Caleb’s track record for emotional conversations with Beauregard was, for the most part, horrifying. They were both awkward people who sometimes understood each other well, and other times couldn’t understand each other at all. He had, on more than one occasion, stormed away from a conversation silently screaming.

“Beauregard…” He sighed. Caleb was running on sheer willpower, emotionally bruised and given to cry at a moment’s notice. But he wanted her to know how much he appreciated her, and how sorry he was for her pain. “Thank you.”

“Caleb, we’ve been over this. You don’t need to say this shit.”

“I do, though.” Caleb hadn’t meant for his voice to sound so small. So fragile. But he… Caleb needed her to hear this.

She looked away. “Sorry. I just… you’re going through a lot of shit, and I don’t want you to feel, like, obligated…” She trailed off, staring at the colourful, jewel-toned rug Jester had brought from Nicodranas.

“This is not easy for you, either,” Caleb said, and Beauregard sagged against the couch, looking at him like he had grown another head.

“Caleb, what the fuck?”

“You are a caring person, Beauregard. And you know better than most what those children have been through. You listened to my story and wrote it down for me. You stood with me while I faced Trent in the courtroom and recounted, again, everything he had done to me.” Caleb didn’t know where he found the strength to speak, to build up the steam he needed to spill out all his feelings, but he did it because Beauregard needed to know. For both their sakes. “You and Veth were the first people I ever told. You are… invested. You care. You are kind and good. I need you to know that I am grateful for everything you have done for me, and for people like me.”

“Caleb, I know you’re grateful,” Beauregard said, with that same tired frustration she often had when he was being emotionally obtuse. “You’re also a fucking wreck and need to stop wasting your time on me.”

“I am not wasting anything,” Caleb said. He had to fight down his frustration. Neither of them were comfortable having this kind of focus on them, and she was trying to be a good friend. “That is not all I wanted to say. I want you to know… I see you.” Caleb wasn’t great at eye contact, but he made a special effort now, locking eyes with Beauregard and hoping she got it. Hoping she understood he knew she was suffering, and that it mattered to him.

“Hard not to, man. I’m pretty hot.”

“I’m glad you know that about yourself.” It would have been easy to let her deflect, but Caleb steeled himself to drag this conversation where he intended it to go. “But that is not what I meant. You know that.”

Beauregard averted her eyes once again.

“Yesterday was hard. Today was hard. For all of us. And you…” Caleb reached for her hand, relieved that she let him hold it. “You have been abused as well. And yet, you ran into a burning house with me. You saw Nico unresponsive in Wulf’s arms, knowing I was once like that, too. You watched over Felix while Caduceus and I tried to save Nico’s parents. Then, you watched over Nico and had to witness what I was going through that day, and that night. You have seen me in a bad place before, and that was the worst I have been in a long time, and I know it was confronting for all of you. And you did everything you could to keep Nico from running, and you were there when it all fell apart. I know you are hurt, Beauregard. And you are allowed to be. Please allow that for yourself.”

She squeezed his hand, and some of her guardedness fell away to reveal the sheer depths of sadness in her eyes. “I love you, man.”

“I love you, too, Beauregard. Thank you, and I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I’d do it all again in a heartbeat.”

“I know. You are a good person. I am sorry for your pain, because I am your friend.”

Beauregard clasped his hand in both of hers, staring down at the tangle of fingers. “I’m worried about you, Caleb. And about the kids. But I can do something about you, at least.”

“You have done a lot already, Beauregard. Thank you.” He tugged her by the hand until she shuffled close enough that he could throw his arms around her and drag her into the tightest hug he could manage. She squeezed him back, and his spine cracked a little in a way he didn’t know he had needed on both a physical and emotional level until relief flooded through his system.

****

Caduceus stayed overnight in case he was needed, and Essek dropped him back at the Grove the following morning.

“Call me any time,” Caduceus had said as his parting words. “Whatever you need, even if it’s in the middle of the night, I’ll be ready.”

The Volstrucker and the monks continued searching for Nico, and Caleb was at a loose end. So he launched himself into preparing for the upcoming semester, his first as a teacher. He split his time at home between his study in the dormer, the floor of Beau and Yasha’s living room, and occasionally the Cobalt Soul Archives while Beau was working, depending on how much his need for privacy warred with his need to have his loved ones close at hand.

Essek stayed. Caleb stewed in silent guilt whenever he let himself think about it too much, but he knew better than to ask Essek to leave when the man was clearly worried about him. More often than not, Caleb left the house with his hair braided, whether it was a single braid at the back or, Essek’s favourite, two narrow braids tucked into a half or full ponytail. Sometimes it felt like Caleb’s mental health hinged entirely on the presence of a braid.

Caleb sent daily messages to Felix and Nico. For Felix, it was simple to find a routine. A question about his day, little tidbits about a spell the boy had indicated an interest in, updates on the search for Nico, and whether either of them had received responses from him (the answer, thus far, was no). He didn’t push Felix for an answer about school. Not yet.

For Nico, Caleb weighed his words far more carefully.

On one day: “Hallo, Nico. It’s Caleb. How are you? I am working from home today. You are welcome here any time.”

A few hours after that: “Hallo, Nico. Caleb again. I just wanted to say: I know how you are feeling. I went through this as well. You’re in my thoughts.”

Another day: “Hallo, Nico. Me again. Are you safe? It’s cold out. Remember to drink water. Boil it first if necessary.”

And another: “Hallo, Nico. I am a teacher at the Academy now. I intend to watch these fuckers like a hawk. Keep the kids safe, ja?”

He burned a second spell for that one: “We deserved better. I will make sure the children who come after us get it. And you… come back when you’re ready. Let me help.”

And countless other messages, little updates about his day, about Felix, about work, about just… coming back in one piece.

And he did not receive a single response. Caleb cried more often than not after going through this. He preferred to be alone in his study in those moments, and the others had learned not to disturb him until he was ready to be around people again.

Overall, he felt he had been pretty good about it. He kept busy, spent time with his friends, let Essek hover around him and take care of him. Caleb let Essek help with his lesson plans, bounce around ideas for a presentation he would have to make in the first week of semester as a new teacher at the Academy. He had already told the Nein they were invited, and had spoken to Astrid to make sure the non-citizens would be welcome.

He also remembered to invite Nico, on the off-chance the boy needed a specific call to action to return to Rexxentrum.

“Hallo, Nico. I am presenting a talk next week at the Academy on the first day of semester. 7 o’clock. You would be welcome.”

Caleb met regularly with Bettina and Alphira to work on their lesson plans together. He spent most of that time with Bettina, given he would literally be taking over one of her classes. He was mostly assisting Alphira, though she was interested to get him in to talk to the senior Evocation students at some point about his experiences with the Sending spell. Including the funny ones with Jester. There was also an interesting discussion to be had about why Sending was considered an Evocation spell while Message was considered a Transmutation cantrip. Both professors spoke carefully in a way that suggested they knew what had happened with Felix and Nico, but they never brought it up. He was relieved they let him keep his academic work separate from that heartbreaking shitshow.

Between work, Caleb found time to catch up with Astrid and Wulf. He pretended not to notice their visible relief whenever they saw him, because he was genuinely unsure what they would do if he brought it up.

At a certain point, meeting in Astrid’s office brought up too many memories, so they moved their meetings to the dance hall. Beauregard, Yasha and even a disguised Essek had “accidentally” wandered in on more than one occasion.

“Are you still talking to Felix?” Astrid asked him as the three of them sat around a table in the farthest corner of the room from the dance floor.

“Ja, he doesn’t tell me everything, but he responds at least.”

“Still nothing from Nico?”

Caleb didn’t need to say it out loud; he couldn’t school his expression to hide the pain there. And Astrid and Wulf had once known him very well.

Astrid reached out, touched the back of his hand where it rested on the table beside his mug of ale. “I’m sorry, Bren.”

Wulf had his eye on Yasha, who was calmly drinking at the bar. “Astrid’s people are still looking for him.”

Caleb did his best to shrug off the hurt. “I know.”

Astrid squeezed his hand once and then retreated. “Now, about your lesson plans…”

She had been teaching for a while, so Astrid had plenty of advice to give. However, she was also hesitant to steer Caleb too much.

“You have good instincts,” she told him every time they spoke about it. “Trust them.”

On their way out of the dance hall, where they had sat for a good three hours, Astrid caught Caleb’s arm.

“One more thing. I have secured a venue at the Academy for the support group, mid-week. I have contacted most of the Volstrucker. We are ready to go ahead when you are.”

“Astrid, the point of this is not for one person to steer it.”

Astrid raised an eyebrow at him. “Bren, we need a dedicated person to drive this. And that person is you.”

The thought of that was frightening. Caleb was barely figuring out how to be a person himself, let alone be responsible for the healing of dozens of people who had been under Trent’s thumb for far longer than he had.

“Astrid.”

“I am not expecting you to have all the answers for them,” she said firmly. “But you have had more time to process than the rest of us have.” She gave a small, wry chuckle. “In fact, you may be the most stable of us all.”

“Astrid, that is horrifying.”

“She’s right,” said Wulf. “Besides, you have a way with people. Always have.”

Caleb was not like Fjord or Jester or Caduceus who always seemed to have something to say when someone was hurting, but he could talk when he had to. He feared some of the Volstrucker would not take him seriously because he had broken, or because he had gotten out long before they had. This would take time. Fortunately, Caleb was one of the few Empire wizards with in-depth knowledge of time, learned from a reliable source.

Astrid still held his arm. She slid down to grip his hand instead. “I know this will not be easy for you. You were always sensitive. But that is why you have a chance with these people. They are not…” She sighed. “Trent made sure we don’t know how to exist in a world without his boot on our throats.”

“We don’t know how to process our emotions,” Wulf said, and it was odd to hear him admit it aloud. “Well, most of us. You do all right.”

Caleb laughed at that, because it sounded like a horrible joke. Caleb, who felt so constantly bruised on the inside that even the slightest inconvenience threatened to send him into tears. Who still woke up gasping in the night. Who was so choked by pain sometimes that words left him. Processing his emotions? It was more likely that his emotions processed him. Like a fucking meatgrinder.

Astrid frowned at him. “Let’s take a walk. Just the three of us.” She glanced back at the door, where Yasha was visible. “If your shadow will allow it.”

“My shadow does what she likes,” Caleb muttered, letting Astrid tug him along. Wulf took his other hand, leaving him little choice to let the two of them take him where they willed.

They wound up in a small park they had used to visit regularly, especially when drunk after a night of dancing. It was strange to see it in daylight, and while Caleb was mostly sober. They sat on the grass beside a small ornamental pond, Astrid and Wulf pointedly bookending Caleb, sitting close enough for their shoulders to touch. The wind played with the strands of Caleb’s hair that had fallen out of his braid. He never bothered to fix them because Essek found it endearing.

“I apologise,” said Astrid. “I did not mean to upset you.”

“I’m not upset, Astrid.” At her doubtful noise, he added, “Not at you.”

“You should get out of Rexxentrum,” she said abruptly. “Just for a few days. We have things well in hand. Your lesson plans are solid. Bettina and Alphira are pleased. You do not need to be here until next week.”

“And if Nico comes back?”

“You will be contacted. I promise.” Astrid looked to Wulf, who shrugged at her, which caused her to roll her eyes. “Jester keeps pestering me to make you visit Nicodranas.”

Caleb had been messaging with Jester regularly, and she had hinted that he should visit, but she was usually a lot more explicit when she wanted to see him. And he knew she was talking to Yasha, Beau and Essek, but none of them had said much about it.

It was odd. “Is there a reason she is pestering you and not the people I literally live with?”

Astrid shrugged. “I may have let a few things slip.”

“Astrid, you do not ‘let things slip.’”

She looked utterly unashamed. “Well, apparently you had not told some of your dearest friends you are going through a rough patch, so I did it for you.”

“In how much detail, exactly?” Caleb did not like to be angry with his friends, especially Astrid, but he needed to work out how much of a problem he needed to have with her.

“Very little, just enough that she knows you are not at your best. I would not rob you of that agency.”

That last part hit Caleb harder than he could have expected. “I… thank you.”

Caleb had to admit he missed his friends terribly. Especially Veth, who of all the Nein had seen him at his worst, helped him put the pieces of his brain together on the days he collapsed, who had cuddled up to him on bad days, who had been the first friend he’d had in many years. And Jester, who knew how to ruin a dark mood. Fjord, with his quiet understanding. Kingsley with his… Kingsleyness that was a little painfully close to Molly sometimes but more than welcome.

He always knew they would be worried sick if he told them even a fraction of what had happened in the last few days. Seeing the pain he brought to Caduceus, Yasha, Beau and Essek was hard enough. But they loved him. Those who did not know what had happened would want to know, so they could help.

And he was touched that Astrid and Wulf had taken the time to sit him down and discuss this with him. He didn’t know what they were now. Maybe he never would. Maybe they were friends again. They had all changed so much, Caleb especially, that it was hard to say if they could even be friends. But Caleb wanted it. He wanted it a lot.

“I suppose I can spare a day or two,” he finally said. It would be good for Essek to get out of Rexxentrum, too. Maybe he could drag Beau and Yasha out for a bit, even if Beau had obligations at the Archive.

Wulf and Astrid looked at each other in a knowing way he had not seen from them in seventeen years. The familiarity was strange, and a little uncomfortable, but also comforting at the same time. He had spent so much time emphasising how much he still cared for them, doing his best to drag them away from Trent, and then gently guiding them through sharing their trauma to put Trent away for good. But he had never forgotten that for such a long time, they were the ones looking out for him and protecting him. He had done the same for them, of course, but there had often been an unspoken understanding that Caleb was just a little bit squishy, needed just a little extra care.

Caleb was also keenly aware that sometimes it was easier to care for someone else than to care for yourself.

Wulf’s large hand found Caleb’s knee. “Good. Say hi to Fjord for me.”

“Tell him yourself,” Caleb muttered, because he knew Wulf would find it more funny than offensive.

Wulf chuckled and squeezed his knee. “Oh, and warn your boyfriend: if he hurts you, I will cut off his balls.”

“You will have to beat me there,” said Astrid.

Okay, this conversation had taken so many twists and turns that Caleb had half a mind to visit the Grove and ask Caduceus to check him for whiplash. Unsurprising, really. Things were complicated between the three of them and likely would be for a very long time.

He wasn’t sure what to say about the fact his exes were on the cusp of threatening his current partner, and not in the way one might expect. Caleb found himself fiddling with the end of his braid while he tried to process what the fuck was happening to him.

Finally, he said, “There are a great many people who would fuck him up if he ever put a foot wrong with me, and he himself is first in line. You need not worry about that. Thank you for your… concern?”

Astrid and Wulf shared another look, much more pained than the last. Then they both looked away, Astrid into the grass and Wulf at the pond.

“He treats you well?” she said quietly.

“Ja, very well. He came back to take care of me.” Caleb had no words for the depths of his gratitude towards Essek. He was always gentle with Caleb, sensitive to his needs. And these last few days, he had been nothing but a source of endless love and support, a soft place to land when Caleb felt like he was in freefall. He always offered this, but every protective and caring instinct in Essek had been cranked upward, like casting an old, reliable third-level spell at eighth level instead. Or ninth, though Caleb and Essek were not quite to that level of magical skill yet.

“Good,” Wulf muttered. “You play with your braid when you talk about him.”

Caleb chuckled, not even embarrassed he had been caught with such an obvious tell. “Ja, he likes to braid my hair for me.”

“Hard to hate a man who braids his partner’s hair.” Wulf’s voice was almost wistful; Caleb’s hair had never been long enough to braid when the three of them were together, but they had occasionally been able to get a small one into Astrid’s hair.

“Good. Don’t.”

Astrid’s hand found Caleb’s other knee. “You’ve been through a lot, even in the past few days alone. And… we know you are capable. You have the willpower and the support you need to get through all of this, and to guide the Volstrucker who agree to attend the support group. But we do worry for you. And we are… glad… you have people in your life who take care of you.” Once again, she could not look at him. “Wulf and I… we are sorry we failed you.”

That was a new one. “Astrid, what the fuck are you talking about?”

“Greater Restoration,” Wulf said quietly.

“If we had found the nerve to talk to a cleric ourselves,” added Astrid, “we could have gotten you out of there years ago.”

Right. Vergesson. “Trent wouldn’t have allowed it. You know that.”

“We could have tried.”

They had been teenagers. Frightened, grieving teenagers at the mercy of a powerful man. Of all the things Caleb could have held against Astrid and Eadwulf, this would never be one of them.

“You could have gotten us all killed,” Caleb said, forcing steel into his tone in the hope it would break whatever spiral Astrid and Wulf had worked themselves into. “You didn’t know that Greater Restoration would have done shit for me. Why would you? That is not the skillset Trent cultivated in us. He taught us how to hurt people, because we were to be his weapons. He had us murder our own fucking parents because all he wanted us to know was violence and pain and fear and utter reliance on him alone. You do not need to apologise for not taking on a fool’s errand.”

They refused to look at him once again. Jaws clenched. Eyes wild and staring holes into the ground.

“We were children,” Caleb reminded them, squeezing their hands where they remained on his knees. “We were children. Of all the things we have done or not done, that is the last thing I will ever let you apologise for. Do not hurt yourselves, hurt me, like this. Please.”

Astrid’s free hand pressed over her mouth, catching a sob. Wulf’s thumb drew a slow circle on Caleb’s knee.

“You’re right,” Wulf said quietly. “It would have been foolish. But we…”

“We were cowards,” Astrid snapped. “We left you there for eleven years. Trent made sure you were cared for, but… it was Vergesson. And you were defenceless.”

“I am well aware,” Caleb said before she could pull up memories that were far too painful for any of them. “I have told you before that I remember little of my time there. I would prefer it remain that way, I think.” Caleb wasn’t sure he could survive remembering that place beyond the flashes of awful that would sometimes come to him.

“I’m sorry, Bren. I’m sorry.”

“Shhhh. Enough of that.”

Astrid cleared her throat, straightened up. Evidently she had remembered they were technically in a public place.

“Do us a favour,” said Wulf. “Go to Nicodranas. Get some rest.”

“I will, if the two of you will also do me a favour.”

Astrid, newly composed, raised an eyebrow at him. “What is this favour?”

“Try to hate yourselves a little less. Hypocritical coming from me, but I think we could all stand to be kinder to ourselves.” Caleb had said almost those exact words to Essek in the Blooming Grove all those months ago, and he was struck by how much he had a type.

“All right,” she said, smiling with so much affection that Caleb was taken back to their first kiss in a freezing cold tower. “You first.”

They parted ways not long afterwards, and Yasha melted out of the shadows to walk Caleb home.

“That looked very intense,” she said, leading him by the hand like he was a small child bound to get lost in a big city. “Are you okay?”

“I think so. Think you can convince Beauregard to visit Nicodranas for a bit?”

Yasha chuckled. “I think I can manage.”

****

Making arrangements for Nicodranas kept Caleb from stewing too much in his talk with Astrid and Wulf. That was welcome. He appreciated the care they still had for him, but there were some things that were still too painful and probably always would be. He had already messaged Jester to confirm the Nein Heroez would be in dock at the time.

“Of course, Caleb! Did Astrid talk to you? She’s super nice, and she really cares about you a lot. I’m sorry I was mean to--” The message cut off at twenty-five words; Jester’s word economy, or lack thereof, would always be a source of joy even on a bad day.

Essek, mercifully, had messaged Veth for him; she would hear the exhaustion in Caleb’s voice and worry herself into a panic.

Despite the flurry of activity, Caleb still found himself occasionally caught, freezing in the act of folding a shirt or cataloguing his spell components. And he’d remember how much the two visits to Vergesson he had made since his escape had rattled him. The few memories he had were bad enough, and he knew so much of the pain the place brought him was buried in his subconscious. Or in moments that his body seemed to remember but his mind didn’t.

The bloodbath he’d caused while on the amulet heist. So on edge that he had forgotten a crucial detail about the Wall of Force spell until he had expended all his spells that he could have used to disintegrate it. Caleb did not forget things like that. Until he did, apparently. And then there had been his complete inability to do anything but fight when Trent had appeared suddenly, temporarily thwarting their escape. He’d fallen back on his training. Always his training. And the violence it entailed.

While part of him was a tiniest bit curious what had happened during those eleven years, if nothing else to further catalogue Trent’s sins on the public record and dig up his accomplices, most of him hoped he never found out.

As he stood a little too long in these thoughts, a pair of dusky purple hands lifted Caleb’s component pouch from his shaking grip, setting it aside. Essek sat Caleb on the end of the bed and wordlessly climbed behind him, knees gently pressing Caleb’s hips as he pulled the braid loose and began it anew. The gentle tugging motions slowly pulled Caleb back into his body, and the present.

Essek finished off the braid and kissed Caleb’s neck. “Do you want to talk about it?”

More like Caleb needed to talk about it before he imploded. “Astrid and Wulf apologised for not getting me out of Vergesson themselves. And… I think they know some parts of what happened to me there. Things I don’t remember. Things I don’t want to remember. Things I might know subconsciously that I don’t think I can handle knowing consciously. I’m just… out of sorts, I suppose.”

Essek slid his arms around Caleb’s chest, pressing himself up against his back, squishing their cheeks together. “I would like to turn them into spaghetti for making you think about this when you have enough to worry about, but you would be upset with me.”

“I’m not angry with them.”

“I know.” Essek kissed his cheek, nuzzling Caleb’s stubble.

“Vergesson is… I do not like the person I became when I was last there. I don’t think I could survive remembering what happened to me.”

“Then don’t try to remember.” Essek flattened his palm over Caleb’s heart and gently pressed down, forcing Caleb to focus more on his breathing. Remembering that his heart still beat. He was here.

More immediate, practical thoughts began to filter back into Caleb’s mind. He remembered he was going to Send to Caduceus and invite him to Nicodranas. Caduceus would hear the rough edges in Caleb’s voice, but he could handle it far better than most of the Nein.

“Hallo, Caduceus. It’s Caleb. We are visiting Nicodranas for a few days tomorrow. Would you like to come? We can pick you up in the morning.”

There was a slight pause, and then Caduceus’s warm, soothing tone filled Caleb’s mind. “Hey, Caleb. That sounds great. I’ll be ready, with fresh tea for everyone. And sunhats. You and Essek will burn in the sun.”

“Caduceus is in,” Caleb said, stifling a yawn. Essek laughed softly, his breath tickling Caleb’s neck. “Now for Yussa.” He cast again, directing a message to Wensforth. “Hallo, it’s Caleb of the Mighty Nein. We are visiting Nicodranas tomorrow. May we use the circle? It would be good to see you both.”

Wensforth replied quickly. “Yes, of course! The master is eager to speak with you at any time. Please… message before you arrive?”

Caleb let himself laugh a little. The Nein were notoriously awful at warning people of their arrival. And Caleb was touched that Yussa, ever a busy man, thought so highly of them now that he would happily drop everything to talk to them. They had spoken a few times since Cognouza, and if Yussa had been a less restrained man, Caleb had the strong impression he would’ve hugged each and every one of the Nein in gratitude for saving him.

And, to think, Caleb had once been so frightened of him that he could barely speak.

He felt better, so he got up and finished sorting his spell components, making a note that he would need to restock his teleportation circle chalk after a few more uses.

Caleb helped Yasha cook Eintopf that evening, a one-pot stew. Caleb had grown up eating dozens of versions of the stew, but he had his favourites. Carrots, leeks and celeriac were key to the base of the soup, as they were preparing their own broth. Along with a bunch of parsley. Yasha had found some excellent pork sausages at the market today, so those went in along with green beans (Caleb’s sentimental favourite), potatoes, and a ton of onion. Lots of garlic. Yasha had also found marjoram at the market today.

This was a recipe Caleb had helped his mother cook even as a boy, so he also insisted they add apple like she always had. For a little bit of sweetness and acidity. And surprise.

Caleb cleaned and steamed the beans while Yasha browned the meat and onions and potatoes and garlic. From there, they tag-teamed to get everything bubbling away until it was all finally ready to put into a pot and simmer away to completion.

It was a good use of the evening, and it kept Caleb busy and enveloped in happy sensory memories of his mother’s kitchen. While the stew bubbled away, he munched on a few green beans he’d set aside for the fun of it after they had steamed.

Essek hovered in the corner, reading a book about sea creatures Jester had brought him last time she was in town. Caleb pulled out his lesson plans and speech preparation, spreading it out across the dinner table, and made edits into the evening.

Beauregard arrived home from work--Yasha had visited her already to persuade her to come with them to Nicodranas. And then they ate dinner together at the table, and the taste of home did not send Caleb into a grief spiral tonight. This time, it just soothed him.

Before bed, Caleb sent one last message: “Hallo, Nico. It’s Caleb. I will be in Nicodranas for a few days. If you need shelter and the house is empty, take the key--” He cast again. “From inside the flowerpot on the right side of the house. I have an illusion set to guide you. Password: Wilkommen. Gute nacht.”

No response, but Caleb hadn’t expected one. He let Essek tuck him into bed. They curled up together, Essek slowly but firmly stroking his back with grounding pressure, until Caleb fell asleep.

#caleb widogast #professor widogast #shadowgast #essek thelyss #astrid beck #eadwulf grieve #blumendrei #blumentrio #critical role #cr2 #beauregard lionett #yasha nydoorin #my fics #fanfiction #the pomegranate's professor widogast fic

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writingpaperghost · 3 years ago

Text

There is a Me Who Can Become Strong (Chapter 1)

Emu liked working at Seito University Hospital, intern or not. Sure, his coworkers at the CR were a bit… interesting, but not in the bad way. Saki was, overall, pretty nice, even if she could sometimes get really stern. The director was a bit silly, but still took his job seriously. Technically, Nico didn’t work with the CR, and she was often a bit much. Same with Taiga, who was really set on getting the Gashats, for some reason. Kiriya had a bit of a skill for getting into Emu’s personal space, but it wasn’t too bad.

Everything seemed to have been going well, but with the sudden increase of Game Disease cases, it becomes clear something is happening. Unfortunately for Emu, the past doesn’t stay in the past.

My newest project, that struck me like a lightning bolt and made me go, "Huh, that's actually a great idea". Now, you may be asking, "Are you really going to rewrite all of Ex-Aid"? The answer is: Yeah, probably.

It gets angsty, unsurprisingly.

Chapter 1: I'm a Kamen Rider!

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32857183/chapters/81535450

Emu liked working at Seito University Hospital. He liked the people – the nurses were kind and liked him – he liked seeing the children smile when he’d send them back to their parents (unbidden, he’s often reminded of the words that changed Emu’s life). During his breaks, he’d help entertain the children, by playing games for them. He was really good at video games (in the past, Emu Hojo was Genius Gamer M. It’s been a while since he’d been, but now he was something just as important, Doctor Emu, even if he was still just an intern). The pediatrics ward had become like a second home to him.

---

Two figures stand on a rooftop, looking out at the city.

One had messy light brown hair, which held the appearance that there had, at some point, been an attempt to comb it. His attire was probably the most interesting part about him. He wore a reddish brown jacket, the shirt underneath having one sleeve of a similar color, the right sleeve a green color, and the rest being greyish green in color. He had a necklace of fangs around his neck.

Beside him, stands the other man, wearing a hoodie, clearly inspired by Mighty, the mascot of the up and coming game from Gemn Corporation, Mighty Action X. It was pink, like Mighty, and as he had the hood up, one could see the spikes of hair, just like Mighty’s. Beneath, he wore a Mighty Action X shirt, which had Mighty and his hammer printed on it. Notably, he wore bright pants, cyan with orange stripes, his whole outfit being leagues brighter than his companion’s. His face is obscured by his long bangs and the hood of the coat, but one can make out the faint glow of red from where his left eye, the one unhidden by his bangs, is.

“I can’t believe they finally let you out,” The first of the two said, sounding terribly unamused regardless.

The one in the Mighty hoodie responded in a slightly joyful tone, though subdued, “He said that they thought I had enough control that I could stay calm.”

The first scoffs, “Sure,” He said, “Well, it sounds like today will be big, anyway.”

“Big?” The second asks, “I wonder what they have planned?”

“I guess we’ll find out,”

---

Unfortunately, Emu was a bit clumsy – he tried his best but it was just so easy to catch your foot on even the smallest of things! This clumsiness usually only affected him but sometimes… Well sometimes, he ended up with a towel thrown in his face thanks to his patient. He’s not sure why, but Sota had thrown it and used it as a distraction to run away. Emu, to his credit, got the towel off his face and gave it to the nurse, rushing off after him.

He follows Sota out of the hospital and through the nearby parts of the city. Unfortunately, either his luck or his coordination ran out, and his foot finds a cart, for moving big boxes. Then he goes on an un-asked for rollercoaster ride down the hill, where he can see but a single person at the end. He found himself instead wondering who’s Rollercoaster Tycoon ride he’d wandered into – no, no, focus! The woman!

He crashes into the suited woman, sending her briefcase flying into the street. Scrambling up, Emu frantically apologizes, “Sorry! I tripped! Sort of!”

The woman sighed, “Pay better attention,” She scolded, then stood, going to pick up the contents of the briefcase, which had been opened by its fall. Emu stands and looks around, ignoring the strange device in the briefcase in favor of looking for Sota. He had to be somewhere…

He sees Sota, standing with something in his hands. It’s pink, shaped a bit like some kind of cartridge. He thinks, in the back of his mind, that it looks familiar, but he doesn’t focus on it much. He runs over, “Sota!”

Sota turns to look at him, and Emu realizes he’s caught the attention of the woman too. “I want to play it,” Sota said, looking between the two of them and the cartridge. Emu squints, able to make out the logo on the cartridge. Mighty Action X, Gemn Corporation’s new game, which was to be released today. Emu had been looking forward to it, planning to pick up a copy after he was done at the hospital today. But why did this woman have this strange cartridge with her.

The woman’s lips settle into a stern expression, ��I’m sorry, but you can’t play that.” Reluctantly, Sota allows her to take the cartridge away, but there’s something in his eyes that hurts Emu. He knows it’s not really the woman’s fault, but for some reason, Sota must really want to play Mighty Action X.

Yet, only a few moments after the woman took the cartridge, Sota collapses, some kind of orange bubbles briefly appearing in his neck. Something about it bugs Emu greatly, like a nagging sensation in some part of him. Something was wrong, and it wasn’t just that Sota had collapsed.

The woman’s reaction was telling enough, whatever this was, she knew. Together, he helps her take Sota back to Seito, down into some underground rooms, which Emu didn’t even think existed. He wants to follow the woman with Sota through the room, but he’s stopped by a man he quickly recognized as the hospital director. “Please just leave and forget about this,” the director had said. He hadn’t seen the man much, but even Emu knew what he looked like. It made sense that the director knew about whatever this place was, but somehow actually seeing him was startling. Then, the director entered the room, leaving Emu standing outside of it.

Something in him wasn’t letting him leave, though. He can’t help but recall the expression on Sota’s face when he held the cartridge, excitement, and then how it fell when the woman, he knew her now as Nurse Asuna, took the cartridge. Recalling the words he’d chosen to live by, Emu had made up his mind. He’d go and he’d help Sota, even if it was just something small. He may not be able to cure whatever disease he had, but he could make him smile. (A part of him was still trying to knock the nagging feeling.)

Luckily, neither the director nor Asuna must have been used to having other people in this area, as they hadn’t locked the door. That meant Emu could easily slip into the rooms that belonged to the part of the hospital known as the Cyber Rescue Center.

---

The director is sitting at the table in the upper room of the CR when he informs Asuna, “Saki will be here tomorrow,” He says, “She’s a perfect fit, I know Director Hinata agreed it would be good to find this Genius Gamer M, but would bringing someone who might not even be familiar with Game Disease truly a good idea?”

Asuna huffs, “Of course, Game Disease is connected to games,” She looks at him, “Who else would be suited to fight it than a genius gamer?”

“But how are you going to find him?”

“I bet I’ll find him at the Mighty Action X launch party, it’s no secret that he’s a fan of Gemn’s games.” Asuna informs him, picking up the briefcase with the Gamer Driver and Mighty Action X Gashat. “I’m going to go find him.”

With that, Asuna leaves the CR, determined to find someone who had barely appeared in the gaming world for six years.

---

It wasn’t hard for Emu to find the patient room, it was right across from the entrance. “Sota?” He called, seeing the small form in the patient’s bed. “It’s me, Emu, you doctor from earlier.”

“What do you want?” The boy asked in a sour tone.

Emu walks over and pulls a chair up to the bed, sitting down at Sota’s side. “Why did you run away earlier?”

“It’s none of your business,” Despite his protest, Emu can’t help but wonder…

“Do you like video games?” Emu asked, seemingly out of nowhere.

“Yeah,” Sota responded weakly, pulling out a Mighty keychain. “I was really excited for Mighty Action X…”

“The launch party is today,” Emu notes, “Did you want to go? Is that why you ran off.” Sota doesn’t verbally answer but nods regardless. It’s then that Emu had his idea, as crazy and questionable as it was.

Emu wastes no time in telling Sota his plan, “How about we go? You can play Mighty Action X,” He said, “After all, it doesn’t matter if you’ve been cured or not if you don’t smile.”

Sota lit up at the idea and Emu put his plan into motion. No one seemed to notice that he and Sota left, something that bugged him, but he was thankful for. They make their way to the launch party. There were a lot of people, which perhaps a few years ago would have made him greatly uncomfortable, but now didn’t bother him at all. Sota seemed so excited as they waited in line so he could play Mighty Action X (there was a pang of jealousy, but he could wait until later today, like he initially planned. In the past, maybe Emu would have cleared his schedule to go to a launch party for a Gemn Corp. game. He’d done it before, but now he just couldn’t. He was busy now, he had more than just game).

All was going well until…

“You!” It was Nurse Asuna. Emu feared her wrath for bringing Sota here ever so slightly, but he was certain that this was the solution. “And Sota! Why did you bring him here? How?”

“It was the stress from missing the game’s release,” Emu quickly explained, “I think that’s why he suddenly got sick. When you’re stressed, it’s harder for your immune system to fight off sickness. Bringing him here should cure his sickness and make him smile.”

Asuna did not look pleased with that explanation, “His sickness isn’t so simple,” She reaches and grabs Sota’s hand, “Come on Sota, we’re heading back to the hospital.”

That strange feeling returned as Sota yelled, “No! It’s almost my turn!”

“Please,” Emu begged, “Just a little longer than he can go back,” He didn’t want a scene to be made, nor did he want Sota to get so stressed. The strange feeling was growing.

“We need to go now,” Asuna continued to tug at Sota. At least, until Sota started glitching and those strange orange bubbles from before to appear again and began to grow. Soon they took the form of some kind of monster. Now, the strange feeling was stronger than ever.

Emu’s not sure what to say, at first, before he finds himself saying, “What’s that?”

Asuna answers, “A Bugster,” she says, “A manifestation of his Game Disease, which is a computer virus that can effect humans.” There’s a lot there in that simple statement, but Emu chooses to just file it away for further scrutiny later.

“What can we do to help him?” He was still Sota’s doctor, he still needed to see Sota smile.

Hesitantly, Asuna opens the briefcase, revealing the device and cartridge once more, responding, “These could fight the Bugster and save him,” She says, watching as Emu raises his hand and comes close to the device, “But only if you can use them.”

Looking at the strange device and cartridge, Emu supposed there was only one way to find out. He takes them, placing the device - a belt of some kind - around his waist and clicked the button on the cartridge. He places it in the slot on the belt and -

Error

He pulls it out, clicks again and puts it back in.

Error

Damn.

His mind flashed to Sota. Device or no, he’d that boy one way or another. He’d see Sota smile.

He takes the belt off, pulling the cartridge out and hands them to Asuna, though the cartridge doesn’t end up leaving his hand.

With his free hand, he lunges forward, reaching towards the monster and grasps. “I’ll change Sota’s fate with my own hands!” He means every word. If no one can help Sota, then Emu will. As he grabs at the monster, his hand and the part of the monster he’d grabbed were glitching. Then, the monster changed. Now it looked like… Salty? From Mighty Action X?

His hand tightens around the cartridge and he accidentally pressed the button once more.

Mighty Action X!

Let’s game! Metcha game! Mucha game! What’s your name? I’m a Kamen Rider!

Around him, a wheel of portraits appears, like a player select screen. He can’t make out the features on most of them, but picked the one that lit up, in front of him.

Level up! Mighty jump! Mighty kick! Mighty-Mighty Action X!

Around Emu, red and blue armor forms, and in his hand appears some weird combination of a gun and an axe. He still held the cartridge in his other hand.

Behind him, Asuna gasps.

Placing the cartridge into the holding slot at his side, he runs towards Salty, slashing with his axe. Salty, seemingly startled still by his existence, further startled by Emu’s transformation, doesn’t have much time to try to dodge. He follows his slash up with a kick, knocking Salty back slightly. Once he’s knocked Salty back, a bunch of strange grunts dressed in chef uniforms appeared.

“Some low level grunts?” Emu wonders, “Well, that’s not too bad.”

He breaks one of the blocks that had spawned when he used the cartridge. A token appears, with the image of a person running quickly. Emu grabs it and feels the power rush through his body, able to run quicky and cut down the grunts. “And powerups too!”

Now it was just Emu and Salty, staring each other down. He quickly switches his weapon to gun mode, shooting at Salty, “The one who’ll cure Sota will be me, Genius Gamer M!” While Salty was stunned, he switched his weapon back to axe mode, breaking a block for a power up, grabbing it and realizing it was a strength enhancement.

He hits Salty a few more times, before jumping back and taking ahold of the cartridge, blowing on it, then placing it into the slot on his weapon.

Mighty Critical Strike!

Running at Salty, he slashes his axe and the power with it. Salty took the hit and was defeated.

Game Clear!

Pulling the cartridge out of his weapon, the armor around Emu remains for a moment, before it disappeared. He sees where Salty had been, now Sota laid on the ground. He runs over, not thinking much at the moment about what happened.

“Sota, are you alright?”

Sota looks up at him and seems happier than ever, “Yes,” He said, then he smiled at Emu, “Thank you, doctor.”

“You’re welcome,” Emu smiled back, “I’m glad you’re happy now,”

---

A teenaged girl is holding up her phone, looking at the screen, the camera zoomed in on the screen. She has long black hair, with a galaxy baseball cap on her head. Her jacket is red and her backpack pink, beneath she wears a shirt for a different Gemn Corp game, Bang Bang Shooting.

It seems she saw the fight between Emu and Salty and had saw what had happened at the launch party. She brings her camera down and frowns.

“That’s him, alright,”

---

A man with a red jacket, ripped capri jeans, and an ugly floral patterned shirt with sunglasses hooked on it wandered the area where the Mighty Action X launch party had been held. He looked around, interested.

“So,” He said, “The game’s begun.”

---

A woman with brown hair held back in a bun, wearing light blue blouse and black slacks sits in the back of a car. Beside her, sits a Gamer Driver. She frowns at her phone as it rings and rings.

Finally, she sighed, “He’s probably busy,” She nods to herself a quietly says, “I’ll just have to surprise him tomorrow.”

---

“This,” Asuna says, gesturing to the CR, “Is the CR. It’s a department dedicated to fighting Bugsters and Game Disease.”

She spins and in a flash of colors and music notes changes her clothes, her hair now a pink bob, and her clothing all yellow and green. “I’m Poppy Pipopapo,” She says, “But outside the CR you call me Asuna.”

“How?” Emu wondered, unable to help but think aloud.

“Oh, well I’m also a Bugster,” She said, “We Bugsters can change parts of our appearance, like hair and clothing.”

He nods in response, “I see…”

“Anyway,” Poppy says, “There are ten strains of Game Disease, corresponding to ten games. The one you fought today was of the Mighty Action X strain. To stop Game Disease, we need to clear all ten of them.”

Emu looks at the games displayed on the screen. He recognized all of them, but at least one hadn’t even been released. He hummed to himself, “Well, I think I’m pretty well suited for the job.”

Poppy nods in agreement, “You’re not just Genius Gamer M,” She cheered, “But also an intern here at the hospital!” Emu can’t help but laugh a little at her enthusiasm.

If there were two things that Emu thought he was good at, it was video games and making his patients smile. He’d clear those games with no continues, that was his new goal now. (Something in the back of his head wanted to analyze all the information he got today with a fine-tooth comb. There were definitely some answers in all of it. He just wished they pointed to something a little different.)

#kamen rider #kamen rider exaid #emu hojo #poppy pipopapo #asuna karino #my writing #there is a me who can become strong

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